#he can have all the freak personal health opinions he wants if he keeps smiling at me like that

[charmac]

i’m new to the fandom and i saw you talk about how the fandom kinda views rob but what about charlie and glenn? what is the general consensus there?

Charlie is definitely the "fan favourite" of the three of them, which is acknowledged by RCG as well (as in, they very much are aware Charlie is way more liked than the two of them are) and it's definitely true. Some combo of Charlie Kelly being the fan-favourite character, Charlie Day's generally cheery demeanor, his insanely broad talent in every aspect of creativity, his support of fan content and shipping (see: Pacific Rim and Macdennis), and every interview he's ever done exemplifying all of that, kinda leads him to being more overwhelmingly liked than Rob or Glenn (plus, all of his social media content is either promo or him being a wholesome husband/dad).

Glenn is more complex, because his moodiness and some of his insane and incessant personal opinions (on food and health, especially) put him in a weird spot with a lot of fans...a huge chunk see him as off-putting or too similar to Dennis that he's scary. BUT that's not really representative of a chunk of the fandom, because that moodiness and his hang ups are kinda seen as the weird girl™ patheticism we see in Dennis that ends up making Glenn...obsessively likeable? Lmao. (And how do I politely work in the fact that he's the most obviously queer one of the three of them...) So the general consensus of Glenn is kinda hard to summarise... he's like manic pixie dream girl for Tumblrinas and a weird out-of-touch white guy to other fans... BUT I will say it seems like the public opinion of Glenn has shifted quite a bit since the start of Four Walls (and the end of the Podcast) in his favour. Who knew handing out free alcohol and getting drunk with fans instead of yapping about how vegetables are slowly killing you could make you more likeable ? (lmao)

I think I have it right generally but anyone can feel free to add on to this or send another ask if they think I'm far off-base, cos again my perspective is definitely affected by my interactions with them.

[miupow]

But now I need werewolf Soobin x reader sfw and nsfw head cannons. I need to know how he would be with his mate pls I beseech thee. If I had money I’d pay you imma get rich so I can pay you to write these

third member down !! will i make ones for yeonjun and taehyun too.. probably if that's what you all would like lol !! having fun making these ^^ and no need to pay me omg anon !!! i love making content for my blog all i ever ask if that i get feedback and support and love <3

─── ⋆ CRAVEVERSE ; werewolf!soobin headcanons !

cw ⸝⸝ sfw + nsfw hcs .ᐟ werewolf!sb (and werewolf!rest of txt) , fem!reader , no dark content warning for these hcs but general dark content warning for crave as an au. breeding kink, size kink, unprotected sex, knotting, possessive and protective behavior

SFW ;

-> crave!soobin who only agrees to keep you because it’s what the others want (at least everyone other than taehyun). if it’s something that would make his brothers happy, than he’s fine with it, but he doesn’t really care much about the new human in his life…

-> except he does. very much so lol

-> crave!soobin who falls for you so fast it makes his head spin, but avoids you like the plague— he doesn’t want to hurt you, keeps his space but remains respectful!! but his resolve is quickly crumbling

-> you think he doesn’t like you but it’s QUITE the opposite!! he likes you so much that he’s.. changing and its freaking him out lol . suddenly he understands his brothers when they go on about their instincts, their ‘wolf’

-> crave!soobin who is the easiest to talk to and reason with because he’s not instinct crazy like his brothers are, can actually think rationally and respect your opinion like you’re a person. he treats you the most like an equal

-> crave!soobin who gets so protective over you it drives him crazy!! he can’t even let you out of his sight without worrying sick about you!! he just needs to make sure you’re safe, okay… not knowing where you are or what you’re up to makes him a nervous wreck

-> crave!soobin who is the most okay with yeonjun claiming that you’re his soulmate or whatever crazy talk he spouts about your destined “love”.. his hyung has a screw loose but he loves him and if you’re what makes him so happy, than he’s happy. he’s okay with being on the side.

-> but crave!soobin who loves attention so much that he doesn’t know what to do when he gets it!! gets all nervous and blushy when you get sweet with him !! because while he’s okay with not being your number 1 he’s still down horrendously for you

-> crave!soobin who has trouble sleeping and has had nightmares and insomnia for years… but who can finally sleep easy with you cuddled into his side <3

-> crave!soobin who would do absolutely anything you asked, just because seeing you smile is his favorite thing in the world ! always always thinking about you, your happiness, health and safety always on his mind <3

NSFW ; (under the cut!)

-> i touch on this a little in my old soobin drabble for crave but crave!soobin is a little bit of a late bloomer.. in that he’s never had a rut or really had any awakening of his instincts even as the second oldest. unlike his brothers he feels no kind of instinctual pull that guides them, feels more human than werewolf, like something’s wrong with him. but that all changes when you come into his life…

-> crave!soobin who goes into rut for the first time a few moons after you become part of his life, but who holes himself away in his room to ride it out alone just because he’s so frightened of hurting you.

-> he’s so much.. bigger than you. and he doesn’t know how to control himself. it’s all so new to him.

-> crave!soobin who has the biggest breeding kink of them all !! always daydreaming about getting your tummy round with his pups, can’t stop himself from babbling about breeding you when he’s balls deep inside <3

-> crave!soobin who loves titties w all his big wolfish heart <3 always sucking on your tits whenever he has the chance !

-> crave!soobin who won’t stop, can’t stop until he’s drained himself of everything he’s got, overstimulating u both ^^

-> crave!soobin who has the biggest cock in the pack and who is a little insecure about it,. just so convinced he’ll hurt you poor baby!!

-> on that note crave!soobin who’s the most submissive out of the boys, who likes being told what to do, bossed around, topped and dominated hehe

[ninyard]

Heyy! You said someone should ask you about Kevin under this post about Kevin's struggles from the nest of which we don't know enough... So I'm asking you about Kevin! Please tell us your Kevin thoughts! You always make very good points and I like reading your thoughts!!

cody my friend I am so glad you asked but you might regret it. i hope you're prepared from an unorganised huge convoluted MESS of a ramble

i've been thinking for a few days about this one like... what would a kevin POV look like? what is he hiding? how does he cope? WHO IS HE?

the kevin we ""know"" is a "coward", an insufferable bitch, an asshole and a hardass. other people's opinions and view of him makes up the entirety of our impression of who he is. but that's not who he is. that's just who we're supposed to believe he is.

kevin, born and bred to have this... borderline psychopathic lack of empathy, who can look his teammates in the eye after being told seth is dead or andrew is being committed and say, "what about the game?"

but when the raven's are switching districts; his sense of danger and fear is paralysing. he's three steps ahead trying to figure out how to please riko, how to keep himself safe, willing to put himself back into the centre of his abuse just to stop riko from finding him and killing him. he has to get blackout drunk to deal with any amount of riko. he's frozen with fear by being in the same room as him.

kevin knows where jean's mind and body goes to when hes panicking, knowing his worst place is right back in the nest being drowned by riko. kevin telling neil "do you know what he'll do to you?" and "he'll break you" when neil asks for his ticket. kevin's text to him before he goes into the nest, and staring at neil like he'd seen a ghost when neil returns after the nest (when he looks like the butcher). his comforting "i know what he's like" or "i know how he sees you, i know it means he did not hold back,".

kevin nervous breakdown panic attack day vs kevin smile for the cameras one track exy mind day

im so intrigued by him. how does he cope? his mother is dead, probably killed by the mafia family he was raised by. he grew up into a cult, he was only a child watching neil's father cut a man into pieces in front of him. how many other's had he seen?

how many other injuries cover his body, in places where the cameras can't see? how many rapes and assaults was he forced to watch in the nest? how many beatings was he forced to participate in? what did he have to say to jean in french that he didn't want riko to hear?

he needs someone with him all the time because of the nest. he's a "health freak" because of the nest. his sleep schedule, his anger, his anxiety.

did he say "what about the season?" re: andrew after drake because he doesn't care, or did he think "i've seen this happen too many times. and they've always kept playing,"? did he think "andrew is the strongest person i know. andrew is stronger than me. he would never let this destroy him," knowing that it has?

nobody has protected him in his life apart from the cameras and andrew.

he's scared. he doesn't know what love is supposed to look like.

he's only been a human for a year.

his scars are healing for the first time in his life and they're not being replaced by new ones, but every day he's afraid that that's going to get ripped out from underneath him. his entire life already got flipped upside down when he left the nest. of course exy is the only thing he "cares" about.

because it's the only thing that's been certain in his life, and even for those few weeks or months where he thought he would never play again, he trained and trained, and learned how to use his non-dominant hand because he can't lose this. he can't lose exy like he's lost everything else.

kevin has never had anything stable in his life except for violence and exy. now he has people he's supposed to care about, and he has to change his priorities. he has to learn how live a life that isn't fueled by self-preservation for the first time ever.

jean was only in the nest for five years; and look at him. look at what the nest has done to his social skills, his view of himself, his self esteem. look at what it's done to him, how he expects violence and contrition, coach and always waiting and waiting and waiting for the punishment to come.

kevin might not have had the same level of physical abuse that jean had, but he was there far longer. the ravens existed before him; their mindset and their abuse and their violence and their poison.

he's been drinking the raven poison since his childhood. the only difference between him and jean other than those things above is that kevin had more pressure to hide it, because he was half of the face of the ravens, half of the face of Exy; media trained or PR trained or a master at being a fraud and faking the way he speaks when he's being recorded.

kevin knows how to hide his abuse because he has always had to, and he's had quite a lot of practice at it.

kevin has only been a human for a year. kevin has only been kevin for a year.

so who is he? does he even know?

or is he just Kevin Day, Raven Fox starting striker, number two, six foot two, left handed right handed left handed, heavy racquet, stick size five? is that all he will ever see himself as?

anyways. or something like that. maybe he is just an insufferable bitch for no reason at all. who knows!

[jmnxjmnx]

Here's an unpopular opinion.

I have seen so many fans getting head over heels towards Eddie Munson and Chrissy Cunningham's chemistry in the forest. Even the Duffers admitted to regret killing her and so on and so forth. Don't take me wrong, but y'all just be exaggerating a bit.

I love Chrissy from the second she appeared as a cheerleader blowing a kiss to her *actual* boyfriend, basketball team captain Jason. She has this warm smile that is able to melt anyone, not gonna lie, plus the actress is gorgeous! Of course she deserved to be alive. The show indeed showed us how bad her life actually was and how this affected her mind until it became pathetically weak for Vecna to reach it out. But that's a whole other point. Then we got awesome, cute, hot Eddie, a metalhead and a freak who has repeat three times his senior year. Let's be honest: Eddie is an adult who really couldn't care less about his future (of course he does, but let's talk about how the show is portraying him AT the moment and not about how US, the fans, see him). Eddie is a fucking dealer, therefore, a criminal. In whatever country you go, this action is illegal, even more if you are dealing to a MINOR.

Chrissy, already said, had a boyfriend. There's not so much insight on her relationship with Jason but for what we could see, they were romantic with each other, although it kinda made it pretty clear that she has never opened up to anyone but Eddie. She didn't trust her boyfriend her problems or her visions (at least until what the series has showed us, maybe in the Vol. 2 this could be another whole thing and maybe Jason did know about her suffering and her eating disorders problems, but personally and as how he describes her as a "good, perfect girl", I highly doubt he knew something). She talks to Eddie because she knows he's a dealer and maybe he has something to help her. Here's my point, there's nothing special about the two of them talking in the woods and y'all being so weird. Here's why:

She reaches to Eddie because of drugs, not because she feels something towards him.

Eddie is thrilled to deal to her because he, just like Jason, knew the perfect side of Chrissy, nothing more than that and has never been in love with her or anything similar to it.

Both of them thought the worst of themselves, clarifying the "terrifying, scary" and "mean" adjectives. Negative ones.

She barely remembered him from previous years and he just remember talking to her ONCE, then, for him, she has just been the Hawkins High School Queen. Nothing more.

Again, the age. Is not my shit honestly because I LOOOOOVE older guys, so is not to judge. This point is more about how he is a criminal who probably has 20-21 years old and is selling/trying to sell drugs to youngsters who, like Chrissy, had trouble to stay mentally healthy. (I know this is an 80s based show, and mental health at that time wasn't really the trending topic of the decade, but y'all need to see how wrong is to ship them).

Chrissy needed someone to talk to. She needed advices. She didn't need drugs. When she talks to Eddie, both of them just shared their surprise to find out that they can actually hang out and how wrong their thoughts of each other were. And the only part that Eddie responded to her question, was a vague response with a brutal topic change.

Eddie just wants to sell her drugs, that's all he wants. He even lowered the price to her because flattering works with him. He wasn't really interested in her at all more than just having a client. And no, inviting her to watch his band isn't something really meaningful nor special, doesn't mean love is in the air.

Chrissy also wasn't interested in Eddie at all. She was just interested in having something stronger so that she could deal with her pain. Thats it. If she left Jason waiting for her in his party was because she was holding into the tiniest hope of keeping her status as the good, perfect girl, and it happened that Eddie "had" what she thought she "needed".

I love all the FanArt created towards them, and as a viewer I loved their chemistry as well. I would love to think that both Joe and Grace became really good friends after their shoots together because they could have really become a wonderful couple in the series. They had way more chemistry in 5 minutes than what Nancy and Jonathan had these four seasons (and to think that Natalia and Charlie are even dating for 6 years now).

But when you look at the signs and at that special scene again, and again, it just made it clear that definitely Eddie and Chrissy were never meant to be, not even as friends, how important was her death to happen and how damned damaged y'all are to be shipping a dealer with a minor just because "they had chemistry". I mean I ship them too but RED FLAGS ARE THERE, WAKE UP PEOPLE.

And the worst part of all of this shit, is that Eddie will always remember Chrissy in a disgusting memory of herself at his trailer roof with no eyes and all broken bones. And also, that I can't sleep, that's really a bad side.

Honestly I would have loved them to date but life's hard, and besides that would have been soooo fucking cliché: "the weirdo metalhead freak dates the Queen Bee", or whatever adjective people from the 80s used to describe the typical blond popular girls. I'm glad the Duffers gave us a hint of what their relationship could have been like and then killed her off as if there's no tomorrow.

So this is my unpopular opinion. Now I'll be back onto reading fanfics about Eddie because irl, I couldn't love him more and more now that he's single huh.

[softyoongiionly]

Portraits of a Tiger - The Finale

Legends of a great and equally terrifying warrior nicknamed the Tiger have been emerging from your fellow villagers for quite sometime. Stories of his skill, his stealth and his supposed wickedness have been passed around to the point where he is more prophecy than person. You have lived your life with a strong sense of conviction, rarely letting gossip influence your opinion. However, you would be lying if you said that his legacy didn’t intrigue you. When the Tiger and his infamous army arrive in your village to refuel, you come face to face with the man behind the myth.

And no amount of marketplace gossip would ever be enough to capture the true complexity of his nature.

Pairing: Merchant! Reader x Warrior! Yoongi

Genre: Adventure, Romance, Smut, Fluff, Angst, not intended to be a historical au. 

Word Count: 28k

Warnings: depictions of violence, death, blood, choking, mentions of battle, heavy angst (happy endings only), LONGING, explicit language, mentions of grief, mentions of loss, mentions of insecurity, explicit smut: scratching, biting, lovebites, unprotected sex. 

A/N: welp :( This is the end for now folks. I can’t believe I finally finished a series on this freakin’ blog lol. I am so incredibly grateful for your patience. I truly hope you enjoy it and if you do, I would love to hear from you. Whilst this is the end of the series, I wouldn’t be surprised if I wrote drabbles for it in the future so, if there is anything you’d like to see more of, please let me know :D

A few thank you notes to my sisters from across the globe @yoonia​ and @randombtsprincessa​, the two of you are so important to me and, I am forever grateful for your friendship. I love you lots. 

To @kithtaehyung @missgeniality​ @noelleydances​ thank you for always hyping me up and, being willing to chat with silly ol me. You’re all amazing and I LOVE YOU ALOT.

To @gldnrecs LISTEN IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW, LAY. I am so thankful you and, your willingness to scream with me in my dms. I’m so honored to know you and, I hope you know that I am always here if you need anything. ALSO HAPPY COLLEGE GRADUATION YOU FREAKING GENIUS. Please consider this (and Hobi’s conclusion specifically) my graduation present. Love you. 

Love letter to Rachel: It’s very important for anyone who comes across this story to know that I would have NEVER EVER EVER be able to conjure up this universe without the help of my bestie @bulletproofbirdy​. My friend, you are a genius and, it has truly been such an honor designing this world with you. I am so grateful that I’ve been able to create something with someone as amazing as you but, ON TOP OF IT??? We became so close that we literally talk every single day. I don’t know what to say without being the mushiest person ever but, I just want to thank you for being you. Without your love, your support and your BIG BRAIN, I would have never finished this series. I hope it lives up to all of your expectations. I love you. 

The clouds hung in the air with a heaviness that was almost palpable. Storm season was looming over the horizon and, although you’re aware that the rain is more than overdue, you still feel a sense of doom clinging to your subconscious. This time of year, arrives like clockwork and your village is well-equipped to deal with all the rainfall, the thunder, the lightening...

But there was always a chance that the river would flood and thus there was always a chance for tragedy to strike; a chance for everything you’ve ever known to be swallowed whole. You know you can’t stop a flood. The water operates on its own axis, untethered by human convenience. It terrifies you yes but, you’re fascinated none the less.

With a deep sigh, you step away from the edge of the river. The soft bubbling of the water is intriguing you, eliciting a yearning within you to step inside just one last time. However, you know the bite of the water would be too much to handle on your bare feet and you really don’t want to catch a cold before the winter season has even started.

Turning around, the breath you are preparing to take gets lodged deep in the center of your throat. It’s Yoongi and he’s reaching out for you but the look of pain on his face alerts you that something is horribly wrong.

“Y/n...” He croaks, his eyes wide with fear as he reaches out to you and it’s then that you see the blood dripping from his fingers. Your eyes frantically travel down his figure before realizing the source of the blood.

A wound similar to that of a sword brandishes his lower stomach, staining his tunic and causing the bile in your stomach to swirl uncomfortably.

He’s hurt.

He’s hurt badly.

“Yoongi!” You cry to him, your heartbeat rising to a level that feels painful.

As you try to run to him however, he falls to his knees, the life sparking in his eyes one last time before he collapses.

The scream coming from your lips is unrecognizable but, thankfully it draws you upright in your bed, informing you that horrible scene you just witnessed, was only a dream.

You clutch your hand to your chest, breathing heavily, your eyes stinging as they well up with tears. Without thinking, you sob into the clasped hand over your lips, trying your best to calm down but the morbid images continue to assault your mind over and over.

The light streaming in through your window, informs you that the sun has risen. At least your nightmare had allowed you to sleep a full night before rudely interrupting. You swallow back another sob, forcing a deep breath through your nose while you remind yourself that Yoongi is ok.

But you can’t know that for sure, can you?

The small break in your logic is enough to make you rush out of bed and into your coat, not bothering to fix your appearance as you shove your feet into your shoes. Thankfully, your parents are still sleeping soundly in their beds when you bustle through the main room and towards the door.

You have to see for yourself; even a glimpse of him could loosen the grip that fear currently has on your mind. You take the back way to avoid the marketplace which already shows signs of coming to life. You would need to make it quick to avoid missing the morning crowd: that’s usually where most of your sale’s come from.

With everything in you, you hope that he’s already awake because if he isn’t, you’d just have to move on without the reassurance, which is what you should do anyway, but you can’t bring yourself to let it go.

Thankfully, Yoongi is awake and by the looks of it, he’s out with the new recruits, running drills in the grass right in front of their camp. You see Jungkook out there as well, assisting one of the men with his form as he brandishes a sword.

The sight floods your mind with images of your dream once again, causing you to squeeze your eyes shut.

He’s ok though, so regardless of the images, you feel content seeing him in good health. Logically, you know you need to go about your day and allow him to go about his but, as you move to turn back towards the village- he notices you.

At first, a smile passes over his lips almost involuntarily but, his keen observation skills notice something is array. You see him gesture to his men to continue before he starts making his way in your direction.

Embarrassment washes over you without any warning and you try and wave him off, reassuring him that everything is ok, but he ignores it and jogs over anyway.

“Good morning-” He murmurs, his hands reaching out for yours. As he laces his fingers between your own, he tilts his head, “Are you ok?”

Instinctively, you nod but when you open your mouth to say something, nothing comes out.

Glancing up towards his face, your eyes pass over the area your mind brandished with blood and, without thinking, you throw your arms around him.

Yoongi is a little taken aback but he reciprocates nonetheless, his arms encircling you and pressing you against his chest. You feel a sigh of relief leave your lips as you cling to his robe, breathing in the subtle scent of him.

“I just wanted to make sure you were ok.”

The whisper of your voice sends an aching into his chest and although you don’t disclose exactly what happened, Yoongi trusts that you had a valid reason for checking on his well-being.

With a soft smile, he presses a kiss to your temple, “I feel a little more than ok now...” He confirms before pulling back to look into your eyes, “May I do my own wellness check?”

There is a playfulness to his tone that softens the hard exterior of your residual panic and you bite your bottom lip when you nod.

His expression grows pensive as he holds your chin between his thumb and forefinger. He tilts your face from left to right, his own head following the motions whilst he narrows his eyes,

“Hm, nothing out of the ordinary here...” He grins, his blonde hair rustling slightly with the pace of the wind, eyes alight with fondness, “Still beautiful- still curious, still driving me insane because, I don’t know what’s going through her head...”

A small bit of laughter leaves your lips as you slide your hand up his forearm before settling gently on his wrist. With your fingertips, you press lightly against the bone beneath his skin, relishing in any tangible part of him you can touch, “I had a nightmare about you.”

He purses his lips together, rubbing his thumb over your cheek, “Did I turn into a tiger and try to eat you? My men have told me they had this dream quite a lot during training...”

Yoongi attempts to keep his tone playful but he looks slightly deflated now as he waits for your response.

With a small smile, you shake your head tightly. You take his hand away from your chin, lacing your fingers together, ensuring that the grip you have on him is tight.

“No. You were-”A sigh leaves your lips whilst you shake your head, “You were hurt.” You spare him the details, “I woke up and just started running over here to make sure you were ok...it’s a bit silly now that I’m thinking of it.”

Yoongi can’t help but smile at you, his heart flourishing with the promise new romance often makes. He is saddened that you were worried on his account but, he would be lying if he said that this wasn’t endearing.

Ok- so perhaps it was extremely endearing.

“And if I wasn’t ok?” He wraps his arms around you, “Would you have come to my rescue?”

The smirk on his lips makes him all the more handsome and the feeling of his hands on the small of your back, makes your mind fuzzier than you’d care to admit.

“I would have-” Your voice grows higher with determination which causes Yoongi to chuckle, shaking his head in disbelief, “Why are you laughing???? Do you doubt my ability to hold my own on the battlefield?”

Yoongi’s laughter is choppy and warm, it soothes every sore spot of anxiety in your head in almost medicinal way.

You wish you could hear the sound more.

“Absolutely not.” He shakes his head, still chuckling a bit, “In fact, I think you’d make a fine solider, ma'am. It’s just-” He glances down at your feet, “I don’t usually recommend wearing house slippers on the battlefield.”

The rolling of your eyes, brings Yoongi’s laughter back into the conversation.

“I would have managed just fine, thank you. You underestimate how powerful house slippers can be when brandished by the right person.”

He raises his brows, “Is that right? You wouldn’t need a sword then? Just your slippers?”

“Mhm.” You grumble with certainty, your fingers finding the ends of the hair hanging down from his pony tail, “My slippers and my wit are more powerful than any weapons you have here.”

Yoongi chuckles, the sound low and slow in the base of his throat, “Now that sounds a bit more realistic- that mouth of yours would certainly be enough to guarantee your victory.”

As he’s replying, you’re gently tracing your fingertips up the length of his spine, admiring the strength clearly present in the muscles of his back.

“Hm-” You muse, stealing a look directly into his eyes, “I do hope to show you what my mouth is capable of someday-” Fluttering your lids innocently, you try to stop the smirk from taking over your mouth but, when Yoongi’s grip tightens on you, it takes over anyway.

Drawing a deep breath through his nose, you see his Adam’s apple bob in the center of his throat as his jaw fills up with tension. An audible swallow comes from him as his gaze slowly shifts from playful to perturbed.

“I find it ironic that you’ve chosen to threaten my wellbeing…whilst in the middle of a wellness check …”

You hum with a sense of false innocence, “I haven’t the faintest idea of what you’re talking about.”

“You’re dangerous” He murmurs, and you don’t miss the lust that coats his voice, “and unarmed...” A chuckle leaves his lips then as he presses his hands further into your skin, “and in your house slippers. I think you might be the biggest threat I’ve ever encountered.”

This makes you giggle now, dropping the salacious tone from your voice but, as you lean up to press a kiss to his lips- a voice brings your motions to a halt.

“General Tiger! Are you going to join your men for training this morning or were you planning on teaching them the art of seduction?”

It’s Jin and he’s stood outside their tent with his arms crossed. It’s then that you notice the lack of movement in his camp. Most of the recruits were sort of standing around awkwardly, many of them sneaking a glance at the two of you.

They look rather shocked at Jin’s choice of words, expecting Yoongi’s wrath but instead he merely smirks and leans in so his lips are at your ear before whispering, “We’ll talk about this later...”

His slightly menacing tone sends excitement rushing into your chest as you reluctantly pull away from him.

You salute him, “Yes sir.”

Yoongi forces a breath out of his nostrils, shaking his head at you, “You’re going to kill me one day.” He mutters to himself as he practically saunters back to his camp.

Yoongi is still smirking as he returns amidst his group of men, which Jin promptly comments on.

“Even after a decade with you, you still surprise me.” He notes, his tongue running along the inside of his cheek.

“Third line, run those last two again! I need you sharper than that!” Yoongi calls out to his men, replacing his commanding expression with one full of nonchalance, “What are you referring to?”

Jin merely nods to the place the two of you had just been canoodling in, “I wasn’t sure that I’d ever see the day you took a partner- let alone the day that you’d publicly display affection for one. I wouldn’t necessarily think to question it but-”

Yoongi smirks, his eyes on the men in front of him but his focus clearly elsewhere, “And yet here you are...”

Jin rolls his eyes, “You can’t possibly blame me. I mean, you have a reputation that spans across the entirety of this land- does it concern you that they might mark you as vulnerable? From what I’ve gathered around the plaza, many of these villagers have already began to view you more casually.”

Yoongi’s smirk never fades as he calls out another command to the recruits, “If an enemy brands me as vulnerable- that is an error on their end, not on mine. In fact, I imagine it would bode quite well for me in the end. In regard to the villagers viewing me in a certain light- I can’t say I mind. Being feared was never something I asked for- you know this well. I would hope that more of the people I’ve served find me approachable.”

Jin doesn’t look convinced, knowing Yoongi far too well to believe that this was the end of his explanation, “There is more to it than that, isn’t there?”

“What do you mean?”

“You have other motives for being so open about her.”

Yoongi tilts his head in thought, still not bothering to look at him, “I just don’t think it hurts to send a message, to anyone who might be observing us.”

Jin scoffs at his vagueness, attempting eye contact, “What message might that be?”

Finally, Yoongi turns towards him, the ghost of his previous smirk on his mouth, “That she is both protected and accounted for.”

With that, Yoongi draws his sword and heads back amongst the large crowd of men who, having finished their drills, were now eagerly awaiting his instruction.

Jin finds himself smirking as well now, undeniably intrigued by his general’s newfound attitude.

Your day in the marketplace moves slowly but, you find yourself largely unphased. With a mind full of budding romance and unresolved passion, it’s difficult to focus on the mundanity of everyday life.

“So- “ Jane begins, with a curious gaze as the two of you begin packing up your wares for the day, “I’ve seen you over at the military camp quite a lot these past few weeks...”

Unable to resist, you roll your eyes at her observation whilst lining your bags with your belongings, “I’ve been making bread for the battalion.”

You’ve learned over the years of working with Jane that keeping your responses to a minimum is a good idea, particularly when she decides to fish for information.

She has an impressive habit of picking your words apart in search of anything potentially scandalous.

“Oh? So I suppose canoodling with their leader is just a part of your services then?”

With wide eyes, your head whips in her direction, “What do you mean?”

Jane chuckles, smoothing her hands over the many fly aways atop her head, “The man clearly moves as though a burden has been lifted from him and, given the way he looks at you every time he visits our plaza- I have no choice but to assume that you were the one to do so.”

Most of the time, you’d shy away from her attempts to gossip but, you’re in a bit of a mood after your earlier encounter with Yoongi so, you decide to give her something to work with. “I am a healer Jane, if I can lift the burden of stress from my patrons- I won’t shy away from the opportunity.”

It’s her turn to widen her eyes now as she chokes back the small gasp coming from her throat, “Are you- are you saying it’s true then? You’ve laid with the Tiger?”

In an almost child-like manner, you giggle to yourself, glancing over at her briefly, “Is it still considered lying with him if I were pressed up against a tree?”

Jane’s face shines like a summer tomato, fit to burst, as she hustles closer to you, “My girl!” She whispers, “What has gotten into you?”

Brushing off leftover debris from your cart, you turn towards her, “Well according to your theory-” You wager, “I suppose it was the Tiger,” You smirk, “Wasn’t it?”

Jane smacks your arm now, causing your laughter to increase in volume, “Y/N! I am shocked by you-” She begins before her features seem to morph back into her previous curiosity, “and slightly impressed...I thought I was the only whore around here.”

“Jane!” You swat her arm now, shaking your head at her and trying your best not to laugh, “Aren’t you married?”

She shrugs, a smirk now present on her lips, “I am but-” She eyes her husband, who is obliviously untangling his fishing line across the plaza, “Morris and I are well-acquainted...” She allows the word to drop from her mouth like maple syrup, “with other members of the village.”

Did she just-

“Whatever satisfies your heart and mind, Jane. I’m glad you and Morris are active community members...” You wave her off, giggling once again and desperately hoping she won’t divulge any further details, “I’ll see you tomorrow...stay out of trouble.”

“Don’t give me advice you know I won’t take Y/N...” She chuckles loudly before calling her husband, “Oh Morris! Don’t forgot we have plans with the minister and his wife this evening!”

Morris’s eyes widen, seeming to understand the hidden implication behind her words as he puts his index finger to his lips in an effort to silence her.

With that disturbing piece of information, you rush out of the plaza before you learn anything else that has the capability of scaring you for life.

Before heading to Rachel’s with her steamed buns, you decide to stop at the library to check out the new arrivals from the Queen’s province. Every month or so, they send new copies of the latest publishing from the capital and, given how coveted they are- you always try to make it to the library on the day of delivery.

You’re able to snag a title on growing herbs in the wintertime before spotting someone you’ve been quite eager to see: Rachel.

You find her perusing the history section, completely unaware of her presence even as you slink up beside her, “Oh hi there- fancy meeting you here; how was meeting your new student?”

Jumping slightly at the unexpected interruption, she pivots towards you before her eyes narrow with accusation, “Oh NO you don’t!” She chides, though her red cheeks suggest something else, “I cannot believe you used my love of teaching to stage a romantic COUP in my own schoolroom!” She rants, eyes wild with disbelief.

Ignoring her completely, you lean against the shelf- admiring the scent of the parchment before repeating your question, “Uh huh yeah-” You dismiss, “How did it go?”

“It went...” She clears her throat, mindlessly running her fingers over the spines resting on the shelves, “very well- it went very well.”

Looking at her expectantly, you raise your brows, “Can you define ‘well’ for the courts please?”

Rachel’s eyes seem to light up all over again as they drift into her story, “I never thought a man like that could be interested in such a quiet life like mine...we hardly know each other but, there is such kindness and passion in his eyes...it feels like I’ve known him for years.”

Seeing your best friend so enamored warms your heart; if anyone deserved happiness in this world, it would be her.

She goes on to tell you everything that happened between the two of them, recounting the nervous glances, flushed cheeks and a romantic confession from Bambi with the biceps himself.

At her conclusion, you’re unable to help the excited squeal that leaves your lips as you wrap your arms around her flushed frame, “I’m so happy for you!!!” Your scream comes out as an excited whisper, not wanting to feel the wrath of the librarian before you recall her earlier comment, “I think your quiet life and impeccable charm is what drew him in, in the first place...” You nudge her playfully, “You should have seen him talking about you- even I was swooning.”

She glows brighter, her figure emanating a bright carnation as she smoothly changes the subject; Rachel will only take the spotlight for so long, “Speaking of swooning, how is that ferocious general for yours, eh?”

Suddenly, you become very interested with a book on the shelf beside you, “Hm? What general? I don’t know a general Rachel, I’m just a silly little medicine woman.”

Her eyes widen as she smacks you playfully, “APOTHECARY!” She corrects and, the two of you giggle like schoolchildren as the librarian shoots daggers in your direction, “Don’t play coy with me- I spilled my guts about Jungkook. Fair is fair.”

Resigned, you let out a sigh and try to contain all of your emotions towards the subject, “Fiiiiine. The general simply explained that...” you look around to make sure no one is listening before lowering your voice, “that the reason we haven’t, hmmm what’s the word-” You pause once more, looking rather pensive, “defiled one another yet, is because he wants to wait until he has no more distractions. Which basically means we must wait until retirement, which of course also means- I am likely to go insane.”

Rachel snorts, slapping a hand over her mouth in an effort to conceal with laughter, “Wow he is serious about his intimacy.” She comments as she places a hand on your shoulder, “It’s been nice knowing you. I will tell the world your story.”

Slumping against her, you groan, feeling the full weight of your impatience, “If you’re wondering whether or not he still kisses me passionately beneath the moonlight despite the fact that he wants to wait- the answer is a resounding yes.” You explain, matter of factly, “it’s like he is wishing for the destruction of my sanity...”

Rachel links arms and giggles once again, “Look at us hm? Being pined for by heroes like in the poems that line these shelves...” She nods to them, “Who have thought?”

“I am slightly regretting all of my daydreams involving a knight in shining armor- who would have thought there would be so much yearning?”

She merely laughs again, shaking her head at you, “Have you two discussed his retirement?”

You nod, “His entire battalion is retiring this year. He said it should be around the wintertime, all of them have been in service for 10 years, including Jungkook.”

“That’s incredible: ten years of such a hard life. I couldn’t imagine. Do you know what they will do?”

“That means Jungkook joined the queen’s army before he was of age,” You observe, furrowing your brow, “I imagine they will retire with their chosen partners. Yoongi said that, that was his plan at least-” Your voice turns slightly coy at the end, “I don’t imagine they will have to work for the rest of their lives. My parents always talk about how well taken care of decorated soldiers are.”

Rachel’s face falls, “I’m just imagining Jungkook choosing this life at such a young age...the things those men have seen and, the rough life they have in service to the two queens...” She shakes her head, “I hope they all find peace and happiness, no matter what they choose.”

You nod, resting your head on her shoulder, “I think they have made their choices already- it all depends on if their partners reciprocate their advances.”

Rachel nudges you when she hears your teasing tone, “Quiet down you, we’re in the library...”

After much more giggling and, gushing over the men that have stolen your hearts, the two of you part ways.

Rachel has an evening to prepare for after all...

She rushes home after her time at the library. The books she gathered for her lesson on Monday are carefully placed on her bookshelf and, the ingredients for tonight’s meal are sprawled out on her countertop.

As she begins the long process of preparing for her night with Jungkook, she allows her mind to wander to a place she seldom visits: the past.

Like most people, she finds indulging in this subject to be quite the slippery slope. Today, she finds herself remembering a time where finding love seemed like nothing more than an elaborate fantasy. Rachel is a brilliant woman yes, but she has mistakenly branded herself as invisible for most of her life.

Now, she is faced with the reality that not only does someone see her but, they are enamored with her.

It’s slightly terrifying.

Another quiet breath is pulled through her nose then as she smooths her hands over her dress once more.

Glancing back towards the home she’s shared with herself over the years, a small smile comes over her face as she realizes that she might need to get used to the idea of sharing.

But then again, it will be nice to have someone around during the winter...

Especially when that someone has biceps like Jungkook.

Rachel waves at a group of students who scream her name excitedly from across the street whilst desperately hoping that they don’t try to follow her to her destination.

With another deep breath, she begins heading out of the market plaza and into the deep emerald of the clearing just before the camp. Normally around this time, she would be heading there with Y/N to deliver bread but, tonight she takes a sharp left into forest.

She had given Jungkook instructions on how to get there and he had then insisted on getting there before her to set things up. Rachel realized at that moment that her ability to refuse him was at a minimum, especially when he flashed those beautiful eyes her way.

Curse him and his ethereal beauty.

Narrowing her eyes slightly, she navigates through the maze of trees as the sound of running water slowly makes its way into her ears. A smile comes across her lips then, as she realizes she’s getting close.

The sun is beginning to take the minimal warmth of the day with it as it begins its descent towards the horizon and, she feels slightly regretful that she chose to meet with him around sunset.

Sometimes you have to sacrifice body heat for the ambience.

As she nears one of the many pools that come off of the main river, she finally sees Jungkook waiting for her. Slowly but surely, she can make out his appearance for the evening and as she does, her heart swoons.

He’s standing somewhat awkwardly at the edge of a large tan woolen blanket, dressed in a red tunic and red cloth pants, with his onyx locks freshly washed and curling in various directions atop his head. She sees him swallow at the sight of her, the tiniest of smiles etching onto his lips.

“Good evening.” He bows slightly, gesturing to her, “You look- um, you look very nice.”

She returns his smile, fingers clutching the basket of food a bit tighter, “Good evening. I could say the same to you, red looks really great on you.”

His stance seems to light up at her compliment, the tiny smile growing, “That’s what my hyungs said, I wasn’t sure if it was too much but, if you like it then-” He nods, cringing at how nervous he feels, “-then that’s good.”

Rachel bites her lip, noticing his nerves immediately, “I love it,” She assures him before raising the basket up, “I brought dumplings. I wasn’t sure what kind you liked so I brought a few different ones.”

At the mention of food, the tension within his figure seems to dissipate.

“I can’t wait to try them,” He grins now as he gestures to the blanket, “You can sit wherever you’d like, I can take those from you-” He shakes his head then, regretting his choice of words, “No wait... here-” He is gentle as he takes the basket from her before turning around to set it carefully on the blanket. He then reaches out with his palm extended, “I’ll help you down...”

Her heart bursts.

It seems she isn't the only one flooded with nervous excitement.

“Thank you-” She insures to heighten the gratitude within her tone, wanting to soothe his anxiety in any way she can, despite feeling so much of her own.

He plops next to her in a less graceful manner then he would have hoped as he looks regretfully toward his canteen, “We don’t have an extra canteen in the camp. They were all given away to the new recruits. I would have brought you your own but, I washed mine for you and filled it up. I can drink from the river over there.”

“Oh goodness no, you don’t have to do that-” She shakes your head, pulling out her canteen from the basket, “I figured you would have had your own; I should have brought you one just in case though-”

“No really, it’s ok! I can just use mine.” Once again, he cringes, “I guess it’s a bit strange that I would have thought you’d want to drink from mine...I don’t know what I was thinking.”

At the rather innocent pout on his lips, he looks up at her- feeling slightly hopeless.

A bit of silence lingers in the air for a moment before Rachel giggles and at the sound, Jungkook’s lips twitch.

“It’s not a good sign that you’re already laughing-” He laments, the smiling that was threatening his mouth fully taking over, “Even though I quite like hearing it...”

Rachel places a cautious hand over Jungkook’s knuckles, relishing in the warmth of his skin, “I promise you it is-“ She disagrees, “It’s important that I’m around people I can laugh with- even if its at our own expense sometimes…”

The corner of Jungkook’s mouth turns up in a half smile, “That might work out in my favor then- my hyungs say I appear one way but, behave another…I guess that’s why I feel so nervous now…”

He looks up at her quite innocently through his long eyelashes as Rachel furrows her brow, “What do you mean?”

Jungkook’s fingers are now aimlessly toying with the bit of loose thread and, with her heightened sense of empathy, Rachel can sense that he is burdened in some way.

“I am slightly afraid that you will be disappointed when you get to know me…” He admits.

This shocks Rachel as she cannot imagine how someone as beautiful as Jungkook could lack confidence in any capacity. But still, she feels the urge to understand him.

“Well, I don’t want to discount your worries Mr. Jeon but, “ She tilts her head slightly, a hint of sternness in her gaze, “I sincerely doubt your ability to disappoint me.”

Jungkook’s cheeks begin to burn all over again; there is something about the way her lips look curving around the words ‘Mr. Jeon’ that he stores away for a later time.

“Aren’t I already different than what you expected?” He chuckles, and the sound is boyish and full of airiness but, it still holds a bit of tension.

He was right.

He was much different than she had anticipated but that isn’t saying much, considering the fact that her first impression of him came after he took down a group of raiders.

“Different doesn’t always mean disappointment…” She assures him candidly, “In fact, I am quite relieved that you aren’t what I expected.”

He is intrigued, “Most of the people I meet are afraid of me but, I can’t say I blame them; My hyungs and I come with a reputation. Were you afraid of us when we came here?”

Jungkook wants to know what she thinks, even if he might be uncomfortable with her answer.

Rachel eyes the dumplings collecting the cool air around them and, doesn’t even notice the fact that they have yet to start eating. Both of them are too overcome with anticipation to pay attention to much else aside from each other.

It felt instinctual to begin things this way.

“Yes.” She replies honestly, catching the way his face falls and regretting it instantly, “But that wasn’t your doing. I have come to understand that you and the rest of your battalion are merely victims of village gossip. Besides, the fear I felt quickly disappeared once I saw you.”

Jungkook’s face lightens once again as he extends his hand towards hers. Rachel feels a shiver rush eagerly up her spine as he slips his fingers between her own, “You aren’t afraid of me now?”

Anyone else may have found it odd that Jungkook needed this type of reassurance so early in the evening but, he simply couldn’t relax until he knew that he wasn’t perceived as a threat. He is so used to putting on a tough persona and, even more used to people fearing him. He has grown quite tired of always needing to disarm himself.

Tightening her grip on his hand, she allows a playful smirk to etch across her lips, “I wouldn’t have agreed to meet with you in the middle of the forest if I was afraid of you. That would be quite foolish don’t you think?”

Jungkook’s teeth are brilliant as he grins, a breathless bit of laughter leaving his mouth, “Not unless you were some sort of thrill seeker…”

Sensing the bit of suggestion in his voice, she takes her chance and utters, “Those aren’t exactly the type of thrills I’m seeking…”

Jungkook feels his mouth dry up at her words but, before he has time to process any of it, she raises the basket once more, “These are getting cold.”

And ever the gentleman, he doesn’t comment on it but just as he did with the image of her lips, he stores her comment away.

For later.

The two of them begin eating and, Rachel watches on fondly as he shoves more than half of the dumplings in his mouth. She can tell he is doing his best to appear civilized but, Y/N did mention that they don’t eat proper meals very often so, his manners weren’t exactly in tip-top shape.

Rachel didn’t mind. In fact, she took great pleasure in watching him stuff himself. His cheeks puffed up adorably to accommodate the volume of dough he was shoving in them but, despite him wanting to eat the entire batch, he kept insisting on feeding her bites of food every 30 seconds or so.

During dinner, they talked about all sorts of things:

Rachel’s childhood, her work as an educator, her favorite seasons…

Jungkook wanted to learn it all.

He was fascinated by her entire existence.

However, after a certain amount of time, Rachel begins to notice how he continuously shifts the conversation back towards her. He doesn’t look uncomfortable when she asks him questions but, he keeps answering them as quickly as possible.

Finally, Rachel decides this theme has gone on long enough before she finally asks the one question that’s been on her mind all night.

“What led to you joining Yoongi’s battalion so early?”

Jungkook swallows the instant lump in his throat, “Uh well…it wasn’t hyung’s battalion yet when I first joined. We both went in together. He took over when he was about…” He thinks for second, “20 I think? So I would have been about 17. But we were both running in missions long before that.”

Rachel almost comments on the fact that he didn’t answer her question but, he beats her to it and, continues.

“Yoongi-hyung and I are brothers but, not by blood.” He begins, “His family took me in when I was 7.”

She can sense that he is about to tell her something quite serious so, she hesitates to ask any further questions; he would clarify if he was comfortable enough to do so.

“Hyung and I are from the same village. Our families had been neighbors for three generations until-“ He averts his eyes, preparing to tell the story that started it all, “we were attacked. Our village was destroyed by a raider clan. The first incident wasn’t so bad but, they came back and-“ Jungkook swallows the emotions that have balled up in his throat, “they decided that they weren’t after our valuables any longer; they were after blood.”

Rachel’s whole body is tense with the weight of his story, her mouth seemingly frozen in its slightly parted position as she tightens her grip on his hand.

“I still can’t comprehend it.” He breathes, shaking his head, “It wasn’t even like they were trying to recruit us or take us as laborers; they just wanted to create chaos.”

She can see the way his eyes are growing glossy and the way his breath seems to shorten and with her whole being, she expects to wipe his tears but, they never come.

“Our families tried to flee the village together but-“ He clears his throat, “my parents and I were shot by the enemy’s arrows. I remember seeing them go down in front of me and, then there was this horrible pain in my side. I tried to stay with them but, Yoongi-hyung wouldn’t let me. He just threw me over his shoulder and ran. I still don’t know how he did it; he must have ran with me for hours before we made it to the next secure village.”

Still captivated by his story, Rachel runs his thumb over the backs of his knuckles to ensure that he knows she’s right there with him.

“I’m so sorry.” She whispers and, he offers a sad smile in return, squeezing her hand.

“Hyung told me many years later that the shots my parents received were fatal. There was no chance of rescue. But, for so long I believed I had abandoned them there. From then on, the only family I knew was Yoongi-hyung and, the parents he decided to share with me; He shared everything with me actually: his food, his clothes, his bed, his patience,” Jungkook chuckles breathlessly, “When the military council came for him, I panicked; we had been inseparable for so long. I couldn’t stand to see my hyung going off to war alone so,” At last the heavy emotions begin to lift from his face as a slight smirk comes over his lips, “I may have snuck out in the middle of the night and, followed him out…”

Rachel’s eyes widen, “You could have been killed!” She smacks his arm playfully which causes him to break out in a fit of laughter, “How on Earth did you manage that??? I’ve always heard they were so meticulous!”

Jungkook shrugs, somewhat smugly, “I fit in quite well. I was already taller than hyung at this age and, he and I had been training together since we were young.”

“What did he say when  realized you had come along??? I’m surprised he didn’t send you home himself.”

He is chuckling again, his eyes lighting up fondly at the memory, “Oh he nearly killed me himself actually…he found me hiding out in a barn on the military camp and, it was truly the only time I’ve ever seen him that afraid. But once he was done lecturing me, we both decided it was safer for me to stay. Hyung was worried that I’d be punished if he turned me in to his general so, I passed as a volunteer. The rest is history…”

Rachel grins, overcome with fondness, “History indeed, especially the part when you became the youngest recruit to ever join the royal army.”

The faintest blush crosses his cheeks, “Well technically, the records will never reflect that, most people in our land believe hyung and I are the same age. I personally find this hard to understand as he clearly has so many more wrinkles than I do but-“ He shrugs again, “I suppose it works out.”

She smirks, “I suppose it does. I don’t know where the royal army would be without it’s Terror Cub…”

Jungkook groans, his face turned up in disgust, “I will haunt the historian who writes that name down in the books. Could they not have come up with something more menacing? Terror Cub? It sounds like a character in a children’s book…”

He is pouting profusely now and, Rachel decides that his adorable expression is far deadlier than any weapon he could wield.

She was simply powerless against it.

“I promise not to go blathering to any of our historians about it. If anyone asks, I will tell them you were the fiercest solider in all of the land.”

Jungkook’s heart swells with pride as he subconsciously puffs out his chest, “While you’re there please tell them of our involvement as well. I hope to be remembered for the pursuits of my heart rather than just my skills on the battlefield…”

Rachel’s lips twitch, “What exactly shall I tell them?”

His demeanor shifts slightly and, it's as if the sparkle in his eyes turns to lightening, “I think you should tell them that-” The distance between their lips seems to lessen almost subconsciously as Jungkook licks over his bottom lip, “our connection was medicinal, that it was almost as if we had been holding our breath until we finally found one another.”

Despite Jungkook’s words raising every hair upon Rachel’s skin, he seems to grow immediately nervous by his candid statement.

“That’s really excessive isn’t it? My hyungs always tell me that I should think before I-“

But he isn’t able to finish his sentence…

Rachel has closed the distance between them and, is pressing her lips against his own. Jungkook’s body stalls at the feeling and, he assumes the whole world stalls along with him.

For in this moment, there is nothing else but her lips.

Jungkook’s hands are unstable as they reach her cheeks and, he grimaces because he knows his palms are damp with the evidence of his nerves.

But Rachel doesn’t notice.

She can only sigh hopelessly into his mouth as the two of them deepen their kiss.

============================

The river welcomes you with open arms this evening. The chill of the oncoming fall season is no match for the thick woolen coat your mother made for you last year. Tonight, you are overcome with peace as you stroll along the embankment. You’ve always felt so much happiness around the river but ever since meeting Yoongi, the meaning of this piece of land has shifted and intensified.

He is unlike anyone you’ve ever known. He’s wise and controlled but, he carries a type of wildness that is uniquely his own. The great and powerful Tiger: he is so much more than just a rumor.  Even though you claimed to make your own judgements about things, you still expected Yoongi to be some sort of brut; an egotistic warrior at best or a bloody thirsty monster at worst.

But you had been wrong.

Yoongi was a man of great skill yes, quick like lightening and deadly like his feline persona but, his heart contained so much depth and so much warmth, that you found yourself drowning in it. The two of you hadn’t known each other long but, the emotions are already so strong. Your future with him is all you find yourself daydreaming about and, you can only hope that he is able to keep all of the promises he made to you.  

The anxiety surrounding his departure strikes again, right in the middle of your heart.

You have half a mind to join his ranks or even stowaway amongst the new recruits…

Surely he wouldn’t notice if you wore a disguise, right?

The twigs snapping on the forest floor behind you remove you from your ridiculous plan as a smile immediately graces your face.

“You’re late.” You call, not bothering to turn around, “Did the recruits keep you tied up again?”

There is a bit of silence before a voice answers your question.

“I didn’t realize you were expecting me- although it doesn’t surprise me that Yoongi’s plaything would have a heightened sense of awareness…” The voice is unfamiliar and, it causes your blood to run cold, “…given that she’s canoodling with a monster.”

It all happens so quickly.

Just as you’re about to turn towards the voice, a burly arm is wrapping around your neck. Gasping for air, your hands immediately fly up to claw at your attacker’s forearm.

Panic is rushing through you, your feet kicking around as he attempts to drag you backwards into the trees.

“You really shouldn’t be out in the dark by yourself, pretty.” He snarls into your ear, his breath reeking of alcohol, “There are a lot of maniacs out here…”

You can feel yourself losing consciousness as he tightens his grip on your neck. Your fingernails are desperately digging into his skin, trying to cause him any discomfort that you can.

“I want to see the look on his face-“ Your assailant cackles, “I want to see his reaction to your cold body laying in the place where you first kissed…He thinks he’s strong but-“

You hear him gasp for breath as an unknown force seemingly knocks it out of him. When he releases his grip on your neck, you frantically suck in the air around you, wincing as you fall to your knees.

In your attempt to distance yourself you scramble up against the nearest tree and, just as you’re about to scream for help, you realize that you’re not alone.

A golden dagger sticks out of your attacker’s shoulder as he attempts to get away from the one who threw it: Yoongi.

“Stay right there.” He calls to you gently, his eyes devoid of any emotion.

You are still reeling from nearly being choked to death but, you listen to his command, nonetheless. The man on the floor is dressed in the colors of the royal army and, you gather that he belongs to Yoongi’s battalion- or at least he pretended to.

Yoongi catches him by the hair as he drags him up to his knees. The man is spluttering from the pain, his brows drawn in tightly as he struggles against Yoongi’s grip.

“Do you remember the lesson from this morning, rat?” He ventures, his voice casual and icy cold.

“Y-yes sir…”

Yoongi rips his hair back again so the tip of his nose is facing the sky, “What was it?”

“Ah!” He groans, his hands balling up at his sides, “N-necessities, sir.”

“Necessities- very good.” Yoongi would sound like he was praising him if it weren’t for the heartless smirk painted across his lips. “Now, would you say your head was a necessity?”

As Yoongi asks his question, he unsheathes his sword with his free hand and presses the blade to the man’s throat.

“Yes!” The man practically yelps, his body freezing beneath Yoongi’s grip, “Yes, sir! Very necessary, sir!”

You can’t help but watch in complete shock. There is a part of you that knows Yoongi would never kill someone in front of you but, the way the light has drained from his eyes is forcing you to doubt yourself.

“Oh is it now? What about your throat?”

Yoongi’s expression barely shifts but, you can literally feel the fury emanating off of his figure as he presses the blade further into his skin. Ruby red blood barely peeks out of the man’s skin as he whimpers.

“Yes-“ He chokes out, “It’s necessary! Please! They told me to kill her, I’m just the middleman! If you spare me, I promise I will tell you everything just-“

Yoongi stalls his movements, his eyes flashing towards you for a moment before yanking his head back again, “Who is they?”

Through another pained groan, the man spits out his answer, “The Meddleways sir.”

Although unfamiliar to you, the name seems to affect Yoongi greatly. However, he quickly composes himself and pulls the man upwards by his hair, “Stand up.”

Wincing, the man rushes to his feet, his hands lingering out in front of him with uncertainty.

With his lips curled beneath his fury, Yoongi offers one last eerily calm sentiment in the man's ear, “You are very lucky that I am in the presence of a lady. Had I come across you on my own-” He stops himself, taking a deep breath in through his nose. He shuts his eyes for a moment, collecting the storm inside of him before continuing, “I will put you with your leader after my men are done questioning you. From there, you will make the journey to your trial and, whilst you are on your way- please be sure to thank whatever god you believe in that I am not the one tasked with your punishment.”

Yoongi’s voice is nearly unrecognizable. It’s like a glacier, cold and enormous but, slow moving. It seems to inch into the man’s subconscious as he cowers beneath him.

“Do you understand?” Yoongi confirms to which the man nods immediately, “Good.”

With that final word, he rips the dagger out of the man's shoulder. His yelp is cut short by the handle of said dagger as Yoongi whacks it against the side of his head. The man falls to the ground unceremoniously, his body going limp for the time being.

The events that have transpired, leave you frozen against the bark of your favorite willow tree. Yoongi seems to know something you don’t and, you can’t fight your instinct to ask questions.

“Do you know him?”

Your voice seems to pull Yoongi away from his urges and back to reality. In an instant, he is rushing over to you, his cold gaze defrosting slightly as he assesses your wellbeing.

“Did he touch you?” He mutters, his fingers on the end of your chin, tilting your head to the side.

“Well, he was choking me but-”

Yoongi glowers, his nostrils flaring slightly, “Did he touch you?”

The way he emphasizes the word ‘touch’ gives you the hint that Yoongi is referring to whether or not he violated you.

“No...” You whisper, allowing your fingers to brush against his cheek, “He was only on me for a moment before you found us.”

Yoongi deflates under your touch but, to say that he relaxed would be an overstatement. In fact, it's safe to say that he has never been more tense in his entire life.

“Are you hurt?” His voice breaks at the end as he swallows back his emotions. Before you’re able to answer, Yoongi’s eyes light up with quiet rage all over again, “Your neck- it's going to bruise-”

“Hey-” You coax his gaze up to yours, “I’m safe. You saved me and, I’m safe.”

Your words unfortunately do nothing for him but, he doesn’t want to center this interaction around his fear. Instead, he simply nods and places a tense kiss to the center of your forehead before nodding to the limp figure behind him.

“I need to take him back to the compound, Namjoon and Jimin will get out any information he has. In the meantime, I need you to stay away from here. In fact, don’t go anywhere alone after sunset- not until I can assess the-”

“Let me come with you. I want to know what’s going on-”

Yoongi shakes his head, “No. It’s too dangerous to have you on the compound right now. My entire battalion may be compromised.”

“But Yoongi-”

His eyes grow cold again, “This is not a discussion. A civilian has no place in these matters.”

With his words, he drops his grip on you but just before he steps back, you are shooting a glare his direction.

“Civilian? Is that what you call me now, Min Yoongi?”

Using his full name would be considered disrespectful if the two of you didn’t know each other the way you do but, it still feels foreign coming out of your mouth.

Yoongi technically has authority over you and your entire village. If he wanted to, he could order you to do anything he wishes. Yoongi never exercises his power this way but, he is so overcome with fear that he wants to do anything to protect you. “You know that isn’t what I was implying. Don’t twist my words.”

“Then please feel free to untwist them for me. That term comes with a loaded meaning, and you know it...”

The tension clings in the air between you like moss to a tree. It’s uncomfortable and more importantly, unfamiliar. Yoongi stares you down, his hardened gaze wavering as the seconds pass. His eyes trace each feature of your face with desperation, seeking to memorize your current expression and, not because he is particularly fond of it but, merely because it belongs to you.

Yoongi’s future is not guaranteed and, therefore- neither is his life with you.

So he must memorize it all.

“I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way.” He concedes, his features softening, “I just need some time to sort through my men. I won’t deny your request for information but, I have to gather it first. I am asking you to stay away until then and, its only because I fear for your safety- not because I don’t regard you as my equal.”

His words gnaw at your guard until it disappears and, suddenly you wish to be in his arms. You know both of your reactions came from a place of fear as its woefully unlike the two of you to misunderstand one another.

“I’m scared.” You whisper, “I don’t want to leave your side.”

Yoongi’s heart breaks at the worry written on your beautiful face and, he loathes the unconscious man beside him even more for making you feel this way.

“Come here,” He reaches a hand out towards you and, as soon as you take it, he is pulling you against him. He places a kiss atop your head, allowing his lips to linger for a moment. When he feels your fingers curl into fists around the fabric of his tunic, his eyes squeeze shut.

He is terrified.

“I won’t let anything happen to you ever again, do you understand?” He murmurs, his voice unstable, “I will protect you with my life and, gladly lay it down for your own.”

All you do is nod, burying your face into the crook of his neck, “But you’re going to leave me...”

And for this Yoongi has no response.

Because he will protect you yes, but he will never lie to you.

He is going to leave you and, it will be much sooner than he had planned; there is no use in training the recruits now- as far as he is concerned, they have all gone bad.

“Only my body will leave you.” He answers with another kiss to your head, “The rest of me is bound to you forever.”

----------------------------------------------------

It’s been nearly a day since you’ve seen Yoongi.

After he tied your attacker to a tree, he walked you back home and, fetched the rest of the men for reinforcements.

You have yet to see the man since Yoongi disarmed him but, more importantly, you hadn’t seen any of the battalion.

It was as if they had disappeared overnight.

The only indication of their presence was their horses roaming around the compound. The rest of the men were seemingly confined to their tents, a tactic likely used by the leaders to ensure they kept track of everyone whilst they interrogated the wayward recruit.

But still, it was unnerving.

It gave you another glimpse at what your world would look like very soon. Your life had changed so drastically since Yoongi’s arrival and, you simply weren’t ready to move throughout your day without the promise of meeting him by the river.

But you had to be ready.

You had to be ready a lot sooner than you anticipated.

The day had moved like slugs along the riverbank after the summer heat has dried up parts of its shoreline. Despite the nerves brewing within you and the ache of anticipation all over your body, the clocktower stared back at you defiantly, refusing to move.

Yoongi promised you he would come to your house as soon as he had the information he needed but, you weren’t planning on waiting for him any longer.

It had been nearly twenty-four hours since you were attacked and, without answers, you slowly felt yourself going insane with impatience. Once your wares were packed up and taken home, you strode with determination to the makeshift compound.

Still appearing to be deserted, you don’t have any clues as to which tent to start with first. You opt for the one that the seven men usually stay in and as you approach it, you desperately wish you were here delivering bread.

The illusion of simplicity had been shattered. You were being courted by the leader of the Royal Army and because of this, nothing was never simple to begin with.

You felt foolish for believing otherwise.

Before you’re able to ring the bell outside of the tent, you are met with Yoongi rushing from the opening, still dressed in the same clothes he wore the night prior. Dark rings of exhaustion are positioned around the sockets of his eyes and, his lips look as though they haven’t had a sip of water all day.

He is beautiful but, he looks like hell.

“I had a feeling I wouldn’t need to come looking over you-” He smiles but, it doesn’t reach his eyes. Instead, he offers his arm and jerks his chin towards the trees, “Walk with me?”

This can’t be good.

You nod, interlocking your arm with his and, taking a moment to relish the warmth that still ebbs and flows from him. Even with the gnawing monster of the unknown staring daggers at you in the distance, you feel safe with him.

“Did he keep his promise?” You ask him as the two of you step into the forest. The light shining through the trees is painted the same color as the sunset on the mountains and, if this were a normal meeting between the two of you, you would have admired it. However, the only thing you can focus on is what Yoongi has yet to tell you.

“He did,” He nods.

The promise, of course, refers to the attacker vowing to tell Yoongi anything he wanted to know if he decided to spare his life.

“And?” You cock your head, trying to catch his gaze that seems to be fixated upon the dirt beneath your feet.

If only you knew that he was actually staring at the way your dress billows in the wind, the way the shadows from the leaves bounce off the soft skin of your ankles...

He must memorize it all.

“I have to leave...” He finally says, looking up at you, “...tonight.”

The news is reasonable but, it feels like a cruel joke. You have half a mind to deny him, to lash out and, scold him for toying with you in such a way.

But Yoongi would never lie to you.

Ever.

“Tonight.” You whisper, swallowing the bitter flavor of the word. And almost involuntarily, your hands are curling gently around his forearms in protest, “Why tonight?”

Yoongi can quite literally taste the pain in your voice and, it sickens him; it sickens him because, there is nothing he can do about it.

He leaves his arms in place for you to touch however you want, thoroughly shocked that the desire still manages to coil in his stomach even in the face of such sadness.

“The man who gave me this scar on my face was the leader of a cruel wayward group known as the Meddleways. Years ago, after Namjoon successfully lead them to our army, the leader and I fought to the death. Xansa, was his name. It was the closest I had ever come to losing my life.” Yoongi almost smiles as he feels your grip on him tighten but, he opts for gently caressing beneath your elbows instead, “This group, they had plans to attack the Queen’s capital and assassinate the people who lived there. After the death of their leader however, many of them came to our side- claiming that they were held against their will. There were a small number who escaped and, I foolishly assumed they would dissolve.”

You look up at the scar he speaks of, gazing at the angry strip of marred flesh running down the center of his right eye. In complete silence, you reach up and trace your index finger along the shape of it, letting out a shaky sigh at the thought of someone causing him pain.

“They haven’t.” You conclude whilst Yoongi closes his eyes beneath your touch, “Have they?”

He simply shakes his head as his hands secure themselves round your waist. His eyes stay shut even when you move your hand from his scar to cup his cheek. The skin there is splotchy from the evening breeze and, surprisingly soft. You almost think to question it but, Yoongi is already answering your silent observation.

“Your salve.” He chuckles as his beautiful eyes finally open, “It would be swept up by the people of the capital in no time; it’s a miracle in a tin.”

Allowing just a moment of reprieve, your mind drifts to the not-so-distant future, “Shall I make a career there then? I imagine if you’re retiring, I will be the one providing for us.”

A bit of ego flashes through Yoongi’s eyes, his fingers curling into the fabric of your dress, “My villa is nowhere near the capital. And as for providing for us, I am pleased to inform you that I have enough gold from my military service to last us several lifetimes.”

Good, you think, one lifetime together wouldn’t be enough anyhow.

“Am I to be a housewife then?” You arch your brow, throwing an unimpressed but playful glance his way.

Yoongi smirks, “You are to be whatever you wish. It’s just worth noting that I have the means to take care of us both. Although, I will admit that whilst my retirement will hardly be noticed as there is already someone taking my place, if you chose to retire now that- that would have some dire consequences.”

His compliment, however silly, makes you giggle as you roll your eyes, “Your logic is insanely flawed my dear general however, I will accept your flattery nonetheless.”

Your laughter soothes the rawness in Yoongi’s heart, even if it’s just for a moment. He follows suit, unable to help the small bout of laughter that leaves his lips. But before long, you two seem to settle back into the solemnity of the moment and, you’re asking:

“There after you...aren’t they?”

Yoongi is nodding, his brows drawn tightly together whilst he murmurs, “They are coming for me now. My battalion and I must reconvene and cut them off before they attack here. Xansa is dead but, according to the man who attacked you, there is a new leader, Xansa’s brother. Their objective remains the same: they wish to destroy the peace the Queen’s have built and, exploit the land and it’s people for power.”

To know that not only is Yoongi tasked with defending the lands from violence, but also that he is being targeted specifically, frightens you beyond belief.

“Why can’t you stay hidden? My family will hide you; you could blend in here until they are defeated, I know it isn’t ideal but-” You sound panicked now and, it breaks Yoongi’s heart that he must deny you any reprieve.

“Darling,” He cups your face, his own bottomless gaze searching yours, “There is only one place in the world where I can truly hide. And someday,” A calloused thumb brushes over the apple of your cheek, “I will take you there and, we will live out the rest of our lives. But as of now, anywhere I go- weak minded men will follow, desperate to prove their idea of strength. My head is a trophy to all men who are poisoned by their masculinity.”

“Your head is not a trophy,” You protest but your voice barely reaches above a whisper, weakened by your own despair. For the last time it seems, you brush your fingers against his skin- electrocuted by the sensation, “and you are so much more than the rumors that follow you. So much more...”

Yoongi has to summon all the strength within him to keep his emotions at bay, not wanting to break down in front of you. Instead, he silently brings your lips to his and, presses the softest kiss to your mouth.

He pours everything he wish he had time to say into it, his breathing picking up slightly as you return the passion with everything you have.

The two of you know you have to break it off, especially as you hear the compound finally come to life beside you; they were preparing to leave.

With foreheads pressed together, you are the first one who speaks with bated breath, “Promise you’ll come back to me...”

His hands are on either side of your face now as he centers your focus on his eyes. You had yet to see such silent determination within them since you met and for the moment, it convinces you that his word is golden.

“I will crawl back to you if I have to.”

When you part, you gather that most of Yoongi’s men have already left. It appears that only the main unit and, a group of thirty or so remain in the compound.

“Hyung!” Hoseok calls from the front of the tent, his normally bright expression full of contempt, “It’s time.”

You detest how well their readiness to leave coincides with the end of your conversation but, it almost feels easier this way. Being unable to anticipate the exact point of Yoongi’s departure has allowed you to be suspended in ignorant bliss.

The pain isn’t as drawn out.

Yoongi returns his statement with a tight nod before, turning his attention back to you for the last time.

With all the power in him, he musters up a type of promise one can only convey with their eyes and says, “I’ll meet you back at the river...” He swallows around all of the words he wishes to utter but, with a delicate brush to your cheek, he leaves you with only two, “...my love.”

And suddenly, the world between you is massive once again.

Suddenly, he is a thousand miles from you even though he only moves a few yards away.

You feel frozen in place almost, your cheek burning with the remains of his touch as you try to catch the breath his words stole from you.

Is this really it?

The last guaranteed moments of your incredible connection with a man you could only dream about- is this truly how they end?

You’re standing there longer than you realize because, the next thing you know, you hear the whinny of the last horses and, the sharp commands of Jin’s voice.

Spinning around, you aren’t thinking clearly as you sprint towards the group of men beginning to ride away into the forest.

“General Min!”

You are surprised at how well your voice carries over the noise and, out of the group pops Yoongi riding on the back of a black stallion.

With his gold sword attached to his hip and, his capable hands controlling the reigns, Yoongi brings the movements of his horse to a stop.

“Don’t be late.” You call to him, fresh tears spilling silently from your eyes. But despite the tears, you are smiling- offering some semblance of hope to the two of you.

He chuckles, bowing his head towards you, eyes outlined in red, “Yes ma’am.”

Then he is gone.

And with him goes all of your steam for the time being.

It’s as though the energy has been pulled away from you, leaving you sullen and exhausted regardless of how much rest you’re able to get.

The weeks without Yoongi begin with nightmares. The one you had just before he left seems to haunt your subconscious day in and day out. It’s as if your brain were torturing you with worst case scenarios, preparing you for a world without him.

Without Yoongi.

The night the battalion left, you rushed over to Rachels and, upon her opening her door, you simply collapsed into her arms.

With your head on her shoulder, the two of you cried together. You hated the fact that she understood the pain you were in but, you were happy to have someone relate to.

She understood.

To live such an ordinary life one day, only to fall for a mysterious stranger the next…

And then to have that stranger seem so familiar, to connect so deeply with someone you haven’t known for very long and, then having to say goodbye…

It was a very specific type of pain and, your best friend knew exactly what the sting felt like.

Nearly a month of this passes before you receive something that has your monotone soul seeing color once again: a letter from Yoongi.

A young man, who identifies himself as a royal messenger, shows up at your door with a tightly wrapped piece of parchment that contains enough hope to keep you going for the foreseeable future. This young messenger explains that he was commissioned by the “the Royal General” to deliver two letters to this village every month until his return.

Two letters meaning, one to you and of course, one to the beloved schoolteacher next door.

The thought of Rachel getting to hear from Jungkook makes your heart sing.

Trying to contain the tears in your eyes, you thank the messenger profusely before practically tripping over your own feet as you rush back to your bedroom. You waste no time in removing the protective fabric from the letter, your shaky hands nearly ripping the corner of the parchment.

Y/N,

I know we didn’t discuss writing to one another but, I couldn’t handle not contacting you in some way. Thankfully, I’m privileged enough to have access to the royal messengers and, they have promised me they would deliver my letters until I return. Are you staying healthy? I know how cold it must be getting where you live. Please reassure me that you’re staying warm so, I can stop obsessing over it.

Our men have been successful so far. We’ve encountered many obstacles but, we have the strategies to hold our own. Most of my days have been spent working on a pathway out of this mess but, we have been unable to find the new leaders of the Meddleways. The Queens are aware and have sent reinforcements but, we still have a long way to go.

Not to worry, I still plan on keeping my promises to you. It’s the only thing that keeps me alert most of the day as I haven’t been able to sleep as much as I’d like to. Our time at the river spoiled me, I didn’t realize how much energy I was getting from your lips. Sleep depravity meant nothing when I was with you.

Yours,

Yoongi.

By the time you finish the letter, a teardrop is regretfully staining the center of the page. Frantically, you wipe it from the parchment before it’s able to blur the ink placed there by your lover. The indents from his lettering are the only piece of him you have so, you press your fingers to the page in an effort to feel closer to him.

Over and over, you read the words he wrote, overcome with gratitude that he would go to such lengths to have this message delivered to you. By the time you’ve read it for the tenth time, your mother is calling you from the other room, signaling supper is ready.

You have no interest in eating at this moment but, you know that family dinners aren’t something you’ll be able to enjoy once Yoongi returns. So, you decide to file your thoughts away for later and join your parents in the main room.

The meal your mother prepared takes a lot of time and effort so, you insist on cleaning up after the three of you finish eating and, send your parents to bed early. They work so hard and, deserve all of the rest in the world.

After cleaning up the kitchen, you eagerly return to your room to draft your response to Yoongi.

General Min,

I am pleased to report that I have not one but, two woolen blankets at my disposal. You can put your obsessions regarding my warmth to rest for the time being. Other than missing you, my health has kept up just fine since you left. The village is preparing for a rainy season as we do every year but, I’m actually quite excited for the storms.

It’s good to know the Queens are supporting your mission as I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to track down such a volatile group. Nevertheless, my faith in your abilities is still strong. If anyone were able to apprehend them, it would be you. In regard to your sleep deprivation, I can only offer you my energy from afar. I visit the river every night since you’ve been gone and, I find myself leaning against our tree, wishing that it was you who was pressing me into it.

Continue to think of my lips, General. They will be all over you before you know it.

I cannot wait to hear from you again,

Y/N  

A smirk is on your lips as you seal your letter with melted wax, hoping that your wayward tongue motivates him to keep going. The promise of finally being able to consummate your passion for one another burns brightly within you and, you can only hope he will feel the same.  

The messenger had explained to you that he would return for your letter in the morning as he had other deliveries in the area. That night, you slept particularly well and, for once you were able to dream of something peaceful.

As promised, the man returns to your home the next morning to collect your letter and with a tip of his hat, he assures you that he will return the same time next month.

And he certainly does but, it seemingly comes at the cost of said month dragging on endlessly. However, when the messenger shows up at your home, you are quick to forget the last four weeks and, instead just focus on the small piece of Yoongi waiting for you. Before the boy continues on, a nagging question enters your mind and, you are stopping him before he reaches Rachel’s house.

“Excuse me, I hate to pry but, have you been in contact with the general at all?”

He offers a small smile as he shakes his head, “No, ma’am. The general leaves his letters at one of my many posts throughout this land. I met with him only once but, he specifically instructed me not to come looking for him if he didn’t leave anything for me to deliver; he said it was too dangerous.”

This frightens you as it comes ripened with the devastating possibility of Yoongi being incapacitated in some way. Of course it isn’t the man’s intention to worry you and rather than unloading all your anxieties onto him, you merely smile back and thank him for his time.

Before he knocks on Rachel’s door, you also learn his name and, silently scold yourself for not thinking to do so sooner.

He tells you his name is Hyunjin and, expresses his gratitude for your business before leaving you alone to read your letter.

Y/N,

I am trying to find the words to properly convey how many times I re-read your letter and, all of the ways I managed to use it, without sounding crude, but then I remembered that my Y/N doesn’t really care much for decency does she? So I shall be candid for once…

It’s very late when I’m writing my response and, I am overwhelmed with my desire for you. It’s quite sickening actually. I feel lightheaded when I think of us alone together.

Never in my entire life have I wanted someone so badly.

I wish I could see you somehow. Jungkook draws pictures of Rachel on every surface he can but, I don’t possess the artistic abilities he does. My attempts to draw you would be insulting. Although, I wouldn’t commission anyone to illustrate you either; They would mess it up somehow.

How has your month been? Are you still baking bread as often now that my greedy battalion is away?

Yours,

Yoongi

You are immediately transported back to your schoolyard days as you squeal into your bedsheets at his confessions. Yoongi truly had a way of saying everything you needed to hear in only a few words. More notably, he had a way of speaking so passionately; it took your breath away.

Feeling full of unbridled optimism, you pull out a fresh piece of parchment and your ink to begin drafting your response to him. 

General Min,

I can’t help but wish you had been a bit cruder. Next time, feel free to include all of the way you used my words; it would comfort me to know that I am tending to your needs from so far away.

It seems as though you and I share the same illness. I can’t help but, think of you in the same light every evening when I’m trying to sleep. I only wish I was able to dream of you the same way, I’m certain I would wake up feeling much more rested.

Are there any updates on your progress? It’s been three months and, yet I feel as though it’s been twice as long. Are you feeling alright? Are you able to find adequate shelter?

I’m sorry for the interrogation but, I can’t help myself when I begin worrying about you.

Tell Jungkook that Rachel draws him as well. Every time I visit her at home, she is shoving one of her pictures into dress pocket. She thinks I don’t notice but, I most certainly do.

What kind of best friend would I be if I didn’t know when she was in love?

In regards to the bread, I am baking slightly less than I was before but, I still find myself adding in extra ingredients for you all every now and then.

I’ve gone on long enough but, I still have so much more to say.

Just know, I miss you terribly.

Love,

Y/N

Hyunjin returns again the following morning and, graciously accepts your letter before heading on his way. When you hand him the parchment full of late night confessions, you truly think nothing of it.

Despite the longing you felt for Yoongi, you had grown used to looking forward to his letters. In a way, it was almost as if he were much closer than he actually was. The letters made you feel like he were writing to you from the capital while he was away on business rather than out in the middle of the battlefield.

But that didn’t change the reality.

Yoongi was out in the battlefield and, things were growing far more complicated than he was letting on.

“Hyung, we can’t keep evading their fire. They are going to catch up to us eventually.”

Yoongi has been trying to write his response to you for over an hour and, every time he sits down to do so- he is interrupted.

This time, the interruption comes from Hoseok who stumbles into the tent, sore from yesterday’s battle.

“Yes they will,” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose, “and when they do, we will lead them to the outskirts of the capital where the Queen’s have established reinforcements.”

“Aren’t you worried they will strike before then? We have already lost-“

Yoongi interrupts him now, trying his best to control the frustration and pain in his tone, “I am aware. I write down every single one of their names. That does not change my plan. We will not engage unless we absolutely have to. I don’t want to see another village go down beneath our fire.”  

Hoseok is dissatisfied with his answer but, he knows better than to question Yoongi when he is like this.

“What is our plan for tomorrow, hyung? Are we moving to a new area?” Jimin asks quietly, his tired eyes barely lingering open as he runs his fingers through Taehyung’s hair. His head is positioned in Jimin’s lap whilst his injured body tries to recuperate; everyone was losing their steam. “I don’t know if Taehyung should be travelling right now. He might have to ride on the back of my horse if we must move on…”

Yoongi’s chest tightens as he sees the state of his men.

The most prestigious army is now littered with bruises and open wounds. There isn’t a single muscle in their bodies that doesn’t feel strained or damaged in some way and, he doesn’t even remember the last time they had a proper meal.

Clutching his quill in his fist, he nods solemnly at Jimin’s comment, “You are probably right. I will walk the perimeter with the rest of our men tonight before bed and if all is clear, he can camp out an extra day whilst he heals.”

Jimin offers a small smile in return that only just reaches his eyes, “Thank you, hyung.”

He nods tightly, adjusting the grip on his quill before continuing to write; he has so much he wants to tell you. He wants to cry out to you in his letter but, he doesn’t want to worry you. Instead, he’d rather pretend like everything is alright, like the two of you are merely star-crossed lovers sneaking around after dark and, writing in code to communicate with one another without being caught.

He wants to pretend like he is anyone else but most of all, he wishes to pretend to be the man he promised you he would be.

But, he won’t lie to you.

He can’t.

Y/N,

This might be the last time you hear from me for a while. Things are growing extremely difficult for my men and I. We must now focus all of our efforts on making it to the outskirts of the capital safely so, that we have the reinforcements we need.

My entire body aches for you, Y/N. There is no comfort for me aside from your letters.

And as much as it pains me to say it, I am beginning to fear that I might not make it home to you. I have yet to express this to my men because, I don’t want to worry them. I just don’t know what our future holds anymore.

We have sustained so many losses.

I don’t want to worry you either but, I am only doing so because, I need you to know something. My need for you to understand this overcomes my need to make you comfortable.

I love

BANG.

With a flash of fire, the tent Yoongi resides in is quickly overwhelmed with chaos.

And as he hears the desperate calls of his men, he knows he has no choice but to abandon his words to you and, fight.

Or else he and his men are doomed.

---------------------------------------

There wasn’t a particular day Hyunjin arrived but, you did expect him to come some time during the middle of the month. However, the middle of the month comes and goes without a word from him and, while you find this to be quite odd, you chose to think nothing of it.

Yoongi was in the middle of a lengthy mission, it was a miracle you had been able to hear from him as much as you did.

However, when the second month passes without word from him- you begin to feel the tidal wave of panic swelling inside of you.

You feel idiotic for getting sucked into the romance of letter writing. It had convinced you, only for a moment, that there was nothing at stake.

But this couldn’t be further from the truth.

Everything was on the line.

How could you lessen your vigilance?

Yoongi could very well be in a grave danger somewhere and, you would never know.

Does he have arrangements for such a thing?

Did he consider this?

Of course he did, you think, as you begin to choke back your tears.

He has seen more carnage than you could ever imagine; he most certainly thought of informing you of his passing.

So maybe this is a sign to be hopeful.

Maybe this means that he is merely stuck somewhere or far too busy to send letters.

With an almost delusional sense of certainty, you furiously wipe your hand across your face and, try to gather yourself.

Today was a busier day at the market so, you desperately hoped things would move quickly.

For once, you are lucky enough to have your wish granted.

The next month however, isn’t so merciful.

Every day is the same. You wake up, try to muster up a smile, pack your wares and sell in the plaza. You bring Rachel her snacks and, the two of you eat in silence before it becomes too much and, you both end up crying.

She hasn’t heard from Jungkook either.

It’s been three months and, you have heard nothing about the whereabouts of the men you intended to be with for the rest of your lives. It’s as if the world is turned upside down and, you spend the majority of your time thinking the worst.

The next morning however, you are granted the briefest moment of respite when Hyunjin knocks at your door. You barely manage to pull on your coat when you yank open the door and, beam at his presence.

“Thank goodness, I was so worried-“ You are cheering for only a second until you catch a glimpse of his expression.

“Good morning ma’am. I’m sorry to have disturbed you but, I felt it was my duty to give you an update on the General…”

Your blood is cold and still within your veins and, the sickening feeling of grief begins crawling its way through your senses.

“We haven’t heard from his battalion for months now. The Queens have sent out a league of experts to find them but, we have yet to-“ He swallows back his nerves as he sees the look on your face, “-we have yet to be successful.”

The tears are unstoppable as they quickly flood the sockets of your eyes. Your hand feels clammy whilst it grips your door frame, your whole body growing numb with each word he utters.

“This doesn’t mean the worst, ma’am. The Tiger’s army is well known for disappearing like this, it’s part of their strategy. I just didn’t want you to be left wondering why I didn’t return. When I went to the postal location, nothing was waiting for me.”

With a shaky and unrecognizable voice, you ask, “Not from Jungkook either?”

He frowns, looking at you with pity, “Nothing, ma’am. There are normally hundreds of letters for me to deliver and, I didn’t find a single one.”

Regardless of his attempt to comfort you, you knew exactly what this meant: something was horribly wrong.

You couldn’t even manage to think of the word but, all of your terrifying nightmares containing Yoongi begin to flood your subconscious. It's all you can think about now.

“I promise to update you as soon as I hear from them, ma’am.” Hyunjin feels immensely uncomfortable delivering this news and, he is eager to return home as quickly as possible.

All you can manage is a nod before you robotically begin closing your door, “Thank you, Hyunjin.”

Thankfully, your parents are out for the day so, you’re able to shut the door quietly before sliding against it, allowing a broken sob to leave your lips.

You knew in your heart that the likelihood of Yoongi and his battalion being safe was next to nothing. The lack of his letters had been evidence enough but, you wanted to remain hopeful, you wanted to convince yourself that he was just busy.

But you were lying to yourself.

Cupping your hand around your mouth, you let out all of the emotion you couldn’t relinquish in front of Hyunjin. Your eyes burn as your tears stain your cheeks, your lips parted in a silent scream. With your body shaking, you cry for the life you were never able to have and, for the man you were never able to love.

That evening, your mother helps you into bed. She understands when you refuse supper even though she made your favorite. She lets you cry in her lap like you did when you were a little girl only this time, you weren’t crying over schoolyard bullies.

You don’t leave your bed for two weeks. The only time you have contact with anyone other than your parents is when Rachel finally decides to drop by to check on you. Of course, the feeling had been mutual and, just as you had before, the two of you spend most of your time crying together.

Once she decides to leave, you are once again left alone with your thoughts, all of which are of Yoongi. Today in particular, you are remembering his hands and, the first time you intertwined fingers.

“Why are you looking at my hands?” You had asked him

“Because I want to hold them.”

His voice echoes in your mind now as fresh tears find their way out of your eyes for the millionth time and, it’s this memory that prompts you to visit the river.

You hadn’t been back since Hyunjin came to deliver the news. The thought of going there alone sent a deep sadness through you but, part of you felt like it might be a good idea.

If you were to ever truly mourn him properly, you would have to grieve every piece of your time together.

Wrapping yourself up in your winter coat, you make the short journey towards a place you once called your favorite spot in the world. At first, it was because of the inner peace it had brought you but once Yoongi came into the picture, it took on a whole new meaning.

The rain had stopped hours ago so other than a bit of extra mud and a much colder breeze, the river looked just as it did during the summer.

Securing your coat tighter around yourself, you sniffle whilst looking out towards the river. The palette of the sunset is reflecting off the water and, bouncing against the ground beneath your feet. If it had been under any other circumstances, you would have felt content here. You would be collecting herbs, humming to yourself, speaking with the forest creatures- despite their lack of understanding you but...

Most importantly, you would be waiting for Yoongi.

The thought once again causes you to cry as your brain tries to conceptualize a world without him.

It seems so impossible.

...

“So- is this where the tree bark grows?”

Your eyes widen and you turn around so quickly you nearly fall over. As if out of a fairytale, General Min Yoongi stands just beneath the entrance to the river, dressed head to toe in his strongest armor. His hair is slightly messy and framing either side of his face and his mouth is portraying a brilliant smile.

He’s alive.

You’re crying harder now, frozen in place as you call to him, playing out the first time you two met here,

“You of all people should know not to ambush someone like that...”

If you aren’t mistaken, you see him sniffle as the smile on his face only grows, “I’m sorry, I’m late ma’am...”

His voice breaks at the end and the next thing you know, you are running. Opening his arms, he braces himself for you and, as you crash into him- he uses all of his strength to lift you off the ground. Spinning in a circle, he chuckles fondly when you start placing kisses anywhere you can reach: his cheeks, his lips, his nose, his forehead, his chin...

It doesn’t matter, as long as it’s him.

“You bastard!” You cry to him which only causes him to laugh harder, “I thought you were dead I- I thought you were...”

He stops spinning as his gloved hands come up to cup your face, his eyes wet with the slightest evidence of tears, “Shhh I know, I’m so sorry- I tried everything to reach you but, it wasn’t safe...”

You’re shaking your head, your hands coming up to rest over his, needing to feel every part of him, “It doesn’t matter- you're here now.” You say the phrase but then suddenly, you are overcome with a sickening feeling. What if you were just imagining this? What if you had simply dreamed of him? With a desperate glance, you press your hands into his harder, searching his eyes, “You are here aren’t you? Like- you're really here? You came back to me?”

Yoongi’s expression crumbles, his thumb brushing over your cheek, “I am, my love. I am here- this is the only place I know now.”

Sniffling again, you lean in towards his lips, your mind completely fuzzy with emotion, “Show me, show me you’re here.”

He takes the hint, closing the distance between you and, tucking his mouth into yours. It’s a much harder kiss than you’re expecting but, you relish in it nonetheless. Yoongi’s lips taste like medicine to you, all of your pain melting away beneath his touch. He sighs shakily as he presses your body into the cool steel of his armor, slightly wishing that he had been able to wash up before coming to see you.

It’s been a long journey.

“You’re here...” You whisper into the kiss, your hands tracing over his features, “You kept your promise...”

Yoongi is nodding, pecking at your lips over and over again, “I told you I would crawl didn’t I?” When you nod, he continues, “Well I crawled, darling. I crawled all the way back to you...”

You pull back slightly, unable to get enough of his face, your fingers coming up to brush the hair from his face. Elated, you laugh breathlessly, a smile burned onto your mouth.

“You will never have to crawl again, General Min. It is now my life-long mission to make sure you are in a warm bed with a full belly for the rest of your life.”

Yoongi beams at your sentiment, his eyes lighting up along with his grin whilst his hands slide down your body before settling on your hips, “I love you.”

There it is.

Those three little words that have been etched in your mind for longer than they should have been.

Gripping his face between your palms, you are bringing his mouth down towards you once again, “I love you too.”

After much more kissing, Yoongi mentions that he hasn’t eaten properly in quite a while and, that he has a few things to discuss with you before you can leave with him. You insist that he can use your family’s bathing area to wash up and, that you will pick up clothes for him in the plaza; the armor he’s wearing looks incredibly uncomfortable.

The two of you decide to visit the local tavern as it will be a good place for Yoongi to eat and, update you on what’s going on. He does specifically mention however, that he doesn’t want to speak of what he’s just been through. He only assures you that all six of his leaders survived and, that the Meddleways had been apprehended. He promises you that he will tell you stories from the mission later down the line but for now, he only wishes to speak about your future together.

However, there is one question that’s been nagging at you since he arrived that is slightly off-topic.

“Is Jungkook here?” You take your seat at the table across from him, slightly hating how far apart the two of you are.

Yoongi grins, a bit of fondness in his eyes, “He wouldn’t even wait for me to get out of the chariot before he was already sprinting like a mad man towards her home.”

You feel overjoyed at the thought of how your best friend’s day is going. The grief hit the two of the same way so, you hope she is feeling all of the happiness you felt when you realized the man you loved returned home.

“Are the four of us riding in the chariot together then? You might need to stay in town for a few days if that’s the case- I can throw all of my worldly possessions into a trunk but, Rachel would need more time to prepare.”

Yoongi reaches out for your hand then, smiling as you instinctively lace your fingers between his, “The chariot only has room for two, I’m afraid. My brother has decided to stay here for the time being. I think this final mission was especially hard on him, he’s expressed that he just wants to stay in one place for awhile.”

This resolution warms your heart. The idea of Rachel and, Jungkook making a quiet life for themselves in your home village, brings you so much joy. In many ways, it seems as though they had found a home in each other and, you couldn’t wait to see what their future held.

“I couldn’t imagine a more perfect scenario for the two of them. Although, I do know someday Rachel wishes to leave the village…I’m sure they will work out the details when the time is right.”

“My brother has already insisted that he will build her a house with his bare hands,” He chuckles, “so, at least she doesn’t have to worry about finding a carpenter.”

“What a gentleman.” You giggle before taking a sip of your drink.

Yoongi squeezes your hand gently, acknowledging your sentiment before eagerly moving back to what he wanted to discuss with you.

“My villa has been prepared for the two of us whenever we are ready. We have an entire battalion waiting to escort us there but, we will have to return to the capital after a few days.”

“Retirement ceremony?” You venture with a smile to which he chuckles and, shakes his head.

“I opted out of the theatrics actually. As much as I appreciate the sentiment, those ceremonies last far too long. I am just eager to start my life with you. However,” He sighs, wincing slightly, “my successor doesn’t seem to feel the same way. He wants his full induction ceremony which of course, I would have to attend...”

You cock your head, “Who is your successor?”

Yoongi smirks, “Seokjin-hyung.”

This doesn’t surprise you. Jin is the oldest member of the lead battalion and although Yoongi was technically their general, Jin never failed to assert himself as his right hand.

“I thought the seven of you were retiring this year. Did he re-enlist?”

Yoongi shakes his head, “No, he is taking on the position I turned down.”

You cock your head, brow furrowed with confusion, “Oh? What position is that?”

A rather arrogant look flashes in his eyes for just a moment until he seemingly reigns it in, attempting to keep his tone as casual as possible, “I was asked to serve on the royal council as an advisor to the Queens…”

Its impossible to hide the widening of your eyes causing Yoongi to chuckle at the expression on your face, “You must have made quite the impression, General Min. My father has always told me that positions on the royal council are passed down by blood…you really turned it down?”

Yoongi merely squeezes your hand, “I did. Do you think I was mistaken?”

You shake your head, “Oh, of course not. I mean- selfishly, it’s the outcome I would have hoped for but, I just want to ensure that you didn’t do this for me.”

A small grin comes over his lips whilst his thumb brushes over the backs of your knuckles, “Unfortunately, I can’t exactly guarantee that, ma’am. I don’t think any of my decisions are made without you in mind…” You open your mouth to protest and, Yoongi merely chuckles again, holding his finger up to signal that he isn’t finished, “However, even if I didn’t have you in mind- I still would have turned it down. As flattering as the offer was, I don’t wish to work in this field any longer. I’m grateful for my time and, honored that I was able to serve my land properly but-“ He stares into your eyes and, you can finally get a look at how exhausted he is, “I’m very tired. I’ve spent my entire youth with a sword on my hip and, I want to live simply now. If I’m being honest, I want to be detached from the rest of the world for a little while...”

You admire the man sitting across from you so much.

He’s only ever given to others, laying his life on the line over and over again, only to have his reputation constantly called into question. Staring at him now, you can’t even remember a time when he was nothing more than a rumor.

“I can’t even imagine the hardships you’ve endured. Your desire for peace is only natural after everything you’ve been through.” You place a kiss on the back of his hand, allowing your lips to linger there as he responds.

“What I desire is you.” He counters, his voice slightly raspier than before, “Peace will just allow me to indulge in you properly. I want no distractions... just as I told you before.”

Yoongi’s voice is laced with something that is wholly inappropriate for a public setting but, neither of you seem to care- instead you just stare at each other for a moment. You watch as his eyes travel over every inch of your face before slowly easing down your neck and, back up again.

The pain of missing him is one thing but, the lack of opportunity to bury into one another is physically painful.

You clear your throat and, send a smirk his way, letting him know that you understand what he’s getting at, “Did you offer the position to Seokjin? Or was he just next in line after you?”

Yoongi leaves his lust in the back of his head for now. He doesn’t want to rile himself up in the middle of the busy tavern.

“The Queens offered him the position when I turned it down. He was named my successor a few years ago when I fell ill so, he was already in a position to take over for me if necessary. Out of all of my men, he is the most capable but, also the most willing.” He chuckles, thinking fondly of his hyung, “He will do a far better job than I would anyhow. He is much more social and, outspoken. Plus, he will be living in the palace- I couldn’t imagine a better life for such a man.”

The warmth in Yoongi’s tone is palpable and, you can’t help but admire the way he talks about his men; its as though they are family to him.

“To Seokjin,” You smile, raising your glass.

Yoongi follows suit, clinking the rim of his goblet yours, his eyes brightening, “To Seokjin.”

As the two of you sip from your cups, Yoongi continues on with his explanation, “The journey to the villa will be brief. We will visit the palace for the ceremony in a few days and, then make our way back home again. From there, we are free to do whatever we wish.” The word home fills you with bliss. For the first time in months, it seems as though everything was falling into place. Now, the two of you could truly be together and, live out the rest of your days in peace.

“Free-“ You muse with a smile, “I quite like the sound of that.”

He smirks, “Of course you do. You have never failed to remind me that you don’t care much for the rules…”

Shrugging, you lean back in your chair and regard him for a moment before replying, “I don’t care for the rules that keep me away from you, General.”

His smirk never falters, “Consider them retired then, apothecary.”

The two of your resist the urge to maul one another in public and, decide to return to your home so that you can pack up your things and, Yoongi can bathe.

You try very hard not think of the fact that Yoongi’s naked body is on display in your back garden as you neatly fold your belongings away in your trunk. There are some things that you’re leaving behind so, that your parents can continue to sell your wares if they wanted to. Yoongi has arranged for them to receive part of his retirement so, they never have to worry about working again. It’s been discussed that the two of you will visit often and, you promised your parents you would write them every week.

Yoongi returns from his bath whilst you’re shoving the last of your clothing away. You can smell him immediately, the scent of your lavender soap wafting away from his skin as he walks toward you. He says nothing until his arms are wrapped around your waist, his chin coming to rest atop your shoulder, “I’ve never been in here before but, your room is very much like what I pictured.”

“Oh?” You lean against him, “I didn’t realize you would imagine what my room would look like.”

You feel him grin against your shoulder, “Well- I suppose I thought more about what we would do in your room…”

Biting your lip, you turn your head to the side to get a better look at him, “And what exactly would we do in here?”

You have half a mind to check to make sure Yoongi had closed the door to your bedroom but, when his hands start sliding up the front of your body, you no longer care.

“I would have love to take you in this bed…” A low chuckle comes from his throat as he starts kissing up the side of your neck, “Although, I wouldn’t be able to make you scream properly with your parents in the next room would I?”

His words send a jolt of electricity up your spine, your body growing weak beneath his touch. Through your nose, you emit a deep and unstable sigh before gripping his hands that are resting just under your breasts.

“You could have kept my mouth occupied somehow-“ You counter, feeling your attitude brewing beneath the surface of your patience.

At your comment, you feel Yoongi’s grip tighten on you as he moves his lips to your ear, “Excuse me?”

But all you do is smirk in return, regretfully pulling his hands from your body so you can continue packing.

“You’re excused.”

Yoongi is about to grab you again but, the knock on your door interrupts your flirting.

This seems to be a very irritating trend.

The two of you eventually part ways with your parents and, although you feel a bit of sadness, you’re overjoyed that they are able to live their life together in comfort. And because of Yoongi’s connections, you will be able to come visit them whenever you want.

The sexual tension between you and Yoongi has yet to fully fizzle out and, he reminds you of this as he grips your waist whilst the two of you walk towards Rachel’s home.

He has many things he’d like to say to you after that comment you made back in your bedroom but, the excited greetings from villagers prevent him from doing so. And all the while, you continue to grin, pleased that you’ve been able to pierce that carefully crafted demeanor of his.

You scamper away from him as you near Rachel’s front door, eager to see your friend after everything that has happened today. You’re anxious to see Jungkook too; Yoongi mentioned that this mission had been hard on him so, you’re hoping more so than anything that he isn’t injured too badly.

Yoongi lingers extremely close behind you as you knock on Rachel’s door, practically bouncing in your steps as you await for her to answer.

And boy does she…

Swinging open the front door, Rachel is still giggling at the man seemingly attached to her from behind. Her hair is absolutely destroyed and, her dress is buttoned up improperly as she addresses the two of you.

“Good evening, Y/N-“ She practically slurs, her eyes lit up with the type of insobriety that does not originate from alcohol. She bows her head towards Yoongi, “Good evening, General Min.”

Your lips are parted in delighted surprise as you survey the two bumbling humans before you. Jungkook is dressed only in his linen trousers, his black tendrils sticking in every direction atop his head and, from what you can see- his neck is littered with various reds and purples.

“Good evening to you- harlot…” You chide, trying to contain your laughter.

She shrieks, reaching out to smack your arm, just as she always does, joy painted all over her face, “Excuse you! I am a respectable woman of education.”

“Uh huh-“ You smirk, unconvinced before nodding towards the man behind her. He’s not even really paying attention to you, his eyes are just staring up at your friend like a lost puppy, his lips swollen from their previous activities, “Jungkook, it’s good to see you. Are you well?”

He merely smiles, only glances at you for a moment before his eyes rush back to Rachel, “Very well, thank you.”

Yoongi clears his throat, “Jungkook-ah,” He scolds, “Answer her properly…also, why are you answering the door if you aren’t decent.”

Jungkook seems to snap out of it, hiding behind Rachel in an effort to shield his body from your view, “My apologies. I’m feeling much better now, I’m glad to see you are looking healthy as well.” His tone shifts once again as he addresses Yoongi, his brown eyes lighting up with mischief, “I just wanted to see you off hyung and, uh- Rachel said this was decent in this village, I’m just adapting to the new lifestyle.”

Yoongi raises a brow, unconvinced but endeared nonetheless, “I am highly suspicious of that explanation…”

Jungkook giggles like a boy who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar, “You should be.” He winks at his hyung, giggling harder as Yoongi wrinkles his nose in disgust. He rests his chin back upon Rachel’s shoulder before speaking again, “Are you two heading to the villa then?”

You’re grinning now, admiring how relaxed Jungkook seems around her, “We are. I was hoping to hug my best friend goodbye before we made the journey…”

Jungkook gets the hint, his eyes widening a bit as he reluctantly moves his arms from her, “I will give you thirty seconds.”

This causes Rachel to laugh, waving him off playfully as she opens her arms to you, “Come here you…”

You throw your arms around her, smiling even as the tears sting the corners of your eyes, “I’m going to miss you… far more than I care to admit…”

She laughs again, patting your back gently, “Oh you know I’ll be around…” She assures you but, her voice is tightening with her own emotions, “…but please make the journey to me often…I fear how stale this village will become without you.”

You’re looking at Jungkook now as he grins softly, admiring the two of you and, send a look his way, “I’m sure this one will keep you properly entertained…”

Finally, the Jungkook you remember returns as he seems to shy away from your comment, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

Rachel is staring at Yoongi too and, she musters up the courage to throw a pointed finger in his direction; she is still slightly intimidated by him after all.

“You’ll take care of her, won’t you? She is precious cargo, General Min.”

Yoongi tips his head toward her as he chuckles, placing his hand over his heart, “You have my word, ma’am.”

Rachel smiles, sniffling a bit as the two of you release each other, “Good.” You pull away from her, trying not to give in to your urge to cry as you both sort of giggle, exchanging a series of knowing glances with one another.

“I love you, my dear friend.” You squeeze her hands and, she returns the gesture, her eyes glossy while she slowly begins to release your hands.

“I love you.”

Jungkook is back on her then, his brow furrowed with concern at her saddened state. He says nothing, not wanting to ruin the moment between you two and, chooses to press a soft kiss to her shoulder instead.

Yoongi moves closer to you as well, winding his arm around your waist and, squeezing your hip reassuringly.

“Write to me?” Rachel asks, trying to mask the cracks in her voice.

You nod, blinking back the remainder of your tears, “Every week.”

Leaving Rachel is one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to do but, it feels so much better knowing how happy she will be. Yoongi stays silent for the moment, gently escorting you down the street, waving at many of the civilians that bid the two of you farewell.

Roughly 10 minutes later, the two of you are huddled in the back of a massive wooden chariot, pulled along by four black horses and accompanied by a group of guards. The interior is lined with padded silk and, is easily the softest thing you’ve ever sat on in your life. After the two of you are settled inside, Yoongi mentions your departure with Rachel:

“You two have a special bond, I’m sorry that you won’t be living near her for the time being…” He feels guilty for the moment, wondering whether or not you were happy giving up so much for him, “You know, we can always come back. I could commission the architect to design us a home out here.”

You squeeze his hand, touched that he would suggest such a thing, “I appreciate your concern but, I promise you that I am beyond content with my decision.”

His lips curve slightly, feeling satisfied with your answer for the time being. He would be sure to check in with you often, the last thing he wants is for you to feel unfulfilled.

“I’m happy to hear that but, please don’t hesitate to let me know if you ever get tired of me.” He chuckles, squeezing your hand as the two of you approach the chariot.

“I promise you, you would know...” You assure him, nudging his leg with your foot. Yoongi grins and quick as ever, he grabs your ankle and, places it upon his lap. The sudden motion makes you jump, a bit of laughter coming from your lips. Silently but still grinning to himself, he gestures for your other foot with his hand until you get the hint to rest both of them in his lap. He looks down at them, something unreadable flashing through his eyes whilst his fingers brush over the tops of your ankles.

Its such a simple gesture and, yet it sends shivers across the surface of your skin. Yoongi continues to touch you, not saying a single word as he traces the faint shape of the veins beneath your flesh.  Resting your head against the silk lining of the chariot, you allow your eyes to close in order to enjoy his touch. As your lids fall shut, Yoongi grins softly, finally allowing himself to ogle at you the way he wants to.

And oh, can you feel his eyes on you. They burn into your skin despite the fact that you cannot see exactly where he is looking. Truthfully, it wouldn’t matter even if you did, his eyes were everywhere.

His fingers slowly venture up to slide along either of your shins but, he is careful not to reach your knees just yet. And it's here that you decide to set your curiosity free.

“When was the last time you had sex?”

You feel his motions stop for a split second as he processes your question, the silence of the chariot much louder than before.

“Not long before I first arrived at your village.”

The effort to hide your frown is in vain as Yoongi’s rickety laughter gives you the hint that he’s already spotted it.

“Does that upset you?”

You keep your eyes shut, trying to stifle your smile, “Immensely.”

And there is another beat of silence before the two of you are laughing together. Yoongi flattens his palms on your legs, rubbing them gently in an effort to soothe them.

“I suppose that’s reasonable.” He concedes, his tone thoroughly amused, “And you?”

Your teeth are on your bottom lip then, trying to stifle yet another smile, “Not long before you first arrived at my village.”

Yoongi is pinching the skin of your calf playfully as an affronted scoff leaves his lips, “I see what you mean now, that is a truly upsetting answer.”

At long last you open your eyes and, the two of you regard each other for only a moment before you’re laughing again. It feels quite juvenile to jest about something like this but to you, it’s merely a testament of your comfort around Yoongi.  

“I guess it sounds odd on my end though, doesn’t it? Since I’ve been so insistent on waiting with you...”

You shake your head, “I don’t think so. I never assumed you insisted on waiting because you were protecting a virtue of some kind. You are a 28-year-old man, it would be silly of me to think that you hadn’t taken a partner before.”

“Taking a partner sounds far too intimate...” He retorts, “...my reputation caused many people to throw themselves at me in attempt to satisfy some sort of fantasy. Occasionally, my physical needs made me privy to their advances. But, that’s all it ever amounted to.”

It does sadden you that people interacted with Yoongi in this way. If they had taken just a moment to get to know him, they would have discovered someone worth spending their time on. In your case, spending a life time with...

You’re adjusting your position so that you’re able to get closer to him. With your feet off of his lap, you move across the seat until you sitting right beside him. His arm immediately positions itself around your shoulders, hugging you against him whilst your fingers venture towards the free hand now resting in his lap. Silently, you run your fingers over his skin, not missing the way his breathing shifts as you do.

“I am exceptionally grateful that you allowed me to get to know you. I don’t think I could have been this happy with anyone else.”

Your voice is smaller than normal and, it makes Yoongi feel warm inside, his head cocking in such a way to signal that he wants you to look at him.

“The pleasure has been all mine, ma’am- I can assure you.”

He leans into to kiss you then, barely capturing your lips before he’s pulling away to rest his forehead against yours. In the small beat of silence, you choose to utter the words you’ll be saying every chance you get for the rest of your life,

“I love you.”

And with a brilliant smile and, a kiss to your nose, he is whispering, “I love you too.”

On the rest of the journey, Yoongi updates you on the status of the rest of his battalion:

Seokjin, as he mentioned earlier, is making arrangements to move into the royal palace as he will be taking the coveted position of the royal advisor to the Queens. Yoongi also explains that he will likely take a partner in the coming years and, that his family will be well-taken care of for generations to come.

Namjoon returned to his home village to reconnect with his beloved, Danielle. The two of them plan to move towards the ocean and, raise a family there. Yoongi explains that it will likely be awhile until he sees him again but, that you both can expect a wedding invitation in the next year or so.

As for Jimin and Taehyung- they will be following a similar path that you and Yoongi are. Their villa is positioned deep in the forest, even further from civilization than the one you’re headed to. The last thing Jimin said to Yoongi when they parted ways was that he plans on dropping by once every other month to catch up, emphasizing how much he would miss him.

Hoseok’s status was somewhat of a mystery and, Yoongi smirks with a sense of fascination as he explains where he might be. Years ago, Hoseok met a woman who matched his skill with a bow and arrow. She lived in a village not far from yours and, takes a rather firm position against any kind of authority. Hoseok took a liking to her attitude and, challenged her to a marksmen competition. She won. Naturally, Hoseok was both wounded and intrigued by this woman and, Yoongi suspects that they had been lovers for quite some time until his battalion eventually had to move on. Her name was Orion, just like the constellation and, Yoongi bets all the gold in his possession that Hoseok disappeared to look for her.

The ride to Yoongi’s villa comes to an end nearly half a day later and, you’re asleep on his lap when he gently shakes your shoulder.

“We’re here, darling.”

And here you most certainly were.

Beyond a massive wooden gate laid the most beautiful structure you had ever seen. The villa sits proudly in the middle of a massive stretch of emerald grass with an array of flowers blooming around the perimeter of the cherry oak that winds in intricate patterns up into strong pillars. The windows are tan and, made of a screen like material which is intended to keep pests out of the home. There is a pond just off to the side, which you are eager to explore later and, a balcony facing the right side of the forest. Yoongi had not exaggerated when he said that the villa was quite far from civilization for the backdrop of the scene before you were the mountains themselves, enormous and calm as they loom over the property.

Everything inside Yoongi’s villa was a brand of luxury you had never known: art, elaborate furniture, plumbing, and more space than you knew what to do with. Still however, it was uniquely Yoongi in that it was comforting.

It felt like home.

He explains some of the interior to you as he leads the way to his bedroom. He mentions that you can get comfortable and put your feet up while he checks the perimeter; something he says to expect every night.

Old habits die hard.

With a kiss, he opens the door for you and, promises he will return in shortly.

His bedroom, or our bedroom as he had called it, matched the rest of the villa. It was quaint but clearly displayed his immense wealth as he had an enormous bed in the center of the room covered in likely expensive linens. The windows were all shuttered for now, the only light coming from the lanterns hanging by the door and the entrance to the balcony.

Whilst Yoongi is checking the perimeter, you figure you only have a few minutes to prepare before he returns. Rushing over to your trunk, you settle beside it on your knees as you rifle through your belongings, looking for the one article you had been saving specifically for this evening. Tucked into the bottom, much neater than the rest of your items is a sapphire robe made from the finest silk your village offered. You had been working on it slowly every since Yoongi had left, preparing for the night when you two were finally alone.

You were buzzing with anticipation as you take off your clothes, neatly folding them and setting them aside. Then the cool silk is drawn over your body before you secure it with the tie just above your belly button.

With a deep breath drawn in through your nose, you pad over to the end of his bed and, take a seat upon the cream-colored linen. The rain begins marching prominently upon the outside of the villa bringing a cold breeze through the cracks in the shutters. The glow of the lanterns placed at the entrance of the chamber throw shadows onto the tile floor, entertaining you for only a moment until the creaking sound of the door grabs your attention.

Yoongi enters the room, not looking up as he relays the findings of his perimeter check, “Other than a few rabbits, the coast is clear and, I think after all my years of training I can handle-“ He is in the middle of this joke when he looks up at you, the rest of his sentence dying on his tongue. You see his Adam’s apple bob in his throat, his eyes darkening as they trail over your figure.

It seems like forever before he says something, his body simply frozen by the door, unable to do much else aside from staring at you.

“I don’t remember you packing that…” He breathes, his tongue wetting his lips.

“That’s because I hid it from you intentionally.” A nervous but sly smile comes across your lips, your hands sliding over the tops of your thighs, smoothing down the robe for the millionth time, “Do you like it?”

He’s shaking his head, his lips kissing his teeth, as he steps just a little bit closer to you, “That’s really not the proper word to use…”

“Well-“ You swallow, standing up from your position on the bed, eyes searching for his, “You are free to use whatever words you’d like…”

“I’ve suddenly forgotten most of the words I know, unfortunately.” He counters, his eyes darting from you to the floor multiple times before finally focusing on your face. And he’s shaking his head all over again, a sort of desperate look in his eyes, “Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?

The sincerity in his tone takes your breath away but, you do everything you can to hold his gaze, trying to beckon him toward you, “I want you to see all of me.” Your hands are moving towards the tie that’s concealing you from him but, when you’re about to undo it, his voice stops you.

“Wait-“ He pleads, hands lingering out in front of him, “May I?”

You try your best to swallow but, the sheer look of desire in his eyes is removing all moisture from your mouth. Nodding, you hold a hand out to him, your fingers wiggling to beckon him toward you.

He finally seems to thaw out his frozen posture, heeding the gesture of your hand and, closing the distance between you. Almost involuntarily, he leans down and places a soft kiss against your mouth. His lips are dry, almost sticking to yours as he pulls away.

He’s nervous.

You both are.

But at the same time, you feel so incredibly at ease. There is a sense of peace between you now and, even though you’re about to experience something incredibly intense, you are both finally free from the bonds of the outside world.

Now, it is only the two of you and, all the unresolved passion that needs tending to.

Yoongi leans his forehead against your own, his hands slowly moving towards the tie at the center of your robe. You can see that they are unstable, the breath that leaves his nose is proof of that but, he continues forth anyway until his fingers are beneath the bow.

“You’re sure?” He whispers, his breath hot on your lips, making you want to kiss him all over again.

Your hands come up then, cupping either side of his face as you pull away, eyes desperately searching his own, “Certain.”

With your confirmation, he pulls the tie forward, drawing the robe apart and revealing your bare body to him. You never allow your eyes to leave his face, wanting to capture every bit of his reaction.

When you come into view, his expression seems to collapse slightly, his lips immediately parting in awe. Doing the impossible, he tries to swallow again when you use your fingers to slide the robe the rest of the way off.

And without saying a single word, he drops to his knees right in front of you, his hands coming up to grip your hips. Looking up at you, he shakes his head in disbelief, entirely overwhelmed by your beauty.

“There isn’t a battle in the world that could have prepared me for you.”

His words knock the wind from your chest, your breath leaving your lips in an unstable burst when your hand comes out to touch his cheek. When you do, he smiles, with nothing but bliss present in his expression. He turns his face so that he can press his lips into your palm a few times before rubbing his mouth over the area. Your other hand comes into play then, brushing over the clips in his hair and then allowing your fingers to slide down the length of his ponytail.

Right before he speaks again, he drags his lips to your wrist and, nibbles at the skin there, his grin broadening when he hears the change in your breathing, “Will you take my hair down for me, darling?”

His request is nearing the likeness of a coo. It’s a tone you’ve never heard before but, you now know you’d do anything if he asked you with this voice.

You pull your hand from his face and, allow it to join your other one in gently removing the accessories in Yoongi's hair. They might add a level of luxury to his look but, you know for a fact you prefer him without them.

He is beautiful without any embellishments.

When you start on undoing the elaborate work in his hair, he rests his chin just beneath your belly button and, simply stares up at you. The intensity of his gaze actually makes your cheeks hot but, you do your best to continue taking down his hair, scratching at his scalp once you’re finished removing the clips.

His eyes close as you do, a low hum resonating in his throat at the sensation. Yoongi’s hands begin moving down the sides of your body whilst his lips pepper kisses all along your stomach. They’re wet and lacking urgency and, they send a wave of pleasure directly between your thighs.

“Your hair is so beautiful- you'll have to let me practice my skills on it one day...” You murmur with a smile, letting out a sigh as he takes a bite out of your hip.

“You may do whatever you wish with me...” Yoongi smirks, sponging his lips down towards the ache between your leg, “For however long you wish.”

“I wish to undress you-” You reply, coaxing his gaze up towards you, “and then maybe have a turn on my knees...”

At your comment, Yoongi takes another bite out of your hip, his eyes blazing with lust. And almost defiantly, he begins kissing towards the tuft of hair between your legs, his tongue licking and just barely tasting the skin above your core.

Your fingers are back in his hair when he buries his face in yours and, you hear him inhale deeply before exhaling with a groan.

“You smell so good…” He nearly whines, kissing over the mound of your pussy, “…wont you wait your turn? I want to taste you first.”

And it’s so unbelievably lewd isn’t it?

The two of you had only pecked each other’s lips and, your lover is still completely dress and yet, he is begging to bury his head between your legs.

“Before you’ve undressed?” You tease, trying to maintain some level of sanity but, the way he’s looking at you is making that an impossible feat.

He looks absolutely maddened.

His response comes in the form of his tongue, licking over the top of you whilst his hands grip the outside of your thighs to coax them apart.

“Do you want me to starve?” He accuses, a sense of darkness in his eyes. Before you’re able to answer, he licks up the length of your pussy, his fingers pressing into your flesh, “Hm?”

The lust that’s running through your body is peaking at dangerous levels from his touch but, the way he’s talking to you is sending you into frenzy.

You feel like you’re going to explode.

“No, of course n-“

He cuts you off then, his eyes nearly black with desire, “Then let me eat.”

Your head is on the pillows seconds later with Yoongi nudging your legs apart so that he can situate himself between them. The silk of his own robes tease across the surface of your sensitive skin with every movement of his body. He still seems to be taking in the rest of you with hungry eyes but, as soon as he uses his hands to part your legs, his gaze turns ravenous.

Bared before him, you can feel how wet you are when the cold air of the room hits the moisture between your lips. You’re positively drenched and, he hasn’t even touched you yet.

This fact doesn’t go unnoticed by Yoongi who is now smirking darkly betwixt your thighs. He says nothing as his index finger draws a line straight down the center of your pussy before curling towards himself as he follows it back up, collecting the evidence of your arousal.

Even in the dimly lit room, you can see the way you’ve drenched his finger but, he emphasizes the visual by rubbing his index against the tip of his thumb, only to pull them apart and display your arousal drawing a string between them.

Yoongi stares at you with slight quirk to his lips as he raises his fingers to his mouth. He makes a show of sucking each of his digits until his cheeks hollow out, his eyes closing at the taste of you.

Your cunt quivers at the sight of him, mouth parted in disbelief at how unbelievably good he looks.

When he pulls his lips from his fingers, he allows the smirk to form on his mouth once again before whispering, “Oh- I’m going to devour you.”

And then his head is buried between your thighs.

Yoongi’s tongue moves with contradiction, like lightening and mud all at once. He traces the tip of it around the circumference of your clit slowly but, sucks it into his mouth with fervor. In an effort to torture you with pleasure, he never does one movement for too long, knowing that this would draw you to your end far too quickly.

You can feel your breath leaving your lips at an unstable rate, your fingers searching for something to grasp onto. Yoongi has this covered of course, his hands reaching for yours before resting both of your intertwined digits on your hips.

His tongue continues to explore each fold of you. It’s as if he were collecting every ounce of moisture from your cunt before becoming determined to make you to make it all over again.

When Yoongi is satisfied with cleaning you up, he sets his sights on your clit, his tongue licking over the throbbing bundle of nerves three times before releasing his grip on of your hands and, placing one atop his head.

With an adoring glance, he slurs, “Use my mouth, darling. Show me how you like it…”

His gesture makes you let out a breath you had been unconsciously holding, your grip tightening in his hair at his request.

The sensation sends a shiver down his spine that he most certainly plans on addressing later. For now however, he is preoccupied with learning how you like to cum.

You tug his hair gently so his mouth his back over your clit and, slowly you move his head up and down. Ever the fast learner, he quickly picks up on the pattern you want and begins licking his tongue over the throbbing muscle.

The relief that comes with consistent pleasure finally pulls a moan from your lips, to which Yoongi immediately mirrors between your legs. You find yourself parting your legs further, your hips angling up to get closer to his mouth which only causes him to increase the pressure of his tongue.

The pleasure is mounting inside of your stomach like a hurricane and, for some buried reason, you bite your lip to attempt from crying out. Yoongi stops what he is doing and pulls his lips from you, which are completely soaked with your arousal.

His brows are drawn together in disappointment, his hair tickling your thighs as he shakes his head, “Oh please…let it out my love, no one can hear you but me.”

He pulls his tongue up the length of your clit slowly, his gaze nearly predatory as he reinforces his request, “Won’t you sing for me, darling?”

You nod, licking over your lips as you guide his mouth back to your cunt. He seems to work twice as hard now, flattening his tongue as he continues to rub it against your clit.

The muscles within your core are fluttering inside of you, your orgasm not far from reality. At Yoongi’s pleading you allow yourself to be more vocal, whimpering his name when he sucks at your clit.

He groans again at the sound of it, his fingers digging into your hips for the moment and then, suddenly pulling back. Eyes locking with yours, his wet lips get to work on lubricating his digits before positioning them at your entrance.

Yoongi licks his lips and, with a salacious look he says, “Deep breath…”

And try as you might, the feeling of his fingers curling up inside of you, yank the breath you attempt to take right from your throat.

“Ah-“ You preen, leaning up on your elbows to watch him fuck you with his fingers, “Oh Yoongi…yoongi…”

He grins up at you, securing his fingertips against the spongy tissue you inside of you whilst his other hand comes down to rub at your clit, “I shall ban anyone else from uttering my name, only you know how to say it correctly.”

With the increase in speed and pressure, you can feel something mounting inside of you that you’ve never felt before. You don’t quite know what it is, you just know that you’re going to make a mess.

Slightly panicky, your shaky hand reaches out for him, “These are clean linens…I feel like I’m going to soil them.”

The breathy and desperate nature of your tone goes straight to Yoongi’s throbbing erection but, instead of burying myself in you as he wants to, he merely increases the pace of his fingers.

“They will be much cleaner if you do, my love.” He assures you, his voice nearly cooing, “Just remember to say my name.”

His right hand is massaging against your clit at the perfect pace as his fingers curl up harder inside of you. The squelching sounds from your body would normally embarrass you under different circumstances but now, the pleasure is too overwhelming for you to care.

“Oh- oh Yoongi…yoongi…” You whine, your back arching off the bed as the dams inside of you break, your orgasm gushing out of your cunt in a way it never has. And although you can’t see him because your eyes are screwed shut, you feel Yoongi’s breath grow closer to your core until his mouth is back on your clit.

“Yoongi!” You whimper, toes curling into the sheets as he draws the pleasure from you.

He groans against you once again, his tongue repeating the same pattern you showed him earlier until you are shivering mess beneath him. Once he can sense you growing sensitive, he gets to work at slurping up every ounce of your release. His lips are sucking at your folds, your entrance, the inside of your thighs, nibbling and licking up every single thing you gave him.

With spotty vision, you anxiously reach down for him, suddenly despising the distance between you. He takes notice instantly, crawling up the length of your body and, placing kisses on every bit of you that he can.

Yoongi’s hair forms a platinum curtain around your head, which closes quickly when you grip the back of his neck to pull him down towards you. You meet each other’s lips with a type of hunger you now fear that you could never satisfy, tongues intertwining with desperation.

Ever so tenderly however, Yoongi his cupping your cheek and whispering sentiments to ease your overstimulated body.

“Shhh it’s ok, its ok my love.”

“You did so well.”

“You fed me so well.”

“I love you- I love you so much…”

With each phrase, he seals it with a kiss, the rest of his body settling between your legs and its then you are reminded that he is still clothed and, desperately hard.

“I love you too.” You whisper shakily against his lips, “I want to see you, I want to please you now…”

You’re practically begging, filled with disdain that his body is hidden from you, especially after you’ve just cum all over his face.

And he’s grinning against your lips, a rather sly look twinkling in his eyes, “And how do you plan on pleasing me?” He hums, kissing up the length of your nose.

“Well…” You begin, allowing a hand to travel down the black silk adorning his body before finding the solid length of his cock, leaning away from his hips. Smirking softly, you place your palm against him, relishing in the way he twitches up towards it, “You said you’d give me your soul didn’t you? I want it down my throat first.”

Your comment causes him to groan, hips pushing forward against your hand as he furrows his brow. Almost frantically, he stares down at you and shakes his head, “I know you think of me as a strong man but, I don’t think I could contain myself if you put your mouth on me- not with the taste of you still on my lips.”

Using your hand, you encase his length in the silk of his pants, squeezing gently as you move it up towards the tip of him. And you have his head hanging on his shoulders now, arms trembling beside your head whilst he tries to hold himself together.

“I don’t remember asking you to contain yourself. Those have always been barriers you designed.”

Yoongi looks up at you, eyes drawn in with a mix of pleasure and apprehension. When you squeeze him again, he shivers, a wanton groan leaving his lips. When he opens his eyes again, they look more nervous than when he stood before you at the end of the bed. In fact, it’s a look that you’ve never really seen before.

It compels your hand away from him slowly as your other one comes to cup his face, “What’s wrong?”

He breathes out a laugh, his mouth turned up at the corner, “Why is it that you can always find your way into my head and yet, I can never find my way into yours?”

You ignore his attempt to lighten the mood, your thumb brushing over the apple of his cheek, “Yoongi- what is it?”

The tone of your voice is gentle but, the look in your eyes compels Yoongi to bear his truth, no more how vulnerable he feels.

“My body is-” He sighs and restarts his sentence, leaning his face into your hand, “The last battle, it left me with many injuries. Most of them have healed but, I don’t want them to startled you.”

You sit up then, causing him to take a seat on the backs of his legs. Unable to help your saddened expression, you simply shake your head, “Yoongi, the only thing your body can be is beautiful. You have laid your life on the line for the people of this land, myself included. I could only ever love everything about the body that brought you home to me.”

With glassy eyes Yoongi is reaching out for you, placing a searing kiss upon your lips and, through it he murmurs “I have never let anyone undress me before…”

You kiss him once more and pull away a bit to lock eyes with him, “Do you trust me?”

And looking like a much younger man, his wide-eyed gaze full of innocence he nods, his hand coming up to brush against your cheek, “You’re the only one.”

His response accounts for several sentiments. His trust, his love, his dedication…

All meant for you.

“May I undress you then?”

His answer comes in the form of another kiss, lips attaching to yours with passion as his hands reach out for your fingers. He leads them to front of his robe, which covers the length of his tunic and his pants and urges you to remove it from him. Taking his lead, you push the material from his shoulders and, allow it to drop behind him before finding your way to the hem of his tunic.

The two of you find each other's eyes once again whilst you slowly draw the material up his torso. He follows your motions, lifting his arms above his head and placing them back by his sides when his tunic is removed.

The first thing you notice is his hair, flowing in prominent waves down his chest and, stopping just above his belly button. Then come his arms, strong and lanky all at once, much of their surface littered with the evidence of his missions. You can see what he meant and, you try to control your expression when you gaze upon the bruises and, cuts that have yet to heal.

You want to scold him for not acknowledging his injuries earlier so, that you could tend to them. But, you can clearly see that they have been taken care of by someone with much more skill.

His eyes are on you, searching for any sign of disapproval, his heart beating wildly in his chest.

He wish you could hear what you are thinking.

But just then, a soft smile comes over your lips as you carefully take his chin betwixt your fingers, “Just as I thought- you are molded from the gods, Min Yoongi. There has never been a man who contained more beauty.”

Your words hit his heart like a dagger, some of the air nearly forced out of his lungs. And he’s wanting to kiss you again, his lips desperately chasing yours before your hand comes to rest on his chest.

“Easy tiger…” You giggle, causing his lips to twitch into a smile, “I haven’t finished yet…”

He eases up, moving back into place with both of you still on your knees, facing one another. With tender hands, you move the tendrils of hair from his chest so that they flow freely down his back. His chest is fully exposed to you now, the swollen muscles beneath his pecks also displaying traces of the life he has lived.

Of the life he is finally able to leave behind.

Now, with just your fingertips, you trail your them across his clavicle, stopping for a moment at the ball of his shoulders before trailing them all the way to his wrists. A prominent shiver rattles through him, his hands twitching by his sides with the need to reach out and touch you.

But he doesn’t.

He stays perfectly still with only his eyes falling shut as you explore the surface of his skin. You take your time, dipping your fingers into the lines of his muscles, tracing the maze of veins beneath his skin, and smoothing your palms across the tops of his shoulders.

He’s properly turning to mush when you whisper, “Lay down…”

Like a man bewitched, he feels the urge to obey every command that comes from your lips and, commit every statement you make to memory.

He pushes his hair back, allowing it to settle on the pillows in various directions. And beneath you now, with his arms outstretched above his head, he looks like a king.

A sort of curve settles on his mouth when you position yourself between his thighs and, although he may look strong and confident beneath you, you can’t hear the way his heart is hammering in his chest.

Sex is familiar to Yoongi.

Intimacy however, is not.

Smoothing your palms down the muscles in his stomach, you use your fingers to hook under the band of his pants.

“You might need to help me with this part.” You smile and it only broadens as he chuckles, lifting his butt in the air and maneuvering his body so that he can help you pull the material down his legs.

Settling back into his position, Yoongi takes a deep breath whilst you take in the sight of him. He’s so hard. The skin of his dick, reddening towards the tip, the veins winding patterns up his shaft, the whole length of him begging to be touched.

“My, my- so the rumors are true…” You muse, slowly tickling your fingers up his inner thighs, which send his dick twitching in response.

His brow is furrowed however, wondering what you’re getting at and, you answer him before he ends up asking you.

“You do keep a viper on you at all times.”

And for the first time this evening, he is laughing. The full bellied and rickety sound leaves his lips as he wipes a hand over his face.

“You are incorrigible.”

His tone is disapproving but, his eyes are still filled to the brim with adoration. Because of course you would make this so easy for him.

Of course you would make love so easy.

All of his fears seem to mean nothing when he is with you, even when he is at his most vulnerable like he is now.

“And you, my dear Yoongi-“ Your tone lowers a bit as your brush your fingers over his balls, smirking when you see his chest puff out, “-are beautiful.”

With that, you lean down and lick slowly up the length of his cock, collecting the bit of precum that has collected on the tip. He tastes like the salt of the earth and, with that small bit of him- you now find yourself craving so much more.

His lips part, a sharp breath leaving the confines of his throat, his fingers quickly rushing to the sheets in anticipation. It’s been nearly half a year since he received any sort of pleasure from another person but, seeing as it’s now coming from the woman he loves, he is overwhelmed.

You are licking up the length of him again, your ass sticking up there for him to gaze upon as you slowly encircle his throbbing dick in your palm.

He is melting.

With his chest rising and falling unsteadily, Yoongi’s stare blazes right through you, when you suck him into your mouth.

“Oh fuck-“ He swears under his breath, the sound of that word coming from his lips sending an ache back to your core. You start him out slow, your cheeks hollowing out with the force of the suction you’re providing him.

His fingers toy helplessly with the linen beside him, the pleasure from your mouth numbing the tips of his toes.

With your free hand, you cup his balls, sighing through your nose at the almost desperate groan that leaves his mouth. He looks beautiful, his lips parted, stomach caved in at the pleasure he’s experiencing, his hands fisting in the sheets beside him.

“’sso good…” His brow is furrowed now, hips jolting a bit when you take him deeper towards your throat, “Be c- careful love, I don’t want to hurt you…”

But you don’t listen and, instead you continue your motions, your two fingers pressing behind his balls as you attempt to swallow his length.

“A-ah…” He throws his hand over his mouth, still slightly apprehensive at the sounds he wishes to make. You watch him as he breaths through the gaps in his fingers, eyes squeezing shut whilst you take him further down your throat.

He moans into his hand, his toes curling into the linen. And to address his attempt to conceal his sounds of pleasure, you simply walk your fingers across his trembling stomach and tap lightly.

Instinctually, he looks down at you- nearly cumming when you suck off of his length, your lips swollen and covered in saliva which you then spit back down on his dick.

Rubbing your lips against the sensitive underside of him, you coo, “We’re the only ones out here, my love. Let it out…”

He leans down, rubbing his thumb over your lips for the moment as he nods rapidly before allowing his head to hit the pillow again.

Chest heaving, he tries to prepare himself for your mouth all over again but, fails miserably. The pleasure is just so intense.

You waste no time in easing him back into your mouth, paying careful attention to relax your throat. He is confident, even in all of his years of sexual exploration, that he has never felt like this before.

He feels like he barely has a grip on his sanity and, when you take him down your throat- he has no choice but to whimper.

The sound only encourages you, your eyes unable to leave him as you watch his nipples harden, his stomach cave again, his eyes roll back…

“Fucking- fuck…fuck fuck…” He mutters through gritted teeth before his mouth parts again, “Please- don’t stop.”

Fucking him into your throat is no easy feat but, the sheer state of ecstasy he seems to be in, allows you to continue.

You rub at his hips, attempting to sooth him, your motions on his dick now becoming hands-free as his hips start pumping at their own pace. Despite the burn in your throat, you don’t ease up, wanting to see him overcome with the sensations, wanting to please him completely…

He shakes his head, eyes blown out and searching for an explanation as to why it feels so good but, he comes up empty.

Its just you.

Yoongi slams his head against the pillows, exposing his Adams apple when he swallows back the scream that wants to leave his chest. But when he feels his balls tighten and throb with his impending orgasm, he caresses your cheek.

“Please, my love- wait a moment…please…” He’s only pleading because it’s the only thing that can properly leave his mouth right now, for your motions on him have left him bewildered.

You’re careful to suck off of him cleanly, kissing the tip of his dick as you bat your eyes at him, “Are you alright?”

He’s smirking now, and a breathless laugh comes from his lips, “I think you’re well aware of how I’m doing.”

You giggle at his comment, kissing his dick again before resting your cheek upon his hip, “Then what is it?”

And with that same rather innocent, slightly humble look in his eye, he confesses, “I’ve always pictured being inside of you…the first time.”

In his earnest and rather proper way of explaining himself, you are simply taken over by your love for him.

He looks at you as if he is asking for the world but, little did he know- you would think nothing of giving him such a thing.

You’re kissing his hip now and starting a trail up his naked body. His hands come to life beside you and take their time caressing over your skin.

One last trail is place up the valley of his chest before your lips are hovering over his.

“Then be inside me.” You whisper into his mouth, sucking the bottom half of it into yours.

A deep growl resonates within his chest and, the next thing you know he is flipping you over, arms placed on either side of your head as he reconnects your lips.

Wildly, he kisses at you, allowing your tongues to intertwine in a somewhat disorganized fashion, neither of you concerned with rhythm at this point.

Yoongi is pulling away to take a look at you, silently reassuring himself that this beautiful creature below him, desires him too.

It’s slightly hard to wrap his brain around.

But as you raise your middle finger to the scar marring his right eye, you are breaking down the last of his concerns. He closes his lids beneath your touch, his chest tightening as you whisper,

“No more wounds, my love. I will make sure you feel only pleasure for the rest of your life.”

With a last and exasperated sigh, Yoongi guides himself inside of you in one quick motion.

“Oh-“ He breathes, his eyes widening as he chokes back a moan.

Your own moan is forced from your chest, Yoongi’s rhythm not giving you a chance to last very long.

He presses his forehead against yours, his mouth hanging open even as you kiss at it, hips quickening with each thrust inside of you.

“I love you.” You moan, whilst your hands come up to secure themselves behind his neck.

He is hurling towards his release so quickly, he fears the intensity of it, but the only thing he can tangibly focus on is confessing his love to you over and over.

“I will l-love you forever, it is a-all I will ever do for the rest of m-my life…”

Even as he stumbles over his words, his eyes never leave yours, pouring all of the emotion he feels into his movements.

He pours and he pours…

And you drink and you drink…

Until there is nothing left to do but surrender to one another.

The first rope of his release leaves his body with a jolt, his hips jerking forward and, immediately his eyes screw shut, his face burying into your neck.

You rub his back, kissing all along the side of his face as another hot spurt of cum leaves his cock.

“Oh Y/N…” He whines finally, sounding in pain and relieved all at once, “Y/N…Y/N…Y/N…”

He calls your name over and over and, somewhere along the edges of bliss, you tip over the edge too, digging your nails into his back as you do.

You seem to take turns saying the name of one another, the two of you riding out your highs for as long as possible until finally, your lover collapses on top of you.

In the stillness of the night, the only sound either of you allow is the rainfall atop the roof and, the whispering sound of your breathing.

For awhile, you just trace shapes into the skin of Yoongi’s back as his lips sponge into your neck and across your shoulder, or any part of you that he can reach. Moments later, his concern for his bodyweight upon you takes precedence and, he finally rolls over, the two of you wincing at the loss of contact.

You quickly take your place atop his chest as he leans over to the bedside table and, grabs the goblet of water waiting there. There was one on either side when you came in and, you assumed the staff had put them there.

Yoongi takes a deep breath and, attempts to steady his hand as he brings the goblet towards you but, to no avail.

His hand continues to shake.

Placing your hand around his, you try to assist him as a soft bout of laughter leaves your lips, “You’re trembling.”

And with waves of messy hair framing his beautiful face, he simply grins and corrects you, “I am in love.”

He raises the glass to your lips and, admires you when you take several big gulps, feeling good that he is able to take care of you.

His reply sends butterflies into your stomach, which seems like a rather impossible feat considering the fact that they had taken up a permanent residence there months ago.

When the Tiger moved into your life…

You usher the glass towards his lips with a soft smile, feeling so much happiness at the peace present in his eyes.

“As I’m I.” You whisper, rubbing your hand over his hip as he drinks the rest of the water in the goblet. There is also a sense of exhaustion in his gaze however and, you are met with the reminder that he probably hasn’t slept properly in months.

Your telepathy pays off once more as Yoongi addresses the heaviness upon his lids.

“I always pictured this to end with one of our elaborate existential conversations…” He chuckles softly, laying back on the pillow. Before he continues, he is reaching up to brush his thumb over your lips, “…but I do believe you’ve drained me of energy for now, my girl.”

A kiss is placed against his thumb, “Sleep now. We have plenty of time to question our existence.”

Yoongi chuckles again, using the hand that’s on your face to pull you closer to him. He kisses you one last time, ensuring that it reaches your soul before he’s puling you beneath the covers with him.

The last thing you remember before drifting off is another exchange of those three words.

The three words you would never grow tired of saying.

Yoongi sleeps well past sunrise. His chest rises steadily beneath your head for the better part of the morning and, although you want to wait it out, your desire to see the view from the balcony finally overtakes you.

You’re careful not to wake the sleeping man beneath you as you slip out of his grip. And as you’re pulling on the silk robe he had left discarded the night before, you take the time to admire him. Cheeks puffed out, lips pouted, brow smoothed over, none of his features containing a single ounce of worry…

You planned on keeping him this content for as long as you both shall live.

The mid-morning air was cold but, it felt nice upon your skin. Sleeping with Yoongi was new and, you now know that he emits as much body heat as a fully grown bear.

Or a Tiger…depending on who you ask…

This of course is wonderful, especially given how harsh winter can get but, you were growing quite warm beneath his arm.

The balcony was simple. It was painted the same color as the rest of the villa: a deep cherry red and, other than a few plants in the right corner, there was nothing else aside from the view.

Overlooking the grounds of the villa, the balcony displayed all of the elaborate architecture as well as the natural aspects of the grounds themselves. You set your eyes on the mountains to the left of you and, are overcome with excitement at the thought of them being covered in snow.

A hawk flies high above your head, his call echoing off every surface around of the villa, connecting the two of you for that single moment. As your eyes move to admire the thick expanse of trees before you, a pair of strong silk-covered arms wrap around your waist.

And normally, you would jump in surprise but, this time you don’t.

You could sense him staring at you for quite a while now but, rather than disturb him, you just let him have his moment.

Most of your moments would be spent staring at him if you had it your way.

“I had feared for a moment that I had only dreamt of you again…”

The tone of his morning voice is much deeper and covered in gravel, the sound sending a shiver through you. You lean back against him, lips curving up in a smile.

“We are finally alone, General Min.” You assure him softly, rubbing over his forearms. He kisses up your neck, causing your eyes to shut, just basking in the feeling of him.

Of the man you love.

“Well-“ And you can hear the grin in his voice, “Not completely alone.”

You open your eyes, confused by his response but as you try and look back at him, he is jerking his head towards the trees. At first you are confused by the amazed expression on his face but, when you see the mix of orange and black moving through the forest in the distance, you gasp in understanding.

“Is that?”

“A tiger?” He chuckles and when you look back once more, to confirm your suspicion, he winks at you, “It most certainly is.”

“Should we be worried?” You breathe, quite amazed yourself. The tiger doesn’t seem agitated from what you can tell, they merely move through the trees slowly- seemingly locked onto a destination.

“No, this one I have seen before.” He replies confidently, “They maintain their distance just fine…” Yoongi pauses for a moment and, then smiles to himself, “Unless of course, he falls in love…then we’ll never get him to leave.”

[idv-marythefairy]

Hello^^

Is your request open ? If yes, can I request for Naib general relationship headcanon ? (Like that Eli and Luca one)

Thank you and keep up your hardwork, don't forget to stay healthy and hydrated ❤️

of course you can!! requests are always open!! you too stay health and hydrated!! take care of yourselves, guys 😍!!

WARNING: the way i interpret naib’s personality is MY personal opinion and the vibes i get from his character build are MINE. whether you, guys, agree or not is your opinion and i respect that. please, don’t attack me in the comments!

NAIB X READER HEADCANONS:

naib was a very closed-off guy

it took everyone a bit of time to get him out of his shell and make him more sociable, approachable

he stuck around you because you offered him a sense of comfort

he always made you smile and laugh, that he considered -not his job- his duty his smile is SO freaking bright and suit him very much

this is one of the reason you fell HARD (i mean, me too and everybody else like-)

he can be very childish but knows when to be serious

you can sometimes hear him cheer for everyone in the lobby including himself and you

he’s never actually fell in love before and the things you made him feel kind of... scared him

one day, you didn’t notice his cheerful and bright presence... actually you didn’t even see him at all

he had locked himself in his room and refused to get out

no, but, like, why did he feel like this when he was around YOU?

what is this feeling he is unable to explain?

you thought that maybe he hadn’t woken up yet and let it go for the time being but noticing how time passed and there was no sign of the mercenary with that big and beautiful smile on his face made you worry a lot

you approached norton who only told you that he was just as worried as you

you two went to confront him 

when you reached his room, you knocked three times but unfortunately you received no reply

what was going on?

“naib? are you sleeping?” 

he refused to reply... how could he when you made his heart pulsate so fast and his mind go blank?

he just tightened the blanket he had wrapped around his skinny silhouette

“naib, are you in there?” 

“go away!”

he finally shouted

“naib, it’s me, norton. we came here because we’re worried about you! open the door and come outside to grab food!”

“i said: leave me alone!”

did you do something to him that may have caused this behavior?

you started rolling old memories to remember whether you actually said or did something to upset him but no, there was nothing...

“did we do something? please, answer us this at least!”

“no, now go! leave!”

“naib-”

norton put a stop to your outburst, it would only make naib feel worse

naib’s nature is quite complicated so the best thing to do was to just give him the space he needed

you really hoped that ou didn’t mess anything up for him to feel this way

“i’ll go talk to him later, okay? don’t worry about it, you know how naib is. i’m sure he’ll come out eventually! he wouldn’t want to miss out on the cake.”

a few hours later, you noticed that norton had disappeared which made you assume that he was talking to the moody mercenary

norton and eli were in naib’s dorm 

the two males could tell, from what naib told them, that he was... in love?

“WHAT?!”

he didn’t take it well... he was... scared...

he decided to come out of his room (he was extremely anxious about it), ready to do the one and only thing he knew best: avoid you

eli and norton tried to get him to talk to you but naib was set on never speaking a word about his feelings towards you... he was scared that he would hurt you one way or another

but... he loves you so much...

no, he must remain strong, build walls and the feelings will eventually fade away

but NOPE :) the more he saw you the “worse” it got 

so he tried to avoid the matches in which he was paired up with you but norton and eli knew before naib could leave the Grand Hall and dragged him all the way to the lobby

well, he felt... awkward...

you tried to approach him and noticed that he was stiff and replied in a dry and cold manner and you decided to bug him no more about it

although you did feel very bad about leaving him at that and not conversing his behavior further

in the match you went to decode with him, hoping that he would talk to you about what’s on his mind but instead he... left...

“help me!” you shouted at him, thinking that he would turn to help you decode but he didn’t budge... he just left and didn’t look back

you had been crushing on him for a while now and this behavior upset you a lot

it was the worst thing he could do to you and i’m not going to lie, he thought of the same thing 

his plan wasn’t to hurt but he guessed that this was all he was good at: hurting others

he just wanted to return back to normal, eliminate his feelings for you and instead of just allowing them, leaving them be and just tell you already, he just chickened out, he let his fears overtake him

norton and eli had a plan... a good one too

they insisted on naib telling you how he truly felt but seeing how the mercenary refused to do so, they decided they were going pull a little trick on him AND, unfortunately, you too

norton handed a note to naib that requested a place and time to meet him

the same note was passed to you too

you two came to that spot at the same time and trust my when i say that you both didn;t want to be there at that time

norton tricked you... didn’t he?

“naib, please don’t leave.”

before he could make a move, you grabbed the back of his jacket and prevented any possible attempt of him running away for the billionth time

“just tell me what’s going on!”

he was pretty emotional about it but eventually told you

“I LOVE YOU, OKAY?! I’M SO IN LOVE WITH YOU I THINK I’M DYING!”

well, that was... unexpected...

he’s not a bad lover, he embraced you and your relationship a tad bit slow but he did in the end

he’s not a big PDA fan but will show affection when he thinks it’s needed

don’t expect long and passionate kisses in front of others, he reserves those for when you two are alone

he can get a bit jealous and possessive and all you need to do is cuddle him

he’s a small spoon for the most part, he doesn’t mind being the big one though, don’t get me wrong on this one

his love, i imagine, is this pure and sweet type of love that can make angles cry

naib is a very soft and sweet guy

he can switch to being intimidating and cold when he feels that either of you or your relationship is being threatened and will do anything to remove whatever is blocking your guys’ path

big fan of giving you head pats, lifting you up and spinning you around and playfully pinching your cheek

“look at that baby face, your cheeks are so squishy!!” “STAHHHHHP!!!!”

he takes you out on very cute dates, he takes you stargazing, for a walk in the forest, you guys make flower crowns for each other (you showed him how to make one bc my baby was so clueless </3)

you guys have MANY inside jokes and can make a pretty chaotic duo once you get used to your relationship

you two are just like me and my best friend: laugh ALL the time at the most childish thing, SUPER chaotic and the dumb type of funny (hi eve, i just wanted to tell you η μάνα σου :) <3)

you two bully the hunters (depends on who it is actually)

you listen to music together, hang out together a lot and play video games together

he lets you play with his hair and style them as much as you wish as long as you let him play with yours too, ofc

YOU TWO ARE SO CUE TOGETHER I CAN’T-

he tries to bake your favorite sweets and meals but he gets to a point where he just feels as he’ll burn the kitchen so you can guess that he requires assistance, YOUR assistance when it comes to using the kitchen to make something

you two can’t sit in one place for not even a second so you take this opportunity to do a lot of crazy things

you dye each other’s hair, paint each other’s nails and do each other’s make-up

you introduce him to whatever you’re passionate about and that helped him not only open up to you more but, also, share his very own interests with the only person he’s truly close with

HOW CAN SOMEONE BE SO HOT AND RESPECTFUL!!!

if you say “no”, it’s a no, he won’t even think about pushing you into something you don’t want/don’t feel comfortable with

he just wants to keep you safe and make you feel good 24/7

999/10 would recommend this guy, he’s dating material for me

[thoughtfullyyoungduck]

can you do a teen losers club x reader on how they comfort the reader during a depressive stage

A/N: Sorry it took so long! I hope you still enjoy! I just want to stress that all the headcanons I wrote here are based on my own experiences with depression. I know everyone experiences this differently, so please know I’m not trying to invalided anyone!

Warning: mentions of depression

- It’s difficult to predict when a depressive episode of yours will be occurring

- There are no outward signs, as you are very good at pretending everything is fine.

- Inwards though, your mood starts the deteriorating and the smile you have to conjure up your face every time you hang out deters the closer you get to an actual depressive episode.

- The only sign that is noticeable to the losers, is that you’re a lot more irritable.

- That’s a hard symptom to spot though, because their group is so diverse and it happens from time to time that someone does something that rubs the other the wrong way.

- You’re always very patient with everyone, even Richie’s overachieving and at times insensitive jokes, but right before an episode, you’ll at best ignore them, and at worst beep him.

- But again, sometimes little fights break out among the group, so it’s not that unusual

- They’ll know that a depressive episode has started when you cancel without a reason.

- You would never pass an opportunity to bike around town with your friends otherwise, but during the first few days of your depressive episode (when you feel at your lowest because of the impending days of hell waiting for you), you prefer to be by yourself.

- The only way you communicate is by calling them to cancel the plans, and then you crawl back in your bed.

- The losers at first leave you too (they found out from experience that you hate to be coddled and Gavin the vicinity of other people

- Of course this saddens the losers, because they want nothing more but to go over to your place and comfort you to the best of their abilities, but they understand you need some alone time.

- They do call regularly. They can’t stop themselves from at least doing that.

- After about two days, they’ll start hanging out at your house.

- Most of the time they’ll talk amongst each other or watch a movie while they cuddle with you.

- Never forcing you to talk of anything, because they respect that you can’t conjure up enough energy to do that.

- Side note; the losers all have various experiences with depression.

- Some may not have (had) it, but they have seen someone near them that was suffering from it.

- So they try to encourage you through what they believe is the best option, and how they would have liked to be cheered up.

- I think Eddie would be a bit of a hard ass.

- Not that he’s unsympathetic to what you’re dealing with, but he’s a health freak, and he read that excercing can help with overcoming a depressive episode.

- Which is true, but going to school and getting you work done is hard enough without getting yourself out of bed and into work out gear.

- So he really tries to convince you to do yoga with him, as your form of sport. (It leads to Richie’s big gay crises, and it draws a laugh out of you for the very first time since you have been feeling dragged down)

- Sometimes you can persuade yourself into getting up (it really depends on the day) and then you feel elated that you managed to do something, but others days you refuse to move, and Eddie’s insistence only leads to insecurity and you labeling yourself as Lazy.

- But you know Eddie means no harm by it, so you appreciate his efforts.

- Bev does things a little different.

- She’s very intuitive to people’s mood, so when she comes up with a plan to help you, and she sees you’re not up for it, she’ll postpone.

- She manipulates your kindness and generosity towards others and turns it around to you.

- Showering and keeping yourself clean, though it’s advice to do in order to get better, can be so hard to do, so she instead asks if you can help her with for example: braiding her hair

- No matter how bad you feel, you’ll always be there for your friends, so you say yes.

- You’ll braid her hair or paint her nails, or give your opinion about a clothing item, and in turn, Bev will do the same for you.

- It’s not much, but, having your hair combed, or changing clothes sometimes can make a world of difference.

- Richie and Stan will aid with doing every day chores, like homework or doing the dishes or something.

- Of course Richie also cracks jokes and tries his impression on you to make you laugh, but he’s also really smart and can do his homework without ever paying attention in class.

- So he and Stan take some of the workload of off you, so you can focus primarily on your mental health.

- Ben helps by talking to you. You’re not always up for a talk, because it’s hard to formulate the mess in your head, but if you do, Ben is always the person to go to.

- He won’t try to find a solution, but he’ll just be there to listen to you

- Mike bakes a lot of goodies for you to munch on.

- You’re supposed to eat healthy food, but Mike chooses baked goods that are both healthy and tasty, and sometimes a little indulgent.

- Freshman year in high school Mike got a dog from his grandfather, and he’ll take him with him to your house from time to time, so you can snuggle with the cute little thing.

- Finally, Bill writes you stories about going on far away travels, with you and the losers as the main characters.

- You like to read them because they help you escape your current situation, and also because the stories are a kind of promise, that your feelings will end and that one day you’ll be able to go anywhere you want with all your friends by your side.

- It takes a while, but eventually the efforts of the losers come to bloom.

- You appreciate everything the losers do for you, and you hope they know that you would do the same thing for them.

[vinylhazza]

A Lesson Learned (E.D) Part 2.

Summary: Y/n speaks out of turn in class, her filthy mouth giving her more than just a slap on the wrist - but a detention with her favorite teacher. Ethan finds himself at a loss when he falls back into the same mistake he vowed to never make again. He just can’t shake her loose. 

Word Count: 9.6k

Warning: the dirtiest of smut 

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It was a week before Ethan saw her again. The short break they had before the last week of class was much needed, but when he laid his eyes on her soft features once again, he found it more difficult to keep his eyes averted than he first anticipated. It was a tradition to give the girls a full week to mule over their studies before finals, just to catch up and make sure they can have all the knowledge crammed into their heads before they returned to take those dreaded tests awaiting them. Normally he would be excited to come back into the classroom and get the year finished off with a bang, but he had other things on his mind this time around. He had her on his mind this time. 

He could see the knowing look on her face where she sat in the back, her delicate legs crossed, foot bouncing lazily while she chewed on the end of her pencil near the eraser. Her bright doe eyes trained on him with no shame, only knowledge about what glorious sight remained under the suit he was wearing. It made him squirm more than he would like. She had this glimmer in her eye that screamed about what they had done, and if you looked hard enough, they would tell the full story to anyone that would listen. He could tell she was itching to come clean, tell someone about how he fucked his student into his desk and had the nerve to face her again. It made him more nervous than he’d been when she sunk onto his lap for the first time a week ago. 

He had panicked all week, worried that someone had found out about their dirty little secret and was waiting for the right moment to pounce. He figured maybe he wouldn’t be able to trust her to not tell one of her friends, brag about seducing her teacher out of everyone. Gloat that she could nail him. Just a rumor at an all girls school could end him. Of course there had been plenty of speculations made about him, but never ones involving another student. They were comments about how big his dick might be, girls talking about how he’d look with them bent over their desks, thrusting into them hard and deep. He’s even confiscated several notes being passed in class about such speculations. 

The young girls at the school were...bold to say the least. When they wanted something - they made it as obvious as they could. Perks of being raised in a well-off household he’s sure. He doesn’t want anyone to think he’s a prude, however. Because that isn’t the case at all. He loves sex, adored it, craved it more than he thought he should, he just didn’t want to entertain these little girls fantasies of his dick ripping them in two. Because it wouldn't happen. Not until her at least. He was flattered - of course - that these girls thought of him that way. Boosted his ego if he’s being honest. But he kept that to himself, gave himself a moment to smile about it while he washed his dishes after dinner or laid in bed thinking about the next day. He gave himself a second to feel at least a little cocky over having the girls pining after him, and then he was done. 

The point here being, he doesn't fall into the trap. He doesn't give in and have girls bent over his desk at any given moment and fuck them senseless like he knew he could if he wanted to. So much opportunity. But no desire. So why on God’s merciful green earth had he given into her so easily? Why hadn't he tried harder to resist her? It made him think long and hard. And he was almost ashamed of the conclusion he had come to. He was almost ashamed to say that...he’s always wanted her. From the moment he saw her bat her eyelashes at him first semester, to the last time her skirt had swooshed a piece of stray paper onto the floor from his desk on ‘accident’. He’d wanted her all this time. Not only her body was immaculate, but her mind was a force to be reckoned. He noticed himself spending more time on her papers and stories than any other student, not caring when she exceeded the word limit because it was so damn good. He was lost within her words on so many occasions and knew deep in the pit of his stomach he fell for both her words and her body all at the same time. 

It made him sick. 

Sick to his fucking stomach every time his dick became far too restricted in his pants at the thought of her curves and shivers while their bodies danced an erotic routine that day. Sick to his stomach to think of the soft grin she gave him before she exited his door, like she really cared for him as a person. She wasn’t stupid. That’s what made this whole thing so incredibly wrong is that she wasn’t tricked into anything, and as much as he’d like to claim that he was - he knows the real truth. He wanted it. He had always wanted it. Wanted her. And he still does. 

One thing was for sure, she wasn't stupid. She knew what she wanted and she knew how to drive him right to the cusp of insanity, waving at him on the ledge with that innocent little smirk she wore at that very moment, sneaky and devious. A heathen that waited for him to try and back away from the ledge before pulling him right back down again. She continued to sit there, chewing on the damn pencil like she didn't know that his cock was straining in his pants with every minute that passed. A silent killer at the back of the classroom that watched him ramble on and on about something he couldn’t give two fucks about. He could only wish for the bell to ring and her to leave so he could take a full breath again instead of this suffocating desire to rip her clothes off and fuck her into a coma right on that tiny desk she sat in. 

She wasn’t really listening, staring up and down his body with patient eyes, scanning him, observing him, waiting for him. She knew every single part of him. She was the only one sitting in the room that did. The only one that knew just how far he could sink into a cunt that ached for him, the only one that knew what his groans sounded like, the grunting of exertion, the smacking of his lips as he kissed her. Only she knew of his sins. Only she could really fantasize of the sound he made when he came, how his muscular body tensed and shook while he fucked her into a place she missed every day since. She knew the way her walls clung to his cock like a lifeline, the smell of him, the taste of him, and most of all how bullshit his ‘good boy’ attitude really was. He was a fucking machine and she knew. But he was stubborn. So stubborn in fact, that she knew it would be near impossible to get bent over that desk like she had been before, he would try and defy her again and again until she gave up. Convinced it was a mistake. But she knew better. 

Of course she wasn't planning to force herself on him again, that was a one time only situation that had honestly been more surprising to her than anyone else. She wasn’t that bold of a person on really any occasion. But something in her snapped when she saw the way his jaw clenched as her skirt twirled around her that day, focused on the sway of her hips while she tread lightly to his desk to confess her desires. If she was being honest, she freaked the fuck out that she had been so forward the first time - terrified that he hadn't actually given consent and she had forced him into something he never really wanted. It drove her insane to think that she had been so insensitive. 

But then she remembered the way he yanked her panties down to her ankles and practically drooled at the sight of her drenched pussy. Stared at her like he was starving for far too long. Touched it with hands that had no other purpose but to relish in the gift of pleasure it gave him. She remembered the way he sunk into her heat, so delicious, so needy, so desperate. She was his sanctuary for that moment. He wasn't above the every day average man when it came to desire, he had his needs. But he fucked her better than anyone ever had. He paid close attention to the way her body reacted to his touch, followed it’s instructions, silent orders, gave into it’s pleas for a connection. Something no man - or boy rather - has ever come close to. Because that’s the truth, she’s only ever fucked boys...but Ethan...he was a man. 

She wasn’t an imbocile, she knew it was wrong, what she was doing. What she wanted to do again. She knew it was wrong and it could ruin much more than her sanity. But she couldn't help that her body yearned for him every second that passed, the way she longed for him even in her dreams. Their first mistake was one she wanted to make over and over. And if she had it her way, they would. 

Ethan was a good teacher, there wasn't a way around that. He was open, considerate, intelligent, and allowed the girls in his class to speak freely on their views and opinions. He was under the impression that life revolved around self - expression and connection. He held impeccable class discussions, patiently waiting for everyone to make their point, explore it, and move on. He knew the girls loved him for more than just his looks, hence why he put up with the nonsense for so long. However; one thing he wished he could go back and change, was the freeness. He was lenient, that was no lie. So much so, that when conversation drifted to sex during their class discussions, he was unable to tame it down and get back onto the original topic. He remained stuck in a constant loop of questions - so often he questioned if he was an English teacher or a Health teacher at times. Health was a poor excuse of a class at the school he had to admit, it did nothing to actually focus on safe sex and the topics the girls actually needed to learn to practice said safe sex. Not that he was condoning the act but - the point being that he felt guilty if he didn't give them an outlet. They were comfortable enough to come to him, be open with him and with the class, have fabulous discussions, manage to focus it around the literature and modern day problems, and sometimes even come to a solution or conclusion that satisfied the class and himself. He didn't want to take it away from them in fear that if they didn't talk about it with each other, with him, with their peers in a safe space, they might not ever get the chance and end up making life altering decisions that they don't fully understand. 

That is how he found himself standing patiently at the front of the class, rocking back and forth on the balls of his heels, waiting for a small redhead to continue on with why she had raised her hand. First it had been about the recent reading, but then, of course, as it often did, sex was brought up. Any other time, that wouldn't be an issue...but now...with her staring at him, waiting for him to give advice to a little girl when it meant something different to both of them, it felt...different. 

“All I’m saying is that guys have way more pressure to lose their virginities”, Jinny speaks up from the back of the class close to her desk. Everyone listened intently, hanging on her every word like she spoke gospel. She was regularly speaking out in class, it was a wonder she didn't sit in the front row, but he knew deep down she was in a long term relationship with Wanda - who sat next to her and played footsie with her while he lectured. They thought it was innocent enough, but he saw. She was also close friends with Y/n, walking with their arms intertwined from the classroom more times than not. It was no wonder she was so confident, “it’s a double edged sword for girls, always has been, if you have sex you're a ‘slut’, if you don't you’re a prude.” Her tone was accusatory, frustration leaking out of her. They usually get worked up when class discussion starts and he gives them free reign to say what they thought of the reading and how it applies to their life. Jinny was always the most fired of up, Wanda close behind with her hand raised in the air. 

Y/n watched the man she daydreamed about become flustered almost immediately. He didn't agree. That much was clear in the furrow of his brow and the hand that flew through his hair one time over. He smacked his ruby lips before finally giving a response, she knew it wouldn't be a statement, but a question to keep the conversation going. Because of course, people are predictable. He’d said that once and she never forgot it. She never forgot anything he said. 

“Good point Jinny. But don’t you agree that it would cause more pressure on the woman for that very reason? I presume it would be hard to choose whether to be a ‘slut’ or a ‘prude’. Do you think it would confuse a young woman on the choices she would make with her body?” he ponders, ignoring the childish giggling at his language. 

Her eyes burned into him, his cheeks a rosy red while he waited for a response, not daring to look in her direction. He imagined she was smirking, the little devil she was. 

“Most of those opinions were made by men, though. Girls shouldn't listen to society on something that will stay with them forever. We own our bodies and I think it’s bullshit -”

“Language,” he interjects calmly. 

“- for men to try and control us just because they have this idea in their head that they are essential for our pleasure. Which, newsflash, they aren't. So I say, do what you want. Men don't control us. They just try so hard to. They feel like sex defines them, so it should define us too.” 

“It is very difficult for young girls nowadays with the social norms, I agree.” He’s nodding, pulling at the stubble on his chin while he thinks about her surprisingly valid point. It was bullshit their special moments ‘belonged’ to men. That it was something to be expected and disrespected all at the same time. 

Y/n watched the girls around her swoon in Mr. Dolan’s direction, leaning on their elbows and batting their chunky mascara lined eyelashes at him like he would give a damn. It was hilarious. So hilarious that she clamped a hand over her own mouth, giggle being caught in her throat as she doubled over, Ethan’s gaze flicking to her for a moment for the first time in what seemed like thirty minutes. He frowned. She was hiding a smile. He had to hold back his own when it dropped from her face, result of eyes turning to watch her. 

Ethan had to say something to her now and she knew it. She had drawn attention to herself in an important conversation and it would be nothing but honorable of him to take notice. 

“Something amusing Miss Y/l/n?” 

“N-no, sir,” she sputtered with a shake of her head, still trying to keep the laughter at bay, “nothing funny at all.”

“I didn't think so. Please try your best to pay attention to your peers.” He pointed a frown at her, warning her with his eyes. 

But he had chosen the wrong day to give her attention. She was feeling ballsy. She was ready to have her fun. She could just feel the way his breath caught in his windpipe as the first words left her mouth, cutting him off from furthering the conversation with the class. 

“Actually, sir,” she piped up, sitting forward in her chair, elbows on the wooden top, lips in a soft pout, staring hard at him. She didn't like that he was being a dick to her, especially in front of all the girls that want to fuck him and find every opportunity to get on his good side. She had tried to hide her laugh behind her hand, so why had he called her out in front of everyone? Just to embarrass her? Make her blush? 

“There is something kind of funny. You see the thing is,” she scooched to the edge of her seat, ready to rile him up like she knew she could, “you're a man. So...I respect you shooting your shit up there but you don't quite understand girls the way you think, or hope, you do.” 

Bingo. His prominent eyebrow raised while he turned to look her directly in the eyes, a ghost of a smirk playing on his lips. Careful little one, they seemed to sing to her. 

“Hm, care to explain Miss Y/l/n?” 

A gentle nod. Ethan hoped and prayed with all his might that her goal was not to punish him, out him in front of a room full of his students. Hoped she was just irritated and feeling feisty, but not enough to potentially ruin his career - even if that fate is truly held within his own hands and not that of a teenager. Fuck a teenager...how could he be so stup-

“You’re implying that all girls feel the sense of duty when it comes to their sexual endeavors, like they don't have a choice and have to choose one way or the other because that’s just how things are. You’re proving the point, Mr. Dolan that men truly don't get that inserting themselves where it doesn't belong is a part of the problem. But you’re forgetting one thing,” another quirk of his eyebrow, dashing asshole he was, “some girls are virgins because they choose to be, not because they feel they have to be. Sometimes it’s really just about the comfort and confidence of the woman. Take me for example. I don't feel pressure to have sex because I'm secure enough to control my body, but if I wanna go out and get fucked, then I can.” She let it slip past her lips, the big F bomb, without thinking about it - feeling all eyes in the room turn to fully gawk at her for being so bold in front of the teacher. Ethan didn't even bat an eyelash, knowing she cussed a lot and not registering it as inappropriate in the moment, too focused on how hilarious it was that she was claiming to control her body. Bullshit is all it was. 

“Of course Y/n,” he smirked, giving his lips a quick pass with his tongue, “thank you for sharing that with us.” 

Dear God stop talking you insolent girl, they will know if you keep testing the limits. He scolded her with all the brain power he had, imagining that if he thought hard enough, she would get the hint and shut her fucking mouth. 

“She kind of has a point, sir,” little Erica quipped from across the room, gesturing to Y/n softly. He turned to her in the third row, using the opportunity to tear his eyes away from the back where she stared him down with that same glimmer she had that day. Damn her for always looking so pretty. “It’s really all about Feminism. We need Feminism so girls can feel more comfortable breaking out of the norms placed on us by males and feel free - so to say - to have a lot of sex and not feel shamed for it.” 

Y/n nodded her head in thought, smacking her lips and joining her fingers together on the desk in a pile, smirking directly at Mr. Dolan. “I totally agree that we need Feminism. We always have with these jackasses running the world. But, fuck that, I don’t need a man’s approval of equality to take a dick when I want to.” 

As to be expected, laughter immediately made a roar throughout the classroom. Y/n sat back in her chair in triumph, raising her hands up in an ‘I don't know what to tell you’ motion, only making him that much more irritated than before. Why couldn't she just be a good girl for once? Always a heathen. His voice was near drowned out in the noise, his hands coming up to push down the air - reminding himself briefly of a celebrity shushing a crowd. Almost made him chuckle, but he held it inside. 

“Girls - hey, quiet down please,” his stern voice called over the chattering, stuffing one hand into his pocket while the other continued it’s up and down motion, “C’mon hush. Calm down. You know this isn't the appropriate behavior to show your instructor.” He sighed in thanks when the chattering came down to a quiet buzz, knowing it’s as good as it’s going to get. He nodded in recognition, then turned to stare hard an Y/n, a stern look on his face. He wasn't happy - and she loved it. A string of heat traveled from her stomach all the way down to her heat, knowing what his frustration can really do. She was clenching just at the small of his irises growing bigger each second. 

“Thank you for that once again Miss Y/l/n, but maybe you can keep your comments to yourself from now on.” Typical teacher. Shutting her down just as she was starting to have fun. He has a way of doing that. She didn’t speak much, only when she felt it important enough to share with everyone - but when she did everyone liked her for it. Her fiery passion was always a winner for the class. But she didn't let it go to her head, she still preferred to be a bit more reserved. “If you wish to look on page 27 for a reference feel free to do so, but as for everyone else let’s move on to discuss the topic at hand - misogyny in modern times!” 

Class went on as it always did, granted it was far less entertaining when she wasn't frustrating him and making him squirm behind his pathetic little pedestal he always leans on in lectures. For now it was serving it’s purpose to hide his bulge that just wouldn't go away no matter how many times he thought of repulsive things he thought would get his brain off her pussy that he longed for. So close yet so far away. But she was making him angry, speaking out of turn in front of everyone just to get a rise out of him? It was unacceptable. She could feel his eyes linger on her every now and then, but he didn't dare say another word in front of the class, knowing it would just get the girls going again. It made her a bit sad, if she’s honest. Maybe she had overstepped. She had used bad language in front of the entire class, after all. She knew what that usually meant: detention. And she hated detention, but he hadn't brought it up to her thus far and she wasn't going to raise her hand just to ask to be punished. The punishment she craved was something far different. 

She eyed him over the pages of her frayed book, typing away on his MacBook Pro like nothing unholy and dirty had ever happened at the desk he sat at. Like he hadn't sinned on that desk. Like he hadn't given her exactly what she’d dreamt about for so long on that very same desk he kept tapping a pencil on. His secretive gaze burnt the skin of her face, a rosy color coming to her cheeks under it’s pressure. 

But he was angry. He was irritated. He was beyond worried about his actions. He should have called her out in front of everyone, ripped off that blue detention slip from his desk and told her to watch her mouth and learn some respect before he has to send her to the principals office. He should have used his authority to discipline her like he did every other student that acted out in class. But he didn't. He just sat there and typed away on a document like nothing ever happened. Warming up to her. Picking his favorite like he vowed to never do. 

He mewled over it for the remainder of class, let her go? or make her stay after and be alone when he knows it won’t end well? The seconds ticked on like molasses, slower and slower and slower, until that blessed bell finally rung throughout the silent classroom - the girls shooting up out of their chairs, stuffing their belongings into their bags, and waving to him as they exited the classroom. That’s when he caught her on her arm, preventing her from walking about the door. “Stay behind for a moment,” he’d said, giving her nothing but a stern frown and a firm hand around her bicep. Too firm. Firm enough to send a message. Don’t test me. 

The remaining girls leaving the classroom shuffled out through the tension, whispering amongst themselves about her getting in trouble. She normally would have been embarrassed but couldn't find it in herself with his hand still squeezing at her. 

“Sit in a desk,” he tuts, dropping her arm and turning back to mutter a soft, “please.” He wasn't a dick of course. 

Ethan watched Y/n saunter to a tiny wooden desk, pulling her a chair out and plopping into it with a heavy sigh and a bitter attitude. She wasn't happy, but then again neither was he. She thought for a minute he was giving her a warning, but her heart sunk when she peered at him from under her eyelashes - strolling to his desk with a smirk. His smirk was for him and him alone, amused at what he was about to make her do. Maybe this would be his one up. He was trying desperately to grasp that authority she’d taken from him, and maybe an old fashioned punishment was just the way to do it. Show her that she can’t get away with whatever she wanted to simply because she’d seduced him into fucking her. 

She glared hard at the pen and paper in his hand, raising a daring eyebrow up at him when he slides the white sheet in front of her, the pen coming down soon after with a click. Is he serious? Is he really going to make her-

“Get Comfortable. You’ll sit here all lunch and write lines. Like the good ole days.” 

That fucker. 

Her scowl was menacing. If looks could kill he’d be on the ground lifeless.��“You want me to write lines? For what fucking reason? I joined in on the class discussion like you always want me too. You’re punishing me for answering your question?” 

“No. I’m punishing you for using inappropriate language in front of your superior and class, Y/n. Your actions have consequences,” he drones on, quite pleased with the reaction he’s getting out of her. Now she feels a fraction of his rage. Mistakes have to be repented. 

He turns his back to her, shoulder blades moving in a hypnotizing fashion beneath his blazer. He doesn't give much explanation after that, sinking down into the swivel chair they had fucked on only a few weeks ago. He could feel her staring still, watching his every move. How could he be so hot and such a jackass all at once? He’s doing this not because of her language, but because he’s mad at himself for giving into her. But he wanted it too. He can’t say that he didn’t when he had ravaged her like a wild animal on the desk he rests his elbows on now. 

Well he’s going to learn she’s a lot harder to break than a bad habit. 

With a smirk of her own she tucks the blue inked pen between her fingers, sliding the piece of paper closer to her - getting comfortable like he said, of course. She’s accepting her punishment. 

She blinks at him with an innocent gleam to her eyes, a devil in disguise, clicking her tongue on the roof of her mouth, “So what am I supposed to write, Mr. Dolan?” 

“I will not use the word ‘fuck’ during my English Class. One hundred and fifty times.” Snarky bitch. He’s wiggling his nose in the most adorable way, trying to hide a smile. Jesus that smile will kill her, she feels it eating away at her frustration already. Ethan settles back in his desk, a delighted sigh easing past his lips. He loved being an asshole sometimes. Especially to little girls that don’t like to listen. Or one little girl, rather. 

Without even thinking she’s rolling her eyes with a dramatic huff, “Doesn't that defeat the entire purpose Ethan?” Oops. 

“Mr. Dolan,” he corrects smoothly. 

Hard ball. She can roll with that. 

“Fine,” she sing-songs, an idea much better flashing into her head at his obvious impatient tone. 

With her attention focused on her assignment, he had the time to look at her as much as he pleased - scribbling on the bright white sheet, becoming much less white with every blue line traced on the surface. Five minutes. It didn't take her but five minutes to scribble down the entire front side of the sheet. He didn't acknowledge the paper when she first placed it on the desk, instead looking to the clock on the wall with a frown settled on his face. He hadn't expected her to be done that fast. It was only when he noticed her milky thighs in front of his face, standing in front of his desk still and waiting, that he checked the sheet for the content. She peered down at him scanning the paper with his dark brows pulled tight , that adorable little frown tugging at the corners of his mouth again. 

He couldn't deny it. She looked adorable in her uniform. Skirt pulled up with no tights, knee high socks the only article covering her legs. Which, in his opinion, wasn’t enough. The white blouse dipped into the cravat of her breasts, bust on full display - just hidden enough to pass the radar. Her hair was pulled into a high ponytail, baby hairs pulled down to frame her face. She had even pulled out a set of heels she hadn't worn in a while just to see his eyes travel down and land on the black strappy excuses for shoes. It made her shiver just to see him try and hide the fact that he was looking. But it was also hilarious, considering he’d seen much more than that. He kept that frown on locked and loaded, blinking at the paper like he couldn't believe what he was reading. 

“I will not fuck my teacher in English class,” he mumbles, almost afraid to say the words out loud. 

“Eighty times look!” she grinned, motioning to the amount on the sheet, like she wasn't teasing him into insanity. 

Ethan didn't know what to do. He was caught at a crossroads, every way to turn was the wrong way. He couldn't very well send her to the principals office, he would for sure get found out then. Even a wild dream could get him fired for the simple immorality. If he got lucky he might not get fired, but being monitored almost seemed worse. They were so careful at the school, but somehow not careful enough. Just the thought of someone finding the paper had him crumpling it into a ball almost immediately, watching Y/n pout out her bottom lip in mock sadness. Ethan tossed the paper into the bin by his desk, wasting her hard work. 

“Alright, Y/n,” Ethan sighed, looking up at her cheeky smile, “It’s clear you can’t behave in my class or act like the young adult that you are.” 

“I’m really sorry, sir,” she simpers, twisting on the toes of her heels. She’s really putting on a show, blinking her full eyelashes at him, twisting her fingers at the bottom of her skirt. She’s not sorry. She isn't and never would be. 

“Miss Y/l/n, I’m serious. It’s time to stop this foolishness before you get yourself into more trouble than a lunch detention,” he grits through his teeth, not liking the nearly undetected rubbing of her thighs in front of his face - but he noticed. 

“What foolishness do you mean?” she’s teasing him again, leaning down to rest her small hand next to his elbow on the desk, some hair from her ponytail swinging around in front of her face, her breath moves the hairs slightly with every puff. He waits for her to finish, feeling deep down that she hasn't got to the punchline of her little joke here and he just wants it all to be over before he’s stuck in another secret he can’t stop beating himself up over, “I’m just telling you the truth, daddy.” 

It was condescending and evil just like the smile she gave him at that very same moment. Who knew such a little word could have such a big impact? His head snapped up within a second, knowing it’s probably the exact reaction she wanted from him. But that was the last word she expected to fall from her mouth, so strong and confident it almost sounded right. He had the thought of leaving the classroom himself, just walking away from her and the festering heat rising up within himself every second she leans over the shiny wood of his desk. God she was a demon. 

“Get out. Get out of my classroom right now,” he ordered finally after finding his voice. He made every attempt at making it firm and serious, no shakiness or she will be feed on it like a parasite - see right through his fragile mask. 

“No,” she dares. Another smirk. 

“Did I stutter? You either leave now or I make you,” he orders one more time, a pathetic lie he pulled out of his ass in a second. 

“Fuck you,” she hummed, staring into his dark hazel eyes, continuing to be amazed at the steady dilation of his pupils. Whether it was anger or something else, she wasn't sure. 

“Miss. Y/l/n.” He tutted at her language, temper ready to boil over. 

“Mr. Dolan.” She matches his tone, grinning so bright you’d think he’d given her a present. 

“Why is it so hard for you to understand the proper teacher, student relationship? Are you not grasping that last week was a mistake? A moment of weakness for the both of us? Something that never. should. have. happened? All you’re doing now is making me angry and being a brat-”

“Oh cry me a fucking river,” she sneered at his frowning face, that same evil tug of her lips still there. “You fucked me, remember? You said yes. You bent me over this fucking desk and railed me harder than you probably have any other woman and you loved it, Ethan. You didn't have any complaints with your cum going down my throat. Why do you take so much shame in it? Am I really that horrible that you have to convince yourself you didn't take it all the way?” 

“Y/n, I could lose my job because of you. I could lose everything. My freedom, my sanity, everything. Why don’t you get that?” Ethan whispered back to her angrily. He was fuming now just thinking about the possible outcomes if their little secret ever became public. 

“You don’t get to blame me for your lack of control over your own dick baby, that’s what you aren't going to do. You didn't have any hesitation whipping your cock out of those slacks before with your own hands.” 

“You know what?” Ethan seemed to snap. He knew he wasn't thinking clearly again, his only thought being that he wanted to get her filthy little mouth shut. He was furious at her. Not because she was wrong. But because she was right. And it made him angry. 

“What daddy?” There that word was again. She stood up straight once again, biting her lip and clenching her thighs together only to get him angrier. 

“You like being bent over my desk so much bitch? Bend over my fucking desk then,” Ethan growled, reaching forward to wrap his fist around her ponytail, lowering her shocked-filled face to the cool surface of the desk. Well this is familiar. 

“There’s those fucking balls,” she triumphs, grinning to herself when his hand lands down on her cheek with a harsh slap. 

“Little slut likes to be spanked huh?” he’s muttering, yanking her skirt up and over her ass. White lace panties. White fucking lace. The pathetic fabric hardly covered any inch of the skin on her backside, curving down to cover that beautiful pussy he missed so much. His face strained into an agonized frown, it physically pained him to see her bent over with white fucking lace, “Maybe then you’ll learn to watch your filthy mouth.” 

“Yes sir I do,” she nods, wiggling her hips back at him, “Please make me your good girl. I don’t wanna write lines anymore, daddy please don’t make me.” 

“You just refuse to listen,” he growled once again, pulling down the lace to sit just below her ass, laying his hand down for a slap once more, “You need to learn to listen.” Her flesh shakes under his hand, his jaw clenching at the faint red handprint that was left behind after spanking her only once. The cold metal of his ring leaves an imprint of it’s own, sure to be a reminder the next day of their little affair. He continued to litter her backside with slap after slap, grinning down at her arching her back into the desk, moaning loudly and wiggling her hips to try and run. With a grab at her skin he’s leaning into her ear, “That’s right baby, moan for me, that feels good doesn't it? You like it when I punish you?”

He gets a frantic nod as his answer, a little whine to follow soon after. The pain felt good, really good. She never thought she would be the one to like pain in such an intense way, but just the stinging of her ass made her wetter than she ever has been. She knows by now her arousal is making its way onto her thighs. 

“Teach me how to listen, sir,” she fires back after catching her breath, her chest hurting from being pressed so hard to the desk, rubbing from him spanking her. She jumps at his hand making contact again with a grunt. He’s so mean. But she likes it. 

“Be fucking quiet.” Assertive. So very dominant. 

“Yes, sir,” she promised, still huffing desperately, an attempt at catching her breath. He gave one last smack on her ass before he rid her of her panties completely, yanking them down until they pool at her ankles. Before she can moan out at the cool air hitting her cunt for the first time he’s grabbing at her shoulders and standing her back up, flipping her around by her waist so her now sore and reddened ass rests on the edge of the desk. She audibly gasps, wincing slightly when he scoots her up and onto the wooden surface. He feels for her when her tiny hand grips at his forearm, knowing it’s a reaction from the pain. To her surprised, he stopped and crouched down to eye level, grabbing her chin gently. 

“You okay?” The way he said it was soft, but also so concerned that she had to give him a big smile and a little nod. 

“Yeah,” she assured him, grabbing at the back of his neck and pulling him to hover right above her lips. “Fuck me,” she whispered, begging him with her eyes that he always had a weakness for. She knows deep down the pain just turned her on more. 

“I can’t,” he grunted, parting her legs only to fit himself between them, “you know we can't baby.” 

“Come on please? Just one more time. Just once please,” she whimpered, watching him dip down onto his knees in front of her. Y/n bit at her lip as she looked down at his face between her legs. Throwing her legs over his strong shoulders only made it harder for her to control herself, wanting him to go down on her like a wild animal, no holds barred. Just instinct. Her fingers toyed with the buttons on her blouse, undoing them one by one to exposed her budding breasts, wanting him to see everything. Ethan gripped her legs, pulling her to the edge of the desk once again, looking over her shimmering cunt. She was so wet she was practically dripping on his desk, making a mess. Clearly desperate for his mouth, she grinds her hips to try and meet her pussy to his mouth, pouting when he rears back to look at her. 

“Keep your mouth shut, understood?” He waits for her nod before leaning back in, kissing first at her thighs that already shake with anticipation, before sticking his tongue out to lick a thick stripe up her pussy. He teases her for what seems like an eternity - blowing cool air through his lips, biting love marks into the skin of her thighs, licking everywhere but where she wanted him the most. She could swear she screamed when his lips finally wrapped around her clit, sucking and sucking and sucking, dancing his tongue around the sensitive nub. Her legs threatened to shut his head between her thighs, only stopping when two hands rested on her knees, keeping them apart while he worked wonders on her aching pussy. 

“Oh yes - fuck - that’s it,” she praised him between quick gasps, blissful content written all over her beautiful face. He ate her out like he was starving, sloshing sounds ringing throughout the classroom, mixing with her squeals and whines. Y/n fisted his hair, wrapping her fingers around those dark locks that he played with when he was nervous, holding his face to her pussy securely. There was a part of her that felt high with power as she held his face to her pussy, forcing his lips to keep kissing and sucking at her. It made her feel like in some way, she had the one up.

Staring down at him was hard enough as it was with the way he was working her so good, slacking his jaw further, dipping his tongue into her entrance repeatedly, sighing at how wet she was. Her hips grinded on his face, needing that extra bit of friction to really make her see stars. When he brought his hands up to assist her, she was sure she blacked out for a moment. He kept pushing that skilled tongue inside of her to feel how hot she was for him. How desperate she was for him. It had him holding back the hardest he ever has before. He promised himself over and over that he wouldn't fuck her again. That he couldn't. That is was an impossible task he was only to achieve one time. But the way she clamped around his tongue had his mind racing with defiant thoughts. Y/n wasn't good for his health. She filled his thoughts with sin. She made him stumble over himself when he taught his classes, batting her eyelashes at him with fake innocence. She hiked her skirt up higher every single day, just to see his eyes flicker down to capture the smooth skin of her legs. He knew he needed to be clear headed, but all he could seem to do was think about how much he needed her. Needed to ruin her. Needed to be inside her. Needed to fuck her senseless. To be moving her gorgeous body down on his cock repeatedly. Make her cum for him. Make her cum so hard she didn't know any name but his. Needed to make her beg for him. 

Ethan looked up at her sliding her blouse and bra straps down, helping her tug the bra downwards so her breasts slipped out in the most perfect way. He squeezed one, tweaking her nipple between his finger and his thumb. His dick stirred in his pants at the feeling of her flesh in his hand. He moaned against her without meaning to, showing his true weakness for her body. She reached to grab the hand holding her breast, throwing her head back with a whine, holding his hand firm on her. She needed his touch everywhere.

With her head in space, she barely noticed him standing until his cologne washed over her senses, finally registering her movement. She let out another gasp as Ethan grabbed the back of her neck, leaning down close to finally rest his lips on her own, kissing her slowly. She clutched at his blazer while he kissed her deeply, swiping her tongue on his just to further stir that fire in her belly. Somewhere inside herself she fell deeper, not so much into the kiss, but into him. So much so that she pulled back, resting her forehead against his for a break, pushing her bare dripping pussy to his slacks that were pulled tight from his bulge. 

“Are you going to fuck me, Mr. Dolan?” she hummed, her finger tracing the outline of his strong jaw, leaning in to peck at his heated cheeks. 

“No, Y/n.” 

“But why?” she pouted, unsatisfied with his answer. Her best puppy dog eyes followed her whining, eyelashes batting at him again. 

“Because, angel, you’re going to fuck me,” he decided, some how convincing himself that’s the answer to his problem, “come here.” His hands are on her hips once again, tugging them both back to his chair, falling messily onto the cushion, but neither seemed to notice, or much less care. 

Y/n went to straddle Ethan’s lap right away, frowning and blinking fast when he pushed her navel away with a bit of force. The frown was replaced with a delighted smirk when he tugged his belt free. 

“Turn around,” he demanded, unmoving while he waited for her to obey him. Realizing he was waiting she complies, rising from his lap and turning around, feeling his hands back on her waist, caressing her skin while she hovered over his lap, legs spread. 

He couldn't pull himself out of his pants fast enough, growling in frustration and sighing in content when he was finally released from the restricting fabric. His underwear followed soon after, a shudder running through his shoulders at how good it felt to be free. His greedy hand wrapped around his length, jerking it while she waited for his command, rubbing his thumb over his reddened tip, his breath catching in surprise as his cock twitched in his own fist. It was driving her wild, hearing his own hand moving against his own length, wanting it to be so deep in her that she let out a pathetic “Daddy hurry.” Oh God what he would do to hear that again. So genuine and sweet. That word did something to him he just couldn't understand. 

Letting go of his cock for a moment, he gripped her hips, ushering her slowly down onto him. She caught on quickly, grabbing the hand holding her side, feeling his cock pushing into her. She stopped halfway down, stuttering on her own moan, taking a second to relish at his size. She was stretched out good, so full already, she didn't know how she had it so easy the last time. Ethan grunted at her stalled hips, wrapping her ponytail around his fist, yanking her head back so her neck was exposed and her ear was level with his mouth. 

“Take all of me,” he growled, “I know you fucking can. I’m only halfway baby.” 

“I ca- Daddy! Oh fuck!” she squealed, grabbing at his hand with a tremor, “You’re so big.” 

“You got this. Take me slow,” he grunted, pushing her hips down slowly, biting his own lip at how she clamped down tight around him. She cried as he bottomed out, hitting a place inside her she didn't even know existed, wiggling on his lap. This is what she wanted. She wanted him deep, fucking up into her guts with pants spilling from his mouth every few seconds, hands leaving bruises from how tight he gripped her hips. She loved this shit. 

She swallowed down another cry as she began to roll her ass back to him, using his knees to steady her while she slid up and down his cock. Slowly at first, appreciating the feeling of his cock impaling her in the most delicious way. No man has ever affected her the way that he does. Her ass bounced against his stomach, a slap echoing throughout the classroom, her pussy continuing to clench around him like a death grip. Both of them loving the wet filthy noise of their dirty little secret. She could feel her dainty ‘angel’ necklace bounce against her chest every time she sunk down on him, loving the irony of the situation. From the corner of her eye she could see her heels and socks somewhere underneath his desk. 

Ethan took the time to undo the rest of her bra, snapping the clasp open and sliding the straps down her arms. With the bra falling to the floor, her breasts were soon covered once again by his greedy hands, palming them as she rode him. She leaned back into his front, giving him a view of her front at she bounced back on him. He moaned at the sight of her flesh bouncing in his hands, pinching her nipples lovingly. Y/n let out the loudest moan yet, jumping when his hand reached up to smack over her mouth, silencing her. She continued to moan into his hand, tears running down her cheeks and into his palm, his other hand reaching around to rub at her clit. 

Within an instant she came, without really meaning to it seemed. Lurching forward in his lap, he was quick to catch her shaking body. A full body orgasm was the only way to describe it. Dropping her head forward, she bit lightly at his palm, trying her hardest not to scream out into the empty room of desks. It was too tempting to shout his name to the heavens. Just to let her dear Lord and savior know what she had done. 

“Oh my fucking God,” she breathed, dropping back against his front to circle her hips, mewling in his lap. So fucking good, she thought to herself. But Ethan wasn't done with her yet. Within a second he had her bent back over his desk, her ass up in the air as he sunk back into her cunt, taking him deep and hard. Her fingers digging into the wood in desperation as he ruined her, thrusting and rolling at an incredible pace. 

He couldn't stop himself from bringing his hand down to her ass again, jiving his hips into her over and over again. He stilled for a moment, breathing staggered and erratic, but choked on his spit when she started fucking herself back on his cock, refusing to let that high fade away when she was so close to that beautiful euphoria once again. 

“You’re doing so good - that’s right fuck yourself with my cock you dirty bitch,” he groaned, hand smacking the stinging skin of her ass, “can’t handle it can you?” 

She shakes her head, but her hips never stop moving. Her hands steady herself on the surface of the desk, more leverage to rock her hips back to hear that smack of their skin meeting. Her walls flutter just as his nails run down her back, scratching at her, needing to express just how much she was affecting him. He was losing it, moaning loud in her ear. He’s moving his hips once again, harder, more force put into his movements, railing her into the desk with a locked jaw and a furrowed brow. 

He’s climbing up the hill, grabbing her hands to hold them to the lower part of her back, wanting that complete control he craved so much. His stomach clenched and he knew what was coming just as he fell off the edge, knowing she was right there with him. He came hot and deep inside her, pumping himself through their climaxes, screaming her name out, his moans mixed with hers into a beautiful melody. He sighed to himself, collecting his bearings like he’d passed out, looking down at her still rocking back on him slowly, so addicted to the feeling of him she couldn't stop. 

She laid there quietly to get her breathing under control, afraid to turn around and see what would surely be one of the most beautiful sights she’s ever seen - Ethan post climax. Big, sweaty, powerful. She waited for him to slip his cock from her still clenching hole, wincing from the lack of him. He looked down at himself, covered with both of their messes, smiling to himself. 

He guided her around to sit back down on the desk, fitting himself between her legs and cupping her face in his hands - a strong wave of affection washing over him for the young girl he’d just fucked speechless. He kissed her, really kissed her. Took his time moving his lips in sync with hers, shushing her as she tried to speak through it - wanting to know if he was satisfied and if he regretted it. He knew if he spoke he would have to admit that he didn't. He didn't regret a damn thing. It was so wrong but so right all at the same time. He just focused on sweet little Y/n, with her hands holding his forearms, breath-taken by the deepest kiss she’s ever experienced. It was something she was going to miss as soon as it ended, the way they fit like puzzle pieces. 

He was pulling away far too soon her liking, smiling when she leaned forward to capture his lips again, sucking at his tongue and then his bottom lip, drinking him in as long as she could before the fairytale had to come to an end again. 

With her feet flat on the ground, she dressed herself quickly, knowing the bell would ring soon and the rest of the girls would flood the hallways like roaches, ruining this perfect moment for her. They watched each other as they dressed, neither wanting to look away for too long. It was bittersweet. She redid her hair in a high ponytail, knowing she would take shower next period in her gym class, but still didn't want to look like she was just railed into a desk by her teacher. That wouldn't be good on any spectrum. 

She rolled up the sock on her left leg, finally standing straight to look at his face deep in though. 

Oh no, she thought to herself, already knowing what he is going to say before he opens his mouth. 

“You know this can’t happen again right?” There is was, the cussed denial he keeps putting himself into. It almost made her laugh, because even he didn't sound like he believed himself. But she gave him points for his effort. You don't kiss people like that if you never want it to happen again. 

“Mmhm,” she nodded, playing along with a pout. Without anything other than a hum she leans into a bottom drawer of his desk, pulling out a fresh sheet of paper, peeling off the corner, grabbing the nearest pen, and writes something on the scrap. He watches her closely, wanting to know what on earth she could be writing after what they had just done, but not daring to say a word. It would hurt too much. 

She clicks the pen closed, turning to him while swinging her backpack over her shoulder, holding out the small white piece of paper for him to grab. With a nervous hand he grabs the note just as she’s leaning in to kiss him, lips landing on his and sending him into a frenzy once again. He cups her face, sealing his lips to hers and drinking her in before she pulls away. It’s the last time of course. 

“Oh and just for you know...future reference...this classroom is kind of...dreary isn't it?” she smirked down at him, watching him take in the phone number written messily on the ripped paper, a little heart following the seven digits in the most innocent way. He stared down with a tongue running over his lips, tasting her on him for the last time that day. 

He looked up long enough to see her disappear through the door again, off to her next class, leaving him distraught, confused, and most of all - totally and completely hooked. 

Tagged: @dolandolll​ @livelongdolan​ @dolandares @graysavant​ @i-love-the-dolantwins​ @s100204​ @zeusgrayson​ @episkygrant​ @confettidols​ @dopedoodes​ @yungbludsswegd​ @aquadolan​ @jjustjoy​ @vilealmond​ @godolan​ @stayalivw​ @callllumhood​ @ryxgrantdolan​ @dolanpornhub​

[imagine-loki]

Stitching The Wounds, Chapter 5

TITLE: Stitching The Wounds CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 5 AUTHOR: fanficshiddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine Loki and Kilgrave are Alphas and feel a spark with the same omega. RATING: M

Leona felt weird when she went to the café with Loki and Kilgrave.

She felt oddly calm and secure with them at either side of her on the way there. Now and then one of their hands would gently but firmly guide her at her lower back, or take hold of her elbow when dodging other people on the pavement.

When they got to the café, they picked a nice little table next to the window in the corner. Loki sat next to her and Kilgrave sat opposite. It was a quiet place, but really nice and quirky. It had good music playing and a big selection of food and drinks on the menu.

‘Have whatever you like, pet.’ Kilgrave said when Leona picked up the menu.

She wasn’t used to eating a lot, so she knew she should take it easy. Not wanting to overload herself with food so quickly. So she ordered a toastie and coffee.

‘Is that all you’re having?’ Kilgrave asked. ‘There are lots of nice cakes too.’

‘Are you both feeders or something?’ Leona asked with a slight smirk, making them chuckle.

‘I’d enjoy it while you can, Kilgrave is a bit of a health freak when it comes to food usually.’ Loki grinned. ‘But you need to get your strength up for now.’

‘My strength is fine.’ Leona said as the waiter brought their drinks over.

‘Trust me, doll. You’re going to need plenty of strength and sustenance with us.’ Kilgrave winked at her.

Leona didn’t respond, she just concentrated on drinking her coffee. Enjoying the warmth as it flowed down her body. It had been a while since she had a decent cup of coffee.

‘Were you ever claimed, properly, with any previous Alphas?’ Loki asked.

‘I’ve only had two attempted relationships with an Alpha over the years. I know Mrs Stanton will have likely made out there was hundreds of attempts at getting me to fit with someone.’ Leona sighed. ‘I’ve had quite a lot of first dates, though. That all ended badly, mainly because of me being broken.’ Loki and Kilgrave both stiffened when she said that.

Loki leaned over and put his hand firmly on her thigh, squeezing. Making her heart race a little and she was slightly surprised.

‘Do not say that, doll. What did we tell you about the rules? Do not say that again, or I will bend you right over my knee, right here, right now, and spank you.’ He growled into her ear, making her supress a shiver.

She ignored the warning and continued with what she was saying. Unsure whether he would be serious about his threat. Also unsure about whether she wanted that to happen or not… Part of her did, but she knew that would be a bad idea so she tried to quickly move on before her sassy mouth got her into trouble in public.  

‘So, that was aside from two Alphas that I got passed first date with. But those two just thought they’d be able to tame me. The first one wasn’t very… dominant. I guess is the right word. Nothing much ended up happening, he got bored of me very quickly. Not even a week. He didn’t claim me, not in any of the sense of it.

The second one, the one who got violent with me… Was unfortunately my first time and he did claim me, but he didn’t mark me. It was only the once though. And uhm, when he got violent with me, I walked out on him. We were only together for about three weeks.’

Loki and Kilgrave were so pleased she was opening up to them. It was actually more than they had expected this early in the game. Leona was surprised, too. But there was just something about them that made her want them to know. That she knew deep down she could trust them… Or so she certainly hoped, now she was in this deep already.

Loki’s grip on her thigh had loosened and he was lightly rubbing his thumb across her. Even through her jeans she could feel her skin was on fire under his touch.

The waiter came with their food, so they changed the subject to something else. Saving the more private conversations for back home.

‘What do you want to do with your life? Do you want to have a career, or?’ Kilgrave asked while they ate.

Omegas were split nowadays. Half wanted to get careers and work, like the Alphas. But the other half was still in the frame of mind where they just wanted to stay at home and be there for their Alphas needs. It was usually up to the omega now, what they wanted to do.

Leona shrugged. ‘I dunno. I’d given up hope on having an Alpha, or a proper life. So I haven’t given it much thought.’

‘Well, we are of the opinion it’s down to the omega what she wants to do in life. We are open to whatever you decide you want to do. And will support you, of course.’ Loki said softly.

She looked at him with her eyes wide for a second.

‘Really?’

‘Of course.’ Loki nodded.

Leona laughed and shook her head. ‘You’re acting like you’re definitely going to keep me.’

Kilgrave and Loki both frowned.

‘We are keeping you, Leona.’ Kilgrave said sternly. ‘There was a spark, sparks never lie. And don’t you dare say anything to talk yourself down.’ He said knowingly.

She looked down at her food and concentrated on that again.

Loki and Kilgrave realised that even with her rather tough exterior, she had such a vulnerable side to her. It was clear she was worried she was going to be abandoned again, chucked out.

Once they finished, Loki ordered them all a slice of cake.

‘You’re going to get me fat!’ She laughed a little when it arrived, it was making her mouth water.

‘You need a bit more meat on you anyway, doll. Don’t fret.’ Loki chuckled. Making her smile.

They were pleased to see she did relax more and more. When they left the café, they went home but took the long way through the park. Chatting away in a relaxed manner, just finding out more about her. They shared their hobbies, likes and dislikes.

‘I guess having an Alpha that’s a doctor might come in handy.’ She said after Kilgrave had told her a bit about his work.

Kilgrave chuckled. ‘Hopefully you won’t need my skills, but yes. I guess it isn’t a bad thing.’

The more time she spent with them, the more she was letting herself accept the fact they wanted to be her Alphas. Though there would always be a part of her that was worried, unsure… She hoped in time it would disappear.

When they got back to Loki’s, Leona went for a nap as she was tired mentally. The Alphas understood, so told her they’d wake her when it was dinner time.

‘I think she will settle quickly.’ Loki said to Kilgrave as they grabbed a beer from the kitchen.

‘I think so too.’ Kilgrave nodded. ‘Her personality is slowly starting to show. It’s no wonder she has trust issues though.’

‘I still can’t believe her parents chucked her out.’ Loki frowned and sighed. ‘It’s not her fault she was in an accident.’

‘I know… What are we going to do about us two?’ Kilgrave asked as they sat down in the living room.

‘Yes. That crossed my mind too, it’s a weird situation. I guess you don’t need to rush to find your own place. If she is our omega, she will want to live with both of us. I think going back and fore to two different houses wouldn’t be too good for her.’

‘So, you wouldn’t mind me staying?’ Kilgrave smirked.

Loki shrugged. ‘You’re alright company.’ He teased, chuckling. ‘Besides, having half the rent paid won’t be so bad for me.’

Kilgrave laughed. ‘True. Means we can spend more on our darling new omega.’ Kilgrave grinned.

‘Exactly.’ Loki grinned back at him and they raised their beer bottles to one another.

-

Loki wandered upstairs to wake Leona from her nap, but as he opened the door and stepped inside, he was hit with the delicious smell of her arousal.

His eyes widened in delight at the sight before him too. She was on top of her covers and was only wearing a t-shirt. Her hand was delved down between her thighs, two fingers buried inside of her cunt.

‘WHAT THE HELL!’ Leona screeched at Loki walking into her room.

She quickly removed her hand from between her thighs and scrambled to hide herself under the blanket, face bright red and eyes blazing in a mixture of arousal and anger at being interrupted.

Loki smirked and folded his arms over his chest. ‘That was quite the sight, doll.’ He purred, licking his lips.

She ignored the spark of arousal that hit her from seeing him. And ignored the fact she was so close to cumming before she had been interrupted.

‘Do you not know how to KNOCK?’ She snarled at him.

‘What’s going on?’ Kilgrave asked as he appeared, having heard the commotion. His eyes darkened slightly when he smelt her arousal in the air as soon as he walked into the room. He barely suppressed a groan of his own.

‘I was masturbating! So what? It’s not a crime!’ Leona huffed.

Loki and Kilgrave walked over to her, one at either side of the bed and they sat down on the edges.

‘Nothing wrong with pleasuring yourself at all.’ Loki hummed, sliding his hand under the blanket to take hold of her wrist, pulling it out from underneath the blanket. He lifted her hand up towards him, first he sniffed at her two fingers that were still wet. Her eyes widened and she tried to ignore the feeling of excitement in her stomach.

Loki slipped his tongue out and he licked her fingers for a moment, moaning at her taste. ‘I’m just sorry I didn’t walk in while you were cumming. Now, I’m sure that is a sight to behold.’

‘Loki.’ Kilgrave tsked. ‘You’ve left our poor omega hanging?’

Loki glanced over at Kilgrave, letting Leona take her hand back as he smirked. ‘I didn’t tell her to stop.’ He chuckled.

Leona rolled her eyes.

‘Well, the gentlemanly thing to do would be to finish the job for her.’ Kilgrave said and winked at Leona.

‘It certainly would be.’ Loki growled.

Her eyes widened and her stomach leapt in excitement. Of course, while masturbating she had been thinking about the two Alphas… Not that she would ever admit it to them, obviously.

‘Why don’t you get comfortable on Kilgrave’s lap, darling. Let me finish what you started.’ Loki purred, pulling the blanket back, revealing her. She closed her thighs together tightly at first, slightly wary, but also wanting it to happen too.

Kilgrave got on the bed and crossed his legs over, he took hold of Leona and with ease lifted her onto his lap, so her bum was just off his legs and her upper back was against his chest. She squeaked at how easily he had moved her.

Loki knelt on the bed and gently took hold of her ankles, slowly spreading her legs open. He winked at her and stroked up and down her legs as he moved between them.

She put her hands down to cover herself, but Loki tsked softly as Kilgrave reached down and took hold of her wrists, bringing them up around the back of his neck.

‘Keep your hands behind my neck.’ Kilgrave said softly as he slid his hands under her top and stroked across her sides.

Leona squirmed in excitement, her breathing already deeper than it was before. Loki got comfortable and started kissing along her inner thigh, slowly working his way higher and higher. She closed her eyes and gasped slightly when she felt his warm breath against her. But he teased her and moved across to her other thigh, kissing and sucking there for a while.

Kilgrave’s hands started roaming, he lightly tickled across her abdomen, then worked his hands higher under her top.

She was completely enveloped in them both, their scents and having their hands on her. It was quite overwhelming.

Loki started gently squeezing her thighs when he finally started paying attention to where she wanted him to be the most. He softly licked and suckled on her folds, she was already so wet from her own previous ministrations.

Removing one hand from her thigh, he spread her wide open, she was glistening wet and smelled absolutely delicious. He took a long lick right up her, making her tremble and gasp. He then licked up and down either side of her clit. Driving her insane already.

She tilted her head back against Kilgrave’s chest, his hands had wandered even further up and he was carefully squeezing her breasts, now and then he rubbed her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers.

But when she let go of his neck and started to reach down to grab Loki’s hair, Kilgrave pinched her nipples quite hard. Making her yelp.

‘Ow! Asshole!’ She huffed at him.

‘Behave.’ Loki snarled, turning his head to the side to bite her inner thigh, making her yelp once more.

She was about to curse at him too, but he glared up at her, raising an eyebrow. She knew what they wanted, so she put her hands up behind Kilgrave’s neck again, desperate to cum. Only then did they continue the sweet pleasure.

Loki lapped on her clit with the flat of his tongue, then he added two fingers to the mix. When he inserted them, he took a few minutes to explore, twisting and curling until he found the exact spot that made her whimper and buck against him. But Kilgrave was holding her steady in place on his lap, still manipulating her nipples.

As Loki kept stroking over that sweet spot deep within her, he used the tip of his tongue to stroke her clit in a more precise way. Alternating between fast and slow licks, weirdly in time with what Kilgrave’s fingers were doing on her nipples.

‘Ohhh god! Please!’ She cried out, desperate now.

Loki’s ears perked up at hearing her begging. He smirked against her and continued with what he was doing, but this time he kept the same rhythm and picked up the pace a little with thrusting his fingers into her. He couldn’t get enough of her, of what she had to offer him. She was far too delicious.

With Kilgrave constantly tweaking and rubbing her nipples, it was no wonder she came hard. Squirting all over Loki’s mouth and chin, making such a mess. Her moans and whimpers were like music to the Alphas ears.

When Loki sat up, he reached out and cupped her cheek. She was completely blissed out, eyes struggling to remain open. Her body was so sensitive, Kilgrave was still gently fondling her breasts and she was shuddering in pleasure now and then.

‘Give me your hand, doll.’ Loki reached up, waiting to take her hand.

She only just registered what he said, she was feeling far too good to argue, so took her hands off Kilgrave’s neck and put one into Loki’s hand. She was a bit confused when he brought her hand down to her cunt.

‘Scoop some of your delightful wetness up, doll. Let Kilgrave have a taste.’ He hummed, smiling when she did as she was told.

She used two fingers and dipped them just inside, they were so wet as she lifted them up to Kilgrave’s mouth. He took her fingers into her mouth and lavished them with his tongue, moaning around them as he closed his eyes, revelling in her taste.

‘Mmm, wonderful.’ He purred.

Loki smiled at Leona and leaned into her, kissing her forehead. Making her feel weird and fluttery inside.

‘Am I forgiven now for bursting in on you?’ He smirked, stroking her cheek with the back of his hand.

‘Mmm… I suppose.’ She shrugged a little.

Leona felt the vibrations from Kilgrave’s chest against her back as he chuckled. He wrapped his arm around her waist and gave her a squeeze. Then he leaned down to speak right into her ear, making her shiver a little.

‘While we seemed to have skipped straight to dessert, I think we should go have dinner now.’

[ae0nx]

FRUITS BASKET S3 EPISODE 1 + 2 RECAP!

Yayyy! Season 3! Finally! I’m hoping this season will make me understand/sympathise with Akito and maybe even Shigure a little bit more because... honestly? My opinions on episode 2?... I might get some flack for my opinions on them...  😬

But, first: I’d like to appreciate how on the Funimation app we got a little interview/message from a few of the english dub VAs! Specifically Colleen Clinkenbeard, Jerry Jewell, Eric Vale, Ian Sinclair and Brina Palencia (Akito, Kyo, Yuki, Kureno and Isuzu). And it was nice seeing some of their opinions of the characters they play and how much they’re emotionally invested in the story. (Ian’s such a nerd ‘I wanna see giant mechs later this season’ 😂 - I lowkey stan him lol)

You should definitely check it out if you’re interested in what they would have to say!

ANYWAYS, let’s get into it...

---------------------------------------------------------------

EPISODE 1

I really love this depiction of the original zodiac and how you can just tell from the tone of the scene how desperately the God of the Zodiac was clinging on to these connections that they had with the participants in the banquet. How much they clung on to and loved the cat... Also, interesting how Tohru’s narrating this scene... almost like she can relate to the desperation of wanting to keep things the same... but we’ll get to that later. But also, Tohru is a God

This new opening is beautiful, I love the way that camera moves around the still illustrations and how the general tone just hammers down that... this season is gonna be some real shit lol (which makes me nervous for the opening for the second half 😳). It’s so warped and the general blue, grey and black tone that follows around every Akito scene we get in the anime has bled into every scene in this opening concerning the rest of the zodiac. Almost... like something is decaying. It’s great, it’s just very sad lol. I love the song tho, issa bop.

One of my favourite things in stories is when we get a bigger villain than the ‘pronounced’ villain of the story. Ren’s introduction through a manicured outstretched hand towards Kureno and Hatori is so weirdly gross in what it insinuates (especially when you apply her connection with Shigure) but again... I wanna know why she’s such an asshole to Akito specifically besides the bad mental health management within the Sohma compound. I have an inkling of what it is through memory of the manga, but like Akito and Shigure... I just wanna understand why.

Also, Ren is gorgeous and I’m sorry for simping. 

I mean... she’s kinda got a point? She just didn’t need to be so mean about it lol. It’s pretty clear that the connection the zodiac have to each other is real and something they cannot control. BUT, wouldn’t it be easier if this connection wasn’t perpetuated by outer circles of the family and if Akito herself wasn’t so cruel about it? But, I guess Akito - through her relationship with her mother - kinda doesn’t know how to genuinely show love and affection. (Which brings me into my thoughts of how the manga ends and how I kinda... have a few problems with it which I will get to... when that comes lol)

Lol - weeeeeeeee! (flashes back to Tohru being yeeted into the river). Is this a part of Akito’s god-like powers?!

Again. She’s got a point! They’ve both got a point. But, they’re both the source of the problem. It’s really painful to see two mentally ill people duke it out. This whole institution is just rotten.

- I am super curious about what Akira’s relationship was like with the zodiac and if it was just as dark. I’m gonna assume it slightly already was, as the exclusion and degradation of the cat curse is already dark in itself but maybe the rest of the zodiac were just fine with how things were? I dunno if we actually will get the full backstory of Akira and his zodiac but I’m definitely intrigued

Ok, but if four crying children came up to me after I’d just consummated with my partner to reach out at my stomach chanting ‘we’ve been waiting for you’. That would disturb me and scar me for a while too so... 😂. I know it’s supposed to be ethereal and spiritual but... dude, wtf lol

...I don’t like how much I’m into Ren being such a Villain™  😅

- Akito being seen as a crying child by the older zodiac members has always been interesting to me because yes, they could see her as that through mainly the age gap, general empathy and the way she sometimes irrationally acts out. But, also the depiction of Gods being seen as children having tantrums has being reflected in many different beliefs and myths (especially Greek Mythology) and I just like the fact that this all powerful, all knowing being would be compared to a child. It gives you a different perspective on power.

- Is the paper note in the CD case that Kureno gave back to Tohru an extra addition or was it always there?...

Mannnn... I really wanted Isuzu to fuck shit up after seeing Tohru so upset but... *le sigh* (outfit’s still on point)

But, I’m so glad we get an equal Ethereal Goddess to save Tohru! HANAJIMA! We love her, we stan her. <3

- ‘Tohru will be in my custody’ 🤣 I personally think Hana’s bluntness was a kindness in her conversation with Yuki because if I found Tohru upset? I’d automatically start firing metaphorical shots at everyone in that house

- Shigure fearing Hana makes me sleep better at night <3

Hana’s just like ‘hmm... sounds like someone I know... 👀’ I’m here for this parallel between Tohru and Kureno in the hopes that Tohru doesn’t ever get in as bad a situation as Kureno. Ahhh... Kureno... (Also, Laura Bailey was killing it in this scene as always)

- Hmmm... there’s something terribly poetic about Kyo saving Tohru’s scarf from oncoming traffic... but also, Kyo can’t help himself aha

KWEEEN! I love this look for Uo, it’s very Kyoko. I already said this in Season 1 but I STILL need to get wool-lined jacket. Outfit Appreciation goes to her - 3.5 stars.

<3<3<3 Friendship is magic!

- Megumi is such a good egg as always! From him going to get Uo to him being so wise with his outlook on love and how it takes time to really flourish. The best!

- This whole episode ends really nicely from Tohru’s return home and Kyo washing and returning Tohru’s scarf and Yuki being happy to see Tohru and Shigure being somewhat decent. It was nice to get a bit of relief after the tornado of emotions

Also, this was a nice screencap! Even Kyo is smiling!!! :))))

EPISODE 2

*takes sip of wine* ...ok.

👀... later lol

This scene really highlighted how Tohru is starting to see Shigure and the whole zodiac curse in a new and darker way. For the first time, it felt like Tohru was a little bit more guarded around Shigure and I hope they delve more into this season. Her description of her feeling around the curse being like a ‘dark well with no bottom in sight’ is pretty spot on. Ugh.

Aw! Is this the last we’re getting of Small!Momiji?! I love them :3 (Momiji’s shorts look a little shorter too, like he’s growing out of them ahaha)

- I haven’t found the Yuki fan club funny since their first scene in the anime but their poor disguises made me chuckle

- Yayyy! Kyo has an obsessive fan club too? ...Yay?? 😅 haha

- ‘I won’t kill them but they can go to hell’ why is Kyo speaking like me?! 😂

The fact that we got a scene of Yuki kinda admirably looking at a group of friends (boys and girls) playfully physically interacting and he unconsciously reaches out to Machi almost like he forgot about the curse? Heart eyes... 🥰

Again. Relatable. 😂 God, Yuki. You really are an airhead. Bless your soul. <3

And that look says it all. Damn. Kyo’s sense of hopelessness is heartbreaking but I still stand by it being understandable considering his circumstances.

Kyo freaking out about Tohru being visually upset was super cute but I couldn’t even appreciate the fluff because the whole scene had such a morbid tone to it, despite it being so visually romantic:

KYO’S FACE!!! 💔 Ahhh, my emotions!!!! Also, that shot from Tohru’s perspective under her bangs is great.

- Poor Mitsuru, I’d ask for extra pay just for dealing with Shigure’s ass.

Hahah - what a great metaphor!

- Now that Shigure’s ‘true form’, so to speak, has been fully exposed all his comments that are supposed to be teasing come off so much more awful. Him insinuating Mitsuru wasn’t ‘upper class’ enough for Ritsu was awful

COLLLDDDD. AS. IIIIIIICE. But seriously, Shigure this whole episode was cold in many different ways but I definitely felt this personally since I’ve been told something like this by a family member before... 😕 Also, it’s just gross how both Shigure and Akito are taking their own personal issues and mistrust of each other out on to other people. The curse and the institution behind the curse complicates a lot of feelings for sure, but there’s a difference between wrong and right and I get the general feeling that they both are just using the muddy waters to their advantage. Although, I feel like Shigure is taking more advantage of this than Akito but I’ll get into that in a bit.

- There’s also something about this episode that made me sympathise a lot more with Kureno in a more understandable way. But, it also makes me question the ending of this whole story and the resolutions that happen and what life for the whole Sohma institution/family looks like after the curse has broken.. I guess, I should read ‘Fruits Basket Another’ after this, huh?

😳... Shigure is so petty, man. Really?!

So...

I hate this relationship. I’m sorry. I know there are loads of people who like this relationship. And I’m still giving myself space for the show and the story to convince me why it’s worth it. But... I really don’t like this relationship. It’s so toxic. In so many ways. And in a weird way, this scene made me feel a LITTLE bit more for Akito than Shigure. It feels like Shigure gaslights everyone in his life but none no more than Akito, herself. I hate the fact that he keeps saying he loves her while hurting her or disregarding her. You know, almost like he’s treating her like a child. But on the other hand, I hate the fact that Akito has lowkey gaslighted herself into thinking she can treat people however she wants because she is ‘God’. I understand this is part of the way she was brought up and it seems like life in the Sohma compound has been very isolating for her so there’s been no one really to show her better (or have the confidence to show her better). But, at least I can be a little bit more sympathetic on her side than Shigure’s. I dunno... it’s just all very ugly and toxic and I’m hoping that it’ll turn around somehow.

I just hope it’s not one of those relationships that are ‘so good cos it’s so bad’.

...I’ll briefly talk about the ending theme to end this on a good note lol:

I really like this ending! I dunno if they’re gonna have two endings and two openings for this season but this ending definitely feels like it should’ve gone in the second half as it’s almost spoiler-y? But, then again what anime opening and ending isn’t packed with spoilers lol

All the illustrations are gorgeous, I’m assuming they were drawn by Takaya-sensei herself as it seems very much in her current style of artistry but my favourite illustrations are definitely the ones shown above! <3

---------------------------------------------------------

Ahhh! Fin! Sorry, about this one being super long and you probably having to scroll past a whole lot on your dash 😝 As usual, I had a lot to say. I’m open to hearing from people who actually like Shigure and Akito’s relationship btw, it’s just that everything before and episode 2 just really didn’t sail the ship for me, personally. I do want to understand! Haha

See you soooon!

[drlauralwalsh]

You and Your Grieving Parts

Do you ever think about your...parts?  No, not those parts, you mischievous little spark plug!  I mean inside your mind - the parts that get weird ideas, warn against danger, are mean to you, and tell you to engage in late-night food rituals.  That last part might just be me.  Seriously though, I’ve been doing some research into the parts of my mind. The idea that our minds have “parts” is not a new idea. Like right now, a part of me wants to keep writing to you and another part just wants to nap. Oh the drama inside! There is one theory that explains this and it has intrigued me since grad school: Internal Family Systems.

INTERNAL FAMILY SYSTEMS (IFS) THEORY

The IFS theory believes that the mind is made up of a number of sub-personalities or parts, each with their own set of beliefs, opinions, and responses, and that interact with each other.  At the core is the Self, which has the ability to lead the parts but isn’t always up to the task.  No single part is bad but like an orchestra, the parts can be in harmony or honk cacophonously like a flock of agitated geese.

Along with the core Self, IFS sorts the other parts into categories by function: Managers, Firefighters, and Exiles.  Managers and Firefighters protect you from feeling the pain of the Exile parts.  They have the same goals but use different strategies.  Managers constrict and hold you back while Firefighters automatically react and let it rip.

MANAGERS

Manager parts proactively run the day to day operations of the system and are considered the most “acceptable” parts because they say very adult things and sound most like the core Self.  They maintain balance within you through control.  Managers parts are perfectionist, judgmental, self critical or people pleasing.  They want to prevent humiliation and abandonment by keeping you busy, criticizing what you do, worrying, sabotaging connections, and generally being a control freak.  They strongly believe in self sufficiency and are generally relentless, exacting, chastising and sometimes, anxious and depressed.  They’re really good at giving you a false sense of security by telling you it’s doing it so you’ll look good to others.  A typical Manager thought is, “You really should stop bothering people with your sob story.”

FIREFIGHTERS

Firefighters are your first responders.  They automatically fly out the door to rescue you when something hits too close to home.  They extinguish the fire of pain by smothering or creating a diversion.  They attack “enemies” and get defensive in an effort to control or suffocate emotions.  These are the parts that have anger issues, spending too much money, drink too much or use drugs, get obsessive or suicidal, self harm, or dissociate.  They like to eat too much. binge watch TV and endlessly play video games for hours.  They don’t give a crap about the goody-goody manager parts.  Those weenies don’t know what it’s like to charge heroically into danger.  Firefighters are really good at distracting you from upsetting, painful or overwhelming feelings.  A typical Firefighter part thinks it’s better to rage than to show vulnerability - even in the privacy of your own head.

EXILES

As a psychologist, I get to see other people’s Exile parts more than the average person.  I’ve developed such a knack for it that the Managers and Firefighters appear almost transparent.  When I’m interacting with someone who’s leading with one of those parts, I can see through to the Exile it’s protecting.  Just wish I could more reliably turn that super power on myself!  Exiles are the younger parts that hold pain from the past.  You compartmentalize and isolate them from the rest of the system for their safety and stability in the system.  Because of their vulnerability, they also seem kind of dangerous.  They’re the parts of you that are scared of being abandoned, get intimidated, experienced trauma, and feel a lot of shame.  This is where the Big Four live - not good enough, too much, if you really knew me, and everyone leaves.

Exiles are desperate to tell their story but Managers pessimistically believe your pain is a burden to others. Firefighters flat out refuse to put you in danger of being hurt again.  If a sad, little kid part of you revealed a disgusting longing for an authority figure’s approval during a job interview, a Firefighter part might change the subject while a Manager sabotages the rest of the meeting.  Neo-exiles are the parts we hide within close relationships.  Imagine a romantic partner or friend that gives you attention when you’re doing something nice but ignores your bids for reassurance.  You’ll shut down the needy part of you to maintain the relationship. The message from that person you tell yourself is that only your good parts are acceptable.  

THE CORE SELF

So far, we’ve been describing the orchestra - or if you’d prefer, the various departments of your business or the governmental branches of your personal nation.  Let’s switch to the head of it all - the conductor, the CEO, the President, YOU.  In the center of all of this is your core Self.  It’s a beautiful place to be.  It doesn’t need work because it’s already perfect.  It spontaneously emerges when the air is clear and all is safe.  It is the natural essence of who you are and is sheltered from damage or destruction by function of your parts.  

You know you’re in your grounded center when you feel authentically chill.  Some theories describe the Self by the 8 C’s:

Confident

Courageous

Creative

Clarity

Compassion

Calm

Curious

Connected

I know I’m in that place when nothing said or done can move me off my square.  For instance, I am confident about my intelligence.  If some bozo tried to lecture me about how I’m really a dummy, I might get a little irritated but he’s not going to shake my confidence.  Now if the same bozo flicked some booger comment about something more vulnerable, that might temporarily knock me off-center.  Note: my own managers and firefighters have censored me from revealing said vulnerability for my own protection.

WORST CASE SCENARIO

Your personal configuration and manifestation of parts was constructed to deal with your worst case scenario to date.  Since we have different histories and experiences, each set of parts is like a fingerprint of the individual.  While I’m currently working hard to lead with my core Self, recent events (i.e. the death of my wife) have thrown the system into a reorg process.  All previous worst case scenarios were blown out of the water and my mind’s company is frantically looking for new hires in two main departments.  I thought I’d give you a peek into the frenetic remodeling of my inner Self as the parts run around with their pants on fire.

Exile: [Can’t speak and just cries endlessly into the void.]

Firefighter: “Oh shit!  Their wedding song started playing overhead at the grocery store!”

Manager: “It’s fine.  Everything is fine. Close your ears, stop being a baby and don’t think about it.”

Exile: “But I can’t stop thinking!” [Stops responding as snot clogs up nose.]

Firefighter: “Leave the store!  Leave your groceries where you are!”

Exile: [Blows nose, hides in deserted health food aisle.]

Manager: “Someone could have seen you out there.  Now go check out and remember to smile at the clerk.”

Firefighter: “I think it’s a great time to call it a day and watch more episodes of Designing Women.”

These parts are obviously clueless as to what to do with this newly emerged and devastatingly sad grief Exile.  She’s a little girl part of me that either pitifully weeps or gets hulk-smash rageful.  She isn’t a new part; she’s come out of semi-retirement to hold my overwhelming grief.  She believes that everyone will leave her and she’s left on her own to figure everything out.   She thinks things like, “Why don’t people notice how sad I am???” She doesn’t know a Firefighter distracts her from feeling with a stupid magic trick while a Manager runs around pulling the curtains around her so no one sees.  All the parts are trying to help but the animals are loose at the circus.  Though the Exile doesn’t know it, she’s waiting for my core Self to step in and corral the monkeys.  My Self knows what to do if I can only find and access it.  Stepping from the shadows, my centered Self brings a soothing presence that stops the commotion and quiets the protectors.  Here’s an example:

Manager: “You should shower and do a little cleaning.  This place is a mess!”

Firefighter: “Honestly, I think eating a little cookie butter will make things better.”

Exile: “[Sobbing] Things are never going to get better!  I don’t want them to get better!”

Firefighter: “I know!  Let’s listen to Rage Against the Machine really loud in the kitchen!”

Manager: “Fine, don’t shower even though you stink.  Don’t change clothes either.  It’s not like anyone sees you anyway.”

Firefighter: “Uhhh, isn’t that friend coming over tonight?”

Manager: “Oh yeah!  He’ll certainly notice those dishes that have been in the sink for 3 days.  Just sayin’...”

Exile: “Oh no!  [Hangs head in shame] People will find out how horribly disgusting I am because I haven’t run the dishwasher or broken down and recycled the Amazon boxes.”

Firefighter: “Just throw everything in the backyard!!!”

Manager: “Stack up all the piles neatly so it looks like you wanted them there on purpose.”

SELF: “Alright, let’s think about this.  What if you broke down the boxes right now, put them outside, rinse the dishes, and filled the dishwasher all while listening to Rage Against the Machine?”

Manager: “That’s not enough but okay, fine.”

Firefighter: “Great ideas as always.  I’m going to rest up for the next emergency.”

Exile: “Thank you for listening to me.  I feel a little better and I think we can do this.”

SELF: “Great. Afterwards, everyone can take a break and zone out in front of the TV.  Now put on that music and let’s get to work.”

WHO’S IN CHARGE?

As long as there’s no one in charge, your mind is a confusing and chaotic miasma of competing needs.  Ideally, the Self steps up and takes over negotiation between the parts and directs the next steps.  However, sometimes a part fills in the leadership role.  You know you’re leading with a Manager when you feel buttoned up, intellectually sharp and emotionally numbed out.  Leading with a Firefighter part feels like a continual state of irritability and agitation and keeps you ‘at the ready’ to react to danger.  Exiles are rarely in charge because they’re really bad at it.  They collapse the system and insist on activities like staying in bed all day.

WORKING WITH YOUR SYSTEM

As with most life problems, the first step is awareness. You’ve got to get to know your parts - their personalities, beliefs, and functions - before trying to intervene in their conflicts. Like I said before, there are no bad parts - just competing beliefs and strategies. A given part feels strongly that it’s right, sees it how it really is and knows the truth. Every thought or feeling originating from a part is trying to help you out, even if it doesn’t seem that way. The part of me that says no one wants to be around me is actually trying to protect me from rejection and abandonment. Unchallenged, that part will keep me from connecting to supportive people.

OBSERVING AND IDENTIFYING PARTS

It may be difficult to put your finger on and capture a particular part.  When you’re ready, there’s a few ways to access them.  Start by being curious and non-judgmental.  Think of your centered self as just a researcher interested in data collection.  Reassure yourself that nothing has to change as you’re presently in observation mode.  

Take your emotional temperature by asking yourself how you feel right now.  Ask to see what emotions are already present and how or where your body feels with that emotion.  Observe those messages that are on repeat in your mind.  Alternatively, you can access an upsetting memory from the past and examine it.  Ask yourself, what exactly was upsetting about what happened?  Did you feel afraid, sad, anxious, angry or something else?  How did you react and what did you do?  Did you rage, freeze, numb, avoid, or try to smooth it over?  These questions will reveal clues to what was exiled and what managers and/or firefighters protected you.  If at any time your brain says, “I don’t know,” consider that another protector part and explore accordingly.

STAYING CENTERED

Once you’ve got a handful of observations, pick out one voice and interview it.  More than likely, you’ll be talking to a protector - probably a manager.  Getting it talking by asking what it believes and it’s job in the system.  Ask how old it is and what it looks like.  A voice that says. “This isn’t fair,” may believe you get dumped on more than most and thinks the job is to  protest on your behalf.  It may show up as a finger wagging old man who suggests that something must be wrong with you because this keeps happening.  What’s protective about this voice?  What kind of Exile is it defending?  Be gentle with digging down to the Exiled little kid part underneath.  Kids are delicate and need protecting.  If you find yourself continuing to have strong emotions or becoming reactive, you’ve likely run into another manager or firefighter.  Interview and explore this part before moving deeper.  We can’t access, validate and utilize the burdened exiles without honoring how the system set itself up to protect us.

Once you’re working with a particular part, another angle is to check back in with your calm and centered Self.  What do you understand about the part?  What do you think is going on?  Can you find empathy and appreciation for the part?  Even our nastiest parts work really hard on our behalf.  A critical voice is mean but its heart is in the right place.  An obsessive or addictive part is trying to soothe the system in the best and only ways it knows so far.

TRUSTING RELATIONSHIPS

Getting to know your parts is the process of creating trusting relationships between them and the Self.  This is the next step in the process of converting your protectors and split-off exiles into your allies.  Think about how trust is built with other people: consistent interactions, listening to and honoring what’s said, believing their words are important - even when you don’t understand.  That’s exactly how we build rapport with the different parts of ourselves.  It may be scary or unpleasant to get close to your inner critic or the tightly-wound explosive rage but it’s a vital step.  Like a good CEO or President, once your core Self begins to get everyone on board, it’s easier to know what to do when life throws you the next curveball.

I’ve got a story for you from back when my wife was still alive.  I left to go grocery shopping but stopped in at the craft store to shop for just myself.   This nagging little voice kept popping up but I successfully shoved it back down at the craft store.   Entering the grocery store a short time later, I could no longer ignore a little girl voice on repeat: “She’s going to be mad at you!” Sighing, I got centered and engaged it.  Here’s how the conversation went:

Little Girl: “She’s going to be mad at you!”

SELF: “Okay, well, we can handle that.  Why will she be mad at me?”

Little Girl: “Because you took too much time at the craft store.”

SELF: “Why is that a big deal to you?  What are you feeling?”

Little Girl: “I’m worried she’ll be mad and call you selfish because you took time for yourself.”

SELF: “Okay, well if that happens, I’ll take care of it.  You don’t have to explain it to her.  I don’t think she’ll actually be mad but if she is, I’ll be in charge.  How does that sound?”

Little Girl: “I’m still worried but I’ll try it your way.”

SELF: “Great. Thank you for trusting me. No matter what, it will be okay.”

This is the actual transcription of me engaging with a worried part.  For the record, it’s not grounded in current reality.  Naturally, Patty would be concerned if I hadn’t returned from shopping if it had been a few hours but she wouldn’t be mad.  I already had a relationship with this part - the Little Girl.  She’s about 5 or 6 and feels too small and powerless to change things in the world.  She’s used to being  dismissed and pulls at my sleeve to warn me about all the monsters lurking in the shadows.  She’s protected by another part - my rebellious teenager.  If I’m not gentle with the Little Girl, the Rebel leaps to her defense and commandeer the entire system.  The Rebel says things like, “Oh no, you fucking didn’t just do that!  I’ll show you!” and promptly turns off all inhibition and motivation and steers us back to the craft store to buy $100 worth of crap.  I’ve learned my lesson - listen to and trust the Little Girl, or else it’ll cost me.

YOUR PARTS IN GRIEF

I’m still getting to know and lead the parts of me as they grieve.  As with outside life, my internal life was thrown into disarray after Patty died.  I had all the parts nicely organized, productive, and had good working relationships with all.  Death took my puny little shoebox diorama on the inside of my mind and… shook it up really hard.   I was so proud of my hand painted little figurines, all precisely glued in their rightful places.  A manager most assuredly came up with that idea.  Now, there’s a part of me that just wants to toss the whole thing and another part that’s picking up each piece, crying over its brokenness.  

All I can do is be patient with myself for now as I sort through the pieces in the shoebox.  I tried throwing it out but it just reappeared.  I’m working on getting the lay of the land.  I’m doing my best to accept and soothe the broken parts - even as they overreact, judge me for not keeping things cleaner, numb out with cookie butter, and cry at the grocery store.  We are trudging down the road right now but when I get to know everyone again, I’ll call a meeting and figure out what’s next.

[gildedmuse]

Anonymous asked:

do you like any of the one piece manga colorspreads? if yes, which ones?

(Apparently you cannot answer questions more than once which seems like a flaw. People can always change their mind.

Let's see, where did I leave off? Oh that's right. the Strawhats are a acid punk rock band now . So the obvious next step is...

Devil Fruit's Angels

That's right, in this universe the Strawhats aren't marauders of the sea. They're marauders of the open road.

Look at this badass biker gang. And I'm not abbreviating for motorcycles. Luffy heard there were such a thing as a biker gang and took it very literally. Best of all, he got eight people to go along with this.

Eventually, he accidentally tore the bottom wheel rim from his bike, the Going Merry, but then they met Franky and since he was unaware of Luffy's stupidity innocence at this time, he built him an actual damn motorcycle. Zoro painted the sidecar to look like a shark (okay technically Usopp did the painting and Zoro bitched about it but he loves it if anyone scratches that paint job they immediately find themselves with their blades in their face). He just lays there, sleeping, sometimes doing weights while letting Luffy drive a fucking motorcycle.

Love that Nami weighed up her choices and her and Robin decide to ride with Usopp. Let's face it, he is easily the most responsible rider. Well, that's why Nami choose him. Chopper has two designated seats: Usopp's basket and Zoro's lap. So of course Robin has to sit where she can see Chopper.

Also, LOOK HOW FUCKING CUTE CHOPPER IS IN A BASKET.

Brook seems to be riding a penny farthing which is pretty amazing. He probably just had one in his garage from his youth. Sanji has wisely decided to ride backwards bitchseat so that smoke doesn't fly back in his own face. I am unable to see what Franky is driving. I assume his bottom half turns into a motorcycle. I mean why not?

The Strawhat Gang does pretty much the exact same shit they do as Pirates. I mean, Luffy even falls into water just as often. How? It's Luffy that's how.

Law's little group of anarchist ride around in a yellow Volkswagen Beetle. Fight me.

Winter Wonder Island

IS THAT PENGUIN WEARING ZORO'S HARAMAKI? HOW DID HE GET IT? DIES ZORO KNOW? DID HE GIVE OT TO HIM? DID ZORO THINK THE PENGUIN'S BELLY MIGHT BE COLD?

I love Nami and Chopper playing, though Chopper looks less pleased. Plus the polar bear and Luffy are just the same person/bear. And nothing can convince me Robin isn't currently getting a back massage by a walrus. That is how my bitch roles.

The Straw Helmets

And we're back to the AUs.

Total honesty time: I picked this less put of love (though I enjoy most the AU ones) and more to annoy a friend.. See, I know many a Norwegian. They are a super nice country, you guys.

Who get super pissed at popular depictions of Vikings. Which are wrong.

And yet this particular reimagining is so wrong it's like gone full circle. I mean it's still nowhere near accurate but damn is it awesome. Are they riding walruses? Oda knows the Vikings had horses, right? And reindeer?

And yet he's gone with the well known domestic walrus. Huh. It's a choice.

Honestly, Franky and Usopp's costumes look more gladiator than Viking (also, I know you are a pervert Franky, but you literally gonna die of hypothermia.) Chopper is apparently one of those famous Japaness Vikings based on his costume design while Luffy is wearing something I can 100% imagine Doflamingo owned at some point. And Zoro....

Well, there is a reason I have a tag called Zoro's sense of direction and/or fashion. Look at that thing. That is a mess. I love it.

Get Wet

Nami, babe, me, Brook, Sanji, and apparently Robin a appreciate how sexy you're being right now.

But all I see is Zoro's damn fine back with water forming little riblets around his muscles. Also, love the boy's smile as he watches Luffy. He totally knows what's about to go down and thinks it's fucking hilarious.

They Call It The Grand Line

Every member of the coward trio (plus guest member Brook) is freaking the fuck out and I love it. Chopper and Nami are cling to one another, Brook's soul has left his body, and I'm pretty certain Usopp has half climbed into the seat in front of him to grab Zoro. Which I cannot blame him for.

Meanwhile, Robin is watching this whole spectacle with mild amusement, Sanji is straight up grilling... While on the back of a rollar coaster, Franky is chowing down on some of that food and Zoro... Zoro is getting drunk. On a rollar coaster.

The only one who seems to be having any fun is Luffy, sitting, of course, on his special seat. Look at that kid, he's having a blast. Well now we know how all the other Strawhats ended up here.

A Game Of Chicken

There's a lot I could say about this picture, but all I'm going to say is this: Zoro is clearly riding a weird ass chocobo.

What else can beat that?

Pirate Olympics: Where Everyone Is Winner Wanted Man

Oh, look, it's another AU one!

Look, over all, everyone has a sport that is either well suited to them (except maybe Brook. I mean soccer? Really? Not, like short distance sprinting since he's the fastest strawhat or fencing? If it were winter he could participate in the skeleton - yohohoho!).

Let's just amire Zoro playing baseball THREE BAT STYLE. LIke a goddamn boss.

You Know What's Awesome? Drugs.

It doesn't even matter what's going on in this one, it's goddamn beautiful.

Just Another Sunny Day

[You know when I said I haven't read the manga yet? Well, also terrible with visual images - the world should be in words in my opinion. So this, it turns out, is not a colorspread but fanart by the very talented Frayten who I deeply apologize to for not crediting earlier. I'm keeping it though, because it's amazing art, it's been reblogged and at least now it's properly credit on the main post. Many thanks to @blueriza to for being a better fan than I am.]

I really enjoy this little switch up. I want to believe it isn't just Law fucking with them but they've all inhaled some kind of mind switching pollen of something. So one day Law just came out to find Robin making breakfast and heart eyes at all the men, Sanji eating nothing but meet and bouncing around like he was made of rubber, Franky trying to play the violin, Chopper taling wild stories about when he was captain, Usopp training for a couple hours before passing out, Brook worrying over everyone's health, Nami striking posed while talking about how SUPER it all is, and Luffy, for once in his life, perfectly calm as he sits there reading.

That would be hilarious but, yeah, obviously it was Law. Look at how Nami Zoro is threatening him. She know exactly who pulled this shit. And look at Law's smug little smirk.

Hey, you suppose Law flirted with Nami Zoro? I know it's Nami but she's still got Zoro's abs and ass. Just throwing that out there.

[nayladoodles]

Dream is not okay

It's sad dreammare time y'all, buckle up!

My mind is a wonderful thing at 2am. It provided me with an idea that I'm very sure has been done.

WARNING: MENTION OF SELF HARM AND SUICIDAL THOUGHTS

Tea: Dream is actually insanely depressed due to literally no one from his au or the multiverse caring about him as a person. They only want to use his aura as a "one hit wonder drug" discarding him once they get what they want.

Blue and Ink are not guilt-free in this either even if they don't do it intentionally.

Dream has hobbies like painting, singing and reading (he likes sci-fi, macabre, poetry and, fantasy). He tries to share his talents with the villagers but No. One. Cares. He is a ray of sunshine. All they care about is getting their daily fix. Dream begins to realize that once people get what they want from his aura they'll leave him.

He hates it. He feels used and lonely. He at one point takes a black apple and feels the urge to take the happiness away from the ungrateful. If he can't be happy why should they? He snaps from these dark thoughts in tears realizing he can't takeaway happiness from nightmare who is the only one who deserves it in his opinion.

He carves a box and hides the apple in it. He also keeps a journal about his life.

When he discovers Nightmare is abused and bullied he is heartbroken. He also has no idea how to approach Nightmare without cornering him like his abusers. As a result dream feels horrible guilt and his depression worsens the more Night pulls away from him.

Desperation/monophobia triggers the 'fawn' trauma response causing Dream to do literally anything to keep others by his side even if it makes him uncomfortable.

At one point (though Nightmare doesn't remember this) he tells his brother "You are going to leave me too someday soon and I wouldn't blame you..."

Nightmare eats the apple a month later and Dream finds twisted satisfaction in Night dusting the villagers. Serves them right. Self loathing returns full force as he is turned to stone.

100 years is a long time to stew in regret and self depreciation.

By the time Dream escapes he's even worse than before but once he joins the stars he has little time for depression. Blue figures it out by observing Dream closely though he at first is the same as everyone else using Dream's aura as a pick me up on bad days.

Dream finds Nightmare again and so they fight Dream's fawn response still very much present to the point of accepting bodily harm if it means he has Night's undivided attention.

One X-Event later he has a new bodyguard and life continues as a fugitive. Ink left him like he expected and Blue was dusted by X-Gaster.

Over time Cross uses his aura to re-center himself and begins to lean toward joining Nightmare's group which again Dream expects.

The "betrayal" is nothing life shattering much to Nightmare's dismay. He captures Dream and imprisons him.

Dream's aura progressively balances out Nightmare's crew and castle which satisfies Dream in a weird way.

He does not attempt to escape after being caught the first time (which was just to save face... he didn't truthfully want to escape).

Nightmare rewards Dream's good behavior by removing the magic restraints he had on him. He expects Dream to try and run or summon his weapon but he does not confusing the hell out of Nightmare.

As a reward for not attempting to escape or trying to contact Ink Nightmare lets Dream explore the castle and one day finds him painting in one of the empty rooms. He never knew his brother was so good at it. (O o f). He watches Dream paint for awhile before noticing the line of red dripping down his arm from under the arm warmers Dream wears. It's definitely not paint.

More confusing still to the other guardian is the wave of negativity he felt from Dream after Cross joined him. The other swears he saw Dream's pained smile drop as the portal closed. These waves of negative energy continue to occur whenever he is around Dream. He figures it's his aura causing it but... N O P E.

The next time he finds Dream painting Cross is also there with Killer. They listen as Dream begins to sing as he paints. He has dark circles under his sockets that were not there the previous time Nightmare checked on him. As time progresses Dream begins to look worse for wear like he did when he first arrived in the hideout. 

8 months later Nightmare realizes that his aura has nothing to do with Dream’s worsening state and decides to confront him about the negativity he constantly feels coming from him. Cross suggests he waits for Dream in the room he was given after his 3rd month of being imprisoned without an attempt to escape (He had no reason to lock Dream in the dungeon after the first month but did so to put his crew at ease). 

He goes to Dream’s room but his twin is not there so he opts to wait for Dream to come back. While he waits he notices an open journal on the desk and a ornate box made from cherry wood. The journal has his old emblem on it and the bookmark is one he recognizes as one he gave to Dream before the “apple incident”. Seeing it warms his soul in a way knowing Dream kept it and uses it still. He notices that the marked section has his name in the beginning of the section and that the writing is faded from age. He knows he shouldn’t snoop in his twin’s personal affairs but he is desperate for answers. 

What he reads in the journal is over 300 years of deep self loathing and despair. most of which is centered around the fact that Dream knew about the bullying/abuse Nightmare went through daily and that he was unable to protect his twin. The pages are full of faded tear stains and darker stains that Nightmare is sure is blood. Dream’s deep felt self loathing and bleak outlook shocks Nightmare and he is VERY concerned about Dream’s mental health. 

He sets the journal back to rights reading the recent passages. More deep felt self loathing which is fueled by Dream developing romantic feelings toward his brother or more accurately having previously established feelings resurface. Dream feels like a sick freak for feeling this way about Nightmare and some words have been smudged by tearstains telling Nightmare that he was crying while writing these entries. 

Nightmare can’t help but be flustered slightly by Dream loving him romantically as he too began to feel more than brotherly affection toward Dream which is why he pushed him away scared Dream would hate him for it. It soothes his insecurity that Dream feels the same and he knows he needs to talk with Dream about it so they can both finally be on the same page. 

Another section of the journal is marked with the darker bookmark Nightmare gave him and the whole section radiates very strong negative emotions. Concerned Nightmare carefully flips to it and what he reads nearly makes his soul stop. Unlike the section about him and Dream's emotions regarding him this section is full of Dream’s darkest thoughts. He barely gets through four pages when he finds this

“No one would miss me...Everyone leaves me once they find their ‘happy place’. I...I just want to bite into it and let go but...I can’t...I can’t leave Nighty alone...not when he just properly reentered my life....I love him too much to....”

The rest is indecipherable due to the heavy tearstains all over the page. Nightmare feels his soul stop and his breaths become ragged as he stares at the small box on the desk. 

Dream doesn’t have one...right...? 

He wouldn’t actually consider...?

Nightmare’s soul pounds painfully in his chest.  A sound from outside the room startles him and he knocks the box off the desk causing it to fall open. Inside is a black apple. The world goes blurry around the edges as he panics his chest tightening as he stares with a blown wide eye at the damned fruit. He can’t breath and his ears are ringing as the attack worsens. His own brother...his beloved Dream was actually

c o n s i d e r i n g....?!

Dream returns to find his brother (and crush) having a severe panic attack on the floor as he stares at the apple in the box. He sighs closing it it up and redoing the latch before putting it back on the desk noticing the journal which causes him to panic not knowing what Nightmare read or how much. 

The movement startles Nightmare who turns on his sibling, “WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT?!” 

“Night I...” 

“WHY?!” Nightmare screams tears gushing from his eyes both visible due to shock and distress. 

“ I WANT TO EAT IT SO DAMN MUCH JUST TO FINALLY LET GO BUT I CAN’T TAKE THAT SMALL BIT OF HAPPY AWAY FROM YOU NIGHT! I... I can’t...no one needs me...or cares...” Dream breaks down in tears seeing Nightmare’s other socket . Nightmare pulls Dream close as they both cry. 

“You’re the only one who *hic* cared about me...who *hic* deserves my happy aura. I...I feel so damn used! All people want is a one hit wonder drug and then they leave! Ink...*hic* Cross... *hic* Blue...I can’t do it anymore! That’s why I don’t try to escape. What reason do I have to *hic* do that? What good will it do? No one would miss me if I ate it..” 

“I would miss you! Please don’t m-make the same mistake I did. P-please Dream!” Nightmare sobs as the tar drips off him revealing more and more of his passive form. “I love you so much! I’m s-sorry for pushing you away! I was terrified that the villagers would hurt you and...and of my f-feelings for you. I should have talked to you instead of hiding.” Night hugs Dream tight sniffling and crying into his brother’s shoulder. 

Cue the LONG OVERDUE discussion they both have needed to have for over 500 years to get closure and to figure out their feelings. Dream’s cutting habit is revealed which scares Nightmare even more and he pulls Dream into the bathroom to properly treat them. He tells Dream he has the same habit and has been struggling to overcome it. 

 They end up curled up on Dream’s bed cuddling under the blanket Dream knitted to replace the old one from their AU that fell apart from age. They decide to start dating but agree to take it slow. Their first kiss is soft and sweet. They fall asleep their souls feeling lighter than they had in years. 

Dreamtale belongs to jokublog

Cross jakei

Killer rahafwabas

[snowdice]

Road Trips and Missing Persons (Part 17)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Patton & Virgil, Virgil & Deceit, Logan & Patton, Emile & Remy, Roman & Remus & Janus

Characters: Patton, Virgil, Deceit, Remus, Roman, Logan, Emile, Remy

Summary: Patton was just getting groceries. The next thing he knew, there was a knife at his throat and he was an unwilling uber driver. Virgil’s on the run after the murder of his dad, and it’s not just his paranoia that’s telling him he’s being chased down. He has to get somewhere safe, somewhere he can trust, and all he has is a couple of stories from his dad and a name: “Green Bellow Foods and Dispensary.”

Notes: Secret Agents AU, knives, carjacking, kidnapping, murder mentioned, guns mentioned, pepper spray, blood mentioned, drugs mentioned, explosions, car crashes (more to be added)

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve affectionately named it the Goblin Brain Fic because it’s helping my brain actually get motivated for studying. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 My Master Post

“Aw, come on kiddo,” Patton beseeched doing his absolutely best not to laugh at the adorable discontent expression on Anxiety’s face.

“You murdered all of my cows,” the boy grumbled. “All of them!”

Patton did giggle then. “That’s the game.”

“You knew!” Anxiety insisted. “You knew the cemetery was there, didn’t you? You’re familiar with this highway. That’s why you let me take the 150 cows you cheater.”

Patton didn’t bother to deny it. “All’s fair,” he said instead.

“You’re the worst,” Anxiety shot back. “Why don’t we play a game I can win.”

“Like what?” Patton asked, curious.

“Like…” he said. “Like, let’s play a game where whoever’s youngest wins.”

Patton chuckled. “Well I guess you’ve got me beat there.”

“Or a contest to see who has the straightest hair.”

“Sounds like a fun game, but we’d have to wash both of our hair just to make sure neither of us are cheating and have product in.”

There was a pause and Patton glanced over at him.

“Aw!” he cooed. “Do you secretly have curly hair too?”

Anxiety groaned.

“That’s adorable!”

“Is not,” he grumbled, folding his arms over his chest. “It ruins my aesthetic.”

“Aw, stop being so grumpy, kiddo.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t be if you hadn’t murdered all of my cows.”

“I sure did kill the moo-d, huh?”

Anxiety groaned. “What did I do to deserve this?”

“…Carjac-”

“I know, I know,” Anxiety huffed. Patton smiled over at him and reached over to ruffle his hair. “Ugh, stop! No!”

“I want to see the curls!” Patton teased as Anxiety batted him away.

“You’re lucky I don’t have the god damned knife.”

“Excuse me, was that a bad word Mister?”

“Ugh,” Anxiety groaned.

“I will turn this car around,” Patton threatened.

“Oh, yeah,” Anxiety said. “That’s what would make you stop driving. Silly me. I’ll try not to use the grown-up words.”

“See that you don’t.” Anxiety just shook his head and turned the radio up a bit to ignore him.

“The cows have been cleared up,” Anxiety noted.

Patton hummed. “Do you want to get on the interstate again?” he asked. “It would be about 10 minutes faster and I’m sure if anyone was tracking us, we lost them in all of that.”

“Sure,” he agreed. “I don’t see why not.” Patton nodded and took the next turn back onto the familiar interstate.

“So,” Patton hedged once they were back on the main road. “We’ll be there soon. What are your plans once we get there? Nothing in particular,” he rushed to say when he saw the kid frowning. He was a secretive little thing. “Just, what do you want me to do?”

“Oh, um,” he said, playing with the edges of his hoodie sleeve. “I don’t know.” He paused. “You can leave if you want.”

A smile flickered across Patton’s face. Not likely kid. “Well, I’m not going to leave at least until I make sure you’re with someone.”

“Thanks,” Anxiety said softly.

“I’m with you all the way Anxiety.”

“I still don’t understand you at all.” Patton just shrugged and smiled. “Also, you can call me Vee.”

“Ooo a partial name,” Patton said. “I’m moving up in your esteem.”

“I didn’t say that,” Vee snapped back. “My name might be Bob for all you know.”

“Right,” Patton agreed. “Of course. Bob. My bad.”

That caused Vee to smile though he seemed to be fighting it. After a few moments, the smile faded, and he started playing with the strings on his hoodie. “You’ve got to get back to your family though, eventually,” he said.

Patton shrugged, not mentioning the fact that they were literally driving towards his brother this very second. “They’re all adults who can more than handle themselves. My brother’s older than me and the twins have him. You need me a bit more right now.”

Vee thought for a moment, still rubbing his fingers over the frayed edge of the hoodie string. “I have an older brother,” he offered.

“Oh?” Patton asked.

“I tried to call him earlier after my uncle,” Vee said. “He didn’t pick up.”

“Well, I’m sure there is a reasonable explanation for that, just like with your uncle.”

Vee bit his lip. “I don’t know if…” he said, “if he’d be on my side in this or not.”

“What do you mean?”

Vee looked away out the window. “Our mom’s the one who killed my dad,” he said quietly.

“Oh, honey,” Patton said softly. “I’m so sorry.”

“So, I don’t know if my brother would side with her or not. I don’t want to think he’d hand me over to her if I went to him, but…”

Poor kiddo, Patton thought. He wished he could say with certainty that his brother wouldn’t do something like that, but Patton didn’t know enough about him to know for certain. He hoped not. “I’ll help you figure it all out,” Patton promised. “I’ll make sure you don’t have to go with your mom.”

Vee snorted. “I don’t know what you can do, but thanks for the sentiment.”

“Oh,” Patton said. “I think I could do a thing or two.”

“Sorry,” Vee said dryly, “but your reaction to a carjacking was to get me ice cream.”

Patton laughed lightly. “Good point.

“I really don’t want to go with my mom, but I don’t think the cops would listen to me,” Vee said. “She’s technically my mom even though I’ve never even spent the night at her house. Does this make her my legal guardian now?”

“If she’s the one who killed your father, I doubt people would let you go with her.”

“You don’t know mom,” Vee mumbled. “I’m sure no one would even think to try to arrest her for that, let alone convict her. Would they let my uncle be my guardian even if she isn’t arrested?”

“They’d be willing to do that I’m sure. Especially since you’re already 15, anyone would listen to your opinion on where you live.” Vee look at least a bit relieved at that. “So, you like your uncle then?” Patton asked.

“He’s great,” Vee said. “He lived with us when I was really little. He always made me eat my vegetables and helps me out when I’m anxious. He’s a psychiatrist so he knows his stuff.”

“I have a friend whose brother is a psychiatrist,” Patton said. “I’ve never met him, but Logan sends people to him when they need mental health care. It’s a big help for a lot of them.”

“Yeah,” Vee agreed. “It wouldn’t be too bad living with him, I guess.”

 “Well I’ll make sure you end up with him and not your mom, okay?”

“Sure,” Vee replied.

Patton shot him a half smile and they continued driving for a few minutes before he exited the interstate. “We’re almost there” he told Vee.

Vee bit his lip. “I hope this wasn’t a stupid idea…” he said.

“Oh, I’m sure it’s fine,” Patton said. He flipped a switch on near his steering wheel that would open the gate for them a few seconds before said gate came into view. He drove up the driveway and chose to park in front of the ‘factory’ instead of trying to park in the underground parking garage which would certainly freak Vee out.

“Just looks like a creepy abandoned factory,” Vee commented, eyeing the old concrete building with its boarded over windows. “It’s almost too perfectly abandoned,” he said, eyes narrowed. Smart boy.

“Ready?” Patton asked.

Vee still looked nervous, but he nodded determinedly after a moment and exited the car. Patton followed him. He let Vee lead the way up the gravel path to the entrance of the building. He studied the door for a couple of minutes and then pushed it slowly open. Patton was sure at this point that someone downstairs had probably noticed them and would come up to greet them soon.

Vee was looking around himself with suspicious eyes. “Okay,” he said. “What do we do now?”

“Probably just wait to see if anyone comes to meet us,” Patton said.

Vee started poking around a bit. “It’s pretty clean for an abandoned factory,” he said.

“Mmhmm,” Patton replied.

He considered a couple of panels near the door and Patton observed him, curious about what he’d do. He made a startled noise when one of the panels came off. “Oops,” he said. He peered into the hole he’d just made. “Well… that’s not good. Whoever put that camera there is probably not going to be happy with me.”

Patton had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. The person who put that camera there would not.

Vee set the broken panel back against the wall. It hung off of it awkwardly. “At least we know there really is someone here and it’s not just an abandoned factory.”

“That is good,” Patton agreed. Just then there was a soft ding which Patton identified as the hidden elevator the room over.

Vee’s head shot up to look in the direction of the sound, and the boy shuffled closer to Patton.

Logan himself rounded the corner after a moment and looked over at them with his lips pursed and looking especially cross. “How is it,” he asked, “that you always do exactly what I need you to do in the most irritating and inconvenient way possible?”

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 18

[skiller0dani]

Cherry Pie (1) | Billy Mitman

M A S T E R L I S T

smut | slow burn  requests info wanna be on a Timmy taglist? click here

surprise I wrote a Billy short series! For this however I’m not using Y/N, I have an actual OC name picked out for this character. I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. 

lemme also clear some stuff up YES this is a teacher/student relationship story NO there are no adult/under-aged person relationships  YES I made Billy 18 in this story, because lets say he’s in his final semester of senior year.  NO smut will not be in every chapter of this short story. It’s a SLOW BURN. meaning I will be adding sexual tension to every chapter to build up the anticipation for when it finally happens. 

| Upon realizing her emotional and mental health was in desperate need of assistance, Miss Rachel Stevens had requested a week off in order to address these issues with a professional. To sub her senior English Class is Miss. Alice Perribow, the resident Art teacher at Valley High School. | 

***

MONDAY

Alice Perribow was what you’d imagine as a well put together woman. Smart, well dressed, on time, prepared, as a teacher she was the definition of responsible. This was simply to mask the fact that her entire life was falling apart, going through a messy divorce and property battle over her perfect house with her soon to be ex husband was causing some outside stress. Alice never brought home stress to work, she allowed herself to indulge in the happiness her job gave her, even for 8 hours a day. So when Rachel Stevens came knocking on Alice’s office door after hours and pleaded her to sub- Alice was hesitant to say yes but agreed anyway. She always has had an inability to say no to people who have shown her nothing but kindness, and Rachel was very kind. Alice’s hair was messier than it normally would have been this Monday morning, she had been running late due to a mistimed alarm. Her brunette hair was thrown up in a messy bun and her short heels clicked down the hallway as she rushed to Rachel’s classroom. The only way Alice could make this work was by subbing in the afternoon, the librarian Mr. Fredricks subbed the morning classes. Alice also had to teach Art in the morning, but didn’t have classes in the afternoon, usually just private lessons with students. 

Alice was quite pleased to see no students waiting in the classroom when she pushed in, and unceremoniously dropped her things onto the desk sending a binder of papers crashing to the ground. “Shit,” Alice mumbled to herself as she crouched down to gather the papers. Suddenly a pair of dark tennis shoes joined her as someone crouched to help her pick up the papers. When Alice looked up, her throat closed only slightly upon looking into the greenest eyes she’s ever seen. A pair of green eyes that belonged to Billy Mitman, “thank you Billy.” Alice smiled, taking the papers from him as she stands. She’d seen Billy around the hallways before, and he’d also been by her office a few times for piano lessons. “Of course Miss Perribow.” He says, flashing her a smile before turning down the row of chairs to his desk. His eyes stayed on her and he only wondered where Miss Stevens was for a fleeting moment before his focus returned to Miss Perribow. She was beautiful, her dark hair framed her face perfectly and her eyes were so bright as she turned to the whiteboard. Miss Perribow was a bit curvier than Miss Stevens, and Billy couldn’t take his eyes off the way those jeans hugged her hips. Billy knows it’s wrong for him to be thinking of his teachers this way, but girls his own age don’t interest him. 

She so gracefully wrote her name out on the whiteboard as more students trickled in. Margot came in and beamed when she saw Miss Perribow, “good afternoon Miss Perribow!” She exclaimed and Alice turned with a smile on her face. Alice already knew Margot fairly well, she had taken Alice’s Art class every single year of her high school career. “Margot, so good to see you.” Alice said, a dimple popping out on her left cheek. Billy smiles fondly at the small dimple in her cheek. Soon the first bell was ringing and Alice closed the door before turning to address the class, “I’m sure a lot of you already know me but in case you don’t- I’m Miss Perribow. I’m going to be the afternoon sub for Miss Stevens this week.” She smiled and Billy noticed two boys adjacent to his left sharing a look before turning their horny gaze back towards Alice. “So from what I understand is that you were about to start the Canterbury Tales yeah?” She asks for clarification, and Margot nodded happily. Alice smiles warmly at Margot before pulling a copy of the book, “what would you say the overall theme of this tale is?” She asks and the entire room falls into silence. Margot glances around before raising her hand, “it’s clearly about courtly love. These two men, once family nearly beat each other to death to prove they deserve her affections. In my opinion, it’s a tale of how poisoning love can be.” 

One of the boys to Billy’s left snickers, “did we read the same thing? Because I’m pretty sure one of them got sick from a gnarly case of blue balls.” He says with a smirk, and most of the class erupts in laughter. He’s a big guy, definitely a football player and built like a tank. In fact if Billy recalls correctly, that’s what most people call him: Tank, even though his real name is Leon. He leans forward on his desk, eyeing Alice. “Do you know what that is Miss Perribow?” Tank smiles slyly and Billy feels annoyance bubbling in his chest. Alice manages a small smile as she turns her attention towards Tank, “you know Leon, I think it would be a much better idea to return to the Knights Tale.” Alice dismisses but Tank turns to his friends and smirks before clearing his throat loudly. “It’s when a girl gets a guys engine revving, and he pops a hard one, but then she doesn’t do anything about it. She just leaves him there with blue balls. Get it? Cause they’re sad.” Tank raises an eyebrow as Alice turns to look back at him. She smiles warmly, doing her best to keep her frustration at bay as she strolls down the row towards Tank’s desk. She leans over on Tank’s desk, placing her palms flat on the surface of the desk. “Tank, it seems you have forgotten that I know your mother personally. Shall I give her a call and inform her that you thought it would be appropriate to educate the class on sex ed today?” She asks, her tone serious while Tank’s cheeks turn scarlet.

The class giggles quietly as Tank sinks back into his desk, but when Alice turns Tank whips his phone out and snaps a photo of her ass. “Delete that.” Billy snaps loudly, drawing Tank’s attention as well as everyone else in the room. Alice turns, her eyebrows furrowed as Tank and Billy are locked in a deep glaring match. “What the hell are you talking about freak?” Tank snaps and Billy takes a deep breath through his nose as Alice makes her way back down the row of desks. “I saw you take a picture of Miss Perribow, and I know you didn’t take it because you really like her jeans.” Billy snaps and Alice’s eyebrows raise as she turns towards Tank. Tank’s cheeks are red, but not with embarrassment- this time it’s with anger. “Leon, please see me after class. Billy, you too.” Alice says, looking over the both of them before returning to the lesson. Billy keeps his eyes on Tank for the remainder of class, and he hates when he sees Tank shamelessly look down Alice’s shirt. When the bell rings, neither of the boys move as Alice walks towards them and sits in the desk in front of Billy. Their eyes meet and Alice quickly looks away when she feels the tingles shoot through her body. “Somebody want to tell me what’s going on here?” She asks, looking between the boys. 

“Yeah Tank is a pervert and took a picture of your ass.” Billy snaps, his voice tense as he glares over at Tank. Alice’s cheeks flush as she averts her eyes to Tank, “is that true?” She asks and Tank rolls his eyes. “Which part? Because no I’m not a pervert, I’m a lover baby. Did I take a picture of your ass? Hell yeah, I’ll need some jack off material for later.” Tank snickers, simply enjoying the rise he gets out Billy with every word out of his mouth. Billy pushes up from his desk angrily, and Tank stands too. The two of them are chest to chest and they stand eye to eye, although Billy is the same height as Tank- he’s not nearly as muscular. Alice stands, and when Tank’s eyes avert to her Billy immediately steps in front of her. “Boys, you both need to calm down. I think this conversation should be continued in Mr. Alvarez’s office.” Alice says, trying to move between the boys but Billy won’t let her get anywhere near Tank. “I’d happily bend you over his desk if that’s what you mean.” Tank smiles and Billy is lurching forward before Alice arms curl around him to hold him back. “Tank you need to leave,” Alice snaps and he shrugs as he casually walks out of the classroom. The bell rings again, signaling the end of the school day as Billy stands in the classroom- his chest heaving. 

“Billy, you know he was saying that just to make you angry right?” Alice says gently, and he shrugs as he reaches for his bag. Billy begins to head for the door when Alice’s left hand catches his eye, “Miss Perribow, aren’t you married?” He asks, stopping when he notices her lack of wedding ring. Alice is surprised to say the least, she didn’t imagine any of her students paid that much attention. “We’re um- separated.” Alice explains awkwardly and Billy nods as his eyes stay fixed on her. Alice’s cheeks heat up under Billy’s gaze and she takes a deep breath to control her emotions. She’s just lonely without Ben that’s all, she’s projecting her feelings of loneliness on a handsome student. He’s a teenager, and she needs to get herself together. “What happened?” He asked and what scared Alice the most about Billy’s question, was how genuinely he asked her. The look on his face makes her think he genuinely cares, but she knows about Billy. Rachel gave her a bit of a warning on Billy’s own issues with projecting his feelings on others. He doesn’t really care, he’s just projecting. “Sometimes things just don’t work out.” Alice smiles through the breaking of her heart. She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear, ignoring the look that Billy is giving her. A look that says he isn’t buying her bullshit line. 

“Was he a douchebag or something?” Billy asks, sitting back against a front row desk as Alice begins to pack up her things into her bag. “Billy, language.” Alice scolds gently, ignoring the cheeky smile on Billy’s face when he notices her flushed cheeks. “He did something didn’t he?” Billy says, and Alice gives him another look before sighing deeply and running a hand down her face. “Yes he did, and I don’t really want to talk about it.” Alice says and Billy nods instantly, a small smile pulling at the corners of his lips. Alice turns to her book and begins to look over the lesson for tomorrow as Billy makes his way out of the classroom, and he nearly says something he shouldn’t but he bites his tongue. Alice spends at least another hour sitting at that desk, writing out the lesson for tomorrow. In the back of her mind her thoughts drift back to Billy, he’s charming and sweet in a boyish way. He’s smart, and he thinks deep thoughts- Rachel says he thinks quite philosophically. Tank however is becoming a problem that deeply concerns Alice, he’s much taller and much stronger than she is. The next morning she’ll have to talk to Mr. Alvarez about him. 

The sun is setting when Alice makes her way towards the parking lot but out of the corner of her eye she sees a figure leaning against the school. Turning her head, her cheeks warm when she sees Billy leaning against the brick wall with a cigarette in his mouth. “Billy?” She calls, and he glances her way with a smile on his face. Alice hugs her bag to her chest as she makes her way towards Billy, “what are you still doing here?” She asks him and Billy shrugs, taking another drag from his cigarette. He rests his head back, his signature blue hoodie loosely hanging around his shoulders. “Skipped the bus.” He says with a smile as he blows smoke out. He turns his gaze to hers and he cocks an eyebrow when he notices her cheeks warm. Alice steps back, “why?” She asks him, and he chuckles as he drops his cigarette butt to the ground before putting it out with his shoe. Billy pushes off the wall and steps towards Alice, and her breath catches in her throat. “I wanted to see you Miss Perribow,” Billy breathes and Alice feels a shiver run down her back. This is a student. Alice steps back further, trying to distance herself from Billy. “Billy that’s- that’s not appropriate. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Alice says, her voice rushed as she turns towards her car. 

“I don’t have a ride, so I hope you’re comfortable leaving a student alone at night with no way to get home. Guess I’ll have to walk.” Billy says, his voice lilted mischievously. Alice halts, her back still facing him. As a teacher, she can’t leave him here alone. “I’ll give you a ride, this once.” Alice says and Billy smirks as he lifts his bag over his shoulder before falling into step next to Alice. “It’ll be our little secret Miss Perribow.” He says with a wink and Alice simply slides into the driver seat of her car. The silence in the car is a tad bit uncomfortable as Alice pulls the car out of the parking lot, and heads towards Billy’s house. “Is Perribow your maiden name?” Billy asks suddenly, the street lamps illuminating his face as the car passes underneath them. Alice bites at her bottom lip as she turns the corner, “yeah it is.” She says and Billy nods with a soft hum. Alice dreads heading back home, Ben is probably there and she doesn’t feel like facing him at this moment. “What did he do? Your ex-husband?” Billy asks, his voice soft as he looks over at her with gentle eyes. Alice feels a rush of emotion sneak up on her, god this is so unprofessional. She keeps her eyes on the road as she softly sniffles, “he cheated on me.” Billy is quiet, but Alice knows his eyes are on her. 

When the tears come, Alice feels beyond embarrassed and refuses to look at Billy. “Pull over.” He says, and Alice pulls in front of a house putting the car in park. She wipes her eyes as she turns to look at him, “is this your house?” She asks, trying to divert the attention from her misty eyes. Billy turns in his seat to look at her, one of his hands coming to hold hers. “No, but you shouldn’t be alone right now.” He says and Alice pulls her hand from his while quickly shaking her head. Alice takes a deep breath before turning to look at him, “Billy no I need to get you home, your parents are worried sick I’m sure.” She argues, it’s time to be the responsible adult. Billy stubbornly shakes is head, “nope told them I was hanging with Sam and wouldn’t be home until late. Look if you don’t want me here I’ll get out and just hang out until later-” Billy starts, turning to get out of the car but Alice places a hand on his arm to stop him. “Just tell me where you live-” She asks but Billy opens the door and exits the car. With a heavy sigh Alice exits her car after him, “Billy! It’s not safe for you alone.” She tries to reason but he just keeps walking. Feeling panic and worry for his well being Alice calls out after him once more. 

“Okay you’re right! I don’t want to be alone, but you are a student. An underaged student. I’m breaking a law just being with you now after hours.” Billy stops, and then turns to look at her. Their eyes lock as he makes his way back towards her, “I’m old enough to know what I want. I want to help you tonight.” Billy argues but Alice waves her hands. Why does she have to be so drawn to him? “You’re 17 Billy.” She protests and Billy laughs bitterly. “I’m turning 18 tomorrow. I’m practically an adult already.” He says, and she knows she won’t change his mind- it’ll be dangerous for him to wander around at night alone. “Billy-” She starts but Billy cuts her off, “Alice.” Her words die in her throat as she shivers upon hearing her name roll off Billy’s tongue. Alice stands silent, her eyes fluttering as she looks at Billy and finally she enters her car. Billy slides into the passenger seat, “I’m hungry for ice cream. I have money.” He says and Alice feels reluctant and anxious as she hesitantly starts the engine of her car. She takes off towards the nearest ice cream shop, ignoring how her heart races in his presence. Alice is aware of Billy’s behavioral issues, and she’s not sure if he’s currently on his medication or not. 

Once they’d gotten ice cream and parked in an empty parking lot, Billy turned to Alice again. “Who did he cheat on you with?” He asks and Alice has no idea why he is so interested in her failed marriage, but it is kind of nice to talk to someone about it. “His secretary. Screwed her at work, came home to me.” Alice laughed bitterly, not even worrying about being professional anymore. Clearly it doesn’t matter to Billy whether or not she’s his teacher, he’s determined to break down her walls. “He sounds like a dick.” Billy says and the simplicity of his comment, despite how complicated their situation is makes Alice laugh softly. Alice spoons more ice cream into her mouth, “yeah he is a dick.” She agrees and Billy smiles next to her. Alice turns to look at Billy, admiring his side profile for a moment longer then she should. “Billy, why don’t you hang out with people your age? Instead you spent time with Miss Stevens, and now me.” She asks and Billy pauses, as though he’s searching for the right words. “Because you’re smart, beautiful, experienced. You’re a real person, not just some high school kid caught up in shit that doesn’t actually matter.” He says, his eyes locking on hers once again. Before Alice can even move Billy is leaning over the center console and pressing his lips to hers. Alice freezes for a moment before melting against him, her lips moving with his for a fraction of a second before her mind once again returns to clarity. 

Alice yanks away from him, panic pounding in her chest. “You’re 17, and I’m your teacher what the hell am I doing?” Alice panics, her hands fumbling to start the car. Billy tries to reach for her hand, but she won’t even touch him. “Alice it’s okay, I know what I want-” He starts but Alice vigorously shakes her head, her hands digging into her hair as she drops her head to the steering wheel. Billy reaches out for her once more, “Alice you didn’t do anything wrong. I wanted that.” He reassures her with a hand rubbing down her back but Alice snaps up and gently pushes his hand off her- despite the fact that he was actually calming her down. “My name is Miss Perribow, and you need to tell me where you live William.” She says sternly, her eyes focused straight ahead. Billy leans back in his seat, mumbling his address and she takes off. Alice’s hands are trembling as she drives quickly, and she hates how her lips are still tingling from the slight contact with his. This is wrong. How she’s feeling is wrong. “Alice, I know you wanted it. I felt you lean into me, and you can deny it all you want but I felt the spark. I know you felt it too.” Billy snaps once they arrive at his house, slamming the car door once he exits. 

Alice exhales a shaky breath once his front door is closed and she drives down to her house, which funnily enough isn’t far from Billy’s house. When the garage closes behind her, she drags herself into the house and sure enough Ben is sitting at the kitchen counter. “Where have you been? I’ve been so worried baby,” He says, his voice soft with concern as he stands to approach her. Alice waves him off, feeling bile rising in her throat when he calls her baby. “Ben please don’t.” She sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose with her pointer and thumb as she kicks her shoes off. “Don’t call me that. You know we’re divorcing.” She says, her voice tired and he doesn’t push her. He watches her trudge up the stairs, but something about her seems off tonight. Like her mind is elsewhere. As Alice pulls herself into bed, she can’t get a certain pair of green eyes out of her head. She can’t forget the feeling of his lips on hers, and she knows the rest of this week is going to be more difficult than she’d anticipated. 

***taglist*** @irishbish​ @90sthemedsunsets​ @newletas​ @londonmademedoit​ @80sangelics​

[waokevale]

Porcelain Face - Chapter 2

[One year ago]

 Logan has finally graduated from collage and started his new job as a teacher at the local high school.

Similar to the students teachers were also introduced by the principal, but more formal.

The principal has showed him his new class meanwhile also telling him about the car accident the previous teacher had as Logan tried to make a pitiful expression on his face.

It was hard, since most of your life you lacked emotions like some heartless robot.

After that he perceived to talk to them as he examined all of their faces. Nothing has surprised him until he saw a boy with an interesting "face" or more exactly a paper material mask that could somehow change it's expression, which was also a little burned and scratched either meaning the boy has probably gone through a lot or he just had a worn off mask on his face.

The students all looked differently at him

Some were excited, some were curious, some bored or unimpressed and others....Ugh...let's just say their face wanted to do the illegal things from the movies that Logan despised yet had a contact with them somehow.

Mostly girls...The dressed up ones specifically.

The mysterious cardboard boy though had especially different expression than everybody else, at least his mask showed a different one.

It was somewhat of  fear and anxiousness, like Logan was some sort of a threat to him.

He could as well examine what is wrong later as he was told by the principal to start his lesson or at least hear what the students wanted to say about themselves...

And so they did. 

Most of them were stereotypical.

Popular girls, mean kids, intelligent one's that lacked sleep, (that Logan could tell because of the bags under their eyes) or so called nerds, gaming kids who too lacked sleep, loners and theatre kids. 

Nothing much changed in these 5 years that had passed since he attended high school.

It was rather disappointing for him to say.

Then again...It finally came to the cardboard kid.

He wasn't like most of them, some of them were very confident while they were  talking, some were bored and some stuttered a bit but managed to say what they intended to.

This kid was quiet. it was clear, that he tried to form words behind his mask but wasn't able to until someone else has spoken.

-"He's just a quiet freak, that's what he is!" Some kid laughed.

The boy in the mask was getting even more nervous from the unnecessary attention and the laughter from the other kids.

-"That's enough!" - Logan yelled emotionlessly as the class that was giggling went silent.

-"Listen to me James, it was clearly not funny for either me or the boy, I'm wondering how would you feel at his place.

But I hope you learn one thing from this lesson, no one should care about your idiotic opinions, might as well keep them to yourself, won't you?" Logan kept talking with a dead look on his face and voice that could be described as Arctic cold yet venomous like a viper.

The kid that was very confident before now fearfully flinched in his chair as he did not expect that from the new teacher.

After Logan's own monologue he sat back on his chair and counted to five. He perfectly calculated the time as when he said five the bell rang and everyone run out of the class, except the cardboard boy, who walked sloppily and shakily.

-"Would you mind staying a little longer in the classroom?" - Logan said as the short boy in hoodie flinched but nodded slowly in defeat.

-"Sit down here, please." - The man in the glasses and the tie motioned to the nearest chair from his desk as the boy listened to his command and sat there, still very anxious as ever.

-"Do you know why I have told you to stay here?" Logan asked calmly yet that didn't help the boy as he kept shaking.

-"...n-n-n-no." - He barely mumbled his reply.

His voice was weak and shaky, it wasn't much of a surprise for Logan though.

-"Do not worry, kid. I do not intend harm upon you or anything of that matter. I just want to communicate with you for a bit, since the break has already began."

The boy nodded getting a little better from the answer.

-"First, If it wouldn't be a problem I would like to hear your name. Mind sharing it with me?Do to the fact I do not wish to call you a "kid" unless you want me to."

-"V-V-Virgil..." The cardboard boy replied.

-"I'm glad you have shared this information with me, Virgil." - Logan tried smiling but it looked more like he made a derp face which made Virgil chuckle, but he suddenly realised his "mistake" and apologized.

-"What are you apologizing me for?" - Logan asked.

-"F-f-for l-laughing....I-I-I shouldn't, I-" the kid broke down in his chair.

Logan didn't know exactly what to do, but he knew that in these situations you usually go to the person and try to comfort them as he came closer to the boy and put his hand on Virgil's shoulder.

-"Virgil, that is untrue, I'm not sure if you've known that laughing is actually healthy for your organism? As well as the hormone endorphins that represents your happiness, if you've studied it on biology. Happiness is very important for your mental health. If you experience lack of happiness it can cause mental illnesses which are not good for your body.

Besides you didn't intend to laugh at me for no reason at all. I myself fail at emotions and I'm incredibly sorry for not helping at all."

-"It's O-ok Mr.Be-" But Virgil's sentence was cut off by Logan saying:

-"Though I like my surname I do not wish for you to call me by it. 

Just call me Logan when it comes to conversations like this one. I don't want to feel like someone who can't exactly be trusted by you, besides I'm only six years older than you. 

 I Intend to be your friend not foe." Logan blankly explained.

-"Y-you won't like m-me Mr-Logan, I'm v-very sorry."

-"It's okay, Virgil. You are a very nice kid so I see no reason for me not to like you." The man in glasses encouraged.

-"B-but m-my mask...." Virgil stuttered getting nervous yet again.

-"What's wrong with it? Despite it having burned marks and scratches of course." - 

-"-Aren't you f-forcing me to take it off? M-many of the other teachers tried, but I always said n-no, a-a-and...t-they a-always sent m-me to d-detentions f-for t-t-that... - the boy said while softly sobbing.

As we've already seen Virgil was a very fragile kid back then, it was very easy for him to break down.

Logan looked rather shocked and disappointed if you could actually read his expression.

-"I've read the school rules 3 times and there was nothing about not being able to wear masks or any other items even do to important means of course. Since you are clearly not wearing this for show I do not understand why would they do such things."

-"B-b-because t-they h-hate m-me.

E-e-everybody does....." Virgil finally cried covering his cardboard face in his hands.

To his and Logan's own surprise he has embraced the younger boy with a hug.

Virgil was frozen at first, but he slowly melted into the hug.

After a minute or so Logan has finally pulled away as he couldn't hear sobs no more.

-"Are you feeling better Virgil? Or should I call someone"

-"No-no-no! It's fine, I'm fine! .....Thank you so much M-Logan...I'm sure you'll dislike me one day anyways, but I-I'm glad that at least for now you sort of accept m-me."

-"Do not assume Virgil. You are a likeable, good person. Your mask or what's under it does not define you. Just please, at least try to understand it." Logan said.

The boy nodded unsurely as the bell rang for another lesson to start.

Virgil has already run back to his seat getting anxious again and fearing what would the person who usually sat there do to him.

Logan sighed sadly as he got out of the classroom, since Virgil and the others had a lesson with a different teacher this time.

He headed back to the teacher's room  mumbling to himself.

-"Some changes must be made...."

_________________________________

Logan's mom/big bro mode has activated! I hope you like the chapter.

:V