#hate to keep putting this on everyone's dash but i keep getting informed by people in the notes of stuff i didnt know before

[dillyt]

Okay, another update, a lot of people are saying that novavax is actually the best vaccine to get. The downside is that novavax has been delayed by FDA approval of their new XBB variant vaccine and it is uncertain when they will be shipped out, so if you can afford to wait a week or two (maybe longer even) and really want novavax go ahead. If you can't afford to wait, then just keep calling your local pharmacies to see if they have the updated vaccine and make whatever choice in vaccine you feel is best for you and the people around you. Frustratingly, a lot of pharmacies haven't gotten their shipments of updated vaccines and don't know when they are getting them. The only way to really be certain you are getting the updated vaccine that protects against newer variants and not the older bivalent vaccines is to call, since vaccines.gov turned out to not be as reliable as I thought it was going to be. Bottom line is that covid is getting bad again, and everyone needs to mask up and get vaccinated with the updated vaccine as soon as possible.

Great news for uninsured adults in the USA who want a COVID-19 booster! It now appears that ALL CVS locations are now active participants in the Bridge Access Program. The Bridge Access Program gives out free Covid-19 vaccinations to 18+ adults who otherwise can't afford one, so if you have a CVS near you, please go get one! For others who don't have a CVS near them, please go to vaccines.gov, click on "Find Covid-19 vaccines", fill out which vaccines you prefer (you can mix different vaccines if you have to so i reccomend just marking all of them for the age groups you need), and when the next page loads mark the "Bridge Access Program Participant" option to see only locations that are Bridge Access Program participants. Hopefully, other places that aren't CVS will start participating soon, so just check back every so often to see if there are any updates. The CDC Bridge Access Program website also has more details on what locations will be participating, but only CVS is appearing as an active participant on the vaccines.gov location finder at the moment.

[oddeyecir-cle]

 ✶ ˖  ࣪  📹 .  ぅ

lee donghyuck enemies to lovers fic ideas (all fics are haechan × reader)

haechan who is your rival coworker + secretly deadpool

for the sake of this story, lets assume deadpool does hide his identity. he works at a tech company and is constantly beefing with his coworker that he's lowkey attracted to. and the plot could maybe be something like you accidentally finding out his identity and then using that information to slightly/ kind of/ in a non-toxic way blackmail him. eg: making him run errands for you, asking to tag along on his quests as deadpool. then the pair gets closer through all the time they spend together etc etc.

✶ note : hyuck HAS to be the sassiest, funniest, most sarcastic, cocky human being ever. also include some spidermark maybe

haechan as the prince of the neighbouring kingdom

historical au. very basic ik but hear me out. your kingdom's glory and power is gradually draining and it's threatened by multiple rivaling kingdoms. that is when your mother, the queen, tells you there is no choice but to turn to hyuck's kingdom for help. you hate the idea but you know everyone's counting on you so you go through with it anyways. (this is historical so there could be a very cool scene of the reader riding on a horse in battle armour to neighbouring kingdom's palace themself but whatever). they're good, kind people so they agree to help you. they send over a part of their military along with some weapons and of course haechan himself, their most prized possession who, like you, is skilled with a sword and is a wise leader. there's lots of quarrels between the both of you when it comes to the topic of which one has more power over the other and about who should be leading the troops. but you soon put your animosity aside when you realize that you have to work as a team to win. (insert dramatic battle sequence with swords and arrows flying around. at one point, you and haechan lock eyes and suddenly he drops to the ground. the world starts to blur around you when you realize he's been stabbed in his back. you frantically rush to his aid but he falls limp in your arms. its now upto the writer to kill him there itself and end the story. very angsty, i love. or they could also save him somehow and give main characters the happy ending they deserve).

 ✶ note : sloooooowwwww buuuurn. i mean this should be a long ass series with 7k+ words per chapter. should be so heavy on the angst and the hate that it makes you wonder if they do actually end up loving each other in the end. please include sword fighting scenes with sexual tension i beg you. (im big on bollywood, can u tell).

haechan as a stranger/ tour guide you meet on a family trip

you've just gotten out of a 3 year long relationship after your boyfriend cheated on you with your best friend. things get worse when your family, unaware of your breakup, forces you on a 2 week trip to *insert destination of choice" . here you meet the annoying, sarcastic, a-little-too-happy-for-his-own-good donghyuck. he is with the group your family is touring with (him being the tour guide is a pretty cute plot too but it could kind of complicate things later) and instantly wins everyone over with his charm, except you of course. in classic hyuck fashion, he tries to keep getting your attention and eventually succeeds. his company helps ease the pain of the heartbreak he didn't even know about. its bittersweet when it's time to part ways. you realise after you come back to your college dorm that you never exchanged phone numbers and you fail to find him on social media as well. but fate has strange ways of bringing people together. which is why you cant stop smiling when crash into a certain someone during a regular grocery run.

✶ note : more on the fluff and less on the angst for this one. and maybe a dash of slice of life as well.

haechan as captain of the football team.

there is no actual plot for this other than the fact that you're a cheerleader and also his academic rival (there is no trope i love more than this). my vision for this is very 2000s romcom. ik this isn't a lot to work with but there could be some sub trope like fake dating mostly.

✶ note: nothing much just make it cute

+i have a few more ideas, will probably make a part 2

++if in the future, by some miracle, people do find these interesting enough to use, please dont forget to credit me!!

[strawberrystepmom]

hello kendall !!! i hope you don’t mind me dropping by to visit 🥹🌸 i’ve been enjoying seeing you talk about dante on dash even if i am not too familiar with him or the fandom— but i was wondering if you have a list of your current fav characters? i am just very curious and love hearing about people’s favs— even your top 5 or 10 that have been occupying your mind and what made you fall for them if you’re comfortable giving more information!

💗 i hope you have a delightful wednesday ^^;

hi vana <33333333 i hope your wednesday has been the loveliest! i hope the sun is shining! i hope the birds have chirped! i hope you have enjoyed something very tasty and memorable!

my list of favs is many and long im crying but the usual suspects are:

senku ishigami from dr. stone - i have a love/hate relationship with him most of the time but it's only because i appreciate him so deeply LMAFOEIJFLSKJF im so ungrateful. i originally fell for him bc i love nerds and will fuck nerds until the day i die. i appreciate his big heart even though he keeps things close to his chest and the idea of real feelings makes him wanna gag. something will always be so dear to me about a man that is ill behaved with a big heart.

i have several au's with senku but the main one diverges from the canon storyline and he and his friends end up at a settlement in california set up by me and my friends. my si/oc is an agriculture expert and he and i go back and forth on science, life, sociology, the future all the time.

gen narumi from kaiju number 8 - my skrunkle cat.........where do i even begin? he enchanted me from the minute he started being unhinged for zero reason. like he's wound SO tight despite appearing as someone kind of laid back and relaxed and i think about it so often. a capricorn nightmare aka my day dream. my si/oc in this universe is a seismologist and we date online for a very long time before it becomes a real life thing. i also have a couple of au's with him - knight/princess ofc and omegaverse.

satoru gojo from jjk - i cried every day for three months just thinking about him and had to really figure out what that was all about. man of all time. even talking about him makes me feel like im literally stripping naked for you guys to see so i have to stop myself bc he makes me crazy and unwell. my oc/si in that universe is a teacher who went to school with him in nanami's class. there is a million years of drama and like 10 straight years of being off and on but yeah. it's a lot.

yami sukehiro from black clover - i watched black clover for the first time this summer and fell so disgustingly hard for this man i dont think i've ever looked so dumb in all my life. he's big, he's brash, he's Daddy energy embodied and he drives me nuts. my si/oc in that universe is a noblewoman who works as a spymaster for the wizard king and yami and i secretly sleep together because im horny, unmarried, and wanna "practice" to be a good wife. little did i know that would be the man im being a good wife for. life comes at you fast!

and ykw since we mentioned him let's give a shout out to mr. may cry himself...

dante from devil may cry - idk what the fuck has possessed me but the minute i saw this man i said man that sucks bc he's for me. i denied him for months (i did this with gojo too everyone will tell u) and was like im not getting into this bc i know I KNOWWWWW and i was warned and here we are.

what i love about dante is that he is a true believer in good. despite how shitty his life is, despite all the trauma and horrors he has been put through, he believes in people. he believes in love. he's compassionate and protective and silly and sure of himself and wiuehgwaioejfalwjf that's cat nip to this lil kitty kitty. like i didn't wanna speak too soon and sound insane but he is kind of soloing the rest of my harem bc tbf he's everything i like about the rest of them with huge arms and pecs to boot. i am just a woman vana.

[limepigeon]

Fallen Hero Fanzine 2024 - Info and Theme Poll

All info is under the cut since I don't want to clutter your dash too much! EDIT: Tumblr hates multiple choices for Polls apparently, you can vote but also write in replies (or send anonymous through dm, but please don't send multiple of the same option to get what you want, let's keep it fair!) if you want to vote for more than one option! (Sorry for the inconvenience!)

Hi everyone!

Since I got the feedback on the interest check for a possible Fallen Hero Fanzine it seems like we have some interest and I’ve been looking into various ways we could do this. As I’m big on collaboration and everyone getting a say, I was thinking that deciding on a theme for the zine could be our first collaborative step.

I’ve made a poll (found further down in this post) with 7 options for you to vote on. Descriptions/explanations are found right below the poll so make sure to read those before casting your vote. We’re keeping this first zine sfw, please keep that in mind if suggesting themes of your own. Voting doesn’t tie you to contributing to the zine.

Jumping into something headfirst without knowing what you’ll find on the other side is scary, that’s why I’ve written a short list of what I have in mind for this zine.

The zine will be 100% free and non-profit, this also means no compensation for the contributors. Theme: TBD through majority vote Number of contributors: Max 30 (I would love to have more but, unless someone can help me with admin stuff, I think that’s my limit for how much organising and planning I can do on my own). Rating: SFW. Innuendos, cursing, violence and the like is okay but not straight up sex. Format: Digital/e-zine, with permission to print at home for personal use only. I will put together a bonus version made for easy to print at home, with instructions for how to assemble it. Media types allowed: Any visual media suited for print as long as it’s your own (e.g. illustrations, sketches, photography, collages, short comics, cosplay etc). Keep in mind that if you make a collage or mood board, all pictures must be your own (or have the rights to). Any writing as long as it’s your own (e.g. short stories, poetry, analyses, personal anecdotes etc). Pages in zine per contributor: 2. Time frame and deadlines: TBD but I plan on us having it finished around September/October of 2024, with some reservations.

I hope this has been informative so far, if you have questions you can either reply to this post (so everyone else can see the question and reply), or dm me if you want to be anonymous.

Now, let’s get to voting on a theme! Descriptions for themes under the poll.

Nemesis - More action focused, showdowns, heroes and villains battling it out in their suits! Some softer moments could fit in here as well but if too many opt towards it I might steer some of the submissions to make sure the zine in whole stays on theme. Coming Home - New beginnings, finding your place. It could be sweet and cozy, finding friends, or stepping into your own skin for the first time. Interpret as you like, but the main focus should be on the concept of “home”, whatever that means to you or the characters you choose to portray. Los Diablos - Snippets and snapshots from the city and lives you are sworn to protect or destroy. HG’s lair, Herald’s apartment, or a sewer (sorry, secret base), as well as the people found in these places. Nightmares - The bad vibes (tm) one. The Heartbreak Incident, decanting, paranoia, all the nasty bits you don’t want people to find. This one is open to more possible body horror than the other themes. Ship specific - Pick this one if you want a more romance focused theme, and specify in replies which characters you’d want in centre. Please write Ship Theme before the characters in your reply. I have another idea! - Got an idea for a theme that isn’t in the poll? Pick this one and specify in replies what it is! Please specify even if someone has the same idea, or close to, as you. Please write Theme Suggestion before the theme in your reply. No theme - Don’t feel like sticking to a theme? Want to create an amalgamation of everyone’s mind stuff without any limits or guidelines? This choice is for you.

[nyaagolor]

A genuinely shocking amnt of people said they wanted to see my “Apollo backstory but it’s exclusively based on AA4” so huzzah! Self-indulgence on main! It’s under the readmore because I don’t wanna clog anyone’s dash :)

Everything starts with Thalassa because of course it does. She’s part of the Granmarye Troupe but kinda Hates It. Her father gives her very little autonomy, and she feels like they’re treating her more as an asset or employee than family. She's good at putting on a brave face but she has very little autonomy there and is completely miserable, so she sneaks out to meet with the audience sometimes to get a taste of freedom. It’s on one of these little trips that she meets Jove, who she quickly falls in love with. They continue to meet in secret, and Thalassa’s resentment for the troupe only grows. The day she turns 18, she runs away to go elope with him, not leaving a note or any indication of where she’s gone

The two of them are happily married for a year and have a child, but Jove dies in an accident (unrelated to Kuhrain in this version) only a year into their marriage. Thalassa, now a 19 year old single mom with no money and no documents, realizes the only person who can help her now is the last person she wants to see. Desperate, she calls Magnifi, who agrees to help her IF she gives up the kid and comes back to the troupe. He thinks if she still has an attachment to the child she’ll try and run away again as soon as she can (and he’s right!). Thalassa gives Apollo to the orphanage with one of her bracelets and secretly tries to keep track of him— she does plan on coming back for him as soon as she can, Magnifi be damned

Magnifi, knowing that both Zak and Valant are in love with his daughter, actively encourages the both of them to pursue her, hoping one of them will get her to fall in love and give her a reason not to leave the troupe. Zak is the one who ends up succeeding. They have Trucy together and things immediately take a turn for the worse

Thalassa immediately gets very depressed after having Trucy and nothing seems to cheer her up. She can’t stop thinking about being forced to give up her first child and the life she lost and nothing Zak does seems to help. Eventually, Magnifi steps in and says that she needs to get over it and get back to performing. To everyone’s surprise, Thalassa agrees without protest

This is when the “accident” happens. Air quotes here because surprise! It was not an accident at all. Thalassa was tired, desperate, and wanting nothing more than to go scorched earth on the entirety of Troupe Granmarye, so she loaded the gun improperly on purpose in hopes that the aftermath and scandal will bring the troupe down with her. She somehow survives, but only Magnifi knows. Not wanting news of it to escape and seeing an opportunity to hold this over Zak and Valant’s heads, he ships his amnesiac daughter off to Borgnia and tries to wipe his hands of the whole thing

While clearing through Thalassa’s things, Magnifi finds all of the information on Apollo and Jove, which he shows to Zak. Zak, who didn’t know about Apollo, feels wildly hurt by it all. He ends up projecting a lot of his feelings onto Trucy— he still loves her but becomes more distant because he’s grieving Thalassa’s death and “betrayal”

This is how Zak knows about Apollo and why he tells Phoenix about it. Phoenix does try to find Apollo as soon as he learns about him, HOWEVER, Apollo is trans and all of Thalassa’s documents have his deadname on them so they can’t be used to track him down. (By the time Phoenix realizes Apollo is the kid he’s been looking for ((via the bracelet)) he’s already broken Apollo’s trust enough that he doesn’t feel like he can safely drop that truth bomb without scaring him away. By the time Apollo DOES come to trust Phoenix, Thalassa has her memories back, at which point Phoenix feels it’s her truth to tell). Anyway.

Trucy’s story is effectively identical to canon so I don’t have much to say about that

While in the orphanage, Apollo decides he wants to be a lawyer bc he hears about Phoenix (specifically the whole thing about sticking up for people with no one on their side). He goes thru the lawyer track in HS bc that’s a canon thing in AA apparently and tests into a special fast track law program so he can save as much money on tuition as possible

Apollo works his ass off, he has a ton of jobs and works indexing night shifts for the courthouse. Everyone starts to know who he is bc he works every law related job he can no matter how miserable. This is how Kristoph finds out about him

He works all thru law school but basically all of his money goes to tuition so he goes between shitty apartments and crashing at the courthouse / work when he runs out of rent money. This is the OTHER reason everyone knows who he is and how kristoph finds out about him— he’s always loitering around the courthouse. He makes a name for himself as a hard worker, being fast + thorough with paperwork, and having an excellent eye for detail

During internship hunting season, Kristoph approaches Apollo— he greatly values a dedicated hard worker like Apollo and thinks Apollo’s abysmal financials are good leverage for manipulation. I hc that Kristoph specializes in fraud cases, so Apollo’s talents are extremely relevant to Kristoph’s interests. Kristoph’s firm is only himself because of all the illegal shit he does (less eyes less chance of being caught) so he gambles on taking in Apollo. He ends up personally fixing up Apollo’s credit score, ensuring he has proper documents, and gets him set up with a decent paycheck so he can start to develop a savings account. Apollo decides he would die for him

This continues until Kristoph plays a bad hand— he intends on having Apollo defend Phoenix in the hopes that he’ll lose so he can hang the resulting verdict over Apollo’s head to manipulate him. Turnabout Trump happens and Apollo ends up back where he started, broke and with less trust in others than he had before (which is saying a lot). During his internship with Kristoph he managed to get together a tiny rainy day fund and even started to save up for top surgery, but all that money has to be used to cover rent while he’s jobless bc of the Turnabout Trump aftermath. It’s when the money finally runs out that he answers Trucy’s phone call and agrees to work for the WAA

Canon proceeds as normal, but Apollo has extra paranoia because he’s worried all the money and documents and credit that Kristoph gave him were faked. Also, Thalassa doesn't tell Trucy and Apollo about the whole Thing because part of that would be admitting the role she played in how their lives turned out and she is not quite ready to face her demons yet

[maxcuntstappen]

hey hey, ik i could've asked this from anyone, but i wanted someone 'neutral' to answer this (+ you seem sweet <3), but as someone who is relatively new to the fandom (i need to catch up on my lore, though i think i'm almost there), and has absolutely nothing against carlos, wym explaining to me why some people seem to absolutely hate him, like with a passion please? (ty<3)

I ALSO ABSOLUTELY ABSOLUTELY ADORE YOUR FICS MWAHH <<33

hello!! first of all, im glad u think im sweet n neutral enough to approach. rn, i think that is my ideal vibe for myself.

the hate for carlos increased significantly after his move to ferrari, which put him in direct competition with Charles.

there was definitely not a preferred driver in the situation, despite charles having been with Ferrari for years, and this didn't sit right for many people.

i think shit really hit the fan in Silverstone 2022 where Ferrari - stupidly, oh god so stupidly - sacrificed Charles' race (who was in contention for winning the championship) for carlos to get his first win.

carlos has also ignored team orders in the past. he complains a lot if he's asked to switch cars on track with charles, or any such thing. as opposed to charles who people believe that just does it and gets a move on. this has also given people the perception that carlos isn't a team player.

some other things that ella mentioned that i didn't even think of;

carlos whines on the radio too much, saying that he is faster than charles, doing quicker lap times, and that he should be allowed to pass. there have often been times where he's cooked the tyres in the process of putting in faster times than charles so even if they do swap track positions, it's been for nought.

(this also adds to the anti-team player thing cause it does sometimes seem that carlos is always focused on being better than charles than how to best monopolise the situation to benefit the team as a whole)

he entertains ties to right wing politicians in spain (which considering how much MAGA comes up for logan, it's surprising how this isn't as known information)

and something i hear so often when it comes to carlos,

his vibe is off.

i really dont know if this helped better understand people's hatred for carlos. he is surprisingly unpopular amongst my friends' too. but not everyone can like all drivers on the grid (esp. with each of them having their varied range of red flags). and they shouldn't feel the need to either!

i just wish people would use the anti tags and keep their complaints off the main tags so that the people who are fans don't have to come across it. but that seems like a utopian concept.

so i just curate the hell out of my dash instead.

[shadowmaat]

Biases and belief

I follow T Kingfisher over on Bluesky. So much fun stuff! Wonderful author. Excellent additional nerdery things. Unfortunately, she's become a target for rage trolls because of her very reasonable stance on the recent bombshell in the bookworld.

Look. Everyone knows that when a woman comes forward with allegations about a man regarding SA, it's a good idea to believe her. Chances are that she wouldn't put herself through the shitscape of public scrutiny if something hadn't happened. While there are outliers who only do it for attention or to try and get back at someone, generally speaking there's every chance she's telling the truth.

There is, however, a difference between speaking up on your own, speaking to a credible news source, and going to a hate group with a grudge against the target of those allegations. This doesn't make anything that happened less true, but it's going to vastly alter how the news is perceived by the general public.

The issue is further complicated by a lot of people having a very deep hatred of the accused for various reasons. They are highly motivated to believe the allegations because it "proves" they were right to hate him. That's the whole "confirmation bias" issue and leads people to believe things without fact checking because you're already inclined to believe the worst about someone.

Personally? I've enjoyed a lot of the author's stuff, but I wouldn't consider myself a fan and I don't follow him on any social media sites (though I've reblogged stuff that crossed my dash). I've also defended him in the past when I felt fans were being unreasonable in their expectations of him.

When I heard the news I was inclined to believe it. Because, as stated above, when a woman (or women in this case) come forward, chances are there's truth in what they say. I've also heard questionable things about him before. And, generally, I think men steeped in popularity and with certain levels of money and power are more likely to take advantage of women knowing that they can get away with it.

Then I learned that the source of the news- the ONLY source of the news- was unreliable, heavily biased, and inclined to lie and/or misrepresent information. This is less than ideal because you have "believe women" coming up against "don't trust liars with a grudge."

"Legitimate" news sources have been reporting on the allegations, but every single one of them has cited the same questionable source. This is, again, less than ideal, and I really wish that news agencies cared more about truth than page hits. I wish that they'd make an effort to verify and confirm info themselves rather than leaving it at "so-and-so reported" and pretending that was good enough.

And this is where Ursula (T Kingfisher) has run into trouble. She's stated over and over that it isn't that she disbelieves the women, but that she doesn't find the source credible and that there's no way to confirm the accusers actually exist. I can see how that would be tricky given that victims have a right to a certain amount of anonymity in cases like this, but also, how do you prove they exist?

Ursula has faced a LOT of angry dogpiling, telling her to shut up, demanding she delete her posts/account, and accusing her of being a SA apologist who refuses to believe women. (And probably worse stuff I'm not seeing on account of her blocking/ignoring the really terrible ones). It isn't true, but every time she tries to explain that people just get angrier and keep ignoring her words in favor of raging at her for what they believe she said. If it's exhausting to watch I can't even imagine how it feels to be the target of so much misguided anger like that.

As for me, like Ursula, I'm still inclined to believe the allegations, but it'd be really damn helpful if an independent and less biased source could confirm the details. Maybe even police reports? A court filing? A court filing would really cement the issue, and I know they have provisions in place (at least in the US) to protect identities exactly for cases like this.

Anyway, my points are:

Ursula did nothing wrong and is, in fact, right to want a better source.

Believe women.

Question unreliable sources.

Beware of confirmation bias.

Don't fall for the fallacy that all men are scum.

Remember that some men ARE scum, even if they're your faves.

Read. Carefully.

Don't attack someone when you aren't in possession of all the facts.

Stop assuming the worst out of every conversation you start with someone.

You can believe women and still want a credible source of information.

Also, as an addendum, just because That Author hasn't responded to the allegations doesn't make them true. It means he's listening to his lawyer while the situation is investigated.

[fandom-imagination-ss]

A

part 2 by request of Derek sacrificing himself to save you 

Imagine: Derek asking your dad for your hand and then Asking you Finally to marry him after years of waiting. 

Parrish for the Win, when Derek almost stupidly sacrificed himself to save everyone and He was pushing Scott away from the Big bad. Parrish took care of burning the MF alive. Eli was relieved that his Dad was safe. you. you were furious Derek almost left, Eli and you. Not the romantic reunion Derek expected when you walked over and hit him in the face when everything was done. it didn’t hurt it. not with his thick Skull and being a werewolf, you knew logically it wouldn’t hurt him but you were furious at him. Everyone was shocked,   you instantly groaned out in pain feeling a snap in your hand.  Derek heard the Snap as Scott dashed over taking the pain away as you screamed at Derek about being reckless and how he couldn’t Die or at Least not stupidly Sacrifice himself. 

you were taken by the Sheriff to the hospital while Eli went with you. you as you both sat getting a cast put on your broken wrist. you broke your wrist in two different places pouching Derek in the face. and he barely flinched. you were slightly impressed. at how thick his skull is to not even cry out in pain.  while you were broken. Eli after the relief of being happy that he’s Dad was Safe and alive was now pissed he almost ruined Everything. Derek came to the hospital but was waiting out in the waiting room. He knew he screwed up. he wasn’t going to ask for forgiveness he was going to protect his family. and there is nothing more important than his family. And if something like that happened again he would do it again. you knew what sort of guy Derek was. it shouldn’t be shocking that he would do anything possible to keep you and Eli safe! but as he waited in the waiting room. he could Smell the frustration and anger coming off you. and you were deep in the hospital. He knew he wasn’t in the wrong. but he also knew. he never smelt you this angry at him before. Or this angry period. and in the years of knowing you. he realized.. whatever logical stance he had. he knew when you walked out. He would have to wait until you were calm and level-headed before informing the love of his life. that he didn’t feel sorry or regretted trying to keep her and Eli Safe. Not tonight. Tonight if Derek Slept in the same bed as you. it would be a miracle he was expecting the sofa. 

you walked out with Eli as Derek noticed your hand. wrapped up. he was stunned. he figured it was sprained but broken? you walked over to him as you spoke, “I broke my wrist in two different spots.. how’s your face?”

“Fine... you didn’t hurt me.” you groaned at that. rationally yo didn’t want to of hurt him. but a slight pain! especially since you broke your wrist on his stupid lovely face! 

“Let’s go home.” 

you just stated as you got into Derek’s Truck he helped you up. as you sat quietly. in the passenger seat as Eli was quiet. he didn’t know how to smell emotions yet but he could feel the anger radiating off you as you were quiet. as Derek drove.. the 15-minute drive in silence home was tortured. you got inside and you ordered takeout as you sat on the sofa. as Eli bailed. he ran to his room. to be out of the danger zone as Derek walked over as he sat on the coffee table as he sat down you snapped, “you WERE GOING TO LEAVE US!” 

“i was trying to protect the two people who mean more to me than my own life! I was  trying to keep you safe!” 

“hang safety! i want you! we need you! you can’t just stupidly sacrifice yourself! you are our world! do you think it’s one sided? that you can just protect and love us and we wouldn’t what? survive without you? I wouldn’t! Derek! you are the love of my life! you can’t go form asking me to marry you to then Stupidly going to sacrifice you for Scott? SCOTT?! Scott SUCKS! I mean- I dont hate Scott. he’s a great friend but I would rather him Die than you!” 

Derek knew you didn’t really mean that. you were great friends with Scott and Alison? you were best friends in school. Derek didn’t take that to heart but he also knew. you were fiercely loyal and protective of the people you love. you only ever had just you and your dad. and he knew you thought and loved him dearly. and that it took a long time for him to gain your full trust and your heart. and he knew. if the world ever threatens him or Eli. you would have the match lite and you would Burn the world for them. Derek realized at that moment if it was between Saving all his friends. and you had to choose to another sacrifice Him or Scott. you wouldn’t even think about it. you would save Derek. and hang anyone who said you choose wrong. 

“I wasn’t going to yet that bastard harm you or Eli! your my world! you are my lungs.. to breath Y/n! I was just thinkin about saving and protecting you and Eli! I don’t regret my decision I would do it again.” you groaned as he spoke, ‘Y/n. you know the sort of man i am. I protect the ones i love. you have known that about me since we met. you both were in danger and i needed to protect you.” 

“you didn’t use your thick Skull! what if you died Derek!” you snarled. getting up as you spoke, ‘how- How would Me and Eli?- Eli has already Lost a mom! he can’t lose he’s Dad!” 

“you know Eli considers you  he’s mom. this isn’t about Eli” 

“but it is! because Eli is at that point in his life. he needs his Dad! he needs you to show him how to be a good man!” “if i died you could easily do it. I trust you completely with Eli!” 

‘I don’t! I make very questionable stupid mistakes daily. and you’re the voice of reason! Derek! you can’t- you can’t Die. It’s unexpectable and If you pull that stunt again! I’ll- Ill do something drastic!”  

Derek sighed heavily rubbing his face as the door rang as you walked over to get your and Elis dinner as Derek was starving as you called Eli to get his food. he appeared just enough to grab and disappear as you pulled out your burger. Derek walked over to the empty bag asking for his food. 

“Im saving you from the greasy Food! im sacrificing myself for your heath.” 

he rolled his eyes going to the fridge and pulling out leftovers as you watched him as you spoke, “I’m not saying I won’t marry you.” he looked over at you stunned as you held your burger in both hands as you spoke “but right Now - Right now.. for at least a week. I need to think. I love you completely but I will not get engaged to you and then have the biggest fight we have ever had. our story deserves better than that.” 

he nodded his head, ‘good because I didn’t ask.” 

“Good!” 

you went to bed. after dinner. when it was ten pm. you walked out to the living room to see Derek stretched out on the sofa. he took up the entire sofa as you  noticed the blankets as you spoke, “why aren’t you in bed?” he looked over at you stunned, “I’m allowed On the bed?’ 

you crossed your arms tightly as you spoke, ‘Yes. come on- we fought before and I never sent you to the sofa.” 

“This is a big fight.” 

you calmed down. Derek could smell it and see it. you were exhausted but you weren’t Furious anymore. “I get what you did.. and If- If I was in the same position.. I would Do the same thing... that being said. you do that again. and I’ll bring you back to life! to kill you myself! you can’t Leave us! in some heroic brave matter! I dont want that! I want forever with you! “ Derek rubbed his face, “I want that too. you know I do!” 

nodding your head. you held your arms tightly, “good. so it’s settled! forever is the minimal sentence!” 

“But if you and Eli are in danger.” 

“We fight and we survive together!”

Derek realized he wouldn’t win this battle. so he nodded his head saying okay. as you both went to bed. as the morning arrived. you got ready for work as Derek spoke ‘let’s go on a date.”

you smiled nodding your head, ‘that be great.. Oh.. before date night. I and Eli have been talking.” 

Derek intensely tensed up at that. whatever you thought of. was Not going to be good. he could already see the evil twinkle in your eyes as you spoke, “Before you ask for my hand again. I’m going to need you to   Ask for permission.’ 

Derek looked over at his Son as he spoke, “from Eli? I just assumed he would be happy- wouldn’t you be?” 

Eli chuckled nodding his head, “yea I would love it. but It’s not me you need permission from.” Derek looked back at you as you spoke, “my Dad.”

Derek almost fell off the barstool hearing that. your dad Hated him! 

Derek asked you a long time ago about your preference of if he should ask permission from your dad. and you said “if you had a good relationship with him. I would love it.. but he-.. so so with you.” 

which Derek always took that he got a pass from asking. but now. you spoke, “Eli and I both agree. this will be best.” 

“What How ?” 

Derek looked at his son. he’s Son who betrayed him to be on your side. Eli spoke, “I think it would be good for you to work a bit harder on your relationship with Coach. I mean he’s family. And you’re all about family. and it is good for you and him to bond over this.” you smiled wrapping your arms around Eli kissing his cheek, “excellent Point! it would be a great bonding experience! come on I’ll take you to school. while your dad. preps on what he will say to  my dad!” 

“this is evil” Derek grumbled. you just chuckled patting his back. “So is trying to abandon us!” 

“Saving you isn’t abandoning you!” 

“Asking you to spend time with my father isn’t cruel! either!” you stated as Derek spoke up, ‘Eli! You suppose to be on my side!” 

Eli grabbed his bag fast as he spoke, ‘no way! im on mom’s side.” you smiled beamingly at Derek to that response where you then stuck your tongue out. before stating. “I’m the favorite expect it.” and left. 

Derek Knew he wasn’t your dad’s favorite person, by the fact that when you go off to have dinner with him. Coach always wants eli. and he was just a passing person. who didn’t need to be there. and he always called Derek “Joe.” it’s been years and he doesn’t remember  Derek's name. Derek sighed going to the school to talk to Coach. he was walking in the  gym as Derek spoke, ‘Coach.” 

even after all this time Derek wouldn’t dare call him by he’s first name. you call him “Dad’ but everyone else in the world called him coach. Coach turned seeing him as he grumbled greatly as he spoke, “what you doing here Blain?” 

“Derek- and I wanted to. ask for your permission.” 

“For what?” he turned to look at Derek as Derek took a deep breath as he spoke, ‘Y/N is already a member of my family.. i want- i want to make it official and ask her to marry me.. But she wants to get your permission first.” 

 Coach smiled widely, ‘you must of screwed up pretty bad. Y/N doesn’t care about that barbaric old tradition. you must of screwed up bad buddy.” Derek sighed heavily lowering his head. he should of realized this wasn’t going to be a quick conversation. Coach chuckled loudly as he spoke, ‘no!’ 

“No one could Love her more, and I can provide for her and I love Her!” 

“Apart of me wanting to ask, the other part says knowing will only make it worst. and it has to be pretty bad if she’s making you come here. for my blessing! th

“Coach if you just-” Derek was interrupted by the bell and forced to leave he returned a few hours later for Eli’s game as he tried again to ask for your hand. he arrived outside the locker room waiting for Coach to come out as he heard him quoting a movie. the Speech from Independence day. Derek knew that was your favorite move. you make him sit thru it every fourth of July and you and Eli have had heated debuts over the second movie. Coach walked out as Derek stepped forward. Coach cursed under their breath as he Derek spoke, “Coach Hi- I just- Please give me your blessing.” 

“Im going to make this So profoundly difficult. I’m not even sure you will Get it. you will probably Die before you get it! GREENBERG! NO!” Coach screamed chasing after Jr Greenberg. the day that Kid joined the school was the First time Coach thought about retiring. he looked back at his daughter’s boy toy as he spoke, ‘never you hear! Pretty boy! Never!” 

Derek wasn’t sure why he wasn’t good enough for you. He was wealthy, and respected in the community he helps with the police investigations he owned a house and a business.it was after the game as Derek walked over to Coach who sighed heavily hoping he left already. 

“why aren’t I good enough for Y/N?” 

Coach crossed his arms tightly to himself, and everyone around them moved on as Coach spoke, “I don’t appreciate that you were Dating my daughter when she was a teenager.” 

Derek’s jaw fell, “” Coach- I wasn’t- we didn’t get together until she was 20- She had a massive crush on me but I swear I didn’t touch her!” 

Coach stared at him unconvinced. Derek stepped forward as he spoke, “I left for three years to make sure- I didn’t do anything stupid I swear. I would never disgrace Y/N that way. I love Her I have since I first met her but I kept my distance.” 

Coach nodded his head as he spoke, “then Why the Hell did it take you until Now to ask her to marry you? is she pregnant.” 

Derek shook his head as Coach dashed off. and Derek Followed. 

you knew that your dad would take a lot of convincing you were his entire world. And he hated Derek. you weren’t sure why. Derek’s great. he’s So much tamer and calms now vs hot head. pouch first asks later Derek he was when you were a teenager. two weeks. 

you were coming home after work. exhausted. working in a high school full of hormonal teenagers. and watching Derek Dashing around following your dad. it was entertaining seeing the Famous Derek Hale scrambling to get permission from Coach. But after two weeks. you couldn’t believe he hasn’t gotten it yet. what did your dad see in Derek that you didn’t? 

tonight you were going over to find out and watch a movie with your dad. you walked in to change into sweats and off to your dads. getting to his house you made popcorn  and snacks. as he came home “Sugar pop?” 

“hey Dad.” you walked into the living room as he spoke, “Change of plans i want to get pampered.” Nodding my head as I spoke, ‘Sure?” 

your dad loved getting his nails done. so you and he used to have Medi peddi days growing up. so it wasn’t abnormal. after the nails were done you both got burgers. and went back to his place and watched the movie.  

“Why don’t you like Derek?”

Dad glanced over at you, he sighed heavily, “he’s a troublemaker, I remember him being connected to murder! he was a subject.”

“he was cleared.” you added as he nodded his head, “but he also.. When did you guys get together.” 

“I was almost 21. after I wore him down and convinced him to give me a chance why?” 

your dad rubbed his nose as he spoke, ‘So not when you were a kid?”

shaking your head, you spoke, “No- I mean I had a massive crush on him. but he kept turning me down.” 

“Seriously?” Coach questioned you nodded your head softly, 

“I tired Everything. and I only got worst when he came back- when he finally accepted my date. I was over the moon.” 

“So the whole time you were in school- you weren’t with Derek?”

you bite your bottom lip. as you spoke, ‘when-When Derek kept turning me down. I -I. Greenberg asked me out.” it was your biggest regret and Shame. Dating a Greenberg.. your dad Gagged as he spoke, ‘Oh God! my daughter is tainted you need Holly water did you get holly water to cleanse your body? and Soul? God, please tell me you didn’t sleep with Greenberg.”

“I got a Priest to come and make the Kitty pool in the back full of holly water. and I soaked in it for eight hours. No one is more disgusted than I am.” 

‘”oh God! i thought I raised you better than that! Greenberg! Why not Scott. or biles?”

‘Stiles- and Stiles..- look we aren’t going thru my sex history.. alright I feel gross.. it was Greenberg!” 

“Did he come inside?’ 

shaking his head you spoke-” No.’  he did. but your dad was to freaked out by the idea of you and his Mortal Enemy that he said you had to go home. you said you loved him as he spoke, “GREENBERG SERIOUSLY!” he groaned as he hugged you bye as you went home.

getting home to see the Lights were off. but the solar panel string lights you bought months ago that Derek promised to install up on the porch were up. and lighting, and there were more lights. then Stiles. you smiled as he  was wearing a Suit and holding Daisy. 

“you are brave giving me Flowers.. Derek will hit you.” he chuckled as he spoke, “Don’t worry im not hitting on you. just take the flowers. and go inside.” smiling as you took them and walked inside to open the door to see Peter. again in a suit. and with now lilies. you were lead thru out the house. seeing candles were the main source of light. the entire pack was there as you were giving over five pounds of flowers. you walked outside to see Derek and Eli standing under a Tree. and your dad was there. all three were wearing Suit as Eli, Derek and Dad had your favorite flower. a single one each, the big tree that had a swing was full of lights as you walked over as Eli and Dad gave you their flowers. as Derek smiled brightly at your pure shock impression. 

he stepped over giving you your flower as you spoke, ‘yes!” everyone chuckled as Derek spoke, “Let me ask!” everyone including you chuckled as Derek spoke, ��you remember when we drove past this place during the open house. on our first date?” you nodded your head, ’yea- the tile in the kitchen was neon green.” he grinned at that as he spoke, “we came outside to this large yard and you said this was a home. that the backyard was the best place because you could see A Large family doing get-togethers and you could see a swing on this tree and seeing a little kid playing on it for hours. I decided to buy this house the moment you said it was a home. and I wanted a home for me and Eli.. your dad asked me what was the moment I realized. you were It. you were my Soul. you were over for dinner. Eli was seven. and he cried and you went to check on him. you found Eli wide awake as you grabbed him and showed him paint cards and I walked into you both looking at color. I knew you loved Eli when you fought with me. to paint his room from the yellow it was. you instantly loved Eli with your entire heart. I was afraid to ask you to marry me sooner.  because what we had was Perfection and I didn’t think marriage could change that... then you brought up a baby.. I never been more excited for that chapter of our lives. But i realized i didn’t want to be your baby daddy.. I Didn’t want to be just some Guy. I already knew I would burn the world for you. it took until recently to realize. you would burn the planet down to the ground if something happened to me. or Eli. I  can’t just be your boyfriend anymore.. I want to be your husband. and I want to have a baby with you. and to Fill this yard with family and do family BBQs and to have kids running around. you- Y/N you saved me from the darkness. I can’t bare the days your Sad. and the days you smiling. you melt my heart.. your are Everything I ever wanted and Everything i was terrified of. you can destroy me So easily. and giving someone that much power.. is terrifying.. but you are worst the at heartbreak. make me the happiest man in the world Y/N bug me for the rest of my life.” 

Malia was crying. she was pushing tears away from her face as Stiles hugged Lyida tightly listening into their friend’s proposal. when Coach was crying as he spoke, ‘She accepts.” 

 you all laughed as you said “DAD” Derek looked at you as you were crying as hugged him tightly. crying saying Yes. as you kissed his face and peppered his face with kisses until you found his lips as he squeezed you tightly hugging him tightly. crying also. 

Coach broke the celebration as he spoke, ‘I want three more.” 

“three more proposals?”

“No! Grandbabies Me and Eli discussed it... we want three.” 

Everyone laughed with that as Derek mumbled softly into your ear “I’m good with three more.” you laughed as you said No way to three One baby and that’s it! 

****possible part 3 coming******

[anthraxplus]

forgive me for writing so much about tumblr but i have a lot of thoughts

here's the thing about tumblr. i've found it interesting how we continue to call our profiles our "blogs" even though they function differently to the common idea of a blog (like livejournal). but in a way, calling our profiles our blogs makes sense. they're our place to post things we've made or repost content we like. it's more personal than twitter, which has an "information" or "discourse" lens applied to it. the focus on twitter has increasingly been to encourage sharing of information (i.e news or opinions). tumblr's focus has always (afaict) been to encourage sharing of our creations, kinda lumping blogging in there as "self expression" or something to that effect. technically speaking, artists should be more at home on tumblr than on twitter.

but people using their blog as ONLY a blog (no reblogs, just their thoughts or creations - like a livejournal) are in the minority on this site, right? make no mistake, i follow tons of artists who use their blog in a very focused way, but mostly we're all reblogging other people's posts, putting their art on our blogs and riffing in the tags on people's jokes. it is very much a site of Content, Things To Share. the fact that we can blog on here almost feels oddly secondary. but, ok. tumblr is a site for people to post their creations/content, and said content finds an audience through being discovered or reblogged.

so why is it so damn hard to find anything?

like, ok, obviously we can do that. type words into the search bar and you will definitely find posts. but dont you often wonder why the hell some posts showed up in your search and others didnt?

you're telling me filtering searches by top posts of all time isnt showing me the post that has this exact string of text (+- punctuation), but is showing me posts that... have those words in them, scattered, and sometimes not even that exact word ("piss" vs "pissing")?

what about when you try to search for a word or phrase that you KNOW is on a blog in some post, but searching for it brings up NOTHING? i just had to deal with this when searching someone's blog for a specific post i had just seen on my dash - i can only imagine tumblr told me no such post existed because it wasnt tagged with that word.

and all of this feels so obviously wrong, right? even without tags, we should be able to search for words or phrases in a more reliable way on both the site and our blogs. i dont think im alone in the thought that the search function is almost useless - even if it gives me what im looking for sometimes, it can be a struggle, and mostly it just doesnt feel worth it. this is how we can keep ourselves in insular circles and struggle to break out of them. it is literally easier to do this than it is to find new shit.

so, yknow, staff isnt wrong when they say this:

tumblr does need growth, but not necessarily by attracting new users (though, idk, i wouldn't mind that). tumblr needs internal growth. this site is stuck in the early 2010s in a way that is baffling to me, and it has continuously failed to adapt to its userbase's needs in a way that honestly doesnt make sense, and when they do change something, it just ends up causing more strife between staff and users.

so, for example: tumblr needs money to keep functioning, obviously. the common practice is to have ads on the site. but oops, the ads suck and everyone hates them. ok, allow users the option to pay to get rid of ads. but oops, a lot of people dont want to give money to the site that continuously breaks itself (among many other complaints). ok, meet users in the middle and allow them to pay to advertise their stuff - this should be, like, the perfect mix of everything, right? being able to advertise your content on the content site? but oops, this is only a good option because finding new content is so goddamn hard that random people shoving their posts onto your dash is the only remaining viable option. when you have to rely on pure chance/luck for your posts to even be found, even when you do everything in your power to increase their visibility, you're not gonna want to stay here.

i feel like addressing the search function should be the staff's top priority before they implement anything else. we need to be able to find content on the content site. i think thats pretty obvious. once it works the way it already should have, then they can worry about what comes after. i think people feel this animosity with staff because we're struggling to continue to use this site while they struggle to find ways to get money out of us. i think if people felt they could actually use tumblr in the way it intuitively feels like it should be used, that kind of animosity would be more rare*. but until we get that, any change to the site is going to feel wrong.

fwiw though, i'm glad to see staff say that the site basically doesn't work. like. goddamn. took them long enough. i just hope (probably baselessly) that their acknowledgement of this issue will lead to some fixes that benefit the foundational usage of the site.

*yes, there is animosity towards staff for other reasons - like, yknow, how innocuous selfies of trans women get flagged as "mature" (among other things) - but that's an issue of culture/enforcement and not necessarily the raw function of the site, so i feel like it's best suited for a different post

tl:dr PLEASE FIX THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION, IT NEVER SHOULD'VE BEEN ALLOWED TO BE THIS BAD AND I THINK ITS ISSUES HAVE BEEN A MAJOR REASON FOR TUMBLR'S STEADY DECLINE

[fizzingwizard]

Today on things I IMMEDIATELY turned off, lol...

But first, props to tumblr for at least making sure we all knew about the change, not just silently adding it and making some random tumblr user release a psa. And for making it customizable/easy to disable.

I get how this could be fun. I hate blaze, but if you've got cash to burn and you really think so-and-so's video of a hamster in a party hat is the funniest thing ever, sure, it's your money, waste it how you want. Better to throw some coins to tumblr for hamsters in party hats than treat us to more mainstream ad content.

Of course, out of all the blazed posts that have ended up on my dash, very few have been hamsters-in-party-hats worthy. Most have just been stuff I didn't care about or something mildly insulting. But maybe the hamsters-in-party-hats crowd just don't have money.

Biggest concern is whether you get to consent first to someone else choosing to blaze your post. Tumblr says if someone blazes our post we'll be informed, and have the option to cancel it. It's an opt out instead of opt in. That's what bugs me. I hate opt out. I'd rather that if someone wanted to blaze my post, I had to definitively say "Yes." What if someone blazes my post and I'm in the hospital and don't see it before it's live? You CAN pull it after, which is great, but why not skip that whole song and dance by requiring people to opt in before the post can go live?

Lol. I don't agree. But we'll see.

Also disagree. Blazing is not the same as reblogging. I can't control what other people reblog which ends up on my dash, but I CAN choose who I follow, and if their content becomes something I'm not interested in, I can unfollow them. Only way out of Blaze is to cough up money for ad-free browsing. A while ago I tried blocking blogs that put blazed posts on my dash, but the blazed posts continued to appear. Maybe that has been fixed, I don't know.

The sticking point really is a matter of consent. I've been on tumblr for ten years. I don't freaking remember most of what I posted back then. There's probably something embarrassing someone who really disliked me could dig up if they wanted to. If this option MUST be opt-out, then I wish at least all posts made before the change were opt-in only. If the approval process before someone is allowed to blaze your post is more robust than I anticipate, I won't mind as much though. Basically just let people have the MAIN say in whether or not their post gets blazed, instead of treating the informing of the OP like it's a courtesy.

Tumblr should keep in mind that a lot of original content here is diary-like, personal, meant for a small group of followers who feel comfortable with each other. It's not a site many people use to make their BRAND. That's ALSO one of the good things about tumblr - I don't sit around worrying about how fake everyone is like I do almost anywhere else. That's why I'm not interested in this feature. I can see it being used for good - blazing a gofundme for someone in need, for example - but I just don't want to wade through even more cringe I didn't ask for on my dash. Sigh.

Anyway, hopefully everyone who doesn't want this opts out without a hitch (for side blogs too).

[cardboard-aliens]

The cast swap AU 100% is an excuse for Jack & Tenenbaum content, but the main swaps are:

Jack - Eleanor

Tenenbaum - Delta

Atlas - Sinclair

Ryan - Lamb

The basic canon divergent background information leading up to 1960 got long so imma put it under a cut.

Big Mommas and Little Brothers are the protector gatherer duo of this AU. There are no Dads and sisters.

Lamb gathers enough followers and momentum to usurp control of Rapture from Ryan.

Ryan gets promptly thrown INTO jail with his most loyal supports.

The most important detail about Ryan going to jail is that he will not be able to kill Jasmine 😌💖

Lamb now has control of the whole city to devote into her Utopian research.

Various people take issue as the notion of everyone being reborn into one collective mind comes forth. Mostly Sinclair, who can't make money as a pile of ADAM goop, so he uses his resources to arm citizens. Wanting to take advantage of the split in the city for his own plays for control.

Fontaine is pissed he didn't take over the city from Ryan, and has to reconsider all his plans, since they were built around Ryan. Ultimately abandoning his contingency plan to fake his death earlier.

Lamb takes over Fontaine's assets once he's gone for ADAM research, and starts funneling out any problematic staff to be turned into ADAM goop so they can be part of the collective.

Tenenbaum has been unimpressed with Fontaine, Ryan and now Lamb , and was preparing the gatherer cure to try and do some damage to the program. But then Ryan goes to jail, and Tenenbaum knows Fontaine's weapon only served a purpose with Ryan in the picture. And then Fontaine 'dies', and Lamb seizes the company and Tenenbaum doesn't trust her to be any more humane to the children. So she tries for a mad dash to disappear with Jack before Lamb discovers Project WYK.

This escape attempt goes poorly, and they get caught. Lamb assumes Jack is just your average gatherer that Tenenbaum was defecting with, and since Tenenbaum is CLEARLY going to be a problem Lamb is like "You wanna hang out with a brother so much I can arrange that" and ships them off tho the protector and gatherer programs to be bonded. (very much like mark and cindy)

There is now an opening for a lead scientist at Fontaine Futuristics that needs filling. No one is qualified for the job, and Lamb takes someone Ryan had a target on: so say hello to Dr. Johnny Topside. Who knows some marine biology which was good ENOUGH for this understaffed department.

Suchong hates working with Topside, and complains about how under qualified he is constantly. And he complains about Lamb's research goals, and how she cancelled his previous projects to focus on ADAM's memory properties.

Suchong's work load gets smaller as more of his projects get handed off to Topside, which makes him even more irritable. And then he starts to suspect Lamb is phasing him out to turn his egotistical behind into a pile of ADAM.

So Suchong disappears, trying to find refuge in Persephone with Ryan (b/c Ryan IS charismatic, and is doing well enough for himself in prison) trying to barter for his own safety by telling Ryan about Fontaine Company secrets, mainly about Project WYK and how Ryan's flesh and blood was put into the Gatherer Program.

Johnny Topside can't keep track of what's going on, because one minute he mapping the ocean floor, the next he found atlantis, then he's been branded a spy, next he's the lead scientist in a department he doesn't understand, and now his life is being threatened if he doesn't experiment on children. He just wanted to collect rocks samples.

The little brothers are baby and he is NOT on board with their treatment, and starts digging into what research was left behind by the woman who had this job before him--and he finds Tenenbaum's research on the Little Brother cure. Which he then picks back up to finish development, and then prepares to go on the run to save as many brothers as he can.

Sinclair and Lamb have been raising their own tensions across the city, proving they're just the same as Fontaine and Ryan as fights break out. Which ultimately escalate back up to riots breaking out against Lamb's rule, headed by Sinclair this time around.

The chaos causes a lot of canon typical events to happen, Rapture is in decline, Ryan can leave prison to kill a big momma and drag his gatherer son to prison to ride out the war, and Johnny takes a run for it to get away from Lamb with a handful of children.

(For convenience sake Eleanor is her BS2 age in 1960, otherwise she'll be like. 9 or 10. and not able to actually fight. and I want her to do COOL BATTLE STUNTS) Eleanor has been paying CLOSE attention to her mom this whole time, and watching her boil people down into ADAM, experiment on children, and manipulate the people to throw their lives away fighting for her has done a lot to disillusion her from Lamb's way. Some come 1960, she's got a gun, a dream to see the sun, and figured the best way to beat her mother is with the enemy of her enemy: Sinclair.

[wornoutmouse]

Fun fact: the type of snake determines how much it will cost to catch it. 500 if venomous, 150 if it's not. Prices may vary of course.

Inumaki will talk often in this cause I'll be damned if I gotta make this story dependent on narration. Also its outside of the jjk world so he can talk

……...2 dicks

Everyone knew not to travel alone in the woods. There always had to be 2 people together. One to stay on the correct trail and the other to keep a lookout. "Why?" Monsters of course.

As a child, you remembered hearing all the stories surrounding the dark forest your small town lived next to. After a certain age of course you stopped believing in the legends but that didn't mean you purposely went into the forest. Even without the demons and jin, there were other things to worry about like poisonous plants and snakes. You hated snakes.

Even so, this situation you put yourself in was partially your fault. The whole week you'd been rushing to and from work, parties, and late night ice cream runs. In the blur of mind maddening chaos, there was a day you forgot to close and lock your back porch.

 Just one day was all it took for something to slip inside, and naively you thought nothing of it when your back porch door was open. Your home was your parents childhood home so your backyard was the woods. You didn't expect anything like an axe murderer to slip in, maybe small bugs and the occasional deer. But then the hissing began to start.

All throughout your house you could hear the telltale sound of a snake hissing. At first you thought you were tripping whenever it stopped. You checked the faucets for dripping, the yard for cicadas, and even made sure none of your appliances weren't about to burst into flames. You didn't figure out what it was until you decided to directly follow the sound one day coming along a lower cabinet. You peek through the crack and are introduced to a white scaled face.

You screamed falling back as it slithered out the cabinet. Your heart bounded as more and more of its body pooled out of your cabinet taking up most of the bathroom floor when it finally evacuated. Your grandfather would ridicule you for this claim but you swore up and down it stopped to look at you like it was annoyed before slithering away. 

Nowadays the sounds mainly echo from  the kitchen so you've been having take out a lot more often having to dash to deliver the leftovers to your refrigerator. 

Time and time again you tried calling a snake tamer to lure and capture the creature out but each time, they had come up empty-handed letting 500 dollars go down the drain. When you told your grandfather about it he was of course unhelpful, ranting on how you'd forgotten all your mother and grandmother's old wives’ tales about Nagas and Yokai. 

Sitting in your living room eating cheese puffs and painting your nails white, you spoke to him over the phone. The rattling today had been louder and more incessant than usual. "I can't even sleep, it usually would have stopped by now but it's been going on all day. It's like it's trying to kick me out of my own house!" The bell-like voice of your grandfather seeps through the phone, "Maybe it is, or maybe it's trying to lure you into its den!" 

You snort, "Well if it is it's doing a shit job cause I was already in here." As if hearing your words the hissing stops. "Thank god! I'm going to go get some sleep before it starts again." Your grandfather stutters out faint words about names and cheesecake. Useless information that meant nothing for you as you took a dash to your bedroom, cutting off all the lights. 

You sighed diving atop the comforting softness of your silk sheets. You wait a few minutes to see if the rattling will start again. When it doesn't you smile and allow yourself to get drowsy. When you finally come knocking on the Sandman's door,  a soft hiss catches your lagged ears and something pale glints in the sun lit hallway. It wasn't until later you remembered how high on the ceiling the eyes  were.

You don't know for how long you sleep, you don't even know if it was the same day. But how agonizing cries and bones snapping sound was not something you wanted to know. You rip your covers off your body and tiptoe towards your bedroom door that was somehow closed. Cracking the door, you see familiar pearl white scales. Unknowingly long, thick, white, and blocking the door from opening farther than a smidgen.

The limb would tremble every now and again before swirling into a different position or rising into the air all together. The next thing you see is red. Splotches and speckles decorating the white canvas the more your eyes traveled until finally, your eyes met flesh, real human flesh. The base of this snake-like tail connected to a man equally as pale if not paler than the pure white appendage. 

The man raised his arm and in his clawed hand was the head of a man begging for his life. "Please, let me go. I didn't mean to, I didn't know anyone was here!!" 

The snake man said nothing, you still couldn't see his face and was honestly glad you couldn't as the fearful man became pale in the face.  "Oh God, what are you!?" Before you could see more you close the door breathing raggedy. You can hear a bone-chilling crunch of bones through the solid wood and the gurgle of the man as he is devoured. Silence ensues before the rattling begins.

 Having nowhere else to go you hop into your bed covering yourself with your blankets in hopes that if you go back to sleep it will all be over. You see light creep onto your sheets and hear your carpeted floor rustling as something heavy drags across it. The hissing amplifies as the tail presumably enters your room. 

The door shuts and you are shrouded in darkness once again. You shake as your bed dips and your sheet is dragged slowly off your body. You clench your eyes shut feigning sleep. I should have listened now I'm going to die!

Something cool touches your foot and travels up.  As it creeps more and more of your body is enveloped in a cool surrounding.  You are raised above your bed before settling into a circular area. "Open your eyes." Is almost too easy how you follow the command and stare up at the being you had been terrorizing you for 6 months. 

To your surprise his face was normal save for two blue lines protruding from each corner of his mouth before ending in round circles with a dot in the middle.  "W-What are you?" The man stares down at you tilting his head but says nothing. You sit up straighter in the cold of his tail.  "I asked you what you are and what are you doing in my house?!" This time a coy smile forms on his face. "Not your house, my den, remember?" A distant memory of your conversation earlier crosses your mind.  

The man leans towards you with interest in his eyes. He seemed to wonder what you'd do next. "Well, what do you want with me?" He shrugged, still staring incessantly. You were starting to feel uncomfortable so just asked the question resting on your mind.  "Are you going to eat me?" To your horror, he shrugged again. "Well can you please get out of my house?" The man straightens in posture yet brings your body up with him. "You are in my den."

You look away, unable to maintain constant eye contact. Something wet and fluttering touches your skin making you jump. As unexpectedly expected, the man had a forked tongue. Based on your knowledge as well this meant he was smelling you. "Can I at least have your name?! The man's eyes widened in surprise as if he'd never been asked his name before. He goes back to nuzzling your neck, tongue flickering periodically. "Inumaki." You snort, "Inumaki, that's a weird name." Inumaki stops his nuzzling to stare at you 

"What is your name?" The animosity behind the words sent a chill down your skin.  His tail coils tightly as he looks down at you.  Hands that hadn't moved before come up to feel underneath your ribs. "Y/n… my name is Y/n." The rattle begins again and the coil unravels. Inumaki's docile demeanor completely shifts to a knowing one.  One that made you feel trapped and controlled as his eyes adopted a blue sheen to them "Y/n!" Inumaki exclaims your name as if it was a celebration. He raises your high in the air with his hands as he uncoils his tail.  

You were oblivious to what was going on until a small slit that was invisible to the naked eye, opened up where Inumaki was connected to his snake half.  Your mouth goes dry when two nubs begin to protrude from the area until 'nub' is no longer the appropriate word for the two white appendages hanging from his presumed crotch area. They were the same phallic shape as a human but became more narrow towards the end. In all honestly they looked like tails as well

Inumaki cups your pussy through your pajama bottoms making you snap back into reality. "H-Hey wait a minute what's this?! What's going on here!"  Inumaki used a clawed thumb to press into your crotch, fitting his finger between your pussy lips through the fabric. "Names mean more than gold to me, little Y/n." 

You close your legs trapping Inumaki's arm in-between. He chuckles as he has no problem adding more pressure to your clit. The end of his tail rattles at the same rhythm of his finger in an almost hypnotic way. You have nowhere to go as you are suspended high in the air, your arms propping themselves against the ceiling just as your wetness soaks through your underwear and dampens the crotch of your pajama bottoms. 

You release a whiny moan when Inumaki moves his fingers counter clockwise. "Don't run from it." Your pussy clenches around nothing and the sight of Inumaki's cocks became more and more appealing. Inumaki's forked tongue flickered past his lips as he watched you. Previously circular pupils became slits the more he studied you.  The way your eyelashes fanned your high cheekbones. How your bottom lip was shiny and wet from your tongue swiping across it nervously. 

You were perfect to carry his eggs so damn perfect,  but not yet.  Inumaki's tail closes the door behind him,  the last words leaving your lips,  "Fuck."

Bruh I lost inspiration but I refuse to let 1,855 words go to waste

[rose2jam]

Why It Was Practically Inevitable That Severus Snape Would Join A Cult, an essay by Rose Jam

So, let’s talk about Cults. Disclaimer: This is just information I’ve gathered over the years from my personal fascination with religious cults.  I’m in no way an expert or a psychologist or whatever.  This is just my personal understanding from the research I’ve done.

A cult is started when a wildly charismatic Leader feels like they have a purpose, a higher calling, or a mission to be fulfilled (or they could also just be an egomaniac). Maybe they really do feel like what makes them special comes directly from a higher power, be that God, or the Heir of Slytherin, but either way, this person has a pathological need to be worshiped, and they need followers in order to do that.  

So, how does one obtain Followers easily? By finding the misunderstood misfits of society, and promising them something.  The people who feel like no one else understands them, or their ideologies.  But this Leader?  This Leader GETS IT, MAN! The Leader understands them perfectly, vindicates them, and makes them promises along the way.  Like, if they stick with the Leader, then not only will they finally be understood, but they themselves will also be revered.  That they will rise above all of the others who have put them down for so long, and will come out on top as a superior being.  

Any of this sounding familiar?

Charles Manson preyed on young people in the middle of the hippie movement, mostly women, who were feeling lost, lonely, and in need of guidance, or in terms of the men he recruited, seeking power over others.  Not all of these people were poor or helpless; some of them came from middle class, or even rich homes and families.  Yes, some of them came from broken homes, but all of them felt “broken” themselves, in some way. So Manson used their desires to have a family to draw them in.  He then used LSD and other drugs to keep them under his control, and he created a manipulative environment where the members of his “family” felt they could never leave him, and if they didn’t follow his commands, something horrible would happen to them.  I’m not going to go into full detail on the Manson Family Murders, but if you’re personally interested, check out the Podcast “Cults” on Spotify.

So back to basics, this Leader draws in Followers with flowery promises of community, power, family, or whatever.  But once the Leader has that following, the terror will begin.  Cult Leaders are usually master manipulators, and have completely brainwashed their followers into believing the “us vs them” mentality, that the outside world is evil, that the outside world will only harm them, that the outside world would never understand what they’re doing on the inside.  And that the Leader is the only one who knows the truth, so they better stick with him.  Or maybe the Leader has gaslit his followers so completely, that they become dependent on him for everything, to the point where they don’t know how they would possibly function without the Leader.  Or, the Leader has created an environment that’s so hostile, that Followers are too afraid of what might happen to them if they tried to leave, or didn’t do what the Leader commanded.  Typically, it’s a combination of all of the above.  Destructive cults will either hurt others outside of their circle (The Manson Family, Sect of Nacozari), harm themselves (Heaven’s Gate, The Ant Hill Kids), or both (The People’s Temple, Aum Sinrikyo).  

Now that I’ve laid this foundation, I’m going to tell you why it was practically inevitable that Severus Snape would join a cult.

Snape’s childhood ultimately laid the foundation for the mental state he would be in when he decided to join the Death Eaters.  He grew up in an abusive household, where his father, the muggle, had his magical wife so thoroughly whipped, that she couldn’t (or chose not to) use magic to defend herself, or her son (1).  Eileen had obviously told Severus about magic, about Hogwarts, about what a wonderful place it was, and what a wonderful gift magic could be.  Severus also watched as Tobias beat the magic out of her.  (I know it’s debated whether Tobias actually physically abused his family, but he certainly verbally/mentally/emotionally abused them, so the term “beat” could be used figuratively as well).  I don’t think it’s unreasonable to believe that Severus developed an extreme hatred of muggles with “burn the witch” mentalities from a very young age because of this.

Enter Lily, perhaps the only other magical person in his life besides his mother up to this point. He sees her using magic out in the open, perhaps recklessly, for fun, and he sees an opportunity to make a friend (and, admittedly, to be smarter than someone about something for a while). He was so eager to tell her all about magic, because getting to learn magic, and go to Hogwarts, has possibly been the only thing keeping him going in his young life.  And now he’s made a friend, a real friend who doesn’t think he’s weird because he’s magical.  Unlike Petunia, yet another muggle who makes fun of him for being weird (2). And Lily actually seems to like him back.  For a kid who probably hasn’t received a lot of affection in his life, this is monumental.  This friendship is everything.  Why wouldn’t he love her?

So the time finally comes to go to Hogwarts.  Severus gets to escape his abusive household, and finally has an opportunity to embrace magic for the first time in his life.  But almost immediately, he’s met with a hic-up.  Specifically, James Potter and Sirius Black.  So Severus is no longer facing abuse exclusively from muggles who think he’s weird, but now he’s also getting it from other magical people who think he’s weird (3).  And this started on the fucking TRAIN before he even GOT to Hogwarts. You can’t tell me that wouldn’t sour a kids dream right off the fucking bat.  And then, when he finally gets there, he’s separated from his only friend, by being sorted into different houses (4).  What a way for a life-long dream to be thoroughly dashed in less than 24 hours.

Let’s look at Snape’s Hogwarts experience.  He’s a good student, and he pours himself into learning as much magic as possible, and at being the best he can possibly be, probably motivated by a desire to be better than what his Father thinks possible.  During this time, he is regularly bullied and abused by the Marauders. Sometime before his 5th year, the Incident at the Shrieking Shack took place.  It definitely sucks to have been so thoroughly fucking duped, and put into a life-threatening situation involving a goddamn werewolf (5).  But perhaps even worse than that, the salt in the wound, was that no one fucking did anything about it (6).  He saw Sirius and James and Remus get out of that situation without facing any sort of proper punishment (as in, they all still stayed at the school as opposed to being expelled like they DEFINITELY SHOULD HAVE BEEN (At least Sirius should have been)). Dumbledore was looking out for the Marauders, but no one was looking out for Severus.  On top of that, Severus isn’t allowed to TELL anyone about it, not even Lily.  So, he goes through what was possibly one of the most traumatic experiences of his life, and he can’t even tell anyone that it happened.

So, what sort of support system does Severus have during all this?  He has Lily, sure (who literally told him he should be GRATEFUL to James, one of his abusers).  But, what he really has, is Slytherin House (7). I’ll say it plainly: Severus was sorted into a house that was already full of existing cult members.  McGonagall says in Sorcerer’s Stone that “Your house will be like your family” (she at least says it in the movies, I’m too lazy to get up and reference my books rn lol).  So, Severus’ family, his support system, for 10 months out of every year, is a house that is already full to the brim with pureblood elitists with prejudiced ideals, who would absolutely vindicate Severus in his dislike for muggles.  As a kid first getting sorted into the house, it’s obviously not unreasonable to become friends with the people you’re literally living with.  His dorm mates became his family.  So, when his dorm mates started to become Death Eaters… This is headcanon, I fully admit, but like, fuck, Severus didn’t have a lot of friends, and was probably already drifting apart from Lily.  Do you really think he was going to tell the people he had to live with every single day, not to mention the only people that had been supporting him for years, to go fuck themselves for using Dark Magic?  Especially when he was probably feeling like he was on the verge of thinking that their rhetoric made some sense?

On to Snape’s Worst Memory (8).  At this point, he’s spent 5 years in Slytherin House, with fellow students who casually throw around the M word.  He gets attacked by James and Sirius, he’s practically defenseless, and then the girl who he’d considered his closest friend for so long… has to force herself not to smile when he’s thrown upside down and exposed to everyone on the grounds.  Sure, she was trying to defend him at first, but she also fucking nearly smiled at his humiliation, his pain, his abuse.  So he hurls the one word that he knows is going to cut the deepest, that will hopefully hurt her as badly as she has hurt him. And it works.

Severus had been beaten down his entire life.  By Muggles and Magic Folk alike.  And finally, he’s betrayed by Lily, his last lifeline to the light.  He betrayed her as well, of course.  But he did try to show remorse.  And she doesn’t forgive him (9), which was her prerogative, of course.  

So.  Who does he have left?

I’ve placed little (numbers) throughout my writing here.  Each of those numbers denote the specific events that led Severus to becoming an angry young man, who hates muggles, hates (some) magic folk, and resulted in him feeling weak, helpless, and desperate.  For what?  For power, for a family, for a community.  For a world where he is no longer the weird one.  For a world where he’s respected, strong.  For the world he thought he was going to be a part of, when he arrived at Hogwarts in his first year.

And it just so happens that this is the exact world that Voldemort is (allegedly) trying to create.

Severus Snape was angry, and vulnerable, and as such, he was practically the poster child for the type of person who would be susceptible to falling for a cult.  Maybe he was recruited by his friends in Slytherin House.  Maybe he was recruited directly.  Either way, charismatic Tom Riddle came along, understood how he felt, where he was coming from, told him he deserved better, and offered him all of the things he never had in his life.  And being at rock bottom, being the lowest of the low, to Severus it must have seemed like a miracle of an opportunity, or perhaps, like the only chance he had left.

Now, let me be extremely clear; everything I’ve written is not trying to EXCUSE Severus Snape for his actions.  There is always a point where personal responsibility must come into play.  Except for children born into cults or victims of kidnapping, nearly every person who has ever joined a cult has made the personal decision to join it. I’m just trying to express how unbelievably easy it is, for a Cult Leader to find people with damaged lives and low self-worth, to suck them in with promises of a fulfilling life and grandeur, and for those people to be easily swept up and brainwashed into believing that what they are doing is right.  (Or that what they are doing is required, because the alternative is more horrifying.)  

The type of people who joined the Death Eaters are the same type of people who joined Heaven’s Gate, or The People’s Temple, or yes, The Manson Family.  Now, I’m just going to say, from my own personal point of view, I do not vilify anyone who’s ever joined a destructive cult.  On the contrary, I feel sorry for them.  Because most people who join a cult, don’t necessarily do it signing up for the… end result of what happened to them.  Some of them totally do, like Heaven’s Gate. Most of them knew that the end result was going to be the “evacuation of their earthly vessel”.  But the people who joined the Manson Family, for instance, did not initially join it KNOWING how it was going to end.  They were part of the family long before Manson even came up with Helter Skelter, and by the time the Tate-LaBianca Murders took place, they were already too far gone to go against it.

I highly recommend anyone who’s interested in a humanizing view of former cult members, to read the essay “Leslie Van Houten: A Friendship” by John Waters. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/leslie-van-houten-a-frien_b_246953

Or, at the very least, listen to this 7 minute NPR interview with John Waters about the essay https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=111585116

It’s the story of how notorious film maker John Waters, became friends with former Manson Girl, Leslie Van Houten, and about how she broke away from the cult after her conviction, how she’s spent the last 51 years of her life recovering from the psychotic influence of a maniac who’d promised her the world, and how even though she was convicted to life WITH a possibility of parole, it’s never been granted to her, despite the fact that she has done literally everything possible to try and atone for her crimes.

Maybe I’m just a bleeding heart.  I’m pretty much the only person I know who feels sorry for Leslie Van Houten and other cult members who were brainwashed, abused, and manipulated into doing a lot of the horrible things they’ve done.  But there are people in the world, who have committed FAR more heinous crimes than the Manson Family murders, and who are far less repentant than Leslie, but because those crimes weren’t as notorious, they get to walk free.

Addendum: When I first posted this, I had a few people point out to me that they had always associated Voldemort and the Death Eaters with Hitler and Nazi Germany.  This is a perfectly fair point, but one that I personally don’t jive with, and the reason is simply the numbers.   There were literally millions of people in the Nazi party during WW2.   Death Eaters don’t even reach triple digits, as far as I’m aware.  As I hinted at in this essay, I consider Voldemort and the Death Eaters to be MUCH closer to Charles Manson and the Manson Family.  The Manson Family 100% had Nazi ideology, of course. "Helter Skelter” was Charles Manson’s prediction that there was going to be a massive race war; one that the Whites were going to lose, and that he and his Pure White family would emerge from it in order to rule over the remaining Blacks.  Kinda... sounds like a Death Eater thing, huh?

Sorry.  Back to Snape.  There is a lot we don’t know about Severus’ actual time as a Death Eater. I think it can be reasonably assumed he’s never actually killed anyone before Dumbledore (In Prince’s Tale, Severus questions if his soul would be safe from killing Dumbledore, and Dumbledore implies that his soul would not be damaged by helping an old man avoid pain and humiliation.  This leads me to believe that Severus never committed any soul-damaging murders before this).  Beyond being a sneaky spy and delivering the prophecy to Voldemort, his time as a Death Eater is all up for conjecture.  

Severus does make one important deviation from the typical cult member mold, however.  In the end, he manages to break away from the cult.  The scales fall from his eyes.  In a figurative sense, the LSD has worn off.  What made him sober up, was the threat to his last lifeline to the light. The one good fucking thing he’d ever had in his miserable life.  He was brought back by genuine love.  Ya know, the ENTIRE MESSAGE OF THE HP SERIES. And not only did he leave the cult, but he then spent the rest of his life actively attempting to destroy it, and atone for the mistakes he’s made, in an effort to bring back the world he’d been excited for, as an 11-year-old kid, so full of hope.

[naruto-scenarios-plus-akatsuki]

Are you going to make a part 3 for the Neji one where he has a crush on the branch member and ten ten and Lee find out. You don’t have to but I really enjoy it!😁

Well it took me a lot longer than expected but I say that about all my work now, lol. Sorry everyone I’m a slow writer. But I hope you all enjoy the final piece to this fic. 

Part I  Part II

Welp! The secret is out, Neji: Part III

The look in Neji’s eyes of pure unfiltered irritation was a look that Tenten would never forget. The minute that you stepped out of the room, Neji had quickly fixed his glare on the two of them. His voice left a chill in the air as he told them to get out with the most even tone. Lee began to apologize, fumbling over his words in his stark surprise.

Tenten’s eyes had snapped way from the cup of tea Neji knocked over in Lee’s hands purposely while your back was turned. She couldn’t believe her eyes and her head was still trying to wrap around the events that transpired. She had to grab Lee to leave when she saw Neji’s fists tighten while he closed his eyes. She knew in that moment that Neji did not want any apologies. He was holding back his anger, so she made a quick getaway towing Lee with her, even while he was still apologizing.

Tenten could only hope that Neji would find it in his heart to forgive Lee for spilling the beans. She knew how private of an individual Neji was; especially, when it came to expressing feelings. She was afraid that this might be the last time he would trust them with his secrets. She sighed, knowing this was a delicate situation.

Lee was currently wailing about his woes while they waited in the training fields for Neji and their sensei.

“I can’t believe I spoke so carelessly.”

“It’s alright Lee,” Tenten tried to console, half-heartedly. “I’m sure Y/N didn’t catch on” at least Tenten hoped and she hoped Neji wouldn’t hold a grudge for too long about the incident either.

“How will Neji ever forgive me?” Lee continued to whine, but then jumped up at an idea. “I know! I’ll offer to do his laundry, or I could buy him some tea.”

“I don’t think Neji’s going to let you touch his laundry.” Tenten shot down, knowing Neji probably had a precise way of doing it and who’s to say if he would really let his whites be washed by Lee. “And… I don’t think tea would be a good gift after what just happened,” she mentioned thoughtfully.

Lee slapped his forehead and exclaimed, “Of course! Not tea! That would definitely remind him of my transgressions. But what can I give then? What can I do?”

“Well…” Tenten started but she was a little lost too.

Neji wasn’t much into sweets, nor was he really into gifts of any kind. Tenten had placed her hands on her hips and was continuing to think of what could appease Neji when he appeared on the training field. Both team members were surprised.

“Neji!” they both exclaimed but Tenten was the first to stutter out a response.

“You’re back so soon.” That had her worried. They barely rushed out thirty minutes ago.

“Yes.” Neji’s tone was flat.

“Is everything okay?” Lee asked, concerned.

“Perfectly,” He spoke shortly. His eyes sharp, but his expression was blank. “Lee shall we get started?”

Neji spoke so coolly that Tenten felt a chill run up the back of her neck. Lee easily agreed to start sparring with Neji; wanting to do anything to please him at that moment. However, Tenten could easily see that Neji was not at all at peace. His strikes were fierce against Lee. It was obvious that Neji wanted to pacify his anger and direct it at Lee. Training was the perfect guise for that.

Lee took everything that Neji had. He would block hits and strike with his own but there was a lack of effort on Lee’s part. He fell to the ground many times but kept getting back up to take what Neji had in store for him.

During their skirmish, Gai arrived and stood beside Tenten. He spectated his pupils with interest and noticed right away something was off.

“My intuition is telling me something is off between the two of them.”

“Your intuition is not wrong,” Tenten replied. Her brows were furrowed down in concentration. Her teammates were typically rough with each other, which is why she had little concern, but she was worried about Neji holding a grudge over them for a long time.

“Say you wouldn’t happen to know what this is about, do ya?” Gai questioned. “Neji’s attacks seems to be very targeted at Lee with blunt force and normally, Lee holds a better stance than that and seems to be putting in less effort as if he’s conflicted.” He reasoned, his voice calm.

Tenten sighed. “You’re not off point. Lee accidently confessed to Neji’s crush that he liked them. I don’t think Neji was ready to tell them yet.”

“Ah, yes. A young man’s love can often stir up the fire in his being,” Gai nodded to himself for a moment, stroking his chin. Then once he came to a decision, he patted Tenten on the shoulder and gave her a thumbs up. “I got this.”

She sweat dropped, not sure if her sensei would make things worse, but before she could say anything Gai was already breaking up Neji and Lee’s sparring session.

“Alright that’s enough. Lee why don’t you continue training with Tenten. Neji, come and walk with me,” Gai directed. He put a hand on Neji’s shoulder briefly to signal for him to follow, leaving Lee and Tenten to their own devices.

Neji followed out of respect. He was still feeling grim and annoyed on the inside. When the two of them were far enough away from his teammates, that’s when Gai addressed the issue.

“So, I hear Lee had spilled the beans to the one who has your affections”

“I think Tenten should not be repeating Lee’s mistake and learn to keep her mouth shut.” Neji’s eyes narrowed and his voice was cold once more. He knew exactly who had informed Gai about the situation and it annoyed him further.

“Tell me about the one that ignites the fire inside your being,” Gai prompted, not at all bother by Neji’s display.

“I rather much not talk about it. Especially after today's events,” Neji mumbled, his cheeks tinting slightly red. This was something he did not want to talk about with his sensei of all people.

Gai nodded, understanding Neji’s hesitancy and ignoring it. He understood how Neji operated after three years of training him and he doubt his other students meant to cause such trouble for him. Their intentions probably meant well but a small slip of the tongue probably left Neji in a very unwanted situation. Gai knew that the Hyuga clan which Neji belonged to highly respected privacy and lacked open affection.

His face was serious and did not scold or reprimand him in tone when he continued.

“When I was a young man, I found one such as you did that ignited the fire within my loins. They were beautiful and caught my eye. Not only was my eye caught, but others as well stared at their beauty. I wanted so badly to catch their attention like they caught mine, but alias, my rival had won them over before I could. Yet! I knew to not give up the chase and at least make my affections known.”

“And?” Neji asked simply, not sure where his sensei was going with this. “Did they return your affections?”

“No,” Gai answered and Neji deadpanned.

“Then what is the point of your story?” Neji asked a bit impatient due to feeling uncomfortable.

“That you never know how someone feels unless you try. The one who caught my affections never carried the same affection for me, but their affections were also not returned by Kakashi either. My courage in telling them (despite how they had felt about me) gave them courage to make known their own affections. One just has to come forward in order for any two to be together. You see what I mean Neji?”

“Yes…” He admitted.

“If you like this person, there will never be nothing more if you never tell them how you feel. You’re young and with the life we live, you never know when your last day is coming. It’s better to say all that is on your heart now, than to have it on your mind during your last breath,” Gai mentioned somber.

He stepped forward towards Neji and patted him on the shoulder, giving him an encouraging smile.

“Now why don’t you skedaddle and take a moment to reflect. Come back when you have settled what is in your heart. And try to forgive Lee and Tenten.”

With that Gai took his leave and vanished into the trees.

Neji took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He was still slightly annoyed but not so much anymore. He knew Lee didn’t mean to say what he had on purpose and he knew Tenten only wanted to help and make peace of the situation. His teammates were cavalier at times, but they were good and honest friends of his. What had really annoyed him was himself for not telling Y/N how he felt sooner and not knowing if you even felt the same.

He hated to admit it but Gai was right. He had no way of knowing how you felt unless he were to confess his own feelings first. He wouldn’t have been so bothered if he didn’t let the fear of the unknown keep him from revealing himself. He could never be with you, if he kept his feelings locked inside unless he had the courage, or you did.  

With that, Neji took a slow walk back to the Hyuga compound. He was stalling as he was mauling over what to say to you. He wanted to make things right for earlier as well. He had upped and dashed. He caused a spill you had to clean up. He felt guilty and rude for doing so.

He passed by some wildflowers on his way and picked a few white and yellow daises. He twirled them in his hand, wondering if that was sufficient as his mind ran. When he got to the Hyuga compound, he headed towards his personal corridors and went to his kitchen, looking for something meaningful. He grabbed a tray and started preparing an array of snacks on said tray. He then took an extra step to start squeezing some lemons to make lemonade for you since he knew you did not care for tea. Lemonade was your favorite drink. He grabbed two cups to place on the tray next to the pitcher and the flowers he picked for you neatly placed along the snacks.

When he was ready, he took the tray and headed to your quarters. He knew exactly where you resided. He braced himself as he stood in front of your door. He knocked, trying to steel himself.

When you opened the door, you took his breath away. You weren’t dressed up, but your natural beauty and lovely lavender eyes made him lose himself slightly. You had appeared in your normal attire that you were wearing before he left, your curse seal left uncovered. Your hair was down and cascaded round you.

“Neji?” You questioned, surprised to see him at your door holding a tray out to you. “What is this?”

“An apology for earlier.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to.”

“I do, because I had created the mess earlier when my teammates were here,”

Your eyes grew wide and your mouth formed an o-shape.

“But that’s not all,” Neji continued. “I wanted to do this for you because I like you.”

“I…” You were stunned and felt your heart flutter at the confession. “I like you too, Neji.”

“Would you like to have refreshments with me?” Neji asked more confidently, but there were still butterflies flying around in his stomach.

You smiled in awe at his gesture and were overwhelmed with joy. “Yes.”

With that you followed Neji out into the courtyard, where you two sat and got to know one another better and enjoyed the fresh lemonade he made especially for you. You were finally happy to have gotten answers, that the one you always admired had you written in his heart. Both you and Neji being grateful to his teammates for letting the secret out.

[dreadwulf]

1. It Was There That I Saw You

He hears it over the radio that first time. 

“The Blue Angel is down.”

One of those crummy broadcasting setups that still run out of universities sometimes. Ancient amateur stations he picks up on the road while trying to plot out a route to the family compound around the Others. They announce sightings sometimes, rather like weather reports, or traffic updates. Undead on Highway 11, detour recommended.

The roads are clear that evening, and the drive is as quiet and peaceful as a biodiesel vehicle can manage, except for the news on the radio.

"The Blue Angel is down, and our world grows a little bit colder and darker," the radio man says.

Jaime switches off the receiver. He shakes his head slightly as he drives the ungainly armored car along the winding road, peering into the dusk without headlights. The radio man doesn’t know the Blue Angel. He’s some punk kid, was probably at uni when the Others first attacked and hasn’t ventured outside since. That’s who still broadcasts these days, old student outfits barricaded inside their campuses. This kid doesn’t know the Blue Angel’s name, probably doesn’t even know she's a woman. He will pay him no mind.

But he leaves the radio off for the rest of the journey.

At the Rock he pulls the car into the oversized garage and erects the usual gates and barriers behind him to keep the Others out. These precautions he can do in his sleep now, and he hardly has to think on them. He is more fortunate than most, now - living in a walled compound in a walled city offers a stability most people no longer have, one that would have been unheard of not very long ago. It gives him a more uneventful life, even some creature comforts. It's also, in his opinion, dreadfully boring. Which is why he never stays for long.

His thoughts pivot around the voice on the radio. The Blue Angel. He gave her that name, years ago, before anyone knew her at all. When it was just the two of them on the Kingsroad, and she was hardly more than a kid herself. Does the kid on the radio know that? No, he assuredly does not. The kid on the radio doesn’t know anything. 

His brother Tyrion will have heard the news elsewhere. He doesn’t listen to radio, wouldn’t have any reason to since he never leaves the compound. But he has his own sources.

His brother is the second person to tell him, when Jaime walks into the front office loosening his tie. As expected, Tyrion’s still working - it would be either that or reading, even when the house goes dark. Their generator only runs a few hours a day, and his brother keeps right on working by lamplight when the time’s up. 

Tyrion has taken over the family business, as well as the mansion and all its high walls. That happened after the rest of the family had been wiped out, while Jaime had been away. Ironic that he had survived them all, considering he had been essentially left to die when the Others came. Like many of the sick and disabled, there had not been much provision for his physical difficulties as a little person and he had been left to fend for himself. Anyone who couldn’t defend themselves was SOL in that first year. How he had even gotten himself home from uni is a bit of a mystery to Jaime. By the time Jaime managed to get himself there, his brother was already gone, and it had taken them a very long time to find one another again. 

It had been his brother’s cleverness helped him survive, not his big brother, to both of their disappointment. Said cleverness certainly keeps them in business now.

Tyrion probably hasn’t looked up from his ledgers in hours, but he looks up when Jaime comes in, and keeps looking.

“Blue Angel’s down,” Tyrion mentions casually, but he is watching him closely.

“So they say.” Jaime whirls off his long coat and throws it over a chair. He has to sit right across from Tyrion to get within the circle of lamplight.

His brother’s mind works just a little bit faster than other people’s. The software he runs on is a little bit sharper, and before you can quite get a statement out, he is already replying. He gets bored of the formality of all these extra words and niceties. He doesn’t quite realize how obnoxious this is. As a result, Jaime never needs to say much. Tyrion will have most of the conversation without him.

“You don’t believe them,” Tyrion surmises, pushing his papers aside. An ill-fitting pair of glasses slides down the end of his scarred nose, and he has to catch them before they can fall off. Even Lannisters have troubles with eyewear these days. “I know you think she’s indestructible.”

“Near indestructible.” Insolently, Jaime puts his feet up on his brother’s nice mahogany desk, which used to be their father’s nice mahogany desk. Something about this room makes him act like a rebellious teenager. “It will take more than an amateur disk jockey passing on rumors to convince me.”

“True, rumors have been wrong before. I’ve heard that you were dead too, when you rode the Kingsroad.”

They don’t speak much of that time. Tyrion hated that Jaime abandoned the family to serve as a glorified mailman for five years, as he calls it. Escorting people and messages across the dangerous countryside in the early days of the Disaster might have made his name, and eventually added to the family’s renown, but this personal betrayal his brother has never forgiven. What he really hates, of course, is that Jaime left him alone with their father. 

Jaime lets it pass, jokes with him. “I probably started that rumor myself, at least once.”

“Don’t let this distract you,” he says. Tyrion’s mismatched eyes go back to his ledgers meaningfully. “Running Lannisport is enough work, without you running off all the time. We’re trying to bring the Riverlands into the fold. I need you on task, not obsessing over a girl.”

Jaime snorts. Tyrion can hardly lecture him on distractions. Little he may be, he has no trouble acquiring female companionship. He seems to have a different lady on his arm every time Jaime comes around. Sometimes two. 

Tyrion rolls his eyes. “Don’t start. My girls are different. I’m not mooning around after them years after they’re gone. When I lose one, I find another. You need another woman, Jaime.”

“With me running off all the time? Who’s going to tolerate that?” Jaime is bored of this conversation already. They’ve had it many times before. 

“Romantics. That’s who. You’re off risking your life to join the old nation together again, you’re a dashing hero. Plus the whole Kingsroad adventure. Women love that. You could be swimming in girls if you spared them half a glance. It’s been five years, Jaime.” 

“Four,” Jaime corrects him. Four years, three months, and eleven-or-so days. 

Tyrion says this more solemnly, looking over his glasses, “If the rumor isn’t true this time, someday it will be.”

He looks very much like their father when he does that, which is unwelcome. Jaime snatches his feet off the desk and wanders away to find something to eat, the big Lannister mansion resounding emptily around him. 

He manages to avoid his brother until he can head out again - he rarely passes more than a night at a time in this house. He checks for messages, refills his supplies, gets a proper shower, all of which he can do in a few hours. Such safety he finds oddly uncomfortable, if he lingers too long. He’ll be leaving the next day, and out the door before Tyrion is even out of his bed. 

The traveling, on the other hand, takes an age. Not even he travels very fast these days. The armored car, which is more of a delivery truck, doesn’t get over 50kph, and shudders and lurches at the upper end. Real petrol might perk up his engine, but petrol is rare these days, and he can refuel the biodiesel at most settlements now. So he drives slowly and is on the road almost constantly, and stops at Casterly Rock as infrequently as he can manage. 

Soon Jaime is hearing the same rumor everywhere, in snatches. He travels through the guarded and gated villages of the Riverlands on a regular circuit, drives through miles of nothing between aettlements, edging around clusters of Others that still live beyond the city lights. As he exchanges goods, messages, and information, he hears of the Blue Angel. Edges of conversation, news bulletins, idle conversation with gasoline sellers. His hosts at Pennytree gossip over it at dinner while passing around the green beans.

Did you hear about the Blue Angel? Damn shame. 

Jaime always agrees wordlessly. People still like to feed him, remembering his own time guarding the Kingsroad in the beginning of the new era. He hasn’t been the Slayer in four years, has been a politician-cum-envoy for far longer than he ever battled the Others, but he is far better known still for the former. Arguing with his hosts would be pointless. He just finishes his meal, salvaged canned goods heated over a campfire out back. In those early days, this would have been a feast. It’s still pretty good now. Vegetables are more and more scarce.

No one seems to know exactly what happened. He hears a few variations on it; the tale is different each time. Turned by the Others, haunting the Kingsroad where once she had been its protector. Crushed in the fall of a skyscraper in the Eyrie. Slain in battle protecting a school full of orphans from robbers. The details are in debate, but there is a consistent center. The Blue Angel is dead. It's a rumor still, but one with all the authority of the old King’s Landing Times newspaper, of truth. Everyone is sure.

But they don’t know her. Not like Jaime did. If they knew her they would not believe it so easily. They would need evidence. They would need a body, a grave. Otherwise it's just not realistic that she could be gone. He is not worried. He’s not.

Tyrion passes on the same news the next time he’s at the house. No particulars, but the same word from his own channels of information. No one knows how, but the Blue Angel is dead. 

Jaime has little patience for it now. Without any details, it’s still only a rumor. A remarkably consistent one, to be sure. But not enough to know for certain. He doesn’t even stop in the office, claiming exhaustion, avoiding conversation. 

Tyrion finds him anyway. 

“If you really wanted to know, you could ask The Spider.” His brother suggests late one night, startling him awake. “He could give you the whole story.”

Jaime had been dozing in an armchair in his own study, unwilling to go to bed and too tired to stay awake. He rubs at his left eye and yawns. “What time is it? You’re the only person I know who still wears a wristwatch.”

Tyrion looks worried. He stands there a long time waiting for him to answer.

“I don’t want to know,” Jaime mumbles sleepily. “Really I don’t.”

“Try to get some sleep, Jaime.”

In the bathroom mirror he has a few more gray hairs than before, visible even in candlelight. Before long there will be more gray than blond. He pulls them out one at a time. 

It’s too bad he can’t pluck the laugh lines away from his eyes the same way. He hasn’t laughed in a long time now. They feel unearned.

Everywhere he goes for a week solid, it's a funeral. Holly branches along the road, and stray, somehow-preserved flowers. Bars full of black coated mourners, drinking morosely.

It irritates him. Makes him grind his teeth. He shouldn’t resent these people. He knows it’s irrational to feel this way. But what do they know? How dare they mourn? What have they lost? A legend, a leader, a hero? They don’t know the woman behind the stories. She is so much more than that. 

For some reason it is the graffiti that finally gets to him. Seeing it written gives it permanence. Someone felt the need to document this, on a building, for all to see. First in an alley in Riverrun - written in an electric blue that seems to float over the dull brick of the building. “Blue Angel RIP,” it says, and it sears into Jaime’s vision. He sees it every time he closes his eyes. 

Before long the makeshift walls around Raventree are covered in mismatched sprays of blue, the neat and professional swoops of seasoned graffiti artists alongside the amateur efforts of random passers by, all offering their tributes. At the center of them all is a portrait, as detailed as an oil painting rendered in spray paint, of the Blue Angel’s long cloaked form standing over smaller figures in protection. She’s holding her favorite weapon, a solid titanium baseball bat. 

He stares at this portrait for a long time. It’s very good. She must have passed this way at some point. You can’t see her face, but she mostly keeps it covered anyway. This artist captures the way she stands, the gesture of her long, elegant fingers. This artist saw her, at least once, for certain.

It’s so strange. All of these people feel like they know her, that she belongs to them. And it’s true in a way. The Blue Angel belongs to everyone, she really does. But Brienne... Brienne belongs to a very few, if anyone, and if anyone then he is certainly one of them. And he knows she cannot possibly be dead. He knows it.

He stares at the graffiti portrait until his vision blurs and he can’t see anything anymore.

Jaime cuts off the rest of his circuit after that. Drives back to the Rock, as slowly and deliberately as ever, always watching for Others that he could be leading to the compound. In the house he stays only an hour. Packs a small bag and leaves the keys to the car on Tyrion’s desk, along with all his dossiers on the Riverlands, and his appointment book. 

Then he takes out his motorbike and drives it across the Riverlands, wastes precious petrol cruising the old highways dodging the snarls of abandoned cars. Tries to outrun the news. The wind blasts through him like a cold knife. He uses up one of his few remaining chargeables to get an mp3 player playing again, painfully loud, the heaviest music he can find. Hailstorms of guitar riffs assaulting him through the earpiece. He rides until his face is numb from wind and his nerves are rattled and brittle.

The Spider’s lair moves between rest stops these days. King’s Landing is still too dangerous, overrun with Others, and he likes to be off the map. Jaime checks a dozen highway offramps before he comes across the black RVs he is looking for.

He leaves the bike some distance away, as is the custom. The sound of a motorbike will bring Others running from miles away, and it’s impolite to lead zombies to people’s front door. Jaime walks the last mile in darkness, quiet as he can. He should have brought more weapons than a single pistol. He didn’t really think this through. But if the Others came to investigate the bike, he does not encounter them walking south, and before long the pavement opens out into a runaway truck ramp and a parking lot, and he can feel eyes on him from the line of trees beyond.

The Spider’s gang greets him with guns cocking, friendly as always. Black leather gargoyles. When they emerge from the shadows into the moonlight, Jaime puts his hands up and drops down to his knees. He waits for them to decide whether he can approach or if he has to move on and try again another night. He doesn’t hear them talking, but they communicate somehow, silently. He’s determined, over the years, that they use some kind of hand signals, but he’s never caught them doing it. 

The mobile home is painted black, and it’s almost invisible in the night. The Spider doesn’t take visitors in the daytime. The gun at his back pokes him directly up to the door.

On the inside, the trailer is flooded with fluorescent lighting of the kind rarely seen anymore. After years of lanterns and lamps, it looks otherworldly. Dreamlike. The Spider, in his silk robe, seems to gleam in the artificial light, reclining on his cushion-covered couch.

“Slayer,” he says mildly, gestures for Jaime to sit in a chair opposite him. “It’s been some time. What brings you to--”

“If you know anything,” Jaime tells him flatly, staying where he is just inside the door, “you know why I am here.”

Varys looks at him with cool, calculating assessment. His bald head shines thoughtfully.

“I do. But do sit down, you’re upsetting my birds.” In their cages all around the room, crows shudder and caw. Their black eyes stare unblinkingly at the intruder. The bald little man gestures again to a cushioned seat welded into the trailer.

Jaime acquiesces only enough to take a few steps further into the trailer, standing over the Spider’s chaise lounge. Varys shrugs him off, not remotely threatened. He smiles up from his comfortable position as though it’s a deck chair at a beach, and Jaime is there to take his drinks order.

“That is a fine prosthetic you have there. I would never have known, if I didn’t know everything. The color is perfect, just perfect. Which one is it, right or left?"

The Spider doesn’t really expect him to answer. He knows that Jaime has kept a tight lid on that detail, so far. There are certainly people out there in the world who know for certain, and he will surely find out eventually, but the Spider has not gotten any of them to talk just yet. He will fish for the information just the same. It’s a reflex, at this point. 

"Where in the world did you get it? I didn’t think they made things like this anymore, not to custom. But you’re a wealthy man again, aren’t you? Even after Armageddon, Lannisters stay rich.” The spider shows a sliver of teeth. “You would think that money and influence would mean nothing in the new world, but it isn’t so. We simply deal in different currencies now. Your brother realized that faster than most. Clever man.”

Jaime remains standing. 

The Spider’s fingers drum his seat warily. “I, of course, recall how you helped me to escape King’s Landing. Have you come to call in this debt?”

“Is she dead?” He spits out the words like he will not taste their poison if he is rid of them quickly enough.

Varys hesitates. Just for a moment, but it is enough to make Jaime blanch well ahead of his answer.

“Yes. Without a doubt.”

Jaime’s throat tightens around the word. “How?”

“How else? The Others.”

Jaime takes one more breath, and chokes on it. He can’t get any more words out. 

He turns and slaps his palms against the door of the trailer so that it bangs open and he is out into the freezing night again, running, past the blurry borders of the rest-stop and into proper forest, and when he cannot run anymore he drops to his hands and knees in the mud and opens his mouth and wails until he has no voice left. 

His fists beat into the earth as though he can make it give her back.

When there’s nothing left inside him he gets up. Stumbles unseeing back through the forest. Raw and shaking, he pushes through Varys’ honor guard of former bikers, back into the Spider’s Lair.

Varys has not moved since he left him. He watches Jaime drop down into the chair opposite him as though it were only moments since he gave his terrible answer. 

“Would you like to ask for your boon now?” the Spider asks. 

“Yes.” Jaime leans forward. “I need weapons.”

***

Let me hold you in my arms dear

And let me melt in the heat of your gaze

And let the clock strike one,

Time and mind go marching on

Let our sense of selves decay

It was there that I saw you

In the heat of a summer's embrace

But as time went on

I wondered what went wrong

I wondered what became of you

“It Was There That I Saw You”, ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead

[aomine-ryo]

Kind of late, but I had an idea for a fic that’s been in my drafts for a while and I wanted to post it for Kise’s birthday but it wasn’t quite done yet. But it is now, so here it is, hope you like it!

Scenario: New kid, Kise Ryouta ends up falling for the reader

gender neutral reader

It’s not particularly easy being the new kid at school. Especially if you were Kise Ryouta. Being a well known athlete and model, it was difficult for him to be able to find friends in a new place that didn’t have ulterior motives. However, Kise learned to deal with it. He was cold to people until he himself learned to respect them and understand their motives.

But the problem with him was not in the friendship category, but rather the romance one.

Kise had a tendency to fall for the first person that was nice to him in a new place, and that almost always ended in the other person using him. So this time, he promised himself that he was not going to hurt himself yet again.

On his first day, Kise stood at the front of the class and introduced himself. “Um, hi, nice to meet you, I’m Kise Ryouta. I look forward to getting to know you all and well, I don’t really know what else to say,” he said, turning to the teacher for some help. The class filled with a small chatter once he stopped talking, and he could already faintly hear comments about how ‘cute’ he looks.

“It’s alright Kise. You can take that empty seat next to Y/N over there,” the teacher said, pointing.

Your head snapped back to the front of the class from gazing out the window at the sound of your name. Of course the new kid got stuck in the seat next to you. He was cute, you couldn’t disagree. However, that only meant that everyone else was going to be swarming around your desk for a while.

The teacher went on with the regular announcements until the bell for first period rang. “Oh right, before I forget, Y/N, can I trust you to show Kise around the school during your break?” she added.

You held back a sigh as you nodded. “Sure,” you replied curtly, glancing over at Kise and giving him an awkward smile.

As expected, once the teacher left, he was soon surrounded by girls asking him questions that were borderline invasive. How do they do it? How do they simply have the courage to speak to people like that? In a way, you envied them for their confidence, but it was also quite pathetic.

Eventually, the break came around and Kise approached your desk with a polite smile. Why did he get stuck with you out of all people? You were the first one that caught his eye and Kise could already see himself catching feelings for you. But he made a promise to himself and he was going to keep it. He wasn’t going to get played with again.

“Hey, um, Y/N, right?” who was he kidding? He knew your name. It was stuck in his head ever since the teacher instructed him to sit next to you.

“Yeah, just give me a second, I just have to organise this mess and we’ll be on our way,” you said, fumbling with the stationery that was cluttering your desk.

“Oh, you don’t really have to give me that tour if you don’t want to. I don’t want to be a burden— I can probably figure things out myself,” Kise said.

“It’s alright, I don’t mind helping out. If you end up getting lost at some point I’ll feel bad,” you insisted, finally putting the last of your things away and standing up. “Okay, we’re all good. Shall we?”

Kise hesitated for a moment. He really didn’t want to do this, but he didn’t have any more excuses so he simply walked by your side.

You showed him all the classes that he would regularly be attending, adding a few tips that you learned through the years whenever you could. This was the most you’d ever spoken to someone who wasn’t a close friend and yet Kise remained rather silent. Did he think you were boring? Were you talking too much? God, why did you have to be assigned this task?

“Oh right, I almost forgot. Are you joining any clubs?” you asked him as you walked through the halls.

“Yeah, I’ll be joining the basketball club,” Kise nodded.

“Right, I figured,” you mumbled, making Kise let out a small chuckle.

“Hey, you might have made the right judgement this time, but don’t judge a book by its cover,” Kise joked.

“It was more of an intuition thing rather than judging you, I swear,” you replied defensively, holding back a giggle.

“Mhmm I’m sure it was,” he said sarcastically. He hated how bright your smile was. It was so warm and gentle, he could look at it all day. He barely even knew you, but he was already obsessed with your smile. Just his luck.

“Well, unfortunately for you, I’m the manager for the basketball team so you’ll be seeing a lot more of me.”

This had to be some sort of cruel joke. “Really? That’s great. So I could probably just tail behind you and not get lost by the looks of it.”

“Maybe,” you shrugged. You hoped he was joking. The last thing you needed was a bunch of fangirls trailing you around campus. “Let me show you the way to the basketball gym though, just in case I manage to escape you.”

“Escape me? Tired of me already huh?” Kise teased, dramatically pretending to be offended.

“Absolutely,” you joked.

Kise clasped a hand over his heart as though he got shot in the chest. “I am hurt, Y/N. What did I ever do to deserve this?” he recited.

“You know, the drama club is probably also looking for new members— I should show you their club room instead,” you retorted.

“Ha ha very funny,” Kise rolled his eyes. How were you two already joking around like this? He tried not to speak to you much, but it was like his charisma was forced out of him. Maybe he was overthinking it. You seemed nice. Maybe the two of you could be good friends.

And well, that’s pretty much exactly what happened. With the sheer amount of times you two see each other, it was no surprise that you’d become friends. It started with witty banter and random comments but soon, the two of you became close. After about three months, you were hanging out with each other every other day, going out for a bite after practice, going to the movies, walking to school together— the list goes on. And somehow, you never got tired of each other.

“Hey, Y/N-cchi, are you going for the field trip?” Kise asked you in between classes, referring to the yearly trip your school organises to a selected place in the country with a rich history.

“I’ll go if you do. But to be honest, I’d rather stay at home,” you replied.

“Well, we’re going then. It’ll be fun. There’s probably cute places to take pictures for Instagram,” Kise said.

“So I’m basically going to be your photographer?” you sighed.

“Precisely.”

“Sounds like a blast,” you groaned.

“I’m kidding, I will find a way to make this worthwhile. I heard that there’s a nice restaurant near the hotel we’re staying at, so we should pay that a visit,” Kise said.

“I’m exhausted just thinking about it,” you replied, resting your head on your palm.

“Shhh it’ll be fun, trust me,” Kise said, eyes softening up when he noticed how the sunlight that shone through the window landed on you like some sort of natural spotlight. His mind was about to wander off into a daydream when the teacher walked into the classroom, snapping his attention away from you.

The field trip finally rolled around and you found yourself in a fresh hotel room with a gorgeous view of the beach. Unfortunately, you didn’t get assigned to room with Kise, but it was alright since he was just a few doors down. As promised, Kise did his best to make sure you were having fun. You did have to take an awful lot of pictures of him, and sometimes he’d force you to take pictures with him, but Kise was always good company so you didn’t mind too much.

On the last night, Kise took you to that restaurant for dinner. “It’s kind of a fancy restaurant so we should dress up,” Kise informed you that afternoon.

“But that’s so tiring. Let’s just go to McDonalds instead,” you suggested.

“We are not going to McDonalds. I will dress you up myself if I have to,” Kise said firmly.

So in the end, you did end up dressing up, but you didn’t pack any nice shoes so you had to go with your sneakers. Of course, Kise patronised you for it, but you just replied with the wittiest comment you could think of, like always.

“Hi, I made a reservation here, for Kise Ryouta,” Kise said to the hostess.

The place was nicer than you expected it to be. It was a strange feeling being here with a reservation. It felt less like a hang out with your friend and more like a date. And for some reason, you were now nervous.

“Ah yes, right this way Mr Kise,” she said with a polite smile as she led you two to your table. “A window seat, just as you requested.”

“Perfect, thank you,” Kise said, glancing at the view of the night sky and the twinkling city lights below.

“Here are your menus, a waiter will be with you shortly. Enjoy your date,” she smiled.

“Oh, uh, it’s not a—” you began, but she walked off before you could correct her.

“Well that’s awkward,” Kise chuckled.

You simply sighed in defeat as you took a moment to admire your surroundings. There was a clean white cloth spread across your table with a candle and flowers as a centrepiece. It was a bit too romantic for your comfort, but you tried to shake it off. “Someone went all out for a simple dinner. You even requested a table by the window. How picky can you get?” You said teasingly.

“I just made a reservation in case this place would be busy. You wouldn’t want to wait in line would you?” Kise explained and you shook your head in response. “Exactly. And I got the window seat because I know you like to stare out sometimes. I figured you wouldn’t wanna stare at me all night long, so I got you a better view.”

You felt your stomach turn as your mind’s immediate thought was how Kise was enough of a view on his own. You had to admit, he looked fantastic that night— when he said he was going to dress up, he wasn’t kidding. It was a simple white button up shirt with a red tie, but he still looked dashing. Perhaps it was the fact that he rolled up his sleeves to his elbows, showcasing his toned forearms that pulled the look together. Either way, you didn’t like the fact that you were viewing your friend in such a way.

“Oh my, what is this self deprecation? I thought I was hanging out with model and Generation of Miracles member, Kise Ryouta, not some emo teenager,” you said, your tone resembling Kise’s dramatic one that you’ve heard a thousand times before.

“Well, if you’re not going to appreciate my effort of getting us these seats, I can just ask them to move us away from the window,” Kise huffed.

“No, no,” you tracked back almost immediately. “I like the window. Thank you.”

“That’s what I thought,” Kise grinned triumphantly.

That night was absolutely lovely. But no matter now hard he tried, Kise couldn’t take his eyes off you. As expected, you’d rest your chin on your palm and gaze out the window with a faraway look in your eyes, and Kise could do nothing but admire how beautiful you looked. He couldn’t believe that he knew someone as amazing as you were. Moreover, he couldn’t believe that he told himself that he wouldn’t fall for you. What a dumb decision. But he was already this far in, maybe it was just that fact that he can’t have you that made him want you more. These feelings will pass, right?

As the two of you walked back to the hotel that night, a cool salty breeze flowed through the air. Kise had made you laugh yet again, and his heart filled with joy as the bright smile returned to your face. He could stay in this moment forever.

“I can’t believe this is our last night here,” Kise sighed once you simmered down.

“Yeah, this trip was actually kinda fun. I wish it didn’t end so soon,” you said, gazing up at the bright full moon.

“You think we can squeeze in one final adventure tomorrow morning?” Kise questioned.

“Where to?”

Kise shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“Well then, I’d rather stay in and sleep thank you very much,” you said.

“Are you tired yet?”

“Not really.”

“Then let’s go walk along the beach,” Kise suggested.

“But the sand gets everywhere, it’s so annoying,” you frowned.

“It’s our last night. Come on,” Kise said, grabbing your wrist and dragging you towards the empty beach.

The two of you walked by the water where the sand was firmer so that it less tedious. It was quite peaceful hearing the waves crash against the shore as the water glimmered under the moonlight.

“You know, when I first met you, I really didn’t wanna be your friend,” Kise said out of the blue.

“How rude,” you faked a gasp as you playfully whacked his arm, making him chuckle. “But to be honest, me neither.”

Kise looked at you with a dumbfounded expression. “Seriously, Y/N-cchi? But why?” he whined, seeming much more offended than you were.

“Because you always had people following you around and I didn’t want to be caught up in that,” you explained, kicking a pebble around as you walked.

“Oh,” Kise said, realising he probably shouldn’t have said anything because he couldn’t explain his reason as rationally as you did. “That’s fair, I guess.”

“Why didn’t you wanna be friends with me? Was I annoying?”

“What do you mean, you still are annoying,” Kise joked, earning himself another whack on the arm. “I’m kidding, no you weren’t annoying.”

“Then what was it?”

“Okay, this might sound really stupid, but I told myself that I wouldn’t go after the first person that’s nice to me, because that always ended up with people using me for something or the other,” Kise explained, stopping in his tracks to pick up a smooth pebble.

“That’s fair,” you said, trying not to overthink what he meant by ‘go after’ as you watched him skip the pebble over the waves.

Kise looked out at the horizon, seemingly lost in thought for a moment before turning back to face you. “You know, you caught my eye almost immediately and that was a red flag to me for the longest time, but you actually turned out to be pretty cool.”

It was strange seeing Kise like this. It was like he was possessed. He never speaks in such a serious manner with you. “Well duh, because I’m awesome like that,” you joked, trying to lighten the mood.

A gentle smile spread across Kise’s face. “I told myself I wouldn’t fall for the first person I had a crush on, but here I am,” Kise let out a heavy sigh, glancing back out at the ocean for a moment.

“Crush? You had a crush on me?” you asked, your stomach doing twists and turns that made you feel as though you were going to throw up all the delicious food you had earlier.

“Yeah,” Kise muttered. What was he saying? Why was he complicating things? “I hate myself for it.”

“Oh. Um, it’s okay,” you said, unsure what to say. He clearly didn’t want to like you, so you didn’t want to bring up how you felt about him. “We can stay friends if you want, nothing has to change.”

Kise looked back at you, finding comfort in the warmth of your eyes. There was no dramatic outburst like he expected. You seemed to be considerate of his feelings. You genuinely did care for him. “I don’t mind staying friends. But is it okay if I do this?”

Before you could think twice about it, Kise had his soft lips pressed against yours. Even though your mind hadn’t fully wrapped itself around the situation, you found yourself kissing him back. Kise felt you melt into his touch as his heart skipped like pebbles on the water. God knows how much Kise had been longing for this moment. To have his arms around your waist, your body pressed against his, and his lips on yours. He could finally get a taste of you and it was better than any meal he could imagine. This just felt right.

After a few moments, Kise pulled back to catch his breath, his mind racing with thoughts that he couldn’t even keep up with. “I’m sorry,” was the only thing he could muster.

“Don’t apologise,” you shook your head, taking his hand in yours and squeezing it tightly. “I am absolutely okay with that.”

A wide smile spread across Kise’s face as his mind slowly began to clear up. Maybe his instincts were right this time. You were perfect to him the moment he laid his eyes on you, even though he tried to deny it. And as you stood in front of Kise with the moonlight glittering in your eyes, you were just as perfect as the day he met you.