#guess who sacrificed three hours of sleep for this

[i-bet-you-wish-i]

Inspired by @secretdazedragon lovely "vampires are cats' posts and this iconic gif

[coveholdenmyluv]

R. Braun - Honey Soaked Promises

synopsis. In which you reminisce on your quest for revenge, irrigated with broken promises and fermented with betrayal, allowing you to act as the judge between life or death for yourself and the viper dressed in the skin of the love of your life.

— or alternatively, in which you make the stupid decision to fall in love with the wrong person on your journey to freedom...

Oh well, you'll just have to kill him now.

Series masterlist

chapter warnings. none! oh, also there's no reiner this chap, sorry :(

chapter sypnosis. Unexpected visitors, unexpected topics. Conversations that dictate the outcomes of many events to come in the future.

A/N: okay! I know this took forever and a day, but it’s here… though it is rather short. Nonetheless, I love how it turned out and I hope you do too, I’ve already begun working on the next chapter a while ago so fingers crossed it doesn’t take another century!

VII. The Dawn of the Ocean. Word count: 6.1K

“If what Armin had shared with you happened to truly exist, you feared that fact would change more than you wanted it to. The mere possibility forged a newborn pavement road in your vision of the future. A path that your heart called for, but if you acquiesced and indulged, that would mean sacrificing your long term goal.”

Teetering the edge between indulgence and selfishness.

You were never a morning person.

At one point you had even abhorred the time of day and regarded it with such disdain. That day was not disbarred from your wrath as you twisted and turned in your sheets in search of a position in which your covers were not far too warm for your taste; but alas to no avail, you were left frustrated. You groaned in discomfort and kicked the sheets off of your body as you internally berated yourself for seeming so ungrateful — for just a few years prior you hadn't had the privilege to do so. The mental scolding delivered by yourself only worsened your disposition and you huffed.

Light footsteps reverberated throughout the wood that fabricated the barracks you stayed in and a familiar voice followed.

"Y/N, are you awake?"

You sat up, albeit as sluggishly as possible, and blinked your tiresome eyes at Krista who had climbed halfway up the ladder to peer at you. "No." You stated.

The girl giggled, "Oh? Are you sleep talking then?" She teased with a grin.

"Yes, but I don't know how to sleep walk so whatever you need, it'll have to be done from here."

"Unfortunately, that's not do-able. You have visitors!" She informed you enthusiastically. Her words caused your brows to furrow in confusion — you had no plans to your knowledge and no one had mentioned that they needed to see you so soon during the day.

"Is it Jean? I already told the guy, I don't want him showin' me his coin collection again, it's really not as cool as he thinks it is." You perfunctorily guessed.

The boy had plenty to display to you in those regards, though you didn't think you could have endured an additional three hours of the delineating of the differences between pieces of metal that no longer held any value. Though, he had sworn up and down that was not to be the case in the near future; you surmised his idea of near differed from your own. Although, if his words had held merit and he indeed accumulated wealth off of his chunks of junk, perhaps you would have eaten your words.

You hoped he would have still paid you frequent visits at the very least, or extended an invitation to take a tour around his home located deep within the interior. You had entertained the idea of him becoming a noble, as brisk as the humored thought existed, and resolved that such a thing could have only been plausible when the walls fell — which, in your mind, was equivalent to the word never.

"It's not Jean this time, you should come down to greet them." She informed you and descended to the ground where she presumably went about her day.

'Them?'

Her phrasing piqued your curiosity and you swiftly slipped on your brown sweater before you followed her actions and arrived on the ground. As you stepped up to the door of the barracks, you were met with two gentle and amiable faces.

"Marco and Armin? To what do I owe the pleasure of your sudden visit this morning?" You asked with an inquiring tilt of your head.

Marco had become one of your dearest friends since the day you joined the Cadet Corps, he had welcomed you into his coterie with open arms and a warm grin. You spent most of your meals in his company, with the addition of a certain tall and long faced fool.

Truly, your question had been directed towards the latter of the pair.

You had the chance to acquaintance yourself with Armin and determined he was an altruistic person. You had no issues with the blonde and didn't mind his abrupt visit, for you entertained the idea of growing closer. Though, you had not reached that stage of your relationship yet. He was merely a friend of a friend, so there was no pondering on why his visit had came as a surprise to you.

"Good morning, Y/N!" Marco greeted and his bright grin caused your insides to warm at his affability. You couldn't help but to smile in return.

"Mornin', Marc." You replied.

Armin spoke next with a wince, "Good morning, Y/N. I'm sorry to bother you on one of our days off, and so early too. I hope we don't burden you too much."

You reassured the boy with a dismissive flick of your wrist, "Nah, it's fine. I had to get up soon anyway, I should thank you for giving me a reason to quit lazying around."

"It wasn't without reason either, I promise." Marco told you, "Basically, we were wondering if your services were still available?" He asked with a hopeful light in his eyes.

Your brows furrowed in question, "Services?" You repeated. The pair nodded in unison and pointed a finger towards their own heads of hair. The realization struck you then, and you sighed in resignation. "Alright, talk. Who was it?"

Armin chuckled sheepishly, "Do you even have to ask?"

You scoffed playfully and decided he was absolutely correct in that judgment. "That girl is gonna be the death of me." While no spoken words had confirmed it, there hadn't been a need for them to. Sasha was, indubitably, the suspect who spilled your competence as a hairdresser. "Come on in, you can head all the way towards the back." You instructed, and stepped aside to allow them to enter the girls space. Both boys acceded, and by the time you had drawn out your supplies, Armin sat prettily on the wooden chair; albeit slightly stiffly considering how intrusive he felt to visit a space intended for the opposite gender.

Hesitatingly so, he strained his neck as to peek at the tools you had laid out on the surface of Sasha's bed. It was the least she could have offered, considering her blabbering words had led them to you in the first place. Not that you minded it much. "Uhm, so, what exactly do you use, anyway?" The blonde asked.

Unsheathing the blade that had continued to lay in your pocket for years, you presented it proudly. "For the most part, this small thing." The case was worse for wear, though still intact enough to be useful, but the cunning edge had still held its pristine and threatening shape; curtesy to your thorough care. "Recently though, the girls have gathered their own tools and let me use them when I need to. I'm sure they won't mind." You explained.

The array of instruments that laid before you had consisted of shears, bristled brushes, wide tooth combs, sectioning clips, and some hair ties. While it hadn't been the most adept collection, it held some merit and did its job.

Marco sat beside the layout and fiddled with whatever had piqued his interest. "This is impressive, I didn't know this was an actual thing." He uttered in awe.

His words had caused you to chuckle lightly, "Me neither, I was under the impression it was a one time occurrence. I guess I can make some exceptions," You teased, "I don't mind, really." You finished, and it was the truth. It bore you no hassle for the movement of your fingers was as instinctual as wielding a blade. Ironically, both skills worked in your favor in that moment. "Anyway, what are you looking to get done today, Armin?" You asked.

He seemed to have had needed a moment to mull the ideas over in his head before he resigned and explained his decision. "For today? Just slightly more than a trim, if possible. Perhaps some time in the future I'll grow the balls to go shorter." He tittered, before apologizing. "Sorry."

His tone had indicated that he bore some embarrassment for his decision, which you felt the need to soothe. "That's fine with me, hun. It's far less labor on my part." You reassured.

"Thanks," He sighed in relief, "My hair has always been a part of me that is intertwined with my confidence. I guess, sort of like a security blanket? Something that I'm not so sure if I'm ready to let go of yet."

You nodded understandingly, for that sentiment was something the both of you had shared. "I get it, that's pretty common." You were sure that many more cadets in your class had felt the same, or perhaps thought the opposite and wouldn't mind leaving that security blanket behind. "Can I begin?" You asked, to which the boy accepted.

You brushed through his aureate strands first — an action you found had hardly even been needed in the first place. It seemed as if he heeded his golden locks enough to treat them with the utmost care, something you found that you admired and decided to provide the corresponding amount of effort from your own palms.

His eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of your fingers parting his hair, alike a garden-fresh breeze towed in with the springtide. The lashes that feathered his cheeks had made it apparent that he found your gentle touches comforting.

"I was wondering, how did you learn to do this type of thing? Did someone teach you?" He voiced suddenly.

You pondered your response rather than uttering the bare truth that came to mind, ran your words through a mental sieve and culled your phrasing. "You could say that, I guess. Though, I'd call it sittin' around and watchin'." You chuckled at your vague reply. "Perhaps the skill rubbed off on me, which I reckon wasn't such a bad thing."

"Well, it worked out for us either way." Marco added with a warm smile. You knew then that he had to have sensed there was more you were reluctant to share, and as always, the freckled boy never pried but instead attempted to alleviate your stress; never intensify it.

You hummed softly, "Very true. Thank you, slothful ten year old me."

Apparently, the early hour was not a nuisance to solely you, for Armin released a large yawn. Though, that action was not what had your eyes broadening as you staggered.

It was the glassy appearance of his cerulean irises once his eyelids had peeled away once again. The blonde was gifted with wide and round shaped eyes, which weren't the greatest contradiction to the ones that arose in your mind, though you would not classify them as similar either. You had guessed it was the gleam they harbored that sparkled alike the millions of lanterns that flickered about every night, or perhaps it was simply the way in which they appeared when soddened. Most likely, it was the doe eyed stare he peered at you with — so alike, yet dissimilar.

Your breath hitched and you implored yourself to analyze the details that made them distinct, instead.

Cielo's weren't as wide as his, and they certainly were not the same shape. They had also differed in shade, disparately so — whereas Armin's mirrored the sky during midday, Cielo's were reminiscent of the opposite. You supposed Mikasa's irises bore the most resemblance, considering they resembled in shade and shape. Though, if you had the obligation to choose, she was most definitely not the person you would have compared his to.

But, that raised the question: what was it that had made you envision the small boy?

"Y/N?" Armin called in concern.

You blinked harshly to release yourself of your trance and noticed that your palms had remained stagnant in their previous movements, right before his face. "Oh, sorry." You apologized and sluggishly resumed his trimming.

"You're fine, I was just worried. Is something the matter?"

You shook your head slightly, "You just- you kind of reminded me of someone just now."

His brows rose with curiosity, "Oh, who?" He asked.

You allowed yourself to respond at your own pace, not intending on ignoring the boy, but as well as refusing to force yourself to speak in vulnerability. "Just someone that I used to know." You replied shortly.

Your dry response had caused the blonde to reappraise his inquiry, for he feared that he had trekked over a line that he wasn't aware existed.

Marco remained quiet, instead opting to inspect your expressions closely. There was an aura to your words that created an air of uncertainty. He realized that it wasn't that you were uncomfortable speaking about the mystery person on your mind, it was that you simply did not know how to. There was conflict in your eyes reflecting a storm that brewed anew. He was certain that, that storm had not previously been there nor did it deserve its place; for it replaced the usual crisp draft that swept away the sepulchral tones.

You berated yourself for behaving so uncongenial towards the boy. He should not have felt poor for asking genuine questions.

"He used to love clouds." You offered as compensation. Unexpected, but not unwelcome. You chuckled airily, "Sometimes, it looked as if he wanted to nap in'em."

Armin smiled fondly, "Did he love to spend his time outside?"

You gulped down a whimper, "You could say so."

The boy beamed at your confirmation, "Me too! I love a lot of things about the outside worl- er, I mean the outside. Like nature!"

Though you had caught his hesitation, you hadn't called him out for it, figuring that if you had your own secrets, others were allowed to have theirs.

"Me too." You giggled. "While I didn't see my expression, I know that I probably looked like a lunatic the first time I saw a river. Not to mention, the first time I held snow." Your eyes softened in their reminiscent state, "This might sound cheesy, but it was life altering. In some abstract way." Your voice dwindled into a whisper.

"It was the same for me," The boy related, "I mean, I know that snow isn't living, but it felt like I was holding life directly in my palms." His fond stare had moved to poke and prod at his own hands.

Your eyes widened in recognition, a flicker of excitement igniting in your chest. "Really? I felt that way too."

He hummed in agreement, "It was..." He sighed in resignation after a moment of deliberate dwelling on words. "I don't even know how to describe it, or if I'd ever be able to."

That had been one of the very first instances in a while where it was as though someone had understood or viewed what the world had to offer in the same light as you had — placed those offering as high on a pedestal as you had. An emotion that you had not felt so much of in ages bubbled up in your throat, as though there was so much that you yearned to say, but the weight of your tongue would not allow it to spill so haphazardly.

You felt exhilarated. Exhilaration you couldn't contain, so you disregarded the hamper in your mouth and allowed those retained words to soil your clothes.

"I-it was like, in that moment, even with my fingers so stiff from the cold, when I watched the snowfall melt on my skin I felt... everything?" Your words tilted in question, before you decided that what you spoke was the truth. Whether it made any sense didn't matter at all. "Everything all at once, it was pure rapture. As if being there in that second, hour, and day to witness the miracle of literal fucking ice falling from the sky meant that it didn't matter whether I lived or died because simply being there, then, a part of this universe was enough. Whether I did something abstract with my life or spent it in the slums was arbitrary, because in the end I held that snowfall for myself. My joy. Not anyone else's, it was me."

All was quiet once your proclamation had came to a close, and Armin gaped while Marco gazed at you with an admiration full of affection. You heeded their expressions and abashedly cleared your throat. "But, uhm, anyway..." You continued and moved to begin the last section of Armin's hair.

Armin's pending eyes moved to his lap, before they flickered towards the brunet that sat on Sasha's bunk. He seemed to be pondering a thought that he wasn't sure he should elucidate or not. After a few moments of strenuous silence, he began, "Can you guys keep a secret?" He asked hesitantly.

You looked to your friend, still sat comfortably with his arms supporting his weight, with questioning eyes briefly before you settled your gaze on the blonde once again. "Sure." You admitted.

"Of course." Marco reassured.

The boy inhaled deeply, as if steeling himself was necessary in order to utter his next words. "Do you know about... the sea?"

His foreign words had caused your head to cock in perplexity, "The sea?" You repeated.

Marco hummed, "I'm almost sure that I've heard you talk about it with Eren before, though I feel that it's rude to eavesdrop." He added.

You chuckled, "Of course you would, Mr. Nice guy." You teased, to which the boy rubbed his neck with a sheepish grin.

"Yes, the sea!" Armin exclaims, "It's the reason I'm here, as a cadet. You guys probably won't believe me, but the sea is a huge body of salt water." He beamed.

Your brows furrowed, for his words had rung no bells in your mind. Though, they had raised alarms that blared at you to tread carefully. "Wait, salt water? As in, merchant salt?" You reiterated.

He bobbed his head enthusiastically, "Mhm! But, it's so big that merchants can spend their entire lifetimes attempting to remove it and still wouldn't even come close to rendering it empty!" He vehemently informed you.

"What?!" Marco freaked in his seat, his brown eyes as wide as saucers.

You hastily moved yourself to stand directly before the blonde and firmly placed your hands atop his shoulders. "Armin, say that again." You urged. Your ears couldn't believe what they had heard.

"I know! It sounds crazy, but it's true! I know that it's somewhere beyond the walls with other places we couldn't ever think to imagine exist. I haven't even told you about the fire water, or the lands of ice, or even the fields upon fields of sand!" He added brightly. The fascination in your eyes did not allow you any other option than to believe his words ring true.

It was then that you realized just what it was in him - that wide eyed dreamer that you had met serendipitously in your time as a cadet - that had reminded you of your Cielo.

It was the way in which he viewed the world in wonderment; as if he had worshipped all that the world he was born into had to offer him. It was a sentiment mirrored in your own irises, as well.

He treasured life, or rather, the things that came with it.

"Fire water? Lands of ice?" Marco repeated incredulously, for his mind seemed to have the same amount of trouble conceiving such ideas as yours did.

"Armin, where did you hear about this?" Your eyes pleaded for his answer.

While you were sure his words had registered in your cerebrum, it did little to aid in the construction of the scene they painted behind your eyes. Fire water was otherworldly even in its name, could it be liquid or plasma? If you dipped a palm in, would your fingers grow wrinkly or charred? How would it form? Would it be tangible? What variety of colors would it present itself in? Not to mention the fields of sand? Where would such a thing even originate from?

"My grandfather had a book stashed away with a plethora of ideas such as these. When we were younger, Eren and I would spend all day looking at the pictures." He explained.

"A book?" Marco tittered lightheartedly, "Armin, anything detailing the outside world is illegal. No MP is gonna come knocking on our door, are they?" He jested.

Armin gasped at the notion, "No! I swear, they won't. Don't worry, Marco." He reassured.

"Well, I was joking, but thanks for the confirmation anyway."

"Do you have it with you?" You asked.

The blonde's brows met and he gazed at you sympathetically, "No, not anymore. I'm sorry, it's back in Shiganshina." He informed you.

You hid your disappointment well, though you knew that Armin did not require physical hints to understand your feelings. "Oh." Was all that you replied.

"That's okay, though. Right, Y/N?" Marco suggested.

"Yeah, of course, it's just that..." You trailed off, before your lowered gaze lifted itself back onto the catalyst of the incoming downpour restraining itself in your still young body. "Armin, are you sure that this is the truth?"

"Well, that's what I'm hoping to find out once I join the scouts. So that one day, I'll get to see it for myself."

You were hesitant, it was as clear as the night sky after a sweltering summer day. You pondered if your question was truly worth asking, before you determined that your body would not allow itself to rest so easily if it went unanswered.

"Armin..." You uttered weakly, to which the boy in question hummed attentively and your brows knitted with apprehension. "You're willin' to risk your life for a dream? A dream that you're not even sure truly exists?" It was patently such a genuine question, for the notion was inconceivable to you.

He wasted nothing but his breath in replying, "That's the thing! It's not just a dream, it's more than that. So much more that I can't even begin to explain. I guess I've never been well with words." He chuckled sheepishly before earnestly contemplating his reply. While he knew it would bear value, you had great doubt that he had ever truly comprehended the weight at which it would tug at your heart in the near future. "It's as if there's a part of me that demands it. A significant part that I can't bear to ignore, because doing so would be ignoring myself. I could never treat myself that way, and I'd even go as far as to say that I pity anyone who does." He stated fervidly whilst his bright lazurite eyes shone with as much verity as a pastor citing the gospel. "So yes, I'd be willing to join the scouts if it means seeing what's beyond the walls."

His words had snapped you out of a daze that you couldn't remember when you had entered. It prodded at your bare soul and cried out, as if your inner self had just registered how unjust it had been treating itself and would allow it no longer; causing a turmoil to ravel itself further in their chambers.

"The scouts... the outside world." You muttered absentmindedly.

If what Armin had shared with you happened to truly exist, you feared that fact would change more than you wanted it to. The mere possibility forged a newborn pavement road in your vision of the future. A path that your heart called for, but if you acquiesced and indulged, that would mean sacrificing your long term goal.

"Well, when you do find it - go ahead and send us an invite alright? We'll travel all the way from the king's side just to see it." Marco insisted, never being the one to dim anyone's light, even if he didn't fully believe the proclamation.

"Of course!" Armin agreed, before he attempted to peek at the length of his hair. "Oh, are you finished, Y/N?" He asked.

"Oh, yeah. You're all done. Sorry if it isn't perfect, I'm learnin' as I go."

His head shook rapidly, "No, it's better than perfect! Thanks a lot, you've got a really handy skill. I've never seen anyone wield a blade as proficiently as you."

"No problem, and this is free of charge Armin, so there's no need to flatter me." You jested, and then looked towards the brunet at your side. "You ready?"

Marco nodded in confirmation and both boys traded spots with a slight bounce to their steps, you delighted at their infectious demeanors, "So, what'll it be today sugar?" You asked.

"I don't need much done if I'm being honest. These front pieces are just about to reach my eyes though and I really don't want that. It's probably a job I could have done myself, but I don't trust my inadequate skills." He chuckled at his admission.

"That's alright, this shouldn't take long at all." You said and began to stroke your fingers through the short strands you aimed to cut, for preparation.

"So, you're an outdoors kind of gal?" He asked suddenly.

Though it was an unexpected observation, that didn't thwart the formation of your fond smile. "Yeah, nature is beautiful. I can't help but to admire it."

"I can see that, that's admirable in itself as well, you know? Life is a beautiful but fickle thing."

"Fickle?" You asked, one of your brows bent with interest.

He nodded as best as he could have without causing you to accidentally nick at his skin. "It's transient, and the role we live in can be snatched away in an instant. I can't imagine living it in any other way than chasing our dreams. Otherwise, what's the point? Was all of it for naught?" He explained.

You hummed softly, "Perhaps it's far more complicated than that."

"I think it's as complicated as you make it to be." He suggests without doubt to his words.

Your brows furrowed in contemplation once more, for what he said had made sense to you, but of course you chose to stubbornly deny to accept the insight and clung onto the thread of fate coiled around your throat. Marco saw how heavily you struggled with your own self, however he recalled how that had always seemed to be the case when it came to you.

You had always been locking horns with a miscreant you yourself had concocted.

"My point is - life is short. Make of it what you can, and if that means chasing something you see as intangible, then that's all the more reason to keep trying. A reason to live." He continued even when the furrow in your brow had only seemed to deepen. "What is life without a destination, and what is a destination without some sense of accomplishment? You never know what chapter is on the horizon."

"I don't want a strange author dictating where my life goes and what I accomplish." You stated as the mere thought of such an idea brought distaste to your tongue.

You were reminded of Stefan and Cielo.

What kind of author had written and devised their deaths for the sake of accomplishment? Not one you were willing to adhere to.

You were no Icarus and would not bear to allow yourself to burn for ephemeral bliss by gliding far too near the sun. It was inconceivable to you.

Marco merely laughed in the way that made his head move from side to side, the same way you had every time you had caught Sasha purloining food from Connie's tray at lunch. "Silly. You are the author." He rebutted with shaking shoulders.

Your fingers grew stiff and subconsciously withdrew themselves from within his dark hair. Your breath was nowhere to be found, and even your chest had halted its rise and fall. You were caught entirely off kilter, not having expected him to have a rebuttal on hand. Though, you supposed it was more so how correct he was that caused you to enter a state of stupor.

Marco's words were nothing but the truth — you had the baton to conduct the ensemble of your life. Dictating its path, one that could either bring your disgustingly selfish and vindictive goals to reality, or allow you the ability to feel free; to experience eternal bliss.

You, who is forever fizzing, frothing, buzzing, and exploding at your core. You, a human, who is bubbling over and blooming wide. You, who is your own solar system, galaxy, and universe. You, the conductor, the orchestra, and the choir. You who would be eternally grateful if all you held was yourself, the trees, the skies, and the seas — that would be enough. Whether you stood over the corpse of a mere MP or a million Titans was insignificant.

Your voice was raw, raspy, and true. "What I would pick wouldn't make any sense. You'd think it's stupid, hell, I think it's stupid. Which is why I won't go down that route."

Marco remained quiet once more, presumably to collect his own thoughts, to choose and pluck them individually. His head tilted to find your lowered gaze as he told you, "It doesn't have to make sense to anyone but yourself. If simply being happy is what brings you peace, then that's a good enough reason to listen. Forget needing or deserving, do you want it?"

You did, more than you had ever wanted anything else in your life. "It doesn't matter if others don't agree, they aren't you. You're allowed to make your own mistakes, you might even find that there are none."

Your head shifts to the side and you release a sigh of defeat. Though, unfortunately, not towards Marco. It was an exhale of submission to the implacable voices in your mind that thwarted your ability to pursue anything other than what you carved in stone on the day of both Stefan and Cielo's deaths. Mere words of affirmation would never be enough to spur you into an alternate direction.

For the sake of your future, you wished they had been.

"It's convoluted." You determined with a wince. "I'm sorry to waste your wisdom." You said as your disheartened gaze met his tender and empathetic one.

Those raw umber eyes had told you they understood, and although you knew it was quite impossible for that to be true, you believed their whispers.

"Nothing could ever be wasted on you, Y/N." He assured.

You chuckled at his habit of making it his priority to dispel any worries his peers might have created for themselves, "Charmer." You teased lightheartedly.

You had wished to be even the slightest bit as optimistic as Marco had always presented himself as. The thought of his mien being a sort of veil had occurred to you, perhaps the boy hadn't truly believed his own words and simply uttered them with the hope of speaking them into existence. A wish to change the future.

Or perhaps he had thought them to be true, and in that case, you knew you could never compel that mindset to be your own.

"Alright, this marks the end of my coiffeuse career, for today at least." You announced as you completed the final snip of bark colored hair.

"Wow, thanks so much for entertaining our abrupt visit! You're amazing, Y/N." Armin praised vehemently.

"I am, aren't I?"

"Not too much commending for this one, Armin. Her ego inflates as rapidly as Jean's does." Marco jested as he ruffled your hair, "Look, her head's already grown and you've barely begun your applause."

Your eyes rolled at his obvious taunting, "As if yours isn't ten times worse." You goaded in return. "Anyway, I'll walk you two out. If you don't mind, I'd love to return to my attempts of peaceful slumber and I still have to clean up."

"Kicking us out already?" Marco feigned offense.

You laughed at the notion, "If I don't, Armin will chew all of his nails off by the time he musters up the courage to dismiss himself." You gestured to the blonde who, ironically, was doing just that.

"I feel like I'm invading a space that I shouldn't be." He muttered in embarrassment.

Marco guffawed at his discomfort, "Alright, let's go before you bite your fingers off." He agreed and led your group towards the door where he took ahold of the knob and twisted.

But, before he allowed himself to leave you to your midday napping, his hand hesitated on the glossy metal. His brows furrowed and an expression hindered by his pensive thoughts formed on his soft features. Before you could have uttered any word of concern, he spoke what you had assumed to be the thoughts plaguing away at his mind.

"Y/N, you're allowed to take your time. Especially so considering how young we are, but... if I may?" He asks and you couldn't tell whether his hesitance was caused by mere caution or scruple. "Life as we know it ends, at some point. And in many cases, it's highly unexpected."

You hadn't heeded how adept the freckled boy was at reading people, or perhaps it was you specifically that he had grown accustomed to that had allowed him to peruse your soul so easily. Conversely, the thought that maybe you had always simply worn your emotions on your chest and laid them all bare was what had permitted the boy to skim your thoughts.

You never responded and you doubted he had ever expected you to, though you wish you had, for perhaps future emotional turbulence could have been avoided if so.

So, he proceeded with his departure, though as soon as the door knob twisted and unveiled what awaited you on the other side, the gush of polar and dampened wind fled into the cabin alike a cold bucket of water.

"Ack!" Marco grimaced at the alteration of atmosphere. No longer had he felt cozy and safe, instead his shaking bones curled in on themselves to shield his body from the chill that invaded your senses.

"Oh wow, it's raining!" Armin examined.

"How didn't we notice that before?" You asked as you braced yourself to step out onto the wooden porch. Your sock clad feet felt the moisture instantly, though the temperature only spurred you to inch closer to the railing. After a deep inhalation that cleared your head, you surmised, "It smells like it's gonna rain all day."

Armin takes it upon himself to stick a palm flat in the air not shielded by the large awning that thwarted the water from meeting your heads. "Oh, but it feels very refreshing." He announced with a fond smile as he stared at the droplets that littered his hand.

"There are already so many puddles, I wonder how long the rain has been here for. It wasn't here on our way to the cabin." Marco wondered.

Mimicking the blonde's actions, your skin feels the frigid water that falls from the sky, the sensation not at all deterring your good mood. In fact, it seemed to have cleared your mind of any tussle of thoughts that sat on the forefront of your head.

Almost as if under a spell, Armin haphazardly stomped his foot into a small pool of water that had accumulated by his boots, soddening the pants of the boy beside him in the process, the blonde seeming to not know the reason why he did it, if the perplexity on his face had any telling of the truth.

"Oops, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to-"

Before the worried boy was able to complete his apology, his friend repeated his actions in retaliation, though he failed to notice that you too were in his range of fire. He didn't seem to have any regrets either way. Only amusement detected in his guffaw as you squealed at the sudden dampness of your pants.

Of course, ever the challenging spirit, you did not allow the misdeed to go unpunished, and even as you reciprocated, neither boy granted you the courtesy either.

Before you knew it, all three of you had somehow ended up out from under the awning and instead, under the open sky catapulting throngs of heavy droplets your way. Not halting the splashing and kicking of your legs further soiling your clothes, incautiously permitting the buoyant giggles and chortles to fill the air and irrigate the strands of your hair along with the rain. Not that any of you had cared.

In that moment, you weren't soldiers in training, awaiting the fortuitous day that you too would perish from the world you were born into. A world that was unjust, inequitable, and bore many secrets. You were dreamers who had came upon other dreamers on your paths toward your individual goals. Dreamers latching onto the feelings that allowed them to feel alive.

Or perhaps you weren't something as abstract as that, chasing a will to live. Maybe you were just kids.

Kids who grew to love mornings a little more after that day.

Fun fact: maia and arlo are both sick and honey is not helping.

[mysteriesmuse]

Houseboat Holiday!🌊⛴️☀️!

Sardines or Couch? 🐟🐠🛏️

The evening drew to and end quickly. With a lot of yelling, banter, whispered teasing between you and the greenette’s, another round of chocolate and the celebratory cast off. Now Masaru manned the ships wheel as the rest of you tried to organize your stuff. Naturally Mitsuki was taking charge, “ok well, Inko, Masaru, and I have already claimed two of the cabins. Since we’re short on L/Ns -“ she smirked as she gave you the side eye, “- we actually have a lot more room than normal.” “So?” The three of you countered. Inko finished her friend thought, “nobody has to -“

and the boys finished for her giving a wicked loud high-five, “No Couch!” “told ya’ they’d take it just fine,” you beamed. To be honest they’d already explained that they didn’t think the boys would even fit on that giant couch anymore. Sleeping arrangements in the houseboat were always tricky where there were 4 cabins, 3 families, and 9 people. Thus, the parents all had their own rooms. Then, that left the coveted 4th room for kids or the L-shaped houseboat couch. Now the couch usually went on rotations every other summer. The back of an old grocery receipt in the kitchen drawer kept record. It always flipped between you and your brother (the obvious arrangement), you and Izuku (the calmest arrangement) your brother and Katsuki (the corresponding option to everyone’s favorite option), and the most frequent option: Izuku and Katsuki. So their current enthusiasm was understandable, “Enjoy it while it lasts. I don’t know what we’re gonna do next year when the other L/Ns arrive with their cute little family.” In front of you Izuku gasped, scraping the sides of the hallway with his luggage, “That’s right! Shota-Kun and Mei have a little baby baby now.” In front of him Katsuki ducked into their shared room, “with a newly manifested quirk.” “oh yeah, what is it again y/n?” Izuku asked following Katsuki. You filed into the room across from them, door wide open as a chorus of zippers started unpacking, “well, it sounds like it may be some form of x-ray like my dad.” You clicked your tongue, chucking your bathing suits into a drawer. “Although we’re not really sure yet. That’s why they’re all together right now, to figure it out.” Izuku hummed from the other room, “I think it’ll be super cool to see if it’s the same quirk.” “Totally! Although Mei’s animal communication quirk with my brothers lasers makes it anyone’s best guess.” “They’ll figure out the squirts quirk eventually,” Katsuki grunted, “if they don’t send us over. Nerd and I can figure it out.” you hummed, “ Shota told me they’ll invite you over to come visit Yuto anyway, but the way it’s been going they might could use some professionals on the job.” “We’d love that! Right Kacchan?” A resounding set of squeaks followed by silence came from the room. You padded over to their doorframe. “we’re never gonna be able to sleep like this!” Izuku covered his face with a hand muttering, “oh man . . .” “Boys you’re officially the human embodiment of sardines right now.” Katsuki threw his hands up into the air jostling Izuku who just stared at him looking defeated, “nows not the time for er’ sass!”

Drumming your fingers against the wall your smile turned into a frown. Seriously? You hung your head before you shouted, “Hey! Aunties we’re gonna need the couch blankets for this trip after all!” ——— （´-`）.｡oO (real life representation of reader)

You’d heroically sacrificed your room for Izuku and settled into the couch hours ago. Now it was the dark hours of the morning when a captains change would happen. ——— Katsuki went about the boat as quietly as he could. Squeezing sideways through that squeaky-ass door and padding out into the living room where the indoors captain wheel was. he squinted his way around the place. Luckily you kids knew it like the back of your hands. Itd been ages since he’d last been on this boat. Last few summers were just him and Izuku busy doing hero training where here you were hanging out with your family. Going off to college and doing a heck of a lot of academia. You coulda been a hero too if you’d wanted, but ya’ never took an interest to it like him and Deku.

A figure stood up from a chair, “Waters easy, still drizzling out there so you can’t see much.” His dad slapped him on the back with a yawn, “see you in the morning light, son.” Katsuki was one of the best captains out of the collective families bunch. Eventually, he’d learn to pilot the whole thing by staying up late at night with Shota while your fathers whispered as they manned the ship. He’s a hell of a lot better at blackjack from those nights too. Makes hanging out at the bar more manageable with his other annoying friends. He grumbled out a, “Night pops’” before settling into the captains chair. “good to know I can still fit.” “g’d to know what?”

Katsuki turned around in a flash, well now his heart was racing. Damn it. “how’d ya? I was being quiet!” He hissed. you stretched like a kitten underneath an old quilt before curling back up into a ball. you waved a hand, hair falling down against your face, “heard ya’ change with your dad. Hmm, sorry to startle ya’ hero.” His ears turned pink, right. So even as a pro he couldn’t sneak up on you without waking you. So much for those stealth lessons from Aizawa. You wriggled deeper into the blanket, lips barely parting, “everyone back asleep now . . .” he sighed watching the familiar adolescent glint of a retainer in your mouth as your chest lightly rose and fall. A heart pulsing that only you could hear. A whole boat full of 6 different hearts that only you could hear from your hazy dream on the couch. An oceans worth of thumping hearts pulsing underneath the waves. He sighed, steeling his own, he’d forgotten to expect you’d wake up, “goodnight, senior.” in a minute you groaned flipping up onto your forearms to blankly stare at him, “give it a rest ��suki! And don’t laugh at your own joke. Don’t argue, I can hear it! Your heart picked up, you thought it was funny.” Katsuki poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue. He had to admit it was still funny, “alright alright, can’t help that you’re old.” he heard you flop down and flip over, “it’s a few days!” Oh, it was good to be back. “thanks for taking the couch.” “your welcome, you big baby.”

[echoesofadream]

no literallyyyyy I loved when he was rawr emo boy grr !! but now he is wealth wealth rich Justin Bieber going insane. I guess we should have seen it coming, considering his young debut age and big success ofc hed land in that weird space eventually... aw this Made me kinda sad actually like it was funny being like yucky greasy long haired sweaty gamerboy but actually hes just child labor ptsd crashdown era :(( maybe he can collab with vernon and make a cringey emo song and get motivated to become a rockstar instead of twitch streamer? *have u seen Vernons solo its. its uh im really embarrassed I will forever remember the review a mutual or something posted "the song/mv is like something I made up to make fun of him" lol...) oh my god im getting more and more stressed thinking about jungkook now... even tho im not following him super closely cause yeah I dont have time to watch all those lives cheesus I dont rlly like lives anyway unless theyre special like tea time w hao or jungkook drinking wine or the hilarious bts live the legendary one anyway.... many worries.... also I agree maybe drugs would be good for him? its best to suffer in swagfull ways if u should suffer but I fear he doesnt have enough swag like, technically its swag to be an alcoholic but Liam Payne of one direction is swagless so his alcoholism is cringe so I think maybe jungkook couldn't pull of drug addiction unless he like killed someone maybe or became a girlblogger ? hmm much 2 think about and im sooo tired im gonna sleep now zz goodnight echo -misa ofc

Hi hi good morning misa hope you slept well 💞

wait you’re right. This must be a really confusing time for him because he has everything he could ask for but all his members are doing different stuff and like what should he do? When hes been working for one goal since literally t h i r t e e n y/o literally a CHILD. Like he has strived to be an idol and the best and given everything he has, literally sacrificed his youth. Like i would be so lost. But it seems like maybe he is just chilling. Maybe he should keep the dog…

That said yesssss can he PLEASE make emo music I KNOW hes got it in him, he can make IU-esque ballads also, punk rock indie pop.. but he should become a rockstar.. well whatever he wants i mean i think he just needs direction.. baby boy… AKDJFK thats so funny i think i saw something similar that vernons* lyrics seemed AI generated but yours is even funnier. Yeah good idea. Also no I cant watch his like three hours lives no matter how much i love his voice id rather just listen to decalcomania 1 hour version than all those endless kareoke covers. Hmmm yes all the fics ive read where hes done drugs hes been in like a downward spiral and im afraid theres truth to that, i think he could possibly go overboard also especially if he needs the drugs to do music. And hmm he does seem to be drinking in those lives and idk how to feel about i mean its his life i just mean theres a difference between decadence and suffering artist. Not to self insert on my favorite kpop boy but i think he also has the addiction gene. Maybe he should stick to the dog walks and gym routines for the sake of his wellbeing and maybe just go be a twitch streamer if thats what he needs💔 i feel like hes got so much inside of him to let out but its stifled by the fact that hes a 20 smth (idfk) millionare whos been cut off from the outside world due to being an idol since literal childhood. ok wow this is depressing. :/ i agree he should kill someone, he needs new demons

*playing Sad girl by lana*

[buckys-black-dress]

see through

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

a/n: i dont have much to say other than that it's 1 am and i needed to get this out of my system. chapter 4 of play the game is underway, i promise. also, there will be a pov switch in this fic!

.・。.・゜✭・.���✫・゜・。. = POV change!

wc: 4.1k words

[ neighbor!bucky barnes x fem!reader ]

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

-

Every Friday night, without fail, you saw the light filter into your apartment.

Notice how you said night?

Yeah, it was almost two in the morning, by the way.

And why was there light coming through the chiffon curtains you had hanging on the rod above your window?

(Great choice on your part, by the way.)

Well, because of your neighbor.

You've seen him a few times, actually. Usually on the street outside your buildings, or just out and about. Never spoke to him, though. He was quiet, kept to himself. Didn't seem very friendly or willing to exchange a greeting if he ever saw you.

But you never took it personally. Maybe he was having a bad day. Every time you saw him.

But that's besides the point. The point right now is that you can see the lights blaring in your room. From the apartment across from yours.

Should it even be possible for light to travel that far? I mean, we don't even live in the same building. You think to yourself as you watch the colors dance in the dark.

You debate getting up and yelling out your window to tell him to shut that shit off or to invest in some blackout curtains. You were tired of sacrificing your sleep every week.

But then you decided against it, because you quite frankly could not be bothered to get up from the warmth of your bed. You'd tough it out for the night, but the next time you saw him, you'd have a few words for him.

-

The next morning, it was almost ten when you woke up. You didn't have your shift at the coffee shop you worked at until three, so you took your time in making your way out of bed.

You noticed the curtains of your neighbor's apartment were still open, but you could see his figure moving across the room. He was clearly on the phone with someone, and he didn't look too happy. You wondered what could have him so angry at such an early time of the morning. He seemed like a person who could use someone to talk to, someone who he could vent to.

But before you let your thoughts get ahead of you, you turn away from the window, heading back into your kitchen to eat breakfast and get ready for the long day ahead of you.

-

"Hi, what can I get started for you today?" You ask as brightly as you can muster at the moment. You were halfway through your shift, another three hours until close.

"Uh, just a large black coffee." The gruff voice says, and it takes you a second until you look up and look closely.

It was him.

"O-okay, that'll be $3.27." You say, and he hands you a five dollar note before grumbling,

"Keep the change."

"Thanks, and your name?"

He gives you a look that's asking, 'what the fuck do you need my name for?'

"For the order." You try and salvage your dignity, because it feels like the stare shrunk you to a speck of dust.

"James."

That's all he all but growls before turning back to find a seat.

As your coworker takes over the cash register, you grab the biggest cup and fill it with his desired coffee.

You try to not think about it too much, but the anxiety you feel rising up inside you and just calling his name to give him his coffee feels absolutely ridiculous.

"Are you just gonna stare at the cup or give it to the customer?" The voice of your coworker, Jenna, rings in your ears and you look up at her, snapping out of the trance you were in.

"Sorry, I'm just a little out of it today, I guess."

"Everything alright?" She asks, and you nod.

"I'm fine, it's just... that's my neighbor." You nod your head towards where James is sat, in the corner by the window as he watches the raindrops run down the expanse of the glass.

"The one who doesn't let you sleep?"

"Yeah, but I don't think he'd take it too kindly if I tell him about that. He seems to have a lot on his own plate anyways," You explain, and she just nods.

"Well, that sucks, but you still need ta' give the guy his coffee." Jenna smiles and walks back to what she was doing before.

You gently slide out from your spot behind the counter and walk to his table.

"Here's your coffee, James. Enjoy, and- uh, let me know if you'd like anything else." You tell him while placing the steaming cup in front of him.

He murmurs a thank you that you barely catch, but you don't quite have the time to sit and wait for more of a reaction.

For the next several hours, James sits right where he was. He doesn't do anything in particular, either. He just watches outside, as the rain continues to pelt down on New York City, and as people come and go from where they were.

Eventually, about an hour left until close, you offer another cup of coffee.

"Do you want a refill? On the house." You ask gently, waiting to see if you'll get brushed off again.

"Uh... are you allowed to do stuff like that?" He asks, and you're a bit taken aback at the sudden concern.

"I don't think you should worry yourself too much, James. Free coffee's free coffee." You smile lightly, and grab the cup before filling it up without his confirmation. You could tell he wanted to say yes but didn't want to seem rude.

"You didn't have to..." He grumbles, and you simply shake your head.

"I know, but you've been here a while, and what kind of employee would I be if I let a customer sit here without any sustenance?" Your lips ply into a tiny smirk, trying to get him to loosen up a bit.

He seems so guarded, defensive. Like any moment, he's ready to run if need be, you inspect to yourself.

"You'd just be a regular employee, Y/N." He says, but the way he says your name makes a shiver run down your spine; and you can't tell if it's a good or bad one.

You unconsciously look down at your name tag, pinned to your black apron that's branded with the café's logo.

"Well, I felt like being nice. I hope you can deal." Your voice comes out short, but he knows you mean no harm.

As you walk back to the counter, you see a small smile playing on his lips, but he doesn't allow it to manifest on his face. You take that as a small victory for your last hour of work.

(bucky's pov).・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

The girl who works at this café is annoying.

But she's got a nice smile. And she's nice to me, Bucky thinks to himself.

He sips on the new coffee you'd just poured for him, without his consent, he thinks bitterly.

But it was a nice gesture.

Why can't you just take a nice gesture?

Because your brain's been scrambled eggs for 70 years. You don't know what to think about anything these days.

He watches you fiddle with the espresso maker, cleaning it with a rag, which you then dip into a bucket.

You look extremely familiar to him, but he can't exactly pin where he's seen you before.

Bucky closes his eyes for a moment, trying to recall where he'd seen you, but for a moment, he comes up with nothing.

Ever since he's been living back in the real world, he hasn't been outside too much.

He goes on the occasional walk, or goes to the tower to see Steve and Sam.

But other than that, he spends a lot of time in his Brooklyn apartment. He watches movies that Steve suggests, or he invites Steve and Sam over to have beer and watch TV with him.

He hates how lonely it gets, though.

Bucky wishes that he had someone.

Someone who could understand.

And don't get him wrong, he loves Sam and Steve. They fill in the gaps in his days, and they make them better.

Sometimes, thinking about having something to do that day is what makes it. He likes having something to do, something to plan for for when his friends come over.

But it feels like a teeny, tiny part of his life is missing. A person shaped-hole in his heart.

But Bucky doesn't spend too long thinking about it, or it'll send him into a spiral about failure and how he needs to 'push himself to get out there more.'

Or that's what his therapist says.

"Hey, we're about to close, and we usually throw the pastries out at the end of the day. Do you wanna take these home, by any chance?" Your voice rings in his ears, snapping him out of the impending slippery slope of his lack of love life.

He hesitates to answer for a second, looking at the brown paper bag pinched between your fingers.

Bucky can tell you were nervous when you spoke to him. He knew he made you uneasy, and it killed him inside.

He hated that. He just wanted to have a normal conversation with someone. But everyone seems to know who he is.

Who he was.

"Uh, what is it?" He croaks, unsure of what to say at your gesture.

"It's a few cookies and a chocolate croissant."

"Sure, I'll take 'em." Bucky simply answers, watching as you hand the bag over with a soft smile and watches you walk back.

You sweep up the floor and put up all the chairs, except for the one Bucky's sitting on. You leave his table alone, and bid farewell to your coworker who was scheduled to close with you.

Bucky doesn't know what drives him to do it, but he gets up after he sees you walk out the door, and follows you home.

Damn, if you like a girl, you usually ask for her number or somethin'. Not follow her home to make sure she's safe, you idiot. Bucky's inner voice speaks and sometimes, he wishes it would just shut up because he knows he has no game nowadays, but this is all he knows to do.

He realizes the way you're walking is familiar, and not at all of the way he was supposed to be going. That made him feel a little better, less like a creep. He's about half a block behind you, and when you turn onto the same street he lives on, he's really confused.

Did you know he was behind you? Are you trying to play a trick on him?

But before Bucky can speak up or say something, you walk right past his building, and into the one right next to it.

All of a sudden, images of you right on the street in front of your buildings flash through his head. He's seen you because you're his neighbor. Bucky's seen you right there, getting ready to start your run through the neighborhood, or probably on your way to work, now that he's seen where you work.

But he feels like there's somewhere else he's seen you; somewhere familiar.

He shakes his head, wondering why he's so caught up in you. He thought you were beautiful, but he feels a pull to you that he's never felt with anyone else before.

Bucky's hands move to unlock his door, sliding the key in and twisting the lock open.

He enters, staring at his dark apartment. It's moments like this, when he spends a long day alone, that he wishes there was someone.

Someone to come home to, to hug, to kiss, to share dinner with.

Some to fall asleep with at night. Someone to keep the terrors of the dark away.

But there was no one.

And then his mind thought back to you. Your hair, your face, your warm hands that touched his while you passed him the brown paper bag of treats.

Bucky wishes he was man enough to ask you out. Not even that, just to talk to you. Have a normal conversation, to get to know you.

But that wasn't in the cards for him anytime soon, he thinks.

For now, he focuses on taking things one at a time. And right now, all he wanted was a nice, warm shower and to get at least three hours of sleep tonight.

He's in his room, forgoing the lights for now, before he looks out his window.

For a moment, he believes his eyes are playing tricks on him.

There's absolutely no way that you are standing right there, right outside his window.

Well, in your own apartment, of course.

And there's absolutely no way in hell that Bucky is watching you undress right now.

As soon as you pull off your top, Bucky turns around before he could get more than a peek of your black lace bra, and he feels a burn in the pit of his stomach.

He can't tell if it's shame, guilt, or arousal.

(y/n's pov).・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

You couldn't stop thinking about James all day.

After yesterday, you wondered why you couldn't shake this feeling about him.

He'd made it quite clear that he's not a people person. Or maybe he just wasn't a you person.

But again, you tried to not take things too personally these days.

Sometimes, you wondered, though, as you looked through your bedroom window to his some nights.

You imagined what it would be like, watching one of those movies with him at night. Making dinner with him. Having coffee in the mornings before work, wondering what he did for a living.

You chastise yourself for your thoughts, thinking that you were crazy for these ideas you were coming up with out of nowhere.

As you pull off your clothes to get ready for bed, you feel the same emptiness fill your heart when your head hits the pillow, and another day has gone by where you're all alone.

-

The next day, your shift was at ten in the morning so you were up early.

You took your time in rolling out of bed. The warmth of your duvet was holding you down, and you couldn't help take a peek out your window.

You see that the room facing yours is finally housing a body in the bed. In all the time you'd been living across him, you've only seen him on the floor.

You feel a warm flutter at that. Whatever reason led him to actually sleep in the bed last night was, you hope you played a role in it.

-

You make your way to the café, and although walking in the rain wasn't ideal, you made it, somehow.

You clock in and head to the register, ready to take the millions of orders that come in through the day.

"Hi- oh! Welcome back. What can I get you?" Your tone of voice made it clear you were surprised, but was trying to not let it show.

"Uhm, just the same as yesterday, and... Can I get a chocolate croissant?" Bucky's gruff voice tells you.

You ring him up, wondering if you should say something about him being your neighbor. Although, he didn't seem too keen on looking you in the eye right now, and you wonder if you did something to make him uncomfortable yet again.

He seems to have this issue quite often.

Little do you know, this time, it isn't because of you or anything you did.

Well, nothing you did on purpose.

Nothing you were aware of at the time.

Anyways, you tell James to go take a seat and that you'd be right out with his order.

"Here you go, James," you place the plate and mug on the table, and this time, when you hear him say something, you turn around with furrowed brows.

"Sorry, I didn't catch what you said." You apologize, waiting for him to repeat himself.

"I- nevermind, it was stupid anyways. You probably have to get back to work." He mumbles while looking back down at his pastry.

"James, whatever it is, you can tell me." You offer with a kind smile. "I can come sit with you during my break, if you don't mind?" A hopeful smile crosses your face.

"Uh, I- yes, yeah, that would be nice." He struggles for a moment, but finally nods his head in confirmation along with his words.

"Alright, James. I get off in an hour for my break." You simply tell him with a soft grin, and you can practically feel his eyes burning into you as you walk away.

The blush creeping up your cheeks also stays there until the remainder of your shift.

-

As you plop in the chair across from James, you inspect him for a moment.

He was attractive, you'll admit.

Okay, he was more than attractive.

"So, James, where are you from?" You ask, your own cup of coffee in front of you on the table.

"Well, I'm Brooklyn born 'nd raised. Never was a time I didn't live here. You?" His lip twitches, looking out the window fondly.

"That's nice. I moved here when I was nine, so I guess I've been here a while. But no matter where I go, there's nowhere like home." You smile.

"There really isn't, huh? This place is irreplaceable." He gives you a crack of another smile, and you find yourself yearning for more from him. Just a tooth, something.

"Well, do you live around here?" You ask, deciding to play coy. You wanted to see what he'd say.

"Uh, yeah, actually. Over on DeKalb and Clinton." He clears his throat, the hint of a smile on his face melting right off.

"Huh, that's so funny. I live on those streets too." You grin, waiting to see his reaction.

"O-Oh really?" James doesn't really know what to say without giving away that he knows where you fucking live.

"Yeah, isn't that funny? Which building?" You're pressing, and you know he knows, but you're having your fun right now.

"T-the uhm... I live in the Washington." He's now making zero eye contact with you, and you're close to breaking.

"What a coincidence! I live in the Oakley!" You're in a fit of giggles when his face drops, you just can't help it anymore.

"James, can I tell you something?" You ask in a coquettish manner.

"Yeah, I suppose you'll tell me even if I say no." He gives a tight smile as a joke.

"I don't wanna sound like a creep, but I knew you lived in the Washington."

"Oh," James releases a breath of relief, "thank God. I knew you lived in the Oakley, but I didn't wanna sound like a stalker either." He says.

You laugh, sliding a hand on top of his resting on the table.

"Y'know, you do this really annoying thing where you leave your movies running on full brightness on your TV, and I can see it through my windows at night." You laugh at the incredulity of the situation.

"Oh... I never even thought of that. I'm sorry, Y/N." He looks genuinely remorseful, and now you feel bad for any bad thought you've had about the man that lives across from you.

"It's alright. No big deal." Your smile does a good job of convincing Bucky that you truly weren't bothered by his actions, but he still felt bad.

"Y'know, maybe I could make it up to you?" He asks, and you feel a blush moving up your chest. "Like, maybe over dinner?" His voice is timid, you can tell by the way he tilts his head down while speaking.

"James," you slide your hand into his this time, your smaller one resting in his large metal one. "I'd love to go out with you sometime."

Before he could react, you stood up from the chair.

"My break's over, but I get off at 3." You lean down and pull a pen from your apron, scribbling your number onto a napkin. "Here."

You walk away before he could say anything, but there's something about him this time that you notice.

He's blushing, too. And he's smiling. A bright, white, blinding smile.

You think of that smile throughout your whole shift, until you see he's still waiting for you when it's time to go.

"So, do you like Chinese or Italian better?" He asks with a crooked smile.

-

bonus scene:

six months later

You and Bucky are laid across your bed, the TV blaring a movie that neither of you are paying attention to. Your head is resting on his shoulder, leg thrown over both of his, and his hand running through your hair.

"You wanna know somethin' doll?" Bucky asks, and you feel his chest rumble under your head.

"Yeah, everything okay?" You ask while leaning up on your elbow to get a good look at him, trying to gauge his mood.

"Everything's okay, just remembered something." He laughs, his hand moving to hold your jaw in it. You shivered at the touch, but smiled fondly at the action.

"When I first saw you at the coffee shop, that first day when you gave the free coffee and pastries... I followed you home."

Your brows furrow and it's clear that you were confused as to why.

"I wanted to make sure you got home safe, and then it turned out that you lived right next to me. So I went up to my apartment and wondered what I'd done right in a past life to have you live right next to me, and then I saw you lived right across from me." His face was tipped upwards, like he was replaying that night in his head.

"You followed me home just to make sure I was safe?" You asked in disbelief that he did something so nice for you, when at the time you thought he hated you.

"Of course, sweetheart. It was dark out and there 're some real jerks out there, y'know." One corner of his mouth lifts up in a soft smirk. "Didn't want anything to happen to ya."

You lean down and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, appreciating his gesture.

"I really thought you didn't like me back then, so this is a nice little secret you've been hiding from me." You giggle when he pulls you back in for a real kiss.

"Yeah, well, I don't think I could'a hated you if I tried, baby. You're too sweet. And at the time, I was still getting used to being out in the open without being a national security threat." You both laugh lightly, dropping your head down.

A moment passes where you bask in his words, letting them soak in. And then a thought hits you, and you can't help but become more curious. Now you need to know the answer.

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, hon." Now Bucky's brows are pulled together, and you reach up and smooth out the wrinkle with your thumb.

"Did you ever... see me doing anything in here? Like, I usually keep the curtains open, and even if they're closed, they're pretty see-through..." You trail off, giving him time to craft his response.

You have a feeling you know the answer, considering how he turns red like a tomato in an instant as words leave your lips.

"I... there was this one time, but I swear, I wasn't trying to peep on you or anything, it was the same day I followed you and I just so happened to look into your window, and you were getting undressed, but I swear, I turned away as soon as I saw what you were doing, baby-" He was rambling, trying to save himself from sounding like a complete creep after all he's just told you.

"Did you like it?" You ask, innocently, but he knew what you were trying to do.

"I-I- You were getting undressed, sweetheart, of course I liked it... are you kidding me?" Bucky's grasping for the words, trying to make you understand.

"Well... we could always recreate it, but maybe in the same apartment this time?" You cock your head to the side, your doe eyes stirring a feeling in his abdomen.

"I think that's an excellent idea, honey." Bucky's hands grasp your waist as you slide on top of his lap. "After all, I am a hands on learner."

-

fin. i hope you enjoyed!

[pagesfromthevoid]

Here to rep for TVDU -- It's gotta be Klaus Mikaelson and confessing your feelings to someone you think are asleep. She/her or GN whichever you're feeling~~

It certainly wasn’t unusual for her to end up in Klaus’s bed. Actually, it was such a frequent occurrence that she had several sets of clothes in his drawers and a toothbrush set aside simply for her. Two; three times a week perhaps she was there for one reason or another. Usually to help protect his family with her magic, sometimes to help him with the bit of chaos he liked to wreak on the city. But he would never admit how much he adored her.

Love was a trivial thing, and he had learned over time that it was a fatal weakness.

Tonight, however, was so different than their previous encounters. Tonight, she took too much from the other side —used so much of her magic that blood had cascaded down her face. But she insisted, pushing the limits until she collapsed. His enemies wanted his child, and she simply refused to let that happen. If it killed her, she’d help protect Hope the best she could.

He truly thought tonight was the night he would lose her.

Freya had tended to her as he paced outside, plotting his revenge. The witches would pay for the harm brought upon her tonight. For the harm they intended to place in his family. Love was trivial but Klaus was a fool to think he didn’t consistently kill for it. And he would kill for her if needed.

“She’ll wake in the morning,” Freya announced softly as she exited his bedroom. “She’s asleep now, but she’ll be fine, Nik.”

He didn’t respond, pushing passed his sister to enter his bedroom. The door slammed him as he stared at her in his bed —tucked safely into the blankets like she was simply sleeping soundly. But he knew better; the sleep she was experiencing wasn’t a willing one. Freya had calmed her the best she could, but as Klaus crossed the threshold of his room, he could see her stirring under the blanket.

A bit too aggressively, he yanked the chair in the corner to the side of the bed she slept on. He spent the next hour or so simply watching her breath, listening to her heart beat as her fitful sleep finally subsided, and she had calmed down. Klaus leaned forward, reaching to push her hair out of her face.

“You stupid girl,” he murmured, shaking his head. “I can’t believe you would die for me.” Of course, she was asleep. There was no response as he continued speaking. “I expect people to die for me —unwillingly. Necessary sacrifices for what I want. But you…you willing almost died for me. Sacrificed yourself for my family —my daughter. You stupid, stupid girl,” he reacted, his thumb running over her cheekbone lightly. “I will kill the witches who did this to you, love. If it takes the whole of eternity, I will.”

Klaus took a deep breath, leaning over to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. His lips lingered, hovering there for a moment as he whispered, “I can’t risk losing you; you have no idea how much I love you.”

He pulled back, straightening up as he stood. There’s a moment where he considers staying, but he decided against it as he walked to the door. No, tonight he needed to finish what the witches started.

“Klaus?”

His hand clung to the door handle, gripping it hard as he heard her stir.

“I love you too, Nik,” she whispered, her voice weak. “Please don’t leave.”

Klaus glanced over his shoulder, swallowing hard. “I almost lost you tonight.”

“But you didn’t,” she countered, attempting now to sit up. Klaus was at her side in an instant, pushing her back into the bed. Her hands reached up to hold onto his wrists. “I promised I’d protect your family, Nik. That wasn’t just because I like Rebekah and Elijah.”

He watched her closely, easing down onto the edge of the bed beside her. “You’re foolish, then.”

“If it’s foolish to love you, I guess you’re right to call me a stupid girl then.”

“It is incredibly foolish to love me.” She simply smiled though, reaching up to touch his cheek. Klaus leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. “I will keep you safe, love.”

“I know you will, Nik.”

[evilphrog]

Watching Wheel of Time without reading the books: Episode 6

I really liked this episode, but my husband hated it. He said that he couldn’t tell me why without major spoilers, but he was very Unhappy. We did spend some time laughing though, because his coworker has been sad that there was “no nudity” in the show (apparently Lan’s entire ass didn’t count) and now he got shadowy boobs in the background of the communal bathing scene. Thank you to this show for letting boobs obey the laws of physics instead of taping them up underneath to look like perfect globes at all times. Gravity exists. My only personal complaint about this episode was that there was too much Mean Girls reenactment and not nearly enough Perrin.

Aes Sedai High:

We started out on the little girl sleeping, and I said to my husband “yes, I am going to love this kid. I know nothing about her, but she’s my new favorite.” Then her dad called her Suian and I realized this is the girl you all have been obsessed with seeing. You are all correct, I fully get the hype now. Her dad is a lot like every good dad I’ve ever met, where he sees his kid do something dangerous, and he immediately lectures her but can’t quite resist telling her she’s also Super Impressive. Poor kid. I can’t tell if someone saw her right then, or if they had just suspected her for a while, but it must have made her feel some intense guilt to be a normal kid playing and then come home to her house burned down intentionally. Not sure why her dad couldn’t have gone with her on her journey. I am torn between being mad at him for making her go alone and impressed that he didn’t underestimate her just because she was his precious little baby. But yes, I love her, and love her even more as an adult.

The Aes Sedai lunch table is really heating up. Most of the politics stuff I kind of zoned out for. I have a lot of trouble following it all, but from what I can tell, it is forbidden for Suian to be in a relationship since she’s the queen, and JK Rowling was basically putting the two of them in a situation where they would be forced to either end it or be outed, because she wanted Moiriane out of her hair. Gosh she’s so the worst. Props to the actor who plays her for portraying such an intensely dislikeable character, but still making her three dimensional. Fucking “gold star lesbian” with a secret boyfriend she can’t admit to because she’s head of the Biphobic Misandry Club.

Had to laugh at Lan feeling their connection close for five seconds and immediately coming in like “Hey do you really have to mute our telepathic groupchat to go bang right now when everyone is plotting our deaths? Bros before hos, Moiraine!” And she’s just like “Lan, I haven’t had sex in two years, just do me a solid and babysit for a few hours, jfc.” Then she walks into the secret sex room and Suian tries to scold her but Moiraine is just like “I’m sorry, mommy, I’ve been a bad girl.” NDLRAI (Aes Sedai keysmash) guess I was wrong about Moiraine being asexual, but good for her. The fish-based pet names are further cementing my belief that the blues are the mathletes of this high school. Fucking nerds in love. I now have more context for her and Lan crying last episode. They are intentionally walking into a situation that has been prophesied to result in the death of all non-dragons. And both of them are exactly self-sacrificing enough to not step out when they have the option. Suian knows it too, and their scenes were so heartbreaking. I can’t believe we have a canon same-sex forbidden lovers plotline where the tension has absolutely nothing to do with them both being women. This fucking show means so damn much to me

Did Moiraine and Suian get married when they had their weird Spirit Stick ritual? It did not escape my notice that Suian told her to swear fidelity to the Seat, but Moiraine changed the words and swore fidelity directly to Suian. If they think their relationship is actually a secret, they are showing exactly the level of social awareness I have come to expect from Moiraine, because that was some X rated finger contact.

Village Polycule of Chaos:

Looks like my “the dragon is all 5 of them” theory is coming together after all. I mean, they have shared dreams, they can sense if the other is still alive, they all have nebulous magic powers, it just Makes Sense.

Glad Loial told Moiraine about where Mat and Rand were hidden (presumably) and I had to laugh when she told Nynaeve off for not coming for help sooner. She might be the only one who could get away with talking to Nynaeve like that, and only because they’re both in Worried Mom mode at the moment. This was the most Malcolm Reynolds move Moiraine has made so far. She could have easily just told Rand what she was going to do, but instead she just got annoyed that people weren’t doing the thing she told them to do. Rand being overpowered by Lan seemed a bit unlikely to me, unless he knew deep down that he needed to trust them. I mean, if the boy can bust down ironwood to protect Mat, there’s no way he couldn’t push Lan off him. That shit is dense as fuck. I guess leverage could be at play a bit, but that door was a minimum 5 times heavier than Lan. To me, it seemed more like he knew that whatever Moiraine did to Mat wouldn’t be worse than what he would have to deal with if she didn’t step in. He was just scared. Props to him for thanking her later on, and props to her for telling Rand how pure-hearted Mat actually must have been in order to fight off possession for so long.

This is Rand’s thing. He has very strong opinions, and makes snap judgments, but he’s quick to acknowledge when they were incorrect or unfair. I don’t know how anyone could dislike him. He just wants to protect the people he loves, and he doesn’t understand anything that lies outside that world view. He has an ego, sure, but that is how he can go through so much and not break down. He is able to rush into action without stopping to doubt himself because he is free from the burden of complex thought in the moment. Afterwards, he does take the time to stop and think about everything. Probably Perrin’s influence. He’s a sheltered kid who has only ever known love, safety, support, and community. He dedicated his life to showing that to all his friends. When he got thrust into the seedy underbelly of society, he only became more pure of heart. His default setting is Undying Loyalty, and there is no off switch. He trusts quickly, easily, and forever. He genuinely does not comprehend that anyone else would ever feel differently.

In contrast, Mat has always been in the seedy underbelly of society. He’s widely considered to be the irresponsible one of the group (at least by the rest of them) but I think he’s the most responsible one besides Nynaeve. He’s had a really terrible life, but most of the rest of the group seem entirely unaware of 90% of the struggles he’s faced beyond “Mat is poor.” They see him making self-destructive choices all the time, but he does that because he spends all his energy taking care of others and has none left to make sure he’s okay too. He consciously made a choice a long time ago to sacrifice his own morality and reputation so his sisters could have a shot at a normal life. Perrin and Rand clearly always try to help him, but they don’t seem to understand what he really needs. And he doesn’t know how to explain it to them, because their worlds are so different. Mat never grew up feeling a sense of community. He grew up being seen as the delinquent son of the town boozers, who was tolerated but not accepted, except for his body (RIP to whichever person on the show is responsible for making so many realistic references to this that apparently fly right over most people’s heads, I hope the success of this show means you can now afford therapy). So he loves his friends, but he doesn’t trust them. He can’t ask for help, because he’s never had the experience of being able to count on someone. He feels inherently less valuable than everyone around him, and even his closest friends constantly call him selfish and unreliable.

The show framed it like we were supposed to be shocked that Mat stayed behind, but it was the only choice his character could have made. He has been clear from the start that his priority is his sisters, and that he thinks he’s a weight around the rest of the group’s neck. He doesn’t believe he’s the dragon, so why would he jump through a magic portal to die alongside at least 3 of his best friends and the woman who just saved his life? No, he’s going to try his damndest to get home. Wonder if he might meet up with a certain gleeman who will be able to convince him to get to the eye of the world…perhaps through the power of love? Perhaps by being the first person who Mat has ever been able to count on to show him kindness without judgment, and to follow through on his promises? (No, I don’t think there’s even a passing chance that Thom is actually dead.)

Egwene was just waiting to make that badass bitch entrance. Oh, I happened to get something for you *mic drops fallen sisters’ rings* and btw I totally killed that guy. You’re welcome. I think she was hoping for a bit more praise than she got. She has an unrealistically positive view of the Aes Sedai, contrasting nicely with Nynaeve’s unrealistically negative one. Moiraine has to try to convince them both to dial it back a few notches, without accidentally reinforcing the other one’s beliefs. That is not an easy feat, especially for someone who struggles so much with conversations involving multiple people.

Egwene and Nynaeve had a fantastic dynamic when talking to Suian. Nynaeve thought they were gonna do a solidarity rejection and Egwene kept trying to get her to shut up because she’s focused on her career. This was an interesting break from what 90% of media would do, having Rand try and talk Egwene out of being an Aes Sedai. Instead, he was basically like “Yep, my best girl left me for a big city job but I love and support her through my heartbreak” and Egwene had the “Don’t treat me like a fragile little flower” conflict with Nynaeve. This show has a continued dedication to subverting gendered tropes and I scream every single time it happens. The difference in their views probably has a lot to do with the fact that Egwene chose her path as a Wisdom, while Nynaeve never had an option. She was raised into the life of a Wisdom from the moment she was adopted. I am actually now forming a backstory wherein the old Wisdom realized Egwene had power after that story about her fever, and wanted to bring her on as an apprentice. But Nynaeve fought hard to give Egwene a chance at a normal life, and to not start training her unless she freely chose it as an adult. I could see Nynaeve being frustrated that she worked so hard for the past 10 years to protect Egwene from being forced into a Grand Destiny, only to have her jump at the first chance to throw away her Normal Life.

Other episode reviews

[bestiesenpai]

Area 51 - Nanami Kento

This is for @natsuonii’s creature feature collab! :) It’s got alien!reader, scientist Nanami and a whole lot of weird shit I’d say. Femme reader...there’s alien pussy lol 9.8K words

link to the collab!

Content warnings: sex pollen, alien heat, reverse knot, daddy kink, blood + needle(it’s brief I promise) and random medical terms and fake science shit lol don’t look too deeply at it

“This...this is the best scientific breakthrough we’ve ever had.” Nanami was at a loss for words, watching as decked out military men brought in case after case of wreckage from a shot down spacecraft. Working at a highly secure government facility sure did have it’s perks, and being one of the first people to know about all this was certainly the biggest one.

Nanami had spent so much of his life studying and clawing his way to the job he was at now. He’d sacrificed so much in the name of science, in the pursuit of finding extraterrestrial life forms no matter how small and insignificant, and it was finally paying off.

“Doctor, we’ll take the embryos to your lab.” One of the men said, quickly walking away tailed by people holding glowing blue cases. He hadn’t really been briefed on what all was coming in and what exactly happened to get it here, but he was sure he would find out soon enough.

“Careful!” Another person shouted and he was pushed out of the way. Coming in through the large steel doors was what looked like a four armed monster strapped face down to a flatbed. Markings went up and down his face and body and there were an extra set of eyes staring at everyone as it was wheeled by.

“What is that creature?” Nanami mumbled, clutching his clipboard tightly. The creature was breathing hard through its nose, nostrils flaring dangerously wide and a light growl rumbled from its chest.

“It appears to be the leader of the spacecraft, we could only get the creature's name, nothing else: Sukuna.” Someone answered him, but Nanami didn’t acknowledge, he was unable to take his eyes off Sukuna.

“Incredible.” His mouth hung open like a fool, unblinking as he watched Sukuna be wheeled past him and to the elevator shaft. “How far down are they taking him?”

“I heard the chief say as far as they could. He’s highly dangerous, it was a miracle the team was able to get the upper hand.”

“I’ll have to pay him a visit soon.” Nanami had enough security clearance to go anywhere in the building, but something was telling him he’d have to ask for a lot of permissions first before making contact with Sukuna. Nanami learned quite early on that the deeper underground you went, the more power you needed to be there.

Once the final bits and pieces were brought into the facility, Nanami peeled himself off the wall and made the way to his own lab. With his badge hung proudly from his shirt pocket, Nanami made the descent and as the elevator went floor after floor and the numbers got higher and higher, he let some excited exhales out.

Going down the metal corridor, he came to his lab to see it teeming with people. Nanami often worked alone on things and to see so many people milling about in his space made him a little nervous.

“Tell me about the embryos.” Was the first thing he said when he entered, donning the white lab coat he’d left hanging by the door. Walking over to the giant test tubes lining the back wall, he peered into one of the open cases.

Nestled inside atop a pile of hay were glowing blue orbs, some too bright to look at directly. They had a light blue smoke coming off, gradually spilling out the sides of the case and if he looked hard enough Nanami could just barely see the outline of a creature inside.

“They were on the spaceship Sukuna came in on. He was hellbent on protecting them, killing five of our people right off the bat.” The military man he’d spoken to earlier was here, answering right away.

“Were they in a case like this?” Donning a pair of gloves, Nanami picked one up. It was cool to the touch and quite heavy, making the muscles in his arm work harder than expected to stay upright.

“No, he had them suspended in some type of thick goop, like clear maple syrup.”

“How scientific, thank you.” He snorted, setting the embryo back down. “Do you have any of this ‘goop’ left?”

“Only this, sir.” Holding up a capped beaker filled halfway with the fluid, the man let out a defeated sigh. “Sukuna actually swallowed most of it, I guess trying to keep the embryos from us any way possible. This stuff is crazy acidic though, it’s melted almost everything it comes in contact with.”

“This should be enough…” Already making calculations in his head, Nanami took the beaker and walked to the control panel of the test tubes. “Load up the embryos and I’ll try to mimic the solution they were in. In the meantime, I’ll put one in that should be similar enough to keep them alive for a while.”

Pressing a few buttons on the panel, the test tubes began to fill with a murky pink liquid, filling the air with a pungent aroma. The embryos were loaded in quickly and the tubes sealed off. Watching them as he walked over to a table full of supplies, Nanami grinned slightly at watching them float.

It took him little time to come up with the properties of the amniotic fluid the embryos had been in. Making slight adjustments to the formula, he watched the liquid go from murky to clear, with only a light pink tinge left.

As the days wore on, Nanami studied the embryos intensely, opting to sleep in his lab instead of the barracks provided so he wouldn’t miss a single change should any occur. Going days without sleep, a week went by without any significant change.

A soft tapping on glass roused Nanami from an impromptu nap. Drawing his head up from where it was nestled in his arms on the metal table he was slumped over, he rubbed his face roughly and looked around.

“Who is it?” He called, assuming it was someone at the door. But when no answer came and the door wasn’t opened, he fully sat up and looked around. “Where the hell-” Cutting himself off as he looked at the test tubes, Nanami almost fell out of his stool.

In the seven test tubes lining the wall, there were three embryos that had come to term. He knew some would fail, resigning himself to the possibility that all of them would, but to see three newborn aliens was beyond his wildest expectations.

“Oh my god.” Snatching his clipboard off the table, Nanami rushed to the test tubes. He was writing furiously, capturing every single detail he saw about them and even making quick sketches of what they looked like.

There were little nubs right above their behinds, what looked to be the beginnings of a tail. All of them had two sets of eyes, unopened and tiny on their infantile faces, faces that were beginning to bear the same marks Sukuna had.

The tapping on the glass, Nanami quickly found out, was from them floating freely in the tubes, softly knocking against the glass as they hung suspended in the fluid. Nanami couldn’t see any kind of umbilical cord or method to get them the possible nutrients they needed to stay alive. So he just had to hope that they woke up soon to tell him what they needed.

The babies rapidly took shape after coming to term, morphing into a human-like form right before Nanami’s eyes. It seemed that with every couple of hours that passed they grew more and more. Fingers, webbed toes, tufts of hair and tails all appeared.

“So when do you think they’ll be able to come out?” His supervisor asked, nearly a month after the first encounter. The aliens under Nanami’s care looked like full fledged adults, ones that you could see out in public and - despite a few glaring differences - not pay any mind to.

“I don’t know, ma’am. I don’t know if they can survive out here.” In the month that passed, the facility wasn’t able to get any intel from Sukuna about the embryos or why he chose to come to Earth. All he did was snarl and growl, slurring a few death threats when he could.

“Take one out and see.”

“What?” Gasping loudly, Nanami’s eyes went wide. Surely his boss didn’t mean for him to sacrifice one of them? They were too precious of an asset to possibly let die like that and Nanami was ready to put his foot down.

“Don’t worry, doctor, Sukuna’s told us a bunch of times that more of his people will be coming, and I’m willing to bet they’ll have more embryos for us to study.” Giving him a swift pat on the back, his boss turned on her heel and started to walk away. “The usual assistants will be here to help you should you need anything and don’t feel bad if they all die, that’s just how these things go.”

The parting words were less than heartwarming. Letting out a rough sigh, Nanami turned to the team of people behind him. They worked with him before, most of them idolizing him with a gleam in their eyes.

“We’ll wheel in the examining table and take them out one by one. If there’s any adverse reactions, I’m sure we’ll be able to handle it. Get the usual supplies ready, we’ll start in ten.” Giving the group a curt nod, Nanami turned back to the test tubes. Pressing his hand onto the glass of one, he closed his eyes. “God, I really hope you all don’t die.”

In ten minutes, Nanami was dressed in full hazmat gear and so was his team. The crinkling of plastic suits was loud in the otherwise deathly silent room as everyone held their breath. Draining the fluid of the first tube, Nanami swung open the door.

“Let’s take a look.” Nanami said as the body was lifted onto the table. It had no external sex organs to speak of, not even a hole for a cloaca. Cool to the touch, Nanami waited for it to show any signs of life.

“It’s not moving.” Someone called out after five minutes, scribbling it down on the notes. They’d tried everything, strapping an oxygen mask over the face, chest compressions and returning the body back to the fluid it had previously been in, but it was no use.

“Take that away to Getou’s lab, he’ll dissect it.” Waving the first body away, Nanami looked up at the second. “We need to instill a gradual change in environment or else the same thing will happen.”

“Should we try to set up a feeding tube or an IV?”

“IV, yes.”

The second attempt went marginally better than the first. Slowly shifting the fluid to one of a normal human amniotic fluid seemed to work. The alien twitched and rocked side to side, seemingly waking up from its slumber.

Drawing it out from the tube, it appeared to be just fine. Gasping for air, fluttering eyelids and squirming limbs - all things Nanami wanted to see. What he didn’t want though, was for the creature to lash out with unexpectedly sharp claws, cutting through the sleeve of his suit and drawing blood.

“Holy shit!” Stumbling back, Nanami watched in horror as the creature licked the blood from its nails. Smacking its lips together, the creature pointed at him. It was rapidly losing the color in its cheeks, struggling to form whatever words it needed.

“Blood? Do you need human blood to survive on this planet?” Nanami shouted, scrambling away from the table he’d flung himself onto and holding out his arm. “Take it! Quickly!”

“Doctor no!” A few of his assistants tried to yank him away from the examining table. They didn’t want to see the blood get drained from his body or him possibly get eaten by the creature.

“Stop it, let me do this!” Struggling with them, Nanami watched in rapt horror as the creature nodded slowly before fully collapsing on the table, drawing it’s last shaky inhale before falling limp entirely. “You fucking idiots, we just lost another one!” Pushing the people away, Nanami banged his fist angrily on the table.

“Doctor, we couldn’t let you do something so dangerous! You’re the most valuable scientist here, we can’t lose you!”

“Bullshit! I don’t care if the next one wants to swallow me whole, you let it!” Glaring at all the people in the room, Nanami began to rip his gear off. “And if it dies for any reason, I’m going to make sure none of you ever find work again.”

With the threat hanging heavily in the air, Nanami stormed over to the control panel one last time, punching in the codes needed to change the fluid on the remaining test tube. His arm was slowly leaking blood and he could feel the warmth drip down to his hand.

“Get me an IV, I’m going to give this last one a blood transfusion.”

“Doctor, are you sure you-”

“If you question me one more time I’ll cut your tongue out. Now do as I say.” Pulling up a chair, Nanami sat down and leaned his head against the cold glass of the tube. None of this was going as he wanted; Nanami didn’t plan to lose two out of three creatures, nor to give blood to the last one.

Hooking up an IV, Nanami watched the blood drain from his arm, flowing up and into the top of the test tube where there was a needle inserted into the last alien. Trying not to get too woozy as he was drained of blood, Nanami pressed his forehead to the glass and squeezed his eyes shut.

“I don’t believe in you but God if you’re out there, please make this work.”

“Doctor?” He wasn’t sure when he passed out, but when Nanami came to, he had a crowd of people gawking at him.

“Yes? What?” The IV was out of his arm and there was a blanket over him and as he tried to get out of his chair he nearly fell.

“L-look behind you.” Pointing with a shaking finger, the assistant that woke him up turned him to face the test tube.

“Why do you all look so-” Turning around, Nanami stumbled back, for once grateful to have someone else in the lab to catch him. “Scared?” Whispering out the last word in a high pitched voice, Nanami couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

The once nondescript alien in the tube was now a fully fledged human being. With complete and fairly dark markings on their face, breasts and a vagina, the creature before him could be mistaken for any other adult.

And the thing that was most shocking was the way all four eyes honed in on Nanami, tracking his every move. Pressing it’s forehead and hands to the glass, the creature turned as Nanami walked side to side.

“It’s been watching you since you passed out.”

“How long has it been like that?” He asked, getting closer to the test tube.

“It just suddenly changed shortly after you lost consciousness. A flash of light went off and poof, it looked like that.” Pressing his hand to the glass, Nanami let out a breathless laugh as the creature scurried back only to return in mere seconds.

“Open the tube, we have to let it out.” Unable to take his eyes off the creature, Nanami could hardly wait for all the fluid to be drained before opening up the test tube and helping the creature out. Surprisingly steady on its feet, Nanami barely had to help it stand upright.

“Hello.” He smiled, shrugging off his lab coat and placing it over its shoulders. “Welcome to Earth.”

“Hello.” You said back, attempting to smile as well. “Welcome to Earth.”

When Nanami first got the embryos, he wasn’t expecting anything to come out of them. The most he thought would happen was possible growth but never any of them coming to term and certainly never of them to actually be able to communicate.

It appears you were destined to prove him wrong, however. Nearly the moment you stepped out of the test tube, dripping in fluid and with a long tail you couldn’t quite control, you exceeded all of Nanami’s expectations - not that he even had any to begin with, especially not when it came to taking you out of the tube.

The first hour, you were sitting perfectly still while the team ran tests on you. Pressing a cold stethoscope to your chest, a few of them got a giggle out of the way you gasped and squirmed. Nanami watched it all happen, taking calculated notes and even doing some of the tests himself.

“What’s your name?” He questioned after another hour of hearing you repeat the phrases around you. Staring at him from the stool you were perched on, you tilted your head. It was only you and him left in the lab now, he sent everyone else away, wanting a chance to study you on his own.

“What’s your name?” You parroted back, mimicking the way Nanami had his arms crossed over his chest.

“My name is Nanami Kento. What’s yours?”

“Nanami Kento.” He made a disgruntled sound in the back of his throat, rolling his eyes at the giggle you let out. He understood he was dealing with an alien, one that might never be able to fully communicate the way he desired, but he wanted to get somewhere.

“What’ll it take for you to stop copying me?”

“Reading a book.” He’d meant it as a rhetorical question, and hearing your voice form a stilted sentence all on it’s own was a big surprise. Nodding curtly, Nanami walked over to a set of bookcases and grabbed a thick dictionary and a thesaurus, placing them onto the table next to you. Flipping open the first page of the dictionary, Nanami pointed at the words.

“Can you read these?”

“Mhmm!” Leaning over, your eyes scanned the script.

“Good, read all of it and tell me when you’re done.” Setting up a chair on the other side of the table, Nanami fixed a pile of notes and other documents he needed to work over. He could take time to catch up his reports while you-

“Done!” Slamming the dictionary closed, you picked up the thesaurus. “I have to read this too?”

“Y-yes.” Nanami’s mouth hung open slightly as he watched you speed through the second book. He expected this whole process to take an hour at least but you were done with both books in just a few minutes.

“All finished.” You were still a little unsure of forming sentences, lifting your voice in slight question at the end.

“How did you do that so fast?”

“When Mother made us, she gave us all the information she could on this planet, including rudimentary language. I just needed a way to conceptualize actually speaking on my own.”

“Who’s Mother?” Grabbing his pen, Nanami began to scribble down what you were saying.

“Mother is the one that made us. All of us, me, my companions, and Sukuna too.”

“Right…” Nanami’s hand hesitated at the mention of Sukuna, drawing inky swirls in place of words. “Then Mother is the one who sent you here with him?”

“Yes! She said that to take over this planet, we would need to assimilate to the environment and that we’d need a strong warrior to protect us.” You had a dreamy look in your eyes, no doubt thinking about Sukuna. “So far I like this-”

“Hold on, take over the planet?”

“It’s what my people do: we come to a planet, impregnate the population and take over.” He was sure there was more to it than that but for his own peace of mind Nanami didn’t question it further. For now, he wanted to focus on the positives, mainly the one of you finally speaking on your own.

“So…” Nanami struggled to find the next topic of conversation.

“Oh, I remember my name now! It’s (Y/N).”

“Did Mother also give you that name?”

“She did!” You truly looked overjoyed to be talking about all this. The smile on your face led to Nanami being able to see the sharp canine teeth in your mouth, akin to a set of teeth he��d find in a vampire movie.

“So (Y/N), I have a question. I gave you my blood so you’d be able to live on this planet.” He paused to make sure you were following along. “I want to know why you’re a female when you received male donor blood.”

“Mother determined which gender would be useful for me to have on this planet, so all I needed was your DNA to complete the transformation and become a human.”

“Mother thinks humans have those extra eyes and a tail?” Nanami snorted at that, there were too many things to give away your unhuman origins that couldn’t be ignored.

“Sukuna is supposed to teach us how to hide them until we need them.” Your shoulders visibly slumped and you looked around. “Where is he? He was supposed to be here when we woke up.”

“He’s somewhere else-”

“Where? Where is he?” Putting both palms flat on the table, you leaned forward. You seemed desperate, your brows scrunching together as you worried your lip. “I can tell he’s close, but where is he exactly?”

Nanami heard what you said. He knew exactly the words that were spoken and their meaning. But he was having a hard time thinking of anything as he suddenly became aware again of the fact that you were still naked, the lab coat you had on falling open to reveal your breasts.

“How about we talk about that while you get dressed in something more appropriate?” Clearing his throat roughly, Nanami pushed away from the table. His cheeks were getting a bit warm and he didn’t want you to see.

“No, tell me where Sukuna is!” Slapping your hands loudly on the table, you glared sharply at Nanami when he tried to come closer. “I don’t want to be alone any longer! My companions didn’t make it, he’s all I have!”

“(Y/N)...” Sighing softly, Nanami didn’t know what to do. If he tried to raise his hand, you growled at him, flexing your fingers as if you were going to strike him. He couldn’t tell you where Sukuna was, no matter what. “You’re- you’re not alone.”

“What do you mean?” Your face softened just a fraction, and you leaned back as Nanami lifted his hand slowly, placing it on the table near your own hand.

“You have me.” Nanami felt something odd twisting his stomach, something that told him this simultaneously was a good and bad idea. It wasn’t wise to say this to you, to try and build some kind of relationship beyond a scientist and his test subject, but what did he have to lose? You were the first alien he’d ever come in contact with, there were bound to be some risks he’d have to take to keep you happy.

“Really?” Relaxing your body, you let your hand get closer to Nanami’s.

“Really.” Fully grabbing your hand now, Nanami tugged you from the stool, craning his head away to avoid looking at your open chest. “Now follow me, I think there’s some scrubs in one of these drawers.”

“Nanami, I’m hungry.” After finding you a set of clothes buried in a drawer and cutting a hole in the bottoms for your tail, Nanami was greeted with the sound of your growling stomach.

“What do you eat?”

“Whatever you eat.” Taking up residence on the singular fold out couch Nanami used to sleep on, you watched him pick up the phone on his desk.

“Let’s have some pasta then.”

While Nanami preferred to cook his food himself rather than ordering it from upstairs, he didn’t have the heart to tell you that the cafeteria food was less than ideal. You seemed to love the dish he gave you, eating it with no hesitation and a smile on your face.

“Is there anything else you can tell me about your kind?” Picking over his food, Nanami watched you finish eating in record time and pushed his plate over to you.

“Like what?” Tilting your head to the side, you gladly took his food.

“Anything that comes to mind like cultural things, maybe you celebrate holidays?”

“We do! I was created to leave the planet, but others get to stay and cultivate life there. We have something close to what you call Christmas and others for things you wouldn’t understand.”

“Really? You’ll have to write them down for me later.” Nodding to himself, he made the mental note to teach you how to write. Glancing down at the two now empty plates before you, Nanami flicked his head toward the phone. “Fancy some more?”

As it reached midnight, Nanami became starkly aware of the fact there was only one place for the both of you to sleep. He wasn’t sure how much sleep you actually needed or if you needed any at all for that matter, but he knew for sure that sleeping on the same fold out mattress with you would be crossing a line he wasn’t ready for. It was already too short to hold his entire frame, and putting two bodies side by side wouldn’t be a good idea.

“(Y/N), are you tired?” Standing up from the couch, he motioned for you to stand as well.

“Yes.” Your voice was chipper as ever, not a hint of exhaustion heard. You watched with rapt interest as Nanami unfolded the mattress and set it on the ground.

“Alright, well you’ll be sleeping here and I’ll be sleeping in the barracks.”

“I’m going to be alone?”

“Is that a problem?” Quirking a brow, Nanami glanced at you.

“Well not necessarily but I- I don’t want to be alone. Not on my first night, at least.” Curling your tail on the ground, you worried your fingers, claws clicking together as you did. Nanami could feel his resolve wearing down, the nervous look you tried to hide made his fingers flex; he felt an overarching urge to protect you.

“I’ll grab another couch from the lab next door.” Turning on his heel, Nanami took deep breaths as he left the room. Forcing his head to get clear, he drug another couch into his lab, setting it up across from the first one.

“Is this what you call a sleepover?” You asked, watching Nanami set up both couches with blankets and pillows.

“You could say that, yes.” A strange giggle left your mouth and it made Nanami pause and look at you. “What was that sound?”

“A laugh?” Dropping your face in confusion, you looked him straight in the eye. “Is something wrong?”

“No no it’s just-” clearing his throat loudly, Nanami rushed out the next words, “That was the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.” At his admittance, you giggled again and he had to bite his lip hard from audibly swooning.

“Mother made it special for me, she makes all her children special.” Mimicking the way Nanami climbed into bed, you laid down and stared at the dark ceiling. “Only some of us can laugh like that, and others have pheromones and what not to attract the native people on a new planet.”

“(Y/N), do you have special pheromones too?” Your casual mention of impregnating and taking over the whole planet flashed in his head.

“I think I do, why else would you have agreed to stay here with me?”

“Good to know.” Nanami would have to install a high tech air filter later, he didn’t like the idea of slowly succumbing to your desires. Fully laying down in bed, he drew the blankets up to his chin and tried not to think of it anymore. “Good night.”

For a month Nanami studied you nonstop. Gathering medical information, he discovered you had three stomachs and two hearts. Through plenty of trial and error you learned how to keep the swinging of your tail under control and not trip him anymore. He even learned your favorite foods and the relative location of your home planet in the galaxy.

When Nanami had to step out for meetings, he begrudgingly let fellow scientist Gojo watch over you. The best in his field and horribly obnoxious about it, Nanami tried to limit the time you two spent together. He didn’t need Gojo influencing you too much and ruining the work Nanami had put into acclimating you to society in an appropriate way.

“You’re back!” It was like he was coming home from work whenever you greeted him like that. You bounded over to the door from wherever you were and bounced on your toes, eager to talk to him about what he’d done while away.

“Mhmm. How’s it been with Gojo?” Nanami glanced up at said man, not liking the fact that he was lounging on the couch with his laptop perched precariously on his thigh.

“It’s great! He showed me something really interesting.” A shy giggle left your lips and you avoided further eye contact with Nanami.

“What is it?” Narrowing his eyes, Nanami began to glower at Gojo, who started to shrink under his gaze.

“(Y/N), don’t you have something to say first?” Gojo smirked, barely hiding a chuckle behind his hand.

“Oh, you’re right!” Squaring your shoulders at Nanami, you took a deep breath. “Welcome back, daddy!” Taking a brief glance at Gojo, you cupped your cheeks and stuck your tongue out, crossing your eyes for extra measure.

“W-what the fuck!” Scrambling back in shock, Nanami glared sharply at Gojo as a harsh red flush coated his cheeks. He was ashamed to admit he’d seen that face before, late at night when he was too restless to sleep and needed something to help soothe his mind.

“What’s wrong, Kento? Do you not like what (Y/N)’s doin’?” The dark chuckle behind Gojo’s words had Nanami wanting to throttle him. Of course he liked it, he was a grown man wasn’t he? Not to mention Nanami couldn’t remember the last time he’d laid down with another warm body like that and the face you were making was bringing several repressed thoughts to the surface.

Unable to form the proper words, Nanami side stepped you and went to his desk, placing files down that needed to be typed out later and trying to still his rapid heartbeat. The way you said that sentence so enthusiastically, saliva making your tongue glisten in the light - it was too much for him to deal with so abruptly.

“Why’d you teach her that shit?” Nanami growled, covering the lower half of his face with his trembling hand.

“(Y/N) deserves to know all aspects of human life, wouldn’t you agree?” Closing his laptop, Gojo stood up and walked to the door. “Besides Kento, I know you get lonely at night.” Smiling sweetly at you, Gojo left the room without any further comment.

“(Y/N).” With his back still facing you, Nanami heaved a sigh.

“Yes?” You said slowly, relaxing your body. The tension rolled off Nanami in waves, making the air thick and uncomfortable. It was hard to read whether he was angry or not.

“What has Gojo been teaching you?” The subtle sag in his shoulders isn’t missed by you, making you scramble to the desk and face him.

“I don’t know! He said there were some interesting things you’d yet to show me and he pulled up some websites and- and-” A bit of fear spiked in your head. You’d only gone along with what Gojo said was right, Nanami had entrusted you to his care after all and your whole reason for being on the planet was to assimilate. “Are you mad at me?” Rubbing at your four eyes to stem a sudden wave of anxious tears, you looked at Nanami, waiting nervously for his answer.

“Not at you. Him.” Sensing your oncoming distraught, Nanami shook his head and cleared his throat. “I want you to learn all the good things of human life and well-”

“Sex isn’t a good thing?” You gasped, leaning your hands on the desk.

“Did he teach you about sex?” Nanami nearly yelled back.

“He did! We read a lot of medical journals about it, it releases so many good chemicals into the human brain! And then Gojo went to this website called PornHub and-”

“He what?!” A heart attack. Nanami was going to have a heart attack.

“Let me finish! He showed me humans having sex and it looked like they were having a great time!” Your breath was coming out short and Nanami could hear the drag of your tail on the ground as you got worked up. “But it didn’t do anything to me, I haven’t reached that point yet!” He didn’t understand what you meant and while the urge to drown himself in the bottle of dark liquor he kept hidden away tugged at him, his pursuit for knowledge was greater.

“What do you mean you ‘haven’t reached that point yet’?” Collapsing into the desk chair, Nanami was more worked up than he thought. The shock of hearing you call him daddy, learning that you discovered what sex was and now he was going to know when you would begin to show interest in such a thing.

“Sexual maturity, I’m not there yet, so seeing that stuff didn’t do anything to me.”

“When will you be?” He pressed, grabbing a pen and getting ready to write down whatever you said on the corner of a file.

“It’s been a month since I’ve transformed, so in about a week or two.”

“That fast?” Nanami blanched, mind spinning at how he was going to deal with that. “Humans take years, though, shouldn’t my blood affect that?”

“No, my DNA only takes what it needs from yours. My base mechanics like lifespan and in this case sexual maturity are all hardwired by Mother. They won’t change just because a few drops of your blood mix in.”

“So...so what does that mean for you? Do you need some kind of special uh- a special thing or-?” His cheeks and ears burned fiercely and Nanami cleared his throat in the middle of the sentence. He knew exactly what he meant by ‘a special thing’ but he couldn’t bring himself to say it in front of you.

“I don’t know, actually.” Shrugging your shoulders, you sat on the edge of his desk. “Sukuna is supposed to tell me what happens and what to do after we pick out a suitable mate for me.”

There was that mention of Sukuna again. The creature buried so far underground some people wondered if he was passing the Earth's mantle. He’d settled down in the month since your arrival, seemingly knowing that you had emerged from the embryo and survived. He still refused to give any answers and you hadn’t mentioned him in nearly three weeks.

“You don’t need him. We can figure it out once it gets here.” Shaking his head, Nanami could feel himself getting a little high off your pheromones with you sitting so close. The air filter he put into the room could only do so much when your scent rolled off in such thick waves.

“Okay.” Sighing the word, you resigned yourself to playing with your fingers. Silence washed over the room, less tense than before but still tainted with an edge to it. Both of you were flushed from talking about this subject and Nanami was glad you had your back to him.

“(Y/N), I have another question.” A few minutes later, Nanami couldn’t hold back the question burning in his mind. You let out a hum of acknowledgement but didn’t face him. “What would be a suitable mate for you? What kind of human?”

He blamed it on your pheromones, he blamed every last less than professional thought in his head on your pheromones and what you did to him and he especially blamed Gojo for forcing this topic of conversation to come up. Nanami tried to reason with himself, put the narrative in his head that he wanted to know for science, but in the dark recesses of his mind Nanami wanted to know who your type was if you even had one.

“Well actually, a human like you is perfect.” Your back curved just a little to keep your face hidden as you spoke. The words hung in the air, leaving Nanami’s mouth hanging slightly open and his mind bouncing to a hundred different places at once.

“Like me?” He whispered, barely registering the words coming out of his mouth.

“Exactly like you.” This time you looked over your shoulder at him, your eyes narrowing as you took in his reaction. His shock seemed to be enough for you, your secondary eyes pinching closed as you smiled, and you turned back to face forward. “Nanami, I’m hungry.”

Having grown accustomed to your new home, you slid off the desk and to the couch that was yours. Nanami’s eyes were glued to your back, watching the way your tail moved on the ground as you walked. His throat was suddenly thick, there were plenty of things he wanted to say, things that would definitely violate his code of ethics.

“Nanami.” Your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, back to reality where you were far away from arms reach. The weight of your eyes bore right back into him and Nanami knew he’d been caught staring.

“Yes?” He forced the word out, his tongue feeling heavy and foreign in his mouth.

“Should we have pasta tonight?”

Nanami hardly slept at all that night, plagued with ideas of what you thought about him and less than savory images of you and your body. Shame settled over him like a second blanket as he tossed and turned throughout the night, trying to rid his mind of such things to no avail.

In the morning, Nanami got rid of the second couch and made the decision to sleep in the barracks when he needed to. While nothing inherently sexual had occurred, he still felt like he betrayed some sort of trust between you two, sullied the pure relationship you had together.

Ignoring your whines and protests, he also made the decision to get rid of Gojo as your babysitter. He didn’t want or need your mind filled with things he didn’t deem appropriate and Gojo was the main perpetrator of such things, and he was confident enough that he could leave you alone for a few hours and nothing bad would happen.

It almost hurts to leave you alone at night, the old ritual of slowly nudging you along your night time routine and laying down on adjacent mattresses was now replaced by getting you ready for bed but then leaving shortly after you were all tucked in. Sometimes you whined and wanted him to stay, claiming that you didn’t sleep as well without him there, and sometimes Nanami hesitated at the door before steeling his resolve and leaving.

He doubts he’ll ever tell you that he stopped sleeping as well too.

An abrupt evening meeting three weeks later called him away from you sooner than either of you would have liked. You’d developed a cough and a bit of a rash over the course of time and while Nanami was sure this meant you were reaching sexual maturity, he was still hell bent on finding some medicine to help you, not wanting to go to this meeting about another potential UFO sighting.

“(Y/N), I’m back and I-” Nanami all but ran back to his laboratory with some medicine he’d swiped from Gojo. He was worried for you, not just as a scientist but as a friend. Throwing open the door and locking it quickly to contain any possible airborne particles, Nanami was assaulted with the harsh smell of something sweetly floral.

“N-nanami!” His eyes immediately find you, writhing in what looks like agony on the mattress he’d pulled out for you before leaving. Walking quickly over to you, every inhale he made felt like he was breathing in a thick fog.

“Wh-what’s wrong?” Coughing and putting a hand over his face, he looked over you. It was normal for you to just wear a long, oversized t-shirt Gojo got you from a local thrift store to sleep and right now it was clinging tightly to your body from the sweat pouring out of you.

“Nanami!” Shaking your head side to side, he could see the tears leaking out of your eyes. Against his better judgement, Nanami crouched down on one knee and put a hand on your forehead.

“Shit, you’re burning up.” Pulling his fingers away, there was a light yellow powdery film left on them. “(Y/N) what is this? Has it started?” The substance tingled on his fingers, making them go slightly numb.

There was a pitiful noise from you as a response and a limp nod, and Nanami rushed to the sink to wash off his hands. The scent in the room was overwhelming, almost choking him with every inhale he made. Turning the ventilation system on as high as it could go did nothing and there was still pollen visibly floating in the air.

“I have to go, I can’t be here.”

“No!” You cried, falling out of bed with a loud thump and crawling toward Nanami. “D-don’t leave!”

“I have to, this stuff isn’t good for me.” Nanami kept his back to you, hastily trying to grab some things from his desk. His cock was already beginning to stiffen painfully and the sounds you were making were echoing inside his head.

“Wait!” Tugging on his pant leg, you dug your claws into it.

“(Y/N), let go.” He tried to shake you off, staunchly avoiding eye contact. The heat on his skin was rising and if Nanami were to look in a mirror he would see how red he was. You refused to let go, sitting up on weak knees and pushing your hand further up his leg.

“D-daddy, please! Help me!”

That was it. That was the moment that broke Nanami Kento. He knows Gojo has told you that he likes to be called that in bed, among other things. He knows that the pollen in the air is what’s making his head impossibly foggy with only one thing able to be focused on. Nanami knows that if he stays here any longer, he’ll do something that he won’t regret, but that might cost him his job.

“Daddy…” Emboldened by unbridled desperation, you force Nanami to face you with strength he didn’t know you possessed. Eye to eye with his cock straining against his slacks, you shove your face right into it.

“(Y/N)!” Your name comes out as a rough groan from his lips and Nanami’s hands fly to grab the back of your head. As he grips your head, Nanami makes no move to pull you away and doesn’t stop you from rubbing your face along his clothed cock.

“Please please please, just this once! I need to do this-” The pleading you're doing is muffled by your mouth running along fabric, words slurred and barely coming out properly. Just from this stimulation alone Nanami can feel his balls tighten like he’s about to cum.

“Sto-stop, stop this.” Nanami’s own sense of morals, his will to do anything besides being in this room with you was going to be torn to shreds the longer you touched him. And it was, as he came in his pants, rutting his hips like a pathetic teenager into your face.

He came but his cock was still as hard as before, maybe even more so. There was no reprieve from the painful need to be stimulated, to feel you touch him again and again and again. With a mangled groan, he shoves your head away and grabs his waistband.

Swatting your hands away that still rest on his hips, Nanami undoes his belt and shoves his pants and underwear down to the ground. His cock slaps against his dress shirt, glistening from the previous load of cum and leaking more like he’s never seen before.

“What did you do to me?” He asks under his breath, feeling sweat pooling on his skin despite being half naked. As he takes off his remaining clothes, Nanami can feel the tingle from the pollen settling all over him, sticking to his hair and to every crevice of his body.

“D’ya like it, daddy? That’s what M-mother chose for me, it’s a new- a new evolution we got from a previous planet.” It’s amazing that you can stand on your own feet despite the way your legs shake violently. Nanami can tell you’re in a sorry state, so he lets you lead him to the mattress and fall back onto it.

“Mother made you pollen? How interesting.” Somewhere far back in his head, he really did find it genuinely interesting. But right now he was merely making conversation, settling on the bed as you climbed on top of him and took your wet shirt off.

The rash that had been on your skin was now turning into powdery pollen before his very eyes, falling off and into the air like a flower's pollen would. Laying down on Nanami, pressing your breasts against his chest, you fell into a kiss with him.

Even though it was your first kiss, Nanami was the one left feeling inexperienced as you slotted your mouths together and slid your tongue past his lips. Even your saliva was sweet as it dripped it into his mouth and down the sides. Nanami’s hands roamed your body, pinching into your sides and squeezing your ass painfully tight. Surprisingly, your tail didn’t get in the way, just languidly swaying side to side and sometimes tickling his shins.

“Daddy, please- I want more!” You whined loudly, breaking the kiss to trail your lips along his neck and chest and nip at the skin every so often.

“Tell me. Tell- tell daddy what you want.” There was the slightest hesitation, a tiny tinge of shame for doing this with you that got washed away as quickly as it came up by your wet cunt sliding against his cock.

“I want you inside me.” Wrapping your fingers around his cock, you stroked it slowly, unable to focus on putting it in and kissing him at the same time. Giving up with a grunt, you settled for rubbing your cunt along his shaft.

“Shit, roll over.” Flipping you with ease, Nanami grabs onto your thighs and holds them apart. Staring down at your cunt, it looks just like any other human sex organ, giving Nanami some peace of mind that he wouldn’t need to do anything too complicated to make you feel good.

You whine again when he doesn’t immediately push himself balls deep into you, instead laying on his stomach and giving your inner thighs kisses. Nanami grabs your hands, silently telling you to hold your legs apart as he delves in deeper.

One lick up your slit and you fall apart so easily, gushing around his mouth so much Nanami is sure you just had an orgasm. Greedily drinking it up, Nanami can attest that this is the best thing he’s ever tasted. Burying his face into your heat, he can’t keep his tongue in one place for too long, torn between pushing it deep inside you and licking at your swollen clit.

You’ve given up holding your legs open a while ago. As Nanami sucked on your clit, your thighs clamped down around his head and your fingers threaded through his hair. The feeling of his mouth on you was the best you’d ever experienced in your short time being alive and it was one you’d think about forever.

“Oh my- daddy, I-” Your eyes were closed so tightly you were seeing stars and you were sure Nanami couldn’t breathe anymore from how tightly you squeezed him as you came. His head thrashed side to side, tongue swiping all along your sex and inner thighs to catch all of your release.

“This is the best scientific breakthrough we’ve ever had.” Wrenching his head away before he passed out, Nanami laid limply on the bed. As the words left his mouth he remembered all those weeks ago now when you first came to him as just a tiny, glowing embryo. He never would have been able to imagine that you’d be here, turning him to lay on his back and crawling between his legs.

Grabbing the base of his cock firmly, you gave one lick to the tip before engulfing it fully in your mouth. Nanami’s back arched high off the bed in shock, surprised at the lack of hesitation from you and how easily he hit the back of your throat.

“S-slow down a little.” He panted, trying to cup your face and get you to look at him. Swatting his hand away, you let your tongue loll in your mouth as you sucked him off, easily planting your nose on his lower stomach and swallowing around him.

It must have been the pollen in the air to make him cum so quickly, Nanami reasoned with a harsh blush on his face. That was the only explanation for why he was currently spilling a thick load of cum down your throat in less than two minutes of you sucking him off.

“You taste so good, daddy.” Pulling off his cock, you licked the sides and down to his balls, gently sucking one into your mouth and looking up at him. Despite just cumming, Nanami felt another orgasm wash over him and another wave of cum came out, dribbling down the sides of his cock and onto your face.

Slapping a hand over his face, Nanami let out a few moans he’d been holding back. There was no way he would ever be able to look at you the same way after seeing your face covered in his seed.

“C’mere.” Stopping you from your current ministrations, he pulled you to lay over top of him again. Grabbing your sweaty shirt from the ground, he wiped the cum off your face, kissing your skin after he wiped it clean.

“Daddy, will you put it in already?” You cried, smacking your ass against his thighs angrily.

“Be patient, baby.” Petting down your back, Nanami shushed you, giving your ass a quick pinch before gripping the base of his cock. Keeping a hand on your hip to keep you steady, he helped you sink down on his cock, easily all the way to the hilt.

Digging your claws into his chest, you let out a loud howl. Finally you were getting what you really needed, the feeling of Nanami’s cock hugged tightly by your cunt spreading a warm feeling throughout your body.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He hissed as you dragged your hips upward and back down again. Sure he’d been with other women before but none like this. Your cunt squeezed him incredibly tight, making it impossible for him to do anything other than lay back and let you move however you saw fit.

You weren’t shy in your motions either, riding his cock with a dizzying confidence and nearly fumbling down into a heap of loud moans on more than one occasion. Even with all the prep before your arrival to the planet and research you’d done about sex and the human experience, nothing could have prepared you for how good it actually felt during your heat.

Nanami was sure everyone within the compound could hear what was going on in the room, your noises were as loud as they’d ever been. The sound was as beautiful as when you laughed, hypnotizing him further into compliance.

“Shit!” He cursed harshly, nails digging into the flesh of your hips as he came. As his orgasm came over him, Nanami got no break from the pleasurable waves washing over him because you refused to stop.

“More, more!” You panted, working even harder to get him to cum again. With the added vigor, more pollen released into the air and Nanami breathed in a deep mouthful. Snaking an arm around your back, Nanami rolled you over, acting on pure instinct as he pushed and pulled your body into a mating press.

“You’re so- so demanding, baby.” The pet name came without thinking, not that Nanami was doing a whole lot as he pounded the full length of his cock into you. He wasn’t sure you could hear him, even while being face to face like this. There were too many sounds in the room, the moans that left both of you freely, the wet slapping of skin against skin and the creak of the old mattress springs.

“Please, give it all to me!” Throwing your head back, your cunt spasmed around Nanami’s cock for the umpteenth time, making another gush of your release coat everything within its reach.

Nanami was sure you’d have bruises later from how hard he gripped you but right now he couldn’t find it in him to care. The only thing on his mind was fucking you so hard you stopped babbling and crying like a baby for more of him. He wanted to give you all that he had and more until he himself collapsed as well.

Pushing a hand between your bodies, when he touched your clit Nanami briefly went deaf, unprepared for the incredibly high pitched moan that left your lips. His ears were ringing fiercely but he kept going, refusing to take his eyes off the way your mouth fell open as he rubbed your clit in quick circles.

“H-how many- how many times have you cum?” He gasped, feeling the very beginnings of a burn in his thighs.

“Not enough, it’s not enough.” Thrashing your head against the mattress, you wound your arms around his shoulders. “I need more, daddy.”

“I don’t have any more.” Nanami spoke around the smothering kisses you gave him.

“You do! Just- just a few more!” He wasn’t really in a position to argue with you, you were holding onto him with far more strength than he could ever hope to possess, and while the pollen on your skin had started to diminish there was still a lot in the air that refused to let him truly come to a stop.

As if on command, Nanami felt his balls tighten up and he came again. The arms holding him up broke down and he fell on top of you, burrowing his face into your neck and holding your hips up with his hands.

“Fuck, baby-” With his eyes squeezed shut, Nanami lost track of where he actually was. Nothing mattered except for the feeling of your body underneath him and your cunt holding him in a vice grip. There wasn’t any reason to keep track of how many times he’d emptied a load inside you, so when he did it again so soon after the other one, Nanami paid it no mind.

“It’s coming!” You gasped suddenly, cradling the back of Nanami’s head as your body suddenly came to a stop. Unable to stammer out a question as to what was coming, Nanami was met with the harsh shock of your cunt getting so tight he couldn’t move any further.

Raking your fingers through his hair, you sobbed openly, words slurring together. Nanami was only able to catch something about a ‘seal’ and how you were making Mother so proud for your first heat cycle on Earth.

“Baby, what’s going on?” Craning his head down, Nanami was just barely able to see the swollen flesh of your sex encompassing his cock.

“Y-you humans would call this a knot, right?” Shifting your hips a little, you slowly unwind your legs from around Nanami and let them lay on the bed. “I have to keep you inside for a while.”

“You’re going to get pregnant though.” With his mind still in disarray, Nanami found that he didn’t actually care. He knew that was why you came to the planet and he was willing to help you fulfill your mission.

“Not this first time, I’m only keeping it for later.”

“Of course an alien has sperm storage.” Mumbling to himself, Nanami felt the aches in his body finally starting to settle in as the rest of the pollen was cleared out of the air and the world around him returned to normal. Laying down as gently as possible, Nanami rolled you onto your side and hooked your leg over him. “How long will we be like this?”

“At least another five minutes.” Snuggling closer to him, you tucked your head under his chin. Taking a deep breath, Nanami felt around for the blanket you used that had managed to stay on the bed during all the moving. Throwing it over the two of you, he let out a sigh.

“I can wait five minutes.” No doubt there was going to be a lot of explaining to do on his part, and he could possibly get fired, but Nanami refused to think about that right now. He was far too tired, and the way you cuddled into him had not an ounce of regret or shame going through him. He would do it all again in a heartbeat.

“Nanami?” You whispered, fighting through sleep.

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

Did you know what love truly was? Did you have the capacity to love him like any other human, or were you thinking of a different emotion that you wanted to convey? Maybe you loved him in a way that he couldn’t understand and never would, or perhaps you were lying to further your agenda.

“I love you too.” Kissing the top of your head, Nanami pushed all other thoughts out of his head that could lead him to a negative outcome. Focusing on the sound of your breathing, he knew you had fallen asleep, and he kissed you again. “Yeah...I love you too.”

[in-tua-deep]

Are you into my hero academia? What about an AU or crossover with tua?

UHHHH I am technically, like, peripherally? I watched some seasons of the show like two or three years ago and since then have simply absorbed all content through osmosis, reading fanfiction that has canon events, and my sister telling me about the arcs of her fav characters lmao

so a crossover hmmm

First of all you'd have to like, establish whether bnha is an alternate universe or just The Future If No Apocalypse with quirks being traced back to the descendants of the kids born without mothers

So let's say it's that - the glowing baby was the "first quirk" but the truth is people had powers before that. But - well, the Umbrella Academy was obviously a marketing gimmick to those in the future! There were even comics based on them

In the future, you might find some of those comics in museum exhibits dedicated to depictions of powers in the pre-quirk era, but they're just fun depictions and much less popular than, oh, DC or MCU comics which are also in the exhibits!

End of s2 doesn't happen I guess in this au?? No sparrow academy at least lmao. So, the Umbrella Academy stop the apocalypse (again) and the Commission threat is? Neutralized? Whatever. They decide to jump back to the future

Five warns them that time travel is a crapshoot, that he has no fucking idea when they'll land beyond some nebulous "future" because Five can at least control the direction if not exactly how long

Also, Five is like. Super tired. Incredibly tired. Homeboy still has a healing gut wound, time traveled twice, has been jumping all over the place, gotten even more injured, experienced paradox psychosis, and managed to undo time all in the space of like, two weeks. There actually more than that but we don't have time to get into how fucking tired Five is from his ~Month of Hell

Like genuinely this is like putting someone almost delirious from lack of sleep in the driver's seat of a car and expecting to get to your destination in one piece

But hey, the siblings are like "do it uwu" and Five has sacrificed everything for them already so why not get behind the wheel again

So Five jumps them, and of course something goes wrong because Five has pushed his powers like a great big rubber band and honestly it was only a matter of time before he lost his grip and it snapped back to hit him

So here be the umbrella academy: spilled out into the future like a cup of bad coffee.

Five probably isn't in too good of shape tbh, like they're hundreds of years in the future (but hey at least confirmation of no apocalypse am I right) in a world full of superpowers and Five is like. bleeding from his ears and nose probably idk

Let's handwave a little bit - Reginald made them all polyglots so the squad all speak varying levels of Japanese. Allison is the best at it, Five is second best but tends to use more archaic words bc he had missions in Japan back when he was with the commission, and Klaus is third best.

(Ben is the worst bc he decided when he was 16-and-dead that he didn't have to do anything regarding lessons and maintenance and hasn't given a shit since - but also he's dead so)

So you have a bunch of weird adults with a bleeding child in like, an alley who have appeared from nowhere

so of course heroes get involved

Anyway, the squad get taken in and Five is conscious but like, barely? And he's not going to let himself get separated from his siblings again fuck-you-officer and there is a lot of confusion

anyway detective tsukauchi ends up getting involved and ends up having to hear this batshit story and be like "...truth." which sends all kinds of people scrambling because fucking time travel? Like yeah, it's been theorized to be a possible quirk but there's no recorded cases of any sort of time travel that is for more than 24 hours let alone hundreds of years

"I'm an adult." Five says sourly, "I just happened to be returned to my 13 year old body when I time traveled one time."

"True." Tsukauchi says, feeling his soul leave his body, but like. absently. the way he does when he's called in at 2am after getting off of work at midnight.

"I'm 58." Five says.

"Lie." Tsukauchi says, because this is a headcanon hill I will die on.

"I'm probably 58, but it was hard to keep track. I'm at least 50." Five corrects.

"True." Tsukauchi sighs like these six (seven? they keep referring to another sibling and Klaus said 'ghost' like that was fine and it registered as true and Tsukauchi is not nearly paid enough for this) are not giving him a migraine by just existing

on the bright side there's like, probably protocols in place for individuals who are Legally Chronologically Adults but thanks to quirks are Not Physically Or Not Mentally Adults with tests to determine if the individual needs a guardian or not

though i'm gonna be honest idk if Five would pass the test bc he literally cannot take care of himself at all, has never paid taxes or understands how to exist legally, and also his emotional maturity is stunted as all hell. also like. we don't actually know how much being in his thirteen-year-old body affects his mental state but yeAH Five is vibing

anyway Tsukauchi probably phones a friend on this bullshit because Time Travel Child alone is probably enough for the Hero Commission to be like "find a way to control and use it or nuke it from orbit" and that's not even touching whatever the fuck Klaus is doing (shit gets real once 'dead men tell no tales' stops being true) let ALONE Allison's whole deal

on the bright side like, at least Vanya isn't getting side-eyed that much bc Big Destructive Quirks aren't exactly unknown? if vanya wanted to i guess quirk suppressors exist for that until extensive training on how to control a super powerful quirk happens

Tsukauchi in the group chat: Aizawa please I am literally begging you to take this bullshit on

Aizawa: in this economy? with my class?

RatGod: lol we'll take them ;3c

Aizawa: no

Anyway they probably end up having to live at UA while Five insists on trying to get them home still and everyone else is like "oh hey we used to be child soldiers as well! (:" and Aizawa is like "i hate everything about this and everything about all of you but also like nedzu is making me interact with you so :/"

nedzu is out here vibing like "lol i just don't want the hero commission to get their little paws on these time traveling fuckers, i think you should make then teaching assistants or something"

honestly the siblings are probably like. figuring out how to function in the bnha universe and getting like, legally registered and stuff while Five ferally refuses bc that's like saying he's giving up on getting them home and he can do this

Recovery girl tries to heal him a little when he arrives and he passes out for two weeks like, immediately bc homeboy is running on fumes and spite at this point

also i think on principle it would be REALLY FUNNY if the squad got to tag along with the class bc like. Five is thirteen and the class are all 15. this does not sound like a large age gap. anyone who has interacted with teenagers know that the class would squint at Five and be like "who is this sassy lost middle schooler."

I feel like when I was a sophomore we were still like "freshman... babie" even though we were literally only one year older.

i think the difference between the umbrella academy and school kids would be pretty funny like. objectively the bnha kids are lowkey child soldiers?? like they're 15 and fighting villains but like, there's all this red tape and laws and stuff but,,, deku still be breaking his limbs in a child fighting ring against equally superpowered children for like. entertainment and sponsorships sooo

but also like Five would be like "oh cool when is the experimentation class"

"the what"

"you know, when your powers are pushed real hard by putting you in different terrible situations while your dad and sibling stand by with clipboards writing down the exact voltage it takes before you can't use your powers anymore when being electrocuted"

"hound dog's office is right there. therapy is available to you at any time. i need you to know this."

all might calls Luther "my boy" like one (1) time and Luther just breaks down crying probably because he is starved for positive attention

klaus and midnight get along like a literal house on fire, aizawa tried his best to keep them apart for as long as possible but god damn

(klaus: your name is shimura nana??

all might: immediately dies choking on blood)

i feel it absolutely necessary to point out that aizawa, present mic, and midnight are all like, 30? and the umbrella academy are all between 29-early 30s? they are PEERS but like. the umbrella academy are more chaotic due to childhood trauma

the umbrella academy probably get offered to like. also train to be heroes. i mean,, there HAS to be some sort of track for people who change careers right?? you don't have to cement your future as a hero when you're 15 i'm sure there must be something and the squad already have experience if they want to go be legal heroes

diego probably does at least?? diego just vibes honestly. diego gets momo to make knives during a team exercise and they just go feral on everyone else and it ends with diego highfiving momo and someone getting way to close to being stabbed for comfort

Five might just be. legally enrolled as an Actual Student? But also i think it's funny to picture the entire squad just. all in the back of the classroom with luther trying to fit into a high school desk as they take notes on the laws of The Future surrounding heroics

every word out of the umbrella academy's mouths just make everyone more concerned on principal but like, five and klaus are probably the worst offenders. Klaus just says whatever comes to mind with no filter and Five doesn't get what people would consider to be abnormal anymore like

Five: yeah our dad bought us when we were babies and experimented on us throughout our childhood in order to make an elite team of child soldiers superheroes, it happens

Todoroki: ...have you heard of quirk marriages?

izuku probably has an aneurism bc he's is the only person who might recognize them from the comics because you know ya boy extensively researched the idea of heroics in pre-quirk eras (batman was an inspiration alright???) and might dredge up a memory of a less popular comic series

Five: I can time travel but it is very hard, which is why we are hundreds of years in the future. And why I look like a child.

Kaminari: so are you a kid or not?

Five, serenely: whatever is most convenient for me at any given moment

Mina: hell yeah game the system

they have a brief lesson on astronomy and Luther raises his hand like "ooh! i was isolated on the moon for four years and did SO MUCH research" and then just gets up and starts infodumping like way too much information on the moon

Izuku sitting there like "damn if quirks hadn't popped up we could have achieved so much in terms of space travel. please tell me more giant man who lived in pre-quirk era."

Vanya finds out about the quirkless and is like "oh mood that genuinely sounds like my childhood, being ordinary in a house full of extraordinary people, and then i found out that i did have powers but only much later in life after i had already been emotionally scarred by the experience"

deku: vanya we have so much in common

iida and uraraka: concerned noises

aizawa: hound dog. therapy with hound dog for all of you.

there's probably some conflict with like, the hero commission wanting to get their hands on the time travelers?? but probably especially five and klaus as a) time travel and b) ghosts (the hc def has bodies they would like to stay buried)

five has a pavlovian reaction to anything with 'commission' in the name and hates them on site, probably plays into his age in order to become a ward of UA or something to protect him from the commission a little bit.

(this makes nedzu Five's legal guardian. aizawa has his resignation papers all prepped in a drawer marked 'in case of emergency' but let's be real, if nedzu wants to take over the world aizawa should probably be on the rat-bear's side of things :/)

five: ah, i do recall the inhumane experimentation that we were subjected to

nedzu, who was experimented on: haha same hat! want me to dig up the location of reginald hargreeves's remains so you can spit on them?

klaus: nah no worries we dumped them out in the courtyard unceremoniously like, a while back. how long ago varies for each of us because of time travel!

luther: you said hound dog's office was down the hall and to the right?

on the bright side, Luther probably feels like. way less self conscious about his body, partially bc of his fighting and all that in the 60s but also bc !! now he genuinely doesn't feel like a freak. no one even gives him a second glance. one of the teachers looks like a slab of cement with a face. gang orca looks Like That. there is literally a student with an entire bird head and goth aesthetic. Luther does not stick out at all

allison and shinso bond over having "villainous" voice-based quirks

allison and shinso having worn muzzles at some point in their youth as punishment 🤝

aizawa probably helps train vanya as well with the whole, being able to erase a world ending quirk safely thing he's got going on which makes for a very nice safety net

i don't think vanya would want to be a hero at the end of things though. maybe the assistant teacher in the music class or something?? all vanya wants is to be able to not end the world

i feel like as time goes by, five brings up trying to get home less and less. part of that is because like,,, genuinely what do they have to go back to?? Allison has Claire, but like. I'm 100% sure the first thing she did in the future was try track down Claire's records and found out Claire was like. fine. became an adult, had a family, probably became the ancestor of the first "quirked" kids who officially popped up after light baby. had a good life, died at an old age etc. etc.

they start settling into the bnha world with like, "we can always hop aboard the five express into where the fuck ever" as a plan Z if things go completely pear shaped (again)

i'mma be real, five himself doesn't give a fuck as long as there is a) no apocalypse and b) his family is alive. Like that's it. His bar is so incredibly low and yet his life keeps fucking trying to limbo under it

i just think it would be funny to have like, Five trying to get along with his "peers" and make friends while the siblings do the same but like, in the staff room

also think it would be funny for five to just walk into the staff room and get coffee occasionally.

a teacher: why is a student in here -

Five, sipping coffee: i'm an adult

nedzu like "what kind of guardian would i be if i didn't teach my new son all the tunnels around ua so he can pop out wherever"

five like "hey new dad can i put stashes of supplies all around ua of weapons, money, food, and other assorted things that might be useful if one needed to fight or make a run for it" and nedzu is like "haha just put your list of what supplies you want in your go bags on my desk and i'll critique it later!"

anyway a bnha/tua crossover would be incredibly chaotic but probably very funny

[mrspillow]

Sorry (Jellal Fernandes x Reader)

"Hmm... strawberry cake..."

Suppressing a small laugh you turned your head to Erza, your best friend of childhood days that never seemed to miss the opportunity of shoving cake into her mouth.

You had seen the amounts of baked goods the redhead could swallow within minutes, not even speaking of hours, but when it came to strawberry cakes, it turned ridiculous.

"I do not know how you aren't fat already, Erza", you mused and put your chin onto your palm, still watching that food orgy of hers "But I guess that's okay, Ichiya likes your body just the way you are."

Even though she was wearing armor, you could see the shivers running down her spine and her face growing blue as she choked on that cake.

"Stop that", she didn't like being teased with a matter as serious as Ichiya, not even by you "You know exactly he gives me the chills every time."

You shrugged and turned back to the field inside of the Domus Flau arena in Krokus, watching the pair of wizards fight it out. Although you were no part of a guild, you were busy cheering on for Fairy Tail whenever they entered the field.

Yeah, sure, there were shouts of boos and the mocking of the other guilds but with Erza alone, they couldn't be any worse than the best.

You just knew it.

Even when the both of you were just kids and surely no force to reckon with, she wasn't just a surprisingly powerful mage but also kind and caring for those in her family. She was everything that made you change minds back then and you couldn't have been more grateful. It was only then that you realized just what exactly it was that you were doing and you felt so dirty the moment it became clear as day.

You snapped out of your stupor before it became obvious you were lightyears away and focused on the matches ahead of you.

Snatching the list from Gray's hands (who was too absorbed into fighting off Juvia - as always) to take a glimpse at the letters, you let out a sigh of defeat.

"Can I have a piece too?"

Just as you felt your eyes sliding shut, Natsu bumped into you, nearly making you fall over the handrails but at least, you were awake now.

"Is it finally over?" you leaned back and let out a yawn "Thank God!"

After all, you weren't that much into stuff like tournaments, Fairy Tail was basically the only reason for you to come into this cave of pent-up masses.

Nobody answered you, either tired as well or already on their way through the door and out of the arena, back to their sweet sweet home. You got up quickly and grabbed Erza (still next to you but with a very empty plate - you could only guess Mira had sacrificed her even more cakes) to get out.

It was just then that you noticed how far the sun has gone westwards making you suppress another yawn that made its way up. You got to go to bed soon enough anyway so no need to rush.

The way back out was surprisingly swift and without running into any hostile guilds (lucky you). So you were out before Natsu broke something or bumped into somebody.

"Let's go grab something to eat, (Y/N)? You coming?", you heard Gray's voice from behind you, making you turn around and give him a bright smile - only to decline.

"I'd love to, really, but there is that thing I need to get done yet. Don't worry, I'll be back soon, just start without me.", your voice was sweet enough that you nearly even betrayed yourself, if it hadn't been for that tiny tiny voice in your head.

Why don't you just tell them?

But you brushed it off without a second thought, no need to worry your friends about your self-made worries and troubles.

"Okay...", Erza didn't seem as convinced as you would've liked "You sure?"

A simple nod was enough to soothe her and so, you made your way back into town, taking a stroll through the streets devoid of people or friends. You were alone with your thoughts and the memories that came with them.

You sighed making eye contact with the horizon to take in the way the sun was drowning beneath these parts of bustling streets and places.

You hadn't missed the silence that came with the night for you had heard it over and over again in those sleepless nights.

It shamed you to this day that you hadn't noticed the way he was using you, cocooning you in soft and sweet words to make your finger bleed from hard work and your skin shining from the sweat and tears spilled for him. The worst part of it all was that damned silent voice within you, asking again and again if what you were doing was right.

How could you build weapons of mass destruction meant for thousands with a straight face?

How dared you think sacrificing people to a black wizard could be a way to achieve paradise?

How did you fail to notice that you would never be able to sleep after you were so willing to make these sacrifices more for him than for Zeref after all?

Who knew.

Did I know?

You wondered for years if maybe, just maybe, you had known what you were doing. You probably weren't even able to throw the cloak of ignorance over your shoulders to save yourself from the cold feeling of guilt.

Shame, shame on you.

You hated the way he made you feel so far away from everything like he had built a place away from the wars and the screams of the world, simply made for the two of you.

And again, you failed to notice how it was only the mist caught in between your fingers.

"(Y/N)?"

At first, you thought it was only the back of your mind, playing tricks on you by reviving past days and voices. But after some seconds, you had noticed the silhouette nearby and wondered if you had heard his voice.

Maybe you were going crazy.

At first, you noticed the dark blue hair, sticking out to spite the cloak it was put under, then that tattoo you would notice everywhere.

Jellal Fernandes.

Surprisingly enough, your panicking mind took it upon itself to react, stumping you with the bright - borderline hysterical - laugh that came out of your mouth.

You just couldn't help it. The way he appeared after decades with nothing to say but your name just about the moment you had wallowed in self-hate and guilt was just ridiculous.

Jellal stood quiet, not even his face gave away whatever irritated look he might have had, giving your laugh an untimely end. And that was just about what you needed to come back to your right set of mind.

"What are you doing here?" You didn't bother the biting hate in your voice or the way his shoulders slumped from your tone.

"I came because Erza told me you would be here.", he started when he had straightened again "She said it wouldn't be a good idea but I came because I wanted to speak to you."

You didn't trust the way this man looked so sad. You couldn't.

Not even enough to sit next to him when he scuffled over to the next bench and gestured for you to take a seat.

Not ever, not in a thousand years would you take that seat.

So you stood like a tree, unmoving and unwavering in your place, staring at him and ready to defend yourself by any means.

Would he try anything funny?

From the way, you knew him back then? Definitely.

Surprisingly though, he didn't try to press you into sitting down, instead starting to talk about whatever it was that lead him back to you.

"It took me a very long time to properly realize what had happened in the Tower of Heaven" he started "I did things in there that I never remembered to have said or done, horrible things. And when I remembered, it was like watching through the glass as someone else moved my body."

For the blink of an eye, his hand hovered over his head before he opted to pull down his hood and revealed the dark blue hair. Jellal sighed before he put his face in his hands for a few moments as if he was trying to get ahold of his last pieces of sanity.

"And when I understood what I had done, I felt so, so guilty. I tried to sacrifice hundreds - no, thousands of people, I manipulated you, Milliana, and the others to work for my cause. The worst of it all was the way I led you to believe in the lies I told you over and over again. I remember that look of adoration in your eyes and I misused it for these terrifying things."

The way he spoke of these sins the two of you committed so easily made you relive the shame of it over and over again. It was like your mind couldn't stop.

"I need to atone for these sins, for the things I did to you, and I wanted to start by telling you how sorry I am for the way I treated you and led you into believing these tales.

I do not ask for you to forgive me or to see beyond that, I came here to apologize because that is what you deserve."

For the first time since he started talking, he looked into your eyes as if waiting for your response and your mind came to an abrupt halt.

What exactly was it what you were feeling?

Hate?

Sadness?

Anger?

...No.

For the first time in forever, you could sympathize with him - that person who you had thought of as a monster for much longer than you wanted to admit. He had been taken advantage of and used to do whatever malicious things asked of him. He did not have a choice.

What did he feel like when he discovered how many people had been suffering under him? Was it sorrow? Betrayal? Shock? Or even anger?

And only when you were ready to answer was it that you too were looking into these dark eyes.

"I remember every damn word you spoke whenever you looked at me so fondly and I remember how you laughed at me for even believing in your farce. " you didn't try to cover up the bitterness sneaking in when you recalled your heart break into pieces just like that.

"And now that you are sitting in front of me, asking for forgiveness, I don't even feel the hate anymore." it had stilled to numbness in your heart, always there, but only with that hollow feeling, never leaving.

"I cannot forget", you further explained feeling unshed tears prick in your eyes "My memories have become a part of me and they will never leave again. A Sorry won't fix everything."

By then, two or three tears escaped over your face before you could wipe them away, not escaping Jellals gaze.

He turned to look at the ground for a few seconds, then he moved off the bench and cast a sad smile at you, only to walk away from you as if that was his clue to disappear back into the night.

Only when you understood where he going, you set into motion, reaching out for his hand.

"But..."

The blue-haired male revolved when he felt your hand in his, soft as in those memories he still held close. His eyes became wide at the side of your tearing and red eyes, paired with that tiny, hopeful smile directed at him.

"But... I won't give up on you."

His mouth carved up to mirror your smile as he squeezed your hand just like sunlight kissing your skin.

[will-on-the-internet]

Saturday Mornings | Aaron Hotchner

Summary: On a Saturday morning, Aaron has no plans other than making sure he gets all the kisses he wants from you. Dad! Hotch!

Warnings: Allusions to sex, Children!

Prompt:“My kiss quota for the day hasn't been filled. I need a thousand more."

A/N: Thank you anon who requested this! You fulfilled my goal of getting up another fic this week, and it’s my first fluffly Aaron fic!

Word Count: 1.1k

PLEASE INTERACT FOR MORE AARON HOTCHNER FICS!

Aaron Hotchner never liked waking up early. He didn’t like having to leave his bed before sunrise or sacrificing those precious last minutes in bed with you to go get ready for work. But on days where the team had time off, or even on the occasional weekend that Hotch didn’t end up in the office filing reports, he made it his mission to stay in bed as long as he could.

This morning was no exception, his body still nestled within the blankets of your shared bed, hair messy and face pressed into the pillow, as he let out small snores that made you smile softly. You swept a hand through his hair, palm caressing his cheek gently as he hummed, and subconsciously moved to nuzzle his cheek further into your touch.

The television was already blaring downstairs, your young daughter and Jack up early to catch the Saturday morning cartoons that they loved so much. Pulling yourself away from the warmth of your husband, you left the bed and shut the bedroom door behind you, attempting to give him some tiny more moments of peace before your daughter came racing upstairs for her daddy to make pancakes and for Jack to beg him for a game of football.

You knew that Aaron wouldn’t wake up for another hour at least, giving you time to give the children their bowls of cereals and flicking the TV on to whatever channel then took their fancy. Grabbing a cup from the cupboard you poured yourself a cup of coffee that you brewed while the kids fought over where they wanted to sit on the couch; with Jack giving up against his sister and letting her sit on the large leather armchair his father loved.

“And here I was hoping that I’d get to spend some more time with you in bed this morning.” Aaron startled you out of your thoughts as he stepped behind you and wrapped his strong arms around your waist, head ducking to rest in the crook of your neck.

“You know how these two are, baby. All they care about is food and tv on a Saturday morning, someone had to give in to their demands.” Your tone is teasing, and it makes Aaron grin against the skin of your neck where he’s littering small kisses, lips warm and hands snaking under the material of your sleep shirt.

“You could have woken me up, and then I would have come straight back to you…might even had a chance to try for another ba--.” Suddenly your daughter was up and racing across the living room, eyes wide as she noticed her father standing behind you, and soon the pair of you were moving away from each other so he could scoop her up in his arms, holding her tight to his chest and smothering her tiny face with kisses.

“DADDY! Jack, daddy’s awake! Will you make us pancakes?” Everyone in the family knew that your daughter had Aaron wrapped around his finger, and even he couldn’t deny that when he looked down at the girl in his arms and grinned the grin that was only reserved for her.

“What? I don’t even get a kiss from my favourite girl before she demands pancakes?” He leaned back against the counter, pouting at his daughter who only giggled and pressed her chubby hands to his face, laughing as he ducked in for kisses once again. “Oh well, I guess I’ve got all day to get the kisses I want from my favourite people.” As she started to wriggle in his arms, he gently put her down and watched her run back towards the TV, before he turned back to you.

He didn’t hesitate to back you against one of the counters then, arms bracing himself on either side of you as you leaned in closer, lips hovering inches away from yours as the both of you ignored the sounds of the TV and your children’s noises of joy as their favourite cartoon started.

And that’s when Aaron kissed you for the first time that morning, soft and sweet with a touch of need that seemed to swallow you up as his arms held you to him and his hand wandered down your waist. It was a kiss that told you everything you needed to know, that he didn’t care that you had morning breath mixed with the scent of coffee, or that your hair was still a mess after just rolling out of bed. All Aaron wanted right then was to kiss you, to feel your warm body against yours as the two of you, both parents who hardly got a moment to themselves anymore, were finally able to take a breath and relax into each other.

Pulling away, you let out a shaky breath, slightly unsteady on your feet as Aaron’s grip loosened only slightly. He smiled, teeth and all that made your stomach erupt in butterflies and your cheeks heat up.

“Good morning, sweetheart.” Pressing his forehead to yours, Aaron spoke quietly, not wanting to disturb the peace the two of you were surrounded by. You smiled, reaching up to card a hand through his hair, scratching at his scalp slightly in a way that you knew would make him go crazy, a low groan leaving his mouth as he looked back at you.

“You know, JJ is going to pick up the kids in ten to have a day with Henry and Michael, and as much as I love standing here in the kitchen with you, I think our day would be more productive back upstairs, in our bed, and under the covers.” Aaron kissed you as you spoke, stealing small breaths and making you giggle as he pulled away, brows quirking up at his suggestion.

"Well, I have absolutely no objects to that plan, baby. And do you want to know why?” You nodded in response to your husband, watching as his gaze wandered down your figure before lingering on your lips just as he stole another kiss. “My kiss quota for the day hasn't been filled. I need a thousand more."

Aaron wasn’t home in the mornings much, and he certainly wasn’t still in bed at nearly three pm on a Saturday morning, with your body on top of his and covers over your warm figures, smiling up at you with such love and want and longing that it made his mind cloud with a fog, as you pressed kisses to the side of his neck and let your hands roam his broad chest. For Aaron, this was the perfect Saturday with his favourite lover, slow, lazy, and wrapped up in so much warmth and need that neither of you ever wanted to leave.

Aaron Hotchner certainly had his kiss quota filled that day, and to his absolute joy, so, so much more. 

ASK TO BE ADDED TO THE HOTCH TAGLIST!

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[ererokii]

Heyyyyy, so I just finished the Aot 2 game and was kinda messed up by the ending... sooo in honor of that, could you possibly write something about the reader sacrificing herself to distract the Titans so that everyone can get away safe and she doesn’t come back for a few years? I’d prefer something with Jean but it’s completely up to you! Thanksssss

Thank you so much for requesting, I had a fun time writing this and I hope you love it!

For those that don’t know, this is based off of the Attack on Titan 2 game! This contains some spoilers from the game!

Year 3, 850

Three years of intense training are now behind me as today is the long-awaited graduation. Unfortunately, I could not come in the top ten, but Shadis believes that I have potential. My goal from the beginning hasn’t changed. I plan to dedicate my heart to the Scouts and take out the armored titan myself. 

Y/N

XX, 850

Reiner and Bertholdt escaped, and we were able to retrieve Eren and Ymir. Not long after the fight with them, we gained insight that Wall Sina has been breached. This is it. Now or never. The battle to keep our human race alive was at stake. I will not let defeat take over my body. 

Y/N

Jean’s eyes scan over the series of letters in the journal that belonged to an assumed fallen comrade. Every day for the past three years, it has always been the same routine. 

Get up, train, socialize with comrades and read this journal. 

By now, he wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t have memorized the whole book. Each inked word seemed to lose its meaning, and its color as the pages began to fade away, just like his hope did. 

The tips of his fingers grazed the rough sheets of paper, a lump forming in the back of his throat. No matter how many times he has read this, he can never shake off the dull aching pain in his heart when he realized he had looked over the last entry once again. 

Currently, he’s sitting in his room, the window open that allows the cool breeze to wash over his body. Goosebumps form on the nape of his neck as he shifts his attention to the walls in the distance. The moon took its place in the sky, the light shining down on the walls as if it were mocking him. 

His tongue peeks out and swipes across his lower chapped lip, hoping that the wetness is enough to moisture them. His fingers continually flip through the pages after the last entry, staring down at the blank pieces of faded white sheets.

The vivid images replay in his mind on the day Wall Sina was breached. Reiner, Bertholdt, and the Beast Titan were all there. The Beast Titan was a surprise to everyone. Out of all the battles, Jean has fought, this one was by far the most blood-curdling. The thought of humanity dying out on that field was enough to ignite a feeling in all the soldiers. 

When Eren and the rest of the scouts defeated Reiner for the second time, there was enough time to take Annie’s crystal back to an underground cellar. But because it weighed more, the horses were at a disadvantage. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Jean likes to think that you survived. Maybe you were residing in the new buildings of Wall Maria once the scouts took it back. Perhaps you didn’t want to be apart of the Scouts anymore— then maybe you would be safe. 

The slamming of the door catches his attention as the sound of pants and coughs are heard. 

“Jean!”

“What, Connie?” He sighs and slicks his hair back. “What could you possibly want at this hour?”

“S-Someone’s approaching headquarters! I think it’s Y/N!”

His body grows cold at the sound of your name. “Y/N..?” He whispers underneath his breath, thinking that his mind was playing games. “How are you so sure?”

“The person is wearing the Scout uniform with no horse! We haven’t been scouting outside! It has to be her! It can only be her!”

“That has to be impossible,” he stands abruptly from his wooden chair, stalking towards his comrade. “She’s dead.”

“Weren’t you the one who told us to have faith?!”

“I did. A year ago. It’s been three years, Connie. She’s not coming back.”

“Jean,” he whispers, unsure if he heard right. “We all know you were heartbroken when she sacrificed herself but—“

“She’s gone, Connie!” His arm swings out as his fist collides with the wall, a surge of pain shooting through his arm. “Because I couldn’t help, she’s dead! We were useless! Maybe we should have let Reiner take Annie back so she would be here! But she’s dead!” 

His voice cracks as a lump grows in his throat, limiting the use of words. His nails dig into his palms, nowhere near, causing the amount of pain he felt within his heart. 

Only a few minutes pass as Connie leaves his friend alone, not wanting to upset him further. 

Jean’s mind begins to flood with the memory of your departure. His eyes are squeezed shut as the clear liquid runs down his face, damping the wood of the desk underneath his arms that rest under his head. His grown out hair sways slightly from the cold air that sent shivers down his spine. 

“The horses can’t go as fast with that big thing in the cart! There’s just too much weight!” Connie yelled out as he and Jean steered the horses forward as Titans trailed from behind. 

You, Mikasa, Eren, and the crystal that held Annie sat in the cart. The horses ran at top speed. Your fingers gripped the leather of the journal, nails pressing against the material. 

Your eyes are trained on the hoard of Titans that seem to get closer and closer by the minute. 

“Any minute, they’ll be on us!”

“I know that, Connie!” Jean grunts and glances over his shoulder. The determination in his voice washes away as his eyes widened, face growing pale as he watches you slide the journal into Eren’s hand as he lies unconscious. 

He was no fool to know what you would do. The air is knocked out of his lungs as the faint noise of the gear rings in his ears. It’s like he’s living in slow motion. His mouth opens as he screams out for you, begging to keep you on the cart.

Your alluring eyes bore into his own as your lips curve into a small smile, mouthing something to him as a hook shoots out from its confinement and into a tree, shooting your body forward. 

A hoarse sob leaves his mouth as he sits up, covering his face with his hand as his shoulder shakes violently. Jean can feel himself washing away from reality and falling into the deep void that was his heart as he cries. Each waking second he knows he’s becoming insane.

As harsh as reality was, the man wanted to live in his fantasy world, where you were still aliv—

“Jean..”

His body stifled as he heard the sound of a voice he knew by heart and loved dearly. His pupils are wide in shock as he stares forward at the walls' chipping paint in his room. 

“Impossible,” he trails off in a whisper, hands beginning to shake in uncertainty. “It’s impossible..”

“Jean...turn around,” you whisper into the tense air, walking forward as the creaking of the floors alerted him of your presence. “Please?”

“Maybe I have finally lost it,” his voice comes out in a lower octave as he runs his hand through his hair. “I guess that’s what I get for not sleeping.”

“Jean, it’s me!” You plead as you place your hand on his shoulder, feeling how tense he was under your fingertips. “It’s me..Y/N.” 

“No, she’s dead. I saw her leave us. You aren’t even here. You’re just a figure of my imagination to make me feel better so I won’t wallow in my pity.”

Your heart aches at his confession as you suddenly wrap your arms around him from behind, burying your head in his neck as your hair tickled at his exposed skin. “I’m home now, Jean,” your voice cracks as tears well up, the liquid hitting against him. “I’m back..”

“How can you?” He questions, relaxing upon touch. From a face showing sorrow, it shifted into one of seriousness. “I s-saw you leave us. You can’t be alive..it has to be a joke.”

“I survived Jean..can’t you see?” You press your cold hand against his warm cheek, feeling his warmth radiated off of his face. “I’m here..flesh and blood. I’m alive...I came back to you.”

Jean tilts his head to gaze up at you; his mouth parted as he gazed into your eyes. All the words he had to say now left his mind as his lips became parched, peeling his tongue out to lick them. “You are here..”

“I am!” You laugh through the tears, cupping his face in your hands. “I was in a shelter in Wall Rose. I was injured for a long time before I was able to return here.”

Words couldn’t express how the boy was feeling, only actions. He abruptly wrapped his arms around your torso, bringing you flush against his body. “You’re here now..”

All of his worries and hidden thoughts could now be thrown out the window and buried deep underneath the earth, a place he would never have to reach. You were alright, alive and breathing.

And especially in Jean’s arms.

[emitheduck]

So. We're Soulmates? (Bucky x Reader)

A/N: my first soulmate AU, and I figured it was finally time, and bucky deserved one lol. no spoilers whatsoever

Soulmate AU where you have your soulmate’s birthday tattooed on your arm ---

March 10th, 1917.

(Y/n) had always thought, there was no possible way that the universe had ever, ever gotten her soulmate’s birthday right. When everyone was celebrating that their soulmate was around the same age as them, she got to look down in horror as she could practically see her soulmate’s life fly by. There was legitimately no possible way that her soulmate would even still be alive.

The rules of the soulmate were strange, and no one ever understood them or questioned them. It was found out sometime in the 80s that the dates on peoples forearms weren’t random--but the birthday of their soulmate. Because the universe was a cosmic nightmare, when someone’s soulmate died, the numbers went with them.

That’s what made this so strange.

Either (Y/n)’s soulmate was hanging onto life support, or the universe had fucked up and decided it was going to trick her into thinking she could find happiness like everyone else.

She had these feelings up until she got the faithful call one day, that she had landed the job with SHIELD and found out that she would be working in the helicarrier during the attack on New York. And that’s how she met Steve Rogers.

“You know, it’s kind of funny.” Steve sighed with a chuckle, shaking his head as he followed (Y/n) who was leading him to where he would be staying.

“What is?” She asked as she typed in the access code for one of the doors as they walked.

“The number on your arm. That’s my friend’s birthday.” Steve was smirking as he walked into his room. “I mean, it was his birthday.”

(Y/n) looked down at the date on her arm and sighed, her hand instinctively covering the date. “You sure he’s dead? Not some hundred-year-old veteran in a nursing home that you haven’t checked in on or something?” She was trying her best to not sound horrible for joking about his friend's death, but he seemed almost amused by her banter.

“Last I checked, he’s dead. I watched him fall off the train and everything.” He told her as he sat down on the edge of his bed. “His name was Bucky.” He told her as she turned around to leave, watching her stop for a moment to listen before she left.

Steve’s words always lingered in the back of her mind ever since that day on the helicarrier. She had seen the Bucky memorial spot in the museum, and the day she found out that he was alive, she would never forget (mostly because when it happened, she had dropped the bottle of wine she was holding on the floor and spent hours picking up tiny shards of glass).

The year was now 2023. Five years after the blip, and (Y/n) now fully retired from SHIELD. She left on good terms, but the years of working were just exhausting. Especially now that she came back after vanishing for five years and had to rebuild her life all over again. At least they were respectful, and were happy to give her the pay that she had missed out on.

It was hard enough having to deal with knowing all your close friends sacrificed themselves for the whole world, and not being able to do anything about it. That was the reason that kept her up most nights. The guilt of feeling like she could have done something, but never got the chance to, was the hardest feeling.

That’s what led (Y/n) to walking aimlessly around the grocery store at almost 2am. When she couldn’t sleep, sometimes the best thing to do was walk around pushing the cart and praying that the LED lights would calm her down enough to go home and face the empty apartment.

What she didn’t expect was turning the corner of the frozen section and crashing her cart into someone elses. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry I wasn’t paying attention.” (Y/n) apologize as she looked at the man in front of her. “I should have been looking. I guess I’m just tired.”

“I’m probably just tired too.” He chuckled, pulling his cart away from hers. Both the carts were empty anway. “You come here to walk around at night too?”

“How could you tell?” (Y/n) laughed, running a hand through her hair as she looked him over. He looked familiar, and knowing her luck he was some assassin that was stalking her, and came here to finish the job.

He motioned to their empty carts with a bob of his head. “Something about just pushing the carts around and listening to the crappy music makes me feel better too.” He smirked as he never broke eye contact. “Also, people normally buy food when they’re shopping.”

(Y/n) sighed, nodding. “You caught me. I’m just here to wander.”

“It’s okay. I am too. Sometimes staring at the TV isn’t enough.” He mumbled, shaking his head as he broke eye contact to look where his hands were gripping the handle of the cart. “Sorry, I’m just rambling I guess.”

“No, I get it.” She laughed it off, knowing it was late and sometimes people just kept talking when they were tired. “My names (Y/n).” She smiled, holding out her hand for him to shake.

He seemed to hesitate, but reached out and shook her hand. “My name’s Bucky.”

She could feel her mouth go dry. “Bucky?” There was just no, possible way that this was the man who has been in the back of her mind for years on end.

“I’m guessing you know who I am.” He muttered, already preparing himself to turn around and forget this interaction never happened. “Sorry, I should go.”

“Wait! No, I didn’t mean it like that.” (Y/n) exclaimed as she held her hands out to stop him from leaving. “I just have heard so much about you--not the way you think, it sounds so weird. I talked to Steve about you once, way back before the battle of New York.”

She peaked his interest at the mention of Steve. “You knew Steve?”

(Y/n) nodded. “He told me all about you. Look, I even have your birthday on my arm.” She told him, lifting up her sleeve to show him the date on her arm, watching his eyes go wide out of shock. “Steve liked to always tease me that I had your birthday, and I always told him that I probably had some old man, sitting in some hospital bed, decaying before our eyes. Wow, I am rambling, I am so sorry. I should leave.” She was bright red as she decided to just leave her cart where it was and accept the humiliation and leave.

“No, you don’t have to go.” Bucky told her, gently grabbing her arm to stop her from leaving. “I guess now that you showed me yours, I’ll show you mine.” He grinned as he let go of her arm, using his left hand to pull up his long sleeve. There on his arm, in bold black numbers was (Y/n)’s birthday clear as day.

“Do you maybe want to go get coffee at that 24 hour place across the street? We might have a bit we need to talk about.” She was dumbfounded. Steve would always tease and joke, telling her that Bucky was her soulmate just because it was the same birthday on her arm. But due to the fact that he was presumed dead for so long, (Y/n) never thought anything of it.

“Are you going to come inside? I’ve been holding the door open for almost a minute.” Bucky asked, laughing a little uncomfortably as he watched the woman just stand at the door of the diner. She didn’t even remember the walk to get there.

(Y/n) blinked, rubbing her eyes as she nodded and walked inside. The sign said seat yourself, and she found a nice seat by the window for the two of them. “Sorry. I guess I’m just a little speechless.”

He chuckled as he shifted in the booth. “I’ll be honest. Me too.”

“So. We’re soulmates.” She shrugged, feeling uncertain of herself. Finding her soulmate was never the first thing on her mind, because she never actually thought that she would find him. Sure, the universe also had a way of making the two cross paths at some point, but because of the age, she never cared.

“When I used to see the date on my arm, I thought it was a joke.” He told her, mumbling that he wanted a coffee when the waiter walked over and asked what they wanted. “She wants a coffee. Two cream, one sugar.” He said as the other man nodded and walked away.

“How did you know my coffee order?” She asked with a raise of her eyebrow.

Bucky opened his mouth like he was about to speak but sighed. “I legit have no idea. My brain was working for me, and it just came out.”

(Y/n) laughed. “I mean, we’re cosmically linked so it does make sense.” The coffee was set down in front of them and she smiled as she held onto the mug. “Is this when I ask if you can tell me about yourself?”

“Where do I start?” He asked as he set his coffee down after taking a sip. “My name is James Buchanan Barnes, but I go by Bucky. James is only for when shit hits the fan I guess.”

“I think I prefer Bucky.” She smiled, watching as his cheeks turned red for a moment.

“What about you Doll? What fun thing do you have to tell me?” Bucky asked her with a smirk, making it her turn to blush.

“I worked for SHIELD, that’s where I met Steve. But then there was that time we found out that Hydra was inside of SHIELD, and technically you tried to kill me.” She pointed out, watching as he put his head down in shame. “But that’s all in the past now. I’m not that person anymore.”

He took a sip of his coffee before he spoke. “What changed?”

(Y/n) sighed, shaking her head as she held onto her coffee mug for warmth. “I was pretty close with Steve and Natasha. Tony helped me get the job at SHIELD, too. Three people that I looked up to more than anything, were gone before I ever got a chance to say goodbye.” She told him, knowing that there would be no more tears left to cry. Her tear-ducts seemed to stop working after she had cried for days straight that they were gone.

“I wasn’t very close to anyone but Steve, but I do understand how you feel.” He told her, leaning across the table to rest a hand on her shoulder. “Do you live in the city?”

“I live pretty close to Hell’s Kitchen.” She told him, watching as he nodded. “I’m guessing you live in Brooklyn?”

He looked a little surprised, but still smiled. “How could you tell?”

She smiled back, a little shy. “Some part of me just knew, but the other part of me heard Steve talk about Brooklyn all the time. He loved it there, and I guess I thought you did too.”

“It’s definitely still amazing, but a lot has changed. I’m still getting used to it all.” Bucky confessed, putting down some money for the coffee as they both finished and stood up from the table.

(Y/n) checked her phone and sighed at the time. 3:30 in the morning, and there was no way she was going to sleep now. Now, she was going to ride the train and hope that the rocking of the subway would be enough to turn her mind off for a while. “I should get going. It’s getting late, and I’m taking the train back.”

He nodded, seeming a little uneasy that she was about to leave. “Do you maybe want my number? We could meet up someday, maybe get to know eachother better?”

She grinned as she handed him her phone. “Put your number in.” She told him as they traded phones, smirking as she put in her contact. “I put my information as (Y/n)-Soulmate, just in case you seemed to forget.”

“Oh trust me, I don’t think I’ll ever forget.” Bucky chuckled as he looked at her contact. “Promise you’ll call?”

“Considering the fact I’ve known you for a few hours, and I’m already completely head-over-heels for you, I don’t think you have to worry.” (Y/n) told him, leaning up and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. “Bye for now, but not bye forever.”

Bucky was grinning like an idiot, and he knew it. “I like the sound of that. I still just can’t believe I found you after all these years.”

“You better believe it, because you’re going to be seeing a lot more of me from now on.”

MASTERLIST

[writingsfromhome]

Water under the Bridge (Josslyn II)

A/N: Okay! Here it is!!!! This was fun and made my heart hurt a little but maybe I’m just being emotional. And can you guys believe it’s been over a year since I posted Josslyn?? Where has the time gone?? I don’t think we’re on the sacred timeline anymore........Anyway thank you anon who suggested this storyline, and hope y’all enjoy! <3

Josslyn (Original)

------

We’re going to have the best weekends evr, Regan texts me even though she’s just in the other room. Schedules were released for our summer semester and Regan and I had managed to get Fridays off. Summer was going to be so fun, and after two years doing college together we were experts at managing our workload to have fun on the weekends--even if that meant sacrificing a few nights’ sleep.

We’ll make summer our bitch, I text back. I hear a chuckle from her room.

Help me pick out a fit? she texts. I want to tell her Adam would love her in whatever, but I head to her room instead and watch her try on a dozen outfits before settling on the second. I tease her about Adam--they were going steady since first year, but she still got so nervous about him sometimes. Adam’s college was a train ride away so he would come down at least one weekend a month.

As for my own love life, there’d been no one steady. I did the whole hooking up and dating scene in first year but I was romantically burnt out by second. Nowadays, I could go home with someone if I chose to, but I also didn’t mind if I didn’t. My active endeavor to find a boyfriend had stopped when I realized I was trying to fill a gap. Instead, I was learning to be happy on my own.

“Are you sure I can’t convince you?” Regan asks. She was taking the train to Adam’s college and staying with him, there was this big start-of-summer party and she’d been trying to convince me for weeks.

“I don’t feel like being a third wheel,” I tell her honestly.

“You don’t have to!” She goes over her one argument again. “Gaelle’s roommate isn’t even back until next week so she has a spare room! She said you should come. Plus,” she ties her hair up, “it’s the weekend before the semester starts so have some fun.”

I make a noise, and she turns to look at me, totally judging me. It makes me laugh. “That’s why my version of fun is to.binge Netflix and-”

“Y/N!” She groans.

“Fine! I’ll go.”

Two words that would change everything.

***

By the time we get to the campus, Regan and I had come up with a dozen things we could potentially do this summer. I’m high on excitement as we meet up with Gaelle, and the three of us head to Adam’s place.

The sun is almost set by the time we leave, most of the sky is dark but a streak of orange stays stubbornly on the horizon. I pause to take pictures before we’re rushing off.

We approach the frat house--if you could call it that. It was half glass with a very modern structure. The greek symbol on the side of the house was the only indicator it wasn’t a millionaire’s summer-house.

“Since when did frat houses get so modern?” I ask. “This is...nice.”

“Wait ‘til you see inside,” Adam says. And he was right, even the drinks were fancier with their own guy behind the bar...although he was taking the occasional shot and getting progressively drunk.

We settle in an area close to the music and get swept up into the party atmosphere. Some people were beyond drunk already and I enjoyed the slight buzz of the drink in my hand. The views from inside with floor-to-ceiling windows were amazing.

Pretty soon, Adam and Regan break off. We move towards the centre of the party where the typical party shenanigans were happening. We tip back our drinks and pretty soon I’m straddling the line between tipsy and drunk. I find a cute boy with blonde hair and deep brown eyes and makeout with him until he gets too handsy.

“Ugh!” I give him one last shove and look for Gaelle but I’d lost her too. I search for a bathroom but they’re either occupied or have a lineup. This was a huge ass house, one of the bedrooms had to have one.

I open the first door to shouting.

“It’s called locking the door!” I shout drunkenly as I close it. The next room actually is locked, and the next one isn’t but I wish it was. “Eugh.”

I climb up to the topmost level, three doors--one was locked with the sound of people inside and the second is a bathroom. I was grateful people hadn’t made it up this far.

As I wash up, and touch up the mascara that was crusting under my eyes the door shakes as someone bangs on it from the other side.

“Dip! What the fuck are you doing in there? Everyone’s waiting for you!”

My heart pounds at the sudden noise and the deep voice demanding me to open up. The rush of adrenaline sobers me for a moment as I rush to open the door, “Sorry I didn’t realise anyone was...waiting.”

My words slow down and freeze altogether as I realise the fist banging on the door belonged to...him. Harry. He seems just as surprised as me, straightening up before a smile slowly inches across his face, it was almost sweet bordering on predatory. “Y/N!”

“Hi,” I say awkwardly. There was a lot of history and also not at all. I was also, I decide, too drunk for this. Act sober, this is not the night to run into this fucker.

“You-you’re the last person I was expecting to--excuse me it’s... good to see you! You look--you look as beautiful as ever!”

The events from high school that created this tense history between Harry and I was one of the worst things possible to happen to teenage Y/N. The thing is though, that I’d totally bounced back after I had decided he could fuck himself. Although it was awkward seeing him every day until graduation, it made me tougher. I credit it for making me so casual about relationships now...I stopped expecting so much of the boys I saw.

But leaving high school behind, my world expanded with college, I realised how childish it had all been: I’d had a fling with a player, and he’d played the field...It wasn’t that deep. But seeing him now, It made me aware in a way I wasn’t for a long time. Maybe what they said about distance had some merit. Or maybe I was just buzzed.

“Thanks...I wasn’t expecting you either.”

“You don’t uh, you don’t go here do you? I’ve never seen you around.”

“No,” I look out to the small hall but there’s no one there. The room that was previously locked is slightly ajar carrying male voices. “Adam goes here, I’m...with Regan.”

“Ah, Regan.” He smiles. “You’re still two peas in a pod?”

“Obviously,” The stiffness eases at the mention of my best friend. “So...can I get out of here?”

“Yeah sorry,” he moves aside so I can step into the hall. “Um, we’re playing video games in here room if you...you’re probably not interested.”

I clear my throat, Harry was playing video games when there was a party downstairs? I was curious, that maybe he changed.

“Oh,” he laughs and the dimples I adored make an appearance. “I’ve still got it! My frat just hosts too many parties for me to keep track.”

I guess I said that out loud, I bite my tongue but it really has a life of it’s own. “Did you jussay you still got it?” Oh my god, I was teasing him already. What about Harry made me absolute putty.

“Yeah,” he looks almost bashful. “Uhm, go easy I’m a little nervous here Y/N.”

I don’t know what to say to that, I bite my lip so nothing stupid comes out.

“So you’re just here for the night?” He carries on.

“Staying over with a friend,”

“A fr-” he cuts himself off, pressing his lips together. I realize I’m staring and look away.

“I should go-”

“Wait I-wait uh, how have you been? I haven’t seen you in years.”

“Yea,” I play with the rings on my fingers. “M’good, great. College’s a lot better than high school.”

“It’s not even comparable,” Harry says as he leans his shoulder against the wall. He looks perfectly placed there, and a tipsy voice flashes inappropriate thoughts into my head. “So...any...boyfriends?”

“Um,” that was direct. “No. No, I’m trying out being single...”

“Did something happen?” His expression is still casual but he holds himself rigid.

“No? A girl can’t be single?”

“Sure but someone like you...I’m just surprised.”

“Whatever that means,” I roll my eyes and head past him to go down but he blocks my way.

“Wait, I didn’t mean to offend you...” his voice dies out as I cross my arms. “I also didn’t mean to block you in.”

He steps aside and it feels painful to me but I take the small steps towards the staircase. One part of me--I blame the tipsy stupid part, wants to kiss him just to see if there was still something there, see if anything’s changed. The other was listing all the reasons this was an awful idea, to top it off he was a proven player, has broken my trust once before, and went to a school almost 2 hours from mine.

“Y/N,” Harry’s gruff voice says from behind me. My feet turn without permission and he’s right behind me. “M’sorry. Let me start over.”

I glance at his lips, damn. I can’t meet his eye suddenly. Oh god, I was still pretty tipsy. My mind short-circuits and all I can do is turn back to walk away, down the two sets of stairs, past sweaty bodies and loose limbs. In a great coincidence I bump into Gaelle in what looks like a game room.

“Harry goes here?” I ask--shout at her immediately. Her eyes widen, something passes over her face. “Was no one going to tell me he was going to be here?”

“I’m sorry!” She shouts. “I forgot you two had history!”

“I just wish I was prepared,” I say and she doesn’t hear, I just shake my head when she asks me to repeat. I needed another drink, and Regan. Maybe she could remind me why I stopped caring about him.

As I set off to find her, I’m reminded again how stupid this all was. High school was an ancient dream, we were all different people. I was a different person.

But even though what happened in high school was petty and juvenile, I remember how Harry made me feel. How it felt when we were together--even if it was a joke for him back then, I couldn’t forget the feeling of being seen. Of having arms to fall into, even if I knew they weren’t permanent.

“Regan!” I find her sitting on the dining table while Adam spoke with someone else. Her eyes alight and she waves me over. “I saw him! He...he goes here!”

“Who?” Confusion strings her brows together.

“Harry! From...you know Harry! He was upstairs! I--I didn’t know how to act.”

“Shit Harry! I forgot he went here!”

“You knew?” I throw my hands up.

“I didn’t think it was a big deal! He’s a dick but that was high school?”

“No I-” I sigh. “You’re supposed to tell me he’s still a dick! I saw him and it just got...complicated.”

Regan slides off the table and pulls me into a side hug, we can also hear each other better. “You’re a big kid now, do whatever you want Y/N. Tell him off, kiss his face, take revenge, who the fuck cares? We’re taking the train two hours home after this anyway!”

She had a point. But still...he couldn’t have changed much from the boy who hurt me.

“Adam hangs out with him sometimes,” Regan continues. “Apparently he’s not as bad as high school. He’s...mellowed out.”

“Unreal,” I roll my eyes. Adam was just covering for his friend. We hear a cheer go up behind us and Regan bulges her eyes as two guys help Adam up on his hands to do a keg stand.

Regan swears and heads back to him. I walk away, somehow feeling more and less confused after talking to Regan--do I go back up and see what this leftover emotion was, or ignore it as a drunken need for comfort?

But it’s like the decision is made for me when a hand wraps around my arm as I move from the dining area to the kitchen. I already know it’s him before I turn.

“Can we talk?” he asks. I nod and his grip loosens, slipping down into my palm. “Upstairs?” He motions to the staircase and we climb up the two flights. This time he leads me into one of the locked doors and although I’ve never been here, I’d been in some version of this room before. It’s familiar.

I ignore the ache when he lets go of my hand once we’re inside. I set my drink down on his desk and perch on the window ledge, it’s not big enough to sit on but has enough space for a few of his books and a speaker. His room’s pretty near, but then again Harry was never messy.

“So what do you want-” I start just as he says “Let me get this off my chest.”

“Go ahead,” I cross my arms before uncrossing them, and then crossing them again. With the way he ruffles his hair and crosses to the door and back, he seems just as nervous.

“You can leave at any time. I just want to say I was an asshole, I still kind of am sometimes. And I’m sorry for what I did to you. I know it’s like what--2 years late but all that with...Josslyn and all that...I’m sorry.”

Hearing her name makes me want to grind my teeth but I let the feeling pass. I reach for my drink instead to give me something to do. “It’s all water under the bridge.”

“Really?” Harry regards me suspiciously. “Because the way you were talking to me out there...”

“You’re just you,” I shrug. “Harry Styles, player and sweet-talker. I was just guarding myself against that.”

“Because of what happened between us?”

“No...maybe. I don’t know. But honestly, I’m not upset with you. It feels like an eternity ago. I guess it’s just self-preservation.”

“I guess,” he echoes. “So where does that leave us? If you’re all self-preserved?”

I eye him but he cracks a smile, he was teasing me. “It doesn’t have to leave us anywhere,” I snort. “We’re water under the bridge Harry...”

“My parents split,” he says suddenly and I’m reeling with the direction he’s taken. I open my mouth, and close it when nothing comes out. “Sorry, I know that’s random it’s just I never really talked to anyone about how they were rarely home and when they were they were always arguing a-and we spoke about it a lot. About our families so I just...”

“I’m sorry to hear that, do they still live in town?” I ask, wanting to put my hand on his or show him I cared but they stay glued to my drink.

“My mom moved into the city, it’s closer to her job and since I’m not living at home anymore it doesn’t really matter...”

“You still go home?” I ask.

“I don’t even know where home is?” He looks at me then, and the look in his eyes chips at the wall I’d been trying to build all night. Things had changed, for him.

“Are you--do you have someone to talk to?”

His laugh is dry, “They split last summer, convinced me to talk to some therapist. I don’t know if it really helped I think I’m actually better off. They’re better off and I just feel...free.”

I don’t know what to say to that so I stay quiet. He looks back up at me then, cracks his knuckles, before perching on his bed. “I’m just--sorry I’m not telling you that so you can feel sorry for me-”

“I don’t I just-”

“No it’s okay I just want to tell you that because you knew about that stuff. But I’m trying to tell you I’m not the same guy. Not completely, I’m just trying to tell you things changed and so have I.”

It echoes the same sentiment I had earlier in his conversation, and I remember Regan said he’s mellowed out. Maybe it was true. It still didn’t mean I was going to get together with him anytime soon but my heart hurts for him. I walk up to where he sits, he watches me with a steady gaze.

In the quiet, I hear the party going on outside the window, three floors below us. If I listen really carefully, I can hear sounds coming from the video game being played next door. In the stillness, I reach for Harry’s hand and he obliges, grasping mine.

“I wish I could...help you with the hurt. Not knowing where to call home is pretty shitty.”

“Don’t worry about me Y/N,” he pastes on his classic smile and I return one for his sake. It was getting heavy in here. “I’m just happy I got to talk to you. And I just found out you don’t hate me so...” he holds our intertwined hands and shakes it. “woo hoo!” I laugh as we let go.

“I guess I should go back to the party.”

“Yeah, okay. I won’t keep you.”

“Okay,” I’m a little stung he doesn’t suggest I stay a little longer. Maybe it was all in my head, maybe his intentions really were to make amends and that’s it. I pick my drink up from his windowsill and move to the door. I glance back before I go, he’s laying on his bed deep in thought, gazing up at the ceiling. I close the door behind me.

***

I wake the next morning, surprisingly well. I can’t say the same for Gaelle who’d passed me her keys at some point and told me she’d be home late. I spent the rest of the party trailing Regan until I decided I should just go crash. Harry hadn’t come out to find me, and I tried to hide the sour feeling, excusing myself early.

“Fuck me,” Gaelle croaks from her bed when I step into her open doorway.

“How about coffee, and pancakes?” I ask, returning the favor of being able to sleep here.

“I’ll take it,” she flops back into bed. I busy myself with measuring coffee and water, my thoughts occupied with everything Harry and I had been through since we last saw each other. I demonized him for so long, humanizing him is harder to swallow.

What he’d done to me was shitty, there was no denying. But had he really changed? And most importantly, why did I care so much? It’s not like he was the one.

My phone rings: Regan. She’s talking so fast I hardly hear her, only really understand that it was a party ritual to gather in the student centre the morning after a big party. Endless coffee and free food seemed to be the general consensus for a party cure.

“I don’t know if I can make it there,” Gaelle says when I tell her. “I was hoping for pancakes at home.”

“I already put the coffee on but I’m hauling your ass there if you’re not up in 5. Our train leaves after noon anyway and it’s closer to the college.”

Slowly but surely Gaelle emerges and we make our way, spotting Regan easily as the bright spot in a sea of college students in PJs and last night’s clothing. She’s the only one fully dressed, with a full face of makeup on.

“I didn’t drink that much,” she shrugs when we settle around her and Adam’s friends. “Unlike some people.” She looks pointedly at Adam who’s slumped where he sits. I remember the kegger and laugh.

Life soon flows back into the group around us as does the coffee and breakfast foods. I’m relaxed in the environment until I look down the tables to where Harry stands, looking back at me. He raises a hand and I do the same until an extremely tall angel--she was literally wearing a halo, probably from last night-walks up to him and wraps her hands around his waist. She says something to him and he tears his gaze away.

I look down at my cup immediately, my cheeks burning with humiliation. I’d been thinking about him all this time, thinking about how it might feel if I kissed him and of course he had a girlfriend. She never came up, but he never said he didn’t either. He didn’t make any moves on me yesterday, if I looked at it he only made an attempt to talk. Sure he was flirty but that was just Harry and I...I was a fool. I was such a fool. Things may have changed for him but he hadn’t. He was still the same Harry who chose Josslyn over me. He would always have a girlfriend, I was just the girl from his past who he could trust. I couldn’t say the same about him.

“What’s wrong,” my best friend nudges me. “Are you feeling okay?”

“I don’t know,” I look into her concerned eyes. “I’m just going to--I’ll be right back.”

I head out and find the closest washroom. The tears are instant and I let myself cry--out of frustration, humiliation, or some twisted sense of betrayal...it was all the same for me. I check the time, I just had to hold myself together and avoid Harry for another 2 hours before we were back on the train home. I would tell Regan everything then.

*** Three weeks later ***

“If Adam’s over later...” Regan trails off. She’s sprawled on my bed while I sit in my desk chair trying to read one more chapter before I close the books for the week.

“I have my earplugs ready and a second place to stay,” I roll my eyes. “I already told Kiara I might crash on her couch.”

“I owe you,” she jumps back up.

“You owe me like, 7 and a half.”

“7 and a half?”

I’m about to answer but a knock on our door has her racing out. I try to ignore the voices, I just had two more pages I had to get through--the joy of summer classes.

“Y/N?: Regan’s voice is a whisper. “We’re going now but...you have a guest. If you want me to kick his ass I totally can though.”

Standing behind her is Harry. I focus on him, yes it really was him. Why was he here?

“Harry?” I sound confused because I am. He’s wearing a plain white t-shirt and jeans, and he’d traveled 2 hours just to get here.

“He wouldn’t leave me alone,” Adam says louder as they leave the room. “I’m sorry Y/N...”

“What is this?” I ask. My feelings are at war with each other, I was still feeling slighted by the last time we saw each other but seeing his face was also an exciting surprise.

“I wanted to see you,” Harry says nervously. He still stays at my bedroom door.

“You can come in...” I stand up and realize I was wearing an oversize t-shirt and the scruffiest PJ shorts I owned. “Phones have cameras now, you didn’t have to come all this way.”

He shrugs, taking one step in. “I liked seeing you in person last time. But I feel like we left it wrong.”

He knows I saw him, what conclusions I must have come to. It wouldn’t be that hard. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. We talked it out.”

He comes to life, “Don’t play dumb Y/N I know you saw me with...I know what you thought and-”

“Did you really come all this way to explain that you had a girlfriend? Like, three weeks later?”

“No that’s the thing-”

“Because that’s kind of dumb. And unnecessary-”

“No listen!” He says a bit louder so I do. “The thing is she wasn’t my girlfriend...we’d hung out a few times but she saw me at the caf and got clingy. We’re not an item honestly, I can’t remember the last time I had a girlfriend-.”

“So why are you here?” My voice is higher than usual. I was confused, and upset, and I wanted him to leave. This was starting to sound like Josslyn part 2.

“You know why I’m here. Y/N I’ve been nothing but a dick to you and I know I don’t deserve you but I really like you. I want to clear the air, and ask you if you can see something here I...”

He trails off when he notices the tears trailing down my cheek. It’s just too much for me, as I finally face the emotions from that weekend. I’d shoved them aside after Regan had gotten onto the train worried her and Adam were headed towards a breakup. I’d put aside what happened and never thought about it. But my heart broke a little that morning. 

I knew what I knew: maybe Harry and I weren’t good for each other but we were good with each other. In an attempt not to get hurt I’ve been distancing myself from romantic connections--I found more of myself in doing this, but a part of me was missing without exploring it.

Harry moved closer until we’re nearly touching. I wipe my tears with my shoulder and we stand still on the hardwood floors of my room. An eternity passes before he reaches out to wipe the tear caught in my lashes. I close my eyes to his touch, scared of how much I wanted it.

“Y/N,” my name is a breath on his lips and it makes my heart stutter. My eyes open in slow motion, seeing him so vulnerable right in front of me, and suddenly things speed up and we’re reaching for each other; two waves crashing until they become one.

***

I don’t know how much time had passed in minutes, Adam and Regan are still out but Harry and I had fallen together and crashed apart so many times that I’m dizzy with it.

“You’re wonderful,” he says as we face each other, our noses just nearly touching. He trails a finger down my cheek. “Just...incredible.”

I feel the flush spread through me, “Great vocab Styles. We’re really using the big words.”

“Words are sort of hard right now,” he grins. “My brain’s all mush.”

I laugh, “Not much different to its usual state!”

“I knew you were going to say that!” he tries to reach for me but I skip off the bed with a laugh. “Come back.”

“I have to pee,” I slip on pants and can’t stop grinning the whole time I’m away. When I come back in, the blissful smile on his face tells me everything I need to know. I climb over him but he stops me in place, a knee on either side of his hips.

“I’m happiest when I’m with you Y/N,” he says, his voice roughened with emotion. “I think I always was. Younger Harry liked to self-sabotage.”

I bend down and my hair slips around us. The way he looks at me makes my insides mush. And even though I have proof of why I shouldn’t trust him, he’s here. In my bed. Miles away from where he would be if he hadn’t traveled all this way to see me. And that means something.

“I’m glad you’ve done some growing,” I say to him quietly.

“I had to,” he says softly. “I couldn’t have you like I do now if I hadn’t.”

“I guess we’ve both grown,” I brush a curl from his forehead.

“I know, old Y/N would have punched me if I showed up unexpectedly.”

“Rightly so,” I grin. He smiles back, brushing my hair behind my ear, back over my shoulder. He props himself on his elbow to kiss the shoulder he’d bared. It’s simple, and sweet, but it’s enough to unravel me all over again. And he knows it.

“When does Regan get home?”

“We might have another half hour,” I grin.

“Let’s not waste it,” he mumbles into my skin.

I agree.

[wearebothdrunk]

Omygod i just finished watching starwars and i kinda have an idea like maybe a jedireader? Or a jedi-like-reader where theyre in madripoor right, then they got attacked and she like "hold up let me handle it" AND SHE PULLED OUT HER LIGTHSABERS 😭😭 sam (and maybe zemo) geek out and bucky was like "i am so confused but that shits amazing"

Hi! of course!

“ A friend from work ”

pairing: Bucky x fem!reader (stark)

Word counting: 2186

Summary: You basicaly save Sam´s and Bucky´s ass in Madripoor. 

warnings: nightmares

a/n: I had to do some changes to your requests to be more Marvel so i hope you like it anyway! I love the request.

Masterlist

*gif not mine*

Since your father died you have been supporting your mother Pepper and your younger sister Morgan. Pepper was not your biological mother but she always took care of you, even before she and your father started dating.

Without your dad and Nat and Steve, the Avengers seemed more lost than ever. You still helped and were Sam's backup on his missions but it wasn't the same. Your whole family had fallen apart, Thor was with the guardians of the galaxy, Clint retired, Bruce had enough with the avengers, and Wanda was taking some time for herself. You were left with Sam and Bucky. You were pretty good friends with Sam, but with Bucky...... let's just say it's complicated. You liked him for a while, but you didn't want to put your father in an uncomfortable situation, so you always put him first, even if it was very hard sometimes.

One day you were just relaxing on the couch when you looked at the tv and saw the news report saying that the criminal Zemo had escaped from prison. You immediately called Sam.

"Pick up Sam, come on-" you said.

you heard a voice on the other side " y/n? is everything okay?" you heard Sam´s voice

"No! Zemo has escaped from prison in case you haven't heard the news!"

" Really?!" he said but not very convincingly

You started to get suspicious. He seemed to already know about what was happening, but if he knew, why didn't he tell you? unless.....

"You're with him, aren't you?" you said straight out. "no, no, no, why would you think that y/n?" he was really trying to convince you

"Why did you do that Sam?! you know it's dangerous, what the hell were you thinking?"

" relax y/n. me and Bucky need him for a mission, he is just a means to an end" he finally said

"Are you with Bucky?" you asked. You missed him even if he was just a friend, he was special to you.

"Yes, but he is fine, don't worry! I have to go now! Goodbye, take care y/n"

he hung up.

Sam knew about your little crush on Bucky. He was like a best friend to you and if you couldn't count on his advice, then you wouldn't count on anyone.

Like your father you always wanted to help the Avengers in any way you could, so obviously you wouldn't be left out of this mission. In one of the upgrades you made to Sam's suit you added a tracker device in case he was kidnapped. It was the perfect time to use it! You pulled up a chair, sat down, and began tinkering with the gadgets your father had previously bought and used. You wanted him to be here with you but unfortunately, that was impossible so keeping his legacy alive was the closest you could get.

"Yes, found you!" You shouted in joy

"What city is this? Ma... Madripoor?" you asked yourself

"Well I hope it's worth it Sam Wilson because otherwise I'm gonna kick your ass"

You called Happy to get a flight for you. It was hard to convince him but you managed to convince him by saying you needed a short vacation.

* After 5 hours

You finally got to your destination, it felt like it took days to get there. Madripoor was a poor, dark and dirty city, you didn't like it there at all.

You got on your bike and headed towards the location of the suit. After about 10 minutes you arrived where Sam and Bucky were supposed to be according to your device.

"But this is just a car!" you said angrily.

Suddenly you heard gunshots and breaking glass and three unrecognizable men, at first.

"Y/N?! What the fuck are you doing here!?" Sam shouted, placing you behind a container to protect you from the bullets that were being fired at the four of you.

"Stand back!" you shouted at them, standing up.

You quickly took out the gun that was stuck inside your long leather jacket. You pointed the gun and in three seconds and without making a sound the gunshots stopped, just like magic.

"What the fuck was that? " Sam said surprised

" I am so confused but that shits amazing," bucky said with his mouth open giving a small smile.

"what are you waiting for?!! to die? get in the car now!" you shouted at them

The four of you ran quickly to the car and got in. Zemo started the car and luckily you managed to escape in time.

"what was that y/n?" sam asked

" it's just a prototype I made from a project my dad was working on before.... you know what. it works with extremely strong lasers that can demagnetize any weapon."

" That's fucking awesome!" Bucky said

you smiled. you loved being praised for your work but being praised by Bucky felt different to you.

" Well, thank you, Bucky!"

" Don't thank Bucky. I appreciate what you did back there but this is super dangerous. Your dad and Steve wouldn't approve any of this and-" you interrupted him.

"Guess what? My dad's not here! Why? Because he sacrificed his life to save the world! And Uncle Steve isn't here anymore, so stop thinking about what they would think of me!"

sam looked at you with concern. He felt obligated to protect you since your father couldn't.

For a moment the car was filled in awkward silence until Zemo decided to open his mouth.

"No one told me about a fourth member of the team. Sorry, pretty girl, but you won't be able to continue this trip with us" Zemo said.

"You are not in charge of anything, we are. If y/n hadn't appeared out of anywhere, we would be probably dead. So I advise you to keep your mouth shut and play your only role if you don't want to go to prison again" Bucky said with his eyes fixed firmly on Zemo.

Zemo swallowed.

" well, but there aren't enough beds," Zemo said in a low voice, barely audible.

" don't worry, she can sleep in my bed, I sleep on the floor," Bucky said without even blinking

You felt butterflies in your stomach. You were going to be in the same space as Bucky for more than 5 minutes, you were nervous that you would say something stupid or give him the wrong idea.

"Oh, you don't have to.

(oh yes, you do.)

" Of course I do. " Bucky looked at you with intensity as if he needed to do this.

* after 20 minutes*

"These are your rooms. All beds are already made and your bags will be taken to your respective rooms Mr. Zemo" the woman said.

"Thank you, my dear," Zemo said kissing the lady's hand

"Well, these are your rooms. I don't want anything ruined and I don't want any noise because I am very tired. Good night fellows" Zemo went directly to his room and closed the door leaving the three of you alone.

" I'm just going downstairs to see if they can get me an extra blanket," Bucky said leaving you and Sam alone. Things between you two were still a little awkward from earlier.

" y/n, I don't want us to be on bad terms. You have to understand that I care about you" Sam broke the silence

" Sam, I know and I care about you too, but you have to realize that we are almost the same age and I don't need to have a babysit."

"I know, I know. No hard feelings?"

"No hard feelings," you said shaking his hand and pulling him for a hug

"So, what's this about you sleeping in the same room as Bucky? y/n I'm watching you like a falcon" sam joked

"Relax! He's just a friend from work"

" I have the blanket here. I'm going to bed now, good night". Bucky said to you two

"oh, I'm going with you, that way I can help you make your bed. it's the least I can do since you don´t let me sleep on the floor"

You both said your goodbyes to sam and went to your room.

Bucky spread out a blanket next to the bed where you were going to stay and laid down.

"You´re not gonna even put a pillow? Take this one I have too many." you said to him

"No! I don't want a pillow" Bucky said, throwing you the pillow again.

You got up and started to make his "bed" more comfortable. "You're not going to sleep on the floor like that, Buck-" he interrupted what you were doing by grabbing your arm and looking you straight in the eye. "I don't need that y/n. I'm used to sleeping on the floor."

You looked at him shocked. "You are used to it?!"

"Yes," he said hesitantly.

"Why Bucky?" you asked.

"  I don't feel comfortable enough to sleep in a fluffy comfortable bed, not after all the people I have killed and all the lives I ruined. Every night I have nightmares to remind me of that" he said as if it was something natural to him.

" Buck....... You can't feel that way. You deserve a hundred soft, comfortable beds, you deserve to have a happy life. You didn't kill those people, you didn't ruin those people's lives, HYDRA did. There are people who care about you, I care about you."

"You care about me? You said yourself that I was just a friend from work, and I understand and respect that y/n, I knew we were just that."

"That was me joking with Sam. I wish you were just a work friend, it would have saved me some heartbreaks."

" heartbreaks?" you could see by Bucky´s confused face that he had zero idea of what you were talking about.

" are you going to tell me that you never noticed that I liked you and cared differently about you?"

" NO!" he said surprised

"Okay, I understand. We can still be work friends Buck I mean it, I don't want to put you into another bad situation-" the touch of his lips against yours interrupted your speech.

"I never wanted to be just your friend from work" he sighed.

"me neither," you said kissing him again

You make out for about 5 minutes. when you finally let each other out of your arms, you got up and took the blanket that was on your bed and your pillow and put it next to Bucky. "what are you doing?" he looked confused.

"Did you really thought I was going to let you sleep alone on this cold uncomfortable floor?"

"y/n-" you interrupted him with a kiss. "Yes?" you asked. "I don't want you to sleep here on this horrible floor. you will go back to your warm comfortable bed and sleep" he said with a straight face

"Bucky, either you come with me to this warm bed or I will sleep here with you. it's your call baby"

he smiled and sighed. " you are the worst" he mumbled throwing you on the bed making you giggle. You walked over to him and grabbed his hand and kissed it.

"I promise you that you deserve all of this Buck" you whispered.

he kissed you again passionately to thank you for what you had done for him. You both laid down. You put your head on top of his chest and he put his arms on top of your back, you were finally able to sleep.

* later that night*

you began to hear a voice whispering something making you wake up.

"I HAVE TO, I HAVE TO DO THIS" Bucky sighed in the middle of sleeping.

Bucky was having a nightmare. He was sweating and he was gasping for breath.

"Buck? babe, it's just a nightmare" you whispered caressing his cheeks with the back of your fingers.

Suddenly he gets up, still heavy breathing, and sits in the bed.

" What's happening," he said in mid-breath. "You were having a nightmare babe.". You put your arms around him making him feel safe." it's okay" you said.

When he finally let go you stood up and start walking toward the door

"where are you going?" He asked with a puppy face

" don't worry, I'm just gonna get something to calm you down"

when you came back with the hot chamomile tea you had made for him, Bucky was still sitting on the bed with his hands on his head.

" here, this is going to help you. my dad always made me this when I woke up in the middle of the night"

" thank you for taking care of me," he said

" James Buchan Barnes I will be here to make sure you sleep like a baby for the rest of your life."

and he did.

[nikkywrites]

The Superhero Next Door // Part One

Summary: Starla moves in with her sister. Things get better. Then she notices her new neighbor and not in a good way.

Based off this prompt/idea by @caffeinewitchcraft

This one has been reworked a bit. Still the same story though, just fixed how Starla notices Duke, basically. That’s the biggest change.

*****

"That would be a literal blessing," her sister says, sighing into the phone with hope that pierces through the static of low reception.

"Well," Starla sighs, hand on her hip, looking at the stacked boxes in her apartment, artfully ignoring the eviction notice laying on the kitchen counter. "I kind of don't have a place to live past Thursday, so I don't have much of a choice."

"Well, you're always welcome to come take the guest room."

Starla rubs the bridge of her nose. "I can't afford any rent, though."

"You don't need to pay rent, " Melissa insists, words garbled by the piercing sound of a crying baby. There's some rustling, sound muffled as she deals with the crying newborn. "You're my sister,” she continues, voice softer as she soothes the baby, practically cooing. "It's no problem and you'd be doing me a huge favor anyways, with the kids."

"Okay," Starla says, nodding to herself, like she has options and a choice. "Let's do it."

So she moves in.

It’s what’s best for both them, what with Starla’s apartment block being torn down to place a strip mall, and with Melissa having two new babies that she was raising solo. This was better for both of them, and it would help restore their bond that had been neglected since they had both reached adulthood and thrown themselves into work and romance.

This was good.

Starla moves in easily, happy to be closer to her sister and niece and nephew, but missing the busyness of city life.

She’s a babysitter now. Glorified, with her lack of rent, and definitely overpaid, but still a babysitter.

It’s exhausting, so maybe not so much overpaid or glorified. Maybe she had underestimated the amount of work and attention two babies took.

Watching one baby is difficult, but two? It’s the only thing that fills her day, and it does a fantastic job of doing so. It takes time, and after only a few days, she’s become adept at holding them both at once and caring for both of their needs.

She’s becoming a good aunt, she thinks. A solid second parent to the tiny babies who will never meet the man tied to them by blood. It’s hard, but she loves them and that makes it worth it.

It doesn’t take long for her to familiarize herself with the neighbors. 

Casey from down the block walks her two Shepherd mixes twice a day every day. Mat from across the street brings his sons to the park three days a week. Leslie jogs at six in the morning before work. Jake brought her a welcoming tin of muffins when he noticed that she’d moved in, a joint gift from him and his wife. Kay from the end of the road hosts a weekly hang out that she kindly sent her an invitation to alongside a welcome note.

None of them are who catches her attention, though. It’s Duke, who is her new direct neighbor who catches her eye. She’s never bumped into him or anything, but she’s acutely aware of his existence.

She’s-- she doesn’t mean to spy, but she’s sure that he’s no normal neighbor.

She’s fairly convinced that he’s a Super, actually.

No one in the neighborhood suspects, no idle gossip whispered when she questioned about the new neighbor who hasn’t bothered (or noticed) that someone new has moved into the house next door. He’s fairly secluded among everyone.

He doesn’t go to Kay’s hangouts. He’s just home to sleep, everyone says. He’s not a social guy. He does, though, travel into the city pretty often for hours at a time. Some of it is on a schedule.

Some of it is not.

Starla has... perhaps checked the news when he does, to see how often it lines up with city Super sightings, but it doesn’t enough for obvious eyebrows to be raised. But she knows that Supers don’t always go out in suits when they’re working, so it’s an iffy measurement from the start.

It doesn’t damn or clear him.

Not much would. But she’d find what she had to. If he was low-level, she’d be fine with it. It was the high tiers who couldn’t escape from their work. Who’s work followed them after they shrugged off the suit and the mask and the name.

It was fine if he wasn’t dangerous. She wasn’t planning on outing him. She just needed to know if he was safe.

After she learned that, she’d leave him be.

It’s his fault for being obvious. He comes home bruised and battered from an office job. He has odd hours. He’s left for the city at night a time or two, speeding out of his driveway in a hurry. No one has ever been in his house. No one has said anything more then hello or good morning to him. He was a ghost. A picture of what it looked like when someone was trying to be invisible.

It was suspicious. It had her gut rolling in unease.

Scones are how she decides to start. it’s polite to bake goods for neighbors and scones are bland enough he probably won’t hate them. It’ll open the door of her getting closer.

The twins are napping when she gets the chance to start throwing the batch together. She hopes they sleep for the hour or so it’ll take for her to throw it in the oven because she’s starting it from scratch. They don’t, of course, or more specifically, Cassie doesn’t.

She abandons the bowl of unmixed powders with liquid poured over the top like a faulty volcano to scoop up the crying baby.  “Hey baby,” she coos, swiping a finger over a soft, velvet cheek as she bounces softly. “Whatcha crying for, huh?”

She settles fairly quickly, her large eyes drifting down. Carefully, Starla sets her back into the rocker and returns to baking, sacrificing time for silence. 

They sleep through the rest of mixing and shaping into triangle-esque blobs. It’s after she sets the timer that they wake again, and she’s quick to go over and give them another feeding, and a diaper change for Benjamin.

Caring for them both had seemed impossible, at the beginning, but now it was as easy as breathing.

Her life is turning around, rising from the bland routine it had fallen into. A brightening comet that lights her night sky.

Things were much less stressful now. She enjoyed her day to day, which she didn’t before. She’d loved the city, but it hadn’t been kind to her and the eviction notice was just the straw that broke her. That sent her away. The suburbs were nice, too, though, and she was close enough to the city to be satisfied.

It was safer, too.

Or, it was statistically. She’d never suspected her apartment floormates or coworkers to be Supers. Now she was determined her neighbor was one. Now she was worried about it.

Back at her apartment, a ripped-up street was just another Thursday. Rubble blocking a road was normal. It hadn’t disturbed her too much. Life was boring.

It wasn’t now. And not just because of the twins. She had a mystery, too.

She likes mysteries. Puzzles and games and books. She likes to guess who the villain is, in thriller stories and in mystery books. She guesses right sometimes and she doesn’t on others, but she likes attempting. At trying to slot together all the little clues and dissecting the truth from a heap of mostly inconsequential evidence.

As a kid, she’d wanted to be a police officer. Her dad had watched a lot of crime shows and she’d liked watching them fit pieces together to bring justice. It looked fun, when it was on TV.

Then she grew up. She learned that police work was a lot more boring and restricting than the shows made it out to be. Cops were just second-rate overlooked heroes. They got all the paperwork. None of the glory. They did the stakeouts and the waiting. All of the parts that were a slog. Heroes got the benefits. Her fire had been snuffed out. but she still loved the idea of it.

She still likes solving mysteries. And even if she didn’t-- she doesn’t like the idea of someone dangerous living next to her family. 

What if a fight followed him home and a Super battle broke out? If Supers started fighting that close, there would be nothing she could do.

It was best she figured out what kind of Super her new neighbor was . If she was lucky, he was just a nonpowered, try hard vigilante. Which was kind of illegal, but not particularly dangerous. But that was if she was lucky. If she was unlucky, then they were in danger just because of their proximity to him.

Living in the city, she’d seen too many new reports of mangled office buildings, smoking apartment buildings, has seen too much of the wreckage fighting leaves behind on the streets and the buildings and the people. It had so much impact on people. It was a very destructive thing to happen.

There was a reason why most of city budget goes to upkeep and repair. Super battles break everything and because they’re doing good, they don’t face punishment.

Starla is pretty indifferent to Supers. She knows that they’re expensive and destructive. They’re good too. Now she just doesn’t want that near her sister and the babies.

She was going to figure out just how much danger they were in. Exactly how much.

She was going to figure out Duke’s secret identity.

*****

Done! This one was a struggle to do for some reason. I think it’s a tad better now, though.