#guy ritchie's the covenant review

[agentnico]

Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant (2023) Review

This movie opens with an aerial shot accompanied by the song ‘A Horse with No Name’. The use of that song immediately gains this film extra points. Well played Guy Ritchie!

Plot: Guy Ritchie's The Covenant follows US Army Sergeant John Kinley (Jake Gyllenhaal) and Afghan interpreter Ahmed (Dar Salim). After an ambush, Ahmed goes to Herculean lengths to save Kinley's life. When Kinley learns that Ahmed and his family were not given safe passage to America as promised, he must repay his debt by returning to the war zone to retrieve them before the Taliban hunts them down first.

I really enjoy Guy Ritchie films - especially his geezer-gangster flicks that feature kinetic high-octane action shots, British dark humour and noir-style chutzpah. It’s only certain directors that you watch their films and you immediately recognise its their film without even needing to know beforehand their involvement. Guy Ritchie’s style is signature to his characteristics, and the recent Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre that came out earlier this year exhibited those qualities with a delightful Statham bang in the middle. However in cometh The Covenant - a strong departure from Ritchie’s prior works. Away with the rough East End and grizzly jokes, and instead what we have is a very reserved and straight-faced war thriller.

The Covenant is very much two films meshed into one. The first half is a solid action war film, as we’ve thrown right into the midst of the Afghan war and the US troops taking down Taliban outposts, with amazing sweeping shots of the desert terrains and the tensions that come between the two sides. It was riveting, suspenseful and interesting, and honestly if that was the whole movie it would have been a very satisfying viewing experience. However the last hour is more so a separate recon and rescue mission mostly undertaken by one soldier - another epic film on its own. That second part is really what makes this film stand out from other war movies, as it really reiterates the central theme of a reality check on bond, pledge and commitment. This is accompanied by very focused non-nonsense directing to the stellar screenwriting (minus a couple of awkward exchanges between Gyllenhaal and his wife played by Emily Beecham - their dialogue during their calls felt as if they were written by a computer AI); excellent cinematography; a steady pace that knew when to take things slow and when to amplify the action in accordance with the story beats; spot-on music score by Christopher Benstead which especially in the final 15 minutes really underlined the emotional journey we’ve just been through; and finally some excellent performances.

The two actors that carry this movie are Jake Gyllenhaal and Dar Salim. The bond between them and the emotion they manage to deliver, something simply through their facial expressions without even saying anything, was truly impeccable. This isn’t the kind of film that will be remembered when the Oscars come around, but honestly both deserve some acting nominations. But both are on top-form, with Salim’s portrayal of Ahmed especially managing to captivate the audience with caring for his character’s fate. Very well written and superbly acted. Appearances by Jonny Lee Miller and Antony Starr work well too.

Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant is a very straightforward story of survival in a war landscape, and there is haunting feeling of knowing that elements of this story are true to many people’s reality. I applaud Ritchie for evidently coming out of his comfort zone and delivering such a serious film with such a heavy subject, but also managing to make it so engaging by getting us to care for these characters. This is a well-made movie, a true army flick, made by real men for men! War is never good, but friendship and valour are always worth of admire.

Overall score: 7/10

[batmannotes]

Guy Ritchie's The Covenant

Written and directed by Guy Ritchie, The Covenant is one of those movies that flew under the radar. How this movie did not do better at the box office is quite a mystery.  Critics and audiences that watched the film gave it positive reviews.

To me, this film is arguably one of the best flicks of the decade so far and definitely worth checking out, especially on the Blu-Ray format.

The movie is set in the year is 2018, around 17 years after the first U.S. troops were sent to Afghanistan and three years before the United States Armed Forces were withdrawn. US Army Sergeant John Kinley (Jake Gyllenhaal) and his unit have an ongoing insanely dangerous job in Afghanistan. After an unforeseen incident, Kinley must pick a new Afghan interpreter Ahmed (Dar Salim). Little does he know his choice would have life altering consequences.  

Although not specifically based on a real-life event, the script, explores ideas of what might have happened right before the United States pulled out of Afghanistan.  

Ritchie directing style fits this movie perfectly, his fast-paced, kinetic style really brings this story to life. The two-hour runtime never lags, which is a rare thing nowadays. The acting duo of Gyllenhaal and Salim will have you cheering for the unlikely partners while keeping you at the edge of your seat. The heroic efforts of the two main characters and their unspoken “covenant” will keep a lump in your throat throughout the second act of this film. 

Even with no disc extras except a digital copy and accompanying DVD, The Covenant shines on the Blu-Ray format with a crystal clear 1080p transfer and bombastic Dolby Atmos sound. Do yourself a favor and do NOT read the film synopsis which gives away a lot about the movie. Instead, grab yourself a copy, sit back and enjoy a fantastic flick.  

FINAL GRADE A-

Guy Ritchie's The Covenant is now available on Blu-Ray.

Order now on Amazon. Direct link here.

[mylifeincinema]

My Week in Reviews: July 8, 2023

Only two this week, and somehow they’re both Guy Ritchie films.

The Covenant (Guy Ritchie, 2023)

Wow. I did not expect this. This is an extremely well executed military action film, with solid performances from its two leads and exciting direction from Ritchie. Nobody’s reinventing the wheel or anything, but pretty much everything works, here, and it makes for an exciting, emotionally resonant piece of action cinema. - 8/10

Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre (Guy Ritchie, 2023)

Another one I did not see coming. Not nearly as good as The Covenant, but the cast and action are all really fun, and the plot is works as a lightweight piece of spyjinks, making this is an all-around satisfying action-comedy. - 7/10

Enjoy!

-Timothy Patrick Boyer.

[ciegeinc]

Movie Review...Guy Ritchie's The Covenant

(4/5) Starts off kinda slow and typical but then finds its heart at the halfway point. It initially reminded of Mark Wahlberg's film Lone Survivor but soon after those similar scenarios the film pivots into a story about character more so than surviving. You will be on the edge of your seat during several battle scenes with this one.

Guy Ritchie's The Covenant follows US Army Sergeant John Kinley (Jake Gyllenhaal) and Afghan interpreter Ahmed (Dar Salim). After an ambush, Ahmed goes to Herculean lengths to save Kinley’s life. When Kinley learns that Ahmed and his family were not given safe passage to America as promised, he must repay his debt by returning to the war zone to retrieve them before the Taliban hunts them down first.                

[tinyreviews]

Ahmed’s wife and child, though just passive plot devices, really help ratchet up the stakes and tension.

Guy Ritchie's The Covenant (or simply The Covenant) is a 2023 American action thriller film co-written, produced and directed by Guy Ritchie. The film stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Dar Salim. 

[kacic1]

A todos, boa noite!

Hoje convido vocês a visitarem Os Filmes do Kacic, para conferir minha nova crítica sobre este eletrizante thriller dirigido por Guy Ritchie e estrelado por Jake Gyllenhaal, facilmente um dos melhores filmes do ano até agora.

Crítica: O PACTO (GUY RITCHIE'S THE COVENANT) | 2023

🎬🎞🎥📽📺

[mikethemovieguy]

Watched it! 🪖 Movie Reaction to Guy Ritchie's The Covenant now playing on Prime Video.

Blog post: https://bit.ly/49tjHqy

[lumieretrain]

Here’s my new review in IMDb about Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant by Guy Ritchie, which is a thrilling war movie, filled with dynamic moments to one of the best movies of 2023.

[moviewarfare]

A “QUICK!” Review of “Kandahar (2023)”

This is a 2023 action movie about a US operative having to fight his way out of Afghanistan with his interpreter while being hunted.

Wait isn't that the same plot as Guy Ritchie's The Covenant?

It's a little weird that this movie came out just a month after The Covenant with almost the same plot. The 3rd act and the ending is also VERY similar. The difference comes in execution and unfortunately, Kandahar isn't as good.

The first hour is incredibly slow as it setups the whole plot but it takes ages. The relationship between the main lead and the interpreter isn't that strong. The message isn't delivered in a very meaningful way. There is also not a lot of action set pieces even though there is a stellar night sequence in this one.

It's just another passable movie starring Gerald Butler.

For more reviews like this visit:

https://moviewarfarereviews.blogspot.com/

[tamarindtoffee]

Guy Ritchies The Covenant

It got my attention because of Guy Ritchie. But the movie in itself was full of heart. I really loved it and was not even invested in it. So felt very rewarding at the end.

[oneofusnet]

Highly Suspect Reviews: Guy Ritchie's The Covenant GUY RITCHIE’S THE COVENANT MOVIE REVIEW In a film so different from everything else he’s made that he had to put his name in front of the title so you’d know it was him, The Covenant takes place during the war in Afghanistan. Jake Gyllenhaal plays sergeant John Kinley. His squad is tasked with uncovering… Read More »Highly Suspect Reviews: Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant read more on One of Us

[cinefesto]

Κριτική Ταινίας : Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant

Κριτική Ταινίας : Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant του Guy Ritchie #review Με τους Jake Gyllenhaal και Dar Salim,

To The Covenant (Άρρηκτος Δεσμός) του Guy Ritchie, αφηγείται μια συγκινητική πολεμική ιστορία που ξεφεύγει από το τυπικό χιούμορ του γνωστού σκηνοθέτη. Στην τελευταία του αποστολή στο Αφγανιστάν, ο Λοχίας Jon Kinley συνεργάζεται με έναν τοπικό διερμηνέα, τον Ahmed. Μετά από μια επίθεση με μοναδικούς επιζώντες τους δύο άντρες, ο Ahmed θα μεταφέρει τον τραυματισμένο Jon σε ένα ασφαλές μέρος,…

[agentnico]

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare (2024) review

Who the fuck cast this Churchill?? Looks nor sounds like the original Prime Minister. Where’s Gary Oldman when you need him?

Plot: Under the guidance of the British PM, a group of military officials hatch a daring plan to neutralize Hitler's fleet of German U-boats during World War II. Made up of a motley crew of rogues and mavericks, the top-secret combat unit uses unconventional techniques to battle the Nazis and change the course of the war.

I’ll always make the effort to watch anything Guy Ritchie releases. He’s a proven director that has made so many films I truly adore, including The Man from U.N.C.L.E., Snatch and The Gentlemen to name a few. I absolutely love his writing style, with his characters spilling dialogue like they are proclaiming poetry, all the while cussing and using foul-mouthed lingo to the extremes. That being said, in recent years I have noted that Ritchie has been working a little too much. Don’t get me wrong, I admire his passion and work ethic, but I swear we’ve been getting about two annual projects from him for the past few years, and he’s already got 3 or 4 other directorial efforts on the way. If we look at his most recent movies, The Covenant was a surprisingly grounded and powerful war movie that was truly engaging, however before that we had a couple of throwaway action flicks with Jason Statham, the titles of both I can’t remember without needing to look them up on IMDb, and there was also that Aladdin live-action remake with a blue pre-slap Will Smith as the Genie, where honestly I questioned why Ritchie of all people was chosen to direct, as Disney is not what one thinks of when considering Guy Ritchie’s gritty gangster filmography. So there’s very much a quality over quality concern here, at least in my eyes, however again I would always be in line for a Guy Ritchie movie, so I have finally checked out his most recent directorial effort in The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare and here’s what I thought.

It’s an Inglourious Basterds-lite rip-off. Even the music score by Christopher Benstead, as delightful as it was, felt like it belonged in a Tarantino movie, and the villain is played by Til Schweiger, who if one recalls also starred in Inglorious Basterds as ironically one of the basterds. So in a nutshell this is another movie about smashing and slicing Nazis like butter, blowing shit up with reckless abandon and throwing about amusing quips that can be referred to as banter. However for a movie with a supposedly exciting set-up where Churchill acts as a somewhat Nick Fury-type, as he sets up his WW2 style Avengers team, the whole thing feels a bit lifeless. Stuff is happening and brutal killings are completed, but the movie lacks any sense of energy, tension or sense of urgency.

Supposedly this is based on a true story, however after seeing the movie I cannot name a single character. All the main team lacks any depth or layers, as such finding it hard to care for any of them. In the trailers Henry Cavill was showcased as this psychotic deranged man who sticks his tongue out and eyes maniacally wide open as he guns down Nazi scum, so I was looking forward to an unhinged performance from him, however in the final product it turns out Henry Cavill is just the regular soft-spoken Henry Cavill, now just with a longer beard and messy hair. So nothing special - he gets to kill some Nazis though. Alan Ritchson, known to most as Prime’s Jack Reacher, gets some great bow and arrow Nazi kills, but in terms of any personality he was given a couple of unfunny jokes and glasses. Henry Golding….was just kind of there? He also killed some Nazis. Eiza González sings a song, and kills one Nazi. Again, all the actors are playing supposedly real life people, but in no way does the movie take any time to get to know its characters. And again let’s not even about that miscast of Winston Churchill - like seriously what the hell??

Ultimately I was left disappointed. This is a moderately entertaining action flick, with a couple of fun moments, but overall it’s a wasted Guy Ritchie effort, and again a signal that the director should maybe slow down a little, and take more time in between films to actually cook up something worthwhile. C’mon Ritchie, be a gentleman, take a break. Have a Snickers.

Overall score: 4/10

[gacmediadaily]

Movieguide ®, the number one family review service for movies and television shows, has officially announced the nominees for its 31st Annual MOVIEGUIDE® Faith & Values Awards Gala & Report to the Entertainment Industry. Hosted by Great American Family stars Trevor Donovan and Danica McKellar, the Awards Gala will take place on Friday, February 9th at the iconic Avalon Theatre in Hollywood and will broadcast on Great American Family later this spring.   

“Last year we saw a lot of strong and inspiring films and TV on the big screen and in the comfort of your living room, and we are excited to celebrate various bodies of work and talent,” says Robby Baehr, Movieguide® CEO. “To then be able to have the Awards Show broadcast on Great American Family is icing on the cake. We all share aligned visions to inspire and bring home to viewers, so this partnership is a perfect synergy.”

The event will honor the Best 2023 Movies for Mature Audiences, the Epiphany Prizes for the Most Inspiring Movie and Television Program, The Faith & Freedom Awards for Movies and Television, and the Grace Awards for Most Inspiring Performance in Movies and Television.

“The Movieguide Awards focuses on honoring quality family-friendly entertainment that deliver strong and inspiring faith-filled stories of faith, hope, joy, and redemptive love,” added Movieguide founder and publisher Dr. Ted Baehr. “We are excited to celebrate another year of honoring entertainment with faith and values.”

Here is the list of nominees for the 31st Annual Movieguide® Awards, in alphabetical order:

EPIPHANY PRIZE® MOVIES

AFTER DEATH

BIG GEORGE FOREMAN

JESUS REVOLUTION

JOURNEY TO BETHLEHEM

ON A WING AND A PRAYER

EPIPHANY PRIZE® TELEVISION

A CHRISTMAS BLESSING

DIVINE INFLUENCER

MURF THE SURF: JEWELS, JESUS AND MAYHEM IN THE USA: Episodes 1.1-1.4

A PARIS CHRISTMAS WALTZ

A THOUSAND TOMORROWS: Episode 1.3

BEST MOVIES FOR FAMILIES

JOURNEY TO BETHLEHEM

SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE

SUPER MARIO BROS. THE MOVIE

TROLLS BAND TOGETHER

WONKA

BEST TELEVISION EPISODE FOR FAMILIES

A CHRISTMAS BLESSING

DIVINE INFLUENCER

A MILLION MILES AWAY

A PARIS CHRISTMAS WALTZ

A THOUSAND TOMORROWS: Episode 1.3

BEST MOVIE FOR MATURE AUDIENCES

BOYS IN THE BOAT

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 3

GODZILLA MINUS ONE

JESUS REVOLUTION

SOUND OF FREEDOM

BEST TELEVISION EPISODE FOR MATURE AUDIENCES

ALL THE LIGHT WE CANNOT SEE

THE BURIAL

CHICAGO P.D.: “New Life”

MURF THE SURF: JEWELS, JESUS AND MAYHEM IN THE USA

REACHER: Episode 2.5: “Burial”

FAITH & FREEDOM AWARD® FOR MOVIES

BANK OF DAVE

GOLDA (2023)

GUY RITCHIE’S THE COVENANT

INDIANA JONES AND THE DIAL OF DESTINY

SOUND OF FREEDOM

FAITH & FREEDOM AWARD® FOR TELEVISION

ALL THE LIGHT WE CANNOT SEE

THE MANDALORIAN: Episode 302: “The Mines of Mandalore”

A MILLION MILES AWAY

MURF THE SURF: JEWELS, JESUS AND MAYHEM IN THE USA

TETRIS

GRACE PRIZE® FOR MOVIE PERFORMANCE

BIG GEORGE FOREMAN

Khris Davis

Forest Whitaker

JESUS REVOLUTION

Kelsey Grammer

Joel Courtney

Anna Grace Barlow

JOURNEY TO BETHLEHEM

Fiona Palomo

Joel Smallbone

ON A WING AND A PRAYER

Dennis Quaid

GRACE PRIZE® FOR TELEVISION PERFORMANCE

A THOUSAND TOMORROWS:  Episode 1.1-1.3

Rose Reid

 DIVINE INFLUENCER

 Jason Burkey

A CHRISTMAS BLESSING

Lori Loughlin

Jesse Hutch

Movieguide is the number one family review service for movies and television shows. With over 89 million monthly users, Movieguide is used by 1 in every 3 parents to determine which movies their family or children will watch. Additionally, Movieguide consults with major studios on what types of films will appeal to family audiences. Family films produce the biggest box office draws and the family film audience is the largest single demographic of movie-goers and television viewers.

[oceanusborealis]

Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant (The Covenant) - Movie Review

TL;DR – A solid action film that knows how to craft tension from its narrative and musical score. ⭐⭐⭐⭐ Rating: 4 out of 5. Post-Credit Scene – There is no post-credit scene.Disclosure – I paid for the Amazon Prime service that viewed this film. The Covenant Review – When it comes to war films, the more straightforward the narrative, the defined sides, and the motivations, the more likely a…

[rookie-critic]

Rookie-Critic's Film Review Weekend Wrap-Up - Week of 4/24-4/30/2023

Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019, dir. David Leitch) This was a good off-shoot for the F&F series. The Rock & Jason Statham feel comfortable as the titular duo and have excellent on-screen chemistry, and the action feels clean and exciting, which is no surprise considering the film was directed by John Wick-veteran David Leitch, who fits the franchise like a glove. I really enjoyed all of the climactic fight scenes with Hobbs' family in Samoa. Honestly, the more Cliff Curtis can be in major feature films, the better. Idris Elba and Vanessa Kirby also make for great additions to the growing franchise. It never really blew my mind like some of the mainline Fast films have, but I don't think it was really trying to. Sometimes a movie is just good, dumb, clean fun, and that's perfectly alright with me. I just hate that this film (along with a multitude of other behind-the-scenes reasons) means that we probably won't be seeing Luke Hobbs in any of the remaining Fast movies.

Score: 7/10

Currently available to rent/purchase on digital (iTunes, Amazon, Vudu, etc.) and on 4K, Blu-ray & DVD through Universal Studios.

F9: The Fast Saga (2021, dir. Justin Lin) After the wholly disappointing and, frankly, upsetting misstep that was The Fate of the Furious, I was curious to see if F9 would continue the downward trend, or if it would step its game up to bring some of the franchise's former glory back. When in doubt, trust in Justin Lin, who comes swooping back into the franchise for the first time since Fast & Furious 6 to save the day, with fan favorite character Han Lue in tow. This is biggest, wildest fast film yet, and I mean that as a compliment. That's not to say that it's the best (that honor is still held by Fast Five), but it does return a lot of the wonder and sincerity that Five, Six, and (to a lesser extent) Seven had. Not to mention that it is the first film in the franchise to incorporate Sean, Twinkie, and Earl from Tokyo Drift into the family in a major way since Tokyo Drift (if you don't count a tiny cameo from Lucas Black's Sean in Furious 7). Nothing about F9 feels as baseline or low-effort as the stuff in Fate did. Even the introduction of a mysterious third Toretto sibling that, for some reason, we hadn't heard about for the past eight films feels out of place or shoehorned in. Needless to say, where Fate of the Furious had me wondering if the franchise was receding in quality, F9 has me just as pumped to go see Fast X in May as I was after watching Fast Five.

Score: 8/10

Currently streaming on HBO Max.

Guy Ritchie's The Covenant (2023, dir. Guy Ritchie) I went into this with a lot of apprehension. I was not a huge fan of the last Guy Ritchie film that tried to take a more serious approach to its tone (2021's Wrath of Man). It had a lot of grandstanding machismo bullshit that I hate to see in modern filmmaking. However, Ritchie really surprised me with The Covenant. He has Jake Gyllenhaal acting at the top of his game here with an equally impressive turn from Dar Salim as Ahmed the interpreter. While the story is fiction, it highlights a huge problem in the aftermath of the War on Terror: thousands of Afghani interpreters were hired by the U.S. military and promised special immigration visas for their service; a promise that turned out to be hollow. It sends its message without grandstanding and is critical of the U.S. military without putting itself on a soapbox. The film does tend to get overly self-indulgent during big sweeping climactic scenes and in certain emotional ones, as well. It's the one thing about the film that feels out of place, but even in spite of that, The Covenant is an excellent film and proof that Ritchie is capable of making a more serious-minded, message-oriented film than the humorous heist or caper films he's known for.

Score: 8/10

Currently only in theaters.

Chevalier (2023, dir. Stephen Williams) I'll just say up front that my bias might show a little in my scoring of this one. I have never been the biggest fan of 16-1800's period pieces. I'm not sure what it is, but something about them has just never gelled with me. That being said, there's nothing really wrong with Chevalier. In fact, it is, in my opinion, much better than the average film of this sensibility. The acting is fantastic and it sheds light on an oft-overlook but quintessentially influential figure in both classical music and the French revolution. The music is a huge plus in the film's favor, of course, and the costumes are, as is the case with most film's set in this era, masterfully crafted. I think my biggest qualm with the film is that it stops right as the French revolution is getting started and then tells the audience that Chevalier went on to be a great leader during the Revolution. Maybe it's just me, but I think that sounds interesting enough to make it's own film about. This almost makes me wonder (and I don't ever really feel this way about films) if this would have been better suited as an 6-8 episode miniseries as opposed to a film. We still could have focused a 2-3 episodes on Chevalier's childhood and young adulthood in France's pre-Revolution music scene, but then dedicated an entire half of the show to his accomplishments during the Revolution. Regardless, I don't want that to take away from the fact the Chevalier was quite good, and definitely worth the ticket price. I just think more could have been done with the wealth of untold history that exists within the lifetime of this figure.

Score: 7/10

Currently only in theaters.

Polite Society (2023, dir. Nida Manzoor) This movie absolutely ruled. It gave me all of the frenetic energy of the best Edgar Wright films while also giving me the genre-bending and jaw-dropping off-the-wall attitude of something like Everything, Everywhere, All at Once. This was a film that wasn't afraid to go for it in every way, shape, and form. From campy-but-well-choreographed fight sequences, to plot twist that twist so hard they'll make your head spin, to an unabashed approach to a female-empowerment narrative. Not to mention a story that is very uniquely Indian that touches on the nature of arranged marriages and classicism. Polite Society had everything that I look for in a film, and is a very early contender for the best of 2023 list. I'll save some of my more in-depth thoughts on stuff like the acting, writing, and cinematography for this week's full-length, but just know that if anything I've mentioned above sounds even remotely interesting, make this a priority watch (I don't want to say definitively that this is the best of the weekend's new movies because I haven't seen Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret yet, and I hear that is pretty amazing, as well).

Score: 10/10

Currently only in theaters.

A Good Man (2014, dir. Keoni Waxman) Yikes. Just... yikes. Friday movie nights with my college friends can get pretty wild sometimes. I've never seen a Steven Seagal film before, and maybe this wasn't the best one to start with (or, inversely, maybe it's the best one to start with). Seagal is clearly past his prime here (or, again, maybe in his prime, depending on your perspective), and looks like he's constantly on the verge of passing out. His words come out slurred and mumbled like he's on his deathbed, and his "action" in the film is cut around so heavily you really never see him actually do anything. The story is non-existent and the writing contains some of the most unintentionally hilarious one-liners I have ever heard in my entire life (I'm partial to the one where Seagal utters the baffling sentence "Well, I'm sorry to hear that, because now I'll snatch every motherfucker birthday." No, there's no typo there, that is verbatim what he says. My meme review is that this is great. Real "The Room" caliber stuff, here. My actual review is that obviously Seagal is a lunatic that is just self-funding whatever production he can fart out in an afternoon at this point. Honestly, if you want some quality takes on this, visit the Letterbox'd page.

Score: 1/10

Currently streaming for free with ads on Redbox. Tzi Ma should be above stuff like this.

Sisu (2023, dir. Jalmari Helander) I really wanted to love Sisu. I'm as much a fan of mindless action movies as the next guy, but the truth is I thought it was just ok. It delivers on exactly what it promised everyone in the trailers, one-man army kills the crap out of some Nazis for 91 minutes, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are a handful of really fun set pieces and lots of entertaining gore for fans of that kind of thing, but it just felt incredibly hollow. There are no characters in Sisu, only templates of archetypes that things happen to. No one learns anything, there's no journey to be had, merely an avatar quickly making his way through bodies to get to a destination. I'm not implying that every single movie needs to have some grand, elaborate story with deep and complex characters and rich subtext or anything like that, but I would have liked at least some substance to this. There are still things to enjoy in Sisu, and from what I've read I'm a slight outlier in not thinking this is incredible, but it just didn't connect with me. However, don't let that stop you from seeing this in the theater. The cinematography and style alone are worth the big screen experience.

Score: 6/10

Currently only in theaters.