#guys pls if I get like this again actually shoot me im not even kidding PLS
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
kavehater · 6 months ago
Text
Actually this is all fruit loops’ fault she re ignited the obsession
Blaming myself cause sometimes I have a moment of pure obsession so hard I end up feeling queasy HELP
1 note · View note
themostlesbianever · 2 months ago
Text
ive decided to put all my thoughts in one post instead of a thousand
- ive said it before and ill say it again hen looks so damn good in those pants
- go eddie you can do it
- chim cant keep it steady, hes absolutely booking it to the hospital because you told him to get there THREE TIMES FASTER
- YES EDDIE GOOD JOB
- dad?
- i think i do like the moustache actually
- YES AMAZING FOSTER RECORD
- CHILD HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED FROM MY BABIES
- WHY ARENT THEY ALLOWED TO KEEP CONTACT WITH THE KID THAT YOU TOOK FROM THEM FOR NO FUCKING REASON
- hen babe i love the suit
- ALSO HEN DIDNT EVEN KNOW CHIM WAS GONNA FOSTER MARA FOR HER SO ITS NOT LIKE SHE DID IT ON PURPOSE OR ANYTHING
- yes hen come through
- karen babe you look so good
- WHAT THE FUCK
- STOP TORTURING MY BABIES
- YES BOBBY THAT IS YOUR HOUSE
- MICHEAL COMEBACK????
- PLS BRING MICHEAL BACK
- poor athena, so many memories in that house☹️
- I love those pants hen omg
- mara is adorable stop☹️☹️☹️
- FUCK YOU OLIVIA
- get over your son🙄
- no sorry thats insensitive but it was literally his own FUCKING FAULT HE REFUSED CARE😠😠😠
- hen deserves the world and you know it ortiz
- omg now i wish they had bodycams then so there was proof
- NO ORTIZ AND GERRARD ARE FRIENDS
- WHAT THE FUCK
- hen youre adorable look at her face
- YUP HEN TELL HIM
- BOBBY IS OUR CAPTAIN
- can we just kill off ortiz pls
- "he touches me" "🤨"
- all buck talks about is quitting😭
- CHRIS COME HOME
- omg bobby doesnt like the moustache
- omg eddie is gonna shave his moustache to get chris back im calling it now
- ALSO THIS IS A PARALEL TO WHEN BOBBY WAS PLANNING YHE WEDDING AND EVERYONE WAS COMPLAINING ABOUT CHIM BEING CAPTAIN
- pitties always get si much hate but theyre the sweetest dogs☹️
- TIGER TIME
- *insert oliver saying tigah*
- that smell is a big kitty
- i love big kitties
- tigers are so pretty
- BABY TIGER
- they just gave gerrard a gun the fuck
- i say give eddie the gun, hes ex army
- chim you look so cool
- i wish we could see hen do a rope rescue (so i can see her in a harness)
- SHOOT IT NOW CHIM
- good job chim
- gerrard is a fan of the show😨
- I SAY SWITCH EM, PUT GERRARD AS THE TECHNICAL ADVISER
- OMG YES FIRE YOURSELF GERRARD
- why are you here eddie? whats going
- OH THATS THE TWISTED GUYS DAD
- shame on you mike😠
- cheerleading aint for the weak
- uh oh
- HOW IS HEN AN ENEMY SHES NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG
- FUCK OFF ORTIZ AND GERRARD
- FUCK ALL OF YOU
- GET YOUR HANDS OFF THE 118 BITCHES
- this is stressful
- lets not break wilson please🙏
- you are a lot alike, youre both fucking bitches
- if there was no evil woman behind it shutting down the 118 makes no sense, if it was simply for budget cuts. The 118 is like the best firehouse out there no? so why shut them down
(yes i know its because that bitch is evil)
- hen baby i love your outfits
- god damn, put me in this show so i can hit this bitch
- OMG YEA
- FUCK YEAH HEN
- OH BODY CAMS TO THE RESCUE
- YES OMG YES OMG YES
- YES HEN
- OMG BOBBY THE MAN YOU ARE
- YES BOBBY FLIPPED GERRARD
- I LOVE THESE PEOPLE IM GONNA CRY
- OMG MARA IS HOME
- AND WE GOT TANKTOP HEN OH MY LORDDD🫠🫠
- fuck me hen looks so good in tanktops i need her
- look at her arms
- jesus christ denny is tall
- WELCOME BACK CAP
- OMG THEY DID THE THING I SAID
- THEY SWITCHED BOBBY AND GERRARD
- I SAID THEY SHOULD DO THAT AND THEY DID
6 notes · View notes
twodimecastle · 3 years ago
Text
fifty bucks & six months.
spencer reid x gender neutral reader new relationship, secret keeping nonsense, 4.5k words, ao3 a/n; turns out i love writing texting fic but tumblr destroys the formatting rip
zero months.
You smile conspiratorially, extending a pinkie towards Spencer and he gives you a skeptical look.
“You know the odds of being found out immediately are-” he starts, but you cut him off.
“Astronomical, I know. I know. But don’t you think it’ll be fun to see how long we can push it?” you wheedle, not caring that your voice sounds more like begging than is strictly dignified because seeing the way Spencer’s nose crinkles in amusement at your heavy handed persuasion is too adorable to pass up. You scoot closer on the couch, tapping the end of his nose with your pinkie finger, letting him catch your hand between his as you continue “I think we’ve got a good shot at hiding it for a little while. It would be like a game.”
Spencer draws your captive hand to his lips, brushing them across your knuckles and watching fondly as you forge ahead in your campaign to persuade him, enjoying the show and the attention too much to tell you he’s already on board. Your eyes are shining with the prospect of the caper, and you’ve made no move to take your hand back from him, and Spencer’s pretty sure he’d be more than happy to sit with you in this moment forever. “I mean-” you go on, gesturing animatedly with your free hand, “you’re like-a really good liar when you want to be. And everyone else always forgets how good you are at it.”
He snorts at that and the sound makes you light up, eyes tracking the arch of his brows, the warmth in his soft brown eyes, memorising the way he looks like this; utterly unbothered, completely at ease. It might be your favourite version of him, but that race has always been a tight one with no clear winner in sight. You have lots of favourite versions of Spencer. Twisting your hand in his, you tangle your fingers together, savouring the way you feel his thumb glide delicately along your skin and the unhidden joy in his face at the simple show of affection.
Time to play your trump card.
“$50 says we can hide it from the whole group for at least six months. If everyone figures it out before then, you win. But if not everyone has worked it out by then, I win.”
The mischievous shine in your eyes is irresistible, and Spencer smiles, disentangling one of his hands from yours to extend his own pinky finger.
“You’re on.”
The words barely make it out of his mouth before you’re colliding with him, pressing your lips to his.
two months.
“So, how long has this whole thing been going on?” Derek’s question catches Spencer off guard, and, based on the way he can see you freeze in his peripheral vision, takes you by surprise as well. Sliding into the driver's seat of the SUV, Derek continues “I hope you didn’t think you were gonna be able to keep me in the dark for long, pretty boy. You should know better than that.”
Following mechanically after him, Spencer takes the passenger seat, trying to frame his next statement as carefully as possible as he hears your door close and the car start. “We were-going to tell you guys-” he begins uncomfortably, glancing back to you for support, but you look just as on edge as he feels. “We were just gonna-keep it to ourselves for a while-before telling Hotch and everything-” he tries again, the mounting tension levering his shoulders higher and higher with every passing moment, but then Derek just laughs, shaking his head.
“Hey, I’m happy for you, kid. For both of you.” He spares a look at you in the back seat through the rear view mirror, and you can feel the tension in your jaw relax, the furrows in your brow straightening out at the note of approval in Derek’s voice. “I’m glad you two finally figured it out,” he says, fondly, and you laugh.
“I bet Spence we could keep it from you guys at least six months,” you explain, reaching forwards through the centre console to link your pinky with Spencer’s, and the touch of your hand releases the last of the tension he had been harbouring as he covers your hand with the other one of his own. He knows Derek clocks the motion, filing it away in his mind somewhere, but he doesn’t care about the scrutiny so much right now. Not when your hand is so warm and comfortable in his.
Derek reaches for the dial on the radio and flicks through the channel, thinking about something, and as you watch, a slow mischievous smirk spreads across his face a moment later before he glances first at Spencer and then at you.
“I’ll tell you what,” he says to you, and Spencer can feel a familiar grin tugging at his own lips as he watches a plan take shape in his friend’s eyes. “I’m happy to sit on this information for a while for a cut of the winnings from whichever one of you comes out on top.” He snorts good naturedly as he continues “I have my own bet to win with Prentiss, so if you two help me win that one, I’ll cut you in too.”
“A quid pro quo of sorts,” Spencer says slowly, and he feels your fingers tighten around his, as you snort softly, and he knows instinctually you’re grinning the same way you always do when you’re winning a game. “I think we can do that.”
Derek grins, turning the music up as he nods, eyes on the road. “Then you two love birds have got yourselves a deal.”
two months and two weeks.
PG: youre not as slick as you think you are ;)
YN: ???
PG: ;))))))))) you should invest in some concealer for your work bag sweetness or tell the good doctor to pay more attention to whats visible in your work clothes
YN: oh my fucking god wait how do you even know thats how that happened
PG: im all knowing and all seeing im like the omnipotent goddess of the fbi
YN: derek blabbed
PG: he sang like a canary but also im an omnipotent goddess im also totally clued in on the whole bet situation with em so for the low low price of every single juicy detail about how this adorableness went down you can buy my silence :)
YN: im getting derek decaf coffee on all coffee runs from now on >:( traitors dont get caffeine
PG: darling sweet angel i need deets all of them like immediately
YN: >:( fine ok so. after that case down in georgia a few months ago? the weird one? with the creepy mother son thing?
PG: omg yuck pls dont remind me im here for the CUTENESS not the MURDER
YN: sorryyyyyyy anyway so spence was like being super weird about it all on the plane and whatever but he was doing that super annoying thing where he ignores it and says hes fine so everyone leaves him alone
PG: YEAH why does everyone here do that ALL THE TIME its SO annoyingggg
YN: ikr its insufferable and like super not subtle ANYWAY. spence was being weird and whatever and i just. refused to let him sulk on his own or whatever like i could tell there was something bothering him and so after work i insisted that we were gonna get like shitty diner food or whatever and watch a movie and he knows better than to say no to me
PG: smart boy
YN: so we got fries and milkshakes and then went back to his place to watch a movie and he was still like weird and silent and like brooding yknow? but whatever just figured hed talk about it when he was ready so i put on a movie and offered to make popcorn and then he was just staring at me and he looked so SAD and TIRED and i thought id done something wrong like the poor guy looked like he was gonna cry and i was panicking over fucking popcorn and then he says ‘why are you always so nice to me?’
PG: oh my god hes like if a sad victorian orphan was actually a triplicate phd holder
YN: i was SO thrown off i was like spencer. spencer were best friends. ive been forcing you to hang out with me for years now why do you THINK im being nice to you its bc i care about you asshole and then. like after another million years after letting me sweat it out over whether hes about to cry for like fucking years the asshole grabs my hand and says. i shit you not. ‘you know im in love with you, right?’ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PG: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YN: anyway hes my boyfriend now :’) dont tell anyone tho gotta win the bet
four months.
Lingering by the elevator, you glance around at the uncharacteristically silent office building, waiting for Spencer to leave the bullpen. The sound of his footfalls drawing nearer makes you smile and you mentally applaud yourself for suggesting the two of you remained behind after disembarking from the plane, taking advantage of the manufactured privacy to take the same car home, back to his apartment.
When he sees you waiting for him, he can’t help the soft fond smile that tugs at his face, as he reaches for your hand, sliding his fingers into yours with a gentle squeeze, the quiet of the building allowing him to indulge in the show of affection. You return the squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder with a yawn and as he presses a fond kiss to your temple he’s rewarded by a sleepy hum of approval from you that sends a rush of quiet joy shooting through him.
“At least we won’t be sleeping in hotel beds again tonight,” you say, voice weary, and Spencer nods as he shuffles you into the elevator. The doors slide shut and the elevator starts to move and in the moment of absolute privacy, you steal a kiss, tilting your chin up to catch his lips with yours, revelling in the soft huff of surprise he lets out, even as he smiles against your mouth. Even after months, the simple act of kissing Spencer still feels new and thrilling somehow, like you can’t quite believe it’s something you’re allowed to do.
His nose brushes yours and he breathes “unless something big comes up, we get a sleep in tomorrow too,” and the way you beam at him sends his heart racing in his chest, unable to look away from the fondness shining in your eyes.
As the two of you exit the elevator and make your way through the Bureau car park, you tuck yourself against his side, wedging yourself under his arm with a happy sigh, eager to get yourself horizontal and asleep as fast as possible. Spencer brushes his lips against your temple again as the two of you close in on his car, almost free and clear of the office when a voice behind the two of you brings you up short.
“Reid?”
Spencer is reacting before his mind catches up, turning on his heel towards the sound of Hotch’s voice echoing through the parking lot, conscious of the incriminating way you’re still tucked against his side, even as his brain is rifling frantically through any possible excuses for the current circumstances.
“Hotch-” you step away from Spencer, cheeks flaming, not wanting to chance a look at him. “I-we-thought everyone else had gone home,” you trail off lamely, trying your hardest not to balk under Hotch’s ominously impassive scrutiny. A second passes, then another, and the short silence feels like months, or years even as the three of you stand locked in a stalemate.
“I take it the two of you would prefer to keep this under wraps?” He asks, finally, and it registers with Spencer, somewhat belatedly, that Hotch’s tone isn’t admonishing. It isn’t enough to dissipate the tension coiling in Spencer’s muscles just yet, but he spares a glance at you as he nods, and a moment later, Hotch gives the two of you a curt nod of his own. “I’ll tell you what,” he says, a shade of irony colouring his voice. “If you two fill out the paperwork for in-team relationships for me, I’ll keep it to myself. I understand privacy is hard to come by in our office.”
The words take a while to fully sink in, and you’re conscious that you’re standing there blinking and gaping at your boss like a bemused fish for a good few seconds before you’ve composed yourself enough to say “absolutely, sir. Of course. Thank you.”
Hotch nods again, heading towards his own car, and as he passes the two of you, a brief smile flashes across his face.
“Congratulations, you two. Get some sleep.”
four months and three weeks.
Spencer isn’t sure how late it is, but he knows you’re not asleep yet, the faint glow of your phone screen casting faint distorted shadows across his room as your free hand rests lightly on his chest. In the dark blue twilight of his room, the space feels undefined and dream like somehow, the line between his mind and his surroundings blurry or indistinct somehow, and as you huff out a near silent laugh at something on the screen in your hand, a thought rises to the surface of his thoughts like flotsam on an unwanted tide.
The more clinical part of his mind notes the autonomic response in his body, the way his heart lurches unpleasantly in his chest, heart rate rising with an influx of cortisol through his nervous system, automatically rifling through ways to control the anxiety response. Age old instinct surges forwards, starting to push his spiralling anxiety down out of sight so as not to bother you with it, but then your hand shifts infinitesimally on his chest, fingers curling in the soft fabric of his pyjama shirt, and for once his body is miles ahead of his brilliant mind, your name is leaving his lips before he’s really aware of it happening.
Your gaze flashes up from your phone at the sound of his voice, soft and hesitant, and you let the screen go dark as you set it down. You can feel Spencer’s heart hammering against his ribs under your palm, and your brows knit together in concern as you shift closer to his side, tracing gentle circles over his shirt with your fingertips, the repetitive motion intended to soothe, though you’re not sure if it’s for his benefit or yours.
“Yeah, baby?” You ask softly, working hard to keep the rising worry from your voice. After three years of friendship and almost six months of dating, you know him well enough to sense when his propensity for overthinking and catastrophizing is slipping out of his control. You can feel his chest rise as he inhales sharply, whatever he’s about to say cut off by second guessing, doing nothing to pacify your concern. “Spence? Is everything okay?” You ask again.
“This-bet-hiding our relationship-it’s-” he trails off, throat tight as he rolls onto his side, facing away from you, and smushing his face into the pillow, already wishing he hadn’t said anything. You’re the kindest person he’s ever met, but offering up this kind of raw insecurity feels like pulling teeth. Even if it’s you. Especially if it’s you. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to find out if you care about him enough to stay when his racing mind gets the better of him. The pillow muffles his voice as he says “never mind.”
You feel your own heart rate tic up in response to that, matching the wild beat of Spencer’s that you could feel under your palm only a second ago. “Baby, talk to me. What’s on your mind?”
He shakes his head, face still hidden in the pillow. “It’s stupid.”
He can feel the rush of your breath on his back as you sigh, and your voice is almost achingly patient as you say softly “it’s not stupid if it matters to you.” There’s a long pause, and you press yourself against his back, settling close and letting your hand slide over his side to rest on his chest, the heat of his skin sinking into yours even through his thin shirt. In spite of his height, he feels so small as you wrap yourself around him, drawing closer, trying to reassure him without yet knowing what he needs to be reassured of. “Spence?”
“Are you ashamed of-being with me? Is that why you want to hide it?” The words are almost whispered, the sound almost lost against his pillow and your heart sinks, plummeting faster and further than if you’d dropped it off the side of a skyscraper. You should’ve known he might worry about that, should have realised it might have felt that way. Remorse rises hot and bitter in your throat and you swallow it down, trying to steady your voice.
“Spencer. Sweetheart. No. Never. I could never be ashamed. I love you. I’m so sorry.” Your arms wrap more tightly around him and you bury your face against the crook of his neck, the tension you can feel in every inch of his body making you feel more cruel and short-sighted than you already do. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise it might feel like that. I could never be ashamed of being with you, Spence. You’re my favourite person.” He takes the kind of shaky, shallow breath that comes with trying not to cry and your heart breaks a little more as one of his hands slowly moves to cover yours where it rests against his chest, just over his heart.
As his hand rests over yours, his thumb strokes lightly along your knuckles, and he knows you know him well enough to notice the way his hand trembles, just a little, because then your hand is shifting against his, turning to clumsily tangle your fingers with his, holding tighter to him as he tries to collect himself, drawing in a deep, shuddering breath as his eyes squeeze shut. He can hear the contrition in your voice as you say softly “I’ve never really liked having people know everything about what’s going on in my life. And I love our friends but-something like this, that’s so-special? So new? I wanted to be able to keep it to just us for a while.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice comes out a little shaky, scarcely more than a whisper, and it’s more than you can take as you pull back and gently force him to roll over to face you. He’s not crying, but his eyes are glassy and you recognise the fight to keep the tears unshed in the tight set of his jaw and the hard line of his lips. Leaning on your elbow, you lift your free hand to gently smooth out the furrows of his brow, letting your fingers linger along the planes of his face.
“Why are you sorry,” you ask gently. “You don’t need to be sorry, baby. Not for talking to me about things that bother you. We can tell everyone else tomorrow, if you want? We can call off the bet. Derek will live. If he’s got a problem with it I’ll turn all his shirts into crop tops.”
He can tell the joke is a last bid attempt to make him smile, to ease his fear, and it works. In spite of the anxious weight in his chest that feels like it’s pressing him into the mattress, Spencer laughs weakly, meeting your eyes, and he watches as a relieved smile breaks across your face, releasing your lower lip from where you’d trapped it worriedly between your teeth. The unmitigated affection that floods into your eyes renders him momentarily breathless as he takes in the moment. You’re still here, still trying to take care of him. Just as kind and steadfast as ever.
“No,” he says eventually, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you down on top of him like a living weighted blanket, letting your warmth chase the bulk of the tension from his body and luxuriating in the way you curl into him, one hand sliding into his hair. “We shouldn’t call off the bet. We still have to take Emily’s money, remember?”
Your sleepy laugh is the last thing he hears before his eyes close and the feel of your body wound around his lulls him to sleep.
five months.
SR: Can I talk to you about something?
DM: you dying or something? that’s a really fuckin ominous text to recieve out of the blue
SR: I’m not dying, why would that be what you assumed? I just have a question.
DM: just a figure of speech but what’s up?
SR: It’s about your bet with Emily. What’re the terms for it?
DM: wym?
SR: What exactly did you two make the bet about? What needs to happen in order for you to win the bet?
DM: does this count as collusion?
SR: Technically yes, but calling it collusion implies a certain degree of illegality.
DM: whatever anyway the terms i made with em were that you’d make some kind of move before your birthday but she reckoned you were gonna need some kind of near death experience to do anything about your crush why?
SR: I’m just making sure I have all the information.
DM: what’s going on pretty boy? you planning something?
SR: Maybe.
DM: not a helpful answer reid is everything good?
SR: Everything’s fine. We’re just figuring some stuff out. Nothing to worry about.
DM: is there something you’re not telling me?
SR: Don’t worry about it.
five months, three weeks and six days.
In the chaos that was the scramble from the briefing room to the jet, you haven’t yet had the chance to speak to Spencer about the outcome of his most recent thesis defence panel. By the time you’ve got a moment to breathe, the jet is underway, coasting across the country towards Montana, the whole team settled in for the six hour flight. You corner him in the tiny kitchen area of the jet as he’s making a mug of mediocre coffee, fingers tapping out an absent minded rhythm on the countertop as the coffee machine whirs, clearly not paying attention to anything outside of his head.
“Hey, boy genius.” He jumps, whirling around, eyes wide with surprise, and you smile fondly. “So?” You demand, and Spencer raises an eyebrow in confusion. You snort, rolling your eyes as you elaborate. “Your defence panel. Did it go okay?”
You’re shifting your weight and fidgeting restlessly with the belt loops on your pants and as he studies you for a moment, it occurs to Spencer that you’re nervous for him over this outcome. The thought brings an almost giddy smile to his face.
“You know this isn’t my first thesis defence panel, right?” He says mildly, deliberately burying the lede, enjoying the way you scowl in irritation too much to answer your question right away, too enamoured with this display of concern on his behalf.
“Don’t be difficult, Doctor Reid. It’s still a big deal.” He just shrugs noncommittally, and you huff, swatting his arm lightly. “So did it go well?” You ask again, eyes narrowing as you try to dissect his microexpressions, trying to discern the answer he seems determined to keep from you for yourself. A few seconds later, he relents.
“I can now add degree number six to my wall.” He confirms. Getting degrees doesn’t hold the same rush of pride for him now, the accomplishment feeling somewhat less exceptional as he acquires more of them, but the way your face lights up with pride for him reminds him how special the things he’s capable of can be. You’ve always made him feel like more than the sum of his parts somehow, like something infinitely more precious than he always assumed he is.
“I fucking knew it. That’s amazing, Spence,” you say, chest warm and full with pride and love, and his almost shy smile in return is enough to make a decision for you in a split second. Your hand dips into your back pocket, drawing something out, and you carefully hide it from view in your palm as Spencer tracks the motion curiously with his eyes.
Your eyes are shining with affection and something that looks like mischief and the way you’re smiling at him is more than enough to divert his attention as you step closer, just barely noticing as you slip something into his hand. You’re dangerously, distractingly close now, and he’s conscious, if somewhat distantly, that neither of you is concealed from the rest of the team, scant meters away in the seating area of the jet. But you’re smiling and close enough for him to feel your breath on his face and suddenly your lips are on his, and even after nearly seven months of being able to touch you like this, it’s enough to make him forget everything else as he melts into the contact, savouring the warmth of your skin and the faint smell of your shampoo.
You pull back a second later, the kiss over almost as soon as it started, but it’s enough to attract attention, and you can hear a belated ‘oh SHIT’ from Emily in the main cabin of the jet. In your peripheral vision, you can see money changing hands, your friends scrambling to react, but you don’t look at them, choosing to enjoy the bemused, affectionate look on Spencer’s face as his brain catches up to the events unfolding around the two of you.
“I was tired of keeping it a secret,” you say fondly, loud enough only for him to hear. “You win.”
Blinking in confusion, he finally tears his gaze away from yours, fingers uncurling to reveal the fifty dollar bill you had pressed into his palm right before you kissed him. The penny drops and he snorts with laughter, shaking his head in half hearted indignation as his other arm loops around you, pulling you in, letting you rest your head on his shoulder, hiding your face from the rest of the team as he kisses your temple, revelling in the way you wind yourself around him in response.
“I was gonna do this in like two days. I wanted you to win,” he murmurs against your hairline, and he can feel your faint laughter.
“Too bad, baby. I’m used to getting my way,” you say, pulling back to steal another quick kiss before peeling yourself out of his arms with a wink, turning to face the onslaught of ‘care to fucking explain that’ and ‘I fucking told you so’ from the rest of your friends, tugging him with you by your joined hands.
277 notes · View notes
farfromtommy · 4 years ago
Note
seb being a stepdad to chris' kids or vice versa!
Tumblr media
not my gif
a/n: okay this is literally one of the best ideas ever and im so in love with this fic. i think this takes the cake for my favorite fic i’ve written!! this is mildly edited so pls be kind. im so proud of it and hope you guys love it <3
please reblog if you enjoyed reading and and feel free to leave any comments!!
warnings: drinking, mentions of sex, brief mention of medical procedure(s), there might be some language i dont remember
word count: 4,400
masterlist
social media au masterlist
taglist 
~~~
Chris has been your best friend since elementary school and all through middle and high school. Everyone knew how close you were to him and how deeply you loved each other. It was never in a romantic sort of way, though. Nobody really understood the relationship you had with him, they just shrugged their shoulders and minded their business.
When Chris told you he wanted to move to New York to follow his dream of being an actor, he asked you to go with him. You shared his love for theatre and the arts and always wanted to see if you could make it as a big-time Hollywood actress. You packed all your things into your tiny car and made your way to New York with your best friend.
You spent your 28th birthday sitting on Chris’s couch with a bottle of tequila and a broken heart. Your boyfriend of 3 years broke up with you on the grounds of you being “such a drag” and “not someone he wants to settle down with any more”. You had planned a life with him. He talked about marrying you and having kids with you just weeks prior. And he had just thrown it all away.
Having gone through almost half of the bottle of tequila already, Chris took the bottle from you and just looked at you with sad eyes. He ran his hand through your hair as you buried your face in your pillow and just cried. You pulled yourself together after a while and willed yourself to sit up and look Chris in the eyes.
“I know I’m kinda drunk right now but Chris, listen to me. Can we make a pact? When we’re both 30 and if we’re both still single and loveless. Let’s have a baby. We don’t have to like… y’know… do it or anything. We can do it through insemination or in a petri dish or however they do it. I’m just- I want to settle down and have kids but I don’t think I’ll ever trust anyone else.” You rambled, gesturing wildly with your hands. Chris suppressed a laugh and looked at you like you were crazy. You just looked at him questioningly until he realized this was not the alcohol talking.
“Are you serious? Like, me and you? Having a baby? Seriously?” He pulled himself off the floor and sat on the coffee table in front of you.
“I’m so serious. You can say no, Chris. This is me asking you what you think. I always said that if I don’t have a husband or have been with someone long enough to have a child with them, that I would go to a sperm bank and do it like that. You know how badly I want kids, and I know you want them too.” You moved to the edge of the couch to move closer to him. He stood up and grabbed your hand to help you up. He dragged you towards the kitchen and sat you down at the table, telling you to wait there while he grabbed something. He came back a few moments later with a notebook and a pen.
“Alright, let’s figure this out. We’re going to ask each other questions about this and write down the answers. Any conditions we have we’ll write down, if we can’t agree on them we don’t do it. I know you’re not super sober right now so we can do this now and talk about it again tomorrow.” He wrote ‘Y/L/N - Evans Baby’ along the top. You smiled a bit to yourself and waited for him to talk.  
“I don’t want to be just the sperm donor, I want to be involved in everything. From the ultrasound appointments to picking preschools. I also want to be in the room when you’re in labor.” He wrote it down as he was talking and looked up at you. You nodded with a big smile on your face.
“I would want you as involved as possible. We would be co-parenting this hypothetical child. My turn. To keep this from getting messy, we should do it through a clinic. Me in stirrups and your swimmers in a turkey baster. Sex can make things complicated and weird, I don’t want to risk something going wrong between us and then there be a child involved. Insemination isn’t as effective but we can always keep trying if it doesn’t work.” You pulled the notebook towards you and wrote down your condition.
That went on for the rest of the night. You and Chris take turns asking questions about your hypothetical baby. You had filled up pages and pages of notes about what you both want, from how you would decide to tell your families to living arrangements to if you’d circumcise or not if it was a boy.
A little more than 2 years later you and Chris found yourselves at the dining room table of his Boston home again. The notebook you had filled just a few years back right in front of you, along with 5 pregnancy tests. They were face down on the table as you anxiously waited for the timer to go off.
“Alright, Chris. This is it. It’s been 5 minutes, we can flip them over.” You released a shaky breath and stared at the tests right in front of you. Chris grabbed your hand and laced your fingers together. You looked at each other before reaching out to flip over the individual tests. Seeing all 5 of the tests with 2 solid pink lines knocked all the air out of your lungs.
“Oh my god. They’re all positive! Oh my god, Chris!! We’re going to have a baby!” You both jumped out of your seats and jumped around the kitchen before hugging each other and crying. He kept thanking you and kissing the top of your head while you sobbed into his chest, soaking his shirt. There were lots of tears over the next few weeks from you both after confirming your pregnancy with your midwife.
8 or so months later Penelope Elizabeth Evans-Y/L/N made her way into the world and the arms of her parents. The world seemed to stop when you heard the cries of your daughter for the first time. You could’ve sworn Chris stopped breathing the second he laid eyes on her when she was placed on your bare chest. He didn’t even care that she was covered in blood and other bodily fluids, he swore that she was the most beautiful human being to ever exist.
He took a lot of time off from filming and working to take care of you both. Once you found out you were pregnant, you stopped acting for the most part. You knew that you wanted to be a stay-at-home mom, at least until she was old enough to go to school, and maybe then you’d go back to smaller roles that kept you close to home.
Chris had a hard time leaving you and Penny once it was time to go back to work. He held her close to his chest and cried at the thought of leaving her when she’s still so little. Seeing the extreme separation anxiety he was already having, you offered to go with him to set and find an apartment or house to rent for the duration of the shoot. This ended up being the greatest thing you could have come up with. Every single project that took him away from Boston, you and Penny were right there next to him. You and Penny followed him to what seemed like every corner of the Earth.
The weeks leading up to shooting The Winter Soldier were the most exciting for Chris. He had been training for months to get into shape and was really excited to have you and Penny on set with him. He had also been talking nonstop about working with Sebastian and Anthony again.
One night Chris came home with Sebastian and Anthony trailing behind him. Penny had gone down for the night and you were nursing a glass of wine on the recliner, watching whatever you could find on TV.
“Hey, Y/N. I should've called ahead, I’m sorry. We’re just going to have some beers while we watch the game.” He walked in and gave you a quick kiss on the cheek. You moved the blankets off your lap and stood up to greet Anthony and Sebastian.
“I don’t think you ever got a chance to meet these guys before. Y/N this is Anthony and Sebastian, guys this is Y/N.” Chris introduced you and you moved forward to give them both hugs.
“Sorry for barging in on you unannounced, we would’ve made sure this idiot called you before to make sure it was all good,” Anthony said, taking the beer Chris handed him.
“Oh please, don’t worry about it. He used to do it all the time when we lived in New York. Sorry, the place is a bit of a mess. Didn’t get a chance to clean today, I’ve had my hands full, especially with this one” You gestured a thumb to Chris and he sent you a playful glare in return.
You offered to put together some snacks for the game, knowing very well Chris couldn’t handle his alcohol without some sort of food in his system. Anthony and Sebastian offered to help while Chris snuck off to go see Penny.
“How long have you and Chris been together?” Sebastian made some small talk while looking for serving bowls in your kitchen. Anthony leaned against the counter and continued to sip on his beer.
“Oh, we’re not together. We’ve been friends since we were kids and we actually are just uh...” You chuckled nervously, not knowing what to say to his friends. Chris walked into the kitchen with Penny in his arms at that moment. Her head tucked into his neck, hands gripping at the fabric of his shirt and his arms under her butt.
“We’re raising our daughter together. They go with me wherever I go so I don’t miss anything and so Y/N doesn’t raise Penelope by herself. We’re co-parenting in the same house.” He said, looking at the tired toddler in his arms. Sebastian and Anthony both sputtered on their beers at the same time, not believing what they were seeing.
There was no denying that she was a product of you and Chris. Even with her sleepy eyes, they could see the bright blue color that matched the man carrying her. They saw the swoop of your nose and the color of your hair. They stood there just taking it all in.
“I had a bit of a crisis when I turned 28 after my long term boyfriend dumped me out of nowhere. It was one of those ‘if we’re 30 and aren’t married’ sort of things. We turned 30 and were both still single, so we had a baby.” You shrugged, looking over at your girl.
“And it works, being parents without being together but still living together?” Anthony asked, gesturing towards the two of you.
“We had everything figured out before she got pregnant. We had conditions that we both had to agree on before we even got serious about it. We were both very adamant about not doing it the old fashioned way so things didn’t get messy. It took some time to figure out the… terms and conditions I guess.” Chris laughed a little bit. Anthony and Seb nodded in understanding and kept looking at Penny.
“I’m happy for you, man. Seems like you both are really happy. How old is she?” Anthony walked into her line of sight and waved his fingers a bit, trying to get her attention.
“She turned one a couple of months ago.” You said and watched Penny pick her head up and look at Seb and Anthony, inspecting them a bit. Her big blue eyes landed on Sebastian and she stared him down before he gave her a small smile and waved at her. She was a little shy around new people and would usually bury her face in the neck of whoever was holding her.
To your surprise, she leaned away from Chris and moved her hands out to Sebastian. Everyone’s eyes widened as she whined a little bit when he didn’t reach out to grab her. Chris moved closer and told him it was okay and let Penny make herself comfortable in his arms. She buried herself into his neck much like she does with you and Chris, her tiny fists clutching his shirt. Her eyes shut immediately and let herself fall asleep in his arms.
The next few months went on more pleasantly than expected. Chris often had late-night shoots and training, leaving you with Penny most of the day. Anytime he knew he would be home late, he’d send Seb over with dinner or just an extra set of hands to help you with Penny. She knew you were her mama and Chris was her dada, then one day she had her Seba. Anytime you opened the door to let him in with her on your hip, she immediately squealed and started to chant ‘Seba! Seba!’ and didn’t stop until he was holding her.
Sebastian had brought up the idea of taking you to dinner one night to Chris. Even though you were a single adult who could make decisions on your own, he didn’t want to disrespect Chris at all. Chris never saw you as anything more than his best friend, it had always been like that. He was ecstatic when Sebastian brought up the idea of asking you out.
“I’m so serious, Seb. I think it’s a great idea. She talks about you a lot and really loves being around you. She’s going to say yes, I promise. Y/N hasn’t dated since we had Penny, mostly because she’s scared of what someone would think about her living with her childhood best friend who happens to be the father of her child.” Chris told him honestly. You weren’t interested in dating at all since having Penny. Mostly because being a mom was your first and only priority.
Sebastian let out the breath he was holding and ran his fingers through his hair, all of a sudden nervous about asking you to dinner. Chris clapped a hand around his shoulder and gave him a quick pep talk before sending him on his way.
The 2 years between wrapping Winter Soldier and starting Civil War had been interesting, to say the least. Everything Chris did kept him in the states for the most part. You and Penny were still trailing along with him, always loving the things you got to experience as a family.
Sebastian had found his place right in your crazy life. You had been unofficially together after wrapping Winter Soldier. He went off to do his next project and you and Chris spent some time in Boston with your families. You texted him most of the day, and he called at night to talk for a few hours before you went to sleep. He always said goodnight to Penny and she blew her Seba kisses through the phone.
He flew to Boston a bunch of times to see you, even if it was only for a few hours. You flew to wherever he was for a few days at a time, most of the time with Penny. Chris somehow managed to get you on the plane by yourself a few times and promised he would FaceTime every single night and would have hourly pictures sent.
On one of your first weekend trips out to see him, he refused to let you leave without making it official with you. He had you in tears at the end of his ‘I can’t spend another second without calling you my girlfriend’ speech. When he proposed to you he had said that the only thing better than the girlfriend speech was the one he was about to give. His ‘I can’t spend another second without calling you my wife’ speech knocked that one out of the water.
Neither of you wanted to make a big fuss about a wedding. You weren’t interested in the big white dress and the stressful bridesmaids and the whole cliche wedding things. Sebastian suggested getting eloped somewhere quiet with a handful of the most important people in your life. Chris’s mom, Lisa, had offered to hold the ceremony in her backyard. Knowing very well how spacious and beautiful it was, you and Seb graciously accepted her offer.
You kept your dress simple yet elegant, a beautiful white lace dress that ended mid-thigh, and complimented your body so perfectly. Seb kept it classy with a dark blue suit and light blue button-up that brought out his eyes, no tie, because who needs one?
Right at the end of the ceremony right as the officiant was about to have you say ‘i do’, you heard whines coming from Penny, who was sitting right up front on her daddy’s lap. You looked over to see her squirming in his lap and whining out ‘mama’ and reaching out for you. Chris made eye contact with you and mouthed ‘i’m sorry’. You shook your head and let go of one of Sebastian’s hands to motion to let her go so she could walk over to you.
Everyone aww’d as she walked over to you as quickly as her legs could take her. You bent down and scooped her up, resting her on your hip and wrapping your arm around her waist to keep her up. Sebastian made faces at her to make her laugh and keep her happy for a few more minutes. Your photographer had taken advantage of the incredibly sweet moment and had made sure to get as many shots of Penny at the altar with you.
When the officiant pronounced you husband and wife, you were going to set Penny down but Sebastian was quick to pull you both close to him and go in for your first kiss as a married couple with your daughter right there. Everyone cheered and Penny was mimicking the claps of everyone around her. Before he pulled away from you two he pressed two sloppy kisses on Penny’s cheeks as she giggled, which pulled some tears out of you.
No more than 15 people were attending the ceremony. You wanted to keep it quiet with just family and a few close friends. The reception, however, was anyone and everyone you could fit into the ballroom you had rented at one of the best hotels in Boston. All your guests had filled the room before you and Seb arrived. You nervously held his hand as you heard the cheers from everyone inside after hearing the DJ announce “Ladies, gentlemen, and nonbinary friends … let’s give it up for the couple of the hour, Mr. and Mrs. Sebastian Stan!!”
No one understood how you, Chris, and Seb managed to make your situation seem so easy and flawless. He knew that living in Boston was a must, so he bought the house that sits right behind the one you shared with Chris for so many years. He never wanted to get in the way of the system you and Chris had created over the years. Somehow, he managed to make things easier for everyone.
Penny’s first day of school was emotional for all 3 of you. You were all at your front door taking pictures of Penny in her school uniform that she looks so ridiculously cute in and the backpack that was way too big for her. She insisted on getting the Avengers backpack that “has my daddy on it!”
“Okay my love, it’s time for us to go to school! Are you ready?” Chris grabbed her tiny hand and led her to the car.
“Yeah daddy, I’m ready!” Penny said as he lifted her into the car and her car seat.
“Daddy? Mama and Sebbie coming too?” She asked him when he clicked the last buckle together. Right on cue Sebastian opened up the door to the free seat in the back and climbed in right next to her. She squealed in excitement at the sight of Sebastian buckling himself in the car.
Chris laughed at her genuine excitement and made sure all her fingers and toes were inside the car before shutting the door. He saw you lock the front door and make your way to the front seat. He noticed you put a few packs of tissues in your bag before setting it on the ground and buckling your seatbelt.
“Planning on crying today, Y/N?” Chris asked in a teasing tone. You swatted his arm lightly and scoffed at his question.
“Our baby is going to her first day of school, of course, I’m going to cry! I cried last night after I tucked her in, I cried in the shower this morning, I cried doing her hair.” You heard Seb talking enthusiastically to Penny, telling her about all the fun things she’ll get to do in kindergarten.
“It’s okay, I cried in the bathroom while she ate her waffles this morning.” You snorted at Chris’s confession and looked back at your baby girl, who was not a baby anymore. She was waving her hands around telling Seb about how excited she was to see her teacher again.
Chris and Sebastian watched from the car as you walked through the front doors of the school with Penny’s hand in yours. They had agreed that it might not have been a good idea to go in with her since they might get recognized and to avoid causing a ruckus. They both waved at her as she turned around and waved one more time before the door shut.
“Did you and Y/N ever think about having more kids together? If I hadn’t started dating her, do you think you would've had more?” Sebastian asked Chris.
“We never explicitly talked about it. She brought up wanting Penny to have lots of siblings not long after you started seeing each other. She felt guilty and thought that I was going to be upset about you and her maybe having kids one day, which meant I probably wouldn’t have anymore. I told her that this was honestly the best thing that could’ve happened because I don’t think I want any more of my own. Penny is all I ever wished and hoped for, and I got it. But since you’re together, she’ll get all the siblings she could ever want, and I won’t have to change a single diaper.” Chris nudged Seb’s shoulder with his. “You guys thinking about having one?”
“Yeah... Yeah, we are.” Sebastian lowered his head and smiled a bit. “With Penny in school and everything, it makes sense. She’s ready, I’m ready.” Seb sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He looked up and saw you walking back towards them with a tissue in your hand.
“I had the morning crying shift, it’s your turn.” Seb looked at Chris.
Just as Penny wrapped up her very first year in school, you and Sebastian welcomed Beverly Olivia Stan-Y/L/N into your family. Penelope had been so excited to hear that her mama finally had the baby she had been waiting so long for. You had gone into labor in the late afternoon and Beverly made her debut in the middle of the night.
Sebastian had called Chris an hour or so after to let him know that both you and the baby were doing phenomenally and that you were asking for Penny and wanted to see her as soon as you could. Chris chuckled at the demands you were making, knowing very well how the epidural and pain meds messed with you.
Early the next morning Penny had crawled into bed with Chris, crying for you and wanting to know when she was going to see you. It was still too early for them to go to the hospital, so he called Seb in hopes that he was already going to be awake.
A very exhausted Sebastian lit up the screen and Chris heard the soft cries of the new baby in the background. Penny’s cries turned into hiccups as soon as she saw Seb’s face because she knew she would be able to see her mama, too.
“Sebbie can I see mama, please?” Penny’s little voice spoke up. Sebastian immediately handed the phone to you and whispered that Penny was on the phone.
“Hi, baby.” You spoke softly to not disturb the baby.
“Mama when you come home? I miss you.” Penny wiped her eyes with her fists to get rid of the tears stuck in her eyelashes.
“It’s going to be a few days until I get to go home, baby. But you and daddy will be able to come to see me, Sebbie, and the new baby in a few hours. You need to go back to sleep and be a good girl for your daddy. I’m sure he’ll let you have some cuddles in his bed with him and Dodger until it’s time to wake up again.” Penny hiccuped and looked at Chris with eyes that mirrored his. He nodded his head and she buried herself closer to him.
“Okay, I go back to sleep with daddy and Dodger. I love you, mama. I love Sebbie, too.” She yawned out, her eyes blinking with sleep.
“Me and Sebbie love you so much, Penny. We’ll see you so soon, I promise” You blew a kiss to her through the screen and waited for her to throw one back. She giggled when you caught it through the camera and put it over your heart.
You, Sebastian, and Chris all watched with tears in your eyes as Penny held her baby sister for the first time. Penny had jumped right up in the bed next to you the second she walked into the room and told you about all the fun she had with Chris. Seeing your girls together melted your heart into a puddle. Chris couldn’t believe his little girl was so grown up and was a big sister. Seb thought about the night he first met you and Penny and would’ve never imagined that he’d be right here at this very moment.
Everything was so perfect and you never wanted to imagine your life being any different.
852 notes · View notes
kisekinodrabbles · 4 years ago
Note
Can we get detective Aomine, who gets assigned a female partner but from the start they're always at each other's throats. During an undercover case, reader has to be super flirty and Aomine gets all jealous and mutual confessions ensues. Maybe some sexy times at the end? :') Sorry if this is too specific, feel free to come up with your own interpretation! I'm such a huge fan of your work Sam and I'm so excited that you're opening your askbox even just for a little while!
ngl idk what im doing here but this is the last request in my inbox so i wanted to finish it haha pls enjoy (not proofread so excuse mistakes) - also my first time writing smut in like years so forgive me!!
Sometimes, Aomine thinks that if he isn’t a law and order professional, he thinks he might actually commit murder and hide your body away in some undisclosed, obscure location. Most of the time, you feel the same way about him. 
The two work in different divisions—Aomine in homicide and you in robbery. The two divisions have always been highly competitive especially given how much overlap you both encounter. Things can get territorial, but their teams are used to your snide remarks and Aomine’s verbal assault. It’s just the way the world works. 
After all, the two of you were in the same graduating class. You, a valedictorian by books. Aomine, top of the class by combat. It’s natural that the two of you are so competitive with your conflicting personalities.
The two of you may have also fucked at some point. 
��I’m not fucking working with her, are you kidding me?” Aomine spits out at his boss. Any other person would’ve been kicked out of the room or probably fired, but Aomine is the best detective in his division so Akashi would never do such a thing. For now. Aomine’s been wearing his patience thin. 
The red-haired man sighs, folding his hands together atop his desk. “Aomine, I understand you both have had your immaturity in the past. This, however, isn’t the time for such trivial matters. There’s a double homicide downtown during a robbery. She’s the lead for the case on the robbery end because they’ve been tracking a series of these.” Aomine opens his mouth to argue again. “No more buts. She’s already down there getting witness statements. Unless you want to be behind again, I suggest you get in your car and start driving.” 
He grits his teeth. Breathe. Don’t strangle your boss, he’ll probably kill you first. “I’ll take Wakamatsu.”
By the time he arrives on the scene, a crowd has gathered behind the police line, snapping pictures in the hopes of getting something Twitter worthy. He growls past all of them and ducks underneath the tape. “Where’s the officer that called it in?”
“Inside talking to the detective.”
“I’m the detective,” he snaps right back, knowing full well you’re already three steps ahead of him. And you definitely won’t let him forget that.
He marches past the thick front doors, Wakamatsu in tow. From a distance, he spots you talking to another officer. When he finally approaches you, he realizes that you’re in a skin tight dress covered by an oversized police jacket.
Your name slips past his lips. “Did we interrupt a hot date?” He smirks.
You whirl around, knowing full well the irritating voice that grates on your nerves. Aomine Daiki. “Unlike you, I have actual friends and actual plans on a Friday night. Did you decide to give your wrist a break for the night?” 
Aomine bites back, “Well, it’s not getting much rest either when I had my fingers knuckle deep in something tight and wet tonight.” Complete lie but he’s not about to lose this battle. “Not sure you know how that feels though.”
“If you’re talking about the pudding in your fridge, you might want to ease up on that. Doesn’t look like it’s doing you any favors,” you smile right back at him, knowing full well you’ve won this argument.
Aomine growls low under his breath, jabbing Wakamatsu hard with his elbow when he hears the snort escape him. “Brief me on the situation,” he tells the police officer.
“Well, uh, I already told this detective here—”
“I’m the other detective in charge for homicide. Now, you better fucking brief me before I tell your captain.”
The guy glances at you warily and you just laugh. “Told you he hasn’t gotten any in a long time. Come on, sugar, I’ll brief you on the way down to the vault.” You curl your finger in a gesture to get him to follow you and he sucks up his pride for the first time and do as he’s told. If he solves this case, he still gets the credit and you can go back to that sewer where you came from.
There are two bodies at the vault and forensics are already working to collect evidence when they arrive. “Your area of expertise, double homicide. Both are surprisingly the robbers. Four of them broke in, only two were seen exiting with money bags. No other casualties.”
“Fucking weird,” Aomine mutters. It’s not new for robberies to go wrong, but for two of them to die with no civilian casualty? That’s fucking weird.  
“Interesting, isn’t it?” You grin, seeming way too pleased considering there are two dead people in front them. “The ammo is the same as the previous bank robberies in the area. We’re going to assume they’re linked to the Red Dragon clan.”
“Fuck,” he groans, “I fucking hate those guys. Bitches to deal with. Hard to infiltrate.”
You flick your hair over your shoulder, grinning at him. He can’t help but draw his gaze to your neck, a very attractive neck. Now that he notices how tight that dress is, he can’t help but admit that it has been a while since he’s gotten any action. The curves of your breast defined so clearly by the fabric that stretches across the mounds, the flow of your hips, every dip and rise. Your exposed legs further emphasized by your heels. God fucking damn. He feels his pants tighten as he licks his teeth. Get it together, Aomine. 
Of course, the clothes do nothing to remove the memory of your nude body from his mind. He’s seen all parts of you some time ago. A drunken mistake that ended in a brief, but extremely satisfying night of passion. Your tight pussy wrapped around his cock, your nails digging into his biceps. He can still picture the sheen layer of sweat on your skin as he rams into you, your broken moans falling from your lips. 
“Well, lucky for you,” you start again, pulling him out of the hazy cloud of lust. “I already have someone on the inside. They’ve set up a meeting for me tomorrow night meet with the head’s son. I’ll try to get some information done.” 
“Lucky for you, I’m free tomorrow to be your backup. You’re welcome,” Aomine smiles, “Don’t fuck this up. I don’t feel like cleaning up after your ass.”
“I should say that about you, asshole.”
Aomine is sat in a dingy van just across the street from the bar you’re having your meeting. You’ve hidden your mic in the perfect spot, a location which you do not disclose to Aomine. However, he has a feeling it’s somewhere promiscuous that he wants to be aware of. They can see the restaurant clearly, their brat hacker Sakurai having plugged into the restaurant’s security cameras. 
“Shut the fuck up, Aomine. I can hear you munching on your stupid sour cream and onion chips.” You mutter into your mic before the guy arrives. You sip your wine and take a deep breath. This isn’t the first time you’ve gone undercover but it is the first time to have Aomine behind you while you do so. 
The detective looks down at the can in his hands. Sour cream and onion. How did you know? He sets it aside, bringing the mic up to his lips. “Maybe you should do your job better and focus on your meeting instead of listening to me. Why are you so obsessed with me, hm?” 
However, a man’s voice on the other side of the headphones has him straightening. “Good evening, I didn’t expect to be meeting a lovely lady like you tonight,” the sleaze says and Aomine can just imagine him kissing your hand. “When Tanaka said I’d be meeting with the right hand of White Claw, I didn’t expect it to be a woman.”
“Well, we are moving up in life, Mr. Ito.”
“Your good looks are certainly quite persuasive. I’m sure there are ways you can convince me to strike a deal.”
Fucking. Sleaze.
“Oh,” you laugh lightly, “what a flatterer. You’re not so bad yourself. I can imagine people fall at their feet for you.”
“Well, I am quite knowledgeable in more ways than one. Perhaps I can show you tonight after dinner.”
The two banter back and forth, trading flirty comments that puts Aomine on edge. You’re supposed to be doing your job and he knows that. He knows this is all an act but you’re a damn good actress. 
“Aomine, where are you going?” Wakamatsu’s concerned voice carries through the speaker.
You freeze. This fucker better not screw this whole operation up. “Well,” you say, “this has been a lovely dinner. I’m sure we both can come to an agreement without doing anything reckless.” 
The double meaning, a sentence meant for the man across from you and the man listening to you rings clear. Aomine growls, sitting back down petulantly in his seat. He was about to rage in there and start a war, but holds himself back. Be professional, Aomine. Job first, dick needs later. 
“The same to you. It’s been a pleasure meeting you,” the man smiles. “Are you sure you won’t join me for the night?”
Aomine snarls low into his mic. Wakamatsu shoots him a weird look. You let out a little giggle and he knows it’s meant for him. “No, thank you, Mr. Ito. I’m afraid I have other commitments to tend to.” 
When he knows it’s safe, he storms into the restaurant where you still sit, sipping your drink. Sliding into the seat across from you, he rolls his eyes. “Enjoy yourself?” 
He didn’t see when you were set up with the mic earlier so he also hadn’t seen what you were wearing. He’s almost grateful because he knows he might’ve lost it if he did. Tight ass dress, deep neckline that shows ample cleavage (he’s always a sucker for this), sultry eyes, red lips. God, all his favorite things packaged into one. 
Your lips quirk up. “The breadsticks here are quite nice.”
“Fucking hilarious. Let’s go.”
“Why the hurry?”
“Unless you want Wakamatsu to hear me fuck you, you better dump that mic and get your ass up.”
You lean back, narrowing your eyes at him. “I’m not sure I like your tone.”
“Trust me, you don’t have to like my tone to enjoy what I’m going to do to you.”
Licking your lips, you consider your options as you bring the wine back to your lips. “Fine,” you mutter, unclipping the mic from the strap of your dress. Aomine moves faster though, snatching it from your hands and dumping it into the wine. Before you can protest, he already has a hand wrapped around yours, tugging you up from your seat and into the back room. 
You’re stumbling in his manic rush, heels barely keeping up with your movements. “Aomine!” You chide as he pushes all the way to the employee break room. The space is fortunately empty and Aomine locks it to make sure it stays that way. “Can you please stop?! You’re such a caveman, I—”
He’s quick to shut you up, swallowing your words with his lips as they slot over yours. He doesn’t waste time, shrugging off his leather jacket as he licks your bottom lip for permission. You gasp a complaint, but he takes advantage of the situation to stick his tongue in, pressing it up against yours. 
All your worries fall away into a moan as he separates from you only to gasp for breath and pull his t-shirt over his head. With nimble fingers, he’s unzipping the back of your dress and yanking it down, leaving your top half exposed. Shivering, you’re about to voice your disapproval but your brain seems to stop functioning the second your gaze lands on his tanned body.
Aomine’s always been attractive. No one can deny. There’s a reason why he’s simultaneously the precinct’s most eligible bachelorette and most insufferable jackass. His confidence matches his skills. His looks live up to his brags. Hard lines and shadows are painted on him like a masterpiece in a museum. His broad shoulders make him look even bigger with his height. His jeans that hang just low enough to be tantalizing with the hint of a v that leads to the space between his legs. 
Your mouth dries up at the sight and Aomine smirks knowingly. You’ve fallen into his bed before, he can make it happen again. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”
“Fifth grade humor doesn’t become you, Aomine.” You scowl as he backs you up against the table in the middle of the room. He effortlessly grabs you by the ass to lift you up and onto the surface, the metal cool against your exposed thighs. 
“Did you dress up for me, doll? Knowing full well that this was going to happen,” he grins devilishly, bringing his hands up to shamelessly cup your breasts. 
It’s not as if you’re embarrassed for being so bare before him. You’re proud of your body and he damn well knows that. You let him fondle you through your bra for a little bit. “No, you animal. I dress for the job.”
“You tell me you wear this flimsy thing—” he teases the light coverage of your lingerie. The lace is sheer and barely covers your nipples, the material holding onto your breasts for dear life. “—for the job?”
“I do my job right, asshole,” you spat right back. “So are you just going to stand there or are you going to fuck me?”
A wide grin stretches across his face. The heat in his eyes carry to his hands as he works to unclasp your bra and let it fall to the ground. Aomine doesn’t waste time as you lean back on your palms, granting him full access to fondle and suckle on your tits. His tongue swirls around the sensitive nubs that have grown stiff in the contrast between the cold air and his warm breath. His teeth graze the sensitive skin hard enough to have you groaning in pleasure. His lips close in around them and suck. He uses his hand to tease and tug your other breast, pinching it to elicit that delicious whimper out of you. Aomine alternates between the two, making sure you stay warm. 
Meanwhile, you let your hand fall to the bulge between his legs. He lets out a small grunt at the initial touch but seems to respond favorably to the way you stroke the tent, nudging his hips forward for more friction. “Is that a gun in your pants or are you just excited to see me?”
“You’re so fucking ridiculous,” Aomine mutters, both humored and unamused by your comment. 
“Fuck,” you let slip as your fingers struggle to unbutton his jeans. “Your fucking pants. Don’t you live in sweats? You choose today of all days to wear your stupid tight jeans?”
Aomine chuckles, “Patience, baby. You know you like my ass in these.”
You do, but you’re not about to admit that. He quickly works off his pants, letting them drop to his ankles as he moves towards you again. While he continues to stimulate your tits, your hand begins groping his cock which is rock hard and peeking from the top of his boxers.
“God, I miss having this inside me,” you whine, pulling the flimsy fabric off and letting it pool on top of his jeans. “Condom?”
“You don’t want me raw? You know you want to feel all of my cock,” he grins. You throw him a glare and he just chuckles as he reaches for his wallet on the floor, pulling out a packet and tossing it onto the table. “But first,” he pauses, letting his hands slide down to cup your pussy, which is admittedly already drenched at that point. 
He hisses when he feels your juices drip and coat his fingers. “You’re so fucking wet, goddamn. How long have you been waiting for this?”
“When that robbery happened, I was about to get laid for the first time in months. So fucking sue me,” you snarl at him. 
“Well, I am here to please,” he wets his lips. He slips one finger in, sliding in all too easily. So he adds another finger and feels your walls pulse around him. He begins pulling it out before shoving it back in, repeating the measure to stroke your walls. He curls his fingers inside as he watches your face closely.
Your expression morphs from irritation to blinding pleasure in an instant. Your eyes slide shut, your lips part to exhale shaky breaths. Aomine seems to know exactly how to angle and twist his fingers to induce a heart attack. The sounds falling from your mouth are ephemeral, Aomine wishes he can film this moment so he can replay it over and over again. 
He pumps his fingers into you and ducks his head to take your nipple into his mouth again, tongue circling the tip. “God, you taste so fucking good. I forgot how wet you can get. Don’t even need lube to slide into you, huh? You’re already dripping for me.” 
“Asshole,” you murmur weakly, clearly in no place to retort. 
“Remember the first time I fucked you? God, you were so easy,” he grins, “you were so wet, so turned on already. Remember when I stuck my tongue in your pussy? Licking up your juices. You tasted so sweet.” 
Your breath stutters in your chest, hitching in your throat. “Fuck you, let’s not forget how quickly you came when I sucked you off.”
“I mean, the sight of you on your knees is enough to get anyone off, sweetheart.” 
“Fuck me,” you groan. Any rational thought has fizzled from your brain. The feeling of his fingers inside you is enough to consume you whole, overwhelming you in waves of rapture. 
“What was that?”
“Dickwad.”
He chuckles darkly, licking his lips again. “Beg me.”
“I’m not going to—”
Aomine yanks his fingers out, looking down at you, taunting you. He waits as you internally struggle with your moral convictions. Are you willing to give up your pride for one night just to get fucked out of your mind?
Easy.
Yes.
“Please,” you huff, “please fuck me.” 
“Please fuck me who?”
Your eyes find the ceiling, wondering what in the hell you did in your lifetime to have met the devil that is Aomine. Biting your lip, you lean closer to whisper, “Please fuck me, Da-i-ki.” 
The man is a sucker for you calling him by his first name. And to get what you want, you’re willing to play into his hands. Aomine lets out a low growl before ripping open the condom packet and rolling the thin rubber along his length. Your pussy squeezes at the sight. Just imagining what it’s like to have that thickness inside of you, fucking you full, has you on edge. 
He doesn’t waste a single second, pulling you forward and slowly positioning himself in front of you. He holds onto his cock, letting the tip trace your pussy lips, circling it and letting your juices drip onto his cock. Stroking the wetness along his dick, he uses it as a lubricant before he slides himself inside you.
When he’s buried to the hilt, Aomine leans forward and lets his forehead rest on your shoulder. Your pussy is so fucking tight. It’s squeezing and throbbing around him with the engulfing heat. He feels as if he’s going to explode right then. 
“Fuck, you really haven’t been screwed in a while,” Aomine rasps. 
“Told you.”
Aomine starts off slow, pulling out and pushing back in. With how thin the condom is, he can feel every ridge, every bump in your heat rub up against his cock. The sensations is enough to have his thighs quivering, but he’s not one to back down. He begins to pick up the pace, thrusting deep inside of you repeatedly. HIs mouth latches onto your neck, tongue lapping and teeth nipping to paint purple blooms upon your skin. 
His movements are building a bubbling pressure in the pit of your stomach. You feel your heart tightening with every move, your insides squeezing. The absolute pleasure that crashes over you has you breathless, your hands finding purchase on his arms. 
He mutters filthy words in your ear, one of his hands reaching up to tangle in your hair. He yanks back lightly, just enough to have you moaning. You like it rough, he’s well aware of that. He pounds into you relentlessly, hands keeping you in place as whimpers tumble from your mouth. 
“Fuck, right there, oh god,” you gasp, “fuck me harder. God, your dick feels so good. Filling me up so full with your thick cock.” 
“Keep talking like that and I’ll be tempted to come in you, baby,” Aomine grazes his teeth along your ear, hot breath kissing your skin. “God, I want to just fucking cream inside you.” 
“Better watch yourself, Daiki.”
Aomine grins lasciviously, sweat beginning to bead his forehead as he attempts to keep himself in check. He feels you tighten your pussy, walls closing in around him. “Bitch,” he growls. You know what you’re doing but he’s not about to let you gain dominance of the situation.
So his hands dig deeper into your hips as he fucks you harder and deeper, his cock pulsating inside of you on the brink of his self-control. “I’m about to come,” he says with eyes squeezed shut. If he sees your tits bouncing as he fucks you again, he might actually combust in that second. 
“Me too,” you panted, fingers scraping down his arms. 
With a few more pumps, Aomine spills into the rubber with a grunt. He feels you convulse around him, your entire body trembling in the aftermath of your orgasm. He can feel his come continue to leak from his cock. God, he hasn’t come this hard in a fucking long time. 
His heart is thundering in his chest from the impact of his climax. He slumped forward, leaning against you for support—also partially to feel your tits press up against his chest. “Fuck,” he huffs.
“That was good,” you admit to yourself, still breathing heavily as you begin fixing your hair. “We should do that again sometime.”
Aomine just laughs, huffing against your skin. “You’re the fucking she-devil.”
“Says the guy who’s fucking me in the back room in the middle of an undercover operation.”
“Dick first, job second.”
Wakamatsu looks at him when he walks into the precinct that morning. “You do realize the captain is going to kill you for fucking up that expensive mic, right?”
Fuck.
272 notes · View notes
shjapologist · 4 years ago
Note
pls share some of ur 600+ knowledge of s class
oh my GOD anon the amount of bullshit geunseo has been putting us through is fucking insane(S-CLASS SPOILERS AHEAD)
so first off, against everyone who has ever read this novel’s expectations, han yoojin and sung hyunjae actually have.... a healthy relationship going on now! there was some rly fucking good character development to reach that point, especially 4 shj, somefuckign how!!! i went from wanting this guy dead to thinking If Someone Doesnt Put A Ring On This Man In The Next Fifteen Seconds Ill Do It Myself on loop. all the time.
now with the power of (business)partnership han yoojin and sung hyunjae(jinjae 4 short) manage to embody every couple w too much pda that has ever existed in the history of ever. some highlights:
shj turning into hyjs sweets dispenser.
shared a bed once then never talked about it ever again
INSIDE JOKES. SO MANY FUCKING INSIDE JOKES.
that one time hyj threatened to bomb shj’s house if he continued to ghost him
hyjs terror of letting anyone close but still gathering the courage to reach back to shj.
shj taking up knitting
haha what if we were both in an improvised rose garden late into the night and i lighted both our cigarettes at the same time by setting a rose on fire between them with my lighting powers? haha just kidding..... unless..?
stabbing is peak romance
hyj’s giant array of knitted hot pink clothes.
haha what if you sat me down on a hotel desk and cleaned up my split lip while i confide in you about my grief over my late brother. haha just kidding. unless.
and what if you were the first person i talked extendly of my trauma with and you helped me work through it sometimes without me even realizing. jsut fuckging  gdikiddn
that time hyj lost all his clothes except for his boots and shj’s coat.
shj: if i don’t hold han yoojin-gun at every chance i get i will die.
kid acquisition
shj’s "do you injure him grievously at your own hands or let him go without hurting him and send him to very likely torture and possible death" dilemma.
hyj’s “i can’t believe he wouldn’t cut off my leg >:(” dilemma.
sexy wine pouring
actually, just general sky high amounts of UST.
there’s more. there’s definitely more but if i look for all of them ill b stuck here the whole evening. OTHER batshit insane things that have happened in s-class:
manifesting your inner cat boy
hyj shooting shj, stw and hyh in the head without flinching.
snapping loved one from berserker state trope, not limited to 1 person (sometimes that takes a very good die)
hyj getting kidnapped(again)
stw evolution from govt dog in dire need of vacation to dilf in dire need of a vacation
3 new kids in the span of 3 months.
hyj getting kidnapped(Again. this time worse than the others 💔 see “very likely torture and possible death” point)
grandpa figure acquisition(i am in love with him)
that one time hyj stripped in front of a whole banquethall-ful of people
hyj 🤝 stw “working on hating ourselves a little less”
han yoojin’s childhood sacrifices.
oh wow so turns hyj knew more people than expected pre-regression, huh?
both han bros’ childhood trauma dude what the fuck their parents were so awful im glad theyre dead
shj and song taewon went on frequent business trips tgt precanon so shj knows the most mundane shit about him like his favorite toothpaste flavor. just songseong things ❤
giving my most powerful skill to the person i hate the most right before i die in a doomed timeline because i want him to live a normal life when i never could. just songseong things 💔
SOME people are at a high risk of dying. are they doing anything about it? at some point they will have to. for now, are they sticking to recklessly making it WORSE? yes.
streamers are evil little incels, this transcends webnovel universes.
han yoohyun’s atrophied tolerating people who aren’t hyung muscles moving for the first time in...... for the first time! 
found family :)
i left out other p big spoilers bc i wasn’t sure if you’d like to see them, hmu if you want more details! im always happy to talk about s-class :)
214 notes · View notes
houseof-harry · 4 years ago
Text
Fuck You Too | G.D.
Part 2 of Hate You Too
A/N - surprise! why im posting so late, I couldn’t tell you but here we are. im so excited to share this part w y'all, and im currently obsessed with this whole story line at this point. pls lmk what you guys think!!!!! (and @vintagedolan​ is an amazing gifer and I will be using her gifs on everything I post but we knew I loved her from the start and anyways)
Word Count - 5.3k
Warnings - some nasty, some angst, nothing new
Tumblr media
Kacey described it as a glow.
You hated that, because that made everything seem warm and magical and nice. That’s not what you were feeling, despite the new pep in your step.
But how were you supposed to tell Kacey you’d slept with her boyfriend’s twin that you despised and now you couldn’t stop thinking about it?
The worst part was everything was almost back to normal the next day. He was making rude comments, you were rolling your eyes, and you were flipping each other off by the time dinner came around all over again. But something felt a little different to you. The way his eyes shined a bit brighter when you caught him giving you a death glare, the way you thought about your late night activities with him whenever he flashed you his middle finger, a whole new meaning associated with the action.
You hated that he was giving you these new feelings. So you decided to hate him even more for it.
Luckily, since your mini vacation you’d been able to avoid seeing Grayson. And you thought you’d be able to continue that streak tonight. You and your friends were headed to your favorite bar for tequila tuesday. You didn’t typically participate in something that sounded like an excuse for a frat to throw down during the week, but between your constant thoughts of Grayson and your stress from heading back to work, you were in need of a midweek drink. Or ten.
So you got on your best top, your cutest jeans, your hottest shoes, and you made sure your hair and makeup were both perfect. Tonight was about distracting, about your “glow” becoming sweat from dancing with your friends, and maybe even having an actual excuse as to why you were less uptight because Kacey was getting way too suspicious for your liking.
When you first got there, your spirits were high. Your friends were quick to get some tequila in you, and before you knew it you had that warm feeling all over your body. You had hope, you were feeling good and loose, ready to forget everything that had been haunting you for almost two weeks.
But then the Dolans walked through the doors, and it was almost like you had this 6th sense they were there because the second Grayson was inside, your eyes met. You quickly moved your gaze elsewhere, anger already flowing through your veins alongside the alcohol that was continuing to fog your brain by the minute.
You hear Kacey greet Ethan excitedly, and turn your head to see her almost tackle him down. It makes you giggle to yourself because as much as you had wanted to hate them at first, they were cute as fuck. They almost made you want a relationship of your own. Almost.
“Already drunk?” The deep, and now familiar voice of Grayson comes from behind you, already way too close for comfort.
A scowl makes its way onto your face as you turn around, finding him almost directly behind you. You have to look up at him to see his face, and he looks plenty amused with how much he’s already gotten under your skin.
“Maybe. Does it matter to you?”
He shrugs casually, looking around and smiling at the rest of your friends before looking back down at you. “Not at all. Just something I’d expect from you.”
You scoff, rolling your eyes and pushing at his chest so you can step away from him. “Mind your fucking business, Dolan. I don’t even know why you’d come to a bar when you know you’re not gonna drink.”
“Oh, so I’m not welcome to hang out with you guys? That’s kind of mean, Y/N. Does alcohol make you mean?”
The teasing tone of his voice is only adding to your quickly building frustration as you take a large sip of your drink. “You haven’t seen mean from me yet.”
Before he gets a chance to respond, you walk over to Mila, a more than annoyed look on your face.
“Fuck that kid,” you mumble, finishing off the rest of your drink in a few gulps.
She laughs, shaking her head at you. “Easy there, tiger. You’ve already had four shots and two of those. You wanna be able to walk out of here by the end of the night?”
You roll your eyes, putting your empty cup on the table. “Fine, mom.”
“Damn, he’s been here for less than five minutes and you’re already a bitch,” she laughs, her eyes going to Grayson for a moment to watch him talk to Jas before she looks back at you.
“Can you blame me? He’s unbearable,” you whine, a pout on your lips. You feel a bit childish, but you couldn’t find it within yourself to care. Grayson was a nuisance. A nuisance with a big dick. But definitely a nuisance.
“I think you’re literally the only one who feels that way,” she responds, her eyes clearly raking up and down his body, and you turn to do the same. The tight black long sleeve shirt defines his muscles quite nicely, and his jeans follow the curve of his ass.
You shake your head to bring you out of your trance, knowing yourself too well. Tequila made you horny, and you refused for him to be the one you wanted to spend the night with.
“He’s shallow, condescending, and straight up rude. I don’t get how any of you even like him.”
“You’re the only one he seems to be like that too, though. I wonder why.” Mila grabs her chin, tapping her lips as she tries to think of a reason.
You can’t help the anger that bubbles right back to the surface at her statement, though. That’s all everyone tells you. He’s so nice, and cares about others, and he makes people laugh and is a good time overall. It’s just you that he isn’t nice to. And they love to remind you every time he comes up in conversation, which is more often than you find necessary. They seem to literally swoon over him. You wonder if he’s fucked them too, and that’s how he has a hold over all of them. Maybe he thought it was what would make you like him more, but it didn’t fucking work and you despised how much of a cocky ass he was about fucking you.
So you do what you do best, and find the most attractive man you can. It’s almost laughable how much he looked like Grayson. He was about 6 foot, dark hair, beard, tattoos all over his legs, defined muscles, almost a Grayson look a like. But not quite. And fortunately enough for you, he was easy to woo because he was dragging you out of the bar not even an hour later to bring you back to his place. You hoped he was a distraction enough, finally no Grayson in site to continue to ruin any type of fun you were determined to have.
***
You were grateful that your friends so regularly opened their homes to you. It led to many nights spent at their pools, in their living rooms, cooking in their kitchens, that all created new amazing memories for you to remember forever.
And that’s what you guys were all doing tonight. You were at Mila’s pool, floating around with everyone and going over your weeks to catch up. That’s when Mila asked about the guy you went home with, and you decided now was your moment to finally brag about the man from the bar. He didn’t make you cum as hard as Grayson did, but he got the job done and you’ll be damned if you don’t let everyone know.
To be honest, when Grayson heard you talking, for a moment he couldn’t even blame you for fucking the guy and being so proud about it. But then he remembered it was you talking, and he instantly felt his blood pressure rise.
“His hands were just so...big. And his hand print was bruised on me literally until this morning.”
All the girls around you giggle, ignoring Grayson's looming presence as he wafted in the water closer and closer, trying to seem as casual as possible with his back turned to you all.
“Oh my god and the way he just manhandled me, he picked me up without even batting an eye. It was fucking amazing.”
“Ugh, you’re really out here living the dream,” Mila sighs out, a pout adorning her lips.
“For real, Y/N, you gotta give us all the tips,” Jas adds, a knowing smirk on her face. You roll your eyes before looking at the other girls again.
Before you can respond with anything, Ethan is announcing dinner and the girls are dispersing. You decide to float around for a few minutes alone, wanting the space before you’re back at the dinner table with everyone.
“So he’s got nice hands?”
You jump and cover your mouth, fear shooting through your body for a moment as you turn to see Grayson in the water with you.
“Jesus fucking christ you dick. How long have you been stalking me?”
He rolls his eyes, sinking into the water so that just his neck and head are above it. “It’s a small ass pool, I’m not stalking you.”
You huff, looking over to see all of your friends starting to get their food and sit around the table that’s blocked by the fire pit. You could see them, but they could barely see you. “Aren’t you going to eat or some shit?”
“Aren’t you?”
“God you’re annoying.” You decide to move and float on your back, closing your eyes so you can do your best to ignore him.
“Bet he didn’t make you cum as hard as I did.”
You groan, clenching your fists as heated anger shoots through you. Of course he’s right, but he shouldn’t know it. “You’re such a fucking boy. Not everything is a damn competition. But, if it was, he won.”
For a minute you’re met with silence, and you think maybe he’s actually going to leave you alone.
“Liar.”
“Oh my god,” you sigh, shifting your body to be upright again. You’re met with his smug face, muscles bulging as his skin drips with water from the pool. For a second you think about how he definitely looks better than the other guy would dripping wet like that, but you shut it down real fast. “First, you need to put your ego in check. This may come as a shock to you, but you’re not some god on earth. Second, stop talking about this shit while our friends are here. They don’t need to know shit happened.”
“Oh, don’t worry, I definitely don’t want them knowing I slept with the fake ass princess of town. I’m just saying it’s a shame you think you’ll ever get better dick than mine.”
“You are such a fucking asshole. Like a grade A, picture perfect image of an asshole.” You start to swim to the edge, over his antics. Your patience for him is thin to start, and he’s pushed your buttons enough for you to need another two weeks of not seeing his stupid face. You reach for the deck, getting ready to pull yourself out when you feel two large hands grip your waist, forcing you to stay shoulder deep in the water. You couldn’t stand here, but he could.
“Running away from your problems, like always?” His voice is right in your ear and you’re sure if you shift your head just a tiny bit you’d feel his lips there as well.
“So you finally admit you’re a problem?”
He chuckles softly, his thumbs rubbing circles into your hips. “Maybe. But you’re not much better.”
You cock your head to move farther from his, almost as if you’re considering his words. “Maybe,” you mock him, your muscles tensing as one of his hands slowly moves to the front of your bathing suit. His fingers dip in, quickly finding your clit and getting to work. You hate that your body naturally responds as you relax like putty in his grip, your legs spreading. “But at least I don’t have to trap random girls in a pool with me to reassure my fat fucking ego.”
He bites his lip, temporarily ignoring your words and he continues to circle your clit. He listens to your quiet whimpers as you do what you can to stay silent, both for the sake of not feeding further into his pride and to keep your activities a secret.
Soon your chest is rising and falling quickly and you’re grateful you’re in a pool because there would be no other way to explain the drips of sweat on your hairline. You can feel the fire in the pit of your stomach slowly growing, spreading throughout your entire body.
“Interesting you think you’re a random girl,” he mumbles into your ear before removing himself completely from you.
You gasp, quickly coming back to reality as your orgasm fades into the past, watching him pull himself out of the pool next to you. It should honestly be illegal how good his back looked when doing that.
He looks down at you, annoying ass smirk and all with his hands on his hips as he watches you try to process everything that just happened. “Going to eat. Or some shit.”
And with that he leaves you alone in the pool, cheeks flushed, pussy clenching and a whole lot to think about.
***
“You’ve got the new dick glow girl, I’m telling you.”
“Oh jesus, Kace. It’s not even 9 in the morning,” you huff, sitting across from her at your table, breakfast in hand.
“You have been happier lately,” Ethan chimes in as he watches you begin to eat the vegan french toast he claims will change your world.
You take a bite, shaking your head. “That’s not a thing, and even if it were I don’t have it. Haven’t had dick in a week.”
Although that’s technically true, your mind can’t help but go to the pool from a few days ago. There was no dick involved, but it definitely made you flush a bit. There was definitely no glow, though. If anything it was from embarrassment that you let Grayson touch you again. Or, that’s what you tell yourself, at least.
“Well you’re acting like you’re getting dick every night. Was it so good you masturbate thinking about it every night?”
“Oh jesus christ.”
Ethan turns bright red as Kacey laughs and you rub your face in your hands. Her accusations aren’t wrong, but telling her would mean telling them that Grayson was the one haunting you while you laid awake, chasing sleep but his body, his hands, his everything wouldn’t leave you alone until you did something about it.
“Oh my god, is it the feelings glow? Do you like the guy?” Kacey continues to laugh, wiggling her eyebrows as you make a face of disgust.
“Absolutely not. I don’t want to date anyone right now, and I don’t know anyone who I’d be willing to give up my single life for. Ethan,” you turn to him pointing your fork at him. “Good luck, she’s fucking crazy today.” You stand, grabbing your plate and walking towards your room. “Now I need to get ready, so stop talking about my fucking glow that doesn’t exist.”
The couple wait a few moments to hear your music blasting before Kacey turned to Ethan.
“God, she’s got it for someone. Think it’s the guy from the bar?” She wonders aloud, watching Ethan inhale what’s left of the french toast he served himself.
He shrugs. “Dunno. What exactly is the ‘new dick glow’?”
“It’s when a girl starts getting dicked down, but like actually dicked down, not just by a guy who has a ten second stroke game. Whoever the guy is definitely fucked her right, because Y/N never gets the new dick glow. She hasn’t made a joke about guys not knowing where the clit is for almost three weeks, which might be a record.”
Ethan scoffs, looking down the hall and then back at Kacey. “I know where the clit is.”
Kacey laughs, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “I know, baby. That’s why I’m dating you. You gave me the new dick glow.”
He smirks, crossing his arm over his chest. “Fuck yeah I did.”
“But that’s why I wanna know who it is, because Y/N deserves to be happy with someone who makes her happy. The only reason she got defensive was because I’m right.”
Ethan nods in agreement, thinking to himself for a moment.
“Is there a guy equivalent to the new dick glow?”
“Well, any guy who likes dick can get the new dick glow.”
“No, I mean like would I have gotten a new pussy glow when we started fucking?”
Kacey sits back in her chair, running her tongue over her teeth as she thinks before shrugging. “I mean I guess. Any pussy to a guy is good pussy for the most part, though. It’d have to be a girl they’re really into to get a glow.”
Ethan hums, clearly lost in his thoughts. Kacey raises her brow, sitting up to grab her fork. “Why, do you think you got the glow when we started seeing each other?”
“Oh 100%,” he nods, resting his elbow on the table to put his head in his hand while he looks over at her. “But that doesn’t surprise me. I just think Grayson might have the new pussy glow.”
“Really?”
“Mhm,” Ethan nods, now even more confident in his conclusion. “He’s just been more energetic than normal, and he hasn’t mentioned how desperately single he is since our beach weekend.”
“Who’s he been seeing?”
“That’s the thing,” he huffs, the frustration clearly starting to build as he racks his brain to put the puzzle pieces together without success. “I don’t know. I haven’t seen anyone new, and when he’s talking to his new soulmate of the month he doesn’t shut the fuck up about her before he even knows her last name. But none of them have ever given him the pussy glow, not like this.”
“Wow, the odds Y/N and Grayson get the glow at the same time? Maybe they’ll finally be able to stand one another,” Kacey jokes.
“What if they’re fucking each other and that’s why they’ve got the glow?” Ethan laughs, shaking his head before continuing to eat.
Kacey laughs with him at first, but then her face falls when she thinks about it.
“You said Gray stopped complaining about being single after the beach weekend?”
Ethan nods, looking at her confused.
“That’s when Y/N stopped with the hating all men jokes.”
They both sit there for a moment, watching each other.
“Nah, there’s no way. Grayson can barely stand to be around Y/N for five minutes. There’s no way she could give him the glow,” Ethan speaks up first, shaking his head.
“Yeah,” Kacey sighs, a slight frown forming on her lips. “You’re right. Would kinda be the perfect love story, though.”
***
2:53 am.
That’s the time your phone says it is.
And somehow you’re wide awake, Grayson haunting your thoughts.
You’re not sure if it’s the exhaustion or the way he seems to consume every part of your mind and body that has you opening your messages with him. There’s only a handful of texts there, all of them short. Your last conversation with him was from when you were out with your friends, but Kacey and Ethan had too much fun too fast. They needed to get home, and being the best best friend, you willingly put your ego on the line by texting Grayson to come get them.
fine.
That one word was staring at you, mocking you almost from the screen, knowing that despite how much love Grayson has for his brother, he was still barely willing to do what you asked just due to the fact it was coming from you. It made a small pang of sadness shoot through you, but it was quickly overpowered by anger, and that anger was only heightened by the fact that his snappy attitude and the way he was able to get such a rise out of you made you so fucking wet.
You’re snapped out of your thoughts when you see the three dots pop up on the screen in front of you for a few seconds before they disappear. You hold your breath, unable to move from the anxiety of being caught staring at these messages looming over you for no reason. It was probably him trying to reach someone else and he didn’t realize he was typing to you.
But then they pop up again, and for almost a full minute before they went away again.
You lay there, waiting to see if he’ll actually say anything to you, but the three dots don’t come back. The time at the top of your screen says 3:01, and you can’t believe he’d even be up right now. Hell, someone probably had his phone and was trying to text you as a prank or something.
But fuck it. You wanted dick, his dick.
you up
You press send before you can think too hard about it, knowing if you let one brain cell evaluate your decision, you wouldn’t have done it.
As you read the message back to yourself, you see why. What kind of douche ass shit was that? That’s something you’d expect Grayson to send you, not the other way around. What were you going to say after he responds? If he responds. What would you say the next time you saw him if this didn’t go as planned? What even was the fucking plan?
As you continue to spiral, your phone dings and lights up in your face, his name popping up.
what do you want
You purse your lips together, surprised by his response. First, the fact he responded and also by the fact he didn’t totally dismiss you either.
But how the fuck do you respond to that?
You decide honesty is the best policy, and at this point there isn’t anything you could do too make things worse than they are because they are already so fucking bad.
thinking about your dick
Shit. You can practically feel his ego growing from your comfortable position under your sheets, even though he lives almost a half hour away. Maybe you should start consulting your brain cells after all.
did you just fucking booty call me 😂
Great. Just more fuel for him to add to the fire.
no. it was a text and i didnt ask you to come over.
thats a shame
You sit there dumbfounded, his response confusing you even more than every feeling he stirs up inside of you. Did he want to come over? Was he thinking about fucking you? Did he actually mean to try and text you before and pussy out?
Ethan and Kacey were at the guys’ house, leaving you alone in the apartment. Realistically, you could totally have him over for a quick fuck without them noticing, as long as he snuck out and back in without waking either of them up. Did you trust him to be able to do that? No. Did you care about that more than getting fucked?
guess im going to bed
A double text from the Grayson Dolan himself. Maybe you weren’t the only desperate one here.
what would you do if you werent going to bed rn
if it were up to me id come fuck you
gonna unlock my door. don’t let k or e hear
You throw your phone face down on the bed as you get up, slight panic running through you. This could quite literally be the dumbest thing you’ve done in a long ass time, and especially sober.
But there’s no time to harp on that, preparing for Grayson’s possible arrival taking the cake. So you get up, moving to the front door and unlocking it before rushing back to your room to get ready. You do what you can to freshen up, changing into just an oversized shirt for easy access, and cleaning up the room, doing what you can to make it as nice as possible. He’d never been there before, and you had no interest in him picking apart anything before getting to what you really want.
Just as you’re fluffing your pillows, you hear the front door open and shut. Butterflies explode in your stomach, nerves you’d been ignoring unable to hide deep within you anymore as you anticipate finally seeing him after what felt like so long.
You check the time on your phone. 3:33. Only a few minutes earlier than you thought he would get here.
You turn as soon as you hear your bedroom door opening. His wide shoulders take up the majority of your doorframe, his white shirt tight across his chest, and his casual stance making you practically drool. And you let yourself enjoy, taking in his athletic shorts that show he is definitely not wearing anything underneath and he is also definitely excited to be there.
He chuckles, crossing his hands over his chest. “Did you tell me to come here just to check me out?”
The minute you hear his voice, your eyes quickly meet his, and his gaze seems to be burning into you.
“Dunno. Do you know how to do anything besides stand there and look pretty?”
He rolls his eyes, making his way into the room and kicking his sneakers off as he gets closer to you. “You and I both know I can do a lot more than that.”
“You’re gonna have to remind me, then,” you hum, a smirk on your face as he finally grips your waist, pushing you gently against the bed so that you have to sit in front of him.
“That shouldn’t be a problem.”
Your hands come to rest on his biceps as he grabs your chin to lean down and kiss you. His lips are soft against yours, moving slower than you expected. The kiss is sensual, slow and hot as he makes sure you can feel every part of his mouth on yours. You bring a hand to his wrist, the sensation of finally having his lips on yours making your head spin. You’d missed it more than you’d like to admit.
He begins pushing your body down so you’re lying on your back, your shirt riding up your thighs and exposing the warm skin there. He rests his free hand by the side of your head to lean his body over yours, his knees resting on the edge of the bed in between your legs. You could feel his hard dick against your abdomen and you moan against his lips just at the thought of finally having him again.
He pulls away from your mouth for a moment, both of your breathing a bit more ragged than before as you look into each other's eyes for what feels like the first time. It’s pretty dark in your room, the lamp in the corner the only source of light, but you can still see all the different colors and emotions that seem to be dancing behind his irises.
You lick your lips and pull on his wrist to bring his face back to yours and he seems to hesitate for a moment before conceding, meeting your lips with his again for a moment before dragging them down to your chin. His kisses along the skin there are lighter and quicker, until he is finally trailing them down your neck and finding the spot there that makes you gasp.
He pays attention to this spot, kissing and sucking until you’re sure there’s a bruise there, but you can’t bring yourself to care.
While he focuses on your neck, he lets go of your chin to drag his hand leisurely down your body and to the hem of your shirt. His fingertips dance along the skin just below it, and you feel the goosebumps quickly forming in a trail behind them. He pushes the shirt up slowly, letting himself enjoy the feeling of your skin that hadn’t left his mind since the last time he had been able to touch it.
He grabs the collar of your shirt from the inside, his forearm pushing the fabric up to completely expose your body while also showing some new skin where your neck meets your chest. He lets his lips drag down there, and you let out a breathy sigh of contentment.
“So soft for me,” he mumbles, and you melt into the way his tongue feels against your skin, his hand moving from your collar to your chest and allowing his finger to brush over your nipple
“Grayson,” you mumble, eyes closed as you enjoy his soft touches, but the warmth coming from them is overwhelming. It was caring, gentle, even nice. That’s not what you need from him, though. Not when you’ve already been so confused.
“Hm?” He hums against your skin, licking over the dark spot there.
“Gonna put a pep in your step or what? Thought you came here to fuck me.”
He lifts his head at that, his eyebrows quirked as he looks at you confused. “No build up allowed?”
You huff, assuming he’s only acting this way to get a rise out of you. He wants to hear how ready you are from him, and at this point you don’t care because you want to get your shit rocked.
“I don’t need the buildup, that’s some romantic ass shit. You’d know I’m wet as shit if you touched me where I know you want to.”
You swear you saw disappointment rush over his features for a split second before they harden, his jaw tightening.
“I wasn’t being romantic, I was just doing what I always fucking do!” He stands from above you, backing away as he rests his hands on his hips.
You sigh before sitting up, assuming he’s just throwing a fit and will get over himself to finally do what you’ve both been anticipating.
“That was some soft shit, Gray. Last time you literally told me all the things you hate about me.”
He groans and mumbles under his breath as he closes his eyes to collect himself. You lean back on your hands, amusedly watching him try not to completely lose his shit.
“Do you always have to be such a fucking bitch?”
His words make the smirk fall from your face, and they cut way deeper than you’d expect. You can see from the look on his face that he’s not teasing you, he really meant what he said. You’re not sure if he expected an answer, but before you can think of anything rational, your anger takes over.
“I’d rather be a bitch than a fucking idiot?”
“Oh, so caring about people makes me a fucking idiot?” Grayson’s teeth clench, his skin still red as his fingernails dig into his palms.
“No, caring about you would make me an idiot,” you do your best to be as nonemotional as possible, pushing the anger that is aiming to match his down while ignoring the implication that he cares about you. Of course, anger is a secondary emotion, and the fear of actually caring for someone you’re supposed to hate is what’s triggered your fight or flight, but that’s something for you to work on alone. Or in therapy. But not with Grayson.
He scoffs. “You know what Y/N? Fuck you.”
He walks around the room, gathering the few things he brought with him before slamming your bedroom door.
You let all of the emotional baggage of the past ten minutes take over, tears quickly filling your eyes as you mumble, “fuck you too.”
Read part 3 here!
577 notes · View notes
luminous-shifting-vibes · 4 years ago
Text
*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server
once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier
also x1000 longer than previous post
"ur satan is gnc af"
"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"
"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"
"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
"ohoho sexy"
"I am very proud of myself"
"himbo x edgy fuck"
"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"
"he has teefs"
"SQUASH"
"good for biting 📷"
"he's a himbo basically"
"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"
"bifth"
"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"
"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"
"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"
"crimes"
"tumblr sexyman"
"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"
"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"
"steampunk e-girl"
"steampunk tumblr sexyman"
"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"
"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"
"ARTIST SIGHTED"
"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"
"babby..... would die for him"
"honestly i probably kin him"
"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"
"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"
"Also :00 blonde friend"
"Let us all infodhmo"
"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"
"Nix woukd you like to joon?
"skitters away"
"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"
"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"
"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"
"Awkwardly watches in band kid"
"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"
"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"
"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"
"anyway heres my boi"
"emo"
"haha emo"
"virgil sanders kinnie"
"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"
"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"
"bird man my beloved"
"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"
"Birds!!"
"guiguhuh"
"crabrave"
"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"
"yess name collector gang"
"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"
"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"
"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"
"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"
"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"
"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"
"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"
"mmmmmm magic man :]"
"°0° green man"
"criminal (affectionate)"
"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"
"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"
"i would commit so many crimes for him"
"Very babey"
"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"
"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"
"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)
"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"
"* or extremly chaotic either works"
"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"
"oH--"
"bc my brain has a schedule"
"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"
"hehe yes spooky man"
"my ghost glucose guardian"
"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"
"ghosts r just inherently sexy"
"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"
"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"
"ł â m p"
"łæmp"
"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"
"I'd date a ghost"
"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"
"p e e p e e"
""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"
"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"
"you're all 12 year olds"
"PEENIE"
"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"
"god, what a himbo. i love him"
"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"
"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"
"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"
"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""
"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"
"twink appreciation club"
"give us the twinks"
"my first thought was bottom-"
"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"
"daddy issued"
"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"
"Big boy but"
"anyways janus is swagggg"
"........................."
"gib twink"
"give twink then i will share"
"holds him gentle like hamburger"
"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"
"he is. fragile creachur"
"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"
"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"
"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"
"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"
"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"
"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"
"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."
"note i am a lesbian"
"You may like Schezo wegey"
"why does he have one single expression"
"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"
"magic wand"
"I Want To Hold His Hand"
"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"
"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""
"p e a n u t"
"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"
"grug from the croods is peak male performance"
"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."
"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"
"i like essays"
"central time gang"
"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)
"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"
"points were made"
"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"
"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"
"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"
"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"
"several people are typing"
"do these look edible to you"
"forbidden gummies"
"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"
"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"
"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"
"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"
"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"
"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"
"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."
"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."
"NIIICE"
"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"
"watch your fucking language in front of the president"
"im so sorry lumi"
"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"
"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"
"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"
""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""
"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"
"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."
"me on discord: nick wilde"
"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."
"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"
"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"
"what the fuck"
"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"
"If you adopt me then yes"
"am I qualified for dad jokes???"
"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"
"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""
"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"
"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"
"cat pet"
"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"
"maybe thats me being a coward tho"
"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"
if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content
34 notes · View notes
toutallyahoe · 5 years ago
Note
Hey, it me, a dumb sleeby bitch. I know you're not taking requests. So I'm gonna leave this at your doorstep and if you ever want to do it, go for it. No pressure. But pls if you ever have time and motivation, could you give me some cute sleepy headcanons for any of our very good cowboys? Thanks in advance and I love you and everything you do. You're amazing.
i would literally write a fucking book for you-- i have told you this so many already asdfghjkl
but ya want some of the good boahs and some cute sleepy headcanons? BOI I AM IN!
also, before i continue-- CALL YERSELF DUMB BITCH AGAIN AND I WILL gently KICK YER ASS and hug you to death because ya ain't dumb or else i am more dumber than a fucking rock you sweet, talented smort, beautiful fecker!
AND ANOTHER THING !!! *sobs* HOW CAN YE DO THIS TO ME?!? SHOOTING ME WITH A SURPRISE COMPLIMENT-- ACK ME HEART! I FEEL M U S H ASDFGHJKKLXNBSOHD
okay, i calmed down now... onto the headcanons! btw, multiple characters because ya didn't specify who you want in this headcanon and because i knew yer beautiful ass would like more than one boah
⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃⁃
Tumblr media
Arthur Morgan
• first off, best boah right here
• second off, this bitch won't admit he is sleepy even if his life depends on it
• is it pride???
• probably...
• definitely
• i dont know, i see Arthur as one to not really say anything he feels because he doesn't want to be a bother or thinks he'll be a dead weight
• because life as an outlaw? it ain't really the best life
• so, when there are jobs that takes a few days and he volunteers to take watch, Arthur won't admit he is tired and would continue on be on guard no matter how many times he is asked to get his ass some rest
• it'll be a pain in the ass if you aren't patient enough or very worried about him
• because knowing Arthur, he'll just suck it up
• so, if he is sleepy, his [Name] is on his ass immediately
• "you need rest"
• "don't need nothin"
• he IS stubborn as fuck
• and also incredibly more sassier when he is sleepy
• it honestly sometimes annoy [Name]
• "Arthur, you look like you're goin to pass out-- jesus christ! just rest already!"
• Arthur is too stubborn for his own good
• and it sometimes lead to some arguments really
• but [Name] will be the first to give up when he just sees Arthur and sighs
• [Name] will sit by his side and just talk about stuff
• trying to make Arthur relax and at ease
• he'll be sassy at first but will ease up and comment genuinely
• Arthur will then unconsciously place his head on his [Name]'s shoulder as the [Hair color] haired man's voice drowns his thoughts with stories of the past (either his or [Name]'s past)
• before you know it, Arthur "sleep is for the dead" Morgan is fucking asleep
• [Name] notices how quiet Arthur and will turn his head to see the outlaw asleep
• [Name] just smiles at Arthur and place his head on Arthur's and let a content sigh as he close his eyes
• they'll be fine sleeping for a bit
Tumblr media
John Marston
• best greasy dumbass raccoon looking ass bitch
• but-- ahem
• like Arthur, John will be stubborn at first
• it's pride and John doesn't want to get babied really
• he already gets that enough from the rest of the gang since he is a real life predatory bait and gets mauled by a lot of animals
• honestly, this man has the shittiest luck
• but also lucky in some way...?
• but yeah... ANYWAYS
• when John gets tired, he is functioning with no braincells (like he doesn't already)
• [Name] is honestly tired with it
• just fucking glaring the shit outta that greasy raccoon boi
• then maybe...just maybe, you can get him to rest his greasy ass
• John will be a bit of a whiny bitch to be honest
• like, he'll whine he ain't sleepy
• but as if it was on cue, he'll yawn
• John looking a bit embarrassed and [Name] looking at him with that "really?" look
• [Name] ain't dealing with yer bullshit raccoon boi
• i can definitely see [Name] restraining John from running away and carry the guy to his tent and slam his in the cot and glare and order John to stay and sleep like a damn dog
• John would be honestly pissed because DAMN IT [NAME]! YA HAVE TO DO THAT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE?!? ARTHUR AND SEAN AIN'T GOING TO LIVE THIS DOWN (because those two are bastards... lovable bastards though asdfgghjkl)
• but also turned on but pfft-- he won't admit that
• but yeah, [Name] just sitting on the side of his bed and will not leave until he makes sure John rest
• "you ain't leavin, are you?"
• "i aint leavin till i see yer ass sleep, Marston"
• yikes, getting called his by his last name? usually his [Name] does that when he is annoyed or angry at time
• that when John know he ain't getting out of this
• "aight... fine! i'll sleep! happy?"
• "very"
• to be honest, John feels happy when [Name] does that
• it's because this is how his [Name]'s care for him and it is sweet
• a bit annoying but sweet
• John sleeps and [Name] softly sighs and place a soft kiss on John's forehead and leaves the tent to do his work
Tumblr media
Leonard "Lenny" Summers
• pure child
• pure child who can never do anything wrong
• just, this fucking boah is pure child who can never do anything wrong and y'all can fight me is ya say he aint
• ANYWAYS
• Lenny is adorable when he is sleepy
• just utterly adorable as fuck and his [Name] just smiles at how cute he is
• like, Lenny is reading a book under a tree and the day was just a lovely day despite it being so fucking boring
• Lenny planned to read but as the calm breeze pass by him, it didn't take long for Lenny to be yawning and his eyelids dropping but the young man is trying so hard to fight the sleep off and stay awake
• honestly, [Name] saw Lenny sleepy but being too stubborn to admit defeat with sleep will try to stay awake
• [Name] is just amused by it and found it adorable
• always adorable with Lenny
• but anyways, Lenny would be one of the submissive out of everyone if you ask him to go to sleep when he is tired
• will literally not fight back on it because his mind shuts down from the sleepiness
• honestly? will act like a baby
• because he is a baby and [Name] loves him so much and spoils him
• "come on Lenny, let's get ya to yer cot"
• "hmmm, [Name]? can you carry me there... please?"
• just adorable akdbjqjdjsjfjjsjd
• me baby
• aNYWAYS
• Lenny is just a good boah
• like, he gives up rather quickly because he knew his [Name] is looking out for him and besides, if he says yes? he gets cuddles
• so yeah, that's good for him
• Lenny gets warm cuddles and sleeps well in the arms of his [Name] who holds him very close and just being soft boahs
Tumblr media
Sean MacGuire
• loud and dumb irish bastard who stole me heart
• i adore him asdfghjkl
• but ON TO THE HEADCANONS
• Sean is a whiny loud ass bitch when he is sleepy
• he acts like he seems drunk
• and it is both hilarious and tiresome for [Name] because he is the one dealing with this shit
• i can see Sean just clinging to his [Name] and yelling on the top of his lungs on how tired he was
• and his [Name] rubbing his temple and tell Sean to get to bed then
• "[Name]! there ye are ye beautiful fecker! i have been looking all over fer ye"
• "and why is that?"
• "i'm sleepyyy"
• "then rest Sean"
• "but i dont want to!"
• honestly acts like a kid
• a loud ass bratty kid...
• it's not even cute
• kinda
• okay, [Name] finds it adorable but he ain't telling no one shit because he already suffers from a sleepy Sean who acts like a drunk toddler
• he doesn't want to deal with everyone teasing him on being soft with his drunk toddler lover
• but yeah
• like John, i can definitely see [Name] try to restrain this dumb bastard
• probably had to hoagtie Sean if i had to be honest
• which may or may not have the sleepy minded Sean blurt out something that made [Name] exasperatedly sigh and a bit flustered
• because-- goD DAMN IT SEAN! stop being a thirsting bastard for a bit and get some sleep?!?
• "Sean, keep this up and I'm goin to hoagtie you..."
• "that's a bit kinky [Name]-- but yer boy is always happy to please ye--"
• "oh my lords-- Sean!"
Tumblr media
Charles Smith
• stronk hunt boah
• he is just so beautiful-- im gonna cry asdfgghjkl
• bUT ANYWAYS
• Charles won't admit it outloud when he is sleepy
• he is usually reserved and quiet anyways so his [Name] has to pick up some signals when Charles is sleepy
• but Charles won't be so stubborn about it though
• like, he is kinda like Lenny, a bit submissive and giving in on his [Name]'s words if the man tells him to sleep
• well, if [Name] finds out he is sleepy that is
• when this boah is sleepy, he usually sits in a somewhere in a shade and looks at the sky
• preferably under a tree and away from camp for a bit because honestly, the camp is just too noisy at times
• so yeah
• [Name] will notice him not doing anything and just cloud watching and will sit by him
• Charles would send him a small smile and a nod
• the two would just be quiet and after sometime, Charles would lay his head on [Name]'s lap as the [Hair color] haired man braids his hair and then undoing it again, repeatedly doing the action for a bit
• it honestly soothes Charles a lot
• just his [Name] playing with his hair which he is the only who can
• it was nice and with him already be sleepy, Charles would be lull to sleep
• and with that, Cahrles is softly snoring in his [Name]'s lap as the [Hair color] haired man undoes the braid again and then look at Charles' sleeping face fondly then look at the view in front of him with a gentle smile
• it doesn't take long for [Name] to sleep too with that
Tumblr media
Javier Escuella
• a man after me own heart
• honestly, this man is just gorgeous asdfghjkl
• BUT BACK TO HEADCANONS
• Javier would probably be the only one who ACTUALLY goes to his tent and sleep in his cot
• maybe drag [Name] there because the mexican just want a nice cuddle you know?
• honestly, sleepy Javier is adorable to his [Name]
• Javier's mind just shuts down and he forgets how to speak in english and mumbles in spanish until he falls asleep
• i can also see Javier being one to plop himself down on his [Name]'s lap when the guy is sitting somewhere (below a tree or on a seat) because when is sleepy-- he loses his braincells and all functioning
• Javier just searches for his [Name] and throws himself because one, his boah can carry him alright anyways and two, he just loves too
• his [Name] is honestly amused because Javier won't be like this when he is functioning well
• well, not all the time
• but yeah
• [Name] thinks it's cute and will hug his lover
172 notes · View notes
i-dont-want-your-hysteria · 5 years ago
Text
The Leppard Albums: A Summary
(inspired by Every Beatles Album)
Happy Saturday night everyone
The Def Leppard EP
Joe is 19 and just wants to ride a motorcycle okay
Groupie fantasy
Zeppelin lyrics meet Rush with an underappreciated bass line
On Though the Night
IT'S!!! ROCK!!! N ROLL!!! BABEY!!!
Joe is 20 and just really doesn't wanna work in a factory anymore okay
pls D; girl D; stop D; hiding D; your D; pain!!
another... groupie fantasy... I think? ...???
Leppard in Space
Joe is 20 and just wants to write something edgy okay leave him alone
STEVE 👏👏👏 FUCKING 👏👏👏 CLARK!!!! 👏👏🔥👏🔥👏👌👌
the original groupie fantasy but it's been re-recorded
girl?? make up?? your mind???
let's be mysteriously edgy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Zeppelin lyrics meets Rush but it's been re-recorded (but don't worry they still kept the underappreciated bass line)
High N Dry
everyone in this band is a slutty bottom and this is the song that proves it
we have Mutt Lange now and this is the song that proves it
drONK TIEM
betcha didn't think we could write a ballad, did ya ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
STÊVË!!!!! 👏👏👏👏 FÜCKÎÑ!!!!!! 👏👏👏👏👏 C L Ã R K!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥👏👌👌🤙👏👌🔥👌🎉🎉
underappreciated and that's all there is to it
noooo don't go you're too mysterious and sexy hahhaha
oh god Dx oh god no Dx we don't sound like this anymore we swear Dx
betcha thought we stopped writing Beowulf-esque pop songs didn't ya ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
🚫🚫⛔👎🚫🙅‍♂️👎🚫⛔🙅‍♂️⛔ *Joe tearing his throat up for 2 solid minutes*
Pyromania
IT'S ROCK!!!!!! N ROLL!!!! BABEY!!!!!!!1!!!!1!!1!! AGAIN!!!!! 😆😆😆
the Classic Rock Fandom™ in a nutshell 😓
INTRODUCING PHIL 👌👌👌 FUCKING👏👏 COLLEN 🔥🔥🔥
betcha thought we abandoned the idea of doing a ballad didn't ya ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Joe's back at it again with the edgy songs and is getting a lot better at it too
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ∆ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Gunter 🙃 Glieben 🙃 Glauchen 🙃 Globen
the most underappreciated song on this whole entire fucking list sorry I don't make the rules
Alright, WHO in this band wants to be in a porno >:C
Joe's back at it yet again with the edgy songs but it's even BETTER this time
Hysteria
Girls Girls Girls ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS ANAKIN
🎸we!!! fucking!!! love!!!! glam rock!!!!!! and african drum rhythms!!!!!!!!!🥁
we're not furries we swear we're just kinky D: also fuck you DJs here's some false endings
we haven't made a ballad that HURTS yet so here we go (with an underappreciated bass line)
the song that invented "( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)" (AKA when you cram for a test the minute before and end up getting 100%)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)😏( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)😏( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
S T E V E 😭👏👏 F U C K I N 😭😭😭 C L A R K 👏👏👏😭👏😭
nooo don't shoot me you're too kinky hahaha
a song about rioting and being #punk, but the only crime the man singing it has ever committed was getting a speeding ticket when he was 19/20
oh. oh shit. oh god. holy shi- I can't believe... ...we just accidentally made the most perfect song to ever exist :o like seriously- people are achieving nirvana as we speak I'm not joking I think we went too far with the perfection this time guys
THIS SONG IS ABOUT S E X AND WE AIN'T BEING SHY ABOUT IT EITHER LET'S FUCKIN GO BABE-
Don't 👏 give 👏 me 👏 love 👏
Adrenalize
gkKLglldlflhlADKSLALLFLSS 😆😆😆
I fucking love my wife uWu
fkKMglgllsLLslgflephpGLDLPT 😆(͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)😆
We're just gonna get extremely romantic and passionate for 4 minutes and 3 seconds if that's alright with you (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)
this album was the most painful thing any of us have ever had to do, so here's the most serious song we've ever done to date. Steve ✊ Fucking ✊ Clark ✊ -n-
now that our mental breakdown is over, we're gonna get extremely passionate and romantic again but for a lil longer this time aiight 🤙
one of us has a protection/ownership kink but we're not gonna tell you who
you know what this album needs? a little bit more pain
we're layin down the line (and by that we mean we want sex)
we're layin down the line pt.2 (we still want sex btw)
Retro Active
Beowulf songs are back babey 🤙
I'll say that again if I have to^
we!!! still!!! fucking!!! love!!!! glam rock!!!!! we even covered something to prove it!!!!!!
Joe has now officially mastered ballads
I fucking love my wife part 2: she's a badass top
While Joe was off mastering ballads, Phil studied the blade
We covered something else bc again!!! we fucking!!! love!!! glam!!!
We rewrote Joe's motorcycle song bc we now realize it was cringe af (and it was an excuse for Joe to talk to Ian Hunter so that made him happy)
Joe has now officially mastered edgy/serious songs
it's a total bop but oh god. No. Please. No. Oh God. No. Don't. Please. No. Pls. No. Oh god. Don't.
This should've been on Adrenalize and you can Fight Me On That
Phil studies the blade (electric version)
Joe masters ballads (electric version)
Vault (there's only one new song on here so that's all I'm doing)
babe nooooo D';
Slang
Epic edgelords part 1
Epic edgelords part 2: Phil wrote it this time
everyone in this band is a slutty bottom and this is the song that proves it Volume 2: Electric Bugaloo
soft breakdown :'c
hOT DOGGITY DAMN JOE'S VOICE HOLY HELL TAKE ME N- *clears throat* I mean introducing Vivian Campbell :3 aND THERE'S A BASS SOLO MMMM 🤤🤤👌 THIS SONG IS JUST SEXY FUCKIN LIFT ME UP AND-
Phil's marriage isn't going too well
in fact, no one's marriages are going too well
severely underrated bop
We're still not over Steve's death and we never will be :c
Joe makes edgy ballads his bitch yet again 👏👏
severely underrated banger 🔥🔥🔥
Euphoria
wE STILL MAKE FAST BOPS IN CASE YOU FORGOT 🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘
Holy shit I didn't know Joe could hit a note that high
The 90s sucked for us but we'rE STILL HERE BICH 🖕
Can we pls give Sav more songwriting space on albums thx 😭💗
everyone in this band is a slutty bottom and this is the song that proves it Volume 3: Even Sluttier This Time 😏
totally different from everything we've ever done and WE 👏 MADE IT 👏 OUR 👏 EDGY 👏 BITCH
uwu but it's sad so it's actually umu
partying like it's 1999- oh wait, it actually is 1999
*hugs Viv and scREEEEEEEEAAAMMS*
Phil studied the blade and attacks you with it
*gets escorted into the back of a police car* IM GUILTY!! I'M GUILTY!!! I'M NOT INNOCENT!!! 😫😫😫
whatever edginess we couldn't fit into Paper Sun we put into this song instead
we're entering the new millennium as Kings and there's nothing you can do about it 👑🖕
X (Ten)
Stand on a balcony at sunset when you listen to this one
(insert Vizzini saying "INCONCEIVABLE" here)
the big UwU
I got ghosted and it’s actually a lot more dark and depressing than I thought also I wish I was never awake
soft and edgy and sad acoustic dads
F-U-C-K SPELLS F- I mean L-O-V-E spells love uWu
babe nOOOooO I'm sorry I suck so much DD;
this sounds like out if Work It Out and Day After Day had a kid
we're gonna have a Funky Good Time whether you like it or not 😎
E D G E L O R D S 2 0 0 2
we can't decide if we want this album to be edgy or uwu so we're gonna make it both
the same passion as Tonight but less sexy and more (you guessed it) uwu
E D G E L O R D S 2 0 0 2 P A R T 2
Betcha thought our emo phase was over didn't ya ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Yeah!
bops have been and will ALWAYS be something we have mastered- even if the song we're playing isn't ours
SAV'S TIME TO SHINE
betcha thought we couldn't cover a Blondie song, did ya ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Phil's just getting nostalgic about London it's fine 👍
don't worry joe's still sCREAMIN
in which we make this song a million times better than the original
WE LOVE ROXY MUSIC SO MUCH WE CANTEXPLAINWEJUSTLOVEHEMRMFLGPHPH
we're letting Joe have his moment ok just let him have this 👨‍🎤
yeah we like Free- so whAT??
okay NOW we're letting Joe have his real moment- he's been waiting for this moment ever since he was like 12 okay just. let him. have this just. this one time. pls.
in which we confuse literally everyone by making them think this is a song that we wrote
we just need ONE more bop, okay? Just ONE more we swear then we'll stop being fanboys (for now...)
we'll be right back, it's Bow Down To Thin Lizzy Hour
*Phil tearing up his throat for 4 and a half solid minutes*
Songs From The Sparkle Lounge
this one's actually kinda dark and heavy? :o
honky tonk time 🤠🤙
FINALLY ONE OF SAV'S SONGS IS THE MOST POPULAR SONG OFF AN ALBUM 🙏🙏🙏🙏😩
FINALLY WE HAVE MORE SAV MATERIAL I LOVE IT SM ;∆; !!!!
Phil's songs are severely underrated tho pls give them more attention
it's time for one (1) badass religious song and if you don't like it then you can Fuck Off kindly 🙃
This whole album is "Songs That Were Written By Phil and Viv and Sav" heaven
I think sometimes people forget that we, even as a band, are fans of the Classic Rock Fandom™ too, and we feel the same pain as the other fans :'^)🤙
Joe's three minutes of fame on this album
Joe's three minutes of fame on this album part 2
Viv's songs are severely underrated tho pls give them more attention
Mirror Ball (bonus tracks)
we grabbed fate by the balls and screamed fUCK YOU 🖕🖕
We are still Kings™ in case anyone was wondering 👑🖕
✨PHIL BELIEVES!!!! IN!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!! AND!!!!!!!!!! BELIEVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!✨
Def Leppard (Self Titled 2015)
Is this song about playing a live show? Probably. Is it also about having a fight? Is it also about angry sex? The world may never know.
Okay this one just absolutely SLAPS, periodt.
bootleg Another One Bites The Dust
*SOBBING* THEY'RE ALL SINGING LEAD I'M-
being badass, That's The Power Of Love
don't worry, we still know how to be Poetically Edgy
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii'm *bump bump* hooked on a feeeeling
I've Got a Spiritual Romantic Boner
Can't Keep Away From The Flame edginess gets crossed with some Zeppelin charm and badassery
someone in this band is fucking piSSED 😠😠😠😠
we're gonna @ someone tonight fellas
sAV OH MY GOD BABYYYYY 😰😰😭😭😭😭 DO YOU NEED A HUG
what if we tried to cross newer Metallica with Nickelback 🤔
what if we turned this into We All Need Christmas three years from now... 🤔
Bonus: Personal Jesus/We All Need Christmas
Viv really wanted to cover ABBA but everyone said no so he settled for cowboy goth™ instead
What better man to write a warm and fuzzy Christmas song than the warm and fuzziest man alive (Sav)
108 notes · View notes
denkilightning · 5 years ago
Text
the wip yall asked for im ready for some self validation
important thing to pay in mind: hanta uses they/them pronouns!! and they’re half portuguese from their mother’s side
tw/cw, tags: (lots of) swearing, guns/gunshots, q slur, slight misgendering, unloving biological parents, lgbtq themes
summary: Hanta gets kicked out. Aizawa finds them. Shit happens.
pls give constructive criticism/some validation
Hanta woke up on a couch feeling like absolute shit. Their arms and fucking elbows were raw as fuck. Felt as if they were gonna fall off. 
Wouldn’t be that bad. 
They haven’t felt this bad even after the Sports Festival.
Probably because I haven’t used them much there lmao, they chuckled to themselves. Why did I fall asleep on a couch, anyway? 
Then Hanta remembered what happened last night.
Right. 
They came out to their mother. Which turned into coming out to their parents. Fuck. Because, yeah, that was smart. After their dad said he'd fucking shoot them if they turned out to be a fucking queer back in middle school. 
Right after the Sports Festival, Hanta decided it was a good idea to come out as genderqueer to their mother. 
Mamãe didn’t react so badly. 
A simple ‘You’ll always be my baby boy, querido’. 
Which were not the words they wanted to hear. 
Did it hurt? Yeah. Obviously. It was their mamãe, who was supposed to not only accept, but also support them all their life. 
And then she just… didn’t.  
She still loved them though! And wasn’t that enough? It didn’t feel like enough. It should though, shouldn’t it?
Hanta’s mother was an incredible woman. Smiling through hell, comforting them when they needed, taught them portuguese and everything they knew, really. Quirkless, in the world where only the quirk mattered. She was strong, funny, brave and beautiful. That’s what she was like, wasn’t it?
Hanta wasn’t at their house. They were at Aizawa and Mic’s. Fuck, I didn’t even know they were together. 
You couldn’t blame them, though. They didn’t pay attention to their teachers’ personal lives and these two were very different from each other. Didn’t seem to spend time together more than necessary. 
So Hanta was surprised when Aizawa warned them that Mic was there, too. They put two and two on their own.
Then the sweet smell hit Hanta. Rice, cinnamon and… vanilla?
Home.
It smelled like home. 
Tears pricked at their eyes. Fuck.
Baby steps, anjinho. They heard their mamãe's voice inside their head. 
They took a deep breath and slowly moved one arm. Hurt like hell but was livable. They gripped the blanket in one hand and slowly lifted. Then they moved their legs to test the waters. Their legs seemed fine. Or better than arms, rather. They put their legs on the ground, loosened the grip on the blanket and let it fall. 
It still wasn’t worse than father’s reaction.
Hanta couldn’t remember any actual words but what they did remember was shouting and gunshots and ‘get out of my house’s and fear. They remember feeling absolutely terrified. 
Hanta has never been so scared in their entire life. And they’ve been attacked by tens of villains and frozen by Todoroki, while being watched by the whole nation (if not multiple nations, fucking God).
Long story short, they were kicked out and they’d be homeless and starve to death if Aizawa hadn’t found them on his night patrol.
Hanta looked around and spotted a tall, slim figure in what seemed to be the kitchen. 
Just when the figure turned to them and smiled the extravagant smile, Hanta recognized Present Mic. 
‘I’m making rice pudding.’ Mic smiled. ‘It’s vegan.’ He added brightly.
Hana blinked in surprise.
‘Come on, sit with me.’ Mic invited the with a vague hand gesture. 
Hanta complied.
Mic smiled, pushing the plate towards them. ‘Try some.’
They took the fork. ‘Sure.’
They tasted the meal.
It was… not bad. They weren’t sure if it was good, but it surely wasn’t bad.
But most importantly, it didn’t taste like home. It was a bit sweeter, less vanilla than mamãe used to add. 
But Hanta liked it.
‘Do you like it?’ Mic looked at them with glowing eyes.
Hanta smiled. ‘Yeah.’ 
They looked down at their plate with soft eyes and looked back at Mic. ‘Thanks, Mic!’
Mic looked at them with a weird look in his eyes. Hanta decided he liked it. 
‘Call me Yamada, if you’d like.’
Hanta swallowed the rice and smiled again. ‘Sure.’
Hanta studied Mi- Yamada’s face, while munching on their food. They didn’t even realize how much they needed food until now. 
The guy would be considered really attractive if it weren’t for this fucking mustache, but Hanta had a mullet so they didn’t really have a room to judge. His colors were basically the opposite to Hanta’s. His rich brown skin contrasted nicely with the gold of his hair. He had a pointy nose and small mouth, which was surprising with his quirk in mind. His eyes were the most striking green Hanta has ever seen. And… was this red in his irises?
‘Um… excuse me, but what color are your eyes?’ Hanta asked slowly.
Yamada chuckled.
‘I have partial heterochromia.’ he said. ‘Most of my eyes are green and then there's bam! Red.’ Yamada gestured excitedly.
[the blank, but know toshi toshi comes in]
Don’t fucking assume pronouns, Hanta, they told themselves. A scratchier, brighter voice filled their mind, A hypocrite ain't something you wanna be, fofinho. Hypocrites end in sad places.
Yeah, I’m surely in a sad fucking place. 
‘You’re the guy from the hero course who got wrecked?’ Eyebags eyed Hanta, unimpressed, as they flinched.
That stung.
‘Not a guy.’ Hanta murmured, grimacing.
Eyebags raised their eyebrows and said, ‘Sorry. You’re the kid who got wrecked with that ice overkill?’
A sentence like that shouldn’t lift their spirits but Hanta was a human of low standards.
Hanta chuckled nervously. 
‘Yeah.’ They smiled sheepishly, scratching their neck. ‘And you’re the kid who declared the war on us?’ They raised their eyebrows, grimace turning into a soft smirk.
Just because they got almost killed by their own father doesn’t mean they’re not the piece of shit they’ve always been.
Yamada laughed.
79 notes · View notes
uncoordinated-house-cat · 4 years ago
Note
pls rant about nicholas ii 👀
dude i am so glad u asked. i mean, u didn’t ask for the entire rant about both russian revolutions, but here u are anyway. (but also im a teenager history student so this is very biased and i checked most of my facts but not all of them so don’t quote me and if a history person who actually knows what they’re doing finds a mistake don’t @ me) ok so nicholas ii was an absolute ********** and had an iq of -1000 and he was still super convinced that he could run all of russia, which is like a freaking huge country with millions of people who are super poor (peasants made up 85% of the population in 1905 when the first revolution happened, the number of people below the poverty line was probably way higher when the actual revolution happened and he got overthrown but bitch had it cOMING) 
so here’s the thing. nick, a spoiled child who let’s say is twelve years old when his dad alexander dies of assassination (omg i googled the dates and HE WAS TWELVE I WAS RIGHT FHDSJKLAFHSD) has been told, since he was a tiny but no less annoying baby, that he was amazing and very smart and was absolutely entitled to rule all of russia and he was like ‘hell yeah bro this is my divine right wahoo guess i don’t have to pay attention in my ‘how to be a good leader’ lessons cos god chose me to be the tsar so i already am one #thuglife’ 
so he met this girl named alix, who was princess of somewhere irrelevant and incredibly religious (and also deluded but that becomes important later) and he falls in love with her and they get married, which is nice but probably not a good long-term decision because through her friend, nick meets rasputin (and i love the ra ra rasputin song but rasputin was very very problematic) and that’s one of the many, many, many stupid things he does that makes literally every single person in russia (again, lots of people) mad at him. but nick is in love, and he marries alix, and this is all very nice if russia was a substantially smaller and easier country to run and nick was actually a competent leader then maybe there wouldn’t have been a revolution! but alas, this was not the case. 
so as we all know, russia is fucking enormous. for people who have never looked at a map in their entire life, this is russia
Tumblr media
and it has more landmass than several continents put together. chonky boi. and the capital city where the royal family lives? well, you’d assume it’s somewhere in the middle ish, since russia’s such a huge country and you kinda need to be in the middle in order to have literally any idea what’s going on and stop your people from revolting under your freaking nose, so put it in the middle. 
Tumblr media
but nOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. they put the capital in st. petersburg, a place that’s like five minutes drive from finland, estona, latvia, ukraine (although that would probably take a while but u get the point) and LITERALLY NOWHERE NEAR ANYWHERE IN RUSSIA. ARGH. 
i’m pretty sure the reasoning for this was ‘it’s been there since forever and everything was fine then so we don’t need to change it’ cos back when russia was actually a country-sized country instead of the mammoth it is now (we’re talking 1539, and by country-sized country it was still bigger than most of western europe put together), the country was all the way over to the left, where st. petersburg is, so they probably had the capital there foreeeeeeever. even after they expanded and became mcfreaking enormous bc sOmEoNe (not naming names *cough cough* ivan the terrible *cough cough*) decided it would be an awesome idea to have some expansionist policy, yay, and now we’ve ended up with this monstrosity. and while you might think that having a big country is great, it’s not. here’s why:
- so many people. soooo many people
- how u gonna keep track of all of them?? it takes like 8 years to get from one side of this bad boy to the other
- since nobody can control russia cos of all the land and all the people, the culture just goes absolutely backward. the peasants are too poor to afford food, let alone an education, and it’s not as if nicky is gonna build free public schools or raise wages or anything, lol, so the collective russian mindset is a bit of a dumpsterfire
- if, say, a revolution were to happen, which of course it can’t hahaha everybody know’s nick’s the divine ruler and overthrowing him wouldn’t be possible cos everyone’s so thrilled with their life in a very cold place with no food, awful policies, terrible wages and working conditions and a tsar who cares more about hanging out with his family than actually doing his duty as leader of the biggest country in the world?? then the tsar wOULDN’T KNOW THE REVOLUTION WAS HAPPENING UNTIL IT WAS ALL OVER THE COUNTRY AND SOMEONE WAS HOLDING A GUN TO HIS STUPID TINY PEABRAIN HEAD
and nick did not do a lot to help the russian people to live unproblematic, non-poverty-stricken lives. in the early 1900s, there was a big move to the cities cos everyone was moving to the cities which meant there were more educated people getting jobs or going to university and going ‘hey, our wages are shit, nobody has any food and it seems like the tsar is doing a really bad job and just living in the lap of luxury while his entire country suffers?? should we do something about this??’
but he did do something. oh, boy. nicky, looking at all his ancestors going ‘bro aren’t u gonna expand the country that’s literally the one thing russia is good at u can’t break our streak’ went and conquered siberia. then he built a railway, cos he needed a water outlet for trade and stuff. he called it the trans-siberian railway. he wanted to make it really big, and cross over into manchuria, so he had a bit of a war with china which he won and then he built the railway in manchuria. 
meanwhile, japan has been practising their war tactics a lot recently and while they don’t have much of a reputation in the west (like at all, nobody takes them seriously) and they also want to expand and flex their fighting skills a bit, they cross into manchuria and are like ‘i want this land. gimme’ and nick is like ‘nah fam i’m good’ and japan is like ‘>:( one last warning’ and nick is like ‘lol ur country is tiny and my country is huge have u seen all these buff russian soldiers i have guarding the railway i could crush u with my boot’ and then the japanese launch a surprise attack! on the russian squadron at port arthur. nick made the pikachu face, then the russo-japanese war started. 
uh oh, bad decision! looks like the russians are losing and even tho there’s lots of them there are more japanese and they have better battle tactics, so nick sends more soldiers. thing is, everyone in russia is already super poor so they can’t afford to have the [relatively] healthy, working men go off to war and die, cos that’s not practical at all and now they have even less money and food. fast forward, russia loses the war, nick makes the pikachu face again, stays in his nice mansion while the rest of russia starts going ‘grrr’ as well as ‘brrrr’.
and then this dude called gapon who’s a nice priest guy goes to petition the tsar to have better working conditions, fairer wages, a bunch of other stuff but they’re all very fair and reasonable. nick is like ‘nooooo!!’ and his uncle is like ‘nOoOoO!!!!!!1!!!’ and orders the army to shoot the peaceful protesters, so it gets called bloody sunday. this makes everyone really unhappy again, and it’s called the russian revolution of 1905 cos there are a lot of strikes and even while nick is like ‘haha this isn't happening’ they don’t reeeally accomplish much bc nick stays on the throne, and the russians are very mad but not mad or coordinated enough to overthrow the autocracy. there was this new parliament thingo called the duma, because nick’s only competent political adviser, count witte, was like ‘bro u literally have no choice but to form a new democratic government’ and nick was like ‘oh ok what if i made a government but it’s not really democratic or effective bc they have very limited power’ and witte was like ‘nick nO’ and nick was like ‘hehe nick yes’ and the duma was formed
--fast forward to 1917-- *time vworp noises*
so russia is poor. again. everyone is mad. again. all the men have been sent off to war. again. this time, it’s because of world war 1! 
and yikes, the russian army have it bad. like seriously, those dude were suffering lots and lots. very ouchy, no food, too cold, everyone is dying. it wasn’t great.
nick was like ‘hmm this war seems to be going well anyway look at my children aren’t they cute one of them broke an expensive vase today that’s so funny!!!’ (i made that up but he really didn’t care much and spent a lot of money u get the gist)
lots of strikes are happening. nobody is happy, and this time there are actually some organised people who can channel the rage into a revolution that might actually get something done this time. 
by the way, rasputin has turned up!! *cue the ra ras*
so rasputin introduces himself to some lady who’s a friend of alix, and alix, being super religious and super deluded and also having a sick son -
oh yeah, she had like five kids (was it five? not sure it was a lot) and the first four of them were girls and she was like ‘oh my god who’s gonna rule the country i have to have a boy’ and then she finally had a boy and his name was alexei and everything was great until they discovered that he had haemophilia, which is a hereditary illness that means ur skin is super weak or smth and whenever u, like, bump a table and u would normally get a little bruise, instead u start bleeding like you’ve been shot and yeah it was super problematic and it meant alexei was constantly sick and bleeding
- and so alix said to rasputin, who proclaimed to heal people like he was basically jesus, ‘yo dude can u pls heal my son it’s pretty urgent ngl’ and rasputin was like ‘uh huh lemme just take a look at him’ and he had a check up with alexei who somehow healed?? i don’t know how, he just sorta did, (he still had the haemophilia but alix was convinced it was gone for good) and so she turned into rasputin’s Number One Fan and started spouting all his very false religious conspiracy theories and made him a very important member of politics which was Not Good
and then count witte, the sensible one, was like ‘hmm this rasputin fellow seems kinda shady also he has thousands of STIs i don’t think it’s a good look if ur wife is hanging out with him all the time bc there are lots of rumours and he just seems super sketchy i reckon we should get rid of him’ and nick was like ‘no U’
he just uno reverse-carded him. witte tried to investigate rasputin and then nick was like ‘hmm i guess i’ll dissolve the duma cos ur being annoying’ and witte resigned like two days later. fair. if i had to deal with nick on a daily basis, there would probably be a lot of punching (of him, by me, in case u couldn’t tell bc im full of rage)
and there were a lot of rumours going around about alix & rasputin (which was kinda fair, because they hung out all the time and rasputin was a very sus person) so alix’s credibility was questioned and she was accused of selling secrets to the enemy, which was a bit dramatic (im pretty sure it was because she came from germany, and she was called ‘the german woman’ by a lot of the public)
--- also this isn’t very relevant to nick but i thought it was incredibly funny how rasputin died and it was time for a break from all that serious stuff so ~INTERLUDE~ --- 
note: start listen to rasputin by boney m cos this is where it gets hilarious (and the song also narrates his assassination lol)
so nobody liked rasputin. he had a lot of sex with pretty much everyone, he was very religious but also spouted a lot of nonsense, he was involved in some very dubious stuff and he was in favour of a lot of policies that the general public did not want at all. so a lot of people tried to murder him. and nearly all of them failed!! turns out, rasputin is really difficult to assassinate. there were a bunch of attempts on his life, all failed, before this one dude was like ‘bro i gotta put a stop to this’ so he invited rasputin to his house cos he was rsaputin’s bud (his name was yusupov btw)
dude gave him some cakes. they were laced with cyanide (poison) and rasputin was like cronch cronch, nom nom. did not die. ate a lot of cake. 
yusupov was like ?????????????
gave him some wine. wine was also poisoned. rasputin was like ‘dude this wine is good where can i get some more’ and he drank three glasses of it. the wine was poisoned with cyanide as well, btw. and the doctors who had helped plan this had carefully put enough cyanide in each glass to kill SEVERAL MEN. still not dead somehow???? 
so yusupov went ‘ok time for plan c’ and shot him. rasputin was like ‘ow’ and fell over. yusupov checked his pulse, there was now, he was like ‘ok good job’
and then while they were discussing their cover story upstairs, yusupov went back down to check on rasputin’s body and dude was sTILL ALIVE.
so they shot him again, tied him up, shot him one more time for good measure (and they shot him in the forehead at some point but apparently he was still alive???) and then they threw him into a frozen river. where he died of hypothermia, after having consumed enough cyanide to kill dozens of men and being shot three times, one of which was literally in his head. hhhh.
*sigh of relief* he finally died. fINALLY. the dudes who assassinated him got exiled but nothing worse than that because everyone in russia was like ‘well someone had to do it’
~~END OF INTERLUDE~~
now shit is getting rEAL. i mean, not for nick, obviously. but everyone else is like ‘ohmygosh rasputin is dead we actually got something done yay!!!’ 
so it’s february 1917 in petrograd. nick is on holiday with his family 800km away with literally no idea what’s going on. 15 million russians were away at war, and 1.7 million had died. lots of strikes and protests are happening. bIG protests. people were breaking into stores to get food, because of the awful food shortages, and it was very very cold so everyone was slightly extra mad. the police shot at some of the people who had gotten up onto the rooftops, so they protests turned into riots. all the people who were on strike from work joined the riots, and the women workers who had come out for international women’s day marched around the nearby factories and got another 50,000 people (including students and teachers) to join the riots (which was A Lot) and by the 25th of february the riots had gotten so big that pretty much every business in petrograd was shut down. literally everyone was rioting. 
the tsar was like ‘hmm that doesn’t look good’ and ordered his army to shut the riots down. there were about 180k troops in the city, but only about 12k were actually able to fight bc the rest of them were all injured from the war. they didn’t want to suppress the riots by force bc a lot of women were in the crowds (guess chivalry isn’t dead?) so when the tsar was like ‘no u gotta do it’ the troops were like ‘fuck u’ and either joined the riots or yeeted outta there. hooray!! 
the tsar was like ‘ok everything is under control’ (partly bc his official informant gave him the wrong info rip) and didn’t accede to any of the rioter’s demandsor do anything for a while. and here’s the thing. the tsar’s cabinet sent a telegram to nick saying ‘bro u gotta resign, we’re literally on the verge of revolution’ and nick read it, wrote ‘lol’ in his diary and refused to answer. 
the next day, there was another telegram saying ‘bro, u GOTTA resign. the revolution is happening now. if u don’t resign, the entire monarchy will be overthrown and ur reign will be o-v-e-r’ 
and nick wrote an entry in his diary saying ‘what nonsense is this? i can’t believe they’re sending me telegrams about this rubbish, as if i’m going to do anything’ (and im paraphrasing bc i don’t have my book w me but he definitely used the word “nonsense” and wrote a bunch of awful stuff about it) 
the next day, nick got another telegram that basically said ‘welp. country’s over. good while it lasted, revolution is happening now and it’s too late for you to do anything about it bc u didn’t listen to my numerous warnings to resign’ and nick was like ‘wait should i... do something about this??? hmm... yeah!! i’ll go up to petrograd and show ‘em who’s boss!! can’t defeat the absolute power of the tsar, huzzah!!’ 
and he went up to petrograd and got arrested. he had no choice but to abdicate, adn then he and the rest of his family were put under house arrest. there was a bit of an argument about whether they should be exiled to some western country, but all the western europeans were like ‘we don’t want nick u can keep him’ so they put him under house arrest in one of his palaces, where nick pretty much just chilled out with his family until they were all executed because everyone in russia was still very mad at them. 
(and in 1981 nick and his family were recognised as ‘martyred saints’, which is fine for the rest of them but nick absolutely did not deserve it)
thus concludes my very, very long rant. i spent way too long writing this, but my history teacher would be proud of me.
2 notes · View notes
himbowelsh · 4 years ago
Note
7 from the kiss prompts with runner/chuckler pls xx
sha-la-la-la my oh my, looks like the boy’s too shy  💋 (accepting!) 7.  routine kisses where the other person presents their cheek/forehead for the hello/goodbye kiss without even looking up from what they’re doing
Vera doesn’t quite understand what Hoosier means, when he opens the door to them in the middle of Sid Phillips’s already bustling house party, and declares, “Finally! Someone to tell me I’m not crazy.”
“Got the wrong guy for that, buddy. Unless you ask real nicely,” Bob declares, patting Hoosier on the shoulder as he steps inside. 
Hoosier shrugs him off with a grunt, hardly sparing his friend a glance. “What makes you think I’m talking to you?” He looks offended at the idea. Instead, his sharp gaze is fixed solely on Vera, drawing her inside before she even has a chance to say hello. “You. Somebody with actual eyes in their head. Thank fuck you’re here, cause I can’t take another second of this.”
“Hello to you too, Bill,” she remarks fondly, shrugging her coat off and handing it off to her waiting boyfriend. Bob smirks over his shoulder as he abandons Vera to Hoosier Smith’s mercy; Vera, quite content to be abandoned, just smiles back. She enjoys Hoosier, for all his idiosyncrasies. He’s coarse and forthright, says exactly what he means… and always smiles like he’s got a secret, and sharing it with you is an act of remarkable magnanimity. Vera loves to be in on those secrets, passed so sparingly from Hoosier’s lips to whoever he chooses to honor. She loves figuring them out. She loves figuring him out  —  sometimes thinks she’s almost got it.
“Look,” he declares without preamble, keeping one firm hand in the center of Vera’s back to guide her through the crowd. Though a little baffled, Vera is nonetheless intrigued. She follows, waving at a few faces she recognizes, flashing grins of greeting that Hoosier doesn’t acknowledge at all. It’s a full house tonight, the crowd swarming through Sid’s downstairs parlor and dispersing amidst his family’s substantial living rooms. The upstairs is blocked off out of common decency… but no doubt, a few couples will find a way to sneak up there, trusting the Phillipses to have guest bedrooms to spare. No doubt Bob will want to give it a try… and, at some point, Vera might even agree.
For now, though, she could do with a drink. Relief ripples through her as they step into Sid’s kitchen — a picture of modernity, marble floors and countertops highlighting the latest microwave model his father’s been able to afford. A few kids have taken advantage of the chic coffee maker; a few others have scattered ice chips and rock salt, dissected lime slices forgotten on the counter. If there was a bartender, he’s gone. It’s every man for himself, and the drinks are flowing.
Hoosier sets her up very strategically near the doorway, in a perfect vantage spot to survey the room. “Wait here,” he declares, adjusting her shoulders at an angle.
“Rum and cranberry juice,” Vera informs him, like reading off a price tag.
Hoosier smirks. “Lady with taste.”
As he goes, her eyes follow himself across the kitchen. It occurs to her, not for the first time, that Hoosier is blunt to a fault; it wouldn’t kill him to elaborate a little more, especially when he wants something. Vera’s got no clue what she’s supposed to be looking at, or for. as her eyes drift from Hoosier to scan the kitchen, she finds herself at more of a loss.
There’s Stella, perched atop the counter with her legs crossed, steadied by a young man with both hands on her hips; if they twitch too far sideways, the drinks forgotten beside them will spill everywhere, but neither one looks concerned. Sid’s red headed friend Eugene is frowning at his highball like he doesn’t know what to do with it. A harassed-looking Jay is trying to pour out a plate of chips and salsa, but people passing by keep stealing them as quickly as he can lay the snacks out. Standing behind the island, which doubles as a bar, Chuckler and Runner have set up and are taking orders.
Vera catches Chuckler’s eye. Immediately, he breaks into a grin, calling out a greeting to her. She waves back, perching on her toes to be seen over the crowd. God knows this dress looks great on her — Bob stared for a solid minute, before declaring turquoise was suddenly his new favorite color — but the matching flats do nothing for her height. Chuckler’s tall enough that he can be spotted anywhere.
Hoosier makes it to the bar just in time; Chuckler has already nudged Runner, and they ignore their friend in favor of calling out to her. “Hey, Vera!” Runner says, voice carrying easily over the music and chattering crowd. “Who’s entertaining you over there?”
“You guys, as always.” Hoosier looks supremely put-out, which is Vera’s cue to leave her assigned spot. She joins Hoosier’s side, laying a fond hand on his arm while bracing herself against the bar. “Bill’s my date for tonight. I lost Bob somewhere on the walk in.”
“His loss, not yours.” Runner is already mixing up her drink order, movements deft and confident. “Anything you feel like, tonight — Sid’s given me official bartender status, cause I’m the only one who knows how to make a decent screwball ‘round here.”
Chuckler puffs up with pride. “I’m helping.”
“Help,” Runner scoffs, shaking a steel thermos violently. “That’s one word for it. You see what he did over there? You see that?”
Vera has, in fact, seen the mess left on the counter. Her lips purse in sympathy.
“Do you know how dangerous cutting lines can be?” demands Chuckler, defensive on principle. “The juice squirts. It’s like acid.”
“Don’t say you got it in your eyes —“ He leans in, proving exactly that, in more explicit detail than Vera would like. Her frown turns into an full-on grimace. “Ooh, Lew.”
Runner sets two drinks in front of them, sliding a whiskey towards Hoosier and Vera’s crimson concoction, adorned with one of the lethal limes, her way. “Ahh, he’s fine,” he declares, smacking Chuckler in the center of his broad chest. “Look at ‘im — healthy as ever.”
And that’s when it happens. Vera’s not sure what she was expecting, really, when Hoosier demanded she look — but Runner’s hand lingers where it struck Chuckler’s chest, and almost on reflex Chuckler turns into him. Just like that, they kiss. The peck on the side of Chuckler’s mouth is so deft, so effortless, that if she weren’t looking right at them she might think she imagined things.
Neither of them bat an eye; they just go right back to what they were doing, Runner mixing and Chuckler setting out glasses, like it’s any other day.
Hoosier pinches her hard underneath the bar top.
With no one else reacting, Vera finds herself at a loss. A few seconds pass, threatening a silence bound to be awkward, before she summons her most charming grin and swipes her drink off the bar. “Alright, you guys,” she says lightly. “We’d better go track down Bob.”
“Save the poor bastard whose ears he's talking off,” Hoosier adds, deadpan.
“A rescue mission. Right.” Vera claps his arm, subtly towing him away. “We’ll see you around… keep up the good work!”
Chuckler and Runner have other customers, and more orders to fill. They just wave, Chuckler sending Vera another bright smile, as their friends go on their way.
To his credit, Hoosier waits until they’re out of the kitchen to shoot the elephant in the room. “You saw it, right? You saw that shit.”
“I saw it.” She doesn’t know what else to say. Her head is still kind of spinning from it. Eager for a distraction, Vera takes a sip of her drink. Her eyes widen— possibly larger than at the moment her two friends smooched. “Oh my god, this is actually amazing. Why is this — he actually knows what he’s doing.”
“First time in his life.” Hoosier still clutches his rum; the expression on his face makes it clear he’d have preferred the whole bottle. “They been doing that all night. All week. It’s been going on for fuckin’ weeks.” He rounds on her, and for the first time, Vera sees desperation in his eyes. The worst part is, she gets it. “And every time I bring it up to your boyfriend, he looks at me like I going the crazy. Can’t decide if he’s blind or I’m stupid, but they’re definitely…”
“Dating,” Vera decodes promptly.
“You think?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“I…” Hoosier blinks, mirroring Vera’s baffled expression, with twice the consternation thrown into the mix. “Well, how the fuck do I know? I’m not dating either of ‘em, I dunno what they’re like.”
“The kissing speaks for itself, Bill,” says Vera, gently, feeling like she’s telling a child their goldfish has died. 
A familiar voice from behind them cuts through the awkward atmosphere like a hot butter knife. “Kissing?” Bob echoes, sidling up behind Vera just to wrap an arm around her waist. She leans into him, because he likes to show off in public, and went through the trouble of wearing her favorite cologne tonight. When she turns her head to greet him, he’s grinning, a wicked gleam in his eye. “Don’t tell me you went off and had fun without me?”
Hoosier must be relieved for the distraction. He smirks. “A lot more fun without you.”
“Bill unhooked the bra on his first try,” Vera adds brightly.
Bob clicks his tongue, looking between his best friend and girlfriend in a terrible impression of abject betrayal. “Showing me up, huh? I thought we were friends.” Sensibly, he doesn’t give Hoosier the chance to reply. Instead, he scans the crowd around them, eyes narrowing. “You guys seen the terrible two around here?”
“Just left them tending bar in the kitchen,” Hoosier replies; as quickly as it vanished, that same harassed look floods back over his face. “They’re doing it again.”
“What?” 
“Don’t give me that. Vera saw it too.”
“Saw what?” Bob demands, innocent as a Catholic schoolgirl. When he looks toward Vera — honest-to-god question plain on his face — she stares at him for a moment before shaking her head.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”
“Noticed what?” Bob demands, voice rising an octave as he darts between Vera and Hoosier. When Vera rounds on the only other sane person here, expression demanding an explanation, Hoosier just shakes his head. I told him, the mile-long look in his eyes declares. I told him more than once.
If he really hasn’t noticed, there’s no choice. They’ve got to show him. With a nod of agreement, the two set their conspiracy into motion. Hoosier seizes Bob’s arm, tugging him through the crowd, while at his side Vera encourages in the gentlest, completely non-pushing way possible. Bob lets out a squawk of protest, because he was just talking to someone else with an interest in the French and Indian War, he could introduce them — but Hoosier isn’t having it.
“Leave me to deal with it on my own, then tell me you didn’t notice… shitty eyesight, piece-of-shit observation skills for a goddamn journalist — quit dragging your toes, Leckie, and get in here.”
They come to a stop in the doorway, roughly where Hoosier left Vera ten minutes ago. She settles her hand on his shoulder and declares, “Wait.”
“Wait — for what? I’m not even allowed a drink?”
“Shut your mouth and open your eyes,” Hoosier hisses.
It doesn’t take more than a few minutes — that’s the incredible part. They don’t have to observe any longer than it takes for Vera to finish her drink until, out of nowhere, Chuckler proves their point again. This time, he catches Runner with a kiss as he’s squeezing by to serve a drink on the other side of the bar. Runner doesn’t even acknowledge it, save for the ghost of a smile flickering across his lips. When they maneuver past each other again, Runner squeezes behind, and his hand goes somewhere that makes Chuckler jump.
“Yeah,” Vera affirms, nodding to herself. “Definitely dating.”
“Nah,” replies Hoosier. “My money’s on fucking. They don’t have the emotional intelligence.”
“What am I looking at?” asks Bob.
They both turn on him, baffled.
“You didn’t,” Vera says — then stops, takes a deep breath, and tries again. “You didn’t see them do that?”
“You didn’t see ‘em do it last week in the diner? Or the other night, in the back of your car? Or on my goddamn couch?” At Bob’s blank stare, Hoosier slowly leans in, seizing him by the arm with a calm fierceness almost guaranteed to bruise. “They’ve been doing it for the last few weeks. Everywhere.”
“It’s almost cute,” Vera muses. “They make it seem easy. Bob, you’ve never kissed me like that.”
“Like what?” Bob exclaims.
“Really?” says Hoosier. “He ain’t ever kissed you like muscle memory?”
Vera regards her boyfriend for a long moment. Bob shifts under her gaze, helpless and inflamed at some offense he wasn’t even aware of making. His ignorance is his one saving grace — Bob Leckie has never played dumb in his life, so genuinely missing what’s right in front of him is the more likely bet. It’s all a matter of perception, Vera supposes. You see what you want to see.
Or, in poor Hoosier’s case, what you don’t.
“Don’t worry,” Hoosier declares, clapping his friend on the shoulder. “I’m sure if you ask nice, those two’ll be happy to give you pointers.”
“Pointers for what?” Bob demands, two seconds away from choking on his own bafflement.
There’s no point telling him. He’ll have to figure it out on his own eventually… and until then, Hoosier will have to put up with fifth wheeling between Bob and Vera, and whatever’s going on behind the bar. Runner’s shoulder bumps against Chuckler’s own, casually affectionate, and it takes all of Vera’s self-control not to, “aww,” out loud.
Maybe soon her boyfriend will be as quick on the uptake as those two are with their kisses.
15 notes · View notes
fart-gate · 4 years ago
Text
SGA
Season 5 episode 11
Notes by me
- PREVIOUSLY - Daniel (bimbo #1) precious archeologist babey has entered the discord, him and Rodney (bimbo #2) found a secret lab with weird devices and got kidnapped bc of it (typical). They were forced to turn on one of the devices and it started disintegrating wraith ships whenever they tried hyper space!!! Uh oh!!! .....todd is mad. Atlantis tried to gate out but the gate blew up and all my kids are in danger and im stressed!!!!!
- anyway
- worried!teyla
- I heard a groan and trust me I know johns groans
- glass in johns back 👀
- he was lying on top of radek to protect him 😩😩
- watch out people. Pissed off half bug man coming through
- while the theme plays i will voice something that has been bothering me for the past few episodes. Where the FUCK is Sam
- shirtless!john on my screen👀
- "wheres McKay when you need him" Daniel has died and come back so many times that nobody is remotely concerned about him anymore lol. So far ive heard like 3 ppl say theyre worried about Rodney and nobody has even mentioned Daniel LMAO hes the cockroach of the stargate program and they all know it
- how did Rodney figure it out so fast damn
- "5 bucks to anyone who can contact the deadalus"
- todd is losing his touch if he thinks that atlantis would put theyre own gate in jeopardy???? Like hello??? They go through all the trouble to make sure both parties can benefit from the truce and then double cross him???? Does he think????
- hes more than 10000 yrs old YIKES
- you know as much as I dont like Woolsey I dont want him to die...
- MEANWHILE ronon and keller are off to a great start 👍
- you know ronon is actually really smart....and they use it when you least expect it.
- bodyguard ronon 🔥
- larrin??? Oh boy
- I cant get over how casual Daniel is about this lol
- when Rodney steps in front of Daniel to protect him 💕💗💕💗💕💗👌👌
- this pirate lady is hot
- "larrin would have come yourself but you know..."
Its ok john she'll fuck you later
- ronon walking around blasting things, not even knowing what hes shooting
Tumblr media
- this big metal people are being asshats.......not that they werent asshats already
- "jennifer" aaaahhhhhhh
- she faked him out lol!!!
- hey we got a great shot of ronons ass. Hate to see him go but love to watch him leave👀 🍑
- "what are you" thank you finally
- HOLY FUCK ITS THE ASGARD OH MY GOD. HOLY SHIT
- OF ALL THE SHSIABSJSBS I WOULD NOT HAVE GUESSED ASGARD !!!!
- I had to pause it to process gimme a sec
- research on humans? Oh right theyre asshats I forgot
- listen you stupid little gray bitch, just bc the others are dead doesnt mean they were wrong
- 🙋 i trust the fifteen yr old
- hearing john talk about Daniel makes me think about what an episode with just them would be like 🤔💗💗💗
- "we had to escape to a planet with a toxic atmosphere"
"Oh! That sounds nice."
Hes giving me Jack Snark
- is todd good now im confused
- Daniel getting chucked into the room and losing his glasses👌 we never see him lose his glasses enough
- "I think i figured a way out!"
"Really?"
His liddle face
- "Mentally Unstable Like A Fox" Rodney my guy ......what does this MEAN
- why is Rodney the leader of Team Bimbo
- "omg dont kill me you need me!"
"Rodney!"
"Us! you need us!"
- are they gonna wear the suits pls say yes
- john still begging for larrin to come to atlantis and fuck him
- theyre wearing the suits!!!
Tumblr media
- Collision Imminent
- ah the ol' Set Ship On Collision Course And Then Bail trick......
- Daniel and rodney together is just a constant sass fest
- woa using the hyper space window to get away!!!! Badass 🔥🔥🔥🔥
- Daniel hit by electricity !!!!!!
- worried!Rodney
- what is this sad piano music is he dying Again
- micheal shanks acting 👌👌✨✨✨
- no no no no no
- beamed!!!!
- when in doubt, blow it up!!!
- "I'll look for a can opener"
- john:
Tumblr media
- "interested in somebody else" AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
- embarrassed!ronon
- AWKWARD AS HELL
- hospital!Daniel ❤❤❤
-daniel grateful to rodney for saying he respects him 😍😍😍
- "so you only give compliments to the dying???" I cant stand them
3 notes · View notes
johnnys-so · 5 years ago
Note
I recall you saying you don't know Day6 well enough for an analysis, but what about now? If you can, we'd love one. Thank you!
HEYOOO! 
Umm a lot hasn’t changed on that front but I feel like the distance might be a good thing so I’m going to attach some small mini-analysis after the cut.
sungjin
Tumblr media
Bob is literally the most dad friend ever and I think he really takes the cake (though GOT7′s JB comes a close second). He looks so constantly done with all of his members, and yet - probably the one who cleans the kitchen and makes sure to stock up on water/ramyeon/veggies etc.
I feel like he was born to be the hyung, you know? He is the responsible and primary caregiver type. Even though he doesn’t make a big show of it, it seems to be a big part of his personality that he takes care of other people
Also, my god his humour is just.... something commendable, truly. He can’t be funny to save his ass but atleast he keeps trying and i think THATS what so funny about him??? sungjin-ah.... never give up bby
I feel like he’s the least complicated of all members. He doesn’t seem to be the emotionally volatile type and seems very centred in his personality, he also seems oddly like he might have a sister? a younger one (does he? idk, mydays pls let me know). it’s just that other than the protective bear stereotype, he does seem emotionally well-adjusted. Maybe he’s just at that point in life where he can encounter a shitty day or some sort of hardship and look at it straight and say - ok, that’s fucked up. But I guess we gotta just work through it. (in comparison, wonpil would be shrieking through his lungs AND working through it)
in terms of a temper i think he most certainly has one but it takes him a while to get there and i don’t think he’d talk through it AT ALL. maybe cleanliness would be his pet peeve? (im just shooting in the dark here)
to wrap it up, sungjin is the sort of guy (in my opinion at least) who has a strong and steady value system and he’s sort of ok with dealing with the world as long as he has it figured out in his head. He knows who he is, and therefore there is little conflict he brings to the world. If he wasn’t playing in this band, I’d 1000% see him settle for the corporate life and clean9 to 5 job which lets him come back home by 7pm and have some cold beer while watching football and hearing his kids play in the living room
Jae
Tumblr media
Aww man this skinny bitch. I feel like the fandom is sleeping on his ‘annoying prankster’ potential because i think  he’d give peeves a run for his money
derives great joy from the misery and anguish of others (probably has Wonpil maniacally laughing in the background)
on a normal day Jae is the sort of person who’s probably going through memes on the phone while everyone’s having a serious conversation about their tour or like their everyday schedules. He has a few things he cares about in life and is okay to take a backseat when it comes to the other shit. As long as he gets what he needs (a possible slytherin mofo?)
But that’s not to say that he’s easygoing or wishywashy about the things that he does care about. Music, matters a lot to him. Even though he’s not academically musically instructed (as young k is) he has spent a whole lot of time and effort into educating himself to the point that it really shows in their albums (i could wax poetry about the complexity of Day6′s music and how its so refreshing in it’s personality of being both goth and peppy i-). So Jae is most certainly determined, goal driven and very intrinsically motivated
Also, very much in his head. If he doesn’t have a strong pisces placement, I’m willing to eat my foot. I feel like while Young K is very intense about his emotions, Jae gets very emotional about the people he surrounds himself with.
With people: not very trusting of everyone. Has a chosen few that he goes to certain things about. Might be the kind of person who distributes his troubles by categories to various confidants. But also, trust is something that is earned with jae. But that is not to say that he won’t get along with other people. He’s cordial and is good in engaging a crowd (as a performer, MC, friend, VJ) but he’s also good at drawing lines and boundaries
the most incredible part of his personality for me has always been his work-ethic and his drive to be better. He’s always challenging himself through his existing skill set, but also pushing himself to learn new things. Sounds like a bloody workaholic to me. 
probably shit at figuring out his own feelings/emotions/attitude about certain things. But always up for being the wise advice-giver to other delinquents (read: jamie)
sarcastic wit to sass everyone for days. probably a loki over thor guy
Kink master extraordinaire. Likes cooking up shit and encourages people to sin.
Young K
Tumblr media
emo baby af. But we all knew this so more on that later
The ultimate Onion of a personality. Young K, off the bat, seems like he hides so many layers. Not purposely at all, but simply because he’s unable to communicate the extent of his mental world to the public
one beautiful way he has found to channelise all of his thoughts and ideas about the world is clearly through his music and lyrics. But he’s also extremely creative in other ways (art and fashion). I feel like he’s the sort of person who feels most confident and assured in himself when he’s creating. 
socially, what a mess. I wouldn’t say he has trust issues like Jae does but im pretty sure he’s made some foolish mistakes about choosing friends and not realising how to navigate that friendship (friendships where he has demanded too much or has been demanded too much of??). But otherwise a jovial fool the kind of person who laughs the loudest (and dorkiest) at a dinner with friends
how’s his alcohol intake? I have this super funny intake of a drunk young k trying to write mini love poems for all his friends and sungjin being called to take him home and the call actually begins with “did he try to be poetic again?”
while im trying to paint a picture of him as a jester (because young k also needs to be seen for beyond his emotionality) he’s the kind of guy that would surprise you with how brilliant he is. An actual wisecrack/genius, and very underappreciated. I wouldn’t be surprised if he someday returns to teaching
Right. Emotionality though. If he isn’t some pisces (sun or moon) i will actually yell. He’s the definition of ‘someone who navigates an alternate plane, is open to a world that most people don’t even begin to understand exists’. i feel like speaking to him about abstract concepts - such as the existence of truth, the point of life, the definition of beauty, other existential phenomenon - would be so much fun because he’s have such an interesting and unconventional take on things. I feel like he’s make me humble with the words he has (he already makes me feel so secure with all of his lyrics because i realize, even if the world is shit what a relief that someone like young k exists)
probably would be a guilt-ridden but a wonderfully emotionally supportive boyfriend. Someone who understands your demons all too well and would go the extra mile to provide whatever help he can
1000% has high neuroticism scores that would be cause for concern. someone give him a Beck’s depression inventory right away.
HAHAHAHAH probably the fucking kinkiest mofo, after Jae
Wonpil
Tumblr media
An actual baby!!
No ok but wonpil has matured THE most in all of Day6 and i really didn’t realise it until i notice how his expressions have become more closed during airport pics, and his voice has gained a new level of emotionality in live stages, and he’s also a lot more reserved these days on variety shows
still the most extrovert in the group. I just think the fame, the crowd, the possible betrayals as a result of their growing fame and having to be an adult in this tough situation - has gotten to him. But that’s inevitable really. None of us can be protected from the reality of life that leeches away at our innocence
such a vibrant soul. Such a giver. As a friend, he’s literal sunshine. Not much of a protector, but more of an amicable I’ll-always-be-there-for-you sort of person (though im guessing the amount of people he extends this courtesy to nowadays has probably reduced. 
fucking made to be an entertainer. He’s naturally funny and attracts all the energy (and eyes) in the room to himself. A very good mood maker if you will
in terms of neuroticism, I think he’d be more on the depression (from the constant stress workstyle and the increasing loneliness) than an anxious person. I think he probably is a bit volatile in his emotions but that’s because he gets lost in the moment. He’s literally someone who lives in the present far more than he lives in the past (sungjin or young k) or the future (jae)
don’t think he's intrinsically motivated much. Prone to a lot of lazy days, a lot of extreme gaming and just randomnly playing jokes and pranks on people. he’d need some strongly external guidance/deadlines to get his work ethic going
high extraversion and agreeableness, probably low on conscientiousness (especially discpline) but fascinated by aesthetic beauty (openness to experience).
Dowoon
Tumblr media
Honest to god i cannot figure him out. I think it’s a case of - im trying to look deeper and harder but the truth is, it’s not even that complicated
underappreciated oppa potential 100000%
still comes through as a dork of a maknae. has zeROhand eye coordination outside of drumming. the kind of kid who breaks the glassware and blames it on his sibling (wonpil) and his parents totally believe him because he could do no wrong (aka sungjin grudginly yells at wonpil, again, about house rules)
just a man dedicated to his drums and his food. if he can play some solid beats, get some work done on the albums, play a nice set on a tour, have some chicken and beer while he is resting, have his hyungs fool around in the green room --> he good bruh
but by no means does that make him a fool (though i do think he’s a bit of a fool sometimes when it comes to picking up social cues about wonpil/jae making fun of him. he lacks the 눈치 you know what i mean)
Also (maybe I just love plot twists) but i think he’d be eerily good at picking up on people feeling sad/depressed/lonely/off in general. He’d be like that guy who just walks into the room and sees you just slinking away on the sofa and he thinks.... nah im just going to give them space and go get myself some food. But literally a few seconds later, he sits by you on the sofa, offers you food, and asks what’s on your mind. The silent supporter kind. Willing to listen, willing to be there for you
i don’t know much about dowoon so im just going to end this with: arms that can lift kids/ crush you in a bear hug/ pin you against a wall and leave bit marks on your neck
sorry if that didn’t cover much. I sort of only know day6 with their music. If im extremely wrong or way off about someone, please reach out and correct me!!
17 notes · View notes
shikai-the-storyteller · 5 years ago
Text
CYBERVERSE WATCH: S3 Episode 13, 14, 15, 16
Episode 13
MACCADAM IS MY GRANDPA NOW
Jetfire!!! And Skybite!!! Skybite’s got a great laugh
Oh wow the cloaking still protects them? Nice!
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE FIX PERCY’S EYES, WHERE THE FRICK IS RATCHET
A MULTIVERSE DRIVE???
PLEASE...PLEASE LET US SEE OTHER UNIVERSES??? OTHER UNIVERSES PLEASE????
SPARE SOME MULTIVERSE STUFF FOR A POOR SOUL???
I mean as it stands, the fact that Cyberverse is talking about this stuff is more than satisfying, man I frickin love this show
“We can launch those squiggly things into a whole ‘nother universe!” his delivery of that line was so good and also Wheeljack pls, then it’ll be another version of you’s problem
MEGATRON REALLY *IS* POUTING, MEGATRON YOU BIG BABY
Maccadam fondly but watching them talk about their battle plans makes me feel so bad for him...
AW MAN IS MEGATRON GONNA CHUCK OPTIMUS INTO A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE
About time you showed up you big pouting pansy
Tumblr media
Man these two totally were ex boyfriends
LMAO ARCEE AND SHADOW-STRIKER’S EVIL LAUGHS, THAT”S SO DELIGHTFUL
That Titan should just smack them out of the sky tbh
SKULLCRUNCHER THE CROC...NICE
I love that Soundwave and Roddy are manning the controls
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Commanders command. And you forget, we have backup” CUTE...CUTE....CUTE!!!
I’M SO PROUD OF MY BOYS!!!!!!
Tumblr media
BEE!!!It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! I love my little yellow boy!!! Please take care of your dad Bee
OH NO IT”S CREEPY TENTACLE DOCTOR
GOTH GIRL AND PREP GIRL!!! 
MAN I JUST KNOW SOMETHING’S GOING TO GO HORRIFICALLY WRONG HERE
FRICK NOT THIS DUDE AGAIN
AW MAN NOT A WHOLE BUNCH AT ONCE
YEAAAHHHHH WHEELJACK AND MEGATRON WORKING TOGETHER!!! NICE
Two Decepticons and one Autobot...not a good sign
Oh shoot it’s the DECEPTICONS who wanna universe-jump, MEGATRON COME ON DUDE YOU DIDN’T EVEN TAKE YOUR ARMY WITH YOU DUMMY
OH NO!!!!!!
“It’s time for the commanders to join the battle” MAN YOU’RE SO COOL RODDY (YOU TOO SOUNDWAVE)
OH SHOOT THERE GOES THE TOWER
WELL FRICK
DON”T “WE DID IT” HOT ROD YOUR DAD IS IN THAT WRECKAGE
“Quintessons: Inferior. Cybertronians: Superior” MAN I”LL NEVER GET TIRED OF THAT
Tumblr media Tumblr media
HE”S SO COOL!!!!! FIST BUMP BUDDIES!!! Man I’m so over the moon that these two wound up getting along
You know I’m suddenly having a revelation: I wonder if they could somehow re-activate all those other Soundwaves to help them against the (inevitable) final battle I’m sure they’re gonna have
WHAT THE FRICK
ARE YOU FRICKIN KIDDING ME
Starscream: CANCELED, CANCELED, YOU”RE ALL CANCELED
Well, Megatron certainly got the heck out of dodge at the right time lmao
Episode 14
Tumblr media
I legit thought they were going to do an ATLA ref for half a second
Oh my gosh is this an Autobot recruitment video???
“The universe. You ever thought about it?” GOSH THIS VIDEO....
I’m frickin cackling, the Quintessons were like “Hmm, what’s the worst thing we could possibly inflict on this planet?” then went “Oh, of course, Starscream”
WHY DIDN”T YOU JUST LET GO STARSCREAM
Wow Starscream really did just sell out his entire planet huh
SOUNDWAVE NO!!!!! JEEZ HE GOT EVERYONE
Jeez and Starscream has to share with two other faces, that sucks
Lmao Starscream is just like “Nah judging people is what I was born for”
UNSPACE??? UH OK
WAIT isn’t that what Wheeljack made a few episodes ago????
LMAO HE’S GONNA WAIT TIL HE CAN GET OPTIMUS AND MEGATRON TOO bless Starscream and his pettiness
“First I must witness their humiliation!” STARSCREAM PLEASE the Quintessons really got the worst Judge
OHHH WHAT’S HE GONNA DO
SOUNDWAVE YOU’RE SO POWERFUL!!!!!
OH NO HE GOT THEM AGAIN....
GOSH I ACTUALLY GASPED WHEN THEY BROKE SOUNDWAVE’S AUDIO THING, NO!!!
“Well, it did for one of us, and it only takes one Autobot to make a difference” Bee? Whirl??? Wheeljack???
WINDBLADE!!! EVEN BETTER!!! The person with the braincell!!!
I love that Rodimus doesn’t even look worried, he just sighs like “aw man not this loser again”
On the one hand: Worried about my boys On the other: Man I love these two being buds
Also: Not To Be That Guy But it looks like Soundwave’s wearing white thigh-highs with little orange hearts on them and it’s VERY distracting
Tumblr media
“You two work so well together!!!” OH NO OH NO OH NO ARE THEY GONNA FUSE THEM TOGETHER OR SOMETHING
THOSE HEAD MASKS ARE SO DISTURBING
uh oh what kind of loop is this
THE PLAGUE OF RUST OH NO
oh my gosh STARSCREAM’S MAKING THEM DO A BUFFING LOOP...THAT’S REALLY THE WORST THING YOU COULD THINK OF STARSCREAM....
“WHERE ARE MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS PRIME” well Optimus is under a pile of concrete, so
Lmao thank you for your peanut-gallery commentary Kup
OH SHOOT THEY DID JUMP THROUGH THE MULTIVERSE BRIDGE
MAN THAT LOOKS SO FRICKIN COOL???? YO SHOUTOUT TO THE BACKGROUND ARTISTS WHO WORKED ON THIS SHOW, YOU ROCK
Tumblr media Tumblr media
SERIOUSLY IM IN LOVE WITH THAT I hope whoever did the background art shares their work online sometime, I’ll be ALL over that
AHH I ALWAYS FORGET HOW SHORT THESE EPISODES ARE
Excuse me, Jeremy Levy as WHO???
Tumblr media
Episode 15
Kup you are an...interesting commentator choice lmao
MACCADAM..... :(
Windblade please save our favorite Grandpa
wINDBLADE!
Tumblr media
HOW’S IT FEEL BEING THE COOLEST KID ON THE BLOCK WINDBLADE
Wait I *JUST* noticed the title calls this “Bumblebee: Cyberverse Adventures” ???? IS THAT NEW
Tumblr media
CALL ME A SUCKER BUT WINDBLADE CRACKING HER NECK AND TELLING THE LITTLE SHARK DUDES TO BRING IT ON WAS QUITE POSSIBLY ONE OF THE BEST MOMENTS OF THE SERIES SO FAR
Windblade: *does anything* Me: IM GAY
“I don’t do fear” GOSH I LOVE MY TALENTED GIRL
OH NO!!! OH NO!!!! WINDBLADE NO!!!!!
AND HER WINGS TOO??? WHY!!!!
MACCADAM HELP HER OUT COME ON DUDE WHAT HAPPENED TO NO FIGHTING
lmao rip at the dude crushed by the juke box
Wait I thought they already woke up Iaconus??
YEAH!!!!!!!! MACCADAM AND WINDBLADE TEAMING UP
Tumblr media
“UNFORGIVABLE CRIMES AGAINST ME!” LMAO I LOVE THAT LITERALLY EVERYONE IS TUNING OUT STARSCREAM get rekt Starscream.
Not to rag on people who like Starscream because I like him too but me @ Starscream stans tbh 
You guys just need to hold hands! I mean seriously, come on you guys!
STARSCREAM QUINTESSONS OMG I just noticed they’re all wearing Starscream’s colors pffft
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
AW.....MACCADAM’S FIRST HIGH-FIVE....:’) I bet Windblade and Maccadam both give the best hugs and best high-fives 
They’re so cute MAN I love Cyberverse!!!! I love how sweet these characters are!!!
A psychic trap??? Hoo boy
Windblade: How do I defeat this psychic trap? Maccadam: Well, it would help if you had any bug or dark-type Pokemon on you.
“Or you could just tell me!” I JUST SAID THAT TOO LMAO gosh I love the writing on this show
OHHH I LOVE THE CONTRAST OF IACONUS’ BRAIN WITH BEE’S BRAIN IN SEASON ONE, THAT”S SO GOOD
Tumblr media
OH LMAO HE MEANT HER SWORD I thought he meant like “your inner-strength” or “your wisdom” NO HE MEANT “USE YOUR SWORD WINDBLADE” LOL
OHHH SPOOKY VOICE, I DIG IT
Wow Starscream’s really reading out his 1000 page long call-out post to a captive audience
LMAO THEY”RE JUST LISTING OUT DATE LOCATIONS
Tumblr media
CHROMIA IS SO CUTE!!!!!!!! AHHH
OH NO ARCEE!!!!
I LOVE ARCEE, “HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT YOU BASTARD”
OH SHOOT JK I GUESS THEY REALLY DIDN”T TOTALLY WAKE HIM  UP LAST TIME I was wondering why he was just an arm
TITAN TIME!!!
Episode 16
To toast the flares off a neutron star....cute....
Wouldn’t it be cute if Kup was telling this story to a bunch of baby Cybertronians
Awh....Maccadam I’m sorry your old Titan had to re-awaken :(
“Too bad I won’t know how it ends” OH NO ARE YOU GUYS GONNA KILL OFF MACCADAM???? NO!!!!
Iaconus looks frickin RAD I’m sure Hasbro will make a killing off his toys
Speaking of I really hope they release Cyberverse on DVD in a bundle-pack
“War Titan, do NOT ignore me!” YEAH USE YOUR MOM VOICE ON HIM WINDBLADE!!!
LOVE THAT ROCK MUSIC
“This has never happened before” now THERE’S an interesting tidbit
OH NO....ITS THE OTHER TITAN....CROATON....
on the one hand, I’m SO glad we’re getting the Titan battle I crave, but on the other, CROATON NO!!!
TRIFORCE BEAM!!!
I love that Windblade is Jaeger-ing this frickin Titan solo
WHOOPS THERE GOES THE STADIUM
“Optimus had a fight of his own...with gravity!” oh how the mighty have fallen Optimus lmao
I wonder how this wonky universe would handle a flier
JUST THROW A BUILDING AT A TITAN, NBD
SOMEONE PLEASE CATCH ARCEE
Tumblr media
THANKS GRIMLOCK
THERE’S RATCHET Finally, I was wondering where he was
“Well it’s not my fault this won’t be a fair fight” OH SHOOT THERE IT IS!!! THERE IT IS
I can’t believe Starscream is trying to back-seat drive this fight lmao
SOUNDWAVE NO!!!! Oh thank goodness they’re ok
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
OH NO OH NO
IS THIS IT IS HE GONNA DIE?? MAC DONT GIVE IN TO FATE!!!  NO!!!
MAC NO!!!!!!!!!! MAC YOU DIDN”T HAVE TO DIE NO!!! YOU LITERALLY DID NOT HAVE TO STAND THERE AND GET BLASTED WHY DID YOU DO THAT!!!!!!!
“My last citizen...he is gone” FRICK IM GONNA START CRYING
Quints > Murdered Croaton's citizens most likely > Enslave Croaton > Inadvertently kill Iaconus' last citizen (WHICH HURT BECAUSE WE'RE MADE TO ASSUME IACONUS ONLY CARES ABOUT WAR BUT NO, HE LOVES HIS CITIZENS DEEP DOWN) > BEHEAD IACONUS LIKE, WHY YOU GOTTA STAB ME IN THE HEART LIKE THIS
Wheeljack you’re so smart but ALSO IM STILL CRYING OVER MACCADAM
“Hehe, you’re a nasty little fella” NICE JOB COWBOY
OH NO ALL THE SOUNDWAVES DANGIT I KNEW IT
AND HE”S A BIG LIAR HE DID HAVE SOME BLUE SOUNDWAVES
OH NO WHAT ABOUT WINDBLADE
HECK THAT”S SUCH A BAD PLACE TO STOP BUT I CANT WATCH ANY MORE EPISODES RN I GOTTA STAGGER THIS SERIES
6 notes · View notes