#had some struggles with the walker in the background

[starry-eyed-wild-child]

🌻 charlie walker boyfriend headcanons 🌻

charlie walker x reader

. my sweet, sweet baby charlie - this man is so obsessed with you

. like it's low-key creepy but in such a sweet way you'd never even know

. i like to imagine you probably met in his film club, but he'd probably seen you in the hallways at school and he was just smitten after that. or even if you sat behind him in history class or smth and he tried his hardest to not look at you

. will be the most loyal boyfriend you could ever imagine, this man would die (and kill) for you in a heartbeat

. okay so, either you had to ask him out OR a bunch of mutual friends grouped together to get yous together because they were just sick of your pining

. honestly, robbie's ears are talked off about you, poor guy can't catch a break

. speaking of robbie, he definitely teases charlie about his little crush and will subtly drop hints in front of you just to embarrass him

. but robbie is also definitely 1000% your biggest fan, this man would literally make a movie just about how awkward your get together was, he adores you and thinks you're perfect for his best friend

. charlie stutters a lot when talking to you, he just struggles to believe he actually pulled you, the girl of his dreams. and he BLUSHES too, omg this man is a walking mess for you

. movie dates ofc are a given, if you're not a fan of horror movies, charlie will still happily sit and watch whatever you want. i personally think that charlie would draw the line at rom-coms tho, but that's just my personal opinion. like he will, but he'll criticise it all the way to the credits

. charlie is 100% a night owl. you'll probably be waking up as charlie is getting ready to go to sleep. not that he likes watching you sleep or anything 😳

. BOARD GAMES - play some cluedo with this pathetic little man, he lives for board game nights. play some music in the background, a bottle of cheap rum or smth between the two of you and that's charlie's dream night fr

. absolutely loves holding your hand in public. I don't think that's charlie's that big on pda but he's a sucker for hand holding and nose kisses

. is the king of remembering little details about you. remember that necklace that you got when you were six but lost somehow? no? charlie definitely does and would probably get you a new one

. his favourite thing is your eyes. it's his absolute favourite colour. he'd get a bracelet specifically with a stone that is the same colour so he can look at it when he misses you

. loves listening to music with you and making you your own playlist. he's the stereotypical romantic of where he loves sharing earphones with you so you can listen together 🥹

. okay I hate to admit it, but charlie is probably a terrible cook. BUT he tries his hardest to cook your favourite foods for you just to see you smile

. the most giggly, awkward boyfriend you've ever had and ever will have. he loves your smile, he's always trying to make you laugh

. I have a theory that charlie's laugh is very contagious. this man would giggle once and have the whole class in a fit of giggles because his laugh is just so adorable

. wear. his. shirts. this man LIVES to see you in his clothes

. would probably eventually end up giving you the ones he doesn't wear anymore

."they look better on you anyway" 😖 an absolute sweetheart

. soft, gentle kisses are the usual. he's so gentle with you like he's scared you'll break ALTHOUGH when he kisses you, he will grip at your waist really tight

. will not, under any circumstances, have you involved with the ghostface killings. charlie can be quite frightening when he's angry so he makes sure jill knows her place

. would probably lie to you about his involvement, as much as he hates lying to you, he couldn't stand the thought of you hating him and leaving

. no seriously, charlie would have a full on mental break down if you were to ever leave him or break up with him

. speaking of breaking up with him, lol, yeah no... not happening. it's the last thing he'd let you do

. the relationship is low-key a bit toxic but in a 'you can't leave, you're the only person I have' kinda way? y'know?

. sex would be hella awkward at first, charlie would have absolutely no clue on what to do, poor boy :(

. he just wants to make you feel good. speaking of which, PRAISE. praise this man, he thrives of knowing how good he makes you feel

. loves you on top, and when you tug at his hair when you're close to finishing

. is the most whiny mess during sex. he's so LOUD. he moans, groans, whines and whimpers so much and he's not embarrassed by it either

. makes sure you cum first every single time. charlie will not stop until you do, even if it take until morning

. king of aftercare. he'll clean you up, cuddle with you, talk with you, make you a cup of tea and a snack, All OF IT

. don't be fooled though, he loves some aftercare himself. playing with his hair as you lie on him, completely blissed out. cuddle him, tell him how good he was, and boy MELTS

. overall the dream boyfriend and i'm desperate for a charlie in my life (rory culkin a chance, please?!)

. 100/10 would recommend

[nicoleshifting]

my walking dead alexandria dr

here's a little introduction to this dr, which is currently my main focus when shifting! I have partially shifted to this dr countless times.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

about me:

name: nicole blackwell

age: 24

s/o's: rick grimes and daryl dixon

my closest friends (other than rick and daryl) are rosita, sasha, maggie, and carol, but I pretty much get along with everyone in our group.

in general I have become quite an expert on array of weapons but my strong suit in this dr is being a sharp shooter.

some songs I associate with this dr:

✩champagne coast- blood orange

✩no. 1 party anthem- the arctic monkeys

✩kiss it better- rihanna

✩anything- adrianne leaker

✩BODYGUARD- beyoncé

(tw for suicide mentions)

background info:

prior to the apocalypse, I was in college majoring in creative writing and minoring in theater. during my senior year of college, my mental health took a major plummet and I found myself in the worst mental state I had ever been, struggling with the thought of what to do after graduation, trying to work a low-paying job, and already crippled by student loan debt.

when the apocalypse broke out, I was in an inpatient facility recovering from an attempt on my own life. (my mental health is something I have struggled with for a good portion of my life in both this dr and in my cr, and this was not something I had scripted into this dr, but something I found out about this reality via channeling. this is not something I take lightly/would script in randomly. this is something that is very relevant to my experience in my cr so that's all I will really say about that)

my survival instinct has kicked into overdrive in this new landscape I have found myself in, and though this world presents its own unique challenges as opposed to life before, it is a world I find myself thriving in more than ever before.

I started off with my family at the beginning of everything breaking out, but don't know what ended up happening to them. (this was something I learned via channeling) I then drifted between random groups of people and often found myself on my own for a while. I end up making my way to the prison that rick and the group had made a home in and am nearly at the end of the road myself as I find myself exhausted, injured, and struggling to even stand. daryl finds me in the woods outside the prison and ends up bringing me in, advocating for the group to aid me.

with reluctance, they do- under the pretense that I'll be hitting the road as soon as I'm better (spoiler alert- I'm not going anywhere).

some small canon divergences if anyone is curious: rick has no kids in this reality, tyrese is still alive and so is hershel (and he never lost a leg). in general, walkers are not very strong and relatively easy to overpower and have no strong smell (otherwise I think I would be blacking out from the stench). also negan/the saviors are nonexistent.

upon first shifting to this reality, it's the first day we have arrived in alexandria and are still adjusting to the community.

I feel like that's all the pertinent information for now. as I receive more information via downloads/channeling that I have an interest in sharing/feel comfortable sharing I will update this! (also as I continue to shift to this reality this may be updated as well lol).

[lianasyappingsession]

Our First Christmas

Carl Grimes x fem!reader

"it is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air"

cw: none other than the zombie apocalypse implications?

tropes: friends to lovers, found family.

summary: you decide to secretly throw a surprise Christmas party for your friends and accidentally end up kissing your best friend under the mistletoe

a/n: LATE MERRY CHRISTMASSS 4 THOSE THAT CELEBRATE!!! this was very rushed as i literally thought of this last night but it's done!! hope you enjoy!

• • • • • • • • • • • • •

You knew that holidays were pretty much non-existent nowadays.

The world ended, didn't you get the memo?

Still, here you were all giddy as you finished wrapping your last gift.

Today was Christmas Eve, tomorrow being Christmas. Don't get it wrong, you weren't 100% sure that you had the dates right—there were days that you were too busy to remember or you simply forgot— but it was basically Christmas give or take some days.

You made sure of it.

You had been tracking time since forever.

It may sound silly to others but you have been keeping count of the days since you were eleven when you promised a certain someone that you wouldn't spend your life trying to conquer time, rather you would let yourself forget it for a moment now and then.

So you did.

Obviously the first few years of adjusting nobody worried about things like birthdays or holidays. It didn't matter. There was simply no time.

It did to you though.

The only real constant that you've had since the world went to crap was time.

It never left.

Once you got to Alexandria it was even easier to track time because you had a stable living environment. You could write it down, hang it up, even tell people the date.

So that's how you remembered Christmas.

A few months ago you went on a supply run with Daryl. You agreed to go for basic needs like food and clothes but you secretly were searching for little gifts for your friends.

Since then you had agreed to go on any run you could. Sometimes you even had to sneak out over the wall just so you could specifically look for valuable items.

All of your friends had such different personalities and backgrounds that it made present searching both fun and awful.

You struggled trying to find gifts for Daryl and Sasha but it was easy to find stuff for Maggie or Carl.

The more you knew about a person the better.

To say it took you awhile to find gifts is an understatement.

You nearly got bitten or died a total of seven times (not that you were counting), got lost and confused your north from south at least five times, and only had three incidents where someone almost found out what you were planning.

But anything for the holiday, right?

The weather was extremely chilly and it snowed basically every few days. Winter's were not fun and you could understand completely how back in the olden days how people died from the weather.

It's no joke.

Anyway, back to present time.

You were in your bedroom of your shared house with Maggie and Glenn. You were sat on your bedroom floor surrounded by colorful wrapping paper and tape. You had been keeping your gifts under your bed for awhile but since it was Christmas Eve you decided to take them all out and finally wrap them all.

Glancing around your floor you could easily tell what belonged to who.

For Rick you got a fancy looking pistol, simple but you remember him having one similar to when you guys were at the campsite so you thought it was good enough, plus you had two things of ammo.

For Michonne you got her a leather scabbard. It was about time she had a new one but she would never have time to go look for one. You came across it by accident so it was a win.

For Daryl you got him a jumbo pack of arrows for his bow. Even if he didn't complain you could tell that he hated to waste his arrows on walkers, especially when he lost them afterwards. So you figured he would appreciate it.

You got Rosita a black leather jacket, Eugene a dictionary, Judith a small collection of teething rings, Abraham nearly got a bottle of rum but you settle with a pair of black boots, and Carl a whole volume of this cool sci-fi looking comic series.

Oh, Carl.

You actually spent so long trying to make sure that whatever you got Carl was perfect.

You could have simply got him the first set of comic books that you found but you wanted it to be special.

It was your first official Christmas together after all.

It was hard to keep your surprise Christmas a secret from Carl, he was your best friend after all, but you wanted it to really be a surprise.

Everyone needed a break from the world.

It had been too long since you all had a chance to really celebrate something other than successfully preventing walkers from killing you all.

It was nearly midnight.

As soon as you were sure that enough people would be asleep you were going to head downstairs and over to the church.

It was more of a place where Rick gave meetings and announcements but it was basically like a town hall so you were going to decorate it to the best of your ability.

Here's the plan:

Bring all the gifts to the church, they'd obviously have to go on the stage area but under what exactly? Well luckily for you your community lived surrounded by trees and it wasn't exactly illegal to cut down a random tree.

So that's what you did.

Of course it wasn't a HUGE tree but it was skinny and maybe three or four feet tall. You had kept it in the cellar of your house for a week or so. How you snuck it inside the walls without anyone seeing was a mystery even to yourself. You were sure that someone would have seen you but nope.

You would drag the pine tree across town and into the church, it would go inside this pot thingy that you found to stand up, you would then decorate this tiny tree with a few ornaments.

It. Was. Tough. Finding Christmas ornaments.

The world ended during late spring, early summer, so stores didn't exactly have Christmas decorations out then. You had started searching for decorations way before gifts because you knew that it would have been so difficult, and it was.

Luckily, you found a bunch inside the basement of a random town house.

Boom. Tree, presents, decorations, all check.

You spent maybe an hour or two decorating the small church, putting garland on the back of each row of seats and on the windowsill, adding a wreath to the doors, and you even managed to find a small thing of mistletoe to hang up above the door.

Everything looked perfect.

The sight made you smile, this is how it should have been.

You sat on the bench for awhile once everything was done and accidentally fell asleep.

.

.

.

You woke up to the feeling of someone gently nudging your shoulder.

You could feel the hard, cold, wooden bench and it made you uncomfortable. Sleeping here was not recommended.

Wait. Sleeping here?

You suddenly jolt awake. You glance up and see the tree and gifts and decorations and then turn your head to see your friend, Carl.

Carl was standing there and staring at the sight in awe.

"Did you... did you do this?" He spoke and you could see his breath leave his mouth.

I sat up straight and rub your arms in an attempt to warm yourself up.

"Do you like it?" You asked.

He looked at you and then back straight ahead and crossed his arms.

"Do I like it? This is incredible. How did you manage to do this?" He was in disbelief.

You shrug. Right before you could open your mouth to respond you both heard a gasp from behind you.

You turn your head around to see who's there.

Rick and Michonne were standing there with a mix of awe and confusion on their faces.

Rick's gaze flickered from Carl to you and then he walked up to the two of you. Rick looked at you with a knowing look.

"You did this?" He asked.

You nodded. "Yeah." You answered and you could see your warm breath in the air. Gosh it was freezing.

You continued to rub your arms up and down and stood up. "I thought it would be good to try and bring back the holidays. We don't get to do things like this anymore.."

As you spoke Carl must have noticed how cold you were so he stood beside you and gently put his scarf on your shoulders.

You grabbed onto the scarf and smiled at Carl.

These small interactions were normal to you two but little did you two know that Michonne was smiling at the sight of you two.

.

.

.

An hour or so later everyone was up and was able to take in the sight of Christmas.

It was a huge surprise to everyone just like you planned. Everyone was genuinely happy for once.

It was perfect.

Eventually it got too cold to stay in the church so most people moved the celebration to Deanna's house. On your way there Olivia asked if you could run to the pantry and get some chocolate in order to make cookies.

She figured it was a special occasion so why not?

You agreed and made your way over to the house. While you were walking you heard footsteps coming up from behind you. You turn around and see Carl running after you.

"Wait up! I'll come with." He said.

You two walk through the snowy streets of Alexandria together. It somehow seemed warmer when Carl was near you.

Once you got to the house you went up the steps but didn't realize that there was a huge patch of black ice on the second step.

You went to run up the stairs but slipped on the ice and fell backwards.

You expected to hit the hard, cold, and snowy pavement but you didn't. You instead felt the grib of hands on your arm and back.

Carl had caught you.

"You need to be careful." He breathed out.

You shakily regained your composure and stood up straight. "Right, sorry."

You two entered the house and you walked towards the back and into the pantry. There you saw the deep freezer. It was full of frozen veggies, meat, and of course—chocolate. You grabbed two bars of Hershey chocolate and shut the deep freezer.

Carl was standing in the doorway with his hands in his pockets and leaning against the door frame.

You turned around to face him and for a few moments you two just looked at each other.

"Thanks for doing all this," He spoke, "Seriously, it's so cool that you managed to do this for us."

You smiled. "It was time that we went back to celebrating something normal."

Carl glanced up at the door frame. His eyes stayed there for a few moments and slowly your eyes followed.

There hanging above your guy's head was a small mistletoe.

"How'd that get here..?"

"Must've been Olivia? I guess when you see snow that's enough reason to remember Christmas."

"I guess.." You trail off and your gaze goes from the mistletoe to Carl's face.

What was that saying again? The tradition?

"Don't people usually kiss in this situation?" Carl asks with a hint of sarcasm in his voice but it also has a hint of something else.

He then looks at you. His eyes examined your face. You could see his eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips but then back up quickly.

"Should we?" You ask after a few moments.

It was bold. Too bold.

Carl stared at you with a surprise look.

You immediately get embarrassed for asking and feel your cheeks start to redden.

"Gah! Sorry, that was dumb, um, sorry I don't know why I said that. Forget it." You quickly said.

Carl immediately shakes his head. You could tell he was just as embarrassed as you were.

"N-No, no, no! Uh, no, um—do you want to? I mean it's what people do, right? Just a tradition." He says and his voice gets softer.

You fumble with your hands and nod.

"Right.." You say quietly.

He got closer to you. You two were maybe a foot away from each other. It was cold in the room, house, but this feeling of excitement warmed your body up.

Somehow every time you were with Carl your body made it feel like it was summer time.

He was standing in front of you now. So close he could simply reach his arm out and his hand could graze your cheek.

You know this because that's exactly what he did.

His touch was so gentle, so soft, it felt like you could melt into him.

Without any more hesitation Carl leaned forward and brought his lips to yours. It was softer than you imagined, gentle.

He pulled his lips away from yours just for a few moments and you then brought his lips back down to yours and returned the kiss.

Your hands inched their way up to his scarf to pull his body closer to yours. Meanwhile his own two hands found themselves on your waist. It felt natural. Like this is how it was meant to be. This kiss means more than just a Christmas tradition, it was real. Full of emotions even if it was soft and slow.

You could feel the eagerness as his grip on your waist tightened.

You both pulled away for air and you couldn't help but smile.

You went to speak but suddenly there was the sound of footsteps on the porch and the front door opened.

You both quickly let go of each other in order to remain your composure.

A few sec later followed in Olivia. She stopped and stood in the hall. "You two okay in here? I started to worry, everything else is already ready, we just need the chocolate."

You turned and smiled at her. "Yep! Sorry, um, everything's fine! Here's the chocolate bars." You pulled the Hershey bars out of your pocket and handed them to her. She accepted them and put them in her own pockets before smiling.

"Okay then, let's go, it's freezing in here." She prompted.

You glanced at Carl and nodded towards Olivia. She turned around and started back down the hallway. You followed after her and so did Carl.

Once outside the house it was snowing even more than before. It was so cold and you didn't have gloves. Out of nowhere you feel a hand slip into yours, Carl.

He held your hand all the way to Deanna's house, he didn't even let go once on the porch.

Olivia went inside and you two stopped walking. You turned your head to look at him and the way he was looking at you?

Gosh.

"Thanks for Christmas." He whispered.

"Heh, of course."

"Things may be bad but I'm glad that I have you. Christmas or not—you're my gift."

You smiled and glanced at the snowy ground.

"Please, just wait. I'm not done. Next I'll be celebrating birthdays. Especially yours Mr."

He laughed. "Of course."

He stepped forward and opened the door for you.

"Let's get out of the cold." He said and gestures for you to enter.

"Thank you." You say and enter the house.

Christmas had turned out better than you expected, and you couldn't wait to celebrate New Years next.

After all, who said that you hadn't planned for that as well?

[gothushi]

U and bralker but u make them fuck and whoever cums first has to watch you fuck the other without touching themselves

i spent so long on this bc ugh… i just had to get it right. fem reader, voyeurism, mostly sub Simon but he’s just whiny, light spanking, unrealistic prep

“What?” Both Brendan and Simon gawk at the same time, well.. Simon gawks and Brendan just raises a brow.. The smirk on your face grows as you laugh, sat back comfortably in the chair in your room.

“You heard me. I wanna watch Brendan fuck you.” Your eyes avert to Simon first, then Brendan, “What? Not really any different than what we usually do.” Except what you three usually do involves all three of you.

“What about you?” You could’ve sworn there was a pout on Simon’s pretty lips as he asks.

“I wanna watch.” A smile graces your lips, smoothing a finger over your nail polish, admiring the rings on your finger before resting your hands in your lap, “So? Get to it, you aren’t shy are you?”

The slight mock seems to spur them on, well, Brendan at least, because the suited man is grasping Simon’s jaw and tugging him into a messy kiss. It pulls a noise from Simon, some strained kind of whine, taking just a moment to kiss back. One thing leads to another, grabby hands pushing off clothes until Simon’s getting pinned down, naked, some snarky remark being said about him getting fucked, which earns a hard slap on his thigh from Brendan.

“Ah! Easy,” He complains, back arching whilst Brendan’s hand shoves him face first against the bed, cheek smushing into the covers.

“Quiet Walker, just put on a pretty show, okay?” Brendan chuckles, sucking a ringed finger into his mouth to coat it with spit before rubbing at the rim of Simon’s exposed hole, making him gasp softly against the duvet on your bed. He pushes in, slow, other hand pressing down on the small of his back to accentuate his arch. Simon makes eye contact with you where you sit, his hands curling into the duvet, brows pushing together as he’s stretched. The Irishman is surprisingly gentle for now, letting him adjust before adding another finger. Walker bites his lip, blue eyes fluttering and struggling to maintain eye contact as he whines at the stretch.

His little noises fill the air for the few minutes Brendan stretches him, before he’s undoing his belt, the buckle clanking together as he doesn’t bother with fully taking off his pants, just shoving them open enough to get his aching cock out. You get to watch the way Simon’s eyes flutter and go hazy as Brendan smacks his cock on his hole a few times, and then watch those pretty blues squeeze shut with a pleasured look covering his face as he pushes in, easing in slow. “Fuuuck, look at that.” Big hands grope at Simon’s ass, letting him get used to the feeling before he sets a brutal pace.

Simon yelps, sounding like he’s been punched in the gut before he arches, gasps, starts moaning with every meet of Brendan’s balls against his own. It makes his face flush a deep red, color traveling down his neck as he squirms. “I have an idea.” You speak, grinning whilst Brendan doesn’t stop but just keeps a hand grasping on Simon’s ass as he looks at you, the other hung limp at his side..

“And what’s that idea, huh love?” How does Brendan sound so composed whilst fucking into him like that? Simon wants to whine, complain, but knows better than to interrupt you as you start speaking again, stuttering little moans escaping him as background noise.

“I have a surprise for whichever one of you cums first. Though you’re probably not gonna like it.”

“So– nnnhah– a punishment?” Walker pants, eyes struggling to stay open as he looks at you from on the bed.

“Smart boy,” You coo, grinning at him, “but I’m not telling you yet. So have your fun!” You wave your hands as if for them to continue even though Brendan hasn’t stopped fucking into him anyway. That does however prompt him to go faster, harder, making Simon whine as his body jolts with every thrust, hair falling in front of his eyes.

This is bad, Brendan’s angling his hips just right to continuously hit Simon’s prostate with every other thrust, his hands groping as the latters ass, knows his body too well and what things make him tick, sending him hurtling towards that pleasurable peak. His cock hangs between his thighs, leaking onto your bed, the sheer force of Brendan’s thrusts making his ass and the backs of his thighs turn pink from the skin on skin impact.

“Stop– asshole, fuh–hahh!” Words fail him as he grabs at the duvet in his fists, not even able to make eye contact with you anymore as he has to squeeze his eyes shut and focus on not cumming. Brendan only cackles a laugh, hand coming down to smack hard on Simon’s ass, “Ah! Oh fuck–“

“You’re gonna lose Walker, suck it up,” He groans, “barely even started too.” Brendan’s eyes flutter closed, hands on Simon’s ass for leverage before they slide down to grip his waist.

The hot hands gripping so hard they might bruise makes him let out a pathetic whimper, “Shut up– nngh!” Simon’s back bends, arching up before Brendan forces it back down, Simon’s knees parting further and sliding until he’s fully laid on his front, dripping cock pressed between his tummy and the bed. The sensation makes his eyes roll back into his skull, a lewd whine escaping him, “Stop– Brendan I’m gon- ah! I’m–“ He can’t even finish his sentence, hips grinding back on Brendan’s cock before down into the bed as he orgasms. His thighs shake, spasming, toes curling and feet kicking the bed as Brendan growls a moan and pulls out, panting.

“Simon loses!” You declare with a giggle, grinning wide.

“That he does,” Brendan agrees, smoothing his hands up and down Simon’s back in a soothing manner, the latter laying there like a wet sock. He grumbles something unintelligible, pulling another laugh from you.

“Don’t pout baby,” You coo, “you didn’t.. not agree to this.” With that said, you get up from your vanity chair and go over to Simon, kneeling down on the bed beside him with one knee as you bend down. A hand finds his hair, petting over him as he finishes catching his breath. He really never stood a chance. “You wanna know your punishment?”

He groans, “Just tell me.”

“You.. my handsome thing..” You start, kissing his temple which pulls a small hum from him, “have to sit over there and watch Brendan fuck me. And you can’t touch yourself.” The declaration makes him whine a bit, looking up at you.

“Really?

“Really.”

“Sounds pretty fuckin’ nice to me.” Brendan finally chimes in, now fully naked.

“Well– obviously!” Walker retorts, throwing a glare back at the Irishman. He cackles in response and spanks Simon once, making him yelp.

“Shut up and get in the chair.” Even though he doesn’t want to, he listens, reluctantly getting to his feet and moving to where you previously sat. He sits with a groan, half hard, never having fully softened. Cum coats his cock, sticky and smeared along the length as he lays his arms on the armrests of the chair.

“I really can’t touch myself, at all?” Walker complains softly, trying a pouty look.

“Not one finger.” You confirm, grinning as you lay back on your bed, thighs parting to invite Brendan between them. He wastes no time at all, crawling overtop you to kiss you deeply as he grinds his cock against you. The sensation makes you moan, getting lost in his kiss for a moment and looping your arms around his neck. One of Brendan’s fingers circle your clit, slow, deliberate, before dipping to feel how soaked you are. The feeling pulls a groan from his chest.

“Fuck Simon, she’s drippin’, y’like watchin’ us that much?”

A giggle fills the air, bubbling up your throat as you nod, “Yeah, you two listen to me really well.”

“Oh shut up,” The Irishman laughs, sliding into you in one slow motion. It makes both of you groan, and Simon whine, forced to just watch. He squirms a bit as Brendan starts to roll his hips into you deeply, a different movement than how he fucked Simon. It stutters a moan out of you, your back arching and you tilt your head back whilst Brendan’s lips cover your neck, “Fuck, there y’go..”

He grinds slow, deep, just how you like it and his cock reaches so deep, just bordering on painful, “Oh my God, fuck Brendan,” it leaves your lips as a whine, hands grabbing at his biceps with nails pushing into his skin.

Simon squirms a bit in his seat, cock aching now, and he digs his fingers against the armrests so as to not touch himself. His face feels flushed because of him watching you two, watching how Brendan’s hands push at your shoulder and thigh, his tongue licks up your neck hotly, nipping at your jaw before kissing you again. Arousal swirls in his gut, making him whine softly.

The noise makes you detach from the kiss and turn your head, whilst Brendan buries his face into your neck and kisses to resist the urge to cum already, “What, love? Feeling neglected?” You grin.

“Can’t I–“

“No.”

“Mmm c’mon–“

“No.”

“Fuck you.”

“That’s not– ah! not nice Simon.” The insult only brings a breathy laugh to your lips, and then Brendan pipes in with a groan.

“I’m putting you over my lap when I’m done with her.”

“Are not!”

“Yes he is, oh fuck–“ Your agreement tapers off into a whine, thighs squeezing Brendans waist, “Right there, please.” He obliges easily, anything you ask, a couple fingers skillfully rubbing your clit in circles, with just the right pressure to send your legs trembling and a warning on your lips, “Bren– I’m gonna–“

“Go on, cum on me.” The Irishman groans, sucking at your pulse point. The action sends you over the edge, legs tightening around him and spasming as you cum, hard, the sensation rolls through you with gasping moans, both men practically whining at the sight as Brendan cums as well. Panting fills the room, only interrupted by the quiet whiny noises Simon makes. Your head tilts, giving a tired grin at Simon, before turning to the one atop you,

“So, I get to watch you spank him right?”

————————♡

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Simon weeps, face flushed with tears wetting his cheeks, bent over Brendan’s naked thighs and practically falling off with how much his legs kick.

“Shoulda thought before you ran your fucking– “ Brendan’s hand tangles into the others hair, yanking his head up and pulling a cry from the other, “mouth. Apologize again.”

“I’m sorry!” He squeals, the Irishman’s ringed hand coming down on his ass again, the pain making his ears ring and his heart pound.

All the while you watch with a laugh bubbling up in your throat.

[onskepa]

So i've seen this edit about quaritch and spider with that song "oh i love it and hate it at the same time, you and i drinking poison from the same vine" and just image it; reader who has an avatar and neteyam as her mate and she told everybody that her was mom was na'vi and her dad was an avatar. When lo'ak and neteyam went to save spider they see reader in her human form and she thinks neteyam is dissapointed in her. Her avatar dies and she has to live with neteyam in her human form. The reader thinks he hates her or smtg. I thank you very much if you could write my ideea or just react <3

Hello sweetie! Thanks for requesting this. I hope you don't mind if I switched things around a bit. also I tried my best to add some angst, Idk if I did a good job, however! Hope you all enjoy!

pt2

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Law'si

Trust, honesty, and loyalty. Those are the three main keys in a relationship, be is family, lover, friendship, kinship, it doesn't matter. Those three play a key role. The three main core. Everything.

Law'si is a kind girl, who would give anything for those she loves dearly. Especially her mate neteyam. She wonders sometimes what did she do for Eywa to unite her with neteyam. The love of her life, her sweet and kind mate. He is all and more.

Which is why at times, the guilt burns her, it is like having acid climb up your throat and cant keep it down. The lies she has told all to not just her mate, but to everyone.

She isn't a half-bred like neteyam and his siblings. Law'si is a avatar, a dream walker. She never united her soul with her na'vi body. Telling everyone that her mother was na'vi and her father was a avatar. Much like jake and neytiri. That way no one would question her much less her background.

For a long time it worked, no one suspected anything. It was fine, no signs of suspicions, no lies detected, her life was fine. Everything is fine.

Until it wasn't anymore.

the RDA came back, stronger and more cruel. Weapons of mass destruction to attack and kill the peaceful tulkun. And to make matters worse, the very demon who destroyed many na'vi lives has come back in a na'vi body himself. A true demon in the flesh.

Of only that demon didnt come back, none of this mess would have happened...

"please!! we have to get spider!" lo'ak begged neteyam and law'si to help him rescue spider. Law'si had a bad feeling, she knew something wasnt going to end up right.

Oh how she hated that she was right.

"NO!!" quickly and swiftly she pushed neteyam down to the waters, letting one of the metal bullets pierce her shoulder, letting her fall down into the cold waters.

Neteyam cheers at the success but was cut too short, he sees his mate struggling to keep her head up for air.

"I've been shot....!!" she says weakly. Neteyam began to panic, seeing her blood flow in the water, dying it red. A rush of adrenaline coursed through his body. Quickly getting her to a ilu tsrieya brought with her, quickly mounting on it with tsireya, lo'ak and spider holding tight.

"its going to be ok yawne! you're going to be ok!!" he tries to reassure law'si, but really, he was reassuring more himself. Taking her to the flat rocks, neteyam gently places her down and trying to inspect the wound. Tsireya looked into it as well, in her training, she knew law'si wasn't going to make it.

Neteyam applied pressure to the wound as means to stop the bleeding, but the flow never stopped. His blue hands now covered in her blood. Cold fear runs down his back.

"n-net..." law'si tries to speak. Her breathing short and heavy, trying to keep herself awake. Neytiri and jake arrived to see the horrifying scene before them.

"h-home..!!" she continues to try speaking out, trying to make sense for neteyam. "w-we're going home yawne...!" his voice cracks, trying his bet to be composed but was failing miserably.

Neytiri was crying as well, she did not wish to see her son witness his mates death. No one should ever. Neytiri gently strokes law'si head, whispering reassuring words into her ears.

"we're going home....!! y-you will be fine..!! its going to be ok!!" neteyam says more, stroking her beloveds face. "nete I am...." her pupils dilate, her last breathe leaving her body and her limbs limp.

"law'si? no no no..!! LAW'SI!!" neteyam screams his heart out, shaking furiously. Holding her limp body, his tears flow none stop. Jake tries to pull him away from the body but neteyam kept a firm grip on his mate. Praying to great mother to bring back his love, his life, his everything. No matter his loud he screams, he begs, neteyam isn't going to see his beloved again.

Or so he thought.

A week has past since the great battle. A week since neteyam lost his beloved. A week since her funeral. A week of misery. Everyone tried to help neteyam, ease his mourning. He didn't eat as much, slept as much, never smiled again. His family, his friends, they all tried, really. But there really isn't nothing to help him, poor boy lost his mate. A wound that would take years to heal, if it ever does.

That is, until one day, norm came in his avatar form, and he wasn't alone. He brought someone with him, someone unfamiliar yet familiar.

"neteyam, someone wants to see you. It is really important that you se her.." norm talks to him, face to face. Neteyam wasn't really in the mood to see anyone. Only tracing the beads of his beloved's songchord. The only thing he was able to keep after her burial.

"not now norm" he mutters. Still able to hear him though. Norm nods a bit.

"but at least hear me out-"

"what part of not now don't you understand?!" neteyam lashes out. He is tired, and just wants to be in his own thoughts.

"not now? or not ever?"

Neteyam froze. He knows that voice. That sweet kind voice he missed so much.

Standing at the entrance of his home stood a human girl. If her not wearing a mask didn't surprise him, it was those familiar eyes. Those human eyes held the same love, the same warmth and comfort his mate once had.

"w-who are you...?" neteyam asks in a whisper like tone. The girl smiles nervously as she rubs her hands together.

"law'si"

Neteyam stood up so quick it catches both norm and law'si by surprised. In mere seconds, neteyam was already up and front with law'si. Examining her very carefully, taking in all the details the human has before him. The eyes were the same, her lips, her smile, even the way she is standing!

"it really is you...but how?! I saw you die....!!" tears were gathering at the corner of his eyes, ready to cry once more. Law'si beat him to it. As she began to cry.

"I was scared to tell you! I was never a half-bred like you, I was a dream walker this whole time. I didn't know how to tell you so I lied. I lied and it led you to believe I died. I am so so sorry neteyam. I shouldn't have put you through that!!" she hugs him as tightly as she could while crying her soul out.

Neteyam was processing what was revealed, before gently wrapping his big arms around her. Taking in her scent, she smelled the same as always. Fresh grass and flowery aroma.

"its ok, its ok yawne. It's still you, I am so happy you're alright. Im so happy!!" he cries soon after. Both hugging tightly and never wanting to let go.

The way neteyam sees it, he is eternally grateful to have his mate back with him. May not be the same but it will work. She is still the same lovable girl who stole his heart. And nothing will change that. Be it na'vi or human. Neteyam doesn't care. Law'si is still law'si.

And that is all for this request! I hope you all enjoyed it! until next time! see ya!

Law'si = make clear, clarify

[lululawrence]

lululawrence's March 2023 Fic List

Previous Fic Lists / Lulu’s List Podcast Masterpost

Happy 28th! I finally finished with reading Christmas, so the last batch of those are found here as well as a fun variety of other fics that kept me well entertained this month and hope you'll enjoy them too.

As always, be sure to show your love and appreciation with kudos, nice comments, and (when applicable) reblogging their fic posts!

it always leads to you (in my hometown) by @insightfulinsomniac / InsightfulInsomniac (41k, E, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, exes to lovers, famous/non-famous, childhood friends to lovers to exes to strangers to lovers, if you want the whole rundown, though not all of it is shown in this fic lol, pining, angst and fluff, this fic was so enjoyable i devoured it and enjoyed every moment, the way they both wanted it so bad and tried so hard to get over each other, it was just so pure and good you know?, i really did enjoy it very much a lot)

A Boyfriend for Christmas by @chelsea-frew / Chelsea Frew (chelseafrew) (6k, G, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, fake relationship, fluff and humor, Louis agrees to help Gemma by pretending to be her boyfriend to keep her family off her back, but then he meets Harry and lmao the STRUGGLE to hide the gay is hilarious I loved it so much, he was trying so hard, and Harry was so conflicted, but it all turned out alright and it's just such a cute fic)

Worries, Kisses and Surprises by @neondiamond / Neondiamond (3k, G, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, established relationship, fluff, mpreg, this short little thing is so funny because Harry is trying so hard to keep it together and not let things slip, and Louis is just really pushing it and not picking up on the clues, and it's just so funny and cute, very sweet)

santa, won't you bring me the one i really need? by @alwaysxlarrie / alwaysxlarrie (6k, T, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, meet cute, Louis is a last minute sub for a mall Santa, and Harry is the last minute sub as his helper elf, so many puns, so much flirting, so many horrible children and parents lmaoooo, this fic was silly and painful and cute and fun, just like a real mall santa gig lol)

when did i first know? i always knew by @panye / eynap (8k, E, Niall/Shawn, Christmas fic, established relationship, I would summarize this fic as anxiety and fluff lolololol, punctuated by some hot smut, it's Shawn's POV and you can FEEL his anxiety as he's starting to worry that he is SO in love and Niall.... is not, but oh gosh it's so perfect really it is, so sweet)

when I'm feeling alone, you remind me of home by pinkbathrrry (14k, NR, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, co-workers, strangers to lovers, closeted in the workplace, Christmas together, listen this fic was so soft, it had a really lovely pacing to it that made it feel like it was gently lilting like a poem or a song, with these sweet little ending statements to scenes, it was just such a soft little Christmas fic)

The Hour of Us by @niallziam / sitandadmire (6k, M, Niall/Harry/Louis, Reverse Bang fic, girl direction, polyamory, established relationship, magic, witches, cottagecore, this fic was unbelievably soft and sweet, and so silly, the scene with the frog was so funny omgosh, but it's just so sweet even with the slight feeling of things going wrong you just know it's going to turn out perfectly, you know?, anyway, this was so sweet)

bitter ends turn sweet in time by @greeneyesfriedrice / me_her_themoon (24k, E, Harry/Louis, Christmas fic, childhood friends to ex-friends to coworkers to lovers, miscommunication, homeless Harry, boss Louis, assistant Harry, dog walker/kind of personal assistant/bestie Zayn, this fic was so lovely, it was so interesting piecing together their background and trying to figure out what went wrong, and the PINING oh my word it was fantastic, so good, this fic was so goooood, when they finally come together and figure out what's going on with them and fixing what went wrong it just, chef's kiss, so good)

Let Your Heart Be Light by @cyantific / Cyantific (78k, E, Harry/Louis, Advent fic, Christmas fic, grieving, strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers, kind of, lol, pining, more grieving, and grief, and love and sadness and the holidays being incredibly difficult because, you guessed it, grief!, this fic isn't a happy go lucky one, it handles a lot of difficult subjects and these characters have a hard time with it all, i cried a lot reading it, but it is so perfectly and beautifully done, it is incredible and such a beautiful fic, the journey the characters all take together, and the camaraderie between all of the friends, it is such a great read, i loved reading it as a wip and cannot believe i forgot the last chapters posted for as along as i did lol)

Teach me how to love by perfectdagger (sincerelyste) (71k, E, Harry/Louis, Bad As Sex AU, Harry is bad at sex, like SO bad at sex lolllllll, it's kind of like, one night stand to enemies to friends with benefits to lovers, but only kind of because enemies isn't quite right and neither is friends with benefits, but it's as close as it gets i guess, anyway there's so much more to this, but it's so much vulnerability, and so much exploration and growth and just, this fic was exactly my shit okay it was so good, i don't even know how to fully explain what made it so special but it really was so good, the smut was sexy as hell and the chemistry between the two of them leapt from the page and it was just, incredible, a truly stunning fic from start to finish)

Late Night Talking by @kingsofeverything / kingsofeverything (54k, E, Harry/Louis, Reverse Bang fic, famous/famous, Harry is essentially Jimmy Kimmel, and Louis is... himself except he'd always been a punk rocker basically?, holy COW y'all, the PINING, the angst, the longing!!!!, you know i'm a hoe for those things so it was just everything i love, this fic i just inhaled it, like so many others this month tbh, it was an absolute joy to read it, so many incredible moments, just, yes, so good lol)

Slide by @this-onegoes / thisonegoes (88k, E, Zayn/Harry, I'm trying to figure out how to summarize this fic lol because it is SO MUCH and doesn't really fit smoothly into any trope exactly, divorced Zayn, father Zayn, music producer Harry, neighbors, sexuality crisis, emotional hurt/comfort, SO much hurt/comfort, puzzles, kid fic, navigating life changes, daddy issues, angst, pain, happy ending, the best happiest ending, i just loved this fic so much, i dove right in and could not handle how incredible it was, if you read rare pairs ever you have to give this a try because it is just stunningly amazing, and the women in it are fabulous, and just wowowowowow, i have no idea how i just discovered this fic now but thank you to @louandhazaf for reccing it because it's a new fav)

[frangipanilove]

Fighting Fire With Fire Part Three:

Pharmakon And The LK8-4167 Licence Plate

(read parts one and two here)

This really has been the season of licence plates for me. I’ve written about the resurrection symbolism around the XH6-S781 and the LC6M187 licence plates. Today I want to expand on the licence plate LK8-4167 that we first saw in 5x10 WHAWGO. A brilliant Bethyler back in the ancient times of Early Team Delusional discovered that it could potentially refer to the Bible verse Luke 8, which happend to tell a story of resurrection (If anyone remembers the name of the person who discovered this, let me know so I can give them proper credit).

Then, when 6x10 A New World rolled around, we saw the same licence plate again, which I wrote about in this post from a few weeks ago.

There’s actually a third car with this particular license plate. It appears in 6x6 Always Accountable, and the scene and episode in which it appears is full of resurrection symbolism. Let’s dive in!

I first wrote about the LK8-4167 license plate in this post from 2020. It’s old and somewhat dated, but it’s also fairly thorough, check it out for the basics of the three/tree/trunk symbolism.

The licence plate first came on to TD’s radar after 5x9 WHAWGO. Obviously, 5x9 was the first episode after Beth had been shot at Grady, and it was also the last episode Beth appeared in, as she appeared in Tyreese’s fever dream before he died.

WHAWGO was an episode where the audience needed to pay attention. One can argue that TPTB intentionally tried to trick the audience from the get-go, for starters, it opened with someone digging a grave. Everyone assumed it was Beth’s grave, as her “death” had been the last thing we saw in the episode prior. Then came the plot twist, when it turned out to be Tyreese’s grave. We still don’t know if/where/when/how Beth was buried, we learned from Talking Dead that 17 days had passed between 5x8 Coda and 5x9 WHAWGO, but we know nothing of what transpired in those days.

The lack of a funeral for Beth, and an outright fake “trick” funeral intended to lure us into believing she had been buried has emerged as one of the most pressing unanswered questions for Team Delusional. Was she buried? If so, where? When? And if not, why?

Glenn explained the rules back in season one: "We bury the ones we love, and burn the rest". Through the years we've seen an enormous focus on getting people, and at times animals like goats and sometimes even baseball bats, a proper burial.

But not Beth. Why not? TD has questions.

As the group struggled to save Tyreese in WHAWGO, we could hear Beth’s voice singing Struggling Man in the backround. We watch them reach the cluster of cars where they were parked, and we see this female walker in a car. Interstingly, we see this scene paralleled in 6X6 Always Accountable, where a walker was trapped in a car in a similar way:

And while we hear Beth/Emily singing Struggling Man in the background, we see Rick deliver this line, which is a callback to when Beth sang the Tom Waits classic "Hold On" at the prison back in season 3:

There’s something strange about how they all reacted with fear and horror to the cluster of cars, it's as though something had happened that inflicted some kind of shared trauma associated with walkers in cars on them.

We also saw that in the next episode 5x10 Them, where they came across a different cluster of cars along the road, and reacted as though it was the most frightful sight ever. It was in one of these cars Maggie found the blond, tied up walker, a walker that has been confirmed to be meant as a reference to Beth, in a scene that seemed to haunt Maggie to an almost unreasonable degree.

It doesn't quite add up. They were all seasoned survivers at this point, they had all seen, and neutralized, countless walkers. What was it about the walkers trapped in cars from WHAWGO and Them that stood out to them as particularly terrifying and traumatizing?

This could be a reference to another cornerstone TD belief. Had Beth been left in a car during a walker attack directly after the events of 5x8 Coda? Is that why she was so heavily surreounded by trunk symbolism? Was it foreshadowing?

And as they desperately tried to get their car unstuck from the mud, we saw the red vehicle with the LK8-4167 license plate.

When we seek out the corresponding verse in the Bible, we find a story about healing a girl and a resurrection. We’ve heard Beth’s voice singing Struggling Man up until this very moment.

"She is not dead but asleep".

However you might feel about it, it's hard to deny that the licence plate could refer to resurrection. And it's difficult to argue it was about Tyreese. We saw Tyreese get stabbed through the brain to prevent him from reanimating. And we saw him get buried. The symbolism was not about him.

It is much more likely that it was about the girl whose voice we heard in the background the whole time, the girl we never saw put down or buried, the girl who was also last seen in 5x9 WHAWGO. It’s more likely that it was about the girl who's been surrounded by all kinds of resurrection symbolism, and who's been closely paralleled with Rick, someone who now has died and resurrected twice.

The fact that there were human torsos (or simply "trunks") stored in the car is three/tree/trunk symbolism, which I’ve talked about elsewhere (such as here and here), and I won’t discuss that in this post.

But let's now return to the licence plate we saw in 6x6 Always Accountable. It's an interesting episode for many reasons, and it's also an episode in which we learn more on how TWDU uses the concept of "fighting fire with fire".

As Daryl, Sasha and Abraham finish operation Lead The Walkers Away, and are about to return home to Alexandria, they are suddenly attacked. As they speed up to outrun the gunfire, the become separated from each other. And it is during this car chase we see the third LK8-4167 licence plate:

Daryl takes a tumble right next to a Jeep Cherokee. I went into great detail on the resurrection symbolism around that, and how Jeep Cherokees and Cherokee Roses are synonymous, here.

He falls off his bike, injures his elbow but quickly gets back up on the horse. I'm not going to overstate the symbolism of that small detail, but it does constitute a representation of falling down (death) and getting back up (resurrection). On it's own it's merely a fun fact, rather than some super compelling evidence of resurrection symbolism, however it does fall in line with everything else we see, so I'll allow it. Let's agree it indicates resurrection symbolism at the very least. And it happened directly after we had seen the LK8-4167 license plate, that we now know represent resurrection.

Also, we did see a Jeep Cherokee at the end of 5x8 Coda, as Daryl carried Beth's seemingly lifeless body out of Grady Memorial, it's in the bottom left corner in this pic:

Keep the Jeep Cherokee in mind, because we'll return to it shortly.

Every Bethyler watching instantly knew that 6x6 Always Accoutable would be a treasure trove of Bethyl-coded symbolism the minute we saw this shot from after Daryl’s bike broke down:

He immediately tries to establish contact with Sasha and Abraham, but they’re out of radio reach. When they don’t respond he goes out in search of them.

He soon gets into trouble when Dwight, Sherry and Tina finds him and mistakes him for one of Negan’s Saviors. They tie him up and take him through a burnt forest that used to be their home, before it was overrun with walkers.

This is a good time to once again reflect on the meaning of pharmakon, a poison and a cure. Fighting fire with fire.

As they walk through the burnt forest, we get subtle clues pertaining to the fire symbolism through the dialogue:

Dwight and Sherry explains how they flooded the area with fuel, lit up a matchbook from the Sweetwater Beer Company, then the walkers "just walked right into the flames”.

Notice how Dwight and Sherry here reveal something crucial about how the wildfire virus affects the walkers? Walkers, meaning wandering undead corpses having succumbed to the wildfire virus, are hardwired to walk right into fire!

They are drawn to flames! This is quite iterally fighting wildfire with fire.

Then, it’s also important to note that the reference to "the Sweetwater" is a reference to the beer bottle in which Daryl placed a Cherokee Rose and gave to Carol in 2x4 Cherokee rose. Sweetwater is a brand of beer. The beer bottle he used was one from Sweetwater. And as I’ve explained here, ethanol/beer is the key to the cure, the antidote, the pharmakon.

And as we remember from season 3, Daryl placed a Cherokee Rose on Carol's empty grave, marking it as a scene for a future "resurrection", symbolism which was fulfilled when she was found alive in the tombs of the prison a few episodes later.

Daryl is eventually able to break free from Dwight and Sherry, and as he escapes into the woods, we see a walker with a Cherokee Rose on its back:

Again, this is the first Cherokee Rose we've seen since season 3, it's quite a significant moment, symbolism wise, because it's all about resurrection.

Then we turn our attention to Abraham and Sasha. They eventually end up near the same Jeep Cherokee, where they have a conversation about being left behind and having someone return for them. Again, TD has discussed these themes for years in relation to Beth and those 17 days post-Coda.

Many of us believe Beth was left behind in Atlanta, for reasons we don’t yet know. It’s significant that Abe and Sasha talk about these themes about being left behind and someone coming back next to the Jeep Cherokee.

This plays into the widely held TD belief that whatever it was that happened after Coda, it somehow involved getting overwhelmed by walkers, then placing Beth in the trunk of a car (foreshadowed in Still and Them), with every intention of returning to her, but then for some reason being prevented from doing so. And when they eventually did, perhaps she was "just gone".

Back to Daryl for a minute. Being who he is, he tries to make allies and friends out of Dwight and Sherry. This backfires on him as they betray him and steal his bike and his crossbow.

But Daryl is resourceful, and manages to find a truck full of fuel hidden under some greenery:

Please note the licence plate, PATTY002, on a truck labeled 002. I've discussed these numbers in countless other posts, so I won't elaborate on it here. However, it needs to be mentioned, because the symbolism around the 22/Morningstar/Lightbringer comes into play in a big way.

I'll just briefly mention that we could easily draw on the "one one" of Noah's t-shirt, we could interpret the 2 as in roman numerals II, which could also be read as the number 11, which again could be a reference to TWD 10x11 Morningstar.

We could also interpret the two 2's as the number 22, which I've written extencively about. Again it is a Morningstar reference, and it highlights the duality that we see around "pharmakon", in that both Christ and the Devil has been referred to as the Morningstar. Lucifer Morningstar. Lucifer means Lightbringer. The Devil and Christ. A poison and a cure. Fighting fire with fire.

Obviously, Sirius and Venus are both morning stars, in that they appear in the morning (and for the record, Venus is a planet, but was initially percieved to be two wandering stars, one that appeared at evening time and one that appeared in the morning)

And all of that suddenly comes into play, when Abraham finds a yellow Humvee with some serious rocket launchers, or should I say “light-bringers”, included.

And it's a good thing he did, because in 6x8 No Way Out, on their way home to Alexandria Safe Zone, they run into this group of unsavory characters; Negan's Saviors.

The Saviors demonstrate an atrocious lack of manners, and Daryl eventually teaches them a lesson, using one of Abraham's rocket launchers.

The symbolism here is interesting. The rocket launchers came from a yellow Humvee, something which brings our minds to the other yellow vehickles that's encompassed by the "yellow" symbolism. I wrote about it here.

And Daryl reached for one from the back of the 002 Patty002 fuel truck, which could be interpreted as part of the "one one" Morningstar symbolism, as well as the 22 Morningstar/Lightbringer symbolism.

But we learn more about how it relates to the pharmakon/fighting fire with fire symbolism once they reach Alexandria:

Alexandria Safe Zone, now completely overrun by a massive walker horde, is losing the battle against death. The undead outnumber and outcompete the living.

But Daryl has learned something from his encounter with Dwight and Sherry. He now knows that the walkers are drawn to flames, that the wildfire virus is attracted to fire. He arranges for the fuel to be poured into the lake, and then fires a rocket into it. The lake blows up in an inferno of flames, and as anticipated, the walkers walk right into the fire. Fire destructs the wildfire virus. Fighting fire with fire.

And above all, it’s very poignant Lightbringer/Morningstar symbolism. Daryl’s rocket launcher literally lights up the place.

The LK8-4167 licence plate is about resurrection. And resurrection in TWDU is associated with fire. We've seen that through the Sirius symbolism throughout the seasons. The Sirius symbolism revolves around Sirius The Dog Star, which returns to the sky one morning right before dawn, after having been gone for some time. Beth became inextricably linked with the Sirius symbolism after 4x13 Alone. The word "Sirius" comes from Greek "Seirios" and means "glowing, scorching.

Sirius The Dog Star returns one morning right before dawn... or shall we say sunrise?

An interesting detail is that while Daryl is out in the burnt forest with Dwight and Sherry, Sasha and Abraham seek temporary refuge inside the offices of a car insurance company called Sunrise Auto Insurance.

Remember Operation Cobalt, which included the decision to try to contain the spread of the wildfire virus by dropping napalm bombs on metropolitan areas all over the North American continent, likely killing hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of civilians. An alternative name for Operation Cobalt was the Sunset Protocol:

If "sunset" represents the end of humanity due to the wildfire virus itself, in addition to the use of napalm on civilians, through Operation Cobalt and the sunset protocols... could "sunrise" represent the opposite? A cure or an antidote. Pharmakon?

Both "sunrise" and "sunset" describes actions of the sun, which is a literal burning ball of gas. Fighting fire with fire.

And of course, there's this scene, in which we saw a "resurrection" of sorts, when the music box "came back to life" during a beautiful sunset after a particularly stormy night:

Sunrise heralds resurrection. Literally and metaphorically speaking.

Finally, a few words on things to potentially be exited about going foreward. In the TWD World Beyond coda, it was more than implied that the origin of the wildfire virus came out of a French lab. The grafitti on the wall translates to "the dead were born here".

We now also know that the French created variant walkers, specifically designed to function as weapons. In TWDDD 1x12 L'ame Perdue, we saw Daryl cross paths with one of these variants called les brûlant, burners, due to their blood that burn like acid when it comes into contact with human skin.

We saw Daryl suffer a bad burn, and we saw how he was later treated with cauterization, a technique that involves burning the affected area with a red hot iron. The "cure" hides in plain sight; fighting fire with fire.

Isabel explains that cauterization is they best way to prevent burns from les brûlant from spreading. It's a small scene, but it is one of the first things we learn about how the virus has affected France, and more importantly, it is confirmation that the symbolism is the same across TWDU: fighting fire with fire. A burn from a burner/brûlant is healed with cauterization, fire... Again, we see fire as pharmakon, a poison and a cure.

@bookqueenrules recently made me aware of a yellow car that's been involved in filming of what appears to be large parts of season 2. I wonder if it could possibly be a Jeep Wrangler. That would be an interesting reference to the symbolism around Carol's Jeep Cherokee from season 1, and it ties in nicely with all the other yellow vehicles we've come across that has serious resurrection undertones to them.

Having said that, I'm no car expert, and it could easily be something else entirely, time will tell. But it is yellow, that's for sure, and therefore it's part of the yellow vehicle symbolism, Jeep or not.

(ETA: I think it might be a Land Rover, now that I’m looking at it. But like I said, I’m not an expert, it could be anything really)

These symbols, the fire symbolism, the yellow symbolism and the Jeep Cherokee/Cherokee Rose symbolism, they intersect in really powerful ways, and I'm super exited to see how this all continues in TWDDD season 2, The Book Of Carol. And the concept of pharmakon, a poison and a cure, exists on both sides of the Atlantic.

[burningdarkfire]

here's a longer version of my immediate post-arcane thoughts now that i've been turning it over in my head for a day

i thiiink it does just feel like we abandoned the first 12-ish episodes to hit the last 6 tho. i feel like the first season + s2 act 1 gives us a pretty good view of all of these characters who are at odds with each other because they have their own goals, desires, strengths, weaknesses, and they are informed by their own socioeconomic contexts, and that was genuinely really good! we got to see these characters pushed to the brink of what they could tolerate, forced to question their ideals and their beliefs, clash with others they could not understand..

and there is this very clear running theme that asks what are you willing to do for love? and what are you willing to do in the name of grief?

and then all that was largely just set aside because there was a universe-ending threat lol so we just needed to all band together, socioeconomic contexts be damned, personals goals/desires/etc. shoved to the side because hey the universe is in danger of ending!!

it's not like that's inherently a bad story at the highest level (most obvious example: game of thrones is about. the game of thrones. in contrast with the existential threat of the white walkers) but it just did not feel set up to succeed from the beginning when we got 12 episodes of this character work that felt personal and interesting and important. it's not like we watched the first 12 episodes with mounting horror that they were fighting their petty squabbles while ignoring the obvious existential threat in the background!! we were fully invested in these characters and their personal struggles in the existing systems!! and then it just didn't really matter

like idek what to think about vi's ending really - she still loses everybody except cait (and ig ekko, though it doesn't seem like they have that much to do with each other at this point) and i just don't really understand what was supposed to have shifted in her character that she is just okay with that? what am i supposed to imagine as her life from now on? like is she just going to continue being an enforcer and live with cait?? does that not seem kind of wild???

okay but also obviously i have mixed feelings though because the fact that jayce and viktor were truly the beginning and end of everything had me bawling in the middle of the afternoon fr so i do have to give them some credit for that. all things considered if they were going to do this sort of thing anyway then at least they did it this way lmao

[stargazing-sapphire2]

Helena Rorke

Full Name: Helena Annabelle Rorke

Date of Birth: August 19th, 1976. Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Date of Death: May 4th, 2011. Unknown location, South America

Nationality: American

Occupation: United States Air Force / Task Force STALKER

Rank: First Lieutenant

Age: 35 years old (At time of death)

Family / Relatives:

-Samuel Rorke - Father (Deceased)

-Marie Henrikson - Mother (Deceased)

-Gabriel Rorke - Older brother (Alive)

-Henry Ashford - Husband (Alive)

-Elizabeth and Evangeline Ashford - Daughters (Alive)

-Elias Walker II - Grandson (Alive)

Appearance:

*Hair color: Blonde

*Eye color: Blue

*Height: 5'3 / 160 cm

*Scars / Beauty marks / Blemishes: Helena's nose is slightly crooked due to an injury that never healed properly; a small gap in her front teeth

*Faceclaim: Blake Lively

Personality:

On a personal level, Helena is a lighthearted and jokester, as a way to keep spirits and morale up in tough times. Although she can be quite stubborn and rather prideful about her skills (a quality Beth would inherit from her), she seldom ever brags unless she has a reason to, and is content to simply just do her job.

On a professional level, Helena is every bit stoic and harsh, completely locking in whenever the situation calls for it. She prioritizes completing the mission, while minimizing casualties as much as she can.

Due to this aspect of her, Helena was nicknamed "Helly" as a silly little play-on version of the shortened word "heli" from helicopter, although this was an endearing nickname from Henry.

Background:

Helena was born on August 19th, 1976, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Samuel Rorke and Marie Henrikson; she was their second child, two years after their son Gabriel. Marie worked as a schoolteacher, while Samuel was a retired Army veteran.

Helena and Gabriel's childhood was not glamorous; the family struggled financially, and Samuel, having fought in the Vietnam War some years earlier, was a raging alcoholic who frequently abused his wife and children, with Marie doing everything she could to shield her children from his violence. When Helena was ten years old, Marie was diagnosed with a terminal illness, and died within a few months of receiving the news. This led to the two siblings to have take odd jobs in their teenage years in order to support themselves and get by, as Samuel continued to drink and gamble away their money.

At the age of 18, Gabriel would eventually leave the house and enlist in the Marine Corps straight out of high school. Two years later, Helena would follow after him, although she signed onto the Air Force.

Helena would eventually meet a friend of Gabriel and Elias's, Henry Ashford. The two gradually formed a bond over time and fell in love; they got married in 1998, and a year later, they had twin girls, Elizabeth and Evangeline, in 1999.

In 2005, Helena would participate in Operation: Sand Viper in the ongoing Tel Aviv War. Due to her skills in managing aircraft, she assisted in saving lives by airlifting wounded soldiers and civilians out of the hospital. When all came to a standstill, this would mark the formation of the Ghosts, and due to her role, Helena would be the designated pilot of the task force, something she carried with pride.

In 2011, sometime after the formation of the Federation, while pursuing high ranking officials, Helena and a small squadron were ambushed, their helicopter being shot out of the sky and crashing in the Amazon Rainforest. The crash was fatal, and all those in the helicopter perished on impact. Helena's body would never be recovered, nor given a proper burial of a Ghost.

With her passing left her family and comrades in devastation. Henry would never remarry and remained a widower, and shifted his focus to raising their daughters. Her death would haunt the small family in the years to come, with Beth and Eva enlisting after the ODIN strikes to honor their mother's memory.

[merrock]

CHARACTER INFORMATION

face claim: Chloe Bennet

full name: Monique O'Connor

nickname(s) / goes by: Mon, Moni

pronouns & gender: cis woman, she/her

sexuality: bi-curious

birth date: February 28th 1991

birth place: San Francisco, CA

arrival to merrock: August 2024

housing: Lupine Lane

occupation: Freelance musician

work place: n/a

family: Freya O'Connor (daughter), In-laws (tbc).

relationship status: Widowed

PERSONALITY

Monique thrives on spontaneity and loves to go with the flow. While she doesn’t particularly like being pushed to do things before she’s ready, when she eventually is Moni is prepared to give it her all. A highly creative individual, she tends to spend any spare time playing around with music; being particularly fond of singing, acoustic guitar and the keys. Compassionate and loving, Monique is emotionally intelligent and uses this to her advantage, though it often leaves her susceptible to putting her own needs on the back burner. Losing her husband was an earth shattering experience for Moni, but she’s trying to move forward. That being said, she’s not looking for love. Lucas had been the love of her life; her epic love. She doesn’t believe that she’s capable of moving on from him, and she doesn’t want to. She’s just looking for a place to call their new home, to escape city life.

WRITTEN BY: Tash (she/her), GMT+10.

BACKGROUND / BIO

triggering / sensitive topic warning: death, police mention

Born San Franciscan, Monique O’Connor (maiden name Walker) has always been a free spirit. Even before she was born, she was enamoured by music. It was revealed exactly how much as she grew, always leaning towards noisy and musical toys, performing and singing along to her favourite tunes. While she wasn’t particularly popular growing up, she was well versed with a variety of cliques, finding a way to communicate on different levels as required. School just didn’t seem like it was her forte. She was average, at best. After graduating Monique was her strongest advocate, doing open mic nights and trying to get gigs at venues throughout the city. She'd handed out CD’s with her music burned onto them, and even willed herself to do some mini performances to prove that, yes, it was actually her singing. Successfully managing to get a regular spot after a few uncertainties, Moni began to flourish. It had been her third gig at the time when she met Lucas. He had approached her after she'd completed her set rather boldly, talked with her, bought her a drink. He was kind, charming, a little dorky -- maybe a bit too polite -- though when he told her he was fresh out of the academy and was out celebrating his first official assignment, it all started to make sense.

Over the next several months, Monique was increasingly taken by him, falling slowly but surely. While it wasn't easy in the beginning, they managed to make it work thanks to open communication and trust. Where she was willing to bend the rules, he lived by them. While she flowed with the current, he fought against it. While some may have struggled with the dynamic, they evened each other out. Falling pregnant shortly after their first year together, Lucas promised his love and devotion to her and their pending child. This led to his proposal, her acceptance, and them marrying intimately with their closest family and friends. It had been a smooth pregnancy, luckily not having to deal with any complications throughout, and they eventually welcomed a beautiful baby girl into the world — Freya O’Connor was born directly into her fathers arms on May 8th, 2015. They became the picture perfect family. Respected, sociable, involved in the community. While her husband advanced in his career, Monique remained the charismatic housewife, mother, and self-titled musician she'd grew to be over the years. Though every wife’s nightmare came true November 16th, 2022 when she had officers knock on her door and offering their condolences. Lucas had been killed on duty in the midst of raiding a drug den. Her world crumbled around her, but Monique knew that she had to keep going for their daughters sake. She had to be strong, and ride the wave.

Navigating single parenthood wasn’t easy, but she managed with the help of her in-laws, much to her discontent. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate and love them, it was just their presence without Lucas didn't feel right. As much as she loved him and would continue to do so, she found it hard living in the same space, the same town, without him. Deciding to up and leave, she sold their family home, tied off a few loose ends, packed and hit the road. After a week of travelling and making multiple pit stops for Freya's sake, they rolled into Merrock and were both admittedly taken by the town. The fact that it was far away from the place where they were constantly reminded of their loss was just an added bonus. Renting a mobile home in Lupine Lane in the mean time, the mother-daughter duo are hoping for a fresh start.

[ingek73]

Princess Kate’s new ‘ballbuster’ private secretary quit before she even started work

March 26, 2023

By Kaiser Kate Middleton, Royals

Last December, we learned that the Princess of Wales’s private secretary had “quit” months beforehand. That private secretary was Hannah Cockburn-Logie, and she was with Kate starting in May 2020. She oversaw a lot of Kate’s Early Years busy-work. Kate then went without a private secretary for months, because (big surprise) she does f–k all and her staffers get unbelievably bored. Then, in February, there was suddenly a big push – Kate hired someone named Alison Corfield, who was then described as “loud” and a “ballbuster.” Corfield never started work in Kensington Palace. She opted to keep her job with Jamie Oliver. Ouch. Interestingly enough, the Telegraph got the exclusive on this, only they changed the headline after (presumably) a bitching out from Kensington Palace. The headline went from “Princess of Wales’s new private secretary rejects job, opting to stay with Jamie Oliver” to “Princess of Wales’s new private secretary rejects job to ‘stay under the radar’.” Guess Kate didn’t want to sound like she came up short compared to Jamie Oliver? Or maybe Kate doesn’t want to sound like she also can’t keep staff longer than a minute.

The “straight talking” PR guru hired as the Princess of Wales’s new private secretary has opted to stay with chef Jamie Oliver rather than take up the role, The Telegraph can reveal.

Alison Corfield, 51, is understood to have been uncomfortable with the prospect oqqf having such a high-profile position and decided instead to remain under the radar.

The mother of three, a branding and marketing expert, has worked with Oliver for eight years. A source said: “She loves the work and is an integral member of the campaigning team. She decided she just wanted to keep her head down and get on with the job she knows so well in the background. She didn’t want the publicity that comes with working at that level for such a well-known institution.”

The decision means that Kensington Palace aides have had to return to the drawing board in their search for the ideal candidate who will play a large part in shaping the Princess’s role.

[From The Telegraph]

The bar is in hell: “Kensington Palace aides have had to return to the drawing board in their search for the ideal candidate who will play a large part in shaping the Princess’s role.” She’s 41 years old and she’s been married to William for almost twelve years. Kate shouldn’t need a staffer to “play a large part” in SHAPING her role. It should have already been “shaped” years ago. We heard, endlessly, for years and years that Kate was preparing to be Princess of Wales and queen consort, that she was so keen to finally do and be something and… nothing ever came of it. She’s Princess of Wales and she’s still dependent on hiring some private secretary who will – through sheer force of will? – suddenly make all of the lazy, incompetent pieces fit together.

Speaking of, Kensington Palace’s editing elves couldn’t make Kate sound like an educated, competent woman in her 40s discussing her life’s work. This is Kate speaking to Iceland Foods’ Richard Walker about “the science” behind Early Years. Walker even says, directly, that people are really struggling financially and Kate just breezes past that, like it would never f–king occur to her to use her position and use this time and effort to… help out struggling families. It’s insane. I have to ask again, and I know I’m a broken record about this, but Jesus H., you guys: how is she not embarrassed? Are palace staffers embarrassed about this?? I guess they are, because Alison Corfield took one look at this sh-tshow and noped out of there in a hurry.

[prettyflyshyguy]

Oooooooh babey its been really, really hard to be creative recently but I'm trying to break away from incredibly unhealthy patterns of behavior and actually get something done, so while Virtual Ground is in the slow cooker I've gone back to some 'for fun' stuff again

Anyway who wants to read the revised and close to done WIP opening for Live Free Twiharder >:)

Co-written by the wonderful @snackhouse

"Dean, please just listen to me for once." 

"Look at me man, I'm a monster." 

He looked at Sam for a moment before leaning an arm on the wall by the curtained window. Resting his forehead against it, he breathed in slowly. His mind was racing, a million thoughts cascading, all clamoring for attention and action. He had to tell Lisa, he had to prepare, he had no time to prepare, he was hungry, everything was so awfully loud, what about the nest, who was going to clear the nest? What about the Alpha? How would Sam deal with the Alpha without him? What about the car? There was so much he needed to figure out before-

"No Dean, you’re not-”

Sam’s exasperated voice snapped him back to the present, and Dean turned his head to glance back, silencing his brother mid sentence. The floor between them felt like a chasm, a wound reopening that had never fully healed. It never could. Neither had given it the time and care it required. Sam had always tried, to his credit. But he knew how Dean felt about these things - about what Sam was, what he had done, what he had become once. Sam stared at his brother. He didn’t appear any different, his physical presentation and body language was the same old Dean, what was different was that he made no effort to hide his emotions. He looked petrified. His eyes were wide, sweat drenched his face, and the way he stared back, his eyes cutting through Sam’s soul, sent a chill down his spine. Dean’s penchant for stoicism frustrated him, his reluctance for genuine honesty was a staple of how he handled hard circumstances they’d found themselves in time and time again - much to Sam’s chagrin. The lack of his standard machoism had caught Sam off guard, and as he stood there observing Dean, the silence of the hotel room was deafening. 

Sam knew his brother well enough to recognise that he was still stubborn, and he struggled to listen to reason when he began to panic - and Dean had justifiable reasons to panic. He’d hoped there was a chance Dean had dodged infection by some miracle. Seeing him now, erratic, twitchy, sudden onset of misophonia and light sensitive… Despite the gloom Sam could still make out the streaks of red that stained his skin, marking him, sealing his fate. He’d rushed Dean back as soon as he found him behind the bar, bloody and bruised. Dean had insisted he go after the freak that jumped him, Sam had refused, and dragged him back to the hotel instead, immediately contacting Samuel for guidance.

Dean had scrunched his eyes shut so hard he felt the muscles in his face seize and stiffen. He could block out the light, but not the sounds. They were relentless, overbearing, but one in particular demanded his attention above all else. It filled his ears, drowned out the tv, the cars, the water pipes. The longer Sam was silent, the more he focused in on It as It tore through the background noises, shredding and discarding them until only It filled his mind. The churning rapids of thoughts and images in his head began to fade out leaving only It in their wake.  

The sudden clarity alarmed him, and in desperation he tried to busy his mind again - trying to forcibly overwhelm it with his own self-generated mental barrage. As he racked his brains, a memory snapped into his mind, louder and stronger than anything else. Gordon Walker.

No, he conceded, I am a monster. 

“We can fix this Dean,” Sam started again, “there's a cure! You're gonna be ok!"

Dean laughed. An empty, hollow, forced laugh. 

"Sammy, while I appreciate your optimism, this is not a problem you can just spitball. There's no record of fangs turning back." 

He pushed off the wall turning back to face Sam, pressing his fingers into his face and groaning. 

"I'm serious Dean, if you'd just--" 

"Don't bullshit me, Sam!” Dean snapped.

He took a few steps towards Sam. His eyes were still wide, but the terror had shifted slightly, crossing into anger. Sam instinctively took a small step back, one hand reaching into his jacket pocket in the hopes to find some item of comfort, something sharp. He didn’t want to resort to self defense, but the sensible part of him had accepted that definitively he could not take his brother in a fight, not when he was infected. A few quarters and an old gum wrapper was all he felt. Sam trusted his brother to a point, but Dean looked up at him with an intensity in his eyes usually reserved for glaring at the things they hunted together. It terrified him. It reminded him of the past. It hurt. 

“I can hear your fucking heartbeat and it's racing pretty damn fast." Dean hardly held back the accusatory tone in his voice as he broke the silence. Dean continued to stare as Sam’s face twitched slightly. 

Of course, the lore… You idiot. How could he forget? Sam was usually the one forced into book duty, in the aftermath of the attack, he hardly stopped to think about how quickly the changes would take place. It was hard to lie in front of his older brother on a normal day, and despite his insistence in earnest, he was still freaking out, and Dean had made up his mind with the evidence laid out before him. Sam trusted his grandfather was good on his word when he’d been informed there was in fact, a cure for vampirism. It came as a shock initially, and he mentally kicked himself for not thinking to bring it up with Dean sooner. There was always something more pressing, another monster to hunt, another person to help. He knew Dean hadn’t fed, he’d made sure of that. He knew it could be reversed.

Dean’s eyes narrowed slightly as he noted the increase in tempo of Sam’s heart as the stand off continued. This wasn’t the first time Sam had tried to calm him with a hope built off of a faith, but this is where they always found themselves at a fork in the road. Sam could operate on faith and faith alone, he couldn’t. He needed something real, something concrete, he needed proof - and everything concrete and firsthand he’d seen of vampires utterly disgusted him. Lenore was empirically good, he had to give credit where it was due, but she couldn’t change was she was. She just coped with it, worked around it. A life defined by running and hiding, on the knife edge of tipping over should the wrong thing happen, should you slip one day, should you give in. Life continues, the world will keep turning, but a new fundamental universal truth arises – it only gets worse. 

Cutting the thought short, he started walking, raising an arm up as he passed by Sam. Everything was quickly becoming too much again. Every sound, smell and sight was bombarding his brain like a 18 wheeler hitting a squirrel and his brief moment of reprieve ended. 

“Hey where are you–”

“Bathroom. My mouth tastes like blood and creepy-dude sweat.” Dean grunted, closing the door to the small room behind him.

It was a bullshit excuse and they both knew it, but Dean didn’t think he could make it another minute standing so close to a human. Stepping into the cramped bathroom he took a second to breathe in a space where he couldn’t hear all of Sam’s veins pulsing with blood, Dean’s gaze drifted towards the mirror. 

I wonder if I’ll even recognize myself by the end of this… 

He already knew what he was going to find, it wasn’t like he couldn’t feel them. Gently peeling back his lips, Dean struggled against the waves of nausea that spilled over him at the sight. Feeling the fangs where there was different from actually seeing them. It removed any doubt about what he had become in his mind. Lightly poking the exposed tip of a fang poking through, Dean could feel how sharp it was. Moving his fingertip upward, he slightly pushed the gum above the protrusion, pushing the tip of the fang out like massaging a cat’s foot to see its claws. 

The other needle-like teeth seemed to be eager to join their friend, as the rest of the fangs slid from their slits in Dean’s mouth. He wrenched his hand back in horror. He could feel the sharp new additions sliding over his normal teeth. Like the bars of a cage they sealed away any signs of humanity he saw in the mirror. In a matter of seconds he found himself grasping the toilet bowl for purchase has he emptied his stomach.

“Dean, you ok?” 

Sam’s voice was filtered through the wooden door and old brick walls, and Dean’s ears picked it up unnervingly clearly.  “I’m fine.” he responded harshly, between coughing on the acid and saliva in his mouth. He moved back to the sink, cupping his hands under the still running water, sipping from it to try and wash away the taste. It tasted normal, at least he still had that. He glanced back at the mirror. The teeth were gone.

[tacticalhimbo]

CHARACTER ASKS / DEVELOPMENT

full creds to mist-the-wannabe-linguist for these prompts!

answering a few of them got me inspired and i wanted to flesh the rest of them out for toni, aka "nomad" (she/he)...

so here we go!

What was the original thought that led to the creation of this character?

genuinely it was just... playing. ghost recon wildlands! which is the first game of the two (wildlands -> breakpoint). i didn't like the male customization options in the game and i wanted to create someone who had a badass, stern air to them... and that's how toni's appearance came to be!

here's an image from my first playthrough...

How long was the process before the character reached its final version? (or a version that would be clearly recognizable as the character?)

honestly? within the past year or two. and i think? i picked up gr:breakpoint in 2022 so it’s been a few years! several playthroughs of both games (wildlands being the prequel) and discovering new dialogs/missions/choices has really changed the way toni’s been characterized.

and with adding the whole angle of toni trans canon™ i added in last year… there’s still a lot of characterization i want to tweak! especially since that whole plotpoint happens after the events of breakpoint (which i’m still on the fence of exactly when; do i count episode 1 where walker dies? does it happen after trey stone dies in episode 3? am i including the r6s dlc? who knows!)

but the core of toni’s character has been molded within the past year or two / over the course of 2/3 years!

What was the first thing you decided on, the character's name, appearance, personality or their role in the story?

appearance, given the character creator. role and personality were both kind of given since the character is voiced/there aren't really dialog trees... the last thing was actually the name because afaik there isn't? an official one. ubisoft considers (cis) male!nomad canon... so given his name is anthony... antonia felt right for the (cis) female!nomad.

of course things have since changed and toni is no longer a cis woman, and plus i just like toni more and have always shortened it.

And reverse, which one of the four things did you struggle with the most?

since most of it was given, i'd honestly say something i do struggle with is capturing the personality! it's so... specific, in a good way. there's a lot of concrete development and really the hardest part is contextualizing it outside of the game-specific happenings. how does it translate into civ life? how does it translate interacting with different people? so on and so forth.

How did you choose their name and why? Was it simply based on vibes or is there any specific meaning behind the name? Are the reasons behind their name different in- and out of universe?

see above. antonia was the female equivalent to anthony (canonical name) that i liked, and toni is a nickname for both variants. nomad, the call sign, is also canonical and doesn't vary between the selected gender.

What was the thought process behind their appearance? Did you go mostly for the aesthetic or are there other reasons they look the way they do?

mostly aesthetic, to be completely honest! that said it was also a way for me to integrate some of the canonical lore and kind of expand on it in my own ways.

like, we know nomad goes on tours doing more routine military stuff, and comes from a specific military background (re: selection for Delta Force at 24; three tours with counter-terrorist Task Force 88 before being recruited into the Group for Specialized Tactics (The Ghosts)). so you know... i wanted to encapsulate some of that into the appearance. uniform hair that's shaved down for convenience (is it regulation? probably not-), an older sort of look to show experience, a collection of tattoo sleeves because every service member i've met has a fuck ton of tats, and then the scarring from one of said tours.

What is an aspect of their appearance that you like the most?

toni’s face, and more specifically: the scarring.

speaking about toni’s face in general, i just adore how average of a character you can make using the options available. i’m always in love with character creators that let you make like… non-airbrushed models. and all the rugged textures and discoloration and wrinkling… toni looks exhausted and older and that’s the whole point!! toni’s pushing 50 and has the weight of the world on her back, there is no way he’s going to look like he just walked out of a commercial shoot.

and beyond that, honing in on the facial scarring… i love the texture. i love how it frames her features. i also just love visible scarring on characters because 1) representation and 2) it really does well to tell a story. it’s a visible point of a period in toni’s life that came with a lot of shit, and it resulted in a lot of complicated feelings.

What is the origin of their personality? And let's be honest - how much of it is projecting?

most of it is in-canon dialog... but some of it is absolutely projection. the biggest projections i'd say are the whole trans masc development (something something my desire to see more non-op/older trans folks) and the desire to want to be a present parent versus not being able to due to circumstance.

How big is their role in the story? Do they make a frequent appearance or are they a character with little "screentime" but big influence? Or are they just a favourite background guy?

toni is THE main character. like... yes. in gr: wildlands they have team kingslayer (all of which toni adores and is close friends with; weaver, holt, and midas my beloved boys...) and so she does take a bit more of a neutral role despite being the team leader...

but in gr: breakpoint? she's all alone. weaver's dead, midas is m.i.a, and holt is incapacitated/potentially unable to walk again. (and you can technically have a team and i have kind of written one out since you can customize the teammates, but i imagine they're really background/don't show up until later acts)

What is their main character arc in the story? Where do they start and how do they develop? Do they get a happy ending or is their story a tragic one?

oh man oh man... to avoid explaining literally the entire two games, i'll just focus on breakpoint because that's really where the meat of toni's arc happens i think

because leading up to this, and i've written it out / made a compilation of the flashbacks and such... toni's got a whole arc with walker (another ghost/a close friend/a confidante). and it comes to fruition when it turns out he's betrayed everything they stood for and joined up with some incompetent tech billionaire to create a new world; to plunge it into war and show how archaic things are.

and it is very much not a happy ending by any means. a can of worms has been opened and the only solution is to kill the person she really cared for/thought she had solace in... and that shit hits. it changes toni irreversibly. he's much more bitter after that and really does develop (even more) trust issues. like. sure. the world is saved! but what is left for you at that point? you have nobody. you recover 2/3 friends and end up having to go separate ways anyway... you're truly alone.

Is there any existing character from other media that your character resembles? Was the resemblance intentional or was it a coincidence?

i don't think toni resembles anyone specific, but i will admit i drew inspiration personality wise from black widow/natasha and... uhm. mike ehrmantraut. the former was accidental and the latter was entirely intentional.

Do you have a playlist for the character? What songs do you associate with them and why?

i do have a playlist! i have one for just toni, and one for her/walker as a ship. i'll link both here but the associations i went for are like... dad rock. it's that post that's like "2010s weebs and gym bros" because. yeah! classic, dad rock. lots of like... divorce rock specifically. does that make sense? no.

but seriously! a lot of it is just... the vibe. there are probably a few songs on each playlist i could really elaborate on more but i am simply choosing not to at this time.

Do you have a voice claim for the character? What do you imagine the character sounds like?

nomad does have a voice! again... canonically voiced so i didn't need to think much there. you can hear it in the vid i linked above or in this snippet

between the two games, since they changed vas, i personally prefer alix wilton's performance (in breakpoint) and headcanon that as the proper(tm) voice.

Do you have any quotes tied to the character, either from the story itself or from another source that fit them?

i genuinely forget the source of this one but: “ IT’S NOT ENOUGH TO TAKE THEM OUT — WE HAVE TO SEND A MESSAGE. ” (ignore the formatting; it was on a post i made for reference).

Have you ever made a moodboard for them?

i have! i have a pinterest board for toni, plus this little moodboard i made doing a character inspiration meme over on my roleplay blog

Is there any memes or running jokes associated with the character, both in- and out of universe?

oh yeah. one of them, courtesy of my brother, is the whole idea that nomad is... a cryptid. like bigfoot. untraceable, always leaving destruction in her wake, and can never be caught on film beyond this fucked up blur. and that people will whisper about different things they've witnessed but nothing can ever be confirmed and it's just... funny to us. definitely an out-of-universe concept. mostly.

Are there any motifs or symbols associated with the character? How are they represented, in their design, personality or in some other way?

i'm honestly not sure; i never really thought about it. i wouldn't say there is? but i could be wrong there.

Does the character have other characters connected to them? Do you have a family tree and "offscreen" connections made up for them or do they exist in a vacuum purely for the purpose of the story?

yes! they have a decent web that i actually made specifically for this post so-

this cuts out regan and sarah, unfortunately, but this is toni's family tree! she's the biological child of samuel fisher and marilyn perryman (nee sutton), stepdaughter of finley. she married kian and had her son, thomas. when she remarried to julien, she had her twin girls amber and jasmine. and thomas is expecting his own child, who they've named sam after... sam.

What is your general favourite thing about the character? What is your least favourite?

favorite thing: her complexity. the way toni views the world is… quite different to how i view it. all in terms of experience, narrative, and general politics (lest we forget ghost recon is a tom clancy game). and so it’s really fun to research things to really try to hone in and understand what her psychology is. but then again that’s my favorite thing about writing/developing any character, so maybe i’m biased JFKLDAJFLSDJFKLASJF

least favorite thing: this is a rough one.. i think politics aside (see: above), my least favorite thing has to be how much of a brain worm character they are. definitely more of a lighthearted/joke answer, but seriously! every media i get into or circle back to, i think of how toni would fit in there. like. i’ve been watching house md. and i’ve started thinking about a side plot where toni is a ‘jane doe’ patient (similar to that air force pilot) because the show does take place around when toni gets the injuries that cause the facial scarring and result in him having to undergo pt. or another recent-ish one– far cry 6 au where toni ends up being a cia contact that comes in courtesy of juan (in place of willis since, he does not make an appearance again 😔; can’t have old men yaoi so we get an old man and his fucked up little gremlin instead)

Bonus question: share any additional thoughts, art, favourite scenes, anything you've been waiting for a chance to ramble about

oh boy. i fear i do not have anything to new show (yet) but i am planning on getting myself a little birthday commish of her and walker perhaps... :}

beyond that i genuinely think i have covered rambling so! this will be the lovely conclusion to the post now methinks. i will leave y'all with some of my fave gifs i've made as a treat for reading everything

[yestolerancepro]

Tolerance Ability not In Ability A Producers Commentary 25th Anniversary Edition

Part 4 – Accessibility, Social Life and Relationships

My commentary of Tolerance continues and we are looking at the part of the film that deals with accessibility, social life and relationships.

14 minutes 29 seconds Robert goes into town to try and get a birthday card for Julie, but finds some of the shops and cash machines inaccessible. Does anybody know what the drum and bass music is here? Please let me know, so I can add it to the soundtrack playlist

Deleted scene

The next deleted scene is unnumbered in the script, but it would have seen Robert go into a bank to get some money for Julie's birthday present. In the final film, we only see Robert struggling to get some money from nearby cash machines. You can read about banking issues when you have a disability in another blog which is coming soon called Breaking the Bank  

Robert wheels into the bank and we immediately see he has a problem with the height of the counters; he has to reach up to put his cheque book in the trough; the counter woman looks at Robert as if he has done something wrong. An assistant taps him on the shoulder and Robert turns with a start:

ASSISTANT: Can I help you?

ROBERT: Why, what have I done wrong?

ASSISTANT: Nothing, but I thought you might like to conduct your business over there.  

She points to a table where it is easy for Robert to see exactly what he is doing.

ROBERT: But I only want some money from my account.

ASSISTANT: I can sort it out, so you can see what you’re getting.

ROBERT: OK

The Shooting Schedule says that if the bank scene had gone ahead it would have been recorded on Wednesday 18th August

17 minutes 05 seconds Mrs Jones gets what she deserves as her car breaks down. If you look in the background, you see Jeremy Walker making a sly cameo as Julie’s taxi driver. Well deserved too, as it was Jeremy’s idea to make Tolerance in the first place.

17 minutes 29 seconds

Odeon Cinema sequence it was part of the UCI Cinema chain when we shot the Tolerance film it become an Odeon Cinema in 2006.

Matthew my Brother tells me that that branch of the Odeon Cinema will be shutting soon because of a new shopping development being built as part of the Kingsgate shopping centre.

The pub which also featured in the film and where we had the wrap party The Ropewalk is now also closed for business. according to the camra guide the pub was closed on the 3rd of March 2020 and became closed in the long term on the 3rd of March 2022 its future uncertain.

The last of our film spoofs - this time to An Officer and a Gentleman. David remembers this scene vividly as he quotes it both in his introduction for Tolerance and in an interview he gave me later for the films publicity material.  

 I don’t know if you knew this but there was a bit of controversy on the making of the Tolerance film in hiring non disabled actors to play disabled roles if you remember we made all the cast and Crew for the duration of the shoot use a wheelchair 24/7 how did you find the experience?

I wasn’t aware of the controversy, but expressed my own reservations to Richard (the director) when we first talked about me playing the role. There’s a dream sequence in the film that required my character to walk, so ultimately I felt that was sufficient justification And David again mentioned the Officer and a Gentleman sequence for the introduction to The Tolerance film

‘I played Rob - a wheelchair user - even though I’m not a wheelchair user myself. At the heart of the film is a drive to see the person not the disability, so maybe it shouldn’t matter who plays the character - but it’s certainly worth thinking through.’

 In fact, Rob needs to walk in the film (no spoilers!), and that was the principal driver behind using an actor who was not a wheelchair user.

 You can judge for yourselves whether that decision was justified. Perhaps the producers would not make the same choice today. Perhaps the story would be re-shaped to enable the casting of actors with disabilities. 

Watching the film again recently Gemma Blagbourgh remembered that her and Helen Batty had to Iron David’s officer suit quite a few times to give the pristine look that you saw in the finished film the flowers that Rob gave his girlfriend Julie proved a a bit of a problem too as Ben Brown remembers oh those flowers that came from one of the films sponsors who owned a flower shop called The flower basket and they were great looked really nice but they kept at my house as I recall over night and we had to water them quite a few times to stop the poor things from dying ha ha 

The picture bellow Helen and Charlotte giving each other a hug if you look carefully u can see those dying flowers that Robert gives Julie in the Officer and a Gentleman dream sequence on one of the seats of the bus

Talking about Gemma she was the second member of Tolerance to appear in the film, Gemma appears as the cinema manager. I had the day off that day but the rest of the cast and crew had to get up at 5.30am to shoot the cinema scenes. Gemma said about her Tolerance experience afterwards:

‘Yes I really enjoyed the whole experience of working on Tolerance. The only thing I didn’t like were the early mornings; the earliest being half past five in the morning when I had to film my scenes. It was long hours, but I wanted to show people with a disability that you can work and you can work in positions of authority.’

Deleted scene

Scene 26: (Internal) Cinema Auditorium

The last scene left on the cutting room floor was a short scene that takes place after the montage where we see Robert get the job at the cinema.

I have a feeling that this scene was cut because it didn’t really add much to the overall film. Robert is making a reference to Rocky Balboa’s girlfriend, Adrian, played by Talia Shire in the film series.  

Robert and Julie are sat at the very front of the auditorium and are straining to see the screen.

ROBERT punches the air: ADRIAN!!!!

JULIE looks across at him: Who’s Adrian?

ROBERT: Nothing, nobody, just thinking.

JULIE: Well think on this. If you get this job, you can devise a way we can sit in the middle of the cinema and see properly.

Julie laughs at him and grabs his hand.

So Robert gets the job at the cinema and we see a montage of shots of him enjoying his new role to the music of the The Professionals theme music. I like the scene but I would have used the classic Pearl and Dean Cinema Music.

If you don't know what I am talking about click here thanks to YouTube (5) Pearl and Dean 1970s - YouTube

21 minutes 41 seconds Ropewalk scenes. These were all shot on the last day of shooting, so if we all look the worst for wear, you know why. Quite a bit of footage from the Wrap Party was used to form the film end credits

 Rob Martin took 3 photos of the last day Some other photos from that last day have recently been unearthed by Tolerance member, Helen Batty, and I have included a few in this blog. Thank you Helen for letting me share these.

*Party scene at the end. If you looking for me in that scene, you will have a job finding me. Blink and you miss me! In addition, there are also a couple of errors with people’s credits; Helen Rees, for example, is incorrectly credited as Helen Briggs.

It goes without saying that I would like to say thank you to all the members of the Tolerance cast and crew, and to all those companies that provided us with donations big and small that made up our £8000 budget.

** The introduction for the film was published on Tumblr website on 6 April, 2018 ahead of the films re-launch on the same day. https://yestolerancepro.tumblr.com/ 

If you have read this and want to help the Tolerance Project, please follow us on Facebook for up-dated information:or to give a donation please click on the above link to our gofundme page 

https://gofund.me/5cf25de4

Or on Twitter @TolerancePro

Notes

Thank you to David Smith and Gemma Blagbourgh for the interviews The Cast and Crew of the original Tolerance film for allowing me to use the behind the scenes photos Rob Martin for taking the photos in the first place and finally Ruth Sharpe for the editing duties.

Also thanks to Gemma Blagbourgh and Matthew Brown for helping me fill in some of the blanks

Like part 3 of the making of blog Part 4 has had quite a bit of new material added to it the making of the Officer and a Gentleman spoof was originally detailed in a Tolerance Project extra piece which has been deleted from our Tumblr page so I have included that material in this new version of the blog as well an extra photo which also came from the Tolerance Extra blog and a load of Screengrabs from the Tolerance film are also new to this version of the blog .

If you have read this and want to help the Tolerance Project, please follow us on Facebook for up-dated information:or to give a donation please click on the above link to our gofundme page 

Also Thank you to Doctor who magazine for letting me nick there Fact of fiction format ha ha

Photo captions

Screengrabs from the Tolerance film thanks to Ian Medley

1 Robert (David Smith trying to get his money out of an ATM

2 Jeremy Walker making his cameo apperance in the Tolerance film as Julies Clare Abbot Taxi Driver if it wasn't for Jeremy we wouldn't be making the Tolerance film in the first place thanks Jeremy

3 David Smith Doing his best Richard Gere Impression for the Officer and a Gentlemen spoof

4 The Ropewalk Pub Huddersfield

5 Gemma Blagbourgh playing the Cinema manager

6 and 7 Robert in his dream job working for the UCI cinema

Behind the Scenes photos with thanks to Rob Martin and Helen Batty

1 Paul Lockwood Soundman with Claire Abbot and David Smith

2 Paul Lockwood Soundman 2 with Richard Hellawell Claire Abbot and David Smith

3 4 and 5

The Wrap party

Charlotte Helen Batty and Micheal Weaver Claire Abbot Ropewalk Kevin Spencer Playing pool with Laura Brown Jonathan Lyndley and Richard Hellawell

[starsmuserainbow]

1OO IMPORTANT CHARACTER QUESTIONS

taken from beth kinderman and nikki walker’s the 100 most important things to know about your character. a good list to help develop a character’s background, personality, and general aspects.

(Template link here)

PART 1: THE BASICS

What is your full name?

"Kor'rue, but honestly? I much prefer my earthen name - Starlight!"

Where and when were you born?

"I don't remember the date or anything - and the dates are different on Tamaran anyway. It was in the house of my mom!"

Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)

"I only know my mother. She was called Fros'rue, she was wonderful! She liked drawing, and did a lot of art, and she cared very good for me! Only that she never told me about my father."

Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?

"Like most tamaraneans, I'm an only child. As far as I know at least, though, since I don't know my father -- oooh! I could totally have some half-siblings somewhere! How cool would that be?"

Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.

"I live alone! On Earth! On my tree! It's... well, it's a tree. With many decorations that I put up, colorful and shiny and everything."

What is your occupation?

"I don't have any - Earth doesn't really let me get money, because I'm too young or because I don't have any papers, or something."

Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.

"I have at least somewhat the typical tamaranean skin - which is more orange than the pink that humans more have. My eyes are somewhere between pink and purple - my mom called them pink but they feel more between the colors to me, and my sclera is white. My hair is iridescent, it's nice and all, but once I get my hands on money I can't wait to try all the hair colors that earth has! I try to wear clothes as colorful as possible!"

To which social class do you belong?

"I have no idea!"

Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?

"Nah!"

Are you right- or left-handed?

"I have no idea! I think... wait a moment, let me... yes, I think I use my right hand more."

What does your voice sound like?

"I don't know. Uh... lighter than I'd like."

What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?

"I don't think there are any. I use amazing and cool and these things a lot these days, but that's just because Earth is so amazing!"

What do you have in your pockets?

"A box that... I don't know from what it is, but look at how it shines in the light! How could anyone have thrown that into the trash? -- That's a few sweets, especially those from Yuko (rosecoloredmuses) I'll keep for really desperate times since they're sooooo good - here's some coins I found, and a few rainbow-colored ribbons!"

Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?

"I don't think so? I really doubt I'd be aware of those myself though. Shouldn't you ask someone else if I have those?"

PART 2: GROWING UP

How would you describe your childhood in general?

"It... uh... it was okay. I had a mom that cared very good for me and I felt very comfortable at home. School was... not that fun."

What is your earliest memory?

"I remember my mom swaying me around! I was probably crying, or something, but I don't remember that."

How much schooling have you had?

"All the general stuff of tamaranean schooling."

Did you enjoy school?

"What do you want me to say? Learning and stuff was okay, but it was a struggle to assure myself a normal treatment when I looked so different. And I'm not a fan of the whole 'asserting dominance'- thing that my people are so much into."

Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?

"Tamaranean schooling includes knowledge of how to use all our abilities, too."

While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.

"I didn't really, no! It was never my goal to become like another tamaranean - though, my mother maybe, but also not really - and I didn't really know who I was. I still don't."

While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?

"My mom was great, we got along so good!"

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

"I always liked dancing and moving - I wanted to be a famous dancer or flyer!"

As a child, what were your favorite activities?

"Didn't I just say? I liked to dance, to fly, just to be active!"

As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?

"Well, I was energetic I bet, and probably a little weird, uh, I don't know! I was happy and curious?"

As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?

"I didn't really make friends."

When and with whom was your first kiss?

"It's not a big deal on Tamaran. We do it with those that teach us how to learn languages."

Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?

If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today.

PART 3: PAST INFLUENCES

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?

"Actually following my decision to leave Tamaran."

Who has had the most influence on you?

"My mom, I think."

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

"Does surviving count? Because suriving travelling to all these planets feels like a pretty great achievement to me."

What is your greatest regret?

"That one time, that one planet I visited? I ate what I assumed to be food - I was really hungry - and it turned out to have been a very important, almost-holy object of their world. I deeply regret causing so much chaos."

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?

"Maybe that above?"

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?

"I'm... not proud of it. But yes, very likely."

When was the time you were the most frightened?

"After I first left Tamaran and reached a new planet."

What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?

"In school. There was a form of weight-lifting, and somehow at that moment, I couldn't lift a thing. Like, not even the lightest thing available. That was so embarrassing. I hate it when my powers suddenly fail."

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?

"That my mother never told me of my father! Simple, because I want to know!"

What is your best memory?

"All the times with my mother. I can't choose."

What is your worst memory?

"Maybe that embarassing thing I mentioned before, or one of those times where the people of a planet decided to throw me into their prisons. Those places are disgusting."

PART 4: BELIEFS & OPINIONS

Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?

"I like to believe everything's good, so I'd say optimistic."

What is your greatest fear?

"Uh... I'd... really rather not go as deep. ... Okay, fine. To never get the feeling of belonging anywhere."

What are your religious views?

"Honestly, I don't know."

What are your political views?

What are your views on sex?

Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?

"I don't think I could do it. It never is right to take someone's life!"

In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?

"Hurt others for no reason!"

Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?

"I never really thought about it much. No idea."

What do you believe makes a successful life?

"Knowing who you are, doing what you like. These things."

How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?

"I try to be honest. I had before gotten downright sick for not standing to what I thought and felt, so I'm really not eager to have that again."

Do you have any biases or prejudices?

"I don't think so. I don't think too highly of the members of the royal family of Tamaran, but I don't think that has to do with prejudices or biases."

Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?

"Well, kill, for instance. At least I'd never do so on purpose or when I can avoid it. Because it's wrong, obviously!"

Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?

"Currently? I can't think of anything. Outside of, like, survival or something, which I can't exactly die for, though."

PART 5: RELATIONSHIPS W/OTHERS

In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?

"I think it's important to treat others how you want to be treated. So I'm trying to be friendly and open. Of course it changes if I know someone! If they're rude, I won't bother trying to keep being friendly!"

Who is the most important person in your life, and why?

"That means someone that still lives, right? I don't have anyone I think."

Who is the person you respect the most, and why?

"I can't think of anyone! I mean, I respect those I've made friends with, but, it doesn't feel right to say that since it's more than that, since it's being friends and all?"

Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.

"I'm not, uh... I don't think I can call anyone a 'best friend', I'm still at the start of getting to know everyone."

Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.

"Uh, hello? You are aware that I'm still young, right? Maybe I'll want these things later, but for now I'm really not interested."

Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.

"Again, no thanks. Maybe some day."

What do you look for in a potential lover?

"I am not looking!"

How close are you to your family?

"I don't have anyone anymore. Mom's gone. And I don't know my father."

Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?

"Do I really have to think about these things already? I'm just living!"

Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?

"... I don't know. Depends on where I am, and what's the help about. Minato (dxfiedfxte) is nice, or maybe Supergirl (karaoftomorrow)?"

Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?

"I'd really rather just protect myself. But, uh... there's Supergirl as I just mentioned, she's a hero and all, and there's also another, I met Flash (flashgotthis) once before. I think heroes are pretty good in the 'protecting'."

If you died or went missing, who would miss you?

"... I don't know. Maybe the friends I made."

Who is the person you despise the most, and why?

"There's no one! Maybe Moonshot, but despise is a bit much."

Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?

"I don't like arguing much, but I won't be silent if there's something bothering me."

Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?

"I'm not really a leader anywhere, no."

Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?

"I don't really mind! It can be fun either way, it matters more if the people are friendly or not, than how many they are."

Do you care what others think of you?

"Not at all!"

PART 6: LIKES & DISLIKES

What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?

"I like to use these skates that Earth has! And I like to decorate my tree."

What is your most treasured possession?

"This stone that I wear as necklace. It's... on Tamaran, we get stones that represent us to birth. They didn't have anything to match my weirdness, though, and I got a simple one-color one, and after two years or so, my mom gifted me this one. I still wonder where it's from."

What is your favorite color?

"The full rainbow!"

What is your favorite food?

"Earth has so much, and I barely know anything yet! I absolutely can't choose a favorite yet!"

What, if anything, do you like to read?

"I'm... not too big on reading. I can, totally, but there's just so much stuff that's more interesting."

What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?

"Something to keep my focus, to just feel great!"

Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?

"I've been told that smoking isn't good. I don't quite get what it is for in general, but I'll try my best to stay away from it. The same goes for these other things, at least I assume they are similar?"

How do you spend a typical Saturday night?

"Same as any other day. Depends on where I am or who's with me."

What makes you laugh?

"Good jokes, of course!"

What, if anything, shocks or offends you?

"Violence against animals. Just, only the thought. Ew."

What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?

"I'd go and look into these things with the bright colors and loud music! Clubs, they're called I think? I've been curious of those for a while already."

How do you deal with stress?

"I don't think I do that well."

Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?

"I prefer spontaneity!"

What are your pet peeves?

PART 7: SELF IMAGES & OTHER

Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?

"I don't really have any routine! I wake up, I enjoy the weather, I see if anyone or anything is around that's interesting. I look for food, and eventually there's sleep again. Honestly, it's cool when any routine gets disrupted."

What is your greatest strength as a person?

"I don't know. Maybe my eagerness?"

What is your greatest weakness?

"I have no idea! That I'm weaker than other tamaraneans? That my powers sometimes fail?"

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

"I don't wanna change anything! I like me as I am!"

Are you generally introverted or extroverted?

"I think I'm open, so I guess extroverted."

Are you generally organized or messy?

"More messy, I think."

Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.

"Decorating! I like to think I'm at least okay at dancing! And uh.... does knowledge of worlds count?

I can't sit and wait. I'm bad at lying, and... and I'm bad at making lasting connections. I think. But that's maybe simply because I'm still on a search!"

Do you like yourself?

"Yeah, definitely!"

What are your reasons for being an adventurer (or doing the strange and heroic things that RPG characters do)? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons…)

"I'm exploring because I'm searching for clues to who my father is, or at least what he is so I know what I am partly! ... And... maybe I'm also just hoping to come across a place to feel at home at during my search."

What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?

"Find who I am, and find a place where I belong."

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

"Hopefully knowing who I am, and perhaps already having chosen where I'd like to stay."

If you could choose, how would you want to die?

"... I'd really rather not. Is 'old age' an option? Then that because I don't wanna think about dying."

If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.

"I'd say my goodbyes to all the people I know here on Earth, and then... I think I'd leave to try some more to find out what I am. I really don't wanna just, never know."

What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?

"You just have to continue with death, do you? I don't know, and I don't wanna think about it."

What three words best describe your personality?

"I like the word spunky! Also, colorful and friendly sound fitting."

What three words would others probably use to describe you?

"I don't know!"

If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character? (You might even want to speak as if he or she were sitting right here in front of you, and use proper tone so he or she might heed your advice…)

That she should give up her search. She has friends here on Earth, people that like her and that she likes, and with always wanting to continue her search, Starlight barely even realizes it. She already has found a home here, and yet she feels like she needs to still find it.

[nbatrades]

Charlotte Bobcats Deal Peja Drobnjak to Atlanta Hawks

On August 16th, 2004, the Charlotte Bobcats traded center Peja Drobnjak to the Atlanta Hawks for a 2005 second round draft pick (Ronny Turiaf).

The expansion Charlotte Bobcats arrived on the NBA scene in 2004 and used some unique strategies to build their team. Owned by Bob Johnson and ran by veteran coach and executive Bernie Bickerstaff, Charlotte's first player ever on the roster was big man Peja Drobnjak.

Drobnjak was with the Los Angeles Clippers and the Bobcats agreed on a deal with Los Angeles where Charlotte would select the 6-foot-11 perimeter shooting center in the June 22, 2004 NBA Expansion draft.

As part of the arrangement with the Clippers, Charlotte swapped its fourth overall pick and the 33rd pick in the 2004 NBA Draft to Los Angeles in exchange for the second overall selection.

Though Drobnjak was the first player to join the Bobcats roster, Charlotte had no real interest in keeping the center. Charlotte eventually worked out a deal to send Drobnjak to the Atlanta Hawks for a second round pick in 2005.

Drobnjak joined a Hawks team expected to struggle during the 2004-05 season. The Hawks had acquired veteran forwards Antoine Walker and Al Harrington but had a lot of youth on the roster such as Josh Childress, Josh Smith and Boris Diaw.

With a new roster and a new head coach in Mike Woodson, Atlanta struggled out of the gate, going 2-14 over the first 16 games. The losses piled up as Atlanta lost 50 of its first 60 games. The Hawks were 29th in both offensive and defensive efficiency during the 2004-05 season and finished with the worst record in the NBA at 13-69.

Drobnjak was primarily a reserve at the center position for the Hawks and participated in 71 games, registering 8.4 PPG, 3.4 RPG, 0.7 APG and 0.6 SPG in 20.2 MPG.

Drobnjak's team option of $3.1 million for the 2005-06 season was declined by the Hawks, making him a free agent after the season. Drobnjak signed a contract with Tau Ceramica in Spain.

The 2005 second round pick the Bobcats acquired from Atlanta in the trade was sent to the Los Angeles Lakers four months later. In that deal, Charlotte also sent a 2008 second round pick (later amended to a 2009 second round pick per Pro Sports Transactions) to the Lakers for shooting guard Kareem Rush. The Lakers used that pick on Gonzaga big man Ronny Turiaf who was selected 37th overall in the 2005 NBA Draft.

Atlanta Hawks general manager Billy Knight on adding Drobnjak (via Hawks.com):

"With his NBA and international background, Peja is an experienced and physical big man who can also shoot the ball from the perimeter. He has a good feel for the game and strong work ethic. We're pleased to add him to our roster."

Charlotte Bobcats general manager and head coach Bernie Bickerstaff on the purpose of the trade (via The Charlotte Observer):

"It clears a logjam. It clears space at the (center) spot and gives guys like (Primoz) Brezec, (Jamal) Sampson and Emeka more opportunity. And it gives the kid (Drobnjak) a chance to play more in Atlanta."

How the deal replenishes a second round pick for Charlotte (via Bobcats.com):

"This trade allows us to open up a roster spot and also gives us a second round pick next year that we lost last month. We had six players at the power forward and center positions and this will relieve some of the logjam and present more minutes for the guys on our roster."

Image via Getty Images/Jonathan Daniel