#happiest moments

[mihran12]

One Moment in time

Each day I live I want to be A day to give The best of me I’m only one But not alone My finest day Is yet unknown I broke my heart Fought every gain To taste the sweet I face the pain I rise and fall Yet through it all This much remains I want one moment in time When I’m more than I thought I could be When all of my dreams are a heartbeat away And the answers are all up to me Give me one moment…

[xtrablak674]

Greatest Hits

[Originally posted on my blogspot 'Iconclastic Narcissism' on the 29th of December, 2007. Posted unedited, with a few comments for more context or clarity. I was much more explicit in my journaling, even knowing it was open to the public. I am not ashamed of this candidness, but have learned more discretion with age.]

I was watching the second to last episode of LOST where one of the major characters knew he was going to die and put together a greatest hits, simply a list of five greatest moments in his life. I was thinking myself of what would my list look like and I found and interesting trend amongst my own greatest moments. First none of the moments are alone moments but moments that have to do with someone else and are related to an event or holiday. I have made my list in no particular order:

•My first Christmas with Paul

•Valentine's day surprise with Steve

•My first art exhibition that Karl attended

•Losing my virginity with Daniel

•Spending the day my nephew MJ

•Finding my mother dead

X-Mas Tears

My first Christmas with Paul was one of our happiest moments he had got me my first membership to BAM that my friend Eric had promised to get for me and didn't. I was so overwhelmed by the simple thoughtfulness of the gift I burst into tears of happiness. It was a very nice moment. I can say with all honesty that Paul was my most favorite boyfriend.

[Also my longest relationship to date at four years, but the things I learned with Steve greatly influenced this affair.]

Heart-Day Hotness

We had only met each other a week prior on February 7th,  but in that time that magic and passion I seem to create with my men was created with Steve, and he designed one of the most romantic evenings I have ever had, which appropriately was on Valentine's Day. He bought me to his apartment shared with two other roommates who he had gotten rid of for the evening. I was blindfolded and walked through the front door, where he had me disrobe and gave me a beautiful candlelit bath, where if I remember correctly he bathed me, toweled me off then slipped me into a pair of burgundy silk boxers and a matching terry cloth robe. 

He then led me past his bedroom to the living room where he had moved out all the furniture and arranged a piece of fur chocolate covered strawberries and sparking cider (he remembered I didn't drink). He then lit a fire one of those Duraflame logs, he gave me a gorgeous fossil watch and I think a leather wallet, we made love in front of the flames and fell asleep by the fire in each others arms. Steve was my first boyfriend and really set the bar for how I treated my future boyfriends and where I got the habit of spoiling my men from. One of my shortest relationships only lasting 9.5 weeks but Steve definitely hit the greatest hits in my heart.

Artistic Cherry-Busting

My first art exhibition was a great moment because it was the time I realized that people actually like my photography and thought I was an artist, it was a defining moment for me because I had always struggled with being considered an "artist". This exhibition of 19 of my pieces seven of which sold along with numerous postcards of the work was a total success, that also corresponded with my third date with Karl who attended and got along wonderfully with my friends and got treated to a very Steve-esque romantic picnic dinner in Prospect Park with me later that evening as we watched Close Encounters of the Third Kind tying into my three theme of the date. Making the entire day a wonderful moment and a greatest hit.

Statutory Rape #NotReally

[BTW the age of consent in New York State is seventeen]

Even though I had been sucking dick since I was eight years old, I didn't lose my virginity (having a man penetrate me) until I was seventeen. The funny thing is that Daniel who was 28 at the time thought I was like 25 and was a little shocked by my revelation of my age after his deflowering me and the level of experience I showed with the event (I had practiced with candles and dildos). Having a man inside of me the first time was a very overwhelming moment and I remembered crying a little when I came, I was so emotionally overwhelmed with the experience of the fullness and the pulsing of Daniel's member inside of me. It was a moment of great intimacy and a little fear but great happiness.

[I wouldn't learn until I think '04 that the sexual relations I had as a tender-aged child were in fact sexual abuse. I only became aware of this when reading a book to understand a boyfriend's sexual abuse as a child. This revelation set an upheaval in my sexual activity leading to my over a decade celibacy, while I reset myself and moved away from the toxic behavior I had been practicing for years.]

Playing Uncle

I don't think I realize how much I enjoyed being a big brother and an "uncle" until I was denied the privilege. The last time I saw my nephew MJ was also one of my happiest moments. Meeting his mother, his little sister and spending the day at Bryant Park on the merry go round then off to Toys-R-Us for a ride on the Ferris Wheel and finally dinner at Olive Garden was a very happy day for me.

I had bought gifts for both of the kids and the mother. I was so saddened that when she moved she fell out of contact and I never saw MJ again, until years later. I have several nieces and nephews, and by default MJ became the favorite because I had spent the most time with him, most of them I haven't even met and am not sure if they even know I exist its sad, but I don't hold the  children at fault  but the parents and I will make  arrangements for all of my nieces and nephews in my estate planning.

[Now some of the children have children, and I don't think I have met any of their kids yet and there are like four of the kids I haven't met. Its the saddest part of being a part of a family that has lost the matriarch, there isn't anyone to encourage the family to stay together.]

She's Dead Jim!

Finding my mother dead on the couch I have to say is one of the most life defining moments for me. I know its maybe odd to have on a greatest moments list, but I would not be the person I am today with out my mother dying when she did. I wouldn't have the strength, independence, perseverance and common sense that developed in her absence.  I happily admit I was a momma's boy and my mother spoiled her boys (as I  spoil my men), I got away with murder  in my mother's house, and  could  nearly do no wrong, and the wrong I did do, I learned to charm myself out of any significant punishment. No single moment has effected me as much as her death even though it was more then two decades ago, its still one of the most significant moments in my life.

[As of this year its been exactly forty years since she's been dead. I have been alive way longer than I ever had parents.]

[Photos by Brown Estate]

[minzbins]

(981025) happy birthday lee know 🎂

cr. nn_sam02, nn_sam02

[suntails]

200 years

[jkvjimin]

PARK JIMIN + dominating the stage with his aura (cr. namuspromised, jung-koook) | [template]

happy birthday, annie! @kimtaegis 💜

[raplinenthusiasts]

I LIVE SO I LOVE

for @aprylynn 💙

© namuspromised, doolsetbangtan spotify template, animated lyrics template

[itz-pandora]

Thanks Anon, Shadamy is now something that happens in the misc AU, albeit brief.

[etrevil]

Gay clown man has just been reunited with long-distance boyfriend who was arrested for counts of attempted terrorism.

[chernabogs]

Malleus' immediate response to learning of Lilia giving a portion of his life for Malleus'—arguably one of the most sincere acts of love someone can do for another—being that of violence and a blind want to enforce into reality his own perception of what he believes Lilia's happiness to be is one of the most tragic things yet

[ethanhuntfemmefatale]

sometimes i think about an AA universe where Edgeworth didn't have to be shuffled off every 5 seconds so he could maintain credibility as a rival....where Phoenix didn't have to win every case...yes AA is a game yes i understand why it did that for the narrative. but when I look at those lonely scared 24 year olds from AA1 i can't help but think that their version of a happy ending would be to be able to get used to each other. to face each other over stupid cases and small things. Sometimes one winning, sometimes the other, until it hardly matters anymore, all that matters is finding the truth together. I want them to take each other for granted!!! i want them to look at the other across the courtroom and say "time to face this bitch for the hundredth time i guess!!" these poor bastards have never had anything approaching emotional stability before let them have each other damn it

[starry-skies-writes]

Do you guys think that when Leola first died, Aaravos filled at least a few books with his memories of her so that he wouldn’t forget her even if millennia passed

(He didn’t have to before of course, since they were supposed to have a whole life together)

(And now he can’t lose her in more ways than one)

[flymmsy]

Its mentioned in game that the Iron Throne is a research facility before a prison and I really like to imagine Gortash down there for days, giddy because horror!science, until Durge has to go down and drag him back top side.

[cherryys]

ever since 266, I saw many people say that because megumi doesn't want to be a jujutsu sorcerer, that means his conclusion doesn't have to have anything to do with using his technique or completing his domain and that him just getting saved is fine, and that is his purpose in the story, and I completely disagree.

Megumi has always treated his technique as a curse in his life, one he had never wanted and one that had always hindered him. he viewed it as a crutch, a weakness, something that controls him rather than him controlling it as its user. it had dictated his life ever since his birth and subsequently forcing him into the gruel jujutsu world, with his father selling and abandoning him, the expectations placed on him by Gojo to surpass him because of his technique, along with now, Sukuna stealing his body, his autonomy, his agency, and his ability to make a choice along with killing his sister and hurting his friends just because of his technique. Him learning that instead of fearing his technique and treating it as something he'll never control or grasp and that its power is way beyond him, he does have the strength and newfound mindset to control it, be its master and be able to completely understand and interpret his technique would be a great way to conclude his character arc and his rocky relationship with his technique.

him completing his domain doesn't have anything to do with jujutsu sorcery. his domain is a representation of his sense of self, his self-identity, his character, so to speak. it being incomplete from the start was to show you that megumi hadn't grasped his sense of self yet, hasn't found an identity unique to himself outside of wanting to save his sister (and later, yuuji) and his complete disregard for his life in general. his incomplete domain is basically showing you his incomplete character. I just can't really fathom the domain not being completed especially after him being at the climax of his character arc. it's more than just a jujutsu thing for megumi's character, it represents him.

also, megumi's purpose this entire arc to just be saved is hardly a good conclusion to his character. his entire life, he'd been stripped of his autonomy, the power to choose, the power to control his life. that was what reggie's curse was: let fate toy with you, become a clown, then die. his conclusion should be him breaking AWAY from that curse, to stop fate from toying with him, and instead of just laying down and letting life kick him over and over, he stands up and finally kicks back, fights against the circumstances, saves himself, instead of doing nothing and just letting others save him. what would be the point, then? he'd be reduced to a literal plot device, whose entire role in the story is to let his body be taken over by sukuna for his technique, and he doesn't even save himself, he just lets others do the work for him. that would be a horrible conclusion. it wouldn't make his dream of wanting a peaceful life earned for me, not because megumi HAS to be useful or has to prove himself to deserve a simple life, but because he hasn't really changed. he's the same as he was before, letting life toy with him over and over and reduced to just the damsel in distress who constantly needs others to do the work for him.

I want him to fight back. I want him to save himself. I want him to put in the work to change his fate.

[raplinenthusiasts]

#besties for @94erz 💜

© qdeoks , theultimatedodo

[sassyfever]

I couldn't sleep because I kept thinking about this scene; so I doodled this all night instead of sleeping

[mmikmmik]

When Mirabelle chews Siffrin out in Act 5, she actually does correctly touch on a huge issue in their relationship that's prominent from at least Act 3 and arguably present before the loops.

From the ISAT script project (emphasis mine):

Mirabelle: Is something wrong, Siffrin? Did something happen? Did you have a nightmare or something? Siffrin: No, of course not. Mirabelle: Then what happened, Siffrin! Because clearly something did happen!!! Otherwise, i-if nothing happened, I'll have to accept the fact that I was wrong about you!!! Siffrin: (Huh…?) Wrong about me…? Mirabelle: . . . Mirabelle: You always tease me, Siffrin. And it's fine. Everybody does. I guess I have the kind of personality where it's easy to want to tease me. But I know people don't mean it. It's how-- It's how some people make friends. And I thought it was the same for you. I thought, "It's okay, they don't mean it, it's how they are. They tease me, but they're never mean. And Siffrin never really hurts me." "Would never really hurt me." Mirabelle: . . . Mirabelle: But now you have, Siffrin! Thinking I should be alone… Telling me I should be alone… Who do you think you are, to say this to me? Acting like-- Like you know better than me!!! Always soooo mysterious, Siffrin, always talking as if you're better than me! As if you know me!!! But you don't, Siffrin!!! You're just as lost and useless as I am!!! So stop!!! Talking!!! As if you know me!!!!!!

I think it's easy to miss because so much of what Mirabelle says is off base. Because Siffrin insists "no, I really did just decide to suddenly undermine your self-confidence and trust in me out of nowhere for no reason, on the day before we're supposed to fight the King together", Mirabelle goes off that premise and rants that they must never have really cared about her or their mission. Obviously untrue. I think even Mirabelle's dialogue here is hinting that she knows on some level that this is one of her deep insecurities coming to the surface and it makes more sense if something did actually happen that Siffrin is refusing to explain.

But it is true that Siffrin acts superior sometimes. At the start of Act 3, Mirabelle sees him freaking out after his first meeting with Euphrasie and tries to comfort him. She sees through multiple attempts to laugh it off or deflect her (i.e., lie to her); she coaxes them to talk to her, she begs them to talk to her, and finally gently but seriously tells them that the group needs to trust each other and share their worries. And Siffrin's take-away from that last tactic is... "[I] know why she's asking [me] this. Poor Mirabelle can't just say it, so [I]'ll have to do it for her..." and asks Mirabelle what she needs help with, to Mirabelle's visible and uncharacteristic frustration. What condescension! Siffrin was being way nicer about it when he was in a better mental space, but he was basically doing the same thing Mirabelle correctly accuses him of doing in Act 5.

To be fair to Siffrin, they seem genuinely confused in Act 3 when Mira is trying to convince them to share with her, so I think it's more about them being repressed and inexperienced with friendship than an ego thing. But I do think ego is part of it, if only in an "I like myself better when I'm making Mirabelle happy" kind of way. Whatever's going on internally, the bottom line is that Siffrin is not treating Mirabelle respectfully as his adult peer and friend.

Of course Act 5 Mira doesn't remember that Act 3 conversation, so given how she described the behavior, I'm guessing Siffrin has done this sort of thing occasionally before the events of the game. And I think you can see some similar behavior in earlier acts. Siffrin worries a lot about saying things that might have upset or embarrassed Mirabelle, and a lot of their non-plot-related dialogue variations I can think of are trying to be more encouraging towards her. That's more of a grey area, though - I'm not sure I disagree with him doing stuff like faking enthusiasm for the sleepover idea or calling her plant cute. It's kind of a red flag in the context of everything else, but I can't really blame him for it. Even if these issues were fully present before the loops, I think Siffrin and Mirabelle could have worked past them without having to have a really awful fight like that, if Siffrin wasn't falling apart so badly. I really, really like their resolution to be "feelings buddies" as a conclusion to this character arc - yeah! opening up! mutual trust and reassurance! willingness to be vulnerable with each other! Good for them!