#he appreciates sunday humouring his silliness and he loves him VERY much

[stagehunt]

✧･ﾟ @halovien sent: ❝ delivery for you, dear. ❞ sunday's tone gives no indication that anything is amiss, though the presence of mail in general was odd given physical mail in space delivered to their home was highly unlikely. yet he says nothing else, just holding out the letter for his husband to take. when the blond takes it and reads it, it is unmistakably sunday's own writing. to my dearly beloved, i am unsure why this must be put to print, but i hereby declare that as my husband, you have the executive privilege to do whatever you please in regards to me and our life together. there is, however, some limitations i must impose such as: nothing too inappropriate in public ( given the chance we can. kissing and decent displays of affection are perfectly welcome ), refraining from giving the cats an excessive amount of treats, and no distractions while i'm working. no one has anything close to this much freedom regarding my personal life, but it is only right that it's your sole privilege given our status and my devotion to you. if you have questions pertaining to the limitations or what exactly your privileges entail, as always, feel free to let me know. yours, gabriel / unprompted, always accepting.

“     mail?     ”     they’re   careful   not   to   let   this   ship   linger   around   long   enough   to   be   recognised   anywhere,    even   the   few   people   made   aware   of   their   current   arrangements   wouldn’t   know   where   to   find   either   of   the   two   without   asking   first.   so   he   doesn’t     buy   it,     evidenced   in   gaze   flitting   between   sunday   and   the   envelope   and   back   to   sunday   in   rapid   succession     —     but   he   accepts   with   a   hum   only   slightly   skeptical,     coffee   abandoned   in   favor   of   carefully   unsealing   the   top   and   unfolding   the   letter   within.   an   arm   curled   around   his   partners   waist   to   tug   him   in   towards   the   kitchen   table;       aven’s   head   falling     to   rest   against   his   side     as   he   takes   in   familiar,     beautiful   penmanship.       

    

this   is      …      he   pauses   half   way   through   to   cast   a   look   of     disbelief     in   the   others   direction,    amused   little   smile   only   widening   the   further   he   reads.     “      whatever   i   please?     ”     he’s   grinning   now.      “      darling,     i   thought   you   knew   how   to   draft   a   contract.   the   terms   laid   out   here   are     …     vague   at   best,     hardly   as     comprehensive     as   i’d   expect   from   you   of   all    people.     ”      oh,     he’d   love   to   hear   about   those   privileges   in   detail,     but   his   head   already   tilts   into   sunday,     overcome   by   a   surge   of   fondness   when   he   cranes   to   look   up   at   them   that   subdues   the   inclincation   to   tease.   gabe   indulges   in   his   most   asinine   requests     far   too   much     and   it   stirs   a   concoction   of   something   dangerously   smug,     admittedly   soft   in   him.     “     let’s   see      —      unfortunately   i   love   you   too   much   to   take   advantage   of   the   lack   of   a fine print,     so   let’s   treat   this   as   an   informal   mutual   agreement,    shall   we?   mutual,     meaning   that   the   same   statutes     also     apply   to   you.      ”                        

[mostlymovieswithmax]

Movies I watched in July

Once again I’m doing my monthly round-up of movies I’ve watched. This was a good month for the cinema getting back on track and seeing new releases including the new M. Night movie, Old and James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad. Pretty sure Marvel put out a new movie also. I’m hoping that this list can help in guiding a decision about what to watch (or what to avoid) and introduce people to movies they may otherwise not have heard of or bothered to see. These short reviews are my own subjective opinions on each individual movie and maybe a more informal approach to movie criticism can help include others who are just passing through. Here is every film I watched from the 1st to the 31st of July.

Bridesmaids (2011) - 4/10

Off to a good start. I won’t say Bridesmaids is a terrible movie but I don’t think I’m exactly the target audience. As far as I know, this is a beloved comedy but I just can’t get on board with all the boring, juvenile humour; with Maya Rudolph shitting in the street, with Rose Byrne and Kristen Wiig trying to one-up each other at a toast that went on forever, with Melissa McCarthy shitting in a sink… the conflict is so done to death and makes the movie feel unspecial. I do understand the appeal of the film, especially for women in that before this movie the likelihood of seeing something like this, where women play up the more crass and gross side of comedy, was probably few and far between. But the story is very tired and while I did appreciate some moments, namely a couple of decent jokes and some of the more intimate scenes, for the most part it felt like they wanted to corner a more quiet type of line delivery in a way that was supposed to be understated but very funny so as to not rely on over the top body language or musical cues, and it ended up being super dull.

Spectre (2015) - 7/10

As far as I can tell, a lot of people don’t like this instalment of the James Bond franchise… but I really enjoyed it! I’ve really taken a shine to these Daniel Craig-era Bond movies and while I can’t say any of them are the most amazing thing, I have a lot of fun with them. The biggest problem I have with Spectre is the villain being utterly pointless and uninteresting in basically every way. The idea of every villain Bond has fought before being tied to this one organisation controlled by this one guy is ridiculous, and what makes it worse is that the villain is barely in it! There’s so much that doesn’t come together in this but as it goes, I still had a really good time. Daniel Craig holds the whole thing together; he is excellent as 007 and the main reason I’m up for each of these movies is because of him. Sam Mendes directs again after the previous instalment and for what it’s worth I do think he does a good job with some of the action set pieces and the locations. I’m so ready for No Time To Die.

Shazam (2019) - 7/10

Shazam is a genuinely fun superhero movie that doesn’t take itself seriously at all. I was having a great time throughout and while it could conform to some of the same tropes we’re used to with these kinds of movies, it still remained playful and used the character of Shazam to his fullest potential in a way that showed an understanding of just how silly the idea of a kid who can turn into an adult and shoot lightning out of his hands is.

High School Musical (2006) - 6/10

So as you may or may not know, I co-host a podcast: The Sunday Movie Marathon. It’s a film podcast and every week I get together with my other co-hosts and watch movies. For episode 38, we watched the High School Musical trilogy. This first movie blew me away. I was really surprised with just how much fun I had, and if you want to hear more of my thoughts on the film, please listen to episode 38 of the podcast.

High School Musical 2 (2007) - 4/10

We then jumped into the second and while it’s certainly not as good as its predecessor, there are still some brilliant songs that manage to top the last movie. Again, more of what I have to say can be heard on episode 38 of the podcast.

High School Musical 3: Senior Year (2008) - 3/10

Senior Year was pretty hard to get through. I don’t remember it being as bad as it was, but then I didn’t really remember it anyway. It did however have one redeeming quality, which you can discover on episode 38 of the podcast.

The Piano Teacher (2001) - 9/10

What the fuuuckkkk. The Piano Teacher is horrendously affecting and I was so upset when it ended, maybe not because it’s not what I wanted but because it’s just so fucking dour and unrelenting. This is the second Haneke movie I’ve seen (after the original Funny Games) and I’m so impressed with how well executed it is. Following a woman who teaches piano, we get a glimpse into the life she lives, how sheltered she is from living with her mother at an age where you’d reasonably expect a person to be living alone or with a partner or friends (even going so far as to be sleeping in the same bed as her), and how repressed she is sexually. It’s clear she’s never experienced any kind of sexual interaction or romantic love with another person, so she goes out of her way to take control and make that happen. The upsetting nature of it comes from just what she does in pursuit of it or as a result of her repression, and what is done to her. It is by no means a movie to recommend to your parents but The Piano Teacher offers so much in terms of the ideas it presents (and I’ll admit there seems to be a lot more going on than I think I picked up on a first go round) about women in modern society, and about the portrayal of sex and expectations of people when it comes to how that is represented in a person’s character depending on their gender. I really enjoyed this movie but it is not for the faint of heart.

Sharpay’s Fabulous Adventure (2011) - 1/10

My podcast co-hosts decided it’d be a right laugh to add Sharpay’s Fabulous Adventure to this episode and that might have been a fun idea for them because they got to watch it together, but I was just watching it alone. Just a 24-year-old man watching Sharpay’s Fabulous Adventure alone and having a miserable time, I might add. But for a short and sweet ramble on what we all thought, please listen to episode 38 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast.

Dr. No (1962) - 6/10

A lot of very iffy parts of this movie. A lot of discomfort arising from how black people are portrayed that really didn’t sit right with me. As far as a Bond movie goes, this first instalment in the series is one I’ve seen before and it’s not wholly engaging but it plants the seeds for the rest, with Sean Connery breathing life into the role and making an otherwise lacklustre plot bearable.

Black Widow (2021) - 6/10

I think probably the best part about Black Widow is the experience I had while watching it. It was great being back in the cinema with a couple of friends in a packed theatre. The energy was high and I’m sure for a lot of people, this is the first time they’d been to the cinema since Endgame. For what it’s worth, I did have a lot of fun with Black Widow and I’ve explained more of what I thought about the movie in episode 39 of the podcast.

The Climb (2020) - 10/10

The Climb was added to Now TV recently and I already knew I loved it, having seen it in an empty cinema theatre last year, which I had an absolute blast with. The Climb details the years of a rocky friendship told over scenes filmed as one-shots. Not only is the presentation something to gawk at, but the performances by the two leads playing these friends with a terrifically dysfunctional dynamic is truly captivating. They’re both trying to figure out their own lives and where one can come across as being rather selfish, the opposite is true in his counterpart, whom everyone loves. This is a truly funny and heartwarming movie with a lot to say about how we choose to live our lives and who we choose to be with. It’s a shame the distributors of The Climb didn’t do a very good job because if not for it being available on Now TV, it would be near impossible to watch without forking out more money than is necessary to purchase a film.

From Russia With Love (1963) - 5/10

The second Bond movie. I thought perhaps I’d change my mind on it with another watch, having seen it for the first time maybe a year ago. But no, it’s still largely boring and it treats women like absolute garbage. From Russia With Love is one of those movies I forget as I watch it, and I was trying very hard (in the middle of the day!) not to fall asleep.

The Good, The Bart, and The Loki (2021) - 1/10

I don't usually talk about the short films I watch but for this I'll make an exception. As we all should know, Disney owns The Simpsons now, through their acquisition of Fox, so, coupled with another of their properties, that being Marvel, they decided to make a six-minute animated film wherein Marvel’s Loki is stranded in Springfield. This felt as though it was a minute long due to the horrendously jarring pacing; it is a movie that feels adamant that it needs to exist, while trying as hard as it can to be over as soon as possible. It serves only to stare the audience directly in the face and say “look, characters from The Simpsons are dressed as Avengers”, shit out three credit scenes, then end before you’ve even processed the atrocity you just bore witness to.

Russian Ark (2002) - 8/10

For this next episode of the podcast, we watched a few Russian movies, starting with Russian Ark, a film shot completely in one take as the camera moves about a luxurious museum in a first-person perspective as this main character watches what is happening around him, seeing people moving about the place but unable to interact with them, guided only by another man who seems to be just slightly out of his own perception of reality. This is a tremendous feat in filmmaking and more can be heard about what I have to say in episode 39 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast.

Ivan’s Childhood (1962) - 7/10

For my own pick of Russian movies to discuss on the podcast, I chose the debut feature from one of my favourite directors, Andrei Tarkovsky. It’s amazing that while this is not his best film by far, Ivan’s Childhood is still such a stellar debut, jumping around in its timeline as it details a child’s experience in the second world war. Again, I do go into more depth in episode 39 of the podcast, so be sure to check that out.

Outlaw (2019) - 1/10

The third movie chosen for this marathon is apparently the fourth Russian LGBTQ+ movie ever made. I’m unsure of the ultimate goal of this movie but what seems to be clear is that it hates the LGBTQ+ community. This is perhaps the worst film we’ve discussed on the podcast to date, so listen to episode 39 to understand exactly why it’s such trash.

Almost Famous (2000) - 7/10

I too love heavy music and also studied journalism so it stands to reason that a movie about a teenager who makes his way onto a band tour, following them through America and interviewing them as they hang out and play shows is going to be a premise that resonates with me. This certainly did. I enjoyed Almost Famous a lot; this kid is living the dream and I was so along for the ride, seeing a lot of myself in what was being portrayed. That said, the story itself is at times a bit by the numbers and I really would’ve been more on board if the visual component was more interesting. For what it is, technically it’s fine enough but nothing in that department ever jumped out at me.

Minari (2021) - 8/10

It’s crazy that this didn’t get a theatrical run where I live in the UK. It feels as though I complain about film distribution all the time but I really don’t understand the process by which a movie gets no cinematic release and yet, months later will pop up on the front shelf of hmv, taking pride of place. But of course I got the blu-ray straight away. Minari has a lot to say about the immigrant experience, specifically in America as a family comes over from Korea and tries to start a business and make something of themselves. You get to see a lot of what you might not think twice about when you think about immigration: the hardship of coming from a place where you know everyone to somewhere rural and sparsely populated, having to make friends with locals and integrate within the community; the strain it can put on a family and on a marriage where this idea is presented about the importance of making it on your own in order to live and not just survive, while also taking into account why you’re doing it in the first place and the value you place on being part of a family that you decided to make because that was more important than money, than economy, than proving you were good enough to make it in a place that gave you very little advantage from the offset. This concept of the promised land, of the American dream is a construct. There are times when it’s not pretty, when you have no running water, or you’re in debt, or a family member is dying and it just feels like you’ve been dealt as bad a hand as you can get. But it is better to know you’re not facing all that alone.

Roma (2018) - 10/10

This was my recommendation for the podcast episode on Alfonso Cuarón movies. Roma is as beautiful as it is heart-wrenching and I would recommend listening to episode 40 of the podcast to find out more about my thoughts.

An American Werewolf In London (1981) - 8/10

In all fairness, London is enough to make anyone a little crazy at the best of times. An American Werewolf in London showcases some fantastically grotesque effects, akin to something like Carpenter’s The Thing, in showing the dead brought back to life and a horrifically gory transformation scene. Although the film is from the perspective of an American protagonist, directed also by an American, the depiction of British culture and climate is something I’ve not seen many films pull off quite so well, and I was pleasantly surprised at the more comedic tone the film has overall, which is something that works more in its favour than straight horror would.

The Party’s Just Beginning (2018) - 6/10

Karen Gillan’s directorial debut is… pretty good! There are a lot of ideas I like in this movie: a woman living life and through convenient circumstances, is confronted with death in many ways. Gillan obviously knows her homeland as well as she can, imbuing the whole thing with an intensely Scottish vibe (though maybe not in the same vein as something like Trainspotting) that makes it a bit more unique than a more run of the mill movie of this ilk, backed up in no small part by her own main performance. The plot itself is no great diversion from the kind of story I’m used to with these smaller movies and for something that’s trying to include messaging about transgender issues and suicide, it probably could have been handled better or done in a different way.

Solaris (1972) - 9/10

Another Tarkovsky joint, one I thought I’d revisit to see if there was indeed more to get out of it a second time. Well, it’s no surprise that yes, there was certainly more to get out of it. Solaris is a crazy trip of a movie and I would liken it to Kubrick’s 2001 in terms of how grand the scale of it feels. Yet this is a film that comes across as deeply personal, choosing to focus on a specific character as he goes to a space station to help those on board who are experiencing some kind of emotional crises, only to feel the effects of the planet, Solaris invading his own mind as it has the crew. To many, I can see this lengthy Russian sci-fi being a tad slow but my personal experience is one of deep engagement. Solaris pulls its viewer in a lot of different directions and it is always doing something unexpected in terms of where its narrative goes. There’s a lot to think about with the movie and thankfully it’s no chore to watch again.

Y Tu Mamá También (2001) - 9/10

Another recommendation for the podcast episode on Alfonso Cuarón movies. This is a very relaxed experience, following three young people as they go on a road trip, visit different places and have sex. Listen to episode 40 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast for more of my thoughts.

Children of Men (2006) - 10/10

My favourite Cuarón movie, one that never stops being tense as its characters are constantly moving towards the end goal. Set in a future where humans are infertile, the oldest living person is 18, and London is the last city in the world that’s still keeping it together, somewhat. This is masterclass filmmaking. Listen to episode 40 of the podcast for more insights.

Minority Report (2002) - 5/10

I’m really not the biggest fan of Spielberg… Minority Report is an interesting movie in terms of its concept of stopping crimes before they happen by way of prediction, but I just didn’t connect with the heart of it. The colouring is way too overexposed in a way that’s supposed to be eliciting a futuristic vibe but instead feels so early-2000’s in the worst way. My biggest problem with Minority Report is just how long it is, clocking in at two hours and twenty-five minutes which allows for a lot of meandering, all while never quite developing characters enough for you to care about.

Caché (2005) - 9/10

Oh god! Another Michael Haneke movie! Here we see a couple periodically sent video tapes featuring hours of footage of the outside of their house. The anxiety ratchets up and the mystery gets deeper with every minute. There’s always at least one moment in any of his films that have so far made me realise just how out of my depth I am. Caché is no exception, and I won’t spoil anything here because I think it’s better just to watch the movie and see for yourself. He is a director that wants the audience to know something and that something is never what is explicitly shown at face value; it is pressed into the fabric of the film - plainly evident, yet hidden. Caché is so stupidly clever in displaying its themes and messaging - making reference to the Siene Massacre of 1961 as well as a deeper study of colonialism - and there’s no way to change a single detail of it without risking the Jenga tower crumbling to the ground. It all works in tandem. It is passion and fury and haunting.

Coco (2017) - 7/10

Pixar had a string of around seven forgettable movies before this point so thankfully Coco emerged to show the company still had something good in them. Coco deals a lot with themes of death and legacy, remembering those who are gone in order to preserve them and while its plotting is quite basic and there are certainly moments that either drag or cannot escape the same Pixar formula, most of what the movie has to offer is a lot of fun, with creative, colourful animation and emotional beats that resonate the way they’re supposed to.

Incredibles 2 (2018) - 5/10

Oh, they almost had it! There's a lot here that could have been explored in far more interesting ways. Setting Incredibles 2 directly after the events of the first movie was not a good idea. If it had taken place five or ten years after, the characters could have been in different places in life and it would feel as though they'd actually changed and developed. But instead of trying to be a film that actually cares about its characters and the journeys they go on, a lot of the film is wrestling with the idea that Bob isn't supportive of his wife and Jack-Jack has to fight a raccoon… They have to shoehorn in a villain that in no way compares to the genius of the original. The ending of the original introduces another antagonist that gets wrapped up within this film's first ten minutes, except they don't catch him and he's never mentioned again. It's a real shame because the animation is fantastic and the acting is superb and there are great ideas sprinkled throughout. It just doesn't come together.

Toy Story 4 (2019) - 6/10

I was rather reluctant to watch Toy Story 4 because from the get-go I’m not really here for sequels being made just for the sake of it. Everyone loves Toy Story and making another one is a sure fire way to make money. This is the first time I’ve seen Toy Story 4 and for what it’s worth, I did enjoy it. The animation is immaculate and that alone feels like a huge flex from Pixar who tend to step up the game when it comes to animation in film, despite not having the best track record for films generally at this point. While it was nice to see these characters again, I found a lot of them to be side-lined (namely Buzz) in favour of a story that focuses mainly or entirely on Woody, who I just don’t like as much as in the previous movies. Generally the movie is good and decent enough but there’s no real antagonist and the plot is quite loose… it doesn’t feel as though it needed to be made from a story point of view.

Onward (2020) - 6/10

And with that I have seen every Pixar movie. And Onward is a fine one to go out on. While I don’t think it compares to the likes of earlier Pixar it’s still pretty fun. Or maybe I’m just a sucker for a medieval setting filled with bright colours and magic! Speaking of which, the animation was super and the medieval quest element is something that hooked me with the film. Again, plot-wise it does feel very familiar and I don’t know, maybe I’m past the point now of expecting Pixar to mix it up where their formula for story-telling is concerned but the movie is quite predictable. Nonetheless, while I’m not rushing back to see Onward I would hardly turn it off or refuse if someone wanted to watch it.

Old (2021) - 3/10

Oh boy! New M. Night movie dropped and my word, was it fun! For more of my thoughts on this… masterpiece (?) of a movie, please direct your attention to episode 41 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast.

T2 Trainspotting (2017) - 5/10

Trainspotting is perhaps one of my favourite movies and I had never bothered with the sequel, 20 years on, because the ending of that first movie is so conclusive. T2 felt more an excuse for these guys to get together again and in that, I probably would have preferred a couple of pictures on Twitter of the main cast and director, Danny Boyle having dinner or something. This is a fine movie - very arty in its presentation but meandering and dull in its story that doesn’t offer much in the way of proof that it had to exist.

Taste of Cherry (1997) - 9/10

What makes life worth living? This is a central question and theme of Taste of Cherry, and one that leaves such interpretation not only up to its central character but to the viewer as well. This film got me thinking about times in my life when I truly have had no answer to hard questions. Because it’s hard to convince people of things they are so adamantly against and harder still to rationalise what you believe if you’re not even entirely sure why you believe it in the first place. We are all of us alive and in recognising that, does that make it precious? And if indeed living is not a happy thing, why then should we fight so hard to preserve it? I felt upset as I watched this movie because I’ve been asked these kinds of questions before and it makes me feel stupid when I’m unable to answer. But the only real answer I can give is, everything. And if you can’t see the point then you’re not looking hard enough. Taste of Cherry is beautiful in its exploration of these topics and in its overall presentation, offering some of the best visuals in any movie I’ve seen - fitting for a feature with so much to say about the beauty of life - and an ending that as much pulls the rug out from under you as it does pull you out of the dark and make you realise just how lonely you’ve felt.

Bones (2001) - 2/10

Snoop Dogg is Jimmy Bones! This film is super funny but I’m not sure it’s trying to be and I really didn’t love it overall. But I do talk more in depth about it in episode 41 of the podcast.

The Duchess (2008) - 5/10

Another recommendation for the podcast. The Duchess was pretty much exactly what I thought it was going to be and there’s a lot to like about it but generally it’s a bit sparse. For more chat on the movie, listen to episode 41 of the podcast.

The Man With One Red Shoe (1985) - 1/10

This was another one for the podcast and man, was it awful. We had to watch it at 1.5x speed towards the end because it just wasn’t getting finished otherwise. To find out more, make sure to listen to episode 41 of the podcast.

The Emperor’s New Groove (2000) - 7/10

Pull the lever, Kronk! Haha! Slays me. I do quite miss this era of Disney, where the animation was hand-drawn and the stories were actually compelling and funny. The Emperor’s New Groove is vibrant, it’s got great characters and memorable moments that will forever be ingrained in the memory of culture. All in all, it’s just a solid flick that doesn’t waste time, developing the standard fall from glory type of arc but smoothly and in an entertaining way.

The Suicide Squad (2021) - 8/10

Oh, bloody hell! They actually made a good one! The Suicide Squad is not only better than the ‘Suicide Squad’ of 2016 in every way, it’s a genuinely great film! This time, James Gunn (director of Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy movies) is at the helm and it seems clear that Warner Bros. basically let him do what he wanted with the movie, as it doesn’t seem to bog itself down with the restrictions of a more family-friendly rating. The result of this is a far cleaner, colourful film with a clearer vision that takes from early Vietnam movies and uses that style to craft a superhero/villain movie that differentiates itself among the copious amount of existing films of the genre.      The Suicide Squad wastes very little time, introducing fun, crazy characters we’ve not seen on the big screen before and isn’t worried about killing a whole bunch of them, with standouts being Elba’s Bloodsport, Melchior’s Ratcatcher 2, Stallone’s King Shark (expertly rendered with fantastic visual effects), and Robbie’s returning interpretation of Harley Quinn.      A lot of Gunn’s trademark sense of humour is laced throughout and more often than not, it hits. The audience at the cinema were truly loving this movie and I’ll admit, I was right there with them. This mix of the gritty, gory and absurd is not something that should work as well as it does but the basic premise of the film is already so silly (and boy, do they know it) that it just works! Certainly one of the best DC movies since The Dark Knight and one I’d be more than happy to watch again. This is what the modern comic book movie should be: just balls to the wall fun!

[justletmeplayminecraft]

Hermitcraft Great British Bake Off AU

(Or the Great British Baking Show outside the UK)

With the start of a new series, I thought I'd compile this AU I came up with a while ago. Big shout out to @skywillsometimeswrite who helped me brainstorm nearly all of this (and accidentally got into the series sorry. Time to get emotional over bakers again.) 

It's Great British Bake Off, where the hermits take the place of the contestants, judges and some of the crew (with the recap boys as the hosts!) It follows the structure of the show, but to add maximum fluffiness, nobody leaves and the show works on a point system instead. The loser of each week does the washing up. (Not that the winner matters, this is all about the shenanigans.) Further explanations and what role each hermit fills with a short bio is under the cut!

The recording structure follows the usual routine. It takes place over several weeks, with the recording happening at the weekend. They stay at a hotel over the weekend. On the Saturday they record the Signature Challenge and the Technical. On the Sunday they film the Showstopper. Each week is themed, with the challenges fitting into that theme. The themes are often based around a certain kind of baking (pastry, bread, chocolate) but sometimes around time periods, places, or diets. I recommend googling or watching an episode of the show but a brief explanation of the challenges:

The Signature Challenge: They're given a certain thing (cake, pastry, biscuit, etc) to create. They've been able to practice at home. This is the opportunity to show personality and a home-cooked, rustic style with tried and tested bakes.

The Technical: The Judges take turns each week to set a recipe for an often uncommon bake. The recipe is bare-bones and the bakers have to use their intuition and knowledge about baking to create what's intended. This round is unpractised, and judged blind, with the judges outside the tent for the duration. The aim is to perfectly replicate the recipe given and that's how they're judged.

The Showstopper: A chance to bring out the big guns! They're often given a theme and a type of bake and then the contestants can go wild. The aim is to create something of professional quality, that makes the judges go 'wow' and still tastes good. Also practiced over the week, though sometimes less due to the size of the bakes.

Now onto the hermits:

The Judges are TFC and Biffa. TFC is the friendlier of the two. He does his best to find positives in bakes, although he enjoys making jokes about things that go wrong. Most of the contestants come to think of him as a grandad. Biffa gives more thorough criticism, but it helps the contestants improve a lot and is tailored towards the advice they need. They enjoy talking to the contestants about their bakes and lives outside the tent, both on and off camera. They've both had long careers in the industry.

The Hosts are our recap boys, Pixelriffs and Zloy. They're a dynamic duo in front of the camera, riffing off each other and the contestants naturally. They have a good balance of improvisation and planned skits. Zloy will doodle scenes from the tent during their downtime.

In alphabetical order, the Contestants:

1. Beef: Works as a butcher. It's often joked about, and not helped by him spilling red food colouring on his apron early in the series. He's incredibly good at piping and often creates artworks on top of his bakes for decoration. Absolutely smashes any biscuit decoration.

2. Cleo: Works as a teacher. Ironically, has to be censored at least once an episode and continuously hopes none of her students watch. It's hard to tell what she's doing until the last minute when she pulls it all together. She enjoys making little figures from fondant or rice crispy marshmallow mix.

3. Cub: Runs a sports equipment company. He likes coming up with creative solutions to the challenges and surprises the others by how focused he can become once in the zone. He has a deadpan sense of humour and a willingness to commit to bits. Often banters with Scar.

4. Etho: His job seems to change every time he mentions it. It never fails to catch the others off guard. He rarely explains his bakes, and his ability to mix flavours that shouldn't work but somehow do is infuriating. Sometimes, as he waits for things to bake, he uses the free time to play music on the baking equipment.

5. False: Works as a bodyguard. She says the details of her job are classified and never brings it up again. Nobody is sure if she's joking, but she's built. She's a very precise builder, with perfectionist tendencies that can sometimes come back to bite her if she focuses on them too much. She jumps between different themes with ease when decorating.

6. Grian: Works as an architect. He's fond of going big with his bakes, trying to push the limits of what's possible. However, he often gives himself too much to do, and ends up having to rush, disguise unfinished parts or the other contestants help him finish. He's bubbly in front of the camera and enjoys the occasional prank.

7. Impulse: Works as an electrical engineer. Also anxiety central. He's a very technical baker who's brilliant at following recipes. However, he will restart a bake if very minor things go wrong, which often leaves him pressed for time. Despite this, he's one of the most likely people to jump in and help someone who's struggling.

8. Keralis: Owns a bookstore. He loves decorating and his bakes are always some of the prettiest in the tent. Although he has a sleek, modern style, he can branch out when needed. He makes up his own pronunciation for ingredients, bakes and the other people in the tent. Gradually, everyone else starts using them too.

9. Scar: Works as a landscaper. Skilled at detailing and has out of the box thinking for his designs. Likes creating vehicles. However, sometimes he finds himself hiding bad baking with his decoration. His name proves accurate when half of his arm ends up bandaged in the first episode. Becomes good friends with Bdubs because of this.

10. Stress: Works as a personal trainer. Her bakes are always bright and colourful. It isn't a Stress bake if it doesn't make you smile. She's fairly equal on her decorating and her baking and enjoys a cartoonish style. A delight to have in the tent, loves helping other contestants and cheers them up if something doesn't go to plan.

11. xB: Medical researcher. His bakes are always creative, with fun stories behind them, if a bit dark. He's soft-spoken and doesn't raise his voice. He never quite swears but always comes close. The others can tell something's gone wrong when they hear a quiet 'dangit' or 'son of a-' and somebody jumps to find out what's happened.

12. Xisuma: Works as bee-keeper. He loves big shapes and patterns in his bakes. Often keeps things healthy(ish). He's primarily a technical baker and researches and practices his bakes extensively. However, he has a tendency to panic and makes silly mistakes (salt instead of sugar, forget to turn on the oven, etc.) 

The Crew Members:

Camera Crew:

Mumbo: Sometimes mistaken for being on a work placement/internship. He enjoys his work and takes a lot of the detail shots of the bakes. Although he can keep to himself, Iskall often brings him out of his shell and encourages him to chat with the contestants.

Ren: He's an incredibly chill presence to be around. He'll do his best to chat with contestants in-between filming and try to calm them down or hype them up. Usually he films stressful sequences with a reassuring smile and kind words. He enjoys singing in their downtime.

Zed: Very bouncy. He enjoys rushing around the tent to get over the shoulder shots or focus on the detail. He's good friends with Tango, and maybe he occasionally worries he’s ‘broken’ something to get the chance to talk to him on set. 

Sound:

Wels: He's calm and organised. He tests everybody's microphones are working and manages audio levels. He's good at handling distractions, but if they manage to catch him off-set they find he has a fun sense of humour and can give genuinely good advice. Enjoys singing to test the microphones when he thinks nobody's listening.

Wardrobe:

Iskall: Most of his work is done off-set, and he becomes good friends with the contestants, discussing their plans for bakes and chatting. He'll dart onto set to touch up make up when the cameras are off, offering words of encouragement as he does. Though it’s a bit concerning when he calls people’s bakes ‘of doom’.

On-site Medic:

Bdubs: Bdubs is a familiar sight with the accident prone contestants. He's always there with calm words and enthusiasm, talking the contestant down from their worry about their injury, helping them to relax. Despite his silliness, it's obvious he takes his job seriously. The contestants are glad to have him.

Set Manager:

Jevin: A bit chaotic, but he helps make sure things are set for filming. He enjoys getting the ingredients ready for the day and working out what they'll need. He also enjoys bullying Hypno. They've worked together a few times now. He enjoys a good joke when he gets the chance.

Hypno: Fairly relaxed, but he can appreciate a good joke and he appreciates Jevin. He helps organise ingredients and makes sure that things run smoothly on set. Very precise with his work, he doesn't cut corners and makes sure everyone has what they need, when they need it. A good person for the contestants to talk to.

Researcher:

Joe: He takes great pride in searching recipes, trying new things and adding them to his repertoire. Sure he might use a few too many words, but he's good at his job. He's not often on set, working mostly with Jevin and Hypno behind the scenes. But he might step in as tech if he's needed. A bit of a cryptid to the contestants.

Technicians:

Tango: A good friend of Zed. Even though he has some... Less than professional terms, he does his job well, and enjoys the opportunities he gets to socialise with the bakers. Very smiley and friendly, however if he’s in the tent, it’s likely something has gone very wrong. He's terrible at baking himself, much to the amusement of those who find out.

Doc: More serious than Tango, he's there to do a job, not make friends. Then he ends up making friends anyway. They're infectious. Grian enjoys 'breaking' things to annoy him (and have a chance to pull him on set to talk to him.) He does, secretly, enjoy the shenanigans the contestants get up to. But he'd never admit it.

Keeping in mind, I care less about the accuracy of this and more about The Shenanigans:

The first time Xisuma gets everything correct in a bake, he is convinced he’s still got something wrong. He spends the entire time until judging expecting there will be something wrong with it that they only discover during judging. A lot of memes are made out of his worrying.

At the end of filming during the heatwave, they have a lake party. Someone challenges Cub to jump in the lake and he cannonballs straight in. The others are surprised. Scar, who knows him well enough by then, is not. Doc is dragged in. Xisuma sits neatly on the edge and looks so relaxed they’d feel too guilty pulling him in. Keralis sits next to him and splashes him a little instead.

Cleo will make frequent asides to her students to try and impart good messages. Sometimes she swears during them. Then swears again upon realising. She uses her teacher voice on the other contestants a few times by accident (and on purpose.)

Someone doubts False’s strength. It’s probably Grian. She makes a beeline straight for him and hauls him onto her shoulder. And possibly into the lake. She makes it her mission to pick up most of the guys, whether they’re ready or not (with prior consent, of course.)

Stress and False work out together in the mornings. Sometimes some of the other contestants will join them and she’ll lead an impromptu work out session. She also does yoga in the evenings to calm down after filming. A fair few join her for that. 

Some of Etho’s jobs include: ‘I’m a gardener so I want this cake to include edible flowers’, ‘I’m a beekeeper so I wanted to use honey.’, ‘I’m a piano tuner so music is a big part of my life’, ‘I used to hack as a part-time job’. His job subtitle changes each episode. He gets a lot of concerned looks from other contestants.

Grian and Scar become frenemies because they’re bench buddies. Grian loves bullying Mumbo off-camera. He argues with Iskall over wearing anything but a red sweater. He loves complimenting everyone’s bakes. He makes a lot of friends. 

Tango and Zed often try to take jobs on the same productions. Zed likes to bother Tango with stupid ways to make broken tech work. Impulse will sit there and try to fix it in earnest. They have to remind Impulse he’s supposed to having a break before filming resumes. The three quickly become friends and can be found hanging out together.

During one of the heatwaves, Impulse near passes out from heat exhaustion. There’s eleven concerned people crowding around him, and it’s one of the only times Bdubs has to seriously raise his voice to gain control of the situation. The others are all sat outside in the shade and given water. Impulse goes back to the hotel and is ambushed by a lot of very concerned friends later that day. They take good care of him and threaten to beat him up if he doesn’t take better care of himself.

During Saturday evenings is when they’ll all lounge around the hotel and hype each other up for the show stopper. They like discussing what their plans are and sharing their ideas. A lot of dumb things happen to help work off the nervous excitement. 

There’s also a lot of calming each other down when they’re stressed out and caring about each other. It’s the Found Family VibesTM.

Even though washing up is supposed to be a punishment, a group of them usually end up doing it together and singing loudly and terribly to the radio.

One of the contestants catches Wels singing as he tests his microphone and drags him outside to come and jam with the contestants. Ren joins in. Etho provides backing. It delays things a little but they agree it’s worth it.

Keralis and Beef at some point have some made up war between them that is completely stupid, entirely overdramatic, and gives all the contestants a lot to laugh about.

There is, absolutely, a prank war part way through the season. It also extends off-set. Nobody is safe.

I haven’t seen anyone doing this AU before, and I apologise if they have! I hope there’s enough unique ideas to set it apart. But yeah, this is the AU I use when I just want some Fluffy content. Thanks for reading!

[randomoranges]

the other idea i had this past sunday. how is it that “simple” ideas turn into long things? also featuring the return of my fav format: text messages.

Picnic

Étienne had been working on a mural for the past month or so, and even though he was finished, he was nothing but a perfectionist when it came to his art and therefore, he had returned to the café where he was making his mural to put the finishing touches on his work. He’d left extremely early in the morning, since the owner of the café had given him the keys, and since he hadn’t been able to sleep much, he figured it would be best to put his time to good use, much to Edward’s chagrin, who had been looking forward to a quiet morning at home. But, Étienne figured that the sooner he started, the sooner he could finish and maybe, that way, once he was done, he could take advantage of his Saturday afternoon with his boyfriend.

When Étienne stepped out for a bit to take a much needed break and enjoy a cigarette, he was delighted to find a message from Edward on his phone.

I have a surprise for you when you get home <3 Message sent: Saturday 11:17am from Eddy

Ohhhh?????????? A surprise or a “surprise”? Message sent: Saturday 11:18am from Curly <3

Omg. Mind out of the gutter Bouclé. It’s a surprise. Buuuuut, if you play your cards right it can turn into a “surprise” ;) Message sent: Saturday 11:18am from Eddy

! <3 Message sent: Saturday 11:19am from Curly <3

Regardless of, a surprise! Message sent: Saturday 11:19am from Curly <3

Yes, come find me in the backyard when you get home. Message sent: Saturday 11:21am from Eddy

I am officially intrigued. Do I have time to shower or shall I join you ASAP? Message sent: Saturday 11:21am from Curly <3

Haha. You can shower. Do I want to know how much paint is covering you or not? Message sent: Saturday 11:22am from Eddy

Mmmaaaaybe. Message sent: Saturday 11:23am from Curly <3

Img_191919sdfrs uploaded successfully Message sent: Saturday 11:24am from Curly <3

Warn a man when you send him such photos. But also, how do you manage to get paint all over you every time? It’s a gift and a curse. Message sent: Saturday 11:24am from Eddy

Hahaha. Oh but that’s nothing ;) Message sent: Saturday 11:25am from Curly <3

Img_191920aeret uploaded successfully Message sent: Saturday 11:25am from Curly <3

I said w a r n a m a n . Message sent: Saturday 11:28am from Eddy

Those colours actually compliment your skin. Message sent: Saturday 11:28am from Eddy

Also, you’re hot <3 Message sent: Saturday 11:29am from Eddy

;) Message sent: Saturday 11:29am from Curly <3

Also, shouldn’t you be working instead of sending me scandalous pictures?? Message sent: Saturday 11:31am from Eddy

Finish up so you can come home and I can get my hands all over you Message sent: Saturday 11:31am from Eddy

: D Almost done! And I’m taking a break. I’m not hearing you complain. Message sent: Saturday 11:33am from Curly <3

Hmm, no, you won’t. Not when you look that good in those photos. Text me when you’re almost home so I know when to get this surprise ready. Message sent: Saturday 11:35am from Eddy

Sounds good! Later <3 Message sent: Saturday 11:35am from Curly <3

Happy painting <3 Message sent: Saturday 11:36am from Eddy

Étienne grinned as he pocketed his phone and then finished his cigarette, intrigued as to what this surprise could be, but he put it in the back of his mind so that he could focus on his work instead. It took him another two hours or so before he finished, packed up his gear and then he had to wait for the owner of the café to come by, check over his work and then pay him. The owner was incredibly pleased, paid Étienne in cash, and even threw in a tip for him. All in all, it hadn’t been such a terrible Saturday morning after all.

Guess who is now #loaded Message sent: Saturday 1:08pm from Curly <3

Img_191921gwedf uploaded successfully Message sent: Saturday 1:10pm from Curly <3

That’s a lot of red and brown! Message sent: Saturday 1:16pm from Eddy

You bet your pretty little derrière it is! Anyways, I’m going to the bank to drop this cash off and then I’ll be home headed. Should be there in... 30 minutes? Message sent: Saturday 1:18pm from Curly <3

Sounds good! I’ll be in the backyard – no peeking! Message sent: Saturday 1:21pm from Eddy

Edward Murphy, whatever are you up to? Message sent: Saturday 1:21pm from Curly <3

Y o u ‘ l l s e e 0:) Message sent: Saturday 1:23pm from Eddy

Can’t wait! Message sent: Saturday 1:24pm from Curly <3

--

With Étienne out of the house at the crack of dawn, (or what seemed like it anyways), Edward had not been able to really get any more sleep after he had left. Therefore, he had gotten out of bed and decided to start his day, which turned out to be the first nice day in a really long time. Edward had originally thought of making some chicken in the oven, for supper, since he hadn’t thought the weather forecast would hold on to its 21 degrees and sunshine, but when he saw that it was actually sunny and hot, he decided to change his plans for something a little more fun and different – a picnic in the backyard.

The really great thing about the backyard was that it was bathed in sunlight from early morning until late afternoon. It had been one of the reasons why Edward had looked into this place, knowing how much Étienne craved sunlight and the garden space, shed and pear tree turned into an added bonus. Now that they had an actual backyard with actual grass and actual space, Edward decided that it would be the best way to spend the afternoon together.

Winter had been long, never ending, and harsh, the start of spring had been non-existent, and Edward could tell that it all took a toll on Étienne’s spirit. Even though this wasn’t a cure for his blues, Edward knew that Étienne would appreciate the thought and so Edward fished out the picnic basket and checkered tablecloth they normally used for their picnics, cleaned out the cooler, and dug out the plastic utensils and dishes they used when they ate outside.

He had spent the better part of his morning assembling ingredients and recipes, going to the grocery store twice and then he had disappeared into the kitchen to start making lunch-supper for when Étienne would get home. The idea of keeping the picnic a surprise had come to him later on and he was absolutely pleased with himself that he had warned his fiancé before he returned home.

Edward knew how much Étienne loved surprises, knew how much Étienne liked being spoiled, even if he made a big deal about it every time, and Edward hoped he would appreciate this one.

--

Home! Going to take a shower, care to join??? Message sent: Saturday 1:58pm from Curly <3

As tempting as that is, I’ll take a rain check on that. Don’t wanna get carried away and let your surprise spoil. Message sent: Saturday 1:59pm from Eddy

Fair. But also, wow, this sounds like some surprise. Be out in a few <3 Message sent: Saturday 2:00pm from Curly <3

Étienne was very tempted to peek into the backyard when he got home, but not only did he not want to ruin Edward’s surprise, he also knew his fiancé would be absolutely livid and would not speak to him for a really long time if he purposely spoiled the surprise. Therefore, Étienne did his best not to look, did his best not to peek from their bedroom’s French doors as he gathered some clothes to change in, did his utmost best to resist temptation as he walked to the washroom and finally let out a sigh of relief once he was locked in one of the only rooms that did not have a window with a direct view to the backyard.

He would have opted for a nice relaxing bath; he would have splurged in warm water with bubble bath until his skin pruned, but Étienne was a curious monster and so he took a quick shower, scrubbed the sweat, grime, and paint off his body, before he towelled himself off and changed into his favourite pair of shorts and tank top.

Here I come! Message sent: Saturday 2:23pm from Curly <3

Finally. I thought you drowned in there. Message sent: Saturday 2:25pm from Eddy

Étienne pocketed his phone, tried very hard not to run to the backyard, and instead opted for a brisk walk. He opened the door, stepped outside and for a moment let his eyes adjust to the sunlight, before he spotted Edward, sitting in the middle of their backyard, on what seemed to be the checkered tablecloth they used for picnics, with what seemed to be like an actual picnic spread.

Étienne’s heart did many funny different things in that moment.

Notably, it skipped several beats, tripped over itself, sped up for a moment, and soared.

He loved this ridiculous man. He truly, really did and he was incredibly lucky to have him in his life.

Étienne’s face split in a large grin and he laughed as he bounded towards the picnic setup, “Édouard! What is all of this?” Étienne practically let himself fall to the ground beside Edward so that he could properly tackle him into a tight hug and kiss the side of his face as many times as he wanted. Edward fell back and did his best not to fall on any of his carefully laid of dishes all the while brushing Étienne’s still wet hair out of his pretty green eyes.

“It’s a picnic, silly – I think they even pronounce it the same way in French,” He responded, trying to keep a straight face, but failed terribly and grinned, Étienne’s good humour contagious.

“Hon, this is amazing! Look at all of this!” Étienne took out his phone from his back pocket and took photo after photo of the set up – from the different salads, to the artfully arranged sandwich wedges (cut in tiny triangles, without any crusts), to what seemed to be at least two different types of scones (one savoury and one sweet, knowing Edward), to fruit and dessert. That went without mentioning the different types of drinks Edward had selected for their little picnic; homemade lemonade and iced tea, a cool pitcher of iced water and some of Étienne’s favourite craft beer. Edward had even gone so far as to get the cooler to keep everything perfectly chilled and had even made little levelling stands so that nothing would topple over. As Étienne got involved taking photos from close, then far, then of the details, Edward started striking silly poses, making Étienne laugh, and getting him to take photos of him as well.

Étienne loved all of this and told Edward as much, before pulling him back for another hug, “Surprise...” Edward said from the folds of Étienne’s arms, once Étienne had taken enough pictures to satisfy him for the moment. His fiancé beamed at him, before pulling him for a deep kiss, which left him completely breathless, “Wow, okay, remind me to organise backyard picnics more often,” He laughed, before he wiggled out of Étienne’s grasp to get the plastic dishes they used for when they ate outside out of the picnic basket – the ones with the colours stripes and the pink flamingos – the ones they had gotten when they were still living at the old apartment and Étienne had refused they get rid of for nostalgic reasons.

“This is absolutely amazing and everything looks absolutely great, but why did you go through all this trouble? It’s not a special occasion...” Étienne feared that with his crazy, hectic schedule of the past month he had completely forgotten about an anniversary, or something equally important, but try as he may, he wasn’t able to come up with anything and the last thing he wanted to do was let Edward down after he had gone out of this way to organise this little impromptu picnic.

“Did we ever need a special occasion to do something nice?” Edward asked him, gently teasing, as he handed him a dish and cutlery, “I wanted to do something special for you, Chéri. The weather finally turned for the best and I know you’ve been busy with work... thought it would be nice to spend the afternoon outside and do something different. I know winter and this rainy spring have been hard on you.” He said softly, combing his fingers through Étienne’s curls and he knew it was the right answer when Étienne tackled him in another hug and held him tightly. He knew it was the right answer when he saw Étienne’s beautiful green eyes sparkle with love and joy.

“You’re something else, you know that?” Étienne murmured to him, “My own personal ray of sunshine,” He added, making Edward’s cheeks pink ever so, “I know that whenever things get tough, I can always count on you to be there for me – to support me, thanks,” He placed the gentlest of kisses to Edward’s cheek and then let go of him to focus back on the food, giving Edward a much needed moment to recompose himself, “I guess we better dig in before any of this spoils – were you expecting more guests?” He joked as he started plating food on his plate.

“No, just me, you and your insatiable appetite,” Edward joked, recovering, poking Étienne’s sides.

“If it has anything to do with you, my appetite is always insatiable,” Étienne responded, sounding far too sincere, making Edward flustered all over again. He was going to be the end of him in the best possible way. Edward shoved his shoulder and then asked him to pass the quinoa salad.

--

The afternoon stretched out, the sun warming them as they chatted and caught up on the day. It felt nice, to be out in the yard, sitting on the checkered tablecloth with their shoes off, being able to brush their feet on the lush green grass, to feel the blades on the sole of their feet. Étienne complimented Edward on absolutely everything, saying that each new thing he tried was better than the last, as he stuffed his face with second helpings of almost everything. The picnic turned out to be delicious and they managed to put a fair dent in the food Edward had prepared. Étienne declared that the rest would serve as his lunches, or snacks, throughout the week and even though Edward knew that’s what was going to happen, he was still tickled pink to hear it.

Once they were satiated from the food, Étienne helped Edward bring everything back inside and put it away in the refrigerator, before he pulled his fiancé back outside, so that they could lie on the checkered tablecloth, under the gentle afternoon sun together, without a care in the world – taking a moment for themselves and enjoy the time they had. Étienne stretched luxuriously, curling himself around Edward and smiled brightly at him, feeling perfectly content in this little moment.

“This was by far the best picnic I’ve ever been on,” He said, voice soft, and Edward had to look away for a moment, as he chuckled, feeling oddly pleased with himself.

“Well, I’m glad you had a good time,” Edward said, reaching out for Étienne’s hand and giving it a squeeze.

“I always have a good time when I’m with you,” Étienne smiled at him, as white fluffy clouds streaked the sky. They stayed lying on their backs for some time, the notion of the passing minutes growing foreign, lost as they were immersed in their little bubble once more. After a moment or so, Étienne fished out his cell phone once more and looked through the photos he had taken earlier, Edward peering over his shoulder, and Étienne was dismayed when he noticed he didn’t have any of the two of them together, marking this monumental and extraordinary occasion.

Étienne sat up, Edward mimicking him, knowing that if he didn’t, Étienne would ask him to, and went along when Étienne turned the camera towards them both to take photo after photo, critically analysing each one, before declaring them perfect. Edward didn’t mind – loved looking back to the photos Étienne sent him when he had a free moment. He would always end up spending too much time looking at them, tracing over Étienne’s bright smile with his eyes, taking in how happy and still in love they looked. Sometimes, Edward would look through his photo archives, to the ones he had meticulously filed and sorted away by year, month, day, event name, to the ones of the “early days” and he would marvel at how much younger they looked; how much darker his hair had been, the different pair of glasses Étienne had worn in that year, the clothes Étienne had called fashionable then, and how good they looked together even then when they weren’t as surefooted around each other.

When Étienne was satisfied with the pictures, he lied back on the checkered tablecloth once more, and leaned on his side to be able to gaze fondly at Edward. Edward scooted just a little closer to his fiancé and silently thrilled when Étienne entwined their legs together. The late spring breeze caressed their skin and Edward chuckled when Étienne shivered lightly. Edward placed his hand on Étienne’s hip, on warm skin that felt familiar, on the exposed part of Étienne’s body, and he worked the skin with the pad of his thumb. He heard Étienne let out a small, content sigh, and watched as he closed his eyes, enjoying the moment and the attention.

Edward let his hand travel upwards, rucked up shirt following suite, until he could press his fingers into Étienne’s shoulder, warming up the knot that somehow felt like it was always there. Étienne pulled his lover closer, pulled Edward to him until their bodies were pressed flush together, trapped him in with arms and legs until Edward’s hand could dance on his back, on his shoulders, on the nape of his neck, and it was bliss. Étienne furrowed his face in the crook of Edward’s neck and melted into his embrace, relaxing under his touch.

Edward chuckled when he felt Étienne press kisses to his neck, let out a breathy, airy, little laugh when he felt Étienne suck gently on his skin, levelled with him to be eye-to-eye and looked at his best friend. If anyone would have told him… if anyone would have told him when he’d accepted that Kijiji ad that he’d embark on this crazy adventure – that his roommate would turn into his best friend and partner, he would have never believed them. And yet, here he was. And yet, even after so many years together, even now that they were engaged (he was engaged! He was going to get married! Him, Edward Murphy! Engaged! To the love of his life! It still felt surreal – it still felt like a dream – and he hoped if it was that he would never wake from it), every day felt like a new blessing.

Étienne cupped Edward’s cheek with his hand, caressed his skin ever so gently, ever so tenderly, and Edward leaned into the contact, breathed into it and savoured it. Étienne brushed his thumb over Edward’s lips, tilted his chin up to look into those hazel eyes he loved so much, and smiled softly at him. He leaned closer to his partner, nuzzling their noses together, breathing in together, before he captured Edward’s lips in the gentlest of kisses. Edward clung to Étienne, dug his fingers into his skin, bridged whatever distance was left between them, until it felt as though they were only one person. He kissed Étienne back, kissed him softly and languidly, slowly and sweetly, until they were both left breathless and a little dazed, before they started all over again.

There was no urgency, no press for time, nowhere to go safe for this space they had carved out for themselves, this mess of entangled limbs and gentle caresses, lazy smiles and joy. Edward held Étienne close, sighed contently when Étienne nuzzled his neck once more and settled around him, rubbed his back absent-mindedly as he felt Étienne settle against him, his breathing slowly evening out. Edward watched, amused, as the clouds kept passing in the sky, casting patterns on the ground; he watched the light play on Étienne’s hair, casting golden highlights to it, watched his chest rise and then fall, before the cycle commenced once more; he watched long lashes flutter for a moment, before settling, he watched and kept watch, not wanting anything to interrupt Étienne’s rest. He looked tranquil and peaceful, the worry lines Edward sometimes saw around his eyes gone, and if all naps could have this power, he would never wake Étienne from them.

He raked his fingers through Étienne’s curls, gentle and careful, marvelling like always at how they bounced back into place. Étienne remained oblivious to the attention, perhaps enjoying it in his slumber, and Edward couldn’t help himself and think that he looked adorable, a little slack jawed, as he slept with pure abandon against him.

With Étienne’s weight engulfing him, it was easy for Edward to grow drowsy himself, warm, full and feeling safe. He didn’t bother fighting it off and instead welcomed this little rest in the sun after a hectic morning. He dozed off, Étienne snoring softly by his side, tucked into the warm spring afternoon.

--

Étienne was surprised to step outside into the backyard and see a picnic set up on the grass, away from the patio. Edward had set up the table and chairs, ever mindful of Étienne’s leg, unsure if sitting on the ground for such a long time would be comfortable for him or not, and Étienne was touched.

“What’s all this for?” He asked as he walked towards the spread.

“Figured we could do something different – it seemed like a nice day for a picnic”.

Étienne studied the food on the table and he found a familiar checkered tablecloth covering the table top, a picnic basket that could have been the same they had used so many years ago, and he couldn’t help but marvel at the spread Edward had prepared.

There seemed to be all his favourites, from the different salads, to the artfully arranged sandwich wedges (cut in tiny triangles, without any crusts), to what seemed to be at least two different types of scones (one savoury and one sweet, knowing Edward), to fruit and dessert. And that went without mentioning the different types of drinks Edward had selected for their little picnic; homemade lemonade and iced tea, a cool pitcher of iced water and what turned out to be some of Étienne’s favourite craft beer.

Étienne found himself reaching into his back pocket for his phone and took a moment to take a photo of the spread, Edward rolling his eyes, fond, “At the rate you take photos, we’ll never eat,” He teased.

Étienne ignored his remark and instead walked over to Edward’s side, pulling him close for a picture, “Hush and smile, Ed,” Edward laughed and placed an arm around Étienne’s waist, keeping him close, before Étienne snapped the photo.