#have to get up at 6am tomorrow
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Night time ramble time. What did I do today? Can't remember. No wait, ordered groceries. I woke up very tired but over the day that went away a bit and I was actually able to write a couple of parts for the Knightstones, I'll need to play with them before I can write anymore.
Also got a part sorted for Glenn, the intro of Henri. Officially on countdown for you meeting the twins as they'll be in his next post, I'm excited. I've got maybe one more part worth of screenshots and am thinking about which coven members we'll meet in game next. Plus I mean brainstorming how to slide in Silver since he's going to be very important.
I have a few Struck By Love posts I need to draft but golly, I'm terrible at cutting down on the cute. I apologize that the pace is much slower than I expected but in my defense I didn't expect Byron to be so cute. Oh that reminds me last night I had a nightmare that like 4 of my moots named baby sims Byron and I had a panic because I already have trouble keeping on top of all the sims called Atlas that appear on my dash, as well as several blonde sims that my face blindness has convinced me are the same sim.
#ramble ramble ramble#faceblindness#my constant nemesis#alongside fatigue#I feel like there's a bunch I've forgotten to do#like tag games#or respond to messages#but I just keep forgetting#have to get up at 6am tomorrow#am not mentally prepared#reminder that I'm on a medical certificate for this fatigue#I always worry people think I'm lazy#not you people#but the irl people
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i just wanted to draw the ave mujica outfits .
#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#nenekasa#<- i like them.#sorry i like mygo + avemuji but cant make fanart of anything im not Fucking Crazy about normally#had to touch it up digitally because i tried coloring a Pen Drawing in with Watercolor. in earnest.#Everything think the announcements gonna be a new unit. I think that would be hilarious and the worst possible timing#Given where everyone else's arcs are but the miku design looked cute so if its jsut a new game that would cheese me#My tag blabbering... what else ... im artfight slacking. my wrist hurts. course selection is next week. SCREAMS#please pray to God i do not have any 8am classes. PLEASE. my college commute takes over an hour. If i have to wake up at 6am i will k#Oh my God i have to go to the dentist tomorrow too please fucking helpme THEYRE GONAN FIDN AMILLION CAVITIES AND KILL ME. AAAAAHG.#Every time theres another proseka broadcast announced i get scared cause i have so many song covers i want in the game but.#I want to draw them first. So that if they Do get added to the game i cna go HEH... >:)....#Thats whyi did skeleton orchestra emnn and scissorhands rks. I want scissorhands in the game reallybad i love that song#3DMV EVEN PLEEEASE but also nothing can too miumes choreography from like a decade ago i wanna do a cosplay performanc eof it someday...#i ❤️ waacking.#actually the one i Really want to draw is ALSO nenekasa. record red save me. ILL DRAW IT OK
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🢔 Click for better quality 🢖
Paratober day #9: Freedom.
Last one is rushed. I still like it. Two different types of freedom. Neither are ever good.
One is fleeting, forced and slips right through your fingertips. The other is lonely. Daunting.
Loneliness is a type of freedom. Stanley wants freedom from the Narrator. In a sense, the skip button gave him that freedom he craved. You'd think he got what he wanted. But this wasn't the type of freedom he wanted.
#simon draws#the unmotivated parable#the stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#tsp#tspud#the stanley parable: ultra deluxe#tsp stanley#stanley tsp#tspud stanley#stanley tspud#tsp:ud stanley#stanley tsp:ud#stanley parable#the skip button#freedom ending#lol it's almost 1am and i have to get up at 6am tomorrow (today)#fml#paratober2023#paratober#paratober day 9#paratober freedom
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my autistic ass when i would try to explain to my non-autistic writer friends how my ocs don’t just feel like characters/plot devices/narrative tools, they feel like fully fledged people that just live inside my brain who i just have access to for some reason and the stories i write are merely a snapshot into their fully fledged personhood/lives. and that that these feelings don’t mean i’m unaware of my role/agency/responsibility as the writer who has the final say in these characters and how they are written it just means that my writing process feels very intuitive and i can only describe it as “listening” and “getting to know” these people that just live inside my brain in a way that i don’t feel like i can completely elaborate on. and because of this i would actually consider these characters “real” in their own way because the impact and influence they have had on me as a person beyond just my writing is so real and not having them would feel like i’m missing a part of myself
#DISCLAIMER! when i say autistic i do not mean this is an exclusively autistic experience or that every autistic person will experience this#i mean that its my autism that makes me not just have my characters be my special interest but also feel so intensely about them#and why i have sometimes felt weird talking about my characters with people because i am just experiencing ocs in a different way#to them#also i think one time when i tried to explain this to someone they thought i literally meant that i felt my characters were real#and when i look back on moments like that i am like beloved you need to get yourself some autistic friends#also its 10pm and ive been up since 6am and this was a very emotionally heavy day so im about to post this and log out and we'll see how#tomorrow me feels about that#but anyways the point of this post is i did not realise this was not universal and felt kinda weird about it for a while until i realised#that it is just the autism and i was like wow this is actually very cool of me i think actually#yesterday my bf sent me song links and was like i feel like felix would listen to these#and ive been thinking about this ever since hence the post because that made me so happy bc i was like i feel like you're seeing him as a#real part of me the way i see him as a real part of me
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agitated and restless in like 200 different ways. maybe i go to bed early tn
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I start my new job tomorrow!! I've spent most of my working life in food service, which I honestly don't mind, but I've been wanting to do something more, and I'm now Marketing at an art center!! I get to be creative, I get a set schedule, I get better pay and hopefully more respect. Most recently I worked at McDonald's, so this is a big change!! But omg I'm so excited
#the only downside is having to wake up at 6am#thats gonna be rough#but its four days a week. set hours for rhe most part#a dollar than mcdonalds more with raises twice a year#i get to run social media and design posters and being posters to businesses#food service is a good job and its a job I wouldnt mind having forever#but this feels like a step in the rught direction for how i want my life to go#im sure i wont be as delighted tomorrow when im waking up at 6am. but for now im feeling great!!
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//bro santa got me fucking pinkeye for christmas... he shouldn't have.... he really, really shouldn't have...
#ooc#illness //#ask to tag#i guess coal just doesn't cut it for the naughty list anymore smh#literally awake at fucking 6am because i could NOT sleep bc of this shit#i slept like One Hour and woke up at 3#and i had to fucking call into work so there's another fucking $100 off my next check#not even counting the work i'll probably have to miss to get over it#gonna see if i can see a dr tomorrow... which will be Yet More Money i lose#god i really can't catch a break thsi fucking month huh#at least i get paid tomorrow bc i have fucking. 10 bucks. right now#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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That feeling when it’s 10:30pm on Friday night and you’re already in bed instead of writing… I’m getting old, aren’t I?
#what’s even going on#for my defense - I did get up at 6am after less than full 6h of sleep#and then I’ve spent eight long hours in the office and three more at a Christmas work party#but like… I’m annoyed at myself#I’m absolutely beat#personal bs#here’s to having more luck tomorrow I guess#not that my writing is particularly anticipated so it might as well take three months tho
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happy jingle jam (in 2 minutes!) - i hope my fellows in unfortunate timezones manage to catch the streams they want!
#i have university tomorrow and i have to get up at 6am to get there but. i wanna catch a stream that starts at 3am *and* the office cam one#so#im gonna have a bad time tomorrow probably#phosphor makes noises
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Me trying to ignore im living in the worst 72 hours of my year: everything will be fine i have Edward Said, fanon and achille m'bembe by my side
#im losing it trying to read 100 pages after the work day i had then i have to be up at 6am tomorrow so i can get by 2pm where i need to be#probably hungry and sleepy af to do the most for this exam
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it's late and im tired but my brother asked for tabletop advice so here, I'll just copy +paste it for you folks too.
DMing:
nudging rules is fine as a dm if it serves the story more strongly. better to leave the players wanting more and recounting an epic moment than "oh yeah the numbers didn't go your way so, TPK."
(supplemental: Party Kills can be great if done well. I recommend, if you really want to make players squirm in any game, pick them off one by one, and let some of them truly hope they'll survive. If they catch on that they're destined to die too soon (repetitive pattern of deaths etc), it might fall flat. Let them have small wins, find useful items, crawl their way up just enough to breathe a breath of fresh air...then hook em with the twist of their mortal end. Make it satisfying!)
Visualizing/designing a character, particularly as a player but this can work for NPCs and non-tabletop guys as well:
1. consider the class/background of your character. Where are they from? What do they do most of the time? What are they skilled at? These things inform what tools they carry and what they wear. What they find practical, and how willing they are to favor either practicality or fashion, etc.
2. consider the personality. how do they express themselves, if at all? Do they have colors they like? Sensibilities that remind them of home or someone they love, a patron, a creature? If your character grew up raising birds for example, maybe they wear feathers! Maybe they own a falconeer's glove. stuff like that
3. consider the character's goal(s). what do they Want, what are they Working towards, what is their Mission? maybe they might have a visual tell for that, like a curse they're wanting to get rid of or a weapon they're wielding that's meant to be delivered somewhere
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flying to spain only had 1 glass of wine & ive a layover in amsterdam on the way … but its fucking like 9hr layover on the way back from - at NIGHT 😭😭😭
#stream#need to find a late night coffee shop#@ amsterdam ppl do they sell weed at like midnight & is it close to the airport#flying KLM that’s why 😭😭😭#have. a 6am bus tomorrow to léon then back to madrid @ 2p arrive at 7p then wake up & the flight from madrid is at 8p the following day#so i gotta figure out what to do for a few hrs before that flight#literally going to leon SOLELY to get tattooed & then go back to madrid#THE WHOLE REASON IM GOING TO SPAIN IS TO GET A TATTOO ALSKALSKALSKALSKLASKLAKSLA#LITERALLY MY PLAN IS JUST THAT: get tattoo go back home#i’m sorry dutch isn’t a real language it always makes me laugh so fucking HARD it’s just MUMBLING
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Shoutout to my mom
#so my school is like. an hour away so when mom drives to work that’s when we have to get ready for school no matter how early#I just wish she’d give me more heads up#bro this is the second time she told me we’d need to be there at like 6am at 10pm#like girl I’m not even done my homework I’m gonna die there’s no way I’m getting enough sleep#I also don’t want to look like shit and super tired tomorrow because it’s picture day#I also need to shower#urgh#and I know her job is important but like. a bit more heads up would be nice#vent#fucking rambling
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i’d like to be more active on here but it’s like everyone isn’t active either bc we are all getting sick of this place/busy with life lol
#idk what to tell you i just wanna think and talk about these goofy goobers#arina.txt#i have to get up at 6am tomorrow </3
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#i shouldnt even be awake bc i have to get up at 6am tomorrow#but here i am overthinking to the point where im just making my self spiral#today is my brothers birthday who passed away in 2016#and i cant stop thinking about my close friend who also passed#and now im just thinking about the friendships i have and the relationships i have with people#just feeling very unloved and exhausted right now i know the feeling will pass#but tonight its hitting particularly hard#no one has to read this its just something i need off my chest#ok goodnight all
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:-P
#this user has been trapped in the lab for... over 12hrs now#almost done. like 10 min left. and i have to get up at 6am and come back in before 7.30#and itll be at least anothet 10hrs? tomorrow and Sunday and Monday#and thrn i have 2 meetings Tuesday and i have to make media#my mum wanted to send me food for easter and i dont think ill have the time for that#this is not fun. maybe ill listen to black swan by th0m yorke a million times tomorrow bc its cathartic to hear someone say#this is fucked up. fucked up. over and over#unrelated#me
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