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husbandohunter · 3 years ago

Note

Dottore with short drabble “You only ever brought me pain and I’m sick of it.”

Something angsty pls? Thank you!

Tainted Glass [Dottore x Reader/Genshin Impact]

Synopsis: Can you escape the prison you made?

(A twisted Cinderella story. The girl was covered in cinders because she was fatally addicted to drowning in flames.)

Warnings: angst, emotional abuse, violence, death

(A/n): To be honest anon, I didn’t know what the word ‘drabble’ means until I googled it. I uh...hope you don’t mind the length :>

-----------------------

You fell back against the cold hard floor with your arms bent and head turned sideways. The stinging pain spreads across your cheek. It burns. But your mind was still trying to register what had just came into fruition.

Why?

The thought was so foreign somehow as if you could hardly believe he was doing this. But then the scene plays in your head again. You froze, your gaze enlarged and clueless while staring at the pale ground as it slowly begins to darken in the seeping movement of his menacing, haunting shadow.

"Insolent woman, you wretch!" He spat in a disgusted tone, "How dare you speak to me in such demanding manner? Have I already told you, only talk when you have something important to say?"

You didn't respond, rather you merely let the strands fall in front of your vision as you gingerly pressed your hand against the place where he hit you.

I…don't quite understand…

Dottore glowers down at your hunched form. He was never a man known for the virtue of patience. This man, the one who calls him your husband, you learned a long time ago to not meet his eyes as they would signal a hint of dominance amidst his authority, especially during moments like these. You came to feel his eyes instead, they were usually intense and full of wrath, sometimes crazed and curious while looking at his finest creations. He always loved experimenting in his labratory. After all, it was the only thing that could truly make the madman smile.

What is it that I'm missing? Where did I go wrong?

And you would do anything to obtain at least a fraction of the love he had left in his heart.

He marches onward with heavy footsteps, paying no mind to your well-being, "Tch get out of my sight. I don't have the time to entertain with anymore these theatrics."

At the sound of him leaving you darted your attention towards him, "Wait, come back. Come back, " you plea softly, "Hector…" But he ignores your call. The back of your fiance disappears behind the door and slams it with a resounding thud. He was gone. You couldn't save him.

"No," As a result, you burried your face into your palms and cried.

“I'm sorry.”

…

What is love?

Being raised in one of the most prestigious bloodlines of Fontaine, a life filled with riches since your parents were well known scholars throughout Teyvat, they provided you and your family with everything you needed. From exquisite dishes to priceless jewelry, yet even among those riches you never did find an answer to your question. They were tangibles and short-lasting, eventually leaving you with nothing until the glass of your heart was filled empty. They seemed to have cared more about their fortune along with the brightest child of their family line, your brother, a male heir, someone who fulfilled their expectations where you couldn't do so. And because he was able to give them what they wanted, he was loved.

I see, love is conditional.

Realizing that you possessed no talent to achieve what your brother had accomplished, you came to accept that you were undeserving of their love. Love was for the smart. Love was for the gifted. Love was for everything you are not. There was no place for your kind and thus you locked yourself up in your bedroom chambers along with your fragile heart where no one would try to find you, picking up the books upon the shelves and getting lost in their fantasies.

They told you many beautiful things about the world and many reasons why it was so tragic. Because they weren't real. The story begins with a princess who was a kind-hearted soul, deprived from the care of her evil stepmother and dreams of marrying a prince from a land far far away. They often end on a happily ever after with the princes finding her one true love. You've never seen anything like it. Where two people, despite the struggles they went through, loved each other unconditionally.

Unconditional love only exists in dreams.

Or so you thought to believe.

One day a man marched right at the doorsteps of your mansion. He was a student coming all the way from Sumeru Academia and had high hopes of building a business partnership with your father. The man was declined of course, you watched from the garden bushes as he was sent off back into his carriage. He stops abruptly and turns his head ajar to catch your figure, his inquisitive eyes were both striking and sharp. Like thorns of a rose that was ready to prick anyone who dares to come close. Even so, they made a very lasting impression.

Red eyes.

It was the first time that someone had looked your way.

Couple of months later, the government had arranged a grand ball where all nobles would gather and commit to building their social circle. Useless events. There was no reason for you to engage. While your parents were occupied with the latest gossips and your brother surrounded by fathers who were eager to marry their daughters to him, you snuck outside to the balcony and hid away from the crowd. Quiet at last. And as things should be. The moon was your only friend because she was just like you; half empty. Maybe that was why you still had a glimmer of hope for the other half to be filled.

Part white, you inquired, pristine and untainted. From far away it looked similar to snow.

"My, how pleasantly surprising."

While the other part was stained with black cinders.

You glanced over your shoulder to see a man leaning against the pillar. His mint coloured bangs were slicked back in a trendy fashion, complimenting the white suit he adorned himself with. The golden chains hanging around his ebony boots dangled and clanged with each step he took forward until the light finally reveals his face.

"You seem familiar," you say while squinting your eyes, "Are you the person my father rejected back in February?"

He quirks one brow and you were afraid if you had offended him. But before you could utter an apology, the man splits his lips into a toothy grin and bursts out into a maniac-like laughter. He was completely insane, you thought to yourself. Though he paid no mind to your discomfort and continued to dwell in his amusement, "Hahaha straightforward, I like it! So what if I am? Is it a requirement to be a noble for me to simply have a chat?"

"And if I may ask why?"

"Hmmm, why?" The man reaches for the balcony and presses his back there. He threw his head backward before drilling his ruby gaze into yours, "I too am not fond of annoying crowds. Those snobbish fools thinking they're above everyone else just because they have a couple of mora when that is all they are worth. It's almost too hilarious for my own good."

You could tell there was disdain in his tone. Mainly towards your father who were one of the many unkind nobles of Fontaine and was only liked because of his success. Gripping your hands upon the stone railings, you looked down at the distant trees below while the wind rustled them apart, "I can't deny that," you say dissapointedly, "It's common for nobles not to associate with lower classes as it could potentially ruin their image. Though I may not have been there but I'm sure you had much to offer in terms of your brilliance, erm, Mister…?"

"Hector," Hector placed a palm on his chest with a polite bow following suit, "Hector Dufour-Lapointé. It is a pleasure to make you an acquaintance Lady (Y/n)."

"You know my name?"

"How could I not?" Hector smirks lazily as he danced around you, "I saw you before hiding behind the rose bushes back in your estate. Quite curious why you didn't attempt to say hello."

He even remembers that too. You fiddled with the fabric of your dress, "My apologies. I'm not use to socializing so much."

“Is that so? I think you're not giving yourself enough credit," he complimented while shrugging, "This is much more entertaining than hanging in that insufferably crowded room, it was an unexpected occurence to meet you here of all places. However, I must say time can fly if I'm able to enjoy myself."

You shifted away from his stare, "You flatter me. We've only been talking for a few minutes."

"I have yet to realize it then" Hector's cheerfulness remains at stance despite your gloomy response. He leans forward like a curious child and tosses you a question, "Then allow me to ask, what brings you out here Lady (Y/n)? I don't see any reason when your family are such highly respected people of Fontaine."

"I'm not like them!" You retort instantly, causing the man to glance at you with skepticism, "I mean, I have nothing to do with them and they have nothing to do with me. That's just how it is. They already have Clement after all…"

Why am I telling him this?

"Ah your brother I assume. Yes so I've heard much about his genius mind. There were a few instances where he and I collaborated at Sumeru Academia," Hector speaks as if regarding to his unpleasant memories, "Although he never said anything about having a sister."

"We're not that close. And I'm not very fond of him," you confessed bluntly.

"Neither am I," Hector agreed with a scowl, "He claims his position using the knowledge derived from history books but never tries to think beyond the norm. That ignorant mindset of his will surely be his downfall one day."

"Ignorance can lead to anyone's downfall. If they turn a blind eye to the truth, so much can be taken from them," you paused shortly from rambling too much, "That's what I read in books at least."

"As expected of your lineage," he sighs whimsically, "Such avid readers."

"Well my family prefers documents and research. I've gone through them too but I will always love reading fiction."

"Ha! Seems you really are trying to be different from the rest of your family."

Seconds turn to minutes and minutes to hours, you had already forgotten about the cold breeze despite your dress being less than ideal for the outdoors. The man, although he can be a little to blathering at times, was more than what seemed to be on the surface. At first you thought of him as someone here to take advantage of your relations to your father but he seemed so sincere when listening to your stories, so eager while expressing his thoughts and even made you laugh a couple of times. You didn't realize that the clock had already struck twelve as the guests were preparing to leave but you just weren't ready to do the same.

"Until next time (Y/n)," he takes your fingers and pressed a kiss on top of them, though you were more struck by how he addressed you without honorifics, "I look forward to speaking with you again."

A warm smile graces your lips as you cursty, "Likewise Hector. Thank you for listening to me. I know I must have taken a long time."

Hector sneered but you already learned that it was simply his way of expressing amusement, "Hardly. I was thoroughly entertained."

When your parents found out about your meeting with him, they made it clear that you would never see him again. Hector Dufour-Lapointé is what he calls himself but the real name behind this man was Hector Valliere who came from a village hidden in the west of Fontaine. Rumours said that he was chased out of his hometown by an angry mob, claiming him to be a madman conducting unethical experiments on humans. Shortly after his arrival in Sumeru, he abandoned his past identity and replaced it with a new one in order to enter the academy under legal supervision. Associating with a man of a suspicious reputation would only cause harm to your family's name. Though you could barely care much about their reputation. There was nothing for you to benefit from it.

Few weeks have passed and you evetually gave up on the thought of hearing from Hector. They were only fleeting moments, nothing more. Your routine would stay the same as you kept on plucking more books off the shelves, killing whatever time you had. However the activities you used to enjoy somehow lost it's flair and there would be a slight pain in your chest whenever you turn to a page with the princess as she is surrounded by her friends. What exactly changed? Your family still treated you the same. Did you suddenly grow bored from doing the same thing everyday? Why is it that you feel much more lonelier despite being alone for so long? It was hard to tell in a singular perspective. If only there was someone here to give you some insights on things you couldn't see…

A silver bird lands by your front window and you nearly fell out of your chair as it flapped their wings violently. A machine?! They dropped what seems to be an envelope within the thick bushes before taking off and buzzing into the evening sky. You switched off the lock and lifted the glass within a single movement, snatching the piece of paper so that the wind wouldn't blow it away. Hastily you opened it. Both curious and cautious of why would anyone send you mail in such a discreet approach.

Chère Mademoiselle (Y/n),

I can only imagine the shock of your expression once reading this letter. I'm only writing to you since I assume that your father had already told you those nasty rumours about my past. No matter. I trust that you have a good head on your shoulders to not prejudge people using such miniscule details. I wish to speak with you again. Unless you have other plans staying in that stuffy room of yours, meet me behind the clock tower at 11:00 p.m. Don't be late.

Bien à vous,

"It really is him!" The happiness spreads all across your features as you clutched the letter to your chest. For some reason, your heart wouldn't stop racing. It was a simple yet thoughful action on his part but despite how short his greeting was, every word held the weight of a thousand sparks, "I…I can't stop smiling."

And without hesitation, you prepared to leave. No one noticed your absence.

-------

It was only halfway where you realized that Hector didn't give many details redgarding why he planned this sudden event. You caught sight of him standing under the roofs with his hands hidden behind his back. He had on his signature lopsided grin, brows uneven as he glanced at you casually.

"How very punctual, were you so eager that you couldn't wait?" He teases.

"I was surprised when your bird knocked upon my window," you inform, "Is it something urgent?"

"Not at all. I merely wanted to catch up with old times," Hector tilts forward to emphasize his suggestion, "Care to indulge me for a bit?"

You crossed your arms, "Then what is it that you're hiding behind your back?"

"Hmm?" He hums, "You mean this?"

"Ah!"

Roses. A bouquet of bright red flowers were presented to you, nicely wrapped in fabric. In the language of Fontaine, recieving them could mean multiple of things and you couldn't help but feel hesitant despite his thoughtful gesture, "Why are you giving me this?"

"Is it so wrong for me to be a gentleman? I thought it would be best to prepare you a gift after you put all that effort to come out in such a late hour," Hector mused to himself, "Especially when you had to make sure no prying eyes would catch us."

You let out a small laugh before accepting the bouquet, "I wouldn't go as far to say that."

"Oh?" Although it was hard to see, Hector managed to catch a glimpse of your flushed cheeks hidden behind the flowers. A darken smirk climbs onto his face at the inviting thought of what it could mean, "Tell me more."

The whole night you both spent walking around the empty plaza with only the stars as your guide. They paved a silver path reflected in the horizon above, free flowing like one of the many watercolour paintings hung in your chambers, uncertain where they may lead but you followed them regardless. If it weren't for Hector's inivtation you might have never known about the parts of your city due to the restricted lifestyle you lived. He listened to every one of them. The stories you had to tell when there was no one for you to talk to and the complaints about your brother whenever he wanted to snitch on your actions just to get the praise out of your father. You expressed your frustrations when speaking about your incompetences, joy after reading a good fairytale book written by your favourite author, there was so much to say that you were worried if Hector soon grew tired from them.

"Go on. I'm listening."

And your heart flutters again. Suddenly everything felt so light with each step you took, it was as if you walked across the stars in the sky rather than the heavy pavement of the ground you called your home. But even if happiness was a bliss, it tormented you. Because companionship made you realize how poor your were all along. That you had everything yet you had nothing, slowly withering away like the roses you held in your hand. Convinced that your existence was worth nothing more than nothing itself. Doomed to be dismissed and forgotten. Rotting away...Hector stays by your side as you cried softly into the night.

From a distance the bell rings and echoes just like the time before during Fontaine's grand ball. Hector shows you a secret route so that no one could find you.

"Will you write to me again?"

The request was so innocent, purely from genuine intentions and devoided of anything he had in mind. Hector would always laugh in these situations when things have gone unexpectedly yet pleasingly his way but held back knowing that it would be foolish to waste such a priceless opportunity. And so he gave you his smile, one full of secrets where you had mistakened it as a promise, "Of course my dear."

Every night you could no longer fall asleep since he had occupied your thoughts completely. Sometimes you'd dream of him and their tales would unfold similarly to the ones you have read. It gone to the point where the maids would have to wake you up during late afternoons due to the dramatic change in your sleep schedule. Though, you didn't care what they did to you. As long as no one found out about your secret rendezvous.

You never thought that there'd be a day where you would voluntarily give up reading your beloved fairytales. They were now replaced by a stash of his letters that have been accumulated over the past few months. You read them each day, pacing back and forth within the walls of your room, whispering his sentences as if he were the one saying them to you. He made you feel special. You were addicted to this feeling. Eventually you managed to memorize his words by heart.

The pages of your diary were filled with notes. Like your very own fairytale carved into reality. From the rose petal, now dried, to the hairpin he snatched from a distracted merchant and a single strand of his hair you found within your cloak after a warm embrace, all of these items, a remnant of the man you loved were taped up in these pages. Sometimes you could even feel his prescence because it was all you needed. It didn't matter if Clement threw insults about how worthless your existence was, your parents could lock you in this prison if they wanted to but they shall never take away Hector from you. Never. You swear it. He was your whole world and the prince who saved you from a life made of aching emptiness. You would do anything to keep him by your side. Anything to gain his affection.

Anything.

"I had a feeling that you were the culprit dear sister."

Your arms stutters as they clutched tightly on the scrolls you took off from the shelves. The light crept into the room like arms reaching out to clutch around your ankles, warning you for trespassing. You turned around dreadfully to see Clement pressing his shoulder against the doorframe with his arms folded and a wicked expression aimed at your pitiful state.

"Why…Why are you still awake?" You say in disbelief, "I thought everyone was asleep."

"Please. Not only are you shameless but hypocritical as well. You truly are a dissapointment to our family."

"Wait," taking a step forward, you stopped him before he makes his exit, "I'll put them back. Just don't tell father about this."

But like your parents, your brother was unkind. Clement doubles over and hugs his torso, cackling through his teeth, "Is that how it is?" He swipes his arm up and you see a parchment paper held between his fingers.

"No!"

"Ma chérie (Y/n). I must say all this tenacious effort of sneaking in my letters to your window is becoming more and more tiresome. But of course, you are an exception. I want the scrolls you've mentioned the other day at my lair tomorrow evening. Make sure no one discovers this. I'm counting on you. Cordialement! Hector."

"No…" you whispered, feeling the weight of the world fall upon your shoulders as it shattered apart. Hector. If possible, you hoped that the pieces could just crush you right then and there. Your knees felt weak and a fright takes over but despite your turmoil, Clement didn't show a shred of sympathy.

"So this is why you've been acting odd lately. Pathetic," he flaps the paper tauntingly in his grasp, "I can't decide if I should be impressed or baffled by your actions. A secret romance with a criminal and the bloodline of Fontaine's most respected government associates? Even though you've hit rock bottom, you still decided to dig deeper."

"Clement you don't understand!" Stumbling upon your footsteps, you desperately tried to convey your predicament even if it meant feeding his ego, "Hector is not the man you think. He was shunned by the people of his hometown, treating him as if he were nothing. They…They ignored him! All this time he needed someone to recognize his brilliance, someone to understand." Shakily, you brought your tensed arms to your chest and screamed a silent whisper, "Someone to listen but no one did. He must have felt so alone…"

Clement flinches when you suddenly clutched onto his biceps. When he looked into your eyes, a shiver ran down his spine.

"Hector is counting on me. I'm the only one who can save him. No one else. He needs me Clement, he needs me!"

"Tch."

An ear-splitting scream of his hand against your face echoes across the room. It knocked you out of your stance and you bumped into the table, grunting while the scrolls to tumbled to the floor.

"Crazy woman, I'm embarassed to be related to you!"

While you were still trying to regain your balance, your brother had already ran off. It wouldn't be long before he alerted your parents, the clock ticking away like sand until the final hour leaves you with nothing but an empty glass.

"No," despair swallows the strength away from your legs and you crawled towards where he used to stand, "Don't take him away from me…I need him…"

I can't live without him.

Tears begin to form by the corners of your eyes as you clenched your teeth. This was no time to cry. Balling your fists, you sprinted out of the room, pushing whatever stood in your way as if you were running for your life.

And if you considered everything else, it wasn't that far from the truth.

-------

"Hector! Hector are you there?" After arriving upon his house, you began knocking on his door aggressively. The lock clicks and you were greeted by an evidently annoyed man gnawing his teeth together.

"Tsk. There better be a good reason-"

"They're coming for us! We have to go. Now. Before it's too late. My father is probably already waking and making arrangements for you to-"

"Enough, I can't even catch what you're saying," He pinches the bridge of his nose while you were still stuck in a frenzy state. He takes a step back and opens the door wider, gesturing for you to come inside, "Get in already. I have a feeling that this will be a long night."

Hector observes intently at the words you tell him.

Not out of concern but akin to the way he watches the insects react when he exposes them to a different environment.

He was a scientist after all. A madman in which you deliberately fell in love with, so much to the point that he was able to feel pity for once. How you trusted him wholeheartedly with all of your vulnerabilities, emotions and secrets like handing him your parts just so he could put you back together again. Tinkering was always one of his favourite hobbies and he couldn't help but feel a twisted sense of pride at the thought of you being completely wrapped around his finger.

Perhaps that was the reason why he loved you. Because he didn't love you. He loved you in parts.

"It was only a matter of time," Hector sighs. He sneaks his grasp into yours, knowing how much it affects you and puts on an invisible mask of deciet, "I already knew this day would happen long before anyone could have predicted it."

"You did?" With worried eyes you gazed at him, "What shall we do then?"

Knowing he hit the target, his lips begin to curl up towards his ears, showing his sharp white teeth that shone against the dim-litted room. Hector asks, "Do you love me?"

A silly question. You didn't hesitate to answer, "Of course I do. I've said it many times."

"Prove it to me," Forcing his forehead against yours, Hector commands in a dangerously low tone, "Kill your brother and only then you can truly be mine."

Your brain sutters, trying to absorb what he had just said. Kill? As in to take a life? It sounded wrong. But...was it wrong if the life belonged to someone who ruined yours?

Dumbfoundedly, you glanced into the bloody orbs of your lover, his black pupils thinning into knives while burning in the hellfire of his true colours. Hector runs a hand from the scalp of your hair, down to your cheek before gingerly sliding his fingers at your jawline. He pulled you close and whispered into your ear.

"Are you scared?"

Ah, this wasn't about your feelings. This was about him and your future and there could be no future you without him by your side.

You let your eyelids drop and leaned into his touch, "I could never be scared of you Hector. Whether it is within my power or not, I will make sure no one gets in our way. I swear it."

"Good," he continues to have you feed on his affection, "I knew I could count on you."

-----------

The news of your brother's death filled every headline Fontain had to offer. He was driven off a cliff while making a trip towards Sumeru. No one survived. The remains were so crushed to the point that authorities had trouble identifying their bodies. The only explanation they could come up with by observing the leftover tracks was that the horse must have gone out of control and ended up dragging the carriage along with it.

Ha. Serves him right.

Food poisoning. The vial Hector made was very effective. You made sure to bury it away from your mansion.

With no other choice, you became your family's next heir. Hector notifies you that he would be away for several months to solidify a unique connection with a man hailing from Snezhnaya. You didn't think he would arrive at your doorsteps with so much authority. Fatui soldiers followed from behind as the staff paved a way for them to enter. Your father was clearly displeased by his outrageous approach but he knew he was in no place to deny.

"Upon the agreement between Fontaine and Snezhnaya, Lady (Y/n) will become Harbinger Il Dottore's wife," the Duke announces, "This news will be publicly announced at the end of October."

Dottore? Is that what he calls himself?

As if claiming his victory, Dottore shoots your father a devilish smile. You could feel the dining table shake when he kept pressing his fist against the smooth surface, begrudingly congratulating you both for the new engagement. Your mother bursted into tears.

Was it worth it?

You watched both of your parents mourn silently in their own manner. Perfectly knowing that you were the main cause. But you weren't able to feel any sadness because in the end, you now had everything you've ever wanted.

The inheritance.

Their attention.

But most of all, him.

And when you were convinced that this was your happily ever after, that fairytales were not just beautiful lies for the sake of comfort, you didn't realize you were already living a life made of beautiful lies conjured by your own mind for the sake of your own comfort.

"You're nothing without me."

Dried and calloused hands squeezed around your throat as you flailed your legs against the soft fabric of the carpet floor. He encases you in a straddling position, enjoying the sight of your tortured and clenched face. Hector…no, Dottore hated it when you disobeyed him. He despised it when his creations don't work the way he wanted them to and he had no use for things that are broken.

"G-hka--k..-"

"How many times do I have to remind you to not use my birthname. Do those ears of you even function properly? Or must I fix them myself?"

You gasped for air when he relaxed his grip. Vision a blur, you coughed a few times before he pulls your arm so that you lay flushed against his chest.

"Don't forget who saved you dear (Y/n). Because of me you were able to escape that miserable life you've despised for years. I expect the utmost gratitude on your part at all times, it is only fair that I punish you for not meeting my requirements, don't you agree?" Dottore lifts his hand up to pinch your cheeks, pulling your head to stare at your eyes, "After all, there is no one else in this world who can put up with you…but me."

His words were poison in which you drank like a woman starved. It made you feel numb to the pain the more you drowned in their alluring scent, the taste was sweet, a remedy for the bitterness of reality where the man of your dreams was nothing but a cruel monster. You came to believe that the reason why he treated you so harshly was because he was scared of losing you. You were caught in the trap of what seemed to be love and devotion when truly, you were just a toy to be used at a means end. He breaks you and he puts you back together, over and over again, filling in between the cracks formed in your glass heart with the phrases you loved to hear. Just like how he filled the other holes of your life where no one else did. You called it kindness. He saw it as entertainment.

Most people pay attention to the flower's beauty but they never acknowledge the thorns hidden beneath it's blossom. That is why they bleed. They get hurt. Though, you didn't mind shedding blood if it was for his sake.

Because you would do anything for him.

You would do anything to bring back the memories of Hector Dufour-Lapointé and save him from the Harbinger that ruined his life. Your life. It wasn't his fault. You knew you could change him to what he was before because you were in love with him, that he might still in there. Somewhere.

Right?

…

Please come back.

Time continues to flow like the tears of your dying heart despite yearning for it to turn at the past. Dottore already left the room a long time ago but you didn't. Raising your head away from your hands, you peered at the door in front of you, begging desperately through a chanting record of despondence.

Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back.

Images, they slipped through your fingers, slowly becoming more distant until your mind began to see them as illusions. Dreams. Things that were not real. Telling you that your life was a lie.

"Come back to me…Hector."

Because the man you loved was withering in your memories and you couldn't do anything to save him.

A dry croak robbed you of your breath as you turned to look in the mirror.

Worthless. You were always worthless, it was what your parents told you since birth. It was what you became when he wasn't at your side because without him, your existence was worthless. You lied for him, you stole for him you, took a life for him. You destroyed yourself for him to point that it was hard to believe you were even looking at yourself.

Worthless. It's who I am.

And despite it all, you couldn't obtain his love.

(Crack).

Worthless things don’t deserved to be loved.

(Crack. Crack).

But what if it’s because I’m worthless, that he won’t love me back?

(Crack).

Your eyes jolted open, causing you to gasp sharply. When the sweet lies dispersed in your head and cleansed you of deceit, everything started to make sene. You came to realize why your wish was impossible all along.

Dottore...no, Hector, the reason wasn't because he didn't return your feelings. Neither was it due to the fact that he hurt you through his actions. Nor when he made you cry or scream for help before feeding you with more lies, thinking he would never hurt you again. It was none of those things.

It was because the man you loved this whole time was someone who could love no one but himself.

"Ha...haha," sucking in your breath, a sinister laugh escapes your mouth, "Hahahahahahaha.....!"

Everything was worthless.

You grabbed a nearby hairbrush and threw it at the mirror, watching yourself shatter into a million pieces.

There was only one thing left to do.

------

"Ugh, where is it?!"

It was late into the night where every staff had gone to sleep. The Harbinger fumbles with his keys while standing at the door of his basement as he was too busy proceeding with his research rather than considering the thought of rest. Usually he acted upon them on his own will, performing various experiments for enjoyment. However, ever since the Snezhnayan court had requested him to look into the ancient arts of alchemy, Dottore was forced to carry it out before the deadline approached. Otherwise his position as Harbinger would be revoked.

"What a bunch of self-centered blockheads. Can't they understand that it take quality time to get quality results?"

Most of his important documents were stored on the otherside. Half of it came from his father-in-law's library. He had you to thank for that.

"Ah finally," he mutters, though still dissatisfied, "I should have a word with my butler for misplacing them."

Dottore shoves the key into the lock but instead of twisting the knob he noticed something strange. It was old and had yet to be fixed but somehow he didn't have any trouble adjusting his wrist. Then he saw there were a set of freshly made fingerprints upon the smooth metallic surface. However, the only person awake at this time would be him-

An intruder!

Dottore drops everything to the ground and yanks the door open. He skittered down the stone stairs while cursing under his breath. Using the delusion gifted by the Tsaritsa, the Harbinger activated his lazer-like pillars as he took advantage of their glow to light up the unlit room.

"What in the abyss...?!"

Except it wasn't dark.

"All of these scrolls, I recognize them," without sparing a single glance, you spoke nostalgically towards the bookshelves, "It brings me so much memories..."

Dottore clenches his teeth together as his eyes shone an angry red, you were holding a torch dangerously close to his hard-earned collection, "What do you think you're doing?!" He fumed, "Put that out, AT ONCE! Don't make me repeat myself!

"They're precious to you aren't they?" You finally shifted to face him, "More than me."

"What has gotten into you?" He was about to hurl at you until he saw your torch lowering, causing him to retreat. You were strangely noncholant and he couldn't help the feeling of disturbance. Accepting that he didn't have the upperhand, Dottore decided to use a different approach, "(Y/n)."

The sound of your name falls from his lips. You faltered.

"I'm sorry for what I have done. I know I was dishonourable to you, as your husband and lover, and that you didn't deserve to see me so aggressive. You have every right to express your anger, my dear. I was in the wrong."

It was only a mask. You knew it well. But seeing him with softened eyes and a tone so comforting, made you desperately wanting to run into his arms so he could wipe away your sorrows just like once upon a time. To live happily ever after.

Hector.

Dottore runs his fingers through his hairstrands in frustration and sighs, "However the Tsarista needed me to do something very important and I can't seem to fulfill her request no matter how hard I try. It angers me. If I don't finish this, there would be no place for us to stay."

"Hector..." you sniffled quietly. He looks so much like him right now.

"Can't you see I'm doing this for you?" He consoles, yet his weapons still remain, "I only intended to make you happy and there's nothing I won't do to achieve that. How about I show-"

"Enough."

Dottore froze upon your sudden command. He didn't sense a hint of subjugation and it seemed that you had perfect control of your emotions. How very inquisitive. Did you grow immune to the style of his voice? In such a short period of time? The facade he had on was now replaced with a growling animal-like expression. You looked at him dissapointedly. His Harbinger self returned. Hector was no more.

"Ha, you're the same as always. Even before the time you became a Harbinger. The same man that I fell in love with but it is me who will never be the same again," For a moment you averted your gaze as if trying hard to swallow your own words, "Remember when we first met at the balcony? That I told you my favourite books to read are fiction? I knew they weren't real but deep down, I wanted to believe in them anyways. And you know what? They did come true, to some degree..."

As the memories come flashing back, he defenselessly watches your expression contort from sadness to a calm contemplation and finally, enraged disgust, "But you only ever brought me pain and I'm sick of it!"

Swaying the torch to the side, Dottore flinches forward but he didn't dare to come close when your current state was unpredictable to him, "I JUST WANTED YOU TO LOVE ME," you wail, I just wanted to be loved, bringing a clawed hand against your forehead and trembling upon contact, "It's all that I ask for..."

Dottore narrowed his brows. Perhaps he may have gotten too far.

"But I know it's impossible. The world is a cruel place and there's no point in trying anymore. That is why I'm going to set us free."

"...What do you mean?"

You shut your eyes closed and tossed the flaming torch to the ground. A horrified expression takes over his features. It didn't take long for the fire to begin spreading amongst the room.

"NO!" Dottore yelled powerfully, he frantically darts his gaze at all directions as they continued to flicker and blend into his precious documents. You stood still and watched him grab the ones that were intact, savouring the most he could but they slip out of his arms every time he moved. Dottore glances behind him to see a rising cage of hellfire. Then he turns to you.

" 'Til death do us part!" you laughed maniacally.

The madman looked back with angry dismay, "You're out of your mind!"

Abandoning whatever he held in his hand, Dottore spins around towards the staircase. He covers his face with his sleeve and did whatever he could to prevent the fire from touching him. However, he accidentally stumbled on his footsteps and something fell off the heights, knocking him in the face. He grunts painfully.

"That will leave a scar," you smile while he clutches at his injury, "I can break you too.”

Just like how you broke me.

Knowing that you've managed to leave a mark of your existence on him in someway, you peacefully watched your lover wobble between the hell you created. But the hell you knew was not made of scorching heat and thundering flames. Hell was empty. Hell was a void. This feeling was far too gentle to be considered hell. If he can't return your love, then at least let these caging arms bask you in the warmth you’ve always desired.

Lifting your head, you looked towards the ceiling and closed your eyes.

Ah, this cannot be death.

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appleflavoredkitkats · 3 years ago

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gonna talk about quackity and las nevadas real quick— fair warning, this is not cohesive as i am rambling this from the top of my head, but i wanted to relay my thoughts on them because i just. love them so much.

also this basically turned into “what is quackity's character arc and why is the las nevadas crew important to quackity's arc”

all people mentioned are of their dsmp counterparts unless said otherwise /dsmp /rp

tw: mentions of torture, violence

quackity is not a character who is only rooted in maliciousness. i can acknowledge that he is, scarily, one of the best manipulators of the smp, but his intentions and the reason las nevadas was made are not rooted in maliciousness. before the election results, we know that wilbur and quackity had a discussion about peace and change in the smp. quackity's reason for running was because he wanted to be the one to bring a positive shift in the smp. he wanted to garner a sense of belongingness in the smp because he felt excluded by l'manberg. upon hearing this, wilbur slaps him with the real truth about the dsmp— it is not controlled by pacifism. it can never be controlled by pacifism. if quackity wanted to make an impact, he needed power, and to acquire power, he needed to be violent.

which is why he does the things he does right now. his torturing of dream, his manipulation of his friends, him creating a gambling ground in general— he does that all to contribute to his plans of being revered. the main question we can garner from all this is: what's his end goal? i've been pondering about this for months on end now, and i still can't pinpoint what he wants to do with his power once he acquires it. all we can conclude is that he still wants to impact the smp one way or another, and that he is immensely determined to execute his plan perfectly. a guess of mine is that he still genuinely wants to bring peace in this server, to create a conflict so loud that it ends all conflicts. but to be honest, i could also see his end goal being less of “make the smp better” and more of a “let me guarantee the safety of myself and my loved ones” because at the beginning, we knew las nevadas was supposed to be made for him and the rest of el rapids, but we all know what happened. so now, he has different people in his crew that might substitute el rapids as other potential family he can care about? who knows! i do think it has to be related to the concept of belongingness somehow, because that theme is prevalent in both possibilities. also, something something, the plan's perfect execution may also become his legacy, something something. you get the idea.

which is actually funny because i remember that cc!quackity himself has expressed his own purpose in life in his alt streams, and it's quite the opposite of his own character's. he's stated numerous times that he intends to just… enjoy life. he was gifted one life to spent, and he'll just have fun with it. do what makes him happy. no legacies, no everlasting impacts on society— just his own happiness and wellbeing. and to me, i think cc!quackity is trying to make this ideology something his character eventually acquires in the future. the state of the dream smp shouldn't fall into the hands of quackity. it was never his responsibility to fix in the first place. he could have just left, he could have just enjoyed his life, but quackity seems so fixated in the idea of a possible shift in the smp. he wants to make as much noise as possible.

which is also funny because like, he doesn't have to! and interestingly enough, charlie mentions it. charlie has been continuously mentioning that everyone turns into dust anyway. charlie has seen lots of violent events throughout history, but he always seems to suggest that it's pointless because again, we all turn to dust. that belief is such a foil to quackity's belief of leaving a stamp on the smp because charlie suggests that it does not matter. quackity can make as much noise as possible yet still turn into the same kind of dust that silent people will turn into as well. it does not. matter. he should not be this fixated on his legacy and impact when it's not only going to be potentially meaningless, but it has also been hurting many other people as well.

but how will he eventually learn to believe in this ideology?

well, knowing that charlie was the first one to bring it up, i fully believe the las nevadas crew will be responsible for quackity's potential healing arc. las nevadas' crew is interesting because it feels like an anti-found-family family that fits in perfectly with actual found families. they were definitely manipulated into thinking joining las nevadas was a life or death situation, but what's interesting is that the same dreadful aura from las nevadas' third episode does not… continue on for the rest of the las nevadas streams? quite frankly, their streams have been pretty pleasant. of course, quackity still prioritizes his country over his people, but that doesn't mean he does not care about them at all. the fact that he's willing to recruit them and possibly share the legacy once his plans go smoothly shows that he does care about them to an extent.

but even if quackity manipulated them into joining, the crew has not been controlled by quackity in any other way afterwards. in fact, it seems like these people have been actually finding something purposeful and fulfilling from their stay there. like, fundy, foolish, charlie, and purpled genuinely seem like they're enjoying their time with one another. they don't degrade each other, they don't infantilize or hurt or insult each other; they actually seem like they enjoy each other's presence. sure, quackity promised them a legacy, but they themselves have kind of found a bigger purpose outside of legacy in las nevadas: belongingness, togetherness.

and i want quackity to realize that. because we already know that cc!quackity's probably gonna apply his own life philosophy into his character, but there needs to be a reason as to why he gets to that point. at the moment, those who craved for legacies in las nevadas seems to be slowly just… enjoying their time there because of the people they meet. the people they begin caring for. i 100% bet that later on, these people will stop caring about their legacy and begin caring for las nevadas for the people there that gave them purpose outside of making as much noise as possible.

and i want quackity to be one of those people to lets go of the concept of legacies and impacts. i bet that las nevadas will experience hell back to back, but he will have his crew members to fight alongside him everyday. he thinks that they're there because he manipulated them enough, but he slowly realizes that that's not the case— maybe at a point where las nevadas is at its lowest, quackity tells them that they can leave, that this was not the las nevadas he promised them. quackity tells them that there's no way they can ever gain proper legacies from it, but to his surprise, the crew stays. not because they still think las nevadas can provide them a proper legacy, but because they found a better purpose from las nevadas outside of legacies and impacts— and to them, quackity brought them together, and they're thankful for it. quackity delivered this opportunity for them, and now, the rest of the crew is giving quackity his own opportunity to find his own purpose. not in las nevadas in particular, but in them. he does not need to change the entire state of the smp to gain a sense of belongingness like he wanted during the elections— he can just find it through them, and that should be enough for him.

#mcyt #dream smp #quackity #fundy #awesamdude #slimecicle #purpled #foolish__gamers #long post #dream smp analysis

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jaewin97 · 4 years ago

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Do you hate me?

You have a feeling Taeyong hates you and Taeyong hates himself for feeling the way he does, especially because of Donghyuck.

word count: around 2100

fluff, misunderstandings, mutual pining (?)

A/N: I kind of quickly proofread it, so sorry if there are any mistakes!

Upon hearing the ringing of the doorbell Donghyuck is quick to run out from his room towards the front door, almost falling on his butt as his socks slide across the wooden floor.

Taeyong, who was having his meal at the kitchen table, almost chokes on his food at the sudden commotion and turns to watch the younger boy with a bewildered expression, ready to yell at him for running in the dorms. But as Donghyuck opens the door, albeit a little out of breath with a wide grin plastered on his face, he simply closes his mouth again and is quick to straighten himself as best he can as he registers who's at the door by Donghyuck's loud greeting.

"Baby!"

"Hey cub!" he hears you say followed by a sweet giggle. He assumes Donghyuck has you locked in a strong hug as you let out an 'oof'. He internally curses as he turns back to his food and sees that he had splattered some rice on the table as he was choking. Taeyong quickly gets up and grabs a napkin making sure to clean up as he hears you and Donghyuck walking towards the kitchen.

"Oh! Taeyong hyung, I didn't notice you were here!" Donghyuck exclaims as he finally reaches the kitchen with you in tow. "YN came to visit me today!"

"Hello" you softly say, as you timidly bow towards Taeyong.

"Oh um, hi" Taeyong replies as he sets his gaze on you. You looked absolutely adorable, dressed in black jeans and what looked to be an oversized hoodie. As he took in your appearance his gaze lowered down and he realized that your hand was interlocked with Donghyuck's hand. Taeyong felt his face heat up as he quickly looked away and grabbed his plates which still had plenty of food in them and placed them in the kitchen sink.

"I- I have to go change. Sorry. Um, it was nice seeing you" he quickly said as he looked down and made his way towards his room. A loud slam from Taeyong closing his door resonated in the dorms causing you and Hyuck to slightly jump.

"That was so weird. He was already dressed" Donghyuck commented as he let go of your hand and made his way to the refrigerator. "Do you want anything to drink?" he asked.

You stood in your spot not understanding what had happened. You thought back to plenty of other times where Taeyong had also abruptly left when you had arrived or when it looked like he was uncomfortable to be in your presence.

Maybe he doesn't like me? Or what if he thinks I'm annoying? Could it be because I'm younger and he finds me immature or loud when I'm with Donghyuck? All these questions flooded your head and you decided it was best to just ask the man in question. You didn't want him to be uncomfortable in his own home and you didn't want to cause any discomfort with him and Hyuck.

"I think he hates me."

You heard a pained groan as Hyuck quickly shot up and hit his head on the refrigerator.

"Ah fuck" he whined as he turned to you with a pout causing you to walk over and stand in front of him. He slightly bent down to your level as you reached a hand out to rub the spot he had hit.

"Why do you say that?" Hyuck asked.

"I'll tell you in your room" you sighed as he stood straight and nodded, motioning for you to follow him down the hallway.

Once you reached his room, Donghyuck proceeded to close his door and play some music from his speaker in case anyone heard you two talking. You proceed to tell him your thoughts as you both laid in his bed staring at the ceiling.

"I don't think he hates you. I think it's the opposite but I for sure think you should talk to him about it if it bothers you or if you think it bothers him" Hyuck responded once you were done.

"What do you mean it's the opposite?" you asked as you turned to face him.

Hyuck sighed and opened his mouth to answer when his room door opened.

"Oh! I'm so sorry, I thought Johnny was here."

You both looked towards the door as you saw Taeyong standing there before he quickly made eye contact with you and quickly turned around and left.

"See!" you whined as you turned to look at Donghyuck with a pout earning a laugh from the boy.

"Go talk to him" he exclaimed, shoving you off his bed and pulling out his phone.

"B-but"

"No 'buts' yn. Do it or else I'll call him in here and all three of us can talk about it" he glared as you begrudgingly walked to his door.

"You're so evil," you said, sticking your tongue out at him, causing him to smirk and wink at you.

You exited his room and made your way towards Taeyong's, mentally planning out what you were going to say to him. Before you chickened yourself out, you knocked on his door as soon as you reached it.

A soft "come in" was heard as you shakily turned the handle and walked in.

Taeyong stood in the corner of his room watering his plants with his back to you. After hearing you softly clear your throat his head snapped towards you.

"O-oh yn. U-um what's wrong?" he stammered as he put the water bottle he was using to water his plant down on his desk and wiped his hands on his jeans.

"I um... I wanted to talk to you about something" you gulped.

"Of course! Have a seat" he pointed to his desk chair near him. You timidly nodded and made your way over. You felt like you could taste the awkwardness that was in the air and it caused your hands to begin to get clammy.

Taeyong muttered a quick 'give me one second' before he walked out of his room and came back in a few seconds later with a dining table chair. He set it slightly next to the desk chair which you were sitting on and he took a seat.

"So what's wrong?" he shyly asked, making quick eye contact with you before looking down at his hands.

"Do you hate me?"

His head quickly snapped up as he stared at you in shock.

"What? No! Why would you ask that?"

"I just- I'm sorry. It's just whenever I'm near you, you either leave or look really uncomfortable. I just wanted to apologize for making you feel this way and I wanted to ask you so I can figure out what it is I can do to make you feel comfortable" you responded feeling your cheeks heat up as his gaze held yours. His eyes scanned yours over and over as he furrowed his brows and locked his jaw.

"I'm the one who should be apologizing. You did nothing wrong, you could never do anything wrong. I'm just an idiot. I've just been trying to sort some stuff out when it comes to you- I mean it's nothing like you causing me trouble or anything it's the opposite! I mean- wait! I don't want to hurt you or Donghyuck. I could never do that to him" he rambled.

Your brain was trying to process what just happened. Did he confess? Or are you reading into it? Hurt me or Donghyuck? What?

"I'm- wait. I'm so confused. So is it just that you don't like me? You're trying to figure out how to be around someone you don't like? If it's something I said or did I'm sor-"

"No!" he quickly cut you off. "I don't know how to express myself with you. I'm sorry. This is so frustrating. I know what I feel. I know what I want to say, what I want to do. It's just- whenever I'm near you my brain malfunctions and I act like a complete idiot." he confesses looking down at his hands again, noticing they were slightly shaking.

"Taeyong I don't understand" you whispered.

Taeyong took in a deep breath and nodded.

"I like you. I like you a lot and I know you and Donghyuck have something going on and I don't want to ruin it. He's my little brother and I would never do anything to purposely hurt him. I hate myself knowing I could potentially hurt him because I can't control my feelings." He didn't dare move an inch as he finally let out what he had been holding in. He squeezed his eyes shut as he realized you hadn't said anything for almost a minute after he had finished speaking.

"Nothing is going on with me and Donghyuck. "

Hearing this he finally looked up at you. You were staring at him with watery eyes and rosy pink cheeks, he swore his heart almost leaped out of his chest.

"But you guys always call each other baby or couple nicknames and you're always together and-"

"He's like my little brother" you cut him off, gaining the courage to reach a shaky hand and grab one of Taeyong's. "I'm a year older than him and since all of you are males and his siblings are young he needs an older sister's advice sometimes when it comes to struggles he may be facing or just asking how to approach girls."

Taeyong's mouth opened and closed as he processed what you just told him, the feeling of your hand in his wasn't helping him either.

"so... oh." he let out as he felt his face heat up.

"I like you too."

Hearing those four worlds caused Taeyong's world to stop. His heart was beating so fast and he felt like his face was literally on fire. He bravely looked up and met your gaze which conveyed sincerity and determination. Your own cheeks were a darker shade of red and your chest rose and fell at the same rate his did.

"Really?" he managed to ask in a slight tremble.

"Yes. I have since day one" you responded sincerely.

"Wow. I- I don't know what to say" he let out a shy giggle "I never thought you would feel the same way. I mean, I thought about the 1% chance that you maybe could see me in a different way other than your friend or Donghyuckie's leader but then I always shook it out of my thoughts. So I really have no clue what to do. My mind and heart are both racing if I'm honest. I think I'm in shock."

You let out a giggle as Taeyong's eyes widened and he placed his left hand on top of his heart. He looked up at you and let out a big smile.

"You're so cute," he said.

"I should be telling you that" you said shaking your head as you felt yourself become even more shy if that was possible.

"You have no idea how crazy you drive me." he whispered as he timidly grabbed your hands in his and slightly leaned forward.

You felt your mouth dry up as you felt him rub small circles on the back of your hand.

"I want to take you out. Can I?" he asked looking up at you with a small smile.

You could only nod as you both leaned closer to one another. Your eyes flickered from his eyes to his cute pouty lips as you swallowed.

"Can I kiss you?" you whispered as his eyes bulged out and he shyly nodded.

You could feel his shaky breath as he licked his lips and placed a hand on your cheek. You slowly brought one of your hands and placed it on the side of his neck, gently running your fingers along it.

You closed your eyes and then you felt it. His soft lips gently molded with yours. Your heart skipped not one but two beats as you realized that you were finally kissing him. Taeyong was in cloud nine. He couldn't believe he was finally kissing you! He wished for this for what felt like forever and now here he was, he couldn't help but smile into the kiss as he finally realized that his wish came true. He could finally call you his, kiss you whenever he wanted and be able to give you all his love unconditionally. This was to be the start of something the both of you would look back on and recount to your future grandchildren. The story of how you both got together and fell in love.

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musicallisto · 4 years ago

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Congratulations!! :DD Could I have a vanilla milkshake for Harry Potter (Golden trio era) please? I’m a introverted straight female, 5’5. Personality-wise, I am really shy when first meeting people, not rude, just quiet and more of listener than a talker. When I open up I’m much more bubbly, sarcastic (playfully), and talkative. I’m very empathetic, laidback and open minded and extremely loyal to everyone in my life. I have a good sense of humour and laugh at most jokes and like some fun banter back and forth :P. I’m also a pretty stubborn person and never get swayed by peer pressure even though I’m extremely insecure regarding my personality, appearance and how I’m viewed by other people. I need to time to recharge after and sometimes during social events and am content with just listening to the other person/people speak to/around me. Bad traits of mine would be, tendency to overwork myself with schoolwork and study, get stressed easily and overanalyse everything (social stuff mostly). Likes: Drawing, Music, Singing, Going on walks and Reading. Dislikes: The Dark (horrible phobia), Bugs, Spiders and Overly Aggressive, Loud and Pushy people. Hufflepuff and ISFP-T if that helps :P.

hi! here’s your vanilla milkshake, I hope you enjoy it! I think neville longbottom would really appreciate your personality and every trait of your character...

Neville is pretty intimidated by... everything, to be honest, when he first arrives at Hogwarts.

But if there’s one thing that radiates comfort and peace, and manages to cheer him up and be a beacon of light in the darkness of the unknown, it’s you.

Although you met at Hogwarts, he gets the feeling that you’ve known each other all your lives. It’s so easy to fall into conversation with you.

Mostly, he truly appreciates how you let him ramble about plants and flowers and botany in general without mocking him for being a “nerd” with “nerd interests”. As much as he appreciates his Gryffindor friends... they can be a little bit close-minded at times.

And everyone can’t adore Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions like they do. Botanics is his thing, and you will happily listen to him talk about this new herbal remedy from Patagonia he just read about in a book.

He even gifts you flowers and little succulents from to time; most often they’re just Muggle potted plants, because keeping magical plants in a dorm seems like a safety hazard waiting to happen, and you can never know what tricks these plants have up their sleeve. But he knows that you love taking care of plants, talking to them and watering them with great care and tenderness, and it warms his heart to see you actually be thoughtful with something that means so much to him.

You also spend a lot of your free time together in the greenhouses - because Professor Sprout loves you both, you for your dedication and quick wit, and him for his passion for the subject, so she trusts you with almost unrestrained access to the plants. He’ll tell you the magical properties of every single plant and the optimal conditions for their cultivation...

... blushing a little bit whenever he gets to one plant that symbolizes love or affection in wizarding culture.

And it takes you quite some time to catch on, because you’re so close to Neville - almost too close, and he’s your dearest friend, to the point that you’re not shy with him, and that you’d willingly spend hours with him just to playfully tease him - so you never considered him a potential romantic partner.

He was always cute, of course, and thoughtful, and selfless, and he admired you and respected you more than anyone in the world...

... but for some reason you couldn’t truly bypass your mental “best friend” barrier.

Until the day of your Defense Against the Dark Arts N.E.W.T.

You had revised and worked tenaciously, all year long, so as to not be caught off guard by a spell you didn’t master or a technique you couldn’t replicate. You had practised a hundred times, even with the most vile monsters...

... but on D-Day, the Dementor trial was almost too much for you to handle. Sure, you hadn’t slept properly for a week and had driven yourself to the brink of overexhaustion for these exams, and you had been swimming in your stress for the better part of the week as well - but normally you would be able to conjure a Patronus without too much difficulty.

Except when the Dementor took the shape of a black void, a gigantic starless expanse, like an Obscurus waiting to devour you as well as all the light in the world... you thought your heart would stop, and you’d drop your wand in the infinite darkness.

You had forgotten the memory you needed to conjure to chase the Dementor away - you had forgotten almost everything... but you hadn’t forgotten Neville’s voice, and it suddenly rung out in the middle of the overpowering night.

“You can do it. I believe in you.”

“No, Neville, I’m going to fall off!”

“I promise you won’t! Look at me, if I can do it, you can do it too!”

“Will you stay close to me?”

“All the time.”

It was the first time you had ridden a broom - you hadn’t taken the classes during your first year, leaving you a little delayed compared to your classmates, and over the summer Neville had volunteered to teach you. No one else would - you were both the “lost causes” that no one wanted to bother with.

But not Neville. He knew exactly what it was to feel like a lost cause, and he’d never wish it on anyone - especially not you, who was the most wonderful and incredible person he’d ever met.

He had held your hand the whole time, as he promised, and the gesture was born of children’s comfort, but as you recalled the memory, it warmed your chest with something infinitely more powerful.

The Patronus you produced was the strongest you had ever seen.

After the end of the examination, you ran into the corridors until you stumbled upon exactly who you were looking for.

“How did it go?”

And you kissed Neville square on the mouth, in the middle of the hallway.

You had no idea what had come over you at that moment, to be honest. There was no way in hell you would have done something so exuberant and public if you had been in your right mind.

But you were so elated, drunk on this feeling of victory and realization - you wanted Neville to be more than a friend, and unconsciously in your mind he had always been more -, that you let yourself be carried by the flow of your emotions.

“... Wow, I wasn’t expecting that.”

“It went great.”

Oh that it did.

800 follower sleepover CLOSED!

#anon #800sleepover #ship request #hp #neville longbottom #neville longbottom headcanons #harry potter headcanons #hp headcanons #neville longbottom x reader

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knickynoo · 4 years ago

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BTTF Headcanons

As suggested by the wonderful @tsukinikawatteus, I’ve put together some of my headcanons. Honestly, these are going to revolve solely around Doc & Marty, because I don’t really have any developed ones involving other characters.

I’ll hide it under a ‘read more ’ in case it gets too long and ramble-y. Which it will, because this is me we’re talking about.

First, I’ll answer the ones I got in the ask.

- How Doc & Marty met: For this one, I just go by the official Bob Gale answer that Marty was 13 or 14, had heard rumors about the crazy old scientist in town, & snuck into Doc’s lab one day & got caught. The comic series actually shows this event happening, but I tend to dismiss that version because honestly, I don’t like the way it’s handled. (Plus Bob Gale has said that the comics/game/etc can be take it or leave it as considered canon, so yay) Anyway, I imagine a young Marty hearing all these whispers around town about Doc and being curious. Maybe he was looking for danger/adventure in going to investigate, but I also like to think that part of Marty felt sorry for this guy who everyone seemed to look down on. So he made his way over to Doc’s lab to see what the deal was & was initially scared when he got caught. But he saw all the cool experiments and the general chaos & was totally into it. (And btw, in my headcanon, Marty is the one who first refers to him as Doc & establishes it as his “name,” unlike the comic version where Doc tells Marty to call him that?? Def didn’t like that part.)

- When they started to consider each other best friends/what impact did they have on each other’s life: I’d say they considered the other a best friend pretty quickly. Doc was absolutely thrilled to discover that this kid thought he was awesome & was so interested in his work. After spending so much of his life without true connections or relationships, having Marty around really changed Doc’s life. He finally had someone (aside from Einstein) to talk to about all of his experiments and the science behind them.

The same goes for Marty considering Doc a best friend. Seeing as he was growing up in such a dysfunctional environment, with parents who probably weren’t super attentive or close to him, he loved being around Doc. Not only was he treated as an equal, he also had someone to listen to him, which he didn’t get at home. He found encouragement and felt respected around Doc. Plus, my general headcanon is that Marty really doesn’t have other friends & was always kind of an outsider.

Now onto some of my other headcanons....

- As I mentioned above, I don’t see Marty as a guy with many friends. He’s friendly towards a lot of people, but doesn’t have a specific group he belongs to. He really only interacts with his band mates while he’s at practice & it’s more of a business situation than a friendship. Marty gets to practice, runs the show (playing sick guitar riffs) & then just leaves. His band mates serve as a convenient cover story for when he wants to go somewhere with Jennifer, but that’s pretty much it. He has three friends, ok? And one of them is an animal.

- Upon finally settling into the improved ‘85 timeline, once all the time-traveling was over, things were understandably very jarring to Marty. One of the things he found hardest to adjust to was the sudden affection from his parents, namely the good morning hugs & kisses like we see Lorraine give him at the end of the first movie. Marty was previously used to spending the mornings in solitude since his father would already be at work & his mom would sleep in (often because she was still out of it from drinking the night before). The idea of family breakfasts & being greeted so warmly when he woke up, and when he got home from school, was super weird to him at first.

- Marty has ADHD. (this seems to be a very common headcanon, lol). Doc, being the kind of guy who’s interested in a wide variety of topics, came across some research & information on it at some point & instantly recognized the signs in his friend. When Marty came over one day, frustrated after a particularly rough day at school, he sat him down & talked to him about his suspicions. And since Doc was well aware of the lack of potential support (because this is the 80s after all, & SO many people with ADHD just didn’t have resources to get help), he took on the role of giving Marty advice and tips on how he could cope with it.

- Related to above point: Marty found that wearing layers helped keep him calm/feel grounded, hence why our boy rocks the t-shirt/button up/jean jacket/puffy vest look. And honestly, the suspenders might play a role in that too, since they put subtle pressure on part of the chest/shoulders/back. This also explains the leather jacket from part II! Aside from just thinking it looked awesome (and perfectly inconspicuous), Marty liked that it was a thick, weighted material.

-Doc is autistic. As he was diving into the world of research concerning ADHD & other various conditions, he came across a series of studies on Asperger’s syndrome & instantly connected the information with his own childhood and current life. Since he grew up feeling isolated from his peers & like nobody understood him, reading through the studies made him feel like he had found an answer. (A fact nobody asked for: the first study printed in English on Asperger’s syndrome was released in 1981. Yes, I checked to make sure this headcanon would be possible.)

-Doc set up a bed for Marty in the garage partially for the nights they were working late & his friend was too tired to head home, but also because he realized that a lot of the time, Marty simply didn’t want to be at home. Marty got into the habit of sleeping in his clothes so that at any given moment he could head over to Doc’s garage if he needed to. Doc made it clear to him that he was welcome anytime & doesn’t bat an eye when the boy wanders in at night & flops down into the bed.

-For Doc’s birthday, Marty went out & bought him the most colorful, “loudest” Hawaiian shirt he could find. It was sort of a joke, but Doc absolutely loved it.

-On Marty’s birthday, Doc asked him to come over under the guise of needing help with an experiment, but it was really a mini party with the lab decorated with streamers & balloons & cupcakes Doc had gone to pick up. Einstein wore a party hat.

- We all know Doc & Marty eat a lot of Burger King. When they eat it in Doc’s garage, Marty takes pieces of the fries and slips them under the table to Einstein. Doc does not appreciate Marty encouraging Einstein’s begging but the boy can’t resist sharing with the dog.

- Occasionally, when they’re taking a break from working or are just hanging out, Marty takes out his guitar & Doc takes out his saxophone & they jam. Sometimes they play actual songs & other times they create their own. Whenever they try to make up lyrics, it quickly devolves into complete nonsense, usually ending up with the two of them laughing so hard that they can’t even play anymore.

-Marty also sometimes puts on a Huey Lewis tape while the two of them are working. Doc initially wasn’t really into the music, but he eventually found himself singing along to the songs with Marty.

Okay, I need to stop myself because. Wow. If anyone actually reads this thing, I commend you on the effort. Kai, you had no idea what you were unleashing when you sent me that ask the other day.

#this is why i had to start this blog everyone #I was subjecting those around me to this IN REAL LIFE #now i'm subjecting all of you to it in virutal life #back to the future #bttf #marty mcfly #michael j fox #doc brown #christopher lloyd #nikki rambles:extreme edition

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bevvydraws · 5 years ago

Text

Why Stay? (Post-Ladybug Fic)

NOTE: This takes place after the episode “Ladybug”!!!

Marinette could not believe what she was hearing. Here Lila was, telling lies that were even more outlandish than the ones she had concocted to get Marinette expelled in the first place. And Principle Damocles, her mother, and her father were all falling for it! Really? How could you believe that she had a medical condition that caused her to act out the way she did? The real question though, was why she was backtracking? What reason could Lila possibly have for wanting Marinette to stay at the school?

All of this was getting to be too much, and Marinette really wasn’t sure how much longer she could handle the constant drama. She had enough on her plate as Ladybug, class representative, and everyone’s favorite go-to helper when they had a problem. The last thing she needed was to continue to constantly look over her shoulder. Besides, no one here seemed to believe her anyway, so how much could they possibly care?

So when Principle Damocles tells Marinette she would be free to come back to the school the next day, Marinette only hesitates briefly before saying, “I’m not so sure that I want to come back, sir.”

Everyone in the room looked shocked, and Damocles couldn’t help but sputter as he asks her why she felt that way. Marinette looks down at her feet, calming her nerves, before looking him back in the eyes and saying, “I’m not sure I’m comfortable being in the same environment as someone who’s supposed medical condition lead to me being expelled. No one allowed me to explain myself, and a large group of people were almost akumatized for it.” Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lila make a move to begin a dramatic display of apologizing for being a problem. However, Marinette wasn’t going to let her have the satisfaction. “I would never dream of asking Lila to ostracize herself from the others for her medical condition. So maybe the best solution is for me to simply go elsewhere.”

“Marinette, honey, are you sure?” Her mother places a hand on her shoulder, looking at her with searching eyes, but Marinette couldn’t help but feel a little betrayed. Even her own family had fallen for Lila’s lies. It just seemed so unbelievable. Her parents were the wisest people she knew, it was almost ridiculous how easy it was for Lila to convince them of her obviously fake illness.

“I think I’ll need a few days to decide, if that’s alright with everyone,” Marinette says, sounding ever so slightly defeated. There was a lot of thinking to be done after all, and she was scared that the right decision was going to be the one that was the hardest for her to make.

The little meeting came to an end and Marinette asks her parents if it was okay if she could get her things out of her locker, just in case she did decide to change schools. With her parent’s permission, she rushes to the bakery to grab a box to put her things in. Walking back, her mind was racing as thoughts on what to do flooded her mind. Marinette had even politely asked Tikki to refrain from giving her advice, knowing that this was a decision that she needed to make without being swayed by anyone. How was she ever going to make decisions for herself if she was constantly being pushed to do what everyone else wanted her to do?

Marinette was just starting to clean out her locker when the bell rang and students began flooding the locker room. Upon seeing Marinette, a lot of students came over to give her a big hug. There were various versions of, “welcome back” chorusing around her. Alya’s arm was thrown over her shoulder while she rambled on about how awesome it was that she was going to be back in class tomorrow, and how she just knew that everything was gonna work out.

“Actually,” Marinette whispers, eyes downcast, “I’m packing up my locker right now. I don’t know if I’m coming back.”

There was a round of gasps before people began jumping into questioning her. It got to be too much and Marinette couldn’t stop the tears that were forming in her eyes. This wasn’t right. None of it was right. It shouldn’t have come to this. She shouldn’t be the one who had to decide.

“Just stop it, everyone,” Marinette looked up while tears streamed down her face. “I love all of you so much. But I can’t be in the same school as Lila. Not while she’s still sick with whatever disease caused her to frame me for all of this in the first place.” Marinette was steadily putting things in her box as everyone looks on in disbelief. “And all of you love Lila so much, and I refuse to be the one who makes someone choose who has to stay or who has to go.”

Marinette began sobbing harder, her vision becoming so blurry that she couldn’t even bring herself to finish packing the last of her things up. So instead she just turned away from her open locker and clutched her box close to her chest. “I may be transferring schools,” she says, voice trembling and lip quivering, “So I just want all of you to know that I hope you enjoy the rest of your school year.”

And with that, she was fleeing from the locker room, everyone too dumbstruck by what had happened to even say anything for a while. The class just stood there, looking at each other as everything settled in. To everyone’s surprise, though, it was Adrien who was the first to move. He punched his locker, the loud noise reverberating in the locker room and causing everyone to snap out of their daze. “Dammit!” he shouts.

“What just happened…?” Alya asks, eyes fixated on her best friends now almost-empty locker that was still hanging open.

“Is Marinette really leaving?” Rose whispers softly to Juleka, who mumbles her own uncertainties back to her girlfriend.

“Dude, I thought Lila fixed everything?” Nino sat on one of the benches, unsure of what to do.

Suddenly everyone was trying to talk over each other, searching for answers even though they had no idea where they should begin. It was hard for anyone to wrap their minds around the fact that Marinette would be leaving them of her own free will.

“This is all my fault!” came a dramatic cry, “I should just leave instead.” It was Lila, who grew frustrated as everyone was focusing on Marinette. Everyone quickly rushed to comfort Lila, except for Adrien. No, Adrien was busy staring into the open locker that belonged--belongs-- to Marinette. The only things left in the locker were the pictures that she had taped up all over the locker walls and inside of the door, and a little planner at the bottom. He tentatively picks up the book, opening up the cover to see yet another picture taped to the inside. It was their class photo, and in the title spot of the book, she had written ‘Classmate’s Schedules’ in her looped handwriting.

Adrien began flipping through the pages and realized that Marinette had everyone’s schedules--including his own--written down. Along the margins were notes of potential dates that they could hold class events. It was amazing how detailed and accurate the schedules were, and Adrien wondered briefly why she had the planner. Then he realized it was just Marinette’s way of making sure everyone would be included in their activities. She had gone above and beyond as a class rep. His gaze began moving around to the pictures that were plastered in her locker.

Some were from class events, some were of random locations in Paris, and almost every single one of them had her friends in them. Marinette loved her classmates so much that she wanted the memories they shared to be the first thing she saw when she got to school. A surge of emotions rushed through Adrien all at once, and he wasn’t sure what to do. But he knew for a fact that he wasn’t going to let Lila keep running her mouth. He had warned her.

“So, Lila,” Adrien speaks up, not looking away from the inside of Marinette’s locker. “What exactly is the name of your disease? It sounds serious, and I’d like to discuss with my father looking into funding research for a cure.”

Lila is obviously caught off guard, not prepared for Adrien to begin working against her again so early, “Oh you don’t have to do that Adrien!” she placed a hand on her cheek, “I’m so flattered though. You’re always so nice to me.”

“But Lila,” Adrien looks at her, a smile on his face and honey dripping in his voice, with eyes that held so much malice that Lila felt his gaze might actually cut her, “this disease sounds really serious. If it causes you to act out and lie uncontrollably like this, who knows what else you’ve lied about? I just don’t want you to feel like a problem, that’s all.”

Murmurs begin to spark between the classmates, as they begin to realize the truth in Adrien’s words. If she claimed to have a disease that causes her to lie uncontrollably, had anything she said been truthful? Before Lila had the chance to weasel herself out of the situation, Adrien began addressing the rest of the class.

“Everyone… are we really going to risk losing Marinette?” he gestures to her locker, to the pictures and her planner, “Our everyday Ladybug, who has done so much for all of us with ever asking for anything in return?”

“Do you really think she’s going to leave us?” Nathaniel speaks up, eyes downcast.

“There’s a high probability that she will,” Max pushes his glasses up, “Due to the unfortunate way we have all treated her, I don’t think any of us could blame her for wanting to leave.”

“There is no way Mari would just leave us like that!!” Alya spoke up, tapping hurriedly on her phone before placing it to her ear, “I’m going to talk some sense into her.”

To no one’s surprise, Marinette didn’t answer. So Alya made as if she were going to head to Marinette’s place, but Adrien and Nino stop her. “Al, the last thing she needs right now is you trying to persuade her to come back,” Nino says softly to her.

“She’s my best friend Nino! She can’t just leave!”

“None of us have been very good friends to her,” Adrien frowns, “Me especially.”

Everyone turns to him, surprised he would say that. The whole school basically knew that Marinette was head over heels for Adrien, so there was no way Marinette could have any sort of grudge against him. Adrien bites his lip, looking back at the pictures in her locker. His gaze fell on one photo in particular: a picture of him and Marinette dancing at Chloe’s party. Apparently, Alya had snapped a photo while they were dancing. Marinette had always been so kind to him and brought him a sense of comfort he really couldn’t find with many other people. She needed him to speak up for her right now, to do something he should have done a long time ago.

“Me and Marinette both knew about Lila being a liar,” Adrien says, “She’s lied countless times. And it’s not because of a disease, it’s because she is an awful person.”

Lila gasps, fake tears already in her eyes, “Adrien how could you say that after that photoshoot we had together? I thought… I thought we had something special…”

“Save it, Lila,” Adrien snaps, “The only thing I have for you is contempt. Let’s not forget that you broke into my home, and continue to harass me even though it’s obvious that I’m uncomfortable. You just don’t like taking no for an answer!”

Alya steps between Adrien and Lila, “Adrien what are you talking about? You sound about as crazy as Marinette right now.”

“And THIS is exactly why she doesn’t want to come back!” Adrien shouts, “No one believes her! And it’s all my fault! I told her to stay quiet about Lila being a compulsive liar. Because I thought the two of us knowing would be enough, and that it was better to just leave it be than let Lila get akumatized again!”

“Lila did say she had a disease that causes her to lie…” Alya tries to defend, “So she can’t help it if--”

“Alya a disease like that doesn’t exist! And if it does, do you really think she looks guilty for lying all the time?”

The two begin bickering back and forth, and in the confusion, Lila hastily makes an escape. She would have to take time and regroup before coming back to class. Or, if it was entirely a lost cause, figure out another plan of action.

“Dudes!” Nino finally interrupted, “We need to focus on Marinette right now. Besides, Lila’s already bailed.”

“Figures,” Adrien grumbles. Then he addresses the rest of his classmates, “Marinette has done so much for all of us. She’s never let us down. And what is the thanks we give her? We turned our backs on her and didn’t believe her when she said she was being framed. She would have never left any of us alone like that.”

“What can we do to make her come back?” Rose asks with tears in her eyes.

“We’ll have to brainstorm some ideas to show her just how much she means to us.”

“Well, when I was going to leave, all of you decided to celebrate,” Chloe speaks up while looking at her nails, “It was Dupain-Cheng who decided to throw a party for Queen Bee.”

“That’s it!” Kim shouts, “We can throw Marinette a party!”

“Would she even come, though?” Alix asks, “I don’t think we could get her to come back to the school.”

“Then we won’t have it at the school?” Sabrina hesitantly suggests, “We could have it somewhere else. Like maybe the park?”

“Ew no,” Chloe scoffs, “We’ll have it at Daddy’s hotel.”

“That’s so sweet of you, Chloe,” Rose cheers happily.

“Yeah well, I totally owe her for that party,” Chloe scoffs, “The last thing I want is to stay in debt with her. After this, we’ll be even.” She indignantly looks to the side, but she couldn’t stop the smile that crossed her face.

“We’ll need to plan everything soon. I doubt we have much time,” Adrien grins, “Do you think we can do it?” He holds his hand out. One by one his classmates put their hands on top of his, and they were all in agreement.

They were going to bring back their everyday Ladybug.

#bevvy writes #my writing #ladybug #post ladybug #fix it fic #miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug fanfic #fanfic #ml fanfic #marinette dupain cheng #lila rossi #adrien agreste

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gascon-en-exil · 5 years ago

Note

I'm genuinely curious about your "Black Eagles most to least favourite" list.

Here you are.

#1: Hubert

Could there be any other? I remember back when there was a promo introducing the house retainers (well, Lorenz for the Deer) and everyone was saying that Hubert looked so obviously evil that there had to be some deeper explanation, that someone who took design cues from a two-dimensional villain like Fates’s Iago couldn’t possibly be Edelgard’s retainer. Then the game came out, and we all realized that Hubert was exactly as advertised and then some: a cold and calculating murderer and war criminal with his fingerprints all over almost every terrible thing that happens over the course of the story, as comfortable with chloroform and a razor as dark magic and down to perform unspeakable experiments on innocent civilians to turn them into war machines and then backstab his co-conspirators because he will suffer no rivals for his title of the Most Evil Man in Fòdlan. And yep, he looks like Dracula and Severus Snape had a one-night stand and their mpreg love child went to an anime convention...but when Ferdinand looks at Hubert he sees Mr. Darcy and the Phantom of the Opera and Edward Cullen/Christian Grey, and soon enough that snake in Hubert’s breeches will be singing quite the aria indeed. You do you, Ferdinand.

Ok, I’ve already rambled at length on Hubert’s bisexuality and the interesting things it reveals about both him and his two primary love interests, but I do also have to admire the sheer audacity both of Hubert as an incel/Nice Guy-flavored romantic false lead for Edelgard who never had a serious chance because of the self-insert fantasy and of the decision to follow that up with a trope-laden queer romance that perfectly counterbalances Hubert’s attraction to Edelgard and puts Ferdinand firmly in the place he was destined to occupy by choosing to side with the Empire. It’s nearly as outrageous as just how casually evil Hubert gets to be, as well as the immense potential for dark humor that lies with that. You have to bend over backwards to say that Hubert isn’t unapologetically, irredeemably evil, and if you try there will be significantly more fans just waiting to tell you that you’re wrong - myself included. He’s the Manfroy to Edelgard’s Arvis but so much than that, and I look forward to the point in the CF postgame where he effectively takes over the Empire in true evil chancellor fashion and unleashes the full extent of his horrors upon Fòdlan. He somehow got even better in the DLC too despite being absent from CS and getting no new supports, because the Abyssians in CF just can’t stop talking about his nefarious antics down there. I just can’t get enough of how good this guy is at being bad, and I love that FE gave us exactly what was advertised here.

#2: Ferdinand

Now here’s a case of the opposite, where what’s on the packaging didn’t prepare me for what was to come. If I remarked on Ferdinand at all during pre-release it was only to think that he might be part of a Christmas knight duo with Sylvain since the game looked like it wouldn’t have one of those. Early on there wasn’t much else to be said about Ferdinand; he was like Claude in that his popularity ran off a meme (except just the one rather than several), and in appearance and personality he was basically Lorenz with less ridiculous hair. But then came his supports, and his post-timeskip look, and suddenly Ferdinand blossomed into the subtext-laden fem with very bizarre taste in men - see above - that he could have only dreamed of being if he’d stuck to such well-trod ground as the Christmas knight archetype. We learn of his love for opera, his complicated relationship with his father, his worship of the hot mess diva Manuela and how he learned swordplay specifically to imitate her roles on the stage, and - yes - how some backhanded compliments and expensive gifts of tea turn him into a blushing Regency heroine. It all casts his unusually rote romances with women in a performative light (as opposed to Lorenz who is similarly performative but seems genuinely interested in the marriage market), to say nothing of his one-sided rivalry with Edelgard that brushes against jealousy over Hubert’s devotion to her more often than against romantic attraction to her, and that toys around with gendered behavior in a manner complementary to Edelgard’s own bucking of the gender status quo.

And while not to the same extent as Felix, I do appreciate that Ferdinand has two distinct arcs depending on the route - and unlike some who feel that one or the other detracts from his character as a whole I personally find that they complement each other well. In SS and if recruited to AM and VW he makes the hard choice to oppose his homeland, spending the timeskip waging a solitary battle against the Empire with his private militia and then joining back up with Byleth’s army at Garreg Mach because he knows Edelgard is in the wrong even as it pains him to depose the Adrestian emperor and leave his own status uncertain...not to mention fight Hubert, which merits a curious boss conversation as well as some extra lines in SS (plus the infamous Huge Hole™ remark that I will never stop referencing because it is hilarious) that, while not elevating Ferdibert anywhere near the level of Dimidue in terms of cross-route canon endorsement, nonetheless are suggestive of something deeper between them that exists even if they find themselves on opposite sides of a war. In CF by contrast Ferdinand gives into his craving for the title and holdings that Edelgard has just stripped from his father and embraces nationalism and his long-held ideal of what the office of the prime minister should to do as a means of justifying the Empire’s conquests. Of course in the process he also succumbs to Hubert’s, er, charms(?) and becomes the charismatic bureaucrat who is presumably saddled with the task of putting a positive spin on the Empire’s dystopian atrocities while Edelgard and Hubert do all the actual work...and Hubert does all the actual actual work, which includes a lot of murder and kidnapping and all manner of other things that he doesn’t share with his pretty lover and about which Ferdinand quickly learns not to ask. Two Jewels of the Empire, indeed.

#3-4: Edelgard and Dorothea

I go back and forth on these so I’m not going to bother putting them in a definitive order, particularly because I like them for very different reasons that are difficult to compare. For Edelgard, it would be most accurate to say that I enjoy her potential much more than her execution; she gets some meaty material to work with as a lord and as the driving antagonist of the whole game outside of CF, and while I still prefer Micaiah for female lords there’s something darkly satisfying about her need for control and domination and her utter refusal to compromise or remain stagnant...except where Byleth is concerned, and Edeleth drags her down so badly that it would be painful if I cared more about that type of strong female character. Had the game axed the self-insert obsession (even if that meant axing her bisexuality along with it) and focused on her experiences during the Insurrection as the source of her worldview and motivations I’d be inclined to like the final product far more, because that’s a hell of a lot more in line with what she actually does and conveniently also maps to the life of a real world ruler with whom I’m relatively familiar and whom history regards in appropriately ambivalent terms.

Dorothea on the other hand is someone I can relate to on a more personal level, mostly as a sex worker. She’s similar to Primrose from Octopath Traveler, both of them prostitutes and playing coy with the implications of the RPG dancer class archetype, although Primrose hits a few more of my buttons for being former nobility and being motivated by revenge. Then again, I fully understand Dorothea’s anxieties about growing old without a man to take care of her, even if she loses me (and Yuri picks up from where she leaves off) when she dips into lesbianism as an alternative option. She’s got her ups and downs for me - I love that she brings up incest kink with Caspar as opposed to this series’s usual outright incest, while I love less her strange Ferdinand supports that are suspended oddly between friendship and romance and...something else undefinable - and I don’t have much to say on her life as an opera diva except that it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest that she’s been turning tricks on the side and even got a sugar daddy to pay her way into the academy. Theatre and sex work have always gone hand-in-hand like that.

#5-7: Linhardt, Caspar, and Petra

This is why I couldn’t make up a list like this for the Lions or Deer, because most of their students would be in big clumps like this. I have no strong opinions on any of these characters; they each have their moments, but not enough to elevate them to where I actively like them or drop them down into real dislike. I suppose you could say I’m disappointed by how Caspar and Linhardt are visual allusions to Ike/Soren who do absolutely nothing else with that similarity except eloping in their paired ending...which is preceded by virtually nothing in the way of real chemistry. If I enjoy them for anything in particular it’s Linhardt’s wit and Caspar’s occasional bouts of emotional vulnerability, like his mini-arc in AM where he has to deal with his feelings surrounding Randolph’s death and then later gets an apology from Dimitri for it.

Petra is awkward all around as the game dances around her delicate political situation, and I also happen to agree with the VA who (if I recall) thought the character should have some sort of accent but wasn’t allowed to do one. (If anyone is wondering, based on her last name and Brigid being an island nation I headcanon it as a Celtic-derived culture, but as with my personal reading of Dedue and Duscur I know that doesn’t play well to the fandom at large). All in all Petra feels like a more self-aware rendition of the exotic swordswoman archetype begun by Ayra in Jugdral, but there’s clearly still some work to be done on that front.

#8: Bernadetta

Ugh. With apologies to @capriciouscorvid for explaining how even unintentional disability representation can be taken as a positive, I just don’t see how Bernadetta’s character could possibly be considered a good thing when she’s so grating in almost all of her supports and most of her story and exploration presence outside of CF. All the screaming and high-pitched pronouncements of impending death get very old very quickly, and the part where she’s meant to be romantically appealing in her neediness and isolation is as lost on me as it would have been had it stemmed instead from a massive rack. Her supposedly sympathetic backstory doesn’t help much either, as it leaves me mostly with the thought that her father is an idiot because his methods obviously did not make her suitable to be a good wife. I also don’t care for how she’s one of several characters used to soften Jeritza (and that the way she does so is I think rather insulting to people with social anxiety, to liken it to a compulsion to commit murder), or even worse that people point to her Hubert support to try and say that he’s not such a bad guy and they’d be total besties just like Ferdinand and Dorothea (another pairing that doesn’t exactly scream BFFs). I mean, really....

#Fire Emblem #FE16 #Fire Emblem Three Houses #Black Eagles

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canyouhearthelight · 5 years ago

Text

The Miys, Ch. 61

Okay, shorter chapter this week due to where the break fell. Please remember that this arc involves an unknown illness, so there is mention of hospitals, medical procedures, and a minor mention of blood.

Antoine eventually relented and let me flick on my datapad to keep up with the events unfolding around me, but only with a strict order not to so much as sit up straight until we knew for sure what was going on. Nonetheless, I felt helpless as I lay in a medical berth listening and watching everything that was happening around me. Simon was at least kind and cruel enough to leave a channel open to me while he assisted the Council in their decision process regarding the potential epidemic we were facing.

"We need to minimize panic," Xiomara argued.

"By isolating people in their quarters?" The snort that accompanied the question belonged to Alistair, on loan to Simon for the duration.

"It's standard protocol for isolating a contagion."

"According to what little information we have, there is no isolating this. Everyone is already infected, to various degrees," Simon pointed out.

"The delusional rambling of a sick woman? That is really what we are going off of?" Huynh's voice barked incredulously. I could hear my sister growl from across the bay where she stood reviewing my latest test results with Antoine.

Simon, however, did not back down. "Sophia Reid is not the only person to report this information. We have corroborating information from fifty others so far, some dating from as much as a week ago."

Eino's curiosity broke in. "Why are we just now hearing about this?"

"The information comes from therapeutic patient files. Nightmares have been widespread recently, and nearly all of the crew who were already assigned to companions have allowed us access to information regarding any discussions they have had regarding the content of those dreams. They were not informed why we requested it, only that we were looking for any similarities." Grey's flat, factual tone brooked no argument.

"We still have no hard evidence of the underlying cause of this," Xiomara stated. "I have absolute faith in the report you speak of, but until we are looking at the source of this, there is a chance not everyone is infected, and I think it is best we keep it that way -"

"Sophia," Tyche's voice broke in. When I glanced up, she looked more exhausted than I had seen her in months. "Turn it off for now. It sounds like Simon and Grey can handle things."

"We don't have enough space," I murmured to myself as I flicked away my datapad. When Tyche tilted her head empathically and worked an eyebrow, I realized I said it aloud. "Medical berths," I clarified. "We don't have enough. That, more than anything, will cause panic - being afraid of not getting treatment. That's why she wants people isolated to their quarters."

Medical scans of the Terrans on the Ark were showing hundreds of cases of people with similar symptoms to mine. Worst cases were immediately transported to the nearest healing bay. Our absolute worst case was found already in a life support tank - Nixe had nearly drowned when she passed out in the water with her diving weights on. Hyper-oxygenated suspension liquid and constant whole-blood transfusions were waging war to keep her alive, but it seemed a holding pattern was all that had been managed.

Miys was treating as many people as possible in their quarters, or in the quarters of others they were familiar with who were in similar shape. Derek, Sam, and Zach were all three isolated together, while I tried to avoid thinking about the three of them suffering under an unknown illness. They were halfway across the Ark, and I couldn't help them - it tore at my heart. I desperately wanted my family together through this.

"Any luck?" I asked quietly, trying to distract myself.

Antoine sighed heavily. "Very little," he admitted, running a hand through his hair, mussing it even further. His normally ramrod posture slumped under the invisible weight of the task he had undertaken.

Isolating an unknown microscopic organism within a human body turned out to be more difficult for Noah than we expected. The colonies of bacteria that lived in and on a single person prevented simple scans from isolating on just one particular outlier. It had muttered several times about how annoying human anatomy was, as it identified a particular bacteria, only to have Antoine or someone from the research labs explain it was supposed to be there.

Not long after I received a communication from Alistair that the isolation measures were agreed upon, both he and Grey come into the medical bay, relieving the most recent scientist Miys was terrorizing. Once brought up to date by Antoine - who immediately flopped into a berth with a heretofore unseen lack of dignity - Grey took a glance at Noah's most recent finding.

They sighed in resignation. "That is intestinal flora and is necessary to proper consumption of food."

"Tell me about it," Tyche grumbled next to me.

Noah's current avatar whirled in her with surprising grace. "Tyche. How many of these digestion bacteria were you missing when you came on board?" Humorously, it used it's [large hand] to mimic squinting eyelids.

It never had stopped envying the mobility of our facial muscles.

She shrugged, wincing slightly at the pain that had developed in her shoulder as her own symptoms started to show. "I dunno. Didn't you count when you were replacing them?" After a lifetime of trouble eating - even as a kid she had been extraordinarily 'picky', and we only realized in our late twenties that may have been the start of it - she caved in and let Miys fix the issue a few months after I woke up here.

The being in question flared and started rippling it's vomu. "We did not. We - may - have cloned functional organs, along with their bacteria, and replaced yours."

"May have?"

"We did?"

She rubbed her face, groaning when she triggered a nosebleed. "Great. Anyway, how did cloning my organs and bacteria fix the problem? They didn't work right to begin with."

"We never claimed we cloned your organs."

Tyche and I traded looks of concern. "Noah," I ventured slowly. "You can't just swap people's organs willy-nilly. They have to be compatible..." A horrifying thought occured to me. "You've had to clone and replace a lot of my body... Please tell me you cloned and replaced all of it from me? That could be causing this whole -"

"Peace, Wisdom. All of your cloned organs came from your own genetic material. We are aware of the possibility of rejection... Tyche, your new digestive tract was cloned from the closest possible match." It gestured at me. "Before she arrived, you repeatedly complained that your sister had what you called 'the good stomach'."

I felt slightly queasy knowing that a copy of my guts was churning along in my sister. "How certain were you that there would be no rejection issues?" I squeaked gracefully.

"We used her own organs as scaffolding. There is no chance of rejection, I assure you."

Tyche stared at her midsection. "I never had an organ transplant... I expected it to hurt more," she ruminated quietly. "So, I can seriously eat whatever I want?" She asked, louder this time.

"Within limits."

"Pretty big limits," I pointed out. I had only had heartburn once in my entire life, and it was due to an allergy to tequila, of all things.

"Unfortunately," Miys admitted. It had developed a distinct preference for requesting what I was eating before entering a room with me. "Including that plant that eats you back."

"Pineapple," the four humans in the room corrected simultaneously, sharing a smile.

"We have to fix this epidemic," Tyche announced with renewed fervor. "I just got told I can eat anything I want, up to and including foods that make most humans sick, and I have a list, people."

At least someone was getting some good news.

<< Prev Masterlist Next >>

#the miys #humans are weird #humans are space orcs #aliens #science fiction #original scifi #original fiction #apocalypse

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yellow-pigeons · 4 years ago

Text

The troupe gains a member - A WillNemi Fic

London looked marvelous today.

If she wasn’t forced to be on her way to a certain place, hours wouldn’t be enough to fully admire the beauty of the slowly developing city, currently basking in the first, warm rays of dawn. Sunlight dusts over the grey and brown buildings like snow, gradually showing their outlines, and shines from the stained windows in the most abandoned areas.

Rain is no more, at least for the time being, unlike in her realm, which is also far more pleasant than having to walk around everywhere with her heaviest coat and a scarf. How annoying, even after all these years she cannot help but nearly freeze when rain or storms occur.

Sighing upon that wandering thought, the blue Shinigami bolts towards the already set up circus square, jumping down from a roof to seem a little less suspicious to the gloomy, still drowsy English.

Drat, this skirt was far from comfortable to be running in, if only times allowed for her to be wearing her usual one in public…

“Mornin’ to ya madam! How may I be of service?”

A loud, resonant voice reaches her ears, as an orange haired male towers over her, smiling in a friendly, harmless manner. Just now, she realizes she has been standing there for quite a while, not noticing him observing her since she came as well.

“Oh, pardon my mindless staring good sir, but... May I ask you something?”

Her chartreuse eyes pierce right through him, as the man widely known as Joker walks with her for a small while. Humans are indeed very interesting, they are careful around strangers, however are fooled by the commonly known façade of good looks and sweet words. Their ways of speaking also varies with each ones’ personality, but that is pretty obvious.

“Is there a problem, luv? Whatcha doin’ around here, with such heavy baggage?”

The fellow asks, to which she purposely looks away with a distressed frown, rubbing her arm a little. Clad in a teal blue shirt and dark grey skirt up to her ankles, she looks no different from some regular woman in the current era, with the exception of her unusually colored irises.

“I have found myself in a bloody bad space for years now, and have heard that you are looking for new circus members. Would it be much of a drag if I-”

“But of course! We been lackin’ ladies in the crew recently, so yer a perfect fill up for our troupe! Come, come, I shall introduce ye to the others!”

He is affable, unsuspecting just as she expected him to be. This is good, she thinks to herself, holding her head down as she walks by the man’s side all the way towards one of the big, greenish-brown tents.

“What’s yer name lass? Ye can choose one that will be yer stage name, and we shall call ye this way.”

“I’m not keen on being called by my real name, so just please call me ‘Nemi’”

Joker grins widely, patting her back in an assuring gesture.

“Of course! Yer secrets stay private in this place! Quick question before ye accommodate yerself here though.”

His eyes turn over to her as they suddenly cease the slow marching, Haruda stopping and immediately looking up at him. She sees a glint of mischief in his gaze, which makes her tilt her head to the side questioningly, morning breeze threading through her hair.

“What are ye good at? Certainly ye have a special talent that would be beneficial for tha circus.”

“Oh my, I simply don’t know where to start, mister…”

“Joker, the name’s Joker.”

----------------------------------

“Oi! Gather all around! We have a new acrobat in tha troupe!”

At the sound of Joker’s call, the circus members began walking into the white and blue tent, usually in small groups to see what was the show all about. Noemi was swinging downwards from a trapeze on one leg, curiously eyeing the poor, unfortunate souls that happened to end up here. What a shame she couldn’t bring herself to somehow feel bad for them, the mystery behind the disappearances of children were far more important though.

Swinging from one trapeze to another, she easily made a few flips in the air, earning herself a satisfying applause. Landing beside the purple eyed man with the last leap, she bowed politely to the cheering audience, them soon being shushed by Joker.

“Everyone meet Nemi! She will be one of our newest, and probably most skilled freshman acrobats. Peter, Wendy, better step up yer game if ye want to remain the main attraction.”

The male laughed, as the bluenette eyed everyone with a calm smile. Where was he, for Rhea’s sake? She wasn’t supposed to be here earlier. What she did notice was the Queen’s Guard Dog, and his…

“Demon...”

She whispered to herself, not dropping her stoic mask, feeling an elbow in the arm from Joker.

“What would ye like to say to yer new mates? No need to be shy!”

Haruda looked around, and after a while of thought, she finally spoke up, as she should’ve done before, instead of the sketchy whisper.

“I will be most happy to be working with you all! It’s a pleasure to be here.”

She smiled widely, earning an applause once again, as well as some silent comments.

Of course, there was one thing about her appearance that she could never fully hide, which was more than troublesome with her kind of outfit. The scars on her neck and chest were an issue, but people were kind enough not to ask too many questions. She made up a story of how her husband spilled boiling hot coffee on her, and she had no idea how to care for open wounds.

Ah, another wonderful thing about the people from this era. Immense stupidity and misinformation. Any story was good enough to be shoved in their faces with enough drama to that and they were on their knees.

Ha ha, what a silly world we live in.

“Ye sure space out a lot, lass. I wanted ye to meet some other skilled new members of our troupe, since they were much of bloody ignoramuses to come n’ greet ya! Black! Smile! Show yer new colleague around! And where’s Suit?!”

The male rambled, as the two approached her eventually. Not the first time she saw a demon in her life, however this one seemed to be oddly put for a starving vermin. She was told he had some sort of contract with that spoiled child. How utterly atrocious for him to prey on brats.

However, this was not the time to be revealing her true identity, so keeping a good face to a bad game was her task now. And obviously fulfilling her mission, which was making sure that Spears wasn’t going to screw up his task. This was quite a few souls after all, and with a starving demon lurking around to that he could be in potential danger.

Smiling softly as they finally closed the distance between one another with around six feet, the bluenette scanned them both properly, before the blue eyed child’s demon spoke up, his crimson orbs focusing on her with curiosity.

“Hello dear, you must be the Nemi everyone is talking about now. Welcome to the troupe. I am Black, and this little fellow here is Smile.”

“It’s a pleasure, Black, Smile. I am a tad lost with all the ruckus around here, would you be so kind and show me my place to rest?”

Smoothly, she escaped the kid’s suspicious glare, as the demon nodded and took her luggage. Huh, that was unusual, however if he were to check it, there was nothing really special inside, apart from spare clothing items, her favorite book and some daily care routine things, like a toothbrush or comb.

“Joker assigned you the tenth tent, which means you’ll be there alone. Such a shame I couldn’t be your company; you look dreadfully gloomy to me.”

“I am just fine with that, dear Black. Surely you have wonderful mates in your own one, I believe.”

She jabs back at the demon with a sly smirk, as he nods and sets down her trunk beside a bunk bed.

The tents’ inside is dim when the lamps are out, morning sunlight sneaking inside and somewhat making it more appealing to the eye. It’s a simple setting, with the beds set in the right corner and a few stacked up wooden boxes serving as a nightstand.

Before she notices, they swiftly leave, allowing her to accommodate herself into the new sleeping spot. Taking out an old-fashioned alarm clock, she places it on top of the boxes, setting it for five am with a few cracks of the cogs inside it. Despite the rather rigid, barbarian surroundings, she feels at ease, considering this yet another mission to complete.

This one just requires a little bit more effort and spying, which for her sounded more than just interesting. That was why she agreed after all. Besides, she was in charge of monitoring the Retrieval Division manager, so there wasn’t much of a choice either. Understaffment was truly a thorn in the side these days.

So, Suit. This was his stage name, eh? The blasted moron couldn’t come up with anything better, how typical.

“Tch. Always in a need to be controlled even though he was supposed to be fine on his own. What a waste of a perfectly fine reaper.”

She grumbles to herself, walking around in her ‘human’ attire, slowly catching sight of how the tents were placed, and where everything was. With her skirt swapped for trousers, she stumbles upon a training tent, being invited to stretch and work out a little before next week’s show.

Everything goes just fine before the last evening falls, the dress rehearsal after sunset being one of the last moments where she could focus and somehow catch sight of him. Up until then she was doing quite alright, slipping out of the suspicion range of the demon and the kid, whilst William apparently struggled with remembering what he was over a hundred years ago.

She hides from his sight, not allowing him to discover that he’s being watched.

Days fly as she trains and helps around the circus, each day being so strangely similar to what was once of her, somewhere in her motherland. Hard, physical work, but also some new friends, that sadly were to die in the nearest months. Despite that, she enjoys her stay, while being merely a week in.

Just now, she is in the middle of a pirouette in mid-air, when she hears a familiar voice. With a purposeful fail in her trick, she falls onto the white net, staying in it to avoid an unavoidable encounter with one person she was not supposed to encounter during her stay. Hoping for him to leave as soon as possible, she is quickly disappointed as silence falls in the huge tent.

“Just what are You doing here, Noemi Haruda. Are you not supposed to be sitting behind your desk, instead of fooling around here like some sort of monkey? You are one reaper I would never expect to be doing this type of work.”

Darn it.

She climbs out of the net, piercing the raven haired man with a dagger throwing gaze, shaking her head. This is no good. If the kid and the butler find out about her true identity her whole plan will go to absolute bollocks!

As an ultimate method of defending herself, the blue haired female blurts out a laugh, holding her abdomen before flopping back into the net, mentally kicking herself for choosing the biggest tent for practice.

“Oh four-eyes, your jokes are always spot on, are they not? I don’t believe we have been properly introduced to one another yet. I know no such person as Noemi Haruda. I am Nemi.”

The male frowns deeply, turning around and walks away from the tent.

What the devil is she doing here?

Did she send herself here to monitor his actions? Probably yes, judging from the undercover she is in. Unsurprisingly, the humans consider her to be one of them, which makes up for his poor attempts to blend in.

Hmm, did the demon fall for her trick as well?

Apparently yes, since he’s probably never seen her before. Can’t demons smell Shinigami? That wasn’t for him to wonder about, though.

As soon as the training is considered to be over, the blue haired woman follows after William to the back of the circus, grabbing his wrist. He pulls it away immediately, turning around to face her. It’s obvious her presence makes him far away from pleased, with his arms tightly pressed to his sides and jaw nearly snapping off from the strength he put in gritting his teeth.

Clad in his white trousers and green vest, he nearly spits venom when audibly snorting at her short, black and white striped dress and knee high boots.

Honestly.

“You look like a prostitute.”

“You look like a homo.”

“What makes you think I am not one.”

“I don’t know, maybe because we’ve slept together more than you’d like to admit?”

“Don’t start with that again. Better tell me what in the seven circles of Hell are you doing here.”

She turns her head away from him, grimacing ever so slightly at his immediate coldness. But what could she expect from a dense son of a dog like him. Ugh, is this barf bubbling at the back of her throat just now? Ah no, it’s only hatred. Burning, bitter disgust towards the reaper she not so long ago claimed to be her only reason to live.

How stupid can a woman get for the wrong man?

“It is none of your concern why am I here. We were not supposed to meet during your mission here, yet I have made a mistake with choosing the wrong tent, it seems.”

“How long have you been here?”

He drew through clenched teeth, as the blue haired reaper kicks at the ground a bit, unwilling to reveal more to him than he had already discovered. She is in trouble already for interfering with her mission, however this was an agreed idea among all the members of the headquarters, so in reality he doesn’t have much to say about her here, to be frank.

“It’s been a week since I joined. I have been monitoring your progress because of me and other chairmen deciding it would be a good thing to do. And since I am your superior, I was chosen to be the one having to work undercover as well.”

“This is plain idiocy. I am a grown man, why should I need someone to watch after me, let alone control my actions.”

“Maybe because Sutcliff went on a murder rampage and you saw nothing, you bloody moron!”

The woman snaps, summoning her scythe and directing a blow at him, Spears dodging before the blade hits his head. Growling, he grabs a hold of her death scythe, pulling her closer with a stronger, unexpected tug.

“Keep it down, it’s enough that they know I am a reaper. You don’t want to have a demon on your arse as well.”

“Ha! Since when do you care what will happen to me?”

He looks away, letting go of the double bladed pole, making the woman flop onto the ground with a growl. Pushing up his glasses, Spears scoffs, shaking his head at her repetitive accusations. How long is she going to hold a grudge? Of course, he is still going for a long while, but the fiery Italian seems to still have an itch for simply beating an apology out of him.

“I don’t. However, your injury will be cut out of my pay. I wish to avoid that, as well as overtime.”

“You will get overtime whether you want it or not. I decide about it. Better have a good contact with me, instead of throwing me around like a rag doll.”

Spears’ head cocks to the side in anger, as he approaches her in a rather quick, heavy manner. Despite her usual fearlessness towards his frustration, she flinches in a long-forgotten habit, mentally kicking herself for doing so. He smirks in return, grabbing her by the neck and rising upwards, until she grips his hand and huffs.

“Watch your tongue, missy. I have no concern in causing you harm, but I will if the occasion strikes.”

“I despise you.”

“So do I. Now get out of my sight before it gets bloody.”

With that, she is set down fiercely, the ravenet staring for a while before turning on his heel and making his way towards the tents. Something in her bubbles up, making a few tears prick at her eyes, before she wipes them away, leaping at him with an inhuman strength, knocking the other reaper on the ground with a thud.

As her hands wrap around the man’s throat, she holds him down with her whole body mass, eyes lighting up in a sudden outburst of power. She thanks Rhea that he isn’t that angry yet, but this surely puts her in advantage when it comes to a ‘fight’ with him. It is certainly not a time to be settling matters with Spears, but such disrespectful addressing will not be tolerated.

The evening is chilly, wind sometimes blowing and successfully muting the quieter words that escape from people’s mouths. Stars shine bright above them, slightly covered by the tall oaks and birches, that surround the circus. It almost feels like they are alone, yet the feeling is illusory, since one wrong move and…

“Listen here, agent 1398. I am your superior, and this type of ridicule is repugnant. Consider this to be your final warning, otherwise the rest of the headquarters will get to know about the shit you’ve been doing on the terrain of Dispatch. I’m not your colleague, nor underling.”

Words leave her in a low, venomous hiss, as she delivers a harsh slap across William’s face, making him finally cease his writhing. With his fluorescent gaze focused on her only, he scrunches up his nose, placing his hands on her wrists.

“That will be enough, Noemi. Fighting will cause a scene to occur. Let’s leave it to the day when the mission shall be completed. Pardon my behavior, however I am unwilling to spend another long night in my office because of your approach to my person.”

She sighs helplessly, standing up slowly. Lending him a hand, Noemi dusts her stockings off, locking eyes with him one last time.

“Maybe you will understand my motives one day, but what I know for sure is that you do not despise me. I see it in you, no matter how much you deny it. Do what you want with that. I will not be pushing myself somewhere where I am not wanted.”

And with that, she ports away, leaving Spears in the dreadful silence, sometimes interrupted by circus music and crickets.

Damn it.

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May contain strong language, read on your own responsibility <3 This is part of Noemi's canon story!

I will start posting just the links o any fanfics as soon as I get my Ao3 account activated, so sorry for the inconvenience TwT

#kuroshitsujioc #kuroshitsuji #william t spears #sebastian michaelis #ciel phantomhive #joker #fanfiction #their love hate relationship makes me lmao

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elowyn-ffxiv · 4 years ago

Text

this house is not a home.

“Will you ever stop being a child?”

It has been rare, during this sennight spent with my parents, to be addressed or spoken to. Of course, this is nothing unusual. I grew up in silence, more often than not, unless I made the sound myself, or if there was a particularly persistent bird filtering in through open windows.

Now, though, it’s my mother who speaks, glaring daggers at me across the carpeted floor of the parlor. Admittedly, I don’t at first understand why she’s asking me such a question. To fill in the quiet places where it has now become something odd and uncomfortable, I’ve taken to doing what I did as a little girl; I make my own noise, or at least do something to occupy my own mind. This time, I’ve focused on making socks for Gabriel.

He likes practical gifts. At least I can make him something that’s both practical and from the heart, but...

I frown, looking down at the pile of them laying on my lap, and brush my fingertips over the little hedgehog that I’ve embroidered upon them - at what it is my mother is so vexed by.

“It’s for a gift,” I murmur, unhappy with how meek and small my voice sounds. “It’s... I thought it added a nice, personal touch.”

“Are you not making them for a grown man?” she snaps at me. “What makes you think he’d appreciate the little woodland animals you’re wasting your time adorning his gift with? Can you not do something more useful? I need herbs crushed for medicines, or you could be practicing your healing. What need do you have for knitting garments? Do your father and I not provide you with gil to pay for your needs and expenses?”

Each word hits me like a weighted stone - blow after blow after blow. Perhaps the digs and nagging are insignificant, and I’m simply oversensitive.

“I am a grown woman,” I start, keeping my eyes low, “and I can choose what it is I want to do to entertain myself--”

“You are only grown,” my mother interjects, too coldly, “when you no longer feel the need to point it out to others, Elowyn. You are a foolish, useless sort of girl, aren’t you, who only knows about silly, useless things? I would have hoped your time... ‘adventuring...’ might have taught you something.”

“I have learned plenty!” My voice cracks, but I push on. “Mother, please, this seems such a terrible overreaction to me-- to me simply wishing to put a personal touch on a gift, I don’t understand--”

“No,” she sneers, and I recoil, like she slapped me. “No, I suppose there isn’t very much that you understand, Elowyn.”

My hands tremble just slightly as I look at the pile of socks in my lap. I made sure to use a variety of different weights of yarn, different colors, taking every situation I could into account. There’s even a couple of pairs made with yarn enchanted to be waterproof, so that his feet aren’t soaked through if he ends up traipsing through a lake or pond or puddle.

Isn’t it a nice thing, I wonder, as my mother rises to her feet and leaves to return to her work, to make things by hand for others? And isn’t it good, to stand up for yourself if you’re being pushed?

Why does she always succeed in so often making me feel small?

Quiet, I put my work into the wicker basket at my feet and stand, looking around the room. It’s such a beautiful house. It’s so beautiful, and in my mind, my memories of it are not bad. Maybe things were often difficult. Maybe I struggled with an endless type of loneliness, in these marble halls and rambling gardens and handsome, dark wood furniture, but...

I wanted to see the good. I have always wanted to see the good. This time spent with my mother after a few months of being apart, though, has admittedly been taxing. I thought it would be a good idea. Gabriel would be free to see his family and crewmates without having to worry about looking after me, too, and maybe - just maybe - my parents would be impressed at how I might have grown and matured after being in the world for a while.

My father was happy to see me, at least.

Jareck looks up as I pass the door to the den that he has turned into his own personal armory, and I wonder if he can see the look on my face right away. He rises to meet me in the wall, and I blink as he gently grabs my arm.

“Has she been unkind again?” he asks me, softly, and I blink again, swallowing the lump in my throat. My eyes, though... I know they’re already glistening.

Just a few words. Just a few firm, cold words is all it takes to unravel me. Maybe my mother is right. Maybe I’m still a child. Maybe I still know nothing, understand nothing, that I am oversensitive and feel too much and don’t do enough for the amount that I talk about ideas and dreams.

Maybe I am the failure that she seems to think I am.

I don’t even say a word. Jareck simply hugs me, because he knows. He can see it in my face. He pets my hair, and I feel his chest fill as he draws in a breath, the way that he does when he’s trying not to be angry. For a moment, I feel frightened - frightened that he’s angry with me.

“Being home is not good for you, Elo-child,” he rumbles quietly. “This is no place for sweet girls.”

“Why is she always so unkind?” I blurt out, faster than I can stop it, and the tears follow. Jareck is quiet for a moment, still petting my hair.

“I do not know,” he sighs. “I do not know why your mother never has a civil word to spare you, little one. But I am sorry. Do not weep. It will all be alright. What did she say to you to rattle you so?”

Leaning back, my hulking Hrothgar of an uncle figure looks at me, watches me intently with his bright eyes as I ramble and cry. When I finish, he frowns, practically crouching down so he can wipe my eyes with his large hands.

“Your elf will love your gift,” he tells me firmly, but not unkindly. “Including your little hedgehog. He is prickly like one, no? Do no listen to your mother, Ellie. There is nothing wrong in what you do. She is...”

And then he stops, because he knows, even in the state I am in, that hearing someone speak poorly of my mother would hurt me.

“The moon is full and bright tonight,” he says instead, smiling as I sniffle. “Enjoy it. Take a walk out into the forest. It will clear your head. And, when you come back, call your elf. That might clear your head, too.”

But I didn’t want to call Gabe. Not because I don’t want to talk to him, but because... I am still afraid.

I’m still afraid he’ll think that I’m as sensitive and as ridiculous as my family seems to think that I am. That I am a waste of potential. That I am silly and useless and that I know nothing at all but how to be a child.

Even the mention of the full moon doesn’t register until I reach my old room.

It is pretty. My father made me a glass ceiling so that I could always see the stars and the sky - my fourth nameday present. Maybe my father would understand, if I... knew how to talk to him? If we were closer. We can exchange small talk and lighthearted conversations. I can beam as he excitedly explains his inventions to me, or I used to be able to go to him when I fell and scraped my knee for a pat upon the head and a bandage.

Other than that... I don’t know. I don’t think, at least, that he would make me feel the way that my mother does. He would listen to me. How much of me, though, would he be able to understand?

I don’t sit on my bed or a chair or the chaise. Instead, I sit upon the floor and criss-cross my legs, hugging my knitting basket to my stomach. I sit, and I gaze up through the glass ceiling to the full, glittering moon and all of her ladies-in-waiting in the form of stars... and I breathe.

My lips part, and it’s only then that I realize that my tongue hurts.

I had bitten it so hard while my mother laid into me that it had bled.

All because of a cute little hedgehog on a few pairs of socks that I was knitting for my best friend and... lover? Boyfriend? Person? My elf?

For my Gabriel. My sky pirate. My prickly hedgehog.

His teasing doesn’t hurt. His criticisms used to, but he knows where the line is of what I can handle and what I cannot. He tells me what I must hear without making it hurt or making me feel small, most of the time. I know his nature is brusque. He cares, at least, if what he says hurts me. He cares if they make me cry. He apologizes, and he does better.

For all of the hurt Gabriel himself has felt... for how different we are...

He is still kind. He understands. He adjusts for me.

The woman who birthed me can’t do the same - or, maybe, won’t. I can take a lot more punishment than she thinks. I can listen to her for a long time, ripping me apart, everything about me, before I let it start to hurt.

I hope I am strong. I hope that I’m good. I want to be brave, too.

I don’t want to be like my mother. I hope I’m never like my mother, if someday I should have a child of my own.

Bowing my head, I press my forehead against the handle of my basket, and give way to fresh tears. Even then, through tightly shut eyes, I can see the way the moon glitters. Sniffling, I lift my head, watching as a star shoots through the sky.

‘Don’t be sad,’ it seems to say. ‘Do not ache so. You’re never alone as you feel.’

I’ll watch the sky for a while. I’ll wash my face and I will pull myself back together, just like I did when I still lived in this place, each day. I am weak, maybe. Maybe that’s true. Maybe I am weak and small and silly.

Maybe it will feel better in the morning.

#am i projecting? yeah maybe but elowyn and me feel one in the same sometimes #ffxiv rp #ff14 rp #writing #this is weirdly paced #whatever

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quarterfromcanon · 5 years ago

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1-4. For the asks

Thank you so much for sending these! <3

Once I started to answer them, I realized there were comparatively few recent television shows appearing on the list. I seemed to keep gravitating toward older ones I remembered from years ago. I took a handful of days to mull it over in case I was forgetting something, but nothing else comes to mind. Maybe my ongoing list of Shows to Watch During Quarantine will turn up some fresh results but, for now, it looks like I’ll be taking a little trip down memory lane. :)

This turned out to be a pretty long and rambly post, so I’ll stow it under the cut!

Top 5 TV Shows

1. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - I can’t imagine this surprises anyone who has been following this blog for the past two years or so. It brought fellow fans into my life, got me back into writing fic, and prompted countless tags of meta. It’s the show my mind drifts to on a weekly basis (if not daily) even a full year after the finale. Just when it seemed I’d reached an age where that level of intense fandom involvement and character attachment might be fading, it proved that quite the opposite was true. I’m very thankful to the series for that, and for the people whose paths have crossed mine as a result.

2. Schitt’s Creek - This is my #1 Feel Good show and, though I’ve been dodging spoilers for the final season until it gets uploaded to Netflix, I get the impression that it will remain in that top spot. The world feels softer and more hopeful there. It’s healing for my soul. I’m going to have a dreadfully difficult time saying goodbye, but I’m glad there are six season to revisit whenever I want.

3. Stranger Things - The theme song alone sends such a rush of excitement through me. I love the aesthetic and the atmosphere. I sometimes have mixed feelings about the romances but the FRIENDSHIPS sure do have a direct line to my heartstrings. I think the way they’ve combined media influences into their own story is really neat. You get something that’s new and engaging, but you can also go back and enjoy the sources of inspiration with fresh appreciation.

4. Joan of Arcadia - I can’t help it. The snark, the jackets, the early 2000s songs, the performances -- the nostalgia for this show is so strong. It’s not without its problems, but it did have some really good things to offer as well. I remember an episode that was one of my earliest introductions to the concept of a trigger, and the effect it could have on a person if exposed to one of theirs. The series dealt a lot with grief and the many forms it can take (I STILL can’t hear Fiona Apple’s cover of “Across the Universe” without getting misty-eyed). I’m also surprised, looking back, at the somewhat positive way I recall them discussing homosexuality on the several occasions that it came up in the show. Not to give too much credit since I don’t think there were recurring canonically LGBTQIA+ characters but, for a kid who spent most days around closed-minded people of a certain religious leaning, it was meaningful along my individual journey. I’d like to provide the several examples that are most vivid in my memory:

A. A girl with short hair, short nails, little to no makeup, and a bulky leather jacket is generally assumed to be a lesbian by the bullies at school. The show directly confronts the fact that “gay” should not be used an insult, that identity should not be assumed without the person telling you so, AND makes sure that the character in question never pushes back by saying harmful things about lesbians despite not actually being one herself.

B. A boy who is questioning is able to confide in his big brother and have a fairly calm conversation about it; the awkwardness mostly comes from neither of them being accustomed to openly discussing emotions, not from the possibility of a negative response regarding the subject matter.

C. Another character is accidentally discovered to be gay (he only appears in the one episode, if my memory serves), and some of the leads have the opportunity to share that for personal gain. However, even though he is a popular jock who is a bit of a jerk in the hallways, the show makes it clear that the right choice is still to leave the telling of that information up to him and him alone.

Like I mentioned, it can’t be said that representation was in abundance here - for instance, I don’t believe anything other than straight or gay was presented as a possibility - but any accepting acknowledgement in a faith-centric series was something for me to hold on to in my still-deeply-closeted days. As a final Very Important personal side note, this show brought Judith Montgomery into my life (pictured below on the left), and that feels like it merits a shoutout for being what I consider a rather significant marker in my awakening.

THE OVERWHELMING CRUSH I HAD - and still have - is one for the books.

5. Pushing Daisies - This is another show with an aesthetic I adore. The series has such a fun, whimsical energy. The crime-solving! The clothes! The cast! There's a lot to love. It’s the kind of world I wish I could visit... well, minus the evidently rampant murder rate.

Top 5 Overrated TV Shows

1. Once Upon A Time - *deep sigh* I tried to stick with it for so long. I think I’ve seen five out of the seven seasons in their entirety. It just felt like everything got mired down by excessive (and increasingly convoluted) subplots, often for the purpose of tossing in as many fairytale and/or Disney characters as possible. Plus, quite honestly, there was too much emphasis on romantic love. For a show whose first season involved a curse being broken by [potential spoiler, I suppose] a mother kissing her son’s forehead, I ultimately found myself up to my ears in romantic ships. It reached such a stifling extent that, if you were not particularly attached to those pairings, there wasn’t a whole lot else to entice further viewing.

2. Under the Dome - I don’t know for certain what the general public opinion of this series was, but it felt like the commercials always featured alleged rave reviews, so I figured I could include it here. I was vaguely interested in Season 1, mainly as a fan of Rachelle Lefevre’s work. Season 2 pulled me in with the introduction of a new townsperson and I threw WAY too much of my heart into that attachment, which backfired when that character was killed. I made quite the spectacle of my heartbreak, so much so that my family doesn’t let me mention this show around them anymore. :P Season 3 was, to phrase it delicately, not a great time. The series did introduce me to a few new-to-me actors, though, so that was cool.

3. Bates Motel - Even the incentive of learning that the two characters I liked most share a lot of screen time later in the series hasn’t been enough to call me back to this one. I don’t know if it was the pacing that put me off or what, but the prospect of finishing the remaining seasons feels so daunting. There are evidently five seasons in total and I believe I’ve only seen two of them thus far. I will probably muddle through it someday just to see how it goes, but the fact that I am so disinclined to prioritize it made this feel like a fair addition to the list.

4. Lost - My interest in this series unfortunately waned right before fervent fandom spiked. I don’t have any specific complaints that come to mind about what I saw; I just sort of drifted and then stayed away. Teachers I liked and peers I spent time with were starting to latch on to the show and I couldn’t find even the slightest inclination to give it a second try. However, did I still dutifully read all the latest installments in my friend’s Sawyer Ford and Kate Austen fanfiction when she passed me handwritten copies at lunch? Sure. I was glad it made her happy, even if I was no longer a viewer.

5. Hemlock Grove - I say this as someone who still mourns the fates of some characters in this show, so I wouldn’t go so far as to claim that the series stopped being able to make me feel anything. I’m just of the opinion that, in some ways, it might’ve been better off stopping at one season. That’s where the book it was based on ends, and things just didn’t feel as cohesive after that. Season 3 especially was - borrowing from my above review of Under the Dome - not a great time. That being said, there are also certain elements from the book that I could’ve done without in the Season 1 adaptation but... well... here we are.

Top 5 Underrated TV Shows

1. Picnic at Hanging Rock - Another one that won’t surprise followers of this blog. I have rhapsodized about it quite frequently since I found it a little over a month ago. It’s a period piece mystery miniseries with LGBTQIA+ representation, gorgeous costumes, and Samara Weaving. This felt specifically designed to wedge its way into my heart, and I’m quite content with the space it now occupies.

2. Dark - I’m so intrigued by the overlapping timelines with all of the morally gray characters. It’s possible to like one of these people in the timeline where they’re young but dislike them as adults, or vice versa. It also makes me think of Rant by Chuck Palahniuk a little tiny bit with the idea that time travel, specifically tampering with your own timeline, might make you physically and behaviorally unrecognizable to yourself. And the SONG CHOICES! I have gotten some solid new music selections from this series.

3. Sense8 - I still need to watch the finale. I really do. But I knew it would make me sad so I’ve avoided it for... two years now? Pretty close, I think. The concept is fascinating and the cast is so strong. Plus the cinematography! They came up with some of the coolest ways to depict the link these characters share and what it’s like when they connect over distance. The planning and careful editing it all must’ve taken... I remain in awe.

4. Penny Dreadful - There were definitely some story/writing choices I didn’t particularly like along the way, but I did get engrossed in the creepy goodness and the performances -- Eva Green’s Vanessa Ives most of all. It left me wishing for more period piece “monster mash” stories, because having all those classic characters in one place was a blast. It also helped me understand why Helen McCrory was once slated to play Bellatrix Lestrange because she can be terrifying. Oh and Sarah Greene in her Wild West outfits? Perdita Weeks with short red hair in fencing garb, and later in all leather with boots and a long jacket? I WAS NOT PREPARED AND I HAVE STILL NOT RECOVERED. I NEVER WILL.

5. Wonderfalls - There’s some cringe-inducing handling of certain representation in the series, but I have such a weak spot for quippy outcasts who become reluctant chosen ones (Joan Girardi in Joan of Arcadia, Wynonna Earp, Jaye Tyler in this series, et cetera). I also really love the sibling dynamics here. They bicker, tease one another, help each other out of trouble, and have rare but genuine heart-to-hearts. Caroline, Lee, and Katie all did such a great job blending their characters’ adult personalities with certain childhood attributes that rise to the surface in the presence of family.

Top 5 Movies

1. Addams Family Values - I’ve rewatched this movie at least once annually since I found it in Media Play at age 13. Usually, I’ll play it around Halloween or, at the latest, Thanksgiving. It’s mouth-along-with-every-line level ingrained in my memory. I find myself leaning forward in my seat before favorite parts because I’m still that excited to relive them. Why this movie, and why this devotion to such a degree? It’s hard to explain, even to myself. I can tell you, however, that I hold up every other portrayal of the Addams characters to the versions found in this. Everybody in the cast just feels that perfect for their part.

2. Clue - I was already pretty fond of this movie to begin with, but then my sister got older and claimed it as a favorite of her own, so now she just supplies me with further excuses to watch it repeatedly. It’s also been a bonding piece of media with a couple of close friends and such through the years. It’s incredible to think not everyone in it was the first choice for their roles; what everybody brings to the table is so top-notch that I wouldn’t have it any other way. I also LOVE knowing that it originally went to theaters with different endings depending on which showing you attended. I gather people weren’t terribly thrilled with the stunt back then, but I kinda think some moviegoers would be into that approach these days? Then again, one hit that tried something different tends to start a fad, so maybe I’d end up regretting the suggestion after a while. :P

3. The Craft - This. Movie. Yes, Act III is a major bummer even though I know it’s coming, and I’ll always wish it ended differently. Even so. This. Movie. I tend to headcanon mostly for shows and sometimes books, but The Craft is a beloved exception. I love so much about it: the magic, the music, the clothes, the settings, the dynamics within the friend group, the performances. I had no idea when I first got the DVD at 17 that it would become such a part of my life, but I’m so glad it found its way to me.

4. Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion - The soundtrack is a glorious ’80s and ’90s treat for my ears. The colorful costumes are perfectly suited to the main characters’ version of the world. There are so many great lines and it feels like everyone is having a lot of fun in their roles. I LOVE HEATHER MOONEY SO MUCH. She’s my awful, scathingly sarcastic, little grungy grump and she fills my heart with joy.

5. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - I was pretty sure at least one of the three had to appear on here. I think, if I were to tally them all up, The Return of the King features most of my favorite moments, so it wins the spot. “I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you!”, ‘Edge of Night,’ Éowyn in battle, The Army of the Dead, ‘Into the West’... I end up crying during the end credits every time. So, yeah, ultimately, I would choose the third part of the trilogy if I could only watch one.

Phew, that’s it! All the questions answered, all the shows and movies listed! Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read it all, and thanks again to @monaiargancoconutsoy for sending in the prompts! <3

#About Me #Answered Asks

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nomimits7 · 6 years ago

Text

Mission Bangtan | 3

Title: MISSION BANGTAN pt3

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Ratings: M {Fluff & angst}

Warnings: language. Future violence. Talk of abuse.

Summary: As a professional eliminator you are ordered to get rid of Bangtan. A group of trained fighters hiding behind the mask of BTS. Your mission is successful until you get to know them. Will Y/N be able to complete the mission, or will she end up protecting her target from the real danger?

Authors notes; @feed-my-geek-soul thank youuuuuuuuuuuuu <3

Standing in the front row your nerves are ever increasing. You have no idea what to expect or how a normal human reacts to these types of situations. Do you scream? Do you cry or jump up? After observing two nearby fangirls you decided to just go with the flow. None of these strange feelings and emotions makes any sense to you. For the first time in your existence you don’t know what to do. You try and stay focused on the mission, but this seems impossible.

The lights dim, and for some or other odd reason you are excited to see these seven men again. Music starts rumbling through the speakers, lights start flashing and everyone starts going crazy with anticipation. You don’t know what to do but soon you find yourself screaming and going insane alongside the rest of the fans. The first song comes on and you recognize it as one of the songs on the album. One by one the seven appear on stage. Their voices entrance you, every movement, every wink, every grin, every time they made eye contact with you, you felt your perfect shell start to fade … you are left in aw for the rest of the concert. These seven men… why them? It’s this thought that brings reality crashing down on you. You have a mission and you let yourself become human.

You could never be human. You were a weapon that only had one purpose in life and that was to complete this mission. The mission you so casually forgot about. No, this was not allowed to happen again, but the concert was something you’ve never experienced. They gave off such energy, you were kept on edge the whole time. A roller coaster of unknown emotions flushed through you. Even though you barely knew any lyrics by heart you found yourself jumping to the beat the one moment and near tears the next. It was amazing how these seven men could make your heart skip a beat with just a few notes. It was clear that they poured their hearts into each song they sang. You saw people losing themselves within the lyrics and rhythm. Some even cried as the concert crept on. Even though this was all strange to you, you had the time of your life. You felt alive for the first time since... Deep down you wished you could stay like this forever, but fate had other plans for you.

They were saying their goodbyes and you had no clue on where to go next. Luckily one of the staff members escorts you and the rest of the VIP’s to a secluded room. It’s here that you had to wait. This at least gave you time to regain your act and get your head straight now you just needed to wait and see if they are following your plan.

She came. They saw her within the first five seconds of the show. A feeling of relief and uneasiness fell upon them. The relief from the fact that you showed and from the looks of it enjoyed it. The uneasiness from the fact that you looked so full of life, but at that fan meet… you where cold. Something was out of order, they just didn’t know what.

When the show finally ended, they were rushed back stage to prepare for the meet with the VIP ticket holders. To be honest… again they were nervous. What if they weren’t going to be so lucky this time…? None off then said a word all of them where to busy drowning in their own avalanche of thoughts. Tonight, they’ll get their answers, one way or the other.

It’s been a good forty-five minutes since you arrived back stage. This gave you enough time to prepare for what’s to come. No, Tonight won’t be their last, but you still had a plan. The other VIP’s weren’t your normal fangirls. They all looked like producers or potential popstars. You stood out from the crowd.

Uncomfortable was an understatement so you decided to just lay low for the first few minutes and figure out how to get close. No sooner has this thought popped up into your head than the doors opened to reveal them. All of them now-not-so-sweaty and looking fresher than ever. As soon as you saw them your protective screen shot up and your acting kicked in. You knew exactly what to say and how to act to get them on your side.

Laying low was your go to, but the one named Kim Seokjin had a different idea. He walked straight up to you.

“Hi, Y/N? right? I’m so glad to see you came to the concert. Did you enjoy it?”

“Hello, Yes I found it quite entertaining thank you, you guys can really move, doesn’t all that dancing make you tired? you don’t seem to be tired after such a show!”

A low chuckle escaped his lips at this statement. Shaking his head, he answered “After so many years of training you just come to a point where you’re use to it and that makes it extremely easier. Aaanndd we had a little rest before we came here”. His gaze never left you, taking in every detail of your reaction. He knew what he was doing.

You listen in amazement. You had to stop yourself from saying that you knew the feeling and you rather took another sip of … whatever this was what you were drinking. Time flew by as you and Seokjin kept making small talk. He told you remarkable stories of how he came to where they currently were. You on the other hand told him everything you could remember before the academy, about how you always wanted to travel the world and make your mark. He looked genuinely interested.

“I see Jin-Hyung made a new friend” Someone interrupted your laughing at one of Jin’s jokes. When you turned around you were face to face with Taehyung or ‘V’ as he requested you call him. His dark eyes were indeed very intimidating, and you felt the urge to be submissive to his demeanor. Jin only laughed and went to stand next to his younger band mate. “Ha ha, Indeed I have! Y/N over here has very good taste in jokes unlike you lot! She finds them quite funny.” Jin said while smiling broadly at you. Taehyung rolled his eyes and smirked at you, “Or she has been living under a rock for way to long. Anyway, I came here to invite Miss Y/N to join the rest of us by the couches, the rest of the guests have left, but we haven’t gotten around to talk to her. Y/N? Would you like to join us?”

A stunned expression over took your face. When did everyone leave? You were so caught up by Jin and his amazing stories that you failed to notice the other guests being told to leave. They weren’t your normal fans, but they seemed important. Why would they want to spend time with you? A ‘Normal’ fan? Why would they even care about a fan? I meant Fans only boost their sales, isn’t that what all artist care about? “Why would you want to talk to me? I’m just a fan” You said frowning at him. If you thought for one second you were intimidating him you were wrong, very wrong.

“Well, we do care about our fans Y/N. They brought us to where we are.” Turning to Jin he chuckled. “Hyung, I truly believe she has been living under a rock.”

Still frowning you followed him to where the rest were. As one they turned to look at you.

“Y/N, I’m happy you decided to join us.” Namjoon said with a dimpled smile. You found yourself sitting between Yoongi and Jimin, not the safest of places to sit. After a beat or so of awkward silence Jungkook raised his head. “So, what do you do Y/N. Like for a living?”

“Oh, I taught self-defense for a while, but seeing as I recently moved here, I’m still looking for an occupation.” This wasn’t a complete lie. You did teach self-defense to the new recruits at the academy, and you were currently unemployed by a normal company.

“Self-defense? You certainly don’t look like the fighting type. No offence, but you’re so small.” Hoseok said eyeing you up and down. “Yes, but like I said that was before I moved” you state as they let your words sink in.

“Well I think self-defense for a girl is a very good thing. You never know what’s waiting around the next corner. Anyway, what made you come? To the concert I mean…?” Yoongi added.

“Well, I’ve listened to your album and to be honest I’ve never really been to a concert. I wanted to experience the thrill of the whole thing. I mean after seeing your fans at the fan meet it must mean you are good at what you do. I had to see it for myself and I must say I am indeed impressed. Like I told Jin, I don’t know how you dance like that and still sound as if you’ve hardly done any dancing at all.” At this point you realized you are rambling. Awkwardly you started fidgeting with your hands.

An awkward silence followed. The seven not knowing if your claim is true or not, you not knowing if your truthful lie will work.

You decided to break the silence and hide your slipup with some of your own questions.

“So how did you guys become Idols?”

“Well… It sort of just happened. First Yoongi and Namjoon met each other, and the rest of us just joined on our own. We just clicked and BOOM! here we are.” Jin answered. The rest of the group seemed to relax at his statement. You made a mental note, this had to mean something, right?

Their answers and question had managed to confuse you even more and now you were doubting your own skills. Your biggest flaw was threatening to break through and you slowly felt a panic starting to rise in your gut.

Back to reality, your thoughts was cut short when Tae suggested that you all go out for some fun. You couldn’t believe this, they are celebrities and they want to do what……

You were so out of your league and you needed to take control of this situation again.

Idols going out for some fun with someone they barely knew. How interesting.

Internally you sighed with relieve. A distraction is exactly what you needed to get the flaw monster back in its cage. You all got up and made your way to the black SUV’s that awaited you. Are they going to kidnap you?

As if seeing your little debate inside you head Jimin put a reassuring hand on your shoulder and said. “We’re not going to kidnap you if that’s what you’re thinking. The black SUV’s are just another security measure to keep nosy fans at bay. It’s just one of the best ways to go from place to place without paparazzi following. Relax.”

Well, this wasn’t how you planned this to go at all. You decided to take the time getting to the destination to formulate a new plan.

Oh boy, you hate doing anything without planning out every move, but you couldn’t predict their every move. And in the course of 48 hours they have proven to be a deadly combination.

Seven against one…

part 4

#mission bangtan #bts #ot7 x reader #Part 3 #edited

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fallxnprxnce · 6 years ago

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Has Prince Nuada ever spoken too other fae Kings/kingdoms about his ideas on giving the world back to them? Has he been denied, decided against it or just not considered it? I feel that other fae races would be interested in joining him or at least discussing with it. I hope you are doing well, and thank you!

This is a great topic! I apologize forthis being so late, but I didn’t want to write just a quick answer, so I had towait until I had the proper amount of time and brainpower to do the thing, heh.

So… there are two ways to answer thesequestions. I have mused on this myself, imagining what Nuada would have doneand how other races would have reacted, and I have also discussed it atlength - both IC and OOC – with a goodfriend of mine and some of her muses. One muse in particular, actually, but sheshall remain nameless. She knows who she is. XD

As far as I’ve mused on the subject,early on Nuada would have approached other races about his gripes with humans,and later about his plans to eradicate them. Most other races of fae were notonly not interested in joining his cause but figured he would never see it cometo fruition anyway. They thought it was the ramblings of a petulant prince andnothing more.

The reason for this is because they seea war with humans as just as catastrophic as what the humans might do to theearth, except quicker and with a higher loss of fae life than if they just waitthings out. Chances are, most fae races will acclimate over timebiologically to things like pollution (after all, humans have in many ways),and will evolve and adapt in other ways to continue on as the earth changes.And the earth will change. I thinkthat’s something major that fae generally understand that Nuada does not isthat everything changes. Nothing remains the same forever. One must adapt tochange, not resist it. Versatility during hardship and change is what ensuressurvival, not exile and resistance.

The other reason they would not want to joinhim is becauseit sets a dangerous political precedent. Fae races and plenty of othertypes of non-humans races can be difficult to deal with, it’s true. They can bewarlike, reclusive, territorial, selfish, antagonistic… all of those things.However, when it comes to the overall planet and causes and cycles greater thanall races combined, the fae realize that cooperation is key. That is not to saythey’re going to start breaking bread with orcs and ghouls and certain speciesof trolls anytime soon, but it’s more like a general understanding of we’re all in this together. If Nuada,who is a representative of high Elven races whether he wants or intends to beor not, were to move against the race of humans and obliterate them, that meansthat anyone who has a gripe with anyone else can just decree or bring aboutgenocide in order to solve their problem. It’s a dire precedent to set, and it’snot one that is appreciated by anynon-human races, least of all the fae ones.

Biodiversity is celebrated among non-humans. Again, that does not mean all races like allothers, not by a long shot, but it just means that they are glad there are somany different types of races on earth. It keeps ecosystems alive, keeps cretainpopulations and borders at bay, and generally makes for an interesting earth tolive on. To wipe out one of the most dominant races on earth (just speaking inthe context of population size) should not and is not a viable or sustainable option. Fae races believe if Nuadagoes down that path, he will find that out a lot quicker than he will be ableto set his plan into motion.

Now… as far as what my friend and Ihave discussed both IC and OOC, it is her personal opinion and that of some ofher non-human muses that fae races wouldn’t just shake their head, call Nuadaan insolent upstart, and leave him to the karma of the universe to either righthim or stop him depending on how far he takes his plan, but rather they wouldactively seek to kill him themselves if things went too far. Before that? Theywould make it abundantly clear that they believe he is not only bigoted,hateful, and masquerading the horrors of genocide as a righteous path, but heis also incredibly ignorant and genuinely dumb. I’m paraphrasing for a specificmuse in particular, and if that muse would like to add anything to this littlemeta, she is invited to do so. I shall tag her associated human here: @queenrookandbishop

Why all the snark, rage, and intensedislike for Nuada from this muse and others? Aside from agreeing with myearlier sentiment of genocide not being a viable answer to anything, there are severalof very pointed reasons as to why fae races or any non-human races would beagainst eliminating humans, according to this outspoken muse. She has hit Nuadawith almost all of them personally by now I think, but he is showing clearsymptoms of pigheadedness. Surprise, surprise. Nevertheless, she’s right, so I shall the most important reasonsto not wipe out humans here:

1) Humans take care of a lot of shit on earth,so who is going to do that when they’re all gone? Yes, human make a lot of garbage and waste.Yes, they pollute. But they also clean up, remediate, treat, manage, store, andotherwise deal with their waste as well. Not all of it, to be sure, but enoughof it such that if all the humans disappeared tomorrow, everybody left behindwould be in big trouble in really not a lot of time. No more water filtrationfor plastic wastes. No more maintenance of nuclear power plants. No moremanagement of toxic waste sites with drums of deadly and/or radioactivematerials. No more environmental groups instituting things like beach cleanups,litter pick-ups, tree-planting events, running animal preserves and rescue operations,etc. If all the humans disappeared tomorrow, we’d be left with all the bad andnone of the good as far as what humans have done so far with the world. Maybetheir factories would shut down, they would no longer drive cars that releasegreenhouse gases, they would no longer be drinking water bottles and discardingthem in waterways, they wouldn’t be farming mass quantities of land withchemical fertilizers and pesticides, but you know what…? What humans havealready done is enough to pollute the world for centuries to come. And… whatthey are doing to remediate pollution and keep toxic waste contained and keeppotentially dangerous facilities up and running will suddenly stop… and evenmore contamination will be released into the environment with none of thecountermeasure to clean it or stop it. The consequences of human life endingsuddenly on earth far outweigh the benefits, to both the actual planet as wellas all other non-human races that inhabit it.

2) What happens to all the bodies of dead humansonce this genocide occurs? There wouldbe more bodies left to rot worldwide than there are microbes and predators capableof dealing with all that biological waste. Sure, some corpses will be scavengedby predator animals… Bears, large cats, not to mention predatory fae and othernon-human races. And bacteria and fungi will go to work, putrefying and rottingbodies depending upon their specific metabolic needs. But the need for these thingsto occur will far be exceeded by the number of bodies there will be. The GoldenArmy will kill humans fast. So whenthis happens and there are bodies everywhere, predation and natural rotting andrecycling of nutrients in those bodies will take a decent amount of time. Inthe meantime, bodies are leaking putrid fluids into soils. They’re falling intowaterways and poisoning them. Diseases are breeding in corpses baking under thesun. So much gas is released that the air becomes poisonous, and furthercontributes to global warming. It’s really not a good picture at all. Manyraces on land and in the water will be poisoned to death if not made very ill.Weaker individuals will die, and those left will have to deal with all thebiological waste somehow or risk much of the earth being uninhabitable for along time.

3) Many non-human races rely on humans as afood source! Vampires, largetrolls, dragons, rusalka, ghouls, wendigo, lycanthropes, etc. all feed onhumans. Some, like vampires, are entirely limited to humans such that, were allhumans to disappear, so would they… or else they would be reduced to drinkinganimal blood and become weakened and sick depending on which set of vampirelore you’re going with. My point is, taking out an entire food source that hadpreviously been so prevalent is going to rock the web of life and the foodchain considerably. Some races may die from lack of food, while others willbegin to eat other races… like elves,perhaps, potentially bringing about the extinction of other races who cannotsupport that level of predation.

In short… fae races and othernon-humans would have the common sense and wisdom to understand that taking outall humans is not the answer. So why doesn’t Nuada? After 2K+ years of life,why isn’t he wiser? My first answer is to call bullshit on Guillermo del Torobecause I think Nuada would be wiserthan that after all that time. There’s really no way he couldn’t be. But I’mnot going to do that because GdT is awesome and saying the canon is flawed isjust a copout answer anyway. XD So… I will go with a two-fold answer of 1) hisisolation after going into exile put him in an environment where he did notreceive very much constructive criticism or opposition. He isolated himself,stewed about his own ideas, and sought out other like-minded individuals (e.g.,Mr. Wink). That kind of lifestyle served to maintain, preserve, and perpetuatehis own ignorance. And 2) Nuada was poisoned by his own emotions, as we all knowis a definitely thing with elves. His anger, sadness, hopelessness, depression,etc. over what was happening to his people actually worked much the same waydepression does in humans… it chemically changed his brain to continue thatnegative thought pattern feedback loop, which then also led to him becomingphysically damaged by his own emotions as well. Ultimately, his way of thinkingwas actually altered by his emotions after spending enough time wallowing inthem without the help he needed or the opposition he potentially should havehad.

I hope this answered your questions,and thank you for sending this in! =D

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sleepy-sunlight · 7 years ago

Note

Hello lovely! I hope you are doing amazing! And may you get your inspiration back soon (trust me, I've been there before and it's not fun at all). Anyway, in hopes of sparking something can you write a piece about the inquisitor (whether at Haven or while they were on a mission as inquisitor) being kidnapped and the brave Cullen has to go save them! Have a lovely amazing day!

Of course, I’d be more than happy to write the request for you dear !!! I just hope that you enjoy and have a spectacular day!!!

———————————————————————————————————–

“Stop!”

You twisted your head around to see a small cluster of guards, their faces, and bodies shrouded by the slick, sleek metal of their armor.

“What is it?” Dorian wrinkled his nose, confused. “This land is Inquisition protected, isn’t it?”

“We heard nothing of your band of revolutionaries coming through here,” One of the men growled, a peculiar sort of crackle in his throat. “What have you got with you?”

“That’s none of your concern.” Blackwall huffed, narrowing his eyes, almost suspicious, his grip coiling around the mantle of his sword.

“Don’t test your luck,” The leader warned, glancing at you before waving a heavy hand. “Search through their things!”

Your companions groaned, yet uneasily brought themselves to relent at your assurances.

“There’s no need for any trouble.” You had remarked, nodding curtly to the ground despite your lingering suspicion of the apparent soldiers. “Just do as you must and we’ll be on our way.”

One of them nodded and they began to sift through your supplies, their questions seemingly mindless, as though only meant to fill the empty air.

To avoid the tension that threatened to flood every inch of the world around you.

“What’re you doing here?”

“Visiting my dear old grandmother,” Dorian scoffed, leaning against his staff. “Take a guess.”

“Have you heard anything troubling?” Another wondered.

“Is there anything ‘troubling’ we ought to be hearing about?” Varric retorted, laughing at the other’s huff.

But eventually, the questions stopped.

And were replaced with a single demand.

“You,” One of them pointed in your direction, your gaze widening like dinner plates. “Come with us.”

“What for?”

“You’re the one leading, aren’t you?”

You frowned, folding your arms across your chest. “Yes, what of it?”

“We need to talk. In private.”

Your expression deepened into a scowl. “Whatever you feel the need to discuss with me, you can discuss with them as well.”

Something like a chuckle emanated from the one speaking to you, nearly like a rumble rattling in his throat.

“Are you sure about that?”

You felt a chill run down your spine, looking back to the others, offering them a small smile to ease their worries.

But yours only seemed to worsen by the second.

For you knew what would happen if they were to remain.

“Go back to camp, I’ll meet you there after this.”

Your friends initially erupted into protests, practically stomping their feet like children in fits.

They relented, however with a single, pleading word.

“Please.”

They all gave a collective groan of frustration, Dorian pinching the bridge of his nose as he spoke out.

“Fine, fine, but if you’re not back by sundown I’ll-”

“I know, I know,” You grinned, laughing faintly. “So I’ll be sure to hurry back alright?”

They nodded reluctantly, tearing themselves away, but not without the skeptical sideways glances. The guards hardly even moving until your friends had disappeared amongst the towering woods.

Yet when they were gone, the defenders burst to life.

A bit of you had known better than to truly believe they had no ill-intent but the hopeful part of you managed to win over, merely wrapping your grip warily around your weapon, watching carefully while they moved from their plastered positions.

And they almost immediately withdrew their swords.

So what else could you do, but follow?

In the first few moments, all you saw were the clanging and clashing metal, a sharp screeching when the blades would slice along one another with piercing speed.

You had been able to cut some down before you staggered back, a blow dealt to one of your arms that sent crimson seeping from the now gaping wound.

“Who… what is it that you want…?” You rasped.

“You tell me, Inquisitor.”

That was when something clicked in your mind.

And before another moved to pin you down your launched yourself forward, ripping off one of their helmets, a body slamming you to the ground immediately after, the air knocked from your very lungs.

Yet in the few minutes, until your vision gave out, you saw the unmistakable red lines and markings etched on their face that only brought a single thing to your mind.

Red Templars.

Cullen had felt his heart soar to the clouds when he heard of your return to Skyhold in the coming days.

Not that he would admit that to anyone, of course.

But he had missed you terribly.

He always did, a deep unnerving pit growing in his stomach whenever you’d go on your travels.

But his heart utterly lurched when he found you to be missing.

A panic had been practically engraved upon all of your companions, a murky misery and guilt following not too far behind.

And if they had been bad, Cullen was nothing short of frantic.

He’d like to think of himself as someone more composed but everyone could see the light in his eyes had drained and the warmth and care that you had brought to him was suddenly snatched away from the man.

Only to leave him as the cold, yearning person of the past.

Dorian had explained the situation to him in a series of rambles, interruptions from the others while they paced about your commander, Cullen having wasted no time to meet them at the gates in a meaningless effort to greet you.

“We went back after them!” The mage exclaimed, tugging at his hair worriedly. “We didn’t even wait until sundown like they asked!”

“You shouldn’t have even left in the first place!” Cullen failed to stifle his snarl, shooting daggers at the trio. “Why in the world-”

“You act like we wanted to!” Blackwall snapped back, a rare gloss in his gaze that left even Cullen in surprise. “Now we all may not have been as close as the two of you but-”

He stopped himself, realizing just how loud he was becoming, softening his tone but not the rare emotion that surged through it.

“But… they’ve done a great deal more for us than anyone else,” He conceded. “So don’t you dare think that this was something we ever wanted.”

Cullen stared a bit in surprise and disbelief for a moment before he let out a heavy sigh, holding back his bubbling vexation.

“Then… then I hope you’re willing to help me resolve this.”

“Of course.”

They had agreed without even a second’s worth of hesitance.

But that alone would hardly be enough.

And quicker than one could blink Cullen began to plan.

Scouts were sent with your group to review the area, anything resembling a clue being sent back to him in an instant.

However, at one point he had been greeted by what could’ve perhaps been his great nightmare awakening.

Blood.

He couldn’t quite despite how much he prayed for it not to be yours, his entire soul having seemingly left to dangle on a string at the question.

Yet a bit of him already knew.

And it sent an anger unlike anything else roaring through him.

He came to implant himself at the war table and at his desk, planning through potential assaults and battles despite Josephine’s reservations.

“Maybe we could begin with negotiations rather than… total destruction…?“

“I prefer the second option.“

"You can’t truly mean that! What would the Inquisitor say if they heard you?"

"I suppose we won’t know since they were taken,” He remarked, listening to the diplomat’s scoff. “I’m taking matters into my own hands.”

“Will you at least try to listen to me?”

He let out a sigh, setting a steady grip on Josephine’s shoulders to look her in the eye. ,

“Josie, in any other situation I’d be more than willing to give you control but I have to draw the line here. I want them to not only regret their decision but to fear that they even thought of hurting the Inquisitor.”

She sighed, even as she gave in. “I know they often talk of doing ridiculous things when lovestruck but… you may have brought it to a whole new standard. You know that don’t you?”

He stepped back, dipping his head curtly.

“I pride myself on it.”

From then on, if he wasn’t dead set before, he was then.

And he didn’t stop until the day of the attack came.

He arrived with his troops to where all the clues and accounts lead, his blood boiling at the sight of the heavily guarded estate, his only desire then to tear it apart from its very bricks.

But even still, he had no worries.

Aside from you.

He had arranged and thought out every detail and idea that could’ve affected the offense, the only thing left to the imagination being the actual execution.

And that exploded to life in mere moments.

Soldiers upon soldiers rammed against the gates, tearing and ripping along the wooden frames until it all tumbled down to ruin, Cullen leading the charge, his sword and shield held tight in his grasp all the while.

He yelled out his orders as he stampeded through the fortress with a few close guarded people by his side, scarlet coming to nearly drench their armor through the constant clash with other guards. Tearing through each one with a ferocity Cullen hadn’t known, all the rage built up inside of him rearing out with a deadly force.

He didn’t even know when they’d finally make it to the dungeon, the commander not even taking a second to sift through the other rooms.

The only thing that mattered to him was finding you.

He couldn’t bring himself to stop until he did.

And eventually, he was met with such a blessing.

He was met with you.

The dungeon was craggy and ridden with age and sorrow melded deep upon the stones and cells.

And within one of those cells was you.

You were scattered with bruises, and searing, lingering gashes, your body hunched over despite your proudly raised head holding a steely unbroken glimmer in your eyes that lit up like pure sunlight at the sight of him.

“C-Cullen?” You shot up from your seat, your voice hoarse and strangled yet still overwhelming with a pure and utter delight.

“Love!” He scrambled for the keys they’d found from a fallen guard, wrapping you up in his arms as though even if the very earth itself shattered he still wouldn’t dare to let go of you.

He never wanted to.

“Y-You came for me…!” You mumbled, your tangling around him, nearly desperately, allowing yourself to unravel in his hold, even burying your head in the crook of his neck while you began to cry.

And Cullen began to break as well, the teardrops dribbling down his cheeks once he began to shake in his joy.

“Of course I did!” He hummed, to you, lifting your head to pepper your face with kisses, laughing as the immeasurable happiness you brought into his life flooded back into his heart, the anger melting to reveal only the endless adoration he held for you and for you alone. “I always will dear.”

And despite all that you’d been through, all the pain and hurt that had cascaded you in the past weeks, you felt truly safe then and there with Cullen.

But more than anything, you felt that familiar warmth bubble in your chest like a comforting fire flickering to life.

So for the first time in ages, you smiled.

And you felt truly happy, once again.

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theclosetpoet7 · 7 years ago

Text

And He Accepts Her Heart

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Notes on chapter: In which they say goodbye again.

Rating: T

Silent footsteps echo throughout the night as they navigate their way through the streets of Konoha. They just came from a late dinner with their teammates. And as cliche' as it always is, they said their goodbyes in Ichiraku Ramen. Well, it wasn't really their final goodbye before Sasuke sets out on his journey. In fact, they are planning to meet each other at the gates tomorrow.

However, it was their last meal in a long while.

How long is a while exactly?

Nobody knows.

But they enjoy each others' company even if this hurts all the members of Team Seven. Especially Sakura.

Leave it to Uzumaki Naruto to lighten up the mood though. And ever the cunning teammate that he is, because he has noticed the change in his comrades' dynamics, the blonde points a finger at Uchiha Sasuke and loudly declares.

"You have to walk Sakura-chan home."

Kakashi snickers into his orange book.

Sakura stares at him dumbfounded.

And Sasuke, fights down the urge to punch him.

"Dobe..."

"He doesn't need to you idiot!" Sakura cuts him off.

"But Sakura-chan! It's dark out!" If Naruto thinks that whining will get him into her good graces then he has another thing coming. Or he is simply delusional. His voice further irritates her. And she just couldn't contain the embarrassment upon being forced on Sasuke. Even if he has been walking her home for some time already.

Seriously, the Kyuubi vessel was ruining the moment.

"It's dangerous!" he further elaborates.

"Are you saying that I can't handle myself?"

She raises an eyebrow. With a hand on her left hip, she challenges her friend to dig his hole deeper.

"I... Uhm." Naruto squints his eyes, trying to find another reason to help his friends along the process of hooking up. Because it was taking them too damn long!

"Sakura, I'll walk you home."

All eyes turn to Uchiha Sasuke. He has his hands in his pockets and he has an indifferent face on.

"Sasuke-kun, you don't have..."

"I've been doing it since last month."

The revelation isn't one she expects him to admit. Well not yet at least.

"Wh- Whaaat?!" The blonde stutters out but his voice is clamped down when the Sixth Hokage hooks an arm around him and pulls him away from the scene.

Hatake Kakashi merely regards them with a knowing look and teasingly says.

"Don't forget to use protection you guys."

"Whaaaaaaaaaat?" If Naruto can get any louder, they don't really know. But Kakashi takes him away as he lets out a low chuckle and skips out of their sight.

The two remaining members of team seven just sweat drop at their comical antics. Though there is a conscious air around them at the implication of the closet pervert's words.

They fall into step with each other anyway.

Which leads us back to the duo at present.

Sakura nervously fumbles with her fingers clasped behind her back. She just couldn't seem to find the right words to tell him. The love of her life is leaving tomorrow. And though she is one of the smartest in this village, she can't think of anything to say. She searches through her brain but comes up with nothing. It doesn't take long for them to reach her apartment and she inwardly berates herself for being a coward. She actually knows what she wants to say. But from her previous experiences, pouring her heart out never works. When his motions indicate that he is about to withdraw, she lets out one last attempt.

"So, you're really leaving huh?"

Sasuke observes her quietly and lets out a tired sigh.

"Aa. Even if you have already forgiven me, it doesn't mean that everyone else has as well."

"I see."

She stares at him for a moment.

"There's no way I can convince you to stay?"

"Hn."

"Not even if I promise to make you tomato-based dishes everyday until Tsunade-sama finishes your prosthetic arm?" she lightly teases.

"Sakura."

It takes her less than a second to change to a more serious tone.

"I once promised that I would do anything for you Sasuke-kun. And I know that what you are about to do is good, noble even."

He gives her his silence to allow her to continue.

"But I just got you back."

She reddens at what she just said. Then wraps her fingers around her forearm as she looks to the side.

"I mean, we just got you back. And I know it's selfish, but I want more time with you."

She bows her head because there is already a rim of tears around her eyes and she puts the back of her hand to her nose to cover the sniffles.

"Or, is it because we're not enough for you?"

Bam!

He slams his right hand at her door, effectively pinning her in place. She gasps but does not cower in fear. She trusts him. She fully trusts him.

He lets out a "hn" and leans his forehead against her own. Then he releases a soft breath.

"Of course you're enough for me."

She blushes at his words but immediately crushes her own hopes because she is positive that he isn't referring to just her.

"Really?"

There is a sad smile on her face.

"I am glad that you still care about Team Seven, Kakashi-sensei, Naruto..."

He pushes away from the door and cups her face.

"And you."

The pink-haired Sannin's face heats up at her crush's proximity. They have never been this close before, face to face. Heart on heart.

"Sakura, the past few days..."

The young medic gulps in nervousness. His voice lowers to a low baritone.

"They weren't nothing."

______________________________

Sasuke leans in closer.

There is a sharp intake of breath as his teammate realizes what he is about to do. He feels his ears burning and there is a faint buzzing sound as he tilts his head to accommodate her better.

Sakura's eyes widen at first but she stares back at him, full of love.

Full of the potential to make him change his mind about leaving.

Her eyes are actually a deep emerald green with tiny yellowish specks, he notes, as he cautiously comes nearer, almost closing their distance. They were stunning. The fellow sannin raises a hand to hold onto his right bicep as she closes her eyes and purses her lips to receive his kiss.

The sharingan wielder lowers his lashes, eyes heavy lidded at the prospect of finally claiming her lips.

His hand grabs her shoulder and gently pushes her away. She is stunned but is quick to mask the rejected look on her porcelain face.

He resents himself for putting it there.

"I can't."

The dark haired nin manages to gasp out.

Sakura looks at him but because he is refusing to make eye contact, she decides to turn away.

"I understand."

He clenches his fist.

"I want to."

He grits out.

Sasuke almost catches his admission but fails to do so.

Because of course he wants to kiss her. Sakura was beautiful inside and out. And she was important to him. She had always been important to him.

"Naruto, You have to save Sakura no matter what."

He closes his eyes at the memory. At the time, he was willing to go all out even if it kills him. As long as he doesn't see those precious to him perish. Sakura doesn't really need his protection anymore, he thinks, as he regards her petite figure in front of him. She has become so strong.

And if he was being honest, he can tell her that he sees his future in her eyes.

And that the hand she fists in her shirt is one that he wants to hold on to and never let go.

Sakura is his future.

But it just isn't the right time. He had to redeem himself first, even if every minute spent with her entailed him to exert a lot of self control.

It would be so easy to fall in love with her.

So easy.

He might've already had.

But he needs time to sort his feelings out.

Because Sasuke can't remember a time when he was feeling anything other than the thirst for revenge.

So he steps back.

Upon sensing his distance Sakura surprises him yet again.

"I want to kiss you too Sasuke-kun."

There is a red tint to her cheeks and she is nervous in his presence.

The admission has him at her mercy though, and he fights for the last bit of self restraint he has to stop himself from kissing her anyway.

"It wouldn't be right. I'm leaving tomorrow."

She flinches at his words. Sasuke knows that he is hurting her in this moment. But he doesn't know how to explain himself yet. What good would it do her if their first kiss was one out of sadness from their impending separation?

She deserves something more.

She deserves his eternal commitment.

(Though he knows that there could never be anyone else for him aside from her.

Only Sakura.)

And she deserves someone better.

Not the current him.

Not the soon-to-be wanderer who has too many sins to atone for.

It is then he realizes that he wants to be better for her too. Not only for his clan. Not only for Konoha. But for Sakura.

For Sakura.

He takes another step back, trying to find the right words to end their night. But Sakura, as she predictably does, stops him again.

"Can I just tell you one thing?"

The young Uchiha nods his head.

"I know you probably don't want to hear this Sasuke-kun. But I'll wait. I'll wait for you! No matter how long it takes. So you can take your time in searching for yourself. Do your best in everything. Yakusoku. I'll wait for you. "

His eyes widened at her proclamation. Why is it that she always seemed to be all that he needs? She always knows what to say.

"It doesn't matter if your journey takes you away from us. From your friends. From me. You don't even have to hold yourself back from meeting someone else. Just tell me if you do. And eat properly! Well, I know you are particular with the quality of your food, so I guess I don't have to tell you that. Watch out for mischievous women! You're too handsome for your own good Shannaro...Don't overwork your body. Also, don't be too hard on yourself..."

She is rambling.

And Sasuke finds her cute in the way she lets out those sentences like she is running a marathon.

Sakura couldn't help but reach out to his right hand and grasps it tightly into her two small ones.

"... try to enjoy an onsen once in a while. Take the soldier pills I gave you. I know they taste bad but they're tomato flavored! A special Sasuke flavor. And please don't let a wound get infected. You're such an idiot sometimes, refusing medical treatment..."

Her shoulders shake as she tries to hold back her tears. But she finally holds her head up high and smiles at him.

"Write to me too! If you can. You don't need to tell me all the details but just let me know that you are alive. And lastly, don't worry if a stupid nin makes you feel guilty, heck don't worry if the whole world is against you. I'll beat them to a pulp if they do. Well, if that baka doesn't get to them first."

Sasuke lets out a smirk and holds back his own words to hear her out.

"I'll wait."

He nods his head as she tells him again.

"So when you find whatever it is you are looking for. Come back. Come home to us."

She blushes deeply this time.

"Come home to me."

Uchiha Sasuke sees Haruno Sakura in her rawest form. Her heart is out for him to see. She wears it on her sleeve and dons it as her armor. He closes his eyes and imagines taking it into his tainted hands and becomes conscious of the fact that he wants to treasure it.

He wants to treasure her.

So he pulls her to him without even thinking about it. He wraps his remaining arm around her as he breathes in her lemon shampoo. And he allows himself to be selfish. He allows himself to be selfish when it comes to this girl.

"I'll hold you to it then."

______________________________

A.N.:

Yakusoku: Promise

Just a little something I've been typing in my notepad. I hope you guys like it. Maybe it's obvious but this takes place the night before Sasuke leaves again. I might need to edit a little in the future. But Enjoy!

P.S. : I hope you guys forgive me for taking too long to update Sore ga ai deshou and Revolution. Take care!

Eat, Breathe, Love and Think SasuSaku

#sasusaku #sasusakufanfic #sasusakufic #ss #sasukexsakura

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