#he also wants his granddad to think he's cool
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delta-piscium · 2 years ago
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When Steve and Eddie start dating Wayne pulls Steve aside and is like “I know this sounds odd but you’re gonna have to take him on walks every once in a while.”
And Steve is just like “?? Sir? He is not a dog?”
Wayne gives him a slightly haunted look, muttering “sometimes I wonder,” under his breath before clearing his throat and telling Steve to just trust him on this one. 
Steve thinks this is probably something Wayne had to do when Eddie was a child to get him out of the house but the man is a full-grown adult now, Steve is not gonna walk him.
He kind of forgets about it until one day. Eddie’s been staying at Steve’s for the week and he gets home from work only to find the kitchen absolutely wrecked. He finds Eddie in another room standing in a pile of books. He very slowly approaches him, putting his hands out and making his voice soft and as carefully as he can being like, “Hey, babe, what’s up?”
Eddie whips around, eyes big and wild, rambling almost too fast for Steve to understand. “I needed to make a cake but I didn’t have a recipe so I improvised and that did not work so I went to find a recipe and did you know there are like fifty-year-old medical books here? There are so many descriptions of gross stuff in them.” He waves one of Steve’s granddads old books around and Steve has to lean back to not get smacked by it. 
“Yeah… my granddad was a doctor,” he says all while eyeing him warily. 
His hair is frizzier than usual and he’s about to turn around to grab more books and Steve does not know what this is or what to do? Should he do something? That’s when he remembers what Wayne said about walks and the way he had looked, a bit stressed and disbelieving. It’s about how Steve is feeling right now so he might as well try, right?
So he grabs Eddie, pulling him along towards the door, making up the first excuse he can think of. “Speaking of my granddad, he built a tree-house for me in the woods behind the house, let’s go look.” 
He walks into the woods at the wrong opening, leading them kind of far in before turning around to wander and pretending to look. He finally steers them back to where the tree-house actually is, all in its tiny rotten glory, and right at the edge of the lawn.
“Guess it was closer than I remember,” he says with a shrug as if dragging Eddie around for twenty minutes insisting it was further in is in any way a believable mistake. 
Eddie gives him a look like he’s acting insane, which, okay fair but Eddie did start it. And anyways he looks better now, judgmental as all hell but better.
“Cool,” He eventually says then stomps back inside. 
Eddie spends the rest of the day making fun of Steve for getting lost in the woods where he grew up but he’s not climbing the walls anymore so Steve counts it as a win.
After that he brings Eddie on regular walks, tells him it’s because he doesn’t do sports anymore and needs to move, doesn’t always feel like running and it’s boring going alone. Eddie accepts it easily but also says it’s so weird because Wayne will also drag him along on walks, and, like, what about him attracts these people who need to go on walks all the time and can’t do it alone?
Steve and Wayne have a pact to never tell Eddie, they do not even want to imagine how that would go because Eddie is a drama queen at heart and their system is working (until years later when Steve and Eddie live together hours away and Steve goes on a trip with Robin, he comes back to Eddie on his way to turn their living room into a greenhouse)
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homestuckreplay · 4 months ago
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turntechGnostic? gardenGodhead?
(page 381-387)
Dave is a cool guy, yknow? A cool dude whose default face is complete neutrality, who doesn't show emotions besides anger, the only acceptable feeling for men. If he's feeling something positive, he'll show it with a nod of the head or a twinkle of the sunglasses, not-
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HEY. WHAT'S THAT SMILE ON YOUR FACE, COOL GUY????
What's fun about meeting Dave is that we get to see him talk to all three of his friends in pretty quick succession, while with John it was far more spaced out. Dave loves John so much but I think he kind of talks down to him, and with Rose, it's the witty banter of equals. With GG, Dave is the one who seems lost in the conversation. GG throws Dave for a loop multiple times, and also blatantly makes fun of him with 'bro! hehehe' and 'feeling cool today? mr cool guy?' I didn't expect Dave to like this, and it's not obvious in the conversation that he does, but that tiny smile kinda says it all. I can honestly see these two becoming my favorite dynamic of the four main characters.
We get more GG lore too! They have a 'goofy' fetch modus which I'm super curious about. It turns out they have a granddad who's a big presence in their life, not a sister. They also have a pet who TG refers to as a 'devilbeast', and who is hard to feed and can overpower GG. Could be an unruly, badly trained dog, or perhaps GG lives on a farm and this is some kind of farm animal? Or an exotic pet their grandad attempted to tame (since he's apparently a 'total badass') but who shouldn't really be kept as a pet.
Also GG might have some psychic powers, or at least believe that they do. Which definitely puts their earlier conversations with John in a new light - instead of urging him to get the package now because they're excited to see his reaction, which is what I originally assumed, they're just emphasizing how important the package is, so that he'll know opening it is a priority if and when he finds it later.
The TG lore we get is.... less delightful. He mends his window with gaffa tape, which makes it objectively less functional as a window, definitely can't help with the heat, and doesn't even cover up the full hole. Like, just put a poster over it. More effective for less effort. Also his 'takedown' of monster movie tropes on p.386 is identical to 'guy who hates musicals because people sing in them' and is just exhausting to read. Also he thinks a white puppet ventriloquist rapper is the coolest shit ever, which is inexcusable. Basically, he needs to hang out with GG more so that they can chill him out and make him more tolerable.
I missed John so much. I've been thinking for a couple days about how I miss John, and here he is! The oil in his room has gotten significantly worse compared to p.253, which is a shame, because John is a fairly neat and clean kid when his sylladex isn't totally ruining his life.
But I guess this little harlequin beastie doesn't care about that? I love this thing's design, it's so fun. It looks so angry but somehow so incapable of causing any real harm that isn't oil based. What a silly hat for something that wants to be intimidating so bad. This will probably confirm to John once and for all that clowns are bad.
We've seen a couple other jet black, #000000 creatures so far. The Wayward Vagabond, linked from p.271, has smaller and rounder eyes but the same clawed hands. And the members of the Midnight Crew, seen on p.328-331, are visibly shinier (including their clothes?) with no visible teeth, but the rightmost two have those same elongated horizontal white eyes. Notably, all of these characters wear distinctive headgear. They all have really different roles in the story, so this could just be a shorthand for characters outside of the main four and their families, but it would be cool if some or all of them were connected.
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sirianasims · 10 months ago
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I entered the auditorium, heart pounding in my chest. There were fake cobwebs all over and eerie music filled the air. People were laughing and dancing.
I nervously straightened my tie. I was wearing one of my most elaborate designs yet, based on my grandpa Conrad’s character in Quantum Llamas. I had asked him so many questions while I made it to make sure I got the details right.
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It seemed like the entire school was here – except Myra. She would rather die than go to a lame Spooky Day school party, of course. I hadn’t told her I was going, didn’t want another argument.
I took a deep breath and made my way through the crowd. I felt their eyes on me, heard a few whispers, and I almost wanted to turn around and leave.
Suddenly Sophia stood before me.
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“Hey, Julia! Your costume is incredible! It’s Dr. Llama, right? From Quantum Llamas? Where did you get it?”
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“Oh, thanks, I… I made it myself. Or, well, the shirt and tie I bought, but I sewed and painted the suit.”
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“Seriously? I didn’t even know you could sew! Hey, Emma, check this out!”
Emma joined us.
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“Wow, you made this? You should join like, a costume competition or something. Do you ever post your stuff on Simstagram?”
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Just a few minutes later, Emma had taken a picture of my costume and was showing me how to create a profile for my designs. I was overwhelmed. I always thought these girls were shallow and judgmental, had been almost afraid of them, but they seemed genuine.
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The girls pulled me to the dance floor with the others. I tried to follow their movements, feeling awkward and clumsy at first. But I soon realised that most of the others were also terrible dancers and we just laughed it off. I finally relaxed a little.
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Someone touched my shoulder and I spun around.
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“Hey. Dr. Llama, I presume?”
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It was Oscar. He was in the year above me, I knew of him from Myra’s classes. He was also wearing a blue suit with a yellow tie. I suddenly struggled to form words.
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“You’re Julia, right? Your outfit is spot on. My dad refused to let me paint any markings on his suit, so this is the best I could do.”
He gestured to his own costume.
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I finally recovered.
“Thanks. You still look great though. Only problem is, now one of us has to go home and change.”
Oscar laughed.
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“I don’t think anyone else even knows who I am supposed to be. So, uh, are you a big Quantum Llamas fan too?”
“Well, yes, but I actually picked this costume because Conrad Richards is my granddad.”
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“Really? That’s so cool! Hey, we should get a picture of our matching costumes, come on!”
He took my hand and dragged me towards the photo booth.
beginning / previous / next
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shebeafancyflapjack · 2 years ago
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"What are you doing here, Dutch?"
"Same as you, I suppose." (RDR2)
"You're just like me, John. You can't change who you are." (RDR1)
Okay I'm currently hyperfixated on these boys and I gotta talk about how fascinating this relationship is.
Because while Dutch and Arthur's relationship is heartbreaking, there's something even more crushing about Dutch and John over the course of both games.
To start we're told by both Arthur and Bill that John is the "favorite", that he's "Dutch's pet", "the golden boy", even Micah brings it up in chapter six. Part of Arthur's bitterness over John's return is how cool Dutch seemed to be about it, how he was welcomed back with open arms. However nearly all the interactions we see (or rather Arthur sees) between Dutch and John are very tense and grow more heated over the game until they're outright screaming at each other - and of course things get as bad as they can be in rdr1. But how I imagine things used to be, pre-Blackwater or pre-John's gap year, was Dutch did dote on John and John worshipped him in return. John seems to have been found the youngest that we know of, twelve years old, so he was as much of a child as can be, which allowed Dutch to mold him into a younger version of himself, whereas Arthur was clearly more Hosea's son. Dutch taught John to sound smart without really saying anything, while Arthur learned from Hosea to be smarter than he appeared. To compare the two, I think Arthur was Dutch's joy (the mirror of his best friend, his first son) but John was his pride (his own reflection). It's very typical narcissist parent behavior to latch onto the youngest or one that most resembles you most as they're the most obvious extension of yourself. And for as long as John obeyed and adored Dutch, that fuelled his own ego - fitting then how Dutch's mental decline runs in parallel to John drifting away and learning to be his own person, a father in his own right, and seeing who Dutch is without rose tinted glasses. And the stronger John gets, the more Dutch feels threatened, like when he accuses John of "wanting to be the General". Dutch is a loving granddad to Jack and caring to Abigail, encouraging John to be a good father, but not if it means they become more important than the gang (ie Him). I also think a lot of the insults Dutch hurls at John later on are things he could be partly saying about himself, how he doesn't have the grit, how he's always been weak or blind. The more Dutch fails, the more he targets John as a punching bag for his own failures, to the point of wanting to leave him to rot as he admits in one hidden BH scene.
Side note, this also feeds into his resentment of Arthur, firstly of also no longer being a yes man, but Dutch also notes how much Arthur sounds like Hosea - except Dutch was ignoring Hosea right from the start of the game, even if he did help keep Dutch grounded to some sense of reality, Arthur is a reminder of Dutch's recent loss and also insulted at the idea of Arthur replacing Hosea - that's not Arthur's job, in his mind, it's just to be his big scary grunt. Once he's becoming weaker, he doesn't see the purpose in having Arthur around if he's just going to question and possibly (if he believes Micah) betray him. And he writes Arthur off as dead anyway once he starts getting sick, he already lost Hosea, he's not putting himself through that again so it's easy to just leave him for dead. But despite all that, Arthur still loves Dutch enough to ride back and try one last time to convince his "father" that Micah is out to get him, he even spends his last breaths begging him to see sense - not for his own sake, but the man who raised him.
But with John it's a different, more raw tragedy that Dutch's self-loathing and insanity grow in their time apart, despite both clearly having had Arthur's shadow hanging over them, eventually pushing them to the exact same destination on the exact same day with the exact same purpose - to kill Micah. John has been haunted by guilt that Arthur had to sacrifice himself for him, while Dutch has been haunted by (imo) the guilt of leaving Arthur to die as well as allowing Micah to manipulate him. But both men are also not killing "for Arthur's sake" here, more their own, as they both know Arthur didn't agree with revenge. But they do it to try to ease their own consciences. For John it works, for Dutch it just sends him off into isolation and his eventual fate.
And the saddest thing is, John thanks him. Even after everything Dutch did to him and Abigail, he makes an attempt to reach out. There was a brief glimpse from John of the boy who loved his adoptive father, but Dutch's ice cold stare and silence remind them they can never go back to what was. And John let's him go. But this moment seems to change something in John's perspective, as earlier he had always said he believed Dutch had been hiding who he was the whole time, but by the time of RDR1 he's saying similar things as Sadie that Dutch was a good man who "went insane". He now wants to believe that there was a part of Dutch that cared, long ago, but it's now gone.
The Dutch that John eventually has to hunt down is different than the one he last saw on Mount Hagen, the one who admitted that he didn't have much to say anymore, the man who still cared enough to spare John and leave him the Blackwater money. Dutch is now a complete bloodthirsty monster who kills for sport, who openly calls Abigail a whore and Jack a whore's son - the same boy he once doted on, found a puppy with, that he rode into hell for. His disgust for John, his boy, working for the government, being the "rat" he feared him to be, is enough to get him to not hold back on shooting him anymore, but I also can't help but think most of his words are egging John on to get him. "You'll have to kill me, John!" he yells. But when it comes to just the two of them, both on a mountain yet again, they both put away their guns. It's the closest thing we get in the first game to a hint of their past relationship, of father and son, rather than adversaries. John's name, his "golden boy's" name, is the last thing to leave Dutch's lips before he falls. The speech the same one he said with Arthur at his side. As insane as he was, he spent those last moments thinking of his sons, and possibly Hosea too, before he fell, how he wasn't able to fight his own cowardly nature to do right by them, you can't change my mind.
And while John would never talk about it openly, its just awful to think how this man had to watch the father he loved and who doted on him back, to slowly become a monster, to hating each other, trying to kill each other, then to see a glimpse of what was but being unable to save him. It also adds context to his own behavior to Jack, how he tries to be a doting father but doesn't discourage him too much from having his own interests, as much as they confuse him.
And then, the final nail in this angst coffin, walking out to face his own death knowing Dutch was right, that they did just find another monster to come for.
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blatantprinterpropaganda · 1 month ago
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alright this is just the mad ramble of a brain fresh off of episode 8 but currently what i WANT to see happen in the final four episodes is. kan is working towards revenge and either the mysterious guy she's working with (who is presumably someone from the community of her old neighborhood) actually is a little evil but kan still has good intentions OR (preferably) he only seemed vaguely evil because of the way we were introduced to him now, but it's intentional, because it seems like the show is trying to trick us into taking the rich family's side and sympathizing with them at every turn at the moment. they're getting all this hate, they're such sweet people, they don't know what they're doing wrong. this is true for home, who is generally clueless and doesn't understand where his wealth comes from, but uncle somkid definitely Knows (and... i'm not convinced he's happy home survived? this got lost in the muddle a little but i'm pretty sure that response to the news on the phone was not a yay <3 one), and of course so does the lawyer (mr. big), but we all knew the lawyer was bad news from the start. then there's granddad, who i'm pretty sure is also a bad guy knowingly, but he thinks he's doing it For The Family (and his grandson, etc) so of course he doesn't see himself that way, and this Family Curse he's talking about essentially seems to be "nobody likes us, oh boohoo, we're so misunderstood" when what they seem to have done is flatten a neighborhood where people were living to gentrify it/build some construction project that made the family a lot of money. so now home, who knows his grandfather as this nice loving silly guy with a lot of jokes, is on the task to lift his family's Curse and restore their reputation - but what does that mean? fighting the bad guys, who are the people who had their neighborhood razed to the ground? so. what i WANT is for home-peach-pangpang to work on this task of home's for an episode or two while actively trying to oppose kan, who they think has gone to the dark side, until they realize she is the one fighting the good fight even if she's going into it very hard - and either she makes amends for that itty bitty murder attempt (though i don't think she meant to hit home with that at any point), OR we'll learn it was never her work in the first place and this was another misdirection, which i honestly think makes more sense perhaps. i could fully imagine the next episode giving us another twist that tells us it was uncle somkid behind the accident, because again, we know he's doing bad stuff, he's been too kind and cool, and he didn't seem particularly happy to know home survived - AND he was the one trying to get home to drink alcohol before telling him to get into a car. either way though. parts of this episode seemed dangerously set up to be a plot that goes "these rich people aren't so bad, they don't deserve this hate" but dear god, i hope i'm reading this right and that's not where we're headed, because not only would that make less sense, it would also be unhinged (and very sad) if they went for that note with this series. i think we're good though. i do think we'll probably be okay.
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mixnmatch4dead · 1 year ago
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Hellooo 🥺 politely asking for a Coach and Bill mashup
It’s been 6 months exactly since my last upload, sorry for the wait! I admit there was a bit of a reason for the delay on this one… I actually didn’t advertise mash-ups.
Swaps are when one character takes on the character role of another, while mash-ups are the two characters as one person. I wasn’t sure if i should draw Bill as Coach or Coach as Bill, and I didn’t want to disappoint. I do have experience in making mashups/fusions, though, so I figured I might as well give what you asked for, since I thought it would be cool even if it was a misunderstanding… and since I made you wait for so long….. I mashed the whole casts of l4d1&2 into… i guess left 4 dead one-and-a-half?
Say Hi to the Left 4 Dead Mash-Ups Line-up! (Ordered by height, tallest to shortest)
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Since this asker also pointed out that they were interested in mashing their personalities specifically in the past, I’ll also go into detail on how I picture them acting ^^ I also did doodles anytime i got tired or stuck with the mash-ups, you can also find them under the cut <3
Coach+William Overbeck (Mashup name… Vet?) -
Perspective : This vet is very kind-spirited but very protective of the trio he finds himself working with. He wants to see all of them make it to the other side, and if that means risking his own life, he’s ready to put it on the line. He expresses this by frequently checking on the health and well-being of the others, commanding them around in dire situations, putting his body between his pinned teammates and the infected if he has to, and teaching them survival skills that help outside of combat, in case they wind up without him.
Granddad Friend? : Since the second-oldest person on the team is deceptively irresponsible, he’s completely taking the slack of the caretaker role for the whole dang team. He is willing to be mean and go above the others if he thinks they’re being irresponsible with their own lives. Like Bill, he is fully willing to leave people behind so long as the three are safe, and also like Bill he WILL minimize your injuries a little if it means you keep moving forward. (“If you’re not bleeding out, you’re not allowed to cry” moments)
Humor : Like Coach, he’s got good humor when the situation calls for it… as soon as things get serious, though, he drops the jokes and smiles entirely. He’ll make jokes about his favorite foods and whatever silly situation deserves a little chuckle, so long as everyone is alive and well for it. Sure, comedy heals all wounds, but sometimes you need to focus and get out of the situation before you can try to fix things. He has a BIG laugh and is very receptive when the others joke with each other.
Religion : A practicing Christian like Coach, he will sometimes mention it when he feels the situation calls for it (including chastising people for cursing despite swearing ALL the time. Bill says Bitch a lot, but Coach says Shit more than anyone else in the game!)— I could see him doing other things like the ‘valley of the shadow of death’ prayer from the Swamp Campaign.
School Colors? : Admittedly inaccurate, there’s not a single school in Georgia with a green and purple color scheme. In my defense, Coach’s school is three hours away from Savannah and he keeps saying he “lives around here” in the beginning first campaign, so...
Medical History : With Bill and Coach’s combined histories and backgrounds, they’re in a bit of a worse condition than either were originally. Bill, with his injury in the war and age, combined with Coach’s knee injury that was bad enough to knock him out of sports… It’s never specified which knees either injured, but I actually considered cutting one off entirely in case they hurt the same one. This is all without mentioning Bill’s canon PTSD, which carried over since this is a combination of both characters. He uses a variety of things to improve his mobility and comfort, sometimes even using a wheelchair when they’re available and someone else on the team is willing to carry it when the landscape becomes inaccessible.
Smoking : An addiction he took steps to successfully break a long, long time ago to be a good example to the students he taught. He only started again when he realized… this really was the end of the world has he knew it. It helps with the pain in his joints, too. He still refuses giving any to the other three.
Nick+Francis (Mashup name probably Frick) -
Perspective : A gambler and a biker with a bit of a history of getting into scrapes and other dangerous situations, he has learned absolutely no lessons except when to start running away. In past experiences, he found he was better off working on his own, and brushed off positive experiences with teams as ‘only a matter of time’ or exceptions. He usually just looks out for himself, but he’s realizing that this situation genuinely requires cooperation… and that he likes knowing that the others are there for him.
Infected! : While we know all of the protagonists are carriers, we don’t actually know if all of them have caught the green flu before they all meet! However, since Francis and Nick are suggested to have a very similar intro to the apocalypse, it’s very VERY likely that Mr. Frick here is the first of the group to actually carry the disease, and that he catches it before the infection becomes a local problem.
Irresponsible : He will immediately use something on a whim if he’s trusted with anything. This includes eating any snacks in his bag, drinking all the water in a bottle meant for the group, and taking pills on an instinct the first moment something bothers him. Is it selfishness? Not really, he just doesn’t think when he thinks he’s been provided a quick fix.
Graying : He is actively graying and it would be visible if he didn’t dye it… though he kind of got the wrong color. He doesn’t want to talk about it.
Picking Favorites? : He has a favorite teammate, and he only pretends he doesn’t because it means he likes them in general. His favorite is Rochelle&Louis by a long shot, mostly because they’re the most fun to talk to and seem to be on the same wavelength as him. But in like… a way that balances him out. It confuses him.
Rochelle+Louis (Mashup name likely Louchelle bc i like it) -
Perspective : To this mash-up, there is always a silver lining, even if you have to force it into existence. The power of positive thinking can go a long way, and they’ll be the first to remind the team pessimists that though this is the end of the world it isn’t the end. And then they get roasted for saying that, and have to verbally fight for their life.
Sarcasm and Banter : They will meet every roast with an equal or slightly greater burn. Bickering with Nick+Francis usually ends with a verbal murder on one of their sides, and they’re kind of lucky both of them are so quick to laugh it off.
Need for Normality : Out of all of the mash-ups, they’re the most insistent that they continue following the pre-apocalypse rules as well. That does not mean they’re always considering it, like they’ll trespass like crazy and take when they need it, but they don’t like it when their teammates steal from homes or small businesses. It kind of hurts to imagine the family that they’re taking from, even if they’re likely all dead.
Theater Kid : They can PROJECT like nobody’s business! They’re so good at making sure their voice carries, it’s kind of hard to stop! Which is bad when there’s a witch in the area, but boy can they verbalize when they have a problem of some kind. Also, from a history of being the one to manage things on a stage, they’re incredibly good at rephrasing Bill’s directions when he’s a bit more vague.
Anxiety : Quick to startle, easy to concern, and overall the most generally confused by the more hectic natures of the other three. They don’t understand why the others are so ready to just drop everything and make the worst choice just for the hell of it, but it is NOT helping their fears.
Ellis+Zoey (Mashup name either Elley or Zellis) -
Perspective : A college student considering dropping out and relieved that now they don’t have to think about it anymore! They’re happiest when they’re not thinking about anything— especially not have screwed over the world’s gotten. Any reminder of how they don’t know the situation their closest friends are in (and likely saw their family die) will close them off from the group, making them snippy and reserved until the others can get the humor back into them. It’s not intentional, it’s depression and fear for the future. They’re always ready to call the Francis&Nick mash-up for his bullshit.
Apocalypse Prep : What Zoey and Ellis have in common is that they had very similar reactions to learning about the Green Flu— that being shutting off the world and preparing the only way they knew how. While Zoey consumed a bunch of zombie movies in a depressed fugue state until her parents died when the infection became public, Ellis tricked-up a truck and used it to ram into zombies until one almost killed him, and their mash-up was probably doing both.
Short but Mighty! : Smallest of the team but can absolutely hold just about every other team member over their head. They’d absolutely love to show off how many gasoline canisters they can carry at one time, then trip and spill everything everywhere. Probably said they could beat a charger at an arm wrestling contest once.
Keith Stories : Expanded to include other friends and family members, this mash-up keeps Keith and will talk about him and others all the time.
Team Child : Are they 21? Yes, but do they act like it? Not really. It’s easier to see them as a teenager than a student with a full-time job, especially since they never act like it. Their open gullibility does not help.
I’d add more notes, but I’ve been doing this for awhile and I still have finals due. As I mentioned before, I’ve done mash-ups in the past and I had a LOT of fun doing them again, so if there are any other mash-ups you’d be interested in, I’d love to hear it! (Difference between mash-ups and swaps: you can mash more than two people at once…) I still have finals the day this is going to be posted, but that also means I have break for the next three weeks!
Doodles I mentioned before below!
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daenystheedreamer · 1 year ago
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pls more abt viserys Omaegorverse I'm so fascinated it's insane and i honestly think grrm would b proud
im so happy u love it and this means so much but i do NOT think he would be proud 😭 he would read my posts (gun to his head ofc he wouldnt just. do that.) and sit in silence for a few minutes and then he would say. Maegor isnt gay what are you talking about. and i go well thats not really the point and anyway sexuality is kinda fluid and its more about opportunity and power than about sexual attraction although i will concede- and then he sends elio and linda with spears to hunt me down.
he's canonically a nothing character with personality of 'Beloved Of The Commons' n nothing else so i can kinda do whatever tf i want with him which is fun. he's also mostly there to be a sad wet cat that gets kicked by everyone and everyone he loves dies or is weird about him in some way. he's my special little sad uke twink i brutalise for my personal entertainment <3 im so maegorcoded so tyannacoded... anyway more about my babyboy viserys below<3 warning its SOOO long like fifteen fucking paragraphs Jesus christ
trigger warnings for like everything. incest death depression mental instability murder psychosis uhhh. torture and suicide. just all of it do NOT read unless youre like super certain you wanna read about my deviantart OCs because guys it is NOT worth it
childhood pre-Torture Labyrinth. he's born in 29 AC and was 8-ish when he was at the deathbed of Aegon1. aegon the uncrowned is three years older than him, and rhaena is six years older. jaehaerys is 5 years younger, alysanne is 7 years younger vaella who i kept alive is 10 years younger. just to give an idea of ages and general canon info :>
his only personality trait is Promising and Beloved of the commons. i think him and aegon were friends :) younger brother so he followed after him a lot. slightly scared of rhaena the big cool older sister who has a pet dragon. think his granddad is soooo cool doesnt really think about The Implications of conquest or anything. normal boy normal childhood (as normal as possible when ur siblings are married...) also he is gay because it adds to the horrors later on 🥰
something i think is Inchresting is the rhaena, aegon and viserys are named for rhaenys, aegon and visenya :3 i think viserys is like hercules right where he was named in an attempt to appease The Wife. aenys was like hiiiii auntie/stepmum visenya look i named a kid after you you dont wanna kill me right?right? and she looks at this kid who didnt claim a dragon isnt a girl isnt maegor and goes oh so youre insulting me huh.
i think rhaena aegon viserys had a slightly weird dynamic. rhaena the lesbian getting forcibly betrothed to her younger brother by her father is gonna make things weird, also aegon was 15 and rhaena 18 which adds just the best most awesome sauce to the mix. i think viserys had very complicated feelings on that especially if he is gay cos like... rhaena obviously does not love her brother romantically right. so u are a boy and ur sister is a lesbian but you dont have that word. and you are gay and your brother is cool and the crown prince and everyone is screwing their siblings and that makes your brain chemistry weird. and now your brother is marrying your gay sister. What about you. the dragon has three heads??? idk he's like 12 at this point he just goes back to playing hide and seek with jae+aly.
Uh oh daddy's dead. daddy's dead and uncle maegor is king now with his three wives. Uh oh. oh awesome he's kidnapped you and you're his squire now that's so cool. well its mostly a power play and hes not actually making u do anything as long as you stay locked in the red keep all day he leaves you alone. also maegor's insane girlfriend stares at you like you're a baby lamb that would make a delicious lamb tostada. but hey your big brother aegon has a dragon now and him and rhaena are gonna save you soon. Uh oh aegon's dead. aegon's dead and maegor is king for real for real.
everyone steers clear of you in the keep. you used to play with your siblings and the commoners and you used to play on dragonstone and kings landing and now no one wants to touch you. no one is calling you maegor's squire now, the pretence is gone. you are maegor's hostage. you fantasise about a different outcome, where maegor took you to the battle as his squire, and that you being there might have changed what happened. maybe you could have warned aegon. but you know nothing would have changed. youre not a dragonrider. you're worthless you're powerless. youre 14 years old :)
alys harroway is dead. maegor killed his wife. you knew alys, you saw her around the keep. she seemed very nice. she was very quiet and stayed in her rooms. she was always pregnant. you wonder why she married maegor, why she and tyanna are so strange with each other. you hear rumours. you wish you had talked to her. but she's dead now. maegor killed her. maegor tortured her. she's a whore now. you look out the window and see her rotting leg on a stake outside, her torso on another. you wish you had talked to her.
visenya targaryen the looming shadow over your life, the woman you're named after who looked at you with nothing but scorn, is dead. your mother is gone and she took jae and aly. what about you? what about you? is she not your mother too? are you not her little boy anymore? you are 15 years old. maegor killed alys' family when he was angry with her. is he going to kill you now?
ok second person pov over the gimmick is getting lame. anyway this is where the AU deviates: instead of viserys dying of torture, maegor is like hey maybe my nephew will be more fertile than my BITCH wives. and visenya the blood witch before her death compiled a bunch of old valyrian a/b/o fanfiction and said son if you ever find yourself with infertile wives. Consult These Texts. then tyanna and maegor made viserys mpreggable i dont care about how or like. what his body looks like. im not into the fetish of omegaverse LMAO i dont want to think about the fertilisation or birthing process or what organs he has thats unnecessary. only thing thats important is viserys can incubate babies and they are birthed via c-section :3
quick lore dump: vis is forced to maegor -> rhaena crashes the wedding but vis is so broken at this point he just doesnt want anyone else to die and has resigned himself to maegor so rhaena reluctantly surrenders -> alyssa jae and aly DO go to the red keep after they find out about the wedding and jae dies fighting maegor which makes viserys fully break -> alyssa now has husband dead 2 kids dead her son is queen and she also loses her fight :( lives on dragonstone with alive vaella -> alysanne is given to the faith -> rhaena agrees to a truce and she is hand of the king now and viserys' main protector -> vis gets pregnant and the kid is basically a reincarnation of jaehaerys -> tyanna loses her shit and tries to murder/sterilise/whatever viserys so maegor kills her cos he's finally got his babymaker -> vis has a daughter who's the reincarnation of tyanna -> faith uprising, shut down -> vis has his second daughter final child daenys who's birth is heralded by the martyrdom of poxy jeyne poor in the quashed faith uprising
vis is in the torture labyrinth for a couple decades. life sucks husband sucks everyone is weird about him. very death in venice people are weird about the boy type deal. has to wade through gender and sexuality politics of westeros which means several men going utterly insane about him including a couple kingsguard knights (celibate hypermasculine freaks bound to be insane sexually). one point early-ish on he DOES start believing this one kingsguard knight will save him from The Hells The Horrors but maegor finds out and kills that guy adn sexually humiliates viserys in front of the kingsguard and makes their son watch. So that fucks up vis' psyche for a while :3
rhaena and alysanne try to convince him to rebel and run away that they will use their dragons and fight. but maegor has made vis so paranoid and crazy he thinks maegor knows everything knows all his thoughts so he's terrified of plotting escape cos he thinks maegor will kill everyone. plus maegor made sure to force kids onto him early so that vis wouldnt be able to leave :3 world's most evil babytrap of all time.
vis doesnt interact with anyone except rhaena aly maegor his kids and the kingsguard so yeah its bad for him. ceryse hangs around for a while but shes like yeah i dont want any part of this shit dude being queen is NAWT worth it and she goes back to the hightower to plot marrying her niece off to maegor's son.
also there's a curse on the kingsguard all of them die really horribly and early. its a fun little thing for me personally because in f&b maegor's kinsguard is cartoonishly bad and jae's is cartoonishly perfect so i though Hey what if we did a little curse on the kingsguard ey. that would be fun. the only guy who stays long is a bracken because brackenfail cancels out knightfail. he's all godly and pissy about the gay marriage thing but he's also a monarchist so even though he think maegor is satan he's like well. he is my king i must serve him i obey my vows. he thinks viserys is a freak of nature but slowly grows to respect him and helps kill maegor + takes the fall for it. they have a weird father figure/white knight/weird tension thing that never gets consummated yay ^_^ the maegor torture labyrinth will have you 21 years old and best friends with a 50 year old celibate knight like dang where tf ser bracken at today 🥹
viserys snaps in 66AC with no like big catalyst or anything. he just has a good day where he's mostly lucid and he's angry and he's tired of everything and he's sick of maegor and he wants freedom he wants to be free. he wants to breath the air without panicking that maegor is going to hurt him. and maegor says some disgusting comment to him while theyre alone in the throne room and vis just snaps and start fighting him. daenys shows up cos she had her own Visions and Voices and they just start whaling on him. bracken knight helps too he takes most of maegor's counter attacks his organs are all over the floor but maegor dies impaled on the throne YAY
vis is like. A bit better for a while. his son is now king and vis is seeing that oh it doesnt get better does it people will still die. also his son jae has this weird oedipus complex about him thanks to maegor's insane parenting and viserys is fully aware of that so its not fun times for him. jae and daenys try to make him better try to invent therapy but its the middle ages they dont have that yet. they finally send him off to harrenhal (BAD IDEA) because they think viserra (the elder daughter btw, the tyanna one) might be able to cure him with her weird witchcraft. they think she's insane too but its the last option... viserra thinks vis is lame and weak but she does love him in ehr own way or maybe just pities him. anyway she does her best and it works for a while but viserys sorta gives up cos the depression is too much. and viserra believes in euthanasia as a mercy and thinks this is best for him this will let him be at peace. daenys has a premonition about it and tries to stop him. she has a big blowout fight with jae about it too and curses his bloodline and prophesises the long night. burned the red keep a little bit, you know how it is.
blah blah blah anyway daenys and vis end up dying in the gods eye together in a murder/suicide suicide/suicide murder/murder whatever. viserra has the lake dragged and they're found holding each other like a mother and her fetus :3
Fucks sake this post is long. holy shit holy fuck. my fucking bad guys my bad im so sorry. Holy shit. anyway thats my deviant art oc tee hee ^_^
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everybody-loves-purdy · 10 months ago
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Question isn't hollyleaf, ivypool, lionblaze, shadowsight, beenose, (I want to mention clearsky/skystar but I don't think he really is), nightheart (asc), squirrelflight, ashfur, crowfeather, nightcloud, frecklewish (thunderclan), needletail, frostpaw, etc maybe more characters are the closest thing to what a grey morally character was even if it not written good. But closest so far?
Out of those, given what we know of her, I would say Frecklewish is definitely morally grey. Unless of course the Erins being out a novella showing her version of events and she rubs her paws together gleefully and snickers “die kittens die” as she watches the kits drown lol
Out of the rest I would say Hollyleaf, Beenose, and Needletail are the closest but they also worked hard to get redeemed. Hollyleaf murdered someone who was going to cause her and her family harm (cool motive, still murder) but she did later regret it and try and make amends with Ashfur. And Needletail and Beenose did not realise quite how bad the kin was until it was too late, but still took part in some shitty actions, but they were also teenagers during a significant portion of it.
Ashfur is villainous, I think the only grey thing about him is is pelt lol
Ivypool was a case where as Ivypaw she was definitely more grey but once she realised the harm her actions were doing and realised she was being manipulated and used she firmly became good.
Lionblaze is overall good but he does have dark moments, but he acts (intentionally) out of goodness even if he says or thinks things that would be contrary.
Shadowsight and Frostpaw I would say anything they did wrong was due to manipulation and/or inexperience. They only wanted to pursue good and fully believed their actions were that. I think the worst action between the two was Shadowsight letting Ashfur go but he was being manipulated by this guy for months and spent the rest of the arc trying to make up for this mistake.
Nightheart I just think was bratty, he didn’t really have many stakes in the battle of good vs evil until now but even as Flamepaw he wanted to help his granddad
Squirrelflight I think she just made a mistake by not telling Brambleclaw about the kids, but that is something that StarClan said not to do. I don’t think she can be faulted for following the will of her ancestors. It would be a different conversation if the whole thing happened without StarClan intervening, but as it stands she was just following a direct order from her religion.
Crowfeather is morally good I feel, just an asshole.
And I think Nightcloud is morally good too, but was just having marriage problems when we saw her at her worse, she’s a lot happier and calmer when not married to Crowfeather. She was just under emotional strain/distress I feel. And I think her part in Mudclaw’s rebellion was out of true belief that he was still deputy.
Circling back to Skystar, yeah he’s definitely a bad person. I think he becomes grey after his “redemption” he gets slightly more of a moral compass, enough to stop murdering people and kicking out babies and the disabled (what a high bar he has set for himself), but he still remains utterly selfish and arrogant and antagonistic. So I would say that post “redemption” Skystar is grey but he’s really close to the line of villain again.
That’s just my opinion anyway
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purpleplaid17 · 11 months ago
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Jess Watches // Tues 9 Jan // Day 109 Synopses & Favourite Scenes & Poll
The Resident (with mum) 2x21 Stuck as Foretold
When the hospital has a severe blood shortage, Conrad must try every avenue to save a patient's life. Nic receives devastating news and is left worrying about her sister's health. Elsewhere, Kit considers the future of her intertwining relationships and Bell has an encounter with a woman from his past.
The frat bros not being homophobic but just thinking their homie can do better. 🤜🏻🤛🏽 And Conrad casually asking him about his relationship was a nice bit of normalcy still lacking in gay-friendly media. It was also nice to learn more about AJ, and to see Mina laugh so loudly.
Frasier (with mum) 5x15 Room Service
An unexpected visit from Lilith stirs old passions in Frasier and new ones in Niles.
Dr. Lilith was breathtakingly beautiful this ep. The dress was more like lingerie but she made it work. And I like the usual up-do but her hair loose and wavy was a sight to behold. Is Bebe a dancer? Because the way she pointed her toes and moved around the hotel room was very graceful. She was right to say she wasn't wrong.
Eureka (rw) 2x07 Family Reunion
Fargo's grandfather is discovered in a cryo-stasis chamber, but no one can determine how he got in there. Elsewhere, Zoe pursues another mystery involving her dad and a dozen roses.
Jo broke way too easily. I think she wanted Carter to find the girly magazine so she can do the quizzes with him. Is his HS gf dying in a car crash relevant later? I can't remember and it seemed random information. Also, it was sweet that Fargo finally got to spend time with his Granddad
The Dragon Prince 5x09 Infantis Sanguine (Season Finale)
While Zubeia fights for her life and Viren arrives at a crossroads, the race toward Aarvos' prison leads those who seek him deep beneath the waves.
Felt more like a mid-season finale tbh, which I'm not mad about. It's nice they're not having to rush the ending knowing s6 is already a go. The underwater bit was so cool. I'd love to temprarily have gills. Probably wouldn't go much deeper than snorkelling lol but it'd be a magical experience. I will never feel sympathy for Viren. But Claudia is still worth saving. The contrast between siblings is fascinating. I hope they get some sort of reunion. Also, Miyana being organized and liked enough to raise an army, yet then giving it so readily to Karim. Please just go away.
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deadboyfriendd · 11 months ago
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I've seen you mention that you're studying graphic design and for some reason I had it in my head that you studied English or followed a writing course. I think it's because your writing and your style always makes me feel like I'm reading a published novel. Hardcover honey. It's so well put together and I've really enjoyed reading all the recent anon asks about your wips and past works. The level of thought and detail you discussed in those alone blew me away. Are you self taught?
Hi anon!
First off, THANK YOU SO MUCH for the reading and all of the love. I literally can't think about people reading and liking my work too much or else I will start crying. It means SO much to me.
Yes! I am currently getting my BS in Graphic Design, but I do have an AA in Liberal Studies and a second AA in discretional honors from when I thought I wanted to be a nurse, got into the honors program at my community college, and got all the way through nursing school before I decided I wanted to be an artist!
I am self-taught! Writing has always just kind of been something that comes naturally, but that isn't to say that I haven't had a ton of practice working on this website. When I read back through some of my stuff from my Wattpad days and read back through some of my stuff even from a year ago on here, I am so surprised to see how much and how quickly I was able to grow as a writer when I didn't see that kind of growth on any other platform I've ever written for. A big part of this can be credited to @dr-aculaaa in our little writer's room. Her work pushed me to be the greatest writer I can be and Drac is always my go-to!
I think the first time I ever got recognition for my writing was in the 7th grade, and I just didn't stop! I was a weird kid and really insecure with myself so when I was good at something like writing or art, I tried to capitalize on it and milk it for all it was worth because I thought it would make people like me, but, as an adult, I write largely for myself now. My great granddad was a published author and he wrote westerns! I didn't know this until after I wrote Cochise!
I also had a couple of really great teachers and some really great college courses that I think helped me out quite a bit. My middle school english teacher (who I still talk to!) really encouraged me to continue working with writing and art. I was also his TA for four years so he was able to fuel my flame for reading, writing, art, and music! He is also part of the reason why I became a teacher and I can only dream of being half the teacher he is.
In college, I took a couple of really cool electives, Theatre History, Witchcraft and Heresy in Europe, Art History, and The Politics of Punk to name a few. It really helped me expand my worldview and fueled my love of writing because writing is also largely a reading and researching process for me!
As far as my actual writing process, I write about the things that make me happy and largely, I write about myself and my own experiences. In reality, my cochise universe is a culmination for my love of Tombstone, my love for my desert home, my passion for westerns, and the fact that I was watching a LOT of yellowstone at that time. Just like Stone Gothic came out right after that class on Witchcraft and when Drac was talking to me about monsterfucking lol! I write about the things I've seen and the things I've stored in my brain. I think the reason it takes me so long to get anything out is because, when I feel like getting really descriptive and getting in the zone, I pretend I'm standing there with a macrolense and think about what I'm seeing or feeling, how someone else can be feeling that, and how I've felt when something similar happens. I also think about how I've read about how other characters feel in similar events!
My love for writing also ultimately comes from my love of reading, if you scroll down a little on my page I have a couple of lists of books that have really inspired me! When I see prose I like I try to write like that, and its always going to come out in my own way- which I have learned to be okay with.
Ultimately, my entire relationship with writing is this weird pieced-together mosiac of learning how to deal with myself and my life experiences, catharsis, my desperate need to be creating something, my love for reading and learning, and also my constant craving for validation and praise.
I'd be happy to talk about this all you want, anon! Thanks for reading and letting me spew these thoughts all over the dash!
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besidesitstoowarm · 1 year ago
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"The Voyage of the Damned" thoughts
put this off forever bc i didn't want to see it. in the end it was fine even if i keep mixing the title up with "planet of the dead"
ten slaying in his tux-with-converse look that had the 2007 girlies in a chokehold. troy bolton wears the same thing in high school musical 3 btw. if you even care. he gets interested in the angel statues that to me look like craghas "crabfeeder" drahar from hit hbo drama "house of the dragon". do you think the doctor would support the greens or the blacks
we meet max capricorn who is the most "john waters from wish" looking person i've ever seen. and max capricorn as a name sounds like a discount drag name. i like that everyone is wearing 10s-20s era clothing, the mix of titanic-era set dressing with typical sci-fi machinery actually blends really nicely. the two "low class" contest winners are in cowboy clothing which i also like since a lot of the nouveau riche around the turn of the century were oil millionaires from out west (in america anyway). they seem extremely nice and i would love to hang out at a buffet with them
the doctor flirts with kylie minogue, who actually does a really good job in the role, she's very wide-eyed and charming and the character felt fully realized. doctor who is really good at one-offs. he offers a "brand new sky" and she takes it and off to london where we meet WILFRED MOTT, MY GRANDDAD!!!! i completely forgot he was in this one. i screamed "GRANDDAD" when he appeared and scared my bf
the captain is on a suicide mission and apologizes to alonso. i have never seen alonso's actor in anything but he looks so familiar. the actor is gay btw. i loved the captain's "they promised me old men" speech, he's dying and needed the bribe money to take care of his family once he's gone but he was trying to limit the collateral damage to his crew ASTEROID ATTACK
we learn that the doctor is 903 years old. i think this is the first time his age is stated? nine had the whole "900 years of time and space" but i'd assumed he was just rounding. does he celebrate his birthday? i love the idea that he has no idea how old he is and is just guessing. the second doctor was canonically ~450. anyway they're trying to navigate the ship and the cowboy couple try to repair a broken angel bc they were like mechanics back home. i think it's interesting that in sci-fi, robots are stuff for poor people
cyborgs were recently granted rights and "can even get married" which is nice for them. the doctor says "you should see me in the morning" and astrid says "okay" and he looks like he stuck a fork in a socket. they're both sooo down bad this ep. i'd like to have seen her as a companion for a few episodes, adam-style except adam sucked and astrid is cool
max capricorn is a head in a jar. i'm not kidding that this is the exact same twist as the movie "prometheus" did ridley scott steal that from this episode?? it's the same goddamn thing. that movie was awful. i rejoiced when astrid killed him with a forklift, barbara-style (running over bad guys is always barbara-coded for me). the doctor brings the tour guide professor to london cause he's a millionaire on earth and he just like. cries with joy cause he can have a HOUSE with a DOOR and a GARDEN and DISHES and wow he's just like me fr. he refuses to take him with him cause he "travels alone" tenth doctor voice what kind of time lord takes a companion you can't fuck
this episode was in memory of verity lambert who had recently died when it was released. i had no idea who she was last time i saw this episode so i never noticed that. always famous to me verity <3
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jeeliean · 9 months ago
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A letter and a story, addressed to someone who will never read it. (also titled 'donuts')
when i think of my grandfather, i can only bear to think of the man i knew when i was younger.
he was many things - a baker, an entertainer, a chainsmoker, a man of many gifts. he laughed, clapped along when i would dance in their house on chinese new year for an angpao; never forgetting to give me a new toy or stuffed animal whenever i visited.
how long ago were those days? when the sheer amount of stuffed animals collected dust that triggered my asthma. when they had to be bagged up and donated to a nearby orphanage. and in the blink of an eye, all my minnie mouses, winnie the poohs, barney the big purple dinosaurs - all gone in bags to be enjoyed by other children. i dont remember my parents ever telling him they were given away; all that remained were my barbie dolls.
i fondly remember us baking together. we made donuts, loaves of bread, and my favorite: chocolate, cheese and cream baked all in one heavenly loaf. he'd prepare the dough, and i'd top it with ingredients (rather haphazardly... i was five). i helped use the hot press to seal the bread in the plastic packaging, and by nine he'd don that red velvet hat of his and bike to the morning market to sell his creations. oftentimes when my school bus would be en route home, my friends would point out,
"hey, who's that old man on his with donuts in the back seat? and in that funny red hat, too!"
those leftover, unsold donuts he'd often take home to share with the rest of us. i used to love riding my bike to his house and bring a few back as a little treat after dinner. it became my after-school ritual. id say my hellos to my grandmother, eat a little bit of her cooking, and be on my way back, with at least three donuts in tow.
in primary i'd beam with pride and tell everyone he was my grandfather. he wasn't like most grandfathers in our time - he didn't have any memory or mobility issues, he was a cool granddad. he fed me donuts and let me have as many chocolate sprinkles i wanted, often giving me a spoon to dig into the can. most of the stories i heard from my friends were that their grandfathers were distant, detached, or just gone. in a way that i knew was morally wrong, i felt superior to them knowing how i could share how comfortable i was with him around.
in middle school, i started felt awkward, as most teens do at that age. the people on the bus were new and as a result, most of them didn't know who he was. at times they'd be watching people on the streets and point him out because of his fire-truck red hat, but i'd always keep my mouth shut. i felt embarassed about everything at this age. who didn't? but God, i wish i still maintained that childlike pride of calling him my grandfather. month by month, clubs and homework began to consume me. no longer did i have the time to bike around my neighbourhood, visit my grandparents' house. i didn't even feel the rift growing between us. i was too caught up in superficial friendship drama, being used, and manipulated.
i dont remember exactly what year it was - i think it might've been my first year of high school when he fell. he hit his head on the floor at home. my dad and uncle were there in a flash. right from the get go, they told me and my brother it was bad. he slipped into a coma for a while and woke up with 20 years of his memory wiped. he could barely speak, walk, or even look up.
i never visited him while he was in the hospital. i tried to make myself feel better by telling myself it was pandemic regulations, but i knew in my heart i was just neglecting him. i still played the dutiful granddaughter in helping retrieve his lab tests, brain scans, and the like with my mother when needed. i was completely checked out. i thought i was so important in high school, with my responsibilities volunteering, being a part of the student council, etc. how stupid i had been. instead of going to visit him when my brother, mother and father did, i waved it off or said "next time" in favour of going to meetings and hangouts with my shiny new high school friends.
thankfully he had gotten better, but never to be able to make a full recovery. on top of his head trauma, his chainsmoking over the years had further deteriorated his physical health. once he was home i visited him once - and he didn't even remember my name. i felt my younger self shatter into a million little pieces, desperately searching for the warmth that glowed from behind his eyes.
"kamu anak siapa?" he'd ask, a thousand-yard stare boring into the wall behind me.
i laughed it off. too many of my extended family was there for me to look hurt. "aku anak aming, kongkong. jilly," i'd say with a light chuckle, like i was just letting him off easy. he's old, i'd tell myself. he's just old. not demented.
he'd cough and wheeze, with that signature smoker's rasp inflected in his response. "oh, jilly. anak aming."
he pretended he remembered, but do you know how people feign recognition when they try to recall how they know someone? that "oh, them!" tone. maybe it's his age, but there was no "feigning" his recognition of me at all. it was monotone, and my name didn't invoke a sense of belonging anymore. i felt crushed.
after that incident, we'd only ever visit every chinese new year. my brother kept going because somehow, my granddad remembers the sons. typical traditional chinese family mindset. however, i couldve put in more effort. i couldve taught him how to remember in the hospital, like everyone else did. i was so stupid.
last year, he finally passed. i didn't have much to say. most of my affection for him i deemed insignificant when compared to the actual effort shown by other members of my family.
i was there for the funeral. i couldnt make it to when they spread his ashes in the sea. from kongkong, i learned one thing. this was a lesson i thought i had learned long ago, something i kept stored away in the back of my mind. the universe reminded me to keep it fresh with his passing. never take people for granted.
after his fall, i checked out of our once-strong bond entirely. it was too painful to see him in that state and i thought myself unworthy to try and make amends when it had already taken such a bitter turn for the worse. i felt powerless at the hands of fate. i didn't even try. i was fighting other problems then - boys, my own mental health, my grades. my demented grandfather was barely a priority until he wasn't there anymore.
now, his loss still strikes a chord within me. it resonates everything i couldve done better, everything i shouldve been grateful for. instead, they're all regrets.
every month or so id think about him. nostalgia would always wash over me followed by a crashing wave of guilt. then id move on to my next thought, with the guilt being too much to bear while i was doing other things.
i wish i had done more. i wish i never let us drift apart in the first place. when i think of you, i still smell the golden, crisp donuts fresh out of the fryer. every time i eat from a bakery, i think of you. in every chocolate sprinkle, in every chocolate-cheese bread loaf.
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cpanther · 1 year ago
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K&K Book 2 exert 3
Let's try this writing thing again. In the mean time enjoy this exert
The two found both the teens and Bone Breaker talking to the sargent. “No their free to leave. Ah thank you.” he took the bags. “What did you find?”
“Boys are accounted for, they made all their classes. She stopped going after lunch, I’d say she was killed right around then. Something odd about her class load, they were all advanced, the sort of thign a last year student might take. What year was she?”
“Ah, third, a year above us.”
% nodded. “Dad Bone Breakers was kidding right, she’s not…” He looked at the floor but the blood had been removed. “She wasn’t twenty one.”
Konya sighed. “‘Fraid so. Why she was here is the question.”
“One we’ll get to the bottom of. As long as her last name was correct we’ll find her. Excuse me I have to see how my officer is coming along.”
“Come on, Konya we’ll meet you at Hungry Buffet. Bone Breaker?”
thew other teifling nodded. “yes I think I shall. There are some things we should discuss Mr. young Icedam.”
The snow elf glared as Konya hurried after the sargent so he could advice him on his best course of action. “Just Kalor.” Still it felt good to be recognized as an adult even if he did remind him that he was still a younger Icedam.
In the car Kalor groaned. At least the sun had gone down but that hadn’t helped cool the car any. “Why do they never have shade.” he turned the AC up while he cracked a window to help the hot air move longer faster.
% got into the passenger side while ^ took but the back. The two had worked things out so that they each got a turn up front and without Kalor having to mediate. On the way back ^ would ride up front with him. He wouldn’t be shocked if % opted to ride back with Konya so he could still be up front like he preferred. “Dad why did you hire a lawyer for us?”
“A precaution. And in truth I didn’t, I called your grandfather for a name he suggested old Bone Breaker and was willing to pay for him so I accepted. There’s none better.”
“Did he really managed to get granddad off the hook for murder?”
Kalor nodded. “Three times. And each one Dad should have rotted in prison. The way he tells it it was smooth sailing for all three. But the way I recall it they were all touch and go for a time. The first Dad had been caught red handed with the gun.”
^ frowned. “Some hit man?”
“That was part of the contract, however the guys who hired him were suppose to have a story ready for when he got caught, something which would get him out of hot water. Instead they swore they never seen him before. The day it went to trail Bone Breaker had their swore statements that they had in fact hired a killer to take a rival out. He also had on record that my father had been hired by the rival to protect him however as he was tryign to fight the attackers off they managed to shot his man and that’s when the cops were summoned. If they’d arrived just a bit sooner they might have caught the real killers. Jury brought it.”
“Fuck no way!” % stared opened mouthed. “You’re shitting us.”
Kalor shook his head. “Nope, not in the least. I sat right in the front row watching the guys on the stand, they were sweating. When Dad took the stand he told the same story, even had a description of the guys, sort of matched the ones who hired him. I suspect the jury knew he was the shooter but he was just the hired gun. While he should swing well as he was just the trigger man maybe the guys who really should be in prison are the ones who were willing to pay another to kill.
“The next time wasn’t a nail biter. The cops had fucked up, they hadn’t collected the evidence right, and the chain of custody was broken, they coerce witness statements, a whole range of things and when it went to trial the house of cards they’d made came down. Don’t get me wrong Dad did the hit but they didn’t have the proof.” Bone Breaker didn’t have to do much just ask a few witnesses what was said when they refused to tell the cops what they wanted to hear. Then he’d pressed the lab techs making it clear that he at least knew how evidence should be handled. It didn’t take much for them all to give in and admit that more often than not the chain of custody hadn't been followed.
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Sorting my dogs into Hogwarts Houses:
(I do not support JK Rowling in any way. Cool? Cool.)
First up: Maggie.
Puggle (Pug + Beagle mix), 11 years old. Resident idiot. Nickname: Sweet Pea
House: Gryffindor. All day, every day.
Evidence:
Very loud. Barks at everything
Tries to fight thunder
Will scratch you if you stop petting her too soon
Does that “I’m not tired I’m just thinking w my eyes closer” thing (except there is not a thought behind those eyes)
When there was a Cottonmouth (venomous snake) in our backyard, she tried to eat it for approximately three seconds before she got scared and ran to get us
Starts fights w our older dog, loses every time
She’s a Gryffindor trust me y’all
Next is: Bella.
Also a Puggle (see above), 13 years old. Resident napper. Nickname: Bella Bella
House: Slytherin. Don’t be fooled by all the pictures of her sleeping.
Evidence:
The mastermind behind literally every escape attempt our dogs have ever staged
Used our male dog’s infatuation w her to her advantage
Sits by me as soon as I sit on the couch, and everyone knows the Slytherins stick together outside their common room
Will beg for food, but subtler than the other two
Wins the fights every time
During aforementioned snake incident, she hung back while the other two “fought” the snake (still got bit tho)
Idk I just get the vibes
Lastly: Shelton
Rat Terrier Mix (we think), would’ve been seven this year (5 when he crossed the rainbow bridge). Resident simp. Nickname: Shelly-ton
House: Hufflepuff
Evidence:
Bella’s best friend, boyfriend, loyal follower (the last two aren’t necessarily Hufflepuff related, I just thought it was relevant lmao)
Cute but psycho
Would sometimes lay down to eat his food
Stayed out of the fights
While Bella masterminded the escape plans, he was the one who followed along w it and did the work of digging under our fence
Again during the snake fiasco, he protected his girl, and killed the snake, getting bit on the snout in the process (he looked miserable w his snout all swollen :( )
Younger brother syndrome (again, not necessarily Hufflepuff but still relevant)
Used his cuteness to his advantage (mostly against my dad lmao) and it worked more often than not
(When he had surgery to remove an abscess from his paw he had a cone to keep him from chewing on the bandage. My dad took it off like 4 hours after getting home because “he just looked so sad”)
My boy 💛
Bonus: my granddad’s dog Chloe
Havanese, I think she’s like 13 or something. Resident napper/scaredy dog. Nickname: Chlo Chlo
House: Ravenclaw
Evidence:
Sits w my grandad while he does his daily Sudoku
Has anxiety
Barks at animals on the tv
(My favorite video of her is her barking at the tv while the GEICO camel commercial was playing)
That’s really it I just wanted to add some Ravenclaw representation
Love y’all smarty pantses 💙
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sarawritesx · 11 months ago
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"Mmhm, I'll have to remember that for once you get that cheerleading uniform back."he murmured with a short laugh. "Baby, you were made for snuggles and cuddles, it'd be a crime against humanity to not give them to you."he stated with a grin and opened the box with bunch of glasses and such for upper cabinets. "Just point where you want these and i'll set them up."Mike said.
"Hypothetical as in, we met in high school. You, a cute cheerleader, and me, a heartthrob quarterback. I'm sure there are bunch of movies made with that plot, right?"he asked with a chuckle. "Of course it wasn't cool. Emotions? What are those?"he ased with a laugh. "But I also think a lot of it came from growing up with a father that served in the army, us traveling a lot... emotions were a lot to handle, and he was quite strict. Things changed for the better once we grew up, though."he stated, Alma did see him around his parents, and his dad softened up a lot throughout the years, especially since he became a granddad. @spellbindingnights
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"Roleplaying is fun" she winked at him. "Mmm... a cute cheerleader distracting a noble police officer... sounds like a plan, handsome" she smirked. "And I don't mind some roughness as long as you give me all the aftercare and snuggles afterwards" she explained as she put the cutlery away. Alma then moved to another box. She knew how much he liked snuggles, and he was amazing at it. Being in his arms was her favorite part of any day.
"Our hypothetical situation?" She asked rather confused. "Ah, yes, teenage boys and their emotions" Alma laughed softly. "So not cool being absolutely and madly in love" she teased playfully as she continued to accommodate the lower cabinets. @utterxdesires
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octoagentmiles · 2 years ago
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What are your thoughts surrounding the Golden Mole episode if you’ve watched it? Personally, I really enjoy it, but I was kind of taken aback by the way Kwazii was acting at the start? His writing at points in A&B in general makes me feel a way, the difference has been a big adjustment. You always tie things together with your character analyzations very well, so I’m curious to know your take on this one! It might even make me feel less thrown off by it :)
you sent this a long time ago I'm so sorry- If your opinions on Kwazii's writing have changed, I'd love hearing any takes you have now- but in the meantime take post 🤲 (note that I talk a lot about Tracker since he is kinda the focus of the episode- ok now let's begin:)
(take an ear-twitchy Kwazii for your patience hfjskd 🤲✨)
I've noticed Kwazii's been written differently too, and I've got theories about it ofc (see closing thoughts), but in regards to the Golden Mole episode I actually think his behavior was pretty in character. I think Kwazii has a fear of rejection (because of how often he is rejected due to being a pirate), and he seems to be very aware of how people view him, and will either over-compensate by toning down his energy (or at least trying to, like in the Puffins.) or try to make himself seem cooler and more capable than he is if he notices someone likes him, like he did with Pinto that one time.
He also did this in The Combtooth Blenny; where he spent the entire time trying to make Peso think he had everything in control, even though he didn't. That's pretty similar to what's happening in The Golden Mole.
The Combtooth Blenny and The Golden Mole are pretty similar episodes overall: Kwazii and Peso stuck on a desert island with no communication vs. Kwazii and Tracker stuck in a desert with no communication, Kwazii desperate to seem like a capable leader type, Peso (implied to be) as a new Octonaut vs. Tracker as a new Octo-Agent, etc.. (cough cough wanna point out UK Peso and Tracker's shared voice actor just because cough cough-)
Analysis time now:
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Right away we can tell Tracker thinks Kwazii is cool, just from the way he looks at him (either in awe or nervousness), and is eager to please him. We see this trait of his when we first meet him in Operation Deep Freeze when he excitedly calls them "The Octonaut guys!!! :D" and then shouts "Cool!!" when Barnacles promises to keep him posted. Tracker is a follower by nature, not a leader. He'd much prefer to let ANYONE else tell him what to do, rather than follow his own instincts or take charge. So Kwazii? Octonaut guy?? Perfect person to listen to—definitely not gonna question his judgement at all. Wouldn't dream of it.
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...Even when it backfires on them both.
Tracker is very strong, smart, and capable on his own, and he seems to know that—but he's still very insecure in his own intuition; and tends to put others before himself, kind of like how Barnacles does. He says at one point in S2 (paraphrasing here-) that in the Polar Scouts; "they are taught to help anyone who needs it, no matter what." and I think he and Barnacles both indirectly learned their self-worth issues from this (like: “When you see a creature in trouble, it is YOUR duty to help them. Your own safety comes second.” ). He's a great Polar Scout, and he's desperate to be seen as a good Octo-Agent by the Octonauts.
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(Octonauts™ at it again with the parallels <3) Tracker has literally never left the Arctic before; another reason why he wants to trust Kwazii so badly. He’s out of his element, but Kwazii’s been around the world, he should know about deserts, right? One way I wish Kwazii had been written differently in this episode, would be him being a bit more worried about Tracker. He knows they're in this situation because he messed up—and Barnacles likely trusted Kwazii to take care of him. So if he had maybe panicked with Tracker when they lost their backpack, instead of just standing there, or if he asked him how he was doing once or twice, that would’ve been better. (In the CombBlenny, he gets visibly frustrated a few times, before putting on a brave face for Peso. In this episode he kinda just dissociates when Tracker freaks out, and it’s a little awkward.)
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I do really like this scene at the end where Kwazii reassures Tracker, and gives him his book back. It feels like Kwazii is trying to apologize to him in his own way.
Also I think Tracker would've passed the test no matter what. He was the only agent who got any sort of test. He probably asked Barnacles for one, and it got made up on the spot. He would've passed even if he completely failed, because it was just a confidence booster exercise; like how 99% of Peso's S1 training was just confidence boosting disguised as serious training. Barnacles couldn’t actually train Peso on how to be an Octonaut or a medic, because he was already both of those from the start; he just needed to be taught how to trust himself.
Closing off with more Kwazii thoughts: I think he's being written differently on purpose. There has been a timeskip, and everyone seems a bit more mature now (it's most obvious in Peso and the Vegimals, and Dashi in some aspects). It could just be that he toned down a bit as he got older; but I've noticed that he's written the most weird whenever he's partnered with Calico Jack. He acts more immature and just... off? and in my head it's because he really hasn't seen CJ since he was a kitten, so he isn't sure how to act around him (plus he REALLY wants to impress his granddad). We also know that CJ's been teaching Kwazii stuff, so that could be another factor in his personality/vibe shift. The times I've found where Kwazii acts the most like himself- are the times he's alone with the other Octonauts, and I think that's interesting.
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