#guys did I at least bake
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royaltea000 · 4 months ago
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Liu Er Mihou time!!!
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al-luviec · 4 months ago
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still haven't moved on from zane in this episode (aka I hit tag limit again and am unhappy about it)
#alek insanity#not gonna main tag this but prepare for a tiny rant#home is actually really good zane characterization and its super cool to me how it holds up to this day#s1 characterization is very specific to me because the behaviors displayed by the ninja there (mostly) isnt bc thats how they really are but#its due to societal pressure. cole originally being more 'stone faced tough guy' -> 'down to earth' -> 'really sensible easy to talk to guy'#is because hes always been a sensitive guy... but he felt he couldnt express that true version of himself. thats the whole thing behind his#true potential. jay going from s1 -> s6 -> now is less of societal pressure and more teenager figuring himself out but it still applies. ish#seeing how much the ninja have changed or grown from then to now is amazing because back then they all wore masks. they didnt know each#other all that well. but theyve gained that comfortability with each other and also have grown and matured as people#some seasons / eps characterization for certain people im not a fan of (lloyds random misogyny arc in s13) but i mean the overall trend here#and then there is zane. zane in home was pretty dead on to how he behaves now (at least... when it comes to his faults?) and i dont want to#say people skim over that but i am the sf proclaimed n1 s1e2 fan and overthink every scene. zane's early characterization is some of my fav#for him period. he also goes through a ton of traumatic stuff and a ton of bad writing bouts but why he acts so 'weird' or 'distant' has#always been a thread sewn in. he changed so much he stayed the same in a way... if that makes sense. -> ohhh the ninja get mail and he#doesnt? oh he has no family? he quite literally walks away from that situation. oh the ninja are yelling in his face and asking whats wrong#with him? he literally walks away from that situation. he says its to follow the falcon but seeing how he apologized to them by not only#baking a ton of pies (cough... the food fight is what led to him leaving at first) but he also found them a whole entire new house.#zane is unable to truly value what he does for others. insert him in s11 saying he 'tried' to fufill his goal of protecting others.#everything he has ever done still isnt good enough. then the ninja tried to apologize and he didnt really... let them.#that one post about characters putting on facades and that facade being how people really see them. even in fandom. thats zane to me#the guy who lies about being upset and avoids his problems ran away after being yelled at? and he said he wasnt really mad? that is a lie!!#him being a ~360 when it comes to his character development is neat to me because he never hid behind a mask in the same way the others did#cole wanting to seem tough vs being really soft? kai wanting approval so bad he starts being selfish? kai isnt selfish usually!#he is self centered but that is a whole different thing. just wanting to fit in and breaking free of that. zane's true potential came in the#form of 'i finally know why i am not normal' instead of 'i will be my true self'. zane never pretended to not be weird#(instert book) states he literally didnt know why people got mad at him. he just existed and it was 'wrong'. the mask he hid behind was#avoidance. he was pretty open about how he actually was (most of the time). when he was upset he would audibly sigh and walk away lol#but for him saying he wasnt upset / saddened by the ninja... it felt like a moment of selflessness. if that makes sense. he blamed himself#for the monestary burning down. so he didnt deserve the apologies (ish) in the virtues of spinjitzu zane is shown as the generous one iirc#he puts the needs of others over his own. he will bear whatever burden he needs if others are happy. at that same time he doesnt allow
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toytulini · 6 months ago
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reeeeeeally wish. it didnt feel. like the needs of my body vs the needs of my brain were actively in fucking conflict with each other in a way that makes it impossible to function or exist
#toy txt post#chronic pain#just. really frustrated. cant see a way out or through or over or whatever here yall#augh#and dad wants me to. do what i was doing before that made everything worse somehow as a method to get my foot in the door and fucking#network???? to do?????? unclear. until i get what. middle management?#how the fuck would that help anything#meanwhile i am trying to muster the executive function to complete. the catpans#ouaghghahghhgghg#it is so hard to be gentle with myself about this bc it doesnt feel like i deserve gentleness for it! like i have worked so hard to try to#unlearn the ableism and shit but that doesnt really fucking help much if both my parents just keep that shit so deeply baked into their#worldview that they interpret me trying to treat myself a little gentler as being a lazy freeloader or whatever#like im really trying not to be too harsh on myself about this but for what? at least if im mean to me about it i have ground to stand on#in calling their meanness unjust and unnecessary cos dont worry!!!!!!!!! i can reproduce the entire fucking ableism cycle inside my own#head and self flagellate for not being able ti push through it like you guys did so you dont have to! in fact i am so good at it that it#makes it an impossible topic to address! bc i just speedrun everything into thinking of myself as worthless so you dont have to! see im not#a total laze/s#god. i hate this so much so fucking much. aaaaagh. there are a number of things i CAN do and unfortunately none of them seem to be#the necessary administrative faff of it all#oausbdjsfusbfhshhrrrgrhrhgggg#trying to organize notes of talking points to unpack this a little in therapy this week but its only the second appt. so like. she wanted#to go through a bit of a questionnaire? idkkkk
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robinsnest2111 · 11 months ago
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I think there'll always be spoiled food in the cabinets as long as my mother's in charge of grocery shopping...
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dogmasquerade · 5 months ago
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slightly niche moment- seeing people post about watching their animal slowly die / suffer over a few days instead of just euthanasing it makes me kinda mad
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mysticlael · 19 days ago
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Bat inco quotes
Roy, in Jason’s bed: Morning… how’d ya sleep last night? Jason, knocking Roy off: WHAT THE HELL?! Roy: Ow— Jason: What were you doing in my bed? You were supposed to sleep on the air mattress on the floor! Roy: I had a nightmare. Jason: You had a nightmare? What are you, five years old? Roy: Listen, I needed to feel comfortable and I was getting this perverse power dynamic vibe from me sleeping on the floor and you sleeping up there- Jason, in a royal accent: Why yes, how high and mighty I am up on my twin XL! Roy: That is not what I meant— Jason: Silence in the presence of your king, who sleeps a lofty twelve and a half inches above the ground! Roy: Listen, I’m not ashamed. I slept comfortably when I got up on your bed and I’m sure you did too. Jason: Yeah, okay- Roy: You know what? I wanna know. How’d you sleep last night? Jason: …That was the best I’ve slept in a while. Roy, gasping: The king slept comfortably with a peasant in his bed! Jason: I did not consent to this- Roy, dramatically: But my liege, our love is forbidden! Jason, on the phone: Hi, is this the front desk? Yeah, there’s a bed bug in my room and he’s five-foot-eleven, he’s got red hair- Roy: Ask them if they have one of those “Do Not Disturb” signs. I’ll put it on the door next time we… do it. Jason: Okay, I'ma go shower and wash all of the you off of me. Roy: Oh, maybe together we could— Jason: NO. Roy: Just to save water— Jason: No! You don’t even pay for the water! Roy: …Good point.
Steph: *Texts a selfie to the group chat* Hey besties!! Jason: *Texts a selfie clearly parodying Steph's* hey besties !!1! Steph: I literally hate you so much.
Dick, holding a box of Lunchables: Ah, I loved these when I was your age… fine dining. Damian: Fix yourself.
Tim: What did you guys get in your yearbook? Steph: 'Prettiest Smile' Dick: 'Nicest Personality' Jason: 'Most likely to start a bar fight' Cass: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'
Steph: Today at 7 am, Tim poured a Monster energy drink in their coffee, said "I'm going to die" and drank the whole thing. Dick: I watched Tim brew their coffee with Monster instead of water. Three cups in two hours. I think they ascended into the astral realm. Damian: The survivability of the human race never fails to amaze me.
Damian, carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day? Bruce: … Bruce: What’s in the box? Damian: What woul- Bruce: Damian, what’s in the box? Damian: I think you know.
Bruce: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Damian: Even better! Bruce: What the fuck did you- Damian: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.
Tim: What are we gonna do?! Jason: Blame you?
*Dick comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in Barbara’s bedroom.* Barbara: Dick, are you.. coming to bed? Dick: No thank you, I’m sure you’re lovely but I have a girlfriend. Dick: *Lies on the ground and falls asleep* Barbara: ...
Roy: sapnu puaS. Kori: What?? Jason: What language is that? Roy: Turn your phone 180 degrees. *Roy was removed from the groupchat*
Kon, admiring a sleeping Tim: You’re so cute. Tim, sleepily: I could beat your ass. Kon, lovingly: I know.
Duke: How do those little boys on XBOX parties always know what slur to call you? Tim: They're empaths.
Steph: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute. Dick: No, that's not how you make cookies. Duke: FLOOR IT!! Jason: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!? Damian: YOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN- Steph: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES! Tim: DO IT! Bruce: NO-
Tim, at Kon: Would you like to stay for dinner? Bernard, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!
Damian: What the fuck is with english teachers and being like; "write a story about a deep and personal memory that impacted your life". Ma'am, if I do that you're going to send me to the counselor's office.
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tbaluver · 5 months ago
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Can you write the guys reaction to having a baby girl as their first child? (I'm a sucker for papa's little princesses)
Thank you and your works are the best and comforting!
Papa's Little Princess- The Love And DeepSpace Men
synopsis: when your first child is a girl! genre: fluff fluff a/n: omg this was such a cute idea i wish they were real (╥﹏╥) and thank you so much! i hope my works can continuing being comforting for you and anybody else <3 i hope this was okay and that you enjoy this! (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
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Xavier:
His little star
A gentle father. He's the type to never yell at his daughter but he'll provide positive disciplining strategies with you.
He wants to be in every part of his daughter's life in any way he can. He wouldn't really know how to do his daughter's hair but he was willing to try ! He would watch you tie her hair, braid, and put many accessories in her hair and he would be confused on how you did all that. He tried looking up how to do her hair and his first time wasn't the best.....but after some practice with you, he would be a pro just like you!
Do NOT let these two bake together especially with the easy bake ovens. Nearly set the kitchen on fire attempting to make cookies for you. He couldn't say no to her when she wanted to cook or try baking with him. You don't know how but it ended up burnt or with the weirdest toppings ever and a broken easy bake oven.
Nap time is serious business with these two. They are not to be disturbed. She's either asleep on his chest or in his lap. Whenever you take walks and she gets too tired, he'll carry her around on his back. She'll rest her head on the crook of his neck while he holds onto her tightly.
She would have all the plushies, toys, and snacks she wants! He'll do his all to get her the plushies in the claw machine to make his little angel jump up and down in joy. She could never have enough
Loves to join her in her imaginative play whether she wants to be a princess or an astronaut. It makes playtime full of joy and adventure
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Zayne:
You two would have the most polite, well mannered, and kindest daughter ever.
Loves to participate in playing house with her. He'll sit on the floor or the tiny chairs from the tea party set you gotten for her. He'll play the role with no complaints and tell her that the tea is delicious even though there is absolutely no tea in the plastic cup.
He's a doctor but he can't help but sneak a few sweet treats for her. If she wants some before lunch or dinner then she can have at least one before she eats her meal and then she'll have plenty more after. These two would have cavities later on.
He would make her all the mini snowmen and other things she wants from his evol. He finds her reaction to be adorable each time, it never gets old.
If your daughter mentions a boy, he would tell her she can have a boyfriend around 30. She would be happy and so was he. Mainly because she has no concept of time and age yet.
Your daughter loves to hear him read. Even though she was still very very young and didn't grasp everything just yet, he would read her stories and explain them with care and patience, aiming to entertain and nurture her curiosity. She loves to sit on his lap and sometimes she'll fall asleep on him.
He would let her pick any flower she wants to grow in your garden at the backyard. You would all start a small garden together and he would teach her how to care for them.
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Rafayel:
Takes playing house a little too seriously. Whatever role his daughter gives him, he's giving it his all.
Oh he was so excited when your daughter first held a crayon. He colors with her a lot and eventually will introduce her to paint. He would tell her that she's doing so well even if they were just blobs. She's going to be an artist just like her papa. He'll even add some of her artwork on his so he can point it out to her if he were to have another exhibition tour.
First time at the beach with his daughter was such an emotional day for him. Hearing and seeing her squeal when her little feet touched the water warmed his heart. He held her so tightly and tenderly, reassuring her that she won't float away because her papa's got her. He teaches her a lot about how some fishes are friendly and one day he'll meet some of his fish friends.
He'll eventually tell her all about Lemuria whenever it was time for bed and he thought it's so cute whenever she wanted to hear more about it.
Would absolutely love to play dress up with her. Sometimes he'll pick some of her clothes out and he would think she is beautiful just like her mama. They'll make a little runway and model the outfits.
He would keep all the little milestones she has made and any memories. He'll keep all the photos, drawings, and any mementos to look back at the treasured memories.
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Sylus:
The second person who will ever see his soft side is his daughter. You being the first.
He is protective over his daughter and with you. If anyone were to look at either one of you wrong? Sleep with one eye open.
He does not have fragile masculinity! He will let her apply as much toy makeup as she wants on his face. He'll play dress up with her as much as she wants no matter how obscure the outfits are! He has no complaints, anything to make his little angel smile and happy.
She loves hearing him sing lullabies. It puts her to sleep immediately but sometimes she'll sing or hum along with him.
If you tell your daughter no to something then she'll ask Sylus. He can't say no to his sweet baby girl. Just don't tell mom. He doesn't know what true fear is until he meets a mothers anger.
Loves to spoil her just like how he loves to spoil you. Not to the point where she's a brat though, you two would teach her to be better than that. "Just because" gifts to make her feel special without any special occasions
Anytime he would be away for business, he'll always bring you two something back. Something that you both either love or reminds him of you two or maybe both.
BONUS (All): They would all be patient fathers overall. They would never yell if your daughter showed any emotions especially if their daughters were to cry. They’re offering their own patience, love, and comfort in their own way. They would be there for your daughter emotionally as they were with you.
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himbosandhardwear · 1 month ago
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Steddie I Soulmate AU I 2k I Rated Mature I idiot4idiot
The thing about linking with your soulmate, you never knew when it was going to happen. There were horror stories about it happening during weddings to someone else or while performing heart surgery or landing a plane, but linking was so rare, stories like that seemed more like fairy tales than cautionary ones.
If anyone had asked Eddie what he thought about it, he would've said the odds of there being some guy out there destined to be his mate, let alone that he'd have to worry about linking during some critical moment, were astronomically low.
He'd be wrong.
Because his ears are ringing, his vision has tunnelled, and there's an empty vacuum where his usual chaotic thoughts should be. All signs pointing toward-
Hello?
Jesus H. Christ, not now! Not right now, this cannot be happening now. Quick! Think of something else! Uhhh… Golems! Ice golems! Or maybe frost giants. Yeah! Not having hate sex with your arch nemesis. Shit! Stop thinking about it! Frost giants, frost giants, frost giants!
Hate sex? He hears echo around his noggin next. Arch nemesis?
Fuuuuuck. No, darlin’, don't even worry about that stray thought! Nothing to see here. I'm, uh, baking! Yeah. Brownies. For a charity bake sale
A long pause, empty space between them, before he says, I don't believe you. I think you are having sex
Sex?! He screeches. How dare you! I would never!
You would. Go balls deep into a guy you don't even like, sounds like to me. Class act.
Oh god, there’s gotta be a way to salvage this.
No, let me explain, please!
Knock yourself out
Right. So, this guy, I know him from school, right? And he was always kind of a jerk. The space between them pings with a sort of stung feeling but Eddie doesn't understand how any of this works yet so he ignores it. But we end up having a few mutual friends, and this one really weird event happens that forces us to, like, team up, I guess. After all that I'm spending more time around the guy and he's not so bad. Invited me over to smoke up with him, which was cool. I'm gonna be totally honest, I'm not sure how exactly we got here, the sex part, but it’s pretty hot and heavy, kinda aggressive, so… yeah. Hate sex I guess
Soulmate is quiet again. His feelings bleed through anyway, at least Eddie's pretty sure that's what he's getting. It feels like embarrassment and disappointment.
You okay? Did I scare you off?
You don't like the guy at all? You said arch nemesis
Oh. Uh. Well… How did he explain to his future partner, if he hadn't already ruined it, that he likes him plenty, he's just been holding him at arms length, metaphorically, because he assumed the guy was straight? Up until roughly twenty minutes ago. He should probably start with honesty.
No, I like him okay. He's not as bad as I'd always thought. We give each other shit but I'm pretty sure it's just left over bullshit stereotypes from high school. I bully him about his music taste, he bullies me about my shitty van. That type of thing
…Right
He waits to hear back from his soulmate but he's not very talkative. That's okay, Eddie can talk enough for both of them.
So, what were you up to when we linked? Not driving I hope
He can hear the guy sighing over the link, which is worrying.
You'll never believe it, but I'm also having sex at the moment
Seriously? That's hilarious
Yeah. A hoot
Not having fun?
I was. But I recently found out the guy doesn't like me that much. So, yeah, real mood killer
Oh man. That sucks
Oh my god. Yeah, it really does. Kinda wish he'd get off of me so we can get the awkward part over with but he's distracted at the moment
Doing what?! Eddie yells, offended on his behalf.
“He’s busy not realizing he linked to the guy he was hate fucking.”
Huh?
“Eddie, open your fucking eyes.”
That's Steve talking.
He blinks his eyes open to see Steve looking up at him. He's not pleased.
Wait
“Yeah.”
Oh my god
“As impressive as it is that you managed to stay hard through that whole thing, I'd appreciate it if you-” He hisses as Eddie, rudely he realizes, pulls out without warning.
He scrambles to the end of the bed, bunching up the comforter around his junk. “I'm so sorry, fuck, Steve, I'm so sorry. I don't… I didn't…”
He can't fix this, he starts to slowly comprehend. He's made Steve think he hates him.
“Nah, it's cool. I get it.”
I don't hate you, I swear. You have to believe me
“Sure, Eddie.” He's yanking his briefs back on, angry and trying not to show it. “You just don't like me much.” Can't believe I did this again. So fucking stupid
Eddie's certain he's not meant to hear any of that but he responds anyway.
You're not stupid. Please let me explain
“You already did. And I am fucking stupid,” he snaps. “Here I thought we were flirting this whole time and you thought we were bullying each other. That's real fuckin’ stupid of me. I'd convinced myself you actually-” He snaps his teeth shut but Eddie can still hear the unfinished -liked me. “I really wish you would control your feelings, dude. You're broadcasting your horror straight into my head.”
“I don't know how to stop,” he quietly admits.
“Well if you'd ever shown up to health class you'd know how to control it.”
I never thought I would get a soulmate
Steve's surprise at that pings around his brain before he does what Eddie can't and shuts it down.
“I did. I've been thinking about it for years.”
And you ended up with me… And I ruined it before we even got started. I ruined it. Steve Harrington is my soulmate and I ruined it. What the fuck
“You don't have to say it like I'm some kind of prize.” He steps into his jeans and tugs them back up to his hips, not even bothering to do them up. Which is- “I guess it's nice that you think I'm hot. That's something. Maybe we'll be the first casual hookup soulmates.”
He has to fix this. Somehow. Think, god damnit! Wait! That's it! He just has to show Steve what he's thinking!
“I wish you wouldn't.”
“Too bad!” He snaps back.
Okay, as embarrassing as this is about to be, he has to tell the truth.
Eddie was in the 8th grade, Steve in 7th, when they first met. Or, when Eddie first noticed Steve anyway, they never really spoke to each other, their cliques already established by then. But Eddie can remember it like it was yesterday. It was lunch, Eddie was walking by with his bagged PB&J, when he heard it. Steve laughing. It was so joyful, Eddie didn't even know what he was laughing about but it made him smile anyway. Of course one of Steve's shitty jock friends caught him staring and called him a queer freak but that wasn't unusual.
“What the fuck, Eddie? Why do you remember that? And how are you so good at visualizing?”
He ignores the questions to move on to the next memory. Eddie's sophomore year they somehow ended up in the same Shop class. Again, they never spoke but he got to watch Steve work, tongue poking out while he concentrated, the proud look on his face when he whittled some hunk of wood into a recognisable shape.
“I forgot about that. It was a dolphin. I was dating Chelsea Hosteller, they were her favorite animal.”
“Lucky her.”
“Hey, fuck you, man, you're the one showing me this shit! What am I supposed to assume from any of this? You thought I was cute? So what? You clearly don't like who I am as a person, so what difference does it make?”
He's not going to have the patience for every single moment, and they're a lot of them, Eddie realizes that now. So he speed runs through them, making sure to send every bit of feeling through their link.
Steve in his Scoops outfit, luring Eddie to the mall but never making him brave enough to go in. The horror of not knowing whether Steve was alive or dead when he heard about the mall burning down. The joy of finding him at Family Video, somewhere he had reason to visit.
You never even talked to me there
Listening to every word to every story Henderson told him about Steve and his bravery. Pretending to be annoyed so no one noticed he was eating it up. Getting to know the real Steve over Spring Break, the giddiness he couldn't quite tamp down, even as he was scared shitless. The pain of knowing Steve was still in love with Nancy Wheeler, even though it was the obvious narrative to Steve's fairytale life. Of course he gets the girl at the end.
What? Is that why you-
The way he stuck around afterward, even though their dynamic was more antagonistic than friendly, and the way Eddie thrived off of every snarky comment. How it felt like banter even though Eddie knew, by all logic and reason, Steve was merely tolerating his presence. They would always be antithetical to each other, circling but never meeting.
Eddie, no
Steve growling ‘Do you ever shut up!’ before pouncing on him downstairs. The heavy pounding of his heart as he wrestled Steve up the stairs. The way his brain never did catch up to what was happening or why, until it was too late, and he was ruining both the greatest sex he'd ever had and also the chance to prove, though he's still completely unworthy, that he has already been primed and ready to fall for Steve for years. The shame of ruining it. The heartbreak of ruining it. The teeny, tiny spark of hope as Steve stares him down. He has to close his eyes to avoid it, lest he say something stupid and fuck it up again.
You…do like me?
Yeah, Stevie. I like you a whole lot. I just didn't think I was allowed to like you. I didn't realize you liked me too. I'm sorry I said all that shit earlier. I didn't want to tell the guy I'd just linked with that I was thoroughly enjoying the chance to sleep with this guy I'd had a crush on for years. That seemed rude
The bed dips and so does Eddie's stomach. Steve's enormous hands slide up his neck, into his hair, and gently cradle his face as he leans in to kiss Eddie square on the mouth.
Oh. Hi
Hi
This is nice
I think so too. How do you feel about finishing what we started but this time we both know that we like each other?
That sounds awesome. But are you sure? I really, really fucked up the first time
I thought you were perfect up until you called me your arch nemesis
I have been told that sometimes I'm a little dramatic
You know what, that's fair. I really should've taken that as a compliment, if anything
See? Now you get it
What I'm getting is another condom. Hold my ankle so I don't slide off the bed
You got it, baby
Unbelievable. Salvaged the wreckage of his own stupidity and managed to bag the hottest guy in town! Score one for the nerds!
“I heard that.”
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callmeagardengnome · 23 days ago
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✗ sugar and sin ✗ | PARK SEONGHWA
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pairings  ✃  mafia! seonghwa x fem! reader
genre  ✃  mafia au, non-idol au, SLOW BURNN
synopsis  ✃  
seonghwa goes above and beyond to eliminate his targets: going undercover in places they go to most. when you happen to spend your time in a secluded bakery, seonghwa decides to bake your treats with doses of poison - yet somehow, you keep surviving.
in which you thought you made a new friend in your local bakery, when in reality - your ‘baker’ keeps mistaking laxatives for poison.
w.c  ✃ 9.1k
c.w  ✃ dark themes, some desc of gore, poison, drink-spiking, kiss scene but no smut, very very slight yandere behaviour, cursing, reader + seonghwa are in their 20s (not too relevant to plot), reader wants to be an architect.
author’s note: ngl, this story ended up a little more wholesome than i anticipated but oh well. remember to reblog and comment if you enjoyed, any and all feedback helps!
not proofread!
masterlist
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it was official. you were a walking, unkillable creature sent to test seonghwa’s patience. 
you had to be at this point. that was the sixth poisoned-cream puff he’d given you this week and you were still talking on the phone about some guy you met at work. 
seonghwa’s fingers curled around the register, his knuckles turning white. when was the last time it took him this long to kill someone? five years ago?
time flies by fast - and yet it’s going painfully slow to take. you. out. 
“oh my god, no way-“ you laughed suddenly, interrupting his thoughts. 
seonghwa sighed, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. he turned around and headed for the kitchen. if you weren’t going to die quickly, the least he could do was distract himself. 
“back to baking,” he muttered through clenched teeth. 
1 MONTH AGO - SIGHTSEEING
the early morning was cool, damp and filled with the scent of rain. the light drizzle from the grey sky above pattered against the balcony railing as birds chirped louder than the traffic below.
seonghwa sat on the metal chair, placing his steaming cup of tea onto the small table next to him. 
the balcony door slid open. 
a yawn was heard from behind him. “are you people-watching again?” hongjoong asked, rubbing his eyes. 
seonghwa didn’t look back, only nodding in response.
“you’re on food duty now, remember?” hongjoong stepped onto the balcony, sitting on the chair beside his friend. “you don’t need to look for targets..”
seonghwa leaned forward, mumbling, “is it wrong to have hobbies?” 
the morning rush was in full swing - people running with umbrellas over their heads, cars splashing through puddles and delivery workers speeding on bikes. it was oddly satisfying to watch, especially when you weren’t a part of any of it.
hongjoong rested his chin on his hand. “i don’t pay you to kill anymore. i hope you know this.”
“yeah, yeah,” seonghwa said absentmindedly, like he’d done many times before - though something caught his attention.
his eyes narrowed, focusing on a girl - must be in her early 20s, hurrying down the sidewalk with a large stack of papers in her arms. her steps were rushed, nearly bumping into the people ahead of her.
and then it happened.
she tripped over her own foot, causing her to stumble forward. the papers flew out of her grasp, scattering onto the crowded pavement. she dropped to her knees, scurrying to gather them.
but before she could, a gust of wind swept most of them down the street.
seonghwa got up from his chair abruptly, his tea long forgotten.
hongjoong raised an eyebrow. “did you see something?”
seonghwa didn’t answer. his attention was fixed on you, your hands moving as fast as possible to salvage the remaining papers. just as you managed to grab a few, a van sped through a nearby puddle, splashing you from head to toe.
you froze, shivering. and to make things worse, the light rain turned into a heavy downpour. “...fuck!”
seonghwa’s eyes lit up in fascination. 
he’d never seen someone as unlucky, unfortunate and pathetic as you in all of his years. 
you were perfect.
“seonghwa-?”
a slow, almost predatory smirk spread across seonghwa’s lips. he couldn’t take his eyes off of you - the defeated and helpless girl that stood frozen on the pavement, completely drenched. 
“i found my target.”
2 WEEKS AGO - IT’S CALLED EMPLOYMENT 
the smell of fresh bread and melted butter greeted you as you pushed the bakery door open, the small bell jingling. 
“ah ‘____’!” the old baker, mrs earl, said with a smile. “it’s good to see you again.”
you gave her a bright grin. “i brought you the new crossword,” you placed a folded newspaper on the counter.
“oh honey, you’re an angel,” she thanked.
you waved off the praise, already making your way to the display case. you grabbed your free muffin (it wasn’t technically free, but mrs earl adored you enough to turn a blind eye) and took a bite.
as you ate, she wiped her hands with a dishcloth. “you know, a boy came in today. said he wanted a job.”
you raised an eyebrow. “someone applied?” 
“mhm,” she nodded, her smile widening. “i was quite shocked, he’s very young- around your age.”
“..huh,” you said, unsure of how to respond. it was hard to imagine someone else your age showing interest in such a bakery.
mrs earl’s eyes twinkled as she giggled, “he was such a gentleman, too. handsome, if i may add.”
you grinned. “mrs earl, are you into him?”
she laughed heartily. “of course not! i still have my boys at the country club..”
“..anyways,” she continued, slightly softer. “with him around, i don’t need to come in anymore.”
“...really?”
she nodded firmly. “why not? i think he’s capable enough to manage things while i go on vacation.”
“..if you say so,” you replied, a little doubtful. 
you’ve grown so attached to mrs earl that the idea of someone else stepping in felt.. strange. even then, you quickly pushed those thoughts away. you weren’t going to stop her from having her well-deserved break.
but little did you know - across the street, seonghwa sat on a weathered bench, his eyes following you. 
you were an open book, he realised. your patterns were consistent, your routine almost boring in its predictability. lunch breaks at the bakery. post-work visits for a chat and a muffin. your world revolved around this tiny little bakery that it made you so so easy to track.
it was perfect.
and now all he had to do was wait.
1 WEEK AGO - HEY I JUST MET YOU, AND THIS IS CRAZY
holy shit. 
mrs earl wasn’t kidding when she said the new hire was handsome.
a man stood behind the counter, arranging pastries with meticulous care. his hair fell perfectly, right out of a shampoo commercial, while his skin looked impossibly flawless and clean. 
“...wow,” you breathed out before you could stop yourself.
the man turned, his sharp features softened by a slight tilt of his head. 
you blinked rapidly, scrambling to recover. “i mean- hi!” you blurted with a nervous laugh. “i’m ‘____’, i’m a regular here,” you stuck your hand out.
it took a second before he shook your hand, giving you a small, polite smile. “mrs earl told me about you.”
your rubbed the back of your neck. “good things i hope..” you chuckled, earning a nod. 
“you’re..” you looked down, squinting to read the name tag pinned neatly to his apron. “seonghwa..?”
“correct.”
as seonghwa moved to the display case, you couldn’t help but watch him. everything about him was so polished, so graceful - it was like he belonged in the movies. 
when you saw the row of pastries he was arranging, you raised an eyebrow. that’s different. 
he glanced at you. “sorry, i don’t make muffins as good as mrs earl,” he admitted sheepishly. “but i think my cream puffs are up there.”
you stared at the tray of golden, perfectly piped pastries, your mouth watering. “c-can i take one?”
his lips curled into a faint smirk, his eyes darkening slightly. “of course.”
PRESENT - PLOT ARMOUR GOES CRAZYY
outside, the world bustled with its usual chaos, but inside the bakery? everything felt calm - too calm for seonghwa, whose patience was wearing dangerously thin.
from behind the counter, he had an excellent view of you. you chatted animatedly on the phone, the sunlight streaming in making you look annoyingly serene for someone who shouldn’t be here. 
“girl- the guy at my office is cutee,” you said as you stirred the remnants of your coffee.
seonghwa’s jaw tightened. the coffee you were sipping had enough poison to kill a sumo wrestler. you should’ve been dead on the floor by now.
so how the hell were you still alive?
blissfully unaware of his glare, you laughed at something your friend said. “are you crazy? why should i make the first move?”
when he first saw you, seonghwa thought you’d be his easiest target yet. he almost pitied you. your sheer unluckiness practically screamed death. 
yet here you were, as if life itself decided to mock him.
as you hung up the call, you stood up and strolled to the counter, rummaging through your bag. “how much do i owe you?”
seonghwa shook his head, sighing. “it’s on the house,” he said. 
you paused, slipping your phone into your pocket. “seonghwa, you really need to stop giving me free food,” you pulled out a ten-dollar bill.
“but i want to,” he shrugged. 
you studied him for a moment, tilting your head. “then can i get another coffee to-go, please?”
his eye twitched.
it was such an harmless request, something seemingly so simple. yet it felt like an insult to his entire career.
still, seonghwa forced a smile, taking the cash. “of course.”
turning to the coffee pot, he poured another cup. when you looked away to check your phone, he sprinkled a little extra poison into the drink - just to be sure.
“thank you so much,” your face lit up as you took the cup from him. “you’re a lifesaver.”
the irony hit him like a truck, but he simply nodded.
as you turned to leave, he stared at the coffee pot, his mind spinning.
how? how?
you were unkillable. immune. an anomaly wrapped in plot armour so thick and absurd it made his chest ache with something he couldn’t name. 
obsession, frustration, fascination - it all blurred together into one singular thought:
he needed stronger poison.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
“..helloo?” a hand waved in front of seonghwa, snapping him out of his thoughts.
seonghwa blinked, turning to find wooyoung standing beside him, wooden spoon in hand, his apron splattered in sauces. 
“you’re sanding the plate,” wooyoung smirked before turning back to the bubbling pot on the stove. 
the sound of running water filled the hideout’s small kitchen, together with the clanging of pots and pans. seonghwa stood over the sink, yellow rubber gloves on his hands as he washed the dishes.
seonghwa looked down - and to his horror, he’d been scrubbing the same spot on the plate for who knows how long. a noticeable mark formed, the glaze nearly wearing off. 
wooyoung glanced over his shoulder. “you okay?”
“yeah,” seonghwa replied.
a short silence followed before wooyoung spoke up again. “…you still haven’t killed that girl.”
seonghwa rolled his eyes, nearly breaking the ceramic in his hands. “don’t remind me. she’s invincible.”
“invincible?” wooyoung barked out a laugh, his shoulders shaking. “to you?”
seonghwa’s lips pressed into a thin line, sighing. the memory of the coffee earlier was still fresh in his mind. “my poison doesn’t work on her.”
wooyoung paused. “we have poison?”
“yeah,” seonghwa muttered, rinsing the plate and setting it on the drying rack. “the blue ones in the cupboard.”
wooyoung’s face shifted slowly from confusion, to realisation, to then poorly concealed amusement.
“seonghwa..” he began carefully, facing him. “you know those are laxatives, right..?”
the sponge in seonghwa’s hand nearly slipped into the soapy water. “..what?”
“they’re laxatives,” wooyoung repeated. “i mean, they do look the same, but they’re laxatives.” 
seonghwa stared at him. “those are the only ones left- what happened to my poison?”
“we uh-” wooyoung hesitated, shifting on his feet. “we crushed it up and made paint..”
the air in the kitchen turned deathly still.
“you what?”
“i thought no one used it-!”
“i use it-! who makes paint with pills?” seonghwa snapped, his hands gripping the edges of the sink. he exhaled deeply, forcing himself to stay calm. “now i have to get more from that dealer.”
“uhh..” wooyoung cringed.
seonghwa turned to him, narrowing his eyes. “don’t tell me..”
wooyoung gulped, nodding slowly. “...san killed him.” 
WEEK 3 - TOUCH GRASS
the sound of your best friend’s voice echoed from your phone as you sat by the window, nibbling on the cream puff seonghwa gave you - again.
“i know this is TMI,” you said quietly. “but i’ve been shitting a lot lately. i don’t know if it's my period or lactose intolerance acting up.”
as you took another bite, the cream puff melted in your mouth, its sweetness making you temporarily forget about your bowel issues. 
rejecting it felt stupid - it was free. sure, it was weird that seonghwa kept giving you free food, but mrs earl trusted him, so why shouldn’t you?
still, you couldn’t quite figure him out. the man had a habit of glaring at you from across the bakery. were you that pretty? yes. but his glares didn’t feel like he was admiring you. they leaned more towards… anger.
your friend on the other end of the call burst out laughing - and you joined her for a moment. but before your friend could reply, your phone screen went black. 
“ugh, seriously?” you grumbled, tapping the screen repeatedly. with an annoyed sigh, you stuffed the dead phone into your bag.
with nothing else to do, your attention shifted. your eyes eventually landed on seonghwa, who was watching you with a blank face. 
it wouldn’t hurt to get to know him, right? after all, you see him everyday - and since your phone died, maybe it’s finally time to get some real human interaction in.
you gave him a wide smile. “hey, seonghwa.”
he blinked, visibly startled. “i uh-”
“-why don’t you sit with me?” you asked. “you’re not busy, are you?” 
for a moment, he seemed frozen. but somehow, you managed to convince him to sit across from you.
“so...” you began. “how are you?”
“good.”
you blinked. this wasn’t the riveting conversation you were hoping for.
unfazed, you continued. “how’s work been? stressful?”
he exhaled softly, shaking his head. “it’s fine. how about you? how’s work?”
“it’s alright,” you shrugged. “it’s gotten better since i started coming here. the vending machines at work are always broken.”
he nodded, his fingers drumming lightly on the table. “yeah- it’s even more convenient since it’s walking distance, right?”
you paused. 
“...how do you know that?”
seonghwa’s fingers froze mid-tap. 
“mrs earl,” he said finally. “she said a lot of her regulars work in the area.”
“oh, that makes sense,” you said, your suspicions fading quickly. you glanced out the window, your face softening. “i miss her..”
seonghwa let out a quiet sigh of relief, nodding as though he agreed with you.
but inside, his mind was screaming. that was way too close. 
focus.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
you kicked your shoes and slumped onto the couch, letting out a long sigh. the day had been.. something. your chat with seonghwa was pretty awkward, but more than anything, it made you miss mrs earl.
reaching for your phone, you dialed her number.
“‘____’! my favourite customer,” she greeted cheerfully, the background noise filled with chatter and clinking glasses.
“mrs earl!” you replied. “how are you? are the boys at your country club treating you well?”
“oh, you know how they are,” she giggled. “trying to impress me with golf and fancy dinners. it’s nice to relax for a change.”
you chuckled, sinking deeper into the couch. “that sounds perfect. you deserve it.”
the conversation flowed easily unlike the one earlier. you updated her on the usual - work and office gossip. but eventually, the topic drifted to the bakery.
“i hope the new boy hasn’t burned the place down,” mrs earl began.
“he’s actually a pretty good baker,” you said. “his cream puffs are unreal-”
you paused for a moment before you added. “though i have to say, they make my stomach hurt whenever i eat them.”
the line went quiet.
“...please elaborate,” mrs earl chuckled softly.
“i mean- i don’t know,” you shrugged, even though she couldn’t see it. “after i eat his pastries, my trips to the toilet are… traumatic.” you let out a small laugh. “but they’re so tasty, it’s worth the lactose intolerance.”
another silence followed, longer this time. you frowned slightly, shifting on the couch. 
“mrs earl?”
her voice finally came through, slower this time. “that’s.. impossible, my dear.”
“what do you mean?” you asked, sitting a little straighter.
“well,” she began carefully. “the bakery strictly uses oat milk. we don’t use any dairy products in our pastries.”
“...what?”
“the cream, the milk- everything is plant-based,” she continued. “it’s been that way for years. didn’t i tell you that when you first came in?”
you opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out.
mrs earl’s voice broke the silence again. “it could be something else. you’ve been stressed, haven’t you?”
“yeah..” you replied automatically, though your thoughts were far from the conversation.
“take care of yourself, honey,” she said gently. “i have to go, but call me again soon, okay?”
you nodded. “okay.. bye, mrs earl.”
“stay well, ‘____’.”
the call ended, leaving you sitting on the couch, phone in hand. for a long moment, you stared at the screen, her voice echoing in your head. 
the bakery strictly uses oat milk.
MONTH 1 - I WAS SPACING OUT
you sat at your regular table by the window, flipping through your notebook while sipping on your coffee.
you tapped your pencil against the table. yes, ‘traumatic’ was probably an exaggeration for your bathroom trips - but if there was no dairy in seonghwa’s cream puffs, then what was messing with your stomach?
you quickly shook your head, a sigh escaping your lips. ‘too weird to think about,’ you thought to yourself. whatever it was, the food was worth it.
you returned back to sketching, taking out your ruler to make straight lines. but as you drew, you couldn’t help but feel a certain someone’s eyes on you. 
“you’re staring again,” you said without looking up. 
a long pause settled over the bakery before you heard a, “..no, i wasn’t.”
you glanced up, a smile tugging at your lips. “wanna see what i’m working on?” 
and that was how seonghwa found himself unusually close to you, sitting beside you as you showed him your sketches - clean lines forming buildings, bridges and intricate floor plans. 
“you like drawing?” he asked.
“yeah,” you nodded, flipping to another page. “i wanted to be an architect.” 
seonghwa’s brow furrowed slightly. “then why aren’t you doing it?” 
you let out a laugh. “because i’m broke,” you said simply. “i’d rather work in an office than take out student loans.” 
you flipped through more sketches - some labelled with small notes in the margins while others had more detailed calculations. “it’s just a little hobby of mine.”
seonghwa’s eyes darted between you and the notebook. “this doesn’t look like a hobby,” he muttered.
you raised an eyebrow. “what does it look like then?”
“it looks like something you’re serious about.” 
you paused, blinking at him before leaning closer. “i’m serious about a lot of things, seonghwa- but that doesn’t mean i make a career out of them.”
the silence between you stretched as you flipped through the pages. the energy shifted to something you couldn’t quite explain - and as you tilted the notebook to show him a certain sketch, you realised that his eyes weren’t even on the paper anymore, they were on you. 
you sighed, closing the notebook. as you slipped it into your bag, you noticed how his eyes were still following you, sharp yet strangely soft with concern.
“don’t worry-” you said, smoothing out your clothes. “i’m perfectly content with where i am now.”
“are you?” he asked.
you met his eyes for a moment longer than usual. “yep,” you finished the last sip of your coffee. “how could i not be? free cream puffs and all, right?”
seonghwa didn’t respond.
“thanks for looking at my sketches,” you smiled, turning away. “hope i didn’t bother you.”
as he watched you walk out the door, he let out a slow sigh he didn’t realise he was holding, running a hand through his hair.
he stared up at the ceiling, leaning back into the chair. and for the first time in a long time, seonghwa felt sympathy. 
MONTH 2 - FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC 
over the past few weeks, you developed the habit of waving seonghwa over to join you whenever you stopped by the bakery. what started as polite small talk turned into embarrassing work stories you had.
this afternoon was no different. you sat across from him, coffee in one hand and a half-eaten cookie in the other, complaining about your friends’ latest questionable decision.
“yeah, she doesn’t listen to me,” you took a bite out of the cookie. “like- why fuck him if you hate him, y’know?”
behind his usual composed self, you caught the faintest twitch of seonghwa’s lips, followed by a sound so soft you almost missed it - a low chuckle.
you froze mid-bite. “did you just.. laugh?”
seonghwa raised an eyebrow. “yeah..?”
you leaned forward, eyes wide with excitement. “i’ve never seen you laugh before.”
“i’m sure you have,” he blinked.
“no, i would’ve remembered it,” you shook your head, grinning. “i like it.”
seonghwa choked, caught off guard. before he could even respond or process what you said, his phone buzzed in his apron pocket. he glanced at the screen and frowned.
“excuse me,” he said, heading to the small kitchen in the bakery, leaving you slightly confused.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
seonghwa pressed the phone to his ear. “what?” he asked.
“i got your poison ready,” san’s voice came through.
seonghwa nearly dropped his phone, swallowing the lump in his throat. “...really?”
“yeah- you wanted it extra strong, right?” san continued. “it took some tweaking, but it’s ready to go.”
the baker’s eyes darted to the half-open kitchen door. he could almost picture you sitting on the other side of it. “right… good.”
this was it. no more laxatives, no more delays.
it’s real now.
the thought of finishing the job left a strange knot in his chest - not dread exactly, but something close to it.
he wasn’t supposed to feel this way - no, he’s never felt this way. his work had always been detached. he never tried to make connections outside of the world of crime, didn’t deal with people who weren’t tied to his web of blood.
not until you came along.
you talked to him like he was.. normal. like he was a regular guy in a regular bakery.
he was finally seen as a person, not a killer. 
it was refreshing. 
“hello?” san’s voice broke him out of his thoughts.
“i uh-“ seonghwa cleared his throat, realising that he was silent for too long. “just leave the poison on my desk. i’ll get it later.
“sure,” san replied before adding, “but don’t overthink it, okay? just get it done.”
seonghwa hung up, staring at his phone for a moment before slipping it back into his pocket.
just get it done.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
from your seat, you only caught bits and pieces of seonghwa’s call. you didn’t mean to listen in, but your ears got carried away. 
his voice was low and hard to hear, muffled by the thin walls of the bakery - but one word stood out: poison.
your brows furrowed as you leaned back into your chair, the word echoing in your mind. poison? like food poisoning? did he get it? was that what you had?
you pushed those thoughts out of your mind. after all, what were the odds that your new friend seonghwa said something like ‘poison’ in a bakery of all places? you must’ve misheard.
the door creaked open as seonghwa stepped out, dusting his apron off as he walked back to the table.
“sorry about that,” he said, sitting across from you.
you tilted your head. “everything okay?”
“yeah,” he replied - but you swear you caught a hint of guilt in his eyes. “where were we?”
MONTH 3 - THIS ISN’T FUN ANYMORE
you wandered through the aisles that had shelves lined with tools, appliances and decorations. mrs earl invited you out for a little shopping spree, wanting to pick out a few things for her house.
as she inspected a stack of plates, something caught your attention - a small set of colourful forks, each with cute designs of fruits and animals.
“these are adorable,” you muttered as you picked it up.
mrs earl looked over your shoulder. “i didn’t know you liked these things.”
you shook your head, laughing softly. “oh- i do, but this is for seonghwa.”
“for seonghwa?” she raised an eyebrow.
“yeah,” you nodded. “he’s always giving me free food. i just thought it’d be nice to get him something.”
mrs earl’s lips curved into a knowing smile, though she said nothing. instead, she patted your shoulder and moved to examine another shelf.
over the past few weeks, seonghwa had become quite a good friend of yours. after all, you saw him everyday and you started to look forward to his presence whenever you stopped by.
and honestly? you’ve been wanting to pay him back for ages. all the free pastries, coffees and times he let you ramble on about work without looking annoyed. he needed.. compensation, if that was what it was called.
you sighed. what if he thought you were weird? well, it didn’t really matter - you wanted to do this.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the bakery was quiet and empty. seonghwa stood at the counter, his fingers gripping a small packet of crushed pills in one hand and the coffee you ordered in the other.
the poison felt heavier that it should, sinking into his palm as a reminder of what he was about to do. his mind spun, his thoughts fuzzy.
was this really happening?
he stared at the packet, his breathing shallow. it took him longer than usual to go near the wretched thing, let alone hold it. now, standing with the poison scarily close to your coffee, the reality set in.
your life was in his hands.
seonghwa’s chest tightened. he could just stop, throw the poison away, pour the coffee down the sink and pretend that none of this happened. after all, no one was forcing him to do this - except himself.
he sighed shakily, his fingers trembling as he began to shove the poison into his pocket.
but then the door swung open. you weren’t supposed to be back yet.
“hey seonghwa-!”
your voice startled him. his eyes snapped to the door as you walked in with paper bags, followed by mrs earl.
“i got you something-“ you said before your smile faltered, your eyes landing on the packet in his hand. “is that.. wait- is that drugs?”
seonghwa coughed, fully shoving it into his pocket quickly. “no- it’s not-”
your eyes narrowed - and before seonghwa could react, you went behind the counter and reached into his pocket, pulling out the packet.
“wait-”
your lips parted as you read the label. “...poison?” you breathed out.
the words hung in the air.
your eyes darted to the coffee cup still clutched in his other hand. it was unmistakably yours, your drink order obvious. and it didn’t take long for the pieces to click.
“are you-“ you gulped. “...are you trying to kill me?” you asked, your voice trembling.
seonghwa stood frozen, unable to respond. 
mrs earl, who was trailing behind, looked at the packet in your hand, then at seonghwa.
“what is the meaning of this?” she demanded. she stormed over to him, grabbing a nearby towel and smacking it across his shoulder. “i trusted you with my food! my bakery! and this is what you do?!”
seonghwa flinched but didn’t resist. his eyes, however, weren’t on mrs earl - they were on you.
you were completely still, the poison clutched in your hands. 
seonghwa opened his mouth to say something - anything, but the words died before they could form. you couldn’t even look at him, your eyes wide and unfocused.
ignoring how his chest tightened, he turned and dashed - leaving nothing but silence in the bakery.
mrs earl paced angrily, muttering curses under her breath. but you didn’t hear her - you couldn’t. your eyes remained fixed on the packet, your breathing heavy.
you sat down, throwing the poison far away from you. your heart pounded in your chest, each beat louder than the last. 
holy shit.
he was going to kill you. 
MONTH 4 - ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?
you leaned back in your seat, stretching your arms above your head. you powered down your computer, your office building quiet - working overtime seemed more tiring than usual.
you grabbed your bag, slinging it over your shoulder when your eyes landed on a small box tucked into the corner of your desk.
the fork set.
for weeks, you avoided looking at it. the sight of it was a reminder of the bakery - your now-dead friendship with seonghwa and the moment you realised he tried to kill you.
why did you even keep this?
you didn’t want to bring it home. you didn’t want to keep it at all. maybe it was time to throw it away and be done with it. 
you stepped out of your office building, the streets eerily silent. the only source of light you had were the streetlights that shined yellow light onto the pavement.
you clenched the fork set in your hands.
poison.
the word did circles around your mind, sending an uncomfortable feeling throughout your body. was that why your stomach always hurt after eating his pastries? was he actually trying to poison you the whole time?
the idea of it stung. you thought back to all the times you trusted him, to all the times you talked.
was any of it even real?
your thoughts were interrupted by the faint sight of movement you caught from the corner of your eye.
you stopped, glancing to the alley to your left. at first, it was hard to make out what you were seeing, the shadows dark. but then you froze.
a man stood there, holding a gun.
and someone else was infront of him, pinned against the wall.
your breath hitched when you realised who it was.
seonghwa.
his eyes locked onto yours, wide with fear as the gunman barked something you couldn’t hear. his face was bruised, blood smeared along his jaw and soaking his shirt.
you gulped.
this man tried to kill you. you could just.. walk away, pretend this didn’t happen.
you took a step back, everything in your body telling you to leave. but then, seonghwa’s trembling hand reached toward you, his fingers shaking as he silently pleaded.
shit.
you don’t know what compelled you - pity or something else entirely, but your grip tightened on the box in your hand. quickly, you opened it, grabbing the first fork you saw.
without thinking, you chucked it at the gunman.
the fork struck his shoulder with a dull thud, making him whip around in shock, pointing the gun at you.
your heart stopped. this was it.
but seonghwa worked fast.
grabbing the fork, he lunged forward with all the strength he had, driving it into the gunman’s neck.
the man stumbled, choking as he clawed at his throat, slumping to the ground.
seonghwa collapsed to his knees, panting heavily as the fork clattered from his hand to the pavement. blood dripped from his fingertips, pooling around him as he pressed a hand to his side, trying to stop his wound from bleeding.
“...thank you,” he managed to say, his voice hoarse.
you stared at him, your chest heaving. you stepped closer, looking down at his bloodied state. “damn it.”
seonghwa glanced up at you, his eyes filled with… gratitude? sincerity? relief? or was that desperation?
you sighed, shaking your head. “you’re lucky i’m a nice person.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
“i’m sorry-”
“don’t talk to me,” you cut him off, shoving a cold can of soda into his hand.
you brought seonghwa to your office, the only place you could think of where he wouldn’t be found - or bleed out. he sat in your coworker’s chair, guilt written all over his face.
with a heavy sigh, you sank into your own chair across from him, leaning back as you tried to catch your breath.
for what felt like an eternity, the two of you sat in silence, your eyes locked in an unspoken fight. dark red tissues piled up beside seonghwa as he pressed another one to the cut on his cheek, wincing.
you didn’t want to feel sorry for him. you didn’t want to care. but seeing him like this - injured, his clothes stained with the horrid look of blood, made it impossible to ignore the way your stomach twisted.
“...how did you end up like this?”
your words cracked, betraying the hurt and confusion you tried so so hard to bottle up.
“i-” began before stopping himself, his voice faltering. he pressed his lips into a thin line, looking away from you. 
EARLIER THAT DAY
“wha-? you can’t say no, seonghwa,” hongjoong snapped. “this is your job.”
seonghwa slouched deeper into the couch, arms crossed over his chest. his eyes followed his boss as he paced around the room. “i don’t want to go.”
“‘i don’t want to go’,” hongjoong mocked, stopping mid-step to glare at him. “i’m not asking you to go, i’m telling you.”
seonghwa stayed silent.
“come on,” hoongjoong ran a hand through his hair. “we got a tip they’re loitering around these streets. the least you could do is check it out.”
‘they’.
aka the drug cartel that had been bothering hongjoong and the group for months. even then, seonghwa shook his head, refusing his boss’s orders.
hongjoong let out a frustrated sigh. “you’ve been like this ever since you failed to kill that girl. you’re depressed- go outside.”
seonghwa’s head snapped up. “i’m not depressed,” he glared.
“right,” hongjoong chuckled dryly. “because moping and lazing around is normal behavior for you. wake up.”
seonghwa bit back a retort, his nails biting into his palms. he wasn’t depressed. he wasn’t.
was he?
a heavy silence settled over the room. sure, the last few weeks have been.. off. he hadn’t been sleeping well. his appetite was nonexistent. and everytime he thought about you, he felt an ache in his heart that he couldn’t quite shake.
it wasn’t depression. it was just a.. slump.
he was not depressed. 
seonghwa sighed, rolling his eyes. “whatever,” he muttered finally. he pushed himself up. “i better be paid good for this.”
PRESENT
seonghwa gulped, staring at the bruises on his arms. finally, he met your eyes, shifting uncomfortably. “...it’s just my job.”
you crossed your arms. “your job?”
he said nothing.
“seonghwa-” you began, leaning forward. “what kind of job leaves you looking like this?”
his shoulders stiffened, and for a moment - you thought he wouldn’t answer. but then he sighed, wiping his bloody hands on his shirt. 
“if i tell you,” he said. “you need to promise me something.”
you raised an eyebrow. “promise what?”
“that you won’t tell anyone.”
a dry laugh escaped your lips. “i’m not promising anything. spit it out.”
“...i’m in a gang.”
“wha-” you stared at him, your face blank for a second before you let out a snort and cackle. “you’re joking, right?”
but when he didn’t laugh, you froze.
“wait- you’re not joking?” you asked, your voice quieter.
he shook his head.
his words hit you like a wave. your mind spun, connecting the dots - the poison, his sketchy behaviour, the guilty look in his eyes - it all fell into place.
“...is that why you tried to kill me?” you asked after a long pause. “what did i do?”
“that’s..” seonghwa trailed off, looking away. “unrelated.”
you rolled your eyes. “of course it is.”
his face softened into something almost remorseful. “i don’t really know how to talk about this,” he said. “but i know i’m sorry.”
“you didn’t have to save me, but you did,” he leaned forward. “and i keep wondering why- because if it was the other way around, i don’t think i would’ve done the same.”
you raised your eyebrow.
“i’m sorry, really,” he said, quieter now. “i don’t know what else i can say, but i just.. i don’t want you to think i’m taking any of it lightly.”
you stared at him, surprised by how sincere he was. “seonghwa..”
“i know an apology won’t fix anything,” he said. “but i’ll do whatever it takes to make it right.”
“whatever it takes?” you asked, furrowing your brows. 
he nodded quickly.
you scoffed, leaning in closer, your eyes piercing his. “if you really mean that, prove it.”
“i will,’ he said immediately.
“…uhuh,” you looked him up and down before standing, grabbing your bag. “you can start by cleaning the blood off of my coworker’s chair.”
he let out a faint chuckle, though it was more self-deprecating than anything. before you walked away, you paused, turning back to him.
“seonghwa?”
“yeah?”
you stepped closer, grabbing his collar and pulling him towards you. “before you try anything stupid, remember this: i still have that poison of yours.”
MONTH 5 - WALK HIM LIKE A DOG
you had to admit - it was convenient having your own personal assistant, even if the circumstances were… complicated.
it wasn’t like you asked for this arrangement. seonghwa brought it upon himself, showing up whenever you called. 
printer jammed? he’d be there in ten minutes. out of pens? he’d have a pack delivered to your desk. of course you didn’t trust him with tasks involving your drinks or food, but even then - he made himself useful with other things.
over time, you got used to calling him for simple errands - and he never complained. 
it was most definitely awkward though, especially when he tried to make small talk with you.
“..your hair looks nice,” he said once as he stood by your desk.
“thanks,” you replied, not looking up from your screen.
a moment passed. you glanced over your shoulder, raising an eyebrow when you noticed he was still standing there. “...do you need something?”
he quickly shook his head, turning away as he muttered an apology.
you’d be lying if you said you didn’t find it amusing. as much as you hated to admit it, having him around wasn’t unbearable. 
as days turned into weeks, the distrust you held so tightly began to loosen its grip. it wasn’t like you forgot what he did, there were just moments when he seemed normal.
“you’re terrible at this,” you smirked, watching him struggle to assemble the new office chair you ordered.
he looked up at you. “i might be terrible, but at least i can read the instructions.”
you laughed.
but then you’d remember.
you’d remember the poison, the fact that this man tried to kill you for what seemed like no reason. 
and everything goes back to square one. 
MONTH 5.5 - T.G.I.F BY KATY PERRY
that friday, your coworkers insisted on dragging you out for a night at the club.
“let’s get wasted!” they said. “it’ll be fun!” they said.
that was probably a lie, but you gave in, changing your clothes before heading out.
neon lights shined erratically, painting the crowd in shifting shades of red, blue and green. bass-heavy music filled the club, so loud that it felt like waves went through your body. it was chaotic and packed to the brim with bodies swaying and stumbling.
it’d only been ten minutes and you already lost sight of your coworkers in the sea of people.
“shit,” you muttered under your breath, trying to find the exit. 
you pushed through drunk, clumsy dancers, finally spotting the door. but as you approached it, two towering men stepped infront of it, their shoulders forming an impenetrable wall.
“wha-?” you frowned, stopping. “i can’t leave?”
they didn’t respond.
“fine, whatever,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes. if you were going to be stuck here, might as well grab a drink.
you made your way to the bar, squeezing between a group of rowdy patrons to get the bartender’s attention. but just as you opened your mouth to order, you heard a voice behind you.
“hey, angel.”
you paused, glancing behind to see a man standing way too close. he was quite well-dressed, but an unsettling smirk settled on his face.
“excuse me?” you raised an eyebrow.
“can i buy you a drink?” he purred, leaning closer. “i think i’ll regret it if i don’t.”
you blinked. “no, it’s okay-“
“-two shots of tequila,” he called out to the bartender, cutting you off. 
you stared at him, barely processing his words before a shot glass was placed infront of you, the clear liquid weirdly fizzing. 
“thank you, but i don’t-“
“drink.”
before you could react, his hand was at the back of your head, tilting it back as he pressed the shot glass to your lips. the liquid burned as it slid down your throat - making you cough violently while the heat seared your chest. 
“wha- what is happening?” you mumbled. your limbs felt heavy and your head was spinning as your vision blurred. 
the man’s smirk deepened, his face inches from yours as he gripped your wrist. “let me ask you something, angel.”
you blinked, your thoughts sluggish and messy.
“what do you know about a man named park seonghwa?”
the name hit you in the face, your breath hitching. “i-”
his grip on your wrist tightened painfully. “answer.”
“he’s just a baker,” you said quickly.
the man chuckled darkly, the sound sending a chill down your spine. “are you sure?”
you nodded, unable to form a response.
he leaned closer, his breath hot against your ear. “then why did he poison my boss a few months ago?”
poison. 
that stupid stupid word haunting you again. 
the man laughed again, low and ominous. “you had a reaction there- you know something i don’t?”
you shook your head weakly, the motion making your dizziness worse. your knees buckled slightly, making you grip the edge of the sticky counter to steady yourself.
suddenly, the man’s phone buzzed in his pocket. he pulled it out, still holding you firmly in place.
“yeah,” he said after a moment. “i got his girlfriend right here.”
your eyes widened. “i’m not his girlfri-”
before you could finish, his hand clamped over your mouth, muffling your words.
“sleep,” he whispered, your world fading to black.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
seonghwa laid in bed, staring at the ceiling where his fan spun. with a sigh, he shifted under the covers, letting sleep take over him.
but just as he closed his eyes, his phone buzzed on the nightstand. his brows furrowed as he reached for it.
he swiped to answer it, not looking at the screen. “yes?”
“hey seonghwa,” a low, gruff voice was heard on the other end.
instantly, he was wide awake, sitting upright in the bed. his grip on the phone tightened. “...who is this?”
the voice chuckled. “i got your pretty little girlfriend right here- knocked out like a light.”
seonghwa paused. “...girlfriend?”
“yeah,” the man replied. “the chick you’re always hanging around. surprised you weren’t with her, thought i’d have to put up a fight.”
seonghwa’s blood turned cold as the realisation hit.
you.
he didn’t waste another second. he hung up immediately, throwing off the covers as he leapt out of bed, grabbing his jacket.
his footsteps echoed through the hideout as he stormed toward jongho’s room. he barged through the door without knocking, startling jongho who was hunched over his gaming setup.
jongho spun around in his chair. “what the hell-?”
“trace this number. now,” seonghwa shoved the phone into jongho’s hands.
jongho blinked. “i’m in the middle of a game.”
“i don’t care.”
jongho groaned, taking his headset off as he tapped the phone screen. “fine.”
seonghwa paced around the room like a caged animal - his fists clenching and unclenching as he tried to calm himself down. if they’d taken you, it was most definitely his fault. 
“got it,” jongho said after a while, typing something into his laptop. “you want me to track the phone too?”
“yes-” seonghwa snapped. “hurry.”
jongho glanced up at him, his brows furrowed. “what’s going on?”
“someone has her,” seonghwa muttered.
jongho’s eyes widened slightly, his fingers flying over the keyboard. “i thought you were over her?”
“wha- no,” seonghwa glared at him. “just find her.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
you slowly woke up, your head throbbing. your first attempt to open your eyes was met with darkness. no - something pressed against your face. a blindfold. 
your body felt stiff, the coarse bite of rope digging into your wrists and ankles. inhaling shakily, you realised something else: your mouth was muffled by a towel, trapping your cries before they could escape.
panic ran around your mind as you tried to make sense of your surroundings. the surface beneath you swayed gently - and you could hear the occasional creak of metal together with muffled voices. a vehicle. you were in a moving vehicle.
but out of nowhere, you heard a shout.
“shit!”
the vehicle swerved violently, the tires screeching against the asphalt with a sound sharp enough to make you wince. your body jerked with the motion, the restraints keeping you in place. tears spilled beneath your blindfold, your breaths shallow and rapid against the towel.
the screeching came to an abrupt stop, followed by the jarring slam of a door.
what came next was a symphony of screams and the sickening, wet sounds of a blade piercing flesh, bodies hitting the ground. you clenched your fists, trembling.
the next door opened. 
another scream. 
another stab.
then silence.
your chest heaved, your heart pounding so loudly it drowned out everything else. was this it? were you next?
then your blindfold slipped away.
your eyes fluttered open, the tears caught in your lashes making your eyelids feel heavy. when your vision eventually cleared, the first thing you saw was him.
seonghwa. his face splattered with blood, his dark eyes wide as he searched yours. his chest rose and fell as he tried to catch his breath.
“are you okay?” he asked, removing the towel from your mouth.
tears spilled down your cheeks faster now, your emotions overwhelming you in a way you’ve never felt before.
seonghwa’s face softened as he wiped your tears with his thumb, the blood on his hands smearing across your skin.
he moved to the ropes binding your wrists and ankles, his hands working quickly. 
“i’m sorry,” he said softly. “i’m so sorry- shit. i should’ve stayed away from you.”
the moment you were free, you threw your arms around him. he stiffened at first, caught off guard, but then his hands moved to your back.
your body shook against his as you cried. over his shoulder, you saw the man at the bar - his lifeless body crumpled on the ground, stab wounds dotting him.
“i’m so sorry,” seonghwa whispered again, his hand rubbing slow circles on your back. “this is all my fault.”
you pulled back slightly, your face still wet with tears. his hands stayed on your shoulders. “did they hurt you?” he asked softly.
you shook your head.
the vehicle fell into a heavy silence, the only sounds being your sniffling.
seonghwa gulped. “i’m sorry-”
“-thank you,” you said at the same time.
both of you froze, your words overlapping.
you chuckled, tears still clinging to your lashes.
“i’m really sorry,” he said once more, his voice cracking.
you studied him for a moment, taking in his disheveled hair, the blood on his skin and the exhaustion in his eyes. 
“...were you sleeping?” you asked, noticing the pajama shirt peeking out from under his jacket.
“yeah, i was about to.”
your eyes widened. “you saved me even though you were about to sleep?”
he raised an eyebrow. “was i not supposed to?” 
you stared at him, stunned. “...thank you.”
MONTH 6 - JUST DO IT
you’ve been staring at the text for hours, the words glowing on your phone screen.
let’s meet up.
seonghwa sent it to you that morning. no follow-up, no explanation, just those three words. and yet, they felt more heavy than you could even imagine.
what could you even say?
you tried to distract yourself, grabbing your laptop and scrolling through social media, but nothing held your attention for more than a second. your mind kept drifting back to the message.
your phone buzzed, the screen lighting up with another notification. not him. but you couldn’t stop yourself from looking at the text again.
let’s meet up.
‘he saved you-’ you reminded yourself. ‘-but he also tried to kill you.’
it should’ve been simple. black and white. a clear boundary between trust and mistrust. but nothing about seonghwa was simple.
when you thought about him, the first thing that came to mind wasn’t the poison or the lies. 
it was his hands, trembling as he untied you. 
it was his voice, breaking with regret as he apologised. 
it was the way he looked at you, like he didn’t deserve your forgiveness but was desperate for it anyway.
you hated it.
you hated that he saved you. hated how jumbled your feelings were.
and most of all, you hated how much time you spent thinking about him and his stupidly flawless face. 
you groaned, tossing your phone onto the couch. “this is ridiculous.”
this wasn’t what you needed right now. you grabbed your bag and went out the door. maybe grocery shopping would clear your head.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the store was crowded, filled with after-work shoppers. you walked aimlessly, picking up a few essentials here and there, but your mind was still on that text.
you stopped at the fridges, grabbing a drink. but as you turned to place it in your basket, you collided with someone. “watch it-” you began.
your words fell short when you realised you bumped into seonghwa, his phone in one hand and an awkward expression on his face. his eyes widened - and for a moment, neither of you spoke.
“hey,” he said finally.
you blinked, letting out a nervous chuckle. “hey,” you raised your free hand in a small wave.
“...can we talk?”
you nodded slowly. “yeah,” you put your drink into your basket. “what’s up?”
seonghwa glanced around, looking at the other shoppers nearby. “maybe not here.”
you nodded, heading to the checkout line without another word.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
you sat beside seonghwa on a wooden bench, your grocery bag resting at your feet. the both of you settled down in a park, a quieter and less busy place where you could actually breathe.
you reached for your drink, opening it. “thirsty?” you asked, holding it out to him.
he shook his head.
“i didn’t poison it,” you smirked.
seonghwa gave you a look, his ears turning pink. “you know i feel bad about that,” he muttered.
you chuckled softly, taking a sip. “sorry, sorry,” you said, turning to face him fully. “what did you want to talk about?”
he paused, hesitating as he fiddled with the edge of his jacket. “i just wanted to apologise,” he said finally.
you sighed setting the drink aside. “seonghwa- this is the hundredth time you��ve said that.”
“i know but-”
“i forgive you,” you said, your mouth moving faster than your mind.
his head snapped up, his eyes wide with disbelief. “what?”
“i forgive you,” you repeated, more confidently this time.
“...really?” he asked, completely shocked.
“yeah,” you shrugged. “you saved me. and it’s not like i can stay mad at you forever.”
seonghwa blinked. “you definitely can,” he said. “i wouldn’t blame you for it.”
silence fell between you, heavy but not uncomfortable. 
his fingers brushed against yours accidentally - and he instantly pulled his hand back, his face turning a shade of red. “oh my god- i’m so sorry-”
“seonghwa,” you interrupted, reaching for his hand and holding it gently - his fingers slightly calloused. “stop apologising.”
“i can’t help it,” he admitted quietly.
everything seemed to come to a standstill.
the distant sounds of birds chirping and leaves rustling faded into the background. your eyes locked, time pausing.
neither of you spoke.
slowly, almost unconsciously, you both leaned closer. the faint warmth of his breath brushed against your lips, uneven and nervous, mirroring your own.
you blinked, your breath caught in your throat when you realised just how close his face was to yours. “woah..” you whispered.
seonghwa immediately leaned back, clearing his throat. “sorry-”
before he could retreat any further, you reached out instinctively, your fingers curling around his jaw - his skin hot under your touch. “stop saying that,” you mumbled, your thumb brushing lightly against his cheek.
he froze, his eyes searching yours for something - permission, reassurance or maybe a blend of both.
you saw how he looked down at your lips for a split second, his adam’s apple bobbing. “...is this okay?” seonghwa breathed out shakily. 
you smiled softly, your thumb tracing slow circles on his jaw. “of course.”
the moment his lips pressed against yours, the world disappeared. 
his shoulders relaxed as he leaned into you, his hand rising to cup your cheek. his touch was careful, as if he was afraid of hurting you in some way.
your lips moved together in a soft, slow rhythm, the warmth of him spreading through you like a comforting fire. 
the sensation was intoxicating - and you found yourselves melting into each other’s touch. 
seonghwa’s breath hitched as he tilted his head slightly, deepening the kiss. his heart pounded against yours, a blush creeping up his neck, leaving him lightheaded.
when you finally pulled back, your lips were tingling. and before you could say anything, seonghwa leaned forward again, leaving a trail of kisses along your jawline.
“hey!”
a voice broke the moment like a needle popping a balloon. both of you jumped, your heads snapping toward the sound.
a parent stood not too far away, their hands clamped over their child’s eyes. “please do this at home or something,” they said, glaring at the two of you before walking away quickly.
you and seonghwa exchanged a look, your cheeks flushing as you tried to stifle your laughter.
“yeah,” he said, looking into your eyes, then at your lips. “let’s do this somewhere else.”
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series taglist [OPEN] - @hanoishere @scuzmunkie @sinfullygay @arusio @midnightrebel1028 @neemaxx @seungminsrighthand @arilevenatz @ateezswonderland @beabatiny @lemirabitur @sunnyhokyu @frzzenfrxg @cylovesmg @txtsoobean @seonghwasslytherin @sundaybossanova @sweetinsaniiity @cybrnaya @choisanchwego @mrskill2 @devilzliaison @scary-thingz @gaonashi @jonghosbrainrot @mintchocoyum
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BONUS SCENE - CUE THE MARIACHI BAND
you stirred awake to the faint aroma of something tasty wafting through the air. groggily, you rubbed your eyes open, only to find seonghwa standing by the bed, a tray in his hands.
“happy anniversary,” he said softly, his lips curving into a smile.
you pushed yourself up on the pillows, your eyes wide with surprise as you took in the tray - a plate of freshly baked bread and scrambled eggs.
“thank you..” you mumbled, half-asleep but touched by the gesture.
seonghwa stepped closer, carefully placing the tray on your lap. he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead. “eat quickly,” he said with a hint of excitement. “i got you something.”
you raised an eyebrow. “i thought we said no gifts this year.”
he shrugged, smirking. “i lied.”
you rolled your eyes, though you couldn’t stop a smile from forming on your lips. you grabbed a piece of bread and started eating. it was perfect, just like everything he made.
when you were finished, you slid out of bed, wrapping your cardigan tighter around yourself. you walked to where seonghwa was, sitting next to him.
“seonghwa,” you began. “we agreed- no gifts.”
“i know,” he said, reaching for something on the coffee table. “but i changed my mind.”
your eyes landed on the envelope in his hands. you stared at it as he handed it to you, your brows furrowing slightly. “what’s this?” you asked, taking it hesitantly.
“open it.”
sliding your finger under the seal, you pulled out a letter. as your eyes skimmed the words, your jaw dropped.
“...is this-?”
“yeah.”
“you paid for my school?!” you exclaimed in disbelief.
he nodded. “you wanted to be an architect, right?”
“i do but..” you looked at him in shock, the letter trembling in your hands. “isn’t it expensive?”
“so?” he leaned closer to you, pulling you gently towards him.
your lips parted, trying to form words. “but you paid in full-”
“it doesn’t matter,” he cut you off softly, pecking your cheek. “i wanted to do it. for you.”
you searched his eyes, completely stunned. he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a tender kiss. 
when you eventually pulled away, he didn’t let you go fully. instead, he smiled, brushing a strand of hair away from your face before pressing a gentle kiss to your temple. “happy anniversary.”
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portalhan · 2 months ago
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⠀ꔫ˚ ༝ ◌ ⌒⌒ three strikes !
↳ jeongin swears on his life that he's seen something odd between you and felix... exactly three times, in fact, but he needs more concrete proof...
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PAIRING: felix lee x gn!reader
FORMAT: one shot
GENRE: college au, friends to lovers, fluff, jeongin third wheeling...
WARNINGS: brief mentions of food and being sick (just the flu bug nothing huge)
WORD COUNT: 2.8k
FAE'S NOTES: this is just a little bit half-assed... idk if i have much faith in this and i believe i can do better than this but i'm gonna post it anyway for you guys! please let me know if you have any feedback, my writing muscles have basically atrophied and i need to find my rhythm again TT
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jeongin doesn't usually second-guess his closest friends like this, but something has changed. he knows you and felix well enough to know at least that.
you have always been hard to read. you're an independent, reliable sort of person, not outwardly emotional nor needlessly arrogant either—you tend to show your love for your friends through small, quiet gestures. felix, on the other hand, is someone who wears his heart on his sleeve—almost to a fault. always baking extra brownies to gift people, always going the extra mile, always looking on the bright side, even in the darkest of situations. he is as fragile as he is affectionate.
yes, affectionate. that's the word he's been looking for to describe the changes in your friendship with felix. you've been more affectionate. jeongin has always chalked it up to felix's own proclivities rubbing off on you given the sheer amount of time you spend together, but now... he's not so sure it's that simple. there have been three strikes jeongin has kept score of so far.
STRIKE #1
jeongin remembers it was a tuesday, because that's the only day of the week where all three of you shared classes. you would always sit in a row near the back of the class. he has made it a point to memorise both yours and felix's timetables this semester—as do the both of you with him—so he knows you don't usually have prior arrangements before coming to campus. you've always had a tradition of meeting in the lobby before walking to class together as a result.
so, when his phone pings with a message from you saying 'sorry innie, we're gonna be a bit late! pls go to class first, just save us seats', he is immediately struck with confusion. what did you mean, "we"? felix, uncharacteristically, hasn't said a word and it's already 5 minutes shy from when class starts. he always arrives at least 10 minutes before. how strange, jeongin thinks to himself as he trudges up the stairs to class, incredibly unfamiliar with the circumstance of having to do so on his own for the first time. he just brushes the nagging suspicion off, telling himself it was probably because of some public transport situation that's delayed you both—not something entirely uncommon.
it's about 15 minutes into the class before he sees you. the second he spots felix and you stumbling through the doors, profusely apologising to the professor for your tardiness, though, is when the same sensation of suspicion comes back. as you and felix shuffle to make their way to the seats jeongin saved for you, he can't help but notice your attire. you're wearing an oversized black shirt with some graphic of an anime printed on. jeongin's eyes squint as he stares at it, assuming it must have been a new purchase of yours. but he swears he's seen it before.
when you and felix take your seats and the professors picks up where she left off, felix turns to jeongin and apologises for being late. "we're really sorry jeongin, we owe you one," he quips, before he fishes his laptop out of his bag. the younger boy just shrugs it off as no big deal. plus, he had something else on his mind to worry about than harp on the two of you being late to class.
the dots quickly connect a few moments later in jeongin's head. felix has a shirt just like the one you're wearing. he swears he's seen him wearing it before, just last week when the three of you had gone out for dinner. it's been a shirt of his for years now, so worn down by so many uses that it has bleach stains on the sleeves, despite how much care felix puts into his clothing.
jeongin leans back in his chair and slowly, subtly pushes it back. he steals a glance at your side profile, thankfully without either you or felix noticing. there they were: bleach stains on the sleeves. upon further inspection, the shirt you were wearing looks way too worn out to be a new shirt—he concludes it must be felix's. but why would you wear felix's dank shirt to begin with? it would be weird to ask if that's his shirt you were wearing, so he decides to keep his silence for now.
STRIKE #2
this time, it was jeongin's turn to be late. the three of you had planned a picnic to celebrate the end of the gruelling semester—an idea felix suggested. he wanted it to be a potluck, so the each of you planned to bring something of your own making along.
jeongin wanted to go all out with his: he wanted to bake cupcakes, something felix had recently taught him how to. he wanted to show you his latest endeavours, baked fresh, but he didn't expect it to go sideways so last minute. he ended up showing up almost half an hour late, hair sticking to his forehead from all the sweat and cupcake frosting smeared all over the tupperware he placed them in out of haste.
when he finally spots the two of you amid the grass field at the park, he notices something... odd. he stops in his tracks to catch his breath and squints his eyes to get a better look. if he didn't know any better, he'd have thought you two were... holding hands? the sun was glaring directly in his face, obscuring his vision, so jeongin couldn't be 100% sure. but what he does know is that your figures were so close to each other they were practically shoulder-to-shoulder. this isn't exactly beyond felix, who is notorious for his habits of physical affection. but it is most certainly out of character for you, as someone who prefers to keep most people at an arm's length.
jeongin shrugs it off. he guesses felix nor he would be considered "most people". perhaps it was a trick of the light. he also doesn't have good enough reason to find it entirely strange—perhaps felix had gotten through to you in that regard. he had bigger things to worry about: your dinner getting cold.
STRIKE #3
the legitimacy of the third time is still up for debate, jeongin surmises. this time it wasn't your behaviour around each other, instead more so about how felix in particular reacted.
this happened over summer break. he remembers the sun being more unrelenting than ever—40 degrees celsius to be exact, he saw on the news—so you three had just decided to hang out in your bedroom, where the air conditioning is the coolest and crispiest (according to you). jeongin vividly recalls you lying on your stomach atop your bed, while the two boys were sprawled on the floor. that is, the carpet that laid over the spot where they would usually sprawl on the floor.
it was one of those 'parallel play' days, as you liked to call them. not necessarily doing things together, but doing separate things in the presence of each other, you said one time. felix was busy on his switch playing some pokemon game, you were scrolling on your phone and jeongin was just seconds away from drifting off to sleep on felix's lap.
it's been silent for, what, almost two hours now? but you end up breaking it first. "woah," you suddenly exclaimed, brows furrowing as you read something on your screen. "do you guys remember seungmin? from calculus?"
jeongin does not move an inch aside from nodding his head, and felix just lets out a little "yeah?" though his eyes were never once peeled from the console screen.
"i think he just asked me out," you tell them, bewildered.
this, of course, elicits reactions of surprise from jeongin and felix. the former lifts himself and sits up to ask details, while the other just turns the switch off—did he even save his progress on the game?—and sits there in silence as he silently watches you and jeongin discuss your classmate's... proposition. jeongin makes a playful jab at how you could have given him the wrong idea by flirting with him, which you immediately shut down. "i've never done anything suggestive to him, i swear!" you exclaimed in full defense.
seungmin has only ever made conversation with you once or twice in class, jeongin recalls. you also never really put in the effort to get to know your other classmates if jeongin and felix were in the same classes. jeongin makes a passing comment about how seungmin could pass as your type (if you squint hard enough), but it falls on deaf ears when you and felix meet each other's gazes.
"you're gonna tell him no, right?" felix suddenly chimes in after moments of prolonged silence, raspy voice cracking just a little. jeongin snaps his head to turn and look at his friend, head tilted and brow lifted. you give felix a look jeongin cannot quite describe, and chuckle with a soft smile as you nod. "of course i'm gonna say no," you assure him. he lets out a very heavy sigh of relief, but none of this goes unnoticed by jeongin.
this is very weird, jeongin remembers thinking. you have always been receptive to potential love interests, even if they weren't necessarily people you'd normally be into. so why are you so sure now that you'd reject seungmin without even giving him a chance?
on that note, what's it to felix who asks you out? why does he have a say? plus, he could've sworn he detected some semblance of... jealousy in his question. but he supposes that could be normal considering all three of you are so used to spending time with each other. jeongin does admit to himself that he'd feel lonely if you were to be whisked away by some stranger out of nowhere. it wouldn't be the same.
jeongin has theories, maybe even concepts of a theory, but no concrete enough proof for confrontation—so far. it looks like he has to wait till he does before he can address the massive elephant in the room.
FINAL STRIKE
it finally happens when he decides to stop by your apartment with take-out. you had told your friends about falling sick the night before—alas, you have caught the flu bug. they were just textbook symptoms like a low-grade fever, sore throat and a runny nose, nothing to worry about in particular, you told them. but jeongin just so happens to pass by your neighbourhood on his usual route home from work, so he decides to drop in with some chicken soup for you as a small surprise. you had already been texting the group chat the entire day about how exhausted you were to make yourself a half-decent dinner, so jeongin thought this would be a nice way to take care of his friend.
he knocks on your door multiple times to no response. maybe you're sleeping? he looks around the potted plants sitting outside your door and lifts the snake plant up, grabbing the rusted spare key tucked away from prying eyes just underneath. he quickly and quietly unlocks the front door and lets himself in. i'll just go in, check on y/n and put this soup on the table, he tells himself as he enters. maybe text you to let you know he got you dinner.
that is, until a warm aroma of what he believes to be fresh bolognese wafts to where he is at the front door. he hears the distant clanging of pots and pans coming from the kitchen, and—strangest of all—he hears... conversation? he can definitely hear you talking and even giggling, but he can't quite make out who the other person was. he's about 99% sure there was someone else in here, but could it be just a phone call? he sneaks down the hallway to the kitchen, the noises getting clearer as he inches closer. when he sticks his head out from a blind corner to peek into the kitchen, he sees it: felix plating a fresh bowl of spaghetti while you're sitting on the dining table engaged in idle chatter. a lump catches in his throat—what is felix doing here? and most importantly, why didn't he know of this? he felt momentarily betrayed.
jeongin just stands there in silence, unsure of how to confront you, while you and felix continue chatting. it's only when felix sets down two plates of pasta and goes in to plant a peck on your cheek does jeongin yelp in shock, which frightens all three of you.
felix squints his eyes, which widen in utter disbelief when he recognises the familiar facade lurking by the corridor. "jeong...in?" he asks, voice trembling a little from disbelief. when he says jeongin's name, you shoot him a similar look, but this one is more panicked and afraid. jeongin awkwardly steps out within view, but he puts a hand up to cover his mouth to prevent himself from screaming. he raises the other arm to point an accusatory finger at the both of you. you swear you just heard felix gulp next to you.
"i..." jeongin sputters. "i knew it! i knew something was going on between you two idiots!"
the verbalisation of his revelation is what completely opens the floodgates, causing the entire place to erupt in complete and utter chaos. jeongin paces back and forth with the chicken soup still dangling from his fingers as he rants about how he's caught you doing "weird stuff" a couple of times but couldn't have known, about how he's been feeling a little left out recently, how you have been looking at felix funny sometimes. meanwhile, felix just begins to talk over him with near-equal (if not more) amounts of sheer panic and distress, reaching out to him to get him to calm down while explaining that this wasn't how they had intended for him to find out.
you, crippled by the shock from jeongin's unexpected appearance, just sit there, unable to do much of anything what with your flu, just silently watching felix and jeongin form a panic attack circle jerk in your own house.
"enough!" jeongin raises his voice, which immediately shuts felix up. jeong has never raised his voice. you shoot felix a nervous look.
"i thought we were best friends," jeongin utters, the slightest hint of melancholy lacing his voice. he looks offended. you've never seen him look this offended, not even when he was accused of academic misconduct that one time. "i'm happy for you, ecstatic even! i swear i am, but really? why would you keep this for me for so long?"
you decide you should talk to him—felix is very clearly out of his depth when it comes to handling intense situations like this and he's only making jeongin feel worse with all the jabbering. you stand up from your seat on the table and walk over to him, taking your hands in his.
"i'm sorry, jeongin. we... we weren't entirely sure of how we were gonna do this," you tell him, almost in a whisper.
felix scratches the back of his neck, avoiding any and all eye contact with either of you. "we wanted to keep it quiet," he admits. "at first, at least."
you nod in agreement, and turn back to look at jeongin. "you were going to be the first person we would break the news to. not even our own parents, i swear," you divulge, while you spot felix in the corner of your eye making a silent crossed hearts gesture to double down on his sincerity. jeongin's once-tense features start to ease up a bit, but not entirely. "you are our best friend. we never want you to feel like this. we're sorry," you assure him, before pulling him into a bear hug. you feel felix join from behind you to make it a group hug.
"i don't care what you guys have going on, but don't keep any more secrets from me. got it?" your friend huffs after you all pull back, feigning some sort of authority. felix chuckles at how ridiculous he sounds—being the youngest of the three, the tone just sounds alien when it comes from him. "we would never," felix tells him, reaching out to give jeongin a firm pat on the back. "i think y/n might like you more than me anyway, they're always going, 'we should call jeongin! we should send him a photo! we should—"
your palm slaps against the lower half of your boyfriend's face in protest. "we might be dating but you're on thin ice," you glare at him, before he raises both hands to surrender.
jeongin jovially chimes in to break the tension: "can i just say, i've always felt like you'd get along. aren't you glad i introduced you to each other? you wouldn't be a thing if it weren't for me, ya know." felix and you just huff in response—he can have this.
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7s3ven · 3 months ago
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SINGLE DAD! X BABYSITTER! READER HAS ME FROTHING OMGG. Even better when the rest of TF 141 is involved
part 1 | part 2 (coming soon - rest of tf 141 introduced)
master list
MDNI 18+
Warnings: big age gap, babysitter! reader, reader is in medical school (but still legal guys)
You told yourself it was just a temporary summer job, something to fill your pockets over the Summer break as you moved into another year of university. Medical bills were not easy to pay off and your old job that paid the bare minimum did not help you in the least. All it taught you was that you had a nasty uppercut (from the time you actually hit someone and got fired).
So, you found yourself standing in front of John Price’s house. You stared up at the tall building, brows raised in surprise. He had understated how big his house was… it even had a garden and a pool. You may as well consider it a mansion.
You quickly rang the doorbell, smoothening out your tight blouse. Your much more appropriate one was in the wash so you prayed whoever answered the door did not notice.
It was a tall middle-aged who greeted you, beard cleanly trimmed and… a hat on his head. “Y/N L/N?” He asked you. You swiftly nodded, softly smiling when he stepped aside.
“So, medical school, huh? Training to become a doctor?” He asks as he brews you a cup of tea while you read over his terms and conditions.
“A surgeon, sir. Not much better, though.” You offer him another smile, hoping to ease the awkward tension.
“Right. Next time I need surgery, I’ll call you up.” He takes a sip from your tea, which you notice but you say nothing. “Just checkin’ the temperature. Wouldn’t want ya to burn yourself.” He hands you the mug, his fingers lingering on your skin for a moment too long.
“I assume this is only a quick job for you? Just away to gain a bit of money to pay those student fees off?”
Your cheeks heat up in embarrassment as you nod. “Yes, sir. I know I should have clarified it but I’m a little desperate at this point. Besides, no retail places want to hire me… after I hit someone.”
Your words intrigued him. He let out a low chuckle as he sat across from you. “Now I’m interested.”
“Well… there’s not much to it… a guy kept staring at my chest. He said some vulgar stuff and next thing I knew, I was punching him.”
Price shrugs, leaning back in his seat. “The lad was askin’ for it. So, what do you think about the job? You’ll honestly be a glorified babysitter. Just do some cleaning and cookin’ here and there and make my baby happy and you’ll get a nice pay check every week.”
It all happened in a blur. You agreed to the job and weeks later, you found yourself at Price’s house more than your apartment. You hadn’t stepped foot into your apartment since two days ago, Price generously allowing you to use one of the guest rooms.
“Lila has a sleepover tomorrow.” Price mentions as you’re reading the instructions on how to make cookies for Lila’s bake sale.
Based on the cooking skills you had seen from Price, you doubted he could bake very well. In fact, all he could cook was steak, which was general knowledge for dads.
“I can drop her off if needed.” You offer while opening the packet of flour only for it to explode in your face. You smacked your lips together, grimacing. “Not a word.” You mutter to Price who’s chuckling under his breath.
“Wasn’t gon’ a say anything, love.” He helps wipe the flour dust off your face, still grinning in amusement.
In all honesty, your relationship with Price felt a little too domesticated, especially right now as you wore a frilly apron he had bought just for you.
“Your skirt’s too short, by the way.” Price grumbles, attempting to tug it down. “You sure no creeps stared at you on your way ‘ere? Wouldn’t want ya in danger.”
You push his hands away from your hips. “Even if people were staring, I’ll just punch them.”
You had tried to maintain a professional relationship with your boss but it was hard when he carelessly manhandled you and treated you like his wife rather than his daughter’s babysitter.
And all professional behaviour came crashing down when he unexpectedly stood behind you as you whisked the cookie batter.
“You look like a coke addict.” Price jokes, referring to the flour that still stained your face. “Like you got it everywhere but up your nose.”
“I can assure you, sir, I have never tried coke unless my friend daring me to snort sherbet counts.”
Price grins at your biting remark, his heavy hands falling to your waist. “Yeah? Heard it doesn’t feel too good with sherbet.”
“Not in the slightest.”
His hands trail dangerously low but you don’t have the courage to ask him to stop… nor do you really want him too. He seems to sense your willingness as he rests his face in the crook of your neck, body pressed up tightly against yours.
You feel more like his spoiled wife than a medical student just trying to pay her bills.
“You’re pretty, ya know that? Surprised you don’ have a boyfriend… or girlfriend. Or partner. Dunno what your label is.”
With shaking hands, you place the bowl filled with cookie batter to the side, afraid you’ll only spill it.
“Never met a woman as soft as you… most think I chased Lila’s mother away. But nah. Her mother ran off, leavin’ me with a baby. Not that I’m complaining, I love Lila… and without her, I wouldn’ have met you.”
You’re reduced to listening to Price’s words, stuck between his larger frame and the marbled kitchen counter.
“Sir.” You whisper but it reaches his keen ears. Everything after that is a distorted blur and you find yourself bent over the counter, clad in nothing but the apron, with Price right behind you.
Price was a mystery to you. How could a man be turned on by something as simple as an apron? Though, he was a single dad so it made sense.
Price is muttering praises in your ears as your knees tremble, threatening to buckle. You never imagined you’d be in your employer’s kitchen, having your back blown out by the man himself.
His hands were hungrily climbing your body, gripping every bit of exposed skin he could find. If it wasn’t for him holding you upright, you would have toppled to the ground in a heartbeat.
You feel Price lift a hand to grip your hair, tugging at your locks. He’s in a desperate stupor but you’re not any better, pushing back your hips to meet his harsh thrusts.
“Gon’ a fill ya up. Give you a baby of yer own. Fuck… be so pretty just like you. My perfect little wife.” He grunts in your ear. You have no energy to correct him; that you’re not actually his wife but you’d have no complaints if he bought you a ring.
If anything, his words spur you on more.
Your chest is heaving by the time you near your release. You’re whining like a damn dog, high pitched noises slipping past your saliva-slicked lips. And you only grow in volume as Price speeds up, pressing his body against your back.
He’s older than you, that’s a fact you knew from the start, but he’s definitely more experienced as well. His well thought out words have the desired effect on you as the coil in your stomach snaps.
Your fluids drip down your exposed legs, hitting the tiles kitchen ground in thick droplets. You hear Price swear under his breath, quickly pulling out and staining your back white.
He doesn’t say anything for a moment as he rests his forehead on your shoulder. Then he leads you towards his bathroom, ushering you inside and handing you a spare set of clothes.
“Imma place your old ones in the washing, yeah?” He mutters, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek before leaving you to wash off.
You sit on the shower floor for a good five minutes, replaying the moment in your head. When you finally cleanse yourself of sweat, you slip Price’s shirt over your head, inhaling the intoxicating smell of his cologne. It was the one you liked too.
His clothes engulfed you as you stumbled back into the kitchen, hobbling a little.
“I guess I’ll… get going then.” You murmur, fidgeting with your hands.
Price reaches out a hand to brush a strand of hair away from your face. Then he nods. “See you tomorrow night, lovie.”
Right, you still had to finish those cookies and pick up your clothes.
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shineemoon · 3 months ago
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241113 Taemin bbl live (© trans: xtmtaemin)
During our trainee days, Jonghyun hyung and I often go home together. After we’re done with training, he’ll say ‘let’s go’ and I was like ‘ok hyung!’, or he’ll say ‘Taemin let’s practice some more!’ and I’ll also go ‘yes hyung’. We’re always practicing together and leave together. If we go to Dongdaemun together, hyung oftens buy me delicious food. Infinite refill fishcakes~ the soup~ you can get it for 1000won. Back then there are lots of street stalls on the streets back then. It’s really delicious in winter. Wearing our school uniforms, eating while it’s steamy hot~ we sometimes have gamjatang too. On autumn, we ate bungeopang (carp shaped bread) and pulbang (in cast baked bread) and we often said like ‘let’s do this together’ ‘let’s make this happen together’. We had lots of dreams. Back then, there’s this show called ‘Yashimmanman’, back then there are shows like x-man and Yashimmanman. I think I’m talking about this for the first time. After eating bungeopang, we encountered really scary guys. We are really young back then and those hyungs look really scary. We happened to lock eyes and the scary guys were like ‘hey come here!’, I am so flustered but (Jonghyun) hyung wasn’t even bothered and is standing proudly. Hyung was like ‘what’s with you?’. It seems as we can just pass by them but we just had to pass by a dark alley and there are 3 more big guys there. We (Jonghyun hyung and I) locked eyes and thought ‘we’re in deep trouble, do we just run away?’ We got lots of our stuffs stolen, like ipod? Mp3? We don’t even have that much money. I almost got my ipod stolen, the guys were like ‘let me see! give it to me!’ and then Jonghyun hyung prevents it from happening. Back then, shoes are kinda valuable, the Nike Air Force shoes. Jonghyun hyung said ‘take this instead and don’t touch the younger ones’ belongings’ and then went home barefooted. To us, that was such a frightening moment back then. Well at least it is to me since we are so young. As I walk home with hyung who’s barefooted, I spoke informally ‘hyung, what do we do? what are we going to do?’ Jonghyun hyung just laughed loudly and said ‘it’s ok! my house is close HAHAHA let’s talk about this when we appeared on Yashimmanman, we got one story to tell now!’ He laughed real hard as he said it. The bottom of his feet must be wet since it was also raining then and the floor is wet. As I remember, hyung still needs to walk and hike a distance, he protected me and went home, hahahoho (laugh) and then talked about it again as we meet the next day in the practice room. There’s this kind of memory too. It’s interesting right? Did I talk about it for the first time? Or have you heard of this before? Anyways, that’s that. He’s a mate who always goes home together with me.
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wonkixo · 22 days ago
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FOOD CRITICS ⎯ ENHYPEN MAKNAE LINE (k. sunoo, y. jungwon, n. riki)
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SYNOPSIS in which they fall down bad into the love at first sight trope when all they wanted was to film content and eat good food.
PAIRING youtuber! enhypen maknae line x food industry worker! female reader
GENRE/WARNING(S) strangers to lovers, headcanons, fluff, bits of crack, a few profanities, slight cliffhanger in riki's but happy ending!
AUTHOR'S NOTE i think i got a lil carried away with riki's heh... yet i ran out of ideas to make this an ot7 work sorry :,) but i hope you all enjoy!
likes, reblogs, and any feedback are always appreciated <3
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⎯ KIM SUNOO
sunoo would be the cutest youtuber on the web
popular for his adorable mukbangs and food reviews, he was invited to try out working at a trending café for a day
"welcome back to my channel, everyone! today, we were invited to get a behind the scenes look inside of one of seoul's most popular cafés to date, tea bloom!"
there was not an ounce of nervousness in this cutie's body, he was so excited to try out a domestic job (due to its stark contrast with his influencer life)
but when he saw you and learned that you would be his mentor for the day, oh boy he was thrilled
"everyone, meet yn! she is my lovely mentor for the day, she will be guiding and teaching me the ins and outs of working at tea bloom!" "i'm so excited to work with you, sunoo! i've been a fan of yours for ages~"
when you revealed you were a fan of his, the blush that crept upon his fluffy cheeks was evident
the first thing you decided to teach sunoo was how to make a proper iced matcha latte
admittedly this choice was self-indulgent due to your love for matcha
but you also assumed this would be an easy start for someone who was new to the kitchen
sunoo did wonderful as expected
when you finished making your matchas, you two did a taste test of each other's
sunoo already knew yours would be delicious, seeing as your work is what made the café so popular
but when you got around to drink his matcha, you were stunned to say the least
"sunoo, you're such a natural! are you sure you were not a barista before becoming a youtuber?" "oh you're just saying that..." "SUNOO I'M SO SERIOUS."
you decided to also have sunoo watch you bake one of your most popular pastries, french macarons
sunoo was determined to help you in whatever way he could
but he was well aware of how difficult it was to bake french macarons
and he didn't want to mess up your flow
so he let you do your thing while he admired watched you :)
you of course let him take part in the tastings
and encouraged him to copy what you did as best as he could
"don't be shy, sun! you got this, just follow what i do as best you can and don't be afraid of messing up!"
you transitioning from calling him sunoo to sun btw...
the fans were biting their fists at how adorable you two were
at the end of the day, you and sunoo were able to create two perfect batches of french macarons (that sold out in less than an hour may i add)
despite sunoo being known for his soft aura on his channel, fans were quick to note his sweet and comfortable nature around you
not only was sunoo so eager to learn from you, but he was eager to take care of you as well
had to cut a slice of cake? you didn't lift a finger when sunoo was in the kitchen with you, especially near a sharp object
had to grab something out of the oven? sunoo already had his mittens on and was gently pushing you to the side to prevent you from getting burned
had to clean up a drink a customer accidentally spilled? sunoo was already rushing his way over with a mop before you could blink twice
it was as if he owned the cafe and he was the one mentoring you
"guys... i'm sorry but i may be stealing sun away from the spotlight and hire him to work for me instead." "you know yn, i wouldn't mind that." "i wouldn't mind your presence everyday either, sun."
there was clear chemistry between the both of you
the cuteness aggression was insane
after the video was posted, your café gained so many new customers!
ironically enough, your new customers were adamant on trying your french macarons & iced matcha lattes
some innocent middle schoolers who often came by your café after school even asked if you and sunoo were dating
flattered, you would innocently giggle and deny their assumptions
however, unbeknownst to all sunoo's viewers, you two talked every day following your day together
when you two weren't working, you guys spoke so much actually
you would come home from your shift at the café to facetime the cutie pie while he attempted to bake a red velvet cake himself
he would come home from a brand event to facetime and binge watch all versions of love island together
if your schedules aligned, you guys would visit each other's apartments and just enjoy one another's company (with no cameras or customers in sight)
you two were even planning to create a part 2 to your collab! perhaps another "work with me" video...
sunoo: hey ynie!! i hope your shift is going well:) sunoo: hypothetically asking though (forgive me for not asking irl) sunoo: but what would you say if i asked you out for dinner after your shift? yn: hehe hiii my sunny boy yn: im on my break rn but i clock out at 5 today <3 yn: i'll see you tonighttt
or perhaps a "get ready with me for a date!" video :)
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⎯ YANG JUNGWON
jungwon was a popular youtuber for filming silly videos purely for entertainment and documentation of his life
whether it be challenges with his friends, deep dive in conspiracy theories, or simple vlogs of his days
on this particular day, he was filming a drive-thru telepathy challenge with heeseung (which they miserably failed btw)
jungwon sat at the drive-thru speaker with no thought behind those boba eyes and cat-like features
"hello, welcome to [insert fast food restaurant here]! what could i get started for you?" "oh yeah um... what do you recommend?"
the speaker recommended him a plain ol' chicken sandwich with a side of fries and a large drink
nothing can go wrong with that, right?
he simply agreed to your coworker's recommendation and paid for his order
jungwon waited as there were cars lined up before him, noticing how heeseung ahead of him managed to order 3 different bags worth of food
jungwon subtly also notices you giving his friend his respective order, where the camera catches a subtle sparkle light up in jungwon's eyes
"so there is absolutely no way hee and i got this right... but guys, the drive-thru girl looks super cute."
eventually jungwon drives up to the pickup window for his turn, where his eyes swore they were in contact with the love of his life (and they were)
"one chicken sandwich with a side of fries and a large drink?" you innocently ask with a gentle smile on your face, waiting for the man to confirm his order before handing it to him.
unfortunately for jungwon, he was too mesmerized to pay attention to what you were saying
he simply nodded his head, to which you responded by handing him his order
jungwon reached for his food, but he truly couldn't take his eyes off of you
so much so, that his fingers slipped and dropped his large drink
"oh my goodness, i'm so sorry! let me get you a new drink real fast..."
you swiftly apologize and turn away before jungwon could even get the chance to take accountability for the mistake
he looks off to the camera propped up on his dashboard with blown out eyes
a small smirk lingers on his face as an idea pops up in his head
you return within a matter of minutes, handing him a new drink and extra napkins
you once again apologize profusely for the silly incident, to which jungwon hands you a $20 bill in response
"what is this?" "a little tip for a really pretty girl."
jungwon's camera catches a playful glint sparkle in his eyes as he flirts
you, unable to respond to jungwon's advances, mumble a shy thank you
but your dilated pupils and rosy cheeks said more than enough to him
as jungwon drives away (not before giving you a cute wink), the camera catches you looking at the bill with a large grin appearing on your face
the bill had a sticky note attached that cutely read: "the spilled drink was my fault. please accept my apologies :) - jungwon" with his number written underneath
jungwon admittedly couldn't even believe himself
shooting his shot in the drive-thru of a fast food restaurant is crazy work
but i bet his fans are even crazier
they were determined to figure out who you were
not for any malicious intent or anything of that nature
but rather they were proud of the man for shooting his shot
seeing jungwon flirt on camera was not an uncommon thing
but those past instances were playfully directed towards his friends he filmed with, never a girl
so jungwon falling head over heels for this cute drive-thru girl was something that was not on his viewers' bingo card
a few videos and hundreds of adamant comments later, jungwon dropped the bomb and admitted that he left his phone number on the $20 he handed you
he left it a mystery as to whether or not you reached out to him
but with the way he kept looking behind the camera and smiling like an idiot at a hidden shadow figure revealed more than just that
"won, you are not slick whatsoever. look at you, you keep glancing back over here!" "sorry, i can't help it when i have such a pretty girl helping me film my videos."
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⎯ NISHIMURA RIKI
i picture this man as a shit poster (as in he posts whatever he wants, whenever he wants)
thus he one day decided that he wanted to film a solo yap & mukbang session at his favorite diner
"ello chat, welcome back to the channel. we have no motive or goal for the day, but we're gonna have a nice solo date at one of my favorite local diners. not saying the name because i'm gatekeeping :3"
the diner was not too busy given that it was close to midnight
you were one of the few waitresses on duty at the time
and riki just so happened to be seated in your section of the diner
riki paid little to no attention to his surroundings at the time
he was given a basket of breadsticks to enjoy while he waited for his waitress to arrive
so while he was yapping about the political and economical state of the world /j
his beautiful waitress (aka you teehee) finally approaches him
"good evening! is there anything i could get you started with?"
since you asked so kindly, bro so badly wanted to ask for your number right then and there
but being the nonchalant emo he is, he simply ordered a ramyeon and a bubble tea (what a cutie pie)
you swiftly wrote down his order and assured him that his food will be out as quickly as possible
you left him behind with an adorable smile and reassurance that if he ever needed something to not be shy and flag you down as needed
riki watched as you walked away, the camera catching a cheeky grin grow across his face
"chat... abort mission. the waitress is quite literally the prettiest human being i have ever laid my eyes upon." he aggressively whispers to his camera, which he had propped up by the condiments beside him.
purposely kept ordering just so you could keep coming back to his table
with the amount of times you were sent back to his table, you would think he would garner the courage to at least make you aware of his interest
but nahhhh
the camera pitifully filmed riki ogle you throughout the night
thank goodness you worked at a 24 hour diner
was too shy to do anything but order food and anxiously eat
he eventually racked up a hefty bill by the end of the night
minus $300 from his bank account and no cute waitress' phone number... big L moment right there for nishimura riki
BROTHER DIDN'T EVEN GET YOUR NAME
he eventually went home with an hour and a half's worth of footage of just him eating, ordering more food, and of course, mindlessly talking about his waitress
"food? 10/10. customer service? 100/10. the waitress? holy hell, hit me up... please."
his fans were not used to watching him be such a simp
normally his videos consisted of him crashing out over video games or baseball
but over a girl? and a very pretty one at that
this coming from a guy who has not featured a girl on his channel once before
his video made big numbers on youtube
his adorable and flustered reaction to his waitress made everyone want to search for this mystery woman
however, with riki not revealing the name of the diner (he was adamant to gatekeep this spot) & little to no telltale signs throughout the video
it was lowkey a lost cause, much to riki's dismay
however due to the video's popularity, it wasn't long until riki's video appeared on your own youtube homepage
you recognized the diner easily from his thumbnail
and not to mention there was no way you would forget the cute boy who managed to return home with 5 to-go bags all by himself
you decided to take initiative and contact him through his instagram (which he expertly linked in the description of the video)
please help me find the love of my life.... PRETTY WAITRESS IF YOU SEE THIS HIT ME UP PLSPLSPLS INSTAGRAM (pls only dm me if you are the waitress 😞): nishiriki05
lovelyyn: hii this is the waitress from your little yt video haha, my name is yn :) nishiriki05: OHMY GOD nishiriki05: i mean Hi I'm Riki!
511 notes · View notes
wincore · 1 month ago
Text
I faked my engagement for free cake samples and got sued after I ran away AIO | haechan
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pairing: haechan x baker!reader
genre: comedy, fluff, rivals (?) to lovers (?)
warning(s): quite possibly you will be inflicted with cringe, shameless scamming, mild swearing, one (1) innuendo
words: 5.4k
song recs: santa doesn’t know you like i do by sabrina carpenter, too late for chocolate? by kana hanazawa, like a raspberry by 宇宙ネコ子, honey by kara
a/n: ty to my queens lana and cat for gassing up this dumpster fire i wrote in a caffeine haze while watching my bf die every 20 secs in ds3. the initial plot was going to be far longer and more fleshed out but i fear i'm past my prime ( ._. )" i still hope you guys have fun with this one!! i got to play around with hallmark comedy far more this time, so overall it was a fun time writing <3 happy new year, my lovely mooncakes!!
part of a nonsense christmas: reddit edition collab <3
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r/AmITheAsshole
u/YeastMode6969 • 3h
I faked my engagement for free cake samples then got sued after I ran away. AIO?
I (24F, small bakery owner) faked my engagement to get free cake samples at my rival bakery but the employee said I needed my fiance to be there. I panicked and grabbed the first guy to come through the bakery door after me. Turns out he’s not just some random customer. To top it off, he was ridiculously attractive even though he pissed me off every two sentences. I had a panic attack, told myself it’s totally not my fault, and moved on by baking fourteen cakes over the weekend. I thought I got away with it, but three days later, I got an email from him—he’s now suing me for “emotional damages” and “theft of pastries.” Am I doomed, or is this just karma with extra frosting?
⥣ 7.7k ⥥ 2,701 Comments
bun_theory0222 • 2h
INFO: Did you at least try the samples? Were they worth the lawsuit? We’re all dying to know here.
➥ Reply ⥣ 3.2k ⥥
muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h
nah cuz why is he suing when he CLEARLY wants to flirt??? this man is embarrassing but so are you. somebody matched ur freak <3
➥ Reply ⥣ 1.7k ⥥
soggywaffle0205 • 6m
YTA why can’t this shit happen to me. AT LEAST I would commit to the bit.
➥ Reply ⥣ 420 ⥥
cerealfordinner0323 • 2h
Bro sued you just to slide into your life again. He’s not slick, and neither are you. Good luck with that wedding cake.
➥ Reply ⥣ 9,011 ⥥
. . .
If you could hop a few steps to the right, feign unconsciousness, and climb right into the active fireplace, it could potentially make everything okay. For you, that is. Not for the poor bakery employees who would have to call the cops. 
“I’m sure he’s a handsome one!” The girl behind the counter giggles, light pink dusting her cheeks. “You’re- you’re so gorgeous!”
Setting aside the fact that most gorgeous women you know end up with malformed gargoyles, your current predicament is almost equally sinister. What started as an innocuous process to gain free wedding samples (in other words, a scam) has led to a question that should be obvious but completely escaped your mind following your trailing success.
“We’ll need to have you come in with your fiance for the free wedding cake samplers. Is he around?”
Is he around?! Boy, you sure hope so. Because now you’re also frantically looking around with the employee after you blurted out another lie: “He’s going to be here soon!”
When did you turn into a compulsive liar? You’re not sure if your mom would be proud of you for being so good at nabbing free food, or disappointed that you’re a filthy liar. After all, she did tell the buffet employees you were under 10 all the way till you were 14. So, really, you’re not the source of the problem! You brush your festive red skirt of invisible crumbs, trying to busy yourself.
The cafe itself is well decorated for Christmas—a silver reindeer bores holes into your head from by the front door, a small Christmas tree stands at the center that’s a little emaciated but the cute Sanrio ornaments in Santa hats make up for it, and most importantly, a beautiful Mont Blanc cake sparkles from atop the glass counter. (Seriously, why didn’t you think of this? Your own bakery is all sparkles and no play.)
You move out of the way of other customers, and casually glance at the source of your awe and joy. Powdered sugar dusts the top as idyllic snow, covering the sugared cranberries and sugared chestnuts, not dent in them under the white fondant star. The base of the cake is tied with an edible red ribbon, completing the seasonal aesthetic of it. A sigh rests momentarily upon your lips before it escapes. 
You love Mont Blanc cakes, but you never quite get it right. That’s your biggest failure as an up-and-coming baker, and such is the reason for your unhinged serial sampling scam. You swear it started off as a search for inspiration in a creative rut but before you knew it, a lie had spilled from your eclair-sweetened lips, and another, and another. 
It is at this point that you briefly consider bolting for the door. Tibet is great around this time of the year. Maybe if you convert to a monk lifestyle and atone for your sins, you’ll be granted a pardon in the form of delicious sweets. Before you can make your escape, however, the front door jingles, and in strides a sight unbelievably reassuring. A man with caramel hair enters, who might as well be wrapped in a giant red ribbon and seated atop a snow-white horse in golden ornaments.
It’s a Christmas miracle. Hallelujah! They still apply to you.
His smile—soft and sweet as meringue hearts—lights up the room as he inhales the warm, sugary air of the bakery. You’re hit with the vaguest sense of familiarity. He might be one of the few customers you get these days. For a moment, you falter. Are you really going to victimize this stranger?
Yes. Yes, you are. The situation is dire.
“Hi darling!” You exclaim within earshot of the employee, before lowering your voice. “Could you help me out a little here?”
The man blinks, dazed for whatever reason. “Uh… sure?”
“Okay, then follow along and ask questions later,” you reply, and loop your arm through his gingerly. The touch of his fuzzy winter coat makes you relax a little. It is chocolate-colored, with beige fluff around the collar. Not now, you think to yourself, You need to stop thinking about sweets for one goddamn moment.
“Here he is,” you laugh sheepishly as you bring the man forward. Gosh, what in the heavens are you doing? You didn’t even ask his name. 
The employee stares, jaw agape. What’s with the reaction? He’s not that hot. 
“O-oh,” she responds. “That’s quite the surprise. I never knew. Congratulations, sir!”
You turn to look at him. He simply scratches his chin with a sheepish smile, and manages to respond with a “Thanks, Kimi.”
He must be a regular, you think. Oh, (Name), what did you get yourself into? You’re just gonna have to read his name off his coffee order first.
“We have a selection of samples for our wedding cake choices,” the girl, Kimi, moves to the far side of the counter, offering a small menu card to the two of you. “I know you’re not a big fan of wedding cakes, Mr. Lee, but the latest tiramisu flavors should suit your tastes, no?”
Just how close are they?! You chew on your lip and try to calm your depraved little heart.
“Well,” he responds, thinking for a second, “I actually hadn’t thought this far. What do you think, honey?”
He turns to you with a radiant smile, but you sense a hint of mischief. You don’t have time to think of that though—so you just change the topic. 
“Actually, do you have a Mont Blanc flavor? I’ve always had trouble perfecting it myself.”
Truth be told, that ‘honey’ had flowed from his lips and struck you straight in the heart. He’s not too bad to look at, you think now. His tousled hair catches the light with a playful sheen, framing his face and accentuating his disbelieving smile, while his fluffy coat adds a cozy touch to his charming, boyish demeanor. If you were to overthink a little, you’d find a hint of mischief in his voice. Alas, you’re a simple girl who only overthinks sweet treats, not boys.
“You bake?” He blurts, before his ears turn red from realization.
Kimi shoots him a puzzled look and your breath hitches in your throat. Was the miracle an idiot in disguise?
“I mean, uh, gosh, you make me so nervous, honey.” He looks like he’s trying his very best to ace an exam he never studied for. “I meant to ask if you're going to bake.. today? Don’t look at me like that.” 
Maybe you should’ve picked a candied apple and prayed that a witch had poisoned it. You can’t even force out a smile at that pathetic save.
“You’re a lucky man, Mister,” Kimi jabs, a look of distrust in her eyes before they flash to you. “I’m afraid Miss (Name) in a wedding dress would make me drop dead at the altar.”
“Oh, you- you flatter me,” you choke out, “I promise you wedding gowns aren’t my thing at all. Besides, you’d look beautiful in white yourself.”
Why is she so into this wedding conversation? How close are these two? You’re not sure how to react, and neither do you know how this man is going to explain your mysterious disappearance the next time he visits the bakery. You’re sure as hell not going to continue the act beyond this. It’s time you retired from this scam business. You’re not even sure how you’ll talk your way out of this with the man, currently engaged in small talk with Kimi. 
And— is he blushing?! Does he have something going on with the girl—Kimi? Did you just ruin something? Your heart tightens a little, and you have to physically restrain yourself from falling to the floor, head in your hands.
You laugh awkwardly, trying to diffuse the situation. When you open your mouth, you are interrupted.
“Actually, Miss, I think I take back what I said about the handsome part,” Kimi jokes, evident disdain sent towards Donghyuck.
Your natural response is a little laugh that leaves before you know it. Maybe, the feelings you sensed were of unrequited resentment. He does have the kind of face that looks like it’s often smacked by girls. No offense to him.
Kimi hands you the first sample (two delicious slices of Mont Blanc) and excuses herself to fetch the rest. The two of you make your way to a booth with the heaviest silence you’ve ever experienced. You might as well be at a funeral.
“So… free samples are that good, huh?” The man asks, raising an eyebrow. 
“Shut up,” you mutter. 
“I’m Donghyuck, by the way,” he responds with a youthful laugh. “Might I have the honor of knowing my fiance's name?”
“(Name). And stop looking at me like that.”
He lets out a short breath.
“You know, maybe we should’ve pretended it was an arranged marriage.”
“Quite proficient in the scamming business, are you?”
“Oh, you’re better off not knowing my dirty secrets.”
You couldn’t care less about his secrets but the look you shoot at him is certainly dirty.
He opens his mouth but you interrupt him to absolve yourself first. “Listen, I don’t do this often. And I’ll have you know it’s nothing personal. Well, not against you. The owner of this place maybe.”
Donghyuck blinks. “Oh? Do tell. I’m all for being a hater with my fiance.”
You stare at him, not impressed.
“Sorry.”
“Okay, so this started a month or two ago. I had been working tirelessly, testing recipe after recipe, trying to perfect the Mont Blanc cake. It was my dream to make it iconic, you know? But before I could even settle on the perfect combination of flavors, some smug bastard opens a bakery right across from me. And what does he have as his specialty? Why, the Mont Blanc cake of course. Seasonal! Cute, elaborate new decor every two weeks! Just how rich is he? I bet he doesn't even bother to create his own recipes. This guy didn’t just steal my idea, he’s turned my passion into some overpriced, generic trend!”
You heave, tired from the onslaught of frustration. Chewing on your lower lip, a pout naturally makes its way onto your face, and so do more complaints. 
“And that’s not all, okay? I never see him at the bakery. I refrain from entering my competitors' establishments unless I greet them in person. But this asshole is just never there! What, is he too good to work at his own bakery? Too good to grace us lowly bakers with a visit? How could he just swoop in and steal my signature item?”
Donghyuck listens to your rant with intent, cheek resting against his palm. He even looks a little ridiculously charmed right now. 
“Wait… so you’re the infamous Free Cake Phantom everyone’s talking about?” He gasps.
You’ve finally turned to your poor, neglected Mont Blanc sample, just for your heart to jump out. “What?”
“Just kidding. Your secret is safe,” he says, digging into the cake with infuriating nonchalance. “But hey, you’ve got good taste. This Mont Blanc though? It’s my personal recipe.”
Your fork halts halfway to your mouth. “Your recipe? What, you work here or something? And, no offense, but it’s overwhipped.”
If that’s a joke, it’s not very funny. The man looks more like a confectionary than a confectioner. There’s no way he works here. He’s probably some jobless guy drifting from bakery to bakery on early Saturday mornings.
His jaw drops. “Overwhipped? Are you kidding me?”
You wave the fork at him like it’s a weapon. “Chestnut puree shouldn’t have the texture of mousse. It’s called finesse, Mr. Lee.”
Before he can respond, Kimi returns with another tray, and you slip back into character, placing your hand on Donghyuck’s. “Thank you,” you coo at her. “I can’t wait to share all these flavors at our wedding.”
Donghyuck stiffens slightly at the unexpected contact, but he recovers quickly, plastering on the fakest grin known to man. “Anything for you, sweetheart.”
Kimi laughs. “You’re such a lovely couple. When’s the big day?”
You freeze, and so does Donghyuck. For a moment, neither of you has an answer.
“Oh, we’re still, uh, deciding,” you blurt, glancing at him for backup.
“Yeah, we’re thinking spring,” he adds smoothly. “Cherry blossoms. Very romantic.”
“Y-yes. Maybe the Raspberry Rose should be in the winner’s spot then.”
As Kimi bows politely and walks away again, Donghyuck leans in to whisper. “Should I book the honeymoon now, or…?”
“Don’t push your luck,” you hiss, elbowing him in the ribs. 
He makes a pained sound, but recovers quickly. 
The second flavor is dubbed “Marble Eclipse”, a decadent blend of rich chocolate and vanilla, perfectly balanced with a luscious buttercream frosting. You try to focus on the taste, but Donghyuck’s smug grin as he watches you take a bite is more distracting than you’d like to admit. You’re not easily flustered, not by men. Unfortunately, he would have been the exact type you’d have tried to nab in college.
You shake your head. Focus, (Name), you think to yourself, You’re in the enemy’s lair right now!
“So… I might as well come clean,” Donghyuck says with a serious tone, right after you’ve taken a bite. You pause in horror. What arcane knowledge is he going to use for your humiliation this time?
“I visit your bakery often, and I must say your selection is just as good, if not better.”
You exhale.
“Oh, it’s better alright,” you retort, before realizing the unwarranted passion in your voice. You compose yourself. “I mean, maybe their Mont Blanc is… a solid competitor.”
Donghyuck laughs, clearly amused by the bashfulness on your face.
“Wait, are you patronizing me?”
“Of course not!” He places his hand over his heart in mock hurt.
“I think the difference is that this one keeps up with the youth.” He waves his fork about, explaining his point further. “Everyone loves new, shiny things. Cycle those as much as possible. Have you ever considered holding blind box events with your cupcakes? I’m sure the kids would love to find out which flavor of panda bear cupcake they got—matcha, my personal favorite, or coconut cream, or… god forbid, chocolate mint. Ugh. Have you considered removing that from the menu? Anyway, that shouldn’t take too much time and money, right?”
The youth? What is he, forty? However, however, the look on his face as he describes your own baked goods to you is enough to make you intensely flustered. Has this man visited so often? And you never noticed him? How could you miss that easy-going smile?
A familiar figure saves you from whatever awkward, garbled response you were going to muster.
Despite Kimi’s arrival, Donghyuck has a hard time taking his eyes off you. Lashes swaying with each flicker of his eyes over your face, he’s hardly taking a bit of the delicious marble cake, in fact. What, have you got something on your face?
Kimi apologizes profusely before you can say anything to greet her. 
“There’s only one slice prepared for the Tiramisu Dream sample,” she explains. “I’m so sorry about this. Would you mind sharing this one? I apologize again.”
“No worries, Kimi,” Donghyuck responds, laughing a little. You shake your head and reassure it’s alright too. 
Anyway, that slice is going to be yours. You’re ready to pry it from his cold, dead hands.  
To your surprise, though, he shoots a friendly smile at you. 
“Want the first bite?”
“May I?” You ask, just to be sure.
“By all means,” he says, gesturing grandly. “After all, what’s mine is yours, fiance.”
You swear, if he calls you that one more time, he’s going to end up in the cake display.
Kimi stares at the two of you blankly for a moment. It instantly flusters you and Donghyuck both, so much so that the idiot digs his fork into the cake slice and holds it up to your lips with a soft ‘ah’ —and so much so that you actually accept it graciously. 
And all that only for Kimi to not even notice as she excused her way back to the counter. So now you’re just two idiots deep in your romantic charades. Donghyuck clears his throat, too late to cover his coral-tinted cheeks and ears. You’re certain you wear a similar expression.
“You’re- you’re so weird,” you jab, unable to come up with an insult higher than middle school grade. 
“What, you wanted me to do airplanes too?!”
“Take that fork and drive it through your tongue, will you?”
“Woah, woah, no need for violence, Miss (Name). Peace and Love.”
Unexpectedly, it makes you break character into unbound laughter. The weariness of the act and the silliness of the whole situation leaks into the sound, and it’s enough to make Donghyuck join in. For passersby, you are just a couple already past your third, fifth and seventh dates.
“Any comments for the tiramisu cake?” Donghyuck asks, grinning ear to ear.
You catch your breath, wiping a tear from the corner of your eye. “Yeah, I have a comment: who puts this much cocoa powder on top? Are you trying to choke your customers?”
“Awh, and I thought you were gonna be nice,” he whines, “Your smile is just so… inviting.”
As if on cue, he chokes on the cocoa powder. 
“I still like it,” you continue. “I’d just do it better.”
“I have the utmost confidence in that.”
Gosh, his smile is nauseating—too bright, too easy, like he’s actually enjoying this. Maybe he’s a rising actor, and you’re the one being hoodwinked. After all, who looks at someone like that on a first meeting?
A moment passes, and suddenly his thumb is at the corner of your lips, brushing off the cocoa powder with a touch so casual it feels anything but. “Got it,” he murmurs, and the air between you shifts, warm and oddly heavy.
“So, how do you know all this?” you ask, changing the topic. You’re forcing yourself to focus, to breathe. 
He leans back, a small laugh slipping out like he’s grateful for the lifeline. “You- uh- you could say I’m a connoisseur of pastries,” he offers, his voice lighter now. “I like to sample the best around town—just, you know, legally. I even take notes of my favorites.”
He gestures towards you, and you scoff.
The words settle between you as you toy with the edge of your skirt, smoothing the fabric down over your lap. There’s something about the way he speaks—so casual, so effortless—that needles at you. For a man so annoyingly confident, he sure seems relieved to have redirected the conversation.
Your hand grazes the tiny snowman buttons on your cardigan, tracing the cold plastic absentmindedly. His gaze flickers to the movement, then back to your face, a smile tugging at his lips like he’s trying not to laugh. You don’t know what’s more embarrassing—getting outed as the Cake Thief or the fact that he’s bound to know he flusters you.
You tilt your head, giving him a skeptical look. “How professional of you.”
The bite in your tone is softening, and you don’t like it one bit.
He holds up his hands, feigning surrender. “Hey, it’s an art. Someone’s gotta appreciate it, right?”
The faint chatter of other patrons fills the room, but his presence sharpens the moment, making it feel like it’s just the two of you. For a fleeting second, you catch yourself wondering what kind of person would take notes on pastries for fun. It’s so bizarrely specific, so utterly unnecessary—and yet, so like him.
His smile deepens, pulling you out of your thoughts. “You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?” he teases.
You roll your eyes, but there’s no stopping the traitorous grin threatening to break through. You refuse to indulge him, even as you feel the faintest crack in your defenses.
"Maybe,” you say, finally.
He chuckles, the sound warm and genuine, before leaning back against his chair with a satisfied air, as if he’s won something. You glance at the tray, willing yourself to focus on anything else.
How awkward. How warm. 
You spot a napkin fluttering off the table, carried by a sudden draft from the door. Instinctively, you step out of your chair to grab it, but Donghyuck beats you to it, scooping it up with an exaggerated flourish and a bow.
“Your knight in shining armor,” he declares dramatically, holding it out like a trophy.
“More like my nuisance in sugar-stained armor,” you retort, snatching it from his hand.
He laughs, unabashed. “Ah, so sharp. Yet here you are, sharing cake with said nuisance. Life is full of mysteries.”
“I’m just here for the cake,” you deadpan, dusting your hands off.
For a second, his smile falters—not in hurt but in sheer disbelief. He tilts his head, studying you with an incredulous expression, and you suddenly feel like a frog under a magnifying glass.
“You really don’t get it, do you?” he says, almost to himself, his voice low but still playful.
“Get what?” you ask, genuinely confused.
Donghyuck presses his lips together, fighting back a grin. He steps closer, leaning in just enough for you to catch the faint scent of chestnut cream. “I mean, I could spell it out for you, but that might ruin the fun.”
“Spell what out?” you press, a little flustered now.
He straightens with a laugh, shaking his head. “Nothing, you airhead. Absolutely nothing. Is your head full of cotton candy, by any chance?”
You narrow your eyes at him, but before you can respond, he’s already pulling his chair back, resuming his seat with a sigh.
“Mont Blanc, Marble Eclipse, and Tiramisu on the first date,” he states, deep in thought. “Maybe Matcha Lemon, Lavender Peach, and White Chocolate on the second… Perhaps a Red Velvet and a Strawberry Shortcake before you realize I literally own this place?”
You feel the heat intensify on your cheeks. You almost miss the last part, clouded by the implications of the rest of his words. He… wants to go on more dates with you? Was this a date all along? You’ve been swindled into having fun with a man somehow. He even knows the ins and outs of a baker’s life. And he’s charming in an oddball sort of way. You shouldn’t be feeling solidarity with this weirdo. But then again, somehow, his laugh is very… endearing. 
Wait a minute.
“You- you really own the place?!” A scream dies in your throat.
Donghyuck looks positively taken aback. “So you actually weren’t aware?!”
“What do you mean? How the hell am I supposed to know?! You described yourself as a connoisseur of pastries. I thought you were some kind of freelance failure so I didn’t pry!”
“Excuse me?!”
“Well, either that or you’re unbelievably rich. But then you don’t look it. Your sleeves have flour and oil stains on them, and your shoes are all dusty too, and there’s gold flakes in your hair—okay, how did I miss this?”
“Geez, way to judge someone by their looks. I’m not taking that from the local tart snatcher.”
The retort barely registers because your brain is too busy replaying the words “I own this place.” The realization hits, and before you can think better of it, the chair screeches back as you bolt upright.
“Wait, where are you—” Donghyuck’s voice is cut off by your shrill, mortified “Bye!” as you make a beeline for the door, leaving behind a very startled staff and a half-empty tray of cakes. Immediately after your exit, you let out a shriek. 
What the hell are you doing?!
Your face burns as you speed-walk down the street, each step punctuated by the memory of your impulsive retreat. You must have cast your senses away at that moment, like some wide-eyed fool in a fairy tale, almost charmed by that silly man and his absurd little quirks. It’s not your fault, of course—it’s his, with his flour-dusted sleeves, that stupidly endearing laugh, and the way he talked about pastries like they were a love language. What was wrong with him?! you think, conveniently ignoring the fact that it was your awkwardness and runaway theatrics that had caused the scene. You’d blame it on sugar overload if it weren’t for the nagging realization that maybe—just maybe—he’d gotten under your skin, and the fact that you deserved it.
. . .
You hadn’t expected to hear from him again. Not after your embarrassing getaway. But three days later, you’re staring at an email with the subject line: "Notice of Legal Action for Unauthorized Sampling."
You open it with trembling fingers, only to find what can only be described as the world’s most dramatic—and definitely fake—lawsuit. 
Your jaw drops as you scroll through the email. He’d even attached a fake case number: #CAKE-404-NO-FUN.
The body of the email was littered with ridiculous legalese. Phrases like "egregious acts of confectionery negligence" and "failure to properly appreciate artisanal craftsmanship" were scattered between absurdly specific accusations.
There is a diagram. An actual diagram. Arrows pointing to "Exhibit A" (the Mont Blanc) and "Exhibit B" (the empty spot on the tray), annotated with notes like "victim of hasty consumption" and "left to fend for itself."
And then, at the very bottom, there it was—the pièce de résistance:
“This suit may be settled by one (1) heartfelt apology and one (1) coffee date at the aforementioned bakery. Should you require legal counsel, I suggest bringing your A-game. I am, after all, a connoisseur of arguments… and pastries. 😉”
You groan, head thunking against the back of your chair. The audacity. The drama. The fuckass emojis. 
This man is getting to you.
Your first reaction is, of course, panic. Your second? Rage. And by the time you storm into the bakery at ass o’clock before it even opens, Donghyuck is waiting for you, leaning against the counter like he owns the place. (Which he does, actually.)
He’s propped on his elbows, his posture easy and unhurried, as if he’s been expecting you. The black apron around his waist is slightly askew, and his beige T-shirt bears faint streaks of flour across the chest, a testament to an already busy morning. His fluffy brown hair is an artful mess, the kind that looks unintentional but infuriatingly perfect, with a few errant strands curling over his forehead. There’s a streak of something golden—sugar, maybe?—on his cheek, catching the light as he tilts his head to regard you with an expression that’s equal parts curious and smug.
“You’re early,” he remarks, his voice low and teasing, as though he isn’t the root of all evil.
“You think this is funny?” you demand, shoving your phone in his face.
Donghyuck grins, unbothered. “Hilarious, actually. Did it get your attention?”
“You can’t just send someone a fake legal notice!”
“Worked, didn’t it?” He shrugs, leaning back with infuriating calmness. “Besides, you owed me an explanation for your Houdini act. You know, poor Kimi had to clear your tray. She almost cried.”
“She did not!”
As if on cue, Kimi pokes her head out of the kitchen. “Oh, she absolutely did. It was tragic,” she deadpans before ducking back in.
You groan, feeling your cheeks grow hotter by the second. “You’re unbelievable.”
Donghyuck leans back, smug as ever, and gestures to the email still open on your phone. “Unbelievable or resourceful? Let’s review: I sent a single, harmless message—full of creativity and wit, I might add—and look where we are.”
“At me wanting to strangle you?”
“At you running right to me,” he corrects, his grin widening. “What, were you worried?”
“Don’t flatter yourself,” you snap. “I’m here because—” 
You stop, realizing you don’t have a decent answer. “I didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of thinking I took you seriously.”
“Oh, you absolutely took me seriously.” He nods sagely. “I saw the panic in your eyes. Admit it: for a second, you thought you were going to have to pay me a hundred grand or grovel at my feet.”
“I- ugh- fuck you!” is all you can muster, stepping forward without thinking.
He mirrors your movement, the space between you shrinking by degrees. 
“But seriously, you ghosted me, and I had to get creative. What the hell was I supposed to do? I figured the legal drama might get my point across.”
“What point?”
“That I wanted to see you again.” The words come out so easily, so matter-of-fact, you don’t know how to respond. When you finally glance up, he’s watching you closely, his expression uncharacteristically sincere.
“Just because you’re all cute and covered in flour like the star of some indie chef movie doesn’t mean you get to toy with me.”
“Ha! You’re presumptuous—despite all the fine details on me you seem to observe.” He leans in. “But guess what, I’m a greedy bastard that loves attention. So, look closer.”
And you look anywhere but his lips, too pink and too plush, as your face grows hotter than a convection oven on broil.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” you manage, staring resolutely at the display of cakes. “That hardly counts as details.”
“Details,” he echoes, his grin growing wider. “Like the way I look at you?”
“You’re just a flirt,” you mutter.
He gasps, mock-offended, and gestures dramatically to the kitchen. “Kimi, did you hear that? I’m just a flirt!”
“You said it, not me,” Kimi calls back without missing a beat.
You laugh despite yourself, the sound surprising you. And Donghyuck doesn’t miss it. His gaze softens, the teasing edge in his voice dropping slightly. “There it is. I knew you could laugh without running away.”
You roll your eyes. “Don’t get used to it.”
“Too late.”
For a moment, the air shifts, the humor giving way to something quieter. Donghyuck’s gaze lingers—not on your awkward posture or flushed cheeks, but on you, as though trying to piece together something he doesn’t quite understand.
“What?” you finally ask, defensive.
“Nothing.” He shakes his head, but there’s a small, genuine smile now. “Just... you’re such a fidgety person.”
“Are you trying to shell out an insult?”
“No, I mean, I always see you scuttling here and there. Always on the move. Always observing, but never stopping long enough to be seen. You just… don’t seem like someone who takes much time for yourself.”
You blink, caught off guard. He tilts his head, like he’s trying to figure out if he’s crossed a line.
“I’m wrong?” he asks, almost sheepishly.
“I—” You pause, unsure of how to respond. “You’re nosy, that’s what you are.”
“That’s a yes,” he decides, grinning again.
Donghyuck chuckles, leaning just a little closer, his warm brown eyes locking onto yours. “Tell you what,” he says, his voice dropping to a murmur, “I’ll prove I’m not just nosy. Let me take you out. Somewhere you don’t have to bolt out the door halfway through.”
“You think I’d agree to that?” you retort, though your words lack bite. The proximity is doing something to your brain, and you’re acutely aware of how close he’s leaned in.
His grin is confident and infuriating. “I think you’d be curious enough to say yes.”
Your breath hitches as you realize how little space is left between the two of you, your noses almost brushing. “Woah,” you whisper, trying to play it off, “my mommy warned me about boys like you. All up close and personal with flour in their hair.”
He raises a brow, unrepentant. “Smart woman. But she didn’t tell you we’re pretty good at first dates, did she?”
You can’t help the laugh that escapes, soft but genuine. “Fine,” you say, straightening up and taking a step back before your pulse betrays you further. “But you’re paying. And no weird cakes this time.”
“Deal,” he replies, his smile softer now, more sincere.
And for a moment, you believe it—not just the act, not just the cakes and the banter, but the idea that maybe, somehow, this strange, sugar-dusted series of events has led to something real.
. . .
r/AmITheAsshole
u/YeastMode6969 • 16h
UPDATE: I faked my engagement for free cake samples then got sued after I ran away. AIO?
Fine, you guys were right. We’re dating now. Let’s just say we’ve been filling my cream puffs lately  🫠
Edit: I also got the Mont Blanc recipe!!
⥣ 7.7k ⥥ 3,297 Comments
kimikakes • 13h
KIMI HERE, REPORTING LIVE FROM THE SCENE: they literally argued over frosting consistency for half an hour yesterday. This relationship is built on chaos and croissants.
➥ Reply ⥣ 7.1k ⥥
bun_theory0222 • 2h
Hellooo where are the recipes. Priorities, OP :/
➥ Reply ⥣ 4.1k ⥥
lil_sugar_daddy0813 • 1h
man i was betting on donghyuck dying alone i dont wanna lose my $20
➥ Reply ⥣ 1.3k ⥥
muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h Give me your money NYEOW ➥ Reply ⥣ 1.7k ⥥
soggywaffle0205 • 6m why are you suddenly a furry ➥ Reply ⥣ 1.1k ⥥
muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h pays the bills ➥ Reply ⥣ 2.7k ⥥
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gublerryswift · 5 months ago
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Why does she give a damn about me? | Spencer Reid x Reader
cutesy, cheesy fluff
In wich Spencer thinks reader is out of his league but she could not be more into him.
Content: Garcia is a queen as always, sunshine!reader
Warnings: Maybe some light lack of self steem from spence, but nothing crazy!!
He was used to it at this point. Being the weird kid in high school and college, Spencer never really expected anyone to be into him and, after being rejected a couple of times, he had practically closed himself off in that sense. But then, you came into the picture.
You are one of those girls that everyone seemed to gravitate toward, not only because of your beauty but because of your essence. You were genuinely kind, smart and good with people in a way he wished he was, maybe that’s why he was so drawn to you, you had all the qualities he wished he had and being close to you made him feel complete.
Needless to say that he was in love with you, it had started as an admiration and when he realized he was thinking about you all the time, but he was sure you would never be into guys like him, he was sure you’d never see him as more than friends.
You had joined the team a few years ago, you were excited to finally be doing what you really wanted when you joined the BAU, going out in the field and being on cases instead of just working a desk job all the time. When you first met the team, everyone seemed very welcoming but you felt yourself especially drawn to Spencer out of all people, at first he seemed distant but with time you noticed how sweet he was and how much he cared for everyone around him and god that man was so funny, you loved his weird science jokes and his magic tricks. How were you supposed to not fall in love with him? You asked yourself that question every time he brought you coffee in the morning or went on his rambles about some random thing.
After a particularly intense inquiry from a very drunk Garcia in one of the girls' nights she organized at her home, you told her your feelings for Reid and she made you swear you would act on it.
“Garcia, I'm not confessing. He's not into me like that, i’ll just ruin our friendship”
“Oh honey, he practically kisses the floor you walk in, he follows you around the office like a lost puppy and practically kills any officer that dares to be the tiniest bit mean to you. There’s no way he’s not into you, at least try pretty please” She says, doing puppy eyes at you. Garcia took her job as a cupid very seriously and was not going to let this be her first fail.
“Alright, i’ll try but if he ends up hating me you’ll have to bake me cookies everyday until i die” You say rolling your eyes and finishing your glass of wine.
“Ohhh i’ll be cooking cookies for you guys wedding!”
So, here you are holding his favorite order from the local coffee shop and gathering the courage to press the button to the elevator
“Hey are you fine?” A familiar voice calls you, when you turn around its spencer.. Great, guess you’ll have to do this right now
“Oh hi yeah, I was just um… meditating”
“Did you know meditanting has been proven to increase your memory and is also great for reducing anxiety. I really should start doing it, what method do you use?” Spencer says while pressing the button to the elevator
“Ummm breath in, breath out i think” You say, unsure how to respond
“That's actually one of the best ways as it oxygenates your brain and helps it work better, it can also help you feel more calm since deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system that sends a signal to your brain to tell the anxious part that you're safe and don't need to use the fight, flight response” He says, doing the little smile and head nod thing he always does after info dumping.
You smile back at him, as you both enter the elevator and press the button to the BAU floor.
“I brought you something” You say, handing him the coffee shop bag
He opens it and smiles at you “I can’t believe you remembered my favorites, thank you so much” You love that smile so much, all you can think about is how perfect he is and how there’s no way you can continue on without dating this man.
“Actually, I need to tell you something spence… I was thinking, maybe we could go out together as like, a date or something” You say, already blushing from the embarrassment you felt and how scared you were that he did not reciprocate the feelings.
“Really? Of course i want, to be honest i’ve wanted to ask you to be honest but i thought you’d never see me like that”
“Are you kidding me spencer? I’ve had a crush on you since we first meet”
The elevator gets to the office, and you both walk in blushing and joking about how you two were so blind to each other's feelings. As you get in, garcia passes by you two stopping to stare
“There’s something happening here…” She says, pointing between you two and pressing her eyes together as if she’s profiling you two
“I asked him out”
“Oh my god finally, you see? I’m always right, I don’t even need to ask what he said, look at Reid, he’s glowing, ohh i’m so happy” She says, walking out to probably tell the news to everyone on the team.
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mewhenimanangel · 9 days ago
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need that, hamzahthefantastic
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pt.1* next
—synopsis. mandy invites you to hangout with some of her friends. christmas vlog vid
notes 🫧: guys i need hamzah bad
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— 🐞
you sighed with content as you finally landed on an outfit you liked. it was a plain long sleeve with a pair of loose dark wash jeans, you weren’t sure what everyone else would be wearing so you picked something simple.
your phone buzzed, mandy asking if you were on your way to her house. you sent her a voice message as you threw on your coat and grabbed your keys along with your purse and phone.
mandy had invited you over to hang out with her, martin, and hamzah and his friends, who you knew from 4freakshow.
you'd never met chase and claire before, but you've hung out with martin and hamzah a few times with mandy.
you met her when she was in nursing school, becoming friends after a few awkward encounters. she introduced you to martin and after a while you met hamzah, in person at least, since the two of you already followed each other.
you parked your car outside their house and adjusted your lip gloss in the rearview. you were a little nervous for some reason. maybe it was the fact that you were late, maybe it was the new people you were meeting, or maybe it was the vlog.
you have your own youtube channel but being apart of other people's videos always made you feel a little awkward.
you texted mandy that you arrived and headed for the front door, martin opening it before you could knock.
"someone's a little late" martin joked as he let you inside. "oh my god i forgot you guys went bald. that was a freaking jumpscare." you teased.
mandy came up to give you a hug "i know, they look insane. i did not approve." she said  before you were introduced to chase and claire. chase walked up with the camera, focused on you. "hi youtube" you stuck out your tongue.
"now that y/n is finally here, the trio outfit is complete." claire handed you a set of pajamas, matching the ones her and mandy had on. you grinned and complimented the set before hamzah came out from the back hallway.
"oh hey, didn't know you got here already" he dapped you up. "boi yes you did, literally went to the bathroom to fix his hair" claire teased. "oh wait..." chase joined in, making you laugh.
"i don't know why he's got this freaking tuque on anyways. embrace the bald dude, embrace the skin." martin pulled his beanie down and rubbed hamzah's bald head, urging hamzah to push him away.
"yo! he just fucking sniffed me" hamzah laughed, grabbing his beanie from his hand. "we're just cucking the viewers i guess" martin said, leaving everyone just staring at him awkwardly.
"yeah anyways, y/n you could go change in my room" mandy told you. "heh, just be careful what you find in there" martin leaned into a shrug. "dude stop" hamzah flicked his hand over martin's head.
once you were changed, chase made you do a twirl for the camera and you posed before tripping out.
"so how come y/n gets a pajama set, but you said no to me?" martin asked mandy. "cause she's one of the girls and you're not a girl"
"plus nobody told you to wear them freak ass leggings boi" hamzah teased him and you laughed. he looked over at you, taking in the fact that he made you laugh.
hamzah always thought you were really pretty and cool, even back when you first followed each other during the 4freakshow days. you didn't even have a youtube channel back then, only posting random tiktoks he thought were funny.
"alright y'all let's get to baking, i'm hungry" chase said behind the camera before flipping it towards him.
you stood next to hamzah as claire pulled up the recipe on her tiktok and her, mandy, and chase got started on measuring things out.
“you can’t just do it willy nilly style brah, measure it” you told martin as he began pouring sugar into the mix. “sometimes you have to live life on the edge, y/n” martin scoffed.
as you continued baking the cookies, you realized how glad you were that you decided to come. martin and hamzah were always a hoot but you really liked claire and chase too.
“noo it was my legs and he said ‘you’re scratching your ass’” claire defended herself from chase and hamzah’s teasing. “girl no i was right behind you”
“we’re having booty cookies” “we got fucking booty flavor” you and hamzah joked at the same time, causing you to crack up and slap his arm.
you took your hand off, not expecting his bicep to be so strong. he nudged you with his elbow, still laughing.
“so, are you actually gonna help bake, y/n?” chase playfully raised his eyebrow. “right, standing here doing nothing” hamzah added. “oh bitch says you, who’s actually done nothing. mr. nonchalant baldhead.” you joked, grabbing the camera from chase and putting it in hamzah’s face.
“boi get outta here boi” he laughed.
while the cookies baked, you guys moved on to putting up the christmas tree. you sat down with chase and claire and began unfolding the branches of the tree. hamzah followed suit, taking a seat on the floor next to you.
rudy walked up to hamzah, who grabbed him with one hand under his belly and placed him in his lap. “awww rudy, who’s a cutie cootie coo. ah poochy poochy poo” you reached over hamzah’s leg to pet the dog.
you scratched behind his ear, unknowing of hamzah staring at you while you did it. “alright let’s put in some freaking work guys” claire said and hamzah lifted rudy into the couch behind him.
“why do you literally manhandle everything that comes your way?” you teased. “like in the video where you’re flinging around fish” hamzah just chuckled in response.
“wait chase, i like your leggings” claire said from behind the camera. “what these aren’t leggings?”
“i’m just saying i’ve never seen a boy wear leggings, it’s a compliment”
“they’re not leggings, they’re thermals! they’re long johns..long johns?” martin retorted, displaying his leg out in front of the other. “you’re wearing fucking leggings”
you and hamzah stifled your laughs in the corner as they continued and martin teared up, walking off with the camera as a bit. “claire you actually made him cry” you giggled.
you felt hamzah lean himself closer to you, taking advantage of the laughing fit everyone was in.
after a while, the cookies were done as you finished decorating the tree, adding a little christmas bunny along with everyone else’s personalized ornaments.
you turned around to hamzah manspreading on the couch, trying to ignore your thoughts about how sexy it was and followed everyone else into the kitchen.
you all iced the cookies before doing a taste test, “boi crumbl cookie could neverrrr” you joked, as the cookies actually turned out bad. “this shit is way too sweet oh my god” hamzah said, spitting his into the trash. “ew dude have some manners” martin scolded him.
once mandy ended the vlog, you all lounged around her living room until you got a emergency text from your roommate.
“bruh, my roommate messed up something with our dryer. i have to go” you frowned. “awww noooo” chase frowned with you. “it was really nice meeting you” he said. “yeah, you’re funny as fuck” claire added. “oh i love you” you hugged her before getting your coat off the rack.
“im so glad you actually came” mandy said. “well thanks for inviting me” you playfully stuck out your tongue. “i’ll see you next time we hang out in like four to six weeks” you said, sarcastically. “ugh tell me about it” she smiled as you dapped martin.
hamzah came out from the bathroom, “you’re leaving?” he asked. “yeah my roommate needs help” you pressed your lips together. “oh…..it was cool seeing you though” he dapped you up, pulling you into a small hug. “you too” you smiled, holding his hand a little longer before your phone buzzed again.
“anyways merry christmas and happy holidays everyone! byeeeee” you closed the door behind you and head for your car.
lvryn
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Liked by hamzahthefantastic and others
lvryn mini dump 💩
user omg is she the reason hamzah was acting so mysterious this video
user yall saw the way they were so close to each other this video
user love your whole life 😍
— 🐞
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