#having the opportunity to get one. she still doesn't.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Elrond and Haldir! They have to have fascinating thoughts on birdlife in middle earth, not to mention knowledge of plants! Plus Elrond is spoken of glowingly as a host and haldir I found charmingly earnest when reading the books! Ecology from an immortal perspective sounds grand. Also I'm always fascinated by Rivendell and Lothlorien.
Sam and Frodo sounded interesting too and possibly a tad more approachable but there's just less opportunity in life to talk to immortals so I must pass on their company, also I don't do partying like hobbits do which is a significant consideration.
Legolas and Gimli would have neat things to talk of I'm sure but I cannot match Gimli's poetry and dwarven secrecy with less known people is a thing etc. Not to mention Legolas is a bit hard to understand talking about trees to those around him in the books even if trees are great. So it doesn't sound unpleasant but also doesn't sound like how I'd want to spend my birthday.
Aragorn and Arwen I only briefly considered as I don't think I'd have much to actually say? Aragorn must have bird thoughts and Arwen must have some kind of craft etc I'd want to actually hear about in terms of what she's up to as the books limit our knowledge there... but those reasons are less compelling for selecting them as birthday company.
Eowyn and Eomer I just don't know enough about horses about to feel I could enjoy conversations with without feeling woefully underprepared (plus my memory in conversations just won't compare to theirs from a primarily oral culture so... I'm passing).
Merry and Pippin are great but I don't think I could match their energy when it comes birthday celebration potential (I am still not a hobbit or very outgoing).
I don't think I'd stand a chance getting a word in edgewise if Bilbo and Gandalf were talking and I'm not that keen on fireworks so not them even if they surely have the ability to just talk and keep going. They're also renowned for not giving straight answers and having a sense of humour- cryptic humour that's a little clever to unravel is not something I understand easily.
Galadriel makes intense eye contact and Celeborn appears rather disinterested in mortals on the whole so that's absolutely not worth it. Sounds like an uncomfortable time at least in part.
Boromir and Faramir tempted me because Boromir's notable lack of marriage pleases me as common ground and Faramir's own taking it slow on relationship levels is neat. Their company allowing for learning about Gondor as a place sounds fascinating! It'd be neat actually getting to see them in one place while alive and interacting too. But still sounds like a little bit of an awkward time given my own conversational tendencies.
Saruman and Grima sound like horrible company and I would, reasonably I think, fear for my wellbeing if I someone registered as more than a random nobody to them. Absolutely not, thank you, it would be a horrible birthday. There are points in the timeline they were probably (?) decent company but... just no, particularly the implied at once duo timings of either sabotaging rohan or, you know, scouring the shire...
in honour of turning 22 today i of course have to make it about lord of the rings
#the lord of the rings#jrr tolkien#the lord of the rings books minor spoilers#poll#meta#opinion#samwise gamgee#frodo baggins#legolas greenleaf#gimli son of gloin#boromir#faramir#aragorn#arwen evenstar#eowyn of rohan#eomer of rohan#meriadoc brandybuck#peregrin took#gandalf the grey#gandalf#gandalf the white#bilbo baggins#galadriel#celeborn#elrond peredhel#elrond half elven#haldir#anti saruman#anti wormtongue#my thoughts
298 notes
·
View notes
Text
First Impressions: Part two
Jessie Fleming x Reader
Summary: Okay, so maybe Jessie isn't as shallow or one-dimensional as you thought. You decided to give her a chance, but first impressions and long-standing reputations can be hard to simply forget about. Can you let your insecurities go and can she prove that she's serious about you?
Warnings: Smut. Edging. Cunnilingus. Fingering. Language.
A/N: Part two! The rehabilitation of Player Jessie lol. It's a bit long, but there is smut, I swear.
“Hey Beautiful. How’s your day going?”
You glanced up from your phone and bit back a smile. You idly glanced around the library, clearing your throat before resettling on your phone and typing out a reply.
“Texting me when you’re on the road? You must be bored.”
“Day’s going well. Just at the library right now.”
“What? Without me?! I feel betrayed jk”
“I’m not bored. Just missing my study buddy turned…girlfriend?”
Your posture straightened and your eyes narrowed as you read her message.
“Is that your way of asking me to be your girlfriend?”
"Yeah?"
"Lol why the question mark! You're either asking me out or you're not."
"I am."
"Wow."
"What?! What was wrong with that? Lol. I thought it was smooth."
"Your inexperience is showing, Fleming."
“Well that’s a first.”
You rolled your eyes. When you glanced back down you saw she was typing.
“You said you didn’t want casual. And we've had some great dates. And I don't want to seem too over-confident, but I think I've coaxed you along from tolerating me to perhaps even enjoying my company. Periodically lol. So, I’m just following through.”
You bit your lip and your cheeks ached from holding back a full blown smile. Your head buzzed as you reread her message.
If there was a theme in your dynamic, it was that you had to give a hard time. Even in this situation.
"Enjoying your company? Let's not get carried away, now. I mean, just because we text all day, have hot make-out sessions, say sweet, romantic things to each other and it took us an hour and a half to say 'goodnight' yesterday, doesn't mean anything. So presumptuous of you."
"Ugh. You're right. I've misread the signs. My bad."
"But seriously - you haven't answered. And I'm actually getting nervous. Come on, Y/L/N. You'll either be my girlfriend or you won't 😛"
You smirked. You appreciated how easily you two bantered and this was no exception.
A few weeks had passed since that night in the hallway. Things escalated quickly, honestly. Suddenly there was this emotional intimacy that was rapidly evolving between you two and it just felt so natural. And Jessie, despite everything you would've originally expected, had been sweet, authentic, and steady.
The opportunity to step away and stop yourself from catching feelings was long over. Dangerous territory? You were in the thick of it. If you were going to turn back, now was the time.
"Yes. I'll be your girlfriend."
"That just 1000% made my day. My week. Month. More!"
You rubbed your face in elated disbelief and typed out a reply.
"Well. If you keep it up, my feelings for you might progress from tolerating, to enjoying to...who knows."
"Shit. I honest to God want to turn around and come back. And I never want to miss camps."
"I seriously miss you."
Giddy. You felt fucking giddy and you couldn't believe it.
"I miss you too. Which is fucking crazy since I saw you less than 24 hours ago."
"Tell me about it lol."
"I'll be here when you get back."
“Better be lol. And until then. Don’t let some other nerdy athlete charm you.”
You audibly laughed, cutting it short as it sounded through the quiet space.
“Yeah. And you keep your little fan club at bay while you’re away, okay?”
“Easy. I’ll text you after we're done for the day, okay? Happy studying!”
You couldn’t believe what was going on. It was so unexpected that you still had to remind yourself of the events that took place to get here. It was the only way to reconcile the fact that you were sitting here texting with Jessie Fleming. Flirting with Jessie Fleming. Dating Jessie Fleming. Someone who was Bad News; the type to break your heart and leave you longing.
Yet, someone who you - maybe - had all wrong.
Someone you, in fact, very much, were swooning over.
-------
You were reading the slide on screen and listening to the professor when suddenly Jessie nudged you with her elbow.
She had her eyes trained forward but shifted her laptop, angling it towards you. A smirk began to tug at the corner of her mouth and she gave you a brief, cursory glance. You looked down at her screen to see she'd selected some text in her notes.
"You look amazing. Stop distracting me."
You nearly blew a raspberry, managing to suppress it into a vague scoff. You rolled your eyes as you faced forward once more, but felt a blush burning on your cheeks. You glanced back at her to see her smiling widely at you now. She returned her attention to her laptop and typed out a new sentence.
"You know you're beautiful. You don't need to be shy about it."
You shook your head affectionately and typed out a reply before turning your screen slightly towards her. Your posture stiffened as she placed a hand on the edge of your seat to lean in to read.
"You're out of control. And who's distracting who here, huh? lol"
She retracted her hand to start typing and you missed it immediately. When she was done typing you leaned over, placing a hand directly on her thigh as you read the message.
"You are distracting me. You = distracting and gorgeous."
You silently snickered with another shake of your head.
"Omfg. You're ridiculous."
She glanced down at your hand purposefully.
"Especially now."
You gave her a look somewhere between chiding and teasing. She shot you another smirk and typed further.
"Don't get me wrong. I like it."
"Care to go on a little adventure with me after class?"
You weren't going to say 'no'. She knew it. You knew it. And sure enough, after class she led you by the hand to another building across campus until you were in an abandoned stairwell. You assumed you were going to continue on elsewhere, but learned otherwise when she gently pushed you against the wall with a charming smile and a slow kiss.
You giggled into the kiss as you wrapped your arms around the back of her shoulders.
"You take me to the nicest places," you teased.
"Both our roommates are in, so privacy is a tough commodity to come by," she replied with a chuckle as she began to kiss her way down your neck. It took every effort not to gasp. "You look gorgeous all the time, but I especially love when you wear your hair up. I couldn't stop staring at your neck - all I could think about was kissing it."
Goosebumps erupted across your skin as her warm breath caressed you, her lips explored and you could feel just the slightest, teasing touch of her tongue on your neck.
While the emotional barriers you'd tried to put up had proven entirely fruitless and ineffective, you'd done a much better job of withholding physical boundaries.
Given your concerns going into this relationship, you'd told yourself that you wanted to very strongly establish an emotional foundation with Jessie before being physically intimate. So even though you would've probably already slept with someone by this point, and Jessie most certainly would've too, you'd never allowed the two of you to go further than a heavy and hot make-out session.
You wanted her to work for it. To earn it. And to your surprise, she didn't seem deterred in the least. She'd been respectful and patient. Well, mostly patient. You knew she was raring to go, but any time you pumped the brakes she backed off.
Your hands were running through her hair and you two were - consciously or not - rocking your hips against one another's as she kissed and lightly sucked on your neck and her hands began to inch under your top. Your core was throbbing with need already.
"What if someone comes by?" You managed to say, eyes falling shut at the sensations she was sending through your body.
"No one ever comes here. Don't worry," she responded easily.
Your eyes fluttered opened, a frown slowly forming across your forehead. The lightness and excitement that had been coursing through your veins a moment before was immediately replaced with a heavy pit in your stomach.
You pulled back, slowly dropping your hands away from her head to her waist and pushing gently. She extended her neck, working to keep her lips in contact with your neck before eventually relenting with a confused look and allowing herself to be pushed back.
"I should probably go," you said, tone admittedly a bit flat as you failed to hold eye contact with her while you smoothed out your clothes.
"Wh-huh?" She asked, blatantly puzzled by your change in demeanor. "What's wrong?"
You shook your head subtly and began to walk away. You were deeply tempted to not reply at all or to just deflect, but instead you replied with, "Look. I'm not going to be just some other girl you fuck in a stairwell between classes, okay?"
You had your back to her and were pushing the door open so you missed whatever physical reaction she had, but her perturbed, "Are you serious right now?" rang loud in your ears.
You continued to walk outside, her footsteps close behind you and you turned around folding your arms against yourself.
"Yeah. I am," you told her almost wearily. You could see the frustration on her face and she laughed in disbelief.
"What," you challenged. "Are you going to tell me you haven't brought other girls here? Made out with them there? Fucked them even?"
Despite her irritation, she averted her gaze, scoffing lightly and eventually offering an exaggerated shrug.
"And if I did?"
You shook your head, turning away slightly with a huff. She gave an empty laugh.
"Would you rather I lie? 'No, baby, you're the only one ever!'" She finished mockingly.
"What the fuck, Jess," you retorted, voice rising slightly as you narrowed your eyes at her. "You don't need to be an asshole about it." Your face felt hot with anger, but suddenly it shifted and you knew if you weren't careful you were going to start crying. "I just don't want to be treated the same as all the others." You scowled, pushing back further emotion, "If what you say is true and things are different with me."
She exhaled heavily, dropping her gaze and stretching out her fingers and opening her palms as a way to calm herself. She took a breath and lifted her head to meet your eyes once more, still speaking tersely, but calmer than you'd been.
"That's why I'm frustrated," she said. "You are very different and I feel very different about you. For you. And I do treat you differently! Do you think I was texting those girls all day? Telling them I miss them. Planning dates. Telling them all my hopes and fears; asking them about theirs? Bringing them to hang out with my friends? And I sure as shit didn't ask them to be my girlfriend."
A wave of guilt rushed over you. Okay, maybe you were still making a sweeping generalization, but you still felt the way you did.
"I'm sorry," you relented slightly, but went on. "I see what you're saying. And I'm trying. But I still can't help it sometimes. I-I don't know. I know you're not who I originally thought you were. But I guess a part of me is still scared. I," you paused, words getting caught in your throat, "I really like you, Jess. And - moments like this make me terrified that I'm just going to get left behind like one of your other girls."
Jessie sighed quietly, dropping her gaze once more as she kicked distractedly at the sidewalk. When she looked back up her eyes were sad, but you could still see the warmth behind them.
"I don't know what to do," she said helplessly. "I can't change the past. I want you to feel confident in us. In me. But I can't undo anything from before. I'm trying to be clear and direct about how important you are to me. I really like you too, and I just wish I knew how to get you to trust me."
You exhaled, your own frustration at your feelings seeping in. "It's not that I don't trust you. I mean, I guess that's hard to believe, but that's really not what's going on," you insisted. "And I understand that you can't change anything from the past. And you shouldn't have to. That's just something I need to get over. It's really just...I don't want to be the same as the other girls."
She watched you quietly as she contemplated. She took a couple of steps towards you, closing the gap and tentatively taking your hands in hers.
"I promise you you're not. And I understand that my reputation has made trust a bit more difficult. But, I really, really need you to know that this - and you - are special to me." She nodded as she continued. "You're right - I probably shouldn't have brought you to the same spot I brought other girls. Especially given," she looked away briefly, "what I'd do with them there. I can see now that was not the wisest. I really wasn't thinking that way - I just wanted to be alone with you and knew we could be there."
You sighed softly and removed your hands from hers to wrap them around her back, pulling her into a hug. She squeezed you tightly and kissed the side of your head.
"Thank you. I know you didn't mean anything negative. I just...I got in my head. But, yeah, if you can try to be more mindful of things like that, I'll work on not reacting so impulsively."
"Deal," she chuckled. She pulled back enough for you to see the way she cocked an eyebrow at you playfully. You weren't sure where she was going with this, but you were grateful for the sudden levity and the forgiveness it implied. "And for the record, it's not just all sunshine and rainbows on my end either, you know." She smirked at you and continued.
"Despite my bravado, there's a certain level of insecurity that comes with having the history I do and now meeting this incredible woman and wanting something serious and long-term with her. A no-strings-attached lifestyle is easy breezy - you don't get invested and you don't get hurt. But with you? I don't want to disappoint you. And you can definitely hurt me. I'm not used to that."
You searched her face as she finished speaking and warmth radiated throughout your chest. You kissed her and another wave of affection rushed through you as she squeezed you securely against her.
"I didn't mean to disrespect you at all. I'm really sorry," she said quietly as your kiss ended and she tucked her head against yours.
You pulled back to look at her. Her dark eyes were soft and shimmering and you laid a single kiss on her lips.
"Come with me," you said as you took her by the hand and led her back to the stairwell. You bit back a laugh at the curious smirk on her face as she allowed you to maneuver her against the wall. You smiled as her eyes slowly fell shut as you leaned in to kiss her.
"Guess this means you aren't too mad at me?" She muttered jokingly into the kiss. A crooked grin crossed your lips as you gently grasped her chin and had her meet your gaze.
"You're forgiven," you said with teasing benevolence before arching an eyebrow. "But don't push your luck." She chuckled and shook her head with a smile.
"I wouldn't dream of it."
You grinned as you engaged her a deep, slow kiss, this time your hands sneaking under her shirt and splaying out across her abs. A spark of satisfaction flared and you had to hold back a fuller smile as you felt her breath hitch and the faintest moan escaped her throat.
"I like you so much," you whispered as you began to trail kisses down her neck, noting the way her fingers dug into your waist.
"I like you a lot too," she said with a breathy laugh. You fought back a grin as you pressed your thigh between hers and ground up into her.
"Oh shit," she said, still breathless, another laugh in awe. You got the impression the tables weren't typically turned on her like this. You continued, your hand now toying with the button on her pants. She let out another soft moan. "Fuck, you're getting me so hot."
You smiled smugly as you nipped at her neck.
"Good," you said simply as you pulled back entirely, breaking off all contact and loving how her hands stretched out to follow you and only falling away as you stepped out of reach.
You saw the tiniest, cutest frown form across her forehead as her eyes fluttered open in confusion.
"Call me later?" You asked sweetly with a flirtatious shrug, already turning on your heel and heading for the door.
"Wait, what?" She called after you, her confusion evident in her voice.
You stepped through the door, but turned back to give her an innocent smile. She stared after you like a lost puppy. "We're even now. Call me later, baby."
She belatedly opened her mouth to speak, but you simply blew her a kiss and let the door fall shut.
And call you she did. In fact, when you woke up the next morning you had a text from her in the middle of the night.
"I can't even sleep because I'm still thinking about the stairwell. Nobody's ever made me feel like this. I feel like I'm drunk on you lol. I know that's stupid. But. I can't stop thinking about you."
-----------
You slung your bag over your shoulder and scrolled through your phone as you began to exit your class. You walked head down into the masses of students until someone brushed against your arm and fell into step with you.
"How was class?"
You frowned, puzzled momentarily until your brain caught up and a smile crossed your face at who it was.
"Well hello," you greeted as you gently pushed your shoulder into her, jostling her.
"Hey baby," she greeted with a winning smile as she held out a coffee for you.
"Now this is service," you teased as you took it.
"Only the best for my girl," she said with a wink.
"Is your class cancelled or something?" You asked, knowing her next class was in an entirely different building across campus.
"No, but my last one got out early. Thought I'd surprise you with a coffee," she said, obviously very pleased with herself.
"You're the sweetest," you said as you leaned over mid-step to kiss her cheek. She smiled.
"Don't tell anyone."
You rolled your eyes fondly. "Yeah, everyone thinks you're such a jerk."
"You did," she quipped.
"I didn't think you were a jerk," you responded haughtily. "Just a thoughtless womanizer," you chuckled.
"Oh, well thank you for clarifying," she replied dryly with an eye roll of her own as she laced her fingers with yours. "Well now that you know I'm not a total deviant, want to come out for drinks tonight? Mia's back so we're all getting together."
"Sure," you responded lightly as you gave her hand a squeeze.
"Okay, great," she said before leaning over and kissing your cheek before stepping away, walking backwards towards another hall. "See you tonight." She gave you another wink. "Don't miss me too much until then."
That evening you were in a crowded dorm room, solo cup in hand, the bass of some song underlining conversations throughout the space. Mia stood across from you.
"Glad I got a chance to chat with you more. I knew I had to get to know you better because you have got our girl swooning," she teased with a smirk.
"Oh my gosh, not at all," you dismissed though you averted your gaze and felt a blush coming on. Mia laughed heartily and cocked an eyebrow.
"No, no. I've never seen Jess like this before. She used to make fun of other girls for being all lovesick, but now she's even worse than them. Though don't tell her that," she laughed, "she thinks she's being all nonchalant and cool about it."
Your head buzzed with excitement over Mia's words. The extra validation cemented your growing confidence in how significant this connection really was to Jessie. You couldn't help but direct your gaze away from Mia in search of the girl in question. You caught her eye across the room and flashed a smile with a quick wink. You watched as she excused herself from her conversation and began to weave through the crowd.
"Hey, you good?" She asked quietly as she approached, laying a hand on your arm as she kissed your temple. You gave her a quiet smile, holding her gaze.
"Yeah, I'm good."
You didn't think you held her eye contact that long, but your attention and Jessie's was drawn towards Mia as she laughed. She shook her head in amusement.
"Okay, later lovebirds," she deadpanned as she held up her drink in a 'cheers' and walked away.
"I trust Mia was treating you well?" Jessie asked as her eyes followed Mia momentarily while chuckling.
"Of course," you replied with a cheeky grin. "She took great care of me."
"Hopefully not too great," she teased. Your jaw dropped, scandalized though you laughed.
"You're not serious. You. Jessie Fleming. Get jealous?" You asked, eyes bright with amusement as you felt a fluttering in your stomach.
Jessie made a face and laughed, though you could easily see the way her cheeks grew flush. She eventually shrugged.
"Hey, what can I say? I know my teammates are awesome and you're an incredible girl, you can have your pick."
You rolled your eyes. "You're being silly," you said as you gave her an affectionate smile. She held up her hands with charming smirk.
"Just saying. I'm not taking what we have for granted. You don't have to pick me."
You 'tsked' her, arms folded. "Well. I do," you replied, shoulder back and head held high. "So you can relax."
Jessie leaned in, placing a hand on your waist as she kissed your cheek. Her breath tickled your skin. "Well, consider me beyond pleased."
You held her gaze again. Suddenly, there were too many people around. You were overwhelmed with a need to be close to her. Alone with her.
"How's your night going?" You asked, spurring a curious frown from her.
"Fine? Good?" She answered with a soft laugh. "Yours?"
You shrugged lightly. "Nice." You cocked your head as you glanced away purposefully. "Could be better."
"Oh?" She asked. "How so?
You reached out and smoothed out the shoulder of her shirt before playing with the collar.
"It's just starting to feel a little crowded in here," you said with flippant lament. You sighed quietly, but in exaggeration as she processed your words. She cracked a smile.
"Yeah? Is that so?" She asked, chin tilting up slightly as she studied you. She glanced towards the door. "I mean, we could always go."
"Oh I wouldn't want to force you to leave," you relayed sweetly and she gave you a wicked grin.
"Yeah, you're really forcing my hand here," she said flatly. You looked her up and down with a smirk of your own.
"I can find some other things for your hand to do."
Her eyes grew wide for a moment and her mouth fell open at your brazen comment. She eventually closed her mouth, now giving you a less than subtle once over.
"It's not nice to tease," she warned.
"Who's teasing?" You asked innocently while locking eyes with her.
She puffed her cheeks out in an exhale, gaze flitting across the room with an appreciative shake of her head that left you holding back a smug smile. She reached out to lace her fingers with yours, her thumb teasing the palm of your hand.
"Well, are you going to let me take you home or what?" She whispered. You raised both eyebrows at her and clicked your tongue.
"I believe you'll be coming home with me," you retorted playfully. "If anyone's going to be burdened with the walk of shame, it's going to be you." You shrugged. "This time anyway."
She laughed, loud enough that it even attracted the attention of couple of people in adjacent conversations. She sniffed with a residual chuckle and nodded. "Sure. I'll shoulder that responsibility."
On the walk to your building she asked if you should stop at her room to grab, any, you know, supplies. You didn't break your pace at all and simply responded with, "No. I want you now."
She grinned like a Cheshire cat, placing a hand on the small of your back and increased her strides, pulling you along too. "Well then let's not waste any more time."
You'd texted your roommate on the way back and was grateful to see she'd vacated the premises by the time you stepped inside. You'd given her space many times, so it was her turn to return the favour.
You'd barely closed the door when a lighthearted yelp escaped your throat as Jessie spun you around and lifted you off the ground, pressing your back against the door. Her lips immediately latched onto your neck as your arms and legs wrapped around her.
"Fuck, you have no idea how much I've wanted you," she breathed into your neck as she nipped and sucked at the skin there harder than she'd ever done before and it immediately had your core pulsing.
Something between a gasp and a moan left your mouth as you ran one hand through her hair, pressing her mouth further against your neck and she moaned into you while digging her fingers harder into the underside of your thighs.
Both of you were too hungry to take your time, so it wasn't long before she carried you to the bed, lips still locked as she laid you down.
Your hands were under her shirt and she chuckled as she sat up and took it off, tossing it carelessly to the floor.
"Now you," she said with a lustful grin as her hands wandered below your shirt and pushed it upwards. You arched your back off the bed and she reached around to help support you while she peeled your shirt off with her other hand. She was still discarding the garment when she leaned down to begin laying teasing kisses down your chest to your bra. Her hand was on the clasp of your bra and you chuckled as she unclasped it with ease, drawing the straps down off of your shoulders with her teeth.
"Fuck, you're gorgeous," she said in awe as she sat back again to take in your half-naked image in the dim of the room.
A small cry left your lips as she dipped her head back down and drew one of your nipples into her mouth, her teeth grazing as she released it before latching on again and swirling her tongue around the hardened nipple. You set both hands on the back of her head, fingers partially digging into her scalp in appreciation as she attentively explored you.
She switched nipples and her hand caressed up the outside of your thigh and grabbed your ass through your jeans, kneading firmly and hungrily as she moaned into your breast.
You grasped her other hand and guided it between your bodies, your own hand undoing the button of your jeans.
“You’re sure?” She asked, pausing despite your invitation. You rolled your hips up into her waiting hand and continued to guide her.
She took over, unzipping and pushing her hand down towards your core. Her fingers pressed firmly across your folds through the fabric of your underwear. Your jaw fell as her fingers indirectly grazed your clit.
She moaned. "I can already feel how wet you are," she said in wonder and her tone assured you she was more than pleased by this.
She pushed your panties aside, her fingers caressing through your slick folds for the first time and you immediately groaned in pleasure and rolled your hips up into her eager hand.
"You feel so fucking amazing already," she said, head lolling to the side momentarily before she began kissing her way down your torso. You tried not to whine as she removed her hand long enough to remove your jeans.
"You're going to get sick of me telling you how gorgeous you are," she said as she nipped at your underwear, tugging them down teasingly with her teeth. She hooked her fingers into the band but you stopped her temporarily.
"I want your clothes off, too," you told her in a way that left no room for debate. She snickered before pushing herself up off of you and shimmying off her clothes.
"Anything for you," she joked as she returned her attention to you, her lips laying fleeting kisses along the crease between your thighs and core. You heard her chuckle as your legs grew restless, rubbing against the sheets. She reached up and rubbed teasing circles around your nub through your panties.
"Please," you said simply.
"Please what?" She asked innocently and you could hear the smile in her voice before her tongue made contact with your skin, eliciting a gasp out of you.
You writhed beneath her. Even though this was brand new territory for you two, you felt safe expressing yourself.
"I need you," you answered, trusting that it would be well received and not feeling embarrassed or self-conscious in your saying so.
You heard a satisfied grunt from her and you drew your legs back eager to help her remove your panties. You bit your lower lip at the tender kiss she planted on your hip bone.
She began to kiss her way down your mound and although you really just wanted her to fuck you, to feel her fingers inside of you, you figured you'd waited this long, might as well let her set the pace.
Her lips brushed along your folds as she settled herself between your legs and that was enough to send a pulse through your core, but you absolutely throbbed as her fingers dug into the tops of your thighs and she pulled herself closer with an eager moan.
You were honestly contemplating begging her to not tease you any longer when her tongue began to trail up and down between your folds, your back bucking off the bed at the sudden sensations coursing through you.
You heard a muffled laugh from between your legs but before you could protest she began lapping up juices that were surely dripping from your core. Despite your intentions your back arched once more and you gripped the sheets tightly in her hands.
"Don't worry, baby," she said, "I'll take good care of you."
You fleetingly considered scolding her for her bravado, but she flicked her tongue upwards and over your clit before latching onto it with her mouth and sucking in a rhythm that urged your hips to roll up into her face further.
You could feel her smiling into you and she was entirely undeterred by your bucking and moving, confidently and easily keeping her mouth centered on you wherever your body took you.
She sucked, licked, and nipped at you in such a skilled way you'd never experienced before. You'd thought you'd had good sex before; evidently you were wrong.
To top it off, the way she moaned and chased you up the bed with a blatant hunger made you feel wanted and desired in a way you'd never felt before either. The way she devoured you, muffled moans sending pleasurable vibrations through your core, head rocking into you and lapping at you as though you were the most delicious thing she'd had made you feel like she'd never wanted anything more.
And when she reached out and laced her fingers of one hand with yours? Your heart melted.
It was blissful in so many ways.
You hadn't even realized she'd removed her other hand from your thigh when you felt her tease your entrance with a finger. A shuddering moan fell from your lips as she gently dipped a digit inside. You threw your head back into the mattress, back arching all over again as she began slipping a second finger inside, stretching you out deliciously as she continued to flick her tongue across your clit.
Her fingers felt just as good inside of you as you'd imagined and before you knew it she was curling her fingers up against your g-spot. You let out a low moan and your hips began rocking against her with greater fervour. She gave your hand a squeeze and you just held on for dear life, clutching her hand as if it was the only anchor holding you here. You reached down with your free hand and gripped her hair, pulling another pleased noise from her.
The pressure building between your core reached a tipping point. You don't even know how many strokes she'd taken - not many at all - when your cries and whimpers got caught in your throat, mouth drawn into a silent 'o' as your hips began to jerk against her as the tension deep inside of you burst. Your sounds eventually caught up with you as several seconds later you finally mustered a cry as you were already well soaking her face.
She stayed with you the whole time, continuing to help you ride out your orgasm and slowing her motions as you gradually came down.
As you fell back into the bed, your limbs and entire body felt so heavy. It's not like you two had been at it for all that long, but you felt so spent. Even as she began to tenderly kiss her way up your body, you couldn't muster up the energy to caress or hold her. You couldn't even open your eyes.
"You are so incredibly beautiful," she whispered into your ear as she settled herself against you and wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close.
You still couldn't make a noise or embrace her, you simply let her pull you against her.
"You're incredible. And that was so amazing. I-," she paused. "You're so sexy. All of that is going to be engrained in my mind for a long, long time."
You let your head fall to the side and against hers. She chuckled and kissed your forehead and you became aware of how she was gently thumbing your shoulder as she held you.
"Fuck," you eventually said. You heard her hold back a laugh and you finally opened your eyes to look at her. Her eyes were bright and shimmering as she looked down at you. A lazy, crooked smile crossed your lips as you reached up and pushed her face away playfully. "You are way too pleased with yourself right now," you laughed.
"I'm not!" She protested though she laughed. "I'm just- I'm really happy," she eventually said.
"Yeah?" You chuckled as you pulled her closer and she gladly obliged. You tucked your head under her chin. "Well that makes two of us," you laughed and she kissed the top of your head. You sighed contentedly. "Well now I know what all the fuss is about."
Your eyes opened as you felt her stiffen slightly. She shifted, clearing her throat quietly.
"Hey," was all she said, probably meant to be teasing or warning, but sounding sad instead.
You pulled back to look at her. It was true, the bright, warm smile she'd worn was now faint as she looked back at you. You kissed her softly.
"I'm sorry. I thought it was a funny joke. Not appropriate," you said.
"I just want it to be about us," she said quietly as her gaze fell as she drew small, distracted designs on your collarbone with her finger.
"I know," you agreed in the same tone as you placed a hand on hers and caressed the back of it with your thumb. She kissed your cheek. "Me too. I just - you're good. Extraordinarily good. And, well, the fact fleeting crosses my mind that, you know, how do you get so good? Well, practice makes perfect. So..."
Jessie huffed inaudibly, but you felt the air tickle your skin.
"I know we talked about this," you rushed on. "And I'm not upset. Honestly." You chuckled, hoping to lighten things. "I mean, I'm reaping the benefits here." She cracked a faint smirk, but not exactly what you hoped to see. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."
"It's okay," she relented as she kissed your cheek once more with a soft sigh. "Just as long as you know you're the only one I want."
You nodded, but she must not have been convinced because she carried on.
"Because, if it was anyone else, I would've been down the stairs and out of the building by now. And," she punctuated, "-not that I should say anything- but, I typically don't get undressed. I'm not looking for intimacy or anything like that. But, I want that with you."
You held a hand up to her cheek and ran your thumb softly against her cheekbone.
"And? Do you have that with me?"
She nodded, leaning her head into your palm.
"Yeah. And it's," she trailed off, her gaze falling briefly as she smirked at herself. She looked up at you again. "It's really great."
You held her gaze and inhaled. Your head was swimming with all sorts of thoughts and feelings. A particular set of words sat on the tip of your tongue. She must've noticed.
"What?" She asked with a tender smile. You considered dismissing it, but instead you just gave a gentle shake of your head.
"I'm falling very hard for you, Jessie Fleming."
Her eyes lit up and you watched as she searched yours. In this moment, this woman who was all charm and confidence looked exceedingly vulnerable.
"That's not funny to joke about," she eventually said with a forced smirk and a single, faint laugh.
"Who says I'm joking?" You asked with a soft laugh.
Realization settled in her and she shifted so she was slightly more on top of you.
"Don't joke," she repeated. You held her gaze, laughing quietly again.
"I'm not."
She rolled you fully onto your back again so she was on top of you. Her knee nudged your legs apart and it any other reality you would've been embarrassed at how your core immediately throbbed.
She looked down at you, eyes different than any way you'd seen them before. Darker somehow. But it didn't scare you. It made you want her more.
"You're everything I wanted," she said. "And I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since that first day in class." She subtly began to rock against you and your hands began to wander along her back.
"Everybody told me what this was supposed to feel like, but it just never clicked for me before. At all. But," she took a short, stuttered breath as she continued to grind against you and her hand began to travel down your torso. "You have me. You're on my mind all the time. Any time I'm away from you, I'm just reliving past conversations and moment or dreaming up new ones."
She shook her head in mild disbelief. "I've never felt this way," she said as her hand settled between your legs. You were certain there was no way she couldn't feel the heat radiating off of you. And somehow, with every declaration from her you grew wetter and wetter.
"Me neither," you told her. She smiled and ran two fingers through your folds to then tease your entrance - immediately confirming how wet you were - her eyes lit up and her smile turned into a grin.
"You are so gorgeous. And so fucking amazing," she told you in reverie.
Your exhale was unsteady as your center throbbed in want. "Jess," you said; panted even. "I need you."
A sharp gasp escaped you as she slowly sunk two fingers inside of you. Your fingers dug into her skin at how amazing it felt to be filled up by her again. When you opened your eyes once more she was still watching you intently.
"You feel so fucking good," she said, a smirk tugging at her lips. "Mm," she glanced down, slowly drawing her fingers out until they rest at your entrance before pushing in again more swiftly. "So fucking tight."
"Jesus Christ," you said as your hands came to her arms and you clutched them while your head rolled back into the pillow.
"I want you cumming all over my fingers," she told you with quiet assuredness. "Not just tonight. Any and every fucking night you'll let me," she said as she tucked her head down and began to kiss your neck, drawing a shuddering whimper out of you.
"Oh Jess," you moaned as your hips ground into her waiting hand. A shiver ran through you as she breathed against your neck and nipped at you.
"My name sounds so good coming out of your mouth," she praised.
If you had any kind of witty quip, it was immediately extinguished as she began to pump fully and steadily in and out of your hot, wet tunnel. A heady moan worked its way up your throat as she curled her fingers inside of you like earlier, each stroke sending a pulse through you.
You wrapped your legs around her and she began to thrust into you, using her hips to push her fingers deeper and harder into you.
"You look so good underneath me. You're so beautiful," she said as she continued to fuck you and it wasn't long until you could feel your wetness dripping down you and onto the sheets.
You were never overly vocal in bed, especially given the dorm situation and neighbours. But the way her thumb teased your clit and the way her fingers filled you with each stroke, your voice resounded off of the walls of your dorm.
Soon you could feel your core tightening much as it did earlier. You clenched around her fingers as she panted above you. You didn't need to tell her you were close; she fucked you steadily, carrying you over the threshold. Your whole body stiffened, fingers digging sharply into her skin as she groaned in response as you began to convulse around her fingers.
"God, you are so gorgeous cumming in my arms like this," she declared as she continued to pump in and out of you, slowing only when you began to grow slack in her embrace.
"Holy fuck," you eventually panted. She was laying slow, tender kisses along your shoulder as she waited you out.
"Your roommate's not coming back tonight, is she?" She asked.
"No," you said and she cracked a salacious grin.
"Good."
-------
The next morning you awoke. You inadvertently groaned as you shifted. Your body was exhausted. The memories of last night flooded your mind and you glanced over only to see the space next to you unoccupied.
You sat up immediately and your eyes scanned the room for any evidence of Jessie. Her shoes were gone, her clothes. You sat up further as your heart began to thump loudly in your chest and confusion settled over you.
You shook your head with a frown. No. This didn't make sense. Not after everything.
You reached over to grab your phone. As you did, you spied a sticky note on your bedside table.
"I'm a morning person. What can I say! I'm getting us coffee and croissants. I'll be back soon. - J"
The lump in your throat immediately subsided and you released a breath you hadn't known you were holding. You opened your phone to see a text from her as well.
"Just in case you missed the note. I'm getting coffee and croissants. Be back soon, Beautiful."
You laid back on the bed, pulling the sheets up with you and letting out another sigh as your body relaxed once more.
Okay. This made much more sense. It wasn't all a lie.
A short while later you heard the door handle turn and the door was tentatively pushed open a crack. You found yourself smiling immediately as she tip-toed in, her straightening and smiling fully when she saw you were awake.
"Good morning," she greeted as she approached with said coffee and baked goods in hand.
"You're lucky, Fleming," you teased as you rolled onto your side as she set everything down. "I was about to lose it until I saw your note."
Jessie gave you a teasing look as she sat down on the edge of the bed. She spoke, unbothered, "Waking up next to a beautiful woman who I think is amazing? Yeah, I am lucky."
You chuckled as she kissed your forehead. "Well, I didn't get that luxury. Just a cold and lonely bed," you teased.
"I get antsy once I'm up. I didn't want to wake you," she explained. You pulled her in for a kiss.
"Fine. I forgive you."
Jessie smiled, returning your kiss. "Thank you. And, mmm, morning breath."
"Oh my God," you gasped, mortified as you swatted at her, only causing her to laugh. She leaned back in, pushing you down onto the bed with a kiss.
"Hey, I don't mind. I want you, morning breath and all," she chuckled.
"You better," you grumbled good-naturedly as she continued to kiss you. Her hand began to wander and you knew very well what she'd find.
"Mm, and it seems like you want me, too," she grinned. You chuckled, but rolled your hips into her hand.
"Coffee's not the only way to wake me up."
60 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay so the "fake out lujanne-lissa" scene/plot is egregious for a lot of reasons, but actually, my BIGGEST complaint with this one isn't even the hypocrisy, but rather what a MISSED OPPORTUNITY it was for a deeper, more complex exploration of the SIBLING dynamic between claudia and soren.
when terry says "i think there's one person who can put those pieces back together," and soren asks, "what are you getting at?" i was absolutely flabbergasted when he followed it up with "your mom," because i was completely, 100% expecting him to say soren.
terry's whole argument here is that everything claudia does, she does out of love for her family. why would he think of lissa OVER soren - lissa, who, as terry seems to know by now, hurt claudia so badly when she left, and who claudia hasn't seen in fifteen years? who claudia has barely even spoken of outside of talking to ezran about how hard it was for her being asked to choose between her parents? she talks to viren multiple times about doing things for "our family," but lissa ostensibly hasn't been a part of that family since claudia was very young.
the show even makes a point of drawing a parallel between soren and lissa in season three, when soren chooses to leave viren's side after his takeover of lux aurea, and claudia pleads with him "don't ask me to choose, soren - not again." and then refuses to say goodbye to him, because she can't bear accepting that her brother is leaving her. if the writers really wanted to go with the angle of "her love for her family is the only thing that can stop her" why not use soren instead - whom claudia clearly hasn't resolved her issues with, who's a much fresher example in her mind of being abandoned or left behind?? (AND with all the focus put on terry making them PROMISE not to hurt her, it feels like it was the perfect setup for soren to actually TALK to her, and for the story to explore their relationship in more complexity.)
i just feel like it would have made so much more sense for soren to be the one to try and stop claudia by genuinely connecting with her - a real attempt at reconciling with her and offering her a true path back, instead of the weird manipulative choice to try and trick her with an illusion of her mother (who, again, broke claudia's heart last time she saw her and has caused her emotional trauma that's stuck with her for years of her life. like????? UGH.) vs soren, who claudia clearly still loves - in the final scene with her, she still labels herself as his sister that he should love and be unwilling to kill, and refuses to kill him because she's "still herself" - inherently saying that he's still her brother, to her, and she doesn't want him dead, even when she already considers herself as being abandoned by him.
soren is, by now, the only living & present family that claudia has left. it just feels so much more intuitive and believable that he would be the only one who can connect with claudia where she is now and offer her a way back home.
#yes i am incredibly biased towards tragic siblings trope. im still fucking right about this#GIVE ME CLAUDIA ACCUSING HER BROTHER OF ABANDONING HER. GIVE ME SOREN PLEADING WITH HIS LITTLE SISTER TO COME BACK HOME.#you give me in depth exploration of these fucked up siblings and i will never ask for anything ever again im so serious 😭#mine#the dragon prince#tdp#tdp spoilers#the dragon prince spoilers#the dragon prince season 7#tdp season 7#tdp s7#tdp soren#soren tdp#soren the dragon prince#the dragon prince soren#claudia tdp#tdp claudia#the dragon prince claudia#claudia the dragon prince
69 notes
·
View notes
Note
🔥
kara danvers :)
ok well you and i have discussed this at length so this will not be new to you but imco (in my correct opinion) kara danvers [as portrayed by the cw's supergirl, not necessarily in other versions] is actually pretty lazy, and i would argue this is one of her most central and consistent character traits. and i don't just mean physically lazy, although i should note that per 3.17 "trinity" she canonically Hates Walking and doesn't understand why humans exercise. i mostly mean on an intellectual & moral level.
kara wants to be a reporter, but when she figures this out (because......a pretty lady told her she should do it? ig?), she does not apply to journalism school, or take online classes. instead she is handed a reporter job by her boss (who scrawled 'reporter' on her hilariously terrible resume when they met for reasons known only to her) and from then on proceeds to basically just do whatever she wants and get offended when more seasoned reporters who have gone to journalism school ask her to do basic functions of the job like Acquire Sources and Report On The Facts And Not Just Your Personal Opinions. at no point do we really see her ask her colleagues, even friendly ones like james, for advice or help; instead, advice is something that's imposed upon her by the wicked snapper, who dares to be unimpressed by her uneducated slay. throughout the show, on multiple occasions, the idea of actually Doing Her Job seems to offend her -- lena even calls her out for this explicitly in 3.02 "triggers," but she continues to display this behavior with andrea in s5 & s6. in the finale, when she is promoted to editor-in-chief in an act of blatant cronyism that truthfully should prompt the entire catco staff to quit in protest, it is not on her initiative, nor due to her efforts, nor is it because anything about the position has piqued her interest; it is, again, simply handed to her, and she just accepts.
additionally, we rarely see her express meaningful curiosity about, well, any subject, really -- we know she learned calculus young, but her interest in math and science seems nil; she is deeply naive about the u.s. justice system in s6 in a way that suggests she has never looked into it, though her own mother was a judge on krypton; and a lot of her interests seem very Basic (pizza, potstickers [? why girl.], nsync, the wizard of oz, harry potter), which to be clear is not inherently a sign of intellectual laziness or incuriosity, but it also does nothing to suggest that she is someone with a wide knowledge of food, literature, music, or film.
she also demonstrates what i would argue is a kind of moral laziness, though you could call it an offshoot of her intellectual laziness, in her general lack of real self-reflection about, like, any of her actions. although some of the other characters sometimes bring up how messed-up the DEO is (e.g. james in s1 with the gitmo comparison -- which, CRAZY line to put in your show and then never address, btw), kara herself does not question it (until the Wrong People take over, of course). her rhetoric in early s2 about daxamites suggests that she is quite comfortable believing sweeping generalizations she was taught as a child and has never really sat down to interrogate them, but while mon-el being.....pretty bad but i guess not as bad as his mom? yay? inspires her to stop being bigoted against daxamites specifically, we will later still hear her say that certain species tend to be peaceful or aggressive, etc., with no self-reflection. in 3.05 "damage," when morgan edge tries to make it seem like lena's lead dispersal device that kara activated poisoned children, kara does not take the opportunity to self-reflect on the choice she made and whether it was worth it; instead, her arc for the episode is reacting emotionally to her best buddy feeling guilty (about the thing kara also did. i cannot emphasize that part enough).
i would argue the conclusion she draws in 5.13, too, smacks of this moral laziness; she spends the episode looking for a magic shortcut to not having to feel bad anymore, and when she can't find one, she decides that actually, meh, there was never a perfect way for things to go down, so all that lying wasn't such a big deal and lena should just get over it. kara is dripping with a lot of guilt in 5A, but throughout both 5A and 5B there's very little actual, thoughtful self-reflection on what she did wrong and why, and that carries over into S6 when, after like ten episodes of lena (and also william ig) repeatedly trying to tell her not to play god, she decides in the very penultimate episode to solve her problems by eating the sun, and then when she decides against it partway through doing it, there's again very little self-reflection on her part of why the hell she thought that was a good thing to do. kara's morality, on the whole, seems largely based on (a) alex and (b) vibes, and not so much on any actual thought she's dedicated to the moral questions at hand.
and similarly to when kara is asked to Do Her Damn Job at her place of work -- when kara is challenged on her morality (like when lena challenges her on the kryptonite in s3, or on myriad in 5.17), she acts annoyed at the very idea of having to do the hard work of thinking about the morals she espouses as a superhero. and it doesn't read as someone who has thought very hard about her moral choices and is offended because she believes so strongly that she's right, because we never actually see her thinking hard about these moral choices she makes at all. it reads as someone who hasn't thought about it beyond a very cursory level and is frustrated that she's being asked to. because, again, she's just fundamentally kind of lazy.
and the thing is this might sound like i am dunking on her but actually i think this is a trait that is incredibly funny. my favorite portrayal of supergirl/kara danvers is the one from the children's cartoon dc super hero girls 2019, whose version of kara is ALSO lazy, on top of being an aggressive, quick-to-anger, rude, irresponsible, selfish brat. and she's hilarious in that show, she's one of my favorite characters. another favorite character of mine, also a children's cartoon character, is anne boonchuy from amphibia, whose entire character journey is about learning not to be physically, intellectually, or morally lazy and learning to [school principal voice] Apply Herself instead. it can be incredibly fun to watch characters be lazy and incurious and self-centered, whether they change for the better or not. but it is a bit strange that some people act like kara is this super disciplined person who loves working out and loves learning and reads widely and is curious about everything and self-reflects on her own decisions and how she affects others to the point of obsession. i wonder if part of it is 'femslash same-character syndrome,' where people slap other characters' traits from other popular femslash ships onto each other. because the character i just described is adora from she-ra. who a lot of people think is similar to kara. except no. she's not at all. as evidenced by this whole write-up ☝️ lol. they're just both blonde and for some reason (#blondephobia?) femslash fandoms wanna act like all blonde girlies are the same. but they are not. #wakeupamerica.....
#so anyway that's my extremely correct yet mysteriously unpopular opinion 😁 read it and weep.....#up up and away#sideguitars
68 notes
·
View notes
Note
And if I want snippets from all 3 WIPs?????
spike ily quite literally anything for you
and i still call home is the big bang sized preseries deanjohn fic nobody asked for. dean gets john to let him and sam stay in town while sam finishes school (and dean gets to play housewife!!). he doesn't exactly mention it's so sam can go to college, which ofc ends well (i'm lying 😈)
He rolled on his side and spread a nervous hand over John’s waist, and then moved down to feel the hard, thick length of him through his jeans. He had to bite back a groan, his own cock twitching valiantly at the thought of getting to see it, really see it, not just in casual passing the way you did when you lived with someone your whole life. But then John took his wrist, pushed him off. “It’s okay,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m good like this.” “But—” Bemused, Dean shifted sort of awkwardly. “It just… doesn’t seem all that fair to you.” John’s eyes narrowed, the line of his mouth going flat and mean. “Why don’t you let me worry about what’s fair to me?” Dean rolled onto his back again so he didn’t have to look at him, hot behind his ears. Maybe this was new for John—and that was admirable, really—but Dean didn’t remember a time when it wasn’t like this for him. The wanting was born somewhere between tucking him in and holding his hands steady around pistols and pool cues and watch out for Sammy, between dental floss stitches in motel bathrooms and it was never supposed to be like this and it’s okay, Dad and you really want to talk about Sam right now? Dean had been capable of this during all of it.
deanjohn dv screening ✨
“You know we’ve been here a couple of hours already, right? Costs an arm and a leg to park here, too.” “There’s a bit of a wait for the X-ray machine, unfortunately. We’re a smaller hospital.” The nurse was still pulling and turning Dean’s wrist, like there was some threshold of pain she had to put him in before she was allowed to give him some goddamned painkillers. “I promise we’ll get him in as soon as we can.” She raised her eyes to Dean’s for a moment, and he took the opportunity to give her an apologetic smile, the one reserved for civilians caught up in John’s wrath. She didn’t return it, mouth turning down into a frown for just a split second. Finally, she let Dean go, turning her attention on John. “Sir, would you mind stepping out for just one second? There’s a few more diagnostics we’d like to run on Dean.” John’s eyes narrowed infinitesimally, only noticeable if you knew to look for it. “I’m good here,” he said, planting his feet more firmly. Dean rolled his eyes. “It’s fine. Do whatever you have to do.” She studied Dean for a moment, and then nodded decisively. “Alright. Give me a few moments.” She wasn’t out of the room two seconds before John said, “The hell was that about?” Dean was busy trying to find a comfortable position to lay his wrist in his lap. “They think you’re beating me,” he snapped. He watched John’s face turn to stone. “And why the hell would they think that?” “Because you’re being an asshole.” Dean stopped to hiss as a twinge of shocky pain shot up his arm. “Look. If they try to get me alone again, just play along, alright? So we can get off their radar.”
deanjohn abo au is my s1 au deanjohn/samdean double feature, where sam figures out that dean let john claim him and goes absolutely bonkers over it
“You’re fucking deranged. You think you're defending my honor or something? Because I got news for you—ever since you found out, you’ve been stomping around, whining like a jealous bitch. Spineless too, like pretending this is about Dad makes it okay. There something you want from me, Sam? Speak up.” Sam didn’t, only pressed his arm harder across Dean’s throat when he tried to move again. Dean’s mouth curled into a nasty grin. “It’s driving you crazy, isn’t it? Thinking about him on top of me. His knot inside me. D’you think about me begging for it? ‘Cause I do, Sammy, I beg him to shove it so deep I can’t fucking breathe, to put me on my knees and fucking knock me up. Just curious—would you prefer a little brother or a sister?” “You don’t have to convince me you’re a fucking whore, Dean.” The last thing Dean remembered before the world tilted and went black was rearing back and spitting in Sam’s face.
#all three of these feature domestic violence i'm realizing i have a Thing oops#my fic#ty spike <333
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
so, it's some type of family themed retreat marked as a great opportunity for bonding, strengthening relationships and just fun for kids.
so attending, we have roman, samantha, jey, nicki, they bad ass kids, jimmy, naomi, and r-truth (nicki's brother in this au and a friend to the bloodline).
we also have solana, mira, marcus, bayely, alex, trick (alex husband), wes, wes wife (still gotta name her), and their kids.
so yes.....a lot of people.
and a large part of all these people going is mira's smart lil self using her tablet to call several of these family members and ask them attend this retreat. we're going to assume it's a few weeks ahead of time, thus giving people time to accommodate their schedule. because no one can say not to mira.
but also, it's very much "roman is going? well, i have to go too to make sure everything is okay" and "shit, marcus gon' be there? well, you know we gotta go to make sure big dog don't kill that man."
i also need ya'll to know it's very much gon be r-truth and/or jimmy saying stuff ahead of time like, "man, fuck him. what he do anyway? a doctor? boring. you got this, uce. go get back your woman" still not telling roman about this plan baby girl done came up with. only to meet marcus and be like, "man, you know what, he alright in my book. i like that dude! he smart as hell. roman, you need to stop tripping." 😭😭😭
and good lord, don't get me started on the lil activities and exercises during the retreat. exercises that the adults in on this lil reconciliation plan somehow always make sure roman and solana get paired up for. except, there's tension, and not the good kind, between roso that only keeps building/getting worse. so you can bet there some scene where it's roman, solana, and maybe jimmy in the middle of an exercises, but solana and roman are acting like damn children.
"jimmy, tell him i'm not the one acting like a child."
"roman, solana said---"
"big jim, tell her that me not agreeing with whatever she fucking wants doesn't make me a child."
"soso, roman said---"
"jimmy, tell roman that just because everyone else bends over for him doesn't mean that i will---"
"ayo, big dog, she said---"
"she didn't mind bending over when we made mira."
a mess.
and don't get me started on r-truth ass.
"ayo, ya'll. i'll be back. i gotta interview here for a job as a counselor."
"a counselor? you? how the hell did that happen?"
"man, idk, they said they liked me, and i told them i have my ph.d---"
"wait, you told them what?"
"that i got my ph.d"
"truth, you have a ged!"
"ain't that the same thing?"
"no!"
"forreal? that's---that's on me. that's my bad."
wait. hear me out.
instead of the kidnapping plot......
solana is with marcus, roman gets a girlfriend finally (don't hate me), and mira asks if they can go on a family vacation, cause maybe one of her lil friends told her about them, and lil ms. mira is scheming, thinking her mommy and daddy will fall in love again on the trip, and they can be a big, happy family.
not realizing daddy's new girlfriend, sam, and mommy's boyfriend, marcus, are also tagging along, because roso are trying to see how this "blended family" thing works. let's say roman is now at the point where the elders are pressuring him to settle down and produce a male heir, sam isn't awful in this, and she's available, so he's trying.
but also jimmy, jey, naomi, and bayley are there, so there's already going to be shenanigans, cause these four are also in cahoots with mirabel to reunite roso. well, not jey, he said keep me out that shit 😂😂😂 meanwhile jimmy holding up his phone playing careless whisper in front of the room roso are sharing for sake of mira (separate beds).
and by the end of the two week trip, roman and solana realize something just might still be there.....along with a ton of drama, angst, hilarious ass moments along the way.
35 notes
·
View notes
Note
Is Elliot trans?? I saw on a post that it said "pre transition elliot" and that got me curious to whether it was about gender or some magical thing I missed knowing
Technically both heehee.
Yeah he's a trans dude. Him being trans doesn't have anything to do with magic, but the way he physically chose to transition was via magic :3
#that's what that necklace he wears is btw#i dont really have a name for it but it's just like. a change rune of sorts.#as long as it's on the body#it alters the body to what the rune is atuned towards#lauren made it for him#it's also what holly's host has. that star strap on her arm.#it's definitely more of a privileged thing to have because you have to know a magic user#which means being fortunate enough to live in a magic-using area of the world#hence why april and other trans characters don't have them#well. also because it's more of a choice thing#april's happy with how her body is and doesn't care to change. for example.#but even coming across lauren rachel and elliot all as magic users#having the opportunity to get one. she still doesn't.#well. elliot isn't knowledgeable enough to make one. butttt still.#sorry rabbit trail as always lmao#brambleramble
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
I said I wasn't going to get started on the topic of Aveline ruining Carver's chances with the guard but I lied okay, it's Carver Hawke defense hours.
Here's the thing; it doesn't matter if you believe Carver was or wasn't fit for the guard. That's a different debate that I'll get to. What matters is Aveline's in no position to tell the guard not to accept his application. Why does she think that's her right to judge whether or not he's fit?
Carver should've had the chance to prove himself one way or another. If it turns out he's not a good fit, then let him fail. Let him learn from it.
"Oh but failure could mean lost lives-"
Aveline doesn't get to talk shit about failure and the people. Plenty have died on her watch yet she still believes she's a good guard and Guard-Captain.
"maybe Aveline's protecting him, Carver could die while on patrol-"
Carver could die working in the Bone Pit, or serving as a templar, or when he's running around with Hawke. Carver could trip and fall down a set of stairs and die. In fact, he can die in the Deep Roads, somewhere he wouldn't have to go if the Hawke's weren't desperate.
Either Carver fails as a guard, or more likely, he succeeds and proves himself worthy of it.
But let's be real, Carver probably kept getting rejected due to being a Fereldan with a past of smuggling/mercenary work and Aveline only reaffirmed the decision, either because they asked her what she thought or she stuck her nose in unprompted.
But what irritates me is that she admits to telling them not to accept his application, and then has the balls to call Carver too proud to take up a trade or find another line of work.
Carver tells her, "And who would take on a Fereldan apprentice? Maybe in another year I could work my way up to pissboy." He has a good point here. Aside from the guard, the only other place Carver could work and use his skillset is with the Templars. Or go back to mercenary/smuggling work.
And Aveline doesn't even have a real answer for him. No suggestions, no encouragement, nothing. Just "Fine, let's crawl down some holes. Good bloody luck for your sake."
Also, if you do the Mark of the Assassin DLC in Act 1-
Aveline: You should see if any of the noblemen are looking for new men-at-arms. Carver: Are you trying to get rid of me? Aveline: It's a role with some autonomy. A good fit with your training and... tendencies. Carver: After serving King Cailan? You want me to suffer some poncy git who needs two servants to wipe his own ass? I'll find my own way, thanks. Aveline: I wish you would.
You wish he would?? Aveline, he was trying to find his way into the guard, a position he'd make a good fit for, and you helped deny him of it because YOU didn't think he would be good enough, I just-
If I haven't made it clear yet, I firmly believe that Carver would've made a great guard. He wants to help people, to be a protector. He's loyal, and despite what Aveline claims, he can follow orders and take his duty seriously. We see him do incredibly well with the Grey Wardens, after all. If he were a guard, he wouldn't have to go down into the Deep Roads with Hawke, and I think he would've been okay with that! He's so hurt and bitter when you leave him behind because that effectively tells him, "I don't need you." Carver's spent the whole first act telling you he wants to go on the expedition aka that he wants to be needed.
But if he were a guard, he would be needed elsewhere. He'd be in training as a recruit. He'd look after Leandra while you go. He wouldn't be backed into a corner with no income and only the templars left as his chance at forging his own path and providing for his family.
He doesn't get that opportunity, though.
By the way, if he becomes a warden, you can get this banter:
Aveline: I'm glad you found a place with the Wardens. Carver: Well, it's not the city guard, but it'll do. Aveline: Carver... it wasn't the place for you. Carver: No, it's all right. It is. It cost a lot, but I get it. I really was a bit of a tit those days, wasn't I? Aveline: Well...
This banter makes me want to scream.
Aveline's just... she's so insistent that she's right. She's someone who will double down rather than entertain the idea that she's wrong and it's not just with Carver and the guard, it's with everything. The "my beef with Aveline" list gets longer and longer every time I replay da2, I swear.
Say what you will about Carver, whether you think he would've been a good fit or if Aveline's right and it wasn't for him, he was denied a chance and it cost him so much in the end. He either dies, or he joins the templars where he deals with Chantry's bullshit trying to brainwash him with "mages aren't people" and "magic is a cancer in this world", or he's infected with the blight and becomes a Grey Warden, forced to serve the rest of his life fighting darkspawn, tormented by voices and nightmares.
I will never not be bitter about this.
#dragon age 2#da2#dragon age#carver hawke#aveline vallen#aveline critical#oh and also forever bitter that hawke doesn't have the option to talk to aveline about this#because listen my hawke would be on this#carver would be annoyed and all 'i don't need your help >:[' but that's not gonna stop ed from turning on Big Brother Mode#this is just one of many reasons i can't do the friendship path with aveline#i hate the thought of doing rivalries for all my other companions but i feel like aveline's rivalry route is the only chance to shake her#of her unwarranted over confidence and make her realize that she's not this lawful good 'i stand for all of us' guard captain#she still stands with me in the end but at that point i wouldn't be surprised if she was just doing to because she still feels she owes ed#for getting her outta fereldan and into kirkwall rather than because we're loyal best friends y'know?#she's certainly not doing it for the mage rights#but anyway i never miss an opportunity to defend carver#that's my baby brother and i love him
912 notes
·
View notes
Text
Noticing that TV and film will often have a character either have had an abortion in the past that isn't showcased on screen (and just used as part of the character's ~fucked up and twisted backstory~) OR contemplate getting an abortion in the present day but not to through with it. Just once I want to see someone delete that fetus within the events of the plot and not be like. Extremely majorly punished for it and/or be in the wrong
#ramblings of a lunatic#was watching a tv show w the fam recently and it's the 2nd series of a show that was clearly written with only 1 in mind#so in the 2nd season a character gets pregnant (bc ofc) and contemplates getting an abortion#only to do the whole 'omg she thinks she's lost the baby and realizes she wanted to keep it all along!'#which like. fine and valid and happens to ppl irl I'm sure#but like. this season doesn't establish if she wanted kids prior or if she has a stable job (she was struggling career wise-#-last season and the timeskip this season doesn't go into it)#AND has this fucking bizarre scene w/ her boyfriend (whos mostly been irrelevant and occasionally annoying up til now)#where he says it's 'our pregnancy' that she was going to terminate and when she (rightfully) bites back-#-saying 'you mean MY pregnancy?!' he just. storms off and deflects#which would be one thing but we have to wrap up the main plot so she just apologizes to him (for other plot stuff)#and we're never given any indication that his opinion has changed and they're just happily parenting at the end of the season#which just. left a bad taste in my mouth#like I KNOW i know not every bad thing said on screen needs a big blinking arrow that points out that it's Bad and Wrong#but idk how I'm supposed to feel in a series that has painted itself as explicitly feminist up til this point#presents the outcome of a woman dating and bearing a child for a man w seemingly zero respect for her bodily autonomy as happily ever after#w no follow up#like the whole series is centered on a group of sisters and this pregnancy story happened to the youngest one#who's always seen as needing to 'grow up' in season 1. so assuming this is meant to be building off that arc it's so WEIRD still#bc yes being a parent is an opportunity for many ppl to mature emotionally but that's not really something the character-#-reflects on all season. it's more abt her burying her past relationship w a season 1 guy (who was infinitely more interesting than new guy)#-than anything to do with that#AND EVEN IF IT WAS the notion of pregnancy as a punishment/reckoning meant to make her grow up or take responsibility-#-which is secretly a blessing in disguise i. god the show fell apart so hard here for me#and my mom and sister were just cooing over the baby at the end and i didn't speak up bc i didn't want to be a bitch#and in all fairness I'm probably being a tad uncharitable in this post but like. don't piss me OFF man#anyway. normalise abortion storylines that aren't backstory fodder and aren't fakeouts for baby plots. please
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok time to post some of this. cracks dick. part one of crackship analyiss. under the cut becasue it is GODDAMN LONG. made these a few days ago but never posted them
(jic this is in a “theyre all in separate bodies, probably but not neccesarily outside of the construct, and theyre just like chillin)
(from @lady12maiden)
This one is actually rather feasible to me, i guess it helps that the thorn is rather close to the beast/den by nature, even if you can’t get hunted in Thorn. That aside, I think it would be a very quiet and slow romance. Thorn would likely be the first to initiate something resembling a friendship with Hunt through a shared situation, whether it be an actual dangerous predicament or like. They’re both gardening at the same time.
Alternatively, I think Hunted seeing her with. Ya know. Several Open Wounds all over her might cause him to initiate first with the intention of making sure she doesn’t bleed out before they can heal. Either way, for a long time, they probably describe their relationship as something close to allies. I imagine they’d either be the first to realise they feel that way for eachother, and then just not tell Anyone Ever. It’s not even like they’re keeping it a secret, it just doesn’t occur to them. Between the two of them, though? I think Hunted would catch feelings first, but Thorn would actually realise her feelings first.
When they’re actually together, though? I feel like they’d go to eachother first for anything. Need help making the bed/nest? Thorn gets called first. A scar reopened? Hunted’s the first one she goes to. Opportunist’s up to shit again? They’re discussing it in their little den. (Pun not intended.) Thorn would probably appreciate that hunted’s up-front when it matters, and hunted would appreciate The fact that she’s more calm, less loud and high-energy than some of the others (like, say, adversary or stubborn,) and her likely sharing some of his creature-ish instincts makes it easier for them to relate in general.
Ooh, this is a fun one, it didn’t take long for me to think of a fun arc for them.. Stubborn probably wanted to throw himself at den endlessly, but outside of the construct, she’s probably not interested in combat that doesn't have the end goal of sustenance, and not only is stubborn sapient and also just a Guy She Knows, he’s also too muscly to really taste good. So any attempts to fight her don’t really end in much. But this isn’t about Den and stubborn, so the end goal is that he ends up fighting beast instead. Slightly smaller big monster princess is still a big monster princess!
Beast doesn’t appreciate Stubborn’s attempts as much, either, due to how easy it is to begin with.) though she’ll still take the opportunity to tear into him. Eventually, though, she starts finding more and more enjoyment in her cat-and-angryass-mouse game as he starts becoming a more and more rewarding hunt; getting stronger, more adapted to her, and taking longer and longer to kill.
As soon as Beast starts taking him more seriously, Stubborn gets a rush of adrenaline. And as soon as he manages to properly take her down, a feat that proves harder than even the Adversary, that rush is even bigger. Eventually, they garner a sort of mutual respect for eachother… Which, for these two, means (b)eating the shit out eachother senseless every tuesday. Adversary joins in often i imagine.
But yeah uhh. To summarize beast x stubborn is lion x pumpkin full of meat that willingly threw itself into her enclosure have a good day <3 also yes this is romance to them
actually wait im bored
stp fans give me a niche/made up on the spot slay the princess ship (preferably in asks/replies) and in the morning I'll try and figure out how it would work. voice x voice, voice x vessel, vessel x vessel (hell even narry x voice) r all fair game along with polyships but i might not do more than an ot4,
#crackship analysis#baneful rambles#stp#slay the princess#thorn stp#voice of the hunted#stp voice of the hunted#the thorn slay the princess#voice of the stubborn#stp voice of the stubborn#beast stp#the beast slay the princess#vothunted#votstubborn
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.”
-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)
#historicwomendaily#leonor of navarre#15th century#Navarrese history#my post#I mean...the crime can't be explicitly 'proven' but Leonor DID have the means motive and opportunity; she had the most to gain;#the timing was incredibly convenient for her; and most contemporaries believed she was responsible.#She *did* ultimately act against her brother [Carlos] and sister [Blanca]#Though of course the fact remains that:#1) The final responsibility lies with Juan the Faithless: he was the King; the one in power; and the one who rejected Navarre's succession#Blanca herself - while criticizing Leonor and Gaston - placed the ultimate blame on their father as her 'principal...destructor'#All three siblings were reacting to an unconventional disruption in the system caused by Juan & their actions should be judged accordingly.#2) I am hesitant to believe accusations of 'poison' as a cause of murder given how that was commonly used to slander controversial women#and given how it contributed to the dichotomy of Blanca as a tragic beautiful heroine and Leonor as her scheming ambitious sister#3) Even if Leonor DID commit the crime (imo she was at the very least complicit in it) she is still worthy of a reassessment.#I don't think it's fair for it to define her entire identity#Because it certainly did not define her life - she lived for decades before and would live for decades after#It was on the whole one of the many series of obstacles and challenges she had to face before she succeeded in ascending the throne.#The fact that she died so soon after IS ironic but it is in equal parts tragic. And we don't know what Leonor herself felt about it:#Did she think it was a hollow victory? Or did she feel nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre? We'll never know.#Whatever the case: given her circumstances the fact that she survived to wear the crown itself was an achievement#It's funny because Woodacre parallels Leonor to Richard III in terms of 'blackened' reputations for 'unproven' (...sure) crimes#(thankfully she admits Richard has been long-rehabilitated; what she doesn't bring herself to admit is that he's now over-glorified)#But I don't think this parallel works at all for the exact reasons she uses to try and reassess Leonor#Namely: Richard was the one in power. He was the King. The ultimate blame for what happened to his nephews was his own.#and moreover: Richard's actions against the Princes DID define his reign and were exactly what provoked opposition to his rule.#Any so-called 'rehabilitation' that doesn't recognize and emphasize this is worthless#also if we want to get specific: the Princes were literal children who did nothing and were deposed in times of peace.#Carlos and Blanca were adults with agency and armies and Leonor's actions against them took place in the middle of a civil war#So ultimately I think Leonor's case is fundamentally very different and I don't think her comparison holds well at all
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
...
#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Yuri's dialogue (JP) is so fascinating to study, like... the repetitive use of certain words/phrases that others use sparingly but he uses constantly. the way it feels like his vocabulary is more expansive than what he uses, but he defaults to a "comfort" level of speech. the way it mixes in with his sort of "street talk" words and the sheer level of informality. the way his "street talk" phrasing is contrasted by the tone of his voice (on that note, people I know who also know JP are also very endeared by these aspects of him so I KNOW IT'S NOT JUST ME!!!).
'cause the thing is, he uses phrases that yeah, other people do use, but he uses a handful over and over and over (contrast to other characters' sparing use of repetition). it's actually... really refreshing? it sounds more relatable and less "video game/anime/JRPG/RPG" writing or something, idk. like closer to how a real person would speak.
I do my best in my translations not to make things sound too stiff across the board, but Yuri makes it so easy. it's why I'm so interested in translating all his lines in Vesperia, like... the actual, original tone for him with his original wording because it's smth Eng only players don't get to experience ('cause even if you listen with JP audio, if you don't know the language, ofc you're gonna miss out on context. it's nobody's fault for not knowing, just... they unfortunately miss out). the thing is, there are a lot of times when the lines in and of themselves are not contextually incorrect in the English ver (usually the situation for smaller scenes, because they altered the text outright for more important stuff which was the stuff that originally set me off, but there were also plenty of cases of just vocal tone shifting with the correct context that still gave off the wrong impression), but Yuri's tone is shifted away from the original in Eng even though it's completely and perfectly translatable.
I am by no means about to translate the entire game because let's face it, I really don't care that much for Vesperia on the whole. I'm kinda stuck with it because Yuri's there lo and behold I actually am WAY more engaged in his stories in Rays, Link and Asteria because it's an amazing character put into circumstances where he actually gets to shine and feels more alive, which Vesperia did not provide nearly as well with its very disjointed story. also, Tales gachas have banger stories that are arguably better than the mainline games, and they regularly make Yuri a very central character to the gachas. Crestoria was also about to do it until they pulled the plug on that game and I'm pretty confident something interesting has been lost to the world. also I just generally don't have the energy or motivation to do that, so... I'll only be focusing on Yuri's lines, especially because his stuff is where the bulk of the messing around was. he's just insanely fun to translate for and I love burying myself head first into his speech.
will I actually finish this project? dunno. will I get around to posting it? whatever I get done (so all of it if I complete it), and if I decide to call it quits then I'll post what I have at the time I decide that. will it take a long time? probably, but I can always mention stuff along the way...
#GTF Vesperia Things#GTF Yuri Things#also the more I comb the script the more I properly notice all the uh... very awkward loc changes in smaller sentences in smaller scenes#like things that change the understanding of a sentence. or in Yuri's case just... the usual annoying personality shifting#noticing lots more stuff than when I did those big posts bc I was less focused on the tiny stuff/not side by side comparing#like a lot of this stuff is plot irrelevant and I knew it was littered around but I'm just getting#a bit more of a proper feel for it and how often it's there while studying Yuri's speech under a microscope bc I like observing him fkjhsjg#the fact that they're extremely largely consistent in tampering with Yuri's verbal (not just vocal) tone still has me LIKE.#but I'm fighting to ignore it so I can study my precious boy for reasons unknown beyond hyperfixation#also with Link I was actually mad at first bc they totally dropped the ball on Yuri's repetitive speech in arc 1. like it just wasn't there#there were plenty of times I noticed that normally he'd be SAYING those phrases but it just didn't happen where it should've#(like ''he'd def have said that here but it's not here'') Rays' main writer was not Vesperia's and she STILL got him down PERFECTLY#frankly I'd argue Rays' writing of Yuri is more correctly Yuri than Vesperia Yuri is which is oddly hilarious LOL#but mainly more that arc 2 Yuri is fucking WONKY sometimes but god knows most of my friends who know JP don't like that writer for#various reasons. somehow he pulled out that banger of a novel but arc 2 forget it. but yeah Rays just... really encapsulated YURI himself#the dialogue for him is spot on. not that Link and Asteria flunked with him bc they didn't#it's just that I think Rays and Miyajima gave the best quality of him bc the circumstances let him be more expressive#that said back to Link arc 2 did actually fix the speech issue so I don't know if they had different writers between arcs or just#realized they forgot to include those points of his character in arc 1 bc I know it wasn't the Link loc's fault#bc Yuri had full JP audio and I could hear that they just didn't have those things#but LORD the ACTUAL RELIEF that flooded me when arc 2 brought that shit back LMAOOOO#but yeah as far as Yuri goes he's absolutely fascinating and unique and he shines so bright in the gachas#it makes me really really sad that his home game is one I don't have much interest in#and that it's one that a lot of ppl feel the writing was wonky for (bc it was)#but I'm eternally grateful the gachas gave him opportunities to really shine as a character in great settings#bc it's not that he doesn't shine in Vesp itself. it's that the circumstances don't rly... allow him to be like PROPERLY unrestrained ig?#idk it's hard to explain. just. he was more. WHOOSH. I guess. in the gachas. yeah. like that. or smth. :')#sorta like. amazing character but not the best circumstances for him to show his true potential which I think he does in the gachas#bc the gachas have such great stories and scenarios and he's put into them#ANYWAY TL;DR YURI'S SPEECH IS FASCINATING AND I LOVE HIM
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hearing some thoughts on Rin's lines about Clear Wing.
I don't disagree that it feels off-putting or wrong (whichever you prefer to describe it as), but I imagine her reasoning doesn't necessarily boil down to seeing herself as above Yuugo (though it's very possible it partially is; they both lived in a dog eat dog world - the City - and they're commons to boot - so they're fighting one another to duel Jack up until she's kidnapped, even if Yuugo says they were going to do it together), as much as it boils down to her being the responsible one.
Yuugo really isn't, so it might possibly be that, given how dependable of a monster Clear Wing (and Crystal Wing) are, Rin thinks her burn deck is a better fit for such a monster than Yuugo's luck based deck. The answer to this is obviously no as soon as anything to do with Zarc or Ray comes into the picture (Clear Wing and Yuugo are both cut from the same quarter of the Supreme King Dragon, even if it was by En Winds.)
Or, Rin is probably jealous she doesn't have effect negation in her monsters, and is bullying Yuugo about it because she's seemingly never really dealt with her frustrations in any other way (because Yuugo's always there.) Or maybe because Clear Wing is a unique card and Rin wants a copy too.
Alternatively, this is somehow the same thing as Yuuri's sadistic streak; a hold over from their Original self, and Ray decided Clear Wing should've been one of her monsters. As if Zarc would lose one of his dragons without a fight, though.
(Additional note I think is important but couldn't figure out where to put it in; Rin's defeat line in the overworld implies to me that Yuugo expects her to win her matches, like it shouldn't be hard for her. Yuugo's never gotten angry at her even if she's gotten angry at him multiple times and she's probably afraid of what he'd think - either this hasn't happened and she's worried all his frustrations with her would ungracefully tumble out, only putting up with her because she wins and can get food on their table even if we know that wouldn't happen - he loves her so much he'll ramble about her to anyone given half a chance, or it has happened before and Rin doesn't want to experience that sort of thing again, as though it would embarrass her.) (So her self esteem is either rock bottom when it comes to losing. or she's got too much pride to admit any of her losses to the one person who adores her)
#marwospeaking#The City done fucked up these two kids. they gotta win or they're considered nothing more than dirt at the bottom of the slums#Not excusing her at all on this though. it really is rude of her. but it does present an opportunity to explore what's going on in her head#You know its bad when. out of the two responsible ones. Yuuto is somehow the less mean one. Rin what the hell#It's also possible these are things she'd never actually say in front of Yuugo. but DL doesn't have that so she says these words anyway#(she might not have ever wanted to voice that opinion either. but DL has her do so anyway)#I wonder how Clear Wing feels on this; She is more than dependable in getting a 7 out. designed to do that even#(which makes me think that Ray wanted to get a hold of Clear Wing - none of the others can intertwine their decks so easily..#.. so what reason/s could there be for that? other than it's the easy option for a character who only physically shows up in the last..#.. stretch of Arc V.)#But as There For Yuugo as Rin can/could be. she's still a part of Ray in the end. and Clear Wing is still scared of Ray from the last time.#I am willing to give DL the benefit of the doubt that Rin's feelings might be made clearer. and that this is just misdirection by omission#but this event also has Ruri to contend with. so I can only get so optimistic about Rin's character exploration here#on an unrelated but related note. Rin *please* just let Yuugo hug you. even just once. He missed you more than he'd miss anything else#Seeing him get nothing but kneed in the gut for wanting to hug Rin makes me more and more sad for his situation
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
there are things that you don't do for a year or more and pick up just right where you left off and these days i fear loving you might be one of them
#double meaning on that but. yeah.#it's like. i haven't touched the imaging software i use for an entire year. soldering iron in decades. pick it right back up. to my surpris#muscle memory is crazy#i don't draw for months and pick up right where i was with a few sketches bc the work you put in stays even when you don't actively practic#when it's something you've practiced weekly and daily it sticks with you and ig that's good#but then it's like. the horrors. that haunt you. yk? what if a part of me will always save a soft spot for my ex. what then.#what if I'm fine now and I'm doing okay and i don't miss it and I think i'm okay moving forward and i see her and suddenly I'm on the floor#what if some part of me that was in love never really went away what if i haven't managed to kill all of it yet#bc i genuinely would not know what to do. i. i don't want to admit it but one of my worst fears is liking someone who doesn't like you back#and what's even more horrifying is if it's obvious. if everyone can tell. and usually I'm good at hiding it! (not really) but it's just. id#it's shame in liking someone who you tell yourself you don't want to like and you know you shouldn't. and not having control over it.#hoping praying that either she does something that turns the little switch in my head that sends her into the unforgivable category#or that i become straight. or that i become straight. mhm. yep. or ig the other option is i get a crush on someone new but like. mm.#i kinda have gotten w every person I've had a crush on since hs and i kinda don't think im ready for another rs so soon.#the baggage i just got is. hm. idk i kinda don't wanna unpack it. it's something that can easily be done if i had the missing pieces but.#i don't think I'm ever gonna get them. so. instead I'm gonna take. maybe another 3 months or 5 months or a year or a few. to just. slowly.#idek. it's just triggering old things. bringing me back to when i was 14. i never really got closure from that either. it took me 3 years.#I'm sure this time it'll go away faster but idk experiencing it a second time has a different feel to it. idk. it's weird.#it's like. idk. it's like you're watching it happen and you're not even there anymore. idk. i really don't know.#oh. I've been dissociating.#idk maybe it's for the best i really don't know i really don't know and everyone says i have to do what's best for myself but idk what is#my life is on track things are moving forward I'm doing better and healing but i can't escape the feeling of dread#something is going to catch up with me sooner or later and idk what it is idk at what intensity and idk if i will be ready for it#but anyway. when you love someone intentionally every day for a while. when does it go away? will it go away?#or will i have to live haunted by ppl who are alive but changed. so practically dead w/o the opportunity to mourn. for the rest of my life?#like i don't think i get it. loving this person was like. cooking and eating. intentional. ingrained into everyday life. effortful.#what if my mind does forget but my body still remembers. what then. what if it's like searching for sth you don't remember having anymore#ig I'm just trying to figure out how much to forget these days. how much won't hurt if it all comes back to haunt me#delete later
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
trying to find a balance between "module that's easy to understand and follow bc i am terrified of DMing and might cry" and "module that's not boring af especcially in the first adventure bc that might be as far as i manage to get through before losing my mind and i at least want my forever DM to have fun as a player for once" is killing me lmao
#apiewofoaiwjefaoijfew#i REALLY do not think she will find the beginning of waterdeep dragon heist compelling unless i make changes but like aoeifja#i'm so overwhelmed by the idea of making changes#i just want something i can follow from start to finish so i can MAYBE learn that DMing isn't as terrifying as i think it is 😭😭#trying to desperately not to talk myself out of this lmao#uuuugggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#she also suggested the lost mines module bc it's meant for newbies but i'm just like OIFJAEOWIFAOWIJEF#she doesn't even really use goblins in her own games she's not going to find this beginning part interesting at all 😭😭#and i'm so nervous about any other modules bc it's just going to be her playing + an npc i'm controlling who is a fighter but like aofeijao#they still might get crushed even if i have her start at like level 3 for a level 1 adventure. i have no idea how any of this works anymore#idk OIFJAOEWIFAE the last time i tried to run stuff it was all homebrew and i was so fucking bad at it#i feel like everything i did made everyone miserable lmao#any time i tried to like just go w the flow it didn't work#esp bc i get so anxious about it aofiejaoijfwe#i am so not cut out for this but my wife literally never gets an opportunity to play and she has DM'd me almost every single day for like#five to six years now faoewijfaoiwjef she deserves a chance to play and has been really sad about not having one in the past#so i have to try at least#*dykeposting
3 notes
·
View notes