#hbs week 4

[buckybarnesevents]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Captain America - All Media Types Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Steve Rogers, Nick Fury, Phil Coulson, Sam Wilson (Marvel) Additional Tags: Enemies to Lovers, Sort Of, Frenemies, Unresolved Sexual Tension, that gets very resolved, but creates more problems, Alternate Universe, Mafia AU, Mob Boss Steve Rogers, Mob Boss Bucky Barnes, mentions of drugs but no drug usage, Bottom Steve Rogers, Top Bucky Barnes, Implied Switching, Edging, Semi-Public Sex, unconventional uses for olive oil, Unsafe Sex, Rough Sex, Steve has a secret humiliation kink he didn't know about before this, Art Series: Part 33 of Bingo Fills Summary:

Steve Rogers is the head of the Irish mob. James “Lucky Bucky” Barnes heads the Romanian mob. They barely tolerate each other on the best days. But when a rising threat from the Sicilians forces them to have to work together, nobody could have foreseen the outcome. They come out of their secret meeting with a new alliance—maybe something more, if they’re willing to take what they want.

[late-to-the-party-81]

😚😚

Loving you means loving myself - Epilogue

AN: Here is a little spicy ending for the story, as requested by my lovely cheer-leader @cable-knit-sweater. Thank you again to @linnadhiell for beta-ing and to @buckybarnesevents for organising.

Week 4 of Hot Bucky Summer is a Free Week, with the optional prompt of the letter 'C'. I went with cockwarming with our soft, sweet boys. Enjoy

Mood board by me and dividers by @firefly-graphics

Masterlist | Hot Bucky Summer Masterlist | Chapter 3

Summary: Steve decides to spend the day working from home...

Relationship: Beefy Bucky x Small Steve

Word Count: 1.5k

CW: Indulgent fluff, cockwarming, subspace, light D/S tones, Daddy kink, everything is soft and nothing hurts, after care.

Steve’s fingers ran over the keyboard of his laptop, the soft tap-tapping as the keys depressed the only sound in the room other than his breathing… and Bucky’s breathing. 

Every so often his hand dropped down from his desk, dipping underneath it, between his legs, to run his fingers through Bucky’s hair. In response, Bucky let out a low, sleepy moan.

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed since he’d got down on his knees, resting on his cushion, under Steve’s desk. Was it 10 minutes or 4 hours since he’d stroked Steve to hardness and then taken his cock into his mouth, resting his cheek on Steve’s thigh.

It had only been a few weeks since Steve had suggested this - Bucky spending the day cockwarming him - and Bucky hadn’t been able to get the idea out of his head. Which meant that when Steve mentioned he had a home working day coming up, Bucky had immediately called his boss to book a day of annual leave. Steve had smiled, cupping Bucky’s face and calling him a sweet, needy boy. Bucky couldn’t deny that fact one iota.

Due to neither of them having to get up to commute into the office, they’d woken up with the sun, as opposed to the blare of the alarm. Or rather Steve had woken up with the sun. Bucky was woken up by the feeling of Steve swallowing down his cock and rubbing at his hole, sucking and fingering him into a lazy morning orgasm.

After breakfast Steve had his shower, before heading to their home office to get set up for the day. Bucky had his shower then, dressing afterwards in soft comfortable clothes and then going to join his boyfriend. Steve had already sat down at his desk, and was talking on a video conference. For a few minutes, Bucky just watched him - watched Steve talk confidently about marketing plans and focus groups, feeling a sense of pride in his chest that this man was his partner, his dom. 

Then Steve had held his arm out, away from the camera, and beckoned Bucky over with a wave. Bucky had known what was required of him - they’d already discussed it. He dropped to his knees and crawled across the carpet and under the front side of the desk. 

While Steve was dressed professionally for his meeting, it was only from the waist up, with a smart pale blue button up and a darker blue tie. However, under the desk was a different story. He was naked, cock semi-hard, his feet either side of Bucky’s kneeling cushion.

Bucky had taken up position, nuzzling into Steve’s crotch, not wanting to go too far while Steve was talking to his work colleagues, but then Steve had reached down, taken Bucky’s hand and guided it to his own cock, blatant permission to start his task. Bucky didn’t need telling twice.

He’d taken back his hand briefly, licking his palm to help with the glide and started to slowly jerk Steve’s cock, slow and firm, the way he knew Steve liked it. Bucky had peek up at Steve, observing him as he’d continued his call, but aside from a tightening of his own fingers into the meat of his thigh, Steve didn’t give any indication that he was anything other than 100% focused on the conversation with the rest of the marketing team.

Happy to be led by what Steve wanted, Bucky had continued to stroke him, until fingers had curled into his hair and moved his head towards Steve’s aching hardness. Bucky had licked his lips, making sure they were fully wet before stretching them around the weeping, flushed cock in front of him.

God, he loved this. The musky scent of Steve, the weight of him. It didn’t take a lot to get Bucky into that soft, fuzzy head space, especially, when he rested his head on Steve’s leg as his hair was petted. Every so often he shifted slightly, wiggling his toes and his fingers to keep his blood moving, but it was mostly sub-conscious, because his head was empty of everything except Steve.

The video call ended, which is when the soft tapping of the keyboard and even quieter clicking of the mouse began. Everyso often these sounds were punctuated with the light scratching of pencil across paper as Steve made himself a note about something he was reading or writing about. Less often still was Steve’s breathy exclamations as he read something that frustrated him.

Eventually though, Steve roused him, petting him firmer and talking directly to him to bring him up out of his headspace a bit. 

“Time for a comfort and food break, baby.”

Bucky gurned for a few moments, stretching out his face muscles before answering, his voice raspy from the relaxation.

“Yes, Daddy.” 

Bucky rose wobbly to his feet, and Steve picked up his cushion and took his hand. He walked Bucky down to the bathroom, letting him have privacy to freshen up, before leading him to the living room and settling Bucky back on his cushion next to the sofa.

“Wait here, sweetheart. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Bucky just smiled and nodded before closing his eyes and leaning his head against the arm of the sofa. 

Steve was as good as his word, returning after his own comfort break and a trip to the kitchen. He was still naked from the waist down, but when he sat on the sofa and guided Bucky’s head towards his lower half, it was for Bucky to just rest his head. 

Steve turned on the TV, to the news channel, and watched the updates whilst eating his lunch, handmade pastrami on rye. Every few bites he picked a bit of food from his place and placed it between Bucky’s lips. Wafer thin pieces of pepper crusted cured beef, cubes of nutty emmental cheese and slices of briny, sweet sandwich pickles. Bucky’s head was still nice and fuzzy as he enjoyed floating on the edges of subspace, with the only thinking he had to do was opening his mouth when food brushed his lips, then chew and swallow it. Steve also offered water from a glass with a straw, and Bucky hadn’t realised how thirsty he was until Steve cautioned him to slow down when he almost drank all of the liquid in one go.

When lunch was over, it was time for another bathroom break, before returning to the office. With Bucky being so floaty Steve brought himself back to full hardness with a few deft strokes before gently directing Bucky back to his task. Bucky let out a small whimper, lapping at the end of Steve’s cock before swallowing him back down again and humming in satisfaction.

The afternoon passed similarly to the morning - some more typing, more writing and two more conference calls. Bucky sank deep into subspace gladly, enjoying having no pressing thoughts raising his anxiety levels. It was almost like sleeping - such a deep level of relaxation. 

When the end of Steve’s work day came, it was a surprise to Bucky. The time had passed so nebulously that he was a little confused, when Steve lifted his head up and pushed his chair back.

“Steeb?” The word slurred out of his mouth.

Steve cupped Bucky’s face in his hands as he knelt down on the carpet with him.

“Hey, baby. You’ve done so well. I’m so proud of you.”

The praise went straight to Bucky’s head and he whined, overwhelmed by it.

“Let’s get you to the bed for cuddles, okay?”

“‘Kay, Daddy.”

Holding onto Steve for support, Bucky shuffled down the hallway, almost falling onto the bed as soon as he got close enough. Steve cooed and ahhed, snuggling in next to him and pulling up the coverlet.  Bucky rested his head on Steve’s chest, grounding himself to the familiar sound of Steve’s heart beat. Steve stroked his hair and started to talk to him, interspersing compliments with mundane facts about the work he’d been doing all day, all the while helping Bucky swim upwards, against the tide of pleasant fog.

After a while he managed to open his eyes again, blinking sleepily up at Steve.

“Hi, Daddy.”

“You feeling more with me, baby?”

“Uh-huh. Still floaty, but I like it.”

Steve continued to comb his fingers through the curls at the front of Bucky’s head.

“I think I know something else you’ll like.”

Bucky smiled, knowing where Steve was going with this, but deciding to play along.

“What’s that, Daddy?”

“My cock deep inside you, sweetheart. That’s what.” Steve deftly rolled Bucky onto his back, and covered his lips with his own. All Bucky could think was “Best day ever!”

Tag list: @jobean12-blog @sidepartskinnyjeans @flordeamatista @krissy25 @bodeckersdiamonddoll @goldylions @luxeavenger @wheezy-stucky @doasyoudesireandlive @chemtrails-club @seitmai @peaches1958 @pono-pura-vida @writing-for-marvel

[hersweetrevenge]

the fact that frank literally works at a diner and yet still makes terrible coffee. he's so real.

[metanarrates]

I haven't seen a lot of coverage in the news about this, but my state has just advanced legislation on a bill that would criminalize trans bathroom use in publicly owned buildings. this could mean up to 6 months in jail and up to $1000 in fees for those convicted.

most alarming aspects of this bill:

-"publicly owned buildings" include airports, schools, libraries, government offices, some hospitals, and most terrifyingly AND explicitly within the bill, domestic violence shelters and rape crisis facilities. transgender people, who are estimated to be almost 4 times more likely to be victims of violent crimes than cisgender people, could become criminalized in the very spaces they seek out to shelter from abuse.

-on that note, the bill potentially threatens federal funding of already-underfunded domestic violence and sexual assault facilities. to recieve federal grants, facilities are required to follow nondiscrimination laws. this law could place the facilities in danger of losing the grants they rely on. this is severely going to impact victims' abilities to access critically needed services.

-the bill legally defines "sex" in a way that has a lot of potential impact across state legislature. according to the bill’s text, HB 257 would legally define a female as “an individual whose biological reproductive system is of the general type that functions in a way that could produce ova,” and a male as “an individual whose biological reproductive system is of the general type that functions to fertilize the ova of a female.” this could effectively end the state's legal recognition of trans people.

-the bill demands that trans people who DO use bathrooms in publicly owned buildings must have undergone both gender reassignment surgery and have had their birth certificate changed. this has several issues, obviously, but the biggest one I want to highlight is that this opens the door to potential genital inspection by law enforcement if someone is accused of being transgender in a bathroom. in addition to any other indignities suffered by being harassed by cops when trying to use the restroom, it is completely possible for law enforcement to now demand to see whether someone's genitals are in compliance with these laws. it's an unconscionable and humiliating invasion of privacy.

-the bill requires trans students to develop a "privacy plan" with their school in order to arrange access to unisex spaces. if unisex bathrooms are unavailable, the student can be granted access to a sex-designated space “through staggered scheduling or another policy provision that provides for temporary private access.”

-the bill allows the state’s attorney general to impose a fine of up to $10,000 per day on local governments that don’t enforce the bill. in essence, any government that isn't sufficiently committed to enforcing these draconian laws may face massive fines until they have reached the attorney general's standard of enforcement.

this is one of the most unbelievably severe anti-trans laws that have ever been proposed in the united states. it would effectively ban trans people from participating in public life, harm nearly every single victim of domestic violence and sexual assault who seeks services in the state, enforce criminality on random trans people in bathrooms, and open every single person who could be potentially accused of being trans up to a wave of harassment and discrimination from both private citizens and law enforcement. I'm not being hyperbolic when I say that this law would literally force me and my transfemme fiancee to flee this state.

the law's been fast tracked to an insane degree through the legislature. similarly to the anti-dei bill currently making its way through, it's only been a week since it was introduced, and it's already passed the house, and is now up for vote in the senate. if it passes both sets of votes, the only thing left in its way is the governor's decision to veto.

please share this post. make as much noise as you can. if you live in utah, please call and email your district senator as soon as possible. it doesn't matter how late you see this. the bill is up for vote this week (1/23/24 at the time of writing) and we need to do whatever we physically can to protest its passing. we've already moved past the opportunity for public comment on the bill, but a few organizations have called for a rally at the capitol steps on thursday (1/25/24) at noon. if you are in the salt lake area or are able to make it there, please consider attending. wear a mask and bring a sign. we are stronger together.

[buckets-and-trees]

Hot Bucky Summer 2024

My masterlist for @buckybarnesevents' Hot Bucky Summer 2024!

WEEK 1 - "Louder, let everyone hear you." - screaming/noisy sex, exhibitionism Falling Away - Alpha!Bucky x Female!Omega!Reader | part two of the Fine Line Collection

WEEK 2 - "What should I call you?" - alpha, pet Every Minute Of It - Alpha!Bucky x Female!Omega!Reader | part three of the Fine Line Collection

WEEK 3 - "Really? Here?!" - someone else's house Now That I Saw You - lawyer!Bucky x curvy!female assistant reader, sequel to What You Want

WEEK 4 - FREE WEEK - acarophilia Bound - demon!Bucky x female!reader | explicit smut, monster fucking

WEEK 5 - "We're..." - exes, enemies to lovers Big Conversation - canon!Bucky x Analyst!Female!Reader | part four of the Desperate to Devoted verse

WEEK 6 - "I won't be able to stop myself." Too Hot [700] Bucky x Female!Reader | light smut, part five in the Desperate to Devoted verse

WEEK 7 - "Put this on for me." - collars Little Lark [950] mean Mafia!Bucky x curvy!Millennial female!Reader x mean Mafia!Steve | non-con, non-explicit smut, character death

WEEK 8 - "Maybe this'll help you relax." - cockwarming Bird on a Wire [4.3k] mean Mafia!Bucky x curvy!Millennial female!Reader x mean Mafia!Steve | dub-con, explicit smut, sequel to Little Lark

WEEK 9 - FREE WEEK - WAM (wet & messy) Parking Lot Chem [6.7k] raunchy!Bucky x curvy!female!reader | explicit smut, hook up culture

WEEK 10 - "Shhhhhhh." - somnophilia Bird Home In The Darkness [2.7k] mean Mafia!Bucky x curvy!Millennial female!Reader x mean Mafia!Steve | dub-con, explicit smut, sequel to Bird on a Wire

WEEK 11 - "You look good like this." - tied down Feel [2.3k] Pleasure Dom!Bucky x curvy!female reader | smut, BDSM au, bondage, sequel to Talk (from HBS 2023!)

WEEK 12 - "What should I wear?" Poison Blood from the Wound of the Pricked Hand [3k] Post TFATWS!Bucky x curvy!Millennial Female!Reader | sultry but not smutty, MCU canon compliant

WEEK 13 - FREE WEEK Sweet and Slashy Summer Saturdays [3.6k] Bucky x curvy!female reader | smut, modern AU

[buckyismybicycle]

Chapter 2 is here!!!! Also sliding this into @buckybarnesevents Hot Bucky Summer, Week 4 ("Free Week")

so don’t go (wasting all our feelings)

Artist: @mxaether

Authors: @buckyismybicycle & @cable-knit-sweater

Character/Ship: Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes

Rating: Explicit

Major tags: Alternate Universe - Office, Top Bucky, Bottom Steve, (Light) Dom/sub , Age Difference, Big Dick Bucky Barnes, Come Eating, Exhibitionism, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Office Sex, Secret Relationship, Miscommunication, Jealousy, Light Angst

Summary:

He wonders how far he can push Steve, what this man’s limits are. Could Bucky finally have met his match? What if —  He has to snap out of it. This is a one-night stand, he’s never going to see this guy again. Better make the most of it.

Chapter 1: I think in the morning I’ll miss you

[herejusttosufferalong]

Due to all the activity, let’s recap . 1. We get the wonderful tour of L and N 2. 🦀 just so happens to surprise L at the New York premiere. Not one picture gets taken no one notices that she even there. 3. Tour happens we get all these wonderful moments. No sign of 🦀 in so many many places just our L and N. No pictures no DM articles no nothing. NOT even when round one of season 3 of Bridgerton drops do we get any type of gossip about either L or N. 4. Now London happens final premiere.. Premier was great lots of wonderful moments. Part two drops of the the biggest days of L and N careers this is viewed around the world 5. After party happens now we see L and 🦀. Time for celebrations of so many months of hard labor. Yet here come that paps taking pictures we see a smiling 🦀 and an angry L. Now hands get attempted to get held but L acting like a skeleton. DM sends the paps to L and 🦀 “someone” told them they should be watched. 6. DM post a story talking about alleged girlfriend of L. Full naming her and adds her IG handle. 7. fashion week happens we know L arrived alone.. went with Corey to an event alone. Yet here comes 🦀 out of no where. Gets pictures taken again and dropped to fans this time. 8. L goes to Paris and New York 🦀less all by his lonesome. 9. GQ event happens… we see more 🦀 and friends. 10. N is all of a sudden being linked to J cuz she went out. No proof (no kissing, no hugging) just a couple bars. Photographer from DM doesn’t even know who she is (by DM own words)

11. L goes to wedding and bar no 🦀 in sight. We all looked hard. 12. Hater page pops out of no where drops old news as new. Hater page states same person who gave the info on L HBS gave info on N dating L.. but instead of posting hater page defends N. 13. Russian x posted L set up N with DM. Stating they have receipts yet as soon as they go to post receipts site disappears. 14. L and 🦀 in DM again this time stating they were in Brighton with friends. Yet no proof. Same day as N and J at a bar with a friend gets dropped. Of course they don’t get the video of all the friends just N and J again trying to spin the whole dating crap. 15. DM drops a weird podcast stating she got the hint these people should be watched and she sent the pap to London to photograph L and 🦀. Claims 🦀 would never know how to do that yet mentions her name a thousand times. 16. Weird mass cleanup of likes and comments.

that’s sums up I’m sure I missed stuff seems like an attack to me. Poor L

The 🦀 is 🐟y

[chaifootsteps]

Well there even be an audience for season 3 of HB? full moon took 2 weeks to reach 10mil. People are dropping the show and I can’t blame them. The show keeps dropping merch every 2 weeks like there’s an over saturation of HB/HH merch it’s ridiculous. I know fans will buy anything but they’re not rich, shipping is expensive af for both shark robot and Amazon. The fandom is hostile and terrible, the crew participates in bullying and than act like victims when they get rightfully called out for it. The boss and her goons are just traveling the world every week idk how any work is being done. Either tooncity just runs SH now and were brought in to make both HB season 2-4 HH season 2. I honestly don’t think were gonna see season 3 or 4 of HB till 3 or 4 years from now

One possibility is that the audience starts to consist of more and more hate watchers, which I'm sure the stans will accept with good grace and be completely normal about.

[hpowellsmith]

Your writing for this game is flowing so fast and it makes me so happy, cause my anxiety didn't let me wait for RA without checking this form everyday lmao!! It has the potential to be as good as Creme!!

Is chapter 7 the last chapter you'll update before you submit HB to COG?

Thank you, that's incredibly kind 🥹

I'm really pleased that Honor Bound is going so fast and (generally) smoothly, it's been really nice working on it almost full-time. I think Chapter 7 will probably be the last update I put up publicly (it's currently up on Patreon and will go up for everyone on 2nd July).

I'm hoping to write as much of Chapter 11 as I can during June, and hopefully complete the draft in July. Whenever it is completed, what will then happen is:

I will send everything to my editor who will give me notes for Chapters 11-12

I will revise Chapters 11-12

Then at various times, with some overlap the following will happen:

The whole game will be closely reviewed by one of the CoG editors who will send me notes (in the past it's usually been an editor who isn't my main one, so it's fresh for them)

Automatically-generated playthrough seeds will be read by a number of continuity readers who will give me notes about errors, unclear stuff, or sensitivity issues

The beta test for the whole game will happen (usually this is announced publicly and can be signed up for by email - I say usually because a couple of games haven't been organised like that lately and I'm covering all my bases)

Through all that, I'll be editing the game in response to the feedback and putting up updates for the readers and testers.

Once all the edits are done, the game is polished to my satisfaction, and playtesters have slowed down and aren't finding errors anymore, the game will go up be copyedited. That's the stage at which I twiddle my thumbs and feel at a loose end, and also start thinking in more detail about what I want to make next. It's also the stage at which I'll have a clearer idea of the release date.

Then once the copyediting is finished and I've answered any queries about it, once the release date comes around we're ready to go! (I can't remember the timing for my other games, but for Royal Affairs, it was 4 months from the full draft completion to the release date.) And that's the point where I get jittery and nervous, and panic about self-promotion. But I also try to do something nice to celebrate.

After a couple of weeks I have a reasonable idea of sales and reviews (though I really try not to obsess over either) and can use that to make further decisions about what I do next.

So that's an essay you didn't ask for about what my next few months are going to be like!

[cyanoticfireflies]

Hazbin Hotel - Rewatch Thoughts (Episode 1, Part 2)

Charlie kicks into song #1, “Happy Day in Hell,” and KeeKee is just kind of floating in the air listening along with all the rest.  Just an observation.

Okay, so some of the stuff we see in Hell: one very dead ant/praying mantis looking demon, some actually not *that* kinky sex (guys, we’re on AO3… if you know you know), and a slew of dead bodies in the road.  I assume those are fresh kills and not leftovers from last week’s extermination – though maybe?  They smell awful and have flies, which means the dudes picking up corpses in the Pilot are very inefficient at their job.

Real talk about the barbed-wire pair – what’s the status on Sinner/Imp relationships?

 Because in HB we kind of see some of the social stigma of, say, a Goetia prince and an imp.  Though there doesn’t seem to be a whole lot of noise about a Sin and an imp – probably because everyone is way too distracted by Lust falling in love.  And with a Sin and a hellhound, it is telling that the party is populated by imps and hounds exclusively….

We do get an imp and a sinner making out in the music video Addict (the ladies with Valentino) but that strikes me a bit more as “someone told Valentino that lesbians making out was hot and he said “Yeah, sure.”

Anyhow.

I feel like when Charlie hops up on the car we get our first real core philosophical discussion here.  “If I can show them the dream I’ve dreamed, that anyone can change.”  This is *optimism.*  This is highly simplistic so we as first-time viewers of the show can understand Charlie’s personality and motivation.

This is not realistic.

Vivianne did a livestream where she talked about just this idea and that part of the conflict is that maybe not everyone can be redeemed.  Are we holding out high hopes for the loan sharks that came to the hotel with a battering ram in episode 5?  The skeezy sharks that tried to date-rape Angel in episode 4?  *Valentino?*

(That last one actually wouldn’t surprise me that much if they tried it, but also how?  If HH pulls it off and genuinely manages to redeem the most universally hated character in the show, I will be impressed.)

Some people don’t want to change their ways and be redeemed.  Others may have done things so horrific that it’s hard to imagine them being able to truly change their ways and move forward with the rest of their existence.  There’s a sliding scale of what is and isn’t forgivable, and VM said herself that the scale is very person-to-person and it’s something the series will struggle with.

“But I do think there are certain things, you know, to me, from my perspective, that I feel like are irredeemable and, you know, when that line is crossed, I’m like ‘that can’t be uncrossed.’”

Counterpoint to Charlie’s singing, Vaggie starts talking about the angels.  She’s 10,000% convinced that this isn’t going to work, and at this point in the show first-time watchers are just nodding along.

But we know that Vaggie isn’t just repeating anti-angel slander here.  She knows better than anyone in Hell except maybe big Lulu himself what the angels are like because she *was* one.  When she says they’re stubborn, don’t change their minds, are bloodthirsty, she’s talking from hardcore experience.  And specifically exterminator experience.  We only really spend time with Lute as far as the exterminators go, but – as we’ll see later on in this very episode – Vaggie is pretty much hitting the nail on the head describing her own personal knowledge of angels.

Also, it’s worth noting that Vaggie says “those angels,” “they.”  This is partially to avoid spoiling the big reveal later on but also because Vaggie genuinely doesn’t think of herself as an angel anymore.

She no longer has wings.  She’s no longer an exterminator.  She lives in Hell.  She doesn’t have any personal connections – that we’ve seen yet – to anyone in Heaven but has a Hellborn girlfriend.  Vaggie’s life exists in BC and AD in terms of “Before Charlie” and “After Demon [Princess].”  More on this later.

 (What moron killed this dude and then *left. the. drugs?*)

This next part is, to me, where “Happy Day in Hell” cooks.  You sing it, Princess!

So… Travis?  Why???  What is this dude’s deal?  Not even getting into the pilot or Addict videos, but in episode 4 – so actual published show cannon – this guy directs Valentino’s porn.

His literal job is watching porn all day long, live and in 3D.  But he wants to spend his free time watching other porn and getting so randy he’s practically humping the windows?  Me thinks his sins are related to a porn addiction that is very not under control.

Moving on to Cannibal Town, I have a legitimate question.  We’re told that sinners can’t “double-die” unless they take an angelic weapon to the face.  Does that mean that those who are cannibalized in Hell don’t actually die from it? 

And if they won’t die from it, are there people who volunteer to be eaten?  Do the cannibals take turns deciding whose turn it is to eat and whose it is to be eaten?  And then after they’re eaten, do they just respawn?  Is there a lottery system?

It's been a long time since I was in band, but I think the sheet music behind Charlie is actually correct, which is like a super impressive little detail.  Tri-pe-let-hold.  There’s-just-no-way. 

As someone who likes shows where the person “playing” music is so far off of the music that it’s laughable sometimes, it’s just really cool to see.  It probably wouldn’t have been any more – or less – work to just make something up, so there was no reason not to.  But I’ll still give the kudos!

Little detail that cracks me up every time is Husk’s original VA being the flasher Trenchcoat Demon.  “Touch his parts��� indeed. 

Sorry, buddy – only certain fluffy spiders get to touch the parts.  Imagine getting told you’re being replaced by Keith David only for them to find a part for you anyway and it’s that.  Mick Lauer must have a great sense of humor.

Without going into too much detail on my job, I actually do a reasonable amount of communication with and visits to embassies in Washington, DC.  Charlie’s experience of walking straight in the front door and ambling around until she finds the reception desk is definitely a suspend your disbelief moment for me. 

I know the whole point is that it’s abandoned and creepy.  But no metal detectors or bag checks?  At least there is a sign in sheet.

Someone pointed this out, but how does Adam eat through his mask?  I know that the ribs are a hologram, but so is Adam, so assumedly the real Adam is eating real ribs up in, like, the atelier off of Sera’s office? 

In episode 6 we later see him drinking through his mask while he’s walking around with Lute, but that’s normal drinking.  This is like he’s shoving the ribs through a rib-stripper that mechanically separates the meat from the bone.  That whirs.

The hologram part of Adam’s presence does seem to be entirely arbitrary, though, based on whether the scene wants him to pull a prank on Charlie or be slightly threatening.  Her hand goes right through him when they go to shake, but later on he is able to grab her wrist and physically move her. 

Is there a button up in Heaven?

Wait… if Adam is a hologram for Charlie, is Charlie also a hologram for Adam?  Is he in full VR like he’s sitting in the Heaven Embassy in Hell, or is he sitting in his own office and just Charlie’s physical presence is being projected?  Or did the design the two rooms to look the same so no one would get lost on where they are?  If Adam moves a chair in Heaven, does an identical chair move in Hell so that if Charlie walks in that exact spot the two images won’t overlap?

I may be thinking too much about this.

We go back to the hotel, where Vaggie wants to create a new commercial. 

I love that Angel can’t be within a few feet of Husk without basically going “the old man… I desire him.”  Poor Husk.  His eye is actually *twitching.*

Notice me not saying anything about the genuinely impossible physics related to another (missing) eye.  So proud of myself.

Alastor creates a new camera for them, and I’m genuinely curious what his thought process is.  The photo camera he makes seems pretty congruous with his time period (aside from some antler decorations), so it seems like he conjures what is familiar for him.  But when he creates the video camera, it includes an eye and even eyelashes. 

I wonder if this might be related to some part of his backstory with Vox.  We know that Vox has cameras set up all over the place and watches people, so maybe Alastor associates video cameras with being watched.

Vaggie films Husk and Angel first, and I love hearing awesome actors act like they’re awful actors.  But this also makes me curious what the storyboard Vaggie has in mind is.  Also, there’s no way Vaggie actually handed Angel a script that said “big, strong daddy.”  She’d die.

I know the “you come” set up the Angel-filthy-moan joke, but it should definitely be “you’ve come” – possibly setting Angel up for a “not yet, baby” joke…  Either Husk really needs the script that close to his nose to read it or the scriptwriter didn’t get good grades in grammar.

Scrub that counter good later, Niffty and/or Husk.  We know where Angel’s *everything* has been.

… I’m not even asking what the skeletons around the bar are from, but one does look like a snake. 

Maybe that’s why Sir Pentious thought they other residents had it out for him.

I’ll get into this more in episode 4, but even this early we can see Angel adopting some of Valentino’s mannerisms  when he’s making passes at Husk.  “Baby-cakes” from the pet called “Angel-cakes” by his own master…. 

I know it’s upsetting you, Husk, but take the lid off the bottle first.

(We'll pick up in Episode 1, Part 3 due to Tumblr's 30 images-per-post limit.)

[noonajoe]

His Long-Distance Birthday Gift for You (Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader)

“Because of a business trip, that doesn’t mean I have to forget my girlfriend’s birthday, right?”

Word Count: 843

©noonajoe (Published on 22 March 2023 - 13:58 Bangkok Time) this story is not going to be sold, modified, or translated in any manner.

*phone call from Kuroo*

“Tetsu…?”

“Hi Kitten”

“What’s wrong? It’s 10, don’t you have to meet with your clients tomorrow?”

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I have to forget my girlfriend’s birthday?”

“Oh… Oh yeah!”

“Don’t tell me you forgot again”

“Uh, no-no. I mean, I just half-asleep in the living room watching TV, so… Yeah, I remember”

“Heh, is that so… Can I turn on a video call?”

“Wait, my face is really in mess-”

“It’s ok. It’s not like I never saw your bare face. I make it quick, I have something for you but I need to turn the video call”

“Uh. okay…”

*turning on video*

��Okay, I want you to go to my wardrobe”

*walks into their shared bedroom while carrying the phone with video call turned on*

“Okay, see that box on the bottom in a drawer? Get that box on the bed, hon”

“Okay, wait, it’s pretty heavy”

*carrying the medium-sized box into their bed*

“Okay, first. I just want to tell you, happy birthday, hon, sorry I don’t have cakes right now because of our long-distance whereabouts. I want you to open this gift box, but don’t turn off the video, okay? I just want to see your face opening the box”

*Open the box, it contains:*

[A paper written in colored markers and Kuroo’s doodles:]

Dear Kitten,This is my first surprise gift for you, I hope it’s not cheesy

“Happy birthday to my most strong-independent-sometimes stubborn but lovely partner, people said I’m too unrealistic but I do realize I could not pass every challenge in my life for the past 4 years without you. I could say every day is tiring but you always welcomed me. I have 4 gifts inside, I hope you understand each gift’s essential meaning"

*Long Goose Pillow* "I know your anxieties still occur for the past year and it’s worsened when I’m not with you because business trip. Yet, you always never told me:( I know you don’t want me worrying you but still, I know everything even if you don’t tell me ok. This goose pillow is really soft and squishy so I hope you have a good sleep hugging this if I’m not around."

*2 Packages of Miniature Lego* "I’ve talked to some physiologists and Akaashi (Akaashi is a doctor here), actually, lego helps avoid overthinking. Lego also trains your focus, I hope this can reduce your night habit of overthinking or crying. I can estimate if you slowly complete this two it’ll be done in 2 weeks. Just don’t finish it too fast, you’ll get a headache! :<"

*Ipad* "You always use your laptop to hear lofi or lullaby songs to help your anxieties. This iPad has the same features, and the sound system is good as well. Why I didn’t buy you a speaker, because I hope you can also watch movies with this. Sometimes when I suggest you buy Ipad refused because it’s too expensive, yet I want you to feel comfortable watching movies with this effective device rather than watching on your laptop. Plus I already installed nfix and hb*. Don’t feel bothered because I already subscribed to those for you. Don’t dare you pay me back."

*Bunny Lantern* "You know what I always got scared when you always use that dim desk light of yours when we slept. I mean, it’s too dim and sometimes the light turns off when I woke up I almost panicked myself because I thought I’m going blind all sudden. This bunny lantern also have an orange light on it, those lamp can help you through your sleep too. Even if you woke up at night when you see the lamp, hopefully, you can go sleep easily after."

*Wrist strap lanyard with a small picture of both of you* "I know it’s really cheesy but I really want you to have this in your working bag. I really don’t like that boy names (random names) that have been chatted to you each night! He got the lesson when I met him at that time. Plus if you look closer it also contains my number so if there’s something going on people will recognize me as your ‘partner’. Other men will get off you quickly when they saw this keychain."

[Last, a piece of paper glued in the bottom of the box:]

This is my first time not having your birthday on-site. I hope my gifts can at least cover your longing, I also write this by myself. No google translate or help from google sites! The gifts may replaceable but my love is more than this, okay?&lt;3 Your only man, Kuroo Tetsuroo

You literally cried and laugh at the same time because you read each of his messages in the box. You also cried because you don’t know Kuroo has been prepared for this before his business trip, it's a really sweet side of him.

He sees you crying, wiping your tears while unboxing each of gifts.“Oh my, I wish I can hug you right now" he sighed, his smile indicating that he was glad that he prepared this before his 2 weeks business trip.

He asked, "Are you happy? Are my messages too cheesy?”

“No! I’m happy, it’s my first time to have this sort of gift, you know?”

“That’s good then. I’ll see you next 3 days and you can have birthday cuddles, okay? Love you"

“Yes, thank you so much, Tetsu… I love you too”

[mx-ryder]

Some thoughts on Hazbin Hotel

I literally just watched HH this week, followed by binging Helluva Boss on YouTube right after. And my Dash is full of HH and HB stuff now. And the other day I saw someone posted their thoughts on the show, including one specific take that it falls right back under the typical "Sinners are bad but hey, we can fix them!" sort of trope. (I really don't know if I'll be able to find the post again, if I do, I'll reblog/link it here or something).

And hey, I'm not gonna argue that it doesn't, per se. I just think there's a bit more to it than that.

c.w for general religious trauma talk, SA mentions, drug use/abuse, alcohol use, addiction, gambling, probably other things I'm not thinking of

(Also please don't feel like you have to read this. It's literally just me rambling because I haven't been able to stop thinking about this topic all fucking day, so I wrote it down to get it out of my head. Obviously if you read it and want to comment/continue the discussion, feel free. Just please. Be respectful.)

Now.

All my thoughts on HH are very much colored by my past experiences with religion, US christianity, specifically. More specifically still, the sort of christianity that makes people believe that "home schooling" their kids, isolating and indoctrinating them away from anyone who might make them question it all, is the best course of action. I grew up bouncing from church to church, from home schooling co-op to co-op, all so my bio-mom could find the exact group to echo her own sentiments back at her.

Among the things I grew up believing were great ideas such as:

Sexuality is inherently disgusting, and something you should always be forcing down/avoiding/punishing yourself about. Masturbation, porn, sex before marriage, dressing "immodestly", and any sexuality outside of heterosexual were inherently evil and worthy of punishment. Sometimes that punishment was being assaulted, because really, she should've covered up, right? Girls, sometimes girls as young as 12-13 (if not younger) were villainized for wearing tank-tops and shorts, because they were causing the boys to stumble and immodesty was a moral failing on their part.

Drugs, alcohol, substances in general, are bad and wrong and using them, or heaven forbid becoming addicted, is a moral failing on your part. You are a bad person for consuming a drug, and therefore deserve to fall into addiction, houselessness, starvation, and/or abuse.

Poor people deserve it. Accepting help of any kind is leeching off good, hard-working people. Your worth as a person is directly tied to your ability to be a "productive member of society."

Any mental health issues are your fault, and are either because you don't believe in jesus hard enough, or because you're inherently broken and sinful and therefore unsaveable. There is no room for sympathy or empathy for anyone struggling.

There's a reason these are the same stereotypical archetypes you see in this sort of show. The queer sex-addict. The gambler. The "weirdo" who isn't like other people and enjoys "weird" things, or enjoys things "too much". Even just the party-girl character. Because these aren't just stereotypes. These are actual entire groups of people who are ostracized and vilified just for being who they were born to be, for making choices christians don't like, or for being sick.

And that brings me to Angel Dust. Who, by the way, I wish I could've been given a content warning about, because holy shit Ep 4 and Addict hit me really fucking hard. My friend recommended the show to me without having watched it, so I went in not expecting that sort of storyline to punch me in the gut out of nowhere.

Anyway! Angel Dust! Literally named after a drug. A gay porn star who flirts shamelessly with anyone and everyone, who proudly shows off his best films to his friends, who secretly hates his job, not because of the sex, as we come to find out, but because he's under the thumb of a fucking psycho who treats him like shit and actively physically, sexually, and mentally/emotionally abuses him. He's basically been trafficked, and hates that he doesn't have any say in what happens to him in front of the camera. It's a horrifying position to be in, and one that left me a little shaken up, tbf.

The take I'm mostly writing this based on is that Hazbin Hotel falls into the trite tropes of "rich white girl attempts to fix people who are below her" and specifically mentioned disappointment in how Charlie didn't try to argue that Angel Dust didn't deserve hell based only on his addiction or sexual past, but that she instead claimed that she could "fix him."

And I just . . . think that's a little bit of a black/white take.

For the first part, what would people rather she do? Put all her time, effort, influence, and power into trying her damnedest to help her people, who are being slaughtered by the thousands every year just because Adam is bored? Or sit at home and use all that time, effort, influence, and power to make rubber duckies like her father? She could just ignore everything going on, call it hopeless, give up, and ignore the suffering of her people. Would that be better? Would that satisfy this weird little "she's just a rich white girl with privilege" gripe?

Charlie is a rich girl. A princess. Someone with huge amounts of privilege, power, influence, etc. But you know what? She's also stuck in hell. She was born there, through no fault or choice of her own, and because of who her parents are, she is trapped in literal hell, with no hope of ever, ever ascending to heaven. She does not get a chance at redemption, because she was born to the wrong people. She is a young woman who was born into horrifying circumstances, living in a world that she frequently expresses disgust for (her frequent discomfort with sexuality, her disgust toward the cannibals, her dislike of violence, even necessary self-defense).

And she still loves her people and wants to see the best in them.

She would be completely justified in hating everything about hell, her life, the people around her, her parents, heaven, everything, really. She has every right to hate her entire existence, but she puts all that hatred for the system into her efforts to fucking do something about it. Why is that a bad thing, just because she was born into a position of power and authority??

And now on to Angel Dust.

Charlie never once makes a judgement call about Angel or his habits, his work, or his personality. She expresses discomfort with the sexual nature of his work (tbh wouldn't be surprised if she's a sex-repulsed ace), but she does not think he's a bad person because of his work. Nor does she think that he needs to stop doing his work in order to become a better/good person. When she tries to get him some time off, she's explicitly doing it because she wants him to have time to decompress and participate in activities at the hotel, not because she wants him doing less of his specific kind of work.

She never condemns his partying, either. She has a bar in her hotel! She defends him partying, right to heaven's face, because she knows everyone present has partied, everyone has enjoyed a drink with friends. There is no condemnation of his partying activities, and I don't think she ever makes it seem as though Angel needs fixing.

What I got out of that episode, watching Charlie passionately defending her friend in front of the worst fucking person in the universe, was that people do not need to be fixed, but some love and support can help them make better choices for themselves. Angel still has a good time. He still has his job (contract, y'know, but would probably be in the industry regardless). The only thing different about that particular night of partying is that he's out with people who care about him, and who he cares about.

Even Cherri, though she expresses some joking disappointment that he's spending so much time worrying about Nifty, doesn't actually seem that put out by it. She teases him a little, but leaves him to do his thing. And his thing is making sure his friend, who is less experienced at partying (and who is significantly smaller/more vulnerable than most other people), is safe and okay. His thing is defending his friends from an extremely dangerous person, at massive risk to his own personal safety.

And he didn't do any of this because he'd been "fixed" or because he'd "changed." He did it because, for possibly the first time ever, he has people around him who love and care for him, and who want the best for him. And who he loves and wants the best for in return. He said himself that he stays out of his mind on substances, allows himself to be drugged and assaulted, puts on this persona of care-free-crack-whore-who-only-thinks-about-sex, because he is trying everything in his power to dull the pain he's in. Because he doesn't believe he deserves any better.

And this, this is what Charlie is trying to show Heaven. She is trying to show them that there is nothing morally damning about alcohol consumption, or even drug use, sex work, or anything that makes Angel who he is. She's trying to show them that, with some love, care, and support, with a safe place to call home, with their base physical and emotional needs being met, people don't need to resort to the sort of destructive behavior heaven/Adam is condemning! People can choose to engage in these behaviors safely, consciously, and with people around them who want them to be safe and have a good time.

Then we get on to the idea that this entire episode ends on. Heaven doesn't know how people get there. They don't know what it takes to be "good enough" for heaven. Sera herself admits that Adam was just "the first soul in heaven," all but admitting that he's just there because he defaulted into it. (Though that does make me wonder, what about Abel? He would have died long before Adam, and considering how long Adam lived, and that there were plenty of other people around by the time he would have died, where were all those souls going??).

And Adam is the fucking worst! He is literally the worst, most selfish, violent, vulgar soul in the entire show, but he is allowed in heaven, for reasons no one even understands.

You know what the difference is between Adam and Angel?

Adam can't be fixed.

His behaviors are all destructive, not to himself, but to others. He insults, abuses, hurts, and kills with abandon. He made this weird, shitty deal with Hell and Lucifer because he wanted to murder innocent souls, because he was bored, and the rest of heaven doesn't even know about it. He has free reign to be an absolute piece of shit to everyone around him, damaging people left and right, and he will never face any sort of justice for it, because hey, he's already in heaven!

But Angel? Angel's behavior is all self-destructive. Again. He gets fucked up to dull his immense pain. He allows himself to be drugged and assaulted because he believes he deserves it. Because he's been told, for who knows how many thousands of years, that he's a whore anyway, so why shouldn't he be free to use for anyone who wants to take him? He has been beaten down, physically, emotionally, sexually, until he's a shell of a person who is struggling to find any reason to continue his shitty existence.

And he hurts only himself.

I mean, okay, he does piss off Husk sometimes, crosses boundaries/etc. But he and Husk pretty clearly fix that between themselves. There's no lasting damage there, and idk if anyone else noticed, but he stops that behavior pretty much entirely after that ep.

Angel is hurting. He is hollow, and hopeless, and trapped. And he does not need to be fixed, nor does Charlie ever attempt to do so.

All she does is reach out a hand, and say, "Hey, I see that you're struggling. This place is fucked up, isn't it? Maybe I can help."

Charlie is a flawed person. She takes her privilege for granted. She feels the immense weight of her choices, and the pressure of having taken responsibility for a people who may never want her help. She messes up, because somehow, she's endlessly cheerful and optimistic, despite her upbringing and the world she grew up in.

Charlie is flawed. But she's trying her fucking best. She isn't trying to fix. She's trying to help.

We all need some help, every now and then, don't we?

[late-to-the-party-81]

Love, Lies & Electricity - Chapter 4

AN: Week 8 of @buckybarnesevents Hot Bucky Summer! Let’s go!!!!! This is a heavy chapter and contains scenes that may be difficult or even triggering for some. Please mind the tags. For those who wish to skip those scenes, stop reading after the Reader has spoken to Yelena and Kate on the Quinjet and resume when it is two weeks later and Reader is getting a clean bill of health from Dr Cho. I will include a summary of the scenes at the end. On a lighter note, bonus kisses for those who work out what word reader and Bucky decided to transmit for Sam to follow. Catch up on the previous part here.

Extra special hugs for my beta @drabbles-mc.

If you would like to be added to my tag list, click here.

Moodboard by me and dividers by @firefly-graphics

Likes are loved, Reblogs are golden

Master List | HBS Master List

Challenges and Bingos: HBS week 8 - Maybe this’ll help you relax?

Summary: Being rescued isn’t  the end of the story - there’s always the aftermath.

Relationship: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced Reader

Word Count: 3.7k

CW: Hand-wavy science, Flashbacks, Canon typical violence, Medical abortion, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Dash Dash Dash.

With each pulse you let out, you winced, but you had to keep trying.

Dash Dot Dot Dot.

Once Bucky had regained consciousness, disorientated but pleased with himself, you’d helped him move back over to the pair of thin mattresses which you’d pushed together a few days ago. As he’d recovered you’d used the cover of his supine body to twist the exposed end of the wire to one of the very few metal bolts in the wall. Since then, in between druggings and soakings - when you’d begun to dry out a bit and it was less painful, you’d been sending out morse code in radio waves. You just prayed it was going somewhere.

Dot Dot Dot Dot.

Hopefully the fact that the letters were jumbled up and that your pulses were infrequent would mean that your captors would be none the wiser..

Dash

Bucky was currently sleeping, recovering from his injuries. Hydra hadn’t let the pair of you rest though, and during the most recent round of the aphrodisiac induced coupling, you’d had to do most of the work. You should be hating it - and part of you absolutely did - but at the same time the pleasure he wrung from your body - that couldn’t all be the drug, right? Your memories taunted you, telling you it had always been like this, as much as you tried to deny them. However, with everything else going on, and given what you’d said to him during the first, frantic coupling, neither of you had addressed the elephant in the room. 

Dot Dot.

You hadn’t spoken about what had caused you to break up.

A few times you’d caught him looking at you, sadness in his eyes. Regret as well. It didn’t help that that traitorous part of you was begging to hear him out - listen to his reasons and…

Dash Dot Dot Dot.

“Ow! Motherfucker!” You let go of the wire and sucked at your palm, trying to soothe the pain that had lanced across it. As if on cue, the sprinklers came on.

Rescue, when it came, felt anticlimactic. You were asleep when it started, but Bucky shook you awake, his enhanced hearing alerting him to some disturbance outside of your cage before it even became audible to you. You were too damp to do anything other than create a few sparks in your hand, so you didn’t make a fuss when Bucky angled his body between yours and the door. Even with only one arm he was still more formidable than you were in your current state.

“Ready?” he asked and you nodded back, a grim look of determination plastered to your features.

“As I’ll ever be.”

The door opened and you both tensed, ready to fight. When Sam came through, it took you a few seconds to process what you were seeing. In fact, it was only when Sam spoke that you managed to unfreeze.

“Are you guys alright?” Sam pushed his goggles up onto his head. His wings were retracted due to the tight space, but the shield was still strapped to his left forearm, at the ready. Bucky strode over and the two embraced, a hug full of emotion.

“We’re okay, Sam. Thank you.”

However, you weren’t quite as ready to relax as Bucky was apparently, and without a word you barged past the pair of them, out into the corridor and into the maze of the unknown bunker you were in. You heard both Bucky and Sam call for you, their voices laden with concern, but you were a woman on a mission. A woman who knew how Hydra thought. Therefore, it didn’t take you more than a few minutes, stepping around bodies both unconscious and still for other reasons, to find the room you were looking for.

You burst through the door of the laboratory, not certain what you were going to find, but almost uncaring. Your tormentor was tied up on the floor, between two young women you didn’t recognise. One of them, a brunette in a black and purple suit, held a bow in her hand, an arrow knocked and aimed at the scientist's head. The other, blonde and in a far more sensible tac suit, stood at the computer console, going through all the data with a nauseated look on her face.

Letting out an almost inhuman scream, you launched yourself at him, barreling him over. You straddled his chest and pressed your hands to his neck, letting what little power you had flow into him. You grinned, sickly, as he jerked, jolted and screamed beneath you.

“I’m going to kill you, you sicko. I’m going to be the last thing you see, the last thing you hear. You will die by my hand!”

You were aware of several voices shouting around you, but your attention was on him. That was until something - someone - crashed into you, knocking you to the floor. You screamed again in hysterical desperation, kicking out with your legs, and your sheet dress loosened around you.

“Please,” said a voice in your ear. “I don’t wanna hurt you. But you have to stop.” You turned your head and looked up into the dark eyes of Joaquin. His hands gripped your wrists, stopping you from touching anything, stopping you from touching him. “You’re safe. You and Bucky. We’ve got you. And we’ll deal with him. Just not like this.”

The fight went out of you, and a sob bubbled up your throat. Your hands stopped sparking and you turned in Torres’ arms and let your tears run free.

Spring 2014

You’d just been moved to the chair for more testing when the alarms started to go off. The orderlies and scientists around you looked up, startled and confused. A man in a military uniform you’d seen some people here wear ran into the room.

“We need to evacuate!” he shouted before running out again. The room descended into chaos. Someone moved close to you, undoing the straps that they’d only just tightened around your legs and arms, obviously intent on taking you with them in their escape from whatever the heck was going on. However, in their rush, they hadn’t secured your rubber gloves properly.

As soon as you were free from your bonds, you didn’t waste a second. The person who’d freed you barely had a moment to realise their mistake before they were dropping to the ground, either passed out or dead, you weren’t sure. You started running then, pushing past some people and shooting bolts of energy at others. You weren’t sure where you were going, you just knew you had to get out. Had to get away.

Sweat dripped down your forehead, running into your eyes, and the hard ground beneath your feet, littered with small bits of gravel and other debris, dug into your bare feet, but you didn’t care. Didn’t stop. Out. Out. Out. Your mind had the word on repeat, just in case you forgot what your end goal was. The flow of people around you, people who obviously worked here in the Octopus’ lair but didn’t know who you were well enough to steer clear, was going upwards, so that’s where you went as well. It made sense in a way, that you were underground, because you’d never seen a window in all your time here, being moved between your cell and the lab. Up and up you went, running up concrete stairwells, only slowing to stop someone from following you, until you burst through an emergency door and out into the sunlight.

The brightness of it hurt your eyes and quickly ran towards the nearest shade - a big tree. You registered the feeling of grass under your feet and breathing hard, you looked around trying to get your bearings. The ground in every direction was covered by row after row of white stones, laid out in military precision, and beyond them you could see a wide river. Birds were chirping and there was a light breeze, lending an air of peace of the like you hadn’t felt in so long.

Suddenly there was the sound of a loud explosion and you turned to see a fireball in the air. Smoke and fire and the debris of some kind of giant aircraft rained down, landing into the river, sinking to the bottom. As you watched you swore you saw a person fall along with the chunks of metal, and then a moment later a second. Did this have something to do with the underground chaos? However, you had no time for further musing because a shout from behind you reminded you that you were in the middle of your own escape. Turning, you let your powers arc out of you and hit the person bearing down on you with some kind of gun clutched in his fists. He dropped to the ground and you sprinted away, your lungs full of fresh, life-giving air.

The atmosphere on the quinjet was tense. You’d intentionally separated yourself from Bucky once you’d all gotten aboard. You were too fragile to deal with him right now. 

After you’d cried yourself out in Torres’ arms, he’d passed you over to the two women who’d come to help him and Sam rescue you. You were certain that in your struggle with him he’d seen far more of your naked body than either of you was comfortable with, although now you’d regained your equilibrium you were glad for his intervention.

Your new acquaintances, Kate and Yelena, had helped you cover yourself back up for the walk back to the jet, then Yelena had sat with you, holding your hand in hers without fear as Kate had rummaged through bags and boxes to find you any kind of clothing that would fit. Neither had pressured you to talk or gone further than checking you over for major physical injuries.

“We’ll take you to medical when we get back to the compound,” Yelena had said in accented English. “I’m afraid that you will need to have a full work up to make sure there are no long lasting side-effects.”

“I need Levonorgestrel, or Ulipristal acetate.”

Yelena’s lips twisted in sympathy. “The pair of you were in there for two weeks. It might be too late for either of those.”

“Mifepristone and Misoprostol then.”

Kate came and sat on your other side. “Do you want confirmation before you take them?”

“No.” Even you could tell your voice was unnaturally flat. Tired. “I don’t want to know. I need you to tell the doctor that. Please.” The pair nodded, understanding exactly. You gave them a small smile, then lent your head back, closed your eyes and finally, allowed yourself to rest.

You were back in the same sterile guest room at the compound you’d been in before the mission. The mission that had been one big trap to return you to Hydra’s clutches. You’d been cleared by medical, a kindly doctor called Helen Cho who had worked with SHIELD and the Avengers for a long time. She’d given you a cream for your intimate parts that were understandably sore after what they’d been put through the last two weeks, and some pills, with strict instructions on how to use them. Yelena and Kate had done as you’d asked, giving the doctor your instructions. You needed to put this behind you as soon as you could. You’d taken the first tablet under her supervision.

On your own for the first time since your rescue, you tried to keep yourself occupied - distracted - but nothing seemed to be working. Despite having access to all the TV and film entertainment you might want, there was nothing you wanted to watch. There were no books you wanted to read or games you wanted to play. You stared out of the window until it began to overwhelm you, and then you began to pace. When that made you stir crazy you went back to the window. Rinse and repeat.

Three hours in you got your first abdominal cramp.

Two hours later you were curled up on the bed, hissing through the pain. Tears ran down your face. Logically you knew that this had been your only sensible option, and you’d expected the physical discomfort. But the emotional pain? The feeling of loss? That had not even occurred to you. 

There was a knock at the door, but you ignored it, screwing your eyes shut even tighter as another cramp wracked your body.

A further knock.

“Go away!” you shouted through the tears. Your arms were wrapped around your waist and you rocked side to side on the mattress. A creaking sound from behind you let you know that whoever was outside hadn’t taken no for an answer, but you didn’t have the energy to get up and chastise them. The bed dipped and a warm body pressed up against yours, a vibranium arm settling over your own across your middle.

“It’s gonna be okay, sweetheart.”

Your heart cracked in two. “It hurts so much,” you sobbed.

“I know it does.” There was strain evident in Bucky’s voice and you knew then that he understood that you weren’t talking about the cramps. He pressed a kiss to the back of your head and then moved away again. You flipped over on the bed, one hand outstretched as if to drag him back to your side.

“Stay. Please. I need…” you trailed off. Even in your anguish you were unable to fully voice what you wanted to say.

“‘M not going anywhere, doll. Just gonna run you a bath. Maybe it’ll help you relax - make you feel a bit better. It’ll be good to be properly clean, won’t it?”

You nodded, acknowledging the truth of his words as you took in the way Bucky’s hair lay in clean, fluffy tufts across his scalp. You hadn’t actually cleansed yourself yet, too caught up in waiting for the drugs to do what they would, and the daily soakings the pair of you had received obviously didn’t count. 

Bucky ducked into the en-suite and you heard the water start. You snorted at the irony that you were about to turn your powers off again, after only just drying out enough to get them back, but it had to be done. When Bucky returned you let him help you up and support you through to the bathroom. You sat down on the closed toilet seat and looked up at him as he stood in the doorway.

“Could you… umm…” It felt daft to be feeling shy after what you’d both gone through together, but those had been extenuating circumstances. Bucky gave you a nod of understanding though.

“Sure. You undress yourself, but just to let you know, once you’re in the water I’m coming in to sit with you. I’m not letting you go through this alone, okay?”

“Okay,” you agreed. It seemed right that he’d be the one here with you through this.

It took you longer than you thought it would to divest yourself of your borrowed clothes although it obviously wasn’t more than a few minutes. You sank into the warm water with an audible sigh and the bubbles on the surface bobbed around.

“Can I come back in?” Bucky asked from outside the door which you’d left ajar.

“Yeah.” You leaned your head back and closed your eyes, letting the warmth and the bath salts ease the physical aches and pains in your body. You heard him walk through and settle on the floor next to the bath. You let your left arm, that had been resting on the edge of the tub, drop down and the ache in your heart and mind lessened when Bucky threaded the fingers of his right hand with yours.

Two weeks later and Dr. Cho declared you fit and well, with no lingering physical side-effects. The mental ones though? They would take much longer to heal.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” she asked, but you shook your head with a gentle smile.

“I’m sure. I need to get back to my life - find a sense of normalcy. And I have a therapist I can call. Get myself booked in.”

She smiled back at you. “That all sounds positive. But you know where I am if you need me. Yelena and Kate too. Oh, and Joaquin. He’s formed quite the attachment.”

A chuckle escaped you. She wasn’t wrong there. As soon as the worst effects of your medication were over, and you were up and moving around the compound, Torres had been like your personal manservant - fetching you cups of tea, candy bars, tacos. Whatever your heart desired. He was a sweet young man, and felt to you like the brother you’d never had, or maybe a younger cousin. The only downside of his devoted attention was that it coincided with Bucky withdrawing his. He’d been by your side through the worst of it, making sure you took your pain meds, providing heat pads and changing your sheets, but as soon as you didn’t need him anymore he’d all but disappeared. It hurt almost as much as what you’d just gone through. However, as you’d just said to Helen, it was time to move on. 

It didn’t take you long to pack up the bag that you’d brought with you a month ago, and as you turned to look at the room it was as though you’d never been here at all. Which, you supposed, was how it should be. Everything back to how it had been before any of this happened. 

The Hydra scientist who’d kidnapped the pair of you was recovering from his new electrical burns in the secure wing of a local hospital, being watched over by members of SWORD. He’d never be able to hurt anyone else, ever again. 

Yelena had downloaded all of the data before she’d used her own skills to fry the fuck out of the bunker computer, and then given you the flash drive, so you could decide what to do with it. You’d fried it with the highest voltage you could muster without a second thought. All that was left to do was leave.

Awkwardly, all of them were waiting for you down in the parking garage. Yelena gave you a gentle hug. Kate threw her arms around your neck and made you promise not to be a stranger. Joaquin fidgeted and stuttered out his goodbye until you stunned him into silence by planting a kiss on his cheek. Sam held out his hand to you, one professional to another, and apologised for the umpteenth time about what had happened. Then the four of them left, leaving you alone with Bucky.

You turned away from him, securing your bag to your bike. The silence between you was thick and heavy with things that were unsaid. You knew you no longer hated him - you’d been through too much together for that - but you weren’t comfortable with him either. How did you get comfortable around the man who’d broken your heart, who you’d then been kidnapped and forced to do the unthinkable with, and then who’d supported you through something so incredibly intimate?

When you couldn’t stall the inevitable any longer you turned back around. “This is good-bye, I suppose?” You flashed him a wan smile. “I’d like to say it’s been a pleasure, but - you know - that would be a total lie.”

Bucky let out an amused huff at your attempt at levity. “I can’t change your mind by asking you not to go, can I?”

You shook your head. “I know you care, Buck, but I still can’t trust you. Goodbye.”

You threw your leg over your bike and took hold of your helmet. You were just lifting it up to place it over your head when Bucky gently, but firmly, pulled it from your grip, placing back on the front of your bike.

“No.”

“No?” Your brow furrowed. “You don’t get to tell me no, James Barnes.”

“I - no - I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just -” he let out a laden breath. “I was never going to ask you to join us, okay? I know that’s what Sam wanted me to do, and I’ll admit I was intending to do it, but as soon as I met you, as soon as we had that first conversation where we talked about what we’d both been through, I knew I couldn’t ask that of you. Even if we hadn’t ended up together I wouldn’t have done it. You deserved the peace of being out of the fight. The peace of being able to heal and put it as far behind you as you could.”

You looked at him, eyes wide in shock and confusion, as he continued.

“And then this god-damn mission. The way it was so obvious that we needed you to get in. That scientist - he admitted they’d been keeping tabs on you, looking for the right way to get you back, and being with me - being linked to the Avengers - it gave them the opportunity they needed. I’m so sorry.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Bucky silenced you with a raised hand.

“No - and I do mean it now - you can’t tell me not to be sorry. I’ll keep being sorry for the rest of my life. Through my stupidity you got hurt not once but twice, and I can never make it up to you. But I had to tell you. I needed you to know that I never betrayed you.”

He cupped your face with his left hand, and instinctively you reached up to press the cool metal to your face, looking up at him with watery eyes.

“And,” he added, “I never stopped loving you.” He lent down, dropping a brief kiss to your lips and your eyes closed, trying to stop the tears. Bucky pulled his hand from your gentle grasp and when you opened your eyes again he was gone. It was just you and your bike, alone in the garage.

You swiped at your eyes and fanned at them with your hand to dry the tears, then placed your helmet on, started your engine and roared away. Tomorrow was a brand new day and you were heading towards it.

Chapter 5

Summary of scenes that cover the medical abortion: The reader is in her assigned guest room. She has taken the pills she needs to after being seen by Dr Cho. She is restless and unable to relax and then the cramps begin. A couple of hours later, with the medication really taking effect she is wrangling with both the physical and emotional toll of what she is going through. Bucky comes to her room, offering comfort that she accepts, finding something ‘right’ about him being with her through this. He runs her a bath and once she is in and under the bubbles he comes to keep her company, sitting on the floor next to the tub and they hold hands as she allows herself to relax.

Tags: @km-ffluv, @wheezy-stucky, @kmc1989, @kombatfather1796

@christywrites, @alexakeyloveloki, @wolfsmom1, @doasyoudesireandlive,

@goldylions, @galactusdevourerofworlds, @apenny4thots,

@crayongirl-linz, @nicoline1998enilocin, @king814318, @blackhawkfanatic,

@loreniscrying, @scram1326

[autisticempathydaemon]

sorry if this is a lil long (￣□￣;)!!

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why?

there are a few albums (igor, damn., songs) ive been listening to on loop for a few weeks now, but if i were to narrow it down to one song it would be “forwards beckon rebound” by adrianne lenker ^_^. i liked it when i first listened to the album in full but then found out my boyfriend liked it, so i LOVE it now. 

What is your Enneagram type?

INFP-T, 4w3

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why?

i LOVE them!! i really enjoy jacob geller’s video essays, specifically his video “how can we bear to throw anything away?”. i think its SUPER cool and very poetically justifies my hoarding. though for GARGANTUAN, i like flawed peacock’s 7 hour and 42 minute video on “who’s lila”, which i still havent finished.

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend.

when i was around 9 i used to be called “daffodil” when teased so i turned daffodil into my alter ego and spoke to her with pure hatred

What is your go-to way to fall asleep?

most of the time i scroll and scroll and scroll until im about to pass out from exhaustion, but when im NOT doing that, either put on music or a sleep aid audio n stare at my ceiling til i fall asleep.

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?)

im trans and have been out to my friends for around 3-4 years now, and i changed my name to my current one due to dissatisfaction with my previous name choice and my fixation on the character i named myself after.

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why?

ashers 2021 hbs. its so sweet and silly and full of love <3 i love asher and i love fluff :3

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.)

guy. hes alright but i just dont see the appeal character-wise. hes kind of just erik’s self-insert or low-effort character which is great for him but not that interesting for me.

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to.

book + movie: the perks of being a wallflower, and tv show: brooklyn 99. i was DEEPLY into tpobaw a few months ago and finished the book (with annotations) in 4 days. charlie kelmeckis is me!! as for b99, its my comfort show and i’ve rewatched it at least 6 times in full.

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend?

caelum :3 i need to hug him asap!! need to bake with him!!

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.)

no specific topic, but ill start talking about how much i love something or someone. tired me is very loving. according to my best friend i talk a lot about my boyfriend when im sleepy.

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo.

diet coke and ice cream ^_^ 

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment. 

there are a few, but my top three are a playlist containing every alex g song i like, a playlist full of love songs of all different genres and artists, and a playlist i made in 2022 when i was into more obscure rock ^_^. but mostly i listen to adrianne lenker or kendrick lamar on shuffle.

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why?

video essays talking about drake vs kendrick. i swear ive watched over a hundred videos related to that drama, mostly cause i love kendrick so much and have been a drake hater since 2015. 

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are!

im a big lover of the arts!! both visual (i draw both traditionally and digitally, and have tried painting) and musical (big music fan + very amateur singer and guitarist). i really like movies, but i like movie analysis youtube videos more! in that same vein, i love horror media but am too scared most of the time to actually consume it, so i watch a lot of horror explanation or analysis videos.

im an extremely awkward person to talk to, like severely. also i like minecraft a lot, avid hermitcraft watcher.

Type Fours are so lovely, so internally complex and magnificent and creative despite and perhaps in conjunction with their introversion. I think a fellow introvert would especially appreciate that about you- Anton, specifically.

Another reason I like y’all together is this enneagram type (and MBTI) tends to be very feelings based, very pathos motivated, and that would contrast from Anton whose life and job are so technical, so logos-y. You bring so much light and verve into his life; whenever he sees art, he thinks of you and how it would make you feel. You make him think more about how he feels, you know? The art you create and the way you experience art, the way you enjoy things, makes him marvel.

And you do love to enjoy things with him, to show new things and movies and shows, because his marvel in turn makes things even more fun for you! Anton strikes me as the type of guy who knows nothing about pop culture if left alone, so you get to show him everything. He likes Brooklyn Nine Nine a lot more than he thought. (Terry is his favorite; he also likes yogurt and wants to be a girl dad.) He doesn’t give a single shit about the Kendrick/Drake beef but you’re so animated when you talk about it, he listens raptly. He doesn’t really enjoy horror, but it doesn’t scare him either so he’s a comforting presence whenever you decide to try watching some.

Song:

A volcano erupted/ And the stars fell one by one/ And finally I'm done right/ And it's a kite trapped in my mind/ But I don't mind/ I think of your hands on my body/ And they feel nice/ Just one more night

(Thank you again, Spotify Artist Radios, because I don’t listen to a lot of folk! This is a new song for me!) I chose this one for you and Anton because of the phrase “velvet kind of mood”, because it makes me think of how Anton’s love would tactile-y feel- warm, plush, heavy like a weighted blanket and just as comforting. The lyric “just one more night” also made me think of Anton holding onto you the night before he leaves, so I could not resist.

Runner-ups:

Geordi is the first runner-up that came to mind because he strikes me as the most… artistically inept of the redacted bois if you will- thus, he would feel the most awe and reverence and your prowess. Plus, I like to headcanon him as trans, and we love a t4t couple. Asher is my favorite runner up for you though, but I can’t quite word why. I think it’s something about his extrovert energy against yours.

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[buckets-and-trees]

Hot Bucky Summer 2023 Masterlist

hosted by @buckybarnesevents

I can't believe those thirteen weeks are gone! This was my first longer event, and although a new job/life things interfered with finishing all thirteen weeks before the deadline, I completed TEN (and am close to finishing the other three, so I will get those out soon).

I want to thank the BBE mods for their support throughout the summer and for HOSTING SUCH A FUN EVENT! It was low stress, no pressure, and having so many different prompts got my muse to be very creative. I ended up writing some things totally new and out of my norm, and that produced some of my (and YOUR) favorite new stories!

1 June 1st - June 7th | “What should I wear?” / Lingerie Sacrificial Minotaur!Bucky x Reader, smut/monster fucking

2 June 8th - June 14th | “What should I call you?” / Sir] Talk Pleasure Dom!Bucky x Reader, BDSM AU, smut

3 June 15th - 21st | “Where do you want me?” / Kneeling, In My Lap Perfectionists Bucky x Reader, Gamer AU, smut

4 June 22nd - June 28th | FREE WEEK | Optional prompts: “C” Cock Warming Test Play Bucky x Reader, Gamer AU, smut

5 June 29th - July 5th | “When I first met you…” / Fireworks, Electricity Buck's Eleven Bucky, Steve, referenced Bucky x Reader, referenced smutty activities

6 July 6th - July 12th | “How do you want me?” / Spread Open Devour, pt. 2: FAT Mob Boss!Bucky x Reader, smut

7 July 13th - July 19th | “Who’s this?” / My Pet He Bought a Studio Bucky x Nat, AU where Steve stays and Nat's alive post-Endgame, smut and fluff

8 July 20th - July 26th | “How did you meet?” / Undercover Mission, High Stakes Op The Pool Party Op Bucky x Reader, post-TFATWS, smut

9 July 27th - August 2nd | FREE WEEK | Optional Prompts: “S” - Sex Pollen Desperate Bucky x Reader, smut, angst

10 August 3rd - August 9th | “Long day at work?” Devour, pt. 3: ACID

11 August 10th - August 16th | “Give me a colour.” | [Red | Yellow | Green] soon to be finished Devour, pt. 4: HEAT

12 August 17th - August 23rd | “Who’s my ____?” | [Good Boy/Girl | Perfect Fuckhole | Little Slut] soon to be finished Bucky x Reader

13 August 24th - August 30th | FREE WEEK | [Optional Prompts: “B” - Belly Bulge, Bossy Saturday Night Movie Marathon Bucky x Reader, smut and fluff

Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest

HBS Official EVENT PAGE

BBE's Discord

[thompsborn]

any news on hb ch17?! if you’ve got shit going on or just anyway like there’s absolutely no pressure I was just wondering if you had any idea when it’s likely to be out? I miss it lmao

hi yes sorry!!

i was very confident that i’d get it done and posted by the end of april, but i’ve also been applying to new jobs and started getting some interviews finally which has taken up a decent amount of time, BUT!

i’m not promising anything, but i have like half of next week off and i have a follow-up interview in about an hour for a job that would have much better hours if i were to get it, because tbh the reason i have been so slow in writing and posting fics at all is because my current job has hours that just do not agree with me mentally or physically (split shift where i wake up at 4:30 am and dont get home until like 7pm every week day lmao send help) so once i have a new job i’ll actually have the time AND the energy to write more!!

so, i haven’t finished chapter 17 and because of me being in the process of interviewing for (and hopefully getting) this new job or some other new job and then the transition period that would happen from my current job into a new one, i can’t say for sure when i’ll get it done, but i’m about like halfway done with it and with me having half of next week off from work and also having no plans for this weekend it is definitely POSSIBLE for me to get a lot of progress on it

no promises, and even if i do make a lot of progress that doesn’t necessarily mean that i’ll finish it, and if i do finish it that doesn’t mean it’ll be able to get beta read right away (i’ll have to message evie and such) so i’m not gonna promise anything, but it’s definitely in progress and i’m definitely trying to get it done!!

and hopefully i get a new job asap so that i’m able to write more in general, because before my job got so exhausting i was able to post like at least one chapter/fic every month or two, and it would be SUPER cool to be able to get back to doing that!!

maybe i’ll post some snippets from chapter 17 while working on it this weekend though, just to get SOMETHING out there while finishing it lmao

thank u for ur patience and kindness 🥺❤️