#he baffles me but we have no info on him whatsoever

[llolian]

the lack of arcana twilight content is making me focus on narrative crumbs because there are so many unanswered questions and I am a whore for history and lore. to those who have any theories out there, feel free to share as food for thought!

first off, the questions Sirius fed us:

Why is Bound Arlyn governed by constellations?

Why do the sorcerers pledge allegiance to them?

Why do monsters keep trying to invade this dimension?

but wait, those are only the big three. Looking into the finer details, there are more mysteries.

What is the universe trying to correct?

What exactly is the untold legacy of Bound Arlyn's Towers?

Is the Great Sorcerer Polaris still alive?

Was/Is Polaris as noble and heroic as others make him out to be?

Who is Debris?

What connection does our Shepard, Arcturus, have with the Void Cult's leader, “The Shepard” ?

Who is Sirius?

Is he the 1st Sorcerer of Canis Major? The Traitor of Bound Arlyn? An obviously pivotal character who knows more that he tells? A bastard? A hottie?

And of course, where do we fit in the grand scheme of things? What role does the Summoner play in this story? Where did our summoning abilities come from? Who are we?

I've always found it strange than our mascot is a bear, and our icon is Ursa Minor – which is Polaris's constellation. Add in the fact that we already have imprints of the main cast when this is seemingly the first time we've met.

Here's a bonus question that in my opinion, is the most crucial and curious one.

What was the promise, the contract that we made?

[merrysithmas]

I know this won’t happen cause Disney are morons but if the mandalorian connects to the eu din would meet fenn shysa kinda awkward as he’s the mandalor. At the time but I feel like he would be so sweet to him as many Mando haven’t been around each other since the empire took over

Oh and din meeting kal skirara ahhhhh he would be such a good mentor to din and all his force sensitive mandos helping Grogu ahhhhh

if ONLY they wouldve have included other Mandalorians and the actual Mandalorian culture as they claimed they would!

Things the show hasn't even touched on lmao:

-what The Way actually is. We have no idea after 3 season. Following the way of the Mand'alor/Mandalore? Which Mand'alor? Why?

-what the tenants of the Way are. We know none except don't remove helmet (apparently that's fine now tho lmao) and "one does not speak unless one knows". Kay.

-why Children of the Watch feel keeping their helmets on more ardently supports Mandalorian faith. A reason has never been given.

-Anything about Mandalorian armor other than it is made of beskar. No info on pieces of it, styles, what the paint symbolizes, or clan colors.

-the entire language of Mando'a. This one is the most baffling to me, esp in the CotW which I'd assume would be the tribe most stringent with speaking it.

-the Resol'nare. The Sacred Six Rules of being Mandalorian. The basis of Mandalorian culture. One of which is the vow to "speak the language" every day.

-Any other actual clan (all we have is what I guess is the ragtag Children of the Watch & Bo Katan's nameless followers).

-ANY other named Mandalorians (Din, Paz, Bo Katan, Axe, Koska). One of which is dead. Why do none of them have names?

-Din SPEAKING to anyone in his covert (he hasnt done that in three seasons). What. The. F.

-Grogu learning about Tarre Vizsla (seems like maybe that might be important)

-Discussion about Satine, the New Mandalorians, Pre Vizsla, The Death Watch (they cant touch that because Unproblematic Disney Terrorist Princess Bo will look bad)

-Anything else about the previous Mand'alors, their history, their planets.

-Any focus whatsoever on their opposition to the Jedi. Again, seems like that might have mattered. No mentions of Darth Maul and how the Mandalorians do not see a difference between the Jedi and the Sith.

-No mentions whatsoever of what Din's people think of the Force. Kay.

-Sabine Wren and Clan Wren. Why not ignore that too!

Basically Season 3 failed in every possible way before even TOUCHING on what they could have brought in from the EU.

This show... whatever we hoped for, we got the literal opposite.

Learning this through Din and Grogu was cool because they ALSO knew nothing about traditional Mando culture, being outsiders and offshoots and GROGU BEING A LITERAL CHILD. PERFECT OPPORTUNITY FOR DIN AND OTHERS TO TEACH HIM/US. But they ignored that.

They'll prob give that to Katan too.

[juniorgman187]

Love & Other Drugs (Spencer Reid Imagine) Part 1

*not my gif

Summary: Toxicologist Reader meets her match in the ever intriguing Doctor Reid. Category: Fluff Couple: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid Content Warning: drug addiction, love addiction, neglect Word Count: 4.1k

This is going to be a two-part series. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

Love is an addiction.

Not only is there behavioral evidence that suggests love can be addictive, but thanks to recent studies, we also have neurochemical and neuroimaging evidence to support the theory. Multiple feel-good chemicals are released when we are in love. These include dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin.

The roots of love addiction extend back to early childhood. A history of abandonment, neglect, or inadequate/ inconsistent nurturing can lead to a love addiction. Like other addictions, a love addiction is often the result of insecure attachment patterns.

It may sound strange to equate love with addiction. After all, love is perhaps the most positive of emotions; it results in many health benefits and has life-lengthening effects. It may only be, then, that a dysfunctional relationship to love is necessary in order to consider a person "addicted."

Love is like a drug and we don't care about the long term side effects; we just care about how high we can get.

So with that being said . . . how high could I get?

A question that I would soon find the answer to following a visit from the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit. 

“I’m Agent Hotchner. We spoke on the phone briefly.” 

The dark-haired man with the gentle eyes and dimples greeted. I recognized his voice, despite it being deeper in person. No complaints, though.

“So what was it you needed a toxicology report on?” 

Fully expecting the same gentleman to respond, a younger man behind him cut into the conversation, answering for the agent.

“This cloth,” He dangled the evidence bag in front of my face and practically let it drop when I took it from him, rather than making sure the bag landed safely in my hands like he should’ve given the fact that this was something vital to their case. So valuable, even, they requested to have the results expedited. 

“I suspect it’s chloroform, but they said we should bring it to a professional to be sure.” He finished his statement by pursing his lips into a thin, straight line, which oddly enough, I think was his version of a smile, and a not very agreeable one at that. 

Simply by the way he handed me the evidence bag and the tone of his voice as he said, “professional,” like the word stung his tongue and tasted like acid, I knew he was offended that he wasn’t deemed fit to analyze the chemical on the cloth. He surely thought of himself in the highest regard and to ask for help from someone else, much less a woman, was insulting to him. I was certain that he wasn’t doing this out of his own will, but that his superior most likely assured him it was just a precaution so as not to bruise that fragile ego. I had a feeling the only person he would listen to was a male superior, most likely from the absence of a proper one. A father. 

I could be a profiler, too, you know?

“Great. I’ll let you know what I find when I’m done.” 

“I’ll come with you.” 

I should’ve anticipated he’d have the audacity to invite himself as if this was a social gathering of some sort, which it was most certainly not. If anything, it was degrading to me that he insisted he come. Like he didn’t trust me to be on my own, like he was doubting my intelligence. I didn’t need a babysitter, chaperone, or supervisor, and I was going to make sure he knew that. 

“What’s your name again?” I asked, merely as a subliminal reminder that if he had said his name, I forgot it within seconds because he was that forgettable. 

“Dr. Spencer Reid.”

He didn’t ask for my name in return, and I had to ponder if it was his way of saying that he just didn’t care. How classy of him. 

Two can play that game. 

When he stepped foot into my beloved lab, or my lair as I liked to call it, I could feel the environment being tainted with his passive-aggressiveness, and I almost wanted to push him right back out the door so the dark cloud in the room would leave with him, but I settled for a kinder approach, politely asking if he could wear the appropriate protective gear if he insisted being so close to the chemical - the chemical I was to inspect. Again, the chemical I was to inspect - me. Not him - me. 

“No, it’s alright. I’ll just be right here.” 

I suppose his refusal to abide by my simple precaution of wearing a coat, goggles, and gloves was made up for by his promise to maintain a distance away from me, so I didn’t push the topic any further out of fear that he might change his mind and come closer and meddle with my space. I had my own personal bubble around me and I would go feral if he invaded it, whether it was knowingly or unknowingly. 

We’d spent probably two hours or so there in silence, which I quite liked, but I couldn’t help but notice how often he’d excuse himself to leave for the bathroom. I let it slide since I was too busy with my toxicology report anyway, and why would I complain about those few extra minutes of peace I got when he was away?

“This is so old fashioned,” I said in sheer awe as I inspected the small square of fabric that had clearly been doused with a euphoriant. “I haven’t seen this being used as a sedative since like the 1920s in those soundless black and white movies.” 

I was too engaged with the findings of my microscope to pay attention to the “info-dump” that was brewing from the lanky doctor so it came as a shock to me when all that I had said in light of the situation would be refuted with facts. 

“Actually, Chloroform was a popular anesthetic from the mid-1800s to around 1900, mostly around the time of the Civil War - not the 1920s.” 

I pulled my eye away from the lens of the microscope to inspect the speaking specimen. He looked quite proud of himself for knowing and saying what he did, and for that, I was almost perturbed all the more by his bravado, but given his physical stature, I suppose the skill of his brain was how he compensated for what he lacked in appearance, so I let it pass to boost his ego. 

“Yeah, I was never really a history buff. I guess that’s why I got degrees in Chemistry and Toxicology instead.” Hitting him right back with that pursed-lip smile at the end, mirroring his own. 

My comment didn’t settle well, and I could tell from the way he scratched at his arm like my words were making him itchy as they seeped into his skin. But I liked to make people uncomfortable, as awful as that sounds. Yet I had a sneaking suspicion, I wasn’t the true cause for why he was itching his arm.

“But um, you . . . you were actually right about the silent films. Those were exceedingly popular in the 1920s.” 

His sheepish words seemed to suggest a surrender. As if he was giving me the satisfaction of knowing I was right about something so that I might not be closed off to him entirely, which I was most certainly not, even if it seemed like it. He might have aggravated me slightly with his coldness, but he was arguably the most interesting character out of that team, and I had a feeling he didn’t usually act like this. 

Antsy, fidgeting. 

Unkempt in appearance. 

Often lost in thought. 

Depressed breathing. 

Pinpoint pupils. 

The signs were all there, but that wasn’t what surprised me. I was just surprised that in a team of profilers, no one else seemed to notice him and his addiction, and if they did - they just didn’t care. 

“What drugs are you on?” 

I asked bluntly with a slight head tilt to deepen the notion of my harmless curiosity to which he definitely misinterpreted as a harmful curiosity. I was never one to address things with subtlety and grace, but it seemed like a waste of time to approach this situation with any other attitude than candidness. If my intuition was correct, which I knew it was, he was months into his substance abuse and at this rate, if he wasn’t receiving any help, he’d need to soon. 

“Excuse me?”

“I may not be a profiler, but I’m a toxicologist and I can tell when someone’s on drugs in the same way you can tell when someone’s lying - through studying their behavior. And so far, I’ve noticed that the left cuff of your shirt is unbuttoned, which makes sense considering you’re right-handed, giving you easier access and making it faster to inject whatever it is your taking, but I should warn you - you’re not fast enough. Even though your ‘visits’ to the bathroom have shortened minute by minute, I haven’t been blind to the fact that you’ve gone there at least five times since you’ve been here, and don’t even bother lying. I know you aren’t peeing because you haven’t touched that cup of coffee or the bottled water whatsoever. So let me ask you again - what drugs are you on?”

From the baffled look on his face, I could tell he had never met his match. 

Not until now. 

His eyes were narrowing in on me darkly, and I feared to see his “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” duality, but I was also curious if the oncoming switch in personality would reveal anything more to me about what he was using. However, that was quickly cut short by his sudden burst out of the room, giving me no opportunity to see his fit of rage unfold, and I had to believe that he knew if he stayed a second longer, I would’ve easily been able to distinguish the drug he was on. I wouldn’t put it past him, he was smart enough, that much I could admit. 

I followed him with my eyes as he flew out of the lab, dodging the stupefied Agent Gideon. 

“Reid?” Gideon called out to him, as if he was a dad checking on his hormonal teenager, but neither I, nor the agent, heard a response back. 

Now, turning his attention back to me, Agent Gideon entered the lab, clapping his hands together and rubbing them together in anticipation, completely disregarding what happened only moments ago. It wasn’t even like he was truly uncomfortable and trying to brush it aside so that I wouldn’t be uncomfortable, it just genuinely seemed like he didn’t care. He didn’t feel the need to bring any more attention to the situation, but judging from his reaction, I had doubts on if there had been any attention being paid to the doctor’s drug addiction - ever. 

“So, what do you got for me?” 

“Two things - first, this is clearly Deuterated Chloroform, which is an isotopologue of Chloroform with a single deuterium atom. CDCl 3 is a common solvent used in NMR spectroscopy-” I paused when I realized my toxicology jargon was flying right over his head. “So in other words, this type of Chloroform can daze or knock out people even when it's consumed in small doses.”

“And the second thing?”

Without missing a beat, I asked, “What’s up with that guy?”

His hands unfolded to reach out on either side of him in a shrug as a sign of incomprehensiveness. “Spencer?” He finally pointed with his thumb to the door, which Dr. Reid had just stormed out of. 

I nodded. 

“Ehh, I prefer to leave it alone.” He threw his hands up in surrender, but I wasn’t about to let him maintain his attitude of ignorance. 

“Why? Isn’t it better if he talks about it? I mean, it’s obvious there’s something going on. He’s clearly displaying habits of an addict.” 

The room was shot dead with silence. I could tell he couldn’t believe I’d just said that so bluntly, addressing what I assumed he had yet to even come to terms with. 

“Agent Gideon, I mean this as no insult to you, but I’d surely hope that, even as someone that analyzes behavior for a living, you were sincerely unaware of his addiction and not deliberately avoiding addressing it only because it makes you uncomfortable. Addiction is a very common thing, more common that people would like to believe, and I would hate for Dr. Reid to feel that he’s alone in a room full of people that could help him - that should help him. Or that he can’t turn to any of you without being treated like he's a victim in one of your cases.” 

I wasn’t exactly sure which of my words was the one that crossed the line, but I knew, as a whole, I ventured far beyond the boundary. He didn’t even answer me verbally, but his body language did the talking, and if I heard it correctly, he was dumbfounded by my audacity. 

“You have a good day, Miss.” He finally said with a forced smile, while snatching the evidence bag from my hand. 

Amicably, I had to let it go the minute Agent Gideon left my lab. I shouldn’t care more about the doctor’s wellbeing than his own coworkers, than his own team - than his own family. And even though I was incredibly passionate about proper drug use, I couldn’t be too invested in the care of Dr. Reid. At least not until he started caring about me, too. 

After my minor back-to-back confrontations, I was more than ready to go home. Once I cleaned my station and removed my gear, I was out the door. When I got to the parking lot, I saw that on either side of my car, there were two black SUVs I’d never seen here before. The government license plates were all that I needed to see to come to the conclusion that they belonged to the BAU. Having just instigated something with both Spencer and Agent Gideon, I knew I had to leave before they did, otherwise I might risk running into them, which would’ve been utterly humiliating. 

It was the sudden chirp of familiar voices that caused me to bolt into my car and try and start it, but naturally, buried somewhere within the Bermuda Triangle that was my purse were my keys, and I couldn’t find them in time.

“Hey, I’ll catch up with you guys later.” I faintly heard from behind me. 

Keys! Keys! Keys! Where are you?

With animalistic speed, I rummaged through my purse, literally starving for the feeling of my fingers touching the jagged metal and the remote of my keys before I’d have to -

“Looking for these?” 

I tore my eyes away from my purse to peer up at the sound of my jingling keys as they hung from the index finger of the man I shouldn’t care about. I wryly chuckled, taking them with a goony smile when he handed them to me with much more caution than earlier when he handed me the evidence bag. 

“I saw you left them behind in the lab and I figured you might need those. Especially if you’re trying to run away from me.” 

“I’m not trying to run away from you.” 

My words were unaffecting, only leaving him with more reason to doubt me, evidenced by his deadpan stare. 

“Really! I wasn’t!” It was beyond me why I thought speaking more loudly would make him digest my words any better, but at any rate, it did. 

“Okay, okay, relax. I believe you.”

We shared a brief laugh, the euphoria of which was fleeting, and then, we were right back to where we were before. Back to square one - not knowing what to say. The uncomfortable silence pressed me to leave, but he must’ve registered my sudden movement as a tell that he needed to say something so captivating, so shocking, so bewitching, that would stop me from leaving. 

“Thank you.”

To say that I was baffled would be a gross understatement. I was in complete awe and disbelief. Hearing those words from his lips was enough to stun me, but even more so because of how sincere it sounded. 

“I was going to come back and apologize when I overheard you and Gideon talking about me. You left before I got the chance to thank you for what you said back there. So . . . thank you.”

And yet again, he thanked me, and surprisingly, it wasn’t any less pleasing to the ear. 

“Yeah, of course. I was just worried about you that’s all.” Unknowingly, I revealed too much out of the blinding bliss of the moment. 

“You were worried about me?” 

His own question brought me to the realization of what I’d just said, and in his tone of voice, I also became aware of the connotation behind it. He already knew the answer and just wanted to hear me say it again, so I nudged him playfully to avoid reciting my confession. 

“Actually, I take that back. Why should I worry over someone who didn’t even bother to know my name?” 

He looked quite offended; his neck recoiled in distaste. 

“I know your name.”

“You didn’t ask me for it.”

“That doesn’t mean I don’t know it, (y/n).” Drawing out my name just to demonstrate his honest knowledge of it. 

“Actually, it’s Doctor.” I corrected, earning a hearty laugh from him, one that made him throw his head back with an open mouthed smile. 

In my playful jest, he was reminded of himself and his own uncannily similar humor. He could see himself in me. (Mind you, this distinction was completely unknown to me). It was only he that could see we were foils of each other - parallel lines that ran side by side, never fated to intersect but forging a connection in spite of that; a connection formed on the basis of close proximity and congruence in shape.

“Anyway, thanks for bringing my keys. I’ll see you later.” 

Our goodbye was too quick, I knew that, but I couldn’t, in good conscience, keep talking to him and avoid bringing up the conversation of his addiction. I wasn’t nuanced like that. I was too eager to solve problems head on to keep my determination at bay. I couldn’t dance around the very thing that was killing him slowly. I just couldn’t. Had I drawn out our conversation any longer, I’d sooner touch that tender wound he restlessly picked at; a wound that might never properly or fully heal if he kept doing so. I knew he was too stubborn to let me clean it, so in favor of his pride, he insisted he could fix it himself and simply put a band-aid on it in an attempt to do just that, foolishly thinking it would be enough. However, like a real gash, tear, or cut, it may only be worsened by the lack of adequate disinfection. He could just as easily reap the benefits as he could suffer the consequences of the absence of a proper enabling agent that stings badly, but successfully targets the root of the problem. The choice was up to him. Would he suffer the consequences or reap the benefits? To be quite frank, there’s no way around that disinfectant. It’s that or nothing, and I found myself to be the confrontation to the problem that he lacked. So now that I’d addressed it, it was up to him to decide what to do. I had done all that I could, and I had to accept that. 

Maybe a minute more of talking to him and I might’ve even seen that connection he was seeing. I assure you, a few more soulful glances was all it would take to kill me in cold blood. If you could get intoxicated on someone’s eyes, I’d be drunk on his. I saw worlds behind them - raging waters of words unspoken bursting from overflowing dams, calm seas of his thank you’s, maybe even lazy rivers of useless stored information and memorized book passages I could dawdle in forever. An overwhelming guilt consumed me when I realized I’d only been staring at them for as long as I had to probe further and satisfy my own selfish desires. I felt all the worse for the unsuspecting object of my gaze who was led to the hopeful, naive notion that I was looking at him out of admiration. He had no clue what I was really doing. 

I was profiling him. 

Earlier in the day, I would’ve gloated about my ability to use his own job against him by employing the skill of profiling, but now, it was different. He was different. The guilt was escalating quickly and I made haste to get in my car, not even waiting to catch his reply to my sudden goodbye before I shut the door. If I had to assume, he must’ve said something in agreement because the minute I turned on my ignition, he stepped out of the way, letting me leave with no protests. Quite haphazardly, I drove out of my parking spot, reducing him to just a blurry figure in my rear view mirror that would haunt my dreams at night and occupy my thoughts in the day. Consider it merely a precaution to part from him so promptly. I needed my distance before I did something we both would have regretted. 

Before I started to love him. 

. . . 

“Positive for Alprazolam. Positive for Carboxy-THC,” I mumbled to myself while I jotted down the results of my preliminary toxicology report. You’d often find me in this state and by that I mean, it’s been more than one occasion where someone walked in on me talking to myself. I found that it was easier to make note of things when I spoke it out loud, even if just to myself in a hushed tone. “Negative for -”

“Am I interrupting you?” 

I pulled my eye away from the lens and upwards to the voice beckoning me at the door. To my surprise, it was Spencer. 

“No, not at all. What’s up?” 

As he made his way to my station, I instinctively shot up in my seat to fix my posture into one more ladylike and graceful, pulling my shoulders back as if there was a string tugging at them. It was a stark contrast to my previous hunched over position that rounded my back out almost to the point of looking like a half-circle. It was the most natural position for me, and arguably more comfortable, too, but now in Spencer’s presence, I wanted to assume a more flattering position. For what reason? I didn’t know. 

“I, um . . .” He cleared his throat and adjusted the collar of his shirt frantically. “I’m going to see a film tonight in Sky Meadows State Park. I was wondering if you wanted to come.” 

It was easy to meet his eyes until he said what he did. Reflexively, I looked down at my microscope to shy away from his gaze so he might not see the color forming on my cheeks. 

“That’s really sweet of you,” I began. “But I should probably get this report done first.” 

I wouldn’t have noticed I was tapping my pen on my paper anxiously had it not been for Spencer’s eyes drifting to the motion. After consciously stopping it, he looked back at me, seeing that similarity again. 

I was just as nervous as he was. 

“Yeah, yeah of course. Next time, then.” 

My heart sank at the visceral blow to his ego. I didn’t intend to shatter his confidence, but by the time he turned on his heels with his hands sheepishly shoved into his pockets, I knew it was not the first time someone declined an offer of his. 

“Actually,” One word was enough to draw him in. “I can finish this up another time. I’d much rather catch that movie with you instead.” 

I wish I could tell you that my intentions were pure. That I was going because I knew I would enjoy his company and he would enjoy mine, but that wasn’t it at all. It was that familiar itch again that made my ‘yes’ easier to say. 

The itch to dig deeper and to know more. 

“Great. I’ll wait outside for you.” 

The rational part of me knew that if I couldn’t let his addiction go, it’d be the death of me. But if I did, it’d be the death of him. Literally.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

PART 2 HERE!

[nayanuwa]

If charmed were smart (it’s not) or willing to take risks and be a little messy (it’s not), we could have easily had:

Harry/Abigael as a weird messy midgame ship (I mean, they are already canonically attracted to each other!) The show could have easily invented a magical reason for Harry to be less ‘good’ in order to accomplish this (something to do with Jimmy, probably)

This could have happened WHILE Macy was with Julian, and even better, *after* she got with Julian, so that Macy notices that she’s jealous of Harry with Abi, which of course she ~shouldn’t be~ because she chose to be with Julian first. And then, depending on timing, when Macy/Julian ends, Macy realizes she wants to be with Harry, but Harry is not ready to be with her. (the ANGST. could be delicious.)

Harry breaking up with Abi and realizing all the ways Macy is a much better person than Abi, and realizing the ways that Abigael manipulated him, and other people (slowly breaking out of her spell, in other words.) This *almost* happened in canon anyway, but without the fun of canon ships

Abi using the breakup with Harry as an excuse to do bad things (perhaps), and/or, hit rock bottom and realize that she needs to change and be accountable for her bad behavior, if she doesn’t want to lose people. Abi acting petty and jealous about Harry and Macy, and Harry describing all the very good reasons why he does not want to be with her anymore. Abi *maybe* finally listening to sense.

ABIMEL. okay, OKAY!!! slowburn, enemies-to-lovers, to redeemed Abi and possible endgame Abimel. Or heck, they don’t even have to be endgame I just want to see it! I’m actually baffled because I genuinely thought the show was going this way! But now that Abi’s leaving the show I guess not??? (I really hope this info is wrong.)

But it’s messy in the best way okay!! Mel trying to convince herself that she’s *not* attracted to Abi, possibly keeping some of their dalliances a secret from her sisters, and series of we’re-not-together-but-keep-sleeping-together episodes, Abi starting to change for the better because of Mel (and other factors), but not wanting to admit that exactly, Mel refusing to be with her unless she changes, at some point (whether this leads to a permanent breakup OR a redemption arc I don’t even care, just give it to me.)

Just one awkward conversation with Harry and Mel while on mission about sleeping with the same person (and Abi of all people) I would have died

But instead, because charmed refuses to be good, we get Harry/Macy and Maggie/Jordan as slowburns slowed to a crawl, and Mel with an extremely one-dimensional girlfriend with no development whatsoever, who may as well have not existed this season with her lack of screentime.

[willow-salix]

(Today's update for the fluffember prompt: whimsical, is brought to you by the amazing @myladykayo as the guest writer.)

Day 14 of isolation on Tracy Island 2.0

  

Knowing a second confinement period was going to happen doesn’t make it easier but at least we know a little more of what to expect this time. It’s not that bad, really. Things are not all that different for me, come to think of it. I still cook, clean, or try to have my grandsons act like responsible adults and do their part—and patch them up when they get injured.

Because apparently, just because they aren’t going out on rescues doesn’t mean they aren’t still injuring themselves, and believe me, they manage to do so in the most spectacular ways. Thank goodness John’s wife arrived right before lockdown to bring a little sanity to this madhouse.

We were both sitting at one of the picnic tables on the terrace with Jeff and Kayo, enjoying a moment of relative quietness. The boys were in the pool, playing some sort of ball game. I thought perhaps that this would be a day where nothing dramatic or ridiculous happened...

Sigh. I should have known better.

I must admit that there are times lately when I’m not sure what day of the week it is, or even what time of day, for that matter. So, when the alarm went off on my watch, I was as surprised as the others sitting with me. It was two o’ clock. I stopped the ringing, trying to figure out a way to go back inside to settle down with my viewing partner for another episode of the Big and the Boisterous.

Alan, who had decided that he didn’t feel like playing anymore had joined us at the table at the same moment. He whined a bit when our witch engulfed him in a hug but I know he’s putting up a show and he really loves the attention from her. “What’s this for, Grandma?” he asked, nodding toward my wrist. “It’s not... dinner time yet,” he added with a careful tone of voice as if he regretted mentioning meals.

She leant into him and whispered something that visibly reassured him. She probably told him she was going to cook—don’t tell anyone but it suits me too!

“It’s something I have to do,” I said.

I saw understanding dawn on our witch’s face and she smiled at me.

“Did you want to come along, dear?” I asked her.

Her expression changed to something I could qualify as a “heartburn face,” which I found a little disconcerting, but Alan chose that moment to exclaim: “Come along where? Can I go too?”

He darted a look toward her and I suspect that she kicked him under the table, thinking I couldn’t see her. They all think I’m blind but I see everything.

The comms unit on the table bleeped. While I noticed it was my colour on there and knew it was Mike (you might know him as the Mechanic) and was going to wait before answering, my son just pressed the button out of habit and his hologram popped out. Mike was clearly not expecting to have an audience and it showed on his face.

“Hey, Mike,” both Alan and John’s wife exclaimed at the same time; Kayo smiled and gave him a little wave.

“Erm, hello.” He looked at me. “I can call back later...”

Our viewing session is actually recorded. The show isn’t actually at 2 o’clock but it's usually a quiet time in the household and we use the video on demand service to watch—that way we can skip the ads. We debate on a lot of things during our watch sessions but we both agree that we can’t stand to watch it live.

“Oh, no! It’s your time, Grandma, don’t let us hold you back,” our witch said.

“We can stay and chat a bit now that we’re here, can’t we, Mike?” I asked, feeling that it was impolite to just leave at this point.

“I suppose we can...” he sounded about as enthusiastic as when he tried to peel off that charcoal facial mask I had him try for his T-zone.  

“I’m almost certain I will regret asking, but how did this all begin anyway?” John’s wife motioned between the holoprojector and me.

Mike rolled his eyes and sighed. “Might as well get this over with...” he muttered.

Everyone around the table, including Kayo, gathered around closer to listen in. I’m not sure why people think it’s extraordinary that I’ve welcomed Mike to the household. He was on the island for months while they prepared the Zero-XL so it’s only natural that I tried to bring him out of his shell.

“It all started when Mike was working on the T-Drive, and just like the rest of you, he has a habit of not stopping to rest and can be stubborn—”

“We were on a tight schedule and I wanted the drive to work. I had an idea about optimizing the fuel intakes and I wanted to try it right away,” he cut me off.  

 As if he realized that the reason for the tight schedule was right there at the table, he stopped, looking a little sheepish. Mike really fits in with the rest of them. Doesn’t know when to stop and too modest for his own good. No wonder I took him under my wing so naturally.

“So you went in after dinner, when you were supposed to be resting, and you didn’t have your protective boots on,” I provided.

“Oooh, I remember that!” Alan exclaimed, right before he scrunched his face at the memory. “Ohhh, yeah.”

“That bad?” our witch asked.

“I would have been fine, but apparently a little cut warranted ‘calling Grandma,’” he explained, air quoting the last part and sounding annoyed, but I could see the twinkle in his eye. He’s a good kid.

I ignored him and replied to her: “I’m telling you, dear, just like the others. Saying it’s nothing when he’s leaving a trail like Little Thumbling.” She made a face because she’s not quite at ease with blood and needles—quite ironic considering the family she married into if you ask me—so I moved on quickly. “I bandaged him up and had him settle down in the lounge with a snack so that he could rest and I could keep an eye on him.”

“I was forced to watch… dreadful things. And I couldn’t walk away.”

Mike had his “harsh and scary” face on but I know him by now and he was actually becoming more at ease as the conversation went. I couldn’t help rolling my eyes at him.

“Sure, we had to do a few adjustments at first, but don’t deny it young man, when I picked a series about boxing, you were hooked.”

“Boxing?” Alan’s expression was as doubtful as his tone of voice.

“What? Why are you making that face?” I asked

“Well you’re a grandma... don’t grandmas watch more whimsical shows like Walnut Grove or that singing academy one?”

“Clef-Hangers isn’t whimsical, it’s brain-numbing and unrealistic.”

I didn’t know where to direct my scolding gaze between Mike, who dared to criticize Clef-Hangers, or my own treacherous son, who thought he was really smart by hiding his scoff with a cough. I am so misunderstood in this household sometimes.

Jeff calmed down rather quickly as he seemed to realize something. “Wait… Boxing? The Big and the Boisterous is still running after all these years?” He seemed baffled. “Last time I saw it, before I was lost in the Oort cloud, Magdelena was pretending to be a rich investor so that Carlos noticed her and invited her to the gym.”

“Oh no, things have progressed a lot. They are married now and have five children. Her habit of buying expensive clothes and shoes to look like an investor turned into a shopping addiction though,” I said.

“Three. The two youngest ones aren’t his,” Mike growled.

“Well she was bearing the youngest for her best friend who couldn’t have children but by some miracle she became pregnant by  Carlos, so Magdelena decided to keep the baby. Carlos thinks the baby is his, however there was a fertility clinic involved, so we don’t know who the father actually is,” I felt I had to explain to the others.

“Magdelena doesn’t know her friend’s baby is Carlos’.”

“No. Charles is waiting for his moment to drop this titbit of information.”

It’s so easy to fall back in our discussion and speculations—healthy debating—but at this point, I could see Alan’s eyes were glazing over and John’s wife was frowning and mouthing something to herself. It’s not that complicated... youngsters these days, no attention span whatsoever.

“But... wasn’t Charles harbouring his secret the last time I, um, was there? That was months ago,” she said.

The dear girl was sensible and didn’t mention any beauty treatments that could have ruffled Mike’s feathers. “Careful planning takes time. They follow a realistic timeline,” I explained.

A non-committal sound came out of her mouth and Jeff choked on his coffee. How dare! Sometimes, he’s as bad as his  sons. I continued my story: “Anyway, after having to stay put for a couple of days, Mike couldn’t miss an episode anymore and began pretending to be busy close by when I was watching—”

“I did not!” he spluttered.

“And we ended up setting a time and began watching regularly. There’s really nothing much to it. It was our quiet time from you rowdy lot and we just continued it when Mike moved off the island.”

“The whole situation is kind of whimsical if you think about it,” John’s wife commented, earning a smile from Kayo and a nod from Alan.

I don’t think Mike ever was called whimsical in his life. And from the look on his face, he was thinking the exact same thing.

“I’m half tempted to watch now... I mean if Mike likes it...” Alan commented.

“You can jump in at any time, honey, Mike and I will quickly put you up to date. A big boxing championship is coming up and it will be exciting. However, we still don’t know if Carlos will recover from his drinking phase, today could be revelation time,” I mentioned.

“It’s not a drinking phase!"

" He was poisoned!” 

Both Mike and Kayo protested at the same time, then stopped and looked at each other, startled.

The table grew silent at the revelation.

“You watch the Big and the Boisterous too?” Alan asked, his expression a mix of curiosity and glee at the thought of obtaining some precious blackmail info from this discussion.

“... not all the time. I... I study the fight scenes,” she huffed and sat there, sulking, her face slightly darker than usual.

John’s wife raised her eyebrows. “Why? In case you need to throw birthday cake at your opponents? Unless you find one of Carlos’ sons cute...”

Kayo gasped indignantly. “I do not!”

Both girls elbowed each other, calling each other names, but they were also trying to hold back laughter so I didn’t worry about it. They have their own language by now and they keep the boys on their toes each time they team up.

I couldn’t help to take a moment to wonder which of Carlos’ sons could have caught my adoptive granddaughter’s fancy, however. I’m still not sure.

Jeff must have decided that both my viewing partner and Kayo had suffered enough because he hugged me, kissed my temple and said: “Well, go ahead, Ma, go have your moment and find out what’s happening at the gym. We’ll keep busy.”

“Call me when you are ready,” Mike said, before saying goodbye to everyone and giving Jeff a respectful nod and a “Sir.”

I don’t think he’ll ever be able to call my son by his name, or me by my own for that matter. And I have tried. I’d even accept “Grandma” now. But he won’t call me that anymore. He said it wouldn’t be respectful after what he did to us in the past.

I haven’t given up yet. Must be my whimsical side.

I stood from the picnic table to retreat to my room, but only managed to make it halfway to the kitchen when I heard a commotion coming from the pool area.

I told you,  I should have known better.

Sure enough, when I turned around, I saw my eldest grandson out of the pool clutching his foot. John’s wife sprung out of her seat with impressive speed, yelling “Oh for crying out loud! I have my back turned for two seconds and you manage to injure yourself, you big doofus!”

She stormed past me, grumbling: “I’ll get the first-aid kit...”

 

I guess Carlos’ drinking situation would have to wait yet a little more.

[the-desolated-quill]

BBC’s The War Of The Worlds blog - Episode 1

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this episode yet, you may want to before reading this review)

I was very much looking forward to the BBC’s adaptation of the H.G. Wells sci-fi classic. How could I not? It’s the definitive alien invasion story that jump-started an entire genre of science fiction  Not to mention this is the first adaptation made by a British film company and actually set in the time period it was written. I was very excited. Nothing could possibly dampen my spirits... until I learned who was writing it.

Peter Harness is a writer I’ve been less than kind to in the past. For those who don’t know, he wrote some of the worst episodes of Doctor Who. Remember that stupid story about the moon being an egg? Yeah, that was him. He also has a penchant for writing painfully forced and thinly veiled allegories with all the grace and subtlety of a ballet dancing rhino in a glow in the dark tutu. Kill The Moon, for example, was a pro life metaphor that portrayed the other side as being irrational baby killers, and his Zygon two parter was about Muslim immigration and integration, with the slimy repulsive Zygons being used as stand-ins for Muslims and non-white immigrants.

Harness’ ability to write allegorical stories about sensitive topics is... under-developed, to say the least. So naturally he’s the perfect candidate to adapt one of the most beloved sci-fi stories ever written. I mean, why not? The BBC have already ruined Sherlock Holmes, courtesy of Steven Moffat. Why stop there?

In all seriousness, while I wasn’t excited about the prospect of Harness getting his grubby mitts on War Of The Worlds, part of me hoped that maybe he could pull something out of the bag. You may recall I held a very similar negative view toward Chris Chibnall, and his first series as showrunner of Doctor Who was an extremely pleasant surprise. Maybe Harness could achieve his own metamorphosis.

He doesn’t.

The first episode of War Of The Worlds was fucking tedious to sit through. It actually looked quite promising initially. We get some nice moody shots of the surface of Mars as Eleanor Tomlinson recites the famous opening lines of the book. But then just after the opening titles, it all goes downhill.

I was sceptical when it was announced that this would be a three parter because that just seemed too much. A feature length film you could do. Maybe a two parter, at a push. But three episodes? Each an hour long? That’s going to require a lot of padding, and that’s exactly what Episode 1 is. We see the Martian cylinders launch from the planet at the beginning of the episode and it’s not until the forty minute mark where we get our first proper glimpse of the Tripods or the heat rays. So what do we get in the mean time? Mostly pointless shit.

The original War Of The Worlds book isn’t exactly remembered for its characterisation. Outside of the astronomer Ogilvy, none of the characters even have names, but to be fair to Wells, the characters themselves weren’t really the driving force of the narrative. The Martians were. The narrator, a journalist, was merely there to relay and facilitate the plot, giving us a first hand account of the subjugation of Earth. Fine for a book, but somewhat harder to get away with in a film or TV series, which is why most don’t even try. Every single adaptation of War Of The Worlds attempts to expand on the central characters to varying degrees of success, and the BBC version is no exception. But where Harness really miscalculates is in anticipating how much the audience is going to care about the characters, to which the answer is ‘not that much.’ We don’t want them to die obviously, but we’re not so interested in who they are or where they come from because they’re not the main focus. The Martians are. So to have a significant chunk of the episode focusing on their day to day lives is quite baffling. Not to mention unbelievably boring.

George, played by Rafe Spall, is living out of wedlock with Amy, played by Eleanor Tomlinson, which causes their neighbours’ tongues to clack and net curtains to twitch. The only person supporting their union is Ogilvy, played by Robert Carlysle, which is how they learn about the mysterious goings on the surface of Mars. This is all established in the first five minutes, but as I said, the Martians don’t properly show up until the forty minute mark. Until then we’re subjected to painfully forced and tediously dull ‘right on’ posturing and irrelevant social commentary that adds nothing to the core narrative.

Here’s the thing. I’ve got nothing against the idea of expanding the characters. I definitely have no problem with giving the narrator’s wife from the book more development and screen time. In fact I’m all in favour of it. What I do have a problem with, however, is when that expansion and development comes at the expense of the plot.

A man and a woman shacked up together in defiance of society is all well and good, but what does any of this have to do with War Of The Worlds? It’s not even as if Harness tries to connect this back to the story’s main themes of imperialism and colonialism. It’s mentioned that Amy was born and raised in India. Maybe if she was an Indian woman, it could have been more thematically relevant, but no. Once again we have a period drama with no people of colour because, as we all know, non-white people weren’t invented until 1962. Also, while I get that society at the time was very strict, I’m not entirely convinced George and Amy’s relationship would have been that scandalous to the point where it would have affected his career as a journalist. That just seems like a step too far and is merely there to add some artificial tension... in a story about Martians invading the Earth.

In the end it all comes down to this. Why the fuck should I care? What’s the bloody point of this? Yes it expands the characters, but it doesn’t contribute anything to the narrative. It just wastes time. Again, I must stress, we don’t get our first Martian until forty minutes into an hour long episode. Previous adaptations never felt the need to bore the audience to death with pointless shit because they knew what audiences came to see. Martians blowing shit up. Steven Spielberg’s adaptation of War Of The Worlds from 2005 didn’t piss about giving us needless exposition about Tom Cruise and his family. We’re given the basic info about the characters and their relationships within the first ten minutes before the Tripods emerge and the action gets going. The BBC version, in contrast, is just painfully slow, dictating every tiny thing about these characters even when it’s not relevant to the plot.

And the thing is, once we actually get to the bits from the actual book (you know? The bits people actually want to see?), it’s actually pretty good. The Tripod looks incredible, as was the scene in Horsell Common where we saw people getting killed by the heat ray. Unfortunately we have to slog through all this other crap before we can get to the good stuff.

Eleanor Tomlinson probably gives the strongest performance as Amy. It’s just a pity the character is so utterly uninteresting. Like I said, I’ve got nothing against giving her a bigger role than she had in the book, but it feels like Harness is more interested in showing off his feminist credentials than actually telling a story or creating a believable or likeable character. Her being an assistant to Ogilvy I think is a great idea, but it soon becomes clear that this was only done so other male scientists could comment on how unusual it is to have a woman digging up a crashed cylinder, which is kind of ridiculous because I’m pretty sure female scientists did exist back then and you don’t exactly need a penis to use a fucking shovel. Then things turn really stupid when George’s brother, played by Rupert Graves, starts blaming her for the Martian invasion, saying that everything was going fine until she came along. Exploring 19th century sexism is one thing, but this is just daft. There’s no interest in actually exploring the root causes of sexism back then. Instead Harness seems content with portraying men as being the equivalent of cartoon caricatures foaming at the mouth.

George, meanwhile, goes from being a fairly boring character to a downright hateful one when it’s revealed that he and Amy aren’t just living out of wedlock, but that he cheated on his missus because she was infertile. So not only do I not care about him, I now straight up want him to die because what the actual fuck?! And this is not helped by Rafe Spall’s incredibly wooden performance. Seriously, I’ve seen corpses with more life in them. When the Tripod first emerges, we see him stare at it in what I assume was supposed to be shock, but instead he just looked gormless. It’s honest to God one of the worst performances I think I’ve ever seen. There’s no emotional range to him whatsoever. He just blunders around wearing a confused frown on his face. It’s as if he had just wandered onto the set by mistake.

The biggest problem with this first episode is that Harness is focusing on all the wrong areas. A large segment is dedicated to George investigating the Dogger Bank incident, which seems to be an attempt at making a parallel between the UK’s tenuous relationship with Russia then and now. What this has to do with War Of The Worlds, I don’t know. There’s so far been no attempt at exploring the themes of the source material as we’re too busy with this shitty romance. There’s even a moment where we see the characters dig up the cylinder and take a photo only for the same exact scene to happen five minutes later. I mean for fuck sake!

And then there’s the pointless plot twists. First we get the cliched pregnancy reveal, then it’s revealed that the scenes we thought were on Mars turned out to actually be a post apocalyptic Earth with Amy and a seven year old kid who is presumably her son. Wait, how long has this fucking invasion been going on for?! It only lasted a couple of weeks in the book! What happened? Did the Martians get vaccinated? This just highlights to me how inept Harness is as a writer. He can’t just do a straight adaptation of War Of The Worlds. He has to engineer these pointless and utterly idiotic cliffhangers to get people to keep watching because the story and characters clearly aren’t doing that.

If I wasn’t committed to reviewing this mini-series, I honestly wouldn’t watch the rest of this. This first episode is legitimately terrible. Boring, poorly thought out and utterly, utterly clueless. Just like everything else Peter Harness has ever written. I don’t understand why he was chosen to adapt War Of The Worlds and I don’t understand why he chose to adapt it in this way. Why so much focus on pointless exposition? Why over-complicate the lives of the main characters? Why can’t they just be a normal married couple living a life of privilege until the Martians come and trample all over it? It makes no sense! Some could defend this saying it was building tension until the Martians emerged, but there’s a significant difference between making an audience nervously anticipate the Tripods arrival and making them wait impatiently for something, anything, interesting to happen.

[kaoarika]

A couple of things about the HypMic manga I want to say based on the scanlations /summaries around, so spoilers ahoy (as of August 27, 2019)-

About Before the Battle:

I still think it has the most nice art of the bunch.

Still cannot believe the turn that they are giving it of as canon. Maybe in my head I was expecting something better? as backstory, even though some elements click pretty well here and there. Like, Jakurai’s past as a hitman makes SO MUCH sense... and his way to become a doctor as a mean to atone from his past’s actions, feels also... right for some reason?

In some ways, it’s pretty understandable giving the world they are living with (a post WWIII one), and how men are taking approach to it, especially as how Central Ward was established in Japan.

I still want to know “why”. Why Ramuda (or Central Ward) picked Ichiro, Samatoki, and Jakurai. I can of assume it was because Ichiro and Samatoki had great abilities and they clearly showed that when they took their respective territories with their respective partners... but why picking Jakurai, who was a former hitman? It would translate well into the mechanism of the mics? Or because something entirely else.

Although, I find it criminal a couple of things, including turning the head of the orphanage that the Yamada siblings were in, as an entire as*hole who will do things just for the name of money (and last month I wasn’t that off about WHY).

Look, I can buy that Jiro and Saburo hated how Ichiro was here, especially if they seemed to have idolized him when they were younger because he is their last blood-related family... so him as a punk and finding out he was doing bad stuff is... plausible. But also being fed with ideas cemented by the orphanage’s head is also plausible :|c

Oh, at least Jyuto appeared... but again was expecting much more better for a cameo of him in this storyline *sigh*

I feel bad for Nemu and wish she doesn’t become traumatized by this kidnapping thing, even though she knows her brother is in the Yakuza. WE STILL DON’T KNOW WHERE IS SHE IN THE PRESENT, THOUGH.

Maybe I’m still a bit sad that some of the headcanons I had last year are being pulled down from their feet :)))

Then again, *I* can bend canon as much as I want. I mean, i’m a bit disappointed, yeah.

About BB & MTC side:

The art makes me feel baffled for some reason. In some scenes, it’s pretty nice to look at... in others, not so much. I like how the artist tends to draw MTC... not so much with the BBs, especially Ichiro. And this month’s chapter’s preview is now viceversa...

I like how they paced and gave info about the backgrounds of Jyuto and Riou.

HEY, if you have an opportunity to introduce Nemu’s present self, it’s in THIS manga! And I’m still waiting before present official lore in Drama Tracks comes in next season. I really just hope she doesn’t become a satellite character to Samatoki (or give him “man pain”, because I’m REALLY thinking in sad stuff about her, even though he did mention something about her at the end of The Champion CD’s Drama Track gives me hope she isn’t doing THAT bad???).

I don’t have much to say, in all honesty?I don’t too much to complain about. (And my complaints about the art style being wonky at times, at least they gave us Ichiro’s tiddies memes *bricked*)

About FP & M side:

Has the prettiest art style of the three??? Although flaws happen.

I liked how they were showing FP’s friendship developed in a short time because it makes it feel right when you listen to the Drama Track in their Battle Season CD, and it provides some... up-to-interpretation(?) context for “Stella”, too.

However, I think it lacks something?

I think partly it has to be the pace. Which was different from the other side-series.

Not saying it’s a bad thing whatsoever, but I suspect that, instead of digging much more into Dice or Gentaro, besides few hints here and there, they are planning to make some revelations in the Drama Tracks instead of showing it off here. Like I have mentioned before, Fling Posse are wildcards, and they are still the most mysterious trio of the bunch. And if it looks like Ramuda recruited them in a way as it probably happened with TDD... it indeed makes me wonder.

That being said, I wish Ramuda wasn’t still that much of a mysterious character besides what we know about him... but again, related to above.

Kinda wish we had much more inside stuff about Central Ward, though... BUT I SUPPOSE THEY WANT US TO FOLLOW THE CDS FOR THIS TO HAPPEN. I MEAN, let’s take a look to the ETHM album’s drama tracks, for a bit of “there’s something going on here and we don’t know what it is yet”.

It may be me, but there wasn’t too much focus in Matenrou, tho? Like, okay, we did have a glimpse to their personal lives and what not... (I’m taking the side Drama Track from their single aside). And Jakurai’s past is briefly touched in Before the Battle... however... 

I do want to know why Hifumi has gynophobia and this hasn’t been mentioned as of yet...? unless they explain it when they adapt that part from their side track in their Battle Season CD.

[nadziejastar]

The organization members death were underwhelming. Your thoughts on their deaths???

Yeah, I have to agree. I take it you mean the Organization members in KH3. The True Organization was so underwhelming.

Master Xehanort—The game never properly explained his motivations, so I wasn’t quite sure how to feel about his death. He had a very abrupt “redemption” where he and Eraqus were all buddy-buddy again, which came out of nowhere. I had no idea what was even going on in his boss fight. What were those black-clad figures fighting with him? How did Sora know he needed to trap him using a portal? Nothing was explained. In theory I liked kid Xehanort��s reunion with kid Eraqus. But it didn’t have enough impact because there was nothing building up to it, other than a single scene of them playing chess.

Xemnas—I liked his final words before disappearing, but it felt like they came out of nowhere. There was no evidence Xemnas ever felt that way. Why was he so lonely? It seems like he was supposed to be seen as tragic, but again, there was nothing leading up to it. I felt like we got robbed. We never learned why he couldn’t use the Keyblade. Also I was very disappointed that we never saw Aqua or Ventus react when they learned that Terra was possessed and that his Heartless and Nobody were the ones that were causing all the chaos in the world.

Young Xehanort—This guy was super important to the plot. He was the one who was traveling through time recruiting everyone. Supposedly he was tracking people using the Recusant’s Sigil. He was tracking Sora in KH3D, and the Ultimania said he had his eye on Isa for a long time. Unsurprisingly Young Xehanort is the one who retrieved Isa in KH3D. But he didn’t feel all that important, really. His time travel ability was left mostly unexplained. His death was completely forgettable. We never even learned why he was the Mysterious Figure in BBS.

Ansem Seeker of Darkness—Again, another resolution that felt like it was supposed to have way more building up to it. Why did Riku say he’d miss him? That truly came out of nowhere and surprised me. At first I thought it was Nomura breaking the fourth wall. He said in an interview that he was sad that certain characters would never be appearing again, and he did really like Xehanort. But I did notice that ASoD’s characterization was strange in KH3. Perhaps Riku was meant to be referring to the Terra part of him. After all, the relationship between Xehanort and Terra, and how those two personalities were split was supposed to be important to the cancelled game. And Riku recognized Terra at the end of KH3D.

Vanitas—I got the impression that Vanitas was supposed to be a lot more important to the plot than he really was. He felt so useless in the grand scheme of things. I thought he’d have a lot more to do with Sora, too .Also, in KH3D, he didn’t have a physical form. Sora saw him with Young Xehanort, but he was simply reacting to Ventus’s heart. I think Vanitas was supposed to have a lot more plot involvement, like with Xemnas’s search for the Chamber of Waking. And after Ventus went back to Sora, maybe Vanitas could feel what Sora felt.

He was also Ven’s dark half, which should have been more significant. I always thought Ven would have to go through some kind of character development where he reintegrated Vanitas back into him at the end. But Vanitas just…disappeared. Also, the fact that he looked like Sora was not treated like it was a big deal. Sora was just like, “Oh that’s weird.” Kinda like Roxas and Ventus or Kairi and Xion. It was just…never commented on. I was amused by the fact that Vanitas didn’t suddenly do a 180 after he was defeated. But he still didn’t leave a significant impression on me in KH3.

Riku—When I first learned that Riku was a Seeker of Darkness, I thought it had the potential to create some awesome story moments. But his defeat was ridiculous. I expected Riku to have some kind of clash with his dark half, where he’d get character development confronting his inner weakness. In KH3D, there was a lot of hints that his struggle with the darkness was not over.

When I first played KH3D a long time ago, I was actually annoyed because I thought they were dragging out Riku’s struggle instead of just accepting he was a good guy. But I think I kinda see where they were going. Riku did need closure on what happened to him in KH1. Sadly, he didn’t get that. Instead, the boss battle with his dark self was treated as this weird Riku/Naminé shipping thing, which really caught me off guard. I had NO idea what was going on with the weird Spirit Riku. That just made no sense and I really wondered what the hell Nomura was smoking when he wrote those scenes. In hindsight, I just see it as a contrived excuse to bring Naminé back. But when I first played KH3, Riku Replica’s death really left me scratching my head.

Marluxia—I couldn’t really feel anything for Marluxia’s defeat because I had no idea why he was even there. He received almost no backstory. So even in KH3, to me he was little more than “the flower dude”. I was aware that he was in KHUX, but I had no idea that game was going to be so important when I played KH3. Silly me, I was under the impression that the HD remasters were made to give players everything they needed to prepare for KH3.

KHUX was included in the form of a movie. And I mistakenly thought that movie was created to give players all the info they needed from KHUX that was relevant in KH3. But that really wasn’t the case. Apparently, I was supposed to know all about who Strelitzia and Skuld were, which I did not. When speaking to the Nameless Star, I admit I didn’t have a clue who it was and I had a hard time caring, since they had absolutely nothing to do with THIS plot arc.

Larxene—Larxene was the same as Marluxia for me. She was little more than “the bitchy chick”. I was looking forward to learning more about her and Marluxia, but that didn’t happen. Apparently she was just tagging along with him? That’s why she was a Seeker of Darkness? I thought that was lame. I read on the wiki that she had a sister or something.

But you see, if those types of things were supposed to be relevant, why was none of it included in the HD collections? That was baffling. In KH CoM, Marluxia and Larxene wanted Sora so they could use the Keyblade for something. They both seemed pretty amoral. In KH3, they made Marluxia seem like Isa or something, where he lost his heart, was possessed the whole time, and needed to be saved. Then he would be absolved of all his sins. But unlike with Saïx, that was never really hinted at? I never got that sense from Marluxia.

Luxord—Again, why is this person here? How did he become a Seeker of Darkness? Who is he? What was his life as a human like? I had a really hard time caring about his boss fight because he felt like he was just included for nostalgia. Same with Marluxia and Larxene. They just needed a few familiar faces to fill out the ranks. I’m sure that there was originally supposed to be a good reason he was a Seeker of Darkness, but they obviously had no time to get into that. I like Luxord. I think he’s really cool and gentlemanly. But we still know nothing about him.

Xigbar—His “death” was also lame. The moment he jumped off the ledge was made to seem all dramatic and final. And you know, I would have really liked if it was left like that. Xigbar committing suicide truly was the perfect ending for him. But surprise! It was all revealed to be a ruse. Why did he have to pretend to kill himself? Wasn’t he supposed to be a Nobody? Why didn’t he vanish after his defeat like all the other Nobodies did? Made no sense.

Saïx—Well, it’s no secret that I hated his “death” and everything else about his characterization in KH3. His whole subplot was USELESS. The whole point of his story was so Lea would have someone to rescue, so his training as a Keyblade wielder paid off. Terra, Aqua, and Ven had each other to go home with. Sora, Riku, and Kairi had each other to go home with. Donald, Goofy, and Mickey had each other to go home with. Isa was Lea’s person to bring home. Lea’s home is NOT Twilight Town. And he’s not going to be hanging out with Roxas and Xion all day.

Lea was supposed to bring Isa back. That means taking the initiative, like he did in KH3D. It was heavily implied that he needed to be saved. Even on the clock tower, Lea said he was dragging him home. Isa was the original person Lea promised to bring back. But…he did nothing of the sort. Lea didn’t bring Isa back OR drag him home. Saïx came to the good side on his own after having a random change of heart for no discernible reason. Lea forgot all about him until he randomly showed up on the clock tower. He wasn’t concerned with bringing him home. His relationship with Lea and his boss fight were treated with almost no seriousness whatsoever. Instead of a fight to the death, Lea casually said he’d clobber him tomorrow, like they were going to have a boxing match or something.

Then he had a “redemption” that was so lazy and poorly planned, it had to happen off-screen. Isa was never meant to have a redemption, so one had to be shoe-horned in, using the secret reports of all things. Obviously Isa was a very low priority in KH3. It also made no sense. If he wanted to atone, why did he become a Seeker of Darkness? Could he not bring back Roxas and Xion AFTER Xehanort was defeated? They weren’t Guardians of Light, so they weren’t needed in the final battle. They didn’t need to come back anyway, but still. It was just done for fanservice. And apparently he fought Lea in the final battle because he was too stubborn and embarrassed to admit that he wanted to “atone”. It was all an act. Everything about Saïx was a total waste of screentime IMO. I’ve never seen a work of fiction give a character such a transparently ill-fitting and contradictory backstory in my entire life. I’m not even being hyperbolic, either.

[vivithefolle]

Proxy by Matilda Bishop Summary: Ron’s role in Harry’s struggle with Voldemort puts unexpected pressure on Bill.

Okay, so this fic has been called one of the best Ron/Harry fics several times, but I never really read more than the first few chapters because of the Bill/Harry thing. I thought it came out of nowhere and made no sense, and the age difference made it all iffy, so I always stopped reading. But after seeing yet another mention of this fic, I decided to just push through and try to read it once more, and I’m so glad I did! (The Bill thing still makes no sense, but it’s not really important to the rest of the story and I decided to just skim their scenes and pretend it had never happened once they stopped seeing each other. And as Harry seemed to forget all about Bill once he realized his feelings for Ron, it’s all good)

The main star of the story is definitely Ron, even though it’s in Harry’s POV. We arrive with Harry to the Burrow, and meet a Ron with serious mood swings, he’s manic one minute and depressed, tired and angry the next, but the manic episodes never last long.  Harry and the Weasleys try to figure out what’s going on, and I don’t want to spoil anything, but the brains from the Department of Mysteries are involved;)

There’s a couple of things in this fic that made me roll my eyes (Hermione has a hair cut, and suddenly everyone think she’s gorgeous is one of them, that she also hits Ron during a tense moment and no one complains is another), but all things considered it’s one of the best Ron fics I’ve ever read. It’s full of mystery and dark magic, but also full of love (both romantic, platonic and familial). And yes, Ron is the main receiver of both.

Vivi’s thoughts: Okay, I just want to thank you profusely for giving me this - even though it’s not complete, boo - because it gave me something I pretty much NEVER find in fic: Ron being comforted, cuddled, protected, Ron’s head in his partner’s lap, Ron’s hair being petted, and all sorts of fluffy things. Gimme more of that vulnerable, heartbreakingly beautiful Ron, please.

All in all you’re right, this fanfic is a great read despite the weirdass Bill/Harry at first that serves absolutely no purpose whatsoever and comes out of nowhere. I mean, okay with Harry having a bit of a crush on Bill before he realizes that Ron is really the one he wants, but for Bill to reciprocite…? Mmmfffnnhh. Luckily, like you said, you can just skip the Bill/Harry scenes and not lose plot-critical info so it’s all good.

Funny enough, I like external PoV when it concerns Ron, because I know what goes on in that kid’s head - low self-esteem, an inferiority complex and depression DON’T give much room for kind thoughts about oneself, believe me. And even though Harry sometimes had thoughts about Ron that made me want to shake him, in the end he waxed enough poetic about Ron for me to calm down. Think I’ll do a lil compilation of my favourite lines after I’m done with this review.

As usual, the Makeover Hermione trope had me cringe, not gonna lie, but luckily she never hooks up with any of the Weasleys during the fic or else I’d really have ground my teeth. And Ginny has Dean Thomas comes to the Burrow for a while, so she’s not heartbroken either. I was a bit angry when Hermione said “it’s a Pureblood thing, I’ll explain it to you” because f**k off Hermione that’s Ron’s role. But it was once so I’ll let it pass. (Geez, my standards for fic are so bloody high, do you see now why I’m insufferable?)

Molly… Molly was really shouty, honestly, and I was kinda disappointed by her characterization? The author had her be super-overbearing and controlling, and while in canon she can sometimes have this behaviour, here it was a bit over-the-top. Ah well.

Now for my favourite lines, those’ll go straight to my “Ron-appreciation folder” (SPOILERS AHEAD, DUH):

Voldemort was inexorably part of his life, but he wasn’t his whole life.  There was school and Quidditch and two best friends, one who needed him badly.  And Harry was determined to help.  After all, Ron meant the world to him.  For years, Ron had backed him up, he’d pulled him out of nightmares and followed him into the all the trouble that came from having a zigzag scar on your head.  Sure, Ron had been the world’s biggest prat about the Tri-Wizard Tournament, but Harry had treated him like shit for most of their fifth year.  So they were even.  All in all, Ron, along with Hermione, had been the best friend a bloke could ask for, and he’d been the person who’d given him the family he always wanted.  A surrogate mother and father, a messy jumble of brothers, a spunky little sister, a place to think of as home…

I think the entire goddamn Harry Potter fandom should be reminded of this daily honestly

Harry returned to the living room feeling better.  Bill glanced up in concern and Harry felt his face burn.  He tried to smile to let Bill know he was okay, but really he wasn’t sure what his face was doing.   Ron was back in his chair, having started a new game with Bill.  The chess pieces seemed to be complaining to him about Harry’s performance. “Aw, give him a break, you gits,” Ron snarled.  “His game is Quidditch.”

Oh my god what a cutie *melts*

Hermione looked determined and Harry felt sorry for Ron.  He knew how relentless Hermione could be.

“Promise me you won’t hold Ron’s feet in the fire,” he said.  “Go a little gentle on him, okay?”

Hermione seemed surprised.  “Are you saying I’m hard, Harry?”

“Hermione,” Harry said.  “You’re wonderfully gentle with people like Neville, but with Ron, you’re about as gentle as a blast-ended Skrewt.”

“Oh, all right, Harry,” said Hermione, turning pink.  “But Ron is so thick sometimes, he has the emotional range of a…”

“Not anymore, Hermione,” Harry said firmly.

YES YOU GO HARRY BREAK THOSE DELUSIONS OF HERS

Bemused, he watched Ron, disheveled, half-dressed, slip and slide clumsily on the comics strewn across the floor as he made his way over to his dresser.  There’s something terribly sweet and vulnerable about him, Harry thought.

Yeeeesssss that’s our Ron <3<3<3

He levered up slightly on one elbow.  Ron’s mouth was inches from his.  He dipped his head and pressed his lips against Ron’s, a long gentle kiss on Ron’s full and cushiony mouth.

Ron’s eyes fluttered.  They popped open.

Harry blinked.  Bloody hell, he thought.  Just like Sleeping Beauty.  I kissed him and he woke up just like Sleeping Beauty!  Fuck me, I’m Prince Charming!

Funnily enough I’ve read a one-shot like that once BUT I WOULDN’T MIND SOME MORE OF THAT AU, CAN I PLEASE HAVE MORE

Just look at him, he thought, sliding his hand from Ron’s face to his hair.  At the bright bright hair…at the freckles that make him look like a kid.   At the way his top lip curves and the bottom one pouts.  Has it really taken me five years to see him?  See how… perfect he is?

Believe me Harry some people still haven’t realized it twenty years down the road, I’m as baffled as you are

In fact, Harry had been dreaming.  On the bonnet of the [Ford Anglia] next to Ron, as happy as he’d ever been, he’d been idly planning their future.  We’ll live in the car, he’d decided. I love it that much. We’ll have to engorge the inside, of course, at least the back seat… like a wizard’s tent. We’ll put a four poster back there, a big cozy one with poufy pillows. There’ll be a lounge with a fireplace too, and a kitchen and bath and we’ll magick the whole business to fly again. Sometimes we’ll sit up front and fly wherever we want, stop when we see a likely place. A beach or a meadow or a forest where no one has ever been before. Other times we’ll sleep or make love in the bed while the car flies and the wind and the clouds stream in through the open windows. I’ll hold Ron on top of me and watch his face as his body slides over mine. He’ll lift his eyes to meet mine; I’ll lick the sweat from his jaw and the muscles in his arms and shoulders will roll. He’ll throw his head back for me and I’ll see the moon pass through his hair.

God Harry’s life plans are such a mood, I’m so jealous

Welp, that’s it folks, thank you again so much Anon for recommending that fic to me! <3

[zuckarr]

CHARACTER STUDY:    yoichi saotome, aka the gentle soldier

—    BASICS.

▸     IS  YOUR  MUSE  TALL      /       SHORT       /      AVERAGE?     Yoichi, being a teenager guy, is a little shorter than average, but I still wouldn’t consider him short — besides, he might get taller.

▸      ARE  THEY  OKAY  WITH  THEIR  HEIGHT?            I think he is. It doesn’t look like a problem for someone who can jump all the way up to a roof, or can climb a lamp post, anyway.

▸      WHAT’S  THEIR  HAIR  LIKE?            FLUFFY. A little curly, particularly at the ends. We have no canon info, as far as I know, about his hair being thick or thin, but it certainly looks voluminous and extra soft. As for hair colour, Yoichi was originally colored with black hair (see picture below) but it was changed to brown/golden brown due to resemblance with Yuuichirou’s. I’m personally still fond of the idea of Yoichi being black-haired, though.

▸     DO  THEY  SPEND  A  LOT  OF  TIME  ON  THEIR  HAIR       /      GROOMING?           No canon info whatsoever about this, but I gladly headcanon him as someone who tries to take care of his looks and fails, optimistically exclaiming “whelp! good enough!”

▸      DOES  YOUR  MUSE  CARE  ABOUT  THEIR  APPEARANCE      /      WHAT  OTHERS  THINK?        He did care about what others think of his appearance, I suppose. But he’s definitely over the influence of people’s opinions now (he was always tough like that, he just needed to snap out of it). He definitely cares that his family finds him likeable, so I’m guessing he just tries his best with taking care of himself.

—    PREFERENCES.

▸      INDOORS  OR  OUTDOORS? probably anywhere is fine as long as his family’s with him. ▸      RAIN  OR  SUNSHINE? sunshine! ▸      FOREST  OR  BEACH? Imma go with forest! he looks like somebody who would like hiking and climbing trees, other than enjoy the rare sights of wild animals. ▸      PRECIOUS  METALS  OR  GEMS? I suppose gems, because they’d remind him of eye colors of beloved ones. ▸      FLOWERS  OR  PERFUMES? flowers! he’s shown in the middle of a sunflower field with Tomoe (see pic below), therefore I like to think he lived nearby flowery areas before the apocalypse.

▸      PERSONALITY  OR  APPEARANCE? personality. ▸     BEING  ALONE  OR  BEING  IN  A  CROWD? being amongst loved ones! ▸     ORDER  OR  ANARCHY? middle ground, I assume?  ▸      PAINFUL  TRUTHS  OR  WHITE  LIES? painful truths, possibly said in a kind way tho. ▸      SCIENCE    OR    MAGIC? magic! it’s all around him, even his weapon is magical! ▸      PEACE  OR  CONFLICT? PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE OH MY GOD PEACE ALL THE WAY ▸      NIGHT  OR  DAY? day! ▸      DUSK  OR  DAWN? dawn! ▸      WARMTH  OR  COLD? warmth duh, let him hug you till you choke ▸      MANY  ACQUAINTANCES  OR  A  FEW  CLOSE  FRIENDS? few close friends. I doubt Yoichi would be comfortable with people he’s not close with. ▸     READING  OR  PLAYING  A  GAME? uh, he’s young, he would probably prefer playing games!

—    QUESTIONNAIRE.

▸      WHAT  ARE  SOME  OF  YOUR  MUSE’S  BAD  HABITS?             Yoichi tends to get anxious, which leads him to turn to the pessimistic side of things. I don’t blame him, he lives in a world where he could die or lose someone close to him any moment, so who wouldn’t be *at least* a little anxious. Also, sometimes Yoichi thinks too naively, and he wishes for things that are just unrealistic (f.e. no one can “get along” as easily as Yoichi makes it sound like).

▸      HAS  YOUR  MUSE  LOST  ANYONE  CLOSE  TO  THEM?      HOW  HAS  IT    AFFECTED  THEM?            yes, Yoichi lost his parents and his big sister. particularly the death of his sister affected him drastically, to the point he began blaming himself for not being able to save her; he most likely also thought he should’ve died with her, and he attempted to find meaning in his life by seeking revenge, until he met Yuu. I think such loss caused most of his insecurity and anxiety, other than having led him to a very lonely school life (he didn’t have any friends before meeting Yuu and Shinoa) and general feeling of hopelessness (which he admits later on, with Gekkoin, by saying he was “desperate” and “miserable”).

▸      WHAT  ARE  SOME  FOND  MEMORIES  YOUR  MUSE  HAS?               he probably tries to hold on to any memory he can recall from childhood, but he also really wants to make new ones with his friends — in the PS vita game, he’s seen happily taking a photo of an embarrassed Kimizuki.

▸     IS  IT  EASY  FOR  YOUR  MUSE  TO  KILL?              it depends on who he attempts to kill. if it’s enemies, I don’t think he has any problems. I’m pretty sure he killed many vampires, if that even counts as “dying”. but he probably wouldn’t kill any human, or any demon (I doubt he could, but still), if you ask me.

▸      WHAT’S  IT  LIKE  WHEN  YOUR  MUSE  BREAKS  DOWN?               giving in to the demon is not an option for any demonic weapon wielder. he just can’t, but if he ever does, I think it depends on what exactly causes him to have a breakdown. if he finds himself confronting Lacus, for example, he would most likely go berserk, because he would be both scared and furious, a dangerous mix. if one of his comrades dies, he would panic and scream. if an unexpected situation happens (like a betrayal) he would be baffled and petrified. it really depends!

▸      IS  YOUR  MUSE  CAPABLE  OF  TRUSTING  SOMEONE  WITH  THEIR  LIFE?           yes, totally.

▸      WHAT’S  YOUR  MUSE  LIKE  WHEN  THEY’RE  IN  LOVE?              I think Yoichi would be many things in love, haha! he would be a little clingy, very attentive, sweet and extra nice. he would also be insecure, shy and devoted. personally, I believe he would be needy and also a little lustful, after having discovered how warm and intimate sex feels. he would be respectful, more excitable, and adventurous. he would find so much inspiration in his partner, and of course, he would be altruist and helpful, as much as he can. Yoichi would be happy if he ever falls in love, because he knows he can’t afford to, not in a world like that.

TAGGING TIME! @thefifthprogenitor (give us that sweet Ky Luc content, senpai) @lacusthebae (I can’t wait to read stuff about your muse~) @icyghostllama (we all need Yuu!) @yuichiroswife (I hope doing this will help your writer’s block, friend!) @namanari (please do this with Guren, if you want to!) I hope you guys have fun!!

[minijenn]

Water Pines: Dead in the Water (Part 1)

AHAHAHAH OH FUCK THE ANGST TRAIN IS HERE And yeah lemme just warn ya’ll that this one? Is fucking ANGSTY and SAD as fuck. So... if ya aint into that you probably won’t like this one cause there’s like, no fluff to be found here whatsoever. But yeah anyway, for those of you who don’t remember what Water Pines AU is all about cause we never talk about it around here anymore, its basically the AU where Dipper makes an ill-informed deal with Bill that results in him literally switching places with Lapis, so he gets turned into a gem and stuck with Jasper while Lapis is freed and turned into a human. Imo if you need more info on it (and wanna see some art I drew up for it way back when) feel free to check this out. And finally, I should inform you that this is a two parter and idk when I’ll actually get around to writing part 2 but I got burnt out trying to make it one part so yah, basically what ya see is what ya get until I eventually write the second part. And so with that stupidly long explaination outta the way, let’s get onto the PAIN! 

Dead in the Water (Part 1) 

“Ya know, Pine Tree,” Bill casually continued his appeal, an appeal that Dipper had no intentions of taking seriously, though out of morbid curiosity, he halfheartedly listened nonetheless as he watched the laptop continue to steadily tick down. “What happened to Water Wings is just plain tragic, it really is. I mean, just think about it: she’s locked down there at the bottom of that grimy lake, having just a grand old time duking it out with Stripes and spending every waking moment in an endless sea of misery and torment and its all—your—fault!”

“Don’t remind me…” Dipper muttered despondently, guiltily glancing over at the pile of photos of him and Lapis. Reminders of peaceful, happy times that only existed in the distant past now, times that certainly would never come to be ever again. Unless…

“But as ‘sad’ as it all is, kid, I could fix it all up for you, nice and easy!” Bill quipped, his tone as bright and deceptively cheery as ever. “And luckily for you, I’m willing to let you off by only asking for something small in return; in fact, you won’t even notice the difference!”

“You still haven’t bothered to tell me what that ‘something’ is, by the way,” Dipper remarked, sending the dream demon a distrustful glare.

“Huh, guess you do have a point there,” Bill shrugged. “Alrighty then, what I want from you, Pine Tree, is something sooooo easy that I’m sure you won’t even have time to think twice about it once the deal is sealed! And that something is… drumroll please!” At this, the demon snapped his fingers, materializing a self-rolling snare drum out of thin air before making his supposedly daunting proclamation, which ended up being not so apparently daunting at all. “I want you to stay out of my way!”

“Wait… what?” Dipper asked, largely caught off guard by this confusing request.

“You heard me, kid!” Bill said succinctly. “All your ‘mystery hunting’ this summer has gotten you way to close to some answers that you shouldn’t be finding, cause if you did, it’d just about ruin everything I’ve been planning for centuries now. But instead of coming up with some sort of cockamamie scheme to, oh, I don’t know, hijack your body and use it to destroy that journal of yours before flinging your empty skin off the water tower or some hypothetical screwball plan like that, I decided I’d save a whole lot of time and effort by cutting this problem off at the source! So all I’m really asking here is for you to put the breaks on all your little investigations and let me have my fun. See? I told you it was something simple!”

“Hold it so… you… just want me to stop looking into the mysteries of Gravity Falls?” Dipper frowned, still bewildered by how straightforward this all seemed. “And that’s… it?”

“Well, that’s mostly it,” Bill shrugged nonchalantly. “There’s… another small little tidbit in this contract too, something that’ll make sure you keep up your end of the bargain.”

“And… that something is…?”

“Aw, come on, Pine Tree, you don’t want me ruining all my surprises, do you?” Bill asked coyly. “Let’s just say you can expect a bit of a… change, but I’m sure you’ll get used to it eventually! Plus… at this point its just about your only sure-fire way to dredge poor Water Wings up out of both that fusion and that lake. After all, you don’t even know if that dusty old laptop over there could even help anything at all, so why not go with the safer route? I’m sure if she were in your place, Water Wings would do the same thing for you—oh wait! She basically already did by trapping herself down there with Stripes. Don’t you think its about time you returned the favor, kid?”

It was, it really was, and this was something Dipper had felt from the very moment he realized that Lapis would be trapped in that lake possibly forever if nothing was done to rescue her. And up until now, that was an effort he hadn’t found too much hope in, his spirits dropping every time he so much as thought of the blue Gem, struggling and suffering all because of her clear, devoted dedication to him. Dedication that Dipper largely felt undeserving of, for he knew he hadn’t really demonstrated it towards her in return. And yet… now he could, in such a simple, easy way too. True, he loved investigating the boundless, incredible wonders to be found in Gravity Falls, and he knew with every one he uncovered, he drew closer to unraveling the entire mystery that was the town and its baffling strangeness. But at the same time, Lapis had become one of the best and closest friends he had ever come to know in the short time that they had together. Her sacrifice for him alone was proof enough of that. And it was a sacrifice that Dipper felt more than ready to honor by making one of his own, if only it meant that they could finally be together in safety, happiness, and freedom once more.

And so, that’s exactly what he did.

Dipper saw no point in exchanging any more deliberation on the matter as he watched Bill extend a hand out in offering, unnatural blue flames sparking around it. He hesitated, only briefly, upon remembering the dream demon’s warning that there was another element to this purposed deal, but from how he had made it sound, it didn’t seem like it was anything too drastic or important. And even if it was, then certainly liberating Lapis from her longtime prison would make whatever that unknown addendum was worth it.

Right?

“So, Pine Tree? Do we have a deal?” Bill asked almost goadingly, calm in the assurance that he had his young, unwitting pawn right where he wanted him.

Keeping his manner steady and resolved, Dipper only nodded, taking in a deep breath before he carefully met the demon’s hand and shook it, solidifying their bargain once and for all. “Alright, fine,” Dipper said sternly as he looked to Bill rather coldly. “No more mystery hunting. Now fulfill your end of the deal and save Lapis.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Pine Tree, I already got that one covered!” Bill exclaimed with a mischievous chuckle as the flame encompassing both their hands suddenly grew brighter. “But in the meantime, there’s still the matter of the other half of your end of things…”

“M-my… wha-” Dipper barely had any time to get anything out before his voice caught in a startled gasp, his eyes growing wide and his body still and rigid as he felt a sharp pain course through it. In fact, so great was this pain that it ended up completely incapacitating him, to the point that he couldn’t even cry out for help or for a release from it. In a way, it almost felt like all of his cells were violently tearing apart, or better yet, that they were burning, glowing even, but in the worst way possible. Amidst this torrent of unstoppable agony, he hadn’t even registered the dream demon’s incredibly amused and sadistic laughter ringing in his deafening ears, nor did he notice the pale white light ripping away at every part of him, effectively disintegrating him until there was nothing left at all. His consciousness was the last thing to fade away, but before it did, the last thing he heard was the triumphant teasing of the demon who had so easily tricked him with a promise that had ended up resulting in what must have been his own complete and utter destruction.

“See ya, Pine Tree! Hope you enjoy your new digs! Oh, and be sure to send Stripes my best! I’m sure she’s just gonna love to see you!”

The very first thing Lapis felt before awakening was a stark, sudden beating inside her own chest. In fact, the sensation was so strange and alarming that it only seemed to quicken, to the point that it ultimately ended up tearing her right back into consciousness. She let out a gasp, her eyes opening wide as she felt the air fill in another part of her chest, the beating continuing rapidly as she found herself in need of even more air, which she took in heavily as she tried to make sense of what was happening to her.

Despite her effective hyperventilating, Lapis was able to focus enough to notice that whatever surface she was lying on wasn’t anything remotely similar to the darkened, drenched, despair of Malachite’s mindscape that she had grown so accustomed to over the past several weeks. Instead, the surface below her was hard yet warm, crisp, red light pouring in from an unseen source and illuminating a wooden ceiling above her. Disconcerted, Lapis slowly began to pick herself up to get a better look around, though she stopped short upon catching a glance of her arm. Her pale, fleshy, not blue arm.

“Augh!” Lapis cried, grasping her wrist as she glanced over the rest of her form. The usual blue coloration of her dress was apparently no more, replaced by a mix of navy, orange, and grey, and upon pulling a lock forward, she found that her hair had somehow turned a shade of chestnut brown. “W-what… what is this?” she muttered to herself, her brow furrowing as her breathing and the beating in her chest gradually slowed to a normal, natural tempo.

She didn’t have too much of a chance to wonder what had happened or where she was, however, before she noticed something lying on the ground right beside her: a blue and white hat with a tell-tale print of a pine tree on it. An article Lapis immediately recognized, to the point that even picking it up and holding it close made her ache with both regret and with a curious sense of hope as she took another look around.

“D-Dipper?” she ventured, her voice small at first, especially as she failed to find the boy anywhere in the immediate vicinity. “Dipper, a-are you here?” she asked again, feebly rising to stand only to find herself strangely unsteady. All the same, she clung onto the hat, a spark of terror and dread filling her as she realized this place, whatever it was, was surprisingly bereft of Jasper. Regardless to the bizarre alteration of her form, certainly she had to still be part of Malachite, which meant that her orange adversary couldn’t be too far, right?

Lapis shook her head, steadying herself as her expression filled with resolve. If she was indeed still Malachite, and if Dipper, of all people, had managed to find his way into their incredibly toxic mindscape, then she knew her mission, above all else, had to be to protect him from Jasper’s wrath and bring him back to safety. Which meant that her starting step in doing so had to be finding him first.

And so Lapis picked herself up off the ground, her footing initially unsteady as she had to get used to being solely in control of her own form once more. Even so, she wasted no time in checking just about every single nook and cranny the room had to offer for any further sign of Dipper’s presence there, only to find none at all. As a result, an even deeper sense of worry filled her, one that was more than enough to prompt her to set out beyond the boundaries of the room to check elsewhere in the hopes of finally reuniting with him if nothing else. However, as she tentatively opened the door, she ended up reuniting with someone else entirely.

“S-Steven?!” Lapis gasped, her eyes wide as she caught sight of the young Gem standing right outside the door.

Startled, Steven gaped back up at her, his hand held up ready to knock on the now-opened door as he tried to make sense of exactly who was standing before him. “Uh… do I know you?”

“Of course you do!” Lapis exclaimed as though it was obvious, despite her new appearance. “It’s me: Lapis!”

“L-Lapis?!” Steven’s jaw practically hit the floor as everything connected for him, but sure enough, it did make sense. Save for her oddly familiar but markedly different coloration, the woman before him looked exactly like the blue Gem who had trapped herself at the bottom of the lake several weeks ago. “Wha—I don’t understand; how did you even get here?! When did you and Jasper unfuse? And… and why do you look so different?”

“Wait, wait, hold on, what?” Lapis shook her head, her eyes wide with surprise. “I… I’m not fused with Jasper anymore? But… but I thought…”

“Well… I’m pretty sure you’re not since you’re here,” Steven pointed out. “But what I wanna know is why you look like that. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were a human!”

“A human?” Lapis scoffed, crossing her arms. “Don’t be silly, Steven. I may not know how I got separated from Jasper or why I look like this, but if there’s one thing I do know, its that I’m still a Gem. See?”

At this, she turned around to show the young Gem the stone on her back, only for Steven to let out a stunned gasp at what he actually saw there. “L-Lapis…” he muttered, clearly shocked. “Your Gem… it… it’s gone!”

“What?!” Lapis frantically reached both of her hands to her back, feeling around desperately for her familiar teardrop-shaped gemstone, only to feel nothing but smooth, warm skin where it should have been. “H-how… what happened to it?! Where did it go, I-” She stopped short with a gasp, her eyes widening even more in a dawning, almost sickening form of realization. “N-no way…” she whispered, absolutely shaken by this revelation as she pressed her hand against her chest, only to feel what could only be a heart hammering away underneath it. “I-it can’t be… I… S-Steven… I think I really am a human…”

“B-but… how did you just turn into a human like this?!” Steven asked, just as frantic as Lapis was over this alarming news.

“I don’t know!” she exclaimed, running a hand through her now brown hair. “One minute, I was keeping Malachite chained to the bottom of the lake, and then the next I woke up here and found-” Lapis interupted herself once more, remembering that she had much more important things to worry about aside from her shift in species as she glanced down at the hat still tightly trapped in her grip. “Dipper…” she whispered before hastily placing a firm hand on the young Gem’s shoulder. “Steven, where’s Dipper?”

“Wait, you mean he’s not in there?” Steven frowned, glancing past Lapis and into the otherwise empty attic. “That’s weird… Mabel sent me up here to find him, so… maybe he’s in another part of the shack? He’s been working really hard lately to try and find a way to save you, so I’m sure he’ll be really happy to see you!”

“H-he’s been trying to…” Lapis trailed off, letting out a sad sigh as she held the hat close to her chest. “Oh, Dipper…”

“H-hey, I’m sure once we find him, he’ll be able to help us figure out exactly what happened to you,” Steven reassured upon noticing Lapis’ obvious melancholy.

“R-right…” Lapis nodded in absent agreement, following after the young Gem as he led her through the rest of the shack. The two searched diligently for Dipper, with Steven claiming that it only made sense that he’d be somewhere in the building since that was the last place he had been seen heading to. And yet, despite their best efforts, neither of them managed to find him inside the shack whatsoever, leaving Lapis in a rather distraught state as she was filled with both dread over her new form as well as over Dipper’s whereabouts, which by all accounts, seemed to be completely unknown.

With their search of the shack completely exhausted, Steven and Lapis agreed to check outside for Dipper, just in case he had ended up slipping out of the house without anyone noticing somehow. And yet, instead of finding him, they managed to run smack dab into his twin instead as she was heading into the house carry a high-piled basket of sock puppet supplies, which was easily knocked out of her hands the moment her and Lapis accidentally collided.

“Hey!” Mabel huffed, disgruntled as sock and craft supplies spilled all over the floor. “Steven! What’s the big… idea…?” She trailed off, her jaw dropping as she watched the familiar figure beside the young Gem start to pick herself up off the ground to stand once more. At first, Mabel thought she was seeing things, because certainly there was no logical way she could be here like this; but sure enough, it seemed to be true, as completely unbelievable as it seemed.

“No way…” she muttered in amazement as she stared at the former Gem, her mouth gaped in awe. “Lapis?!”

“H-hey, Mabel,” Lapis greeted, offering the girl as much of a smile as she could, though it was clear her primary concern was still with finding Dipper. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“It sure as heck has!” Mabel exclaimed, still completely awestruck. “How are you even here? And how are you all humany? And most importantly, does Dipper know? Cause if when he sees you he’s gonna freak out. I’m not even kidding, he’s been driving himself crazy looking for a way to save you and-”

“I-I know,” Lapis interjected, glancing down somewhat remorsefully upon hearing this. “Steven already filled me in. But we are looking for Dipper, if you’ve seen him anywhere.”

“Not since we-” Mabel quickly cut herself off, a worried look crossing her expressions as she looked down to the scattered sock puppets on the ground below and remembered the rather harsh words her and her brother had just exchanged only just a few moments prior. Words that, in light of Lapis’ sudden, unexpected, but still miraculous reappearance, seemed incredibly petty now, especially on her end of things. “Uh… never mind,” she said quickly, pushing several of the sock puppets away with her foot as she dropped her basket. “W-why don’t I help you guys look for him? Three heads are always better than two after all.”

“Are you sure, Mabel?” Steven asked with a frown. “I mean, your puppet show’s coming up really soon and you still have a lot to do to get ready for-”

“Eh, the show can wait for a sec,” Mabel interupted with a somewhat forced wave of her hand. “After all, I… I…” she trailed off, not particularly wanting to bring her bitter argument with Dipper up in front of Lapis, especially since said argument had largely centered around the former Gem in the first place. “I really wanna see the look on Dipper’s face when he sees you again, Lapis!” she intercepted, being both truthful and dodgy all at the same time. “Now come on, let’s go find him!”

“Right,” Lapis nodded firmly, crouching down a bit, almost as if she was anticipating something. Steven and Mabel looked to her in confusion when nothing did end up happening, something that confused the former Gem even more, until she stole a glance behind her and let out a startled gasp. “M-my wings!” she cried, distraught as she stood properly. “W-why can’t I summon my wings!?”

“Uh… probably because you don’t have a Gem anymore,” Steven informed gently. “Humans can’t fly, Lapis. Well, at least not using water, that is.”

Lapis shook her head in disbelief at this, grief filling her expression over the loss of something she had always treasured so much. Her wings provided her with freedom, with a chance to escape to safety in an instant if the need arose. But now, they were gone and she was tethered to the ground, anchored almost just as much as she had been with Jasper at the bottom of the lake. The only difference now was that she was at the very least, no longer trapped within a prison of her own design with a cellmate she would have just as rather shattered than let survive. All the same, her lack of wings only added onto the several disconcerting discoveries she had made since awakening in her new human body. A worrisome change that she hoped could at the very least be eased upon finding the one she had given almost everything up for until now.

Since searching by air was out of the question, the trio split up, investigating the immediate woods around the shack on foot. Though Lapis was unfamiliar with the area, Steven and Mabel made an effort to venture out a bit further, their own respective concern for Dipper starting to rise upon catching not a single sign of him anywhere. From there, they decided to check in up at the temple, Lapis keeping her distance outside as the kids asked if any of the Gems had seen Dipper around, only for all three of them to offer sympathetic no’s. It was only after they decided to join in on the search themselves that they discovered Lapis and her now human condition, something that aptly shocked all three of them, though the former Gem had no interest in garnishing any help from them, except for when it came to looking for Dipper. As minutes turned into hours, Mabel decided to make a tough call and postpone her puppet show, knowing that, for the first time all week Gabe Bensen could wait; her brother was, by all accounts, apparently missing. And after putting him on hold all week for her own selfish pursuits, she wasn’t about to rest until she made things right, found him, and apologized for the lack of support she should have been providing him with all along.

As the sun began to sink across the forest, the Gems insisted that the kids finally check in with Stan, all of them hoping that he at the very least had some sort of clue as to where Dipper had run off to. The conman however, was simply quite surprised to hear that his nephew was missing alone, making it quite obvious that he was just as clueless as everyone else. After calling up Soos and Wendy, a rather sizable search party had been formed, one that forged on late into the night and stretched as far as the town boarders itself. And yet, despite their collective, valiant efforts, Dipper never seemed to show up anywhere, much to everyone’s immensely growing concern. It truth, it seemed as though he had disappeared completely out of nowhere, leaving only his hat behind, which Lapis hadn’t let go of since the moment she found it in the shack’s attic. Speaking of the former Gem, what struck most of the others as odd was that her sudden appearance seemed to perfectly coincide with Dipper’s abrupt disappearance. There was no question the two events were connected, but as to how and why, no one had the slightest clue. Even Garnet, with her future vision and all, was unable to foresee them locating the missing boy anytime soon. Still, that didn’t mean they were going to give up hope so easily; Lapis and Mabel in particular were both insistent on continuing the search until Dipper was found and brought home, safe and sound.

And yet in the midst of foraging through the darkened forest in the very late hours of the night, Lapis soon discovered another aspect of humanity that she had previously never experienced before: exhaustion. With each passing moment, it seemed as though her pace grew slower, her eyes grew heavier and her focus drifted away altogether, to the point that at one point she almost tripped over Steven, who was every bit as tired as she was. Upon realizing this and detecting the same sort of fatigue from Stan, Mabel, Soos, and Wendy, the Gems concluded that they would continue looking for Dipper while all of the humans headed home to bed so that they could be better rested up to help in the search tomorrow. Of course, there were protests all around concerning this as all of them did indeed want to find Dipper as soon as possible, but once Garnet put her foot down on the matter, there was no arguing with her about it.

And so everyone save for the Gems headed home for the night, their hearts equally heavy with worry and dread. After a healthy round of convincing and bribing Stan on Mabel’s part, Lapis was allotted to stay at the shack, with Steven sleeping over as well since the Gems would be out for the rest of the night. Together, the pair fashioned a makeshift air mattress bed for the former Gem to sleep on, though all the same she still really wasn’t quite familiar with the process of “sleeping” to begin with. Being a human was, at least from her perspective, a rather odd experience as a whole. Only just a few hours ago did she “eat” for the first time, with her first meal consisting of something Steven called “the bits” that he got from Gravity Fries downtown while they were searching around there. To Lapis’ surprise, she actually enjoyed the snack quite a bit, though she was somewhat anxious when Steven and Mabel informed her that eating was something she’d have to do regularly now that she was a human.

In fact, the reality that she was no longer a Gem but rather a human on its own was enough to keep her lying awake in bed even after Steven and Mabel had already fallen asleep. In the full moonlight streaming into the attic room, Lapis stared at her hand—her now flesh-covered, pale, human hand—as she let her thoughts wander. How did something like this even happen? How had she been torn away from Jasper and put here, of all places? How long was she going to stay like this? Was it ever possible for her to return to her original form? And most importantly, the question that had been largely plaguing her all day, even about her own concerns about herself: where could Dipper have gone to? The former Gem couldn’t deny that her now human heart ached whenever she thought of the mysteriously missing boy, the boy who, even during her own self imposed imprisonment in the lake, she had missed so very much each and every day. Lapis couldn’t deny that she wanted to see him, probably even more than she wanted to be a Gem once again. As far as she was concerned, thoughts of anything else other than finding him and bringing him home could wait. To know that he was safe and sound and where he belonged would be more than enough to set her worried mind at ease. Which was why, as she slowly drifted off into her first fitful, fretful slumber, the last thing on the former Gem’s mind was the warm reassurance Steven had offered both her and Mabel just a few hours prior. A reassurance she hoped more than anything would come true:

“Don’t worry! I’m sure we’ll end up finding Dipper tomorrow!”

Except they didn’t. They didn’t find him then, or the next day, or even anytime in the days or weeks after that.

And when they finally did find him, he was in the last place any of them had ever thought to look.

Earlier…

A flash of blinding light sparked from the depths of Lake Gravity Falls, completely filling its empty surface, though no one was around to see it. Likewise, no one was around to see the tiny, squarish blue stone drop into its murky waters from seemingly out of nowhere, sinking lower and lower, down towards the bottom of the deep lake on its own accord. For a moment or two, fish occasionally flocked to it, investigating the odd, dully shimmering gem until, out of nowhere, light began to explode from it, scaring the sealife away as a small humanoid shape began to form around it. The light took on a bright blue pigment as it began to define its previously amorphous form, with clothes and features taking shape as the gemstone found its place upon its forehead. And, with another flash of solidifying light, the radiant glow disappeared, once again sending the lake depths in obscuring darkness and leaving a small, singular figure floating in its place.

Upon regaining some sense of cognizance and feeling, the very first thing Dipper did was abruptly open his eyes, taking in a sharp gasp the moment he did, only to inhale a large mouthful of water instead of air. As panicked and disoriented as he already was, his first instinct was to panic at the thought of drowning, flailing about as he floated just above the lakebed, neither rising towards the top nor sinking to the bottom all the while. It was only as he unintentionally ended up taking in more water that he noticed something both relieving and alarming; he wasn’t drowning. In fact, it seemed as though he was somehow able to breathe within the water just as easily as he could breathe air.

“W-what the…?” Dipper trailed off, whispering to himself as he began to curiously touch his throat only to stop short upon stealing a glance at his hand. For a brief moment, he thought it was simply a trick of the incredibly low light surrounding him on all sides, but upon a second glance, he realized that his hand was indeed somehow strangely blue as opposed to its normal pale pigmentation. He was quick to discover that everything else about him was some varying shade of deep blue too: from his skin, to his clothes, to his shoes, to even his hair as it covered what he found to be the most disconcerting of all: his birthmark. While it was usually mostly unnoticeable considering he kept it concealed so well, Dipper couldn’t hold back a soft gasp of surprise as he realized he could actually feel the copy of the constellation on his forehead, smooth and solid and almost… stone-like to the touch.

For a moment, Dipper took pause, his hand floating away from his birthmark as he tried to make sense of exactly where he was and what was going on. Surrounding him all around seemed to be a vast aquatic void, with only the occasional deepwater fish, plant, or sunken canoe to be spotted anywhere nearby. With nothing visual to go off of, the most Dipper could do was think back to how he might have ended up in a place like this when, as far as he knew, he had just been in the shack’s attic just a few minutes prior. The last thing he remembered was his own exhaustion amidst his endless attempts at trying to decode the laptop’s password, but that was it. He couldn’t recall falling sleep, which meant that there really wasn’t any chance of this being some sort of dream. Even so, he couldn’t help but feel as though he was missing an important piece here, a piece that, if he ended up actually remembering it somehow, could quite possibly explain both his unknown location and his bewildering condition at the same exact time.

However, instead of finding that missing piece, he soon found something, or rather someone else entirely. Or rather, they found him.

“YOU!” The outraged shout boomed across the lakebed, scaring off any fish that was even remotely in the vicinity. Dipper, on the other hand, froze up completely, his eyes going wide as the massive shadow of a Gem he had hoped to never encounter again fell upon him. Yet before he could fearfully spin around to face the vicious warrior, she did the job for him, unexpectedly grabbing him by the arm and wrenching him around roughly. Dipper had only a moment to register the thought that such a maneuver could have easy broken his arm entirely as he glanced up and shuddered with unconcealed alarm at the fact that he was now somehow face to face with none other than Jasper herself. “I know you,” the orange Gem growled, scowling fiercely at him all the while. “You’re her favorite little human pet, the one she wouldn’t stop thinking about while she kept me chained down here! So why are you here? And where is she?!”

“W-who?” Dipper dared to venture, his voice much smaller and more frightened than he had hoped it to be. “Lapis?”

“Who else?!” Jasper snapped hotly, her already inescapable grip on his wrist tightening. “Up until a few minutes ago the two of us were fused, just like we’ve been for weeks now. And then all of the sudden you show up and she disappears! What’s going on here?!”

“I-I don’t know!” Dipper answered truthfully, confused just as much as he was terrified. In fact he was so disoriented that he barely even registered an essential part of what Jasper had just said, namely that her and Lapis had been fused. Which meant that, even though it was really beyond all sense of logic, they weren’t fused anymore. “I was just-”

“Quiet!” the orange Gem barked harshly, giving the unfortunate boy in her grip a violent shake. “I don’t know where she thinks she gets off, just running off after everything she did and leaving you behind to-” Jasper cut herself off, her confusion with the unfolding situation seeming to grow as she noticed something that only seemed to anger and disgust her even more. “What is that?”

“W-what?” Dipper tried to glance up at whatever it was Jasper was pointing at, only to find that she was oddly referring to him. Or rather, to his forehead.

For a moment, Jasper didn’t answer, opting to finally relinquish her tight hold on Dipper’s arm only to suddenly grasp his chin instead, still effectively holding him in place as she swept a bit of his hair up to find something that made her gasp in clear shock as she finally let go of him altogether. “You’re not a human!” she exclaimed, obviously baffled as she continued sending him the same bitter glare as before. “You’re a Gem!”

“Wha—no, I’m not!” Dipper countered, though he still lifted a curious hand up to his now tangible birthmark, wondering if Jasper might have somehow confused that for a gemstone somehow. But then again, his now oddly blue coloration, his strange, newfound ability to breathe underwater… both of these things seemed to speak to the contrary. Which in and of itself was an alarming possibility he didn’t even have time to think about as Jasper continued, apparently growing even more incensed by the second.

“I get it now…” the orange Gem growled coldly. “The little game you and her have been playing… the reason why she wanted to protect you so badly that she decided to trap me… You’re a Lapis Lazuli, just like her!”

“N-no!” Dipper tried to protest, knowing that such a claim was completely preposterous. “I’m-”

“Let me guess…” Jasper continued, her feet firmly planted on the lakebed as she marched closer towards him. While Dipper had the wits about him to wisely float backwards out of her immediate range, he was still largely too engulfed by fear to make a real escape attempt. “You two came out of the same Kindergarten, didn’t you? I know you Lazulis like to travel in flocks. So when she got stuck on this backwards planet, you were the only one of her kind still left around to take care of that mirror she was trapped in. Then, when she flew back here to warn you that we were coming, you tried to hide yourself by shapeshifting into that weak, pathetic form you’re in now, just like Rose did! But it didn’t work, because I’ve got it all figured out now...”

“No, y-you really don’t, trust me,” Dipper tried to clarify, though of course, in her ongoing anger and thirst for vengeance, she was hardly listening to him.

“And… since she took so much from me… and now that I know just how much you really mean to her…” A sly, almost sinister smile crossed the orange Gem’s face as she stood essentially towering over him menacingly. “I think its only fair that I return the favor and take something from her…”

Dipper didn’t even have a chance to ask what she could have meant by this before she suddenly latched onto his arm yet again, wrenching him upward before, surprisingly, spinning him around with almost a flare of what could have been mistaken for grace. She relinquished her hold on him for just the slightest second and in that second, he did all he could to try to swim away, only for her to pull him back down by his ankle before he could really make any progress at all. Once she had him back down, she began swiftly spinning them both around in something that almost seemed like a dance. And it was as Dipper realized this, that he realized with a burst of apt panic exactly what Jasper was trying to do.

“W-wait!” he cried as Jasper’s smug smirk only deepened at his obvious fear. “Don’t-”

“Go ahead and beg all you want, Lazuli,” the orange Gem hissed with a hateful sneer as she suddenly dipped him low, just as she had done with Lapis on the lake shore weeks ago. “I begged too, for weeks on end, in a futile attempt to escape her,” Jasper’s grin only deepened as the gemstone that was in the place of her nose began to take on a bright white glow. “But it never worked; if she had her way, she was going to keep me trapped down here forever. All because of you!” Dipper gasped in growing alarm as the same sort of glow began to pour from his birthmark, or, as he now realized with a sense of sickening shock, his gem. “Well now its your turn to see what that’s like. I hope you enjoy it, because just like she said, I’m never letting you go!”

With this final, fierce proclamation, she roughly pulled him towards her, a blinding light enveloping them both. While Dipper’s past experience with fusion was extremely limited, he knew that both times he had formed Stepper with Steven had felt absolutely nothing like this. With Steven, the act of fusion had felt warm, calming, even welcoming, even if the initial aftermath had been largely tremulous and uneasy. But with Jasper, fusion was anything but those things. It was like she was throwing him into a tight cage and throwing away the key. It was like she was anchoring him, weighing him down to the bottom of an ocean that, even with the ability to breathe underwater, he would surely drown in. It was like—no, it wasn’t like, it was her trapping him, locking him into something he wanted no parts of and desperately wanted to escape.

Which was why, even as the eventual fusion gained its form, it was screaming, half of it crying out for release while the other half simply laughed vindictively. As a result, their sharp-toothed maw split cleanly down the middle as their form solidified, resulting in two mouths, two sets of eyes, and six sets of arms, two of which acted as legs. Most everything about this fusion was monstrous, yet familiar, their coloration a mix of mangled, sickly greens and their build bulky, awkward, and uneven. Their white hair was a wild, untamed mess, their skin markings garish and garbled, and their newly-shared mind a complete and utter disaster as they both were forcibly plunged into its darkened depths.

As for the fusion themselves, they hardly faired much better as they were still caught in a chaotic flux of sadistic satisfaction and horrified anguish over the realization of the awful monster they had become. “Augh! L-let me go!” they screamed through one of their two mouths, their voices mangled together and uneven yet nightmarishly unified all the same. “Not a chance! Not until you see just how much she made me suffer because of you!”

At this unhinged declaration, the fusion, out of sheer desperation alone, reached up to the far off surface of the water far above them, hoping they could somehow breach it and alert someone, anyone to their horrific plight. Unfortunately, before they could even get anywhere close, a sudden chain, composed entirely of water, rushed up from the lakebed, latching onto both of their wrists and keeping them anchored heavily down to the ground itself.

“N-no! Stop! Please!” they begged, not even bothering to hide how outright terrified they were by this seemingly possible, absolutely miserable turn of events. “I-I already told you! I’m not a Gem! Hmph! You really are stupid if you think you can fool me again!” they sneered, yanking the chains back to force them down even more. “If you’re ‘not a Gem’ then how did we just fuse? I-I don’t know! I don’t even know what’s going on! P-please, I just want to—Ha! You really think I care about what you want?! The only thing I care about is making both you and her pay for what you both did to me! B-but I didn’t—QUIET!”

The fusion gasped as an entirely new set of watery manacles suddenly latched around both sets of their feet, pulling them down until they were basically tethered to the lakebed itself with no hope of escape whatsoever. “I’m done listening to what you have to say!” they barked harshly, so caught up in their lust for revenge that they didn’t even place any second thoughts or concerns with the other, absolutely panicking half of their ruinously shared mind as they essentially drowned him in the darkness of their fusion’s hatred altogether. “She might have tried to protect you, but she failed. You both failed! Because from here on out, you’re not a Lapis Lazuli or a human in disguise or anything else anymore.” At this, one of the fusion’s mouths leered into a sickening smirk while the other one quivered in pained whimpers, heartbroken tears starting to well up in two out of their four eyes as they began to sink, quite literally, into their unimaginable fate. “The only thing we are now is Malachite. So get used to it; because as long as I’m around to keep us together, that’s something that’s never going to change.”

The first few days and nights were, simply put, completely unbearable. True to her word, Jasper kept Dipper, and by extension, the newly-recreated Malachite tightly chained to both bottom of the lakebed as well as to the murky, inescapable depths of their now forcibly shared mind. And from the very moment his unexpected, nightmarish imprisonment began, Dipper wanted nothing more than some form of release from it. A release that seemed like it would never end up coming.

In fact, if there was any one word Dipper knew he could use to sum up his still relatively newfound existence as Malachite, then that word would be drowning. Largely because a majority of his time seemed to be spent doing exactly that in just about every sense of the word. He seemed to always in a state of constant drowning; drowning literally in the toxic waters of Malachite’s dark and desolate mindscape, drowning in the mire of hatred of the Gem who had cruelly trapped him in the name of her own vengeance, and drowning most of all in his own crippling, crushing fear that he’d never be able to escape, a fear that only steadily grew the longer it went on for.

In fact, the only times Dipper didn’t feel like he was drowning were the rare occasions when Jasper, for whatever reason, decided to dredge him up to the surface level of their forcibly shared mindscape. The orange Gem only ever did this for the sake of antagonizing her unfortunate hostage, by giving him a glimpse of the sparse rays of light that shined through the surface of the lake far above them, light that offered the elusive promise of hope and freedom. Promises that, Jasper would all to quickly remind him, he would never achieve again as she always ended up dragging him back down to their cripplingly cold subconscious, never even allotting him a single moment or inkling of any sort of control over their twistedly fused form whatsoever. In fact, he was lucky if she ever even let him have a word in edgewise against him, always callously brushing off all of his fierce, sometimes downright desperate attempts to fight back or resist against her. And yet, for as much as Jasper’s vengeful cruelty was starting to wear him down more and more, the worst part for Dipper by far, was that he essentially had no idea how he had even ended up in this seemingly unending waking nightmare to begin with.

In the agonizingly long stints of lonely drowning he had to endure, the question of why he was there at all was really the one Dipper was really able to grapple with. As chained as his hands were, he wasn’t really able to reach up to his forehead, but as far as he knew, there was a gemstone there, a gemstone that, by all accounts, apparently made him a Gem. The fact that he had been able to fuse with Jasper at all was proof enough of that, as disconcerting and alarming as the very thought. And yet how exactly he had somehow changed from human to Gem and wound up in the lake in Lapis’ place was a complete and utter mystery to him, one that, he believed if he could figure out the answer to, then perhaps he could begin to puzzle out how free himself from his current, miserable plight. The only problem was, he had no idea where to even start.

That is, until the day the normally lonely, dark corner of Malachite’s mindscape he now called home received the very last visitor he could have ever expected.

And what a surprise it certainly was for Dipper when, amidst floating miserably and silently in the dreary, empty darkness, a sudden sadistic, familiar cackle echoed through the water, sending heavy ripples throughout both it and the newly-turned Gem trapped within it. Ripples that turned into outright shock as a certain triangular demon suddenly materialized quite out of nowhere before him.

“Well, well, well, look at you, Pine Tree!” Bill exclaimed in bright greeting, startling Dipper quite a bit by his abrupt appearance. “Turns out you don’t make that shabby of a space rock after all, if I do say so myself. You’re still pretty shabby overall though; guess some things never change, even if your species does!”

It took Dipper a brief moment to break out of his relative alarm, but when he did, he was still rather baffled by his new, rather unwelcome ‘guest’ all the same. “B-Bill?! What… what are you doing here?”

“Aw, come on, kid, isn’t it obvious?” Bill asked, only for Dipper to shake his head in continued confusion. “Seriously? You don’t remember?” the demon pressed, almost surprised by this fact before letting out an exasperated groan. “Hmph. Guess I should’ve figured that suddenly having your entire human DNA rewritten into nothing a bunch of solid light molecules would scramble your brain up a little bit. Well, it would if you still technically HAD a brain anymore! But if you’re still in the dark (which you definitely seem to be right now) then let me refresh your memory for ya, Pine Tree!”

Surprisingly, true to his word, Bill did just that with a simple snap of his fingers, one that sparked a brief, bright glow in Dipper’s gemstone and instantly filled him in with flashes of everything he needed to know. He saw himself, human and free from the fused oppression he now knew; he saw Bill, cheerfully rattling on about some kind of ‘deal’ that would help free Lapis from her own dire straits; and finally, he saw himself accepting that deal, desperate to finally rescue the blue Gem who had done so much to rescue him, he saw himself shaking the demon’s flaming hand, he saw himself disintegrating into nothing but pure, formless light, he saw Bill somehow compress that light into a deep blue stone, one in the very same shape as his own birthmark. And finally, he saw the demon carelessly drop that stone into Lake Gravity Falls, into the very spot where it would be easy, almost inevitable for Jasper to find him and force him to fuse with her.

And just like that, he finally had it all figured out.

“Y-you!” Dipper gasped, pulling back away from Bill as much as he could with his arms and legs still changed as they were. “You did this! You’re the reason why I-I’m… I’m a Gem, and why I’m here, and trapped with her and-”

“Yeah, yeah, kid, no need to waste any of our time reiterating what we both already know,” Bill remarked, clearly not taking the new Gem’s apt anger seriously.

“Why?” Dipper interjected before the demon could get any of his callous remarks out, largely since he was seething with so much raw fury over how Bill had effectively turned his entire life upside down altogether. “Why would you even do something like this?!”

“Because its hilarious, Pine Tree!” Bill laughed unapologetically. “Or wait, guess I can’t really call you that anymore, seeing as how you’re the new Water Wings and all! See what I mean?” With another snap of the demon’s fingers, Dipper’s gem glistened briefly once again, though this time, a wide pair of rather elegant aquatic wings, almost identical to Lapis’, unfurled from its spot on his forehead, catching him off guard quite a bit, though the somewhat embarrassing sight only elicited even more twisted amusement from the sadistic demon. “Ha! And just when I thought this couldn’t get any more priceless! I don’t know why you look so cross, ‘Water Wings’! After all, I’m sure you’ll catch some great headwinds with those beauties, huh?!”

Dipper only offered the demon a hateful glare before glancing fretfully up at his new wings, ones that he tried to force back into his gem, though despite all of his mental straining, he had no such luck, much to his ever growing frustration with his situation as a whole. “T-this wasn’t our deal, Bill!” he shouted furiously, a part of him realizing he probably looked quite ridiculous with his watery wings coming out of his forehead, though he hardly cared.

“Oh, see, that’s where you’re wrong, kid,” Bill said. “See, I seem to remember you promising to stay outta my way in exchange for freeing your friend. But that means that somebody had to take her place, and since you wanted to save her sooooo badly, I figured you’d be the perfect fit!”

“But you never mentioned anything about turning me into a Gem or about Jasper forcing me to fuse with her!” Dipper countered hotly. “In fact, you hardly mentioned anything at all! I didn’t know anything about what I was getting myself into because you lied about it all! This isn’t fair which is why I’m calling our deal off. Change me back and get me out of here, Bill, now!”

“Aw, sure, I’d be more than happy to do that for ya, ‘Water Wings’,” Bill remarked, though his tone darkened somewhat as he pressed a bit closer to the new Gem. “Giving you back your boring old human meatskin would be a piece of cake! Of course… you do know that means that everything will go back to the way it was before. Which means… Water Wings—or I guess I should call her Pine Tree now—has to come back here to Stripes too, right?”

“W-what…?” Dipper took pause at this, his eyes widening at the alarming implication. “What… what do you mean? Where is Lapis anyway? What did you to do her?!”

“Well, I put her in your place, duh!” the demon quipped, pointing down to his flat form as it depicted an image of Lapis herself, surprisingly completely human, sitting sandwiched in between Steven and Mabel. While there were hints of worry in all three of their expressions, they still smiled to one another, their happiness only growing as the former Gem hugged both of the kids close to her, clearly relieved to be free and with them instead of trapped and alone. The very sight of finally seeing a genuine smile on Lapis’ face after so long stirred something warm up inside of Dipper, and even despite his own horrific circumstances and the fact that he couldn’t be happy there with her, he still couldn’t deny just how glad he was to finally see her released from the nightmarish prison he now found himself trapped within.

“Y-you… you turned her into a… a human…” he mused, his voice almost a whisper as he continued staring at the depiction of Lapis with a ghost of a smile on his face.  

“Ya got that right, kid,” Bill remarked evenly. “I gotta say, the shift from Gem to human was probably a bit of a downgrade for her, but hey, at least she’s finally outta this unending hellhole of pain and misery, huh? Then again, I guess she won’t be for too much longer since you’re so deadest on getting outta here yourself and forcing her back in, right, Water Wings?”

Dipper practically froze as Bill once again extended his hand out to him, blue fire licking at it as he offered him the promise of freedom, safety, and normality yet again. A promise that, by all accounts, as much as he wanted it, he knew he couldn’t take. Not when Lapis had already suffered languishing imprisonment for so long. Not when she had sacrificed almost everything she had just to protect him. Not when she was finally free and happy and living a life she never really got to enjoy before. True, Dipper did miss his own freedom; he missed Mabel and Steven and Stan and the Gems and being a human and even Lapis herself. But as much as he wanted all of that back, as much as he wanted his very life back, he knew that taking it back while taking it all away from Lapis would be nothing more than selfish, especially in light of how much she had given up for him before. And though the thought of being locked away in agonizing solitude with no one but the carelessly cruel Jasper to keep him company was nigh unbearable to him, Dipper knew that he had no choice but to endure it. After all, if Lapis was willing to go that far for him, then it was only fair that he return the favor and do the same for her.

“N-no…” he finally sighed, looking away sadly as he thought of all he was giving up. His family, his friends, his future… all of them would now only be a distant dream he’d never be able to have anymore. And even despite his righteous resolve, that alone was more than enough to bring a tear to his eye. “I… I can’t… As long as she’s safe and happy out there, then… then I’ll stay down here, like this…”

“Forever?” Bill pressed with almost twisted curiosity, clearly reveling in getting his way in the matter.

“F-forever…” Dipper muttered in defeat as that tear finally fell, knowing that, just like that, he had sealed his now hopeless fate, once and for all.

“Well, if you say so, kid!” the demon quickly pulled his hand back, taking Dipper’s seemingly only chance for freedom along with it. “But just so ya know, from here on out, there are no more take-backsies! Which means you’re pretty much stuck in here with Stripes for the long run!”

“Yeah, I… I know…” Dipper acknowledged quietly, looked down at the chains that would now keep him bound and trapped for the rest of his existence, however long that might be.

“Then I guess that’s that!” Bill concluded brightly. “Ya know, it really is a shame, Water Wings, that Pine Tree will never get to know just how much you’re giving up for her here. But oh well, with that new short human lifespan of hers, its not like she’ll have way too much longer to feel guilty about it. Unlike you, kid; you get to spend the next several millennia hanging out down here with Stripes. Who knows? Maybe by the time she decides to let you out, some of the people you love and care about will still be around… Nah, I’m just kidding, they’ll all be long dead and gone by then! Ha! This can’t get any better, can it!? But, I guess if you don’t have any further need for my ‘services’, then I’ll just be taking off here. See ya, Water Wings! Oh, and have fun spending the next few thousand years as a lonely little prisoner inside of a grotesque, hulking monster of a Gem fusion! Like always, I’ll be watching you!”

And, without sparing another word to the hapless new Gem he had so cruelly deceived, Bill disappeared, leaving Dipper alone in the dark depths of Malachite’s mindset once again, a prison that only seemed even more suffocating as he realized he had just condemned himself to being confined to it forever. And as that realization sunk in more and more, his aquatic wings finally dissipated in his growing despair, his eyes welling up with more and more tears that he was powerless to contain as they came out in heartbroken sobs.

Though Bill had told him he’d exist practically forever, Dipper felt as though his life might has well have ended right then and there. Because now, as a result of his own haste and foolishness alone, he’d never again get to experience anything but the empty darkness currently surrounding him, he’d never know anything but Jasper’s senseless burning hatred and cruel punishments and torture. He’d never again get to feel the warmth of the sun or breathe in the fresh morning air or even exist as his own being, his own person outside of the monstrous fusion he now was. He’d never get to hang out with Steven or Connie or Stan or even any of the Gems again, never tell any of them just how much they all meant to him. He’d never get to see Mabel again, to make amends for their final argument or take back the heated words he regretted so much now more than ever. And perhaps worst of all, he’d never get to thank Lapis for her sacrifice, for taking on the immeasurable burden he had now accepted in her stead. He’d never get to keep up his end of the promise he had made to her, that they would be safe and happy and together once again. He’d never get to do any of that, and he only had himself to blame for selling it all away in a moment of pain and desperation, two things that would now only accompany him forevermore.

Because now, he was just as Jasper herself had said; nothing more than a prisoner, a piece of the monstrous Malachite and all that they entailed.

And, from then on out, that’s all he ever would be, for the rest of time itself.

Or at least, that’s what he thought.

It took almost a month for any of them to finally discover where Dipper had been for so long. And when they did, it was in the least expected, and most alarming way possible.

Because when, after another long night of combing the surrounding area near Gravity Falls for any hopes of finding him, Dipper began to suddenly and inexplicably appear in Steven’s dreams, Lapis, Mabel, and the Gems all pressed him to keep going, to look further for the longtime missing boy who had seemingly vanished without a trace. And it was only as Steven found himself dropped into a vast, shadowy teal ocean, one that’s bitter cold water seemed to carry a feeling of mournful agony and hopeless suffering to it, that he finally, finally found Dipper. Though the state in which he found him was anything but relieving.

He floated amidst the seemingly fathomless ocean only a few feet away, his head hung and his eyes closed in an expression of complete and utter beaten exhaustion. Though what concerned Steven the most upon a first glance wasn’t just the fact that his entire coloration was now inexplicable shades of dark, deep blue; rather it was the thick, watery chains locked tightly around his wrists, ankles, and even his neck, all keeping him secured tightly in place, for whatever reason. Something that wasn’t going to continue for too much longer if Steven had anything to do about it.

“D-Dipper!” the young Gem cried, launching himself forward amidst the water he could somehow breathe in. This call was surprisingly enough to rouse Dipper from whatever stupor he was in as he weakly glanced up at Steven, letting out a gasp of shock to see anyone other than Jasper for the first time in what felt like years.

“S-Steven?” he asked, immediately perking up with both surprise and with oncoming fear as he glanced up anxiously. After all, in light of his self-imposed isolation here, he could have never expected Steven of all people to show up, though seeing such a friendly face hardly relieved him now. “W-what are you doing here? No, wait, how did you even get in here in the first place?! D-don’t tell me she-”

“W-wait, hold on, where is here, Dipper?” Steven asked, not hesitating to get the most important details first. “Is this where you’ve been for the past month? If it is, then you have to tell me where we are so we can finally come find you!”

“…I-it… its been a month?” Dipper asked, eyes wide with disbelief upon hearing this disconcerting news, one that almost brought tears to his eyes as he realized just how long he had been a prisoner for. “I-I’ve really been trapped here all that time?”

“Trapped where?!” the young Gem insisted almost desperately, placing his hands on Dipper’s shoulders in an attempt to shake him out of his rattled revere. “Dipper, please, you-”

“S-Steven!” he suddenly interrupted, fear filling his expression even more as he looked back up to his friend. “I don’t know how you got here, but you have to leave, now, before she realizes you’re here! Please, you can’t be-”

“Before who realizes I’m here?” Steven asked, confused. “Dipper, you’re not making any sense. I-I just want to help you, which means you have to tell me what’s going on. A-are you hurt? Who’s trapping you here? Why do you seem so scared?”

Dipper hesitated, flinching away out of genuine anxiety as he stole yet another glance upward, as if he was expecting something to emerge from above. Yet all the same, he forced his very apparent dread aside to finally try and offer some concrete information as he met Steven’s fretful gaze once again. “S-Steven, I’ve been-”

Before he even had a chance to finish, however, Dipper was suddenly lurched upward by the chains binding him, and despite a brief bout of resistance against this force, he was ultimately powerless to keep himself from being pulled up sharply by whatever was above him. “D-Dipper!” Steven cried, acting on instinct as he lunged forward to grab onto his friend’s ankle and keep him weighed down, though that hardly did anything except pull him upwards as well.

“S-Steven, what are you doing?!” Dipper exclaimed in immense panic as the young Gem continued to hold on. “You need to let go! If she sees you, then she’ll-”

“N-no! I’m not letting go!” Steven insisted, tears starting to well up in his eyes that were reserved solely for the friend he had been morosely missing for so long now. “I have to save you!”

“Ugh, you don’t understand!” Dipper shot back, somewhat frustrated with his persistence. “You can’t save me! I’m not-”

Once again, he was cut off as they both finally surfaced above the water, essentially landing on top of each other as they collapsed together upon its somewhat solid, dark surface. As breathless and worn as both of them were, however, neither of them had much of a chance to recover as they were joined by a new figure altogether.

“Alright, what’s with all the noise down there?” Jasper growled to her unfortunate captive as she marched over to him, her expression set in an unsavory scowl as she practically towered over both Dipper and Steven. “I thought I told you to…” The orange Gem suddenly trailed off, her eyes widening with shock as she noticed the young Gem in particular as he slowly began to pick himself up off the ground. “It can’t be… Rose?!”

“J-Jasper!” Steven sucked in a sharp, frightened gasp as he quickly stood, unquestionably afraid of the fierce Gem warrior who had nearly killed him in their first encounter. However, before Jasper could take another step closer to him, her approach was suddenly halted as none other than her own young hostage who had rushed to stand in between her and Steven.

“Leave him alone!” Dipper shouted defiantly, refusing to let Steven endure anything remotely close to the same kind of abuse and torment he had been going through for the past month. Unfortunately though, despite his selfless resolve to protect the young Gem, Jasper was, as always, much stronger and much more in control than he could ever hope to be. A fact that she easily proved as, with just a simple nod of her head, another burst of water shot up from the ground, one that formed something of an aquatic gag meant to silence Dipper as it latched onto him and covered his mouth. At the same time his other chains all tightened oppressively, keeping him essentially locked in place and helpless to do anything but watch in horror as Jasper sulked ever closer to the aptly frightened Steven.

“You stay out of this, Lazuli!” the orange Gem shouted back at him quite threateningly as the young Gem backed away from her apprehensively, especially as she turned to him with a triumphant grin. “And as for you, Rose… I don’t know how you got in here, but am I ever glad you’re here to see this. You thought you could take my Diamond away from me all those years ago? Well, look! I’ve taken one of your ‘Crystal Gems’ away from you!” Her twisted smile deepened as she motioned to Dipper, who was still trying his best to pull against his restraining chains, though of course, it was to no avail at all.

“Y-your… what?” Steven asked, completely confused amidst his ongoing fear. “I-I don’t understand! What are you doing to him?!”

“I’ll tell you what I’m doing,” Jasper sneered haughtily. “I’m getting even with both you and with her,” she nodded back to Dipper once more, who was only able to shake his head in worried warning to Steven, trying to beg him to get away while he still could. Something that, unfortunately, the young Gem didn’t understand as the orange Gem continued. “When Lapis disappeared and this one showed up in her place, I figured it was only fair that I make her suffer every ounce of suffering she put me through because of her! So I figured the best way to do that was to give her a taste of Malachite first hand…”

Steven couldn’t help but gasp in disbelief, his eyes wide with worry as he looked back to Dipper once more, who only looked away from him in shame out of the deal he had made, one that he wasn’t even able to properly explain for himself thanks to Jasper. “Y-you… you fused with him?” the young Gem asked with dawning horror. “But… but how? He’s not even a Gem! You can’t-”

“Ha! You really think I’m gonna fall for that tired old trick again?” Jasper scoffed, stepping over to Dipper and wrenching his chains even tighter as he pulled him towards her. “If she’s not a Gem, then what’s this?” Once again, the orange Gem roughly brushed her captive’s hair aside to reveal the stone fixated to his forehead, a sight that left Steven completely floored from the very moment he saw it.

“D-Dipper…” Steven said, his voice soft and sad as he looked to the new Gem, finally piecing everything about his ongoing mysterious absence together; and the picture he got once he had, was anything but comforting. “Y-you and Lapis… you guys… you’ve been-”

“Enough talking,” Jasper huffed impatiently as she roughly shoved Dipper aside to focus her attention back on Steven. “You know, Rose, I wanted to finish you off in front of what’s left of your pathetic army. But since you’re already here, I might as well make the most of a perfect opportunity. At least you’ll have one member of a captive audience around to see you in your shattering moments…”

It was clear that Jasper was taking quite a bit of sadistic pleasure in the obvious fear as was causing Steven, especially as she towered over him, her heavy helmet summoned and ready to land a brutal blow upon the defenseless young Gem before her. And yet… before she could throw her helmet down, something completely unexpected happened instead.

In an instant almost too quick to notice, a sudden burst of water lashed out at the orange Gem, latching itself around her neck in a thick, bulky chained manacle. Jasper lurched back, startled as more chains began to wrap around her wrists and even her legs until they managed to pull her down to the watery ground altogether. “W-what?!” she gasped, shocked as both her and Steven glanced back to none other than Dipper. His own chains and even the gag were completely gone, replaced by orbs of water that seemed to control Jasper’s chains entirely as they surrounded his tightly clenched hands. But what was by far the most surprising was his expression: fierce, outraged, and absolutely hostile as he struggled to pull the orange Gem back away from Steven and towards himself instead.

“I-I said… leave him alone!” he shouted as he threw his hands down, brutally shoving Jasper back down into the depths that were usually his prison. It was easily the first time he had ever had any semblance of actual control of Malachite’s mindscape, which was why he was left in slight shock as the orange Gem disappeared, leaving him and Steven alone and relatively safe, if only for a moment.

“D-Dipper…” Steven began rather breathlessly as he slowly began to approach the new Gem. “T-that… that was… are… are you really a Gem now?”

The most Dipper could do as the young Gem posed such a question was let out a small sigh, averting his concerned gaze once again as he instead looked to the water now surrounding his hands. “Steven, I-I-” Suddenly, he was cut off as his hands were pulled sharply downward, clearly by Jasper trying to work her way back up to the surface once more. Which of course, meant that there wasn’t much time before Dipper knew he’d be pulled back down in her place, with not a single soul to relay what could very well be the last message he might ever be able to get out. And so, he wasted not a single moment in telling the young Gem everything he could in what little time he had left. “S-Steven, listen to me!” he said, his tone serious and intent even as Jasper continued trying to pull him back under and herself back up. “I made a huge mistake b-but there’s no way to undo that now. Right now, I need you to get out of here a-and tell both Mabel and Lapis that I’m so sorry for all of this! I didn’t know things would turn out this way, but like I said, I can’t change that anymore, so… so I’m just going to have to stay here… l-like this…”

“What? No!” Steven cried, horrified by the very thought of Dipper keeping himself trapped in such an awful state. “Dipper, you don’t have to stay here! We can—no, we will help you! T-the Gems, I’m sure they can figure out a way to split you and Jasper up and then we can-”

“No, Steven!” Dipper insisted somewhat harshly. “I can’t leave. Because if I do, t-then Lapis has to come back here and be trapped with her all over again a-and I can’t do that to her, Steven, I can’t! She’s already been trapped enough!”

“But what about you, Dipper?!” the young Gem pressed almost desperately. “You don’t deserve to be trapped like this either! Lapis wouldn’t want this; I know she doesn’t! She wants you to safe and at home and with her! T-that’s why you have to let us help you. We just want you back already; everyone misses you, Lapis misses you, I miss you! S-so just tell me where you—or I guess where Malachite’s at and we can come and-”

“Just stop already, Steven!” Dipper shouted fiercely, clearly struggling to focus on keeping Jasper anchored down at this point. “Like I said, you don’t get it! I made this mess, which means I have to deal with it, alone! I don’t want anyone else getting hurt because of me!”

“But-”

“Just let me do this for you, Lapis!” Dipper suddenly snapped, yanking Jasper’s chains tightly in anger before he realized how he had misspoke. His eyes were wide and pained and filling up with oncoming tears as he looked to Steven once more, reaching the agonizing realization that this was perhaps the last time he’d ever get to see him. A fact that barely seemed to barely matter and matter more than anything at all, all at the same exact time. “I-I mean… I didn’t…”

“Dipper…” Steven said sadly, reaching a shaking hand out to his suffering friend. A hand that he made no attempts to take as he pulled away in both grief and shame.

Dipper still wasn’t exactly sure how his new water wings worked, but even so, he somehow managed to summon them from his gem, awkwardly maneuvering them around himself to block himself off from Steven more than anything else, despite the young Gem’s persistent attempts to reach out to him. “I’m sorry, Steven, but… I’m not Dipper anymore…” he said coldly, his tears lost amidst the water he was trapping himself within as he felt Jasper inch ever closer to the surface, ready to overtake him at seemingly any moment. Even so, he did let out a sigh of both sadness and relief as he saw Steven begin to inexplicably vanish from their mindscape altogether just as Jasper brutally emerged back into it. Surprisingly enough, however, she didn’t immediately shove him back down as she realized exactly what his intent was. An intent that she only smiled cruelly over as she stood behind him, a hand gripped tightly on his shoulder as they proclaimed her vicious triumph, his broken defeat, and their twisted fusion, all at the same exact time in perfect, empty unison:

“We’re Malachite now…”

To be continued…

[prudencepaccard]

you probably posted about this before but your recent posts had me thinking. like. were convicts actually allowed to modify their uniform? how strict were the clothing restrictions anyway, would they get in trouble if they lost/added an item?

I have SO many questions about uniform protocol and have so far only had tantalizing glimpses of what I’m sure is a wealth of information somewhere. While bagne documents are sometimes organized by topic, this isn’t one of them–not only does the archival classification system in use at the SHD not help in this regard, but clothing discussion seems to be kind of dispersed even within the bagne administration’s own bureaucracy.

I’ve looked in the most likely places, but it’s impossible to really find everything without doing an exhaustive sweep, of well, EVERYTHING. Ministerial dispatches are particularly frustrating–it’s like trawling through a corporation’s e-mails but without a search function. There are at least memos summarizing the content, and often labels about what bureau is involved, but they’re still mostly organized by date–not only volume to volume, but within the binding.

I’ve gotten hints that there might be richer veins in the Vincennes SHD, but I wasn’t able to get there at all, for logistical reasons. I would very much like to someday. (Particularly disappointing was the fact that I couldn’t any reference whatsoever to the so-called arlequin uniform, despite having leads to follow wrt the year and circumstances of its abolition. It must be discussed somewhere–if not in Rochefort, then perhaps at Vincennes.)

Anyway so far I’ve only been able to go off of, like, random anecdotal pieces of evidence plus the occasional case study. I have unfortunately been doing a lot of generalization and extrapolation. I have no found any sort of mode d’emploi regarding the convict or guard uniform, although I have found manuals regarding convict hygiene, how to register convicts’ arrival, liberation and death, and the design of sailors’ uniforms. The closest things I have are a July Monarchy-era ministerial dispatch in Rochefort about the fabric needed for casaques, and Restoration-era letters written by the commissaire in Brest about schako orders for the guards, the shitty quality of their shoes, and–finally–an itemized list of the elements making up the convict uniform + how long each was supposed to last (a lot less time than I had previously thought!) + modifications thereof (by which I mean changes made by the administration, not the convicts).I have found no textual evidence, administrative or otherwise, regarding the modifications convicts were permitted to make to the uniform–unless you count Brissac talking about the office dandies wearing their casaque and bonent a certain way (but this doesn’t involve adding or taking away a garment). All my evidence, such as it is, is iconographic–various illustrations, most notably those done by Clemens. And boy, is that like…a minefield. How literally do I take it? Clemens is at once very close and very far from the truth. He has knowledge an outsider doesn’t, but for obvious reasons his reportage is very–spun? Biased? But there are also things he has no reason to lie about–unless he’s a pathological liar, of course, which he might have been! It’s impossible to tell what to take seriously–especially since sometimes the lies are their own truth.

But suffice to say that, hermeneutic headaches aside, Clemens’ representations of himself and others contain an absolute shit-ton of image management, and this includes garments that were definitely not issued by the Maison–primarily cravats. Anything else would probably have been considered disguise material, and not allowed; I have even seen “possessing a garment foreign to the bagne” listed as a specific infraction in Toulon’s punishment registers–as is SELLING items from the uniform, which really baffles me (who was buying???). But a cravat alone doesn’t really interfere with the disciplinary logic of the uniform, and it’s not big enough to really serve as a disguise (although it could certainly aid in one!).One of the focal points of Clemens’ self-portrait is a white cravat with a blue gridded pattern, which matches his eyes [1]. This cravat makes a lot of sense in the image. What’s a little stranger is the red cravat worn by Auguste-Silvestre Jallez in another watercolor [2]–the man’s in handcuffs, being punished for an escape attempt (there’s an allegorical caged bird because Clemens is Like That) but he’s also really sartorially differentiated, not in spite but because of his affliction. Clemens’ thesis in the text is that Jallez is just a wild motherfucker who needs to chill and this is reflected in the clothes he gives him–the casaque is nowhere in sight (perhaps this was practical, because of the handcuffs), instead he wears the chemise and the red waistcoat that formed the underlayers of the uniform, but with the striking and highly supplementary detail of a flamboyant and fairly large cravat of the same color as the waistcoat. Your eyes ceaselessly move between his cuffed hands, his defiant eyes, and his cravat. As far as the verisimilitude/accuracy of the image goes, I can’t speak to the clothes but I can say that Jallez’s physical depiction is consistent with the anthropometric details of his matricule entry.

To recap, removing a garment was almost certainly not allowed, and losing one was probably punished, as was selling them. And adding was punished insofar as a garment could be used for disguise. But cravats and other small additions just may have been allowed.

P.S. This isn’t pertinent to the bagne proper, but the Huguenot galley-slave Jean Marteilhe (imprisoned 1700-1715) talks of being allowed to upgrade his clothes at his own expense, so long as the fabric was still red.

[1]

[2]

ETA: more musings on Jallez ^ from a tumblr chat with revolutionaryshoe–

> so, I got to see the Clemens journal in its entirety!>which means, like, there are finally EXPLANATIONS for the illustrations>unfortunately I’m still as much in the dark as ever[regarding the birdcage and anvil in the Jallez portrait]>but I’m pretty sure it’s allegorical>but like, by default, because he doesn’t explain it>but that was my interpretation before I got ahold of the text>oh well also more than that>now that I have more info it also makes even more sense that it’s allegorical>esp. with Jallez/caged bird>what I can’t figure out is the anvil with the hammer and rivets on it>I guess it represents him being shackled once again–which is kinda the language Clemens uses, like “so after his nth failed escape attempt, here he is back in irons…”>he doesn’t talk about the guy’s backstory much, he just emphasizes how the guy keeps trying to escape and it just isn’t happening>there’s palpable pity there>the only bit of info we get about the man’s history is that he’s from the Midi and very smart and very angry>I did some digging and found ONE source on Google Books about him (a hapax legomenon!)>his first name seems to have been Auguste-Sylvestre (Clemens doesn’t tell us his full name) and he was sentenced in Vaucluse (which is in the south of France) so that matches>for theft, which also matches>and the dates line up>what I like about the picture too is that he has this extremely subtle half-smile>but it’s an angry half-smile>and Clemens even says that the guy’s lips often smile even though he’s extremely bitter>Clemens is just good like that>like he’s often pretty bad at drawing people’s *physiognomies* well, but boy does he nail their personality>or like–nail what he wants us to think their personality is>because he could be lying! but it’s a convincing visual lie is my point>like doesn’t he just look the lovable rogue in his self-portrait>I should be able to find him at the SHD archives tomorrow>his file [note: I also have his matricule entry from Toulon, which I don’t remember taking AT ALL but I must have stumbled on it and taken a photo in case it was the same guy which it is; all that’s left is Brest if I want his full history]>done>and it indeed was him>they’re the same guy, as I assumed>Auguste-Silvestre Jallez the versifier and Jallez the caged bird>and his physical description in the matricule matches Clemens’ verbal description (and portrait)>his name is spelled “Jallès” in the matricule>whereas in both Clemens and that one source about his poetry it’s “Jallez”>I don’t know why this tickles me so much>but when Clemens describes him he’s like “he has a unibrow”>and draws him with it>and sure enough, his eyebrows are described as “thick” in his matricule>when normally all it says it the color>I wonder how much else was true to life in that portrait>like again the bird is allegorical for sure>but I’m fascinated by Jallez’ fashion sense>he has a cravat>which isn’t part of he uniform at all but is a piece of individuality you were allowed to have [maybe???]>and yet, it’s red>which strikes me as an odd choice>Clemens’ choice is much more expected (the blue and white checked cravat)>the aesthetics of his “visual identity” (to borrow a term from a Freudian queer theorist named David Greven) are so fascinating>because on the one hand he’s being totally ground down>like he’d just been caught for yet another escape attempt, and is being punished for it/imprisoned more thoroughly for practical reasons–like okay you’re an escape risk, we’ll double down on the carceral impedimenta then shall we>there are two focal points in that painting I feel–or like, three but two of them are kind of sharing the role>they’re in tension>one of them is his cuffed hands, which are so attention-grabbing because of 1) the awkward position he has to hold them in and 2) the clear defiance in his fists which kind of radiates out into his entire posture>and is shared with his eyes–that attitude of, well you called it pissiness so let’s go with that>meanwhile there’s that *extravagant* red cravat which is like–fiery red, passionate etc. but also it’s like..that’s the color of institutional repression>and his eyes are kind of a pivot between the two points>the flash in them is linked to the cravat, but the defiance is linked to his hands>I have no idea if I’m making sense I haven’t slept in two days>anyway my eyes keep moving back and forth between those three points>his hair is very distinctive too and I now know that to be on purpose, from reading the text>he mentions Jallez having grown it out a bit prior to his escape>one more thing–unlike many of the portraits in the journal, this was completely from memory>Clemens arrived in Rochefort in 1834 and Jallez (who’d been there since 1830) was transferred to Brest in 1835>they didn’t have that long of a time together compared to the others and Clemens made the journal MUCH later–I forget exactly when but sometime in the 1840s>but he must have made an impression>his subtitle for the Jallez section is “Yet another plan foiled”>referring to his latest escape>and Clemens kind of tsk tsks about it, like why won’t this fiery Meridional calm down and make it easier on himself>and I’m just like Clemens my dude the guy was sentenced to life for ONE THEFT I’d be mad too>jeez I just realized I started an “on the one hand…” construction and never said what the other hand was>but I presume it’s clear I was going to talk about the cravat>how the idea of somebody accessorizing while ALSO being punished (more than usual) is so striking>being casaque-free also creates quite an effect, sartorially>like obv it’s not a bourgeois effect. Not with those colors.>but still–like, it’s a waistcoat. It’s not even an unstylish one.>The “red waistcoast  under the casaque rouge” thing slays me and I’m almost certain it was a common uniform design>like the bagne uniform varied a lot and I have no idea when a gilet would have been introduced but it just…it’s endlessly fascinating to me>okay I’m gonna peace out before I start making no sense