#he did beat me sometimes. just not in a very... traditional way? i guess?

[yvaineseleneposts]

Brother's best friend

A/N: Sometimes I know where I want the story to go but I cannot really start the story. So I am very sorry for the weird beginning...

Requested: no

Pairing: Nico Hischier x Reader

Words: 9k

Warning(s): none

It started with laughter from the basement.

I was home for winter break, curled up on the couch with a book and a blanket, when I heard my brother’s unmistakable voice. It was followed by another, deeper one—smooth, with a Swiss accent that never quite disappeared.

Nico.

My brother’s best friend. New Jersey Devils’ golden boy. And the boy I told myself I’d never fall for.

He had been around for years—quiet, respectful, funny in a dry sort of way. He always smiled at me in that polite, friendly way guys smile at their best friend’s little sister. And that’s all I was. The sister. The one who had braces for too long, who stole the remote, who tagged along to dinners when our parents forced him to include me.

But somewhere along the way, I grew up. And so did he.

He walked into the kitchen that night like he owned it, hair slightly damp from the snow, Devils hoodie slung low on his hips. He smiled when he saw me.

"Hey," he said. Just that. Simple. Like it didn’t flip my stomach every time.

"Hey, Nico."

“You’re home.”

“Yeah. College is off for the holidays.”

He opened the fridge like it was his. It always had been, really. He’d been eating our leftovers since he was sixteen.

"You want tea?" he asked, already boiling water. That was Nico. Kind without asking why.

I nodded, and we stood in silence for a beat. Not awkward. Just full.

My brother came in then, joking about some guy from high school who still hadn’t moved out of his mom’s basement. I laughed, but I watched Nico more. And he noticed.

Later that night, I was brushing snow off my jacket by the door when I heard the creak of footsteps behind me. I turned—and there he was. Nico, jacket half-zipped, cheeks flushed from the cold.

"You heading out?" I asked, trying to sound normal. Just normal.

"Yeah," he said. "Got practice in the morning."

I nodded, tightening my grip on the doorknob like it would ground me. “Don’t let my brother drag you into another midnight NHL binge-watch.”

He grinned, that crooked, easy grin that undid me every time. “He already tried. Told him I needed sleep. He accused me of getting old.”

I laughed softly. “He’s not wrong.”

Nico smiled, then looked at me—really looked. “You’re different this year.”

My heart paused. “Different?”

“Yeah.” He shrugged. “College suits you, I guess. You seem… older.”

“Time does that,” I said, my voice lighter than I felt.

He gave a small nod, like he wasn’t sure what else to say. Then, he reached out and gave my shoulder a brief, friendly squeeze. The kind of touch that meant nothing and everything.

"Goodnight, kiddo."

Kiddo. That stupid nickname he hadn’t used since high school. It landed like a stone in my chest.

“Goodnight, Nico.”

He left without looking back.

The door clicked shut, and the quiet came rushing in. I stood there in the dim hallway, jacket still in hand, heart a little heavier than before.

He didn’t know.

Of course he didn’t. Why would he? I had become a master of hiding it—smiling too casually, looking away too fast, pretending his touch didn’t burn through my sweater sleeves.

He still saw me as his best friend’s little sister. And I had no idea how much longer I could stand it.

The cabin was already warm by the time we arrived, logs crackling in the fireplace, the smell of pine and cinnamon filling the air. My parents were unpacking in the master bedroom. My brother was already knee-deep in a snowball war with our younger cousins. And me? I was pacing by the window like a girl waiting for something she swore she didn’t care about.

Nico was supposed to arrive today. He and his family had been coming to this ski lodge with us every winter since we were kids. It was tradition. Familiar. Safe.

And yet, this year, I felt anything but.

I kept checking the driveway. Every time headlights passed down the snow-dusted road, my pulse jumped. Every sound outside made me glance up. I’d even redone my braid—twice.

Pathetic.

“Someone’s antsy,” my brother teased as he passed through the kitchen. “You gonna throw yourself into the snow when Nico gets here?”

I rolled my eyes, too practiced to flinch. “Please. I’m just excited to beat you at Monopoly later.”

But inside? Inside I was a storm. Because no matter how hard I tried to shove my feelings down, they kept rising. Swelling. Tightening like a scarf too snug.

When the knock finally came at the door, my stomach turned over. I rushed to open it before anyone else could.

And then I froze.

There he was—Nico—his hair tousled under a beanie, cheeks flushed from the cold, grinning that easy grin.

But he wasn’t alone.

She stood beside him, wrapped in a perfect cream coat, sleek brown hair tucked behind her ears, boots too clean to have touched a snowbank. Her arm brushed his, her smile soft, confident. Like she belonged there.

“Hey!” Nico said, stepping forward. “Long drive, but—made it.”

I swallowed. “Hey. You’re here.”

He turned slightly. “This is Clara. She’s… uh, she came with me.”

Clara. Of course she had a name like that. Light and graceful and elegant in a way I never was.

“Nice to meet you,” she said, reaching out with a gloved hand. Her voice was honey and warmth.

“You too,” I said, somehow smiling even as the words cut my tongue on the way out.

My brother came barreling past me, pulling Nico into a one-armed hug. The mood shifted, laughter rising, bags being hauled inside, introductions being made. The energy buzzed around me like static, but I couldn’t move. I stood rooted in the foyer, watching the way she leaned into Nico’s side like she’d done it a hundred times before.

And the worst part?

He let her.

That night, while everyone played cards and passed around mugs of mulled wine, I sat in the corner chair, nursing hot chocolate that had gone cold. Watching Nico laugh at something Clara whispered in his ear.

He didn’t look at me once.

But I couldn’t stop looking at him.

He still didn’t know. And now, maybe he never would.

____

They were heading into the city—Nico, Clara, my brother, a couple of their mutual friends who had driven up for the weekend. There was talk of a club, a new place with velvet walls and overpriced cocktails. Laughter echoed down the hallway as they pulled on jackets, sprayed perfume, laced boots.

I lingered in the kitchen, hoping someone might say, You coming?

But the question never came.

Instead, Clara turned to me with a too-bright smile. “We’ll probably be back late. Don’t wait up.”

“Yeah,” my brother added, barely glancing up from his phone. “You’re not really a club person, right?”

I nodded like it didn’t sting. “Right. Have fun.”

The door closed behind them. Silence settled.

I ended up in the den, cross-legged on the carpet with our parents, playing card games and half-listening to stories I’d heard a dozen times. I smiled and laughed when I was supposed to, but it all felt muted. Distant. Like watching someone else’s life through a frosted window.

Eventually, the adults drifted off to bed, the house quiet again, save for the soft creaks of wood settling in the cold.

I stayed downstairs.

Curled into the corner of the couch with an old blanket and a book I couldn’t focus on. The words blurred as I kept glancing at the clock.

12:41 AM.

1:09 AM.

At 1:42 AM, the front door creaked open.

I heard them before I saw them—tipsy laughter, the clumsy shuffle of boots on hardwood. My brother first, grumbling about the cold and heading straight upstairs. Then Clara, giggling as Nico tried to unzip her coat, both of them flushed and close.

“Shhh,” she laughed, swatting at him. “You’re going to wake everyone.”

He murmured something back in Swiss German, low and soft, and she pulled him into her, hands tangled in the collar of his jacket.

I froze.

They hadn’t seen me yet—tucked in the corner of the dark living room. I could’ve said something. Cleared my throat. Let them know I was still awake.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I sat there, the book limp in my lap, watching the boy I loved wrap his arms around someone else.

She kissed him. Long and slow. And he kissed her back, hands gentle at her waist like they’d done this a thousand times. Familiar. Easy.

They whispered something I couldn’t hear, then stumbled upstairs together, laughing all the way.

When the silence returned, it was deeper than before.

I looked down at the book in my hands—half-read, forgotten. The words were still blurred, but this time, it was from something hot and heavy burning in the back of my eyes.

It hit me then—not just the jealousy or the sadness, but the space between us. The years. The life experience. The way they belonged in that world, and I was still here in mine.

____

The cabin looked like a postcard. Strings of lights framed the windows, candles flickered on the mantel, and snow drifted lazily outside like it had nowhere better to be.

Inside, everyone was dressed up for New Year’s Eve. Clara wore a deep red dress that made her look like she belonged in a magazine. My brother had on a pressed shirt and an old gold party hat. Nico—he wore black. All black. His sleeves rolled up, collar open, wristwatch catching the light.

And I?

I wore a smile that didn’t quite reach my eyes.

It was the kind of night I used to look forward to. Champagne, cheesy countdowns, the glow of a fireplace and the people I loved around me. But this year, I felt like a prop in the background of someone else’s story. Like I was just… there.

They all played games, passed drinks, told stories from the past year. I sat beside them, nodding, laughing at the right moments, but something was slipping. I could feel it. I didn’t want to be bitter. I didn’t want to be that girl.

But when Clara leaned into Nico and whispered something in his ear, and he grinned like it was the best thing he’d heard all night, I looked away so fast my neck ached.

Around 11:40, I stepped out onto the back porch, away from the heat, away from the noise. The snow was still falling, soft and steady. I pulled my coat tighter and let the cold bite my cheeks. It felt… better. Real.

The door creaked behind me. Footsteps. I didn’t have to turn to know who it was.

“You okay?” Nico’s voice was quiet, almost hesitant.

I forced a smile and glanced at him. “Yeah. Just needed some air.”

He stepped beside me, close enough that I could feel the heat of him. We stared out into the trees, lit faintly by the lights inside.

“You’ve been kind of... quiet,” he said.

I shrugged. “I guess I’ve had a lot on my mind.”

He studied me. I could feel it, even though I didn’t look at him. “Anything you want to talk about?”

Yes. You. Her. Me.

“No,” I said. “It’s nothing, really.”

He didn’t press. He just nodded slowly and looked back at the snow.

But I could tell he wasn’t convinced.

“You’re not mad at me, are you?” he asked suddenly.

That caught me off guard. I looked up at him then—really looked. His brow was furrowed, eyes uncertain. Vulnerable, even.

“No,” I said, quietly. “Of course not.”

He let out a breath, his shoulders easing. “Okay. Just… wanted to make sure.”

I nodded, then turned back toward the trees.

It was almost midnight. I could hear the countdown beginning inside.

“…10…9…”

“Happy New Year,” he said gently.

“Happy New Year,” I echoed.

And then he was gone—back inside, back to her. Back to everything I couldn’t say.

I stayed out there a little longer, the muffled cheer from inside slipping through the windowpanes, the sound of a kiss I didn’t see echoing in my chest like a missed note.

____

The heat in Spain was different.

It clung to your skin, slow and syrupy, curling into your clothes and hair until it felt like you were wearing sunlight. The villa our parents had rented sat on the edge of a quiet coast, white stone walls and terracotta tiles, lemon trees blooming by the pool. It was beautiful. Picturesque.

And I didn’t want to be here.

Not because of Spain. Not because of the sea or the food or the lazy afternoons where cicadas hummed like background music. But because I knew who else would be here.

Nico.

It had been six months since New Year’s.

Six months since I’d watched him kiss someone else.

Six months since I’d promised myself I was over it.

I hadn’t seen him since. I buried myself in coursework. Internships. Projects. Friends who didn’t know his name. And it helped—kind of. The sharp edge of it dulled. The ache faded into a quiet kind of ache, one I could live with. Mostly.

Until now.

I arrived at the villa first. My parents were already relaxing by the pool, wine in hand, sunglasses on. His family was due that afternoon. I told myself I didn’t care. That I wouldn’t look for him. That it didn’t matter who he brought with him this time.

But when the front gate creaked open around sunset, I still peeked through the slats of the balcony shutters.

It was him.

No Clara.

Just him.

He looked the same, but also different. Tanned. Relaxed. His hair longer, pushed back from his face. A canvas bag slung over one shoulder, sunglasses tucked into the collar of his shirt. He was laughing at something my brother said as they hauled luggage up the stone steps.

I didn’t go down to greet them.

Instead, I waited until dinner was already underway, then slipped into a seat on the far side of the long table. I smiled when I needed to, passed bread, nodded when someone brought up university. But I didn’t look at him. Not once.

Not until I had to.

“Hey,” Nico said softly, leaning toward me as our parents dove into a story about the last time they'd been to this town.

“Hey,” I said, keeping my eyes on my plate.

He tilted his head, like he was trying to catch my eye. “Been a while.”

“Yeah. School’s been… intense.”

“You disappeared,” he said. There was no accusation in his tone—just curiosity. And something quieter. Wary.

I shrugged. “Life gets busy.”

He studied me for a moment. “You look different.”

“Spain’ll do that.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

I finally met his gaze. His eyes were searching. Familiar. Still brown and soft and too kind. I didn’t like what they made me feel.

So I smiled—polite, distant. The kind of smile people give to old classmates they don’t really want to reconnect with.

“Well,” I said, reaching for the wine, “cheers to reunions.”

He clinked his glass against mine, his eyes never leaving my face.

But I looked away again, pretending not to notice the way his smile faltered. Pretending not to feel the questions he wasn’t asking.

And for the rest of the night, I made sure to keep a safe, sunlit distance.

____

The night air in Spain was thick with music.

Laughter spilled from open doors. Streetlights buzzed faintly above cobblestone roads. Somewhere in the distance, someone was playing guitar, badly, and it somehow made everything better.

I hadn’t planned to go out.

They had asked — my brother, Nico, some of the locals they’d met at the beach. Tapas, maybe a rooftop bar, some dancing. I'd made excuses. Homework. Headache. Something that sounded reasonable enough to hide the real reason: I didn’t want to spend another night watching Nico be charming under dim lights.

But when Nico had stopped at the door and looked back, eyebrows raised, and said, “Come on — you need this,” something in me cracked. I grabbed my bag and followed them into the warm Spanish night.

And it was fun. At first.

Sangria in glass pitchers. A rooftop with views of the dark ocean. String lights over the terrace, laughter rising into the stars. I danced with strangers, let the rhythm pull me out of my head, smiled until I forgot why I didn’t want to come.

But then I had one more drink than I should have. And another.

And suddenly everything was too bright, too warm, too Nico.

He’d been beside me for most of the night — teasing me gently about my moves, offering sips of his drink, making sure I had water. He was always like that. Kind. Attentive. And totally, infuriatingly unaware.

We ended up leaning against a stone wall near the beach just after midnight, a little away from the rest of the group. The waves crashed nearby. His arm brushed mine.

“You okay?” he asked, voice low.

“Fine,” I said. Then laughed. “A little more than fine, maybe.”

He smiled. “You’ve been different lately.”

“That a bad thing?”

“No. Just… different.”

I didn’t say anything.

“I missed you,” he added, almost hesitant. “You just vanished after the holidays. I get it if school was crazy, but I thought we were friends.”

I turned to him, the alcohol swirling in my chest like smoke.

“That’s the problem,” I said before I could stop myself.

His brow furrowed. “What is?”

“I can’t be your friend.”

The words dropped like stones between us. Heavy. Loud. Irrevocable.

He blinked, trying to make sense of it. “Wait, what—what do you mean?”

But I just shook my head, suddenly dizzy. “Forget it. I shouldn’t’ve said that. I’m—just drunk.”

He reached out, touched my arm gently. “Hey. What’s going on?”

I pulled away, not harshly, but enough. “I can’t do this. Be near you. Laugh with you. Pretend like I’m fine.”

His expression twisted — confused, hurt. “Why?”

I met his eyes for a second too long.

Then looked away.

“I’m going back,” I mumbled, pushing off the wall.

He didn’t stop me. Just stood there, hands clenched at his sides, watching me walk back into the blur of music and strangers.

And I didn’t see the way he kept staring after me.

____

My parent’s had allowed me to have my best friend join us on during our holiday in Spain. Her name was Lila — bright, bold, loud in the best way. She showed up three days after the night out, suitcase in hand, sunglasses on, tossing her arms around me like we hadn’t just last seen each other a few weeks ago back home. The house instantly lit up with her energy. My parents adored her. Her tan lines and oversized beach hats became part of the scenery.

And I clung to her like a life raft.

Because being near Nico had started to feel like drowning in silence.

Since that night, we hadn’t spoken about what I said. He hadn’t asked. I hadn’t offered. But I knew he remembered. I could see it in the way he looked at me sometimes — unsure, like he was trying to read a map in a language he didn’t speak.

The more he watched me, the more I avoided him.

With Lila around, it was easy. She pulled me into plans, took up my time, shielded me with laughter and inside jokes Nico wasn’t part of. We sunbathed by the pool while the others played volleyball. We took photos at the market and wandered through little coastal towns. I only ever saw Nico at meals, where I made sure to sit at the far end of the table, always between Lila and someone else.

But he noticed. I could feel it.

One evening, as everyone got ready for a dinner out, I passed Nico in the hallway. Just the two of us. My breath caught before I even looked up.

He paused. “Hey.”

“Hey,” I said, still walking.

He stepped in front of me before I could slip past.

“Are we okay?” he asked, voice careful. Too careful.

I blinked. “Yeah. Of course.”

“Because it doesn’t feel like it.”

I shrugged. “I’ve just been busy. Lila’s only here for a week.”

He hesitated. “Did I do something wrong?”

I looked up at him then, and it physically hurt to see the confusion in his eyes. The guilt. He was trying. He just didn’t know why it mattered so much.

“No,” I said softly. “You didn’t do anything.”

“Then why won’t you even look at me?”

That nearly broke me.

I shook my head. “I can’t do this now.”

He stepped back, nodding slowly, jaw tightening like he was biting back something sharp. “Okay.” And that was it.

He let me walk past him, and I hated how much I wanted him to follow.

____

The house was quiet, save for the hum of the fridge and the distant sounds of waves crashing against the shore.

I couldn’t sleep.

I’d tried. Tossing and turning, pulling the blanket higher, pushing the pillow into a different shape, but the truth was, I couldn’t escape it. The knot in my stomach, the way my chest tightened every time I saw him — every time he looked at me like I was a puzzle he couldn’t quite figure out.

So I slipped downstairs, hoping the cool night air would clear my head, my mind, even just for a few minutes.

The kitchen was dark except for the soft glow from the streetlights outside, casting long shadows across the counters. I moved quietly, reaching for the water bottle in the fridge, then poured myself a glass.

I was too lost in my own thoughts to hear the footsteps at first.

“Couldn’t sleep either?”

His voice came out of nowhere, making me freeze mid-sip. The glass was cold against my lips. I hadn’t even heard him approach.

I set it down on the counter and slowly turned around.

Nico stood there, leaning against the doorframe, his eyes searching my face like he hadn’t seen me in a hundred years. His shirt was unbuttoned at the collar, sleeves rolled up. The air around him was heavy, thick with tension.

“I didn’t think I’d find you here,” he said softly, but I could hear the hurt in his tone, the way it caught on the edges of the words. “But I was hoping it was you.”

I opened my mouth to say something—anything—but the words caught, stuck somewhere between my throat and my heart. He stepped closer, his eyes never leaving mine.

“Why are you avoiding me?” His voice was barely a whisper, the question coming out like a plea. “What did I do wrong?”

I wanted to back away. To put distance between us. But my feet stayed rooted to the floor. And before I could think, before I could move, he reached out, placing his hand on the counter next to me, trapping me in the space between his body and the marble.

“I don’t get it,” he said, his breath warm against my skin as he leaned in. “I’m your friend, aren’t I? But you won’t even look at me anymore. What changed?”

The way he said it… like he was searching for an answer he couldn’t find, something that had slipped through his fingers and now hovered between us like an unspoken confession.

I swallowed, fighting to keep my voice steady. “Nothing changed.”

“Then why are you so distant?” he pressed, his voice growing more frustrated now, though he was still gentle. “You keep pushing me away, like I’m a stranger. I’m not just some guy, you know?”

I wanted to scream at him. You’re not just some guy. You’re the one I’ve been in love with for years, and it hurts to be near you when you’re in love with someone else.

But instead, I just stared at him.

His hand was still on the counter, his other hand fisted at his side, and he was so close now. Too close. I could feel the warmth of his body, his pulse, the tension in his muscles as if he were holding himself back from something — from me. I couldn’t breathe.

“You’re hurting me,” he said, his voice softer, almost hoarse. “I don’t understand what I did, but you’re hurting me by acting like this.”

I wanted to cry. I wanted to tell him everything, to beg him to understand. To stop pretending that I could just be his friend when my heart was screaming something else entirely. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t let him see how broken I felt.

“I can’t talk about this,” I whispered, the words trembling on my lips.

“Why not?” Nico asked, his voice urgent. “Why can’t you just talk to me? I hate this silence between us.”

I finally looked up at him, and the hurt in his eyes knocked the wind out of me. I felt so selfish. But I couldn’t say it. Not yet.

“Please,” he murmured, his voice raw, the quiet desperation in it making my chest tighten. “I can’t just pretend everything’s okay anymore.”

I closed my eyes for a moment, squeezing them shut as if I could keep the tears from falling. When I opened them again, his face was inches from mine, his breath mingling with mine.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he whispered.

I should’ve said something. Should’ve told him how it hurt to be near him, how I couldn’t keep pretending that I was fine. But I couldn’t. I was afraid that if I opened my mouth, I’d lose the fragile thread holding me together.

So instead, I pulled away, stepping back slightly, breaking the moment.

“I… I’m sorry,” I said, my voice barely a whisper. “I just need some space.”

Nico stared at me, his expression a mix of hurt and confusion, but he didn’t argue. He let me slip past him, retreating into the stillness of the night.

The air in the kitchen was thick with unspoken words, but there was no escaping it anymore. Not for me, not for Nico.

I thought I could walk away, slip past him and retreat back to the distance I’d been keeping. But when I turned to leave, I felt him — his presence at my back like a magnet, pulling me back, stopping me in my tracks.

His hand landed gently on my wrist, just enough to make me pause.

“I’m not letting you go without an answer,” Nico said, his voice calm but insistent. “Not without understanding why.”

I tried to breathe. Tried to steady the wild thudding of my heart. I wanted to run. Wanted to go back to the way things were — where I could pretend I wasn’t completely falling apart inside. But I knew I couldn’t. Not anymore. Not when he was standing there, looking at me like I was the answer to a question he couldn’t solve.

“I can’t keep doing this,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “I can’t keep pretending, Nico.”

He stepped closer, crowding me in the small space of the kitchen. My back pressed against the counter as he closed the distance between us, trapping me in place. My breath hitched, the weight of him so close, the scent of him—his cologne, fresh air, the salt of the ocean—overwhelming.

“What do you mean?” His voice was almost desperate now, low and rough, like he was holding himself together by the thinnest thread.

I swallowed hard, trying to keep my composure, but the words were slipping out faster than I could stop them.

“I can’t do this. I can’t be your friend anymore, Nico,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. “It hurts too much. Watching you with other people. Pretending that everything is okay when it’s not.”

His hand moved from my wrist to the counter beside me, his knuckles pressing against the marble as he leaned in just a little closer.

“Why? What’s going on?” He was searching my face, his gaze so intense I felt exposed, like every hidden part of me was laid bare. “Why does it hurt?”

I closed my eyes, trying to steady my breath. This was the moment. The moment I either ran from everything I felt, or I told him the truth.

I took a step back, trying to gather my courage, but it wasn’t enough to push him away.

“I can’t watch you with Clara,” I said, the words falling out in a rush. “Or anyone else. I can’t pretend that it doesn’t break me inside. I can’t act like we’re just friends when I—when I’ve been in love with you for so long.”

The words were out, and for a moment, there was only silence between us.

I couldn’t look at him, couldn’t meet his gaze. But I felt his eyes on me, waiting, and I knew I couldn’t take it back now.

“You’re in love with me?” His voice cracked, and I felt it in my chest — that raw, vulnerable sound that cut through the air like a knife.

I nodded, my throat tight. “I have been for years.”

He didn’t move. Didn’t say anything at first. I could feel the weight of his silence pressing down on me, and I wanted to hide from it. But he wasn’t letting me go.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Nico finally asked, his voice softer now, but there was still that edge to it — like he was trying to understand something that didn’t make sense.

I met his gaze for the first time since I’d spoken. “I didn’t want to lose you. I thought if I told you, it would ruin everything. I didn’t want to risk our friendship. And I… I didn’t think you’d feel the same way.”

He took a breath, letting it out slowly, like he was processing everything I’d just said. And then he did something that made my heart stop — he reached out, gently cupping my face in his hand, as though I were something fragile.

“God,” he whispered. “I had no idea.”

I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch, feeling the warmth of his hand against my skin. I couldn’t believe this was happening. After all this time, after everything I had kept inside — he was here. And he was listening.

“I’ve been so stupid,” Nico said, his voice thick with regret. “I didn’t see it. All this time, I didn’t realize.”

My chest tightened as I fought to keep my emotions in check, but it was impossible. “It’s not your fault,” I said quietly. “I never gave you the chance to see it. I didn’t want you to.”

He shook his head, a small smile pulling at his lips. “You should’ve told me sooner,” he said softly. “I could’ve made this easier for you.”

“You couldn’t have,” I whispered. “I had to figure it out on my own. I had to realize that I couldn’t keep pretending.”

And then, without thinking, I stepped forward, closing the final gap between us. His hand was still on my face, and I leaned into it, closing my eyes as if that single touch could make everything make sense.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Nico asked, his voice barely above a whisper, as if he was afraid the answer would break something inside him.

I reached up and took his hand, holding it against my cheek for just a moment longer before pulling it away gently. “Because I was scared,” I said. “Scared of losing you. Scared that you’d never feel the same.”

For a long moment, neither of us spoke. Then, finally, Nico took a step back, and I felt a pang of regret at the distance. But then he looked back at me, his eyes softer than I’d ever seen them.

“You’re not going to lose me,” he said quietly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

My heart raced, hope and fear battling inside me. “What does that mean?”

“It means,” Nico began, stepping closer again, his voice steady now, “that I’m not letting you walk away this time. Not without us trying to figure this out. Together.”

I didn’t know if it was a promise or a question, but either way, it was the answer I had been waiting for. And I couldn’t help but smile.

The silence between us had shifted. No longer heavy with the weight of unsaid words, but filled with something else. Something tentative and raw.

Nico was standing in front of me, his gaze searching mine, as if trying to find something — an answer, a sign, something that could assure him this was real, that we were real.

We were real.

I could feel it in the air around us, in the space between us that no longer felt cold and distant. But it wasn’t easy. It wasn’t the kind of confession that magically fixed everything. There was still so much left unspoken, still so much to understand.

I wanted to reach out, wanted to close the gap between us, but the words hung heavy in my throat. The uncertainty wasn’t gone, even if the fear was beginning to fade.

“So, what now?” I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper, unsure how to move forward.

Nico took a deep breath, his gaze softening as he stepped closer again. The warmth of his presence sent a flutter through my chest, but this time it didn’t hurt — it felt like something else entirely, something new.

“I think…” he paused, his lips curving into a small smile, “I think we take it one step at a time. No rushing this. We’ll figure it out, together.”

The simplicity of it took me by surprise. It wasn’t complicated. It wasn’t some grand gesture. It was just him, speaking to me with that same honesty I’d always known him for.

I nodded slowly, feeling the weight in my chest lift, if only a little.

“What happens if I’m still scared?” I asked, my voice barely audible.

Nico’s smile widened, and he reached for my hand. For the first time in a long time, I let him, my fingers intertwining with his.

“Then we take it slow,” he said softly. “No rush. No pressure. We take it however you need it. And if that means we go a little slower, then we do that. But I’m not going anywhere.”

I felt something inside me shift — a kind of relief that I hadn’t even known I’d been waiting for. He wasn’t pushing me. He wasn’t demanding answers or making things difficult. He was giving me space to breathe. To be.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” I whispered, looking up at him, suddenly more vulnerable than I had ever felt. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

“You haven’t,” he reassured me, his thumb brushing the back of my hand gently. “You’ve been hurting in silence, and I couldn’t see it. I’m sorry for that.”

I shook my head, the tears I’d been holding back threatening to spill. “It wasn’t your fault. I didn’t let you see it. I couldn’t.”

Nico’s other hand came up, gently cupping my cheek. He tilted my face upward, and for a long moment, we just stood there, staring at each other. The warmth of his touch was the only thing that felt certain in that moment.

“I know now,” he whispered. “And I’m not going to make you carry this on your own anymore.”

For the first time in a long time, I let myself believe it. I let myself believe that maybe — just maybe — we could make this work.

We stood there in silence for a while longer, and for once, it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was peaceful. Real. The kind of silence that speaks louder than any words ever could.

“Do you think we can be something more than just friends?” I asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

Nico’s eyes softened, and he smiled. “I think we already are.”

And in that moment, everything I’d been holding in — all the fears, the doubts, the uncertainty — melted away.

We didn’t have all the answers. We didn’t know where this was going. But we knew that for once, we were both willing to try.

I took a deep breath, a smile tugging at my lips.

“I think I’d like that,” I whispered, the weight of the words more freeing than I could have imagined.

Nico pulled me closer then, and I let him. For the first time, I didn’t pull away. I let myself feel what I had been too afraid to admit — that this was real. That we were real.

His lips brushed mine, soft and tentative, like a promise. Like something new that we were only just beginning to explore.

The world outside the kitchen still felt uncertain. But for the first time in a long time, standing in his arms, I felt like maybe everything would be okay.

And as I pulled away, just enough to look at him, I knew we had taken the first step.

The days after that night felt like a new beginning. Nico and I still didn’t have all the answers, but everything was different — in the best way possible. We weren’t just friends anymore, but we weren’t rushing into anything either.

We took things slow. And I realized, more and more, that I was grateful for that. The pressure was gone. I didn’t need to force anything to happen. Nico wasn’t asking for anything more than what I could give, and that was exactly what I needed.

But navigating this new dynamic was trickier than I’d imagined.

It was different to look at him and know I wasn’t just seeing my brother’s best friend anymore. I was seeing someone who meant so much more than that. Someone I had silently pined over for years, someone who had become even more important to me than I’d ever realized.

The way he looked at me now was different, too. His eyes no longer carried that same casual warmth that came from years of friendship. There was something deeper there now — an unspoken promise of more, of us, of the future.

But sometimes, that look made me nervous. It felt like I was standing on the edge of something I didn’t fully understand yet.

The first week after our conversation was peaceful, a quiet kind of understanding settling between us. We spent time together with my parents and his, casually hanging out, no pressure. Nico would catch my eye across the table, offering me a soft smile, and I’d return it, feeling the heat rise in my cheeks. We hadn’t talked about anything beyond that first confession — the kiss, the feelings — but there was something unspoken between us that felt more real than any words could express.

But then, one afternoon, as we sat on the balcony overlooking the ocean in Spain, the stillness between us broke.

“You know,” Nico started, breaking the silence as he leaned back in his chair, gazing out at the horizon, “I’ve been thinking a lot about that night.”

I glanced over at him, my stomach tightening. We hadn’t really talked about what had happened since. I didn’t know what he was going to say, but the fact that he was bringing it up meant he had been thinking about it, too.

I nodded, my voice a little unsure. “What about it?”

He turned to look at me, his eyes serious now. “I think… I think I’ve been an idiot.”

I raised an eyebrow, surprised. “What do you mean?”

He ran a hand through his hair, his expression conflicted. “All these years, I didn’t realize how much you meant to me. I kept brushing it off, telling myself that we were just friends. But the truth is, I’ve always cared about you. I’ve always felt something. I just… I didn’t know how to handle it.”

My heart skipped a beat, the words coming out of his mouth echoing in my chest. It felt like everything was coming full circle. But I didn’t know what to say.

I opened my mouth to speak, but Nico stopped me with a raised hand.

“I don’t want to rush this,” he continued, his voice quieter now. “But I just needed you to know that. I needed you to know I’m not just here because I feel sorry for you or because I think I should be. I’m here because I want to be. And I don’t want to let you go. Not again.”

I felt my breath catch in my throat. This was different. This wasn’t the Nico I had known for years. This was the Nico who had finally admitted what he’d been holding inside. The one who wasn’t afraid to be honest with me.

“You’re not going to lose me, Nico,” I whispered, my heart racing as I looked at him. “I just… I don’t know what this means. I don’t know how to be with you in this way.”

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he looked at me with an intensity I hadn’t seen before.

“I think we both need to figure that out,” he said gently. “But I’m willing to try, if you are.”

I felt a rush of warmth spread through me — a mixture of relief and excitement.

“I’m scared,” I admitted, finally voicing the thing that had been lurking in my mind. “I don’t know how to navigate this with you. I’ve spent so long keeping these feelings inside, and now everything feels so... different.”

“I get that,” Nico said softly. “It’s a lot to take in. But I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.”

We sat there in silence for a moment, the weight of his words hanging in the air. The breeze from the ocean ruffled my hair, but I didn’t move. I didn’t want to move. I wanted to stay right there, in that moment, with him.

The next few days were filled with more quiet moments between us — long walks along the beach, quiet dinners with our families, and those stolen glances across the room. We were learning how to be around each other in this new way, navigating the line between friendship and something more.

But the moments that felt the most real were the ones when we didn’t talk. When we just were together — a gentle touch on the arm as we passed each other, the casual way he would smile at me, like we were sharing a secret.

It was the little things. The quiet gestures that made me feel like everything was slowly coming into focus.

One evening, we all went out for a late dinner at a small restaurant along the coast. The atmosphere was warm, and the lights glowed softly against the fading light of the day. As the night went on, our families laughed and talked, but Nico and I stayed on the edges, watching everyone, talking in quiet voices.

“Do you think this is crazy?” I asked him suddenly, a smile tugging at my lips.

He looked over at me, his expression thoughtful. “It feels like a dream, honestly. But I don’t want to wake up from it.”

I laughed softly. “Good. Because I don’t either.”

And for the first time in a long time, I truly believed it. I didn’t know where this was going, and I wasn’t in any rush to figure it out. But for now, I was content to just be here — with Nico. And maybe, just maybe, that was enough.

It felt surreal, almost like I was waiting for something to shatter — some moment when I’d wake up and realize this was all just a fleeting dream. But with each day that passed, the more real it became. Nico and I weren’t just tiptoeing around what we both felt anymore. We were moving forward, slowly, steadily.

The moment we got back home from Spain, everything felt familiar again, the steady hum of life going on as usual. It should’ve felt like we were back to normal, but things between Nico and me were different now.

It was subtle, in the way we exchanged glances, in the way we leaned a little closer when we spoke, in the gentle touches we shared when no one else was looking. But mostly, it was in the way our connection felt stronger, deeper. I didn’t have to question whether Nico was in this with me — I felt it in every word he said, in every smile he gave.

Tonight was supposed to be a low-key evening. Nico had suggested a movie night, but I wasn’t prepared for how different it would feel — just the two of us, lying on the couch, watching a movie, while the world outside seemed so far away.

We started off sitting side by side, just as we had before — the same comfortable silence that had always marked our friendship. But now it felt… different. Every time I shifted slightly, our legs brushed together, and I couldn’t ignore the electric spark that traveled up my spine.

I caught Nico glancing at me out of the corner of his eye, a playful grin pulling at the corners of his lips.

“What?” I asked, raising an eyebrow, though I knew full well why he was looking at me.

He shook his head, his grin widening. “Nothing. Just thinking about how everything’s changed.”

I smiled, trying to keep it light. “Yeah, it’s kind of weird, huh?”

“Yeah,” Nico replied, his voice soft but warm. “But in a good way.”

His words sent a warmth spreading through me, and for a moment, we both just stared at the screen, lost in the quiet of the room. But the silence felt comfortable now. Natural. There was no tension, no awkwardness. Just us, together, sharing a moment.

I shifted again, this time allowing myself to get a little closer, and before I could stop myself, my head had found its way onto his shoulder. Nico tensed for a second but didn’t pull away. Instead, he relaxed into it, his arm slipping around my shoulders, drawing me closer.

“Is this okay?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper, even though I was certain I knew the answer.

He let out a quiet chuckle, his breath warm against my skin. “More than okay.”

We settled into a comfortable silence again, watching the movie, but it was hard to focus on anything else but the way his arm was around me, the way his body was so close to mine, the way he was so completely present. Every small touch, every shift in position felt like something more — something I wasn’t quite ready to admit but couldn’t deny either.

My heart was racing, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to pull away. Nico didn’t rush it. He didn’t try to do anything — he just let me be, letting me get used to the idea of this. Of us.

The movie had long since faded into the background, our attention fully on each other now. Nico’s thumb was tracing small circles on my arm, sending a shiver down my spine with each movement. I could feel his steady breath, warm against my cheek, and the soft pressure of his arm around me that made my chest tighten with something I couldn’t name.

I lifted my head slightly to look at him, and he met my gaze almost immediately, his eyes dark and intense. There was something new in them — something more than just affection. It was the look of someone who was in tune with me, who understood what was happening between us.

“Nico,” I murmured, my voice barely audible, “are we really doing this?”

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he leaned in, his lips brushing against my forehead in a gentle, tender kiss. “I think we already have,” he whispered back, his lips brushing my skin.

I closed my eyes, my heart skipping a beat. Every word he said made it clearer — we were already here. There was no turning back, no more hesitation.

When I opened my eyes again, he was closer, so close that I could feel the warmth of his breath against my lips. For a moment, everything else faded away. There were no doubts, no fears — just the two of us, here, together.

I reached up, my hand finding its way to his cheek, and I pulled him toward me. Nico didn’t hesitate. He kissed me softly, at first, like he was testing the waters, unsure but wanting to be sure.

The world around us seemed to melt away. His lips were warm against mine, gentle but full of promise, and I couldn’t stop myself from leaning into him, deepening the kiss. There was no rush, no urgency — just the quiet, knowing feeling that this was exactly where we were supposed to be.

Nico’s hand slid to the back of my neck, pulling me even closer as our lips moved in sync. My chest tightened, my heart racing as the kiss became more than just a kiss — it became everything we hadn’t said. All the words we had been too scared to speak, all the feelings we had buried under layers of friendship, now unfolding in this one moment.

And when we finally pulled away, breathless and a little dazed, I couldn’t help but smile.

Nico chuckled, his forehead resting against mine. “Well… I guess this movie night just got a little more interesting.”

I laughed softly, my fingers lightly tracing his jaw. “Yeah, I guess so.”

His smile was playful, but there was something more in his eyes. Something deeper. Something that told me we weren’t just two people caught up in a moment. We were building something real, something we both wanted.

The movie was long forgotten. But in that moment, as I lay against him, his arm around me, I couldn’t think of anything else I wanted more.

[gamblersdoll]

𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡, 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐝—

youre just a girl, who should be pampered, but you arent.. at least, not for very long. smut BACKSHOTTTSSSSS, , drug use, heavy angst

you hated how rin knew what to hit, how to hit, and when. it made a heart beat in your clit, going baaadump! baadump! baadump! you hated how he knew how many strokes it took , then pulling out to eat it..

it made your heart throb, feeling his tongue work itself to death and he looked at you through your creamy, frothy folds. it felt like a traditional soul tie, but it felt.. so so good. felt like no other man could make you cream so good.

it also felt like he was your everything, maybe it was just your low ego— feeling like no one could outdo rin. like no other man could ever be better than him. your relationship was like a gift, feeling so secure and loving the small moments and thought rin could give.

“hey baby,” that ‘baby’ hed mumble on the phone after practice, you could hear his relaxed voice when he just laid down. “how was work? any problems?” he was semi interested, but it wasnt noticeable to you at the time.

“twas okay, i guess..” you mumbled, wide awake at eleven pm just for him, to only giggle and play a little of the game. it felt like a dream sometimes, too good to be true and he made you feel like a pretty baby. “would you maybe.. come over? you dont have to.”

the tip of his mushroom dick was steady, always slamming into that gummy spot that made you see stars— slam! slam! slaam!

“rinrinrinnn!” you squealed, patting at his biceps and rolling your eyes, feeling like some bitch in heat the way he pulled your hips back— backshots were his favorite..

“so gah’damned needy..” he mumbled, pressing down the lower of your back to deepen the arch. “your form is so stiff.. do you not please yourself when im gone?” he asked, knowing hed slap your cunny with that heavy hand he used to train.

“nuh— uhhhh!” you moaned, words high pitched and eyes crossing. “jus’ you! swear!”

“mm.. seems like shes telling the truth.” he mumbles, pressing the pad of his thumb to your taint at the end of your slit. “so vocal for me, too.. do you feel no shame in how wet you sound?”

it doesnt take much of anything to get your rocks off, like the greedy girl he knew you were. he could have you riding his knee, and he could get you to ride out your orgasm in a heart beat.

so.. what was your problem? he made somethings feel like a dream, he fucked you when you wanted him to, and he was an upcoming striker, so whats your deal—

the feeling and sound of his phone went off, he pausing all movements to grab it. “hey-“ he hurriedly said, you staring in disbelief that hed answer a little phone call in the middle of your .. session. “yeah, ill be there in ten minutes.” the call ends, and you scoff. “what?”

“you’re seriously leaving me? “ you ask, just to confirm he wasnt playing with your brain, but he only confirmed that with a look of ‘..yeah?’ you felt like you could scream, all sexual feeling leaving your body. “deadass?”

“yes, baby. you know i have practice.”

“you couldnt even come in me before you left? you just dropped everything for that!” you wanted to laugh in disbelief, but who were you to do that? “know what? go, just leave, please.”

“we’ll finish up later.. kay?”

there was never a later, because he dedicated himself to soccer.. and there was your problem—

he never made time for you.

the times he did try and make time were your “dreamy moments,” because he tried to go all out, to make up for months he wasnt there. the feeling of his kisses soothed you, and when he smoked? he was more than a dream.

the smell of cherry leaves and weed filled your lungs, and he stole your breath each second he could. the pads of his fingers digging into plush thighs and a needy hand up your back had you feeling ecstatic. “rin—“

“missed me?” he inquired, a small spank on your thighs. “yeah, you did.” he snickers, kissing down to your collarbone. “got a few minutes before practice.”

“how longgg— oh!” you squeak, feeling his hand squeezing your breast. they were heavy due to ovulation, and so, so tender. “rinnn, please.”

‘rin! where’d you go man?’ one of his teammates called for him, and it left you feeling defeated.

he just.. didnt see you as a priority.

“why havent you been answering my calls?” he just so decided that he could finally get to your place unannounced and ask a question like that. “we havent talked.”

“why would i bother to call? youre always busy.” you fold your arms, groggy since it was like.. twelve at night. “you dont answer any my calls.”

“because im at practice—“

“twenty four hours a day? no breaks?” you cut him off, growing agitated of his shit. why he expected you to answer his calls after maybe eight months of him barely answering your calls. “you dont see me as a priority, you dont see me anymore, you dont call or write. “

“because im trying to be japan’s best striker, the hell did you think of you being a priority?” his words stung, because if it was that serious— why ask you out? why ask you to be his? why even bother with it? “i thought you would understand where im coming from.”

“and i thought youd be able to handle a relationship, but guess not.” you think to yourself. you wanted to argue, but you had work in the morning.

“ill keep trying, im sorry.”

and if that was his ‘try,’ then what the fuck was the attempt or thought process? because his tries were pathetic, the same pace for the last nine months of your relationship. you felt emotionally detached, almost as if you were losing feelings for him— no, thats not it.. you had resentment. you had resentment for rin, for soccer, for rin mainly. it all tied back to him.

he became like a plague to you. you learned very quickly that if you didnt speak to him, youd never speak again probably.

you wanted to scream, but after a few deep breaths, your mind was clear. you wanted to be a decent person to him, you wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. but.. he wasnt acting like he was worth that benefit. you learned that sometimes you want to give them a chance, but that was merely your ego and pride being crushed because you did not care about yourself enough.

so, what else could you do?—

the line rang for maybe six times, rin always had it set to ring ten times for extra time for himself to answer (ironic, aint it?), but answered finally on the ninth ring. “im at practi—“

“it isnt working out, rin.” you cut him off, chewing at the pads of your thumb to cool yourself. the line was silent, but it felt like a suffocating weight on your back and chest. “im sorry.”

“mm, okay, well.” the fuck does he mean ‘okay, well?’ thats all he had to say? “i mean, good luck, i guess.” after a quick farewell, the line was ended, like a steak knife to the heart you wanted to give on a platter to him. but, beggars cant be choosers. It hurt though, because he acted like he didnt care about the fact you just broke up with him.

well, fuck him if he was in a fuck everything mood.

you pondered for hours, why was soccer more important? was it soccer that he was focused on or was it something— no, someone else? you wouldve saw it! you checked everything out, and it only lead to one thing:

he simply didnt see you important enough.

it had been an eternity, or at least thats what you were deluding yourself into. it had only been three months since the break up, yet you felt like it was wrong you were already out there in the dating pool again.

it actually wasnt, since six months out of the nine months that you dated rin you were detached and emotionally gone from the relationship. you had already did everything post break up: cry, eat ben and jerrys, watch a stupid show like greys anatomy or chicago med, and then the physical therapy sessions started— whether it was a new hair color, personality, piercings, or body modifications.

so what the fuck was the harm in dating?

“you deaf or something?” he asked, eyes sniping to you. “i asked if you were okay.”

“sorry! yeah, go ahead.” you offered him to go first in line, forgetting the fact you were in the middle of the store. “im really sorry, completely forgot i was here—“

“should i call someone for you?” it sounded good enough to have you cock back your hand ninety degrees back and come back at fifteen miles per hour. but in actuality, that was a joke.

a year.

a year, he shows up with some pitiful bouquet of flowers, a pity smile and a pitied hope. “hey,” he spoke up, and mainly— buffed a little more. “its been a while.”

“could i help you with something?” you ask, silky robe and you tied it tighter to not let the bits out. “its late, and its cold.. and its been a year.”

“i know, but still.. i figured some things out and—“

“think you runnin’ from it, huh?” a tuff of blonde and pink peak through the door, shidou towering over you and having a hand on your hip from behind. the worst goddamn time, but its technically rins fault. “oh! yer uhhhh..” he snaps his fingers and then points. “yer sae’s little brother, aye?”

rin gawks, the feeling of betrayal and envy. “who’re you?” the somewhat pretty flowers being crumpled and bent. “why are you with him of all people, this cockroach?”

“rin,” you say firm and gentle. “its been a year, i can date who i want , and shidou and i just kinda met..” its only worse that they know each other, you just knew how to pick em, huh? “was there something i can help you with?”

“yeah, being a better striker.”

“listen here—“ rin starts, and you feel shidou start to get heated from behind you, but luckily you were in the middle.

“rin!” you shout, but hes not focused on you, because hes merely angry that youre dating again.. and with a man like shidou. “we’re done, you have a good night rin— shidou, back inside.”

“damn, didnt know you could scream like that..” shidou snickers, leaving a soft smack on your rear. “see you later, loser.”

because why now of all times? why did rin decide now was the time to save you both and get back together? a whole goddamned year! a whole year he decided to wait—

a familiar hoodie walks briefly down the hall, standing briefly until he brings his hood down— sae itoshi, japans best player. “rin.” he nod to him, leaves you a kiss on the head and brushes past you and the door.

“youre fucking joking, right?” rin asked, also hearing shidou grow excited. “my fucking brother?”

“i didnt know he was your brother.” you retort, folding your arms and holding your own. “we met in the store.” because thats what happened, you didnt know they were related.

well…. maybe you did, its the eyes.

“and you still didnt do a .. i dunno, a background check? or even ask me?” he asked, and it catches sae’s attention.

“rin.” he starts, pulling the door wider to show shidou sprawled on the couch, tv lit and he in nothing but a shirt and shorts now. “we’re trying to have a good time, either you talk to my girl nice, or you have a good night.” he knew what pissed rin off, just enough. “ i quite frankly would like for you to have a good night. been wanting to see this movie for a month.”

a month?!

“awe, i thought she was our girl!” shidou perks up, a pouty frown until you wave him off. now wasnt the time.

“just how long were you dating?” rin asked, but sae waved him off. “dont ignore me, big brother!— fuck you!”

almost a year you were his, a year you werent.

and he had one objective for shidou and sae:

destroy, kill, and revenge.

property of gamblerdoll 2025. do not alter, copy, translate, or modify. dividers are not mine. please dm for credit since i lost the account ;-;

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 179 spoilers and thoughts that are like okay i can see where this is going and more below the cut

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i'll get the first thought out of the way rn. i think i do see what they were trying to do now! this ep feels better than the last one!! i'll talk more about that below

right now though i am mostly entertained by HOW MUCH LLOYD LOOKS LIKE A SALESMAN IN THIS EP IN SO MANY PANELS HAHAHAHA

he looks like the

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

the panels in this ep genuinely are really great they're not terribly over the top besides a few and i think thats a good balance,,, i especially like the focus on the chief's reaction to all the changes that are going on in his life now that they have the choice of an alternative method (well,,, choice is said loosely LMFAO)

coming from last episode of lloyd going "oh yeah i love peace im a pacifist :)" to telling the demon kids "hey sometimes. theres people u need to beat up a bit. and people u need to beat up a LOT" and IT MAKES ME SMILE THAT THE KIDS TOOK THAT TO HEART HAHAHA

powerful ass kids. lloyd is teaching the younger generation to Take No Shit and i really like that,,, esp considering all the shit suho had to take in korea asldkjflajskdf

AND THEN WHEN THE VENETOS TRIED TO RAID THE CARRIAGE. HELP

obsessed w the composition of this panel. its nothing like new or clever per se i just really like how it looks , the light that pulls down from lloyd, to javier, to demon guy (I DONT KNOW IF HE HAS A NAME) i just,,, really like. they look like thugs. like bosses u have to fight in a row. ITS FUNNY I LIKE IT. this sequence as a whole was really fun,,,

javier and demon guy explaining that they either piss off or fight, AND THEN LLOYD GOING FROM THE MOST OMINOUS THING YOUVE EVER SEEN TO THE FRIENDLIEST LITTLE SMILE IN THE WORLD. AND OOOH,,, IT'S THE ROUTINE AGAIN,,, HAHAHAHA

like seriously he looks like a fucking car salesman. he's basically selling this whole financing thing he's got planned w the venetos,,,

like when he did the money exchange for goods thing i was like oh,,, he's scheming something with like finances and banking or something like that isn't he,,,,,,, salesman looking ass

ALSO THE NUH UH PANEL FUCKING SENT ME I HAD TO INCLUDE IT HERE

AND WHEN PPODONG KICKS THEM ABOUT AND HE JUST WALKS ON SCREEN AND STANDS THERE IM. the POSE HAHAHAHA you know i had to do it to em lookin ass. GOOFY

genuinely his poses in this ep are so stupid funny i love them sm . recently we've been seeing a lot of his face being Totally Evil Exaggeration or Seriously Going Through It but these goofy ass salesman poses and expressions are SOMETHING ELSE HAHA GOOD CHANGE OF PACE

and it's not like he's forcing their hand he's just stopping their usual avenues, bc he juuust so happens to be working in the area now for magentano,,,, honestly i think he would have put the chief into a corner at some point eventually, but it also seems like lloyd's efforts had also affected other aspects of the chief's life, like his relationship w his family and the other veneto hunters,,, which may have put the chief in the corner early,,, a matter of time, i suppose,,,?

like the chief had a lot of very like remorseful / realization type expressions in this ep, i really liked this one in particular,

and (okay i guess we're diving into the main thoughts now) i think now that i have the context of this ep for the previous week's ep, it kind of paints a picture of what exactly it was the adaptation team was going for. the venetos are prideful and rooted in inconvenient traditional ways, and lloyd's plan is a type of interference that twists that pride one way or another (though i dont think the chief feeling remorse after seeing his wife and child finally being okay with him was a part of lloyds plans LOL)

it,,, makes sense! and while yes it's due to lloyd's interference, it also feels like the chief is making a decision himself here, (in,,, in a way?) (not sure how to explain what i mean by that) like the chief absolutely sees how bad things had gotten under his original policies and outlook, and then saw the immediate change from just... changing the way they acquire goods. i really liked watching that happen, and it helps characterize him as someone who is so incredibly stubborn but really wants the best for his people, and the best he had known at that point was what they had done all this time.

this does makes me wish that ep 178 was handled with a lot more tact and awareness of what they are setting up for. i think if ep 178 had a similar tone as ep 179, it would have been received a bit better, maybe,,, of course i wouldn't know for sure, and i'm not sure how i'd rewrite it myself, but i think 179 handles the line between moments of thought and moments of gags a lot better than 178 (if that makes any sense). because of this, the chief in 179 feels different than the chief in 178,,, i would feel better about 179 showing his redemption process if 178 had been handled with just a bit more care. i don't think we needed to see a man bully/verbally abuse his family to show that the venetos are traditional in a detrimental way,,, while also nearly presenting everyone as a gag at that? man idk,,,

i'm not entirely sure still, maybe i'm just being sensitive or something, but regardless (and again), 179 feels a lot better than 178 so i'm really hoping this arc finishes strong,,,

anyway serious thoughts aside! WHEN LLOYD PULLED OUT THE CONTRACT I KNEW IT WAS OVER LLOYD HAD WON ALDKFJSDFHHAHAAAAA

ohhhh the signing,,, it's binding~ you're stuck now!! HAHA

AND THE REVEAL OF IT BEING LIKE. A FINANCING BANKING THING AFTER ALL I AM BOTH APALLED IN A /LH WAY AND HAPPY BC I FIGURED IT OUT BASED ON WHAT LLOYD WAS DOING HAHAHAHA

like wow. lloyd u r about to toss these people into the throes of capitalism . good job, i think,,,??? honestly it makes sense that lloyd would know how this works or how to do this considering all the financial trouble he faced in korea

NO WONDER HE LOOKED LIKE A SALESMAN IN ALL THESE PANELS TOO. HE'S A BANKER GUY IN THIS EP LAKDJFLSKJDFH god i hate him /aff wonder what his next step in the plan is,,, cause. how will this possibly get the venetos to do the job of keeping charge of the mountain railroad stuff??? like will they be more inclined to work to like pay off the bank stuff? <- does not know how banks and loans work

that's all for now,,, i am excited and hoping the next ep will keep going back up!!!

[an0nfr0mth3d3n]

Ever heard the ‘Foolish and Bad are divorced’ theory? Here’s totally what happened.

Bad probably lost one of his lovers, and it happened to coincide with Foolish losing one of his lovers, and usually what happens is they seek each other out and cry about it (well Bad cries, Foolish makes a bunch of really sad and deprecating jokes because humor is his coping mechanism).

Well when the coincidence happens, they both end up finding each other and just, venting about mortals and how immortality sucks sometimes, until Bad is like, “gosh darn it Foolish I can’t go through this again. Can you just marry me so we can find love together and not get love-trapped by stupid mortals again?”

(I’m aware the words are out of character but if it was in character the amount of dodging and implying would take up several paragraphs and I’m not doing that)

And Foolish laughs and is like “Aaa fuck it. Might as well try I guess, your stupid ass is the only one who doesn’t leave anyways”

It’s very unofficial, they don’t go to a church or anything, and their rings are just mismatched random rings that Bad stole, but they both have weird and mixed feelings about this.

Bad says he’s sure they’ll love each other eventually (I hc him as demiromantic because it’s on the spectrum and because also that’s me too so yippee)

It takes a day or too before Foolish can’t take it any longer. Not only is it too soon, but when he takes a step back from his grief and actually imagines being in a somewhat romantic relationship with Bad, he wants to puke and roll over and die somehow. Also probably had something to do with the fact that Bad started moving in to his current build project and setting up space there and usually it’s not a promising sign for a marriage if you started the day after absolutely strangling your partner.

Bad also realizes this too. The thought of a traditional marriage at ALL has never sounded appealing. He isn’t one to get domestic with it, and despite trying to set up a home with Foolish sounds unappealing (noooo had nothing to do with the current bruises on his neck right now…) Bad lived for adventure, and liked solitude once in a while, and marriage was just a tether that promised no benefits except for tax purposes and he already evades taxes anyways.

They both fight each other to be the once that divorces the other, and they start by making this EVERYONES problem. They never had a traditional wedding, but they DID go to an official divorce court, making it a point to hire the best talent with divorce lawyers out there. Not that there was much to go on, they were only married for a handful of days, and it wasn’t even official so the lawyers have no clue what to do. They go with it anyways because it’s a totem shark and a demon and they are already beating the shit out of each other in the middle of the court, and the lawyers did NOT want to get in the middle of that.

Bad of course tries to weasel his way into getting 50% of Foolish’s build, and Foolish gets impatient with the court and just attacks Bad himself, fed up at the consistent attempts to steal his build.

They both roll around on the ground, biting, kicking, punching, and both of them are smiling through it. They can lean on each other when times get tough, but Landduo will NEVER stoop to petty human traditions ever again.

(whoops this turned into a mini hc fic)

[lazzarella]

Back again with my Wandee Goodday weekly rambling! I will say that, while I'm still adoring it, the editing is starting to feel weird? Like, I know there's not a cut and an uncut version but sometimes it feels like it.

But! I'm also the kind of person who can nitpick something I love to death, so I'm not going to do that because I'm trying to ~ac-cen-tchu-ate the positive as Mr Mercer wrote. And, like, I'm just here to see two beautiful idiots fall in love XD Anyway! Here we go:

- Dee going straight for the necklace! XD

- HAND HOLDING SHOT!!! Will never get enough of those!

- Love that they don't talk >:) (No, really, I'm not being sarcastic lol I love it haha)

- Aww, I want to know what the souvenir is!!

- Love their apologies! I especially love that he said he'd have let Yak beat Ter up if he wasn't a doctor 🤣

- Seriously, though, his apology made sense! I'm totally extrapolating(?) here but I almost feel like he didn't know why he acted the way he did in the moment

- Okay, kissing only once is silly 🤣 but I'm here for silly! And he did say Yak has to learn to wait, which must mean he does plan on kissing him again. At some point. I can just FEEL Kao's long suffering BFF senses tingling however many apartments away haha

- (I weirdly love being frustrated by shows I love??? Just me??)

- Awww! Love the scene with Yak and Yei <33

- Dee didn't feed him?? Tut tut, doctor! Not taking proper care of your boxer guy

- "Let's pound" uh, sure... But right in front of everyone? 🤣

- Lmaooooo, Cher! I love him! Telling Dee the necklace suits him better haha. I love the way that he and Yei have just accepted Dee into the fold and omg they don't know it's "fake" do they??? I would love to see their reactions

- I loved the whole som tam scene

- Hm. I guess Taem *does* like Yak then? Not really keen on that, but I'll just go wherever the show takes me, IDC

- Yak getting horny watching the others get oil massages lmao love that they used that 'o yeah' sound bite

- (actually, there's a bit in one of the songs that sounds like part of O Yeah by Yello)

- but he got his oil massage!! Dee is doing a thorough job

- Ahhh, Yak asking Yei about the consequences of him losing the fight!!! He looks so young there D: and I'm glad Dee asked some stuff, too!

- Okay, but what is UP with the Nazgûl dude???

- Dee knows Yak's lying!!

- ...wait, how does Dee know about the hallucinations to tell Kao? (Is it really a hallucination when you're asleep? Is that not just a dream? I'm guessing this is a translation thing though) Like, I can infer Yak told him at some point, but it feels like a weird choice to not show that. Whatever, I'm not going to think too hard about it

- Boo, Ter!!

- "No because I must bring my special someone" is the best response to Kwan asking if Dee was asking Ter out! Lmaooo (I paraphrased a bit I think)

- Okay, it's so funny that Dee knows Yak is his special someone and that's why he's asking him, and he's happy to let Kwan and Ter and whoever assume that, but he won't tell Yak 🤣

- "Just one more time" ??? One more time for what? Maybe I should stop watching this when it drops because I'm always half asleep by then lol

- Whatever Yak says about it would be nice to have someone cook for him every day and Dee's desperate 'oh pleeeease let it be meeeee' kinda look lol

- Costume time!!! They looked soooo good in the first ones (I don't know if they're specific characters or just traditional)

- I love how grandma describes dancing but I didn't note it down. Oops! It was lovely, though! And very true—you have to be in sync with your dance partner and you have to give and take equally, otherwise it's not going to work and you may hurt yourself or the other person

- Lmao, they're still pretending! So silly after the kiss and I LOVE IT! XD this is what happens when you don't talk. Please keep it up! lolll

- Tbh, I think Dee's equally afraid if he tells Yak how he feels he'll disappear now (he probably has abandonment issues, I get it! He said that thing about presents making him feel like he hadn't been forgotten about a child, so yeah...)

- Product placement time! There hasn't been much though

- Ooh, they're gonna get married :D

- Aww, that was a really sweet proposal!

- Thor is so much bigger than Fluke... Just needed to make a note of that lol

- More product placement!

- Dee! How are you going to feed your boxer man every day when you only have neatly arranged cartons of soy milk and a bowl of apples in your fridge??

- YAY ANOTHER HAIR DRYING SCENE!!! But this time with a hairdryer!!

- I knew Taem would be the reason Yak wasn't at the ball in the previews!

- gee, there aren't many people at the ball

- FUCK. OFF. TER!!

- Yak is going to rock up at the very last second...

- ngl, I thought Taem was into Ohm as well!

- Just say no, Dee! Just say no!

- I mean, that's a pretty good speech, pity who it's coming from lol

- Phew! He pushed him away! I knew he would, but still

- Yesssss! I actually fist pumped at Dee telling Ter he wouldn't be a good dance partner and that HE'S TOO VANILLA bahahahaha

- He was very gracious about it, too, which makes it even better

- Ooh, Ter's crying! Tbh, I'd feel bad for him if he wasn't a manipulative jerk XD he cries pretty, though

- Poor Dr Kwan!

- Dee waiting for Yak is breaking my heart!! Come onnnnn, Yak!

- YES!!! THERE HE IS! Cinderelly, you shall go to the ball! (IDK...)

- "My prince!" (x 2) Ahhhhhh!!!!!!! MY HEART!

- This is the most awkward dance routine lmao I kinda love it

- Ooh! Slow dance time!

- I THINK I LOVE YOU!

- (So what am I so afraid of, I'm afraid that there's no cure for, a love that I'm not sure of... Uh, ahem, where was I?)

- I think my whole heart leapt into my throat!! That was NOT what I was expecting at all and ahhhhhhhhh it was perfect! And Dee's happy little face!!!!! He's so amazed and happy and ahhhhh I don't want to wait seven days to see what happens next!!

-Also was that a new sing playing in that scene or something that already exists? Kinda sounded like Inn singing but idk

- Okay, but I am SO here for Yak trying to woo Dee next week lol like, he so doesn't have to, but I would definitely want to let the handsome man woo me for a little while too XD

- (I bet when Dee says enough and Yak's little face drops, it's going to be when he says the thing about loving Yak for who he is maybe, but IDK, I could be very wrong)

- Anyway. I THINK I LOVE YOU! Yesssss! Yak was so brave!! <333

[unnursvanablog]

I was going to say that it's been a while since I watched a currently airing drama but then I rememberd that I did indeed watch Queen of Tears as it was airing… I was just kinda bored by it.

I picked up Frankly Speaking mostly because it looked cute enough, I liked the leads and I just wanted to have something to watch while I wait for the second part of Bridgerton to be released on netflix. I haven't really been keeping up with new kdrama releases this year, or at least not really been into or interested in many of the shows. I guess that once I managed to cure my reading slump I landed on a kdrama slump. Ether that or the traditional romcom and other types kdramas just have lost their luster for me a bit - but I have also been in this weird limbo lately where I can't really seem to muster up enthusiasm or enjoyment in most things.

I am sure it will pass, and who knows… maybe one of these cute little romcoms that are on the horizon will actually manage to make my cold, dead heart beat and at least allow me to enjoy myself. Although, I must admit to feeling slightly overwhelmed by all these kdrama releases lately.

Frankly Speaking is endearing enough and the first three episodes felt brisk without being overbearing or info dumpy about the characters or their backstory. The whole situations that these people find themselves in are very over-the-top and nonsensical. Them being stuck in a lift or that husband coming and causing the male lead trouble and all all feels quite far-fetched at times or make no sense but it's all just a way to get the plot going for a silly little romcom, so I just shrug or roll my eyes and keep on watching.

I do wish there was a slightly more focus on the female lead and her backstory apposed to the male lead, but that can come with time - although kdramas often forget their female leads in the second half of the show. I do however feel like she is mostly just… there. But her being a single mother? love that!!! (or maybe she took this kid in or something).

I do however tend to enjoy romcoms that focus more on the female lead oppose to the male lead.

I enjoy the variety show setting a lot actually, but then again I have always enjoyed that setting in previous dramas that I have seen, so that doesn't surprise me. There isn't too many things that are outside the box when it comes to the characters, the over-the-top humor and all that that you often get in these romcoms. Sometimes that is grating, but I feel like it depends on the actors and both Go Kyung Pyo and Kang Han Na manage to make those more humorous, outlandish or sometimes quite childish scenes quite endearing, for the most part.

I will admit that I find the idea of the male lead that has sort of built up the image of a rich man, from a rich family while actually he is hiding the opposite from the world and that he just seems to be able to shut up and keep those lies going because he is too honest now quite funny and interesting as a premise. It kinda minds me of Chansung's character in What's Wrong with Secretary Kim and I loved that character in that drama.

[ziracona]

I love that phrasing how Julie has taken Sallie- A much older woman than her- under her wing. Kinda precious not gonna lie. Did they ever see much of Sally when she was the Nurse? Also what does Sally think of Julie? Also the moment in ur fic when Kate comforts Sally was very sweet, which makes me wonder do they have much of a relationship too? How was Sally's adjustment to the 21st century, especially in regards to her fear about her mental health? What was it you diagnosed Sally as?

Yeah haha that’s just how she is. Julie sees life more in power dynamics than tradition to age.

They saw her some. She was one that they tried to copy skills from. They never talked to her though. Sally likes Julie. Sally likes anyone who is nice to her, and she has no reason to dislike her. She thinks she’s odd, but she’s had a lot of odd friends by now. She likes to talk to Julie about realm stuff, because Julie won’t be uncomfortable, and sometimes can guess at killer things better than the survivors. Julie is also very feminine, if in a femme fatale way, and Sally is too, so they enjoy having someone to like, dress shop and go to a salon with.

Kate and Sally are definitely friends. She reads to Sally a lot, and takes her to do outdoorsy stuff, even horseback riding. Care of Sally initially fell to Kate amid the chaos, since everyone else was indisposed, almost dead, or with another priority. That never faded. And Sally thinks Kate is a very charming rural woman with great sense and a good voice. They have plenty of fun.

Sally adjusted pretty well. It in a way helped she was blind, because she never had a like ‘captain America times square’ moment to be forced to see. Things were more gradual, and introduced almost always in a very positive and friendly environment. There’s a lot like video games and cellphones and the internet that she finds very mind boggling and has some difficulty adapting to, but mostly she handles it very well. Having Benedict, from even longer ago, helps her a lot. I think she feels a lot less lost and alone when he asks her to help explain something she’s grasped quicker, as a 19teens woman, than him as an 1860s man.

Her fear about her mental health was strong for the first year, but eased after. She knows the people with legal custody (as gross as that is to say about a grown adult, it is sadly legally /still/ how this country treats the disabled) over her are trusted and going to keep her free, comfortable, cared for, and with them. So proof beats out worry eventually. She’s still anxious around strangers, about her seeming crazy, or out of time, or just being blind, but the others never make her go alone anywhere, so she’s usually protected by a mob of her people.

Diagnostically, I’m not sure there’s a clear cut answer. Hallucinations, paranoia, confusion, dissociative amnesia, etc, are all caused by essentially supernatural mind control and years and years of gaslighting and manipulation and being driven insane. She’s a psychotic, but more specific definitions, though might apply, I’m not sure what they’d be. There’s a lot she deals with, but some is from the Entity’s manipulations, some is the result of physical trauma, as some is the result of PTSD from the things she’s endured, both at it’s hands, and losing her kids. Diagnosis are really just the names for frequently occurring symptom clusters, because grouping makes them often easier to predict and treat. I’d just say in Sally’s case, I haven’t found one (or more) especially useful names for her symptom clusters.

[nerdyenby]

Yellow time :D I’m watching Gem

Aw the team skins are so precious

This team is everything, I don’t know Ant very well but I love Gem, Jimmy, and Shane and the vibes are already incredible

Who is slandering yellow???

Jim… what do you mean you don’t like sands….

“What’s our weakest game?” “None? Nothing” I love Shane

Gem’s silent awe at the fnaf skins 😂

Rocket Spleef

Either way Shane’s gonna cry, I guess

They’re getting so many kills lol

I feel like I haven’t heard people call Shane “Fire” in actual years, he’s just Shane or fbm in my mind

Gem is so right all the time

Grid Runners

Team games are simply the best

Their comms!!! /pos

Does Shane have a photographic memory??

UPPIES RAHHHHHHHH /pos

“Abysmal who?” Say it louder for the people in the back

Jimmy’s “OH!” Was so funny oh my gosh

Battle Box

That round against blue was so nice

Yeah their initial strat was the way to go

They killed it!!!

All top 15?!?? My streamers <33

Sands of Time

“Jimmy… daddy” and everyone losing their mind

Ant is clowning lol

Their comms are so good

There are so many mobs down Gem’s tunnel it’s absurd, was she not lighting up spawners?

Oh my gosh voices counting down are in my top ten sensory no nos

Ace Race

They’re so sweaty 😂

Omg spiderman

Gem first place!! I don’t care that it was early and only for a few seconds, it counts

Yo I haven’t seen anyone find that skip yet!!

2ND!!!!!

“Abysmal who? We’re cracked!!” Yeah you are!!!

Shane gonna need an intervention

Parkour Warrior

Ant being all “I guess I’ll stick around” 😂

Gem spotting the missing slab is so hermitcraft of her

“Live laugh love” “Live laugh love, gonna get it tattooed on me” “Yeah… if we win, bet?” “Bet” “No don’t- no I take it back!!” Them

I like that they all stayed in the call and it’s still absolutely silent

I was genuinely caught off guard when Gem meant it when she said “one more try”

“I would just give up, you know what I mean?” We all gotta hear it sometimes

Gem is not bad at parkour, who told her that?? She’s got solid game sense and control, it’s just not her forte and she beats herself up over it

“Guys, I’m pretty sure they were right on this one, that was pretty abysmal” nooooooo Jimmy ;-;

Hole in the Wall

Everyone losing their collective minds in hitw is my favorite MCC tradition, it’s been too long

“Jimmy and Shane, killing it, let’s go!!” “Chilling in a hot tub, five feet apart though” “Five feet apart, yep” “I hate you both” I love them

Two top ten!!!

Shane and Jimmy being the exact same person for three rounds straight

“Did we just become best friends?!” Jimmy /pos

Gem top ten!!!!!

Sky Battle

SHANE!!!!!

“You’re crazy, you’re crazy, I just threw up, you’re crazy” Jimmy #1 fbm stan real and true

Rip, good game and good vibes, solid team, got messed up by game order :/

Dodgebolt

We love some red support <333

The fnaf appreciation

Gem is an Aimsey believer, as she should!!

Everyone poking at how long this dodgebolt is but they all feel like this to me lol

Everything Antfrost does is to spite AntVenom, real and true

Trash talking Sapnap is always the move lmao

Not abysmal pogchamp

[darry-rules]

Night Shift

I work the night shift at a local mom-and-pop convenience store at the front of my neighborhood. We sell snacks, drinks, milk, bread, all the normal stuff that people need but aren’t willing to make a traditional run to the grocery store for. There was talk about adding a gas pump out front, but it hasn’t happened yet.

As a result, the night gets a bit slow at times. Of course, we got our usual druggie who strolls in to get his soda or to use the restroom, but sometimes I’ll sit at the counter for nearly an hour before someone strolls in.

It can get a bit boring at times, but I’ve always got a good book or a Youtube video to keep my mind occupied. I’m supposed to clean the store in the slow periods of my shift, and I do, but that never takes me long. Each night, usually around 1-2 am, I finish the chore list and find myself surfing the web or plopped down enjoying some novel.

The night of the encounter was like any other day. It had been slow. The store was quiet. No one had come in for an hour. I was re-reading my favorite Stephen King book, when I heard a thudding sound coming from the inventory room. I jumped at the noise. I know, not very manly of me, but I hadn’t expected it. Besides, I was at a pretty intense part of my book. I looked up at the digital clock sitting on the counter, it read 3:12 am. I didn’t really think anything of the noise. I just assumed it was something that fell off one of the shelves.

Even still, I felt a chill crawl its way down my spine. I remember glancing outside, and seeing a sea of thick fog blanketing the landscape. This wasn’t too uncommon. There was a lake across the street from the store, and occasionally fog would drift in. Still, I couldn’t recall a time when the fog was quite as thick as this.

I remember thinking that something could be standing out there watching me, and I wouldn’t even know. But it was more than that. At that moment, I knew there was something out there. It was instinctual, a primal sense developed over years. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and goose flesh began to break out all over my arms.

I was too frightened to get up from my spot at the cash register. I knew that I ought to investigate the sound in the back room, but I couldn’t get my body to respond. I sat there, unable to look away from the glass front door, trying desperately to peer through the thickening fog. I couldn’t see anything; but I was certain that if I turned away now, then the thing in the dark would rush forward.

The fear was multiplying, growing into a living creature trying to tear its way from my stomach. I felt cold sweat begin to pour from my brow, streaming into my open eyes and causing them to sting. I couldn’t blink. I was too worried about the consequences if I did, when I saw it.

Two pinpricks of light cut through the dense fog, temporarily blinding me. My panic rose to a crescendo, and my heart beat out of my chest. I half ducked behind the counter, when I saw the figure approaching the door. My hand slid across the underside of the counter to find the panic button that would alert the police, when the door swung wide.

A burly man in a green jacket and black pants came strolling in, an amused look on his face. He looked at me, raised an eyebrow and said, “Hey mister you ok? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

I sighed, and felt a physical weight lift off of me. I looked at him, and said, “Yeah sorry man. You just startled me, couldn’t see you approach the door until you opened it with all that fog out there.”

“Hey I hear you there. I could hardly see the road in front of me. Honestly, it’s a bit unnerving out there, it makes you think some strange thoughts,” said the man, looking a bit pensive.

“Right, I could’ve sworn that someone was out there. I mean I guess you were,” I said with a nervous laugh.

“Yeah, I was. It’s nights like this that makes one think,” said the man seriously.

I felt uncomfortable with his answer. He just remained there motionless, staring at the door to the back room. I still hadn’t investigated the noise in the back and the man’s blank look made me feel uneasy.

The silence in the room was beginning to weigh on me, and I couldn’t take one more moment of it.  I asked, “Think about what?”

The man smiled a toothy grin, and said, “Life, death, and all the moments in between.”

“I try not to think about the first two too often. After all, who can truly know?”

“Anyone can, if they are willing to pay the right price for it,” said the man, a hungry look gleaming in his eyes.

“You might be right. There is always a price to pay for knowledge. I mean I’m pretty sure Adam and Eve learned that lesson, and aren’t we still paying for it today.”

“True enough I suppose, but how is one supposed to live when one doesn’t know the reason for existence?” asked the man.

“I guess it is our duty to do the best with what we have in front of us.”

“And damn the truth huh?” replied the man.

“What truth? No one’s truth is true. Many claim to have the answers, but few have more than just hot breath.”

“Because many are liars, the truth doesn’t exist? That doesn’t seem to be an accurate conclusion either,” said the man.

“Does there have to be a singular truth? Why must it be universal? Can’t something be true to one and not true for the other?”

“I would say that truth by its essence must be true to all, or else it isn’t the truth. A truth true to you but not another is not the truth at all, it’s merely a solution. Are you content to live a life of solutions rather than one of true knowledge?” asked the man.

“The question is superfluous. Of course I’d rather live a life of universal knowledge, but who knows such truth?”

“And if I claimed to know the truth, what would you say to that?” questioned the man.

“I’d say you’re either insane or a liar.”

“Honest enough answer. But I am neither. I am something more. When one sees the truth they know it, so look and see for yourself,” said the man.

He took a couple steps forward, coming fully into the light, and I noticed his features for the first time. He had a severe look, a hawkish nose that looked as if it had been broken at least once. The landscape of his face was a jumble of cracks and wrinkles, dominated by a large scar that started right below his nose and continued through his lips stopping at his jawline.

It was the man’s eyes that made me feel the most uneasy. They were as black as tar, and they drilled into me. Making eye contact with the man was like looking directly into a black hole, they seemed to draw you deeper. There was a little light shining in the middle of the man’s pupil. I watched as it bounced and glowed, coming closer than drawing away. It was as if it was beckoning me to follow.

When I saw that gleam, I wanted nothing more than to follow it, and damn the consequences. There was a beauty to the way it pulsated that held me captivated. I looked and saw and knew that there were secrets to be found in those depths. I also knew that if I followed the light, there would be no coming back.

But I didn’t care.

I wanted to know. I wanted to see. The mysteries of the universe were held in that gyrating light bobbing in the abyss. I felt my soul beginning to be ripped from my body, torn from my essence and sent spiraling down that black tunnel towards that brilliant light.

It was that same crashing sound I had heard from the back room that broke the trance. I looked away from those eyes, and I came smashing back to reality. My mind was scrambled, and it took me a second to get back into a normal state.

The creature standing before me was just as confused as I was, clearly not used to its prey escaping it so easily. For a moment we looked at each other in utter shock. The man smiled at me showing ragged, pointed teeth. I looked away in disgust, trying to feel for the silent alarm button on the bottom of the counter. My hand brushed the button and I pressed it with all my strength.

The man remained standing there absolutely motionless. He could’ve been a statue for all I knew. He didn’t breathe nor did his heart beat. Those black eyes never blinked, and I didn’t dare make eye contact with him.

Finally, he looked down at his watch, and said, “The time is nearly here.”

With that the man turned and strolled directly out the door he had come. I watched him walk casually into the fog. I couldn’t see clearly, so I’m not entirely sure what I saw. But still, the figure almost seemed to melt as if it was evaporating into the mist.

One moment he was there, the next he wasn’t.

To this day, I still don’t know what I saw that night. I do know this, there are things that walk in the dark that man knows nothing about. It’s best to avoid certain watches of the night. I stay at home these days. I work in the safety of the daylight.

Once I tried to watch the security footage. All that can be seen is the front door opening and closing. Then about five minutes later it happens again. No man can be seen, but still something opened that door. You can see my lips moving as if I am talking, but there is no audio and the conversation can’t be heard.

And that’s the proof.

I tried to watch the back room footage. All that can be seen is a box of sodas busting as it falls from the top shelf. Then a few more minutes pass, and the whole metal rack holding the boxes of soda is knocked over.

I don’t know what saved my life. I do know this, I am still alive, and I intend on staying that way. I’d like to be able to explain to you what happened that night, but I am just as in the dark as you might be. Stories are supposed to wrap up nice and neat into a perfect little ribbon.

But when does life follow those rules?

We each live and die on this rock. We love, we hate, we fight, we make peace, and many of us don’t even know why we are here. I don’t claim to know the answers. All I know is this. I am still breathing, and some answers aren’t worth the price.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 22nd September

Sometimes listening to the charts like this throws you up a forgotten treasure. Sometimes it's aggressively awful. Sometimes its in the middle and easily forgettable. But once in a while you get something else, something you can't quite categorise so easily. This, I would posit, is one of those songs. It breaks the great-to-terrible spectrum entirely, by dint of just being bizarre.

Close the Door - The Stargazers (peaked at Number 6)

There is nothing this song reminds me more of than a bad acid trip. If you told me that this was a lesser known early Pink Floyd oddity, I would not in any way doubt you. This is music they could play to drive you actually, medically insane.

We start with a high-pitched child's voice going "bah-dah-bah-dah-bah-dah" in a sing-song playground way, except something's been done to it, or it's been recorded such that it sounds uncannily like Crazy Frog's 1950s ancestor. It's a modern enough vibe that I actually stopped straight away and checked I'd got the right song, that's how weirdly 2000s it sounds.

Cutting straight across this, if you can imagine, is a chorus of what sound like grown men shouting Look out! which is all the intro you get before the Stargazers proper launch into the song, imploring you to Close the door, they're comin' through the window / Close the door, they're runnin' up the stairs / Close the door, They're hangin' off the ceiling / Those - bah-dah-bah-dah-bah-dah - are everywhere!

I think the most nightmarish thing here is that it's never specified what "they" are. They're clearly appearing in some number, and obviously unwanted by our main character, who is introduced gardening, before he them coming, warning everybody around him to get into the house, before attempting to hit them with a cricket bat - strong post-apocalyptic fantasy vibes. I'm imagining a world ravaged by attacks by small, malevolent, fanged goblins or pixies, or something of that ilk (Nac Mag Feegle?)

At the end of every verse, our main character gets a couple of lines, and he sings like a drunk pirate with a head cold gargling nails. Once you've got past this, you can hear about how They got into the kitchen, they got into the sink / They went into the cellar and poured themselves a drink / They got on the piano, ran up and down the keys / And soon I was a-standin' in 'em right up to me knees. I think this is meant to give a sense of lovable mischief-makers, except it all just sounds terrifying.

And then they're gone, and we get a comical, slowed-down verse about how Now that all the fuss is over, I sink into my chair / This house is all a shambles, but really I don't care. And... fair enough? You've had an ordeal, you've earned it. Except our main character can't catch a break, because as soon as he announces that I'm going to take it easy, try not to think of them ... You guessed it! Bah-dah-bah-dah-bah-dah-bah-dah - here they come again!

I'll not beat around the bush. This is a fever dream. I don't like it, but I do kind of respect its commitment to weirdness. It's working in a long-established tradition of children's novelty songs, it's got strong Alice in Wonderland vibes (and the Disney film did only come out four years previously) and it's also reminiscent of some of the worst 1990s and 2000s cheaply-produced novelty tracks. You could have easily sold a re-vamped version of this to me as a kid without even adding very many changes.

In some ways, this is a song that could have been a hit at almost any point, just by sheer weirdness. It doesn't make it good, but I like how strongly it commits to the bit. I also enjoyed the shock value of the Crazy Frog-alike at the start - you can absolutely imagine it cutting through the radio fuzz and hooking kids nationwide with its pure silliness and wanton chaos.

Favourite song of the completely-bizarre bunch: Close the Door

[scorpius-major]

#class is now in session!

Ft: Hu Tao, Barbara, Zhongli, Childe, and Gn! Reader

College au!

in which each character gets their own major and school headcannons

𝙃𝙪 𝙏𝙖𝙤

Mortuary science major without a doubt

Gives off chaotic theater kid vibes as well

Has definitely brought an Ouija board to multiple different sleepovers on multiple different occasions

She’s that one friend that gives you oddly frightening fun facts. Facts that make you go “why does she know that?”

“Did you know that if you eat around 10 crushed black cherry pits there’s enough cyanide to kill you?”

Just leaves you sitting there like ma’am how do you know that?

Hu Tao would peer pressure you into joining theater with her

If you have stage fright she’d find a way to expel it from you

In class she can be very committed to work

If you sit next to her however, that’s a different story

has surprisingly good grades ngl

you sometimes wonder how she keeps up with the work while simultaneously goofing off in class

it frightens you sometimes

like she was dead asleep in class one time and nothing would wake her up

until the professor asked her a question

She sat up really quickly and answered it correctly

you just stared at her like🤨

needless to say you quickly stopped questioning her abilities as a student after that

Barbara

choir kid without a doubt

like no explanation needed

no fr barbs literally has the most angelic voice you’ve ever heard

you probably met in a music theory class

let me just tell you this lady is the most respectful roommate EVER

omg her room is always so clean and tidy it’s just like

miss please teach me your ways I beg🧎🏾‍♀️

stright A student without a doubt

her classes are probably all honors too

with the occasional AP

Not exactly a “teacher’s pet” but like is always willing to help them out

She probably becomes a teacher’s aid at one point

please let her tutor you, she loves it

Ayaka

Dancing major without a doubt

she’s taking a business class too

and also studies traditional Japanese calligraphy

listen I didn’t wanna be the one to say it but

she was the kid who reminded to teacher they had homework in middle school

IT JUST MAKES SENSE💀

if you’re a dance major too, she will always partner with you

another respectful af roommate

she cooks too

and it’s absolutely delicious

like she will cancel any takeout you order and will cook herself

another star student

it always surprises you how she can keep up her grades with her 17 different extracurricular activities

Zhongli

let’s be honest he probably is the professor💀

he’d teach world history without a doubt

that or AP English

i can’t see him as a math teacher

most def the teacher that everybody loves

he’s well aware too

i like to think he takes a little pride in being “the coolest teacher”

yeah let’s be honest he probably subtly humble brags ab it in the teachers lounge😭

he’s also the teacher that everybody trys to guess his age and terribly fails at it lmao

Struggles a LOT with technology

when he first tried to use a smart board he got so frustrated he never used it again

probably the only teacher who still uses textbooks and whiteboards

back in his college days I can kinda see him being a philosophy major

but he changed career choices and became a professor instead

Childe

STILL hasn’t figured out his major lmao💀

he fr changes it like every 3-5 business days

without a doubt he got in on a sports scholarship

med avg grades

i can see him struggling in math idk he just seems like the type of guy I can’t explain it

another one who is a really awesome cook

hes probably involved in a frat house ngl

if you’re roommates expect little to no sleep

heavy college fuckboy vibes

but in an endearing way

idk this is really random but in grade school he was the kid at the water fountain who would say “one, two, three, that’s enough for me” whenever someone was more than three seconds

He also would pick a fight with the 8th graders when he was in like 3rd and after he lost he’d tell his friends that he beat up an 8th grader

def a partier

he’d drag you out to parties late at night

but he always makes sure your comfortable and safe at them

love a respectful man fr

please help him in math he’s begging

[reidsnose]

hair tie

overview: spencer and the reader start carpooling to work together

genre: fluff!!

a/n: i really dont know if this one is any good i just thought the idea was cute but let me know what yall think :)

masterlist

-

-

spencer was startled by the sudden knock, guests were rare in his little apartment, let alone this early in the morning. a bit paranoid he put his hand over the gun attached to his hip, just in case.

what surprised him even more than the unexpected knock was seeing you through the peep hole when he got to the door.

"y/n? are you ok?" he worried, scanning you up and down quickly to make sure you weren't hurt.

"no um i'm ok," you nervously chewed on your lip, "i was going to call you but i don't have your cell yet. oh my gosh this is going to sound so weird."

you were relatively new to the BAU and they were all very welcoming. the only person who seemed a little bit more closed off was Spencer.

it was true, he was avoiding you a little bit, but only because you were the most beautiful human being he had ever seen; which only made you that much more intimidating. he was afraid. what if he said something stupid? what if the second he opened his mouth you started thinking he was just his IQ. but you were fully a part of the team now. he would have to at least be aquatinted with you.

"its ok, you can say it." he encouraged kindly, causing you to visibly relax.

"ok. oh before i ask i want to preface this by saying you could totally say no i completely understand its a super weird thing especially because we barely know each other." you took a breath as he nodded, a slightly amused smile toyed with his lips.

"i understand the implications. proceed." he mentally slapped himself for wording his thoughts like that.

"do you maybe.. wanna drive to work together? i heard you talking about how you take the train and i also heard that you have an aversion to germs and i drive by your apartment to get to work anyway so i-" you cut yourself off, looking up and seeing him staring at you wide eyed. "i'm sorry this is too weird i over stepped my boundaries and now you dislike me even more. i'm sorry for interrupting your morning. um, you're going to be late for work if i don't leave you alone so ill just- sorry. i'm sorry."

truthfully, this was one of the kindest things anyone has ever offered to do for him. and you offered it with genuine kindness, no ulterior motives to try and get something from him. he stood stunned. how were you so beautiful AND kind. and still somehow a little intimidating.

"we're gonna be late" he called out.

"what?" you turned, having already walked a couple steps from his apartment, your heart beating a bit faster at the sound of his voice.

"you said i'm going to be late. but were carpooling. so we'll both be late," he said matter-a-factly, grabbing his coat and satchel.

"YES!" you laughed, a cracking a wide smile and punching the air triumphantly.

you leaned against the railing of the stairs as you watched him lock up. he was tall and slender and very handsome. so handsome. not handsome like morgan, handsome in a way you were sure you'd never seen before. an incredibly unique and scarce handsomeness that only Spencer Reid had. you tried to forget those thoughts as he began walking towards you.

"i don't dislike you, by the way." he blurted as the two of you walked down the stairs. he felt bad that he made you think he isn't fond of you; the problem was he was too fond of you.

"oh! thats good i've been trying to think of every interaction we've ever had because i was afraid i might have said or done something."

"truth be told," he huffed out a breath, "i was kind of intimidated by you."

you laughed a real, genuine laugh from deep in your belly as you reached your car. the sheer coincidence of the situation as well as your entirely non intimidating nature was seriously laughable.

"you cant be serious! did Garcia tell you?" you asked, completely dumbfounded.

"tell me what?" he asked back, confusion lacing his voice.

"that i was intimidated by you!" you confessed.

"what? this guy in Texas called me a pipe cleaner with eyes! how could i have possibly intimidated you?"

he looked around your car trying to subtly profile you. thats when he noticed you had put hand sanitizer in the passenger side door. and you had pushed the seat back to accommodate for his long legs. it was just two little things, two ways you put a little extra effort in to make him feel welcome, but he was 100% positive if he thought about it too much he would cry. he felt the need to do something like this for you. not to get even or anything, but simply because he wanted to make you feel the way he felt right now.

"i don't know! you're so tall and smart and you seemed quiet but i guess thats only because you were avoiding me. are you sure garcia didnt tell you?" you laughed, watching the road.

now it was his turn to laugh, "no i swear, Garcia didn't say anything about that to me!"

The two of you continued driving, either talking or sitting in a comfortable silence. and this little carpool became a tradition. the two of you arriving and leaving work together every single day, causing the two of you to become closer.

you had to admit, every morning and evening you spent with Spencer made him just seem more and more perfect. unbeknownst to you, the exact same thing was happening with him.

he noticed, one day, as you were pulling your hair up to tie in a ponytail, your hands alternated searching your wrists for a hair tie but there wasn't one there. once he noticed it once, he started noticing it constantly. on a case, in the office, in the car, at a bar. you always seemed to forget your hair ties.

so he went to the store after you drive him home one day, and got a few packs of hair ties. after paying for them, he put one on each wrist and the rest in his satchel, so next time, when you needed one, he'd have it.

he felt like such a creep, constantly watching you to see when you would try to put your hair up. of course the rest of the team took notice, though they had noticed your obvious incline towards each other, Spencer was clearly acting a little weird.

and then it happened.

the two of you were partnered to go to the crime scene on a case, and you went to tie up your hair before you entered the scene. he could hardly contain his excitement, his mind moving a mile a minute trying to decide how he wanted to give you the hair tie. he watched one of your hands search your wrist, but this time it pulled off a little black band and started looping it around your hair.

he couldn't believe it. he finally had a chance to make you feel a portion of the way he felt when he saw your effort in making his car Spencer-friendly, and new he had to think of a new way to do it.

snap.

he looked over and saw you holding what used to be your hair tie, now no longer a band, but a completely useless elastic line.

"you've gotta be-" you muttered to yourself, but your sentence was interrupted as Spencer nonchalantly jutted his wrist towards you. "what are you doing?"

"take my hair tie." he stated simply, trying so hard not to blush. this became even harder as your fingers graced the skin of his wrist while you pulled the hair tie off.

"oh! thank you! you're a life saver!" you breathed, cracking a wide smile as you used it to tie your hair up.

you couldn't help the butterflies going absolutely insane in your stomach. why did he have a hair tie? does he tie his hair up sometimes? why have you never seen it up? you tried to suppress a smile, that would be completely inappropriate for a crime scene.

but you couldn't suppress the warm feeling in your chest. because that was always there when Spencer was around.

-

ultra mega super cool taglist:

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife

[faetxlity]

A Bit of Peace

Lambert/Eskel (2758 Words) Rated: E - Ao3 Link

Based off of THIS post by @whataboutthefish

Summary: Eskel wants a bit of peace around the keep but the hot headed trainee won’t let him have it.

      Eighteen, angry, and more pent up than a chort in season; that was how they described Lambert. The young soon-to-be-Witcher snapped and snarled at everyone older than him -and even a few younger trainees who had more pride than sense- no matter how many beatings he was put through for it. He cursed, he destroyed, and he spit in the face of every tradition and code Kaer Morhen held dear.

 “He needs a good fuck to set him right.” More than one Witcher muttered late around the fires. Eskel was inclined to agree. Sometimes.

 He himself was just old enough to demand respect from both elders and younger adepts, established in his own right as a damn good Witcher. It was this little fact that kept half the Keep from dragging Lambert into a storage room and wiping that permanent scowl from his pouting lips and giving him something to be bowlegged about. Because if anyone was going to put the pup in his place it was Eskel. Unfortunately, honor had stayed his hand each time there was an opportunity to do so. That same honor did not stop him from following the little Wolf into the baths late one autumn evening after listening to him curse Vesemir from one side of the mountain to the other and back. Whatever he'd done had earned him a lashing that he was clearly hoping to soak the sting out of.

 It certainly didn’t stop him from sinking into the water across from him with a sigh and muted “You can’t keep letting your anger control you. You need a damn outlet.” He almost added ‘pup’ to the comment but refrained. Barely.

 “What do you recommend, oh wait let me guess- you want me to suck your cock? Very original.” The sneer that twisted his face was unattractive. He was so expressive that his face already sported deep lines around his eyes and forehead, like a map of emotion. If he ever smiled it would be cute.

 “If you think it would help I wouldn’t say no.” Eskel stretched his arms wide on the edge of the pool and closed his eyes as he continued “Or in the reverse.”

 That stopped the young pup in his tracks, whatever spite was on his tongue halted and reformed.

 “Why in the thrice damned hell would you want to do that?”

 “Because I enjoy it.” Not necessarily the act itself but the effect it had on a partner was exquisite. He could go on his knees for hours just to feel that rush as someone lost control because of him, a hand in his hair and trembling thighs around his ears. That was damn close to bliss.

 They were joined by other Witchers then, technically Lambert wasn’t allowed in the springs at that time of day but he was the one survivor of his year and just a few months from his medallion - if Barmin and the others decided he was worth one after all the trouble he’d caused. No one was going to run him off when Eskel seemed to have given him permission.

 Eskel stayed in the water until he was lightheaded with the heat and then, only as he passed Lambert to be on his way, did he speak again.

 “Feel free to come to my room if you want to take me up on that offer.”

 He never really expected the mild effort to bear fruit. It took all of two days for Eskel to open the door to his room find Lambert sitting on his bed, seemingly come through the window if the snowprint on the sill was any indication. He’d heard the whispers that Rennes was pissed, spitting mad over an insult thrown out at lunch from their resident foul mouthed pup but he’d not expected to wind up in the middle of it.

 The door was heavy when it fell closed, a sort of finality in the sound of it. Lambert wasted no time in pushing forward and into Eskel’s chest with the demand to “strip”.  One might have thought he knew what he was doing.

 Vicious, wild, needy - there were many ways to describe the way Lambert kissed and the less generous of men would simply leave it at fumbling and unskilled. His lips were chapped, hands fisted hard in Eskel’s undershirt, and it was Eskel’s grace that saved them both the pain of a chipped tooth. But for all of that the pup was desperate, unwilling or unable to pull away to help Eskel in the simple task of undoing his own laces. He kissed with a desperation found in the adrenaline after a fight, the reunion of lovers, and the fervor of a dream.  

 Eskel tended to be slow to arousal, no longer twenty and better pleased by the slow spread of warmth in his belly than an inferno and fumble behind a barn but the simple fact that he was wanted with such desperation went far to getting him hard and willing.

Lambert broke free of their kiss with a gasp.

 “Wanna suck your cock.”

 And that was how Lambert ended up on his knees between Eskel’s thighs while the older Witcher sat on his bed wondering when exactly he had lost control of the situation. Lambert was no more skilled there than he was in kissing- no one to practice with. Eskel realized. He’d known that Lambert was the last of his group, the one of thirteen to make it to the end, but it was the first time he really thought about it. What being the only one meant.

 For him it meant that Lambert wasn’t careful, he scraped teeth along sensitive flesh while trying to find the right angle and his shoulders were set with years of tension that did nothing to ease the bob of his head. Lithe hands alternated between holding and stroking the length that he couldn’t fit into his pretty mouth and Eskel was almost too aware of the sounds and saliva dripping from an occupied mouth. It wasn’t good, not really. It was hot and wet but those were the only saving factors.

 “Slow down.” He urged, hoping that the young man’s known hatred of all things authoritative didn’t extend to this. He had potential to make it good, he just needed to listen. Lambert surged forward, seemingly intent on choking himself. “Lam-“ The pup had a Witcher’s strength when he knocked Eskel’s hand aside. For just a moment he had been able to touch the soft fluff of his hair. “Shit- you need to-“

 He needed to stop before he hurt himself but he wouldn’t listen. It took just seconds more for him to push too far too fast and he retched, body convulsing as he fell backwards onto the floor. All before Eskel could even get his hands on him.

 Too his credit, Lambert didn’t lose his stomach. He twisted and coughed, gagged and shuddered, but he kept his stomach. Before Eskel could assure him that it was alright he lunged for the door.

 Shaking hands fumbled the lock and he cursed violently, voice wrecked.

 “Pup.” Eskel stood to follow, wrapped one arm around Lambert’s thin waist and dragged him back against his chest; kicking and writhing all the while even with his feet in the air.

 “Fuck you! Let me go you fucking whoreson!” He spit while landing a hard kick to Eskel’s shin. If Eskel hadn't been going soft before he was after that. The tirade continued for a minute - everything from calling him a cruel bastard to damn pervert until Lambert seemed to realize Eskel wasn’t doing more than holding him. He wasn’t even really trying to stop Lambert from hitting him. He just wanted Lambert to be still, just for a moment. That was all he’s ever wanted out of this stupid endeavor. A moment of peace.

 “What is this?” He rumbled. “What’s under your skin?”

 “I just want-“ Lambert bit his tongue so hard that blood blossomed in the air. Eskel waited, blood rushing in his ears as he fought down the urge to bite at the column of Lambert’s neck. “I need- shit- I’m lonely and no one here is fucking- I can’t do it. Nothing is right.”

 He doesn’t shush him, it feels wrong when the pup is trying so hard to explain himself but he did press a kiss to the tendon in his neck. It was as much for his own benefit as for Lambert's.

 “I understand.” He somewhat lied as he pet over the shaking boy’s ribs and let him stand on his own two feet, providing support as needed. “Now tell me, do you want to continue? Let me show you how to do it right?”

 It was instinct to nuzzle forward against the curl of hair beneath Lambert’s ear. To give in to the desire to kiss the salt from his skin and breathe him in. Just as it was instinct for Lambert to tilt his head and give Eskel more access. Gently he sucked a mark, the first of many.

 “Yes. Yes, I want it.”

 “Good boy.” He was not proud of how he tore Lambert’s shirt off of him but he was delighted by the gasp it drew from the pup. With purpose worked his way down the pup’s throat as his hands wandered over his chest to find wonderfully sensitive nipples. He hadn’t been allowed to play earlier and he intended to take his time then.

 Pulling his lips away from Lambert’s skin was difficult but worth it. So very worth it to be able to gaze at Lambert face when it was open and honest. For the first time in memory there was not a trace of anger in him and it was beautiful. Damn near pretty really.

 He's got dark lashes that rest above sharp cheekbones flushed with pleasure, long enough to give a working girl jealous pause. His lips, full and bruised but soft, are parted around whimpery little noises no one else on the continent had the pleasure of hearing. His nose was already crooked from too many breaks but it doesn’t detract from his beauty. It's a warrior's imperfection for Lambert was a fighter and for the moment he’s Eskel’s. His efforts in getting Lambert off had gone far in renewing his own interest in the proceedings. Lambert arched into a twist of his nipple and Eskel’s cock slid along between his cheeks.

 “Pretty thing.”  The front of Lambert’s trousers were dark with precum and he had half a mind to see if the boy could cum from just this. But he wasn’t cruel. He slid one big paw into Lambert’s braies and stroked the backs of his fingers over the length of him. It took no more than that for Lambert to gasp and cry out, falling fully into Eskel’s chest as he makes a mess of himself.

 Eskel used his teeth to tug at his earlobe and whispered.

 “Ok little wolf, let’s start that again."

 He stripped Lambert down where they stood and then helped him to lay on his back, head nestled in the pillows. Eskel had more than the average Witcher, preferring to sleep half sitting even at home. It made a perfect spot for displaying a pretty, desperate pup. “There’s not a Witcher in this keep who won’t know what I’ve done with you.” He growled, pressing Lambert's knees wider. The boy was already half hard again.

 “Does that get you going? Everyone knowing that you’re a dirty old- ah!” Eskel dipped down to take the pup’s cock into his mouth, laving his tongue over the silky flesh and cleaning him of his own cum. Lambert squirmed, oversensitive and unsure whether he should press into Eskel’s mouth or get away. It was cute.

 The hardened flesh jumped with he sealed his mouth over the head and sank down on it; usually he would tease some and see what noises he could coax from that once-abused throat but not that night, not with the trust laid at his feet. This was a demonstration and a promise all in one and he would do his task well.

 “Eskel!” Lambert gripped his hair on the right side of too hard and tugged. “Fuck- I can’t!” He sucked hard in response, his tongue dipping into Lambert’s slit before pulling off.

 He felt almost cruel when he turned his head and bit a mark into the pup’s thigh. At least, he would have if Lambert’s cock didn’t spurt cum as he shuddered through a second orgasm in near as many minutes. Eskel shuffled back, smoothed his palms down the inside of Lambert’s thighs and cupping his calves, not digging in but holding him steady.  His chest was heaving like a racehorse and Eskel decided swiftly that a break was in order. He slid his hands up the length of Lambert’s body, mostly unscarred, until he himself was prone above the young man. Flipping them so that Lambert laid half atop his chest was laughably easy.

 “You haven’t-“ Lambert squirmed, pressing his thigh firmly against Eskel’s cock. It took all his control to keep his hips still.

 “There’s time, let me hold you for now. Enjoy the afterglow.”

 The others wouldn’t believe him if he said Lambert was a cuddler, capable of tucking his face against another’s neck and being soft and pliant. That he was sweet and needy underneath the curses and hatred. Eskel wanted to show them all how they’d been wrong; he never wanted to Lambert from his sight.

 The kiss he bestowed on Lambert’s pouting lips was lazy, an open press of mouths and sharing of breath. His tongue swiped over and then behind the pup’s teeth, exploring the taste of him and then allowing him to clumsily do the same. Lambert took too long poking around the busted tooth where his lip didn’t close right and he turned his head away.

 “S’not polite to linger on things like that.”

 They kissed again and again until Lambert pushed himself up and said,

 “I’d like to try again.”

 They rearrange so that Eskel is propped against the pillows and Lambert is laid between his thighs, arms wrapped around a folded fur for his own comfort.

 Never let it me said that the boy couldn’t learn.

 He started slow, licking around the base and working up to the head of Eskel’s weeping cock.

 “That’s it.” He praised. “Keep going.” Lambert took him shallowly into his mouth, one hand sliding up to work what he couldn’t fit. It was slow but good and rather than watch Eskel tipped his head against the wall and slipped fingers into the boy’s hair. Lambert stiffened but once satisfied he was doing no more than petting he relaxed back into his task.

 There was no rush to finish, just varying pressure and heat as Lambert learned what made the Witcher moan and shift his hips, what made his toes curl into the blankets. Whenever Lambert's jaw tired he switched to laving the shaft with his tongue before taking him deep as he dared once more. Eskel's orgasm nearly caught him unaware and rather than give warning he used his grip in Lambert’s too-soft hair to drag him up for a kiss, finishing on both their stomachs. Laying his claim.

 “That was good.” He rumbled, kissing Lambert’s jaw. “Perfect.”

 The squirming began again and Eskel reluctantly released his hold. “Use my shirt.” If Lambert was going to clean up at least Eskel could stake one last claim on him. Lambert wiped his stomach almost aggressively and turned to drag his clothing on jerkily with jelly-like limbs. The effect was clumsy and Eskel frowned.

 “Hey, hey pup look at me.” Lambert froze but didn’t turn. “Lambert, come back here.” It was the wrong thing to say as the young man started toward the door. Annoyance crept in and he sighed.

 “Lambert, I want you to stay. It’s warm and I’ll bring up breakfast in the morning. Ain't no need to leave after you're done, not here at least.”

 He’d never know if it was his plea, the food, or the promise of warmth that lured Lambert back into his bed but one of them worked.

 They slept back to front, Lambert safely tucked in Eskel’s arms and Eskel with his nose buried in the curl of hair at the back of Lambert’s neck.

 Eighteen, exhausted, and desperate for a bit of kindness, Lambert slept and Eskel got his peace.

[clouds-rambles]

hey hey! could you possibly do just some random headcanons for klee , qiqi , and diona with the reader as a older sister/brother? if so then thanks!

omg yes of course. Klee banner rerun when so I can complete the family?

Pairings; (Platonic, Separate) Klee, Qiqi, and Diona x reader

Warning(s); cute sibling shit be warned, alcohol mention on diona’s

Keep reading under the cut!

Klee

Being an elder sibling to Klee definitely is a task to behold, especially since your mother isn’t here and your sister had been joint entrusted to you and the knights of Favonius

The best way for the knights to describe you is a ‘pain in the ass’ at least severity and a ‘instigator of chaos’ at worse. How are you supposed to say no to your cute baby sister?

Whenever Klee is in confinement you’ll always find a way to sneak in with a few snacks and some toys. The two of you can sit in that room for hours playing with the model horses

Sometimes when Klee is upset she’ll do practically anything to find you, which isn’t limited to breaking out of the knights headquarters and roaming town just to latch onto you

You’ll pick her up without much word and ask her questions as you go about your chores for the day

While both you and Klee had been granted visions you can’t help but pale in comparison to your younger siblings antics. The only way of showing yourself these days is wrapping Klee’s bombs in the power of your vision so they don’t hurt anyone

On days you’re tasked with looking after Klee you’ll often find yourselves somewhere deep in Mondstat causing general trouble for camps of hilichurls and the odd ruin guard

Full of childish wonder Klee loves to run headfirst into fights often with no regard of either of your lives.

In all fairness she’s a kid and you really don’t want to ruin her childish wonder with harsh reality's of death and major injury

About once a week Klee will ask you to make an extra meal for a picnic and the two of your make a trip to the camp at the foot of Dragonspine peak

Klee loves dropping in on the alchemist as much as she loves dropping in on you. And you’re pretty sure you see Albedo’s eyes light up when he sees Klee

Klee loves trying to help you cook, like most kids do, you’ll get her to wear her cute lil apron and you’ll give her something messy to do with her hands. 

She’ll ask to help when you’re making bread so, unless the bread is a gift to someone, you’ll give her enough dough to make a roll and after its baked she’ll happily eat the roll for lunch. Jean tells you that she’ll come into her office telling her all about how Klee had made the bread

You swear you can feel your heart skip a beat. How is your baby sister allowed to be so adorable?

Qiqi

While you truly weren’t the one who found Qiqi, it was Baizhu who came into the pharmacy one day with a small child in his arms

After much quizzing along the lines of ‘Did you just kidnap a child!?’ ‘Put that child back where it came from, or so help me’ Baizhu just explains how he found Qiqi. A zombie!? That’s possible!?

Being a ever present figure in Qiqi’s life she doesn’t ever forget you, you love to see her little eyes widen in delight when she sees you 

You’re always more than happy to accompany her on her trips to find herbs, it’s almost scary how Qiqi seems to know the location of every Liyue native plant and ore. 

Sometimes the two of you will sit on the roof of Bubu Pharmacy and watch the finches fly about 

Sometimes you’ll find Qiqi getting upset about how she can’t reach or do something that she had given orders to herself to do. So, if you can pick her up and let her get the item, or if you both can’t get it you’ll say the command words “I love you most” which make her previous orders nul and void

Qiqi tries her best to remember as many thing about you as she can, she truly loves you and often thanks the archons for giving her such a great sibling

When Qiqi introduces you as her sibling it makes your heart weep. You love that kid so much that seeing her call you anything close to family can, and has, made you cry

Although Qiqi does technically live with Baizhu she often spends most nights with you, opting to the nice bed you have set up for her and an hour or so of fairy tales to tell her

If you wake up after Qiqi in the mornings you’ll often find her snuggled between your arms, while she may dislike the heat greatly Qiqi cannot help but feel protected when she sleeps in your arms

Sometimes you’ll also join Qiqi while she’s exercising around Liyue Harbour. You can’t help but feel like a proud mama whenever you see her going about her daily chores and activities

Diona

Not long after Diona left for Mondstat you had decided to follow. While your father may have been distraught at your sisters departure he is in fact a grown man, and you refuse to leave your little sister alone, no matter how safe the streets of Mondstat are

You’re careful to not drink around your sister, you know how she feels towards your dad, and in all honesty you feel much of the same. But about once a week you like to meet up with friends and share a pint, or three. Diona often mentions it back handily the next day but she’s cute so she gets away with it

No matter how much Diona hates her job as a bartender you can’t argue with the fact that she makes the best mixes no matter how hard she tries not to, seeing her fume to you after another concoction of hers turned into a success is so funny to you

In all fairness your sister is very much independent, so much so it makes you wonder if you should have stayed with your dad. But on Diona’s days off she loves to walk about town with you perched on your shoulders as you go about the daily chores

As much as Diona refuses to see your father you often write him letters to see how he’s doing. While being an alcoholic was what drove you apart, you’re still concerned about his health. The last thing you want is the death of your father on your hands so close to the death of your mother

Diona doesn’t remember your mother much, but she can guess much. Driving your father to alcoholism upon her death must have meant she was a pillar for the family. The face you pull at the mention of your mother means she must have been a great one. Diona has never asked how she passed, she doesn’t think you or your father have the heart to tell her

While the two of you have moved out of Springvale indefinitely the weekly practice of hunting for the weeks meat is a tradition by no means dropped. The thrill of the hunt is exhilarating to the both of you and defiantly puts both your feline genes to the test

Sometimes if Diona has a particularly bad nightmare she’ll wake you up, no matter the time of the night, just so she can sit with you and get her mind of the nightmare. And when your sister falls asleep in your arms? Well you’ve got to put her back to bed. What a cutie

[fruitcoops]

Hi, Eve

Rose here from yesterday, thank you very much for the Birthday message, I wasn't expecting you to read it let alone reply but I was looking for Coops kids Birthday fluff specifically. It doesn't matter if you don't have time however as I don't want to be a bother.

Hello Rose, and happy (belated) 20th birthday! Sorry for the wait--I really wanted to get this one right to celebrate such an important number. I hope your day was absolutely fantastic! SW credit goes to @lumosinlove, but Stella is an OC

Combined with asks for Sirius lightly making fun of Remus' accent and Remus yelling at a game show (@nazar4114)

“Medusa!” Stella shouted with all the force in her thirteen-year-old lungs. Remus leaned forward on the couch. “Medusa!”

The front door opened with a creak. “I’m h—”

“Yes!” they cheered in unison as Nicole answered correctly. Remus turned and gave Stella a double high-five, feeling his heart squeeze at the vivid joy on her round face. “Good guess.”

“I knew she was gonna get it,” Stella said with a pump of her fist as she turned back to the show and folded her legs underneath her.

“Gonna,” a familiar deep voice mimicked from the doorway. Paper bags rustled before footsteps stopped behind the couch; Remus tilted his chin up without sparing a glance, and Sirius pressed a laugh-laced kiss to his cheek before dropping one on Stella’s head as well. “You sound too much like your dad.”

“Love you, too,” Remus said wryly.

“I’ll take ‘Myths and Moths’ for 400, please.” Nicole’s voice snapped his attention back to the screen, and Stella narrowed her eyes.

“Daily Double!” the automated voice announced. Stella gasped; Remus bit his lower lip. “This mythical shield was wielded by Athena, and is sometimes said to be made of goat skin.”

“Aegis,” Stella whispered, then raised her voice. “It’s the Aegis, Nicole. You know this.”

“We know you do,” Remus said, scooting forward. “You just guessed whose head is on it.”

Nicole’s buzzer went off with two seconds to spare. “What is the Aegis?”

“Hell yeah!” Stella whooped.

Remus turned to her and raised his eyebrows. “Excuse you.”

“Sorry.”

“Are you two going to do this the whole afternoon?” Sirius asked from the kitchen, obviously amused. “We might need to get the neighbors some noise-cancelling headphones.”

Stella blew a dark lock of hair out of her eyes as she flopped her head back. “It’s almost final Jeopardy, papa. We have, like, ten minutes.”

Sirius blinked at her, then shook his head. “I swear you two share genes.”

“Ope, you caught me,” Remus said over the noise of the commercial break. “When I was 20 and had literally never left Wisconsin, I went and had a secret kid in Maine who looks terribly like you just so that someone would watch Jeopardy reruns with me thirteen years later. Oops.”

“It’s the truth,” Stella said with great gravity. “I remember.”

“Mon dieu,” Sirius muttered, though he couldn’t keep a smile down. He had never been able to hide around Stella, not once in the three years since they had adopted her. It was one of the things Remus loved most about him. “By the way, nobody under the age of fourteen is allowed in the kitchen for the next…hour. Ish.”

Stella squirmed around until she could rest her arms on the back of the couch. “What if I get thirsty?”

“I’m sure you can invoke birthday privileges and ask your dad to get something for you.”

“Birthday privileges?” Remus scoffed. “Nobody in this house has a birthday today. Yours was last month, and mine’s in March.”

“It’s my birthday,” Stella said.

“What? No, it’s not.”

“Yeah-huh.”

“Your birthday is in June.”

“It’s today.”

“Or maybe July?”

“It’s today, in December, when there’s snow,” she insisted, throwing herself back against the pillows. “Come on, dad, that’s not funny anymore.”

Remus raised his eyebrows. “Is somebody too old to find their poor old dad amusing now? Can you go back to being twelve so somebody will laugh at my jokes again? I know, I know, we're super lame compared to all your friends’ parents—”

“So lame,” Sirius agreed from the kitchen.

“—but I like to think we get one more year of pre-teen cuteness before the teen angst takes over.”

Stella sat up again with a groan. Looking at her, Remus saw a mix of himself and Sirius that had always baffled him, considering they had adopted her comparatively late in her life; beneath it was something uniquely Stella. Maybe it was her double-jointed elbows, or the board-straightness of her hair next to their curls, but there was no mistaking that she was her own person through and through. He loved that about her. “I’m not going to be a terrible teenager.”

Sirius poked his head around the edge of the kitchen—his nose was adorned with a smudge of flour. “Can I record that for future use?”

“Non.”

“Ooo, using the French,” Remus hissed. “That transformation is already beginning.”

“It’s not like you were bad teenagers, right?” She settled upside-down on the couch with her flamingo-patterned socks high in the air.

“I almost convinced Grandma to let me dye my hair blue, but otherwise I was pretty good.”

“I was terrible,” Sirius laughed. “I didn’t talk to anybody for a solid three years.”

Stella frowned. “How? I think I’d die if I did that.”

“He’s stubborn,” Remus stage-whispered.

“I heard that.”

Stella suppressed her laughter as best she could, but she was about as good at hiding her emotions around them as Sirius was. She didn’t really giggle—the amount her voice had deepened over the past three years always gave Remus whiplash—but her laugh had the same cadence as it did the first day they heard it. While Stella had been quiet at first, it only took love and time to bring her out of her shell. Within a year she settled into their lives like she was always meant to be there.

A thoughtful look crossed her face. “This is my last year before high school.”

“Does it feel different?”

“Not really.” She paused, then shrugged. “And a little. I don’t feel older. It just feels like there’s stuff I won’t get to do anymore.”

“And a lot more you will get to do.” Sirius left his dishtowel on the counter before joining them on Stella’s other side. “You can drive soon, you’ll get a longer curfew, you get more freedom…”

“I guess.”

“What are you going to miss?” Remus asked as she toyed with the hem of her shirt. It was a basic Lions FAN jersey; he was fairly sure she bought it to be ironic. That, and she only wore one of theirs if she was upset with the other, or if one needed a boost at a game.

“I dunno.” A few beats of silence passed. “My classmates. My team. It feels like everything’s going to turn upside down.”

“You can still keep in touch with your friends, and I bet your team won’t be too different,” Sirius said quietly. “Even if it does, that doesn’t mean you have to give all of them up. People change in different ways. They come and go on their own time.”

“There’s going to be a lot of upside-downs over the next couple years, kid.” Remus offered her a smile. “But you’re going to be just fine.”

“You two sound like such dads right now.”

“This might shock you, but that’s because we are.”

The corner of her mouth tugged up and she lolled her head to the side to look at Sirius. “Is the cake done?”

“Fifteen more minutes.”

“Will you watch final Jeopardy with us?”

“What’s the category?”

“US Presidents.”

Sirius exhaled through his nose, but nodded. She grinned and turned herself upright to snuggle against his arm. “You just enjoy watching me lose.”

---------------------------

“Alright, is everyone ready?” Sirius called from the kitchen.

“On three,” Remus said, raising his phone camera. “One, two, three!”

“Happy birthday to you,” over a dozen voices sang. They were off-tempo and so out of key the composer was probably spinning in his grave, but Stella’s clear joy didn’t waver for a millisecond even as her cheeks reddened. “Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Stella, happy birthday to you!”

Finn, of course, dragged out the last note. So did Leo, Logan, Kasey, James, Lily, and Talker in varying degrees of awful harmony attempts. It was terrible, and beautiful. “Make a wish,” Sirius said softly as he set the cake down and stepped back. His eyes were the brightest quicksilver Remus had seen in many moons.

Stella closed her eyes, took a breath, and blew as hard as she could—the entire room erupted into cheers when all the candles went out. She was laughing and blushing at the same time when Remus turned the lights back on, though the humor won out in the end and she helped pass plates of cake to her many aunts and uncles. Like every year prior, Regulus managed to smear a bit of frosting on her chin, only to immediately deny it with great offense when she noticed. It was becoming a bit of a tradition—one that Remus never grew tired of.

I know what I would wish for, Remus thought as he looked around the table at their patchwork family. Celeste, Dumo, and his own parents had no doubt spoiled their first grandchild with ‘cusp of adulthood’ gifts, and Natalie and Lily would certainly steal her away after cake for some girl time. Finn and Logan would remain the fun uncles while Leo and Regulus kept their thrones as the cool uncles; Stella would interrogate Jules on the intricacies of high school for at least an hour before they destroyed everyone in a snowball fight. The world they built together had a place for everyone.

I would wish for this. This, for us, forever. It wasn’t a bad eternity to imagine.

[itsstrawberrymochi]

Hi there! I was wondering if I could request some headcannons of what it would be like to be in a relationship with sanemi, rengoku, and gyomei, separately of course ❤️ thank you I’m advance

Kny characters dating headcanons

YES YES I’ve always wanted to make one of these ^^ to make things better you added some of my favorite boys ~Kyō and Nemi ~ uhhh no offense Gyomei

Also thx for the request @ethereal-tooreal

Rengoku

🔥-He’s a sweet, loving and passionate lover

🔥- He is also a very supportive boyfriend

🔥- If you start something new he’s right behind you every step of the way and he’ll always try to find ways to help you become even better

🔥- Rengoku loves to buy you nice smelling perfumes/colognes,oils or lotions and whenever he hugs you he likes to try and guess what scent you’re wearing

🔥- “ mmmm are you wearing lavender today my love?”

🔥- “Wow Kyō, you’re getting better at guessing”

🔥- Rengoku loves to bring you cute little stuff animals when he comes back from a mission, he especially gets them if they remind him of you

🔥-“Darling look at this stuffed chicken I got you, it reminded me so much of you!”

🔥- “Umm Kyō you think I look like a chicken?”

🔥-“A very cute chicken!”

🔥- Oh so your name is y/n? Yea not anymore when dating Rengoku

🔥- He calls you every single cute name an s/o would call their lover expect your actual name

🔥- So expect him to call you darling, my love or his person favorite my little flame

🔥- If he calls you by your real name be a little bit worried

🔥- Speaking on names, before you two even started dating he always called you y/n-chan because he always admired you and found you cute 🥺

🔥- You’re going to hear me say this more than once but Rengoku is a slut for forehead kisses, because you’re shorter than him and he thinks it’s very convenient

🔥-Rengoku is almost 6’0/ 177 cm so there’s a slim chance you’re taller than him BUT if you are taller than him or the same height he’ll tip-toe to give you the forehead kiss and he never gets embarrassed to do so

🔥-He loves it when you play with his hair, and he doesn’t mind how many colorful or childish clips you put in it

🔥- He loves to take you to festivals for dates and when you two go he buys you literally anything you look at

🔥- He also loves to go restaurant hoping with you, you both decided to try every ramen shop in Japan and to determine which sells the best one

🔥- If you’re a Hasira like him, he’ll always save you a seat near him for pillar meetings

🔥- He loves going on missions with you that way he can spend more time with you and he can protect, but he doesn’t always go and he never makes a fuss about it. Kyō strongly believes in your strength and he knows you can protect yourself

🔥- If you’re not a slayer, and he’s off on missions you and would usually spend your time playing, cooking or baking with Senjurō and sometimes Mitsuri. When he comes back home he just leans on the door way looking and you two and fawning over how adorable the sight is

BONUS

🔥- Since you spend a lot of time at the Rengoku estate his father always has something negative to say about your presence but Rengoku being the amazing lover he is, always defends you and is not afraid to say something back to his father

Sanemi

☁️- He is the definition of a tsundere

☁️- Ok I know we’re all tired of hearing it but it’s TRUE

☁️- He’s so sweet and gentle with you and a literal demon to other people

☁️- He never yells or gets mad at you unlike with others

☁️- And if he does he regrets it after words and immediately apologizes

☁️- Behind close doors Sanemi is extremely clingy and he always wants to be wrapped up around you

☁️- but in public he isn’t like that because he hates PDA, so that means no kissing, hugging or anything of that sorts

☁️- Even though he doesn’t want physical affection in public he’ll still treat you way better than anyone else and is still calm and gentle with you when others are around

☁️- and because it’s Sanemi no one dares call him out on his major shift of behavior towards you

☁️- Sanemi is definitely the listener in the relationship, he much rather you talk about your day than his

☁️- but maybe he’ll rant about how stupid he thinks his Tsugukos and the other pillars are from time to time

☁️- If you’re a demon hunter he’s going on every mission with you, it doesn’t matter if you’re an extremely strong hunter or the weakest he’s still going with you because he wants to protect you

☁️- If you’re not a slayer he’d ask you to move into his estate with him, he doesn’t really care if it’s still the early parts of your relationship he’ll still ask, he asks because you’ll be close to him most of the time and with that he can easily protect you if a demon attacks plus he likes your company but he didn’t tell you that last part

☁️- He also got you a cute little puppy to keep your company while he’s away on mission because he doesn’t want you to be lonely but instead of telling you that he used the excuse it’s to “ protect” the estate from intruders

☁️- Like any normal couple you both have fights and it’s usually about him being overprotective with you, him getting jealous or when he doesn’t listen to you when you tell him to be more careful because he can be very reckless

☁️- To summarize your fights, it’s usually person A is trying to help person B, but person B is too stubborn to realize that

☁️- Sanemi loves to give you hugs from the back, that way you can’t see the smile on his face

☁️- He is the type of s/o who does everything for you but will never admit it

☁️- For example he’ll be the one to buy all the groceries or clean different rooms in the house and when you ask about it he always says you did it and you probably forgot you did

☁️- You and Genya are definitely close, he treats you like an older sibling, Sanemi acts like he hates it but deep down he’s just so happy that the two most important people in his life can get along

☁️- Speaking on Genya he actually had a small crush on you the first time he met you, but it wasn’t serious, he respects his brother and would never make a move on you , the crush was more of an innocent childhood crush

☁️- mmmm how to put this in simpler words........Sanemi is well a bit motherly towards you

☁️- but it doesn’t come off so because he’s so aggressive with it, he always makes you eat all your vegetables or something a strict mother would want their child to do for their well-being

☁️- His motherly nature always comes off as a threat

☁️-“Ok dumbass if you don’t eat all of your greens that’ll be the only thing you can eat for the week”

Or

☁️- “Y/n if you’ve been up for too long go to bed now or I’ll beat you tf up”

☁️-but don’t worry they’re all empty threats..... I think

☁️- Sanemi does anything you ask him to do, so if you want to go to the festival he’ll go but he will mutter out a few complaints on the way

Gyomei

🪨- He’s such a gentle giant

🪨- Because of his large size, at the start of your relationship he was always too scared to hug or kiss you in fear that he may hurt you

🪨- So before any hug or kiss from him he would ask if he can do it, you told him he didn’t have to but it took him while fall out of his habit

🪨- He is very gentle with you but unlike Sanemi he doesn’t mind showing his gentleness with you around others

🪨- He loves hand holding, he really enjoys feeling you warmth against his own

🪨- Plus he has big and soft hands, so hand holding is always a delight

🪨- He strongly believes that a relationship is built on communication and trust

🪨- He is not the type to shy away from his feelings and always tells you how he really feels

🪨- During your relationship you’ll never have to worry about him being dishonest or feel like you two are pulling away from each-other

🪨- Even though he’s been blind for a while and can take care of hisself just fine, he doesn’t get mad if you help him out here or there

🪨- because he is blind he has bit of trouble recognizing who’s walking up to him but he always knows when you wak to him because he memorized the sound of you footsteps

🪨- If you are a slayer he loves helping you train and he’s constantly telling you ways you can improve your breathing style

🪨-Also he’ll rarely go on mission with you, it’s only because he doesn’t want you to depend on him too much and he wants you to become strong on your own, if he ever dies he’ll be glad to know you’re going to be just fine without him

🪨- While you are on your mission he’ll pray for you and your safe return

🪨- If you aren’t a hunter he would train you and teach you his breathing style in his dojo, and it’s not to make you be apart of the demon corps but rather to mane you have a good chance of survival if a demon ever attacks, but if you do want to become a demon hunter he would be against it at first but eventually let you join

🪨- I know this is a dating headcanon butttt once your relationship with him is more mature he’ll definitely ask you to marry him. He’s more of the traditional type so he definitely thought of marriage more than once in your relationship and was very excited to pop the question