#he drinks lots of milk but it hurts his stomach really bad

[jackass-jones]

Imagine not liking Ken Amada like wow so cool do you also hate rainbows and candy and baby kittens too? Fucker

[chillinglyadventurous]

Obligation

(Stanley Pines x Fem!Reader?)

I’m not exactly sure what this is. It popped into my head as I was getting ready for work this morning.

Summary: Reader finds out she’s pregnant after Ford gets sucked into the portal. Stan asks her to marry him.

Part 1 > Part 2

Tags: Pregnancy, hurt

You stared at your boyfriend’s brother in absolute horror. You’d been sick for a while. You’d missed your period too. You had just thought it was the stress of watching your boyfriend get sucking into an inter-dimensional portal. You stared blankly at Stanley, now, legally Stanford.

The bad habits you developed to cope with everything hadn’t been helping the nausea. You and Stan had been drinking constantly. You’d been smoking a pack a day since it happened. Now, almost two months later, you realized what was going on.

“Stan,” you sniffled, “I’m pregnant.”

All of the color drained from Stan’s face, “I need to go get some milk,” he murmured, “I’ll be back in a bit.”

Your breath forced itself through your nostrils, “It’s obviously not yours, dummy.”

“Right,” he realized. He sighed in relief, “Really dodged a bullet on that one. No offense.”

Another huff. “What am I supposed to do?” Tears welled in your eyes. How were you going to do this on your own? You wanted a family with Ford, eventually, but not like that. Not when he was gone, “He’s not here. Stan! What am I supposed to do?”

Stan blinked at you, pondering. You had a lot of options, he knew. Then, his face relaxed. He closed the gap between you. His arms wrapped around your shoulders as he pulled you into a tight hug. You were the only family he had now. He couldn’t let you do this alone. He had to do what was right, what he was raised to do. If Ford wasn’t there to do it, he would.

You cried on Stan’s shoulder for a while, trying to come to terms with what was ahead of you. Part of you was excited. You would always have a piece of Ford now. However, the nagging feeling in the back of your mind raged. He wouldn’t get to see your child grow up.

The next morning, you woke to an empty house. In a panic, you searched for Stan, thinking he left you like he had all but threatened when you told him. That was, until he came through the front door with a scared look on his face and a bag in his hand.

“Hey, uh, [Y/N],” he stuttered, “you know, you shouldn’t have to do this on your own.” He pulled a small box out of the bag he was holding. He opened it to reveal a small gold band with a stone on top. It looked like a diamond, but you knew it wasn’t, “You know, if we get married, you’ll technically be married to Ford. Legally, it least.”

You shook your head, “Stan, that’s sweet of you, but you don’t love me.” You placed a hand on his cheek. His eyes were sincere. He was scared, just as scared as you were. This wasn’t how he thought his second marriage would go, “I’ve known you a whole two months. I still love -“

“This isn’t for us,” he insisted. His hand fell to your stomach. “This is for this little thing. It deserves a dad.”

[thesassypadawan]

Christmas Cookies (Leo x WifeReader)

Summary:  After successfully putting down the kiddos for the night, you decide to use this quiet time to get some baking done.  Too bad your cookie loving husband insists on supervising and taste testing.  But he really can’t make a proper judgement call until he gets some milk to go with those Christmas cookies.

Warnings: 18+ (mdni), because there’s sooo much of the smut.  One thirsty big chooch (lactation), lots of yummy cookies, some cheesy holiday music, making a mess on the counter (in your ‘slutty elf’ panties), hints of a dad bod, and… Leo’s big, fat dick.

Notes:  Happy Holidays, lovelies!  Welcome to track one of my special holiday mix, Christmas Cookies! (This wonderful, amazing request came from @gummifrogs! Thank you so much for letting me write this, I had so much fun!) ❤️💚

- “Oi, big chooch!  Get outta there!”  Jokingly you scold, playfully giving Leo a gentle whack on his knuckles.  On his cute bottom with the wooden spoon.  “Save some for the kids…me…the baby!”

- “Can’t help that they’re so good,” he chuckles between bites.  Big, childish grin on his face; frosting tinting his lips and tongue a faint green.  “Plus it’s those sympathy cravings, mio angelo.”  Boldly going for what has to easily be his twelfth cookie of the afternoon.  “Makes me want to gobble them all…oof!  Hey, watch that thing!”

- Expecting another little smack from the confectionary weapon, you catch him off guard instead with a bigger one from your own plump backside.  “Opps, sorry…”  Taunting, shaking it teasingly as you bend to pop another batch into the oven.  “…wide load coming through.”

- Not able to resist a perfect opportunity, he more than happily gets himself a generous handful.  Earning himself a small squeak in response.  “No complaints here.”  While also helping himself to that elusive Santa shaped cutout he had his eye on.  And a second, just to take make it an even baker’s dozen in his slightly soft stomach.  “Except there’s somethin’ missin’ that would make these taste so much better.”

- Knowing your husband all too well and exactly where this was heading towards.  You figure why not, wouldn’t hurt to have a bit of some jolly fun.  “Leo, I swear to all that’s holey.  If you say what I think you’re going to…”

- However your warning isn’t much of a threat, sort of lacks that certain bite necessary.  When you’re pushing up, grinding against…feeling his fat length harden and dig into your lower back.  Getting the next sheet prepared and ready to go…listening to his muffled grunts the entire time.

- Finished with his treat and, most likely, wanting to just cut to the chase.  He places a big hand on your shoulder, the other on your plush hip.  Slowly swaying you both to that familiar holiday tune, humming above you. “What?  I was only gonna say that they go so much better with some…milk.  Think ya could help me with that?”

- There it was…  “Milk, huh?”  Wiping your palms off on the nearby dishrag, nudging the tray off to the side…before you turn in his hold.  “Yeah, I might be able to spare some.”  Arms winding around his thick middle, as you press your engorged chest into him.  The damp, soaked fabric of your ‘borrowed’ shirt sticking to his.  “But you got fifteen thou-”

- “Deal…”  Not letting you finish and certainly not needing any further encouragement, he grabs your squishy globes.  Hoisting you onto the flour and sprinkle covered counter, like you weigh nothing.  “…ya sure it can only be-”

- “Fifteen…”  Reaching, you break a piece off from a recently iced one.  Pressing it to, slipping it past his lips.  “I don’t want the batch burning…don’t need you drinking all of the twins late night feeding.  Got it?”

- “Got it…”  Happily chewing away, he slots his larger frame between your legs.  Caging you in with a strong arm, leaning in close.  Peppering and smothering your cheeks, nose, forehead in loving kisses.  “Ya have my word…”

- “Promise…”  Lightly calloused fingertips smooth over, caress your adorable tummy.  Leaving behind powdery, white smudges and prints as they come to fiddle…tug at your hem.  Before lifting, pulling it off and up over your head.  Letting it drop carelessly to the tiled floor  “Little mama…”

- Warm palm cups and massages a heavy, tender breast.  Wet nipples pebble from the cool, hot air of your tiny kitchen.  Milk leaking, fat droplets trickling…coating Leo’s long digits.  While you coo, mewl softly…while his kisses trail lower and lower.  “Mmmh, heard that about a hundred times.”

- “Don’t know what ya talkin’ about,” Leo replies not so innocently.  Breath washing over, causing goosebumps to rise on your taut skin.  “All I’m hearin’ ya say is…”  Nose bumping, nudging…tongue swirling, lapping at your sore nub.  “…buon appetito.”

- Like a man parched, acting like he hasn’t had a drink in days…he eagerly latches on.  That all too familiar letdown feeling spreading through your bloated tit as he sucks hungrily.  Head titled to the side so sweetly, blissful look on his handsome face.  Your hand cradling, scratching the back lightly with your festive nails.  “Yeah, yeah…”

- It takes just a few pulls from his greedy mouth for that warm, tingling sensation to start growing.  Small gasp escaping you, low groan from him.  The kind that rumbles in his chest, into you…straight to your trembling, fluttering cunny. Rich cream filling, spreading across his tastebuds with each deep draw.  “Buon…”

- Head lulls back, soft pants fall from your lips.  Shivers and sparks of pleasure running rampant, erupting throughout your overly sensitive body.  From his fingers circling your other, neglected bud.  Teasing out a few milky beads that plop onto, roll down the swell of your bump.  “Appetito…”

- Each rhythmic pull and suckle pushes you closer to that orgasmic edge.  Floods your system with all those lovely endorphins.  That cloud and fog your hormone, addled brain.  Causes you to be hot and sticky in more ways than one.  Digits tangling in those short, dark locks…silently coaxing him on, to keep drinking.  “Amore mio…”

- And right as you’re about to reach that blinding apex.  Create a pretty mess on the counter and in those ‘slutty elf’ panties of yours.  Air fills with the timer’s happy beeps.  Your frustrated huffs from being left half full.  The wet pop when he releases your puffy, soggy nipple…

- “That’s it, sugar…out of time,” he mutters.  Gazing up at you with those sparkling blue eyes, mischievous glint sparkling in them.  Clearly enjoying, taking amusement from your flushed face and flustered expression.  “But I got an idea for ya.”

- Licking his lips, his digits clean.  “How about we pop another batch in the oven…”  Slowly, savoring…making sure to get every last drop.  “Get another fifteen for some kissin’ and a huggin’.”

- Shakily grabbing the prepped sheet next to, pushing it into his hands.  You let out an exasperated giggle, returning his naughty look.  “And that’s why you eat Christmas cookies all year long.”

Tag Lists: @espinathena-17, @myheartwillgoon2022, @laylaplease, @kenobiskywalkerkestis, @loverforoldermen, @lunarnightt, @adorbzliz, @ahano, @kenmaiica, @freezerbride95,  @lunarnightt, @jediavengers, @anakinstwinklebunny, @anisangeldust, @xhunnybeeex, @abaker74, @ashleypalm23-blog, @dazednstars141, @roseannekunpmook, @thesmexymenace, @lotte08, @t03soup, @khoatic-with-no-energy, @starsoldier077, @adorbzliz, @dumb-slut-things, @nightwingtheslut, @blackstabbath6, @lisabang3184, @radiantvader, @ahano, @haydenlovers, @sfrassblog, @cjlovesreadingxx, @cutesykuromi, @byunnue, @bigwagonbananabat, @andromachet, @meldelrey-slay, @maryisalittlelambb ,@chrsitine, @theoriginalsinner28, @immakingjokessoidontdrown, @selkie072, @polly-xo, @aniisbae, @jualala, @your-average-fan-girl, @sammonroesslut, @anakinsversion, @jedaweda, @jazzshsworld, @mellowcreationobservation, @angelicodette, @ter-luer, @c0bra-bubbl3s, @lostboys1987girl, @violetiss3lfish, @jarofer, @exeisdeadlol, @deathst9rs,  @cocobear18, @emloveshs, @jennasco, @pumpkinspice166, @fallen--raven, @jewjewbee04, @xx-ttamaraa, @generalgalaxyfury, @harley-kalani

  @hearts4sammonroe, @pitas-star, @sythethecarrot, @naberriess, @steven-grants-world, @valyna27, @elcaballerodragon, @yayyy5678, @anakinsrilgirlfriend, @padme-urlove,  @brattyyybbg

[stars-n-spice]

Bad Batch Food Headcanons:

Was having the meal of champions (soju, galbi, and buldak) and it got me thinking,,

So have this collection of random food headcanons:

Crosshair insists he can handle spicy food but he cannot. He's eating hot cheetos and he's fucking crying

Wrecker had to build up a tolerance for spice - he fucking LOVES spicy food ("It's like an explosion in my mouth!!") but couldn't handle it at first. Now he can handle buldak with half of the spice packet!

Hunter and Tech can handle their spice decently but Echo isn't too fond of spicy foods.

Like Wrecker, Omega built up a tolerance to spice, but also like Crosshair she's sensitive to it and will insist that she can handle her spice

Echo is a picky eater. That's like canon. He doesn't care that he's a grown man, he's ordering mac-n-cheese at the fancy restaurant. Deal with it.

Tech is another picky eater but he thrives off instant stuff like ramen or snacks like chips. Man can plow through a whole Costco-sized bag of tortilla chips in one sitting without realizing it.

Hunter has a stomach of steel, he'll eat anything and everything. It's only a matter of REMEMBERING to fucking eat. He'll stand up, nearly faint, then go, "What the hell?" and it's because he hasn't eaten since fucking yesterday.

No Crosshair, an ice coffee is NOT a suitable breakfast. How many times do we have to tell you? And aren't you fucking lactose intolerant???

Oh they love their dinosaur chicken nuggets though - especially Omega and Wrecker. They'll dunk them in ketchup and create a whole murder crime scene.

Omega LOVES soup. Any and all kinds! I think she'd really enjoy udon or 냉면 the most though. The slurp-ier the better!

I feel like Tech is a curry enjoyer. Indian curry, Thai curry, Japanese curry - he loves it all.

Rip Crosshair you would've loved flavored soju 😔

Rip Wrecker you would've loved Korean BBQ and all you can eat sushi

I don't think Hunter likes cold foods. His teeth are sensitive and they hurt when he eats cold stuff like ice cream (no I'm not projecting)

Crosshair likes mint ice cream. Echo likes rocky road. Wrecker enjoys strawberry or sherbert. Omega likes cookie dough. Tech likes caramel or coffee.

Ice cream is like the only kind of "dessert" that Crosshair likes (despite being lactose intolerant) - he doesn't really have a sweet tooth

WAIT CROSSHAIR WHEN I TELL YOU ABOUT BINGSU!!!

SPAM. SPAM. SPAM. Shut up they WOULD eat spam and idc what people say I fucking LOVE spam. Spam is the love of my life, they could never make me hate spam. I used to write parody love songs about spam as a kid. They would enjoy breakfasts of spam, rice, and eggs.

They'd devour the shit out of Mexican food. Like CMON-

Feel like Omega would like fiedo. And Echo too

Wrecker thinks breakfast burritos are godsend - he absolutely loves papas and chorizo

Y'know what would be funny? Echo being a picky eater yet LOVEING Mole. It's not for everyone (I personally like it) but he thinks it's good

Omega has a boba addiction. She has ro have it every week. Her favorites are Taro, Strawberry Matcha, and Honey Milk Tea

Only Hunter and Wrecker like boba; Echo, Crosshair, and Tech find the texture funny but they enjoy the drinks

I feel like Echo is a big bread eater. My sister reminds me a LOT of Echo and she absolutely ADORES bread (she's also a picky eater) - catch him at 85° or Paris Baguette

Hunter would love Soul Food and he also can work a grill

Rip Echo you would’ve loved soba and you would've loved 맥주

Tech actually secretly (not so secretly) has a sweet tooth - he really likes muffins and pies specifically

Omega and Wrecker record "Food Review" videos together

I have,, so many more ideas and whatnot but I'm leaving it here-

Ugh I just,,, I have so many foods I'd love to introduce them too-

[bluesest]

Do a story about a police offier and a military man who are rivals having a shit holding contest

A Police Station

You might think that in a police office dealing with serious matters such as fugitive investigations, the cops working there must also be serious, but you would be surprised that many of them kill boredom in peculiar ways: Bruce was part of these cops, in fact, he was a military man who constantly worked there, he was a man in his 30's with remarkable muscles thanks to his training at the academy, he was in charge of filling out the data of the different criminals that were captured in the area so they could be processed and sent to jail. He did this job with his partner Dan. Dan was a man in his 30's relaxed and always joking, he trained at the same police academy as Bruce and they always got along badly as both were excellent at the academy and now on the job, they were definitely rivals. They competed in everything: on patrol, at the check-in, and even created their own competitions such as running, lifting, among others. But this time the competition went to a new level. During their coffee break, the two were arguing: Dan: "Don't think you're better than me just because you finished the report earlier…" Bruce: "Please… that shows how efficient I am, and the more efficient a person is, the better they do at work!" Dan: "Really? You're not even a cop!" Bruce: "That's true… I'm somewhat superior to that…" Dan: "If you're a military guy, then why are you working with cops and not other military guys?

Bruce: "Shut the fuck up… *BRRRRRRR* once��." Dan: "What's wrong with you Bruce, did the coffee hurt your weak stomach?" Bruce: "Of course it *PPPFFFFFFTTT* didn't…" Dan: "HA! Did a single cup of coffee really give off such a terrible smell? My stomach is able to handle coffee and much more, it's even better than your weak diarrhea stomach." Bruce: "right… and that time you drank a glass of milk, don't you remember that?" Dan: "THAT MILK WAS BAD!" Bruce: "yeah right…" Dan: "I bet I can hold out longer than you!" Bruce: "Okay… we'll each have to drink what hurts our stomachs, me a cup of hot coffee and you a glass of milk." Dan: "And with Laxatives too! To add more difficulty to the challenge, ready?" Bruce: "Ready." Both taking advantage of their break they left the station and walked to the nearest pharmacy where they bought fast acting laxative powder and together they returned to the station to mix it together with the coffee and milk. Bruce: Are you ready? Dan: Ready to humiliate you? Sure! They both in one sip drank their respective drinks, due to the laxative they tasted bitter, but at least the taste is a seal of quality that the laxative works too well.

Suddenly the boss arrives, a man in his 50's with gray hair, fat and shaggy, and although he is old, the man demonstrates an aura of superiority that instills fear of his inferiors or in general anyone near him. The boss was carrying a cup of hot bitter coffee and saw our protagonists "lounging around." Boss: "What are you two doing here, your coffee hour is over!" Dan: "We're sorry sir, we'll return to our post right away". Chief: "Of course not! Lawkeepers must have discipline, as punishment you must organize the warehouse record boxes at this time!" Bruce: "but…" Chief: "NOW!" With their heads bowed, they both went towards the farthest and darkest room in the station, the warehouse, as they entered through the door a large cloud of dust embraced them as they tried to find the room's light switch. When they turned on the light they saw that they had a lot of work to do and so they got down to work: Bruce organized the titles of the boxes in alphabetical order while Dan cleaned the dust from the place. Bruce: "This is all your fault Dan." Dan: "My fault? If you're the one who wanted to have the receipt when we bought the laxative, we took forever because of you." Bruce: "Technically you're the one who came up with the contest idea" Dan: "don't complain, it's done, how's your tummy doing my little baby". Bruce: "I'm fine and besides I'm not a baby".

Dan: "Sure? Why do I think you'll need a diaper soon?" Bruce: "In this station there are 6 cubicles in the only bathroom, there are only two of us so I don't think anyone here needs a diaper, clown." Dan: "What did you say?" At that moment, Dan threw the broom he was using at that instant at Bruce. Bruce: "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU! uggghhhh!" Suddenly Bruce grabs his stomach with both hands and starts sweating. Dan: "really, you're a military guy and it hurt something like that? I didn't even pull it hard!" Bruce: "Shut up…" Dan: "Wait, I know what's going on, anger upset your stomach, right?" Bruce: "I said *BURP* you shut up…" Dan: "HAHAHA this challenge is going to be a lot easier than I thought." Bruce still in pain came at Dan and pushed him causing him to fall. Dan: "Hey! BRRRRR oh… *PFFFFFFFTFTTTTTTTTTTTTTT*" Bruce laughed at this situation while Dan was lying on the ground in embarrassment, but Bruce laughed some more, causing a terrible gas to come out of him *PPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTT*. Dan: "aghhh it reeks of the typical coffee smell you emanate every day". Bruce: "This is he who rotted our office the day he drank that milk… ugghhhhhh" The tension was growing in the huge warehouse, everyone doing their job, but little by little the effects of the laxative appeared driving our guys crazy. The warehouse being enclosed without any ventilation caused the heat and odors to build up in the air combining them for a toxic cloud that would disgust anyone who smelled it.

Both couldn't stand the smell and the heat, however, admitting it would be a statement of defeat as they couldn't stand the very odors their bodies produced: a mixture of sweat, carbon dioxide and of course the methane produced by their huge, sweaty bubble butts in the tight uniform. Both boys gave up on at least showing their discomfort in the temperature of the place. Bruce: "Wow, I can't stand the BRRRRR heat in here." Dan: "You're telling me, there should be some kind of fan or window around here." Dan starts scanning the place: "Wow this warehouse stinks horrible, and I'm not even in the place we're working… Damn, are there really not even windows in this place? Ha! I guess I know what it's like to be an intern here *BBRRRRRR* oh shit… *BBRRRRRRRR* I should look to see if there are any bathrooms in this warehouse… I don't plan on losing or cheating, just BBRRRRRRRRRRRR agghhh, just…. I'm getting ready for when Bruce gives up so I can show him where the loser's throne is… HAHAHAHAHAH *BBRRRRRRRRRR* there's no… *PPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT* no no no no no *PPPFFFFTTTTTTT* hang in there, hang in there! *PPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT*… it almost all came out, I hope Bruce gives up soon or I'll have more things to clean up in this warehouse." Meanwhile Bruce tries to concentrate on locating the boxes full of reports and records properly, but gradually his vision becomes blurry and he begins to feel slight dizziness and a swelling in his stomach. Bruce gasps in exhaustion and pain.

Bruce gasps tired and sore, but he must prove that he is the best: "I must keep calm, *BURP* I just need more time, wait a minute, what if Dan ran away and went to use the bathroom, I CAN'T ALLOW IT!" Bruce wearily walks slowly to find Dan, after 5 minutes he finally finds him poking around in the old appliances in the storage room: Bruce: "HEY!" Dan: "AAHHHHHHHHHHHHH *PPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT*… man enough with that scaring people…" Bruce: "ufffff you're really deflating aren't you, anyway, I came to make sure you didn't cheat trying to get out of the warehouse and find a toilet." Dan: "me cheating? don't you know me or does your mind make you think those things because you're desperate?" Bruce: "of course *PPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT* no…" Dan: "Yuck!" A sound invades the place, it was the creaking door of the warehouse where a young intern is seen entering unannounced. Intern: "ho-hello, the boss asked me to clean the warehouse and… uggghhhh what stinks? No wonder this place needs to be cleaned." Bruce: "Well…" Dan: "You finally got here! We've been waiting for you, on the right is the dust broom." Bruce: "And… you should also organize all these boxes of records in alphabetical order…" Intern: "Okay…" Dan: "Thank you very much boy for choosing to spend your internship here, we will be back soon to see your progress my little cadet." They both fled the place and were saved from working in such high temperatures for a whole day, Bruce was angry because surely the boss sent the intern for Dan and him to help him, but he was left to his fate with a toxic gas in the air, but also, Bruce was grateful to Dan for getting him out of that warehouse hell, now he just had to resist the hell in his stomach until Dan can't take it anymore. An alarming stomach growl invaded Dan's body, suddenly: *PPPFFFFFFFFFTFTTTT* "(oh no, I think here it comes, aghhhhhh I feel like my anus is on fire) … hey Bruce, it really was an oven in the warehouse, I want to cool my face in the…. bathrooms." Bruce: "You really want me to believe that? *BRRRRRR* aghhhh *PPFFFFFFTTT* (I think… I shit my pants, that fart came with surprise) … ok I'm burning up too, come on already BRRRRRR…" They both slyly start walking fast, then run straight to the station bathroom and ran into the surprise of: Dan: "Fuck! There's a long line for the bathroom… Which has six cubicles!" Bruce: "Of course I should have guessed… it's three o'clock, it's the middle of the day, usually that's when most of our fellows get the urge to go pee, or also… well, suffer the effects of coffee…"

Dan: "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! … from this heat I'm having… there's only one bathroom in this office besides this one!" Bruce: "You're not talking about…" Dan: "You know what I'm talking about." Bruce: "The boss's bathroom… are you crazy?" Dan: "Of course I'm not, at this hour the boss usually frequents a restaurant, so his office is empty, there's only one chance, and only one toilet, I'll get there first." Bruce: "Toilet?" Dan: "I DID NOT SAY THAT!" Bruce: "HA! Do you really want to give up? Ughhhhhhh *PPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTT* *PPRRRRRRR*" Dan: "Don't tell me what…" Bruce: "Fuck you." Then Bruce started running while his wet farts were coming out of his body at an alarming speed, Dan was stunned to learn that his military friend shit his pants, but there was no time, he had to get there first before Bruce. Dan started to run losing control of his bowels: Bruce was approaching the office until suddenly one of his coworkers arrived: Coworker: "Hey Bruce, I heard the boss put you and Dan to work in the warehouse, so I was wondering if you could carry this box there for me?" Bruce: "I…" Suddenly Dan ran past him: Coworker: "That was Dan, why was he running, and why did it start stinking up the place?

Bruce: "Listen I don't have time, it's just…you know…I have to report and…bye." Bruce ran as fast as he could until he could see in the distance how Dan was trying to force the door of the boss's office: Dan: "Fuck, if I apply too much force I'll not only break the door, I'll break my anus too!" Bruce: "GET OUT OF THE WAY!" And with force Bruce broke the door with his forearm, a technique they both learned from the academy, because of that push Bruce fell to the office floor while Dan tried to run, but his legs almost didn't respond to avoid making a mess. Weakened Bruce started to get up and grabbed Dan's elbow: Dan: "Let me use the bathroom first, I'm just going to freshen up, after that you can shit all you want." Bruce: "I don't want to take a shit, I just can't stand the heat, I'll use it first and let you relax your bowels afterwards." Dan: "NO SHIT!" They both started fighting and pushing each other until a misstep caused bruce to back up and clutch his stomach with all his might as the wet gas made its way through his rectum to the outside.

This was taken advantage of by Dan who in desperation began to quickly unbutton his blue pants and began to undress in front of his partner even before he reached the bathroom. His body from the hip down was naked, his sweaty cock and ass were in the air getting oxygen and a break from the tight clothing.

While Bruce looked on in confusion, Dan sat on the toilet without closing the door and finally their struggle ended: *PPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT* *PPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *QSHQSHQSHQHSSQHQHQSS*. Dan started with a fart and then the pressure was released with a torrent of brown diarrhea, the smell wafted out of the small room and came to flood the entire office: *PPFFFTTT* *QHSHQSHQSHQSHQSHQSHQSHQSHSHSHSHSQHSQSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *PRPRPRPRPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *GASP* *BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSP* The look of pain and satisfaction on Dan's face said it all, apparently he waited for this moment all day in silent agony, his face was red and sweaty. *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* "Aggghhhhhhh my god, finally…" In a lull, Dan turned to look at Bruce who was dumbfounded, so much so that his urge to explode the toilet disappeared as well:

Bruce: "Of course not! *FLIPS* that means… I WON!"

Dan: "Fuck you… *BRRRR* *PRPRPRPRPRPRPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSQSQSQSQSQSSHSQHHHHHHHHHHHSSS* AGGHHH" Bruce turned and saw Dan's boxer briefs stained with a deep brown liquid which reminded him that: *PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT* *BRRRRRRRRRRR*. Bruce: "Well, since I won, I'm going to the bathroom right now." Dan: "which bathroom, genius?" Bruce realized what was going on, he won, but at what cost, desperate he asked Dan where he could "break free". Dan with a smirk said, "well, I don't see any trash cans around here, so how about that coffee pot, the boss's favorite."

Bruce: "Of course I'm not going there asshole." Dan: "Well, there are only two other options: either you can shit in your precious green uniform and go home shitting, or you can also shit in the dumpsters in the hallways with an audience obviously!"

Bruce was about to angrily yell at his partner until another cringe made him panic and he did something he would regret all his life: Just like Dan, Bruce started stripping in front of him, freeing his totally sweaty round bubble butt with brown diarrhea stains and desperately put the boss's coffee pot on the floor and sat on it using it as a toilet: *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *PPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTT* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* Dan: "Wow, I didn't think you were capable…" Bruce: "Shut up."

*PPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT* *PPPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *SQHSHQSHQSHQHSHQSHQSHSQSHSQHSHSHSSSSSSS* *PPFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTT* *BRRRRRRR*.

The smell was putrid, it combined in the air along with the smell emanating from Bruce, they both had a big stomach ache from holding it in for so long. The coffee pot was already half full of a coffee-like liquid, but in taste and smell it was the worst thing in the world, a strange mixture of yesterday's dinner and Bruce's breakfast today.

It should be mentioned that the coffee pot was not wide enough to hide and retain the military man's big ass and penis.

Dan: "you really outdid yourself with this one." Bruce: "ohhhhhhhhhhhhh"

Dan: "But if you think you can outdo me, dude I'm telling you no: *PSPSPSPPSSPPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPS* *PFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT* *PFFFFFFFTTTTT* *PLOP* *PPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRP*" Bruce: "…another competition?" Dan: "We always do weird competitions, a battleshit would be the weirdest of all, more so than this one…" Bruce: "I don't feel like thinking about anything right now… AAAHHHHHHHHHH *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *PFFFFFFFTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTF* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *SQSHQSHQSHQHSHQSHSQSQSQSHSHHHHHHHHH* AGGHHHHH" Dan: "You say you don't want to compete, but that was intentional, wasn't it?" Bruce: "You know coffee makes me sick, obviously it wasn't intentional…oohhhh *BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*"

Dan: "That roar says something else." Bruce: What does it say?Dan: "It says he's setting up heavyweights, and I've already got the guns ready PSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSP SHQSHQSHQSHHQSHHQSHQSHSQHQSHQSHQSHS BRRRRRRRRRR PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSP"

Bruce: "that was…" Dan: "Unbelievable? I know." Bruce: "Nope, disappointing, look at this… or, rather, smell and listen to this: *PPPFFFFFFFFFFFFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFTF* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *PFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT* *PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT* *PRRRRRRRPPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *SQHSHSHSHSHQHQSHQSHQSHSHS* HA HA HA HA… OHHHH *PLOP* *PFFFTTT* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR*" Dan: "Like this? You haven't seen anything: *PFFTT* *PSPPPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSPSSPSSPSS* *QSHQSHQSHQSHQSHHQSHQSHQSHQSHQHSQHS* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *BRBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *BRBRBRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *PFFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFPSSSSSSSSSSSSPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRPRP* *BRRRRRRRRRR* *PSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH* *SHHQSHSHQSHQSHHSQHSQHQSHQSHQSHQSHS* *PLOP*"

Bruce: "Well….GET READY!: *PFFFTTT* *PRPRPSSSSSSSS*

"Dan: "Apparently you ran out of ammo Bruce."

Bruce: "HAHAHAHAHAH okay, you won at… Who shits the most?"

Dan: "I'll wear that title with honor *PLOP* partner."

Both partners laughed and after 10 minutes fled the crime room without first cleaning the bathroom and throwing the boss's coffee pot in the trash, praying the smell wouldn't clog the office.

[natalias-wife]

My solace | n.r

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x reader

Summary: Just some fluff with the love of our lives

Warnings: slight angst? I think. Kinda rushed.

Word count: 2k

Author’s note: So this is really short and has a lot of things that can be improved, but honestly for my first fic it’s not that bad. Feel free to give me some tips if you see any errors or something.

You sighed as you looked at your alarm clock only for it to read 2am. When your stomach started growling you stood up with a groan and left your room to go to the kitchen for a snack. Looking around the cupboards and the fridge you decided to eat some of the cookies Wanda baked a few days ago and a glass of chocolate milk for a drink.

“Couldn’t sleep?” You jumped slightly at the voice which she chuckled at and you looked at her. “Mhm guessing neither could you?” You smiled shyly at her and she smiled softly back with a small nod. She sat down next to you on the kitchen aisle.

“The cookies any good? The guys keep stealing them before I even have a chance to eat one” you both chuckled softly at that and you gave her one of the cookies. You both sat in a comfortable silence for a while until you broke the silence. “Nat?” She hummed in acknowledgment. “Do you ever get scared before missions?” You were fidgeting with your fingers and when she looked at you her gaze softened. “Of course I do. I’m pretty sure everyone does. Why? Are you scared of the new mission Fury just put you on?” She grabbed your hand to stop you from fidgeting and with her other hand she lifted your chin up so that you would look at her. “I mean yea it’s my first solo mission and I’m scared I’ll fuck something up. I don’t wanna accidentally hurt anyone...” She frowned at that. “Look y/n, i know it’s scary trust me I do. I still get scared of the fact I’ll hurt innocents. But you can’t let that fear control you if you can do it with duo missions you can also do it on a solo one. And I’ve seen you fight, you’re good agent y/l/n!” She pulled you into a hug which caught you off guard for a bit, but you quickly hugged her back.

//

Natasha fluttered her eyes open and stood up to go for her morning run with Steve. She saw Steve waiting for her by the kitchen with 2 water bottles and some energy snacks. “Sam’s waiting for us at the park he wanted to get some warmups in.” Natasha raised her eyebrows. “Still so eager on outrunning us?” Steve chuckled at that. “Unfortunately.” They both started walking to the park together and met up with Sam.

After their run they went to shower and change into training gear. After they were done changing they all met up at the training room with the rest of the avengers. “Okay so today we’re going to be focusing on hand to hand combat. Sam you’re with me, Tony with Rhodey, Wanda you’re with vision and y/n you’re with Nat. Alright into positions!” Everyone walked up to their partner and got into their fighting positions. “Move your legs a little closer to each other.” You did as she said and asked her if this was better. “Wait let me.” She walked up behind you and moved your legs into a better and more comfortable position. “Thanks.” Getting back into her position as well you started sparring. Obviously Nat went easy on you since she’s way better at hand to hand combat. After a while of just blocking and attacking she threw you over her shoulder onto the mat. “Okay that hurt” you said while groaning in pain. She smiled at you and helped you up. “Take five?” You agreed and went to sit on one of the benches while drinking some water. Nat sat next to you and Wanda joined as well. The three of you got engaged into light conversation about training and you also started teasing the boys a bit.

After training you bid your goodbyes to the rest and went up to Fury’s office for your upcoming mission. Walking into his office you greeted the man and Maria who was there as well. After going through the steps and all the information he informed you that your jet would be leaving in an hour and a half.

You started packing all your gear and some extra stuff for if the mission had to be expanded. After that you went to the main floor to bid farewell to the other avengers. Everyone have you a hug and a quick be safe then they went back to whatever they were doing before. Lastly you walked up to Nat and Wanda and Wanda immediately pulled you into a tight hug. “Be safe okay? I know you’re stubborn, but please just follow the instructions they gave you.” You smiled at her and nodded. “Swear?” You held your hand up while holding your other hand in the air “I swear.” You teased and she chuckled then said bye once more and went back to baking with Vision. Then Nat pulled you into a hug and gave you a kiss on the top of your head. “Promise me you’ll be careful.” You promised her and kept hugging her, until Maria told you it was time to go. You both said your goodbye’s to each other and you stepped into the jet.

//

Walking into the building which contains the information you need you hold your gun ready and check every corner of the room then move on to the next one. Shooting the few guards in your way you went room by room. When you finally saw the laptop with the files you needed you did one last check around the room and then walked up to it and put the usb in it. While the data was being transferred the doors busted open. ‘Shit’ you quickly took cover behind one of the desks when they started shooting. Trying to look at how many agents there were you peeked above the desk but quickly ducked back down when a bullet barely flew over your head.

Taking a deep breath and closing your eyes you readied yourself to use your powers knowing you weren’t going to get out of this without. Your hands burst into flames and you started throwing fire blasts at the agents. You managed to knock a fair amount of them back and started going into hand to hand combat with a few others until you were in the clear. When you looked back and saw that the transfer was finished you quickly grabbed the usb and went to get out of there. When you were out of the building you were surrounded by even more hydra agents. You groaned and put your hands up in surrender and got on your knees. Just as one of the agents walked up to you to cuff you S.H.I.E.L.D finally showed up and shot the agents surrounding you.

You got up and started walking to the jet when another S.H.I.E.L.D agent shouted out a warning. Turning around you readied your gun but dropped it when you felt a pressure against your stomach just as one of your agents shot the hydra agent. Looking down you immediately pressed your hands against the wound to stop the blood from spilling out. You quickly walked further inside the jet and sat down while breathing heavily. The agents around you were grabbing medical stuff for you but you could barely focus as your sight started to get blurry. You could hear someone telling you to keep your eyes open and just then everything went dark.

//

It felt like the whole world stopped moving when Natasha got the news. She was distant ever since it happened and mostly kept herself in her room. Clint and Wanda brought her food and kept pressuring her to get some sleep but it was no use. She couldn’t sleep not knowing if you were going to be okay or not. Even though Cho already told them you were going to be alright. The bullet didn’t hit any critical organs but you still lost a fair amount of blood. You awoke this morning and Cho told you what happened while making you drink some water for your dried up throat. You asked her if you could see Wanda and Nat and she agreed. She asked Friday to inform the woman of the fact that you’re conscious and ask them to come up to see you. It wasn’t long before the doors opened and both woman came barging in. You frowned at the sight of them since Wanda’s eyes looked red and puffy while Nat’s were wet with tears and you could see the bags under her eyes. You opened your arms for both woman to hug you and they did so carefully not to hurt you. After reassuring them that you’re feeling okay and it only hurts a little Wanda left the room to grab some food for you.

“You promised..” you winced at the crack in her voice and sat up straight ignoring the protests from the redhead. You grabbed her face in your hands and started wiping her tears with

your thumbs. “I’m sorry Nat.” You softly said to her. She looked you into the eyes and you both sat there in silence for a little while.

“Can I kiss you?” The question caught you off guard. I mean you’ve been hopelessly in love with this woman ever since you joined the team but never would you have thought she felt the same way. You were both just really oblivious to the others feelings.

“Please.” You let out in a quiet voice but thankfully she heard you and pulled your lips into hers. The kiss was slow and passionate and you both sighed dreamily into it. She tasted so much sweeter than you thought. When the kiss broke apart so that you could both catch your breath she put her forehead against yours.

“I wish we did that earlier.” You said while intertwining your hands with hers. “Me too.” She kissed your hands and made you look up at her.

“So I know this is cheesy and I feel like a high school girl asking you this but do you want to make this official and be my girlfriend?” You nodded frantically and she pulled you in for another kiss. Only pulling away when the rest of the team showed up and Clint cleared his throat with a teasing smirk on his face.

When Cho cleared you from the med-bay you asked Nat if you could sleep with her that night and she agreed. So now here you were laying together in her bed while looking at each other lovingly. You gave each other a goodnight kiss and you asked her to hold you.

“Is this okay? Tell me when I hurt you yeah?” You smiled at her reassuringly “Nat you could never hurt me. And yea this is perfect.”

You both fell asleep with smiles on your faces that night feeling safe in each others arms.

[sickiesope]

Hi again lol

Sorry here's another request😅

Could you please do a fic with sick Jungkook and him displaying the symptoms of lactose intolerance whenever he drinks his banana milk or eats something like cereal or anything dairy related, it really screws up his stomach and makes him feel and be sick but the others don't know what's going on and when his stomach ache gets really bad one of the members decide they should take him to the doctors?

I'm really in the mood for bts emeto fics today idk why sorry haha 🤷🏾��♀️

Hiiiii thank you for this wonderful request it's so cute! :) I'm soo sorry it took so long, lately I've been lagging with motivation/creativity.. buut I loved writing this fic very much and have more stories coming soon! I hope you enjoy :) 💜

Banana milk disaster

Sickie: Jungkook

Caretakers: Jimin and Yoongi

TW: emeto

Jungkook really loves his banana milk. He enjoys a nice glass of it with his meals. Usually he's okay after one, but more than that can make him feel a bit sick. If he has a lot of dairy in one setting it can really upset his stomach.

Jungkook had cereal for breakfast, he likes to switch it up sometimes. He doesn't think much of it when he has milk with it. And of course he has banana milk on the side.

As Jungkook goes about his morning schedule, he feels a slight discomfort in his tummy that comes and goes. The milk he had is moving around a little more and his stomach gurgles. JK pauses for a second but then decides it's not a big deal. He keeps going on, believing it will soon pass.

A few hours later and it's lunch time. He was right about it passing, he feels better for the most part. Jungkook has pizza for lunch. The pizza had more cheese on it than expected but he loved it anyway and ate three slices. And he had two cups of banana milk to wash it down. He sits back in his chair as the food sits, feeling pretty full. He looks at the clock, it's already almost 1:00. The group has a short meeting about new music coming soon. He almost lost track of time and running late.

JK gets up quickly and the sudden movement makes his stomach rumble in complaint. It hurts a little more but he did eat quite a bit. Jungkook sees the other members walking down the hall and he lightly jogs to catch up to them. The quick movements hurt his stomach and make it cramp up. He slows down and winces, holding his middle.

Yoongi notices the younger "Kook, are you good?"

Jungkook quickly answers "yeah, I'm fine hyung. Just ate a little too much I think."

Yoongi takes the answer but looks at JK's expression. He seems a bit off but assumes he's just having some indigestion. Jungkook can't stand up anymore and quickly takes the first chair he sees. He tries to sit up straight but his stomach pains are making it difficult. He's trying to appear normal. Hopefully the meeting won't drag on too long.

As he sits there and listens to Hoseok and Namjoon speak, Jungkook realizes he made a big mistake. His meals aren't agreeing with him and he's starting to feel nauseas as well as pain. He had too much milk and that cheese pizza didn't help. His stomach is churning and struggling to break down everything. It feels heavy and uncomfortable. Jungkook touches his abdomen and realizes he's bloated. He rubs it discreetly.

As the meeting goes on, Jungkook feels increasingly sick. His stomach walls contract harder trying to digest but making little progress. The cheese is just a warm gooey lump bubbling up and the milk sloshes around rapidly, clashing with the gastric juices of his stomach. He can feel pressure building up inside and it hurts. Jungkook shifts in his chair, trying to hide his discomfort. His tummy does little squelches as it fights with his lunch. He hopes Jimin sitting beside him doesn't hear anything. He also hopes no one notices his fidgeting every few minutes.

Jungkook's stomach grumbles in a way that isn't healthy digestion. He quickly presses his hand over, trying to muffle the sounds. It doesn't work as Jimin looks and mouths to him "you okay?" Jungkook nods quickly, he's really flustered now.

Jungkook tries not draw any more attention to himself. "So we'll be recording again next week.." he hears Namjoon say. JK tries to concentrate but he can't. His stomach churns and twists with the milk bubbling and splashing around, it feels like a storm brewing inside. It hurts and makes him feel queasy.

"Ughhhhh.." JK groans, clutching his stomach. He can't take it anymore.

"Kook, is everything alright?" Yoongi asks.

"Huh?" Jungkook realizes they stopped the meeting and everyone is looking at him.

"Yeah, you've been acting weird this whole time" Hoseok says. He isn't upset, just worried.

"Is your tummy okay?" Jimin asks him.

Jungkook races to reach the bathroom. He starts jogging again, making his stomach hate him even more. Time feels like it's going slower and he worries he won't make it. The cramps get worse and every step he takes is a jab of pain.

Jungkook shakes his head and sighs. His stomach burbles and he feels the pressure escalate tenfold. Milk rises up and splashes against his throat and his eyes widen. He could taste it again and that makes it even worse. He half swallows then gags, he's going to throw up right now. Jungkook gets up and rushes out with a hand over his mouth. Everyone else looks at each other, confused.

Jungkook just makes the bathroom stall but doesn't have time to lock the door. The cramps are so bad he falls to his knees. He crawls and hovers over the porcelain bowl with shaky arms, breathing heavily. He gags and his stomach erupts with a tidal wave of milk pouring out. JK gasps and retches back to back, vigorously spewing out more with barely time to breathe. He's throwing up so hard that milk is pouring out of both his mouth and nostrils. It feels and smells so disgusting he can't stand it. "Oh my god.." he mutters. This has to be the grossest thing he's done. It tastes even worse coming back up and the smell is stuck in his nose. It makes him even more nauseated and sets his stomach off again, projectile vomiting into the bowl. It's a murky yellow color with random pieces. The cheese floats in little undigested chunks and curds, the whole thing looks so repulsive that he barfs again and more slimy chunks slip out. It feels awful and sickening, he just wants it to stop. Jungkook is surprised at how much he threw up and it still doesn't feel like he's finished.

"Jungkook??" A voice that sounds like Jimin's comes through "are you alright??"

Jungkook answers with another retch and coughs. "Ughh, hyung..I'm here" he chokes out.

Jimin rushes to the open stall and finds Jungkook slumped sitting on his knees in front of the toilet. He has an anguished look on his face and clutching his middle.

"Awwh, what happened Kookie??" The older asks worriedly.

Jungkook looks up with teary eyes "I think I had -- *cough* -- too much dairy today.." he says hoarsely. Another painful churn makes him gag and he quickly turns back to be sick again. More vomit forcefully ejects from his stomach and Jimin can see how hard he's visibly heaving. He grimaces at the sight in the toilet.

"Ugh, why did I have so much" Jungkook whines with remorse. He burps and spits up another small moutful and finally backs away.

Jimin holds him in a comforting embrace and rubs his back, not caring where they are. He also doesn't mind Jungkook's messy face burrowing into his sweater. He just feels terrible for the poor younger. "Are you done?" he asks softly.

"Mhm, I think so.." Jungkook mumbles, still holding his middle. He doesn't want to look at the mess half filling the toilet. He uses toilet paper to wipe his mouth and blow his nose.

Jimin flushes it for him and helps him get up. "Easy Kookie, take your time." He helps him clean up and Jungkook holds Jimin's hand as they walk out. The others are standing outside the bathroom with worried looks.

"Jungkook what's wrong? You sounded terrible in there" Yoongi prods. He knew something was wrong.

"How long have you been sick?" Jin asks, looking at his flushed face.

"Lunch just wasn't agreeing me, that's all hyungs. I think I got it all out now." JK replies, still a bit hoarse.

"Are you sure?? You were throwing up a lot in there." Jimin frets.

"Yeah I'm fine, I just want to go home" Jungkook sniffles. He can still kind of smell it in his nose and he hates it.

As they head toward the exit of the building, Jungkook feels his stomach roiling again, about to throw out more. He gulps and speeds up, trying to ignore the cramps. Jungkook pushes the door open and scrambles outside. He bends over heaving and his stomach shoots out more yellow vomit, splattering all over the sidewalk. JK continues to bring up liquid and chunks and he can see traces of the cereal he had for breakfast now too. His body really wants get rid of everything.

His hyungs are concerned at the amount he's throwing up, it doesn't look natural. "Kook, I think you should see the doctor" Yoongi tells him.

"Noo, I'll be fine--" Jungkook cuts off and gags, puking up another sloppy wave on the concrete adding to the growing puddle. He's mostly bringing up liquids now. He keeps thinking he's finally empty but then his stomach always surprises him.

"Look at this, you're clearly not well!" Taehyung gestures to the giant puddle on the ground and Jungkook still bent over, he can't stand straight. Jungkook spits out a few more bits and it finally fades off. His stomach is really screwed up and his throat hurts from the efforts. JK lets his hyungs take him to the doctor.

-----------------

Jungkook sits in the doctor's office with Yoongi and Jimin, he still feels sick. The doctor asks him questions about his stomach pain, how much he threw up, his eating habits and what he had today. He checks his abdomen, feeling how hard and bloated it is. Jungkook winces and groans as everything hurts.

"Hm, your stomach does not like too much dairy in a short period of time. In the future you'll have to be more careful."

Jungkook looks down and sighs "I'm sorry stomach.." he pats it gently. His stomach growls loudly in response, scolding him. "Yeah, you're still mad at me huh."

Jungkook nods, he feels foolish for not thinking of the consequences earlier. The doctor informs him on medications he can take to help with digesting lactose. Jungkook won't be giving up his banana milk anytime soon, just not so much dairy at once.

Yoongi and Jimin help him get up and they buy the medication. Jungkook decides to hold off on the banana milk for a few days but he knows he's likely going to retract that statement tomorrow.

[dctrreids]

well now you have to talk about reid + ice cream.

------it's a simple but torrid love affair with the good doctor.

unfortunately he's lactose intolerant, however from a very young age he's held a great affection for dairy products. ice cream is the champion above all, but he's partial to cheap cheese products as well ( string cheese, babybel ). he also likes cereal, though his tastes in that flip violently between the responsible adult choices or the fun choices. you're just as likely to find a high fiber cereal in his cupboard than you are cocoa pebbles.

the problem is the milk. he loves it, really. creamer, too. he's gotten used to drinking black coffee with maybe a sugar to taste because he can't really be bothered to take lactaid for coffee ( and let's be honest, the lactaid really curbs the stomach pain, you still get the digestive issues ). he's not fond of soy replacements ( don't get him started on soy and how every year there are more and more studies about how unhealthy it really is for you ) and while he can drink the nut milks ( oat, almond, etc ) it's just not dairy milk and it really doesn't scratch that itch.

also, to be completely fair, the wateriness of nut milks kind of skeeve him out with cereal, so he has to not look at the cereal when he's eating it with those.

while he usually has a bottle of lactaid in his satchel, he often forgets to replace it when it gets low or honestly just raw-dogs it into something and suffers the stomach pain + digestive trauma thereafter. ( he also eats tums like candy when his stomach is bothering him. bad spence ).

but really, ice cream is his favorite treat and he's not picky about flavors or brand. he's hurt his belly more often than not on it, and i'm pretty sure the local pharmacy near his apartment keeps a bottle of various digestive aids on hand for him. he frequents that pharmacy a lot, actually.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

237 of 2023

Have you been wearing homemade masks or store-bought ones?

Both, but since the beginning of 2022 face masks are not mandatory anymore in Europe, unless in hospitals.

What state (or country) do you live in?

Belgium.

Do you call yourself stupid a lot?

Sometimes it happens.

When was the last time you were sick?

Well, I have a cold right now. Which is bad since I have a doctor’s appointment in an hour.

Are you listening to music right now?

No, I’m not.

What are you severely allergic to, if anything?

Not severely, but I’m allergic to dogs, pollen, dust and nuts.

Is your room a mess?

Always. Shame on me.

What is the book you are reading (or that last book you read) about?

A family with supernatural abilities.

Is there a Kmart in your town?

No, we don’t have these in Europe.

What is your newest favorite website?

None, all of my favourites have been favourites for years.

Do you have a headache right now?

No, thankfully. Two days ago I had a terrible headache.

Do you have embarrassing memories of stupid things you’ve done?

Who doesn’t, honestly.

What was the last video you watched on youtube?

“If you’re happy and you know it say meow” 😂

Does your stomach hurt right now?

No, but two days ago it was horrible as well.

What was the last thing you cooked on the stove?

Soup.

Are you wearing socks?

Always.

What month is your birthday, and what month would u change it to if u could?

What’s even the point of this question? My birthday is in April, period.

Do you think it’s ok to call yourself stupid?

No, but I do it anyway.

What color Christmas tree do you want when you have a house someday?

White, but I already live on my own.

Have you ever had to use an epi pen?

No, I haven’t.

Do you have nice neighbors?

Half of them I don’t even know, but some of them are okay.

Do you know the names of 3 of your neighbors? (list if you can)

I know for sure there’s Arno and Pascal, but that’s it. And back in time there was Sebastian, but he sold his house and moved out.

What was the last thing you cooked that you burnt or cooked for too long?

I don’t remember, must have been years ago.

If you could have a car in any color, which color would you choose?

We have a black car and it was our choice.

What was the last grocery store you shopped at?

Albert Heijn.

What was the last type of milk you drank?

Vanilla flavoured milk.

What flavor was the last smoothie you drank?

I don’t drink such things.

Do you have a Magic Bullet?

I barely know what it is.

Do memories from your past come back to haunt you ?

Sometimes.

Do you believe in angels and demons?

No, not really.

Have you ever seen an angel?

Yeah, in form of some people.

Have you ever seen a demon?

Also in form of some people.

What color was the last sweatshirt you wore?

My hoodie is like off-white.

Do you plan to vote in the next election?

I have no choice, voting in my country is mandatory for citizens.

Who was president when you were born?

I live in a kingdom, so I don’t care.

[duskamethyst]

stranger danger.

a/n: did i sit on top of my car to imagine this? sure did. a part of the jujutsu hub collab! thank you vee @suna-reversed for organizing this horny event for us horny people.

word count: 3.8k

genre: smut, nsfw, pwp

warnings: dubcon, literally dumbass porn, degradation + praising kink, daddy kink, gun play, mentions of alcohol consumption, dui and death, public sex, overstimulation, squirting, creampie, implied kidnapping

pairing: criminal!toji x f!reader

summary: dozing off in a parking lot seems dangerous but it seems like the right thing to do. that is, until a mysterious man taps on your window.

you shouldn’t have trusted yourself. you’ve vowed to yourself not to drink tonight, especially when you were driving to the city by yourself. maybe one drink wouldn’t hurt, you thought. but that one drink led you to another until you eventually found yourself light headed and could barely walk in a straight line let alone drive home.

so now you decide it’s best to just stop in a random parking lot and doze off for a couple of hours until you’re certain that you’re sober and ready to continue your journey back home. thankfully the lights are on and there are a few other empty cars in the lot, giving you somewhat a sense of security.

even though you aren’t completely sane at the moment, you make sure the doors are locked, turn off the engine and roll your windows down slightly to allow ventilation. if you could avoid a possible car crash, might as well avoid dying from inhaling some fatal gas. so you push back your seat and close your eyes to let sleep take you over.

but it isn’t for long until you hear a knock on the window.

startled and confused, you instantly get up thinking it would be one of the securities patrolling the area, telling you to scram but you’re only met with a rather handsome man, tall and brawny standing next to your car.

he leans down to your eye level and glares at you intimidatingly before he speaks, “get out.”

in such a panicky situation, your heavy cluttered brain doesn’t really tell you what to do nor what the hell is happening so you only stare back at him tongue tied, unable to properly gauge the situation thanks to both chemicals in your system and adrenaline pumping through your veins.

“are you deaf?” he snarls with anger distorting his face.

the sharp eyes piercing through you coupled with the discernible scar on his lips go so well into his menacing demeanor and you’re aware he’s getting impatient. unsure of what to do, your hand reaches for your keys to turn on the engine, thinking it’s best to leave but he bangs on the window as if to tell you that isn’t what he wanted.

“i only told you to get out. so, get the fuck out. now.” toji waits for you to comply, but instead you just sit there frozen and he sighs in exasperation. “look, i have a fucking gun. and if you don’t do as i say, i won’t hesitate to shoot your brains off. you don’t need it anyway, right?”

toji fishes out his gun, waving it in front of you in warning. “and you’d be fucking dumb to think it isn’t loaded.”

the threatening sight of the firearm is finally what makes you unlock your doors and he immediately swings the door open and pulls you out from your vehicle by the wrist. toji eyes you up and down, taking a special interest in the mini skirt you don with a filthy smirk across his face. he peeks inside the car briefly, delighted over the fact that you’re all alone in the middle of the night– in some deserted parking lot, no less.

“where were you from?” he suddenly asks with less gruff in his tone. the eyes raking up and down your smaller frame so flagrantly makes you feel small and vulnerable.

you lick your lips to return moisture lost to parched skin as your eyes shift from his gun to his face. “a party.”

“a party, hm?” he does a double take on your whole skimpy outfit, sending a plethora of titillating thoughts to run in his head and waking up his primal instincts. he hasn’t gotten his dick wet for a while and opportunities don’t come by so easily when he’s a man on the run. he’d have to be an idiot to let this chance slip through his fingers.

“must’ve put a lot of thought on your outfit tonight. why don’t you give me a little twirl?”

toji deliberately taps the gun on the side of his thigh, reminding you what could happen if you either scream or run. getting the hint, you decide to entertain him, knowing well that you could end up with a bullet in any part of your body if you try to escape.

but do you oppose the idea of a sickeningly attractive man trying to check you out with a weapon in his hand? not really. if anything, the alarming nature of the affair only gives a delicious thrill to your already messed up nerves.

his predatory gaze is fixed on your voluptuous curves and the little sway of your hips as you gracelessly turn around in your heels, making blood rush straight down to his cock before telling you to stop.

“get in front of the car.” he urges.

“huh? why?”

toji cocks the loaded gun in front of you, his expression turning stern and serious once more. “no talking, just do it.”

you walk towards the front with the gun behind your head, careful not to miss your step until you’re facing your car.

“hands on the hood.” he demands, dark eyes silently watching you do as you’re told like a well-trained dog.

you’re certain he can see your ass cheeks peeking underneath the hem of your skirt as cold air hits your skin. the thought of a pair of eyes staring you down hungrily forms an anticipative knot to pull tightly in your stomach as your mind wonders about the dirty things he might and could do to you.

the next thing you feel is the cool metal of the barrel under your skirt, making you shudder as it caresses your puffy folds before dragging upwards to hike up the hem of your unbearably short skirt in favor of checking your panties but oh, what a delightful surprise– not a single thread underneath it all.

“no panties?” he bites back a groan when he notices the glistening slick coated around his black gun. “don’t tell me you’re getting off to this?”

“‘m not–” you deny meekly despite the blossoming heat between your thighs growing bigger when you feel the tip of the barrel against your drenched cunt again.

“don’t lie. you’re a little slut aren’t you? went to a party without your panties on– something tells me you’re an attention whore.” he mocks, poking the gun against your entrance only to observe your little squirms.

“not a slut!” you whine giddily as you spontaneously grind against the long barrel in seek of relief for the dull ache that has formed in your core.

“no? you’re gonna tell me you’re not jerking off to my gun right now?” he chastises with a satirical smile on his lips, feeling his cock harden even more from watching the way you’re eagerly rubbing against the gun he currently holds in his hand.

“i– i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you try not to let your words slur as you play coy, even when breaths are already hitching in your throat.

“oh yeah? ‘cause that cunt is positively leaking right now.” you whimper at his words, being bad and filthy never felt so good– especially to a man you don’t even know. “bet you want me to fill that needy cunt.”

“mhm!” you mewl, gyrating your hips even more salaciously once you manage to find an angle to rub your sensitive clit, sending waves of sensations to every fiber and nerve in your body.

“now that’s an honest little slut.” he coos with amusement lacing in his voice. “why don’t you beg for it?”

you tilt your head back towards him, bottom lip jutting out into a cute pout and eyes pleading. “please..?”

toji lets out a huff, “not good enough, sweetheart.”

your eyes narrow at him, hoping he can read the desperation in them as you call him in the softest mewl that you've used to numerous guys before. “daddy.”

“hmm?” he strokes your clit by rubbing the gun back and forth and watches you quiver with a lopsided grin across his face.

“w-want– need your cock, daddy.” you pant in a shameless expression of your need for him.

“what do you need daddy to do to you, pretty girl?” he studies the barrel, now smeared with your slick.

“need daddy to fuck me– fuck my little tight cunt.”

toji draws his gun away and raises it at the back of your head. “then, get on your knees.”

you don’t need to be told twice as you instantly turn around and face him, the gun now pointing directly to your forehead and follows you even until you’re already kneeled in front him.

“you went a little too fast there, didn’t you?” he chuckles, the sound is smoky and alluring. “so eager. now, take off my pants.”

your hand reaches up to unbuckle his belt and undo his button before pulling the zipper down and tugging off his pants and briefs hastily. your mouth waters at the sight; his thick cock is already throbbing, tip flushing red and leaking precum with a prominent vein on the underside – causing you to quickly disregard the life-threatening weapon in front of your head.

seeing you blatantly gawk at him causes pride to spiral in his chest, as if you’ve never seen a dick before. but is it bad for toji to assume that you've never seen a dick as big as his?

“getting nervous now?” he teases. “fuck that. put it inside your mouth.”

toji exhales sharply once your tongue carefully licks off the salty pre on the tip, rousing him further with only kitten licks until the barrel nudges your head in warning, forcing you to stop your ministrations.

“are you asking to get a hole through your head?” he scowls, showing apparent irritation.

“no.” you answer meekly.

“then? i told you to put it inside your fucking mouth.”

“‘m sorry, daddy.” you wrap your fingers around the base of his cock and give it a few pumps up and down his shaft in hopes to please him and calm him down. “promise i’ll be a good girl.”

“then stop fucking around.”

without a second to waste, you wrap your lips around his cock and hollow your cheeks, squeezing and milking his cock with your tongue and throat as your head bobs up and down. you graze your tongue on the underside and slowly drag upwards, following the curve of his vein before giving a harsh suck on his tip, drawing out a loud groan from his throat.

“look at daddy.”

and you do, fixing your gaze with his darker ones as you slobber his cock with so much drool and you relax your throat in order to force yourself down to the base, devouring him whole even as he tilts the gun next to your head.

“wish i had my phone right now. you should see how you look.” his other hand reaches the top of your head, holding you in place and causes you to choke slightly before jerking his hips forward and begins to fuck your throat.

squelching noises resonate in the silent air, mingled with his grunts. drool starts to seep from the corners of your mouth and tears begin to well up in your eyes as his heavy balls slap against your chin.

“boys must really love you, hm?” you can feel the tension in his fingers as he puts monumental effort into restraining himself and he finally draws his gun away. “just taking it like a good girl.”

you can only whimper around his cock, the praise making you feel hotter that you find your hand between your thighs to push a finger inside your wet cunt.

“fuck– yeah, keep touching yourself like that.” he growls, the sound rumbling in his chest as the vibrations from your muffled moans are slowly sending him to the brink of an orgasm.

you’re too immersed by your own finger pumping in and out to even care about the ache that has formed on your jaw but the moment you feel his cock twitching, you both know it won’t be long until he breaks down.

“you’re gonna swallow all of it. got it?” he states more than questions, feeling his balls tightening as he starts to lose the last remaining control he owns.

you hum in response and flutter your eyes close and you wait until his hips still before he spurts thick ropes of cum down your throat, invading all your senses with the bitter taste of his load.

once he has emptied, you pull away with your tongue gliding along his length, not forgetting to lick off the sensitive slit to clean off any remnants.

“open your mouth.” he demands. you part your puffy lips and stick your tongue out, showing your obedience to his prior order and a delightful smirk makes its way on his face upon seeing that you’ve downed every drop of his cum. “good girl.”

“to be honest, i didn’t think you’d cum quickly.” you blurt out bluntly.

his brows furrow and his face contorts into a scowl. “‘fuck did you say?”

you shrug nonchalantly. you don’t know where it’s coming from either– the alcohol still lingering in your veins or the fact that you feel beyond proud that you’ve made him, some guy who claimed that he wanted to rob your car cum so fast. “well, all the guys told me i give the best head but none of them ever–”

“get up. face the car.”

toji clicks his tongue as you blink at him in confusion and he grabs your arm to pull you up on your feet before spinning you around and bending you down on the hood with his body pressing against your back. you swallow nervously when you feel a nudge against your ass, his dick is still hard despite the fact that he has cummed just a minute ago.

“you’re gonna regret that. once i fucking ravage that little cunt, you’re gonna be begging for me to cum quick.” he leans down to your ear as he threatens, sending shivers up and down your spine.

“i’m sor–”

“no. i won’t give a shit if it hurts you or when you cry for me to stop.”

toji gives a harsh smack on the plump flesh, making you jolt in surprise. with your hands down on the hood, he lifts up one of your knees on top of the car, causing you to spread wide open in an instant before he impatiently pokes the tip of his cock against your pulsating hole.

“but that’s what you want, right?”

your eyes roll back, lips parting in an appreciative squeal as you feel his fat cock stretches you out accompanied with a delicious burn when he sinks in deeper.

“mmh– s-so big–!”

“yeah? never had a dick this big before?” toji pulls out almost completely, eyes fixed on the cock glistening with your slick under the street lights, not missing the white cream attached onto the skin.

“n-no– ah–!”

toji cuts you off with one hard slam of his hips, drilling his cock into your tight pussy in a brutal pace while you keen and whimper as it brushes against your walls, each stretch and drag inside you so exquisite while deep crescent shapes of his nails form on your pliant skin as he holds you firmly by the hips for leverage.

“no wonder you’re so fucking tight. stupid boys didn’t know how to fuck you right.” his words thrum in a burst of heat as he growls in your ear, breaking through your every thought.

you tilt your head towards him with heavy lidded eyes and meet his lust addled gaze. your mouth is gaping in breathless moans, tongue slightly lolled out from your lips as you try to reach closer to his scarred lips, wanting to crash your lips onto his before it stretches into a devilish smirk and you feel warm liquid lands on your palate.

“you looked like you were begging to taste my spit.” he mocks. toji watches as you eagerly swallow it down your throat and he lets out a brittle chuckle. “dirty slut.”

your pussy flutters upon hearing how he degrades you, causing you to buck your hips wildly against him in an attempt to meet his thrusts.

“you liked that, didn’t you? i can feel you clamping down on me like a fucking whore.” he derides, fucking you harder and deeper until your world is reduced into nothing but the way he makes you feel completely stuffed and filled, the cockhead kissing your cervix with each deep strokes.

“please– make me cum, daddy–” you keen as pressure pulls taut in your lower stomach, the slick noises are so loud that the both of you can hear them even through your moans.

your body flushes against his, so close together and you can only focus on the sounds of flesh against flesh, the salacious rhythm making you more delirious.

“then, cum for me. let me feel you gush all over me.” toji brings his fingers to rub against your clit, easily tipping you over the edge by pressing tight circles until you find yourself crashing down with an orgasm exploding throughout your body.

“you want more?” he taunts, helping you ride out the aftershock by continuously rutting his hips into your cunt and not giving you the slightest chance to recuperate.

“ah– ‘s too much–” you whimper as soon as the pleasure begins to numb and you clutch onto his wrist tightly to try and pry his hand away from your sensitive clit.

“too much? don’t think that i’m done with you yet.”

toji finally draws away from you, but only turns you around to face him and effortlessly puts you on top of the hood with your elbows propping your weight. with his hands, he spreads and keeps your legs apart before sheathing his cock back inside your pulsing cunt again, completely mindless of your pathetic sobs. he lifts up your top, not surprised over the lack of bra underneath and he intently watches the way your tits bounce with each merciless pound of his cock.

“s-stop– please–” you whimper feebly as you try to shut your trembling legs together but he doesn’t budge and only keeps his grip on your thighs even tighter, stretching out your pussy for him wider.

“fucking take it.”

toji ignores your plea and his head dips low to your chest, latching his mouth onto one of your nipples and starts to flick it with his tongue coupled with harsh sucks until he pulls back with a pop and watches as the nipple stands erect before assaulting the other, swiftly sending sparks of pleasure down to the bundle of nerves.

“might as well keep you around. be my personal fucktoy. would you like that?” he grins up at you to see your jaw slacking, mouth falling in a wide ‘o’ as the burn down your core begins to cease.

“yesyesyes– make me your slut–!” your toes curl, making your heels drop down to the ground while your knuckles turn white from squeezing your hands into balled fists too hard.

“yeah? you’d do anything for a good fuck, huh?” he sneers at you, although he’s fascinated with your state of arousal.

“mhm– need daddy to fill me up with his cum–” your back rests against the car, reveling in the feeling of his cock abusing your swollen cunt like you’re nothing but a sex doll.

“but daddy’s not gonna cum yet. not even when you’re tightening around him like this.” toji slams your hips down closer to him, fucking into you deeper and harder with his heavy balls smacking your ass.

“t-too deep–! daddy, i’ll–” you babble, losing the ability to form cohesive words as you feel a strange knot twisting rapidly in your guts. the feeling is too intense and unbearable– the refined drags of his vein brushing against your spongy walls is anything but agonizing.

“come on. use your big girl words.” he drags out slowly and quickly pumps back into you ruthlessly. “or are you too dumb already?”

“i’m gonna–”

toji lifts up your legs over his shoulders as he leans down closer to you and he nips on your pulse point, causing your body to tense as your hands find home in his dark locks and tight shirt.

as soon as he lets go, your pupils are blown wide as pleasure washes throughout your body and you feel yourself gushing around the cock still buried inside you along with a broken moan from your lips. the release is oddly more relieving than your prior orgasm, making your body feel lighter as your mind ascends to a state of euphoria. you find yourself panting heavily as you squirt all over him, staining his black shirt with clear fluid and with some of it dribbling down to his thick thighs.

“making such a mess on daddy.” he groans as he feels your walls convulse around him rapidly, milking his cock dry and slowly dragging him down to his own high for the second time of the night.

you can only look at him in a cockdaze with no particular thoughts running inside your head, each one formed gone like popping bubbles. your eyes glued onto every bit of his features; the brows furrowed in concentration, the lips parting in grunts, the damp matted hair against his forehead and you drink the sight of it all even when you’re not sure if you’ll remember it all the next morning.

“fuck– it’d be a shame to not cum inside this pretty cunt, right?” his thrusts turn sporadic, dick twitching as a telltale of his pending orgasm that’s soon to crash down over him. he didn’t need to hear your answer as he ruts into you faster, hips stuttering out of control before a low, guttural sound escapes his throat as he shoots hot ropes of cum, flooding into your womb and stuffing you full with his seed.

and once he lets go of your legs you can feel your whole body sore all over, but you can’t bring yourself to care nor whatever is going to happen after this when the man in front of you has given you what you truly wanted and made you feel satiated like you’ve never felt before.

toji pulls out his spent cock and runs a hand through his hair before putting his pants back on. a cocky smirk graces his lips at the sight of your fucked out body, still splayed on top of the hood with his cum dribbling out from your pussy.

he presses your cheeks together with one hand and forces you to look at him, even as your lids are getting heavy to lift.

“i was serious about you being my fucktoy– and stealing your car.” he cackles. “so, do you wanna be in the back seat or do you prefer the trunk?”

duskamethyst © 2020 • all rights reserved. do not modify, translate or repost anywhere.

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[emithecharmer]

As Boyfriends (Edited)

Chan

Very positive

He always makes sure that you know he's there if you need him

Kisses please, he loves giving and receiving

Likes it when you're in the studio with him

He'll have you on his lap or you'll be in the chair beside him

He gets weak when you run your hands through his hair

You love his natural hair

You do online school, so you can pretty much be everywhere with him (which he wants, for safety ofc)

He absolutely loves it when you order food, you always know what he wants, and you always get food for him too

He makes sure you drink lots of water

For the girls

Always helps you with your cycle, he keeps track of it in case you forget, and you best know he has a little bag in the studio

Kinda becomes a personal hot pack

May sound weird but you like it when he lays on you when you have cramps

He was really hesitant at first to lay on you but after you practically begged him, he relented

Now it's just normal, you had cramps one day and you were at their dorms watching a movie. Chan noticed and practically jumped on you, making the others yell at him, telling him to not flatten you

Minho

Constant banter

You two make fun of each other a lot

You bring up his days on nat geo a little too much

He makes sure his cats approve of you before kissing you for the first time :/

It's ok though because you have 2 cats

He comes over to say hi to them

If he ever feels he went a bit too far with a joke, he'll apologize and cuddle you, or make you food

Forehead kisses are a must, they make him feel safe

For the girls

He'll make fun of you, saying it doesn't hurt that bad, however after some research and a couple calls to his mom, he feels bad

He bakes you treats and buys you whatever you need during your cycle

He'll rub your stomach if you want

He knows that baths are really nasty during that time but trust me when it's over he'll draw you as many as you want

Will watch movies with you and wipe your tears if you cry

Changbin

Cuddles.

Rarely a moment where you're not in his arms

He honestly just can't get enough of you

He brings you to the studio and asks for your opinion, it doesn't hurt that you have an ear for music as well

He really wants you two to go public so you can go on dates without hiding but completely and utterly understands if you don't want to yet

He introduced you to his family and they loved you, his sister especially

You and his sister go on girls dates when he's busy sometimes

For the girls

He knows everything

Asked his sister right away

"Does she need chocolate" "Will she hurt me if I don't get chocolate??" "What do I do?"

Gets you everything you need and more

You saw a cute plushie in the store and when you went home it was on your bed

Was not the best surprise though due to you two watching a horror movie the night before

Hyunjin

You are best friends with his parents, and he with yours

You're a foreigner, so his parents weren't too keen of the idea at first

However you grew on them when they really saw how you two interacted with each other, almost as if you two were tied together

You are his number one supporter and he's yours

He'll bring Kkami to you and you'll dogsit him because he loves you

Hyunjin's jealous of your relationship :(

For the girls

Gifts??

He's a giver, which makes you feel upset at first before you realize it's how he wants it to be

Not super affectionate usually, however, when you want him to cuddle you he will without a doubt

He learned some baking from Felix so be prepared

He messed up a recipe one time and almost gave you food poisoning, luckily you noticed the smell and checked the milk

You still tease him about it

Han

Brings you to convenience stores late at night

You two fill up three baskets and go back to your apartment

Watching dramas are a must with him

He loves forehead kisses, please give him some

They make him feel safe

He's the little spoon, again, it makes him feel safe

You two go shopping a bit too much

You introduced him to the wonderful world of iced caramel lattes

He'll never be the same

For the girls

Husband material

He does everything in his power to make you comfortable

You got a stain on the bed, not a big one but a small circle, he woke you up so gently it made you cry

"Hey baby, get up for a second okay?" He carried you to the bathroom so you could fix yourself while he took off the sheets and put on new ones. You came out crying, thinking it was disgusting.

"No it's not honey, it's natural, don't worry about it. You're fine love, go back to sleep mk?"

Sweetest thing istg

Felix

Singing in the car at the top of your lungs

He realized you could sing really well and asked if you could sing something, secretly sending a recording to Chan

He begged for you to sing something in one of their new songs, you made sure it was under 6 words

No one except the 8 of them and some of their team knew you were dating, and his family of course

He's close with your mom, liking to hear stories of you when you were little

He knew your dad wasn't really in the picture but if you wanted to talk to him, Felix would be supportive

He loves your eyes, they're a really vibrant green, always complimenting them

You do the same with his freckles, you like to draw so while he was asleep you drew his freckles as constellations in your sketchbook

He and Hyunjin were snooping one day and found it, he cried :(

For the girls

Has a sister so he knows wassup

He already loves baking, so why not bake for his beautiful girlfriend

Kisses your stomach

"Stop it's bloated" "More for me to love"

Always makes you feel confident

Seungmin

You got a puppy, expecting it to be tiny, but it was a whole ass doberman

You two got it right before he went on tour, so when he came back and you opened the door, he screamed

You named him Ghost, when he asked why you said it was your favorite cover he did

He has a frog, don't ask why

Has a secret instagram where he posts aesthetic couple photos, without your faces ofc

Is actually pretty popular on the account

He accidentally mentioned it on a live and that's how he came out with the news of your relationship

He loves cuddles from you, back hugs from you get him weak

He likes how you look at him when he sings

One time they were filming and you sneezed, really loud, apologizing to the staff quietly

"BLESS YOU Y/N" "Jisung shut up"

For the girls

Another guy with a sister

He massages your back, knowing how sore it gets

Gets you oils for headaches

Helps you with your stomach issues by flopping on you :0

Kisses you on your head

Makes sure you're comfortable all the time

I.N

You're his first relationship, he's really nervous

You have to initiate everything at first

You two were kissing, for a short amount of time before his members walked in

"WOAH INNIE" He ran away leaving you there :|

Gets comfortable later on, initiating things more often

Likes it way too much when you walk in front of him, the way you walk with such confidence

And your as-

He's been with Minho too much

For the girls

No clue at all

If you're being too annoying he'll literally push you

However after seeing 10 seconds of that '100 years of periods' video he'll be a bit better

Will still push you though, only onto the couch

He'll buy you a lot of food though

[sinning-23]

Sleep Headcanons

Arcane simps lets gooooo

Sevika

-she doesn't get a lot of sleep (fucking thanks a lot Silco)

-when she does she make sure you're tucked close to her.

-hates sleeping on her mechanic arm because it makes a loud whirring noise

-likes slinging one arm over you, or having contact with you in some way

-please play with her hair, she got it pulled back 24/7 I know she got a headache from it

-talks in her sleep'

-snores

Silco

-bad bitches have sleep apnea

-rarely sleeps, because bad bitches also handle business

-can't seem to get comfortable when he sleeps so he's always tossing and turning.

-expect to wake up with him draped over the side of the bed somehow.

-will never admit that he sleeps like a fucking psycho and wears socks to bed

-has a skincare routine before he sleeps (I don't make the rules)

-quite literally "one eye open when I'm sleeping"

-has night terrors and won't tell you about it. Kinda hurts but you respect that you aren't on that level with him yet

Mel

-sleeps like a fucking vampire

-cannot sleep without drinking milk first

...weirdo shit

-either sleeps with the lights on or something playing

-goes to bed early like the bad bitch she is. Beauty sleep is essential

-sleeps naked

-fetal position

-for the love of gods don't wake her up unless you have a death wish

-also talks in her sleep

Vi

-big cuddler

-will probably roll over on top of you

-HEAVY sleeper

-will get upset about the blanket ratio

"you have more blanket than me! Look!"

-prefers to be the big spoon

-kisses your nose if you fall asleep first

-always has the ac blasting and it never bothers her but you're over there looking like frosty the god damn snowman

-yawns really loud for emphasis of how tired she is

Viktor

-AS STATED BEFORE...BAD! BITCHES! HANDLE! BUSINESS!

therefore he doesn't sleep much

-will make you drag him to bed

-puts up a fuss about nir needing sleep and something about 'science never sleeping'

-passes out as soon as he hits the pillow

-I feel like he wears a bonnet lmao I can't get that out my head

-also has a skincare routine. he doesn't do it often but when he does its serious business

I'm talking serums and oils and 4 different cleaners with 2 separate exfoliants

-always says "sweet dreams my love" and kisses your cheek

Vander

-SOUNDS LIKE A DAMN VOLCANO WHEN HE SNORES

-BOMBS IT SOUNDS LIKE BOMBS

-and then there's a long silence and you have to play the

"is he dead right now" game before he snores again

-loves to have you fall asleep on his chest

-can sleep without blankets, they always end up on the floor anyway since he kicks them off so much

-holds your hand when you fall asleep

-surprisingly light sleeper, he usually scared himself away with that fucking ANIMAL snoring

Jinx

-has nightmares

-doesn't like sleeping sometimes so she'll just stay awake for days

-"jinx please go to bed"

"nah

-when you can get her to lay down she clings to you

-loves being little spoon

-lots and lots and lots of pilloes and blankets

-talks a LOT in her sleep

"take the piza out the dishwasher "

"huh?...oh shes sleep"

Ekko

-can sleep almost anywhere

-sleeps on his stomach and gets mad when his chest hurts the next day from being compressed on it

-durag...need I say more? matching bonnets anyone?

-also snores but its very rare

-drools but won't admit it

"Okay then what is this? this big ass wet stop where your FACE is"

"I don't know what you're talking about. maybe it rained?"

"over your face? inside the room?

"yes"

-makes sure you have water by your side of the bed in case you get thirsty at 3 am.

[katyasrussianaccent]

i don't wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips (corpse x reader)

Summary: Corpse suggests you flirt with each other to mess with the fans. What happens when you suddenly catch feelings?

Authors Note: This has been in my brain for so long so I decided to write it. May or may not write a part 2, im not sure. Lemme know what you think! My requests are open for fic/headcannons aswell 💖

It should have been simple.

Flirt, mess with the fans a little, sit back and relax.

It should have been simple.

You remember Corpse coming to you with the idea.

“Why would we do that?” you had asked, frowning at your phone screen. It had been another late night phone conversation with him; something that was starting to become a regular occurrence.

You pictured him shrug as he answered. “Fun?”

“Are you so bored you wanna make a fake relationship with me?”

“Not a relationship. Just do what we do now, but like, more.”

You had agreed before your brain had even registered it. On paper it was straightforward. You already flirted a little anyway, you were naturally a flirtatious person, and so was he. It made sense; or at least you had told yourself that it did. You knew the fans already shipped you together, you saw the things they tweeted as you occasionally lurked the ynhusband tag on Twitter. It was just innocent fun right? No-one was going to get hurt.

For a little while that was true. For a little while he called you baby and you called him darling and it meant nothing. Your face didn’t feel flush when he commented on your latest Instagram post and your heart didn’t do a little flip when he would call you just to see how you were. The phone conversations were your favourite; curled up in bed with the phone on your pillow, trading secrets into the night. He had suddenly become this constant in your life, this almost routine familiarity like brushing your teeth or going to get milk.

You weren’t sure what changed, when it had gone from being innocent fun to meaning something. It was like someone had flicked a switch, and Corpse was no longer a warm glow but this bright, blinding light that hurt your eyes to look at too long. It was almost cruel, the way you wanted something so unobtainable; the universe’s idea of a joke had no humour in it. The thing with Corpse was he was so unaware of the power he had. He was mysterious yes, but he was faceless among a sea of faces; of course people were drawn to him. And you were just another.

You started to pull away. You played different games with different people, you ignored his tweets. It was easier, if you never interacted with him, you could pretend there was nothing but shallow feelings instead of the crashing waves that threatened to pull you under. The fans had started to notice; your streams were filled with questions that you refused to answer.

“Where’s Corpse?” you read aloud as you scrolled down the chat. “Probably in his house? Go ask him.” Your tone was bitter even to you and you inwardly cringed. He hadn’t contacted you in 2 weeks, and while you were thankful, you were hurt by it. It was stupid and hypoctritical of you to be upset by something that was your own doing, and you weren’t sure what you had expected from him. He had other friends, other people to talk to, why would he have cared about you anyway?

Your phone lit up next to you, and you ignored the pang of disappointment at Rae’s picture flashing up.

Rae: Among Us???

You hesitated for a second. The likelihood of Corpse being there was high, but you knew deep down he wouldn’t say a thing to you, not on stream or in front of your friends. You could just ignore him, like you had been doing and it would be fine. You weren’t sure you believed yourself anymore.

“Guys, you want to watch me play Among Us? I’m not sure who’s playing, other than Rae.” You looked at the fast flowing stream of affirmatives and emojis. Guess you had to do it now. You opened up the game and joined the lobby.

“-yeah she looks really fucking cute,” you heard Corpse say as you logged in. You looked down at your outfit,; he definitely wasn’t talking about you in your oversized t-shirt and sweatpants. You had been on stream for a few hours now; your eyeliner was smudged a little and any lipstick had worn off with the constant drinking and licking your lips. No, he definitely wasn’t talking about you.

“Hey guys,” you said tentatively, swallowing down the feeling of jealousy at Corpse’s previous words.

A chorus of greetings hit you, and you smiled at their enthusiasm. You had played with Rae, Sykunno and Toast a few times before, but Felix, Jack and Ash were new to you, though you knew of them.

“Hey Y/N,” Corpse said. You had hoped after 2 weeks he wouldn’t still affect you so much, but the way your stomach turned said otherwise.

“Hey Corpse,” you replied, hoping your tone was casual.

“I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?” he asked.

“Oh. Uh yeah, I’ve been a bit busy I guess, how are you?” You looked down as you answered, picking at your nail polish. You glanced at the chat that was filled with messages.

corpsesbaby: You can always tell when someones lying coz they look down” llamadelrey: why is this so awkward lmao arent they friends??” simpsforrae: This is like is a breakup i swear

“I’ve been okay, thanks” Corpse answered, drawing your eyes off the chat and back to the game. You nodded as you muted your mic to go back to your stream.

“I hope I don’t get imposter, I always suck at that so much.” You watched as the screen counted down and the word IMPOSTER flashed up alongside Corpse’s name. “Guess I jinxed it guys.”

Great. Not only were you imposter, you were imposter with Corpse, which meant you would have to actually speak to him. Maybe you wouldn’t have to.

You both followed Rae as she walked up towards Greenhouse, and you cornered her while she did her task, killing her quickly.

“Everyone seemed to go right, so we should vent back towards cafeteria to avoid suspicion,” Corpse said.

“Okay,” you answered. You vented together, and you muted your mic to laugh. “This is kinda cosy guys.” You said to your chat. You briefly imagined what it would be like in real life to be so close to him.

You moved to Admin where Toast was doing his task. Before you could say a word, Corpse had already killed him and you both vented outside Cafeteria. “Fuck, that was so close,” you muttered, chuckling a little.

“Don’t worry, I got your back,” he replied, making your heart sing a little.

“Oh my hero,” you said, making a point of swooning to your chat, your voice high and airy. “How will I ever repay you?”

He chuckled, “You shouldn’t ask questions like that.”

You flushed at the suggestive tone he had taken, and you hoped it wasn’t noticeable but judging by the comments in your chat, it clearly had been. This was another issue you had with Corpse; he always made these type of comments with you and it was really annoying. You knew there was no chance he was being serious, and sometimes you wished he would stop it purely because it got your hopes up.

delilah: shes BLUSHING dreamofme: uWu yn uWu

You opened your mouth to respond when Dead Body Reported flashed up, bringing your thoughts back to the game.

“Toast and Rae are dead,” Sykuuno said. “I found Rae in Greenhouse and Toast in admin.”

“I was in balcony, I went there from the cafeteria,” you said confidently. You hated being Imposter, especially being teamed with Corpse, who was so good at the game, you had a lot of pressure to do well.

“I was in MedBay, I didn’t see you YN,” Ash accused.

“You only see if they enter through the left door. She entered through the other door,” Corpse answered for you.

“And how do you know that?” Felix asked.

“I was in Cafeteria,” Corpse replied.

“You could’ve vented YN,” Jack said.

“No I couldn’t have, if Ash was in MedBay, she would have seen me. Unless she wasn’t in MedBay,” you suggested, smirking to your cam as you muted. “It’s not going too bad I don’t think? Always feel like I’ve been arrested when I’m Imposter.”

“Little sus of you Ash to say you were in MedBay when you weren’t,” Corpse said. You gaped a little at how easy it was for him to manipulate the situation, it was almost scary.

Ash argued as the other players began to agree and discuss among themselves. You smiled in success at the text on the screen.

Ash has been ejected.

You split up this time, and while you hadn’t really spoken during the game, you kind of missed Corpse’s astronaut next to yours, and you said that to your chat. “Haha, our colours did look cute together, I agree.”

Any previous trepidation you had had disappeared as soon as you had heard his voice; and you realised how much you had missed him. You would simply just need to deal with your feelings; they would go away eventually anyway. You just hoped it wasn’t too late for you to start again with him.

You walked to MedBay with Skyunno, making small talk as you did.

“I’m glad to see you playing with us, it’s been a little while,” he said and you felt bad that you would have to kill him. As you turned towards him, ready to kill as he did his task, Jack walked in. You mouthed oops at the cam.

“What’s going on here?” Jack asked, suspicion in his voice.

“I was just saying how nice it was to have YN here,” Sykunno replied. You stood and faked your task, watching the green bar fill as you did. It would be too risky to kill here.

“Ah yeah, Corpse has been asking after you constantly,” Jack said. You blinked at the response, it had caught you off guard.

“Oh?” you replied simply. You mentally shrugged it off. Of course he would have asked about you, you were friends, that was all.

DEAD BODY REPORTED

“Felix was dead in Reactor,” Corpse announced. “Oh Corpse, you’re taking a risk here” you said to your chat.

“I was in MedBay with Jack and Sykunno,” you replied, smiling as they agreed. “Where were you Ash?”

She sighed sadly. “I was in Labs, but I was doing a task, I swear!” You all agreed quickly that Ash would be the next voted out.

“2 to go,” you said triumphantly. “I thought I was gonna drag Corpse down, but it’s going okay!”

The round started again and you could feel yourself getting tired. Hopefully this wouldn’t be too much longer to finish the game.

You circled round Corpse a few times, hoping that he would understand your signal. Luckily he did, and you both vented to Decontamination where Skyunno and Jack were. The room had already started to emit steam, making it extremely easy for you both to vent unnoticed and kill them both.

You grinned at the Victory message that flashed up.

“Good game guys!” you said. The others congratulated you and Corpse on your win and you smiled at the sound of your names together. You had it bad.

“It was all YN,” Corpse said.

“Pfft you ssh being humble, it was all you,” you replied, taking your hair out of your ponytail and running your hand through it.

“Your hair looks nice,” Corpse commented and your eyes widened. Your heart started to beat a little quicker. How long had he been watching your stream?

“It’s bad to watch someone’s stream without telling them,” you replied, making a show of pouting for the camera.

He laughed a little. “What can I say, I’m a bad guy,” he said, singing the last words. You laughed at the sudden Billie Eilish.

“Guys, either play another game, or get a room,” Felix interrupted. You blushed a little and rolled your eyes, the chat going crazy from the corner of your eye.

“And that’s my cue to exit,” you said, yawning. “Bye guys, have a good night!” You wished everyone and your chat goodnight before closing the stream and leaning back in your chat. You couldn’t believe Corpse had been watching you. You hadn’t said anything too incriminating, but still.

You prepared for bed, settling back into the softness of your pillows as you grabbed your phone - a terrible habit you really needed to stop.

Corpse: Can I call you?

You gulped at the message that appeared on your screen, a gnawing feeling of nervous clung to your throat as you typed yes. His name came up almost instantaneously and your hand shook as you pressed to accept the call.

“Hey,” he greeted.

“Hey, what’s up?” you asked, trying to keep your voice even while your heart beat erratically in your chest.

“It was nice playing with you again,” he commented.

You sat up a little as you held the phone against your ear. “Did you call me to tell me that?”

“I haven’t spoken to you in a while.”

You sighed a little. “Yeah, I’ve been a bit busy, sorry - “

“You’re lying to me and I don’t know why,” he replied. You had never heard his voice like that before; so angry and hurt. You tapped your foot against your mattress as you thought what to say.

“I -”

“Did I do something?” he asked. You had been so selfish; blocking him out to avoid being hurt, but you hadn’t thought about his feelings. He was more popular than you were, you had assumed he would be fine, that he wouldn’t care if you were around or not.

“No, you didn’t do anything, I swear -”

“Then what? Because I thought we were friends, close friends and then suddenly you pretty much disappear. But you’re still streaming with other people. It’s pretty shitty of you.”

You chewed the inside of your cheek and looked up, the sting of tears threatening to fall. “It was really shitty of me, I’m sorry.”

“What happened?” he asked. “Please just tell me.”

“I don’t know what I’m meant to say,” you replied softly.

“What do you want to say?”

You blinked, the anticipation of unspoken words caught in your throat, making it hard to swallow. The taste of them was bitter on your tongue. “I...I have feelings for you.”

There. You had said it. There was no taking it back now, and you felt like your heart was about to shatter with every single second of silence that passed. You could hear him swallow on the other end of the phone. “Are you saying you’re in love with me?”

You bit your lip, taking in the meaning of the question he had asked. It wasn’t something you had thought of, you hadn’t conceptualised your feelings for him, not put them in a box labelled love or anything. “I don’t know. I feel something for you. And it kinda sucks being your friend and having those feelings. So I pulled away.”

“Why does it suck?”

You laughed bitterly. “Why wouldn’t it? Feeling something for someone that doesn’t feel the same is fucking shitty.”

“I asked you to flirt with me YN -”

“Yeah, for fun,” you interrupted.

“No, I said for fun, but really I just wanted you to,” he replied. “I feel something for you too. How could I not? Has anything I’ve ever said to you sounded like it was just for fun?” You smiled at his response, your heart no longer on the fit of breaking, but suddenly doing flips and soaring through your chest, radiating warmth through your body.

“Oh,” you said, your brain was overloaded with thoughts, and was apparently no longer capable of coherent sentences.

“Oh? That’s a great response, thanks,” he teased, but you could tell he was smiling as he spoke.

“I wasn’t expecting you to say that, I don’t really know what to say honestly,” you replied.

“Well, baby, how about you say yes to a date?” he asked.

“Yes.”

[julesclues]

Helloo how are you? I was wondering if you could do a jj smut in which him & reader are having rOuGh seggs but it's from jj’s pov. It’s ok if you’re not comfortable with it<3

You’re Mine

Warnings: smut, rough sex, oral (f receiving), choking, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it please), jealous! jj, 18+ themes

Word count: 1.93k

Pairing(s): JJ Maybank x reader

A/n: this is my first time writing smut, so I hope it’s good!

Summary: JJ and y/n are dating but when she starts talking to some random touron at a party, JJ gets jealous and reminds her who she really belongs to. (JJ’s perspective)

I watched as John B twirled Sarah to the beat of the music. Kiara and Pope were at the bar drinking God knows what. It sure made them get drunk quick though. As for y/n, I watched her intensely as she danced alone, in the middle of everyone. A goddess was an understatement. I downed my beer and made my way to her. I felt myself getting hard by just watching her. The way she swayed her hips with not a care in the world made me wonder how I managed to find a woman like her. Why she would even think about being with someone like me.

As I made my way to her, I saw a man approach her. He had blue eyes, a bit darker than mine, and a bit of a stubble lingering on his face. He was obviously drunk, but y/n being the oblivious beauty she is, thought he was just being friendly. I felt my fist tighten as my knuckles turned white with jealously. He wasn’t touching her or doing anything to her, but his intentions were obvious. At least to me they were. I got closer to listen to their conversation, but made sure not to involve myself just yet.

“Ya from around here?” His hard accent asked her. I rolled my eyes at his cliche attempt to get into her pants. “Yeah,” y/n chuckled. “Born and raised.” Her answers were short and sweet, I knew she was just trying to be friendly. I trusted her to not cheat on me, of course. But I didn’t trust him to not make a move. “So, you single?” He asks, getting closer to her. I felt my blood boiling. “No,” you say awkwardly. “I- uh. I have a boyfriend.” He hums in understanding but still moves closer to her. “What he doesn’t know won’t kill him, right?” He puts his hand on her shoulder, and that’s why I finally interfere. “Y/n, baby,” I say, spinning her around to look at me. Her eyes lit up as she looked at me. God, she was beautiful.

“This the boyfriend?” The guy asks, and she turn to him. “Yeah,” she answers nonchalantly. “Come on, we’re getting out of here,” I say roughly. Before leaving though, I make sure the guy knows that she’s mine. “Don’t talk to her again, got it?” I hiss. He rolls his eyes and walks away without a word. I pull y/n all the way to her house and slam the door shut. She jumps a bit, knowing I was angry. “I hate that guy,” I admit, pacing back and forth. All she does is chuckle, making me stop and look up at her. “It’s fine JJ,” she says, trying to reassure me. But for some reason, that made me more mad. “You saying you liked how he was trying to get in your pants?” I ask, getting close to her. She blinks a couple times, her eyes flickering to my lips and back up to my eyes.

“N-no,” she stutters, squeezing her thighs together. I smirk, eyes roaming her beautiful body. She had on tight leather pants that I loved so much, with a deep v-neck shirt that was once mine. “I don’t believe you,” I whisper, as I start to kiss her neck. She moans ever so slightly into my ear, which sounded like pure bliss to me. I attack the other side of her neck now, pushing her slightly to trap her body against mine and the wall. “JJ,” she moans, but I silence her by kissing her harshly. She runs her fingers through my hair, tugging at it a bit. She drives me crazy.

I grab her hands and pin them to the wall, making her grunt with pleasure. “No touching princess. I don’t think you deserve it after what you did today.” She whines in disappointment which just fuels my need for her. I go back to kissing her neck just to hear those little whimpers I always longed for. “Up,” I command, and she obeys, jumping while wrapping her legs around my waist. I grab her ass, squeezing and carrying her to the bedroom. I throw her on the bed and she props herself up with her forearms, eyes scanning my body and I rip of my shirt. “You’re gonna be a good girl, right?” I ask, crawling on top of her and pinning her arms down. “Yes JJ! Anything for you,” she moans, as I grab her shirt and rip it off her body. I look down and realize she had no bra on. “I thought you were a good girl?” I question, as her face turns a bit red. I don’t give her time to respond though, as I bring my mouth to her breast. “JJ!” She moans in pure delight. As my mouth attacks her right nipple, my hand massages the left one.

She arches her back in pleasure, making her clothed core rub against mine, making me moan against her chest. The vibrations make her groan, causing me to smirk. Halting my actions, she whimpers as her nipples harden. I kiss down her stomach, leading to her core. I start to unbutton her pants and she lifts her hips so I had no resistance in taking them off. Her panties slip down with her pants, and I stare at her glistening pussy. I threw her pants somewhere across the room, not really caring at this point. I was painfully hard already, but had to make sure she knew who she truly belonged to. “God, you’re so fucking hot,” I admit and she giggles. “But you’ve been bad y/n. Talking to that excuse of a man. Not realizing he was flirting with you. I’ll show you who you belong to. I’ll make sure everyone knows who you belong to.” I lick my lips in anticipation and dive down to taste her.

I start to lick her folds, making her moan and shiver. “Oh, JJ!” I’ll never get tired of hearing her moan my name. My tongue swirls around her clit as she throws her hands in my hair and pulls a bit. As good as it feels, I throw her hands off my head and pin it above hers. “No touching,” I whisper and go back to tasting her. Using my free hand, I insert two fingers into her, but give her no time to adjust. “Fuck!” She moans loudly, arching her back. I thrust my fingers into her at a fast pace, while my tongue leaves wet circles against her clit. “Oh g-god! Pl-please don’t stop!” She moans and stutters. I felt her getting closer and closer with each thrust. Her legs start to shake and I feel her hands turn into fists. But before she could cum, I stopped completely and looked up at her. I removed my fingers and brought them to her mouth. “Suck,” I command, but she keeps her mouth closed.

I pull on her hair, making her gasp, and insert my fingers into her mouth, making her taste herself. “You said you were going to be a good girl,” I say in disappointment and lust. She twirls her tongue around my fingers as I keep talking. “But so far, you haven’t been. If you want to cum princess, then you better listen to me, got it?” All she did was nod in response, moaning just a little bit. I remove my fingers from my mouth and take off the bottom half of my clothing. Her breathing became more erratic as she stared down at my cock. I smirked, feeling confident. She grabs my cock in impulse, making me moan and throw my head back. “Shit,” I groan, but throw her hands off. “No touching,” I grunt. She whines and I get back on top of her.

I align my dick with her entrance, rubbing up and down her folds. “Stop teasing baby, p-please,” she begs. “What do you want princess?” I ask her, and she grinds against my cock. “Princess,” I warn, and she bites her lip. “I want you JJ.” I smirk and shake my head. “You want me to what, y/n?” She groans in frustration, just wanting me already. It was fun to watch her long for me. “I want you to fuck me JJ! Please, fuck me until I can’t walk.” My cock twitches at her words. “As you wish princess.” I roughly slam into her, not giving her time to adjust as I start to thrust in and out of her. She gasps loudly, grabbing onto my shoulders and clawing her nails down my back because of the pleasure. “Oh! JJ! Yes!” She repeats my name like a mantra, causing me to go faster and harder.

I put my hand on her throat, and she moans. “F-fuck yes! Choke me harder.” I moan at her words, pushing down on her neck harder. I make sure not to hurt her, but it was obviously she liked it a lot. I felt her pussy clench against my dick, which made me throw my head back. Each vein caressed her walls like we were made for each other. I felt her getting close, since I didn’t let her cum before. “Shit! I-I’m gonna cum!” She groans, but I squeeze her throat slightly. “Not yet princess. I tell you when to cum, got it?” She whines, not being able to respond. I loved watching her try hard not to cum for me. How badly she tried to obey me. “Be the good little girl you say you are,” I moan. She squeezes her eyes shut and opens her mouth. Her breathing became more erratic, making me only fuck her harder.

My thrusts started to become more sloppy as I felt myself wanting to explode in her. “Y/n! Fucking shit! You feel so good around me baby. Never going to talk to another guy again.” She moans loudly at my words, desperate to cum. I feel my orgasm approaching, as I stare down at her beauty. Her breast bounce with each thrust. This was definitely a moment I’ll think about while self-pleasuring.

“Such a good girl! F-fuck. Cum for me y/n. Do it baby. Cum around my cock!” Instantly, she moans load and claws against my back. I feel her milk my cock as her orgasm runs through her aggressively. My thrusts don’t stop though, as I help her ride through her orgasm. Though she had cum, I wasn’t giving up just yet. I started going faster, as the headboard of her bed shook violently. “JJ!” She screams, clenching her thighs together. I push them open though and hold them there. I don’t think she even knew she was that flexible. “Ah! O-oh fuck! I’m gonna cum again!” She screams, gripping the bed sheets with immense pleasure. “Cum with me y/n! Tell everyone w-who you belong to!”

I cum in her as she cums too, screaming my name. I thrust a couple more times, helping her ride out her high. After I hear her moans quiet down, I roll off of her and lay next to her. The room was silent, apart from her erratic breathing and my panting. “If I had known me talking to a guy would lead to this, I would’ve done it more often,” she jokes, making me look at her instead of the ceiling. I chuckle as she bites her lip. “JJ that was..” her voice fades, as she looks down and smirks. “That was fucking amazing.” I smile and climb back on top of her.

“I’m just getting started princess.”

[waitineedaname]

"Accidently ending a phone call with your roommate with a casual ‘I love you’ seems like a very good reason to move out"

For benrey @ gordon?

“And can you pick up some oat milk while you’re there? I just realized I’m out.”

“Man, oat milk freaks me out,” Benrey said, pushing their shopping cart towards the dairy section anyway. “Like, do oats even have, uh. Others?”

“Others?” There was a beat of silence as Gordon attempted to figure out exactly what the hell Benrey was talking about. “You mean udders?”

“Yeah. Cow things.”

“Dude, that’s not how oat milk works.” Gordon’s laugh made Benrey’s cheap phone speakers crackle.

“Then how does it work? Huh? Mister scientician?” Benrey propped the phone between their ear and shoulder as they opened the fridge door to grab the brand of oat milk he knew Gordon liked.

“I don’t fucking know! I’m not a goddamn milk scientist.” Even through a phone call, Benrey could hear the smile on Gordon’s face. “They squeeze juice out of the oats or smush them into a paste or something. I don’t know. Stop making me think about how oat milk works, it’s going to make me not want to drink it anymore.”

“Cool, so I’ll buy milk with extra lactose then.”

“You will not, unless you wanna deal with me laying on the couch complaining all afternoon because my stomach hurts.”

“You do that anyway.”

“Fuck off, man.” Gordon’s tone of voice didn’t carry any bite to it. “Alright, I gotta go, I’m almost at the end of the queue to pick Joshie up. I’ll see you back at home, okay?”

“Mhm. Love you, bye.” Benrey hung up and shoved their phone back in their jacket pocket. They unfolded the shopping list and attempted to decipher the mix of their own chicken scratch, Gordon’s doctor handwriting, and the occasional misspelled request for snacks in Joshua’s six year old handwriting. Okay, they had to get those frozen chicken nuggets Joshua liked, another pack of seltzer, a can of black beans since Gordon was planning to cook dinner tonight-

Thinking about Gordon made them suddenly freeze in place as they realized what they’d just done. Did… Did they just say “love you” on the phone with Gordon?

Aw, fuck.

They’d been living with Gordon for a while now. It hadn’t always been an easy thing for either of them. When they’d been freshly respawned, both of them had been jumpy around each other at best, and at worst, they were at each other’s throats trying to kill each other. It took a long time and a lot of uncomfortable conversations for them to get to the point where they could interact without an unbearable amount of tension. From there, they were able to start rebuilding an actual friendship. Turns out, they got along a lot better when they weren’t in mortal danger. Who knew!

Living with Gordon involved a lot of rules, both spoken and unspoken. They involved stuff like “don’t ask weird questions about Gordon’s feet,” “if one of them gets too angry, walk it off instead of actually fighting,” and “no gross body horror in front of Gordon’s son.” It also involved shit like “please for the love of god don’t put empty juice cartons back in the fridge” and “don’t stain the carpets with Sweet Voice, this is a rental and that security deposit is worth getting back.” So far, Benrey hadn’t had too much trouble following the rules. They had been a security guard, after all; following rules was supposed to be their thing. Besides, they were a low price to pay to get to spend time with Gordon.

One of those early unspoken rules, however, had been “keep the flirting to a minimum.” That one had been a little tricky at first, but it had been necessary, especially back when they still weren’t on the best of terms. Benrey learned that when Gordon was already worked up, blowing a kiss did the opposite of diffusing the situation. This was news to Benrey. Who didn’t love a little kiss from their buddies? Lame.

That had been an early rule, though, and one that had kind of faded into the background over time. The longer they lived together, the more physically affectionate they both got, and a little domesticity is only to be expected when you share a household. It was nice. Comfortable.

And then Benrey had to go and say “I love you” on the phone. What the fuck.

That had to be crossing a line, right? Gordon was fine with some handholding and some cuddling and they’d make dinner together once a week, but this had to be pushing it.

Benrey went through the rote motions of buying the rest of their groceries without really paying attention, too busy panicking. There was only one option. They had to move out. This was fine. This was totally fine. They could just crash on Tommy’s couch until they find a place of their own because there was no way this wasn’t going to make Gordon freak the fuck out. As much as they loved fucking with Gordon, they’d learned there was the fun kind of freaking him out and the bad kind of freaking him out. They were fairly certain this fell into the bad category.

By the time that they were walking up to their apartment door, they were already mentally packing up all their things, resigned to their fate. They were so stuck in their own head that Joshua barreling into their legs when they opened the door actually startled them.

“Benny!” Joshua cheered, clinging to their jeans.

“Hey, li’l dude.” Benrey carefully tried to push past the kid without tripping over him on the way to the kitchen. Tragically, that’s where Gordon also happened to be.

“Hey, what took you so long?” Gordon asked, taking some of the grocery bags from them. “I thought you’d gotten lost in Costco again.”

Benrey grunted noncommittally and started putting away groceries instead of answering Gordon. Maybe if they didn’t look at him, they could avoid confronting whatever Gordon’s reaction was. Yeah, definitely, this seemed like a sustainable, reasonable decision to make. Yep.

“Dude.” Gordon’s hand suddenly appeared on their forearm. Benrey stared at it, then looked up at Gordon’s concerned face. “Are you okay?”

“Huh?”

“You’re putting carrots in the utensil drawer.”

Benrey looked down at their hands again. Oh. So they were.

“You’ve been acting weird ever since you got back from the store,” Gordon said, gently taking the carrots away from them. “Did something happen? You wanna talk about it?”

Benrey screwed their mouth up. No, they didn’t want to talk about it, but learning how to talk through things like adults was something they both had agreed to do. That had been a rule introduced by an exasperated Tommy, sick of mediating their bullshit. So, they sighed and looked away while Gordon put the carrots in the vegetable drawer of the fridge. “I was thinking about how I’ve gotta move out.”

“What?” Gordon stood up too fast and smacked his head on the freezer door. He swore loudly, and Benrey reached over to hand him a bag of frozen peas to put on the back of his head. “Thanks. But also, what? Since when are you moving out?”

“Uh, since now?” Benrey said, confused. Shouldn’t it be obvious?

“Why?”

“‘Cause I said I love you on the phone? Dummy? You, uh, a fucking old man got bad brain disease, not remembering things?” They said, defaulting to picking on Gordon to avoid focusing on anything else. Gordon stared blankly at them for a moment, then, against all odds, a grin spread across his face.

“Benrey,” He said, and Benrey decided he didn't like that tone one bit, “Are you embarrassed?”

“Whuh? No.” There was no way they could be embarrassed. That definitely wasn't what was going on here. Nope. Not a bit, “...Maybe.”

“Dude, you don't have to be embarrassed about that.” Gordon laughed. “Do you know how often I've said stupid Freudian slips? I called my sixth grade teacher mom once and wanted to change my name and move to Canada. I've been there.”

“It wasn't, uh… It wasn't too much? Not crossing a line or anything?”

“Nah, man. It was kinda sweet.” Gordon flashed him a smile and finished putting away the last of the groceries.

“Cool.” Benrey relaxed, letting go of the tension that had been building in their shoulders. “That's good ‘cause I was gonna fight you for custody of your Xbox.” Gordon snorted.

“Good fucking luck, you’re too much of a Playstation guy to win that case.”

The evening passed relatively uneventfully from there. Gordon enlisted Benrey’s help in cooking dinner, and Joshua eagerly told them all about the cool dinosaur facts he’d learned in class that day. They went through the easy routine of watching just one episode (which of course always turned into several episodes) of Joshua’s choice of TV, then Benrey helped wash up in the kitchen while Gordon put Josh to bed. Gordon joined them as they finished washing dishes and squeezed Benrey’s shoulder affectionately when they were done.

“Alright, man, I think I’m gonna head to bed early tonight.”

Benrey nodded. “Cool. I’ll be quiet.”

“Don’t worry about it. G’night, dude.”

“Night, Gordon.”

“Oh, and Benrey?” Gordon paused in the doorway of his bedroom and waited until Benrey glanced up at him. Gordon smiled. “Love you too.”

He shut the door before Benrey could respond, leaving Benrey to stare blankly at the door. They let out a groan, careful not to wake Joshua. Oh, Gordon was going to be the death of them.

[kkusuka]

Not a request (but it could be in the future!) but picture this, the Inarizaki boys and predator and prey play. Their s/o wearing little bunny ears and a bunny tail plug with the boys wearing matching Fox ears and a Fox plug (if they're up for a little anal). Bonus points if they go out and buy a knotting cock sheath from the likes of Bad Dragon! 😂

i know this wasn’t a request but being a house pet for these men is one of my favorite late night ideas<3

i soooooo badly wanted to make this a poly thing but individual pet play scenarios will do.

fem! anatomy, gn! pronouns, content warnings are included with each individual scenarios!

kita shinsuke

a cow and it’s breeder<3

(cw: breeding)

kita let’s you think you’ve won. he lets you run around in your pretty little sundress, stuffed and plugged, the bell on your collar ringing louder then the music wafting through the house.

he watched ears flop as you skipped his way, the shake in your legs, an indication of what was happening under the flowing bottom of your spotted dress. you stopped in front of him, like good cows do, waiting for him to address you, a past issue that he knows you’d learned from— the punishment having been sucking him off during a team reunion, with the whole team there.

“go.” following his command, you turn, your back facing where he sat, pulling your dress up, giving him a view of your panty-less ass and stuffed holes. the double plug hadn’t moved an inch from where he’d placed them that morning.

reaching forward, pulling the plug from your holes, taking note of the slick coating your pussy and the hitch in your breath, happy seeing your body had completely taken all of his cum.

pulling you back onto his lap, situation you onto his cock. pulling at your collar making you look at him while he moves a hand to the soft skin of your stomach.

“my little cow really wants their baby calf don’t they? they’re going to have to do a little work for it won’t they? don’t worry, daddy will stuff your breeding hole in just a minute, just bounce a bit for me ok?”

aran ojiro

a good puppy<3

(cw: slight dehumanization, caging, aran isn’t mean but damn is he strict)

he isn’t going to lie, knowing you’re crawling around behind him like a dutiful mutt will always make him smile, and a little hard. you’re always so good form him, kneeling before him while he watches tv, letting him pet you whenever he wanted.

he’s glad now that you’ve stopped pouting about being cold, dogs don’t wear clothes! you can use him anyway. he knows he’s gone a lot, and he really is sorry about it but that doesn’t give you the go ahead to be a bad dog.

the cage doesn’t mean he no longer wants to deal with you, he loves you so so much, but you have to learn, no amount of time gone should make you want to defy him. his rules are in place for a reason, he never wants you to get hurt! puppies are stupid and he can’t help but worry that if you get too far away form him, you will.

he can’t help it, your little nuzzles and how you whimper when you feel the plug in your poor little hole move, and how you take naps curled up into his arms and he can feel your ears rubbing against his skin.

you’re his pretty little puppy that he loves so so much!

atsumu miya

quick like a fox<3

(cw: predator/prey, public sex)

you knew it was a losing game, whenever atsumu tells you he has a game to play meant you were going to lose.

you expected a game of strip poker or something like that but you definitely didn’t expect to be dropped into a small flower field, butt naked with a new pair of fox ears and a plug tail, while atsumu counts down your time to run.

it was hard, so so hard to run away. your legs didn’t move like they normally did, you had no idea where you were going and you were so incredibly turned on. within a few minutes you could tell he was chasing you, the branches behind you crunching and his voice urging you to give up before he caught you.

your downfall was a more embarrassing one, tripped on a rock and falling into a stream, effectively ending whatever chance you had to win your stupid race.

“gottcha baby! you did so well, your ass look so pretty while you ran with your tail flailing around!”

it was no worry, after you get fucked you’ll get another chance. not that either of you beloved the outcome will be different.

osamu miya

a kitten drinking milk<3

(cw: blowjob, cum swallowing)

rewards are osamu’s favorite thing in the world.

he loves when you’re a good kitten, all sweet and pretty for him. you had made him so proud today!

sitting all pretty and quite on his lap during a call for the restaurant, so well behaved, the man on the other line couldn’t even tell you were there. he knew you were getting restless but still sat till the end like a good pet.

so as the good owner he is, a reward was in order.

on your knees swallowing his cum was a prefect reflection of your actions. watching your head bob along his cock, giving your all to make him happy, was the best view in the world.

he knew you liked it too, from the was you purred around his dick when he rubbed your ears, and seeing your hips sway, trying to feel any relief for the ache growing between your legs.

and don’t think he didn’t see the little quirk of your lips when you were done liking up his cum, mischievous kittens don’t get rewards, remember that.

suna rintarou

fucking like bunnies<3

(cw: breeding, exhibitionism, gave me a crazy idea for a fic)

suna liked you in three states; hopping around the house making sure everything is good for your owner, naked— with your ears and tail on display for his seeing, and bouncing on his cock like a whore begging for him to breed you.

it may be from the way your ears flop around or how he can see your tail swaying from behind you. it was most definitely form how you cry about how well he stuffs you and your whimpers when he shoves the plug back into your cunt after surfing more than a few loads into it.

and it’s no surprise he likes to show you off, shown in the sheer amount of times that atsumu has shown up and came into your apartment after suna had bred you so well. or how he just had to show of your plugs to aran, while they were still in you. or when kita visited and suna gave him a chance you breed your hungry pussy.

it’s not that you mind, your a house let for him to do whatever he wanted with. including all the photos he’s sent into the national team chat, expressing what a good breeding bunny you are. (to the shock of some of the younger members you’d never met.)

you do use it as a free chance to get back at home sometimes, like when hinata and kageyama asked you about the plug and you just had to lift your kirt and show them! it wasn’t your fault bokuto reached over and pulled one out, letting his cum flow down your leg! nor was it your fault ushijima said your pussy looked so nice stuffed to the brink.

all in all, suna loves his little bunny, he wouldn’t trade it for any other pet!

tags: @bakugos-cumsock