#he also used to try and start shit with me about female shepard. I hope he touched grass

[waspgrave]

I feel bad and shoutout to all the default male hawke lovers out there, but I still feel a bite gnash grrrr response towards him bc his fans used to be the absolute WORST to anyone who didn’t play him or go ‘yes that’s THE canon hawke’

[unseelie-bitch]

Season 1 Episode 1: To the Waters and the Wild [Part One]

[I recognise I've written season 1 but please god don't let there be a season 2]

Dem SHEEPS

Cannot believe for the opening two lines they really thought repeating "fecking sheep" was the way to go

Oop magical barrier time okay

And there's a murdered sheep. Such winx vibes

And the man's getting murdered. Well. That happened.

That better not be a fucking werewolf because that's the vibes I got

Also maybe don't go through the magic barrier. Just a thought

The most winx thing about it so far is the lil title bit. I acc liked that

Sorry does Bloom just know about magic?????? WHY IS SHE JUST ROCKING UP WTF

Oh look. It's Terra. Give me Flora

Aisha just mysteriously walking. Fair enough

Stella is immediately popular and has a very deliberate shot to give us "popular bitch" vibes. A joke

There's Not Musa

There's a man and Bloom is IMMEDIATELY staring at him

Also Bloom looks way too old I'm sorry she just does I hate it

I don't know who any of these men are but they are clearly important

I think this man is Sky and I'm so thrown off by his accent. He's english but like... if you want the prince to be english he shouldn't be like... ordinary english. Where's the RP

Also Bloom is supposed to be an extrovert why is she so not into the conversation

Okay time skip because Bloom found out 3 months ago. I'll accept it but I'm not happy about it

And Stella's watching them from afar

That is NOT what mansplaining is clearly this writer is trying to be """"feminist"""" and ENTIRELY missed the fucking point

Bloom was looking for Stella alright

So um how the fuck would Stella know about American stereotypes

Also you IMMEDIATELY made her a bitch excuse you my girl is a ray of sunshine. LITERALLY

Sorry did they say "Miss Darling"? "Dalling"?? Why not Faragonda or Griselda????

THEY REPLACED FARAGONDA???????

At least Stella still has her ring

I'm going to pretend she was offering Bloom help instead of the obvious "if you can't make it" challenge

Okay Stella's kind of a babe but she ISN'T STELLA

Why the FUCK is Alfea in Solaria

#NotMyFaragonda

YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE DISSAPPOINTED IN THE LACK OF WINGS BLOOM

Oh they had wings in the past and lost them? Bullshit I hate it

TINKERBELL IS FUCKING REAL WHAT THE FUCK

Also they just all know about Bloom's magic. Really feel we need some backstory lads

I'm really hung up on "Tink was an air fairy" like WHAT

What's the tea lads who did Bloom burn

She's facetiming her parents, fair enough

Please fuck off with the narrative that girls can't live together without fighting like wtf. "Five girls in an enclosed space" are not going to "decend into a lord of the flies situation" NO REAL WOMAN WOULD SAY THAT. ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN EVERYONE ELSE IS RIGHT THERE

Bloom is not fucking anti-social what the FUCK

So her parents solidly don't know where she is. Right

Okay Aisha is a BABE she saw Bloom floudering and was like COMING IN TO DEFEND YOUR LIE

Oh so Bloom is no longer adopted. She has dormant fairy blood. Right. Why.

Bloom is NOT a Ravenclaw OR Slytherin she should be the most Griffindor Griffindor to ever Griffindor what the FUCK

Now watch them not write her as a Ravenclaw OR Slytherin

Why must you write Stella as a bitch. She could have simply been Baby

You've just turned Flora into Aunt Hilda from Sabrina. But like, written as the joke. What the fuck

...but also Terra you shouldn't take over a shared space

Why the fuck are they writing Terra as the outcast

MUSA I LIKED YOU UNTIL YOU WERE MEAN WHY

Also can they please make Terra less annoying

Hope Musa's okay

That better not be Riven he looks like such a dweeb

OH A RIVEN'S A MASSIVE DICK SUPRISE SUPRISE

The real question is why would a "nice" person like Sky have a misogynistc friend like Riven

Loving the shot of the singular woman they said is a specialist

OH THERE'S A SECOND WOMAN. THE FEMINISTS ARE TAKING OVER (🎶I'm an adult virgin🎶)

Sorry is Sky's dad dead??? Surely Sky is now... king??

Sky is good bean. I like it

Sorry can people get CONSCRIPTED to be specialists??? That sounded like they were getting conscripted

Ah the not werewolf was a Burned One

Some moronic specialist just went through the barrier and he's gonna get attacked isn't he

Oh they're magic zombies. Of course

He gonna die

Oh they found the sheep guy's corpse. Yikes

Ah so imma say Bloom is supposed to be 16 and that was how long ago the last sighting was

Is Rosalind going to be fake Daphne

Does that mean sheep man was the Alfea Shepard?? Why does Alfea have sheep???

"Before gossip starts" bro a student found the body. Gossip has started

"That old age decapitation really sneaks up on you" Musa BABE

"Happened to my nan right in the middle of bingo" AISHA BAAAAABE

Also Musa clearly has a thing for Aisha. Take this somewhere.

Why are they making Terra the joke AGAIN. Stop it. Stop it. Stop. It.

Why are Terra's only personality traits "nice" and "awkward"

Has the writer ever met a human women. Serious question. Because this is NOT how women act

"Happens a lot around me" this is the FIRST DAY oh my god it happened ONCE. I'm trying so hard to find any of the redeemable qualities that any half decent writer could have written in for Terra but they just. Aren't. There.

Musa is doing her best and I don't blame her

Is her dad the replacement for Palladium because that's a joke

Oh look it's the one girl who actually looks like a child because her actor actually was!! And I know they sexualised her and I am NOT looking forward to it

Beatrix is doing her best and is also clearly putting it on. I like her

Also NotFaragonda is a fucking joke

Also wtf was the office I thought this was supposed to be high fantasy. You took out the sci-fi for THAT backstreet office??

Why do Bloom's notes look like a 12 year old's diary wtf

Oop flashback

Who did Bloom set on fire?? This is probs in between The Incident and Alfea so... did she burn someone alive

Why can this man not write ANY female interactions??? Even mother/daugher interactions are bullshit because Vanessa was a GOOD MOTHER and this woman is NOT

Whom the fuck talks like that?? 0/10 unrealistic dialogue

Oop Bloom's eyes are g l o w i n g

Aww Sky is doing His Best

That really isn't what mansplaining is. Is the writer actually trying to mansplain mansplaining??

Stella and Sky clearly have history and Sky made a backhanded comment while Stella was being a bitch

Prediction time: last year Stella and Sky dated, Stella had a magic emotion blowup resulting in her having to repeat first year, hence why everyone's so preoccupied with what she says, does and looks like

Aisha is seeing Bloom leave like "oh shit"

I like the weird lightsnake

I love Bloom's outfit but Bloom should not be wearing it

Oh she's going to practise her magic in the middle of the forest. Excellent

It's going about as well as you'd expect

Why does she have so many pictures of her on her own, clearly taken by another person on her own phone, if she has no friends??? Sus writing

Oh did she burn their house down?

You should not be trying this with long sleeved, flamable clothes on and no control. In the middle of a likely very flamable forest. Just saying

Maybe instead of making them bigger, focus on putting a small flame out?

Oh and she can't. Shocker.

YES AISHA

And I'm writing way too much so imma split this into two parts

[queenvidal]

Reuinons

- 6 months are a long time, they have a lot of catching up to do -

- Work on AO3 -

Chapter 1:

Shepard escapes the elevator to go for the cockpit, Joker pinged her, said she needs to see it herself. What  it is, he did not elaborate but she went nevertheless. Quickly she hurries to her spot to the left side of the pilot seat. “What’s wrong?”

Joker activates his console. A small map of the cluster opens up with three glowing dots on the left corner. This must be the Dalatrass, Victus men and the krogan Clan-Chief. “See that?" Joker asks, his voice barely over a whisper, he is nervous. "They are all just far enough from each other to be not in weapon range. I’m mean no pressure Shep but that is next level tense.”

“Yeah, Wrex told me they could not agree on a neutral meeting ground until now.” She could hear the tiredness in Wrex voice on their last vid-call. When she told him about Victus suggestion of holding the negotiation meeting here on the Normandy, he visibly relaxed. Certainly he would never admit it but Shepard assumed or hoped, it's been mostly because they would be able to finally see each other in person again.

Joker clears his throat, not knowing how to express his concern. “Shep, don’t get me wrong but with you and Wrex… you know, aren’t we considered biased technically?”

Shepard sighs. Not only technically. “Yup, but in the end all three of them agreed. So either they don’t know or don’t care. In worst case though, they will use it against Wrex. We’ll see.” She and Wrex kept their affair private but they didn't hide, still from Shepards point of view, it doesn't seem too likely for Victus and the Dalatrass to know about them. And even if they did, with their consent to the meeting ground and Shepards presence, they agreed on letting private matters slip.

Joker turns his head back to his console again. With a few hand movements over the screens he sends all three fleets a notification of their arrival and their location for the meeting. “I don't like this.” He mumbles. “I really don’t, Lex.”

She pats him on his shoulder lightly, careful not to injure him. “Me neither, Joker. Let’s hope we don’t cause another war.”

All three lights on the map start to move, Shepards sign to get moving as well. She turns on her heels to go back to the elevator. As comfortable as her leggings and the training jacket are, she can’t hold a diplomatic meeting dressed this way.

When she arrives in her cabin, she hangs her jacket over her desk chair. Her long black locks are getting fumbled into a bun before she takes the captain attire out of her small closet. After all this time it still feels wrong to wear what should have been Andersons uniform.

Shep takes a look in the mirror for a second, trying to calm her nerves. As much as she dispides the idea of her being the one who has to beg the other species for help, all of this bullshit has its perks, she'll finally see Wrex again.

But even though Alexis is looking forward to it, she wished it would be under different circumstances. This is going to suck, no matter the outcome. And she has to stay neutral and diplomatic, both are attributes she was always lacking of. She is a soldier, not a politician, she should be fighting alongside with Anderson on earth and not trying to form a alliance between three species, that are hostile towards each other for centuries.

Traynors voice sounds over the speakers, breaking the Shepards train of thought. “Commander, the salarian Dalatrass and the krogan Clan-Chief are ready to come aboard.”

“Have them brought to the conference room, I’ll join in a second.” Shepard buttoms up her formal jacket and checks her reflection one final time before turning to leave her cabin.

Usually she’d be mad that their elevator is taking so long but right now she is thankful for every second she can stay in its small space. But eventually it opens its doors with a woosh, releasing her.

Traynor nods at her Commander with a compassionate smile on her face. Shepard smiles back but it doesn’t reach her eyes. It's uncharacteristically quiet on the deck, everyone is on high alert. The tension is sickening. The two Privates in the scan area salute Shepard as she slowly passes them. They are also absolute quiet.

When nearing the final door to the conference room, Wrex and the Dalatrass can already be heard arguing. Loudly. Alexis takes a deep breath before she opens the door to join them.

The Dalatrass is pacing around. “The krogan is in no position to make demands!”

Wrex just folds his arms unimpressed. “The krogan has a name, Urdnot Wrex. And I am not just some junkyard varren you unleash whenever you’re in trouble."

Perfect. They've just stared and are already on each others throats. Shepard takes her spot at the table, returning to her commander face but the moment her grey eyes lock with Wrex red ones, Shepard can't help but let a tiny smile slip through. The krogan acknowledges her arrival with a nod. Not what Shepard expected after they have been apart for almost six months but considering the circumstances and the audience it is more than she can ask for.

Wrex eyes stay on her a few seconds longer before he continues. “I’ve got my own problems. Reaper scouts have arrived on Tuchanka. So why should I care if a few turians go extinct?”

Primarch Victus mirrors Wrex posture, not impressed either. “Trying to draw out negotiations will get you nowhere, Wrex. I have no time for it! Just tell us what you want for your help.”

The Clan-Chief leans on the table and turns his red eyes to the Dalatrass. “I’ll tell you what I need. A cure for the genophage!”

The eyes of the salarian go wide in shock, everyone at the table is surprised by Wrex demand. Alexis decides to keep her mouth shut, but not so the Dalatrass. “Oh, Absolutely not! The genophage is non negotiable!”

"Wanna bet? Sur'Kesh is still untouched but I wonder how long that will be the case." Wrex voice is dropping even lower. It almost sounds like a threat, making Shepard finally join in.

"Dalatrass, the genophage should be discussed. You can't expect Wrex to sacrifice the krogan race like that! I understand you are opposed with the idea but we are past problems like the krogan rebellion. We have worse to fear.”

But the other woman waves her off. “You are not in the position to say that, Shepard. My people know them best.”

Wrex sneers at her. “According to you no one is in the position to do shit. You used us to fight a war you couldn't win. It wasn’t any of your species or the asari that stopped the rachni. It was krogan blood that turned the tide!”

“Yes.” The Dalatrass admits. “And after that you ceased to be useful! The genophage was the only way to keep your ‘urges’ in check.”

If Wrex eyes could light fire, the salarian would be a pile of ash. Shepard can see how hard he is holding himself back. Back in the day, he would have jumped over the table and snap the womans neck.

Victus interferes, “Dalatrass, you may not like him but Wrex is right. Insulting him won’t change that."

But she just waves him off as well. “I won't apologize for speaking the truth. We uplifted the krogan to do one thing: wage war. It is all they know because it is all we wanted them to know.”

Shepard has to sigh in annoyance again, this is leading nowhere. “Yeah, I think we all went to school and learned about the rachni war, your people's morals behind their actions is a matter to debate but not here-

“I won’t let history repeat!” The Dalatrass interrupts. “Cure the genophage and you doom us all.”

Shepard has enough of this overly dramatic woman. “Whether you like it or not, we all need krogan help to win this war! And obviously and quite understandably they won't fight to extinction, not for you, not for me. They and with that we need a cure!"

“And then what once it is over? We'll simply trade one enemy for another. There won’t be peace because krogans don’t know how-”

Victus slams his fist on the table in frustration “Enough! This is all theoretical. It would take years to formulate a cure. Time we simply don’t have.”

Wrex huffs a sarcastic laugh. “My information says otherwise.” He moves from his spot to the small console on the desk in front of Shepard. While typing in some codes he continues. “A salarian scientist, Maelon. He was on my planet testing a cure on our females.”

He turns his face to Shepard. “You met him.”

She nods. “Yeah and I remember his methods to be baberic.”

“But what you didn’t know is that other females survived his experiments.” He opens up a file and the screen behind them starts to play a video. It shows secret recordings in a salarian laboratory, krogan females locked away in small glass cabins.

“So…” Wrex continues. “The Dalatrass sent in a team to clean up the whole mess and to take them prisoners.”

Oh no. That’s not good. Shepard and Wrex turn to the Dalatrass who seems to be lost for words. “Where did you get this? This could be just a fabrication!”

Wrex storms to her, glaring at her with fury in his eyes. “Don’t dare to insult me! Those are my people and they are immune to the genophage. And you. Give. Them. Back!”

Shepard steps in between them before it escalates, she gently pushes Wrex back who looks at her for a moment before he retreats.

The Primarch leaves his spot as well. “Dalatrass, is this really true?”

But she isn’t answering, instead she ignores both men and turns to Shepard. “How will a cure benefit my people?”

Okay, fuck diplomats and fuck being biased.

“What the hell, are you really that blind? Pallavan is burning right now, Earth is burning right now! And so will Sur'kesh, Thessia and every other damn planet in this galaxy if we won’t cement this alliance. The genophage is going on for almost fifteen-thousand years, the krogan paid for the rebellion, a lot has changed since then! They deserve to be cured.”

The Primarch agrees. “She is right. The hard truth is we don’t have a choice.” He steps closer to the salarian. “Give Wrex what he wants.”

But the Dalatrass just keeps looking at Shepard. "I'm the blind one? Actually I'm afraid your 'sympathy' towards krogans is clouding your judgment."

And here they go. Shepard figured it would be only a matter of time for one of them to bring up their relationship. She wants to answer but Wrex is faster than her.

"Shut the fuck up! Dragging private affairs into this discussion to save your own skin, we all agreed for the Normandy to be the neutral ground, so treat it that way!"

Shepard tries again, in a now calmer voice. “Dalatrass, see that way. Either a cure or a harvested galaxy. Your call."

The salarian woman sighs, finally realising she has been defeated. “The females are being kept at one of our STG bases on Sur'kesh.” She turns to face Shepard again. “But I warn you, Commander. The consequences of this will be felt for centuries to come!”

“Fine by me.” Shepard simply says as she rounds the table to get to the exit “They’ll be nothing compared to what happens if the Reapers win.”

Wrex smiles at his human. “Let's get the my women.”

But the Dalatrass interferes again “You are not setting foot on Sur'kesh! This will take time to-”

“Now!” Victus growls. “It happens now. As a Council Spectre, Shepard can oversee the exchange.”

After a moment of silence all three turn and leave the Dalatrass alone but she speaks up again one final time to threaten Shepard. “I won’t forget this, Commander. A bully has few friends when he needs them most!”

Now it's Alexis time to wave the Dalatrass off with her hand before the door closes behind her. It won't be Shepard, who’ll have to face the Reapers on her own, it’s the salarians if they won’t cooperate.

When the they enter the CIC, both Victus and Wrex turn around to talk to her at the same time. Wrex glares at Victus while trying to dwarf him by looming over the turian. It's obviously a threatening attempt and Victus is getting the hint. He tells Shepard, that he has important business with her to discuss and asks her to see him once she and the Clan-Chief are 'done'.

Both her and Wrex are looking after him, waiting for him to get out of earshot. When the krogan is certain no one dares to listen to them, he returns his focus back to the Commander. “I have to talk with you. One to one, business related, but that can wait.”

Shepard raises an eyebrow in question. “Uhm, okay. Then why did you scare off the Primarch?”

He comes a step closer, entering her personal space. “Private matters.”

Alexis can't help but snort a laugh. “Very smooth, Wrex.” She hopes no one can see the blush of her face when she's making her way to the galaxy map to order Traynor to set course to Sur'Kesh once the Dalatrass passed the exact position of the lab with the krogan women.

Wrex is already standing in the elevator waiting for his human. His eyes are not leaving hers. The blush intensifies and her heart is picking up speed. Wrex ruby eyes always did things to her but right now it's all her mind can think about.

Finally dropping her Commander face, she joins him, smiling from ear to ear. The Clan-Chief slams his fist on the button for Shepards cabin, not paying any attention to the startled humans on deck. Once the doors are closed, they can have the reunion both were looking forward to.

[incorrectly-quoted-queers]

Drunk Punch Love: Chapter 4

Pairing: FemShep and Garrus Vakarian (Shakarian)

Rating: PG-13 (with some tossed F-bombs)

Summary: Their awkward, badass journey through saving the galaxy and accidentally falling in love

Chapter 4: Drunken Heroes

After all her damned talk of avoiding booze forever, here she was, taking her whole crew to get wasted at a bar.

To give herself credit, this was 100% about letting her friends blow off steam before they headed to Virmire, not about her. She didn't even have any plans to drink, just play babysitter and have some fun with them. After all they'd done for the mission, they deserved some shore leave.

Anya almost wished she could be as hyped as Ash was. The soldier kept talking about how she was itching for a good Citadel blue cocktail mixed with classic Russian Vodka. Kept on saying she'd call it "The Shepard".

She stuck back, watching Ash drag Tali, Ash, Joker, Liara, Kaidan, and Garrus to the bartender. The only one left was her favorite cranky Krogan, an old man among youths. But he already knew that without her pointing that out. He chuckled low next to her, "You look like a mother Varren with her pups."

"What, do I look like I'm gonna eat them?"

Wrex grumbled with distaste, but Anya felt pretty satisfied, annoying him. "Varren are dedicated to their young. And so are you, Mother Shepard."

Anya nearly gagged at the thought. Her, a mom? Hardly. She was just a pathetic lonely soldier who had friends for the first time in a long time. A hard mission does that to people; it bonds them. "I'd prefer you never call me that again."

"No promises."

"What do you even do at a bar?"

While Wrex barely reacted, she knew his was peering at her with confusion. "I drink, just like everyone else."

"I can't picture it."

"Well if you need a picture, I'll be over there, drinking ryncol. I'll tell the waitress you're buying." Wrex patted her back and walked off without any confirmation.

Under her breath, Anya grumbled, "I mean, I am buying, but you could've asked..." She just shook her head and accepted the inordinate amount of credits she was about to lose on that tab. But at least, when she turned to look back at the bar, her entire crew seemed to be enjoying themselves. Ash was being the leader of the pack. Liara was sticking closing, admiring the entertainment, and Tali looked like she was roped into being her wingman.

Garrus, of course, was the one in some sort of arm wrestle with Kaidan while Joker egged them on. Who knew what the hell that was about.

Shepard just nabbed a glass of water and joined Liara in watching Ash try to flirt with guys and/or flirt with them for Tali, who seemed far less interested. She noticed T'Soni stiffened up a little the second she sat down, but she tried to ignore it. "Everyone looks like they're having a good time, huh?"

"Absolutely. I've never seen Gunnery Chief Willaims so loud. Not outside of a firefight, at least."

Though she didn't mean to, every time she sat down next to her crew, she turned full Commander mode. And Liara's somber mood was a prime target. "I know you said you were doing better, but how are you really holding up?"

Staring down at her glass, Liara kept on looking at the liquid in it like it would say something profound to her. Anya remembered that look; probably a little too well. "Worse than I expected. Benezia and I weren't close for a long time. I knew losing her would be hard but not like... this. I feel like a fundamental part of me is now being washed away a little more every day and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

Anya normally wasn't one for opening up deep, old wounds, but she couldn't just let Liara sit there, haunted and alone, on their last night of peace before the storm. She was very deliberate in putting her palm gently on Liara's shoulder and not her hand. "After Akuze, I used to have a drinking problem. Or lack of drinking problem. I'd used to come here, buy the drink my squad used to always get, and stared down into it until the bar was empty and I was kicked out. It was like I was trying to find meaning to fill that empty space in me. But nothing really fills it. You just find other things that give you meaning and eventually they motivate you more than the emptiness does."

Before Shepard could react, Liara put her own hand on hers and was giving her this sweet smile. "Thank you, Shepard."

Anya pulled her hand away and scooted an inch or two back, trying to diffuse any cute moment Liara might've thought they were having. "I'm here to help anytime. That's what friends do."

After she said that, Anya didn't want to look up and cringe at the disappointment painted on Liara's face. It already fucked her up inside. But when she did finally look up, she felt a lot more weird feelings than she meant to.

Sure, there was Liara's conflicted face, but past her ear Anya could see the boy band of Joker, Garrus, and Kaidan sitting around a table and laughing. Well, they were, but then a female turian walked up and looked at Garrus like he was a snack.

Not that she fully disagreed but that wasn't the damn point.

While she didn't mean to go comatose, and she was pretty sure Liara might've said something, she felt like everything blacked out except him. And he was doing that awkward smiling thing, and she could tell he was flustered, and she could tell the turian was hitting on him. And where the bro in her was happy for him, that fucked up part of her that woke itself up on a Noveria bar had its eyes wide open and was screaming.

Before she could make any expressions that made her make a fool of herself, and so she didn't have to look at it anymore, Anya went to staring down into the glass of water in front of her.

"By the goddess, how did I not notice?"

Shepard shook her head and gave Liara her best clueless look. Oh boy, how she didn't want her to be noticing what she thought she might have noticed. ANya asked, "Notice what?"

Even though there was this sadness in her eyes, there was also clarity. Liara said it so plainly that it hurt, "You have feelings for Garrus."

Anya covered Liara's mouth with her hand and closed her eyes, like if she wished it hard enough she'd wake up and this nightmare would be over and no one would know her dumb, dirty little secret. "No, nope, I don't. You saw nothing."

"And your cheeks are even getting red. I never-"

Giving up, because clearly her cover-up skills were piss poor, Shepard just held her hands and tried not to look too desperate. It was embarrassing enough. "Please don't talk about it. He doesn't feel the same way and it doesn't matter. You're all my friends and we're on a mission and that's what we need to focus on."

Liara frowned, but didn't seem too keen to pry. "I won't make you talk more, mostly because I feel embarrassed for chasing after you now, but if you need to talk, I'm here."

If Anya was in peak Commander mode, she'd stay shut up, let it end at that, but after so much time keeping it to herself and feeling so frustrated, and now seeing him get looked at like that by some attractive turian... Well, maybe she'd be better off not keeping it inside. "He's my best friend, Liara. It complicates everything."

"Clearly people think that complication is worth it. And here I was, hoping it was me."

"I'm sorry, Liara."

"It matters more to me that you stay my friend."

Of all the stupid things tonight, that made her smile. Even under all the "getting caught looking at Garrus" embarrassment. "That's what matters to me, too. And not just with you, with him."

"I can understand that."

Anya winced and kept her eyes down, not wanting to look at Garrus, knowing he probably was flirting back. He had every right and... And, well, it wasn't like he owed her anything. They said it didn't happen, she was just a squishy human, and they'd just stay friends, right? "So, I'd just prefer we talk about other things to distact me from saying anything dumb about Garrus Vakarian-"

"Somebody saying my name?"

Startled, Anya jumped in her chair and almost fell off. Liara started giggling like the funniest shit just happened, but hearing him pop up behind he was so unfair. More unfair was the fact she noticed his hand was holding her chair straight. Anya just sunk down into it, real low, and tried to hope that Saren would take her down with him. At least it was an honorable death.

Lucky for Shepard, Liara winked at her and saved her ass. "We were wondering who won the arm wrestling, you or Lieutenant Alenko. The Commander was betting on you, even though I said Kaidan would win."

"You wound me, Liara."

Trying to act casual, Anya raised an eyebrow. "So who won, then?"

Garrus scratched the back of his neck and admitted, "Okay, fine, Alenko won. But only because he's a dirty cheat and used biotics."

She didn't know what it was about his wounded pride, but it helped unwind all the knots she'd put herself in. Anya patted his shoulder, saying, "Don't worry, you're still my number one turian."

"He's not a turian and I'm your only turian. That statement means nothing, but sure, thanks, Shep."

Watching him scowl at her, like nothing was weird or wrong, it made her laugh in a way that vibrated throughout her entire body. But maybe she also didn't want to admit how much it warmed her up, knowing he turned the flirting turian down and came over here to her.

After she got out her nerves and laughed like that, the rest of the night was a fun blur. The crew started sharing embarrassing stories of first kisses and first posts, and they all danced and Tali made fun of her for being terrible. Garrus was the only one who gave her a wink during that, because he knew her actual skills. Not like she was going to tondue at a club, though. And then later they even got Wrex to join in on an argument on who had the wildest battle scars. No surprise, the Krogan won. But Joker's surgery scars almost gave him a run for his money.

That night, she was the one helping carry Ash back to the Normandy while everyone else was walking or stumbling in front of them. Everyone enjoyed themselves, but Ash was definitely the one that hit the booze the hardest.

But Anya didn't mind too much. She saw how Ash made everyone smile and brought them together. The spitfire would be a great leader someday, once she got more experience under her belt.

Leaning into her shoulder, the Gunnery Chief started to mumble. "We're going to save the galaxy, Shep. I'll get to be a hero. The Williams name is gonna go down in history for great reasons this time."

Anya held onto Ash's side, tight, and said, "You're going to be a great hero, Ash. Probably a better one than me. You don't have the baggage weighing you down."

When Ash laughed, it bubbled through her body and almost shoved them too close to the railing. Garrus gave her a look, like asking if she wanted help, but Anya shook her head. She and captain realism didn't need to burst Ash's hopefulness here. It was honestly kind of nice to hear someone talk about the future like this. Ash wasn't thinking about dying; just about the good she'd do.

How could Anya not admire that?

"I'm gonna have a tough time beating you, Shep, but I'll do my best."

"You better. Second human Spectre, Ashely Williams, Sounds good, right?"

Ash was still so wobbly. Anya wasn't quite sure she'd remember any of this in the morning. That only made it so much easier to compliment her. "Don't get crazy, Commander." She rolled her eyes in a very exaggerated way, but then hiccuped so hard some of her hair fell out of her bun. "But yeah, it kinda does sound good."

"Well, let's get back on the Normandy and make you a hero, Ash." When she finished carrying Ash onto the ship, she kept on seeing the drunk cadet she used to be, laughing with her friends anytime they got shore leave, all swapping stories on how they'd become heroes. None of them would've ever guessed Anya'd get it because they all died. She'd gained honor in an awful, horrible way. But she hoped Ash could become someone great by her side, instead.

That was one of the few things she'd enjoy seeing, at the end of all this.

///

Author's Note:

Thanks so much for reading, and double thanks to my lovely patrons:

Danyell Jones

Amy Connolly

If you'd like to support my work, please go check out my patreon: patreon.com/gracejordan

I also write original stories and am trying to build a community of fandom lovers on writing sites, in Discord, and (in the future) on Twitch :) any help is appreciated

[whitetigerdemoness]

I was going to apologize for this taking so long, but it's actually only been a week and that isn't that long in the grand scheme of things. I've been distracted shit posting on https://discord.gg/geus6XM which is a breeding ground for Miraculous Ladybug au's. Pretty much all of them center around Nathaniel at this point but that is open to change. I also accidentally ship Nathaniel\Marinette\Marc\Luka now so *shrug emoji*

Foxes are very good at digging complex networks of tunnels. You never know where one might pop up.

Master Post of All Chapters

The moment Ladybug showed up was the exact moment everything went to hell. One moment they were curing the Shepard, who turned back into the wah-wah lacky from the hospital, and the next the group was fighting for their lives. Again. It had been a long twenty-four hours Viperion sighed to himself.

Between Ladybug and Penknight the scarlet akumas were falling at a steady rate. Between Scarlet Hawkmoth a female Chatnoir calling herself Panther, the heroes were dropping only slightly slower. Carapace had used his shelter early on to protect Night Hunter (a hero using the Tiger miraculous he was 90% certain was Adrien) from a flurry of Cataclysms. The turtle hero had been forced to retreat, his five minute time limit long since expired. Plumage had lost his fan in a similar manner, Panther turning it to dust with her Cataclysm before he could create a sentimonster. The new peacock hero was still an asset with his martial power, obviously trained in hand to hand, but he seemed to be tiring more quickly than he should. 

Sabrina was being protected by Queen Bee and Stardust as they tried to find a break in the wave of akuma’s to let her escape. Retriever had used her power to yank Ladybug to her side moments before Scarlet Hawkmoth could snatch her earrings, Ladybug having been pinned by scarlet akumas. Night Hunter was a flurry of claws as he felled akuma’s for Ladybug to purify. Rena Rogue was now helping Penknight fend off Panther, who was after his pen-sword to get his akuma. If they could only get some breathing room Viperion was certain the fox hero could create an illusion to give Sabrina enough cover so she could retreat and hopefully join up with Carapace in finding their kwamis food.

Viperion himself had used his second chance the moment Scarlet Hawkmoth showed up, but the power had expired long ago. He was grateful his miraculous didn’t seem to have a time limit like the others. Judging by how Panther was able to sling cataclysm after cataclysm, she didn’t either. He wondered what the factor was that decided that. He refused to believe it was because she was a better fit for the cat miraculous than Adrien had been. Viperion knew there were secrets within secrets surrounding the miraculous but having a firmer grasp on the ground rules would be nice. Using his power too many times close together made him tired, but didn’t detransform him. If Panther suffered the same problem she might take herself out of the fight soon with how liberally she was using her power.

“Rena, no!” Night Hunter shouted, hand outstretched to the fox heroine. Rena Rogue had had her feet swept out from under her by a scarlet akuma, going down hard. Panther was darting towards the downed heroine with a cataclysm ready. 

“Venom! Shit!” Queen Bee cursed, throwing her energized top. It was too late. The venom hit, paralyzing Panther, but not before she touched Rena Rouge’s miraculous. A horrified Alya clutched at the ashes of her miraculous as her transformation failed. Night Hunter, having tackled Panther only a second after the venom had hit, cursed and hit the ground. 

“Regroup!” Ladybug ordered, her yoyo spinning into a shield as she backed towards the downed girl. Night Hunter collected himself and removed the cat ring from Panther. She reverted a middle aged woman Luka didn’t recognize. Sabrina dived into Alya, hugging her fiercely as the girl stared in shock at her shattered miraculous.

“No!” Scarlet Hawkmoth growled. “Get them! Bring me their Miraculous!” The scarlet akuma fell on them with renewed vigor. 

“We could fight better if we weren’t protecting these guys.” Penknight snarled in frustration, furiously slashing at anything that got too close to their huddle. 

“We can’t just abandon them!” Stardust argued, using his staff like a baseball bat.

“Penknight is right.” Ladybug said. 

“I am?” He started, taken aback. Plumage slammed the scarlet akuma that jumped at Penknight in his distraction to the ground with a haymaker.

“Night Hunter, use your power to take Queenbee, Alya, Sabrina, Plumage, and Nathalie out of here. Feed your kwamis and re-transform if you can.” Ladybug ignored the various protests from the group. “Go. Now.” 

“But Ladybug...taking this many with me...I’m not sure I’ll be able to come back. I might pass out.” Night Hunter pleaded. Viperion winced. Normally Ladybug would never make such a dispassionate decision, but with Reverser’s alteration…

“Ladybug, are you sure?” Viperion gently asked while violently breaking a mixing bowl he had grabbed off an akuma over his knee. Ladybug gave him a cool, emotionless look as she snapped the butterfly out of the air. It sent shivers down his spine, and not good ones. “Maybe…” Viperion thought fast, “Using your lucky charm would reassure them?” He said, catching Night Hunter’s eye. Scarlet Hawkmoth was hanging back shouting orders as his akuma army tried to swallow them. It was only a matter of time before the man joined them in the assault, the horde was thinning.

“Lucky Charm.” Ladybug sighed rather than said. A red and black spotted pillow popped into existence. Her eyes darted around the battlefield in calculation. “Night Hunter, go. Now. Viperion, use your second chance. Penknight, create something above us. Anything so long as it provides a large shadow.” Penknight frowned at her but obeyed, using his creation to create a tent sized tarp about ten feet above them. Viperion nodded in what he hoped was a reassuring way at Night Hunter, who grit his teeth.

“I’m coming back for you, My Lady.” The current Tiger hero promised. “Shadow Step!” He shouted, the specified group sinking into the large shadow at their feet. The tarp fluttered sideways in the wind, tangling on a few akuma who easily ripped it apart. Scarlet Hawkmoth had not been idle. Using the tarp as cover, villain lept towards the sinking group with amazing speed. 

--------------

“Stardust!” Ladybug barked in command, shoving away an akuma that had tried to tackle her. “Stop him!” The goat hero swung his staff at Scarlet Hawkmoth, but he was too fast. Ducking under the boy’s attack he grabbed Night Hunter by the tail, yanking him out of the shadow. The rest vanished with terrified screams.

“This ends now!” Hakwmoth growled, ripping away the tiger and cat miraculous with one swipe. Adrien fell at his feet, exhausted by the energy it had taken to move so many people. He would deal with his son later. The boy had been brainwashed by Ladybug but no matter. Having his mother back would hopeful end this ridiculous rebellious phase. Emile had always known how to get their son to see reason. 

“Plagg, Noro, Unify.” Scarlet Hawkmoth growled, shoving the ring of the cat onto his own finger. He felt a great rush of power sweep over him like nothing he had ever experienced. If this was what just the cat and the butterfly felt like together he couldn't even begin to imagine how adding the ladybug would feel. He would know soon enough.

“Surrender Ladybug, and I’ll spare you.” He said, confidently striding forward as she backed away in fear. 

“No!” His wayward akuma shouted, valiantly trying to leap to her defense. He almost felt regret at the tearful expression of horror on the young woman’s face as he almost absently turned Penknight to dust with a superpowered cataclysm. The two remaining heroes, the goat and the snake, took up defensive positions in front of her. Scarlet Hawkmoth smirked, raising his hands, a cataclysm smoking in each one.

“No, please!” Ladybug begged, pushing to the front of the line. “Please. You’ve won. Take my miraculous, don’t hurt them.” She begged, pulling off her earrings.

“Of course not. I’m not unreasonable.” Scarlet Hawkmoth said, canceling the cataclysms to finally, finally, take his victory in hand. He hardly spared the plain looking young woman another glance, she was neither memorable nor important. 

“Father…” Adrien spoke, hesitant.

“Don’t worry my son, this will all finally be over soon. Your mother will come back to us and we will be a family again. Please understand, everything I have done has been to bring her back to us.” Scarlet Hawkmoth said, kneeling to place a hand on Adrien’s shoulders.

“She’s….she’s really coming back?” His son asked, tearful. Scarlet Hawkmoth nodded. Adrien clung to him in a hug. “Do it. I miss her so much, bring her back to us.” Briefly but strongly returning the hug, Scarlet Hawkmoth rose and adorned the ladybug miraculous.

“Tiki, Plagg, Unify.” The rush of power was euphoric, almost too much to bear. He was a god. No feat was beyond him now. Reaching out with his soul to the familiar one it yearned for, he pulled and….

---------

“Are you okay? You’re crying.” Penknight fretted, holding Stardust.

“I’m fine. It’s just...his dream...he misses her so much.” Stardust sniffled, wiping at his eyes. Ladybug gently eased the pillow lucky charm out from under Gabriel Agrest’s head. Stardust had managed to hit Scarlet Hawkmoth with his Sweet Dreams just moments before the man had grabbed Night Hunter, allowing the group time to escape. She saw Viperion sagging with relief out of the corner of her eye. It had taken a few Second Chance’s to set this up. The kwami she still had with her were cheering and hugging Noro, who was equally overwhelmed at the reunion. She was glad she had not needed to unify any of them with Tiki. She had been spread so thin the past couple days she wasn’t sure she could have handled the strain long enough to be useful.

“Say goodbye.” She instructed Stardust and Penknight. “Once I use my Lucky Charm he’ll likely revert to Nathaniel.” The akuma started towards her with a dark expression, but Stardust pulled him back.

“Let her.” He said, taking the akuma’s hands.

“But I’ll forget all of this. Everything that’s happened. I won’t be the person you fell in love with anymore, I’ll just be Nathaniel.” He spat the name like a curse. Stardust smiled at him gently and kissed him.

“You are Nathaniel. At least the most confidant part of him. I like that about you, I’m so shy it’s...comforting to know there’s someone more bold who cares for me.” Stardust pressed their foreheads together. “but I love the shy part of you too. I love the part of you that gets excited when he’s talking about a new akuma design he came up with. I love watching how serene you look while you’re drawing, and how kind you can be, even when someone doesn’t deserve it. I love all of you, and that will never change.” Penknight stared into his eyes for a moment, before sighing and pulling the green eyed boy close.

“Do it.” He said to Ladybug, face buried in Stardust’s hood. 

“Miraculous Ladybug.” She said without feeling, throwing the lucky charm in the air. Ladybugs swarmed around her, and all of a sudden the emotions she had been lacking slammed back into her. Viperion caught her as she stumbled to her knees, trying to catch her breath.

“Ladybug?” He asked in concern. 

“I’m fine, I’m fine. Just need a moment to get used to having emotions again. Oomf,” She breathed out. “I already kind of miss it, can’t feel stress without emotions.” She laughed a little too fast.

“I know a guy who runs a massage parlor if you’re up for it later?” Viperion offered with a smile.

“I may take you up on that.” She said shakily, burying her head in his chest. She couldn’t believe it was all finally over. Hawkmoth was defeated and she could finally rest. 

“Huh. I’m still here.” She turned her head to see Penknight poking himself in the chest with mild curiosity. Ugh. Well, at least he was a loose end that could wait a little while to finally tie up.

“Well, would you look at that. So am I.” Ladybug and Viperion shot to their feet, her earrings giving their first warning beep. Stepping out of the shadows, wearing the miraculous of the Bee, Fox, Turtle, Tiger, Dog, and Peacock was Volpina. Ladybug didn’t see Plagg with the other kawmi and sent a furious prayer that Adrien had gotten away from her safely and she wasn’t just hiding the Cat somewhere.

“Oh Ladybug, don’t look so shocked! You didn’t really think it would be that easy did you?” Volpina’s laugh rang in her head like a bell tolling. Maybe that was just the beeping from both her and Stardust’s miraculous. The fox akuma pointed her flute at Stardust. Penknight bristled and growled at her.

“I can’t believe Ladybug gave you a miraculous. Oh well, no matter. Mutton, Butterfly, or treacherous little human, I’m not picky about my dinner.” Volpina grinned, showing off wickedly sharp teeth. Marc’s miraculous beeped on final time, dropping his transformation. 

“This IS my lucky day.” Volpina laughed as Penknight shoved Marc behind himself and raised his sword in warning.

“You’ll never get passed me.” The male akuma growled. Volpina just smirked and laughed again.

“But I already have.” Ladybug saw the movement out of the corner of her eye and felt stupid. Of course the fox akuma would pull something underhanded like this, she thought in despair as Marc screamed, being dragged into his own shadow by a clawed hand. 

“MARC!” Penknight shrieked, diving for Marc’s outstretched hand. Their fingers brushed briefly before the boy was swallowed up. The mocking laughter of Volpina’s illusion echoed in Ladybug’s head long after it had dissolved into smoke.

[brandyxlynn91]

Galaxies Together pt. 6

Garrus was feeling a little down that Jane hadn't come visit him since taking down the doctor. He had told her he needed time to think but he had still hoped she'd continue her frequent visits. They were always the highlight of his time on the Normandy when they weren't out shooting Geth.

"What's wrong, turian? Missing a certain female commander?" Wrex teased from across the bay.

Shit, he noticed. Garrus thought but before he could retort they heard Jane on the comm.

"Wrex. Garrus. Suit up. We're reaching Feros." She told them.

Well, at least I'll get to see her and get some geth action, Garrus thought as he smiled.

As soon as they exited the Normandy, they saw geth attacking some colonists. They immediately stepped into action. He and Jane sniped the geth from a distance while Wrex did his usually deadly head butting whenever his shotgun started overheating. Afterwards, Garrus stole a glance at Jane but before he could say anything she had started running towards the colonists. After talking with the leader they learned that they were a small colony on the planet with the exogeni research facility. The leader told them that their big problem was the geth transmitter in the tunnels and they had mediocre problems that the other colonists could tell them about. Jane decided she wanted to talk to them. Upon doing so they found out they had a water shortage, a need for power cells, and a problem with an alpha varren. Upon asking about the colonists odd behavior, the leader just excused it as an effect of the geth attacks though Garrus noticed Jane didn't seem convinced. He also told them not to worry about the menial problems but Jane seemed determined to help them with everything. Yet again she showed such compassion even though it wasn't necessary of her. Garrus had learned to admire that about her, he even stopped arguing about it or pointing it out and just went along with it.

Inside the tunnels and through a doorway, they ran into the alpha varren and after taking the pack down and grabbing power cells, Jane mentioned something about wanting a varren as a pet. He thought she was joking but realized she was probably crazy and tough enough to handle one. Further into the tunnels, she had turned on the water pumps and they ran into a lone colonist. He seemed like he was trying to warn them about something but then he started yelling at himself and Garrus thought he was plain crazy. Jane tried to offer him help but he claimed she couldn't do anything and stopped talking. They then took out the transmitter and headed back. The colonists seemed grateful but were still acting odd. They decided it would be best to head for the exogeni facility, along the way Jane took out geth with the mako guns again, even though a few times he swore she was going to drive off the edge. They intercepted radio chatter and found some of the scientists holed up. Two of them were arguing about what to do. The woman seemed to be worried about her daughter and the man was telling her to forget about it. Jane told the woman she'd keep a lookout for her and upon asking they claimed not to know why the geth were attacking. After telling them to stay hidden, they continued to head towards the facility. Upon exiting the mako in the garage, a gunshot had barely missed Jane. Garrus immediately aimed his gun at the direction to see a scared young woman.

"Shit. I'm sorry. I thought you were a geth or varren." She apologized profusely.

"Look. It's fine. Just try not to do it again." Jane told her.

"Who are you?" Garrus inquired. He wasn't happy about her almost shooting Jane and was still holding up his gun.

"Easy Garrus. It was an accident. I'd be jumpy too if I was her." Jane told him.

"I- again I'm so sorry. My name is Lizbeth. I was trying to finish up some data when we evacuated and got stuck behind this forcefield." She timidly replied.

"Lizbeth? Your mother was looking for you." Jane told her then turned to Garrus. "Seriously, you can put the gun down."

"She's alive? Thank God." Lizbeth said gratefully.

"Do you know what's causing this forcefield?" She asked the girl.

"I think they have a ship powering it." She told them.

"Alright. Stay here. Guys, let's go take down this forcefield." Jane told them.

"I hope it involves blowing something up!" Wrex exclaimed.

"Probably. but we just got done blowing up geth on the bridge." Jane told him.

"Yeah but that was like over 20 minutes ago, Shepard." Wrex said while both she and Garrus just shook their heads while they headed into the building.

They took out the geth room by room until they came into a room where it looked like the geth was worshipping some kind of tech. They were puzzled about it but decided they needed to move on. They finally happened upon where the geth ship was attached to the building. Upon reading a note, they learned the bay doors that the ship's legs were attached to were being glitchy. Jane used this to her advantage to make the doors slam down on them, making the whole ship fall and blow up.

"Look at that. Your girly human is pretty resourceful." Wrex told Garrus while nudging him.

"Knock it off." Garrus told him even though he had grown impressed with how she handled situations like that.

"You guys say something?" Jane asked.

"Yeah! You sure know how to show a krogan a good time, Shepard. I mean we get to shoot geth and blow up their ships. Whoo!" Wrex exclaimed. At least he hasn't let Jane know about his teasing and suspicions Garrus thought. Jane just smiled at him and for some reason that made Garrus lose himself for a moment. After a little banter, they decided to go ask about this Thorian creature they found out about from the VI. Upon asking Lizbeth about the thorian, she confessed that it was some creature they found that seems to have mind control powers and the real reason she stayed behind was to try to get a message out because she didn't agree with using the colonists as test subjects.

Down the road, they heard arguing on the comm again and upon investigating they saw the man aiming his gun at the woman. Lizbeth ran over there before Jane could stop her so they were forced to show themselves. The man was yelling about exogeni forgetting them and that they were expendable in a panic. Jane somehow managed to use her charm to calm him down although Garrus would've personally preferred to shoot him. She told him she knew about the thorian and the colonists. He confessed to his involvement while the woman seemed generally confused. He told them that the thorian was under the colony but its control over the colonists would force them to die defending it from being found. Jane expressed the desire to find a way to not harm the colonists when the woman inquired that she could concoct a gas for their grenades that would simply knock them out. Jane agreed to it after finding out it wouldn't affect them at all.

"Remember do not kill the colonists." Jane told them.

"Are you sure this will work?" Garrus asked her. He was a bit skeptical.

"Well, we'll find out. Just don't shoot them. They're under mind control of that creature." She told him before they headed out. There she goes being all compassionate again he thought as he smiled. It used to annoy him as a hindrance but now he was happy to comply with her wishes.

Once reaching the colony, some zombie like thralls that were beyond saving were mixed with the colonists. Garrus and Wrex carefully shot down the thralls while Jane perfectly threw the knockout gas at the colonists. Upon reaching the crane control and lifting part of the building up to reveal a hidden tunnel the colony leader showed up with a gun. They all pointed their guns back. Jane tried reasoning with him but he was incoherently talking about being controlled before shooting himself in the head. Jane looked away for a moment and seemed bothered she couldn't help him before leading them into the tunnels. Upon entering they came across a giant plant like entity that spread throughout the tunnels.

"We're gonna need bigger guns." Jane expressed.

Then a green looking asari was spit out from the creature. The asari told them that Saren struck a deal with the thorian in exchange for a cipher for the prothean beacon, he would leave the thorian be. She then tells them that Saren betrayed it by sending the geth to attack it to prevent Jane from getting the cipher. The asari then called them meat bags and attacked. After taking her and the thralls down, Jane started shooting at the thorian roots attached to the walls. Garrus realized what she was doing and he and Wrex shot down the thralls as they came at her until she finally shot enough roots to knock it down, killing it. After wards, the asari came from a pod in the wall. She explained that she was with benezia and was left as a gift for the thorian from Saren. She then told them she could give Jane the prothean cipher for the beacon and linked with her just like Liara had done before. Jane seemed a little drained afterwards but said she was fine when Garrus asked. He wasn't sure if she really was but decided not to push it but he kept an eye on her as they headed out. Upon exiting they saw the scientists had rejoined the colonists. The colonists thanked them after they were asked if they were okay. The colonists and scientists told them they were gonna stay behind and rebuild. Jane double checked to see if they were okay before they headed back to the Normandy.

In conference, Liara offered to join minds again to see if the cipher helped. Afterwards she said it seemed to be a warning but still didn't understand what it meant.

Later on in the cargo bay, Garrus heard the elevator and was delighted to see Jane.

"Hey Garrus. You up for talking?" She asked.

"Yeah." He replied, trying to act casual despite his joy. "I wanted to thank you."

"Thank me?" She asked, seeming confused.

"Yeah. After what happened with the doctor, I've been thinking I might go back to C-sec. Of course, not before we take down Saren." He told her. It looked like she seemed conflicted for a moment but then she smiled.

"That's great!" She exclaimed.

"Yeah. You make fighting for the innocent seem a little easier than it felt before. I see everything you do and how you stick to your convictions has inspired me. I don't think I've met anyone like you before. I just--" He was telling her before he heard Kaidan on her comm asking her to come up.

"Yeah. One minute, Kaidan." She replied into her comm. "I'm sorry. You were saying?" She said turning back to Garrus.

"Uh, nothing. Just like I said I wanted to thank you and I can't wait to take down Saren." He said, feeling a little disappointed.

"Okay. Well, I'm proud of you, Vakarian." She told him before heading back.

"Well, that went smooth." Wrex laughed from his corner.

"You guys know that Alenko is sweet on her, right?" He heard Ashley say from the lockers.

"Oh. Looks like you have competition, pyjak." Wrex teased him.

"No. It's not like that." Garrus replied, defensively. Of course, he's sweet on her. He thought. Who wouldn't be? She's beautiful, strong, smart, charming, and resourceful. Then he shook himself off trying to get rid of those thoughts. Thinking she'd rather be with someone of her own kind anyways.

[concussed-to-pieces]

Wishful Thinking

Fandom: Mass Effect

Pairing: (Referenced) Kaidan Alenko/Female Shepard

Rating: Holy shit tame.

AN: Happy N7 Day, everyone! Starring the scene in ME2 that murdered anyone who romanced Alenko! Audio for 'About Horizon' can be found here. Enjoy!

The dream started the same every time. The only thing that changed was how he reacted to her.

He was screaming at her from across the Collector-strewn battlefield almost before he knew his body could move again. His biotics sang and raced over his skin with barely restrained power.

“Shepard!” His voice cracked but her head still turned. Those eyes...it was her. Back from the dead, scar-less, 'a china-doll shadow' was what Anderson had said. And no slight amount of anger in his words, at that. Cerberus had done more than overstep the bounds when they dragged Commander Shepard from the grave.

All that faded from Kaidan's mind as her eyes met his and widened gratifyingly. “Come here!” He yelled.

Tears started pouring down her cheeks, making Kaidan grit his teeth against the residual paralysis and begin to limp his way across the field. He tripped on some loose debris, cursing as he almost lost his footing. Shepard seemed to come alive at that, bolting for him and leaving her gun behind. “Kaidan!”

He caught her in his arms as she attempted to slide a hand to his shoulder to help him walk. “I know I'm being awful forward, Shepard. Forgive me later.” He choked out. Shepard nodded into his chest, biting her lip and allowing him to hold her. Her whole body shook with suppressed sobs. “Shhh, Shep. I can't even believe you're here. Let me have a few seconds with you before I wake up.” Kaidan whispered soothingly into her hair. “Just a few. I'll let you go soon.”

“Don't you d-d-dare Alenk-ko.” Shepard hiccupped, glaring up at him. Kaidan's heart clenched painfully. He had missed that face so much.

He ran his finger across the bridge of her nose, smooth skin where there had once been a pink scar. She flushed at the familiar motion and he cupped her cheek to make her look at him. “I know. And I don't care.” Kaidan murmured.

This is what I should have done.

Shepard's eyes filled with tears again and she clenched her jaw bravely. Her lower lip trembled when Kaidan bent slightly, searching her eyes with his own. “Shep...I uh...”

You died. And yet I still got you back.

It was Shepard's turn to hush him, her eyes full of understanding. “It's alright Kaidan. I've missed you so much.”

“So damn much.” Kaidan echoed, pressing his lips to hers. He hoped she would close her eyes, so she wouldn't see him crying.

“Kaidan...” She breathed when they parted, the sound of her voice sending his biotics into a frenzy like it used to before…before everything.

Kaidan couldn’t even find the words, couldn’t get them out past the lump of survivor’s guilt in his throat, and the dream Shepard faded away. He was alone in his bunk, the blanket pulled up to his shoulders with his single pillow tucked into his chest in an attempt to mimic the feeling of the Commander’s body against his own.

Jerky flashes of Shepard’s last moments had followed him for the past two years. The way her body had plummeted to the planet far, far below, his frantic screaming reverberating in the escape pod as he watched her fall, watched her burn up and die.

Later, he had taken a grim solace in the fact that she was definitely dead of asphyxiation before she hit the atmosphere. In the moment, though, Kaidan had nearly lost every hard-earned ounce of his control, nearly ripped the pod apart with his biotics.

He vaguely recalled being brought to a Med bay somewhere, his migraine at an intolerable level and the bright lights making him even more nauseous while someone slathered the back of his neck with medigel because he’d burned himself out, of course he had. Damn L2 implants, always failing at the worst times. Chakwas, God bless her, she’d put a towel over his head to block out the light and give him some privacy to sob and dry heave like a good Alliance marine.

Shepard. The Commander had been the axis which his world rotated on. Losing her had thrown Kaidan into a nightmarish new world, one where people didn’t seem to be able to stop talking about ‘honoring her memory’ and ‘it’s what she would have wanted’.

It rang hollow. It always did.

The Council still didn’t seem to understand that the Reapers were coming. Sovereign hadn’t been a Geth dreadnought or whatever crap they were calling it this week. Whole colonies were vanishing and the Council continued to twiddle their appendages over it. Some days Kaidan wanted to take every member of the Council by the shoulders and shake them back and forth while shouting why won’t you do something?! How many more humans need to die before you’ll do something?!

And then the rumors had started circulating. About Shepard, and Cerberus. About Shepard working for Cerberus. Kaidan didn’t believe it for the longest time. Even after Anderson had basically confirmed that the intel was legitimate by refusing to speak any further on it, Kaidan couldn’t wrap his head around it.

The attack on Horizon had assisted in his comprehension. Because it was Shepard, it was Shepard. Paler than he remembered, a little thinner. Dark circles under haunted eyes and missing her scar. Like an idiot (as usual), Kaidan had reacted before he thought. He’d hugged her, and then pushed her away. So different from his dreams, where he held her and kissed her and just let his heart rest easy for a few minutes.

“You betrayed the Alliance. You betrayed me!” He hadn’t meant to sound so infuriated. He was hurt, of course he was hurt, he had loved her. A part of him still did. A part of him that might be all of him.

“Kaidan, you know me.” She had pleaded with him and he’d looked away, unable to meet her eyes. “You know I’d only do this for the right reason.”

“I know where my loyalties lie, Shepard.”

Didn’t that just sit bitter in his throat. Loyalty and duty and honor, always the good soldier Alenko. He knew where his loyalties laid.

With Shepard.

With the Alliance.

Shepard, his heart begged while his mind shouted Alliance! She was still doing good. Still working to stop the Collectors. Why the hell did he have to act like working with Cerberus was the ultimate betrayal? If he was being honest, the reason why he’d been so upset was because she hadn’t contacted him. Christ, it was selfish but anything.

Kaidan rubbed his eyes and rolled over onto his stomach, resting his head on his arm. The datapad beside him lit up when he pulled it closer, one eye shut as he began typing.

Shepard,

I’m sorry for what I said back on Horizon…

…

The message sat in his outbound box for months, a little empty circle next to it to indicate that it was unread. He tried to forget about it. Sometimes he went a few days without checking. Kaidan was unsure if the address he’d sent it to was even functional anymore, but he had to at least try to apologize.

Not only because he’d loved her once (still loved her), but because he was wrong to accuse her if he didn’t know the whole story. She had brought up a valid point. The Shepard he had known (and loved) would never sign on with a group like Cerberus unless she wholeheartedly believed there was a good reason to. He would just have to trust her judgement on this one.

And then one night, the circle was filled in.

Kaidan stayed up later than he intended to (cycling the inbox over and over), woke up with bare minutes to prepare for his shift the next morning. Stumbling through the day in a bleary-eyed daze, he missed the ping! on his Omni-tool.

So as he bedded down for the evening, the new message from that familiar address came as a definite shock. He sat bolt upright, then hunched over the datapad and hungrily absorbed the words in front of him.

Kaidan,

Didn’t want to risk incriminating you while still on Cerberus’ payroll. Also didn’t have the guts to tell you. But we’re going through the Omega-4 relay in a little under an hour and I don’t know if I’m coming back from this one. This is selfish and stupid of me, I’m sorry. I know that if I don’t come back, this will only make things harder for you as far as moving on goes.

The Omega-4? Kaidan’s stomach lurched. The Illusive Man was firing her and her crew off into deep space, Jesus Christ. A suicide mission.

I love you so much, Kaidan. Your heart, your dedication to the Alliance, the way you were always my voice of reason. I’m so sorry that our time together was cut short. If I still have a chance with you, if I come back, I’d love to take you out for a night on the Citadel. Just you and me, drinks and my goofy dancing.

If I don’t though, if I don’t come back or if my luck and the Illusive Bastard’s patience runs out, I need you to promise me that you’ll find someone else. Kaidan I don’t want you to hurt. I want you to be free and whole, not tethered to some old ghosts of a Commander.

Tears welled up in his eyes and the words in front of him blurred together into an unreadable mess. Kaidan tried to steady himself, tried to get a grip on his feelings. It did him no good to bawl his eyes out in his bunk room.

I want you to be happy and safe.

A sob hitched in his chest, making his throat ache. Kaidan couldn’t help the wounded noise he let out.

I love you, Kaidan.

She hadn’t signed the message. She never had before. That lent some credibility to the missive. Beneath the unfamiliar Cerberus armor was the woman he had loved (still loved). And she was in danger. She hadn’t wanted him to worry but now, in a surprising flash of selfishness, she had damned the consequences and replied to him. The what-ifs ran hot and heavy through his mind for a minute.

All he could do now was wait, he realized grimly. Wait for her to come back from where no one had ever returned. Wait for her to send an all-clear. Wait for her.

Wait for her.

For Shepard, he didn’t care how long it took.

Shepard,

I’ll be counting on you to come home safe. For the both of us. I'm looking forward to some shore leave...

[justinmoviereviews]

The Class of 2019

As always, just trying to catalog what I saw this year. Let’s do this shit.

1917 - Sam Mendes

I’ve never seen a war movie like this. I’ve never seen something that was so empty, so decayed and lifeless. Usually these things are about honor or brotherhood or whatever. This one was a horror movie. Gothic. Disturbing. And credit Dunkirk for helping everyone else realize that war movies should be told in the present tense.

Uncut Gems - Bennie and Josh Safdie

Good Time was better because it’s rawness was more painful. Because it’s kineticism was more sociological. Because it physically hurt to watch it. And because Robert Pattinson is a better actor than Adam Sandler (my sincere apologies). But these guys have figured out to a science how to film desperation and visceral consumption and need; they chronicle the ugliest parts of the mind and shoot them in the ugliest parts of New York. 

Little Women - Greta Gerwig

Oh no, I’ve lost interest in writing these. Greta Gerwig is sharper than the average writer, and is going to get a lot of mileage writing interesting female characters, which will keep me occupied way longer than, for instance, JJ Abrams writing Strong Female characters so he gets to keep his third house. But look for this refrain whenever I see good movies that aren’t really made for me, my favorite character here was Timothee Chalamet, popping up sporadically to mack (suavely!) on all three sisters.

Bombshell - Jay Roach

Structurally it’s a little bit of a mess, but Megyn Kelly playing detective to an internal corporate scandal works surprisingly well.

The Two Popes - Fernando Meirelles

Some nitpicks: this movie engages with the child abuse a little bit, but it doesn’t offer any resolution--how could it? The scandal is ongoing, and has mired the legacy of Francis, the good Pope, just like it mired his predecessor’s, the bad one. And some of the dialogue is a little trite; was Benedict this much of a close-minded conservative? Was he really this bad at selling his own vision of the church? I also wonder if movies seem smaller now that we’re watching them all on our TVs. But mostly I thought this was fantastic. I love movies about ideas centered around conversation, and this one does it with so much humanism. The Pope as a role is one of the most complex, elite and fascinating people on the planet. This movie comes so much closer to showing that than I thought it would.

Marriage Story - Noah Baumbach

A cursory search of images from this movie for this post makes me realize how well it’s shot--maybe this really was meant to be his Scenes From a Marriage. It isn’t--he’s not a good enough director to ever be Bergman, he’s too burdened by the things he likes and thinks about, like hipster references and witty repartee--but this is the best movie of his I’ve ever seen. Funny, sharp, and if it isn’t a universal depiction of the disillusion of love, it’s empathetic and compassionate about two characters he likes and cares about. Adam Driver is the best actor working right now. Scarlett Johansson can’t quite keep up, but who could?

Ford v Ferrari - James Mangold

Fast cars and the manly men who build them. This could have been better--the writing is a little too beholden to a generic structure that’s beneath the A+ power of Matt Damon and Christian Bale, who are, straight up, two of our finest actors. Ideally this flick just lets these two dudes dick around for 150 minutes. But fuck man, this shit rocks.

The irishman - Martin Scorsese

This is the calm gangster movie made by a bunch of men who haven’t had to hustle in 30 years. Scorsese is a smart guy, so he probably knows that a de-aged Robert De Niro isn’t going to be as resonant as some young hotshot trying like hell to make a name for himself. It makes the movie weirdly low-stakes, and it only truly comes alive at the end, when De Niro is looking back on his life and facing his regrets, like a man in his 80s ought to be. But look, Scorsese is one of the best to ever do it, and gangster movies are where he lives. If this is mostly a retrospective on four of the best careers to ever track through Hollywood, and I sort of think it is, it’s still got ten scenes that will stand up against any of our man’s best.

The Laundromat - Steven Soderbergh

Steven Soderbergh does The Big Short. Turns out he’s also pretty good at it.

The Lighthouse - Robert Eggers

Robert Eggers is a formalist who understands that movies can be about whatever they want as long as they look good and sound good. This is a movie about, I think, madness. Just madness, just the idea of being isolated and going mad. If you’re wondering, like I was, if that’s enough of a theme to hang a whole movie on (I mean, these things are expensive), well, I think the point of this one is that it’s weird as fuck, it looks real good and it sounds real good. 

Parasite - Bong Joon Ho

This movie is at it’s best when it’s at it’s weirdest. I like Bong most when he’s using a heightened absurdity to point out the ways in which our political systems are unforgivable. 

Motherless Brooklyn - Edward Norton

I know it was in the book, but the Tourette’s syndrome of the main character seems to me like a postmodern tic, like making a straight noir in 2019 wasn’t enough for a studio that assumed audiences would need some kind of a 21st Century bent. I don’t think it adds much to the story, so I want it out there that this is just such a good fucking straight noir. I would personally finance it if they made like three of these a year. 

High Flying Bird - Steven Soderbergh

Soderbergh is gonna need to get over his love affair with the iPhone camera--someone needs to remind him that movies can look a lot better than this--but this is the kind of movie that could have been and maybe started as a play. Things happen off camera and all you see is characters talking about them after the fact. But the writing is phenomenal. Snappy and smart. Maybe my favorite script of the year.

Joker - Todd Phillips

Upon further review, I think this movie never should have been made, but I do like it. I’m not a purist, frankly I think comic book movies are for nerds, but what makes the Joker powerful is that he doesn’t have a backstory. This movie isn’t good enough to justify giving him one, but it’s so ambiguous and strange that it doesn’t ruin anything either. I spent a lot of time wondering if the events of the movie actually happened, or if they were all in the protagonist’s head. I guess the answer is that it doesn’t really matter: if it all did happen it would destroy the throughline of the Nolan movies, and if it all didn’t it would make the movie kind of lame. Ultimately it’s a story about a discarded man who learns that evil gives him a control he never had before. That’s a heavy topic to make a movie about, and a better movie would have been heavier. But  it’s still an interesting watch, and Joaquin Phoenix goes to the places the movie itself won’t.

Ad Astra - James Gray

I have nothing against pretentious movies. Some of my best friends are pretentious movies! But if you’re going to be as solemn and portentous as this one is, I think your thesis needs to be a little more insightful than that love is important. This movie looks fantastic. It’s got killer monkeys in it, and an Apocalypse Now meets 2001 pedigree. It should have been a lot better.

It Chapter Two - Andy Muschietti

Ugh, this one was not good. The writing is pretty bad, storylines open up and fizzle out without going anywhere, the structure is simple to the point of being lazy. The first one was so good, and this is just a crappy cash-in. Oh well. 

Once Upon a Time...in Hollywood - Quentin Tarantino

Look, Tarantino is probably my favorite director. Pulp Fiction is the movie that first taught me to love movies, and he’s never in his life made an artistic choice that I didn’t intuitively understand. I don’t think anyone else has justified their otherworldly self-confidence more than he has. If other directors are more artistically or technically accomplished, I’d struggle to find anyone who better put the thoughts and images in their brain onto celluloid better than him. If this had been made by some new hotshot named Chris Anderson or something, I’m buying a poster of it and telling everyone who will listen about the breakout auteur of the decade. But for the first time in my entire life, I wondered what Tarantino’s point was. Why did he make this movie? The highlight, for me, is Leonardo DiCaprio, who since Django Unchained has apparently realized that he’s at his best when he’s hamming it up and having a blast.

Midsommar - Ari Aster

Two movies in, Ari Aster has mastered tone. My man is in control of his movie from frame one, and the result is that his stuff feels smart. This one wasn’t as wild or unexpected as Hereditary--in fact the most surprising thing about it is that it really isn’t surprising at all; it’s about a sinister cult in northern Sweden, and it hits all the beats that tagline would suggest. But that’s not the same as saying it’s predictable--he still has a gift for ultraviolence, and he hovers in a space that forces you to prepare yourself for anything. My only complaint is that I wish it had been more of a mindfuck. It’s ultimately a simpler movie than you might hope for. But this guy isn’t going anywhere. He’ll be on the prestige list for as long as he wants.

The Perfection - Richard Shepard

If Allison Williams is going to make a career out of deconstructing overachieving white girls, I don’t want it to get lost that she is also insanely hot. Like, just so hot. Anyway, this is one hell of a grindhouse flick, all the way down to being a little less pleasant than you’d expect or even really want. Watch it on a Saturday afternoon and feel a little queasy afterwards.

Avengers: Endgame - Anthony and Joe Russo 

Look, I don’t know what to say to you if you take these movies seriously. You probably wouldn’t like my blog anyway. I thought this was a really good ride. If you have problems with the plot holes or the character inconsistencies, I might recommend catching something other than the final installments of global franchises that are obligated to gross two billion dollars.

Us - Jordan Peele

If Jordan Peele were a quarterback he’d be Deshaun Watson--a top level talent who’s going to be relevant for at least the next ten years. Get Out was a statement, a cheap little movie from one half of a decent sketch comedy show that blew the doors off the tavern and walked in so much smarter and better than anyone was prepared for. But right now, sitting on my couch, Us is the movie I want to watch. It was never going to be as surprising as Get Out because this time out our expectations were so much higher. But this is the kind of movie I ultimately want him to make his fortune with--funny, scary, worth talking about afterwards. A horror movie from a guy with interesting ideas who’s been given the keys to do whatever he wants.

Glass - M. Night Shyamalan

I caught this bad boy in January. At the time I figured there was no way I’d remember anything about it by the end of the year. I don’t. 

[vehlika-pelican]

warning for long post! i always get my best ideas at night when im on mobile and cant do a read-more. sorry. blacklist "vehl's headcannons" to stop seeing my stuff. no rvb season 15 spoilers i dont think. me3 is like 5 years old now so im not tagging it as spoilers for any of the games. OKAY, RVB X MASS EFFECT TRILOGY CROSSOVER ( mostly ME 1 because its been two hours since i started writing this post now and oh shit) #TuckerFightsARobotArmy is gonna be the tag for this and the inevitable sequel posts at first i thought, with default Femshep being a badass red-head that would make our local badass red-head Carolina the obvious choice for the role but it occurred to me that she would make a better Miranda Lawson than Commander Shepard. The Director is The Illussive Man (Tim). Aside from the daddy issues, Miranda is a big supporter of Tim's until she finally sees his dark side and resigns during the end of ME 2 just like Carolina was a staunch believer in the Director until she had to face the music. The Freelancers are involved in Project Phoenix and ultimately its every man for himself when the Director starts indoctrinating/reaperfying troops. She gets assigned to the Normandy SR-2 just before the agents make their escape and she's left out of the loop and feeling betrayed. She carries that well into hunting the Collectors and her loyalty mission involves maybe saving York and getting answers. Carolina goes into hiding just like Miranda during ME3, trying to take down her former employer and his organization on her own until she needs help. Thats where our best dudes come in. but then if she's taking the place of Miranda, who could be Shepard? let's start with the Reds. Sarge is too...Sarge. Maybe he could take Admiral Hackett's place as Admiral Colonel Sarge because obviously (everyone knows he's crazy but going from enlisted man to fleet admiral makes him a legend, and he really earned a name for himself during the First Contact War. that name was legally changed to Colonel.) Grif would be Joker, so our esteemed pilot/vehicle operator who's all back-talk and bitching. Simmons is where it gets tricky. Simmons could be an engineer, possibly a quarian, who got prosthetic limbs from when he temporarily served with Sarge on a joint human-quarian deployment and became enamored with the freedom to experiment in the Alliance opposed to the strict policies in the Migrant Fleet and sought to return to his service by trying to kiss ass. but i also like him as EDI because of the proximity to Grif and how they would develop that friendship leading up to Joker's Mission when Grif unshackles Simmons to save the Normandy in ME 2. i also kind of like krogan!Grif, and you know the two of them would have the greatest time messing with the Alliance's engineers during the retrofits. then when Simmons gets a body in ME3 he tries to get a faux-skin to look human but there's a problem and its missing in places on the left side and Grif decides to tell people he's just got some prosthetics from an accident. all shiny and chrome on the fury road. Donut is Kelly Chambers. trained in psychology but rarely clinical, loving all the species, somehow spreading a space-dog STD around the ship, a bit too naive if pretty gung-ho about the mission but give him a belt of lift grenades and hot damn we're in business. Lopez is the AI who robbed the bank? embezelled money? (ME 1) and threatened to detonate a nuclear bomb inside a shopping center but actually managed to buy and download himself into a ship and set sail for sweet robot freedom in the Persius Veil. he was caught by Sarge and officially "destroyed" when he's really locked in a Rampart mech with AI shackles that force him to aid Sarge in his crazy science endeavors. he refuses to speak anything other than spanish out of spite even when he genuinely needs assistance. now the Blues. Washington will have been with Cerberus until about the beginning of ME3 which is when Tim starts indoctrinating troops and members of Project Phoenix take their chances so thats too late to start trying to save the galaxy from the Reaper threat. Caboose takes the place of David (i might be getting the name wrong), an autistic savant who can communicate with a race of alien AI (the quarian-made geth) and is unwillingly mentally linked to the geth for an unknown period of time by his own brother (one of his sisters then? my poor boy imsorry). This would cause the neural trauma/scarring resulting in Caboose being... more Caboose. but he isn't found until sometime in ME2 by Shepard and co. Freckles is the mad AI who goes rogue on Luna (not EDI or part of Simmons in this au) but ends up being befriended by Caboose. he inhabits an Atlas/Titan mech and together they're unstoppable. Tex is an attempt to recreate Allison as an AI inside a cloned body made by the Director during the early stages of his madness. now she's taking Ashley's place as a trigger happy space racist, a double agent inside the Alliance and on Tucker's squad. Church almost dates her but something...feels off...and instead spends his time fighting with her because it feels...familiar? like when he used to argue with his mom when she was alive. huh. Kaikaina and Grif petitioned to serve together so she's on the squad as an infilitrator of all things. she and Wrex commiserate over the story of how she stole a krogan warlord's biotic hammer and she tramatizes Grif by flirting with his 800-pound ass. (not that it goes anywhere. Wrex thinks humans are too squishy.) which leaves...Tucker. because who else. Commander Shepard took the responsibility of proving the existence and defeating the Reapers only because they happened to be at Eden Prime when the prothean beacon was to be recovered. it could have been anyone caught in the beacon- Ashley or Kaidan or any other marine- and that person would have tried to do the same. Tucker in RVB isnt so much chosen to be the savior of an alien race (Doc said he was but that was more Junior) as he gets caught in a bunch of shit that went down in ways he was not expecting when he interacted with an ancient alien artifact thank you very much. so he's on the Normandy SR-1 because he's an N7-in-training or outright failed to get past N1 (which is still impressive because he was considered and thats not easy criteria to meet. let my man be a badass space marine. just a little bit. badass-in-training. HE'LL GET THERE.) but is noticed for his potential and is to be evaluated by turian!/salarian!Felix for Spectre candidacy. the first human Spectre. he's a biotic, i can't decide between adept and vanguard. Tucker and Grif are Totally On To the mission's importance because "spectre's(Felix) dont come along for shake-down runs" in their new experiental human-turian ship and they arrive at Eden Prime mid-attack. Tucker and his squad try to clear a path to the beacon while Felix scouts ahead. but then they find his body and eyewitnesses say it was someone he knew by name that shot him once he let his guard down and his back was turned. "Locus" they say. supposedly leading the assault with an army of heretic-geth and a massive ship emitting a terrible sound. they fight to the beacon, disable bombs along the way, and find it just as Locus's ship departs. as the squad's engineer is scanning it, Tucker notices they're starting to levitate and rushes in to grab them and throw them aside only to get caught himself. he gets the prothean vision-warning about the Reapers and maybe a special prothean omni-blade and its on. he has to prove to the Citadel Council that their Spectre Locus is a traitor and that the Reapers are real but visions? galactic extinction cycles? oh you humans are so full of it. you've been part of the galactic community for 30 years and now you're here with a conspiracy theory at best? i cant believe we thought you could work for us. blah. Tucker marches off but meets Church who's been trying to take Locus down from within the system to no avail. Alpha!Church is the Director's son but Allison got custody after the divorce and now he's a grouchy C-Sec cop getting nowhere real quick. Tucker invites him along and he's a shitty sniper but actually pretty decent with the Mako's cannon considering it handles like a drunk krogan who can do a flip it you drive off the cliff edge fast enough (what are mass effect booster jets for?). they track down a krogan mercenary (Wrex is probably still Wrex. because who could hope to live up to him?) and fight through a strip club and kill Fist and rescue a quarian (Palomo? make that Jensen) with evidence proving Locus is guilty. then they save Dr. Emily Grey and help her keep her small clinic in the wards from being shut down and she gives them sweet discounts and all the free medigel they can shove into their pockets. they rescue asari!Doc from inside a prothean ruin (got lost on a yoga retreat and panicked when geth started attacking...i guess he could be an archeologist but maybe they drag Grey along for the ride instead...) but he's developed a split personality due to how long he's been alone in there and its kinda murderous but coupled with biotics its pretty useful. (and yes, asari are mono-gendered and are all "female" but ME: Andromeda confirmed that some asari use masculine pronouns/identify as "male" and there's no way that wasn't a thing in ME 1 canon so Doc is he/him). on Virmire, he almost shoots Tex AND Wrex on the beach- put down your shotguns you fucking lunatics i will biotically throw you into the ocean! he helped Wrex get his family armor so Tucker manages to talk him down but man Tex could you chill its been months already. he has to leave Tex behind though to protect the bomb while he and Wrex save Kaikaina and Kirahee and fight Locus. they evacuate and the bomb detonates and atleast it was instantaneous. she wouldn't have felt herself be vaporized, it was quick and we stopped Locus from getting an army of krogan. Church is devastated and knowing that Tucker leaving Tex behind was a conscious choice splinters their friendship. but. Tucker has to finish this. its bullshit and why us. why'd it have to be us on this ship in this life shewasmyfriendtoo- but its a race against the clock to the lost relay and Ilos and theres no time to have a real talk. its complete bullshit. they get to Ilos but Locus is ahead of them and they have to fight so many geth and find a 50,000 year old message which only Tucker can understand but fuck this we're being left in Locus' dust openthisstupid templedoor*swish* oh shit this things a fucking key "guess we didnt have to fight all them robots" he said stepping over the mountain of slain robots because fuck my life. Wrex how'd you live so long life fucking sucks. "i've been drunk for a lot of it" great. yup. can the Mako go any faster. and then they meet Vigil but dont record it because they're still idiots who forget/dont mind the details until Simmons shows up in the sequel you morons but hey remember THAT CHASE WE WERE IN LETSGO and they drive the Mako into a relay and if Tucker made sure to crash into a geth colossus no one says anything- and they fly out into the Presidium Commons like if the Mako had wings but itfuckingdoesnt and why are there even jets on this tank. Locus and Sovereign beat them to the Citadel and the arms are closed but Hal-9000 over there is just chillin' on the Citadel Tower like he's shishing the kebab himself. then gravity goes off and they fight sideways all the way up the tower and those turrets sure are being turrets you know and not differentiating between us and the assholes ahead of us. but they finally make it and stop Locus short of the apocalypse. Tucker goes all renegade Locus was just afraid, the Reapers put his life in persepective and we are all so small and insignificant, "is servitude not preferable to extinction?" you're just a puppet, they're using you because you're weak, because you let them, do yourself a favor-! but Locus claims its too late and they fight and kill him. but he rises anyway. the fight the first and only Possessed Marauder- Sovereign controlig Locus' corpse through implants. he was mostly implants. and once its ash ashashashes Tex didnt even get to be ashes its unfa- and Sarge is over the comm, open the Citadel's arms son so the Alliance can save the day and Tucker has a choice. save the Council and sacrifice thousands of soldiers. or kill the Reaper and worry about new leadership later. its Tex again. worse. i need to think, theres no time, you know what this thing can do you saw in the vision i believe you so what do we do. make the call. and Tucker needs the Council's support...but the Reaper needs to be killed...but saving the Council will cost too much...but the Reaper could still call the others from dark space...they'll trust me... will the new ones? will the Alliance? Anyone? no. but someone will definitely be alive. kill Sovereign. the Council dies. the Destiny Ascention is destroyed. the Alliance suffers minimal loses. humanity fills the vacuum of power. humanity is no longer trusted. they blame him. he does too. have any of his choices been good enough? right? much of the crew goes their own way. Church goes back to C-Sec. maybe he'll call. Wrex returns to Tuchanka, faith in his people restored. Doc joins Grey at her small clinic. Jensen returns to the Migrant Fleet with geth data. and Tucker and the rest are... disgraced. no one says but they dont have to. every breath is a reminder of his failures and what he did. so much potential in him once, they say. he could have been great. instead he did this. and they fight geth. chase geth. fight more. they head to Alchera. more geth, they said. it isnt. the ship is blown apart. Kaikaina shoves anyone who cant walk into the escape pods. The XO is killed almost immediately. Grif won't leave. Tucker, please, Dex! Get Dex! she yells as she's dragged into an escape pod by a Yeoman and he storms over because he wont lose anyone else but the hull is gone and you can't run in mag boots. Grif is fighting for Normandy. Tucker can hear him asking for just a little more just enough to- to- but Tucker's having none of it and pulls and heaves and forces his idiot pilot into the pod. of all the times Grif chose to be the opposite of lazy. a streak of yellow catches his eye and its coming this way and he pushes off and hits the launch button but the engines blow and he hits something as he is set adrift. he's losing air. fuck, its- its behind him. he panics and scrambles for the puncture but his arms are geting heavier and he's already wheezing short little breaths shortlittlefailures youfailedyoukilledthem youkilledher. the sun in the distance is bright. he can feel his body tilt toward the planet, sees the sunlight cresting over the horizon. his vision goes dark around the edges. but the sun is bright and he doesnt notice he isnt afraid and he falls *maniacal laughter* someone should have stopped me. i think its super out of character but this is a rambling monster and not meant to go super in-depth or anything. god help me.

[felassan]

been thinkin bout ol man drack

Thinking about Drack like... he’s more than 1400 years old. With the AI launching in 2185 CE, that means he was born rouuughly (emphasis on the roughly, we don’t have a figure more specific than “1400+” and we don’t know how long he’s been kickin it in Andromeda for by the time we wake up) around the year 785 - that’s near the end of the 8th century, right? pls correct me if any of my math in this post is wrong, I’m dyscalculic and also no historian loool. but anyway trying to put it in perspective like -

On Earth, around the time he was born, Vikings were beginning to raid the coasts of Europe; Beowulf was written; it was the reign of Charlemagne; iron horseshoes had not long been in common use. Not long after, the classic Maya collapse occurred and the first known printed book was made in China. During his lifespan, whole kingdoms and empires rose and fell, whole peoples were wiped out, there was the Islamic Golden Age, the Age of Discovery, the Renaissance, the Industrial Revolution, the information age, humanity began exploring space.. and on a wider level, in galactic history, he was born before the First Contact War between humans and turians, before quarians had to live on ships and wear envirosuits, before the geth gained self-awareness and the Morning War, before Rakhana was environmentally decimated, before turians were even granted a seat on the Council.. 

what’s most notable is definitely what he’s seen in the history of his own species. he must have seen so much in that length of time. and it sure sounds like it from what we know, since he’s so grizzled and has worn the titles of soldier, mercenary, pirate, veteran... he was born less than 100 years after the turians unleashed the genophage on the krogan. and that makes me like - from the time he was young, the older Drack grew, the longer he lived, the more his entire species declined. I don’t know how long it takes a krogan child to mature, but I don’t think it’s long given what we know. he may therefore have been old enough to fight in the tail-end of the Krogan Rebellions (those scattered insurgent activities continued for decades). he would have had peers who remembered pre-genophage times, and he could have had parents or other older relatives who remembered the start of the Krogan Rebellions, the voracious krogan expansion across different worlds, the Rachni wars, when salarians made contact and uplifted the krogan.. he never saw the golden glory of ancient-ancient krogan society that we learned about in ME3, they’d already destroyed Tuchanka in their own nuclear war and become primitive warring tribes long before of course, but still.. he was born not long after the genophage-inflicted decline.

he saw [note: not using “saw” here literally] the stillborn and the infant mortality, the low probability of viable pregnancies, the decrease in population numbers. yes, the krogan were expanding in a galactically-problematic way, but from a krogan’s perspective - they were subdued and forced to accept the terms of surrender, they were unable to replenish their numbers as they had done before. he saw the decline of his race but more than just the rates and stats, it was.. aah, their very like, spirit declining? he saw krogan try crazy and obscene foolish things in their quest to be cured - transplants, genetic treatments.. he saw fertile females become prizes of war to be viciously fought over, and the warlord Shiagur use her fertility as a bargaining chip to build an army. he saw individuals like Okeer do the vilest of shit like selling members of his own kind to the Collectors to obtain the tech he needed for his mad experiments. remember the pain Maelon’s experiments caused? Drack also saw many individual krogan become bitter, individualistic, self-interested, resigned to their species’ fate, directionless, fatalistic.

Over the last millennium krogan numbers have steadily declined, leaving them a scattered and dying people. they are indifferent to who they attack or kill, or what risks they take, as their species is doomed

Okeer (a veteran of the Rebellions who I think was of comparable age) believed that the krogan became weaker with every generation. the whole thing just makes me feel sad for Drack living through that and watching it all happen. and I wonder - how has bearing witness to that decline shaped and influenced him as a person? Okeer had become like, a mad scientist. Drack’s got a clan, and it seems like most of them joined the Initiative under the leadership of Kesh. does Drack have hope for their future in the new galaxy? what does he think about the future for krogan in Andromeda? Or maybe he's like those old people who stopped giving a shit thirty years ago and does whatever the hell they want because damn if they haven't earned the right!

on a lighter note: Ryder could have lived their 22 years over 60 times in that time period.. or lived out nine 150-year human lifespans (by the time of the games humans can live to about 150 years of age).. Ryder’s 22 years are only 1.5% of Drack’s lifespan.. if Drack’s 1400 years were equivalent to 1 year, Ryder has only been on the scene for like.. 5 days! thinking about it makes my head spin a lil. we are such young pups. we had some of this sort of thing in Samara, who was almost 1000. sitting talking to her with her ageless meditative calm and seemingly infinite wisdom, looking out of the viewport at the stars while listening to her talk about her experiences, her history, her views on morality and humans and life and the universe and everything.. definitely one of my favorite parts of ME2. my Shepard found a rare sort of timeless peace in talking to Samara.

Drack is obviously gonna come at the Old Guy trope from a completely different angle, being a cranky krogan soldier who likes to shoot and blow shit up, but still. aaaaaah. this dude is a veritable dinosaur that has seen Some Shit™, and I want him to tell me all about it.

[sleepymarmot]

Andromeda liveblog: day one

Spoilers!

Eos/Tempest:

The Vault is beautiful! Even though the moving bridges, just like the floating rocks on Habitat 7, are blatantly copy-pasted from Trespasser.

Drack said the fight was fun. Of course it was -- that was the first time I used Annihilation/Charge/Nova!

Military or science -- how is that even a question? :D

Even back in the trial, I instantly became fond of the Tempest crew, in a way different from the Normandy. Not bound by the blood they spilled together -- but a team of nerds and people taking care of those nerds, pretty much. Feels more like the Enterprise!

What helps is that there's already a net of relationships between everyone -- I was thinking about it when Drack was revealed to be Kesh's father and talked about their problems with Tann and their relationship with Vetra. The Nexus backstory really gives depth to this game.

I didn't expect this, but I actually do like Peebee! Since her first trailer appearance, I've been annoyed with her -- obligatory asari LI, shitty design with a sexualized outfit and eyebrows, manic pixie dream girl-ish image -- but her personality won me over. She's a bit similar to my Ryder, and they clicked instantly -- two young, energetic explorers. And she doesn't seem too quirky so far, just a very extroverted nerd. And she has something nice to say about everyone on the ship!

You know, I've been wishing for a romance with a nerdy but genuinely nice person (unlike a certain elf...) and looks like I have not one but two -- and female! -- options here! :D 

The first flirt option with Peebee is good, the second is not.

Ah yes, a readheaded religious wlw written by the same person as Leliana... Look, Leliana is special to me, but this is just annoying. Maybe because Leliana is special.

Another convo with Vetra: "Someone had to know" "Did your father?" "I'm not sure" LOOK THE CONFIRMATIONS JUST KEEP ROLLING IN

Oh, here comes the flirt option I've seen on Youtube! I feel a bit awkward hitting on both of them repeatedly... Will I, on my seventh Bioware game, finally encounter a jealousy conversation?

Peebee has attractive personality, but Vetra's fashion style is obviously superior.

*looks at Liam's handsome face, sighs and stops herself from hitting the heart because that'd be a bit too much*

Nexus/Hyperion:

I love that Tann is the only real politician around, and everybody won't stop complaining about him, even though he's completely benign :D

It's a great feeling that doing sidequests is completely justified this time. In this game, it's literally my job to fly around and ensure random strangers' wellbeing! Oh look, someone on Reddit made a post appreciating this too.

"Your father is my problem. He's everyone's problem. We're all paying for Alec Ryder's ego. He preyed on Jien Garson's trusting nature and bulldozed us to this godforsaken place" !!! More evidence!! (Random angry woman on the Hyperion)

This is a great way to introduce flashbacks! And to reveal information gradually.

SAM is basically the third Ryder child, huh.

The camera angle and lighting in SAM's room is one of the most flattering in the game.

I'm glad we're actually giving spotlight to the transhumanism theme, unlike with Shepard...

Or maybe SAM is Ellen's reincarnation somehow? It's clear Alec somehow intended to save her with it, but how? I'm genuinely enjoying this mystery. Alec sure has a lot of character and presence, especially for a character with so little actual screentime... You can see his shadow over the entire story.

There's some nice animation at Scott's bedside!

"Is dad okay?" Shit. Shit. Now that's a choice...

(I mean, what she's saying will turn out to be true, hopefully...)

I didn't lie about Habitat 7, though. That's not as important.

Holy crap, that was an emotional scene.

I like Garson's Super Ethical VI Interview.

Professor Gerik in the lab on Nexus has a letter about us being invasive species and preserving local biodiversity! That's nice. (But on the other hand, we'd endanger it just as much if the Scourge hadn't done it first.)

Female Salarians look like male Salarians and sound like female humans. I should just learn to live with the fact that there'll be no real Salarian voices in this galaxy... Ugh.

Ahh Drack is visiting Kesh!!

Have I mentioned how fond I am of our new council/advisors? Kandros is a bit bland, but the other three are great.

30 minutes after I said that SAM is like another sibling to Ryder, he got infected with a virus. Give this family a break!

Of course the hackers were wrong etc, but the things hacked!Avina says are still absolutely correct...

BTW I chose to unfreeze merchants first -- to get the bigger inventory. Ugh, the lack of inventory was one of my favourite things about ME2 and ME3...

I had to read a walkthrough for "Station Sabotage"...

I like the design of Zara's face.

The Nexus sidequests are all about intrigue and investigation! Just like the main one about Alec, and the characters' backstories related to the uprising. Nice. I feel like a detective. It really gives the game a unique feel.

The saboteur has a good face too. And another sympathetic voice re: the uprising.

Tempest

Cora the gardener!

Damn, that speech about acceptance sure sounds like she's not talking about biotics... Why is she straight, Bioware?

Poor Cora. I can only continue to admire her ability to not hold grudges -- something that impressed me about her when Ryder became the Pathfinder.

It's so cute that the crew members have a group chat, have I mentioned? Really makes the ship look alive.

Vetra, Peebee, Gil and Liam are chatting like old friends! And the fact that they're playing poker reminds me of the Enterprise even more.

Eos

A timed mission to save colonists... with driving... I was so nervous!

FUCK I can't figure out this Fiend fight

I died like four times already what the fuck

Why can't I charge?! What do you mean "wrong target"?!

Also autosave glitches me through the floor every goddamn time!

Died about 8 times, I'm going to replace Peebee with Drack and turn down the difficulty

Oh thank fuck, this time it worked.

*can't find the evidence in the cave* *fast travel back to the start three or four times, get stuck on rocks*

Oh, here it is. Yeah, I enjoy playing detective, but I'd like less bugs!

I died and the game got stuck on reload

Alright, some sidequests are in the level 3 radiation zone which I don't know how to clear, and I can't find the bodies of the dead colonists. It got boring anyway. Back to the ship!

Tempest

Gil sends me an e-mail mentioning Jaal, whom I haven't even met...

Kallo's still arguing with Gil -- I'm pretty sure there's something going on he's not noticing... Nobody else has anything new to say. Let's advance the plot, then.

New solar system/Tempest/Nexus

Whoa, I didn't expect things to get so intense immediately!

Sooo, are you going to explain how the angara got the translators working within several minutes?

Are you trying to tell me the kett and the angara aren't related, despite having exactly the same faces?

Jaal's cape flapping is mesmerizing.

I don't understand, why is everyone being so weird and unprofessional?? Instead of opening normal diplomatic talks, they stand in a circle and say shit about Jaal in his presence. Why the hell are they being so entitled? If the angara help us, of course we need to offer something in return.

Liam, what movie night?! We're kind of busy!

Well, at least Jaal isn't going to let me exhaust all conversation topics in one go! :D

"I LIVE IN AN ESCAPE POD" :D

Stop! Prompting! Me! To! Flirt! With! Gil! Two different times in the same conversation -- what??

Okay, by this point I'm pretty sure that the poker mentions are not just a coincidence but a deliberate reference to TNG. 

When will I have enough materials for an asari sword? Maybe a quick trip to the Nexus will help. *immediately gets buried under sidequests*

What, you don't have laws for attempted murder? That has never happened in the entire history of Milky Way? Bioware sure likes to create a complex situation then make you decide between two extremes. I let the turian stay, but I'm not impressed.

What, and they didn't even tell the public what really happened? Ugh.

Pacified the protesters successfully.

Was prepared to go and realized I forgot one sidequest on the Nexus, went back... I need to stop doing this! It's ruining all momentum.

Havarl (not sure about the spelling)

Main plot again, here we go!

Oops, clicked on the wrong button and now my team still has Vetra instead of Peebee.

Nice scenery.

Okay, it's stupid to leave the planet just to swap squadmates, but it's even stupider to explore this planet without Peebee.

Oh right, there is a spot here for a forward station. (Don't the angara mind?)

There's an entire alien jungle, and nothing is scannable? Really?

@myself stop fucking dying... how am I supposed to fight enemies I don't see without any reasonable cover...

Oh, right, this is normal water, not the Deadly Electric Water. That's a relief, at least.

Oh look, normal cover, I can use my ranged powers like an adept/sentinel I intended to be instead of novaguarding.

Spent like half an hour trying to find a way towards the forward station mark on the east, gave up. This Pathfinder isn't very good at finding paths...

Let's find the gay turian Pathfinder!

What am I going to do with all this nickel? These aren't the materials I'm looking for, Bioware

And finally, after exploring everything else -- the Monolith!

This happened again: the profiles refuse to switch mid-fight. WTF???

"Follow the Remnant river?" You mean, what I've done an hour before? I sure hope the Remnant didn't respawn...

So the Remnant are Order and the Scourge is Chaos? I see we've arrived to witness an existential struggle of cosmic forces...

Why are my companions so useless during exploration? They don't give advice, they don't even have banter like in DA.

Oh GREAT, a jumping puzzle, and in the dark too.

I must say, the design is really beautiful, they nailed the intersection of "Alien", "Ancient" and "Powerful" here. Though I'm salty because it's just a sci-fi variation of the ancient elven design from DAI, which means DA4 won't be able to use it probably.

Nice view! @people with powerful PCs, please photograph these things for the rest of us!

Novaguarding+shotgun (only a Katana!) is so powerful I don't feel the need to do anything else...

We're nearly at the top and there's a health pack. I better save...

The plot thickens!

Oh. Is THIS the forward station I've been looking for? No wonder I didn't find it lmao. They should have just covered it in fog...

Why are shields so much harder to take down than armor? Ugh, that boss. At least on the second try I managed to kite him...

Yes, I climbed the column. Whatever. I got some Vanadium! Finally, I need it for my asari sword.

Oh, okay, THIS is the forward station from above. OK.

One of the enemies I had to defeat in a camp got stuck somewhere and I had to run around for 10 minutes before I found him, except I didn't even see him and he apparently died when I approached, but idk how it happened.

I met the reincarnated dude. And that's enough for today.

[keita52]

Spectre Requisitions Rare Pair Letter 2017

I hope there’s something in here that sparks your imagination! I’m okay with everything from platonic friendship/fluff to PWP - whatever you’re best at or speaks to you the most. I’d rather have something that you found enjoyable and fun to write than be overly restrictive with my preferences.

If you find you have questions or want clarification, you can drop an anonymous ask/response and I’ll be happy to answer you :)

Likes, dislikes, DNWs, specific prompts below the cut.

DNWs/Squicks:

Watersports/Scat

Humiliation

Excessive fluids

Infidelity/cheating

Daddy/mommy kink

Non-con

General Likes:

Awkward first dates, meet the family

Humor and friendship, especially female friendship

Mutual UST/pining that leads to friends using clue by fours to get them together, already

Relationship evolution. Getting together for the first time through becoming serious.

Sexual tension bubbling over into their first time together

Safe, sane, consensual BDSM- perhaps in the context of an established couple trying something new

Kink negotiation

Alternate history/“what if” AUs

Custom Shepard/Ryder

Supportive, strong relationships. Being there for each other. Treating each other as equal partners.

Domestic/family fluff.

General Dislikes:

Rimming

A/B/O dynamics

Coffee shop or modern (e.g. 2017-ish) AUs

Incest

Gore (Excessive depiction… canon-typical violence is perfectly fine)

Mpreg

Aria T’Loak/Urdnot Wrex

Let’s get this out of the way: Aria = Aleena. Got it? Okay. Tell me about that epic fight that Wrex relates in ME1, the one that took days and spanned an entire space station. Give me Aria/Aleena’s POV afterwards as she fakes her own death but can’t resist letting Wrex know, later, that she’s still alive. If you want to go even earlier than that, how did they first meet? How did their relationship evolve over time?

Or maybe Aria seeks Wrex out in ME3, either before or after taking back Omega. Does he recognize her, or did she go to lengths to change her appearance? An AU where Wrex helps her instead of Shepard could be a lot of fun. If you go that route, don’t ignore Nyreen and Aria’s relationship, and don’t have Wrex react in an un-Wrex like manner (e.g. be jealous of Nyreen).

Female Shepard/Tali’Zorah nar Rayya

Anything, anything, anything! Happy ending on Rannoch after ME3. Angst over one or the other’s death during ME3. FemShep standing up for her girl during Tali’s loyalty mission. Tali being afraid to make a move because she doesn’t think FemShep is interested, and FemShep proving her very wrong. Hurt/comfort. Just these two being there for one another and being very much in love. 

Kal’Reegar/Tali’Zorah nar Rayya

All the romantic fluff! The mission on Haestrom and how it went badly -- maybe something from Kal’s POV where he realizes he’s falling for her. A private reunion on the Rayya during Tali’s trial, where he confesses his feelings and she reciprocates (or maybe she confesses first? Either way is good!). Kal lives after ME3 and they become respected leaders on Rannoch. Geth babysitting their kids?? Another instance where I’ll take almost anything!

Kirrahe/Mordin Solus

For this one, you can either go strictly platonic or tweak canon to make their relationship include sex. Working together during their STG days -- butting heads and then eventually coming to respect each other. Maybe they keep in touch afterwards, steal moments together whenever they can. A reunion during ME3, after Sur’Kesh -- maybe Kirrahe comes on the Normandy for a time and sees Mordin there. They bury whatever hatchets lay between them because the Reapers make everything uncertain. Maybe that’s their first time together? Mordin lives or dies during ME3, your choice.

Legion/Female Shepard

Please use “it” pronouns for Legion, since I don’t see it having a strong gender identity. I know that the use of “he” in ME3 is supposed to show that Tali and Shepard accept Legion as a person, but in my mind there are other ways to do that. 

On that theme: FemShep does see Legion as a person, and that definitely means something to the geth. I’d love it if you wrote from Legion’s POV as it struggles to comprehend these things called feelings. Legion starts doing little things for Shepard, and then eventually offers itself for stress relief. Of a sexual nature. I’m ok with Shep being hesitant at first before coming around to the idea. Or keep it non-sexual and just show the friendship and trust between them.

Nyreen Kandros/Aria T’Loak

Another case of “anything”! How they got together, and how they broke up (all the angst, delicious angst). Aria’s reaction to Nyreen’s death. Or Nyreen lives and they finally get back together for good. Some possessive!Aria would be great in that scenario. Perfectly ok to address Nyreen’s fears of being swallowed up by Aria, as long as it doesn’t actually happen.

Nakmor Drack/Lexi T’Perro

Drack decides he doesn’t mind the hot asari doctor flirting with him, and eventually taking him to bed. He’s learned to take his pleasures where he can, after all. I’d love to see something that starts as casual and becomes more serious eventually. Kesh is thrilled to turn the tables on Drack, after his reaction to Vorn, and teases him mercilessly. Drack having to deal with Kesh’s kids and his own asari offspring at the same time. 

Nakmor Drack/Urdnot Wrex

Cranky old krogans unite! Both of them have Seen Some Shit. They get smashed together before Clan Nakmor leaves with the Initiative, trade stories, try to top one another as far as who did the most outrageous thing. Or maybe they fought/worked together at one point. Drack gives Wrex a hand in the 2183-2185 period as Wrex works to unite the clans.

Avela Kjar/Jaal Ama Darav

You get to hear gossip on Aya about Jaal’s relationship status (mainly, the lack thereof). I’m a sucker for secret relationship/arranged marriage tropes. Maybe there’s arranged marriage traditions among angara, and Jaal is fed up with his mothers’ attempts to set him up with a “nice young woman” so he chooses Avela instead, because she’s attached to her work and is also feeling the pressure of being matched up. Nice, uncomplicated, no feelings … until feelings start to creep in. 

Or the more straightforward approach: Jaal gets to know Avela because of Ryder’s visits to the Repository of History, and (once again) feelings ensue.

Jaal Ama Darav/Liam Kosta/Female Ryder

So many great ways this could go! Duo to triad (any duo to start with), or the guys have been rivals for FemRyder’s attention and decide they’re okay with sharing. Shameless three-way smut, or Jaal bringing both of them home to his mothers.

[shadeof-sage]

I gotta do this. Nobody cares but I gotta do it

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? • "well, I didn't see this coming. Did you?" 2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? • we don't really talk anymore. I don't really know what happened, but I wish our friendship wasn't ruined. 3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? • I'm down for them to be into anything except for meth 4. Is your last name longer than six letters? • nope. 5 5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? • drunk cause New Year's Eve, baby 6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? •ohhh yeah. it's already happened twice this year 7. What does your last received text say? • "psst" 8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? • I can't remember an exact number but it was multiple times 9. Where was your last kiss at? • in my friends front yard 10. When is the last time you saw your sister? • last night when I got home 11. What do you drink in the morning? • tea, water, oj, and beer on a good day 12. Where did you sleep last night? • my bedaroo 13. Do you think relationships are hard? • they can be if the other person doesn't give equal effort 14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? • ohh yeah, the list is too long to type lol 15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? • nah. we'd most likely start talking about what happened with us. at least I'd hope that would be what happened. it could also just be silent. or, we'd get drunk and then talk about shit. lol 16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? • raining while it's sunny!! 17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? • surprisingly, no. it's such a common middle name 18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? • boxer briefs that I stole from someone. they're comfy as hell 19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? • who knows 20. Does anyone like you? • I'd like to think so 21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? • no, I don't think so 22. Is the last person you kissed gay? • haha no. that would be a plot twist 23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? • Donald Trump 24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? • I plan on getting my whole body tatted 25. In the past week have you cried? • yes, in the shower 26. What breed was the last dog you saw? • a gorgeous German Shepard 27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? • in the shower 28. Have you ever kissed a football player? • 3. unfortunately. those lil fuckboys 29. Do you think you’re old? • my soul is old, but my body isn't 30. Do you like text messaging? •if I wasn't so shy, I'd definitely want to talk on the phone more. text messaging is a good safe zone 31. What type of day are you having? • I just woke up, I don't know yet 32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? • it's been pierced 3 times. it never works out, although I do want to try it again someday 33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? • fucking warm as hell, r u kidding me 34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? •hell yeah, multiple people 35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? • depends. some people are relationship worthy and some people are better as flings 36. Are you a simple or complicated person? • I'd like to think I'm a simple person, but I'm not 37. What song are you listening to? • palemote. it's from my sleep playlist 38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? • wholeheartedly. That's why i don't say it very often 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? • yeppers 40. What made you start liking the person you like now? • I don't really like anyone right now. 41. When did you last receive a text message? • 4 minutes ago 42. What is wrong with you right now? • haha, don't get me started 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? • she works with me and I've never seen her out of work, so not much 44. Does anyone disgust you? • Donald fucking trump 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? • depends who they were and if we have a connection 46. Are you in a good mood right now? • neutral 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? • my sister 48. What color shirt are you wearing? • a darkish blue 49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? • yeah. this guy asked me on a date to the movies and it made me cringe a lil bit and I don't know how to get out of it 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? • nope. I don't give up on people. unless they want me out of their life completely 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? • no. I'm still in love with him actually. I can't really move on because I haven't had the closer that I need 52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? • you have no idea 53. Do you like rain? • I crave it 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? • nah, we'll having drinking competitions 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? • haha yep. but I didn't tell them because I was too afraid that I was going to get hurt 56. Do you like to cuddle? • I love it, I just can't fall asleep when cuddled 57. Are you shy? • depends on who the person is. I try not to be 58. Do you get along with girls? • yessss, all da girls are my friendz 59. Have you dated the person you texted last? • no, and I don't want to 60. What do you carry with you at all times? • haha, this one will be funny. i carry my wallet, 4 lighters, weed, a pipe, rolling papers, makeup bag, 2 chapsticks, something minty, eye drops, naproxen sodium (for nasty ass migraines), a flashlight, phone charger, a water bottle and an old spice container I put tequila in sometimes so I can have a little somethin somethin during the day 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? • GHOSTS! :D :D :D 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? • I've never even had a relationship in general, but I'd hope so lol 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? • nah, single as the pringles I was eatin 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? • yes, I'd cry a little bit on the inside 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? • probably. can't remember anything too special though 66. How old are the last three people you kissed? • hahaha. 21, 20, and 28 67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? • pay to get them done, I need those nice ass acrylics 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? • sheer print. heh. 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? • if I had a car, I'd have a shit load of stickers 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? • Luke Bryan makes me want to claw my ears off, so lil Wayne it is 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? • iPhone. Always. 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? • ew. 73. Do you like diet soda? • I don't like soda in general. except for sprite when my tummy hurts. 74. What color are the walls in your room? • boring and white 75. Are you 16 or older? • turned 18 a month ago, boyyyy 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? • I used to, now I think it's been carried out for too long so it bores me. 77. Do you have a job? • I got 2 78. What are your initials? • S.A.B. 79. Did you ever have braces? • yes, and I might need them again because my teeth hate me 80. Are you from the south? • nahh, Texans are hot as fuck though 81. What does your last status on facebook say? • it's a picture of the curly haired kid from Stranger Things pointing to a number on the wall that says "11" and the text above it says " on a scale of 1 to 10, how stressed out are you?" 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? • noooo, I don't even think he's alive. sadly 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? • I was closer to my mom. Lately, I've been feeling like I'm drifting away from both of them. 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? • I did gymnastics for 3 years when I was little 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? • split 86. Do you smoke? • not cigarettes but hella weed 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? • depends on the occasion because I look good in both 88. Is your phone touch screen? • nah, this iPhone is from 1999. it has a keyboard hooked into it 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? • since its growing out right now, the only way it looks good is if it's curly 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? • too many times to count 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? • all of the above 92. Have you ever made out in a car? • yes 93. …Had sex in a car? • nah, but I've given sloppy dick kisses multiple times in a car 94. Are you single or in a relationship? • been single since 1999 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? • fast the fuck asleep 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? • New Year's Eve 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? • it's not the bestest of the best. but it does its job 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? • yep. it never ends well and I end up losing that friend :( 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? • ugh. yes. I hate it 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? • no. they're probably blocked 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? • yeah, when I was 14. not good. I know 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: • sleazy. my go to song when I was 13. lmao 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? • yesssss and imma get more today 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? • I'd wear heels or doc martens with shorts. word.

[incorrectly-quoted-queers]

Drunk Punch Love: INTERMISSION ARCHANGEL

Pairing: FemShep and Garrus Vakarian (Shakarian)

Rating: PG-13 (with some tossed F-bombs)

Summary: Their awkward, badass journey through saving the galaxy and accidentally falling in love

INTERMISSION ARCHANGEL: The End.

Shepard had been dead 232 days.

Garrus had been going over their new security measures when the apartment's front door pinged. It wasn't a sound he heard often, since all the crew had their own codes to the back door. But the Via siblings were new, and Butler's wife did sometimes stop by, so he figured it was just one of them.

What he didn't expect was a female turian with blue markings to have her arms crossed, looking at him like he just committed a crime. Before he could react, the glare faded and she smiled at him. Garrus' head still wasn't fully straight when she pulled him into her arms.

It only clicked together that this wasn't some damn fever dream when she started talking. "Happy birthday, baby brother!"

Oh. It was that day.

"I'd ask if I surprised you, but I already know I did." The second he shut his door behind him, closing off his vigilante world from his family, that damned brain of hers caught on and she peered at him. "I know you wouldn't have anything planned for your birthday, so what are you hiding?"

If it was his father, he could lie and say a woman and the man would happily walk away from the shut door, uninterested. But Solana was a different beast. She was curious, intrusive, and interested in damn near anything. It would be hard to keep her out of his apartment, lined with guns, gear, and a krogan casing the joint.

Also, she definitely would give him shit for his undecorated bedroom and that was a blast from the past he never wanted to deal with again.

So, his best shot was to go truth adjacent. "There was a break-in on my block. I have a consultant in there retrofitting my place with more security."

"You caring about your own well-being and safety is... new, but I won't complain." Solana snorted and shook her head at him, in her normal well-meaning but condescending way. "Only you would schedule a security consultation on your birthday. Were you going to do anything at all?"

Garrus leaned against his door and tried not to look too pissed off, because Solana knew the answer to that and was really just trying to push his buttons. Sure, that would be a stretch for anyone else, but his big sister? He knew how she operated. Probe for intel and then use that intel to make whatever point she was making infallible. He stuck with, "You know the answer to that."

"Doesn't the fact I know the answer to that speak volumes to the issue at hand?" Dammit. And he thought he said something neutral. Before he could spike back, she added, "It's been three years, Garrus, you're not dancing on mother's grave just because you dare to enjoy your birthday."

Now that one was a funny answer. "Really Sol? That's easy for you to say when she didn't die on yours."

"I've never liked the guilt games you and father play. Just yesterday he was messaging me about how it's his fault you react poorly to death and rebel. But do either of you do anything with that guilt? Because that's progress I'd like to see." Garrus almost laughed, because the one thing close to progress was also the one thing he really didn't want her to see. "Life happens. Death happens. Now, if I remember correctly, I begged for a sibling. So if not for yourself, let's celebrate the happiest day of my four year old life, meeting my little brother."

He wanted to stay mad and indignant, maybe even scare her off. But dammit, he cared too much about Solana for that. Groaning, he pushed off the door and conceded. "Fine, let's go get some food and see a flick or something. You did come all this way to see me."

"You're right, I did, so thank you for appreciating it." She walked forward first and he took the opportunity to cover his tracks. With a flick of his wrist he typed out a quick message to Jawth and Sidonis, asking them to hide the guns and clean up the place before he got back; that his sister came for a surprise visit.

They agreed without asking a single question. Which was good, because he'd rather off himself than tell those assholes what day it was.

Now the real landmine was keeping Solana from looking too deeply into the Archangel rumors. If that caught her interest, he was sure she could figure it out. He didn't expect her to snitch to their father, who would objectively hate what he was doing, but he also didn't know how she'd react.

Garrus just wanted his sister to remain his annoying, inordinately supportive sister. He didn't want that to get complicated.

Somehow, he managed to dodge all Archangel talk the entire time. His most impressive save was pretending to choke on something to be louder than and scare off a guy at the cafe who wouldn't stop talking about his crew and their latest hit. Solana definitely didn't need to hear about "That blue-ass sniper turian."

That was more than enough to get her curious.

When they got to his apartment door, he almost breathed a sigh of relief. They'd made it, all the way back to his place, and she still didn't know. She could spend the night here and then he could send her back off to her life on Palaven, no harm no foul.

But for all his attempts, he'd forgotten one small, terrible little factor.

Sidonis knew who he was, and that man had a lot of contacts.

The second the metal panels slid open, every single one of his team was there, grinning like mad, with a garrish looking cake stuffed with candles. And right in front of his sister, the fuckers yelled, "Happy birthday, Archangel."

There were a lot of times with Shepard he wished to kill a man, but this time, he wanted to kill nine.

Solana just glared at him with a knowing smirk. "I fucking knew you were hiding something!"

Garrus grabbed her arm and took her outside, where all his idiot team wasn't watching. He started talking, fast. "Sol, I-"

"If you say you're sorry, I'll know you're lying." She shook her head. "So you're the infamous merc-killer? Honestly, I should've known. It was probably just wishful thinking." He was too overwhelmed to know what to say to that, but luckily Sol was happy to fill in the blanks. "I won't tell father. He would hate you for doing this. Just don't keep secrets from me, okay? I love you."

"I can give you that."

"Good. Now, why don't we enjoy your party that your team set up?" Before she walked through the door, she squeezed his arm and frowned. A classic Sol look of distaste; last time he saw it, it was when a co-worker of hers tried to ask her on a date because "she had to say yes to someone eventually". If Solana was less composed, he was sure she would've punched him. "I'm not eating that cake, though."

"Don't worry. I would have told you not to."

/

Shepard had been dead 365 days.

All he could see were her eyes. Soft green, always laughing at something. Until she wasn't. But wherever things were good, she was laughing, and hard. Garrus couldn't quite get his head straight, but he hoped he said something funny. More than likely, what actually happened was that he did something awkward and dumb, but that was almost just as good.

When he started scanning the room, he realized they were by one of the observation windows on the Normandy. Despite all the chaos in their lives, they'd taken a moment to look at the stars. He always liked it here. Why'd he never bring her here?

Even when she stopped laughing, she kept smiling. Like she always did after a long day, she pulled her hair out of that tight bun thing and kept on shaking it with her fingers. Sometimes he wondered what it felt like, and not like when he accidently touched it during movie night. Like how she was doing, hands all in.

But it was safe to say that was a bit more than a CO and an ex C-sec officer should be doing.

He wasn't quite sure what he was saying, or why he was saying it, but he told her, "When I look at the stars, I think of you." Garrus wasn't really sure when he got all bold. Maybe it was this haziness he was feeling.

Shepard raised one of her hairy eyebrows at him. "We live in space. On a spaceship. We see stars almost constantly."

Garrus took a step closer to her, sometimes wondering how she got anywhere with how oblivious she could be. And god knows he normally wasn't this smooth but this time, right here, he said what he wanted to. "Exactly my point."

Blinking, it took her a few seconds to register what he said, and she even turned to look up at him. But when their eyes did meet? Hers softened like for once, she finally got it. Her cheeks even did that little blush thing when she was embarrassed. "Oh."

With that look, was like all of his normal discomfort came rushing back, all those feelings that always told him not to say stupid shit like that. He shouldn't have said that, right? All those things she said she felt were byproducts of a lonely, drunk night where he got too close and she was alone enough to get stuck on it. She didn't like it, she couldn't, and it was weird, he was ruining the whole friendship thing... "Shepard, forget I said that-"

But then, she did that human thing they always saw in movies. She got on her toes and pressed her lips against his. It was weird, soft skin against his plates, but it was her skin, and that was what mattered.

Maybe he hadn't ruined everything.

Shepard said, "I won't forget-"

Everything seemed so right, but just then the wall blew open and Shepard was being sucked out into space. Again. He tried to grab onto her arms, legs, anything to keep her there. No matter what he reached for, she slipped through his goddamn fingers.

When he woke up, his body was shaking and he wrapped his arms around his legs. He hated to admit this wasn't the first time he had a dream like that, one where Shepard wasn't gone.

Garrus had tried so hard to keep her at bay. One year later, but she was always still there.

As long as he could help it, though, his nightmares would be the only place she had left to live. Elsewhere, he had work to do. And as much as he felt for her, pined for her, his life didn't have place for stubborn, Russian spectres.

Garrus had a station to protect.

/

Shepard had been dead for 728 days.

He never should've left the apartment. Garrus figured his team could cover the last of the security measures while he helped Sidonis. It should've been easy.

But when he got there, Sidonis never showed up. And when he got back, there was blood everywhere.

He trusted Sidonis, from the first day he met him. The damned turian seemed honest about wanting to save people. But here they were, and Lantar fucked them.

They were all going to die here, weren't they?

Most everyone was down already. Their corpses were strewn all over the place, their faces locked in horror or dull emptiness. The only ones left alive were Ryel, Gibbon, and Butler.

But from the looks of it, Butler didn't have much longer.

He yelled at the crippled leftovers of his team and asked, "How's it looking?"

Gibbon answered, "Understandably terrible. We have a vantage point, but they have many waves of mercs."

Ryel added, "This balcony view is not as pretty with bullets and brains flying everywhere."

Before he could respond, Butler grabbed Garrus' arm. His abdomen was covered in blood and he could see his stomach lining. The guy normally wore gray pants, but they looked like they'd been dyed red. "I'm not gonna make it, huh?"

"Butler-"

"Nah, I know." He coughed. Garrus couldn't lie to him. "As much as I'd like to go screaming out Nalah's name, I want to hear about something that doesn't break my heart. Tell me about your Russian girl, Garrus. And for real this time."

For all the times Garrus shoved her away, maybe Butler was right. If he was going to die, he'd rather hear about her one last time. He said to the other two, "Hold the line and be careful."

Then, he sat down next to Butler and held his hand. After all this time, nearly two years, he just started talking about Shepard like she really was. "Her name was Anya. She was competitive to a fault and loved saying quotes while she watched movies. She loved to dance, but just by herself. She was a brave leader, but what mattered more was that she was... She was a beautiful, squishy human."

"A human? Never woulda guessed." He knew he already told Butler she was human, but it wasn't really the time to contradict him. Blood loss never helped make the brain a stronger machine.

Instead, Garrus just kept talking, his grip on Butler's hand getting tighter as the memories and feelings wound around his chest. "Me neither, but from all your stories, you didn't sound like you expected to fall in love with an Asari either."

"You're right. I didn't. Tell me more?"

"She was a classic soldier, until she wasn't. An infiltrator class, great with a pistol, terrifying, even. But sometimes she'd walk into debriefings with sweatpants and her hair a mess, swearing about something the pilot did to her toothpaste. And I wondered how that person was the same one that inspired a whole ship, every day. But she did."

"And?" Butler looked at him knowingly, deliberately.

Today, Garrus let the dying man win. "And you were right, Butler. I loved her."

With one final smirk, his hand fell.

When Butler stopped breathing, Garrus picked up his gun, got behind cover like Ryel and Gibbon, and started shooting.

If he was going to go down, he was gonna go down fighting. And this time, he wouldn't stop thinking about her. This time, if he was gonna die, she'd be the last thing on his mind.

No matter where he went, he was stuck with her. Forever.

///

After a little interlude into Garrus' two years without Shepard, we can finally start getting Anya awake and moving in his direction. I am SO ready.

I read on tumblr a couple weeks ago that apparently a lot of people write their own version of 4 things: their first meeting, the rocket-to-the-face, the night before the suicide mission, and "this is the best spot on the citadel.

I know it's stupid, but I honestly feel kinda proud that I ignored their first meeting entirely. And also that my suicide mission night will be VERY different. Is it a stupid thing to be proud of? Yes, but at my core I'm kinda a trash hipster and I can feel pride and shame in that.

Anyway, thank you so much for reading! And extra thanks to my lovely patrons:

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