#harley is absolutely blessed

[love-toxin]

Cattle -> Harley Kunuk

plot: a world in which the realm of monsters & yanderes has merged--that's the au you find yourself in as a low-producing cow hybrid. you've never impressed any master as working cattle, always cast aside in favour of prettier, more talented cows. that might change once you get dropped off at the wrong farmer's ranch.

(cws: fem!cow hybrid!reader, chubby+naive reader, yandere themes, explicit smut, lactation, fondling, dry-humping, chest worship, dirty talk/soft degradation, clothed sex/cumming in pants, kinda monsterfucking, power dynamics, reader refers to him as 'Mr. Harley')

a/n: welcome to the long-awaited 'harley x cow hybrid reader' saga LOL

wc: 4.7k (art by milove @the-zipper !! <3)

If not for the grace of the gods, you'd surely be thrown into the ditch or to the wolves by now.

The transition between seedy motels has never been easy, sure, but you've reached new lows since your last rancher kicked you to the curb. Besides, nor has having to deal with the treatment from your superiors been easy when most of them see you as nothing but what your brand reads out.

Cattle.

If farm hybrids have anything, it isn't rights–at least not for undesirables like you. There's probably places out there like Runerhéa where you could live in peace, but this new world is even tougher than the last. When the realms merged as one, everyone on the lower side like you thought it would turn out to be a blessing. Maybe you'd finally get a break and wouldn't have to live like a piece of meat. But so far, it's only been a curse.

Ever since you were passed into the hands of these “livestock traders” your life has been absolute hell. Your last master had at least left you be most of the time, preferring to pay attention to his other, better-producing and prettier cattle rather than get on your case for this or that. These guys that have been toting you around since then have been complete nightmares to deal with–they're callous and cruel and they never let you rest properly, they keep you up all hours of the night with their hollering and drinking and gambling on those awful card games.

Yet, even when you were told that your time with them would be coming to an end, you weren't excited about it. Not one bit. How could you be, when you've been surrounded by horrible people saying such horrible things about your abilities? They've called you “moon-face” and mocked your pitiful history as working cattle, to the point that they've joked about re-branding you and making you a sex toy or something instead, because that's probably all you're good for. You can't even moo right, much less make any milk that doesn't taste sour or curdle within minutes. You're totally useless, and whoever your new owner is, he's quickly going to come to that realization too. Your handlers have been quick to remind you of that, just in case you happen to pick up some worth in yourself on the way there.

That's all you've thought for the past three days since you've been here, too scared to come out from the back of your stall for fear that the big, scary farmer with the loud voice is going to yell at you for not turning out to be what he hoped. You heard him arguing with the traders when you were delivered: ”What the hell is this?! I bought a cow, not some girl! Is this a joke? Did Elias put you up to this?” and since then you've cowered in the corner, refusing even to touch the water and food he brought and left at the door for fear he might just poison you to save the trouble of bringing you back. You've never been kept with real farm animals before, yet even now there's not much interaction you have with them. The big guy put you in a stall far away from his other animals, probably because he thinks you might infect them or something. It's always something with you.

Thunk. Thunk. Thunk. You've been hearing those noises from outside for the last two days, the sounds of wood scraping and hammering pervading your fuzzy ears and filling your mind with all manner of horrors that might await you. Is he building some kind of horrible torture machine? A rack? A device to forcibly milk you? Oh, that thought sends a chill down your spine. Or is he simply building your coffin? It could be any one of those possibilities or many, many more horrible ones, and it leaves you to tug your floppy ears down and try to block out the noise as you cry softly. I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die, even if I'm bad at being a cow. I just wanna live another day.

You pull the scratchy woolen blanket he left in here closer around your shoulders, hoping and praying with your head bowed that this won't be the end. With the clunk of the barn's door sliding open, with every step you hear thudding closer and closer towards your stall, you tremble harder and hurriedly wipe your tears dry while you pray to the Deity to shelter you from an early grave.

Kh-chunk. The clasp on your stall comes undone from the other side, and with bated breath, you watch as the door rolls open and lets in the streams of light you'd forgotten existed in this endless darkness.

“...Oh.” The farmer utters his surprise softly, his brow easing up as he looks you over. He's perched at the entrance to your stall still, not quite ready to cross the threshold yet. Maybe he's still trying to prepare himself as he sizes you up for the slaughterhouse. “You look…cold.”

You shake your head meekly and throw off the blanket. Straws of hay flutter about your knees as you do so, some of it already stuck in your hair and your meager clothes that don't cover enough for him not to blush and avert his gaze. “Uh…c'mon. We need to move you somewhere else.” He meekly produces a harness from his overalls, but it sits lightly in his hand like he's not really keen on using it. “It'll be safe. C'mon.”

If you weren't a lowly, domestic cow hybrid, one of the very lowest of the monster hybrid species, you'd be tempted to ask if he's always this awkward. He can't even look at you, he barely even breathes once you finally stand and skirt past him out of the stall. And he doesn't dare to touch you as he leads you out of the barn even though you're his property–it's like he doesn't even see you as cattle, but as…you don't even know what.

At the very least, despite the uncertainty around your new home, the first deep breath of fresh air as you step outside reminds you of the home you knew in childhood. Rolling grass in a sea of green, woods out across the field that are far from predators, safe fences and even a big, old farmhouse on the lawn that gives you a sense of homey nostalgia. As big and scary as he looks, maybe he's not so bad after all…maybe, as long as you do everything to appeal to him, he might treat you like nice cattle and not the nuisance you've long been defined as.

As you step out onto the grounds, the farmer introduces himself as Harley. He waits while you sniff around the fresh, clean air a bit before leading you around the side of the barn–that's where a small, shed-like attachment has been built on to the side of the structure, which opens into a surprisingly comfy and spacious area that he must have put together in a hurry. The floorboards have a nice rug over them and there's a soft, downy mattress in the corner on a little frame, and it's all built in and warm like it's an actual room. But when you turn to Harley with a quizzical look on your face and he tells you it's yours, you don't even know how to respond. So you just look at him blankly.

“It's…yours, y'know? It's, uh, like your…bedroom, I guess.” He looks around the space and rubs the back of his sweaty neck, seemingly sheepish about the simple construction even though you're standing there dumbfounded. “I didn't think you'd wanna live in the barn with the animals, but, uh, you wouldn't come in the house. So…yeah.” The silence between you is agony up until he just huffs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Listen, this isn't ideal for me. I don't deal well with people, and you're…sort of one, I guess. To be honest, I hate the idea of sharing my farm with some stranger.” He sighs and runs a hand through his dark hair, incidentally messing up his long ponytail that's just barely keeping all that thick hair tied up. With his hands set on his hips, he looks you dead in the eyes in a way that makes you cower at his sternness. “But you're here now, so whatever. Just behave yourself–and if some guy in a cowboy hat comes around, make yourself scarce. I don't want him messing with my-” He catches himself, but in your bovine wisdom you finish his sentence for him.

“Cattle?”

Harley swallows dryly and nods. “...Cattle. Yeah.” In any case despite the awkwardness and the tense air between you, he shows you how to work the little water pump he built the shed around so you can wash up and drink, your bed and blankets, and where to use the bathroom–which he insists you do inside the house, for no reason that he elaborates on other than the fact that you're able to, so you should. With that he leaves you be, letting you sit and ponder this newfound haven that he so casually dropped in your lap.

By the third day in your little mock cabin, six days since you've arrived here, you're pretty sure you've fallen in love with Mr. Harley. He won't tolerate you calling him ‘Master’ because it makes him all red in the face when you say it, so despite him insisting on no formalities at all you've settled on referring to him as ‘Mr.’ Harley.

It's been an easy process to say the least. Mr. Harley is gruff and speaks bluntly, but he never lays a hand on you and has never called you any mean names. He feeds you more often than he does his other animals, and despite getting annoyed and scolding you if you don't eat like you didn't the first three days, he's always gentle and doesn't yell or kick things over when he's mad. Plus, he treats his other farm animals real nice–you've heard him cooing and calling them by their names when he pets them, and most of them come running or perk their ears up when they hear his voice from far away. One of the chickens even tried to peck you when Mr. Harley was showing you around, and had his hand on your arm as he showed you how to feed them. They love him so much they even get jealous, and it's easy to see why. Mr. Harley is so caring and kind-hearted. He's got pretty brown eyes and such a low, deep voice, and big muscles, and soft hair, he's more handsome than any other master or trader you've come across in your whole life. It's no wonder you've fallen in love with Mr. Harley.

Where it's becoming an issue, however, is with your milk.

The first little while you were here, Mr. Harley didn't even make a mention about your production. There wasn't any bucket around for you to show him anyways, so you've been sitting around letting the milk build up and up and up until you're sore and swollen. The only reason you're sat in your shed with a bucket in your lap now is because Mr. Harley noticed your discomfort (because he's such a nice and caring farmer…) but, with you being too worried about your quality and Mr. Harley being too red-faced to stick around and watch, you're coming up on the end of the day without a drop to show for it. If you don't give him anything, he'll think you're a disobedient cow! But if you squeeze out your milk and it tastes sour, or makes him sick…oh, you couldn't bear to think of making Mr. Harley hate you with the taste of your milk. It's quite the dilemma that you have no easy way of getting out of, so you do what's likely the better option: you milk out just enough to make the swelling go down, but not so much that the taste will be too strong if it's bad.

But even with your clever thinking, your knees shake as you perch on your bed and listen to the big, thudding footsteps of Mr. Harley coming towards the shed. The moment the door slides open you spring into action, and pick up the bucket a quarter full of milk to hand to him, hoping beyond hope that he won't be upset over how little there is.

“..Huh.” After he jolts slightly at your sudden movement toward him, Harley glances down at the bucket and back up at you as he takes it gingerly, peering down at the milk as if it's some sort of magic that you've managed to fill it even as little as you did. He raises his hand and your instincts force you to flinch, your eyes squeezing shut as you anticipate a hit or something equally awful. But the moment passes because Mr. Harley pats your head instead, stroking your hair and your fuzzy ears gently before hiking up the bucket to grab and hold it by the handle. “Good girl.”

Good girl? Are those words for real? Was that…praise? And so easily given, at that?

You're practically on your knees by the time he steps out of the shed, they're so wobbly and weak, but before he can make it outside he halts and turns back to you. “So…” He lingers at the doorway, the bucket hanging from his closed fist. “...Where does your milk come from, exactly?”

Oh. That's…hard to explain. You had a sense that Mr. Harley already knew, but then again he owns farm animals, not hybrids. So you meekly point at your own chest in answer, and Harley's reaction takes you by complete surprise.

“...You're shitting me.” He breathes out in what comes off as disgust, but is really shamefaced embarrassment as he tries to avert his eyes but can't tear his gaze off of your…well, udders. It was obvious that they were impressive, but he clearly wasn't expecting such a blunt and simple answer. Harley clears his throat and tries to get something out, but sooner than he's able to he gives up and just wishes you a good sleep as he shuts the sliding door behind him.

The rest of that night is full of whimpers and soft cries throughout the shed as you weep out all your worries. Mr. Harley doesn't like me anymore! He thinks I'm gross! You sniffle into your tear-drenched pillow as the thoughts grow so loud in your head that they overwhelm you. In time, you cry yourself so dry that you can't help but drift off, your sleep peppered with bad memories and anxious nightmares of what Mr. Harley might do with you tomorrow, now that he's seen how worthless and disgusting you really are.

Though by now you're used to the rooster's screeching to wake you up, your morning is riddled with half-awake mumbles and drool caking your pillow as you try to remember what you were doing. It's not until you rub your eyes and look around that you notice the light filling the shed, and realize with a cold twist in your belly that it's almost midday and well past the time you should've been up and about. The sounds of Mr. Harley's boots in the barn next door rattle you out of your covers and up to your feet, your knees knocking and hands shaking as you try to figure out what to do.

Mr. Harley always comes by your shed to check on you after he's done with the animals, and by the whinnying of the horses as he sprays the hose you can tell he's just about finished up with filling their water trough. And if that's what he's up to now, that means you're next–and gods know what he's gonna do now that he doesn't think you're cute anymore! You're not sure now if he would kill you, or chop you up to sell your bits in some underground meat market, but he might give you back to the traders! You can't let that happen, you can't!

Little do you know that while you've bustled around your shed in a panic trying to figure out what to do, Harley has been pacing anxiously outside the barn doors before finally slamming them shut and heading towards you. Each step rings out like thunder. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump-

The door to your shed slides open, eliciting a startled shriek from your lips as you drop the bucket. It clatters to the ground and rolls to a stop just by Mr. Harley's boot. The two of you lock eyes and he utters a string of words that totally throw you for a loop.

“You had trouble getting your milk out yesterday, so I'm gonna help you.”

The air that hangs between you is heavy once he says that, pierced only by the gentle clinking of the bucket's thin wire handle as he reaches down and plucks it up off the hay-scattered ground. Harley rubs the back of his neck and clears his throat, his steps taken slow and quietly as he slides the door shut behind him and approaches your skittish self.

“You want me to help you?” His voice remains stoic and strong, but when you nod so meekly that your ears twitch his face burns a bright red all the way down to his collar. He coughs into his hand and asks you to move into a comfortable position while he stands awkwardly and prepares himself for what's about to come. You can barely make eyes with him in the meanwhile, every bit of you is trembling as you sink down to your knees.

Mr. Harley sets the bucket down beneath you. The soft, almost imperceptible thunk rings in your ears like a dinner bell. A thought flashes over your head and you wonder if you should get on your hands and knees–but the shame of such a position quickly overcomes whatever else would compel you to do so, and you sit quietly and patiently with your ears flicking nervously in rhythm with your tail. He gets down on one knee and mutters something in your ear to soothe you, but you can barely hear anything over your own breathing as you try to will your heart into slowing down from its fervent pace. When he asks you to pull down your top, however, you certainly hear that command loud and clear.

The moment the fabric swishes down your chest in one clean motion, Harley has a look of utter redness and embarrassment all over his face. He's a bit more composed than yesterday, but he can barely tear his eyes away from them; your udders. They're so soft and weigh so heavy on your torso, it's a surprise you can even lift them up yourself. That's what he thinks, anyways–you can't even comprehend his awe when you're so self-conscious over your nipples pebbling in the drafty air. Your fingernails scrape against each other in a nervous tic while you wait. He has to get prepared, and he warms his hands by rubbing them together; the very action of which sends heat straight to your nethers and a twitch to your soft, fuzzy ears.

“M-My milk doesn't taste good…” You whimper to distracted ears, but still, Mr. Harley holds his hands back from reaching out and he meets your eyes in contemplation. Your worries explode out of you before you can halt yourself. “B-But I'll–I'll try really hard to make it sweet, Mr. Harley!”

To your shock, he just shakes his head. He scoffs, but then–then it's a chuckle. It's laughter, low and gravelly, but it's laughter all the same.

“You taste good.” Mr. Harley murmurs, and his eyes don't look at all daunted. He doesn't correct himself, either. He leans closer, reaches out, and then the callused pads of his hardworking fingers are brushing under the tender skin of your breasts.

The moment is…saccharine. It's divine. It's godlike! You can't see, can't hear, can barely breathe, and you've never felt more exuberance bubbling up in the back of your throat–you want to scream and cry and beg but the emotions jumble themselves all together and leave you stunned silent. You can hardly let out the gentlest exhale of disbelieving breath as Mr. Harley's hands fold over your chest, and you feel a warmth you thought was only reserved for cows of a much better pedigree than you. The man that's bigger and stronger and sweeter than you shuffles in closer, he wants his lips right against your skin; he wants to taste you and touch you while he gives you a squeeze, and when his tongue flicks out to dab the sweat off your neck you could just cry, it feels so exhilarating.

“M-Mr. Harley-” You gulp, your tone betraying your enjoyment in how it trembles with desperate need. Harley's hands start pressing and pulling on each teat, and in no time at all he's coaxing the milk from you as easily as he would his own dairy cows. No mess, no fuss, and no tears–not ones devoid of joy, anyways. You can't help your own instincts in this moment of pure, primal hybrid heat. “I-I love you, Mr. Harley.”

His head raises and tilts down to look at you. He doesn't even have to look to make sure he's getting it all in the bucket, he's so experienced. Something seems to brew behind those dark, cocoa-coloured eyes…and his words stir up the heat within you like a potent, bubbling love potion.

“I'm so fuckin’ glad they got you mixed up.”

With that admission of very Harley-like affection, he buries his tongue in your mouth and presses your lips firmly together in a wet, forceful kiss.

A kiss! From Mr. Harley! Your tail flicks to and fro with happiness while you're melting into it, into the softness and the strength of his tongue and the sticky wetness of your spit mixing with his. You've never been kissed like this, and when he pulls back you just have to lean in for more. He can barely stifle his lustful chuckles when you keep pecking his lips like a touch-starved harpy, hoping for more tongue and spit and warmth. He squeezes your left teat especially firm and a thick jet of milk spurts out, leaving you to hunch forward suddenly as a wet spot starts forming in the seat of your poor panties. Harley's slanted nose is the only thing keeping you up; he nuzzles it under your chin when your body threatens to pitch forward into the hard ground.

“So close.” He murmurs into your mouth as he seals his lips over yours again. His hair is mussed and he's blushing…a lot. “Almost there. Such a good product today. Nearly filled the whole pail. Good girl.” He whispers against your cheek as you try not to feel the delicate rumbles of his voice in your cunt. With a swish of movement, Mr. Harley maneuvers around your trembling body to slot himself up behind you, and lets his hands reach around you just so his thick, muscly biceps will keep you upright through to the end.

“M-Mr. Harley…I think I'm…I-I dunno, I feel-ah! Ah, weird. G-Good weird..” What feels like a brick presses up against your rear in that moment–you have a feeling you know exactly what it is.

“Yeah?” He scoffs with a thrilled smirk against your neck. “Dirty fuckin’ dairy cow. That's what you are, huh?”

“Y-Yes-!” You squeal, but whether that's an answer to his question or simply the reaction he's caused by bucking against you with a groan, it remains to be seen. Either way Mr. Harley is enjoying himself, and it floods your bovine head with vindicated glee that your master enjoys you. You're doing a good job. You're a good cow.

“Good fuckin’ cow,” Harley growls, completely lost in the softness between your thighs and the sweet warmth of your tits weighing heavy and milk-swollen in his hands. Your legs shake against his thick thighs as he pulls you back to practically sit on his lap, held up by the monster straining at his pants, begging to be let out. You've already left a soiled, sticky spot there through your clothes but Harley won't take any apologies–not right now, at least, when your milk is flowing at its peak and he's just about to lose his self-control completely…if he even had any left from the moment he held your soft, chubby body in his hands. A splash of milk jets from your swollen tits and splatters against the side of the pail rather than inside it, and with that you don't need to see Mr. Harley's face to know that he's reaching his end; in fact, he's already there.

A string of “fuck, fuck, fuck!”s erupts from his mouth that he buries in the juncture of your neck and your shoulder, his teeth not only grazing now but biting down hard into your sweat-soaked skin. The spot you'd left on his jeans is nothing compared to the damp mess he makes as his thighs shake beneath yours, his hips ruthless and powerful as he slams them up into you with the desire of chasing that invaluable heat between your legs. You've barely held back from spasming in pleasure this whole time, but once Mr. Harley has his needs sated is when you finally allow yourself to give in to yours. Groans, panting, and soft mooing resonate within the homey little room that you've incidentally turned into a den of pleasure. Mr. Harley finally slumps back with his arms tucked tightly around your middle, and a wobbly, satisfied smile makes its way across your face as you look down and see a pail full of warm, creamy-looking milk. A few spots and tiny puddles litter the hay-covered ground around it from where you spilled, and some still soaks Harley's massive hands, but you still managed to fill it–a whole bucket!

“I did…a good job, Mr. Harley?” You ask in such a sweet, timid voice that he can only manage a breathless scoff in response.

“You think you did a good job?” He asks, but not understanding his tone, you start to fuss and squirm in fear that you've disappointed him. It's only once he manages to wrangle you against his chest and pick you up off your feet with him that he manages to calm you down.

“Relax, little one. You did a good job.” Careful not to let you lose balance, he sets you down on your feet and holds you there, steadying you against his effortlessly strong body. The moment you look up at him with those sweet, wet cow eyes, he can't resist his affections and lovingly strokes your ears. “Very good. You're a good cow. Look at all the milk you made,” He reaches past you to pick up the pail and hold it out for you to see. The glistening milk swishes with the heft of the bucket, so he steps away and ensures he sets it aside amongst the empty ones to keep it from spilling over.

“So…c-can I stay, Mr. Harley?”

It seems your voice does more than earn you an answer from him–Harley whips around to look at you with a dumbfounded expression on his face, and his reaction is more than you ever could have thought you deserved.

“Stay? What d'ya mean, ‘stay’? You're part of the farm. You're my family now. You're not going anywhere.” He reaches out for you and in that moment it takes for him to get to you, the tears are already flowing and you're blubbering pathetically into his chest with gratitude, which he seems much less awkward in accepting now.

“Hey–quit sayin’ such stupid shit. Stay…are you crazy?” He murmurs into your hair, his arms so tight around you you're reminded of the soreness of your hollow chest as your tits press up against his firm body. What he whispers to you then, in the silence peppered only by your weepy cries of adoration and love for your ‘Mr. Harley’, is the one thing that will stay with you for a long, long time–perhaps for the rest of your life.

“Not just cattle anymore, little one. You're…mine.”

[qibsichan]

“I POSSESS A QUESTION, ONE ASKED OF MY PEOPLE. I AM BLESSED TO HAVE BEEN BROUGHT TO LIFE SURROUNDED NOT BY HERETICAL HUMANS BUT BY THESE "SMALLER BODIES". THEY HAVE WELCOMED ME TO THEIR QUARTERS.”

There's a new toy on board! Introducing BigNap! (Unless a more eloquent name is suggested!)

Sarificed for research and condemned to an unsustainable body, Theodore Grambell's old body has melted away at the hands of Miss Delight and Harley Sawyer. His mind has been reignited in a different vessel - one twelve feet tall and with the power to tear a school bus in half.

But it's alright, because while BigNap may be vengeful and venomous, he's quite the dear little kitty to those dang Smaller Bodies in the Playcare.

So much so that he's introduced in the very first chapter of Destroy-A-Toy! It's underway!

Now, Bigger Bodies Catnap's question is:

(He asks because his debut is in the very first story for DAT and therefore his formatting must be worked out.)

How This Creature Works

Big Catnap, as colloquially named by the Critters, children and teachers of the Playcare, is the new-and-improved replacement for that old, faulty thing who cried too much. He is twelve feet tall and an absolute tank - if you ignore the protruding ribcage and ominous growling stomach.

Appearance

The same as the Catnap found in the original Poppy Playtime. Big Catnap is a large, scrawny creature with a protruding spinal chord and disconcerting slices of ribcage jutting from his paper-thin skin. His eyes are minuscule and set deep into mouth-like sockets. His fur is abyssal-dark felt soft to the touch.

Deep inside his throat, if one were to look, pipes could be found. Who knows what they produce?

Personality

Quiet, docile and allegedly "friend-shaped" (according to my friend Foxfire), this Catnap looks like he can kill you but is in fact a cinnamon roll. At least, to people he likes. Otherwise you can expect yourself to be on the plate.

BigNap is possessive over the Playcare children and loving towards toy experiments - but has a VERY strong hostility to humans. This is an issue because of the upcoming Toy Tour…

Theodore gasses the children not out of obligation but out of concern for their health and sleep.

Biology

A creature of this size requires LOTS of food. The problem is - he isn’t given the correct amount. Why drain resources for an experiment that may not survive anyway? As such, Big Catnap is constantly just one bite off from a full belly.

His tank possesses MUCH greater quantities of poppy gas - however, it’s watered down. The gas:

Takes up to 10 minutes to knock out children and 30 for adults

Does not leach oxygen

Works slowly but surely to lull the victim to sleep

This is NOT how Smaller Bodies Catnap works. Her smoke is quick-working and oppressive while this Catnap works much more as a calm, steady, peaceful lull to sleep.

-🌟🌙✨-

[letmebeyourcrrsh]

۶ৎ 100 Things that I love about I.N ₊ ⊹

His beautiful dark fox eyes ₊ ⊹

How his eyes shape into a crescent moon when he smiles ₊ ⊹

His smile that fills everyone around him with happiness ₊ ⊹

The cute cute dimples ₊ ⊹

I am weird for that but his eyebrows are just perfect ₊ ⊹

The form of his lips is just so beautiful ₊ ⊹

His nose being so adorable ₊ ⊹

Every single hairstyle and color he had.. He ate them all ₊ ⊹

As a person who loves hands.. His big hands! ₊ ⊹

His legs ₊ ⊹

How he decorates his hands with different rings ₊ ⊹

Him being a literal fashion icon. His style is so UGH ₊ ⊹

How he said that he doesn’t buy extremely expensive clothes on purpose, so stay could match with him ₊ ⊹

Even his funny taste in shoes… It just makes him so unique ₊ ⊹

The times when he had braces ₊ ⊹

The fact that he removed his braces on January 17th… my birthday.. ₊ ⊹

His voice being so soft and light. A music to my ears ₊ ⊹

His vocals in general. He is so amazing in singing! ₊ ⊹

When he laughs like HEUGH HEUGH ₊ ⊹

His duality.. How he can go from baby bread to daddy toast is insane ₊ ⊹

How clumsy he is ₊ ⊹

How bad but cute he was in dancing in debut times.. now look at those body rolls! ₊ ⊹

Talking about dancing.. I love hallucination… ₊ ⊹

The vibe in the maknae on top music video! He showed em all who is the boss ₊ ⊹

How this man loves kids ₊ ⊹

His height ₊ ⊹

I really love his Instagram username i.2.n.8 ₊ ⊹

Just as I absolutely go crazy over the aesthetic of each post of him! ₊ ⊹

His English name being bob… I seriously laugh at that. Don’t get me wrong tho I literally LOVE BOB. It does suit him in some way ₊ ⊹

Foxi.ny ₊ ⊹

Each and everytime I hear him singing trot ₊ ⊹

That one time he made a “mistake” in kingdom. When he got so disappointed he cried about it all by himself.. I wish I could have given him a hug ₊ ⊹

His 7 if not more step skincare routine ₊ ⊹

I heard his hair smells the best out of all members… I want his shampoo ₊ ⊹

His baby pictures giving extremem baby fever ₊ ⊹

His story of when he ran away as a little boy… because he asked his parents where he came from. And his father said he found him under a bridge. So little innie ran off on his adventure to find his “ real “ parents ₊ ⊹

His livestreams are my comfort zone ₊ ⊹

When he talks in English. Its so mimimi ₊ ⊹

His face expressions in performances ₊ ⊹

How evil he can be towards his members ( when they try to touch him and he pushes em away or gives them disturbed faces. Its so funny but so real ) ₊ ⊹

How he often bites on his lip when he zones out ₊ ⊹

His habit of touching his earlobe ₊ ⊹

His vlogs feel like home ₊ ⊹

How his sign looks like a fox and not his name or something ₊ ⊹

Him skipping school is so me ₊ ⊹

How shy he can sometimes be ₊ ⊹

How I trust him as if I know him personally.. I need to touch grass ₊ ⊹

When he pouts I want to give him the whole world ₊ ⊹

His memeable face pictures ₊ ⊹

That he loves animals especially puppies ₊ ⊹

How he locks his negative feelings in him and then often randomly explodes. Randomly cries it out for example literally just when eating ( said in one of the two kids rooms I think ) why I love that? I don’t. because its actually not really a great thing. It hurts. But I just relate to that very much. I am JUST like that. ₊ ⊹

His phone cases ₊ ⊹

That one time he looked like Harley Quinn₊ ⊹

That one time he stared at Hyunjin jaw dropped. Blessed by Hyunjins beauty. That is exactly how I stare at I.N ₊ ⊹

Not as an insult, because to some people its an insult. But he is so drawable! I LOVE drawing him ₊ ⊹

His grandma behavior sometimes. The inner grandma in him is FUNNY af. He slayed grandma ayen in skzcode ₊ ⊹

SKZ Family where he was the gen z girl. Bro was such a hot girl he ATE ₊ ⊹

How hardworking he is! ₊ ⊹

His “ Anti Romantic “ personality. When he goes “ IdOlS dOn’t DatE MiMimI “ or makes judgy faces when stays flirt. That’s so wholesome fr. But we all real stays wouldn’t mind him actually dating. His happiness is what matters ₊ ⊹

His talent of tying his shoes in 0.0001 seconds ₊ ⊹

The fact that he knows how to skateboard ₊ ⊹

His ability to play on the piano. I want to hear more of that ₊ ⊹

HE LOOKS SO UGH when he drives. Drive me to work everyday please ₊ ⊹

If you know that then you are real. When he says “ oh honeeeey! Mwwwwwah “ ₊ ⊹

Him being friends with Beomgyu and Heeseung makes me happy as an multistan ₊ ⊹

Each and every solo song of him. And I cant live without untitled by I.N and hyunjin ₊ ⊹

DOLPHIN SCREAM! ₊ ⊹

Random but also his face when he does NOT smile and looks pretty serious. Whoever said he looks scary when he doesn’t smile. I am after you ₊ ⊹

That one video where he gets slapped by two girls when he was still in school and before SOPA. And instead of acting as if it hurts or something. He just was grinning like some maniac. Dude enjoyed the fake slapping ₊ ⊹

His lines in N/S where he sings about loving his parents ₊ ⊹

How did they even convince him to “ moan “ for N/S in the background?! But that too ₊ ⊹

I am fox ₊ ⊹

When he laughs his soul out. There is difference between normal laughing. And laughing SOOOOO loud. Well I love it when he laughs SO LOUD I automatically giggle too ₊ ⊹

How random he sometimes is ₊ ⊹

Any trend he does and any reel they post with him in it ₊ ⊹

The fact that he has siblings. Its just great to me because life with siblings is cool ₊ ⊹

How he drinks water from a bottle. So hot ₊ ⊹

His mooscles and abs… ₊ ⊹

How he himself said in an interview that he wants a HOT album ₊ ⊹

When he wears glasses and pokes his eyes ₊ ⊹

When he does a heart out of his hair ₊ ⊹

That one time he literally followed a stranger home to pray together and almost joined a cult just because of how naïve he was… Idiot but I love how it turned out good ₊ ⊹

His little voice cracks sometimes ₊ ⊹

Even his mistakes. He gets so hurt about it but we all are humans ₊ ⊹

Even his Birthday date looks beautiful to me. I am sorry I need grass again ₊ ⊹

How he sucks at cooking. I relate ₊ ⊹

How hes so clumsy that members tend to help him before he breaks or ruins something ₊ ⊹

The way I feel when I see him. Comfortable and relaxed ₊ ⊹

The happiness I have when I pull him in an album ( I rarely get him!! ) ₊ ⊹

That one time he judged the lyrics of I Like It because he finds it toxic ₊ ⊹

Him liking Pokemon ₊ ⊹

When I find lots of pictures where he is holding an eevee plushie. My favorite Pokemon ₊ ⊹

His doodles of each member ₊ ⊹

Him liking winter ₊ ⊹

When he gets mad in skz codes. He looks so sweet ₊ ⊹

His relationship with Hyunjin. I love their friendship ₊ ⊹

Him in a SKZOO costume. Id want him as a plushie like that ₊ ⊹

His fox like sneezes agh.. ₊ ⊹

His big heart ₊ ⊹

Literally just him whole!! Hes perfect even if he isn’t perfect!  ۶ৎ

I know I.N will never see this.. but i hope one day he will know that letmebeyourcrush/eve loves him a lot and is proud of everything I.N ever did!

[stocious]

oh hey look who has the spoons to do a tag game again? this bitch! thank you @jrooc and @energievie for tagging me (and everyone else whose tagged me these past weeks/months/whatever... spoons, ya know).

Name: i've grown weirdly fond of jamez. thanks comet. (it's kaka though. but jamez is cool too now i guess).

Age you are mentally: forever a 20-something.

Top 3 fics that came out last year (that you can remember at this point lol) : insert ian_think-emote. i barely remember what i was going last week.

Last Night at the Verona Hotel by @the-rat-wins

Wanna go again? by @wehangout

The Harley Quinn/Joker series by sunsetsomewhere (i will not take further questions)

Add in any authors who you read all of their things: @whatthebodygraspsnot, cryme_anocean, @wehangout, @goodkwuestion etc etc etc.

Fave artist/band/singer/group your discovered last year (has to be new to you, not new): sleep token and archers.

One thing you learnt last year that you're taking into 2025: oh hey, look who's slowly learning how to battle the brain demons.

Was is a good year or bad year? eh, it was kinda meh you know? not bad nor great, just kinda... in the middle.

Is there anything superstitious you do to try and continue that vibe or absolutely change it? nooot really no.

Fave WIP your following into this year: i haven't been keeping up properly, i'm sorry D:

Can't Have a Stakeout by @lazystargazy

Are you doing any January 'get healthy' things? well, does actually cooking my own meals count? because i'm cooking again. look at me go!

Did you consider yourself an avid reader before you found fanfic? you know i read a lot as a kid and then i didn't read anything for years and then came fanfic. i haven't touched an actual book in years though.

Do you read books as well as fanfic? Yes or No: i did read two published books recently. it was very underwhelming. god bless all our telented fic writers. i have been spoiled. but no.

What are you doing to survive this January so far? i've been getting lost in tv series lately. i finally finished lost and now i'm working my way through desperate housewives as you do 🫡

tag you're it!

@deathclassic @sgtmickeyslaughter @mybrainismelted @femboymilkovich @transmurderbug

@deedala @callivich @spookygingerr @spacerockwriting @creepkinginc

aaand anyone else

[pain-is-too-tired]

Is my main otp still Jake/Michael, yes

Do I 100% see the appeal of Percy/Michael tho?

Oh without a doubt.

1. Their ship name could be Mercy, which is exactly what you be begging for if you mess with both of them-

2. Percy is absolutely devastated when Michael isn't on the bridge, and the fact that Rick just drops that emotion afterwards is so dumb.

That boy was ready to call Blackjack,until he knew Annabeth needed medical help severely he was ready to search every nook and crany for Michael. Even if seeing it as platonic, he obviously cares for Michael. Especially if they been working together in any fashion since the previous summer. I mean Percy just shoves Michael at one point and we don't even hear a complaint. Gods bless them.

Like, both Charles and Silena's death continue to weigh on not just the rest of the book they died in, but also leaking into the next book.

But Michael, who literally sacrifices himself to stop Kronos advancing as well, doesn't even get any scene where anyone outside of Percy is clearly distraught. Breaking the bridge was his idea. He was ready to fight Kronos with just one arrow. Give us people grieving for him Rick- please 😭

3. They would both be too much sass/attitude for the gods to handle. Real reason Michael was killed/j

Anyway. We were at least robbed of their friendship. They'd be absolute menaces.

Actually, a Jake/ Michael/ Percy/ Annabeth ship in some form is very funny to imagine.

Because Jake gonna be the chillest out of them and gods bless his heart. Michael, Percy and Annabeth gonna somehow start arguing with a god(probably Hera-) and Jake's gonna be in full panic trying to get them to shut up.

Also. So many of the Hephaestus kids are so chill- like I think Leo is the only really chaotic one(I mean, other than Harley. But he's a little kid and idk how much that should count gsgd)

So. Nice. Hephaestus just really have some the coolest kids ironically.

[comicalarchitect]

Samantha Reads Comics: Ivy Drip #2

The first arc of this series absolutely blew me away. Can the book keep up the momentum? Let's find out.

Wait, is that Punchline?

fuck yeah

yes yes yesssssssss more of the good body horror

fucking OWNED

Harley Fucking Gets It

god bless you G. Willow Wilson

normal stuff!

need need NEED

fucking love these abstracting boundary-dissolving surrealist fight scenes from Takara.

[yandere-monoma]

should i be insane and start the kill your masters commentary now

i am gonna be insane and start the kill your masters commentary now

hi this will contain spoilers for the killswitch au which imo is fine because i have no intentions of writing it in its entirety so HSJKFGFG

god. rose strider.

rosie rosie rosie rose strider UUUUUUGH.

fun fact i actually attempted to go off about all this weeks ago but tumblr deleted the fucking draft but now im drunk (or i was drunk when i started this at 1am and now its fuckin noon LMFAO) and trying again so LET'S GO!!!!

so. actually. my iteration of rose strider was first sparked after reading BGB by MermaidMayonaiise oh god bless tf out of them

like, guardianswaps is an ancient concept in the fandom so it's not like i've never considered her or any other strider kid before but GOD. this one line from BGB absolutely blasted through my soul:

You never knew her, but a Rose Strider would have been a killing machine. Considering the multiverse, she exists. Just not in any timeline that matters.

as i lovingly say in the comments of that fic, i literally copypasted that line to every hs friend i know. it drove me crazy

it'd still be a couple of weeks (months?) after reading that fic that i actually conceptualized her, though. rose strider was born via the homestuck renaissance chat which i will reference 6738459634563456 times in this commentary because killswitch would not exist without it. the renaissance chat went off with a million and one headcanons about a million and one different guardianswaps and my impulsive ass couldn't help but actualize them in some sort of written form, complete with ridiculous long ass plot and even a couple of sburb sessions that i'll never write cuz it'll take me years. like. the ideas were just so good.

ironically, our first official swap we discussed was actually john strider, who i hopefully will get to at least allude to in the next iteration of killswitch, along with dave lalonde (WHO I FUCKING LOVE AAAAA), jade egbert and rose harley... then we actually discussed jade before i finally revealed how insane i was about rose strider rose rose rose rose ROOOOOSE

from that first initial outline to the first chapter of kym, it took about two months of plotting and dragging through drafts which is CRAZY cuz it rly does feel like time has fucking flooown by. a lot of that time was also dedicated to the first installment of killswitch, which got interrupted because the third chapter of kyd got tragically deleted and i've never recovered and i only recently healed past the hurt enough to start to rewrite it. god. trauma.

anyway.

before i get to the first chapter, i wanted to talk about rose's initial concept as a strider and what it meant. as i've said 738596356 times already, nature vs nurture was how i approached every placement within the au. it was very important to me to blend every character with who they initially are in canon and who their guardian's influence turned them into. this made for an incredibly fun process that lent itself to a pretty easy formula characterization-wise.

for example, rose strider's excessively extreme experiences with self-harm are born of rose lalonde's early act 1 habit of engaging in empty suicide threats towards her mother. i took that tendency to act out and cranked that fucker up to 11 because there is nothing passive aggressive about how bro raised dave.

every killswitch character features this pairing blend approach to their writing. jake lalonde, for example, inherits roxy's hyperactive silly energy, though he lacks the grace, ease and confidence to carry it out without stumbling. however, rose is especially special because i wasn't just trying to blend rose and dave. because of rose's identity blurring motif, i had to build her up using elements of rose AND dave AND dirk AND, most importantly, bro. that made her, honestly, really fucking hard to write because i still wanted her to be recognizable enough, while still sounding like a carbon copy of bro, simultaneously perfect and flawed all at the same time. and, ngl, it's super interesting to me, the way she deviates from the formula and refuses to follow the easy pattern i followed for literally every other character in the au. it's just so fitting for her to fuck with the meta like that JSKFG

anyway LETS START READING

fucking with the commands was actually a last minute choice done right at the very final edit. so much of the narrative fuckery that happens in kym is very on the spot, lots of last minute decisions that start with the impulse of 'oh shit yknow what'd be cool' and end with a big ole internal ramble of what it could all ~represent~

in this case, i thought this was nifty, i've been using this same one fuckin glitch generator for YEARS at this point: but also, i think it was a fun way to allude to her classpect, even though it's never really discussed outright

yeah see this was actually supposed to be a description of her room but in the very last draft as i was cleaning it up i saw this section that i still had to write and went nope. JHSKFGSDFG which is hilarious to me because doing so literally transformed how i approached the rest of the piece. originally this chapter really was supposed to just be a pretty direct copypaste of act 1, but god. GOD i'm glad it isn't. i've had so much fun with this style and it's so amusing to me that i have laziness to thank for that JKGFG ah yes the creative process

facts about john harley and his first conversation with rose!!

i suck at chumhandles and enlisted help from the renaissance chat for a lot of them. other handle options suggested to me at the time include: garrulousGallivant, groovyGallywag, galleyGaffer, giddyGelogenic (this was in second place to me i rly loved it sob)

(rose's handle was incredibly easy in comparison, largely because i hardly put any effort into it. i just wanted something suitably edgy and what could be edgier than naming yourself after genocide HJGKF)

his initial character premise:

the hardest part about starting the fic where i did is that there was just so much imagined backstory for rose and so little time to actually get to detail with it. the purpose of the first few pesterlogs with john and jade was to establish something that honestly i don't think got as much spotlight in the fic as i would have wanted: the fact that rose strider is a compulsive liar who actually tries her hardest to seem normal to her friends, both out of habitual manipulation and out of a subconscious urge to escape her life. it's an attempt to sprinkle her with the void traits that she clings to at the beginning of her arc (guess what her classpect is >:3) before embracing what she really is, but damn. if i could have, i would've written 100k of cute casual conversation with rose seeming like the sweetest most thoughtful friend in the world, only to reveal what she's really like

anyway! we get to see her make up a life for herself first through john, as she lies about going to school when ngl i don't think she's been since like. idk. the 3rd grade. GJKFLGS

this is always an interesting pesterlog to reread remembering how much i fucked with rose's dialogue jesus christ. i did NOT want her to sound like herself in the rougher drafts. she was honestly just a straight up blend of bro and dave, very casual, very ramble-y, however at the last second, i incorporated a touch of her usual more formal vibe/dialogue. again, because i was blending four different characters rather than two, it was difficult to find a balance i really liked. i definitely got there eventually but. hoo.

ro-stri originally used to copy the punctuation of anyone she spoke to. there are still aspects of this in the current draft, rose plays along and sprinkles more exclamation points in than usual to match john's hyperactiveness despite the fact that she feels like roadkill atm. however, in the end, i thought it was a little too subtle and wanted her to have a more uniform sound to her, rather than disappearing into anyone she encountered.

john harley thinks the funniest possible thing to joke about in the world is the fact that he's pretty much a feral kid who has never touched humanity and thus doesnt know the most basic things. he does this 9356354963 times a day. he loves playing dumb. in truth he's experienced a Lot through movies but sometimes he simply cant resist the urge to pretend he doesnt know what a fork is. jsdkfgsfg he was such a delight to write, jesus christ.

despite rose's attempt to fade into the background a little, all of her friends depend on her massively to fill a hole in their lives, which she ends up using to further manipulate and control the topics of their conversations. for john, he's just so incredibly hungry for what life in the real world is like. so rose fabricates a normal school life for him. and she's not even doing that for him. it's completely coincidental that they both just desire the same thing of each other and ngl i really adore and am fascinated by their dynamic. johnrose fuckin sneaks up on me i SWEAR.

rose calling herself a bishounen is the first hint of her weird gender fuckery. it is a hilarious hint that i'm so very proud of cuz it's so dumb HAHAHJKFS

john's flirtiness towards rose is inherited by (epilogue) jade's sexual promiscuity and slight pushiness towards the people she's attracted to. it also just seemed like so much fun lmfao it rly snuck up on me as i was writing and i couldn't help but go all in once i realized what was happening. like, john really does just find one bad joke (usually at someone's expense) that he really likes and does it over and over and over and OVER cuz so much of the joy for him is knowing that he's the only one fucking laughing and that everyone in the vicinity wants to throttle him. but they can't :P

someone tell me why :B emojis are so cute. the very first time i went >:B as john harley i went oh no because i fell so hard at that point HAHA

jade lalonde!!

can you believe this is the first time i've ever written jade in my life jesus fucking christ

other chumhandle option: tipsyTurvey

rose's canon handle is a pun that fucking murders me every time i acknowledge it and i desperately wanted a cute pun for hers. i am bad at puns. i am so very bad at puns. telekineticTactoe is the first pun i've made in all my decades of living. i am so proud of her fucking handle jesus christ GHJFKGS

something that's fun but also agonizing about pesterlogs like these is, again, i don't really get the chance to explain things. so much show, so little tell, which works out great for the narrative but makes the part of my brain that built up so much of the world pout so much. so i never actually go into detail about the fact that the 'update' jade is working on is to a webcomic that she has picked up and abandoned 87593456 times. this is seen more in her later conversations but one of jade's whole shticks is that she has tens of thousands of hobbies and she can't commit to a single goddamn one. she is absolutely CRUSHED by how much she wants to have a perfectly successful career like her mom. everything she tries just isnt perfect enough and it frustrates her endlessly. she is so so very cute i love herrr

it is SO fun discussing the lalonde issue through someone who is earnest and honest about their feelings and who airs them out the second they feel them. it's so fun to interpret some of the issues rose perhaps had with her mother, while also just poking at issues i think would have just. always bothered jade because of the type of person she is. she is going to be an incredibly fun perspective to write through the rest of the au and i rly hope i can figure out a way to focus a fic on one of her iterations one day

jade having a having a habit of traumadumping and rambling was supposed to be a play on just how excessively wordy rose can be. idk how much that shows (people associate rambling way more with dave imo) but either way it was super fun to write

rose's manipulative streaks are more obvious here. jade is incredibly vulnerable and rose jumps at the opportunity to attempt to further isolate and pit her against her mother. she's doing that completely out of habit, too. she has no malicious plan behind it all, it passes the time and it keeps jade close and that's really all she wants. she can see the way jade suffers under the weight of her work and she makes up her own stressful worklife, just so that jade can relate to her more than she can relate to the others.

DAVE FUCKIN EGBERT LET'S GOOO

the first words uttered about dave eggy in the gc:

and what his character ultimately turned into:

there is so much to say about dave i love him i love him i love him let's gOoooOooOOo

first off, i wanna explain why he's an egbert rather than a lalonde, since swapping the strilondes is way more common:

dave lalonde would have taken up too much screentime which would not have worked for the fic/verse. he is. god. an INCREDIBLE and fascinating specimen that i need to specifically write 100k about and pairing him with someone like ro-stri would just be a disservice to either of their stories. they simply can not exist together in a way that i would find narratively satisfying because they both just take up too much SPACE. GOD!!!

dave egbert is just cuter LMAO.

i am a dirty dirty multishipper and making him an egbert means i get a version of johndave and a version of daverose all at the same time

(and this doesnt even also allude to the fact that john strider and dave lalonde are also a hugely amusing dynamic like i rly needed the homophobic af angy boy paired with the darling excitable lil femboy ok

but really, my approach to dave is this: as much fun as tragic backstories are, sometimes a really fascinating narrative can be watching someone getting actively traumatized in the present for the very first time. being a bystander to someone you love's suffering, the survivor's guilt of not being the abused one, the overwhelming stress of being someone's sole confidant, the way it feels to be crushed by codependency and forced to witness unrelenting suffering when you are so woefully unprepared to provide proper support. dave just being a normal boy in an incredibly toxic relationship with his first love is just. GOD. so fun to me. so so fun it's honestly one of my fave decisions coming into the fic

there's also something to said about the fact that dave finally gets to experience normalcy and familial love at the expense of his sister taking his role in the narrative. there is a point in the au where the killswitch characters (who i also refer to as the 'zeta' kids) are made aware of their canon counterparts and thinking about what dave eggy will think about dave strider is SO exciting to me

anyway, again: this was a hard pesterlog to incorporate. i needed a quick summary of their dynamic and a quick summary of both of their characterizations: dave egbert being dryer, quieter, more withdrawn and blunt with his words, rose strider being abrasive and quick to anger and almost sadistically playful in the way she immediately seeks to tease and degrade her boyfriend. i also needed to show this without making rose the most unlikeable character this side of homestuck HGJKFGGS. fun fact, so much of how they talk to each other and exist in general is based on the fact that i think both of them just, like. fuckin LIVE on 4chan. rose is a 4chan troll while dave is just, like, a lurker. and i do wish i could have showed that more and showed even more of both the cruller kinds of dialogue rose can dish out and the more weird/fond/playful parts of their dynamic, because to me rose is the type to just constantly drop slurs and insult people and speak in a way that's designed to shock and horrify people and dave was her punching bag as much as he's her stuffed animal, and he's just so in love with all the ways she overwhelms him. he has so much fun trying to just desperately keep up with her and it all just creates this intense atmosphere that he's absolutely addicted to.

like, it's tragic that her talking like this never shows up in the fic itself but alas. alas, alack...

anyway

HOW CAN I FORGET HOW FUNNY DAVE'S HANDLE IS TO ME dave making his whole personality around himself being a npc is so funny to me ok godhjskfg

There is no excusing what must have occurred the previous evening, but there’s no point trying to contend with what happened. 

considering 'what happened yesterday' is a big huge plot point in chapter 2 i'll leave it to the chapter 2 discussion but just know that this is one of my fave part's of rose's characterization that i ALSO mourn its lack of focus in the fic. i think it's present enough but UGH i wish i got to write it so much MOOOORE, DAMN!

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

there were so many versions of this line and this introduction in general HJGKFGS happy with what i settled with

this section was hard because, again, had to quickly establish all the things i wish i could have spent time just slowly building up. i do enjoy how the final product looks, though. one of my favorite styles to utilize is a very compact, slightly minimalistic type of prose that leans

lil cal as a corrupting force is one of my fave hs things in the world it drives me insane to think about, so it was incredibly fun deciding that this was one of the biggest and most important differences between dave and rose is that dave fucking hates lil cal but ro-stri is not scared of puppets :D she loves them :D

When you sleep, if you sleep, your gaze never breaks from his, and you spend your nightmares drowning,

rose having an eternal staring contest with dream cal amuses the hell out of me especially thinking about dave going to derse just to watch in horror. it's also another aspect of that internal soul flaying she keeps forcing herself through, trying to create a perfect ouroboros between herself and what bro has been turned into. trying to fuckin speedrun through her own corruption

gurgles blood.

this next section about all the ways rose attempts to cope with her trauma was so nervewracking to publish. a lot of parts of this fic was but jesus christ. was really worried i'd get flack for a few of the ideas that got tossed out there, but i couldn't remove them even despite that anxiety. there is such a specific vibe to the 00's that i really wanted to incorporate into the fic... just, how it felt to be an absolutely insane teenager, always overwhelmed, constantly abused, and gifted with unadulterated unsupervised internet access to do terrible AWFUL things to. i wanted to depict it because it's what i relate to, what i've experienced, what i've seen and heard from others.

it's also just generally rly important to me to sprinkle darkweb references into as many of my strider fics as fucking possible cuz i know those boys LIVE on it LMFAOHJGKFG

In reality, you have no hobbies your brother hasn’t given you.

short but important: the fact that rose just does not get the opportunity to start creating her own personality like dave does was very important for me to highlight, though it's also not necessarily true. since the narration is filtered through rose's perspective, and rose is the one that is so adamant (especially at this part of the story) that she is a perfect clone of her brother, she skips past the experiences she has where she's strayed from bro's influence.

the end of this chapter was a very fun escalation that i'm very satisfied with. ahh, my killing machine 🥰❣️ how i adore you... now that i think about it, i forgot that originally i really did just want to make a quick oneshot summarizing all of my thoughts on her. as i was writing, the ideas got bigger and bigger, the hcs spiraled more and then my friends in the chat [shakes fist] dropped a huge BOMB of a plotline right into my lap that forced me to extend it way past its original plan but ughsjfgdfg i'm so glad that they did because this is a story that i'm so incredibly proud of godddjksfg

AND THAT'S CHAPTER ONE, STAY TUNED FOR MORE

[harleyjaneroseauthor]

I feel absolutely blessed to be able to share my stories with a community that appreciates my work and supports me! So firstly, Thank You!!

Spells of Tarot & Tragedy is my first release of this year and is the first in the series - the second book Spells of Revenge & Requiem is coming out later this year!

When Mackenzie's mother first disappeared in the forest without a trace, she refused to give up the search. Now ten years on, Mackenzie visits the forest for one last time, only to have her hopes of finding something dashed by the appearance of a mysterious and terrifying beast. But just as it seems that Mackenzie's quest must end in frustration, a stranger arrives in town. An attractive stranger, shrouded in intrigue, revives Mackenzie's determination to find answers, no matter the price. Mackenzie will need all the determination she can muster, as secrets unravel that shake the very foundations of her identity, revealing a past she could never imagine and a future she can't afford to ignore. The only question remaining…Who will stand by her side at the end?

[duckprintspress]

Celebrate World Folktales and Fables Week with 10 of Our Favorite Folktale Collections

This week, March 19th to 25th, is World Folktales and Fables Week! Duck Prints Press is celebrating with two blog posts: today’s, which focuses on the folktales, fables, and myths that influenced us as creators, and tomorrow’s, about our favorite folktale-inspired fiction (queer and otherwise).

Love folktales and fables? Join us now and learn about the ones we love – some you may know, some you may not!

D’Aulaires’ Book of Greek Myths by Ingri d’Aulaire & Edgar Parin d’Aulaire (an inspiration for Shadaras)

The first book that comes to mind is D’Aulaires’ Book of Greek Myths (I had to look up the title, but the cover is burned into my memory). While there may be other collections of fairytales and folklore that struck me, this is one of the first ones I read, and it set the stage for my love of mythology in general.

The True Story of the Three Little Pigs! by Jon Scieszka & Lane Smith (an inspiration for Veronica Sanders)

I remember being really inspired by the genre of “a well-known story told from a different perspective” after reading the Jon Scieszka/Lane Smith books in 2nd grade, like The True Story of the Three Little Pigs. I always really liked thinking about folktales and fables from the POV of the “villain.”

Folktale-Inspired Disney Films (an inspiration for Adrian Harley)

I was a Disney-loving child of the 90s, so I am still unpacking the ways that shaped my view of folk stories, stories as a whole, and the world—and reconciling the positive ways these stories shaped me vs. the harms of the Disney corporation.

The Onion Girl (and other stories) by Charles de Lint (an inspiration for Anonymous)

He did an amazing job of blending American and European folklore with ordinary life in all its highs and lows. I don’t know if I could point to a specific story that’s retelling any one folktale, but I can absolutely point to the author as a whole for his folkloric style and tender exploration of magic, queerness, and being outcast. He helped invent the Mythic Fiction subgenre. The Onion Girl lives in my head rent-free.

Folktales of the Amur: Stories from the Russian Far East by Dmitri Nagishkin (an inspiration for Nina Waters)

A collection of eastern Russian folktales that really had a huge impact on me. 30+ years on from when I read them, I honestly couldn’t relate a single one of the stories, but they burrowed so deep into my psyche that when I imagine “folktales that really mattered to me” the first image that comes to mind is the cover. The art throughout the book is just absolutely gorgeous.

The Rose-Beauty – a Turkish Fairy Tale (an inspiration for Alessa Riel)

This is a Turkish fairytale that impressed me because it was cruel even for a fairytale. It‘s about a young woman who is blessed from birth to grow roses in her hair, cry pearls and grow grass wherever she walks and the cruel fate she is dealt because people are jealous of her gifts. It has a happy ending but only just.

A Tale Dark and Grimm by Adam Gidwitz (an inspiration for Sebastian Marie)

It had a HUGE influence on me as a kid, for two main reasons. One, the events of a lot of European fairytales are told as happening to the same two kids and their parents, which creates a really interesting story structure. Two, it’s unabashedly mean and gory and cruel and well, dark and grim. It says that sometimes people are terrible and sometimes bad things happen to decent people. It’s one of the things that made me want to write fairy tales, or at least stories that are a bit gruesome and meant to be told to children.

The Swan-Maiden – a fairy tale (an inspiration for Alessa Riel)

This is a variant of the selkie tale as far as I can tell, only that the women don‘t turn into seals but beautiful swans. It was the version of the lore I first encountered and the unfairness of the women being forced to marry their captor and abuser and then also being cursed for abandoning the children these men forced onto them always resonated deeply with me.

The Blue Light by The Brothers Grimm (an inspiration for Alessa Riel)

In this fairytale a veteran soldier is unjustly treated by the king and then a witch sets him three challenges. The third one is getting her a blue light from a deep well. He refuses to give her the light and she drops him into the well along with the light. It turns out the light can fulfill wishes. Up to this part the veteran looks like a sympathetic person, but he uses those wishes to have the princess dragged to his room three nights in a row to do his bidding against her will. He is finally found out and sentenced to death for this transgression but manages to escape that fate by using the blue light and he gets the kingdom and the princess to boot. I always found this supremely unfair.

Egyptian Mythology (an inspiration for Dei Walker)

I think one of the first books of folktales, legends, or fairy tales I can remember reading repeatedly is a copy of Egyptian myths and legends I used to get out of my local public library when I was young. It was already an old edition in the 1980s and its pages were yellowed, but I would borrow it regularly and lose myself in the stories of life and (un)death along the Nile.

What are some folktales and fables that have inspired YOU? We’d love to hear about them, and maybe find some classical stories to add to our To Be Read piles!

Who we are: Duck Prints Press LLC is an independent publisher based in New York State. Our founding vision is to help fanfiction authors navigate the complex process of bringing their original works from first draft to print, culminating in publishing their work under our imprint. We are particularly dedicated to working with queer authors and publishing stories featuring characters from across the LGBTQIA+ spectrum. Love what we do? Want to make sure you don’t miss the announcement for future giveaways? Sign up for our monthly newsletter and get previews, behind-the-scenes information, coupons, and more!

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[aldryrththerainbowheart]

Selina Kyle as a parent

Note: Is it weird? Maybe. Will I write it anyway? Absolutely. Listen, there are enough romantic and smutty headcannons about random characters we need more platonic headcannons as well. And before you ask, yes, this is absolutely my reaction to Wayne Family Adventures. Bless that comic.

Side note: I liked Hally Berry's Catwoman, sue me.

Just like Bruce, she's the type to just pick the random feral child from the street and be like, yes you're mine now. Alternatively, you're the one who picks her up from the street, feeds her, and...look you have a mom now.

I headcannon that Selina and her mum had been very close before she passed away. You don't escape it either. Watching cartoons, late-night visits to the grocery store for snacks, shopping sprees, chatting, and snuggling in bed.

Speaking of shopping that woman is a fashion diva and would never miss a chance to give you a makeover.

Ivy and Harley regularly hang out in your apartment. They're your crazy wine lesbian aunties. Despite Selina's protests, they call you Little Siren, as in a member of Gotham City Sirens.

Selina's a fun mom. She lets you do whatever you please and always is down for some fun. The downside of this is that at times you'll have to be the responsible one. Cooking, cleaning, and taking care of dozens of her cats falls to you more often than not.

She becomes less reckless and more hesitant to take more risque heists. Worries about your safety more than she worries about hers.

Actually doesn't want you to become her successor or become a thief in general. When you ask her why she simply tells you that the business of it isn't as cool and glamorous as it sometimes looks. Considering that you had to patch her up many times she climbed through the window you'll have to agree.

If you insist on following her on this path regardless, she's very protective of you and doesn't take any chances. Celebrate every single diamond necklace and ring you've taken.

She'll probably have a very independent parenting style, giving you a chance to make your own choices. She trusts you'll grow and learn your own way. However, if you mess up, she'll let you simmer in it for a while. Selina wants you to be able to think for yourself and form your own way in life.

She may have a problem if you're more needy and dependent and won't be direct about the things you feel and want.

Very open about sex and relationships and is willing to give you any advice you need. Although she may have extensive knowledge in the sex department, when it comes to relationships...well...

You're one of the few people who's allowed to see her at her lowest.

She cares for you more than she'd admit in front of any of her "colleagues".

[br1ghtestlight]

Hi! I wanted to ask if you have any wild headcanons? Like maybe this has no basis in canon (or just a shred of a basis) but you still believe it wholeheartedly? For any fandom you want!

thank you for asking :) idk about wild lol but here are some headcanons that are very niche nobody else has ever thought abt them

zeke's dad lives in the carnie town and works at wonder wharf which is why he was part of the rent strike in season five. living in a trailer makes it easy for zeke's family to move around frequently but bcuz of the lack of personal space zeke spends a lot of time hanging around at jimmy junior's house and sleepovers (which jimmy pesto doesn't LOVE but tolerates)

mentioned before but harley's dad god bless him does NOT know how to do her hair which results in her mostly wearing very simple hairstyles, when she's a bit older she learns how to style her own hair and loves doing crazy hairstyles like braiding beads into her hair or bantu knots which everybody at school thinks is very impressive and cool. she also experiments with hair dye and it goes Not Very Well

tina is gayle's favorite niece/nephew and she's probably not supposed to have a favorite but she ABSOLUTELY does and it is tina. this is almost canon imo she clearly spends the most time with tina (and of course she's the one who made gayle an auntie!!!!!) i don't think gene or louise are jealous tbh bcuz the benefits of being gayle's favorite included being sent all her old dirty bras and helping her bring her cats to the vet in one single cat carrier

there was a brief time when louise was like five or six where she absolutely HATED teddy bcuz he was coming into the restaurant regularly and she convinced herself that he was trying to steal linda away from bob and become their new stepfather (and from what she had seen in media she assumed if she had a stepfather she wouldn't get to see bob anymore which was upsetting) so she started acting out and doing things like squirting him w/ ketchup or pouring water on him so that teddy would stop coming into the restaurant, eventually linda had a talk with her abt her behavior and reassured her that teddy is just a friend and nobody is going to steal bob away from her!!!! after that louise warmed up to teddy lol

[erinmar13]

I just recently reread your Oliviza werewolf AU and all I have to say is…you know after it’s all said and done (don’t wanna spoil the ending for anyone here) the two of them are having insane bed-breaking sex and it’s being made the entirety of Fort Briggs’ problem

Bless you.

And yes, they absolutely are. I have considered this exact scenario btw. Like, to the point of wondering how olivier would reinforce the bed, the counters, the tables, her desk, the walls....because they would break everything.

And poor miles and buccaneer can hear so much.

I considered writing an epilogue (akin to the one in my harley/ivy fic) where miles requests demands to move his quarters as far away as possible because he can't get any sleep.

So yes, anon, i have very much thought about this thing.

[nexuswaves]

Waazzuuuup Harley!

I wanted to stop by on this fine day and spread some cool positivity to ya'. I've never witnessed Baldur's Gate, I have not been blessed yet - except for one thing - you! I followed you on Dean but let's be honest here your writing absolutely slaps, so I moved on over with you and I find myself reading your threads just to get a cool little dose of things that I have no idea of. Your writing is so good that I want to get the game. I want to get that PS5 and have a fantastic time.

You're just so good at making individual voices come through. Regardless of where you are or who you're writing, I'm just happy to see ya on my dash. Keep being cool - I'm a subscriber to the content, no matter the muse.

Oh hello pookie.

Yes I hate myself for that.

Ahem.

Anyway, you are an absolute delight and I’m glad you are enjoying my content no matter which blog I’m on.

Rest assured darlin’ Dean is not done for, I just refuse to be on him without doing him justice. Little fun fact, I’ve been rping him for over 6+ years! He’s the longest running muse I’ve had.

Now, as for the PS5, same. But I play bg3 on Xbox, I believe you can also play it on PC. So there is plenty of consoles to indulge in your daily Astarion needs. 🫢

Unless you prefer me as your darling vampire~.

Okay enough flirtin’ need to hone my dumbassry.

I adore you, thank you so much for these kind words, when Dean is up and running let’s interact immediately okay? ❤️

[theconstantsidekick]

BABES

I’ve been rereading everything in the staticverse bc it’s honestly become like such a great source of comfort for me and ily so much for it.

but as i was rereading i was struck by just HOW MUCH i love it. so i compiled a little list for you 💗

1. you have put absolutely insane amounts of detail into this and i appreciate it so fucking much you have no idea. there is layers upon layers upon layers of lore and plot connections and just UGH.

2. static. that’s it. end of story. just static.

2.2 okay so i know that you have your concerns about creating a reader that might be interpreted as “too similar” to the author but fuck that it’s bullshit. this is your work this is your creation you get to do whatever the fuck you want with it.

2.3 also static is such a badass and it’s honestly so refreshing to see a x reader fanfic where she isn’t a total mary sue or just the human embodiment of a slice of white bread. static is NOT BLAND she is NOT BORING. she has her faults she has her flaws and it makes her so much more relatable as a character. it’s so much easier to like step into the readers shoes when they’re a fully fleshed out character as opposed to a blank slate to project yourself onto. the way that you write static and her interactions with everyone around her is honestly on a whole other level and i like cant describe it it’s just so ajsjfosnsnajakakadjd

3. adding onto my like static and her interactions thing, dude. the way you portray her relationships with each different character so differently and yet so HER is insane. it shows how phenomenally multifaceted she is and i just genuinely love it

4. whenever the story is being “narrated” by a different character, your writing changes tone so well without losing its quality. there’s a stark (haha get it) difference between the way tony narrates as opposed to say steve or harley or even static herself and that’s something that i love with my entire fucking heart. you’re able to so seamlessly blend these characters together to create a beautiful tapestry of a world within the MCU and have i mentioned that i love it?

5. the EFFORT you put into this is unparalleled. like genuinely you could wake up tomorrow and say “im done writing this forever” and delete all of your work and i would still be happy that i got to be a small part of it. everything about the way that you world built and character developed and connected events is just SO GOOD LIKE????

6. this is embarrassing lowkey but static has like become my personality now? if im in a situation where im nervous or intimidated i just think about the avengers ft static when she goes to recruit Steve and he says something along the lines of “people didn’t hold themselves like that unless they were truly very sure of themselves” (i BUTCHERED that ik and im so sorry about it but i hope you know what point im referencing) and it like HELPS A LOT!!!

7. i originally read this bc im a slut for bucky barnes but i adore the way that it’s expanded to become more of just a series about static herself. you’ve developed such an interesting and exciting character that just like reading about what she ate for breakfast would make my month. and i will shamelessly admit that when she said “steve wasn’t the love of her life, bucky isn’t the love of her life, morgan is the love of her life” (again butchering the quote i am so disappointed in myself) i teared up. bc like while i am simply a hole made special for james barnes it was just so nice to see that this was a (cliché alert) strong, independent, female character who’s life didn’t revolve around a love interest. and no one looks for that in x reader fanfiction but it’s such a blessing that you were able to make it and i was able to find it.

8. this series and these fics are literally like free therapy and i love you more than static loves morgan, harley, and peter

sorry for the essay but i need you to know that i love you so so so so much.

im right behind you babe ❤️❤️❤️

when I tell you, I sobbed on a random tuesday morning after reading this....

I had been feeling really fucking shitty and then I woke up, i read this, first thing in the morning and honestly? Depression? Cured. Skin? Cleared. Laundry? Folded.

This was so personal to me. I just.. I cannot express how much this means to me, no matter how hard I try. It moves me so much that you noticed all the little information I had scattered throughout the story thinking like, 'oh this will be a fun callback when i read it later' only to find out you were following along!!!! This is literally the best feeling ever.

Whenever I'm having a shit day, questioning my 'talents' at work (because my job is in a similar zone) I come back to read this and I'm like yeah, well. @third-broparcelicito loved my shit so I cannot be that bad lmao.

Anyway, all this is to say, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading whatever content I put out and investing your time, energy and love into it so deeply. I swear people like you are the only reason I keep coming back to the series and updating it randomly. You keep me going despite my overly busy schedule. Thank you so so much.

I'm right behind you. I've got your back.

[wowifinallymadeanaccount]

Don't mind me just in the middle of my Abner Krill aka Polka Dot Man brain rot where I need to collect every little thing about him like a gremlin and imagine myself in every scenario and appreciate all these beautiful gifs of his character and his incredible actor WE'RE FINE HERE FOLKS I JUST DISCOVERED THE GIFS TAB AND I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH EVERY GIF AND WOULD LIKE THEM ALL ON MY BLOG

TO ALL OF THE CREATORS OF YOUR GIFS AND FOR TAKING THE TIME TO CREATE THEM ALL SO BEAUTIFULLY - BLESS YOU ALL

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE AND APPRECIATE THEM ALL

I won't lie to you when I say I absolutely cream myself when Harley and Abner look at each other MY BISEXUALITY IS IN FULL FORCE BABY

(and there will be a few other gifs along the way I love okay okay my blog I can do whatever the fuck I want (respectfully) thank you very much-)

THE FACT HE IS SUCH A COMIC BOOK FAN AND HE IS SO CONNECTED TO THIS CHARACTER FOR PERSONAL REASONS WITHOUT GUNN EVEN KNOWING I'M BALLING MY EYES OUT IN THE CORNER OVER HERE-

She's so pretty and wholesome help please

10/10 lookout would absolutely trust him with my life

I'm so sorry quick brain sidetrack distraction this is so satisfying and for some reason came up in typing 'abner krill' and I would like to eat one right now

I would also like to eat up Abner but that's another story

ONLY TEN IMAGES ARE ALLOWED THE FUCK TUMBLR alright I'm sorry that was a bit aggressive of me you're great Tumblr I'm just in a place right now I'M MAKING MORE OF THESE

[saint-starflicker]

Combination of "My F/F ships are rare", "There are no tropes" (but there ARE tropes there just isn't some element or other that will get me to actually type out the damn thing) and "Another Reason".

The Moth Diaries was one fandom that personally would have had a lot of potential to me to get generally interested in the what-if's and why's of the relationship dynamics—but, the fandom isn't really avid and prolific enough that I could get swept up. The objective potential is in a lot of works that I just didn't personally get invested that way (The Babysitter's Club, Mona Lisa Smile, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants) as well as works that really just give it to you it's Fem/Slash: Sarah Waters' Fingersmith/Affinity/Velvet, Gentleman Jack, Carol, Love Lies Bleeding, Steven Universe, the new Harley Quinn cartoon...

And other works I can name in which they're a significant or crucial subplot with a bustling fanbase (The Magnus Archives—although the one Gertrude/Agnes fic that got read aloud by the showrunners was not a ship that I conceived of before then, it's now my favorite because of personal issues with my personal history, and I won't add fuel to that spark though because that's enough amount and the perfect form of that content for me, I'm full up thank you carry on) or the identity is prominent and yet complicated enough that the sapphic aspect becomes subsumed by the themes (The Watermelon Woman, The Color Purple, Fledgling, Saving Face, So Close, Dalisay).

Bless the Galinda/Elphaba revival of 2024, but that was just never my brain rot. I understand the appeal and I was on the side of the fanworks even 20 years ago—but it just didn't strike me.

I like the idea of, like...Carmilla Karstein having a thing with Catherine Morland. There is a trope for that, the pink-and-goth girlfriends, but a trope isn't a plot, which is why I vaguely say a thing because I don't know what exactly happens there. I only like the concept.

I like the idea of Mary Ann Wilson thinking she's Helen Burns's bestie but it's Jane who turned out to be the main character who gets to be there when Helen dies, so almost a decade later Mary Ann gets invited to Jane's second attempted hetero-wedding and then gets stupidly sapphic around Rosamond Oliver.

I like the idea of Ginny Danburry getting constantly dismissed as some dropout's kid sister when she's the drama-club queen of Henly Hall, damn it, and probably explores midcentury Americana counterculture markers that she never actually gets to safely wear outside her room because she's supposed to be a prepster, and on top of all that stress of being a teenaged girl in the 1950's she's also crushing on her older brother's girlfriend. In my story she's not going to get her older brother's girlfriend to be her girlfriend. That can be a sapphic experience too. It's not all wish-fulfillment and aesthetics. Sometimes it's realistic life and history.

Somehow the only one that actually got written was a character study vignette of a character played by Catherine McCormack who wanders around bereaved and alone—just because Catherine McCormack looks exactly like my 10th grade bio teacher who I had a crush on and then didn't know what to do with that but put my own vague angst and ennui into that character. So that doesn't count as F/F because that's not tropey or plotty enough, but that's the most sapphic thing I ever actually put out there in writing. It just doesn't count as sapphic because it's not F/F, but it was absolutely a work that sopped up my sapphic life experience.

But anyway if anybody wants to mail me a physical copy of French Civilization in the Nineteenth Century by Albert Léon Guérard plus 12 months of rent and grocery money then I might actually get to finish writing that lesbian Beauty and the Beast origfic retelling. By "might get to finish" I mean definitely start.

This question is aimed at investigating why there are generally so many more F/M and M/M works compared to F/F– this is why "I write genfic" and "I don't write fanfic" are grouped together, since both of those groups aren't really involved in this particular imbalance.

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