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ruthiswriting · 3 years ago

Text

body of choice

chainsaw man | denji, power, hayakawa aki, gen, 5k | on ao3

“It’s just…” He stopped. “You really don’t care about tits?”

There was a long silence, punctuated only by low buzz of Aki’s desk lamp. “You care about tits,” Aki said finally, “an unusual amount.”

(or: Time off work means that Denji gets to spend a lot of time thinking about what exactly it is that he likes about tits, anyway. Gender is involved. Power helps.)

inspired by my roommate’s headcanon that denji is a trans lesbian and doesnt know it yet! this fic takes place after the international assassin arc but before ch 73.

trigger warning for denji making transphobic statements due to the fact that he doesnt know that being trans is a thing, internalized transphobia, and body dysphoria. general disclaimer that i am not a trans woman but have been known to experience a gender from time to time. enjoy!

They’d all been given time off work, after the Darkness Devil. A leave of absence for Aki to recover, for Power to get her head screwed back on straight, and for Denji to sit and wait for them to be well, since he wasn’t allowed to go on work missions by himself. It was coming to an end soon— Aki had acclimated to his one arm pretty well, and Power didn’t wake up screaming anymore, so they’d be back to work soon.

Still, Denji was running out of ways to fill the empty time. Having nothing to do made him sizzle with nervous energy, waiting for something to do, for a task and directive to achieve. Aki provided the direction of reading materials, movies, and chores— but it still gave him too much time to think.

So it was a lazy afternoon, not long after lunch but still too early for another meal, when Denji asked Power a question.

“Hey, Power,” he said. “You took over a dead body, right?”

She was stretched out on the floor on her back, hugging Meowy in her arms— Aki always said that she held him too tightly, but no matter what Power did the stupid cat purred like a pleased, rusty motorboat. Denji’s question made her stall, frowning as Meowy squirmed. “Eh?”

“That’s what Aki said a fiend was,” Denji said, rolling onto his elbow to look at her from the couch. “A devil that took over a human’s dead body. So you did that, right?”

She paused, thinking this over— reaching for something hidden in her memory. Then her eyes widened, and she sat up. “That’s right,” she said, suddenly triumphant. She rubbed one finger under her nose, pivoting Meowy to rest awkwardly in the crook of her other arm. “I forgot… The way Power was born!”

There was the beginning of the story in the gleam of her eyes— something that would go on, and be uninteresting and mostly nonsensical. “Yeah, I don’t really care about any of that,” Denji said, before she could begin. “I was just wondering, like,” he paused, and one hand rose up, like he could better form the thought if he could grab it. “…Why’d you end up picking the body you did?”

“I used whatever was convenient,” she said. “Of course, my body is the best body I could have gotten. Tis one of the reasons I am so perfect.”

“So you didn’t care about what it looked like?”

Power sniffed, immediately dismissive of the question. “Only humans care about things like that,” she said. Denji could tell she was starting to lose interest in the conversation— she was starting to lift Meowy in front of her, the cat’s little arms jutting awkwardly toward her as his body dangled. “It is very sad! The only good devil feature I have now are my horns… Human bodies really are so unappealing. And they all look the same.”

This caught Denji off guard. He slid forward on the couch, trying to get Power’s attention again to argue. “Huh? That’s not true at all. We all look completely different. Like, you don’t look anything like me. And Aki looks super different from us…” His argument warmed up slowly as he cooked it over, and suddenly, he was invigorated. “We all look super fucking different! That’s crazy.”

“What are you two talking about?” Aki appeared in the doorframe, his one remaining arm wrapped over the white laundry basket he’d been struggling with the whole day.

“Denji is jealous of my perfect body,” Power said.

“No way!”

Before Power could say anything else stupid, Meowy squirmed over her shoulder to land on the ground behind her with a thump. She wheeled again to grab at him, but he scooted comfortably out of her arm’s reach to vanish under the couch, curling his patchy tail around his feet. “Meowy!”

Denji pointed at her, victorious. “That’s what you get. He’s not gonna come out for the rest of the day.”

“You two, stop fighting,” Aki said, before Power’s high pitched whine could end in a yell. “Denji, help me hang up the laundry. And Power, you need to clean Meowy’s litter box. It stinks.”

“Meowy should be allowed to shit wherever he wants,” Power grumbled.

“He does shit wherever he wants,” Aki said. “He just has better manners than you.”

As he stood on the balcony with Aki, picking up shirts one by one to hang, Power’s words continued to turn in Denji’s chest, until they finally stopped to lodge themselves there at an uncomfortable angle. It felt like he’d swallowed a piece of food before chewing it all the way through, and some piece was sticking there. His breaths couldn’t dislodge it.

Was he jealous of Power’s body?

No. There was no way. Why would he want a body like Power’s?

He’d seen a lot of Power’s body. All of it, actually. He knew what it looked like, what it felt like— even what it tasted like, not that he’d wanted to drink her blood. And he’d decided, pretty thoroughly, he wasn’t interested. Whatever exciting mystery lay under a girl’s clothes had fallen flat when it was attached to Power.

But maybe there was something else to want about her body? Something not about sex, or touch. He couldn’t name it. Or maybe, eventually, he could name it— but he definitely shouldn’t.

Laundry ended with hanging their spare public safety uniforms, all in an identical line. Denji was bigger than Power, and Aki was taller than both of them— still, they were all close enough in size that their clothes could easily mingle together in a confused heap. Denji had gotten halfway through getting dressed into Power’s too-small clothes to know he couldn’t wear her pant size, but on the line they almost looked identical. Empty squares of fabric, wafting in the warm breeze. When the sleeves moved, they looked like they were waving in time.

“You’re thinking about something,” Aki said.

He was kneeling by the now empty laundry basket, because even though Denji could have hung the laundry by himself in about the same amount of time, Aki had insistently stayed to pass the laundry to him. Denji guessed he just didn’t like being able to finish the stuff he could before, when he had both arms, and that maybe if he stuck around to the end of the task it was like he could do it anyway. But also, it felt like he was watching Denji. Waiting for something important.

Denji clipped the last shirt up, letting the clothespin clap shut around the starched white collar. “It’s nothin’ important,” he said. “Don’t worry about it.”

The next day, Denji remembered something that brought him back to Power, reading through a manga that Aki had brought home from the conbini.

“I thought of something else about what you said that doesn’t make sense,” Denji said, standing over her.

She had to move the volume down out of her face to look at him, scowling immediately at the interruption. “What?”

“You said that you don’t care about your body, but you do,” Denji said, accusatory. “You wore those— fake boob things. Why the hell would you do that if you didn’t care about what your body looked like?”

She stared at him, and Denji could see from her expression, instantly, she’d forgotten the whole conversation already. Power forgot about a lot of shit, admittedly, but for some reason it felt like a bad sign— like Denji was putting way too much thought into something stupid. He went on pointlessly to add, “you know— what we talked about. How you said human bodies are gross…”

“Correct. Human bodies are gross,” Power said, instantly confident even if she’d forgotten the context. “But there are ways to make them less gross.”

She sat up, throwing the magazine aside. Denji jerked back, out of the circumference of her turning legs, and watched her draw herself up. “It is also helpful to have large breasts,” she said, confident. “Because many people desire them, and so they act in useful ways— like when you helped me save Meowy.” She folded her legs under her and crossed her arms, with sudden finality.“Isn’t that right?”

“Well— yeah,” Denji said. “But you couldn’t have known I would do that before we met…” His eyes flickered to her chest automatically at the memory— she wasn’t wearing them right now, so her t-shirt hung loosely against her body.

“But I knew humans are disgusting. And that they would be interested in me having larger breasts.” She crossed her arms and legs at once, forming a defiant pretzel. “Maybe you should try it some time, Denji.”

Any further argument Denji had against this line of reasoning immediately evaporated. He felt his face flush instantly, and he struggled for words— or anything at all, really. “What—“ he stopped, sputtering. “Don’t be fucking stupid! I can’t have tits, I’m a guy.”

“Why not?”

He stared at her, bewildered. “Cause— cause guys don’t have tits.”

It was so obvious it felt stupid to say— but even with it being obvious it felt like a weak argument. Power wrinkled her nose. “Stupid! Very stupid, Denji. Come with me.” She stood up, briefly on the couch before hopping down next to him. And then, she grabbed his arm and marched him to the bathroom, her fingers making a vise grip against his skin.

“You’re lucky I’m here to help you,” Power said, shutting the bathroom door behind them. This seemed like a bad sign to Denji— Power had to practically be bribed to not leave the door open when shitting, and she didn’t care when they shut the door either. She was trying to cut off his escape route. “Humans are so limited and rigid in their thinking! It’s very boring, so I will help you.”

She was wriggling out of her t-shirt as she talked, discarding it on the floor between them. Then, she ducked her arms behind her back to undo the clasps on her bra. That wasn’t really a big deal— Denji had seen Power naked before, and he’d done her laundry enough times to know what her underwear looked like. But he was starting to feel nervous about wherever this conversation was going. “Power,” he said, eyes flickering to follow her movements, “I don’t know about this.”

“I’m only trying to show you,” she said. “That it is very easy. And that humans do look alike.”

And then, she was pulling his shirt off— Denji choked as the cloth dragged against his mouth, arms jerking up automatically to follow the movement. His shirt joined hers on the floor.

With businesslike hands, Power turned him around so he was staring at the blank drywall. He felt the bra drag around his ribcage. “Whoa— whoa,” Denji yelped.

“Don’t bother fighting me! This is for your own good!” She was snapping the clasps in place, so it was snug against his body. They scratched against his back as they clicked.

Then, she pulled the straps over his arms. Denji felt his eyes drop, to where his cleavage would be, if he had cleavage (but he didn’t because he was a guy, and so he shouldn’t be thinking about this). The rip cord of his chainsaw heart curled awkwardly out between the bra’s lace detailing. He could feel it constrict in his chest— an ugly spasm in reaction to the way it gapped against him.

Power’s hands snaked out from under his armpits. She was holding the breast pads. “Put them on,” she commanded.

Hell no, Denji screamed. Or, well, he thought he screamed. His voice wouldn’t cooperate. Instead, his hand moved, mechanical, to take them from her.

They were pretty much how he remembered the first time— silicone. Kind of squishy, except for an odd firmness in the middle. There was a sticky backing that probably helped keep them from falling off your chest. They also stank, since they lived up against Power’s sweaty unwashed body most of the time.

He raised them to his chest, and after a few moments of arranging, they were on, cool and sticky against his skin.

Power turned him again with one firm hand on his upper arm. Now, they were both facing the mirror— Denji in Power’s bra. Both shirtless. Both, somehow, with tits. She leaned against him and crossed her arms, smirking with satisfaction. “Now you see,” she declared. “We don’t look so different.”

She was wrong, obviously. Denji was taller than Power, and broader shouldered, and just— different. They looked different. Because they were two different people, obviously, but also because Denji wasn’t a chick. No way anyone would buy that he was just from some fake boobs.

But also, he couldn’t stop looking at them. Why? He knew they weren’t real, and also, they were on him. The usual reasons Denji wanted to be looking at tits couldn’t really apply. Especially when Power, who had actual tits, was standing next to him, naked from the waist up.

Of course, he’d already figured out he wasn’t interested in Power, so it made sense that he wasn’t looking at her— except nothing about this situation made sense at all. Especially that some noise, buzzing in the back of his skull constantly, had gone quiet. A feeling that he hadn’t even known was there was gone.

“You can keep them if you want, Denji,” Power said generously. “I only wear the bra because Aki makes me.”

Reality snapped back into place. Denji pushed her away, yanking off the bra. The boob pads unstuck from his body with only a little coaxing, and they fell to the floor with a mushy plap. “Fucking— keep your clothes on, Power!”

Denji ran from the bathroom without reclaiming his shirt, hiding in his room from both Power and whatever he had seen in the mirror. He’d have to come back for the shirt later— Aki always got onto them for leaving their clothes in the bathroom when they showered. But he wanted to be sure that Power would be gone. Power, and her stupid fake boobs, and whatever she’d done to him when she snapped that bra into place.

That night, Aki turned on an old cartoon while he cooked dinner— the sizzle of grease popping over the tinny background music and shouted dialogue. TV always mesmerized Power, although she complained if there wasn’t blood and gore. She still sat close to the screen, blocking the bottom half with the top of her head and horns.

Denji didn’t care about TV, really. It had been kind of novel at first, since his dad had sold the TV set when he was pretty young and they’d never had money for things like movies. But since he’d gotten to watch movies with Makima, watching grainy TV on Aki’s tiny television set had hardly been appealing. But he still watched, apathetic, until his stomach began to twist again.

The show was about some kid who got cursed, so that every time they got wet they’d change from a boy to a girl— or a girl to a boy. Denji wasn’t sure. It seemed pretty inconvenient, honestly. You probably couldn’t plan for being splashed with water in every situation, and the kid didn’t want everyone to know about it, so it just ended up being a lot of dumb shit about the kid managing all the different identities and what people thought he was— or she was. Denji could hardly keep up with his one life, so managing two seemed like a huge hassle.

So he didn’t know he felt so much envy, every time the dumb kid slipped into some water fountain or got dunked in a river. It didn’t make sense to want that. Nothing he was feeling made sense.

He took a shower after dinner. The hot water steamed over the mirror, leaving Denji alone with his thoughts, and the water, trickling over his back. His naked chest.

It was probably something wrong with his head. He knew that already, though—everyone had already made it clear that whatever Denji thought about anything was probably weird and fucked up. This was probably the same sort of thing. Whatever this was.

He rubbed his skin raw with soap and tried not to look down.

It was early in the morning when Denji couldn’t take it anymore.

Without understanding why, he crawled out of bed— over where Power was sprawled, taking up half the space in his bed, like she always ended up doing whenever she passed out there— and crept down the hall to Aki’s room.

When Makima had arranged for Denji to live with Aki, the door to Aki’s room had stayed solidly shut. He hadn’t been explicitly told to stay out, but Denji knew when not to sniff. And it wasn’t like he’d been especially compelled by whatever Aki got up to, so, whatever.

But then, Power had moved in too, along with her near-constant impulse to wreck most of Aki’s possessions and her cat that liked to sleep under Aki’s desk. Aki had waged an intense internal battle between wanting to make sure he could hear when Power was up to shit and wanting to keep at least an illusion of privacy. But at some point, he’d admitted defeat, and the door remained just slightly cracked, even when he was sleeping.

Then, after the Darkness Devil, Power would alternate between sleeping in Denji’s bed and Aki’s, so whatever privacy Aki had attempted to maintain had been thoroughly destroyed. He didn’t seem to care too much anymore anyway— even when it was Denji’s turn Aki always ended up ghosting down the hall to check on them, when he thought they were both asleep.

The light was off, and Denji was at least smart enough to feel bad about bugging Aki when he was definitely asleep, and when Denji should be too. He hovered in front of the door, hand half clenched over the knob, before finally reasoning that he’d known when he’d walked over here that Aki would be asleep, so he might as well follow through. He pulled the door open, and crept into the room.

Denji had seen Aki fall asleep on the couch enough times to know that he slept like the dead. It wasn’t something he understood— it seemed like a pretty big weakness for a devil hunter, if he was being honest. But at this point he at least knew the drill. In the dark, Denji hunted for Aki’s desk lamp, and clicked it on.

The warm yellow bulb cast dozy light over the room. Aki stayed stone still, body half curved on the bed in an uncomfortable contortion. Denji sat next to him, touching his shoulder. “Hey, Aki,” he said, voice a mutter, and felt his ears turn red.

On any other day, Aki would have remained asleep long enough for Denji to back out of this terrible idea. But as Denji hurriedly pulled his hand away, Aki’s nose wrinkled, and he slowly blinked awake. Denji’s shoulders sunk.

“Denji?” Aki’s voice was still thick with sleep, and even in the dim light he squinted like it hurt. “What’s going on? Did Power clog the toilet?”

“It’s not important,” Denji blurted. “Don’t let me bug you, actually.” He stood, planning to leave, but he couldn’t get his feet to unstick from the floor. Every attempt he made just rooted him more solidly in place.

Behind him, Aki’s gaze slowly focused on his back. “…Is everything okay?”

It was a weird sentence, from Aki. He knew it, too— there was something self conscious in the way the words formed, even through his fuzzy concern. But this whole moment was weird, and Denji figured if they both knew it he might as well take advantage of it. He glanced over his shoulder to look at Aki. “I was just, like,” he stalled, trying to find a way to word what was sitting in his chest. “Wanting to know what you thought of something I’ve been thinking about. It’s not important, but, you know…”

The lamp’s bulb was making a weird buzzing noise, filling the dead space between Denji’s fumbling sentences. Aki’s body hadn’t moved, but his eyebrows kept contracting, like if he furrowed them enough he could get to the point of Denji’s sentence. Finally, he said, words slow, “you want my advice.”

Super lame. It sounded so lame when Aki said it, in his weird, grown up way of talking about everything. “Yeah,” Denji said.

Aki looked at Denji. Looked at the alarm clock on his bedside table that was scheduled to go off in three hours (which Denji knew because whenever he couldn’t sleep he could hear Aki start to move at the same time every morning). Looked up, finally, at the ceiling, squinting into nothing. Then, he said, “okay.” And he sat up.

Before he could stop himself, Denji sat again on the bed. This time, Aki drew his legs up, making room for Denji. He waited expectantly for Denji to start talking.

“It’s just..” Denji was glad, suddenly, for the awkward configuration on the bed. Looking at Aki in the eye felt too intense. “You know. I was thinking about…” He took a breath, and said in a burst, “Aki, you’re gay, right?”

The silence suddenly got a lot thicker. Denji could feel the way Aki stared into the side of his head with a new, unwelcome intensity. When he talked, there was a beginning of an aggravated edge to his voice. “Did you wake me up at three in the morning to ask me why I’m gay?”

“No,” Denji said defensively. “It’s just— I’m trying to understand something, okay.”

“Why..” Aki stopped, and ran a hand over his face. He tried again, voice mechanically even. “Why do you think I’m gay?”

This, at least, was an easy one. “Your ears,” Denji said. And he pointed at Aki’s ear, where normally, black stud earrings would poke out from behind his bangs. “They’re both pierced, so like… One of them’s gotta be the gay one, right.”

Aki’s face was beginning to sour at his usual impressive rate. Unusually, though, he made an effort to contain it— to keep his bad mood from running off the edges of his face into the rest of the house. “We can unpack that later,” he said. “What’s your point?”

Denji wasn’t sure, was the thing. He wasn’t sure what his point was— only that there was this unknown thing lurking in the base of his stomach, something he didn’t know was good or not. He tilted his head back to look at the ceiling, like the answer was living up there. “It’s just��” He stopped. “You really don’t care about tits?”

There was a long silence, punctuated only by low buzz of Aki’s desk lamp. “You care about tits,” Aki said finally, “an unusual amount.”

“Fuck,” Denji said. He rubbed one arm over his eyes. “I know you think it’s stupid, okay. It’s...” He didn’t know. He didn’t know what it was.

Aki’s head tilted, just a little— the lamp shadowing the way he squinted at Denji. But then, he said, voice slow, ponderous: “are you thinking you don’t care about tits? And that…” He raised his eyebrow, leaving the connection for Denji to make.

“I’m not gay,” Denji said, voice definitive.

Aki didn’t argue this point. He nodded, willing to accept it without trouble. “But there’s something else about it that bothers you,” he said. “Like…” He paused, slowly feeling out his words. “That you think what you want about them— might not be normal?”

They were statements of fact, made carefully— Aki watching his reaction between every minute word. So Denji knew that he saw the way his shoulders shriveled, inching away from whatever Aki was arriving to. “I don’t wanna talk about this anymore,” he mumbled.

“Why not?”

Denji stared down at his hands. His hands, resting on his legs, and the curve of his stomach against his boxers. “When all those assassins were coming after me,” he said finally. “One of them said… That some things you’re just better not knowing about. So, maybe it’s one of those things.”

Aki considered. “I suppose that can be true in some cases,” he allowed. “But I’d rather know the truth, however painful. …And I don’t think it really is one of those things, this time.”

“So what do you think it is?” Denji challenged him, finally turning his head to look Aki in the eye. “You’ve got something in mind, right? You wouldn’t have said something like that otherwise.”

“Not really.”

Denji couldn’t make out Aki’s face clearly in the dark, so it was hard to tell if he was lying. “Yeah, right,” he said. And he looked away again.

It was a while before Aki responded. Before he said anything, he shifted to be sitting next to Denji— legs close together, the ghost of his empty sleeve batting against Denji’s arm. Denji chanced a look at him, out of the corner of his eyes, but Aki wasn’t meeting his eyes either. He was just looking at some point on the wall. Reflecting.

“Some things you might be better off knowing,” Aki said. “Some things maybe you shouldn’t. But I don’t think it’s wrong to want to get to know yourself better… Even if it’s uncomfortable in the meantime.”

“You do have something in mind,” Denji mumbled.

Aki paused again. “Only based off of what you told me,” he said, voice light. “What you asked me.”

Denji’s vision swam. He squeezed his eyes shut, insistent on blocking out whatever he was feeling, and however Aki was looking at him. “It really doesn’t matter,” he said again, because maybe if he kept saying it it would be true.

The bed creaked, and he felt the mattress rise underneath him as Aki stood. Denji dared to open his eyes to watch him move. Aki was turning to face Denji, so he could use his one remaining arm to push him down to the bed— gently, one hand firm on his shoulder. Denji didn’t fight. He let his body sag, until his head was resting against one of Aki’s lumpy pillows. His eyes kept prickling, so laying down was probably a bad idea. Whatever was burning behind his eyes only got worse the gentler Aki was.

But then, mercifully, Aki turned the lamp off, dropping them both into darkness. He went around to the far side of the bed, and laid next to Denji, a tiny sigh bursting out from behind his lips. Denji felt his throat click.

Aki’s arm cuffed around his head, almost cradling him in the crook of his elbow. “We don’t have to talk about it anymore, if you don’t want to,” he said. “It’s fine if it takes you time to figure it out.”

Denji wanted to protest more. To say that really, there was nothing to figure out, and that Denji was just making a big deal out of nothing. Power had said and done some weird Power shit, and that was all. He could get over it. But at this point, that felt even stupider. So Denji swallowed, and nodded. He didn’t trust his voice anymore, so Aki’s only answer would have to be the way the back of Denji’s neck shifted against his wrist.

Aki didn’t say anything else, only laid against him in the dark, a silent, still presence. Denji drew in breaths until his heart calmed, until he could trust himself to speak. “Should check on Power,” he muttered. “She still gets nightmares sometimes… ‘Specially if she wakes up alone.”

“Right,” Aki murmured. “I can go look— you don’t have to get up.”

“Nah,” Denji said, and he started to sit up.

Before he could get further than his elbows, though, a heavy, furry weight thudded into Denji’s chest. Meowy sank heavily against him, like a furry rock pinning him to the bed.

Denji swore, and in response, Power’s cat meowed in his face. “God, your breath stinks,” he muttered.

“What are you both doing in here?” The vague outline of Power’s body lingered in Aki’s doorway, like a horror movie monster. If a horror movie monster refused to eat vegetables or brush her teeth. “You left me alone, Denji.”

Denji grumbled, still trying to move the cat. “What’s it look like we’re doing? We’re sleeping. And you defeated the Darkness Devil, so it’s fine, right? Nothing bad’s gonna happen. You’re too tough.”

“Not important!” She stepped into the room and the bare sliver of moonlight coming through Aki’s balcony. It made her face white, almost gleaming with sweat. “I knew Meowy wouldn’t leave me for no reason. You two are too weak and pathetic to be left alone! Very good work, Meowy.” She crossed the room to crawl into bed next to them, pressing up against Denji in an insistent effort to fit.

Denji grumbled in protest, but there wasn’t any stopping her— in a matter of seconds she was insistently pretzeled next to him.

“Thanks for watching out for us, Power,” Aki murmured. “Good job.”

He was already falling back asleep. Which was really pretty annoying, because Aki’s bed really wasn’t big enough for the three of them. But if Denji wanted to move, he’d have to drag all of them with him and he just didn’t want to deal with that. So he sighed and wriggled over, making room for Power by jamming himself against Aki’s shoulder.

Meowy slid off his chest like a heavy ooze, landing between him and Power on the crook of his shoulder. Power curled happily around the cat, one arm catching around it to drape across Denji’s chest.

And then, they were asleep again, with just Denji awake. Watching the dawn light start to crawl across the ceiling.

Sometimes, when he was stuck on shit like this, he started to wonder if he had been better off when it was just him and Pochita. Even if he didn’t have money and food, it was less complicated. He didn’t have time to think about things like tits, because he was too busy trying to pay rent, and the bills, and feed him and Pochita. It was harder, but also way, way fucking easier.

Right now, though, it was okay. Denji could stand thinking a little more, if it was like this.

He let his eyes close. This time, he fell asleep.

#chainsaw man #csm #chainsaw man fic #denji chainsaw man #power chainsaw man #aki hayakawa #hayakawa aki

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thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness · 4 years ago

Text

KAORU PERSONAL INTERVIEW SPECIAL HEADBANG VOL.27 TRANSLATION 2/2

The ideal figure that the guitarist who leads the band as a leader got while struggling, and the reason for his unstoppable pursuit. “Without ‘BLUE BLOOD’ I wouldn’t really be who I am now” “After all, I’ve always liked dark and hopeless stuff, that kind of things” “I’m the type of person who wants to be affected by cd jackets and lyrics” "Sometimes I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere"

Notes before reading: This is the second part of the personal interview of Kaoru from the magazine Headbang Vol.27 released on 18th August 2020. The interview is 11 pages long and this part covers the last 5 pages. As Toshiya and Die’s interviews, 2nd part is focused on his roots as a guitarist.

You can get the magazine at Amazon Japan or CDJapan. Read Toshiya’s interview here Read Die’s interview here

Feel free to correct me if you spot any mistake or any confusing. Links or credits to this post when the content is reposted or captured in other SNS is appreciated :) ----- Text by: Yohsuke Hayakawa (First part here) “Without “BLUE BLOOD” I wouldn’t really be who I am now” -Then, the topic of the talk changes from here. I would like to ask you about the story behind the 20 albums that you selected regardless of era or reasons but, you chose 10 albums from Japan and 10 foreign albums.

K: Is that true? (laughs). It's a coincidence, but it was very difficult to narrow down when it came to choose again. So, I chose mainly the ones I listened to a lot before I started the band and when I started doing it. They are just albums that influenced me. -I have the impression that Japanese music was a kids who read WeROCK’s thing. K: Hahaha. Yes (laughs). -First of all…. COLOR's mini album "FOOLS! GET LUCKY !!" (1989) is also included. I have to ask about why you picked this one. K: Well, I really love it (laughs). Even though it was "X in the east, COLOR in the west"*, I was really into it, so I went to see their live performance. I like their punkish songs and they have many fast songs. At that time, if a song wasn’t fast, it was a “no” for me. I also liked ROSE ROSE. *(This makes reference to X Japan being from the Kanto region (East) and COLOR being from Kansai (West) as both band emerged around the same time.) -Then D'ERLANGER. DIR EN GREY participated in D'ERLANGER's tribute (announced in 2017 ‘D'ERLANGER TRIBUTE ALBUM ~ Stairway to Heaven~ "). Was the album "LA VIE EN ROSE" (1989) a shock for you?

K: That’s right, “LA VIE EN ROSE” too but also CIPHER (G) himself. Well, I think it was at ”BURNN! JAPAN”, CIPHER appeared in a solo photo on one page in colour.

-Oh, it’s a shot in which you can see him standing with a flashy Les Paul guitar. It was before kyo (D’ERLANGER vocalist) became a member. K: That’s right. I though “What on earth is this person?” After that, they were releasing a CD ("LA VIE EN ROSE") , so I made a I made a reservation right away.

-Also, a band you can't miss from those times is DEAD END. It never gets old because it’s respected across generations. K: I chose "Shambara" (1988), well, it's a masterpiece. Just listening to the opening song "EMBRYO BURNING" made me sick. When I first started listening to metal music, I was a bit reluctant but with DEAD END, the melody that MORRIE sung got me very quickly, I got into them without any resistance. I didn’t have the impression that DEAD END was so-called “metal”. Since I started playing in bands, I was overwhelmed by the seriousness of YOU’s guitar technique. - Next is ZI: KILL is "ROCKET" (1993). Initially, the dark positive punk style was strong but with that last album, their musicality expanded dramatically and there are even piano jazz songs. K: It’s an album that feels like something has been reached. I got into ZI:KILL since the early albums and after making their major debut, I got the impression that their albums got milder. However, when I listened to "ROCKET", it seemed like an insanely cool album. I still listen to it. -Including a horn in their arrangements was ground-breaking. K: Yes, at first I hated it! But somehow, I didn’t care about it at all. Still, TUSK (Vo) lyrics and the songs were addictive. It made a deep impression on me, that’s why I read ZI:KILL lyrics carefully as well.

-Do you care about the lyrics when it comes to Japanese artists? K: I check the booklets properly. After all, the lyrics reach my ears at the point in which the words make you feel something.

- And, needless to say, you also chose X's "BLUE BLOOD" (1989). At the Vol. 20 of this magazine, you chose it as a “metal album that changed your life”. So, as expected, if you choose an album from X japan, would be this one? K: Without this album, I wouldn't really be who I am now.

-You were influenced by everything, both the music and the guitar play….is that so? K: The guitar too, right? Well, it’s not at that level anymore.

-Ah, that’s not the level (laughs) K: I was just listening to it earnestly and thinking “amazing!”, it just something that I like, there is no particular reason (laughs).

“Western music (I listened to) was also greatly influenced by HIDE. That’s why everything it’s related to HIDE (laughs)”

- On the other hand, Tsuyoshi Nagabuchi and Cocco are also included. K: I've always liked Nagabuchi. Like "Tonbo" (1988), there was a tv drama about that. *(”Tonbo” (Dragonfly) was also a tv drama in which Tsuyoshi Nagabuchi played a member of a yakuza gang who is trapped in a violent existence.)

- Oh, after that was "Shabontama" (1991). K: I also like the movie "Orgel" (1989), I was really into Nagabuchi at that time. The "Showa" (1989) album I chose this time is the album that got me hooked. The masterpiece "Gekiai" which is my favourite song was recorded around that time.

-You liked Nagabuchi’s drama series. K: Yes, they are rather dark series. I don’t know much about the brighter/cheerful ones.

-The ones like "Family Game" (1983)? K: That's right. Those are not the ones that I prefer. After all, I’ve always liked dark and hopeless stuff, that kind of things. -(Laughs) However, the radical portrayal of Nagabuchi’s drama shocked your heart as a young boy. Probably such a drama couldn’t be made in this era. K: Yes, you can’t. There isn’t even a rebroadcast of these ones.

-Certainly. Also, I remember that Cocco was around in the scene at the same time than HIDE (g). K: Yes. When I listened to her album, it didn’t feel like I was listening to a Japanese cd. I felt like it was a western heavy band, so I got into it with that kind of image.

-I feel that foreign music, the alternative vibe is overall stronger, but do you like that? K: After all, HIDE’s influence in foreign music (I listened to) is huge. At that time, I was buying various magazines and looking for some more, I checked the names that appeared in HIDE’s articles and I’ve been listening to the ones I liked all the time.

- I have the impression that HIDE had a great influence on you listening to bands like Jane's Addiction at that time. What about Vanessa Paradis and Japan ( English new wave band)? K: That was also due to the influence of HIDE. That’s why almost everything is related to HIDE (laughs). Also, this album of hers (released in 1992, “Vanessa Paradis”) was produced by Lenny Kravitz, who liked to go to her lives. She's still good, but I especially like her early days, I'm attracted to that voice.

“I’m the type of person who wants to be affected by cd jackets and lyrics”

- So that's it. The only work related to HIDE that you chose was with X Japan but, what about his solo works? K: Well, of course I like his solo, but in my case, I like HIDE in X Japan the most.

-Other than that, I can tell that you like strong sounds, heavy riffs and industrial. K: That’s right. As I was always seeking fierce things, I came to like strong riffs such as Pantera and Ministry.

-What about the so-called European German metal? K: Especially at that time, it wasn’t my cup of tea (laughs) - Then, some of the foreign music you chose…. "Psalm 69: The Way To Succeed And The Way To Suck Eggs" (1992) by Ministry. This album was already mentioned in this magazine before as an important metal album for you. K: At that time, there was a foreign-related CD shop called WAVE at Umeda Loft in Osaka. I think that I found it there and listened to it. I was like “what the hell?”, so I bought it right away. I listened to it at home again. That night I went to a acquaintance’s house and I said “Listen to this!”, and I forced him to listen (laughs). -I can tell your excitement (laughs) K: Then I listened to all the other albums. Above all, I like this one the most. -And you also mentioned Nine Inch Nails. K: The first thing I heard from them was a single or something. At that time, I thought, "Wow, that's amazing," but when I listened to the songs on that album, I felt like I was listening to something I had never heard before. It's dark, but it sounds very aggressive. But it’s not like european music dark feeling.At that time, I wasn't sure if they were a band or not (laughs). -You wondered if it was a one-person band. K: That’s right. I was like “Is the same person doing everything?”, “Is he playing drums too?”. Everything was a mystery. Information was not available as soon as it does now, so I was wondering “Who is this person?”. I also wondered if the cd jacket had something to grasp, like it was a cd jacket that I didn’t really understand. Like the logo. It was all mysterious and addictive. I myself am the type who wants to be influenced/affected by cd jackets and lyrics, so I look at every corner. Everything up to the back of the wrapping. Then, when I looked at the back, I thought, "Isn't there anything attached?" (Laughs). -(Laughs)There are many things that are totally attractive, including elaborate art books. K: Yes. Especially for Nine Inch Nails, I went looking for some place that sell T-shirts of them. "Sometimes I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere" -Among these works, isn't there any in particular that has an easy-to-understand influence on the songs that you make with DIR EN GREY? K: Well, I don't know that . - Some of the works you chose this time have a strong melody…. For example, on a 2017 tour focused in “MACABRE" (2000), you played “Taijou no ao” for the first time in a while. I mentioned in this magazine before that "If you change the arrangement of a song to your current style, you can still play it ", but is there a desire to make a song with that kind of melody now? K: I don’t have a particular desire to do it. I think that it feels like something from that time, it’s an image that doesn’t make me feel excited now. -By the way, do you usually listen to music with melodies like that? K: I do, I do. Rather, I’ve been listening to pop music all the time lately. I am not listening noisy bands at all. -Noisy ones (laughs). K: Hahaha. -However, it's a little hard to think that you are going to make songs like that. K: Yeah, it doesn't happen very often sometimes, but there are times when I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere. So, when I tried to start to work on songs, one turns out like “this is what I have done”. But maybe then I think that it’s a little different from what I do with DIR EN GREY, so I have to mess with it, fix it or just store it. - Eh! Do you make that kind of songs? I would like to hear a song like that from you now. That’s why the melody of “Taijou no Ao” that I mentioned as an example is not only pop but also suffocating. Faintly scented lyrics. I wonder if that it’s your true self. K: That's right.The first thing that influenced me was the New Wave*. Pet Shop Boys and so, I liked that kinds of thing. That’s why there is a bit of that “kind of atmosphere” sometimes. It's not just pop. *(New wave is a broad music genre that encompasses numerous pop-oriented styles from the late 1970s and the 1980s) -There is also a sorrowful side. K: So, if I had to pick one, Europe is better in that than America. Well, when it comes to the songs I make, I’d like to make them more interesting, but I don’t feel like doing something that is off the point/wrong. -I have to ask you about the melody part now. K: If you have any concerns, I will answer them… - What if there is something clear for you like, “this song has this kind of image”? K: After that, Kyo has several ways to sing so I will combine them in my own way and propose new melodies. Like “I think in this way would be cool”. -Oh, that’s how you do it. In any case, now I'm looking forward to the day when I can listen to a new song again. Will the album be completed in 2021? K: That's right. -By the way, Kaoru-san's hard disk has already material for the new album…. K: Well, there's something for the album……there is, but it’s still not the whole thing at all (laughs).

#dir en grey #kaoru #translation #Headbang Vol 27 #interview

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kyotakumrau · 6 years ago

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MIND-V vol.13 sukekiyo interview

to infinity

sukekiyo = a super talented group led by Kyo from DIR EN GREY will release a new audio and video collection ‘INFINITUM’.

As at the time of the interview for our magazine they were just finishing the work on the new material, we would like to deliver you the words of the 5 members who will tell you about the real image of the band at the moment as we will touch upon the outline of new work.

We would like to let you feel through this interview the atmosphere perfectly overflowing with the creativity of sukekiyo - that functions purely as a band, not as a unit or a project.

original text: Yousuke Hayakawa

photos: Takao Ogata

hair and make up: Jun Yamaguchi (EKYQ)

translation: kyotaku

(if you notice any mistakes, typos and so on please let me know 😅)

I wonder if it will become an album that doesn’t get old, place where you want to find yourself again when requiring stimuli.

－ Having in mind that at present your new audio and video collection 'INFINITUM’ is in the production stage (*interview took place mid March), I’d like to discuss the latest band image. In an earlier interview you have said that 'in case of sukekiyo, we start from breaking first’, how about this time?

Kyo: This time as well there were songs like that. For example the case of 'アナタヨリウエ -anata yori ue-’, we were doing a cover of 'Gerbera’ for MUCC’s tribute album, we have removed MUCC’s component and remade the song in our own colour at the time. I don’t think you will get that from listening, but originally the start was there.

－ It’s a song that shows sukekiyo’s peculiarity!

YUCHI: But it’s not like we’re flipping tables in anger (laughing), I think that’s the idea as well, that this band can try and rewrite the structure of the song to such extend.

－ sukekiyo members need to have really great adapting skills. You have to feel fine even when being driven into a sadistic situation.

Takumi: Yeah, it’s all very sadistic (laughing).

Kyo: Everyone in sukekiyo is pretty flexible so it’s not like everything has to be done certain way. That’s why I think the experimentation is greater this time, having songs like '沙羅螺 -sharara-’ from when we just formed and we didn’t question any ideas (everything was okay).

Takumi: 'kisses’ is a song that we were coerced to start playing live and it was also coercibly completed (laughing).

YUCHI: It was a song that we didn’t even touch during the rehearsal, but we played it on the first day, right?

Kyo: While we were on the move [to the venue] I was listening to our songs and the demo version came on, and I ended up coercing them 'this song is good. Can’t we do it?’

－ As I thought, [in sukekiyo] you have to be tough to survive (laughing).

Kyo: It was the first time I wrote the song composition down and sang while looking at it during the performance. When the intro started 'oh, A melody here’ and so on.

Mika: At the rehearsal just before the concert I made very simple notes [about tempo] like '4’ or '8’.

utA: Aah, yeah I saw that! Things like that tend to stop later during the tour, but many interesting ideas come like that.

Takumi: A way too 'early’ premiere (laughing).

－ How would you describe your new work?

Kyo: I’m hoping it will become an album that doesn’t get old. That there’s nothing quite like that… something that’s hard to classify as one genre, something that doesn’t get old, something you can’t plan to create. Something where you want to find yourself again when requiring stimuli.

－ When you create high quality music or concerts it wouldn’t be surprising if there were some disagreements during the creative process, but in case of sukekiyo I don’t think there is a negative tense feeling.

Kyo: Even when when something totally different comes up the reaction is 'I see, there’s a view like this as well’… everyone is mature so while taking in the good parts we try 'why not inserting this too?’, there is no fighting.

YUCHI: That’s why there’s no strange reservation. Enjoying our own version like 'it’s okay, let’s do it’ we’re able to create daring arrangements. We’re always sharing the stimulus/excitement.

Mika: Yeah. When first submitting songs there’s always element of surprise, and when we make arrangements it’s like mysterious cosmos/space…

－ Cosmos!

Mika: Yup (laughing). When we are exchanging data files, sounds and their sections start to appear during brushing up work. I’d think 'woah… it has an incredible space/vibe’.

Kyo: It has, hasn’t it.

YUCHI: It will just suddenly appear.

Mika: It turns out very cool, makes you like it.

Kyo: Even now there are many times when I get surprised 'woah something like that came out?!’. It’s… it’s like when playing shogi (Japanese chess) - 'where should I move next?’

Mika: It’s like deciding the next move. But instead going sideways (laughing).

Takumi: Like 'woah, going there!?’

Kyo: And like 'huh, so going there is the only option’ (laughing).

utA: That is exactly what it is like.

－ Quite a thrilling offence and defense (laughing).

Kyo: True. And recently subtracting is quite hard.

Mika: Basically, we just want to add more instead.

Kyo: Suddenly I’d notice that there are too many sounds and I’d try to listen objectively like 'this shout is unnecessary’; the last work to remove [sound/parts] is unexpectedly tough.

－ It is unheard of that you would run out of ideas. Kyo, do you feel the weight of responsibility coming from the position of the leader?

Kyo: Nope, I don’t think I’m the leader. I’m leaving that role to Takumi (laughing).

Takumi: (laughing) but I only [take charge] of the production details.

Kyo: I just expand my antenna (to collect info/data), absorb various things and present it to everyone, I want the world to know more about each good part… I have more of a promotional role.

－ A promotional role! But at the same time there’s also a position of the producer.

Kyo: A producer… maybe a half-baked producer.

Everyone: Hahahaha!

Kyo: I just make suggestions through images like 'could we veil in more emotion here?’.

Takumi: I find it helpful that we get words like those as a hint on a regular basis. Then, upon members digesting it, we can bring good side from Kyo and have sukekiyo do something new. Also, I think that the points we were strangely self-conscious about at the time of band’s formation are gone. Kyo had an image built until that point, trying to do something different… we were conscious about various things like that, but Kyo said 'people involved [in either band] are different’, and one thing that has changed is the point when I thought it’s fine not to think too much about things like that.

Kyo: About since we’ve released ADORATIO everyone stopped being concerned about various things. I kept saying on various occasions that 'sukekiyo is a band’. So it can be said that finally in all aspects it became true, that every member is even. I think fans and people who come to our concerts understand this.

－ That is true.

YUCHI: It feels like the band is becoming better and better, including the atmosphere.

utA: Talking about the point of being even, at the very beginning of the band I was submitting various types of songs, but now I only bring songs from my field of expertise. It’s not that I hate pop style songs, we do have the style of songs from YUCHI or Takumi. But thanks to that I don’t have to do it, and from now on as well I’d like to continue creating mysterious dark songs for the rest of my life. Deep inside I’m a really really dark person (laughing).

Mika: (laughing) It’s true that we have freedom to have any ideas for songs and videos, we can solely pursue what we are enthusiastic about… thanks to that we can roll in an incredibly good direction.

－ That enthusiastic mindset to pursue things is also a must.

Mika: But there’s something warm there when doing so instead of desperation. It’s not like there are restrictions or we have to do it no matter what… but we do have to make it by the deadlines (laughing).

YUCHI: It doesn’t feel like a strange obligation.

Mika: It doesn’t. There’s still this soft feeling that was there when we just started the band. It’s soft but super intense.

Kyo: That 'soft’ part as well, everyone (other people) probably cut it down. If you do that a band would become too inflexible, it wouldn’t be fun, the relations between band member would be stiff/cold, but we want to avoid that.

－ That means you can expand the possibilities of the band.

Kyo: With that feeling, I think that sukekiyo’s ideal shape from the start of the band is continuing until present. Even as the band keeps changing that’s okay as long as everyone is enjoying themselves.

－ As we talked before, it’s about the shape a band should naturally have.

Kyo: Yes. Isn’t it usually impossible for everyone to just freely pursue what they like? I think my most important job is to have everyone focus on that part, and to introduce it to various people. I’m thinking every day about what to do to be able to tell more people about it.

－ That doesn’t sound like you would be a 'band that everyone would go for’.

Kyo: Yeah. I often hear that [as a band] we’re hard to approach, but it’s not like that. There’s just one thing - it’s best to come to our concerts wearing black clothes.

Everyone: Hahahaha!

Kyo: In the venue it will be quiet. So if anything I think it is easy for people who come for the first time. You just have to stand and keep looking at the stage, there are no special moves during songs and so on, so I think it is easy. There are no things like special timing to raise hands or sing together. There might be many deterrents like feeling alienated or that it’s hard to go as there are many regular fans (fans who go to all concerts). With sukekiyo it’s absolutely okay to ignore that. Just for the hall performances, please watch the concert staying seated.

－ It’s a conversation that awakens us to the truth…! There will be sukekiyo TOUR2019 FORTY where you can experience the performance, but I have to say that the simplicity of the tour title is unexpected and mysterious.

Kyo: That’s the number of added band members birthdays. At the moment we’re working on the album jacket, it also has a geometric pattern created by combined figures of the band members birthdays and so on. It came from wanting to include more of the band members potential. I would like you to look forward to the final release, including this part.

#sukekiyo #kyo #京 #匠 #未架 #takumi #mika #uta #mind v #interview #translation

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aidorism · 6 years ago

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Concerning Yamaguchi Maho

Alright, listen. Most people have probably already heard what’s going on with NGT48 at the moment but I still want to make sure I did everything I could to spread the word, because there’s almost nothing about it on here. I don’t follow the 48 groups as a whole, only certain members and honestly, I didn’t know who Yamaguchi Maho was before this incident but the issue of stalking, harassment and victim shaming doesn’t only affect the Idol scene in Japan, it’s a problem of society as a whole and it’s present worldwide. I followed this whole thing from pretty early on, thanks to the people on my twitter timeline who posted and retweeted about it. I’m trying to get everything in while keeping it easily understandable but if there’s any mistake or you think I missed something important, feel free to correct me.

Also I’ll tag this outside the 48G, because I’m guessing that if there are people who haven’t heard of this or don’t know what’s going on, they’re probably not invested in the 48G.

In early december, NGT48 member Yamaguchi Maho returned to her dorm after performing at the NGT theater. Right before entering her room, she was assaulted by two men who pushed her to the ground and tried to keep her quiet. Thankfully the commotion attracted other people’s (members’) attention and Maho was rescued. The police as well as NGT’s management was called and Maho was assured that the situation would be dealt with. She was put on a social media hiatus. After a month of nothing happening, Maho went on an unauthorized Showroom stream to address the incident. She talked about her frustration that nothing had been happening and how other NGT members were involved in this. She was cut off after a few minutes by management. The stone, however, was rolling.

So, here are the facts:

the dorm where Yamaguchi Maho lives is rented by NGT to host all members who aren’t originally from Niigata. They have since moved.

Other members of NGT told the men when Yamaguchi would be returning home. They also told them her parents’ address. (The official statement says that a member accidentally gave away this information to some fans on the street but I mean, come on)

The two men were arrested but released shortly after. They told the police that they just wanted to talk to Maho but the situation got out of hand.

Either the two men or management took away Maho’s phone. I’m not quite sure what happened here, I’ve seen conflicting reports on this.

The two men are J.P and Kitagawa Joe/Jou, long standing NGT fans who bring in a lot of money.

Maho and some other members have been complaining about certain members bringing boys into their rooms despite the no boyfriend rule.

J.P is a fan of hers.

A third man (known as Inapooh/ Inaoka Ryuunosuke) was involved in the attack but was not physically present when it happened. He’s known among 48/Sakamichi groups for selling members’ addresses and personal information. Since he’s also a big fan and contributes financially to the groups, nothing has been done about him. (Another very interesting thread on him)

Here’s the detailed timeline:

December 8th: Yamaguchi Maho arrives home from a theatre performance and is assaulted by two men. Police and Management are called. The men were released after 3 weeks.

After a month of nothing happening, Yamaguchi hosted a Showroom live on January 8th (videos), which was cut short by management. There are also now deleted tweets about the incident, I’m honestly not quite sure where in the timeline they take place but I think were posted right after the Showroom.

A day later, a magazine whose editor is affiliated with AKS (the agency managing NGT and I think all 48 group members?) released a report saying that there’s no connection between the men and NGT members. The police never confirmed this. As of January 18th the article has been removed.

Tano’s mysterious messages seemingly supports the suspicion of her involvement.

Yamaguchi appears on stage during NGT’s birthday live on January 10th and appologizes (translation) for the inconvenience she has caused. This is when it hit the international news. While she is apologizing, her attackers are sitting in a front row seat at the theatre, watching her bow to them.

AKS issues a statement containing a lot of bs saying they’ll be holding councelling sessions for all members (starting with Maho), issue an alarm system for all members and increase patrols near the dorm. It was also confirmed that other members were involved as well as a 3rd man (he wasn’t present when the physical attack happened though). They also announce that the three men have been banned from all NGT events.

Nakai Rika (who was suspected by Fans in the beginning but quickly dismissed), Tano Ayaka and Nishigata Marina deny their involvement.

Fans are calling for NGT’s manager Imamura Etsuro to resign. An online petition reaches over 30′000 signatures.

NGT is losing sponsors and commercial deals left and right.

A video surfaces showing one of the attackers mocking the Niigata police for not being strong enough to actually charge them

January 13th: NGT announces the immediate removal of Imamura as NGT’s manager. He’s not fired though, he’ll still be working with AKS. His replacement is Hayakawa Maiko (a woman!) and her vice is Okada Tsuyoshi

January 14th: The new management (who wasn’t even in effect when the incident took place) issues an apology about the poor handling of the situation in less than a day (reactions from the public are translated here)

Akimoto Yasushi releases a ‘statement’

NGT cancels upcoming concerts and events

Inapooh (the guy selling addresses) threatens revenge on NGT

A newspaper releases an article about NGT’s former Manager (the one before Imamura) and how she was harrassed and forced out of her position by these guys as well

Around January 16th/17th it was announced that NGT members living in the dorm where the attack happened have been moved to a different quarter.

International media are still picking up on the story, but this is mostly what happened so far. I tried to include as little speculation as possible to keep it easily understandable. If you’re interested in what the Japanese public has to say about the international attention, there are some translations here as well as a relationship chart (includes speculation!).

Here’s the speculation:

A lot of people are taking it as fact but is not officially confirmed that this was an attempted rape.

Tano Ayaka and Nishigata Marina are the members who gave up Maho’s personal information. This is not officially confirmed.

The two men were allegedly partying with those two members in one of the girls’ room and Kitagawa is supposedly Tano’s boyfriend.

Apparently the police expressed sympathy for the two men because they did it out of love (??)

AKS is not pressing charges against the two men, even though they acknoledged their assault and banned them from events.

Several celebrities started to speak out on the incident, even people involved with 48G or AKS (compilation)

Sashihara Rino addressed it in a tweet and on a TV-Show (rough translation about the segment) (to which a male comedian replied ‘Why don’t you use your body to make things right? You’re good it’).

Kashigawi Yuki who was standing next to Maho on stage apologizes as well

Nakamura Ayuka (NGT) apologizes

Shibata Aya (Ex-SKE) talks about the safety alarm

Muramoto Daisuke (AKBINGO host) talks about the poor handling of the incident by management

Kitahara Rie (Ex-AKB/SKE/NGT) thinks it’s wrong that Maho had to apologize

Masuda Yuka (Ex-AKB) talks about her own bad experiences with fans

Translation of the Japanese public’s reaction to how management handled the situation

Oomoto Honoka’s mother speaks about the situation. Honoka committed suicide after being harrassed and threatened by her management

Kawakami Akira (Stardust manager) tweets about protecting Momoiro Clover Z from such incidents

Murakami Rana (Ex-GEM) tweets about an attempted rape

Iikubo Haruna assures fans that things like this don’t happen in H!P

Niigata’s Governour releases a statement

#NGT48 #Yamaguchi Maho #山口真帆 #48G #sakamichi series #hello! project #Morning Musume #Japanese Idol #mine:text #momoclo #GEM #Avex

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caseysbell · 6 years ago

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Author Interview: Tom Johnson

S. I. Hayakawa once said, "It is not true that we have only one life to live; if we can read, we can live as many more lives and as many kinds of lives as we wish." One of Tom Johnson’s favorite quotes, he has certainly created many lives to live in his collection of published books. Tom who mostly writes fantasy, superhero, and mystery books took some time to answer some questions for Books to Read. 1. When did you know you wanted to write books? Tom: I’ve had the writing bug since about age 10 when I tried to write and draw a horror comic book story. In the early 1960s I was stationed with the US Army in France and working as desk sergeant for the MPs. While the units were on patrol, keeping the world safe from communism, I started creating characters and writing short action scenes, but now I was interested in jungle stories like Tarzan – I had recently discovered Edgar Rice Burrough. 2. What was your first book published? Give a brief synopsis. Tom: My first published book was a non-fiction in 1980 when I researched a popular hero character from the pulps, an early spy called Secret Agent X. But if you wish, let’s go back a bit. Remember those slow nights I tried to create fiction in France? Well, after a tour in the jungles of Vietnam in 1970 the writing bug wouldn’t leave me alone and I took some of those characters and plots I created in France and wrote two SF novels in pencil, Jur: A Story of Pre-Dawn Earth and Savage Land of Jur. I had the first story typed into manuscript and made copies and sent them to SF publishers. The rejection slips started coming in just as fast as I mailed them out. So I stuck the manuscripts in a drawer and concentrated on learning the writing craft. Through the 1970s I wrote articles for magazines, and newspaper columns, and it was during this time that my first book was published, the non-fiction research into Secret Agent X. 3. What inspired you to write the story? Tom: I had been collecting the pulp literature of the 1930s & ‘40s, and noticed that little was really known about some of the early magazine heroes of that period, and the magazines were still cheap and fairly easy to obtain, so I bought complete runs of most of the character pulps and started reading and researching them. My wife and I also started a hobby magazine called ECHOES in 1982 under our new imprint, FADING SHADOWS. ECHOES quickly picked up readers from the US, Canada, Europe, Africa, and Japan, and fans of the old pulp magazines began contributing articles and art. We published ECHOES for 22 years, ending in December 2004. In 1995, we had started fiction magazines also under the FADING SHADOWS imprint, and these also ran until December 2004, a run of nine years with new stories in the pulp tradition. I was also writing new stories during this period, and in 2002, after a suffered a stroke, I rewrote that first JUR novel with the help western author, James Reasoner, and submitted it again. It was finally accepted and the publisher wanted the second novel, and a third. After a lot of rewrites I was finally publishing those old plots I created in France so long ago. 4. What was your feeling the first time you held your first published book in your hands? Tom: Well, of course, I bought a lot of extra copies to give to all my family and friends. I had struggled to become a writer, and to finally see a book in my hand, whether the 1980 non-fiction on Secret Agent X, or the 2002 fiction novel, Jur: A Story of Pre-Dawn Earth, my dream had finally come through. 5. What is you latest book? Brief synopsis. Tom: Several more of my non-fiction research books were eventually published, as well as more novels, short story collections, and anthologie. My most recent fiction novel is The Man In The Black Fedora, which has been receiving some nice reviews. “Crime is on the rise in New York. Teams of professional thieves rob an art gallery and museum, while across town hoodlums murder elderly shop owners. From the chaos rises a new hero! His team will challenge the underworld for a reckoning.” 6. Are you working on anything now? Tom: I’m writing children stories right now. A Canadian publisher is preparing his 5th anthology, and I’ve been writing for his anthologies since Volume 3, with several stories per volume 7. What did you want to be “when you grow up” as a child? If it changes explained why your aspirations evolved. Tom: I wanted to be an entomologist while in high school, but a poor boy wasn’t going to college without money. I joined the Army for a couple of reasons, the first was to get away from ranch and farm life. My dad was a cowboy and wanted me to follow in his footsteps. The Army was a better choice for me than working a life as a cowboy. The Army put me in the MPs, and I liked Army life, and decided to make a career in the military, thus I never continued my schooling for entomology or paleontology (another deep love). However, I never lost my interest, either, and readers will find something about both entomology and dinosaurs in my books. 8. Anyone(s) who you contribute to you wanting to be a writer? Tom: The great writers of the pulp magazines, and that includes Edgar Rice Burroughs (Tarzan), Robert E. Howard (Conan), Lester Dent (Doc Savage), Walter B. Gibson (The Shadow), and the classics like Call of The Wild, White Fang, Treasure Island, etc. 9. What advice would you give someone who wants to publish their first book? Tom: Never give up. If you’ve got the writing bug, there is no hope for you, you are going to be a writer, so tough it out. You’ll make it. Look how long it took me. 10. With the knowledge you have now about publishing books what advice would you give yourself years back when you first started? Tom: Take writing courses. Learn the in-roads to writing, and read the genre you want to write. 11. Where can we find you and your books (website, email, social media, etc.) Tom: Website http://jur1.brinkster.net/index.html FADING SHADOWS http://fadingshadowsbooks.blogspot.com Amazon Page https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B008MM81CM Face Book https://www.facebook.com/tomginger.johnson

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