#great minds think alike etc <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[itsjaywalkers]

laurie I am so glad u said u don’t see james & barty getting along bc to me this is them

ROSE I ADORE U SO VERY MUCH AND I'M KISSING U ON THE MOUTH this is so them i'm actually crying like yes !!! you get it !!! there's no world in which they'd get along, they're forever enemies and that's what makes their dynamic so fun . to me

[honeytama]

Make Your Move - Chapter 6

Noah Sebastian x Reader x Matt Dierkes

A/N: She’s back! A little thing; a minimal scene in this chapter may seem similar to a sound deck scene in Unveiled Hearts by @thefallennightmare. I noticed it after I read her story (which I love), but I chose not to rewrite my scene. No copying here, just great minds thinking alike <3

Fic Summary: Find in Fic Masterlist

Content and Warnings for Ch. 6: Lots of fluff and more dating! AHH, some suggestive content, some smut 18+, hands stuff (hand job/fingering etc), almost caught, semi-public

Word Count: 8k

Tag List:

@xxkittenkissesxx @exitwoundsx @jilliemiw86 @abiomens @lma1986

@flowery-mess @doomhands-jr @rain-down-on-me @justdamnpeachy @thatchickwiththecamera @narcissisticbehavior81

@xcllnt @somebodyels3

After Noah and you had your late-night tryst in the showers of the venue, the walk back to the bus felt desolate. You walked alone through the hallways and into the dark, humid night as you exited the venue into its back alleyway.

The grin on your face wanted to stay there; you wanted to be elated that both of the men that you were attracted to wanted you. However, your face falls when you realize that Matt was right: you’re not being fully truthful to him, or Noah.

You feel it’s hard to swallow when you think back to just ten minutes ago. Noah asked what you wanted to speak to him about and you dodged the question. Wanting to believe that your brain was foggy from the sight of Noah’s body, and that kiss, was half of your reasoning for lying, but the other half is that you really couldn’t bear telling Noah the truth.

Outside of the bus, you pace the side of it while listing the options available to you: don’t tell the two men that you kissed both of them the same night and risk their friendship and your relationship with them once they find out, or do tell them and risk it all anyway.

Everything about the situation made you feel gross and at a loss. If only you told Noah about Matt’s confession, then maybe you wouldn’t feel like you’re on track to manipulating them both in the process.

“Why?” You yell out into the night, holding your head in your hands.

You calm your senses and walk to hop onto the bus to head to Nashville, Tennessee. While in bed, you finally decide you should come clean to both of them as soon as possible to save you the heartache. In contrast to your decision, you thought, why not indulge yourself in the fantasy you had never thought possible?

—

A constant buzzing tone from your phone wakes you in the morning; you turn over in your bunk to grab it while noticing the bus isn’t moving. You must be outside of the Nashville venue already.

Without checking the caller ID, you hold the phone close to your ear and mumble, “Hello?”

“Good morning, loser, get out of bed,” Matt's voice is loud in your ear. You pull your phone away from your head and wipe the sleep from your eyes before responding.

“You’re such a bully, let me sleep,” you whine and check the time. Ten AM. It’s a bit later than when you would usually wake up. “Where are you?”

“I’m finishing a run with Noah. I’m on my way back to the venue, but he decided to go the extra mile,” he answers.

“Oh,” you’re lucky the fact that you just woke up can hide the lack of enthusiasm in your voice. You hope with everything in you that they didn't share the things they did with you the night before. They could have been laughing at you. They could’ve been plotting to “dump” you. They could be planning to fire you from the tour. Clenching your eyes closed to push back these intrusive thoughts you finally respond, “Sounds fun.”

“Yeah, it was,” he says, unfazed by your tone. “Anyway, I called because I was wondering if you had plans at, let’s say, noon?”

“Yes, I plan to rot in bed with my phone six inches from my face until they need us to work later,” you explain, matter-of-factly.

“So you’re saying you wouldn't want to go out on a date with me?”

This shocks you awake and you sit up on your bunk. The crown of your head bumps the top of the enclosed space, “Ouch, fuck!”

Matt laughs over the phone, but questions, “You good?”

“Yeah, I just banged my head on the top of my bunk.” You rub the throbbing spot on your head as you return to reality, “You’re asking me out?”

“Yup,” he pops the “P” in the word. Even though he isn’t there with you, you can just see the smug look on his face. “There’s a hot chicken place I’ve been wanting to try since we’re in Nashville and I thought I should finally take you out. You know, just you and me, like we said.”

You never thought that this day would come, but you remember your decision to be open and honest with the two boys. This would be the first time you addressed the elephant in the room, “Does it still bother you that I went out with Noah a few days ago?”

He hums softly. “I’m getting over it. I did give you two permission,” he says. “But, I figured, since I told you how I felt last night… and our kiss,” he pauses again, “you would want to start hanging out with me, too. Just not as friends.”

You bite your lip and sway in your bunk. “You want to date me,” you sing in his ear, teasingly.

“Don’t make me take it back, Y/N,” he grumbles.

“Okay, okay! Yes, I’ll go out with you,” you say quickly. “I’ll be ready at 11:45! Is it close by?”

“Sure is, we can walk there together. Wear something cute,” you can hear the smirk in his voice again.

“I will,” you sing. “Matt?”

“Hm?”

“Are you going to let me hold your hand?” You ask, hopefully.

“Maybe, if you’re good,” he laughs before hanging up the phone.

—

You’re dressed up in your favorite casual date outfit. It’s only a few minutes until you need to meet Matt outside the bus.

Adjusting your hair and accessories, you look into the bus bathroom mirror. The jitters that have shaken your body since the moment he asked out over the phone have not stopped, and really, it’s getting worse. You have to keep your jaw clenched to keep your teeth from chattering. The only thing that can help you is seeing him.

You huff and head down the hallway to the front room. Jolly and Folio sit on the couch on their phones, relaxing.

“Hey, beautiful,” Jolly says. “Where are you going?”

Folio looks up from his phone too, “Yeah? Damn, you look good, I like that outfit.”

Your cheeks flush at their compliments, but you realize you don’t feel comfortable with them knowing that you have been on a date with Noah and are now going on one with his best friend. “I’m going for lunch with Matt,” you tell them a half-truth. Lying seems to be in your repertoire these days.

“Oh, cool. Where are y’all going?” They say in unison.

“It’s a hot chicken restaurant he knows about,” you tell the truth.

“Shit, that sounds good. Could we come with y’all?” Folio asks, excitedly.

Folio, please. “I would love that, but we're going to do some catching up as friends,” you give him a sorry smile and offer to take him there another day while you’re still in town.

“It’s all good,” he shrugs. ‘Y’all have fun.”

You wave them goodbye, “See you later for the show boys.”

“Bye, Y/N!” They sing as you exit the bus onto the concrete of the venue alley.

Matt leans on the brick wall of the venue looking at his sneakers.

“Hey, handsome,” you compliment him. His outfit is different than usual. It’s not that different, however, you could tell he had his idea of a casual date outfit, too. Your chest flutters at the thought of him getting ready for you.

Matt looks up at you at the sound of your voice. A smile slowly creeps on his lips and builds to a toothy, shit-eating grin.

“I see you wore a clean, oversized tee today,” you tease him while looking him up and down. “And, camo cargo pants? That’s so hot.”

“Shut up,” he rolls his eyes. “I think that I look best without clothes, but I dont think Hattie B’s would allow that,” he jokes.

You tend to agree with that statement. He looks like a God when he is down to a pair of fitted boxer briefs. Besides the other features of his physique, below the belt, you’ve only ever taken a good look at his ass. You know that your life would be over if Matt were ever to catch you ogling his bulge, so even after countless sleepovers and pool days, you have no clue what he might be packing.

“Is that the restaurant we’re going to?” You ask as he comes to your side to start your walk.

“Mhm,” he hums. “By the way, you look,” you catch him sneaking a glance over to you, “amazing.”

“Thanks, babe,” you nudge his shoulder.

A ghost of a smile makes his lip curl upwards. He doesn't want you to notice, but you do. “I’m already regretting sharing my feelings with you,” he grunts before taking his hand in yours. His thumb rubs over the top of it softly and you smile to yourself as you walk down the city sidewalk, side by side.

—

“Can you order for me, Matt? I need to use the restroom,” you ask him.

“Yeah, I know what you like,” Matt agrees while staring up at the menu overhead at the ordering counter.

That was something that you loved about him and something you wouldn't get from Noah, not at this point. Matt remembers everything. The second you tell him you love something, your goals, even something you're just remotely interested in it’s like he has a notes app page open about it. Matt tends to order your food for you when you go out back at home, but if you order he’ll speak up for you if you’re too shy to ask for something specific.

“Could I have three chorizo breakfast tacos, please?” You would ask at your two’s favorite taco shop on Sunday mornings. Matt would give you a stare and a subtle head tilt to mention your customization, but when you don't.

“With salsa on the side. Not on top, please. She doesn't like it,” he would say for you before handing over his card.

You haven't realized it until now, looking into the bathroom mirror, but you have been comparing the two men you've been involved with and you don't like it. It’s not like you should have the privilege of comparing either of them anyway. Your choice to have one, for peace, is completely null. You could only hope to enjoy your time with the two of them until everything goes to hell.

Enough, you say to yourself roughly. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your date. You wash your hands with warm water; the temperature change and the sweet scent from the soap soothes your senses.

You walk back out into the restaurant lobby and spot Matt sitting alone at a booth. His leg bounces up and down as he looks out the building window.

Walking up to sit across from him, he jokes, “You didn’t fall in did you?”

You giggle and get settled in your seat, “No, I was just nervous, I guess. I was taking a second to myself.”

“How do you feel now?” Matt reaches across the table from you and holds his hand in yours.

“Better,” you smile. He continues tracing circles with the pad of his thumb on your hand just like he did on your way here. Just on the soft skin of your palm, this time. “So, what did you order me?”

“I got you the mild spicy sandwich with fries. I think I got us a side of mac and cheese to share,” Matt purses his lips. “I got myself the hot sandwich with fries. You can try mine, but I know you’re not too into spicy stuff,” he shrugs.

You both speak at the same time.

“Thank you–” “Unless, it’s books–

“Matt,” you squeeze his hand in yours while making “What the fuck?” eyes to him. Ducking your head, you look around the restaurant to make sure no one overheard him. “Don't talk about my book.”

“You read it in public,” he says matter of factly. “I can talk about something that you do in public.”

“Reading on the bus isn't in public,” you defend. Heat travels up your neck to your cheeks like it usually did when Matt and you got on to the topic of sex. It happens often, and you hate that you don't mind it.

He shrugs and starts to laugh at himself. “I’ve Googled the title, by the way, I know what you've been reading about, Y/N.”

You decide to play his game. After over a year of dealing with him, you have found that the best way to combat his taunting is to do it right back. “Oh, really,” you tilt your head at him. “What is it about then? Describe it to me.”

Matt lets go of your hand and adjusts his hat. This is his common tell that he would rather change the subject, but in proper Matt fashion, he wants to play with you. “If I remember correctly,” he pauses while looking up at the ceiling, “It’s about a woman who moves into the house next door to this hot guy. Hot guy is a boudoir photographer? She does his marketing in exchange for him to teach her how to fuck. I stole your copy to check for myself and I remember the guy laying her out on top of a counter—”

“Uhm, I have the mild and hot sandwiches with a side of mac and cheese?” The woman delivering your food squeaks out.

“That’s us, thank you,” Matt coughs out.

“Thank you,” you say as they start to dart away from your table.

You and him stare into each other’s eyes with blank faces waiting for the employee to walk far enough away before you can react.

Once they have walked through the swinging door to the kitchen Matt is in hysterics laughing across from you. His keeling over the side of the table just so you can see the pleasure on his face a bit closer.

“Why did you just explain my sex book in front of the employee?” You cover your face with your hands.

“You asked me to! You did this to yourself,” he continues to chuckle while shoving a fry into his mouth.

“Also, I haven't got to the part you’re talking about, so thanks for the spoiler,” you huff before also taking a fry and shoving it in your mouth. “Shit, this is good,” you moan and relax your shoulders.

“Is that how you moan when—”

“Matt, I’m on my knees—,” you glare at him before he can interrupt you. “I’m begging you, could we please talk about something else?”

“Sure,” he calms and starts eating. “I wanted to thank you for saying “yes” to coming out with me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I was nervous that you might just want to see how things go with Noah,” he admits.

“Matt, I have had the biggest crush on you since, like, a month into knowing you? There’s no way I would pass up the opportunity for a date. I just—”

“What’s wrong?”

Here we go. “I just don't want everyone to know that I’ve been on a date with Noah and you. I feel sleazy.”

“It’s going out. It’s innocent,” he shrugs and bites into his sandwich. Talking with his mouth full, “You let me know if anyone tries giving you shit for it. I’ll beat their ass.” He swallows his bite. “If it will make you feel better, I don’t mind you saying that we’re doing stuff as friends. I’ll do the same. It’s pretty normal for us to be alone since people know we've known each other for a long time.”

Thank God. “I’m glad you feel that way,” you start. “Something happened with Noah. I need to—,”

“Tell me later?” He interrupts and then shakes his head, “Sorry, I don’t want to talk about him on our date. I just want to hear about you.”

“Okay,” you nod. Fuck, don’t take the out. You need to tell him, you think. “Yeah, sorry.”

“It’s ok,” he smiles. “Here, try this sauce. Shit’s good.”

You and Matt spend the next hour at the restaurant eating and chatting away. He feeds you fries and lets you try his sandwich. Which ultimately, as he predicted, would make you chug your drink down to get another refill.

He asks you to tell him about your aspirations again as your legs are intertwined with his underneath the table. He always listens to you so intently with a furrowed brow. It’s intimidating as all you want to do is impress him. However, Matt has never made you apologize for being yourself: for liking what you like, or for dreaming big dreams.

He reminds you of his goals in life and your chest has that familiar tingle by the way his face glows when he talks about them. He shows you his favorite pictures of his dogs that you have seen time and again. He gives you countless, soft-spoken affirmations and praise about how you look, the jokes you tell him, and your work ethic. He tells you how great you’ve been doing at your job. He’s proud of you and date Matt, romantic Matt… isn’t afraid to show it.

You feel loved. He’s in love with you.

—

Matt invited you to watch the show from the sound deck again tonight.

You agreed, excitedly, the butterflies in your stomach have yet to die down after your first date with him this afternoon. The smile on his face wouldn’t dissipate either.

The crew teased about how sweet he treated them when you two came in to check up on them after returning from getting lunch.

“What’s got you so excited, Dierkes?” Kooter, Bad Omen’s drum tech, teased from behind Matt while massaging his shoulders.

“Fuck off, go help Folio,” Matt said, brushing Kooter off. His tone showed itself to be negative, however, you love the way his lips turned up at the ends as he turned back to face you. His eyes smile too as they meet yours as if to say, “You’re what I’m excited about, Y/N.”

The crew set everything up as organized and as detailed as it would be if you two were there to manage the process, and the gig began as usual.

Later in the night, you stand at Matt’s side in the sound deck to prepare for Bad Omens to begin their set of the night. It would be two whole days since you would return to work after spending some time in Nashville before moving on to the next tour stop. Looking around the room, you take it all in, to save the excitement and fulfillment that your job brings to you every night. Fans line and lean over the railings of the balcony seats at both sides of the room; chatting and patiently waiting for the band’s introduction to the stage.

A group of women, around your age, stand in front of the sound deck barrier. They're laughing and taking pictures and you hear one of them dare another to ask Matt for a photo, too. He doesn't seem to notice, but the women catch your curious stare, they nod and motion for you to tap on his shoulder. You take a step closer to him, “Matt, do you want to take a picture?” You ask while lightly tugging on the sleeve of his shirt to get his attention.

He turns to you, immediately. “Yeah,” He smiles and begins to pull his phone from his jogger’s pocket.

“Oh, sorry, not with me,” you giggle, patting his arm. “Them,” you nod your head the ladies waiting hopefully and excitedly across from you two.

“Oh, sure,” he smile falls a tad, but returns to assure you. “I’ll be right back, okay? Then there’s something I want to show you.” He steps off to the side closer to the metal barrier that separates the crowd and yourselves and you watch as the group’s faces light up at him. They cover their mouths in excitement and mouth to each to “be chill or be calm”. It’s hard to read their lips.

The way they feel right now is how you would be reacting to meeting him or Noah in an alternative universe where Matt and you had never met on that walk that one day. Every time you're invited back to the sound deck, you feel like a fan again.

Matt says, “Have fun!” to the group and returns to your side. “So, I was thinking about something cool you could do if you’re interested?”

“Sure,” you raise an eyebrow at him as he walks a couple of feet over to the lighting board on the table.

“Do you want to control the lights during the Concrete Jungle call and response thing?” He pats the console.

“What? Me?” You say, shocked, yet excited. “Hell yes, but what if I mess it up?”

“It’s super easy, not even you could mess it up,” he teases and you give him an eye roll. “I swear. All you have to do is control these two faders; up for brightening down for dimming, and you just lead the crowd to chant “Jun-gle” using the lights. You’ve seen it almost every night for the past week, you’ll be fine.”

“I’ll do it,” you nod slowly.

“Here, practice,” he grabs your hands to rest them on the correct sliders on the board. He’s soft when he guides your fingers to push the sliders upward, slowly, which gradually brightens the lights overhead the stage. Various groups of fans cheer in the crowd for the lighting, hopeful it’s a sign for their show to begin. Matt guides your fingers back down the board and the lights dim to black again. “Now, do it yourself, just faster,” he leans back on his foot and crosses his arms over his chest watching you experiment with the sliders.

“Ok,” you let out a quick breath. Your heart beats fast in your chest, but you would have time to settle your nerves as you wouldn’t have to do this until Dethrone, their final song of the night. “I think I have the hang of it.”

“Good, because that’s all you,” he says. “Sometimes I forget that you're a fan of all of this. I want you to have more of these experiences,” Matt leans in close to your ear, in hopes only you would hear him. “I know I can be an ass, but you deserve to have the time of your life on this tour. I want this to work out.”

“Yeah, I know,” you squish his cheeks with your fingers. He reels back and swats your hand away, but laughs with you before returning to his soundboard and set up. Once he’s out of earshot, you mumble, “I want all of this to work out too, believe me.”

—

You sang to yourself and danced at a volume that wouldn’t take Matt's or fans' attention from the stage as you stand with him tonight.

While you were still reeling from your day with Matt, you still missed Noah. Your heart yearned for them equally, although it is hard to forget the six words that came out of Matt’s mouth last night. “I’m in love with you, Y/N.” It has been on repeat all day.

The nights you weren’t invited into the sound deck you would stand sidestage and would get hyped up with Folio as he passed you funny looks from his drum throne. Noah would partake in the antics, too, when it wouldn’t take away from his performance. Like: Having dance-offs with you when the audience thinks he’s dancing alone, or giving you eyebrows and a smirk at certain parts of his lyrics, and when he undresses down to a tank top mid-set.

Tonight, you don’t have to hide your gaze on his hands as he lifts his overshirt above his head. The way the muscles in his back and biceps flex involuntarily by the motion makes you shutter.

It was the same feeling you felt the first time watching him live. The bass of his growls coming through the stage monitors vibrate in your chest and makes your thighs clench. Sometimes, you wonder how long he can hold his breath as he holds on to notes and screams. You imagine his tattooed hands spreading and gripping your thighs apart uneager to come up for air as he feasts on your aching cunt.

Matt can’t hear your thoughts even standing a few feet from you, but you feel like he can so you sneak cautious glances over at him when these delicious thoughts pass through your mind to he if he reacts in any way.

The show was coming up to ‘Dethrone’. Noah has nearly finished his first encore of the night and you take your place in front of the lighting board with your fingers touching lightly on the sliders Matt showed you earlier.

While waiting patiently for Noah’s cue to you, he finds your eyes in the sound deck. His dark eyes match yours directly. Surely, he can’t be looking at you? You wonder. You feel like a fan in the crowd who’s just made eye contact with their favorite band member for the first time. He nods at you, and then he begins.

“Concrete,” he growls into the mic before ticking his fore and middle fingers at you twice.

“Jungle!” You slide the light faders in tandem and they glow above the stage with each syllable the crowd screams.

Noah and you go back and forth. His eyes never leave yours, even as he paces back and forth on the stage, and he successfully directs you through his chant. The room is packed as it’s a sold-out show, but you feel as though it’s only you two present.

He tosses you a proud smile as he begins ‘Dethrone’ and it makes your legs melt.

Fuck, he’s so hot. Distracted by him, you hadn’t realized the number of times he had unintentionally made you blush and make the hairs on your neck rise. Let alone let you realize the growing need for him building up fast in your abdomen. You want any part of him, and preferably more than a kiss tonight.

You watch him perform their final song in awe; you can imagine your tongue rolling out of your mouth and drooling onto the pit floor.

—

After fans have fully exited the venue, you’re left with Matt in the sound deck with a couple of other guys from the crew.

You catch Matt yawning and he asks, “Are you sleepy yet?”

“I’ve found I have a lot of energy after each show. I’m gonna stay up for a bit,” you explain. Your lying streak made this fib too easy to tell. While you had a lot of energy, it wasn’t because of the music or the atmosphere, it was because of Noah. Impulsive thoughts appear like demonic ghouls floating around in your head whenever your sexual needs aren’t met. You wanted so badly to throw yourself at Noah the second you saw him next; to re-do your first kiss? To go even further? However, you can’t, if Matt is to be too close tonight. He was learning to be okay with you having gone on a date with Noah, but you’re unsure of his reaction if he were to find out about you doing anything more.

“I want to try to get to the showers first, but I should get all of this down so we don’t have to worry about it in the morning,” he stretches.

“Go and shower, get to bed,” you rub Matt’s shoulder with care. “I’m gonna stay here and help out.”

“M’Kay,” he yawns again. “Goodnight, Y/N. Make sure my stuff gets packed up real nicely. You’re the only one I trust.”

“Yes sir,” you give him a faux salute as he walks off toward the back of the venue. You smile at him, but your stomach lurches. He trusts you. He’s in love with you! I am being manipulative, you think guiltily.

You spend around forty-five minutes tearing down the sound deck making sure to pack Matt’s equipment, cords, wires, and laptops carefully away. You handled his things with care, even though you were half-distracted by the throbbing between your legs.

“Y/N,” a male voice calls from behind you.

It’s a crew member’s voice. Their usual lighting and production tech who helps Matt in the sound deck. “Hm?” You turn around to meet his face.

“Go ahead and wind down for the night. We’ll take care of the rest,” he nods toward the back of house. “Thanks for helping.”

“Of course, anytime. Goodnight everyone,” you set what you’re working on down and start walking toward Bad Omen’s green room with a sense of urgency.

Once inside, you grab your bag, your nighttime relaxation clothes, and the clean towel you pack in case you want to take a late-night shower. Tonight you do, but you doubt you’re going to be doing your wash routine.

Please be in here and alone. Please.

“Noah, are you in here?” You call out his name as you push open the door to the showers. The layout of the room is more like a locker room than the past showers you have used at other venues. One side of the room is lined with sizable shower stalls with floor-length curtains for privacy, while the other side of the room has a wall of lockers and benches. On them, you notice Noah’s backpack and nicely folded clothing. His boots sit together underneath the glossy, wooden bench.

“I’m in the second stall,” he talks over the sound of the steaming water raining down over him. A light mist rises over the top of his curtain and dissipates as it hits the ceiling. You can’t see him the way you could the night before.

You bite your lip anxiously. What are you doing? You ask yourself. Your body feels hot by how turned on you are and it keeps you warm as you strip yourself naked. Pulling your panties down your legs, you notice a prominent wet spot accumulated by the pool of your arousal. You stuff all of your belongings into an empty locker and softly click it closed.

His name falls from your lips before you can catch it, “Noah?”

It wasn’t in your plan for him to poke his head through the curtain, but he does. “Yeah?” His voice is innocent, but his eyes widen once he sees the sight of you. Your arms bravely stick to your sides to allow him to gain you in full. “Shit,” he hisses under his breath while making haste with the outline of your body. You watch his eyes roam you as you stand there in heavy silence before he opens the curtain a little more to invite you inside. “You’re so damn beautiful,” he says as you stand in front of him. Once you’re in the stall, you feel like his eyes will never leave yours. So, if you tried to sneak a peek anywhere but his face, he would most definitely know.

“Thank you,” your cheeks feel hot. “Is it okay if I shower with you?”

“Mhm,” he nods and hums. His low tone reverberates against the walls of the shower stall. “I was hoping you would. You have no idea the thoughts that have been running through my head since last night.”

His admission makes you feel tingly. “I hope I’m not moving too fast. This feels so out of character for me,” you shake your hands out.

“I want to move as slow or as fast as you do,” he confides to you in a low tone. His fingers reach to the crook of your neck and trace down your shoulder, to your bicep, to your forearm, and rest to intertwine with your fingers.

“You looked so good on stage tonight,” you admit as you look up at him with shining eyes. “Every night, I watch you perform, and it—,”

“And what?” Noah steps into your bubble. The tips of your breasts just barely graze his skin.

“I get so turned on,” you’re nearly talking into his clavicle. He slightly shutters as your breath hits his skin. “Noah, I’m so pent up, it hurts.”

“I can help,” he nods and his wet bangs sway. You watch the water from his hair drip onto your chest. The varying temperature makes you shiver. He notices this. “Get yourself wet first,” he instructs while switching places with you for you to stand under the running shower head.

You run your hands through your hair and close your eyes to enjoy the heat. You feel the same tickly feeling on your breasts that you always feel around him, so you open your eyes to catch his gaze from your tits when you admit, “Noah, I swear I’m already wet.”

His laugh and toothy smile make you warm inside, as much as the hot water warms your skin on the outside. He leans in close to press a kiss into your cheek, “I want to feel how wet you are, Y/N. But first, I want you to look at me. I give you permission,” his shoulders shake as he laughs at you trying your best to look at every shiny tile that lines the stall rather than his nude form.

When he backs away, your eyes trail his body. The freckles on his shoulders are the first of what you see. You reach out to touch them, but his hands come to your bare hips to push you slowly until you’re both underneath the warm, running water. The water moves in slow motion and you follow it with your eyes as it hits his chest and drips lower to his stomach. His waistline is spotted with water droplets. You take one last big breath before letting your gaze fall to his groin. He’s half hard and the tattoos around his lower stomper and thighs surround his member like he’s a work of art. Your shoulders shake a tiny bit when you chuckle at the sight of his wet leg hair and impatient toes that are dancing, waiting for you to look back up at his face.

You look up to meet Noah’s eyes, but you can’t help but sneak glances at his lips. “You’re so beautiful,” you whisper to him as you wrap your hands behind his neck and pull him down into your kiss.

He hums against your lips as if to thank you. Noah’s arms wrap around your body as you detach and reattach to his mouth in fervor. He scratches your back with his nails and grips the skin of your back. He tastes so good, so fresh. Your tongues fight each other for dominance and you win.

Noah groans when he feels your hand caress down his stomach and slowly makes its way to wrap around his half-hard cock. He feels so warm in your hand like he’s blushing down there. You open your eyes while making out with him and his cheeks are glowing pink. The sight of his dick on your small hand gives you raging confidence and makes your heart burst.

You begin to stroke him while kissing him. He grows harder in your hands and grows longer, and thicker. You move your lips and teeth and attach them to the side of his neck as he allows heavy breaths to fall from his lips. “I like the way your cock hardens in my hand,” you moan in his ear.

Noah grips your ass and it makes you pull away from his neck to whine. “I like that,” he moans. “So fucking much, you don’t even know. But, I want to help you. You can make me cum another time.”

You bite your lip and nod.

“Spread your legs, just a little bit,” he commands in a low tone. You spread your legs apart and he praises, “Yeah, just like that.”

He dips his head to your left breast and latches on, tongue first, to the nipple while kneading your other breast with his hand fingers. Water splashes off to the sides of the shower as he presses himself into you.

“Ah,” you whine when his dominant hand leaves your chest to snake between your bodies to your core. The pads of his fingers find your clit and give you a firm press before sliding through your folds, curiously.

Your dazed eyes meet Noah’s as he pulls his hand from your cunt to show you the clear, slimy juices that drool down his fingers. “I really do turn you on, huh?” He boasts before sticking his fore and middle fingers between his lips and lapping your arousal away.

“Mhm,” you moan at the sight of him licking his fingers clean.

Noah plays with your nipples with his empty hand while the right one is brought back to your pussy. “Do you remember when I heard you say my name?”

“Hm?” You’re dizzy and can’t fully think of what he’s referring to.

“The second night of the tour. The morning after, I asked you if you needed to ask me a question because I heard you say my name,” he explains while rubbing your clit in expert figure-eights. “Noah.”

Your eyes shoot open and meet his eyes, but they’re attached to your lips. “I was touching myself. Thinking about you,” you admit while whining on his fingers.

Suddenly, his fingers pinch your clit gently, but with enough force to make you cry out, “Noah.” The pain makes you shutter and collapse against his form.

“I’ve been waiting to hear my name come from your perfect lips again,” he chuckles while pinching your nipples at the same time. “Good girl. Now, tell me what you were thinking about.”

“I was thinking about, fuck,” you grind against his hand as he releases your clit to palm your cunt. “I brought my favorite sex toys with me. I was imagining you using them on me.”

“We can do whatever you want,” he speaks low into your ear before kissing your neck. His longest fingers prod your entrance and tease your pussy with quick, shallow pumps. The palm of his hand presses firmly into your clit and you grab his forearm for balance. You feel it flex under your fingers. “Do you want to cum on my fingers?”

“Yes, please, I need you—,” you squeak out.

The sound of the locker room door swinging open causes Noah to turn you around and press your back against his chest. His hard cock rests against your ass and you want to grind on him so badly, to make him feel good too.

“Noah, could I borrow your phone charger? I’ve lost mine already,” you hear Nick call out to Noah from the entrance of the room.

Noah covers your mouth with his hand and you breathe softly through your nose. His other hand cautiously rubs circles on your throbbing, aching clit as he responds, “Yeah, Nick, that’s fine. You can find it in the second pocket of my backpack.”

You start to grind up against Noah feeling his dick harden against your skin, again, and his hand pressing hard into your private region. You need relief.

Nick’s footsteps echo through the room, and you can feel your heartbeat matching the pace of his steps; so quick and to the point.

Noah continues his movements but goes a bit further to test the waters. He uses his weight to hike you up a bit further and you get the sign to stand on your tiptoes and bend your knees just a bit. Noah reaches his fingers between your thighs again and dips them in your slick cunt, slowly.

Your eyes roll back into your head, and you do your best to stay silent. You hope the running shower can hide how your breath hitches as Noah curls his fingers inside of you, stretching you out.

“Nick, when you find it,” Noah’s voice vibrates against you, “you can keep it. I have two others in my bunk.”

“Thanks, man. I got it now. Good night!” Nick says before you hear his steps towards the door and the door closing behind him.

With Nick gone, you moan against Noah’s palm on your mouth freely. His fingers are slim, but they’re so long and reach the best spots inside of you. His thumb rubs your clit as he fucks you with his fingers.

“Such a good girl for staying quiet,” he praises and removes his hand from fully covering your mouth only to prod your lips with his fingers to stuff them between your teeth. “Now, be loud for me.”

His name is broken as you try to say it, “No-ahhhhh, ple—please!” Your eagerness for full relief drives you to grind harder on his fingers, so much, you're bouncing on them and doing the work for him.

Noah supports your hips so you don’t slip on the wet tile. “I know, I know,” he says daringly while kissing the crown of your head. “Go ahead and cum, you deserve it.”

“Fuck, thank you—,” you hiss as you reach up and tangle your fingers up into the back of his hair. You release on his fingers and he hooks them to repeatedly hit your G-spot as you ride through your high.

“That was so hot,” he praises into your ear. “But, let’s try not to get caught again, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you laugh as you stand while holding the wall for support.

“Let me clean you up. We still need to actually take our showers,” he holds your waist and pulls you back into the water.

—

“Are the showers going to start being our new meeting place?” He chuckles as wraps your fresh towel around your shoulders. The one you stuffed into the locker when you came in. You patted yourself on the back for remembering to do it or else Nick would have definitely known you two were hearing together.

“Maybe,” you shrug at him with a smile. While you enjoyed your private meetings, you also wished you could say and do everything you wanted to you with him in front of everyone else. You could feel that keeping things secret was starting to get harder on your mental health. Sex is the main thing you don't mind keeping behind closed doors.

Noah’s head pops up as if he has had an epiphany. “Do you want to go on another date before we go to sleep?”

“Of course!” you match his excitement with your arms loosely wrapped around his waist.

“Good, because I already have an idea of where can go,” Noah reaches into the front pocket of his backpack to retrieve his phone. You peak at his screen as he opens his Yelp account and searches for the best milkshakes nearby.

—

Noah sits across from you in a black hoodie covering his hair. His lips are wrapped around one of the white and red striped bendy straws in your shared cookies and cream milkshake. He giggles as you pull out your phone to take a picture of him and his hand comes to cover your phone camera.

You playfully fight his hand away while snapping a couple of shaky pictures. “I need more pictures of you!” You whine. “You took so many of me when we were in Boston.”

“We can take one together,” he pulls his phone out of his hoodie pocket and angles it towards your faces. You both take a sip from the shake and he takes a picture. He looks at it before showing you, “You’re so cute.”

“Mhm,” you hum, sipping through your straw. This milkshake was definitely in the top three of all you have ever had. Noah knows how to pick good places.

“So, tell me,” he sits up a little higher in his seat before leaning forward. “Everything. Everything about you that you didn't day on our first date.”

“Noah, it’s past midnight,” you chuckle, but he still looks at you with eager eyes. He wants to know you. Everything about you. You mentally note that one day you could reach the level of comfort that Matt and you have, and you want to try to get there with Noah. “We have the next two days to talk, too,” you kick your legs in excitement and he smiles when they brush him. It’s pretty easy to touch him; his long legs take up the majority of the space under the tiny table you’re sitting at. “What should we do with all of our free time?”

“I have one idea of how we can spend a lot of our time together,” he shrugs and gives you a knowing smile.

“What?” You giggle with your tongue on the straw.

“You could share a bed with me at the hotel we get to stay in for the next two nights,” he suggests.

Your eyebrows raise in intrigue, “Mmm.”

“We would have to have one other person to share our room with us for the room costs to be worth it, but I would get to sleep next to you for real, instead of across from you,” he plays with his hands over the table.

“We’ve slept next to each other every night on the bus,” you think out loud. “I would feel comfortable with that, I think.”

Noah moves his fidgeting to the strings of his hoodie. You love to watch how nervous he gets talking to you. It’s charming. “I really like the way we talk to each other across the short space between us when everyone else is asleep,” he admits and you pout your lip at him in awe. “I’ve never told you this, but sometimes I’ll stay up and watch you sleep when you forget to close your curtain.”

You lean forward and rest your hand on your cheek.

“Also, because I stay up,” he sips on his straw. “That’s how I knew about— you know?”

You gulp down the shake in your mouth so as not to choke on it. He’s referencing what he reminded you of earlier in the shower. Noah. “Oh, yeah, that.” Your face heats up.

One of his hands shoots towards your open hand resting on the table. “That didn’t bother me by the way,” he reassures. “I’m flattered, honestly. Feel free to think about me all the time.”

You giggle before watching his fingers interlace with yours.

“You make me really excited, Y/N. I haven’t thought about being in a relationship with anyone for a long time. I feel so preoccupied with so many other things, but when I think about that with you… it feels possible.”

“Noah, that feels so good to know,” you say softly, it’s almost a whisper. You feel vulnerable now. “You have no idea how much of a dream it is to get to know you that way I had when I was just a fan three months ago.”

“I love that you’re a fan, but you’re also my equal. I was pulled into you the second I saw you. I still think back to us sitting on the patio bench at the L.A. studio together,” he squeezes your hand.

“Me too,” you agree. You two sit in comfortable silence for a beat.

“You don’t have to tell me everything I need to know about you, yet,” he chuckles. But, before we go back, can I ask you two questions?”

You push the empty shake glass to the side and hold both of his hands in the center of the table. “I’ll do my best.”

“That’s all I want,” he says. “First, do you say yes to at least rooming with me at the hotel the next two nights?”

“Yes,” you nod with an excited smile. Whether you’ll have to live with the consequences of your answer or not, you’ll see.

“Lucky me,” he smiles. “Second—,” he takes his time to continue, “what are you looking for with your time with me? Is it just fun, a relationship… I want to know.”

[thelittlegirlinwonderland]

What I'd Change about MHA

firstly, i'd put monoma in 1-a. i'd replace sato b/c i hate his character design and does he even do anything?

i'd make aizawa more of a stoic, scary looking guy but he just wants what's best for these kids. he doesn't lie to them or use ruses but he tends to push more and seems like a hardass to prepare them for the cutthroat life of heroics

i'd flesh out the characters more, their backstories, why they want to be heroes. i'd also build their relationships more. give them time to bond, spend time together outside of school without a disaster happening. filler type stuff

i like most of the plot up until the war arc, so i'd probably keep it, changing small things like stain. i think i'd make stain a former hero, like lady nagant, who saw corruption in his field and decided to handle it in the most extreme way. i would either get rid of stain attacking tensei or have it be a 'wrong place, wrong time' scenario where tensei found stain attempting to kill a different hero and wouldn't leave(similar to midoriya running in to save tenya)

ofa is one of the things about the og that annoys me. firstly, more than 9 users. probably 11-13. if it's supposed to be 2-3 hundred years since quirks, 9 doesn't make sense. especially since the first 3 were all around the same age and most of them died young. i'd also have more diverse users and quirks. i hate fa jin and gearshift, and danger sense and smokescreen don't make sense. blackwhip and float are great quirks. expand on the users' pasts as well. why were they chosen? what did they do with the quirk when they had it? also more izuku/vestige scenes. no random bakugou look alike user

i'd change a lot of the villain's stories. i'd change toga to actually be a victim of the system instead of just a blood-crazed lunatic. she was starved and didn't understand her cravings until she snapped and accidentally killed a classmate. from there, she's treated like a monster and pushed into the league who help her get the blood she needs which calms her down significantly. no wanting to become the people she loves and creepy harrasment of izuku and ochaco. just make her a scared teenage girl with no one else to go

as for shigaraki, when afo gets arrested show a slow change in his thought process, behavior, and lifestyle as he adjusts to life without the man who had been grooming and abusing him his entire life. make him realize afo isn't a helpful sensei but rather manipulating him. have him grow and reject afo and his ideas. have him start forming his own ideas of how he wants to change society

dabi is a tough one. i think i'd make him ostracized from his entire family. he had the quirk but not the body or mind for heroics. enji rejects him, rei can't stand his ambition, natsuo and fuyumi don't have anything in common and so he pushes them away, shoto is the masterpiece. this makes him more sullen and closed off. i'd have him run away instead of nearly dying and being save by afo. when he finds the league, he starts to open up more and develops more of a personality in this new family.

i wouldn't make kurogiri oboro. i think i'd scrap oboro as a whole. kurogiri is still a nomu but he has no ties to any heroes.

i'd have more people die in the war. more important heroes like all might, miruko, edgeshot, jeanist etc. bakugo stays dead, it's a tragedy that even someone as strong as him can't always win. maybe parents, friends, past classmates of the students because this is a war, collateral is going to happen. gran torino also should've died.

izuku: -make izuku's hair slowly turn white after he gets ofa so by the end it is completely white. this can be due to stress, having multiple quirks, getting a quirk when he didn't have one, etc. -all for one is his dad. this can explain why izuku can wield all of the past users' quirks, he's built to have multiple. now, this doesn't make afo a good person suddenly. he's still the man who groomed tenko and killed countless. maybe he just makes kids every now and then to get/make new quirks. it's just a game to him, he doesn't care about izuku or inko but it give izuku more personal stakes. -lean into izuku's analysis and intelligence more. -make monoma part of his friend group and have them bond over quirk analysis. -i think i'd make Mic his tutor. like how aizawa saw shinsou and decided to train him, mic sees izuku and his destructive quirk and decides to do something about it.

[wewerebornsextuplets]

idk how but you draw in the Oso-san style so good i need to know your secret please

HAHA thank you very much!! im glad you think so :D unfortunately im not very good at explaining how i work, but ill try my best to show what i mean!!

once again this is long as hell. you know the drill at this point

to be honest, half the battle i fight with drawing in the osmt style is just. Looking at it. the ososan art style actually fluctuates pretty wildly depending on what you're looking for, whether that be the mobile games (for instance, tabimatsu and hesowars look nothing alike in terms of style despite both being the same source material), official art and merch, or even the seasons of the show itself!

using ichi as my example here since i draw him the most, but its pretty easy to play spot the difference with the varying styles. even within a specific season you can do this across episodes, especially with season 1!

when i draw, i tend to be a bit sacrilege and use references across different media; usually ill use the show [especially season 2, if only because its a bit more "uniform"] as reference for the actual features and colors/poses/etc, but i like to use hesowars to reference proportions, since they seem to be most consistent there.

SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO NOTE: theres a WEALTH of fanartists that have styles that are INCREDIBLY similar to the show, so be careful to check your sources! these artists deserve credit for their hard work, which they often don't get since their work is reposted under the guise of being official art.

once you've pinned down the exact style you'd like to emulate, and the character you're looking to draw, its really just a matter of finding references, which is pretty easy! you can scrub through different episodes for good angles/shots, or if you're going for one of the game styles the AU wiki has most of the games catalogued to my knowledge. if you're looking to draw an oc, use characters you think they would look similar to in the show. if you really wanna waste your time, though, you can always scrub through crowd scenes in the show to see if any background characters might look like what you're going for; the season 3 episode Mt. Takao comes to mind, there were a lot of cute mob characters there.

using keiko as my example here, you can see that i pulled her features from multiple different characters to get her to look right in the style. with ocs, its important to reference a number of different characters, since the likelihood of a background character being a 1:1 for your little guy is unfortunately pretty low. there WILL, however, be a lot of characters that look KIND of like them. the key is to figure out what parts go where!

to this point, most prominent ososan women have very similar stock anime girl faces with very minor differences, so if youre looking to make a cute girl oc, most of the womens' faces can be used somewhat interchangeably. if you want your cute girl oc to have a more unique face, though, the movie gave us some women with more unique faces in the form of the NEETs' old classmates! theres also no harm in referencing male characters faces in this regard. #butchswag #kiruminikuya

BUT. going back to the assumption that you're drawing a canon character, today I'll be drawing oso for my example

when you're first getting a feel for the style, tracing some of your references can actually be a really great way to acclimate yourself to the characters proportions and features. think of like when you were a kid, and would trace over pictures of pokemon or cartoon characters so you could draw them better. its basically the same principle! this was especially helpful for me when it came to eyes; they vary the most wildly of any other trait that characters have in ososan, so going over the different shapes to get a feel for each of them was very important.

when you trace, though, I recommend doing so a bit more loosely, sort of like if you're doing a photo study for anatomy; block out the basic shapes and do small markers for different features (i.e small lines to denote where the eyes start and and, distance from nose to mouth, things like that), and from there draw the rest on your own.

after long enough you'll get a feel for the basic placement of where everything should go! the eyes and nose are undoubtedly the hardest when it comes to the sextuplets, since they shift around a LOT between games/seasons/etc. so don't feel bad if you have a hard time with that, since there isnt really a "right" answer with how frequently it changes. i still fuck it up all the time myself!

as for some basic tips, heres some stuff i try to keep in mind when drawing them that just helps the finished product look a bit nicer!

when drawing the hair + fringe line, its important to swoop it downwards a little bit; the flat across look Can work, but if you're not careful you risk showing the tops of their eyes, which is um. ew! ick! nast!

when a matsu is facing forward, their hair will usually tend towards one direction to keep the silhouette. in most screenshots i saw, the bowl cut points left! that said, dont be afraid to point rightwards if its better for your specific drawing!

and lastly: USE THE LIQUIFY TOOL. LIBERALLY. i am not joking when i say this has saved my ass so many times, its hard to get the placement right on the facial features and even harder to get everything to LOOK good, so if its available to you i HIGHLY suggest just squishing everything around with a liquify tool until it looks right. you can always go back and correct the blurry lines. its really a life saver

BUT YEAH! i dont know if this was very helpful but i hope you're at least able to gain something from it :-))

[scottxlogan]

Helllloooozzz I got really into scogan recently and because people never tag it it’s been hard to find domestic family fics for them and family fics are my favourite thing like, ever, and there’s only so many times a kitty like me can attempt to sift thru the mpreg tag to find something readable before it’s noggin goes a bit loose, so have ya got any recs ?? ^w^ I’ve looked up so many rec lists but no one lists family fics specifically :’3

Welcome to the fandom! You'll find a lot of really nice people here who will be able to point you in the direction of what you're looking for as there are some who probably know better than I do. If you're looking to chat with other fans there's a Scogan Events discord at https://discord.gg/FmJ24gFJ6X that takes part in a Scogan related bingo for writing, art, etc and other small events all year long. Plus, there's some great people to chat about Scogan with too if you're looking to interact with others who love the ship.

As for recs, I'm going to throw this out here for some of my followers to see if they have some favorites that might help you find what you're looking for. Off hand I know that Tweedle has written a few family fics with Scogan. They're up at her AO3 page at https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiAnLake/. In terms of my own stories, I know I've done a few and I'll list them below. I'm sure I'm missing some, but if anyone else has some recs/suggestions, please help me out here and add them for @beepmeowz if you can.

My fics (off hand that I can think of them. Not all are domestic fluff, but I'm sure some of my followers here can help out with the list of family stories)

Working It Out (One Shot/Rated T) Logan's stressed after finding Laura with a new companion who wants to be more than friends. Scott does his best to calm his husband down after Logan tries to follow Scott's approach to parenting.

Gone Forever (Multi-Chapter/Rated E) After the events of The Wolverine, Logan goes on a journey of his own to discover truths about the life he put behind him. An accident, a run in from a face from his past and a misunderstanding lead him closer to the truth he'd been seeking out, but will it be the key to his ending or his happily ever after? (This story features Scott as a single parent to a young Nathan as Logan finds himself finding love and embracing the family that was always just out of his reach)

Saturday Morning (One Shot/Rated G) Logan takes a moment to reflect on the blessings he's been given in his life.

We're All Different Now (One Shot/Rated M) When a mysterious woman from the future enlists Logan's help to change the past by saving Charles Xavier's life, Logan finds himself back in time at a pivotal place in time. With his mission to save Charles in mind Logan finds himself distracted by his feelings for Scott Summers, a man he loved and lost years before Logan was given a second chance to make things right. Armed with the mission to change only the fate of Charles and nothing else, Logan is torn between doing what was asked of him and following his heart to find a way to make things right with the one man he'd been forced to face a lifetime without the first time around. Will the second time around prove to be a means of repairing the damage that was done or will Scott and Logan's ill-fated romance repeat the same pattern with disastrous consequences?

And finally this one is a WIP series with a one shot and a multichapter, but it doesn't have a lot of family stuff yet as I have it still working out but it is a series that takes place after the movie Logan where Logan is still alive and finds his way back to Scott and Laura if you will.

It's up at

Scott makes a bold decision to resurrect his fallen lover, but in bringing Logan back to life, will it prove to be the key to saving the future or the key to destruction for humanity and mutants alike? How will Logan adjust to his return to a world that moved on in his absence?:

[viperwhispered]

*barges in like a maniac* THE DAY that school let's out and I am greeted with this! And now I'm THINKING!

So we've discussed before Jamil letting it all out and storming out but all the endings are super angsty cause Scarabia angst is the best angst in all of Twisted Wonderland. I have come suggesting an alternate ending since Jamil deserves to be happy:

After the break ends, Jamil finally picks up Najma's calls and she puts it on speaker. Jamil proceeds like this: he's sorry for yelling and storming out but not for what he said. As soon as he graduates he is flying off the see the world like he's always wanted and there's nothing they can do to stop him. Eventually he'll get a permanent job and settle somewhere nice where he isn't stuck at the mercy of the local tyrants. There is no working for the Asims and no servitude. This is happening whether they like it or not and the Vipers can just accept it and move on or he will never speak to his parents ever again and only Najma gets to meet any of his future children. Then he hangs up.

You'd think Jamil would be nervous while this is happening, but no. Why? Cause he just spent the best vacation of his life living in domestic bliss with his lover and now he's determined to make it last the rest of his life. It also come with the extra promise of "my children will not be slaves".

Another reason he's so confident is because he's eavesdropped on Kalim's secret meetings with Riddle where they study the laws of the Scalding Sands for legal support for Jamil's freedom.

I'd imagine Jamil's parents would be quite conflicted. However, the second they start leaning towards disowning him Najma flips out asking wtf is wrong with them and that if they disown Jamil for daring to have boundaries/a life outside of Kalim then they might as well disown her too.

So now the Vipers are really screwed cause there's no point in enforcing the time honored tradition on endentured servitude when you have no kids to sell into slavery. So the parents are quiet for now.

Also doesn't help that, when this whole fiasco started, Kalim loudly declared that Jamil was getting the whole vacation off and dared anyone to argue with him. Fortunately, Malleus had taught Kalim how to perfect a poison detection spell, so there weren't any worries about the food.

Najma had gotten really curious over Jamil's secret lover and, when a school event happened, she pounced. Honestly, it was pretty easy finding her in-law since they were wearing Jamil's hair tie. Of course, great minds think alike and fools rarely differ so now Najma is also platonically head over heels with Jamil's s/o. So now the poor reader is stuck in a tug of war between siblings.

So now the Vipers are stuck with their daughter going on and on about how the person they blame for "corrupting" Jamil is the most wonderful being who ever graced Twisted Wonderland. The awkwardness gets even worse when Najma starts nagging Jamil to just bring them over for the next fireworks festival.

So the Vipers agree to at least meet the famed charmer and Jamil responds by laying down the law: 1.There is to be no insulting or passive aggressiveness, be it directly or behind their back, towards my beloved. 2.There is to be no hostility whatsoever towards my dearest. 3.My future spouse shall be sleeping in my room. 4.My heart and soul will be treated just as well as any other guest. 5.If any of these rules are violated, don't expect me to talk to you until after I graduate.

So d-day roles around and the Vipers are forced to welcome the "homewrecker" into their home. Najma just tackles the reader the second they open the door and starts the tug of war with Jamil. With this visit, the Vipers are now cursing under their breaths because 1.Jamil and the reader might as well already be married 2.Najma adores the reader 3.They're a damn good in-law to have (*insert good personality trait here*, does chores, is supportive, etc). They're are now fully aware that no way in hell they were winning this and either have no legacy to speak of or they admit defeat.

They admit defeat.

What's Kalim doing while this goes down? He's given Jamil official orders to "be a good host" and invited friends over to have a week long slumber party. While Jamil battles his parents, Kalim is living it up with Malleus, Lilia, Trey, and Cater and everyone is just having a blast. Best part is that Malleus makes for an excellent assassin deterrent and anyone caught trying gets struck by lightning.

Nikki bonus: The thing about "x reader" fics is that we never get any in-law drama and it's arguably some of funniest shit ever. So let me ramble on about Jamil's encounters with the Deshna Bhavsar.

So some backstory: Nikki's grandparents has trouble conceiving, so they raised Deshna to possibly inherit their taleem (mud wrestling school). Even after Nikki's uncle was born, Deshna still kept on wrestling and could take down fully grown men twice her weight at 18. So Deshna goes to nursing school, but instead of going straight to work she decides to accept an arranged marriage proposal from Nikki's father who was the son of an old acquaintance of her grandfather who had gotten very rich. Now Nikki's bio dad was fine, but he was also a complete wimp who did nothing against his brother who was an abusive ass. Deshna took none of it but none of her in-laws ever supported her. When she realized she was pregnant, she had a major moment of clarity and she divorced her spineless husband. This caused everyone but her immediate family to disown her and she immigrated to Canada. Deshna started off working as the caretaker for an elderly man named Nicholas, who would go on to give some massive support and be the person Nikki was named after. Deshna got her nursing license and proceeded to devote everything into raising Nikki. When Nikki started experiencing their genders during puberty, this woman put herself in therapy and educated herself so her child would never fell abandoned. Deshna does resent the gods the gods she spent her whole life devoted to for putting her child through living hell at least one a week, but she knows Nikki is very stubborn and does her best to support them.

So Jamil is essentially facing off someone who's won the "Mom of the century" award 12 consecutive times and could fold him like a lawn chair if her ever so much as thought about disrespecting her child.

Deshna is a woman who is far too intelligent and observant for her own good and has neither the patient nor the tolerance for anyone's bullshit. So Jamil's flattery and masking will not fly with her. If you want a reference for what Deshna's attitude is like check out Sindhu Vee, this is woman I modeled Deshna after.

Nikki has been upfront about their relationship with Jamil since the beginning, so Deshna has heard everything from the overblot to the arguments over Kalim to "he's a hot asshole and I want to kiss his smug face". Like any good parent, Deshna has already come up with 101 reasons why Jamil is not good enough and is also dreading a repeat of Nikki's previous relationships.

So Nikki and Jamil get together and Deshna is shocked they lasted more than a week and have had almost no issues. Cut to one month later and they're still together and Deshna's like "ok bring him over I gotta see what's so special".

Nikki warns him that no masking will work with their mother but habits are hard to break. Long story short, Deshna baits him into an hour long debate which Jamil loses spectacularly (makes sense since he's never won a debate against Nikki either).

Deshna's conclusion: He's entertaining enough to argue with, lets see how this goes.

Jamil's conclusion: Mother in law or not, I will find a way to destroy this woman.

Nikki’s conclusion: This went much better than expected.

So now Nikki's kidnapping Jamil to hang out every weekend and Deshna has gotten to now Jamil so much better. Point is, Deshna is now bragging whenever possible about the absolute gold mine she has for a son in law. How could she not? He's smart, resourceful, got top grades at a top school, he cooks well, he cleans well, he loves her child, he knows how condoms work, he respects her child, ambitious, has powerful connections, etc.

Eventually, Jamil opens up about his home life and Deshna's response is to assure him that his parents suck anyways and that "Jamil Bhavsar" sounds so much better than Jamil Viper. Ngl tho no way in hell is Deshna letting this good of a catch slip through her fingers nor is she letting her child be turned into a slave.

Fun fact: in Bengali families, it is very common for family members to call you anything but your name. These nicknames are called Dhak names.

So, Deshna tends to call Nikki "Noni" and playfully refers to Jamil as "Daini" (which I've been told is the Bangla word for witch).

It certainly is not easy, putting up such boundaries with one’s parents, but I certainly would love for Jamil to be in such a position to do it with confidence, if it is something that needs to be done.

Hasdfs Najma spotting reader from the hair tie, tho. (Maybe I should’ve indeed sat down with this ask before doing the anything goes story prompt, since I didn’t even see this part but I love the idea. I mean, it’s not exactly inconspicuous, now is it?)

It is so sweet to think of Najma getting along with Jamil’s s/o, too. Plus, then there’s the potential of teaming up with Najma to tease Jamil, which, of course you gotta (I may or may not be the target of this with my partner and sibling irl, so, you know, definitely can see it happening).

Plus I’m sure Najma would also very purposefully be talking reader up to her parents, to try to convince them that they should just let it happen.

I do wonder, though… Surely Jamil should be laying down some rules regarding the treatment towards himself, too, not just s/o? (Basically, silly snek man, don’t just be protective of reader, consider yourself too, if you need to.) But perhaps that’s a matter for another time, once he himself gets a clearer idea of how he does (or doesn’t) want to proceed with his parents in general.

Oh boy though if it wouldn’t be nerve-wrecking to enter the Viper household in these circumstances (I’d be so ready to fight and throw punches for Jamil, ngl). Though now I’m also thinking of reader being extra sugary sweet, like southern US backhanded compliment style… Or just kill them with kindness in general, even while gritting one’s teeth.

Hasdfs I love Kalim’s slumber party tho. I can definitely imagine all sorts of hijinks, I mean with Lilia there too, of more or less “accidentally” dispatching any problems.

Deshna sure is an absolute badass and I want only the best for her.

Also those conclusions after the first meeting hasdfsdf I love these. What a dynamic.

(Also re: in-law drama, I have made up parents for the reader before so you know, can happen, but yeah, only something I’ve done in a longfic and not something you see that often.)

[crescenthistory]

Not a request, just a thought: barty x childhood best friend reader

OK, so, Crouch Sir and reader's dad are business partners and politicians in the wizard world and Barty and Reader meet early on life, like when they were something between 4 or 5 years old, and they became best friends (and each others only friends, their fathers weren't the best...) really quickly.

They parents keep letting they meet to play, afterall is good to business too. They grow up attached to the hip and being each other's safe place. It's always "Barty & Y/N", "Barty & his Treasure" (the nickname has a big meaning since Reader is the most important person in Junior's life), etc.

They go to Hogwarts together, and while Barty goes to Slytherin, Reader goes to Ravenclaw. Reader is roomates with Pandora (hc she didn't had a roomate/had only one bc no one wanted to be near "a freak like her" :( ) and Barty with Regulus + Evan.

Reader is also part of the Skittles and they befriend Dorcas (who's 1 year older), but she and Barty have something... special (love).

In summary, "Junior & Treasure" just are best friends who end up falling in love and stay pining for YEARS but only act on it on the middle of sixth year :) + they friends are SO. DONE...

Or

They only have platonic love towards each other ("Yes. I love Barty/Treasure, he/she is my best friend, but I'm not in love with him/her") and Rosekiller + Reader x someone (maybe Remus..? The angst of our poor boy, who already is insecure, thinking the girl he's in love with is dating someone like Barty Crouch Junior of all people is funny & sad...) happening is also amusing. Because nothing will break their bond and STILL would be extremely close.

P.S.: also, no Voldemort AU bc I can <3 / P.S. 2: it's heavinly inspired in a OC I have, but she doesn't have as much as daddy issues as Reader has there even though her father is shitty like Crouch Sir <3 (her father dies when she's 6, almost 7, and her mother — much younger than her father — marries another woman who was Reader mother's best friend in Hogwarts and Reader's godmother :) ) but I can send you the OC lore if you want...?

i love when people just infodump their ideas in my inbox !! keep em coming love 👯‍♀️🤍 i don't write oc stories on here, but i love hearing about them and have a lot of my own<3

the background you describe here about being each other's only friend and safe space is actually quite similar to a regulus x reader fic i've been working on for a while (you can find my trail of breadcrumbs about it under my beauxbatons!reader tag), so we truly are great minds thinking alike, anon (i also recently did a james x reader fic where james thought reader and barty were dating lol, our brains are like this 🤞)

but i find the idea of childhood bestfriendship with barty very intriguing indeed... i've always seen him as barely staying sane from crouch sr's frivolous use of imperio because he had someone grounding him throughout his abuse at home. oftentimes i make that his mother, a house elf or even evan&pandora. but childhood!bestfriend!reader being his rock gives immaculate angsty yearning possibilities

when reading this i also got the idea of an origin of barty calling reader treasure (because i always enjoy finding "reasons" for specific nicknames like that (for instance in modern aus i like thinking that remus made a typo calling reader "dove" instead of "love" one time and then it just stuck)) – if they met really young, i imagine barty and reader relying heavily on play pretend to get some relief from their home lives. somehow they come across a muggle children's book about pirates and are immediately hooked, play pretending as pirates every time they're together. barty would insist reader is the "treasure" – because every pirate worth's his money's got a treasure, and barty surely is a good pirate. it translates over to when you play hide and seek, when he finds you he's all "i found the treasure!" and from there on it just becomes the norm and slips into daily conversation until he calls you that more often than your name. because after all you are his treasure, you are why and how he got through it all, his person, his everything.

[oswildin]

I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to be excited for with Marvel? I don't wanna see RDJ Doom. I want a proper conclusion to the saga not just a throwaway. I don't want everything to be just thrown away for a reboot.

Idk with Marvel it always feels like I'm being punished not rewarded; like I stan the "wrong" characters (this became an issue starting maybe in Phase 3 at some point?), have put too much effort into the current saga and now even they want to throw it away, etc. Like idc about cameos and nostalgia but feel like I'm supposed to.

Sorry I'm not making sense rn. I don't mind the saga ending but I don't want them to throw away everything with it. I really liked how they made things like Dark World and Iron Man 3 elements people disliked more important/better later on and I want them to do that here too. What do you want to see?

I feel the stanning the ‘wrong’ characters thing lmao. Loki, Sylvie, Moon Knight, Agatha, Wanda… Like they either don’t get the same amount of content or they get killed off and given the tragic plot lines over and over - destined to never be happy.

I think my issue is that the nostalgia can only go so far. Cameos are great but it also feels like fan service overkill, which is why I’m leaning towards them doing a reboot because they have used so many cameos (spider-man & deadpool 3). They’re getting them all done now so they can wipe the slate clean (is how it feels to me).

I think they need to stop with the jokes every five seconds. After Ragnarok, which whilst is my comfort movie, it felt like every project used the same cookie cutter style. It works with some projects and not with others, and I feel Endgame suffered from that treatment, where it didn’t work as well as they had hoped/thought. I liked how each project had its own distinct style when the MCU first started, then it just began to kind blend together and each character began to just exhibit the same characteristics and personality.

For example: Thor in Age of Ultron felt like a good balance of comedy and seriousness and still kept true to the original source, whereas Thor in Ragnarok onwards, whilst is hilarious, felt more like comedic relief. Kate Bishop’s personality fits her, the wit and awkwardness, and it pairs well with Yelena’s deadpan humour, but then you have Kamala who is similar (to me) to Kate. And I get that having so many characters can be difficult to make distinctive, but I’m not too sure about when they put them in a film all together whether it will work because the characters will be too alike at their core.

So basically, I want the MCU to go back to having a distinctive difference between projects (like Moon Knight, WandaVision & Agatha All Along have done that pretty well I feel).

[demon-of-the-ancient-world]

Ok my *favourite* Athelstan headcanons I've come up with so far, complied from all my earlier compilations** go:

**and yeah, YEAH a lot of these are reiterations of what i've said a million times, fight meeeee

under the cut:

He needs very little sleep to function & his sleep schedule is a Mystery

Always A Little Too Cold, can't sleep without like 18 covers

Shares life/skills tips with Lagertha

They are each other's wingman/woman (& silently judge Ragnar together when he's Up To Something)

They mourn Gyda on the anniversary of her death each year

He pushes himself too far without knowing it sometimes, trying to exist through being way too stressed, exhausted etc.

Has trouble getting the at LEAST 3 languages he speaks straight in his head sometimes especially in those scenarios

Tends the garden at Ragnar's farm, and later keeps a little garden of his own, it keeps him calm and reminds him of his work at Lindisfarne

His birth name wasn't Athelstan, that's his chosen monk name (in a couple fics of mine I've called him Anselm)

Bakes bread like an absolute King

Good at cooking in general

Soup

Has an intense fear of thunderstorms/severe weather

Can swim if he has to but not a fan of water either

Ambidextrous (and would get in trouble at the monastery for occasionally using "the devil's hand" by accident)

But now he can fight with both hands so that's cool

Nearsighted (that's what spending years squinting at small print by candlelight will do to a guy)

It's rare for him to get sick

But when he does it hits him like an absolute truck. Like he won't catch a single cold for YEARS and then out of nowhere bam, stuck in bed for two weeks with the worst bug of his life

Lagertha helps him out if he's unwell, he's got some medical training from being a monk but like I said earlier when he's too stressed his brain does Not work

And he's also helped her with injury recovery after battles, sometimes giving her insight to things that would've been a lot more serious otherwise

Basically he's her physio coach

(he's tried to do this with Ragnar too but that man is Too Stubborn -- even when it's Athelstan)

Ragnar's INSTINCT is to immediately roast most things he says about his religion off bat-- but then he'll spend hours thinking about his takes anyway and come back like hold on what was that you said. And Athelstan is like. Aha.

He and Helga are best buds (to Floki's dismay)

Helga + Athelstan + Gyda flower crown making circle. Yes please.

Face turns beet red in the cold

Ragnar LOVES to playfully slap him on the back, throw an arm around him, hugs etc. which is all fun and great but sometimes he'll forget that Athelstan is like. Small. And will straight up knock him over.

Animals like him instinctively

He's that weird guy who brings his sketchbook to a party & draws people

But fr he has more trouble remembering faces than names (and to him all the Norsemen kinda look alike. He will never admit that.) so he keeps track of everybody this way

Eventually does get a tattoo on a wrist or ankle where it can't be seen by anyone

Sorta easy to not notice. He can be very quiet, to the point where if he wanted to sneak around and snoop he could with almost zero effort. But he doesn't bc morals???

Finds Ragnar's old clothes (that he's stuck with at the beginning of the series) comforting and doesn't mind that they're about four sizes too big -- he's used to loose oversized robes after all

Gyda had a crush on him when he first arrived and Bjorn teased her incessantly about it (Athelstan had no idea)

People get to know him as kind of an advisor and sagely type, and will come to him for advice (honestly...kind of like a priest would do. which is not a connection he makes anyone aware of, but it makes him happy)

Strategy game enthusiast

Learns to knit & makes his own clothes

Has a bit of a photographic memory

Learns to make tattoos despite having only one of his own

Tries to give Ragnar one at one point and they think it'll be a ~bonding experience~ but Ragnar will not stop squirming and Athelstan gets increasingly frustrated trying to get him to Hold The Fuck Still

....Phew

@grantairescurls @levithestripper @starrose17

I know I've bombarded you guys with so much Athelstan stuff that's probably super repetitive but ughhhghhhhhhhh I gotta exorcise these things

[radicalrefrigerator]

Happy International Asexuality Day to all aces in the world! Unfortunately, I'm late, I woke up this morning and realized I'd missed it- which is sad, because the day means a lot to me. I've been thinking a lot today, though, and had some things I wanted to say. 

Don’t let anyone ever tell you, “You’re too young to know.” You’re not. I’ve known for years I was aroace, before I had the terms to explain it, before I’d come to terms with it. I first learned what asexuality was from a friend on discord. They explained the meaning of the labels, and that it could be me. For a whole other year, I still didn’t accept it. I continued to believe there was something wrong with me, I was still young, I hadn’t found the right person, etc. Yet, the whole time, I knew it at the back of my mind.

Now, it’s been 2 years since I spiralled in my thoughts so much I stayed awake the entire night, and by the time it was morning, I’d accepted I was aroace. A lot of people would probably tell me it’s not that deep, but at the time, it was really difficult for me to come to terms with. I’ve never come out to someone who wasn’t accepting- I came out to a few of my friends immediately once I’d realized, all of them queer, and they were nothing but proud of me. It’s been more of an internal journey for me. 

It’s been 2 years. When I realized I was aroace, I was 14. I’m still young, but I know myself better now. I’ve matured, and I’m old enough to know for sure now. I’m aroace, and that’s probably not going to change- it’s who I am, and I would know if I wasn’t. So whatever your age is- don't let anyone tell you asexuality isn't a real thing, that you're making it up, or that you're too young to know. I knew when I was 12, listening to my friends talk about their crushes, and just quietly giggling here and there when I felt like it was on cue, but never actually saying anything, because I didn’t know where to fit into the conversation. Even fictional crushes were absolutely foreign to me. I knew when I discovered the song “Mad at Disney” and would sing “What the hell is love supposed to feel like?” over and over. I still don’t. And that’s okay. 

I can’t relate to every aromantic or asexual experience I’ve read on the internet or heard from friends. A lot of my inner struggle comes from the fact that most of my life, I’ve wanted love. I never actively searched for it, but in my head, I romanticized it. The idea of dates, holding hands, kissing and sex all sounded really great to me on paper and in books and TV shows and fanfiction but when the idea actually started being presented to me I found myself dodging it subconsciously. I still feel like this a lot today- but aromanticism and asexuality alike are spectrums. Desiring romantic or sexual connection, or having certain levels of attraction for people, doesn’t erase who you are <3

[ryemackerel]

MY HUSBAND AND I LOVE YOUR STUFF :3

As silly tntduoers we enjoy content, We constantly compare ourselves to them and your headcanons definitely call us out more(in a very pos way!!!) I love the way you write them and all the beautiful art you've created on your posts

Don't mind the fact I wrote this like an email(like the formality), Have a nice day/night/afternoon/midnight(etc) and remember to take care of yourself friend <3

HOLY CRAP YOOOOO HI SILVER!!!! i genuinely find that so cute holy crap you and your husband are amazing /gen /gen <3

knowing you guys find so much joy out of it, i will be so so fuckin happy to make more tntduo content for yall?? genuinely, i also see me and my partner as tntduo, i love how great minds think alike HEGHEGEHQGE!! hmu whenever you need a silly tnt doodle drawn for you guys

thank you so much for this message holy jeebers take care!!

[whateverthedragonswant]

7x04 - Buddie is all over this episode and not because we finally got Bi!Buck confirmation

Alright, we got some fanfuckingtastic food this episode and while I'm still celebrating over here in the corner for Bi!Buck becoming canon and how important that is not only for bisexual representation in mainstream media but also for his character, I have to talk about Buddie. (I am not diminishing this great moment for Buck, I promise)

Don't get me wrong. I like Tommy and I'm excited to see how this all pans out and to explore this journey with Buck. Not to mention the whole "Maybe you're more of a Team Jacob kind of guy" from Sal to Tommy back in 2x09, I'm glad to see it come full circle like this because they could have chosen someone else for Buck. Plus he and Buck do have chemistry.

But I have to be honest, my personal opinion is that Tommy is another case of this. Here's a whole list of why:

Another Name Ending with "ee" Sound: Edd-ie -> Tomm-y

Army connection: Both were in the army; both are connected to helicopters (and we know how important the helicopter symbolism is for Buddie)

Dressing Alike: Tommy and Eddie are dressing alike (when Eddie picks him up)

Looking alike: In certain lighting (like outside Buck's apartment door), Tommy has a similar look to Eddie

Immediate Side-eye: Buck had a similar reaction to Tommy and Eddie's friendship that he had to Eddie when the latter first joined the 118

Working Out: We even go back to the working out scenario (callback to 2x01) but this time, Eddie isn't working out, he's talking to Tommy on his phone, it's Ravi around this time not Chim, and Buck is once again trying to get Eddie's attention, but this time not competitively; if this were strictly about Buck's attraction to Tommy and trying to get his attention, Buck wouldn't have gone to this trouble; if Buck wanted to get Eddie's attention platonically because of his platonic jealousy, the basketball game was a better route than lifting weights (which is why they have the basketball delivered at the end of that scene)

Tsunami Callback: Tommy helped the 118 with flying the helicopter into a hurricane to land on the capsized cruise ship to rescue Bathena; it's not as overt and may be unintentional on the writers' part (who are we kidding? we KNOW these writers) but it calls back the tsunami arc for me from season 3, with Buck's and Eddie's separate involvement due to Buck's situation, this time they're together but Tommy isn't part of the 118 anymore

The Kitchen: Buck and Tommy in the kitchen - Buck opens a beer but doesn't drink it, Tommy declines one - we know open beer bottles/having a beer is also an important symbol for Buddie - this felt very much like a callback to 3x09 where Buck was getting that close to Eddie, this time Tommy was the one to get closer to Buck - and it also brings to mind 4x12 where Taylor was talking to Buck and Eddie about the treasure hunt, where Taylor told Buck she loved him in season 5 - the kitchen is not only important for Buddie but also for Buck's most important relationships (Eddie, Christopher (from the season 6 dinner), Maddie, Albert, Chim, etc)

Asking Parallel: Buck reveals Eddie has been asking him to play basketball but he always turns him down, now he asked Tommy & Tommy is going; Buck "asks out" Tommy and offers to buy him a beer, not once but twice Tommy turns him down until the kiss happens; Buck asks Eddie back in 7x01 to go go-karting & Eddie turns him down, saying he has a date as does Christopher

More of the Taylor/Eddie parallel: Ashley C, a dental hygienist, (think "always smiling"/teeth, Taylor on camera) tells Buddie "I love dalmatians" (something we know Taylor referred to Buck as) and Ashley A (a flight attendant btw, a subtle reference to the helicopter thing) says "I feel so lightheaded, I'm having palpitations". Two different Ashleys but it's no coincidence that Ashley "A" is the one to give the Eddie reference (we all know he had that situation going on back in season 5)

Buck keeps mentioning the Tommy/Eddie connection: "You and Tommy have a lot of things in common" - he mentions it twice, once to Eddie and then once to Tommy later in the kitchen

Eddie asking Buck to watch Christopher: While Eddie hasn't asked Tommy to watch Christopher because he usually is out with him, it's mentioned that Christopher has met Tommy and approves; Eddie then asks Buck to watch Christopher after mentioning he's already asked Marisol twice to watch him twice that week - not only does this dialogue put Marisol and Buck on the same level for Eddie in who he trusts but also, in an episode where tons of paralleling is going on, relationship wise in the dialogue (they could have not had Eddie mention that when asking Buck or just say Marisol was busy or something else)

The Chim Factor: once again, Chim is being involved (as is Madd-ie who has also been a parallel for Eddie before) - from 2x01 to now, he's always had a front seat to the Buddie show, no coincidence that he was brought to the basketball game by Buck or that he ends up being there to look over Eddie once he's hurt

The Bachelor Nod: the Bachelor named Joey and the male host that both Maddie and Josh are falling all over themselves to talk to is Jesse (ties into the two Ashleys, the two Sarahs) - I've never watched The Bachelor so I have no idea if Jesse and Joey are actually real (I'm assuming maybe due to the credits) but interesting that out of all the guys they could have chosen be a guest to do this spot, they have another J name, again in an episode where we're getting a name two different ways not once but twice and again, the parallels

Season 5 ATC callback: I also find it interesting that Joey approaches Chim and has his hand on Chim's shoulder the same way we saw Eddie do with Buck back in season 5 when they were treating someone on the ground, at the Air traffic tower, after Ashley A pinned her wings onto Joey

Conchata connection: This character feels like a connection to Eddie not just due to the mention of Mexico but also that "Conchata" comes crashing into the scene; feels/appears like one thing at first but then we find out differently and the real Conchata has been there all along, just waiting to be found - could this be foreshadowing? or a callback to how Eddie first came into the 118 and it looked like there was going to be a rivalry but it turned into something else?

"Seriously cool": Not only is Christopher impressed with Tommy, but Buck obviously is, too. We all remember only too well who else Buck found to be this level of cool and going on and on to Maddie about (hello 2x01 my old friend)

Getting attention: Buck admits he was trying to get Eddie's attention (but not to Eddie); Buck admits to Tommy that he was working hard to get his attention

The Ashleys: Ashley A is from Corona, CA (both Buck and Eddie now live in CA as does Taylor) while Ashley C is from Florida (Buck is from PA I think and Taylor I forget where but Midwest I think? I can't remember for her, please feel free to correct me in the comments, Eddie is from Texas)

"It's only been two weeks": Buck mentions this more than once, that Tommy and Eddie are best buddies after only two weeks - subtle inference back to season 2 where Buck met Eddie and within an episode they had become best buddies and again, the weights scene

Buck's Reaction Compared to Maddie's: while Maddie tells Buck to stop acting like the 14 year old girl she was, her reaction was different though the motivating factor was similar - both Sarah B & Sarah S were blonde, Maddie dyed her hair & wanted to change her name to fit in with them because she was jealous and missed her best friend - Buck (yes, I know he's an adult but he did admit he was acting similarly to Maddie), the only way he tries to fit in is with basketball, before that, it's all about getting the attention of both Eddie and Tommy (and by them showing us the Eddie phone and weights scene plus the basketball package (after he's turned Eddie down so many times) they're subtly letting us know that this isn't just about Tommy)

"Evan": the only other two men (from the 118) to call Buck Evan are Chim and Eddie (I don't think Bobby has before, but I could be wrong) = not a coincidence that now Tommy is (and frequently) and again, also no coincidence that Chim has a front seat to this (when Chim has also been paralleled with Buck like last season & Maddie has been paralleled with Eddie before)

Basketball Game Apparel: Chim is wearing his LAFD hoodie while Tommy is wearing a grey hoodie tank; Buck and Eddie are wearing tank tops (different cuts but both dark colors); as we all already know, TV and this show will use costuming to show when two people are on the same page, doing the same thing, or there's something going on for those two characters that is trying to be conveyed to the audience without being overt. I mean, hello:

(regardless of how these relationships turned out in these series, you get my point)

Considering Eddie and Buck aren't on the same page right now (Eddie has no idea about Buck's jealousy until Buck does what he does at the game), and while they might be playing the same game, it's against each other, so that only leaves one thing:

So there is a lot of connection between Tommy and Eddie:

(and some serious callbacks to Taylor - I mean, look at that above, TV at the end of the unit #)

We even see Tommy and Eddie keeping an even pace as they're walking away from Buck.

Plus, we also got more callbacks to season 3, for Eddie (which connects back to that 3x09 kitchen scene again because of the context of that conversation between Buck and Eddie): "Tommy's friends with the promoter so we got ringside seats. I felt like I was the one throwing the punches."

But here is where it gets even more interesting:

Tommy is also paralleling Buck.

Tommy mentions being jealous of the 118 and seeing how much of a tight-knit unit they are, after he's been out of there for a while -> Buck was initially jealous of Eddie back in 2x01 because he thought he was being replaced in his 118 family (and appeared to feel the same way about Ravi until we found out differently)

Tommy appears to know exactly what Buck is talking about with dating someone he's rescued by saying "They're always so grateful"

Tommy is part of the pre-original 118 lineup (who knew Chim and Hen); Buck is part of the original 118 who obviously knows Chim and Hen

Christopher cannot stop talking about Tommy to Buck and Buck to Tommy

Eddie asks Tommy to go to basketball after Buck has turned him down several times

Tommy has become Bestie!Buck 2.0 for Eddie in Buck's absence (in Buck's eyes) though there's no reasoning for this absence outside of Eddie's new relationship & Buck's turning Eddie down for an activity (this absence is alluded to when Eddie finds out for the first time that Buck is no longer with Natalia)...well, really 3.0 because, you know...Lena (who also brought Eddie to a fight btw with "ringside" seats, who knew the organizer)

I guarantee we'll get more connections to both as this develops, but I don't think Buddie is out for the count. Especially after seeing the promo for next week's episode. Not so much because of Eddie and Marisol seeing Buck and Tommy together, but Buck's obvious tension that Tommy reacts to before Eddie even shows up, and then Buck's reaction to Eddie showing up.

To be fair, this is all new to him as he states so it makes sense that he's still figuring things out for his own journey. But, at the same time, there did not need to be this many connections that the writers purposely made to either Buck or Eddie for Tommy. That's why, as excited as I am to see how Buck/Tommy plays out, I also think it's like what Ana Flores was for Eddie (though obviously very different relationship dynamics and characters), to get Buck to open up and have this realization about himself, to explore it, and end up wherever he does. So all in all, this should be interesting, for Buck's character alone as much as for Buddie.

Thoughts?

[anamericangirl]

(Girl who sent the two part ask here, just wanted to tac on something I forgot to mention 3/2 ) Something I feel is also criminally glossed over time and time again is the amount of children who feel uncomfortable in their bodies and or some form of dysphoria as a result of violation/ exposure to sex too young. Regardless of the form it’s in. (Molestation, rape, watching porn, etc) These are real issues. If you look up the statistics, the amount of “dysphoric” children (and adults, as well) who turn out to be victims of sexual abuse is appalling. And instead of giving them the support they need after these crimes, (THERAPY) we rush to validate a wholly unhealthy coping mechanism. It’s like someone witnessing a murder, and turning to alcoholism to cope, and instead of people discouraging a destructive behavior, people rush to make it okay to drink excessively in public and give them surgery to have an artificial liver put in so they can continue to drink as much as they want and being mad at anyone who questions these things. You’re not helping anyone by blindly affirming them, especially people who feel this way as a result of some sort of trauma. We are doing people a great disservice by saying, if you are gnc in any way, if you feel uncomfortable in your body, then the immediate next step should be some form of transition. The fact of the matter is, even socially transitioning kids has been shown to be psychologically harmful. And a lot of these kids are most likely looking for approval, attention, and praise from the adults around them, because that is what all children are naturally inclined to do. It’s how humans develop. And I never even touched on the amount of kids who these parents are transitioning in childhood because they like to do things that are stereotypically associated with the opposite sex. So many of those kids just turn out to be gay, or just straight people who aren’t a walking stereotype. Not every single action a child makes is a groundbreaking view into the inner mechanisms of their mind. There are little girls who at 3 years old will attempt to pee standing up and say “I a boy mama” and it means absolutely NOTHING. One of the key ways human children explore and learn (and have since the dawn of humanity) is by imitation. It’s normal and healthy for them to explore different things. They should not be chastised or pushed into transitioning (even if it’s “just social”) as a result of these behaviors. They’re starting from scratch, being formed out of seemingly nowhere, where all they know for almost a year of their existence is a womb, and then being thrust into this crazy ass world trying to navigate it all. Children cannot give “informed” consent. It is was and always will be predatory towards children and adults alike to push transition upon the mentally Ill, victims of sexual crimes, people who don’t fit into the stereotype of their sex, or people who are just fucking gay and that’s fine! You as a parent shouldn’t be jumping into rash decisions after a google search because your 12 year old daughter likes short hair and hates dresses. If you don’t think it’s predatory to push these things in the classroom under the guise of it being sex Ed and that it’s okay for schools to not tell parents what’s being fed to their kids or that their kids are internalizing these messages, you’re just a groomer and there’s probably no helping you. (May have sent this twice? Tumblr was being stupid)

( Last one I PROMISE 4/2) At the end of the day, if you are a legal adult, I don’t really care what you do with yourself, but your right to swing your fist ends at my face. So I and many others do have a problem with people demanding we affirm and conform to their personal choices (denying basic biological reality, calling them things they are not, giving them access to spaces that are not rightfully theirs, and pushing this lunacy on to vulnerable adults and children, to name a few) The amount of actual transsexuals (people who actually have diagnosed gender dysphoria) in the world is very few. The reason why where seeing more and more self proclaimed trans people nowadays isn’t because of “increased awareness and education” it’s largely because, being trans online is clout city if you wanna put it on social media, it makes it so you can behave abhorrently and be largely untouchable (or else you’re a bigot!), it puts you in a position to punish and cancel those you dislike by crying “transphobia!!” Every five seconds, it’s pushed upon anyone who feels unhappy with the expectations put on them because of their sex, are insecure or ashamed of their sexuality, or who feels uncomfortable in their body, and of course a big seller for adults and kids, it gets you brownie points, attention, praise, sympathy, and coddling GALORE. Are you a completely uninteresting person? Do you bring nothing to the table? Do you want some zest in your personal life? Just be trans! Now for a lot of people that’s too much, so if you’d like a lighter option you can consider our most popular package, she/they! (Also available in he/they and they/them). Kids have a hard enough time navigating the first 25 years of their life as it is. They don’t need more bullshit being pushed on them, especially not in place of actual therapy and mental health treatment if they truly have a problem.

I would again like to take the time to apologize to the owner of this blog, I know I wrote an absolute novel, and you’re probably going to have a hell of a time trying to post these and may or may not be bombarded by idiots as a result, but as someone who was groomed by several different individuals as a child I get incredibly frustrated with people trying to groom children out in the open (and make no mistake, it is grooming.getting these children alone, demonizing their parents, creeps online saying stuff like “I’ll be your parent now” it’s textbook.) and then emotionally manipulating people who question them by saying their kids are going to commit suicide. It’s not right to do this to vulnerable adults, but pushing your weird sex change fetish onto children is abhorrent and should be seen and treated as such.

It’s true and you should say it!

There have been studies published showing that many of those that detransitioned stated they realized their dysphoria was related to “other issues” and people aren’t paying attention to that!

When a child indicates they feel like the opposite sex it’s never like “oh that’s not normal let’s try to find out why they are feeling that way” it’s always “well that means you are the opposite sex so let’s go get that feeling affirmed and put you on puberty blockers.”

That should never be the first option.

Not to mention, like you said, being trans is “trendy” these days. The amount of people identifying as trans has gone up dramatically since the social media became a thing and there are so many testimonies of detransitioners saying social media was a huge influence in their decision to start transitioning because in those online circles they’re all just working to convince kids they’re in the wrong body and that they need to transition to be truly happy and not kill themselves.

There could be a myriad of reasons why someone might be experiencing dysphoria and every attempt should be made to get to the root of the issue and try to prevent the dysphoria from continuing or getting worse before you start “affirming” it. Because chances are, if it’s from something like abuse, transitioning isn’t going to solve the problem.

And I really hate how our culture celebrates the transitioning of children, and even adults, by saying they “found their true selves” as if they fucking know that. How do they know they weren’t their “true selves” before and this transition isn’t a symptom of a serious problem, like it usually is? Transitioning is celebrated as if people actually are born in the wrong body and are girls when they’re boys and boys when they’re girls instead of being seen as the mental illness it is.

These people need help and celebrating their mental illnesses and gender dysphoria and referring to that as their “true self” is incredibly disgusting to me.

[embossross]

The Devotion of the Girl in the Mirror

Chapter 3 >> Chapter 4 >> Masterlist

✣ Pairing: Rindou x AFAB fem!Reader

✣ Warning: 18+ explicit content, minors DNI

✣ Series: part of the In the Belly of the Beast fic universe

✣ Chapter CW: cockwarming, rough blow jobs, orgasm denial, light asphyxiation, mention of weight gain treated as negative, clumsy assignation of Japanese pet names by English speaking author (I tried 😞😩)

✣ Story CWs: BDSM dob/sub relationship; sex (oral, ptv, pta, etc.); genre typical drug use, alcohol, smoking

✣ Synopsis: A story of two lonely people find love for better or worse. Or, dom!Rindou is sweet on his girl. Or, on paper, you and Rindou have nothing in common. But sometimes chemistry defies logic, and with every conversation, you find yourself more bewitched until all you see, smell, or hear is Rindou.

✣ Word Count: ~6k

The gamy smell of cooking beef floods the space under your tongue. Your eyes track your mother as she turns down the heat to a simmer and tosses a few extra slabs of beef into the pot. For once, you’re home to eat a proper dinner with your mother, and she’s made a special occasion of it, springing for pricey cuts of meat to make sukiyaki.

“The tofu is a nice color,” you comment, hoping to hurry along to the part where your mother serves you a heaping bowl. All you ate today between classes was a granola bar and banana.

“Give it another minute. I swear! You’ve never had any patience,” your mother scolds.

“Not where my stomach is involved,” you agree.

“Have you been eating well? I worry with you always running out the door.”

“I’ve been eating too well. I’m afraid to step on a scale at this rate. I’m not sure there’s a restaurant in Roppongi I haven’t tried at this point.

“Roppongi? Why are you spending so much time there?”

There is no conspiracy to keep your mother out of the loop when it comes to Rindou. Unlike most of your classmates, you always considered your mom more a friend than a strict parental figure. Days and nights alike took your mother out of the house to man cash registers, stock shelves, iron suits, and mind other families’ children as the opportunity presented itself; so, in her stead, you took on the mantel of de facto mother to your little sister, of homemaker for your older brother. Rare nights with your mother at home were often spent debriefing her on the goings on of the household, which created a uniquely female solidarity between you both, a kind of perverse equality that warped the boundaries of parent and child.

You told your mother about your first heart break, first kiss, and every other milestone, so when she asks about Roppongi, you remind her that you’ve been seeing someone and offer up a few details: what he does for work (export/import), where he lives (Roppongi), how you met (a lie about a coffee shop).

“I recognize that look in your eye,” your mother says. “You’re in love.”

“Oh, because I’ve been in love so many times before?” you scoff.

“Exactly because you haven’t been in love before. This look is different. New. But I’ve seen it on other women far too many times. Tell me, what is it about this boy that has you falling in love?”

You slurp your udon, stalling not because you need time to think of an answer but because the answer is too readily available.

All your great heroes are writers, yet you never reckoned yourself one until recently when you started a journal. Great, heaping emotional confessions splay out across the pages as you unburden yourself of the too-big-feelings you harbor for Rindou. His every advantage and grace is captured on those pages, and the only trouble is translating the truth into something less scandalous for your mother’s ears. Because you may be close, nearly friends, but you cannot tell your mother that when Rindou chokes you, in the space between thinking and emptiness, you could make yourself a home.

“Well, he’s always there for me. Even when he’s busy. I know I can rely on him when it’s important,” you say.

Translation: Rindou works without making it his life, placing it lower in the balance of his priorities than time with you. It is a privilege to commit to lovers or even family over work. Your mother’s chapped hands, reddened from nights doused in dish detergent remind you of her sacrifices every time she stirs the pot. Rindou, free from those worries and hardships, strikes you as a fairytale prince.

Only a few weeks ago, he dropped everything to come to your side in the middle of a workday.

You normally answer texts within a matter of minutes, so five weeks ago, when half an hour passed with Rindou’s message left on read, he called you. Brave face on, you tried to answer like nothing was wrong, but sniffling tears warped the words, and Rindou forced you to admit what had happened.

“It’s not a big deal. I just got a really bad mark on my last essay. The professor’s comments are…harsh, yeah, harsh…but I’m okay,” you blubbered.

“What an asshole. Tell me where you are, and I’ll come pick you up,” Rindou said.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Seriously, I’m just being a baby. It’s not like I failed the class. From here on out, I just need to get A’s on all my assignments,” and here you drew a shaky breath as all A’s would be a near miraculous feat, “to pass the class. You work hard, and I’ll see you tonight.”

“Forget that. Tell me where you are now.”

“You said you had an important meeting with investors –”

“Don’t’ be a brat,” Rindou warned, and your jaw clicked shut and stayed there. “You think I give a fuck about this meeting? Compared to you? Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to find the closest froyo or ice cream shop. Go there and drop me your location. Then, buy every flavor with every topping you can imagine wanting. I don’t care if there are twenty bowls, and you take one bite from each. Buy every kind you like. Once I’m there, I’ll cheer you up, baby, but until then, treat yourself on me.”

The day played out exactly as Rindou commanded. You nursed a stomachache that night as Rindou listened to you talk through your anxieties. He treated you so softly as you cried that you couldn’t remember what you were so worried about when morning dawned. He never once checked his phone for messages from work, all his attention on you.

“What else? He’s a great listener. He doesn’t talk as much as me, and before you say it, Mom, yes haha, who out there talks as much as me? You’re hilarious. But, um, he isn’t just not talking, but he’s really listening even when I don’t think he is,” you say.

No translation needed for this one.

Slumped in his seat, eyes hidden by his bangs, sometimes you worry you are talking to a wall when you tell Rindou about your day. The problem is especially painful over the phone, where you can’t search his body language for any clues, and his affirmative noises come few and far between.

You told yourself that he cared, but sometimes, when you were at your lowest, it was hard to believe.

All your lingering worries were relieved shortly after New Year’s, when you broke the seal on staying over at Rindou’s place and began joining him several times a week at his apartment for nights of long, dirty sex. Times not spent in bed together usually found Rindou playing video games or listening to music, while you did your homework in a pile of blankets on his heated floors.

You thought you knew Rindou’s apartment inside and out until one day you dropped an earring on the floor. You lazily tapped around with your feet, but when it didn’t turn up, you dropped to your belly to look under the bed. Your earring shone gold and unmistakable, but your greedy eyes glossed over it to latch onto a pile of books. There were only a couple books in the stack, but as browsing other people’s libraries was one of your greatest pleasures in life, you crawled out from under the bed with the humble bounty in tow.

The first book compiled the short stories of Edogawa Rampo. The paper cover looked uncracked. New book smell oozed off the pages when you pressed your nose against them. You traced the titles on the back, picking out a few favorites like ‘The Human Chair’ to read later.

Impressed as you already were by Rindou’s taste as you long enjoyed Rampo’s uncanny valley explorations of 20th century new Japan, you were equally surprised to find Kani by Kōno Taeko as the next book. You remembered mentioning her work to him a few months ago as something you hoped to make time for outside your studies because while you loved 19th century literature, you also enjoyed the modern classics when time allowed.

The next book after that weighed heavy in your hands, and when you saw the title, you dropped it hard on the floor. Hakkenden. Rindou was reading Hakkenden. A bookmark saved his spot on the nineteenth of ninety-eight chapters.

You had been working your way through the epic behemoth, one of the longest in world literature, for the better part of two years and often brought it up in conversation. Rindou would sit stone-faced and seemingly bored as you talked about the most recent chapter. Yet here was the book. And now that you thought about it, you’d mentioned Rampo to him as well.

“Why are you on the floor?” Rindou’s voice came from behind your shoulder.

“You’re reading the books I talk about!” you squealed, holding the massive tome up in accusation.

Rindou scratched the back of his neck. “Well, yeah, but not all of it. I wanted to read everything you mention, but you read too fast for me. I got through Kani pretty fast in between meetings, but Hakkenden slowed me down way more than I thought. You weren’t kidding about that thing.”

“But just because I mention it doesn’t mean you’re going to like it. I could make better recommendations tailored to your tastes,” you said.

“That’s not the point. I’m reading them so we can talk about them,” Rindou said.

Heat swelled in your chest, and you understood for the first time why ancient peoples believed the heart was the source of all love. You dropped your books to the floor and took Rindou’s hand.

“Rindou, baby, sit down on the bed. I’m going to suck your cock now.”

“Oh, are you?” Rindou scowled, but his voice was light and unoffended, just the hint of the thwarted dom peeking through.

“Yeah, just this once, shut up and let me,” you said.

And maybe he understood how your heart pulsed in your chest, or maybe he just wanted his dick sucked because Rindou didn’t argue. He had, after all, proven he knew how to listen.

Face hot at the memory of what happened next, you fan yourself, hoping your mother will think it’s from the heat of the sukiyaki. Your mother, for her part, nods wisely.

“Listening is good. You do like to fill a silence. But understanding is something else. Some men seem like good listeners but truthfully they just have nothing to say,” your mom says, sage advice stemming from a decade plus of caving to the glorified fuck boy masquerading as a man that was your father.

“No, I know,” you agree. “But I do think he understands. When I dated Sensyuu for a bit – remember him? The guy from the factory? The one with the goatee – well, I thought he was so experienced and smart because he was in this thirties, but I know now that he was an immature idiot. With Rindou…it feels like he’s so intuitive. Like there’s so much about the world and people that he understands and could teach me.”

“Wait, how old is this boy again?” your mother asks.

“Relax, Mama. He’s only twenty-eight,” you reassure her.

“And you’re turning twenty-two in a few weeks…I suppose that’s reasonable. About the same as your grandparents,” your mother allows.

Relieved by your mother’s approval, you take a meaty bite of beef, chewing slowly to savor the flavor. Rindou never fashioned himself as some great teacher with you the pupil. Yet, you do learn so much when you’re with him. Not facts or even opinions, but about yourself. From his example, you discover a confident way of moving through the world, unapologetic of making a scene or breaking some social more that no one could justify in the first place. He shows you how to have fun outside of books, to take risks. And, oh how deliciously he teaches you about the limits of your own body.

Fucking Rindou teaches you about the pleasure of anticipation. Obliterating and ossifying as an orgasm may be, you learn to relish the ascent to the pinnacle, the delights of the journey. Discover that stretching the moments leading to the fall, finding new ways to lengthen that coiling rope inside your tummy, not only intensifies the descent, it is the very point.

Thus, every moment you spend with Rindou’s hands on your skin becomes a kind of pre-climax, like snacking on sweet grapes before a swish of white wine.

Because you are always listening to him, for his words and the subtle language of the body. If he nudges you with a thigh, you leap to correct your position. To his word, you follow. Such ecstasy in obeyance. And in every moment that passes without his direction, you wait and enjoy the act of waiting.

One time, a work emergency popped up, a problem with customs at the shipyard holding up a barge of goods. The call came right as Rindou promised you could cum after an hour of teasing cruelty. Your body was bowstring tight, ready to fire, when cursing to himself, Rindou unwound from your body and set to work. It went without saying that you did not dare cum then.

You tried to regain his permission, petting his arm, thumbing at your own pussy, and crying to soften the coldest of hearts, but Rindou didn’t even discipline you for the brattiness, too focused on his work.

Annoyed when your attempts didn’t let up, Rindou gave you a task of your own, pushing your head into his lap, your throat swallowing up the full length of him, and keeping you still with a submission hold.

Now, you cried in earnest, not just because of your needy pussy but the ugly obstruction that blocked your throat. Intellectually, you recognized that you could breathe through your nose, but your body insisted it couldn’t, that you would die here, suffocated on his dick. And for the next half hour, as Rindou made phone call after phone call, that’s what you did. You choked and whined and cried until your tears mixed with the steady stream of drool that streamed past your overstretched lips and down his balls. The details of Rindou’s phone call went straight over your head as your mental faculties busied themselves with restraining your hands and feet, both of which wanted to kick and claw for survival.

Finally, Rindou hung up the phone. The work crisis handled.

Thrusting up, he managed to choke you on the bare centimeter of his dick not already buried in your wet mouth. A few bruising pumps, and then his cum rushed unimpeded down your throat. Thick and rich, he came with more spurts than he’d ever gifted you before, and your body quivered with it.

Only then did Rindou dip one finger down to your clit and tap. Tiny inconsequential nudges, yet your edged and desperate body answered that knock by throwing open the door of your orgasm. You came like your own personal rapture, sending you first to hell and then to paradise as your body spasmed uncontrollably. Then, Rindou reincarnated you with a kiss to the cheek, and you were whole once again, staring into those velvet eyes.

“Well, it sounds like young love,” your mother says, and you nearly choke on a mushroom as her voice rips you violently from torrid daydreams. “Just remember that no matter how much you love this boy, you should never let him push you into doing something you don’t want. If he threatens to leave, let him. Benefit from my mistakes. Don’t go repeating them. Don’t ever make yourself small for a man.”

These words are delivered blithely as your mother pokes at the simmering pot with a chopstick. Yet she touches her wrinkling neck as if on reflex. You remember once staring up at then supple and unmarred skin with the uncomplicated, admiring gaze of an infant or small child. You were young when you came to see your mother as a tragic heroine, a sympathetic one sure, but one doomed by her narrow choices or maybe by the lessons learnt from her own mother and her grandmother before that. Because there was no shepherding hand to guide her away from unloving men, no strident lessons woman-to-woman about the need for her own money, to never empty her pockets with the trust that some man would fill them. When other girls went through the stage where they became hypercritical of their mothers, picking at faults and laughing at the sad repetitions in their lives, you continued to look at her with that child’s loving eyes. You drink up the words of concern and advice as if she delivers the scripture.

You feel pride in your relationship with Rindou as you can put your mom at ease without telling a single lie.

“The best thing about him, Mama, is I know he isn’t treating me like some easy thing. He never makes me feel silly or inconsequential. He shows me how important I am through his actions, but not just that, he lets me set the tone of things, too. He doesn’t push against my boundaries or pigeonhole me in some box set aside for a girl. I know that he wants me to feel important and safe when I’m with him. And I do.”

A few nights ago, you hooked a calf over his while lying in bd. Half a dozen pillows stacked behind you supported your chest, so you wound your sweaty, just-released lower bodies together. The sex had been intense but not too rough, and he had let you cum, so your brain was half way to shutting down for a deep sleep when you turned to look at him speculatively.

“I think we should come up with pet names for each other.”

Rindou cracked one eye open from where he lounged in his own post-sex haze. “You want me to call you more pet names?”

“We should have ones just for us.”

“Here’s an idea. You can call me Sir, and I’ll call you slut, whore, cocksleeve…I’m tired but I promise to come up with some more in the morning,” Rindou yawned.

You poked him in the side, right below his ribs where his chest hair ended.

“A pet name we can use in public.”

“I’m more than happy to call you a slut in public.”

“A cute one! Like…I’m thinking I could call you…Tanuki-chan,” you said.

Just like that you felt the full weight of Rindou’s attention as he rolled onto his side to stare you down. Rindou exclusively operated on one of two modes: inscrutable stoicism or searing intensity. As he weighed his new nickname, his observation carried the weight of the universe.

“Tanuki-chan?”

“Yes, I thought it fit because of the dark circles under your eye and your two-toned hair. Plus, it’s just cute!” you explained.

Rindou sighed, “Fine, but if you call me Tanuki-chan instead of Sir while we’re fucking, I’ll belt you.”

“Oh, good to know,” you murmured, like you just might try it. Rindou cursed under his breath, rolling over to serve you his back. The thick trapezius muscles there flexed, and a stirring lust rose in you that shouldn’t have been possible so soon after you last took him inside you. “Don’t go to sleep! You have to give me a nickname, too!’

No response came and soon after, you heard his grumbling snores. Only a little piqued, you followed him into sleep.

The next morning, you scrubbed your toothbrush – a second bought just to live on the sink in Rindou’s apartment – against the overnight scum on your teeth, when Rindou entered the bathroom, wrapped two arms around your waist and whispered in your ear.

“Good morning, Mozu-Mozu.”

Peppermint fluoride slipped precariously down your throat as you struggle to respond through a mouth full of toothpaste. “Where’d that come from?”

“You wanted a pet name, right? Well, I thought about it all night. Since you made me a tanuki, I wanted to go with an animal for you, too, and I couldn’t stop thinking you would be a bird because I love waking up to that beautiful voice in my ear. So, what better than the hundred songs bird?” Rindou said.

You spit in the sink.

“You stayed up all night thinking about that?”

“I took my time with it. Wanted to choose the right one.”

True to his word, Rindou slips Mozu into your texts and softer moments now, caressing the word with his tongue like it’s something sinful and secret just for your ears. No man has ever taken you half as seriously.

Your mother has nothing to worry about. Nothing.

--

Bicycles meander past the shop fronts barely faster than the pedestrians who lazily stroll the street. Shopping in Ginza is intimidating on a student’s budget. The names of the high-end brands fall clumsily off your tongue. Even the Japanese ones taste like a different language.

Hair hastily thrown back with a tie and sneakers tattered from stomping the streets on many a rainy day, you know you stand out in the boutique lingerie shop. The women manning the front of the store appear airbrushed. Poreless and unfairly tall, they tower in watch at the front of the store like Cerberus guarding the gates of Hades.

Akane – one of your closest university friends – flings yet another bra onto the pile in your waiting arms. You asked Akane to join you, yes, but the plan was simply to make a return and then visit the bookstore, not play her personal shopper as she tries on a hundred bras she could never hope to afford.

The lingerie set in your bag consists of a sheer teddy, bite-sized thong, and bra with crisscrossing straps all in the most delicate crème colors. When you wear the outfit, you look like a virginal sacrifice, all contradictions and enticement. But, the bra digs into your chest and leaves ugly red marks in its wake, so you decided to return it.

Rindou has gifted you more than a dozen similarly priced and fine outfits at this point. The gifts make you nervous as you were taught to never trust a man who trades in love for money, but you do trust in Rindou’s eyes when he sees you in a chosen negligee or strip of leather. Trust that these gifts are a treat for him, turning you into a feast for the eyes, rather than an attempt to own you with his wealth.

“Would I look cute in this, you think?” Akane questions, holding up a corset top and matching panties.

“Anyone would look good in that. You’d shouldn’t try it on though. Better not to know how good you would have looked in it,” you say.

“I could spoil myself just this once,” Akane wheedles, like any underwear, no matter how sexy, could be worth a full week’s worth of wages.”

Set on leaving your friend to her bad decisions, you mindlessly scroll Twitter, liking any post that remotely catches your eye. The jangle of the bell announces new customers entering the store. You hope the gorgeous shop attendants might stop staring you down if there are other customers to assist.

“Hey, isn’t that Rindou? Rindou!” Akane calls out, bumping you in the side. “Wait, but who is that?”

Excitement and exasperation compete as you turn to follow Akane’s pointing finger, figuring if Rindou is in a lingerie shop, it is to buy you yet another unnecessary pantie set. He looks particularly debonair, dressed for the office, in a turquoise three-piece suit and matching vest. The color sets off the garish purple of his hair nicely. He looks like the kind of man who can afford to shop in stores like this.

So too does the woman at his side.

Both of them notice you at the same time, following the call of Akane’s voice in the quiet store. Rindou wears a neutral mask, revealing no particular care in running into you out and about on a Wednesday afternoon. The woman at his side, on the other hand, looks genuinely interested.

You scan her up and down. The graceful arc of her body drops to an ironed skirt and towering high heels, everything obviously designer or at least expensively made. She wears her hair in a chignon that would take you an hour to get right, which frames a delicate neck. Tasteful makeup on an already beautiful face completes her daunting impression.

Unsure what to think of Rindou’s appearance with such a beautiful, far more sophisticated woman, you wave. Rindou barely reacts causing your stomach to flip over. Twice.

“Oh, wow, she’s really pretty,” Akane whispers.

“Are you good to try on this stuff alone? I’m going to go return this,” you say, shoving the stack of hangers at your friend. She doesn’t argue at all, eyes glued to the other woman.

As you approach, Rindou whispers something in the other woman’s ear. You watch eagle-eyed at the way his mouth nears her skin, how his breath dislodges a loose tendril of hair. They don’t touch, but their bodies are too close as they commune. Then, the woman struts off to browse a section of the store you already know contains high-end fetish wear.

Rindou turns his attention to you only when the other woman leaves his side. His face is blank.

“Hey, I um, didn’t expect to run into you here,” you greet him. Normally, you would kiss his cheek, nuzzle into his neck, unable to stand any physical space after time apart, but now you keep your distance. Rindou doesn’t reach for you either.

“Yeah, you don’t normally shop here,” Rindou says, voice low. His eyes scan over your head like he’s looking for something, or maybe he’s just avoiding looking at you.

“I just came here to make a return. That set with the teddy doesn’t fit. But then, Akane insisted on shopping around, so I’m keeping her company until she’s ready to leave. I keep telling her she can’t afford this place, but you know Akane,” you explain.

“You’ll have to tell me how it turns out later,” Rindou says.

“Right, yeah, and you’ll have to tell me about your friend.”

You deserve awards for the even tone you manage as you circle the question, like it isn’t driving you crazy to wonder why your lover is in a lingerie shop with an attractive woman. You can feign casual; you’ve done it before with other men. Granted, you didn’t love those men like you love Rindou, but your muscle memory is good as you affect perfect nonchalance, hand on your hip and reassuring smile on your face.

Or, more likely, you radiate awkwardness, but at least that’s better than jealousy and suspicion.

“Not much to tell,” Rindou shrugs, and you wish he would stop speaking before the next words even leave his mouth. “She’s one of the subs I’ve done scene work with for the last few years. She moved to Kobe, but she’s back in town for a bit, so I promised to spoil her for the day.”

“Spoil her? What does that entail?”

“Listen, I’ll call you tomorrow. It’s rude to keep her waiting, and you should go back to Akane,” Rindou says, and the clear dismissal of what you’re feeling somehow hurts worse than the awful, fantastical images that dance through your mind: Rindou zipping this woman into a naughty maid’s outfit, Rindou spanking her in the dressing room, Rindou kissing her with those red lips that should be yours.

“Cool.”

As you return to Akane, who does not argue at all when you insist you leave immediately, return completely forgotten, you don’t feel remotely cool. Not. At. All.

--

Over winter break, you and your university friends drank shochu until you reached a spectacular level of drunkenness. You swore lifelong loyalty to one another, crying at how thankful you were that fate tied you together in the same major. Somehow, a dirty napkin became the site of an official friendship contract that included provisions for favors. Things like, a friend must assist in helping one of the others move apartments given a week’s notice, or a friend must always pick up a fellow friend from the airport. More importantly, it included a clause instituting that all prior commitments short of finals and family funerals must be dropped if an emergency friend meeting is called.

Now definitely constitutes an emergency.

Two hours after Rindou blows you off in Ginza, you snuggle up beside all your friends on the couch in Akane’s apartment, tipsy on wine coolers and completely losing your mind.

“I say you just break up with him. He’s no good for you,” Naoto says for the dozenth time since he’s arrived.

“You should have seen her! She was freaking gorgeous, like I’d have wanted to hang her picture on my wall as a kid gorgeous,” you moan.

“I disagree. You are ten times cuter,” Akane lies.

“Cute? Cute?”

You stuff your face into a throw pillow and scream. All your friends trade concerned glances. Unsure what to do, they settle on pushing another wine cooler your way. You guzzle until your throat burns on the acidic drink.

“I think we’re jumping to conclusions, and you should give him a chance to explain. He said he was spoiling his ex-girlfriend, and yes, that does sound like he meant to buy her underwear, but that doesn’t mean he wants to see her in it! Maybe she has blackmail material on him. Or, maybe they broke up because he sees her as a sister? You should wait for him to explain tomorrow,” one of your friends, Tsumugi, offers.

Himeka, another friend, scoffs uncharitably. “No man buys underwear for a woman unless he intends to see her in it. Let’s get real. He’s a dog. I can’t believe I liked that cheater! I gave him half my scone at brunch!”

You skipped over the background info about doms and subs when regaling your friends with the story. You told them instead that the other woman was an ex-girlfriend rather than a scene partner. Much like you skated around the truth of your relationship with Rindou all this time.

“I mean, it’s not technically cheating,” you admit ruefully. “We never said we were exclusive. In fact, we basically said the opposite when we first started dating. I just thought…it’s been almost six months! Six months of seeing him like five days a week. How does he even have time to see other people? I sure don’t!”

“He probably doesn’t! Like you said, when would he even find the time? He probably just met up with this woman because of nostalgia or pity, and he’s going to realize he made a mistake and come crawling back. For sure,” Tsumugi says.

“Then, why hasn’t he texted? He knows the impression he left on her. He should be blowing up her phone right now. Besides, husbands find ways to cheat on their wives all the time, and they live together,” Himeka, ever the pessimist, insists.

“Akane, what do you think?” you ask, turning big, pleading eyes towards the only witness of today’s incident.

“I mean…it doesn’t look…good,” Akane stutters, face beet red as she delivers the death knell to your heart. “But like you said, you aren’t official. So, if you have a problem with him seeing other people, you should communicate that. I wouldn’t trust any guy to stick to one woman if he’s not even asked to. For all he knows, you’ve been seeing all kinds of university guys behind his back, too. So, you should communicate with him, and see what he says.”

“I wouldn’t need a woman to ask,” Naoto mutters. As the only guy in the room, he is tasked with bearing the burden of men everywhere.

The tick tock of the wall clock in Akane’s kitchen sounds like a countdown to your personal misery. Rindou promised to call tomorrow, and the anticipation blurs into anxiety. Tomorrow may well be the end of your relationship, and you don’t think you could bear that. But in the same vein, Akane could be right, so you should wish time brought your reconciliation even sooner.

You bite your fingernails as you think through your options.

“What do we even know about this guy? He knows everything about you, but he keeps you at arm’s length from his life. You’ve never met his friends or work colleagues, except for his brother that one time. For all you know he could have a harem of women all over Tokyo. And, you have to admit, he looks fishy. The neck tattoo? The money? The hair? He isn’t some upstanding citizen,” Naoto says heatedly.

“See, that’s your problem, Naoto,” Tsumugi says. “You’re a police officer now. You can’t go around with these discriminatory attitudes assuming anyone who dares to dress like an individual is a bad guy. I honestly expected more from you.”

The two argue back and forth for a few minutes, but their words don’t reach you. A self-defense mechanism slides into place. It empties your brain, protects you from any thoughts that may churn your guts. The wine coolers are doing a good enough job of that already.

“Enough! Nobody cares,” Himeka lectures them before turning to you with solemn eyes. “If you talk to him tomorrow, and he says, yes, I am seeing other women, and I’m going to keep seeing other women. There’s nothing you can do about it. What are you going to do?”

You want to evade the question, but Himeka’s narrow eyes follow yours, and stop you from fading into nothingness. It’s a good question, which is what makes it so uniquely cruel.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t have to break up if he is. I mean, you were okay not being exclusive before,” Akane points out.

“Wouldn’t that make me, I don’t know, pathetic?”

“It would only make you pathetic if you let him sleep around with as many women as he wants while you wait for him to call like a good little housewife. I say go out and have some fun of your own. You are young and smart and beautiful, and guys are going to line up to take you out. So, why not let them? That way, you’re even,” Akane advises.

The idea of someone else’s touching your body with foreign hands makes you shudder. Yet, Rindou shows no signs of the same revulsion. He can stomach a woman’s hand wandering down his chest, tracing his thighs, palming his cock, and who knows what else? Maybe he even lets them sleep in his apartment, curled up like true lovers, like the two of you. The thought sours the sweet wine in your mouth.

“We’re getting ahead of ourselves. I just…need to talk to him. Yeah, I’ll communicate with him, and I’m sure everything will just work itself out. No reason to worry.”

Looking around the circle of sympathetic faces, not a single one of your friends looks like they believe it. And neither do you.

A/N: So be honest guys...am I completely evil?

“In order to induce the process of decay, water is necessary. I think that, in the case of women, men are water.” – Natsuo Kirino, Grotesque

“Is it not because women are so trusting that they are constantly being deceived by men?” – Natsume Sōseki, Kokoro

[asgardian--angels]

I've been seeing a lot of mixed emotions and frustration surrounding what we heard today from Samba on Wee John Wondays, regarding the immense amount of deleted scenes, cut material, original episode concepts etc, from season 2. And I just wanted to give my two cents here.

Look, it is absolutely valid to be pissed at HBO Max right now. They slashed OFMD's budget, cut their runtime on a per episode and a season basis. This resulted in plotlines having to be reworked, character & relationship development compressed, and some minutiae & connective scenes omitted. The thought of that sucks! It would have been nice to see the polycule shown more directly onscreen, and to see Ed & Stede dance, have a longer goodbye to Izzy, and maybe work through Ed and Stede's relationship rollercoaster a little more gradually. I'm sure this hurt no one more than David himself, who's had a clear vision of all three seasons from the start - who's now had to deal with not only a truncated s2 but a cancellation soon after to boot.

But I think it does a great disservice to the entire cast and crew who worked immensely hard on season 2 to dwell overlong on what we could or 'should' have gotten. They worked their asses off to bring us something phenomenal! Season 2 was incredible - and your mileage may vary, but all analytics indicate season 2 was even more popular and well-received than season 1 by audiences and critics alike. There was a whole team of writers who worked deftly and skillfully to crunch ten episodes into eight without compromising the core elements, themes, and plotlines they wanted to include to tell this story, plus a talented cast who brought their own improvisation to set every day and gave us some of the season's most iconic moments. Everyone on the OFMD crew is proud of what they made, as they rightly should be. It was beautiful television.

Expressing dissatisfaction with what was cut is fine to an extent, but let's not let it take away from our enjoyment and appreciation of the final product we did get, or give the crew the impression that what they worked so hard to give us wasn't good enough. They want more than anyone to have had those extra scenes in there to show off the hard work of the whole team! I'm seeing this a lot especially with the talk about the early draft of Calypso's birthday (and this info is not new, Samba spoke at length about it during his baking class back in November). Regardless of your opinion on whether you think that would have been a 'better' version of the episode, it was just that - an early draft, that never came close to being filmed. David and the writers revised this concept because, apart from time constraints on the season, ultimately they felt that the concept they ended up going with best served the narrative. Even Samba agreed that he preferred the final version. There's no secret footage of this other version, we didn't 'lose' anything - this is one of the dangers of scripts getting released for any piece of media, because the mind runs astray dreaming of the possibilities of what may have been, when the reality is all shows go through moderate to sometimes heavy editing before the final version, and the audience probably doesn't need to see that process!

The fact that season 2 turned out so beautifully, with some of the most moving and iconic sequences television's seen in quite a while, and a love story that has touched so many, is truly a testament to the passion, dedication, and skill of the entire cast and crew. They have achieved the status of cultural phenomenon, season 2 was the 5th most watched series in the entire world on streaming services, outperforming shows like Loki. They've got several dozen articles with glowing praise from major media outlets, a 95% on Rotten Tomatoes, multiple award nominations, and more than anything a loyal fanbase who's in it for the long haul to fight for a season 3. They have succeeded to this level despite all the stumbling blocks HBO Max has thrown in their path. If season 2 was OFMD held back from its full potential, then I think they should be damn fucking proud of what they've made.

Samba pitched an official bts documentary for both season 1 and season 2 and was turned down. This show deserved better than HBO Max was ever going to give them. He's going to try and post deleted scenes and a blooper reel if he can (not all heroes wear capes, folks). And it's very likely none of these things will ever be officially released (though, we can make a stink about it!). Be angry about it, absolutely. But we need to channel that energy into the fight for renewal. Double down on efforts to get the attention of Netflix, Prime, Apple TV, and FX, get more signatures on the petition (87k as of this writing!), and just keep talking positively about the show on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook with our hashtags. We need to show the crew that we're upset for them, but so grateful for the beautiful season we got too.

So let's not bicker and wallow about what was 'stolen' from us - the final canon product is ultimately the final canon product, and any other tidbits are fun but neither owed nor necessary. They trusted that we could put the pieces together, that we'd be able to read between the lines when scenes that would have made things more explicit, or developed them further, had to be shortened or cut. And that trust was well placed! We sussed it out. Celebrate the ofmd fandom for all the excellent meta, art, fic, we've gotten, and celebrate season 2 for its joy, its profoundness, its nuance, its enduring hope and how much it's given to so many. Air your grievances respectfully, and then get back to fighting to give OFMD the well-funded third season it deserves!

[woozysioux]

ahh ty for the tag @littlemiss-stardust i love this one <3 and we had a few similar ones, great minds think alike lololol

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