#guys is it gay to bring your coworker to a gay bar and say youre his wingman but then hang out all night

[unkat]

A little more for the Chilaios ems au. (please see Psiroller's beautiful Stop Smoking, We Love You! which takes place both before and after this)

Takes place after Chilchuck's bad call and talk with Laios and chatting about their backgrounds

Rating: T-M? Contains black humor about dying, alcohol

Chilchuck glances down at his watch, hovering outside his car instead of going into the bar. While he is very aware of his single status, he's not here for himself, but to give Laios the confidence boost he needs to meet someone. This isn't a date, far from it; he is determined to get rid of his coworker by the end of the night.

Another car pulls into the parking lot, a small sedan with a full backseat, a far cry from the thirty-year-old truck he knows Laios drives, followed by a black motorcycle. He looks back down at his phone, wanting to text someone out of boredom, but the only person he wants to complain to is supposed to already be here. Chilchuck wrinkles his brow, patting at his jeans pocket for his pack of cigs and lighter, when he hears footsteps approaching.

"Sorry, hope you weren't waiting for long. I had some trouble with the starter." Laios ruffles up his hair, flattened by the helmet he had been wearing. He still has on a leather jacket and is pulling off his riding gloves and sticking them in the pockets. Chilchuck is stunned for a few moments, a shock of interest crawling from his lizard brain to his hips before he can be indignant. "Seriously?" He scoffs, digging for a smoke, "A motorcycle? When you're a paramedic?"

"I can take a calculated risk," Laios replies, flushed but comfortable, "What about you, Mister nicotine reduces my stress?"

"That's different," Chilchuck waves off the concerns, leaving the pack in his pocket to cross his arms. "You see, I'm going to die nice and slowly, just like everyone else, while you run into a stop sign and get dismembered."

Laios has to put a hand over his mouth to prevent himself from a fit of laughter, "Stop it, that's not funny."

Chilchuck leans in, and Laios stands up more straight, letting his hand fall, and trying to keep the twitching grin from overtaking his attempt at a serious facade. It doesn't stop Chil from shrugging, keeping an even more serious face with ease, "If you do it cleanly, maybe we can get a discount on the coffin, since it only needs to be half the size if we fold you in half."

Laios leans against the car, towering over Chilchuck with a sharp smile, "A cardboard box will be cheaper, and faster than hospice." He shrugs, "Toss it into the woods and say a word or two for me, and you won't have to pay for a plot in a cemetery either."

Chilchuck whistles through his teeth, "I wouldn't need hospice when your sister killed me for feeding you to the pigs."

An amused smirk creeps up Laios lips, "Could be worse."

Any further words are cut off by the raucous laughter of another small group, looking a little older than some of the other patrons. Chilchuck nudges Laios, "Want to go inside?"

"Do we have to?" Laios jokes, at least, Chilchuck assumes he's joking.

"Yes, that's where the single guys are. And the drinks." He slaps Laios on the side of his leg teasingly, "Get going, kid."

Laios swallows and walks towards the bar, running into no resistance. Inside, the music is loud, with a pool table and darts in one of the side rooms, people already playing. Chilchuck takes the lead, confidently stepping through the jumbles of people until he gets to the bar, holding up two fingers. "A Miller and, do you have any stout? One of those."

Drinks in hand, they manage to find a quieter corner of the bar, Laios relaxing when they finally have chairs to drop into. "Well, we're here."

Chilchuck passes him the darker lager, keeping the Miller for himself, "C'mon, it isn't that bad. Don't let a bad night eight years ago keep you from having a good time."

Laios rubs his fingertips against the cold glass, "You have more experience with this than me."

"Me? Oh, no, not at all," Chilchuck takes a sip from his glass, "My ex-wife and I were together years before I was able to hang out in bars, legally at least. Never picked up anyone at a bar."

Laios lifts his own, "I mean, you already proved that you can pick me up. I'm sure you wouldn't have trouble with most of the guys, or girls, here."

His ears are red as he lifts the glass to his mouth, and Chilchuck watches his Adam's Apple bob as he drinks. One of the guys from the pool table wanders over, hovering for a moment before approaching the table. "Hey, are you using that chair?"

Laios blinks, "Oh, no! You can take it."

"Thanks!" The man, pleasant looking, with a wide smile living on his face long enough to leave the start of wrinkles at the corners of his mouth, grabs the back of the chair, "Do either of you play billiards?"

Laios and Chilchuck speak at the same time with different answers, "Oh, not rea-" "From time to time-"

Both go quiet simultaneously. The man nods in acknowledgment, whether he understood their responses or not. "Well, you're welcome to join us- my friend and I are looking for another couple of players.” He addresses Laios directly, making Chilchuck frown, “I could teach you if you wanted?" and then turns to include Chilchuck, "Or, you could, if you wanted to?"

Chilchuck's stomach unclenches and he turns towards Laios. "Well? Want to play some pool?"

He's pleased to see Laios' less than delighted expression, and then is horrified by his delight. Guiltily he shoos Laios away from the table, doing his job as wingman to get his friend to talk to new people, "You could at least help him move the chair. I'll watch your drink."

"Okay." Laios looks like a deer in the headlights as he stands, the other man letting him lift the furniture over towards the other room. Chilchuck drinks half his beer as he waits, shifting in his chair to watch as Laios drops it off by their table, and lingers to talk to both the man who stopped by their table and his other friend. Chilchuck pulls out his phone, scrolling again through his contacts, debating if he wanted to check in with Senshi, deciding against it, and opening up his Candy Crush to try and beat his next level.

“Hey.”

Chilchuck looks up, seeing a very tipsy young man, younger than Laios probably, standing next to the table, “Hey. You doing alright?”

“I was just about to ask you the same thing.” He cracks intro a wide smile, leaning against the table. Okay, maybe a little past tipsy, but as long as he isn’t driving it isn’t a problem. 

Chilchuck takes another gulp of his drink, “I’m doing alright, thanks for asking. You look like you’re having a good time, huh?”

“It’s getting better by the second,” The young man winks, as if Chilchuck couldn’t recognize a blatant flirt in front of his face. 

It’s flattering to be approached so quickly when he’s alone, by someone so much younger than himself, and it’s a nice distraction from the discomfort he feels watching Laios talk to the guy across the bar. He doesn’t mind messing around, but he has no interest in taking this kid home. Chilchuck rests his elbow on the table, chin in hand, “Better because of the company, or better because of the drinks?”

“I can get the drinks whenever.” The kid looks him up and down, and Chilchuck almost wants to hide, embarrassed by his casual wardrobe compared to Laios’ motorcycle getup and this stranger’s bright, flamboyant crop top, “But I’ve never seen you around here before. Are you here with a friend?”

“Yes.” Laios stands right behind him, holding two more beers, an annoyed look on his face. He roughly steps around the drunken visitor and drops into the chair next to Chilchuck, drinks in hand.

Chilchuck accepts the drink, mood brighter, “I thought you were going to play pool.”

“I wasn’t really feeling it.” Laios replies, offering no further explanation. The guy standing at the table looks back and forth between them quietly, before flourishing a hand towards himself, “Well, I’m Cecil, if you ever want to talk, or need me to introduce you to someone, I’m around here a lottttt.” He drops back from the table, “It was good to meet you!”

Chilchuck gives him a final wave before he trots away, to flirt with some other lonely soul most likely. Laios waits for him to get out of earshot before turning to Chilchuck, “What did he want?”

“Just being friendly, and drunk.” Chilchuck shrugs as he finishes off his first glass and pulls the new one closer. Laios mirrors him, quickly downing a few gulps like it’s a hot summer day with a cold glass of water, and licking the foam off his upper lip. Chilchuck leans back in his chair, teasing grin on his face, “So, what was his name?”

“…Sean. He was really nice. Asked if he could buy me a drink.”

A wave of irritation washes over him, slow and disappearing as quickly as it began, “Yeah? That is nice. Seemed like a good guy. You let him buy you those? Did you get his number?”

Laios shakes his head fervently, “Oh, no I got these for us. He and his friend, they both gave their numbers, in case we change our mind about the pool.”

“Just the pool?”

Laios twists his glass, “Yeah. Or if we ever wanted to talk.” He takes a drink.

“Hey, that’s basically a date!” Chilchuck slaps the lapel of his jacket with the back of his hand, somehow much more relaxed with a stomach full of beer and his friend clearly not very interested in the man who, in any situation, would be a catch.

Chilchuck manages to get a flash of a smile, Laios’ lips twitching upwards but never showing teeth, disappearing when he tracks down the other guy chatting up someone else at the darts, “What about that guy? Cecil?”

Chilchuck shrugs, “Nothing like that, probably just thought he could get a drink off of the older guy sitting alone at the bar. No number or anything, just messing around.”

Laios’ shoulders relax as he starts his second drink. “Some younger guys like the…well, you’re mature and distinguished, it’s not a surprise if someone wants to talk to you.”

Chilchuck snorts, “Distinguished? The fuck does that mean?”

Struggling for words, Laios makes a pained face. “Handsome? But not in a hot way. Well, yes, hot, but not cute, or conventionally attractive.” He’s losing his grip on what he’s trying to say, and Chilchuck lifts his cup to his face, slowly sipping, watching him fumble, “But a lot of people aren’t conveniently attractive, but you are still good to talk to, and charming—so the jeans and jacket, it is a really good look..?”

Chilchuck lets the silence speak before taking pity on Laios who is starting to look like his brain is going to melt out of his ears. “The jeans and the jacket? Laios, you are wearing a leather jacket, you ride a motorcycle. Half the guys here probably want you to take them home.”

“Well you look like you have a mortgage and, ugh.” Laios bounces his leg and takes a sip, buying himself some time, “You have this look, like you’re confident and caring and reliable. And you are, all of those things.”

Chilchuck finds himself at a loss for words, mouth opening and nothing coming out. He shakes his head. Get a grip. “You know, you didn’t have to butter me up THAT much, a little ‘no, those pants make your ass look great would have worked.”

Laios laughs, hand moves to cover at least some of his flushed face, “It looks better in the yoga pants.”

“Right back at you.” Chilchuck raises his glass. ”But none of these guys have seen me in yoga pants.”

Laios drops the hand covering his face to the table leaning against it, “Oh, I’m special huh? The one guy getting you to do the dippy yoga shit?”

“And don’t you forget it,” Chilchuck says firmly, waggling a finger in his direction.

Laios smiles and takes a swig of his drink in sync with Chilchuck, the sound of clattering billiard balls bouncing around and the murmur of voices the only sound as the music changes from one song to the next, a soft piano and crooning voice taking over.

”Oh shit, I haven't heard this song in forever." Chilchuck elbows Laios and gestures to the ceiling, as if the musicians live there. "Queen, I used to know all the words."

Laios looks at him with a grin, "Yeah? I've never heard it before."

Chilchuck gives him a flat stare. "Good Old Lover Boy? It's by Queen. You know, We will Rock You?"

Laios shakes his head. Chilchuck tries again, "What about We are the Champions? I Like to Ride my Bicycle? Bohemian Rhapsody, please Laios."

Laios smiles more bashfully after each unknown tune. "I didn't think that was a real band, Queen. Sounds like a drag joke."

Chilchuck thumps his drink on the table. "Seriously?!? You're gay, it's Queen. You aren't that young. How do you know Miseducation of Lauryn Hill and not fucking Queen?" 

Laios furrows his brows, "Listen, you can question me for knowing the MTV live album, but Miseducation is iconic." 

Chilchuck scoffs and rolls his eyes, managing to jump in at the chorus, crooning along with the grainy voice of Freddie Mercury, "Ooh love, ooh lover boy…" 

Laios smiles into his drink and he takes a sip, turning to face Chilchuck in his tipsy rendition. Chilchuck accepts his focus, becoming even more animated when he has his full attention.

"What're you doing tonight, hey boy?”

He leans closer to Laios, who leans back in surprise, but follows Chilchuck as he leaves his space, drawn in. Chilchuck tilts his head from side to side with the beat.

“Set my alarm, turn on my charm

That's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy”

It goes into a verse and Chilchuck bobs his head to the music. Laios leans close to be heard over the sound. "Where'd you learn this?"

Chilchuck turns to reply, "They're just a great rock band, I used to dance to it with the girls."

The pain of admitting to the past is softened by the drink and pleasure of Laios' company, and neither of them dwell on it. The distance that had been narrowed by dancing and talking continues to shrink. The last lines of the verse crackle over the speakers, "I'd like for you and I to go romancing, say the word, your wish is my command."

Chilchuck mouths the words of the chorus back in Laios' direction who sways back and forth in response to his enthusiasm, a fond smile crinkling the corners of his eyes as he is serenaded. Politely, he waits until Chilchuck has lost the lyrics before talking again, "So, what does me being gay have to do with it?"

Chilchuck throws up his free hand in exasperation. "Seriously?!? It's Freddie Mercury, he's a fucking gay icon. My dad wouldn't let me play it in the house because it would make me a fag."

Laios looks concerned. "Uh huh? Did it work?"

Chilchuck wiggles his hand non-committedly, "He was only half right, but it's just because Mercury was gorgeous in all the album art." 

Laios barks a laugh and covers it with his hand. Chilchuck's heart races as the soft bridge plays overhead, and Laios looks at him with the same eager fond intensity that he always does, like nobody else here exists. Chilchuck isn't making a very good wingman tonight. He has a sinking feeling as he realizes he doesn't WANT him to meet anyone... he doesn't want to drive home and sleep alone in his apartment after this.

He wishes there were a few more verses, so Laios would keep his eyes only on him, keep the mood for just a little longer. He's starving for it. Does Laios realize he's staring just as hungrily? Chilchuck wants him to stay here, keep things as they are, where he doesn’t have to think about his own loneliness, where his best friend won’t leave him to grow into a life he deserves. Like the life Jay found when she finally left him.

The tune is replaced by some other mid-two thousands pop tune and the bubble pops. Chilchuck grins and casually gestures over his shoulder. "I'm gonna grab a smoke, maybe something to eat. You want anything?"

[madlori]

@weewoo911 here ya go!

Buck orders another White Claw, checking his watch. Who knew that embracing your queer identity also meant losing any and all self-consciousness he might once have had over ordering White Claw, which was freaking delicious, thank you very much. Not that anybody would give him shit for it here - Wilde's was a queer-friendly cocktail lounge, less frenetic than a club but more casual than a restaurant. He'd been here four times in the last two months with various combinations of people; it was rapidly turning into the queer hook-and-ladder bar of Los Angeles.

"Waiting for someone, handsome?"

He glances to his right. there's a tall, bookish dude one stool down, cute in that Andy Samberg kind of way, giving Buck the old up-and-down. "Yeah, my boyfriend. He got hung up at work. He's on his way, theoretically."

"Mine, too. Mind if I join you?" he says, glancing at the stool between them.

"Sure, why not?"

The guy slid over, bringing his bourbon on the rocks with him. "I'm Peter."

"Buck. Nice to meet you. Your boyfriend keep you waiting a lot?"

Peter sighs. "He's in finance. There's always some crucial call, some last minute deal, some money-related emergency. They never seem that crucial to me, but what do I know, I'm just a high school history teacher." He shrugs. "I don't feel like I can bitch about it too much, it does pay for really nice vacations."

"Everything's a trade-off, isn't it?"

"You said it, man. What's your boyfriend do?"

"He's a firefighter."

Peter's eyes widened. "No shit? A real firefighter, not like a stripper firefighter?"

Buck laughed. "No, he's an actual firefighter. He also flies helicopters for the LAFD. Although between you and me, he could totally be a stripper firefighter if he wanted less job stress."

"Damn. Here I'm bitching about finance emergencies and your guy is out dealing with real emergencies." He leaned closer, a little smile on his face. "So. Is it as hot as everyone thinks it is?"

Buck smiled back. "So hot. You have no idea. I'm a big dude but he's bigger. He can throw me around and I love it. And he is ripped like you cannot believe."

Peter glanced down at him. "I mean, you look pretty ripped yourself."

"But he knows Muay Thai and all that. And is a pilot." He grinned. "I hit the jackpot, I think."

"And he's not a macho asshole? I've known some hypermasculine gay men and all of them have been giant assholes. And not in the good way."

"No, he's not like that at all. He's a sweetheart." Buck sighed. "He's...well. He's the first guy I've ever dated."

"Oh! So you're a baby gay."

"I'm bisexual, but yeah. He sort of...well, we were friends and suddenly we were flirting and then he kissed me and I went, oh."

Peter grinned. "Yeah. The 'oh' moment. I know it well. So how long have you been together?"

"Five months? Yeah, five months. Had to do the math."

"You seem pretty gone on the guy."

Buck blushed. "Yeah. I am."

"So, what do you do, then? While your hot pilot boyfriend is off being a firefighter."

Buck blinked. "Um. Oh. Well..." He chuckled at his own ridiculousness. "I am also a firefighter. That's how we met."

Peter stared at him, then laughed out loud, his head thrown back. "Oh my God, man. This is how bad you've got it for your boyfriend, you're here waxing rhapsodic about how he's a ripped firefighter and forget to mention that you are also a ripped firefighter?"

"Yeah, that's pretty silly, I guess."

"So he could be in a firetruck right now bragging to his coworkers about his hot firefighter boyfriend."

"I'm not also a pilot, though," Buck said, raising a finger.

"Technicalities."

"Sorry I'm late," Tommy said, swooping up from behind them.

"Hey!" Buck said, grinning up at him.

Tommy kissed his upturned mouth, a quick hello kiss. "I had to wait for Donato to get there and she got stuck behind an MVA."

"Lucy cannot stop messing up my love life," Buck joked.

Tommy was looking over at Peter, a mildly curious look on his face. "Hi," he said.

Peter was blatantly staring, then seemed to remember himself. "Oh hi, I'm Peter. We were just chatting while we waited for our respective boyfriends."

"Nice to meet you, I'm Tommy." He shook Peter's hand, then turned to the bartender to order a drink. Peter took the opportunity to meet Buck's eyes and mouth "Oh my GOD."

Buck nodded. "I know, right?" he mouthed back.

Tommy sat on Buck's other side, slipping his arm around his waist. "So what have you been talking about?" he said.

"Oh, you know, how firefighters are hot," Peter said.

Tommy winked. "I know. And I landed the hottest one," he said, leaning in to kiss Buck's temple.

"Funny, he said the same thing about you."

You know Buck is so into his hot beast of a firefighter boyfriend that I can totally see him gushing to some random about his sexy heroic firefighter boyfriend while completely forgetting to mention that he is ✨also a firefighter ✨😂

[miscfanfics]

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia: S11 E8

A Fan Fiction by MiscFanFics

Charlie Kelly x Female Reader

Warnings:

Smut

P in V, unprotected

Public Copulation

Language

18+ only - Minors DNI

Alcohol consumption

Minor spoilers for IASIP (season 11)

~~~Gifs do not belong to me!~~~

Today is Thursday, March 17th. Your coworker asked you to come out with her for drinks tonight to a place called Paddy’s Pub. An Irish Pub on Saint Patrick’s Day sounds like a claustrophobic nightmare, but you are desperate to get out of the house.

You don’t have work today, so you sleep in until noon. Let’s face it, you need the extra sleep to be able to make it all night without a midday nap. You lay in bed and scroll on your phone for an hour. When you finally get up, you take a shower, and with your towel draped around you, you search for an outfit. You own exactly 5 articles of clothing that are green. You settle on wearing jeans, a cardigan sweater, and a shirt adorned with a shamrock and text that reads, “Kiss Me I’m Irish.” Cliche as it may be, maybe it will help you get lucky tonight. You haven’t had a proper lay in months.

Just as you’re finishing getting ready, a blue bubble appears on your phone screen. “I’m here,” the text reads. You sigh, and shove your feet into a pair of Chuck Taylors on your way out the door. When you arrive at Paddy’s Pub, the place is only semi-packed. You and your coworker go right to the bar to order your first round. There is a tall, muscular guy manning the bar. He takes your drink orders, and completely ignoring them, he brings back 2 short beers. “Well, when in Ireland…” your coworker says. You clink your mugs together, and you both take a swig.

“That bartender is kind of hot,” she says.

You nod your head in agreement, “Yeah, but I think he’s gay.”

“How would you know?” she asks.

“Just a hunch,” you shrug. You notice another man appear, wearing the same “Paddy’s Irish Pub” shirt as the bartender. He’s a tad shorter than the first guy, but you find him to be much more attractive. You admire him for a moment: beautiful green eyes, brown hair, and brown facial hair to match. Though not as jacked as the tall guy, you consider him to be rather fit. He is so fine. He approaches the tall guy, they chat briefly, and they start walking out from behind the counter.

The tall guy turns to the crowded room and announces, “Attention, everybody. Irish honor system. Please serve yourselves. Put the money in the bucket. Thank you.” Everyone cheers, and the employees disappear behind a door in the back.

“At least now we won’t have to pay for these shitty beers we didn’t order,” you say, and your coworker laughs. You take another drink as you watch the door close behind the men. You two start chatting up a couple of cuties in the bar. They are funny and interesting, but they are getting sloshed pretty quickly due to the free booze. You turn to your coworker, “I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” you say.

As you knew she would, she responds, “Oooh! I’ll go with you.” You both primp yourselves in the mirror. “I was really enjoying those guys, but they’re too drunk now. I hope the hot bartender comes back,” she swoons.

“I hope so too,” you say, thinking of the shorter guy, and not the muscle man.

She turns away from the mirror and faces you, “Okay, how are we going to fairly decide who gets him. Should we let him choose?”

You snap out of your daze, “Oh, no I wasn’t talking about the taller bartender. Did you see the guy he left with? I’ve got my eyes on him.”

“Hell yeah, we’re gonna bone bartenders tonight! It’s like a Saint Patrick’s Day miracle!” she says, a little too loudy. You laugh and shush her.

“So, we just hang around here until they come back?”

“Yes, and when they do, we flirt, but be subtle. Unless they aren’t noticing us, then we shamelessly throw ourselves at them. Sound good?” she offers.

“That works! Playing hard to get is normally how I do it,” you state.

Outside the bathroom, you both see the tall guy heading for the door out of the pub. She approaches him. “Hey you,” she says seductively, and bats her eyelashes at him. “Leaving so soon? I was hoping to get to know you better,” clearly, subtly was out the window.

The tall guy brushes her off, he barely even looks at her. “I have to go to The Rainbow.”

“The Rainbow?” she echoes.

“Yeah, the gay bar. I have to see something,” he says, opening the door. He exits. She looks back at you, stunned but amused, as you approach her.

“You were right about him after all. Well, I’m 0 for 2. Let’s go to The Dugout down the street, some of my girl friends are going. Maybe I won’t strike out there.”

“You go ahead, I’ll meet you guys there in a while. I have to find my wallet,” you mention. You’re not sure what happened to it.

“Okay, but you should still try to sleep with your bartender, too,” she encourages with a wink.

People are leaving in packs despite it still being daylight out. This place is a dud. You search the entire building: under the tables, behind the bar, on the pool table, at the counter, in the bucket. Unfortunately, you’re unable to find your wallet. It’s a good thing you never carry cash on you. Meanwhile, you’re hoping your bartender will come back from wherever it is he went. Your coworker calls, she has made it to the second bar and found her friends. She wants to know when you’re coming and if you had a chance to shoot your shot with the other bartender. You tell her you couldn’t find your wallet and that your guy never came back. You accept defeat, and tell her you are on the way.

You head out of Paddy’s Pub, and start towards The Dugout, when you see the other bartender. He’s wearing a green spandex tank top, and he’s covered in glitter. He actually looks more attractive to you now. You’re happy for him, and you make a mental note to tell your coworker about it. At the new bar, you find her familiar face and join her table. You order a water.

“Get a mojito or something, it’s a national holiday,” she says, slurring her words. You notice she’s sporting a green beaded necklace that she wasn’t wearing before.

“I can’t find my wallet, remember?” you chuckle at her drunkenness.

“Ohhh yeah that. Are you sure you checked everywhere? Retrace your, um, steps. We went to the bathroom, remember that? Did you leave it next to the sink?”

“The bathroom! I didn’t even check there! Do you mind if I…” you start to say.

She shoes you away, and in a terrible, tipsy attempt at an Irish accent, she says, “May the luck of the Irish be with you!”

After you confirm that your coworker has a sober friend nearby, you decide to go back to Paddy’s to look for it again. You walk inside, not a soul to be seen. You hear someone digging around under the bar. You assume it’s the tall, glitter guy.

“Are you guys still open?” you call out to the shoes you see poking out from behind the counter. The noise lifts their knees off the floor and starts to stand.

You hear a man’s voice say, “Not really, sorry. We’re busy doing other stuff now.” Your cheeks turn pink, and they burn hot with timidity as a pair of green eyes meet yours.

You take a few steps toward him, your bartender. Seeing as how he disappeared for so long, you really didn’t think you’d run into him again. “I’m sorry. I-I was here earlier, and I think I left my wallet.”

“Oh, yeah, the leprechaun pickpocketed a bunch of people, but we got everything back from him. Bag’s right over there, go have a look,” he said. You kind of think he is kidding, but he is totally aloof. You dig through a duffle bag full of wallets at the far end of the counter.

“Can I ask you something?” you want to initiate a conversation with the gorgeous stranger.

“Go ahead,” he says, carefully studying a piece of paper.

“Why is your mouth green?” you ask.

“I’ve been drinking green paint,” he says.

“Why would you drink green paint?”

“It’s festive,” he says confidently. You find this charming for some reason, and you giggle. “Find it yet?” he asks.

“No, but I found a phone charger - I actually need this - a condom, and an unopened thing of Tic-Tacs. Is that okay if I keep the phone charger?”

“Take it,” he says, not looking up. He’s still looking down at his paper, becoming visually frustrated.

“Thanks, um, do you need help with something?” you ask, determined to stay.

“Actually, yeah. Can you read this to me? It got these new rat traps and like, I don’t know how to use them. And I can’t read. I’m not dumb, I promise, I’m just not good at words and shit.”

“I would never think you’re dumb.” He hands you the paper, he’s smiling at you. God, even his smile is stunning. He has perfect teeth. You read the instructions to him, and he starts to put the traps around the building. You follow him along, chatting casually. You both enter the women’s bathroom. After he places the trap, he comes out of the stall. “All done,” he says. He then presents a wallet to you, “This yours?”

“My wallet, oh my god! Thank you!” Without even thinking you pull him in for a hug, but you let go fast realizing this total stranger might not want you to touch him. “Oh, sorry. I’m just so happy you found this!”

“I’m glad,” he smiles. You follow him out of the bathroom, stopping as you approach the bar. You hand him the rat trap instructions, “Here’s that back.”

“Thanks,” he sets the paper down, and stretches his arm to the other side of the bar and grabs a beer. “And thanks for reading it for me. No one is usually willing to help me with Charlie work,” he comments, cracking open and sipping the beer.

“Charlie work?”

“Oh, um, right. Charlie, that’s my name, and I set the traps and clean the toilets and stuff. My gang calls it ‘Charlie work.’”

“Oh! Well, I’m happy to do it, Charlie,” you say sweetly. “Here, I’ll give you my number,” you grab a napkin and pen off a table nearby and write down your name and number. “Call me anytime, I’ll help you with Charlie work whenever you want,” you say, as you hand him the napkin. You want him to make the next move because up until now, you’ve just been trying to bait him into conversation, and he seems rather indifferent. You decide you should leave while the ball is in his court. You glance over at the door, “Anyway, I suppose I should head out, since you're done for today. Thank you again for finding my wallet.”

“Well, should I kiss you now then?” he asks. You are startled, and he must see it all over your face because he continues, “Y’know, like your shirt. ‘Kiss me, I’m Irish.’”

“Oh, right, the shirt… Wait, I thought you couldn’t read?” you lightheartedly question.

“Well, yeah, I can’t really. But I have worked in this bar for, like, a while. We see a fuckload of these shirts every year around this time, being an Irish pub and all that. So yeah, I guess I just remember what that says,” he explains.

“Fair enough,” you shrug. “But you can definitely kiss me… if you want to.” you say kind of nervously.

“Are you actually Irish? ‘Cause a lot of people who wear those aren’t really even Irish.”

“I am yeah,” you laugh, “on my father’s side.”

“Right, cool. I’ll kiss you then,” he says nonchalantly. He puts his hands on your waist. You put your arms around his neck. He leans in and gives you a tender, soft kiss on your mouth. You kiss him back.

“Charlie, you’re a really good kisser,” you say, delighted.

He lets out a small laugh, “If you think that’s good…” He grabs you passionately, kissing you harder now. He slips his tongue inside of your mouth. You allow him to discover your mouth, your tongue dancing with his. You are moaning quietly. This is the most action you’ve had in a minute. Things were getting hot and heavy. You and Charlie were groping each other and dry humping. You could feel his hard-on pressed up against you. “You wanna…” he starts to speak. Looking into your eyes, he licks his lips. He has this innocent puppy dog look on his face.

You wish that you could play hard to get, that you could watch him beg for a moment, but you weren’t sure how into you he was. You had to take the opportunity now, “Oh god, yes.” He continues French kissing you.

You can’t believe this is happening, your groin tingles. You take your sweater off, then grab at the sides of his shirt. He parts from your mouth for just a second so you can remove your respective shirts. Then, he immediately puts his lips back where they were. He grabs you by your hips, and guides you backwards toward the counter. He helps you up onto a barstool, and sinks into your body between your legs, his lips never leaving yours. He’s kind of sloppy, but you find him so incredibly sexy that it’s turning you on even more.

You wrap your legs around him, and you kick your shoes off behind his back. You take one of his hands off your hip, and you bring it to your breast. With his other hand, he reaches around to your back. In no time, he has your bra unclasped, and you discard it. He massages your breasts, paying special attention to your nipples. You are moaning, and your underwear are drenched. He puts his face on your breasts, kissing and sucking so gently.

At the same time, he glides his hands down your body, feeling and cherishing every curve. He tugs at your jeans. You reach down to undo your button, so he undoes his own. His pants fall to the floor. You wiggle your pants and underwear off of your bottom, and he pulls them off the rest of the way.

Your mouths remeet. He works his shoes off, and gets the pants away from his ankles. He still has his boxers on, concealing his rock hard cock. You scoot closer to the edge of the barstool to grind up on his clothed penis with your bare pussy. You move your hips side to side ever-so-slightly, creating friction between the two of you. His head falls back and he begins to moan. You plant kisses down his neck, and you suck on the skin near his collarbone, still grinding your hips. “You like that?” you tease.

“I fucking love it,” he breaths out. He puts one hand on the back of your head, and pulls you in to kiss you again. His other hand starts at your knee and works its way up. His fingers lightly tickle the sensitive skin on your inner thigh. You are quivering beneath his touch. He moves his finger through your folds, he stops at your clit and pleasures it. Your back arches, and your head falls back, almost resting on the countertop. He kisses your neck. “Fuck me, Charlie,” you whisper. His finger penetrates you. You let out a loud moan. He slips a second finger inside you, and you grab his face for some more mouth-to-mouth. He moves his fingers in and out of you a few times, hitting your g-spot with every motion. “Fuck yes!” you scream as you orgasm.

When you’re done coming, he goes over to the bag of wallets, “Gimme a second.” You hop down off the stool, and make yourself comfortable on the pool table. “Got it,” he walks over to you, a condom in hand.

“We don’t need that,” you say, bringing him back to his place between your legs and pulling him in for a kiss.

“Um, yeah, okay. Why?” he asks in between kisses.

“I’m clean, are you clean?”

“Yeah, I think so.” You take his word for it.

“Then we don’t need that, and you can just pull out,” you say, nibbling at his ear and brushing your lips across the adorable freckles on his shoulder.

“Cool, whatever works, man,” he comments casually. He finally tears his boxers off as he lets the condom fall to the floor. You lay down on your back, he climbs up on the pool table and hovers over you. He rubs your wetness on his throbbing member. He enters you, and steadily goes deeper and deeper. Once he’s all the way in, you both quietly cry out in ecstasy. He feels so good.

“You’re like, super tight,” he says. You constrict around his erection a little tighter. “Fuck!” he expresses with delight. You smile devilishly at him, he is in awe of you. You flip him onto his back. You loosen up, and ride him. He smacks your ass; his hand lingers, then he squeezes. “Make yourself come,” he demands.

As you bounce up and down on him, he props himself up with one arm, and he sucks on your breasts some more. You rest your chin on the top of his head, and wrap one arm around his back; your other hand grabs onto his hair. “I’m close, I’m really close,” you gasp. He moves his lips to your mouth, and puts his free hand on your nipple and plays with it. You kiss him for a moment, then you come up for air. He bites your lower lip. He’s still tickling your breast, and you’re still humping him. “Oh fuck, Charlie!” you moan as you come for the second time.

Quickly, he flips you over, returning you to your back. He thrusts into you again and again. He begins to slow down; he’s trying to edge you, or himself. Or he’s giving you both time to catch your breath. It doesn’t matter, he’s still inside of you, and that’s all you care about. “This feels nice,” you whisper. He brings his face down to yours, you kiss each other very softly.

“You feel so good, baby,” he says. Then, he gradually moves faster and faster. For several minutes he pounds you hard and rhythmically.

“Don’t stop!” you shout. Your knees quake, and you both climax simultaneously. He pulls his dick out of you at the very last second. Shaking himself, he comes all over your stomach. You breathe a satisfied sigh as you scoot over closer to the edge of the woolen pool table cloth to make room for Charlie. He flops down beside you, and takes a deep breath.

He stares up at the ceiling, “Wow! You were incredible!” He turns his head to look at you. He checks you out from head to toe, and back up.

“So were you,” you say as you nervously toy with your necklace.

“Let me get you something for that,” he says gesturing towards his load on your skin. You help each other clean up the mess. You walk over to the pile of clothes and toss him his boxers. You pull on your own underwear, and find your pants. He picks up his shirt, and he throws your shirt over your head as you are trying to put your jeans on, cracking himself up. You laugh with him, but you throw his pants as hard as you can, he laughs harder. He’s dressed, you're almost done. He helps you put your sweater on. “You’re really hot, we should do that again sometime,” he says.

“Anytime. You have my number,” you remind him, bashfully, and he kisses you once more.

[thetravelerwrites]

Urgan (Orc)

Rating: Mature Relationship: Male Human/Male Orc Additional Tags: Exophilia, Monster Boyfriend, Orc, Male Reader, MLM, Gay Reader, Football Captain, College, Friends to Lovers Content Warnings: Alcohol Poisoning, Children, Kids, Pregnancy, Unwanted Pregnacy, Mention of Abortion, College Drop-Out, Strong Language, Drug Use, Angst, Super Angst, ALL THE ANGST Words: 4385

A super duper angsty commission by the wonderful @severedreamerbeard​​! Urgan is the captain of his college football team and all around cool dude. He's an extremely reliable guy with his whole life ahead of him... until the woman he's been dating winds up pregnant, which turns his entire world upside down. The reader, Urgan's best friend, tries to help as much as he can while watching Urgan's life fall apart. Please reblog and leave feedback!

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Urgan had been your best friend since preschool. You were human and he was an orc, but you were both jocks growing up, both in sports, both athletic. He’d been there with you through all the major events in your life. He was there when your parents divorced, when you came out as gay in middle school, and when the teammates who had once been friends started bullying you because of it. He was always there.

You hoped you had been as good a friend to him as he had been to you. You were there when his dad died, when his mom remarried someone he hated, and when his highschool sweetheart cheated on him. After all that, the two of you were closer than brothers.

College life was easier on both of you. You both had gotten a sports scholarship and found a friend group that was a lot of fun to hang out with. Parties were epic, classes were less so, but you were living the life and loving every second of it.

Then it changed. Not for everyone, not even for you. Or at least, it didn’t have to. You could have made different choices. It would have been far easier if you had, you were sure. But…

“How long have you been dating Kelly?” You asked him over a beer. The two of you were sitting out on the front porch of a house party currently in full swing.

“Who?” He snorted, half-asleep. He’d pulled an all-nighter the day before preparing for his psych exam.

“Kelly,” You said, pointing into the open door at the girl wearing a halter with a half-empty vodka bottle in her hand, some of which she’d spilled on her chest, grinding on another girl who was sucking the vodka off of her clavicle.

“I wouldn’t say we’re ‘dating’,” He replied, throwing back a large swig of his beer. “Fucking, yes. I’m not trying to date anyone right now. I don’t have the time.” He threw his beer bottle into a large trash barrel and stood up. “Where’s Derek? He owes me fifty bucks.”

“For what?” You asked, standing up and following him through the house. He slapped Kelly’s ass as he passed her on the way inside, and she laughed.

“I borrowed it to buy coke three weeks ago,” He said.

“Didn’t he almost OD?” You asked.

“Yeah, but that ain’t my fault, I want my money,” Urgan said, muscling his way through the crowd.

“Don’t be an asshole, bro,” You said, still following him.

“I’m not being an asshole! It’s not like he learned anything, I bet you five bucks he’s doing coke right now.”

“Yeah, I’m not taking that bet,” You laughed. “I don’t know of a time when he’s not on coke. I think he was high when we first met.”

“That’s my point. You know I’m cool about that stuff normally, but it’s affecting his performance on the field,” Urgan grumbled. “I’m team captain, and if he doesn’t straighten up, I have to kick him off the team, friend or not. We lost to E.U. because of him.”

You grimaced. E.U. had been your school’s rival for generations. The loss hurt and was a huge blow to Urgan. It didn’t help that it was televised nationally.

“If you kick him off the team, the other guys will be pissed,” You reasoned.

“I know that,” He said grumpily. “But managing the team internally is my job. If I don’t do something about it, coach will either demote me or kick me off with him for not handling it when I should have. I can’t afford to lose my scholarship over some douchebag’s coke habit.” He made his way into the garage at the opposite end of the house and smacked a seated Derek on the back of the head. “Hey, Derek! Money! Now!”

“Dude, back off!” Derek protested. “I’ll get it to you when I get it, damn!”

“Not good enough,” Urgan said, kicking the mirror that was in front of Derek. Powder went flying.

“Hey!” Derek said, standing up and taking a swing at Urgan. Urgan ducked and caught Derek’s arm, pinning it behind him. He was always quick.

“Quit the coke or quit the team,” Urgan said, snarling. “We’re not losing another game because you’re too high to play.”

“The fuck are you talking about, man?” Derek said, struggling. “Don’t blame that shit on me! It’s not my fault you can’t organize your team!”

“I’m serious, dude,” Urgan said, pushing Derek to the ground. “I’m not getting punished for you. Straighten up or fuck off.”

“Suck my dick, asshole,” Derek said. He jerked his chin at you. “Or get your boyfriend to do it.”

Words like that were water off your back at this point, but it always riled Urgan up. You could already see him tensing.

“Let it go, dude,” You said, pulling him back. “Derek, seriously, you’re bringing the whole team down. Lay off the drugs, at least until after the championship.”

“Get the fuck out of my house if you’re going to act all high and mighty,” Derek said, pushing past you. “And you can forget that fifty bucks. It’s all over the ground now.”

Urgan’s fists were balled up and he was breathing hard.

“He’s not going to stop,” Urgan said.

“Come on, dude,” You said, smacking him on the shoulder. “You’re not going to accomplish anything here. Take it to the field. Show him why you’re captain.”

“I guess,” He said. “I’m hungry, man, let’s grab something.”

“Sure,” You said. “Kelly’s coming over to your place after the party, though, right?”

“Yeah, but she won’t be any shape to do anything but sleep. She knows where the key is, she’ll be fine.”

Finals were coming up, and most people were holed up in their rooms or dorms studying. Urgan was a decent student and never really worried about tests, though you hadn’t heard from him in a couple of days, which was odd. He could have been working a lot; he had a part-time job to pay for his own studio apartment. He said the dorms were too small for him.

“Urgan? No, I haven’t seen him in a week.” Joey said. Joey was a coworker from the bar where Urgan worked and also an ex-boyfriend of yours. You bumped into him at the university’s library while looking for Urgan. Urgan hadn’t answered his door when you went to check on him, so you figured he had to be here.

“Is he sick?” You asked, taking out your phone. You’d texted him awhile ago and you saw that he had seen it, but he hadn’t responded.

“I dunno,” Joey said. “All I know is that he asked the boss for some personal time. It could just be finals getting to him.”

You frowned. “Hmm… I’m going back to his apartment. He’s never been this quiet before. Something’s not right.”

“Tell him to come back to work. All the girls try to flirt with me when he’s not there. I need him to be my shield.”

You laughed and waved him off, heading out.

“Urgan!” You called, knocking insistently on his door. “Open the door! Are you alright?”

No answer. Frustrated, you got the spare key that was hidden in a slit of the doormat and unlocked the door. His apartment was dark and looked normal. Urgan was a fairly tidy guy, and nothing was really out of place.

“Urgan!” You called again, walking around the partition that obscured his bed. There he was, passed out on top of his blankets. There were empty bottles of liquor everywhere. Your heart stopped.

“Oh, fuck, please don’t be dead,” You said, crawling on the bed to slap him in the face. “Urgan, wake up!” His skin was cold, which scared the shit out of you, but after a minute feeling for a pulse on his neck you found a heartbeat, and you could see him breathing very slowly, so at least he was alive. But he wasn’t responding to your attempts to rouse him.

“Shit.” You took out your phone and called and called emergency services.

“911, what’s the nature of your emergency?”

“Hey, I need an ambulance, I think my friend has alcohol poisoning.” You said quickly, hoping it was intelligible, and gave them the address.

“Okay, sir, how long has this been going on?”

“I’m not sure, I just found him. I haven’t heard from him in days. He’s got a pulse, but he won’t wake up.”

“Is he cold to the touch?”

“Yes.”

“Is he breathing?”

“Slowly, but yes.”

“Can you make sure his airway is clear?”

You put the phone down and opened his mouth. There didn’t seem to be anything in the way.

“It’s clear,” You said.

“Alright, sir, I’ve got an ambulance on the way. Do me a favor and turn him on his side and bend the leg that’s on the top. Keep his airway clear and keep an eye on his breathing.”

“Okay,” You said, doing as the operator said and trying to keep calm.

The ambulance arrived within minutes, and after several moments of the EMTs attempting to wake him and failing, they loaded him in the rig. You were able to ride with him to the hospital. They took you both to a room, and you stood back as they began hooking Urgan up to all sorts of tubes and wires. They put a tube in his mouth because his breathing was weak and slowing down. They put him on a heavy saline drip and debated whether or not to pump his stomach. Eventually, they left him to rest and you sat with him.

“What the fuck is happening with you, man?” You asked him quietly as he slept.

Eventually, you fell asleep, and when you woke up, they were taking the air tube out of his throat. Urgan was awake and groaning in discomfort as it was removed.

“Dude, what the hell?” You said, standing up.

His eyes were bloodshot and he looked extremely sick, but at least he was awake. He waited for the doctors and the nurses to leave so that it was just you and him before he answered you.

“Kelly’s pregnant,” He said hoarsely. “It’s mine. She’s sure of it.”

“Oh, shit,” You said, sitting back down in the chair next to him. “I thought you used protection.”

“I do,” He said in frustration. “The condom must have broken or something. She told me she was on the pill. I don’t know what happened. I’m so fucking screwed.”

“You may not be,” You said, trying to comfort him, but you knew he was right. Being team captain meant that you put the team before everything. If you had another priority, you couldn’t be team captain. Not to mention the scandal of having a kid during the height of his college career would destroy his reputation and make him seem irresponsible. A baby right now was going to ruin him.

“Don’t bullshit me. I can’t show my face at school. Coach is going to kick my ass as soon as he finds out. My life is over.”

“Don’t talk like that, man,” You said. “What’s Kelly saying about all this? Has she told anyone?”

“No, not yet,” He said, covering his eyes. “Well, she hadn’t when I started drinking, but I don’t know if she has now.”

“She wants to keep it?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t get farther than ‘I’m having a baby and it’s yours’. And then I just started drinking and didn’t stop.”

“How far along is she?”

“Three months, she said.”

“How does she know it’s yours?”

“I was the only person she was sleeping with at the time. We were thinking about dating seriously, but it didn’t work out that way.”

“Do you believe that?”

“I don’t know. We’ll find out, I guess.”

You frowned deeply. “She’s… been partying pretty hard in the last three months.”

Urgan rubbed his face. “I know. I’m scared shitless the kid is going to be born fucked up.”

“Do you… think you can talk her into giving it up? For adoption, I mean? She doesn’t seem like mom material.”

“I don’t know,” He said. “I don’t know what she’ll do.”

“What about…” You hesitated to mention it. “What about an abortion?”

“That’s her decision,” He said vaguely. “It’s her body.”

“Do you want me to talk to her?”

“No, don’t,” He said. “I’ll do it when I’ve got my head on right.”

“Dude, look where you are right now,” You said, gesturing vaguely. “Let me at least call her.”

He sighed. “Fine.”

You took Urgan’s phone, which was in his back pocket when he was brought in, and called Kelly. She was surprised to hear about Urgan’s condition and said she’d come up to the hospital.

She arrived an hour later and you gave them some privacy to talk. It was a while, so you went to grab a soda. When you came back, Kelly was leaving with tears on her face. You went in and saw Urgan sitting up in bed. His eyes were red from crying.

“Hey man, are you okay?”

“No,” He said, wiping his face and sniffing. “She’s going to keep it. I’m leaving school.”

“What?” You said, coming around. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m gonna finish out the semester but I’m leaving before the baby is born. I have to find a better job. I’m hoping I can come back when the baby is a bit older, like when they start school or something, and finish my degree.”

“But you only have a year left! Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

“No!” He shouted. “I don’t want to leave school! I’ve been dreaming of this scholarship since I was a kid! It was my dad’s dream! But I’m not going to be a deadbeat! I have to find a decent job before the baby is born. I don’t have a choice.”

You were stunned to silence and just listen to him breathe through his tears.

“Are you and Kelly staying together?”

“Fuck no,” He said vehemently. “We both know that would be stupid. She’s going to stay in school as long as she can. She’s supposed to be due in winter sometime, so I should have enough saved up by then to give her for the baby, to make sure they’re comfortable.” He scowled. “I’m sure Derek is going to be thrilled. I can just see the look on his face now.”

“Don’t worry about that jackass,” You said. “Dude, I… Is there anything I can do to help out?”

He shook his head. “Kelly and I are going to keep this quiet until the end of the semester so that we don’t have to deal with anyone bullshit. After that, we’ll start telling people.”

“You’re not going to tell your mom?”

“Not yet. I can’t face her yet. She’s going to be so disappointed in me.” His tears began to fall again, and all you could do was put a hand on his shoulder and be there for him.

“I won’t say anything to anyone,” You told him. “I’m still your best friend, no matter what. If you need anything, you know I got you.”

“Thanks, man,” He said, his voice breaking.

Urgan finished out school as he planned, barely scraping a passing grade, and then notified everyone that he wouldn’t be returning. As expected, his coach was furious, his mom was disappointed, and the team was dumbfounded. Derek was the only person who seemed to be enjoying the situation.

During summer, he asked for an amniocentesis, both to prove whether or not Urgan was the father, and also to check for any genetic conditions, since Kelly’s family had a history of genetic diseases. Urgan was hoping that she was lying about only sleeping with him around the time she conceived and that he would wind up not the father so he could go back to school, but the test was conclusive. The baby was his.

Urgan found work pretty quickly at a seafood processing plant near town. It was grueling work and it didn’t pay much, but it was a full-time job and had healthcare benefits, which was the best he could hope for in these circumstances. He began saving immediately to buy clothes and diapers for his kid, which he recently found out was a little girl, and was in frequent contact with Kelly. He didn’t attend any of the doctor’s visits at Kelly’s request. Not that he wanted to be there in the first place.

You continued with college and partied like a normal college guy, stayed on the football team, and was promoted to captain. Urgan seemed happy for you and gave you pointers on leadership. If he resented you for it, he gave no sign.

Many of Urgan’s old friends, mostly team members, dropped him immediately. They no longer invited him to parties or events, and when you mentioned inviting him, they shot you down. As far as you knew, the only one who still stood by him was you, and you couldn’t be there as much as you wanted to as you now had responsibilities with the team.

Even still, if he called, you dropped what you were doing and went over. You promised you’d be there, and you were going to keep that promise. He was your best friend and you were going to stand with him. No matter what.

Urgan’s daughter, Roga, was born in November. She was small, even for a half-orc. You were there in the waiting room for the birth with the grandparents. It might have been your presence that stopped them from being at each other’s throats; the animosity in the air was palpable. Kelly’s dad was there, looking not-best-pleased at Urgan’s mom, despite her being nearly twice his size, but no harsh words were said.

Urgan came out in the full paper surgical outfit, holding the baby. He even seemed happy.

“Here she is,” He said, holding her out for the grandparents to see.

“Oh, isn’t she precious,” Urgan’s mom, Reana, said. “She’s got your eyes, Urg.”

“Yeah,” He said, smiling. “She looks a bit like dad, don’t you think?”

“She does!” Reana said brightly. “That nose definitely looks like his.”

The grandparents took turns holding the baby, and then went in to see the mother.

“Hey,” Urgan said to you, the only one left in the room. “Do you want to hold her?”

You chuckled nervously. “I dunno, man, I’ve never held a baby.”

“Neither have I, before today,” He said. “You don’t have to. I just wanted to offer since everyone else got to.”

“Yeah, but they’re family.”

“You’re family, too,” He said, looking at you like you were being an idiot.

You smiled a little and held out your arms, and Urgan carefully lay the baby into them. She was small and squishy and her face was all wrinkly. Babies all looked like potatoes to you. But she reached out and yawned and grabbed at your hand, and you couldn’t help but smile.

“She’s cute,” You said, letting her grip your finger.

“Yeah,” He said, grinning.

“How’s Kelly?”

“She hates my guts, but she’s okay.” Urgan reached out to take the baby, and you handed her over. “I should take Roga back. The lactation specialist wants to work with her.”

“I didn’t know there was a such thing as a lactation specialist,” You said with a laugh.

“Oh, yeah,” Urgan said. “The last nine months have been extremely informative.”

You snorted. “I bet.”

He took the baby back to Kelly and you sat in the waiting room, feeling a little awkward. Why were you here? You weren’t really family. You knew you were supporting Urgan, but… he didn’t really need you there right now. He seemed fine. Happy even, considering the circumstances. Maybe… maybe you should go. You really didn’t belong here.

You texted Urgan to let him know something had come up and to call you if you needed him, and he told you that it was okay, and to be careful going home. As you left, you sighed in relief. But you also felt a little guilty.

Six months later was graduation. You finished top of your class and made valedictorian. You knew that if Urgan had still been in school, he’d have gotten that honor, but…

Urgan didn’t come to graduation, and you understood why. Kelly crossed the stage and accepted her diploma, and you couldn’t help feel a little resentful at her, despite the fact that it wasn’t her fault that Urgan wasn’t there, either. They really had done everything they were supposed to do--used protection, used birth control, was careful--but things just happen sometimes. Even still, it felt like Urgan was the one who had sacrificed the most and had gotten nothing in return.

You managed to get a job at an accounting firm almost immediately after graduation. It was a boring job but the money was good. You were hoping it would be a stepping stone to a better career later.

Since getting the job, you hadn’t really seen or spoken to Urgan much. You were still his best friend, but… you had your own life to live. You felt guilty about it, but your world couldn’t stop just because his had.

Urgan was still working at the fish processing plant, working long hours to support Roga. Urgan was basically paying Kelly’s rent and bills plus everything Roga needed for both homes, since he took her on the weekends from Friday night to Monday morning, when he dropped her off on the way to work.

However, a month after graduation, Urgan called you in a panic.

“Kelly’s gone,” He said. “She’s left. I got a text from her saying she’s gone to Canada.”

“What?” You asked in disbelief. “Did she take Roga?”

“No, I’ve got her here.” He said, his voice shaking. “When she texted me, I was scared she had run off with the baby, but she left Roga with her stepdad. I just picked her up and I’m bringing her back home with me.”

You felt terrible for hoping Kelly had taken Roga with her to Canada. Even though you knew it wasn’t Roga’s fault, all you wanted was for Urgan’s life to go back to normal. You just wanted him to have the things he should have had if Roga hadn’t been born. And you hated yourself for thinking that.

“Are you okay?”

“I don’t know,” He said. He sounded extremely distressed. “Can you meet me at my apartment, please? I need someone to talk to. You’re all I have left.”

“Yeah, of course, I’ll be right there,” You said, picking up your keys.

“Thank you,” He said, and then hung up. He was audibly crying.

You made it to Urgan’s apartment before he did, and you saw him step out of the elevator carrying a ton of baby stuff in one arm and hauling Roga in her carseat in the other.

“Can you take her, please?” Urgan said. He looked pale and in shock.

“Yeah, of course,” You said, taking her carrier and looking inside. She was sleeping with a stuffed griffon clutched in her baby hands. “Is she okay?”

“I think so,” He said, unlocking his door. His apartment was strewn with kid stuff. It was so much different than the last time you’d seen it.

“I’m sorry about the mess,” He said, dropping the load he was carrying in the middle of the floor.

“Dude, I don’t care about the mess, are you okay?” You asked.

“I…” He ran his fingers through his hair. He was visibly shaking. “I don’t know if I can do this alone. I had accepted being a dad, but I don’t know if I can be… the only parent. I… I don’t know any babysitters for when I’m working. I don’t… is she off breastmilk? When was her last check up? When is she supposed to see the doctor again? Kelly didn’t tell me those things because I.. I figured she had it handled. I was making sure they had everything they needed. I didn’t think I’d…”

“Okay, calm down,” You said. “Roga is fine. You can find all of that stuff out. I’ll help, I’ll help however I can, okay?”

“Okay,” He said, sitting on his couch heavily. “Okay.” He reached down into her carseat and unstrapped her, putting her against his shoulder, clutching her as if she was a warm stone and he was freezing. He was certainly shaking like he was.

This was the first time you’d seen Roga since she was born. Now that she’d had a chance to grow, she did look a lot like Urgan. It made you feel worse for resenting her.

“Look, can you watch her for a few minutes?” He asked suddenly. “I’m almost out of formula and I didn’t expect to have her right now. I was going to go Thursday to stock up. I don’t want to run out.”

“I…” You hesitated.

“Please,” He begged quietly. “Please. Ten minutes. I promise.”

You sighed. “Okay.”

He transferred Roga from his shoulder to yours. Uncertainly, you gripped her firmly.

“I’ll be right back, I promise,” Urgan said, and he was out the door.

There was a rocking bassinet near Urgan’s bed behind the divider, and you settled Roga in it, staring down at her peacefully sleeping form.

“I wish I didn’t hate you,” You told her, tears welling up in your eyes and falling down your cheeks. “But you took everything from him. I know it’s not your fault, but it doesn’t change anything. He’ll never be the man he should have been because of you.”

Roga sighed in her sleep and snugged into her bed without waking. You did nothing but sit on Urgan’s bed and stare at her the entire time Urgan was gone, allowing yourself to hate her and Kelly and the team at school and everyone who turned their back on Urgan when he needed them the most. When Urgan returned, your tears had dried, and you left.

Roga was still sleeping.

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Thanks for reading!

My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[purpleorchid85]

Buddie Fic Rec List (Part 1)

5 Times Eddie & Buck Knew They Were Dating & 1 Time Everyone Else Figured It Out 

by Onlymystory

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24012025

A Diaz By Any Other Name (Should Be A Buckley) 

by CaseyStar

Summary: Evan's lack of confidence in where he fit with the firefam and over how easily Bosko was brought in to take his place, rears it's ugly head when he hears about how Eddie escaped the warehouse when the police arrived.

AO3:https://archiveofourown.org/works/21783802

And They Were Roomates

By cherishingstydia 

Summary: Buck needs a place to live and Eddie has a guest room.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22828072

 And...They Were Zoommates

By emquin

Summary: Buck and Eddie work for the same company but have never met until working from home during the covid-19 pandemic has them using zoom video conferences.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23420866

 Asked, Offered, Given, (He's) Taken by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

Summary: People like to flirt with Buck on calls. It kind of makes Buck uncomfortable. And that makes Eddie frustrated.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24762892

 Be My (Secret Santa) baby

By smartbuckley

Summary:  It's this year's secret santa, and as Buck is about to open his sixth gift, he remembers the previous gifts and his feelings about them.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21809878

 Bi Me A Drink 

by Wolves_of_Innistrad

Summary:  Hen takes the firefam out to a gay bar as a means of getting Eddie and Buck together. Fic contains lots of flirty Bi!Buck, Jealous and handsy Eddie and some extra twists.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21414100

 Breathe You In

By Pline

Summary: Eddie can’t stop staring. This selfie is going to be the death of him. Buck is shirtless, and giving the camera an intense look that leaves Eddie panting. Or Buck sends a picture that tips their relationship into something new.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25070953

 Bruises and Bitemarks 

By Tarialdrion

Summary: When Chimney invited Buck to see his first live MMA fight, Buck had no idea that the night would end with him on his knees and the most gorgeous man he's ever seen happily devouring his mouth. Life is full of surprises.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24800731

 Buck's Not-At-All-Secret Admirer 

by R_E_R6

Summary: Buck has a 'secret admirer'. Everyone knows it's Eddie, even Buck.

Eddie has a plan though.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22650847

 Calendar Shoot 2.0 

by Araloth

Summary: It’s that time of year again, time for submissions to the annual LAFD sexy firefighter calendar. Buck is eager to try again, only this year he plans on actually taking Eddie up on all his free photography advice…

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21229880

 Check Yes or No 

by rebeccaofsbfarm

Summary: Eddie finds a note in Christopher's backpack and realizes that his son has a girlfriend. When he tells Buck, he has a reaction Eddie didn't anticipate.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24783445

Cruiser Bruiser 

by FandomLife54

Summary: A close call on the side of the freeway has Eddie reevaluating his relationship with Buck, particularly how strained it's become due to Eddie's anger since the lawsuit. Some domestic love and more than a few heart to hearts have Eddie confessing things he should have a long time ago.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24126379

Darling It's Better (Down Where It's Wetter) 

By onlymystory  

Summary: "Who the hell is that?" asks Buck. Like he doesn't know exactly who that is. Like a week ago he wasn't enjoying one of the best fucks of his life with Eddie Diaz. Or the reason for Buck's surprise at the new recruit isn't quite for the reasons everyone thinks.

AO3:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/23197093?view_full_work=true#main

 Dirty Little Secret

By smartbuckley

Summary: Buck and Eddie have been sneaking around together hooking up but it has never been just about sex for Buck and he keeps asking Eddie for it to be more. But Eddie doesn’t want anyone to know, even though he does love Buck (he’s scared) and can’t bring himself to talk about it. Buck gets upset about being Eddie’s dirty secret and cuts off their hookups, it hurts too much to be that close. He won’t let Eddie touch him even platonically. Eddie realizes he needs to do something about it.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21498331#main

 Don’t Hate The Player, Hate The Game

By FancyfulOfLife

Summary: One day one too many firehouse 118 betting pools are going to bite them in the booty. Today just might be that day.

AO3:https://archiveofourown.org/works/22129198

 Don’t Need To Question The Reasons. I’m Yours.

By technicallyi’mawriter

Summary: The one where Buck is his flirty self and Eddie reminds him that he is his and his alone.

AO3:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/24207109#main

Dosed, Again

By ApplepieandCinnamon

Summary: In retrospect, eating cookies that clearly inebriated strangers gave you as a thanks had not been a good idea. Well, you’re always smarter in hindsight. Sleep deprived Eddie Diaz is a danger to society and ends up drugging both himself and his best friend.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24742834

Eddie 'I Get What I Want' Diaz

By EdithBlake

Summary: Buck encounters an ex of his on a call. It puts things into perspective for Eddie.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22488685

 Eddie Hates The New Guy

By EdithBlake

Summary: Rick is Hen's replacement while she is undergoing investigation. Eddie hates him. He especially hates how Rick looks at Buck like he is a piece of meat.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21438241

 Eddie's Not-So-Secret Feelings 

R_E_R6

Summary: 5 times Eddie says sweet things about Buck in Spanish so Buck doesn't find out he's in love with him +1 time Eddie realises Buck speaks Spanish and knew all along. With special guest stars: Eddie's entire family.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21729094

 Eddie Swiped Right On Buck

StaceyBlake

Summary: It's been over a year since Eddie has had sex. He is a bit desperate and downloads Tinder. When Buck's picture shows up on his screen and he swipes right, things take a sexy turn for these best friends.

AO3:https://archiveofourown.org/works/21818059

 Even The Bartender Knows

StaceyBlake

Summary: The Bartender at The Manhole gets a lot of guys coming into his bar who are questioning their sexuality. Helping them through it is kinda part of his job. But when a pretty Blond comes in and starts going on and on about how in love he is with his best friend, only for a man fitting said description of that best friend, walks in a few nights later going on and on about how in love he is with his best friend, well he's never seen that before.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21497890#main

 Feels Like Home

Mansikka

Summary: After a fire devastates Eddie's home, the logical thing for him and Christopher to do is stay with Buck. Though Buck's apartment isn't ideal; would it be such a crazy idea for the three of them to find a place to live in permanently together?

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24840859

 Friends To Make and Walls To Climb

By mansikka 

Summary: Eddie and Christopher just moved to Los Angeles, and they have lots of things to be happy about. Eddie loves his work on the 118, Christopher can get to know his mom again, and maybe Eddie and Shannon will relearn how to be friends. Christopher is also thriving in school, coming home every day with new tales about his new favorite teacher. Eddie needs to meet the incredible Mr. Buckley for himself, to see what all the fuss is about.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27957527

 Grand Guestures

By red_to_black

Summary: Buck didn't think too much of taking the Diaz boys out after a rough shift - until Hen and Chimney point out to him that he used to do the same with Abby. And really, if he was going to have a sexual crisis at the age of twenty seven, did it really have to be about Eddie?

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22208095

 Helping Hands

By Shaniamr

Summary: Everyone wants Buck to heal from the past year, and they think getting laid will help him. Buck doesn't want to revert back to Buck 1.0, but he also doesn't want his friends to worry about him. So Buck enlists the help of his best friend Eddie in fooling his friends. 

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22132669

 It Started With A Bang And A Hostage Situation

By JayJay_884 

Summary: Buck goes to the store one late night to buy food because of Maddie's pregnancy cravings. Whilst at the store, Buck accidentally gets caught in the middle of a robbery and gets knocked out. After waking up in the backroom, Buck finds himself as a hostage with a handsome and caring stranger.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30733649

 I Hit the Accelerator (But the Car was in Reverse) by exasiswings & letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

Summary:  When Buck is forced to confront the truth about his breakup with Abby, having casual sex with his hot new coworker seems like the best rebound idea. Unfortunately, that hot new coworker turns into his best friend. But best friends can keep having sex with each other, right? There's no way this could possibly go wrong.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21614971

 I Might Have To Tell You

By Ingu

Summary: Christopher gives Buck a list of how to cheer Eddie up while he's gone, and Buck accepts without reading the terms and conditions first.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24803128

 Is This How You Get A Cat?

By Whis

Summary: Buck didn't know he just needed to climb a tree, rescue the kitten, fall down, get a concussion and a huge nail through his hand to get a kitten, no that he was looking for one, although, if he had known Eddie was included in the package he would have done it earlier.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21614971

 Keep It On

By R_E_R6

Summary: When Eddie walks in on Buck, bent over in nothing but a hoodie, their plans for the night immediately change. Buck's outfit though? Well, Eddie requests that it stays the same...for reasons.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26679433

 Kissing Booth Fiasco

By Lilacsheen

Summary: Buck plans on tending a kissing booth on a Halloween bash... but the kicker? He's blindfolded the entire time.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26987998

 Kiss With A Fist 

By florenceandthemachine

Summary: A meet-cute au where Eddie takes Chris to the gym once a week and they box a little together before Eddie spars; usually Chris sits by the ring and reads but one day Eddie finds him laying on a bench, lifting an empty bar while this really cute blond guy spots him and gives him encouragement...

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25415776

 Lift Me Up

By CaptainSif

Summary: Buck gets stuck in his apartment building's broken elevator with his good-looking neighbor from the sixth floor.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28452156

 I, Hildy

By red_to_black 

Summary: The many ways in which Hildy interfered with Eddie and Buck's life, until they got the picture.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29511051

 Lightly Stabbed 

By  Every_Version_Of_Me

Summary: Buck gets stabbed and takes the time to call Eddie to tell him he can't make it to dinner.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21743812

 Love Language 

By red_to_black

Summary: Eddie's love language is acts of service, and Buck doesn't totally get it.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23403196?view_adult=true

[atlafan]

She Doesn’t Like Him

Hello! This is my entry for @majorharry‘s 20K fic celebration! This was such a fun idea, and I decided to use a few of the prompts to help move the story along. “I know you’re busy, but…can we talk?” “I’m pretty good at minding my own business. You should try it sometime.” “I—I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” “Cover up, please.” and “Well, maybe I don’t want to just be your friend.” I didn’t put any smut in this, for once in my life, I didn’t know who would end up reading this, so I wanted to keep it a little more tame than I usually do. Plus, who doesn’t love fluff, right? Hope you enjoy! This is an office worker!Harry AU. 

Warnings: angst and fluff

Words: 4.4K

Harry got along great with all of his coworkers, well, almost all of them. For some reason or another, he just couldn’t crack Y/N’s code. She was short with him, barely ever looked at him, and if she did, the eye contact was minimal. She’d look at his forehead or nose. He wasn’t sure if did something to piss her off, or what. No one else was bothered by him. Harry was one of those guys that could usually look on the Bright-side, find a silver lining, and everyone appreciated that about him. Once in a while if he said something optimistic in meeting, he would catch Y/N rolling her eyes or shaking her head.

The really interesting thing was that Y/N was nice to literally every single other person in the office. She was bubbly and personable. Harry just brought out this unpleasant side to her, and she hadn’t even noticed she was acting that way until he finally worked up the courage to bring it up. Harry didn’t want to work in a hostile environment, and he thought it was best to go straight to the source before talking with his supervisor about it. One afternoon he decides to knock on her door.

“Come in!” She says, not looking up from her computer.

“Hey.” He says as he slips inside. “I know you’re busy, but…can we talk?”  

She looks up from her computer with a scowl on her face. She sighs heavily and gestures for him to sit. He does so and looks at her, waiting for her undivided attention.

“Sorry, just let me get this email out.” She says as she types even faster than she was. Once she clicks send, she turns her body so she’s fully facing Harry. “What’s up?”

“I’m just going to be blunt…do you have a problem with me?”

“What? Of course not, why?”

“It’s just…I feel like every time I’m around, you flip a switch. It’s like you don’t like me or something…”

“Oh.” She blushes slightly out of embarrassment.

“In fact, I think this is the most you’ve ever even looked at me.” He frowns. “If I did something…I don’t know what it could have been…but would you tell me?”

“Harry, I’m so sorry…I think I’ve been a bit rude…subconsciously.” She bites her bottom lip and looks away. “I’ve been dealing with a lot lately, and I’ve been taking it out on you, which is wrong, and unprofessional.”

“To be fair, you’ve been like this with me since we’ve both been here. I don’t think you’ve ever even smiled at me.”

“Do I need to smile because I’m a woman, or are you someone that just needs the validation?” Harry’s mouth falls open. “I see you, Harry. You float through this halls, bounce from office to office, cracking jokes. It makes me wonder when you actually ever get any work done.” She leans forward and rests her chin on her palm.

“You’re not like this with everyone…just with me.”

“I apologize if I’ve been cold towards you, really I am. I’ll try not to be, okay?”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.” She graces him with a weak smile.

“I hope you don’t just think I’m a goof off, I really do work hard.”

“I’m sure in your own way you do.” She sighs and turns her attention back to her computer. “Are we done, I got about fifteen emails alone just from sitting here with you.”

“Um…yeah, we’re done…thanks for the chat.”

“Anytime.” She says without looking at him.

He leaves her office and closes the door behind him. What she said was starting to seep in. Did others see him as lazy or a clown? Harry worked really hard, so what if he would go chat with others when he needed a break? He also wondered what it was she was dealing with. He hoped she wasn’t alone with whatever it was. He was no stranger to therapy. Harry saw someone once a month or more if he needed it. Once he’s back in his own office he sits down and looks out the window. At least she said she would try to be nicer.

//

Y/N’s version of being nicer, was avoiding Harry at all costs, which he hated. He was a people person, and it killed him when people didn’t like him. He knew it was stupid to think that way, but that’s anxiety. He saw her in the break-room, grabbing her lunch out of the fridge. He decided to spark up a conversation. He thought maybe she would like him more if she got to know him better.

“Hi, Y/N.”

“Hello.” She says, putting her container into the microwave.

“How was your weekend?”

“Fine.” She wasn’t looking at him.

“That’s good.” He stands up and walks over to her. “I went to the movies with one of my best mates, haven’t seen him in a while. Have you seen any good movies lately? I like going when I can. Sometimes a few of us from here go, maybe you could-“

“You know something?” She looks at him now, just as her food is finishing. “I’m pretty good at minding my own business. You should try it sometime.” She snatches her food, and brushes by him as she walks out.

Harry sighs heavily and runs a hand through his hair as he watches her leave. A couple of other colleagues walk in to have their lunches.

“Harry! Haven’t seen you all day.” Lora pouts. “Come sit with us.”

“Think I just lost my appetite.” He frowns.

“What’s wrong?” Amy asks, as she sits down. Harry sits with her and Lora.

“It’s Y/N. She hates me.”

“Y/N?!” They say at the same time.

“Y/N doesn’t hate anyone.” Lora says. “She’s way too nice to hate anyone.”

“Well, apparently she’s nice to everyone but me.”

“Have you tried talking to her?” Amy asks.

“Yeah, we spoke Friday, and she said she’d try to be nicer to me, but…she just snapped at me out of nowhere.”

The women look at each other. They knew Y/N for a while now, they never really noticed her attitude towards Harry, but now that he was bringing it up, things were starting to click.

“Is it because I’m one of the few guys here?”

“No.” Lora squeezes Harry’s forearm. “She likes men plenty. I’m sure things will get better. She really is lovely.”

Harry felt better after speaking with the ladies at lunch. He usually enjoyed gossiping with them as it was, but it was nice to be able to vent a little. He was standing at his desk, rocking out to some music, working on some data when Y/N stormed into his office and slammed the door shut. It startles him, and he pauses his music immediately. She was fuming.

“Y/N, is everything-“

“Stop, just stop!” She charges towards him. “I told you to mind your own business, didn’t I?”

“Y, yeah you did…”

“So what do you do? You run off to Amy and Lora, your little mother hens to tell them I haven’t been all that nice to you. I stay away from you, I keep it professional, I do not to be your best friend.” She crosses her arms.

“I never said we needed to be best friends, I just wanna know why you’re literally nice to everyone here but me.”

“I’m getting divorced!”

“I—I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“Of course you didn’t! Because I didn’t want you or anyone else to know! But now, I just had to explain to them why I’ve been a little pissy towards you. You wanna get to know me, Harry?! Wanna know why we’re getting divorced?! My husband, whom I’ve known for ten years, my best friend in the entire world is gay. He’s just come to terms with his sexuality, and I have to be okay with it and support him! It’s not that I’m not, I’m very happy for him. He’s free and open to live his life as he wants to now, but now I’m left to pick up the pieces. I want to hate him, but I can’t!” Tears were welling up in his eyes. “I almost wish he had just cheated on me or something, but no, he’s gay. And you know what my family had to say about it? All they said was how stupid I was. How could I not have known? Obviously I didn’t know! If I did, I wouldn’t have married him after three years of dating! He feels terrible of course, but he’s been too busy going out and meeting men to notice or care that I’m crumbling from the inside. So you’ll have to excuse me that I’m not jumping at the chance to laugh at one of your stupid fucking jokes!”

Harry stood there stunned as she stood there catching her breath. It was clear she had been bottling all of this up. He felt terrible for her. There was a lot of turmoil going through her. He wanted ask what all of this had to do with him, but maybe he could get to the bottom of that later.

“Let’s get a drink after work.”

“What?! Are you crazy? What makes you think I would possibly want to go anywhere with you?”

“Y/N.” He sighs. “Swallow some pride and let me take you out for a drink after work. You seem like you need to let out some steam, and if I need to be the target, I’d like to have a shot in front of me.”

It was the most adult thing Y/N ever heard Harry say. He was actually being serious.

“Okay.”

After work the two decide to meet at a local pub. They sit down at the bar, and Harry orders two shots of Jameson. They clink their glasses and take the shots.

“You know, I actually think I needed this.” She smirks at the empty small glass, and Harry orders two more.

“So…no judgement or anything, but walk me through your marriage.”

“Well, we met when we were freshmen in college, and became fast friends. He was my best immediately. We were always together, and then one day he kissed me. I was actually dating someone else at the time, so he apologized and said it was because he was drunk.” She shrugs. “My boyfriend and I at the time ended up breaking, up and that was when he and I got together. We were together for a few years before we got married. We’ve only been married a year.” She sighs and takes her next shot. “Keep ‘em coming.” She tells the bartender.

“How did he tell you?”

“He made me this really nice dinner.” She smiles and then her eyes well up. “I thought he was going to tell me he was finally ready to start trying for kids, but…I was wrong. He told me that…I basically kept him alive, that I was the only person that could make him smile, but something was missing. He grew up in a really conservative home, and even when he went to college he still had so much repressed. He told me he wanted to be with men. He didn’t cheat on me or anything, he said he’d never hurt me like that, but he works with a few gay men, and he was talking to them more and more. Things sort of clicked for him one day. We just finalized the paperwork over the weekend, and on Friday I have to leave work early to go meet with our lawyers to finalize things.” Her voice cracks. “We have to sell our house, and I haven’t figured out where I’m gonna go yet. It all still doesn’t feel real.”

“I’m so sorry, that’s a really tough situation.”

“It’s been so weird, packing up all our memories. And I honestly couldn’t tell! Whenever we…well…you know…he was always very passionate.” She blushes and wipes a few tears away. “We have a glass of wine each night as we pack things up. Sometimes we laugh and other times it’s just silent. He feels terrible, and I’ve been trying not to make him feel more guilty.”

“Where’s he going?”

“He found some guys to move in with…in a different part of the city.” She sighs. “I suppose it’s better to not have brought a child into it.”

“Can I ask…why you’ve been taking things out on me?”

“You…you’re just like him.” She looks away. “Not physically, but you have the same exact sense of humor. I picked up on it early on, and maybe at first I liked it, but when things started to go wrong you just started to piss me off. That, and you’d always be so cheery. It was annoying…” She takes another shot and so does he. “I’m sorry, Harry. It was a stupid reason not to be nice to you and to be nice to everyone else.”

“You’re going through a lot, I understand.” He puts a hand on her shoulder. “I’m going to tell you something I’ve never told anyone else.” She looks at him. “I see a therapist once a month. I have my own issues. She’s amazing. I could give you her card, you need someone to talk all this through with.”

“I suppose you’re right.” She sighs. “Talking to you has made me feel a little better…guess talking with a stranger is good.”

“Hey, I’m not a total stranger. Despite your bad attitude we do work well together.” He grins.

“Don’t push it.” She smiles and shakes her head. “This was much needed. I didn’t know Jameson could go down so smoothly.” She was starting to slur her words.

“So, you said you weren’t sure where you were going to live?”

“I’ve been looking at some apartment, but I’m bummed. I’ve really liked living in a house. Maybe I could rent a detached condo or something.”

“This may sound a bit forward, but I actually rent a house. It’s a rent to own situation. It’s spacious, and I could honestly use a roommate.”

“Harry, you’re not seriously asking me to move in with you.”

“You’d have your own bathroom. We’d just be sharing the kitchen and laundry…and the living room, oh, and I guess the-“

“Why are you being so nice to me? I’ve been so awful, and-“

“Because I’m a firm believer in treating people with kindness. Plus, I wouldn’t mind my monthly payments going down. You’re used to living with a guy too, shouldn’t be too weird for you.”

“I haven’t agreed to anything yet.”

“Sure you have.” He smiles. “You’re sure as hell not going to move in with anyone else from work. And I can only guess your parents have offered, but that’s not an option for you is it.”

“Dear god.” She pinches the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger.

“Let me know when you can move, I’m more than happy to help.”

//

Y/N couldn’t believe that she was moving in with Harry, but she really had no other choice. She sure as shit wasn’t going to move in with her parents, and all of her close friends were married with kids. She couldn’t afford to live on her own, nor would she want to. Much like Harry, she was a people person. She’d go crazy if she lived alone.

Harry helped her move and everything. Got her things settled, explained how the washer and dryer worked, as if she didn’t already know, and he explained how he liked things organized in the fridge. She thought it was interesting how particular he was. She even started seeing the therapist he recommended, and she was doing better. She kept in touch with her ex-husband, but she told him they needed some time apart. She needed time to fall out of love with him.

Y/N and Harry were having a ball at work now, and it made him so happy. They had way more in common than she thought, and she loved getting to gossip with him after work in their now shared home. Things weren’t even awkward! She was grateful she had her own bathroom, and they both seemed to be on different laundry schedules. One night she was sitting in her room, watching some TV when she spilled some soda on her shirt.

“Oh, shit.” She groans. She peels the shirt off, and puts on a new one. She puts her robe on and heads down to the laundry room. She stops short when she sees Harry in there, only in a pair of boxers, tight boxers. “Cover up, please.” She says as she turns away.

“Y/N!” He practically shrieks. “I’m so sorry!” He snatches some sweatpants and a t-shirt and puts them on right away. “I’m decent.” She turns back around to look at him. “Sorry about that. You don’t usually do your laundry at this time.”

“I know, I, uh, spilled and, um…”

“Oh, let me take a look at that.” He takes the shirt from her. “I’ve got some stain fighter, I can throw this in with my next load if you want.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m already putting some stuff in, not a problem.”

“Thanks.”

He smiles at her and sprays some of the stain fighter on the spot before tossing it in with his things. He presses the button and sits up on top of the dryer, grabbing his book.

“Do you always just sit in here? It’s not like you’re in an apartment building.” She smirks.

“Old habit, I suppose. To be honest the sounds of the machines are sort of calming, and it gives me a chance to catch up on my reading.”

“Oh.” She nods.

“Does that need to be hung up or can it go in the dryer?”

“It can just go in the dryer, it’s a bed shirt.”

“You were getting ready for bed?”

“I was just hanging out, watching TV.”

“You should watch TV with me more. We eat dinner together.”

“Yeah, and then I like having time to wind down, just be with myself, you know?”

“Oh, right, yeah.”

“But I like knowing you’re in the house.”

He smiles at her and puts his glasses on, opening his book to where he had dog-eared it. She thanks him again for washing his shirt, and that was that. When she gets back up to her room she tries not to feel flustered when she thinks about the small glimpse she got of his body. He was littered with tattoos, and she had absolutely no idea. Sure, she had seen the ones on his arms, but on his torso? His thigh? Y/N always liked tattoos. She didn’t have any of her own, but she really liked them on men, for some reason.

The next morning, her shirt was folded on top of the dryer. She smiles and brings it up to her room to put away. Sometimes in the morning, Y/N could faintly hear Harry singing in his shower. He sang everything, nothing was off limits. Sometimes it was Gary Pucket and the Union Gap, and other times it was The Backstreet Boys. After living together for a few months, she noticed he would sing certain songs depending on his mood. Lately, they had all been love songs. She wondered if a new woman had come into his life. It made her happy to know Harry was happy.

She was making some scrambled eggs in the frypan when he comes downstairs. He was still humming whatever song he was singing before.

“Want some eggs?” She asks.

“That’d be great, thanks.” He smiles at her. “What’s your Saturday look like?”

“Just hanging out for a bit, and then…well…I don’t know. I’ve been invited to a party tonight, but I’m not sure if I want to go.”

“Why not?”

“It’s at Dave’s…”

“You’ve started speaking more?”

“We have.” She nods and scoops some eggs onto a plate for him. “I miss him, he was my best friend. Him and his roommates are having a big party, and he really wants me to come. I just don’t know if I could walk in there alone.”

“Hello!” He waves to her. “I love parties, I’ll go with you.” He sticks his fork into the eggs and takes a bite. “Delicious as always.”

“Thanks, and…you don’t already have plans?”

“Not really.” He shrugs. She doesn’t quite believe him.

“You really wanna go?”

“I do.” He smiles. “It’ll be fun.” He looks down at his chipped nails. “Should probably fix these up.”

Y/N giggles to herself as she watches Harry walk away. He could get frantic when he needed to go somewhere. She found his little quarks to be charming. Whatever woman was now in his life was a lucky lady.

//

“You look really nice by the way.” He says on the drive there. She was wearing a black dress, nothing special, she thought.

“Thanks.” Her leg was shaking. His large hand reaches for her knee.

“Are you nervous?”

“A little.”

“You can hold my hand the entire time if you want.”

“You’re the best, Harry, thank you.”

Once they get to Dave’s she takes a deep breath, and they go inside.

“Y/N!” He practically says in tears, kissing her on the cheek. “You look wonderful. I’m so glad you came.” He straightens up when he sees Harry. “And who is this?”

“I’m Harry.” He smiles and shakes Dave’s hand. “We live together.”

“Oh?” He smiles and Y/N and gives a wink.

“It’s not what you think.” She chuckles. “Come on.” She loops her arm through his. “I need some wine.”

Dave leads her into the house and introduces her to the new people in his life. After a couple of glasses of wine she felt perfectly fine. Her and Dave were laughing like old times. Harry was mingling with the other people. He would glance over at Y/N to make sure she was alright. The house was packed with people, and he sort of wanted to get her alone. He notices that she’s gone out on the balcony for some air, so he follows her.

“Hey, stranger.” He says to her.

“Sorry, I left you completely alone in there.”

“No problem, found plenty of people to talk to. Although, I have to admit, I really like talking to you.”

“I like talking to you too.” She smiles. “Now that I’ve had some liquid courage, I have to ask, who is it?”

“Who’s who?” He chuckles.

“The girl you’re madly in love with.”

“Wh…what are you talking about?”

“I hear you singing in the mornings, you’re repertoire has been nothing but love songs lately. So, who’s the lucky lady?”

“Oh, Y/N.” Harry shakes his head. “There’s no one new.” She looks at him confused.

“Then why all the love songs?”

“I’m definitely in love, you were right about that, but I haven’t met anyone.” He steps closer to her and takes one if her hands in his. Her heart nearly stopped.

“We’re friends.”

“Well, maybe I don’t want to just be your friend.”

“How…I mean…when did you start feeling this way?”

“A month ago.” He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “We were so in sync when you first moved in, it was great. Then one morning you made extra toast and bacon and eggs. You just…made me breakfast, out of nowhere. It was so nice. I was really happy that you had started being nicer to me, and then I just realized that you in general made me happy.” He uses his free hand, that wasn’t squeezing hers, to tuck some hair behind her ear. “You don’t have to feel the same way, maybe it’s just some silly crush, but I think you’re really special. You’ve been through a lot, and Dave’s really lucky to have your heart. I guess I’m just hoping you’re ready to give it to someone else.”

“Oh, Harry.”

She wraps her arms around him, and he does the same with her. They hold each other close for a little while.

“You have so much love in your own heart, and you really want to give it to me?” She asks.

“I do, if you’ll let me.”

“I think I could be open to it. I’ve been so happy living with you. To think I used to be so mean.” She pouts up at him , and he thinks it’s the cutest thing he’s ever seen. “Would you kiss me?”

“You want me to?”

“Yes.”

He smiles and leans down. His nose brushes against hers before their lips meet. She tasted like the wine she had been sipping on, and he didn’t mind one bit. Her hands tugged at his hips to pull him closer. His lips were soft, and she wanted more. He cups one of her cheeks to deepen the kiss. His tongue swipes along her bottom lip, and she opens up for him. At first maybe just to take a breath, but when he licks into her mouth, she’s not mad about it. Her tongue meets his, only for a moment, before she pulls away. She smiles up at him, and he’s beaming down at her.

“And to think I didn’t want to come tonight.” She laughs.

“We would have kissed eventually, I’m sure of it.” He grins and she swats a hand at his chest.

“Oh, shut up, and order our uber.”

“You wanna go so soon?”

“Hmm, stay here or go home and make out?” She holds up both of her hands as if she has weights in them. “Seems like the latter wins.”

Harry laughs and kisses her cheek. They both go back inside and say goodbye to everyone. They get into the uber and head home. Y/N felt really lucky. Over the last few months she’s been able to get to know Harry really well. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t like him. She had no idea he had these feelings for her, but she was delighted it was her he was singing about. Even though going through a divorce sucked, and she had to grieve over her long gone relationship with Dave, he was living his best life, and now, so was she. Y/N didn’t know what the future would hold with Harry, but she was starting to believe that everything happened for a reason. As he pulled her closer to his side and kissed the top of her head in the car, she knew that everything in her adult life was leading her to him.

[half-bakedboy]

Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz | Rated T | Chapters 1/11 | Posting Every Other Day 

When Maddie showed up at the one-eighteen covered in bruises and needing a place to stay, Buck didn't hesitate to let her into his home and the new life he had created in L.A. While he was happy to have his sister back, he was tired of insisting to her that he wasn't as lonely as she accused him of being. So when she assumes he's in some secret relationship with his coworker and best friend, Eddie, Buck decides it couldn't hurt to tell a little white lie, especially when it meant his sister could focus on something that wasn't her own past.

Now Buck is stuck trying to navigate through a ruse of his own creation while dealing with newfound feelings for his best friend that seemed to sneak up on him.

Oh, and did he mention the mysterious accelerant that kept finding itself in his path, putting everyone he loves in danger?

read chapter one on ao3

“I’m just worried about you, Evan,” Maddie sighed into the phone. Buck’s heart did that stupid little stutter directly correlated with disappointing his sister and he held the phone away from his face as if that would lessen the guilt he felt. 

“Mads, I’m—”

“You’re not fine.” 

Buck sighed. “I wasn’t going to say fine. I was going to say—” Buck thought for a second, but his sister was right—as she usually was—and who was he to argue with her? “Alright, I was going to say fine, but it’s because it’s true!” Buck urged, hoping that the more times he said it, the more likely she’d be to believe it. (Maybe he could convince himself of the fact along the way.)

“It’s been almost two months since Abby—”

“Really, big sis? You just gotta bring that up?” He complained, groaning more than audibly as he stared up at the firehouse ceiling. He had found in the last few weeks of overtime shifts that counting the tiles and slabs that made up the structure was a great way to pass the time. 

“Yes, little bro, I have to bring it up because I’m—”

“—Worried about you.” Buck finished the sentence with her and prepared for annoyance or, at the very least, another deep sigh, but instead, she stayed quiet as if giving him the chance to speak up. 

Another sigh resonated before Maddie said, “You’re all alone in this big city with no family. You have to understand my worry.” 

“I do, I really do, but I’m finally finding myself here. The 118 has really taken me in as their own; they’re friends who almost qualify as family at this point!” Buck argued, running a hand through his hair. Maddie couldn’t possibly understand what his fellow firefighters had meant to him. 

“Have you at least started dating yet?” Maddie asked. Buck resisted the urge to hang up on her and took a deep breath as he considered her question. He could tell the truth, which was that he hadn’t so much as touched a woman since Abby tore his heart out of his chest and stomped it into the ground. 

Or…

“I’m dabbling,” he decided to say instead. 

It wasn’t completely a lie. He had decided a few days ago with a lot of pressure from Hen and Karen that he needed to at least attempt to get back out there and downloaded one of the most popular dating apps he could find. He set up his profile—albeit very scarcely—and had been waiting for those likes to come in. What he wasn’t expecting was almost complete radio silence and for his ego to take a direct hit when Chim got a date within the first hour of downloading it. 

“Anyone I should know about?” For some reason, Buck wasn’t expecting the question. He thought that Maddie would shy away from asking or just be happy that Buck had divulged even just that little bit of information, but no. She just had to put her brother on the spot and have him panicking about what to say. 

“Soon?” He sputtered, immediately regretting his words the moment Maddie’s small squeal echoed through the speaker. 

“Evan Buckley, I knew you were keeping something from me the second you said you were fine! You knew that I wouldn’t just take that laying down, right? You must’ve!” The happiness in her voice broke Buck’s heart a little further and he couldn’t back down; not when her joy was so obvious in her rambling and the way she giggled into the phone. 

“I— It’s really new, Mads,” Buck muttered as he tilted his head to the side and let his phone rest against his cheek. 

“New is good and you deserve good, Buck,” Maddie said, the words like a gentle caress to his cheek that he would have leaned into if she was there. As if an idea had just occurred to her, Maddie gasped and said excitedly, “I’m gonna come visit. I’ve gotta meet this family of yours and you can’t avoid introducing me to whoever is making your life a little less lonely if I show up at your door.” Buck was annoyed that she had a point, but the prospect of having his sister around after a few years of space had his heart warming in his chest. 

“You’re welcome here any time, Mads. I’ve really missed—”

“I’ve gotta go,” Maddie said, her voice quieter and a bit more panicked than Buck would ever have wanted to hear. “Doug needs me to— Well, he just needs me. Will you please stop being such a stranger and let me in on your life from now on, little brother?” Buck rolled his eyes at the term of endearment but agreed easily anyway. 

“You know everything there is to know, sis.” 

He wished he could be surprised when he got the text a few hours later that a trip to L.A. just wasn’t in the cards for her.

----------------------------

The one-eighteen was quiet—though Buck wouldn’t dare say the word—for the majority of his shift a few days after his call with Maddie, which he was grateful for because Bobby was tabling his famous pasta bar as Buck skipped up the firehouse steps. The rest of the team was already seated in their usual spots and Buck took his next to the newest recruit, Eddie, elbowing his side as he leaned to scoop up the first piece of lasagna. 

“Ay, the rest of us eat first, unless you’re planning on serving me, Diaz,” Buck teased with an over-exaggerated wink.

“You know I just live to serve you, Buckley,” Eddie shot back easily and Buck couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up inside of him. It had been their thing since the new guy started. Buck would flirt with him until the rest of the team groaned or stopped it and apparently, Hen was at her wits end already if the piece of bread that slammed into Buck’s head was any indication. 

“ Jeez , Hen, we’re just having some fun,” Buck pouted, taking a large bite out of the piece of food that landed on his plate. 

“Do you always have to flirt with the newbie? It’s honestly sickening,” Hen complained with a roll of her eyes but Buck knew there was no heat in her words. He realized that look was all too similar to the one his sister would have given him. Buck laughed and tossed a grape tomato in her direction in retaliation. 

“There’s no stopping us now,” Buck assured her with a wink.  

And there really wasn’t. Buck and Eddie had been like that since the very beginning, and they only grew more comfortable and in sync in the few months they had spent working together. Eddie had joined the team as an openly gay single dad with no hesitation and Buck had respected that immediately. He was not one to hide his interest in any and all genders, but he wasn’t exactly waving a flag when he started at the one-eighteen. 

There was about a minute of silence when Eddie introduced himself before Buck decided that the best way to smooth him onto the team dynamic was to hit on him. Buck made a ridiculous come-on about a firehose that was brushed aside by the rest of the team, but Eddie laughed and gave it right back. The two had been fast friends ever since, much to the dismay of the rest of their team. 

“What’s everyone’s plans for the next three days off?” Buck asked as he stacked both his and Eddie’s plates full of food, tossing an untouched piece of bread behind his back that Eddie caught seamlessly just before it landed in his salad dressing. 

“Christopher and I have a Marvel marathon planned that I couldn’t even try to get out of,” Eddie offered, slurping up a spaghetti noodle as Buck sat back down. “Which reminds me that he wanted me to ask you if you could come?” Eddie asked, peering at Buck out of the corner of his eye. Buck wasn’t sure where the sudden shyness had come from, but before he could ask or answer, Bobby was chiming in. 

“May and Harry are with Michael so I will be finally showing Athena that my cooking skills are not just for show,” Bobby said with a large smile on his face. Buck liked seeing him like that, unapologetically happy for the new life he was starting. 

“I’m planning on sleeping until my alarm goes off in three days,” Chim laughed from where he leaned back in his chair. “What about you, Buckaroo?” 

“Well, I was going to try and find a date because my sister won’t stop bugging me about being single, but…” He trailed off, cupping Eddie’s shoulder tightly in his hand, “I just got an offer I’d be a fool to refuse.” 

Eddie smiled and shrugged off Buck’s touch with a fond roll of his eyes before they focused on his plate. Buck glanced around at his team with an uncontrollable smile on his face as they bantered and laughed and listened intently to whatever story Hen was telling about her son, Denny. He thought back to his conversation with Maddie and how worried she had sounded for him, as if he was alone without Abby. 

He wasn’t. His team—their laughter and camaraderie, their friendship and love, their shared stories and experience—was everything he needed.

----------------------------

Buck was stuck with the dishes once the table was cleared, but he didn’t mind. He liked to get lost in the mundane task of scrubbing and cleaning, the clanging of the dishes a friendly reminder that he had spent much-needed bonding time with his team. Plus, doing the dishes meant he got to decide where they would go out after their shift and he had the best places in mind. 

“Ma’am, are you okay?” Buck heard Chim’s voice softer than he expected from the second-floor terrace. 

“I’m— That’s just the question of the day, isn’t it?” Buck’s heart dropped as he recognized the all too familiar voice and before he could think twice, his legs were bringing him down the stairs in a sprint. “I’m looking for—”

“Maddie?” Buck asked. When she turned, he caught sight of the bruises littering her face and peaking out from underneath the collar of her shirt. The long sleeves did nothing to hide the darkness around her wrists and she didn’t even try to cover up the gashes on her cheek and lip.

“Hey, Evan,” she said weakly, a forced smile tugging at her lips. Buck had her in his arms before her legs could fully give out and he held her tightly to his chest, careful of the soreness he knew was probably hidden underneath her clothes. 

“Hey, hey, I got you. I got you, you’re okay,” Buck whispered into her hair as she sobbed, nails clawing at his back that probably would have hurt if he wasn’t so focused on providing his sister comfort. He caught Chim’s eyes over her shoulder, EMT bag in hand, and shook his head, searching the room for Hen. Chim seemed to understand exactly what he was doing and ran to the back where Buck was pretty sure Hen was resting. 

“I didn’t know where else to go,” Maddie choked out as she tried to pull away. Buck wouldn’t let her, though, as he threaded his fingers through her hair and kissed her temple softly. 

“Here is perfect, okay? Don’t worry about it,” Buck reassured. He wasn’t sure exactly what to say to her. He had known her relationship with Doug wasn’t the best and there was no doubt in his mind that that monster had hurt her. The way her body trembled and her voice shook had Buck feeling uneasy himself as he led her to one of the more comfortable couches in the station. 

“Hey, sweetie, I’m Hen. You’re Buck’s sister? Maddie?” Hen said as she approached, carefully as if walking up to an easily spooked animal. Buck appreciated it as much as it hurt him to see. 

“That’s me, the overbearing big sister,” Maddie attempted to joke, but it fell flat to everyone that had gathered around except for Buck. 

“I don’t think I ever used the word ‘overbearing’ specifically. Maybe persistent, annoying was probably dropped in there a time or two,” Buck teased. He was too grateful when Maddie’s hand came up to swat his shoulder to focus on the wince on her face at the movement. 

“She can’t be worse than you, Buckaroo,” Chim chimed in from where he stood a few feet away, flanked by Bobby and Eddie, who Buck noted was paying closer attention to where he kneeled beside his sister than he was at Maddie like everyone else. 

“I promise I’m not,” Maddie said weakly. Buck held onto her hand delicately as Hen settled beside her, the EMT bag on her lap. 

“Any family of Buck’s is family of ours,” Bobby stated, nodding at Hen as if giving her the okay to fully check up on her. 

“He’s told me a lot about you guys, his family away from family. I—” Maddie’s breath hitched as Hen pressed her thumbs over the bruises along her collarbones and she pressed her lips together to compose herself before she continued. “I’m sorry for barging in this way, looking like—”

“—Like a Buckley?” Eddie offered, easing the bit of tension of what wasn’t being said in the room. Buck sent him a thankful nod as he squeezed his sister’s hand. “We’ve heard y’all are prone to accidents. The number of times I’ve had to patch up this one on company time is too many and counting.” Buck laughed and tossed a friendly finger in Eddie’s direction, smiling when Maddie seemed to relax at the banter. 

“This one is always tossing himself into the fire quite literally, huh?” Maddie asked. Buck could tell she was relieved to have the conversation moved away from her and he didn’t mind being the target for her benefit. 

“I’ve only been here for a few months, but I’m pretty sure Buck would put anyone before himself.” Eddie’s voice was a lot closer than Buck had expected and he didn’t realize how much tension was building up inside of him until Eddie’s hand landed in between his shoulder blades. He glanced up to catch his friend’s eye, smiling softly at the steady and comforting press on his back. 

“Yeah, that’s exactly who he is,” Maddie muttered. When Buck glanced up at her, her eyes were narrowed and darted back and forth between him and Eddie accusatorily. That was not good . Buck cleared his throat.

“Can you guys give us a minute?” Buck asked.

Eddie ran his hand up to Buck’s shoulder, squeezing gently and Buck couldn’t resist reaching up to let his palm brush over the back of Eddie’s hand, letting him know how much the gesture was appreciated. Bobby and Chim hesitantly nodded in response before they all disappeared, leaving an even more tense Maddie and nerve-filled Buck alone with Hen who was treating the cut on Maddie’s cheek. 

As if scared for Buck to ask, Maddie offered, “It had been a few months, Buck. I thought— I really thought he had changed.” Buck sighed and rested his forehead on Maddie’s knee, relaxing only marginally when Maddie’s hand patted the back of his head. 

“What was it this time? Did you argue with him a little too hard? Maybe you didn’t reach the level of perfection he always required of you?” 

“Buck—” Hen warned, shooting a look that could kill in Buck’s direction. 

“No, it’s— It’s okay. He’s right either way,” Maddie relented with a deep sigh. “It had been building since I said I wanted to visit you in L.A. I told him that you had alluded to seeing someone and that I wanted to see if it was true. He said I couldn’t go, that he was the only family I needed, and when I argued against that…” Maddie trailed off, gesturing to her face and that was enough for Buck to put together what happened next. 

“He did this because of me?” Buck’s voice shook as he glanced back at his sister, reaching a hand up to stroke a finger over the dark bruise on her jaw. Maddie grabbed it and turned toward her brother, leveling their eyes together with a protectiveness in them that provided him the calm he needed. 

“This was not your fault, Evan,” Maddie said sternly. 

“It’s neither of your faults,” Hen added, resting her palm on Maddie’s arm softly. Maddie nodded and smiled at Hen as brightly as she could given the circumstances. 

“She’s right and I came here because I can’t have this happen anymore,” Maddie stated, holding onto Buck’s hand a little tighter. “You mentioned your captain’s girlfriend was a cop?” 

Buck nodded and wrapped his arms around his sister, wishing he had never let go in the first place.

----------------------------

Athena had arrived at the station quicker than Buck had expected her to. Upon seeing him, she pulled him into a tight hug that he didn’t realize he had needed so much before disappearing into Bobby’s empty office with Maddie. He didn’t trust just anyone with his sister, but the second the door shut, he felt like he could finally take a breath. 

He was flanked by both Hen and Eddie in a flash while Chim paced in front of them, chewing on a piece of beef jerky to stay occupied. Bobby watched from above, silently observing his team, and looking ready to step in if Buck needed it. They were all there for him and when the door finally opened after what felt like hours later, the smile that tugged at the corner of Maddie’s lips told Buck she had seen just that. 

“Again, I’m really sorry for—” Athena shook her head and pointed a finger at Maddie, effectively stopping her unneeded apology. 

“You’ll only have to be sorry if you don’t let this one take care of you the way you deserve,” she said, raising her eyebrows like a challenge. Maddie pressed her lips together and nodded bashfully as she leaned into the arm Buck had thrown around her neck. 

“Buck, shift’s just about over. Why don’t you show your sister where she’ll be staying?” Bobby said. It was an order as much as a suggestion but Buck was going to take him up on it either way. 

“Yeah, that sounds great. Let me know if you need me to come back in.” Bobby silenced him with one look.

“We can survive the next hour without you, man,” Eddie chimed in. He walked over and pulled Buck into a one-armed hug as if he knew nothing could pry him away from his sister. Buck was grateful for the extra warmth Eddie provided him, either way.

“If you guys need anything, you know where we’ll be,” Hen assured, rubbing a gentle palm down Maddie’s arm until their hands were connected. Maddie squeezed it tightly and mouthed her thanks at Hen who brushed it off with a wave of her hand. 

“I can’t thank you guys enough,” Buck began, but he stopped himself from saying any more before any of his team could argue. “I’ll see you in a few days?” He asked, directing his attention to Bobby so he could let his captain know that his sister arriving wouldn’t impact his work. As if he already knew, Bobby nodded and wrapped an arm around Athena’s waist. 

“We’ll probably see you before then,” Bobby offered with a slight wink and Buck laughed. 

“You guys sure I can steal my little brother away early?” Maddie asked nervously. 

“Now that you’ve teased us with him leaving, you can’t take it back,” Eddie said from beside Buck. They both had to laugh and Buck punched Eddie’s arm in retaliation only for Eddie to grab onto his hand tightly, not letting him pull away yet. His voice was low as he muttered, “You’ll let me know if you need anything?” 

It was meant to be a question, but Buck knew it wasn’t. Everyone around them was so focused on Maddie and her injuries—which Buck couldn’t blame them for—that none of them really stopped to think how tough the next few days may be for the Buckley’s as a whole. But not Eddie. Just one glance from his friend told Buck that Eddie was well aware of the toll this might take on Buck’s good-natured mind and that Eddie was going to be there through it all. 

“Yeah,” Buck confirmed, resting a hand on Eddie’s neck in a friendly gesture of comfort, “I’ll call you.”

----------------------------

“I’m not going back there,” Maddie said the minute the door to Buck’s apartment shut. 

“I know you’re not,” Buck agreed because even if she hadn’t made the choice herself, he wasn’t going to see his big sister hurt like that again. 

“I grabbed what I could before I left and it’s going to take me a little while to get back on my feet, but—”

“Hey,” Buck said gently, wrapping his arms around his sister once more, “we’re gonna figure this out. It’s always been just the two of us, right? Sure, a few years have gone by, but you’re still the most important person in the world to me and we’re going to figure this out.” He repeated, believing the words so fully that Maddie must have, too. Her shoulders slumped in either relaxation or defeat, Buck couldn’t be sure which, and she pulled away enough for Buck to press a soft kiss to her forehead. 

“Can I stay here for a little? Just until—”

“Maddie, stop. You’re staying here whether you like it or not,” Buck said with a laugh, ruffling her hair in his hand before she could swat him away. 

“I just don’t want to impose on any guests you might have around,” Maddie said, crossing her arms over her chest and glancing around his apartment as if looking for signs of additional life. 

Buck sighed, “Go take a shower while I make up some dinner.” Maddie’s laugh was so refreshing, the tension of the last few hours seemed to fall right off of his shoulders. 

When he heard the water turn on, he busied himself with finding dinner even though he was still full from the large lunch at the station. He wasn’t sure when the last time Maddie had eaten was but her skin was too pale even through the bruises for him not to offer her something good. He rummaged through his cabinets for way too long, losing track of time as he listened to Maddie’s voice stop and start in the shower. 

He used to love listening to her sing. She had always been carefree and beautiful and that was always something he admired. He could hear the hesitance in her voice as she weakly sang through the chorus of one of her favorite country songs and wished he could heal whatever it was inside that had her balking. Buck loved her more than anything in the world.

With a deep breath, he reminded himself that she had made that first step, the one he had wanted her to so many years before. He smiled to himself, grateful that she made it back to him mostly in one piece. Even though she didn’t have that fire in her eyes that he remembered, he knew that her deciding to come home to him was the spark she needed to light it back up. 

A knock at the door had him cursing because the water had shut off and he still didn’t have dinner on the table. When he opened the door and saw Eddie, two pizza boxes in hand, he thought he might cry. 

“I figured you usually go grocery shopping with Chris and I and we’re running low on food for two so—” Buck interrupted him by wrapping him another suffocatingly tight hug. 

“Man, you could not have arrived at a better fucking time,” Buck sighed with relief. “I can’t believe you did this for her,” he muttered mostly to himself. Eddie opened his mouth, but before he could respond, Maddie trotted down the stairs, patting her hair down with a towel. 

“Eddie, right?” She asked, a twinkle in her eye that Buck wasn’t too fond of given the situation. “Did you bring us dinner?” 

Eddie nodded and mumbled, “Yeah, for, uh, you actually.” Buck took the pizza boxes from his hands and Eddie immediately ran his fingers through the hair on the back of his neck as if suddenly bashful. Buck thought he looked more adorable than usual but brushed it aside. 

“That is so sweet of you,” Maddie said, knocking her hip against Buck’s. “Isn’t that so sweet of him, Evan?” Eddie snickered and Buck knew it was because of the use of his first name. He shot an unimpressed glance at Eddie who pressed his lips together in return as if holding back more laughter. 

“Eddie’s just a regular old saint if you ask anyone,” Buck explained with much more sarcasm in his voice than he really intended. Maddie didn’t seem to notice as she smiled up at Eddie. 

“Are you staying for dinner? I’m sure Buck would appreciate the company,” Maddie said happily, side-eyeing Buck as if he’d even thought to go against her words. 

“Oh, no, I gotta get back to my kid,” Eddie said, gesturing with his thumb over his shoulder. Buck knew Christopher wasn’t with him or else he would have asked them both to come inside. 

“You have a kid?” Maddie asked, mouth agape for reasons Buck didn’t know but would definitely ask her about later. 

“Yeah, Christopher. He’s—”

“—The best kid in the entire world,” Buck interrupted, turning to his sister. “Maddie, this kid is a spitfire and he’s got jokes and comebacks for everything, I swear! And he’s like the smartest 8-year-old I’ve ever met, not that I’ve hung out with many 8-year-olds, but still. You’re gonna love him!” Buck decided. He must have been rambling as both his sister and Eddie were staring over at him with amused looks on their faces. “…What?” 

“I mean, I was just gonna tell her his age, but I guess all that stuff is true, too,” Eddie teased. He flinched when Buck swatted at him with the hand that wasn’t holding the pizza. 

“He sounds incredible. I hope I get to meet him?” Maddie asked. Buck nodded quickly and a smile Buck wasn’t sure he had ever seen before tugged at the corner of Eddie’s lips. Buck was just about to offer for them to come over the following night when he remembered what he had already agreed to. 

“Oh, crap. The Marvel movie night!” Buck exclaimed as he finally set the pizzas down on the side table. “Did you already tell Chris I was gonna join?” 

“Yeah, but it’s totally fine. I’m sure he’ll understand that your sister is here and—”

“Nonsense! You promised that kid a movie night, he’s gonna get a movie night!” Maddie shouted as she opened up the pizza box and helped herself to a slice. Buck was glad she seemed to still have the appetite he remembered. “I don’t mind having a night to myself. It’s been too long since I’ve been able to just cry over a sad Hallmark movie with a glass of wine, you know?” Buck didn’t, but he also really wanted to hang out with the Diazes. 

“We can always reschedule. Marvel isn’t going anywhere,” Eddie offered, but Maddie just shook her head and slapped Buck’s arm like it was his job to convince Eddie he would be a fool to do that. 

“I’ll be over tomorrow at five with sandwiches to pay you back for tonight, okay?” Buck said softly, holding Eddie’s bicep in his palm. A blush covered his face and Buck wasn’t sure why he was being so nervous all of a sudden; they bantered and touched like that all the time. 

“Yeah, okay. Maddie, thank you for letting me steal him and enjoy the pizza. Buck, I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow.” He waved as he backed away and Buck watched as he jumped into his car and drove off. 

Once the door was shut, Maddie smacked him on the arm and Buck recoiled, sending a confused glance at his sister. 

“What the hell was that for?” Buck asked, rubbing his skin even though it really didn’t hurt that bad. 

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were dating a coworker !” Maddie shouted, gaping at Buck with joy in her eyes that he had missed more than he realized. He was so focused on her happiness, it took him more than a few reasonable moments to realize what she had said. 

“I’m— Wait, what?” Buck asked, pausing mid-bite on the piece of the pepper and sausage pizza he made a mental reminder to thank Eddie for tomorrow. 

“Eddie?!” Maddie repeated in a squeal. “I knew after our conversation that whoever you were dating wasn’t just any old person, but another firefighter? A male firefighter at that? No wonder you didn’t want to tell me yet!” Buck blanched and finished chewing his pizza carefully so as to not choke. 

“Maddie, I mean this with no malice and all confusion; what the absolute fuck are you talking about?” Maddie scoffed and grabbed the pizza boxes, wandering to the living room and placing them on the coffee table. She made her way into the kitchen to grab two beers from the fridge before settling down next to Buck who had to sit on the couch and think before he fell over. 

“Oh, you cannot even pretend that you guys aren’t head over heels for each other. The hand on your back at the station? The side hug? Bringing you pizza after a rough day? The blushing?!” Maddie raised her eyebrows at Buck and he honestly didn’t know how to respond. 

He should have said it was nothing. He should have said they were the only two openly not-straight men that he knew of who worked at the LAFD and were closer because of that. He should have said that they were just friends who put their lives at risk for each other every day so their relationship was bound to be special. He should have said all of that. 

But Maddie looked so happy and carefree so instead, he lied. 

“It’s… really new,” he said, echoing the words he had told her before she came to L.A. Her squeal of delight was enough for any regret he might have had to wash away and for his heart to soar that he could put that bright smile back on his sister’s face. 

“Evan Buckley, you have to tell me everything !”  Maddie crossed her legs on the couch and settled back against the cushions, making herself comfortable in the place Buck had started to call home. Even with the bruises and cuts littering her face, she looked at ease, and Buck smiled over at her widely. 

“There’s nothing to tell, Mads. He started at the station a few months ago and we just… hit it off. Like I said, it’s new and he’s… good.” He wasn’t sure why he had hesitated but he hoped she didn’t read too much into it. When she rested a gentle hand on his bicep and squeezed, he knew she had believed every word of what he had said. The fact it wasn’t a total lie was the only reason he didn’t let his guilt build up too much just yet. 

“I’m really proud of you, you know?” Maddie said softly, moving her hand up to cup the side of his face and brush her thumb along his cheekbone. He melted into the touch and closed his eyes, the words resonating through him as the ones he always longed to hear. 

“What for?” Buck asked. 

Maddie sighed and said, “For being you.” She tapped his nose with the tip of her finger before she added, “Now tell me all about him!”

[softtransbf]

Mister Nice Guy, part 1

Summary: You’re new to the BAU and get along well with everyone, almost. You can’t figure out why the infuriatingly handsome Dr. Spencer Reid seems to hate you so much.

Word Count: 2222

Reader: Trans man, he/him pronouns, no physical description.

Warnings: Alcohol, brief description of a case and therefore murder. Nothing graphic.

(Part two)

~~~~~~~~~~

It was your first day at the BAU, and you were so excited. It took all of your willpower not to skip from the elevator to your new boss' office. You definitely caught a sideways glance from an incredibly handsome man with very expressive eyebrows, but you didn't let it concern you; you'd worked too damn hard for too damn long to let anyone bring you down today. You got to the door and knocked sharply. 

"Agent L/N, please, come in," came a voice from inside the room. You took a deep breath and walked through the door.

You'd heard stories about Aaron Hotchner and the BAU- everyone had. Most people only heard the good parts- the heroic tales, the happy endings. But you liked to be prepared, to know the truth of what you were going after, so you'd also paid attention to the quieter whispers. The imposing boss who never smiles, the weird and maybe-pseudo-sexual relationship between the exuberant tech analyst and one of the profilers, the betting pool on whether or not the two female profilers were secretly gay for each other, true crime writer extraordinaire and profiling legend David Rossi leaving retirement to mostly be snarky, and the young agent with multiple doctorates who is smarter than seems humanly possible. You would never admit it, but you were particularly eager to meet the genius. He guest lectured once in your friend's linguistics class your last semester before graduating, and xe wouldn't shut up about him for an entire week. When you told xem that your transfer was approved, xe begged for "a full rundown on what he's like up close and personal" after your first case. But first, you needed to meet with SSA Hotchner.

"Please, take a seat." He gestured to the chairs in front of his desk. 

"Thank you. It's a pleasure to meet you, sir." You thanked your lucky star that your voice didn't shake.

"It's a pleasure to have you. I heard nothing but the best about you from your previous supervisor. Officially, all the paperwork has gone through for your transfer, but I would like to ask a couple of questions before we get started." 

"Of course, sir. What would you like to know?" One corner of his mouth ticked up slightly for a fraction of a second, and you counted that as a major victory.

"First and foremost, why are you interested in the BAU?" You relaxed slightly; you'd prepared for this question.

"Human behavior is nothing short of fascinating. Everyone is shaped by a unique set of experiences, but at the end of the day, we all behave in documented patterns. Everything matters, because it shapes who we are, but also nothing does, because we all end up in one of a finite number of 'shapes', so to speak. No one is the same, but we all exhibit set behavioral patterns. No matter what someone's gone through, at the end of the day, they are still understandable and predictable. I find that absolutely fascinating, and the work that the BAU does with that is incredible. I want to be a part of it, and I have the skill and drive to do so. After all, the BAU essentially wrote the handbook for Crisis Negotiation."

"That is a very interesting perspective, agent." His face was neutral, but you detected approval in his tone. "I only had one other matter to bring up- I see two different first names in your paperwork, and two of your references refer to you with different pronouns. Which name do you prefer, and what are your pronouns?"

You were floored; you'd never had a supervisor so casually look past paperwork outing you. "Y/N, sir, and he/him/his."

"Wonderful. Well, Y/N, welcome to the BAU. Let's go meet the team, shall we?" You nodded and followed him out his door into the meeting room, where the rest of the team was assembled.

"Everyone, this is Special Agent Y/N L/N. He has just transferred from Crisis Negotiation."

"Oh! New guy! Hi hi hi! I'm Penelope Garcia, just call me Penelope, and I do all the tech-y, research-y stuff." She made her way across the room to you as she spoke, talking with her hands.

"Pleasure to meet you, Penelope! I love the look you're rocking, by the way. Those shoes in particular are magnificent." You knew you were being the gay sterotype that you'd spent your career trying to avoid, but shoes that good could not go uncomplimented.

"Oh my goodness, thank you!" she said to you before stage-whispering to the rest of the team, "I like him! Let's keep him." The team laughed, and you blushed. It seemed that Hotchner had wordlessly passed on the duties of making the introductions to her, because she pointed to the agent closest to her, handsome-guy-with-the-eyebrows from earlier, and continued on. 

"Okay, so, this is Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss, Jenifer Jareau, but we all call her JJ, David Rossi, and Dr Spencer Reid." They all nodded, smiled, and/or waved slightly when they were introduced, with the exception of Dr Reid, who looked almost like he was looking at a puzzle. You chalked the feeling in your gut it gave you to first-day nerves.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all, and I look forward to getting to know you all better as time goes on." You were addressing everyone, but something about the way Dr. Reid was staring at you made it difficult to look away from him for too long.

"Wonderful! Now, as much as I wish we could all chit-chat and get to know Y/N better, we do have a case. Last night, a body was found in San Francisco's Golden Gate Park."

The case was interesting, twin injustice collectors, one more mission oriented, the other interested almost entirely on experimenting with different forms of torture on the victims. The former, over the weeks between kills, had started dating one of the local detectives, neither of them knowing of the other's involvement in the case. You were there when that information came to light at the killer's arrest, and you were able to diffuse the situation, ensuring that no one was harmed.

On the flight back, Prentiss insisted on the whole team going out for drinks to welcome you to the team. Hotchner declined, because he needed to get back to Jack, and Rossi said he had "plans with Tony Bennett", but everyone else agreed, mostly enthusiastically. It took significant persuasion from JJ to get Reid to agree to go out with you all. For the whole case, he was abrupt and distant with you, despite your best efforts. You knew it was silly, but you really wanted your coworkers to like you, so you decided you were going to do your absolute best to get him to like you by the end of the night.

-

"Hey, doc, first round's on me. What'll it be?" You'd noticed during the case that he shrugged off all of your attempts to start a conversation, but you figured that even he wouldn't ignore you under these circumstances.

"Uh, white wine would be great, thanks."

"White wine? At a dive bar? Does this bar even have white wine?" You'd intended to be charming, but, seriously, white wine? Who was this guy?

He opened his mouth, clearly indignant, but he was interrupted by Morgan chuckling from behind you both.

"That's why we go to this dump, newbie. It's the only bar in the area that serves white wine, which is all Pretty Boy here drinks." He winked at you and playfully elbowed Reid in the ribs.

You threw your hands up in mock surrender and chuckled. "Okay, okay, white wine for the good doctor it is. What's your poison? I'm sure word's gotten around that the first round is on me."

"You know, I might have heard something about that, and I most definitely wouldn't say no to a dirty martini." He winked at you, and your chuckle turned into full-on laughter.

You got the bartender's attention and ordered their drinks and a Jack and Coke for yourself. "It's a damn shame you're straight, Derek. Truly a crime against queer men everywhere, although I'm not so proud I can't admit that I'm a bit glad you're not competition."

"Wait wait wait, how do you know I don't like a little meat on the side?"

"So, sidestepping the fact that not all men have penises and some women do, you are so hetero that it's almost painful. Look around; men of all shapes and sizes outnumber women 2 to 1 at least. But you've spent the whole night making eyes at those women over there." You pointed to a table on the other side of the room. "Plus, I may or may not have received a very detailed string of texts from Penelope that essentially amounted to a crash course on all of y'all. I get a feeling that she might like me a little bit."

"My bad on the meat comment- I'll definitely fix that. And speaking of Penelope being a font of information, she's been uncharacteristically tight-lipped about you. What's your big secret, new guy?"

You raised an eyebrow and sipped your drink. "All you need to know is that Hotch, who strikes me as even more protective of this team than he lets on, which is really saying something, knows, and he cares less than any brass I've ever met. And I know for a fact that if Penelope thought it was concerning, she'd have at least voiced some suspicions about me, if not told you outright. I'm not ashamed of it, it's just none of y'alls business. Anyway, the blonde from the table you were eyeing earlier is coming over to see if we've been flirting this whole time so she knows whether to flirt with you or gush about how she's always wanted a Gay Best Friend oh my god. If I'm still here, it'll be both, and I'm allergic to that particular brand of cishet nonsense. Have fun, good-lookin'." You chuckled and patted him on the shoulder as you left, and out of the corner of your eye, you saw Reid roll his eyes, down his drink, and walk in the other direction. What is his deal? Whatever. I'm not about to let him wet blanket all over tonight. You took out your phone and sent out a couple of quick texts.

[To: Penelope]: Thank you for not outing me. It means the world to me. Let's get brunch sometime?

[To: Nerd <3]: you sure Reid seemed pleasant when he lectured? that has Not been my experience with him so far. you were right about him being Cute cute, though, damn. a Gay could get lost in those big brown eyes, and in different circumstances I'd climb him like a tree. shame he's Like That lmao

Looking up from your phone, you saw Emily and JJ nearby, so you went over to join them. 

"Oh em gee Y/N you're gay? I had, like, no idea! We should, like, totally get brunch and then go shopping! This is gonna be so much fun; I've always wanted a gay best friend!" You rolled your eyes and laughed at Emily's terrible Valley Girl accent. "Unfortunately, I did not spend my time in the closet learning anything about clothes. I only dress halfway decently for work because my friend dragged me to the mall and updated my wardrobe when I applied for this position. It's all xir doing."

"Well, xe has excellent taste." You mentally filed away JJ's effortless use of neopronouns.

"I'll be sure to let xem know! I'm so down for brunch, though." You checked your phone. "Looks like Garcia is too!"

"Damn, you work fast. You'll fit right in here," Emily laughed.

"Honestly, I'm a little bit blown away by how awesome and welcoming you all are. Well, mostly. Is Spencer like this with every new person, or did I somehow do something to offend him?" Emily and JJ shared a look you couldn't quite read before JJ answered.

"Spencer…" she hesitated, "He's going through something right now. I'm sure he'll figure it out soon, and things will smooth out." 

So you waited. Weeks passed, and you fit in well with the team. You ended up getting close to Derek and Penelope in particular, and you kept trying to make nice with Spencer. Weeks of cold shoulder and as few words as possible to you while being his normal, verbose self with everyone else. So, three weeks into your new job, on a night out with Derek and Penelope you made a decision.

"Look. It's been weeks, and the guy still won't say more than 5 words to me. I'm done trying to… I don't know what I was even trying to do," you slurred, you’d probably had one drink too many. "Make a friend, maybe? I don't even know. But I'm done. He wants to give taciturn bordering on rude? Then that's what he'll receive. Let's see how Pretty Boy likes a taste of his own medicine. No more Mister Nice Guy." You wouldn't remember the look they shared until much later.

And so, your silent war with Spencer truly began.

[hayjeon]

You Set My Heart on Fire 01 [M] ft. Namjoon

→ fireman!namjoon and paramedic!y/n au (warning: drunken sex, oral, etc.)  → 10k words, part 1 | part 2 | fin. → As a surgeon forced to volunteer as a paramedic in the Seoul Fire Department during an unfortunate probation incident, your one and only goal was to get to work, do your thing, and get the hell home and back to your original high-salary job. But when the SFD’s Chief is the incredibly attractive, cocky, and persistent Kim Namjoon, things start to get heated.  

Hi! this is a reupload, and i figured i’d vamp up the title and the header in the meantime! Thank you to the user who managed to save this just in time, after I accidentally deleted it T___T I am forever indebted to you, and I lost your username, so if you see this pls dm me i’d love to write something for as a token of my appreciation!

You roll your eyes, crossing your arms and leaning back in your chair as the lawyer continues to lay out the demands.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” you huff, glaring at the idiot gangster who’s at the other side of the room. He cringes a bit at your glare, nursing an ice pack against his bruised cheek.

“I swear, he slapped my ass! I was just retaliating!” You cry, frustrated. Your surgery chief huffs angrily at your behavior and you settle back, clenching your fists on top of the table.

The lawyer snarks back, “You also managed to cause damage to the victim’s body in the process. He’s demanding full reparations. Let’s see,” she muses, flipping through the documents spread out on the table between the both of you. “A broken nose, bruised cheekbone, fractured wrist from when he fell, and muscle strains on his lower back, and psychological damage from framing him for sexual harassment and from the physical assault. In total, it would amount the hospital to about $50,000 to cover the hospital costs and the time he would need to talk off from his job, and the continued physical and mental therapy sessions to follow for around 6 months.” She closes the file with a grin. “So, Dr. Y/N, what’s it gonna be?”

“Chief, I can’t believe we’re just losing to him!” You cry, following after Dr. Kim, who’s seething as he storms down the hall outside of the conference room.

He screeches to a halt, turning around with a glare. “Well, what do you wanna do?!” He throws his hands up in defeat, “You want to cause a whole legal issue? You know that there’s really nothing else we can do in this situation! It’s your word against his, and the video cameras only show proof of him passing by you, and then you throwing a big ass punch in his fucking face!” He cries, taking off his glasses and rubbing his temples.

“Look, Dr. Y/N, you did the right thing. The fucker deserved the punch, and you threw a good one. But,” he continues, placing his glasses back on his nose and patting your shoulder, “giving him the money is the best thing we could do for both the hospital and for you. So, just, take this next month off, get the community service done and then come right back. Alright? I’ll even let you head all the interesting cases that come into the operating room.”

He sighs, and walks off, leaving you behind. You roll your eyes and run a hand through your hair, fist clenching on the brochure of community service options for doctors.

The fucker had brought his girlfriend in during your shift at the emergency room, and while she was getting stitches for a cut that she got from a building collapse, in the craze of the emergency room, he was going around touching asses. You’d heard the nurses complaining about it, about how it was just a swipe of the hand that seemed like an accident, but multiple had the same experience from the same seedy-looking jerk.

When it was your turn to go up to the patient and explain that her stitches were done and she was alright to go home, he’d come up next to you and his knuckles grazed the skin of your ass. Sick of everything, you’d pushed him back and socked him straight in the face.

Later, from the cameras though, there was no visible evidence of him touching anyone, and it was your word against the clear security camera shot of you socking him right in his big ass nose. So you open the brochure and plop down at your desk to see what options there were. There were the general ones, where you could serve and clean up at a park or volunteer at a soup kitchen, and then there was a separate page for doctors who probably just wanted to maintain their skills in the field they volunteered in. You pick up the phone.

“What?” Yugyeom asks, “Chief seriously ended up giving you a probation period for community service?” He sighs over the phone, and you roll your eyes too.

“Yeah,” you huff, “which one should I do? I should sign up today, since it might take a bit to get approved and might as well start early so I can go back to work as soon as I get all my hours finished.”

He muses, probably scanning the picture you sent him. “Hm...well look, you can go travel to Africa or Cambodia or something. It’ll be like that one drama with Song Joong Ki in it. Maybe you’ll meet a hot military general. What do you think?”

“Too far,” you complain, taking a red pen and drawing a line through it. “Also, they don’t cover air fare or housing. Maybe something more local.”

“Okay, well then what about teaching kids in elementary and high school about general first aid and health? You can maybe meet a single teacher who’s good with kids. That’s kind of hot.”

“I fucking hate kids, Yug, you know that,” you sneer, rolling your eyes and crossing out that option. “Also, why are you trying to get me laid, you should be worried about your own empty gay love life.”

He huffs, “Well, bitch, if you’re gonna be so picky why’d you call. Just take the second to last one, the medic for the fire department! It’ll be fun, I know a friend who works in the one that’s close by to the hospital, so you can just commute from there and if you guys ever end up coming to the emergency room, you’ll see all of us there too.”

You hum, scanning through the brief description: Medic for the Seoul Fire Department. In-department housing and meals provided during both on-call and working hours. Needs basic EMT and paramedic skills. Must be able to handle emergency situations calmly and communicate with safety officers.

You purse your lips, scoffing a little bit at the emergency part. “Well, if there’s something I can handle, it’s emergency.”

He laughs, “What a downgrade...from a cardio surgeon to a paramedic. Jeez, you better get out of this one quick. Just make sure not to punch anyone during duty, and you’ll be fine.”

“Shut up bitch. Let’s go clubbing tonight. I need to let some of this stress out before I get trapped in there.”

The night was lively and the drinks kept flowing. Jennie and Jackson from Health and Nutrition, Sana from pediatrics, Yugyeom and Seulgi from Cardio, and even the oh-so-popular Jaebom and Jinyoung from general surgery came out.

You were dressed in the hottest dress you could find in Seulgi’s closet, and according to Yugyeom’s apparently “gay and therefore superior opinion,” your outfit and hair and makeup were basically a “straight guy’s ticket to bonertown.”

“Legit, how could you be so gay but also talk like such a frat boy at the same time?” You sneer, taking another shot of vodka.

He sucks on his lemon, and then flashes a smile. “It’s the best combination. I pull.”

He cocks his chin to a direction behind you. “Also seems like I was right, because you’ve been pulling too. That guys been staring ever since we got to the bar.”

You turn, blurry vision settling on a handsome, leather jacket clad guy that’s sitting with two other guys at the table. He’s looking now, eyebrow cocked and lip between his teeth. He’s not usually your type, but you feel it. This, was the guy you were gonna fuck tonight.

You get up, patting Yugyeom on the arm. “Thanks, I’ll take myself home tonight.” He whistles behind you as you try your best to make your way to the guy, but suddenly your drunk ass hobbles on your Forever 21 heels, and you topple to the side. All of a sudden, there’s a strong hand gripping your upper arm and pulling you up, and an arm wrapping around your waist to offer support.

“Oh shit, miss, you alright?” A low voice sounds right next to your ear. You look up, expecting to see the leather jacket guy, but this...this was much better. This guy was dressed in only a black t-shirt tucked into blue jeans. But his simple ensemble didn’t matter. He was tall, way taller than you in your tallest heels, and he smelled so damn good. His hair was slicked up and his skin absolutely golden. He wasn’t biting his lip or doing anything to try and hook up with you, but in seconds, you were sopping wet.

No, this was the guy you were gonna fuck tonight.

“I will be,” you answer him, straightening up and pressing yourself up against him. “when you buy me a drink.”

He seems to understand what you’re getting at. He chuckles a bit, eyebrow quirking and you think it’s the hottest shit you’ve ever seen since waterproof scrubs. He helps you straighten up. “I think you’ve had enough drinks already. Can I get you some water?”

“Yes,” you breathe, but not letting go. “But only if you stay with me until I’m finished.”

He smiles, and keeps his hand on your waist as he guides you the bar and orders a cup of water. You sit on the single empty bar stool, and he stands, and you revel in the fact that even on this tall bar stool, he still stands taller than you.

You sip the water, and he leans an elbow on the bar, inches from you.

“So, what brings you stumbling into this bar?”

“I’m here with some coworkers,” you say, and he leans in closer to hear you over the loud music.

“Won’t they be looking for you?”

“Are you trying to get rid of me?” You pout, and he laughs, shaking his head.

“Hell no, I’m just worried.”

“Wow, and they say chivalry is dead.” You fire back, and he laughs again.

“You gonna keep laughing at my jokes or are you gonna ask me to come home with you?” You raise your brows as you sip your water, looking at him over the rim. His expression darkens, but the corner of his mouth sexily turns up.

“I might laugh a little more just to tease, I suppose. Helps build up for later.” He leans up, hand on the bar, but steps a bit closer to you this time. If you leaned up a bit, you’d kiss. He chuckles again, and you can feel his breath on your lips.

You roll your eyes, “Shut up and kiss me already.”

He smiles and leans down, other hand cradling your waist as you reach up and tangle your fingers in his hair, pulling harshly when he slides his tongue into your mouth as soon as you open up for him.

He’s a good kisser. He knows how to move his lips, knows when to pull back to leave you wanting for more, and does that thing where he stops kissing to just peck wetly at your lips before sinking in for more. Hook, line, and sinker. You’re done. “Let’s get out of here, please,” you whimper against his lips, and he smiles, straightening up.

“As you wish. Oh, also what’s your name?”

“Y/N,” you shout over the music. “What about you?”

“You can call me Joon.” He smirks.

The ride to his apartment is blurry, because all you remember is a lot of giggling and trying not to moan at how his hand is so big around your thigh that you have you physically restrain yourself from jumping him on the highway right there. The tires screech as he parks and you both laugh as you stumble into the elevator, giving the security guards watching the cameras a show when you straight up make out with him in the corner of the elevator, his hand up your dress and your hand up his shirt.

He pushes you against his closed door, dropping his keys and jacket on the ground as he undoes the zipper on your dress. You tug at his shirt, “Off,” you whine, and he smiles, stepping back to whip his shirt off with one hand behind his neck.

“Fuck, that’s hot.” you whimper, and he kisses you breathless. “You’ve been saying that all night. Creative, much?”

“Fuck off, I don’t do hook ups much and I’m just telling the truth,” you say, as he gathers you in his arms and literally picks you up and heads to his bedroom. His hands squeeze your ass as he makes his way over, and you catch a glimpse of a neat, tidy living room. His bedroom is clean too, especially for a bachelor. Navy blue sheets, sleek, black furniture, expensive looking place. He was literally so fucking hot.

He drops you on the bed and immediately drapes over you, his jeans rubbing against your soaked panties. He slides his splayed palms up from your waist up to your breasts, mouth following the motion as he laves his tongue over your nipple, palm gently cupping the weight of your breasts in the grip between his thumb and the rest of his fingers. You preen at the sensation, back arching off the bed. “Pants off,” you pant, squirming underneath the warmth of his hands and mouth.

“So bossy,” he comments, smirking as he leans up on his knees to undo his belt. “I dig that.”

You lay back, taking the time to wiggle out of your soaked panties. You thank the gods you chose to wear your new set of lace undies because the rest of your drawer was basically an ocean of white granny panties. He finally drapes back over you, hand gripping your thigh to open you up as he mouths at your neck.

You retaliate by reaching down and gripping his cock, hand squeezing at his base. You can’t really see it because your face is nestled in his shoulder, but you can feel how hard and big he is. He groans at the sensation, nipping at the sensitive skin behind your ear, sending tingles down your spine and your core clenching around nothing.

He props himself up as he looks down at you and slides a finger between your folds. Your yelp dissolves into a drawn out moan. “Oh my god,” you pant, as he slides the flat of two fingers over your bundle of nerves, “please don’t stop that.” You also work your fist over his cock, mouth blubbering nonsense into his neck. He moves the fingers down into your pussy, sliding in with practically no resistance and slowly drawing them in and out your wetness. You don’t really have much time to be embarrassed by the wetness you can hear, because Joon closes his eyes and bites at the soft skin at the top of your breast.

“Shit,” he grits, and he looks down to see the way your wetness glistens on his fingers, “I don’t think I can wait. Are you good?”

You nod eagerly, and you let go of him as he gives you a hard kiss on the mouth and slides a condom on while still fingering you. Its probably not porn-worthy whatever sounds you’re making, but it seems to do the trick because he kisses you even harder and then flips the both of you over so that you’re sitting in his lap. He cradles your waist and descends on your breasts again, tongue circling your sensitive nubs as you sink down on him inch by inch.

When you bottom out, you clench around him. He’s so long and thick, and it’s been a while since your last hook up. It borders on soreness, but the sensation of him moaning with your nipple in between his lips is enough of a distraction for you to work up the nerve to start moving.

It’s embarrassing how turned on right now you are, but Joon seems to be at the same level of deliriousness because he doesn’t stop touching you. From gripping your thighs, to groping your ass, sliding his hands from your waist up to your ribs, tangling in your hair, gently curling around your neck and tightening slightly, he’s literally everywhere.

“Fuck,” you cry out when one of his hands are around your neck, squeezing lightly. You slow down, grinding instead of bouncing, and the new rhythm puts your clit in that perfect position to get stimulated by his pelvis, and his cock hitting that perfect spot inside of you that you find yourself hurtling over the edge much faster than you’d imagined.

He mouths at your cheek and ear, hand still around your neck when you cum, and suddenly he grips your thigh and presses you down against his pillows as he kneels in front of you and begins fucking you hard. The bed knocks against the wall, but you can’t care because the new position has your orgasm prolonged to a point that you’ve never felt before and your mouth just stays open in a mouthless cry against his chest as he tenses and finishes into the condom, mouth panting hoarse compliments into your ear. “Holy shit, your pussy feels so good. So tight, fuck.”

He pulls out and rolls over so he’s not crushing you, and you let out a final breath. “Wow,” you say, chest heaving as he ties the condom and throws it away. He props his head up on an elbow, grinning at you. “That good?” He says cockily, and you turn to lightly punch his chest.

“Don’t get too cocky. It was just one orgasm.”

“But also seems like the best you’ve ever had.” He adds. You roll your eyes and retort, “Well, that’s what you think--,” but your laugh dissolves into a moan again when he reaches over and pulls you underneath him to press a long, wet kiss to your mouth.

“Shut up,” he whispers between kisses, "and kiss me back already.” You smile as he kisses you, fingers tangling in the hair at his nape, and scratching lightly at his shoulder blades. He growls, and moves to your neck. You sigh as he draws more open-mouthed kisses down your neck and torso, and again when a big hand splays over your thigh to hook it over his shoulder. He presses a peck against your folds and looks up at you, and you mewl as he draws the flat of his tongue thickly through your pussy all the way up. You’re a goner.

“I’m gonna make sure you never forget my name.”

The walk of shame isn’t so bad when you basically have no time to waste as you gather your things and glance once back at Joon who’s still sleeping before running down to his lobby. You don’t really care for the disapproving looks you get, as you rush to get into your uber, and immediately thank god that this particular driver offers you a tiny complimentary water bottle. You chug it down, and try not to throw up.

You literally hurtle out of the car when he gets to your place, making a mental note to tip him heftily, seeing the way he booked it when you asked him to hurry a little. You step into a hot shower and don’t even have time to pick up the dirty clothes off the floor as you quickly dress in a white shirt and navy skirt and run out of your apartment to the bus stop.

Thankfully, you make it on time to your interview, and even though the captain gives a small disapproving look to your wet hair tips, he gives you a huge,  bright smile when you tell him you’re a cardio surgeon “taking a break.” When you told him that you used to work as a paramedic before medical school a few years ago, he basically hired you on the spot, babbling on about how much he loves people with more experience.

“So, miss Y/N, what are your interests, your hobbies?” Hoseok trails like a little puppy after you as you walk down the hall from the Fire Captain’s office to your team’s multipurpose room. You frown at him. “Eh,” you brush him off, “not much.”

He smiles, pushing his hair back from his face and trying to stand up tall, “Well, doctor, I love lifting weights and saving damsels in distress. What are you doing later, say, around 5?” You turn on your heel, and he bumps into you, scuttling backwards at the glare you have on your face.

“Look, honey,” you sneer, stepping towards him with a scowl, “You’re cute, but I’m hungover.” you say, scanning him up and down, “And I’m only here for a month and I swear if I have to spend the entire 30 days having you chase me down like a little pet, then I’m probably going to just jump off a building. Okay? So do me a favor, and stop asking me out.”

He gawks at you, and then recovers. “Wait...you’re only here for a month?”

Rolling your eyes, you resume walking towards the wait room. He wasn’t going to stop. “Yes, I’m here just to serve a short community service sentence.”

He hums, following your footsteps again, grinning. “Okay, fine. I won’t try to ask you out. I’ll just keep replaying the part where you said I’m cute over and over again in my head.” He winks at you lightheartedly.

“Here, let me introduce you to the guys.” He walks a bit faster than you as you approach the room, and creaks the door open and lets you in.

As soon as the door swings open, your eyes grow wide as you take in the sight in front of you. In the room, theres a half naked guy digging through the refrigerator, his firefighter’s outfit hanging around his hips. A pair of muscular large ones are wrestling in the corner, also only decked in sweatpants low on their hips. One lounges on the couch in a pair of glasses and a plain white t-shirt and navy uniform pants and boots, while a similarly dressed shorter one is asleep. A tall one is in the corner playing with a tiny puppy. All six of them swivel their heads towards you when you enter.

You wave awkwardly and take a step back to leave when Hoseok bounds in after you and throws an arm around your shoulder, announcing proudly, “Hey guys, this is the new medic hire! Dr. L/N!”  

The one closest to you gives you a smile, taking off his glasses and setting his book aside to reach out a hand. “Hey, I’m Seokjin, captain. Nice to meet you doctor!” He smiles and you make a note of how hot he looks in glasses and how broad his shoulders were.

“You can just call me by my first name, y/n,” you shake his hand, “Likewise.”

Another one that was digging through the fridge approaches you with a piece of gummy candy hanging from his lips. His face is sharp, but he breaks out in a huge smile that lights up his face. “Taehyung! Hi y/n, welcome to Unit 55!”

You shake his hand too, “Thanks. Do you have any firewomen?” You glance around as the pair who were wrestling stop their antics and approach you shyly. The taller one shrugs, his muscles rippling as he does and you make a huge effort not to stare. “No, honestly it’s really hard to find a firewoman these days and they probably don’t like spending time with all guys like us either.”

Taehyung leans over. “That’s Jungkook by the way.”

His partner punches Jungkook’s bicep and turns to you with a show-stopping smile. Oh. The girls would swoon for both of them, you note. They’ll have no problem finding firewomen who want to spend all day with them. “I’m Jimin. And even though this idiot makes us sound like a bunch of goons, it’s just rough being around 7 guys all the time for girls probably. But we’ll do our best to help you get comfortable around here. We’re really fun, I promise!”

You frown, glancing around the room and counting the people you’d met already. Hoseok, Seokjin, Taehyung, Jungkook and Jimin. Which left just the one still asleep somehow through all the commotion on the couch. Seeing your eyes trail over him, Seokjin looks at you over the rims of his glasses, pointing at the sleeping figure with his chin. “Oh, yeah. That’s Yoongi. Good thing he’s not awake cause he’s really grouchy, but he’s also a really good driver so we keep him. You should meet him later when he’s done with his nap.”

You laugh a little, and nod. “And the 7th?”

Jungkook throws on a shirt as he talks. “Namjoon, our unit Battalion Chief. He’s not here right now, but you’ll be able to meet him later. He basically runs this whole thing.”

“Oh I see,” you muse, and give a tight-lipped smile. “Well, maybe I’ll start moving my things in soon. Can you show me my room?”

“Bitch,” Yugyeom sneers as he watches open-mouthed as the guys help unload your car at the station. “You didn’t tell me that all your co-workers were single, hot guys that walked around shirtless all the time.” He frowns at you, ignoring your eye roll, and then switching 180 degrees and laughing and smiling when Taehyung walks by with all your heavy trunks in his arms.

“Hahahaha, Y/N, you’re so funny,” he fakes, and then turns to you with a glint in his eye. “Maybe I should’ve punched that idiot in the face too and I would’ve been here instead.” He hisses, gawking at the way Jungkook and Jimin both easily haul your mattress up the steps. Shirtless, by the way. Again.

You sigh. “It’s only for a month. And honestly, you’re such a fake ass little bitch. You were the one trying to find me a man, and now that I’m surrounded by them, you resent me for it?” you huff. “Oh, Jin, those drawers just go in the closet, thank you.”

“No problem Y/N,” Seokjin grins, pushing up his glasses as he walks past you two easily, holding up the chest of drawers that took both you and Yugyeom an entire twenty minutes to shove in the moving truck. You give him a smile in return and turn back to Yug with a snort. “Wipe your drool.” You laugh, and he closes his mouth with a clack.

“I’ll literally visit you, like all the time, Y/N,” he whispers.

“Please don’t.”

“Oh also,” he turns to you inquisitively. “What happened last weekend? Did you end up going home with that hot guy?”

You pull him closer. “Keep your voice down,” you hiss. “Yes. I fucked him.”

He whistles lowly. “He wasn’t that good?”

Sighing, you check to make sure all the other boys aren’t in the vicinity. “No, that’s the problem. He was too good. I can’t stop thinking about it. Haven’t had a proper orgasm since.”

He looks unsurprised. “Well, when’s the last time you got laid. College?”

“Shut up, asshole,” you frown, “It’s only been like...a few months.”

“Okay, so I guess we’re calling last year’s during our we’re-not-interns-anymore-party a ‘couple months’ ago. It was like 13 months ago.” He points out, and you glare at him.

“Fine,” you snap, “okay? It’s been, like a year. But he was really good, no matter how deprived I’ve been.”

Yugyeom still looks unimpressed, so you pull his sleeve down to whisper in his ear. “I had five orgasms that night.”

He straightens up, turning to you with wide eyes, “FIVE ORGASMS?”

You wince as chief walks by with a stern look, and you pinch Yugyeom in the side as you laugh, “Oh hahahaha, Yugyeom, you’re such a hilarious guy. Why would a patient even talk about those kinds of horrible things in the waiting room?!”

That seems to help as the chief’s expression lightens and he smiles as he grabs a cup of coffee and ascends the stairs again. You drop the smile as soon as the chief is out of earshot and punch Yugyeom hard.

“Little bitch,” you hiss, “are you trying to get me fired?”

He rubs the spot that you punched. “Ow, and no. I’m just shocked. Did you even get his number or something?”

You sigh, watching as the boys come back down to retrieve a couple more things. “No,” you say forlornly, “I literally had to run out for my interview. I only know his name, and I’m not even sure if its right.”

Yugyeom sighs, watching Jungkook and Jimin banter as they come back down.

“Well, at least you have guys like them to keep you company. Did you bring your vibrator along?”

You pinch him again.

With the help of the boys, moving in wasn’t a problem. Surprisingly, the bunk rooms aren’t at all what you’d expected. It was less of a college dorm room style, and more of like a communal housing unit. Apparently, the Seoul station had updated their housing recently, so the inside looked like a newly furnished office hotel, basically.

Jimin was nice enough to move into Hoseok’s room so that you could have the corner room all to yourself, with a private bath attached. It was adequately sized, but there was a nice closet and twin size bed attached, which was an upgrade from the dinky communal on-call room bunk beds that the hospital provided for the residents to sleep in.

There wasn’t even much to unpack, besides a few articles of clothing, a desk and computer for you to do some catching up on hospital paperwork, a mattress so you could sleep on without knots in your back, and your toiletries. You had a uniform anyway, and you were pretty low maintenance. The hospital shifts didn’t really give much space or time to pay attention to your fashion sense or your looks, and it wasn’t going to change now, either.

You make your way downstairs after finishing, with the stairs of course. The boys had kept trying to convince you that you won’t die if you try the pole, but honestly you weren’t down to break your ankle, especially when you were expected to help during an emergency situation. The stairs were fine. You were only on the second floor anyway.

The boys are already eating in the large lounge, and you see that the sleepy fireman had woken up and had starting to cook.

“Y/N!” Jungkook calls, scooting his chair over to make room for you at the center of their table. “Here!”

You smile and set down your phone, taking a seat as Taehyung brings you a tray. Its pasta and steak, with a huge side salad and green beans. You gape at the cook who’s still engrossed in tasting and perfecting the sauce for the pasta.

“Yoongi hyung’s a really good cook,” Jimin says, with a mouthful of salad and steak. With that, the man in question appears behind the younger firefighter and hands him a cup of water. “Don’t eat and talk at the same time. It’s disgusting.” He says with a curled lip, and then gives you a nod.

“You’re the new paramedic hire right?” He asks.

You nod, “Hi, yes. I’m Y/N.” He shakes your hand, nods, and turns away. “Not much of a talker, is he?” You say, and the boys chuckle.

“Yeah,” Hoseok says, “Yoongi’s not really an extroverted type. But he’ll warm up to you, just give it time.”

The rest of the day goes by smoothly. You have to sit in your room for a couple hours though, watching boredly through the instructional training online lessons you had to complete before starting your first day. You’re close to dozing off when a soft knock sounds.

“Yes!” You sit up and turn, and Jungkook appears, smiling sweetly. “Hi, Y/N! What you doin’?”

You stick a thumb at your computer, “Training videos,” you sigh, curling your lip. “Why?”

“Oh, hyungs and I are gonna watch a movie. If you wanna come sit with us in the lounge and do your training or just watch with us, you’re welcome to!”

You pause. “Won’t it be loud? I probably won’t be able to get anything done.”

“I’m pretty sure Seokjin hyung has done basic training before. He can probably give you all the answers to those end-of-lecture quizzes.”

Now there was your incentive to go. You smile, standing up and closing your laptop. “Why didn’t you say that sooner? Let’s go.”

He guides you down to where the lounge is and all the boys chime a nice “hello” or “y/n!” when you appear in the doorway. You can see that a new episode of Game of Thrones is on. You pad over to Seokjin and he smiles when you ask him for the favor, and moves seats to the couch behind so you can sit with him and watch at the same time.

The night goes smoothly, you tapping Seokjin everytime you finish a lesson and him pausing to quickly finish the quizzes, and you joining in with the debates about the show occasionally. Yoongi brings out some snacks, and eventually Jimin brings out a blanket for you, and by the end of the episode, your training is finished and you’re sipping on soda and eating pizza.

It’s nice, you think, a lot nicer than the hospital. You were used to the competitive nature of medicine. It was always competing against the other residents or interns to get a spot that had ridiculously low acceptance rates. There was always no time to relax. This wasn’t bad at all.

But you shake your head. This was temporary. A break. No need to get attached. They’re just being hospitable. You give a tight lipped smile as the episode ends and you take your laptop and blanket with you as you stand. “Thanks, guys, for inviting me. I’m gonna turn in tonight.” you say, slowly shuffling away. “Good night!” Taehyung yells, and the other boys chime in one by one.

You set your stuff down in your room and get ready for bed. Laying in your single bed, with no one else snoring or sleep talking, and with no post-surgery fatigue to get you straight to sleep, it’s hard. You end up staring up at the ceiling of your room, sighing as you try to think of the most boring topics in the world to try and get to sleep.

“Just a few weeks, y/n.” you murmur, turning onto your side.

You’re finally dozing off when suddenly, the intercom you had no idea was located right outside your door bursts to life. “Code 904B Building Fire. Code 904B Building Fire.”

You scramble up, throwing your covers back as you stick your head out into the hallway. The lights are flashing brightly, but you can hear the sounds of the boys in each room getting ready. The first one out into the hallway is Taehyung, and he jogs up to you. “Put on your uniform, y/n,” he pants, “and meet us downstairs as soon as possible. We gotta go, and since it’s a building fire, there might be a few injuries you can help us with.”

“Okay,” you nod, as the rest of the boys begin appearing in the hallway with navy shirts on and their firemen overalls already on. They one by one disappear down the pole and you scramble to get the paramedic bodysuit on. You pull on your boots hastily and then sprint down the stairs, and see the chief addressing everyone.

“Alright, Yoongi and half of you in car 1, and the rest of you in mine. Namjoon is already in his way from his meeting, so he’ll meet us there. Let’s go!” The boys break out into jogs as they hurriedly begin packing the hoses tightly and jumping into the cars. “Chief,” you call out, “Where can I go?”

“Go with Yoongi!” He yells, and drives off, sirens wailing. You jump into the first car and immediately you’re surprised when Yoongi, usually lethargic and slow, slams on the accelerator and your own truck bolts into life. Stumbling into a seat, you ask Hoseok, “So, this is how it always happens?”

He nods solemnly, his usual playful smile gone. “24/7. We gotta stay alert.” You nod. He points to a large, bright orange utility box in the corner of the bus. “That’s your medic kit. You can look through it now if you want, we’ll be getting to the site in a few minutes.”

You nod, perching the box on the seat next to you and digging through it. It was pretty basic, syringes, bottles of lidocaine and epinephrine for stitch jobs, synthetic thread, scalpels, bandaids, alcohol, gauze, and more. You were used to working with the minimum at the emergency room. And seemed like whoever was in charge of this box had kept it neatly and pretty well-stocked. You lock the box when the truck begins to slow, and look out the window to see the commotion.

A large building has caught on fire, and already there are two other trucks unloading at the site, their firefighters already hooking up their hoses onto the fire hydrants and assembling into position to enter the building for any remaining people. The whole area smells like smoke and through it, the glow of the orange fire against the night sky is barely visible.

Immediately as the truck parks, the boys in the vehicle spring to motion. Their uniforms are already on, helmets, gloves, and oxygen tanks and all. One by one they jog out the door of the truck and do the same, unloading the hose from the side of the firetruck and linking it easily to the fire hydrant and getting ready to spray down the building.

You pull your hair back into a ponytail and look around for anyone who might be in need of help. There’s already a few survivors out around the area in the grass, and you run over to a woman laying down.

“Ma’am, are you okay?” You say as you approach her and kneel next to her. Her husband is crying. “Sir! Is she okay? What happened?”

“P-please! We were just picking up our son and then the burning piece of wood fell on her leg. No one has been able to h-help her yet! Our son is still in that building, too!”

You unlocked your box and reassured him, “Okay, sir, I need you to calm down and help me. Someone will go find your son, but we need to help your wife right now. Do you have a phone on you? Can you use the flashlight? I need to see the area.”

He does as you instruct with shaky hands, and you carefully use the scissors in the kit to cut a strip down her pants. The burn is quite bad and covers a lot of surface area, in addition to having a huge laceration down her thigh that needs to be stitched up now, in case of infection or bleeding out. You frown, she must have been in a lot of pain.

“Ma’am, can you understand me? This is going to be a bit painful, but I need to sanitize the area.”

She’s just sobbing at this point, but you can make out some words. “Please,” she sobs, “M-my s-son!”

You lean closer, “Sorry? Your son?”

She sobs and nods, “H-he’s still inside!!” She pushes your hands away from her leg, “I won’t be treated until I find him!”

You sigh, turning around to see if there are any firefighters available. You see one coming out of the building to replace his oxygen tank. You run up to him, unable to see anything but his eyes through the protective gear he was wearing.

“Hey! Hey, this woman I’m trying to treat is refusing treatment until she sees her son, and she claims he’s still inside. Please, if she doesn’t let me treat it right now, she might have to amputate her leg.” He nods, and follows you to the couple.

When they see him approaching, the woman goes hysterical. “Please!” She screams, “He’s still in there, on the second floor. I haven’t seen anyone bring him out!”

“Okay, ma’am, I’m going to go back inside for him. You need to calm down, and let this lady treat your leg, or else it could get worse. You need to stay strong for your son.”

She nods, and turns to you. You spring into action, giving the firefighter a nod as he stands. You frown, his voice sounded so familiar, but you couldn’t pinpoint it.

The lady begins wailing as the adrenaline fades and the pain of her injury begins to hit. You have her husband hold her hand as you pour some alcohol on the area and she wails as the open cut is cleaned out.

Quickly, you stitch up the wound and dress the burns so that they’re manageable. She refuses to take the ambulance to the hospital until she sees her son, so you coax her into just sitting on the gurney in the ambulance and wait for her son. You try and calm down the couple as you move onto address a few more people in the vicinity with minor cuts, scrapes, and burns.

Suddenly, you hear a commotion, and you turn to the building that’s now less of a bonfire and more of a quiet smolder, and the firefighter from earlier emerges with something in his arms.

The woman you had treated earlier immediately starts wailing and crying as the firefighter jogs over to you and her and sets a boy down onto a gurney. He’s unconscious, and the firefighter whips off his helmet as he addresses you.

“He’s breathed in quite a bit of smoke, and fell unconscious when I picked him up. He needs pediatric CPR!”

“Namjoon!” Hoseok cries out.

You gawk as you watch him yell instructions at you and the rest of the firefighters you’d met, brows furrowing and eyes widening as you recognize those slanted eyes, thick lips and angled jawline that you’d run your tongue over that one fateful night. It was Joon. He was a firefighter. His name was Namjoon.

“Y/N!” He grabs you by the shoulders, “Focus!”

You immediately spring into action, running towards the boy and checking his pulse. “Do you know how to do compressions on a pediatric patient?” You breathe, and Joon nods, throwing his helmet and his tank aside and opening the buttons on his uniform jacket before he climbs atop the gurney.

As he begins compressions, you deliver some shots on his arm and search his body for any large cuts or burns. You hook him up to an oxygen mask and turn up the machine to high. “Switch!” You call out, and your hands replace Joon’s as you climb atop him and begin compressions.

“One, two, three...” You count out, as other paramedics swarm around you to prepare him to be delivered to the hospital as soon as possible.

The boy stirs, and you stop compressing, and watches as he begins coughing, from deep within, and you help remove his oxygen mask and pull him up to a sitting position as he continues coughing the smoke and ash out of his lungs. A paramedic gives him some water and after the boy finishes coughing, you help him sip some water as he recovers.

The others help usher him onto a gurney and also help his mother and father join the ambulance.

You watch as the blaring sirens fade away and sigh as the remaining firefighters douse the building in water and put out the flames. Your knees are feeling weak, your heart up in your throat, and your breath short.

Feeling a presence standing next to you, you turn and meet eyes with him. You narrow your eyes at him, giving him a once over from his ash-stained angular face to the bulky equipment and uniform lining his body. Probably from the boots he was wearing, he seemed even taller than from the club.

He gives you a cocky grin. “So, you’re a paramedic, huh?”

You roll your eyes, stopping down to collect your materials and all the wrappers of the syringes and needles you had used to treat your patients.

“Not a paramedic, a doctor. On voluntary community service.” You huff.

He stoops down too, setting his helmet aside to help with your tools. “No wonder you’re good with your hands.”

You stop, sitting on your haunches to give him a look. He does the same, matching your cold gaze with a smirk. “I think that’s very unprofessional, Mr. Joon.”

You stand, locking the paramedic box angrily and stomp away.

But he easily catches up to you, having those damned long legs of his, and follows you to your truck. It makes you angrier that he begins unloading his equipment and uniform off into the same truck you came in.

“I think, Y/N, the moment you started making out with me at that club, professionalism was kind of thrown out the window, don’t you think? You disappear that morning without a trace, and then suddenly you appear again at my workplace. Don’t you think I have the right to be a bit confused and curious?”

“Look.” You turn to him. “That was a one-night thing. I told you that I don’t do them often, and it was a mistake and I’m sorry, I won’t do that to you again. So just--” you throw your hands into the air, frustrated that he looked so goddamn good as he took off his thick outer coat and stood in front of you with just a black t-shirt and the pants of his uniform low on his hips. “--just pretend it didn’t happen. Just forget about it.”

You turn to walk away into the truck, but he stops you. “Wait! Wait wait wait, Y/N,” he turns to face you, the smirk wiped away and now brows attractively collecting in a frown, “For the record, I don’t consider that night as a mistake.”

“Huh?” Your eyes widen as you frown up at him.

He doesn’t look away. The playfulness has dropped and he’s completely serious as his voice takes a lower tone.

“Sleeping with you wasn’t a mistake for me. Don’t apologize. I’ve only been able to think about you since then, and I don’t think that you showing up here out of all the other precincts or departments is another mistake, either. I’m sorry if I came on too strong, but I want to be clear with you that my intentions are to get to know you better, and do it the right way.”

“Do what the right way?”

“Date you,” he says simply, like he was talking about the goddamn weather.

Literally, who was this guy? Your mind was completely blank. Like, who just says exactly what they’re thinking? How could he just be so...honest? What’s his game?

You blubber out the first thing that comes to mind. “I don’t date co-workers. Especially here. I’m only scheduled to volunteer for several weeks.”

He seems to gain a bit of confidence. “Y/N, that sounds more like an excuse, than it does a reason.”

You huff, blowing your hair out of the way. “Nonetheless, the answer is no.”

He nods thoughtfully. “Don’t be surprised if I ask you again.”

And he does.

Every. Single. Day.

When you wake up, “Hey, Y/N, will you go on a date with me?”

“No,” you’d say, roll your eyes, and spit out your toothpaste.

When you’re in the library, reading up on the latest studies. He’ll pop his head in and say, “Oh, Y/N, dinner’s ready.”

When you look up and nod, “Thanks. I’ll be right there.”

He’ll nod back, and then say, “Oh by the way, will you go on a date with me?”

You’d learned to just laugh it off or ignore him.

When you’re in the dining commons. You’ll be chatting with Taehyung about something and Namjoon will walk by, hand you a mug of coffee, and walk away without a word. When you lift the coffee up to drink it after Taehyung leaves for something, you find a slip of paper on the saucer.

Will you go on a date with me?

You crumple up the paper while maintaining eye contact and drop it into the steaming cup of coffee. Then, you stand, and pour the mug out into the trash, while he watches with an amused smirk.

The only times he doesn’t ask you out is when you’re on calls.

Over the next few weeks, you notice that Namjoon has three modes: 1) His Chief mode, 2) his off-duty mode, and 3) his flirting-with-you mode. Modes 2 and 3 tended to mix, especially when he was with you.

But whenever that light on the walls of the department begin to ring and flash, indicating an emergency call, Namjoon immediately enters his chief-mode. One time, he was in the middle of taunting you with probable bad-date ideas, the lights began flashing and you had watched as he shook himself out of his off-duty mode, and immediately started barking out orders to the group and you, responding to the dispatch on his walkie-talkie. It had happened in a millisecond.

You were in the lounge with Seokjin and Jimin, watching a movie while Yoongi dozed off in one of the couches. You had slowly begun to easily sink into this lifestyle. You guys were lucky if you got at least a few hours in between calls to relax, and since the most recent call was a small issue with some old lady’s cat up in a tree, Hoseok and Taehyung had volunteered to go on their own. It was a relaxing Thursday afternoon.

Like clockwork, right as you were almost dozing off, the lights began to flash and blare as your walkie-talkies exploded to life and the dispatch officer began reading out the issue.

The boys spring to life, immediately jumping over to the pole and going downstairs to change into their uniforms. You sigh and use the stairs to run down to the garage and get into your uniform, clambering into the truck as Namjoon begins listing out orders. It was a gas leak in a chemical factory, and they wanted the firemen to take care of it. You were only following for protocol.

“It shouldn’t be too complicated. Yoongi, did you contact the engineers to shut off the power?” Namjoon asks.

“Yeah, they turned off all electricity, but they can’t turn off the gas valve. It’s stuck.”

“Okay, that’ll be the first thing to take care of. Jungkook, can you take care of that?”

You watch as the firetrucks pull in and follow the men into the warehouse. It’s completely dark but they all turn on their headlights as they treck through.

Namjoon leads them into the main gas chamber where one of the tanks is steadily leaking a stream of cold, compressed air out of it. Him and Jungkook immediately head over and begin working together to tighten the valve, while Seokjin begins looking for the pipe that leads into the tank.

You watch, boredly as the men do their thing, when suddenly, Jungkook yanks a bit too hard and both him and Namjoon are thrown back.

Jungkook immediately begins yelling out, and you scramble up in horror to see that he’d been thrown back into a piece of metal that was sticking out.

“Oh my god,” you cry out as you rush to his side. “Jungkook, hold on, I got you. Can you turn on your side so I can see the wound better?”

He moves while wincing in pain, but manages to maneuver so that the wound on his back is facing you. Using a flashlight, you make sure that the metal didn’t pierce any vital organs or arteries, and reassure him that it’s okay as you begin cleaning and stitching up the wound. After you’re finished, you look up to see Seokjin run into the room, and let you all know that he’d disassembled the valve and fixed the leak.

You sigh in relief as you cut the final thread and place some gauze over the stitches. Hoseok and Jimin had returned to help, and they throw Jungkook’s arms over their shoulders as they help him walk out of the building. You begin to pack your things, when you see Namjoon lagging behind the rest of the group, clutching his arm.

You catch up to him, “Hey, are you okay?”

He winces, but nods at you to go. “I’m fine. Catch up with the rest of them. I’ll be right behind you.”

You frown as you survey his features. The boys are now out of sight and you and Namjoon are the only ones left inside the chamber. “No, you don’t look very okay. Did you get hurt?”

He finally relents, groaning in pain as you guide him to sit down on some steps and remove his jacket. You gasp as his t-shirt comes off. Jungkook had been impaled when he hit the wall as he was thrown back, but it seemed that Namjoon had been in the direct line of contact when the valve of the pipe had blown off. It had sliced through his uniform and left quite a deep cut in his rib.

“Holy shit, Namjoon, you are not okay. Let me stitch this up right now.”

He shakes his head, “Let’s get out of here, first.”

You push him back. “If you keep moving, this wound is too close to your vital organs and it might cause infection or you might bleed out. Why didn’t you say you were hurt?”

He shakes his head as you begin unpacking your box of materials. For the first time in your few weeks at the department, you see a dark look of shame and regret written over his face. “I was the one who asked Jungkook to help me, if I didn’t, he wouldn’t be hurt.”

You click your tongue at him as you clean the wound, apologizing as he hisses in pain at the contact of alcohol. “You know, you say a lot of stupid shit, but that’s one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard you say to me. Ever.”

He laughs a little at that, wincing as it puts pressure on his side. You glare at him as you examine the wound and begin numbing the surrounding skin. “You’re a great chief, you know that. I’m administering some pretty heavy painkillers. Tell me when you start getting a bit woozy.”

He just silently watches you hover over his torso, squinting as you maneuver the hook needle and stitch him up. “I think that’s the first time you ever complimented me, Y/N.”

You roll your eyes, “Oh, so now your chief mode is off, I guess.”

He furrows his brows. “Chief mode?”

You nod, snipping at the threads as you begin another stitch.

“You have these modes you enter on the job. One of them is when you become this intense, no-nonsense leader, telling us all what to do and what to get done.”

He smiles, “And the other mode?”

“There’s two actually,” you say, still focused on his wound, “There’s one that’s always flirting with me, and there’s a third, where I can see that you really, really care for everyone on this team. That third one is the mode you’re in.”

“Are you maybe getting turned on by that mode, Y/N?” He winks at you, and you laugh, poking him in his side and making him groan out as you finish dressing the clean wound and help him get his uniform jacket back on. “Shut up, now your flirty mode is back on too.”

You’re cleaning up the materials in your box when suddenly, the lights come back on, bright white, and as you and Namjoon are squinting to try and reassess your surroundings, the huge gate to the chamber closes with a hissing noise and a loud clang.

“Shit,” you hear Namjoon cuss, and you scramble up, running over to the door and searching for a handle, a knob, or a button, anything to get it back open. You click your walkie-talkie, waiting for the static to sound to let you know that it’s communicating, but there’s nothing.

“No use,” he winces, zipping up his jacket, “The company probably just turned the electricity on when they saw some of the trucks leaving.”

You watch in horror as the vents surrounding you begin hissing and cold air begins drafting in. “What is this?”

“It’s a containment chamber for flammable chemicals, so I assume that it stays at a cool temperature. It’s fine, some of the boys will probably realize we’re here and be back in no time.” He lays down against the steps.

“Namjoon!” You scramble over, “Do not fall asleep, do you hear me? The temperature dropping is going to make your wound even worse. You need to stay warm, stand up if you can.”

He frowns, curling into himself with a pout. “I’m cold.”

You roll your eyes. It was the painkillers kicking in. He was getting lethargic, and it could kill him. “I know, you big fat baby, but if we don’t start warming up, we might die in here. C’mon, stand up.”

He begins moving around, although you instruct him not to stress his wound, he begins rocking around on his legs to try and make some body heat. You do the same, waving your arms around and trying to generate some heat.

At one point, you lose complete sense of time, and Namjoon wakes up from the initial wave of his painkillers to find the both of you huddled in the corner of the chamber, knees curled into your torsos as you shiver in the cold.

“Y-Y/N,” he breathes, and reality dawns on him as he sees the mist of his breath fan out from his mouth. “Y/N?”

“S-s-so cold,” you chatter, curling into him as he puts his good arm around your shoulders and pulls you closer.

“D-don’t fall asleep,” he breathes, and you don’t respond, the chills rocking your entire shaking body as you curl into him further.

The walkie-talkie screeches for a moment, and Namjoon grabs it, responding back to the static. “H-hello? Anyone! Y/N and I are stuck in the main chamber! Temperature is dropping quickly. Hello?!”

The only response is static as he drops the walkie-talkie to just pull you in closer. “Y/N?”

There’s no response, and when he pulls back to try and look at you, your head lulls in his arms.

“Shit,” he mutters, “Y/N, Y/N!” He shakes you, but you’re completely unconscious in his arms. "Wake up!”

“No no no no no,” he chants, as he begins undressing, his whole body resisting the motions as he shivers in the cold, but he perseveres. He pulls his uniform open, baring his chest, and then proceeds to unbutton your uniform as well, baring a t-shirt underneath. He pulls your limp body close as he removes the t-shirt and then completely drapes himself over you, pressing your bare chests together as he pulls you tight against him, skin to skin.

He pulls the uniform tighter around your back so that you don’t lose any more body heat, when he finally hears yelling and pounding on the other side of the huge gate. He hugs you closer to himself before everything goes black, too.

[kinksvt]

let me watch (m)

→ pairing: jeonghan x reader, wonwoo x reader, mingyu x reader, soonyoung x reader

♕ summary: when your coworkers come over for drinks, the night takes a not so unexpected turn.

✱ genre/warnings: overstimulation, degradation, dirty talk, rough sex, anal, double penetration, little bit of boy kissing boy action (not much)

✱ word count: 6.8k+

a/n: hello everyone!! so sorry it took me forever to post so hopefully this very long (and very sinful) smut makes up for it!! enjoy! :D

Today went by oddly slow for you. At your job, not very many people had come in to cash checks, open an account, etc. You sighed as you checked the time to see you still had over half an hour left until you could go home. Outside of your office you could see only one person talking your coworker at the front desk.

"Hey Y/N, you got a minute?" A voice said suddenly, when you shut your eyes for a quick second. It was your coworker and one of the first people you made friends with when you started working.

"Hey Mingyu! What's up?"

He walked inside of your office, "I was wondering if you wanted to come with me and a few other of my friends for drinks tonight? Since today's been really slow?"

"Sure! Who else is coming?" You replied, grinning.

"Just Wonwoo, and Soonyoung," Mingyu flashed a smile. "We can meet in the lot after work?"

"Sounds like a plan." You returned a smile to Mingyu as he left your office.

You were close with Mingyu and you only talked to Soonyoung once or twice for information on some accounts you were closing. You hadn't met Wonwoo yet and you were a bit nervous to. You pulled your phone out to text your boyfriend, Jeonghan.

[5:26 pm] You: hey baby! im gonna get some drinks with some friends after work, is that alright?

You and Jeonghan never really had an exactly "strict" relationship, per se. You weren't in a poly relationship, but not exactly a monogamous one either. Jeonghan didn't mind if guys looked, or touched, because he knew at the end of the day, you would still be his. He trusted you with his entire being and you never took advantage of that.

[5:27 pm] Jeonghan: girls or guys?

[5:27 pm] You: guys

[5:27 pm] Jeonghan: of course

[5:28 pm] Jeonghan: or

[5:28 pm] Jeonghan: you could bring the drinks to them?

[5:28 pm] You: what do you mean?

[5:29 pm] Jeonghan: invite them over, i wanna meet them

[5:29 pm] You: jeonghan dont be gay

[5:30 pm] Jeonghan: shut up haha, just come back home with them. plus i already miss you and i dont wanna spend anymore time alone

[5:30 pm] You: hmm, alright we'll see..

[5:31 pm] Jeonghan: heh, i love you baby

[5:31 pm] You: i love you too jeong, ill see you soon

It was finally closing time and you gathered your things, heading to the back towards the parking lot. You said goodbye to familiar faces and pushed the heavy door open. Just as Mingyu said, he and his two friends were waiting. You recognized Soonyoung but Wonwoo, was much more attractive than you were imagining. His hair was dark and slightly curly, round glasses sat on the bridge of his nose. Wonwoo was unbelievably handsome and you couldn't help but silently admire his looks.

"Oh, there she is- Y/N!" Mingyu said, snapping you out of your daze.

You blushed faintly as you walked towards them, looking down at the ground—missing the way Wonwoo scanned over your body. "Hi," you spoke shyly.

"Y/N, this is Soonyoung," Mingyu gestured towards the latter as you two bowed your heads politely. "And this is Wonwoo."

You nervously bowed at Wonwoo also while he did the same.

"So, should we head to Lee's Bar downtown?" Soonyoung questioned, rubbing his hands together.

"A-Actually! Uhm, I was wondering if we could make a change of plans?" You interrupted. You continued when all three of the men looked at you, "I-I was thinking that we could just, head to my house? And drink there?"

The men all glanced at each other curiously. "How come?" Mingyu asked.

"Well, we wouldn't have to pay-"

"I'm in," Wonwoo said, earning a laugh from the other two—and a slight giggle from you.

"Let's go!" Soonyoung said, skipping happily to his car.

...

The guys followed your car as you drove home, which gave you plenty of time to call Jeonghan and let him know that you four were on the way.

"Are they cute?"

You rolled your eyes as your boyfriend's laughter played in the background.

"C'mon, it's been so long since we had others join. Don't you think it'd be fun, kitten?"

"Jeonghan!" You exclaimed.

You heard Jeonghan laugh from the other line. "I'll see you at the house, kitten." Jeonghan ended the phone call, leaving you to internally, and not so internally, curse.

Damn him for turning you on.

...

"Wow, what a nice house!" Soonyoung shouted, closing his car door.

You forced a slight laugh, "Thanks." You headed up to the front door, fumbling to get your keys out.

"Are you okay, Y/N?" Wonwoo asked, putting his hand on your shoulder.

Before you could respond, the door unlocked and opened, revealing your boyfriend with a big smile on his face. "Hello!"

Mingyu, Wonwoo and Soonyoung had confused looks on their faces as they all looked at you.

"Uh, guys, this is Jeonghan, my boyfriend."

You all walked inside the house and introduced them all. Jeonghan guided everyone to the kitchen where he began getting out different assorted drinks you two had in your cabinets.

Mingyu pulled you to the side, "Is it okay for us to be here? I mean like- is your boyfriend okay with it?"

"Oh yeah! He actually, uh, suggested it. He wanted to meet you all."

"Oh? Okay, I was just making sure." Mingyu smiled, showing off his canines which made you internally gush.

You and Mingyu joined the rest, who were laughing and seemed comfortable already. Everyone sat around the island, some drinking beer, some drinking wine.

"So how long have you and Y/N been dating?" Wonwoo asked Jeonghan.

Jeonghan looked at you, smiling. "Two years."

You nodded as Wonwoo's eyes flickered between the both of you. What neither of you knew though, was how hot of a couple Wonwoo thought you two were.

...

As the night progressed, everyone got more relaxed and loose. Soonyoung got more giggly, Wonwoo more flirty, Mingyu more shy and Jeonghan more suggestive. And you? You just knew something was bound to happen.

"Alright! Let's play 21 questions!" Jeonghan slurred slightly, opening up another can of beer.

"I didn't know we were back in grade school." You joked. "We might as well play Spin the Bottle and Seven Minutes in Heaven while we're at it."

Jeonghan smirked, his hand wrapping around your waist. "Well, the night is still young."

The guys drunkenly laughed as Soonyoung grabbed an empty bottle of wine you all had finished earlier. "Okay," he said as he spun the bottle.

"Wait, are we playing spin the bottle or 21 questions?" Wonwoo asked, confused.

"21 questions dumb dumb!" Jeonghan shouted, followed by a giggle.

"Alright, alright I'm sorry." Wonwoo held his hand up in defense, downing a shot of vodka.

"I'll spin first!" Jeonghan leaned over the island and spun the wine bottle, landing on Mingyu. "Hm, Mingyu." He said, pausing. "How many people have you slept with?"

Mingyu's eyes widened. He stuttered, glancing between Jeonghan and you. "U-Uhm, I, I-I don't-"

"Jeonghan! We didn't say this was going to be dirty!" You punched his shoulder, making him wince.

"C'mon Mingyu, how many?" Jeonghan poked, taking a sip of his beer.

Mingyu hummed before answering a quiet "3."

"Aw, so cute Mingyu!" Wonwoo threw his arm around Mingyu's shoulder, kissing the top of his head as he struggled to get out of his grip.

Mingyu's cheeks blushed while he spun the bottle landing on you. "Uh, Y/N, ahem, are you, a virgin?"

You smiled amusedly, curious to why Mingyu thought you were.

"She was before she met me." Jeonghan informed, winking at Mingyu.

You pursed your lips into a thin line, as you took a large chug of wine and spun in return. "Soonyoung, have you ever had a wet dream?"

Soonyoung coughed loudly, his drink going down the wrong pipe. He held his chest as Mingyu patted his back harshly. You smirked as you finished off your drink, feeling as confident and suggestive as your boyfriend. "I-I, I don't know? Maybe?"

You smiled deviously, succeeding in making him flustered. Soonyoung spun the bottle, trying to hide the warmth that spread across his face. "Uhm, Jeonghan." Soonyoung hesitated before continuing, "Where's the craziest place you've, done it?"

Jeonghan couldn't help but smile whilst thinking of the place.

It was during the summertime last year when you and Jeonghan stayed with one of his friends.

You wore an outfit that was slightly revealing, knowing it would mess with Jeonghan.

What you didn't know though, was that it would end up with him dragging you into the bathroom and fucking you on the sink. He held his hand over your mouth because you two had to be quiet, which only turned the both of you on even more. His friend was just in the kitchen, feet away.

Jeonghan could still hear you cries of pleasure in his mind, your whimpers and whines trying their best to stay silent.

He remembered the day vividly—a little too vividly.  "A-Anyway!" Jeonghan said, twirling the bottle and feeling his pants get tight.

"But Jeonghan you didn't-" Soonyoung started.

"I SAID ANYWAY." Jeonghan retorted back as Soonyoung shrunk in his seat. The neck of the bottle pointed at you and Jeonghan smirked. "Y/N," he began.

Uh oh. You had a bad feeling about this.

"If you had to fuck anyone here, who would it be?"

The room fell silent. The guests' hearts felt as if they stopped.

Why would Jeonghan ask such a question?

Even if they thought it wasn't appropriate for Jeonghan to ask, they all still found themselves on edge for your answer. They all desperately wanted it to be them.

Your cheeks felt as if they were on fire, you probably looked like a tomato in front of your friends, and your douchebag, horny boyfriend. "I don't want to answer that." Was all you could manage to get out as you looked into your glass and took a drink, avoiding eye contact with any of the boys.

You wanted to absolutely vanish into thin air right then and there. You knew Jeonghan didn't have any shame in you confessing who you wish to have sex with. But having to choose between three of your friends? In front of them?

"C'mon babe, I know that you find at least one of them attractive in that way." Jeonghan stated, eyeing each of the boys.

"Jeonghan, you are seriously making me feel uncomfortable. I can only imagine how they must feel." You refused to make eye contact with anything breathing until you were alone.

"I wanna know.." You looked up, meeting Wonwoo's gaze. He was looking at you, like he had been this entire night.

Wonwoo thought it was adorable how confident you were just minutes ago compared to how flustered and shy you are now. "Come on Y/N, don't be nervous. We all wanna know."

With that, everyone else's confidence was restored and they all waited on your answer.

"I-I don't know," you stuttered.

It's not that you didn't know. Hell, it wasn't even because you didn't want to answer. It was just, how were you supposed to choose only one? How were you supposed to confess that you'd screw everyone here?

"We won't be offended." Mingyu said, raising his eyebrow whilst speaking.

"Okay," you sighed. You closed your eyes and nervously breathed in. "I don't know how to choose." You simply said and the boys all looked at each other.

"Well, like Mingyu said, we won't be offended." Soonyoung mentioned.

"It's not that," you paused and took another breath in. "I just can't pick only one of you."

Soonyoung, Wonwoo and Mingyu's ears all perked up.

"Huh?" Mingyu made a noise.

Jeonghan smirked as his plan started to come together.

"Uhm, w-what I'm saying is that I'd-"

"She's saying she'd fuck all of you guys, okay?" Jeonghan stated, nonchalantly—opening yet another can of beer.

The room was still silent, aside from Jeonghan's slurping noises from next to you. You were actually kind of turned on, and so were the rest of the guys.

Jeonghan knew what everyone in the room wanted and he wasted no time in saying so. "Are we gonna all fuck or what? I'm getting kinda hard over here." You felt your cheeks getting warm at his question. Jeonghan took a few more sips and he exhaled loudly, standing up. "Come here kitten." He said, making your eyes widen in embarrassment.

"Jeonghan-" you began but he cut you off before you could finish. You were so flustered and for some strange reason, it turned you on. Jeonghan grabbed your wrist, taking you to the living room and the boys watched you two with their eyes.

Wonwoo turned to the other boys and mouthed, "Kitten?"

The two shrugged in response, looking back to you and Jeonghan.

"Jeonghan, what are you doing?" You hissed as he glanced over to the boys. They all looked at you both intensely, watching your every move and waiting for the next.

Smirking, he leaned down in your ear and whispered. "We're gonna give them a show." Jeonghan grabbed your chin and pulled your head closer to him, trapping your lips in a kiss. He held your jaw as you gasped in surprise. It felt wrong doing this in front of others, even though you've done it before. So, why did it feel so different now? How will things be after this? Will it be normal? Will things be awkward at work now?

All of those thoughts flew out of your mind when Jeonghan pushed his tongue into your mouth, making you moan softly. The boys all heard it and gulped, blood rushing down to all of their cocks. They watched as you and Jeonghan made out, seeing the different roles being played. You, of course, were the submissive and the fact it was so obvious how much power Jeonghan had over you, was—to say the least—extremely hot. Jeonghan had your face in his hand, him leading the kiss and you melting over it, following his steps. He grabbed your waist with his other hand and pulled you closer, making you feel his cock press against you. The others didn't know what to do, watching with drooling mouths and desperate eyes.

After you two made out for, what seemed like hours, Jeonghan pulled away. Both of your lips dark pink, glistening with each other's saliva. Jeonghan chuckled, "Get on your knees." You swallowed, his words affecting you to no end and you obeyed his command. Keeping eye contact, you lowered yourself to the ground and waited. "Watch and learn boys. Soon, you'll be able to be in this position. If you want to, of course." Jeonghan said to your audience. He began to unbutton his pants when midway he motioned his head to toward them to come closer.

Mingyu, Wonwoo and Soonyoung looked at one another, hesitantly standing up awkwardly. With their cocks hardening quickly, they moved slowly to the couch that was a couple feet behind you.

Jeonghan spoke to you in a hushed voice, "Look at how hard they all are already kitten." His eyebrow was raised, looking at the three and he shuffled out of his pants.

You looked back at them, noting the slight blush on their cheeks and—just as Jeonghan said—their stiff cocks, straining against their jeans. You bit your lip and took a leap of faith. "You guys can take those off if you want," you whispered, giving them all an innocent look.

Wonwoo was the first to move, smirking at you and undoing his belt. The others followed suit, making you smile to yourself. Jeonghan grabbed your chin and made you face him. He had his underwear on still, his hard cock evident against it. Jeonghan gave you a look, silently telling you to get going. "How about you show your little friends what that pretty mouth can do, hm?"

Nodding, you looked up at him as you slid your fingers underneath the waistband, beginning to drag them down his legs. Jeonghan's cock sprung out and you didn't hesitate to shuffle closer, kissing his head.

He hummed, running his fingers through your hair and gathering it all in a ponytail. Jeonghan mumbled, "Come on kitten, don't tease me."

You felt yourself blushing once more at Jeonghan using your pet name on you. You felt exposed now that they all knew you liked being called that. Doing as he said, you took Jeonghan's length in your hand and wrapped your lips around it. Jeonghan threw his head back, moaning and guiding your head slowly with his hand that held all of your hair. You stroked the part of his cock that you couldn't take, knowing already how to get Jeonghan close to the edge in minutes.

The others merely stared at you in awe. They all wondered how it must feel to be sucked off by you; from the way Jeonghan is moaning and groaning, it has be good. Mingyu bit his lip, swallowing and holding back his moans. Soonyoung was teasing the head of his cock, imagining he was Jeonghan instead and his hand was yours. Wonwoo stroked himself languidly, the tip an angry red; he's never been this turned on before in a long time. They all enjoyed watching you, the only noise filling the room being the pornographic sucking and gagging noises.

"Does it feel good?" Soonyoung asked quietly.

Jeonghan opened his eyes, looking at Soonyoung with half-lidded eyes. "God, yes. She always does." He took his lip between his teeth, looking back down at you.

You bobbed your head quick on Jeonghan's cock, slowing down when you started pulling off. An advantage of Jeonghan being completely whipped for you? Being able to get him off quicker than the average man because he enjoys what you do to him that much.

Jeonghan's moans started getting higher and more frequent, signaling that he was getting close. You took your hand and gently played with his balls, making him moan loudly. As best as you could, you took all of him in your mouth until his length hit the back of your throat. "Kitten," he rasped. "I'm gonna cum." Jeonghan threw his head back and his mouth opened, releasing a long, loud whine—cumming in your mouth.

You released his length with a pop noise and swallowed his cum, knowing it would please him even more. Jeonghan said and ran his fingers through your hair. "Such a good kitten for me." He smirked and leaned down to kiss you.

You whimpered as Jeonghan bit your lip and stood up straight, looking at the boys who were pleasing themselves. He walked over beside the couch they were on, in all of his naked glory. "How does another show sound, guys?"

They all glanced over at him.

"Another show?" Soonyoung questioned.

Jeonghan gave you a look and you nodded, knowing what he meant.

You unbuttoned your pants, slowly moving them down your legs. You thanked the Gods that you had shaved only a day beforehand. Making sure to keep eye contact with each of them for a few seconds, you stripped yourself of your clothes. Wonwoo kept stroking himself, feeling his cock get even harder as each piece of clothing landed on the floor. Mingyu wouldn't admit it to anyone, but he's had the biggest crush on you since you began working. And he's always admired the way you looked, even in work clothes. But seeing you like this, would be something he wouldn't forget for a very long time.

After you had stripped yourself of your clothes, you stood there only in your undergarments. You crossed your arms, feeling slightly self conscious in front of everyone.

"Can I touch her, Jeonghan?" Wonwoo asked suddenly.

"Yes, you can. You guys can do whatever you want with her, I know she'll enjoy it. Isn't that right, kitten?"

You gulped and hummed an approval, feeling like just a toy for them all to play with yet also a piece of art for them to worship. It made you feel a bit powerful also knowing that all of them were hard because of you and wanted to touch you, use you.

Wonwoo stood up, his cock against his stomach. You couldn't help but stare for a while, take note of the veins, length and his girth—which surprised you. "You like what you see, babygirl?" Wonwoo's voice sent a shiver up your spine and back down to your core. You crossed your legs, giving yourself a bit of friction between your thighs. He noticed and smirked, "Is that a yes?"

Wonwoo walked closer to you, intimidating you with his piercing eyes and dark stare. You nodded and he put his hand behind your neck, his mouth by your ear. "That's not an answer, sweetheart." His breath fanned your ear and neck, making you moan quietly. "She's easily flustered, yeah?" Wonwoo asked Jeonghan, yet still facing you.

"Oh yeah, definitely. Little kitten gets so shy whenever anyone does anything to her."

Wonwoo trailed his fingertip along your body, down your arm and down the front of your chest, creating goosebumps in its wake. "Is that so?"

"Wonwoo," you breathed out. "Please touch me." Your body was screaming and so was your pussy. You ached and wanted to be touched, badly. You weren't sure how much longer you could last without bursting.

"Needy, babygirl?" Wonwoo smirked and walked even closer to you that you could feel his hard-on pressing against your core.

You whined, slightly moving your hips to create more friction.

"Did your little pussy get wet from sucking off Jeonghan?" Before you could respond, Wonwoo's hand dipped between the two of you, between your thighs. His middle finger ran between your clothed folds, and he hummed. "You're soaked babygirl, you ruined your pretty underwear."

You whimpered at the feeling of Wonwoo's light touch, and also the way he talked to you—as if this wasn't his first time doing this with you. He seemed so natural and nonchalant about it all.

"You like it when your boyfriend watches other boys touch you?" His finger began rubbing you, stimulating your swollen clit. Wonwoo lowered his voice so only you were able to hear him, "Makes you feel like a slut, right?" Your eyebrows furrowed and you had to hold onto Wonwoo's shoulder. Lust clouded your mind and your knees grew weak, making him smirk at your reaction. "Go sit on the couch, babygirl."

You did, and it was then when you realized just how intently the other guys were looking at you. Mingyu's hair stuck to his forehead, Soonyoung's face was flushed and Jeonghan was, Jeonghan. All of the head of their cocks were red and you took a quick moment to admire the size difference, and girth difference. You were excited to say the least.

"Can you guys get on with it please? My boner is starting to hurt." Mingyu suddenly blurted out.

Wonwoo pushed you down on the couch, making you lay down. "Come join us then, little Gyu," he teased. Wonwoo's fingers hooked the band of your underwear and slowly pulled them down your legs.

"Fuck you." The latter retorted back while walking towards the both of you.

Wonwoo stood up, discarding your stained, damp underwear on the floor. "I mean, if you really want to." He got closer to Mingyu's face, challenging him.

Your clit throbbed at the scene. Wonwoo was more cocky and confident then you ever thought he was capable of, despite Mingyu having a couple inches on him. They both stared each other down, before Mingyu grabbed the side of Wonwoo's neck and slammed their lips together.

"Oh shit," You heard Soonyoung say on the side. Everyone's eyes widened as the two began making out roughly.

Gulping, you couldn't wait any longer and began touching yourself. You ran a finger up your folds, gathering your wetness and slowly inserting one inside of you. You bit your lip as you watched Mingyu and Wonwoo as best as you could before your eyes fluttered shut.

"Here, let me help you," a voice whispered next to you.

"Please," you mewled, whining, needing to cum soon.

Soonyoung grabbed your hips and turned you. He sat on the floor in front of your legs and lifted them over his shoulders. Without warning, Soonyoung's tongue entered you, making your back arch and cry out his name. He moaned against you, sending vibrations up your body. "Fuck angel, you taste so good." Soonyoung's tongue thrusted in and out of you, curling and poking. He sucked on your clit expertly and all you could do was spill out curses and chants of his name.

Wonwoo and Mingyu had stopped their harsh kissing once they heard you. Jeonghan, still sitting on the opposite couch, had his cock in his fist. He slowly stroked his length while watching how your face contorted and mouth open from how good Soonyoung ate you out. It turned him on to no end seeing all of them enjoy you so much. That was his girl.

Mingyu sat on the couch next to you and he couldn't help but smile darkly. You looked like a mess—a pretty mess, to him. He leaned in and kissed you, muffling your cries of pleasure. Mingyu sucked on your lower lip as a request of entrance and you accepted. His and your tongues rolled together in a way that had both of your heads spinning. You tried focusing on his tongue in your mouth but failed, only paying attention to Soonyoung's tongue in your heat.

Wonwoo felt left out and joined the three of you, sitting on the opposite side of you and beginning to massage your breasts through your bra. You moaned inside of Mingyu's mouth loudly, feeling Wonwoo's fingers slip into your bra and pinch your nipples.

"F-Fuck, I'm gonna cum." You gasped when you pulled away from Mingyu.

"Go ahead princess," Mingyu said, pausing, "let go." He whispered in your ear, sending a tingle down your back and throwing you off the edge. You came on Soonyoung's tongue with a shout that had your back arching off the couch and mouth dropping open.

Soonyoung looked up at you from between your legs. "Good girl." He gave you a kiss on your clit, making you jolt.

You laid on the couch, your core feeling numb and mind clouded.

"Hey," Mingyu said, bringing you out of your ecstasy filled trance. "Think you can help me out now?"

Giggling slightly, you nodded and stood up. "You want me to ride you, Mingyu?"

"Fuck yeah." He gasped, gripping your hips tightly and bringing you closer to him.

Fulfilling his wish, you held onto his shoulders and balanced yourself, getting ready to straddle him. He laid down on the couch and you climbed on top of him.

Mingyu moaned when you rubbed your folds against his cock. "Oh my god, t-that feels so good," he purred. He placed his arms behind his head, watching your movements on his dick. You and Mingyu's moans mixed together in harmony along with the sounds of how wet you were.

"You two look so good," Jeonghan teased, walking towards the couch.

You looked back at him, hips still moving. "Do we?" Humming, you smirked at him and gave him a look.

Jeonghan bent his knee, leaning into the couch while his other leg stood planted on the ground. He tugged your hair back, "Yes you do, kitten. Are you enjoying the boys?"

You gulped as you looked up at him. "I-I am," you replied.

He hummed in response and let go of your hair, letting his hand wrap around your throat. "Ride him now kitten, stop torturing him."

Mingyu smirked, looking at the scene unfold above him while you nodded and did as Jeonghan ordered. Jeonghan kept his hand around your throat as you grabbed Mingyu's length and lined it up at your entrance. You moved his head against your pussy, making the both of you moan. Finally, you sank onto Mingyu's cock while Jeonghan watched from behind you. Mingyu groaned at the feeling of your walls around him. "Y-You're so tight," he said breathlessly.

You whimpered, "You're so big." Your hips began moving against his slowly. Mingyu was big. Bigger than Jeonghan and definitely the thickest among the group.

"Yeah? Is my cock filling you up, princess?" You moaned at Mingyu's dirty words—you always loved it when Jeonghan talked like that, but hearing it from Mingyu's mouth turned you on even more. "You like that, don't you princess? I felt your little pussy clench around my dick when I said that."

"M-Mingyu," your loins felt like they were on fire. Mingyu's words were so lewd and uncensored—and you fucking loved it. You didn't want him to stop at any moment. Pleading, you gripped his shoulders tight—fingernails beginning to dig into his skin.

"What's wrong, princess?" Mingyu asked when you started whimpering over and over again.

Your walls hugged his cock, the sounds of you riding him present throughout the room. You felt Jeonghan's weight on the couch disappear and be replaced. A hand pushed your back down, making you hunch over Mingyu's chest. That same hand trailed up your neck and his finger slid into your mouth. You sucked on it, muffling your whines as it swirled around, gathering your saliva.

"Good girl," the voice whispered by your ear. Suddenly, that finger prodded at your hole, pulling a yelp out of you.

"Soonyoung," you gasped as his finger entered you and you halted your movements on Mingyu's cock.

He laughed slightly, "Jeonghan told me you don't mind this, is that right?" You turned to find your boyfriend sitting on the couch, his cock in his hand and a shit-eating grin on his face. As you were about to respond, Soonyoung thrusted his finger deeper in you, cutting off your sentence with a loud moan. "I said, is that right?"

You nodded, your mouth agape as Mingyu slowly fucked up into your pussy. "Oh my god," you breathed shakily. "Y-Yes, i-it's true." That ball in your stomach began to heat up, feeling Soonyoung's finger curl in you and Mingyu's cock hit the deepest parts of you and stretching you out in the most delicious way.

"You better not cum yet, princess." Mingyu growled from under you.

"Please," you begged. Soonyoung added another finger inside you, making you yell that you were sure the neighbor's would hear.

Whilst trying your best to hold back your orgasm, Mingyu snapped his hips up in you. You screamed and accidentally came around him. Your thighs and body shook as your hands desperately grasped onto Mingyu so that you didn't fall on top of him. Your eyes rolled back, pleasure overtaking every single vein in your body.

Mingyu tsked, "Bad princess." He suddenly spanked you and fucked into you again, not giving you anytime to come down from your high. You moaned loudly as Soonyoung smirked and began fucking your ass whilst Mingyu abused your walls.

You couldn't even process what was happening, your mind elsewhere while you were merely getting fucked in each holes. You couldn't speak at all, even if you tried only pathetic whines would come out. Jeonghan and Wonwoo cooed at you, enjoying your desperate cries as you were being overstimulated.

"She's okay, right?" Wonwoo whispered to the older male.

He nodded his head, "She's had worse done to her." Jeonghan winked at Wonwoo and they both turned their attention back towards you, touching themselves.

"What's wrong, angel? Can't handle being stuffed so much?" Soonyoung teased, making fun of you—not caring that you weren't prepared to cum again.

You felt another orgasm gearing up quickly and you warned the two.

Mingyu caught Soonyoung's eye and inaudibly told him to stop when he said so without your knowledge. When he felt your walls pulse around him a second time, he looked at Soonyoung. Before you were able to release, both of the men stopped. Soonyoung's fingers slipped out of you while Mingyu stilled.

"W-Why did you stop?" You whined. Neither of them answered. You turned around to see Soonyoung dripping lube from a small bottle onto his cock. Gulping, you mentally prepared for Soonyoung to fuck you from behind while Mingyu fucked your pussy. The thought of having both of their cocks in you at once had your head spinning.

"Ready, angel?" Soonyoung asked you, holding onto your shoulder with one hand while his other guided his length. When you nodded, he slowly but surely eased his cock inside of you. You winced at the feeling and told Soonyoung to wait.

Rather than feeling Soonyoung move, Mingyu began to slide his cock in your heat to distract you and help you relax. When Soonyoung thought you were okay enough, he pulled out of you almost all the way and slid back in a bit quicker. "God, you feel so fucking good." Soonyoung hissed. He grabbed your hips and began to fasten his pace. The three of you all moaned in sync, when Soonyoung pulled back, Mingyu thrusted his hips up into you.

"I'm close," Mingyu said, moans gradually getting higher. He sped up his thrusts as Soonyoung kept his pace.

You felt your orgasm quickly approaching once again, the pleasure mixed with the pain of being stretched out made it all too much for you. You couldn't remember the last time you had experienced such euphoria coursing through your body and you loved it; you wanted more and more. You threw your head back, shamelessly moaning out both of the men's names.

Mingyu bit his lip, as he pushed his head back into the couch. With a loud, long moan, he came inside you, triggering your own orgasm. The both of you came while Soonyoung slowed down slightly. Mingyu smirked as he pulled out of you and watched his cum began to seep out as well. He shuffled from under you, moving to stand next to Wonwoo and Jeonghan.

"My turn?" Wonwoo questioned.

"She's all yours," Jeonghan replied, moaning slightly as he stroked himself quicker.

Wonwoo smiled as he sprinted over to you and Soonyoung. "Hey babygirl, ready to give me a hand?" He said, bent over to look at you face to face.

You merely nodded, whining every time Soonyoung thrusted all the way inside of you. You turned your head and opened your mouth, waiting for Wonwoo's cock.

"Tongue out." He ordered, touching himself as he got closer to you.

With your tongue out—as told—you waited and closed your eyes, feeling Wonwoo's length finally make contact with your mouth. Wonwoo ran his fingers through your hair, pushing you further onto himself. He groaned lowly, biting his lip and watching you from above.

"Don't forget I'm here too, angel," Soonyoung said from behind you. He gripped your shoulder and held your hip, fastening his pace.

You moaned around Wonwoo before releasing him, "I-I don't think I'd be able to," you replied.

"Yeah? Does it feel good, angel?" Soonyoung licked his lips, feeling himself getting close.

You hummed before continuing to suck off Wonwoo. You took as much as you could, the tip of his cock brushing the back of your throat, making you gag slightly and pull off. A trail of saliva connecting your mouth to the head of his cock.

"You're so good at this, babygirl," he leaned in closer to your ear. "How many cocks you think have been in that slutty mouth of yours? Hm?"

Soonyoung hissed when he felt you clench around him, capturing Wonwoo's attention. "You like being degraded, babygirl?"

You looked up at him with an innocent look. Hell yes.

Wonwoo stroked your cheek, pulling a piece of loose hair behind your ear before grabbing your face. "You like being treated a bit rough, don't you?"

Gulping, you nodded. You cried out when you heard a loud smack and felt a sharp sting on your ass. You glanced behind you, seeing Soonyoung staring you down, his eyes the darkest they've ever been.

"I asked you a question," Wonwoo said in a serious tone. He made you look at him in the eyes.

"Y-Yes I do. I-I like being degraded a-and treated rough," you managed to get out, holding back your moans in between your words.

"Good girl," he petted your hair. "Now, you're gonna take Soonyoung like a good slut while you suck me off. Okay?" Wonwoo informed you, feigning a soft voice, despite having entire control over you.

"Okay," you breathed.

Wonwoo's mouth opened, signaling you to do the same. He slid his cock back inside of your mouth the second you followed his action. He bit his lip and pushed your head all the way onto his dick, holding you in place.

Your eyes squeezed shut, tears pricking the corners as you tried to relax your throat and breathe through your nose. You looked up at Wonwoo, making him laugh mercilessly. "What's the matter? Can't take all of my cock in that little mouth of yours?"

Your clit pulsed with pleasure, his words flipping your stomach and making your pussy wet with need.

Soonyoung's cock twitched inside of you, getting turned on by how slutty you really are for every one of them. He looked at what was happening in front of him, building his orgasm up quickly. "You look so pretty with your mouth stuffed, angel." He cooed.

Wonwoo finally released his grip on the back of your hair again, and you pulled back, gasping for air. You coughed slightly, spit dripping down the corner of your mouth and a teardrop rolling down your cheek. "Such a good whore for us, aren't you, babygirl?" He purred, wiping away your stray tear with his thumb.

You quivered, feeling your own orgasm beginning to approach. "I'm gonna cum soon," you shuddered.

"Me too," Soonyoung panted, his breath hitching in his throat as he began to fuck into you faster than before.

"S-Soonyoung, fuck!" You cried out, gripping the arm of the couch and letting your body fall onto the cushion.

He slipped his hand between your thighs and found your clit, rubbing it harshly.

A moan ripped out of you, your back arching. You whined over and over again, feeling overstimulated but at the same time desperate for your release.

"Come on," Soonyoung huffed. "Cum for me angel." He slipped two of his fingers inside of you and began curling them, scavenging for your sweet spot.

You began to cry from how overstimulated you were, the ball in your stomach unraveling all over the place. You came hard on Soonyoung's fingers, eventually squirting onto—not only his fingers, but the couch as well. You screamed as Soonyoung halted, cumming inside of you shortly after.

The three watching stood silently, mouths agape as they witnessed you squirt.

"I haven't seen her cum like that in a long time," Jeonghan rasped.

Soonyoung pulled his cock out of you, his cum dripping out and down the back of your leg.

You laid there, ass in the air and completely sensitive and worn out.

"Wonwoo, did you cum in her yet?" Mingyu asked suddenly.

"No, but, I think I'll give her a break." Wonwoo replied. "Maybe next time."

"Next time?" Jeonghan quirked his eyebrow. "You think I'm just gonna let you fuck my girlfriend again?" He said sternly.

"Well, I quite enjoyed my time here. I know they did and I'm certain she did as well. So, I'm only assuming we can make another arrangement sometime soon."

Jeonghan looked over towards you. You got up from the couch, limping to the group of men. "I would love to do this again. Please Jeonghan?" You cooed, pursing your bottom lip and holding onto his bicep.

He growled slightly, "Anything for my kitten." He kissed the top of your head. "Alright boys, you had your fun. Get your clothes and go, I gotta clean her up."

The other boys slightly cheered, happy there will be another time. They all took turns going in and out of your bathroom, cleaning up and pulling their clothes back on

Eventually, one by one, they all left you and Jeonghan's house, leaving the two of you to clean up.

...

Jeonghan ran a hot shower for both of you, allowing you to enter first. You moaned as the water hit your back.

"Have fun tonight, kitten?" Jeonghan asked, stepping in behind you.

You let out a soft "mhm," giving him a big grin.

"I'm glad, you were very good for all of them." He pulled you close to him, giving you a tight hug.

You giggled into his chest, "But Jeonghan, you didn't get to cum in me." You pouted.

Jeonghan chuckled, "Who said I wasn't going to?" He pushed you against the wall and grabbed your legs.

[thiswasinevitableid]

Study Buddies (Sternclay)

I got several requests for this prompt as a meet ugly for Sternclay: you caught me doing something a few weeks ago but didn’t report me and now you’re trying to blackmail me into secretly tutoring you even though you and your friends have always been assholes, no I don’t ‘owe’ you.” Fill is SFW

“I saw that.”

Stern freezes, hand still on the now-shut back door, “saw me putting out the garbage?”

“Nope” his coworker Barclay rumbles, “saw you taking the leftover pastries and giving them to the homeless guys who hang out in that plaza.”

“A few of them were from that batch you baked three hours ago, they were barely old, going to waste was ridiculous.”

“Yeah, but you know Haye’s rule about that.”

“Yes, and I think it’s ridiculous too.” He crosses his arms, staring up at Barclay and daring him to tell him it isn’t.

“I agree. But you still got caught.”

“By you, not by him, now move so I can start wiping down the tables.”

“What, uh, makes you think I’ll keep my mouth shut?”

Stern turns, startled, “are you trying to fucking blackmail me?”

“No, uh, I mean-” Barclay’s gaze darts to the front of the coffee shop, where his friends make several encouraging motions.

“Of course” he groans, “Christ, Barclay, I didn’t think you’d stoop this low.”

“Look” the larger man takes a step, bringing him into Stern’s space, “I have a massive midterm paper due in a few weeks, and I need help. Big time.”

From this distance Stern can smell laundry detergent and burnt sugar, see a pleading tint in those deep brown eyes. He wants to punch him in his aggravating, handsome face.

“You owe me, Stern.”

“Like hell I do.”

“I’ve covered your ass more times than I can count when you’ve run late because of your internship.”

“And I’ve covered your ass all those times you were late because you were giving your friends rides.” He jabs his finger into Barclay’s chest and his hand is instantly enclosed in one of Barclay’s own

“I don’t want to tell Hayes anything, Stern, but I really, really don’t want to fail this fucking class.”

“Fine. I’ll help with your essay.”

“Not just mine, my friends need help too.”

“Oh no, no chance, deals’ off.” Stern pulls his hand away, “I can tolerate you, but they” he points to the group still sitting at the table, “have been nothing but awful and rude to me”

“They’re not-”

“They are too that bad, at least to me.”

“No, that’s not what I meant. It wouldn’t be those guys, it’d be some friends of mine from the LGBT center on campus.”

“Fine. But if one of those ones shows their face, I leave. Shake on it.”

Barclay talks his hand again, shakes it, and tells him to be at the LGBT center at 7 p.m tomorrow. 

--------------------------

Stern arrives at five til, finds Barclay sitting on a beanbag chair near a low table with four other people. One, a blonde girl in a green dress, pops up and walks over to him. 

“Hi, can I help you?”

“I’m here for him.” He points to Barclay.

“Oh! You’re the essay guy.”

“Yep, that’s me.” He smiles as politely as he can muster and joins her at the table. 

“Glad you came.” Barclay smiles at him.

“I didn’t have a choice.” He glares and the smile disappears.

“Everyone, this is Stern-”

“Joseph. Most people call me Joseph.”

“-and he’s gonna help with the midterm essay for our comp class.”

“Sweet!” The other girl at the table, black hair streaked with red, raises her hands triumphantly. 

“Do all five of you need help?” Stern looks around.

“Nope, just me, Duck” she points to a stocky guy in a Yosemite’ shirt, “and Barclay. Indrid and this cutie aren’t in that class.” She kisses the blonde’s cheek. That makes Indrid the guy with messily dyed silver hair and sketchbook, who’s currently laying with his head in Duck’s lap.

“Alright, that’s not too bad. Does someone have the assignment?”

Duck pulls it up on his laptop so Stern can read it. 

“Okay, so, it’s time to start outlining how you want to approach your topic.”

“Uhhhh.” Barclay looks at this friends, who shake their heads.

“None of you have a topic yet.”

“Nope.”

“When is this due?”

“Three weeks from yesterday.”

“And it’s worth how much?”

“45% of our final grade.”

Stern allows himself a few moments of vicarious stress, then gets to work. By the time the center closes, they all have topics selected, and Stern has instructions to come back on Monday.

He does just that, comes back Wednesday too. By Friday, he’s learned that he and Duck actually share a chem lecture and that Aubrey has many classes in the same building he does, as she always waves to him when they cross paths. On Friday night, he arrives to help them flesh out their outlines. 

“Colors?” Aubrey says as she braids pieces of twine while studying her notes for her midterm. 

“What?”

“Your pride colors; I’m making bracelets for everyone because it helps me focus.”

“Oh, um, trans pride ones. Please.”

“Good, already got those out.” She slides a pink, blue, and white bracelet across the table to Duck.

Barclay arrives with cookies, and they settle into their usual working rhythm, Stern bouncing between the three to see what they have and offering editorial advice. He’s sitting shoulder to shoulder with Barclay, enjoying the contact more than he cares to admit. 

“This is a little clunky here, I think I see your point but it’s getting lost.”

Barclay taps the table, then deletes and re-writes the section. 

“That’s way better.”

“What can I say, got a good teacher.” Barclay smiles at him, subdued yet charming, and Stern’s heart flips several times before he whacks it into submission. 

A week later, he turns up at the center to find the room rearranged and a larger group present. There’s a screen hung up on the far wall and Dani is tinkering with a laptop and projector. 

“I think I missed a memo.” He says to Duck as the other man is pouring two cups of soda. 

“Yeah, we decided to have a movie night and watch Dracula’s Daughter because Aubrey insists it’s a gay classic.”

“It’s quite good. I’ll, um, I’ll just head out then.”

“Y’know you can stay right? You ain’t just essay help, you’re our friend.” Duck gives him a look stuck between reassurance and concern.

“I guess I can, since I have tonight blocked off.” He goes in search of a seat and finds the only free spot is, of course, directly next to Barclay. 

Dani dims the lights and the move starts. There’s a rustle near his lap.

“Popcorn?” Barclay whispers. 

“Sure, thanks.”

As the movie plays on, their hands keep going for popcorn at the same instant and bumping each other. A few weeks ago this would have annoyed him to no end. Now he just wants to hold his hand. Barclay is different around these friends; gentler, funnier, his generosity given plentiful outlets. He’s been different at work too, less inclined to needle Stern and more interested in talking with him as they clean than in enabling his friends to stay late and make a mess. Stern’s noticed said friends do their fair share of shit-talking Barclay, the larger man seemingly so used to it he doesn’t react. But more and more Stern sees the flashes of exhaustion and hurt on his face. 

“You're not their servant, Barclay.”

“I know, I’m just being helpful.”

“That was half your cut of the tips they scammed off you.”

“It’s fine, Stern.”

“But”

“It’s fine.”

The group opts to watch Frankenstein meets the Wolfman next, and Barclay adjusts so his hand is flat on the ground on the other side of Stern. Stern leans to the side, resting against him, and lets himself pretend he could feel this safe and wanted all the time. 

----------------------------------

“Stern, wait up!” Barclay catches up to him as he walks home. It’s Wednesday night, meaning everyone’s essays are finally finished. When Aubrey asked if Stern was going to keep hanging out with them, he said he’d have to see about his schedule, and ignored the fact she knew he was lying. 

“What was that line about your schedule? You could still make time to hang out with us.”

“I’ll come back when you all need help on your finals.”

“....do you seriously think that’s all we care about? All I care about? Stern, they really like you, and it seemed like you were getting along with everyone.”

“I was, and I do like them. But I can’t keep being around you.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” Barclay steps in front of him, barring his path. 

“It means that I like you too, but am well aware of how you really feel about me. You act kind, you talk to me like I actually matter, like we’re actually friends, but deep down I know you still think I’m uptight and nerdy and deserve to be mocked for it.”

“I don’t, I swear” Barclay puts his hands on Stern’s shoulders, voice earnest, “I like you a lot, I’m so fucking glad we started hanging out more, I, I really care about you.”

“Care about me? How the fuck am I supposed to believe that when you still won’t even call me by my name!” He hisses, not wanting to wake the nearby apartments. 

“I...I was just using it like a nickname. I didn’t know it bothered you. I’m, uh, I’m sorry.” He looks genuinely chagrined and the fire in Stern’s chest flickers out. He stares at the ground, not knowing what else to do.

“Joseph?”

He looks up in time to see Barclay bend forward, bringing their lips millimeters apart.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Do you” he exhales so intensely a nearby moth gets blown off course, “do you really want to?”

“Haven’t been able to think about anything else all night, babe. All week too.”

Stern closes the distance, Barclay’s hands gripping his arms when he does. The kiss is the sweetest thing he’s ever tasted and he lifts his hands up to Barclays cheeks, stroking them in a plea for more. 

Barclay obliges, slides his hands onto his back and pushes him forward, sighing soft and shaky when the kiss deepens. When it ends Stern stays put, rests his head on Barclay’s shoulder as he hugs him, shuddering with want.

“I gotcha babe, don’t worry.” Barclay pets his fingers through Sterns hair.

“Not worried your friends will see us?”

“Fuck ‘em. They were guys I knew in high school who knew how to manipulate me and I can do better. Like you, for starters. Plus Dani thinks their dicks too.”

“Knew there was a reason I liked her.”

“Now, if those friends saw us, we’d know because we’d hear Aubrey yelling ‘called it’ from a mile away.”

“Not that I’m opposed to sidewalk hugging, but it’s getting kind of cold.”

“C’mon” Barclay kisses his forehead, “let’s get you home.”

“Feel like joining me for some ‘coffee?’” Stern makes air quotes as Barclay takes his hand.

“Hell yeah I do. Can think of a lot of places I’d like to put cream.” 

“Not just yet, big guy, though I appreciate the enthusiasm.” Stern pauses his walking to kiss him, “tonight I think you and I have a make-out date on my couch.”

Another kiss, full of promise and the barest hint of heat, “sounds good to me, Joseph.”

[nightmare-chaser]

Living In Interesting Times

Could everything stop happening for a few minutes? 

There are riots on the street. They are in the right but they are being attacked and murdered, because in the power’s eyes there are no right riots. The police, those we are told swore to protect us from criminals, have in fact sworn no such thing. They wield power as a weapon against those minorities they cannot stand. They dress in disguises and start violence so they have a reason to attack the peaceful.

I saw a post where a black woman said she no longer allows people to say “They did that because you’re black,” and instead corrects them to “They did that because they’re bigots.” Before I had seen that post, it had not occurred to me the difference in wording, it had not occurred to me how the blame was shifted on the daily. There is something unflinching about the response, and while I am not being attacked, I flinch still. How had I not heard?

We have a facist in the white house, except the facist is too sensitive and thinks “facist” is a strong word. He tells us anti-fascist sentiments are treason, are terrorist ideas, as he puts families in cages and calls them illegal. The cages are filled with disinfectant, flooding the air and causing burns on the people, and somehow the people will not condemn it as gas chambers, because those should have died with Hitler. Those should have died with Hitler, not been dragged into the modern era out of spite for a condemnation of the poor conditions of the victims.

We have only a few months to get the fascist out of office, or else he stays for another four years. The fascist’s name is Donald Trump, and the idea that he would ever be president was so laughable that the simpsons made a gag over how terrible he would be. When he won the presidency, his campaign staff treated it like a funeral, for he did not want the job. Why did we give the job to a fascist who did not want it? We need him out. If we do not get him out, if we must live with him killing us for another four years, then we will have to live with him appointing two more justices to the supreme court, and he will continue to kill us for many, many more.

There is a country that is about to be extinct. It’s name is Yemen and I cannot point it out on a map. My geography, my history classes have failed me. It’s been in a civil war for six years and I did not hear a peep about it. I could not tell you it’s culture or it’s people or it’s language or it’s art, and it’s dying. It’s healthcare collapsed under the strain of the pandemic and the people are starving to death. An entire country is about to die, but I cannot even watch in horror because the news is silent on it.

Can we stop living in interesting times? I heard the Greeks used to wish interesting times on another as a curse, and I understand why. I live in helpless fear as things happen miles from me that I cannot effect. I live in fear as the things nearest to me are ruled by a powerful few. I do not know what tomorrow will bring, but it nearly certainly promises to be worse.

I am white. I am middle-classed. I do not fear for food or money, not right now. I am privileged and I am growing more aware of it by the day, and by the day I grow more ashamed of it. I did not make this system, but I profit from it with my mere existence and I do not know how to change it.

There was a black man shot dead by police in Atlanta, even though he was cooperative and polite. I do not know his name, and that is my own failing and a failing of the system. There was a black nurse shot dead in her own home by police, and her boyfriend is being charged for it. Her name is Breonna Taylor, but I do not know his name. There was a man named George whose last name I cannot spell whose neck was kneeled on by police until he suffocated. There are enough names of murdered black people to fill the back of a shirt in a dense paragraph of words, but I do not know them, and I do not know whether that is my personal failing or another of the system I find myself entangled in.

I learned in sociology class that society is more than the sum of it’s parts. I learned that even though we are all gears in society, society is also it’s own separate living organism. I did not understand it then, not fully. I understand it now, as I watch movements be born and gather members and fight to kill the rotten parts, as I watch things stay nearly the same anyway. Society has become a dragon to be defeated, but our knight is sickly or missing. The teeth are batons, it breathes tear gas, and it roars lies and “fake news” as it eats us alive.

There is a pandemic occurring, but the restrictions on movement and gatherings are being lifted. I wear a face mask to work to protect the customers from myself, hyperaware of how the customers do not care to protect me and will not cover their faces. Recovering from COVID-19 can leave you with conditions that you did not have before, ravaging your lungs and body until they never work quite right again. My grandmother texts me to complain that we should open faster and I’m struggling to explain to her why we cannot. The morgues in New York needed refrigerated trucks to hold the corpses in, and now we’re opening for the second wave. We did not flatten the curve, not enough. We are not prepared to open, but the facist leading us says we are and lies to our faces. 

The fascist ordered teargas and swat teams used to remove peaceful protestors from in front of a church so he could have a photograph without them ruining it. He promised us a racist and xenophobic wall built on our border, and instead built it around the white house to protect himself. He removed the qualified specialists from their positions and replaced them with bigots, then worked to make listening to specialists a political opinion instead of common sense. 

I am queer. There has been talk of how to remove gay marriage. It died quickly, at least I hope that’s what the silence means, but it existed. Poland is close to electing a leader who will outlaw queer ideaology in public places, as though love is an ideaology and not intrinsic to our being.

Is there any way we can skip this part? I’m tired and I’m scared. I’m ready for it to be tomorrow. The police defunded and public services grown, the pandemic gone and us healed, systematic racism dismantled and fascism erased. I wish I could wake up tomorrow and we’d’ve fixed everything.

That’s too simplistic. The riots have to happen. The protests, the petitions, the struggle. The deaths, the outrage, the fear. We must live through all of this if we wish to see that tomorrow, or else tomorrow is just another day to die in silence.

I am scared, though, and I am tired.

I am not doing anything. I do not know what to do. I do not know where the protests are, or when they are organized, and I do not know how to safely find out. I have no emergency contact I trust enough to tell if I go to a protest, and I am too scared to go without. I do not know how to protest, how to safely engage.

I am in college and I cannot imagine my future. I am told repeatedly that I need to decide, that every day gone is a day wasted. I am told repeatedly that I need to act, to take life by the horns and make something of myself. I am given resources to do so, but how can I? The world is going up in flames and I’m expected to choose a major and a career.

Society does not care for me. I am one more gear in it’s machine. I am one for snack for the dragon to eat. My mother tried to get me to ask for a raise at my job and did not understand that corporations do not value employees. I work minimum wage and I am disposable to the higher ups. The virus gave us extra business and I broke down crying from the stress twice. My coworkers have also cried and it is not a surprise. The corporations use us as gears and use us until we break, then they replace us with a newer model. Unions are still the bad guy in all the gossip. Our nation has a history of union busting that I am forcibly reminded of often.

The world is ending, somehow, someway. I cannot tell if what is dying is a free world, or a cage. I cannot tell if tomorrow will come with the dawn of a new golden age, or if we will all be silenced and in chains. We are living through history, and the generations after us are watching us now, and I do not know what they see. The victor will always write themself as the hero, and I don’t know what hero that distant future sees.

I saw a post by a school counselor. She said the teenagers are depressed. She said young people used to dream big, dream of being astronauts or movie stars or changing the world in a significant way. She said the teenagers of today are hesitant to say they might own a house. They are afraid to set even the lowest bar.

I should be doing more. The world is falling down around our ears, but I do nothing. The people scream in defiance and I whisper. I am afraid and I am helpless. I used to dream of being famous, when I was small. Today, I am scared of the future, and I feel small.

I spread the awareness posts to my few followers. I sign the petitions. I give donations, fives and tens to the various organizations. I play on the internet and try to forget the world outside of my room, just for a bit. The days fall through my hands like water, unused and wasted. It feels like dying.

I survive. I click another link. I watch a world die.

[doc-pickles]

it’s nothing funny just to talk (p. 1)

What happens when you text that random number graffitied on a bathroom stall in your favorite bar? Jo Wilson is about to find out. - In which Bar Princess and Doctor Evil Spawn meet via text.

More Jolex on your timeline because y’all seemed to love what I posted before! Also I’ve posted this whole piece on AO3 as well so it might look familiar.  

this idea came to me in a fever dream and i am not sorry that y'all have to deal with it. 99% of this fic will be in "texting" format, so be prepared for that. 

Jo is regular Alex is italics

Saturday 11:04 PM

heeeeey is thiss doctor evil?

I gotta say ur phone sex namee needs sum weerk

u soud like a comic book village 

fuck

village

VILLAIN

Who the hell is this? And how did you get my number? 

i’m just a girl at thee bar!!!! 

Joe’s Bar?

noooooo

i’m at enerlad city bar

You didn’t answer my question. 

u asked a quesitoon?

whata was it?

i’m goos at takifjg tests 

How’d you get my number?

it qas in the bathrooom!!!

it said “for a good tiem txt dr evil spawne” 

so I did

I am ready to havee fun

You’re drunk, obviously, and I’m going to have to kill Cristina for putting my number up. 

ooooooh is thatt ur girleifnd?

hirlefiend 

girlfriend**

Wow you’re really gone. And hell no, she’s my roommate. One of them. 

ooooh how many do u hav

roomees not girlfriends 

Three. Two girls and a dude. 

intereeesting...

well it’s tome for fireball shoots

steph is yeeling at me 4 txting too much

goodbey doctor eviel apawn!!

Oh lord. Tell Steph you need water. Or an IV. 

I’ve got her. she’s throwing up on her shoes. thanks doctor. - steph

  Sunday 10:11 AM

You know you’re pretty funny, Bar Girl. 

jesus christ what fucking time is it?! 

10 AM

I’m assuming you have a massive hangover. 

hold on I can’t hear you over the sound of me vomiting

TMI as the kids say these days. 

what’re you a grandpa or something?? 

No I just don’t know how to use text lingo. Except WTF. I know that one very well. 

quick question

who the fuck are you?

Dr. Evil Spawn. You found my name graffitied in the bathroom of Emerald City Bar. 

holy shit

I thought I dreamed that... WHAT THE FUCK

Nope. I’m real. 

holy shit i’m so sorry

my texts were so annoying

Who hurt you? I mean you were shitfaced, I’m assuming someone broke your heart into tiny pieces. 

the opposite actually, I was at a bachelorette party

not mine, i’m so single it hurts

Ahhh that makes sense. So you got shitfaced in solidarity? 

exactly you get it

you seem like you’d be the DD at a bachelorette party

Well seeing as I’m a dude I don’t do Bachelorette parties. 

Well I did go to one, but that’s a different story.  

hmmm you seem like a very interesting man doctor evil spawn 

going to bachelorette parties, living with women who aren’t your girlfriend 

OMG ARE YOU DATING THE GUY YOU LIVE WITH?!

George? No absolutely not. And before you ask, my other girl roommate is gay. 

so you’re single?

i’m only asking so when you murder me the police have as much information as possible

Haha very funny. I would be a terrible murderer. 

you didn’t answer my question

Fine. Yes I’m single. 

i’ll note that in the “serial killer file” i’m building 

gotta go, I have to do work :/

Have fun, don’t die. 

  Sunday 8:38 PM

Arizona is trying to set me up on a blind date. 

who’s arizona?

My gay roommate. She wants me to meet this “bubbly blonde” she knows from her pilates class. 

ahhhh. why don’t you go?

Bubbly blonde is not my type. Sounds like she’ll spend the whole date talking about how much she loves dogs or her knitting hobby. 

Plus she does pilates, that tells me more than enough. 

you’re making some good points. I don’t pity you. 

You better not. How was work?

the longest day of my life

it was just paperwork, I don’t actually work on the weekends

What do you do?

hmmmm that’s exactly what a serial killer would say

i’m an elementary school teacher

Oh so you sing and dance and paint pictures all day?

what school did you go to?

were working on multiplication tables and basic photosynthesis tomorrow

Wow that sounds like a lot.

it’s may, ive got three weeks of school left so I have to cram all the crap we didn’t cover into these last few weeks 

Ahhh that sounds more accurate.

and what do you do? 

besides text strangers that you don’t know

I’m a pediatrician. 

oh so you make kids cry and wipe snotty noses all day? two can play at that game

Well we both have to deal with snotty noses sooo...

I GET IT!! Doctor Evil Spawn!! 

why evil spawn though? 

I wasn’t this nice when I started med school. My personality is an acquired taste. 

ha! that’s a funny joke. 

so if you’re a fancy schmancy doctor why do you live with three other people?

I’m only a resident, not making the big bucks yet. Everyone else is a doctor too. 

are they all pediatricians?

No. Arizona is too but Cristina is a cardiologist and George is a trauma specialist. 

interesting!! I too live with my coworkers. it’s not fun. 

the table is always covered in craft supplies. 

Well I can never read the grocery list on the fridge. Stupid doctors script...

oh that’s a classic. you’re pretty funny Dr. Evil Spawn

Thanks Bar Girl. 

I gotta go. monday tomorrow and you know how fourth graders can be. night!! 

Night . 

  Monday 9:47 AM

there’s not enough coffee in the world for monday mornings. 

  Monday 10:52 AM 

Sorry I was yelling at the interns. We have a decent coffee cart here. Keeps me alive. Are you texting in class?

no it was recess

now they’re at spanish class

i’m not totally irresponsible 

Oh good to know the future of America is in good hands. Teacher Princess is “not totally irresponsible”

teacher princess?

Well, Cinderella lost her shoe, you puked on yours. Same thing. 

wooooooooow

that was so uncalled for...

I thought it was funny. Gotta go set a broken arm. 

broken arm vs. adverbs... can we switch? have fun lol

  Monday 3:26 PM

I don’t even think I know what an adverb is. 

how did you become a doctor??

Don’t need to know adverbs to fix a couple broken bones and snuffy noses. 

oh darn I should’ve gone to school for seven more years then

Haha. How were the adverbs?

better than expected, grading papers while I wait for my roomies to be done

we carpool, saving the environment and shit

Okay Eco Warrior.

you text like a 60 year old man

you’re not a 60 year old man are you?

No I’m a 28 year old man though

28 a doctor and you’re single? your personality must be worse than you described 

I’m a busy man, I don’t have time to settle down. And I have no desire to. 

yet you have time to text a complete stranger? 

hmmmm interesting...

Ouch, that one hurt Princess. 

steph is making me socialize with the other teachers

if I don’t respond, they killed me or dragged me to an essential oil party

Hahahaha

  Monday 5:18 PM

Did you get roped into a pyramid scheme?

nooo but therew as wine

I should sotp drunk texting you so often 

It makes your presence that much more entertaining. And bearable. 

woah woah dude

i’m a gem 

I can tell. Elementary school teacher with a heart of gold. 

awwww your too sweet tome

It’s a Monday. Who the hell gets drunk on a Monday?

teachers

we deserve it

You’re a teacher and you’re single and still going to Bachelorette parties. You’re what, 23? 

i’m 25 and i’m doing greta thanks you very nuch 

cnat believe that i’m supplying my perosnal info to a serial killer

What makes you so sure that I’m a mass murderer? 

ur weird nickname and ur intimate knowledge of the himan body

Mmm yes well a good amount of women do find themselves screaming around me often. Or under me. On top of me...

omg are you sending me dirty jokes

you’re crazy 

What can I say. 

Gotta go, I’m on call tonight. Get to bed safe, Bar Princess. 

mmmkay thanks Doc

  Wednesday 11:29 AM

What do you think is worse: School lunch or hospital food?

hospital food, no doubt

thursday is mac and cheese day here... I could bathe in that stuff

We have Spaghetti Wednesday but that’s the only good thing here. 

mmm how depressing

the teachers do a pot luck once a month and that’s always good

the art teacher next door to me makes the BEST blueberry muffins. 

Lucky. All I get here is vending machine cookies. Anything interesting happening in the elementary world? 

a first grader got lice last week so naturally we all have it now

I had to chop off six inches of my hair

Holy crap. Lice can be vicious, be thankful you didn’t have to shave your head. 

it feels like I did, my hair hasn’t been above my shoulders since the backstreet boys were still touring

Wow. I’m glad to know you’re well cultured. 

of course I am

gotta go, kids are back from music class

Don’t be too hard on them, they deserve a break every once in awhile. 

  Thursday 3:06 PM

Incoming Voice Call

“Jenna you forgot your lunch pail. Have a good day!”

“Hello?”

“Hi Mrs. Peters. I didn’t grade Henry’s test yet, I’ll have it tomorrow. Thanks bye!”

“Helloooo?”

“Steph I gotta grab my things, I’ll be there in a seco- oh shit. Hello?”

“Bar Princess?”

“Doctor Evil Spawn? I must’ve butt dialed you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay I... I don’t mind the interruption. Are you leaving work?”

“Just about, we’re wrapping up the solar system and I have to bring home the diorama.”

“I was never good at the models, I prefer working with the real thing.”

“Oh ho, a man that works with his hands. I can appreciate that.”

“You know now we’re officially talking and we still don’t know each other’s names.”

“Well around here I’m Miss Wilson, but you can call me Jo.”

“Jo. Hmm I like chicks with dudes names. I’m Dr. Karev but you can call me Alex.”

“Well nice to kinda meet you Alex. I’ll talk to you soon, I gotta get out of here.”

“Talk to you later.”  

  Thursday 4:34 PM

I wouldn’t mind if you were my teacher.

how did I know you’d send me something along those lines

I’m predictable. I’m still calling you Bar Princess. 

as you wish doctor evil spawn

I get to assist on a surgery today. Tonsillectomy. 

like removing tonsils? that’s awesome

for you, not for the kid

Oh she’ll be fine, she gets ice cream and jello for a week.  

okay yeah I might be jealous of her now

id love to be off work for a week and have you waiting on me hand and foot

the ice cream is a nice bonus

You think that’s my job?

well you said you aren’t making the big bucks yet so.... yeah 

Keep dreaming. I’ll talk to you later, gotta scrub in. 

have fun!!!!

[eddiesasspbrak]

Forever and Always Ch. 7

Eddie is the only one of his friends to stay behind in Derry after high school, causing him to lose touch with some of them. Now 24, Eddie has heard rumors that his now famous, former best friend (aka love of his life) may be coming back to town. That won’t be too awkward, right?

Ch.1

Ch. 8

Read on AO3

2k+ words

Wednesday Richie had a video conference with his manager and some producer. He also needed to help bring his dad home and get situated. He’d told Eddie the night before that he may not be available to see him at all that day. Eddie had to work all day anyway, but he was still sad about having to miss even one day with him. Neither knew what would happen in a week when Richie was gone again.

With the store empty, Eddie had time to really think things over as he sat on top of his stool and leaned heavily against the countertop. He knew that he wanted to be with Richie. He’d known it for a long time. Now that he knew Richie wanted him back and they were together, could he really just let it all slip away again? Part of him thought he’d start packing that evening and look for jobs and apartments online in New York. He had a decent enough savings that he could swing the first and last months rent on a very tiny studio apartment. There was the option of staying with Richie or Ben and Bev while he looked for a place he could manage. He would work all day and then go to Richie’s shows in the evening. They get dinner and drinks with Beverly and Ben and have date night at least once a week.

The fantasy was just starting to convince him he could make it all a reality when his mother’s voice filled his head. “You can’t leave me Eddie! What if I get sick again? Who will take care of me if you’re not here?  New York is so dangerous! You could be mugged or bitten by a rat on the subway and die in a hospital bed wishing you’d listened to me.”

Then there was her reaction to his sexuality to worry about. If he told her he was leaving to be with his boyfriend she would go into shock. If she found out that his boyfriend was Richie Tozier, she was likely to go into cardiac arrest. She still didn’t know that he had any contact with him since being back in town. He’d told her that he’d been at the library and was too tired to eat when he returned as he’d already eaten with Richie. The lies were piling up, but he didn’t feel like he had a choice.

It seemed the easiest thing to do would be to disappear in the middle of the night with a note left on the table. He knew he couldn’t do that to her though. It might actually kill her and that’s not what he wanted. He just wanted to be in New York with Richie, making up for the mistake he’d made six years ago.

Eddie was distracted with his inner turmoil and didn’t notice when Gerard arrived. He didn’t hear the bell above the door jingle and he definitely didn’t hear Gerard sneaking up behind him. When he felt something press into his back, he startled and whirled around on the stool when he heard Gerard, in a deep voice, say, “Empty the register.”

Eddie slapped his hand away while Gerard laughed at his own joke. He hadn’t even realized how late it had gotten while he was staring into space thinking about all of his life choices.

“Couldn’t resist trying to scare you since you were so out of it.” Gerard giggled. “What’s going on with you?”

“I’m trying to make an important life decision that could completely alter my future.”

Gerard set his bag on the floor and dropped onto his own stool. “Damn, you pregnant or something?”

“Yes Gerard. I’m pregnant and it’s yours.”

“Hell yea that would be one cute kid.”

“I cannot talk to you.” Eddie turned his back on Gerard, only to have him pull his stool up next to him so he couldn’t avoid him.

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to cheer you up. What’s going on?”

Eddie sighed and wondered if he could tell Gerard everything. He’d never betrayed his trust before, so why shouldn’t he? He didn’t have a lot of people to confide in and he knew what all of their friends would say if he went to them. They’d all tried to encourage him to leave multiple times. He needed someone else’s opinion.

“To explain I have to give a bit of backstory.” Gerard nodded and stayed silent, so Eddie continued. “When we were seventeen, I made out with Richie on the kissing bridge except I was drunk and forgot all about it. Since I acted like it never happened, Richie thought I was rejecting him.”

“Shit.”

“Then when he was leaving Derry to move to New York, he asked me to come with him. I didn’t go because I didn’t think my mom could survive without me. I was also worried that I’d have to watch him fall in love and end up alone there because I didn’t know how he felt.”

“Do you know how he feels now?”

“Yea. He loves me and has since we were kids. I’ve been in love with him just as long and I feel so stupid for letting so much time slip away from us.”

“Fuck. I knew you loved him as like a fan, but I didn’t know you were in love with him. Sorry I keep having sex dreams about your man.”

“He’s leaving in a week. Maybe sooner. He has to go back to New York and get back to work. He wants me to go with him and I’m eighteen again standing on the side of the road, watching him drive away. Only this time I can fix it and get in the car with him, but the same dilemma remains.”

“Your mom?”

“Exactly.”

“And she still doesn’t know you’re gay?”

“No. She doesn’t even know I’m in touch with Richie. She’s always hated him, so I lied about reconnecting with him. I keep lying to stop that lie from being uncovered and now if I make the choice to go, I have to admit to it all. Which will just make everything worse and more complicated.”

Both fell silent as Gerard took it all in and thought it over. He didn’t know what to tell him. He was sixteen and didn’t have any real-world experience yet. He thought that if it were him, he would have gone the first time. But he also could see why Eddie made the choice he did. There was just one problem…

“You made the choice not to go with Richie because you were eighteen and scared. You’re not eighteen anymore Eddie. You know what life is like if you say no and stay in Derry. Do you want to continue driving an hour outside of town just to go to a bar that will accept you? Do you want to have drunk one-night stands with random guys instead of waking up next to the man you love? Do you want to spend the rest of your life working in this shitty little convenience store, complaining to your next teenage coworker about how you’re 35 and still living with your manipulative mother who doesn’t even know the truth about you?”

“Ok, ok. I get it. I know you’re right. Of course, I want to go with him. I just, I need to think about it seriously. About what it would mean to go and what it would mean to stay.”

“If you stay, I’m never speaking to you again.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“No, I don’t. But I will forever think of you as the stupidest man I ever met in my life.”

Eddie still had a lot to think about but hearing Gerard voice the words that had been rattling around in his head all day was sobering. He knew that the first step was sitting down and telling his mom everything. Just…not yet. He had to think about what he was going to say and what he’d do if she reacted the way he expected. Having Richie on standby was probably the best bet in case she tried to lock him away in his bedroom. He could rescue him like the princes in the tower and would enjoy every second of it. He spent much of their teen years climbing in through Eddie’s bedroom window anyway, so he knew how to go about it.

Gerard and Eddie had to finish their conversation when a customer walked in. He didn’t want to broadcast to anyone else in the town that he was gay and thinking about leaving Derry. He just knew that it would get back to his mother somehow and that’s not how he intended for her to find out. The rest of his shift went fairly smoothly after that. It picked up a bit the closer it got to 5pm with people running out to get last minute ingredients for dinner. He and Gerard closed up and went their separate ways around 6:30.

Eddie spent his walk home imagining what it would be like to tell his mom as soon as he got home that he was leaving Derry to move to New York with his boyfriend Richie. He could practically see her head combusting. He needed a way to break it to her softly, but he didn’t know the right way. Maybe if he presented her with a plane ticket to New York first it would go a little easier. Like she’d ever get on a plane.

“I’m home.” He called as he walked in the front door.

His mother came from the kitchen, looking annoyed already. “Good. I’m making dinner and I expect you’ll be here to eat it tonight. You’ve left me alone for the past two nights.”

“Er…yea. Sorry. I’ll be here. I’m gonna go clean up first.” Eddie said, kicking off his shoes and dashing up the stairs.

He swapped out the white polo he’d worn to work for a more comfortable t-shirt and jeans for some sweats. His mother wouldn’t approve but he didn’t care. He was in the bathroom washing his hands when his phone began to ring in his bedroom. Quickly drying his hands, he rushed back down the hall to grab it before they hung up. His heart skipped a beat when he read the caller ID. Richie.

“Hello?” Eddie answered the phone, dropping onto his back on his bed.

“Good evening Spaghetti. Are you home yet?”

“Yea I got home a few minutes ago. Is your dad situated at home?”

“He’s resting comfortably in his lounger. Hey, have you eaten yet?”

“No. My mom is cooking. Why?”

“I was just thinking that I miss you and wanted to see if you’d like to go out.”

“Absolutely. Yes. 100%.” Eddie said with a wide grin. “Too eager?”

“Just eager enough. And the answer I was hoping for. I’m on your porch.”

Eddie sat up quickly and looked toward the hallway. “You haven’t knocked or rang the doorbell, have you?”

“No not yet.”

“Don’t. Please. My mom can’t know you’re here. Just…go back to your car and drive to the end of the block. I’ll meet you there in a second.”

Richie was silent for a second. “I’m starting to think you’re ashamed of me Eds.” He laughed but it was more nervous than humorous.

“I’m not. I swear. I just…I’ll explain in the car, ok?”

“Yea. Ok.”

Eddie hung up and rushed to put his jeans back on. At the bottom of the stairs, he sat to slip his shoes back on. Hearing him running down the stairs, his mom came into the hallway in time to see him standing and heading to the door.

“Eddie!” She called out to him. “Where are you going? You said you’d have dinner with me.”

“I’m sorry, ma. There’s an emergency.”

“What kind of emergency?”

“It’s, uh…Gerard. He needs my help with…his grandmother. She’s staying with them and can’t get out of the tub. I’m going to help lift her out. I shouldn’t be too long. Maybe an hour. Or two.”

“Two hours to lift an old woman out of the tub?”

“Well, yea. I have to make sure she’s ok and he might need other help just getting her situated. I’ll text you.”

“But, Eddie!”

He left then, closing the door behind him so she couldn’t see which way he was running in the dark. He heard the door open behind him, but Richie had parked far enough down that she wouldn’t be able to see him getting into the car. Richie eyed him as he slid into the passenger’s seat of his parent’s car and looked out the rear window toward his house.

“Running from the police?” Richie asked.

“Or something.”

Richie pulled away from the curb as Eddie buckled his seat belt. “I figured we’d go somewhere outside of Derry if that’s alright. It’s a longer drive but plenty of time for you to explain why you had to sneak away.”

“Outside of Derry is probably a good idea. My mom doesn’t exactly know that I’m going out with you.”

“Yea I figured since I had to park a block away. You couldn’t have just told her we were hanging out as friends?”

“Well…she doesn’t exactly know that I’m in contact with you…at all.”

“Oh.”

“She’s not your biggest fan you know…”

“Yea it’s been rough since the breakup.”

“Choosing to ignore you. And when she initially asked me, I didn’t think I was going to be seeing you. It was before we talked about things the first time. I haven’t told her yet because things are complicated, and she’ll ask me why I’m spending so much time with you. I just feel like it will end up coming out that I’m gay and I’m not ready for her to know that. I don’t know how she’ll respond or what she’ll do to me.”

“It’s fine Eds. I understand.” Richie reached across the center console to grab Eddie’s hand in the dark space between them. “I know she’s bad when it comes to you but what do you think she’d do if you told her?”

“Lock me in my room until I agreed to marry a woman. Hire a hitman to kill you. Break my legs and tie me to the bed like in Misery. Who knows? Maybe all of the above.”

“So, what your saying is, I should just keep driving and hide you away in my apartment?”

Eddie smiled and turned his head to look at Richie. “I’m pretty sure she has a tracker on me somewhere. She was always so afraid I’d be kidnapped I wouldn’t put it past her. They put those things in dogs and cats, they can probably put them in humans too, right?”

“Worth a shot. If she shows up at my place, we’ll just say you went on an impromptu vacation.”

“Cause that will go over well.”

Richie fell silent as he squeezed Eddie’s fingers. “I just don’t want to let you go again.”

“I know. I don’t either. I’ve already decided to tell her everything. I just need to figure out how to do it, so she won’t freak out.”

“Maybe call a swat team to hide behind for when she hulks out.”

“Not the worst plan you’ve had.” Eddie sighed. “I want to tell her. I really do. I’m sick of hiding who I am, and I don’t want you to think I’m ashamed of you. Because I’m not.”

“I would never think that. You’re lucky to have scored a hot piece of ass like me.”

Eddie rolled his eyes. “You mean you’re the lucky one because I actually like your unfunny ass.” He laughed.

“I’m about to get sappy as fuck because you’re damn right I’m the lucky one. I could barely sleep last night knowing I probably wouldn’t see you today. I got yelled at a handful of times during my video conference because I kept getting distracted just thinking about you. I was at your door before I could even think about it. Fuck, Eds, I love you more than I ever thought possible.”

Eddie chewed his bottom lip, trying to keep emotion from welling up but it was a losing battle. Some part of him knew that his mother loved him deep down under all the instability. He knew that his friends loved him in a familial way. But he’d never felt loved like this. Loved so completely for who he is. Loved by someone that he loved more than anyone else. In an instant, he hated his mother. Hated her for keeping his leash around his neck for years. Making him too afraid of being honest with her and too afraid to leave her. Drilling these compulsions into him with years of fake medication and fears of the outside world. If she’d had it her way, he would never have left their house for even a second his entire life.

“I want to go with you Richie. To New York. And I’m going to tell her everything. That I’m gay, that I’ve been dating you and that I’m leaving to be with you. I promise. As soon as I figure out how, I’ll tell her. Just give me time. Ok?”

Eddie felt a tear slip down his face but luckily Richie couldn’t see it as he kept his eyes on the road. His grip on Eddie’s hand tightened as he brought it to his lips and pressed a firm kiss to the back of it. “Tell me what you need me to do to help. Promise me you won’t let her guilt you into anything.”

“I promise.” Eddie turned his gaze to the road speeding by through the windshield. “I won’t let her manipulation keep us apart ever again.”

[oryu404]

Hopeless Valentine

[Link to AO3] Rogue swore on the name of every God he could think of that this was going to be the last time he’d ever take Yukino’s advice. She meant well, he’d never doubted that, but there were some things he was sure to be better off if he’d figure them out on his own. His love life was at the top of that list.

He supposed he should’ve seen it coming. All of their friends were either married, engaged, or expecting a baby. In short, they were all in serious relationships even though none of them had reached their thirties yet. He and Yukino had been the only ones left and they were fine with that. They even spent most Valentine's days together watching those sappy romance movies, armed with alcohol and snacks, laughing when the plot Rogue had predicted 5 minutes into the movie came true.

Silly, cliché, and totally unrealistic. Romance in real life was nothing like that.

He knew it was all going to change when he hung out with her one day. He could read it off her expression even before she had spoken the words. She had met someone. A young woman, tall, dark and gorgeous, who could perform magic in the kitchen, among other places. It was serious, and he’d been more than happy for her, of course he had, but now he had become that one friend.

The one with the dating history more tragic than the sinking of the Titanic. The only one who always showed up without a plus one, forever alone Rogue, and as he’d already feared his best friend was having none of it.

He tried to assure her that it was fine, joking that he’d just become the male equivalent of the crazy cat lady, but she shushed him and started a speech about how everyone deserved to find true love and that his was out there somewhere. He’d just have to find him, and the look on her face told him she’d made it her mission to make sure that he did.

He had reluctantly taken every single piece of advice from her so far, from letting her give him a makeover, to accompanying her and Minerva to the local gay bar and even getting a tinder profile. And every outcome had been a failure that exceeded the previous one.

After hours of shopping and trying out clothes that he didn’t feel comfortable in, he was finally able to convince her that his so-called “true love” would also accept him in a pair of nerdy glasses and a Star Wars hoodie. The obnoxious, loud pop music, the mixed scents of sweat, alcohol, and an overkill of body spray, and the lack of movement space caused by complete strangers brushing and grinding up against him were an instant reminder why he’d never been a fan of clubbing. And even Yukino had to admit that Tinder was a bad idea when he showed her the messages -and not to mention the pictures- he had received unsolicited.

Still, she had been able to talk him into what she’d sworn would be fun, and if it wasn’t there’d be no strings attached. The only reason he’d agreed on going speed-dating on Valentine’s Day was because she’d promised to get off his case after this. Besides, it wasn’t like he had something better to do anyway. He’d only have to spend about 10 minutes with each candidate, and he could just voice his opinion about them on the scorecard he was given. How bad could it be?

Bad was an understatement.

Out of all the guys that had taken place in the seat across him there hadn’t been a single one that made him lament the moment when the bell rang, signaling the encounter had ended. There’d been a man who must have been more than twice his age, one who was only interested in his cell phone, one who was so full of himself it surprised Rogue he still had room for the breadsticks, one who was actually in a relationship, just looking for “a playmate to spice things up a little,” and one who spent the full ten minutes undressing him with his eyes and wasn’t too subtle about his intentions during their conversation either.

Rogue was more than relieved when he was saved by the bell from that last one. He put on a forced and obviously faked smile when the guy got up and slipped him a piece of paper, winking as he mouthed the words “call me,” and moved on to the next table.

‘Don’t hold your breath.’

With a frown, Rogue turned to his scorecard, reviewing all the ranks he had assigned to his dates until now.

How interested would you be in a second date?

1: I can’t wait!

2: Willing to give it a chance

3: Maybe

4: Not my type

He added a fifth 4 to his list, scratching it into the paper as big and bold as he could without puncturing through it. He wanted to make sure there was no mistaking what his answer to this one was.

It dawned on him that there was only one more possible match left, and that made him both relieved and disappointed. Not that he’d had high expectations for tonight, he just thought it would be nice to have a click with someone again. His last relationship had ended years ago, and although he’d tried it a few times in college, one night stands weren’t really his cup of tea. Was he really that picky? Unlucky, perhaps? Or maybe this whole dating and romance thing just wasn’t meant for him?

“Hey, good evening!”

Rogue snapped out of his thoughts when his last date sat down, the number 8 was written on his tag. He looked…promising? At least he seemed to be well within an age range Rogue would say was acceptable. At first glance, he came off as friendly, and he wasn’t that hard on the eyes either. So far, so good.

“Hey, uhm…nice to meet you, I guess?”

I guess? Very smooth.

“Same! I gotta tell you, I’m not that good at small talk, but-“ the guy held up his finger to excuse himself and sneezed into a napkin, “sorry…”

“Bless you. And no problem.”

“So I’m not that good at small talk and I’m just going to be very unoriginal and ask you how you’d describe the perfect date?”

Very unoriginal indeed, Rogue had to agree, but it lent itself for a much more comfortable conversation than the ones he’d had prior to this. This was already going better than he had dared to hope for at this point.

“You’re going to get an unoriginal answer as well,” he admitted sheepishly, “I don’t really mind where I am or what I’m doing as long as I’m with someone I enjoy spending time with, but if I had to pick something I’d say dinner and a movie. Very basic, I know.”

“That’s fine, basic doesn’t automatically have to mean boring, right?” Mr. 8 waved to one of the waiters who was nearby, asking for two more glasses of wine after he’d noticed Rogue’s empty glass. He sneezed again.

“Right. Well since we’re already on a streak of being unoriginal, What do you like to do in your free time? ”

“Nothing special, just hanging out with friends, watch some movies, play some games. It looks like we’re both really good at being unoriginal,” he laughed, followed by yet another sneeze. He blinked a couple of times and then started rubbing at his eyes.

“Okay, so weird question, but do you happen to have a cat?”

“Yeah, I do,” Rogue nodded. “Would that be a problem?”

“Unfortunately, I’m afraid so. I’m extremely allergic to anything that has fur,” Mr. 8 got up, sneezing once more as he searched through his pockets. “I think I’d better take my allergy pills, be right back!”

He left for the men’s room, leaving Rogue to sigh deeply as he watched his departure.

“Sure,” he mumbled, filling in the final 4 on his scorecard right before the bell rang for the final time.

So that was it. He’d wasted a large part of his Saturday afternoon in a restaurant he’d normally never set foot in. At least the wine was good and drinks had already been included in the signup costs. And since he was now presented with two glasses of it, and doubted that Mr. 8 would be returning he’d resigned himself that he’d be wasting even more of his time here. He had gotten all dressed up anyway.

“Hi, mind if I joined you?”

Rogue was surprised, and more than confused when the seat at the other side of his table was suddenly taken. A spotless white button-up and a badge that had the restaurant’s logo and the name Sting on it told him it was one of the waiters who had been serving them. Dumbstruck, Rogue scanned his scorecard, hoping that it would give him any hint to what was going on, but all the blank spaces had been filled in by him already.

“…Now?” he questioned. He left the card for what it was and focused his attention back to his newly acquired company. “But…isn’t the event over already? And aren’t you supposed to be working?”

“The event is over and so is my shift, but there’s still half a Valentine’s Day left so I thought, since all of your dates have been kind of disastrous, I should make up for it. Something along the lines of…dinner and a movie?”

Rogue was speechless. “ Make up for it,” for him to state that with such conviction, as if he was going to be the redeeming factor of the train wreck that had been Rogue’s first- and decisively last- attempt at speed dating slash Valentine’s Day. Not that he’d even have to bring much to the table to improve the whole situation, as his -for lack of a better term- competition had set the bar pretty damn low, but the out-of-the-blue proposal was more than intriguing. There was a strangely irresistible charm to his cockiness, and good looks weren’t Rogue’s top requirement or anything, but fuck he was seriously cute.

“So… what do you say?”

Oh, right. He might want to answer.

“Uhm… sure?”

“Cool!” Sting chugged the whole glass of wine in front of him in one go, then started to untie the apron around his waist as he got up. “But not here though, my coworkers can be such a pain in the ass. Give me like five minutes to change and get my stuff, I’ll be right back!” he beamed, and just like that he was gone again.

Rogue stared off into space for what must have been a full minute, trying to process what had just happened. He pinched himself, and yes, he definitely felt that, so he hadn’t just made that all up and he was about to go on a real date for the first time in God knows how long. On Valentine’s Day. With someone he had just met minutes ago, without even a proper introduction.

On the one hand, he didn’t have much to lose, and it couldn’t get much worse from here. On the other, he found himself hoping he wouldn’t fuck this up, with no reason to explain this feeling that made any sense.

His wine met the same fate as Sting’s had, tossed back like a tequila shot at a frat party.

As he turned in his number tag and scorecard to the speed-dating event runners, panic and excitement were playing a game of tug-o-war with him, with no clear winner emerging from the battle until Sting came running through the staff door, dressed in plain dark jeans and a Star Wars hoodie.

“I hope you don’t mind that I’m horribly underdressed compared to you? If I’d known I would be going on a date after work I would’ve made a bigger effort.”

Rogue didn’t mind at all. He was thrilled to learn they seemed to have at least one common interest, and with a bright smile he replied what was supposed to be “You look fine, I wish I wasn’t wearing these clothes,” but because of his sudden excitement he tripped over the words and it came out as “It’s fine if you’re not wearing clothes.”

He felt his face heat up like a frying pan. How he’d managed a fuckup of this magnitude after just five fucking minutes was beyond him, but this would go down as one of those moments he’d still feel embarrassed about when it replayed in his head and kept him up at night.

It would be great if the earth could just open up and swallow him whole.

“Wait- NO, I didn’t mean-”

He tried to do some damage control but gave up when Sting burst into laughter, and against all Rogue’s expectations, he wasn’t the least bit deterred.

“Come on, let’s get out of here before the only place we can still get a table will be McDonald’s,” he grinned, linking their arms so he could lead a still rebounding Rogue towards the exit.

As he followed Sting out of the restaurant Rogue couldn’t help but be enthralled by this unforeseen development, and he wondered how Yukino was going to react to it.

Actually, no, that was a lie. He knew exactly how she was going to react to it. She was going to grill him, tease him, and pry as many details out of him as she could, and he had no idea if it was intuition or just wishful thinking, but he hoped he’d have a lot to tell her once he had fumbled himself through tonight.

[dkettchen]

BLACK MIRROR S5E1 “STRIKING VIPERS” E X P L A I N E D

-with the help of gender and game theory-

Y’all asked for it so here we go

Some things before we start: -If you were watching the episode looking for gay/trans shit, and got disappointed, I’m sorry but I can’t help you because that’s just not what the episode was about and that is ok. It explored some aspects of queer experience, and the limbo between queer and cis-straight experience, that isn’t usually addressed in such an honest and indepth way, which I think is just as important as trans or gay rep.  -I will focus my analysis on the core theme of what certain academics writing about androgyny call the “moment of transgression” so in this case the question of ‘what is Karl/Roxette’s deal & what does that mean for Danny/Lance’s feelings toward and interactions with them?’. -CW: transphobia, homophobia, toxic masculinity, (rpg) uncanny valley stuff, you get it, you know what subjects we’ll be talking about here. 

Now!

I’d like to start by pointing out the title “Striking Vipers” to get the phallus talk out of the way right off the bat x’D: It’s a very blatant penis metaphor, and Vipers specifically are venomous, so represent toxic masculinity. The image of them striking signals danger. The repetition of phallic symbols represents the threat of castration (see medusa turning them bois to stone & the heroic masculinity of the mirror shielded boi who managed to defeat her), which to phallocentric masculinity is the scawiest thing there is (losing the phallus = losing manhood = death?? I guess??). Striking Vipers means that toxic masculinity, by nature, is a threat to itself. (I could talk for hours about the exact warped logic of phallocentricity but Imma spare y’all cause I don’t think it’s relevant for this, I’d even go as far as saying this episode was anti-phallic (which I use here as a more inclusive word for “feminist”, as the episode’s core is about two guys, but still focused on them experiencing and embracing feminine power and freeing themselves from phallocentricity(/patriarchy)’s grasp, just like “what men want” was preoccupied with the toxic masculinity of its female protagonist)) That sets up the kind of horror the episode will be about, the male fear of castration, of loss of identity, of having to face the fact that traditional masculinity is toxic even to the people who conform to it. 10/10 title choice.

Next up: the core question of what label to put on Karl and Danny’s VR interactions (‘Fellas, is it gay to fuck ur best friend in a lady body in VR?’). Which leads to the first question which is: what gender is Karl when he’s playing as Roxette?  An essentialist might say: ‘Well he’s a man irl so he’s still a man even if he plays with a female avatar. Danny’s attraction to him is either him being trapped or just plain old gay.’ But I don’t think that’s the case. It’s not a trap scenario (have some videos on traps and how they’re not real actually: (x.), (x.)), because both people involved know the exact parameters of the situation. Danny knows this is Karl in Roxette’s body, there’s nothing hidden, no misunderstanding to be had here. I also don’t think it’s gay because if it was this would’ve happened irl or with two male avatars, but it only happened once one of them was in a female avatar, that was the change that made it happen. It’s not a fetishising phallic/trans women scenario either, because it’s the opposite, it’s a man’s mind in a woman’s body. There’s no doubt about Karl being a man irl, a queer man sure, but definetely a man. He’s just too into -womanhood while playing her for me to say he’s still male when he’s in that form, like Karl as Roxette isn’t a trans guy as a man’s mind in a female body usually would be (like f.e. Ranma 1/2), I also don’t think Karl as Roxette is an androgyne/non-binary/third term either, because again, he’s embracing her womanhood and the role that comes with it, to the extreme that is hetero PiV sex, too much. I’d argue what we see is the closest to the liberation and euphoria described by other queer men when doing drag, she’s just a more extreme version of drag, of crossplaying, making the fantasy real, wearing not only the clothes of a woman but the body too. Roxette as Karl’s avatar is an alter ego, who is female, so -on the risk of sounding like the biggest performativist since Judith Butler- Karl as Roxette presents as female, so, for all intents and purposes, is female in that moment, regardless of his irl persona maintaining his male gender outside of that. 

But that wasn’t what we wanted to know, was it. Because even if, in the moment that Karl plays Roxette, we can say that person is female, that doesn’t eliminate the fact that Karl, outside of that, isn’t and that he’s still the one playing her. It’s the notion of how the player/actor/performer and avatar/character/persona aren’t the same thing and can have different relationships with someone in real life vs in the game, and how that can be confusing to think about because there is no clear line between the two, something that is called “bleed” in ludology(/game studies, from lat. ludus: game or school; referring to the gladiator schools in like the colosseum), despite their relationships being fundamentally different (in this case friendship irl vs passionate love in game).  Take TAZ as an example: The McElroys are related, but in playing a trpg, the DM, usually Griffin, takes up the mantle of all NPCs in the game world, including love interests. Griffin played Julia, Kravitz, and Danny (different Danny lol), but he’s talking to his brother, except he isn’t, is he, cause it’s not Griffin talking and it’s not his brother responding, it’s two characters interacting. A similar uncanny valley can be found in actor/character bleed: Take Ludi and Pom (the actors for Lance and Roxette) in this one: like 80% of their screentime was spent making out or having fake sex. These actors aren’t dating (as far as I’m aware lol), this is their job, to fake love each other on screen, imagine having to do that with a coworker you feel nothing for. It’s the characters that feel something and you have to play that feeling (which is so meta at that point, they’re playing characters that are avatars being played by characters in the show). Also, talking of role-playing, can we appreciate the scene of Danny & Theo at the bar where they’re role-playing and she’s like that was hot and he’s like mental note bae’s into role-playing, because DAMN that foreshadowing of the erotic potential of roleplay as a concept.

But it’s not role-playing really either with Danny and Karl, is it? They’re playing in avatars other than themselves but they’re not fully a different person. They still very much feel the same just in a different form. Their emotions are real even though they might only apply to part of their experience, the in-game part. Yet they obviously take them seriously and personal and get influenced by them outside the game. Maybe the question is what is and is not role-playing? Where does the bleed start and end, and do we even need to know the answer to those questions? They answer those questions for themselves in the end by testing out their feelings irl to see if they track or not, fully ready for both possibilities (which 10/10 character development love it). They want clarity. It’s about the emotional limbo fantasy brings with it. It’s the same question “Are traps gay” is about. (Not the “Is it ok to feel attracted to androgynous ppl” one necessarily, but) “Does feeling attracted to the fantasy mean you feel attracted to the “real” thing underneath?” Are the feelings for the fantasy alone or also for the reality? Are they only applicable to the latter and does that change something about what you thought you knew about yourself? It’s a question about the fringe edges of limited/monosexuality and the very fabric of reality. 

Let’s return to Karl to look at his experience as Roxette. We’ve established that she is female, but what is Karl while playing her? In the spirit of queer drag as liberating, it’s almost like he’s taking a break from being Karl when playing as her. Drag, crossplay, or this extreme version of it, functions as a break from the toxicity and limitations of traditional gender roles (so in this case traditional masculinity). It is freeing, though what does it free? Some genderless spirit inhabiting each person? But then how do you explain the firm gender identity lots of people, including for all we know Karl, experience in everyday life? As a trans person I know that there is SOMETHING to gender on some level that can create gender dysphoria (social and/or physical) for people when put in a body they don’t identify with. As a drag performer, trpg enthousiast, and notorious crossplayer, I know that taking a break from that reality and being somebody else can be relieving, a break from your own problems. So what is that part of us that translates into fantasy? I feel like this goes into transhumanist territory which I don’t know enough about to even attempt to provide an answer. I think what it comes down to in terms of gender theory is, this is a situation at the height of where performativism is true and relevant. There is a relativity to the nature of reality and gender itself. Whatever base essence there is that causes gender dysphoria at a mismatch between outside and inside, doesn’t apply here. Both notions (of essential and performative gender) are real and have an impact on people but neither is always the case and neither is never the case. They’re not mutually exclusive. 

So, seeing as it seems impossible to pinpoint what gender Karl/Roxette qualifies as (other than all and/or none), let’s look at the nature of Danny/Lance and Karl/Roxette’s interactions and feelings toward those interactions and each other to try and contextualise what label(s) they might fit under.  The desire on Danny’s side when faced with Roxette’s form shows itself in a way he’d never feel toward Karl. That visual change, and the social changes it brings with it (in gender role), makes it so extreme, because it pairs the parts of his friend he appreciates and enjoys (personality and whatever deeper connection a close friendship brings with it), with a form that is attractive to him. That change translates to Karl too. In playing with this new form that has a different role and a different effect on someone he’s known for so long, he flows into that, melts into this new persona and lives it up! The way they interact in game isn’t gay. It is very much reflecting how straight attraction and female sexuality works. On one hand it’s based in undeniable difference (hetero = different), and on the other hand Karl/Roxette’s enjoyment thereof is based in being desirable, in having that power of seduction just by existing, that notion of feminine power and the freedom that comes with it. It’s not autogynephilia, that would imply he gets off on the idea of himself as a woman, which is not the case, he gets off on being desired as a woman, which is what female sexuality is about (source: ContraPoints’ Autogynephilia video (which I recommend, it’s very good))

Still whenever Karl tries to get Danny to keep having VR sex with him/Roxette, he talks about her in 3rd person, like a persona. In saying “it’s just like porn” he poses something that is very much a different activity (acting out the porn by -doin’ it-) as a homosocially (social as opposed to sexual/romantic) acceptable one (watching porn together which I’ve been told is a thing). He attempts to differentiate himself from his female persona and enjoyment there-of (by objectifying her, like a porn actress to be watched rather than identified with), himself and Danny from the queerness (in enjoying femininity and in Danny being down with basically fucking a drag-queen) and to retreat back into heteronormative traditional masculinity, away from the scawy unknown of exploring your sexuality. His internalised homo- and transphobia makes him suppose that Danny, as a supposed straight guy, will only respond to the safety of assured non-queerness, which, honestly, I don’t think is the case with him. Karl supposes his cancelling on him and not wanting to do it anymore is out of the fear for his sexual identity or whatever, but from what I can tell, while Danny also seems to be rather confused about what it all means, the reasons he cancels their nightly sessions, and rejects Karl/Roxette, are always about not wanting his marriage to fall apart. He quite clearly prefers hot VR sex to hanging out with his wife, and cancels out of duty to her rather than fear. Even the first time they kiss, Karl is the one to freak out first. Danny seems much calmer about the attraction part of the situation, to the point of in the end being the one to take initiative and make them try it out irl to put an end to the confusion.

The episode hits hard because it takes the way men play video games and brings it to its logical conclusion. Video games are mens safe-space, and they do play with that playful flirty banter. The show takes that and makes it real, including taking it to its extreme conclusion that is -doin’ it-. It infiltrates the male safe space by taking normalised behaviour, and taking it so far that it puts traditional masculinity and heteronormative attraction in question, the very thing the safe space was supposed to protect them from. That’s why it’s existentially horrifying for the main characters (and viewers that identify with them) and qualifies as a black mirror episode even without having a homo-/trans-/biphobic ending (like other media that put traditional masculinity in question usually do, not to mention all the horror based in queer-coding) 

Hope y’all enjoyed this journey into a bit of mind-bending game and gender theory! Pls don’t expect me to do this like ever again bc I need to go work on my actual essay rip x’D