#hate to break it to you guys but 90% of fictional characters are fictional and dont act like people irl ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[gothteddiesdotcom]

I think that part of what like. kills me about the whole media literacy and critical thinking aspect of enjoying media these days is that people refuse to like. contextualize that

A. Bad media can still hold significant meaning to people

B. Media made for a demographic you aren’t apart of is not inherently bad media

C. Media made for and consumed by the opposite demographic is not inherently shallow or flawed nor is it above criticism for its media tropes either.

[cosmerelists]

Cosmere Characters: What Type of Halloween Candy They'd Be

Happy Halloween! Last year, Cosmere characters dressed up. This year, I'm going to compare them to candy. Who knows what will happen next year?

Anyway, here's what type of candy I think each of them would be!

1. Szeth: Jawbreaker

Yes, this is a joke about his bald head.

2. Elend: Nerds

Yes, this is a joke about how Elend is a big nerd.

3. Siri: Skittles

They are a rainbow, just like Siri's hair!

4. Shallan: Three Musketeers

One candy. Three musketeers. Shallan.

5. Ham: Tootsie Pop

The tagline "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop" is a quasi-philosophical question that we as kids really felt was important. Ham loves debating shit. My wife says no one will remember this slogan because it's from the 90s but I was a kid then and I'm doing it.

6. Vin: Warhead

It's a weapon of mass destruction in candy form.

7. Kaladin: Kit Kat

A candy made to be broken in half. The tag line (from the 90s again probably shut up) is "Give me a break." But no one gives Kaladin a break. He just gets...broken.

8. Wayne: 100 Grand

First slogan: "Tastes so good it's almost illegal!" Second slogan: "That's rich!" Wayne: likes to steal, like recreationally, but not like in an illegal-illegal way. Then he gets Super Rich. Look, it makes sense in my head.

9. Steris: Homemade caramel apples

Steris doesn't do anything halfway. The caramel is homemade too.

10. Lift: Sour Patch Kids

I think Lift would be a candy with "kid" in the name. You know, because she's never going to grow up.

11. Renarin: Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

The slogan I know is "There's no wrong way to eat a Reese's." And Renarin is a guy who likes to go his own way.

12. Leshwi: M&Ms

Hard outer shell (=crab lady) + delicious cholate interior (=Leshwi is sweet) and then there's slogan about how it m-melts in your m-mouth not in your hand.... Ha ha did it get hot in here or is it just me?

13. Dalinar: Twix

It's a candy that is a BONDED pair. I tried.

14. Adolin: Lindor Truffle

I felt that Adolin should be chocolate: solid, dependable, comforting. But, like, a fancy chocolate. Rich. Higher quality. That sort of thing.

15. Raoden: Snickers

Slogan (current, for once!): "You're not you when you're hungry." And, you know, as a person with the Shaod and an all-consuming hunger...

16. Moash: Candy Corn

People who hate candy corn: "Candy corn is the WORST thing to have EVER happened in the UNIVERSE and anybody who likes it is PROBABLY SICK AND TWISTED."

People who like candy corn: "It sucks! I love it so much."

(I like candy corn.)

17. Kelsier: Everlasting Gobstopper

My original joke: Because it survives forever!

My current joke: Holy shit I really thought this was a real candy but apparently it is a fictional candy from Willy Wonka that was later made into a real candy? Only the fictional candy really did last forever but of course the real candy doesn't; it's just a story.

That's somehow even more Kelsier.

18. Nale: Floss

There's always the one house that hands out floss, to remind the children that life is not about fun candy, it's about Responsibility. That's Nale.

[axelzp]

Face it: how often is that "OC" you write or read about probably just an SI without metaknowledge? Same difference really, and if we're willing to love them, we can love SI's as well.

(Just gonna hijack this to recommend my faves):

Pound The Table

Marvel SI; setting where heroes begin appearing during the 90s

Limited metaknowledge, familiar with broad strokes and characters, but no real ability to predict the future

A NY lawyer (written by an actual lawyer), navigates the rise of heroics, further complicated by her history and relationships with a few of them, as well as her identity as Jewish, lesbian, and a mutant

Chains Adventurous - Dimensions in Time

Doctor Who: Season 2 onward, with ‘multicross’ elements from the SI’s previous travels

Near complete metaknowledge, albeit hampered by the future changing in a setting with a time travelling protagonist; not prepared for everything

Woman involved in a Jumpchain, a series of “Choose Your Own Adventure” type modules that see her gain power, abilities, items, and companions through traveling fictional settings; she’s seen some shit, gone through some shit, and is now traveling with the 10th Doctor and Rose, which ends up being very emotional draining for all three of them

This Bites!

One Piece, including various tie-in video games, spin-off manga and light novels, filler episodes and films

SI has near total knowledge of the series up to the end of Dressrosa arc, with no knowledge of film events

SI and his talking, Devil-Fruit empowered snail phone, take a spot on the Going Merry shortly before Loguetown, using their knowledge to manipulate and influence various pirates and Marines in their bid to help the Straw Hats bypass more serious dangers, only to find himself increasingly taking a revolutionary stance against the World Government; canon is pretty close up to the end of Alabasta, then everything afterward is the same but in very different ways (usually arcs begin going easier for the Straw Hats before swerving to just as hard if not harder challenges than canon)

Evil Eyes

Naruto, canon start

SI has knowledge of the series…the first one; no knowledge of Shippuden or past, other than glimpses from other fanfiction

Rather…disturbed man wakes up as Sasuke Uchiha in the aftermath of the clan massacre and proceeds to try (and repeatedly fail) to escape the plot, whenever he’s no doing a lot of internal monologue and narration (make or break of this fic, honestly), being consistently annoyed by the sensei he hates and the teammates he hates even more (story isn’t Sakura-unfriendly, so much as the protagonist is; it mellows out after a while), or figuring out ways to ‘jailbreak’ the magic system as best he can

Sublight Drive

Star Wars Legends/Canon, elements and events taken and altered for sake of entertainment

SI has rough memories of the films and sibling’s ranting, but no EU knowledge, including the Clone Wars series

An officer of the Separatist’s navy takes a chance to assume command of a fleet to turn around a pivotal battle, and from this and his previous actions, begins setting the course for the mad alliance of corporations, Republic dissidents, and the various military officers amongst them to turn the tide and stand a chance of winning the Clone Wars

Assimilation

Young Justice, expanded to include various other DC aspects and characters

SI has familiarity with DC comics and other animated series, but not YJ and the way it significantly changes various histories and character beats

Young man turned into shapeshifting mass of nanomachines escapes alien prison with fellow captive Starfire, arriving on Earth to eventually join the Team; canon goes off rails, man struggles with unclear nature and origins, and a romantic subplot actually reaches a relationship point midway though the story

Fate/Noble Shade

Fate/stay night, with various sequels in spin-offs such as Apocrphya and Extra

SI, or rather FI (friend-insert), has absolutely no knowledge of the setting, and is being guided through the narrative like a DnD campaign by the authro/dungeon master ‘luckychaos’

Local Canadian man becomes fused with ghost of a Persian assassin, and must navigate the Holy Grail War’s various interwoven schemes and gambits

The Most Evil Trainer

Pokemon X/Y, Kalos region, with some intense worldbuilding and expansion of the setting (like any proper Pokemon fic finds itself doing)

SI has knowledge of the original game’s plot beats and the setting in general

Pokemon trainer’s journey to win the tournament, become an Elite Trainer, and use the provided opportunities and resources to return to his world; internal struggle revolving around the friends, human and Pokemon, he makes along the way coupled with increasing involvement in the struggles and conflicts of Kalos

Caught Some Place in Time

Battletech, Draconis Combine planet, just before the Clan Invasion

SI has significant knowledge of the two settings (or rather, one setting and one out-of-context mech)

Man awakens in a bunker next to a Gundam SEED series GAT-X102 Duel Gundam, in a setting of rather more grounded mecha, on a sci-fi Imperial Japan planet; increasingly trips, falls, and survives various conflicts between gangsters, soldiers, evil space priests and an invasion of tank-born, honor obsessed clone soldiers

Gold Variation

Star Wars, roughly a decade before The Phantom Menace; a recursive fanfic, taking place around the same time the events of Fate Denied are occurring, though requires little to no familiarity with the original fic)

SI has limited metaknowledge, particularly muddled with the presence of another SI

Republic Judicial Force pilot w/squadron comedy, romance, and eldritch haunting whispers of a godlike monster from Star Wars Hell

The stigma of self-inserts is so harmful to the creative process. Relax. Admit it. Everything you make is derivative of yourself, always, no exceptions. You can turn the mirror into tinier and tinier shards or you can make it as big as you want to reflect as much as you want. At the end of the day it's always going to show you inside of it. Pretending otherwise is stupid.

[trutrustories]

Okay, this will be probably long and with many errors (my english isn´t very good) But I saw several posts here on Lokius tag, talking about this ship as result of gay fetish, and about non existing chemistry and  how this ship doesn´t make sense etc… And from what I understood there is tagged Lokius because of genuine interest to understand others point of view, so here is mine: I wil try to explain where my frustration comes from, and how I feel about Lokius, Sylkie, AND representation + some other things which I saw here somewhere. But first of all: I like Sylvie, I don´t hate sylkie shipers, and after so many years reading fan fictions, I don´t mind selfcest – I read weirder things. I have some issues with this ship (the mainlythe fact that it isn´t Lokius), but  this is not one of them. Also, I am not about to tell anyone, they shouldn´t ship sylkie.Ship whatever. And I LOVED the show as a whole. 

I just want to defend my standpoint, that Lokius does make sense, people shipping it does make sense and whether it will happen or not, (I don´t have my hopes very high, and I learned to be very skeptical in this regard ) it is more than just about crack ship, or fetish. I´m honestly blown away that people are still surprised that this ship became a thing :D First of all, let´s look at some romantic story telling and tropes: I mean the way they introduced them in the first two episodes set the tone for all series and how the heck this isn´t romantic? Somehow there are all these romantic tropes existing in a show. They´re just there. Just chilling between Loki and Mobius and large portion of audience can´t even see them. (and some of those tropes were used for Sylki as well, so you could actually see them side by side)

For example: 1) traveling to the apocalypsis 2) breaking law/rules for the other 3) literally changing for the better thanks to the other 4) arguing like old married couple 5) saying secrets, personal things to the other 6) sharing glances, touches, visibly being happy around each other - in case of Loki happier then we´ve ever seen him before 7) being completely themselfs around each other 8) One knowing everything (even the worst) about other and still accepting him completely 9) teasing, being comfortable and domestic around each other 10) one being literally enthusiastic FAN of the other 11) Mobius defending Loki whenever he has a chance 12) Freaking amnesia trope that they pulled of in the end??? (It could be different Mobius, but point is he suddenly doesn´t know him - and Loki knows more, in contrast with the beggining) 13) the jealousy in ep4 14) Misunderstanding - when Mobius thought Loki betrayed him and Loki (thanks to Ravonna) thought Mobius betrayed him... 15) witnessing death of the other and being absolutely broken afterwards 16) The goodbye hug with romantic music in the backround 17) Saving life of the one (even when it means problems for the other ) - like Mobius saved Loki´s ass at least three times when he was trying to stop others from pruning him. 18) sharing deep conversations about meanings of life, freedom and how it would be fun to make some chaos and ride that fucking jet ski!!! 19) Inspiring the other 20) looking for each other (Mobius didn´t believe for a second, that Loki would die in the Void and the way how in the last minutes of the series Loki run through all places they were together when he was looking for Mobius... and I could go on. Point is, even if they are not planning to make Lokius canon, all these things are used on a daily basis to describe romance in media and they are used here. On top of that it´s just very poetic and cute, that this drama queen and powerful god of Asgard who looked down on people would find his match in someone, who is so quiet, ordinary on the first sight, and basically is just human from 90s, who loves jet skis. Mobius can´t even fight. But is highly inteligent and he also happen to be as good manipulator, such as Loki himself. - That´s why they work together so well. Mobius sees right through him and once Loki understands that, he drops his evil persona. Almost nobody expected to ship it for real. But story itself and chemistry between them just made it probably the most exciting duo in the whole MCU. And I mean it genuinely. Third episode, even though it was beautiful and Sophie was great in it (and is literally dipped in bisexual colors), is the least favorite for a reason. And that reason being, there is no interaction between Loki and Mobius whatsoever. Lot´s of people though that series slowed down a bit. Even when in fact there was more action, then when we watched Loki and Mobius working at the TVA.

(and let´s just talk about evil!Mobius narative for a bit and how some people say he is manipulative and toxic for Loki: show itself explore heavy themes and one of them is in Loki´s line: no one bad is ever truly bad and no one good is ever truly good. And as a theme in a fictional world, it is working as it should, for the  story. When Loki and Mobius meet, one of them just killed lots of innocent people and destroyed almost whole city. The other one is a part of fascist organization – and in the beginning of the series they both believe what they´re doing is right. They´re both bad, they´re both good, they´re both broken. And they are changing with the help of the other.) From all reactions I watched - and there was many of them, lots of people actually didn´t see dynamic between Loki and Sylvie as romantic in the third episode. So it´s not like Sylvie and Loki had unequivocally love story right from the start.

The only difference is that lots of people won´t see romantic tropes, when it comes to two men in a mainstream show – show that isn´t primarily about relationships and problems that queer people has to face. Because in super hero story and science fiction we have to warn audience, that they´re about to watch two man in love, right? At this point It´s just frustrating really. There were many M/M dynamics that used similar story line, as for example Lucifer, or X-files, or Bone collectors. -  But unlike those M/M pairings, no one was making fun of people for shipping main characters in these shows. But when it comes to two men suddenly you´ll see from all corners of the internet: “why can´t it be just platonic?” “There is not enough platonic relationships” “why can´t two man just be friends?” (They can and they almost ALWAYS are) and “if you think there something romantic between them, you´re delusional” “fetishist“ “And for god´s sake just let them be friends, Loki needs a friend more then....” oh wait, but Sylvie is allowed to kiss him. Sylvie doesn´t have to be just friend. (And I must say, that I love Sylvie, I liked most of the interactions between her and Loki and I think she is a great character ((I hope we learn more about her in the future)) it just doesn´t work for me as well as Loki´s dynamic with Mobius. Maybe partly because of chemistry between actors, partly because combination of characters and they´re personality and also because I had two whole episodes to fall in love with the pair before Sylvie was even introduced.)

First of all: people can be friends and then evolve into lovers. Not only it is common romantic trope, but it is also the most realistic one. And those relationships are usually strongest. second: If people want to see Loki in a platonic friendship so desperately, why can´t it be a woman for a change? They were acting like chaotic siblings for most of the episode three anyway. The age gap aspect is also very funny. Owen is only about 12 years older (That is not that much. But I imagine, some people would get uncomfortable. But If it was man and woman, most of them wouldn´t even blinked. But two men, that has to be somehow automatically son and father figure dynamic) And If you want to dive into age of an actual characters, then good luck with that in a series about gods, variants and time travel. Almost nobody cares about age gap between Lucifer and detective Decker, or Bella and Edward. On top of that, it was heavily implied, that Loki slept with older, silver haired guy in Ragnarok, so it´s not like he would have problem with that.

Different standards are projected in a way how we see romantic dynamics between fictional characters depends on what we are used to, how are we perceiving world around us, what we are expecting to see and ALSO, what we would like to see, that much is true.  When people are used to make no differences between heterosexual and homosexual pairing, then everything what happens to the characters is measured with the same meter. (Even though I experienced queerbaiting many times (( Once upon a time, Sherlock, Supernatural, Good Omens – the last one hopefully is not the case, but I guess we´ll see)) I also saw lots of lgbt shows like Queer as folks and Sense8.) And when we are not used to see it the same way, well… then it looks basically like that one comment under Castiel´s “I love you” scene on youtube, that said  “what a beautiful friendship”.

If we forget about all that chaotic mess behind the scenes (all those articles and contrary messages)  What is happening in a show between Loki and Mobius can be objectively considered romantic and what is happening between Loki and Sylvie in a series can be objectively considered platonic (until the kiss) and vice versa.  And then to see comments about how absurd it is to even think they have chemistry, and about gay fetish - it´s hard to swallow. I read posts about absurdity of a ship and how there is absolutely nothing that would suggests romance.  Well there is, actually. But whether creators are going to work with it or not, that´s something we can only speculate. They already made Loki officially bisexual. So why should it be so absurd to assume, that there is an actual possibility of romantic subplot between Loki and Mobius? Oh right… it´s Disney and Marvel we are talking about.

So on a subject of bisexuality: Bi people can date whoever they want.  But It is a little frustrating, when there is so many heterosexual pairings in the mcu and disney but when there is a promise of lgbt character (speaking of endgame) we get one line about date from a man we´ll never see again. And when there is a promise of lgbt representation you can´t even blink during movie, or you´ll miss it (Star wars, Beauty and the beast). And then Loki said “A bit of both, I suspect the same as you”. And I won´t lie, I was happy. And I think creators made biggest step yet with this one line (which is honestly terrible, that “a bit of both” coming from Loki of all people, is the biggest step forward.) But they played it VERY safe. Obviously, both Loki, and Sylvie are bisexuals, and in three episodes, we had Loki flirting with female flight attendant, Sylvie talking about her relationship with POSTMAN and then they fall for each other. So the only thing that suggests they are really as bi as Lamentis 1 is that little sentence, that can be edited out, or easily overheard. It´s the bare minimum. And I think that frustration with how freaking slowly we´re moving into some progress is understandable. From all those great M/M dynamics I talked about, those, that could make great love story, nothing happened, because too many people “don´t mind gays but don´t need to look at them” or are scared for their children. In 2021.

It is not a fetish to wish for a gay love story in superhero movies/series. (But anyway, I don´t think there is anything bad about it. Some men like to watch lesbian porn, some woman like to read gay porn. AO3 wouldn´t be were it is today, without people reading and writing slash :D – but that has little to do with what we actually see on tv)

I´m not delusional. As much, as I love these two characters together, I know how little chance it has.  I´m not delusional. I´m just in the future, old and tired, waiting hundreds of years for at least one of my OTP to finaly become a fucking canon.

[hartrathaway]

Hii I'm interested in Hartley's story but I know literally nothing about him except that he was Wally's gay bestie in the 90s, what's his deal? Do you have any comic recs for him?

HI IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG!!!!!!!!

Okay, so really brief, his dealio is: born to ‘incredibly rich’ parents (we never get a specified ballpark, but Hartley states that he was ‘born with two silver spoons in [his] mouth’ if that helps context wise), Hartley’s deaf!  His parents had him get cochlear implants when he was a child, which ‘medically healed him’.  (His deafness has been treated extremely ablest by writers who actually remember he’s deaf, I need to warn you of this now.)  He’s a music and sound waves guy, a former villain (it’s an on again off again relationship, but a lot of his character is defined by his time as a hero) and he’s very leftist.  Gay best friend in the AIDS crisis turned Wally West from a midwestern conservative to a leftie as well.  (Wally’s wife, Linda Park, was a major contributing factor, but we’re focusing on Hartley for this, so I’m gonna talk about him.)

I’ve got a mix of good reading from all over, so I’m gonna break this into sections, and do my best to describe which is which.  (all my screencaps are from this website right here, because i do not own all the back issues and it would have taken much, much longer to do this post, and as such, some of them are not sized or formatted correctly)  Click the read more if you’re interested!  Please note: I am not a 100% authority figure on Hartley, and I know there’s a few stories I have left out (the story with Bart Allen’s first appearance is a good one that Hartley is in), but these are the gist of who is he, what he’s been up to, and what is the family drama.

So for New Earth (otherwise known as post-Crisis on Infinite Earths), is where Hartley actually becomes Wally’s friend, and is a hero!  I’m going to focus on this section first.  Unfortunately, due to being a minor character, a lot of stuff is broken into small stories, or things that are happening behind the scenes, so there’s no real issue x - y that’s gonna help much.

The Flash Vol 2 #31, #32 Quick summary: In issue 31, supervillain here is killing homeless people, Hartley has been helping these same people get up on their feet by helping them get squatter’s rights.  They skip the fighting because a kid asks if they’re going to fight for a half hour and then team up, and go right to the team up.  They get Linda Park in, supervillain ends up backfiring his powers.  In issue 32, Wally, Hartley, and their pal Mason officially move to Keystone city.  Hartley’s folks are in trouble while the three of them are trying to freeload (off of Hartley’s parents, his and his parents’ relationship is better now than it had been, for a multitude of reasons), Wally and Hartley rescue Hartley’s parents, we also meet Jerrie, Hartley’s sister, and all is resolved there.  Yay, the family loves each other again!

(issue 31)

(issue 32)

The Flash Vol 2 #53 Special mention this is the issue where Hartley comes out and also has to inform Wally that Wally cannot tell who is a homosexual.  Also Wally’s an IRS agent here, for shame Wallace.  At least Hartley gets to cosplay Wally at the end, so that’s fun.  Content warning for this issue specifically is some casual homophobia, just so you know that going in.

(issue 53)

The Flash Vol 2 #170 In 170, Hartley’s being contacted by his father to call in ‘a favor’ that Hartley owes him.  The main plot line includes (one of) Wally’s ex(es) showing up, a former hero and teammate, Frances Kane, otherwise known as Magneta.  A person has been found murdered at Keystone Motors, and supervillain Goldface begins rallying union workers (which seems to just be a poorly timed coincidence).  The story itself (170 - 173) in and of itself is really fun, but I’m only going to talk about Hartley, or else I’ll be here all day.

(issue 170)

The Flash Vol 2 #174, #175, #178, #179 And here we get some drama! I’m grouping all of these together, since it’s all the same chunk of the story for Hartley, but since it’s the Flash, Wally’s center stage.  In 174, the people who were living with the Rathaway family aren’t exactly big fans of Hartley.  They know he’s changed his ways, he’s a hero now, but it’s just…  something feels off.  There’s loud music sounds, and bam!  Suddenly Hartley’s there and oh boy is this gonna be a hot mess.  In issue 175, we see some footage, and Hartley’s the lead suspect in his parents’ murder, considering that the footage has Hartley onscreen.  178 rolls up, and after Wally’s getting Gorilla Grodd taken care of (and that fight is a doozy), Wally gets to find out Hartley’s been arrested for the murder of his own parents, and Hartley confesses on-screen to his parents’ murder  (Also Hartley’s got a beard now, that’s how you know he’s depressed.) 179 opens with Hartley being processed.  Linda and Wally go to see him, and although Hartley confessed, he said “I think I did.”  (emphasis is mine; in the panel Hartley says “I think I did.”) Joker?  He’s got some Joker-fied people, and poor Hartley gets it too :(  Hartley straight up nearly kills Captain Boomerang (it’s okay, Wally stops him), and surprise!  Welcome back to Iron Heights Hartley.  Gonna have a fun time :)

(issue 174; this is the least messy part of the panel, but it was intended to be that way)

(issue 175)

(issue 178)

(issue 179)

The Flash: Iron Heights Brief interlude from the main comic line, we’ve got a one-shot that’s taking place in Iron Heights.  This takes place before Hartley gets arrested, presumably (since, y’know, they’re breaking in and all).  Fun one-shot honestly, keeps me on my toes the whole time.  Hartley’s a main character, and it’s less personal drama and very story driven.  You don’t need this to enjoy Hartley regardless, but I enjoy it!

(The Flash: Iron Heights, which you can read here.)

The Flash Volume 2 #189, #190 189! Now we find out how Hartley’s parents were actually murdered!  No spoilers, but we do get a prison breakout.  This is where we get some origin story! Don’t read this first though, because you’re going to be spoiling yourself the plot of his arrest.  In 190 we get more origin, including the way DC treated his deafness. (It’s ablest, and I’m still mentally grappling how you wouldn’t notice your child being deaf for two years, but okay Rachel and Osgood, you keep being bad.)  The story goes on for now, with Hartley on the run from… well, everyone.

(issue 189)

(issue 190)

This is pretty much it for New Earth Hartley up until Countdown.

I don’t like Countdown at all.  I’m much happier pretending that Countdown doesn’t exist (both because of how it treats Hartley for a multitude of reasons, and how Thad Thawne is treated leading up to Countdown).  More happens with Hartley’s storyline in Countdown, but I hate it with such a passion that I wouldn’t recommend it at all.  Countdown leads into Final Crisis, and I’m not a fan of either.  However, should you wish to read and make your own opinions, here’s Countdown and here’s Final Crisis.  Please note, Countdown’s issues are done in reverse order (so from issue 51 to 1, rather than 1 to 51)

And now I’m going to tell you the gospel truth:

I do like New 52 Hartley!  A lot. Unfortunately, he’s not as much in the n52 Flash run as I would like (but I’m biased, as obvious by my url).  What you need to know is that Hartley’s a musician now, like orchestra director, and he’s in a relationship with Barry’s boss, David Singh. (power move, honestly)  Unfortunately, we don’t get a whole lot in the main line.  Also at this point, the Wally West of New Earth hasn’t transitioned to the n52.  Wallace West of n52 is an entirely different character, and that’s a whole other issue for another discussion.  Wally West as we know him from New Earth doesn’t come back for a while.  Wally and Hartley haven’t talked since before Flashpoint, and that’s a shame. 

So read the Crimes of Passion Anthology he’s got please I’m begging you.  The only downside is that the artist gave him a haircut.

(Crimes of Passion: Secret Admirer)

I haven’t read anything DCeased related, and while I know Hartley gets his time to shine and kiss David, I can’t tell you much beyond that.  I’m pretty sure there’s other people who can tell you more, but it’s not me I’m afraid.  (This is me saying guys, please tell me about Hartley in DCeased, someone tell me about my fictional lavender marriage husband.)

[avelera]

Part 2 of Let’s All Drag Joss Whedon (Finally) - Joss Whedon Doesn’t Accept the Premise (And that’s why he struggles with modern superhero franchises)

Part 1 - “Break the Cutie” aka Whedon’s just writing his fetish over and over and people are just beginning to figure that out

So apparently, Joss Whedon’s take on “The Justice League” was so horrible even WB’s own execs despised it, and we get some hints as to what they hated from the Vanity Fair article, “The robber on the rooftop—so goofy and awful. The Russian family—so useless and pointless. Everyone knew it. It was so awkward because nobody wanted to admit what a piece of shit it was.”

Now, I have a theory as to what went wrong here, and it’s the same thing that went wrong (for me) with Steve Rogers’ plot line in Age of Ultron, and looking back, in Avengers 1. It goes beyond Whedon just not wanting to continue any other creator’s stories (a gripe for another day) into the fact that AoU and even Avengers 1 feel a bit like, well, the movies that people in the Marvel Universe make about the Avengers. Not events that happened to the actual Avengers as seen in their own films. 

It’s because when it’s not his own world, Joss Whedon just doesn’t accept the premise of other people’s fantastical worlds. 

What do I mean by “accept the premise”? Another phrase could be “suspend disbelief” or “take it seriously” but what it translates to is being willing to accept even a ludicrous scenario as fact and go from there as a writer, arguably the foundations of writing speculative fiction. I can write for you a heart-wrenching story about a clown who is supernaturally stuck in his clown-car if I just accept the premise enough, because once the silliness of the premise is accepted, we can acknowledge it and move on to the seriousness of the character’s suffering and continue from there. Any ludicrous premise can be played straight if you accept the premise. 

Young nerds may not remember, but for all the scattered success of late 90′s/early 00′s sci-fi/fantasy/superhero films there were ten times as many ridiculous failures that all felt like they were self-conscious to even be alive much less daring to subject you to a story about wizards or superheroes for goodness sake. It felt as if the creators themselves were embarrassed to be there. This all changed when films like Lord of the Rings, The Dark Knight, and Iron Man 1 stopped cringing away from the fantasy elements and accepted the premise that fantastical things are happening, that there are heroes in rocket suits and bat costumes saving the world and ok, now that we’ve acknowledged this is a departure from normal reality, we can actually deal seriously with the things happening in these world. 

Superhero franchises like Marvel haven’t looked back from this decision! Yes our heroes are in costumes, but Captain America isn’t just a boy scout in spandex, he’s a man who suffered and lost more than most people can comprehend in the course of being frozen in ice for 75 years, and in films like “Winter Soldier” we’re going to deal with that immense suffering, the scars it leaves, and what happens when he discovers his best friend has suffered a fate worse than even he has. 

Whedon didn’t want to accept Winter Soldier in AoU. Actually, he didn’t want to accept any of the individual character films in his story, he just picks up right off from Avengers 1 with a few scant nods to the intervening canon. In fact, he outright said he wanted the MCU to be loosely connected one-offs where creators like him could all do their own thing without paying attention to each other.

To me it seems obvious that this was in part because Whedon couldn’t accept Winter Soldier (and, IMO, was jealous of it). He couldn’t accept Cap/Steve Rogers being more than a punchline. He’s always making him into this golden retriever, boy scout, whatever. Tony Stark, for all that he gets better treatment as the “cool”, quippy guy of a Joss Whedon story, also has most of his trauma and PTSD dealt with in his own individual films tossed out the window in favor of him, yeah I’m gonna say it, basically bullying everyone with how smart he is the whole film and generally being obnoxious and unbearable. 

The only place serious emotion is allowed to live in a Whedon story set in someone else’s world is when he gets to play out his “Nerd Guy and Battered Strong Female Character” love story, which for Avengers he twisted Nat and Bruce Banner into performing for his fetishistic pleasure. A story that made no objective sense for the characters, that at least Scarlett Johansson protested as not making sense for her character (and she was right) and which required absolutely tortured logic for some of the other characters, like Hawkeye suddenly having a family that was never alluded to previously in order to derail the burgeoning (and actor promoted!) love-story between Hawkeye and Black Widow. 

Not that I’m bitter or anything. 

My point is, I’m not surprised that given modern superhero films are built on accepting the premise of a superhero world where people where spandex but also feel really bad emotions that we’ve gotta take seriously for the story to work, that Whedon’s 90′s comic book era quippy detachment from all this “silly comic stuff” just doesn’t work. It’s great for the occasional humorous scene but it can’t carry a franchise and it clashes with other creators who are taking the characters, premise, and world seriously. 

So while everyone is waking up, shocked, to this realization that Titan of Nerd Culture Joss Whedon can’t carry a modern superhero franchise that takes itself seriously, I admit, I’m kind of sitting here going, “You just figured that out??”

[jcmorrigan]

Pick your top 10 favorite Megavolt episodes (villain team ups included). Also, I think Megavolt would totally listen to Daft Punk.

Yes, he ABSOLUTELY would. I have headcanoned before that "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" is one of his favorite songs.

Anyway, here's my order with a brief explanation

10. Jail Bird - I just like the scenes of the Fearsome Four here (read: the four who aren't Negaduck) because it really proves they're honest-to-goodness friends despite all being unrepentant (well, barely repentant) supervillains. And it breaks my heart because the reason Negaduck is able to betray them so thoroughly is because they assume he sees them the same way.

9. Inherit the Wimp - Stealing people's energy was really a cool gimmick and allowed him to cause some of the most damage he ever has (intentionally, anyway). Also the slapstick is choice.

8. Duck Blind - THE APPEARANCE OF THE LIGHT SABER KATANA! Also, for his intro episode, it just pours all the fun energy into him that sets up his character for later. It's just a really good way to bring him into the story.

7. Dead Duck - I know it's a dream sequence in the end, but I love the idea of Megavolt managing to kill Darkwing and then becoming a celebrity over it instead of facing consequences, and THEN being defeated because Launchpad gives him a monologue that makes him feel guilty and that's literally all it takes. He's such a dork. Also the "Well, this just proves I'm not ANY idiot" scene.

6. Just Us Justice Ducks - The Fearsome Five was absolute MAGIC here. What I wouldn't give to go back to the 90s and experience it the way you were supposed to - by seeing each of them in separate eps, and then all of a sudden WHOA! THEY'RE ALL WORKING TOGETHER! ALL OF THEM! AND THE GUY FROM THE TRON SPLITTER EPISODE IS BACK AND A BIGGER VILLAIN! Also the same goes for the heroes - I love how the show deliberately played with Darkwing's self-made quasi-edgy loner personality to give him the arc of realizing that a hero team-up is what he NEEDS in order to save the day, and what you end up with is SQUAD GOALS.

5. Twitching Channels - This entire episode is why I believe Megavolt now absolutely knows that the world he lives in is 100% fictional. He is aware he's a cartoon character. The show basically says as much. I have never seen a fourth-wall break THAT BIG before and I appreciate the guts it took to write that plot.

4. Clash Reunion - LOVED learning that DW and Megs' rivalry goes back further than either of them realized, LOVED learning that Darkwing as an entity exists because of Megavolt (yes I know technically future!Drake inspired kid!Drake to become a superhero via time travel first but SHHHHH he didn't think to actually do it until Megavolt showed up). The humor is on point in all of these, but especially in this one - I love the sequence where Megavolt forgets he's a supervillain and everyone could've escaped if Launchpad hadn't reminded him. Also when he actually gets HAPPY that Darkwing didn't actually give up and instead is continuing their rivalry. I love the way their rivalry is written so much.

3. A Revolution in Home Appliances - I LOVE WHUMP. THAT SHOULD TELL YOU ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT WHY I LIKE THIS ONE SO MUCH.

2. Stressed to Kill - His partnership with Quackerjack is THE DREAM TEAM and this whole episode is those two just going around town causing chaos and being idiots. This is the most damage Megavolt has ever caused to St. Canard and it was BY ACCIDENT

1. The Frequency Fiends - Look, while I in no way call for the redemption of Megavolt (he's too fun as a villain), this is a WONDERFUL Enemy Mine episode. It was super fun to see him decide that yeah, Darkwing and Launchpad can be his friends today because they all hate the same monsters. It's adorable and it warms my little heart.

[canmom]

Martes de Cine 27 - So, Jodo then.

Hello Tokufriends! I am safely returned from Northern Ireland, and here to serve you some films in the next few days before I depart once again for the USA.

Tonight we’re gonna tackle a film I’ve been recommended for a good while by extremely delightful women: Alejandro Jodorowsky’s surreal occult epic The Holy Mountain. Which is perhaps a little timely, with a Dune in the air, and the recent announcement that Taika Waititi is adapting Moebius & Jodo’s The Incal.

So, Jodo then.

I talked a little about this guy on the Moebius animation night, and that probably serves as a good introduction.

Alejandro Jodorowsky is a… challenging movie director and science fiction-occultism-etc. kind of guy. So what’s the deal? Let’s put it this way… the guy’s really fucking obsessed with talking rape and portraying most parodically extreme masculinity; he’s one of those occulty guys and there’s some… fascinatingly weird shit in his comics like The Metabarons. But he’s also friends with just about all the big names in the industry at that time, which means he’s worked with some really incredible artists, and along the way directed some really renowned films like The Holy Mountain (1973); but equally he is infamous for claiming to have raped the lead actress for a scene in his film El Topo (1970), though he later claimed this was just an edgy lie he made up to get attention as a foreign director.

I went on to talk about his (in)famous attempt to adapt Dune as a ten hour epic, a subject we will get to in a little while. Now, to be fair on the guy, I think he’s a big edgelord and the rape fixation thing is like... only part of that. But I figure let’s put that up front so we know exactly what we’re getting into!

Born in Chile, Jodo first hit the film scene at the Acapulco Film Festival in Mexico in 1968 with Fando Y Lis, where - in the long tradition of surrealist filmmakers such as Luis Buñuel (see Animation Night 17) - he got chased out of the theatre at the premiere by a crowd throwing stones:

When Jodorowsky's first feature film, Fando y Lis, premiered at the 1968 Acapulco Film Festival, the screening was controversial and erupted into a riot, due to its graphic content.[90] Jodorowsky had to leave the theatre by sneaking outside to a waiting limousine, and when the crowd outside the theatre recognized him, the car was pelted with rocks.[91] The following week, the film opened to sell-out crowds in Mexico City, but more fights broke out, and the film was banned by the Mexican government.[92] Jodorowsky himself was nearly deported and the controversy provided a great deal of fodder for the Mexican newspapers.[93]

Undeterred, he soon started on his next project, El Topo (1970), in which a gunslinger played by Jodorowsky himself wanders around doing acts of violence in search of enlightenment.

Described as an attempt to realise the effect of psychedelic drugs in film, El Topo was shot in a Mexican desert but first released in New York, a 'midnight movie’ at the Elgin Theatre, putting it in the company of films like Rocky Horror and Eraserhead. When denying his infamous rape claim decades later, Jodo described how he promoted it:

I had to break through using the only tool I had: shock through scandalous statements. This is how I did it: I dressed up as the mystical bandit character [the titular El Topo], I introduced myself in the interviews with a beard, a mane and a black leather suit, and I said things that purposefully shocked the interviewers. "I am an anti-feminist, I hate women. I hate cats. I've eaten human meat tacos with Diego Rivera. El Topo is a film where things really happened: that scene of rape is a real rape! I killed the animals (that in reality I had purchased dead from a local zoo) with a fork I sharpened myself!"

The claimed ‘real rape’ in question was of actress Mara Lorenzio, who to my knowledge has not commented (and given that Jodo is now a very established and esteemed director I certainly would understand why she’d be reluctant to dig that up) - her only other film credit on IMDb is a documentary on these ‘midnight movies’ and I cannot find a copy of. It seems the circumstances are probably not exactly how Jodo described them at the time, but that certainly doesn’t rule out all sorts of abuse of power taking place on set. I have sufficient doubt that I’m not in a hurry to screen El Topo.

In any case, Jodo’s edgy performance evidently fascinated the Americans, who dubbed it the first of a genre known as the ‘acid western’. In particular, it impressed extremely rich musician couple John Lennon and Yoko Ono, who were so impressed that they decided to give Jodo a large amount of money to make his next film, which dropped in 1973.

So that brings us to The Holy Mountain!

No doubt about it, Lennon and Ono got a pretty unique movie for their money. The way it’s been described to me, the film is a series of loosely connected vignettes which function as a sort of well-informed satire on occultism, cults and the like. The story concerns a young begger called the Thief, who ends up joining a small cult of eight people (each one associated with planetary and tarot symbolism) from various walks of life such as an arms manufacturer and a toymaker who indoctrinates children to war, who all now answer answer to a man named the Alchemist (once again played by Jodo himself). Their project project is a quest to reach the ‘Holy Mountain’, where supposedly they will learn the secret of immortality.

The film apparently draws primarily on two books, a 16th-century spiritual treatise called Ascent of Mount Carmel by John of the Cross and the 20th-century unfinished novel Mount Analogue by René Daumal. So it’s a film for wizards? Perhaps; or perhaps as it has been described to me a film by a wizard that sharply and amusingly criticises the aspirations of occultists and the whole idea that a guy can lead you to enlightenment by enacting various abuses. Whatever it’s about, it will no doubt - like a lot of things made by occultist artists, who certainly tend to have their finger dead on the symbolic pulse - be packed with striking, inventive images, compelling jokes and elaborate visual compositions. So I’m quite looking forward to seeing it.

Anyway, I was stuck for a while for a film 2 to go with this. The rest of Jodo’s filmography doesn’t generally entertain such a lasting impact or renown. The answer I decided would be the French documentary Jodorowsky’s Dune.

To briefly summarise what happened next: as we discussed on that Moebius post, in the wake of The Holy Mountain, Jodo was asked to direct an adaptation of Dune by a French consortium who purchased the rights. What followed became something of a film legend: Jodo invited artists like Moebius, Giger and Chris Foss to America, and started preproduction - including vast amounts of concept art - for an absurdly maximalist movie that would span about fourteen hours. He had various... interesting ideas about who to cast:

Jodorowsky planned to cast the Surrealist artist Salvador Dalí, in what would have been his only speaking role as a film actor, in the role of Emperor Shaddam IV. Dalí agreed when Jodorowsky offered to pay him a fee of $100,000 per hour.[27] He also planned to cast Orson Welles as Baron Vladimir Harkonnen; Welles only agreed when Jodorowsky offered to get his favourite gourmet chef to prepare his meals for him throughout the filming.[28] The book's protagonist, Paul Atreides, was to be played by Jodorowsky's son, Brontis Jodorowsky. The music would be composed by Pink Floyd and Magma.[27]

Naturally nobody would fund something so outré, and the project collapsed, which I half suspect was his intent from the beginning - it did a lot after all to help build up his personal mythology. Jodo walked away just fine, directing several more films and becoming a successful author of French comics working with artists like Moebius and Enki Bilal on further spiritual science fiction epics; the artists weren’t all so lucky, at least in the short term.

Why return to it now? Well, if Jodorowsky’s Dune (2013) is to be believed, this project laid the groundwork for a lot of the imagery of science fiction to come in the next few decades, most notably Star Wars and Alien, whose bold designs then became cemented (and gradually diluted) in the impending era of media franchises; and there is a much less ambitious interpretation of Dune in the theatres right now. In any case, the production - this mad pursuit of an obviously impossible vision - is a pretty fun little legend in its own right, and the documentary seems to be a very well-regarded account of it.

So, what of Jodo then? He seems to be one of the people who realised that if you go all out playing a character - in this case, the “crazy visionary foreign director/wizard” - you can secure a certain niche in the whole celebrity apparatus. I’m sure his occultist beliefs are sincere - not my bailiwick but I’m advised he knows what he’s about there - but I’m also sure he plays it up a lot. And yeah, he might very well have raped someone and even if he didn’t, he sure wanted people to think he did. But, for all that he’s an enemy, his whole deal functions as a kind of unusually direct and unrestrained window into the fucked up psychosexual imaginary that is running our society so, much like his friends in the French comics milieu, it still ends up “fascinating”. (At some point I must finish reading and write up a post on The Metabarons).

Alongside those two, I intend to show the latest episode of Kamen Rider Revice, picking up from last week’s cliffhanger. Very diluted Toku in our Tuesdays these days, but at least there is some ;p

Toku Tuesday will be going live now at twitch.tv/canmom and films will be rolling in like 20 minutes or so probably!

[hatterstan-shameblog]

Here is the first one

Second :D

And last..he's looking at you 👀💦

ALRIGHT you know WHAT—

There’s…a lot going on here. So much so, that I have decided to create

CONTEXT

for these three images that is

COMPLETELY FAKE

because I think it’ll be a fun writing exercise. kind of a cringe move on my part, but consider: i have fun making up ridiculous lies about characters who don’t exist in real life.

(which is how I’m treating these, by the way. yes, they are pictures of kaneko nobuaki, but for my purposes, they are NOT actually him. they are distinct fictional characters who are not real.)

so if you’re feeling adventurous skip below the cut and watch me break it down:

Image 1: Accidental “Date” Makes Cousin’s Wedding Less Terrible Than Originally Expected

The year is 1999. Your cousin (who you are not particularly close to) is getting married…on a cruise ship. Your mother insists you attend. You insist upon spending 90% of your time sipping margaritas on the deck and flipping through the latest issue of Marie Claire while trying desperately not to think about the fact that you are surrounded by nothing but open ocean.

One of the (very drunk) bridesmaids tries to toss you a beach ball because you have been, and I quote: like, a total bummer this whole time. She misses. It hits the person next to you in the face. Great. Awesome. You think: well now who’s being, like, a total bummer?

Luckily the person who got hit in the face laughs the entire thing off. He says your friends seem…’lively.’ You say that’s pretty rich coming from a guy who looks like a rejected member of ‘The Clash.’ He insists that he left them, not the other way around.

You slip into conversation. You tell him that you’re here for a wedding. He offers his condolences. You accept them. He says he actually likes weddings—something about two people making a life-changing commitment speaks to him on a soul-level. That and the open bar, of course.

You suggest he crash the wedding. He says he’s not sure if he can make it—there’s a shuffleboard tournament that evening that he would just hate to miss, plus the latest issue of Soap Opera Digest is waiting on his bedside table just begging to be opened. You say that’s perfectly understandable, but, if he suddenly finds himself caught up on the latest All My Children gossip, he can meet you back here at four.

Surprise, surprise: he shows up. He’s wearing the same shirt he was before, but buttoned up this time—and with one of the most hideous neckties you’ve ever seen, which he apparently borrowed from the kind old man next door. Instead of complimenting his attire (because it is truly un-compliment-able), you take the opportunity to mention that this is a Titanic-themed wedding. He says that having a Titanic-themed wedding on a cruise ship is “kind of fucked up” and you solemnly agree.

Everyone is very surprised and pleased to see that you’ve brought a date—even the bride, who tells you that you’re “just like Jack and Rose.” You agree, much to her delight…until you say that, if the ship goes down, you also won’t share the door and let him freeze to death in the icy water. He insists he’d be the guy who jumps off the ship and hits his leg on the propellor—that’s his favorite part of the whole movie, and it’d be an honor to re-enact the scene.

The wedding is…a wedding. Vows, toasts, pictures—and you’re sipping champagne through the entire thing. The two of you spend the evening getting completely wasted and telling everyone a different story about just who your ‘mystery date’ is. Highlights include: the captain’s unruly son whose been tasked with following in his father’s sea-faring footsteps; professional cave-diver who discovered a new species of slug and is spending his reward money on a nice vacation; head of marketing who gives all those clever names to the nail polishes at OPI; the guy who folds everyone’s towels into animal shapes.

You end up where you started: on neighboring lounge chairs, with a margarita, and talking to this stranger who has recently crossed into “acquaintance” territory. You chat about how “My Heart Will Go On” is actually a good song, and he promises not to tell anyone that you said that. He also says that this is the best Titanic-themed cruise ship wedding he’s ever been to, and he can’t wait until somebody decides to do Jaws.

Eventually, you both stagger back to your rooms with promises of seeing each other at breakfast. Unfortunately, you have the worst hangover of your life the next morning and even the thought of ‘breakfast’ makes you want to roll over and die, so you don’t manage to stumble out of bed until it’s time to disembark.

You see him at port, and you each offer each other a little wave before going your separate ways. Six weeks later, you get a Polaroid of the two of you together, sitting at the bar and laughing at something that must have been very, very hilarious.

You don’t remember most of what happened that night, but you remember it was not as terrible as it could have been.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Image 2: Extremely Weird Guy On The Street Has You Questioning Your Sanity

It’s 6:00 in the morning—a truly terrible time to be awake, but a necessary evil. Your flight leaves at 10, and since it’s an international thing, you want to make sure you get there in plenty of time to get to your gate (and maybe sample all the fancy perfumes you can’t afford at one of those high-end stores that are always in airports.)

The streets are mostly empty, save for a few random pedestrians and a handful of passed-out salarymen snoozing on the curb. The sky a rainy gray-blue as the sun tries to rise behind the springtime cloud cover—it’s no doubt going to be another dismal day, as is common during this time of year. Hopefully there’s not too much turbulence on your flight…

You stop at a crosswalk, waiting for the little walking man signal to show up on the light across the way. You’re soon joined by another person—a man in a soft-looking jacket who supplies you with a small “good morning” bob of his head. You respond in kind, throwing in a small smile for good measure. It’s nice that he too understands that it’s entirely too early to be having any kind of conversation, even if it is just a simple verbal greeting between strangers on a street corner.

The light changes, and you both begin your trek across the street. Your fellow walker is faster than you—or, more likely, has longer legs and, ergo, a longer stride than your own—and is nearly halfway across by the time you get your wheeled suitcase over the curb. He seems decent enough. You hope he’s going somewhere nice.

It’s then that you make the mistake of looking up. It would have been much better if you had just continued watching the white painted lines on the road and thinking about how it reminds you of piano keys—and how you hated the six months of piano lessons your parents forced you to take in the first grade.

But no. You noticed someone walking towards you, and you just had to look up.

The first thing you notice is a rainbow tie-dye shirt. The second thing you notice is that the rainbow tie-dye shirt is on a very cheerful looking gentleman, who seemed to be bobbing his head in time with a song only he could hear.

The third thing you notice—and this one’s the real kicker—is the large blue-and-green reptile sitting on his shoulder. It’s bulging eyes are hooded in pleasure as it’s red-pink tongue darts out to eat the green something—maybe a grape or a small piece of melon?—from the rainbow tie-dye man’s hand. It is nothing short of a spectacle, honestly, and you feel a piece of your sanity evaporate.

The rainbow tie-dye man continues on, uncaring of your confused stare at his strange pet. You even turn around to make sure that you weren’t somehow hallucinating, and sure enough, there is definitely some kind of creature draped over this stranger’s shoulder. It’s tail even sways in time with the man’s steps, which is both cute and confusing.

Because it would not do to stand in the middle of the street all day, considering the existence of rainbow tie-dye man and his exotic pet, you do the only thing you can do: turn back around and continue on your journey. You need a coffee. Maybe with an extra shot of espresso, after witnessing whatever the hell that was. Something to set you right again.

“Was that…?”

The other man—the soft-coat long-stride one—is speaking low enough as to not draw attention, but loud enough for you to hear as you make your way towards the sidewalk. His expression reads ‘concerned, but trying not to show it’ which you suppose is the polite and mature way of handling the situation.

“…an iguana? Yeah,” you answer him, “I saw it too.”

The man’s brow furrows. His mouth puckers into a small frown as he considers…well, something.

“…Okay, then,” he concludes, shrugging his shoulders, “Hell of a way to start the day.”

“Yeah.”

And you both continue on your way. He turns left at the next intersection, you turn right—but even though your paths may now be different, you will forever share an unbreakable bond over the fantastical sight you’ve witnessed today.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Image 3: Near Death Experience At Open Mic Night

You are not a poet.

Well, not professionally, anyways. You’ve been known to dabble in the written word, often scribbling little snippets of rhyme in a notebook over your lunch break or tapping a verse or two into the notes app on your phone. It a kind of outlet, you suppose—a way to keep the creative energy that bubbles inside of you from boiling over.

It’s also worth mentioning that you are not a confident public speaker. Not since that unfortunate incident in the third grade where you forgot the single line you had in the school play and ran off stage, tears streaming down your face and—actually, no, you’re not going to think about that right now. Or ever again, hopefully.

So when your (tipsy) coworkers decide that it’s a good idea to push you onto the stage at the local dive bar’s open mic night—while shouting at you to “read the one about the night-blooming jasmine”—you freeze up. There are at least seven strangers staring at you, expectation rising with every passing second of your inaction. It’s nerve-wracking in the way that the third-grade incident was not, and you gulp against the nervousness that rises in your throat.

Shaking hands scroll frantically through your phone, looking for the requested poem—and after a few agonizing moments, you manage to find it. Your voice cracks rather embarrassingly as you begin to read, trying your damndest to get the words out right so you can slink back to the bar and drown the rest of the night in Chardonnay.

Everything is going well—or, at least, as well as can be expected—until you notice that the room is suddenly feeling very hot. That’s the last coherent thought you have before the room goes dark and everything falls silent.

Next thing you know, you’re staring at the ceiling. A man who you do not know is leaning over you, and his mouth is moving—oh, he’s probably trying to say something to you, but it’s very difficult to tell what he’s saying over the throbbing pain in the back of your head.

You ask him if you’re dead. It’s a possibility after all, that you’ve somehow died and landed yourself in some kind of special public-speaking hell. That’s what this feels like, anyways.

The man says no, you are not dead. You say ‘dammit’ in response. He tries to hold back laughter, offering to help you up by extending his hand. You take it and—ouch, ugh, ew, going from laying to standing is not a fun experience.

You thank him (albeit awkwardly) for helping you up, and he insists that ‘it’s cool.’ Passing out in front of an audience is not even remotely cool, but you nod and thank him again, anyways.

Before you’re able to converse with the helpful stranger any further, your coworkers have come to collect you. You are whisked away by someone from accounting, who offers to escort you home—an offer you gladly accept, very excited to leave the site of your failure behind you.

Safe to say, you never go back to that particular bar again.

[smp-live]

Was scrolling through c!Wilbur crit blogs again and it got me thinking about why exactly I argue in favour of him so much so here’s a random ramble (that got long) about it:

Most c!Wilbur critics (at least, in the tag, not directly post-lore stream. The ones that do actual analysis on him) are like... really reasonable about it, actually, lmao. Like it’s mostly just calling him a bad person because of power hunger/manipulation/being a bad dad/whatever else. (Not talking about antis. I mean people who are really critical of him, but recognize that he’s a well-crafted character with nuance.)

Which I agree with! I consider myself an apologist, my writing and analysis leans really sympathetic, and I still agree that he’s a shitty rat bastard that I would run far away from irl. Even at the beginning of the story, he’s very morally grey, sometimes using underhanded persuasion tactics, doing ehh things like stealing, and it only gets worse from there.

But on the other hand, he’s... not that bad. Like I saw one person say about c!Dream, “My reaction to most critique of him is... so what?” and that’s how I feel about c!Wilbur, I suppose. Yeah, he tried to rig an election - but it was a last-ditch effort at not going full dictator, he didn’t follow through, and later on he - in part - decided to blow it up because they couldn’t get it back while being democratic. And yeah, he manipulated people - all in all, it wasn’t really really bad things, mostly to paint himself in a better light because of his insecurities, and people sometimes fall into manipulative language without even outwardly realizing that it’s a shitty thing to do. Of course, that shows a bigger underlying problem in their mindset and the way they interpret relationships and possession, but then that’s a different discussion - and definitely one that applies to c!Wilbur.

(Not saying he doesn’t ever intentionally manipulate people. I think that a. sometimes it might be accidental, (”If you wanna be President you’re gonna have to get on my good side,” mans was Not thinking straight,) and b. other times he falls into old habits/coping mechanisms that happen to be manipulation, (Tommy at Las Nevadas.) Other than the election and maybe some times in the early founding of L’Manberg, I can’t think of any moments where I’m like, “Yeah, he is Purposefully Manipulating here.” And even then, it just doesn’t strike me as a terrible thing. People manipulate, it’s a thing they do. That’s it. A morally grey action.)

And I think the majority of the reason I make more posts painting him in a positive light and don’t really discuss my critique of him is because it feels like the fandom has an overwhelming bias of hatred/crit, even if a lot of that isn’t, y’know, proper analysis of his character. I instinctively want to balance it out for this character I love/relate to, because a lot of what I see straight-up ignores the lighter side of his moral-greyness.

Like, a while back, I posted a couple clips from late-election arc, of Wilbur talking about how he feels about Fundy siding with Quackity and against him. And the way I initially saw it while watching was, “Okay. He feels betrayed by his son who disagrees with his politics - and thus, him as a person, because your politics are a reflection of your identity, especially in Wilbur’s mind - and it’s perfectly understandable that he’d want to vent about that in private to a close friend. On the other hand, he should be able to recognize that Fundy’s allowed to be his own person and shouldn’t be babied. Fundy is in the right, here, but Wilbur’s feelings shouldn’t be dismissed.”

But then 90% of the tags were just straight-up hate for c!Wilbur, going as far as to say that he should die again. (And this was after we found out how bad the afterlife was for him.) That fucking floored me. I just couldn’t understand how they took this nuanced character aching for ‘the son he knew’ back (hm. very similar to c!Phil, actually) and turned it into ‘wow. This suicidal man sucks and should maybe die.’ I was so close to making a post defending him before realizing - I was letting fandom bias against a character push me further onto the sympathetic side.

And that’s such a fuckin’ weird thing to have happen, because you’d think that exposure to negativity about a character would make you feel more negative about them? But without fail, every time I scroll through the crit tag, or read a critical post about c!Wilbur/L’Manberg, I maybe lean a bit more towards that side for a few hours before swinging back hard onto the apologist side. Because a lot of the critique, to me, is really just, “so what?” after I let it stew a bit.

Then there’s the whole mental health issue. Obviously it doesn’t excuse the shit he did - I know people who have been in the middle of breakdowns and the stuff they say still fucking hurts, even if they didn’t truly mean it. But recognizing that he needs help? That for pretty much all his time on-screen, he was depressed and paranoid, which obviously affects the way he acts? That’s obvious. And were he in the position to get professional help - which he deserves - everything would be much better off. That’s the root of my apologism, I think: He deserves to get better. He’s not inherently evil, or bad, just a fucked up little man who’s ruined his own life and needs help. I want to see him, specifically him, get better.

Narratively, his punishment has been extreme and disproportionate. Every mistake, every choice - good or bad - has led to suffering, on his part. Start a fun little rebellion, maybe to gain some power? War and betrayal. Declare an election to consolidate said power? Lose, and get exiled. Blow up a nation? Die, and even in the afterlife, he can't catch a break. Purely as a sympathetic human, it feels like he deserves to rest. Deserves to heal.

But even medicated and less anxious, or going to therapy for his neuroticism and depression, or whatever, he still would be quite morally grey. A lot of his manipulation, his power hunger, comes from this neuroticism; from needing to feel safe and needed, (just like Quackity.) Not all of it, though. He’d still have his unhealthy ideals about relationships and possession, for example. Less prominent, sure, but still there. Some people, I feel, discount how tied up with his mental illness it is, while others don’t really recognize that it’s also a personality problem. Like, changing those beliefs is changing part of who he fundamentally is, as a person.

Actually, I think the c!Wilbur apologist community, in general, tends to scapegoat his mental illness a little too much? Not in that we explain his actions with it or ask people not to villainize it, (although sometimes I feel that what we call villainizing mental illness is a bit excessive, but it’s not my place to talk about that as someone who doesn’t really relate to Pogtopia!Wilbur,) but in that we use it in discussions a lot. Which is fair, because it permeates every single aspect of his character, but even without it he’d have toxic traits? Like his possessiveness is not purely a byproduct of his mental illness, imo. Nor is his treatment of Fundy. It’s amplified by it, surely, but that little seed of it is there in the first place. Just as c!Dream’s abuse needs to be addressed as a central part of his character, c!Wilbur’s possessiveness does too - and also outside of the context of their mental health, because they’re both brought on by an internal personality flaw, some fucked-up belief, if that makes sense.

As I said before: c!Wilbur is a mess of a human being that I would hate if I actually met. (irl I would’ve been a SWAG supporter, based on policies, but since this is fiction, I was POG.) But because he’s a character, that flies out the window, and I can love him - not even just as a character, in the sense that I appreciate he’s well-crafted, but in terms of personality and all that shit, while recognizing he’s a kinda crappy guy. Because he’s a character. That’s the fun of it.

[paceypeternathanslawyer]

Anti Dawson Rant #5,000 ;)

I’ve listened to so many Dawson’s Creek podcasts!! I’m in the process of listening to three of them and I have 2 others that i’m planning on listening to. One podcast I stopped listening to cause they spent 20 minutes talking about Dawson scenes but then spent 1 minute talking about Pacey scenes. They were also way too easy on Dawson. One thing i’ve noticed is that most people hate Dawson... which is to be expected. But it seems like there is a small group of Dawson fans that inevitably get pissy when people say bad things about him. And then the podcasters start to feel bad about being hard on Dawson.

I take issue with this concept that I can’t be hard on Dawson because he’s a teenager. 1. When the show begins Dawson is 15 and then each season becomes older and older and also progressively a more shitty human being... but the point is that 15 is not that young. We all have moments of acting like Dawson... every child has selfish and shitty moments. But there is a huge distinction between having moments where you act like a Dawson vs actually being Dawson. To be Dawson is to be self absorbed and selfish 90% of your day. To be Dawson is to be sexist and misogynistic to women. To be Dawson is to slut shame women. To be Dawson is to be possessive and controlling. To be Dawson is to gaslight, manipulate, and abuse your friends. To be Dawson is to bad mouth and abandon your friends when they don’t do and say exactly what you want. No one is perfect, I get that. But I can say with complete honesty is that in all the years I was a teenager, I never saw anyone as bad as Dawson. Once you get to age 15, you should know right from wrong and you should be somewhat empathetic to others especially those you claim to love. I also put some of the blame on his parents. Especially since Mitch was in the boat and watched as Dawson nearly killed Pacey in S3. He could have pushed Dawson away from the wheel of the boat. He could have disciplined him somehow after the fact. But instead the only consequence we see is Dawson being disqualified but no consequences from his parents. Mitch and Gail don’t have a discussion with each other of how they raised a psycho instead they makeout in Gail’s restaurant instead of discussing consequences for their son. But the problem is that we don’t really see Dawson become a good person once he becomes an adult. He still holds a grudge against Pacey most of the time. He cheats on his girlfriend with Joey (and then breaks up with his girlfriend over the phone? I think I read that somewhere, though I haven’t watched S6 yet). Does he apologize to the people he has wronged... from what i’ve seen he certainly doesn’t apologize to Joey for all the abuse and manipulation. But that’s another problem. We all make mistakes especially as a teenager but there should also be a level of awareness and an ability to apologize. Dawson rarely apologizes and when he does it’s always in a minimizing way. 

Dawson stans need to deal with hearing people shit on Dawson because the writers of this show are way too up Dawson’s ass someone needs to call him out for his behavior cause it seems like the writers never will. All the characters in the show pussy foot around his fragile feelings so it’s so cathartic to hear others share the same perspective as me. At times it feels like being gaslit when i’m watching Dawson’s Creek. The writers keep saying what a good guy he is and sometimes all of that makes me feel like i’m going crazy. It’s such a relief to hear podcasters who aren’t afraid to speak out against Dawson.

I think that if people hadn’t begun speaking out against Dawson... the scourge that is the “nice guy” trope on TV, would still be a popular trope. I think it’s important to speak out against Dawson’s kind of behavior so that the new generation will know what kind of behavior will and will not be acceptable. 

My last point is this.... One of the reasons I bad mouth Dawson so much is that I care more about defending Pacey, Joey, Jen and anyone else who was hurt by Dawson’s abuse and slut shaming. Dawson stans are so concerned about defending Dawson that they neglect to defend those who have been hurt by Dawson’s shitty behavior.

Edit. I think it’s also important to say that I don’t condone shitting on real teenagers. Dawson is a fictional character so Dawson’s feelings are not hurt by my words lol. I say let kids be kids and leave the raising and consequences to the parents. But I will speak out against fictional teenagers because maybe real kids will learn right and wrong if enough of us speak the truth.

[luna-rainbow]

1, 3, 19 & 23 for the ask game

Thanks for the ask! I've answered #1 here and #23 here.

3 Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

I'm very slow in following people (because my dash is already so busy and I'm a bit compulsive about seeing everything D=). I think during the early post-TFATWS days when fandom was particularly vitriolic, I did unfollow 1 or 2 people for their opinions, but mainly I've unfollowed people for dumb reasons like I realised 90% of their posts were about fandoms or things I had no idea about (which is why I'm so slow in following people these days because I don't want people to think I later unfollowed them because I'm upset, because 99% of the time it's not that).

Erm I feel like I might be digging myself a bit of a hole with this next bit but if you've regularly interacted with my posts trust me I remember you (although some of you guys sneakily change your usernames and I'm just like D= where did that person go??). If you've regularly left comments or we've had regular reblogging conversations, I love you like a mutual, I'm just old and grumpy and unable to deal with Tumblr's endlessly scrolling dash.

19 What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

I think this applies to all fandoms, but the way that a portion of the fandom can only deal in absolutes. People (and well-rounded characters) don't fit neatly into whatever pigeonhole you want to assign them to. Sometimes they might be a victim, sometimes they might be an oppressor, sometimes they might be kind, sometimes they might be ignorant, and sometimes they are intentionally bigoted. I hope that these fans are kinder to themselves and the people around them in real life, and accept that when people make mistakes they should be given a chance to change...and not have that mistake held against them for the rest of their life if they do change. I think this is also a by-product of online culture that preserves mistakes for 10-20 years, whereas in the past you might say some dumb thing to your high school friends in your ignorant youth and not have that unearthed by the rabid Twitter crowd as your career takes flight.

The thing I dislike about fandoms based on fiction is...the inability of some people to accept discussions on a Doylist level. I do get that some people don't want to break that 4th wall...but like, there's no need to go after the people who enjoy talking about things from beyond that wall?

[thesoundofanicefall]

This is pretty random, but I’m exhausted of seeing Yuunoa hate. Like srly. I can’t even look at ONS Reddit, Instagram or Twitter without reading any mean comments towards Yuunoa or even Shinoa. Not that you have to ship them or like a certain character but if you don’t, then let the other fans enjoy their preferences... I’ve given up on the fandom long ago, I’m enjoying the story by myself (Kagami u better give us a happy ending-) and you guys that share some pretty cool theories and analyses :)

Hey dear anon! Hope you had a good day till now!

This is really sad to see how much this case bothered you to the point you left the fandom and following the story from behind like this....

I said this many times before that yes, ONS fandom is a little fandom and with not that much fans but unfortunatelly between those few fans more than 90% of them are ANTIES.

This is a very big different between being a fan and being an anti.

Like I personally do hate character X to no end and no point ok? But did I ever made fun of that X character and insulted its fans?

Did I shit on that X character's FANS because I just simply hate the X character and they just simply found comfort in that character and like it?

People like that are disgusting and I truly feel sorry about them they are really tragic people with maybe a hard life behind their phone and they are too fake on social media too for sure.

I was also in fandoms like Noragami fandom and Black Butler fandom before too and ofc those were anties too but not this much! ONS fandom is something as toxic as AOT fandom just by the difference that ONS fandom is far smaller than AOT one.

I mean I don't understand what kind of happiness these kind of people can gain in bullying a character and its fans?

Do they feel happy and satisfield? Because if yes then unfortunatelly they are under one of the most saddedst illness.

Or I saw that even sometimes people do these kind of things to gain friends in this fandom and people prise them!

Just like bruh! You want to make friends and like people to prise you that much that you let yourself to break someone's heart? Over a fictional character you do let yourself and dare to break a real one's heart?

Why really?

Is it that hard for you not to talk (or at least not to INSULT!!) the character you dislike?

Is it that hard for you to spread LOVE instead of HATE?

Ugh all I can tell you is that leave them be.

Some people in this world just needs treatments and you can't give them all that or if you'll try they will only hurt you.

Then just let them be and continue the story from behind and try to find few but good friends and keep them for this case only.

Nothing in this world doesn't deserve your saddness or your breaking heart specially a fictional story.

I just hope one day people can learn to respect each others opinions and try to spread love instead of hate that's not even hard really!

Glad that my account could made you feel even a bit good this really means a lot to me and I am happy to hear this of people it means I did my job well! And so this makes me to be proud of myself a lot!

Please take care of yourself a lot dear anon and don't let anyone to dare to hurt you.

Always be happy nothing in this world doesn't deserve your saddness or your happiness to turn to saddness.

I wish for you the bests where ever you are ^^💖💖

[mooglesorts]

man. it's weird, because there's a lot of things about me that are Very Badger Primary, to the point where i would probably pick it with a strong bird model over anything else at this point... except that i hate dehumanization. i saw primaries described recently as 'things you wouldn't be you anymore if you went against,' and more than just about anything else that's it. even when i think people are monsters, i can't see them as not human; i'd be hard put to define exactly what i consider a 'monster,' but it's more about like. good faith than personhood, i suppose?

it's not necessarily a permanent status to be one--people can change--but my deeply held instinct is that once you have done something monstrous you will always be a person who has been a monster by your own choices, and that it's your duty to learn how to accept that while still living your life, and act accordingly from thereon out. you have to reconcile that you are a person with the fact that some doors are closed to you now, and it's up to you to decide what you do from there.

just. like. even when i hate someone and as far as i'm concerned they can go fuck themself, even in the multiple Heavily Badger social environments i've been in over the course of my life--church, progressive circles, the way the structure of the internet kind of just affects you in general--even on occasions where i've gotten swept away and given in to the pressure to dehumanize (or perform it) for a minute, there's always, always been a voice in the back of my head saying this is a person. this is a person. this is a person. this isn't right.

unintentional dehumanization sets off my '...should we really be doing this? we are getting into not good territory here, it's time to pull up and start questioning' alarms. explicit, intentional, purposeful dehumanization sets off the whole ass tornado sirens. if people on my side are doing it it's enough to throw me into a system-destabilizing crisis, because NO NO NO I WANT TO GET OFF THIS RIDE, I WANT NO PART OF THESE PEOPLE'S MORAL SYSTEM, I FEEL UNCLEAN. it's a good way to make sure i will never, ever, ever trust someone again.

things that are Really Really Badger, off the top of my head (after the cut because Long and trauma talk):

[[MORE]]

---

-i've always loved playing adoptable games, pet simulators, etc? any game with randomly generated characters that are Yours Now and a Community, in a deeply badgery way. including games where they can die (the satisfying part is making sure they don't). except that, no matter how much fun the gameplay is, if it gets to the point where they start feeling disposable, and the only way to really keep playing is to stop humanizing them, i lose interest. it's super fucking depressing. it feels like part of me dying inside a little. i don't like it at all.

-i've always been drawn to fandoms and roleplaying communities. i was fiercely loyal to, and proud of, my first rp community on dragoncave as a 13-year-old. when my abusive mom found out about it and completely isolated me for half a year, the promise of being able to make it back to them--just sneakier this time--kept me going; when i finally got back and the group had drifted apart in my absence, it.... was absolutely devastating. i never really recovered from it. even then, i spent years trying to get the group back together every now and then, until i finally gave up.

-i am always keenly, painfully aware of the life cycle of a community. every time i hear the sentiment 'you guys are all great and i love this group' my stomach drops, because i know it's only a matter of time before things go sour or the group dissolves. rp groups, skype chats/discord servers, fandoms, you name it, i am always bracing myself or staying away entirely to avoid the inevitable and it hurts. and it hurts to see people taking part in a community i don't dare be part of, which makes lurking in fandoms... really rough. frankly, it takes me a lot of courage every time i express my appreciation for the shc community because i've been burned so many times.

-on that note: i went through some really traumatic stuff at the end of 2020 that completely turned my life upside down, and i was doing bad until i stumbled across the shc community. the moment i started engaging, it was a huge boost to my mental health, and my ability to cope with circumstances under which i was about to break down spectacularly. and it has been ever since! contributing to The Group Project and seeing other folks being friendly with each other gives me the happy feelings.

-i used to go out of my way to build and run spaces, mainly fandom and rp spaces, and took a lot of pride in engineering them so that they Functioned Well. unfortunately it wore me the hell down over the years for Burnt Badger Reasons, and now i'm too jaded, bitter, and exhausted to give a shit about being a mod/community leader anymore because of it lmao

-among those burnt badger things i relate HARD to the Red Ledger narrative. hoo boy.

-i wish i could find it again, but there was an mlp comic i saw once which went into luna's observations of what each element of harmony Means. with the element of friendship, she says that twilight has a massive amount of love to give; right now it's all focused on celestia, but when she learns to expand it outward she'll have grown into her full potential as a person, and she'll change the world. that struck a chord with how i used to feel, hard, and it's really stuck with me ever since. (hello, unhealthy snake model)

-emphasis on 'used to feel,' lmao

-got super invested in a really toxic '''mental health''' community at a low point in my life; exploded HARD trying to help everyone i could; got into vicious, protracted fights with the shitty mods for years about the harmful way they ran their community until i finally managed to go 'fuck this it's not getting better' and leave.

-had to numb myself emotionally to the people around me for a long time once i really started learning about mental health and trauma stuff, because now i was seeing signs of their pain and baggage everywhere i looked, and i couldn't handle not being able to help.

-the imagery with which i think about my bird primary is overwhelmingly negative. whether it's my actual primary or a model, i uh. i feel like a healthy relationship to one's primary doesn't involve associating it with gore.

-i saw a conversation recently about how birds think of morality in terms of 'if you can, you should,' and how that's scary for badgers because their definition of 'can' involves destroying yourself for the sake of that 'should,' and... yeah, that's a mood. that's a BIG mood. thinking about bird primary stuff is hard--and i had to pick up my lion model to deal with it--because it's so easy for me to spiral into a self-shredding spiral of other people are counting on you to do the right thing, how dare you pull back for your own health and sanity. how dare you turn your back for even a minute. how dare you rest. the work is never done.

which is... a very exploded badger approach to exploded bird morality. whoops.

-fix-it and time travel fiction in which Everything Went Right This Time and It's Going to Be Okay are one of my very favorite self-indulgent fantasies. i will enjoy putting characters through the wringer in all kinds of creatively horrific ways which may or may not end on a downer note, certainly, i love that shit, but i will also 90% of the time have a backup version of the arc or dynamic that's softer and lighter and Actually Healthy This Time. it's the dichotomy there that really gets me tbh, a story where Everything Ends Happily by default will mmmaybe pull me in? but stories where there's the constant shadow of this could end horribly, it's supposed to end horribly, and we got a happy fucking ending anyway are just... that shit will make me cry, man.

it's also why i kind of really hate stable time loop stories where it initially looks like this is going to be The Good Timeline this time around, but OOPSIE everything went to shit anyway! we're right back where we started, just like it was meant to be all along! it's a tired cliche by this point and an unsatisfying one for me, and it makes me roll my eyes every time.

-this is relevant to the bird vs. badger because like... my gut instinct is to prioritize people over systems. when shit hits the fan, when someone's fallen into the machinery and is about to get hurt, i don't feel right about it if i just let it happen. i'll break the machinery if i have to to keep it away from them; i won't feel great about that, and it might cause problems, but fuck it, we'll figure it out later. throwing people into the gears of a system when i'm convinced it's the only option makes me feel Awful.

-related to the above, another trope that really speaks to me in fiction is when a character defies the rules of reality through sheer force of will. no, this is not happening, i don't give a shit what the limits are supposed to be. i refuse to let this be the way things are. (there's that lion model.)

-i've just kind of... always wanted to be an Everyone Badger. it makes me sad how much of that i've lost over the years as i've gotten more cynical, but it's what i wish i could be.

---

doubtless i'll think of more the moment i hit send, and there are just as many things about me that are Super Bird Primary, but like... mamma mia that's some spicy badger. the main thing stopping me is the Can't and Refuse to Dehumanize bit. i also... hm. i think i can function okay without a community? they just help a lot, and it sucks when i'm confronted with one i don't have a (stable) place in. any thoughts? is it possible for a bird system's foundation to run so deep that eventually it overrides the bird?

[theonetheycallhannah]

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Prologue: History

Characters: OFC (Shane Benton), OMC (Elliott Thomas)

Summary: Shane Benton is a hard-working physical therapist and a loving girlfriend…but her boyfriend has a less than desirable way of showing it.

In case you’ve fallen behind or want to read more of my drabbles!

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings:  Language, mature themes, angst, infidelity, domestic violence (moderate). Yeah, this may be a tad rough for some readers, but I tried to be mild, and mostly implicit. It was hard still, to see my fictional offspring go through this, even if she gives as good as she gets!

Author’s Note: Oh, y’all. When I needed a break from the sweet tenderness of Chapter 8, I came here and put Shane through some hell. (You can blame one of my friends I was talking about for this angst as they’re the one who put me into angsty headspace by cheating on my other friend! It’s been weighing on me! But I guess at least I’ve been able to use it!) I really hope you enjoy a bit of backstory on our heroine! I really liked writing her ferocity.

Also, I meant to have this posted yesterday, but because of some tragedy in one of my other fandoms (and the world, in general! Rest In Power, Chadwick Boseman!) and a bit of craziness in my personal life (my HS bestie wanted to hang out this weekend, so I spent a lot of time with her…also…I’ve been talking to a real live fella! OMG! And it’s entirely too soon to say that I like him, but like…I very much do…but he’s far away and recently single and things are complicated in just, several ways, so it just can’t happen at this point. But…like, we have been talking a ton recently, and…sigh. I have found it difficult to focus on the matters at hand. But, rest assured, I’m working on Chapter Nine, and it will be up just as soon as I find my rhythm!

Disclaimer: Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism. (Well, this isn’t a super fun chapter, I guess!)

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Hope I’m not forgetting anyone! If you want to be notified when I post a new chapter or work, I’ll be happy to add you to my tag list! (Also, if you’ve asked and aren’t on the list...well...that would be because I forgot to add you and reminding me will not offend or upset me. I think I might have ADD, or something, and being reminded about things is kind of how I survive!) Stricken blogs are getting personal messages from me when a new chapter is uploaded because Tumblr’s faulty tagging system will not stand in the way of me delivering what the people want!(?) lol! (Although…their lackadaisical notification system might…sorry for that. I have no control. lol!)

X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X

5 years ago-

Shane got home from work, exhausted. The new electronic documentation system they'd just implemented was kicking her ass. And Anita's, whom she constantly had to help with it, all the while hearing Anita bellow "When can I retire?!" which lost its charm on about the third day.

"Elliott, I'm home." She didn't smell anything cooking, despite the fact that she knew he was off all day today. Whatever. She was used to him doing virtually nothing but whatever hipster bullshit he got up to on Instagram and YouTube, trying to get off the ground as an influencer with a brand…spare her. Since when did that become a job? She didn’t mind to get takeout though, if only she knew he wasn’t cooking. Maybe she should have asked. "Honey, I could have picked something up if--" she was startled by him in the doorway to the hall, in only his anime boxers, looking like he was trying to not be surprised she was home. "What?"

"Nothing, just…excited to see you! How was your day?" Elliott asked, scratching the back of his neck, displacing his mid-length, slightly moppy light brown hair, already disheveled. That was his tell. Something was up. She knew it.

"What's going on? Are you hiding something from me?"

"Why would you ask me that? Don't you trust me, baby?!" he guilted. Knowing just the buttons to push for empathy. It wasn't gonna work today. The machine was all out of that selection and full of his bullshit currency.

"Now that you mention it, no. I sure as hell don't." she walked around to enter the hall and investigate the rest of the house. "Let me through." he wouldn't budge. He had the advantage of physical size, but she was still wearing her work uniform including sneakers…he was more than half naked. She stomped hard on his instep and smacked him in the ear as he doubled over. She felt marginally bad for that in the moment…at best he'd get mild tinnitus for a while. At worst, he could have permanent hearing damage. She'd check later for blood coming out of his ear and see if she should feel worse about it then.

She rounded the corner to their bedroom. The quilt her grandma had made her was carelessly crumpled with the top sheet and blanket at the foot board. She noticed a swatch of an orangey red lipstick on her pillow. The same shade smudged onto the full mouth of the panicking strawberry blonde frantically donning clothes in front of her antique mirror, and the same shade, she was guessing, that was smeared across certain places on Elliott’s body that were now covered by those boxers that she had always hated. You know what, Elliott, she thought to herself. Fuck Bleach, and fuck you!

"I'm sure you're a lovely person who's just been lied to by a very charming and manipulative man, but…you still only have ten seconds to get to my front door before I call the cops." Shane threatened the girl, who couldn't have been more than twenty-one…and he was thirty-three.

"She's my guest." Elliott defended.

"You're not even on the lease. Your credit was too bad." she said over her shoulder while still squared off with the girl. She turned back to her. "I'm trying to be calm here, sweetie. But do not make me tell you even one more time to get out of my…fucking…house." the girl picked up her shoes and a small messenger bag from the floor near where Shane stood, keeping as wide a berth as she could, and skittered out of the room in terror.

"How many times, Elliott?"

"Don't do this, Shane."

"No, I think this is something we should do. Count the times you’ve broken my trust. Kissed another girl, fooled around with one, fucked one…I mean…I've never caught you in our bed before, so this LOOKS like a first…I sure hope it is…because I don't recall you doing any laundry since you've lived here. And if I thought you let me sleep in the same sheets that you…I can't even look at you, you son of a bitch."

"It's not what you think, Shane." he said, calmly, as if he'd simply picked up the wrong consistency of peanut butter from the store. The wrong brand of milk. Not that he ever did the shopping.

"Bullshit. Bull. Shit. Elliott. I come home and find you like this, and there's a girl in OUR bedroom, and her lipstick is all over MY pillow, and your balls, no doubt. Not gonna make you prove it, because at this point, I don't give a shit anymore. I've lost count of how many times I've forgiven you, even times you didn't care enough to ask me to. Times you probably don't even know that I know about. But it's done. You're gonna pack up all your things. And you're gonna be gone by the time I get home from work tomorrow. And don't expect me to be late…because I will not be."

"You're acting crazy. You can't do this. Where will I go, Shane?"

"That's not my concern anymore. Find an apartment that accepts Likes and subscriptions and followers as rent and cherish it. But your free ride here is done. I'm not your mom, your maid, your cook, or…anything to you anymore, Elliott."

He was getting angry now. His nostrils flared and his breaths came more quickly.

"Is this because you're fucking another guy? Hmm?" he got in her space, but she was out of the bedroom and back into the hallway. She shouted back.

"Oh, NOW you're gonna try to deflect this onto me? When in holy hell would I have time to get with anyone but you, when we don't even have sex anymore?! It's been, what, two, three months?"

"You work with guys."

"You have no idea who I am. To think that I would do something like that. No idea at all. If I don't have time at home, I certainly don't have time for sex at work, and you can ask any of my coworkers, male OR female. That place is an unsexy, unholy shit show 90% of the time. And the other ten, it's just above bearable."

"Well, I'm still not going anywhere."

"You are. Like I said. You're not on the lease. And all I have to do is call the landlord and tell him you're here without my permission and he'll have the cops here." she had gotten a glass of water…although she needed something stronger, and was standing by the sink with it. Her mouth was getting dry. She couldn't take much more of this without breaking.

"You wouldn't really do that to me though. I'm the only man who can give you what you want." he grabbed her by the arm, hard.

"Let go of me, Elliott."

"Or what." he asked for it. She got the other instep, his groin, and threw water in his face. She grabbed her purse and bolted out the door.

She got quickly on the phone with Heather her closest friend who had recently been hired on as a secretary for her clinic.

"Yello." she said, cheerful.

"Two things: can I crash at your place tonight and what kind of phone do you have?" she asked.

"Yes and a Galaxy something, I dunno, but what the fresh hell are you talking about?"

"I'll explain when I get there. I’m on my way to CVS for some essentials. Do you need anything?"

"Sounds like we need wine and ice cream!"

"Already on the list." She thanked Heather and hung up, calling her landlord.

“This’s Sam.” She heard over the receiver.

“Sam, I’m sorry to bother you, but I have a situation at the house.”

“What’s goin’ on?” He asked concerned. She’d never rented from anyone so kind. He’d become almost family. Like an uncle.

“Long story short, pest control. I’m kicking Elliott out and he has until the time I get home from work tomorrow. I told him you’d be there with the cops if he didn’t comply because he’s not on the lease. Is there any way you can help me and make that good?”

“He hurt ya, Shane?”

“Not, umm…not physically.” Although she had been rubbing the place on her arm where he’d grabbed her, certain there would be a bruise.

“That’s all I need to know. I’ve got a buddy or two on the squad here in town. I’m sure they won’t mind to help me out. You need anything?”

She held back the tears until she could hang up. “I’m staying over at a friend’s tonight and headed into CVS now for a few things I didn’t take time to grab after I kneed him in the groin and ran out.” She had just pulled into the parking lot.

“Well I’m nearby if you need anything when you’re back home.”

“Thanks. I guess just watch for smoke from the place for now. I don’t know what he might do, honestly.”

Up Next: Prologue: Onset of Injury (Sy)

[masterthespianduchovny]

David is dating a woman 5 years older than his daughter who he refuses to acknowledge in public. He writes about a girl having sex with her stepfather and excuses it. That’s what some of his detractors, and even his fans, don’t like about him and find problematic. Then there's his historic sexist/ misogynistic and homophobic comments and his blatant arrogance (even Gillian called him arrogant). Gillian doesn't pay close attention to most of these things because she's hardly around him. I mean, hell, Judi Dench was friends with Kevin Spacey (they hung out all the time, not just occasionally) and Harvey Weinstein yet she apparently didn't know they were both predators.

Let’s break this down:

How is who David involved with any of our business, especially when we don’t know the specifics of their relationship? Celebs literally don’t need to tell us who they’re dating or fucking or whatever. How is this a mark against him bc he hasn’t acknowledged he’s involved with MP? I can understand being grossed out by his relationships due to the age gap, but him not acknowledging isn’t a mark against him.

There are many celebs in secret relationships and marriages that we don’t know about. Janet Jackson had two SECRET marriage, both of which, were revealed after they separated. Her second marriage was for 10 years. Is that a mark against her or is that different?

From what I’ve read and understand about this book is that it’s partially based on a Hollywood AD character and explaining a plot point isn’t excusing or justifying it. I believe David said authors write about difficult things, why is this a personal flaw when he writes about fictional people and events. Do you hate Stephen king for writing about murder? Hell, I’m writing a book that involves sexual abuse, should I be hated when I publish that? Most people aren’t writing about personal experiences or advocating for the shit they write about.

You may not like the subject matter, but I’m going to need a little more than “he wrote about a girl having sex with her stepfather.” And doesn’t this much involve a cult???

People hated David before this book and MP, these two things are just convenient excuses. And, honestly, I don’t see why anyone would hate him over a book.

Anon, give me recent examples of David being homophobic, misogynistic, and sexist. I’m not saying any of these things aren’t wrong or problematic, however, these things are built into our society. I’m also not saying you can’t take issue with what David said, but has he grown since then? Is he the same or worse?

You can literally find problematic shit about not just ever celeb, but everyone. To hold someone forever accountable for what they said in the past without accounting for growth is ass backwards and says you don’t care about equality, but looking down on people. Admittedly, there are some things that people can’t move beyond, except I don’t think many of his critics truly care about his problematic comments other than to find a reason to shit on him.

Gillian also said she found him charming among other things. Why are you all so selective about what Gillian has said about him? I’ve never shied away from Gillian’s criticisms about David. I don’t just focus on the good, I show both sides of their relationship and that she said herself he wasn’t the only one poorly behaving.

Gillian’s been around him long enough to make a determination on his character. She isn’t unobservant and knows far more than you ever will.

Here’s the thing: you guys can’t have it both ways. You can’t say Gillian hates David because she knows he’s the worst, then argue she hangs around him because she doesn’t know the truth about him. Yalls rationale switches like the wind.

Just admit it: Gillian likes him and they are friends. If y’all weren’t so hellbent on taking on their issues from the 90s and pretending Gillian hated David, y’all wouldn’t have needed to scramble now.