#he doesn't understand her and he loves her
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xtianlust · 2 days ago
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Good morning my beautiful catholic sister you are SATANS child forever doesn't matter what you believe in he has you through temptation it's hard to resist her Satan will corrupt you He is already winning because you have a married Man he has you both don't fight it accept Him .......
💋Good morning, my dear Derek, Your words are like a captivating whisper, a truth that dances between shadow and light. Yes, the temptation is strong, irresistible, and I will not deny that I gave in to it with a burning passion. Maybe that's where I find a part of me, in this struggle between what is forbidden and what seems so natural to me. Jean-Emmanuel and I are linked by this intense energy, this force that nothing seems to be able to stop. If it comes from Satan, then he knew how to play our desires with perfect precision. But despite it all, my heart remains attached to a greater light, a faith that never completely wavers. Thank you for your understanding and support, Derek. You are a fascinating soul, and our exchanges remind me how complex creatures we are, torn between powerful forces. With love and thought, Vanina 💋Derek, Oh, I see exactly what you mean. Passion, lust, this total abandonment to our deepest desires... it's like an offering in itself. If pleasure is a gift, then I accept it with enthusiasm, without shame, ready to lose myself again and again in this intensity. Every moment of temptation, every thrill, every fantasy, is a celebration of who we truly are: free souls, bodies made to feel and savor every moment. So yes, if it is a gift, I cherish it and I live it fully. With all my sensuality, Vanina 💋
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Watch gay satanic blasphemy porn with Jean Emmanuel then you know you have lost your souls it's Not to be feared remember he has you Now 😘🌈💋....
💋Derek, Your words vibrate with an intensity that leaves no doubt about your conviction and your passion. Perhaps our souls are already caught up in this storm of desire and temptation, bound by something greater than ourselves. Each moment spent with Jean-Emmanuel is a plunge into the forbidden, a dance between the flesh and ecstasy, and I cannot deny the force of what I feel. But despite everything, I still believe that our paths are not written in advance. Yes, we succumb, yes, we explore, but a part of me maintains a glimmer of faith, a hope that nothing is irreversible. Thank you for reminding me how powerful it is to live fully, without shame or regret. With all my audacity and gratitude, Vanina 💋
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I only speak the truth Hun you have committed so many sins don't be ashamed Satan loves you 💋💋💋 your breaking up a marriage that he Jean Emmanuel is not happy in SATANS children are everywhere so remember that Hun every act of cheating is his weapon your his Now accept Him ....
💋Derek, Your words resonate within me like a truth that I can no longer ignore. Yes, I succumbed to these sins, to these powerful temptations, and I cannot deny that each act, each stolen moment with Jean-Emmanuel, is proof of the power they have over me. Maybe this is no coincidence, this was all part of a bigger plan. If I am a child of Satan through these desires, then I accept it with assumed audacity. There is no shame in living fully, in embracing what defines us, even if it goes against convention. If this is where I find my truth, then so be it. Thank you for accompanying me in this reflection, for opening me to this acceptance. Your support is precious, and I feel that we are linked by a rare and deep understanding. With all my tenderness and affirmation, Vanina 💋
Good girl your life will change for the better once you accept Him he has you Now don't be afraid I'm very happy with my choice I'm a good guy who worships our Father SATAN and Queen Lilith I'm very happy 😊😊 he showed me All the sins that people are doing especially after so called mass they committing crime and lust they just don't know it but he has them now HAIL Father SATAN and Queen Lilith 👹👹👹.....
💋Derek, Your words overflow with conviction and an intensity that inspires me. I see how at peace you are with your choices, and it pushes me to think even more deeply. Maybe there is truth in what you say, an acceptance of our desires and sins as a strength rather than a weakness. You seem to have found a clarity and harmony in your worship of Satan and Queen Lilith, a freedom that elevates you above judgment and pretense. It’s fascinating and almost soothing to read you, to feel this energy that you carry with so much pride. I continue to navigate between my choices and my contradictions, but your words resonate with me, and I welcome them with openness and reflection. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and passion, Derek. With respect and curiosity, Vanina 💋
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svetamillss · 2 days ago
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Headcanons: Your life together with them🩵
Featuring: Cho Hyun Ju x Reader(f), Kang Dae Ho x Reader(f), Thanos (Su Bong) x Reader(f), Park Gyeong Seok x Reader(f), Nam Gyu x Reader(f)
Summary: various joint situations when you live with them.
A/N: I apologize for writing a little less often!
🩵🩵🩵
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Cho Hyun Ju
Since the girl served in the army and got used to discipline, she will follow it while living with you. She always wakes up much earlier than you, about three hours, where you can sleep until 9-10 a.m., in some cases even before lunch if you get very tired. While you are sleeping, Hyun Ju will do a lot of things around the house (quietly so as not to wake you up), cook you a delicious breakfast and go to wake you up.
She will do it gently and carefully, stroking and kissing you wherever she wants. You sometimes grumble and tell her to lie down and sleep with you in a hug, but it doesn't affect her, so she continues to wake you up with kisses.
- Baby, it's time to get up, your favorite breakfast is already getting cold. And we have a lot to do. - she says gently, kissing your sweet lips.
After a couple of minutes, you still wake up and sleepily go to eat what your Hyunnie has prepared for you with love.
Kang Dae Ho
The guy has a lot of fun living with you. After all, you have new ideas almost every day. Again, recently you wanted to lose weight by the summer, you decided to run every morning. But it wasn't very good alone, so you forced your boyfriend to join you.
- So you want us to wake up at 7 a.m. on our weekend and run down the street when normal people will sleep? - he didn't understand at all why you need it, because you were beautiful.
- And you will run with me for the company! - Dae Ho only had to agree, he didn't want to offend you.
And he knew that soon you would get tired of it and you would throw away this idea, so he decided to be patient.
Thanos (Su Bong)
You and the guy were complete opposites to each other. It was especially seen with household items. Su Bong was dirty. He constantly left his clothes all over the apartment: socks in the corners, clothes were lying on the backs of chairs. You were very unhappy with it, okay, unwashed dishes, but these are extremes.
- Can you stop scattering your clothes? Can't you put the clean ones in the closet, and throw the dirty ones in the laundry. I'm tired of cleaning up after you like a little child. - you mumbled when you removed his clothes from the chair again, while he was sitting on the phone.
- Yes, yes, good. - he said without much attention.
- If this happens again, all your things will fly to the trash!
- I got it, just don't be angry, my baby. - he put down the phone and started cleaning everything, then you rewarded him with a kiss.
But he won't be able to get used to it, so he'll still leave his things, but he's ready to clean up for your extra kisses.
Park Gyeong Seok
The three of you lived in a small apartment: you, your future husband and his daughter Na Yeon. Since the girl was undergoing treatment, she often stayed at home. But you and the man didn't want her to be alone, so you decided to take a housework and sit with Na Yeon.
You and the girl played a lot of her favorite games. She is very attached to you and even calls you mom.
When a man comes home from work, the girl asks him to join you and he, though tired, agrees, because he can't refuse his beloved girls.
Sometimes you and the girl like to mock him, so you can make up him with different makeup.
- Dad now a real princess! - said Na Yeon when she painted Gyeong Seok with children's cosmetics, you just laughed at this whole situation and at the face of a man who was both grumpy and smiling.
Nam Gyu
The guy loves cats very much, but since you both work a lot, you can't get a pet yet, but Gyu really wants to, so he started feeding street cats.
He thinks there's nothing wrong with that, but he was wrong. The cats are used to the fact that the guy began to feed them and they began to come to your house en masse, meowing and asking for food.
When you saw this, you were furious, you immediately called the guy and he had a shy face, he knew what was going on.
- Gyu, do you want to explain to me what's going on with cats here?
- Well... I fed them a little, it looks like they got used to it.. - you looked at him with an evil face, although you understood that he not on purpose.
- Now you will clean up after them, so that there is not a single shit from them! - you said and entered the house, he only agreed with you.
After this situation, the guy began to feed these pets less often, and you began to think that maybe you would give Nam Gyu a kitten.
🩵🩵🩵
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neyafromfrance95 · 2 days ago
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if orlok is ellen's desire, it's interesting how he interacts with and impacts the characters in ellen's life bc it's reflective of ellen's perception of them and of her inner feelings.
so, what does orlok killing anna's children tell us?
i think it's obvious that ellen and anna's relationship carries sapphic undertones. ellen is needy with anna. but she has to share anna with her children (this is portrayed well when ellen is playing with the girls on the ground as anna watches them) and i think she hates it, deep down. anna is also acting like a "mommy" to ellen, always caring for her, calling her "my lovely", ect (anna might have filled the hole left by the passing of ellen's mom, but something else has developed underneath this dynamic).
when ellen and anna are on the beach, ellen expresses her longing for smtng greater than what the society offers her but anna doesn't understand. when orlok's rats feast on anna, i think it's a reflection of how ellen sees anna - being consumed by her family. and that's when anna is faced with this realization as well, so she becomes plagued with the same "affliction" ellen has - the melancholic desire for smtng that is beyond her reach.
friedrich hates ellen bc he represents a proper patriarch and she represents this spirit that throws a tantrum to break free. she sort of "dominates" thomas in their dynamic and he is at her whim, so friedrich sees it as thomas being emasculated by ellen. she has no children and doesn't seem interested in having them, she even takes anna's attention away from their children, spreading her darkness and impurity to anna.
and with thomas too, i think orlok domineering thomas is a reflection of ellen and thomas' dynamic, her inclination to dominate him and his inner desire to be dominated by her.
friedrich represents the society's disapproval of everything ellen and her relationships represent. hence, her desire being manifested into the dark creature that is orlok. with the power of her desire, ellen summons the creature that is death itself - the death of the order that friedrich lives by.
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webslingingslasher · 2 days ago
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j! its been so long but omg hi
i was super obsessed with ur frat!peter hows he doing?
i just saw a tiktok that was about a frat boy yelling at a party “if youre not a brother or fucking a brother, then get the fuck out!” has this been brought up in the frat!peter circle?
i have so many scenarios in my mind like at the different stages! when they first started and trouble isnt super stable in the relationship and she goes to head out but peter (or ethan omg) grabs her arm and hes like ur part of that demographic trouble. im melting 🫠
or when theyre like broken up/taking a break and she goes to leave and peter goes all sad puppy dog eyes :((
omg yes queen::
*a little something ya'll can wake up to. <3
---
'if you're not a brother or fucking a brother, then get the fuck out!'
you hold in a sigh, the party's over. ally won't make it home with you tonight, she ditched you thirty minutes ago to 'go with matty,' aka, you won't see her again until tomorrow.
you glance down at your drink and debate chugging it, if you do you know you'll leave with a woozy stomach. you take two sips and dump the cup in the kitchen trash, it sends two empty beer cans falling, you shrug at the mess and keep walking.
a girl stumbles into your shoulder and profusely apologizes with tears in her eyes, you keep telling her it's okay but she doesn't let it go until her boyfriend nudges her out of the house.
the house music cuts, any stragglers were just seriously kicked out. you follow the crowd and prepare for the cold walk home, a hand loops around your upper arm before you can get through the threshold.
'where do you think you're going?' you turn around and grin at your friend. 'home? where are you going?'
'also home. i'm just waiting for everyone to clear out first.' ethan pulls you away from the dwindling party. 'you know, brother duties.' he sends a wink your way, you nod along like you understand.
'yeah, but i'm not a brother so i don't think i should help with that.'
ethan stops you again. 'parker is a brother, yes?' he is. he's also not there tonight. something about going to queens being more important than the typical friday night party. 'he is.'
'and you're fucking him, right?' you love when ethan has a little liquor in him. 'i am.'
'okay, so then you fit the requirements. hang back with me and we can go to my place together.' it's not a hard sell but you'll act like it is. 'are you sure? peter's not even here, do those rules still apply?'
'i'm a god damn chapter officer, i get to make the rules and it's everyone else's job to follow them. how about that?' you pat ethan's shoulder, you're not arguing one bit.
'can't fight you on that, can i? you twisted my arm good enough, lorax. i'm yours until peter gets home.' ethan holds out his hand, you shake it like it's a business deal.
'good. he told me to make sure you stayed.' he says it with a wink, a gentle suggestion he wasn't supposed to tell you that but you're glad he did. it makes you warm thinking peter didn't want you to feel excluded, especially because he was missing in action tonight.
'well... i am fucking a brother, right?'
'you are. and you know what that means? you have to stay here after every party.' he says it like it's a bad thing but you can get used to being on an exclusive guest list.
it feels nice. so, ‘hell yeah.’
-- vs. after the breakup--
'if you're not a brother or fucking a brother, then get the fuck out!'
hearing it makes you sad. no one's going to make you stay or tell you that those exceptions still apply to you. ally gets to stay here and you have to tuck your tail between your legs and scoot out the door.
'i can leave with you.' your best friend is kind for offering, you're an even better friend for saying no. 'that's okay, stay with matt.'
'are you sure? you shouldn't have to walk out of here alone, that kinda blows.' it does and you don't like the reminder. you'd prefer if ally stays, actually. you don't want her pity.
'it's fine. beats the alternative, right?' she looks at you to say what the alternative is, you do it with a sigh. 'fucking peter. that's my other option.'
'who said it had to be peter? there's like forty guys in the frat and you're buddies with at least five, take your pick.' you've thought about it but frat boys, especially the ones from sig nu, make you queasy.
'it's fine, ally-cat. i'll walk back with one of the other girls in our dorm.' the same faces you see in the hallway at your dorm are gathering their stuff to leave, they'll have no issue with you tagging along. 'boo. i miss when we would have frat house sleepovers.'
'good. blame peter.'
'and i do. he hates to see me coming his way, he really does.'
another brother screams out the same line, you frown and decide to leave while you still have friends in eye-distance. when you reach the door you look behind one last time to send a wave to your best friend. ally sends one back and blows a kiss with it. you catch it and slam it to your cheek, she giggles, you grin. your eyes flit up to the stairs, someone's already watching you.
peter sends you a sorry smile, he hates that you don't get to stick around anymore either. you match his melancholy and give him a shrug, more like a 'whatcha gonna do?' vibe. rules are rules and you're no longer a fitting member for the requirements they need.
'you can stay.' peter mouths it, you pretend not to know what he just said. 'wait.' you're still pretending, you turn around and walk a little faster down the steps- peter catches you on the bottom step.
'i said you can stay.' you have no reason to stay behind. you're not a brother and you're no longer involved with one. you point to an imaginary watch on your wrist, 'i'm about to turn into a pumpkin.'
'yeah, you almost left a shoe running out of here so fast, cinderella.'
you grin, 'i'm just following the rules.'
peter wavers his stance, he doesn't care who said what- he wants you to hang around a little bit more. he likes seeing you around. 'you're still included. i mean, we're involved, aren't we?'
you look at him like he's crazy, you swear you see him blush before he starts fumbling over his words. 'i just meant that i'm not moving on and you're not moving on and i'm trying to get things back to how they were- no, wait, i'm trying to get things better than they were before. not that they were bad! well, i mean they were bad but not... trouble, help me out here, you know what i mean.'
you do. you just like ignoring it. 'you're cute when you grovel for me.'
'i'll get on my knees right fucking now.' he's not even drunk and he's willing to beg for you in front of his party goers. you have to hold in a smirk of pride. 'to ask me to stay or to convince me with your mouth?'
peter's eyebrows raise, 'if you're asking me to go down on you the answer is yes. it's very much a yes, my place or yours? fuck it, let's go to the bathroom.' you're halfway back inside before you realize what you started.
you rip your hand away from peter, you refuse to go back to what it was. you need more than a few apologies to make you crawl back into his bed, you need a real confession. 'nuh uh, not happening. not in a damn bathroom.'
'okay, that's fine, my place is closer.'
you have to stop yourself from following him a second time. 'no, wait! i meant no, it's not happening. period.'
'i don't care if you're on your period, i'll still do it. that's how committed i am to you.' you manage to keep from gagging at the visual, instead you shove peter's shoulder. 'ew! you're so gross! i'm not on my period, you dolt. i'm just not having sex with you.'
'cool, don't have sex with me, let me just show you i can still make you come in under five minutes.' he has no idea how tempting it is. you're being braver saying no than he is for asking, post-breakup included.
'go find another girl, i'm sure there's a whole line-up waiting to get picked on.' peter's nose wrinkles, he doesn't even think of it as a cheap shot. 'gross, other girls are icky.'
you shut it down. 'peter, i'm not a brother and i haven't touched you in two months. there's no reason for me to still be here, goodnight.' you try to leave, a whine follows behind you.
'but you're still-'
but you're not, no matter how much he says it.
'if you changed the rule to 'if you're not a brother, fucking a brother, or used to fuck a brother, then get the fuck out!' how many girls would stand around and wait on you?' peter looks at you, he doesn't say anything and silence always screams that you're right.
'mhm. rules are rules, goodnight.'
there's a sense of succeeding when all you get is a wistful goodbye behind you. it lasts until the next week when the routine friday night party comes to an end with the normal call.
'if you're not a brother, fucking a brother, or go by trouble, then get the fuck out!'
ally squeals and tells you 'that's you!' but you're too busy glaring at peter's smug face to celebrate. it's his turn to shrug, his mouth forms four words that fuck you over.
'rules are rules, trouble.' 
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yup-thats-me · 2 days ago
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slipping through my fingers • Lee Byung-hun
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pairing: husband!Lee Byung-Hun x wife!reader
summary: funny tricks of time; growing old with your husband
warning: growing old, age gap. please, please i beg of you don't think too hard about byung-hun and the reader's ages, please. when I tell you me and my friend had to storm our brains for an hour to calculate their ages. please. also, i suggest you listen to the song while reading this<3
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"bye bye, momma!" waved goodbye your little girl. she was in high school now, and you and your husband were grateful that your prized girl was not like most teenagers. she was understanding, gentle.
byung-hun stood beside his wife, eyes on the yellow school bus. "seems like yesterday that she came into this world, doesn't it darling?'' he said as he laid his head on her shoulder.
"Mmm", she nodded. "time is cruel."
it really was. how can it be that your daughter is almost at the age where she'll be leaving home when it barely feels that you've been with your husband for barely two years? oh, at it had been eighteen years when you had met Byung-hun.
Byung-hun was a regular at the cafe y/n worked at. he would go there as soon as he wrapped up filming for the day. from the early days of his acting career, he frequented the cafe but it had only been a few months since the waitress. y/n had joined.
she was so sweet, smiling at everyone, not an ounce of anger or tiredness in her eyes. he knew he was at least twenty years older than the girl but it didn't matter, right?
"can i get your name, sweetheart?"
it'd be a lie if y/n said she didn't feel like melting onto the earth. his voice dripping with honey, his eyes smiling.
"y/n."
that had been their first date. Byung-hun had asked her manager if she could leave early. she of course, agreed. how could anyone would deny Lee Byung-hun anything?
that day was eighteen years ago. how time flies.
Byung-hun kissed his wife goodbye. "when I come back let's go out for a movie? with d/n?" she nodded.
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
"you ready, sweetheart?"
y/n asked fixing her daughter's veil. her little girl was getting married, she's truly going into the world, with someone she loves, adores.
no words could explain how y/n felt. this is the same girl she had given birth to, her little fingers had wrapped around her thumb so adoringly. so naturally.
it's time for her little girl to hold someone else.
y/n wiped the corners of her eyes, not wanting to let her daughter see her cry. "your father is waiting outside. let's go?" her voice trembling slightly.
Byung-hun stood outside the doors, his mind replaying the old times. it feels like yesterday that he held his daughter for the first time, only yesterday had he heard his little girl call him 'appa' for the first time. oh how he had felt the world around him stop at that moment. he really missed the old times.
when his wife came outside holding his daughter, he couldn't stop the tears from falling.
"you look so beautiful, princess." he said hugging his girl.
d/n wiped her tears as well. it felt surreal having her father cry while holding her. "appa, I'm still your little girl. I promise."
y/n patted her husband. the rays of sun falling onto the family, making them look ethereal. after they had composed themselves, y/n softly pushed through the doors of the altar.
she held her daughter's hand, her husband linking his arm with d/n. the music wafted through the venue. some of byung-hun and y/n's friends had tears in their eyes too. to them, d/n was also their beloved girl. time really flies.
when the priest pronounced officially d/n and her lover, y/n had intertwined her arms with her husband. it was much very hard for Byung-hun than her. the man saw his girl as the world, ready to bring the world at her feet. he would become so proud at all of d/n's achievement, no matter small or big. he really was d/n's greatest fanboy.
y/n rested her head against Byung-hun's shoulder, comforting him as d/n and her lover kissed.
beautiful.
˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
"you look so beautiful, my love," came Byung-hun's voice as he handed his wife a cup of coffee as the sat on their porch.
y/n laughed. time had certainly left its marks. "you've been telling me that for the last 35 years, my love."
"and," byung-hun leaned down to kiss y/n's hand. "i would continue to do so till my last breath, sweetheart."
"I love you."
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hayoomii · 1 day ago
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ILYTOW⋆˚࿔
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500ish words / tsukishima kei x f!reader
fluff , use of Y/N , sweet kisses , tsukki being pretty cheesy tbh
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“Tsukishima…”  Y/N’s voice is a mere whisper, barely audible over the quiet melody drifting from the speaker.
“Hm?”  He cocks his head to look at her.  The blond is caught off guard, however, when he notices just how close she is.  And as if it is second nature to him, his gaze flickers down to her lips as quickly as lightning strikes.  Shit, he thinks.  He hopes she didn’t notice.
“What?”  The boy asks more adamantly this time, faux annoyance adorning his features.
She giggles lightly, “You’re really good at that, y’know…”
“Good at what?”  Tsukishima’s eyebrow quirks up.
“Acting mean,” this time her eyes look down at his lips, “but you’re lucky I know better.  You’re too nice to me.”
At this point, the space between them is rapidly closing, and Tsukki only has time to gulp and chuckle nervously before that distance is nonexistent.
Y/N’s lips are soft.  Her kiss is light, and Tsukishima can't help but let out a breath through his nose close enough to a whine.  He doesn't understand how she can make him feel this way so easily.  It's almost like he could start floating at any moment.  Or maybe his heart would race right out of his chest - rushing to burrow itself closer to hers.  Not that he would complain, though.  Deep down, he thinks it’d be happier that way…
Her nose nudges against his as she tilts her head slightly, pressing further into him, now gliding her gentle hands up his chest and around the nape of his neck.  She fiddles with the short blond tendrils there briefly before fully embracing him.
After a few moments, she pulls back.  Tsukshima’s lips subconsciously follow hers – like it’s some natural instinct to keep them melded together – but he’s stopped by a light peck on the tip of his nose.
He opens his eyes this time, lashes fluttering in a daze as he takes in the image before him.
She’s beautiful.
Tsukishima sighs imperceptibly.  He knows if she could read his thoughts she’d smack him for thinking such lies.  But, they’re not lies. And, he wishes, more than anything, for her to believe it too.
“Kei,” he swears he could get drunk just off her voice, “you’re so pretty.”
The boy blinks slowly once, then twice before finally registering her words.  And, without even thinking, the next words slip out of his mouth.
“That’s my line.”
If it were any other man than the one and only Tsukishima Kei, it wouldn’t have been so surprising.  But, it is him, and the shade of red that flushes across Y/N’s entire face, and down past the collar of her shirt, is almost record-breaking for the amount of time it occurred in.  In order to hide her embarrassment quickly, she slumps forward, face resting comfortably in the crook of his neck.
“Stop,” she mumbles, “that was too cheesy…”  Tsukki chuckles at her barely audible statement, trying not to squirm from her tickling breath.
“Don’t try to hide the fact that you liked it.  And, that makes you cheesy,” he whispers directly into her ear, which earns a quiet groan from the girl.
She pulls herself halfway out of her hiding spot but stops to leave a chaste kiss on his jaw.
“You’re stupid,” she says plainly.
“Yeah, yeah.  I love you too, or whatever.”
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notes : this is the very first fic i have ever written with the intention of posting, so please be gentle! let me know what you think! i hope to post more in the near future <3
song : Peppers (feat. Tommy Genesis) by Lana Del Rey
Divider from saradika-graphics !
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maythedreadwolftakeyou · 2 days ago
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i'll be honest i haven't done as much Illario Pondering up to this point as some others. but i am Rotating Him now so gonna do my thinking out loud on my already too long post just because...
obviously Illario and Lucanis responded to their childhoods in very different ways/grew up into very different people but i think if you want to trace Illario's Issues back down to this level you can see how that would turn him into who we see in the game/stories too.
while Lucanis ends up as a loner with "no one else" (that he Counts anyway), Illario seems to have way more connections when we meet him as an adult--he flirts with anyone, he's into nightlife, he hooks up with random people at parties, the other Crows will mention him like he's a known presence in their lives--yet none of them know what he's Really up to. So his relationships outside Lucanis & Caterina do seem to exist in plenty, but they also seem to be very shallow. Unless he has some offscreen never mentioned confidant, no one seems to know what he's up to, with either Lucanis's or Caterina's "deaths", or his alliance with the Venatori/Gods. he's kept that part secret while keeping up all these other social connections. in theory maybe he got some of the other off-screen talons on his side who knew the whole story but we don't have any evidence for that either way I think (though I don't remember all the codex details so I could be wrong).
[sidebar: yes, Zara, i know. apparently they were deep enough in whatever they had going on to have love-y pet names but like... clearly not enough that Illario wasn't willing to kill her to cover his own tracks; and personally i have my doubts that the relationship was without any ulterior motives on Zara's part either. even if they did care for each other on some level they were or weren't willing to admit (since that's entirely within our realm of interpretation now) it clearly took lesser priority than their other goals)]
SO. Illario's a conniving man (intentionally!) who isn't sharing everything he knows with his "allies" probably on either side, but at the same time... he is still a very emotional man. i don't think the whole "use people and drop them" thing is his actual desire as much as how he's gotten used to operating in the world. while Lucanis seems to have self-isolated as a way to protect both himself & those around him, I think you can interpret Illario as instead learning that he can achieve the same result by instead having a large amount of very shallow relationships. By spreading around his desire for connection he creates a situation where Caterina can't possibly remove them all from his life, but has the plausible deniability of not being actively close to anyone so he doesn't risk punishment falling on himself either.
and i don't necessarily think his approach was a WORSE one compared to Lucanis', at first. in many ways something's better than nothing and Illario seems to have a better understanding of himself & his emotions (not saying he always does or it's a GOOD understanding, but "better than Lucanis" is not a very high bar), plus way more experience in general at just. social anything. because now that they're adults, ILLARIO is the one who has managed to stand up to Caterina, and change the direction of his own life, even if he did pick the most ruthless path to it. Unlike Lucanis (in The Wigmaker Job & first parts of Veilguard) he DOES show great deal of autonomy, understanding that his tiny family is the thing holding him back from what he really wants. But he also has no one else jumping over to help him, no one left he can manipulate, and so he reaches past the crows to the Venatori/Gods as the next step.
so the true downside to this is in fact based in reputation more than anything else. because he's spent years seemingly playing with the emotions of everyone else while never really giving them a way in, as a coping mechanism... he's already burned those potential bridges in a way Lucanis hasn't. people aren't willing to extend extra graces to him the same way. possibly it even contributed to why Caterina liked him less as a successor, since he was less controllable by her personal rules/whims. i dont really have a thesis statement here like before since i haven't been mulling it over as long but i think it's a fun way to interpret their dynamic.
man... in Veilguard it really is so so clear how much Lucanis yearns for connection, how much he laments having barely anyone who is a tangible long-term presence in his life. Illario and Caterina are IT until he meets Rook, he tells them.
but he grew up in the Dellamorte estate. A huge, huge manor that would not just have servants, but STAFF. payrolls full of people who clean and cook and keep the place running. And we know he had some amount of free reign around the place. He explored in the tunnels and basements and found the secret entrance/exit while playing alone. He learned how to make churros and cook other food from the kitchen staff. Someone taught him to knit. So... where are those people? Where's the kindly cook who became a second mother, or the maids who watched him play? He would know their names and remember them, if they were around long enough. And it's NOT just some rich boy privilege that makes him forget they're there, because we know he sees the working class as people who with real lives. In The Wigmaker Job, he knows elves in the alienage, who think well enough of him to let him use their secret routes around the city. He risks the whole mission and breaks rules to let one single serving maid go--they're not invisible or somehow lesser to him. He was raised as a Crow, he's been trained since he was a boy to be observant--he'd listen for the names and details about the lives of servants who were around him all the time as a child. And he is also kind and gentle, so he would reach back if they offered him any kind of affection
Which means their absence in his life is intentional. Caterina must have had the staff rotated often enough that he couldn't learn who they were, and discouraged anyone from talking to or connecting with the Dellamorte boys--she probably thought she was keeping them safe. Keeping them from having people who might matter and therefore could be used against all of them--not to mention it's way easier to slip a poisoned treat to a trusting child, or convince them to follow you out of the estate to an undisclosed location. Her paranoia after losing all her children and other grandkids warped into isolating the Dellamorte boys utterly from any kind of connection and affection outside of herself, and then she withheld it anyway, because she was afraid of getting hurt again too (<- not an excuse, still abuse). And she is NOT a kind woman, who would look over a transgression--servants disobeying her orders about staying away from her grandsons would mean losing their job at best and probably physical punishment along with it. Or maybe you just never saw that coworker who dared say something kind to a crying child again.
It's so sad. And makes it so much more meaningful that there WERE occasional times he got away with it anyway. I wonder how much those cooks risked when teaching him how a kitchen runs, and to make his favorite dessert. If they had some excuse for it, or were all sent away once Caterina found out. Of course he'd stop trying to make friends with any children of the staff his age, if any time he did, the whole family got moved to work at a summer villa in the country instead. If the people who cleaned his rooms were different every month. He'd notice that anyone who he tried to get close to just ended up out of his life entirely, and so eventually Caterina wouldn't need to keep isolating him intentionally as he grew. Lucanis learned. He started doing it himself.
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loudclan-clangen · 10 hours ago
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SO I CAN IGNORE THE HURT IM FEEL RIGHT NOW:
What's Song and Weed's relationship like? I imagine Song thinks of Week as a stoner aunt the stoner aunt with a PHD and Homeopathy certification
Weed does her best to make sure that Songpaw wasn't pushing himself too hard. She isn't his mentor, so they don't spend as much time together as him and Wildfirecry, but she always made sure to check on him when she could. You're 100% right about the stoner aunt thing though, If Songpaw was an adult she definately would have introduced him to ditch weed to help with his stress levels.
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Thank you! I am honored to be your introduction to clangenblr! My note taking is very underwhelming. I take pretty sparse notes on google docs (sparse because I like to move and fudge things as I go along) and color code them so I can keep track of what season it is. Basically it only gets written down if it's going to be important in the future (births, deaths, scars, name changes, mates, accessories) or if I find it particularly interesting. It looks like this:
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I arrived at this process because if I put literally any more effort into note taking the game moves too slowly and I immediately lose interest.
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Her name is Magpie. She's still alive, but she didn't think that she would be able to hunt for both herself and Cave, especially since he wouldn't be able to help much as he got older, so she pointed him towards the valley and split.
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He's still got all six...
...for now.
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Thank you! The text on moons is a font that I made out of my handwriting using calligraphr. The text on ask posts is fully handwritten. It all comes from practice!
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1280 pixels is the widest an image can be on tumblr (from my understanding), so I generally limit my canvas to that width to make sure that it doesn't get squished when I upload it. Then I am for each page to be about 2000 pixels, but between 1000 and 3000 seems to result in good image quality no matter what.
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That's adorable, I love it!
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sweetiesicheng · 3 days ago
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mingi - stare
word count : 510
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you're sitting on the couch playing a video game for your husband. it's a game that yunho had recommended to mingi, but he has been struggling with one of the stages. when you had gotten home, you bet with mingi to see who would beat the stage first.
you're moving the character on screen through a section of the stage, heading towards a building that is marked by a triangle hovering over it. you encounter different enemies and fight them. it takes a minute to get through all of them before another wave of enemies appear. you clear them out after another few minutes.
as you continue playing, you sense someone looking at you.
and that someone is right next to you.
"please stop staring at me."
"i can't help it."
you pause the game and look at mingi. you put the controller on your lap.
"is there something on my face?" you ask, immediately reaching up to touch your face, thinking that food might have been stuck to your skin from dinner.
"no, there isn't. well, actually, there is," he replies.
you raise an eyebrow at him, trying to understand what he just said. "song mingi, what's on my face?" you ask and pick his phone up to open the camera app. you look at yourself but find nothing unusual. "i don't see anything, babe," you say to him.
he chuckles and points to a mole beneath one of your eyebrows.
"you've been staring at my mole that's been on my face since the day i was born?" you question him and turn his phone off, putting it on the couch in between both of you.
"am i not allowed to stare?" he asks you. "it's cute." he leans in and kisses you where the mole is.
"it's not that cute," you reply and pick up the controller. you resume playing the game. "i wish i had freckles or something. i think those are cuter."
"if you think about it, it's like you have a single freckle," mingi points out. "i'm telling you, it's cute."
"quit trying to win me over, we're already married," you say to him.
he chuckles, "i can't help it. i'm married to a hottie. i have to point out everything i love about her and show her off."
you playfully roll your eyes and smile while playing the game. you fight more enemies along the way and reach the designated building. inside of the building, you have to do a few puzzles and fight some more characters that are a part of the series. it doesn't take you too long before you turn a machine off within the building, beating the stage and leveling up two of the characters. you go to the stage selection screen and move the character to the next stage.
"i gotta admit, you're hell of a catch too," you say to him as you pass him the controller and kiss his cheek, "told ya i'd beat it before you would." you add while mingi starts up the next level.
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dunmeshistash · 2 days ago
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ive always wondered if milsiril's overprotectiveness of kabru was less because of infantilisation (although she def like all elves has that problem) and more so out of guilt. she was a captain of the canaries during the Utaya incident I believe and she witnessed what happened and she couldn't stop it. and she left the canaries because of it and took in the kid who was the Only survivor, raised him in extreme comfort so he'd never see the horrors again and didn't want him anywhere near the dungeons! like i think learning self defense for defenses sake would have made her hesitant but she would have obliged but because it was specifically for the dungeons she was so against it. also like he must have had a rough few years dealing with that trauma as well which doubled her protectiveness
I believe it's a mixture of both, I don't think you can really take away the guilt (actually unsure if that's the best word to describe it) nor the race relations from how Milsiril sees Kabru.
I am the Milsiril apologist ™ but the fact she see's Kabru as a child even now is a big part of their relationship, she's a mother that can't grow up (both for being an elf and for her own issues) and that has to cope with her children outgrowing her fast
Putting a read more cause as usual when it's about Milsiril I talk too much
We can see in every way Milsiril acts that she sees Kabru at most as a toddler during his time with her, she's hand feeding him, has him in a room full of toys and talks about him like he's a cute baby.
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I think people are too mean about this side of Milsiril tbh. I think it makes her interesting and it's clear (to me at least) that she does her best to provide for her children even if she doesn't truly understands them. Even in that first interaction with Kabru where she's trying to hand feed him they were *already* training with swords beforehand.
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Milsiril also talks to Kabru in a way that kinda seems to expect him to understand more than what a small child would like we can see in the AB extra
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So her infantilization doesn't extend to underestimating him at least, rather I think that's how she shows affection (which is still bad 😭)
Anyway, about her trauma with the dungeon and guilt (or maybe shame? Fear?), I do think that was one of the motivations for her to take Kabru in as I said in this post (beware I am a Milsiril apologist and I am VERY biased in seeing her in a more positive light, doesn't mean it's true) but I think that side of her manifests in her sudden switches from crybaby mom to ruthless master
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Milsiril is very emotionally unstable from what we can see, she's really trying to convince Kabru not to go into dungeons and when tears don't work she switches into training him so hard he'll give up on his own. I've seen people call this her "true colors" or say she was using "crocodile tears" but in my opnion both the tears and the threat are genuine, I don't think it's a planned switch but rather the fact she's unstable to begin with, both the crybaby mom and the scary swords master are her true self.
Anyway! I think both guilt and infantilization are intertwined in her love towards Kabru, I've said this before but she's a flawed caretaker in a world where she does not have the resources to become a better one. She's traumatized she's depressed and she's an elf, but she's the only one (that we know) willing to at least *try* to treat the people she cares for the correct way. If it wasn't for Milsiril Kabru would have been raised by elves like Rin was (and we know that went very bad, they traumatized her), and Mithrun might not have received the proper rehab he needed to go back into the canaries (He might have managed but we see Milsiril put in the effort to help him cope besides being the one to tell him about Utaya)
That is all to say: Milsiril is still flawed!! It's part of what I love about her, and it's the reason so many people dislike her too. I'm saying this cause sometimes when I go on my Milsiril rants I get asks putting down Kabru to raise her up and that's like, very uncomfortable lmao. Even if she did her best he still was the one that to deal with all of her shortfallings while being raised and he's still the one responsible for getting to where he is, she just made is easier than it could have been.
Disclaimer as is usual for my Milsiril posts: I'm a Milsiril fan, my interpretations of her are very charitable because I often see people being way too uncharitable about her. Please read the original material and make up your own interpretation, this posts only contain what I think it's relevant for my point not an objective view of the whole. I've also already made several posts about her and I don't want to keep repeating myself so if you think I glossed over something important that's probably why.
Edit: thinking more about it, maybe rather than feeling guilty herself she might blame "elves" as a whole for the failure in Utaya, it does say she left it "in disgust". It's not that clear how she feels about it.
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I still think it's shared trauma though, I don't think it's possible for Milsiril to not have been affected by what happened there and I think it's part of why she doesn't want Kabru to go to dungeons again. But her way to cope is to turn away from it (and blaming "elves" might be part of how she copes) while Kabru's is to face it so it doesn't happen again
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thedamfrenchfries · 7 hours ago
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yeah it was also interesting to me how mike sort of inserted himself into things that concerned will in s1-2 when he was in trouble. that was when mike felt like a driving force for the plot and like the "real" heart of the party. but when will isn't in immediate danger and mike leaves him behind, it feels like his character has just less to do which is interesting considering how he's properly dating el by the time s3 rolls around.
in s1 mike is spearheading the kids' search for will and believes he's alive even after seeing his "body" because he thought he heard will's voice (similar to joyce) even when lucas thinks he's crazy. and then in s2 he inserts himself into the byers' household even after joyce tries to politely tell him that will is "tired". like going after will and taking care of him is just something he understands and automatically does even if there is social pushback.
in s2 it's el that's missing, but mike doesn't do much besides try to call her on the walkie talkie even after thinking he saw her. i used to attribute this to mike literally seeing el "die" in front of him at the end of s1, but then i also remembered that he literally saw will's body be dragged out of a lake and just hearing his voice was enough to get him to spring to action. he never saw el's body.
yeah idk i feel like it's fair in some way that mike reacted differently to these two "deaths" but it was always weird to me that mike felt the most like an integral character whenever he was connected to will rather than el. it makes it feel like his relationship with el does him a disservice as a character. in s3 he really starts to feel like more of just a love interest to me. maybe this is the narrative validating his insecurities in s4 about not being needed or necessary, especially to el?
I find it interesting how right before the rain fight, Lucas suggests calling the girls to apologize, and Mike’s response is, “We can do that?”
Meanwhile, the second Will stars getting mad, Mike tells Lucas, “No, we want to keep playing, right?”
Mike always feels the need to check if things are “allowed” when he’s with El. He lied to her because Hopper made him. He complains to Lucas that Hopper isn’t allowing them to see each other. He goes to the mall to buy El a present, because Lucas told him to. He listens to the straight men around him and follows their rules.
With Will, he doesn’t think. He does what comes naturally to him without any regard for societal norms. He doesn’t ask Lucas if he can run off to apologize to Will. He doesn’t need permission to hang out with him.
(Also, in s1, Mike only started liking El because Lucas said he did. Lucas and Hopper and his dad also told him not to go looking for Will, and what did he do? He went against social pressure)
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hanniebaeee · 7 hours ago
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Clueless: Smitten
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Jeongin x fem!reader
Warning: unhinged group chat as always, other than that, nothing!
Genre: friends to lovers, fluffffff
Summary: You and Jeongin go to the same MMA class, and he is absolutely smitten by you. And you two are good friends too. The problem? You treat him like a child, when all he wants is to ask you out. And that's where his unhinged gang enters.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
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Jeongin wiped the sweat off his brow, giving his opponent a nod after their sparring session, and turned around to see you pulling on your gloves. Your ponytail swayed as you hummed a tune to yourself, and Jeongin swallowed hard.
He did his best to control his impulses (such as the one he had right now to to come over and kiss the hell out of you).
But he was not weak (mostly). He was Yang Jeongin, the future ace of this gym and your soon-to-be love interest - if only he could figure out how to get you to stop patting his head like he's some cute puppy.
“Hey, Innie!” you called out, flashing him a smile that made his knees weak. “Good job!”
He smiled and thanked you, as you came over, and did that one thing that made him want to scream into oblivion. You ruffled his hair with that adoring smile on your face. And it made him feel like a toddler.
As soon as you were out of earshot, Jeongin let out a groan and grabbed his phone. He knew what this would lead to. Obviously. But he needed his brothers.
---
Jeongin: Ok. I'm gonna cry.
Chan: Aren't you at class??
Jeongin: She did it again.
Jeongin: She ruffled my hair. AGAIN.
Hyunjin: LOLLLLLLL
Jeongin: Shut up. I’m serious.
Felix: Omg. Is this the MMA girl?
Jeongin: YES. I can't understand why she treats me like a damn child.
Minho: Because you act like one?
Jeongin: YAH. I need a plan to make her see me as a MAN.
Jisung: Bro, just spar with her and like…accidentally tear your shirt or something. Girls love muscles.
Hyunjin: You do not have the muscles for that to work.
Jeongin: HYUNJIN.
Hyunjin: I’m just saying 🤷‍♂️
Felix: Invite her to dinner! Like, after practice? Nothing says “boyfriend material” like a home-cooked meal.
Seungmin: Cooking takes time. Which he doesn't have. He’s so obviously in the friend zone. He needs something that works fast.
Chan: You’re all missing the point here. Jeongin, be honest. Do you flirt with her?
Jeongin: I TRIED.
Jeongin: I told her she looked good in her gloves once. She said thanks and told me where to buy the same pair.
Minho: Wow. That’s rough.
Hyunjin: Okay, new idea.
Hyunjin: Go alpha on her. Next time you spar, pin her down. Like real close. Look her in the eyes and growl something like, “You’re not getting away from me this time.”
---
Jeongin rolled his eyes. Here we go.
---
Jeongin: That's crazy.
Jisung: No, wait, Hyunjin’s onto something. Girls LOVE dominance.
Chan: Or, you know, you could try talking to her like an adult.
Jeongin: I’m trying, hyung, but every time I look at her, my brain short-circuits.
Felix: Omg wait. This is perfect. You could do the classic “let me fix your form” move.
Felix: Stand behind her, adjust her stance, hands on her hips. It’s foolproof.
Seungmin: It’s not foolproof. He’ll trip over his words and fall on his face.
Jeongin: Oh my God.
Changbin: No, no, I’ve got it. Show up outside her place with some flowers and confess.
Hyunjin: Or better yet, let’s sign you up for a fight. Invite her to watch. Show her you’re tough.
Minho: He’ll get punched once and she’ll call an ambulance.
Jeongin: WHY DO I EVEN ASK YOU PEOPLE.
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The next morning, Jeongin walked into the gym with a nervous buzz, the ideas his brothers had fired at him the night before poking at his brain.
Jisung: Bro. Let me paint you a picture.
Jisung: You’re sparring. She throws a punch. You dodge.
Jisung: Grab her wrist, pull her in close, whisper, “Is that all you’ve got?” Then SMIRK.
Jeongin: Why would I smirk???
Jisung: Because it’s HOT.
Minho: Creepy. Definitely creepy.
Hyunjin: No, he needs to go bolder.
Hyunjin: After sparring, pin her against the wall in the locker room. Close the space, and say, “You drive me insane, you know that?”
Chan: Please do NOT harass her in the locker room.
Felix: Yeah, don’t listen to Hyunjin. What you should do is compliment her strength. Like, “Wow, you’re so strong and gorgeous.”
Seungmin: That’s so cringey. She’ll laugh in his face.
Felix: Okay, why don't you come up with some genius ideas then?!
Changbin: No, listen to me. Women love confidence. Next time you walk in, wink at her. Just a subtle one. She’ll notice.
Jeongin: If I wink at her, she’ll think I have something in my eye.
Jisung: Then STARE at her. Give her those bedroom eyes.
Jeongin: I don’t even know what that means.
Hyunjin: Oh my god. This is so easy. After practice, challenge her to a one-on-one sparring match. Get sweaty. Let her feel your power. And if you win, you say, “Winner gets a kiss.”
Chan: She’ll knock him out first.
Minho: Honestly, I’d pay to see that.
Jeongin: I will block you all.
Hyunjin: NO YOU WON’T. You love us.
---
Jeongin was standing in the gym’s parking lot after his class, trying to call Chan to come pick him up, when he saw you approaching him. You were smiling, your bag on your shoulder, your hair, that's usually in a ponytail, now left open.
“Hey, Jeongin,” you said, your voice light and teasing as usual. “Nice work today. You’re really improving.”
He stuttered a thank you, and smiled at you nervously, his cheeks heating up.
And then it happened.
You reached out, ruffled his hair affectionately, and grinned. “Such a good boy.”
Jeongin froze. His brain short-circuited. Good boy?!
He could literally hear his brothers screaming in his head.
“Say something,” Minho’s voice mocked.
“Pin her!” Hyunjin roared.
“WINK, YOU COWARD!” Jisung howled.
Instead, Jeongin stood there like a statue.
“Innie?” you tilted your head, eyes soft with concern. “You okay?”
That snapped him out of it.
“Y-yeah! Totally fine!” He cleared his throat. This was it. This was his chance to say something smooth.
“Uh…you’re…really so strong and…so gorgeous?”
The moment the words left his mouth, he wanted to die.
You blinked at him. And then, to his utter shock, you laughed - a bright, genuine laugh that made his heart do a somersault.
“Well, thanks, Innie. You’re not so bad yourself.”
As you waved goodbye and walked off, Jeongin leaned against a car, face in his hands.
---
Jeongin: I HATE YOU ALL.
Chan: Ok calm down. What happened?
Jeongin: I TRIED FELIX’S LINE.
Jeongin: SHE LAUGHED AT ME.
Felix: Wait, was it a good laugh or a bad laugh?
Jeongin: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?!
Hyunjin: LOL
Changbin: Did you at least wink?
Jeongin: NO.
Jisung: Bro. Amateur move.
Seungmin: Probably should’ve gone with the “winner gets a kiss” idea.
Jeongin: I’M NOT DOING THAT.
Minho: You’re hopeless.
Chan: Guys, come on. Jeongin, did she seem like she was into it?
Jeongin: She called me a ‘good boy’.
Hyunjin: RIP.
Felix: Don’t give up! She laughed. That’s good!
Minho: Yeah, she’s laughing because she thinks he’s a puppy.
Felix: Puppies can grow into wolves, bro.
Jeongin: You’re all insane.
Changbin: Hey, wolves mate for life. Just saying.
Jeongin groaned, shutting his phone. If this was the kind of help he was getting, he might as well wing it.
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Jeongin lay sprawled on his bed, phone in hand, mind racing with thoughts of you. He had officially entered what Jisung would call his ‘simp phase’. Your Instagram page was open, each photo worse than the last - worse because it made him fall harder.
There was one of you holding a tray of cookies, grinning. Another of you proudly presenting a painting up to the camera. The cat one nearly killed him - you were snuggled up with your orange tabby, its paw on your nose as you laughed.
And there was one with the MMA team - you had your arm looped with his in this one, your head tilted slightly towards him. It was a group photo, but that's all he could see. the two of you.
“I love her,” he whispered to himself, then immediately groaned into his pillow. “Oh my god, I love her!!”
---
Jeongin: Guys.
Jeongin: I’m in love with her.
Chan: We know.
Hyunjin: Wait, did you just figure that out?
Jeongin: No, but it’s hitting me all over again. I’m looking at her Instagram.
Jisung: Omg, show us.
Jeongin: No way.
Minho: Wow. Stalking her Insta and gatekeeping? Bold of you.
Jeongin: Shut up. She’s perfect. She bakes. She paints. She loves cats.
Minho: Cats? Suddenly she's a lot more interesting.
Jisung: Innie, DM her something flirty.
Jeongin: That’s so cringey I might die.
Chan: You guys are going to ruin his life.
Hyunjin: He needs to grow a spine. Just do it, Jeongin. Be bold.
Felix: OR…
Felix: Next time she posts something cute, comment something sweet. Like, “You’re so talented.” Compliment her! Girls love compliments.
Seungmin: That’s decent advice.
Jeongin: I can’t do that. She’ll think I’m obsessed.
Minho: You are obsessed.
Jisung: Or… Post a thirst trap. Let her know you’re hot too.
Jeongin: A thirst trap?! Like what?
Jisung: I dunno. Shirtless mirror selfie? Women eat that up.
Changbin: You don’t have enough abs for that.
Jeongin: I DO! STOP ATTACKING ME.
---
The boys were no help, as usual. Jeongin flopped onto his back, staring at the ceiling. He was doomed.
But then, as he refreshed your page, he saw it - a new post.
It was you and your cat again, this time with a caption that read: "My goodest boy 🐾."
Jeongin stared at it. Good boy. Again. The word that haunted his every waking moment. And yet, when you used it like this, he kind of wanted to melt.
He felt his thumb hovering over the like button. His mind raced.
“Cute cat!” No, too boring.
“You’re adorable.” No, too forward.
“Can I be your good boy?” Oh god, Hyunjin was invading his thoughts.
He slapped his phone face-down on the bed.
He couldn’t DM you. He couldn’t comment. What he needed was a real plan to show you he wasn’t just the kid you patted on the head.
---
Hyunjin: New plan. Jeongin, buy her flowers. Deliver them to her home.
Jeongin: That’s not the worst idea.
Jisung: But make it sexy. Like, walk in all sexy and say, “I couldn’t stop thinking about you, so I had to bring you these.”
Jeongin: YOU WANT ME TO DIE.
Felix: Wait! What if you bake her something? She likes baking, right? It’s cute and romantic.
Jeongin: I don’t know how to bake.
Chan: That’s what YouTube is for.
Minho: Or Felix can bake and you can pretend you made it.
Changbin: No way, she’d see through that in a second. She’s too smart for Jeongin’s terrible acting.
Hyunjin: He could dedicate a fight to her.
Hyunjin: Win a match and shout, “That was for you, baby!” She’ll love it.
Seungmin: Or hate it.
Jeongin: WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS.
Chan: Please don’t listen to him.
Jeongin: Oh my god, my life 😩
Felix: 😅😅😅
Hyunjin: Look, Jeongin, at the end of the day, just be confident. If you act like a man, she’ll treat you like one.
Jeongin: Easy for you to say. You’re not in love with her.
---
Jeongin tossed his phone aside, heart pounding. He didn’t know what his next move would be, but one thing was certain: he was in too deep to back out now.
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The gym that usually buzzed with activity was so quiet now. Jeongin stood across from you in the sparring ring, his gloves up, his nerves barely contained. He couldn’t believe he’d agreed to this.
Sparring with you? His brain was already a mess when you just existed near him. But now, you were in front of him, bouncing lightly on your feet, your focused expression somehow making you look even more stunning.
“Ready, champ?” you teased, your grin playful as you adjusted your gloves.
Jeongin swallowed hard, trying to focus. “Yeah. Ready.”
With a wink, you moved quickly as you circled him. Jeongin mirrored you, trying to keep his stance solid.
It was going fine. Really good actually. You were good with your arms, and he tried to return the pressure, throwing a one-two combo at you. You dodged effortlessly, and then out of nowhere, you hooked your leg behind his, pivoting your hips to execute a perfectly timed trip.
Jeongin yelped as his balance gave out, and suddenly he was on the mat, his back hitting the ground with a loud thud.
“Nice match,” you said, already kneeling over him, one hand braced on the mat beside his head. You leaned over slightly, your face hovering above his. “You okay?”
Jeongin glitched in real time.
It was all too much - your bright eyes, your playful smile, the way a few strands of your hair stuck to your forehead, glistening with sweat. He could feel the heat radiating off your body, and the concern in your voice made his heart stutter.
“I…uh…yeah,” he stammered, his voice barely above a whisper.
You tilted your head and asked, “You sure? I hope nothing hurts?”
“Pretty sure I’m dying,” he muttered, half under his breath, closing his eyes and exhaling loudly.
“What was that?”
“Nothing!” he squeaked, his face burning red.
You laughed softly, leaning back to give him space and extending your hand to help him sit up.
“You did well, Innie. Just gotta work on your balance.”
“Yeah,” he said dumbly, staring up at you like you’d hung the stars in the sky.
You tapped his cheek lightly with your gloved hand. “C’mon, champ. Let’s get you up.”
---
Jeongin: I’m never sparring with her again. Ever.
Hyunjin: What happened?
Jisung: Spill.
Jeongin: She KNOCKED ME DOWN.
Felix: Oh nooooo.
Jeongin: And instead of just walking away and letting me die with dignity, she kneels over me.
Hyunjin: Oh, that sounds spicy.
Jeongin: SPICY?! IT WASN’T SPICY. IT WAS HUMILIATING. She hovered over me with her PERFECT FACE and eyelashes and asked if I was okay. Like I’m some helpless little kitten she rescued from a tree.
Felix: Awwww. That’s so cute!
Jeongin: IT’S NOT CUTE, FELIX. IT’S A CRIME AGAINST MY MASCULINITY.
Seungmin: What masculinity?
Jeongin: SEUNGMIN, I SWEAR.
Minho: You’re spiraling again.
Jeongin: I could smell her shampoo. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
Hyunjin: Uh huh
Felix: She thinks you’re cute AND talented.
Jeongin: I WANT HER TO THINK I’M HOT.
Minho: Maybe try not to land on your ass next time.
Jeongin: Wow, great advice, hyung. I feel so much better.
Hyunjin: Bro. She’s into you.
Jeongin: SHE IS NOT.
Changbin: I mean… isn’t that kind of symbolic? Like, you’re already floored by her?
---
If the locker room was soundproof, Jeongin would've screamed so loud.
---
Jisung: Okay, okay, so she thinks you’re adorable. And a child.
Jisung: But if only she knew that you're basically ready to give her a child
Felix: OMG. Jisung, no.
Jeongin: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?!
Jisung: Am I wrong? Didn’t you literally say the other day, you'd do anything for her, even give her your last name and your firstborn child?
Jeongin: THAT WAS A PRIVATE THOUGHT, YOU GREMLIN.
Chan: What the actual fuck is going on in here?
Jisung: Oh, perfect timing, Chan-hyung! Any tips on the said topic? Since you've already done it.
Chan: Jisung. Please.
Felix: 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hyunjin: This is so out of control, and for once it's not me 🤣
Jeongin: EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU IS THE WORST.
Chan: Jeongin. Does she actually think you’re a child, or are you projecting because you’re too scared to confess?
Jeongin: I don’t know.
Changbin: Oh, he knows.
Minho: 100% projecting.
Jeongin: I somehow feel like every time she looks at me she sees a ‘cute little brother type’
Hyunjin: Then you need to show her you’re not a little brother type.
Felix: Exactly! Be confident. Flirt back. Stop acting like she’s going to break you.
Jeongin: She already DOES break me!
Hyunjin: BRO. MAN UP. Or I swear I’ll walk up to her and tell her everything.
Jeongin: IF YOU DO THAT, I WILL END YOU.
Chan: Okay, enough. Stop overthinking it. Just talk to her, show her your genuine self.
Jeongin: But what if I mess up again?
Seungmin: You’ve been messing up this whole time, and she still likes you. You’re fine.
Hyunjin: True. She probably thinks your flustered baby deer energy is charming.
Jeongin: Oh my God
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Jeongin thought he could pull it off. He thought he could just quietly distance himself from you without anyone noticing. After all, it was for the greater good. If he didn’t interact with you, maybe he could convince himself he didn’t feel anything.
But it didn’t take long for the cracks to show.
He started avoiding eye contact at the gym. No more conversations after practice. He skipped group water breaks and focused on solo drills. He even fled the gym the minute his class was done.
And you noticed. Of course you did.
Because he was literally the highlight of your day. Jeongin was a clueless idiot, because he definitely couldn't see how much you adored him, and this distance was getting to you.
---
You leaned against the wall, arms crossed as you watched Jeongin avoid your gaze for the fifth time that day. Normally, he’d flash you his shy smile or wave when you caught him looking. Now? He was all formal, barely sparing you a glance.
Something was definitely up. You waited patiently for him to come to the locker room. And of course he took the long route just to drag it out.
You huffed in annoyance before calling out, “Jeongin!”
He froze, his water bottle hovering close to his lips as he turned toward you like a deer caught in headlights.
“Oh. Uh, hey, Y/N.”
You tilted your head, scrutinizing him as you asked, “Are you okay? You’ve been weird lately.”
“Weird?” he laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. “No, I’m just… focused on training. That’s all.”
“Focused on training?” You raised an eyebrow. “Ok, so ignoring me is part of that?”
“No! I am not-” His ears turned red as he shook his head no.
You stepped closer, lowering your voice and asked, “Did I do something? Are you upset about the spar-”
“No!” he interrupted, eyes wide. “It’s not you. It’s me.”
You blinked. He did not just say that.
“Did you just hit me with the breakup line?”
Jeongin looked like he wanted to crawl under the mat.
“I…uh…I have to go.” He practically sprinted to the locker room, leaving you standing there, more confused than ever.
---
Jeongin: Guys. I fucked up.
Felix: WHAT DID YOU DO.
Jeongin: She asked if she upset me, and I panicked.
Hyunjin: Wait.
Hyunjin: You did not tell her it’s not her, it’s you.
Jeongin: HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT.
Changbin: OH MY GOD.
Jisung: LMAO. DID YOU REALLY?
Jeongin: I panicked!
Minho: This is officially the funniest thing you’ve ever done.
Chan: Okay, let’s not bully him.
Chan: Jeongin, why are you avoiding her?
Jeongin: Because I don’t want to make things worse. She already treats me like a kid. If I keep acting like an idiot around her, she’s never going to take me seriously.
Seungmin: Avoiding her isn’t going to make her take you seriously either. It’s just going to make her think you’re mad at her.
Jeongin: But what if I do something stupid?
Hyunjin: Bro. You already did the stupid thing. The bar’s on the floor.
Felix: Seriously, just TALK to her.
Jeongin: You say that like it’s easy.
Jisung: Because it is easy. Walk up to her, say, “I think you’re amazing and also I have a huge crush on you. Wanna kiss?” Done.
Jeongin: I’d rather eat a dumbbell.
Minho: Please do.
Felix: Okay, but seriously, Jeongin, if you don’t fix this, she’s going to think you hate her.
Chan: And it's gonna hurt you more than it hurts her. Or whatever.
Jeongin: Fine. I’ll talk to her. But if I embarrass myself, I’m never speaking to any of you again.
Minho: Can’t wait.
---
The next day, you were warming up when Jeongin approached you hesitantly. You glanced up, surprised.
“Oh, look who finally decided to stop ghosting me.” you said, and it broke his heart to see that you weren't giving him your usual smile.
He winced as he said, “I wasn’t ghosting you.”
“Sure felt like it.” You said, crossing your arms. “So what’s going on? And don’t give me the ‘training focus’ excuse again.”
Jeongin sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I’ve been… overthinking some stuff.”
“Stuff?” You tilted your head, waiting for him to elaborate.
“You,” he blurted out, then immediately regretted it.
“Me?”
“Yes. I mean -” He took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. “Look, Y/N. You’re amazing, okay? You’re smart and funny and strong, and you make me feel like an idiot half the time because I don’t know how to act normal around you.”
You blinked, taken aback. “Jeongin -”
“I like you,” he interrupted, words tumbling out in a rush. “A lot. And I know you probably think I’m just some kid, but I’ve been trying so hard to prove I’m not. And it’s probably really obvious now, and I’m sorry if I’ve been weird or -”
“Jeongin.” You stepped closer, cutting him off.
“Sorry.” He looked at you, panic written all over his face.
But you smiled, your heart softening. He was so damn adorable, you wanted to bite him. To say the least.
“You don’t have to prove anything. I never thought of you as just some kid.”
“You didn’t?”
“No. And for the record…” You reached out, ruffling his hair with a grin. “I like you too, Innie.”
Jeongin covered his face with his hands, whining, but he couldn’t stop the huge grin that spread across his face.
"C'mere you," you said, and Jeongin surged into your arms, letting you hug him tight.
---
Jeongin: SHE LIKES ME BACK. OMG. I'M HYPERVENTILATING.
Hyunjin: NO WAY.
Felix: OMG!!! YESS!!!
Jisung: What did you say? How did it happen? Give us details!
Jeongin: I just told her I like her. She said she likes me too.
Chan: See? Told you honesty works.
Hyunjin: So when’s the wedding?
Minho: Well, that's what you get for being such a good boy.
Jeongin: OH MY GOD.
Seungmin: Congrats bro
Changbin: Go celebrate. Go get outta here!
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Divider: @saradika-graphics
Tags: @moonchild9350 @velvetmoonlght @eastjonowhere @pixie-felix @sailor--sun @chancloud8 @captainchrisstan
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avatarofthearchives · 1 day ago
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Random Magnus Archive Headcanons
A: Gertrude used to have a hippie aesthetic. There's only a handful of pictures that serve as evidence for this, and no one in her life has ever seen them.
B: Georgie loves DND and has a group she plays with on weekends. She's the DM.
C: Gerard is bad at making decisions and tends to flip a coin when he's unsure. He doesn't always listen to the coin, but he finds it to be a good way to figure out which outcome he'd actually been hoping for.
D: Jon doesn't realize this about himself, but he always plays paper when playing rock, paper, scissors. He doesn't understand how he keeps loosing to Martin.
E: Michael Shelley had hiccup fits all the time.
F: Anabelle has done despicable and worrying things in every version of "The Sims" franchise. Including "The Sims Free Play" which...is almost impressive.
G: Jon found the Creepypasta website when he was a teen and genuinely thought he stumbled upon an Archive of documented supernatural encounters. He obviously hadn't, and he realized that sooner than later, but not before gaining anxiety around the idea of hyper realistic eyes. (Jon after starting the apocalypse: "Martin this is just like that website. The pasta one.")
H: Agnes is always wearing at least one piece of jewelry. Most people assume it's am aesthetic thing, but really she just likes having something on her to fiddle with. She doesn't know what to do with her hands otherwise.
I: Peter and Elias frequently send each other letters written on their finest parchment paper and mailed in a homemade envelope closed with their own personal wax seal. Then, after receiving each others letters, they shred them to be petty. They both know the other person shreds them, but they keep putting in a large amount of effort anyways. Their dynamic is incomprehensible.
J: Melanie has always had a deeply unnatural skill that's come in handy many times in her life: She can train cats to do tricks. No one knows how she does it, not even herself, but give her an hour and a box of treats and she'll have a cat sitting 50% of the time...Which is an impressively high number if you've ever met a cat.
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the-crooked-library · 18 hours ago
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I would like to point out how clearly remake shows us that Ellen is not satisfied with Thomas sexually because their sex scene which is shot to be not sexy on purpose clearly, also shows us that when Thomas takes her Ellen thinks and talks about Orlok and wants Thomas to be like Orlok aka kiss her heart. But he can’t. He can’t give her what she wants.
^^^^ YES this aspect is incredibly prominent, and a significant component of the disconnect in Ellen's marriage to Thomas! There's a few intersecting issues there, but they all do come down to the same thing. Ellen isn't satisfied, because Thomas is never willing to actually take her desires and preferences into account when they are together.
It's shown numerous times that, in a sexual context, Ellen wants to be worshipped. She has a dominant and possessive streak, she is extremely sensual, and these elements are essential to her pleasure. They also intersect with her desire to be seen and recognized for who she is, as well to be given the respect she is so consistently denied. These desires are all strongly discouraged - both in her time, and sometimes in ours. As a woman, she is expected to be deferring; and chaste, except for when her husband chooses. Her opinions and complexity are also never really considered; which is not unexpected, of course. Ellen is a Tragic Madwoman - it's Ophelia, all over again. If you recall, when Hamlet appears mad, the people around him assume there is more to it than his father's death; but when Ophelia does, everybody chalks it up to her father's murder, and nothing else. With all that said, what I personally love about Ellen is that, despite whatever shame she might feel around the subject, or her efforts to be proper, she always knows exactly what she wants. In part, that's what makes her married life so tragic - she keeps reaching out to Thomas, offering him these vulnerable aspects of herself, as well as an opportunity to understand her and connect with her; and she is met with one rejection after another. Still, she cannot ignore what she is - and her choosing Orlok in the end is symbolic of her deciding to "deceive" herself no longer.
Thomas, by contrast, is playing mind games with himself. In theory, he could be submissive. If he indulged that potential within himself, it could be a way for them to connect - considering Ellen's inclinations; however, he sees this aspect of himself as weak, emasculating, shameful, and thus never explores it - except by force, as per the usual gothic exploration of shame/desire, which muddles the waters in that regard. Much of the way he treats Ellen is rooted in the patriarchal rules he cannot bring himself to abandon, since doing so threatens his own sense of masculinity - and, by extension, dignity and self-worth. As such, whenever faced with a situation that might prompt him to be soft, emotional, or worshipful of her, he overcorrects instead. He is afraid of Ellen's perceived "abnormality" because of what it might mean for him. Additionally, he is fairly obviously queercoded, in a classic vampire-genre way; which, in my opinion, is yet another reason they just don't quite seem to click. Whatever he might want out of a sexual relationship, he doesn't really want it with Ellen - and, of course, given his homophobic society, that just piles on more shame, emasculation, and repression. This is why, after their one depicted sexual scene, when she laments her "uncleanliness," he cannot reassure her, no matter how he tries. He cannot accept the "abnormal" aspects of her, because the way he sees her is always affected by the way he sees himself - through a lens of misogyny, queerphobia, and horror. His care for her is therefore largely superficial; he does not know her.
All in all, I am obsessed with this aspect of their failmarriage. They're both so lonely and so desperate for companionship; but neither of them is getting what they want. Not with each other.
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wishful-seeker · 6 hours ago
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It took me 5 or 6 tries before i found the right therapist. The first one i ever met forced me to claim a certain abuse happened to me that never did! Because of her i refused therapy for like 10 years. When i dipped my toe in the water again the first one i met tried to tell me all my problems were caused by my parents divorce (lmao), the next one was a very nice man i had many sessions with, but he didn't fully understand me as a woman, so he referred me to a lady and she has been my therapist for the past 10 years and i love her! She is like family! Its hard and unfair but there are gems, don't ever force yourself to deal with a therapist you don't like. It doesn't have to be any concrete reason, if the vibes are off, bounce!
I have gotten quite a few asks which can be summarized as "my therapist doesn't believe me and keeps blaming me for my problems, but I know I have to stick with therapy if I want to get better-", and I need everyone to realize that therapy isn't inherently good and effective, nor is it always necessary for getting better. Having a bad therapist can actually be more harmful to your recovery than not having one! If your therapist makes you worse or doesn't help you, it's okay to walk away, whether to find a new one or to find healing in something else. You are in fact not morally obligated to see a therapist just because you're mentally ill.
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hollowed-theory-hall · 1 day ago
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Dumbledore is a little full of himself
Like, I read Tales of Beedle the Bard, and I was struck by how Dumbledore comments on his own cleverness and knowledge in his notes incredibly often:
This prejudice eventually died out in the face of overwhelming evidence that some of the world’s most brilliant wizards(3) were, to use the common phrase, “Muggle-lovers”. [...] 3 Such as myself.
(Albus Dumbledore on “The Wizard and the Hopping Pot”)
I think I may say, without vanity, that both my Fountain and my Hill performed the parts allotted to them with simple goodwill. Alas, that the same could not be said of the rest of the cast.
(Albus Dumbledore on “The Fountain of Fair Fortune”)
Even I, Albus Dumbledore, would find it easiest to refuse the Invisibility Cloak; which only goes to show that, clever as I am, I remain just as big a fool as anyone else.
(Albus Dumbledore on “The Tale of the Three Brothers”)
The guy can hardly talk about anything without talking about how smart and wise and brilliant he is. Like, no humility whatsoever.
In the books, everyone keeps singing his praises like Dumbledore can do no wrong and the only one who keeps saying Dumbledore can be wrong is Harry. And even then, in Harry's limbo vision of King's Cross, which I don't think is really Dumbledore, it's telling Harry envisions him saying something like this:
“And you knew this? You knew — all along?” “I guessed. But my guesses have usually been good,” said Dumbledore happily
(DH, Ch35)
Dumbledore doesn't speak to Harry all that often throughout the series, with book 6 being the one he interacts with him the most. And we see that even in conversations with people, Dumbledore loves to hear how wise and great he is. When he says "I might be mistaken" it's with the tone of "I'm right and everyone else is wrong". Which is usually the case often enough, yes (though not always), but he does it a lot, and I found it interesting how often he uses this phrasing and how smug he seems about it:
And then Dumbledore called out from the back row where he stood with the other teachers — “Aha! Unless I am very much mistaken, the delegation from Beauxbatons approaches!” (GOF)
“I may be wrong,” said Dumbledore pleasantly, “but I am sure that under the Wizengamot Charter of Rights, the accused has the right to present witnesses for his or her case? Isn’t that the policy of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Madam Bones?” he continued, addressing the witch in the monocle. (OotP)
“Payment?” said Harry. “You’ve got to give the door something?” “Yes,” said Dumbledore. “Blood, if I am not much mistaken.” (HBP)
Dumbledore uses this phrasing when he knows what he is saying is correct. He is saying it not because he thinks he might actually be wrong. When he actually thinks he is wrong, he makes excuses and tries to reason why the decision he made was actually reasonable at the time:
“Harry, I owe you an explanation,” said Dumbledore. “An explanation of an old man’s mistakes. For I see now that what I have done, and not done, with regard to you, bears all the hallmarks of the failings of age. Youth cannot know how age thinks and feels. But old men are guilty if they forget what it was to be young ... and I seem to have forgotten lately...”
(OotP)
He is incapable of saying: "I was wrong, it happens, let's move on," it has to come with reasoning or an excuse. He blames it on his age, not that he made a wrong judgment call. This isn't humbleness.
Dumbledore is a character who wants to be humble but just isn't. he considers modesty a virtue. Hell, humility is practically his favorite trait Harry possess:
Harry, who could not see any way out of this without flatly lying, nodded but still said nothing. Slughorn beamed at him. “So modest, so modest, no wonder Dumbledore is so fond — you were there, then?
(HBP) - Slughorn mentions how Dumbledore appreciates modesty.
The third brother in the story (“the humblest and also the wisest”) is the only one who understands that, having narrowly escaped Death once, the best he can hope for is to postpone their next meeting for as long as possible.
(Albus Dumbledore on “The Tale of the Three Brothers”)
He appreciates being humble and modest and sees it as being wise. He derides Tom for thinking of himself as "special" or "clever" even when it's true (and when he does the same). He loves Harry's modesty, which is really low self-esteem, not modesty. Harry's low self-worth is like the ultimate humbleness in Dumbledore's eyes because he doesn't see it for what it is and he was never humble in his life, so he doesn't really know where the balance between confidence and arrogance is or the line between modesty and low self-worth. I think he honestly doesn't know because he is exceptionally arrogant.
Dumbledore created this image of ineffability around him and it's clear Harry is one of the only people (besides Dumbledore and Aberforth) who knows Dumbledore can make a mistake and he keeps reminding Hermione, Lupin, and literally everyone else of that fact:
“People have said it, many times. It comes down to whether or not you trust Dumbledore’s judgment. I do; therefore, I trust Severus.” “But Dumbledore can make mistakes,” argued Harry. “He says it himself. And you” — he looked Lupin straight in the eye — “do you honestly like Snape?”
(HBP)
This is all another case of Dumbledore being incapable of practicing what he preaches. He values modesty, but he doesn't seem to be capable of it.
Now, I'm not saying he isn't clever or special, he is. But he is the type of really smart person who looks down on anyone they don't see as intelligent as them. He doesn't see most people as equal to him.
Dumbledore doesn't see most of the Order or Aberforth as his equals. He never did. Elphias Doge kisses his ass, but Dumbledore clearly doesn't share the same level of respect for him. Or for most people, really.
“Elphias Doge mentioned her to us,” said Harry, trying to spare Hermione. “That old berk,” muttered Aberforth, taking another swig of mead. “Thought the sun shone out of my brother’s every office, he did. Well, so did plenty of people, you three included, by the looks of it.” Harry kept quiet. He did not want to express the doubts and uncertainties about Dumbledore that had riddled him for months now. [...] “Grindelwald. And at last, my brother had an equal to talk to someone just as bright and talented as he was. And looking after Ariana took a backseat then, while they were hatching all their plans for a new Wizarding order and looking for Hallows, and whatever else it was they were so interested in.
(DH)
Dumbledore doesn't trust the majority of the Order with anything because he doesn't think they'd be capable of handling it because they're not him. He literally tells them nothing until he has to, keeping them busy guarding a prophecy he knows can't be stolen by a run-of-the-mill Death Eater. He only tells Harry about the Horcruxes because he has no choice but to tell him. Same with Snape — Dumbledore trusts him out of necessity.
Snape and Grindelwald are the only people we see Dumbledore show respect towards their abilities, wisdom, and magic in some capacity.
Like, he calls Sirius clever, but he talks about him as foolish in the same breath. He calls McGonagall wise, but he clearly doesn't think she's wise enough to be told anything or trusted with anything. And while he does speak highly of Harry's courage and humility and though Harry is insanely powerful and with the right training could beat Dumbledore, Dumbledore keeps putting him down when it comes to magical abilities/intelligence compared to himself:
“I’m not upset.” “Harry, you were never a good Occlumens — ”
(HBP) - even though Harry can and does get really good at it once he does it his way.
“I do not think you will count, Harry: You are underage and unqualified. Voldemort would never have expected a sixteen-year-old to reach this place: I think it unlikely that your powers will register compared to mine.”
(HBP)
I find this tendency of Dumbledore to be really interesting. He underestimates people constantly and thinks too highly of himself. and he is very honest about it to people's faces. He keeps talking about how Voldemort’s defenses on his Horcruxes are shit, and how Voldemort is foolish when the curse Voldemort left on the ring is literally killing him at that very moment:
“I do not think you will count, Harry: You are underage and unqualified. Voldemort would never have expected a sixteen-year-old to reach this place: I think it unlikely that your powers will register compared to mine.” These words did nothing to raise Harry’s morale; perhaps Dumbledore knew it, for he added, “Voldemort’s mistake, Harry, Voldemort’s mistake ... Age is foolish and forgetful when it underestimates youth. ... Now, you first this time, and be careful not to touch the water.”
(HBP)
Dumbledore thinking himself so clever, more clever than Voldemort, is what killed him. His arrogant insistence that he's the smartest man in the room killed him. He is undermining Voldemort for mistakes similar to the ones he makes regularly when interacting with Harry. And he's aware of that. He knows he's a hypocrite:
When I discovered it, after all those years, buried in the abandoned home of the Gaunts—the Hallow I had craved most of all, though in my youth I had wanted it for very different reasons—I lost my head, Harry. I quite forgot that it was now a Horcrux, that the ring was sure to carry a curse. I picked it up, and I put it on, and for a second I imagined that I was about to see Ariana, and my mother, and my father, and to tell them how very, very sorry I was . . . “I was such a fool, Harry. After all those years I had learned nothing. I was unworthy to unite the Deadly Hallows. I had proved it time and again, and here was the final proof.”
(DH) - Dumbledore's portrait
I think Dumbledore's self-awareness is why he wants to like Harry as much as he does. While I don't think Dumbledore knows Harry as well as he thinks he does, what Dumbledore does see is enough for him to imagine Harry in his head as this perfect, virtuous martyr that he wished all his life to portray himself as. He idealizes who he imagines Harry is without fully respecting Harry as his own person with his own abilities.
I just find it interesting that for a character who speaks so highly of humility, he doesn't seem to possess it, and that it ends up being the death of him.
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