#he does fail Mrs. Bennet! I have compassion for her there

[itspileofgoodthings]

one of the things that continues to strike me on reread is how much the character of Darcy, and Austen through him, finds Mr. Bennet dead. And how much Elizabeth, in growing and changing and discarding her past blindness, has to move past her way of seeing her father and thus of seeing reality, because the two are connected! Darcy’s letter exposes her father’s flaws to Elizabeth in a way she’d never been able to see before. Most especially the way his laziness and neglect of his own gifts have hurt his family and that ultimately he doesn’t. care. Not enough to change. It literally says that she comes home from Hunsford and tries to laugh at her sisters’ and mother’s folly (the way she used to; the way her father has taught her to by example for her whole life) and she can’t anymore! It sticks in her throat. She is grieved by the failures that she sees in him, all the more so because she IS his favorite and she loves him! And the thing about Mr. Bennet is he never changes. The Lydia/wickham situation exposes to him sharply his own conduct and the consequences and he feels it! Because he is neither stupid nor unfeeling. But he, like everyone, has free will. And he chooses not to change when the opportunity presents itself. He even jokes about how quickly his feeling bad will pass and how soon everything will go back to normal, to his laziness and his selfishness. He is set in his ways and he serves as a contrast to Elizabeth’s personal journey because he embodies a version of a person she could have become and was in danger of becoming if her only goal at all times was to laugh at and judge people from the sidelines.

[dastardly-homo-writing]

(Queer) Pride and Prejudice || Chapter Two

Thank you so much to anyone who read the first chapter! I’ll be attempting to get out as many chapters as possible before uni starts again.

Without further ado, let’s meet Lezzie.

__________________________

Chapter Two: Lezzie Makes A Brief Appearance

Mr. Bennet was among the earliest of those who waited on Ms. Bingley. He had always intended to visit her, though to the last always assuring his wife that he should not go; and till the evening after the visit was paid she had no knowledge of it. It was then disclosed in the following manner. Observing his second daughter employed in trimming a hat, he suddenly addressed her with:

“I hope Ms. Bingley will like it, Lezzie.”

Lezzie, though unfailingly partial to her father, was largely unmoved by the thought.

“We are not in a way to know what Ms. Bingley likes,” said her mother resentfully, “since we are not to visit.”

“But you forget, mamma,” said Lezzie, “that we shall meet her at the assemblies, and that Mrs. Longfinger promised to introduce her.”

“I do not believe Mrs. Longfinger will do any such thing. She has two nieces of her own. She is a selfish, hypocritical woman, and I have no opinion of her. Other than what I have just said.”

“No more have I,” said Mr. Bennet, side-eyeing Lezzie, lips twitching; “and I am glad to find that you do not depend on her serving you.”

Mrs. Bennet deigned not to make any reply, but, unable to contain herself, began scolding one of her daughters.

“Don’t keep coughing so, Kitty, for Heaven’s sake! Have a little compassion on my nerves. You tear them to pieces.”

“Kitty has no discretion in her coughs,” said her father; “she times them ill.”

“I do not cough for my own amusement,” replied Kitty fretfully. “When is your next ball to be, Lezzie?”

“To-morrow fortnight.”

“Aye, so it is,” cried her mother, “and Mrs. Longfinger does not come back till the day before; so it will be impossible for her to introduce Ms. Bingley, for she will not know her herself.”

“Then, my dear, you may have the advantage of your friend, and introduce the handsome Ms. Bingley to her.”

“Impossible, Mr. Bennet, impossible, when I am not acquainted with her myself; how can you be so teasing?” Mrs. Bennet could not hide her pleasure at her husband’s compliment of the bachelorette’s appearance.

“I honour your circumspection. A fortnight’s acquaintance is certainly very little. One cannot know what a woman really is by the end of a fortnight. Certainly not with me as the judge. But if we do not venture somebody else will; and after all, Mrs. Longfinger and her daughters must stand their chance; and, therefore, as she will think it an act of kindness, if you decline the office, I will take it on myself.”

The girls stared at their father. Mrs. Bennet said only, “Nonsense, nonsense!”

“What can be the meaning of that emphatic exclamation?” cried he. “Do you consider the forms of introduction, and the stress that is laid on them, as nonsense? I cannot quite agree with you there. What say you, Mary? For you are a young lady of deep reflection, I know, and read great books and make extracts.”

Mary wished to say something sensible, but knew not how. Where her quill often succeeded, her tongue failed her.

“While Mary is adjusting her ideas,” he continued, not the least insultingly, “let us return to Ms. Bingley.”

“I am sick of Ms. Bingley,” cried his wife. “I am sorry to hear that; but why did not you tell me that before? If I had known as much this morning I certainly would not have called on her. It is very unlucky; but as I have actually paid the visit, we cannot escape the acquaintance now.”

The astonishment of the ladies was just what he wished; that of Mrs. Bennet perhaps surpassing the rest; though, when the first tumult of joy was over, she began to declare that it was what she had expected all the while. “How good it was in you, my dear Mr. Bennet! But I knew I should persuade you at last. I was sure you loved your girls too well to neglect such a promising acquaintance. Well, how pleased I am! and it is such a good joke, too, that you should have gone this morning and never said a word about it till now.”

“Now, Kitty, you may cough as much as you choose,” said Mr. Bennet; and, as he spoke, he left the room, fatigued with the raptures of his wife. Resurfacing to his mind once again were the old letters of his beloved. Dirty scrawls on scraps of parchment. Unwomanly penmanship, snuck under candlelight in the middle of the servant’s headquarters. A man he would have had all the intentions of wedding, if not for the impossibility of it all. Alas, this other lifetime was now but a fond apparition. It did not do well to dwell on the past.

“What an excellent father you have, girls!” said Mrs. Bennet, when the door was shut. “I do not know how you will ever make him amends for his kindness; or me, either, for that matter. At our time of life it is not so pleasant, I can tell you, to be making new acquaintances every day; but for your sakes, we would do anything. Lydia, my love, though you are the youngest, I dare say Ms. Bingley will dance with you at the next ball.”

“Oh!” said Lydia stoutly, “I am not afraid; for though I am the youngest, I am the tallest.”

The rest of the evening was spent in conjecturing how soon she would return Mr. Bennet’s visit, and determining when they should ask her to dinner. This topic was second only to the debate on whether or not Ms. Bingley would be the type of lesbian to have ethical dietary restrictions.

____________________________

I am cross-posting on AO3 (dastardly_homo_writing) :)

[silver-summertime]

song analysis: sapphic undertones in “ivy”

Happy New Year, y’all! Let’s end the year right with an “ivy” analysis. If you follow me, you probably know that I am OBSESSED with this song. It’s an absolute masterpiece and it might actually rival Cruel Summer for the title of my favorite Taylor Swift song.

So let’s get into it. From the first listen, this song read to me as being about an affair between two women, one of whom is married to a man. Obviously, the love interest in “ivy” could be a man, but Taylor chooses to address the song to a genderless “you,” so I’m going to have fun analyzing this as if it is gay. This song reads similarly to me as “Begin Again” and “The Way I Loved You,” which both have three characters who play similar roles. In all cases, the narrator speaks to a genderless love interest “you,” who is directly contrasted with a “he” figure. In “ivy,” it is unclear if the narrator is already married or simply engaged to the “he” figure.

We’ll start with the first verse, which sets the tone for the rest of the song. The line “where the spirit meets the bones” seems to have been inspired by the poem “Compassion” by Miller Williams. The full line is “You do not know what wars are going on/down there where the spirit meets the bone.” Thematically, the poem deals with the contrast between appearances and a person’s real feelings or mental state, which relates to “ivy” and “illicit affairs.” In both, Taylor writes about an affair from a compassionate perspective—in the case of “ivy,” it seems as if the narrator’s hands are tied; there is some external factor that prevents her from breaking up her engagement or marriage, which makes the listener sympathetic to her situation. I’d also argue that a lot of this sympathy comes from the perception of “ivy” as a period piece—it is easy to be sympathetic to a woman who is trapped in a marriage she never really agreed to in the first place.

Why does “ivy” read like a period piece? It’s all about the language. At contrast to “illicit affairs,” which very explicitly mentions parking lots and therefore has a more modern setting, “ivy” almost exclusively uses natural imagery. This is reminiscent of Romantic-era writing, which is characterized by a reverence for nature and beauty.

Examples of Romantic-inspired natural imagery:

oh, I can’t/stop you putting roots in my dreamland/my house of stone, your ivy grows

your opal eyes are all I wish to see

clover blooms in the fields/spring breaks loose

crescent moon, coast is clear

so yeah, it’s a fire/it’s a goddamn blaze in the dark

Beyond the use of nature as a metaphor, Romantic writing also features an emphasis on emotion over reason and a focus on the individual. “Ivy” clearly outlines a conflict between emotion and reason as well as individualism versus societal expectations; the narrator’s affair with the love interest (which is a transgression of societal norms) is a result of letting emotion outweigh reason. The narrator in “ivy” feels like she has failed to uphold society’s expectations of her as a wife—she directly contrasts herself with the “old widow” who “goes to the stone every day,” suggesting that the widow properly mourns her deceased husband. The narrator, by contrast, is “grieving for the living,” an inherently selfish preoccupation. However, the narrator’s emotions are presented in a compassionate light consistent with Romanticism.  

Certain lines also sound a bit historical because Taylor could have used more modern linguistic structures or vocabulary but chose not to. The line “your opal eyes are all I wish to see” instead of “want to see,” for example. See also:

your touch brought forth an incandescent glow

I wish to know/the fatal flaw that makes you long to be/magnificently cursed

my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand/taking mine, but it’s been promised to another

The way the narrator’s “hand” has “been promised to another” is what sticks out most to me; it very much suggests that the engagement is not the narrator’s choice but may have been arranged (a la Mrs. Bennet’s drive to marry off her daughters in Pride and Prejudice). It’s also a contrast to the way engagement is described in “champagne problems,” which is much more modern (explicit references to dorms, Chevys, and Dom Pérignon). This kind of phrasing is a conscious choice by Taylor to make the song seem more “literary,” which makes it feel historical rather than current.

So what makes me think this song is gay? Honestly, it’s more of a feeling than anything concrete, but that’s the way queer-coding works: subtly enough that straight people don’t notice it, but specific enough to the queer experience that we pick up on it. This is yet another example of Taylor writing about a relationship that’s “just wrong enough to make it feel right” (thanks, “Sparks Fly”). The narrator seems caught off-guard by the affair (repeatedly asking “how’s one to know?”) and blames the love interest for being irresistible despite the inherent danger of pursuing anything (“it’s the goddamn fight of my life/and you started it”).

Of course, if the song takes place in a historical setting, any affair would be grounds for societal condemnation, but especially so if the love interest is a woman. I think the lyrics “I wish to know/the fatal flaw that makes you long to be/magnificently cursed” are especially telling.

Breaking it down: a) the narrator thinks the love interest is irrational for wanting to start this affair because b) being with the narrator will make the love interest cursed. This latter part is important because historically, there is usually a lot more fallout for women than men after affairs. Even when a married/partnered man is the one engaging in infidelity, the mistress often takes the brunt of the criticism (see: the media’s treatment of Monica Lewinsky, many a country song where the woman blames the mistress instead of her cheating partner). This article is an interesting look at the double standards surrounding chastity and fidelity for men and women.

This is all a long way to say that if the love interest in “ivy” is indeed a man, there is no reason this affair would leave him “magnificently cursed.” The narrator, as a woman and also as the married party in the affair (the love interest is not necessarily married), would most likely be the one to take the majority of the blame. I think there is an alternative interpretation: the love interest’s “fatal flaw” is her romantic interest in women, which would certainly leave her “magnificently cursed” were anyone to discover her affair with a married woman.

So that’s why “ivy” seems gay, I think! Let me know if you have any questions or other theories, I would love to hear them. And please let me know if you want me to analyze any other songs. If only I had this much fun writing essays for English classes…

All sources are hyperlinked within the analysis, if you’re interested in some further reading.

[funkymbtifiction]

What’s been your experience of knowing a person of each Enneagram type?

It’s nothing if not interesting. 😉

1s: can be principled, dutiful, and reliable. Their pet peeve is for people to be rude, irresponsible, inconsiderate, or late. I’ve known an sp 1 and a soc 1. The sp 1 does indeed resemble a 6 due to content fretting, low self esteem, terror of getting it wrong, and general anxiety, but shows 1 behaviors of obsessive cleaning, a desperate need to control everything, and rigidity in setting up “house rules.” In so doing, she has denied herself anything that is not “useful,” which I find terribly sad. She has no room for pleasure in her life. The soc 1 is far more inclined to be assertive, to correct others, to point out what they are doing wrong, and to show her anger. Much less self doubt.

2s: ah, 2s. I’ve known a few marginally and one “sort of” well, since I spent ten days with her on a visit to another state. She truly reminded me of Molly Weasley in her bustling about, her attending to everyone’s numerous needs (and ability to keep us all in line), her pride in doing things for everyone, and her sensitivities. At one point, her daughter told her, “MOM, STOP MOLLY WEASLEY-ING CHARITY! SHE’S FINE. SHE DOESN’T NEED WATER. THANKS.” Ha, ha. I liked her a great deal, but it amused me how defensively she drove – under stress, I saw her 8 come out, though I didn’t know that’s what it was at the time. We all snapped to attention whenever that happened.

3s: I admire their work ethic but… the one I know offline has to find some way to impress people, no matter what. If that is in showing you his muscles and making sure you know how far he biked today, so be it. It used to be because he was proud of his professional life. Since retirement, I have seen him struggle enormously with having a sense of purpose and trying to find one that doesn’t hinge on his non-existent work. That is what worries me about 3s – getting old, and no longer having society regard them as “useful and essential” is HELL on them. Please, make sure, if you are a 3, to do the internal work on figuring out who you are, and recognizing your own worth as separate from what you do, before you reach that age.

4s: I have known a lot of 4s, some healthy and some not. I have two delightful healthy ones in my life right now – an sp/sx 4 and an soc/sp 4, and they are indeed different. The sp 4 is more internal and less aware of or inclined to change herself for others; the soc 4 looks outward, and is highly attentive to other people. Sp 4 can take on others’ pain and burdens in a sense and feel overwhelmed by it – and with both of these beautiful girls, I’ve seen it turn them toward compassion. But they do tend to run high on “drama.” It’s not a song, it’s an opera. I knew an unhealthy 4 once who was hell-bound to remain miserable and a victim wallowing in her pain and thwarted (almost sadistically gleefully) anyone’s attempts to help her rise above her bad situation. She wanted to stay there. And she drove everyone who knew her insane. Eventually, she lost all her friends due to her being the wet mop all the time -- which of course, fed into her sadistic happiness at being miserable, abandoned, and unloved.

5s: can be callous at times, just because they are so lacking in emotional self-awareness and so fixated on logical solutions, but they will give it to you straight if you ask for it. They tend toward severe social awkwardness—think Mr. Darcy at the Netherfield Ball. Most inclined to disappear five minutes after you meet them and remain unseen until you leave. I knew a five once, the father of a friend, who would call out hello to me as he walked right past me, straight down into the basement, where he hid for hours among his books. Given he had a house full of giggling, silly girls, I don’t blame him. He was truly Mr. Bennet.

6s: can be either the warmest, funniest, most loyal people you will ever meet – or the biggest pains in the butt, and I say that as a 6. I know one other sp 6 and he reminds me of myself, just older and male – we both are hilarious, we both tease people to establish a rapport with them, we both crave feedback and support from trusted others, and we both swing between concern and optimism. But unhealthy, paranoid 6s are out in force right now freaking everyone out about the COVID-19 and the world doesn’t need that. It needs HOPE. So for heaven’s sake, put down the freak-outs, the paranoid accusations, the wild conspiracy theories, and accept that your worst-case scenario projections are just that -- the product of your own scared mind. It may or may not happen, and trust me, 6s, I know damn well that your worst fears usually don’t happen anywhere except in your head.

7s: are enormous fun to go on vacation with, but can be flakes. Lovable ones, but still flakes. They promise more than they can deliver and then avoid you rather than face up to the music when they realize they don’t want to do what they promised. They are hilarious, witty, optimistic, and their enthusiasm is infectious, but sometimes they fail to realize that not everyone wants to be endlessly teased, mocked, or come home to a mountain of stuff followed by a maxed-out credit card bill. Life is not always a joke, sometimes it is serious. And they are inclined not to finish a serious conversation if it in any way makes them uncomfortable or feel like they’re about to confront part of themselves.

8s: I have only known one and… there are things I like about her. Her courage. Her ballsy attitude. This woman made a place for herself in a man’s world, in a time when that was not done. She bulldozed her way to the top. Unfortunately, she never shut off the bulldozer. She has burned bridges behind her, made countless enemies, and gets into foolish personal and legal fights because she refuses to back down from anyone, and will turn anything into an argument. She lost my mother as a friend, because she thought bullying her was a good idea. My mother set up polite boundaries and the 8 trampled them, something my mother does not forgive. Something 8s need to remember – what is fun for you (you consider fighting “bonding”) is not always fun for someone else who is not an 8. Being an 8 is an asset, but only if you learn to tell the difference between a threat and a non-threat.

9s: are some of the most precious people on earth, but also the must frustrating for me, because I see them being mercilessly treated by the rest of the world, which tends to walk all over them. I wind up counseling 9 friends who are frustrated at ‘not being heard’ but cannot find it within themselves to assert themselves in any way, or think they deserve to be heard, or know how to recognize what is NOT okay. Being a 9, a peacemaker, someone able to understand everyone’s point of view, is a valuable gift, but you cannot use it for good if you are incapable of believing you deserve good things, too.

Each Enneagram type has a health level. You can find them at the Enneagram Institute. Figure out which level is ‘you’ and start working toward the next one up, through conscious choices. You don’t have to stay this way. Your life is yours to command.1s, you don’t have to be perfect. 2s, you don’t have to please others. 3s, you don’t have to win every time. 4s, you don’t have to stay in a place of self-loathing. 5s, you don’t have to fear trying things. 6s, you don’t have to be afraid all the time. 7s, you don’t have to run away from everything. 8s, you don’t have to turn every discussion into a fight. 9s, you don’t have to give everyone whatever they want. It’s time to take back your life.

- ENFP Mod

PS: Most of these examples come from my extended family, none of whom follow this blog, so if you’re one of my friends (unless you are the 4) -- I’m not talking about you. ;)

[dimpledkoala]

Vanity (Pride and Prejudice AU) | KNJ

Masterlist

A/N: Hello new Readers! I’m a new Tumblr account and I thought about sharing my work on this platform, as I have fallen in love with many fanfic writers on this platform. I will post a masterlist soon to organize my story, but for now this account will strictly be BTS related. Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite books of all time, and I’ve just gotten inspiration for this AU from none other than my own bias. All seven boys will be included in this story, so please enjoy!

Chapter 1

Word Count: 4,030

Genre: Kim Namjoon x OC (reader’s POV), slight angst

Quote: “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.”

As you always did every morning, you took an early morning walk amongst the grounds of your family’s land. Your family was not one of a high status, but your father was able to support a living for his wife and five daughters. You were the fourth child of the five, and all were still single. However, in comparison to your sisters, there was no hope of you ever being able to woo a man of great fortune.

There was Sophia, the eldest, who was considered to not only be the most beautiful creature in the land, but of the most amiable nature as well. Her beauty and singing voice captured the hearts of many men, though none had the courage to make her an offer of marriage. However, there was one man, Jungkook Jeon, who has been engaging her for the past few months, and the family expected the two to be a wedded couple soon.

Ah, then there was Jessie, the second oldest by only a year younger. She too had similar charms as her older sister, though others, including her own mother, have said her beauty is not as striking as Sophia’s. It might be due to her glasses, but her and her sisters knew that it would be poor of someone to judge her solely on her beauty. Jessie’s charm was found in her talents, such as playing the piano, drawing, and knitting, all which she could do at a high level.

Out of all the girls, Iris had been noted to compete with Sophia’s beauty. She is the most graceful and nonetheless the best dancer at every ball they attended. She did not have the talent to play an instrument, though she was very skilled at cooking and was personable enough to strike a hearty conversation with anyone in her company.

Tina was the youngest, and her youth struck the hearts of many young men. She shared the same talents as Jessie and Iris, but was considered to be the most enjoyable company. She was considered to be the most humorous, and competed with Sophia for being the most amiable.

And you. What was so interesting about you, the second youngest, having been thrown in the mix? You were caught in the shadow of your sisters. Your talents and personality were a combination of the other four, but failed to stand out in a unique way. Unlike the rest, you were of a witty and independent nature. You were not considered graceful at all, as you had a tendency to break things due to your clumsy nature. You did not fall easily for the first guy to try to win your charms, especially if they were at an inferior level of mind to yours. You were the last choice of marriage amongst the Bennet sisters, and honestly? You were okay with that. You had more freedom, and who gave a damn about romance anyway? Leave the burden your mother was oh-so worried about to your elder sisters, who were pressured to find a suitable husband with a great fortune. Being who you were gave you the freedom to explore like this on your own.

Reading was among your favorite pastimes, and on your early morning walks, you read of your favorite stories, particularly plays and poems that were written over a century ago. Shakespeare was undeniably a genius of his time, and his tragedies were among your favorites, especially Romeo and Juliet. It did not make you weep for the star-crossed lovers, rather it made you chortle at the naivety of the two lovers. Two people of a different class status, especially those who had rivaled families, would never be able to successfully have a relationship. You were inspired by these works, and attempted to write a few plays and stories of your own, which you always found inadequate. You were in the middle of reading the balcony scene in Act 2, which read:

“If thou dost love, pronounce it faithfully:

Or if thou think'st I am too quickly won,

I'll frown and be perverse an say thee nay,

So thou wilt woo; but else, not for the world.

In truth, fair-”

Your thoughts were suddenly interrupted by your collision with Tina, who immediately scolded you for not paying attention to your surroundings. By the way you two cursed at each other without proper manner, many would consider you two enemies. However, it was only for a hearty laugh, and as the youngest you both shared a playful nature. Your mother often scolded you for your immaturity, but it did not bother you one bit. Your playful bickering was put to an end by your eldest sister, who had suddenly hushed you.

“Quiet my dear sisters, Mama is telling our Papa of some news,” Sophia said in a low voice as she silently ushered her youngest sisters to come towards her and Iris.

“What’s going on?” Jessie inquired as she noticed her sisters crammed at the entrance to their father’s study. The four sisters silently ushered her to come to them. Immediately, Iris filled her in with what was going on.

“A Mr. Kim and his brother have established a living Netherfield Park,” she whispered excitably. “And both are single!”

“How many pounds? How many pounds?” you and Tina asked simultaneously, curious about the newest bachelors in town.

“5,000 pounds a year!”

This caused all five girls to cause a commotion outside the door, capturing their father’s attention, who opened it to acknowledge their presence. A stern look was etched on his features, but the girls still were lowly gigling as they bowed to acknowledge their parents’ presence. Their mother only sighed, but took no note of their daughters’ eavesdropping. She, like her daughters, were more interested in their father’s response to the situation, which must be dealt with urgently. It vexed her that Mr. Bennet had not even taken the slightest interest in the conversation she had struck with him.

“I do not understand why we must partake in this conversation, my dear,” Mr. Bennet grumbled as he made his way to the drawing room, with all six women in his life trailing behind him.

“Oh Mr. Bennet! You must call upon these gentlemen for the sake of our daughters! Surely you must know what I am referring to? At least one of them must be engaged with these gentlemen!”

“Indeed, Mrs. Bennet. But there is no need. I already called upon the two gentlemen,” replied her husband with a smug grin on his face as the girls cheered and thanked their father, immediately talking amongst themselves.

“Oh, Mr. Bennet, how could you? Have you no compassion for my poor nerves?” Mrs. Bennet regarded with a huff.

Mr. Bennet sighed at his wife’s usual, overdramatic remarks and replied simply with: “Indeed I do have compassion for your poor nerves, as they have been my constant companion for these past twenty years.”

The witty response caused the girls to giggle in amusement and all at once they began bombarding him with questions about the two gentlemen.

“Are they handsome?” Iris questioned. “Are they amiable?”

“Are they going to the ball?” Tina suddenly asked, stirring anticipation amongst the women.

“Papa, please tell,” you begged, knowing you can always get it your way with him. He had a soft spot for you, for you were the most similar to him in not only looks but in personality as well.

“They are amiable,” noted Mr. Bennet, “and quite the handsome gentlemen too. There is an elder Mr. Seokjin Kim, and a younger Mr. Taehyung Kim. They are currently living with their sister, Ms. Caroline Kim as well, and there have been speculations of a third gentlemen, their cousin supposedly. I have no problem with letting either of the two choosing whichever daughter they please.”

This caused the girls to heighten the volume and pitch of their conversations, and once again did Tina have to ask her question. “Papa, are they going to the ball at Mr. Jeon’s tonight?”

As if to drag on the suspense of the situation, Mr. Bennet kept a straight face before breaking into a soft smile. “I believe so.” He had somewhat regretted his decision to break the news to them, as all six women nearly bursted his eardrums at his announcement. The girls immediately made many changes to their outfits for the night, for it was not often for such an opportunity to come into their lives.

~

“You’ve been quiet all day, Kyra.”

You snapped from your gaze from the mirror and turned towards Sophia, who was doing your hair. Your lips shaped into an expression of uncertainty as you adjusted your slouched posture. “What good does it do to us competing for two men? You’re lucky you do not have to squabble for a man no longer. Jungkook is perfect for you.”

“There is a possibility of three men, might I remind you,” Sophia assured her younger sibling. “Do not lose hope, Kyra. You’ll find your man some day.”

“Only a fool would believe I would chase after him, and a fool would also believe they could win me over easily,” you murmured.

“Besides, you do not have to be burdened of finding a husband if one of us marries rich. And do not forget, if all goes well with the Mr. Kims, we will have connections with others with a high class status.”

At that thought you smiled and Sophia kissed the top of her sister’s head. “You’re so silly, you know that?” Sophia whispered. “Do not fret. I’ll experiment with a new hairstyle on you. You’ll be sure to charm all the men at the ball.”

Your gaze softened at your sister’s actions and thanked her as she continued to work magic with your hair. If none of the men wished to bother with you, you knew that tonight you at least had Yoonji Min to keep you company. She was your closest friend in a similar situation as yours. She was older by a few years. You were to be twenty-one this year, while she was to be twenty-five. You both shared similar personalities and tastes, and during the balls your favorite pastime was observing the crowds of people and soaking in whatever gossip you could find, thanks to Tina’s associations.

In a couple of hours, they had arrived at the Jeons’ estate. Mr. Bennet has claimed he was too exhausted to participate in any social activity, so he stayed home. Lucky him, you thought to yourself bitterly. But you could not let your sister’s efforts go to waste. It was not your best outfit, but it was enough to leave an impression. The inspiration behind the outfit was to have the appeal of a butterfly in the spring. Hopefully it would be effective for the night, or at least result in pleasurable company.

Like any other party they had ever been to, Meryton Hall was bustling with locals, who were already dancing. Iris and Sophia were quick to the dance floor as usual, as Sophia had quickly found the Jeon heir and due to Iris’ quickness on her feet. It usually took some time before the other three girls were asked out to dance, so they found Yoonji and began to converse about the special guests for the party tonight. 

“I heard of the three Kims. Is that whom you are referring to?” Yoonji asked the three of them as they all nodded eagerly. “I am surprised. They are of such a high status... I wonder why they would bother being at this commoners’ ball.”

“We all know that these balls are much better than the pristine ones held in mansions. Much more goes on, and the people are friendlier,” Tina remarked as she took a swig of her champagne. 

Jessie nodded as she took a sip of her drink. “This is a more preferable and comfortable setting. I am sure those boys would like to explore something new for a change, regardless of their status. After all, they are people too.”

“I have very little information about them, but I overheard some conversation between my family and Sir Jeon,” Yoonji proffered, sitting up in her chair.

“Oh yes, please tell us,” Tina said immediately.

“Do you find them interesting at all? Or are they just rich?” you asked Yoonji, whose typically stone-faced demeanor was replaced with a grin.

“Kyra, it is unwise to judge them based off their wealth,” Jessie advised her as she adjusted her glasses.

“But remember, my dear sister, we are only having this conversation because we need that wealth.”

“I have heard the eldest Mr. Kim is one of the most amiable men that people have ever come across. A classic gentleman, who will undoubtedly have all the ladies in the room fawning over him,” Yoonji told them as she thought of other details to relay. “They describe him as very princely. His younger brother is of the same reputation, though he is thought to be less sociably inclined. The younger Mr. Kim is not a hermit, however, and actually is said to have a better sense of humor than his brother, whose humor is noted to be old-fashioned. In terms of wealth, both are equally rich, as they inherit 5,000 pounds a year, which I am sure you have heard by now.”

“At least they have personality,” you said with a grin. “I trust Papa’s opinion of them being handsome. They cannot be worse than some of the men here. Look at these humorless poppycocks. If none of them fall in love with you Yoonji and the rest of my single sisters, then I have no more to say on others’ opinion of beauty.” You brought up a fair point. The other men in the ballroom were ghastly looking, but they were scarce in comparison to the amount of women, therefore regardless you would end up dancing with each common buffoon out there. They would try to hit on you and your sisters, but you knew better than to play around with people not worth your time.

“Kyra, one day you’ll find someone who will catch your eye and then you’ll have to watch your tongue,” Tina remarked, drawing a scoff from you.

Before you could protest, the room suddenly fell silent as the crowd parted for the four guests. So there was another after all, you pondered. The four individuals all had quite a presence, you had to admit. The individual who stood out amongst the rest was the only blond individual, who happened to be the tallest too. While the two handsome dark-haired gentlemen she assumed were the Kim brothers, this man was expressionless and looked absolutely miserable.

“Okay, now who is who?” you whispered to Yoonji as Jessie and Tina focused more on trying to get a proper look at the long awaited guests.

“Mr. Seokjin Kim, the eldest brother, is the one with the elegant eucalyptus leaves on his suit. The taller dark haired male. His younger brother Mr. Taehyung Kim is on the right, whose suit is decorated in the white flowers. Of course, the only female among them is their only sister, Ms. Caroline Kim, and the man who looks and acts like their own personal guard is Mr. Namjoon Kim, their cousin.”

“The one with the quizzical brow?” you asked as Yoonji nodded. “He looks as miserable as me, poor soul.”

“He may be miserable, but he is anything but poor. Those four come from the same family, but Mr. Namjoon Kim is worth 10,000 a year.”

“10,000?!” the three sisters exclaimed in hushed tones.

“And he owns half of Derbyshire, in a beautiful estate known as Pemberly,” Yoonji related as Sir Jeon began to walk them through the crowd.

“The miserable half?” Your comment caused your own self and Yoonji to snort in disbelief at the rich man. Everyone had their eyes on these four individuals, but closely payed attention to the blond Kim upon the spread knowledge of his wealth.

You had come to meet Mr. Seokjin Kim as an amiable and charming individual. He was a flirt and reminded you of a cliché protagonist in the stories you had read. He was also a great dancer you found out quickly. It was no wonder why he drew in so many women. He also was a personable and casual gentleman and fit perfectly within the setting. He made sure you used no formalities when around him, which made you see Seokjin more as a friend than a stranger. You especially gained his respect when you saw the way he admired Jessie from afar and scouted her out, rather than she chase after him. The two of them engaged for the rest of the night, and you shared her pleasure.

The younger Mr. Kim was equally amiable and handsome, and you noticed the accuracy of Yoonji’s information when you found yourself in his company. The younger Mr. Kim was a quieter individual, but when he struck up a conversation with Tina, the two were inseparable. You too shared Tina’s happiness when you realized that not only the elder Mr. Kim, but the younger too took an interest in one of your sisters.

You did not engage at all with Ms. Kim, but found yourself in an amusing situation regarding Mr. Namjoon Kim.

You had not been involved with him directly. You were tired from the endless dancing, and seeing as there were not enough partners, you sat down and observed the dance from afar. You watched in amusement Yoonji attempted to dance with an ill-mannered companion as you took a sip of your champagne. It was then when you noticed Seokjin step out of the dance and approach his cousin, who had only engaged in one dance with Ms. Kim. The two were only a table away within your vision, so you were able to clearly hear their conversation from where you were sitting.

“My dear cousin, I cannot have you standing around in this stupid manner! Namjoon, you must get up and dance. There are plenty of women to go around, and I have never been in the company of such beautiful women in my life.”

“You and Taehyung are in the company of the only pretty women in the room,” the blond noted, fixing his gaze on Jessie and then to Tina.

“Nonsense!” Seokjin exclaimed as he slapped his cousin’s back, causing him to wince. “Look, Namjoon, over there! She’s a rather beautiful creature as well, is she not?” It took you a moment to realize Seokjin was referring to you. “That’s one of Jessie’s sisters. I shall have my partner introduce you two.”

You had unintentionally made eye contact with Namjoon’s cool ones. The intimidating glare he gave off created tension in the air as you turned away. For the first time that night, you heard him speak with any ounce of emotion. “She is tolerable, I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me. It is useless to waste your time on me, Seokjin. Go find your partner and enjoy her smiles.” He walked off with an air of pride, leaving Seokjin frustrated and flabbergasted. There was nothing Seokjin could do, so putting on a smile, he went back to be in Jessie’s company.

Unbelievable. It was utterly unbelievable the way he spoke about you. Well, it could not be bothered if he did not want anything to do with you. In fact, you were becoming amused by the whole situation. You were itching to tell him off right on the spot, but that would make you as proper as he was. You could just bite your thumb at him, but what would that do? Instead, it ended up being quite a humorous discussion amongst your family and friends. It was vexing, but there was nothing you could do about it. You were just going to keep your head up high and find another man or woman worth your time. Yet you could not keep your eyes off that handsome man...

~

You and Tina shared the same room, as the two of you were the youngest. You were not sure if Tina was drunk or not, but her face was stained bright red and completely enamoured.

“He was just what a young man ought to be,” Tina sighed contently under the sheets. “He’s sensible, good-humored, lively. He had such happy manners, Kyra, something I have never seen before in my life. Of such good breeding too!”

“On top of all of that Teeny, he’s handsome. His character is therefore complete,” you stated confidently, pinching her cheek. Tina slapped your hand away and groaned.

“Do not call me that, dear sister,” she whined. “I’m not a child anymore. Unless in return you wish me to call you Kiwi.”

You scoffed and pinched her cheek lightly, and she mimicked the action. “You will always be a baby to me. You are the family’s baby. You will be stuck being called by your baby name at intimate family gatherings as long as we are stuck in this household.”

Tina raised her eyebrow and smirked at you. “Not if I get married before you.”

“Ouch, a real shocker!” You put your fist to your heart for a dramatic effect as you both giggled.

“I do not understand though why Mr. Kim would make such a tiring effort to put up with me.”

“You do not understand, but I do,” you argued. “If I were half as beautiful or humorous as you, Tina, I would not be as oblivious to why Mr. Kim took interest in you that night. You were ten times prettier than all the women in that room. I would think him a fool if he had not taken interest in you.”

“Thank you Kyra, but I think all the men were fools to not ask you to dance.”

You only adjusted your position in the bed by slightly curling in a ball with a sigh. It had somewhat bothered you that after the whole Mr. Kim incident that not a single person had asked you to dance that night. It could not be bothered due to the lack of men in the room, but you still felt slightly offended and irritated by the matter. “It might help if they realized I was a tolerable partner.”

Tina knew you well enough that your sarcastic remark covered your frustrated state. You both sought to ignore and downplay your feelings, which both of you understood about each other. “I did not know the comment affected you that much. I should have been there for you. You should know you are always welcome in the company of me, regardless of whom my partner is. Do not set on solitude, my dear sister. It is not right when you have four other sisters.”

You only grinned in response to her remark. “False. I enjoyed the solitude, and I spent my time making out this Mr. Kim’s character. What a cousin! To think I will be related to such a creature in some shape or form is a horrid revelation, yet unfathomable. You and Jessie are already so deeply in love with those brothers, as they most definitely are for you. You must unfortunately have to put up with him. But do not let my feelings and vexations restrain you or Jessie from your romantic adventures.”

Tina took your hand into hers and brought it up to kiss it. This was something you both did whenever you quarreled or were bothered by something. It was an action that soothed both of you. You did not need the gesture, though you welcomed it, as it expressed your sister’s worries and love for you. “One man should not dampen your spirits. There will be the militia coming to town in only a fortnight. Did you not hear Iris announce it?”

“Of course I did, but you do not understand, Teeny. Only the deepest love will persuade me into matrimony, which is why I will die an old maid. I will not settle, Teeny. Never.”

[lastmayqueen]

#pride and prejudice#I’ve always loved his character because he IS funny and he is iconic!!! and his love for Lizzy is touching!#he’s not faking it.#but he is so flawed. a man of taste a man of ability a man of judgment.#a man who could and SHOULD have set a different tone for his children and chose not to!#and they SUFFER FOR IT#their house is a divided one. and every child feels the pain of living in a house where the parents neither respect each other#nor are on the same team#there is a crack running through their house for this reason and it’s how Lydia (and Kitty) came to be so neglected!#who is going to discipline them or guide them? certainly not Mr. Bennet!#he’s so important to teach too. because the boys LOVE HIM. of course!#and are always very struck by his failures and laziness once I point it out#and yeah Darcy one of the only people who can expose him. because Darcy is putting in the work a man should be doing#Darcy’s house IS in order. his love is active and protective. he is fulfilling his role!#Mr. Bennet’s gifts are so extraordinary—the wit. the insight into human nature. honestly the capacity for wisdom#but he likes his library. he likes enjoying himself more than he likes doing his duty#as either a father or a husband#he does fail Mrs. Bennet! I have compassion for her there#anyway I love to think about this: something no version I have ever seen has ever fully explored#but man is it on the page#yeah yeah sorry for all the words. teacher off duty etc.

I need these tags

one of the things that continues to strike me on reread is how much the character of Darcy, and Austen through him, finds Mr. Bennet dead. And how much Elizabeth, in growing and changing and discarding her past blindness, has to move past her way of seeing her father and thus of seeing reality, because the two are connected! Darcy’s letter exposes her father’s flaws to Elizabeth in a way she’d never been able to see before. Most especially the way his laziness and neglect of his own gifts have hurt his family and that ultimately he doesn’t. care. Not enough to change. It literally says that she comes home from Hunsford and tries to laugh at her sisters’ and mother’s folly (the way she used to; the way her father has taught her to by example for her whole life) and she can’t anymore! It sticks in her throat. She is grieved by the failures that she sees in him, all the more so because she IS his favorite and she loves him! And the thing about Mr. Bennet is he never changes. The Lydia/wickham situation exposes to him sharply his own conduct and the consequences and he feels it! Because he is neither stupid nor unfeeling. But he, like everyone, has free will. And he chooses not to change when the opportunity presents itself. He even jokes about how quickly his feeling bad will pass and how soon everything will go back to normal, to his laziness and his selfishness. He is set in his ways and he serves as a contrast to Elizabeth’s personal journey because he embodies a version of a person she could have become and was in danger of becoming if her only goal at all times was to laugh at and judge people from the sidelines.