#have I ever mentioned I love myself some doomed romance? (* ´ ▽ ` *) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lady-october · 10 months ago

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Pairing : Oli Sykes x Female Assistant Genre : Romance, Smut (18+ Only) Previous Chapters : 1-9 on Archive of Our Own

Story Content : 18+, Smut, Drama, Choking, Power dynamics, Romance, Dom/Sub, Sadism/Masochism, Mentions of addiction & self harm, Degradation, Praise kink, Exhibitionism, Breath play, Dirty talk.

Summary :

“Don’t you see what a dangerous game you’re playing? Why did you have to look so fucking delicious tonight, I couldn’t stop undressing you in my mind, thinking of all the twisted things I want to do to you.” She had only worked on the touring team for three weeks, but her mind had been hijacked by dirty thoughts of a man she barely even talked to. Sure, he was very attractive, but were there other reasons she was so uncontrollably drawn to him? This is a filthy story of pain, self discovery, and love.

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Chapter 10: Tear me to pieces, sell me for parts

Chapter title is lyrics from "Doomed"

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The soft whirring of a vacuum could be heard in the distance as I came to. I pried my eyes open to see sun beams painting the walls in shades of warm yellow through the gaps of the hotel room curtains.

Then a couple of things happened in quick succession.

I noticed the warm body nestled into me from behind, and the arm so lovingly wrapped around me, which I was holding onto just as affectionately. Aside from my mouth feeling like I’d had a serving of sand for breakfast, I couldn’t have been more comfortable.

As I was laying there, trying to simply relax for once, the memories from last night began to swim back to me; Oli’s attempt at making me jealous, me actually becoming jealous – which was a whole other can of worms that required dealing with at some point – and of course, the sex.

Unease settled in as I knew I’d have to confess the choking went too far, although this morning didn’t seem like the right time.

In the back of my mind I knew that no time would probably ever feel like the right time, but I pushed that aside.

So much for relaxing.

As my mind was roaming, I had mindlessly let my eyes roam as well, and after a couple of seconds it became obvious that I wasn’t currently in Oli’s room, but my own. I frowned, realising I couldn’t remember how we ended up here. It also occurred to me that because I was already in my room, I didn’t even have the option to slip out unnoticed this morning.

I felt the seeds of panic begin to grow in my gut, but I firmly decided to push them aside with the rest of things I didn’t want to think about right now.

Which was becoming a frighteningly long list of things.

Before I chickened out, knowing I couldn’t keep ignoring him forever, I made the rash decision to let my hand caress his arm, gently testing if he was awake. As my fingers traced the patterns on his skin, my gaze followed, causing me to look down and make yet another discovery.

Am I naked?

I didn’t get a single moment to sit with that thought as he immediately spoke up from behind.

“Morning, love.”

His tone was low and relaxed, yet alert; he must have been awake already.

Crap, what now?

Wishing I’d taken just a second to figure out how to behave this morning before seeing if he was awake, especially considering I couldn’t remember big parts of the night, I did the only thing that came to mind; make smalltalk.

“How did you sleep?” My dry throat strained to get the words out.

“Some nightmares, hope I didn’t wake you.”

As he spoke he removed the arm I had been caressing in order to push the hair away from my shoulder and gently kiss the sore skin there. The emotional discomfort I was experiencing faded, instead being replaced with embers of desire.

“No, I was out cold.” I answered with a grin.

I let myself roll onto my back to face him, and I was met by large hazel eyes, framed by the remnants of eyeliner from the concert, looking down at me. His hair was unusually tousled, his face more stubbly than most days, yet all of this just made him look even more beautiful in the warm glow of the morning light.

As he was scanning my face his relaxed expression shifted to contain hints of sadness.

“Really bad nightmares then?” I asked vaguely, not wanting to pry in case it was a sore subject for him.

I placed my hands on his chest to feel him, to comfort him, as he broke eye contact and let an awkward smile appear on his features. I was about to speak up, tell him that it’s alright, we don’t need to talk about it, when everything started to seem just that tad bit too familiar.

My hands on his chest, me looking up at him, his nervous expression…

Before I knew it the memories hit me with the force of a tsunami, and I was immediately transported back to the crisp night air, leaning against the outer wall of the hotel. His words swimming around my head in one big jumbled mess; his reasons for almost relapsing our first night together, how negatively he views himself, and of course – how he feels about me.

‘I think I’m falling for you, Alice.’

I swallowed, noticing my nails digging into his chest.

Whatever seeds of panic I had managed to push to the side was back, and multiplying at an alarming rate.

He looked down at my hands, then back at me with a deep frown. My panic must have been written all over my face cause he started to pull away.

“I think it’s time for me to get going.” He said coldly, before he sat up and bent over to collect his trousers, slipping into them. I found myself grabbing wordlessly for him as he was getting ready to leave, but to no avail. He was clearly in a rush as he didn’t even bother to slip his shirt on, instead flinging it over his shoulder, taking long strides towards the door.

More panic was building in my chest; a mixture of the memories of his words, but also because him leaving now felt inexplicitly horrible, and I couldn’t just let it happen.

So I shot up into a sitting position and yelled after him, “Wait!”

He stopped, looking back at me. There was so much hurt in his eyes, causing an ache in my own chest merely from the sight of him.

But at least he’d stopped.

I scrambled to think of anything to say, or do.

Then it hit me.

Feeling awkward about being completely naked considering the current situation, I still decided to get out of bed and walk up to him. He watched me with intense curiosity during every step, only adding to how extremely, painfully aware I was of the fact that I wasn’t wearing anything at all.

Pushing through, I positioned myself in front of him, and demanded what I wanted.

“Give me your phone.” I said boldly, trying to forget about my state.

His head tilted to the side, faint signs of the same playfulness from last night flickered across his features, “Why?”

“Cause I said so.” I retorted, a lot more shyly this time.

He squinted at me for a moment, then his gaze dropped to my body – just for a second – but it was enough to make me squirm. Thankfully he didn’t let me suffer for long, as he finally reached into his pocket to retrieve his phone, and handed it to me.

I took it off of him in a hurry, only to realise it was locked.

Of course it was.

When I looked back up at him he was fighting a smile, obviously trying to make this simple task as difficult for me as possible .

Sighing, I handed it back to him, “Unlock it.” I said, hoping he’d simply do it. I tried to muster up the same boldness from earlier, but it fell short.

He inclined his head slightly, causing his eyes to darken as he asked, “Demanding, aren’t we?”

He didn’t break eye contact as he took the phone back. I thought I’d won, but alas.

“Say please.”

While laid back and teasing, the words were an order, making my attempts at boldness sound pathetic.

I looked up at him, pleading as I spoke, moreso to end my suffering at this point than to get my way.

“Please.” I said softly.

He held my gaze for a moment longer, and I could tell something in him relaxed and gave in, then he proceeded to unlock the phone and place it in the palm of my hand.

Wasting no time, I went straight to his contacts, adding myself in a hurry and sent myself a single period – both to double check that I’d key’d everything in correctly, but also so I’d have his number saved. I heard my phone vibrate from across the room, then I left the chat open and handed the phone back to him.

“At least this way we can chat whenever we want.” I said quietly, folding my arms – both to cover myself out of discomfort, but also because I was feeling unsure about my gesture. My hope was that it showed I cared on some level, despite being overwhelmed by his confessions from last night.

The phone disappeared into his pocket, “Alright, thanks.” He said with a smile, but I couldn’t tell if it was forced or not.

In fact, he was significantly harder to read than usual.

I nervously smiled back at him before he continued towards the exit.

Right before he left he shot me one last sly glance.

“Clothes don’t do you justice, love.” He said with a much more genuine smile, causing my nerves to ease, and my own smile to soften.

Sadly my gesture hadn’t been as effective as I hoped.

After barely having enough time to shower and get ready, it was time to checkout and get going. When everyone had gotten on the bus and we were ready to set off, I couldn’t help but feel disappointment over the fact that Oli had positioned himself as far away from me as possible, and avoided eye contact while doing so.

I stared at the open chat on my phone as Liam pulled out of the hotel parking lot, wondering if I should message him, realising I didn’t know what to say.

Do I ask if he’s okay? No, I knew he wasn’t. Also if he wanted to talk about it he would have done that this morning instead of leaving in a hurry.

I could send him a stupid meme, or some of the hilarious fan art I’d been collecting over the past weeks, one of which depicting the band members as different dairy products – somehow turned sexual.

Yet something so light-hearted felt inappropriate, almost as if I was overlooking his pain and trying to sweep it under the rug.

Frowning, I put my phone away for now, feeling defeated.

Hours passed and the city scenery turned into desert landscapes. Oli hadn’t said a word to me, either via text or in person, and I was growing increasingly impatient. I had managed to position myself across from him again after many attempts at offering the guys snacks and drinks hoping he would speak up, but to no avail. I had even attempted to join in on the conversations, something I very rarely did unless directly spoken to, but only the other band members had responded to me.

When everything else failed I instead tried to stare at him less, attempting to stay sane, knowing looking at him only caused me to spiral further, but muscle memory took over and I found myself stealing the usual glances.

And of course he looked as hot as ever.

While still casual, he appeared slightly more dressed up than the first day on the bus. A grey sleeveless shirt adorned with some satanic looking symbol, paired with ripped black jeans. But it was his hair that made him look a bit more put together, as whatever product he’d put in it caused his curls to cascade more controlled and defined as they framed his face.

Meanwhile I felt like a slob. Bare face, more tour merch, and some simple shorts. Knowing that comfort and practicality had to come first as we were spending at least two nights on the bus.

I was staring with contempt at the stupid, lonesome period I sent from Oli’s phone, when Liam spoke up from the driver's seat, “There’s a diner up ahead we can stop at, they have some incredible pancakes if you guys want to stop for a while.”

After having been cramped up on the bus all day, only having had random snacks, everyone agreed they could use a hot meal and stretch their legs.

Or so I thought, but as we started filtering out of the bus I heard Oli speak up behind me. I turned around to see him holding Lee's arm, having stopped him to talk, “Bring me back some pancakes, will ya? Slept absolutely horrid, think I’ll have a quick nap.”

“Sure mate.” Lee responded casually.

I saw a chance to get him alone, and I pounced, “I’ll get them for you!” I said in a hurry, only just catching Oli’s look of disapproval before turning on my heels and evacuating the vehicle.

I tried not to be alarmed over the fact that I had made yet another rash decision, but adrenaline was hitting me as we were walking into the diner, causing my mind to run in circles, filling it with every thought imaginable, which was about as useful as having no thoughts at all.

A bell chimed as we stepped through the doors. It was a charming little place, everything painted in bright retro colours, and smelled like heaven. Everyone ordered too much food for any one person, and I got myself and Oli some coffee and a container of pancakes each.

As I was about to leave with my order, hoping no one would notice the fact that Oli hadn’t wanted his order until we were all heading back, Liam stopped me.

“I’ll keep the lads here as long as I can, which I’m sure won't be hard since we’ve been on that bus all day – and isn’t this just the most adorable place?” He asked, moreso as a comment than a question, because he continued before I could get a word in, “but will you please use at least some of the time to actually talk to him?”

I squinted at him, realising Liam once again knew entirely too much, “Don’t worry, I will.”

And for once I actually intended to talk to him. The problem was I didn’t have a single clue what to say, my mind having gone uncomfortably and unfortunately blank. All I was certain of was that I wanted us to move past this as quickly and pain-free as possible.

A confusing concoction of fear was stirring inside me; a mixture of so many emotions I didn't know where to start untangling them, so I took one last deep breath, as if attempting to exhale the fears, before stepping back onto the bus.

Unsurprisingly he had not gone for a nap, instead he was sitting on the sofa, his attention entirely on his phone. All the lights were off in the bus, but the sun was still high in the sky, shining brightly through the windscreen causing the light to bounce off of every surface, painting the interior in similar warm shades as the hotel room this morning.

Before taking a seat I decided to press the button to both close and lock the bus door – just in case, then I placed his coffee and pancakes on the little table next to the sofa, and sat down across from him.

Wordlessly, he opened the pancake container, grabbed a pancake with his bare hands and took a large bite, his attention immediately returning to his phone, making it very apparent he had no intention of speaking to me.

Bastard.

So I took a sip of my coffee, and purely out of frustration, I gave in and broke the unbearable silence.

“Stop ignoring me.”

Direct and to the point, but maybe with a bit more attitude than I had wanted.

“I’m not.” He responded casually, taking another bite.

Annoyed with his response, I retorted with evidence proving the contrary, “You haven’t messaged me all day.”

“Neither have you.”

I felt the pressure of frustration building inside me, threatening to reach some type of boiling point. Realising that I didn’t have the words in me to correct this, I decided to try action.

I got up from my chair and walked up to him, stopping right by his feet.

Angrily, he glared up at me and threw the remainder of the pancake back into the container.

Knowing this might be a terrible idea, out of desperation, I decided to go through with my plan regardless of his anger.

So I began straddling him.

And to my surprise, he let me.

While he never stopped glaring at me, I could thankfully feel his hand slide up my thigh, disappearing under the fabric of my shorts to cup my bare ass.

“I didn’t stay on the bus to do this, Alice.” The anger on his face was seeping into the tone of his words, but I wasn’t going to get discouraged just yet. I needed to get out of this stalemate between us as badly as I needed air at this point.

“Do you want me to stop?” I said as I leaned forward to kiss his neck, where it appeared the source of his wonderful scent lingered, instantly igniting a flame in me.

I felt his fingers dig into the softness of my behind in response.

“Do you remember everything I told you last night, outside the hotel?”

Tension spread through my body at his question, but I was intent on not letting it show.

“I do.” I responded casually between kisses.

“Are you scared?”

My tension multiplied, but I managed to keep myself in check as I responded, “Yes.”

While my reaction to the question was dishonest, there was no need for my answer to be, as he already knew about my fears.

“Do you still trust me, after all the shit I pulled last night?”

With each question I felt increasingly cornered, and despite being sure about my answers, I couldn’t shake the feeling that they weren’t enough.

“Yes.”

A beat passed as I continued kissing his neck.

“I don’t believe you.”

My eyebrows knotted into a frown before I leaned back to look at him in disbelief at his statement.

“Fuck you.” While my words were harsh, they came casually, moreso to punctuate that his statement was absurd.

Suddenly his hand was at my throat, gripping me painfully like many times before, causing my nails to dig into his shoulders, the fabric there creasing and bunshing.

“You lied to me last night, doesn’t show a lot of trust, does it?”

His tone was unchanged from his previous questions, but his eyes were ablaze, staring intensely into mine as he held me in his vision. The action made it extremely obvious he was referring to my response to the choking last night; how I’d falsely told him it wasn’t too much.

Only a couple of seconds passed before his grip loosened substantially, causing me to relax as the pain fell away. But he kept his hand there, possessively holding my neck, clearly expecting answers.

I didn’t know what to respond since I didn’t quite understand why I’d lied myself, beyond feeling like it would prove some unspoken point about us.

Which I really didn’t like.

So instead of answering, I decided to resort to my own interrogation.

“Then why did you push me that far?” I asked awkwardly, his strong hand on my neck stopping me from opening my mouth fully as I spoke.

Both his hand and eyes relaxed at my question, his thumb began gently tracing my jawline slowly as he spoke, “Because you claim the most dangerous mistake you made the past decade was not taking any risks...” His eyes fell to my lips, then to my neck, ”So you’ve decided to let me do anything to your body, no matter how dangerous. That’s not taking a risk, love. It’s just being bloody stupid.”

I felt another frown appearing on my features. I was about to speak up, but he pulled me towards him, kissing my neck with the same tenderness he’d been tracing my jawline with, fanning the flames of the fire building inside me, making my hand slip into his softer than usual hair.

I could feel my body wanting to give up on this conversation, to start grinding my hips down on him and demand more, when he pulled away.

His eyes met mine and I saw the same desperation I was experiencing inside them, but there was also sadness there as he placed his hand on my chest, splaying his fingers.

“...Yet, when it comes to your heart, that’s off limits, innit?” He asked softly, the visible desperation turning significantly more emotional.

My words came even softer than his, his sadness echoing inside me, “I never said that.”

His hand on my chest fell away, “Well, is it?”

While scrambling inside my head, and my heart, for any type of answers I could offer him, I could feel my face contorting and straining along with me. After a moment of watching me struggling to provide him with as much as a noise, he spoke up.

“I’m not asking for your fucking hand in marriage, I’m not even asking you on a date. I just want to know if I even stand a chance here, or if you never see this going any further than this. Cause if it’s the latter, if you already know you only want sex from me, regardless of how brilliant it is…” A sombre grin made a quick appearance before falling away again as he continued, “I’m gonna need us to stop.”

While I hated the thought of stopping more than I could express, I felt a lot of sympathy for him, and the last thing I wanted to do was to cause him more suffering than I already had. But the truth is I needed more time; time to sort through the neglected mess inside me that consisted of more questions than answers.

With that knowledge, do I just turn him down now in order to potentially cause him less damage in the long run?

A wave of pain washed over me at the thought, causing me to recoil from the idea.

He must have seen it on my face, as the same pain was mirrored on him, painted all over him. Even the pattern his fingers mindlessly trailed on my back was dripping in hurt and longing.

“Do you remember our conversation on the plane, when I told you I’d destroy you if we kept going?” He asked, sounding almost close to tears.

I nodded.

“Since the reverse is a bit more likely, I need you to know that if you’re gonna destroy me, I’d much prefer if you did it sooner rather than later.” He said, giving me a dejected smile.

My heart ached at his words.

“I can’t tell you how badly I want to give you answers, but I’m… I want to say confused, but I don’t feel like that’s a strong enough descriptor.”

He searched my face, his fingers brushing away a loose lock of hair from my cheek.

“Confused, or scared, love?” He asked, referring to the fears I had expressed to him the other night, regarding having something – anything – worth losing.

“I really wish I knew.” I answered honestly, “Oli, I’m sorry, this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but I could really use some time.”

He huffed out a laugh, “That’s not the last thing I want to hear.”

The smile I gave him was meek, realising the stupidity of what I’d just said.

“And yeah, you can have some time.” He responded with most of the sadness no longer evident on him, leaving me to wonder if he pushed it aside, or if he felt some hope.

I thanked him and started to push off of him, upset but completely understanding of the fact that the sexual delights would have to stop while I figured some things out.

To my surprise he pulled me right back down on him.

I stared at him in confusion, his intense gaze falling to my lips as he spoke.

“...But while I wait, I’m willing to take the risk.”

Then his fingers laced into my hair and pulled me towards him, guiding me in for a kiss so heated I thought I’d combust on the spot.

... Subscribe to the story on Ao3 for future updates

#oli sykes fic #oli sykes #oli sykes fan fiction #bring me the horizon #smut #you got a taste now #Next chapter is almost ready as well ♥#oli sykes x reader

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osarina · 5 months ago

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Hellooo!!

So um this is my first ask ever so I’m a bit unsure bout things but I’m just gonna babble haha

I first found you through ao3 when only the first chapter of badlands was released and immediately got hooked, the writing was so good and I was soo ready for future chapters and then I saw the line “always end in tragedy.”

…😳 what did I get myself into?!! Haha but it ended happy!? I was like huh wasn’t this a doomed romance, but it ended pretty well and then unreal unearth came out and- oh I see what you meant now. Badlands whispered sweet nothings into my ear and push me gently into satin silks only for Unreal Unearth to German suplex me into the bed of nails that was hidden under the silks all along (BUT IN A GOOD WAY, in a good way??) The wasabi to the cake was finding out in UU that Badlands actually had a sad ending post credit, …OH THEY DOOMED DOOMED (THEY WERE SO CLOSE TO BEING MARRIED djshdkek 😭😭😭)

I reallly love fanfic writers like cause reading their works just remind me of the affections i felt for the characters and the series like how to I say this hahah like i first watched bsd a few years ago when i started getting into anime and i just found this series on Netflix and was like oh this looks interesting. They only had season 1 and afterwards I got into the series for a while as i really like the concept of detectives with superpowers haha but my interest was kinda basic like I wasn’t in deep, my only knowledge was s1, didn’t even read the manga haha, and just read some fanfics, and than after a while i moved on to other series.

But earlier this year when i was looking through my bookmarks and i came across this old bsd fanfic, it was just a oneshot so i was like lemme reread it why not and THAT basically change everything haha, reading it just remind me of why i loved these characters and the adventures they had and I sorta re-fell in love with bsd again and wanted to go rewatched the series and actually go read the manga haha and found out oh they have 5 seasons now, a parody manga , light novels? , stage plays??! and even a ACTUAL CANON AU ( oh beast, why beast🥹) like there’s so much content haha like there’s 5 different manga ??!! Like I left bsd when it was just goofy detectives adventures only to return to a vampire apocalypse and world ending fidget spinner??!! and I also realised that all the characters are named after actual authors and their abilities are after their works like that is soo coool, it’s kinda weird but cool which is kinda what bsd, weird in a fun way? Haha

Lowkey the reason why I watched some anime is cause I’ve read some fanfic with no knowledge of the actual canon and was like this fanfic was so goood let me go check out the source material hahha, me finding anime recommendations through fanfic✌️hahha like it wasn’t the anime or manga that brought me into the fandom but someone’s godamn incredible fic, haha and i think your fanfics is like that, like if I didn’t know about bsd before, after reading your works, I’ll be ready to jump right in no question asked ma’am. Mann I thought I already love this character as much as I could but after reading your fanfics , apparently falling harder is something I’m capable of haha like I feel a bit embarrassed writing all of this but I really looveee your works they are just so goood, reading each new series you have just sorta makes me refall in love with dazai again and again, even if I get hurt by the angst I just can’t help but go back haha

Do you have any advice for writing? 👉👈 cause I’ve been thinking about writing my own fanfics, got some oc ideas in my notes but never really gotten around on that haha so would you have advice for a first timer 🙏🙏🙏

Also I’ve been wondering since PM!reader has ability what about waterloo!reader , i don’t know whether you mentioned it before but what kinda ability did she have, if that’s okay to asked im just been real curious on that

ALSO ALSO ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

I hope you have a wonderful time!! All the well wishes for you 🎉🎉🎉🎉

so that about it’s, sorry for the long tangent haha

Thank you for sharing your masterpieces haha, I look forward to your future works 😊😊😊

also…dazai is so pretty sigh 😮‍💨

OMGGGG TUMBLR USER CHERERRRY WELCOME TO MY BLOG IM GIVING U THE BIGGEST AND WARMEST HUG

HAHAHAHAHHHH YOUR DESCRIPTION OF WATERLOO HAS ME DYING "badlands whispered sweet nothings into my ear to push me into satin silks only for uu to german suplex me into the bed of nails hidden underneath the silks" KDJFIOUAHDFASUIFHSDF IM ACTUALLY DECEASED THIS IS SO FUNNY AND THEN THE WASABI TO THE CAKE HAS ME CACKLING HAHAHAHH I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD APOLOGIZE BUT I CAN'T STOP GIGGLING

OMG u and me are truly the same - i love going to read works in fandoms ive never been in to see if i can find something to lure me into finally reading the manga/watching the anime. miss river has truly tempted me with some of her genshin fics but i fear i can only handle a single gacha at once. im desperately waiting for rylie to write for one piece because ive been teetering on starting it but i need something to push me over the edge because its just sooo long HAHAHAH

and omg i have to note because i was actually just thinking about how much i missed early seasons bsd before ... but it TRULY has changed so much, like i have so much nostalgia for the earlier seasons i miss when bsd was just about silly little detectives solving silly cases </333 get these vampires and godmen out of here pretty pls </333 no jk, im actually enjoying the plot (which seems to be an unpopular opnion in the fandom HAHAH) but i am excited to see where asagiri takes it. the 1 month wait time between chapters is killing me

BUT PLSSSS YOU'RE SO SWEET <333 im so glad i can help you refall in love with mister bungo stray dogs, he truly deserves all of the love in the world. every time someone comes into my ask box telling me that i've like changed their view on his character or made them fall even harder it makes me so happy HAHAHH

omg i made a post a while back that i'll link here for you!! i hope it can help at all!!

AHHHHH okay!! so waterloo reader in uu & badlands canon does NOT have an ability, she is truly a civilian. but in the last chapter of uu, dazai alludes to there being universes out there where she somehow ended up with the port mafia when he ended up elsewhere (ada, civilian, government) and in those universes, she DID develop an ability. i haven't fleshed it out yet, but whether or not her ability manifests is triggered by an event that happens with her brother (iceman) when she's like 13/14 ish

AND DON'T APOLOGIZE <3333 i adore long asks thank you so much

#ᡣ𐭩 carina’s love letters #ᡣ𐭩 from user: chererrry

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time-to-write-and-suffer · 1 year ago

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What are some songs you have picked out for Sidra? /What are some key songs in her playlist?

Anon you have unironically bestowed upon me the greatest gift any writer on tumblr could ever receive: Being asked about OC playlists.

I am going insane as I type this. I hope you have a wonderful day and that some of these tunes will be to your liking!!! ❤❤❤

I also added some of my favorite/most relevant lyrics where applicable because I couldn't stop myself, hope you don't mind!

Zoë Keating - Escape Artist

The first song on Sidra's playlist, it perfectly captures her entire vibe. I love the crunchy sound of the cello, the deep notes, the tense anticipation that never quite gets resolved, and the stoic melancholy of this melody (pretentious).

Madi Diaz- Ashes

Captures the vibe of Sidra and Reese's (human FWB) doomed-from-the-start relationship.

LP - Muddy Waters

Mostly on here because I think it's pretty but also I imagine Sidra's singing voice sounds about like this.

Florence + The Machine - What the Water Gave Me

Self-explanatory inclusion, one of the songs that inspired the vibe of the faery wip from the start. Also fits Sidra's semi-suicidal attitude throughout the book.

Ruelle - Take It All and Up in Flames

More vibes, but the lyrics also fit quite well for Sidra's journey.

Lord Huron - Way Out There

Did a whole edit of this one.

Woodkid - Iron

A soldier on my own, I don't know the way I'm riding up the heights of shame I'm waiting for the call, the hand on the chest I'm ready for the fight, and fate

Some of the lyrics work rly well but the fuckin SOUND of this is everything. Also the name, obviously.

Heilung - Krigsgaldr

Coexistence, conflict, combat Devastation, regeneration, transformation That is the best I can do for you I see a grey gloom on the horizon That promises a powerful sun to rise, melt away all moons It will make the old fires of purification, purification Look like dying embers, look like dying embers

This song is 9 minutes long and the English bit in the middle is so hardcore, but this is my favorite bit of it because it encapsulates a lot of Sidra's purifying but also terrifying rage.

Florence + The Machine - No Light, No Light

Honorable mention to this even though it's technically in my Sidra/Val playlist. This is every #deep person's sad romance song so it's mine as well. BUT! I can't not include it because it's the entire reason Val has blue eyes lol and inspired like 90% of their dynamic back when I was only starting the story.

The rest of the songs are pretty much soundtracks from The Witcher 3, and Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice.

#a lot of these songs are spoilers if you really listen lmao #so there's that truefans #faery wip

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lav-endermoon · 2 years ago

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hiya lav! i know that this might be a difficult question to answer (as i'm indecisive and have a difficult time answering it myself lmao) but what would you rank as your 5 all-time favorite los campesinos songs?

OOOOHOHOHO this is a difficult question indeed but i will try :)

in no particular order:

in medias res - one of my fav album openers ever. love the strings, love the little sentimental details in the lyrics, love the slow buildup to the end, love the outro so so so much. i could go on for ages this song is a religious experience fr. and the acoustic version??? oh my god

to tundra - also a religious experience istg. super calming and upsetting at the same time. the imagery is so beautiful and when that guitar solo hits something Happens to me

we are beautiful, we are doomed - need i say any more. the energy in this song just blows me away. some of my favourite lyrics ever

this is how you spell HAHAHA… - that monologue scratches my brain just right. translating goosebumps from braille? hello????

for a fifth one i’m torn between who fell asleep in and i just sighed (i’m a romance is boring girlie through and through). the lyrics to who fell asleep in are actual poetry and the ending of i just sighed is,,, ethereal??

might be a basic answer but you! me! dancing! and death to los campesinos! get honorable mentions

tysm for the ask <33

#los campesinos!#my post #asks #music

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whatever-you-can-give-me · 1 year ago

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20 Question Fic Writer Tag

@madnessmadness tagged me in this like a month ago and i never saw it until now whoops. functional hellsite

How many works do you have on AO3? 311!

What is your AO3 word count? 628,514

What fandoms do you write for? currently, trigun!

What are your top five fics by kudos? #1 is a Lucifer TV fic from five years ago that i put very little effort into but it's the main ship for a show that was very popular at the time so it haunts me. #2, #4, and #5 are good omens collab fics <3 #3 is for reasons wretched and divine, as it deserves

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? i respond to comments from whatever my current fandom is, and sometimes the fandom before it. and then trigun kind of took off and i kind of took off within trigun fandom and then i posted a fic every day for a month so now i have a backlog of. 68 comments. whoops. i'll get to it!

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? excluding things where i play around with canonical angst, hmm. very few people actually read my cowboy bebop fics, and statistics show i am the only person who liked the doomed live action show, but we never had a choice but to give up is a very fun & rather dark au of a specific moment from the live action show.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i'm a fan of happy endings in general, recently it's and i would give all this and heaven too which is essentially a Fix It With Vampires fic.

Do you get hate on fics? not so much anymore, but it has happened. honestly when trigun took off i expected more bullshit from people.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i do, when i'm in the mood for it. usually feelingsy smut with trans characters, or some moderately weird kinky shit. usually both at the same time.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? not really a crossover fan, per say. i think too hard about the details.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? hopefully not!

Have you ever had a fic translated? yes!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? i wouldn't be the writer i am today without @irisbleufic mentoring me by way of several collabs in the good omens fandom years ago.

What's your all-time favourite ship? that's a hard one. i'm going to go with the wildcard option and say elendira/razlo. they're everything to me.

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will? i'm not jinxing myself like that.

What are your writing strengths? i'm very technically skilled, i know all the tools and tricks that make Good, Proficient Writing, and some part of that transcends what feels like rote skill-building to me into some kind of style.

What are your writing weaknesses? plot. i'm not a plot guy, most of the time.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? as a monolingual schlub, neutral. i get why people do it, especially for multilingual authors, but it's a bit clunky/immersion-breaking to have to open google translate or click to a footnote. also Random Spanish (For Romance!) makes me cringe.

First fandom you wrote for? ...anne of green gables. i have no idea if the notebook i wrote it in still exists anywhere but i clearly remember writing something about anne and....... gilbert? i think is his name?

Favourite fic you've ever written? i already mentioned for reasons wretched and divine, which is tied with nobody said it was easy. both projects made me a better writer, and i love both fics dearly.

tagging anyone who wants to do it!

#trigun fic #this reminds me there's an end of year writing retrospective i want to yoink from a friend's dreamwidth

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junkshop-disco · 2 years ago

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For that writers thing, can you tell us 13, 18, 57 and 68? Thank you!

I just answered 13 in way too much detail here but also forgot to mention that my top three playlist-able songs for fic writing purposes of all time, and across all fandoms, are:

The Promise, originally by When In Rome but I also really like this version by Samia. Fade into You, originally by Mazzy Star but I also love this version by Blonde Maze. And Just Like Honey, originally by the Jesus and Mary Chain but also this version by Headless Heroes and this version by Annie.

Like if you want to sum up what one of my fics is about, it's all right there. We've got friends to lovers, dawning realisation, and a sort of baffled by feelings thing. That's it. That's the fic lol. This is a tangent, but Terry Hall died recently and that reminded me what a huge influence he was on me as a writer. His lyrics just have a way of cutting to the chase of romance and being so open about the hopeful/hopelessness dichotomy of falling in love. Some of my fave lyrics are Sense 'I'm standing high on tiptoes looking over fences, waiting for somebody like you to kiss me senseless.' Thinking of You 'Who knows, maybe tomorrow, we can share each other's sorrow, and compare our graveside manner as we wave our lonely banners.' And Forever J 'Uncertain, coy, and hard to please, she kisses me through gritted teeth, but when I'm weak, she whispers dreams.' Pretty much everything I want to do in fic is built on my love of Terry Hall's words.

18. Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research?

I do now, although it wasn't always so. A Matter of Time is probably the most research I've ever done, because it's set in 1927 and heavily features clockmaking and clock repair as a plot. So I gave myself a crash course in the history of clocks, the different type of clocks available at the time, how to take them apart, and how to repair them. I like to think it enriched the fic not to fudge the details. All the clocks in it are real, apart from the one right at the end, which is a sort of amalgam of two different clocks because I couldn't find one single clock that was whimsical enough and tricky enough to repair for what I wanted it to do in the narrative. I also did a lot of research for general historical accuracy, including at one point looking up whether drainpipes existed in 1927 for a one line, throwaway joke.

57. How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?

It depends on the fic tbh. I've written a few fics like Learning to Speak the Language of Flowers where the symbolism is very much key to the fic itself (literally all the plants and flowers mentioned in the fic Mean Something) and in my current Fate fic, there's a bit of foreshadowing because it's just that sort of fic. There's a lot of runes chat and fortune telling with cards plays a part in it, so there's a little dusting of foreshadowing because it sits well thematically I think. Mostly I do that sort of thing for myself, though, and if anyone else picks up on it it's a bonus. I think a fic should be readable and enjoyable without it.

68. Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?

So many. Two of my all time faves are Derryere's RPF of Doom (which is no longer available) and Minor Hue's The Good Times Are Killing Me (which you need an LJ to view but that link is to podfic of it). They both have lines I think about all the time and a real sense of rawness to them, they capture what desire and confusion and heartbreak feels like in a way that's genuine and fresh. I'm also a huge fan of Demonology and the Tri-Phasic Model of Trauma: An Integrative Approach by Nmn, which is genuinely one of the best things I've ever read. It is quietly devastating in a way you see coming from the first chapter, and yet are still unprepared for when what you knew was going to happen happens. Idk if they influenced me so much as inspired me. Reading them was like... yes, this is what I'm trying to do, this is the bar to aim for.

Thank you for playing 💛

#meme me

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sol-consort · 4 months ago

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Hey, I've been reading up on your Dragon Age Inquisition adventures! Your Inquisitor is indeed pretty and I love the explanation you give for having her be a dual dagger rogue. Snotty nobles <3

You're right, the world is really big. The common advice is to get out of the Hinterlands ASAP or you will get bogged down, but back when I played the game (which was around the time it was released 😭 so my memories are bound to be even more muddled than my memories of P2 when I first found your Patho blog), I was categorically incapable of doing this until I did everything there was to do. I left no stone unturned, in any of the areas, and never lost interest, but I also had a lot more time and patience for that type of game then. That being said, I'm excited for DA4.

I also always had a physical strategy guide open in front of me so that made it more manageable, lol.

Cassandra and Vivienne are my faves ♥️ "something something characters who are religious are hot" asdfhg honestly that's so real. When it's a fantasy setting I feel the same apparently.

In my first playthrough, my Inquisitor was an elf archer and she became my favorite little gremlin ever ♡ She only looks gremlinesque though; she was rather diplomatic and moderate, or as Lana Del Rey once said, "No moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality," a.k.a. the human behind the screen wanted to experience all companion quests and be universally liked.

She romanced Solas and I loved it! Listen yeah I know some people can be a little annoying about Solas (stans and haters both) and I'm not attracted to the guy, but narratively it was satisfying. Yes he's a dillweed, whatever, I don't care 😇 #noregrets. I would have romanced Cassandra if possible, but I played on PS4, so no mods for me.

Second playthrough, my Inquisitor was a human mage who romanced Cullen. I was going for the whole internalized magephobia thing and the Cullenmance seemed the proper course of action for that, but I won't lie, it was kind of dull. Absolutely would have romanced Vivienne in this run instead if I could have. Similar to your Inquisitor, mine also quickly started to believe she was the Herald of Andraste for real.

I feel like I'm always doomed to fall for the unromanceable companions/characters. A fact that could perhaps be psychoanalyzed.

Here are the bbs. Sorry for the hastily cobbled together composition.

While we're on the topic of magephobia uhhhhhhhh I've never played DA2 but Knight Commander Meredith?? Now there's an evil woman I need biblically.

I hope you're well and taking care of yourself :)

wait what? So I'm not actually the herald of Andraste?? if that's true, that's a massive plot spoiler. Why would you mention it, I wanted to experience the game organically, this is my first time playing any dragon age game.

I didn't ask to know about cullen's romance being dull, I wanted to experience it for myself and form my own opinion about him. Same with Solas, I didn't think he's popular in the fandom, I haven't looked through the main tag yet to avoid spoilers.

I understand that you're excited, but you shouldn't have gone into as much detail as you have. You got to play the game many times, this is my first, I'm not even using a guide and it's hard enough as it is to accept my losses when they come and not worry about approval.

I would've loved this ask if you had just skipped over your playthrough details and just showed me the inquisitor pictures. I know you didn't mean to spoil things but information will slip you by.

I thought Vivienne was romance-able, I swear I picked flirty options with her...she isn't, huh.

#wdym I'm not actually the herald #I'm super sad and bummed out damn #I really wanted a joan of arc moment #:(#☆dragon age #☆other fandoms

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embersofstardust · 7 months ago

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rant below just ignore it tbh I just wanted to get it out but didn't wanna clog up the dash

idk I just woke up from a nap and like,,, it hit me out of nowhere like a fucking wave that I've. missed a lot in life. especially in the romance department. maybe it's bc prides around now, maybe it's bc a friend of mine just had a birthday, I'm not sure but I just don't know how to process and handle these feelings. ive never done anything romantically with anyone. I'm turning twenty seven soon and have never. never so much as held hands with someone interested in me or went on a date. how do you tell people that? how would you tell a future potential partner that? it's embarrassing to even mention. I try to joke about it when it comes up but god, sometimes it hits me HARD that there's a deeper than bone deep ache in my chest for wanting to know what that's like. am I so uninteresting? so unapproachable? I try to be more interesting and put myself out there more and nothing happens. I try my best to be kind a friendly to people as just a life motto and it does nothing. I know some people are just doomed to not ever experience it and I genuinely believe I'm one of those people. I try not to think about it too hard but it sits lower than my heart and is this empty gnawing hunger that I can't satiate when it rears it's head. I can't even talk to people about it either because they don't GET it. they don't understand. having one partner in highschool and nothing since is still SOMETHING. saying it's worth waiting your time and oh it happens when you least expect it is so invalidating and frustrating. I know I hit a lot of categories that make people uninterested in me, but nobody has even gotten that far to find out. there's been a total of three people ever interested in me ever, two were stalkers and one was a friend's boyfriend at the time who mentioned it in the past tense. I have my good days, I have days where I'm confident and love myself and I'm working on making those more and more frequent. but god, what does it take for someone to approach and ask on a date? to hold hands with someone you've been flirting with? i had a late start to life between being sheltered/emotionally abused to the point of seclusion, being in the country, being poor, and being neurodivergent, but I feel like at almost twenty seven SOMETHING should have happened by now, right? i don't know what I'm doing wrong other than I just have a doomed heart or soul. how do you say you still haven't had a first kiss? that you have NEVER been the person given a second glance? someone said my hair was pretty the other day and I realized that it's been two years since I've gotten a compliment on a physical feature of mine. it's always clothes or glasses, never on something that's actually myself. maybe it's the melancholy hitting me, my brain has decided it's been too long feeling good about myself but fuck is it hitting me hard today. there's no way to describe that curiosity towards it, the wondering what you're doing wrong, that just grows exponentially every passing year.

#maybe its bc my hormones are having issues idk #or maybe bc i haven't seen my sister in a while and being in the house alone is getting to me #but its even slipping into my little daydreams and its frustrating

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gleefullypolin · 9 months ago

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Trying to stay neutral in the face of some of the worst takes you've ever seen is...hard. I try to remember that I may have had the same takes if you took away 10+ years of my fandom experiences. Kneejerk reactions and doom spiraling is very much how I expect younger me might have acted. Though I could do without how literally things are taken at the moment, that's tiring.

Glad to be of service! 🫡 If my main weren't connected to a side blog for another fandom where I know I'd bring possible unwanted attention to myself I'd happily out myself.😄

The double standards: it's very sigh worthy in general and I don't disagree, the men and some specifically, are being held to a standard that was probably unfair to hold them to in the first place. I do realize that a lot of stuff has been fanon or built up the last couple of years and I get it, it's hard to lose your idea of someone. I do think that there's a good chance that men in our ships in general are being held to a standard of the female gaze that isn't about physicality but female empowerment in general. So many men judge women for having sex then immediately do what they're saying women shouldn't do.

It's not really fair to the male characters but the idea that a man would wait for and only want one woman, to be powerless against her in the way women are often portrayed for men in regular media--I get it the appeal that it would carry for some. Men are usually held to a standard of some kind they're sure to miss. If you asked me do I remember meeting my significant other I can tell you details and time and place but if you asked him I'd bet he'd not be able to say much other than he says he knows I was it for him.

I'm with you, I hope that people remember that these are real people not the characters they play and even if they were, to mind their manners.

I have come to just not enjoy screeners at all over the years. I remember one using an emoji for something and you can only imagine how that went. They were biased on top of it and were 100% wrong in its intent. It was a little much.

I think if both scenes are true then we have to have the first one to have the other and the latter one is the only one that matters. The audience is not going to remember a sentence or a throwaway line but they'll remember the scenes themselves. If a throwaway line is enough to get the point across in a visual medium, there's no need to have him staring at her longingly. There's no need to create physical tension between them. They can just tell each other and whoop, problems solved.

I think this, if true, can be handled better but I also think people in fandom forget the largest audience is a general one and they're going to need some hand holding reminders of what's going on. Colin being unable to perform is a damning indictment of what he's done to himself and just how much Penelope affects him. And I have to say that two scenes I'd wager are less than 2-3 minutes total are not going to ruin the romance of a show that's going to have 8 near one hour episodes.

If anything about any of it was even mentioned to Penelope or at all after the fact I would be very surprised. This sort of thing feels very much just a way to establish something with Colin himself. I wouldn't be sad to see it not be true but if it is, I feel it's gotten more importance in fandom than the show is ever going to give it.

I can't imagine Colin being needlessly cruel to Penelope, his words were thoughtless and I'd love to know his side of that story but irrespective of romantic feelings, this man cares deeply for her as it is.

Oh my I went back and checked my original Tumblr blog and I first posted 13 years ago and I still cringe immensely as some of the takes I had back then. Spiraling doesn’t even begin to touch what I was doing back then. Like girl, we had full on meltdowns, actual knock down drag out fights, and even in person stand offs in our fandom. I laugh about it now, most of us are either friends, or acquaintances who see each other around on Facebook or twitter but none of it even matters anymore.

But it got so bad there before the show ended that I eventually abandoned that blog and ended up starting over years later AFTER OUAT had pretty ended on my Captain Swan blog where that family is just a very lovely group of women that have tolerated my absolute abandonment due to my complete anxiety of life. Lol

I didn’t know what to expect with Bridgerton, or even what to expect with a regency type show, it really wasn’t my type of show. And I didn’t know that it had existing books with it until after I had seen season 1. All the girls at work were like “OH girl swoon, you have to watch this show.” And I have a very lovely friend, Natalie, who had written a book called “Emmie and the Tudor King” about the Tudors and I was trying very hard to learn all the rules around that world, so I thought what the hell, lets try this. And now here the hell I am! In another fandom with an actively shooting show.

But after season 1 and 2 with Simon, Anthony, and Benedict, I just figured it make 100% sense that Colin would end up sleeping around. LOL because damn…there is always one seen isn’t there. Maybe it’s a Shondaland thing, or a timeframe thing, but its definitely a theme and its coming to our screen whether we want it or not. I saw a comment earlier today somewhere that if we got up and went to the bathroom during it, it would be over before we got back, so I’m taking solace in that!

I hope they treat Nic and Luke with respect after the season airs. I’ve met my fair share of seeing the actors take the heat of their characters and I have a hole in my heart for the trauma I carry around that fandom I spoke of earlier with how fandom got involved in the actors lives and the result. Again, being young and seeing the spirals of fandom, I feel like I could write a book lol.

Lets get rid of screeners. I get why they have them, pump the hype, but do they? Or do they pump the anger and anxiety? Sometimes they use their “power” to pump the ship wars or stir the wrong sentiment. I know the saying is that all attention is good PR but is it really?

I can’t imagine that Pen finds out about the women or the visit he makes there. I mean yes she or perhaps more likely LW may have something to say about his sudden swagger or new found ladies man behavior, but Pen is not a delicate flower either. She is Lady Whistledown and I don’t think she will wilt. I think last season may have hardened her a bit.

#my asks #wonderful people

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kdramacrybaby · 3 years ago

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Top 10 Favorite Kdramas

As I have now watched my 50th kdrama, I thought it would be fun to go over them all and pick my current top 10 🥳. I had a really hard time placing them all, and my opinions might change again, but as of now my top 10 kdramas of all time are:

__________

1) Memories of the Alhambra (2018)

This drama is what really got me into watching kdramas back when it first came out, and I have still yet to find a drama that tops it. It may be nostalgia, but I just love this drama and the emotional rollercoaster it put me through. I have already watched through it twice, and will definitely watch it again someday.

2) The Uncanny Counter (2020)

This one blew me away right from the start, and it has absolutely everything I love in a good drama. If you like fantasy, found family, and an overall amazing story, this one is for you! If I'm going to rewatch another drama in the future, this will definitely be the first one.

3) Mad Dog (2017)

I came for Woo Do-hwan, but I stayed for literally every single character. Another found family story that just absolutely breaks your heart in the best way, along with some amazing crime-fighting shenanigans - what more could you want?

4) Vincenzo (2021)

This went from being a drama I didn't want to watch, to now being one of my all-time favorites. It is brutal in so many ways, but somehow also one of the funniest dramas I have ever watched. Fantastic drama!

5) Crash Landing On You (2019)

Somehow, I am a little surprised this didn't end up higher on the list because this drama just absolutely destroyed me in the best way. Truly one of the best romance stories I have ever watched across any media.

6) Hotel del Luna (2019)

When watching this drama, I obviously loved it, but I didn't think it would ever make my top 10. Since though, I have often found myself thinking about it, and have compared a lot of other dramas to it. Other than being a visually gorgeous masterpiece, it is one of the few dramas to just completely break me.

7) Sisyphus: The Myth (2021)

I watched this one alongside a friend of mine, and we had a blast trying to figure out what the hell was happening. Even through plot holes and time travel (which I usually hate in media), I just loved watching this. I've seen people love and hate this for different reasons, but I don't really care, I just had a good time watching.

8) Navillera (2021)

Another absolutely stunning drama that had me crying my eyes out. Such a tragic story told in a beautiful way, teaching us to live in the moment and never take anything for granted. Find what you love and don't mind what other people think.

9) Happiness (2021)

I just recently finished watching this drama, but there is no doubt in my mind that it belongs on this list. Despite being filled with my literal worst nightmare, and the cut-short ending, I still somehow loved being stressed throughout the whole show.

10) The Last Empress (2018)

Now I will always be the first to say that this drama is a hot mess, but it was one of the first dramas I ever watched (and the second to rewatch), and I loved every second. It is a masterpiece, and I will die on that hill.

Honorable mentions in no particular order:

Her Private Life (2019)

Descendants of the Sun (2016)

The Untamed (2019)

100 Days My Prince (2018)

Doom At Your Service (2021)

Sell Your Haunted House (2021)

Your Honor (2018)

Squid Game (2021)

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spacedykez · 2 years ago

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ever wondered what happens in the otterverse? you're in the right place

season 1 >war is occurring (the cloobies war) >divorce anon appears and tells Paci (who is then still trying to play Kevin) about a third faction (Reddits) >paci says star agrees >divorce anon comes back to lifesteal-headcanons and says basically the same thing >nix dislikes it >divorce says paci agreed with them >nix jokingly threatens to get the divorce papers >divorce anon gets their name >paci appears briefly and asks why they’re talking about divorce. nix says xe don’t know. paci leaves. >divorce anon ties up nix (and several others) and takes over the theater. >mass confusion. >paci comes back. “oh my gosh u have a hostage thats so sexy haha” (/lh) and nix groans. >discord’s hunt for divorce anon’s identity begins >divorce anon talks to the discord only through paci. maybe divorce anon is listening from somewhere and texting paci, who is talking to discord on the ground? or discord is listening in while paci is texting them divorce anon’s thoughts? this is one that i don’t have a concrete in-story explanation for. >paci and divorce anon start flirting. the discord mostly ignores this. >lawyer anon shows up to sue divorce anon. >#freenix2022 >lawyer anon tries to sue basically everyone. >divorce anon and paci are having homoeretic roleplay >they are joking about everyone dying in the end. oh the foreshadowing. >divorce anon’s lawyer appears to tell paci to stop flirting with divorce anon. paci, unsurprisingly, does not listen >anons begin fighting. they attack divorce anon >lawyer and detective start arguing over who killed who (nobody’s Actually dead. yet) >lawyer^2 (shipname) begin flirting >paci starts threatening people with a knife >paci kills someone >divorce anon starts quoting hamilton >”otter i don't know how much longer i can hold on. the bit is weighing on my shoulders like atlas holding the sky. i don't know how much longer i can stay anonymous. when i said a tragedy is this what it meant for me? was i always doomed to reach insanity? otter, my love, my enemy, is this where all this gets me? was i ever supposed to reach my victory? whose tragedy was this, whose story? will i ever get to see the light or will i fall. when it comes down to it will i run or fight? who was i meant to be. myself this mask or some other identity? when everything is ashes will there be new trees or will there be just me. will i survive the role i gave myself. am i the villain in my history?” >paci and divorce anon have a dramatic exchange while everyone watches. cc!paci would like to take this moment to shout out wallace-marte because damn that poetry’s actually amazing >I AIM MY PISTOL AT THE SKY- (paci does) >paci shoots the roof of the theater and it collapses, killing them and divorce anon. >nix survives but xe paid for it >in the aftermath wallace reveals he was playing divorce anon >end of s1

note: at some point detective and c!philip have an enemies 2 lovers romance arc. its on philip’s blog though so i have no clue when it happens in relation to otterverse events. it’s sometime after s1 ends, i believe? it’s definitely before s2 starts.

season 2 >lung anon shows up in the city and from the start, c!otter is not gonna take any shit >otter has been called a worm. they are not amused >pedant and blood anon appear. pedant is being pretentious and blood is being ominous and cryptic. >otter mentions they saw c!paci and divorce anon die >otter mocks the supernatural entities >binary anon’s first ask. the arg is technically non-canon cause it contradicts another important plot point but i thought it was worth mentioning >lung and blood are still being ominous and cryptic. otter is unamused. >this continues for a while, they’re talking about annihilation and apocalypses and otter is not taking anything. >otter mentions wanting coffee, and asks whether the supernatural beings like ketchup on mac and cheese >the supernatural beings do not like ketchup on mac and cheese >paci asks about fries in milkshakes, beginning a debate that will continue for literal years in canon and also transcends lifetimes. /hj was that a spoiler. hope not. >crescent shows up >”Um. EXCUSE ME. “pedant is KINDAAA boring ngl no offense?” You’re calling ME, the great Pedant Anon, boring? Should I find another anon and kiss them on the lips so as to not bore the onlookers to tears, just to prove that I’m special or interesting or whatever? I’ll have you know, my mommy already tells me that every single day! I don’t need to prove anything to you, OR to the other anons! I’m better than everyone else in this askbox, and I don’t need to prove it!” >lung still wants to be summoned, blood still wants annihilation. get a new thing already you’re overusing the word. >otter bets a supernatural entity (blood) that she can beat them in a fight. >harbinger anon is also tired of blood and lung >the flesh monsters appear. the original flesh monster was described as “a large being, the color of fresh blood coated over an old and dry layer. It oozes and it smells of rotting flesh. It shakes. A droplet lands on your lip and you instinctively lick it away, only for its revolting metallic taste to fill your mouth and make you gag. You try to comprehend it's ever-shifting Everything and Nothing but to no avail. It is staring directly at you.” >crescent starts being vaguely ominous. >harbinger shows up to defend otter >otter, in the face of death: YOU CAN KILL ME BUT AT LEAST BE POLITE ABOUT IT KAY THANKS >harbinger anon kills the flesh monster >raccoon anon shows up and starts talking to otter, asking about what’s going on >rose anon appears >pedant wants to kiss otter. otter says sure. >suffering anon appears. >at some point worm anon has said hello and both c!otter and cc!otter adore them >blood anon keeps calling otter a worm. otter is increasingly annoyed >otter and divorce anon 2 give the anons garlic bread >i feel the need to mention that the snark from otter is hilarious >get in bitches we’re going to wendys >otter and her gang of supernatural entities terrorize a couple of poor wendy’s workers. >this isn’t relevant to the story at all but it’s at this point that we get our first otterverse fanart, and cc!otter posts the otterverse explanation post. we also made designs for otterverse characters. okay now back to the story >the anons and otter discuss how much they all hate cars and whether fries in milkshakes are Bad or Good while traumatizing several wendy’s workers. >the wendys employess are kissing now (/j /not actually but their romance arc begins) >anyways otter finds a weird star charm thing >pink text anon’s in the background being cryptic and ominous >the wendy’s employees are having the only healthy relationship in the entire otterverse >pink text anon tells felix to “protect the sea.” simultaneously pink text anon wants otter to pull a lever >felix and otter meet >tin star appears >c!gumy starts her red string board >the bots want souls >don’t forget that the anons are still being ominous and cryptic. otter is still having none of it although they’ve stopped really fighting with them.

>oh no now otter’s being gloomy and ominous too. >suffering anon hears ominous voices too!! nobody’s happy, how fun!! >some weird flesh monster bursts through a window and asks if otter is 'the one the bloodhive’ has been talking to >weird flesh monster can talk. it wants to kill otter. otter’s anons/friends do not want this. >tin star, racoon anon, divorce anon 2, and smiley kill the flesh monster while otter starts screaming at pink text anon. >otter eventually gives in to pink text anon and lets them guide her. >otter pulls the lever. >everyone falls unconscious for a moment and the apocalypse gets worse. there are more flesh monsters now and its raining blood. >tin star and raccoon anon are flirting while otter breaks down crying. >crescent and rose try to reassure otter that it’s okay. >pink text wanted to ruin everyone’s lives because their own life was ruined. >felix and disco run into the building. otter stops crying and says hi >anons are being ominous AGAIN >tin star and raccoon have left and are just going to starbucks now. okay i guess >c!gumy is guilty that she failed to stop pink text >everyone is discussing what’s happened. a couple anons are still being ominous. >paper and marri show up >paper accuses otter of being involved in what’s going on. otter denies it, suspiciously. keeps repeating that they didn’t do it and it wasn’t their fault. >otter suddenly resolves to “fix it” >otter is still denying that they’ve done anything and is focusing on “fixing it” >now otter’s being weird. memory issues. collapsing under the guilt. >pedant anon is flirting with otter again >we’re going to go kill flesh monsters and stop the apocalypse, yeahh!!!! >otter begins quoting hamilton in strikethrough text. we know how this will end. >pink text anon shows up to help otter fix this >otter goes with pink text anon >otter starts saying goodbye to people >felix and gumy warn otter not to do anything, but otter doesn’t listen. >gumy tackles wisp and they fight while otter runs for the lever >wendys^2 and racoonstar are living their happy lives while the rest of the gang is killing flesh monsters. >otter flips the lever >everyone notices what otter is doing and starts screaming her name. >c!gumy and c!wisp (pink text) are killed by meat monsters >felix is being attacked by meat monsters >otter throws felix away from the monsters, saving her life, but killing otter >o.. otter’s last words were… “i love you…” [cc!otter is on the verge of tears over this] >pedant anon died offscreen >stickynote lays down to sleep next to otter’s body >felix cries over otter’s death >the survivors bury the bodies >s2 ends

in between seasons, wendys^2 builds a new city with the survivors. not all the meat monsters die, but they learn to adapt. also at some point we decided it’d be funny if the meat monsters were actually tbh creatures.

#the otter splashes #the otterverse

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swansong-if · 3 years ago

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What made you want to adapt Swan Lake, specifically? There are lots of fairytales in the public domain (I'm planning an IF of one, myself, though I don't know if I'll ever write it), what was it in Swan Lake in particular that called to you?

OH fun question thank you!!! Under the cut in case it gets long

I definitely knew I wanted to start from an existing story because it felt easier for a beginner and I've never written anything long before. I considered a few options between fairy tales and Greek myths I love, in particular Little Mermaid, The Nutcracker, Rapunzel, Orpheus & Eurydice, Apollo & Daphne and Amor & Psyche.

I almost immediately scratched out Orpheus & Eurydice because I knew I wanted my story to also have a happy ending (and you can't really give those two a happy ending since the whole point is the doomed romance); then I decided that rewriting a fairy tale rather than a myth better fit my writing style, and basically I narrowed down my choices to Swan Lake and The Little Mermaid.

Both stories had elements that interested me, and I think a common theme was definitely the theme of transformation and the concept of humanity in a larger sense; I knew I wanted to work my version of a story around the idea of monstrosity and the internal struggle of not feeling worthy/deserving of love. What drew me to those two stories in particular was the potential of having some elements of horror applied to a more 'disney-like' setting, and getting a bit closer to how fairy tales were originally narrated (creepy af and full of pain 😂).

I ended up considering the fact that unlike The Little Mermaid, Swan Lake had a considerably simpler storyline that would've allowed me to focus on very few characters and just really give space to the themes I mentioned, so I guess the final decision was quite pragmatic lol. But other than that I loved the bird symbolism and the general vibes of the ballet, which is a favourite of mine 🥰

#>it did get long JKSDJKSD #anonymous #asks #dev.txt

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omegalomania · 3 years ago

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I think tumblr ate my ask or it just didn't sent but what are your favorite Bastille songs / what are some songs you recommend?

i did NOT get this ask im very sorry anon.

it's genuinely hard for me to narrow down cause bastille is pretty up there in terms of favorite artists. i love all their shit, but a special mention goes out to their second studio album wild world since it's the one that made me a Fan

uh so here's a primer i guess i spent too much time on this lmao.

if you wanna listen to their big hits:

flaws - their first single in the uk. if you ever listened to ship playlists on 8tracks in like 2013-2015 then you've probably heard this song or a variant on it at some point.

pompeii - this is the song that really put them on the map and you definitely know it. it dominated the charts all over the place.

happier - the marshmello song that you've definitely heard before too. i think bastille wrote this for justin bieber or some shit but then decided they liked it too much to give it to him? lmao. anyway if you're not digging the version you hear on the radio all the time i recommend trying the stripped down version

good grief - their big hit off their second album. big in the uk, didn't really make as many waves elsewhere, but it's a really solid song anyway. one of those "upbeat tunes that's actually really fucking sad" ones

things we lost in the fire - another one off their first album. if you live in a wildfire area this might not be one to turn to. or maybe you'll find it cathartic idk i certainly do!!

quarter past midnight - a song about escapism, as was fitting when it was released in 2018 and equally fitting now. running away for a night of fucking around with friends, craving any kind of brief departure from the chaos of the modern world

skulls - this one was not a hit or a single and is technically a bonus track but i'm including it because once again if you ever clicked on a ship playlist on 8tracks in like 2013-2015 you've heard this one. and you know what that was justified this one is also good

if you wanna feel existentially depressed:

their whole discography. i mean i kid but i also don't. that's just kind of how bastille does it. BUT IN ALL SERIOUSNESS ones that hit me in particular would beeee

two evils - kind of a grim, haunting one introspecting about morality of the self.

oblivion - musing about the afterlife, love, and how time changes all of us.

those nights - contemplating what it is we seek when we plunge into reckless escapism, and the inherent loneliness of it; how even when surrounded by people there's still the pressure of the world outside, continuously coming to pieces

the draw - this one was written about the pull of pursuing a career in music vs. staying home with family and friends. in a broader sense, it can apply to a lot of things. i always felt it resonated with feelings of paranoia and displacement

winter of our youth - discusses childhood, nostalgia, and regret. if it feels like everything's slipping away, is it easier to relive the past, especially if the past is tinted rose?

sleepsong - loneliness, desperation, and the cyclical, abyss-like nature of all it encapsulates

if you want discussion of serious topics:

final hour - a bonus track off their second album that also became a bonus track off their third album? anyway this song talks about climate change and gun control. happy stuff

doom days - this one talks about, uh, everything! doomscrolling, political divides, escalating national tensions, climate change again, etc.

the currents - a song centered on political rhetoric and the power that figureheads have over the masses, the way they can orchestrate hate. basically it's not so subtly aimed at donald trump lmao, dan's literally sung it as much in a few live settings

WHAT YOU GONNA DO??? - social media addiction and the way capitalism and corporate interests have annexed our online experiences, fighting desperately for our attention as they seek to monetize every available aspect of our lives

four walls (the ballad of perry smith) - well this one is about uh. perry smith. who was charged with the death penalty for killing 4 people in the late 50's. but it's less directly about him and more a discussion of the morality of the death penalty and capital punishment

snakes - burgeoning anxieties and the impulse to turn to easy outs, like ignorance or alcoholism, to escape the world's global problems

if you want some pop culture sprinkled on top:

icarus - greek mythology. i like this one because it addresses something that i feel isn't addressed enough in discussions of this myth, which is that icarus is a very young lad. less about the pride of the fall, and more about the inherent tragedy of that.

laura palmer - the whole song is a david lynch shoutout. i've never seen twin peaks myself but the song still slaps.

daniel in the den - christian mythology. discusses the biblical tale of daniel in the lion's den and links that up to themes of betrayal and family.

poet - this one's a double feature, referencing both william shakespeare's sonnet 18 and edmund spencer's sonnet 75. also one of my favorites.

send them off! - this is another one of my favorites of theirs. it's also been described by dan as "othello meets the exorcist" and it very much delivers there

if you want something uplifting:

joy - while bastille (understandably) has a bit of reputation as a band that makes sad music about sad things, they've definitely got some happier songs in their catalogue. pun intended cha ching. this one's one of their more straightforwardly happy tunes

survivin' - this was a song they wrote while they were touring and then felt weird about releasing once the panini hit because it felt a bit on the nose. they ended up releasing it anyway and i am so glad they did cause it's a mood

act of kindness - the "happy" part here is debatable but i'm gonna include it anyway. it’s when someone does something nice for you and that impulse Changes you way down deep you know???

warmth - one of those "the world's going to shit but at least we have each other" kinds of tunes

the anchor - one of those "the world's going to shit but you're the one fucking thing that's still keeping me here" kinds of tunes

give me the future - their latest single as of this writing and one of the more optimistic tracks in their catalogue imo! it's yearning, but it's also with a genuine hope for the future.

and LASTLY. because im going to take every chance i can to plug this band. im going to throw some collabs and covers at you because there's one thing this band does SUPER well and it's collabs and covers.

of the night - this is the big one. it mashes up rhythm of the night by corona and rhythm is a dancer by SNAP! and it's so good they still do this one live and it goes off every time.

no angels - a mashup of "no scrubs" by TLC and "angels" by the xx, poured into a strangely mournful tune with clips from the hitchcock movie psycho. doesn't sound like it should work but it does. kinda really does.

torn apart - with GRADES and lizzo no less!!! it's got two parts but they're both excellent listen to them both

weapon - collab with angel haze, dan priddy, and F*U*G*Z and one of my absolute favorites

remains - remix of their song "skulls" but featuring rag'n'bone man and skunk anansie that adds an entire new dimension to the song, really fucking excellent

old town road mashup - lil nas x's old town road meets lizzo's good as hell meets radiohead's talk show host meets talking heads' road to nowhere meets the osmond's crazy horse. "what the fuck that shouldn't work" i KNOW and yet here it is!! BLATANTLY BANGING!!!

we can't stop - one of the few times dan smith subtly changes the lyrics of the song he's covering (most of the time he opts to keep the original pronouns and the like, which is very nice to see). anyway this one mixes miley cyrus's we can't stop with eminem's lose yourself and billy ray cyrus's achy breaky heart. and also the lion king's i just can't wait to be king is there. yes i know it sounds batshit especially because the whole thing is surprisingly melodic and heartfelt and you know what it works.

anyone but me x nightmares - mashing up joy crookes' anyone but me with easy life's nightmares and absolutely one of my favorites.

bad guy mashup - how many songs can they include with the word "bad" in the title? we've got bad guy (billie eilish), bad decisions (bastille), bad romance (lady gaga), and bad blood (taylor swift). bastille even has a song called bad blood and they didnt use it. they used taylor swift's version. also the distinctive guitar riff from dick dale's misirlou is there.

somebody mashup - how many songs can they include with the word "some" in the title? someone like you (adele), somebody told me (the killers), somebody to love (queen), use somebody (kings of leon), and someone you loved (lewis capaldi). seriously these guys take mashups to a new level.

final song - this is a cover of MØ's final song. it also adds in craig david's 7 days and, impossibly enough, europe's final countdown. how does it work. how.

ALL RIGHT. THATS ALL IVE GOT IN ME. HOPE THIS HELPED ANON AND IM SORRY IF THIS IS TOO MUCH

#askin hours #anon #bastille #ill put this in the bastille tag why not #this is predominantly a fall out boy blog but if any bastille bloggers are out there....all like 20 of you....#i see the work u do in this fandom and i love u for it

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