#havent stopped thinking about him since i saw the movie

[ryssbelle]

Had a silly dream where JD and Floyd came back to the troll tree before the last trollstice but after singing killed their grandma and decided to doodle and expand upon it a bit

Clay never left the tree but was too scared to return to the families pod since he didn’t want things to go back to how they were before, he did try to find his brothers during the escape but got separated by the cave in.

John Dory was the one to find Clay and see him get caught by the cave in, when he came out of the tunnel without Clay and holding his wristband they all just assumed he was dead. Even so JD still searches for Clay with the hope that he might’ve escaped and is alive out there.

They know Bruce is alive but after JD got the post card he assumed Bruce didn’t want to be found

Some more doodles that kind of show their dynamic

Also-

JD always brings home souvenirs for the brothers both as an apology for being gone for so long and also because of this:

[manheimsmuse]

Could you write smut for Ryan Baker? Like he’s jealous or something and is trying to prove a point

BEHAVE ; RYAN BAKER

a/n; very loosely based on that one scene in saltburn because i havent stopped thinking about that movie since i watched it.

warnings; 18+, smut under the cut, afab!reader, fem!pronouns used, fingering, pnv, unprotected sex for the love of god do not to this, ryan is a little mean, degrading language, second ryan smut in a bathroom my subconscious is telling me something.

“look at me when i’m talking to you,”

ryan barks out, grabbing your chin and forcing you to face the mirror in front of you as he bent you over someone’s bathroom sink.

scuba’s party, like all his previous parties, was insane. his house was packed full of people, most of them you never saw before in your life. you knew evan, though, and apparently ryan did not like that.

it was a harmless conversation, ryan was wrapped up in his own with friends of his you didn’t know so when evan approached you you welcomed the opportunity to do something other than stand there looking pretty. you spoke about nothing in hindsight, laughed at some dumb jokes he made and let his flirty comments fly over your head with no acknowledgment.

ryan acknowledged them though, joining your conversation after evan’s second comment on your appearance. five minutes later he’d dragged you into the downstairs bathroom and was pushing your dress up around your hips.

“you think it’s cute, hm? letting some loser jock paw at you like that?”

he repeated his question, one hand remaining on your face as the other found home between your legs, his middle and ring fingers finding their way inside you easily.

you gasp in response, knuckles whitening as you grip the ceramic basin. you always knew ryan was jealous, always worried that someone better would come along and you’d drop him in a heartbeat.

“answer me, angel.”

ryan demands, fingers curling inside you and eliciting a moan from your throat.

“he - he didn’t touch me.”

you challenge, refusing to give in so quickly and give him the answer he wants.

“you think you’re fuckin’ funny, huh?”

he chuckles, fingers moving at a pace that has your jaw hung open and your noises becoming more frequent.

“i think you’re acting like a slut. couldn’t handle not having my attention for five seconds? that desperate that you’d let that neanderthal speak to you like that?”

“ryan, ‘m gonna — no, wait!”

you whine as he retracts his fingers, cursing yourself for letting him know that you were about to cum already.

“what? you think i’m gonna reward that behaviour?”

he laughs, not his usual sweet laugh, but a laugh that lets you know you’re in trouble. his middle finger comes back to slowly circle your clit as he releases his grip on your face to undo his belt.

“ryan.”

“are you gonna behave, angel?”

his voice is almost gentle as he shoves his jeans down just enough to free himself, applying the slightest bit more pressure to your aching clit.

“ryan, please.”

“i said. are you going to behave?”

as he repeats himself he teases your entrance with the head of his cock, grinning at the way your body reacts to such a small gesture.

“i’ll behave.”

you agree desperately, frantically nodding your head in the hopes your answer has satisfied him enough to give you what you want.

“that’s a good girl,”

he groans, pushing into with one motion that has you crying out loud enough you wouldn’t be surprised if someone heard you.

“gonna fuck that attitude right out of you while i’m at it too.”

[rayghosts]

its been months since i watched puss in boots: the last wish, and i havent stopped thinking about how good it is. specifically, how it used its own genre as a plot device

when you go in to watch an animated family film, you think, surely no character will die in this. or if they do die, theyll probably fall off a cliff and land offscreen or something. no one actually brutally dies in a cartoon. theyre not even allowed to show blood! but then puss DOES bleed. and just as that scene is the turning point that makes him realize that hes not invincible, it makes the audience realize that this movie can get dark

but its not like the entire movie is grimdark after that. its still a family film! silly stuff still happens! its just that every so often in the middle of all the silliness, the wolf appears, and both we and puss are violently reminded that he very much can die die. this doesnt affect any of the other characters' goals, because why would the prospect of puss's death affect them? but for puss, who thought he was immortal, it's enough to send him into a fucking panic attack. it's a perfect illustration of how concepts like death are always lurking in the background

and i havent even started talking about THE SONG!! when i first saw this movie and heard puss singing fearless hero in the beginning, i thought, "oh, this is a musical!" but its NOT. no other song is sung by the characters throughout the film, but the same song is sung over and over, and it fits because puss is trying desperately to hold on to his past glory as a "fearless hero." and the lyrics: "Who's the gato who rolls the dice? / And gambles with his life?! / Who's never been touched by a blade? / Puss in Boots is never afraid!" hearing them the first time, they sound like normal lyrics youd hear in a song about how heroic a character is, but then it turns out to be clever foreshadowing because these traits (gambling with one's life, pretending youre never afraid, etc) are the very traits that puss had to let go of in the end to finally be able to confront death. i could go on and on about how amazingly this song was used in the movie, but the point is that they never would have been able to pull it off if this werent a family movie where characters bursting into song is seen as normal

seriously, this movie is SO cleverly done. even the fact of it being a 10-year-late sequel adds to the whole idea of puss being a past legend at the start. like, the concept of someone trying to evade death has been done many times already in other forms of media, but the way that puss in boots 2 executed it could ONLY have been done as an animated PG shrek spinoff

its SO SO GOOD and i hope to god it wins the oscar for best animated film

[filipinoizukuu]

what comes next though? (MHA ch. 413)

// major spoilers for mha ch. 413 since its leaks, so please stop reading if you arent quite caught up. i havent written one of these in a LONGGG while lmao.

ANYWAY, with all that being said.... this week's leaks huh?

We saw it coming a long time ago, we speculated it to hell and back, we made aus and fics, and now it's finally here. The conclusion we've reached and the one that's been hinted at since the release of Heroes Rising in 2019:

bnha is going to end with deku giving up one for all and becoming quirkless.

(LOTS of words under the cut -- youve been warned.)

For those who are a little lost; the basic premise of the ending we are hurtling towards is that Kudou (the 2nd user of ofa) has a plan to take down Shigaraki. With AfO dead and gone + Shigaraki becoming so powerful he is essentially invincible -- theres no other choice for the heroes other than destroying him inside out; the plan being the equivalent of charging a battery so much it explodes.

the way they're going to go about this is by essentially, feeding Shigaraki bits of One for All until he's given all of it -- then allowing the vestiges of the previous wielders to create a massive revolt similar to what SnS did until they can successfully tear him apart from inside the "quirk realm" and shut him out. Kudou volunteers to go next since danger sense has already been taken, and if Shigaraki uses gearshift again after Deku already used it twice, Tomura's body will likely shutdown and receive twice the backlash Deku does when he uses kudou's quirk.

(sidenote: funny as fuck that deku only understood once kudou equated the strategy to bkg throwing papers at him. bro stupid af.)

its a sensible(ish) idea. one that seems plausible given the context of the last hundred or so chapters with heroes like Hawks and SnS having their quirks revolt against both AfO and Shigaraki in a way that makes it clear that its not uniquely OfA that animates the souls of peoples quirks. Its inherent. Quote, Nana Shimura, "romantic" even.

(let it be known though that i think hori absolutely did not plan on delving into this plot point as much as he is now. ill explain in a bit, but heroes rising was 100% a major factor of why he moved in this direction.)

That being said, the conclusion of the plan (and subsequently, the major plot of bnha) is as follows: Deku gives up One for All to Shigaraki. One for All unites with All for One within Shigaraki and destroys it in one final clash between Yoichi and his brother. The break in the barrier of Shigaraki's hatred will part, letting him find the consciousness of Shimura Tenko behind it after years.

Shigaraki dies, taking OfA and AfO down with him,

and then Deku is quirkless once more.

Sad conclusion aside for now, I firmly believe that no matter what way you look at it; Deku was always meant to end the story without a quirk. Given some of the original drafts of bnha where Deku was never supposed to be given a quirk in the first place, this is clearly unsurprising. What's more is my favorite piece of information relative to katsuki and deku's character development:

the fact that heroes rising was (one of the) ideas for the original ending of bnha.

a refresher for some of you: heroes rising is about class 1a going to the isolated village of nabu island and defending it against an upcoming big bad villain named "nine" with a quirk that is essentially a scaled down version of all for one. katsuki and deku eventually resolve the conflict together via brute force by deku giving katsuki ofa, them rushing in while the quirk is transferring and both of them have it, and then ultimately defeating nine at the end. the movie then of course circles back on deku losing one for all, undoing that consequence by saying the transfer never completed bc ofa chose him over katsuki and they all move on to the endeavor agency arc with katsuki remembering absolutely nothing of the final battle.

many fans often misunderstand one of horikoshi's quotes about the movie in that it was, without a doubt, the original ending of bnha. for the sake of accuracy, that is not what horikoshi really said; what he ACTUALLY said was something closer and to the tune of of how it was "one OF the endings" he planned on using for bnha, but his original idea for how the story ends "has not changed one bit."

obviously disregarding the cop out where ofa sticks back to izuku in order for the series to continue as normal; this can only confirm that bnha was going to end with midoriya izuku quirkless whether katsuki was involved or not.

so what's different this time?

its hard to figure out how far horikoshi had planned the ending of bnha with heroes rising's prototype conclusion in mind. if heroes rising never pulled through and horikoshi had planned on bnha ending with the shared ofa transfer and katsuki continuing deku's legacy -- then that means katsuki wouldve died an early death because of all might's confirmation that only quirkless people can hold on to one for all without dying young, meaning he either intended on katsuki dying soon after the story ends or only planned that plot point after heroes rising was released.

the plot as well of heroes rising's conclusion cannot have been thought of all that early on because of ANOTHER tidbit of information that changes perspective of the entire series: in that,

bakugou katsuki was never supposed to be a major character to begin with. (keep an eye on this link; i reference this interview a LOT)

he was not supposed to have an arc. he was not supposed to become a major focal point of the series. he was not meant to be the hero he is in the story today. bakugou katsuki was not written with the intention of being a major narrative this late into the story -- instead originally only existing as a character that deku would surpass within the first few arcs.

but then katsuki cried, and deku apologized, and then opened his big fat mouth, and then told him a secret he didnt even tell his own mother -- and suddenly bakugou katsuki was not just another footnote in deku's story, but a legitimate character that grew and created one of the most loved (and hated) character turnarounds in shonen history. he started of as a literal EXTRA before snowballing into the very same character horikoshi decided would defeat all for one, the original scariest antagonist of the entire series. someone not even ALL MIGHT could defeat.

but circling back, yeah. heroes rising was definitely not the ending horikoshi thought of first, nor was it the ending he thought of last. ultimately, it was simply another route he couldve taken into wrapping up deku's fate into what it was (probably) always meant to be:

deku was gonna lose one for all no matter what.

it's kind of fitting, honestly -- for this to be the ultimate conclusion to the series. it makes the most sense, since what sent deku down this path so many years ago was his mother apologizing to deku for being quirkless; as if being quirkless meant he was born inferior to those who had quirks. people, after all according to deku's famous beginning monologue, are not born equal.

Even still, i thought to note: deku never stopped wanting to be a hero. we all know this, obviously. this was his driving force -- but then when you REALLY think about the implications, you have to ask. what the heck was deku even planning to do?!

he had ideas. he had hope. he wrote notebooks for the future and thought of his costume for being a hero -- but not once do i remember him writing about his hero experience as if he was suddenly going to develop a quirk. he was planning on saving people quirkless -- an extremely interesting motivation especially when he couldve so easily chosen to walk the path of being a doctor or engineer instead if he wanted to save people so badly. its a story about conviction, about doing the things you wanna do in the way you wanna do it no matter what ANYONE else says and hey wait a minute that sounds familiar

it doesnt quite read that way at first, especially because of how izuku almost listened to all might about "being realistic" when the first met and nearly gave up on becoming a hero entirely, but izuku is a lot similar to katsuki in the sense that no matter what gets in his way -- he is determined to achieve his dreams in the way HE CHOOSES, and not the way that is more "convenient".

even when you look at just his name, "deku" in the way that uraraka had interpreted it (dekiru -- "you can do it!") and the way deku reexplains it to katsuki in deku vs kacchan 1 ("the deku that doesn't give up!") you can so easily tell that deku from the very beginning has only ever needed the slightest push to pursue being a hero, quirk-or-not-be-damned. hell, we even see a glimpse of this possibility in the sports festival race when deku absolutely DECIMATES not just bakugou but also TODOROKI (as well as every single other damn student participating in the festival) with nothing but robot scraps and his balls of steel. it just so happens that until the promise of one for all, no such encouragement or push was ever given to deku in his pursuit of heroicism, most especially in comparison to katsuki who had been receiving praise and validation for his goals his whole life.

i'd argue that deku's conviction is even stronger than katsuki in a way no other person seems to recognize (except maybe katsuki himself). katsuki had received only positive feedback and zero competition for his goals growing up while deku received nothing but discouragement. both of them kept the conviction of being a hero for TEN YEARS; neither wavering til the day of the sludge incident.

that aside; what comes next?

we know the story after that. deku gets his quirk, he goes to school, he fights, he drops out, he fights some more, and now he's standing before shigaraki tomura with every quirk of one for all unlocked and over twice the power that all might had in his prime -- fully knowing he's about to lose EVERYTHING in order to defeat shigaraki.

this is deku we're talking about. he doesn't care. he knows the implications and what that will mean for his dream -- but his goal right now is in front of him. his goal is shigaraki, consumed by hatred, threatening to take down the world izuku loves most into a pit of misery and decay because society failed people like them. does he care? probably. will he refuse to give up his power if it means not saving the world and fulfilling one for all's purpose? absolutely not.

deku has made all might's quirk his own, but one for all does not belong to him. it belongs to yoichi. and kudou. and bruce and nana and all of the other users who built that quirk for generations in hopes that one day, someday, someone would be able to yield it all and bring down the monstrosity that created it in the first place. deku will not hesitate, but also deku knows what he will lose.

i have... a few things i dislike about this.

Admittedly, i do think that this is a better resolution than the simple brute strength approach of Heroes Rising. For one, while i do love heroes rising with my entire heart and soul, i firmly believe it would not have been a satisfying conclusion to the core lessons and teachings bnha tries to impart throughout the story. simply outnumbering and outpowering afo/shigaraki would not be enough to close yoichi's story and one for all -- much less the story of shigaraki himself as tenko, the boy consumed by hatred.

Still, this new ending that horikoshi has laid out leaves me with more questions; as well as large expectations for how izuku's character will close out. its complicated, because deku's evolution and development is subtle and intricate in a way i havent seen from other shonen protagonists and i worry about doing it justice.

but most of my problems have to do with bakugou katsuki.

(aint that the truth)

i know i mentioned that bakugou was never intended to be a major character, but i want it to be known that that was only in the beginning. season 1, maybe even season 2 -- but horikoshi had said it best himself in that bakugou katsuki, against his permission, had gained a life of his own and inserted himself into the very grain of mha's story. you cannot deny this.

he is the series deuteroganist inarguably. one of the most beloved characters and one of the most attentively-written development arcs in the whole series. katsuki in and of himself embodies major themes in bnha that make it so that ditching his development and impact last minute after defeating all for one would reflect poorly upon the conclusion of the story itself. he and deku are intertwined in arcs -- even if they do have separate paths at the end of the day. katsuki is the one izuku told about the quirk. the one who followed izuku during the paranormal liberation arc. the one who understands one for all and is determined to learn about it more than anyone else barring all might and deku himself. the one who is closer to izuku than anyone else.

it can't be over for their arc, no matter what way you see it. friends? rivals? hero partners? what comes next, when the smoke clears? what comes next when izuku gives shigaraki hell, like katsuki told him to?

katsuki's atoned. we accept that, have known it since chapter 285 and have continued to know it until the iconic apology in the rain. that's not where katsuki stops however, because we know that its not all about begging for izuku's forgiveness nor atoning for himself. its about catching up to izuku -- the last words he uttered before shigaraki crushed his heard say it all.

"can i still catch up to you, izuku?"

since the moment katsuki died, we've been given a metric ton of material to read through what he and izuku have become in the story. firstly, the point of katsuki being the person closest to izuku. what does this mean? what does that say about katsuki? is he supposedly the person izuku loves the most? the person izuku believes in the most? i'd argue these two criterion would easily fit his mother or all might a lot better -- not his childhood friend turned bully turned rival turned barely-friend. katsuki sure as hell didn't believe he was the person closest to izuku before shigaraki brought it up as evidenced by the fact that he let IIDA bring deku back to UA -- and neither does izuku as far as i bet. what was shigaraki's intention?

katsuki heard that statement. he hasnt said anything, but he definitely heard it. its an open end that is left entirely unanswered PRECISELY because katsuki fought afo on his own and izuku is about to tackle shigaraki without katsuki by his side. if it was heroes rising's ending wherein they would both fight shigaraki and take him down together -- then that statement would easily be answered by how their strength and bond is the one thing that gave them an upper hand in the final battle. other than that... i'm not entirely sure how they're going to have katsuki and izuku acknowledge katsuki's brief "death" and Tomura's reasons thereof.

But fine, lets ignore that for the time being and move on to what happened when Katsuki came back.

katsuki answered izuku's cry for help. he came back to life in the last moment to save all might when izuku was too busy fighting tooth and nail to win. they are the penultimate example of two sides of a hero; the win and save. not one without the other. every single parallel thus far between izuku and katsuki have always been to draw attention over and over to each of their stubborn convictions to win and save under all might's tutelage.

katsuki has chosen to prioritize winning and fighting over saving and rescuing over. and over. and over. and over again. at every single opportunity from the very beginning of the series. in usj, in sports festival, in the final exam, every choice he's made up until --

chapter 285 - bakugou katsuki: rising.

he chooses to save izuku in this instant. as he says, his body moved on its own -- or in other words, he felt like how izuku has always did since the sludge villain incident. this is bakugou katsuki catching up to midoriya izuku. its katsuki realizing that he needs to save so deku can win, and actually being okay with that for once. it's a major turning point in his character that clearly tells even horikoshi that there's absolutely no way katsuki can go back to being a side character within the plot of bnha after a development like this.

and then, after this instance, we notice it happen again and again. katsuki choosing to save to win instead of winning to save. katsuki protecting best jeanist against the nomu. katsuki coming to chase after izuku when he runs away from UA. katsuki (in a way) saving aoyama when its revealed he's the traitor. hell, katsuki saving ALL MIGHT as soon as izuku -- the savior -- begs someone to save his idol when he can't because he's too focused on trying to win.

so what changed?

what changed since the moment of chapter 285 was katsuki accepting his fears and anxieties. katsuki letting go of his aversity to working with deku. the reason katsuki started accepting the path of saving to win was because he TRUSTED deku to win where he couldnt.

this is katsuki accepting that him and izuku already surpassed all might together.

but katsuki said it himself. it's not over. he accepts that him and izuku are finally on equal footing -- hell, he admits he's the one who needs to play catch up. it's not about katsuki conceding to weakness, but katsuki being able to trust in izuku to finish the job. the point is that they both will break and break until they win the way they choose to, and the other will be there to win while they save and save while they win. moreso, katsuki still wants to be number 1. he still wants to catch up and surpass deku. he wants to fight by deku's side. but ... as we've established:

deku will be quirkless soon.

my problem (or, i guess, curiosity?) with the path horikoshi seems to be going down for the end of this story is what happens to this end? what happens to the wonder duo? i believe in a quirkless deku plot as much as the next person -- but any reader would find it easy to see that once deku loses one for all, he will not be nearly as efficient nor quick nor capable of a hero as he once was. especially not against a developed katsuki with mastery over cluster explosions.

he will lose one for all and he won't ever be the pro-hero he was going to be before the final war arc. katsuki will get number 1 surely, but will he be happy about this resolution? i don't think so. All Might himself had said it when Katsuki spoke to him about his relationship to Izuku; that the twin stars reminded All Might very much of his own rivalry with Endeavor and the bitter feelings it created.

endeavor expressed regret and a bitter end to their rivalry; the acknowledgement of the bitter truth that the only reason he was the number one hero is because all might lost his own quirk. he knew he didn't deserve the mantle all might had held for a long time before him. he knew that he was still only just playing catch up with the wisdom and understanding of heroicism that all might had in his heart from the beginning. endeavor will likely retire from being a pro-hero unsatisfied with this truth and his own victory at becoming the no.1 at the very end -- never feeling like he truly surpassed all might of his own accord. both enji and toshinori -- victims of their destiny.

is this the fate that will befall katsuki once izuku is quirkless for good?

There are many questions I have in wake of the recent chapter. The end of the series is here, and that's a whole can of worms i haven't touched in and of itself. We all saw this coming; some of us know that this was always going to be Izuku's fate since the beginning of the series. But now that it's more than just izuku's character involved in his dreams of being a hero -- i dont know how this series is going to conclude and if it will be satisfying to any means. there's a lot of questions i still have; bakugous arc feeling incomplete ever since he came back to life, the conclusion of all might and one for all's dreams now that they will disappear altogether. where does deku go after this? where does bakugou go? where do any of them?

i guess i gotta wait and see lol

[cricket-reader]

hii!! love your writing its intoxicating!!! idk if you’ve seen the movie Easy A (if not DO IT!!! its on Netflix) but if you have i was thinking a fem (or gn if youre more comfortable with it) reader x bucky fic thats along that line where reader is like Olive and bucky is like Todd? maybe lots of angst/fluff/smut or whatever this prompt takes you. honestly anything as long as it has bucky comforting reader through whatever you choose? again if you havent seen then feel free to ignore this and thankya!!!

Easy A

Masterlist | A03 | Wattpad | Recommendations | Inbox | Taglist

Summary: after a truly awful date, you are comforted by Bucky. (High School AU)

Warnings: language, mentions of sex, non-con kissing (not Bucky), Brock Rumlow being a prick, fluff

Word Count: 3,470

A/N: Sorry it took so long. It took a while to find inspiration, but here it is! I hope this lives up to your expectations 💕💕

How could life get so messed up?

You find yourself asking this question a lot lately. It was a simple rumour. Something that you could should have stopped—no, prevented.

In fact, you could have prevented all of this. So in hindsight, this is all your fault.

That doesn’t mean, however, that you deserved this… right? Sure, some people probably definitely thought you did. What, being the campus whore? The virgin slut.

It was a simple white lie. But it grew into something so much bigger. Something you could never outlive. Rumours spread fast. Especially on a campus. Almost like the wildfires along the west coast.

Despite never having sex in your life or even having your first kiss, you were the sluttiest, dirtiest, whore out there.

Whilst all that isn’t true, you sure felt dirty. It seemed as though everyone believed the rumours. Sure, you had done nothing to dispute them. If anything, you only encouraged them. That was just you being stupid, you realise that now. Despite all of that, you wished that someone could look through the stupid lies. Because everyone had to be idiots to believe them.

Thinking back on it, this all could have been avoided. If you didn’t tell your former best friend that lie, none of this would have ever happened. It was the snowball effect, and it had grown out of proportion.

It only truly hit you in the face when Brock Rumlow tried to make a move on you.

You didn’t put it past him to believe that you were really a whore. He was quite daft. Regardless, when he asked you out, you had foolishly believed that he liked you for you; not for your fake self. He took you out to eat at the fairly nice seafood place in town and everything. You should have known that it wouldn’t end well.

It started off fine. You both made small talk and ordered drinks and food. Then you saw Bucky. He was the guy you had liked for a long time, not that anyone besides your old best friend knew that.

He was singing a cheesy happy birthday song with his colleagues. You giggled at the sight, not expecting such a serious guy to do something like that.

It all went downhill from there.

You panicked when you saw your former friend, Sharon Carter, sitting at a table across the room. You knew that Sharon has had her eyes on Brock Rumlow for a while—since first grade to be exact. It evaded your mind until you saw her. You knew then and there the mistake you had made.

Even if she was no longer your friend, you felt horrible. Sure, she hadn’t been too friendly to you after all the rumours and lies spiralled out of control, but you were better than this. Surely there was some sort of girl code about this kind of thing, right?

“Shit… shit, shit!” you mumbled.

“What’s wrong?” Brock asked, confused at your sudden change in demeanour.

“Sharon is over there!”

“So?”

You huffed. “She’s been in love with you since the first grade.”

“And?”

“She’s my best friend.”

“I thought you two weren’t speaking anymore.”

“We’re not, but that doesn’t mean that she’s not my best friend or that I should be out with you.”

Brock frowns. “Her and I don’t have anything in common.”

“And you and I do?” This was such a bad idea. That was the mantra playing on repeat in your mind. This was a horrible, terrible idea.

“Yeah.” His voice wavered, cracking a bit. You could see his brain scrambling to come up with anything.

“Like what?”

“Like… I hate Kae too.”

You rolled your eyes. Kaecilius. The man that hated you from day one—ever since one of his Zelots—what they called themselves—overheard you talking to Sharon in the bathroom. A religious self-centred prick that thought his ways were better than everyone else’s. Nobody’s liked him.

You scoffed, “If that’s our connection, I should just date the entire school.”

“Haven’t you?”

That right there. It should have been a warning to you. But you just shook your head, brushing it to the back of your mind to focus on something more important: getting out of there undetected.

Before even eating your food, you managed to convince Brock to leave. It wasn’t soon enough because Sharon saw you. Alone with Brock. On a date.

The betrayal on her face hit you like a punch to the stomach. What even was your life anymore?

You both rushed out of the restaurant. Tears were threatening to escape from your eyes, but you willed them away.

“I’m sorry about that,” you apologised, walking to the car. You opened the door to get in, but Brock shut it before it even got halfway open.

“Uh, I’ve got something for you.”

You tilted your head, hoping it was something romantic.

He flicked up an orange gift card. “Two hundred dollars to The Home Depot,” he said with a big smile on his face.

Your face crumpled in confusion before the realisation set in.

This wasn’t a date. No. Of course, it wasn’t. Not really. It was a way to get you to–

“Bam,” he said, all smug. As if he has done something.

“I didn’t realise this was a–“ Now the tears really were starting to form. You didn’t listen as he explained himself. You didn’t care enough to hear what he had to say. You didn’t care because once you finally thought someone had shown an interest in you, it blew up in your face. Hell, maybe you’ve deserved it. Going along with all these rumours. It was bound to bite you in the ass one way or another.

You took a breath, resolving yourself to all the age old question. “So what did we do on this date?”

“Whatever two hundred bucks gets me.”

And with that he leaned in, grabbing your chin to push his lips against yours.

Warning signs flared in your mind. Just what the hell did he think he was doing? You pushed him away. “That’s not really how it works,” you tried to explain.

He wasn’t hearing it. “It’s okay,” he muttered before closing the gap again. You hit his chest, trying to get him off of you.

“Stop!” you cried out, so fucking done with today. “I’m not really having sex with people for money. I’m saying I’m having sex, but I’m not having sex for money.”

You didn’t know what about your explanation was lost on him. How he could listen to that and still continue, maybe he just wasn’t listening in the first place.

He leaned in again, trying to reassure you. And yet again you pushed him away. “Stop! No, no! Stop!”

“What? Come on just relax, babe. It’s alright.”

It was as if he didn’t hear you the first million times you said it. It was as if you didn’t repeatedly push him away. Or maybe he was just dumb enough to continue pursuing you when you clearly didn’t want it.

Whatever the case was, you didn’t care.

So, yet again, you pushed him away. His back hit the car, and you walked away.

“Come on, this is bullshit! I paid you.”

You turned on your heel and flicked the card back at him. “Well now you didn’t.”

He yelled after you, upset that he didn’t get what he wanted. Tears began trickling down your face.

You heard your name being called out, a familiar, friendly voice. You turned around to see Bucky, white button down and all, walking towards you.

“Bucky… hi,” you couldn’t hide the way your voice wobbled even if you wanted to. You saw his fists clenched as he watched Brock’s car skirt away.

“Hey, you alright?”

“What? Oh, yeah, yeah, I’m… I’m fine.”

He frowned, not believing you for a second. The moment you walked in with Rumlow, he was angry. Be it jealousy or knowing you deserved so much better than that prick–probably both—he hated watching you two together. It was wrong.

“You sure?” Bucky frowned. He hated seeing you cry. Especially over some jerk that didn’t deserve you in the first place.

You sniffed, rubbing your nose. This day has been so awful. You just wanted to go to your warm bed, curl up and cry. If god took any liking to you, you wouldn’t wake to see the next day. But why would he after all you had allegedly done?

“I uh, just got off my shift. If you uh needed a ride home,” Bucky offered.

Despite the fact that you had just been harassed by a guy you foolishly thought you could trust, you put your trust in this one. You just hoped Bucky was better. You had no reason to be weary of his offer. He had been nothing but nice to you even when the rumours and lies began their torrent on your life.

“Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

“Nah, plus my ma would kick my ass if I left you here alone.” The corners of his eyes crinkled as he chuckled. It was adorable. “Or my sister, or Steve’s ma. Hell, even Steve would try to beat me up.”

Now that was an image. Tiny, little, asthmatic Steve trying to beat up bulky, tall, strong Bucky?

You giggled in spite of yourself. Bucky always seemed to know just what to say.

You both climbed into Bucky’s car before he took off. It was silent for the most part, letting you think back to everything that had happened today.

You watched Bucky as his hands gripped onto the steering wheel. His mouth was set in a heavy frown, and you could practically see the gears turning in his head.

“What’s up, Buck?” You tried your best to sound like Brock’s actions hadn’t bothered you as much as they had.

He sighed, glancing at you for all but a second. He rolled up to a red stoplight and used that moment to look you in the eye.

“He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

“Hmm? Oh, Brock? No, no, no. Not physically anyway.”

His eyes searched your face. He was clearly distraught. “I’m sorry.”

“What? Why?”

“I didn’t get out there soon enough, if I just got outta there sooner he wouldn’t have… and you wouldn’t have had to–”

“Light!” you nudged him.

“Right! Sorry.”

“And hey, it’s not your fault, Bucky.”

Bucky’s knuckles were white as snow. He was clenching his jaw so hard, you worried he might damage his teeth. “He wouldn’t listen to you. You said no. Multiple. Times.”

Your heart ached because you knew Bucky wasn’t going to let this go. Because he actually cared. His eyes stayed on the road, and you were surprised the asphalt didn’t spontaneously combust into flames with the ferocity behind his glare.

“But I got away, I’m okay.”

“And what if you didn’t, huh? What if I was too late? You deserve so much better, you hear me?”

You didn’t even realise he was staring right at you until you looked back at him. You were stopped at a stop sign. With no one behind you, he didn’t feel any need to keep driving.

His face morphed into pure horror as the tears began rolling down your face. You looked away from him again, to your lap this time.

“‘M sorry, doll. I didn’t mean to yell, I’m so sorry.”

You shook your head and laughed. What even was Bucky Barnes? And why the hell was he always so inherently good?

“Bucky,” you sniffed, “I’m not upset about you yelling. I’m… It’s just… you, you care? About me?”

His brows furrowed. “Well, of course I do. You’re a great person. Your sweet and smart—”

“Why are you doing this?”

“What?”

“Come on. You’ve heard the rumours, James. You aren’t living under a rock and you’re not stupid.”

“Exactly, so I’m not stupid enough to believe the lies being spread around. What I can’t seem to figure out, however, is how you got mixed up in all of this.”

“It’s a really long story.”

Bucky shrugs, “I’ve got nowhere to be.”

That is how you and Bucky ended up on top of a nearby cliff, sitting on the hood of Bucky’s car, eating snacks you got from a gas station. You told him most of the details to your unfortunate series of events that led to this moment. Bucky only stopping you every once in a while to ask questions or make threats to anyone that he claimed deserved it.

You felt like a huge weight had been lifted from your shoulders. The best part of it was, you actually thought that Bucky believed you. He held no judgement and was a total sweetheart the entire time—well, besides the times when he teased you. But even then it was all in good fun.

You shouldn’t have expected anything less from the guy that was a complete teddy bear once you peeled back his intimidating layers. He was a good man, through and through. Nothing and no one could take that away from him.

When you finished, you leaned back to look at the stars. “If I ran away and changed my name, would you come with me?”

He chuckled. “I don’t know if that’s the best course of action to take.”

“What else can I do, Bucky? You’ll be the only person that believes me!”

“Maybe I’m the only person that needs to.”

“Yeah, right. What if my supposed sex life gets passed around so that everyone knows about it. Employers? Schools? The government? I’ll be screwed!”

“Why would the government care?” he guffawed.

“I don’t know, okay! Stop laughing at me, you jerk! This is a serious crisis.”

“Okay, sorry! Sorry!”

“It’s hard to believe you’re sorry when you’re still laughing.”

He calmed down enough to stop his laughter. “Look, you and I both know this won’t go away overnight. You did dig yourself into a pretty deep hole. I don’t know how we’re going to fix it, we just will, okay?”

“Okay, and what’s in it for you?”

He hummed, taking his eyes off of the stars to look at you. “Well… I get to help you. Maybe I’d get to spend more time with you too.”

“And why would you want that?” You look down at him, surprised to find him staring back at you.

He shrugs before looking back at the sky. “You’re pretty cool.”

“Mhm, and did you make this assessment before or after all these rumours started?”

“Way before.” He looks back at you. “Maybe that night I wasn’t ready for my first kiss. The night you covered for me, and you didn’t get anything out of it. You just did it out of the goodness in your heart.”

“I… didn’t think you’d remember that…”

“Of course, I remember. I’m practically kicking myself right now for not actually kissing you.”

“Oh, yeah?”

He hummed his agreement. Your heart beat faster as his eyes dropped to your lips only momentarily. If you had blinked, you would’ve missed it.

He cleared his throat and got up. You followed after him, frowning as he took a deep sigh. “What’s wrong?”

He looked back at you, anguished. “Sorry, I didn’t mean… I’m trying to do this right, y’know. I don’t want to pressure you or anything and this is all wrong.”

“I’m not following,” you cut his ramblings short.

“I’ve… I’ve liked you for a long time… I just didn’t say anything because… well, as Steve put it, I’m too chicken shit.” He chuckled. “I should’ve done it sooner, I guess.”

You didn’t know how to respond. You were speechless. You wondered just how different your life would be if he had confessed sooner. The fact that he felt anything for you at all was… it was… you didn’t even know.

“God, this is the worst possible time to tell you. I’m such an idiot! I’m so sorry, just forget I said anything.”

“What… what if I like you too?”

Bucky froze. All of him hoped that would be your response. Truly. But he didn’t want to take advantage of you. You had just gotten done with what was probably the shitiest date of your life. You had been ostracised by everyone else. And he was the only one who held an olive branch to you. It wasn’t fair to you.

“I… I can’t… not in my right mind would I ever dream of taking advantage of you like this.”

Your face twisted. “Take advantage? Bucky, how can you take advantage of me if I like you back?”

He sighed. “You’re not thinking straight. I’m just the first guy who wasn’t a complete dickwad to you, so naturally you would like me.”

“Bucky, stop. I have liked you… for a lot longer than I care to admit. This isn’t me being desperate for any positive human connection. I genuinely like you.”

He bit his lip, looking so conflicted it hurt. You wanted to ease his worries. He shouldn’t feel that way. Not when you truly cared about him and have for a while. You’d like to think you deserved something good in your life. And if that good just so happened to be named Bucky? Well… who were you to deny it?

You advanced toward him, looking into those pale, stormy blue eyes. He said your name, a warning tone lying underneath every syllable.

“Tell me you don’t want this, and I won’t push any further,” you murmured. You were so close to him you could feel the heat from his furnace-like body. He stared into your eyes, thinking about how damn lucky he was to have such a beautiful view tonight.

“You sure you want this?” Bucky just had to ask. He needed to be sure. He didn’t even know what this was. It could be just a simple kiss, maybe a one-night stand, or, if he dared to hope, a relationship. Whatever it was, he would take it. He would be grateful for the chance to hold you, to kiss your lips and maybe more.

“Have I not made it clear enough yet?” You smirked at him. Bucky’s tongue wet his lips, a moment you traced with your eyes. He was gorgeous.

His hands cupped your face as he leaned in. You both closed your eyes as your lips met. You let him take the lead, not one hundred percent certain what you were doing.

Most people when looking back on their first kiss, regale about how horrible it was. How awkward it was and how terrible it panned out.

You were not most people.

It was easy to follow Bucky’s lead as his lips moved against yours. You hoped you were doing good with your first kiss. You hoped he liked it. Because you really liked being kissed by him.

When you broke apart for air, you opened your eyes to see him grinning like a love-sick fool. It was so endearing that you pulled him into another quick kiss.

“I never thought I’d get to do that,” Bucky murmured against your lips. They were still held in an impossibly adorable smirk that made your insides melt.

You knew right then and there, you wanted him to be your first. Your first everything. Your first kiss, your first real date (because you sure as hell weren’t counting the shitstorm from earlier as your first date), your first boyfriend, your first lover.

“I really like ya, doll. Maybe we should do this again sometime?”

“Yeah,” you breathed out, “maybe I can skip the awful date next time though.”

“Well, if you wouldn’t mind… next time you could have a nice date. With a pretty nice fella if I do say so myself. He can be a bit of a jerk sometimes, but he’ll treat ya right.”

You smirked. “‘S that so? Maybe I’ll just have to go on that date and see for myself.”

He smiled even wider. You didn’t think it was possible. “Really? Does that mean you’d wanna go on a date with me?”

“Yes, you buffoon. I thought you were supposed to be a lady’s man.”

“Hey now,” he chided, “weren’t we just having a conversation about how awful rumours could be?”

You chuckled with him as he pulled you into his arms. He pressed a gentle kiss into your hair.

“I think we should get back before my parents send out a search party.”

He laughed and agreed. Bucky drove you back to your house. Instead of curling up and crying in your bed, you ended up smiling like a lovesick fool until sleep overcame you.

Bucky Taglist: @harleycao @hallecarey1

[ur-friendly-neighborhood-simp]

sO. I've seen like a million different theories on why Miguel's universe collapsed and this entire time I've just been like "I thought it was because he replaced his dead self???" Like. There were 2 Miguels in one universe. Obviously nothing good can come from that. Also where'd he hide the body???? and what were his killers thinking when they saw bro up and at it again like nothing happened??? And- kay I'll shut up about this but I really wanna rant about some time

Idk anymore maybe I'm underthinking things???? What're your thoughts?

hi! im sorry i didnt answer this earlier, i was very busy today

im gonna cut the post here because ill be talking a lot

first of all, i see your point, and this confuses me a lot too. but after watching the movie 13 times and thinking about it 24/7, i have literally no idea how that universe collapsed. i mean, if it collapsed because there were two miguels in the same universe, why didnt miles' universe collapse too, since in itsv there were 4 peters in 1610? (peter b, noir, porker and the blond dead one). they were there for a while, and the only time that the dimension almost collapsed was when kingpin activated the collider. i have some theories, but i havent looked into it a lot;

1. maybe it had something to do with the canon? if its real, which i very much doubt, then miguels death in that universe was a canon event and gabriela was supposed to grow up without a father, and miguel going there stopped that from happening, so the univese self-destructed. *if* the canon is real, of course

2. i think the multiverse is some type of conscious. like, miguel saying "theres no problem with me going there, nothings going to happen" made something happen just because miguel had to be proven wrong. or maybe to teach him a lesson to not invade other dimensions? some type of karma

also, yes, the whole thing is creepy as hell, because he definitely did something with the body so he could replace miguel 2.0 without anyone knowing, and a lot of people must have been confused, and because of what you said, like "bro isnt that the guy we killed the other day" and also because imagine one day your husband comes home and his eyes are more red and he has fangs and he forgets things? its giving skinwalker, tbh

im just as confused about this as you are, and sorry i couldnt give a straight answer. i hope well find some things out in btsv (when it comes out in 3726). also, you can rant as much as you want, i love listening to people talk, especially when its about atsv 🫶🏻

[fairys-dream]

wrote a vent piece using origins victor. yea.

actually its short enough i can probably just put it here too soooo under the cut ⤵️⤵️⤵️

When his Father died, Victor stole a pair of his jeans.

He went through his Fathers drawers and took it.

They were baggy at first, but with age, he grew into them.

The eventual rips and stains were his, but the jeans were still once worn by his Father.

He didn’t ever want to become Him.

Never wanted to hurt Jimmy like he had been at the hands and words of his Father.

But when he yelled, he heard His loud voice. And when he hit, he felt His fists as his own.

Jimmy never fought back.

Never even struggled the times he tightened the grip around his throat.

Victor wished he would.

He ached for him to show some hint of them being the same, selfishly, so he wouldn’t have to feel so guilty.

But part of him barely even registered it was wrong.

Jimmy was his family, his friend, and they needed eachother. They could never leave eachother, so why worry?

When the moment came that finally pushed Jimmy enough to fight back, he could tell the kid was giving his all. It wasn’t enough, but he was trying.

Victor laughed as he took the punches Jimmy threw at him, which only urged the other on more, to Victors delight. He wanted to see that same rage he showed the night he killed their father.

But, as the tears started to fall down Jimmys face, he knew it was time to stop.

As much as he internally wanted to keep pushing him, to keep feeding his own ego, he knew better than to make him cry any harder.

Anger Victor could deal with, but it pained his heart to see his little brother upset.

His father never seemed to notice anyones tears, but Victor saw Jimmys, and that gave him a sense of pride, even when being the rare cause of them in the first place.

Victor wrapped his arms around his brother held him close, nuzzling his face into his wild hair as a silent apology. And, as usual, Jimmy held him back just as tight.

The jeans he wore would always be his Fathers, regardless of the years spent owning them.

His genes would always be His.

Notes:

while at work today, i was thinking about how even though i had ripped holes into the jeans my father gave me as a teenager (that i was currently wearing and still wearing as i write this), they were still technically once his, even though i had made them my own.

so i put my thoughts of my own daddy issues + older brother issues through origins victor.

i dont remember much from my childhood or teen years, so i did my best to remember the reasoning behind the things i did and the ways i felt. i would like to think i was more good than bad, as we were once eachothers closest friend, but i really can only remember small bits and pieces. victor had a different experience since he had to actually take care of jimmy, and i sometimes wonder if i would have been nicer if that were the case with me and my younger brother. im better now, stopped being mean when i was 14, but we dont hangout anymore. my father never hit me, as far as i can remember, so im not sure where i got all the violence from….he was always blind to my tears though. that i do remember.

i had dinner with my father today. i havent lived with him in years and he feels like a stranger now. as we were leaving, he asked if the rips in my jeans were made by me. i said yes, and that the jeans used to be his. he didnt remember giving me them, but i swore that he did. thats probably symbolical for something.

[queerspaceprince]

super long post

i saw the tv glow spoilers, me being depressing, tw's in tags

i went to see I Saw the TV Glow this afternoon. i got it. def cried a little (idk if hrt has stopped me from crying more bc i havent cried since i was in hs anyway) my sib got it, tho we havent talked ab it yet bc im still processing even now. my mom did not get any of it. at all. wasnt affected. thats fine, whatever.

and. jesus. i give the movie a 15/10, but it was. a whole lot. i have too many emotions.

Im def gonna mention a few spoilers so if you dont want to be spoiled, is your warning.

it made me feel too much. is the allegory really allegory if the hidden meaning is right at the surface?

when owen says that thing during their convo on the bleachers -i cant remember the exact words fuck- something about feeling hollow or missing something or whatever, how he thinks something is wrong with him and his parents do to-i feel that. so much. i felt it so much more before my egg cracked, but i still feel it in relation to my depression and anxiety. that hit me.

there was also that part about feeling like you're watching yourself from the outside, as if through a tv. oof.

then the whole thing maddie said about how time didnt feel right, how nothing changed when she left. i get it. I was 10 nd my parents got divorced, and suddenly im 11 and thinking i wanted to d1e for the first time, and then im 14 in a kind of manipulative relationship, with like 1 friend and super depressed, and then i was graduating and realizing im queer and exploring my gender and going through a breakup. then im 20, and getting my first job, and coming out to my family. and now im 26. and i still mostly feel the same way i always have. i have more good days, and im more confident now, but i still feel like im just going through the motions a lot of the time.

when did I stop being a kid? ive been an adult for 8 years and Im still only working part time (32 hrs), still living with my mother bc rent is $$$$, still barely functional enough that I havent cleaned my room since last year and ive only showered 3 times in the past week, and i have to force myself to go get coffee on my days off or else ill stay in bed all day. Im just stuck here. i shouldve taken driving lessons when I could. id be out. except i cant leave my sibling behind with my mother. shes not awful, but them being alone is an explosion waiting to happen. but they dont have a job and i doubt i could support both of us. and now i dont trust my eyes enough, like i read for 15 minutes and everything else goes blurry, like im seeing triple.

anyway. next is the scene in where she talks about k1lling herself to get back to the pink opaque world. I. have to admit i nearly threw up. the imagery, the way she spoke about it. she said she regretted it while she was stuck underground, then how she felt good about it, about getting out....ive been sitting in a low spot for a while, it was better while we were on our trip, but it just reverted when we came back. i keep thinking im going to relapse into sh again. i feel so close to the edge sometimes. and theres really no reason for it either. my life is fine. not great, not perfect. but adequate. anyway i had to close my eyes and take a minute after that.

i feel that even without wanting to go back to the other world, maddie was suicidal. she wouldve found some reasoning to k1ll herself. Now ive only ever been actively su1cidal once, when i was 15 -or 16- idk my teen years are all a blur of depression and anxiety. im good now. well. i say good. im more, self destructive then really wanting to d1e. just. i feel so bad on the inside for no reason, why can i have a reason to hurt on the outside?? anyway, im ok now, im 3.5 years clean, i dont want that to change. im working on my coping mechanisms.

there was another quote from that planetarium scene that i couldnt stop thinking about but has now vanished from my mind entirely. bc sometimes getting my thoughts in order is like. catching smoke.

anyway. then everything after that. him growing old. knowing something about him is different but not wanting to acknowledge it or it would drastically his life as he knows it. I understand that feeling. except for me, its not exactly acknowledgement of myself, its doing something about it. while I didnt exactly stay in the closet long, that feeling of not wanting anything to change is why the closet exists. i realized i was queer in 2014, trans 2015. came out as bi that summer, but i didnt come out as trans until 3 years later. when I had a job. access to money if i ended up getting kicked onto the street. i literally had a bag packed and ready to go. and yet. even when i did come out, i was too afraid to correct my family on my pronouns or name for another year. my sibling really helped with that. immediately used them. Tbh theyre my fave person and id do anything they asked.

the whole thing about there still being time.

i see a lot of tiktoks about this. people watning to do stuff now bc there is still time to change your life or whatever. im interpreting it differently.

there is time now, but your hourglass will run low eventually. live while you still can, while you can still do something about it. how that message showed up after maddie left- their time together had run out, but he might still be able to do something. make a change. idk. but owen was too scared to do anything.

im still scared to do anything.

i still dont correct people on my name or pronouns if they get them wrong. i still dont speak up if my family says anything not pc (they are learning tho). im too scared to talk about any big feeling i have bc ive always been brushed off in the past and i dont want to feel worse becasue of it.

i still havent done anything to get my name or gender marker changed bc im scared. idk why. ive been living as a man for 6 years, i got top surgery almost 3 years ago, and ive been on hrt for nearly 2.

it terrifies me for some reason. maybe ts the complexity of it. ive found 3 different versions of the paperwork, and nowhere does it tell me exactly how or who to submit it too. one of those said i could submit online but it had to be printed, notarized, and scaned back into the computer? none of the other versions said it had to be notarized???

and i have nobody who has any knowlege that could help. my aunt worked for a lawyer for years, and yet she just said all I have to do is go to the dmv. like babe. no. thats not how that works.

i think ill start on that again.

while i still have time.

[mausolealdrift]

Do you have a deathgasm notp??? Sincerely, a canon zakk/Medina was a fucking cosmic fuck up incident truther

oh you’re absolutely right i have So many thoughts about this. sorry this took me forever to answer i needed to collect all of my thoughts together and all of that i am Normal about Characters

so like . for obvious reasons the thought of ppl genuinely shipping zakk and medina as in like……… thinking theyd actually be good together or smthn is a fucking insane idea and im So very glad ive only seen maybe one person say some shit like that. (which like. honestly im starting to think i might have imagined the post in my head just to make myself mad bc i havent been able to find it since ??? but i SWEAR i saw someone shipping them once .) the two of em actually being in a relationship would just be. Awful and unhealthy for both of them

(and yeah zakk and brodie arent exactly healthy for each other either . but in the sense that they both make each other Worse yet neither of them can stay away from the other even if they want to etc etc. which is actually sexy and not just . y’know)

but anyway . yeah Definitely a cosmic fuck up. medina deserves better than that :( like she’s been objectified and treated like shit by pretty much every guy who looks her way and then zakk lies to her abt the one guy who actually respects her to manipulate her into hooking up w him. give her a BREAK

but as much as it was The dick move of the century i think zakk had his reasons for it aside from just boredom. Obviously this is all very much my personal and extremely biased interpretation etc. but i think it was out of frustration more than anything else because he just can’t fucking cope with having feelings for brodie. regardless of whether you see those feelings as romantic or not he Cares too much about him. and he doesn’t know how to handle that so he takes his anger and frustration out on medina in such a spiteful and destructive way because it’s all he knows how to do. and whether he knows why or not, the idea of brodie getting closer with medina bothers him so so deeply – enough for him to try and sabotage their relationship at every chance he gets (and then later trying to keep them apart to stop brodie finding out what he did because he doesn’t want to lose him) under the guise of just being bored or only caring about himself.

and i really don’t think there’s much of a possibility that he did it because he was into her, or jealous of brodie, or anything like that. zakk never showed interest in her at all until then (i.e. when she made a move to try and get closer with brodie) and just….. seemed generally pretty indifferent to her otherwise. if he really wanted to then he could’ve made a move before, but he didn’t.

he purposefully did something that he knew would hurt them both if they (inevitably) found out, maybe not because he genuinely wanted to hurt them but because he’s reckless and destructive in nature, (and maybe a little bit stupid sometimes), and just doesn’t know how else to handle or comprehend his feelings other than to take it out on other people.

i think a lot of the dickhead-ish shit zakk does in the movie seems kind of random and thoughtless and it’s difficult to unpick what his motivations are for the things he does aside from just ‘because’, but a lot of it starts to make a lot more sense when you see it as a result of him caring about brodie far more than he wants to, and not knowing how to handle it. he seems so cruel and uncaring, and he definitely wants to be seen that way, but i think he cares deeper than anyone else in his own (kind of incomprehensible) way. and yeah, it’s still shitty and selfish and fucked up, and he still took advantage of medina and used her regardless of why, but i dunno. i think the reasons for it were a lot more complex than he let on.

(again, maybe i’m reading too much into it all and he is just a fucking cunt who just did shitty things for no reason, but the fact that he still came back for brodie after everything, despite how mad he was, even though it led to him dying in the end, is more than enough to show that he really does care too much for his own good.)

so yeah uh. i don’t fucking know how this went from ‘yeah i think zakk/medina sucks’ to a full-on analysis of zakk. But i dont care actually i love being fucking insufferable about this stupid movie <3

sorry for the massive fucking wordvomit im tortured by the curse of Thinking about characters

[talkingandwatching]

So I watched the fnaf movie yall this was crazy

Hello everyone, I'm literally on my way home from the movie theater while I'm writing this post (might be a couple of days to publish it because I have no attention spam) because I watched the Five night's at Freddy's movie and yall, this was wild.

Before I get into it, I wanna complain that the guys in the front seat talked nonstop, like, all the time while we watched this movie so I wanna tell everyone, if youre the kind of person who does this crap, please stop, its very annoying.

I never once had the chance to feel like I literally cant talk about a movie, not because of the spoilers but because I literally cannot find the words to describe what I just saw, not because it was shocking or anything but because there is almost nothing to talk about. But what kind of "movie critic" would I be if I didn't at least try?

I think the main reason why I cant say anything is because I can barely comprehend the fact that this is a real movie that I watched in theaters, I think it will take about 3-5 business days for me to finally settle this information down.

This is the part where I start talking about the movie and it will probably have spoilers, so read it at your own risk.

Even before watching the movie I realised that it will be a real challenge to figure the lore out, since okay, we got Mike as a main character, I thought then it supposedly Michael Afton right? But his sister was called Abby and not Elizabeth and I knew Mike is interacting with William Afton (and I knew its William because it was Matthew Lillard in the trailer and everyone knew Matthew Lillard will play William Afton, the internet went crazy for over a week), but somehow he doesnt suspects its his dad? Also Vanessa is in this movie? And I had even more questions and let me tell you, none of them was answered by the movie.

The movie starts with our main character Mike (played by Josh Hutcherson), who works as a security guard in a mall, but beats the shit out of a random man because he thought he's kidnapping a kid but the kid was actually his son, then he gets fired, so a guy, supposedly his boss called Steve Raglar (played by Matthew Lillard) offers him a security guard job at an abandoned restaurant called Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, but Mike rejects it, saying he cant do night, then we find out why. He has sleep problems because he dreams about the same thing over and over again, which is the memory when he witnessed his little brother, Garret being kidnapped. This memory haunts him and he's also the legal guard of his little sister, Abby. Abby is a weird kid, she has invisible friends that only she can see and she's also very antisocial in school, which worries both the teachers and Mike's & Abby's aunt that want to take full custody over Abby because she doesnt think Mike is a suitable guard for her (neither does Mike thinks he's suitable for this but yk, he doesnt want Abby to live there because they both hate their aunt). After this, Mike changes his mind about the security guard job and calls Steve. So the job starts and boy o boy, what the fuck is going on in this movie-

First of all, I was very excited when I saw that Matpat got a cameo as a waiter, I audibly gasped when I saw him on the movie screen, what makes this even funnier is that I literally told my boyfriend who sat next to me that Matpat would probably get a seizure from this movie's storyline (also something that I havent paid attention to in the theater is that his name tag says "Ness", someone on youtube pointed that out and this makes the cameo 100x more ironic, if you know, you know), I think he deserved it 100% and I was pretty sad Markiplier at the end didn't make it into the cameo because of Iron Lung.

I gotta admit, I fell into the flaw that I thought the story will be a part of the main things that happen in the game and thats why some aspects of the movie left me very very confused. For example, we found out Vanessa is the daughter of William Afton. The fans speculated that there might be some sort of relation between them after Security Breach came out, but I dont remember if anyone thought he's her father, only maybe her grandfather or something. Just so you know, in this movie, Mike and William are not related (or at least doesnt look like they are) and my boyfriend had the idea that this movie might be about Mike Schmidt, which is a very og character in the fnaf games/community, who in this story, isnt Michael Afton, this could explain why his sister is called Abby and not Elizabeth either.

Speaking of Abby, she also left me a bit confused. We found out that her imagined and invisible friends are actually the ghost children that haunt the robots and she can communicate with them through her drawings. I was left a bit dissapointed that they didn't explain how this works exactly, especially because I personally liked the aspect that the robots arent malicious and that theyre still just traumatized children who were manipulated.

Of course, nobody was suprised by the fact that William who said he was Steve, was the villain and oh boy, Matthew Lillard KILLED it as William Afton. As someone, who's childhood wasnt just FNAF but also Scooby Doo, this man is literally the face of many many childhoods, including mine. He didn't get enough screentime AT ALL, even though I dont really mind, because its nice that Afton wasnt the main focus of the story, but Matthew was so good, so talented that I wanted more and more.

Josh Hutcherson as Mike was also awesome in this role, he's relatable, he's flawed yet a very sympathetic character and you cant help but root for him.

These two were the stars of this movie, however Piper Rubio as Abby was also pleasant in my opinion, I thought her character was sweet and lovable and I hated how the guys on the front row were mocking everything she said. Elizabeth Lail as Vanessa was also.. okay? I didn't like Vanessa's presence in the movie at all, because it was very confusing, but she was pretty okay in the role. The ghost children werent that good in my opinion, the acting was very small and Garret's actor had only one face through the entire movie, he didn't have any dialouge either.

Speaking of dialouge, I didn't like it at all. It felt like someone trying to grasp and mimic how people talk to each other, some dialouges were almost ridiculous and NO, if you havent watched the movie but still read my blog post, no, the phrase "Together we're fnaf" does not appear in the movie sadly.

In conclusion, did I dislike this movie? No. Not at all.

In fact, I enjoyed this movie very much. I was a bit of than a casual fan of this game franchise since 2016 and it was a great experience to dress up with my boyfriend and watch the Five night's at Freddy's movie, because we were and are both fans of this game. The bad habit everyone fell into is that we were fixated on the "lore accuracy" and missed the fact that this is more than probably a spinoff, using lore from the books instead of the games.

It was really nice to see this movie and I dont think anyone who wasnt a fan of this game growing up will watch and/or appreciate this movie because its like Barbie but for weird kids and I think its flop among critics is just the Mario movie all over again, where the fans are praising the movie and its story to the roof but the critics just sat into a cactus or something.

Anyways, I'm curious what you guys think of the movie, let me know if you had any opinions and until next time, see ya.

[toytulini]

I saw Barbie last night, I dont think i have a long film review of it for yall but idk I'll put some thoughts under a readmore I guess?

-Right off the bat, I enjoyed it, it was fun. It was a fun pink poppy romp. Thats about what I expected of it, and thats pretty much what I got

-Its not particularly radical in its gender/feminism takes, its very basic, which, I saw a number of ppl mention that before I saw it so I wasnt expecting anything radical. It couldve done better. it was. fine. im shrug about it i guess.

-My mom enjoyed it and was apparently not expecting any sort of emotional depth or story at all so it caught her off guard. I heard her crying. she cries easy at movies. I'm glad my mom liked it. Maybe she'll absorb some of the very basic feminism it drops idk.

-I knew the Kens adopted patriarchy and introduced it to Barbieland but it felt lile that happened very fast, idk.

-The ending....I. is her going to a gynecologist supposed to be like. shes gotten a vagina by deciding to be human?? or is she trying to schedule a surgery or something? that felt pretty weird to me if im honest, i thought it was gonna be a job interview or smth... Especially with how everyone was like "Barbie is ace (heheeh i agree) cos she has no genitals! (sorry what. excuse me. wanna run that by me again?)" like okay that makes that headcanon reasoning even more dewply uncomfortable that it already was?

-I enjoyed weird Barbie. i wish theyd cast someone else cos iirc ka/te mckin/non was a transmisogynist? unless she apologized or said she changed her mind on the topic since like 2017?? but i havent seen anything? idk. just. annoying to keep platforming these ppl. i guess theres probably other actors involved that have shit views of trans ppl. whatever i guess.

-I did dress up a little. i feel like my outfit had Weird Barbie Vibes. maybe ill post a pic.

-I did enjoy it and it had a number of shots and or transitions i liked, i think the one with the disco ball to the moon or whatever was enjoyable.

-god we really are so weird about barbie

-it just feels factually incorrect that all dolls pre barbie were baby dolls? idk. im sure it was the most common kind. but idk. not to be weird about The History Of Dolls but like. the porcelain dolls from the Victorian era. idk if those count as baby dolls. iirc those were to help young girls practice prepping dead bodies of loved ones for funerals or smth??? but i guess porcelain dolls have a sort of babyish look about them. and are fragile so you cant play rough with them.

-Like i Know its a 2hr long toy commercial for mattel but also god that cant be right. even if they werent filling the same niche as barbie as idk basically a fashion doll? there had to be other dolls right?

-I know the flat foot thing is Supposed to be over the top and silly for them all to get upset about but also tbh. as a bitch with falling arches the way some of yall make jokes about flat feet still is uh. well. rude. but also lmao man. the day my arches started hurting for no reason while i was barefoot did sorta feel emotionally like her feet falling to the ground lol.

-i want to introduce barbie to margot robbie's harley quinn owo. i think that would be Fun :3

-i want Ken's job. how do i do Beach as an occupation.

-I actually liked how they handled Ken and Barbie's rship til the end. i feel weird about that ending overall and also it feels weak wrt her dynamic as Ken. they make him grapple w her not reciprocating his feelings the same way but then she just leaves barbieland anyway?? and ig they dont get to explore a friendship or qpr dynamic. ok. its fine i guess.

-her saying she has no genitalia felt so transgender in a way im not sure it was intended to. ken saying he has all of the genitalia felt even more transgender. headcanoning them both as extremely transgender in fun weird new ways and no one can stop me.

-Allan is my favorite character i think. bro me too

-bibbleless movie. add bibble.

[heart-strong]

the list of men i have shouted "i love one man" to during the shows

1. my cat, not from a tv show, but i love this cat so much hes a pretty cool cat his name is kylo ren and has the facial structure of kylo ren and he really is the vibe

Sits around all day watching twitch streamers and anime with my sister all day and when I say all day i mean all day 10 am in the morning to 10 at night.

2. dr spencer reid

do i need to explain my whole blog was based on him for over a year. also he's just like me a small (i do still love him when he thickness in the later seasons) anxious bisexual nonbinary with a hyper fixation we decided to go to college for and no ability to do sports. Also neurodivergent and childhood trauma.

3. amajiki

this my hero acidemia boy just radiates the same energy I radiate. have you seen him in the entirety of season 5 episode 1 he is too precious for this world.

4. finn hudson

this man is just a giant dork, and glee was never the same I genuinely will rewatch his little expressions and one-liners during season 3 because it is so good. I mean go and watch season three of glee and watch Finn the whole time

I would like to say that kurt is my favorite male character but i am not sexually attracted to him.

but I will be a happy person if you just give me the hudson-hummel boys

5. leo roth

if you saw red band society you would understand but also he is sometimes a dick but i'm not anything if i'm not attracted to slightly toxic men

this man is so sweet and I just dream about how he would of grown if the show was picked up for a second season. if you havent watched red band society i recommend it.

6. stiles stalinski

ill point you to the god-awfulness that is season 6 of teen wolf dylan obrien and stiles made that show and i would like to cuddle

when this man is on the screen the eyes go to him and he is just so funny the show just got bland when he left and when he show up with lydia in those last few episodes it was perfection.

but also I would never take him away from lydia they are perfect for each other and I love them, can I have a threesome, please?

we also ignore the shit show that was the movie.

7. shoyo hinata

this little ginger fireball has my entire heart and I would like to lift him above my head for him to win even though it is definitely against the rules

8. Camoron Goodkin

yo stichers was this weird show that I didn't think anyone watched and then jake or logan paul showed up and I stopped watching but before that cameron was my everything. I have since finished it and feel the same feelings for cameron.

camoron goodkin has a heart condition just like me and it's actually kinda accurate and he had a scar like mine and the younger me was like “oh my god i can find love” because Cameron got a sexy blond and i wanted a sexy blond.

9. Bow

I love how he’s so smart and dumb at the same time. Also his shoe tread is little hearts I mean that’s everything. Go watch she ra all of the characters are adorable and I would take a fucking bullet for them.

10. nick nelson

I read the comics way before the show and then the show came out and I was a goner. he is everything and kit Connor deserves so much better.

11. the greys anatomy boys(and kai)

alex and mark are my everything. complete dicks, or you're supposed to hate them when they come in, and then you fall in love. even though mark comes in on season 2 his time felt so quick this time around I miss him. and alex, come on he's a peds surgeon who is amazing with kids and parents I can definitely understand why the single moms soon.

I'd like to also mention kai bartley but they are not a man but I still love them so much. and I'm counting it because they get to kiss amelia shepherd and I'd like to kiss amelia shepherd. but do not think that just because I'm mentioning them on this list it means I'm ignoring their identity because i am not. i'd just like another threesome or poly situation with them.

that's my last one for now. i might add later.

[echo-delta]

hi hi hi just wanted to pop in :) havent sent an ask and a while and felt like itd be fun!!!!

any spiderverse thoughts lately? i read your fics and theyre fricking lovely

also! just watched nimona and ohhhhh the light symbolism! the colors!!!! NIMONA!!!!! also hehe gay

Heyyyyy how have you been??

I've been good <3 and yeah you know me I'm always having spiderverse thoughts. I don't think I've stopped thinking about Earth-42 since I saw atsv. But also I have been having shipping thoughts, which is a very new thing for me. I'm probably going to have to dig up There's Nothing Here To See and add more to it because the brainrot has been consuming me. Aaron and Peter B. were made for each other. They're so SIMILAR but both of them would rather DIE than admit it and yet they're different enough that they can learn from each other but they're both so damaged that they won't let each other in and and and---

(Also I always love seeing you in my comments you're the best!)

I've also been thinking about starting to write original fiction as well which is Scary but also exciting. I don't have much experience with making up a guy to be weird about, rather than being weird about guys that have already been made up. (Character creation is weird that's what I'm trying to say)

NIMONA! Gosh I love Nimona too. Hehe gay hehe trans hehe <3 Ballister is such a wet cat and I love him. And some of the lines from that movie were so unexpectedly raw. "Sometimes I just want to let them"?? are you kidding me?? Just. Oh my god.

[explodie]

anyone else in love with bakugo this fine evening

[arkhamknightz]

replacement

↳ in which, your brother dustin hears a conversation about him between you and robin

pronouns: they/them used but kinda implied sister

warnings: sad older sibling reader, sad dustin, happy ending, hurt/comfort, little brother dustin Smile

notes: i wanted to write dustin sibling angst Hehehehehehh

you quietly sobbed while speaking to robin on the phone. “he hates me robin! god its like im not even here anymore you know?” you knew dustin and steve were bestfriends. they had been since everything with the upside down started.

you and dustins relationship hadnt been the same after that. you watched as your brother seemed to forget about you, walking ahead with steve dropping raw meat on the train tracks. you shook your head and softly smiled shaking away the sad feeling bubbling in your stomach.

you knew you were being irrational at the time, dustin having another guy to talk to would be good for him. you watched with a small smile as the two interacted, the smile fading into a frown over the next 3 years.

dustin had always went to steve instead of you. anytime he wanted to go somewhere he always asked steve, he went to steve about advice for girls, he went to steve when he was upset. its like you weren’t even there anymore.

more tears ran down your face as you thought about dustin forgetting about your movie nights. he stopped asking you to play dnd with him and his friends, he stopped sneaking into your room late at night to ask if you wanted to have ice cream with him.

robin listened as you cried, a frown on her face. “hey, im sure it’ll be okay. he’s just a teenage boy, talk to him about it. he’s just hanging out with steve because he needs advice. you know?”

dustin walked through the hallway, he was about to open the door to his room before he heard you crying. he furrowed his eyebrows and looked through the crack in your door, listening to your conversation.

his heart broke as your body shook as you sobbed into your hand. “this feels different. i really do think he hates me.” your voice cracked before continuing. “its like im just some ghost who lives in this damn house. hes completely replaced me with steve, robin. i mean i cant compete with that? maybe i just havent been a good older sibling i dont know. i just miss my little brother.”

guilt spread through his body, tears welling up in his own eyes as he saw how wet your sleeves were from crying. he knew he hadn’t spent much time with you but he didn’t realize how much time. he was about to walk into your room before he heard what you had to say next.

“i just feel like somehow you’ve gotten closer to dustin than i have been in so long. i mean hell i didn’t even know about suzie until you mentioned her last week! and last summer at the mall.. he immediately ran to see if you and steve were okay like i hadn’t been there too. sometimes i wonder if he would’ve even noticed if i ended up dead in there.”

dustin held a hand over his mouth listening and quietly cried. did he really do that? he thought about that night and remembered seeing you in the corner of his eye. you were watching as he ran over, your face falling as he quickly hugged steve and robin asking if they were alright.

he remembered getting home a week later, seeing you covered in cuts and bruises as you sat on the edge of the bath cleaning your wounds. he was gonna ask if you were alright after he came back from saying bye to the byers. he walked into his room and called lucas, asking if he wanted to bike together. completely forgetting about you when he came back.

he heard you hang up the phone and cry. he waited a minute before he knocked on the side of your door, listening as you sniffled and shuffled on the bed before saying it was open.

you turned around and smiled “hey mom whats u- oh.. hi dustin.” you looked surprised to see him. barely noticing the tears on his cheek as he pulled you into a large hug.

“im so sorry” he cried into your shoulder holding you tightly. you held onto him and looked at him confused until it all fell on you. he heard. “h-how much did you hear?” dustin looked at you with tears running down his face. “enough of it.”

your heart broke as he cried in front of you. sitting on your bed you pulled him down next to you. “hey hey. its my fault alright?” you looked at him with tears in your eyes. “i know i havent really been the best ol-” dustin cut you off, talking through his tears.

“no. no y/n ive been such a terrible brother. i shouldve noticed all the times you came out of your room crying after i came home from hanging out with steve. i shouldve ran to you first and asked if you were okay instead of steve and robin. you couldve died that night and i didnt realize it because i was too caught up in my own stuff and im so sorry.”

he let out a sob pulling you into another hug. you started crying into his shoulder aswell. both of you had sat there for a few minutes, crying as you held eachother. he looked at you sadly, tears running down his face.

“im so sorry. i dont hate you.” his heart shattered as you started sobbing harder at the sentence. “i dont hate you at all. youve been such a good older sibling and i ditched you for steve and im so sorry about that.” you looked at him and sniffled wiping your eyes.

“its okay. please do not ever be sorry dustin. i get it, youre a teenage boy. you have a cool older guy friend.” you let out a small chuckle. “i get it. hes cool kiddo. he really is. and im glad hes been there for you. ive just really really missed my little brother.” you cried, tears ran down your face as you looked at dustin. his face matching yours.

“ive missed you too. a lot, even if it took me forever to realize how much i did. im sorry for everything ive done the last 3 years.. im sorry for ditching you on your last few birthdays to hang out with my friends. and im really sorry for making you feel like you were replaced.”

you laughed. “its alright. just promise me pretty boy harrington isnt ever gonna replace me?” you looked at him. “nobody could ever replace you.” he smiled.

-

you and dustin were sat together on the couch, watching star wars. the phone rang and dustin looked at you before getting up. he awnsered the phone. “hey! steve whats up?” he pretended not to notice as your face slightly fell at the name, continuing his conversation.

“uh yeah id love to hang out but im kinda watching star wars with y/n.” you couldnt stop the smile that appeared on your face as you heard the conversation.

“listen man ive got about 3 years to make up with them right now. call me back in about a year or so.” he hung up the phone and sat down with you. “shall we continue?”

steve smiled from the other side of the phone, high fiving robin. “did they fix it?” steve nodded with a smile. “yep! henderson siblings are peacefully reunited and im pretty sure we wont be hearing back from dustin for another year..” robin smiled widely. “ im really glad they figured it out, now. peace and quiet!” she cheered.

the bell chimed at the front of the family video store. lucas, max, mike, will and el standing at the front of the counter. robin glanced back at steve and sighed. “i stand corrected.”

[nnajiro]

sano manjiro x reader♡▪︎~`×-'

warnings?none

feeling for him?toomany;-;

a/n: the very first meeting of you, and sano manjiro. [this happens around the time emma came into their family, so mikey would be 5 years old since emma is 4 y.o.]

your parents have left japan for business in korea, leaving you alone with your grandma. she loved the fact that you showed interest in art, so she always took you to beautiful places you could try to paint by! lovingly watching you from a bench not too far away but far enough to have your intimacy as an artist

you really loved whenever you got the chance to paint new landscapes, especially beautiful temples as the one you get to paint today.

the musashi shrine, it has such nice cold but still warming colors making your eyes flutter at how you think the paint will come out.

but still since you dont have that many years of experience, heck since you are 5 years old the paintings do come out childishly cute but still good enough for that age.

you sat down nicely not infront of it to get into someone's feet but at its left side, with a nice white canvas sketching its lines.

"yeah and I always told you that I can run faster than a dog, so just bet your money on me i will win that"

someone who seemed proud of himself claimed loudly, walking behind you with heavy steps. you looked back to see who would be so proud to win against a dog and saw a small boy with blonde hair, walking alongside a taller one with black hair

you laughed at their conversations but stopped when you noticed that they dropped money on the ground, you picked them up and jogged to catch up to them

"oh, excuse me. you dropped your money"

they both looked behind at you simultaneously and noticed the resemblance of color between their eyes

"oh man, thanks"

the blonde boy said as he took his money from your hands nicely, you couldn't help but stare at him, such black eyes matched up with blonde hair? he must be a lucky one with girls

"uh? do i know you?"

but oblivious as you are, you couldn't notice the stare he kept on you aswell. moments of silence layed between you two, like a staring contest someone blinked in the end

"oh, um no i dont think so"

you could hear the dark haired boy chuckle at the blonde one, catching a glare from him to stop with that laughter, the idea of brothers popped into your head seeing their friendship

"whats your name?"

your heart made a flip, you waited a second before recollecting your thoughts. you said briefly but a bit louder your name, to let him know how to corectly pronounce it since it is a foreign name

"oh you are a foreigner? your smile makes your eyes so little i though you were asian!"

he said laughing, becoming friendlier faster than you'd expect. you just laughed what he said off and just watched as the dark haired one patted him on the back

"im manjiro! wait, what elementary school are you from?"

you began wondering why is the conversation still going, noticing how friendly he is you just accepted it and kept going too, since you love someone who cannot make you awkward with the silence

"i am from the seventh!"

his face went in awe and the dark haired one couldnt help but look surprised, which just made you curious about why those faces?

"im from the seventh school too! how come i havent seen you before?"

the conversation went on until his brother like you learned said that they should go

"See ya later!"

you waved at him as he left your gaze. you couldnt help but smile, making a friend that easy? thought it was only in movies this way.

[we all know a see ya later from mikey means we are friends forever now]