#guess we will see what happens
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#time 4 venting in the tags so.#i just fucking dont wanna be alive rn#fucking hate my body so much#wanted to cut yesterday n today#and i feel like i should just fucking kill myself or some shit cause like#im turning 22 and ive done fucking nothing and i cant be myself and i have to fucking talk to my abuser often ishbc of the sitation i am in#and i just dont wanna fucking do this anymore#i dont even know#i feel stupid for saying this#ive got fuck all problems relatively but im being stupid and wanna kms bc of them#whatever#guess we will see what happens
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time for skeleman
with the lack of any other info yet, all I can focus on are those Charles Lloyd-looking sunglasses. they are absolutely sending me. I feel like we're gonna fall through a tree or whatever and this stitched-up boney gentleman is gonna pop out from behind a gravestone and start serenading us with some smooth jazz on the saxophone.
or should I say...the saxoBONE???????
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#doot#i drew this so fast i'm so sorry#god. we don't even have an event name yet what do i tag this with.#the only thing we know about him so far are 1) glasses#2) ~*wagahai*~#(is wagahai a jack thing because that's incredible)#(hold on i gotta look up the japanese dub)#i have zoomed in and i THINK he's got orange eyes but the pixels are defeating me#anyway excuse me for a moment while i vibrate so intensely that i start phasing through the floor#nightmare event is nigh!!!!#this is the number 1 event i have wanted most i can't believe it's real and it's actually happening#i've been dreaming of halloweentown boys for forever i am SO excited#slightly bummed it looks like there's not going to be a sally too but we can't have everything i guess#(unless...? 👀)#stream on the 29th let's GO#and for once it's not at like 4 AM my time thank you for small mercies twst#i wanna see my guys in fancy halloween suits!!!!
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Hi!! Your Cherik is so good and gorgeous 🤩🤩 If you don't mind wanna try to draw some Fall of X Cherik please?
thank you so much !!
i have a couple of ideas relating to the fall of x period specifically since theres. A Lot i wanna play with, so i hope this lil thing may be a satisfactory start :]]
and the obligatory bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#fall of x#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#professor x#magneto#snap sketches#for clarity on of this tag ramble im calling magneto max OK ok#sorry it took me a while to answer- ive been busy this week !#but yah like i said theres a lot of Fall Of X moments i wanna poke at#one i really wanted to doodle around was max's time with the shadow king from Resurrection of Magneto#the third issue is prob my fave in general if im so tbh .... but i wont prattle bout that ill go back to my previous prattle#i dont think i have a comic in mind prob just a doodle with shadow charles....#i mean if im devious enough i can def turn it into a comic but for now i just know i wanna do something with that#honestly even this moment i might revisit when i have more time to draw something. a lil better#i dont hate this its a sound start- but i THINK i wanna draw a smooch. a lil kiss. idk we'll see#cause im cheeky like that. 'will this be the last time i see you' 'girl idk we can kiss about it though' etc etc#god not to get off topic but im so curious what will happen with these two ... but thats for a diff post i guess#honestly if you guys have any runs i should read lemme know !! i just finished way of x and bar that ive just been reading the 60s issues#i have a couple on my list i wanna check out but im always excited to look into recs if yall think theyre worth it !!#but ya. thats all from me for now#my time is so finite this week i hope i can draw these sillies again soon .. i have a lot of ideas i fear#maybe i can sneak in one more doodle tonight ... <- doubtful
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I, for one, am looking forward to Viking Piece.
#one piece#elbaf#elbaph#not really spoilers we're not there yet#monkey d. luffy#nami#usopp#listen... I'm Norse... I really wanna see what Oda makes of our culture#he already thinks semlas are delicious so I can't wait to see what else he gets wrong#YES THIS IS MY ANTI-SEMLA PROPAGANDA#they're nasty (do I still eat one every year for national semla day? I do)#('wait you guys have a national semla day?' you say. indeed we do)#ANYWAY ELBAF#guess it's finally happening!!#Oda has literally teased this arc SINCE I WAS A KID#and I'm in my early 30s now
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i'm sorry but hotd positing that all women are innately cautious and peaceful and compassionate while men are rash warmongers is not a feminist win! i could see the value in everyone being hesitant to go to war at the onset of the story because it intensifies the tragedy of this house tearing itself apart, but at this stage, rhaenyra has as much reason for bloodlust (if not more) as the men on the show. it's pretty heavily implied that the shock of her usurpation killed her daughter, aemond killed lucerys, and one of aegon's kingsguard snuck into her quarters with the intent to assassinate her. most importantly, she has felt entitled to the throne since she was named heir as a child. she should be incensed! rhaenyra's inaction in the season 1 finale due to a sudden aversion to violence was already stretching believability -- this is the same woman who expressed nothing beyond mild shock at vaemond's beheading, who plotted with daemon to have an innocent man killed to facilitate laenor's escape while declaring that the realm should fear her. to have rhaenyra insist on peace at this point in the story, when war is already well underway, is incredibly irrational.
this problem is not limited to rhaenyra. alicent ordered larys to kill mysaria's network of spies and any suspected traitors in the red keep, presumably without any due process, and neither of these decisions was depicted with the gravity they deserved for a character who was once horrified by any bloodshed. meanwhile, aegon had a few extra ratcatchers executed, and not only was the direction sufficiently ominous, but we also got a lengthy monologue from otto about how it would spell his doom. it is probably pointless to bring up rhaenys because she is written less like a believable human being and more like a mouthpiece for the writers to assert whatever political opinion they believe is correct in a given episode -- but she did very much kill dozens if not hundreds of smallfolk last season. she did do that and very clearly did not care. why is she an advocate against war? for both alicent and rhaenys, there is a strange dissonance where their actions are at odds with their attitudes about opposing large-scale war for the good of the realm. i'm not saying this dissonance cannot exist, but it should at least be acknowledged.
helaena raising concerns about the losses suffered by the smallfolk might have worked in isolation, but for it to accompany everything above is exhausting. can none of these women be allowed to feel for themselves?
#alicent isn't so much a problem in THIS ep btw... i'm just so annoyed by the fact that they brushed over her having larys kill ppl#i encourage her to commit atrocities but i would like it to be known that she committed them#in 1.09 she ordered larys so casually that i thought s2 was going to have a bit about how larys had gotten trigger-happy w arson again#because alicent had only wanted him to take out mysaria lmao. but i guess not???? we don't even see her conflicted about it?#baela and rhaena are finally getting to speak so maybe one of them (prob balea) will fix this. a girl can dream#rhaenyra targaryen#alicent hightower#rhaenys targaryen#helaena targaryen#house of the dragon#hotd spoilers#just finished the ep... i always watch a bit later when it drops on 🏴☠️#i did promise myself to hold off on any complaints until the full season dropped but i think this is egregious regardless of what happens
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you are umasou
#I watched it today it was so good#im not big on dinosaur stuff but i like how it was used to approach the predator/prey conversation especially when both sides are sentient#instead of just defaulting to well since predators are meat eaters their actions are automatically immoral so their role in the story#has to match. and then when your characters /are/ meat eaters you just step around that whole topic#heart knows he has to kill and eat so there’s no avoiding it but even he knows he has agency over that#hell he even decided to hunt by himself so umasou doesn’t have to see him kill and eat another dinosaur a day after meeting him#and maybe its because it’s a kids movie but it also doesn’t make a big show over the act of hunting and eating. it doesn’t dwell on it#like yes you can clearly see them ripping into guts minus the graphic details but it doesnt go out of its way to censor it either#its played straight just like hearts mom having more kids like nobody asks who the father is or when that happened cuz it doesn’t matter#what matters is she still loves heart and encourages her kids to greet their big brother and they do!!! it’s sweet#Beckon was also an interesting touch bc they make it clear the only reason he doesnt eat umasou is bc he cant and not that he wouldn’t#but he’s still a funny and interesting character and that doesn’t get in the way of how we see him too much#same for baku he was pretty polite with heart esp from the start when he asks him if hes abandoned implying he would be prepared to#look out for him from the start. and at the end when he decides to spare him. I dont hate him at all hes just intimidating#you are umasou#doodles#I wanted to draw smth more detailed but I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go with the cartoony art style#or smth closer to realistic?? so this is like. some sort of compromise I guess
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Penacony.
more from the post looooop:
#okay did this one in order of plot references from start of penacony to latest info#turns out i have too many of these for one post so i cut it down to mostly plot relevance.#im scared what is gonna happen next. plz firefly don't dieeeee#also i am guessing that our next full on new location is gonna be an ipc onw#because we are getting suddenly a LOT of ipc lore and 3 whole ass members are playable#and while it was in the illusion ending im gonna guess that if sunday lives then he's gonna go on that trial still#but that secret robin mission makes me scared#my other guesses are going to be one of the 3 locations we were asked on#i really want lushaka but its likely edo star if that's how we're going about this#but I'd really like to see glamoth (i know im ranting about it again) or sigonia bc those places have really interesting history#of course i want places like punklorde but like a lead into those aren't set yet.#i also wonder about that steampunk planet penacony was originally going to be.#sooo much to thiinnkkk#honkai star rail#honkai star rail memes#hsr sparkle#hsr black swan#hsr trailblazer#hsr stelle#hsr sampo#hsr acheron#hsr aventurine#hsr topaz#hsr dr ratio#hsr gallagher#hsr robin#hsr acheswan#hsr boothill#hsr jade#hsr firefly
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Someone said this already but I’ll point it out again that Jimmy is an unreliable narrator and a manipulator that spins and alters the narrative/tone of every scene he’s in with each character.
This sentence also applies to Curly.
Too many people are taking how Jimmy talks to Curly and how Curly is actually responding at face value when between Anya and Curly he is again the second most affected by his presence. This is to say he changes how he is acting drastically when dealing with Jimmy in a more similar way Anya does than people are willing to admit.
#like idk why we just accepted that yeah Jimmy is also saying truths about curly or that curly is the only one#unaffected by Jimmy’s behavior like I also see people saying Curly is an unreliable narrator and while he has some biases his perception#of reality and acknowledgment of things that challenge his views make him completely different#like he is aware of what’s actually happening he’s just handling pretty badly like idk for people who don’t want to trust his words all the#facts you get about Anya in the game come from his friendly commentary about her and his thoughts so I guess we throw that out?#it’s just not everything is a parallel for Jimmy and curly as player characters sometimes it really is to show how#different and disingenuous Jimmy is about things as Curly is the only other perspective we get#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing
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i wonder if the reason ive been struggling w/art sm is bc my brush size has been 2 big
#ignoring the hand but like i made the brush smaller & instantly i drew smth i liked way better than like anyhthing this week#what happened ltierll huih#anwyays a kon 4 the ppl#i have some more ideas i want 2 draw on ths page but like im tired#i didnt add a lot of my kon hcs on this so if he looks diff thats yyyy#ASLO IF ANY1S SEEING THIS WHAT DO WE THINK OF THE AHIR#PLS I STRUGGLE SM W/HAIR I JUST NEED AN OPINION ASJKFGHAS#ok anwyays uhhhh do i tag this? ill b technically reuploading it l8rrrr uhhhh#i guess i wont :3
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met some new guys today
#ace attorney#what a dooozy of a case so far#i was like huh! well this is a weird change of pace considering how 3-1 was but then we finished the first trial and it was like OHHHHHH#love a good bait n switch. wasnt expecting that at all im delighted for how its going to continue from here!#im enjoying the game so far!! i dont like godot very much but im going to see what happens as the game continues i guess#also ron delite most androgynous failguy ever
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"Louis acting like a pimp to Armand" And what is a pimp exactly? Quickly. And, oh so sexual trauma survivors can't engage in kink now without it being all about that? Pet names? They can't be submissive anymore? Consensually? Sexually healthy? Be serious. I'd hardly say there's much power difference between them during all this anyway, except that Louis is freer than Armand and it's been putting a strain on their relationship. Louis wants more from Armand, and less of this 'being his past' for them both, and so helping Armand with this could fix that. It's healthy to want to help your partners get out of a rough patch?
I mean, the whole exchange was very clearly set up as a "I want to help you" after such a great moment of vulnerability Louis feels just how much Armand is desperate for it. Louis called Armand so they could work out a plan together.
And the bit with the umbrella was Louis' way of asking 'are you willing to listen to me?' and Armand said yes by unfolding it. Louis goes on and explains, Armand is allowed to argue against it, but Louis makes his point. And then he gives Armand a way to make his own choice in it too. Armand's already decided 'I want you, more than anything else in the world', but Louis still asks after if he's sure of his choice, and with a name, Arun, that is the one of his fullest agency, running the point home. Honoring the situation Armand calls Louis Maitre - as a way of being like 'I'll do as you've said then'. To make this work he's going to have to give Louis some of the control, yes. But it's the first time such a role is ever established, and it was his choice to do it. So so what if they do it in a very suggestive way? They can't like doing that? I think it's them having fun.
I struggle to find how Louis is being overly domineering here when really he's giving and offering Armand the most agency he's ever had. Same with finding it manipulative. The manipulation was more earlier in the episode I think, when he was stringing him along, giving mixed signals. He's no longer toying with him like that. Louis might be pushing Armand, leading him on to make a decision, but he doesn't mean bad by it.
But back to this pimp thing. I find it frankly offensive that this is where people are going with this. I get it, but to run with it being the case is, on many levels, wrong.
Louis told us episode 1 this was the only sustainable line of work to support his family and keep their standing, at the time. It was never his choice to be doing this either but his blackness allowed no other options. He did what he did so his family could stay in that house and maintain all their same comforts. It gave him privileges most black men didn't have at the time that he wanted to maintain and even have more of. Anyway, it doesn't and had never defined him the way 'being good at running things' had. And in that case he just likes having that kind of control where he can get it, which makes sense.
The world is what placed that kind of role onto him of what he was allowed to be able to run, not himself. And on that he actually treated the sex workers he employed well and respected them enough to give them more opportunity.** He recognizes they don't have much in the way of options either.
Louis employed sex workers, yes, but he didn't subject them to abuse, (like how Armand was)*. He didn't oversee things in a way that would go against their consent (see; episode 1 again)**. Sometimes a job is just a job. And Sex work is work.
Armand's particular past with sexual abuses may strike a particular cord with Louis, given all that, but the very last thing either is thinking is that Louis' pimping Armand out here. This is merely their decision as companions, and had nothing to do with adding another line in a laundry list of selling Armands body out to people at the command of someone else. Armand rescinds some of his control to Louis' wishes, because he wants him, and he trusts him, that's all.
If you aren't allowing Armand that choice, and are doubtful it's fully his, you're putting him right back in the box of being defined by his abuses. Putting him back into that space where he isn't given any agency over what he does. (Which is exactly opposite of what the intent of this scene is for)*.
*: (edit) added for clarity.
**: (strike through) numerous people are saying I'm misremembering these points so disregard it. (Thought he was siding with Bricks, it was the other way around). (Technically one aspect of those opportunities were for getting around the law). I don't have a perfect memory, it happens. Let's not get mad about it. Doesn't change much of the point which is that Louis, now, Louis then, was always considering more about the running things and for stated purposes. So I guess I'd say he may only have respected the SWers enough sometimes for what allowed him to do that, and there are moments he certainly expressed remorse over the fact, but he has a great deal higher respect for Armand that is genuine. It's incomparable. Please read my added notes in the tags, it should address most other concerns.
#amc iwtv#iwtv spoilers#iwtv season 2#Loumand#louis du pointe du lac#armand#interview with the vampire#IWTV#Many people are ranting about this but I'm throwing my hat in too#signed someone who went through csa and is close friends with many swers#long rant#noticing spelling errors in this after posting ffff#added note: I'm not saying armand and louis dynamic is without it's flaws or that louis was somehow without his exploitation and faults#while he was a pimp#as a pimp though he certainly wasn't going about it in the same way as what had happened in the brothel or with marius#I more so say that their very actions are of a healthier dynamic than that this is true even if they themselves are not exactly so#all for nuanced and messed up relationships that run everywhere in this show#But I still don't see it as that specific dynamic I wouldn't call it that there's just an amount of that dominence at play#neither want to be tethered to the roles they've been playing previously and they aren't entirely different for it but#are still arriving to this idea of needing something new to define themselves by and something they both want#they're exploring with this companionship that they're still trying to get a feel for#we as an audience might know they never do fully work their shit out and so are doomed but they don't at that point#last thing I guess is that I am not here to start shit it's fictional and not that serious 4 me 2 care enough 2 go after any1#not individually no#These are just my thoughts#I heavily caution using this idea of it being like the pimp 'jumped out' or whatever for reasons above#and its racist implications as others have said more bluntly (I've implied it)
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somehow enchanted by the detail that odo specifically gives himself (makes himself into??) a latte. he's thought about this. he has Colour Coordinated.
#(as far as I'm concerned he made the wrong choice (I'm strictly a 'coffee black as a moonless night pls' kind of person)#but that's okay he's never tasted coffee before he's got no way of knowing I guess he's just that devoted to beige haha)#star trek#star trek ds9#ds9#odo#the autism coding going on here. off the charts#odo and garak having breakfast like they said they would in the die is cast! love to see it#also the kiradax scene at the beginning of this ep uh. hello???? hello are we all seeing this???!?! what is happening here
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Do you have any final theories/desires for Book 7 Part 12?
(slamming fists on table) I DEMAND MORE CHE'NYA
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 12 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 12 spoilers#to be fair i am always in a state of lowkey wanting more che'nya#let him crash cater's pizza party!!!!#i wanna see cater skateboard up that big ol' tower to slam some za with a neon purple cat#truly this is the most radical dream yet#golly. i do try not to speculate too much but the 3-part split has me VERY intrigued#like yeah it most likely is just because hearts has a lot of boys#so it's probably cater and one of adeuce -> trey and the other adeuce -> riddle#but i am curious what's gonna happen after riddle's dream. because we'll have the party all together#and we gotta segue back into malleus somehow...#man i was wondering if the subchaptering of the subchapters was a one-off or if it was gonna be a consistent thing from here on#i guess we're gonna be getting smaller but more frequent drops from now on?#i am into that (keep up the hype!) but i'm surprised that it'll be happening just...around other events#main story has become unstuck in time and is just floating around the schedule now#we're gonna be locked in battle with cater's subconscious while deuce is over there in a parallel timeline trying on crop tops#makes me wonder what's going on in that production schedule...#lemme see those gantt charts twst
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KotOR's Sith vs SWtOR's Empire
It's rather interesting to look at the "True Sith" as described by Kreia in KotOR 2 vs the Sith Empire we got in SWtOR. Back in KotOR, the True Sith were implied to be something near cosmic horror. Beings that had been changed by the Dark Side beyond any convention of human understanding, things that could no longer be reasoned or compromised with in any fashion, and would very possibly pose a threat to all life when they returned. Granted, what we know of them from KotOR is part conjecture and most of it comes from Kreia, who is an untrustworthy source at the best of times.
Then SWtOR roles around with the Sith Empire and they are... very much not that. They are a functioning, if dystopian, society with actual values and culture. They have wants and desires, goals outside just blind slaughter and killing. Y'know, like real people. Granted, I suppose the threat to all life did carry over with Vitiate and his whole deal, but he hardly is representative of everyone in the Empire. He is just a freak like that.
This drastic change in portrayal does make sense when you look at the writing teams goals with the faction. Obsidian and Chris Avellone in particular wanted to make a major big bad for what they thought would be the upcoming KotOR 3 (may it rest in peace), and wanted that threat to be something different than the typical Star Wars fanfare. As we know however, KotOR 3 never got made and instead became SWtOR, and Bioware wanted to make it palatable to more general audiences so they copy-pasted the Galactic Empire over into the past with some minor changes.
Of course, in doing this, they could no longer follow with the original idea of the True Sith. Making an entire society innately evil and desiring to wipe out all life has some... icky implications. So instead we got the Sith Empire, a still terrible and evil state, but one that is an actual society. The True Sith of KotOR were just made into one man, Vitiate, and everyone else in the empire is a mostly normal person, or as close as they can be to being normal.
While I would have loved to see the original vision of the True Sith, I can't help but believe the Sith Empire is the better than what we would've gotten. Vitiate, being honest, sucks as an antagonist. He's boring, uninspired, and lacks the charisma that made Palpatine fun. He got a bit better in Knights of the Fallen Empire, but still was overall underwhelming. I can't imagine something where legions of people like him are the main antagonist. The conflict would probably be reminiscent of the Fate of the Jedi books once Abeloth got introduced. Boring, impersonal, and just tedious to get through.
Granted, a villain like that can be done well, as exemplified by KotOR 2's own Darth Nihilus. He works because he is completely void. Nihilus' discerning feature is his lack of personality, being subsumed into his own hunger. Power has destroyed and reduced him, but even in such a state, you can make out the faint outline of the man he once was. His last shred of humanity showing through when he spared Visas Marr. A twisted sense of compassion, but compassion nonetheless. He is tragic, but still thoroughly inhuman and evil. The problem would arise in trying to make legions of characters like this. It would wear thin fast.
Side tangent aside, I really love the Sith Empire we got. It is, as of now, maybe the most complex view we have gotten of the Sith outside of books. They are still thoroughly evil, but it gives some insight into what made them into that. Whether it be trauma, ambition, grief, or even a sense of duty, the Sith have actual motivations besides kill and rule. It demonstrates that at their core, they are still people, not just evil caricatures.
This got longer than I expected, sorry about that. Just have a lot of thoughts about these fellas.
#It would have been interesting to see Kotor III and what they would have done with it#I guess we kinda can with Mass Effect lmao#still#I don't really see how they could have resolved all the plot threads in a manner that would have been satisfying#Who would the player character be?#what would have happened to the Exile and Revan?#It probably would have gotten the Return of the Jedi treatment#that being the one most people skip over when talking about the series#star wars the old republic#swtor#kotor#kotor ii#kotor 2#kreia#abeloth#sith#sith empire#darth nihilus#valkorion#knights of the old republic
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ok this is a controversial opinion but like….. to me, henry spencer was actually not a shit father….. hear me out.
i understand that there’s a lot of subtleties that go into emotionally abusive parents, and i’m not trying to dismiss that, but honestly i just don’t see all the negativity that gets associated with him so often. also, between henry and madeleine, one parent actually seemed to be there when shawn was growing up, and it wasn’t his mother.
let’s look at shawn’s childhood. in all the flashbacks, henry was the one who volunteered at shawn’s school, who took him to movies and was around for all of his new hobbies and interests. he was the one making sure shawn did his homework and hung out with his friends and learned life lessons. granted, some of his teaching methods were not appropriate for a kid shawn’s age, so yes i can see where the criticisms come in and i agree with them. but he was so much more than his mistakes, he was the parent who cared.
when shawn grows up, yes there’s animosity between him and his father but to be quite honest, i’ve never met one person who doesn’t have unresolved daddy issues so that in itself doesn’t condemn henry in my mind. we see how much henry saved from shawn’s childhood and how much he remembers, and to me he actually does quite a bit to help shawn when he needs it. this is particularly telling in comparison to madeleine, who isn’t there to begin with and eventually we find out she really did leave her kid behind, and to me that does a lot more damage than any one thing henry did.
shawn and henry have issues, i won’t argue with that. but i really don’t think henry gets enough credit for the good he did and the way he tried when shawn got older. above all else, he was there and he was there for shawn, and that’s important. god knows it’s not everything, but it’s something.
#pls don’t send me hate#this is coming from someone who’s mother also isn’t there LMAO#like idk man henry gets so much hate but is it really deserved?#i’m not trying to dismiss shawn’s trauma with his dad i promise#it’s just everything i see online that makes it seem like more happened than it actually did#do you get what i’m saying#maybe i’m watching through the wrong lens idk#i’m talking about based on what we see in childhood flashbacks btw#there could easily be more to it we don’t know about#and it is within shawn’s right not to forgive his father#but it’s not his attitude that bothers me (at all) it’s the internet#psych#henry spencer#shawn spencer#madeleine spencer#just realized i wrote this on father’s day#happy father’s day i guess lmao#em saying things
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The last thing I'll say, and I'm saying it because it applies broadly- is that there is very rarely a perfect victim OR evil mastermind and everyone needs to get better at recognizing and responding to that fact. Victims of legitimate crimes or horrible acts can be aggressive, or bitter, or biased or a dozen things that make them 'unappealing' to listen too. They can have willfully exposed themselves to content or been in circles they really shouldn't have. They could have been given warning signs that they missed or outright ignored. They might exaggerate or misremember their claims. That does not mean they are no longer victims. If you completely missed the red flags and were taken advantage of- you were still taken advantage of. If you exposed yourself to harmful content that was upsetting or distressing, you were ultimately still exposed to harmful content. Maybe it is "your fault" for being there, but you were still there and it still happened. Especially in terms of online, its just shockingly very easy to end up in places where you are in danger of harm- and its shockingly easy to not notice that you may have put yourself in that position until its too late. If you want to be supportive of victims, you need to recognize that very often victims did things that were inappropriate themselves, put themselves in harmful situations, didn't back out when they should have, missed "obvious" signs... and are still a victim in the end. Likewise, abuse ranges from the intentional to the neglectful. Sometimes an abuser can even do both at once. People do harmful things completely on accident- even repeatedly. It can be mental illness or stress, it can be a dozen things- but yes sometimes people have patterns of behavior that are harmful and destructive that they either aren't aware of, in denial of, or don't get how bad they are about it. That does not erase the harm those behaviors cause. If you handle a situation poorly, it could just be that you handled it poorly- you didn't think through your actions or their implications. But from the receiving end, it doesn't matter how accidental it was, its going to often read as intentional, or a pattern, or whatever. And ultimately the harm is still done regardless of what it was. There is a world of difference between harm done intentionally and harm done through stupidity, neglect, or plain old mistake- but it not always easy to identify which is which- and harm is still done in the end. Sometimes people are harmed because someone saw an opportunity to do so, and sometimes they're harmed because no one stopped to question if it was even a risk. Both of those still ultimately result in someone getting hurt. The point of this is that if you are ever going to analyze situations critically you can not be looking for just "the good one" and "the bad one". You can't just weigh initial impressions on a scale and hope one side tips further and call it a day. Believing victims doesn't mean you need to throw caution to the wind, but likewise bad actors or misinformation doesn't mean your reaction should be that there couldn't possibly be victims. Be very mindful of how you interact in situations where someone was potentially hurt. Being 'critical' can easily boil over into disregard for harm- both the harm the involved might have done to each other and the harm you yourself do in how you respond to it.
#t.extpost#drama#i guess.#sorry i dont really want to talk to much about drama but#it was rubbing on me to see people act like whichever side they decided was in the right meant nothing bad ever happened to the other#sometimes everyone fucks up and everyone gets hurt in different ways!#even in situations where there IS a victim and clear undeniable abuser there is sometimes going to be victims who just look like the asshol#and theyre still going to have been the one hurt#and actual real abusers will use that to their advantage by going hey look at what an ass they are#othertimes people will be manipulative and awful and its mental illness and not evil. it doesn't erase the harm they cause through their#manipulation or by how they act but it does mean they didnt have a four year plan on how to ruin someones life#and probably shouldnt be treated or assumed as such. even if never forgiven for how they acted#looking only for evil masterminds also gives people an outlet to brush off the real issues with their behaviors#tdlr theres no easy answers to how to deal with these kind of things but we also cant pretend like the only thing we can do#is to pretend like theres never problematic people who are actively dangerous in their communities
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