#have a great chemistry and you're left wanting to see more of them. there are some interesting cameos. lipman steals

[bree-peasant]

One for the Ages - a Kakashi x fem!Reader fic

Chapter 5/5

(Back to Chapter 1, Chapter 4)

Author's note: Thank you guys for following this series! Although this is the last chapter, I have more ideas for these two, so might revisit in the future. In the meantime, if anyone has any requests, I'd be excited to try prompt writing! I hope you enjoy the ending, happy reading! <3

Word count: 2.4k

Summary (from part 1): A new shinobi joins the Konoha ranks and Kakashi finds himself inexplicably drawn to her. Gai also appears in this one!

Warnings: none in this chapter!

Enjoy! ♡

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Kakashi had tried his best to put Y/N out of his mind throughout the day, but the thought kept pestering him. He kept imagining her laugh, throwing her head back at something Genma said, and he would almost see red at the thought of it. Even worse, the idea of the two of them hooking up, would send him spiralling. As the evening drew nearer, he selfishly decided he needed to intervene.

He felt so guilty spying on them, as they stumbled towards her flat, but more than anything, he was annoyed at the fact that she'd invited him back. Deep down he knew how unfair and irrational his actions were, but he just couldn't stop himself from pressing further.

He hadn't even dropped his book the previous night. He just needed an excuse to interrupt their evening. Kakashi had used a substitution jutsu on a random box he'd found hiding under her bed, in support of his alibi. Despite his shame at how low he had stooped, part of him felt a sense of satisfaction from stepping in and showing the other jōnin who's territory this was. Then again, he had no right to claim Y/N as his own.

Burdened by these contradicting thoughts, Kakashi fled to his usual haunt - the park bench, where he'd bumped into her all those nights ago.

Back at her flat, Y/N sat down heavily. Although feeling mostly sober by now, her thoughts were at a disarray. She was upset by Genma's departure, she thought they had great chemistry and felt disappointed by his easy surrender. Having said that, she couldn't entirely blame the guy. Kakashi's notoriety followed him around, the awful nickname 'friend-killer' on everyone's minds when he walked passed. She wasn't afraid of him, but she could understand Genma not wanting to get on his bad side.

Oh, Kakashi. Just thinking about his antics earlier made her furious. What was he playing at, storming in there like that, pretending he'd spent the night with her. The more she played the scene over in her head, the more riled up she became. His nonchalant tone and sarcastic manners burned inside her mind's eye. He must've done it on purpose. But for what reason?!

Starting to feel herself go crazy, Y/N decided that she needed to confront the gray-haired trickster. And she knew exactly where to find him.

Unsurprisingly, he was in the park as if expecting her. She stormed towards him, unconcerned by the late hour.

"What the hell was that back there?" She demanded, letting her anger loose on him.

"I don't know what you mean." Kakashi acted casual, not looking up from his book.

"Oh please! You and I both know you have a million copies of that book, stashed in your house. This was deliberate!"

"I take it he's left, seeing as you're here, shouting at me."

"I'm not..." she had to consciously lower her voice. "I'm not shouting at you. And yes, what did you expect after that scene you caused. How did you even know he was there?!"

"I hear things." His sarcasm was infuriating.

"Why, Kakashi? What could you have possibly had to gain from embarrassing me like that?"

"Well, if you must know, Genma's a notorious playboy. I didn't think he was good enough for you." He replied, trying to convince himself as much as her that this had been his motivation.

She was astounded by his audacity. Recovering her composure, she spat back at him:

"Frankly, that's none of your business!"

"As your friend, I thought it my duty to intervene and..."

"No!" She cut him off, losing her nerve entirely. "You lost any authority over my lovelife the second you refused to be the focus of it." Her voice was no longer angry, but riddled with sorrow. Refusing to let herself fall apart in front of him, Y/N turned around and ran back to her flat, leaving a guilt-riddled Kakashi behind.

"Oh, boy...what have I done." He sighed into the night.

His earlier satisfaction from achieving his goal had completely disappeared, substituted by shame and regret. He'd recognised the hurt in her voice, forcing him to realise how he'd toyed with her tonight. He put his head in his hands in desperation.

One thing remained unclear to him; why had he done it? He'd acted almost impulsively, refusing to acknowledge a simple truth. Whether he wanted to or not, he was finally faced with an answer - he'd been jealous. Of course, he knew he had feelings for her, but he'd tried so hard to repress them for fear of losing her like so many before, that he'd hardly acknowledged them. And now... In his ignorance, he'd acted foolishly and threatened to lose her anyway.

"I have to fix this." He said to himself, still unsure of his next move.

Over the next few days, the rookie genin teams competed in the preliminary round of the chunin exam, where their numbers were significantly depleted. The remaining kids would go on to face each other in the finals, a month later. The Hokage called an assembly of all chunin and jōnin of the village.

"As you all know, many influential lords and politicians will be joining us during the final stage of the chunin exam. We need to showcase not only our village's strength, but our financial merits as well." The Hokage spoke.

"This is why, we are hosting an event to gain new investors, who will support our shinobi training program. It'll be held in one week, and I have personally invited some of the wealthiest merchants and title holders. I expect you all to attend and work towards charming our guests."

Great, Y/N thought, she only had a month to prepare Shino for the final matches, and now this.

None of the attendees seemed particularly pleased by the news, but one look at the Hokage's stern expression, and they all knew they had to do what was expected of them.

Leaving the meeting auditorium, it was Kakashi's turn to pull Y/N aside.

"Can we talk?" He said. Seeing her reluctance, he added a please at the end of his question.

She sighed and led him to a corner in the hallway, where it was quiet. They hadn't spoken to each other since that awful argument, but it still felt as fresh as the night it happened.

"Y/N, you have to know how sorry I am. I acted stupidly and things got out of control. I never meant to hurt you, truly." Kakashi looked genuinely remorseful as he spoke.

She'd planned on staying mad at him, but his sincerity cracked her stern exterior. There was no point in denying it, she had a soft spot for him, and she would forgive anything. But things couldn't go on like this.

She took a deep breath, letting her guard down.

"I want to be your friend, Kakashi, I really do. But I think we should stop with the late nights and surprise visits...both of us." She trailed off, avoiding his eye. She knew he'd be disappointed, upset even. She knew it, because her own heart was breaking as she spoke.

"We've gotten ourselves so emotionally intertwined, I think we can't lay any boundaries anymore."

He didn't interrupted her, didn't argue. How could he, when what she was saying was the truth.

"We can be friendly around each other... just not in the way we have been so far." She concluded.

Kakashi nodded silently. They remained in place for a moment.

"If that is what you want." He finally spoke, then promptly turned around and walked away.

Y/N sighed. What she had wanted was to be with him, but he'd taken that possibility away. Now it seemed they were both hurting.

The following week passed quickly. Between training with Shino and her other jōnin duties, Y/N had hardly any time to dwell on her recent personal drama, and she was glad for it. Only at night, when sleep would undoubtedly evade her, she desperately wished to see him, fighting the urge to seek him out with all her strength.

"It'll get easier." She kept telling herself, never fully believing it.

Kakashi applied himself vigorously to training Sasuke, even teaching him the chidori. He was somber and quiet the rest of the time, which wasn't unusual for the typically withdrawn copy-ninja, or at least so it seemed on the outside. In truth, he was suffering at the loss of Y/N more than he wanted to admit.

He would roam around the village at night, hoping to bump into her, if even for a second, then quickly hiding at the faintest of sounds, ashamed of his actions. He wanted to respect her wishes, yet his heart ached more and more with each day he kept away. He was beginning to realise that the most foolish thing he had done, was deny his feelings for her. He'd shown her everything, up to his rotten core, and she hadn't looked away. Kakashi loved her for that. Kakashi loved her. But wasn't it too late?

The investor event came along. It was to be held in the assembly halls, with live music, drinks and dancing. Although not entirely willing, the village shinobi put on their best clothes and their brightest smiles, to fulfil their duties for their homeland. Even if those duties were to charm the wealthy businessmen and women, whose money they needed.

Y/N wore her best yukata to the event, her hair neatly pinned back and with flowers tucked in it. As she walked into the brightly lit room, she was met by a dazzling Gai.

"Y/N, you're a vision of spring and beauty!" He said, taking her hand in his. "With your good looks and mine, we're sure to get some hearts racing tonight! And some money in our pockets" He whispered the last statement and winked at her.

She giggled at his usual flamboyance and allowed him to lead her away towards some guests. She was listening to a boring conversation between two merchants and politely smiling along, when she spotted Kakashi walking in. He wore a dark grey hakama over his kimono, which made him stand out in the crowd. Her first thought was how handsome he looked, but she quickly scolded herself over it and instead motioned a wave, when he looked her way. To her surprise, Kakashi didn't respond, but quickly ducked and disappeared amongst the pool of people. She wondered if he maybe hadn't seen her.

As the night began unfolding, music started playing and couples came out on the dance floor. Suddenly, Y/N found herself swarmed with suitors, asking her to dance one after the other. Bound to her duty, she obliged the guests, but every time one of them spun her around, her eyes would seek out Kakashi. And without a doubt, every time her gaze fell upon his, he'd turn away.

A group dance was organised, where couples would join in and switch partners at different intervals. An older gentleman, who traded with ships (or so she was told) asked her to dance. She smiled sweetly and offered him her hand, despite feeling exhausted by this point. At least she'd stumbled upon a good dancer, as he expertly led and twirled her around.

Upon switching partners, she was pulled in by a familiar embrace. Kakashi held her tight, as he maneuvered them both swiftly along the dancefloor.

"He dances." She said, feigning surprise.

"Well, when the Hokage's wife drags you out, it's hard to refuse." Kakashi let out a slight chuckle.

She scoffed at that, the cheerful glint in her eyes betraying her true feelings. It was a relief to see him smile again.

"You've been avoiding me tonight." She said matter-of-factly.

Kakashi cleared his throat.

"I'm surprised you noticed with all the men throwing themselves at you." His voice sarcastic, yet strained.

"Does it bother you?" Her eyes widened in curiosity. She couldn't help but push on.

"Of course it bothers me." His sincerity surprised her. Usually with him, it was all cloak and dagger, so why the sudden reveal? She felt the familiar feelings of confusion and hurt rising up in her.

"You must know by now that none of that matters to me." She whispered, loosing the grip on her emotions somewhat.

"And why not?" His gaze intensely focused on her expression, trying to read it.

"Kakashi..." She hesitated.

"I want to hear you say it." He pressed further leaning into her ear, his voice just above a whisper.

Sensing the exhaustion take over, she felt like she was going to crack. It was too much, being so close to him, wondering if he was toying with her again.

"I... I can't do this!" Y/N pulled away from him, running towards the entrance. A few heads turned to look at Kakashi, eyes filled with curiosity. Kurenai ran over to him.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"I better go and check on her." The female jōnin looked concerned.

"No, don't. I'll go after her." He interjected, leaving the dance floor.

Once outside, he spotted her walking away in rushed steps.

"Y/N, wait!" He called after her, running to shorten the distance between them.

She stopped and turned towards him. When he reached her, he could see tears gleaming in the corner of her eyes.

"Wait for what, Kakashi? I can't keeping doing this with you. This back and forth, this game..." She trailed off, her voice shaky.

Kakashi reached his hand and gently wiped her wet cheek.

"Y/N, I've been a fool." Was the only thing he managed to say.

"What on earth do you mean?" She was still angry with him, an anger born out of hurt.

"Denying what my heart has been aching for, this whole time." His palm rested on her cheek, the way hers once had, when he'd shown her the sharingan.

The sorrow in her eyes turned to surprise, then to hope. She leaned into his hand, taking a step closer to him.

"And what is it that you've been aching for?" She asked softly.

Kakashi sighed.

"You know."

"I want to hear you say it." She echoed his words from earlier.

He watched her for a moment, taking in her beautiful, tear-stained face.

"You."

At those words, she closed the remaining distance between them, pulling him into a passionate kiss. Weaving her arms around his neck, his own wrapping around her waist, their bodies intertwined as their lips devoured each other. When they finally pulled back to take a deep breath, they were both smiling widely.

"Take me home, Kakashi." She whispered.

He took her hand in his and led her back, both hearts soaring at the feeling of surrender.

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@duckingmetal @junksmah @jinnyart06 thank you for your support guys <3

[vomitspit2]

concept with floyd leech. (expansion from the mafia universe, pre-NARC)

shit hits the fan frequently in floyd's life.

that is how it has always been. an accumulation of monkey doo-doo that is thrown into the fan blades that lead to things like cars exploding into fiery wrecks, new hues of purple bruises and red cuts on his skin, and tender cheek kisses from the grim reaper. he likes it like this. every day, he gets a little taste of death.

this time, he has taken too big of a bite.

he realizes it on the cusp of weaving in and out of death and life's doors. the epiphany settles in when the cut along the left side of his face is deep enough he can stick his tongue out of it. and, the truth of it is thrown in his face when his captors leave him -- floyd fucking leech -- in his four-walled prison with a gun, not to break himself out but rather 'if you truly won't tell us the information, here's this. we'll allow you the mercy of getting to kill yourself.'

they might as well just take out their cocks and piss on him. this is humiliating. this is beneath him. this is ... going to be the end of the line.

cheek on the grimy ground, he reflects upon that. at least every day, tasting the faint lipstick of the grim reaper under his teeth, he lived how he wanted to, did it his way as good old frank sinatra said.

floyd is humming to himself that jazz tune as he watches pinwheels of colors swirl in his vision and little fireworks of black pop in the skies of a blackout creeping up on him.

jade's gonna be pissed. azul's gonna bitch and bargain. mama's gonna cry. pop's gonna deny. you're gonna ...

you're probably gonna be fine. you and floyd don't know each other that well. you've only known each other for two months. most of that time has been spent going at it like rabbits. the pillow-talk is zilch. not really a relationship of substance where you would have any reason to grieve him.

if anything you're just gonna be sad that you're not getting your world rocked in bed ... floyd huffs a humorless laugh at that. at least the sex was great, mind-blowing chemistry from that first night and he has yet to grown bored.

floyd closes his eyes, cheek leaking an oil puddle of red, trying to conjure up a memory from over these previous two months. if he is going to finally bite the dust, he wants his thoughts to be filled with nothing but the euphoric memory of an orgasm as he bounces you on his cock. a good memory to blanket his dying mind with.

that is not what comes to floyd's mind. instead, he is remembering you sitting criss-cross in your panties, feeding your bunny oswald. floyd stands by your kitchen island, digging earwax out with his shower towel, dripping on your vinyl floor. he watches in the small visible space, bordered by your thigh and elbow, as oswald nibbles up piece after piece of kale. you don't talk to him, expecting him to leave soon.

dying on a warehouse's filthy floor, floyd watches you, entranced in his brain with this continuous motion of you handing piece after piece of kale to oswald. in his mind, the bowl never empties or loses its weight of fullness.

your back is pretty, your hair after sex is nice, your panties are a cute color, you're a real good person who deserves a boyfriend.

i kinda wanna know more about them ... the thought causes his eyes to pop open. all that he sees is a lime-green that bounces in watery waves. it surprises floyd greatly, that sudden thought that he's never had before.

he falls into the thought softly ... i wonder if they have hobbies ... when did they get a bunny ... i wonder i wonder i wonder ... he is still wondering when he puts a new piercing into his captor's chest. he wonders all the way home, wonders what’s your favorite food, do you hate a certain type of entertainment genre, are you a silver or gold jewerly-wearer? he wonders more and more questions — favorite sport; pet-peeves; any special talent like being double-jointed or tying knots in cherry stems, any stupid small things about you he yearns to learn — while azul's doctor (paid with generous hush money) stitches the hole in his face back up.

he holds all his questions until after a week later, after he has given you your second orgasm and him his first orgasm. he is pulling out, flopping on the right side of the mattress, closest to the exit like always.

you are not unnerved by this, panting and soaking in the moment, you barely even look at him.

you jump out of your skin when you feel a finger tucking a stray hair behind your ear. "what are you doing," you gasp, partly from exhaustion and partly from bewilderment.

"hey, shrimpy," your booty call starts slowly and sweetly, "ya got any hobbies?"

it is such a surprising question that you laugh ... until you realize, unnerved, that he is being serious. he is looking at you with round, puppy-dog eyes, waiting to soak in all the information you are going to give him.

you shouldn't tell him anything. information is valuable, you know that. but, there is something in his handsome face that makes you take the leap.

you can't help but be a little loose tongued as you shift onto your side, bare chest squishing on the mattress, a heartbeat pulse between your legs, and both hands sandwiched under your cheek.

"yeah, i do. i like to --"

and that's how it starts.

sometimes, you think you should have kept your mouth shut.

[katuschka]

Blue – Two

Jake Kiszka x reader/f!OC 2.500 words

lovers to enemies to lovers; part two of miniseries

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, intended for adult readers. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental. Also, if you're under 18, go find some other entertainment elsewhere.

Warnings (are spoilers): Yearning, angst, heartbreak, unrequitted (?) love, alcohol consumption, kissing, teasing, Jake being an asshole.

New here? Read Part One first.

Walking out of that pub where I told him my last goodbye really felt like leaving one part of my life behind to start anew, but… that’s not true. When I woke up the next morning, it was still the same city, still the same neighborhood, which we shared, still the same life, which I wanted to keep.

The idea that I would never see him again proved to be foolish. I had to learn to live with the fact that I couldn’t hope to avoid Jake without also having to avoid things and places that made my life colorful before that fateful night when we talked (and more) for the first time.

When I finally creeped out of my bed a few days later, I braced myself and walked out of my door and into the light like a strong woman. It was my life, and I was ready to reclaim it! My favorite coffee shop, the bookstore on the corner, the local record store or Sunday walks in the park… That’s where I saw him three weeks later with his brother. My heartbeat went haywire and I quickly ran away like a coward before they noticed me. Or at least I hoped they didn’t. So much for me being strong, right? I cried again that night, and then I promised myself to try… again.

Since that moment it felt as if the forces of the universe were playing tricks on me. He seemed to be everywhere I set my foot in. 

Sometimes he just didn’t notice my presence or I quickly tried to hide, but more often our eyes met across the room, hall or open space. After some time, he started shaking his head or rolling his eyes everytime we accidentally came across each other again, as if he thought I was doing that on purpose. ‘Just ignore the jerk,’ my best friend Lucy often said, and god knows I tried. 

But the chemistry, oh the chemistry. Just a mere glimpse of him sucked the air out of my lungs every fucking time. He had me on a leash, on a chokehold, like his whining bitch. Pathetic.

It kept driving me crazy. Even after I consciously chose to believe that it was the shared enmity – and not my unrequited love – that kept twisting my stomach everytime I saw him, I still found myself being pulled into his orbit. His was the skin I wanted to taste. His were the eyes I wanted to drown my soul in, just like I had so many times before. I had been trying to convince myself that I had seen a glimpse of the same emotions there, but that had been just the reflection of my high hopes. 

I just wished they would go on tour again; that seemed to be the only hope that I had left. With Jake gone for months, perhaps I could easily find another cock to distract me. And to free me from my misery eventually. 

Because I couldn’t avoid him, and I wouldn’t ever forget him; therefore, indifference was the best outcome I could hope for. 

But that was not meant to be. Not with Jake still around to keep reminding me that no one else was good enough. 

I tried. 

A few of them made it as far as my bed. 

But alas, they were not him. And when they left, I cried. It was not their fault and I couldn’t blame them. It was all on me and how much I still yearned to feel his hot skin pressed to mine. That comforting feeling. No one else seemed to be able to fill the void, and – without it being a conscious decision – I eventually stopped trying. 

“Don’t try to piss me off again. You’re going. End of discussion, babes. It’s such a great opportunity to finally meet someone nice, Blue! The place will be full of interesting people...”

Interesting people… I rolled my eyes, grateful Lucy couldn’t see me through the phone, because that would no doubt result in her giving me yet another lecture on how I can’t keep withdrawing from other people. Deep down I knew she was right. 

I could always count on Lucy to pick up all the remaining pieces of me and at least try to glue them back together. This time, she was trying to convince me to go with her to her step brother’s wedding. Given the fact that Lucy’s step brother worked as a sound engineer, I could only imagine what kind of interesting people would attend. 

Safe to say I was not interested. I honestly dreaded the idea of being a single woman in a room full of tipsy musicians who usually knew one another. AND I was definitely not interested in meeting yet another Dave or Jim or Marcus, whose experience with love was limited to the knowledge that it sounded good in e minor. 

There used to be times when I’d be beyond excited to go, but the new broken and lonely me could no longer fit among the bubbly lot. Heartbreakers, all of them. 

I put her on speaker to pour myself a glass of wine before I responded. “Lucienne, darling, you platonic love of my life, you…” I tried to make her see some sense, without saying aloud that I didn’t really want to meet anyone in the first place. “Interesting or not, people who get invited to weddings usually bring a plus one with them…”

“And? That’s why I want you to go with me.”

“And?” I repeated her stupid question, although it was me who suddenly sounded like an idiot. “Doesn’t sound like a room full of opportunities to me.”

“M’pretty sure a lot of Thomas’ friends are single and they’re just bringing friends, too. Being someone’s plus one doesn’t mean shit.” 

It should, I thought to myself sullenly. It should mean something. “I don’t want to meet anyone new.” 

“Fine,” Lucy sighed exasperatedly. “So just come with me. Ignore everyone else, for all I care, but you can’t ignore your own wellbeing. You’ll dress nice, you’ll smell good, you’ll have a good time. We’ll have a good time. I promise. The place is beautiful. Like a fairytale. ” She was relentless, as always. And I truly admired her for that… most of the time. I reluctantly agreed at last, because I hadn’t felt pretty for quite a while and I honestly liked the idea. 

I arrived quite early that day, and even though Lucy and her family had naturally already been there, the bride and groom both kept them all quite busy and there wasn’t much for me to do. I didn’t mind, though. It gave me the opportunity to wander around the premises a bit and just enjoy the sunny day. 

Lucy had been right. The Castle truly was a beautiful place. Partially hidden behind cedar trees, I almost missed it while I was driving down the Old Hillsboro Road, lost in my own thoughts and feeling young and beautiful in my new flowy chiffon dress. Electric blue, with a dreamy floral pattern decorating the hem of the skirt as well as the long puff sleeves. 

It proved to be a perfect choice for the occasion, and as soon as I got out of the car, the long skirt billowed in the wind and the soft, cool fabric felt like water against my shins. I think I walked around the building twice before anyone even noticed my presence. I was just admiring the floral decoration on the tables laid out on a grassy clearing when I heard a familiar squeak. 

“See? I was right! You look like a fucking fairy. Beautiful!” Lucy greeted me with outstretched arms. I couldn’t deny that even if I wanted to. So I just laughed. 

“I have to thank you, Lucienne. I haven’t felt this good in a very long time.” 

Smiling victoriously, she wrapped her arm around my shoulders, leading me towards the side entrance to greet those who were already there. “There’s only one downside to it,” she whispered in my ear playfully. “I’m afraid you’re gonna outshine the bride.”

“Lucienne!”

“What? I’m just being honest. Besides, it’s not really your fault. No one can blame you for having been born beautiful. Wine?” 

Before I could even respond, she was already handing me a glass filled almost to the brim with the fragrant golden liquid. Too bad we were both into guys. I think we would make a great couple, me and Lucy. “Isn’t it a bit too early for that?” I objected, pretending to be reasonable, even though I already desperately wanted to take a sip. 

“Never!” 

She excused herself after a while and I was once again left alone. I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast that day and even though I didn’t feel hungry, the wine soon reminded me, making me feel pleasantly – and perhaps dangerously – lightheaded even before the actual ceremony. 

I didn’t care. It was one of those days when time slows down and you simply let nature overwhelm your senses. The fragrant air, the cooling breeze, the pleasant sound of distant laughter… It was a perfect day… until it wasn’t. 

As the afternoon progressed, more people arrived and the whole garden was soon literally buzzing under the golden, late afternoon sun. I kept lurking in the vicinity, still disinterested in any form of socialization, when I suddenly spotted a very familiar curly head in the distance. 

He noticed me too, and immediately made a beeline for me before I could hide behind the surrounding trees. “Blue! My goodness, you look stunning.” He greeted me with his usual radiant smile, but his eyes betrayed him, as well as the tone of his voice. The apprehension I heard in it only added to my agitation that was already squeezing my chest like a tight corset. 

“Josh…” 

“What are you doing here?”

Wow. That was blunt. Even to his standard. My tipsy mind immediately switched to the affronted mode, and rightfully so, because what gave him the right to ask me such a question?! “What the fuck do you mean? I could ask you the same! I’m here with Lucy… you know, the groom’s sister.” I hissed. 

He sighed while rubbing his knuckles against his goatee. “Yeah… Well, the bride works for us, so…”

Us… 

“Is he here?” It was my turn to be blunt and I certainly had no intention to apologize for it. 

“Yes… um, listen, Blue… uh…”

I did not. I excused myself – perhaps too harshly – and basically ran away to find Lucy. The bitch…! 

I found the bitch in the main tent, deep in conversation with some other jerk I didn’t know, and that immediately made me even more angry. She had lured me here under the pretext of meeting new people, but here I was, abandoned and exposed and vulnerable. He was here, and most certainly not alone!

“You fucking traitor!” I spat, grabbing her harshly by the forearm and interrupting her friend in mid sentence. Lucy’s eyes widened in shock while the guy backed away with outstretched palms before he turned around and left us more or less alone. 

“What are you talking about, Blue?” Lucy’s tone was kind, but apprehensive.

“Jake! Why the fuck did you do this?” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking abou… oh…” she tried to grab me by the shoulders, but I dodged it and her eyes widened a second later when my back collided with someone else’s chest. Another pair of hands grabbed my arms instead to steady me. 

“What an interesting coincidence!”

I swear my heart stopped at the sound. So soothing when he had been whispering my nickname in the middle of the night, yet so harsh and venomous now. It pierced my ears and skin like thousands of ice crystals. 

“Could you excuse us?” The icy tone was now directed towards Lucy, who was still standing there in front of us, looking completely flabbergasted. It almost made me believe she really hadn’t known. Almost. With my lips pursed and my nostrils flared, I motioned to her to do as he said and she only nodded, before leaving us alone without another word. 

“Are you stalking me, Blue?” he whispered in my ear once we were alone, and one of his hands slid down to my hip. 

“No,” I hissed defiantly and my mind tried to wrench free from his grasp… but my body betrayed me and he chuckled at my feeble attempt. 

“I don’t believe you. Tell me the truth, baby, for whom did you dress so nicely today?” 

As much as I wanted to retort back, his touch left me speechless once again and all I could focus on were his fingers, traveling up my form until they cupped my breast, soft and heavy under the thin layers of viscose. 

And I let him do that. 

Why did I let him do that?

Because he made the rest of the world that surrounded us disappear again, that’s why. I could feel the tip of his nose rub against the sensitive skin of my neck.  “Mmmm, jasmine. My favorite. You really outdone yourself today, baby.”

My breath hitched when his parted lips touched the secret spot right under my earlobe. Not many people knew about it; he was one of the very few; and I moaned as soon as I felt the tip of his tongue dart forward, followed by a gust of his hot breath. “Too bad I have another cunt to entertain tonight.” 

And, just as suddenly as he had appeared behind me, he was gone. Three or four seconds passed until I finally dared to turn around, only to see him strut away in his dark blue shirt and tailored pants. A soft breeze cooled the spot that he kissed just a moment ago. 

It took me another moment to realize what he just said and against my own – or his – expectations, it filled me with energizing rage. 

Every atom in my body begged to run away from that place, but my conscious mind suddenly chose to rebel against my instincts and I ran into the nearest bathroom instead. I needed a mirror – to look that woman in the eye and tell her that he won’t hurt her again. Lucy had been right; she was beautiful. I was. I was more than he deserved. 

The ceremony was about to start, so I took a deep breath, got my shit together and went out to take my seat right next to Lucienne, walking past him… them with my head held high. 

Lucy immediately took my hand and without looking at me, she whispered: “I’m sorry, Blue. I honestly had no idea.”

“That’s ok.”

“Do you want me to call you an uber after this?”

“No,” I answered firmly. “I want him to taste his own medicine.”

@thewritingbeforesunrise @fleet-of-fiction @writingcold @lvnterninthenight @its-interesting-van-kleep  @takenbythemadness  @edgingthedarkness @myownparadise96 @gvfstuddedmajesty @jazzyfigz @sanguinebats @josh-iamyour-mama @lyndz2names @wetkleenex-gvf @peaceloveunitygvf @cheersdannyx2 @fleetingjake @lizzys-sunflower @emojakekiszka @gvfmarge @Dayumclarizzel @lipstickitty @clownstarr @gretasfallingsky @musicislove3389 @i-love-gvf @psychedelectable @allof--mylove @sacredsparrow @scarabsinthestardust @Ironlotus90 @stardustsam

[springwitch8]

hots for teacher (melissa schemmenti x fem!reader)

part 2

summary: you've been infatuated with melissa schemmenti ever since you worked under her as a student teacher. what will happen when you meet again a few years later?

warnings: NSFW content, implied future smut (part 2 on the way??), praise kink, age gap idk

notes: hi everyone! my name is april, and this is my first ever fanfiction. i wrote this for fun and then decided to share it with the community, because i love the little gay women in my phone! i've been reading fics on tumblr for as long as i've been on the internet, so this is a strange experience for me. anyway, enjoy, and let me know what you guys think!

tonight you looked sexy, and you knew it. you wore a sinfully short black dress with colorful butterflies. it was one of your favorites; it showed just the right amount and hugged just the right places to be tantalizing. your eyes were painted with thin black wings and soft, glittery eyeshadow that made you look like a sweet dream. your lips glistened and your hair was tied up in two dutch braids. you were a vision.

all this meant that you were not the least bit surprised when a deep, sultry female voice sounded from behind where you sat at the bar.

"it should be illegal to look like that in public."

you smiled coyly and turned around to face the stranger.

"why? see something you like?" when you turned to face her, however, you were met with a familiar face. it was a face you'd seen in your dreams time after time: your former boss, melissa schemmenti.

you had been assigned to work with melissa as a student teacher while you were in school for your teaching certification. at the time, she was teaching two grades simultaneously, so she was grateful to have you there to ease the burden. it didn't hurt that you were always so eager to please. you wanted to learn and become the best teacher you could be.

of course, your motives weren't entirely pure. you were attracted to melissa from the moment you saw her. you remembered it like it was yesterday: her flaming red hair was slightly messy from trying to wrangle her double class, and her glasses sat askew on her nose. then you came along and turned everything around. she would give you to-do lists, and you would finish them before lunchtime the same day.

"great job, hon! you're so good, don't know what i'd do without you..." she'd say each time, beaming with pride at her new prodigee.

"o-of course, ms. schemmenti. what else can i do for you?" you'd respond, blushing profusely at the praise and struggling to hold her intense gaze.

within a week of having you, melissa was caught up on all her work. she couldn't help but feel like you were an angel, or some kind of gift from god. whatever you were, she cherished you. as the two of you spent more time together, she started to want you more and more. every project, every conversation, every smile you two shared only added to your chemistry.

she had fun with it--teasing you with special pet names and praise, watching you get all flustered and squirmy. she knew you liked her back. you weren't the most subtle about your desire.

melissa would never act on her feelings, though. you were a doe-eyed twenty-something with big dreams, and she was your much older boss. getting involved with you would be too messy. but she always held out hope, even after you left abbott, that one day you'd meet again.

you studied melissa's sly smirk for a moment, in disbelief at your luck. it had been two years since you left abbott. you had your own big girl job now, and you were a bit more mature. there was nothing stopping you from acting on your desires.

"oh my god, ms. schemmenti! please, have a drink with me. it's been a while." you hoped you didn't sound too desperate, although you definitely looked desperate once you got a good glance at her.

her look was striking. your breath hitched in your throat as you scanned her form, dressed in red leather pants and a button-down shirt. her arms were visibly muscled, even through the jacket. the black button-down shirt she wore was unbuttoned just enough to tease her cleavage. around her waist was a thick black belt that you wanted to pull on. her fiery hair was tied back haphazardly in a high ponytail, just messy enough to be sexy. and her hands—god, her fingers were long and ringed and—

"whatever you say, kid," she shrugged and sat down next to you, giving you a playful smile. "and you can call me melissa now."

she had a mischievous glint in her eye, probably knowing how you felt just by the wanton way you stared at her. when she sat down beside you, you felt your whole body heat up. your thighs were almost touching from the proximity, and you could smell her intoxicating perfume with each inhale. feeling her body so close to yours had you more drunk than the alcohol. it didn't help that her eyes now roamed over your body shamelessly, taking in your glistening lips and lingering on your soft cleavage. you tried your best to play it cool.

you talked for a while, catching up on everything. you told her about your new job at a suburban elementary school, your volunteer tutoring on the weekends, your summers in the mountains. she beamed with pride hearing of your accomplishments.

"that's great, y/n! sounds like you're goin' places."

"thank you! i think i owe a lot of my success to my student teaching experience—everyone at abbott was great, including you. especially you," you looked at her with an intense gaze, feeling your desire catch up with you.

"you were such a passionate mentor. you just had this way of getting me excited..." you trailed off as you fixated on the stirrings of a smirk on her face.

"...excited about learning," you finished shakily.

"mm-hmm," she chuckled.

maybe it was the alcohol, or the simple fact that she was right next to you and seemingly devouring you with her eyes, but you became bolder then. you only had one shot at this.

"i mean, you really touched me in a way that nobody else could," you leaned in, dragging out your syllables for emphasis. "i worked so hard because i just needed to be good for you."

now she was the one shuddering. you had the upper hand, if only for a moment. but she quickly got her boldness back.

"i noticed that. always so bright and attentive. i bragged to all the other teachers about what a good girl you were." to top it all off, she punctuated her sentence by placing her hand firmly on your knee.

you thought you were going to explode right then and there. your skin erupted in goosebumps at her touch, and you spread your legs ever so slightly to indicate your consent. her face split into a smug grin and she began to crawl her fingers up your thigh, agonizingly slowly.

your response came as a shaky whisper. you were sure you must have soaked through your panties just from her teasing touches.

"it's good to know that you thought so highly of me. i looked up to you a lot," you said sheepishly. "um, i'm a bit embarrassed to admit it, but i did have a bit of a crush on you..."

"oh, yeah. that doesn't surprise me. don't be embarrassed, hon. you can't help what you feel," her hand had stalled at the midpoint of your thigh, and she looked at you with sincerity.

"it doesn't surprise you?" you asked, struggling to get the words out once she resumed stroking your thigh.

"i had my suspicions," she said with a knowing smirk. "i'm sharper than i look, ya know."

her darkened eyes sent shivers down your spine. you felt your core heat up at the humiliation of knowing she knew exactly what you thought about her.

"am i that obvious?" you asked, somewhat breathily.

"oh, sweetheart," she laughed. she leaned in close and you could smell her perfume, feel the warmth of her breath on your skin. her fingers pinched the skin of your thigh as she whispered to you. "you sat five feet away from me for months, always wearin' those little black skirts. you think i didn't see you rub your thighs together every time i gave you praise?"

her hand now caressed your inner thigh softly, teasingly. you failed to respond, trying to process her words but finding yourself unable to do anything but whimper almost silently.

"so soft here. mhmm," she husked into your ear. there was a hint of giddiness in her voice, as if she was pleased with herself for taking you apart so easily. "does that feel good, princess? do you like it when i touch you?"

"yes!" you said, almost too loudly for the public setting. "yes, i like it very much."

"good," she whispered as her fingers found the edge of your panties. your thighs spread even wider, and you let out a small gasp.

"we've got lots more to catch up on, don't we?" she continued, her fingers drawing feather-light circles over your clit through the fabric. you wondered if she could feel you throbbing for her. your hips bucked up to meet her hand, and she slapped your thigh in warning. "if you wanna keep talkin', we can head back to mine..."

you turned to her with big, glazed-over eyes. still whimpering, you nodded rapidly, earning a laugh from the older woman. she grabbed your hand and guided you out of the packed bar.

"i'm gonna wreck you, hon," she mumbled without looking back at you.

[newkatzkafe2023]

Idk if this have been answered but,,,, do You know Skylanders? What about the Wukongs meeting a PopFizz!Reader??

I'll be honest I never had to much of an interest in skylanders but PopFizz quickly became a favorite of mine😊

(Lmk Wukong) My god you are his dream girl, wild, crazy, and full of energy. Everyday was a fun mischief filled day causing trouble and running around filled with endurance and enjoy. Being married to you was filled with fun and things got even more intriguing when you introduced him to chemistry and Alchemy. However Wukong does show some concerns with you drinking your made potions, but you basically told him that it's basically you drinking soda and being on a sugar rush. You appreciate his concern for you though, as you always kiss his face.

(HIB Wukong) God he would lose centuries of his life when it came to you, especially with the children involved. You would chug your potions constantly and be on a constant move and it helps keep you on edge, and it is interesting when you teach the children some kid friendly Alchemy experiments. Wukong would sigh at your enthusiasm and never ending energy, but at least your super cute.

(NR Wukong) ohhh lord may you both never be left unsupervised together, because you both would do the most insane sh*t together. You both would drink booze and your fizzy potions and go do reckless but hilariously fun things together. You both would go wild at bars/nightclubs and drive recklessly at motorcycle race tracks, scaring the crap out of Li and Su. Over all you are Wukong's other half and he wouldn't change you for the world.

(MKR Wukong) He would look annoyed with your crazy antics and endlessly energy, but deep down he wouldn't change you for the world. Wukong always loved your enthusiasm especially when your joining him in battle, either drinking your potions or throwing them at enemies. You also seem to get a huge power up from your extra fizzy potions which make Wukong worry about you, but then again he would be even more worried if you weren't running around.

(Netflix Wukong) He adores you with everything he's got, your wildside had won his heart from the very beginning. You were always so enthusiastic about helping your husband with his plans, and even more so in battle. Wukong quickly sees how you put the mad in mad scientist whenever you do Alchemy, and enjoys watching the effects that different ones can do. Wukong always wonders what your gonna do next, but he's very excited.

(BMW Wukong) IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! For the great sage equal to heaven, especially when he saw a energetic monkey gal with a knack for getting into mischief. Wukong loves to get into trouble with you and likes to watch you preform your Alchemy experiments, and making your fizzy potions. Wukong always adored you more then anything in the 3 realms, and may you always remained his beloved crazy monkey queen.

(Destined one) The Destined one would sigh alot, but smile at your antics and he loves you the way you are. It's actually a bit entertaining because your a little bit crazy especially when you lost your temper, when people mess with your husband. Your potions often boost your energy and powers and making some for the Destined one too, wanting to help him in battle against the celestials realm. Having you around The Destined one would never be bored ever again🥰

(Lotmk Wukong) Oh man, you would honestly stress him out, not just him but the pilgrims in general. I mean, Wukong wouldn't in a million years plan to change you, but it's just that you seem to have so much energy, especially drinking your potions. He would run after you constantly whenever you're in your suger rush phase, and he would always make sure you don't hurt yourself. At the end of the day, Wukong will always love you, despite barely being able to keep up with you.

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG🥤

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 86 (Family Drama)

The next evening, before Heather and Conrad left for their date, her youngest sister, Hazel, arrived in Brindleton Bay to watch her niece and nephew.

Ash excitedly called to her from the computer as soon as she walked in the door. "Aunt Hazel, Aunt Hazel, come check out my new game!"

"Thanks for driving out here so Conrad and I can have a night out," Heather said. "The security cameras are working and Conrad's getting the kids fed before we go, so just get them to bed at a decent hour and no horror movies."

"It's just food colouring," she protested, but with Heather's stern glance she nodded obediently. "Sorry, Ashy. No Moonlight Massacre tonight, after all."

Heather changed the subject before Ash could complain. "I'm sad you won't be in town when we're in Henford this weekend to meet River and Cass' new baby boy. Dad says you don't call home enough."

Hazel laughed. "Dad tells me you don't call enough! None of us could ever call home enough. River still lives there and Dad probably thinks he doesn't get to see enough of him, either."

"Missing out on Dad guilt tripping us to visit for a political conference in San Myshuno's pretty cool, though. Ash, that's enough game time. Conrad's almost finished making your dinner."

Ash moaned, but he turned off the computer and headed for the kitchen as Hazel picked up her niece for a cuddle in her unicorn onesie. "I'm kind of glad to be out of Henford for the night to get in time with Ashy and Lava. Has that weird old dude been a problem lately?"

Heather made sure Ash was out of earshot. "Not since the restraining order," she said, the relief on her face more than evident. "And you're stuck on those nicknames, huh? I thought nicknames were too corny for you."

"It's not my fault your kids are just as cool as volcanoes, big sis."

Heather grinned. Hazel, the baby of their family, could get away with anything and dripped charm to spare, but Heather could tell something was weighing on her mind. "Are you doing okay?"

Hazel took a deep breath, setting Lavender down before she moved to the sofa. "What made you realize you wanted to be single when we were in high school?"

Heather laughed. "It was just easier than having feelings. It's still easier than having feelings, but finding the right person is better. What's wrong?"

She frowned. "What if Nicola and I got married too young? We're different people than we were as teens. When her dad died of a heart attack a few months ago, it felt like I wasn't married to the same person anymore. I know she's grieving, but what if we didn't wait long enough into young adulthood to figure it all out?"

Heather could empathize with her sister's confusion over love and relationships. Not too long ago, Heather would have found it unthinkable to offer her siblings, of all people, relationship advice, but Conrad had shown her what great love could be.

"You know I've never been very flirty or romantic, and I held on to my relationship with Malcolm too long because I didn't think I deserved any better. I'd never recommend it, but I also know Nicola's not Malcolm Landgraab. If you trust her, you can tell her the truth."

Hazel nodded. "No, she's definitely not like Malcolm."

"If you're truly unhappy, don't force it because you think you're supposed to. But if you're asking me, I think it means there's still some fight in you to keep it together."

(Lovestruck's new relationship and chemistry features went after Hazel and her new wife, and I'm rolling with it to see what happens. I cheated their relationship back up a bit - as if what Heather said encouraged her to fight a little more - and we'll see how it goes with them.

The way I said that probably gave away what might happen but pfft you don't know!)

Grateful for her eldest sister's advice, Hazel turned her attention back to Lavender, while Heather joined Ash and Conrad in the kitchen.

"Tomorrow night we'll pack some things into your backpack for your weekend at your dad's," Heather said to her son. "He'll pick you up after school on Friday and take you to his place for the weekend."

"He'll probably send their driver like usual," he shrugged. "But Ray's cool."

"What do you mean, 'like usual?'"

Ash looked at her with confusion etched on his face. "Daddy's reporting til seven on the news every weeknight, Mommy!"

Heather stared at Conrad, wide-eyed. "He told me he does those hits pre-recorded."

"He always sends Ray, and Ray always takes me to get ice cream before we get to Daddy's penthouse. Why do you look pretend happy, Mommy? I love ice cream!"

"Your mom just hasn't met Ray, buddy."

"But Mommy, he's not a stranger. He's Ray!"

Heather plastered a smile, and Conrad reached under the table to caress her clenched fist. "I'll be at school on Friday afternoon when Ray's there to pick you up at three," she said. "If he's as nice as you say, I don't want him to be a stranger to me."

Ash smiled. "Okay, Mommy, that's a good a idea."

Heather felt constantly undermined by the Landgraabs. But there was little she could say without disappointing her son, and she didn't want bitterness to affect her night with Conrad. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 1 Summary | Gen 1 Start

NOTE: Their date continues Monday but tomorrow there will be a bonus post inspired by @purplesimmer455! 👀

NOTE 2: Also noting, since this is an episode where nothing much seems to be happening, there are a few subtle hints in here, too, about how Conrad is on a pedestal, especially when Heather compares him to Malcolm, even though we all know he's keeping this massive secret from her, too.

[delusionalwriter02]

OMGGG I LOVE YOUR IG POSTS, IF YOUR NOT TOO BUSY CAN YOU DO A FYODOR ONE PLEASE!!!

Insta as Fyodor's GF

a/n : hello dear!! thank you so much for your request, hope you like it!<3

<3 liked by Fyofyo, Sig_ma and 138 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : when he's being cute

Fyofyo : This flower was even more magnificent in your hair

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : I love you angel

Golgot : And in mineeeee ????

↳ Fyofyo : Stay back clown

↳ Golgot : I AIN'T A CLOWN you polar stupid bear

↳ Fyofyo : Wouah that was SO lame

↳ Golgot : I CAN'T FIND A BETTER INSULT

↳ Fyofyo : Well, I can think of multiple ones

↳ Golgot : I want you dead SO BAD

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : stop it RIGHT NOW, you're not going to kill him and Fyo you stop insulting him

↳ Fyofyo : You're not fun, angel

Sig_ma : What type of flower is that ?

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : a poppy! when you take them, they die a few hours later

↳ Sig_ma : isn't it romantic

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : i know

<3 liked by Fyofyo, Golgot and 374 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : he's a prince

Golgot : and a great musician

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : what can't he do

↳ Golgot : love me

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : tf ??

Sig_ma : that bass is HUGE

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : like his-

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : Fyodor's here, she ain't finishing that sentence

↳ Sig_ma : hmmm hi Fyodor I guess ?

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : She ain't responding for a few hours so stop commenting

↳ Golgot : what's happening ???????????????????????????

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : I'll finish her sentence, bye

↳ Sig_ma : that was so random

<3 liked by Daze_i, Sig_ma and 382 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : hello the world, i'm back

Sig_ma : Are you alright

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : yes of course, why ?

↳ Sig_ma : Well you left, abruptly

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : oh

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : that

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : well yeah i'm ok

↳ Sig_ma : .... good to hear

↳ Golgot : to read*

↳ Sig_ma : go away

Daze_i : I want a date at the beach too

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : Go with Chuuya, Kunikida or whoever you want

↳ Daze_i : but none of them will say yes

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : yk what ? you got chemistry with way too many people, that's your problem

↳ Daze_i : for the first time ever, i'll leave and it's MY decision

↳ Fyofyo : yeah leave, far away, very far away

<3 liked by Fyofyo, Sig_ma and 248 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : love is the greatest feeling ever

Fyofyo : I love you angel, I like that photo

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : I love you too honey and yes me too, it's calming

↳ Fyofyo : I agree, night is the part of the day

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : exactly! we should go out at night more often

↳ Golgot : am i bothering you ?

↳ Fyofyo : Yes

↳ Golgot : just talk privately omg

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : just don't look at the comments

↳ Golgot : It's a SOCIAL media, I have the right to look

↳ Fyofyo : So stop complaining

↳ Golgot : I'm out

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : finally

Hello! I hope you liked it ? Thank you so much for your kind words and your request!

See you <3

[kyleoreillylover]

Attention

Summary: Sami figures out why you and Jey hate him, and gives you a different kind of attention you both have been craving.

warnings: smut, male, female receiving, top!sami, bottom reader, bottom jey.

pairings: Sami Zayn x fem!Black!Reader x Jey Uso

word count: 6,306

timeline: before war-games 2022

tagged: @southerngirl41@venusesworld@jeysbae@reci1996@tbones450 @steakwithasideofmashngravy @hope4more @selena-tyler-564@saintaquarius@whatdoeseverybodywant@raya-hunter01

a/n: I am sorry for this, just want to say that in advance. Samijey is 😩 Hope ya'll enjoy!

Sami were sure that you and Jey had never hated anyone in your life more than you hated him.

Which is why he knew it was gonna be hard when Roman told him you and Jey were his responsibility, and as the Honorary Uce, needed to watch over you guys.

Sami tried, god did he try. But he just didn't know why you and Jey hated him. Jey would constantly undermine him, get into arguments with him, and the tension between them could always end in a fight.

You, on the other hand, didn't share that same anger. You just simply ignored him. If Sami asked you to do something, such as not attack other women, you would go and do the complete opposite. You didn't get angry with him, but somehow the silence was even more infuriating to Sami. It was like you didn't care about anything he said or did.

Which made Sami confused when Roman handed him a bag and keycard that opened the door to a luxurious suite in the finest hotel in town.

Sami blushed when he opened the bag and quickly closed it, gaping at Roman with a a mix of surprise and confusion. "What's all this for?" Sami stammered, glancing between the bag and Roman.

Roman smirked, crossing his arms. "For you, Jey and Y/N," he replied.

Sami couldn't help but feel skeptical, given the history of animosity. "But they hate me?"

Roman laughed at Sami's comment. "They don't hate you. They like you a little too much, and that's why they are acting like this. They don't want to seem weak, so they put up a tough exterior."

Roman's words puzzled Sami. He couldn't comprehend how being liked could translate into such hostility. Still, the prospect of a luxurious suite and Roman's assurance intrigued him. And Sami liked the both of you and wanted to make things better.

Sami raised an eyebrow, still unsure. "So, why the hotel suite?"

Roman grinned, enjoying Sami's confusion. "To get rid of all the sexual tension between the three of you."

Sami's eyes widened as he processed Roman's words. He stammered, "Wait, what? Sexual tension?"

Roman chuckled, clearly finding amusement in Sami's reaction. "Look, I can see it, and so can everyone else. You and Jey are practically at each other's throats, and Y/N is being quiet because she finds you intriguing, and doesn't wanna embarrass herself. The sexual tension is so thick you could cut it with a knife. So, I thought a little getaway might help relieve some of that tension and bring you three closer together."

Sami's face turned several shades of red as he processed Roman's words. "You're suggesting a getaway to… what, exactly?" Sami couldn't deny the chemistry between him, you and Jey, but he never thought it was perceived as sexual tension. The idea of a hotel suite to resolve such matters left him bewildered.

Roman smirked knowingly. "Just relax, Sami. Have a great night, and when I see the three of you tomorrow I want there to be no more hostility. And that's an order, Sami."

With that, Roman beckoned Sami out of his office, and Sami stood there, still trying to wrap his head around Roman's unexpected directive. As he walked out of Roman's office, he clutched the bag and keycard in his hands, contemplating the surreal situation he found himself in.

He made his way to the luxurious suite, wondering how exactly this getaway was supposed to dissolve the tension between him, Jey, and you. Sami hesitated before using the keycard to open the door, half-expecting a prank or some kind of setup.

Upon entering, Sami was taken aback by the opulence of the suite. The room was adorned with lavish furnishings, and the atmosphere screamed extravagance. He couldn't help but think, "How is this going to solve anything?"

As Sami explored the suite, he noticed three separate bedrooms, each with its own ensuite bathroom. He saw you and Jey talking in one of the bedrooms, the tension palpable even from a distance. Sami hesitated, unsure of how to approach the situation.

You and Jey glanced at Sami as he entered the room, the air thick with awkwardness. You stopped talking and cleared your throat, while Jey glared at Sami, standing up and crossing his arms. "What are you doing here? Roman's supposed to room with us." Jey grumbled.

Sami, still processing the unexpected turn of events, stammered, "Uh, Roman said this suite is for all three of us. He's rooming with Solo and Jimmy, so uh, sorry about that."

Sami was trying to finds signs that the two of you liked him more than you let on. He set the bag down before addressing the tension between them.

"Look, I know things have been rocky between us, but Roman said we need to get along, so we might as well make the best of this situation." Sami didn't mention the sexual tension part, but acknowledged the need to address the tension.

Jey scofffed and folded his arms, clearly not thrilled with the idea. "I ain't one for playing nice, but if Roman wants it, fine. Just stay out of my way."

With that, Jey glared at Sami one last time before going to the bathroom, leaving you and Sami in awkward silence.

Sami turned to you, his expression a mix of uncertainty and curiosity. "And you?" he asked, trying to gauge your reaction.

You met Sami's gaze, a subtle smirk playing on your lips. "I don't mind playing nice," you replied, your tone suggesting a hint of mischief. "But you'll have to keep up, Sami."

Sami couldn't help but chuckle nervously at your response. "I'll do my best," he said, a bit more at ease knowing that at least one of you seemed open to the idea.

You quickly went back to being silent though. It wasn't your fault, it was Sami's fault because of that damn shirt he was wearing. The shirt was tight, accentuating his muscles, and you found it distracting. Sami noticed your sudden silence and couldn't help but feel a mix of confusion and self-consciousness.

Sami cleared his throat, attempting to break the awkward silence. "So, um, what do you guys want to do? I mean, Roman did get us this fancy suite, might as well enjoy it, right?"

You shrugged nonchalantly, your eyes nervously still fixed on Sami. If you didn't leave in the next 5 seconds, you were gonna jump his bones. "You know what, Jey was right. Just stay out of my way." You got up to go to the bathroom, leaving Sami standing there, bewildered by your abrupt dismissal.

Was that a blush on your face as you walked away? Sami couldn't help but feel a mix of confusion and intrigue. He glanced over at Jey, who was emerging from the bathroom with a scowl on his face.

"Great, now you've scared her off," Jey muttered, shooting a glare at Sami.

Sami, still trying to process the situation, defended himself. "I didn't do anything! She just… left."

Jey rolled his eyes. "Sure, whatever. Just stay out of my way, and we won't have any problems."

As the tension lingered in the air, Sami realized that Roman's plan might be more challenging to execute than he initially thought. The luxurious surroundings did little to ease the palpable discomfort between the three of them.

Sami decided to take a moment to gather his thoughts. He needed to prove his theory that you both liked him, so he changed into a more revealing shirt, and shorts, hoping to gauge your reactions.

When he came out of the bathroom, he didn't miss the way Jey's eyes widened slightly, and your gaze lingered for a moment before you averted your eyes. Sami couldn't help but smirk, feeling a small sense of victory.

Jey raised an eyebrow, trying to appear unimpressed. "Why the hell you wearing shorts in a hotel suite?" Jey grumbled.

Sami shrugged casually. "Just trying to be comfortable, Uce. Roman did say we're here to relax and get along, right?"

Jey scoffed, trying not to let his eyes linger to Sami's ass. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just don't make this any weirder than it already is."

You licked your lips nervously, your eyes flickering between Sami and Jey. The tension in the room seemed to shift, taking on a different, more charged quality. Sami, feeling a bit emboldened by the reactions he was getting, decided to take a playful approach.

"Well, since we're supposed to get along and all," Sami grinned, "how about we make the most of this fancy suite? Maybe order some room service, watch a movie, or, you know, just enjoy the amenities."

Jey sighed, clearly not thrilled with the idea but willing to go along with Roman's directive. "Fine, whatever. But I'm not sharing my food."

"Not even with me?" You pouted playfully, and Jey's eyes softened at your playful expression. Sami couldn't help but feel a sense of relief as it seemed like the atmosphere was starting to lighten up, even if just a little.

"Only with you though. Not this fucking fool." And there goes the sexual tension, Sami thought to himself. He chuckled, realizing that Roman might have been onto something after all.

"I'll grab the food." Jey announced, standing up and heading towards the door to get room service. If he spent another second in the room with Sami and you, he was afraid things might escalate in a way he didn't want them to. And he hated himself for that.

As Jey left, Sami turned to you with a frown. "Why does he act like that? I mean, it's like he's on edge all the time."

You shrugged, nervously watching the door as Jey left. "Jey's always been a bit intense. Takes time to warm up to people, I guess." Sami noticed your leg bouncing restlessly, a sign of unease. Without thinking, he placed his hand on your leg, attempting to offer some comfort. You looked at his hand on your leg, the heat and intensity in your gaze catching Sami off guard.

"I think I'm gonna help Jey get some food." You tried to run away for the second time, but this time Sami was quick to catch your arm gently.

"Wait, Y/N! Can you please stop running away from me when I feel like we make progress?" You paused, looking at Sami with a mix of surprise and vulnerability. Sami could see the internal struggle in your eyes.

"I'm not running away," you insisted, your tone defensive. "I just don't like you."

Sami scoffed, releasing your arm but maintaining eye contact. "Oh really? Then why the nervous glances and the pouting earlier? And don't think I didn't notice the way you looked at me just now."

"Don't flatter yourself Sami. How was I even looking at you just now?" you retorted, crossing your arms and trying to regain composure.

Sami leaned in, a serious expression on his face."Like you wanted me to do something you wouldn't admit out loud."

Your cheeks flushed, and took a step back, a mix of defiance and uncertainty in your eyes. "I hate you, and that's never going to change."

Sami couldn't help but smirk, seeing through your attempt at defiance. "That's not what Roman said." Sami moved closer, the tension between you two palpable. "And I'm starting to believe him."

You pulled away abruptly, the intensity of the moment catching you off guard. "Whatever Roman said doesn't matter. I don't care what he thinks," you muttered, avoiding Sami's gaze.

Sami chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "God, you and Jey are so fucking stubborn."

You bristled at his comment. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Sami grinned, his playful demeanor returning. "It means you both run away whenever you feel like you are not in control."

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms defiantly. "I do not run away!"

"You were just about to when I stopped you," Sami pointed out, his tone teasing.

"No, I was gonna help Jey with the food," you retorted, sticking to your defense.

Sami raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. "Sure, sure. Because running to Jey is definitely not a way to avoid dealing with this." He paused, studying your reaction.

"Shut your mouth!" You grabbed Sami by the collar and stared at him, a mixture of frustration and something else in your eyes. Sami couldn't help but notice the sudden change in the atmosphere, the fiery intensity replacing the previous tension.

Sami, now closer to you, felt the heat radiating between you two. The air was charged with a different kind of energy, a magnetic pull that neither of you could deny. He could sense the internal struggle within you, the conflict between the proclaimed hatred and the underlying tension. "Shut your mouth."

Sami licked his lips, his gaze locked with yours. "Stop running away from this."

You breathed heavily, your grip on Sami's collar tightening. "Stop saying that!" You tightened your grip on his collar, your eyes narrowing in frustration. Sami, sensing the intensity of the moment, couldn't help but feel a surge of adrenaline.

In that charged silence, Sami decided to take a risk and push you a bit more. "Why? That's what you do. You run away from things that make you uncomfortable."

"Shut. Your Mouth." You paused, your lips dangerously close to Sami's. The room felt like it was closing in, the air thick with a tension that neither of you could escape.

"It's in your blood. Running from things that you hate."

"Stop..." you whispered, your tone low and filled with a mix of anger and something Sami couldn't quite place.

Sami could feel a breakthrough coming, and knew he couldn't stop pushing until he got some answers. "Why? You hate me, so why should what I say matter to you?"

"Because I'm fucking attracted to you, okay-" You stopped breathing when you realized what you admitted. Sami's eyes widened, registering the shock and vulnerability in your confession. The room seemed to freeze for a moment as the weight of your words hung in the air.

You let go of Sami's collar, taking a step back, your face flushed with embarrassment. Sami, still processing your confession, couldn't believe what he just heard.

"You… what?" Sami stammered, a mix of surprise and realization crossing his face.

"I said it. Are you happy now?" You snapped, your previous defiance replaced with a sense of vulnerability.

Sami, still in shock, managed to mumble, "I… I didn't expect that."

"Well, now you know. So, can we drop it and go back to pretending we hate each other?" You tried to regain control of the situation, avoiding eye contact with Sami.

Sami, however, couldn't ignore the bombshell you just dropped. "No, wait. Y/N, are you serious?"

You sighed, frustration evident in your expression. "Yes, Sami. I hate that I'm attracted to you, but there, I said it. Happy now?"

Yes, Sami was actually happy. Very happy. And he wasn't gonna let you run away from him this time. He saw the signs of you about to succumb to the tension, and he wasn't about to let it slip away.

Sami took a step closer to you, his eyes now filled with a newfound confidence. "Then do something about it."

You looked at Sami with a mixture of surprise and defiance. Your confidence was shaky at Sami's bluntness. Now it was you who was stuttering. "I-I'm sorry… What?"

Sami smirked at your stunned expression. "You heard me. If you're attracted to me, stop running away and do something about it."

He was giving you control of the situation, challenging you to act on your admission. The room seemed to pulsate with the unresolved tension between you and Sami. You hesitated, your mind racing, but something in Sami's gaze urged you to confront the feelings you had been suppressing.

As you gathered your thoughts, Sami took another step closer, closing the distance between you two. His eyes bore into yours with a mixture of intensity and anticipation. "I won't let you run away this time, Y/N."

You took a deep breath, trying to gather the courage to face what was happening. "I can't believe I'm doing this," you muttered under your breath, more to yourself than to Sami.

Sami chuckled, a hint of triumph in his expression. "Hey, you said it yourself. You're attracted to me. No shame in admitting it."

Rolling your eyes, you decided to seize the moment. You closed the gap between you and Sami, surprising him as you pressed your lips against his. The kiss was a mixture of pent-up tension, frustration, and an unexpected surge of desire.

Sami, taken aback by your bold move, quickly reciprocated. The room seemed to fade away as you both surrendered to the magnetic pull between you. The initial fiery intensity softened into something more passionate, and for a moment, the history of animosity vanished.

You groaned in pleasure as your fantasies came true as Sami reciprocated the kiss, his hands finding their way to your waist.

The tension that had built up between you two finally found its release in that electrifying moment. The kiss became an exploration of shared desire, and it seemed like all the animosity that existed between you and Sami was being used in a much more pleasurable way.

"What the hell going on?" Jey's voice made Sami break the kiss in a panic, not knowing how he was going to react. You, on the other hand, gave Jey a knowing look and pulled Sami into a heated embrace. Sami, still catching his breath, looked at Jey with a mix of surprise and defiance.

Jey stood there, his eyes narrowing as he processed the unexpected scene before him. "What the hell, Y/N?" he exclaimed, clearly caught off guard. His lower half heated up at the sight of the two of you entwined in a passionate kiss. Sami, still holding you close, tried to gauge Jey's reaction, unsure of what would come next.

You broke the kiss, your gaze shifting between Sami and Jey. "Well, Roman did say to get along, right?" you quipped, a mischievous glint in your eyes.

Jey was trying not to blow his load right then and there. So he switched back to anger, crossing his arms and scowling. "Y/N…"

But you could see right through him. "Jey, it's fine. It's okay. Sami understands." You gave Sami a reassuring smile, silently communicating that you were in control of the situation. "Come sit on the bed with us."

Jey's scowl deepened, his eyes flickering between you and Sami. "Y/N, I aint think I should-"

"Sit on the bed, Jey." Your voice turned commanding, leaving no room for argument. Jey, despite his initial resistance, found himself complying and reluctantly took a seat on the bed, eyeing the two of you with a mixture of confusion and frustration.

Sami thought Jey's scowl meant he was about to witness a whole new level of animosity, but to his surprise, Jey's expression shifted from anger to something more complex.

Sami, still holding onto you, exchanged a glance with Jey. The tension in the room was undeniable, but it wasn't the hostile kind they were used to. Instead, it was a charged atmosphere filled with unspoken desires and unexpected connections.

You sat between Sami and Jey, looking at both of them with a mixture of determination and curiosity. Sami, feeling a bit nervous about what might unfold next, glanced at Jey, who was still processing the situation.

"Okay, let's talk about this," you said, breaking the charged silence. "Jey, he knows."

Jey glared at your words. "Knows what?"

You rolled your eyes, frustration evident in your tone. "That I like him. And I think he should know that you like him too."

Jey scoffed, looking away. "What are you talking about? I don't like him."

You shot him a skeptical look. "Jey, no one is gonna judge you-"

"I don't like him!" Jey shot a defensive response, but the intensity in his eyes told a different story. "I hate him! His stupid eyes, weird hair, annoying voice…"

Sami couldn't help but smirk at Jey's vehement denial. "Wow, Uce, really selling it there."

Jey shot Sami a warning glare. "Shut up, Sami. I ain't into you."

You crossed your arms, unconvinced. "Jey, you don't have to pretend. It's okay to have feelings, you know?"

Jey grumbled, avoiding eye contact. "Feelings? I don't have feelings for him-" He was cut off by your lips on his, effectively silencing his protests. The room fell into a charged silence once again as you kissed Jey passionately, catching him off guard.

Sami watched the unexpected turn of events with a mix of amusement and surprise. Jey, after a moment of resistance, found himself responding to the kiss. The tension in the room took on a different, more intimate quality.

As you pulled away, Jey looked at you with a mix of confusion and realization. "What the hell, Y/N?"

You smirked, your eyes flickering between Sami and Jey. "I like you too Jey, and I know you like me too. And you also like Sami. So can you stop being stubborn for one fucking second and just admit it?"

Jey sat there, still processing the whirlwind of emotions and the unexpected turn of events. Sami couldn't help but feel a mix of amusement and satisfaction at the unfolding drama.

"Y/N, this ain't right," Jey finally muttered, his voice filled with a mix of confusion and frustration.

You sighed, about to respond, but surprisingly Sami interrupted, his eyes reassuring and his voice filled with an unexpected understanding. "Jey, it's okay. We're all adults here. If you like me, that's nothing to be ashamed of. And if you don't, that's fine too. But pretending won't help any of us."

Jey glared at Sami, still processing the situation. "This is messed up. We're not supposed to… I don't know, do this."

You rolled your eyes, a hint of impatience in your tone. "Jey, we're all consenting adults. Roman gave us this suite to resolve the tension, and this seems like a pretty effective way to do it. Stop being ashamed of your feelings, we aren't going to let anyone judge us for it."

Jey scowled, clearly torn between his usual tough exterior and the complex emotions surfacing. He trusted you, and deep down he trusted Sami, but he didn't trust his own emotions to guide him through this uncharted territory.

It felt like hours as you and Sami waited for a response, and you honestly thought he would leave and try to distance himself from the situation.

However, to your surprise, Jey took a deep breath, grabbed Sami by the collar, and pulled him into a fierce kiss. Sami squeaked in surprise as Jey kissed him so hard he almost stumbled backward, Jey's previous denial melting away in that passionate moment.

Jey licked at Sami's lips, his hands gripping Sami's shirt tightly. The room seemed to crackle with the intensity of the unexpected embrace, and you watched with a mix of amusement and satisfaction.

As the kiss deepened, Jey pulled away, his eyes locking with Sami's. There was a raw, unspoken understanding between them, a connection that went beyond words. Sami, still a bit stunned, looked at Jey with a newfound sense of realization.

"I hate you," Jey muttered, a teasing glint in his eyes.

Sami chuckled, his usual playful demeanor returning. "Kiss me again."

Jey obliged, and the fire crackling in him erupted as Sami responded with equal intensity. The room became a battleground of desires, each kiss fueled by the complex emotions that had been hidden for far too long. As their lips met, it was as if the animosity and tension between them had transformed into a fiery passion that couldn't be contained.

Jey groaned as your lips met the soft skin on his neck, letting you leave a trail of kisses. The atmosphere in the room had shifted dramatically, and the initial tension had evolved into something more intoxicating. Sami, caught in the whirlwind of desire, couldn't help but reciprocate with fervor.

It was clear that control was not something you and Jey gave up easily. He could tell by the way you tried to push Jey onto the bed while Sami continued to kiss him. Jey, however, wasn't one to be easily dominated. He broke the kiss, giving Sami a defiant look.

"Y/N, I think we need to establish some ground rules here," Jey said, his voice low and commanding.

You smirked, enjoying the playful power struggle. "Oh? And what rules are you thinking of, Jey?"

Jey glanced at Sami before turning his attention back to you. "I'm in charge here."

You nipped at Jey's earlobe, teasingly challenging his declaration. "That's cute."

Jey tried to glare at you, but there was no heat behind it. He paused, his eyes flickering between you and Sami. "Get on the bed, and take off your clothes."

You giggled, a mischievous glint in your eyes. "Make me." You kissed him hungrily, the two of you getting lost in each others lips, not noticing Sami grabbing the bag and taking something out of it.

Before any of you could respond, you were both flipped onto the bed by Sami, and in the flash of an eye, handcuffed you both to the bedposts. The sudden turn of events left both you and Jey wide-eyed and surprised.

"What the hell, Sami?" Jey exclaimed, trying to tug at the handcuffs.

Sami chuckled, a sly grin on his face. "You guys have been getting on my nerves for the past couple of months, and you really think either one of you could be in charge? Not a chance in hell."

You and Jey exchanged surprised glances, realizing that Sami had just turned the tables on both of you. Jey, still trying to process the sudden change, muttered, "This ain't what I signed up for."

Sami laughed, his confidence evident. "Well, now you're stuck with me." He glanced at both of you, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. "And I think it's about time we all stop running away from what we really want."

Heat spread through your body as Sami set his hands on your hips, his gaze lingering on both you and Jey. His gaze made Jey's skin tingle, and he couldn't deny the unexpected excitement that coursed through him.

Sami leaned in, placing a teasing kiss on your lips, then moving to Jey. Jey, despite his initial protests, seemed intrigued by the sudden turn of events, and moaned into Sami's lips when his hand grazed his hard on, and you let out a similar moan when Sami's other hand gently traced a path on your inner thigh.

"You think you can handle both of us, Sami?" Jey challenged as he groaned out, a smirk playing on his lips.

Sami grinned, a newfound confidence in his demeanor. "Trust me, I'm more than up for the challenge."

___________________

Sami never thought he would be in the same room as you and Jey without an argument, let alone getting along.

But right now, you guys were more than getting alone, your weight on his face intoxicating as you sat on it while Jey rode Sami's cock like his life depended on it.

The only sounds in the room were the moans Sami forced out of you both that you tried and failed to hide, and Sami's grunts as he tasted your sweetness and Jey milked his cock.

"You're so fucking annoying Sami, but goddamn you fuck so good-oh, god, right there, right there!"

Sami thrusted upwards to stop Jey's complaining and smirked as he made him choke on a moan, giving into Jey's commands and thrusting into that same spot over and over.

Sami let out a moan himself as you grinded on his face, tugging at his hair and letting out unintelligible moans as Sami's tongue worked wonders on your clit, sucking and licking in ways that had you shaking in pleasure. 

"Not so quiet now, huh?" Sami teased you as he slid his fingers into the mix and you let out your loudest moan of the night, not even able to speak coherently. You nodded your head and tugging at Sami's hair like it was the only thing keeping you sane.

"That's what I thought, baby." Sami's voice had a cocky hint to it, and it made you melt into him even more.

Jey clenched his walls against Sami's cock, biting his lip so hard to try and suppress his moans from escaping as he tried to reach his high. Sami's other hand snaked down to grip Jey's member roughly, and Jey gasped at the feeling, his hips bucking upwards into hand.

"Right there Sami! Fuckkkk, right there! Right there, right there!!"

Sami chuckled and began pumping furiously, his fingers so fast and so strong it was difficult to breathe. How did Sami know exactly where to touch and when to stroke to make Jey lose his mind? How did he know exactly how to make you both lose your minds together without breaking either one of you apart?

You couldn't even remember how long this whole scene had been going on for; your senses were overwhelmed and you'd barely noticed anything else. 

Sami increased his pace when he noticed you both nearing your highs, your voice finally coming back when Sami sucked on your swollen clit so hard and his fingers  pumped faster than ever before.

"Sami, fuck, keep doing that please, oh fuck, oh God, yes!" You yelled out, your voice hoarse and legs trembling uncontrollably as you felt your orgasm approaching.

You whined when Sami slowed down at your words, his arms going down to still Jey's movements. Your head fell back to the mattress, your breath ragged and heavy as Jey panted loudly, his head thrown back and sweat coating his body as he continued to try and ride Sami's dick.

"Sami..." Jey groaned in protest as Sami's hands stopped him from riding Sami's cock, his own breathing heavily as his release built slowly, but steadily.

"Admit that you don't hate me." Sami's deep voice vibrated inside you, sending chills through your entire body. He pulled his lips away from your pussy, his dark brown eyes staring straight into both your souls.

Jey tried to say something, but couldn't come up with anything, unable to formulate a reply to Sami's words. His throat tightened as he stared at Sami, unable to break free of his hypnotic stare. 

 You closed your eyes tightly, trying to grind yourself on Sami's face, trying to get back to the high, but Sami  was having none of it. He stopped your movement, his thumb caressing you lovingly in his hand, making you whimper and open your eyes.

He leaned in, his face inches away from yours as he whispered, "Say it."

"Fuck man..I don't hate you." Jey finally managed to get out as the desperation for release hit him, his heart pounding painfully against his rib cage as Sami 's intense stare bore into his eyes.

"Y/N?" At this point you thought Sami enjoyed toying with you both, as all you could think of was him eating you out and sucking on your clit like you both had been starving. A shiver went down your spine at the thought of Sami doing that with Jey.

"Yes Sami?" You answered breathlessly as your face heated.

"Tell me you don't hate me." Sami replied softly. It was almost impossible to hear him speak.

Your face flushed crimson, yet a smile crossed your lips. This game was becoming too much. You licked your lips nervously and looked at him, trying to ignore the way his intense gaze affected you, and you answered quietly. "No... I don't hate you."

Sami smiled wickedly at you, his gaze softening. He finally got you both to release your stubborn defenses and open up to him (in more than one way.) "Good." 

Then he continued his ministrations, and both you and Jey moaned in unison as you both quickly went back to chasing your highs once again. Sami felt his own orgasm approaching with every moan you let out and Jey's cock milking his own, but pushed it away to  concentrate on the two of you.

He kept on stroking and letting Jey thrust into him, making sure each and every moan you released came out of you both like a symphony, the sounds echoing against the wall like a thousand music notes that all blended and intertwined and created a beautiful harmony.

"Oh god," Jey breathed out, his eyes shut in ecstasy as Sami kept hitting his prostate relentlessly, sending waves of pleasure surging through him.

You couldn't help the cries of pleasure that escaped you as well, your whole body quivering as your orgasm approached. Both of you had reached the peak of your arousal and were struggling for another breath.

"I'm so fucking close Sami, don't you dare fucking stop." Jey's voice was hoarse with arousal as he begged Sami to keep going. "I won't, I promise." Sami assured him softly.

Sami smiled at how desperate Jey sounded and he sped up, wanting you both to be satisfied, but the moment his fingers brushed against your clit again, you shot upwards with such force he was certain you would crack your neck if him and Jey weren't holding onto your legs, his name falling from your lips like a prayer of pure bliss.

"Sami, right there, right there-Samiiii!!" You chanted as your walls convulsed around Sami's fingers and mouth, Sami's other hand going down to Jey and stroking his throbbing length as you were still moaning and panting, and Jey was fucking gone.

"Samiiiii!" Sami's name was the only thing Jey could muster up as his orgasm consumed him entirely, spilling its sweet, salty taste into Sami. Jey's sweet noises triggered your own orgasm, and you shuddered as Sami licked your sweet juices as you rode his face, licking slowly to ease you from your high. 

Sami grunted lowly as he orgasmed himself, spilling his seed into Jey, who was closing his eyes in overstimulation but waiting for Sami to finish. And as soon as he were finished you fell limp against Jey, your body completely spent from your climax. 

Sami smiled at the sight of the both of you passed out on each other, feeling pride and elation at finally winning a battle for control. 

"You both okay?" Sami asked sweetly, leaning down to kiss both your cheeks gently while brushing the hair out of your eyes.

Jey grumbled incoherently, his mouth forming a frown as he rolled over so he was facing his bedsheets. "Yeet."

Sami just laughed at him fondly and pulled you closer to him, wrapping his muscular arms around your waist and kissing your cheek lightly.

"What about you?" You groaned and turned to face him properly, pressing your nose into his chest. "Mmmm, mmm I'm tiredddd.... So very tired." Sami rubbed circles onto the small of your back soothingly, giggling at your adorableness and letting out a content sigh. 

"Rest up. I'm not finished with either of you tonight."

It took you several seconds to register his words and then you smirked devilishly, rolling up onto your elbows and staring at him teasingly. "You're bluffing."

Sami raised an eyebrow at you. You should know by know he never bluffs when it comes to you and Jey. He adjusted both your handcuffs so you could move more with them, and Jey also rolled onto his side so he now faced you as well, his hand reaching out to brush your curls aside.

"Man, you just wore us out. Wait a damn minute." Jey grumbled into your neck before kissing you deeply, his tongue swirling inside of your mouth eagerly.

"Didn't you just say to wait a minute?" Sami teased , his finger tracing patterns on Jey's stomach. Jey sucked in a breath as Sami pressed a little harder into him, before you gently pushed Sami off of Jey and straddled him, making Jey groan as his dick  jerked beneath you.

"Not now, I need time, I'm still kinda sore." Jey muttered after pulling away from you slightly.

"Hmmm... we can give you some time." Sami responded suggestively, his hand cupping your ass and pulling you downwards so you could lay down with him.

Jey instantly hardened again when he heard your mounds of pleasure and looked up to see Sami licking a stripe up your ass,  his other hand moving down your thigh until he reached your wet pussy, his hot, rough fingers gliding across your folds as he slid one of his fingers into you with ease. 

Jey tugged on Sami's leg to get his attention, since he was still handcuffed and had limited mobility. Sami chuckled at Jey's pouty look, and looked down to meet Jey's eyes, and understood what Jey wanted.

You whined at the loss of Sami's hand and mouth on you, but that whine turned into a moan as Sami lifted you and placed you on Jey's cock,  his thick shaft filling you completely while Sami filled you up from behind, his own moans of pleasure making you feel even hotter. 

"I told you, tonight I'm in control." Sami growled out his promise into your ear huskily as he started rocking his hips against yours, making your moans turn into loud gasps, in turn making Jey groan against your neck.

Let's just say, for the rest of the night he defiantly made sure to keep that promise.

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Little Talks (Of Monsters and Men)

You're gone, gone, gone away; I watched you disappear/All that's left is a ghost of you Now we're torn, torn, torn apart; there's nothing we can do/Just let me go, we'll meet again soon/Now wait, wait, wait for me; please hang around/I'll see you when I fall asleep

"It's such a happy song, in sound, but it's about a woman and her dead lover, both of them singing call and response to one another. missing each other, the dead having to watch the living grieve them. and the bridge is both of them at once and just. oh my god"

No Children (The Mountain Goats)

I hope that our few remaining friends/Give up on trying to save us/I hope we come up with a fail-safe plot/To piss off the dumb few that forgave us/I hope the fences we mended/Fall down beneath their own weight/And I hope we hang on past the last exit/I hope it’s already too late

I hope it stays dark forever/I hope the worst isn't over....And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out/You'd stay the hell out of my way

I am drowning/There is no sign of land/You are coming down with me/Hand in unlovable hand

And I hope you die/I hope we both die

"The song of all time. It's the soundtrack for countless bad vibes ships (affectionate). The phrase 'hand in unlovable hand' has immutably altered the brain chemistry of thousands with its underlying sentiment and launched a hundred accompanying memes. 'I hope you die, I hope we both die' crams such incredible rawness and depth of feeling into all of nine words. It also makes for a great singalong."

"I need to leave. I need to LEAVE. I need to get out of this situation and I'd hope that if i found the strength to walk out, you'd stay the hell out of my way. I need to leave. Please. Let me out. HAND IN UN FUCKING LOVABLE HAND"

"Just. Man. These two are so broken. They want to be in love. They aren't. They hate each other so much. They are the only ones who understand each other. They wish that they weren't so close but all they can taste is ash when they think of leaving each other. Just, mutually assured destruction tastes so sweet when you can taste the blood on their tongue."

"It's No Children."

"goddd man this song is about being an irredeemable freak with another irredeemable freak and i think that's beautiful. there's something so fuck you up ish about the person you hate and despise the most in the world also being the only other person who is like you, who gets you. im going down, but youre going down too. we can be terrible people together... even if i hate you... even if you're the fucking worst. because we don't have anyone else. there's always a sort of comfort in knowing that there's someone out there who's as terrible as you are, and maybe you only hate them because you see yourself in them a little, too. anyway clay and bloberta from moral orel"

"The sheer emotion packed into the way it’s sung, the lyrics themselves, all of it just screams ‘clinging desperately to someone you hate because you don’t have anyone else and you burned those bridges yourself’ and I find that painfully relatable"

"It's a song about both virulent self-hatred and virulent hatred of someone else and yet you see yourself intertwined with that hated person forever."

Poll runner: Do I even have to add anything? This was the tournament's most submitted song.

No Children submitted by @leovaldezdefender + @diogenescynic2288 + many others

[redsrooftopprincess]

Pumpkin Sugar (Part 1)

Raphael x GN!Reader - Established Relationship

Part 1 . Part 2 . Part 3 . Part 4 . Epilogue (🌶️ Fem!Reader)

Based on this ask by @gornackeaterofworlds

More of a question to expand on than a detailed request, but would raph help a teacher reader grade papers?? Would he get invested in gossip on the kids??

I was zoning out and somehow thought about elementary school teacher readers, coming back to the lair with papers to grade, Donnie getting angry over the lesson plans you have to use, etc. And then, like always, raph thoughts(I am unbelievably gushy to raph x lil sweet cheery readers) Being oh so sleepy tired but still having work to do. Grading papers, getting activities printed and cut, weekly plans. I'd like to imagine he helps to get you to sleep faster, all the while listening to the venty yapping about which kids are troublemakers

Hi gornack! I hope you are feeling well. ♥️

Sorry this took so long. I want you to know that this started out as a simple fluffy fic, but Red disagreed. He wanted to make you smile.

I'm going to be splitting this into 4 parts (+ an epilogue) to make it easier to read because I accidentally went over the character limit in my notes app *twice*. I wasn't aware you could accidentally write a whole ass fic, but here we are. 😅

Special thanks to @the-cauldron-witch . The best brainstorming buddy I could honestly ask for. Could not have written this without you. 😁

"Come on, babe, please?"

You sigh, whining, "Raph..."

"I gotta head out early, you'll be asleep by the time I get back," he pleaded. He was only working a half night, but he had to leave right at sunset and head across town, so he wouldn't be home until well after 1:00 am, and you had school in the morning.

It had been a long day, and it still wasn't over yet.

You really did like your job. The kids were great, even when they misbehaved it wasn't their fault. There were just too many of them and not enough of you. You couldn't watch everybody all the time, but you still had to try. Third grade was a lot. Especially when you were managing 27 kids (you're grateful, you have colleagues managing 40+, and it's a fucking zoo).

Still, you tried to make things fun for them. Halloween is tomorrow, and you don't want to do the traditional boring "spooky" theme. So, you've decided to teach an entire class of 8-9 year olds a little bit about applied chemistry.

You were actually really excited! You'd picked up a bunch of foam pumpkins at the dollar store, which were currently being dragged in a cart behind you. You were planning on carving them into jack o'lanterns and teaching the kids how to make elephant toothpaste to ooze out of the holes. It's was going to be the most beautiful chaos, and with any luck, a memorable experience.

There was only one problem, you'd been dealing with meetings and trainings all week and unable to actually carve the damn pumpkins. Today there was an outage in part of the building, so you had to wait two hours to use the one copier available, and by the time you walked out you had zero gas left in the tank. You wanted to go home and finish your work so you could go to bed.

You reach the top of the stairs, exiting the subway at street level. The lair is literally in the opposite direction. You look south, towards your apartment.

"Please?" He asks again, his voice softening. You haven't seen him in days and you can hear in his voice that it's taking as much of a toll on him as it is you. "I'll help you with your school shit, whatever, I just... I gotta see you. Please?"

You sigh and turn around, heading north. You miss him, too.

...

He meets you at the door to the elevator, and despite your exhaustion, you can't help but smile. He had that effect. Comfort, safety, peace, love... Raphael is Home. And the moment you step inside his arms all of your tension melts away. Almost.

He picks you up in his arms and squeezes you tightly, swinging you gently back and forth as he buries his nose in your hair. He breathes you in and grins, chuckling quietly as you squeeze him back and press your face against his neck.

"What're you laughing at?" you ask, suspicious. He was way more... something... than normal... you're not entirely sure what. You raise your head with your eyes narrowed.

"Nothin'," he says, kissing you sweetly, "just happy to see you." Your eyes narrow further, but this seems to satisfy you. You kick your legs and whine and he sets you down.

Picking up the crate and carrying it casually under one arm (though, to be fair, the pumpkins are made of foam), he gestures you first into the elevator and follows behind. He takes your hand pretty much immediately, "So what're we working on?"

"Pumpkins," you sigh.

He waits a beat. Then another. "Okay... You gonna give me more than that, or..." He smirks down at you, laughing. He can't help it.

"Yeah, sorry," you laugh, "rough week." You shake your head, before looking up at him, "carving, specifically."

"Shit, why didn't you say so? I could've done the whole thing for you!" He laughs as you exit the elevator into the lower garage.

Donnie's working on the truck and you wave at him as you pass by. He gives you a bright smile and your suspicion grows. He's a bit too cheery for being elbow deep in his latest mechanical mess.

You make it to the living room and start unpacking everything. Foam pumpkins, sharpies, exacto knives, "that should be everything," you say, grabbing a gourd and sitting down on the couch. You tuck your legs up under you as Raph walks by behind, leaning down to kiss you on his way to the other side.

He only has about an hour before he needs to leave, but he spends it cuddled up next to you quietly carving pumpkins, an activity which he actually enjoys. All too soon, he's called away to his duties.

With a lingering kiss that leaves you missing him already, he's gone, and you're left with... so much work.

...

The pumpkins are taking longer than expected, and by midnight you're still not done. Mostly because, for a teacher, you really suck at learning your lesson, and you waited until the last minute. Again. And you didn't ask your boyfriend for help once you realized it was too much. Again.

Honestly, one word and he could have had this solved for you. You look over at your annual Family Pumpkin Carving Competition entries. Raph was no longer allowed to enter the contest because it wasn't fair. But he still did one because he enjoyed it. This year, it seems, he was feeling romantic.

It was a MASSIVE pumpkin almost to your shoulder. You have no idea how he even got it down here. Inside was a small table with several electric candles, illuminating the ballroom scene from Beauty and the Beast.

You set down the half-carved jack o' lantern, and sigh heavily, rubbing your eyes. You lean back on the couch, tucking your feet under you. You're just going to shut your eyes for a few seconds. You know that people always say that and they end up just falling asleep, but you really actually mean it, you'll close your eyes for a few minutes and then get back to work.

....

Tag list

@thelaundrybitch @the-cauldron-witch @fyreball66 @ninnosaurus @tmntngl @thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos @zagreustomb @ramielll @silverwatergalaxy @gornackeaterofworlds @footninja @daedric-sorceress @sophiacloud28 @iridescentflamingo

...

Part 1 . Part 2 . Part 3 . Part 4 . Epilogue (🌶️ Fem!Reader)

[feech]

okay guys I just spent 3 hours transcribing the interview at the end of the Torchwood audio "Serenity" (because I'm nothing if not extra) and have gained even more respect for the people who do this sort of thing for a living. but since I have it figure I might as well give it its own post so that other people can find and enjoy it if they wish.

Also let me know if you would be interested in transcripts of other Torchwood audios or interviews. Because I went looking for some a couple of weeks ago and couldn't find any (which is a damn shame and a bit of a nightmare sometimes) so if other people want them as well I might see what I can do to put them together.

contains spoilers for s2e2 "Sleeper" s3 "Children of Earth" and the audio drama "Serenity"

Scott: Hello my name's Scott Handcock I'm the director of Torchwood at Big Finish and I'm joined this afternoon byyyy

John: John Barrowman

Gareth: Gareth David-Lloyd

James: and James Moran

Scott: Welcome back! John and Gareth, this is the first time you've recorded together for a fewww years now.

Gareth: No we recorded last year!

John:  Yeah but we weren't together.

Gareth: No, we weren't. No we weren't together were we. No.

John: We had a transatlantic relationship.

 Gareth: you, you were by the pool in Palm Springs.

John: I was. I was bi-coastal.

Gareth:  and I was in a Cardiff bus stop. yeah.

John laughing

Scott: Just by Splott Meat Market!

John: Hey, I'd rather be in the Cardiff bus stop!...Not!

Scott:  But, I mean how is it I mean the chemistry between you is great even when you're not in the room. But is it nice to come back and play this stuff...live, as it were?

John: Yeah, I think that the one thing that's really nice about playing Jack, and also I'm sure Gareth, with playing Ianto, we had these characters embedded in our bodies and our souls so much that even I would say captain jacks like putting on a good coat which ironic because he has that great coat but its easy to get back into the characters. we didn't even have to do anything today when we started we just picked up. Its almost like picking up where we left off.

 Gareth: Yeah, its always a pleasure and it much easier when we're in a, in a room together. When were recording, when John's away you can sort of- you can sort of hear John saying the lines because we worked so much together but there's always this sort of  um an extra electricity when we're in the same place recording live.

John: Also the scenes, like the bedroom scenes and making out scenes are much easier to do because ya know hes right here.

Gareth:  yeah. and (unintelligible)

John:  and we really do!

Gareth: yeah.

everyone laughs

Scott: and James, welcome back to torchwood! its uh your first episode since- Children of Earth? is it?

James: It is. Yes. um.

John:  Which was brilliant James!

Gareth:  eh, All thanks to me.

James:  yeah.

John: e-ev, everyb-everybody, and that's the one, funny enough, Children of Earth's is- is the one that everybody says That's like, what- you know... changed their attitude for torchwood.

Scott:  Yeah, James your third episode was the last one that didn't kill Ianto. so um

James laughing

Scott: there you go.

Gareth: Thanks for that James. but um, but. yeah.

James:  But y- But I was in the room and I-I was, I was part of that decision and they, they didn't want to do it but I insisted. (Gareth:  you were, yeah. laughter)I said we've got to get rid of him (Scott: oh you're taking the flak for that now?) I was like no hes awful. awful character. awful actor. lets just end this misery now.

Gareth:  f*ck it I've got a shrine!

everyone laughs

Scott:  but how has it been revisiting the torchwood world an these characters particularly?

 James:  its amazing its just like like putting on sort of your favorite, your favorite outfit again! um its- um- ya know um its been such a long time but I didn't even have to think or sort of remind myself. It was just like I-I know this. I know this universe. I know these people. And I just I c- I couldn't wait to get back into it! and I was just saying in the other room, its such a pleasure to do an audio of this because you can have longer streams of dialogue than you would be able to in a TV episode. Because you've gotta, you've gotta get to things much more quickly and be more economical. um So its nice to just let- have scenes where you can just let things breathe a bit. And and knowing that they're gonna be together in the room, uh together in the booth as, well, not in the same booth that- that'd be weird

 Gareth:well, give it time.

James:  Just knowing that they're gonna be together so that, so that they can riff off each other and it just it just let me kinda have some ridiculous strings of dialogue! Which I'm just,- I'm in the other room, I'm literally laughing at my own jokes like, like a lunatic

Scott: yes.

Gareth laughing

Scott: Yeah, John and Gareth as uh Jack and Ianto you get to play the sort of Happy Couple in this has that been a fun dynamic (Gareth: Yes!) to explore? sending yourself up a bit?

Gareth: Great fun! That's really good fun! Yeah okay, you can, you sort of see, if they did sort of end up together in a- in a perfect world would this sort of be where they'd end up? Um I doubt it. But it is a lot of fun to put them in that sit- to dump them in that situation and let it play out.

 John: As we've been doing this one today I think that- uh and listening to it- I think it would be a great one if it was ever filmed. you know what I mean? (Gareth: mm) its one of those things that visually it would be fantastic also the playing that they do together because you know it uhh...

Gareth: It would be all the little looks and-

John: Well yeah, all the little looks and the stuff and the subtleties. Because actually if you take it, if you think about it, the heightened reality of what torchwood is anyway- um you know there's those little looks and subtleties that happen you know when they're being normal jack and ianto. However this way they're getting i-i-i- its- its more obvious and more in each other's face? rather than on the side or behind each other's back. Does that make any sense? (Gareth: mm) So it it'd be quite fun to do that. But I-I think its fun and the- the visual of uh some of the stuff that's happening. Like I love, at the end, when uh ya know their house is the only one that's not on fire and its "OPE there it goes!" (Gareth chuckles) And that, you know, so its, they're just and the normality. I know this sounds really strange but for the n- the the way that they're treated as normal in the neighborhood. (Gareth: mm) And they're a male couple, is- is also pretty cool, because its uh you know its it shows the the change of times and how, and- and actually then that kind of perfect world- (trails off as Scott starts talking)

Scott: and obviously this is a sequel to the TV story Sleepers

John: Correct.

Gareth: Spoilers!

Scott: What are your memories of filming that epis- and, and writing that episode?

John: that, well that was one of the episodes that was really, for us it was quite a challenge because we were filming it in... Do you remember the name of the military base Gareth?

Gareth: I don't, no.

John: well it was a military base in Wales and it was, uh... we had- we used it quite a few times, but this time in particular all of us had to uh get a little dirty? And also we were doing a lot of running around and it was one of the biggest explosions that we had ever done on the TV show. And I remember it was we were running away, I think it was... were we all running away from the explosion Gareth?

Gareth: Uh I don't- I don't think I was there that day I-

John: No, I think it might've just been Eve and I 

Gareth: I think I was still...hub boy

 James: Lots of explosions! I w- uh they, they liked to say that I spent the whole budget for the series with that one.

Scott: Well, I remember you blew up uhhh a building on Westgate street, (Gareth: a bank) in Cardiff. (James: Yeahh!!)(Gareth: that was incredible!) and it made the news because people assumed it was a terrorist attack.

James: yeah, but that th- that was kind of- that was all a bit overblown. Uh because they did actually tell everyone that they were doing it. And it was planned months in advance so I- I don't think anyone was actually frightened or scared (Gareth: it was it was what the newspapers said) I think the newspapers, it was the newspaper wasn't it, yeah.

John:  But it did bring us extra publicity so we were glad of it!

James: exactly!

Gareth: They went 'Bloody Torchwood!'

everyone laughing

 James: Yeah, I put you through a lot in that. There's uh that amazing circus, you and Eve again, um in the hospital when the windows blow in and you get you get covered in shit.

 John: Yeah! I remember running down the hallway and she, she said to me "what  are we gonna do?" and I said "just stay under my arm and i'll make sure nothing hits you." and it just went and uh we got covered in the glass. For those of you who don't know, in explosions, the glass is not made out of glass. Its made out of either sugar, its called candy glass. But also then when they're doing the explosion and its a close up shot they're throwing rubber glass at you! (Gareth chuckles) So and it gets stuck in your hair. Yeah, that was a good, that was a really good episode! that was, uh pretty awesome.

 James: Yeah and they gave everyone earplugs and I was like "I don't need earplugs! they're air cannons!  They're just gonna go phoo." (John:  NO.) and then they went off and it was like "OH MY GOD!!"

Gareth: BOOM!!

John:  That's why you're uh a l- you know a little hard of hearing now

James: Eh?

everyone laughing

James: Ha ha ha textbook.

Gareth: There you go.

Scott: And finally, just to wrap up, if Jack and Ianto were to live happily ever after, (John: *fake snore*)(Gareth laughing) how do you think it would, what would they do?

Gareth continues laughing

John:  Well I dont mean that in that way!! I'm like i- umff, Of course you're gonna ask that question! (I can't make this phrase out)

Scott: You know, If Jack and Ianto were to live happily ever after how do you think they would go about it?

John: Well listen, I think they would get a dog. what do you think Gareth?

Gareth: I-I- uh I think Ianto would responsibly say we're not having kids as long as we're working for um uh a secret organization that hunts aliens. um

John: but I think Jack  would s- all of the sudden, being that his... as he gets a little more empathetic with things, he would be bringing things home, for instance-

Gareth:  Alien children?

 John:  Alien children. Or things that they had to take care of before they could send back. And so you would have this kind of, menagerie of things in the house that they would have to keep secret. Kind of like if I were to like, ya know, refer to another show there's a- an animated show out there where they, its a couple with two kids living with an alien. you know the one I'm talking about? (Gareth: mhmm) um uh and its uh- so I think it would be, but in a more serious way they would have that kind of relationship.

Gareth: yeah that uh th- its quite a good idea actually! the f- um That'd be quite a good episode! (John: it would!) You know them finding like an alien baby and they have to look after it. And seeing  that sort of domesticity between Jack and Ianto, that's quite good.

John: And the baby would be

Gareth: One for the uh-

John: One for the, No but listen the baby. If it was, the baby could be gender non-specific! so it would be, it w- it wouldn't be male/fe- it would be, I guess you would call it fluid! (Gareth: mhmm!) and how they would have to teach it and it would grow up and they'd have it secretly and privately grow up in their lives!

Gareth: Its getting bigger. The idea's getting bigger now dunno

John: yeah!

James: If, if they- I think if they did end up together like that, and they disbanded torchwood, I think they'd last about two weeks before they started solving crimes in their local area. (everyone laughing) They'd be so, just like, we need some, we need some action! We need some, we need some fun!

John:  I just wanna see an episode with Gareth, w- or, or- uh the visual in my mind, with Gareth pregnant!

James laughing

Scott: On which note, I'll draw this little conversation to close. (John: Thank you!) uh. Thank you all for chatting with me. (John: Always a pleasure!) And thank you listeners for listening.

John:  yeah, Thank you.

Gareth: Thank you. Thank you.

James:  Thank you!

Scott: Byee!!

[idkhow-ks]

Smackdown 6/6/25 — 10pm Hour

6-Women Tag Match cont'd, Tag Division

Perez is so good at selling and making things look so smooth

That Riptide reversal into a DDT was awesome!! Roxanne and Rhea seem to have great in ring chemistry. More please!

Great character choice by Naomi! You're my competition tomorrow, why would I help you? Love when heels are consistent with their motivations

Look at those three goth girls standing in the ring together. Love how the women are getting to express their personal styles more and more.

Why is Solo the main character of this episode?

OH MY GOD can Fatu just punch Solo in the face already?!?!?

These vignettes are always so well done. And also I immediately feel for thinking my TV was glitching.

OOOO is Uncle Howdy going to cause all the tag teams to break up? I'm intrigued.

I think only Los Garza and MCMG haven't teased a break up so that's a good angle.

Yes Tez love the focus, love the leadership.

I don't watch NXT that often so I don't know Fraxiom but I kind of feel like they're unnecessary here.

The draft or a superstar shakeup needs to happen soon because the tag divisions are lopsided right now. Smackdown has too many big name teams and Raw doesn't have enough.

Also I want team vs team feuds not every team getting into everyones business.

The tag division contains multitudes and should have more than one segment on a three hour episode of Smackdown! Like come on!

The DIY vs MCMG program should have moved away from the belts and become a grudge match where they had all the different singles match combos on the way to a PPV match.

That's something that's really lacked in WWE this year as a whole. There are only so many belts. The writers need to find ways to make feuds stand on their own like with Drew vs Punk.

Penta/Andrade vs Creed Brothers

I hate that the Creed Brothers are jobbing on behalf of Chad. They're so good. They should be winning.

This is a pet peeve of mine only because I now live in Ohio but the Ohio Valley isn't really in Ohio, it straddles Ohio and Kentucky. The Creeds are from Northern Ohio not the Ohio Valley. Like I get that billed from places aren't 'true' but why not just bill them from "The State of Ohio" that sounds better.

Andrade that's not how you get a ref to pay attention!

Yay Chad left!

I actually like Chad btw just not the current story line.

Love that JoeTess doesn't know which one is Julius and which one is Brutus lolol.

It is still crazy to see Canadian/Mexican destroyers all over WWE now.

Oh good Seth is here...

Do they have a faction name yet?

This is the best looking/least ridiculous outfit Seth has worn in months!

Bron shouldn't be wearing business pants. It looks wrong.

RIP Penta lolol.

Hi Jason Jordan. Go talk some sense into Chad please!

Unnamed Faction Talks Nonsense, Cody and Jey Promo

Seth and friends? The Paul Heyman Guys? What are we calling them?

Is Roman making a return? He's getting a lot of mentions tonight.

Oh maybe the Bronsons will interfere tomorrow and Sami and Punk will come out to negate them and then Roman will return to take out Seth personally?

That could work.

I'll hear Cody out but once Logan Paul is on the screen I'll be tuning out.

Oh Cody doesn't get to speak lolol. Hi Jey.

Look at Cody with his meme references.

It's not about the titles for you Cody but Jey is going to be so vulnerable with the briefcase in play.

Jey deserves to have his title run be about him and not everything else that's happening around him.

Hi John.

Oh there's Paul, I'm out.

Sorry for clogging up the dash y'all but this was fun for me! I don't know if I'll do it for MitB but I want to start putting my opinion out there more. My therapist said it might be good for me to make friends that share my interests. What a crazy idea, right?

[starseneyes]

Part IV - Destiel Meta - Dean Winchester / Castiel - Supernatural

You read Part I, Part II, Part III, and still want to read more of my insane ramblings!? Wow. I think I love you.

This was the wildest Meta I've ever written. And the longest continuous Meta for me, too! I hope someone out there gets a fraction of the enjoyment reading it that I got writing it.

WARNING: These are just my opinions. We all have our own head cannons and I don't think mine's more valid than anyone else's!

SPOILERS: Everything is fair game. I hold nothing back from the series.

Good to go? Yeah, we're good. Let's dive in.

S11E01 -

Oh, goody, the weird Darkness arc where Dean’s supposed to have sexual tension with a woman and it just doesn’t land.

Look, I’ve said before—chemistry is or isn’t. And there are others who I am sure saw Dean and Amara together and were just waiting for them to rip their clothes off and claim one another as the new creation.

I’m just not one of them.

And it’s not the Destiel clouding me. I mean, I’ve seen Dean have some mad chemistry with some of his hookups.

This one just never read as sexual to me… more an incomprehensible drawing of the one who unleashed the Darkness and the Darkness itself.

Oh. My. Gosh. It’s Zuul and Vinz from Ghostbusters. Like, no chemistry, but a strange drawing to one another. And, yes, I know how that ended, but I didn’t like that one, either, even as a kid.

There is no Dean. Only Zuul.

“Where the hell are you, Cas?” I’m, I’m okay.” “You don’t sound okay.” “Dean, I am fine. Besides, what I have, you can’t help me.” “What do you mean what you have?” “Just, please tell Sam Rowena escaped with the Book of the Damned and Codex.” “Okay, forget Rowena, where are you?”

Dean can hear how bad off Cas is—and he’s scared.

The last time he saw Cas, he beat the shit out of him. And now it sounds like things have only gotten worse.

That’s bound to activate some of Dean’s Protective Hubby status, especially now that the Mark’s gone.

“Now, you tell me, the Mark.” “Oh, really, you’re worried about me after everything that I-”

Yes, Dean. After everything. After all the things he knows you’ve done. After all the things you’ve done to him. After all the things he’s done to you.

After everything you will still be Cas and Dean.

“Dean. Is it gone?” “Yes, I’m good. I mean, I’m not great.”

Look at the relief on Castiel’s face. He needed that. He needed to hear that it worked. That Dean Winchester—his Dean Winchester—would still walk the Earth, no matter what happened to Cas next.

“Sam. Dean. Goodbye. It may be some time before we see one another again.”

And Dean’s trying to keep Cas on the line, to get more information from him, to know that he’s going to be okay. But he is far from okay.

“We can’t save Cas if we’re stuck in a hospital, okay?”

The mission shifts. Because Dean fucked Castiel up (derogatory) the last time they saw one another, and now he knows the Angel’s in deep shit. And he wants to save him.

He wants to be the one. He has to do something good for him after all the bullshit.

Because Sam didn’t give up on his big brother. And Cas didn’t give up on his maybe something. And much as Dean protested at the time, he’s here and he needs to protect the people he loves, again.

S11E02 -

“Near as I can tell, when you have to choose between Heaven and the Winchesters, you choose them, every time. So, you see, you’re not my brother.”

Oh, good, return of the Dick Angels. And, yes, I combined them up there. They’re not worth the quotation marks.

Hannah?! Fucking Hannah is going to be the savior?!

Oh, nevermind. Good, I always knew she was a bitch. I feel vindicated.

“Help me.”

Gotta love that he fixed his tie before going to them. Like, seriously, what a weird choice, Cas.

S11E03 -

“Sorry about those, Cas. Til we know what’s goin on with you, you're still a bit of a wild card, you know?”

Why the fuck didn’t we use those on you, Dean!? You were all like, “Sure, I’m slaying left and right like everyone’s worst bloody nightmare, but I’m good”.

Two seconds of “something’s off with Cas” and the chains go on. Gee wiz.

“Cas, you alright pal? … It appears I simply respond differently than humans.”

And while Cas is trying just to sit upright, the Winchesters are stage-whispering about how much worse he’s getting.

Y’all, he could hear you through the door when he was in Betrayal Mode. You really think barely lowering your voice is going to do anything when he’s two feet away at the next table!?

Seriously, Winchesters. He’s an Angel.

“You think it’s crappy?” “Eye of the beholder.”

I love how Dean’s the one to reassure Cas. Because, we all see value in different place, right?

And this is another case of Cas seeing a value that Dean can’t—Cas saw the value in his car. He sees the value in Dean.

It’s such a little thing, but I like the consistency in character, there.

Cas seizures and falls, and the boys run to him.

Interestingly enough, before the fade to black, the only voice we hear calling out to Cas is Dean’s.

Probably meant nothing when someone wrote it that way, but then little ole fans like me wander in and go, “Coincidence? I think not” (thanks The Incredibles).

I mean, yeah, this one’s probably a coincidence, but it’s more fun out here in delulu land.

When he wakes, he sees Sam there, but Dean’s the one touching him, a hand on the shoulder.

“It’s like I was inside a blender that was set to puree for a tomato salsa.” “And you’re the tomato.” “In this analogy, yes.” {Sam stares}

Damnit, Sam! They were having a moment. Yes, I know you’re concerned about Cas and whatnot, but that was cute.

They help him up and Dean places a blanket over Cas, leaving a hand on his shoulder. He only removes the hand when Cas starts talking about the voices.

“First thing’s first.”

I kinda love that Heaven’s priority is Metatron, and Dean’s is Castiel. I mean, wow. Wanna talk about how things have shifted, how things have changed.

They could go after Metatron to deal with the Darkness, but Cas comes first.

He’s down so bad for the little winged Angel and he doesn’t even know it!

“And your friend with the bent halo? He goes foaming at the mouth mad and dies.”

Well, this is new one to the “ways to describe the broken Angel” category. Poor little Castiel.

“Your wee pal Castiel wouldn’t be in this pickle if you’d done what you’d promised.”

She says this to Sam, but it’s a nice twist of the knife in Dean’s ribs.

“Cas. Let her go.”

He listens. Through the fucking spell cast by one of the most powerful witches in existence, Castiel hears Dean. Tell me that’s not fucking love!

“It’s gonna be alright, buddy, okay?”

And then Cas gets a turn to beat the shit out of Dean. Seriously, if these two would just go to couples’ counseling, a lot of this could be avoided.

Yes, I know. I know. Magic Spell. Mark of Cain. Lots of other magic, supernatural bullshit.

Cas starts to seizure and Dean—who is already on his knees—drops lower to be close to the same level as him. Dean lifts Castiel’s face, cupping the Angel’s face with his right hand, the other on his shoulder.

Dean helps him to sit up, then places a hand on either side of his face, holding his eyes before patting him on the shoulder, right hand still cupping his face.

“Dean, I… there aren’t words.” “You’re right, there aren’t words, Cas, ’cause there’s no need.”

And that’s still my over-reaching theory for these two and Heaven. Dean will never need to tell Cas that things are different since they said goodbye, that he’s had the chance to examine their relationship through the eyes of love—something that never occurred to him before.

His mother and Bobby already know. No doubt, they’ve told John, so he’s up to speed.

So when the Angel and Dean show up for family get-togethers and hanging at the bar, seeing one with an arm around the other is commonplace.

No words are needed.

But, I’m getting way ahead on this one.

“You were under a spell, it’s fine.” “Yeah, but you had Rowena. Because of me, you-” “You know, Cas, we’ve got the codex. That’s a start.”

Sam tries to comfort Castiel, who always sees himself as a burden to those he loves. Heaven treats him as broken, and he wants so badly to do well for these humans—his chosen family.

It’s almost worse to let down your chosen family, you know? The people who found in life and thought, “Yup, they’re mine!”

Because that kind of love isn’t demanded by custom and blood, but forged in fire and hope.

“Dean, I can fix that.” “No, no, no. It’s fine, Cas. Besides, I had it coming.”

Dean looks up to meet Cas’ eyes. It’s purposeful.

I don’t know if either of them told Sam how bad it was—how close Dean came to killing Castiel under the weight of the Mark of Cain.

And they haven’t discussed that at all.

Look how Castiel responds to that. The little tilt of the head. The “oh, darling” expression in his eyes as his mouth closes.

Dean doesn’t use a lot of words, but Castiel knows enough what this is—his penance. His apology. His punishment for what he did to Cas.

Dean turns away, but looks back at Cas, briefly. He’s lingering on that moment where he almost made one of the worst choices of his life. So, he’ll take this pain, damnit, because it’s nothing compared to the emotional pain he’s not ready to deal with.

And this whole sequence cuts Sam out like he isn’t even there (Hell, Padalecki probably wasn’t there at all because it’s not his coverage)—because this conversation is about Dean and Cas.

It’s only after Cas sits that we see Sam, again, looking between the two.

S11E04 -

They shot an entire episode… from the car’s perspective!? How many cameras? My production mind has so many questions!

Sure, bottle episode, blah, blah, blah. But now that we’re waiting 2+ years for streamers to release 10 episode seasons, I’d gladly take back the 22-26 seasons every few months even if it meant there were some filler episodes and bottle episodes in there.

We didn’t know how good we had it.

“Cas is getting better, so theres that. Still wants to fix your-” “I’m fine. 100%.” “Alright, well, he’s not. He still needs more time to heal. “Maybe, guess we got nothing to do but get better.”

It says a lot that even after Dean said he deserved it, Cas still wants to fix it. He always wants to fix it, especially for Dean.

“Cas, you’ve got one job to do, and that’s heal, you understand?”

Look at these two. So stubborn. So similar. Castiel knows that Dean would be doing the exact damn thing—trying to help when he should probably be resting. And Dean’s trying to take care of the damn Angel, but he’s so resistant.

“You think he’s gonna be okay?” “He just needs some time, you know? We all do.”

He keeps talking about the “we” here needing healing and restoration. I don’t know if our boy is finally realizing he can’t bounce back like he did in his 20’s, or whatnot, but it’s recurrent in this episode.

Also, I wonder how much Castiel told them about his torture at the hands of other Angels, at how they told him he is entirely unwelcome. He has been cut off by the only family he ever knew, even when he begged for mercy and help.

But the Winchesters—despite Dean nearly killing him and he beating the shit out of Dean not a week later—are there for him. His chosen family.

So, if he has to stay home and heal, he’s going to try to do something productive with the time he has.

And, I’m sorry, can I join the Bob Seger sing-a-long because that shit is fucking adorable. Oh, it’s nice when the show reminds us that these brothers do have good times together. They need that. We need that.

We need the reminders of what we’re fighting for.

And, yes, this is a show. It’s a television show that’s been off the air for five years. But it means something to us.

In the real world, there’s so much going on right now that’s tough and terrifying. But I choose to rebel by injecting as much joy as I can into my life. And I love cheering for my friends who are experiencing joy.

Because we’re all beautiful, as we are. And there are factors trying to take away our rights, to silence our voices, to restrict our movements, to overwhelm us to the point we shut down.

But if we remember what we’re fighting for, we can help carry each other through. Even if one of us loses faith for a while, others will carry the torch so the light is never-ending, still guiding us toward that indestructible construct—hope.

Television shows may seem like throw away things, but even a TV show can give us hope. For many, Supernatural is the show they put on when the world goes to shit. It’s a comfort in trying times.

Entertainment is often billed as pulpy or unworthy of attention if it doesn’t strike certain tones or themes, but I think that’s bullshit. Because entertainment, characters, stories… these are the magic.

So, yes, I love when Supernatural shows these boys actually functioning as brothers who get a minute just to be together and experience a moment where they aren’t drenched in blood or burdens.

Sometimes sometimes they just sing along with the radio. And that’s beautiful.

“Really? You don’t ever want something more?” “I’m sorry. Have you met us? We’re batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs.”

Bro, you’ve been in a domestic partnership with an Angel (formerly) of the Lord for a few years, now. But because Cas isn’t running around in a frilly apron making you meatloaf, you don’t see it.

“You don’t ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever, but… something? You know with a Hunter? Somebody who understands the life?”

Y’all are just being obtuse, now. Hmmm. Who do we know that Dean has a more-than-friends but not-brotherly affectionate and loving relationship with? Who? Hmmm. I wonder…

“Come on, man. That quote? ’God helps those who help themselves?’ God didn’t say that. That’s not even in the Bible. That’s an old proverb that dates back to Aesop. … I read.”

Dean [No Middle Name] Winchester, can you just stop and accept that you’re fucking smart!? Sometimes he is so committed to putting everyone in their boxes that he thinks that both he and Sam can’t be smart—only one of them. And he’ll choose Sammy every time.

Give yourself more credit, damn it!

And how wild is it that the boys both dream of a normal life? Because Dean will never admit it and never pursue it. But, some part of him does want it.

“Cas? You okay?”

I love that his first thought it that something must be wrong with Castiel, and that’s why he’s calling. And then Castiel ends up being the one freaked out, crying Dean’s name over and over.

And then Dean just leaves him, again, to decapitate the guy.

“Alright, Cas, you there?” “Of course. What’s going on?”

Him and his “of course” to Dean. I guess that’s his “As you wish”, right?

“Thanks, Cas. Good work. Way to come off the bench.”

All those words of affirmation for his little Angel. Gosh, I love when he gives Castiel those little morsels to hold onto after all the horrors of the Angels. Dean doesn’t even realizing he’s doing it, but it matters.

“We’ll get Cas to fix you up.” “Only if he fixes you up, too.” “Okay, Mom.”

He finally gives in to letting Cas help, but only because Sam pushed him. Good.

S11E05 -

“What do you want to do about Cas?” “Oh, he’s knee-deep in binge watching The Wire. Just started Season 2.” “Oh, yeah, he’s not coming out anytime soon.”

They both know Cas is shaken up bad. So, maybe he did tell them about the bullshit with the Angels and my (least) favorite Angel, Hannah.

S11E06 -

“Oh, what, you think he’s ready? He’s had a pretty rough go of it lately.” “Which one of us hasn’t?”

I forgot Season 11 is where Dean and Sam switch when it comes to Cas, where Dean becomes the more protective one and Sam gets more exasperated.

I know I talk a lot about how Dean’s feelings for Cas get deeper when he loses him, but I think that whole “nearly killing Castiel” thing also fucked with him pretty bad.

Because, he nearly did it. He was inches from doing it. And Castiel still didn’t give up on him.

Who, besides his little brother, would have been willing to go through all that and not utter a word or demand an apology? Castiel understands, and so Dean doesn’t have to use words. Cas just knows.

But, now his Protective Hubby mode might actually be hurting more than it’s helping.

“Seems insane to leave our one and only Angel friend on the bench.” “I’ll call him.”

We’ve come a long way from “Why does it always have to be me to make the call?” to Dean willingly offering to make the call. And Dean steps away from Sam to make it, too, putting distance between himself and his brother.

And that is fascinating to me, because he doesn’t want Sam to overhear. He wants to just focus on talking to Cas and try to get him off the bench.

“Cas. How you doing, buddy?”

Castiel is caught up in daytime television—the kind of stuff I only really watched with babysitters and my abuella when she took me sometimes in the Summer. There’s a reason I would excuse myself to read on the back porch, instead.

“Well, you sound weird, okay? Bad weird. … So, do me a favor. Turn off the TV. Go outside and get some air. We’re int he dark here, pal. I need you back in the game, okay?”

He tried. He tried to get through. And he was honest.

But just approaching the door is bringing on a wave of trauma… of beating the shit out of Dean again. Of Dean, again saying, “This isn’t you”. He sees the other Angels, all the pain he’s wrought.

And we never get to see the Leviathan arc properly because so much of that season he’s gone and under Naomi’s control. But, I imagine if there was footage, that’d be in here, too.

Yes, Castiel has done some horrible things before. And sometimes things roll off you and sometimes they don’t, and you can’t explain why. That’s this whole bloody affair.

And at the end of the whole flashback sequence—book ending with him beating the shit out of Dean—is Cain-marked Dean kicking his ass while he never fought back, merely tried to block the blows.

Cas ends up back watching television—giving him an unexpected break in the case. See, Mom? Binge-watching can be helpful!

“You are broken, Castiel. You were always a bit of a nancy, but this?”

I’m sorry. Did he just call Castiel gay!? I mean, I’m not a fan of derogatory words, but this is implying Cas has always been noticeably different.

“Look, Guys, I’m as glad as anyone that Stella got her groove back, but you let Metatron go?” “Dean, how many times are you gonna repeat that question?”

Enough for the audience to catch up, I suspect, and no more.

“He’s not a threat to us.”

Us. Castiel sees himself as part of the team, part of the family. Finally.

“She overpowered me. End of story.”

Except Castiel can detect lies. He knows there’s something Dean’s not telling him, and Sam can see from Cas’ reaction that something’s up.

S11E07 -

“This is everything Cas dug up in Gaza, every last bit of pre-Biblical lore.”

We remember you, buddy! Even if you aren’t with us.

S11E10 -

Dean’s a mess with the poisoning, so Castiel finds him blowing chunks on the side of the road.

“Dean. I came as soon as you called. Are you alright?” “Cas?” {spews} “You’re not alright.” “Obviously.”

Castiel appears to be going through something he saw on a medical drama. Because, we know he can detect things just from observation.

Okay, I’m sorry, Amara carved a message on Castiel’s chest so he just had to flash it at Dean? Okay, yeah, you talked big game about how insignificant Cas is, but your little puppet, Dean, has a mighty connection to this little Angel.

And now he can’t stop staring at the Angel’s nipples. So, yeah, not sure you knew what you were doing there, babe.

And what was that choice of Dean looking over at Cas very confused and unsure how to feel during Lucifer’s little dance party? It caught my eye, made me laugh, and made me wonder many things.

I mean, this episode is all over the place, but I’m not mad. Just confounded.

And… we begin the Casifer Arc.

S11E11 -

“Hello, Dean.” “Right, yeah.” … “I’m sorry.”

Starting small with classic Cas phrases. There you go, Casifer. Gotta ease into it a bit. And, damnit, this is that thing that is hard for me to do—watching something uncomfortable.

Like, to Dean it isn’t. He has no idea his buddy’s a vessel for hellfire and damnation. But, for me, I’m screaming at him going, “No! No! Don’t open up to fucking Lucifer!”

I’m as bad as my Uncle yelling at the Washington Commanders not to fumble the ball during a playoff. Yes, he’s a Commanders fan. No, there’s nothing I can do about it.

“I’ve had two shots at Amara. I struck out both times. … I don’t even know where to start.”

Yes, I’m cutting out the Casifer stuff because it’s not Cas.

But Dean thinks it’s Cas, so he unloads and shares everything. And it’s uncomfortable to me because Castiel is in there, somewhere, missing his human confiding in him.

Because Dean trusts Castiel in ways he doesn’t trust anyone else. He loves Cas in ways he doesn’t love anyone else. And if Lucifer was aware of their whole thing, oh, wow, is he hearing alarm bells about it, now.

He’s got Castiel’s vessel and memories and emotions and feelings swimming around in there. And he’s got Dean three inches from his face pouring his heart out in the dark.

And I’m not the first to make the following point, but it goes along with what I’ve always thought—Castiel accepts Dean as he comes. He would never judge him for whatever’s going on between him and Amara.

I mean, Dean beats the shit out of him, and Castiel does not judge. Dean murders a bunch of people, and while calling him on his shit, Castiel does not judge.

Dean. It’s not your Angel! Run!!

And when he puts the hand on the shoulder like that? It’s wrong. Something’s off. It’s not right. And some part of Dean knows it.

Okay. phew Made it through one Dean-doesn’t-know-it’s-Lucifer scene. But it wasn’t easy.

I don’t know why I’m this way. Truly! I don’t like to be uncomfortable. I can handle some gore and dark themes and murders and serial killers and so much more. But give me an uncomfortable scene and I’m still 12 years old looking between my fingers.

“Cas gone?” “Yeah, I guess so.” “What was he doing here, anyway?” “He was looking for lore on the darkness. Something a little off about him, too.”

Yes, Dean. Yes. You know your husband well enough by now to know when something’s wrong. He’s not your Angel!

If Sam hadn’t dismissed it so quickly, you might have followed it and figured it out earlier.

S11E12 -

“What about you, you hear from Cas?”

Nobody’s heard from Cas since the cage, my friends. You just don’t know it, yet.

S11E13 -

Dean, Dean, Dean. If you’re with someone with any skills, you don’t end up with hickey at age 40, just sayin’.

And I looked it up, and Dean was 37 in this season, roughly, but just sayin’. I stopped leaving marks like that in my teens, and the last time I saw a peer with one, he was 22 or so.

Dean, my man, find better lovers. cough Castiel cough

Also, glad he finally opened up to Sam about his Amara pull. At least he knows it’s not love. He might not know much about love, but that ain’t it.

S11E14 -

Oh, goodie, Rachel gets to be uncomfortable, again. Dean-o, can you just, I dunno, skip the “Maybe Cas isn’t as off as I think” phase, this time?

We did it when he was working with Crowley in Season 6. We did it when he came back in Season 7 and didn’t have all his faculties. We did it in Season 8 when he was being controlled by Naomi.

At some point you gotta trust your instincts and go, “that’s not my Angel!” C’mon!

But, more credit to Collins and those damn micro expressions. Even when Lucifer is trying to be comforting, or speak as he believes Cas would, there’s an edge to it.

Our Cas, when speaking lovingly, has a gentle quality, like he’s trying not to disturb someone who has a gun pointed at him with an itchy trigger finger. Casifer’s eyes are hardened, lacking in any softness.

Damn, man.

I mean, until Supernatural, the only thing I’d seen Collins in was an episode of Timeless where I was so impressed I immediately looked up his IMDB to see what else he might’ve been in.

When I saw Supernatural, I exclaimed, “Oh, it’s the Angel!” because though I didn’t really get into the show during its first run, I’m terminally online.

I mean, y’all—all two of you—are reading this on Tumblr, a site I’ve been on about 15 years. If we’re here, we’re all terminally online.

Something else that is fascinating about the cinematography here is the choice of who to feature in two-shots. We’re getting a lot less of Dean and Casifer, and that honestly helps make things feel… off.

Like, as a viewer I was watching and trying to figure out what felt wrong about the scene. And if it was purposeful, wow, it was beautifully done. I know that something’s wrong, here.

Oooh, and we’re at the iconic GIFs. The GIFs I saw before the episode of Collins switching on a dime from Casifer to Cas, and even without sound I knew to tell the two apart.

“I’ll just say, ’Dean’.” {pauses, holds up finger, lowers voice and turns on puppy dog eyes} “Dean.”

And the subtitles say “imitating Castiel’s gruff voice” and I have to say, I’ve never thought of it as “gruff”. Gravely, maybe, but not gruff. He’s too pookybear!

As Lucifer goes to kill Sam, Castiel steps in.

“Hello, Castiel.”

Damn, that Angel’s got some fight. Fight, baby, fight!!

“Sam, it’s me.” “Cas. Why?” “I wanted to be of service to the fight, and only Lucifer can beat her.” “You chose this? You have to fight, Cas. Eject him, now!” “I can’t. It’s taking all my strength to keep him from killing you. And besides, we need him.” “No, Cas, we don’t.”

I explained this show to my Eldest (twin) 10-year-old as, “A show where three man-shaped beings take turns being the one to do the stupid thing, not tell the others, and they spend the season trying to fix it before trading places.”

Funny enough, kid understood right away.

“We need him to save Dean.” “You can’t time travel.”

Duh! I have been screaming this at the screen since the beginning of the episode. Castiel lost a lot of stuff in the Fall. He still has his Grace, but not his wings. Not other things.

“Dean. That’s not Cas.”

Nope. But damn Collins is doing a masterful representation of Mark Pellegrino, here. I mean, the mannerisms, the expressions, the physicality—I don’t see a trace of Castiel in it.

And I don’t see someone doing an impersonation or something frivolous. No, this is an incredible ode to the other performer that you rarely see executed at such a precise level.

I’ve heard the same interviews we’ve all heard, where Collins asked Pellegrino for pointers and was told Lucifer always looked at people deciding whether to fuck them or kill them. It works.

Casifer’s a menace, but the Winchesters learned a thing or two from Castiel, including how to blast away an Angel. Fuck off, Casifer!

Oh, but look at Dean’s face. He’s gutted. Absolutely gutted. He lost Cas, again, and the mission was a bust. There’s no win, here. Just devastation.

“Cas.” “Yeah. Yeah, what do we do?” “What else? We hunt Lucifer, trap the bastard, and save Cas.” “Like I said, Lucifer may be in control, now, but Cas may not come back willingly. I mean, he chose it.” “No. No. Not possible.”

This whole scene kills me. Because Dean doesn’t think Cas would put himself in this position, that he would do something this monumentally unsound just to try to save them.

But he would, Dean. Again and again and again.

Dean looks off, away, thoughts reeling. He can’t wrap his mind around what happened, around the fact that everything he said to Cas since they got out of the cage was actually to Lucifer. And he’s so pissed at himself for not figuring it out.

Cas is his person. He is.

And Dean just lost him again. He can’t believe Cas would choose something like that again. Surely by now he knows how much he means to them? To Dean? Right!?

Like, Castiel can’t possibly see himself as disposable? As weak? As not enough?

But, he does. Castiel’s feelings of doubt and fear make him an easy target. He has no home, not really.

He wants to belong with the Winchesters, but too often feels more burden than help, especially after everything that happened with Rowena’s spell.

Dean has to wonder if he pushed Cas too fast to get back in the game, if there’s anything he could have done differently that would have kept him from making such a mad decision.

Castiel doesn’t know his worth. So much like Dean, in that. Neither knows how much they mean to the other. And now Dean is steadfastly avoiding a reality in his mind where he doesn’t get his Angel back.

S11E15 -

“He made a bad decision. We’ve been there.” “Yeah. You, me, now Cas.”

Honey, your boyfriend has made a lot more bad decisions than this one. But, yes, it is his turn this season to the be one without a braincell.

“Dean, we’ll get him back. We will. We just got to-” “Keep grinding. No matter how much it hurts, no matter how hard it gets, we gotta keep grinding.” “Right.” “And thats how we’re gonna win. And we’re gonna win. We’re gonna save Cas, we’re gonna ice the devil, and we’re gonna shank the Darkness. And anyone that gets in our way, well God help them.”

Priorities on display. But, also, I love the supportive brother-in-law.

Because Sam knows that Cas and Dean have something entirely different from what he and Cas have. He does love Cas as family. He trusts Cas.

But he can see that Dean and Cas are more. Even if Dean can’t see it, Sam does. He knows that Dean needs more reassurance about Cas than he does because that “profound bond” has always been there and always will be.

S11E17 -

“After everything we survived together, I watched the man I loved die. There’s no normal after that.”

Okay, is this a Sam/Dean thing or a Destiel thing? I don’t know, but Ackles’ performance here is crazy because he just disappears from the moment with her and he’s somewhere else entirely.

Yes, losing his brother is losing his world. But, she’s talking about a romantic relationship. So, that doesn’t quite play.

One of those things I wish I could ask someone about, because taking a stab at interpreting it feels too nebulous, even for me!

S11E18 -

“I will give you the horn if you help me exorcize Lucifer from Castiel’s vessel and then return him immediately to the cage.”

Fascinating fact—the subtitles use the English UK version of “exorcise” which made me pause, for a second, thinking I’d done something wrong. We’re good.

“After we exorcize Lucifer out of Cas and put him in a new vessel.” “What? Really?” “Yes, really.”

I love how Crowley just walks away from this situation. But, still interesting that Sam’s the one not seeing the idealistic view of this situation.

“We’re not gonna send Lucifer into battle inside Case. What if he doesn’t make it?” … “I’m guessing it can hold Lucifer." “It? It’s not an it, Sam, it’s Cas.” And Cas wanted to do this.” “Yeah, well there’s times I want to get slapped during sex by a girl wearing a Zoro mask. That don’t make it a good idea.” “Dean, this is exactly how we screw ourselves. We make the heart choice instead of the smart choice.”

Um… Sammy, are you trying not to say “love”? Because, it kinda feels like you’re trying really hard not to connect your brother and that word.

But that’s what this is—an act of Love. Castiel is trying to save those he loves doing what he thinks must be done. And Dean is trying to save Castiel before he loses him forever.

Yes, it’s the “heart choice” because Cas is Dean’s person.

Look, I don’t need to see them fuck or cuddle or even hold hands to know they’re an item. I remember the Aziracrow fandom going through it a few years back when Crowley (pronounced croh-lee) and Aziraphale finally locked lips.

Folks flocked to the inter webs protesting the show “making them gay”. Oh, honeys. The book was published in 1990 where not only were they referred to as “consenting”, a then-well-known slang for gay in the UK, but Aziraphale’s intro said people thought he was “gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide”.

And yet, the kiss was what made them “gay”.

The thing about queer love that I personally love is that its up to the people in it to decide what their relationship looks like. All you have to know is that it’s outside heteronormative rules, and there you go.

Some people like labels. Some don’t.

And whatever they are, Dean and Cas are each other’s person in this world, even if they’re not quite aware of it—Castiel because of his fear. Dean because of his baffling cluelessness.

“Oh, okay. Thank you, Dr Phil. Cas is family.” “Yes, and his choice deserves to be respected.” “Even if it kills him?”

And that’s the crux of it—Dean doesn’t want to lose Cas. Look, he’ll fight tooth and nail for his brother, and that’s understood. They’ve been codependent since childhood—especially Dean.

But Cas is something entirely different for Dean. He doesn’t have the words, yet, and maybe he never will. But it’s apparent to everyone involved that Dean’s more emotionally invested in Cas’ fate than the rest of them.

Crowley’s the one to go in to talk to Castiel.

“Wait, that was Dean I saw a minute ago, wasn’t it?” “Yes.” “And he wants me to expel Lucifer?” “Well, he may have a more objective view of the situation. Maybe I should.”

Cas is completely brainwashed and looks like one of those After School Specials that warned us about the perils of sitting too close to the television. I mean, there’s even bunny ears!

“Maybe Cas isn’t willing to play ball. I mean, you said it yourself—he wanted this. … Come on, Cas, what the hell?”

There’s no fight in there.

“Lucifer’s hold on him is too strong.”

Well, at least Crowley got to tell them that.

“Cas?”

It’s amazing how a single syllable—one word—can be so significant, yet so seemingly insignificant. Look how Amara reacts to Dean’s outburst—to the pleading in his eyes.

Because when Dean’s around her, he’s not always in control. But his love for Cas breaks through. It breaks through her usual allure, and she clocks that. Fast.

“Listen, um, I know I came down on the side of wanting Cas to deal with Amara, so…” “Well, thats what he wanted though, right? Besides, didn’t we say that we were gonna swear off getting in the way when one person makes a choice the other doesn’t agree with?” “Yeah. Um, yeah, we did say that.” “So…” “Okay, so that’s our policy.”

Dean’s masking. Because this still hurts like hell.

“Well, let’s go find that idiot and bring him home.”

Ah, there he is. There’s that optimism. I mean, yes, calling him names, but also determined to bring him home.

S11E19 -

“Dean, we'll find Cas, okay? He’s stronger than he looks.” “You know, we gambled with Cas and now Amara has him.” “For a reason. Which means he’s still alive.” … “The small fries, even an Angel like Cas, doesn’t even register. And if it meant hurting Lucifer, killing Cas would mean nothing to her.”

But it means everything to you, Dean. Because if you have Cas and Sam, you’re stable. You can keep going. But take either one of them away, and you’re a fucking wreck.

You may not fully realize why, yet, but you know you can’t lose Cas. Not again. Not now.

“So, we get back out there. We keep working. We keep moving. We’ll catch a break on Cas. We have to. It’s… it’s Karma.” “You know, Karma’s been kicking us in the teeth lately.”

Insane that Sam is the one trying to get Dean to stop reading books and get back to work. That’s how deep Dean’s love for Cas is.

A season earlier, it was everything Dean could do to keep moving. He was hurting bad with the Mark, but working was how he tried to cope.

With Cas in the wind, it’s not the same. It’s not an ache he can work through.

It’s a piercing, constant, targeted pain he can’t place and can’t ignore. Nothing soothes it, but trying to do something to help Cas makes it feel worth it. Worth the pain.

S11E20 -

“Whatever Amara’s doing to Lucifer.” “Yeah, beating on Cas in the meantime.”

Dean’s ready to take on Amara, but since he lost Cas, there’s always that “and”. He’s going to take down Amara and he’s going to save his Angel.

S11E21 -

In a move that is nothing short of insane someone wrote a storyline where Amara uses Castiel to connect with Dean. Like, I know I talk a lot about their cord of connection, but Amara is literally putting it in use!

I feel so justified in writing that all this time, now.

“Say nothing of the Vessel, your friend, Castiel.”

And the bitch shows him Castiel’s vessel, battered and broken. She’s using this to get her way. Nothing else has worked, right? So, try the Cas angle, I guess.

“We gotta find Lucifer before it’s too late.” “Too late?” … “She just showed up. But she’s showing me visions of Lucifer. And by Lucifer, I mean Cas, and he looks like crap. Like she’s really doing a number on him.”

Because that is what really concerns him. It’s not about Lucifer. It’s about stopping Amara and getting his friend back.

Why are these women so cringe, by the way? Amara’s come-ons to Dean are so gross, and I’m so glad he’s fighting back against her bullshit manipulation.

This isn’t love, Dean. If you don’t get to choose it, then it’s just not love. She’s a manipulative bitch with a tie to you because you unlocked a lock and now she thinks she has ownership of you. Fuck that.

“You’re right. I am drawn to you. And it bothers the hell out of me, cause I can’t control it.” “Then why fight it.”

Because that’s what “free will” is about, bitch. This entire show is about Dean Winchester and his little brother fighting against their destinies or whatever.

“Something stops you. Keeps you from having it all.”

Dean looks away. He’s fighting. And when she finds out Dean spoke with God—who sought him out—she reads it as betrayal. No, Darkness, that is not love. You can’t fathom love. You don’t understand free will.

Dean will never love you, much as you attempt to ensnare him.

S11E22 -

“Perhaps you’ll lend an ear to my very own Jiminy Cricket?”

And, of course, they can see the shift in Angels. And we see the shift in characters. Collins takes us from one to the other so damn beautifully.

Yes, I know this has zero to do with Destiel. But it’s beautiful and Ackles will get his due with the Michael arc, just wait!

“You know, every second that Ive spent subordinating myself to Lucifer, it’s been a torment. It’s destroying me. It’s burning through my vessel. But I would do it all over again because through me, he and God, they will defeat the Darkness. That’s my role in this fight. It’s God’s fight. You can play a part in that fight, too, if you join me.”

Cas was always good for a rousing speech. And, the reminder of the sacrifice—Jimmy Novak is a strong vessel, but every vessel is a temporary one when it comes to Lucifer.

“Oh, don’t worry. Your pet’s safety is my highest concern. Trust me, he’s onboard.”

Crowley’s face during this exchange is marvelous. He’s absolutely trying not to laugh aloud because everyone in this room is well aware of how Dean feels about Cas.

Now, some of them are saying it aloud, while others cough Sam cough are pretending not to notice. I mean, Sam seems like the kind of guy who wouldn’t out someone—even to themselves!

“First Cas is making Kamizaze side plans and now you?”

It’s never easy on Dean relying on the others, letting them do things their way. Doesn’t mean it’s gonna work out any better, but he is trying to let Sam take the lead, here.

S11E23 -

Dean puts a hand on Casifer’s shoulder to wake him. He starts to let it slide off, but when the being opens its eyes and looks upon Dean, it’s not Lucifer staring back out.

“Dean.” “Cas?”

Dean places the hand back on Cas’ shoulder, holding on this time.

“Hey, Is that you?!” “Lucifer is gone.”

Watch Dean here. Just… watch him. Take a moment away from worrying about waves hands the state of the bloody world and just watch the acting choice Ackles makes, here.

There’s such relief in knowing that Castiel is back that Lucifer is gone. In the midst of the horrors, there’s something to hold onto, again—Cas.

Because, when you’re in the thick of a shitty situation, where you can’t fix all the things in the world, you need little things—a favorite drink, a comfort television show, to hear the voice of someone you love.

Ackles puts such relief into that minute choice. His body shifts. His lips quirk into an almost-smile. You can feel a weight lifting off of him.

“Amara ripped him from my body.” “To where?”

There is no reason for that hand to still be on Cas’ shoulder Dean… we see you, Dean. And we love you for it.

“So that was a gun in your pocket.”

I’m sorry, but this is one time where Collins pulls focus. And it’s hilarious. I mean, he is out-of-focus and I’m still eating up his reaction to this because he isn’t looking at Rowena, he’s looking at Dean’s exasperated expression and wondering why he’s giving it.

Guess there’s still some slang and pop culture that’s out of Cas’ new understanding.

“Well, that was a complete and utter dog’s breakfast, wasn’t it?” “I didn’t know dogs had breakfast.” “Cas is back.”

Yeah, Dean. We noticed.

“Sometimes, me and Sam, we got so much going on that we forget about everyone else.”

Translation = I was taking you for granted… and I see that, now. And I don’t want you to feel that. I don’t want to do that anymore. I want to treat you better and appreciate you while you are here.

“You’re the best friend we’ve ever had. You’re our brother, Cas. I want you to know that.” “Thank you.”

Bro-zoned by the love of your life. Ouch, Cas, ouch. We all felt that one. Like the collective groan throughout the world was probably so loud it caused a tremble in the Earth’s crust.

Dean nearly lost Cas, and now he’s contemplative, and he’s saying things he needs to say. He needs Cas to know they are family. He doesn’t have a better word than that.

He still can’t wrap his mind around what they are. The closest thing Dean can reach for is family. But he totally bro-zones poor Cas. And if Cas isn’t completely sure he’s in love with Dean by now, he’s at least aware of it. It’s somewhere in there.

I mean, look at Cas’ face after Dean bro-zones him. He loves this poor bastard, and all he got for it is an invitation to the Family Reunion instead of an invitation to the Honeymoon Suite.

And Dean does love Cas in ways he’s never loved anyone else. Even if he won’t say it. Even if he doesn’t fully comprehend it. It’s there.

The thing about Dean is that he appreciates Cas more every time he loses him—whether to death or possession, it doesn’t matter. Whenever he thinks Cas might be gone for good, he recognizes how his feelings have shifted from the last time he lost him. They get stronger every time as his attachment to Cas grows.

He’s always late to the party, playing catch up to Cas' white-hot glow of love that deepens over the years. But it’s there, people. It’s there.

As Dean readies for his imminent demise, Cas goes in for a hug as flowers fall off the tree around them, blown by the wind. That is likely completely accidental, but it lends a beautiful ambiance to the moment.

Dean hugs Cas back, and while he says, “Okay, alright” his face says something else. He starts to get emotional. I mean, he just got Cas back again and now he’s the one to say goodbye.

“I could go with you.” “No, no no. No, I gotta do this alone.”

To the death. Cas was willing to go with Dean to the death so he wouldn’t have to do it, alone.

“Listen, if, when, when this works, Sam, he’s gonna be a mess. So look out for him, okay. Make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.” “Of course.” {Dean places a hand on his shoulder, again,} "Thank you for everything.”

Yup. “Of course” is Castiel’s “As You Wish”, his “I love you” when he can’t yet say it.

And Dean is entrusting Cas with the person most important to him—his little brother. He has spent his entire life watching out for that kid, and if he’s going to trust anyone to look after Sam, it’s going to be Cas.

“No chick flick moments, come on.” “Yeah, you love chick flicks.” “Yeah, you’re right. I do. Come here.”

Another one of those moments where I cringe at Dean’s upbringing and his heteronormative programming. Let Dean watch When Harry Met Sally, you cowards. With his best Angel. It’d be fucking adorable.

“He did it.” “He bloody did it.” “And Dean?”

Of course, it’s Cas. Of course he’s the one to say it. Sam can’t bring himself to say it. If the sun’s back, Dean’s gone, right? Right.

Or so they think. Dun, dun, DUN!!!

S12E01 -

“He’s a friend. Hey, Cas.” “Dean!”

They embrace, and it should be noted Dean was ready for that hug as much as Cas. I mean, he moves into that hug, even if Cas is the more ferocious in wrapping his arms around his person.

And it takes 0.5 seconds for Mom to clock that this is so much more than a “friend”. Look at that head tilt!

It’s okay, Mommy Winchester. Your boy found a good life partner.

Dean might lightly protest, but he lingers in that hug. He gives Cas a second to process and them both a chance to celebrate surviving the end… again.

“Dean. You're alive!?”

They pull apart, but don’t give each other much space. We are long past Dean worrying about personal space with Cas.

“This is Castiel.”

Castiel’s side eye makes me laugh every time. My 7-year-old daughter made me replay it over and over, because she thought it was funny, too. Because Castiel isn’t used to Dean Winchester introducing him by his full name.

I mean, this fully gives off “Introducing the boyfriend/girlfriend/theyfriend to Mom.” And, bonus, this is Dean’s mom.

“That’s an Angel?”

Cas as the muscle of the operation is a nice reminder of how capable he is when he has all his Grace.

He’s a badass, Angel warrior. And much as he thought he was super weak and super dispensable in Season 11, after all of that, he’s got new strength.

At the little roadside stand looking fun, Mary is a bit overwhelmed. And Cas is trying to be comforting. He sees the struggle in Mary, her overwhelm.

Oh, and those two coffees Castiel was carrying? He gave one to Mary, but the other was for Dean. Another act of service from our little Angel.

Season 12 is one of my favorites in terms of forward progression of the Destiel relationship. Castiel does go off the rails a bit at the end, but that’s kinda expected by now. One of them is gonna do it every season.

S12E02 -

“I understand. I’ll call you in the morning.” “Cas, hey.”

Cas is about to hang up and let Dean get his four hours of sleep, but Dean is actively seeking advice from Cas about his mother.

And, like, Dean, honey. Your Angel never had a mother, let alone one who came back from the dead after missing your entire childhood.

Like, Amara tried to do a nice thing for Dean, but it kinda fucks up the world even more. Kinda the theme of the show, right?

But I do like that Dean is asking Cas for advice and opening up to him… even if it goes nowhere.

“Powerfully warded. Okay, see, buddy, that was your headline, right there.” “Are we still discussing the same thing?” “Where are you?”

Aww, he confused the little Angel. I know that’s kinda their thing, but Cas is improving at the investigative stuff, and I do like that he gets that arc.

I mean, when he solves that case in S15 and goes back to the Winchesters after he and Dean divorced, it feels like he realized how much he could learn, how much he could overcome, how he is still useful, Angel power or none.

Also, how ridiculous are Cas and Dean trying to hold Mama Winchester back? And Cas even knows how stupid his request is, but goes along with it because Dean asks.

And the fact that Dean asks with a look makes me warm and fuzzy inside. I’ve always been a fan of their ability to talk without talking. That started early in the relationship, and I’m always giddy when it makes an appearance.

“I powered down all the wardings in this shack so your attack dog could come in.”

Dean looks to Cas on this and Cas is already looking back at him. I do like Cas getting to be a bit of the muscle for a while, Angel powers and all. Might as well use them sometimes, loves!

S12E03 -

“Castiel. What are you doing up?” “Oh, I’m always up. Angels don’t need sleep.”

Dean really needs to talk to his mom more about his Situationship. I mean, she has a lot to learn about him, but I think she’s already getting a good idea of the guy.

“Castiel, after you left heaven, when did it start to feel like, like you fit, like you belonged here?” “Well I’m still not sure I do. … Mary. You do belong here.” “Goodnight, Castiel.”

Okay, she likes her boy’s situationship. Very much.

“If it is him, I will call you. In the meantime, I think you’re needed here.”

Look at Cas trying to get them to address the Mom issue. That’s growth for Cas understanding humanity! He clearly can see the troubles going on within Mary and he’s trying to help Dean—who sucks at emotions—work through it.

When it comes to bullets and bloodshed, Dean knows the only way is through. When it comes to emotions, he bottles up, buttons down, and disappears into his head.

S12E04 -

“Bad news?” “Cas is chumming it up with Crowley. They’re hunting Lucifer together. That’s right. One’s an angel. One’s a demon, and apparently they solve crimes.”

Welp, at least he told you this time, right?! Seriously, Season 12 Dean and Cas are communicating, and I kinda love it.

S12E05 -

“Nazis. I hate these guys.”

I pumped my fists in the air at this line, y’all. It doesn’t have jack shit to do with Destiel, but I knew the moment I heard it I had to mention it. Fuck, yeah!

S12E06 -

“Are you a romcom chick?” “Are you?”

Hey, Sammy said he was! You can be more than one kind of person, Dean-o. You have such a binary, boxed-in way of looking at the world that you can’t even see it!

S12E07 -

“You consider switching up your duds here? Bit stiff for this town.” “He could be an agent or something.” “Yeah, maybe a third tier agent.” “At least I don’t look like a lumberjack.”

Ah, yes, the bitchy bickering of totally straight people.

I mean, Dean’s reaction is hilarious. Ackles is always good when it comes to a good reaction shot, but the ones where he and Collins are feeding off of one another particularly land.

In this case, Collins is the straight man and Ackles brings that laugh home. It’s a lovely rhythm, and I like when the Writers take advantage of it this way.

“Well, the only way you clear that crowd without drawing fire is if he’s otherwise engaged.” “Engaged in what, Cas? Killing you?” “Cas, you’ll last three minutes. Tops.” “Then I’ll buy you three minutes.” “Make it four. What? I help.”

Not much of a goodbye here, right? I guess Dean must’ve thought they were all going to be just fine, or he felt he and Cas were cool enough that if they went out this way, so be it.

Because, let’s be real, if Cas bit the dust, here, he’d be a mess.

“I wouldn’t expect you to understand. I was inside you. I know what a weak, duty-bound, pleasureless dullard you are.”

Hey, fuck you, buddy! It’s a running theme that the one thing all Angels can agree on is putting Castiel down. Any of y’all notice? All of them try to tell him how weak he is and dull he is.

Maybe they’re just jealous God keeps bringing Cas back and leaving the rest of them drooling on the floor of the Empty. I dunno.

“How you feeling?” “I’m not dead.”

Oh, Cas. Never change.

“Vince Vincente is dead.” “We never even hoped to save him.”

Wow, these two are in reversal from last season. When Casifer was roaming the Earth, it was Dean’s hope to vacate Lucifer before he faced Amara—to protect Cas. He was intent on saving Castiel.

This time, he’s on the “Yeah, we didn’t have a hope” side of the argument. Because that was Cas and he couldn’t risk losing him.

And, Dean, my dear, any clue why that might be? Nope. Not yet. Maybe after Cas dies a couple more times…

S12E8 -

Cas drops the coffee cups—the cups he grabbed for Dean and Sam. Another little act of service.

The boys rush in, and Dean is the first to reach Cas, grabbing onto his arm and back. Dean releases the hand on the arm, but keeps the one on his back, even as Cas tells them what’s going on. Dean doesn’t pull his arm away until Cas straightens.

“Alright. Stay here. We got this.”

Dean tries to get Cas to stay in the car, but as soon as he sees something’s going down, he’s on his feet and ready to fight.

“Cas, don’t.”

Cas is ready to take on the world for Dean Winchester. But, he stands down for the very same reason. There were times Dean begged him to stop, he didn’t, and the world and Heaven suffered.

So, while he’ll fight back when he thinks Dean’s being a dick, this time, he listens.

Oh! And love the detail that when everyone else ducks for cover, Cas just sorta stands there and goes, “huh”.

Also, the dude from Dear Santa!? I always thought he was a talented lad. Good for him landing a recurring role on a killer show!

“Who are you people?” “Well, dear. I’m a witch. He’s an Angel.” “And I’m the King of Hell.” “Oh, God.” “No, actually, he left.”

This little sequence of dialogue is amazing. It’s perfectly delivered, shot, edited, and still makes me giggle when I watch it, even though I’ve watched it a million times and committed it to memory.

Also, I love how Cas and Dean work wordlessly together, here. Cas gets the Bible and Dean sees where this is going, so he’s ready with the bin and the water. They’re really working well without words this season.

Oh, how far they’ve come!

S12E09 -

“You left them.” “Dean told me to go…”

I had to delete what I originally wrote because I realized I might have been channeling some of my own abandonment issues a bit too aggressively the first time around.

Let’s just say Mother Mary attacking Cas when she’s the one who left her kids because she missed the babies they once were didn’t sit well with me.

“If they needed help, why didn’t they call me?” “You were out.”

This.

“How do we let this happen, Castiel?”

We!? I’m sorry, we!? Castiel has been there with your boys, helping them. Working with them. Trying to work through all the shit the Universe throws at them. While she was off doing her own thing.

You are not in the same league, lady. So, stop taking your frustration at yourself and your own damn issues extend to Cas.

“I just wanted to say… I’m sorry.”

It’s a start. But you’re still on my shit list.

“They’ve only been gone-” “Six weeks, two days, and ten hours.”

See? Castiel knows it to the minute and you’re over here berating him when he’s been trying to find them, aching without Dean and worried for Sam.

Maybe it’s the first time she realizes just how much Cas cares because you can see the look in her eyes as this hits her.

“We’ll find them, Castiel. We will.”

Ah, yes, last season it was Sam comforting Dean about Cas. Now, it’s Mary comforting Cas about Dean.

And we’re supposed to ignore the parallels and pretend Destiel is a part of our imaginations. Yeah, right!

And then Castiel talks about the case he tried to work solo, the case he couldn’t solve, and how he ended up running away because he thought he wasn’t good enough to take care of it. Even when Mary offers to help, he answers, resigned:

“I’d only get in your way.”

He’s trying to “carry on” (thank you Kansas) for the boys. To do what they do. But he’s not quite there, yet, and it’s only making him feel worse.

“Cas.” “Dean?” “Hey, buddy, long time.” “What- what happened? Where are you?”

Look at the little Angel’s face. He’s so relieved to hear the voice of his love, again.

“Hey, buddy.”

Hugging is so natural by this point. But the way the camera hangs on Cas as he watches the Winchesters—mom and sons—reunite is telling.

He’s still on the outside here a bit, isn’t he? Much as he loves them. Much as he wants to protect them. He knows he’s not one of them.

“Cas, what have you done?”

Like any of y’all was gonna let one of the others take the fall. You’re Winchesters. You’re the “never give up” humans who keep Chuck entertained and baffle the rest of the supernatural world.

“You know this world, this sad, doomed little world, it needs you. It needs every last Winchester it can get and I will not let you die. I won’t let any of you die. And I won’t let you sacrifice themselves. You mean to much to me. To everything.”

Yup. This is the episode for Mary to realize just how much Castiel means to them. How much they mean to him. He’s an Angel who defied Heaven, who fell, who chose the Winchesters again and again and again.

But Mary knows nothing of that. She hasn’t witnessed it and she didn’t stick around long enough for her kid to learn it.

This episode shows her the bond her boys have with their feathered friend.

“Yeah, you made a deal. You made a stupid deal and I broke it. You’re welcome.”

The Winchesters are too damned shocked to berate him. Yes, Castiel has done some crazy, unhinged things for them in the past. But this is probably the craziest, at least to Dean and Sam.

As far as Mama Mary knows, this is an average Thursday.

S12E10 -

“You talk to Cas, yet?” “No.” “So, you’re just gonna keep walking past each other in the kitchen not saying a word?” “Maybe.”

Oh my gosh, these two are so married. And because make-up sex isn’t on the table at this point, they’re going to have to take the long way around to talking to one another, again.

“I’m not pissed that he… cares about us. You know. I’m grateful.”

Can’t say that Cas loves you, can you? I mean it. “Love” is a big and nebulous thing for Dean, no matter what shape or size it comes in.

If you’re not friend, family, or fuck-buddy, he doesn’t know what the hell to do with ya.

“My point is, Cas thought he was doing the right thing.” “I was doing the right thing.” “You sure about that?” “Yes.” “Well, I’m not so sure.” “And when the other shoe drops?” “I’ll deal with it.”

Seriously, they are so married and Sam’s trying to play intermediary to get his brother and brother-in-law to stop fighting.

Also, we’ve talked before about how Dean doesn’t mind being the one to die. He’d much rather it be him than anyone else he loves. And when those Cosmic Consequences drop, he doesn’t know which one of ’em it’ll drop on.

He has zero control, and he hates that position.

But soon enough, Cas’ll find the positions he likes.

I’m sorry! I’m so sorry. It just popped in my head, and then it tapped itself into the laptop and now it’s there. So, I can’t delete it on principle.

“Got a lead on Kelly?” “No, this is personal.” “Meaning what?”

I love that Dean wants to know. Like, he’s still fully invested in Cas even if he’s angry at him.

Wanna punch my boyfriend but pooky’s going out and not telling me why and I don’t like that, either.

Yeah, these two are totally married in S12.

“We’ll come with you.” “Both of you?” “Sure. Yeah, we could help. Gotta make sure you don’t do anything else stupid.”

Cas rolls his eyes, but Sam’s reaction makes me laugh the hardest. It’s like, “You were so close to getting through that without insulting your spouse, again”.

It’s Dean, Sam. Part of working relationships is working on them, communicating, sharing feelings and emotions.

He’s a walking advertisement for therapy and early intervention. You aren’t going to change that with a withering stare.

They ride in silence, which is weirding Sam out because the tension is thick. He tries the radio, but Dean doesn’t want it. He’d rather stew. And Cas stews with him.

Because this plays into one of the funniest and most consistent push/pulls between these two—Dean’s determination to sacrifice himself and Cas’ mission to protect him. And, yes, we know this goes both ways.

Kinda like Dean, am I right!?

ahem

“Alright, guys, you know what? This silent treatment thing, it’s silly. Its not gonna work. Whatever we’re walking into, we should, you know, probably have an actual plan.” “What do you want to know? “Oh, he speaks.” “Enough.”

This is so the couple in your life are arguing and you’re trying to get them to calm the fuck down. Also, Cas’ little glare at the back of Dean’s head is not helping the implied domestic squabble vibe of this scene. Just sayin’.

“Wow. This Benjamin seems like he’s pretty cool. Like he wouldn’t make any half-cocked, knee-jerk choices.” “Yeah, you know what I like about him is that he is sarcastic, but he’s thoughtful and appreciative, too.” “Now, what is that supposed to mean?”

Oh. My. Gosh. These two are totally married.

Dean has actually turned around in his seat to face Cas, completely ignoring the road. And neither of them is backing down. Poor Sam has to be the voice of reason.

And the camera swoop!? Normally we get the camera swoop between these two when Cas appears behind him or when Cas is there as backup. It’s often something that brings us comfort because of its familiarity.

This time, we’re breaking the convention because these two are in each other’s faces even if one’s in the backseat. They’re still connected by that blasted cord, even though right now they’d rather be annoyed with one another.

This isn’t brotherly, y’all. We have Sam and Dean to give us plenty of reference points for how Dean argues with a brother. This is something else and Dean doesn’t even see it.

They even added a horn sound to show that Dean’s driving is making others nervous outside the car. Bro, stop focusing on your argument with an Angel and keep your eyes on the road.

“She’s… his… friend.”

Sam, this is a wild choice. Like, “Lover” or something else more affectionate is right there, and if any Winchester would reach for it, it would be you. But you went with “Friend” which is technically what both of you call the Angel.

“Ishim said to come alone. He doesn’t like humans. If I plan to do anything else stupid, I’ll let you know.”

This is so bitchy. I love it. More, please.

Cas is looking past Dean so Dean knows without the shady of a doubt that this is for him. It’s catty and it’s direct, and I freakin’ love it. Dean needs a bit of this, sometimes.

“So, is he a hero? Is he a spanner in the works? I don’t know.”

Alright, you can fuck right off, Ishim.

“And you’re gonna storm in riiiiiiiiiight now.”

Dean is pacing outside the restaurant. He doesn’t like this one bit.

“Hey.” {Dean offers a bit of a shit-eating grin} “Dean.” “Feel a little left out over there.”

Cas doesn’t say anything to Sam, because he knows this isn’t Sam’s idea. Sam’s just along for the ride, on this one, as Dean determinedly tries to smash them all into a single booth, practically sitting in Castiel’s lap.

And before Dean’s even sat down, Ishim clocked it. Because Dean is zeroed in on Cas, and Castiel only chides Dean.

No doubt, since they know who the Winchesters are, they’ve heard legend of Destiel. I mean, almost every demonic or celestial being they come into contact with has some understanding of what’s going on, here, even if it’s not the complete picture.

“These are my friends. My friends who don’t listen very well.”

Dean almost looks proud with that little smirk and glance over. Jackass.

“You know, when I knew Castiel, he was a soldier. He was a warrior. He was an Angel’s Angel. Now, look how far he’s fallen.” “How about a little coffee with that sugar?”

Ishim’s been talking shit to Cas the whole time, but Dean doesn’t know that. All he knows is that he rolls up in here to see what’s going down and finds some dick Angel talking down to his Angel. It pisses him off.

And Ishim’s making mental note of it. He’s building the narrative in his head.

He sees in Cas and Dean him and Lily Sunder, for better or worse. But, he sees it—Castiel’s human weakness isn’t humanity. It’s Dean.

Only difference is that in this case, it’s love rather than obsession on Castiel’s part, and—though he won’t realize it until way too late—Dean has loved Cas for years.

No, I’m not going to get into what kind of love right now because it doesn’t matter. But Dean Winchester loves Cas in a way he loves nobody else. That’s just a fact.

And Ishim sees he’s pushed the right button. He glances from Dean to Cas and starts in on another round of insults.

“No wings. No home. Just a ratty old coat and a pair of poorly trained monkeys.” “Oh, well, you can go to Hell.” {Ishim smiles}

Ishim is poking at the pain points. He has his suspicions, but he wants confirmation. And he likes being a dick.

Dean glares at this fucker the whole time (until he mentions pie). Anything he was feeling toward Cas on the way here is melting away because Defender Dean is activated.

“Why do you let him talk to you like that? … I get that we need Super Dick there, but, I mean, come on.” “The Angels that I served with are being killed, so I will put up with Ishim, I will put up with everything else, and so will you. I have to go.”

This is so couple-coded. Like, “Honey, yes that asshole at the company Christmas party was sexist, but I need to make partner before I take him to HR”.

“You don’t owe them an explanation.” “Okay, hang on now. Uh, one eyed willy back there wasn’t trying to kill us. She was after you, so talk before she kicks in the damn door.”

It’s that “Choose Castiel, them or us” and it’s always really Dean. It’s about Dean. And Castiel will always choose Dean.

“They won’t understand.” “Cas, what’s going on?”

They even did the camera swoop from Ishim to Dean. It’s always going to be Dean. Give it a rest, Ishim.

“We’ll find her. Me and Sam.” “No, Dean.” “Cas, she doesn’t care about us, okay?”

Everything else from earlier has melted away. No, it’s not forgotten, but as long as there’s some magic-wielding, badass bitch with a blade gunning for his Angel, Dean’s going to put that shit to the side and charge into battle.

Or… a plea for mercy, as the case may be.

“Are you saying that those angels deserved to die? You think I deserve to die?” “No. No. That’s not what he’s saying.” “What is he saying?”

Have you ever had to be the translator for someone you love? Because while Sam cares about Cas, Dean knows him better than anyone. Anyone.

And so Dean sees Cas’ confusion and tries to help clarify, to calm him, to help him understand.

“We have to try.” “That’s right. And we’re not askin’.”

I mean, since you were roped into this, you’ve inserted yourself (I’m restraining here, friends, but it is not easy) everywhere Cas didn’t want you.

Damnit. It still came out wrong.

But, yeah, I’m not surprised that Dean “ask questions later” Winchester is going to help Cas whether he wants it or not.

Side Note: Hey, I found his middle name, at last!

“They’re a danger to us, case in point.” “Well my friendship with Sam and Dean has made me stronger.” “You can’t really believe that.”

Yes, he can, dipshit. Love and friendship and community always make us stronger. And that kind of strength isn’t something a bullish bastard with bad manners like you could ever understand.

“See, Cas is our family. So we can’t let you hurt him.”

Dean comes for Cas and immediately notes how worn and tired he is. He sits down on the couch next to Cas, but his positioning is already protective. He has a hand on the couch near Cas’s shoulder, and his positioning shields Cas.

“I think Ishim… I think he’s playing you.”

This is language Dean won’t use lightly. They used it before with the Angel who possessed Sam and Metatron fooling Cas. When they get played, it goes bad.

Dean helps Castiel to stand. Cas doesn’t have to ask. Dean’s there for him without him needing to ask when they’re actually on the same page.

“Who are you gonna believe? Your brother? Or some filthy ape who’s always talking down to you. Always mocking you?”

No, that would be you, feathers-for-brains.

“You know, Cas and I might not agree all the time, but at least he knows who his real friends are.”

I find the continued use of the two-shot of Cas and Dean here fascinating.

We’re racking focus between them based on what the coverage needs, but it lends a very “us vs you” quality to the scene, very clearly delineating that there’s no conflict for Cas—he didn’t need to be asked to choose this time.

It’s always going to be Dean.

“Who is he to question my choices? Who is he to question yours?” “Well, it seems that some of my choices may need to be questioned.

Growth. Because back in Season 6, Castiel was so convinced he was doing the right thing that even when Dean begged him to see otherwise, he couldn’t. Now, we see it’s an Angel problem.

And it’s another way where Castiel has stepped closer to Humanity. Not just in keeping company with the Winchesters, but in the way he thinks and the way he lives.

Castiel is presently neither Human or entirely Angel, but his own blend of two opposing forces made one through chemistry and devotion.

In short: Love changes us.

Not just romantic love, to be clear. All love changes us.

I still remember my first grade teacher. We recently reconnected on Facebook 34 years later (ugh, I’m old). I used to stay the night at her house and she taught me to make clay beads, paper mache face masks, to garden, to look at the stars and moon through a telescope, to hike in the woods.

I’ve thought back on those days over and over during the years when thinking of how to raise my own children—of what I wanted them to experience differently from how I grew up.

I had one beautiful year knowing that woman, and her love helped shape how I love my children all these years later.

Never discount the power of love.

“I used to envy you, Castiel. You believe that? You survived Hell. You were chosen by God. But now look at you. You’re just sad and pathetically weak.” “So, now, I’m gonna help you. I’m gonna cure you of your human weakness same way I cured my own—by cutting it out.”

Yup. Ishim thinks Cas loves Dean. I mean, we knew this. But if Dean’s listening in any manner to this conversation while he’s making that sigil on the wall, he knows it, too.

Dean’s ready with the sigil, and it gives the schmuck pause. But, he points out very quickly that poor Castiel is injured, and Dean might want to think twice about that particular move.

Ishim is a technician at isolating weakness. He’s now using Dean’s against him.

“You held him for long enough.”

This isn’t remotely a Destiel moment, but it’s one of my favorites of the episode. Lily thinks Ishim is going to finish her off, but the injured Castiel is able to stand long enough to kill a fellow Angel right in front of her.

She knows they were in the same group of Angels—that Castiel was part of the team that killed her daughter. But here he is, taking out the Angel trying to kill her.

There’s such awe in her eyes, as she sees that everything Dean and Sam said about Castiel is true. He doesn’t feel like other Angels. What he and the Winchesters has is real.

He falls to his knees as she still watches him, struggling to wrestle with her desire for revenge and adjusting to what she just witnessed.

These humans were willing to attack Ishim to protect her and Castiel. And then Castiel was willing to kill one of his own because he knew it was the right thing in the moment.

It’s hard when something rocks your reality. Dean will experience that in S15E18. But that’s a story for another time.

“He’s dead. Are you done?” “Revenge is all I’ve had for over 100 years. It’s all I am.” “Wrong answer. You’re done.”

OOoh, the parallels!! The parallels! Who else do we know who thinks that all they are is something dark and twisted?

“Dean.”

Dean says nothing, but acknowledges Cas. He doesn’t see the side-eye Cas casts him, but Lily does. She looks back to Cas.

“I’m sorry. I was wrong. And while its true that I didn’t know we were killing an innocent, ignorance is no excuse. I truly can’t imagine the depths of your loss.”

Castiel stands and walks within arm’s distance. He’s giving her plenty of space to stab him dead, right there.

It’s an important gesture—he’s offering himself up to pay for what he did. Yes, he didn’t know… but he still did the wrong thing. And he’s willing to pay the price.

“This was your child. I can’t imagine the pain. So if you leave here and you find that you can’t forgive me, I’ll be waiting. “Thank you.”

Lily has tears rolling down her cheeks. She said that every time she uses the Enochian magic, she burns more of her soul away. And right here, with his words, Castiel saves what’s left of this woman’s soul.

Because in him she sees what she’s never seen in an Angel before—remorse. Penance. The understanding that he was wrong and that being an Angel doesn’t absolve him from guilt or consequences.

And I’m thinking of S15E18—another time when Cas’ words heal what is broken. Yes, he’s a soldier. A warrior of God.

But the very things that make him different, the things that other Angels see as cracks and weaknesses—the things that make him more human—are the things that connect with us.

Love is what Ishim viewed as weakness. But love is what allowed Castiel to connect with Lily here, at the end. Love is what binds him to the Winchesters. And love will someday heal a profound brokenness in Dean.

At the start of this episode, Dean was annoyed with Cas—that his “caring” about them was going to get them in trouble. But, now they’ve gone through this whole episode where his ability to care is what saved the day.

Seriously, this is one of my favorite episodes not just because I’m a Destiel girly, but because of the way the themes, the characters, and their journeys are so effortlessly woven together.

“You earned it.” “This will do very little for me, but I appreciate the gesture.”

Dean pats his shoulder affectionately.

“What Ishim said, you’re not weak, Cas. You know that, right?” “I mean, obviously, you’ve changed, but it’s all been for the better, man.” “And you have been with us every step of this long, crazy thrill ride. And no matter how crazy it got, you never backed down.”

This reads as a lover checking in—making sure that his Angel knows how much he valued and doesn’t take the words of some asshole to heart.

“Cas, I don’t like how the whole Billie thing went down, okay? I know you thought you were doing the right thing. And I’m not mad. I’m worried. Because things like “cosmic consequences” have a habit of biting us in the ass.” “I know they do. But I don’t regret what I did, even if it costs me my life.”

They’re finally having a mature conversation about this. Because, let’s be honest, neither of them knows how to do this whatever it is.

Dean’s had some semi-long-term relationship stuff, yes. But not with someone who’s a part of their world and knows everything, I mean everything he’s done, good and bad. And Castiel’s an Angel shoe allegiances and alliances have determined whatever relationships he had.

Their relationship is something else that remains unnamed, to me. Like, I might comment on which labels seem to apply at a given moment in the story, but ultimately, I like that their relationship is theirs.

The Winchester parents were paired up by Cupid. God had a hand in ensuring their relationship. Destiel is the polar opposite of that—God didn’t see this one coming. And, frankly, I think it pisses him off.

From the moment he told Cas, “You’re not in this story” and Castiel said they were “Making it up as we go”, we knew that Dean and Cas are different. (Yes, Sam, too, but that’s not part of this particular point)

Castiel is a spanner in the works. And the Winchester boys are the most defiant of any universe—the ones who assert their free will time and time, again, despite Chuck’s best efforts.

Destiel doesn’t need labels to exist. Castiel loves Dean. Yes, we know it blossoms to a romantic love. And Dean loves Cas in a way he’s never loved another being. It just is.

But, I’m getting ahead of myself…

“So, what are you gonna do if you find Kelly and, uh, Lucifer Jr?” … “But, Cas, at the end of the day it’s a mom and her kid. I mean, do you think you’ll be able to…” “There’s a time when I wouldn’t have hesitated. But now, I don’t know.”

It’s not a great answer, but it’s an honest one. My Dad likes to say, “My favorite answer is ’I don’t know’ because then you can learn something new. You can figure it out, research, seek knowledge. It’s a perfectly valid answer".

“So, what are we gonna do?”

We. Us. Maybe everything isn’t forgiven, but they aren’t going to pass wordlessly in the halls, anymore. They’re aligned, again.

Everything in this episode showed that no matter how pissed they get at one another, Dean and Cas find their way back. They always find their way back.

S12E11 -

“Look, we can figure this out, alright? Don’t go calling Mom or Cas with this.”

Dean knows precisely who Sam would have on speed dial when something goes sideways. The Mom and the Boyfriend.

Like, seriously, Dean’s emergency contact list is short, but it’s intimate.

“And, our best friend’s an Angel!”

Really? A handprint is what reminded you of that!? And seeing it’s a bloody handprint makes me all the more heartbroken thinking about S15E18. Ugh, now I’m sad, again.

“My name is Dean Winchester. Sam is my brother. Uh, Mary Winchester is my mom. And Cast- Cas is my best friend.”

These are the things he’s holding onto tightest—the people who matter most to him in the world. Sam. Mom. Cas. He’s trying so hard to hold on.

And, as someone whose Mother-in-Law is suffering from dementia and getting worse and worse, this was a hard episode to watch. Because while Dean got happy without the burdens, my MIL is angrier and harsher, and I’m the one who she’s cast as the villain.

It’s not uncommon with dementia patients, and it’s not my first time with a family member to go through this. But for my husband, it’s devastating. I might tell him to skip this episode when he starts watching the show, again.

Oh! Matt watched the first three seasons back in the day during the first-run. I caught some over his shoulder, then, but it didn’t really stick. Since I’ve been talking his ear off, he’s considering diving back in. I think he’d enjoy it!

S12E12 -

“And how ’bout you, handsome?”

The Winchesters are a little taken aback. But, c’mon, y’all, the blue eyes? The disheveled adorableness? There are women who would kill for a night with that.

And as I write it, I’m suddenly hoping all these boys have good security systems in their homes in real life. Because, yeah, stalkers are a real thing and after watching my mom go through it, I can say yikes.

Admire from afar, my friends. Admire from afar.

And Castiel orders something, even though he doesn’t eat. More than likely, one of the others is going to take the food from him to polish off after eating theirs.

“Oh, dude, she is into you.” “Dean.” “No, this is good. We’ve been looking for teachable moments.”

Bro, last time you thought a chick was into him he ended up babysitting. You might not be the best at guiding Cas through the dating world.

Plus, Mom’s trying to subtly get you to stop because she long ago clocked the Angel’s puppy dog eyes for you.

Also, this table conversation is mad reminding me of my favorite family dinner scene in the history of cinema—from While You Were Sleeping. Like, this feels so real and lived-in and earned.

It’s delightful, and I don’t know if it’s writing or directing or both that’s responsible, but I adore it.

“You look like hammered crap.” “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

Dean’s trying to keep it light, because that’s how he gets through all the shit of life. But as soon as he glimpses Cas’ stomach, he sees how bad it is. The Angel isn’t healing, and it’s only getting worse.

“Dean, something’s wrong. I can’t heal myself. I think the, I think the demon’s spear was poisoned. I don’t- I think I’m dying.”

Cue Ackles on that damn lip quiver. Seriously, man, are you trying to kill us? It’s sad enough the Angel’s dying and you need to add to the body count?

Try as he might to stay strong for Cas, he can see how bad it is, and calls Sam over.

“If you’re an Angel, you just rot away. Sorry, Castiel.” “No, no. There’s a cure. There’s always a cure, and we will find it.”

Damn your eternal optimism, Dean.

“Hey, I was growing fond of the choir boy, too.” “Shut up, shut up.”

Dean isn’t ready to say goodbye to Cas. No way. No how.

“Cas, how bad is it?” {Cas shows his chest, covered in lines} “Crowley’s right. You should go.” “Cas, come on.” “No, you listen to me. You, thank you. Thank you. Knowing you, it, it’s been the best part of my life.”

Cas is casting his eyes around to everyone. This isn’t the intimate goodbye of S15E18. He isn’t trying to single out Dean, even though it’s there. He’s saying goodbye to his family.

“The things we’ve shared together, they have changed me.”

He’s looking at Dean for this one, and the editing choices confirm it—this is for Dean. “You changed me, Dean”.

Mary looks from Cas to Dean to see her boy’s reaction, and she sees him absorbing the words, trying not to feel the pain as Castiel struggles to breathe.

“You’re my family. I love you.”

Cas looks away on that last bit. He looks away, but the camera shows us Dean in this moment. Two episodes earlier, he said that Cas “cared” about them, but maybe Dean didn’t realize how much.

Maybe he didn’t realize the kind of love an Angel was capable of—but Castiel isn’t any old Angel.

“I love all of you.”

Cas looks to Sam first, but then to Dean. And the reverse shot here is Dean, looking down at a dying Cas, lip quivering. We’ll finally see Sam, again, after we see Dean. Moose is sad to lose the Angel, too.

But Sam will always know how much harder it hits Dean. Every time.

And all of these cuts between Cas and Dean are intentional, as are the shots of Mary looking from her son to this Angel, who means so much to him, who her actions injured.

Editing is an art. It’s a skill. There’s a reason there are awards for it because it’s storytelling.

Some folks think all the storytelling happens on the page or on the screen or both. And much as I love writers and wholeheartedly believe they still don’t get their due, everyone involved in a production is some sort of storyteller.

Lights tell a story. Where they are. Where they aren’t.

Costuming tells a story. What a character wears. Their state of mind. Their motivations and needs.

Set dressing tells a story. What matters to these characters and what doesn’t? What do they preserve and what do they let go?

So when I say Editing tells a story, you better believe I mean in. How a scene is cut together matters. Now, yes, the shots themselves and coverage are determined way ahead of time.

There may be storyboarding, discussions with the Director of Photography and working with the Director of a given episode to achieve their vision. Not to mention adjustments made on-the-fly once you’re actually setting up the scene.

But the Editors have a hand in this story, too. Some Directors lean over their Editors a lot, and some don’t. No clue which is the case in this episode. But if you look at all these shots during Castiel’s death speech, how they’re edited together says the things unsaid.

This is the “subtext” Destiel shippers caught onto long, long ago. So much of their story is told simply in how the scenes are lovingly stitched together.

We aren’t trying to read into something that isn’t there. We’re simply following the breadcrumbs to what appears to be a logical conclusion.

From Cas to Dean. Mary looking from Cas to Dean, not to Sam. Dean to Cas.

Yes, there are shots of Sam in there, but the shots that correspond with the dialogue are leading us somewhere. We’re simply following the breadcrumbs.

“Just please, please don’t make my last moments be spent watching you die. Just run. Save yourselves. And I will hold Ramiel off as long as I can.”

Oh, Cas. “I’ll hold them all off” with the archangels. “Run” with the Leviathans. Asking Dean to leave him alone as soon as he found the Angel in Purgatory. Even as he’s dying, he wants to save them.

Again, and again, and again. Protecting the Winchesters is his greatest mission.

“Cas, no.” “Yes. You need to keep fighting.” “We are fighting. We’re fighting for you, Cas.”

Aw, Sammy. Not gonna let your brother’s boyfriend die. Love the support!

“And like you said, you’re family. And we don’t leave family behind.”

To me, this is the moment Mary fully registers what Castiel means to her boy, even if Dean doesn’t see it himself, yet. Cas is next to her, trying not to cry.

Because this is love. Is it the romantic love he believes he’ll never receive from Dean? No. But there are many kinds of love, and Cas doesn’t need reciprocal love to love Dean. He simply… loves him.

But that “for love” Castiel talks about in S15E18? This is one of those times the Angel gets to witness Dean’s “for love” being “for Cas”. And that’s damn powerful.

Castiel starts to cry. Not the tears of agony or heartbreak, but of love. There have been many times when Dean’s love has shone through, that Cas has witnessed.

But I don’t think he’s ever felt it as acutely as he did here.

Look how Cas is locked on Dean in that moment. Remember, he’s an Angel. And he can see into Dean. This is a “heart choice” and it’s for Cas.

Once healed, the Winchester boys help Cas up, but once he’s on his feet, Cas only has eyes for Dean. And Dean looks back like he can’t believe it. While Sam releases Cas’ hand fairly quickly, Dean and Cas linger on one another’s as Dean pats Cas’ back.

Mary is about to fess up when Castiel asks what Ramiel meant about someone stealing from him, but Dean’s just happy to have Cas back, and his gaze and voice are so soft.

Mary clamps down—but not before she notices the intense staring going on between these two. She realizes what she almost did, what she almost took from her son. Indirectly, yes, but that was too damn high a price.

“Let’s go home.”

Home. Home is sometimes a place. Sometimes a person. But always a feeling.

“I almost lost one of my boys.”

This woman loves her son-in-law. Like, from moment one, she clocked something going on between Cas and Dean, and in only her second episode, Castiel was the one trying to offer her comfort, to tell her she belonged.

Cas and Dean have their falling outs, yes, but they find their way back. And this time, it was her actions and her secrets that nearly tore them apart. She doesn’t want to risk that, again. How could she look her son in the eye?

S12E14 -

“You were running an errand for the Brits. You kept it from us. Cas almost died.”

Always gonna be Dean to bring up his sweetheart.

“I am your mother. But I am not just a mom. And you are not a child.” “I never was.”

Damn, this hurts. The stories I could tell you… the things that happen when you childhood ends at 5, for Dean, or 6, for me.

“And this whole peacemaker schtick that you've been running, first with Cas, now with Mom. It’s getting old, man.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “You’re always playing the middle, Sam. For once, why don’t you pick a side?”

Y’know what, Dean, your brother has your back through so much bullshit. And while you’re all black-and-white, pick-a-side, Sam has a view that leans grey and mediated. He doesn’t have to always agree with you to have your back.

But, I mean, I hate your mother, so there’s that, I guess.

And, again, no hate against the actress. She does a lovely job. But I could chuck the character off the page in two seconds flat and show zero remorse. Good thing I’m not writing her arc, eh? It’d be two pages long and so boring.

We need the conflict, I get it. But, personally, I can still want to tell her off.

S12E15 -

Cas meets that other Angel who gets him to betray Dean… again.

“Look, you’ve got more field experience than the next thousand angels combined.” “I think you overestimate me.”

This Angel is poking at him. Sure, you’ve got the Winchesters, but why not work with us, too? Yeah, this place is nice, but don’t you miss home?

“He sound weird to you?”Oh, Dean, your Castiel Sense has come a long way. And the last time you ignored your Castiel Tingle (nope… we gotta find another word for that) he turned out to be Lucifer.

So, that means you’re going to follow up, right? Right?!

Yeah, no. This is Dean Winchester. Move on to the next Monster of the Week, Lady of the night, and Beer of the hour.

S12E16 -

“Killing monsters is what we do. Or maybe paling around with demons and witches, you’ve forgotten.” “Don’t tell me how to do my job.” “Well, then do it.” “You think it’s that simple, do you?” “I really do.” “Yeah, I used to think the same thing. Here’s a little tip. Things aren’t just black and white out here.”

Yes, Dean. Yes. Finally showing that frickin’ growth you’ve been working at.

And, like Cas with the Angels, trying to pass on that earned growth without all the scars to another Hunter. Well, British Man of Letters, but close enough.

S12E17 -

“Hey, you hear anything from Cas, yet?” “Mm. No. Still MIA.” “You think he’s alright?” “I don’t know.”

Stupid Cas worrying his stupid boyfriend. Call him, Cas! Geez Louise!

S12E18 -

“Cas, it’s me. I’ve been trying to get ahold of you for days. I don’t know what’s going on, but we got a line on Dagon, and we got our asses handed to us even with the colt. So, we could really use the backup. Just call me back.”

Dean’s getting worried. You can hear it in his voice. Who knows how many messages he’s left, how many times he’s texted to no avail.

Also, try praying. Even if he’s out of cell service, he’s not outta prayer coverage!

“So, no luck with Cas, huh?” “Yeah, still AWOL.” “Alright, so let’s find him.” “I’ve been trying, Sam. The GPS on his phone is turned off, and there’s nothing in the system about some weird guy in a trench coat getting arrested or turning up dead.” “Dean, it’s Cas. I mean, this isn’t the first time he’s dropped off the map, you know? And whatever’s happening, he’ll be fine. He always is.” “Yeah.”

Now Sam is in comfort mode, knowing Dean’s been looking for Dead Cas. That’s how worried Dean is—he thinks Cas is gone gone.

And this is the episode where the table gets its first scratches as the boys leave their marks. I love the moments where we remember they are brothers not just brothers who hunt and save the world and doom the world and try to save it, again.

Like, the little human moments like this are what reminds us of their love for one another and that they do have some good moments together. Not just, y’know, shared generational trauma.

S12E19 -

“Let me rephrase that for Sam. Where the hell have you been. And why have you been ignoring our phone calls?”

Ooh, boyfriend is pissed you’re screening his calls, babe.

“It’s a gift. You keep those.”

I’m sorry. Is that… a mixtape!? Dean made a mixtape of his favorite songs for his boyfriend? Like, yes, Castiel is using this as an excuse to enter the room and carry out his latest betrayal.

But, Dean, you gotta level with me. How many of your guy friends have you made a mixtape for?

I mean, I’m old enough I made mixtapes on my boombox from the Top 40 that played on the radio. I’d memorize the order and know when to push down “record” to get the ones I loved.

But I wasn’t gonna share them with my brother. This is boyfriend behavior, Mr. Winchester, and you have some explaining to do!

“Cas you can’t… With everything that’s going on, you can’t just go dark like that. We didn’t know what happened. We were worried. That’s not okay.”

Oh, this aches. Dean is actually leveling with Cas and being honest. And I know Cas wishes he could be honest, back, but he thinks he’s protecting Dean by not including him.

It’s one of those lessons Cas just doesn’t quite learn—Dean would rather be in deep shit with you than in the dark. He’d rather be facing down the monsters by your side than stumbling blind.

Stop cutting your boyfriend out of the equation just because you’re afraid he might get hurt!

“Dean, I just keep failing. Again and again… I just wanted - I needed to come back here with a win for you. For myself.” {Dean turns} “You think you’re the only one rolling snake eyes here?”

This reminds me of, “I look like good luck to you?” Same vibes. Maybe Cas used that as the template for this whole conversation.

“We will find a better way.” “You mean we?” [motions between them} “Yes, dumbass, we. You, me, and Sam, we’re just better together. So now that you’re back, let’s go Team Free Will”

I’m sorry, Dean, but where the hell is the personal space?

“It was under my pillow. … He came into my room and he played me.”

I’m sorry. Phrasing.

Also, what are you doing telling your boy-toy you sleep with the colt under your pillow? How did Cas even know about it? When did you tell him? What was the context of this conversation? And when did you start telling Cas things you don’t tell Sam?

Like, look, I’m not unhappy you’re breaking away from that super co-dependent relationship that is literally holding you both back while at the same time preserving you in ways that separating cannot. But, I wish we got to see it.

“How did you find us?” “While you were scamming me for the colt, Sam put a tracking device on your phone.”

Ah, yes. One of you has half a braincell, and it ain’t the one blinded by love.

“I wanted to keep you out of this. I was trying to keep you safe.” “You’re not our babysitter, Cas, okay? This is not your job. {Cas reaction} And when in our whole lives have we ever been safe?”

Honestly, I don’t think Dean’s ever been loved like this. Think about it. Nobody was there to protect Dean.

Dean was the protector—the one constantly watching out for Sammy. And, now, he tries hard to protect Cas, too. But he’s not used to someone protecting him because he feels like that’s his job.

But nobody knows more than Castiel that even the great Dean Winchester sometimes needs saving.

“Dagon is after Kelly. Your truck is broke down. Why don’t we get in the Impala, we’ll head back to the bunker and we’ll talk. We’ll figure it out.”

The shots tighten after he says this. Cas, then Dean. It’s always a battle of wills with these two. And in this moment, Cas relents.

"I betrayed my friends… my family.”

Note he talks about “two of my men” for those who call him “brother” but he no longer sees the Angels as his family. He sees Dean and Sam as his family.

“Well he hasn’t exactly had a banner year… everything’s blowing up in his face and he’s so desperate for a win right now he can’t even see straight.”

Why are they so alike!? Dean takes the Mark of Cain and straight up murders a buncha people, then Sam’s able to get the Mark off only to unleash the fucking Darkness, and now Castiel’s on the lamb with the President’s mistress and the spawn of Satan.

Yeah, fun club you’ve got, boys. I heartily decline membership.

Later, Castiel straight up smites Dagon. The moment the power flows from Kelly’s hand to Cas, Dean sees it. It’s Dean who immediately spies something is up with Cas.

“You’re hurt.”

Even when they’re at odds, he’s going to heal Dean. And it’s fascinating that he reaches for his arm, here, his and Dean’s hands barely touching as he does. His fingers wrap around Dean’s arm when they don’t need to.

“Whatever that thing did to you, we’re not gonna just let you walk away.”

Dean has seen Cas lobotomized. He’s seen him possessed. He’s seen Cas go through so many horrible things, and he wants to stop this before it gets bad. But, it’s too late.

With a touch, Sam’s out. And as he reaches for Dean, all the human can mutter is “Don’t” before he’s out and headed to the ground.

S12E20 -

“So, last night, that Super Mario power up crap? That wasn’t Cas. That freakin’ baby isn’t even born, yet, and it sock-puppeted him.”

This makes sense, based on every other time he’s seen Cas a little off. There was Godstiel, there was Naomi mind control, and there was Casifer. I mean, when it comes to being controlled by other beings, Cas has a reputation.

And it always goes badly.

“Look, this doesn’t make any sense to me, either, Dean, but if we wanna have some shot at finding Cas, then we have to, I don’t know. Uh, try and think like him?”

Look at poor Dean. He is worried. They survive Casifer and all that bullshit for Cas to up and disappear to then con him of the Colt, then he goes AWOL with Satan’s semen.

“How? I mean, seriously. Up until now if Cas messed up, if he did something wrong, but he thought it was for the right reasons, I got it. Right? But last night when I looked at him, I did not recognize the guy staring back at me.”

I mean, to be fair, Castiel didn’t look constipated, concerned, or confused, so I guess that would make him harder to recognize.

“Even if you can’t swing by, can you call me back? Just some stuff going down that’s got me spun out.”

He can’t shake the Cas stuff. He never could. And now he really wants his mom to be there for him to talk about his boy troubles.

Which is such a fun reversal from earlier in the season when he was gabbing with his Angel guy about his Mom troubles.

S12E22 -

“Y’know, it won’t long ago I thought we had it made. We saved the world. We got Cas back. We had Mom back. I mean, it wasn’t perfect, but, still, we had ’em. And now.” “Now they’re all gone.”

Ouch. I mean, just ouch. I mean, yeah, Mom stuff’s a bit worrisome, but Castiel is in the wind, not in the ground. You can still get him back.

“Yup. Big. Beautiful. And Dumb.”

Dean describing the weapon… or was he describing himself? Hmmm.

S12E23 -

“Dean.”

I just love how the little Angel only needs to acknowledge Dean. He sees the others, of course. This is his family. But it’s always gonna be Dean.

“We’ll work through our crap. We always do.”

This aches. It reminds me of Season 7 all over again when Cas assured Dean in episode 1 that he would redeem himself, that he would find a way. And then he dies.

This time, Dean says that he and Castiel will get through it because they always do. He knows that he and Cas will find their way back to one another, even if their paths diverge, sometimes. And this is important.

Because that cord between them is so strong now it feels almost impenetrable. That while their lives may take them away from one another at times, they are connected and that bond cannot be broken.

Dean has no idea how easily the right kind of blade can severe a cord completely when wielded in weighty hands. He goes into this situation knowing the odds, but thinking they’ll come out of it, fine.

And after they figure it out, they can talk it out. After they get through this latest horror, they can yell at each other and make amends.

All they need is time.

Oh, Dean, you think you have time. But time is running out, faster than you know.

“I have faith in us. You. Me. Mom. Cas. And Crowley. Sometimes.”

While, yes, the core of this show is the brothers—and it always has been—this is a moment when Dean is recounting those closest to them. And right behind his blood family is Cas.

Dean shouts when the knife pierces Cas and he sees his Angel die. He’s devastated when his Mom disappears into the closing portal with Lucifer. And while Sam has the wherewithal enough to go check on Kelly, Dean can’t tear himself from Castiel’s side.

He drops to his knees next to the body of his closest friend, his best friend, his almost something. And all those words he thought they’d have time to say die on his lips.

Something within him dies with them.

When he lost Cas to the Leviathans, he was shaky. When he lost him to Purgatory, he was devastated. When he watched him die and come back to life when he was human-ish, he nearly stroked out.

But this time, he’s shattered. Dean is shattered. The pieces are strewing everywhere and he can’t pull it back together.

Yes, part of this is his Mom. We’re not going to pretend that doesn’t hurt something awful. But it’s not all her. A lot of it is Cas.

Looking for Part V? It’s here! Thank you for reading!

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

I Am All In Rewatch - Episode 1x14 (Part 2)

And this one it required a little it required another layer where it was sort of like, now you have to show that you're interested, that you really want her, but you know, be a little bit secretive about it, so it's not so super obvious and it doesn't turn her off. And and uh, that's what I enjoyed about it. It It was that sort of banter, that going back and forth. I mean he would go from dismissive to kind of relaxed and accepting to a little bit of a smile, like just like that, and then move in for a kiss and get interrupted and and then take you know, I liked that hit of beer I took when she left. I was like, jeez, I need a drink. I almost kissed her. It's like almost and denied again. I mean that's the second or third time he's been denied by an annoying town member...The universe conspiring against me. [The chemistry is so palpable. It's just so cool. And are you feeling that when you're acting those scenes, almost like you get pumped up by it? What does that feel like when you're just ping ponging and having those scenes? What is that like?] It feels great? It's fun it yeah, it feels like a couple of tennis players playing a nice point, you know, just like hitting the ball, hitting shots, hitting shots. But I think it's because I think that relationship works. And this is this is what is dawning on me a little bit here as I watched these episodes, is that Lorelai's a very rebellious personality. She just is and that's why we love her because she's unpredictable and she's rebellious and you never know what's going to come out of her mouth, but you know it's going to be something funny, or it's going to be something a little bit of reverend and that kind of a thing. And she does it in the in the in the beginning the dinner scene again, which I thought was just brilliant hysterical...When she encounters me, she's encountering somebody who is even more rebellious and more irreverence, so it almost makes her look and feel lighter. it's a good it's a good chemistry because I'm a sort of a darker, heavier presence, but still rebellious and irreverent with a heart not like her. She's got a heart for everybody. I've got a heart for her and Rory, and that's pretty much about it, you know. So I'm very limited in how I can use my heart. So it's like, you know, the chemistry is that she's going to be able to focus her heart maybe on me in a romantic way, and that she will open up my heart so I can lighten up and love other people as well as her. So I think that's the the sort of yang yin and the yang of it. -Scott

Um, but you know, it was just more of the tension, the sexual tension that was playing out. It's kind of the dance that they do before the consummation end. And that she convinced him to do it, and that she right, that was pretty major and it's such an excuse for them to spend all this time together. Had he not felt a certain depth of feeling for her, there's no way he would have agreed to that. And she handled it, uh, with real finesse. She was very careful about it, even to the point where she said, well, we're not going to paint over that that order that your father scribbled down. We'll do it the right way. So yeah, he was just like, man, I just want to kiss her. I just want to kiss her. I just want to kiss her. I just want to kiss her. I mean, he wants to kiss us so bad it pisses him off. That's probably why he's cranky all the time. You know, it's like he just wants to plant one on her. Man, he wants her. It's getting pretty good. Yeah, so we saw, you know, we saw, we got to see other parts of the diner in some detail and even talk about some of the things that were up on the shelves that he was in no way, shape or form going to give in on and getting rid of them at her request. There was no way. It was like, I'm I'm gonna let you do this painting thing, but you know, you're not going to change me completely. So it was like pretty much telling her, we get into a relationship, I'm willing to sort of compromise with you, but not 100%. So he's his own man. He's his own guy, you know, and he's i think entering a relationship or potentially in any relationship, you've got to establish the ground rules that yeah, I'll meet you halfway, but that's it, you know. So he's a he's a hardass. He wants her, but he's a hard ass for sure. He's as strong as she is. He's as tough as she is. I think she yeah, I think she likes the fact that he's never going to change and that she can't change him very much, you know, that's the that's this, that's how I approached it. I wanted him to be a rock of Gibraltar. He's got to be the rock he can't break ever. -Scott

[bfdiredux]

In early BFDIA pre-hiatus, I remember Gelatin having the freeze syringe and anti-venom and stuff. Could you keep that part of his character? Somehow? Maybe by working it into his background? I mean he owns a restaurant and is some sort of chemist/inventor/just has things. He’s lowkey competent (even though he went out of business)

Gelatin !!!! He changed a lot throughout BFDI-- and I mean a lot. When we first see him in BFDIA, you're right!! He's competent and smart. But going into BFB, he kinda regresses? He becomes childish and he feels like another stock silly guy.

I love silly guys. But Gelatin deserves complexity. He places SECOND in BFB, I need to do something with his screentime. I also have a strong idea for him!!

Redux!Gelatin

Laidback, hardworking, nice, compassionate, creative, upbeat, and decently perceptive. He mostly knows when it's time to be serious and when it's time to goof off. There are a couple of moments though!! Everyone has them.

He is GREAT when he's not under stress.

He likes making people laugh. It's his way of helping and comforting others. This goes for himself, too.

Gelatin is a person who ignores his own wants and needs in order to help others. It's ironic, given how in-tune he is with people. (You'd expect his friendship with Firey to make him focus more on himself but it's quite the opposite!!)

Gelatin's creative energy has always gone to science. As a kid he loved getting science kits and messing around with them, even if he didn't really understand what was happening.

In middle school he had a biology phase, which shifted into biochemistry, and right as middle school ended, he found his true calling: chemistry.

He binged docuseries, read articles, and bought books. He got chemistry sets and found social groups online, as well as getting into an after school club!!

Gelatin waited a couple of years to enroll into a college. He wanted to make enough money to avoid going into debt. With a small job, help from his parents, and a good letter, he got in!!

However, in his second year, he had a bump-- his parents were retiring and he inherited their restaurant chain.

He does NOT want this but he can't let down his parents. They've done so much to support him. But... Putting a stressed student still trying to figure himself out in charge of a fairly successful business MAY NOT HAVE BEEN THE BEST IDEA.

The business is failing. Gelatin drops college to focus on that steakhouse instead. He's growing desperate--

BFDIA applications open.

Maybe it's a stupid idea but BFDI is a famous show and people were clamoring to get in. If he gets in, he can try to promote the steakhouse and stabilize the business.

He gets in!! Yippeeeeee!!!

Gelatin meets Firey right off the bat. Friendship established. Gelatin helps him let loose.

The second challenge is to make a cake for next episode's Cake at Stake. It was originally a stew but. Yoylecake. Guys, yoylecake!

Gelatin, Needle, Spongy, Ice Cube, and Book hitch a ride onto Puffball to get to Yoyleland. Puffball is in a rush to get to Yoyleland and this causes Spongy, Ice Cube, and Book to fall off.

Puffball leads Needle and Gelatin through Yoyleland, searching for ripe, healthy berries.

They find a leaf made of metal-- a side effect of eating yoyleberries. She follows them from a distance and Needle goes up to her, Gelatin follows.

It's Leafy!! Needle has history with her. She wants to be left alone and Gelatin comes up with a wonderful idea. He asks for Leafy's help with finding berry bushes. She says she knows a good patch but will only take them if they agree to leave her alone after. Gelatin promises to.

After gathering berries, Gelatin goes back to Leafy. Yes, he promised her he wouldn't, but also according to Needle she's been out here on her own for months. He asks her to come with them and Leafy declines. Gelatin can't imagine why. He tries again and again and eventually she pushes him.

Needle intervenes, fast as lightning, and takes the crew back to BFDIA's main playing field . Turns out they lost!!! Wow!

Gelatin won't be a main focus in the season. But when he does get it, he's got relationships I'm gonna flesh out!! As well as his financial struggles.

YEAH. Mid-season his steakhouse business falls flat on its face. He has to close it down, with existing establishments either being abandoned or repurposed.

Gelatin can't bring himself to go back to college after that and his elimination. He feels like he fails as a person. He feels like he failed his parents. Firey is there to comfort him.

Gelatin eventually meets Leafy again near the end of the season. They decide to stay in contact after.

Going into IDFB, Gelatin is PIVOTAL to Leafy and Firey's storyline. He's the one who gets them into interact. Firey is snippy and insists he doesn't know Leafy while Leafy makes it clear that they do have a history. I think this song does a good job giving off the vibe.

He and Leafy eventually drift away. Leafy's just spending time with others more now!!

BFB!

I don't have much for pre-split Gelatin. Still him focusing on others and helping with contests. I swear he'll get fleshed out here.

He stays in BFB during Two's arrival. His oldest friends are there and he thinks the added prize, while silly, is FUN to mess with.

POST-SPLIT GELATIN! Now the characters have time to breathe.

Gelatin gets to know the Have Cots.

Teardrop is wildly competitive and effective at her work.

Balloony, while he didn't last long, was VERY MUCH SO the Team Dad. He was the moral support's moral support.

LEAFY'S ON THE TEAM!! Gelatin is ecstatic to hang out with her again and gets to hear more about her past with Firey.

Bubble and Ruby are a strong unit together. Gelatin knows that they went through something with their old alliance pre-split but he hasn't pried.

Lollipop is fun. She's confident and witty and makes for a great teammate.

BFB 22!! Donut's diary has gone missing and there's a court case. Leafy calls Firey up for questioning and Firey sputters out a whole story about Leafy stealing the diary. Leafy takes Firey outside to talk.

During that time, Gelatin realizes he and Lollipop are the only new folks left on the Have Cots, with everyone else being season 1 veterans. He invited her to an alliance. Say hello to the Newbie Alliance!!

TD's comic where Gelatin dies horribly? It catches Gelatin off-guard but he's able to work things out pretty quickly with Teardrop!! And then Lollipop invites her to the alliance.

They are the type of friends to flirt with each other. Lollipop always initiates it with Gelatin and Gelatin is shit at it. Post-BFB they will be asked if they're together and they're going to stare DIRECTLY at the asker and go "You thought we were romantic??" High chance one of them is gay or biromantic leaning same-sex. I have had several friends like this and it is the funniest thing ever

When Lollipop is eliminated, she gives some of her pigment to Gelatin! He doesn't keep it just because it's cool, he keeps it because Lollipop is his friend.

Gelatin isn't that close with Flower when BFB first starts but going into the end of post-split, the two of them spend MUCH more time together as the finalists.

Four's motivation has been running dry and X refuses to leave his side... And someone shows up to take advantage of that.

Announcer!! He's here to host while Four and X are out of commission.

And he runs the budget into the dirt.

Flower and Gelatin work together to gather donations to raise the budget by posting online!! Fun contests and exclusive finalist interviews-- and when Gelatin gets interviewed he feels a bit awkward.

For as long as he can remember, he's been focusing on others. Taking over his parents' business as a young adult, being there for his friends, doing what Lollipop and TD want..

He's been neglecting his own wants and needs. He was going to go to college. He was going to study chemistry and become a scientist. He wants to win. While he wouldn't change anything that's happened to him, he does want a chance to do things for himself.

During the finale, season 1 contestants get to share their grievances as Announcer tries to deny his actions and Gelatin cheers them on.

Flower wins the BFDI and BFB. This crushes Gelatin some.

Everyone is setting up a big party to celebrate the end of the season!!

She disappears for a while and comes back to Gelatin with the BFB.

"Hi, Gelatin."

"Hi, Flower!"

"I think this is yours." Flower slides the BFB over to Gelatin.

"No?" Gelatin chuckles. "You won the season, you goof!"

"Yes, I won the season. Though I think you deserve this, you clearly want it."

"Wow, I- I don't know what to say, Flower.. I.. Thank you."

They hug it out. Win!!

As the episode ends, Gelatin and Flower see Firey and Leafy off, where they are going to find their own island!

After the season, Gelatin goes back to college. It's a heartfelt goodbye!!

He returns with his Bachelor's degree in chemistry a couple of years later. Gelatin has made sure to keep up with his friends, though!! Online calls exist :]

[corvus-frugilegus]

hello i need "the throuple that lost its wings" expediently plz plz plz

okay so. Nazri/Neve/Lucanis was nearly a thing, there's so much chemistry between them and for the early game there's this really delicate thing growing between the three of them? they feel like the really equal triangle in the way they're all dancing aroind each other. THEN A DRAGON FUCKS IT ALL UP and they never find their footing as a triad again? at least not over the event of veilguard. because of their collective issues they just never get back to that equal place? the triangle is always lopsided and there's always complicated feelings about it. i want to get back to this real bad actually.

I thiiiink @lucaniseyebrowlicker you asked about this one too!

He finds Rook in the kitchen. He can see the tension coiled in their shoulders, their neck, their stomach, their heart. They don't even look up from the fire- still half in their armour, the emblem of the white wyrm ripped from their cloak and left splayed on the table. They're twisted in the chair, contorted so as to look away from it without turning their back on it.

He can hear that Shadow Dragon's voice clear in his mind, "[find the tarquin line that hurt your feelings later]".

They saved Treviso, his home, his people, but at great cost to their own. To Neve's.

Something fractured between the three of them when Rook had to choose. He felt it when he saw then approach in Treviso- the overwhelming wave of relief that they'd come. That they'd chosen Treviso. And selfishly... that they'd shown up for him. Maybe even chosen him. Yet in that same moment underneath the relief of it all the cool weight of guilt settled somewhere deep in his chest. [note to self there's a good spite line in inner demons, guilt about Neve?? look that up and adjust this bit a bit.]

He could see the way Neve's anger cut Rook. In a way it cut him too- like an arrow grazing him on it's way to lodge itself in Rook's chest. Rook chose him. They didn't Choose Neve. He was glad for it. He feels terrible for it. The ease and trust that had been growing between the three of them had been twisted in a matter of minutes. Whatever he thought had been budding between Rook and Neve before, would it still be there now? Or would he...

---

Neve folded into Rook's shoulder, a fit of uncharacteristic giggles spilling from the two of them as they stumbled through the steps of a dance in front of the fire.

It was late. Past midnight by Lucanis's count. The three of them had fallen into finding each other in the kitchen at all hours- No one discussed the why of it, preferring instead to skirt around what they knew was lurking below the surface. Tonight, over a bit more wine than usual, the two tevinter mages, his unlikely rescuers, had been caught up in reminiscence about their shared home. The love they both share for Tevinter, for Minrathous, is much like the love he has for Treviso.

"Ohhh you're trouble Mercar" Neve teases, pulling away from her short lived dance partner. They had been arguing about Tevinter night life- Neve adamant that Dock Town had some of the best spots for a night out. Rook vehemently disagreed- Nowhere does it like Lowtown Ventus at weeks end. Lucanis had retreated to the stovetop just before the two started twirling each other around to half remembered Minrathous bar songs- preferring instead the more predicatable task of preparing snacks.

"I don't know that I'm trouble" Rook retorts, "but I do have a knack for getting into it."

Neve laughs. Lucanis finds the two of them more charming than he'd expected. Finds himself more at ease around the two mages than he'd expected. He envies how easily the two of them seem to have bonded. If he interrogates that thought - which he does late at night by himself, against his better judgement - he envies what he see's growing between them. He's not sure if he's jealous of Neve, or of Rook, or simply of the ease in which they seem able to tease and flirt. He tries his best not to think on the warmth he feels when either of them turn their charms towards him.

He does not know that for Rook and Neve, this dance of flirtation is a way of keeping the real parts of themselves at arms length while probing the others reaction.

He does not know that, just like him, the second it becomes real Rook's instinct will be to run and hide. That Neve will try her best to seem unaffected.

None of them have yet realized that their shared laughter is warming the kitchen as much as the fire.

"Okay but the BEST place to end a night of drinking is this little hole in the wall in Midtown Vyrantium." Rook declares this very confidently. "The Lamb Manti-"

"The ones with the Garlic Sauce?" Lucanis interrupts. "From the place behind tailor's shop on the market square?"

---

In the time he's been in the kitchen Rook has barely moved, let alone said a word. Lucanis has grown used to spending time with them in relative silence over the last months. Quiet company, a dynamic that has become comfortable between them.

Today the silence between them feels heavy. There aren't words to bridge the chasm of guilt Rook seems trapped in the middle of.

What finally rouses them from their near catatonic state is the sound of a plate being gently set infront of them and the smell of a strong Antivan coffee. Slowly, they twist back around and set their eyes on the plate in front of them.

Lucanis Dellamorte is going to be the death of them they think.

Eight perfectly folded Lamb Manti with a small bowl of garlic sauce sit on the plate before them, beside a mug of hot coffee.

He didn't say a word before retreating back to the counter tops, making himself busy tidying the small space.

Rook's voice is brittle, but the soft smile pulling at the edges of their weary face cuts straight through the weight he hadn't realized was in his chest. "Thanks Lucanis."

"It's nothing."

It's not nearly enough to make up for what they've lost. Not nearly enough to fill the void of Neve's absence. But it's something.