#hate me they're giving i can fix him but delusional me

[teacoff]

A piece of shibari Butchlander wip that no one asks. See you in October

[into-crazy]

don't wanna miss a thing

》 chapter 3

Negan Smith x Female Reader

Non-apocalyptic AU // The Walking Dead AU

Other Characters(mentioned): Rick Grimes, Lori Grimes, and Carl Grimes

Summary: You get harassed by some guys on your way home and someone comes to your rescue. They walk you home, reflecting on moments from your shared past.

Warnings- mature language, alcohol consumption, age gap(reader's in her early 20s), slow burn, angst, comfort, fluff, ages 18+

Other chapters & info -> RIGHT HERE

💕divider by @saradika-graphics

It was a painful walk down the driveway.

Even in your state, you still respectfully chose not to cut through the grass for a shortcut. Rick was proud of his grass, he worked hard to keep it nice and healthy. But now that you were finally out of there you let your tears fall freely.

You were so fucking stupid. Completely delusional to think that you could ever be with Negan. Who were you kidding? There was never a chance. You're just a kid to him. You've always been, and he'll never see you as anything other than that. Though what hurt you even more was seeing that he had his eyes set on someone else. You know that you have no right to be upset. Negan doesn't owe you anything, he can be with who ever he wants. However it doesn't stop the fact that deep down inside of you it still hurt.

Reaching the sidewalk, you turn towards your house and continue on. The sun is close to setting, casting long shadows all over the ground. That is how you noticed a vehicle coming up from behind, by it's shadow. At first you didn't think anything of it, assuming that it was going to keep going in the direction it was heading. But then it suddenly slowed and someone called out to you from the passenger window.

"Hey there, cutie!"

Wiping your eyes, you look up to see that it's a group of guys in a small SUV. They look like they could be high school seniors or college freshmen. Blasting their music loud enough for the whole street to hear. Whatever they were listening to it's rather obnoxious.

"Where are you heading off to?" The same guy from the passenger window asks you. You spot the can of beer in his hand. Well that's great, they're drinking in a moving vehicle. Hopefully they have a designated driver.

"No where," you return indifferently. "I'm just going home."

"She's not into you bro." The driver states to him lowly.

However he brushes it off and tries again. "Shut up man.. So we're uh, heading over to a party tonight over on the east side. How about I get your number and maybe I could see you there?"

The way he asked you felt as though he wasn't even asking you at all. It sounded more like a demand. That or he was rather confident that you were going to give him your number. Either way you weren't interested.

"No thanks." You toss back, hoping that they'll get the hint and move on.

Your rejection is heard by the other guys, they immediately poke fun at their friend. Which only stirs him on more.

He then attempts to cover up his embarrassment with a laugh, licking his lips before replying, "well see, that doesn't work for me sweetheart."

You stop in your tracks, turning to look at him in shock and wondering if you had heard that right. The arrogant smirk on his face indicates that you had. You hated hearing the word sweetheart come from his mouth. All of a sudden you start to feel very exposed. Remembering that you are wearing nothing but a bikini because your clothes are in your bag. It doesn't help that every one of those guys are leering at you like you're a hooker selling on the street. You nervously clutch on to the bag around your shoulder.

He opens his mouth again to speak. "So how about it? Give me your number and we'll meet up. Then I can fix that little attitude problem you got." He winks at you while his friends laugh and exchange high fives.

This whole situation makes your stomach churn. You want nothing more for them to leave you alone. Anger bubbles up in your throat too quickly before you can contain it.

"I said no!" You snap at him. "Now do me a favor and fuck off!"

He scoffs at that. "You bitch!"

He launches his beer at you from the window. Luckily it misses you. Instead it lands right by your feet. The can smashes against the concrete with a loud crashing sound and beer slashes all over your feet. It startles you into dropping your bag on the floor.

Everyone in the car breaks out into a laughing fit. You, well you stand there. Dumbfounded and utterly defeated. And you didn't think this day could get any worse, yet it had. This was the soggy cherry on top of a shit sundae.

"Hey!" A voice is unexpectedly heard from behind you, snapping the guys out of their guffawing.

The one who launched the beer motions at the driver to go. "Oh shit, let's go!"

The car speeds off as Negan rushes over to your side. It catches you by surprise, because what is he doing here?

"That's it- get the hell out of here!" He shouts at the car before mumbling under his breath, "little pricks." He then turns his attention towards you. "Hey.. you okay?"

You break down in tears, hugging yourself for comfort. Negan wraps his jacket around your shoulders to cover you up. Then he pulls you close, wrapping his arms around you. You hug him back tightly and sob into his chest. Not caring anymore as you let it all go.

"I know, it's alright. I've got you now." His voice is low and soft as he strokes your hair. "Come on, let's get you home."

You nod at that, using the back of your hand to wipe away your tears. He collects your bag off the ground and walks you the rest of the way to your house.

"Rick send you to check on me?"

A scoff leaves his lips, "No. Rick didn't send me to do shit. I came because I wanted to make sure my girl got home safely. Good thing I did, too."

Negan calling you his girl would have brought a smile and a blush to your face, if you weren't still upset.

Coming up to the front door, he thinks of what to say. "Listen I uh.." his sentence trails off as he gently hands you your bag. "You should go on inside. I can come by for the jacket tomorrow."

There's no response or movement from you. When he turns to leave you snap up to look at him. "Stay?"

He immediately stops at that. Meeting your sad eyes, he doesn't say anything.

"Please stay with me for a while?" You plead quietly, hands clutching tighter on to the jacket.

Sighing deeply, he takes a second to ponder on it before agreeing. "Alright."

It's silent again as you unlock the door and step inside. He follows right after you, taking the liberty of closing and locking the door behind him. The chill of the air inside brushes against your skin, making you shiver. It didn't help that your hair was still damp from the pool.

Negan notices that you're cold. "You wanna go get cleaned up and put on something comfortable?" You flash him a worried pout and he chuckles. "Don't worry, I'll wait down here for you. I won't sneak out or anything. Promise."

You take his word for it. But before you ascend up the stairs you make a suggestion, "I don't want to come back down afterwards. Would you come up with me? You can wait in my room."

His eyes widen, he's taken aback by your invitation. Even though it was an innocent request it was rather unexpected, and that was what threw him off. Plus he's never seen or been in your room before. He briefly clears his throat, "I mean, sure. Is that what you want?"

"Yes," you return. "I just.. I'd feel better knowing you're close by. Knowing that I'm not alone."

There was no way he could say no to you. He hums and follows you up the stairs all the way to your bedroom.

The sun had finally set, casting the last bit of light through the curtains into your room. You navigate through the dimly lit space to turn on a table lamp beside your bed. As the light flicks on Negan takes in your bedroom for the first time. It was certainly a reflection of your personality, and that in itself made him feel welcome. He notices that you didn't change rooms since you're not in the master. He doubts that your aunt took it over either but that's a question he'll save for another day.

You scramble around, picking a few things up from the floor and moving others out of the way. Negan stood there, lazily following your movements. You collect a fresh pair of clothes from the dresser and let out a small sigh, "I'm going to go wash up."

He keeps his focus on you as you slide off his jacket and set it down on the bed. "Take your time. I'll be here." He assures.

"Feel free to sit on the bed if you want. I won't mind." And with that, you leave the room.

Negan decides to look around some more. He caught a glimpse of a photo collage on the wall, so he went over for a closer look. There were pictures of your parents, some with the three of you together. All with huge smiles and warm vibes. There were a couple snaps of the Grimes, looking like the picture perfect family as usual. One photo was of him and your dad in the garage, laughing as they posed for the camera. Negan remembers all the good times he'd spent with him.

He then came across the only photo of you and him up there. Right in the middle, it was a selfie you'd taken with him a while back. Your smile was so bright, and he couldn't help but notice the glimmer in your eyes. He really liked that photo. Negan spots your camera on the desk near the pictures. He remembers how you used to carry it everywhere, capturing the moments up on the wall above. You don't carry it around anymore, not since your parents..

A few more steps and he finds himself by the window. Peaking through the curtains, he's got a perfect view of his house from here. Everything from his driveway to the front door. It makes him wonder if you've ever watched him from here.

The sound of the door creaking brings him to turn, finding you coming back into the room. Your hair is damp from the shower this time, and you're wearing a pair of sleep shorts and a cropped tshirt. It was a bit revealing, however the man has already seen you in a bikini so you didn't think much of it. Besides, he'd told you to put on something comfortable and what better than the close you sleep in.

He looks you over briefly. "Feeling better?"

"Yeah, I needed that." You admit. There's a guilty look on your face, like you have something you need to confess. A secret that you can no longer contain. Inhaling sharply you breathe out, "actually, there's something that I need to tell you."

He fixes his gaze on you, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "I know."

**

Flashback:

It was a sad, gloomy day. Even the sky looked melancholy, filling up with puffy grey clouds to shield away the sun. Not allowing the warmth of the rays to reach you or anyone else.

Many people had shown up to pay their respects and offer their condolences for your loss. Most of those people you knew, and very few in which you didn't.

The burial was especially the hardest for you. You couldn't exactly describe the feeling you experienced while watching your parent's caskets being lowered into the ground. You don't think you'll ever be able to describe it. But it was at that moment in which you knew that you would never see them again. At least, not in this life.

Your eyes were red and puffy from crying, and you didn't talk much at all. Relying mostly on head gestures. Only having enough mental energy to mutter a few words to certain people that talked to you. Aunt Rena never left your side throughout the whole event. Even Rick, Lori, and little Carl were always close by. As for Negan, he kept a bit of a distance.

There was already so many people around you, he didn't want to smother you with his presence as well. Though he did come by to offer his own condolences when he had the chance to talk to you more privately. You hugged him tight and never wanted to let him go. He kept you tight in his embrace, letting you hold on to him as long as you needed. It was up until other people came over to talk to you when he had to gently pull back.

It is a quarter to 8 pm. You've been home for a while now. Aunt Rena was exhausted from the day and had went to bed early. You had other plans.

Drained and full of grief, you grabbed a bottle of whiskey from your dad's cabinet and sat on the front porch looking through your family photo album. Since it's the middle of November it is cold. So you brought a blanket to keep warm. You sat by yourself, with shaky hands and teary eyes. Flipping through the pages and pouring glass after glass. Laughing at some of the memories through the photos then taking swigs of your drink when your laughter turns into soft sobs. You probably shouldn't be out here like this but you were. You didn't want your aunt to know, or worry. That you're slowly numbing yourself with alcohol so that you could stop feeling for a while. It seemed to do it's job. As you felt yourself gradually slipping in and out of consciousness.

Negan is pulling into his driveway when he spots you on your porch all by yourself. Immediately he notices that something's not right. You're not moving.

Getting out of his car he rushes over. Calling your name but no response. You are passed out and there's a half empty bottle of whiskey on the table next to you. At first he's very worried and assumes the worst. Though the panic fades when he hears the soft snores coming from you. He checks you over again, you're sound asleep with an open photo album tucked in your arms.

"Shit kid.."

Relief washes over him, though he's concerned with how long you might've been out here. Especially out cold the way you are. It's freezing and you only have a thin blanket wrapped around your body. Brushing some hair out of your face, he could tell you had been crying again. Your cheeks were flushed and dried streams ran down your cheeks and nose. He attempts to wake you up by shaking you gently. When that doesn't work he does it more firmly.

"Y/n.. hey, wake up."

You only mumble and tuck further into your blanket in response. Brows furrowing then letting up as soon as you get comfortable again.

The sight of you made his heart ache. He can't imagine what you're going through, though he really does feel for you. He had lost two of his good friends, but you had lost both your parents. It hurt you both, yet it wasn't a pain in which he would try to compare to yours. He only wanted you to know that you weren't alone. That he will be here for you when you need him. After all you've become his friend, too.

Negan takes the book from your freezing hands and places it on the table before ringing the doorbell. He waits there at the door for a moment until Rena answers.

"Oh Negan, hello." She is surprised to see him at this time of night. "What can I do for you?"

"Hey Rena. I uh, well I found y/n asleep out here on the porch." Stepping aside, he motions over to where you're at.

Rena gasps into her hands, rushing to your side, "I- oh dear, I didn't even know she was out here!" She strokes your hair, a frown on her face as she examines the contents on the table.

"I figured you didn't," Negan shrugs. "I know you wouldn't have left her out here like this."

"Oh no, I would never." She shakes her head. "Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I was asleep, she could have been out here all night."

"She's alright. Gotta get her inside though."

"If she really drank that much, it might be hard to get her up in this state." Your aunt worries.

It's clear to Negan that it would be a rather difficult task for your aunt to do by herself. So he offers his help. "If you want, I can carry her inside."

"Would you?"

"Sure."

Negan carefully scoops you up into his arms and takes you inside. Your aunt follows behind, with the photo album held closely to her chest.

"You can set her down on the couch, she'll be fine there for the night."

He takes you into the living room and lowers you on to the couch. You stir from the movement, slipping in and out of your deep sleep.

Your aunt decides that the cover you currently have won't suffice. "I'm going to run upstairs and grab her another blanket. Can you watch her for a minute?"

Negan nods, a quiet 'yeah' leaving his lips.

Your aunt goes to retrieve the item, leaving Negan with you. The sound of you mumbling grabs his attention.

"What.. what happened?" You ask, fighting to keep your eyes open.

"It's alright sweetheart." Negan shushes you. "You're safe. You fell asleep outside but you're inside now."

Giggling to yourself, you reply, "oh yeah.." You briefly look around, recognizing your surroundings. Last you remembered, you were outside on the porch. "How'd I get in here?"

Negan drops to his haunches directly beside you. "I carried you."

"You carried me?"

"Sure did." There's a proud grin on his face after saying that.

Taken aback, your eyes gleam up at him. "Thank you."

"It's not a problem." He brushes it off. "Just want to make sure you're okay. Your aunt's coming back with a blanket. Now close your eyes and get some sleep."

"M'kay." You shut your eyes, letting out a deep sigh. "Hm.. Negan?"

He leans in a bit closer. "Yeah?"

"I love you." It comes out just above a whisper. Though the room was so quiet that he had heard it perfectly clear as if you'd said it aloud.

He chuckles awkwardly in response because you have never said that to him before. But you are drunk and he is your friend, so he figured you were just saying sappy shit. Like the kind of things you'd tell the girl holding your hair back while you're throwing up the alcohol you've ingested in a toilet. He gives your shoulder a playful nudge, muttering back, "love ya too, kid."

With your eyes still closed, you shake your head. "No Negan, I don't mean as a friend.." Your voice is low and soft. "I love, love you. Always have." That is the last thing you say before drifting off to sleep.

Your confession comes as a total shock to him. He is left completely speechless, wondering if you'd really meant what you said. However, he doesn't want to wake you again to find out. There are so many questions going through his mind when your aunt comes back. Pulling him away from you and halting his thoughts.

"There now," Rena places a thicker covering on top of you. Negan stands there, staring at you while she tucks you in. "She should be alright down here for the night. Thank you so much for bringing her in."

Her gratitude snaps him out of his haze. "Not a problem, you're welcome."

Your words are all Negan thinks about on his walk home. You love him? Did you really mean that? It's possible that you were just spewing nonsense since you were intoxicated. But what if it was the truth and it had managed to slip out because you were drunk? He believes in that old saying, "a drunk mind speaks a sober heart." So if what you'd said is true, then how long have you had these feelings for him? Must have been a long time, you did say you always have.

Negan thinks back, to a few instances where he had caught you looking at him a little too long. The times you've blushed because of something he said. Moments where you wanted to be near him. That twinkle in your eyes every single time you looked at him. He had always thought he was crazy when even the tiniest of a suspicion that you were interested in him popped into his head. Maybe she's got a little crush. Nah, she doesn't.. She's looking at me like that again. Cut the shit, she's only being nice.. Those suspensions bugged him for a while. And each time they'd come up he would dismiss them.

The thing is, he has always been very fond of you, but he wouldn't think of you in that way. He couldn't. There was no way. You were his friend's daughter.

Knowing what he knows now, however, he doesn't think he could forget or brush that away.

**

[cringefailvox]

Hello! Fanfic questions! Numbers 15, 26, and 27 for the meteor shower series :D

meteor shower

15. talk about the characters' struggles and how you decided on those.

HOO BOY.

rosie: rosie struggles a lot with Wants To Fix People syndrome that is not helped by her self-awareness about it. she's a meddler, an enabler and a nosy bitch, and these traits lend themselves pretty easily to self-recrimination when she fails to steer a situation in the direction she wanted it to go. she gives herself grace, but she definitely feels responsible for vox and alastor since she introduced them, and since their falling out puts her directly in the middle, she's thrust into the role of mediator, however incidentally. she misses her boys and she wants that closeness back! but she has to come to terms with the fact that while she can try her best, at a certain point, the impetus falls on them to actually listen when she speaks, and it's not her fault that she can't fix everything. girl they need to be making this up to YOU.

vox: anxious attachment issues + rejection sensitive dysphoria + superiority complex + greedy bastard who gets off on exploiting vulnerable people, doesn't understand why his vigilante punitive justice besties hate capitalism when it's so fun + in crippling unrequited love with the radio demon = messy bitch activities. please pick a struggle

alastor: my guy is in the g-ddamn trenches in this series, rip. lots of stuff is wrong with him but in particular, the second installment highlights his struggles with amatonormativity and abandonment issues when he's briefly convinced rosie & vox don't need him anymore now that they're dating (they're not; he's delusional). he struggles a lot with his aroaceness, mostly because he doesn't think he's broken but he does feel bitter and resentful about the prioritization of romance over friendship, and DITITS is just one long relationship anarchy angst fest bc he's so meirl.

26. share your favorite detail(s).

from time has changed the metaphor: i've mentioned this before, but the parallels of rosie calming vox down from a panic attack after the radiostatic divorce / vox calming alastor down from a panic attack after the fight with adam in the exact same way <3

from dragging its tail in the sea: the running joke about the changing painting in alastor's room at cannibal town, because it still makes me giggle every time i re-read it

27. share a piece of lore you made up for the story.

all the little bits about alastor's deal!! i'm a roo truther in my heart and i loved peppering in all the hints and motifs about the eyes, alastor being bound to silence, the idea that she only approached him with a deal when he was at his very lowest + after decades of inflicting low-key psychological torture on him -- oh yeah, delicious. i don't have any concrete ideas about this but i did very much enjoy crafting the Implications

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

On Yearning

Any blank spaces are not meant to be there, I will fix them as soon as they show up so please just check again a little later if that happens to you.

Mayans MC Masterlist

Part four of a A Gentle Kind of Love

Contains: Fluff, mutual pining, angst (violence, endless longing, a cliffhanger, possible major character death) slow burn.

6.2K words

Comment if you want to be tagged/removed or follow #a gentle kind of love.

Yearning - A deep longing, especially when accompanied by tenderness or sadness. Alternately an instance of such longing.

Temple was full when Marcus started talking, "I just spoke to Jax, they're going to deal with it on their end. What do we know about these Hidden Order fucks?"

Coco sighed, "not much, other than a single tattoo, they don't validate and they don't make noise, they've been linked to multiple crimes but their made cash source is meth and counterfeiting."

"That's it?" Bishop didn't sound happy.

Coco nodded, "Juice is going to tell us the second he knows something new, until then we need to be on the lookout."

Manny rubbed his face, his tone angry, "and y/n, how long is she going to be at risk."

Bishop waved his hand, "we're not going to let anything happen to her and it's not like you two hate each other, you'll be fine at her place for a few days."

"And if it lasts longer than that?" Part of Manny was hoping it would.

Angel huffed, "like that matters."

Bishop slammed his hand on the desk, "enough, y/n will be fine, we need to find these Nazi fucks before someone gets hurt."

They made you wait at the bar until they were done, it took a while but they all filed out of the Temple and Manny shot you a smile as he walked up to you, "I need to go by my place and pack a bag, then I'll be all yours."

You smiled, "I'll put some fresh sheets on my bed."

His eyes went wide, "I thought you had a pull out?"

You nodded, "I do, you can have the bed and I'll take the couch."

He went to respond but you cut him off, "please, don't fight me on this. You're already putting yourself out by staying with me for God knows how long, the least you can do is take the bed."

He sighed, "fine but I'm cooking half the food."

"Alright, I'll take that."

He smiled, "great, I'll get Coco to take you home, I'll rush so we can get some sleep tonight."

You sighed, "you don't need to do that. Tomorrow is the weekend, it's not like I need to be well rested for work."

He shook his head, "nope, I can't have you all sleepy, we're going to hang out all day and have so much fun."

You giggled, "oh I'm sure. My cats are never going to leave you alone, have fun showering with three cats staring at you."

He chuckled, "I thought Mr Butts was the only perv."

You smiled, "all cats are pervs, Mr Butts just takes it to the next level."

He returned your smile and reached his hand out, landing it on your upper arm, "I'm not going to let anything happen to you and if we have fun in the meantime well that's a bonus."

He headed off and you waited for Coco but to your annoyance, Angel was the one that wandered over to you with a smile, "ready to head home?"

You sighed, "if you say one word about me and Manny I swear to God I will…"

He raised his hand, "I ain't going to give you shit."

You could tell by his grin he was lying.

Angel rode beside you while you drove home, pulling up next to you on your driveway as you walked inside, "what?"

He smiled, "nothing, I bet you're happy to have Manny all to yourself this weekend?"

You sighed, "say what you want to say Angel."

"I know you love him."

You rolled your eyes, "what makes you say that?"

He smirked, "because of the way you smile at him, I mean, it's cute."

You shook your head, "you are delusional and I suggest you get help. Now I need to set up the sofa bed, you can help or you can wait outside for Manny to arrive."

Angel gave you a look, "am I, or are you just scared that you're going to get hurt. Because I can tell you that you might be surprised."

You huffed, "what does it matter Angel? Yes, I love him, can you fucking drop it now?"

Angel smiled, "alright, I'll drop it. Are you going to let Manny sleep out in your lounge room all on his lonesome?"

You shook your head, "no, I'm a good host. He's going to take my bed and I'm taking the sofa."

You walked off to get the sheets, returning and directing Angel to help you, "that's so nice of you, letting him sleep in your bed."

You glared at him, "I need to get him fresh sheets in there next, now help me or fuck off."

Angel helped, smiling all the while. He glanced around your bedroom and you could see the wheels in his head turning, "what now man?"

He shrugged, "nothing, I just think Manny will get lonely here without you, your bed is pretty big."

You huffed, "he'll have the cats to keep him company." Mercifully, the doorbell rang before Angel could reply, the camera showing Manny had arrived, "oh thank God, you can go now Angel."

Angel shook his head, "call me if you need anything." You opened the door and Manny walked in, Angel looking back one last time before walking away, "use protection kids."

Your eyes went wide and Manny shook his head, "don't encourage him y/n."

You smiled as Angel's bike pulled away, "at least he's not coming back to watch us through the window like a perv."

Mr Butts jumped into Manny's arms, Manny smiling as the cat rubbed up against his face, "I'll show you to the bedroom, I've set it all up for you, there's water and extra pillows so you can chose, I even left out the humidifier in case you don't like dry air, no oils though, they aren't safe for kitties."

Manny smiled, "wow, gold star service. You sure you're alright with sleeping on the pull out?"

"Yep, I'm armed and the alarm is set. I'm going to have a shower in the spare bathroom then head to bed. Wake me up of you need anything."

Manny nodded with yawn, "yeah, it's late. Goodnight y/n."

"Goodnight Emmanuel."

You were already getting breakfast together when Many came into the kitchen, his lean, muscled chest bare and all his tattoos on full display. "Morning, did you sleep well?"

He nodded, "yeah, your bed is really nice."

You smiled, "well you have it for the next however long until this is over. Do you have to go the the Clubhouse today?"

He shook his head, "nope, I spoke to Bishop, we have the whole weekend to ourselves."

You smiled, "I'm not that much fun, you should go out an enjoy yourself."

Manny's eyes wrinkled, "what do you mean you're not that much fun? We have fun together."

You shook your head, "yeah, when we're out and I'm trying, I'm a different person when I'm at home, I'm either going to be in the garden, hanging out with my cats or doing something online."

Manny shook his head, "that sounds fun to me, there's plenty we can do. You've got an Xbox and a TV, we can play some video games. Coco told me you love horror movies, I do too. We can go for a walk or a drive. Really, I like your company."

You smiled, "I don't have many co-op games but I'm sure we can work something out. You really mean that you're alright with just vegging around the house? "He nodded, "alright then, I have to water my plants while breakfast cooks, would you like to help?"

Manny smiled, "hell yeah, can the kitties come?" You shook your head, "they can watch from the sunroom, I'm beginning to think you like my cats more than you like me."

Manny chuckled, "honestly, it's an even split."

"We need to go to the store."

Manny nodded, "alright, what do you need?"

You looked in the fridge, "just food, you got anything in mind?"

Manny smiled, "that salt chicken you keep talking about."

You sighed, "I knew you'd say that. I'll drive."

Manny made a face, "what, you got a problem being in the passenger seat. Do you have control issues Emmanuel?"

Manny had the urge to call you a brat, his brain wandering to other places, "nope, I'm basically your bodyguard, the bodyguard always drives.

You huffed, "well not this time." You got ready and grabbed your keys, waiting for Manny to follow while Lady Midnight sat at the table at the door.

You bent down and pressed a kiss between her fluffy ears, Manny shaking his head, "what a princess."

You laughed, "if you say so."

You waited until he walked by her, her little paw coming out to grab his shirt, "meow."

You smiled, "pay the toll or she won't let you leave."

Manny shook his head, "really?"

You nodded, "yep, you got to kiss her little head or she will climb on your until you do."

Manny pecked her forehead then looked at you, "good enough?"

You nodded, "for now."

Manny got into the passenger seat and looked at you, "I have no room for my legs, and it's broken, I can't move it back."

You sighed, "I can see that, you can drive but no bragging." You tossed him your keys, getting out to swap seats then Manny was turning the car on and heading towards the town centre.

"You really don't need to follow me everywhere, I can look after myself."

Manny huffed, "I'm not talking about this with you anymore. You put yourself at risk for the Club, I got to pay that back and keep you safe."

You shook your head, "your life isn't worth any less than mine, it's insane that you have to put yourself on the line when I can look after myself."

He pulled the car over and turned towards you, "stop, I don't want to hear it anymore. If I didn't want to look after you, I wouldn't be here and I would have said no to Bishop if I didn't like spending time with you. I'm not a child, if I don't want to do something, I'm not going to do it, there were plenty of guys there so it's not like I have to be here."

You shook your head, "Angel.."

He cut you off, "I don't give a shit what Angel did. Now stop it, we're going to have issues if you don't."

"I'm sorry, I'm not really used to having people around for days at a time."

Manny smiled sadly, "no need to apologise Tesoro, I keep saying I like your company so I'm just going to have to hang around until you figure it out, you're a smart woman, I'm sure you'll get there before you get sick of me."

"I don't think I could get sick of you."

Manny smiled, "oh shut up Emmanuel."

He shook his head, "now you're getting it." He started the car up again and you had a sudden flash of thoughts, you knew why you weren't going to get sick of him, did he feel the same way?

"Why are you putting it on now? It's only three."

You smiled, "one, I can't take you seriously while you're squishing a cat belly and two, it takes three hours to cook then it has to rest, I don't know about you but I want to eat at a reasonable time."

Manny chuckled and turned to Sir Fluffernutter, "did you hear that little guy, she can't take you seriously."

"Stop groping my cat and come and help me, we need to coat the chicken in the salt mixture."

Manny squished his fluffy belly one last time before placing him on the floor and washing his hands, "ok, what can I do?"

You pointed to the bowl, "use those big hands of yours and coat the chicken in the crust, while you were playing with the cats I was already seasoning the chicken with lemon and garlic."

"Alright, you gonna help me."

You sighed, "this is fast becoming a bad porno, what's next, our hands touch over the chicken breast then we fuck on the bench?"

Manny pressed his lips together, "something tells me you'd have an issue with the food safety of that situation."

You giggled, "yeah, the kitchen is for cooking, not bonking."

Manny laughed, "bonking? So inappropriate."

You snorted, "oh please, just help with dinner."

Manny smiled, "of course gorgeous, I can't have you going hungry."

You stood there, curst pilled in your hand and shook your head, "you're not being very helpful right now."

Manny bumped you with his hip and showed you his mess covered hands, "I am helping."

You bumped him back, "tell that to the half coated chicken."

He slapped the mixture on the bird, "not anymore."

You pointed to the pile, "that's not covered."

There was a pause and you both collapsed into laughter, "we really need to get this in the oven."

Manny smiled, his face wrinkling with affection, "ok, I'll help."

With the chicken in the oven, you and Manny sat down for some video games while you waited for it to cook, "ok, so I have Stardew Valley and Subnautica with a co-op mod, Terraria and Mario."

Manny smiled, "Stardew Valley all the way."

You were surprised, "wow, I never took you for someone who would be interested in something like that."

Manny gave you a look that you couldn't decipher, "it's nice to have some silliness."

"You ready?" You handed Manny the hammer who looked at the brown shell with glee.

"How hard do I need to hit it?"

You smiled, "it takes me three or four goes with full strength but be careful, if you puncture the skin you'll ruin it."

Manny nodded, "ok, ready?" You nodded, bracing for the bang.

"AH." The shell cracked, "holy shit, that was good, maybe one more in the corner." Manny brought the hammer down and the shell cracked open, a wonderful smell filling the air.

Manny dropped the hammer, smiling while making eye contact and dipped his fingers in the juices, "oh my God that's better than sex."

You cover your face, feeling your body get hot, "what kind of shit sex are you having?"

Manny shook his head, "hey, I'm great in bed, it's just that good."

You sighed, "wait until you taste the actual chicken."

Manny went to grab a knife, "let it rest you heathen, you're worse than the cats."

Right on cue, the meowing started, "speaking of, they need their dinner."

You went to the containers on the bench and dumped them into their bowls, "that's for the cats, I thought it was for us?"

You shook your head, "you want raw fish and beef in a little bowl?"

He shook his head, "I mean, I thought you were going to cook it for us."

You smiled, "no, I take it out of the fridge so it's room temp, it's meant to be as close to their natural diet and I don't think fresh prey is fridge cold."

He laughed as their meows got louder, Mr Butts trying to climb up your pants so he could get to the food. "Excuse me kitty, this is unacceptable."

Manny's laugh grew, "you want help?"

You nodded and pointed to the bowls, "can you please potion out the food, one container per bowl, please. Put one on the bench for Lady Midnight, one under my dining chair for Sir Fluff and one next to the oven is for Mr Butts." Manny rushed off and Mr Butterscotch detached from you to follow him.

"Why do you put them in different places?" The cats started to eat the moment the food was put down.

"So they don't steal each other's food, Lady Midnight is very sweet and she won't fight back so she gets it up high where no one else can get to her. Tomorrow I'm going to show you to teach them how to sit, which they normally do before they eat."

Manny smiled, "you taught them how to sit before you feed them?"

"Yep, they tend to eat slower when they do. Now would you like to start on our dinner?"

"Fuck yeah."

"You ate half a chicken Emmanuel, you're going to get a tummy ache." He wiped his face, seemly ready to fall asleep.

"It was a small chicken and I've never eaten something more delicious." You shook your head and took his plate from him and went to wash it up at the sink.

"I gotta cook tomorrow to thank you, what do you want?"

You thought for a moment, "surprise me." He shook his head with a smile.

"How am I going to do that when I have to go with you everywhere? You'll guess before I even start." It was said with affection, like he was upset that he couldn't surprise you.

"I have free grocery delivery, just use that." He smiled and stood up, walking over to the kitchen to help you clean up.

"Alright, what are you in the mood for then? You have to give me some idea."

You looked him dead in the eye, doing your best not to laugh, "surprise me."

He crossed his arms over his chest and raised his eyebrows, "you are such a brat."

"You know it Emmanuel."

"Ok, so you bought pork, Chinese cabbage, prawns, and green onions and from the supply here you have flour, ginger and garlic, soy sauce and sesame oil. Are you making me pot stickers with homemade wrappers?"

"I shouldn't have let you in the kitchen, you've spoilt the surprise. Also prawns, are you secretly an Australian?

You giggled, "nah, I would have known when I smelt them cooking, they are some of my favourites you know. And no, I'm not secretly an Australian, these have claws and therefore are prawns. Shrimp don't have claws."

"I can't belive you know that, you're a little weird." You smiled and bumped him with your shoulder.

"I'd rather be weird than boring." He gasped in fake offence.

"Are you calling me boring?"

"Hell no, you and a whole bunch of other men ride around on motorbikes wearing matching vests, that's kinda interesting."

He shoved you playfully, his face breaking out into a grin, "for that you're helping me wrap the things."

You sighed, "you are so mean to me, do you know how much time that takes?"

"Yeah, that's why I'm getting you to help me."

The days droned on, Manny seemed most worried when you were at work, sitting outside in a car with one of the others, watching the street like a hawk waiting for the bad guys to show up and storm your office.

"These guys aren't going to hit here, their whole MO is flying under the radar. Hitting a therapist that works will hurt little kids is the opposite." Manny didn't seem to even hear Coco.

"I don't care, I would never forgive myself if something happened to her." his leg bounced as he waited for you to finish your day, smiling as you came out and walked over to them.

"I'm done, and I'm heading home, you really don't need to follow me." Manny gave you a look and you sighed, "just get into the car with me dude and let Coco go home."

He shook his head, "we'll follow you, three heads are better than two." You sighed and walked off, getting into your car in a huff before yelling out your window.

"I'm fine, you don't need to worry about me, you're all being worry warts." The last thing you saw before you sped off was Coco's middle finger at the window.

You were both lying on the pullout, blankets covering your legs with Manny's arm slung over the back on the couch. "What's on the billing tonight?"

"I think we should watch The Conjuring series, I wanna see how long you can last."

He chuckled, "me? I don't scare that easily but I'll protect you from the scary demons."

You snorted, "what are you going got do, wave your arms at them until they run away?"

He gasped in fake offence, "you're asking for trouble now."

You shook your head, "maybe, as I said, I don't find you all that intimidating."

He tilted his head, "you don't do you?"

"Nope, now I'm going to play the movie, unless you want to hide under the covers with the cats?"

Manny lifted Lady Midnight from between you and onto his lap, "nah, I think Mr Butts is all licked out."

You giggled, "don't jinx yourself, he'll be in your face before you can take it back." You clicked on the movie, then stood up, "I'm going to go get us some popcorn, I'll be back in a bit."

He listened as you got out the pot and put the kernels on the stove, "you want me to pause this?"

"Nah, I've seen it before, I'll be back in before it gets good." Sure enough, you return before anything serious happened and handed the bowl to Manny, "this kittens can't have any, butter isn't good for them.

"More for me then." He took a handful and ate them in one go.

"Dude slow down."

He shrugged, "what, this is the best popcorn I"ve ever had."

You shook your head, "it's made with the same flavour they use at the movies, it's not the best for you but it's the only way to get that taste."

"Good to know, are you sure the cats can't have any because Sir Fluff is drooling on my leg." You lifted the blankets and looked at the cat.

"That's because he's asleep, sorry about that."

Manny shook his head, "nah it's alright, he's just happy."

"You say that now but he's not going to move until you make him and your leg is going to fall asleep."

"It's no big deal, I like the little guy. Now can we watch the movie? I wanna see what happens."

"Yeah, we can watch the movie."

As the night went on you and Manny got closer, by the time the second movie wound down, you pressed against him while his hand rubbed up and down your upper arm warmly.

You blinked and rubbed your eyes, "I'm going to brush my teeth, I'll be back." It was almost like he didn't want to let you go.

"We can call it a night if you want?"

You shook your head, "nah, just pause this, I don't want to miss anything, then we can put on the third one, it's not that late." He clicked the movie into pause and you got up, returning a few minutes later before resuming your previous position, Manny not think twice about putting his hand back on your arm.

"We should go somewhere tomorrow."

You smiled, "why, are you getting board of me?"

He shook his head, "no, I just don't want you to feel trapped in the house because I'm here, Coco told me you usually go to the gardens on the weekend and you missed out last week."

You smiled, "I'd like that, I've been enough that I get can get us both a free lunch."

That seemed to make him happy, "I can't wait, what there's anyway?"

You sighed, "it's a mix, the stuff outside is all from around here but it's the flowering season which means it's all really pretty and they have a heap of rare stuff inside. I think you'll like it. The best thing is there's no one there right now because they haven't gotten anything new in a while."

"Sounds fun, I just realised that even though I've been here for almost a year I haven't really seen the sights."

You reached across him and stroked one of the cats on the head, "well, I think I"m going to have plenty of time to show you. It has been a week, if nothing's happened by now, it's not going to happen but we both know the Club won't let you leave me alone until it's sorted."

"I'm alright with that. Plus I've gotten used to the company."

You smiled, "yeah, it's nice to have someone over for more than just a meal." You yawned and shifted and Manny lifted his hand from you but you raised your hand in protest.

"I can head to bed if you want?"

You shook your head, "you don't need to go unless you want to, I'm not going to fall asleep no matter how comfortable you are."

He chuckled "alright then." He smiled softly to himself and you pulled the blanket up to your chest. Before too long, he noticed you weren't paying much attention to the TV, your eyes staying closed longer each time you blinked. Manny thought about getting up and heading to his own bed but that would mean moving and he didn't have the heart to wake you up and if he was being honest with himself, he didn't want to move either.

By the time his own eyes started to get heavy, getting up and sleeping in his own bed was the last thing on his mind.

Manny felt a weight on his chest when he woke up that didn't really feel like the cats. When he lifted his hand off his stomach and reached out, his fingers met your skin and his eyes shot open, he had fallen asleep on the pullout with you next to you.

One of the first things he noticed was how much his back hurt and he felt a pang of guilt that you had been sleeping here for a week just for his comfort but before he could think more you lifted your hand and rubbed your face with a groan.

"Morning."

He smiled, "morning y/n."

You blinked the sleep out of your eyes and sat up "morning, sorry if I trapped you here last night."

He shook his head, "nah, I didn't want to wake the cats up so I slept here, this thing is very uncomfortable."

You swung your legs over the bed and stood up, stretching with a grumble, "it's not that bad."

He huffed, "yes it is, and I'm pretty pissed that you're sleeping on it when this is your house and I'm imposing on you."

You shook your head, "it's fine really. What do you want for breakfast?"

He pushed the cat off his chest and got up, "you're not going to do anything, I'm making us waffles."

You realised there was no point in protesting so you got up to start the day while Manny headed to the kitchen. It didn't take you long to get dressed, coming out the Manny mixing the batter with one hand while the cats demanded he pat them with the other.

"I need to feed them, are you right to keep cooking?"

He nodded, "yeah, when I said I was going to make us breakfast, I meant it. Plus if you don't feed them I think they are going to eat us."

You fed the cats while Manny finished the waffle, a big smile on his face as he put the plate down in front of you, "I put some chocolate sauce in the middle of yours."

"Thank you Manny, did you put anything in yours?"

He nodded, "yep, you had that fancy jam and I thought it would be nice."

"The tomato and onion one? How about we got halves because that sounds good too?"

He smiled and cut his in half before taking the plate from you and doing the same to yours, "I was hoping you'd ask me for that."

You shook your head, "you could have just made a few mini one, I wouldn't have judged you."

He huffed, "why would I do that when I know you were going to share with me."

"Well Manny, you better eat up because we are going to have a blast today and you're going to want to have a full belly.

"This is a Palo verde tree which is a fascinating tree because it photosynthesis through its bark as well as its leaves and because of its branch layout, it's great if you need shade in a pinch."

Manny smiled, "that's so cool, what about this one?" He pointed to one with tall with flowers and flat spikey leaves.

"That's a Yucca, their whole lives rely on the Yucca moth, the moths pollinate the flower and the moth's egg incubates in the blossoms. without one the other would go extinct."

"That's so fucking cool. I want to go inside, you have so much more to show me." You walked inside, your hand brushing Manny's as you walked. As much as you wanted to link your hand in his but there was something telling you that it wouldn't go over well. Manny walked right to the first plant he saw, "it says there are only forty of these in the wild."

You nodded, "yep, the Parsley Fern, they have to fly in the soil for the volcano where they grow."

He leaned in and had a good look before something caught his eye on the other side of the room, before he could think he grabbed your wrist to take you there and you followed him as his feet traced towards it.

"This looks like a fuzzy animal." You didn't let go of his hand as you pointed to the sign.

"It's called a Vegetable Sheep, also very rare. Can I have my hand back please?" His eyes went wide and he dropped your wrist.

"Sorry."

You shook your head, "it's alright. Honestly it's kind of cute, you were excited."

He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the edges, "you're really cool you know that?"

You held back on hiding your face from embarrassment, "you're pretty cool too. I mean, most people would think this kind of thing is super boring."

He shook his head, "nope, not me."

You walked around the building until you saw everything there was to see, Manny taking photos when he saw something he really liked. You rushed through lunch so you could get the most out of your day, finishing just as the sun set.

You walked outside and were hit with the cool air, taking a deep breath as you made your way back to the car. "Did you have fun today?"

He nodded, "hell yeah, I'm wondering what we're going to do tomorrow?"

You thought for a minute, "we could go see these flowers out in the wild?"

His smile grew, "that would be great, can we go camping too?"

You shook your head, "over my dead body, we can look at the stars and come home a bit late if that's what you want but there's no way I'm sleep in a tent."

He chuckled, "done, a hike and then stargazing. Someone should have threatened your life months ago, I've had more fun in the last week than I have in months."

"You really mean that, I mean, even when we haven't been doing anything much?"

"Yep." Something had the hairs on the back of your neck standing up, you were about two minutes from the car and you suddenly felt the need to get moving.

Manny seemed to noticed that something was wrong, "I think we're being followed."

"Me too, we need to get back to the car now." You pulled your phone out, switched the find my phone on and texted Coco, "I'm going to call you, we're being followed, don't talk, just stay on the line." You waited a few moments, dialled, breathing out as he picked up then slid the phone into your pocket.

Looking behind you only served to prove your theory, there was a black van behind you, following you up the road. Your hand moved to your hip, hovering over your gun while Manny's hand wrapped around your upper arm, "we need to go now." In a flash Manny was pulling you along, his long legs causing you to run as he tried to close the distance to your car.

The gunshot had you jumping and it was clear that there was no way you were going to make it to your car. Manny pulled you down the street as the van stopped and they got out.

"There." You pointed to an alleyway where you could hide and Manny's leg went without question. You got there and you both ducked behind a dumpster.

You took a few seconds to catch your breath, "I say we take that street there and go around the block, I think there were only three of them, if we play our cards right, they should miss us." You pulled your gun out and waited, looking to Manny for his ok.

He nodded towards you and you took a deep breath, the opening to the street was only a few feet away, it would take less than a minute to get there. Manny nodded at you and you shot up but it was too late and you heard a click behind you, "hello little bird, we found you."

Your hand tighten around your gun, you only hoped the others were on their way. "Don't you dare, take his too." You dropped the gun and reach over to Manny, taking his from his hand.

"Get up." The gun in your face made it clear that you didn't have a choice. The other two got Manny under control while you stared down the man with the gun.

You stood up slowly, Manny following suit, "you're gonna die right here on the street. Maybe your friends will find you before the stray dogs get to you."

You could see the rage on Manny's face, but you shook your head ever so slightly when you saw he was going to do something, "what will it take for you to let us live? I know all about the Club, I'll tell you everything if you let us go."

The man smiled, "I'll get you live, not him."

Manny looked at you, you were planning something and he could tell.

"Alright, what do you want to know?"

He smiled, "when's is the Clubhouse most vulnerable?"

You blinked, "Saturday mornings, everyone's drunk and fucked out, no one is paying attention."

Manny tried to stop himself from smiling, you were lying. Sure there were people hungover everywhere but a full Clubhouse was anything but vulnerable, "where do they keep the guns?"

You paused for effect, "in one of the back rooms, if you use the back entrance they'll never get to them especially if they're the temple where there are no guns at all."

You did your best not to flinch as one of them stuck Manny, "how many men stand guard?"

You swallowed, "only one, by the door, most of the front gate is left unprotected and the roof isn't high enough for people to be able to see over it."

The leader smiled, "well, I'm a man of my word. You can go now."

You shook your head, "please, let us both go. He never did anything to you, please."

Manny was taken aback at the desperation in your voice. He looked over at you one last time and realised that you were slowly lowering one finger at a time on your right hand. One of the men standing behind Manny brought the butt of the gun down on his back, "any last words shithead?"

Manny swallowed, "yeah." He turned to you fully, his eyes watching as you dropped a fourth finger. His face was hard, he was ready to die knowing that you would get away, he only hoped that the other Mayans were close enough that they would be able to keep you safe if these men changed their minds, "I just want you to know, that I l……"

BANG

"Guys we have to do now." Coco was filled with fear as he ran over to Bishop. 

"What is it man?" 

Coco held the phone up and put a single finger to his mouth, they could hear you talking to Manny, "they went to the gardens today, didn't they?" 

Coco nodded, "yep and her phone says they're still there, if they don't take it off her we might be able to find them. If we go now you might get there in time." 

They all raced off, dodging the cars as they broke the speed limit. They arrived at the gardens far soon than they thought, jumping off their bikes as Coco rechecked his phone. He could hear talking, your voice calm but laced with fear, "back rooms, if you use the back entrance they'll never."

They spread out and moved slowly, hoping that you and Manny were still nearby, "the GPS says y/n's phone is close." Gilly pointed to an alleyway and they all converged, moving to form a line as Coco pointed them onward. 

They could hear voices now and they knew with a few more steps, they would be on top of them. Angel's breath stopped as he caught the sight of you and Manny on your knees, the man behind Manny cracking the butt of his gun into Manny's back.  

"Any last words shithead?"

Angel looked to his side as the other men came closer, their plan forming silently as Manny turned to you "I just want you to know, that I l......"

BANG

Part 5

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[aranarumei]

hi kiri I intend to make you type so many words. for our ask game I’m starting with xicheng because I have my share of opinions

ask me about a ship and I'll give my opinions + classify them as does / doesn't make sense, does / doesn't compel me oh boy. my askbox has never been this full you guys…! really fun all of you tho. some I’ve got thoughts on some I haven’t really considered etc. and very impressively: no dupes!

also. words have been written. to the point that I’m putting this under a readmore lmao. up top apology for the incoherence i do just ramble

sooo xicheng. until recently I did not know the ao3 stats for this ship were. that big? don't feel like dangling the classification like bait so I'll start by saying: doesn’t make sense, doesn't compel me. now I will take way too many words to explain exactly why I feel that way!

as a person I am first and foremost a jiang cheng x happiness shipper. kind of. I never want it to be easy for him. because I’m kind of a bastard. so I've actually read a bit of fic with jc in a few different ships, some of which have been xicheng. and there's like, a few of those fics that have portrayed as aspect of jiang cheng like... so sensitively and in a way that made me Feel Things. so I'll always love them for that. my issue is that I just feel like... in the case of these, lan xichen could often be anyone for me. i read mdzs like... pre-untamed, and lan xichen's like... idk. I liked his role in the story but he didn't super compel me? so some of my issues with xicheng stem from the fact that I've simply never thought about lan xichen that much, and I'm not really invested in exploring his character. I think they could have some compelling things because they have a variety of things on their ends that don't get fully resolved, by pure virtue of 1) existing in mdzs 2) being side characters. also if jiang cheng's visiting gusu lan it puts him in proximity of wei wuxian which does promise for interesting interactions. what sours me on xicheng is... like I've said, I think some fics can make it work enough for me. but I feel like a large motivator of the fic is just... "oh look, wei wuxian's got a brother, and so does lan wangji! let's ship them!" even though they're totally different people? and as a consequence these two tend to get sanded down into often reductive portrayals. lot of pair the spares energy.

also kind of on the subject... I think I just don't really like.... ships with jiang cheng? in general? well my tolerance actually varies but I think especially when they take place post-canon (which the xicheng I've read often does) it doesn't sit right with me. I think it’s because jiang cheng’s not in… dire straits post-canon, but he’s not really happy. like he got told about the golden core thing but he’s unable to say the thing back about why he ran off like that in the first place. and I don’t like post-canon ships where it’s like. oh… jiang cheng, you poor thing. you shall be fixed by love. so I think I’m softer on ships that deal with things that happen before everything goes to shit for this reason. like I’ve not watched a lot of the show, but him and wen qing could be fun especially since that makes the golden core thing way more fucked up. with sangcheng they were like. friends in canon and stuff and then it seems they’ve gotten more distant. with zhancheng I mean like. there’s that tension and those years where wei wuxian wasn’t around and they were carrying their separate griefs. but with xicheng I feel like they don’t have anything super interesting in canon, which makes their outsized popularity a bit startling to me.

this is like. deeply personal and is kind of petty but. as someone who has wandered into the jiang cheng tags a couple times. man. people really hate that guy. and also hate people who like him. at least the couple times I looked there was just a lot of stuff arguing about like. oh jiang cheng sucks actually he’s the worst and all his fans are delusional for liking him and they’re ignoring his Crimes. he’s a uniquely selfish character who is unable to express or feel love. I’m not saying this is everyone, it’s just… the vibe I got from quite a few posts. this was also years ago. maybe things are calmer. I’m definitely biased because jiang cheng has always been my favorite character, so of course I love him. but this isn’t a defense post of him. either you like him or you don’t. just don’t bother me. anyways, the thing about “love” has always stuck with me, because I think that jiang cheng so obviously expresses love. like… the entire way he feels about wei wuxian! that’s his brother! idk. if you can’t see that you’ve lost me. now do I think jiang cheng communicates any of his feelings well ever No.

but about the love thing. when I read romantic fics involving jiang cheng post-canon, intentionally or not, a lot of what I read had this angle of almost like… look how capable of love jiang cheng is. and I’m like. well jiang cheng already loves people. it may not have gone perfectly or been so beautiful but that doesn’t make it non-existent. if he loves selfishly or awkwardly or without communicating it, it doesn’t mean that the love doesn’t exist. I think I’m stumbling into incoherence here… but my favorite headcanon for jiang cheng is probably one where he’s aromantic and asexual, because to me it affirms this feeling of like. romantic love is not some kind of absolution. and the “love” that he feels isn’t any lesser than whatever romance is going around. many different ways to be aroace ofc but this is how I see it for him. a lot of this is probably also influenced by the fact that I’m writing a fic with aroace jiang cheng at this present moment haha. as you might imagine, having this headcanon means that I tend to be neutral on most jiang cheng ships! I think to really grab me you’d have to make it interesting on the other end, so the character’s not just a sounding board for jiang cheng’s issues and vice versa, which sort of sums up my problems with xicheng. even the xicheng fics I read and liked were like… great, I’m glad you’re treating these two like real characters and not wangxian to the left. however a lot of this fic is just like. wow jiang cheng / lan xichen you’ve had it hard. Here’s a character who will comfort you and support you. and that’s nice in a way, but not compelling as a ship, yknow? so that’s the sum up of my thoughts. I’m on the scale of neutral-dislike, but if there’s a particularly good portrayal of jiang cheng I’d probably read it.

[thehighpriestess1]

Where do l even begin we have so much to go over!

First off I TOTALLY KNEW THAT SNEAK PEEK WAS A DREAM I DEFINITELY WASNT IN SHAMBLES 🤧 I’m hoping this dream isn’t a premonition if what’s to come.

Their argument, as soon as Satoru said "as a mother," I did a facepalm and knew he was about to say some fucked up shit. He definitely dropped the ball and didn't have to come at Y/N like that, only for him to ignore her after? I'm so glad Jerry put him in his place holy shit. He has his demons, they both do but... is he really surprised? His unfortunate childhood was the cause of his but he's the cause of Y/N's trauma. Especially when he punished her for it exactly the same way he did when he chose Utahime? Ghosting her while she sat there, waiting for him to choose her after placing trust in their relationship. My heart really broke for our girl and I’m glad that she at least had Jerry to advocate for her. Y/N is out of her element and has all the odds against her living in his estate since no one but Jerry could talk to Gojo like that and get away with it. BEST NANNY AND ID DIE FOR JERRY! He’s the real MVP of the chapter tbh.

His father is a piece of work, if the work in question acted and smelled like shit. When Satoru realized after Y/N was unknowingly repeating words his mother probably told his father I could see it really broke him. At that moment he probably felt like his father and while we know Gojo is nothing like that man, the thought of becoming his father probably terrifies him to pieces. I wonder why Gojo’s mother left without him, I’m sure his father would’ve been much more upset since his heir would’ve been taken from him if she took him but I wonder if Gojo looks at it like abandonment or if he understood why she did what she did and didn’t blame her for it. Children are more observant than we give them credit for and they know when things aren’t going well so I wonder how kid Gojo saw the entire thing. We really only got Jerry’s interpretation of the events since Gojo doesn’t talk about it. I hope he does, maybe it’d help if he opened up to Y/N more.

Satoru showing his jealous side had me giggling like he was pretty fucked up for sending that guy overseas just because he got jealous but I just know he looked hot doing it, so 🤭 (I'm ignoring the fact it's a huge red flag that he gets annoyed and jealous when Y/N interacts with any man that's not him or Jerry)

Now Yuri.. one thing about roaches is they don't fuck off and are always around when they're not wanted. This entire situation is so messy, Satoru was an idiot for letting her get that close but can we really blame him? I hate to say it but she seemed to make him feel a bit better when Y/N was presumed She even stopped one of his attempts. I really wonder how Satoru is going to fix this because she seems REALLY confident in her ability to hurt Y/N and Keisuke. Maybe there's a rat amongst them that helps her out? I feel like her texts are pretty damning evidence that she made it up but is the trust that's currently between Y/N and Satoru gonna be enough for her to believe him? Knowing Satoru, he probably won’t show her anything and try keeping her as far away from everything as he can. I’m hoping he learned his mistakes about hiding everything from Y/N because look what that got them last time! But maybe it’s not that simple, knowing that bitch Yuri it won’t be. Is Yuri so delusional that she genuinely things she'll have her happily ever after if she separates them ESPECIALLY AFTER THREATENING HIS SON? I hope she gets what's coming to her but I know she wouldn’t act out her plan without thinking it through. It seems like her goal now is more like just getting rid of Y/N completely and not just trying to get Satoru, which i’m sure she still wants, but it seems she’s more driven by her hatred of Y/N more than anything. This truly seems like a test about the strength of Gojo and Y/N’s relationship more than anything. Their growth as both people and as partners will truly be tested.

Can Y/N and Gojo just fuck without Naoya, Hiro and Yuri plotting some ominous villain type shit texts after? LEAVE THEM ALONE (the smut was so GOOD, I love the fact he worshipped her body, it's been about 3 months and I know that people don't always bounce back so it was just really nice to see some post partum body worship) You already know Gojo made up for their year apart that entire day, the both of them were STRESSED 🤭

I adore their domestic scenes, I love that during the previous chapters, Y/N seemed wary to make plans too far into the future with Gojo because she didn't even know if she was going to stay with him. Now she agreed to another kid with him if Keisuke ended up being a Daddy's boy. I sincerely hope they all make it to see the results of this bet. They’ve been through so much they’re due an early retirement at this point. But knowing August nothing is that simple. 🤭 Y/N also openly acknowledging Gojo as her husband and wearing the clothes he got her? I just know he was screaming and jumping for joy on the inside. All that’s left is the ring 😭

What I do know, is that Gojo would rather die than lose Y/N. I can’t imagine he’d comply with Yuri’s demands and he’d gladly lay his life on the line to protect his family. Maybe that’s how it’ll go, if they do a family photo shoot or if Y/N gets pregnant again after their day long session and those will be the only things she gets from Gojo at the end 😭 oh I’m making myself sad as if that’s what’s gonna happen but I don’t even know LOL

I feel like I probably missed something but my essay has gotten long enough! Thank you again for writing this fic and for sharing your work with us. I hope that you’re doing well and I can’t wait for the following update, the REAL finale! You truly know how to write a story ❤️🥰

Gojo went really mad when he implied that y/n was not a good mother. He is just too protective of her and Keisuke but he needs to learn to trust her. JERRY IS THE MVP!!!!! He had seen this film before and he was hell bent on changing the outcome this time!!

Gojo really had a panic attack when he heard y/n say those words and that's when his actions dawned on him. He realised that HE could hurt y/n if he wasn't careful and that's the last thing he wanted.

Gojo's mother left him because she knew she could not take him with her and she had to choose between protecting her unborn child or staying at the estate and she felt since she couldn't save Satoru he was going to save the other one. Somewhere because of that Gojo has abandonment issues and that reflects in his toxic jealousy. He cannot imagine y/n choosing any other man over him so he removes the "obstacles" himself. Total red flag but a hot red flag.

Gojo was never happy without y/n. Yuri distracted him with alcohol and drugs and just her presence. She did petty work for him and she did save his life which is why she thinks he owes his life to her. Since according to her y/n took his life and she saved it. She has worked with Gojo for a year and she knows the in and out of the business. She wouldn't just threaten Gojo without holding all the good cards. She knows Gojo's weaknesses and triggers very well and she is not afraid to use them. She knows there are trust issues and things are complicated because of Keisuke. But losing y/n would kill Gojo.

They needed that time together and they are opening up to each other physically and emotionally. Y/n acknowledging Gojo as her husband was the biggest confident boost and you'll see in the next part what he does about it ;) Sometimes dreams are premonitions.... sometimes they are just dreams ;)

[yuukei-yikes]

Ok after your whole “shintaro misogyny” “shinaya?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??????!,!,?,?,?,?,?,,,” rant (loved btw, Jin stop making ur female characters rely on male counterparts, stop making your male characters hate women or believe they are incapable challenge), how do you feel about Kanoshin. I know you have talked about it before but like, idk, talk about it again lol.

Kano “I can fix him” Shuuya? Or Kano “I can make him worse” Shuuya.

JQKEOEKDWODIEID MY WHOLE "SHINTARO MISOGYNY" AND "SHINAYA?!?!?!?!?" thats so funny i didnt MEAN for it to be a rant. i was just venting 💔 BUT THANK U FOR LOVING IT BC I FUCKING LOVE TALKING ABOUT THAT BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY BOTTLED UP FEELINGS.

man. kanoshin. i dont think they're an i can fix him or i can make him worse duo. i dont think they are together FOR each other, they're together for their personal gratification if that makes sense??? at least that's how it starts. like they rly feed off of each other's worst coping mechanisms and validate themselves thru that. but through doing this obviously cant help to get to know each other and shintaro is pathetically laughing at kano's jokes and kano is pathetically kicking his feet and twirling his hair at shintaro groaning pathetically on the ground abt god knows what (NEVER forget this novel 7 moment)

also its so funny how often in the novels shintaro just physically throws himself on the ground to start moaning and groaning whenever he gets embarrassed. he's such a fucking freak. like who the fuck does that

shintaro and kano in the seventh novel are so insanely gay it's SO fucking good. THE BIT WHERE SHINTARO SMILES AT KANO AND KANO'S LIKE HUH...THAT'S HOW HE USED TO SMILE AT AYANO... HE ALWAYS HAD THIS SPECIAL SMILE FOR HER, AND NOW HE'S SMILING JUST LIKE THAT TO ME... like GIRLLLL *EXPLODES THEM WITH MY MIND* there is seriously no heterosexual explanation for any of that. god the seventh novel is so so so good. all of them are so good i wonder why it's the least consumed kagepro media they're SUPERIOR. the novels my #1 forever i fucking love them.

anyways. im normal erm kanoshin hehehehehehehhehe i think they're both far too terrified and disgusted abt their feelings for each other to consider stuff like "i can fix him" or "i can make him worse" YOU GET WHAT IM SAYING??? on this subject specifically, shintaros self hatred comes from well everything bitch hates himself but if we're talking abt kanoshin. 1. its ayanos brother. even if we dont even look at shinaya ever being romantically involved in the first place, THIS IS WEIRD TO HIM. 2. internalized homophobia arc☝️☝️☝️🙏🙏🙏👍👍👍👍💯💯💯

the fic i drew fanart of a couple days ago is SO *EATS IT EATS IT EATS IT* or also a soulmate au that i havent read in aaaages and also never finished but in that one shintaro was already out as bi... sadly both are aus WHICH DOESNT make them bad, aus are awesome but the things I'd do for content like that set post str. please. *bite bite bite bite bite* srry i bring these fics up cuz hehehe internalized homophobia shintaro is so good

maybe kano would eventually set for i can make him worse but it's in an attempt of scaring shintaro away. he's like im gonna self sabotage so much to make sure he stays away from me but shintaro is STILL here looking pathetic and kano's like god DAMMIT. erm. yeah.

btw now for me being crazy (tw me using shintaro as a stress toy to make me laugh): i think post str shintaro is not AS BAD with being absolutely fucking insufferable abt his whole guys rule girls drool thing because my man's had a little time to grow (ignores shinaya chapter in the eighth novel so i don't go insane with anger). i think post str shintaro makes 1 sexist comment and the entire mekakushi dan just fucking freeze for a moment. and give him an intervention and force him to say im sorry women and ever since then is more mindful of his actions. sorry i have to be delusional and believe this or else I'd just fucking hate his ass. im sorry shinaya i love you but *burns novel 8 shinaya chapter*

shintaro's messy relationships post str is my favorite stress toy btw. relationship with ayano crumbles. starts WHATEVER THAT IS with kano. in the self hatred confusion and internalized homophobia and etc the situation causes him (situation being gf dumped me bc im selfish so i hate myself / i kissed a boy a couple times so i hate myself) he desperately turns to the next closest Female(?) Counterpart with the following thought process "Pfff well i am so straight and SO capable of holding a normal relationship and i can PROVE IT there is one person who is 1. girl enough 2. apparently okay with me being a selfish asshole and consuming all their energy with my bullshit". so the solution is obvious to shintaro. just date takane.

turns out hitting on your best friend who also happens to be ur other best friend's gf is not good for either one of these relationships. so his friendship with not only takane but also haruka crumbles too in response and its so awkward. takane bc 1. i dont feel this way abt you and I'd treat the situation sensibly if i didnt know you well enough to know you dont actually like me that way and ur just taking me for granted like youve been doing all this time which WAS pissing me off and on its way to eventually explode but THIS....??? and haruka 2. YOU JUST HIT ON MY GIRLFRIEND?? (shintaro would be like maaan why did you tell haruka. and harutaka are like *slam door on his face*) situation drives shintaro to possibly end up kissing kano again. 🤨

its so hilarious. to me at least. ITS FINE he will get over it and makeup with everyone but i like making him suffer 👍 this is what you get shintaro. What do you have to say to the women in the world. apologize. say im sorry women. say it. say it and I'll leave you alone. sorry i went a little crazy in the end

[the-firebird69]

Ethnic minorities abroad Mongolian national customs Ethnic minorities

We don't have the main computer programming keeps saying people keep looking he would be naturally hiding it and all this other mumbo jumbo I'm saying and he doesn't give a s*** I'm a stupid person and he knows I'm stupid it makes us having the program a joke and we do understand that but we don't have the main one he says that's in Saturn and he escapes with it did it to you on purpose cuz you like this s*** heads I agree too we'd be running around telling people like we are now the smart thing to do it's a really devious system he made and nobody would have thought of it for the real that was Insanity back then and it was just a 20 years ago or something 15 and he left or his computer didn't he's here and that's another thing he says we have a knockoff but it's got in beds in it all over the place and it's meant to be tied into but not by the mainframe I don't know what the hell to do with all this information but he knows how it goes that's the basic outline of what real programmers to at the minimum and we're running around telling people all our secrets because we think we have this master AI and we think we keep getting out of trouble and if you people are telling us our brains are getting blown out and we can't resist saying it's not because we don't have proof and he says it's proof in your head all those lines and I did check and it doesn't look good we have to calm down with it but he says it's not that bad what I'm doing assistant bothering me about stuff because you think you're invincible with ratting on everybody cuz you're stupid and you're delusional really you're way out there and mentally ill we're starting to see something we're rubbing him the wrong way constantly and a lot of other people it doesn't matter is there's people are right here next to us I get to wake up call today and someone called us Jesus I said you don't get what it is and your Jesus for the money and information and we're feeding it to the people cuz like he did but this is supposed to be for the money and it didn't work that well and sending information out is causing fighting but it doesn't do what we need and I do hear that this guy he won't back off is Trump and he's a miserable piece of s*** who says we're winning I know his advertising that the thing is up there he won't stop doing this stupid s*** now we're doomed

Sarah

True too Trump won't shut his mouth he's an idiot and he's doomed them

Thor Freya

You're damned Sarah you should understand it you can't talk about this stuff even if other people knew and you keep blabbing and you two are idiots you get shot all the time and your whole clan has to die cuz they keep having to do this dumb s*** it's ridiculously stupid and sitting here on my house and you f****** freak

Hera

We all think you can fix it it's stupid and can't fix his own life he has no money and we're doing all this dumb s*** I can't believe it's it's how bad we've gotten this clan was running the Earth we did much better and now he suck kind of turned on them there's nothing really to say we're doing the job by walking around is them and they hate that too and probably going to execute us they're saying they definitely will

Sarah

We are definitely going to execute you you are definitely going to die it's not his fault and he's saying that sacrifice the fleet to be and say that we're gaining some but not all of it it's ridiculous we're going to get out of this and it's you stupid f****** s*** is here he didn't tell me you're telling me stuff give me free information all over the place now they're telling me about these huge diamonds like b****** and really their program is not that great and you're right James is up there and we're wondering what the hell is up to and as well as small and is a mental patient and you were right the whole time

Macs

There's only so much that will fit in that teeny little head of his and yeah he's a pinhead and he's a moron and he's delusional and he's a mental patient he doesn't belong doing anything and for some reason people are believing him and he's just a huge rat and it's not working out for the empire or anyone else this guy is a big piece of s***

Mac daddy

Olympus

[get-shiggy-with-it]

collab masterlist

✧ pairing: villain!hawks x afab!reader

✧ word count: 5k

✧ warnings: this is like all smut, angst, ambiguous but happy ending, unhealthy relationships, mentions of transactional sex, reader has a healing quirk but it's really just for poetic purposes, reader has a vagina, no other gendered parts, oral sex (reader receiving), vague metaphorical drug reference, mentions of blood, mentions of wounds, mating press, soft sex (?), sorta, slight potential could be read as dubcon but they're both into it

✧ summary: for years you've stitched hawks back together when the world has torn him to shreds—and he always pays you back, though you can't help but start want more than he can give you.

✧ a/n: hey y'all this months theme was villain/hero swap with a shared opener! please go check out all the other wonderful works in this collab, there are so many talented writers/artists involved!! credit to @/lady-bakuhoe for the amazing intro. also bonus points if you catch the old aesthetic tumblr post references.

Breaking news: We have yet another report to add to the slew of attacks this month, this comes just days after we broadcast rumours of villains running rampant over the city. This spate of attacks has put the entire metropolitan area at a standstill, road closures and damaged property making it difficult for commuters to get to work in the morning. Road maintenance endeavour to do its best to keep the city running, but it seems futile when these attacks continue to increase. The entire city was brought to a standstill by the mysterious villain who has still not been named, but reports show they are nothing like we have ever experienced before.

Where are the heroes now? Who will save us from the terror overwhelming our city?

Every day the crime toll continues to rise and we have no one here to protect us. The Hero Public Safety Commission assured us earlier in the week that the crime rate would go down, that the top Heroes are out there protecting our city, but if so, where are they? Is it really safe to go out anymore, who can we trust? Would you put your life in the hands of a Hero today? When they have proved our streets are no longer safe. We still have no information on what is going on, or who is involved but we must remain observant. We will continue to report the latest news as we receive it, but for now, we must implore you to heed the warnings of the city-wide curfew that is soon to be implemented. If anyone has any information on these occurrences in the city please send them to us or contact the police, you can remain anonymous. The safety of our citizens is what is most important, stay vigilant and don’t go out unless it is absolutely necessary.

One thing we know for sure: we can no longer rely on Heroes to protect us. The streets of our once-great city are no longer safe, we are no longer safe.

***

You can only touch him when he’s dying.

That fact is made even more horrifically apparent as he stumbles through your open window—and how long has it been since you’ve slept with it closed?—dripping with blood and panting from his flight.

The T.V. blares in the background, filling your tiny apartment with incessant ramblings that only grow louder by the day, and you already know what they’re going to say before they say it. Because you see him, before the reporters stumble upon heroes in the wreckage—you see what they do to him before they’re warning the public of dangerous villains loose in the streets.

They spout off about failing heroes but you think they’ve done a pretty damn good butchers job. Red feathers matted together, sticky and brown, fall in tufts from his back. You burn with shameful jealousy at the thought of those who would call themselves heroes having laid hands on what is yours.

He isn’t really yours and you know that, though you often wish you could be a bit more delusional. It might not hurt so much then.

They call him a villain. They call him a threat to society.

But even faced with the truth spilling from him and onto your creaking floors, it is easy to forget what a ruthless predator the man before you becomes when he leaves these four walls.

Especially as he falls forward on heavy feet straight into your arms, outstretched and waiting. There are stains on your shirt but you’ve known the secret for getting blood out of clothing for years now. Cold water for the fabric, warm to wash away the grime on his lovely skin.

“Gonna need you to fix me up again, sweetheart,” Hawks mumbles into your shoulder where his forehead rests.

His breathing is even more ragged now, not just from the flight.

“I know,” you reply and your hands shake when they find the gaping wound at his side—wide and deeper than the ones before. “I know. Can you walk?”

He doesn’t respond but that mop of golden hair shifts a bit as he slings an arm over your shoulder and rests his weight. You don’t need to direct him to your bedroom. This is an old game you’re playing and he knows the steps.

So do you.

Though, you’re never sure if it's dread that fills you and makes your stomach knot and your knees weak. Or if it’s that awful, momentary rush of excitement at the prospect of being able to run your fingers over him, bare and giving you free reign.

As long as he’s bleeding out on your floor.

Then you can feel him.

When he’s dying and needs you.

Needs you to fix him.

But won’t ever let you close enough to finish the job the way you want to.

You comfort yourself in with the knowledge that at least he lets you this close. At least those thin, silver-skin scars are the unmistakable mark of your healing hands. At least you’ll always haunt him like the red feather down that sticks to your pillows or between your floorboards.

So you strip him carefully and try not to let his sculpted chest distract you from the work. Hawks is silent, such a model patient as always. Only grunting when your fingers move to knit together the ragged edges of his flesh.

This will leave a nasty mark, you know it already. But you can’t find it in yourself to mourn the loss of that lovely skin.

It will only make it harder for him to forget you.

You’re knelt beside him, laid out on a towel you keep at the edge of the bed. Blood will soak through to the sheets regardless, but you try your best. He takes a sharp breath, white teeth catching the back of his hand between them to stifle groans.

You wish there was more pleasure to it. That he was biting back moans for you instead of trying not to scream as his flesh pulsed and grew hot while it was rebuilt under your fingertips. So you indulge, pretend your hands are elsewhere, roaming his perfect waistline and pulling whimpers from him.

Your dangerous, villainous, predator Hawks sprawled on his back, wings spread and cumming onto his chest under you.

The sounds above you change, and you know it hurts—must be excruciating as bone is set back into place—but you chose to believe it’s because he’s trying to keep himself from screaming your name as he reaches his release.

Hawks, you’d croon to him—Hawks because you don’t know his real name. Don’t know who he was before he started this underground life of crime on the fringes of a society that called him a monster and then turned him into one.

He isn’t a monster in your bed, though he may cry like one.

Cry as you mold his flesh and try not to look him in the face. Try to pretend they are an overflow of some better emotion. And when those summer wheat field eyes roll back in his head and those horrible pretty noises stop, you push past the growing ache in your limbs until the skin under your palms is smooth and no longer leaking thick, red blood.

And you do your best to resist the itch to feel more of him while he can’t stop you. Even with your fingers numb from overexertion, you can’t help but fall back on your heels and long for the feeling of his cheek in your hand, or his chest on your face.

But your part of the transaction is done.

And your permission doesn’t extend past these limits.

And it pains you to wish harm on him.

But it hurts even more when he does not need you.

So you sit and hate yourself and hope that those heroes with their disgusting philosophies get their shit together just a bit more. So you won’t lose your purpose. So he’ll keep coming through your window, permanently open through rainstorms and snow and spring heat.

Hawks’ breath evens slowly, and you stay still as a watched painting—no shifting eyes or moving limbs.

You crave these times like water or warm food—constant and instinctively.

And this is the only time you’ll ever have them, hands so filled with pinpricks of fried nerves that you can barely feel the soft, relaxed muscle beneath them.

What a tragedy.

What an injustice—

You can only touch him when he’s dying.

***

“Hmm,” he groans, sitting up and wincing as the new flesh protests under his movements.

“You should rest for a bit longer.”

Hawks looks at you, stretched next to him on the mattress—a purposeful few inches of space left between your bodies. It’s both selfish and practical advice.

But he isn’t here for that kind of help.

“You know I can’t just be sittin’ on my ass,” he quips, flashing you that eyes closed, wide smirk that sets your heart hammering in your chest. “Can’t have anyone tracing me back here.”

“Normally I’d agree,” you don’t find it in yourself to give the words any bite, “but you were just actively bleeding out a few minutes ago.”

“Sure, but that was a few minutes ago,” he winks and you can already feel the bed shifting as he moves to settle himself over your hips, one toned thigh on either side to bracket you against the bed. “Now, let me pay you back for all that hard work, yeah sweetheart?”

You wish the way he peered up through those long lashes, gold eyes honed in on you like a piece of meat on a hook, didn’t make your face burn this much.

It doesn’t mean anything to him.

Because this arrangement really is transactional—so you have to get something out of it too. At least, that’s what he tells himself, you think. He doesn’t know that those scant few moments you hold his life between your fingers is more than enough payment.

It’s been this way since the very first time you stumbled across him, half dead in an alley. But then you think it might have just been a ‘heat of the moment’ sort of thing that had just stuck.

You heal him and he makes you writhe on the sheets with his tongue and his hands, until you're fucked into unconscious bliss and he can slip away without your prying eyes watching him go.

But you still aren’t allowed to touch Hawks, even when he reaches into those deep parts of you and molds them to fit only him.

“You don’t—” you start to protest, partly because you want to believe you don’t want it and partly because you want to hear him insist that he does.

“Shh,” Hawks presses a calloused finger to your mouth and it takes every ounce of strength not to suck it past your lips. “I don’t like leaving my debts unpaid.”

That’s the end of your determination for the night. So you try to relax into his touch as slides your bottoms off and tosses them to the floor. Try not to clench up under those fingers that spread your legs. He doesn’t like it when you squirm away, when you flinch from his hands.

You want to think it’s because he hopes you aren’t afraid of him—of what he is—like the rest are, and not because he wants to get it over with as quickly as possible.

You want to.

But he’s so hard to read, and your mind is not often a kind place.

“Mm, god I’m always so hungry after you patch me up baby,” Hawks licks his lips as he stares down at you. “You won’t mind if I eat you right?”

You cringe at how fast your head shakes.

“Mm, course you wouldn’t.”

You can hear the smirk in his voice, and he’s right though you resent it a bit that he’s got you pegged so easily.

But you’re weak, you’re no villain, you’re no hero.

And so you’ll never be able to resist him. But, damn, did you wish you had a name to cry out. Then at the very least, you could keep a part of him with you too. Then you’d have some to moan on the nights he goes uninjured and you have to bring yourself to lonely release, only thinking of him.

Of those wings spread above you like a burning, red sunset, obscuring the rest of the world from view with his blinding light.

“Hawks…” you hiss instead as he shifts your legs over his shoulders and lays his tender chest on the sheets. “Please.”

“Yeah, yeah, what’s it gonna be tonight then?” he asks, breath ghosting over the damp folds between your thighs.

“Thought you said you were gonna use your tongue,” you whine, impatient now for any scrap of attention he’s willing to give.

“If that’s what you want,” he presses a kiss into the crease of your leg and hip, nipping the delicate skin so you whine again. “It’s whatever you want, you know that.”

It isn’t though.

It’s not whatever you want.

You can pick the position, you can ask for his mouth or his fingers, but even then, they won’t go past your neck. Your hands must stay firmly knotted in the comforter and away from him while he works. Cause he is working. This is part of the job to him, it's only in your fantasies that he’s doing it simply for the hell of it.

Hawks nudges your embarrassingly soaked slit with his nose and hums at you, “So is that what you want? Want me to eat your pretty pussy, yeah?”

“Yes—ngh,” you don’t get much in past the confirmation.

He’s a busy man.

He doesn’t have time for your stupid, romantic day dreams.

So he dives right in, and it’s enthusiastic enough that you can convince yourself he simply wants you that badly.

Hawks tongue licks a long strip from your hole to your clit and sucks the little bud past his plush lips. They’re a lovely, soft pink against your skin and they make a mess of you in seconds. He starts up an even rhythm, drawing circles into the nerves that sing and have heat building up in you only seconds after he’s started.

You hate that you love how well he knows your body.

You hate that you only know his when it’s shutting down.

“You taste so good, you know that?” he mumbles, lapping at you and kneading your thighs. “Could live down here just drinking you every fucking day.”

He doesn’t always talk like that but you’re happy he is now. It distracts you from the deep, ingrained urge to yank him by the hair and taste yourself on his lips.

“Makes me wish I’d let those damn heroes get hits in more often,” he’s back to panting and you keen at the sound. “Want my fingers too?”

“Fuck yes,” you don’t even bother hiding the desperation anymore.

He deserves the boost to his ego. You’d shower him with praise if he’d let you, bathe him in warm words and press them into his skin with your tongue.

But he doesn’t let you.

Hawks’ hand on your thigh trails slowly against the sensitive skin until he’s pulling back to run his fingers through your folds to ease the stretch a bit as he pushes two inside. He knows you can take what he gives to you, knows you love the way he fills you up.

Your tingling hands ache to grab his head and force his lips back as he sits for a moment, eyes glued on the space where his fingers disappear into your body. He groans low at the wet sounds your bodies make at their joining. Your legs shake where they rest on him, the one other point of contact he’s allowed. Those deadly soft feathers brush your calves as he curls his fingers up and waits expectantly for the strangled cry he pulls from you.

“There it is,” his voice is so much lower when he speaks now. “Can’t exactly show you the real ones, but how ‘bout you let me make you see some stars, huh?”

He asks so much of you. So much. So often.

In fact, you don’t think you’ve ever actively asked him for a thing he hadn’t already offered in the few years you’d known him. Hawks does it all—the taking and the giving and the demanding.

And you’re simply along for the ride, holding on for dear life lest he drop you, let you plummet like rock to the barren ground.

Still, you are mortal and you crave and you will take what you can get.

“Mhm,” you whimper when his deft fingers increase their pace, not thrusting but grinding mercilessly into that delicious spot inside.

“You wanna cum now, sweet thing?”

Then, true to his villainous nature, Hawks latches his lips back onto your clit, wracking your body with waves of truly sinful pleasure. His tongue draws quick, perfect circles across the bud just how you like. You’ll never know why it feels so much better when it’s him touching you.

How he knows exactly what you want.

Most of it.

Then his other hand is reaching around your hip, thumb taking over to press down where his tongue had been. Panting for the third time, his gorgeous head rests on your thigh and he stares dead on into your eyes. That predator yellow gaze pins you to the pillows better than any hand could and he licks across his lips while you watch, moaning as he tastes you there.

You groan deep and unabashedly at the sight.

“What is it?” he’s teasing you, unable to keep that part of his cruelty hidden even now. “What do you want?”

You shake your head and wish you could turn away, flop against the mattress and writhe but you can’t. You just can’t give up this moment that’s etching itself into your retinas—like you’re staring head on at an eclipse, celestial and short-lived.

“Tell me,” Hawks whispers, nipping at your thigh and working his fingers harder on you. “Whatever you want, you’ll get it.”

And maybe it’s the sudden heat of the room, or the little breeze from his wings spreading defensively to block you from view of his nonexistent audience—the outside world maybe? To keep you, this secret indulgence, hidden from their prying hands. Or quite possibly it’s just your own weakness at the feet of years and years of loving—because you do, you love him, it’s clear by now that’s what this is—this man whose name you don’t know and whose eyes never seem to leave you even when he’s gone.

Maybe you simply crack under the pressure of keeping this awful, looming silence for too long.

You feel your lips split at the seams and it all comes rushing out in a polluted flood—a stagnant river of secrets.

“Let me touch you,” you gasp and close your eyes then just so you won’t have to see that grin slip from his beautiful face. “Please Hawks, let me touch you. I can’t do it anymore, just—I need to kiss you, I need more.”

All this time he hadn’t let up on pulling pleasure from your skin, but he stops now, bringing your release to a screaming halt.

The quiet that follows—devoid of fast breaths and wet slapping—is suffocating.

You wish you regretted the outburst, the waste of years worth of work to keep him coming back.

But you don’t.

Of course you will in a minute, when he slips away and doesn’t return.

But now it just feels as though that boulder of secrecy has been lifted off your chest and you can finally take in lungfuls of sweet, unhindered night air.

It’s only after that dreadful minute has passed and there are still hands on you—buried in you—that you dare to open your eyes again.

Hawks is staring blankly, an expression you’ve never seen before, so stark from the usual quirk of his lips and tilt of his chin. Blank, but calculating. You can see the gears clanking as his thoughts rush a mile a minute, faster than he’d ever dream of soaring over the city skyline.

He blinks once, twice, then again and you can see the redness blooming at the corners as his eyes grow glassy between each flutter of lashes. And then, as though moving through honey, he draws back from you, only to crawl up your body until your noses touch.

You hold your breath, lip caught between your teeth, but his slicked thumb comes up to pull it out of your gnawing reach. He strokes across the puffy skin, never meeting your gaze, until he slowly, slowly leans down.

It’s not really a kiss, more of an accidental brush, so little of your lips touch you could easily have imagined it. When he speaks again, you can feel him forming the words against you.

“I—” he starts and licks his lips and yours and you don’t think it’s an accident, “I can’t.”

It isn’t what you want him to say, but it’s better than a silent loss .

You know truth when you hear it.

“I know.”

And you do, you do know, you’ve always known. He’s darker when he’s not with you. You’ve seen the carnage he leaves behind broadcasted on screens, but it’s never stopped the ache before.

He can’t keep you the way you want, can’t have things that get in the way.

You can only touch him when he’s dying. You can heal him, reform his flesh and bone—pull him back from the brink—but you’ll never feel his chest against yours or his hair slipping through your fingers or have all of him buried inside you. He’ll never love you like you want him to.

It doesn’t stop you from wishing.

And apparently, it doesn’t stop Hawks from kissing you anyway.

“I can’t,” he repeats and it sounds so broken you almost think that wound has reopened and he’s going to start slipping away again.

But the only thing that slips is his tongue past your lips and tangling with your own.

And then the levee breaks.

It’s a sudden torrent of hands and legs knotting together like the torn edges of too many injuries. Hawks covers every available part of you like an addict seeking his fix. It’s breathless and uncoordinated but you’ve never felt more alive, alight, aflame.

He presses his lips to yours again, pulling away and then diving back in. Frantic hands pull you off the mattress until your back is against the headboard and he’s straddling your lap. You take the opportunity to sink your fingers into that goldenrod hair and it’s just as silky as you’d imagined it to be.

Hawks moans into your mouth, kissing you wildly, like the beast he is with teeth clacking and your tongue sucked between his lips.

“I can’t,” he keeps mumbling, between groans and hips grinding and hands grabbing, “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t— “

You wonder then which one of you he’s trying to convince.

But you don’t ask, just let your hands wander to the delicious curve of his ass on your thighs and squeeze, rolling his bulge against you. His fingers push and proud, ghosting across your chest and stopping to pinch your nipple. He drinks down the whimpers you let out, letting his lips wander your jaw and throat, sucking bruises—leaving his own scars on you—as he goes. He pushes you back down to the pillows so his lips can continue their work, latching onto the quickly hardening bud and suckling lightly. His groan sends little shockwaves through you and he looks up with brows furrowed like he’s in pain with how good it all feels.

“I’m sorry,” he says and it’s so soft you barely hear it between licks at your chest.

“No,” you finally find it in you to respond, shaking your head and pulling him back to your lips.

“I’m sorry,” he says again while you nip at his earlobe and down his jaw, tight pants yielding under your hands as they’re tugged away so he’s just as bare as you.

“No,” you shake your head and any response dies on his tongue as you dig your fingers into the feathers at the base of his wings and pull him forward.

Hawks lets out a choked gasp as his length, bare, hard, and leaking glides across your cunt. Any other time, you’d have liked to savor this moment. Get on your knees and worship his pretty cock—and you know it's pretty, just from your short glimpse. He’s long and perfectly thick, just how you dreamed he would be. The cute tuft of blond curls at his base is course in the best way as you trail your fingers through it to take him in your palm.

“Ahh,” he keens, arching above you with his head thrown back as you stroke him for the first time.

It’s been so long, you're not sure how you ever resisted this before. Not with how heavy and warm he is in your fist.

“Hawks,” you moan, sucking at the dip in his collarbone and moving to bite at his nipple. “Hawks, please.”

“I—” you think he might protest but you flick your thumb over the tip and it pours precum to help the slide of your fingers.

He’s already got those powerful arms hooked under your knees, all he has to do is lean forward and sink into that tight, awaiting heat, and he knows it. You can see the resolve cracking.

“Hawks,” you beg again. Because you are begging, that’s what this is.

And he looks at you, drool slipping from the corner of his mouth and brows all bunched up with his head shaking.

“Hawks.”

His hands grip the underside of your thighs and knock your hand from his dick.

“Hawks.”

His forehead comes down to rest against yours, eyes squeezed shut and red at the edges. You feel the sting at the corners as if they were your own.

“Hawks.”

You can only touch him when he’s dying.

Is he dying now?

Are you killing him?

“Hawks.”

His breath hitches, whatever he might have said is long gone when the head of his cock catches against your entrance.

“Hawks—”

He sinks in to the hilt all at once and the last utterance of his name is a yelp. Your walls clamp down hard around the intrusion, so much bigger than his fingers, so hot and long and thick as he pulses inside you.

There are no words after that.

No names, no refusals, just his face pressed up on yours as he pushes your thighs to your chest and rolls his hips, fucking you evenly into the mattress.

Not soft or slow or overly rough.

Though it is all of those things at once as well.

Hawks has always been full of contradictions. It makes sense that this is too.

Both your eyes stay open, lips brushing and sharing breath as he slips a hand back down to your clit and starts those perfect circles up again.

He doesn’t ask you questions now. Just stares in your eyes and sinks his cock into your over and over until you feel fuller, more complete than you ever have in the whole of your life.

There’s no warning leading up to the end. You feel the crest approaching, the coil waiting to snap low in your belly and you don’t dare take your eyes off his face. You need to commit the entirety of this moment to memory. Just in case.

Just in case it never happens again.

Or worse, it happens over and over until it doesn’t.

Until you run out of chances to touch him.

Until he comes to you too far gone.

“Oh fuck,” he mutters and that’s all the warning you get.

All the warning you have the strength to listen to as you tumble over the edge, waves of rolling pleasure burning under your skin. You clench hard around his cock as his hips stutter in their pace, thrusting unevenly as you gush and he spills rope after rope of hot release deep into you.

And you’d been wrong before, because this was full. This was whole, your stilling bodies pressed together at every point with his cock still hard and twitching as your walls milked him of cum that warmed you from the inside out.

This is what you would die for.

***

Later when you stumble into unwilling wakefulness, there are hands tucking a thin sheet over your bare skin.

Hawks has pulled himself from you after resting like you’d told him he should. He’s dressing, though not hurriedly, and you can’t find it in your jelly bones to move or stop him.

You’re both silent, even when he looks down to find your eyes alert and raking over him—costume donned and wings prepared for flight.

His face is drawn in a way that might have been resentment. Maybe towards you for breaking his resolve, maybe at himself for indulging in what he cannot have.

I can’t.

You hear the words as clear as though he’d just said them.

I can’t.

Can’t have you. Can’t forget his purpose. Can’t have gentle things.

Hawks is a villain, first and foremost, above all else and that includes you.

So you don’t move to stop him as he walks softly through your door. You just watch as he makes his way to the open window and perches on the ledge. He does look back, only briefly, to see you draped across the sheets, head resting on your arm and staring at him as he leaves you.

The ghost of that cheeky grin crawls its way onto his face before he tips backwards off the landing and into the night sky. He winks once before the indigo of the night swallows him like the maw of a leviathan. The city has teeth and it will chew him up and spit him back out into your arms soon enough.

So you’re content to wait.

You know this isn’t the last time. That he’ll come back to you as he’s always done. And offer you more and more of himself each time.

Because you can only touch him when he’s dying.

And this world is nothing if not determined to kill him.

So you can keep your purpose.

And by extension, you can keep him.

[dittomckiddo]

You mentioned a Dark Choco harem at some point. I need an elaboration on all of that please

Dude. Tumblr crashed on me after I wrote put the Whole answer and just deleted all my hard work. I'm gonna scream.

Ok, so.

This is based off mostly the kingdom storyline (spoilers) after Enchantress is defeated the Cookies of Darkness kind of just get taken in by the heroes and/or Vanilla and make it clear "Our evil plans are not over they're on hold" and so Dark Choco mingles with heroes, old and new friends killing time (end spoilers).

Darkmint is based off this glorious headcanon/canon:

So basically they have history, had and currently have mutual crushes, and bond over the good times in life.

Darkwolf is based off the fandom's interpretation that Dark Choco is the friend Werewolf speaks of hurting and scaring and then running off they have history and I believe they would've met again as Werewolf could've easily ended up in either the heroes or CoD's care and how I interpret it is Dark Choco sees them both as monsters "We can find comfort in each other when no one understands us".

Darkwhip is basically like a little delusional magical fairytale where I see the fandom use Whip's ability to negate Dark Choco's curse so he can see not only the sky but the shining sun as well so Whip feels like the hero in the fairytale that lifts the Beast's curse and Dark Choco certainly feels like the Beast and that Whip is somewhat curing him for a time they both get caught up in a fantasy.

Now Darkmilk is my favorite because it had Milk who is my Favorite I've basically gone "my city now" for Milk's character it's unbelievable the Devsisters cannot stop me anyways when Dark Choco saved Milk all those years ago it inspired baby's first crush/love that helped inspire and mold him into everything he is today he owes Dark Choco everything for who he turned out to be and when they met he excitedly welcomed him with open arms which didn't turn out too well given Dark Choco is always on edge, sword trigger happy, and hates being reminded sometimes of who he used to be especially when it's flaunted so they don't get along for a while despite Milk trying to until Dark Choco overhears Milk explaining it one day to someone "Oh I know he's awful now he needs so much work it's not even funny but he was there for me when I needed him and I'll be there for him at his lowest you cannot choose who you love unconditionally but you can do your best to set them straight! And as tough as a job this is I am strong and determined!" so Dark Choco take aback a bit leaves and starts opening up to Milk a little more knowing Milk doesn't in fact see him as perfect he just wants to help.

Now! That's just what I have now if anyone has any other ships I'm unaware of that can work I can definitely squeeze them in. Other than that I love (hate) Dark Choco he's a super fun and great character to play with (he's so pathetic and sad) and he doesn't deserve a harem but everyone involved loves and wants him even of he doesn't deserve them and they deserve better if it makes them happy I'll give him to them afterall it has good chances to make him better not saying that love fixes everything just that they'd be some good influences.

[thisandthat-whatever]

That Ashley blog is definitely something! She's spews so much vitriol towards Tom simply because she doesn't like him and doesn't want Zendaya tied to him? Ok, there's alot of "bad" actors and shady actors in HW that probably deserve to be shit on, but I'm not going to waste my precious time on SM crying about them. A person only does that for 2 reasons, either they're a miserable human being or they're threatened by that person.....I think she may be a combination of both. And the way she contradicts herself......HW thinks Tom is a joke, but every director in HW is trying to work with Zendaya.....yet Zendaya doesn't have the power to remove herself from this PR relationship? Z doesn't like Tom and thinks he's beneath her, but yet she's doing him a favor for the last 6 years (minus a short break) by saying he's her best friend, attending events with him, allowing him to spend weekends plus at her home, inviting him to her family's Thanksgivings, sharing clothes with him, traveling to London to see him....AND THIS IS ALL PRIOR TO JULY 2021!!! Idk about you, but I wouldn't do that for anyone if I weren't down bad for that person even if they wanted to pay me for it. 4-5 months, maybe? 4-5 years, no way! She just lives in a very negative, delusional world. She needs to wake up and realize Z isn't her POC Barbie Doll.

Dude, I told you she is a certifiable lunatic. She acts like Tom uses Z for connection because no one knows or cares about him in Hollywood and that take shows how removed she is from reality. He is the one who has presidents of huge movie companies in his speed dial and making big franchises get green-lit just because he had an idea, and having more A-list actors than Z can count sing him praises .

I had many fights with this lowlife Ashley chick in my old blog in 2017 when I was “tomh-tomh”. I just laugh at her stupidity now but she is definitely a miserable loser who gets off on hating because for more than five years that is all she has posted. Hate on Val’s then-gf/now-wife and also Tom. She doesn’t even care much for Z. She is a special case of anti where she actually enjoys this delusional activity. So, some antis may give up after a year of defeat but this chick is so beyond any reason and sanity that she will go on like this until she dies. So, it is better to simply laugh at her and ignore because you can’t reason with nor fix her type of mental fuckups.

[comradedreammoved]

i wonder what'll be the turning point for mcyttwt and other stan fanbases on Twitter. I'm kinda scared for the future, everyday I see posts going viral on local/gen-pop Twitter talking about the parasocial relationships, entitlement, and general delusion about activism that mcyttwt has with cc's, and I wonder what it will take for that to become a widespread consensus/opinion within mcyttwt. It seems like most normies and "non-stans" concur that stans' ideas of making cc's speak out on issues that they're not qualified or educated enough to speak about is unproductive and stupid. It's so frustrating to see how delusional mcyttwt drama and "issues" look from the outside, while simultaneously seeing dreams tl always be filled with people who are proud to constantly be "calling him out" or "on his ass". the sick entitlement that a lot of stan accounts have fuel some type of superiority complex they have for being endlessly "critical" of dream is a complete joke. he gets @'d in threads that get a couple thousand likes every single hour that come from the mcyttwt bubble. I see posts THREATENING dream to speak out, some giving him time limits of 2 days to tweet or else he'll be labeled as performative, antiblack, and ignorant to minority issues. the threads are made by chronically online 15 y/o's that expect him to somehow fix all racial microagressions on social media and mcyttwt by making a probably pretty uneducated thread of tweets on his ~main~ account. i don't understand how these stans can consistently tell antis' that it doesn't matter what dream says and that he doesn't control the actions of his entire fanbase (there's always gonna be people who send dt's), but then turn around and claim that a statement from him on Twitter is gonna somehow solve all the antiblackness within the community. AND additionally it's a COMMUNITY problem, idk why everyone is so dead-set on making dream into the mouthpiece for every issue, while also criticizing him for trying to be the mouthpiece for everything?? of my 7+ years on Twitter, I've never seen a community so hypocritical, apathetic, and disillusioned. my life on Twitter has essentially just become me hate scrolling through my timeline, watching all the insanely ridiculous, awful threads go bye, hoping that dream deletes the app.

idk why i just wrote an essay, but i had to rant

i honestly dont have much to add u said it all 💀 i have been thinking about what the turning point could be though, and i guess it’d have to be by the ccs cuz even respected third party hasan called their threads performative and it didn’t change anything LMAO. either that or quarantine lifts and ppl become less terminally online and/or the fandom loses popularity and becomes easier to manage. idk if it can be solved from inside the fandom anymore cuz there’ve been a LOT of threads and essays from reddit/tumblr i’ve seen gain traction, but then something always seems to make them take a step back and then we’re back to square one.

[punkscowardschampions]

China & America

China: [After School] China: Where are you? China: You left your clothes on the bathroom floor and he's threatening to ✂ them up and she's just sitting there nodding America: ✂💳 after buying new 👌 China: Hilarious China: but you'd have to pry his wallet out his tight arse first and he's waving the ✂ about like right now America: 😐 America: terrorist negotiations are a no no China: Oh, believe me, if he knew you were on the 📞 he'd be straight on to shout at you himself America: if he wants me to walk around naked that's his damage America: she's guaranteed not sitting there 😶 when I do China: They're your best jeans China: you already don't have enough decent gear, you're seriously going to risk it? America: they'll be my best denim cut offs America: I don't come running for him China: Because it's not freezing 11 months and a half out of the year, Ricky China: I don't either but like fuck would I let him trash any of my stuff America: move us 🏝🧉 Gaz 👏 China: You want to fake as delusional as her? China: Fine, I'll be the only one living in reality, trying to talk some sense back into the woman and stopping him from ruining literally everything we've got America: back into? America: you've got jokes China: Please China: She was never this bad before China: or at least for this long, it'd be three weeks max of the lovesick bit and then she'd always come back and be mam again America: from your 🏰 that's the view China: There's nothing about this house that's castle like but he's definitely taken the only appeals it had away China: you miss having the parties and the hangs too America: they're still happening America: Gaz doesn't run the 🌏 America: can't roll out of 🛏 onto a dance floor but it's not 😢 China: But it was better when we could throw them China: and there was no rules around here, period China: You're just giving him reason to stay, the man's a raving lunatic, instead of saying no tah it's like his new cause to fix this family and save us both China: Must've been a fucking general in a past life America: there still aren't, his don't count America: & you're not giving him a reason to fucking go so 🤫 China: You say that but any time we have to be here China: and we do, at least some of the time, we can't do what we always did before and he's calling the shots China: I'm trying to figure out what the hell that would look like, what are you doing? America: watch me America: I'll throw a party right now China: Really China: Good luck with that China: Jesus, he'll lock you up, you know he will, if he doesn't do worse beforehand America: What's Daddy Garry gonna do? Hit me? America: They'd lock him up America: & his head'll 🤯 before mine does China: You don't remember some of the boyfriends she's had China: it's not funny, for fuck's sake China: I want my life back America: the trauma hasn't run deep enough to give me memory loss & you're not old enough to play that card America: it can be anything I want, it's my life America: I remember when we had live laugh love on the kitchen wall China: You know what? China: Let him rip up all your sketty clothes China: you're being selfish, why should I help you America: now the 👖 don't know whose side you're on America: they were THE BEST when you wanted me to come back China: I'm on the side of this family China: but you only care about yourself, apparently America: you're on your own side America: you care about having your life back, not what mine looks like China: I'm the one here arguing with him for your stuff right now China: and I just want things back how they were, for all of us China: him gone and her like an actual person with thoughts and emotions about anything that ain't what he wants America: you said yourself he won't leave if I act any kind of way America: he's crusading America: & I don't look old enough to get high enough to do a mam impression America: what do you fucking expect me to do, Chi? China: Help me work this out! China: Together China: you're still here, you don't get to wash your hands of it and ignore it like Zsa does because it doesn't really matter to her China: as long as he isn't hitting any of us and maybe even then, who the fuck knows with her America: don't ! at me America: if it were that simple, togetherness could get fucked China: It ain't, that's the whole problem and what no one else seems to grasp right now China: we act up, he's got more cause to stay and get progressively worse until we can't do anything and go anywhere China: we do what he wants and stay in line, he'll probably get such a boner he'll try to marry her and adopt us America: the audacity of me taking a 🚿 in my own home China: I know China: why is he not telling her to do more washing? America: be a controlling fuckwit but make it useful America: you could be wayyyyyyyy more productive with this, sir China: I'm not saying that's right either but it's all about how WE have no respect China: she's stopped doing anything that isn't doing her 💅💄👗 for him and we're meant to do it all, apparently America: Mam has respect for his 💪🍆🍑 China: 🤮 China: It goes without saying, but he's literally fuck ugly America: but I DEMAND it's said America: he needs to know on the regs China: He's got this one wrinkle on his forehead that's so deep I reckon it could hold a ✎ China: I hate him America: if you put your 💄 in there next time he's 😪💻 , I'll let you use a DIFFERENT ONE on me China: Alright China: I'll use one of hers America: would she end it if he had 0 hair? America: or eyebrows China: His hairline is dead and she acts like she don't notice China: It's like a spell, or something America: I know someone who'd come over for a face tattoo America: or 🍆🍑 if that's all she cares about China: You do not China: and he doesn't have enough of either to cover, shh America: I do TOO China: Who? America: Si is bored enough without your parties he bought a tattoo gun online China: Oh God China: do not do it he'll be so bad, never mind the hepatitis America: & he's dyslexic China: 😂 China: I can't wait to see what bullshit he decides to misspell on himself then America: [sends her some pics because imagine] China: He's so lame China: I can't believe Gary has wrecked my chance with Jake America: his da is a fuckwit too you'd think he'd be more understanding China: like I wanna tell him anything about this China: it's shaming enough we can't throw the parties no more and everyone knows why America: he's part of the everyone, he already knows China: doesn't mean I want to go and cry about it China: I've got some pride, thank you America: he should have some America: never throws a party at his own house China: That was one of the only things we had going for us America: weakkk America: you have things going for you, ask mam when she recovers from this illness China: Okay, the main thing China: but he's going to start going out with Lucie now instead, I know it America: Lucie's been out with half his friends before him America: not a ringing endorsement, like China: Yeah, she's a right slag, and she'll do it anywhere so she don't even need the free house America: get nan out of hers, she'd do it for the sake of your love life China: We have bigger problems China: sort that one and the rest will fall back into place, yeah America: biggest problem that we don't know how to sort it America: I'll get him to hurt me 🚨🚔 we're almost there China: That's not a solution China: and they won't do fuck all about it until it's serious China: too serious to control America: is if it works America: we know he wants to throw me out the window with the 👖 America: & maybe all the boys will think I'm into some hardcore bdsm shit China: Shut up you don't know anything about that America: 👌 Jake's vanilla that's a shame China: You're 12 and that's not the kind of reputation you want or are gonna have China: that's for girls like Lucie who have fuck all else to offer so they have to go hard with that degrading shit America: told you there was more on offer from us than a free house 😛 America: but stop walking into all my traps that easy China: You're such a dick 🙄😏 China: I didn't mean that was all but fucking hell, it was clearly a big draw China: so many people are airing me right now America: you know who doesn't care about parties? America: the people you air China: Who??? America: [a list which obvs includes Bobby and Libi on it and probably Beck as well] China: So you're just going to list every random loser in school for what? America: 😐 America: & you're gonna kid yourself that there's not at least 3 boys on there hotter than Jake America: get out of your fucking ⬛ China: it's not JUST about hot though, is it China: it's all the rest America: what else has Jake got? China: He's cool America: he's not cool enough to throw a party for you America: you're bored China: I am bored right now America: What's the point of Gaz if he doesn't take her anywhere anymore? America: why's she not bored? China: Yeah get this China: they're talking about redecorating America: what.the.fuck. China: I know China: it's looked like this our entire lives because she can't afford it China: now he thinks he can come in and whitewash everything America: remember when that one before offered to put up a roll of wallpaper and she looked at him like he said he wanted to beat you to death with it America: she'd let Gary kill us China: say goodbye to live laugh love China: it'll be RESPECT RESPECT RESPECT America: he needs to fuck off or I am China: Where to China: no one's got a sofa comfy enough or the desire to do any more than offer a night America: I know plenty of people I can get to desire me China: 🖕 China: not falling for it again so soon America: no 🕷🕸 America: they're not people I want, I didn't say that China: That's not a solution, again China: this is our house China: and our mam China: we need to sort it America: I know China: I can't think around them though China: I need to get out America: meet me [wherever the hell she is rn] China: Okay China: as I have nowhere else to be rn America: bring me a jacket China: assuming you've got one left after his tantrum China: that WILL be resumed, when you're relocated 🙄 America: if he's that desperate to text me China: He's that desperate to shout 'til he looks like a 🍅 America: 😋🤤 China: If you liked it or him at all, you'd be here America: I'm waiting here for you America: with ☕ China: I'm on my way America: I'll text Jake to be here & 🏃👌 China: You will not America: you wanna see him & you're not gonna hit send China: Because I have dignity, I don't know why that's a foreign concept to you China: and I don't even want to see him America: you do, you're losing it that he doesn't wanna see you China: Don't be dramatic on my behalf China: and getting my little sister to beg for me, that's hardly going to win anyone over America: I was gonna pretend to be you China: Ha! China: I'd love to see that, not America: party trick America: if we ever have one again China: If anyone wants to come by the time we've worked this out, it'll be a miracle America: it is getting 🥱 China: Seriously China: not getting aired for no reason America: you should listen to me about nan America: have one there China: The only person who would have a party at their nans house is Libi Foley America: it is mint there China: 🙄 America: it is China: Why? She got a trampoline? 👌 America: getting low if you're getting jealous America: [but whatever pics or vids we have from being there however many times we have like] China: I don't know what you reckon is cool in [whatever year they're in] these days America: her 🏠 America: some of her friends America: but I think I scared her off China: Well forget her China: She thinks she's something special but she's so not America: you're not describing her China: Sure China: If she's making you feel shitty she's hardly the 😇 everyone thinks she is America: how did you twist it to be her fault from what I said? America: 🤯 China: You aren't scary, she can't hang America: she didn't have you green lighting her on what cool is America: that's why I can China: She's super immature America: that shit must fly cos she's super well liked too China: With other people on your list, maybe America: you know she's got friends on friends, we don't have to downplay it America: it's not gonna make us feel a new way about any of the 💩 going on China: Literally why are we talking about her China: I've got so much more on my mind America: You brought her up to veto nan's house as a party place America: cos you don't want her to hate you too China: It isn't a party place, she's an old lady China: that would be so lame China: she doesn't have a boyfriend, where are we sending her? America: bingo America: use Zsa's flat then, she has a boyfriend, he's all she ever talks about China: Her tiny one bed China: I could have a few main people, potentially America: Princess and the pea isn't a sexy story America: if you're gonna kick it like that with Jake he will fuck Lucie in the PE block China: That's his prerogative if he wants to catch herpes America: everything doesn't have to be perfect America: you 🔊 like Gary China: If Asia is going to stop talking to me, it needs to at least be worth it America: you could trash the place and she'd think she did it 🔎 for her fake gucci belt China: 🙄 China: at least we don't have to worry about her man lasting America: ✂️💖 China: I don't know why they do it America: what are you doing with Jake? China: I'm not China: not like them America: I don't believe you China: Well first off, he's actually decent looking and cool China: and that's the difference China: Gary isn't, and whatshisname isn't either China: and I'm not throwing myself at him America: he isn't cool to me America: if it was so different you'd care about that China: How is he not? America: 🤡 China: What the hell does that mean? America: he thinks he's funny and he's not China: You don't have to think he is China: you're not interested and he's not interested in you China: that's a bit different to Gary fucking up our lives and taking over our mam America: he doesn't need to talk about me ever then China: I'm sure he won't...? America: 😐 China: He's not talking about either of us right now America: 🎊🎉 China: Happy for you America: I'd be happy for you if you used the Gary situation to get a boyfriend who's less of a dick China: Like who? China: [list boys from that list] China: LOL America: 🖕 America: [because we know the boy she likes is on that list honey] China: Who do you fancy then? America: dream on, shady bitch America: I'm not revealing my secrets now China: 😂 China: Omg go on China: I'll work it out America: if Gaz keeps treating me like a little girl without the choking, spitting in my mouth or giving me euros to spend, it's not gonna matter America: he'll think I'm immature China: You're such a dick China: but he's older then China: narrows it down America: as old as you, not as old as daddy Gary China: Well I can work out who it isn't then America: you've got other shit to prioritise China: You should get a boyfriend your own age America: I'm not getting one China: When you do, then America: when I do I won't be doing a poll of our year America: he's fun that's why I like him America: the 2 years aren't what's making me 🤤 China: What's fun mean America: he can hang China: I know who it is America: happy for you China: He's okay, I guess China: if you like that sort of thing America: what the hell does that mean? China: He's a bit China: but if you like him America: a bit? China: Annoying China: but you don't have to see him around school America: I thought you had a real concern! China: I'm not mam, we've still got one China: I just don't think he's cute but he's not like, the worst China: I don't know why he hangs around with who he does though, maybe he's weird America: Jake is who you think is cute & cool so 🤫 China: He's the hottest boy in my year China: who isn't like, the preppy sporty type America: & he acts like it America: talking down to everyone China: You're dramatic America: 😐 America: he is, behaving like 👑 China: You're acting like I'm married to him, for starters China: we were never even officially going out America: cos he wants to fuck around & find out who else is 🤤 China: He can do what he likes America: with Lucie & you won't care at.all. China: 🖕 America: me getting 🍆 could bring mam out of her coma China: If she finds out before Gary China: that might actually be a decent way to look into it China: 'cos clearly, 👑 has failed to save us all America: 👌 I'll do what I can China: all you have to do is heavily hint you are, in the 0.2 milliseconds he leaves her alone America: I'll stand on the 🚽 while she's 🛁 China: Take a piss test China: that should trigger the fear response America: they're expensive America: be going in Gaz's wallet again China: nah, you can get them for a euro in dealz China: market for the skanky slags like Lucie, duh America: I'll go after school tomorrow, he won't be leaving her alone tonight after ✂👖 China: Ew China: I'm definitely finding somewhere else to be America: seconded China: This is ridiculous China: Nan's going to get fed up of us crashing at hers America: that day came a month in China: but like, fed up to the point he'll talk her out of letting us because we should 'be at home' or whatever the fuck China: 🕠 running out America: What a flirty little game of 🐈 & 🐁 America: game on, Gaz China: 🙄 China: We've got no choice so, yeah America: Where are you gonna go? China: 🤷 China: I don't know America: come with me China: Where are you going? America: When you've got nowhere else, 3rd degree questioning's pointless China: Why is it hard to answer a question? America: I don't have an answer yet China: Right China: well, whatever then America: whatever yes or whatever no? China: So you need a dedicated answer, do you? China: You invited me, shouldn't make any difference if I do or don't come, as you've got no idea where you're going America: & you think my pretend babydaddy is annoying China: He very literally is China: if you wanna talk about thinking you're funny, Jesus America: he has a basis for it America: he's got jokes that aren't about what every girl at school looks like China: He's got adhd China: I think America: When he said he was on 💊s not what I thought he meant China: He must have it bad he's so twitchy still China: and he never shuts up China: which is probably why he's friends with the deaf kid America: I take it back, you and Jake are well suited 🤡 China: What? That's not a joke China: it just makes literal sense China: he's so loud America: You're being a dick China: Oh I am not China: it's not like I'm saying it to his face America: you know I like his face & you're saying it to me China: Well you know I like Jake and you're being a dick about him so in that case, we'd be even America: he can help having a shitty personality, that's not the same as an adhd diagnosis China: okay then China: an excuse to have prescribed speed America: what's your excuse for not calling the deaf kid by his name? China: Why does it matter? China: You knew who I meant America: it matters that you're back in your 🏰 China: 🙄 Shut up China: again, not talking to him, just you America: no shit, you don't talk to anyone outside of your ⬛ America: just me China: We're sisters so China: we have to talk, so sorry America: I know how to do a smoky eye & take a drink, that's your main criteria for what a cool girl is China: You wish America: it's not something I'm prioritising pre or post Gary America: you're stuck with me anyway China: And you're stuck with me China: at the minute, that's basically all we've got China: Zsa is literally not taking it in, no surprise there China: and nan is drinking the kool-aid on him now so America: I'll bring mam back with my 🤰 it'll be fine China: **fake 🤰 America: I assumed that was clear cos of having no real 🍆 inside of me before tomorrow America: Gary probably doesn't want to kiss & make up like that, I'm only 12 China: What do you mean tomorrow? America: assuming I do the test in front of her then China: Don't require you to actually do the deed, idiot China: s'all fake, we don't need you to go have a fake abortion, Jesus America: I'm just saying we don't need to waste time typing out a distinction like **fake when it's obvious China: Don't be a twat, I was just saying China: you're so bloody pedantic today, my God America: Don't be putting some kind of tempting fate 🤰 hex on me before I've even done anything with any boys China: Don't be a little slag and nothing will happen China: not going to be me or fate doing anything about it, you're in control America: right now Gary is America: 🚫🍆 China: It's about more than that America: I know China: You don't get it America: What don't I get? China: I've lost loads of friends China: maybe all of them America: you'll get them back the parties are America: when* China: yeah America: I'm fixing it China: **WE are America: did you save my 👖? China: Yea China: I put a load of washing on China: so now you're gonna owe me a thank you China: didn't know what else to do, he likes pitting us against each other I reckon America: I bought you ☕ ungrateful bitch China: UM, I meant you're going to owe me a grovelling thank you arselick because Gary says so China: I'm behaving and you're not, right now, cheeky cow China: anyway, I'm nearly there so don't fucking bin it America: I'll put washing on when my newborn is sleeping China: Fucking hell 😂 China: It's tragic, isn't it China: I can't think of anything more tragic China: poor mam China: poor nan America: how old do you have to be before they let you get sterilised? China: Oh, so old China: tell 'em you want to live off the state forever and have 14 of 'em and maybe they'll change their fucking mind America: Gary would do it for me if he was any fucking use China: If you ever really get pregnant, the botched abortion would do it America: I'll pitch the idea to my 1st boyfriend China: Good luck America: we're in the right place 🍀 China: Are we? China: Doesn't feel like it America: for a backstreet foetus killing scheme anyway China: Whatever brightside, I guess America: you sound as tired as I feel America: how early did he wake you? I think it was still fully dark out China: I swear, only solid he's done me China: loads of time to do a full hair and make-up routine America: What classes do you even have with Jake? Like 2 China: Oh, so now just 'cos I don't want to look like a bag of shit that's all about him too? China: Are you sure YOU aren't like them? China: Ugh America: you don't look like 💩 America: it's about him if you suddenly think you do China: I don't think that I just China: I'm not winning anyone back 'round if I do America: it's about the lack of parental supervision not your lack of split ends America: on every level you know that China: It is not China: that's a big part of it, but it is not all of it America: if it's not all of it where are they all? China: There's plenty of boys who care about pretty China: even if Jake isn't one of them China: if I have a desirable boyfriend, that's fucking something America: Jake does care about pretty, that's his main priority America: & why he's a dick to me China: You should've said China: you fancy him America: I'd fuck Gary before him, you delusional cow China: Ha, okay China: you're the one who's so hung up on how he treats you China: I'm so sorry he doesn't fancy you back but I'm actually not because you know I like him America: cos I want you to give a shit that your not boyfriend is like bullying me China: Wow, bullying now, really? America: you're asking for me to throw this ☕ at you China: I won't even come if you're going to be this China: melodramatic China: what do you mean bullying you? America: I mean every party you've thrown he's said something unnecessary to me China: Can you be more specific or America: can you not take my fucking word for it? China: Well not really China: like, if he's just made some passing comments it's not really bullying, is it America: 😐 America: 👌 make excuses for him & keep telling me you're doing things different China: For God's sake China: since when are you so sensitive? America: I've kept my mouth shut until literally now China: As you said, literally, he's joking America: I'm tired & I've typed the name Jake more times than I've ever wanted to China: You can't just accuse people of shit they haven't done China: if it was that simple, we'd say Gary was touching us and ta-da, problem solved America: I'll go down that route if the 🤰 fails China: It's not a fucking joke China: fuck this America: it is if you think I'm living like this for the next 6 years minimum China: You think 4 makes it any more palatable? America: telling a lie to get rid of him is the least of what I'm prepared to do China: I can't think straight right now China: save your ☕ I'm gonna go somewhere else America: Chi China: It's fine America: you're basically here China: I'm going China: I've got plans now America: you do not China: I do now America: with who? China: None of your business America: with who China: Who do you think China: happy now? America: what.the.fuck. China: Leave it alone America: Have you been talking to him all along? China: No, actually China: though I'm sure you won't believe me America: can't believe a word any of you say America: I hope he gives you herpes China: Nice America: You're not, why should I? China: You started this China: and for your information, I've never slept with him, or anyone else America: I did NOT China: then you got in my head America: not on purpose China: I've got my own life America: that wasn't in question China: I don't need your pity America: I don't feel sorry for you China: Good America: I'm fine too, thanks for asking China: You've got friends, who don't just use you for parties China: as you've been so keen to rub in America: & you're calling me over sensitive China: Joke all you lie China: k* America: you think Jake's are better China: Yeah, I do America: 👌🍆😗 China: Jealous much America: LOL China: Enjoy pining after Tweak America: 🖕 China: Enjoy your evening, that's my plan America: talk yourself into it harder America: maybe you will China: 👌🍆😗 America: 🤮🤮🤮 China: I'm not faking a pregnancy America: Lucie's not fake swallowing China: Ugly girls have more to prove America: you 🔊 like Jake America: he'll be excited as hell China: yeah he will America: 🎊🎉 he can stop trying to suck his own dick 🥳 China: you're just a kid China: let me know where you end up, Zsa's or nan's China: and I'll take the other 👌 America: you can take either cos I'm doing neither China: You know what, fine China: I shouldn't be the one doing this America: What this do you mean? Whoring yourself out to Jake or pretending you care what I'm going to do China: Looking after you China: are any of them in your messages? doubt it China: he's got no right and he goes too far but at least he'll be giving a shit where you are America: I don't need tabs kept on me, I'm going to MJ's not to 🍆 or 💊💉 China: 👍 America: I had a feeling Gaz wouldn't be stepping up to make 🍝 China: I can thank him for the diet too America: he'll be thrilled to hear about the 🍆😗 part of it China: I'm not planning to regale him with it China: 'cos not tempting an assault tah America: Mam & Zsa will have more useful tips China: I don't need them China: thank God America: just Jake telling you what he likes 💖 China: Piss off America: 🏰👑💖 China: Yeah, really feel it America: he'll make you feel really good about yourself China: What would you know about it, Ricky? America: it's what you want him for, I know that China: Why wouldn't I want that? China: Just because you've not had it ever America: Why can't you get it from someone else? China: Because I like Jake China: end of America: 😐 China: and every girl but you does too America: [lists all the girls that don't aka the lesbians, other girls he has shaded and girls like libi who are shamelessly in love with someone else/have boyfriends they care about even a little bit] China: 🙄🙄 China: You've got too much time on your hands China: not going to list every girl that does China: you know who I meant and that it's true America: I just spent a decade I won't get back waiting for you China: I wasn't about to come to MJ's and beg for food with you so America: I didn't invite you there, it's where I'm going now since you're on a Jake's jizz diet China: Don't be gross America: It's you who likes him 🤢 China: It's you who keeps talking about his dick China: like, stop America: I'm desensitising you America: so you can bear to look at & touch it China: I don't need that America: then this is me 🤫 China: 👍 China: Thanks China: Guess I'll see you in school tomorrow, or just before, pretending we've been 🛏 or purposely showing we're just coming in China: who knows what will be more effective in the AM America: you do one, I'll try the other China: Yeah China: know which one you'd prefer China: I'm not playing nice so you don't have to, like I always have America: you weren't playing when it was just you & mammy America: neither was I China: She was fun China: before America: I know China: What's not to like America: as her favourite, you would say that China: 🙄 America: & it doesn't matter who she was America: she's a zombie now China: we'll get her back America: What's the cure for swallowing Gary's bodily fluids? China: She's had worse China: equally as bad America: built up immunity China: There's no immunity to shitty men America: as you've proven China: pot kettle America: I don't like Jake, you're deluded China: I wasn't talking about him, moron America: 🖕 China: No, he seems like SUCH a cool, chill guy America: you'd be a shady bitch whatever you think he's like cos you're mad I don't wanna hop on Jake's 🍆 China: Yeah, SO mad China: you're twisted China: and delusional if you think it'd be any kind of competition America: you admitted you want me to be jealous & that his appeal is everyone likes him so yeah America: your priorities are twisted China: When did I? America: read any of this chat back China: 👍 Good one China: I really don't care what you think China: your taste is clearly trash America: I'd follow your ☕ into the bin but it'll make me late for 🍝 China: 😱 China: Can't have that China: I'm waiting for my bus, talk later America: 👋

[jedifighterpilot2727]

Kryptonian Lena headcanon: Taylor gives Lexi a bracelet as an anniversary gift and kara and Lena interpret it as a marriage proposal, because thats what giving bracelets meant on krypton. So when they see it they're like "Lexington Luthor Danvers you did NOT get married without even telling us" and its a cute little misunderstanding

So I changed it from Kryptonian Lena to regular Lena since I wanted to make it a full chapter! Hope you don’t mind!The Bracelet

Lexington Olivia Luthor-Danvers is beyond ecstatic.

She’s … she’s …  

What’s the English word?

Euphoric.

Yeah, that’s it.

Euphoric.

Intense excitement and happiness.

She can feel it, tingling along her nerve cells, tapping her fingers against her thigh as she studies the interactive galaxy hologram in front of her.

It’s her birthday, one of her favorite holidays. It isn’t like the winter holidays, where all of her family gets together and the laughter fills the apartment. And isn’t like her adoption day, where she just feels so much and all at once. But still, it’s nice and people are nice, and she had brunch with Taylor that morning and her moms are on their way to take her to dinner…

It’s a nice day, and she sighs happily as she gazes up at the planets and stars swirling around her. She needs to remember to get with Uncle Winn next time she visits National City so they can program in the new planetary system that was discovered last week. She could do it herself, but it’s their project, she can’t just fix it without him. Even if all it would take was a simple -

A knock on her dorm room door startles her out of her thoughts and she bounces up, throwing it open to reveal her parents standing in the hall.

Kara is mid-sentence when she launches herself towards her ieiu.

Her ieiu gives the best hugs - tight and warm and perfectly calming to her jittery nerves. They stand like that for a long moment, swaying back and forth with the force of their embrace before Lexi pulls back.

“Happy birthday, little one.”

She grins at the nickname before turning towards her Mama, not hesitating as she pulls her into an equally fierce hug, the smell of expensive perfume flooding her senses. It smells like home, in a way that she can never replicate, and she sighs contentedly.

Some people (most people), would be scared shitless at the sight of Lena Luthor- Danvers standing in their doorway; all four inch stilettos, knee length trench coat and a tight bun, but Lexi’s never been able to see her that way. She has a healthy respect for her parents of course, but how can she be scared of someone who does all the voices (British accent included), when she reads Harry Potter?

“Happy birthday, Ma’ Chroi.” Lena whispers against her hair and she grins again before pulling back to tug them both inside.

“I just have to get my shoes and we can go, Taylor is meeting us at the restaurant - she had a last minute assignment she had to work on.”

“No rush, the reservation isn’t for another half hour.” Lena smiles, gazing around at the hologram. “The Dewalt system isn’t in programmed in here yet.”

“I finished working up the code for the planet scans yesterday, but I wanted Uncle Winn to help me program it in.”

“Ah!” Kara exclaims. “Speaking of Uncle Winn and Uncle James… “ She digs around in her purse for a moment before presenting Lexi with a small but beautifully wrapped package. “They said something about how they couldn’t send this through the mail.”

Lexi’s hand darts out to grab the package as she squeals in delight.

“Yes! The cheat code synthesizer we’ve been working on for Warlocks and- I mean, the totally legal, definitely not cheating … expansion pack.”

She looks nervously to Kara but her mother’s eyes are trained on her wrist.

“What’s that?”

“What?” She raises her arm, the bracelet on her wrist sliding across her skin. “This?”

They’ve caught Lena’s attention now, because she shuts down the hologram and focuses on Lexi.

“Is that a bracelet?”

“Yes? Taylor gave it to me for my birthday.”

“Taylor gave it to you?“

She hasn’t heard her ieiu speak in that tone since she and Astraid ‘accidentally’ orbited the Earth.

Her heart rate quickens.

“Well, I mean she made it? She’s been taking a metallurgy class … “

Lena grasps her hand, gently bringing the bracelet up to eye level.

“It’s a beautiful bracelet.”

To anyone else, it would sound normal, but Lexi can hear the slight tremor.

Was she going to cry?

She wants to ask what’s wrong, but Kara’s voice interrupts her thoughts.

“Isn’t it a little soon for bracelets?” Kara’s hand comes up to adjust her glasses and Lexi does the same.

A fidgeting chain reaction Lena likes to call it.

“I don’t think so? I mean we’ve been dating for over a year!”

Kara looks like she wants to say something but Lena’s hand on her shoulder stops her.

“I’m sure she has a perfectly good explanation for why she didn’t tell us.”

“Lee, our little girl got married and didn’t tell us! What’s a good explanation for that?”

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Married?!

“What?!” She hopes the shock she feels is evident on her face, because there’s a lot of it.

“We talk everyday.” Her ieiu looks so sad, and Lexi feels a pang of guilt, even if she isn’t sure what she did to cause it. “I just thought you would tell me about something this big. I mean, even if I don’t approve of your timeline, Taylor is a nice girl -“

Lexi knows that interrupting isn’t polite manners, but sometimes the situation calls for it; such as now.

“Do you - do you think I’m married?”

Her moms look at each other and then back to her.

“You exchanged bracelets.”

Suddenly, it all clicks.

“No, no, no, no.” She paces the floor, wringing her hands. “We didn’t exchange bracelets.”

“No?” Her ieiu looks a little less hurt, but the trademark crinkle is still there.

“No! She just gave me this bracelet, for my birthday, because that’s what human girlfriends do sometimes. Definitely not- I mean she doesn’t even know the Kryptonian tradition of giving bracelets, and even if she did, we’re not - I mean, I love her but - I’m not ready for that? And I would definitely talk to you guys about it first.”

“See, I told you there would be a perfectly good explanation.” Her Mama says, looking at her ieiu admonishingly.

“I’m sorry,” Kara says, relaxing, and Lexi can feel her stress level go down. "I freaked out, you’re just growing up so fast and I just worry that we aren’t as close as we used to be.”

“I wouldn’t get married without telling you! And I certainly wouldn’t get married at 19!”

“Good, because I would hate to have to ground you.” Lena warns her teasingly.

“You can’t ground me at university.” Lexi laughs as she tugs on her loafers.

“Mmm, don’t tempt me Lexington Luthor-Danvers, I know the Dean.”  

Lexi can’t help but roll her eyes at that.

“You know everybody, Mom.”

“Exactly, which is why we have reservations at the new Italian restaurant you’ve been, quote, ‘dying to try’. Reservations that we’re going to miss if you don’t hurry up.”

“I’m ready! Unless you guys want to give my present now … “ She trails off, gazing up at them hopefully.

“Ha! Nice try. After dinner.” Kara shoo’s her out the door and the three of them head down the hall.

“I can’t believe you thought I got married without telling you.”

“It’s your mom’s fault, she wouldn’t let me stop for a snack - you know how irrational I get when I’m hungry.”

“You ate an entire pizza right before we left National City!”

“So I haven’t eaten anything in almost two hours! I’m probably delusional at this point.”

Lexi can’t help but grin and shake her head as they board the elevator. She may not be married yet, but she knows exactly what she wants it to look like when she does.

“Speaking of food,” Lena says excitedly, "I’ve heard this restaurant has a Tuscan kale to die for.”

“Aww,” Kara leans into give Lena a kiss and Lexi rolls her eyes, turning to stare pointedly at the door. "I think it’s adorable how excited you get over something that tastes so nasty.”

Yep.

She definitely wants it to look like that.

Because later that night, she knows Kara will end up with a giant plate of kale.

And three servings of lasagna, of course; but isn’t that what marriage is all about? Compromise?

                     Fun fact, Lexi started college early - which is why she’s about to graduate with a double major at 19, and she also has a single person dorm room because having a mom who is a billionaire tech genius CEO has it’s perks!

And also I kinda struggled with this chapter because I’m so used to writing Lena POV, so let me know what you think! I might end up doing more Lexi POV chapters if ppl like them