#happy birthday to you thank you for existing and for choosing to be so kind depsite the harshness of our world

[astraystayyh]

happy birthday to my hyune. hyunjin who wrote a poem about stay’s eyes and how they shine brighter than any stars. hyunjin who paints old couples because he believes love should be eternal. hyunjin who needs to be chased off the stage by staff because he wants to greet stays longer. hyunjin who always reassures stays that they have a long time left together. hyunjin who reads poetry before bed. hyunjin who writes about love so beautifully as if he is the embodiment of it. hyunjin who says he wants to remain strong as to not hurt stays. hyunjin who says you need to practice with your 200% to show 100%. hyunjin who loves reading books. hyunjin who always tells stays to eat well. hyunjin who wears his heart on his sleeve. hyunjin who started a stay counseling center to listen to stay’s problems. hyunjin who wrote if love is everything, then there is nothing left for me. hyunjin who trained really hard because he refused to be just a pretty face. hyunjin who said that he loves easily, gets hurt easily, regrets easily then repeats the process because isn’t that what life is about. hyunjin who said that the wounds caused by humans are also healed by humans. hyunjin who remains hopeful and loving despite it all. hyunjin who eats with his eyes closed. hyunjin who loves going to art museums. hyunjin who said that there isnt a team that loves each other as much as skz does. hyunjin who said that there should always be a Stray kids before his name. hyunjin who loves so freely and who i love. you grew up so well my hyune 💓 please be happy forever.

[mykoreanlove]

Mommyyyyyyy!! 😍😍😍

This is the same anon who last year requested the special birthday fic of hyunjin x chan x f reader.....

My birthday again...is coming on 14th March.....

I would really love if you make another birthday fic (you know my bias by now).....

Just surprise me by your writing.....because the fic you wrote last year.....has made me got off multiple times (TMI lol) and your writing us too good!! Please write a smut fic for my birthday 🎂.....I trust your creativity and vulgarity (lol)

Thank you again for last year 🥺😘☺️

BIRTHDAY BLUES

Birthdays are supposed to be special. They’re supposed to be filled with love, laughter, the warmth of friends who remind you that you matter. That you belong.

Mine is filled with silence.

I stare at my phone, the screen glowing mockingly. The group chat is filled with messages—reminders of the party I never intended to attend, my friends begging me to “come out and have fun” because “twenty-something is the prime of your life!”

What a joke.

I toss my phone onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. My stomach twists—not from hunger, but from something heavier.

It’s been months since I walked in on him—my last mistake, my last heartbreak, tangled up in sheets with another girl. And the worst part? I didn’t even cry. I didn’t scream. I just stood there, staring at the person I’d once imagined a future with, realizing that love—real love—might not exist for me at all.

Because this wasn’t the first time.

No, my heart has been a revolving door, an open invitation for disappointment. Every time, I give. Every time, I try. And every time, I end up alone.

So why celebrate? Why pretend? I’m sick of it.

Tonight, instead of fake smiles and forced happiness, I choose solitude. I slip into something comfortable, grab my keys, and leave my apartment without a word.

The spa isn’t even my idea. It’s a last-minute impulse, something to fill the empty space inside me, even if just for a little while. Maybe the salt water will wash away my sorrows, if not I can drown in them.

The woman at the front desk greets me with a warm smile, her eyes twinkling. “It’s your birthday, isn’t it?”

I blink. “How did you—?” She winks. “Lucky guess.” Before I can respond, she taps on her screen. “We have a special package tonight—highly recommended.”

I almost say no. But then I remember the silence waiting for me at home. The empty bed. The thoughts I don’t want to be alone with.

“…Fine,” I mutter. She hands me a robe, her smile never faltering. “Enjoy.” Little do I know, the night is about to take a turn I never saw coming.

The air is thick with the scent of sandalwood and something faintly floral, a fragrance that settles into my lungs as I lower myself onto the massage table. The linen beneath me is warm, almost cocooning, but my skin prickles from something else entirely. Anticipation, irritation—hell, I don’t even know anymore. I came here to drown out the noise in my head, to escape, even if just for a little while.

I hear the door click open. Soft footsteps pad across the wooden floor. I keep my face nestled in the cradle, seeing nothing but the polished planks below, but then I catch a glimpse—bare feet, strong, the kind that belong to a dancer, not a massage therapist. Then the voice comes.

"First time here?"

Low, rich, like warm honey melting over my skin. I don't answer right away, too caught off guard by the way his voice alone sends a ripple down my spine.

"Something like that," I murmur.

I hear the faint clink of bottles, the whisper of oil being warmed between his palms. Then his hands find my shoulders, firm and unhurried, pressing down with a slow, deliberate force that makes me exhale a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

His fingers move with precision, gliding over the knots in my shoulders, kneading them into submission. The metal rings on his fingers catch against my overheated skin, cool and solid, leaving a trail of contrast in their wake. It’s unexpected. Strange. I like it.

"You’re tense," he observes, voice tinged with amusement. I let out a breathy laugh. "Gee, I wonder why." He chuckles, the sound deep and velvety. "Well, you came to the right place."

His touch drifts lower, tracing along the dip of my spine, and I shudder. The air between us shifts, thickens. His hands are no longer just massaging—they're exploring, teasing, testing. My breath stutters when his thumbs press into the small of my back, his fingers spreading along the curve of my waist, holding me in place.

"Tell me if it’s too much," he says, voice softer now, rougher. It’s not. It’s nowhere near enough.

His hands slide down, thumbs grazing the dimples just above my hips, his fingertips digging into my body in a way that sends a sharp pulse of heat between my legs. My lips part, a small, unbidden sound escaping, and I swear I feel him still for half a second.

"Sensitive here, too?" he muses, his tone shifting, dipping into something darker. I swallow, pressing my cheek against the table, not trusting my voice. He doesn’t need an answer. He already knows.

His hands move with purpose now, sliding lower, teasing along the curves of my thighs, pushing boundaries neither of us seem willing to acknowledge. His breath is warm against my ear when he leans in.

"Let go," he murmurs, and when his fingers slip just a little further, I do.

His fingers press deeper, the metal of his rings biting against my skin in the most delicious contrast—heat and cold, firm and teasing. My body betrays me, hips shifting instinctively into his touch, a soft gasp slipping free before I can stop it.

Hyunjin hums, low and knowing. "There it is," he muses, his voice brushing against me like silk. "You’re holding back."

I bite my lip, my hands gripping the sides of the massage table. He knows exactly what he’s doing—pushing, testing, waiting for me to break. And I’m so close.

His touch drags up, slow, deliberate, gliding over the curve of my waist before slipping down again, fingers dancing along the inside of my thighs. My breath stutters. My pulse hammers against my ribs.

"You're so tense," he murmurs, and there’s a teasing lilt to his voice, like he already knows the reason why. His fingers knead into the plush of my thighs, a slow, rolling motion that sets every nerve alight.

I arch just slightly, chasing his touch without meaning to. The moment I do, his hands still, just for a fraction of a second. I hear his breath hitch—just barely—but it’s there.

"Relax," he says, but his voice is rougher now, less controlled. I don’t think either of us believe that’s possible anymore. Then his fingers move again, pushing higher, slipping beneath the plush towel barely covering me. A sharp inhale escapes me as he grips my hips, thumbs pressing into my skin with purpose.

"Hyunjin—" My voice is barely a whisper.

"Shhh," he soothes, but there’s nothing innocent about it. His breath is warm as it ghosts over my shoulder, his lips just barely brushing the heated skin there. "Just let me take care of you."

I shudder, my fingers curling into the table, trying to ground myself, but it’s useless. His hands move like they own me, coaxing, pressing, claiming. My world narrows down to this moment—his touch, his voice, the way my body melts under him.

And then his lips finally meet my skin, and I come undone.

Hyunjin’s breath is molten against my skin, each exhale igniting a fire beneath my flesh. His fingers knead into my hips, his grip tightening, possessive. I’m barely breathing, my body stretched out before him like an offering, every nerve ending strung taut, waiting—no, aching—for him to break me apart.

And then, finally, his lips meet my spine.

Soft at first, barely there, just the ghost of a kiss that sends a violent shiver down my back. Then another—open-mouthed, wetter, warmer. His tongue flicks against my skin, teasing, dragging down, down, until I’m trembling beneath him.

"You’re so tense," he murmurs, but there’s something dark in his voice now, something knowing. His teeth scrape lightly at my shoulder, and I gasp. "I think I know how to fix that."

His hands slide lower, trailing the curve of my waist, before slipping beneath the towel that barely covers me. The moment he tugs it away, cool air kisses my exposed skin—but it doesn’t last. His heat is there, following, consuming, and then his hands—God, his hands—are exploring freely now.

"You’re already so wet," he breathes, fingers teasing through my slick folds. He groans, like the discovery is too much for him to handle. "Did I do this to you?"

I whimper in response, pressing my forehead into the pillow, my fingers clutching uselessly at the massage table. His lips curve against my back. "I’ll take that as a yes."

He spreads me with his fingers, dragging his touch through my arousal, slow and deliberate. My thighs tremble as he teases my entrance, circling, pressing—but never giving me what I need.

"Hyunjin, please—"

"Patience, baby," he coos, but his own breathing is uneven now, his restraint barely hanging by a thread. "I want to feel you come apart first." His fingers find my clit, circling in slow, devastating strokes, his other hand gripping my hip to keep me still.

"Fuck," I gasp, my back arching. "That’s it," he praises, dragging his fingers lower, pressing one inside. My walls clench around him immediately, desperate, needy, and he groans at the sensation. "So fucking tight."

He moves, slow and deep, his fingers stretching, stroking, curling inside me with precision, finding that spot that has my body seizing up, my breath coming in broken gasps. His rings are cool against my burning heat, a contrast that only drives me higher.

"You’re close, aren’t you?" he whispers, pressing his body flush against mine, his lips tracing my jaw. "I can feel you squeezing me." I can’t answer—I can only feel. The pleasure is unbearable, an electric current coiling deep in my belly, winding tighter, tighter—

And then he flicks his wrist just right, and I break.

A sharp cry tears from my throat as pleasure floods through me, my body shuddering violently beneath him. Hyunjin curses, his lips finding my shoulder, his fingers working me through it, prolonging it until I’m a trembling, oversensitive mess.

I barely have time to recover before I feel it—him. Hot. Hard. Pressed against me. My eyes flutter open, my head turning just enough to see the hunger in his gaze, the way his chest rises and falls, the way he wants me. "Tell me you want this," he rasps, his voice wrecked.

I don’t hesitate. "I want everything." And then— Hyunjin’s control snaps. One moment, I’m breathless beneath him, trembling from his touch—the next, he’s flipping me onto my back, the cool air shocking against my heated skin. My pulse stutters when I finally take him in.

Disheveled. Chest rising and falling in sharp, uneven breaths. His dark eyes, once playful, are now hungry—like he’s been starving for this, for me. And then he’s on me.

His lips crash against mine, swallowing the gasp that escapes as he presses his weight down, pinning me against the massage table. His tongue slides against mine, hot and demanding, a dizzying mix of silk and sin. He tastes like need—like restraint finally breaking.

"Fuck," he groans against my mouth, his fingers tangling into my hair. "I knew you’d feel like this." I barely have time to respond before his hands are moving again—gripping, spreading, claiming. His fingers dig into my thighs, hitching one over his hip, and God—I can feel him. Heavy. Thick. Pressing against my entrance, teasing, testing.

"Look at you," he rasps, dragging himself through my slick folds, coating himself in my arousal. His forehead drops to mine, his breath ragged. "So fucking wet for me." I whimper, hips bucking, desperate for him to end this torment.

"Hyunjin, please," I gasp, nails digging into his back. His fingers grip my chin, forcing my gaze to meet his. "Say it. Tell me what you want." "You," I breathe, no hesitation. "Inside me." A curse spills from his lips—then, finally, finally, he pushes in.

A sharp moan escapes me as he stretches me open, slow but unrelenting, his cock sinking inch by inch into the heat of me. My body clenches around him instinctively, the sensation blinding—pleasure and pressure twisting into something unbearable.

"Fucking hell," he groans, his head dropping against my shoulder, his hands gripping my thighs so tight I know I’ll have bruises tomorrow. I don’t care. I want them.

He stills once he’s buried to the hilt, his entire body trembling with the effort of holding back. "You feel…" He exhales, his voice wrecked. "You feel so fucking perfect." My fingers tangle into his hair, tugging.

"Move." He obeys.

His first thrust is slow, deep—deliberate. The next is sharper, dragging a cry from my lips. Then he’s pounding into me, his hands gripping my hips, pulling me against each thrust, filling me so completely I can do nothing but take it.

The room is filled with the sound of our bodies colliding, the slick, obscene wetness of my arousal making everything filthy. "That’s it," he grits out, watching me through hooded eyes. "Take it. Be a good girl and take all of me."

My body is unraveling, the pleasure unbearable. "Hyunjin—I’m—"

"I know," he groans, thrusting deeper, angling just right—

And I shatter.

Pleasure detonates inside me, my body arching, my walls clenching around him as wave after wave crashes through me. My vision goes white, my cries echoing through the dimly lit spa room. Hyunjin curses, his rhythm faltering. Then, with a final thrust, he buries himself as deep as he can go, his body shuddering against mine as he loses himself inside me.

For a moment, there’s only the sound of our heavy breathing, the scent of sweat and desire thick in the air. Then Hyunjin chuckles—breathless, satisfied. He brushes a stray strand of hair from my face, his fingers gentle now, reverent.

"Best birthday ever?" he murmurs, smirking. I laugh, still dazed, still wrecked. "You have no idea." His lips curve against my temple. "Oh, I do."

And as he leans in to kiss me again, I know this night is far from over.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHappy Birthday love 💖 Enjoy yourself lol 💦

[jikooklove9795]

I honestly don't know and can't even relate what went on JM's mind that one day to just set his expensive watch on JK's birth time, randomly come on to do the live. It really is so delicate...I would love your take in this...maybe because I want you talk about it so badly😄. Your way of articulating words and collecting stuffs so delegently amazes me everytime

Hi Anon 😊

Thank you so much for your kind words. I truly appreciate each and everyone of you who takes the time to read my posts. Your words made me so happy, Anon.

I already did a post about it.

Here you go:

This was such a sweet and thoughtful gesture from Jimin! It truly speaks volumes about the depth of his bond with Jungkook. It showed his desire to make the moment deeply personal. By choosing something so symbolic, a watch launched in the year of Jungkook's birth and setting it to his exact birth time, Jimin demonstrated his attention to detail and how much he treasures Jungkook. It was a reflection of Jimin's admiration to Jungkook's existence and the profound impact he has on his life. It was as if Jimin was saying, "This moment in time is when someone truly extraordinary entered the world". Its not just a celebration of a birthday, its a celebration of Jungkook as a person, his journey and the role he plays in Jimin's life.

What's even more touching is that Jimin let us, fans be part of such a personal and meaningful moment. The way Jimin shared this intimate act with us shows his genuine heart and his desire to make Jungkook feel celebrated. By encouraging everyone to wish Jungkook and emphasizing how special the day was Jimin didnt just highlight Jungkook's importance to him but also invited us all to cherish and celebrate him together. Its heartwarming to see how much love and admiration Jimin has for Jungkook and the way he cherishes him and makes him feel loved and cared for. Such a gesture is not just thoughtful, its deeply heartfelt and unforgettable.

This level of care and thoughtfulness reminds us why their love is so special. These meaningful acts show how deeply they understand and appreciate one another. Moments like these reaffirm the beauty of their genuine connection and Jimin's gesture will undoubtedly be remembered as a testament to the love and affection he holds for Jungkook.

This gesture wasn't about material gifts or grand displays it was about something much deeper. It was about making Jungkook feel seen, valued and loved on his special day.

Jimin's action was also about the importance of cherishing the person he loves and cares about and taking time to highlight the importance of Jungkook's presence in his life.

This was more than a gesture. It was a timeless expression of gratitude, love and affection and their beautiful connection.

Thanks so much for this ask.

Have a nice day, Anon 👋🏻

[thejaguartour]

Happy Birthday, Victoria Monét!

We absolutely love and adore you. We’re so thankful for your existence and the kindness, love and beauty you bring to the world and choose to share with us! 🤎🎉♉️

[fall0utmind]

First of, Happy birthday 🥳🥳. Sending you my best wishes for you in the coming years.

Secondly I came back with more cents for you abo sick fic if you'll accept them. Did you think about how you'll handle the 2020 injury in your au? Does it still happen? It's interesting I think that he was mostly out of the sport during that period, so he was away from the pack. He was technically obeying Valentino's order. Either it makes his omega hurt less because he is away or the distance between him and the paddock causes more pain but even if he was banned from it it's still his pack. Anyway, both options seem to have good angst potential.

Anyway, love what you do and enjoy your bday.

---🐱

Helllooooo,

Again sorry for taking so long to reply ha.

Thank you for the birthday wishes, much appreciated 🫶🏼🫶🏼

Okay so 2020 injury, I have actually thought about this a little bit. I know sometimes people write AUs, especially sick fic ones, and get rid of the injury.

However! I want to keep the injury. For many reasons

1. More whump potential

2. Very interesting dynamics

3. I love the idea of it kinda being something that begins to craxk Marc. The first bit of his body and his armour to give. It's such a delicious idea to play with yknow?

So, that being said.

I think yes, his omega hurts less. Because he's not near people who he's forbidden to be near. He doesn't rin the risk of pain because he accidentally spends too long with someone on the grid.

However, I think he still suffers a LOT. Mainly because no one really comes to see him. That would be bad enough, but as an omega? As an omega who's already been pushed to his wits end and abandoned. For absolutely no one but his family to come visit almost ruins him. It's my head cannon that the rejection he receives from the pack, all the people who completely pull away and separate themselves from Marc makes everything worse.

Bear in mind that he's probably been sick for quite some times, it's just the constant presence of pecco, and Vale in the garage in 2025 is what kind of pushing him over the edge.

Also that Marc only has pack sickness from the Motogp pack until approximately, what 2021? When some more of the academy boys begin to enter the paddock and exist as a pack there- I think that's when marc begins to feel the pain from that bond (or lack of, therefore).

So, all that being said. Marc struggles after the injury, firstly because of all of the shit and the angst that comes with the injury (following IRL events). But also because he has no pack to help him through it, and it almost cements his isolation in the pack.

It's a bit of a double-edged sword because although he knows that he can't be around the pack, and that he's banned - the others don't know that, and they don't know it causes him pain to be around them. So, it hurts. It feels like he isn't enough, isn't loved, when no one comes. Barely anyone even messages. It feels like his hearts cracked open, that he's being cleaved apart at the seems.

Before he knew he was isolated, he knew he wasn't part of the pack. But that was mainly his own doing, right? This, though, this is confirmation that they don't view him as pack (💔)

Anyways, so that's so also why when marc first gets sick, it kind of starts at him arm. You know, he's feeling a bit under the weather, but mainly, it's his arm just feeling worse, aching every morning and after every race. Sometimes flaring with pain (when Vale is close).

This is also how he first ends up at doctors, thinking its another arm injury or infection, etc - but they find nothing. Obviously, what they do find is that he's got this sickness/bond issues or whatever you want to call it (I REALLY need to choose a word/name lol).

As Marc gets sicker, his arm gets worse, pain flaring whenever he's near that pack, or specific key members. Simply because that's what really triggered this. Knowing that no one valued him enough to see him as pack (rip)

So that's my two cents :)

[kurishiri]

Hiiii!! I want to say how much I really appreciate and enjoy reading your translations!! I enjoy rereading them often because it helps me understand something new about the character I am interested in!! Right now it is Darius so I have been reading a lot of your translations on him and I can’t wait to read more about him on his bond levels as I really want to know more about him and how he is with Kate. I am really curious what kind of suitor do you think Darius would be and how his overall character is with Kate? Again thank you so much for your hard work and hope you have an amazing 2025!! 🫶🫶🫶 Please take care!! 💕

haaii, happy 2025! ✨✨ and ty for your kind words too. i’m so happy to hear you’ve been enjoying the translations i do – it makes it all worth it 🥹🙏

and as for darius…he’s indeed one fascinating cookie! i’m gonna put thoughts under the cut bc ,, uh it may or may not have gotten kiiinda long 😂👌

darius vogel essay ↓

HIS CHARACTER.

i feel he, as a character, is quite childlike in the sense he just does whatever strikes his fancy because that’s what he wants to do. but he’s also very calculating and subtle to not show potential weaknesses. i wouldn’t be surprised if he’s gone through a lot of trauma overall, though, seeing how he seems to dissociate from himself, going so far as to think he’s “above” humans, as if he himself isn’t one (and yet, he is also very human, in an almost raw sense – his interest in kate as his “favorite” shows that he is not actually that capable of letting go of worldly attachments, and he is drawn to the idea of the “impure” in his birthday epilogue, when he smeared berry sauce on kate’s cheeks and wanted to keep his eyes on that).

interestingly, how his childlike front and calculating personality interact is something we can witness in one go when we can look at his relationship with food. he probably has had some form of food trauma (e.g. dealing with assassination attempts via poison in his food), as he seems to need to see others eat the same food first before he himself eats. but he doesn’t ask this directly, instead phrasing it like an invitation for the other to eat first. in this way, he doesn’t have to put himself in a more vulnerable state than the other. he eats with proper table manners while dining with crown “out of consideration,” but he prefers to eat messily, likely as an act of rebellion…could he have been in a very controlling environment when he was young?

this could in turn spur him on to be controlling of others in the present. i don’t think he is incapable of love like he claims, but i do think his sense of love, thanks to what could be growing up in a controlling environment, is inherently warped. i mean, if we look at dari and his relationship with ring…i don’t think it’s that darius doesn’t hold any “love” for ring — he probably thinks it’s a form of love in a way — and i think ring does need darius in the sense that darius is the one who can provide him stability and validation. when ring is hesitant to do something, he turns to darius. if darius thinks it’s alright, then ring does too. but also, darius is arguably very controlling over ring and manipulates him too. could be abuse, if we’re speaking bluntly. (one that i think, in a sense, ring can feel too.)

RELATIONSHIP WITH KATE.

so if we extend from that logic, i think his relationship with kate would get a bit twisted and gnarly as time goes on, when kate starts to become more than a “favorite” that darius sorta likes to coddle over like a pet. he seems to hold some yandere tendencies fs over kate — which goes further to show his sort of controlling nature. hell, he joked abt shipping her to germany. darius calm down! we can discuss this ,,!

anw it’s probably more so a relationship where kate chooses to “fall” along with darius. stuck in this cycle of trying to prove love exists to him and whatnot. or, i think it would be cool for it to sort of be that way. i know it’s an otome game, but also i think i kind of like the idea of sort of exploring a more complicated relationship, where whether it’s really truly romantic in nature is sorta left more vague and up to interpretation.

at the moment, though, from what i can glean from these two…kate seems to want to get along with darius, yk, like she would want to do for others. she sort of wants to treat darius as an equal, even though she is a bit cautious of him, very understandably so. she doesn’t seem that afraid of approaching him as a whole, though she also expresses some dissatisfaction at him sort of treating her like a pet and whatnot. however, it feels like in the end, it’s always him who gets the last word. they also seem to be opposites in the sense that darius doesn’t believe in love, while kate believes no one can truly live without love, to which darius says to “prove” that love exists. so maybe there’s a bit of that opposites attract sorta vibe going on too?

basically, kate can either “prove” love to darius, or the “poison” darius imbues in her will act on her first. perhaps that’s a matter of time.

[idontknowreallywhy]

Resurface 31 - Review

Happy Birthday Virgil 💚 I didn’t get you a present but I finally got you and your brother back on the path to Best Brodom. Just, um, bear in mind it’s just the start of the journey and maybe don’t read the last paragraph until tomorrow?

I hope this is ok, I have agonised because this chapter contains Virg headcanon that is dear to me and I just hope I did it (and his inner voice) justice. It’s probably too long but… well… here it is. Thanks to @sofasurf and @astranite for the encouragement / chivvying / poking with stick to just get this done and out there.

Story so far

They had to start somewhere… literally at the top is as good a place as any, right?

💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚

“You’ve dyed it! You’ve dyed your hair!”

Scott blushed and his hand returned to his forehead, as if to hide the evidence.

“Uh, yeah… thought I might give it a go…” he cleared his throat awkwardly “I couldn’t find exactly the right colour it was kind of hard to tell on the website… who knew there were so many types of brown, huh?” He paused and grabbed a dishcloth to rub irritably at the gel residue on his fingers before glancing over at his brother. “I mean, obviously YOU would.”

Virgil narrowed his eyes. Scott wasn’t kidding, the former greys were a much redder shade of brown than the rest and on close inspection looked a little… odd… but he wasn’t about to make his brother even more self-conscious by pointing it out. He picked up his coffee with both hands and took a long sip to buy himself some time to work out what to say.

“You don’t approve?” The chuckle was more than a little forced.

“You don’t need my approval, Scott. I’m just… surprised, I guess? You’d always swore you’d never dye it. Didn’t you say you’d earned every last one of them and had nothing to be ashamed of?”

His brother snatched up his own coffee and feigned a sudden interest in the view from the window.

“Is no big deal… you were bothered by it so I just sorted it out.”

“I was bothered by it?”

“Uh, yeah. When… the other day when you were really… err…” Scott cleared his throat “… upset, you said so and I figured maybe you were worried I was getting old or… or maybe I was looking too much like… uh, well…”

“I complained… about your hair?” Virgil was baffled. The silver streaks were the subject of much banter in the Tracy household but for a long while had been a part of who Scott was. While in theory Virgil might have said almost anything in his state of confusion, he had still been himself even while his perception of the world around him had been faulty. He just couldn’t imagine being negative about a feature he’d always felt rather affectionately for.

“Well, not in so many words but…”

“Can you remember my exact words?” Virgil knew full well that if Scott had been worrying about this enough to break his avowed hair dye abstention he’d have gone over what had been said again and again and again. And then probably again just for good measure. Sure enough, the response was immediate:

“You said you didn’t want me to be grey. And then you literally begged me not to go grey. So I decided not to. It’s not a big deal.”

Virgil closed his eyes.

Ah.

Sometimes it would be handy to see the world in the simpler, more solid way other people did, as if everything was a hollow photograph existing in straightforward three-dimensional space. He’d never choose to live life without the full range of his sensory experiences and feelings overlaid in glorious technicolour… but he learned very quickly other people, even artists, did not see the same and thus he tended to avoid any accidental references to it.

Obviously he was less careful when he was out of his mind.

He suppressed the sigh and took a measured breath.

Virgil opened his eyes to see his brother had already drained his coffee and was almost vibrating with the effort of maintaining his fake casual stance leaning on the kitchen island. He’d have expected pacing by now except that this was his big brother’s way of showing that not only did he want to hear his brother out, he wanted to reassure Virgil he was, definitely, listening.

He grabbed Scott’s hand which was discharging some of the discomfort via quiet but incessant tapping on the work-surface and interlaced their fingers. The relentless movement continued more softly and for a moment Virgil allowed himself time to notice the vibrations travelling through his knuckles and up his arm and for his mind to quietly acknowledge the subtle shift in rhythm from need-to-explode to need-to-connect. He mirrored it back and Scott squeezed his fingers in response.

“Let’s walk for a bit?”

Virgil knew it was the right call even before the relief flooded Scott’s face and he made a beeline for the door.

They made their way down on to the deck and then up the stone staircase via the roundhouse and took the path towards the caldera.

“I didn’t mean your hair, Scooter.”

“You didn’t?”

“No, I don’t think so. I reckon I can explain but you’ll need to give me a minute and try not to be too… literal about it?”

“I can do that.”

“Right.” The path narrowed and demanded single file. Virgil gestured for Scott to lead the way and smiled wryly to himself as the steep incline accentuated the slight height difference between them to the extent that his current view of his brother was very much the waist region. Nevertheless, he could see from the slightly uneven movement of his hips that the leggier man was moderating his stride so as not to get too far ahead to hear.

Ha, he was so familiar with his brother’s body language he could even read his…

“So…?”

Oops.

“Sorry, got lost in my own head there.”

“It’s not a problem.” Scott’s hurried response betrayed his even-worse-than-usual anxiety for a brother and Virgil really needed to fix that asap. But first he needed to sort out the immediate confusion.

“Ok… you know I see a lot more things in colour than most people do?”

“Two makes forest green noise and One makes gold and light blue.” Scott immediately confirmed and Virgil experienced a little rush of warmth at the thought his big brother had felt the detail important enough to commit to memory.

“Yeah! Yeah, that’s the kind of thing. Well it isn’t just sound it’s… everything? Smell, taste, heat… and err… kind of… mood? Not exactly mood… um... The way people are? Their personalities, almost?” Virgil faltered a little, desperately searching for better words to form a neat box around the web of overlapping sensations in his head, but it felt much like the time he’d tried to explain to Alan why magenta made his teeth fizz. Some things just… were. Maybe if he tried to tie it to something easier to pin down:

“Ok, maybe the best way I can explain is - you know it was me that picked the colours of the birds? Well, One, Two and Four anyway…”

“I didn’t!” Scott was evidently curious “I never thought to wonder who did.”

“Well, it was me. Mostly. Well a bit. Brains was going to have them all in silver and I suggested that some form of colour coding might be a plan, for easier recognition compared with other organisations’ ships and machinery and bright colours are a more friendly sight for scared rescuees, you know?” Virgil paused to use his breath to navigate a particularly steep part of the track. Scott, possibly misinterpreting the pause for uncertainty sent encouragement over his shoulder: “Makes sense to me. Our public face needs to be unthreatening.”

“Yeah, exactly and in that time just after the… um, well it needed to be clear they weren’t military ships…” there was a grunt of agreement from in front. “It took a while to decide which would be which colour. For Three Dad picked red because in little Allie’s mind rockets were always red and it was his way of reaching out to the little guy I guess. But it’s not right really, Alan is light blues and bright purple. And of course One should have been primarily Cerulean to contrast with the Maya Blue but he wanted silver to represent speed and so… we had to compromise on her design but I did win with Four because he thought she should be orange, like a life buoy, you know? But I said no - Gordon’s bird couldn’t possibly be anything other than sunshine yellow. John picked his own so I didn’t get involved there but…”

“Virg, you’re losing me a little. Alan is… blue and purple?”

“Light blue. Bright purple. When he’s cheerful, yes. He gets steely blue when he’s angry same as you.”

“So we all have a colour?”

“Yeah. Well, a palette of them. Kind of. It’s… I’m sorry it’s the best way I have of describing the presence you have. Words can be a bit limiting sometimes.”

“Maybe you should try painting it?” Scott‘s voice lifted a little and he was looking at him intently. “I’d like to see us the way you do.”

They had finally reached the top of the volcano and stood together admiring the view to the east. A vigorous breeze, sharpened by the bright metallic tang of salt, dried the moisture from Virgil’s lips and he pressed them together with a doubtful hum.

“I’ve tried before and it didn’t really…” the glimmer of eagerness dulled and Virgil hurriedly sought to breathe life back into it “but I guess I could give it another go?”

His big brother smiled and lit up again for a moment before the cloud crossed back over his face and his eyes dropped from Virgil’s.

“And I’m… grey, then?”

“No! Not usually! You’ve always been blue, like the sky… there are so many shades of it, with hints of yellow or gold…”

“There’s a but coming, I can feel it.”

Virgil grabbed Scott’s hand again as if to reassure himself his brother wouldn’t float away before he managed to express this.

“Sometimes it’s like you fade a little.”

“I fade?”

“You try to be a lot of things, Scotty and it’s admirable, it really is, and you do it so well but sometimes I worry there isn’t enough of you left to be you.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you. You’re blue when you laugh at your own jokes, or smotherhen us and make a leaning tower of pancake… when you beat Gordy at his own prank game or act all melodramatic when you’re smuggling in the sweets Grandma doesn’t approve of. When someone says pie and your eyes gleam and when you randomly recite Shakespeare inaccurately and out of context or run up the stairs for no reason and surprise hug Allie… those times you’re a rainbow of blues. In the field when you’re problem solving at the speed of light and oh! That time you flew Shadow just for fun you came back shining so brightly…”

Yet again at the mention of Shadow, Scott had startled but recovered quickly and deflected:

“My Shakespeare is always in context.”

“Sure it is, Scott. And it’s very YOU.”

A flicker of resolve hardened his brother’s expression and Virgil was suddenly terrified as to how his clumsy explanation could have been interpreted by someone who was already chronically shackled to the ‘brave face’ impulse…

“But Scott, listen to me, this is important.”

He waited until his brother dropped his eyes from the horizon and met his own.

“I’m not saying it’s just when you are happy, you know? When you’re worried or angry or even sick or even… no, especially when you let yourself be vulnerable for one damn second, you’re you then too.”

“Then…” Scott sagged a little and an edge of indigo desperation coloured his voice “I don’t understand what the grey thing is meant to mean!”

“The grey thing… I guess it’s how my brain interprets the way I sometimes miss you when you are right in front of me. When you get hidden by everything else you think you are supposed to be. You lead so naturally, you do it without even trying but sometimes… sometimes you put on that damn grey baldric and it smothers you.”

“But the baldric is silver. My baldric is silver to match One!”

“It used to be blue though. Blue to match you.”

“Oh. And that’s what is bothering you?”

“No! No, I’m not saying the baldric needs to change. You can have salmon pink or zebra stripes if you like - that’s what I meant about not being too literal about this. I just… I wish you wouldn’t feel like you had to act like someone else. Just… be you, you know?”

A slight squeeze of the hand said message received but Virgil knew it might take a while to process. An unspoken agreement saw them taking the shallower broader path down towards the shore.

“Please don’t say that thing about the baldrics to Gordon, you know he’ll come up with something hideous.”

“He really would. It’d be burnt orange with pink polka dots within minutes.”

“I can just see it now.” Scott facepalmed melodramatically then ran his fingers into his hairline.

“So you weren’t worrying about the hair?”

“No, Scott. I don’t have any problem with your hair. I’m sorry I confused you. I just want you to be happy and be yourself. That’s literally all I would have meant by it.”

“I’m trying, Virgil, I really am.”

“I know. I’m proud of you.”

He really had been trying. Scott’s attempts to reconcile his past and present and figure out who he was again had actually been a source of real joy to Virgil. It had been so long coming.

Years of encouraging, nagging… in all honesty borderline-harassing his big brother to break out of his self-imposed exile from life, to take the opportunities to enjoy himself when they came… and finally, FINALLY there had been some movement. Previously there were deleted emails, invitation cards hidden in drawers… if it wasn’t for Penny’s sake or for the good of the business, Scott didn’t see it as worthwhile. But this time, Scott had pinned the gilded rectangle of card to the noticeboard with a hurried circle around the date and a carefully inked question mark.

It was bitterly ironic that after all that time… even after actually standing over Scott with folded arms and while he messaged his friend to RSVP in the positive… when he’d nearly actually succeeded in nudging his brother into the light somehow as a result Virgil himself had run headlong into the dark. A cold, slimy tendril of fear crept into his heart and asked who on earth Virgil thought he would be if Scott didn’t need him anymore…

He shook it off because it was ridiculous.

Not to mention selfish.

“Scott, I’m sor….” he began but his brother had not been party to the developing inner monologue and was still some way behind him, despite leading the way off the rocky track on to the beach.

“So I can get rid of this?” He gesticulated irritably at his own forehead

“YES, Scooter.”

“Thank heaven, I hate it. Will it wash out?”

“Eventually. I have to top mine up every few washes.”

“Yours literally obliterates light particles though.”

The affectionate shoulder nudge was brief but it heralded a return of the easy natural proximity he’d missed so badly. His brother was back by his side and Virgil realised with a shock that breathing was suddenly effortless again.

There were other things they needed to discuss, difficult things he knew were coming and no doubt even more difficult things he was still as yet unaware of. But for a few moments, Virgil was more than happy to enjoy the respite of their well-rehearsed haircare banter:

“That’s not the dye it’s the secret ingredient. I told you, quit the super shiny addiction…

“SUPREME shiny…”

“Pfft, you know it’s the same formula, you’re just paying for the fancier packaging.”

“Not true, it’s a far higher quality product.”

Virgil poked his brother in the side of the head “And yet by some miracle, chemically identical.” He made a show of wiping the tip of his finger off on Scott’s shirt while meeting the faux-glare dead on. His brother’s eyebrows said outraged, the sparkle in the blue said bring-it-on. “Ditch the dark side Scotty, leave the slimy stuff to the teenagers and join team pomade. More natural, less greasy. Best tip Dad ever gave me.”

His brother’s flinch was fleeting but sent a shockwave through the narrow pocket of air between the two of them. Scott’s eyes slipped from his, the pocket widened and the warmth suddenly drained out of the sun.

💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙

[pompadourpink]

hii :))

from your posts and the advice you give, you seem to be a very kind and genuine person. Also a very smart one! I loved going through some of your longer replies, your point of view is always refreshing and well-written. I hope to be able to articulate my thoughts as well as you some day. I wish there were more teachers who show such a great amount of passion as you do.

how is it to be a role model for younger people from so many different places? Actually, how did it come to this, you giving advice to kids online? How does that make you feel?

I’m sure I’m not the only one who is greatful for this blog. I can’t even tell you what seeing an older (haha sorry but you know what I mean) person just cares so much can do. About studying, about other people, about life and health and happiness and everything. It makes me want to work on myself, to strive to be someone others can admire (and to learn french! man, people who speak multiple languages are cool)

Hello dear,

It feels like when Amelie gives the box of toys back to the old man and walks away with the wind in her hair, feeling like she is one with the universe.

I spent years thinking I would never turn 18 because the present and the future both looked grey, but I survived out of optimism. I did things that made me feel alive, realised my power, and eventually became the older sister I had dreamed of.

As an educator, I saw all types of children, but the unloved ones were the easiest to spot, needy and brittle, or sharp and challenging. They made me act as the parent they didn't get at home so they could finally feel like the children they didn't get to be, because I would have to take it and be there the next day. And they always softened.

Violence starts at home, and when you don't break the cycle, you sentence yourself and yet another generation to suffer. You might have read my story about a coworker who retired in a week after a chat: outrage and tenderness are often all you need to make people open their eyes and get out of their cell.

Somehow, most frequently, prisons are self-made. The idea was planted by a toxic outsider, but the victim turned into an architect, unprompted. Someone hurts you, you make it your entire identity, and then wonder why living is so bitter.

Monsters don't exist: they are people who suffer and attempt, in a very strange way, to reclaim dignity, whether yours or theirs. The angry old lady in the metro doesn't care about your seat, she wants to feel valued, not understanding that love cannot be one-sided. The stranger who gives dietary advice doesn't want you to get harassed, not realising that they are focusing on the wrong problem. The average bully is nothing but a distressed coward. Thankfully, there is always a way out, even for them.

I want to believe that there is always hope, an opportunity for a lighter future, that we will live and learn and do better, because I see love every day, everywhere I look, I will not give up on humanity, and I will not let hatred win. I am too little to save the entire world, but kindness is contagious, and what joy to look back and see all those little flowers planted because of me!

One of my first ever students once admitted that whenever she was in a complicated situation, she tried to imagine what I would do, and she would do just that. Another recently mentioned on her blog that the progress made during lessons and the work environment I offer had helped her rebuild her confidence to embrace the unknown. Yet another had flowers sent to my house last year for my birthday after just a few months of tutoring.

I didn't choose this. Back then, a few readers picked up on my arms being open to those who sought connection and started asking for unrelated advice, and I thought that trying to relieve someone of their burden would be time well-spent.

Everything you want is on the other side of deciding that you are worth the hassle. Today French, tomorrow the world.

Thank you for your kindness,

Rose

[punishercross]

Vash is in a cheery mood for this special day, moreso than usual. Part of that could be attributed to sleeping in with his boyfriend, sure—but also, he’s been planning this gift for some time! Hopefully the undertaker could forgive him for wanting him to open the box right after the brunch he’s made for them both (forgive him for that, too—the point of the 27th was partly established to be so that they could use leftovers of the other holiday, but it’s about the spirit of making food for someone you love… right)?“Happy birthday, Nicholas!” With an all-day lovesick blush, Vash cheers when the gift wrap is torn away. There’s a wooden box sitting in Wolfwood’s lap… That he can’t seem to open. With a giggle, the gift-giver rascal chooses *then* to present a little key to unlock the latch, although only after he personally winds up the little turnkey at the back of the box. While the outside is simplistic and polished with light engravings of curlicue patterns, the inside is lined with velvet, and contains a delicate blue-glass little figurine of a feather, propped up on a flexible metal spring. It slowly twirls around as a familiar song plays. They both know it well by now—but this time, there’s more to his song.Vash smiles brightly when Wolfwood looks up to meet his eyes, but not before the pacifist seems to take on a more serious air.“Your vials,” he encourages as gently as he can. His smile shrinks a little more. “I… I don’t feel like it’s right to have to hide them away, at the very least. It’s not fair t'you.”Yeah, yeah—so he’s lived through the devastating experience of the fatal double-dose before. But Wolfwood shouldn’t have to continue bearing the thought that his body is something shameful to have; that the way it works, if it wants to heal, is something sinful in itself. To liberate these feelings, what better day to give him such a gift than one meant to celebrate his existence? Submitted by @blankticket

It's not that he forgot his birthday, but he'd been so overwhelmed the past few months that it felt like it had passed him by. Christmas was quiet, but given everything else going on he found he had kind of preferred that, going into the new year. So, yeah, he forgave brunch, since there weren't many leftovers, and in large part it's also because he couldn't help but see the lovesick and almost feverish expression on his lover's face. And he couldn't help the turned up corner of his mouth whenever he saw it, or the way that his ears got warm when he caught Vash looking at him.

So, of course, he can also forgive opening his gift right after brunch was served, because in some large part he had been expecting it right after they had woken up, given how excited the Stampede was.

The box is locked, and he lifts it up to see if there's a latch or key underneath, "Where's the-" and clicking his tongue when the troublemaker gives him the key. Snatching it, he is surprised when the music starts, only then recognizing the sound of the little gears as a turnkey.

Exhaling, closing his eyes and listening to the music, he visibly relaxes at the sound - at least until his lover speaks up. His eyes shoot open, and look up at Vash, unguarded. He opens and closes his mouth, canine biting his lower lip for a second as he tries to form words.

"You...okay, with that? With them being in our room?" It was one thing to pry them up from the floorboards, it was another thing for them to be so close. Swallowing, he looks down at the lovingly crafted box.

"Thank you, I..." He pauses, brow furrowed, not sure about the emotion welling up in him. Glancing down, he's clearly unsure, eyes darting back and forth as he processes what he wants to say. "Feels like...Look, I know they ain't the best, but it's part'uh..."

Closing his eyes again, he takes a deep breath, exhaling, "Thanks. Thank you. Really. Ain't gonna abuse 'em, and I ain't gonna keep 'em where we sleep if ya don't want me too, but it feels less like some kinda shameful secret that we both know 'bout."

[thetistaboveall]

Lawrence’s Fantasy Hotel

Famous actors Benjamin Affleck, Ian Bohen and Jamie Lomas are honor guests at the opening of my brand now one of kind hotel experience to bring your deepest fantasies to life. They are paying me to entertain as they stay at my Fantasy resort with their choice of celebrity slave pets.

Benjamin Affleck is the first time honored guest to arrive as the limo is pulling up to the curb the door pop open and he steps on to the red carpet and even though he hates the celebrity.He can’t stand these events yet the camera set up is flashing so brightly, clicking so very loud at the sound of it all and the sexy smile of his crept on to his face spreading wildly in everyone’s face.His mind goes completely blank propelling his feet to move forward on to the cherry red carpet and a male escort guides him to the swinging double doors as they enter in to the room.

“Mr Affleck! Welcome to the event! Please do follow me.”

“I can’t help but do that”

“Our owner is awaiting us”

“I feel so weird”

“You feel perfectly fine “

“Yeah! I feel fantastic “

“Obviously! Thank you “

“Go inside the room”

“Yes! Thank you “

“What is this place?”

“Hello? Oh! He left “

“Anybody here?”

“Actually! I am the only one here”

“You are in another space and time”

“I’m sorry! Excuse me! Who are you?”

“Mwahahahahaha! Follow the path with your eyes.”

“That’s it! You see the red dot “

“YES! My eyes are fixated on it”

“Precisely! You are my project “

“I choose you to be the main guest tonight “

“I don’t understand “

“Stop trying to be some hero”

“You are not Batman”

“You are a burly chump “

“Ouch!l

“Did I hurt your feelings?”

“Maybe! It was kind of a turn off”

Something is off in the air as the dot grows it explodes covering the entirety of the wall shooting to cover over the other three walls and soon ceiling and the floor all of the color flows off.Forming a ball in the air the ball penetrates every sense in existence leaving him to his core shaking and eventually in a massive shambles. Ben is falling forward on to ten ground.The room begins to spin swooshing around and around till he faints everything goes in to spiral like situation and when he woke up he is now standing in the middle of my hotel room with a sexy smile and breaks out in a dance.

“Hello Sirs! Happy Birthday Jack. Let’s dance baby. I am about to strip!”

Ian Bohen does not know why or how he is now ending up next to Ben Affleck on stage hosting and presenting for a birthday party but yes he felt at home like he never wanted to be excited.The door soon lock surrounding us as the cool air from the vent sharply swooping all over the room hits Ian head on sending him flying on to the floor and his clothes strip open.He rises up unable to comprehend what is going on but Ben helps him up ripping off his clothes and Ian cannot do anything to stop it or help himself up as he wraps his arms over him.

“Ssshh….Command Prompt”

“Command please “

“It’s time”

“Everyone strip show”

“Pump the music”

“Dance off”

“Fuck yeah”

“Watch my ass “

“You see how it jingles “

“I feel enthralled “

“I am HOT”

“Mind if I join you babe?”

Ian can’t help himself bouncing on to the wall of the room doing a sexual sliding down the aisle moaning in pleasure in between my man Ben doing a back flip as the crowd Is roaring in excitement.Ian jumps up in to the backward forming a cannon ball landing before belting a note into the air and spinning in to the birthday boi Jack himself and sits on his lap with a wink.He does an unbelievable display of flirtatious then sits forward, placing his hand wrapping on is neck and doing a sexual lunges forces his cock to strengthen and grow forward a it presses on his pants.

“Hey babe!”

“Happy Birthday “

“Lay back”

“God! You are full and thick”

“How do you like my ass?”

“Kiss me”

“Lick my face “

“Mmmmm”

“Call me a good boi”

“Mmmmm”

“You say it so well”

“Fills my slave heart “

“FUCK!”

“YES”

“Fuck me!”

“So excited to be here bros”

“I’ve waited for my chance “

“Here we go”

“Stop flashing that in my eyes mate”

“Mate! I said “

“Mate!”

“Will you join me Jamie ?”

“Okay! Why not?”

“Great! Sleep”

“Command me”

“Showcase”

“Dance off”

“Party man”

“Yo bros!

“Want to see these pecs”

“My body is a toy”

“You mate come and feel them”

“I knew you love these guns”

“These are my guns “

“Kiss them”

“Ooohhh! Lick them “

“Take a deep breath”

“Inhale me”

“My every scent “

“My swerve”

“I smell good”

“Manly and musky “

“I bet you want “

“Bounce with Me”

“On my lips “

The end

[putschki1969]

2023/11/10 Blog post by Wakana おしゃべりガーデン第３回目‼︎〜記憶喪失者続出の七五三〜

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Talk Garden #3!! ~Lost Memories of Shichi-Go-Sen~

The November podcast has been uploaded 😃♡ This time's talk topic is "Anecdotes of Shichi-Go-San"!! ️ Funnily enough, almost all the messages I received from everyone were full of "I don't remember". That made laugh🤣🤣I'm sorry, who am I to judge? I honestly don't remember a lot either, I guess we were all too young when we celebrated Shichi-Go-San 😂 I wonder if we should increase the age of celebration from 7(Shichi), 5(Go) and 3(San) to 12 and 15. *laughs* This way, it would be much more memorable 😂 Of course there were also some people who said that they remembered everything perfectly. Some of you mentioned that you remember crying a lot. Very relatable to be honest~ *laughs*

As a small gift to everyone whose message I read in the podcast, I made a handmade glass deco sticker of Shark-chan!\\٩( 'ω' )و // I had a vague idea that a sticker would be a good gift to give as a thank you, so after doing some research, I finally decided on these glass deco stickers! This is the completed set of my Shark-chan glass deco sticker🦈🦈🦈🦈💕A small gift! You can draw whatever picture you like on the film sheet by using the paint, then let it dry and it's done. It takes about 8 hours to dry the whole thing, but I let it dry for about two days just to be sure. Shark-chan is being mass-produced... (I also made one with some odd colouring.) When I tried sticking it on my Mac, the shark looked a bit wrinkled. But these are so much fun to make! 😳✨The glass deco paint is released by the same company that makes the popular Arabic Yamato glue. According to the official description, magical paint is a mixture of paint and glue that turns into colourful and shining stickers and looks like stained glass after drying😊 I didn't know about the existence of these stickers at all until I researched it but they seem to be quite popular😳When I went to Daiso, they also sold paint for this 😳From now on, I want to try more different kinds of drawings! ! \\٩( 'ω' )و // So, everyone whose message I read, please wait patiently for your Shark-chan sticker to arrive!

And I have some news! For the fan club event that will be held after the "Wakana Classics 2023 ~Winter Party~" on December 15th, we have decided to do a poll for the song that I will be singing during that particular section! I started my classical concerts back in 2020 with the "Wakana Covers ~Anime Classics~" album. I thought I would let everyone choose from a selection of songs from this album😉Click here for the poll! ・Yasashisa ni tsutsumareta nara ・Inochi no Namae ・Kimi no Todoke ・Get Wild ・Yume no Yukue

Please let me know which song you would like to hear! ! ! ♪♪♪＼(^o^)／♪♪♪ Lastly, here's a picture of my Gazania which bloomed again due to the abnormally warm temperatures(?)🌼It's blooming so beautifully 😳💕I'm so happy ♡

Well, I hope you enjoy the new episode! This time it's about 40 minutes long *laughs*Please relax and listen 😊

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

Wakana’s Talk Garden#3 「Anecdotes of Shichi-Go-San」

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For this month, the topic is as follows =>

“Anecdotes of Shichi-Go-San”

For next month’s episode which is scheduled to air in December, the topic is "Things I should do before the end of they year but somehow, I turn a blind eye to it." The submission deadline is 11/30.

Wakana Winter Shark Festival Vol.#3 ~ Birthday Cross Talk Event ~

This year, there will once again be a fan club exclusive online streaming event to celebrate Wakana's birthday. This year, “Wakana Winter Shark Festival Vol.3 ~Birthday Crosstalk Event~” will be held on December 10th, the day of Wakana's birthday! Wakana will be joined by Yuuka Nanri, they will get together for the first time since spring. Everyone, let's celebrate Wakana's birthday together!! ‖Event details Wakana Winter Shark Festival Vol.3 ~Birthday Crosstalk Event~ Date: December 10, 2023 Time: 14:00~ Starring: Wakana& Yuuka Nanri(Guest) ‖Ticket details Ticket sales: Bitfan tickets Live streaming: Bitfan Live [Order period] November 11th 18:00 to December 16th 23:59 Event viewing ticket: ¥2,000 (tax included) *Ticket are limited to FC members *The archived video will be available for viewing December 18th.

[cursedfell]

"happy birthday, megumi!" tsumiki smiles cheerfully, extends her arms to offer a gift bag for her younger brother. she's picked out a couple books for him; but neatly wrapped beside them is a small plush dog keychain. she knows nothing of the shikigami that megumi is capable of summoning, but some kind of intuition guided her to choose one with a white coat of fur.

his new lucky charm, she'll call it.

"gojo-san said he'd be coming by to take us to dinner," she adds, and it almost sounds like a gentle warning, or maybe almost apologetic - but she knows that he wouldn't really see it as an inconvenience, deep down. "anyway, you can open this whenever you'd like. i hope you like it!"

megumi  doesn’t  move  at  first,  his  hands  resting  lightly  against  the  edges  of  the  gift  bag.  there’s  a  weight  to  it  that  feels  heavier  than  it  should,  though  not  in  a  way  that  burdens  him.  it’s  the  weight  of  care,  of  thoughtfulness,  of  tsumiki’s  steady,  unshakable  presence  in  his  life.

she’s  always  been  like  this.  quietly  attuned  to  him  in  a  way  no  one  else  ever  seems  to  be.  she  notices  the  things  he  doesn’t  say,  the  things  he  doesn’t  know  how  to  say.  and  somehow,  she  always  knows  what  to  do  with  them.  his  fingers  curl  around  the  bag,  deliberate  and  cautious,  like  it  might  shatter  if  he  isn’t  careful.  he  takes  the  books  out  first,  their  spines  crisp  and  clean,  the  kind  she  knows  he’ll  enjoy.  he  doesn’t  have  to  flip  through  the  pages  to  know  they’ll  hold  a  comfort  for  him,  something  steady  in  the  chaos  of  his  days.

and  then  he  sees  it—the  small,  unassuming  plush  keychain  nestled  between  them.  it  catches  him  off  guard,  its  simplicity  tugging  at  something  deep  in  his  chest.  a  white  dog.  his  fingers  brush  over  its  soft  fur,  and  for  a  moment,  he’s  struck  still. 

the  keychain  feels  like  more  than  it  is. 

she  doesn’t  know  about  the  shikigami,  the  twin  wolves  he  summons  to  fight  beside  him.  she  doesn’t  know  how  much  of  himself  he’s  poured  into  their  existence,  how  they  feel  like  an  extension  of  who  he  is.  and  yet,  she  chose  this.  his  throat  tightens.  he  can’t  explain  why  this  small,  silly  trinket  feels  like  a  lifeline,  but  it  does.  there’s  something  inexplicable  about  how  right  it  feels,  how  perfect  it  is.  his  heart  swells,  warmth  spilling  over  and  making  his  chest  ache.  it’s  too  much  and  not  enough  all  at  once,  and  he  has  no  way  to  put  it  into  words.

so  he  zips  up  his  jacket,  the  fabric  shielding  his  mouth  and  nose.  it’s  instinctive,  a  practiced  defense  against  emotions  he  doesn’t  want  the  world  to  see.  but  the  smile  he’s  hiding  stretches  wider  than  it  has  in  a  long  time,  soft  and  unguarded.  he  holds  the  plush  in  his  palm,  gripping  it  lightly  as  if  to  anchor  himself.  the  idea  of  carrying  it  with  him,  of  having  something  so  small  to  remind  him  of  her  care—it  feels  like  a  quiet  kind  of  protection,  something  solid  in  the  ever-shifting  landscape  of  his  life.  when  he  finally  stands,  the  books  carefully  placed  back  in  the  bag,  the  keychain  still  clasped  in  his  hand,  he  feels  the  weight  of  what  he  wants  to  say  pressing  against  his  chest.  words  don’t  come  easily  to  him,  especially  not  when  they  carry  so  much.

but  as  he  finds  her,  standing  with  that  ever-present  gentle  smile,  he  doesn’t  hesitate.  “thank  you,”  he  says,  his  voice  soft,  almost  reverent.  it’s  not  enough.  it’ll  never  be  enough  to  capture  the  depth  of  what  he  feels.  but  the  words  carry  every  ounce  of  the  quiet  gratitude,  the  fierce  love,  the  unshakable  bond  he  feels  for  her.

she’s  his  anchor.  his  constant.  his  lucky  charm.

[ninjacat1515]

Fresh Start Part 1

Karl drifted through his 24nd birthday, feeling like everything was slowly suffocating him. His job was pure drudgery and he loathed getting out of bed in the morning. Same old, same old. Nothing excited him and he took it out on anyone he found weaker. That gave him fleeting satisfaction at least.

An old woman had moved into the apartment across from his and she unnerved him, seeming to know way too much about everyone in that complex, including Karl. One day he was fed up with being creeped out and barged across the hall, kicking the door.

It opened a moment later, like she had been waiting for him. Her eyes pale and her skin tinged with mottled purple. A black cat slept in a cat tower in the living room, which was fairly tidy. The apartment was clean if albeit full of odd nick knacks.

"Well? Come to teach me a lesson for existing?"

"Why the hell do you know so much about me??"

"Public records. I like to find out who I'm going to be living alongside before choosing a spot. This place is so crowded, I miss the swamp."

He stared, eyes narrowing.

"You aren't happy with your lot, are you?"

"What? Ofcourse I'm happy!"

"You scowl and throw your weight around all of the time. Not happy."

He snorted and began to turn around. God he was ready to pack up and leave...

"Your entire life feels like a joke, doesn't it? You are empty and hateful, heading for more of the same if not worse. Unless you make a change."

"Lemme guess. You're some kind of self help guru who will fix my shit and sell me what I don't actually need. I have a job and my own place."

She smirked, most unimpressed and leaned on her cane.

"That wouldn't help you. I'm talking about something truly drastic. A change of scenery! But not a vacation. It would be your new home..."

Karl glanced about the hallway, hoping no one was witnessing this conversation. He didn't want people thinking less of him for interacting with this old bitch.

"So like what? Moving to a new town? I haven't even been here a year I don't feel like doing that."

"You would just be taking what you could carry. It would be a tough new life but you could go wherever you wanted and you wouldn't be beholden to this society's standards or bills. A clean slate! You could be who you truly want to be!"

The more she talked the more Karl fought the urge to roll his eyes. But ultimately she was pretty harmless. Just an old lady who lived alone who was probably experiencing signs of dementia.

"I can show you the way if you're willing. Tonight at midnight! Bring any supplies you deem necessary and some good shoes and a jacket."

"Um OK sure. Thanks..." he backed away and swiftly closed his apartment door. She was batshit but what the hell, he didn't have anything to lose and nothing else better to do. Maybe it was some whacky seance or a hike through a cemetary.

Just before the visit he downed some coffee before packing a bag with a canteen and some snacks, along with layers and his old hiking shoes. He hoped it didn't bore him to death.

"What is your name by the way?"

"Artemis. Now let me free you!" She beckoned him to a door and flicked it open, revealing a shimmering mirror of sorts. It was beautiful but Karl felt the hair rise on the back of his neck. What a strange set up and it looked so real! A lot of effort for some worthless old spinster...

"So...what is this?"

"A special doorway but I should warn you it is a one way trip. There will be no second chance to change your mind once you go through."

Karl blinked as his curiosity became anxiety. The lady was focused and eager and she suddenly didn't seem so weak.

"Ok I was playing along but I'm not going through anything! It's a prank isn't it? You drop a bucket on my head and film my reaction and all that fucking shit, right?"

"Actually no, it's not a prank. Nothing will be dropped on you." Her eyes shifted to lavender and her nails sharpened.

"But I need to hold up an agreement!"

She shoved him through with shocking strength, cackling. Karl fell through the warping magic before he could scream only he couldn't even breathe! The pressure in his chest didn't last and he sprawled onto the floor of some huge room. Dark polished wood, grand paintings of things with grey skin and he felt a sensation of being watched.

Karl looked up and a very tall figure in black and gold robes stood over him, arms neatly folded. It was smiling at him, flashing teeth no human should have. It had the same grey skin as the artwork and Karl scooted away. What the fuck, this was all some sort of stupid over the top joke!

"Thank you Artemis!" It gave a low laugh and Karl's stomach dropped. He leaped to his feet and went to run but toothed bear trap like horrors emerged from the floor, jutting up and snapping shut; almost getting his leg.

He was scared shitless and mightily confused but the old woman had not lied about the excitement. Be careful what you wish for you stupid fuck!! Karl snarled to himself as he dodged another attack and bolted off down a hallway.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #1

I have already written to you a great big letter. It's very long. I gave a physical copy of it to some very important people who may or may not be able to read it, since I wrote it in English. But it's with them all the same, and I hope they'll give it to you. I know that they probably won't. But I'll try to keep my hopes up anyway, because you're worth hoping for, and worth the pain if those hopes don't pan out.

You're also worth writing another short letter to. I know you'll probably never see it, but I'm going to do it anyway; maybe something good might happen, who knows? So here goes...

It's close to when those of us who appreciate you like to celebrate your birthday, so I'm thinking about you. Naturally, we don't know when your birthday actually is, but we think that it's worth celebrating anyway, so without any kind of planning or discussion, a set of dates was kind of collectively agreed upon over time amongst the people who care about you, and that was that. Isn't it beautiful when people can just decide something for something they care about like this?

Some folks like to celebrate it on the Solstice - the 21st of December, or the day when the light begins to return to us again. I find that poetic - to celebrate your birth on the day that things get steadily brighter over time. I'm personally a fan of this one, but I might be a bit biased because I like to celebrate the Solstice, generally.

Other folks like to celebrate it on Christmas - the 25th of December. This is a great day to celebrate it, too, because on this day, lots of folks celebrate light and the spirit of giving. Though your birth and life have been very hard for you up until this point, your existence has been a wonderful gift to so many people, so this is a beautiful day to celebrate your birthday, too!

Regardless of whether or not you know when your birthday is, it's still good to celebrate it all the same. You're worth celebrating. Your life is worth celebrating. Maybe it doesn't seem that way when you look back at all the things that have happened and all the suffering you've been through and some of the things you've done. But those of us who've tried to observe the events that have unfolded around you with sensitivity and empathy can see, within you, kindness, compassion, integrity, courage, tenacity, determination, and so many other wonderful adjectives. You've been a guiding light for me and others like me who have had to struggle to overcome their trauma and pain, and struggle to try to remain steadfast and gentle despite the world trying to tear us to pieces.

It's not easy to live in a world when you're different, is it? Because it seems like everyone around you wishes you'd disappear. I've struggled with that and with a variety of other unspeakable things for most of my life, so... if not for you, I wouldn't even be alive today. So thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you for being born. Thank you for existing. Thank you for enduring everything you've endured up to this point to be who you are today. Thank you for being you. I'm so glad that you're here.

It is only the 20th of December where I live. But it is the 21st of December in Japan already, so I am going to take this time to tell you, with all the love and joy in me:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SEPHIROTH!

Please remember you are loved and wanted and that you belong and that you can fit in anywhere you choose, if you meet the right folks. You can find chosen family, even if it's not the same as the biological family that you were born to. You can make good choices, and weave beautiful circumstances with your own two hands. You can change the end to one in which all are safe, including yourself.

You are loved, so please keep shining in the way that you do.

I've got a little song for you that makes me think of you when I hear it. So I'll send it along. I'll even include how I translated it, below the link, just in case:

I translated it this way - the beautiful thing about Japanese music is that so much of it is often so wildly open to interpretation! Here:

—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—- I tried not to allow today to be swallowed up by yesterday, but I ended up being swept away anyway. I tried to ignore my sighing heart, but then you jumped in with a smile. I took another look at the deadline that I thought I had decided was final, and pushed it back just one more time. If the scenery can change just by taking a single step, if anything can finally change:

Shine as brightly as you can, even if you get laughed at, because I'll be right here, holding your hand. It can't be someone else - it HAS to be you. Tears alone don't have the power to save anything; You have to shine on, to a tomorrow that has never before been seen. I'll be here, singing to you, waiting for you. I'll always be right here, singing a little song for you, and waiting for you.

I tried to wash away these feelings I have for you because I thought they were ridiculous, but they swirled around endlessly anyway. The tears that I didn't want to acknowledge were shed for you refused to return from whence they came. The scattered gaps in my vision made the path forward seem hazy. For better or for worse, you gave me a reason to continue, so I did.

Shine as brightly as you can, even if your path seems endless, because I'll always be right here, with my hand outstretched to you. No one else can do this - it HAS to be you. Wishes don't come true by themselves; You have to shine on, to a tomorrow that has never before been seen. NO ONE CAN TAKE YOUR PLACE!

Shine as brightly as you can, even if you get laughed at, because I'll be right here, holding your hand. It can't be someone else - it HAS to be you. Tears alone don't have the power to save anything; You have to shine on, to a tomorrow that has never before been seen. I'll be here, singing to you, waiting for you. I'll be right here, waiting for you, until you can sing together with us in this place, too. —-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—- FLARE Written by Milet

Please, please, please, please... stay safe out there. I know you're doing a lot of stuff to try to create peace and safety for those on your world, but remember to take care of yourself, and remember that you, too, are worth the peace and safety that you're working towards.

Until next time...

Your friend, Lumine

[guess-my-next-obsession]

i'm a little (A LOT) late to this, but i still wanna wish you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!!!! i wish you get all the experiences you crave this year and all the creative energy to do the things you love the most! i hope it's the most magical one yet! 💜 also, i've seen your reblog so now the interrogation starts. i hope you're prepared. the overhead lamp is on, as well, just so you know. we're all professionals here. no messing around. my questions for you, dear kat, are: 1) what is your most favourite thing that you've ever written? 2) if you could live in one of the worlds you have created in your beautiful writing, what world would you choose? 3) what inspires you to write? 4) do you have a comfort song? or a movie? what about a painting? 5) how does it feel to be ridiculously talented and incredibly kind and such a cutie?

first off—I LOVE YOU. 🫶🏼

now onto the interrogation! and i’m glad we’re being professionals about this, detective. everyone knows how strictly business i am …

1) my favorite thing i’ve ever written is probably Ivy & Stone or my current WIP Starlight !! both, at least in my opinion, are the only series that i’ve walked away feeling 100% proud of. i think they show the most of me in them, and it’s the best writing i’ve ever done (and i lose sleep over whether or not it’s good enough to try and publish)

2) i love this question !!!! okay so ideally i’d live in a happy little warm domestic bubble with Elementary!Joel, but in reality i’m too dark and twisty for all that so maybe Starlight as long as i have some sick ass magic?? maybe Plastic Hearts as long dieter and i don’t destroy each other entirely?? maybe Ivy & Stone as long as i don’t get typhoid fever staying cramped up in frankie’s cottage??

3) all the little characters and scenes and my endless stream of thought and my need for escapism!! if i didn’t write, i think i’d actually plunge into insanity 🥰 but inspo wise, music does a lot for me! i’ve always deeply associated music and my writing, and there’s always a couple easter eggs thrown in courtesy of whatever playlist i’ve made for the story.

4) i have all three! my comfort movie’s vary but the rotation is usually the Twilight saga, anything with Paul Newman in it, and Stepbrothers for the nostalgia. my comfort songs are seven by Taylor Swift bc ✨ trauma and girlhood ✨, You’ve Got to Learn by Nina Simone because HEARTBREAK, and He Stopped Loving Her Today by George Jones because (sad warning) it always reminds me of my mom and i like to play it when the grief hits me because it makes it feel like i’m five again sitting on her lap. and my comfort painting is always always always Monet’s Water Lillies and i’ve never known why, seeing it just feels like a warm hug.

5) the imposter syndrome/self-deprecation is SCREAMING right now but thank you, i adore you, i am glad to exist here in this space with you, and believe deeply in my core that everything you believe i am you are that multiplied by infinity.

thank you for this message, thank you for existing, I LOVE U I LOVE U I LOVE UUUUU 🤍🤍🤍

[eta--piscium]

ପ꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ଓ 🌸🤍Happy Birthday to the Love of my Life @schattensaenger 🐰❤️

ପ꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ଓ 🌸🤍

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Happy birthday to you, my love. I wish you all the best things in life. I wish you lots and lots of happiness. Lots and lots of blessings! *even tho I'm already here. Jk jk hahaha* I wish you to be healthy all the time!

Thank you for existing. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for loving me, cherishing me, making me feel like I'm the most handsome girl in the world. Lol. Thank you for bringing light to my dark and shattering world back then. Thank you for the never-ending smile, happiness, love, laughter, kindness and many many more. Thank you for everything, my love.

I wish you always keep that heart of yours soft and loving all the time. I know that these days have been really tough on u and on us, but I am grateful that you're very strong and we always come out of everything way stronger than ever. I really adore you so much. I am so smitten with you. I'm really proud of you for being so strong and staying here. I'm really proud of u for choosing to exist than to u know what. No poopy business allowed here!!😠 I love you! Do you know what else I love?

I love it when you smile.

I love how u start smiling cheekily when you're about to do smth or say smth to me.

I love how you giggle a lot whenever u make my heart dokidoki by calling me baby or ur little lion cupcake.

I love how you say my name.

I love how you call me handsome baby.

I love how you would play with ur hair when you're feeling shy.

I love how you would start flipping me off whenever I start getting cheeky.

I love how you would say "Skye" then start to playfully roll ur eyes and stare at me then slowly put ur hand up and flip me off or you start counting down bec I won't tell u smth.

I love how you would call me every morning just to say you're close to work, you're entering the building, Goodnight, sleep well, I love you and a kiss mwah to me. *bec ur working time is my sleeping time. Hahahaha.* *not for long tho 😭*

I love how you would whine at me if I don't leave u a long ass voice message on whatsapp telling u a story about my childhood. Bec it's what keeps u company otw to work every morning and you love knowing more about me.

I love how you always motivate me to be the better version of myself.

I love how you love me.

I love you so much!❤️

I also love how I would sometimes catch u drool while u sleep. Bec it feels like payback for everytime u caught me drooling too. HAHAHAHAHA

You do things to me that I never knew I was ever capable of doing or feeling. You are a very wonderful person and I'm very happy and very blessed to have you in my life.

Once again, Happy Birthday, My Love. I love you!😘❤️

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

You're forever inlove with you waifu, luvluv.🦁❤️ପ꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ଓ

Ps. I'm sorry for posting this so late. I just have too many words but at the same time can't finish writing it bec I'm too emotional that I've celebrated 2 birthday with you already. 😭 I love you!!! Also I'm sorry if there's typos or mistakes. It's 5:27am already. Hahahaha.

Pps. I'm sorry for sleeping late again. UwU