#guh hes so husband material

[redconagher]

scrunkly old man. i hate drawing his hat so he has scruffy ass hair instead. he is so silly

[love-toxin]

guh......climbing out of my hole of uni final papers for a moment.....bc i have to talk abt mike some more.....specifically dad(dy) mike-

(cws: fnaf movie spoilers, breeding, me being nasty right on schedule)

like....i can't get over it. he just strikes me as such dad material. he gives me the vibes of exhausted + mentally worn out + don't need another kid to run after but as soon as he's, like, free from the horrors and/or financially stable? he'd just be like "........so honey when are we having a baby??" right out of the blue. i get the feeling that he'd normally be a big family guy (hence the family photos everywhere and the.....intense childhood nostalgia) and he'd probably be all over starting his own if he wasn't dealing with all the death and murder and kidnapping and dream hopping and blah blah blah.

but anyways. baby. thinkin he wants one soooooooo badly.........and he'd be so stupid protective like a big, husband-shaped guard dog. we saw him in the fountain scene nobody can tell me he wouldn't go apeshit over protecting his little babus and their ultra hot momma--plus, at some point when Abby grows up he'd probably get such awful empty nest syndrome he'd be biting his nails not having someone to provide for and protect. that's his purpose! he's gotta be the strong one that gets shit done, hence knocking up some pretty thing that's got those pretty doe eyes and pretty hair and other pretty features for his kids to inherit.

i don't think it would hit him right away either, he'd think he's fine until he's blowin your back out and it hits him like ".....oh. shit," when he realizes how much he doesn't wanna pull out. not just because it feels good to bust a load so thick you leak all over the pillows, but because you might end up with a baby bump and that would be even cuter. you wouldn't even be able to trap him if you wanted to cause he wouldn't care about the contraception anyways--if you want to risk it, he'll risk it, and you might not expect how deep he goes as he tries to knock you up on the first try. you're not even half as crazy as he is, draining his balls inside you like it's an olympic sport just so he can make you take a test in two weeks. even if he can't afford it he'll take time off work just to keep you in bed for a couple days, give it a real good try so he can say he put everything he has into it. it's a good excuse for him to fall asleep still nestled inside you too, his weight pressing you down so you can't get up with all that cum slowly leaking down your legs. trying for a baby is so much fun and so intoxicating mike probably won't even realize how much work it'll really be until you start showing, but by then it's kinda too late anyways and it's not like he'd wanna go back and change it. seriously, he's so fucking lucky to even talk to you, much less be the father of your children and possibly your future husband.

but then he's got something so sweet and adorable to protect besides you on the horizon, something he can cuddle and kiss and rock to sleep and read bedtime stories to like he's loved doing with abby and always did with garrett, including all the silly voices he's made up to make them giggle and plead for just a few more pages. he can be even better than his parents and he'll finally have the second chance he's been dying for--and this time, nothing is gonna take what he loves away from him. nothing.

[lpham2525]

If you give a man a cardigan...(Part II)

EXT. DAYTIME. FRANKY’S TOBACCO STAND. 

FRANKY: Whoa, Loid, you’re not in a suit this time! Or a trench coat. I never thought I’d see the day when you would step out in public dressed so casually. 

LOID: I assume you’re referring to the cardigan? 

FRANKY: If that’s what you call that baggy, oversized sweater, then...yes.  

LOID: I didn’t expect it, either, but it’s so comfortable that I’ve taken to wearing it everywhere, even work.  

FRANKY: Is that all it takes for you to dress more casually? Something has to be comfortable? 

LOID: Well, that and YOR keeps giving me a certain look every time she sees me in it... 

LOID: It’s also exceptionally cozy. Do you know what it’s made out of? 

FRANKY: Let me guess... 

FRANKY: Husband material? 

LOID: Funny...that’s what Yor said. 

FRANKY: That’s because you left the tag on it like some mindless idiot. Man, you’re really losing your touch, Twi—I mean, Loid. 

LOID: What?! I would never be so heedless as to... 

LOID: *frantically twists himself into a knot, looking for a tag* 

LOID: Have I really lost my touch?! Or have I taken after my handler, leaving the tags on clothing like some kind of indiscreet— 

FRANKY: It’s over here, you dummy. 

FRANKY: *yanks a tiny piece of paper off of LOID’s cardigan* 

FRANKY: *peering closer at the tag* 

FRANKY: Hmm, you know what? Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this isn’t really the tag, after all. 

LOID: *snatches paper from FRANKY’s hand* 

FRANKY: Hey, I was still reading that! 

LOID: *squinting as he reads the tag* 

LOID: Husband material: 30% kindness, 25% respect, 20% supportiveness, 15% attentiveness, 10% cooking skills, 5% waku waku, and...100% oblivious.  

LOID: What the—?! This is handwritten! And suspiciously familiar...Not only that, but whoever wrote this does not understand percentages...Although strangely enough, everything is spelled correctly... 

LOID: *narrows eyes* 

LOID: Wait a minute... 

LOID: *zips away from FRANKY’s tobacco stand and makes a beeline for home, leaving a smoking trail in his wake* 

FRANKY: Okay...it was good to see you, too, buddy. 

FRANKY: So...how long do you think it will take him to realize you’re not at home? 

ANYA: *popping up from behind the tobacco stand* 

ANYA: Knowing Papa...less than 30 sec— 

[From far away, FRANKY and ANYA hear a distressed, frustrated scream of ANYAAAAAA!] 

ANYA: Oh, I under-emulate Papa.  

FRANKY: It’s ‘underestimate’, kid, but I gotta hand it to you, the fact that you were able to sneak that onto your dad’s sweater without being detected? That’s some real stealthy spy work you did there.  

ANYA: So Anya is real spy now?! 

FRANKY: *pats ANYA’s head* 

FRANKY: You’re getting there. You know, you take after your father more than I expected, even if you two aren’t actually related.  

ANYA: You don’t have to be related to turn out like someone, you know, Uncle Scruffy? 

FRANKY: I know, kid. And I see you made good use of that dictionary Loid got for you. From what glimpse I got of the tag, you spelled everything right. 

ANYA: Nah, I was looking through Papa’s files and he had one called ‘Vetting Wows’. It had most of those words in there.  

FRANKY: Guh! That, uh, probably wasn’t for you to see... 

ANYA: *shrugs* 

ANYA: Then maybe he shouldn’t put his files in the square behind the wall behind the cabinet behind the plant where I hide my candy peanut snacks.  

FRANKY: Wha...? They even hide things in the same places?! They really are more alike than I thought... 

ANYA: The funny thing was, he wrote Mama’s name over and over in the file, and he drew all these hearts and smiley faces next to them.  

ANYA: Maybe he and Becky learned the same secret code?! One day, I’ll crack it and I can write super-secret spy codes with hearts and smileys! 

ANYA: Anyway, thanks for helping me with the fractions, Scruffy-head. 

FRANKY: Uh, sure thing. You know, it would have added to 100% if you hadn’t slipped in the 5% waku waku in there.  

ANYA: I know, but Papa is very waku waku so I couldn’t leave it out.  

FRANKY: *laughs* 

FRANKY: That’s probably what gave you away.  

FRANKY: That and your handwriting... 

FRANKY: By the way, how did you manage to tack the tag onto his sweater in time for Yor to see it? I thought you were going to do it right as he was walking out the door. 

ANYA: I did do it right before he walked out the door. 

FRANKY: Does that mean she said ‘husband material’ before the tag was even on there?!  

ANYA: I guess so, but Mama thought Papa was husband material from their very first date. That’s why she asked Papa to marry her. 

FRANKY: Wait a minute, you’re telling me that your mother, the one who’s so nervous she has a hard time even touching your father...was the one who proposed to him?  

ANYA: Yeah. Why? Was she supposed to wait until the second date or something?  

FRANKY: There’s so much about these people I don’t understand! 

YOR: *rushing to the tobacco stand* 

YOR: Franky! Thank you so much for watching Anya. I completely forgot that I needed to pick something up from the drugstore. 

YOR: I have a rush job tomorrow night so it’s actually more poison for my weapons but...I couldn’t really take Anya along to buy that... 

ANYA: *aghast*

ANYA: So that’s why I couldn’t come with her... 

YOR: I’m all done now so we can go home, Miss Anya. Here’s some money for your trouble, Franky. 

FRANKY: *holds up his hands and shakes his head* 

FRANKY: This time, the babysitting is on me. Besides, we had a lot of fun... 

FRANKY: *winks at ANYA* 

FRANKY: Didn’t we, Miss Anya? 

ANYA: *nods vigorously* 

ANYA: We sure did! Uncle Scruffy was teaching me fractions! 

YOR: Oh, you were?  

FRANKY: Well, technically percentages, but it’s more or less the same thing. 

YOR: I’m so glad to hear that! If it’s not too much trouble, we’d love to have you continue teaching Anya. You’d be welcome at our house anytime. 

FRANKY: Trust me, it’s my pleasure. And who knows? Maybe I’ll come over sometime this week. Apparently, Loid’s got this new sweater he keeps raving about... 

YOR: Oh, the cardigan? Yes, it does look very good on him. 

FRANKY: *waggles eyebrows* 

FRANKY: Knowing Loid's taste, I bet it’s made out of some...irresistible material, too... 

[FRANKY and ANYA exchange looks.] 

YOR: Huh? 

FRANKY: Nothing, just something I was mulling over. Here, I believe this belongs to you? 

FRANKY: *picks up ANYA and holds her out to YOR* 

ANYA: *squealing with laughter since FRANKY is also tickling her* 

ANYA: Mama! Save me from evil Count Scruffy!  

YOR: *takes ANYA into her arms* 

YOR: I’ll save you, Princess Anya.  

YOR: *bows to FRANKY* 

YOR: Thanks again, Franky. 

[FRANKY waves goodbye to them. YOR and ANYA leave for home.] 

ANYA: Mama? 

YOR: Yes, Miss Anya? 

ANYA: What makes someone a good husband? 

YOR: Oh! Erm... 

YOR: What do I tell her?! I’ve only ever had one husband! And we haven’t even been married that long! I also don't know other married men that well so it’s not like I can compare them!  

YOR: *stumbles for an answer* 

YOR: Well, what DOES make someone a good husband? I’ve never had to think about it before, but since I only have Loid as an example... 

YOR: *flashes back to the Eden Academy interview* 

YOR: A good husband is someone who stands up for you. 

YOR: *flashes back to LOID whispering her that she didn’t have to kiss him in front of YURI* 

YOR: A good husband is someone who respects when you have limits. 

YOR: *flashes back to LOID’s comments about YOR’s “massages” * 

YOR: A good husband is someone who...who accepts you as you are. 

ANYA: Is that why you chose Papa?  

YOR *without thinking* 

YOR: Yes, that is exactly why I chose him.  

YOR: Wait a minute, that IS that why I chose LOID. All this time, I kept telling myself that I chose to marry him so I could keep my real job...but in all that’s happened since, I’d almost forgotten that this was the real reason I chose to marry him at all. 

YOR: *shakes herself*  

YOR: Well, we’re home now so why don’t we see what your Papa is...Anya?  

ANYA: *drooling on YOR’s sweater* 

YOR: Oh, she must have fallen asleep while I was deep in thought. 

YOR: *freezes as an agitated LOID zooms down the stairs and skids to a halt in front of YOR, his face pinched and his finger pointing accusingly at...a sleeping ANYA* 

LOID: Dammit! She’s foiled me again!  

YOR: Loid? What are you...? 

LOID: I...! She...! Arghhhhhh! 

YOR: *holds a finger up to her lips*  

YOR: Shhh, she just fell asleep. I’ll carry her up as gently as I can. 

LOID: *slumps forward, defeated* 

LOID: I’ll get dinner started.  

YOR: I forgot about that. A good husband is someone who knows when to be gentle. 

YOR: *glancing at LOID's cardigan as they walk up the stairs, a recent memory coming back to her*

YOR: And when to be firm.

[jujutsubabe]

How Satoru react if s/o was bonding with his students and becoming a parental figure/older sibling to them and was super protectively them, even going so far fight off a deadly curse to keep them safe?

oh god Gojo with someone who takes care of his students 😭😭😭

He calls u two a power couple, like he loves having someone being just as hyped up about his students as he is.

Whenever you two talk about the students, he makes u refer to them as “our kids” as if you two were parents 😌

“Hey did you drop our kids off yet?”

You can literally hear him smiling over the phone,“Yeah, our kids are at the school.”

“Ok, thanks. Love you bye.”

He squeals and rolls around when you hang up 💀 wtf is wrong with this man....

Expect him to make custom shirts with your first names on the front and on the back it says “Gojo power couple” Good day💀

If ur willing to fight off a curse for his students he’s going to hype you up from the sidelines, even going as far as to make a poster with your name on it 😭.

“If you have the energy to make that then help me...” You would say.

“I don’t want to ruin this poster! Team Gojo you got this!”

He’s lucky he has Itadori to cheer back while the rest of you glare from behind...

You’re super protective of the students when there’s a curse, so you always hold your arm out, pushing them away to explain what they all need to do.

You’ll be explaining the team work they need to do, looking super serious and trying to focus but like,,,,

Ur kinda hot......

*cue Gojo internally squealing.*

If he has to join in, he’s so excited to work with you. At the end of every fight he says, “wow! Look at us? Aren’t we just the best?? Look at the examples you guys have, you must be so happy to have parents like us!”

“Gojo, were not your kids.”

He waves Megumi off and tries to make out with you, as if the kids are not standing right there.....

sometimes the student’s will be watching a movie and pull you in.

They update you on the current part and get all excited talking about it and aw ❤️ theyre so cute.

You have to physically hold in all of your squealing and cooing as you see Itadori do his dorky character impressions.

Honestly?? The kids love hanging out with you, it’s so fun!

You’re mature enough to call them out when they’re wrong, and also laid back enough to laugh at their jokes.

They eventually get really comfy with you, not minding if you’re in the same room as them, kinda inviting you whenever you walk by.

They all have specific things they like to do with you!!

Nobora likes it when you paint her nails, Itadori likes it when you pet his hair, and Megumi likes it when you cook dinner with him.

They all see you as a parental figure okay💗guh ugh dawwww

He feels like he’s apart of a family when you’re around, you being the serious parent and him being the fun one.

When he sees you interact that way, he fr cannot help but join in, it makes him warm and sticky inside🥰.

When Satoru isn’t around they go to you for help, asking for advice on cursed energy and sometimes!! If you’re lucky!! They ask about dating or life advice!!

you overheard Itadori talking about the topic once, you were passing by his room when you overheard him on the phone speaking loudly with someone.

He was talking about his love life, and you being the nosy person you were, decided to hear just what he talked about.

You listened in as Itadori talked about this girl he had his eyes on, “Yeah, she’s great. I think she’s the most beautiful girl in the world.”

You nearly choked on your spit, Itadori actually liked someone??

You didn’t expect to hear this content, especially not by just walking past his door!

You leaned your ear closer, “Her smile is so beautiful! I’ve never seen anyone like it, I have to marry her.”

Your eyes popped out of your head, marry!? Marry who!? Did your ears stop working or did you hear that right?

“She’s in my room right now actually, if you want to see.”

Your jaw was on the floor. Your hands nearly shaking from his confession. Who was this girl that Itadori thought was beautiful, marriage material, and had in his room???

Though you loved the idea of him having a girlfriend, as an adult you couldn’t allow Itadori to be alone with a girl in his room, especially without telling anyone she was even in there!

You took in a breath before knocking at his door.

You heard a thunk and shuffling on the other side as he opened the door, probably hiding the girl as he walked over.

When he opened the door, his hair was disheveled as wide eyes adorned his face, “Hey, is something wrong?”

You shook your head, then backtracked and nodded. “Yes Itadori, I was passing by and couldn’t help but overhear your conversation about a girl being in your room.”

“Oh you heard that?” He cocked his head, and you pitied the poor boy, you didn’t want to be the one to bring such down information. “I thought I was being quiet.”

You shook your head, “No, and though I think it’s great you’re getting into a relationship, it’s not appropriate for her to be in your dorm. Especially without you telling anyone.”

His eyes seemed to race in thought, probably going over an excuse of some kind that you could only shake your head at, “Oh but—“

“No but’s Itadori, do her parents even know she’s here?”

“Well I don’t think...they do.”

You sighed, you hated having to set rules, it sucked being the bad cop in the situation.

“Itadori, that’s so dangerous! How did you plan on taking her back home? Her parents must be worried sick.”

This was so unlike him, to hide something from you, you wondered if Gojo even knew about this.

“Uh well,” he fiddled with his thumbs, “maybe it’d be better if you saw her...”

He pulled the door open to reveal Gojo posing behind him in a skirt.

“Hi honey!”

Was shocked the right word to describe the situation?

You stared dead at your husband with your mouth dropped. How... how were you supposed to react to that?

“We were trying to prank Fushiguro and Nobora if it helps.” Itadori said, holding his phone up.

Nobora’s face popped up on the screen, “Don’t worry, it didn’t work.”

You could see Megumi studying in his room and shaking his head. “Go get your husband, he’s been bothering us for hours.”

You always wondered how long you could drag Gojo by his ear for.

Answer: 45 minutes

(He bribed you with food if you let go...)

So he likes the way you interact with the kids and he really likes playing around with you😌