#he generally just goes “EW.” and moves on keeping his distance

[bonetrousledbones]

i do have to wonder if one of the more effective anti-thirst measures i could've taken for ebony was making him not like "gross" things/animals

[jisungsmochi]

confessions - park jisung

jisung x reader / jisung being whipped / fluffy, lil angst / hope it makes you feel something lmaoo 

word count: 8.7k 

mini playlist: 

Cloud 9 - Beach Bunny 

Falling - Chase Atlantic 

Enchanted - Taylor Swift 

summary: confessing to your crush was always daunting. but how else were you supposed to let them know how you truly feel? y/n has learned the hard way, always being the confessor rather than the one being confessed to. oh how she wished that one day, someone will have the courage to tell her how they feel, without her always having to make the moves...

//

“i like you”

“ew, you’ll give me cooties”

y/n was barely seven years old when she confessed to her very first crush, lee donghyuck. he rudely rejected her offer to play marbles during lunch, but she wasn’t fazed. she plastered a bright smile on her face, calmly nodding at the little boy,

“cooties aren’t real, it’s probably just germs from not washing your hands!” she snickered, turning on her heel as she made her way to a shaded area in the quad. she left donghyuck speechless that day, slightly bruising the young boy’s ego. how could she be so calm when her very first crush had harshly rejected her? she always tried to display a cheery exterior to her peers, she found it embarrassing if people caught her crying over some boy. so she pushed her feelings aside until she was alone.

when y/n was twelve, she had grown a crush on her desk mate, jeno. he was quiet most of the time, only speaking to her when he needed answers for homework, but she was whipped nonetheless. he was undeniably handsome, especially for someone their age. how was that even possible? she would intently watch him play soccer with his friends on the school oval, softly cheering every time he made a goal. jeno had noticed when she attended his games, often smiling at her from the field.

after weeks of innocent stares in the hallway and short conversations during class, y/n decided it was time to confess to lee jeno. she came up with the cute idea to write a small note to him during class, it read:

hi jeno!! i think you’re really cute, and a great soccer player. i also have a crush on you...would you go out with me?

tick yes or no

she had written the letter in sparkly pink ink, folded it gently before sliding it over to jeno’s desk. the confused boy swiped the card over to his side, slowly opening it. her heart was beating out of her chest. jeno started scribbling on the paper, causing her to furrow her eyebrows, all he needed to do was leave a tick?

jeno returned the note to her, a soft smile plastered on his face. her eyes scanned over the note, landing on his answer. the ‘yes’ box was ticked, followed by a short sentence under it,

would this mean you’re my girlfriend?

tick yes or no

she couldn’t help but smirk at his charms, immediately ticking yes. from that day on, jeno and y/n began dating. but when you’re going through your pre-teen years, things get really dramatic. jeno ended things with y/n after only three months of dating, which seemed like forever for a twelve year old. he dumped her over text, as many pre-teens did back then. she put on a brave front, acting as if she was okay with it all. it wasn’t even a serious relationship, but it was still her first. of course it hurt. but she continued to suffer in silence, no one needed to know.

when y/n was fifteen, almost turning sixteen, she befriended huang renjun. they were always aware of the other, often hanging out in the same cliques. it was the school’s swimming carnival, when she began getting closer to him. after donghyuck had accidentally pushed her into the pool, too caught up with chasing mark around, renjun came to her rescue. he offered her his towel, wrapping her up tightly as he sat and chatted with her while the others scolded donghyuck. he was a great conversationalist, always having something new to talk about. y/n adored that about him. from that day onwards, she would message him back and forth, almost becoming a daily occurrence. they would skype call after school, catching eachother up on any drama or daily events in their early high school lives. she started falling for him, fast. but there was one downfall to renjun. he would never acknowledge y/n at school. whenever he was with his friends, he pretended like he was merely acquaintances with the girl. it hurt her to see him act like nothing was happening between them. word got around that renjun had a crush on somebody. as usual high school gossip goes, the signs led back to y/n. her friends would cheer her on to confess to him, so would his friends. they believed they would be a strong couple. so she decided to take measures into her own hands, opting to confess to huang renjun.

y/n approached the boy during lunch, interrupting his conversation with jaemin.

“can i talk to you, uh privately?” her voice wavered as she spoke, but she stood her ground. renjun looked over at his friends, jaemin raising an eyebrow at him, encouraging him to go with her. he eventually gave in, keeping a slight distance from the nervous girl as they walked around the school grounds together.

“what did you want to talk about?” he coughed slightly, feeling an immense amount of awkwardness around them.

“i wanted to tell you something” she started, now stopping in their tracks. renjun gulped, a guilty feeling beginning to rise in his stomach.

“i like you, renjun. more than a friend” she finally spat out, trying to read the reaction of the boy across from her. but renjun remained silent, eyes avoiding hers. y/n felt deflated, why the hell wasnt he saying anything?

“i-thank you” he stuttered, causing her to raise an eyebrow at him. thank you?

“i mean thank you for telling me, it’s nice that you’re so honest” renjun tried to smile, but she didn’t budge. he wasn’t taking this seriously at all.

“you know what, just forget i said anything, bye renjun” y/n rolled her eyes, fed up with this constant rejection that seemed to follow her around. why couldn’t she get a happy ending? just for once. why did she have to settle for less than what she deserved? not only did she get rejected by a crush that day, she lost a great friend. y/n swore that she would stop focusing on chasing other’s affections. what was the point? she was just going to get rejected anyway. atleast that’s what she always told herself. those memories always stuck with her, and she refused to ever feel so dejected in life. she wouldn’t let this happen again. she just wanted someone to confess to her for once, would that really be so hard?

park jisung was a simple boy, cruising through life with little to no worries. all he wanted to do was finish high school, he dreaded it more than anything. everyday was the same for him, waking up to the same alarm, riding his skateboard to school, sitting for what seemed like forever, then going home to rest and repeat. he never took notice of those around him, why would he? it’s not like he was going to stay in touch with many of them after school finished. except for his best friend, chenle, he could never escape him no matter how hard he tried.

it was the first day of junior year, when jisung found himself placed in a seating plan for his modern history class.

‘is this really necessary?’ he mumbled to himself, shuffling to his assigned seat. atleast it’s by the window, he thought to himself.

y/n strolled through the halls, making her way to her first period class, modern history. a new year, a fresh new start. she waltzed into the room, noticing students gathering around the seating chart. she found her name, whipping her head around the classroom, eyes landing on a messy haired boy next to the window. she shrugged to herself, not recognising him at all. as she made her way to the desk, jisung suddenly perked up. she was stunning. it may have only been nine in the morning, but seeing her was enough to completely wake the previously tired boy up.

“hey, i guess we’re deskmates” y/n greeted politely, taking a seat right next to the timid boy. jisung was thinking of something witty to say, but nothing was coming to mind.

“y-yes we are” was all he managed to let out. y/n just nodded at him, eyes focusing on their teacher who had called the attention on the room. but jisung couldn’t keep his eyes off her. how had he never seen her before? she was practically glowing, her soft features accentuated by the light. he was breath taken by her, despite only having shared simple greetings.

y/n felt the boy staring at her, but decided not to call him out on it. she promised herself to not get involved with anyone this year. it would only bring her eventual rejection again. so she tried her best to ignore park jisung, it was the only way to get him to lose interest.

“i don’t think she’s too fond of me” jisung confides in his best friend, chenle as they sit under the bleachers, munching on their lunch.

“can you blame her? you probably ask her too many unnecessary questions” chenle smirked, teasing his pouty friend.

“no, i don’t even talk to her much, she just refuses to acknowledge my existence” jisung lets out an exhausted puff, thinking back to his numerous attempts to atleast become acquainted with his desk mate. firstly, he tried greeting her brightly each morning, in which she would only raise her eyebrows before pulling out her books for the class. secondly, jisung attempted to ask her questions about class work, in which she shushed him, pointing over to the teacher who was speaking. even after class, she would immediately pack her things before he had the chance, rushing out the door as if she was the flash or something.

“sounds like she just isn’t fond of people in general. does she even have any friends?” chenle questioned, trying his best to pull his friend out of his solemn state.

“i-i’m not sure, i mean she has to have atleast one friend...right?” jisung started thinking to himself. if he couldn’t get her to talk, maybe her friends would.

“you might be playing with fire here, is she really worth getting to know?” chenle scoffed, slightly admiring jisung’s determination.

“you never know unless you try, right?” jisung took a bite of his sandwich, there has to be a way for y/n to open up to him.

//

“i heard that park jisung has been going around, asking about you” one of y/n’s longest friends, ningning, suddenly brought up. y/n looked at her as if she was crazy, what is up with this park jisung dude?

“what does he want with me?” she rolled her eyes slightly, flipping through her history textbook.

“maybe he likes you? or maybe, he just wants to be friends. why are you so harsh to him anyway?” ningning sighed, memories of seeing her friend cry over boys now cluttering her mind.

“i don’t need any more friends. i have you, and like...sungchan” y/n shrugged, continuing to take notes as she read.

“i think you’re being unreasonable, he seems really nice. give him a chance” ningning tried persuading her friend but y/n was stubborn. she wasn’t going to get wrapped up in any unnecessary drama. maybe she was being a little rude towards jisung, she could cut it down a bit. but being anything more than classmates was not in the cards for her at all.

the following monday morning, jisung entered the classroom, skateboard attached to his hip.

“mr park, the skateboard stays at the front of the room, we’ve been through this” mr kim warned the tired boy, earning a subtle nod from him. jisung gently placed his skateboard against the wall, before making his way to his desk. he was surprised to see that y/n was already seated, scribbling down all sorts of things in her planner. jisung let out a soft cough, signalling her to raise her head to face him.

“could i uh get to my seat?” he muttered, barely loud enough for her to hear. he was more shocked to hear her response,

“oh of course, sorry jisung” he froze after she finished speaking. was this real life? was y/n really acknowledging him right now?

she scooted closer to her desk, allowing space for the tall boy. jisung quickly snapped out of his thoughts, rushing to sit down. she couldn’t help but let out a slight chuckle at his antics. it didn’t go unnoticed by jisung.

“may i have your attention? as you all know, it’s now the middle of the term. to test your knowledge, i want you guys to pair up with your desk-mates and make a presentation on a historical topic of your choice. please refer to the assessment outline for more information”

jisung was practically beaming after hearing ‘pair up with your desk-mate’. his eyes shifted to the girl next to him, who seemed quite pleased. she looked over at him, simply nodding, acknowledging their future partnership. did he wake up in some type of alternate universe?

“uh jisung, i really want to do well in this subject. so we should probably get started as soon as possible” y/n gently tapped the side of his desk, drawing in his attention.

“oh yeah, for sure. w-when did you want to start?” he stumbled over some of his words, catching her off guard, making her softly smile.

“maybe tomorrow? do you have a free period?” she continued the flow of the conversation, making jisung feel more at ease.

“uh yeah, just before lunch” he responded, watching as her face lit up.

“oh great! me too, we can work at the bleachers, barely anyone goes there anyway” she confirmed, writing down the extra details in her planner. jisung couldn’t stop staring at her, how could she do such simple tasks, yet look so beautiful?

all he had to say was, thank you mr kim.

//

y/n patiently waited for jisung to arrive, typing up random notes on her laptop. she was onto her second paragraph when she heard the huffing and puffing of someone next to her. jisung hurriedly sat down next to her, needing to take a deep breath.

“a-are you okay?” she questioned, shutting her laptop, turning her body to face the boy. jisung just nodded, holding up a finger before speaking.

“i just had chemistry with Mr Jung, he wouldn’t let us leave until we could recite the first twenty elements on the periodic table” jisung finally felt relaxed, taking out his water bottle, consuming a concerning amount of water. her mouth created a slight ‘O’ shape, grasping the situation.

“i had to sprint here, i always get stuck past Sodium” jisung continued rambling, allowing y/n to simply stare intently. she didn’t mean for it to seem creepy, but she couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle at his constant ramblings.

“a-ah sorry, we should probably get started” he shook his head, pulling out his own laptop from his bag. y/n nodded at his words, unsure of how to continue a conversation with him. it had been a while since she spoke to someone outside her inner circle of two people.

after about forty minutes of hardcore work, y/n’s eyes started wandering around. she caught sight of the boys soccer team, who were preparing for their lunch time practice. jisung’s eyes followed hers,

“you like soccer?” he blurted out, trying his best to start a conversation with her. she nodded softly, the side of her mouth curving upwards.

“yeah, i do. i’m no good at it, i just like watching. do you?” she questioned him back, eyes now focusing on him.

“of course, my parents weren’t so subtle, naming me after a famous soccer player and all” he joked, watching as the girl across from him started hysterically laughing. oh how he adored her laugh.

“oh my god, i didn’t even realise! they must have been onto something! why aren’t you on the team?” she furrowed her eyebrows, jisung bit his lip nervously,

“ah yeah, contrary to popular belief, i suck at soccer and didn’t make the team.” he sighed, feeling slightly embarrassed. y/n paused momentarily before opening her mouth,

“ah who cares! we can just watch together from the stands then” she shot him a soft smile, relieving some of the tension jisung had previously felt. the bell for lunch rang through the field, signalling that their free period had come to an end. jisung was about to pack up his things, when he noticed that y/n was still sitting, eyes glued to the players on the field.

“hey, it’s lunch now” jisung gently tapped her shoulder, snapping her out of her mini trance. y/n just nodded,

“oh i know, i was just going to watch them practice and eat my lunch here” she explained, turning her head back to the field. jisung held the strap of his bag tightly, thinking to himself momentarily. chenle can wait, he thought to himself. jisung plumped his bag to his side as he returned to his seat right next to her.

“what are you doing?” y/n questioned the boy,

“what does it look like? i’m keeping you company” he just smiled, pulling out a packet of chips, offering her some. she couldn’t hide how entertained she was, kindly accepting his offer. they continued to watch the soccer team practice, eyes scanning for the best players.

“that jeno guy is pretty good, i’m kind of jealous” jisung pouted, causing y/n to start giggling.

“am i wrong? like who wouldn’t be jealous of lee jeno? he’s got like everything! he’s athletic, and good looking and probably gets lots of chicks” jisung praised,

“wow jisung, sounds like you have a crush!” y/n teased the boy, softly nudging him. jisung froze at the sudden contact, he liked how playful you started being with him.

“don’t you? he’s kind of a catch, i thought girls would be all over him” jisung shrugged, watching as she slowly became quiet. he was startled by her reaction, feeling heat rise to his cheeks immediately.

“d-did i say something?” he muttered, unsure whether or not she was upset.

“n-no you didn’t. i mean, lee jeno was my first boyfriend, so i can say i’ve been there and done that!” y/n let out a small scoff, she noticed that jisung had now grown concerned.

“it was nothing though, we were like 12, and he dumped me over text. hasn’t spoken a word to me since though” she sighed, eyes scanning back to the boy in question. jisung was unsure of what to say next. y/n knew she had just over shared, she couldn’t help it. once she started, sometimes she couldn’t stop. she knew it would make jisung feel uncomfortable, part of her regretting it immediately. but when she saw the boy shoot her a cheeky grin, all her worries washed away.

“it’s good to hear that one girl at this school doesn’t have a crush on lee jeno” was all he said, causing her to raise an eyebrow.

“why’s that?” she curiously questioned,

“because that means i have a chance” he just smirked, head turning to focus back on the field. y/n was speechless. was he really being serious? or was this just some playful joke? she chose not to respond, feeling heat rise to her ears and cheeks. since when was park jisung such a flirt?

//

“come on, it’ll be fun” ningning whined as she sat with y/n and sungchan at the bleachers.

“yeah, you’ll get to see me play for the first time since i got on the team” sungchan begged, watching as y/n debated to herself.

“okay fine, not like i have three assignments to do that night” she sighs, giving into her friend’s peer pressure to attend friday night’s school soccer game. ningning and sungchan high-fived eachother, slightly surprised by her response. y/n’s gaze drew to the one and only park jisung, who was currently trying to do some weird skateboards tricks with chenle. she couldn’t pull her eyes away, finding it amusing whenever he made a mistake and tried to awkwardly cover it up. ningning snickered, catching onto the entire situation.

“park jisung huh? guess it’s finally time for you to put yourself back out there?” y/n snapped out of her trance, now glaring at her friend.

“n-no, what are you talking about? i wasn’t even looking at him” y/n immediately became defensive, sungchan deciding to step in.

“you totally were, in fact i’m sure you have a little bit of drool at the side of your mouth” he playfully teased, pretending to wipe off ‘drool’ from her face. y/n shoved his hands away from her, softly pouting.

“guys, he’s just a classmate. i said i wasn’t going to get involved with anyone, remember?” the annoyed girl reiterated to her friends, who weren’t buying the act at all.

“you can’t shut off your feelings, you know? it’s clear that you’re interested in him, even if it’s the tiniest bit. and you already know he’s interested in you too! why can’t you see that?” ningning sighed, feeling sorry for how hard y/n was on herself.

“because things will get messy. i’ll end up falling harder and ruin everything. it’s not going to happen again, i won’t let it” y/n looked down at her hands, gripping her water bottle tightly.

“maybe he’s different. he’s not going to be another jeno, or renjun, or donghyuck even. just keep an open mind, you have to start lowering your walls” sungchan pulled his arm around y/n shoulders, allowing her to rest against his side. ningning held her hand in y/n’s, gently stroking the back of her hand with her thumb. inside, y/n knew her friends were right. but something kept telling her that she was going to end up broken by the end of it. she really hoped that park jisung would be different. she needed him to be different.

//

y/n and jisung were halfway through their assignment, sitting next to eachother in the school library during their free period.

“damn, we are doing pretty well, way ahead of the schedule you had planned for us” jisung teased, eyes shifting to the page of scribbles, indicating the tasks for the assignment. y/n let out a scoff, pulling her planner towards her,

“don’t diss my planning okay? it’s just a rough outline!” she pierced her eyes at him, watching as he just smiled back at her. why does he keep doing that?

“you going to the soccer game tonight?” jisung nervously stammered, trying to play off as if he didn’t care too much about it. y/n only smirked at his words, placing down her pen before responding,

“may i ask why you’re asking?” she leant back in her chair, watching as jisung shifted his position so that he was directly facing her. she held her breath for a moment, not realising how close he actually was to her right now.

“because i’m going, and i was wondering if you wanted to watch it together. you know, since we are just the spectators rather than the players?” y/n wasn’t sure why she felt so...flattered, he really was unknowingly charming.

“oh yeah, i’m going, but i’ll be sitting with my friend” she tried to push the idea of her and jisung sitting alone for two hours in the cold, out of her mind. but jisung wasn’t going to back down so easily.

“oh great! i’ll bring chenle too, we can all sit together” he smiled widely before returning to type on his laptop. y/n let out a soft sigh. it doesn’t look like he will be giving up anytime soon.

//

y/n and ningning were both cozied up together on the bleachers, eyes on the lookout for sungchan. they locked eyes with the tall boy, waving at him erratically, causing him to respond in the exact same manner, gaining looks from his team mates.

“oh i sure hope they win, otherwise we’re making him buy us hot chocolate, i’m freezing!” y/n huffs, her breath now appearing infront of her.

“someone say hot chocolate?” the familiar voice rang through her ears. jisung was now seated next to her, two cups of hot chocolate in his hands. her mouth was agape, watching as the boy handed her friend one cup, then offering her the other. ningning kindly thanked him, gently nudging y/n’s arm.

“and one for my favourite desk mate” jisung snickered as she gently took the cup from him.

“hey! i thought i was your favourite desk mate!” chenle, who was on the other side of jisung, whined. jisung let out a scoff, softly shoving his friend,

“that was three years ago, things change” chenle continued to sulk, jisung not paying any attention to him. y/n couldn’t hide her amusement, taking a small sip from the warm cup of goodness.

“thanks jisung, i’ll pay you back” she offered kindly, reaching for her bag, but jisung stopped her, his hand wrapping around her wrist. y/n’s eyes shifted from his hand, to his face. jisung quickly removed his hand from her wrist, placing them into the pockets of his large coat.

“it’s on me, take it as a thankyou, for being such a great partner” a soft grin was plastered on his face. y/n just nodded, continuing to sip on the drink. the game had finally started, cheers of their fellow classmates echoed throughout the stands. sungchan played his best, assisting jeno in scoring the winning goal. the group of four in the stands, wailed at the top of their lungs, gaining the attention of those around them. y/n couldn’t stop laughing, continuously slapping jisung’s arm as she did so. jisung couldn’t stop looking at her. all he could think about was how gorgeous she looked in this light, the state of pure happiness she was currently in. it was enough for him to fall harder for her. along with her, not so gentle, slaps to his arm, jisung could swear he was in heaven.

“i-i’m sorry, jisung” she quickly calmed down, now realising how hard her slaps actually were. jisung shook his head,

“its okay, i’ll be your human punching bag any day, if it means you’ll hang out with me more” he smirked, causing her mouth to open slightly. was this guy even real? how could he come up with such cheesy lines?

“you’re an odd character, park jisung” y/n slightly shook her head in amusement, allowing her arm to brush against his as they sat closer together.

“it’s one of my best qualities” it sure was.

after the game ended, sungchan ran up to the group, jumping up and down, still pumped from his win.

“you did amazing!” y/n engulfed him into a warm hug. jisung watched the interaction unfold, part of him wishing you would be comfortable enough to embrace him like that one day.

“thanks for coming guys, i really appreciate it” sungchan smiles over to jisung and chenle who were aimlessly standing.

“anyone wanna get milkshakes or something? on me” chenle suddenly pipes up, watching as everyone’s face lit up.

“and this is why you’re my best friend” jisung pulled the other boy by his shoulders as the rest followed the pair. it was short drive in sungchan’s car, to the nearest diner. y/n was slightly shivering whilst in the car, jisung immediately noticed. he debated on whether or not to offer her his coat, but didn’t want to seem too persistent about it. as y/n stepped out of the car, she felt strong shiver throughout her body. jisung pushes his prior worries aside, immediately slipping off his coat, draping it around her shoulders.

“o-oh you don’t have to do this, jisung” she tried to decline, but the boy refused.

“nope, you’re cold and i’m already warm in this hoodie, just accept it” he convinced her, not taking no for an answer. as the five of them stepped into the diner, ningning made a beeline for her favourite booth near the back window. she slid herself into the booth, with sungchan next to her. y/n slide herself in the seat across from her friends, jisung quickly shoving in right next to her, chenle on his other side, once again. ningning gave y/n a playful smirk, eyes scanning over the overly large coat she had on. y/n raised her eyebrows, eyes straining, warning her friend to not mention it.

y/n’s eyes shifted over to jisung, who had started a conversation with sungchan and chenle about some new video game that was coming out soon. she watched as he threw his head back in laughter, continuing to argue with chenle about who was the best avatar in the game.  she then noticed how he balled hands into fists, gently rubbing them against the surface of his pants. he would occasionally blow on them, trying his best to get some warmth. she felt guilty for taking his coat, but knew he would do anything in his power to have her wear it. so she swallowed some of her pride, reaching for his hands. jisung froze at the sudden contact, trying to not make it obvious to the rest that he was now disengaged from the conversation entirely.

“w-what are you doing?” he muttered, moving closer to y/n, which made her slightly blush. she pulled his hands into her lap, wrapping them in the excess material of the oversized coat.

“they looked cold, i’ll warm them up for you” she softly smiled, and jisung swore his heart was about to burst out of his chest. was this real life? it couldn’t be, it had to be some crazy dream he was having.

y/n noticed the sudden shyness from jisung, heat now rising to his ears. she would be lying if she said she didn’t find him adorable. her heart racing as the close contact.

the rest of the night was spent chatting away between the five of them. from how lee donghyuck got suspended for putting shaving cream in the soccer coach’s cap, to the dreaded mid term exams that were approaching. y/n wished she had participated more in the discussions, but her thoughts were too preoccupied by park jisung. his hands still rested in hers, her fingers slowly beginning to smooth over his own, making his heart skip beats. he felt himself lean in closer to her as the night went on, practically crushing her against the window, but she didn’t mind.

“we should get heading home now, our parents are probably wondering where we are” ningning pouted as they all raised from their seats. jisung didn’t want to pull his hands away from y/n’s, making the bold decision to intertwine their fingers as they left the diner. y/n’s eyes widened at his actions as he smiled down at her. they sat in the back of sungchan’s car, as y/n felt her head lean on jisung’s shoulder, her hand still holding his. her eyes slowly became drowsy, ready to fall asleep.

“you two are really cute” ningning whispered, not knowing that y/n was listening intently,

“t-thanks” jisung whispered back, trying his best to hide how happy he was by the comment.

“so are you confessing?” chenle snickered, causing jisung to roll his eyes,

“i want to take things slow. i want her to like me back first” jisung sighed, reaching to brush some of y/n’s hair from her face.

“oh trust me dude, she likes you. she just won’t admit it yet” sungchan smiled to himself, happy to see y/n finally start opening up again.

“good, cause i’m in it for the long run” oh park jisung, who wouldn’t fall for him?

//

when jisung got to school the following monday, he saw y/n standing at the front gates, swaying slightly. she was wearing black stockings with a plaid skirt and a creme coloured sweater vest. but she was wearing something else that caught his eye.

“goodmorning jisung” she greeted the boy, fast paced walking to meet him. jisung smiled softly at her, pulling his skateboard to his side.

“goodmorning, y-you’re wearing my coat” he pointed out, causing her to freeze slightly.

“o-oh yeah, do you mind? it’s been pretty chilly lately” she wrapped herself tighter, eyes facing the ground. jisung felt a swarm of butterflies emerge in his stomach, she really had that effect on him.

“it’s totally okay, you suit it better than i do” he softly chuckled, beginning to walk alongside her, arms brushing against eachother.

“you gotta stop saying stuff like that” y/n sighs, waltzing through the school hallway, to their history classroom.

“and why should i?” jisung playfully teased, tugging on her sleeve, turning her to face him. her hands instantly went to his chest, not realising how close he had pulled her to him.

“b-because” she spoke barely above a whisper. jisung’s eyebrows furrowed at her,

“because it’s making me feel things” was all she said as she pulled away from him, rushing to her desk. jisung couldn’t help but admire her awkwardness. he was slowly getting there, she had partially admitted to having feelings for him. but he knew she wasn’t going to fully admit it anytime soon. he had to make the first big move...but he needed some outside help.

//

“is there a reason why we are hiding from y/n right now?” ningning whispered, face to face with jisung.

“i want to confess to her” he blurted out, ningning’s eyes widening in shock.

“you want to confess to her?” she repeated, mind still trying to wrap around the situation.

“uh yes? is it so hard to believe? i thought i made it pretty obvio-“

“no no, i know you like her. it’s just that, she’s never EVER had a boy confess to her before. it’s always been her making the moves” ningning explains, jisung’s mouth pressing into a firm line.

“she’s not used to this type of attention. like where the guy is genuinely interested in her as a person, and the things she likes. she’s used to always getting to know the guy, doing everything in her power to gain some type of feelings for her. then she ends up hurt after she realises that she fell harder than they did for her” jisung would be lying if this wasn’t hurting him. how could they do that to someone as caring and loving as y/n?

“how do i show her that i’m different?” jisung stammers, nerves slowly taking over. ningning just giggles,

“you’re already half way there. trust me, she knows inside that you’re not like the rest. you just have to hit it out of the park with a bomb ass confession! here’s what i’m thinking...” ningning continues to whisper to the boy, jisung stringing along to every word. operation confession for y/n was underway.

//

“hey, are we ready to hand in our assignment?” y/n approached jisung just before class. he responded with an affirmative nod, pulling out the ten page report from his backpack. her eyes widened at his efforts, admiring how prettily he presented the report.

“j-jisung” she stuttered, flipping through each page.

“i had some spare time last night, don’t mention it” he winks at her as she felt heat rise to her cheeks. she quickly moved to her seat next to him, trying her best to hide her face with her hair. but jisung noticed, smirking to himself. could she be any more adorable?

“there’s another soccer game on friday! did you want to sit together again?” jisung turned over the the girl next to him, catching her completely off guard. y/n looked over to jisung, his face completely softened, his eyes practically begging her to say yes.

“y-yeah i’d like that” she nodded, silently cheering that she would get to spend another night with park jisung. the plan was now in motion.

//

jisung was standing under the bleachers, awaiting y/n’s arrival. chenle approached him, giving him a slight pat on the back.

“you ready, buddy?” chenle whispered, a cheery expression on his face. jisung slowly nodded.

“yeah, the worst she could say is no” jisung tried his best not to psych himself out, reviewing his confession in his head.

“they’re here” chenle announces, eyes drifting to y/n and ningning. jisung took a deep breath, moving slowly towards the pair of girls. y/n was the first to notice him, shooting him a small smile, meeting him halfway.

“good evening ladies” chenle greets, making ningning giggle.

“oh please, we are barely ladies” she sighs, stepping past groups of people to find a seat for the four of them. chenle followed her in suit, with y/n and jisung straggling behind. jisung nudged y/n’s shoulder, giving her a small nod. she returned the gesture, feeling slightly awkward. but she pushed it aside, happy to spend another evening with jisung. she noticed that throughout the game, jisung’s leg kept bouncing up and down. she sensed he was nervous about something, it was either that or he was just really cold.

“do you want my coat to cover your legs? i brought an extra blanket with me” y/n whispered to jisung, causing him to halt his movements. he looks over at her, as she was halfway to taking off her coat.

“why don’t we just share the blanket?” jisung slyly comments. now it was her turn to freeze. she looked over at him, lips pressed in a firm line. as she placed her coat back on, and pulled out the blanket, jisung could feel his heart pumping faster than it had ever before. this was a good sign, right? she must like him back...right?

y/n gently placed the half the blanket over his knees, moving herself closer to him to gather warmth. she didn’t say much to him after, too focused on the game they were watching. but the position they were in right now, was all that was on jisung’s mind.

the game ended with a close win by sungchan’s team. although everyone was celebrating, it was noticeable that sungchan was not proud of how he played.

“dude don’t beat yourself up about it, it happens to the best of us” chenle tried to comfort. sungchan just nodded, not wanting to talk much about it.

“okay grumpy pants, let’s go get some food” ningning pulls the sulky not by the arm, chenle on the other side of him, doing the same.

“you two coming?” ningning calls from behind her. before y/n could answer, jisung reaches for her wrist, stopping her in her path.

“c-could i steal y/n for the night?” jisung didn’t let go of her wrist, watching as their three friends all had identical smirks.

“sure thing, see you two tomorrow” chenle winks, rushing off with the others. y/n’s face contorted into utter confusion. the feeling of jisung’s warm hand wrapped around her wrist made her nervous. he let out a short cough before letting go.

“what did you want to talk about?” she questioned, allowing multiple students to pass by her. jisung didn’t respond immediately, pulling her to sit at the bleachers again. he reaches into his coat pocket, pulling out a pink folded piece of paper. her eyes were immediately drawn to it, but part of her was still wondering what this entire debacle was about.

“i-i don’t want you to read this yet. well until i tell you what i have to say” jisung mutters, hands becoming sweaty. this was such a different jisung to watch y/n was used to seeing. he always made witty jokes out of any situation, and was barely ever...nervous.

“go on” she urged, eyes still glued to that piece of paper. jisung cleared just throat, eyes finally meeting those of the girls across from him.

“i have a crush on you” those words had y/n stunned. her mouth became agape, no proper words able to be formed. jisung decided to continue,

“i know that you aren’t looking for a relationship or anything. and you’ve been hurt before. but i just had to tell you. i couldn’t keep it inside anymore” he finally admitted, shoulders now slouching. his eyes wavered from hers at times, but they were now drawn to his hands. y/n wasn’t sure how to respond. this was her first ever confession. the first person to actually have interest in her first. she wasn’t used to this at all. jisung was a nice guy, she knew he was. but was he the guy for her? or was she just struck with the idea of him confessing first? did she even really like him that way?

jisung noticed the mini debate occurring in the girl’s mind, part of his ego becoming bruised. y/n wanted to say something articulate back to him but she couldn’t find the right words.

“uh t-thanks for telling me, jisung. it must have taken a lot of courage” that wasn’t the way he expected things to go, but he continued listening to her.

“but are you really sure you like me? like really sure?” y/n questioned, the idea still not wrapping around her head. jisung was in disbelief, was he not obvious enough?

“i’m more than sure. i’ve liked you ever since i’ve met you” he mutters, feeling completely dejected.

“t-that’s not possible. you didn’t even know me then” she shook her head, eyes drifting to the hurt expression that was now on jisung’s face.

“i didn’t need to. you were so beautiful to me. i had to get to know you. i thought i made it pretty obvious that i liked you. but i guess i should have done a bit more, maybe save myself the embarrassment” he mumbled the last part to himself. his words striking her right in the heart. she didn’t want to come off as rude or unappreciative. but how was she meant to know this wasn’t some kind of joke, or if his feelings were true.

“is it really that hard to believe that i like you?” jisung tried his best to remain calm, but he wanted nothing more than to dig a hole and lay in it.

“yes. it is. because guys don’t confess to me. they just don’t. they don’t fall for me first” she continued to tell herself, watching as jisung’s face flatten.

“you can keep thinking that. but it’s not true. i’m living proof. i really thought you liked me too. i must have misread this entire thing” hearing those words stung her heart. she did like jisung. maybe not as much as he claimed he liked her, but she definitely had feelings towards him as more than a friend. but she didn’t feel ready, for any of this.

“jisung, it’s not like that. i like you too, i just don’t think i’m ready” she whispers, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. jisung could barely look at her, an overwhelming wave of embarrassment washing over him.

“when will you ever be ready? because by the looks of it, it seems like you never will be” jisung shook his head, forcefully brushing through strands of his hair. y/n moved closer to the boy, placing her hand onto his shoulder. she felt him tense at the contact, his eyes finally coming back up to meet hers again.

“i-i don’t know when i’ll be ready. i just need some time to think about it” she sighed, not wanting to rub more salt into the wound. jisung only nodded in response. there was no use trying to convince her any further. jisung accepted her reasons, even though he held resentment towards her for initially rejecting him.

“i’ll give you some space. let me walk you home atleast” jisung stood up, offering his hand to her. y/n cautiously took his hand in hers, slowly walking alongside the tall boy.

silence filled the air on their walk home. the only sounds being heard were the hoots of owls and screeching of cicadas. jisung had let go of her hand along the way, which pained her to admit, she missed his touch immediately. as they made it to her front door step, jisung was in a rush to get home, ready to sob his eyes out. but y/n stopped him.

“i understand that you’re upset. trust me, i know how it feels. but i hope you can see where i’m coming from” she mumbled as jisung nodded along to her words.

“it’s fine, i get it. i’ll just give this to you now” he pulled out the folded paper from earlier, handing it over to her.

“if you still don’t believe i like you, that should give you a sign about how much i actually do. have a nice night” he shrugged at her, turning his back to walk away. she watched as he left her driveway, head hung low. she shook the thoughts out of her mind, opening the door to her house. she didn’t bother looking back at jisung, closing the door behind her. but just as she entered her home, jisung’s gaze lingered on her. how could she have hurt him so much in such a short amount of time, yet he still felt the exact same about her?

park jisung, you are a fool. he thought to himself on his way home. how would he move on from this?

//

after the long night she had, y/n wanted nothing more but to sleep her problems away. but as she held onto the pink paper in her hands, she knew she wasn’t getting any sleep. she seated herself on her bed, carefully unfolding the paper, her heart racing.

“dear y/n,

if you’re reading this, i’ve just confessed to you. and you’ve most likely rejected me. i understand why you did it, i really do. i just couldn’t hold it inside any longer. i know you aren’t looking for anything serious at the moment. but i want you to know that i’ll be waiting for you. i hope that one day you realise how amazing you really are, and how i would be the luckiest guy in the world, to have you reciprocate my feelings. i honestly feel like you’re out of my league. i mean, you’re so confident in yourself. and you never let people bring you down. you’re so optimistic about such trivial things, it’s started to rub off on me a bit. i appreciate the sweet moments we’ve had together, and i hope you do as well. i don’t want to lost hope, that’s something you’ve taught me. you’re now nearing the end of this awfully structured letter, and i just want to say, that you deserve the world, and i can be the guy to give it to you. if you just give me a chance.

- park jisung (you already know who it’s from i just wanted to sound formal okay bye)”

y/n suddenly felt tears stream down her cheeks. for once in her life, she felt truly appreciated and cared for in return. of course she could see herself with jisung. it wasn’t a hard decision for her to make up her mind about it. but her constant doubts always held her back. it wasn’t fair to jisung at all, to keep him stringing along. she needed to make a decision, quick. there was no way she was going to hurt this boy.

//

the following monday morning, jisung patiently awaited y/n’s arrival in class. he nibbled on the side of his lip, tapping his pen rapidly on the desk. other students asked him to stop, as they were getting annoyed at the sounds but he couldn’t help it. he was praying she read the letter and didn’t just discard of it.

just as he was slipping into his own thoughts, he felt a sudden slam of books on the desk. his eyes met y/n’s as she sat down next to him. his quickly broke eye contact, flipping through his textbook as if he was studying. but she caught on to the boy’s antics, tapping him on the shoulder. jisung froze at the contact, looking over at the girl, who was still wearing his jacket.

“this is for you” she pulled out a small jar of origami hearts, sliding it over to his side of the desk. she felt heat rise to her ears, slightly embarrassed at the sweet gesture. jisung was practically speechless, his heart beating at a rapid pace.

“wow thank you, i love it” he gave her a gentle smile, eyes suddenly disappearing. she only nodded back, unsure of how to continue.

“i read your letter” she got to the point, jisung’s attention fully attended to her.

“i didn’t realise you felt so deeply about me, jisung. i thought you just had a silly crush, maybe that’s why i thought it would be easy to push you away. but you never let it go. and i’ve never had anyone do that for me before. so thank you” y/n barely whispers, feeling her palms begin to sweat. which was only something that happened when she was extremely nervous.

“what i’m saying is. you’re not like the guys i’ve liked before. you like me for me, and you genuinely want to be with me. so would you consider going on a date with me to the movies this weekend?” she cautiously suggested, watching as the boy’s face lit up in utter glee. he wanted nothing more but to pull her close and swing her around as he hugged her. but they were still in class, he needed to be tame...for now.

“i would freaking love that” he chuckled, causing you to smirk at his response.

“i’m glad you accepted my confession, i would have given you the silent treatment if i really tried” jisung pouted, making a fake angry expression, crossing his arms. she gently slapped his shoulder, laughing at the boy’s ridiculous antics. if this what it was like dating park jisung, then bring it on.

//

[ three months later ]

“come on! sungchan shoot!!” ningning’s voice echoed through the stands, the whole crowd geared up for the school’s soccer grand final. y/n and jisung were bundled up together, sipping on their hot chocolates, silently praying for that grand final win. there was only a minute left, jeno passed to sungchan and...he scores!

all the students from their school

jumped up, screaming endless cheers at the team. ningning waved her mini flag she made with sungchan’s face on it, as y/n and jisung hollered with the crowd.

“you did so great out there” y/n complimented her friend, like many times before, pulling him into an embrace. she saw how jisung slightly pouted, missing her warm touch. she slipped perfectly back to his side, his arm instantly wrapped around her waist as the crew made their way to the diner. jisung held y/n back, offering to meet the rest later on. y/n was yet again confused, following her boyfriend’s steps to sit on the bleachers.

“what’s up, sung? everything okay?” she pouts, watching as jisung nervously looks up at her.

“i love you” he blurts out, hands covering his mouth once he does. her eyes widen, not expecting those three words to leave his mouth at all. she pressed her lips into a firm line, her mind comprehending the situation. jisung was left worried, trying to read her expressions as best he could. he hoped he didn’t scare her away, it would completely ruin him.

“you’re just in luck” jisung’s head whipped up and met her. “because i love you too” y/n whispered, inching closer to the boy. his hands gently stroked her cheek, it was slightly cold but she didn’t mind. her lips fanned over his, ready to press them together. as she did so, jisung smiled widely into the kiss, hands coming to squish her cheeks together. it made both of them giggle for a bit, breaking the kiss momentarily. before jisung pulled her back in.

y/n soon realised that she didn’t need to live in fear of rejection any longer. because jisung gave her every ounce of reassurance she needed. the boys from her past slowly fizzled away from her memory, jisung now taking place as the one boy who truly loved her.

a/n: pls let me know what you all think!! 

[clumsyclifford]

OKAY. how about "This wasn’t meant to be a date, but we’ve had such a good time and now it’s 2 a.m. and I should really go home…" with ur teacher alex/ambiguous office job jack? (or any version of jalex) (we just love jalex in this house)

well hello, she said casually, nine months later. thank you for the excellent prompt, sorry it took me so long to get to it, but you can thank yourself for that too considering going to ssf is what inspired me to finally write this one. bellawritess clumsyclifford pictures is proud to present: the tshirt jalex meet-cute :)

read here on ao3

-

Later, Alex learns that the boy at the barricade who’d elbowed Alex in the face trying to snatch the thrown guitar pick out of the air is named Jack.

“I’m so sorry,” Jack says for the millionth time, even though Alex has laughed it off every other time. He laughs it off this time, too.

“Seriously, it’s fine. And hey, you caught it.”

Jack holds up the guitar pick, triumphant. “I did catch it,” he says. The blink-182 logo flashes its dead and frozen smile at Alex. Alex finds himself smiling back, though not so much at the pick.

The leaving crowd parts around the two of them. Headlights flood the night, filling the street before them with light and noise. There’s a line of cars backed up further than Alex cares to imagine. Those at the front must have left the show significantly before the set was over. Quitters.

“What I didn’t catch was your name,” Jack adds. His lips quirk, like he’s proud of such a smooth line.

“Alex,” says Alex. “We should probably get out of everyone’s way. Are you waiting for someone, or…?”

“No, no, I came alone.”

“Yeah, me too. Was supposed to have a friend but he bailed on me last-minute.”

“Seriously? Bailed on a blink concert?”

“I know, right?” Alex grins. “Eh, whatever. If he’d been here you probably never would have elbowed me in the face and then we’d never have met.”

“But I would’ve never elbowed you in the face,” Jack says. “Don’t you think you’d have preferred that?”

“Not if it means we’d have never met.”

Jack’s smile slowly grows. “Fair enough. Did you know there’s a 24-hour diner literally five minutes from here?”

“Oh, man, I like the way you think,” Alex says, shoving his hands into his pockets to protect them from the cool late-night breeze. “I didn’t want to sit in this traffic anyway.”

“And I don’t blame you.”

“Well, lead the way,” Alex says, nodding down the sidewalk, and he falls into step with Jack as they both start to walk.

-

The Tastee Diner is charmingly diner-y — neon lights, stools at the bar, the whole nine yards — and, more attractively, it’s mostly empty at this hour. It’s past midnight, later even than Alex’s usual bedtime, but between the buzz from the concert and Jack the attractive stranger across from him, he’s not really feeling tired. If he’s going to flush his sleep schedule down the drain, a post-concert Friday night seems like the best time to do it.

And Jack is really cute. So that helps.

“Breakfast,” Alex says reverently when they’re seated. “Oh my God, a fucking giant waffle.”

“Wow, everything you say makes me like you more,” Jack says, leaning his elbows on the table. Alex glances over the top of his menu but Jack’s eyes are focused on his own menu on the tabletop. He’s smiling a little. So is Alex.

“It’s a giant waffle, Jack! How the fuck do I say no to that?”

“You don’t. This table is pro-giant waffle. At the exclusion of anything else.”

“You’re damn right it is,” Alex says. “Do we also happen to be pro-chocolate milkshake?”

“We’re pro-vanilla milkshake.”

“Ew, seriously?”

Jack rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I know, how can I like vanilla when chocolate is right there—”

“Yeah, how can you?” Alex reaches over the table and covers Jack’s hand with his own. Their eyes meet. Very seriously, Alex says, “How do you look at yourself in the mirror, you monster?”

A beat. Jack chews his lip, clearly trying not to smile. “With great difficulty,” he says. He’s humoring Alex, but sincerity sparkles in his deep brown eyes. His earnest gaze holds Alex’s and he doesn’t pull his hand away. After a moment, Alex does.

“Well, if I looked like you I’d never stop looking in the mirror,” he says instead, and brings his gaze back to the menu. A laugh escapes Jack.

“You can’t turn it off, can you?”

“Turn what off?”

“Your flirty brain-to-mouth pipeline?”

“I could,” Alex says breezily. “I choose not to.” It feels like a subtle rejection, a quiet dig, but it’s hard to be sure. Jack’s smirk seems to suggest otherwise.

The waitress comes by to take their orders of two giant waffles and two milkshakes — chocolate for Alex, vanilla for Jack, though Alex is sure to give Jack a judgmental look as he’s ordering. When she goes, Jack laces his fingers together and leans back in the booth. “So,” he says. “Your name is Alex, you’ve got fantastic music taste, and you seem to be more or less my age, but that’s about all I know about you. Are you from around here? What do you do? Likes, dislikes?”

“Are you trying to build me a dating profile?”

“That wouldn’t be very opportunistic of me, would it?” Jack smiles innocently. Alex’s heart gives a little leap. “I’m trying to get to know you. You know, like any normal stranger would if they found themself at a diner with another stranger.”

That’s fair. They are effectively strangers, although Alex can think of a shorter word to describe what they’re doing right now. He glances around at the jukebox-esque machine bolted to the wall next to their booth, at the empty swivel stools at the bar, at the marble tabletop where Jack is absently tapping his fingers. The decor of the diner is very classic, and he and Jack, both dressed in blink merch and black jeans like the perpetual emo teens they’re no doubt trying to emulate, stick out like sore thumbs.

However unintentional, it sure as hell feels like a date to him.

“I’m from Baltimore,” he starts. Jack lights up.

“No shit! Me too.”

“Really? Whereabouts?”

“Well, I work by the harbor.”

“No shit, I work in Highlandtown,” Alex says excitedly. “Highlandtown Middle. I’m a teacher.”

Jack whistles lowly. “That’s fucking awesome. What do you teach?”

“Music,” Alex says, and Jack groans, although he’s smiling as his hands move to cover his face.

“Of course you do,” he says.

Alex tilts his head. “What, are you not a fan of music teachers? That’s insane.”

“No, no, it’s not that, it’s just.” Jack laughs. “Of course the hot guy I meet at a blink-182 concert is a middle school music teacher. I feel like God is punishing me for refusing to play anything but bad drums in middle school band.”

Alex also laughs. Being called a hot guy by a hot guy is making his stomach do gymnastics. He’s too old for his stomach to be doing things like that, but his stomach clearly doesn’t care. “Well, if I’d been your teacher, trust me, you’d have been playing solidly mediocre drums. But I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Jack’s hands fall to his lap. “I’m sure I’ll get over it,” he says with a slanted smile.

Alex swallows and grins. “So did you look up surrounding diners before you came, or are you just…inexplicably familiar with Silver Spring geography?”

“I come to a lot of concerts here,” Jack says, nodding in the general direction of the venue they’d just vacated. “Venue’s awesome.”

“Yeah, it really is. Honestly, I’m still amazed that you caught that pick.”

“I have a lot of practice. From aforementioned many concerts.”

“I can see that.”

“Trust me, it’s a very specific skill. I’ve got awful hand-eye coordination,” Jack says with a chuckle. “My dream of being the youngest Oriole inducted into the Hall of Fame was crushed at a young age.”

Fizzy champagne fills Alex’s chest. He can’t stop smiling. “Fuck yes, you’re an Orioles fan?”

“That’s my team,” Jack says, looking excited. Possibly at the prospect of meeting another person who’s equally interested in both music and baseball. That’s why Alex is excited, anyway.

“It’s my team,” he says enthusiastically. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, they fucking suck—”

“Oh, no, yeah, they’re the worst—”

“But I’d take a bullet for them. I happily go down with ‘em every year.”

“Yeah, they’re my boys,” Jack agrees. “Here’s hoping this season is better than every single other one.”

“Yeah, all my fingers are crossed, but between you and me I don’t have a lot of faith.”

Jack shrugs and nods. “It’s good for my ego to be so loyal to such a bad team. Keeps me humble.”

“That’s the best attitude I’ve ever heard,” Alex says, and Jack’s smile is so radiant Alex could swear he can feel the glare off the shiny marble tabletop.

-

“Between ‘All The Small Things’ and ‘Going Away To College’ how the fuck am I going to choose ‘Small Things’?”

“Yeah, but it’s such a classic! ‘College’ is, like, emo and…emo.”

“No more emo than ‘I Miss You’ —”

“That one is a classic—”

“I’m not saying it’s not, I’m just saying ‘College’ is their best song and it deserves its spotlight.”

“That’s ‘Feeling This’ erasure and you know it.”

“Besides ‘Feeling This,’ but they always play ‘Feeling This.’ I stand by what I said. I’d swap ‘Small Things’ for ‘College.’ Deal with it.” Alex tongues his milkshake straw into his mouth. “Your turn.”

Jack glares at him for another long moment, like he has to properly make his point about it. “Fine,” he finally huffs. His gaze shifts sideways, off into the distance like he’s thinking, and he swirls his own straw around his milkshake cup. Alex can kind of see his reflection in it. While Jack is thinking, Alex quickly checks his phone.

(21:47) Rian Dawson: How’s the concert? Fuckin bummed I couldn’t make it :/

(21:48) Rian Dawson: Hope you’re having a good time anyway. Text me whenever you get home so I know you didn’t die or get trampled by a mosh pit or whatever the case may be.

Alex smiles and turns off his phone again.

“I feel like I can’t choose a song off Enema now that you did,” Jack mumbles.

“You can,” Alex says. “It would just be kind of a lot of Enema.”

“No, but Enema is a legendary album. I’d go to a show that was literally just all of Enema.”

“Why were you complaining about ‘College’ then!”

“I’m not complaining about ‘College’ itself, I just would never trade it for ‘Small Things’!”

Alex scoffs. “They play ‘Small Things’ all the time. I’ve never seen ‘College’ live. I’d literally kill.”

“Oh my God, I know what I’d do,” Jack says. “‘Shut Up’ instead of ‘Down.’ That’s the only thing that could make this set list more perfect.”

“Ohhh,” Alex says, “that would be fucking sick. Imagine two thousand people just shouting ‘shut the fuck up, she said’ at the top of their lungs.”

“I cannot think of anything cooler than that.”

Alex hums thoughtfully. “So you went with Take Off Your Pants instead of Enema in the end.”

“Alright, don’t get it twisted. If I could add the entirety of Enema to the set list, I would. But if I only get one song, it has to be ‘Shut Up.’ More Enema is never a bad thing.”

“Why wouldn’t you trade ‘College’ for ‘Down’ then?”

“Because that was your set list move, and this is mine,” Jack says. He slaps the table. “Yeah. This is the answer. Someone get Mark Hoppus on the line, stat. I have to tell him I’ve figured out the formula for the perfect set list.”

“‘Shut Up’ live would be awesome,” Alex concedes. “Good move.”

“What can I say, I have extremely good taste,” Jack says airily.

Alex snorts. “Okay, Vanilla Milkshake.”

“You’re just afraid to taste it because you know deep down that it will be better than your chocolate one,” Jack says, pointing his straw accusingly at Alex. Drops of milkshake fall onto the table. Alex sweeps a napkin over the mess.

“You had an advantage over me, though,” he observes. “You said your favorite blink song is ‘Feeling This,’ which was already on the set list. My favorite song wasn’t, so my hands were kind of tied.”

“It’s among my favorite blink songs,” Jack says. “I have many. Most of which are set list staples, yeah. But that’s on you for only having one favorite song.”

“Wait, what? You can’t have many favorites, that defeats the whole point of having a favorite.”

“I can have multiple favorites, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“No way, man. You only get to have one favorite. You can have second-favorites or close favorites but there’s always one that’s better than the rest.”

“Sorry to burst you bubble, Al, but I have more than one favorite blink song,” Jack says, shrugging. “I also have more than one favorite color and more than one favorite food and more than one favorite song.”

Alex shakes his head through Jack’s speech. “I reject this out of hand.”

“You can’t.”

“Well, Clearly Enema is your favorite blink album.”

“Tied with Take Off.”

“Seriously?” Alex narrows his eyes. “Come on, there must be one thing you have just one favorite of.”

“Yeah, there is,” Jack says. “My favorite movie is Home Alone. No other movie comes anywhere close.”

Of course it is. Alex grins and inclines his head in accordance. “That…is extremely good taste.”

“Thank you,” Jack says graciously, and slurps loudly from his milkshake.

-

The next time Alex checks his phone, his brain takes a moment to catch up. “Holy shit, it’s already one a.m.?”

“Oh shit,” Jack says, checking his phone as well. “Time flies when you’re having fun.”

That adage has never felt more true. Slowly working through giant waffles and milkshakes while exchanging questions and random conversational topics with Jack has been the most fun Alex has had in a long time. Diners, he muses. There’s something about diners. Time feels frozen within these walls, and Alex kind of wants to stay in the time bubble forever, laughing with Jack until the sun comes up.

He could do it. Tomorrow’s a Saturday. Nobody works on Saturday, not even Jack at his “boring office job” (his words).

But he knows there’s a reason that nothing gold can stay. It wouldn’t be valuable if it lasted forever. The night will crystallize as something special in Alex’s memory, but it can’t do that until it ends. And it has to end eventually.

“We should probably go,” Alex says reluctantly. Jack nods once.

“Yeah,” he says. He signals for the check and looks back at Alex. “My treat.”

“Uh, no way. I’m paying.”

“Nope, not happening. I will elbow you in the face again if I have to. I’m paying this check.”

“Jack—” Alex wavers. Jack looks so insistent, eyebrows raised like he’s daring Alex to argue, and there’s nothing to do but smile. “Okay. If you insist. We’ll call it even for you assaulting me earlier.”

“Exactly,” Jack says, and he happily accepts the check when the waitress hands it to him.

“Did you guys get everything you need?” she asks the two of them.

Alex glances at Jack, but Jack’s scanning the check. “Pretty much, yeah,” he tells the waitress. She leaves them with the check, and they vacate their table to go pay it at the front.

Alex wonders what someone might think if they saw this table. Whether anyone could even begin to illustrate the story of the night using only two empty milkshake cups and two plates that formerly held waffles. It would be impossible. Not even Sherlock Holmes could work this one out.

Alex smiles. They’re a fossil in amber, preserved in memory. Even if it turns out not to be a date, Alex knows he’ll look back on tonight fondly, and he can count on this exact same smile every time he does.

Jack finishes paying and turns to face Alex. One arm outstretched, he says, “Shall we?”

Alex links their arms. “After you, good sir.”

They’re laughing as they leave in a glow of neon light.

-

“This is me,” Alex says, gesturing half-heartedly at his car. They both stop short behind it.

“Ah,” Jack says, nodding. “So I guess this is where I leave you.”

Alex swallows. “I’m glad you elbowed me in the face,” he admits, which sounds strange to say out of the blue. “I had a good time tonight.”

“What, at the concert?”

Jack is obviously teasing, but Alex doesn’t mind being more clear. “Actually, I think I had more fun after the concert,” he says, smiling a little. “You’re good company, JB.”

Jack smiles, and if Alex isn’t mistaken, he’s also blushing. “Same to you,” he says. “Despite your wrong opinions about the set list.”

“I hate sounding like a cliché,” Alex says, ruffling a hand through his hair. Jack cocks his head. “But, um, I’d like to see you again. If that’s okay.”

“So okay,” Jack says. “And totally plausible, considering we apparently live within twenty minutes of each other.”

“True,” Alex says. “The universe really wanted us to meet, I guess.”

“Thank you, Universe, for putting Alex in harm’s way,” Jack says solemnly, looking upwards. Alex laughs. “Can I have your number?”

“Yeah, yes, of course.”

Alex recites his phone number for Jack to enter into his contacts. “I promise I’ll call,” Jack says. His gaze flits around Alex’s face like it can’t find a good place to land. He drags his index finger diagonally over his chest. “Cross my heart and everything.”

“I have to ask,” Alex says, shifting on his feet. “Were you— was this supposed to be a date?” He hesitates; maybe that’s the wrong question. “Was it a date?”

“For the sake of anniversaries, let’s say yes,” Jack says. Immediately his face puckers in regret. “Pretend I didn’t say that. I’m— my brain gets ahead of me.”

“No, it’s all good.” It’s more than good; there’s a horde of butterflies in Alex’s ribcage that won’t fucking quit, not now that he knows Jack is thinking of anniversaries when this is only maybe their first date. A person who is not only anticipating a future for them but preparing to celebrate it. So far, so fucking good. “You’re a practical thinker. I can appreciate that.”

“And I appreciate that you aren’t deleting your number from my phone even after I just said that to you,” Jack says, grinning. His grin melts away when he sighs. “I should go. It’s late.”

“Yeah,” Alex echoes. “Late.”

“Please drive safe,” Jack says seriously. “If I’m the last person to see you before you die, that’ll make me look really bad.”

Alex laughs. He likes that Jack keeps making him laugh. His friends make him laugh, too, but Jack makes him laugh in a different way, like he can’t stop himself. Like the delight refuses to stay trapped.

“I promise to drive safe,” he vows. “I owe you a date. I would hate to lose the chance to impress you.”

“Oh, wait, that reminds me.” Jack reaches into his pocket and presses something into Alex’s hand. It’s the guitar pick, warm from Jack’s pocket. “You’ll probably use it more than me,” Jack explains, ducking his head. “You know, being a music teacher and all.”

“Oh,” Alex breathes, flipping the pick in his palm. “That’s, um…thank you. Thanks. I’m…”

“Yeah,” Jack says, licking his lips. “Of course. Um, okay, now I really should go. But like I said, I’ll call.”

Alex nods, still staring at the guitar pick in his hand. His head snaps up and he breaks from whatever trance he’d fallen into. “I’m counting on it,” he says, stepping closer to Jack. He hears Jack inhale as he leans closer, brushing his lips to Jack’s cheek.

When Jack speaks, it’s a hoarse whisper. “I had a good time too, you know.”

Alex leans away and starts walking backwards to the driver-side door. “Good,” he says, smiling warmly. He’s not really trying to smile so warmly but he can’t help it. “Get home safe, Jack.”

“Yeah,” Jack says. “You too, Alex.”

[karasunology]

⸙ ˚₊ ➷ IWAIZUMI HAJIME BEING A DAD HEADCANONS! ❞

✎ . . . Herrroooo! 👋🏽 May I request a Baby daddy head canon (The “as dads” head canons lol) please? For Iwaizumi and Nishinoya please and thank you 💞 Love your writing too!!!

❝ ― submitted by @ nonnie <3 ❞

✎ . . . jae idk whether anyone has requested this but is it okay if i request for some iwaizumi and ushi dad HCs 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 ur HCs make me SO soft and tbh i just wanna live in ur imaginations 😢💞

❝ ― submitted by @b0kuto <3 ❞

✎ . . . since you did oikawa as a dad, what about my boyfie iwachann?? and maybe how their kids will interact with each other, thank you if you ever consider💛

❝ ― submitted by @ nonnie <3 ❞

-ˏˋ ➶ character(s) ━ iwaizumi hajime <3

[ trigger warnings ━ slight manga spoilers !! ]

✎ . . . DAD HEADCANONS.

[ SUGAWARA KOUSHI & OIKAWA VERSION. ] [ BOKUTO KOUTARO VERSION. ] [ MIYA ATSUMU VERSION. ] [ KUROO TETSUROU & KOZUME KENMA HEADCANONS. ]

-ˏˋ playing soleil's tape ˊˎ-

[ 📼 ] . . . happy 900 followers and happy birthday lizzie !! @kaidasen , i have two other iwaizumi hcs in my inbox and one being another dad req but not just general hcs and phew i'm tired

IWAIZUMI HAJIME.

➜ i'm not a s*mp but,,,

➜ i would glady offer him my hand in marraige

➜ you two weren't quick to settle down, since the both of you have been busy with your own jobs especially then, trying to survive a comitted long-distance relationship

➜ but now that it has been almost a year since you two got married, hajime knew he wanted to start a family with you

➜ and when i tell you that if MANS EVER EVEN THOUGHT of having children WITH YOU, you're in it for a long long run my love

➜ listen ─ iwa is a rational and decisive man, stubborn too, but overall thinks first before bringing these types lf serious stuff with you

➜ knowing that once you agree, mans will not be able to hold back anymore

➜ it was quite funny actually, since it has been a running joke between you two with your baby fever phase in high school that you soon grew out of when you attended collage.

➜ iwa used to relentlessly tease tf out of you but even then, he couldn't help but be the one that you want to have a child with

➜ now all the left over pride he has vanished away while he looks like a CLOWN as he nervously asked you about starting a family with him

➜ emodiment of👉👈😳🥺

➜ because now it was YOUR turn to tease tf out of him, payback bitch

➜ iwa : what if we . . start a family?? 😳👉👈 haha i'm joking . . . unless??

➜ you : it's funny how bitches turned into my fans💅💸

“ wow how the turn tables ”

“ baby girl, i don't think that's how it ─ ”

“ ─ aha simp ”

➜ but regardless, you immediately agreed to his offer and you BET that iwa would give you payback for all the teasing you have done in the bedroom

➜ ok bet fill me up to the brim sir

➜ okay um chile ,, i have to keep reminding of myself that this is a family friendly show

➜ he may be a little busy with work sometimes, but he'll always try to have time to go with you on your baby check ups and appointments which, he, actually booked the second you told him you were pregnant

➜ but whenever he doesn't, he would always be a lot more affectionate whenever he goes home to see you and would hear how you talk about updates from the doctor as he just RUBS YOUR TUMMY as he apologizes for not coming with you😭

➜ when you gave birth to a beautiful hanako, iwa couldn't help but cry because wow??YOU ARE SO WONDERFUL AND HE IS SO PROUD TO HAVE YOU AS HIS WIFE, AND YOU GAVE HIM THIS LOVELY MASTERPIECE OKAY AIGHT

➜ hajime didn't really care about gender now, but before he actually wanted a son, but as i said now, all his mind was just about you and your daughter ─ his precious girls

➜ besides, he has all the time in the world to make a son with you or two

➜ hanako, no matter how sweet she could be ─ she is lowkey a little shit too

➜ prefers hajime over you but would LOVE to rile him up and make it seem that she prefers you over him

➜ he would be a strict father, but such a softie for his daughter that he forgets why he even was mad when your daughter pulls up with THE TRUMP CARD with the same puppy eyes you always used on him

➜ like mans was already a goner but aight

➜ gets FLUSTERED AND EMBARESSED whenever hanako wants him to play with her with her dolls and he also has to act out with her lmao, but we all know she was doing it on purpose

➜ your daughter is a   s a d i s t

➜ makes her dad watch all the OLD barbie movies because she doesn't👏like👏the👏new👏ones👏

➜ periodt 😡💅

➜ has grown to LOVE the thought of being a princess AND HAJIME CALLS HER PRINCESS ALL THE TIME AHH

“ but daddy i'm a princess !! of course i need a prince ” hanako pouted as iwaizumi's tick mark just grew with the thought of his daughter having another boy in her life other than him ( and oikawa & perhaps future brothers😳 )

“ why would you need a prince when you already have your knight in shinning armor here, ” he gestured vigorously to himself with his hands moving up and down from his head to toe

“ oh yeah! i guess i'm okay with that ” your daughter giggled before calling out to you as she saw you coming into her line of sight, reaching her hands out for you to carry her

➜ and by the time you have her in your arms, she would always nuzzle her little head onto your neck, but this time, before he could, she looked back at her father ─ but this time with a mischievous glint

“ ─ for now ” she smiled cheekily before tugging you to head over to kitchen because one, she wants to get away from her father's intense aura emitting from him, and two, she was hungry

➜ as you can see, bb girl loves to rile up her father, but as i said, iwa could never stay mad for too long

➜ would, yes, kinda yell at his kids, but would NEVER EVER hit them

➜ would kinda BONK🔨💥 them but not the childhood traumatizing methods

➜ he has strong beliefs that hitting children are a no-go, because it would probably affect them in the future, and there are other, better and appropriate ways to handle them without leaving them in child trauma

➜ since argentina is close to california where you and iwa have settled down, you bet that oikawa BEGGED them to have a small little reunion atleast every other three months LMAO

➜ and when you gave birth to your son, hayato, oikawa's offer did not STOP, and when oikawa finally had the time to visit you guys with his family ─ it was chaotic.

➜ first of, hanako is so mean to oikawa for some reason but she also kinda likes him too?? 😭

➜ oikawa : that's so upsettin😔

➜ then moves to hayato because unLIKE A CERTAIN SOMEONE, hayato being the precious bb boy he is, accepted all the love oikawa would give him

“ hana-chan, yahoo !! ” before uncle tooru could engulf hanako as he ran up to her with arms open wide, she avoided his figure as he went pass her and hit himself on a lampost

➜ with a blank stare, she crouched to his cowering figure as he rubbed the spot on his head that hit the post while whining, poking his side in curiousity.

“ uncle, are you alright ─ ”

“ ─ oi, shittykawa what are you doing ─ ”

➜ as you and your husband along with oikawa's wife and kids, run up to where the two duo were crouching, your toddler son tilted his head innocently

“ shittykawa . . . ? ”

➜ usually these reunion day would always end in traditional family dinner with the iwaizumis and the oikawas ─ and after that, their offsprings just couldn't get away from each other when it's time to go 🥺

“ i don't want them to leave :( ” hayato pouted as he wouldn't let go of his little tug on akiro's sweater

“ hana-chan !! ” hikaru clung onto hanako as hanako quietly glared at him, trying to shake him off while she shyly held onto akio as aiko starts scolding her little brother

➜ also side note : you bet that they would come back to japan just to attend aobajohsai

➜ anywh0res😍

➜ iwaizumi is the type of dad that would give EQUAL amounts of love to his children, would never have favouritism with his children because that shit actually hurts ngl😔

➜ would arm wRESTLE with hayato but he doesn't wanna hurt him so he would always let him win though it may cost his pride

➜ someone thirst with me about his arms please😭😭

➜ when he's soft'ish

➜ it was near father's day and you have been planning for it along with your children but you guys were anything BUT LOWKEY

➜ iwaizumi could literally hear giggling in one of the rooms and he goes to check it out and sees nodding vigorously at hayato.

➜ wanting to join in the fun, he opened the door and leaned onto the door frame expecting for you to call for him to join you guys

➜ but to his suprised, you guys stayed unusually quiet while your two kids avoided eye contact with him

➜ iwaizumi was upset being left out, but didn't really comment on it. but as father's day rolls in with your two kids waking him up as he goes down to the kitchen to see his favourite breakfast along with some cards from hanako and hayato, and with you smiling warmly at him as you took off your apron before kissing him a goodmorning in his cheeks ─ he knew it was worth it, whatever you guys were planning

“ ew, mommy kissed dada!! ” shrieked by your children as hajime stuck a tongue at them as he grinned at you, lovesick, before he could get to steal kiss on your lips, you pushed his head to look at the opposite side

“ brush your teeth first, and THEN, i will think about kissing you ”

[atinybitofau]

[ateez] J O N G H O ⤑ couple au

THE “UNLIKELY” COUPLE

aka he’s not your friend but his friends are friends with yours and you know how that goes

• no you haven’t met the infamous Choi Jongho.

• but you have met Jung Wooyoung.

• who was childhood best friends with Kang Yeosang,

• that inevitably knew your college lab partner Jeong Yunho,

• to which, back to Wooyoung, IS your best friend.

• and that’s how your friend circle began.

• Jongho was a little more skeptical when it came to making friends.

• because he was known to be this young masculine overall HOT piece of meat everyone just pined over.

• being somehow hand in hand with amateur model Park Seonghwa,

• street race buddies with hot topic Choi San and even hotter chaebol Song Mingi.

• oh yeah,

• those four were THE epitome of millennial upper class.

• and who just so happened to be the beautiful mediator in all this?

• a man who knew ALL boys without even needing you technically,

• your lovely neighbor of 10 years Kim Hongjoong who just loved to knock on your door every night looking for food.

• which in terms of this moment sort of looks like,

• “So I saw your door was open and brought some friends for your famous chicken parm!”

• you turn over your shoulder in complete and utter stupefaction,

• wrapping your half naked body with your lazily draped robe.

• “KIM HONGJOONG IM BASICALLY NAKED YOU IDIOT!”

• so maybe the mediator gets too comfortable sometimes..

• being able to drag 8 hormonal men into your house unannounced being the definition of too comfortable.

• “OH MY GOD, PLEASE GET OUT!”

• they don’t by the way,

• Hongjoong smiling smug with a cold cup of water and 7 flustered faces around your kitchen counter.

• and here YOU come approaching from your bedroom calm and not surprised at the least anymore that they’re still here.

• not when Hongjoong has caught you walking around your house naked almost once a week.

• but this was your love story with Choi Jongho right?

• and he just so happened to be the only one blatantly lovestruck staring at you.

• your eyes move to Hongjoong in spite of your own fluster greeting them all with a bow.

• “I’m sorry you had to see that..” your comment’s broad but your glare is narrowed at Wooyoung and Hongjoong who can’t smiling. “You two.. I swear, I’ll have your heads.”

• “When and where?”

• you snark a strong growl at Wooyoung before he kisses you on the cheek. “Now can someone please tell me why 8 very tall and handsome men are crowded in my house at 6 in the afternoon?”

• your eyes catch Jongho’s yet again,

• like instinct almost, animalistic.

• he’s as beautiful as everyone says he is.

• charm oozing right off his face and body.

• you don’t know why the way he looks at you seems different from everyone else.

• maybe it’s all in your head.

• that a look like that wouldn’t be dawned on you in a million years.

• “Well Seonghwa stopped by my place.” Hongjoong nods towards Wooyoung. “Then this idiot and now the whole squad’s here. Who, to my knowledge, you haven’t been well acquainted with just yet.”

• you chuckle at that sitting comfortably at a seat beside him. “Well considering the circumstances, I think we can all agree that we’ve been acquainted. Albeit not so visually at ease.”

• “Oh no your boobs are great!”

• you can’t help but laugh at the defense mechanism a new man you recognize as Mingi uses.

• the boys you already know ready to cut his tongue off.

• “Um thanks?”

• you don’t want to.

• god you don’t mean to—

• but your eyes do it again.

• in a room full of 8 men,

• 4 of which you don’t know in general,

• somehow gravitating towards one in particular.

• “I’m sorry.” Seonghwa notices first the way your eyes find a center on his best friend. “I don’t think we’ve all met. I’m Seonghwa. That’s Jongho.”

• then there’s two men you don’t know left.

• but the one you’re thinking of has already past.

• “I’m San. And Mr. boob fanatic here is Song Mingi. It’s really nice to meet you, y/n.”

• you’re obviously gonna look at the four.

• and it’s only right that you properly introduce yourself.

• but the moment your body gets engulfed in Choi Jongho’s warmth?

• he’s a “friend of a friend” you feel will be of way more importance in terms of..

• comfort.

• “Jongho?” you reappear from your bedroom half asleep noticing the rest of the boys had left. “What are you still doing here?”

• “O-oh, well I didn’t want to leave without thanking you. And apologizing on everyone’s behalf.” he subtly rubs his eyes setting down a book he was reading before smiling at you.

• you sleepily smile back sitting a safe distance away. “That’s sweet of you. But you do know it’s almost 1 in the morning, right?”

• “Right..”

• you lay your head against your couch smiling at him still. “Are you sleepy? Do you have to drive home?”

• he chuckles awkwardly rubbing at the nape of his neck. “Honestly I lost track of time and I don’t think I’ll be able to drive home in this condition.”

• “Oh well my guest room’s empty.” you unknowingly offer. “If you want you can sleep over? If you’re too tired to drive, I’d rather have you sleep over than get into an accident..”

• he smiles at you tenderly.

• and it’s almost like you’re two star crossed lovers.

• but maybe it’s all in your head.

• that the world wouldn’t be taking your side this easily.

• “Jongho, is this okay?” you come into your guest room, back facing first trying to lift a big comforter. “I couldn’t find my other blanket so—“

• you gasp,

• hands flailing in the air when you’re suddenly face to chest with something very bare.

• and very hot.

• “Is this your way of getting back at me for seeing you earlier?” he sultry taunts.

• your eyes lock again with his and it’s definitely not just in your head.

• the way his eyes gaze into yours.

• how he’s undeniably caught love at first sight.

• “W-well unintentionally I think.” you mumble.

• he holds you balancing your hips. “I think you’re visibly at ease with the situation regardless if it’s intentional or not.”

• “Choi Jongho, how much has Hongjoong told you about me?” your lips quirk when his does.

• “Enough.”

• “And what exactly is enough?”

• he gets impossibly closer.

• and it’s clear being friends with who he’s friends with, makes his age almost unseeable.

• “He said you’re very predictable. And that you’ve asked about me too.”

• you hum back softly. “Has he told you exactly what I’ve asked?”

• “If he’d ever introduce me? If I’m busy most of the time. Or if the rumors about me are true.” he clears with a cloudy mind. “But I was more interested in the things you say about me rather than what you ask.”

• you grin half heartedly hand on his chest. “Flattery only gets you half of what you want.”

• “And if it gets me all of what you want?”

• “What is it you could possibly want with someone you just met today?” you study his expression when he gets even closer.

• “Call me crazy but I think I want you.”

• two weeks later and you two think you’re able to hide the relationship that somehow formed so fast.

• between two star crossed lovers.

• two close strangers.

• curiosity killed the cat, would be good to describe the both of you.

• having spent too many nights at his house because yours was too vulnerable to infiltration.

• falling in love with him in less than .2 seconds.

• crossing the line of “just friends” before getting-to-know each other passed.

• and it’s not that you didn’t want his friends to know,

• your friends too.

• it’s that if they did,

• meeting your new boyfriend who was a friend of a friend might be a little too convenient..

• “So where were you last night?” Wooyoung questions you first with Yunho and Yeosang eerily following with eyes. “Hongjoong said you haven’t been home for the past couple of weeks. Care to explain?”

• you poke at your food. “I’ve been picking up some extra hours at work.. why the sudden curiosity?”

• “Because Jongho’s been incognito for the past few weeks too.” Yunho teases. “That’s a little too much of a coincidence, don’t you think y/n?”

• “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

• Wooyoung cackles. “I knew it. I fucking knew you had a crush on that man child!”

• “Man child— Wooyoung. That man child has 5 championship belts around his waist and nearly 10 million bucks hiding in a bank account somewhere. I’d have a crush on any man with those kind credentials.” you attempt to brush it off.

• but Wooyoung knows you better.

• Yeosang and Yunho too.

• so what more with Jongho’s group of friends who know him just as much as these three know you.

• “You’re dating y/n aren’t you?” Seonghwa smirks at the younger who blushes at the mention of your name.

• “W-why do you say that, hyung?”

• “Because why else would you reach for your phone and answer someone else’s text?”

• Jongho snatches his cell from Mingi’s curious hands that sends San in a fit of laughter.

• and you two eventually come to realize Hongjoong is next.

• and you were definitely not gonna wait for his wrath.

• being the reason this friend of a friend relationship even happened.

• Hongjoong always trying to spoil you and protect Jongho.

• “Jongie~” you wrap your arms around your boyfriend who should’ve expected your warm welcome.

• how you’re always eager to get a kiss from him any chance you get.

• except he’s a little stiff this time around.

• 6 other men, unbeknownst to you, following behind him feigning obnoxious gags.

• “Ew oh my god.” Wooyoung playfully shoved the both of you out of the way. “Try to keep it pg for the kids, man.”

• you roll your eyes still smiling up at your flustered boyfriend. “You told them?”

• “More like they told theirselves. I didn’t admit to anything.” he chuckles waiting till the coast is clear to steal a kiss from your pouty lips. “But I’ll admit to feeling better knowing these fuckers found out.”

• you hold your hand to his chest before leading him into the crowd in your kitchen. “Where’s Hongjoong?”

• they face you in a disgusted manner as if not waiting to be fed by YOU in YOUR house.

• “On his way.”

• Wooyoung smirks. “Good luck.”

• Jongho hides you behind him as soon as he feels it.

• because everyone can.

• how shaky and rumbled the room got.

• by just one loud,

• “WHERE’S THAT LITTLE SNAKE AND WHO GAVE HER THE RIGHT TO TOUCH MY BABY?!”

• and of course.

• even though you’re the one precious girl in between two groups of unlikely friends,

• Choi Jongho was still the notorious baby.

• “yours” truly.

@atinybitofau

[fantastic-rambles]

Ahhh yaknow what you’re right. I just went back and looked over some of the rod, and I didn’t see Langa explicitly agree to not to skate with Adam. He promised that he wouldn’t quit skating with Reki, but he only acknowledged Reki’s warning to not be reckless. It actually makes a bunch of sense why Langa would be confused by the distancing and argument. I see now why you were upset with Reki’s behavior. It feels kind of like a ‘secret contract’ sorta thing where Reki got upset over a broken rule Langa never realized he was supposed to abide by. And not only is that unfair like you said, but it flipped the situation as if Langa was being untrustworthy to his word when really Reki didn’t trust Langa not to quit skating with him just because of danger/injury. And especially since I’ve seen people make solid arguments for Langa being neurodivergent or neurodivergent-coded, it’s really not a stretch at all for him to see the situation like you did. Langa most likely saw the issue as solely reckless behavior leading to quitting. But clearly Reki’s own jealousy/insecurities added Langa preferring better skaters as potentially leading to them not skating together without ever discussing it until Langa was blindsided during the argument. I would’ve looked a better apology from Reki where he fully explained why he was upset when they were making up. It’s human for his feelings on the issue to change, but that should’ve been better expressed to Langa. Although Langa did a great job of accurately smoothing over what was bothering Reki without that. Maybe that’ll be rectified if he apologizes to Miya. I think Miya deserves one especially since Reki physically shoved him after he opened up about why his actions were such a sore spot for him. I actually thought Miya’s words would help Reki see the other side of things so seeing Miya get pushed was like a “Bro wtf??” moment for me. Again it’s understandable that people act out when they’re angry and Reki was obviously already struggling with his emotions, but it should be acknowledged again how wrong that was. Boy are you opening my eyes to a lot of problematic stuff lol.

Also, I’m very curious as to why you hate Shadow. For me, it’s because I can’t move past that comment in ep 1. I know ppl brush it off as just an (unnecessarily misogynistic) act for his persona, but that woman literally didn’t say anything to him and he insulted her for no reason by using her body as trophy to be defaced if he won. Ew. And just because he’s super nice to the flower shop lady, he does not get a pass. If he’s only respectful to women he’s attracted to and jumps at any other the opportunity to degrade women, he’s still a misogynist. And I’m pretty sure that he already new flower shop lady when the series started, so I don’t think you can argue that his character developed to be better towards women as a whole because of her or that he wouldn’t do something like that again at this point in the story. Especially since the goal of proving yourself as a “strong man” has not historically worked out to men being compassionate with women. (Tho within a vacuum devoid of his other actions, I can appreciate his commitment to a makeup routine)

Oh! And I would totally wanna read that fanfic if you write it!! I’m not even as gung-ho about Adam going to jail as most fans and Adam-haters tbh. Mainly because it’d probably be for political corruption via money bribes which is already kinda common and I don’t think the show has stated him to be doing anything particularly bad with it I don’t think so?? Like it seems to be mainly for the purpose of keeping S secret which is indeed a waste of money and effort when he could just buy it, but on the other hand, there doesn’t seem to be any ill consequences on the citizens the politician represents. So yea, it’s illegal so the jail time is technically deserved. But also like... no harm no foul🤷‍♀️ If he would be getting charged for assaulting other skaters than I definitely think that’s fair, but I doubt that’ll happen in the show just because I feel like no one will actually say anything when the time comes partially due to the shock of his arrest if they’re even involved. And I mean, Cherry was pissed at Adam for getting skaters hurt but still rolled out the hospital and joked like he was fine, so I just don’t particularly see anyone calling him out on it to the point of it being apart of his sentencing. The end of ep 11 with Cherry and Joe arguing about one of them going against Adam just doesn’t sound like condemning him to battery charges to me XD

But yaknow I’ve been loving hurt/comfort type fics lately, so I’d be really interested in seeing Adam truly work and change himself for some type of redemption in that setting. I can see hitting rock bottom as being really good for him given it may provide a reprieve from having to manage his image. Adam is underrated in complexity so it’s always cool when people try to flesh him out more and dive into his inner world. And of course Tadashi is kind of my fave (if you couldn’t tell) so I love anything healing for him as well :)

Yep, I was majorly pissed at Reki for how he treated Langa and Miya. His behavior is absolutely problematic. Not as bad as Adam, obviously, but with everything I’ve said and you’ve realized... yeah. I’m glad he made up with Langa and will probably make up with Miya, but it doesn’t invalidate everything he’s done before. Yes, he’s still an immature teenager, but I don’t think he realizes how messed up his behavior was, even after making up with Langa (the resolution seems to be based on him accepting that he’s not an ace skater, rather than recognizing how toxic his behavior was), so I’m still not satisfied. But hey, it’s probably just me being hyperfixated on trivial details that nobody else even cares about. /shrug

(I’m glad to know that I wasn’t misinterpreting the “promise,” or lack thereof, though!)

And I have two major problems with Shadow. My first--and biggest--problem is, as you’ve pointed out, that he’s an enormous misogynist. At “S,” people have the freedom to be exactly who they are beneath the facades that they show to the world. For example, Adam is someone desperately searching for someone who can understand him, not the perfectly put-together politician Shindo Ainosuke. Cherry and Joe are more true to their “real life” selves, but there are differences in their behavior on the track and off. And then there’s Shadow, the overcompensating “strong man” who threatens to make a guy tattoo “Dumpster Slut” over his girl’s name. So I 100% agree with everything you said about Shadow. He’s a chauvinistic pig.

The second problem is that I honestly think his actions when he’s racing are worse than Adam’s, and the only reason it’s not made out as such is because he’s the buttmonkey rather than the villain. I believe that, as problematic as Adam’s antics are, he does not intend to cause severe physical harm to his opponents. I’ve discussed this idea in more detail in other posts, but in short, even in the most extreme case--Cherry’s--his injuries were far lighter than they would have been if Adam had seriously wanted to hurt him. Death, coma, etc. were all highly probable outcomes of that situation, so the only reason they didn’t happen was because Adam was holding back. Or anime logic. But even anime logic can only stretch so far. And against lesser opponents like Reki, he generally holds onto them to ensure that they don’t accidentally hurt themselves when they’re panicking.

Of course, Shadow doesn’t intend to cause severe physical harm to his opponents either, but he does not exert any control over the situation after he throws fireworks at his opponent or shines a laser in their eyes. We’ve twice seen his opponents fall off the course as a direct result of his actions: Reki in the first race, Harry in the quarterfinals. They could have just as easily fallen off the cliff or slammed into a wall (at full speed) and been badly injured. If Shadow were an actual villain, I fully believe that he would have an actual body count of people who died racing against him (as opposed to Adam’s trail of injured opponents). So it bothers me that people shrug off what Shadow does while screaming for Adam’s death.

As for the scandal subplot... I’m *pretty* sure it’s a lot more serious than Adam bribing the police to leave “S” alone. I think he’s actually involved in some majorly shady/illegal activities politically. Like, in Episode 7, when the other Diet member gets pulled over, arrested, and has his house searched... there’s no way that has anything to do with “S.” At the very least, the two of them were collaborating on something really bad, something serious that Adam lied about under oath, and that’s enough for Adam’s staff to worry about what’s going to happen, especially Tadashi. We don’t know what it is specifically, but it’s definitely a lot more than just passing out bribes to hide “S.”

Lol, I’ll have to see how it goes. Probably won’t start it until after the anime finishes at the very least so I can see how it turns out for Adam and Tadashi, plus I have another half dozen WIPs at the moment and nowhere near enough time to work on them all. xD

[thebluelemontree]

True, @ladytp​. I’ve said in the past that the unkiss is actually a pretty genius move on GRRM’s part to develop the romantic and erotic parts of the relationship by keeping the whole thing in the mind of the young protagonist. It’s totally under her control, it comes from within her, and it moves are her own comfortable pace. While the Blackwater was indeed violent and Sandor was totally in the wrong, it still falls under that “generic problematic” category. He didn’t do the thing some people want to believe he did. And GRRM wrote the unkiss at a time when they were physically separated by some distance. 

This does function to avoid a huge chunk of sexual underage problematic content from direct interaction, which could be very helpful if your intent is to sell the general audience positively on future romance. The soil you plant those seeds in can’t be overtly poisoned or people just won’t buy “the HEA,” if that’s what he’s aiming for. I should have said that George isn’t totally blind or uncaring as to the effects of certain kids of problematic content can have on the audience. It all depends on his end goals, how he feels about the relationship, and how he wants the reader to feel by the way he presents it.   

I don’t think the general audience would clutch their pearls over a Sansan endgame. That seems to be more of a concern of the tumblr and twitter antis and people who give their media the fine-tooth comb treatment for any possibility of power imbalance in a relationship (real or theoretical) as irretrievably harmful and broken. Most readers and fans are not consuming the story that way at all. Most are totally fine with the problematic stuff, or at least it hasn’t bothered them enough to stop reading. Of course, the majority of Sansan fans (which is such a massive juggernaut of asoiaf ships) would be super stoked, and probably a good portion of the fandom would be won over in the end if its sold in a relatively believable and positive way. As for the rest, Sansan may not be their thing, but they would probably be at worst just “meh, whatever” or “ew, moving on” about it. This is where I think GRRM is placing his bets. He’s not writing to please the tumblr and twitter sector of the fandom, which is comparatively tiny to the whole. 

I just have to laugh a little bit, though, at the idea that dropping the five-year gap means George just wouldn’t go forward on a romantic endgame because the underage aspect would be too problematic for him. I mean, despite what he may claim about marriage norms in Westeros, he definitely goes there with the age gaps and teen brides quite a bit. He goes there every day of the week and twice on Sunday if you add them all up. So this is the weakest argument against the possibility of a Sansan endgame without the five year gap. Then there is the other reason that scrapping all the groundwork he meticulously laid out in previous books (for any storyline) and being faced with a whole mess of changes and plot consequences just to be a little less problematic seems like a really dumb and poor trade-off. He just doesn’t strike me as the kind of writer who will care if some people get really bent out of shape about him writing (in their opinion) something that should not have been. Most of the time he’s questioned about problematic creative choices, for better or worse, his usual response is either curt or to hand-wave it away.      

[pinkysfaultorbrainsfault]

pinky and the brain - s1e3b: that smarts

here it is. lol.

episode summary: frustrated at pinky’s constant disruption of his plans (okay, brain, if you say so) brain invents a machine to make him smarter. it goes about as well as you think it would.

the rundown:

it’s acme labs.

unless this is just some cage in the middle of nowhere, i guess. i don’t know.

no, wait. definitely acme labs. brain is writing in his Mouse Diary, probably relating the weird dream he just had about being in post-war japan. he has a lot of those, it seems, probably because it’s a good way for the writers to keep the status quo.

mumble mumble grump grump mumble mumble

“ah!” like he’s just discovered something. you’re not getting anywhere with those formulae though, brain. ∞A2-A= 2 to the tetration is just absolute gibberish and it’s not going to help you at all.

still, i’m glad he’s found what he’s looking for. satisfied with his nonsense calculations, brain calls pinky over.

bomp.

“narf.”

“what were you doing up there, pinky.”

“oh!” says pinky, who has just remembered he’s british. “i was having a devil of a time cleaning the chimney, brain.”

“we don’t have a chimey.”

“oh, well. there you are then.”

yeah.

brain reassures pinky that he is nowhere near the ceiling, which is good, because we don’t want more asthma than this poor guy already has. instead, he proposes to pinky that he’s figured out why they haven’t taken over the world yet.

“oh, i know why, brain. it’s gremlins.”

LITTLE SPRINKLY SPRITES THAT CONFUSE US

ALWAYS TWIDDLING THEIR LITTLE FINGERS IN OUR EARS

“an interesting theory.”

i like how brain draws himself, here. with the little ¬¬ face. grompy.

“but i have reviewed our past efforts, pinky, turning the situations into numbers in an effort to locate the exact problem.”

“well that sounds, um. narf.”

“yes, i’m sure it does.”

luckily, he’s plotted them all out on his little graph plotter, which is apparently going to paint a picture of the thing that’s ruining their plans... because... that’s how numbers work.... apparently? coming from the guy who thinks you can multiply infinity by -2 tetrated, forgive me for being skeptical.

let’s see how this goes!

oh.

still, pinky looks like he wants to put it on the fridge, so it’s not all bad, i guess. “egad, brain! that looks like me! but flat!”

“it is you, pinky. my calcuations have indicated that you are the problem.”

ouch.

“p... pinky?”

the leering figure of brain in his Man Suit behind him doesn’t help the tone, and should also probably serve as a reminder that sometimes it’s-- well, we’ll get to that.

poor pinky. ):

brain rubs it in further by deriding pinky as a “spazzy, beetleheaded dufus.” he has.... diagrams, to match. this is all very rude and unneeded.

😭😭😭😭😭

“but you’re not getting rid of me, are you, brain? i mean you? working as a single? look at what happened to jerry lewis when he split from dean! all that stuff in your hair--”

<gay little hand flip>

“point taken.”

“but fear not.” <gay little hand flip in response.>

but brain has another plan! he is going to make pinky smart. so that’s not too bad, i guess? oh he’s making me change everything about myself! but at least he didn’t dump me.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

i’m waiting for the christmas episode.

so brain gets pinky all strapped into the promare spinny machine.

he also makes this face when pinky asks why people don’t usually just make themselves smarter. so okay. he maintains that “the problem is in the execution”, but quite frankly i think it’s because most people aren’t into eugenics.

anyway brain activates the smartsotron.

it, uh. i don’t know why this shot was taken from this angle. i’m sorry. i’m sure, historically, it made a lot of people happy.

brain does some more scientific mumbling.

“fourty seven knots, six-- nineteen kelvin, fibbonaci, n minus one,”

“coming-- coming--”

in the nicest way possible, brain, i’m not sure he is.

“now!”

if you say so, brain. he goes off to pull the lever that. does that.

it has an effect.

the face of a man who is enjoying himself, apparently.

brain also shorts out the whole electricity for acme labs, which is very funny.

“pinky?” says brain, like he was concerned for his health like five minutes ago, when he put him into the bloody thing in the first place.

“oh, that was fun, brain! haha ha. narf. hoo! i’m all tingly! woo woo.”

“fun, perhaps, but obviously not successful.”

“oh, no, no, i think it was!”

“at first i thought the folded dipole wasn’t working as your centrefed, horizontally mounted conductor,”

“but frequencies below thirty megahertz--!”

“loud and clear! haha!”

“and i must say, brain, the peak value wave shape of the impulse voltage? glorious! i mean, hitting that maximum value without appreciable, superimposed oscillations! egad brain! brilliant!”

haha ha.

“YES!”

good for brain. the worrying implications of his assumption that making pinky smart would cure his tourettes??? we can worry about that later.

narf.

anyway, so tonight’s plan for world domination is that brain will pose as jimmy hoffa--

okay.

anyway, he intends to pose as jimmy hoffa and manipulate the old labour leaders into worshipping him.

with that, they will help him utilise the industrial complex to build a “forced vertoconvector”, whatever that means.

“it will create millions of steaming, tiny guysers that will actually lift people several inches off the ground, immobilising them.”

“egad, brain! it’s like giant air hockey!”

unfortunately for brain, his coefficient values are wrong. “it’s suppose to be sin, not cosin. kind of flips the whole thing around. haha. won’t work.”

inside his head, brain screams, quietly.

but never mind! initially, he’s excited, because pinky has saved them a whole night’s work! tremendous!

and luckily, he has a backup plan, which is also totally going to work. “take a look at this one,”

“colleague.”

“oh, brain.”

this is how mice flirt, i guess.

ignoring that “colleague” is a slight downgrade from “lifelong friend,” brain explains that he intends to program a computer to generate a fantastically popular romance novel, that i actually don’t want to look at the cover of for too long.

ew.

let’s move away from that. the romance novel “will contain a hypnophonetic sentence so long and so confusing that the reader will be forced to reread it, endlessly, out loud, and the frequencies of those sounds will hypnotise all those around them, primed for my suggestion that,”

I RULE THE WORLD. it’s not quite a close up but it’s a funny face so i’m counting it.

pinky is not as hype.

“the frequency needs to be an exact integral multiple of the input, doesn’t it? or it’ll be all wobble wobble bluueeroooogh.”

that’s one way of putting it. “not hypnotic at all, nope. won’t work.”

“yes. you’re right.”

brain is not enjoying this any more, it seems.

“by converting our cage into a nuclear reactor, we can produce enough energy--”

“but your migration area is tiny, brain! the neutron will never be able to slow down from fission to thermal in here!”

“please, pinky. let me finish--”

“but it’s got to be at least one sixth of the square distance between--”

“pinky!”

lms if you are the square distance between pinky.

“it seems to be, brain, that it’s not my fault at all that these plans haven’t worked.”

man. we don’t get to see pinky mad at brain very often? i love it. please let him get this mad in the reboot. madder, even. let them argue, wb!!

i don’t think brain has much grounds to argue, considering that he is, of course, the inventor of Really Big Magnet That Sticks People To The Floor By Their Pocket Change. still, he gives it a go.

he drags pinky back over to his weird little graph machine, citing that he “calcuated it himself” and “the numbers don’t lie.”

<gay little hand flip>. that’s not entirely fair because this is a tween but. it’s funny.

“actually, there seems to be a little booboo right here.”

poke.

he sets about correcting it, of course!

brain may well be at his limit.

(they angle that through the bunsen burner as it boils over, which is a very nice touch. it’s a metaphor, kids! he’s having a Hard Time.)

“these-- this!--”

“it’s preposterous what you’re saying! it’s ridiculous! it’s absurd!”

“but brain--”

“just go!”

“naaaaaarf.” going mouse! leave. ):

but now that brain has vented his own raging insecurities, he has some calculating to do.

well! isn’t that a merry little plot twist.

brain’s response to this is to have a nervous breakdown, because of course it is.

“no!” he cries. “he’s even smarter than i! smarter!”

“but i have accepted my own errors. the team needs balance. balance! yes.”

this can’t be good.

conclusion:

meanwhile, pinky is mourning their friendship! and all of the bops on the head.

“being a smarty is no fun! brain doesn’t like me.”

awww. ):

hm.

meanwhile, brain is wittering on about how “sacrifices must be made,” as he plugs himself into the machine.

“fourty seven knots, six-- nineteen kelvin, fibbonaci, n plus one, coming.” despite that, he doesn’t seem very happy to be here.

bonk.

brain runs back to their cage excitedly, to show pinky what he’s done!

and immediately falls over in the process. aww.

“pinky! look! i’m a ninny! a wooden headed dumbdumb!”

“there’s not a smart thought in my whole empty head!”

this man is having a nervous breakdown.

“narf, i say! narf to the world!”

wait, what’s that noise?

ah.

“ah! it’s good to be back. brain? brain?”

bonk.

that doorway is evidently a real problem for them. someone should probably fix it before they break their little ankles. ):

“i fixed it! i’m a nitwit!” pinky cheers. “hurrah!”

“yes. i fixed it as well, pinky. i’m as dense as a tree stump.”

“you mean--”

“yes.”

“well, we’ll just have to make you smart again, don’t we?”

“we can’t. we’re both too stupid to operate the machine.”

so instead they just sort of sit down and give up, i guess.

“what do you wanna do tonight, brain?”

“the same thing we do every night, pinky.”

“what’s that?”

“i have no idea.” says brain, in a monotone, clearly upset deadpan. “narf.”

so that’s that, i guess.

originally, i was going to give this to brain - they were both as smart as each other, and if they had worked together they probably could have taken over the world. all he had to do was take the L and let pinky advise him.

on the other hand.... pinky is emotionally intelligent enough that i think he could have had a shot at reasoning with brain about it. and if he’d tried, then he would have figured out that brain had put himself in the machine, and if brain had tried to reason through his insecurities, he would have worked out that pinky had put himself in the machine, and--

basically they get half a point again.

brain: 6 pinky: 7 outside influence: 11

because i think that’s fair.

either way, they seem to have fixed it, somehow, by the next segment. so it’s all good.

BRAINSTEM BRAINSTEM.

[nayutai]

Sleep Walker

⇢ Genre fluff (this nearly killed Jesus Christ fluff authors are powerful)

⇢ Pairing Jimin x OC

⇢ Word Count 4251

⇢ Summary Jimin finds himself wandering into a 24-hour coffee shop after his efforts to sleep have proved unsuccessful where he finds more than just the caffeine boost he needs to get through his day

⇢ Notes this goes out to my love bug @tae-tae-drives-me-kray​ 

Working the night shift at a 24-hour coffee shop makes for a very boring shift. Most of the customers clear out by the time that two o’clock rolls around and those who do pop in are on their way to their own early morning shifts and generally don’t stay long. They also don’t usually start arriving until at least 4:30. For Amira, this means that she can eat snacks and binge watch Supernatural until the day time people show up for the most part. At $11 an hour it’s a pretty cushy gig if you don’t mind the fucked up sleep schedule. 

The sound of the bell above the door tinkling loudly just before three sends Amira flying from her perch on a stool behind the counter. Whoever it is giggles melodically at the flurry of creative curses that come out of her mouth as she rises to your feet dramatically. She gives them a dirty look that softens at the way their eyes twinkle even in the low light of the cafe. 

“Are you okay?” At least they have the decency to ask about her well-being after nearly giving her a heart attack. The lower half of their face is covered in a mask and a baseball cap sits low on his head. If it weren’t for the fact that this person’s eyes look so friendly she’d be standing a lot closer to the silent alarm and the baseball bat that her manager allows her to store under the counter. 

“Just peachy for someone who was on the verge of death. What would you like to order?” He rattles off the name of some frappuccino thing with an assload of ingredients and Amira has the sudden urge to beat her head against the granite countertop. Being that she works night shift, most of her barista knowledge circled the memory drain a long time ago due to the fact that the most complicated thing the early morning demographic orders is flavored iced coffee. A walk in the park compared to the science experiments that the daytime crew is required to mix up throughout the day.

“I’m gonna keep it real with you, chief. I forgot how to make this but I don’t have the authorization to do refunds so if it’s bad you’re stuck with it.”

“At this point, it could be dishwater and I’d drink it as long as it’s got caffeine.” 

And yet he ordered one of the froo froo drinks Amira thinks to herself. Those drinks have the least amount of caffeine out of everything on the menu. He’ll be asleep before he even finishes his drink.

“Well if caffeine is what you need, this drink isn’t what you want. I’ve got just the thing though.” You put away the clear cup for the frappucino with his consent and reach for a regular coffee cup. “What’s your name? I know you’re the only one here but it’s against store policy for any cup to leave this hellhole without a name on it.” He seems to panic at the thought of giving up his name, a wary look morphing his gaze. Her brows creases as she watches him contemplate how he wants to answer what she thinks is a very simple question.

“Jimin...” He says after a minute.

“Ha, that’s cool. There’s a guy in BTS with the same-“ Amira’s hand freezes halfway through writing his name as her drowsy brain starts connecting some very important dots. The news lady on channel six had said they’d be in town this weekend but never in a million years did she expect something like this to happen. She peeks at him from beneath her lashes. He looks ready to bolt out the door at the slightest provocation so she do her absolute best to remain calm for his sake. 

Alright, sis you can do this. Just stay cool, calm, and collected. Mama ain’t raise a loser you can do this.

Jimin visibly relaxes when Amira starts writing again and turns to start making his drink. It’s a special concoction she makes for her fellow graveyard peeps. It’s strong enough to knock a donkey on its ass which is why it’s such a hit. One of her regulars, a long haul trucker, tells Amira all the time that he doesn’t know how he’d make it through his long drives without the liquid defibrillator that he practically orders by the gallon. Definitely doesn’t seem safe but he’s got an incredible driving record and he always brings her a fistful of the soft peppermint candies she’s partial to. 

“Thank you for not freaking out. I’m not really supposed to be here.” Jimin mumbles as he accepts his drink. He loves interacting with fans but not at two a.m when he’s barely able to stand up from his lack of sleep. 

“I gathered as much. Not many global superstars stroll through here at this hour or at all really.” Amira give him a smile that she hopes puts him at ease and, judging by the way his lips turn up a bit, it may have worked. 

“Couldn’t sleep and we’ve got interviews all day so at this point I don’t have time to sleep hence the desperate need for caffeine.” He takes a cautious sip of the drink in his hand. She wasn’t kidding when she said that it would help. The caffeine hits his veins with the force of a speeding bullet train and Jimin already feels more alert just a few sips in.

Somehow, talking about his sleep troubles snowballs into a conversation about Disney movies and why Maleficent is the baddest bitch in the Disney realm when the blaring of his ringtone cuts her rant short. A heavy sigh escapes him at the interruption. He’d much rather listen to the adorable barista in front of him continue her impassioned argument, but duty calls. 

“Guess that’s my cue. Thank you for the drink and the company.”

“No problem! If that shit starts fucking with your heart rate though you did not get it here. I refuse to be attacked by your twitter army for giving you heart palpitations. I ain’t built for that type of guerilla warfare.” Jimin full on belly laughs, nearly dropping the rest of his drink in the process. He couldn’t get rid of the goofy smile on his face even if he wanted to. 

He grips the door handle in his hand but something is holding him back. Something feels unfinished and his feet refuse to move any further until that changes. Jimin turns around to see the source of his frozen feet standing behind the counter again, staring at his still form curiously. Before he can stop himself, Jimin crosses the short distance, snatching the pen stuck to the top of her apron to scribble his phone number on a nearby napkin. The gagging noises she makes when she realize what he’s just done make him feel justified in his rash decision. This time when he backs away, the smile on his face is one of mischief.

“Don’t let this be the last time I talk to you or I’ll never forgive you.” Jimin’s steps feel lighter as he treks back to the hotel to face the wrath of his manager. He hopes desperately that she texts him later. A frown replaces the grin behind his face mask at the prospect of his new crush not contacting him after tonight. His steps falter slightly as he processes the fact that he just met her not even a full hour ago and has already developed a full-fledged crush on her. Oh, Amira, so powerful and yet so unaware of it.

[Amira]: best friend

[Amira]: rise from the dead

[Amira]: I have a story to tell and before you even ask no it can’t wait until a decent hour

[Pomegranate]: if this doesn’t involve you meeting BTS or you hitting the lottery and paying off my crippling student loan debt I promise I don’t care 

[Amira]: ….sometimes I swear you’re psychic

[Pomegranate]: BITCH DID YOU HIT THE LOTTO????? 

[Pomegranate]: I BEEN YOUR BEST FRIEND FOR 13 YEARS DON’T FORGET ABOUT ME

[Amira]: shut up I didn’t hit the lottery but I did meet someone from BTS…

[Amira]: Jimin to be more specific

Incoming call from Pomegranate

“Well look what we have here. A traitor.” Jimin rolls his eyes at Taehyung’s dramatics but his best friend and bandmate is having none of it. “How dare you go traipsing off into the concrete jungle without me? We’re supposed to cause mayhem together and you left my ass in the middle of the night like I’m some side chick.”

“It’s really not this deep, Tae.”

“To you. Which is exactly why I snitched to Sejin.” Of course, Taehyung was the one to rat him out to their manager. He could be quite vengeful when he felt that he’d been wronged and obviously he took not being invited on his late night coffee hunt as a personal affront. The Capricorn energy coursing through his veins absolutely could not let that stand.

Jimin opens his mouth to respond when his phone vibrates in his pocket. He ignores it for the sake of pacifying Taehyung but when it vibrates twice more his curiosity gets the best of him. 

[Unknown]: uhhhh hi? 

[Unknown]: ew that was awkward as hell pls forgive me

[Unknown]: shit I didn’t even tell you who I am wow anyways this is the barista you tried to kill earlier also known as Amira

Jimin snorts at Amira’s messages which piques Taehyung’s interest in a major way. He can’t recall a time when his friend has ever looked so disgustingly happy over a text message from anybody. Just as he’s about to lean over to look at the screen, Jimin shoves the sleek iPhone right in his face. He’s babbling on and on about how funny and cute this Amira person is which only serves to further confuse Taehyung.

“I just want you to know that none of that made sense to me.”

Taehyung is almost sorry that he asked as Jimin launches into an impassioned retelling of the beautiful girl that made him a drink that is sure to keep him up until the end of time. A slow smile spreads across Taehyung’s face as he connects the dots. Jimin has a crush. A big one. He can’t wait to tell the other members that their precious Jiminie has finally found someone that meets his incredibly high standards. Out of all the idols back home, both male and female, that have practically thrown themselves at Jimin’s chelsea boots and it’s a random cafe employee that manages to make him totally enraptured.

“So let me get this straight,” Amira’s eyes follow her best friend Cameren as she paces back and forth across her living room. “It’s a regular degular night at work until some guy in a mask walks in and scares the shit outta you. Lo and behold that guy is fucking Park Jimin from BTS and you make him drink that god awful elixir of the damned you insist on serving to people and he actually liked it?”

“Not just that.” She fishes the napkin with Jimin’s number on it out of the pocket of her sweatshirt and carefully unfolds it so that Cameren can see the string of digits scratched into the napkin. The creative string of curses that fly out her mouth would make most people blush but after more than a decade of impassioned screaming, Amira doesn’t even flinch. Her eyes widen comically though when she notices Cameren reaching forward as if to snatch the napkin out of her hand. She thanks God for gifting her with reflexes quick enough to keep it out of Cameren’s reach.

“Bitch! Let me see it.”

“No! He gave me this because he obviously trusted me not to pass it around and I don’t plan to disappoint my future husband this early in the game.” She replies indignantly. 

“Look at you. All delusional and shit but whatever I respect it.” Cameren declares as she props herself on the coffee table in front of her best friend. “So, did you text him?”

“Of course I did. Who do you think I am?” Cameren opens her mouth to respond with what is no doubt going to be some witty quip about exactly who she thinks Amira is, but she’s interrupted by the tell-tale ping of her phone receiving a text message. The shocked look on Cameren’s face is perfectly mirrored on Amira’s as she slowly picks her phone up from the couch cushion she’d sat it on. 

[Kristoff Hater]: you’re too adorable to be awkward

Amira sits frozen in place as she reads and rereads his message. There’s no way he just said that. There is absolutely no way in hell that the Park Jimin himself just called her adorable. Have the heavens finally opened up? Did God decide that today is the day that she secures the biggest win of all? She’s in such a state of shock that Amira doesn’t even notice Cameren trying to get her attention until she starts physically shaking her shoulder. Amira’s voice box is still refusing to function so she simply hand over her phone to let Cameren see the message for herself. Her friend’s answering shriek perfectly voices Amira’s own feelings.

“He’s typing again!” Cameren thrusts the phone back into Amira’s hands just in time for another message to appear on the screen but she quickly close the conversation when Jimin starts typing once more. It takes longer than expected but the tell-tale ping from her phone makes Amira’s  heart skip a beat at what he could possibly have said this time. 

[Kristoff Hater]: speaking of you being adorable I need a contact picture so go ahead and hand one over and no one gets hurt 

[Kristoff Hater]: or don’t because you’re an autonomous human being and that’s totally up to you but I would really appreciate a picture of your face because I think you’re you’re cute and wow I’m rambling over text which is super embarrassing so I’m going to stop typing now byeeeee

This time, Amira is the one screaming.

“It’s official. You scared her away.” Taehyung claps Jimin on the back from his spot behind him in the van. Jimin continues to stare dejectedly at the stagnant conversation with his mystery woman. It’s been hours since he’d went out on a limb and asked her for a picture with not even a hint of a response. He’d originally thought that he’d eventually get over it and go back to normal but now he’s not so sure.

“Leave him be, Tae.” Namjoon pipes up from Jimin’s left. “It’s important to fully feel and process your emotions no matter how depressing they are.”

“Oh, so now the wannabe philosopher is going to preach to me?” 

“It was probably too good to be true any-she texted me back!” 

[Coffee Almost Bae]: I’m so sorry 😭

[Coffee Almost Bae]: In the interest of total transparency I had a meltdown because you called me cute and I’ve spent the last fourteen hours trying to psych myself up to respond 

Jimin nearly melts into puddle of feelings right where he sits. This girl is entirely too cute for her own good and she doesn’t even realize it. His fingers start flying in response, but his frantic typing is interrupted by another message.

[Coffee Almost Bae]: I believe you asked for this {image attached}

He’d thought that Amira was cute when he’d first met her at the coffee shop but seeing her in this picture is making his heart race. She’s clearly at dinner with friends judging from the crowded table full of food behind her. He’s incredibly appreciative of the way her jeans snugly hug the hourglass frame that her work uniform hides. His eyes are then drawn upwards to her face and he finds himself getting lost in the sheer brilliance of her smile. Eyes bright with a playful energy. Jimin is sure he’s never seen anyone more captivating.

“Yeah I’m definitely in love.” He proudly shows off Amira’s picture to the rest of the group, relishing in the comments about how pretty she are. Jimin chooses to ignore Yoongi’s comment about how he wasn’t sure that she actually existed until he saw the picture. His heart flutters in his chest as he stares fondly at the picture on his screen. He’s so caught up in her beauty that he forgets that you have to actually reply to the text messages in order to keep a conversation going. Until his phone vibrates in his hand.

[Coffee Almost Bae]: OH MY GOD YOU THINK I’M UGLY DON’T YOU I KNEW THIS WAS A MISTAKE I HATE IT HERE 

Jimin’s eyes go wide as he realizes the unforeseen consequence that his awestruck staring has resulted in. The concerned questions from the other members roll off his back as he tries to fix the mess he made. The two extra concert tickets that he’d been holding for two of his friends suddenly come to mind. Frustrated with the way he keeps misspelling words in his haste, Jimin throws caution to the wind and hits the call button. He doesn’t know why he’s so desperate to fix this, especially since he just met this girl less than forty eight hours ago but he can’t deny the nerves coursing through him as he waits for Amira to answer the phone.

“Cameren, he thinks I’m ugly. I just know he does.” Amira whines and it’s nearly Cameren’s breaking point. She sighs frustratedly over the phone as she does her best not to yell at Amira for overthinking and sending herself into a panic. 

“This man saw you in an unforgiving barista uniform, bare-faced, at three in the morning and still somehow thought you were cute.” Cameren can hear Amira inhale to interrupt her but she powers through, giving her no option but to listen. “If he saw you looking like that then there’s now way he thought the picture you sent him was ugly so stop overreacting. He’s a fucking international superstar someone probably stopped him for an autograph or something. Or maybe he thinks you’re insane for losing your shit because he took more than five minutes to respond.”

On a more rational level, Amira knows that Cameren is right, but it’s not every day that a girl actually gets to live out their fantasy like this. So naturally, she’s insecure and full of nervous energy that is near impossible to get rid of. What if his sleep deprivation made him delirious? What if fully awake Jimin thinks he made a mistake? Cameren is still ranting when Amira’s phone beeps with another phone call. She pull the device away from her ear to see who it is and nearly choke on her own spit.

“He’s calling me! I gotta go.” She ends the call with Cameren and answer Jimin’s before her overactive nerves can convince her not to. The second Amira accepts the call, all that can be heard is Jimin apologizing profusely. Somewhere in there he mentions something about concert tickets and soundcheck and her brain decides to finally kick in to get some clarification.

When he finally starts speaking slow enough for her to understand him, Amira is stunned even further into silence. Front row tickets to their next concert with a primo soundcheck position? Yeah, there’s no way she could pass that up, but there is one issue. Their next concert is in Toronto. As if he can sense what she’s thinking, Jimin immediately offers to fly Amira and whoever she wants to bring with her to Toronto. The sound of raucous laughter in the background drowns out his next sentence, so she can only assume the rest of the group is giving him shit for that.

“I can’t let you do that, Jimin.” Amira already knows that Cameren is going to kill her for this when she fills her in later, but she doesn’t want him to feel like she’s using him for free stuff. He tries his absolute best to change her mind but Amira doesn’t let up. 

“At least promise me that last night won’t be the last time I see you.”

“I promise. Now go to sleep before I tell army you’re neglecting yourself because I can hear the exhaustion all in your voice.” Jimin laughs at her playful threat which makes her heart swell with pride at being the one to make him laugh like that. After being a fan for so long, Amira can perfectly picture the adorable way his eyes have probably scrunched closed as he laughs with his whole body. The reluctantly bid each other goodbye after Jimin makes her promise once more that they’ll meet again.

Months have passed since the day Jimin turned Amira’s life into a wattpad fanfiction and since then life has changed in numerous ways for both of them. Amira has gotten a new job. A new dog. A new house. Meanwhile, BTS has hopped from country to country playing to sold out stadiums. Broken fistfuls of records that established western acts admittedly balk at. And yet, despite all these changes, Jimin and Amira’s presence in each other’s lives has remained constant. Whether it be a funny meme he saw online, a FaceTime call at an indecent hour because time zones are weird, or even a postcard from whatever part of the globe BTS has ended up in. Despite their best efforts though, their late night conversation over coffee did not get the follow up that they’d promised to have. 

Amira is on her way back to work after meeting up with Cameren for lunch when she gets a text from Jimin. It’s a picture of what looks like a schedule for the upcoming month and it looks pretty empty save for a flight to LA on the fifth. The image is accompanied with several eye emojis and Amira connects the dots immediately. The second she returns to the office, she submits a request for two weeks of leave time. After snapping a picture of her screen, her fingers fly across the screen with a quick message to Jimin.

Amira hasn’t seen Jimin in person since that night at the coffee shop and that thought keeps her up at night as the days fly by. No matter how much careful planning they put in to try and see each other something always seemed to come up and foil whatever plans the two of them had concocted, but this time feels different. Like everything might actually fall perfectly into place. That brings up the question about how Amira is going to handle being face to face with Jimin again. All of his flirting and little pet names have been hard to handle over text but to be in the same room with him and keep her cool is going to be a new kind of challenge. He’s been very direct about what his feelings are and though she feels the same, Amira has been hesitant to reciprocate his romantic sentiments in fear that what she feels is rooted in her love for BTS as a fan. Cameren has been Amira’s saving grace with her pep talks but nothing could ever truly prepare her for the force of nature that is Park Jimin spending two uninterrupted weeks in her house. 

Jimin arrives in a whirlwind of designer luggage that he quickly tosses aside in favor of peppering kisses all over Amira’s face while she playfully attempts to fight him off. Her terrier Luna runs circles around the both of them in a frenzy at having a new friend to play with her. Amira’s heart is beating erratically in her chest as Jimin switches tactics, choosing to simply hold her close to him.

“Hello to you too, Ji-” His lips pressing against her own stops Amira’s sentence in its tracks. 

She’s always admired how soft his lips looked but to find out just how soft they actually are sends a rush of endorphins coursing through her. All of the qualms she’d had about falling for him melt away like ice cream in the summer sun. Her insecurities suddenly seem so significant as his lips mold against her own like they were meant to be there. A deep groan rattles Jimin’s chest when she gets over her initial shock and reciprocates. He tastes of strawberries and the faintest hint of mint when he explores her mouth with his expert tongue. Amira decides then and there that she would gladly die of suffocation if it meant she could kiss Jimin till she croaked.

They could’ve remained locked together for an indefinite amount of time if not for Luna tugging on Jimin’s pant leg with her teeth, demanding her fair share of his attention. He doesn’t hesitate to scoop the energetic fur ball into his arms, scratching behind one of her ears as Luna practically vibrates in his arms.

“I think this is the part where I tell you I’m in love with you and want to be your boyfriend.” He lifts Luna next to his face and Amira knows she’s in trouble. “Don’t you want to wake up to us every morning? At least for the next two weeks?”

“Kiss me again and you’ve got a deal, boyfriend.” 

[lideria]

Sugar Rush Love. | Haechan

Request: Hi hi can I request a fluff for Haechan or Mark? Thank you. Sorry I’m not super specific but I don’t have any ideas right now lol

Author’s Note: This was super fun to write! I really hope everyone who reads it enjoys it quite as much as I did while writing. Plus, just a heads-up, it is pretty dialogue-heavy, so I’m sorry if that’s not your type of thing :)

Warnings: One or a couple of curse words, brief mention of body form, comments on eating/mentions of stress eating, brief mention of injury, mentions of non-Ramadan-friendly content, and I think that should be it! Plus, English is my second language so there might be errors. Please let me know if there is anything else!

Word Count: 2493

Genre: Fluff, Angst if you squint, college!au, baseball!au, crushtolover!au

I hope you all enjoy!

“Sorry for waking you up and all but would you wanna have a picnic? Like some snacks, I guess?”

It had been maybe 2 hours since you had fallen asleep when Donghyuck calls. His voice makes it clear that he is wide awake at who-knows-what on a weekday. It somewhat worries you, but at the same time, he is always like this. Energetic. At unnecessary times as well. However, it still did kind of annoy you how he fancied the idea of a picnic at— you check your phone— “At 4 in the morning?”

“Why not? I’m craving a lot of stuff and it’d be sad if I went out to get a bunch of snacks just to eat them by myself. You like what I eat, no?” That was true. You both had likings for similar foods in general. Though, he was not the type to have snacks around this time. Especially around this time of the year, if you recall right. Maybe something was wrong with his mood?

His voice sounds just fine, though. So it cannot be that.

You sigh to yourself, defeat settling in, and turn on the light beside your bed. “Fine. Where do we meet?” A hand goes up to rub at your eye, triggering a yawn almost immediately. He takes a while to answer, sounds of shuffling in the background. “The field.” There comes a creak from his side. Possibly a door as it is followed by a loud slam. “It’s open at this hour?”

He chuckles. “It’s always open. The amount of freaks that go out on a jog at 2:30 in the morning.. you wouldn’t believe it.”

You grin knowingly. “For you to say it… Don’t you have to be one of them to know?” Silence.

Then, a dramatic sigh of annoyance. “Shut up. Wear something thick.”

You end up wearing an oversized hoodie over your pajama shirt and some much more presentable sweatpants before washing your face, brushing your teeth and rushing out to not keep him waiting. It is chilly outside, almost cold as the breeze hits your newly washed face. Lights are off for the most part. Silence calming yet bizarre.

There is something about living in a heavily populated area and going out at weird hours. Because as you stroll your way down to the field through the campus, the city outside the campus still as well, it feels like walking through a deserted city. As if the whole city is for you and you only. You could do whatever you want to do.

Some part wants to scream and pierce through the silence, but it is too perfect to ruin. It would be a shame.

The campus is big, but definitely cramped. Very cluttered and populous to the point that it feels small. It is only at times like these and when you are down with some kind of sickness when you realize just how much distance there is between the on-campus apartment complex and the fields. But it feels nice— the clutter. Almost makes it feel homey.

When you are a little more than halfway done with your walking you feel your phone buzz in your pocket. You do not bother checking, because you know it must be Donghyuck texting you to hurry up or whatever. Then you look up.

And it dawns on you why he must have felt the need to go outside instead of hanging out in the dorm lobby.

The sky is incredibly clear— too good to be true in an area with high light pollution. A bunch of stars are visible, more stars than usual for sure. No clouds whatsoever. But also, no Milky Way. Yet it is still better than good enough, because the moon is full and is shining with all its glory and scars, and stars are twinkling in a rhythm what feels like a melody.

You continue to walk mostly with your eyes fixed on the sky, and if anyone asks you it is truly a miracle that you make it to the field without falling. Severely tripping, yes, but not falling.

It almost feels like he is not there when you push the doors and walk into the track circling the diamond because of how quiet it is. But there is a faint amount of light almost in the middle of the giant patch of grass with a body hunched over it, so you make your way over.

He does not get up to greet you. He does not have to. You sit on the grass that is definitely colder than the weather itself and throw your arm around his shoulders to give him a brief hug. He hugs you back, but you know. You know for a fact Donghyuck is annoyed. “Why don’t you look at your phone ever when I text you? I actually asked for something,” He laughs out a huff of annoyance and points a finger at the bag of snacks. “I forgot to get tissues. I’d send you back to go get some but I won’t because I’m a good friend.”

Friend. Funny. A friend who has a crush on you and does not bother to hide it, and a friend whom you have a crush on and do not quite bother to hide it from. Just a couple of crushing friends who will not take action. “It’s fine, we’ll just lick our fingers.” You say as he makes a move to pull out the snacks, interested in what he has brought.

There is a bunch of sweets, with definitely way too much sugar at this hour. Considering Donghyuck is already energetic and seemingly not sleepy, the oncoming sugar rush that awaits both of you is scary.

He breaks a chocolate bar in half. You cannot help the question that blurts itself out. “Isn’t season starting soon? Don’t you have to not be eating these?”

The half chocolate bar gets pushed onto your lips, as if to tell you to shut up, please. “Yeah. If coach doesn’t know it’s fine.”

You give him the look. He gives in under the pressure. “I’ve been eating lots of carbs and proteins for training season and oh my god, my diet is filled with bland foods. I want to taste something, and I’d much rather prefer it to be sweet.” He takes a bite which is almost all of the half he has in his hand. It makes sense he is frustrated. “I’ll just have to run harder tomorrow— today.” He places his arms on his knees that he has pulled to his chest, his arm clenching a bit. His words struck you harder than they should, and you frown. “One night won’t break your form.”

“I know. I just want to be at my best so I have a chance at getting picked up this season.” With that, he takes the other bite, and his half of the bar is gone. You lean back on your hand and look at him. What he said makes sense, but also does not. “There is no reason you wouldn’t get picked, you know? You’re so good at running, and your aim with the bat is sharp enough.”

Donghyuck leans forward to pull another snack— moon pies, and you laugh. “You sure you’re not stress eating?” He takes a look at you for a split second, hands you the pie even though you are not done eating the bar, and takes one out for himself. “If only you ate what I’ve been eating for the last several weeks, then you’d get me. Plus, my game is top notch when it comes to stress management.”

That brings a mixture of snorting and giggling out of you as you turn to look at his profile. “Sure. As if you weren’t screaming when Jungwoo told you—“

He turns to you in an instance, and the moon pie’s crumbs go everywhere when he speaks. “Not completing the track on time for like more than twenty times after you come back from an injury makes you panic. Rightfully so.” The crumbs stick to your face, even, and it is gross even if he is your crush. “Jesus, okay, ew. And also, of course it’d make you panic, but it was only a whole two seconds longer than your personal best. You did not need to scream that much.”

He shrugs and lets himself fall onto the field. It is then that you realize he is only in a t-shirt and a sad excuse of a cardigan. Which is very hypocritical of him if you do say so yourself. “It’s just… Baseball is what I do, you know? It keeps me on a scholarship, I’m actually somewhat good at it which is great because I for certain suck at my degree, and it’s what I want to do for the rest of my life. So it’s important for me to get picked up this season. Of course it’s okay if I don’t, because I’ll have the chance for another 2 years unlike Jungwoo, but the earlier the better.” The level of frustration grows with each sentence, and he keeps doing these hand gestures that cause his hands to flail around a little.

You also let yourself fall when he stops, but forwards on your stomach instead of backwards on your back. Your face is above Donghyuck’s as you lean your head on your propped up hands. “You wanna drop out once you get picked up?” It would make sense, really. He was not the one to keep good attention on his academics. Not because he does not want to, but because he just cannot do it.

He clicks his tongue and meets your eyes. When he speaks up, his voice is quieter. “Not really. If I get injured again it’s probably over for me, so,” The breath he exhales hits your face. “Gotta have a plan B.”

Both of you sit in the quiet breeze for a bit after that. Still snacking on a variety of his favorite snacks, you try to bicker with him. But instead, he asks you how school is going for you. You tell him the quizzes and the assignments and the group projects, and how nobody shows up for the group project meetings, and about your club life which is equally as exciting for you as baseball is for him, but the pace is definitely much more different.  

“Are you even aware of the sky tonight? Look at all the stars— the moon, too.” You do it to direct the conversation anywhere else, because frankly, you both knew you did not want to talk about school at 4-something AM. He does look up, and smiles. “I was here before you came, so of course I’ve seen it.” Deep breath. “Really pretty, like you.”

You cannot even try to contain the smile. The blood rushes to your cheeks and hands. “Stop. I’m dressed in presentable pajamas and I’m every shade of ugly tired.”

“I’m here for it, personally.” He elites up his voice and places his hand on his chest a little before proceeding with his speech. “In my humblest of opinions, the pajama look is far better than the looks of whoever’s dating my upperclassmen.” Then, he goes serious again as you start to laugh at what you suspect to be the beginning of his sugar rush. “No seriously, some of the people they’re dating are actually intimidating. More than coach, even.”

“Oh so I’m not intimidating?” You ask, hand posted at your chest. He laughs slightly, almost uncomfortably. “Uh, no, you’re scary when you get angry.” Lucky for him he understands he is only making matters worse, and you laugh out loud more when he starts rambling. “Of course that’s not to say it’s bad, yours is a cool kind of intimidating. But they are there to support them, and after the games end it’s like they will take them home and punish them even if they’ve done good.”

“Some people are into that kinda stuff though.”

Donghyuck looks at you, genuinely disgusted. “No.”

The sheer horror and disgust on his face finally makes you burst into the sleepy-sugar rush laughter you had been holding back, and he starts laughing his fairly dumb sounding laugh along with you. “I’m not shaming whoever likes it but damn, let them celebrate, I don’t know—“

“The thing is, that’s their way of celebrating.” You manage out, holding your stomach as you laugh still, and even though both your stomach and your lungs were begging you to stop the laughter kept coming on stronger as his face dropped further with confusion. “That’s not what I meant— So what, if people look pissed at their significant others, that might be PDA too? That makes everything so complicated though.”

You are crying. At the dumbness of the conversation, and the 5-year-old energy of what you both find to be funny. He laughs as well, especially when your hands under your head give out and you fall on top of somewhere between his chest and shoulder. It takes a while for both of you to stop and come to your senses, and when you do, he asks you something with a smile audible through the words. “Would you come to my games for good luck?”

Wiping at your eyes, you answer with a shrug. “Maybe. But you need to answer something first.”

“Hm?” Your finger points at the sky within an instant. “What do you prefer, the stars or the moon?” He must be dumbfounded, because he does not answer for some time. “The stars, I guess?”

Faking an overreaction, you also fake your voice to sound harsh. “Wrong! There was a line, and you crossed it. I’m not coming to the games, hope you have fun.” You giggle again, the sugar really hitting you now, and maybe the lack of sleep since the moon has started to shift down a little. Donghyuck looks at you and frowns. “Don’t use that tone with me, or I’ll kiss you.”

The laughter is still not over, and your eyes hurt with the continuous laughter. You did not even know if that was possible. “No you won’t— you never do!”

But then he does.

Chocolate infused into his lips, hovering on top of you, he kisses you on the field. His lips are soft, the kiss not so much, but he is kissing you and oh god it is going on. He actually means to kiss you.

So you place a hand on his neck to just enjoy the feeling and to feel in the moment. Put a bit more of yourself on your part into the kiss as well. He smiles. When he is not smiling, you smile— and you just do that. Take turns smiling, silently celebrating the kiss because finally.

This was a pretty nice way of sobering up.

[fisheoctrashdump]

Jess 1-20 (with Jax, Blez, and Kaya)

So I completely forgot about the holiday headcanon and I currently can't think of any now so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Cooking

As we know, Jess is absolutely horrible at cooking.

I do imagine she has times where she thinks "Sacra and Blez make it look so easy…" and attempts to cook anyway, which predictably ends in disaster.

Even little Jess is bad at cooking, but she still enjoys helping with cooking/baking and dumping too much or weird ingredients into what's being made.

I also like to imagine Jess vibes in the kitchen with whoever is cooking (assuming she's not drowning herself with work) to feel like she's helping somehow. She usually somehow ends up standing in front of whatever drawer or cabinet the other person needs to get into every single time lol

Sleeping

She's surprisingly clingy when she's sleeping.

Before bless, I feel like Jess liked sleeping in smaller beds because it felt less empty.

Shortly after they started dating, Jess panicked that her bed wasn't big enough and went out to buy the biggest bed she could find. (Jase regretted helping her with it when he finds out why she got it lol)

Driving

Jess actually really enjoys driving. I imagine she finds long drives to be soothing, and it's something she does when she finally decides to take a break from the pressure of work or whatever else. She could barely fuckin see for the longest time, but she still managed to be a fairly decent driver despite this and nobody knew she had shit vision because of this lol

Bathing/showering

Admittedly, there were times Jess went without bathing for a few days because she was so focused on her work. She eventually forced herself to speed shower when she remembered to do it while drowning in her work. The other three in bleblesscra are a big help in reminding her to take care of herself and help her breaks

Hugging

(I'm going based off of memory for the next few so if things contradict other things then oof)

Just gonna stick hugging and general physical contact together

I don't imagine Jess is super comfortable with hugging, especially during and shortly after gen1 events. She does make an exception with Blee and Sacra, but only after she trusts them more.

Jess changes a lot by gen2. She is so much more affectionate with everyone around her.

Kissing

She feels uncomfortable initiating kisses, especially in public. After she and Blee start dating, Jess is very reluctant to kiss her considering what happened right before they did start dating. She eventually just feels comfortable enough around Blee that she allows herself to do this, as long as it's in private. When she starts dating Sacra, she still only initiates in private.

During gen2, Jess will kiss her partners whenever the mood hits. Typically, it's still mostly when she's alone with her partners, but occasionally Jess will see one of her partners and be filled with so much love for them that she will kiss them regardless of where they are or who's around.

Sex

Babies ewe

I don't have anything to share about her sex life that hasn't been mentioned before :(

Physical appearance

The biggest change to Jess's physical appearance between gen1 and gen2 is the glasses. Jess can finally see. I feel like she never got glasses before because she just didn't like them and really didn't want them. She will go times before gen2 where she will refuse to wear her glasses, but she eventually gets used to them

She also has shorter hair in gen2, but it's not much shorter. It's armpit length I think.

Wardrobe

Jess goes through a major wardrobe change between gen1 and gen2 holy shit. Before and during gen1, Jess wore mostly only darker colors like brown and black, and wore very concealing clothing. She owned pants, button up shirts, and high collared compression shirts, mostly.

After moving to earth, Jess expands her wardrobe a little. She starts adding orange and yellow clothing, and eventually, she also adds things like dresses and tank tops once she gets more comfortable with the idea of it :)

She also owns clothing for little space! Little Jess likes to wear overalls, but she also has like long striped socks and cute skirts and stuff uwu

Jewelry

No jewelry for her normally, but…

She does own a lot of jewelry for when she's in little space. Little jess loves jewelry, but it's mostly the cheap plastic stuff. I could see her wearing like ten necklaces at once and bracelets covering her arms and running around like that lol

Nickname

Jess is short for Jessabelle OwO

I think Sacra calls her Jessy when she's in little space

I don't think there's much for nicknames for Jess tbh

Dancing

I don't think Jess is much of a dancer, though I do like to imagine Sacra sometimes gets her to dance with him like a romantic slow dance kinda thing.

Singing

Jess doesn't like singing in front of other people. She's not super great at it, either. She sometimes sings certain songs when it's just her and Sacra, though.

Anger

Though Jess gets annoyed by little things very easily, it takes a lot to make her actually angry. She says things she doesn't mean when she's mad, and when in an argument with her, she will cut deep to whatever will upset that person. She takes her anger out on the source, usually, but this is sometimes a problem she faces with her partners. She will learn to hold back with them if they ever anger her, eventually.

Soft spot

Blee, Sacra, and Blez. She is so in love with them.

Photography. Seeing certain photos makes her melt, especially the amazing places she's photographed while doing travel photography.

The bleblesscra cats, eventually. Once she gets more comfortable around them, she welcomes all three of them laying on her (though she's still not sure why they choose to sleep on her so often lol)

Her children, once she has them.

Adrien, Jase, and Jax.

Probably Amanda, too.

Favorite possession

Her camera. This one is pretty obvious why

Her twenty one pilots jacket uwu

Favorite photograph

I mentioned this one before, actually, because I tried so fucking hard to draw it XDD 😭

Before and during gen1 events, Jess refused to have her picture taken. It takes a little while after moving to earth before Jess warms up to the idea, and she decides to make the first picture of her a picture of her and her partners together. It's her favorite, and always will be.

Relationship with ___

Jax

Jess's relationship with Jax is significant because he's the first person she connected with after being separated from her family (I mean, other than Embry but that was short lived XDD ._. )

Aside from reconnecting with Jase, of course, Jax became the only person Jess could rely on. She noticed early on into knowing Jax that he seemed to have a strong fondness for her, and honestly, it felt nice. Weird, but nice. It wasn't something she was used to, but Jess felt comfortable enough around Jax to start opening up to him. It was slow, of course, but she wanted to be closer to him.

By the time story events start, Jess will have a deeper friendship with Jax than she ever thought possible. He's the one she goes to for advice, and the one she most likes spending time with other than Blee. This all comes at a price, though, because she will realize that there's a lot that Jax is hiding from her and it feels strange. He knows so much about her, but she doesn't know a lot about him. She will understand, in a way, because after all she does keep some things from him (regarding Adrien, most specifically), but the balance between what she knows and what he knows is definitely off.

Additionally, she starts to wonder why Jax and Kiro are so distant. If it were her brother, she wouldn't hesitate to rebuild their relationship. She's even still trying with Jase, after everything they've gone through so far. All of this combined with the fact that Jax is hiding something from her about Jase causes Jess and Jax's relationship to suffer for a lot of gen1 events. In fact, it gets worse after she finds out what it was Jax was hiding from her. It hurts her, but when she finally gets a chance to talk to him face to face after atrova events, she is able to work through things with him and Jax ultimately gives the promise to Jess that he will be more open with her.

Leaving Jax behind to go to earth with the others will actually be pretty hard on Jess. She talks to him pretty often, and looks forward to seeing him on their visits. At one point during one of their visits to kartoffel, (before Jess has any kids of her own), Jax makes an excuse to spend time alone with Jess and they finally address the romantic feelings for each other that have been growing over the years. Jess and Jax make the decision to start dating, and enter a long distance relationship.

During gen2, Jess doesn't really have any issues with Jax. She's not aware of Jax keeping secrets from his other family because he doesn't do that with her anymore. She has known about the issues with Josine and Kiyan, and all of Jax's concerns and theories about everything.

Jess feels a lot of love for Jax like she does with her other partners. She sometimes wishes one of them lived closer so she could see him more often, but that's really her only complaint.

Blez

Blez didn't really make a good first impression on Jess. To her, Blez seemed like a child pouting over not getting her way. She felt even more uncomfortable being around Blee, because Blez gave them odd looks.

Once Blez apologized to Jess on atrova, she agreed with the points that were made, but she still didn't really feel that Blez was sincere about her intention of getting along with her. She was, though, and for a brief time she felt more comfortable in the group when Blez was around.

After Blez and Clay break up, she feels bad for her, but she doesn't think about it too much. When Blez talks to her and Sacra about her feelings for Blee, she wasn't really surprised, but… the timing was horrible, honestly. Regardless, Jess had no issues with Blez and told her to take that chance with Blee, if she really felt that way. (I've thought before that Jess might be uncomfortable or weirded out by Blez's feelings for Blee, just because of her situation with Jase, but I changed my mind on that. Blez is obviously different than Jase, and Jess would see that and not really be concerned about her being an insane yandere lol)

Through the rest of the story events, I have been imagining little moments between Jess and Blez where Blez asks Jess to help her learn how to defend herself and such. Actually, I think this happened during old hnmp events too? If it did I guess I just really liked that idea and it has stuck with me ever since.

Anyway, during this I feel like Jess starts to develop feelings for Blez. She sees Blez as a completely different person from where they started, and Blez shows the more complicated sides of her without completely unloading all her problems on everyone.

As they get closer, and Jess realizes her feelings for Blez, she kind of panics about it. Almost as bad as when she realized she had feelings for Sacra, honestly. The last of the story probably has so much going on that she's able to keep the thought out of her head, but once everything is resolved and they're all deciding what to do next, Jess is very aware of her feelings for Blez. And, she's just not sure that Blez even feels the same way.

At some point after they get to earth (and also after Blez and Blee start dating) Jess tries to find some way to confess to Blez. I'm not exactly sure how this will happen yet, tbh, because I still don't see Jess as confident enough to confess. Maybe Blez will? Who knows?

Anyway, Jess is so super soft for Blez. I imagine the positive energy Blez brings to the relationship is great for Jess. Also, whenever Blez starts going on about a new interest like an otome or show or something Jess is always just really supportive and trying but also so confused. She doesn't follow along with a lot of Blez's interests. It's moments like when Jess is sitting with Blez while she works on her cameras, or when they sneak off together to drink monsters and Blez lets Jess pick all the music that makes their relationship.

Kaya

I imagine Jess to be a very overprotective parent. With Kaya specifically, she becomes this way more with her after the event with Jaiden's dad. Jess feels horrible about what happened, and she blames herself for not being able to prevent it. All Jess wanted was for her kids to experience a better life than she got to, and with Kaya, she feels like she failed her.

Jess is very encouraging to Kaya. She noticed that Kaya seemed to pick up the same habits as her when it comes to work, so Jess tries to do for Kaya as her partners did for her. She helps Kaya take breaks and tries to encourage her to go hang out with her friends rather than letting her school work consume her. Some days it seems this worked a little too well, because Kaya will stay out until (or after) her curfew.

Despite all this, Jess is trying to trust Kaya to make good decisions. She does ask questions about where she's going and who she's going with, but Jess knows Kaya is prone to lying.

[bokumonoexchange]

Family Traditions

Hey there, @beck-a-leck! I was super glad to see you’d be interested in some good old Hector & Colin interaction. I adore those two and I adored the opportunity to write them. I also lurked on your AO3 to get a better idea for what you might like, and I saw you had an interest in some Hector/Holly stuff, sooooo…I threw in a bit of Potential there as little a treat. Please enjoy! Sorry for the late!

>>Read the story on ao3<< or go under the cut!!

Another splash, and Hector half rose from his lawn chair, ready to dive into the river to save his drowning son.

“I’m all right!” Colin assured him, high-pitched words tumbling over each other. “I just—I just lost the fish again, Pa.”

Hector sank back down, huffing in disapproval to mask his concern. He went back to whittling, as if he hadn’t, for an awful moment, worried another family member had been swept out of his life. “Gotta stand your ground, son.”

“I—I know!” Colin insisted. “These fish keep takin’ my bait. Pa, you reckon they’re hungrier than us?”

These last few seasons, the Westown river had been flowing cleaner and livelier than it had since—since Colin was born. Hector figured the fish were eating better than ever. He shook his head, even though Colin, still plonked by the riverbank, wasn’t looking his way. “You don’t have the bait on right. That’s all.”

“I’m no good at this. I can’t do anythin’ right at all.”

Here he goes.

“Takes time to master a craft,” Hector grunted before the tears crackling in Colin’s voice could spill. “Takes patience.”

Silence from the riverbank. Cicadas rasped in the trees above them, hidden away in thick, dark leaves. Sunlight lasted longer these days, but dinnertime never changed its hour. And Hector’s stomach was starting to gnaw itself at the edges. He tried to remind himself of his own patience, too.

“Pa,” Colin started to say. Hector grunted for him to continue, scraping his whittling knife along the thin strip of wood. “Did you have to…take time with yer whittlin’? For me and my appliqués?”

“Yep,” Hector said. He set aside the finished barbeque skewer and reached for the next strip of wood.

“Does that make whittlin’ those skewers easy now?”

“Yep.”

More silence. Sure didn’t sound like any fishing was getting done over there.

“Won’t have much use for these here skewers if ya don’t catch us somethin’ to skewer,” Hector reminded him, and with a squeak of dismay, Colin rebaited his line.

Their family barbeque was shaping up to be a good one, if Colin ever managed to get his rear in gear and catch them at least one hefty-sized fish. There was nothing like the clean summer taste of roasted carp, his ma’s macaroni salad, and coleslaw from Frank’s last spring cabbage crop. Marco said he might make it down, but Hector knew his hip had been hurting from last night’s rain. Frank had canceled, too, since one of his ewes was due for a new lamb and he was worried, as her last birth had been a rough one.

But the menu was still shaping up right fine, and if their yearly barbeque was just going to be him, his ma, and his son? Well, Hector couldn’t complain at all.

“Having fun out here?”

Hector only just managed to stamp down on his alarm. Good thing, too: this whittling knife had a taste for careless fingers. Holly, the other farmer, stood smiling above him. Apparently, she had decided to make use of the good summer weather: a fishing rod was slung over one shoulder and a fishing pail tight in her grip.

“Holly,” he greeted her. Holly’s smile grew, like he’d shown more enthusiasm than he had. She turned towards the river, shading her eyes against the glaring sunset even under her wide-brimmed hat.

“You’re not out there with him?” she asked, pointing to Colin. Hector huffed and shaved a piece of bark a little too roughly.

“Gotta learn how to do things on his own.”

“Oh, I—I didn’t mean to be rude,” Holly hurried to say. Hector glanced up again, surprised to see an embarrassed flush dusting her cheeks. “He’s a smart kid!”

Huh. Why in the world would she be feeling awkward about that? Hector furrowed his brows, which only served to make Holly fidget more. The hard-cut bark shaving drifted off his corduroy pants and onto his boot, and—oh. In the echoes of his memory, his voice had sounded defensive…

“Didn’t mean to be rude myself,” Hector half-apologized. “Good of you to be concerned for him, farmer.”

“It’s Holly by now, isn’t it?” she smiled again, and when he only grunted, she seemed to take that as an excellent excuse to plop herself on a log next to the freshly-dug firepit. And she didn’t seem to need to say anything more than that. No comments on the weather. No mention of the unused fishing gear in her hands. No chit-chat of nothing.

Instead, they sat in silence. No, not silence: the cicadas still sang their cacophonous melody; the river still gurgled; Colin still sighed every time a splashing fish broke free. Even the rhythmic scraping of his whittling knife on wood felt like it could say more about this fine summer air than Hector could put into words.

“Sorry I ain’t much of a conversationalist,” Hector did finally feel the need to say. Now it was Holly’s turn to jerk from her peaceful perch on the log.

“Sure you are,” she said with enough conviction Hector wanted to believe her. “You just say what needs telling, that’s all.”

True enough, but now Hector had no idea what to say to that. Better to keep an eye on Colin now anyway; he’d finished plenty of skewers for the barbeque he hoped still would happen. Hector set them all down and tucked his whittling knife back in his belt. As his eyes drifted towards his son, tugging on another splashing line like he was saving a dog from a well, movement in Holly’s general vicinity proved her eyes were doing the same.

Just in time, too: with a whoop of triumph, Colin yanked his first prize from the water. “Look, Pa!” he yelled, whirling around with it still on the hook, not in the pail.

“Colin, ya gotta—”

Colin caught sight of Holly’s proud gaze, and of course, all that jubilance fizzled out of him, replaced by that paralyzing timidity that he wasn’t yet managing to break. He fumbled with the line, with the hook, with the bait, and the fish leapt back into the safety of its watery home once more.

“Colin.”

Hector never could figure out how to make his sighs more of an exhale than a growl.

Colin sniffed. “Pa…Pa, Miz…Miz Holly, I…I c-can’t, I didn’t mean no—”

“You did really great, Colin!” Holly interrupted him with so much gentleness the glistening shine left Colin’s huge, miserable eyes. “You almost had it.”

“Yeah, yeah, almost…” Colin repeated. But right away, his lip trembled. “B-but I couldn’t right manage—”

“That just means you’ll get it next time! Come on then. Can I help out?” Holly was already rising from the log almost before Colin started nodding. She picked up her rod and pail again and joined him by the riverbank, telling him in soft tones how he didn’t have the bait on right. Softer and more patiently than Hector had managed. Colin kept nodding along with each of her instructions, wrapping his line finally the correct way and letting her fix his stance. Holly kept him steady, hands on his back just brushing his shoulders. Distant enough Hector doubted Colin could feel it. Close enough she could catch him if he stumbled.

Hector only realized he’d been staring at them far too long when Holly glanced over her shoulder, fixing him with a goofy smile and a merry little wave. And of course his immediate response was to scowl and look away. Right away, he wished he could turn back and make some sort of apologetic acknowledgement back, maybe even a hand raised of his own, but Holly had her back turned to him and was helping Colin slowly, slowly reel what seemed like a promising catch from the far end of the river.

It was safe now to scowl in private, then. Hector busied himself with collecting stones for the firepit so he couldn’t dwell on any lingering embarrassment.

Colin squeaked something incomprehensible from this distance. “Good work, Colin, you almost have it,” Holly’s lilting response drifted over even to where Hector was rustling about for proper-sized rocks. A smile, a true smile twitched on Hector’s lips, when Colin exclaimed something back, no longer timid or ashamed.

Westown had been a far lonelier place before Holly had shown up, especially in this part of town. It wasn’t just Holly who’d moved in, sure: plenty of new faces had rolled on in, too, either on vacation or to set up new shops. Hector tossed the rocks towards the firepit and began arranging them in a neat, orderly circle. A splash, two cheers, and rapid-fire chitchat alerted him of Colin’s very first catch.

Still. For all Westown’s new liveliness—and Tsuyukusa and Lulukoko, so he’d heard—Hector knows this town’s all the better for having Farmer Holly in it now. It just wouldn’t be the same without her, without all these new fresh crops, these new fresh friends from far-flung faces, these new fresh emotions shining on his son’s face Hector had never seen blossom so quickly.

It’d do Colin some good to hear that, he reckoned. Holly too, of course. But because Hector’s mouth was too hungry to be capable of politeness or praise, what came out instead was, “Y’all gonna be done soon, or do we gotta roast up nothin’ but macaroni?”

“Um,” Colin called back, but he cut off his own excuses with another excited cry and began reeling in another fish. Holly stepped back even more, letting Colin claim a fully independent victory over nature. She tucked her hair behind her ear under her hat and smiled so big at Hector he froze in place.

“Probably just one more,” she said while Colin’s defeated foe joined the last in the pail. “He tempted two big old beauties! Plenty of good stuff on them, I’d say.”

Hector grumbled and mumbled and fiddled with the kindling until she went back to watch Colin’s confidence grow. Just within his earshot, the tell-tell screech of the screen door announced his ma’s approach.

“What’s takin’ y’all so long?” she huffed in lieu of greeting. Hector prepared to defend himself and his son, but before he could formulate any sort of response, Holly and Colin’s voices drew attention to them both and away from any of his excuses. “Well, aren’t they babbling like a brook,” Ma mused, crossing her arms over her chest.

Why she wore a cardigan even in this stifling summer heat, Hector would never dare to ask. “Brook’s babbling full of fish,” he said. “Reckon they’ll be done soon.”

Ma cackled. “Promises, promises. Oh, that sweet Colin of yours…”

“He’ll keep it,” Hector said. “Boy’s in good hands. Can see that plain as day.” He stood up, stretched, and headed towards the house to collect the rest of the barbeque spread and plates.

“Hm.” Ma was still watching the two fishing experts perform their duty when Hector returned, juggling far too many bowls, jugs, and tableware than safe. Fortunately, Ma didn’t notice, which meant she couldn’t lecture him. No, all she said was, “This town really feels like some kinda family now, don’t it?” and Hector had lucked out by just finishing setting their cornucopia in a proper, less-dangerous array on the biggest felled log.

Hector, a taciturn man on a good day and a surly one the rest of the time, simply had no reply to that. Fortunately, Ma didn’t seem to need one, because now came the lecture on how much he’d carried himself, why couldn’t he just ask for even the littlest bit of help, she’s not so feeble she can’t take care of her son even a little more…

By the time Ma had worn herself out with her affectionate nagging, Hector had finished lighting the fire and had begun gathering the fresh skewers. “Gotta soak these,” he said needlessly.

Ma sighed. She sounded just like him sometimes. Even Hector could tell. “Then you got all these here dishes out too soon. Flies’ll be at ‘em before you know it.”

“Two of ‘em’ll be done soon, I said,” Hector protested again. Ma, for some strange reason, smiled, soft and warm. She patted his arm without commentary.

“Kids,” she called over to the riverbank duo, “don’t keep your elders waitin’ too long, y’hear? I’m so famished I may just waste away!”

“Gram!” was Colin’s distressed cry, but Holly shushed him and placed his hands back on the reel.

“Don’t go teasin’, Ma.”

“Boy’s gotta learn manners from someone.” Ma patted his arm again with another twinkle in her eye. “Sure didn’t learn ‘em from my son. Didn’t even invite her to dinner, did ya? Terrible manners as ever.”

“Ma!” Hector exclaimed, wincing as he realized he’d sounded exactly like Colin, tone and pitch and all. Ma wheezed another laugh. He cleared his throat as if he could muster up his dignity that way and almost muttered something about where’d she think he learned his manners from, if not his own parent…

But one look Colin’s way, with his own expression and gleeful, beaming smile at Holly while they wrangled the last fish into the bucket made Hector and his deep scowl decide to keep his trap shut. It had served him well in the past, and it’d serve him well again.

“C’mere, you two,” he called over to them instead. They obeyed, Holly reminding Colin not to walk too fast with a bucket of still-wriggling fish. “Sit down,” he said, and brought out a second knife. “Me and Holly, we’re gonna show you how to clean a fish, aren’t we? Family barbeque tradition.” Holly’s eyes widened, lips parting surely to make some sort of protest. Hector mustered all his strength and continued, “Won’t hear nothin’ to the contrary. You’re family, ain’t ya?”

“Yes,” Holly agreed after only a heartbeat’s worth of silence. “Yeah, we are.”

[sabinefm]

( bruna marquezine , cis female , peach ) welcome to aida&stefano , SABINA REUBE ! thank you for choosing to stay here. in this form it says that you go by the SHE / HER , you’re TWENTY THREE years old , you’re originally from SAN FRANCISCO , and you’ve been staying here for ONE YEAR . it also says you’re known to be + RESOURCEFUL , but also - SELFISH. that really shouldn’t be a problem though. check in at the front , hope you enjoy your stay ! (the click of heels, hot sand under your bare feet, chocolate covered strawberries, the imprints a bra leaves on your skin, red lipstick staining your fingertips )

ABOUT THE MUN.  i hope this email never finds you 

hello all, my name is pepper and i have never been on time for anything, ever in my life sdjkdskj this is especially true today, rip. no but honestly, i never thought i would actually get accepted into this beautiful rp so i stalled checking acceptances cause i’m a Scaredy Cat and that made me really late, and then i ended up taking the rest of my coworker’s shift cause she had to go and thus ended up coming home even later than i thought which has made me really really late... BUT against all the odds i’m here! and ready to party! and tell y’all about my bby sabina! but first a little bit about me, i am twenty four (ew), i can’t cook (rip), and i currently spend most of my lonely quarantine days either watching anime or scrolling through tiktok. i am canadian but every canadian that meets me thinks i’m american and i don’t know why. when i was a child i had an irrational (or yk very rational) fear of sharkboy from sharkboy and lava girl, and tbh it has never left me. i was also afraid of gill from kim possible so you can imagine my horror when that fish f*cking movie won an oscar?? when i was younger i also thot god looked like king triton from the little mermaid cause he was white and he had a beard yk. it fit in my little brain. and finally i just recently discovered girl in red and therefore feel like i finally got my bi girl card,,, feeling validated in this chillis tonight. and if that doesn’t tell you everything you need to know about me idk what will. anyways, that’s officially enough about me onto who we’re all really here for, ms sabine!

BIO.  the lengths i would go to to both get attention and avoid it... astounding  tldr ; daughter of a guy who created a dating site + app, came to a&s after leaving her husband to be at the alter after catching him cheating with her mother, wants to be a bad bitch, sometimes succeeds. 

THEN.

sabina came into the world the child of a mediocre stay at home mom and a penniless entrepreneur so it goes without saying that she had very little. her dad had a lot of passion and a lot of drive but no one would really give him a chance, and her mother kind of only married the man because she was expecting him to make it big enough for her to never have to work another day in her life so? yeah she was hella disappointed tbh 

but not sabina! she looked up to her father so much as a child. while her mom was kind of ~emotionally unavailable~ her father was too, but like at least he had a dream he believed in, yk? he wanted to help people fall in love and sabine being the big romantic she was as a child had never heard of anything so noble. her daddy was her hero. sabina honestly had big daddy’s little girl vibes until she was like 22 tkjsdkjd

one day when their family credit card got rejected one too many times sabina’s mother called it quits on yk the whole mother gig. she left sabina on a bench outside of the grocery store while she went to go home and ‘get some cash’ which even at seven sabine knew was a damn lie cause they were too broke to have any damn cash. and yeah that was the last sabina heard of her for a long ass time. it was a reverse ‘dad went to get some cigarettes’ situation but just as traumatic honestly. 

although not as much for sabine’s dad. that man literally saw his wife leaving him as a minor setback and moved on. he threw himself harder into his work, to the point where sabine barely saw him. this was the start of sabine desperately trying to compete with her father’s business for even a sliver of his attention. this was a battle she usually lost. 

sabine raised herself for a while there, since her father yk remarried his job and her mother was following the jonas brother’s cross country. she became both very independent and very lonely for a child, which was an odd combination that both haunted sabine for pretty much the rest of her life after that point and lead her to make most of her worst decisions. but that’s a story for another time, because right when all hope was lost sabine’s father won the lottery. literally. 

all at once they were five million dollars richer. they went from nothing to everything real quick. and this marked a change in the reube’s lives in a way sabine couldn’t have even imagine at the time. 

sabine’s father hector used the money to fund his business and that shit blew up! he created a site by the name of loveisblind that was in the ring with the likes of match.com and christianmingle yk, one of those dating sites. everyone on loveisblind is set up on blind dates based on the information they fill out on their profile and are only allowed to see each other when they reach a certain point of emotional intimacy. the site had wild success rates, and got very popular, blah, blah, the point was the reubes? suddenly rich af!

and you think that would give hector more time to spend with his daughter right? no. it gave hector the money to hire nannies for his daughter. 

yes, somehow despite hector no longer having to work himself to the bone, sabine saw him even less. tragic really. she really became that lonely rich girl trope real quick, and this is what unfortunately got sabine into the habit of seeking the attention she wasn’t getting from her father in other men and women, which she is not proud of. 

that unfortunately didn’t fill the void that sabine had but you know what did? making the loveisblind app so her daddy would love her. basically around the time that tinder started gaining traction and getting popular, people stopped going on the loveisblind site and started instead turning to apps. her father was trying and failing to get into that market, and sabina, being yk, actually a lot more intelligent than her father ever gave her credit for, created the app for his site and pitched it to him over his lunch one day. it was honestly one of the first times sabina can remember her father really paying attention to her in the longest time. it was also the proudest she’s ever seen him. 

the app was a big success! a whole new generation was using it and finding love, including one ms sabine reube. in the early days of the app launch sabine met her prince charming, christopher ‘kit’ johannson. he swept her right off her feet, and she fell HARD, and when they debuted their relationship it wasn’t long until they kind of became the face of the app?? like sabine’s father was the creator after all, the fact that his daughter found love on the app too was big news for a while. people followed their relationship and strived for something like that for themselves. sabine didn’t know it at the time but they were basically a walking advertisement, and her father was LIVING for that.

fast forward a bit and your girl went to yale for computer engineering and business (did her daddy’s status and money ease the way? maybe man, nepotism am i right) whilst kit went to harvard, they were long distance for a bit before they graduated and kit very publicly proposed (the whole thing was well recorded too, gotta get that gram), and then both sab and kit moved in together and both started working for their families respective companies. it was around then that sabine started to understand just how much and how often kit was cheating on her. it was a real wakeup call. 

sabine ended up breaking down to her father about her suspicions, and he basically ended up telling her to suck it up and think of the business. the fact was sabine and kit, the face of their new generation and one of the first successful couples from the app getting married and living happily ever after was amazing for the company. and the two of them calling the whole thing off just because of a little infidelity just wasn’t going to cut it. 

now once again, this is where sabine’s deep desire to be loved and accepted really bites her in the ass. this was one of the first times sabine’s father had ever really asked her for anything so... she did it. or at least she did her best to do it. she lasted until the wedding day around the time where she caught kit and her own mother (who she only invited out of a deep rooted need to actually know the woman who gave birth to her again) going at it in the coat closet of their wedding venue. yeah, at that point sabine pretty much snapped, blacked out, smashed a whole wedding cake over kit’s head, and took their honeymoon to venice on her own. she arrived at Aida&Stefano with running mascara in a ruined wedding dress trying to ask about a honeymoon suite. it was a whole mess, but you know what so is sab so at least she was on brand. 

NOW.

after sabina arrived she spent about a week mourning her failed almost-marriage and yk, destroyed family before she decided to fuck it all and reinvent herself. she desperately wanted to become someone new, someone unrecognizable from who she was before, even if it was only on the inside. so she cut her hair (the first step to every transformation) hardened everything soft about herself and made the irrevocable decision to become a bad bitch. she (mostly) succeeded. kind of. 

sabine basically curb stomped out the soft, hopeless romantic people pleaser in her and decided to become someone more unsympathetic. someone who puts her own needs first instead of burning herself up to keep others warm (cause what good has that ever done her before?). someone who people would be afraid to hurt but who wouldn’t even feel pain anyways. and to sum it up that person is a heartless bitch. or at least she tries to be.

i’m gonna stop here because this is already a lot longer than i wanted it to be and i haven’t even got to the other sections yet rip but you get the point i feel

PERSONALITY.  *feels nothing* mmm, don’t like that *feels something but like too much* mmm not a fan of that either 

most of this is tbd because i’m still developing her but

VAIN. the kind of girl who will file her nails or check herself out in the mirror while you’re talking to her. will reapply her lipstick in the rearview mirror of her car while she’s driving. checks herself out in any reflective surface, i mean i would too if i looked like bruna but Still 

KIND. even though sab tries to be a hard ass she’s probably the most loyal, generous, kind person you would ever meet deep down. like she puts on this persona of being heartless, but if anyone needs her she will be there for them. kind of hates that she’s such a softie sometimes but she can’t help it. 

EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE. doesn’t want to be hurt again and will do pretty much anything to avoid that. tries to keep people at arms length especially romantically. loves making friends though, and will indeed spoil them. 

HEADCANNONS.  who wants to hire me as their maid i’m not gonna clean im just gonna wear a cute maid outfit dust like 6 things and bend down a lot

has the vibes of that drunk rich aunt that’s always smoking like sexily as she looks far into the distance and wears like a super luxurious coat. will gossip with you. will buy you things your mom won’t. will cuss out your toxic father at the dinner table. that’s her energy.

unfortunately actually does smoke. i hate 

okay fun fact, the only reason sabine went to university for computer programming and business was because she felt her father wanted her to. she honestly has no real passion for the subject and just wanted to use her talent to make her father as proud of her as he was on the day she debuted that app to him. but now that making daddy proud isn’t like the only thing occupying her entire brain sabine like is like ??? wait what do i actually want to do with my life ??? and it took her a while to figure it out but after a while she fell back on one of her passions, art. she’s actually making a graphic novel aimed towards young adults about a modern day hades and persephone vibe, kind of about a girl who falls in love with the grim reaper and the lengths she goes to to chase after her (yes it is a Lady Reaper) into the depths of hell,,, it’s wild. she’s very proud of it but also kind of shy about it tbh. her go to critic is georgio, because she knows that little shit will be honest and yk what she respects that. 

but when it comes to making actual money your girl turns to cam work most of the time, because well. at the very least it’s quick, easy, and semi discreet. and sometimes she gets something out of it too. she figures it’s a win win, and she’s been doing it for about a year now, mostly because she absolutely refuses to use any of her father’s money. 

is allergic to cucumber. 

has a different 'relationship’ like every week or so, along with a few one night stands peppered in. unfortunately still attracted to people who are bad for her (kit for example was an asshole and a cheater and DEFINITELY conservative like she messed up on that one), but is also very afraid of falling in love again and letting herself get hurt, so she normally doesn’t let things last too long before she starts self sabotaging. 

if you ever catch sabine with like... her nails growing out or her nail polish chipped, something is wrong. like something is deeply wrong. sabine will have her nails done in the middle of the apocalypse, the only reason they would be less than perfect is if she is having a breakdown. always has colour on her nails, and usually it’s a shade of red, purple, or black. 

always has wild ass stories to tell about her tinder dates or one night stands and will tell them without shame for your entertainment. is a great storyteller honestly, a talent she got from her mother but she doesn’t want to admit that. 

fun fact, her mother mariah was PISSED when hector got rich AFTER she left him and tried for years to sue him or something but no dice. she was so angry and vengeful over the whole thing that she took the opportunity of being invited to her daughters wedding to get back at her husband where it hurt, his business. thus sleeping with kit. didn’t really think about how her daughter might feel about the whole thing because she was yk blinded by rage, but that’s just how mariah is so i mean,,, rip sabina. 

shops when she’s sad, or happy, or angry, or confused sdkjdsj will use any excuse to shop, and at this point she has more clothes than she knows what to do with. her style can be kind of out there at times, but she will let you borrow things though. 

she has a cat named momo. yes that is inspired by her being the peach skeleton. also has a parrot named poe i think. i also have the urge to give her a snake but... i will resist. so sabine wants a snake for sure 

her favourite colours are black and red

she is a horrible terrible driver. don’t drive with sabine unless you’re an adrenaline junkie or like want to die tbh 

her dad 100% set up the relationship between kit and sabine as a pr stunt, but sabine doesn’t know that yet and when she finds out her father used her like that ooh boy things are gonna get wildt. as it is now sabine just thinks she disappointed him and it’s kind of eating her alive. half the reason she’s staying here is because she doesn’t want to face him or yk her old life anymore. her father is so caught up in the shame she caused him that he hasn’t even tried to call her after the whole thing and the one time sabine got hella drunk and called him all he did was tell her what a disappointment she was and ask when she was coming back to work so we love ~parenting~

WANTED CONNECTIONS. girls will “🥺🥺🥺🥺” their way out of everything

close friends please and thanks, best friends also please, uh, can i get some awkward one night stands that avoid each other at all cost, can i get a neighbour who’s ear sabine is always talking off in the hallway between their rooms even tho they just want to go home but can’t because sabine is Oversharing, maybe a flirtationship, but also i would love an enemy (it could be for a ridiculous reason or a completely valid reason but either way please give it to me), someone she goes out dancing/partying with at piccolo, a sibling like relationship, a confidante, someone who she trusts to read her comic and maybe even do some linework, and absolutely anything else okay my brain is fried rn but i want it all! please like this and i will slip and slide into your dms <3

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #231

too lazy to even think of song lyrics to put, just have this

Do bridges make you nervous? Somewhat. Are there any movies that you find so dumb, you find funny? Aha, Napoleon Dynamite. Do you have any older siblings? Four + one I don't know. How often do you vacation? Pretty much never. Are you currently having any cellular problems? My phone is ACTUAL horse shit. Have you ever tried to meet up with someone from online? With Sara, multiple times now. :') It'd be fantastic if when I go to South Africa I can meet Shaylee when I visit to the KMP, and my other friend Alyssa knows how badly I wanna meet Mark, so she insists on me going with her one day if he ever goes back to PAX East. I'd love to meet Connie, too. If you could have any car right now, what would you want exactly? Eh, I don't know car types. Something medium/smallish (I don't want very small for safety reasons) that's either burnt orange or red and just pretty and sleek. Do you think it’s cruel to leave a live fish to die in an ice box? Um???????? YEAH????????????????? Have you ever done anything sexual with someone of the same sex? Yeah. Do you collect issues of a certain magazine? No. Have you ever pawned anything off at a pawn shop? Nah. Do you have stomach abs? Ha, I wish. Do you know anyone who is trying to physically impersonate a celebrity? No, but oh my god, so my friend Leon, right? He looks UNCANNILY like Leon Kennedy (WEIRD name coincidence????) from the Resident Evil series so much that he dressed as him one day. The resemblance is fucking unbelievable, especially when his hair was longer in the front. Do you have the Bakery Story app? Haven't heard of it. Do you watch Sister Wives? Haven't heard of that, either. How do you feel about polygamy? It's definitely not for me, but if it's KNOWINGLY between a consenting, happy group of people, you do you, man. Just hardcore practice safe sex. Have you ever seen a shuttle launch? No. What would your parents say is the worst thing you’ve ever done? I haven't got a clue. I'd assume Mom would probably say me texting her "fuck you" even though she deserved it. Dad, probably the letter I wrote him after the divorce. Are we having signs of the apocalypse? I don't even remember the Biblical signs besides like, swarms of locusts and humanity's focus shifting to materialism. I say rather we're having actually scientific signs of a mass extinction coming in the next few centuries, probably, or sooner. Historically, we're extremely overdue for one, anyway. Global warming, the ozone, overpopulation, pollution... you know, all that jazz. We're killing the earth. Would you rather see The Blue Man Group or Fear Factor live? Blue Man Group. Do you have any vintage clothing? Man, I wish. Are you glad to accept any certain person’s hand-me-downs? "As long as it fits and it’s like, clean, I guess?" <<<< This. Have you ever bought anything at Rue 21? Yeah, I like that store. The graphic tees section, at least. What color of colored contacts would you like to have? Like, purple or something. NO, cyan. Gimme a Manson feel. What’s on your bed? Me, Teddy, Roman, my laptop and mouse, my pillows, sheets, blanket, phone... Your floor besides furniture? My bookbag and purse. Wires. Shoes. Your dresser? My meerkat collection, along with some other plushies. The top shelf in your closet? I have no clue. Are there any dead stuffed animals in your house? Uh, you mean taxidermy? No. I am viciously against hunting "trophies." HOWEVER, I'm deeply into vulture culture and have mixed feelings about making art of NATURALLY deceased wildlife... A part of me says that's disrespectful, and then the other says it's very honoring and respectful, to immortalize an animal's beauty as art after experiencing a good life. It's something I semi-want to get into, but again, I'm torn on my thoughts about it. Do you know anyone who goes fishing, but doesn’t like fish? Do you mean like, eating fish? I'll fish with Dad if he invites me (I otherwise stopped as I don't support it if not necessary for food, but this has always been my and Dad's "thing"), but I hate fish as food. If you mean they don't enjoy fish as animals, I don't think so. What’s the best prize you’ve won on an amusement park/carnival game? I don't have a clue. Have you ever done anything sexual in a school? No, besides simple kisses. Have you ever been indoor skydiving? No. Would you have any interest in going on a cruise? No. Being out in the ocean scares me. Have you ever been to a Chinatown in any of the cities you’ve been to? No. How old was the oldest person you’ve dated? Maybe like, five years older. Do you know anyone who has their own podcast? No. Have you ever been to couple’s counseling? No. How many children do you want, and how did you decide on this number? None. I decided because 1.) I would be a terrible mother, 2.) I'm not putting anyone's well-being above my own ever again, 3.) I'm not dedicating the remainder of my life trying to raise someone who might end up not even caring about me, and 4.) they're fuckin expensive and I've been poor my whole life and will do almost anything to keep my bills and expenses in general as low as possible. Where did your last kiss take place? The airport. Did you often read for fun when you were a kid? Oh, definitely. I loved reading. ^ What were some of your favorite books? Little-little kid books included Stellaluna, What Makes a Rainbow?, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, The Rainbow Fish, 10 Minutes 'Til Bedtime... a lot. As like an elementary student, I was really into the Magic Tree House and Hank the Cowdog series. Then in middle school, Warriors dominated my bookshelf. Are you more of a visual learner or an auditory learner? Visual. Do you have any dietary restrictions? No. Do you prefer Google Maps, Apple Maps, Waze, or something else? I've never used any. What is your favorite coffee brand? N/A What is your favorite tea brand? N/A Have you ever worn false eyelashes? No. I probably only will for maybe my wedding. How old does someone have to be for you to see them as an adult? 21 I guess. Do you ever ‘manspread’ when you sit down? Uh. I actually don't know. I don't pay attention. Which of your good habits has made the biggest positive difference in your life? Coming to understand I have to put myself first, probably. Or learning how to talk to myself gently. Have you ever dated someone who was very lazy? No. Have you ever turned down a job offer? No. Have you ever been fired from a job? No. I always quit too early for that, really. Do you overuse smileys? I don't think so. At least not anywhere near how I did as a pre-teen in the "LOL rANdoM!!!!!! XD" phase. Who is better; Madonna or Blondie? Idk. Who is better; Elton John or Billy Joel? BILLY!!!!!!! Name three website you visit every day: YouTube, Kalahari Manor, and deviantART. Have you seen all of the Jaws movies? Tyler and I watched the first one. I don't remember what I thought about it, really. Have you ever worn black eyeliner? "Yeah. That’s the only kind I wear." <<<< This. Have you ever worn blue mascara? No. That'd look weird on me. Hm, or maybe not. Maybe it'd bring out my blue eyes. Ever spiked your hair? No. How long have you had a computer? I don't have a clue. Have you ever written something, and published it on the internet? Well yeah? When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer) Hell, forever ago when I was at Colleen's with Girt and we played CAH. Can you play chess? Nope. When was the last time you read a book over 700 pages long? Shit man, no clue. I don't know if I ever have. Have you ever drank cherry Coke? GOOD STUFF Do you prefer using pens or pencils? Pencils, considering you can erase. I avoid using pens if I can. Have you ever skipped for a long distance? Maybe as a little kid? Are you excited for the holidays? Halloween was disappointing, as I did absolutely zip. I honestly don't care about Thanksgiving. We always just go have dinner with Ashley's bigot in-laws. I'm VERY hyped for Christmas 'cuz I'm probably gonna be with Sara!! Can you play any instruments? I played the flute for years, but I don't think I could remember how to now. Are you a Facebook addict? Nah. Are you afraid of stink bugs? YEAH. I hate beetle-like insects. Do you have a printer? Yeah. Does anyone own any embarrassing pictures of you? HAHAHAHA I HOPE SHE DOESN'T STILL HAVE IT, MY FRIEND ONCE TOOK A PICTURE OF ME IN THE MIDDLE OF EATING A HOT DOG AND I JUST REALLY HATE IT. Do you still live at home? Yeah. Are you currently enrolled in college? Yep. Do you care what others say about you? Way too much. Have you ever played Farmville? No. What is your favorite video game? Silent Hill 2 and Shadow of the Colossus. What song represents your life the best? "Get Up" by Mother Mother makes me think of myself A LOT. Are you into anime? Yeah. Name one movie that has made you cry more than once. The Notebook. Always. Do you watch the Disney Channel? Not anymore. Do you swear? Way too much. Do you overthink things? You wouldn't BELIEVE how much I do. What’s the largest animal you’ve ever had as a pet? A fuckin ginormous black lab until Ashley moved out. He wasn't even full-grown. Do you own any kind of helmet? No. What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? As a kid, I was running on the gravel road and slipped and fell. I scraped my knees to the point of pus coming out. It took a loooong time to heal. I cried SO fucking loudly. Bad, bad memory made only worse because Dad got so annoyed by it that he yelled at me to shut up. Happy beyond words he changed so much after the divorce and stopped drinking. What is something you like to have conversations about? MARK and other YouTubers I love to an unreasonable height, meerkats, vidya games I enjoy, RP, bands I love... What all is in the trunk of your car? I don't have a clue. Do you ever put fruit on your cereal? EW no. I hate that shit. How do you usually celebrate your favorite holiday? By doing nothing, lately. I don't have anywhere to go, so no point in even dressing up. Plus I can't afford costumes. When was the last time you drove something other than a car or truck? Uh. I have zero clue. Have you ever eaten/drank something and then realized it was past the expiration date? Probably at some point. Do you own any jewelry containing your birthstone? I have an amethyst angel pin from my grandmother. When I was in high school and going through my most suicidal phases, I wore it on my shirt underneath my hoodies. What is something unusual that annoys you? Hm. Well, I think this resonates with a lot of people at least to a mild degree, but it really angers me when people don't put their shopping carts back and just sit them in/by a parking spot. Fucking lazy as hell. Does mind over matter work for you? Rarely. What was the last thing you were invited to? No clue. Well, besides the obvious things like my niece and nephew's b-day parties, I don't know. What item should never be shared? Stealing the last person's answer: your toothbrush. What do you usually order at Taco Bell? A cheese quesadilla and fiesta potatoes. Sometimes the cinnamon delight things instead of the potatoes. Have you ever sat all the way through Gone With the Wind? No. Does drinking alcohol make you act more like your true self? I don't know if it's my "true" self, but I'm more extroverted and calmer. Have you ever googled a name and found somebody? Uhhhh so this is probably so incredibly creepy, but I jumped through hoops finding Jason's landline a few days before my suicide attempt because I was absolutely desperate to talk to him. It was in the dead of night and his sweetheart mom picked up and spoke with me for like two whole hours trying to calm me down. Jason was asleep, apparently. I miss that woman. She was so patient and gentle that night. Okay I'm honestly getting pretty emotional recalling that night so MOVING ON. What is your favorite possession? My iPod, really. I've had it since middle school and has 1k+ songs on it that I, like an idiot, am too lazy to back up... soooo when it dies, which it's WAY overdue to do, I will probably tear the world in two. What makes you feel like you are young again? Laughing hysterically. Especially when I do this little squeaking sound. Girt pointed it out all the time and since then I've actually paid attention to it and it's fuckin cute tbh. Are you picky? You. Don't. Even. KNOW. You have one wish, what would it be? World peace. How tall is the person you like? Shorter or taller? She's just like two inches shorter at 5'2''. How tall was the tallest person you’ve dated? Fucking hell, Girt was AT LEAST 6', I'm sure taller. I only reached his chest. How many foreign friends do you have? Oh boy, plenty. Well, I'd say most are acquaintances, but still. I've been on the Internet too long. In which countries do they live? European countries and Australia are the ones I know off the top of my head. What was your dream birthday party as a kid? Hmmm, probably going skating with my friends. What’s the most interesting story you’ve never told anybody? I don't know. What’s the most complicated meal you’ve cooked? Nothing. Have you ever come up with your own game? As kids, my sisters and I did a lot. What is something you value a lot in your life? Having a home, food to eat, a family that loves me... the basics that unfortunately many people don't have. Whose hand did you hold last? Sara's. What was the last thing you planted? Habanero peppers, I think. What or who was the last thing you gossiped about? *shrugs* When's the last time you helped a senior citizen somehow? Probably by holding doors open? What's the most selfless act you have done? Probably compromising my mental health to help others. I dunno. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? wtf no get out of mah swamp Are you clumsy? If so, how? I'm a newborn deer ffs. I bump into and trip over shit every day. How many Lidls are there in your town? None. I think. I think the closest is in the next town over. How do you like your favorite beverage? Cold and freshly opened 'cuz carbonation. Are you going to any concerts this summer? Ozzy Osbourne is very likely and I am NOT over it even though that was decided forever ago. Have you ever been to a concert? Once. What do you do when you can’t escape thoughts of your ex? I have PTSD from that relationship, getting away from those thoughts isn't a thing until my brain decides it's over it. Like I mainly just look for a distraction, but honestly, the only thing that seems to be truly effective is time or sleep. Do you watch any TV shows where the setting’s a hospital? I enjoy The Good Doctor, but I've talked about my disinterest in TV plenty. Did your first real significant other change you at all? HI HAVE YOU HEARD OF THE BREAKUP??????????????? Are you waiting to have sex until you’re married? Nah, not anymore. I broke that "promise" anyway through total cheat methods or whatever you want to call them, but I'm ultimately glad I thought I was obeying abstinence through that time considering honestly with how serious we were and how impulsive I was, I genuinely wonder if I would've wound up pregnant. Let's NOT IMAGINE THAT ROUTE. How many schools have you been to? Six. What’s your favorite color to wear? Black. Isn’t it lovely when your S/O smells good? I mean yeah, would anyone answer "no"???? Who’s your favorite actor? Mark is an official actor now don't even fuckin try me about this Who can make you laugh no matter what? *points up* + Sara and Game Grumps. Has a movie ever made you cry? Which one(s)? The Notebook, A Walk to Remember, Titanic, Old Yeller, The Lion King, Coco, Finding Dory, Johnny Got His Gun... man, a lot. I'm a baby when it comes to movies. Do you keep a list of movies you want to watch so you don't forget? No. What was the last song you heard for the first time and enjoyed? It was one of Highly Suspect's new songs. I think it was called "Snow White." What do you prefer -- the original fairy tales, or the Disney versions? Disney. Would you like more film adaptations of traditional fairy tales? Yeah, I enjoy them. Are there any comic books you'd like to see made into a movie? I don't read 'em. Are there any comic book movies you wish had been better? ^ Have you watched the Good Omens series yet? Thoughts? No. Who are some of your favorite female fictional characters, and why? Yrel from World of Warcraft is a fucking badass that needs to come back, I love Heather Mason from Silent Hill 3 with her being a realistic, relatable, and headstrong female protagonist that takes no shit, Bayonetta is my Mommy like have you seen that girl work (she served as some of my first evidence I wasn't straight, actually), I love Cynder from The Legend of Spyro saga with her personality overall and story... there's a lot I love. OH! Ellie from The Last of Us is impossible to not mention. It's beyond debate she's one of the toughest females in video game history, and it was interesting to watch her grow up in a post-apocalyptic world where horrors and tragedy were so normal. Something you didn't like that happened in one of your fave shows/books? GINGA DENSETSU WEED SPOILER: I will forever be livid Jerome died sobs I loved him more than I love myself. THE OUTSIDERS SPOILER: Dally's death devastated me. A character (in anything) you wish hadn't been killed off? Vol'jin's death in WoW was fucking stupid and entirely anticlimactic. Make the guy warchief & then Blizz doesn't know what to do with him and lets trash kill him, such shit writing, look guys I'm fuckin tilted about- What was the last video you saw that made you smile? Oh my god, I watched a clip of Shane Dawson at the Mall of America with Jeffree today, and he was physically in a state of shock, entirely speechless, and in tears. My lips were about to split my face in half smiling and almost crying. He deserves all he's getting right now beyond words. What's something exciting that's happened recently? A Heist With Markiplier was the best thing that ever happened to me ok. What about something upsetting? My grandma going downhill so fast. Cancer cells are now clearly visible in her blood. Do you have any calluses on your feet? So possibly TMI so look away, but I used to walk SO MUCH that my feet, especially my big toes, have the thickest calluses you could probably imagine. They bother me so much that I want to see whatever kind of doctor that can get rid of the damn things. Nothing I've ever done has helped get rid of them. I've CUT areas off in hopes of them going away, but it always heals BACK into a callus???? What was your last big purchase? Teddy's vet visit. Have you ever eaten grits? Grits are disgusting. What is the name of your YouTube channel, if you have one? 0zzkat. Do you wear the same shirt and shorts multiple times before washing? It depends on how long I wore the shirt and if I sweat. You'd never see me in shorts. What color is your favorite lip gloss? I don't use gloss. How many different states have you lived in? Just one. Are you allergic to bees? No. What color is the rim around your bedroom mirror (if applicable)? Black. What is your favorite flavor of saltwater toffee? I don't know if I've ever tried that. Have you ever vacationed on an island? No. What does your favorite bikini look like? Remember how I said you wouldn't see me in shorts? That goes even more for bikinis. What flavor was the last slushee you had? Strawberry limeade.

[flameontheotherside]

My Own Ascension & The End

It’s my understanding that everyone's is different. I don’t take the lists people make seriously. They do have SOME merit but not real particular order. It’s kind of a waste of time to worry about it IMO.

I’ve always been kind of intuitive like from the time I was aware. Seen and talked to dead people and see deceased animals like my mom’s dead dog. That was the last time I think I saw plain as day. Seeing them creeps me out. It still creeps me out and I DON’T want it back. God can keep it. Nuh-uh, no thanks, bye!

My skepticism change over time.

I’ve spoken to psychics kind of obsessed with why I felt the need to find this “person” and why did it feel urgency. The urgency had gone away when Erik died. It was later that everything each psychic said to me was pretty true from meeting him by a body of water (in my dreams he was associated with water), that I had some kind of connection with some kind of “love sector” (Yeah WTF is right), I specifically asked about this person who I called my “long-distance boyfriend”.  That the one I was looking for was going to leave and there was nothing that could be done about it. This was around the summer right before his death. I crawled into my closet and cried my eyes out. I just knew it was him. That I also failed to find him. That my life was over and I literally felt like dying. What was I living for? Like what’s the point?

After his death I felt my life was over.

The urgency I felt to find him had gone away. Since I just turned 20, I’d been sneaking alcohol and getting shitfaced at karaoke bars and house parties. I just wanted to forget about him! I covered up my pain with wise-cracks, un-serious relationships, being a drama queen, doing things I should have gotten arrested for, and getting high. I didn’t care if I lived. Even while medicated, I just didn’t care. I picked up a few “boyfriends” and I felt nothing. I only did it because I was starting to see my friends dwindle away one by one with families of their own. So to forget about the pain, I tried to have serious relationships. I became in denial that Erik was dead. Like the clock had long since stopped ticking. I became a wreaking time ball. I realized these men were just mistakes. I didn’t really love him because somehow I loved that thing which followed me around and I did feel him with me for real. I just was afraid to find out. 

My experience didn’t begin to accelerate until Erik died. 

I remember laying down and being freaked out seeing my chakras open up. I felt and saw each one. I wasn’t very educated on chakras. When it became too much, I ran out of my room like a bat out of hell or I wasn't really educated any of the stuff. But I knew a little. Since then I had repetitive dreams seeing him exactly as he was. Again, only I didn’t know it was him until much later. The same dream of being at some kind of pool party, beach, lake or whatever. I was with friends I never seen before I only found out where my friends from “home”. It was always fun but sometimes the water was murky, shallow or deep. It’s symbolism on my spirituality. I was teetering on and off “the path” since the dreams because. The water had much to do with where I was in life. If I was miserable, it was shallow and murky, murky, or just shallow...You get the idea. The water got deeper I got close to meeting Erik. I remember being told to get in a few times. I also remember when I was about 12-13 I was afraid of deep water because I almost drowned. But I had a dream that an Angel had been with me at a friends house. I was instructed to just jump and I did. Since I survived I loved deep diving. Fun as shit. Not sure if it has much to do with it. I’m hearing a no but I’m including it anyway.

Lemme give you the process...

Around ‘12-ish I bought a pendulum with the idea of using it like I do now. Things took a turn for the worst soon after I bought it. It broke and I didn’t have time or energy to try it anyway. Not until a couple years later at a better time in my life. My apartments were haunted and that’s when I got the sense someone was following but it wasn’t bothersome. Most of the time it was comforting. I did feel him around at the home I grew up in but it wasn’t as prevalent. The dreams were still happening. In ‘13-ish I had the dream I wrote about visiting home in The Realms and Erik bombarded me about my spiritual journey and how I didn’t want anything to do with it. It’s still vivid in my mind like a memory. I really fought over how I didn’t want to incarnate. This was as my higher-self. I looked different and felt different. Now I do see her as my higher self the same as in the dream. Trippy.

Fast forward to ‘16...

Times were hard. I lost my job and the money I was making. It wasn’t really a good job anyway. I realize while on my medications, I was able to connect better. As in my intuition was better understood because they kept me calm and centered. But that wasn’t realized until I was back on meds and able to look back at the times I was medication. I also realized that if my “abilities” to be intuitive went away while off my meds, it might be alarming. But it was impossible to sit still or concentrate long enough to give a shit off of them! So anyway, shortly before I got on my meds I had a dream about Erik. But I started my meds again and noticed the dreams coming it more and more. 

Early ‘17 I asked God to have my abilities back feeling that there was something I needed to do. Like I have a real purpose and it had something to do with my abilities that have taken a temporary backseat. Did some researching to find out what I can do to have my abilities back and got back in to reading my cards regularly. I saw a movie I’ve seen so many times basically about TFs (In Your Eyes) and thought how cool it would be. Ironically it would my experience with Erik in some kind of way but generally the same. Only he’s dead...

It got intense in spring/Summer ‘17.

Over an argument with my ex, he got me baker-acted. I didn’t know Erik was my TF yet. I remember how cool it would be to talk to him while in there. Two years later, this year, while in the hospital I learned I really could talk to him without my pendulum. It’s kind of cute I made a pendulum board “On The Go!” LMAO by drawing one and taking a picture of it so that in the case I can’t concentrate, I can whip out my penny and dangle that shit above my phone. Just for some clarification. I don’t do it all the time. It’s just sometimes I’m not too confident with discernment without my board and I’m not allowed back in the shelter dorms until 4pm *rolls eyes*. 

Okay, we are getting side-tracked!

Learning a skill.

At first, I was watching a lot of paranormal shit and depressed finally tough enough to look for proof as to why I was having this “thing” following me. No matter how comforting it was, it did cause somethings to happen around no matter where I lived and of course only me and maaaaaaybe a few witnessed it. Annoying. I collected pendulums from Ebay and wore them just for shits and giggles. Mostly shits. Ew that’s gross. Anyway so I watched some paranormal shit and remembered,

Hey, I still have my pendulums and a pile of crystals hanging around the “alter” in the headboard behind the mattress!...And a chain!

Reminds me of that Fleetwood Mac song. Kind of accurate. After firing up some sage in my condo --Really! The damn thing nearly caught fire and I’m sure with winds open I was some kind of witch which at the time didn’t necessarily believe in. Pagans and Wiccans were bullshit to me. Even to some level psychics too! How ironic that NOW I happen to be one of those nut-jobs. Go figure. I did my opening and closing rituals to make sure “the door” was closed. I ALWAYS held the intention to be speaking with Erik and much later my grandmother and God would be an important role.

We continued as above pretty much for a while. Using my pendulum was easier, I was able to predict the next letter, then the next word. We really played tug-o-war. I tried to pull the penny to a different letter and he would move it to spell, “Stop doing that!”. LMFAO it was HILARIOUS!!!!! But that’s how I really knew for sure for sure this was for real for real!

Learning about “home”.

It was eye-opening because I remembered the dream I had years ago about returning home. Erik bombarded me with the task about doing what I came to earth to do. Something about his role as well. It didn't know Erik at the time but intuitively I knew that I knew him. There was a familiar-ness . The same I got from in him; the beach and pool parties. In the realms are pools. What I call pools of mana. In video games especially in MMOs there is Mana used to boost up your Magic (sometimes spirit or intellect) Points or MP. 

Out of the blue he called me by a different name, “Vanessa”. Then I remembered asking him what my spirit name was a while back. He had told me “nessa”. To me it sounded like Nestle Tollhouse or some shit like I wasn’t really ready for. Well I was kind of shocked because I told him to call her butt-uh (inside joke) so I put both together and asked about her or my role is back home. Turns out I’m part of some counseling group from the realm of Love. OOOOOoooOOoooooo! Oh my my my! lmao So any way I had not only my past lives to pound out, but also I needed to find out more about the realms and my role as what I call a “Galactic Guardian” or Starseed (see tag below)

Anyway, So we continued the healing process starting with our past lives. We had three of them and we literally looked at all three and healed them. It’s like going to the therapist and laying down and shit. Only because I actually go in to hypnotic state and see these events happening. We pick apart all of the difficult situations in each relationship as bother and sister, husband and wife, and gay lovers. *In Kevin Hart voice* Bing bang boom. Very intense all together. Very much like therapy. Erik goes all sort of sarcastically, 

“...And how does that make you feel?” 

With a notepad in one hand and a pen in another!  He always finds a way to crack me up. He’s my own personal comic relief. Sometimes it’s funny and sometimes he just goes to far. Well so do I. Guess it’s some sort of “karma” everyone talks about. *rolls eyes* Whatever.

2018 is all kind of a blurr and I met “God”

Things really didn’t kickoff until summer/fall. Now, I was at a point I wasn’t using my note pad anymore to keep track of our conversations. They were sort of stored in this crazy blob in my unsightly skull. We were still covering our past lives and when it ended, it was time to meet “God”. It really happened when I wanted to know that oracle cards Doreen Virtue had to add to my collection. I only found out she turned away from this kind of spiritual stuff toward (for lack of a better term in my ignorance) being a “Jesus Freak” and there’s absolutely nothing with it. Being that I looked up to her, it brought me back down to earth. In-spite of the safely precautions and measures before each session, was I consorting with demons? I’m I wrong? Is Erik a Demon? I started to feel my chest tighten and it was getting harder to breathe. I felt like I was going to have a heat attack and immediately closed the Chrome window starting at me dead in the face. 

I’ve met Angels Raphael and Micheal..Oh and my Guardian Angel, Josana. Both Archangels are just described. Micheal (means God-like) is a lot like but God “LITE”. A watered down level of God (Sorry Mike)! Raphael is like a physician you see for your check ups. He gives me dietary advice and encourages me to keep my health. Literally while having a panic attack, he measured my heart-rate and assured me that there was nothing wrong. It’s like Raph gives me the veggies and Mike leans over behind me making sure I eat everything on my plate. They are no different than getting their help or advice through angel oracle cards made by Doreen Virtue. It’s funny because i can recall a oracle card that almost matches what they really say to me. Creepy right?

“Yes this is your heavenly father, Jehova.”

OK. Everyone has a name for “God” because of my religious background growing up as a Jehova’s Whitness. Everyone has their own idea or name for “source”. Meeting God wasn’t on the top of my list because I was afraid. I had not been a “good christian” and I’ve fell off the path long ago. In my selfish mind I thought if there was a God I wouldn’t suffer the way I have my whole life. I’ve been through what everyone goes through. But in my mind, my life was enough to make some people want to die. Erik found how much I suffered realizing how the way he left was trivial. If it had to be between us to be put out of their misery, it should have been ME! But I couldn’t no matter how much pain I was in, I couldn't do it. I was afraid of going to Hell. Even though I didn’t really believe in God I always thought with my luck, God or not, my ass is going to burn forever in fire and brimstone. Then out of curiosity i wanted to know demons too. If Angels and benevolents exist there must be demons. Well I did meet them. If you remember, I’ve met these assholes and sent them away. Now that I know the difference I feel free-er and well educated.

God was right there IN MY FUCKING CONDO...

Immediately I was scared as shit like that moment you know you’ve done something back and you are hiding in the closet, except I was basically frozen on my futon. It felt like that. God is very much like Fem and Masc energy together so obviously this means he doesn’t have a Twin Flame. So he can be that honest-god (Hahahah) honest father that tell you like it is without sugar-coating it. I mean he literally in my hissy-fit over something stupid, he said I was, “Acting like a child and it’s time I have patience or I can forget about the things he’s got in store for me.” By the way he really did come through! There were moments I asked for things and they happened! A new bag, art supplies, new pillow, a hat. Some I got EXACTLY how I wanted them! I’ll never forget it. Law of Attraction IS REAL and it’s like God gives it to you like Oprah gives out prizes! 

God forgave me of course and basically I have a good heart. It’s apparent to him how honest I was. He assured me everything leading up to then was genuine. He encouraged me to re-read the bible as much as I can. I’ve got a children's version of it over and over. The book of Enoch, Ester --both not in the bible, and Job are my faves. For some reason that version is the best way I can understand especially with the pictures. I hate when Christians tell he how I need to read the bible. Like leave me alone. At least I’m reading or listening to it. Seriously sometimes I can’t have conversations without someone taking out their bible and tell me how to read it. When I say I really can’t just sit there all day trying to read AND interpret it, I’m doing so the best way I can. It means I can’t do it. I do it in my own way and that’s all that matters to God. I understand what I understand and HOW I understand it. Like the documentaries about the bible and it’s archaeological proof that events really happened. The great food is a big one. That was the one documentary that got me thinking twice about being an Atheist. Now, I consider myself a Gnostic Theist considering everything I have learned about The Realms (not exactly spirit realms) and where I and SOME of my friends are from. Otherwise I’d have to be Gnostic.

As my pendulum swung, so did my head. 

In every other word I was able to “hear” them. He would let me know by going “ding!”. It was alarming (no pun intended) to figure out all of a sudden I knew what he was say as every other word kind of appeared in my head. I remembered this was part of my own ascension. We had merged and everything was happening so fast. So by the end of ‘18 I was literally beginning to hear him just by listening to the frequency of 110hz playing in my speakers. Then I started to hear him when there ever was a steady beat like in footsteps, the sound of rain, when I was washing a plate, every sylable was like:

It’s--Oh--Kay--I--M--Not--Go--ing--to--hur--t--you!

I was talking to myself and I heard him! I freaked out. As in I really thought I was going insane. It didn’t want it. I kept saying to him that I wasn’t ready! I got over my fear and before you know it, I’m having conversations with him while watching a Netflix and YouTube! It was like I had him in my headset. We had the kind of long-distance relationship I seeked before he died. Once, I forgot he was dead. When it sunk in again, It had me by the ovaries and I dare say I fell apart because I wished he was alive. By ‘19 without my pendulum I can hear him in my right ear. When he’s yelling, the sound carries over to my left side. It really feels like someone is screaming in your ear in a concert hall. You can imagine the kind of psycho-happy he was when I could finally hear him! We even sing together!

But then I couldn’t get him to STFU! At first it was creepy, then cool, then I’m being tested on my ability to shut him off! Since we merged and God married us, everything was so fast it was hard to keep up. So overwhelmed, God and my Granny would visit to encourage me to move forward and that I’m not doing anything wrong. Through the hard times happening between Vince and I they stood by me always. Erik and I communicate as though time wasn’t even a thing. We are two-peas-in-a-pod! He’s my Twin Flame, Spirit Guide, best friend and my “spirit spouse”. 

Erik said that in my ascension the last step is being able to see him.

 I long since said I didn’t want to. It was hard and painful (That’s what she said!) to know he’s dead. Well he forced me to by sending in dude that kind of resembled him up until we got to Dean Winchester. I was like:

“Ummmm, errrrrr, no, sorry but no way man. You have to be joking. You are a far cry from him. I just don’t see it!”

So of course he wouldn’t shut up because of course he was going to annoy me AGAIN by embarrassing myself around dudes. Oh god I’ll never really forget the first time I nearly died. I wasn’t ready. I looked like I had just crawled out of bed! Why of why hadn’t I been given notice. My third-eye would pop-off when he was getting my attention. Sure enough I look up and hide behind Vince gasping for air. Not quite a dopple-ganger but good enough to freak me out. He wanted me to make that correction as he’s kind of hovering over my shoulder as he always does.

Anyway *rolls eyes* So i watched a few to find, wow I guess he’s right especial the parts he loves his car, music like Metallica, ACDC, ect...Oh yeah and how he thinks he’s “adorable”. Well I don’t think he’s adorable....I’M ADORABLE, BITCH! There can only be MEEEEEE! But he makes a point there. Being we are Twin Flames that makes us both adorable. Sure, whatevs. I learned to gather up my ovaries and said, “fuck it”, I’ve seen and heard what he wanted me to and admitted yeah, sure, I give up, he wins. As always he gets what he wants. He’s totally salty I said that. No, he’s not a dick. He’s a pansy. He’s threatening to hit me with a wrench. Too bad he can’t do it for real but then again I can’t really bonk him on the head either. I get more satisfaction with physical contact...Oh god, ”That’s what she said!”. He’s a slick dick all talk and no action. 

I really feel like this hole experience makes a good story and a good lesson in  persistence, patience, and spiritual growth. It’s surprising to me that like on all “hobbies” I’m able to follow through on this journey as long as I have. The things that kept me doing this is the love and support from my friends here, Erik, Granny and God. Literally I asked for this and it’s like “Be careful of what you ask for” kind of thing except Twin Flames wasn’t in my vocabulary. The dreams and incidences that occurred leading me to him all were for a reason no matter how painful and torturous they were. I’ve never cried so much but I’ve never healed so much. This is like spiritual boot camp. My guides break my down to lift me up. I’m coming out of this process a stronger than before. I have to really thank my guides for all the things they put me through.

My own kind of ascension might be over now that I can see, hear, and even feel Erik. At least what he called our ascension process. It is to my understanding like our own individual spiritual journey, our own ascension process is different too. This is not a one size fits all gig. There is no right or wrong way. To bark around with, no this is this or that is that ( I’m guilty of it too...) is kind of silly if we are all individual and unique being on earth! It feel cool but as I’ve said before, just because this processed ended doesn’t mean our story or whatever we have is over. We both still have much to discover and share in our day to day life.

For those who have followed me through this,

Again, Thank you all!

[maknaesdancersrappers]

jaehyun + if by chance

i. baby dont like it

ii. does she know/she’s not me

song used: x

warnings: swearing / explicit words, unedited

a/n: y’all asked for ONE LAST installment for this and i’ll make it lengthy so it could be worth your time and read ((and holy shit it’s at 6.4k))

-

Graduating from college meant a lot of things for you. It meant new beginnings; you’d move away from your parents to start working on your own, it meant being independent, it meant making new friends.

It meant leaving Jaehyun behind.

Ever since that night you had confronted him in front of his girlfriend’s home, you never talked to him again. Even when both of you were in your circle of friends, you paid him no attention. For some reason, his girlfriend stopped coming with him when your circle of friends got together but you honestly only noticed when Winwin innocently pointed it out. Maybe Jaehyun told her to back off and she decided to stop hanging out with them, but really, you don’t care.

He also never talked to you again, but there were times when you’d catch him approaching you, only to turn away when you see him or he would just look at you, as if he was debating himself or always hesitant with his moves, and you would move away from him, escaping whatever conversation he wanted to spark up.

It was weeks of avoiding and dodging chances of being alone together, but you were able to graduate with what you forced yourself to believe was peace.

It’s been a couple of years since you’ve graduated and you have been jumping from job to job to find one that suited you the most. Among the guy friends you had back in school, you only kept in touch with Yuta since he lived closest and worked in the same area where your apartment was. He would eat out with you from time to time, depending on your schedules.

You had recently gotten passed a job screening and orientation for all the new applicants would be today at 10 AM. Something in your gut told you this was the job you’d be sticking to and Yuta, who all of a sudden declared to be your new best friend (not that you were complaining since he was all you got in the city,) decided to treat you dinner after the orientation.

Before you could even worry about where to eat, you had to get ready for the orientation. You dressed simply, opting for a smart casual outfit with a ‘no makeup’ makeup look. The building was a 15-minute Uber away and you were there with a few minutes to spare before the call time.

The receptionist directed you to the conference room where 3 other new applicants were already seated and talking amongst themselves. You greet them and introduce yourself as you take a seat at the long table with them.

You learn their names to be Miyoung, Jangmi, and Sora, and as it turns out, they’re all roommates.

“Don’t worry, we’re not the type to ostracize people.” Miyoung shrugs when she catches your expression after learning they were already close friends.  “Who knows, maybe you’d click with the last applicant.”

“There’s one more?” You eye the empty seat in front of you. “Well, she’s not gonna make a good impression if she’s not here in the next minute.”

“Maybe she took her time with makeup, I know someone in this room did.” Jangmi side eyes Sora, who flips her off.

Just then, the door opens and your chest constricts. She is definitely not a she.

Your mouth goes dry a little; he looked more mature, features a little more defined and body thicker with muscles under the fitting clothes he wore. His cheeks and ears red with embarrassment knowing he was almost late and he sported those dimples, smiling when he greets the other girls, only to falter when his eyes met yours.

Jung Jaehyun had become a man since you last saw him.

But then you are reminded of all the tears you have cried because of him, the pain you’ve suffered for being his side chick; for being his second option, so you collected yourself, sat up straight and swallowed hard. You had to prove that you’ve moved on.

As the girls introduce themselves one by one, you were faced with two options: either you greet him casually like the old friend he is, or you pretend you never knew him and just hope to god that he plays along. You thought it was petty to choose the latter, but you end up choosing that option when Miyoung finishes her introduction and looks over to you.

“I’m [Y/N].” You keep your composure despite hurriedly saying your name.

He looks taken aback with your reaction, minutely frowning before giving a polite smile. “My name is Jaehyun.”

As the other girls animatedly talk to him, trying to make him feel welcome since he’s apparently the only male applicant, you busy yourself on your phone. You send consecutive stressed text messages to Yuta, still typing in proper grammar and punctuation despite wanting to abuse the capslock out of your phone.

He doesn’t reply, obviously, because he’s at work but you hope he checks his phone during his bathroom breaks.

Jangmi tries to rope you into the conversation, but luckily for you, the HR head enters the room and starts the orientation.

During the tour of all 18 floors of the building, you kept your distance from Jaehyun, tagging right behind the HR head while he lingers at the back of the small crowd. You could feel him staring at you and the only you can do about it is ignore him and pay attention to what the HR was talking about.

The orientation ended at the cafeteria where all of you had a free late lunch before being divided into the teams you were sorted into. You mostly stuck with Miyoung, who was generally clingy upon meeting you, while Jangmi kept Jaehyun company through random observations during the tour.

The five of you ate at one table, talking about random things until the conversation was about relationships. All three of the girls were apparently taken, with both Sora and Jangmi being engaged, while Miyoung had a slow relationship with her boyfriend.

“How about you, [Y/N]?” Miyoung nudges you with her shoulder.

Caught off guard as you saw Jaehyun’s eyes flicker down to your phone when Yuta’s face comes on screen for an incoming phone call, you blurt out, “Y-yeah! I’m, uh, seeing someone.”

“Is that him?” She peers over your phone and frowns when the call ends, “Oh no, he dropped it.”

“Oh, don’t worry. He’s just checking up on me.” You guessed he’s read the 20+ messages you left him.

“Yuta, was it?” She ponders for a moment, “Is he Korean?”

You shake your head, “No, he’s Japanese. We met in college but only got together after graduation.” You were surprised with how steady your voice was while lying and even more so the fact you weren’t cringing at the thought of having Yuta as a boyfriend. The whole time you told your little lie, you haven’t spared Jaehyun a glance in fear of his reaction.

“Aw, that’s cute.” Sora comments, taking a sip from her water bottle. “How about you, Jaehyun?”

“Ah,” He sighs, “I’m single.”

This made you finally look at him. There was a tinge of pink on his cheeks as he pushed the contents of his rice bowl around with his chopsticks, avoiding the curious smiles of the other three.

“I don’t believe it. A face like that can’t be single.” Jangmi shakes her head, to which he shyly laughs at.

“I’ve been single since I graduated college.” His voice trails off and his gaze is set on you.

It doesn’t take you long enough to understand what he was trying to silently tell you. Anger bubbled inside you all of a sudden. Was he suggesting he had broken up with his girlfriend because of you? Was that the reason why she stopped showing up during hang outs or parties? What was he trying to say, that he chose you over her?

“Do you plan to look for love here then?” You don’t even know who suggested that because Jaehyun’s answer made your ears ring and his affectionate, but melancholic gaze made you glare.

“I was hoping it would find me.”

You’re years late, you wanted to scream.

Your phone rings and you thank the heavens that Yuta was calling you. “Excuse me, it’s probably about our dinner reservations for our anniversary.” You say in one breath and this time, you actually cringed. Who on earth tells that much information in one sentence to a bunch of people they just met?

They all congratulate you, sans Jaehyun, who simply stared with an unreadable expression.

You thank them before picking up the call and hurrying outside.

Yuta was hounding you with questions before you can say hello and to shut him up, you just tell him straight away, “I told him we’re dating.”

“You wHAT?!”

You wince at his screeching, pulling your phone away briefly. “I’m just as disgusted, don’t worry.”

“Then why’d you say we were dating? Do you honestly think he’d believe that I, of all people, would be dating someone seriously?”

“Hey,” You scold, “You’ve changed since your fuck boy days back in college, you need to give yourself more credit.”

“He doesn’t know that!”

“Then prove it to him later if he sees you! Kiss my forehead or something when you pick me up.”

“[Y/N].”

You grimace at his tone. “What?”

“You said you moved on.”

“I know and I have, it’s just…” You groan, “The other applicants asked me about my relationship status before him and I assumed he was still together with her. I didn’t want it to seem like I’ve been single and depressed all my life.”

“You are.” He rudely cuts in.

“You’re a dick, you know that?”

“No, I have a dick. And it’s my best asset.”

“Ew. Don’t be gross. I’ll see you later, oh and by the way, today’s our anniversary.”

When you went back inside, it was just time for you guys to be sorted out into your respective departments.

And lo and behold, you were in Marketing with Jaehyun.

The Marketing department head was a nice man, had a wrinkled, eye smile, but still looked young.. “Nice to meet both of you, I’m Jungsu and I should have prepared for both of you to do something, but it’s been such a crazy week that it slipped my mind that I had to give you guys your daily task.”

“Well, we can help alleviate you from some the work?” You suggest and Jungsu hums at the thought.

“It’s a mundane task, but I need some organizing and filing of the documents we’ve accumulated. Are you two sure about doing that?”

Once you’ve assured him that both of you are willing and okay with it, he leads you to a room full of metal organizers and a table overflowing with manila folders and envelopes. Jungsu leaves with another apology and you pick up the first folder on top of the pille, scanning through the papers.

As you look around to find the cabinet it’s supposed to go into, you hear Jaehyun clear his throat.

“Yuta-hyung?”

You don’t look at him and continue your task, “Yeah. He was all I had when I moved out here.”

That struck Jaehyun inside his chest. “But he’s…”

“He was.” You defend, turning back to the table and picking out another document to sort.

In the corner of your eye, you see him move and look through a manila folder. It was silent after that and it was only what felt like half an hour later when he breaks it with, “Are you happy?”

The pile of papers on the table lessened, but there were still a lot to file. You look up from the folder you were reading to look at him for the first time since both of you started working in the room. He looked genuinely curious, eyebrows a little scrunched and lips formed in a straight line.

Were you happy? You know he was asking about being with Yuta and obviously you don’t have an answer to that since the apparently-year-long relationship was just formed in a measly minute. So opted to answer in context of how you have been without him, per se. You open your mouth to answer but shut it close immediately, realizing you didn’t have an exact answer.

Were you?

After you graduated and moved away, you convinced yourself it was because you wanted to start fresh and new. However in reality, you just wanted to move away from him. The years without seeing and hearing of him had helped you forget about him, thinking you had finally moved on.

But seeing him now, having him so close, you’re starting to think you never actually did.

“Yes.” You croak out when you’ve stretched out the time for you to answer for too long. “I am.”

He nods, “I’m glad to hear that.” and he gives you one of the most sincere, yet heartbreaking smile you have ever seen grace his face--or anyone, for that matter.

And it pinched your heart to see it, so much so that you turned away, walking to a cabinet and stuffing the folder you were just reading inside. You take a deep breath, scolding yourself for being affected by it.

Until the table was cleared and the last file was sorted, you and Jaehyun had not exchanged anymore words. The silence was bearable and there wasn’t really any tension in the air because when Jungsu came in to tell you guys you could go home for the day, he didn’t comment on the atmosphere he walked into.

You met up with the girls at the elevator and boarded it with Jaehyun. They also didn’t seem to notice anything strange between you and him, choosing to talk about the software they had to work with under the graphics team.

Yuta was already at the lobby waiting for you, mindlessly scrolling through his phone as he leaned against a column.

You see Jaehyun visibly tense up when he sees him, but you quickly run up to Yuta to even care why he reacted that way.

He sees you, putting his phone down but not really looked like he was all that excited until his eyes catch sight of Jaehyun. He flashes that smile he was always known for, throwing his arms around you for a hug. “Hello, love.”

“Gross. Don’t call me that.” You whisper into his ear as you hug him back, making him chuckle.

“If you want to sell this, than deal with it.” He whispers back, kissing your forehead like you told him to. “Let’s go?”

You nod as you let him lead you away. You didn’t look back anymore, but you were able to catch the one thing you didn’t want to see.

Jung Jaehyun’s disappointed face.

-

“I still don’t get why we have to pretend to be a couple.” Yuta grumbles before slurping on the ramen he had ordered. “This is a great way for you and Jaehyun to have closure.”

“What if I don’t want closure?” You twirling your chopsticks into the noodles.

“Then you’re basically admitting you haven’t moved on.”

You grimace at Yuta, hating the fact he was right. “But if you only heard him a while ago! Saying ‘I was hoping love would find me’ while staring right at me! Does he think after all these years, I would still be in love with him?”

“Well, aren’t you?” He scoffs and you kick his shin under the table, eliciting a yelp. “Ow!”

“You’re being a horrible boyfriend!”

“Because I’m better at being your best friend!” He scowls, “Aha! Maybe that’s something Jae and I have in common! Or,” He follows up, seeing your eyes narrow and fist tighten around your chopsticks, “Not! Look, if you want my honest opinion, give the guy a chance. Maybe not in love, but maybe become friends again? Where’s the harm in that?”

“I could fall in love with him all over again.”

“[Y/N], you can’t fall into something you haven’t fallen out of yet.”

And you promptly kick him in the shin again.

-

When you return to work the next morning, you were given a cubicle to work in and you were glad that your work station was at least 4 cubicles away from Jaehyun. You had a scheduled ID picture taking before lunch with the others and while waiting for that, you browsed through previous reports and researches on sales and advertising in the computer’s files. Before you know it, someone was tapping your shoulder.

It was Jaehyun. “Hey, they’re calling us for our photos to be taken.”

“Oh, okay.” You quickly put the computer into sleep mode before following Jaehyun out.

And that was the only conversation you two had for the entire day.

Every day after that, the only interactions you had were greeting each other a good morning or goodbye when it was time to go home. Even during lunch, neither of you would talk to each other and let the Roommates, as you now called them, fill the silence up.

You would notice how he’d stop eating when one of the Roommates ask you about Yuta and do your best not to stutter over your lie. It would seem you were doing a good job at it since he seemed so affected by it. You felt powerful, for some reason, maybe because you were finally letting him experience what you had gone through because of him. It was mean, you have to admit, but a large part of you believes he deserves it.

The days fly by and they turn into weeks, mundane tasks turn into gruesome paperworks that started to pile up day after day. But all of the hard work and working overtime was paid off during the first pay day.

The Roommates suggested to go out for a drink and you agree. Jangmi had managed to rope Jaehyun in and by eight o’clock, all five of you were seated in a dingy booth and ordering shots. You could hold alcohol well, but that doesn’t mean your mouth would coordinate. You were a talkative drunk, amongst other traits alcohol can bring out of you. Jaehyun, as you remember, holds alcohol the best among your circle of college friends. He was a quiet, happy drunk, and you’ll know he’s reached his limit when his face and ears are red.

As the Roommates gossipped about the happenings in their department, you catch Jaehyun lazily smiling at you.

“What?” You ask, suddenly feel conscious about your appearance.

“Nothing.” He shrugs, “I’m just glad we met again.”

You cast a glance at the Roommates, but they didn’t seem to hear him over the music and their own voices. “Okay.”

“I’m also glad Yuta’s changed and is keeping you happy.”

Your fingers twitch around the shot glass, lowering your head. “Thanks--”

“But,” He cuts you off, making you look up at him through your lashes. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry about--”

It was your turn to cut him off, but instead of words, you bolted out the booth and made a beeline for the exit, leaving some money on the table before leaving. You can hear them call out for you, Jaehyun’s voice absent amongst them, and you guessed it was better that way.

-

The next morning, you run into Jaehyun in the break room, getting coffee for the hangover you supposed both of you had.

“Good morning.” He greets, like always.

“Morning.” You whisper, taking your mug and filling it halfway with the coffee from the maker.

Jaehyun hands you the fresh milk he had previously used. “You still like your coffee with half of it with milk?”

You nod, preparing your drink.

And you think he’d let you be, but he starts talking again.

“[Y/N], about last night--”

“Can we not?”

“But--”

“Jaehyun.”

“I just want to be friends again.”

You stare up at him, watching his face contort in a frustrated frown.

“I just… I just want to be friends again with you.” His voice was soft. “That’s why I wanted to apologize.”

Your lips part to reply, but he’s beaten you by talking again.

“But if you don’t want to, I respect that and--”

“No, we can be friends again.” You say without thinking and he pauses.

“Really?”

You sigh to yourself, it’s not like you can take back what you said, so you nod your head. “Yeah.”

Jaehyun smiles, the kind that makes his eyes into crescents, his nose scrunch, and his dimples appear. The smile that made you smile. “Okay. Well, I have to summarize last week’s meeting for the new campaign. Here,” He hands you three packets of sugar. “These are the last ones in the cupboard.”

“Oh, thanks.” You stare at the packets in your hands before watching him leave. Your lips quirk into a smirk. He still remembers how you had your coffee: half milk with three servings of sugar.

Satisfied with your coffee, you walk back to your cubicle, seeing Jaehyun from his. He takes a sip of his coffee and winces, his reaction making you chuckle to yourself.

It was only when you sat yourself down did you realize he didn’t put sugar in his coffee so you could have yours like how you wanted it.

-

Just like that, your relationship with Jaehyun improved. You had your friendly banters again like before, but you can see him hesitating from time to time, probably because he was still under the impression that you were with Yuta.

Speaking of, Yuta had been elated with the news and demanded to be fake broken up with effective immediately, and like always, you responded with your middle finger.

After another month passes by and both of you were now well acquainted with most of the employees. Somehow, word got around that you were not single so most of the male employees kept their conversations with you at a professional, but friendly manner.

Jaehyun, on the other hand, was constantly flocked with female workers, even from different departments--from different floors. It was entertaining to watch because it reminded you of your school days with him. Watching all these girls fling themselves at Jaehyun when it was obvious he wasn’t interested. But at the same time, you felt bitter because the only reason why he didn’t entertain them back then was because you were entertaining each other.

So what was stopping him now?

-

Everything has been platonic between you and Jaehyun. He’s asked about meeting Yuta, but his schedule never matched any of yours and it just so happened he had to go back to Japan for a his sister’s wedding.

He asked if you were going to the company anniversary party and you said you were because it meant free food and booze.

“You really haven’t changed, [Y/N].” He laughs and you simply shrug your shoulders at him.

He offers to pick you up, but you turn him down. You had to run an errand for Yuta since he wasn’t at his apartment and someone had to feed his pets.

The party was held in a rented out club during Friday night, you were actually quite late because Yuta’s pets were way too playful and you had to clean up the mess they made.

When you finally arrived, almost everyone was drunk and jumping to the music. You wave at Miyoung, who seems sober, unlike her roommates who looked like they were just about pass out but still downed shots. She points behind you and you follow her finger.

Among a group of guys, which you recognized as the IT department, was Jaehyun, boisterously laughing while holding a bottle of beer. Even in the bad lighting, you could tell he was drunk with how dark his ears have become.

You approach the group and it was Jaehyun who greets you first.

“Hey! You made it!” He grins and you uneasily return it.

“Yeah.. are you… okay? Maybe you should stop the drinking?”

One of the IT guys, Jun, laughs, “This guy has some great tolerance with alcohol! He’s pushing himself to the limit.”

This makes you worry. “Hey, Jae, maybe you should stop.”

“Jae? Jae!” He howls, “I haven’t heard that nickname from you since college!”

Another IT guy, Wooseok, cocks his head, “You guys know each other from college?”

You open your mouth to answer, but Jaehyun beats you to it.

“College? Oh no, we go way back. We’ve been friends since we were in diapers. Heck, we were best friends!”

You’ve never seen Jaehyun this drunk before and it was scaring you for some reason.

“Man!” He hollers, “[Y/N] and I went through thick and thin together. She meant the world to me, but guess what? Ha! I had to fuck that up!”

“Jaehyun.” You try to grab his arm but he’s swaying around so much that he slipped through your grasp.

“I fucked our relationship up because I. fucked. her.”

You were frozen in place, ice cold dread flooding your veins. Even the amused smiles of the guys around him started to falter.

“Repeatedly!” He laughs, “And you would think because she just meant so much to me, I would make her my girl, but no! I went out and got myself a girlfriend for some stupid ass reason. And here’s the catch, fellas, [Y/N] and I still got it on behind my girlfriend’s back.”

Jun lets out a low whistle of disapproval.

At this point, you don’t even know how to react. You just stood there, staring at this man that looked like your best friend and had the knowledge of the past, but spoke nothing like him.

“Honestly, I was never even in love with my girlfriend-- my ex-girlfriend. Ah, she knew how to punch, seriously.” Jaehyun absentmindedly rubs his jaw. “I thought I could make things right with you, I-I didn’t know how but before I knew it, I was too late. You got Yuta, of all people, who makes you happy and I know it’s selfish but I pray everyday he would break your heart and have you run to me.”

You suddenly felt angry. Not at him, but at yourself, because what he was saying was true. You and Yuta might not be dating, but if anything happens, you would be running to Jaehyun. You wanted to respond to him. Scream at him. Anything. But you did what you always did best: you turned around and ran away.

-

It was the Saturday noon after the party and you were curled up on the couch, staring at the television.

You haven’t slept properly since you came home last night. You remember crying your eyes out before you can even open the door and stumbling around the house to get your clothes off. You tried to shower it off, the bad memories and the reopened wounds, but you still feel horrible inside.

The television was off. You never turned it on. You just stared at your reflection, the black tint of it all represented your mood. You’ve never felt so alone before.

You finally admit to yourself that you never truly did move on from Jaehyun.

You could have easily replaced him, now that you think of it. There were countless men that had flirted with you, some were decent enough and actually passed your standards, but you never got into a relationship, not even one hook-up since you graduated.

You always thought it was because you were waiting for the one, but now you were beginning to think you were actually waiting for Jaehyun.

You start to tear up again when you can feel your chest ache because you realize Jaehyun broke up with her to choose you even though you told him to choose her. It started to scare you just how deeply in love you are with, but just couldn’t swallow your pride long enough to accept it.

There was a knock on your door and you didn’t think much of it as you wipe your eyes before answering it.

“Please don’t close the door on me.”

You gripped on the doorknob and you swear your knuckles had turned white, nevertheless you stood still and looked at Jaehyun.

He was still in the clothes from the night before and he reeked of the alcohol he had consumed.

“And you don’t have to let me in, I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” He starts off, “I remember everything I said to you last night. I know what I was saying, I just… I just couldn’t stop myself. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” was your instinctive answer but he hushes you.

“No, it’s not okay. I embarrassed you in front of them and I’m fucking up our friendship all over again. God! I’m still so stupid.” He scolds himself, “I’m sorry about wanting Yuta to break your heart. I just… it’s selfish, but I wanted you to know that if he does, I’d be here for you, like… an option.”

You inhaled deeply, nodding your head to show you understood his words.

“I’m also really sorry about… before. I knew how I felt about you and I disregarded it, along with your feelings. I just thought you wanted everything to be physical between us so when I started falling for you, I had to express it elsewhere. That’s where she came in… and I thought maybe I would get serious with her because she’s the perfect description of the type of girl you’d bring home but she’s…” His voice trails off, “She’s not--She’s not you, [Y/N].”

“I don’t know how to respond to what you’re saying.” You quietly admit, casting your eyes downwards to your feet.

“You don’t have to. You can even forget about me telling you, I just had to get it off my chest.” Jaehyun sighs, “Well, I don’t want to hold you up any longer. I probably ruined your day by being here. I’ll get going now.”

You glance up at him when he hasn’t moved after saying he’d go.

“I-I just… I meant what I said before.” He clears his throat. “I’m really am glad that Yuta makes you happy.” He halfheartedly smiles before turning around to leave.

You shut your eyes, feeling a familiar pricking sensation, as your head pounded and chest constrict, “Jae.”

He stops halfway down the hallway and looks over his shoulder.

“Yuta and I…” You shake your head, allowing the tears slip down the corners of your eyes, “We’re not dating. We never were.”

It takes a moment for him to respond, a sad smile on his lips. “I know.”

“W-what? How?”

“I was your best friend, [Y/N]. I know you. I know when you lie.” He fully faces his body towards you, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

A blush manages to find its way across your cheeks, “Then why didn’t you call me out on it?”

“I don’t know. I thought you wanted to show me that you didn’t need me to be happy; that you were fine without me and that you’ve moved on.” He shrugs, chuckling shortly afterwards, “I almost believed it at one point and it hurt, you know, but I guess I deserved that because that’s what I made you go through, right?” He watches you for a bit with a clear frown, “Why are you crying?”

If he hadn’t asked, you wouldn’t have noticed. Your tears had collected on your chin, some dropping to the floor while some continued down your neck. You try to tell him something but sob comes out instead. You crumble to the floor and within seconds, Jaehyun is holding you in his arms and asking you what’s wrong.

“It’s not fair.” You choke out, “It’s been years without any contact, I’ve cried so much because of you. It’s only fair that I keep you out of my life but I just find myself letting you back in.”

“If you want me to leave, then I’ll leave. I’ve hurt you enough.” He whispers into your ear.

“But I,” Your lips quiver, feeling defeated as you finally let go of your pride, “I miss you. Oh god, Jaehyun, I missed you so much.” You bury yourself into his arms, holding onto his shirt with a death grip as if he’d disappear if you held him any looser.

“Shh, I missed you, too. Please stop crying.”

And you honestly did try to calm yourself down, but everything was just so overwhelming. You’ve forgotten what it was like to be hugged by him, how incredibly sweet and comforting he was. When you moved out here for the first time, you felt so alone and all you wanted to do was call him up, but you had to stop yourself every time and end up crying on your bed. When you tried to go out and meet new guys, you’d recoil every time because none of them were your type; none of them were Jaehyun.

-

You jolt awake, gripping the pillow under your head. It was dark in your room and the only light source was the moon outside. Your foggy mind cleared up a bit and you remembered Jaehyun.

Was it all just a dream?

Your eyes felt raw from crying. Pushing yourself up, you sit on the bed, dazed and confused. Have you been asleep all day? Disappointment overcomes you. It had felt real, though. His arms around you, the sweet nothings he whispered to calm you down. But you guess your emotions have gotten the better of you and heavily influenced your dream.

It said it was one AM on your alarm clock and you begrudgingly got off the bed to grab a bottle of water in the kitchen. You don’t open any lights, knowing your way around your apartment anyways. It was small either way, with the kitchen open to the living room. You open the fridge and let its light illuminate the rest of the room, taking out a bottle of water and drinking from it.

You hear what sounded like a snore from behind you, whipping your head to the direction of where it came from. You see an outline of mass on your couch and you move to the side to let the refrigerator light shine on it. Your breath gets caught in your throat when you make out the person on your couch.

You rub your eyes to double check. Closing the fridge, you cautiously walked up to the light switch and turned it on.

Jaehyun’s head was lolled back, mouth agape as he snored. He was always a light sleeper so when the lights turned on, he immediately reacts. His head snaps up first, eyes screwed shut at the sudden brightness of his environment. He groans, rolling his head a bit before peeking with one eye and discovers you staring at him.

“You’re awake.” He shoots up, a knee hitting the coffee table in front of him. “I, uhm, well, you fainted from crying so hard that I tucked you in--!”

It only took a few quick steps for you to reach him and slip your arms around his waist. “Oh god, I thought I was dreaming. You’re here.”

“I, yeah… I didn’t think leaving you after you fainted was a good idea so,” You feel his hand smooth down your back while the other was on your shoulder.

“You stayed.” You pulled away to look up at him. “Thank you.”

He smiles, “You don’t have to thank me.”

The two of you stood like that for a couple of minutes, assessing what just happened and what is bound to happen, but there was hint of satisfaction beneath all that. The hand on your shoulder had moved to touch your cheek, his thumb stroking the skin as gently as he could.

“Why didn���t you sleep beside me?”

“It didn’t feel right. Besides, I went straight here after waking up in Jun’s apartment. My clothes were soiled and I hadn’t bathed.”

You cock a brow, “Is that why you smell like my detergent?”

He flushes, “I threw my clothes in the laundry while I took a shower.”

“So, you’re telling me that while I was passed out, you were parading around my apartment in a towel?”

“No, I didn’t know where your towels were.”

“Oh,” And now your dirty mind was filled with images of what you remembered how his body looked like, “Even better.”

“Stop, don’t even go there.” He lightly reprimands you. When he sees your confused expression, he starts to explain, “If I’m entering your life again, I’m going to treat you right--”

“You already know how to.” You interject, suggestively.

“[Y/N], please. I meant taking you out on proper dates and show you off as my girlfriend.”

It was your turn to blush, “I’d like that.”

He leans down and presses his lips to your forehead, “Then let’s take it slow. Give or take a couple of months.”

You pull away from him, “I am not waiting a couple of months to have sex with you. We can start tomorrow, don’t you like morning sex?”

“Ugh, I do.” He grumbles to himself before clearing his throat, “But no, next month.”

You can’t believe you were actually haggling how long to wait until you guys have sex again. “Next week.”

“[Y/N]! I don’t want to screw this up. I want to properly date you and--”

“You know, I’m not wearing a bra.” You casually interrupt him, his eyes shamelessly dropping to your chest as he stops mid-sentence.

“Yeah, sure, next week sounds good.” He breathes out.

Victoriously, you tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “It’s a deal then. But,” You take his hand, “Can we please cuddle and go to sleep? It’s almost two and I’m not letting you break your back on my couch.”

He laughs, agreeing to your idea and lets you lead him to your room. Once there, he lets go of your hand to remove his pants so he could comfortably sleep in his boxers while you climbed onto the bed. When he finally slips in beside you, he turns you over so your back was pressed against his front.

You quietly greet each other a good night before letting the silence take over.

-

a/n: aaand that’s the end pls don’t ask for more. but also, i had a lot of plots for this last installment lol i’ll be working on another Jaehyun request (smut) and a Doyoung request (fluff) tomorrow so watch out for those.