#graham coxon imagine

[so-much-for-stardust6]

Sauna- Damon Albarn

-

-

-

summary: you and your boyfriend have sex in a sauna.

lowercase intened & not proof read

warnings: smut

a/n: this was requested by @hazelllllllllllllllll thank you so much and so sorry it took long to get it out! 🫶 i apologize if it’s feels rushed or short 😭

-

-

-

-

i thank damon everyday for convincing us to build a sauna in our backyard. every time i get stressed (which is nearly all the time), i always go in there to relax. and today was one of those days. i had a tough day at work and much needed sauna break was the way to relax. i wrapped a towel around my naked body and walked over to the building. damon wasn’t home, he was at the studio talking music with the rest of his band mates. he also had a surround system installed into the sauna so we could wind down with music as well. i set the temperature perfectly and turned on my music, a smile instantly on my face. i sat down and just stayed there with my eyes closed.

“there you are, darlin.” his voice startled me.

i jump in my seat and look at him. he was wearing a white towel around his waist. i gulp as certain thoughts enter my brain.

“hey baby. you’re home so early.”

“yeah, i wasn’t feeling the best so we called it a day.” he went to sit next to me.

“you’re sick?” i instantly worry.

“oh no, just not feeling the best music wise.”

“you need a message?”

i always give damon a massage when he’s stressed about music or in a music block, it always ends up easing him. he smiled brightly and shook his head. he turned around and my fingertips touched his dewey skin. already seeing him in only a towel already made me feeling a certain way, and now i’m giving his a massage in the sauna.

“i always love how your hands feel..” he practically moans out.

i bite my lip and kept my mouth shut. i watched as i dug my fingers into his skin.

“fuck…” i softly mutter to myself.

“what’s that, love?” he turns around to face me.

“nothing.” i quickly say.

“you feeling okay? you look a bit flustered.” he smirked.

as soon as i saw his smirk i knew i was done for. but i still lied.

“yeah, i’m feeling great. it’s just this sauna i’m not used to.”

he gave me a certain look, a look telling me he can see through my white lie.

“gimme a kiss.” he puckered up his lips.

i knew it was a trap to kickstart something. i hesitate but i eventually lean in. i went in for a quick peck but he quickly escalated everything by shoving his tongue in my mouth. i moan out from the feeling and move closer to him. he held onto my face and deepened the kiss.

“take it off..” he mumbled against my lips.

i slowly stood up and grabbed the hem of my towel where it’s wrapped up. i mentally thank myself for deciding to go naked as i open my towel and drop it. his blue eyes scanned my figure, his chest rising quickly as his dick gets hard. i notice the little bump from his erection in the towel, a slight smile appeared on my face.

“doesn’t take much, huh?” i motion to his problem.

“i mean you’re naked.” he shrugged.

he stood up and unwrapped his towel. his dick sprung out and was already leaking precum.

“come ride me, love..” his voice deep.

i go to sit on his lap, his dick resting perfectly on the one spot i want him. we go back to our previous makeout and i start to roll my hips. he grabbed onto my hips and gripped them hard.

“fuck..you’re killing me..” he moaned.

i grab onto his shoulders for a better angle and continue my teasing movements.

“no more teasing..please..” he breaths out.

i giggle to myself at how fast he folded. i pushed myself up and grabbed his dick, aligning it with my hole. i look at him once last time, taking in his beauty. i’m always so astonished by his absolute beauty, his perfection 100%. i slowly started to sink myself down onto him, the feeling of him stretching me out making me moan softly. he also moaned, closing his eyes and dropping his head back.

“fuck…you feel so good..” he groaned out.

his hands slowly started to guide my hips, rolling them to create fiction. the heat from the sauna was making it easier for me to sweat. he speeds up my movements, eventually lifting me up to bounce on him. he met me halfway and thrusted his hips up, the sauna filling with the sound of skin slapping. i moaned out at every thrust, my boobs bouncing up and down. i wrap my arms around damon to bring him closer to me. i connect our lips once again, red and plump from our previous makeout. our chests touched as i rode him, our sweat slick skin rubbing against one another. i pulled the hair on the back of his head, making him moan out. i furrow my eyebrows as i feel a rising feeling in my stomach, his tip hitting my g-spot enhancing it. one of his hands left my hip and started to make its way towards one of my boobs, squeezing it a bit. i moan into his mouth which allowed him to sneak his tongue in. he played with my nipple, pinching and pulling it. i clenched around him at the feeling.

“i’m close, love..” he mumbles against my lips.

i only breathe out and nod my head, bouncing faster. i continue moaning out loud, digging my fingernails into his skin. damon pulled away from my lips and pressed kisses down my neck all the way to my boob. he didn’t hesitate to take my nipple in his mouth, sucking on it and occasionally nipping it. the pleasure became all too much, the spring in my stomach tightened to the max.

“d-damon…i-“ i cut myself off with a moan.

damon just hummed around me, giving me permission to cum. i let out one last breath before i squeezed my eyes shut, arching my back as i came all over him. my nails continued to dig into his skin, probably drawing blood. damon stared up at my from my boob, his blue eyes watching me cum. i gasped and cried out as i continued to cum, clenching around him. watching and feeling me cum sent damon over the edge, his cum spewing inside me. he rested his forehead against my chest as he moaned, gripping tightly onto my hips to slowly guide them. i collapsed against him to try and catch my breath.

“you did so good, love. so so good..” he left kisses all over my body.

he kissed behind my ear, my shoulder, and behind my neck.

“i love you, dames.” i mumbled.

“i love you too, darlin.”

he pulled me away from him to look at my face. he wiped the stray hairs off my face and pressed a sweet kiss to my lips.

“you’re so beautiful, like always. i’m so lucky.” his eyes scan my face, lighting up brightly.

“oh shush.” i blush and try to turn away but he softly grabs my face.

he kisses my cheeks, my cheekbones, my forehead, my nose and my lips again.

“let’s get cleaned up, love.” he slowly lifted me up from him.

i groaned from the soreness as he sat my down. he stood up and grabbed a spare towel from near the door. he bent down and spread my legs apart, mouth slightly falling apart when he saw his cum leaking out of me. he looked back up at me before carefully cleaning me up. he cleverly pushed his cum back inside of me, making me chuckle and pet his head. he stood up and cleaned himself before discarding the dirty towel in the corner.

“thank you, baby.” i pucker my lips for another kiss.

he gladly accepts it but cheekily tried to deepen it into something more.

“nope, nice try.” i pull away and laugh.

“doesn’t hurt to try.”

he grabbed his towel and wiped my sweaty body off before wrapping it around his waist, he then grabbed mine. i wobbly stood up and leaned against him for support as he wrapped mine around.

“grab onto me.”

i did what he said before he picked me up bridal style. i yelped out from the action and giggle. he walks to the door and i open it for him.

“wait! we need to turn it off.”

“eh i’ll come back when i put you down.” he shrugs.

he makes his way back into the house and we might’ve had another round.

[stxrshxpxd]

“you taste so good”

pairing: 90s damon albarn x reader

warnings: halloween fic. smut featuring blood!!!

word count: 2k

promt: damon and reader grew up together in the same small town. now they're in their twenties and have come back for a class reunion party, but something about damon is very different.

The moon stared back at me in threefold through the reflection in the window to my left. She was half full and a deep yellow hanging just above the horizon. Next to her was the vague outline of Damon’s body in dark colours. We were wandering down the street I used to walk every morning to get to school. It amazed me to think that I had felt just about every possible emotion of mine on this very street. The town was quiet tonight and even though almost every house was lit from inside all the light around us felt dim and couldn’t compete with the sheen of the moon.

“Don’t you think it’s cold?” I asked Damon to my right as he walked through the chilly October night in nothing but jeans and a loose long sleeve. I focused my gaze on the crescent of his face illuminated by the moonlight, and noticed, for a fragment of a second, that his right eye gleamed in a peculiar way. It was like a tiny flash that came and went within the space of my heartbeat. It puzzled me but Damon absently shook his head and shrugged.

“I’m okay.”

We kept passing spots where we had played and hung out as kids, but they all seemed strangely eerie now. I suppose that was to be expected though, walking through your hometown at night in the middle of autumn. But Damon was strangely eerie as well. I hadn’t seen him since we were nineteen and we were now pushing twenty-six. Naturally a person might change in that time span but I could’ve never expected Damon to grow up to be so quiet and sombre.

As we reached the end of the street, faint music began to crawl into our quiet space. Its source was the reason we had come back home; for a reunion party with a bunch of our old school mates. It seemed the party was already in full bloom and it was nearing midnight.

As we approached the house we entered a sphere of stronger light and I automatically turned to look at Damon again. I was insatiably amazed at his face having adulted considerably since I last saw him, his cheeks hollowed out slightly and his jaw and cheekbones more prominent. His hair was longer and darker and fell in stripy lines down his forehead, and there was a short but even stubble gracing the lower part of his pale face. The better half of our teen years I had had feelings for him on and off and it was all coming back to me quite quickly, despite it not really feeling like it was the same person walking beside me.

I went to speak but was interrupted by a loud shriek that made me inhale and swallow my sentence in a gasp. Turning my head to the front door I was met with another old friend; Tanya. Tightly gripping two wine glasses in her hands, she tiptoed out onto the driveway in just her socks, and emptied her chestful of excited giggles in my ear as she engulfed me in a tight hug.

“Y/N, it’s been a lifetime! Gosh!”

“A six year long lifetime!” I gushed along with her and she kept laughing and hopping around on the spot, trying to stay up on the balls of her feet.

“Why are you so late? What were you and Damon doing in the bushes?” Tanya taunted and I rolled my eyes with a smile as she gave Damon a big hug too. He hugged her back with one arm and gave her a calm smile.

“God, I didn’t think it was possible you’d get even more handsome. I had almost wished you’d go downhill after graduation,” Tanya sighed excessively with a stroke of his emaciated cheek. She flashed me a playful grin and wink and then dragged us both inside. I couldn’t help but feel a tinge of jealousy coming over me at the sight of her caressing his face, but soon it was suppressed when I met all the familiar faces inside.

I spent about half an hour just hugging people and telling the story of what I’m up to nowadays a hundred times over, as well as getting drinks shoved into my hands. They were going down easy and after my second tequila shot with old footballer dreamboat William Bailey, I had just spotted Damon again. He was standing on the other end of the room with a beer in his hand and looking straight at me. He didn’t appear especially fazed but I felt a strong, odd feeling of jealousy, and even possessiveness, coming off him. It felt like there was an invisible rope tightly wound between us across the room. I laughed gently at his grave expression and waved him over while filling another shot glass to the brim.

Damon somehow walked slowly but was at my side in less than a second. I ignored the weird feeling that had settled in my stomach and blamed it on the alcohol, as I forced the shot up to his lips and he allowed me to pour it down his throat. With not one bit of flinching he swallowed and looked down at me with a leering smirk and half-lidded eyes.

“I missed you a lot, Y/N,” he said nearly under his breath, yet I could hear it clearly over the loud music. The longer I stared into his oceanic eyes the less of the party I heard and saw, and the harder it became to look away. I thought for a second that peculiar gleam in his eyes was back but it had vanished again by the next time I blinked.

“I’ve missed you too,” I responded in a small voice.

He tucked a wayward strand of my hair behind my ear and let his hand linger by the side of my face. I wanted to lay my cheek in his palm and let him hold the weight of my head as I kept staring into his eyes, but I refrained. I wondered if there had been something funny in one of my drinks, as I felt like I was entering some sort of trance when Damon stepped closer to me. I asked myself if I was breathing still and had to force a deep inhale. Then I held my breath because Damon had closed his eyes and I couldn’t help but do the same as I felt his lips interlock with mine.

“Y/N,” his silky voice echoed in my head despite him not taking a second to disconnect from my lips. In fact he caught my bottom one between his teeth and bit hard, making me gasp and causing my insides to flutter. I was nearly pulled out of my trancelike state at the sudden pain and faint metallic taste spreading in my mouth, but then my name rolled off his tongue again.

“Mm,” I hummed, eyes still drunkenly closed and balance thrown off in the safety of his arms.

“Let’s get out of here,” Damon whispered in my ear and the whisper seemingly multiplied as it did laps around my brain. I soothingly sucked on my bruised bottom lip and nodded, opening my tired eyes to find his lustful ones.

He led me out of the party slowly, our hands interlocked between his back and my front. A short meander through the house later we were outside again and I didn’t say anything for a long while as he led me down the street. Crossing the lawn opposite the church, I realised where he was heading, and before I knew it he had pushed my back against a cold metal pole in the heart of the local playground. I couldn’t tell you how many times Damon and I had sat on the swings behind me in our teens, and how many times I had dreamed about him forcing his tongue into my mouth like he was doing now. It felt like I had lived half a life after getting out of our hometown and I thought I had gotten past everything that was here, but feeling Damon’s hands harshly kneading the flesh of my sides I felt about sixteen again.

Damon responded to my small moans with groans of his own as he pressed his body against mine and grinded his clothed semi into me. I threw a few anxious glances at the houses all around us to see if there was anyone watching us where we stood in the sea of light from the scattered streetlights. Quickly my attention was stolen by Damon again, him clamping my lower lip between his sharp teeth. He did it harder than I might’ve wished for but it got mixed up in my brain with the pleasure of his hand having found its way between my legs now, and I decided that I liked it.

As his lips moved on down to my neck the pain caught up with me and so did the taste of blood. I sucked on my wounded lip and swallowed my own blood, yet for some reason I was still moaning ecstatically. It was beginning to feel like I wasn’t controlling my own body. Another sharp pain exploded from my neck and spread through my body in an instant, but I heard myself beg for more before Damon had even pulled his teeth out of my raw skin. I thought his teeth looked sharper than normal, but then again my mind was a complete haze.

“You have such beautiful skin, Y/N,” he whispered hoarsely and glanced up at me with his gleaming eyes. No matter how many times I blinked they didn’t go back to normal now. And my blood rested on his lips and down his chin. His hand dug inside my trousers instead and his freezing fingers quickly resumed circling my hot wetness.

I couldn’t tell if the growing feeling in my stomach was me about to pass out, or throw up, or if I was reaching my orgasm. I forced my eyes open when I felt him grab my hand and kiss down my forearm towards my palm. A few sticky, deep red kisses later he sunk his teeth into my palm as well and my stomach turned. My core was on fire with the feeling of my high building and my hand and arm ached as Damon kissed my bleeding wound, lapping up my blood. I couldn’t take my eyes off him nursing my shaking hand, and then suddenly I couldn’t keep from screwing my eyes shut when my high flooded my body. Shaking and whimpering, I began to feel lightheaded and the tiny stars that I had seen on the insides of my eyelids faded quickly. Everything turned black and I felt like I deflated, and all I could hear was Damon’s low voice.

“You taste so good.”

[killersfool]

heyyyy can ppl send me oneshot requests!!! i've been reading through old ones and none have really sparked a good idea so if it's detailed and a bit different or specific it will deffo inspire me more. i'll write anything of inhaler boys/blur(graham or damon or gramon)/derek shepherd or patrick dempsey himself/evan peters(any ahs character of his)/patrick zweig/bridgerton guys/jesse pinkman/paul mescal/pedro pascal/dev patel/the walking dead(rick grimes, negan, daryl)/gilbert blythe/jacob slater/carmy berzatto/richie jerimovich/sydcarmy/leo woodall(dexter mayhew)/mandalorian/ cassian andor/mr darcy/marauders (sirius, wolfstar, james potter, regulus, remus)

sorry for the fat list i love so many shows and people

[unearthmyburiedheart]

"I Want This So Much"

Pairing: Graham Coxon x Female Reader I imagined 1999, 2000, or 2001 era Graham as I wrote this fan fic, but feel free to imagine any Gra era you'd like! Word Count: 4,479 Warnings: No warnings, except this fan fic is EXTREMELY smutty and involves period sex. Brief mentions of blood and other bodily fluids. Prompt: No real prompt, just an idea I've had for a while! Period sex with Graham. That's about it! Note: This fan fic is the first one I've written in ages and ages and ages and I am quite nervous to post it. Please be kind! It's a very unserious exercise and I wrote it purely for my own entertainment and enjoyment, but I ultimately decided to share it on tumblr despite feeling really shy and anxious. Writing this sexy fan fic gave me a lot of joy and I hope you all like it! Lots of love! ***

I suddenly wake up from a deep sleep and feel intense pain shooting through my abdomen, lower back, and thighs.  My foggy brain registers period cramps.  Thoroughly exhausted, I quietly groan and lightly shift my weight on Graham’s bed.  It’s almost pitch black in Graham’s room, save for the moonlight filtering in through his bedroom window.  It’s completely silent, aside from the rain tapping on the window and Graham’s soft breathing as he sleeps soundly next to me.  I shift my weight again and glance at his sleeping figure under the covers.  His back is facing me and his hair is disheveled.  I watch his body gently rise and fall and I fight the urge to run my fingers across his bare shoulders.

I shift my weight a third time and reach for Graham’s bedside table in the darkness.  I contemplate turning on his bedside lamp, but I don’t want to disturb his sleep.  Another wave of period cramps shoots through the lower half of my body and I wince as I grasp my water bottle.  I sit up on my elbows and take several small sips of water.  I force myself to roll out of bed and stand up.  I suddenly feel lightheaded and my legs shake as another wave of pain hits me.  My water bottle still in hand, I slowly walk several paces to the end of Graham’s bed and feel in the dark for my duffel bag.  I carefully make my way into Graham’s bathroom and when I step onto the cool tile, close the door behind me, turn on the light and drop my bag, I lightly gasp at what I see.  My period has definitely started, and in the most dramatic and messy way possible.  My underwear and thighs are heavily smeared in blood and I sigh in frustration. 

I immediately peel my bloody underwear from my body and rummage in my bag for a clean pair.  I put in a tampon, clean my legs, and pull on a pair of sweatpants.  After taking several tablets of pain medicine and drinking deeply from my water bottle, I step back into Graham’s bedroom.  I notice his bedside lamp is on and he’s propping himself up on his elbows to look at me.  Squinting at me with a curious expression, he studies my face as I walk back to his bed.  Graham obviously wasn’t sleeping as deeply as I thought he was.    

“Why are you awake?” he asks groggily.  “I rolled over and reached for you, but you weren’t there.” 

I bury myself under the covers, turn off his bedside light, and move my body towards him.  “Really bad period cramps,” I say softly.  I feel him move his body close to mine in return.  He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into him, nuzzling our noses together as he presses his forehead into mine.

“Oh,” he whispers.  “I’m sorry.  Do you need anything?” 

“No,” I answer, and I curl myself into him.  His body is so warm.  I breathe slowly for a while.  The pain is awful, but not unusual for the first day of my period, and I know I just have to wait for the medicine to take effect.  Graham holds me in silence.  I whimper as another wave of pain hits my lower back and he kisses my cheeks as I say “owww” several times in a row. 

I reposition myself and turn over so my back faces him.  His chest now pressed against my back, he gently moves my hair and kisses the back of my neck.  I sigh happily as his warm hands first reach under the back of my shirt and then reach under the waistband of my sweatpants.  He gently touches my waist.  He moves his warm hands across my abdomen and lower back as he attempts to soothe me with his touch.  He always does this when I struggle with period cramps and I bite my bottom lip in contentment.

“Do you want the heating pad?” he asks, but I shake my head. 

“No,” I answer quietly.  “The medicine will kick in soon.  Your hands feel nice.” 

He kisses the back of my neck again and holds me in silence as I wait for the pain to recede.  As the pain disappears, I feel myself falling into a deep sleep.  Graham kisses the back of my neck several times before gently pulling his body away from mine.  In a matter of seconds, sleep pulls us under. ***

The following morning is cloudy.  Rain steadily patters against Graham’s bedroom window.  His room is exceptionally cozy.  I open my eyes, register the comforting sound of rain, and roll over onto my back.  I prop myself up on my elbows and immediately feel the dull pain of continued period cramps.  The pain has significantly lessened, but a minor ache spreads throughout my lower back and I force myself to stand up, stretch, and take additional pain medicine.

I hear Graham’s voice coming from the kitchen.  I smile as I hear him softly singing to himself.  I hear the whistling of a teapot, the clattering of utensils, and I bite my lip to prevent myself from laughing when I hear him sharply curse.

“Fuck,” he says loudly, and just a few moments later he’s walking back to his room holding two steaming mugs.  His eyes light up when he sees me. 

“What happened?” I laugh, and he smiles and shakes his head. 

“I accidentally slammed my fucking finger in the silverware drawer,” he says, handing me a steaming mug of hot chocolate.  I see he made himself a cup of tea.  He kisses me good morning, motions for us to sit on his bed, and we bury ourselves under the covers as we happily sip our drinks.

“Thank you for making this for me,” I say, taking a long drink from my mug. 

“You’re welcome,” he answers.  I flush as he leans over to kiss me deeply again.  We sit in silence for several minutes as we finish our drinks and listen to the rain.  It’s so peaceful.  Graham collects our empty mugs and places them on his bedside table.  My period pain has almost completely disappeared and I feel so content.  Graham looks at me and begins gently stroking the back of my right hand.  His fingers tenderly moving up the back of my hand, across my wrist, and up to my elbow, then back down again.  I break out in goosebumps at his touch.

“How are you feeling this morning?” he asks.

“Better,” I answer.  “My cramps are almost gone.” 

He nods and his concerned expression turns to one of relief and contentment.  We sit in silence for several moments and I enjoy the pleasurable feeling of his fingers moving against my skin.  Graham shifts his weight on his bed and suddenly rolls his body on top of mine.  I smile and laugh as he pulls a funny face and settles his body weight on top of me. 

“Am I hurting you?” he asks.  “Are you uncomfortable?”

“Not at all,” I answer, and I laugh as he contorts his face into another ridiculous expression.  I playfully slap his bare shoulders and he laughs in return.  He looks into my eyes for several long moments and his gaze is so loving and full of want that I’m forced to break his eye contact.  Even after all this time, the intimacy is sometimes too much to bear.  His hands find my hair, my hands find his hair, and we’re kissing so deeply and passionately until I have to pull away to take a breath.  Our cheeks flushed and our gazes locked, he tells me he wants me.  I bite my lip and smile and am just about to kiss him again when a thought flashes through my mind.      

“Are you sure?” I ask.  “You want to now?  I don’t want to stain your sheets.” 

He laughs warmly and averts his eyes to a spot just beside me on his bed.  “I think you already did,” he says smiling, his dark eyes moving between my body and a massive smear of dried blood on his sheets.  He leans back to allow me to sit up slightly and glance at the spot of blood on his bed.  I’d somehow completely missed this spot until now.  I flush with minor embarrassment.

“Fuck, Graham, I’m so sorry – “ I start, but he immediately cuts me off.

“I don’t care at all,” he says, laughing warmly again, his eyes looking into mine.  “It doesn’t matter at all.  The stain will come out or it won’t.  I’m actually surprised it hasn’t happened before, seeing as we’ve done this so many times…” 

He trails off, his brown eyes slightly glinting, and I look back at him and laugh, my embarrassment forgotten.  He leans his body weight down onto me again, my fingers intertwining into his messy hair, and I close my eyes as he places light, fluttering kisses across my neck.  I lightly gasp as his mouth covers every inch of skin across my neck.  I run my hands across the back of his neck and shoulders as he deepens his kisses into my skin.  I run my fingers through his hair and gently pull as his tongue runs across my skin and his mouth sucks on my earlobe.  His warm breath against my skin; his kissing still so deep and tender; his hands running through my hair as I grip his hair; and I let out a small moan as his tongue dances across me again. 

I pull harder at his hair and he makes a small noise in return.  I bite my lip and smile when I hear the noise; he is so perfect and so beautiful.  “Graham,” I breathe, “this feels really nice.”  He slows his kisses, then comes to a pause as he looks at me, his mouth red and swollen.

“I want this so much,” I say, and another small noise escapes his throat indicating that he wholeheartedly agrees.  He kisses me deeply for several long moments and I feel his tongue push into my mouth.  I open my mouth to receive him and we’re softly moaning as our mouths work steadily together.  Our mouths moving perfectly together, I’m forced to break away and gasp for just a moment when I feel his hands slide under my t-shirt and envelop my breasts.  

His touch is confident, but gentle; firm, but tender, and I close my eyes and lose myself as his hands work against me.  I lift my arms above my head and he swiftly removes my shirt.  I breathe harder when he replaces his hands with his mouth and tongue.  His tongue now dancing across my chest and his face buried into one breast and then the other, kissing, sucking, and nipping at my skin.  I pull his hair again as his mouth sucks on my right nipple.  More than anything, though, I love listening to the noises he makes as his mouth works against me.  He moans into my chest several times; his moans muffled, but passionate, and I can’t stand it, it sends my mind spiraling. 

“That feels so good,” I pant, already feeling like I’m losing myself.  My mind clouds with pleasure at his touch and I lean heavily into these feelings.  He removes his mouth from my left nipple and looks up at me, a small smile on his lips.  He immediately returns his mouth to my breasts, then moves his mouth up slowly, tortuously across my neck, then down to my breasts again, and then even lower as he maneuvers his body down in order for his mouth to cross my stomach.  He isn’t moving downwards fast enough and it is becoming difficult to bear.  His lips graze my stomach ever so slightly and I whimper as I feel his fingertips dance between my skin and the waistband of my sweatpants.  I start to squirm under his touch. 

I let out a sharp gasp and buck my hips as he quickly pulls my sweatpants and underwear off in one sudden motion.  My clothing now discarded on the floor, I see him smirk and I know he is dragging it out on purpose.  I pull his hair as he plants kisses all over my stomach and waist. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, looking up at me and I smile in return.  He positions himself in front of my legs and I sigh when I feel his hands run up and down my closed thighs.  He gently kisses my knees several times and tightly squeezes my thighs.  Gripping my thighs and gazing directly into my eyes, he commands, “open your legs for me.” 

I flush at this request and feeling his hands still gripping my thighs, I part my legs and make a small noise as his eyes move across my body.  I’m panting now, my hands gripping the comforter and my eyes closed, I’m leaning into the heady anticipation and it’s unbelievably thrilling. 

“Look at me,” he says, and I open my eyes to stare directly into his.  It’s overwhelming because he refuses to break eye contact, even when his fingers reach down to touch my tampon string.  Neither one of us refusing or daring to break such intense eye contact, we stare at each other as he wraps his fingers around my tampon string and gently pulls my tampon out of my body.  I whimper again and bite my lip as I feel him pull it out of me.  Without missing a beat, he wraps my tampon in several tissues, tosses it in the wastebasket next to his bed, and lowers himself between my open thighs.  He pulls a sharp intake of breath.  He says my name several times, but his voice is so choked with arousal and want that I barely register his words.      

He begins kissing all across my stomach, waist, and inner thighs; no patch of skin remains uncovered by his mouth.  He sucks, nips, and kisses all across my inner thighs, teasing me as much as I can stand.  Butterflies dance in my stomach with anticipation and eagerness.  “Fuck,” I moan quietly as I feel his tongue drag across my inner thighs.  My hips slightly buck again in anticipation. 

His fingers gently trace me, becoming smeared with my blood and arousal, and move up and down the length of me before gently parting me.  He taps my hips, indicating that he wants me to raise them, and then I feel his hands slide under me and squeeze my backside.  I moan at the contact.  His hands work against my backside for a few moments as I try to steady my raised hips, but his mouth and tongue begin moving against me in earnest and soon I am riding waves of pleasure that erase everything else from my mind.  I moan loudly several times; it feels so unbelievably good.  I feel him repeatedly push his tongue inside of me and I bite my wrist to prevent myself from screaming.  

My mind sees white and the feelings he’s giving me are so overwhelming that I almost cry out in protest when he pauses for a brief moment and removes his hands from my backside.  He grips my thighs to steady me, pulls his tongue out from inside of me, and eagerly kisses and sucks on my inner thighs. 

“You sound so beautiful, so perfect.  You sound fucking amazing,” he says.  “I want to hear you, don’t stop making noise.”  I open my eyes, look into his, and feel my cheeks flush. 

“How does it feel?” he asks, smirking slightly because he already knows the answer.  Seeing his mouth, chin, and nose smeared with my blood makes all of this a million times more arousing.    

“Really fucking good,” I say.  “Please don’t stop.” 

A low hum of satisfaction escapes his throat.  His eye lids heavy, he lowers himself again.  I gasp and push my hips forward at the renewed contact.  His arms and hands snugly wrapped around my thighs, he buries his face into my body, echoing my moans back to me as I grow closer and closer to a release.  I’m not thinking anymore and he isn’t holding back.  My heart swells with arousal and affection as my hips fall into a rhythm against his mouth.  I feel his fingers massage my center and I moan in pleasure and surprise. 

“Graham,” I choke out as my brain sees static.  Every nerve feels on fire.  I feel his tongue tightly circle my center once, twice, three times, then as his mouth applies additional pressure and he sucks on me, sparks set off in my brain and pleasure rushes through my entire body.  I can’t even begin to form words, I just grip his hair and attempt to steady my shaking legs as I feel his mouth drink me down and his tongue move in and around me.  My head thrown back, moaning and breathing hard, gripping his hair, and his face buried into my body, I couldn’t believe this was happening. 

His mouth works in and around me for several incredible moments and he lightly kisses everywhere he can find as my breathing slows and the pleasure recedes.  We lay together; my breathing slowing down and my eyes closed, his head resting on my stomach that gently rises and falls.  Our hands now intertwined as he plants gentle kisses and leaves small smears of blood all across my waist and abdomen.  No words are spoken for several minutes.  He eventually pulls himself up, settles his weight on top of me again, and touches my chin to look into my face.  He kisses me deeply several times before pulling away and asking, “do you want to keep going?”

“Yes,” I breathe.  “I don’t want to stop.”

He nods, kisses me again, and swiftly pulls out a small tube of lubrication and a box of condoms from his bedside table.  He shifts his body weight off me and stands next to his bed.  He opens his tube of lubrication, applies it generously across his fingers on his right hand, and then positions himself back onto his bed.  Kneeling in front of my open legs, he gathers additional lube and applies it against me.  Propping myself up on my elbows and staring into his face with a slightly amused expression, I ask, “do you really think we’ll need all of that?”

He laughs and shakes his head.  “Probably not,” he says, “but I want you to be comfortable.”

“Are you ready?” he asks, as he slowly parts me again and moves his fingers through me.  Desire floods through me again; I want him so badly.  “Yes,” I gasp, as he gently taps my center.  I nod eagerly; my back slightly arches and my hips push towards him, silently begging him to continue.  He slowly and carefully inserts his middle finger into me.  I bit my bottom lip and moan at the contact.  His finger slides in easily and my body doesn’t resist.  I hear him pant and moan slightly as he moves and arches his finger inside of me, my hips involuntarily buck again as he hits something inside of me.

I grip the comforter and moan at the sensation.  “It feels so good, Graham” I say.  He does this for quite a while, his finger repeatedly hitting something deep inside of me that makes me cry out.  “Want to try another one?” he asks, his voice deep, low, and intensely focused, but I peek at his face and his expression is completely consumed with arousal and desire.  “God, yes,” I say, and I gasp as his index finger slides in easily next to his middle finger.  He pulls both fingers out, then back in, then out, then in again at a steady pace, which he increases slightly as my moans and gasps become louder and more frequent.  His fingers push just a little harder and my hips buck at the sensation when I feel the fingers on his left hand massage my center at the same time.  I arch my back and move my hips in rhythm with his hands; I know I’m losing myself.

I hear him breathing hard, panting, and moaning as his hands work over my body.  I flush deeply as I feel a second orgasm building up within me.  I somehow flush even deeper and moan loudly as I hear him moan and say – partly to himself and partly to me, his voice full of amazement – “you’re so fucking wet for me.  You feel so good.”  A warm sensation of pleasure rushes through me at his words.  “Graham,” I say, panting heavily and practically begging, “I’m so close.”  Suddenly, he pauses his movements entirely and I allow my back to fall onto the bed in frustration.  I groan loudly.  “What the fuck?” I practically shout, and he laughs as I run my hands over my face in mock annoyance.   

He reaches for the lubrication again, removes his fingers from me, and applies additional lubrication to his right hand and across my entrance.  “Ready?” he asks again, his tone slightly cocky, and I groaned yes in answer.  With excruciating and deliberate slowness, he inserts his middle finger into me, then his index finger, and finally his ring finger on his right hand is inside of me and I moan at the sensation of his touch.  He resumes massaging my center and moving his fingers in and out of me.  My body works in sync with his hands and the same desperate noises I made earlier return. 

“That feels so good, that feels so good, that feels so good,” I repeat as pleasure careens toward me.  My hips buck up, my thighs shake, and my brain sees static as pleasure engulfs my consciousness.  I continue to moan as his fingers work inside of me, easing me down from my orgasm, until he gently pulls his fingers from me one at a time and collapses his body weight on top of me as his mouth finds mine. 

“Graham, Graham, Graham,” I repeat over and over again between deep kisses.  He pauses our kissing for a moment, looks into my eyes and says, “open your mouth.”  He raises his right hand and brings his fingers to my mouth.  I grip his wrist and eagerly suck on his index, middle, and ring fingers, tasting and swallowing my own arousal and blood.  Small, quiet moans escape his throat as he watches my mouth and tongue move across his fingers.  Our eyes locked together, we don’t dare break eye contact as my mouth moves to suck on his thumb.  Moaning around his fingers, I finally release his thumb from my mouth with a pop and he shakes his head in bewilderment, stands up, quickly removes his jeans and boxers, and reaches for his box of condoms.  He’s fully naked now, aside from a thin silver chain around his neck.  We hold eye contact for several long moments as I watch him carefully unwrap and delicately roll on a condom.

He climbs back on top of me and holds me close to him for several moments.  He wraps me in his arms and buries his face into my neck before planting light kisses all across my jawline and chin.  I wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist.  I know that I never want to let him go.  We breathe together for several wonderful moments, our breathing synching together as our chests rise and fall.  He whispers my name and I glance up at him.  We kiss deeply and passionately for a few moments until he pauses, presses his forehead against mine, and asks again if I am ready.  I say yes.  A shuddering, unrestrained moan leaves his mouth as he slowly pushes himself into me and he breathes heavily into my neck.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he whispers, attempting to control himself.  “You feel so good.”

He kisses me, presses his forehead against mine again, and speeds up his movements, my hips working to match his rhythm.  Watching him fall apart because of my body was sheer ecstasy.  His breathing quickens, he moans tight in his throat, then moans louder and more frequently.  His eyes close in concentration and focus, his cheeks flush as his hands grip the comforter for support.  I roll my hips up into him again and I beg in a choked whisper, “more, Graham, more.  Deeper, please.”  He does, and he moans loudly as he finds a new speed and force that suits us both.  He's panting heavily now, moaning repeatedly, and I can tell he’s close.  It’s always amazing to me how well we find a rhythm together.  Breaths and moans exchange back and forth, I know I won’t have another orgasm, but being this close to him always makes me feel so unbelievably happy.  He loses himself entirely and can’t hold himself back: he pulls out and pushes back inside of me one, two, three times before his body shakes and he collapses onto me.

Time passes – although we’re hardly aware of it – and we lay together.  Our breaths slowing and our mouths softly kissing, we talk and whisper to each other for several wonderful, peaceful minutes.  He slowly pulls himself from me, stands up, and stretches.  He runs his hands through his unbelievably messy hair and I laugh at his expression.  His cheeks are flushed a deep crimson, his silver chain necklace is twisted and backwards on his neck, and his sweaty brown hair sticks up at odd angles. 

“What are you laughing at?” he asks.  He squints at me and sticks his tongue out.  “You don’t look much better.  Clean yourself up,” he jokes.  “You look like you just had sex.”  I laugh again.  He sees my eyes wander toward his bathroom door. 

“Wanna shower with me?” he asks, holding out his hand.  I bite my lip and smile, grab his hand, and he swiftly picks me up.  My arms slung over his broad shoulders and my legs wrapped around his slender waist, he won’t stop contorting his face into ridiculous and hilarious expressions.  I squirm with laughter but his strong arms hold me tight against him.  Happiness and laughter flood through our bodies as he walks us into his bathroom and gently sets me down on the counter.  He starts the shower and warm steam immediately fills the room and fogs the mirror.

“After you,” he motions, pulling his shower curtain back.  I hop off the counter, close his bathroom door, and pull him into the shower with me.  Soon, we’re laughing, playfully pushing against each other, and holding each other close as we lose ourselves completely.  Time always seems to stand still when I’m with Graham.  It’s perfection.

[roomeight]

Transcript of the 1996 Loveline episode with Blur when Graham Coxon makes a joke about raping a 16-year-old. Thank you to @kattdotter for the audio clip. (Source)

Female caller (Shanti): I have a problem. I'm 16 and I'm going out with this guy, but I'm sleeping with his brother.

Adam Corolla: How old is he?

Caller: The guy I'm sleeping with or the guy I'm going (dating) with?

Adam: Both of them.

Caller: The guy I'm going with is 16, the guy I'm going with is 17.

Adam: So you're going with one guy, but sleeping with his brother?

Band member (Dave?): So you're not sleeping with the first one?

Adam: Aw, that's a doubly whammy isn't it? I mean, isn't it? Can you imagine? Cause not only is she having sex with someone else, but you're not getting any.

Alex or Dave(?): I know, what if he finds out? And how annoyed he's gonna be?

Adam: it's gonna be horrible. But why are you doing this?

Caller: Because he's not ready. My boyfriend's not ready but his brother's willing to do it. There's no commitment.

Adam: His brother sounds like a hell of a guy, bailing you two out that way. A young couple in need—he'll lend his penis to the cause. What a guy!

Dave: He'll call him [undiscernable dialogue] balls.

Adam: What do you mean, is he saying he's not ready?

Caller: Yes.

Adam: You are trying to have sex with this 16-year-old boy?

Caller: Yes.

Adam: He is saying, 'I'm not ready to have this sex,' and his brother is stepping in and saying, 'oh hold on a minute wait don't pull your pants up.'

Caller: Yeah, sort of.

Adam: Are you planning on telling him?

Caller: Not soon.

Adam: Well what do you want to do?

Caller: I don't know!

Adam (turning to Blur): Alright, what do you guys want her to do? What do you want to do?

Graham: I'd rape him.

Adam: You'd rape the 16 year old who's not ready for sex?

Graham: Yep.

Some band member: She's cheating—

Adam: What kind of hell sound advice is that? You wouldn't rape him, I mean you personally if you were Shanti (caller).

Graham: Ehm, I don't know what I'd do.

Adam: Would you tell?

Graham: I'd move to another state.

Adam: (to Graham) Would you tell, would you tell the brother then?

Graham: Yeah, I'd let them have a good fight over me.

- Loveline w/Blur, 1996 (audio clip)

[greensparty]

Album Review: Dhani Harrison / Paul McCartney and Wings

This week I got to review an anniversary reissue from a solo Beatle and I got to review a new album from someone with Beatle DNA.

Dhani Harrison INNERSTANDING

I wish more people knew what a powerhouse phenom Dhani Harrison is! I wish people talked about him the way they talked about Jack Antonoff. He has done some fantastic work with the band Thenewno2 (I named their album Thefearofmissingout one of my Best Albums of 2012), as part of the super group Fistful of Mercy, and he has done a ton of movie soundtrack composition too. But in 2017 he released his first solo album with IN//PARALLEL (read my review here). In October 2023, his first album in six years INNERSTANDING was released digitally. This week it is getting a physical release from H.O.T. Records/BMG.

album cover and yellow vinyl

I'm going to address the elephant in the room: Dhani is the son of George Harrison. He was involved in the completion of his father’s album Brainwashed (released posthumously in 2002), was a featured performer at the Concert for George in 2002 and the George Fest in 2014 and he also helped develop The Beatles: Rock Band video game. In recent years he and his mother Olivia have also run the Dark Horse Records record label, founded by his father, and they have released albums by the likes of Billy Idol and Joe Strummer. I bring this up because that is what a lot of the attention for Dhani has been about. Any child of a much-loved musician has had to live up to their parent’s musicianship, just ask Jakob Dylan, Wolfgang Van Halen or Jason Bonham, all of whom are great musicians on their own, but had to live up to their legendary parents, which set the bar so unrealistically high. With the musical offspring of The Beatles, one can argue that you can hear their parent's sound in their music, i.e. John Lennon's influence on Sean Lennon's sound. With Dhani, his music is entirely different than George's music. It's easy to NOT compare his music to his dad.

With the first solo album, it felt like Dhani had really come into his own as a songwriter from Thenewno2. Here, it feels more grandiose and bigger in his musical approach. There's some collaborators on the album including Graham Coxon of Blur, Liela Moss of The Duke Spirit, and Mereki. There is a heavy influence from Trent Reznor and Peter Gabriel, especially on songs like "New Religion" or "Damn That Frequency". But he kind of defies a lot of genres and brings multiple styles in, sometimes within the same song. It's exciting to see Dhani emerging as not just a powerhouse phenom, but a studio production whiz!

For info on INNERSTANDING

4 out of 5 stars

Paul McCartney and Wings Band on the Run 50th Anniversary Edition

Originally released on December 5, 1973 (in the U.S.),  the third album from Wings and the fifth album Paul McCartney released since The Beatles’ 1970 breakup was released. It is considered by many to be among the best of the Beatle solo albums, up there with John Lennon’s Imagine and George Harrison’s All Things Must Pass. I'd say this is probably his best non-Beatle album he released in his impressive discography. To celebrate the 50th anniversary (this year marks 51, but it's close enough to December 2023, so who cares, right?), the album was released last week by UMe in a special edition.

original album cover

The timing of this album is coming a few months after the passing of Wings guitarist Denny Laine and this edition serves as a reminder of what an asset he was to McCartney's 1970s albums. When I interviewed Mr. Laine in 2019, I asked him what his favorite Wings album was and he said "With Band on the Run, it was just me and Paul doing the music and then Linda did some harmonies…but yeah, that’s really the one that sticks out is Band on the Run." Fully agreed! When I saw Laine at City Winery in Jan. 2019, he played the Band on the Run album in its entirety. What a treat to hear him tell loads of stories about each song.

50th anniversary double CD edition

The album itself is noteworthy for the number of Sir Paul standards: "Band on the Run", "Jet", "Let Me Roll It", the list goes on. When I saw Sir Paul at Fenway Park in June 2022, he did some of the hits off the album. There's been various versions of this album but in 2010, I got the Paul McCartney Archive Collection version, which contained bonus tracks and a bonus DVD (the Best Buy edition). That one was awesome and sounded great. With this new edition, CD1 is the original album remastered. CD2 is "Underdubbed" mixes of the songs. According to the press release, Paul said:

“This is Band on the Run in a way you’ve never heard before. When you are making a song and putting on additional parts, like an extra guitar, that’s an overdub. Well, this version of the album is the opposite, underdubbed.”

While it is interesting to hear versions of the songs pre-final mix, for those of us who know the final songs so well, it can feel like an unfinished and incomplete version of the song. I like the 2010 edition of the album better, but this one has its moments.

For info on Band on the Run

Original album: 5 out of 5 stars

50th Anniversary Edition: 3.5 out of 5 stars

[betweendevilanddeepbluesea]

I love you so much Mark Stoermer (don't be jealous Guy Berryman 😘), make me a flan or whatever with your milky way! 😜 It gives me a lot of tenderness, straight to my heart ❤️, when Mark Stoermer says that the songs and music albums he made are his experiments (just like me with my fanfics and my crappy editing of videos and photos 😑); even though they are experiments of his your music is great, now imagine if it wasn't an experiment anymore but something serious 🤓 Brandon Flowers, let Mark write some songs on the next upcoming album The killers, or at least let Mark have a lead in a song The killers as Graham Coxon did with Coffee & Tv. And my dear Mark failed to say, "¡Hago esto para divertirme!" 😜

[ssupersonicc]

bee’s masterlist 🐝

♡ ao3 | ♡ my other blog

♡ please note: most of my fics are nsfw, so please read with caution.

♡ asks are open for nsfw blurbs like those linked below! :)

* - indicates sexual content

♡ Graham Coxon —

please, dear -

gra fingers dear y/n in front of a mirror to show her how utterly delectable she looks when she cums. *

thunder in your ear -

gra decides to tease y/n underneath the table cloth, though she soon has him whimpering with his cock in her hand - just hoping none of their friends get an inkling as to what they’re up to. *

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

♡ Liam Gallagher —

highly commendable -

liam has y/n begging him to use his mouth on her, though he can’t resist teasing the poor birdie. *

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

♡ Damon Albarn —

like a virgin -

damon has y/n on his lap to tell him what she wants him to do to her — though she’s far more clueless than he had expected. he’s willing to change that. *

sometimes -

poor damon can’t help but to settle between y/n’s thighs — so eager to please her with his mouth. *

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

[merrumeru]

Let me cheer you up even more: Graham!90 x reader

Words: 1870

Warning: nope, zero

The room was dark. The only light that could enter the room was the glow of the stars and of the tiny moon in the night sky. I was surrounded by silence as the last song on the vinyl record ended twenty minutes early. I had no desire or humor to get out of bed and change it. I focused on my slow and deep breathing. It was supposed to help me calm down, but it didn't work for me. My eyes were fixed on a distant point in the sky. I felt as if I was sinking into my anxiety. But I couldn't understand why. My life was going in quiet rhythm, I had a roof over my head and someone who cared for me. However, the thought of the future made me panic. Looking at friends who knew what they wanted to do in life, at Graham and his thriving career…I was stalled. I couldn't find a place for myself or this one thing that would be my passion. Graham always said that everything is fine with me, that I will somehow put my life in order. That he, my age, was also feeling lost. Still, the thought of working or continuing my studies scared my in the deep of heart. If I can't see my future myself, so does it even exist? I covered myself with the duvet. From head to toe, as if I was going to disappear. I promised Graham I would wait for him tonight. We'll watch a movie and eat something good. But suddenly I lost my desire for anything. I wanted to fall asleep and wake up in a much better mood. I suspected it was almost 10pm and Graham would be back from the band rehearsal soon. 

I heard the key in the door twist. The hit of his backpack on the ground and the sound of shoes being taken off. „Love I’m back”. The mellow voice of Graham sounded so happy. But I was about to ruin it all. On the one hand, I wanted to tell him how hopeless I felt, on the other hand, I preferred not to put stress on him at home. I didn't want to be a sad part of his life, I was supposed to help and encourage him. Graham was more delicate than I was and much more concerned about everything. I didn’t want the negative emotions and stress which he felt through a lack of privacy and high expectations soaking into his heart also in our home. So I pretended to be asleep.

I heard him slowly approaching the bed. He probably didn't expect to find me sleeping. I heard his soft laugh. „Y/N why you always decide to miss the best fun. Okay. I'll put the food in the fridge and lie down too.” 

„I’m awake”. I turned to face him. It was dark enough in the room that I could only see his silhouette.  

„Did something happened?” I heard his voice suddenly turn serious. I knew that he suddenly felt tensed, as if I was about to say that some kind of disaster had happened. I was silent for a moment, not knowing what to say. „You are sick? Did something unpleasant happen to you at university? Sorry to be late, but you didn't call so I thought everything …”

„No! No Graham, everything is ok. I’m just tired” I stopped in the middle of a sentence, a lump that appeared in my throat blocked all words. „You will be angry if we put our romantic evening in another evening, or day, or  whatever?”

„Hey, who do you think I am. Of course it's not a problem baby.” I felt the bed on his side slowly bend under the weight of his body. Graham put his hand on my head and lightly stroked my hair. „I'm just worried. You've been sad for a while and I don't know how to help you.” I stretched my hand toward him and squeezed his hands tightly. „Your voice is so weak, yet your grip is still hard”.The moonlight illuminated his face and a shy smile. His thumb gently caressed the back of my hand.

„Nothing happens. I've just had bad days lately. You know, life is too much to handle for me sometimes.” 

„You can always tell me about anything Y/N. I don't want you to feel lonely in difficult times.” Graham released my hand. He took off his hoodie and tossed it next to the bed. After a moment, he was lying next to me, pressing me tightly to his chest. „God, why are you so emotionally unavailable. Will you ever stop being a mystery to me?” He placed a few kisses on my hair. I put one leg on his hip and gripped his T-shirt tighter. I wanted to blend in with his skin.

„I love you so much Graham. I don't know how to express it all.” His heart was beating fast. He radiated a warmth that I missed so much. I could wear a hundred sweaters, be surrounded by several heaters while sitting on one of the sunny beaches, and nothing would warm my heart and hands more than his inner warmth. 

„You don't have to show it or look for ways to express it. Just trust me and let me understand you.” His hand rested on my bare thigh, which I got on his hip.He used his finger to paint little circles. I brought my mouth close to his and kissed him softly. One sloppy stroke of the lips, but right after that a second time, much deeper and passionately.

He pulled me towards him so that I was suddenly on top of him. Our lips hardly detached.I felt hotter and hotter, as if all the accumulated emotions had suddenly burst forth and like a wave and found their way out. I felt dizzy, all my bad thoughts disappeared like clouds after the storm. Graham's hands got under my shirt and rested on my bare back. I opened my eyes and broke off the kiss. I straightened up, staring deeply into his eyes. Graham lowered his hands to my hips and gripped them tightly.

„You have such a handsome face, bastard. We both started laughing. „Handsome, talented… you are made to be star.” I pinched his cheek that he grimaced slightly, small lines forming on his nose.„And these crowds of female fans undressing you with their eyes.”

„I'm just looking for the eyes of one girl in this crowd. And I don't have to undress her with my sight. She does it by herself when we are at our home.” Graham straightened his glasses and rose to his elbows.”I just hope that she listen carefully to my words and will follow them. After all, with me, she doesn't have to be afraid of anything.”

He tucked a few locks of hair behind my ear and placed a hand against my cheek. My head rested on it. „Y/N just take it all easy. You are good enough at what you do right now. Life is not only about challenges. Sometimes there are occasions that come by themselves. Whatever it may be, I will try to be always by your side.” I wanted to cry and didn’t know if it was more of sadness or pure happiness and peace that overwhelmed me. 

“When did you get so mature? Two years ago, you wouldn't have been giving me such deep advice, just trying to make me laugh or whatever. Where's my baby boy gone?”  I smiled at the memories of the beginning of our relationship.  Even though Graham is three years older than me, I have always had the tendency to mother him. His delicacy combined with shyness and frequent confusion made me place my whole heart in his hands. I loved watching him do what he loves and his hard work was paying off.

“You have a great influence on me. I doubt if I could mentally handle this without you.” Graham's eyes were on me as I got up from the bed.”Where are you going love?”

“You don't even know how much I feel like having tea.” I stretched gently because my whole body was asleep and put on his hoodie that was lying on the floor. ”I'll do one for you too. You can easily go take a shower. When I'll come back, let's stay in bed, we've been doing it much too rarely lately”. 

Graham chuckled and get up without one word. Before I left the room,I looked out of the corner of my eye as he took off his shirt. I bit my lower lip. His body was lean, not very muscular. It pained me that he couldn't see how handsome he was. His broad-shouldered silhouette, bathed in the darkness of the night, made me want to approach him, hug him tightly and kiss his back. Graham turned to face me and tossed the shirt in his hand at me. „Don’t peek! You were supposed to make tea hmmm?”

„Oh c’mon mr.She Coxon. I won't give you back this shirt.” 

„Just like my hoodie?” I saw him shift the weight from one leg to the other and cross his arms over his chest. 

„What is this slander towards me, Coxon?” I stuck my tongue out at him and, without waiting for an answer, disappeared into the darkness of the hall.

When I returned with two cups, Graham was waiting for me. The room was lit now by a single lamp in the corner of the room. His hair was still wet, he was wearing sweatpants but still no shirt. The towel hung loosely around his neck.  Graham flicked through the vinyl records, humming some tunes. Eventually he settled on one and put it in the adapter. I put the tea on the bedside table and lay down, trying to guess what music was about to start playing.

Graham positioned himself between my legs so that his head rested on my stomach.I gently stroked his thick, still wet hair. "God, I don't know how I'll survive these two months without you Y / N”. His hands wrapped around my torso.”Fucking hell”.

“You can always lie like this with Damon.” Graham turned his head abruptly, his chin gently digging into my stomach.

“This is a bloody bad idea. Where do you get such strange ideas from”

“I am not the one who has a deep male friendship. Straight fact, baby. I watched a program once about people in the jungle and they did weird things ...” I ran my finger down his nose.

“What the fuck, I won't be in jungle, in fact we even won't be in village. We're not going to a survival camp.” 

“You never know Graham. What if the plane will stuck on a desert island, or the bus will be unable to leave the forest?”

“Maybe let's not go that far. Let's go back to why I'm going to miss you, your body, your words and just being here.” Graham pulled himself to meet my lips.

“But the the-...”

“It won't get the legs and come out by itself. Let me cheer you up even more.”

[lensinski]

blur: no distance left to run is a bit of a mess but worth it for the emotional moments and the image of graham coxon spending an entire day hiding in a zoo because he saw damon albarn and jamie hewlett there and desperatly tried to avoid bumping into them after the breakup

[stopeatingwhales]

football hysteria x damon albarn

I LOVED THIS SM LMAO !!!!!!!! football obsessed damon is so cute

Pairing: 90s damon albarn x reader

Warnings: noneeee

Word count: 2.281

Requested by anon <3

༉‧₊˚✧

"Who you supporting?" Graham asked me, handing me a beer as he sat himself beside me on the couch next to me in the middle, Damon sat on the opposing side. Damon had dragged me over to Graham's house to watch the Man City and Chelsea game tonight, and knowing just how competitive Damon came to football, I knew it was better that I simply went along with things rather than moan about how much I really didn't want to spend two hours watching two teams pass around a ball for entertainment.

"Erm, Man City." I replied, quickly flicking the can open to taste the bittersweet barley flavouring of the heineken beer as it embellished the walls of my mouth.

"You don't support Chelsea?" Damon questioned, his eyebrows furrowed.

A small chuckle left my mouth. “Of course I don't, they're shit." I sneered, aware of the havoc that my statement was going to cause. Immediately, Damon's mouth fell agape; stunned by my malevolence, as well as partial shock from the new-found information surrounding my opinions on football.

Graham's laughter rang through the room and my ears as my eyes continued to burn into Damon's piercing gaze, him just as amused as I was. Nobody was as big a football fan as Damon had become. "They're anything but shit," he continued, eyebrows now raised as he scoffed. "You're telling me that you support Man City? Gallagher-brother-Man-City?"

"Okay I'm going to sit between you both,'' Graham announced, swiftly standing up, shoving my body to the side he had just accompanied, placing his body between me and Damon, a blockade to prevent either of us going at each other's throats. "Just so we can all be alive by the end of it."

“Well I wouldn't have fucking invited her over if I knew she supported those manic twats, Graham."

"Piss right off Damon, we're in Graham's flat, not yours." I bit back, completely unphased by his childlike behaviour. It had been made quite apparent to the media that Chelsea were indeed the band dominated by the south, as well as Blur, and Man City were celebrated in the north by Oasis. However, it was quite comical noticing the immediate flush of anger that filled Damon's face after my sly comment. Leaning back into the loveseat, my back adorned the soft feel of the cushion behind me. "Graham, who do you support?" I asked, curiosity laced in my words as the football pitch came into view on the television screen - initiating the beginning of the match.

My eyes were focused on Graham as I watched him toss his glasses onto the coffee table in front of us, which had been cascading with countless bags of crisps and other treats to keep us stuffed as the ninety-minute match played through. "In all honesty, I'm not that phased with football," he began, reaching over to open a bag of crisps. "It's Damon here who's completely obsessed with it."

As the match began, tensions were already built to a high degree between the three of us. Small but meaningless comments had been thrown into the atmosphere of the apartment, merely portraying our silliness and how neither of us had seemingly outgrown the competitive side of our personalities, something that would be more apparent during teenage years. Unfortunately however, very early into the game, Damon's supporting team had decided to skillfully snatch the ball from one of the players, eventually managing to get it into the goal - portraying the first goal scored subsequent to the game's start.

Damon instantaneously rose at the goal, shouting loud enough for the neighbours to hear every single word that rumbled out of his throat. "Told you we were bett-" he said, smugness intertwined between his words so effortlessly, though shamefully his words had been cut off by the sound of the cushion, once placed behind me, now hitting his face. I couldn't help but allow a tiny smirk to illustrate itself on my facial features as I admired his face dripping in absolute bewilderment towards my actions. “What the fuck was that for?” he scoffed, falling back into his side of the sofa, as I sustained the grin on my face, watching him. The atmosphere that was once overflowing with hostility was now completely serenaded with Damon's egocentric giggles, forcing my body to hunch into a sulk at how quickly my team had been warranting for a loss so early into the match.

Mid-way through the game, Graham had decided to go to the corner shop by his apartment to get more beers for us to share, due to us having run out to share between the three of us. I dreaded being alone in the room with the game ongoing with Damon present, full-well knowing that his upbeat jolliness would attempt to torment me upon the fact that he was winning, which, to my demise, was exactly what had occured. The air fell still in the room once the sound of the door slamming etched through the flat walls, my gaze focused entirely on the match following on the screen, attempting to focus my mind on anything but the room that I was currently occupied in - though my peripheral noticed Damon's head almost instantly turned to look in my direction once it was made evident that Graham wasn’t inside the flat anymore. As if reading my mind, he decided to shift his body weight, which was once adorned to the other armrest of the burgundy couch, right next to me, where he attempted to wrap his arm around my shoulders, warming me into an embrace. In spite of this, I could feel his intense stare on my features. Using all my strength to avoid connecting eyes with him, I wasn’t going to admit defeat so easily, my stubbornness proving a point.

Once Damon realised, he carried on watching the game, however his body had continued it's embrace with mine. At one point, I was thinking that the match was going to be a lost cause from the performance shown by Chelsea, However, things began to turn around, and Man City managed to score a goal, to Damon's consternation. The sudden win resulted in me lunging from my seat, swiftly detaching myself from Damon, my whole body cheering towards the goal as it replayed on the screen. What was amusing was that, after I had finished my applause, I noticed that Damon had moved back into his seat by the side of the couch, distancing himself from me. "Aw, you don't want to sit with me anymore?" I sarcastically questioned, not waiting for an answer as a small smile crept on my lips. It was very amusing, pissing Damon off. I must say, watching his ego deflate into nothing but a simple sulk at the corner of a room was really the sight.

"What did I miss?" The sound of graham's voice sounded through the room, paired with the clank of multiple beer bottles as he reached into the plastic carrier bag to place them on the table. Each and every one had an individual water-streak pattern, indicating that they had just been chilled - when they taste best.

"Man City scored!" I exclaimed, reaching out for one of the glass bottles as I got the bottle opener to unfasten it from its metal clasp, promptly taking a swig from the beverage. The intent was, of course, to provide Graham with the extra knowledge upon the events that occurred during the match whilst he was absent, however knowing myself, I had also wanted to remind Damon of said occurrences, to surge him to the edge of his frustration. Exclaiming it at the top of my lungs held just enough power to do just that.

A chuckle immediately left Graham's mouth from my enthusiasm. "Need me to sit between you both again?" He jokingly asked, yet an element of seriousness was laced between his words.

“Depends if Damon's gonna stop sulking or not.” I replied, focusing my view on the game playing on the screen.

"You're the one who was fucking throwing the cushions!" Damon shouted, reaching over to grab himself a beer.

"Because you were pissing me off!" I answered, shifting my gaze onto Damon, who was, to my surprise, staring directly at me. There was a certain look of annoyance glazed on his features, though the agitation seemed to subside as soon as we locked stares, as if he was longing for my eyes to bear their sight toward him, as if it was an examination, an analysation to confirm whether we were still on good terms or not; of course we were, while conflicting preferences drew evident tears between us during that moment in particular. After a few seconds had passed, Damon leaned back into the cushion, carrying on watching the game unfold, satisfied with his response from my eyes. Switching my gaze over to Graham, I took notice of a look of question illustrated on his features, to which I decided to mime that it was alright, in order to move myself next to Damon once again. It would've been a lie, and a mere understatement, to say that I hadn't missed his arms around me.

Bunching up next to him, enough space was made to allow graham to sit himself down next to me, though that thought was the last passing my mind; my body was shivering from nervousness, the close proximity between us, regardless of our romantic acquaintance, never failed to bloom butterflies at the pit of my stomach. Due to my body's weight pressing down onto the cushion next to him, it was obvious that he was aware that I moved to sit next to him - but at a cause of his stubbornness, him averting all his attention onto me, admiring me as if I was the only living being in the apartment, a home that hadn't even belonged to me, would never happen - it would take much more to result in his feign of irritation to melt away. Placing my arm around his shoulder, I granted my hand to reach up to his beautiful head of hair, my fingers caressing his strands gently as I brushed any parts that were sticking out on the sides of his head. His arms were wrapped around one another, like a child encompassed in an angry stupor at their parent due to them not allowing them a packet of sweets from the grocery store, though I was playing at his heartstrings, aware of just how much he adored me playing with his dirty blonde locks.

For a short sum of time, we both sat there, my hands never halting their actions. The next few minutes of the game played out of continuous dribbling and passing to other teammates, oftentimes resulting in the other team taking hold of the ball and running around with it for a while until their attempt to score. Randomly, Damon's arm had released itself from its shared embrace with the other, engulfing my body with his as he encased his left arm around my shoulders. We were in a sense of comfort with one another, though from Damon's avoidance of my stare it was made obvious that he was still in the least carrying a small element of annoyance, nevertheless, as I allowed my eyes to linger onto his delicate, paradisiacal features, holding back a grin was seen much easier said than done, a small curvature sneaking itself on his lips.

"Look who's won." Graham mumbled, his voice detaching me out of my trance that I was enamoured in.

A laugh rang itself out of my throat as I admired the lengthy team cheering as they enveloped one another in a massive embrace. "Told you they were better!" I grinned as I diverted my gaze onto Damon, the same look of frustration painted on his demeanour, still avoiding his eyes on me. "You want a kiss?" I asked, tilting my head in order to make sure I was the main thing in his sight, knowing he wouldn't be able to keep up his facade so easily. "Kiss kiss?"

I continued until his eyes met mine. It was as if, for a short segment of time we were frozen in place, momentary seconds passing of us merely marvelling at the view illustrated forth one another, my hands snaking their way around his neck as I leaned in slightly, noticing his blue orbs fall onto my lips, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip as his mind wandered through fields of appraisal. It was then where I couldn’t hold resistance for any longer, and I doubted that Damon could, bringing my head forward as I let my lips latch onto his, allowing time to flow as they lingered still before he kissed me back with gentle force, enough to notify me of his desire that encompassed him just as much as me. The kiss held innocence, portrayed adoration in its true beauty, nevertheless, also embodying eagerness, a yearning of lust.

"I'm going to be honest," I mumbled, removing my lips away from his, panting as I attempted to recollect my breath. "I don't actually support Man City."

"Of course you fucking don't." Damon laughed, our lips connecting once again as he perched his head forward, intoxicating me with the very thing that I desired most in that significant moment.

"If you're gonna shag, please go home." Graham groaned, causing our bodies to jolt at the sudden awareness that we weren’t alone together. Pulling away instantly, a wave of embarrassment covered my cheeks as we looked at one another, infatuation the single thing flowing out of our eyes.

“Sorry Graham.”

[so-much-for-stardust6]

High Sex- Graham Coxon

-

-

-

summary: graham comes back from a gig stoned and eventually get horny.

lowercase intended & not proof read

warnings: smut and drug (?) use

a/n: this was requested by @righttopop !! i haven’t written any blur in a big minute so thank you for requesting! i’m nearly done with my requests so i’ll be opening them up soon! :)

-

-

-

-

it was a late summer night and i was home alone. my boyfriend, graham, was gone for the night to play a gig with his band. i was mindlessly flipping through the tv channels while i sat on our couch just wearing a tank top and shorts. i shoved pretzels into my mouth as my eyes stayed glued to the screen. i didn’t notice the keys jingling outside our door. the door opened and my head whipped around to watch my boyfriend slowly enter the apartment, slowly closing and locking the door.

“hey love, how was the gig?”

“it was great. very great.”

he left his guitar case by the door and walked towards me. as soon as he sat down i got a big whiff of weed.

“holy fuck, graham, you smell strongly like weed.” i scrunch up my nose.

“oh uh damon gave me a joint. sorry.” he giggled.

i squinted as i looked into his eyes, visibly red.

“you’re high.”

“what? no i’m not.” he scoffs.

“mhm okay, love.” i playfully roll my eyes and stand up.

“are you hungry?” i ask him.

“starving.” he grins.

i nod and make my way towards the kitchen to fix him up something. unknown to me, graham had his eyes glued to my ass as i walked away, biting his lip at the sight. he looked down at his crotch and noticed a slight boner showing through his jeans. he palmed himself and groaned as he got even more hard, a terrible mistake he regretted. he grabbed the little pillow on the couch and placed it on his lap, hoping it wouldn’t notice. i walked back into the living room with a plate full of food, his eyes lighting up at the snack.

“thank you so much, love.” he puckers his lips for a kiss.

i obviously accept and press my lips quickly on his quickly. as soon as i pulled away, his lips following mine trying to get more. i eye his movement but chuckle to myself at them. i sit back down next to him and focus back on the tv. i heard him chomp up the food i made, slurping sounds emitting from him.

“it’s so good, love.” he mumbled as he ate.

“it sounds like it.” i chuckle.

“but it doesn’t taste as good as you.” he winks at me.

i was taken aback by his statement, freezing in place. he just continued to eat his food like nothing. i’ve only experienced graham when he was high and it was before we dated. i was friends with his band and we all hungout and got high. he did say sexual stuff and whatnot but was crazy giggly.

“you’re in a mood, gra.” i laugh.

“how can i not be when i have you.”

“love you too.” i lean over to give him a peck on his cheek but he quickly whipped his head so i kiss his lips.

he quickly escalates the kiss by deepening it, placing his hand on the back of my neck. i moan into it and let my hands roam his arms, squeezing his biceps. i heard his food fall to the ground and pull away immediately, groaning at the fact he made a mess.

“graham!” i exclaim, quickly getting up to grab paper towels.

“i-i’m sorry, love.”

“it’s okay, dear.” i smile at him.

i bend down to clean it up, not knowing his eyes were glued onto my boobs. he quietly whimpered and shoved the pillow harder down onto his crotch. i stood up and smiled at him, noticing how flustered he was. i shrugged it off and walked back into the kitchen. graham lifted up the pillow slightly and looked at his now fully erected penis, now restrained against his jeans. he whines as he grinds against the pillow to find some release. i come back in and before i can even say anything, graham goes onto his knees and starts whining out.

“y/n please baby, i want you so bad right now..please sit on my face.” he blurts out.

i stood there shocked and stared at him. i obviously noticed his boner as he begged me. i can’t lie and say i didn’t want him. i bit my lip and squeezed my thighs together. the heat didn’t help with the feeling of horniness.

“lay down.” i say.

he breathed out and immediately did, hand groping his hard dick. i let out a trembling breath as i prepared myself. graham just looked up at me with puppy dog eyes and smiled brightly, giggling in the process. i smile warmly back at him and grabbed onto the hem of my shorts. i slowly pulled them down to tease him, watching as he sucked in his bottom lip. i thankfully decided not to wear underwear today so as soon as i pulled it past my thighs i was instantly exposed.

“fuck…” he groaned out.

i kicked my shorts off and onto the floor somewhere. i got to my knees and hovered my face over his. i then go to kiss him upside down, immediately shoving my tongue into his mouth. he’s palming himself as we made out, moaning into the kiss. i pull away from the kiss, a string of saliva connecting our lips. i crawl over him and finally positioned myself above his face.

“god you’re so fucking beautiful…” he moans.

i remove his hands from his crotch and palm him. i slowly unzip his pants and struggle to pull them down a bit. he giggled as he watched me, finally helping by lifting up his hips. his dick popped out from his boxers, tip red and leaking with precum.

“i did this?” i look back at him.

“yes…” he whined, thrusting his hips up.

i spit on his dick, starting to stroke him. he squeezed his eyes shut and whined, gripping the carpet.

“you ready, baby?”

“mhm.” he whined.

i lowered myself onto him carefully, gasping out when i felt his breath. i moaned out once i fully put myself onto him. he didn’t waste any time to start eating me out. i gasped out at the feeling, stopping my hand movements on his dick. i squeezed onto his thighs and cried out, rolling my hips against his face. i look at his leaking dick in front of my face and immediately thought of something. we’ve never done it before but it’s always a first time for something. i took him into my mouth and hummed. he moaned onto me which caused me to moan around him. it was a nasty scene, laying down while 69ing. he slurped me up, my juices coating his face. i deep throated him, gagging once i get him reach the back of my throat.

his hands were on my ass, squeezing and kneading it. i felt his tongue dart in and out of me, lapping up my juices. i still grinded my hips against his face, his hands helping me guide. he shoved my hips harder down onto him, even though i was scared to suffocate him. he moaned and whined as he ate me out, his cloudy mind on overdrive. all he could focus on was the taste of me, the thought of how we looked. his fingers dug into my skin, probably going to leave bruises after. i continued to bob my head up and down, eventually leading my hand to his balls. i slightly played with them which evoked more moans from him. i felt my stomach tighten, my hands going to grip his thighs again. i pull off his dick for a second to warn him.

“gra…” was all i could mutter out.

i drop my head down and cry out as he goes faster. i muster up the strength to go back to giving him head. i went slow and sloppy, my spit falling down. i pulled off once i came all over his face. i moaned out as i rode his face, his hands pushing him down onto him harder to let all the juices in his mouth. a tear slipped from my eye and dropped down my cheek. i stopped my movements to catch a breath but went back to his dick. i deep throated him once again and he moaned against my sore core. i felt his leg start to tremble, indicating that he’s close. i hummed around him to tell him he can cum. he gripped onto my ass as he came in my mouth, coating it with his cum. i pulled off of him, watching my cum infused spit coat his dick. i swallowed the spit, lifting myself off of graham. i groaned out at my sore body as i laid down next to him. he instantly started to giggle, using his fingers to wipe up my juices and place them into his mouth. he hummed around his fingers, loving the taste.

“you’re so cute.” i smile at him.

“not as cute as you.” he cheesily smiles.

“i love you, gra.” i chuckle.

“not as much as i dooo.” he sings out.

i lean onto his chest and listen to his heartbeat.

“i’m hungry..” he whined.

“you just ate, gra.” i reference the food i made him.

“eating you out wasn’t enough.” he groaned.

“oh my god, i wasn’t talking about that.” i laughed out.

“here, let’s shower and i’ll make dinner.” i pat his chest.

“mmmm nooo.” he whined.

“i’ll help you clean up, you big baby.” i groan as i got up.

“i’m saying no cause i’ll get horny again. you’re too sexy..” he frowned.

i just chuckle at his words and help him up for our shower.

[stxrshxpxd]

🎁 fic friday;

birthday girl (part 2)

90s graham coxon x reader,, smut!!

My hands were shoved into my boyfriend’s fluffy hair as he kissed my neck and his hands teetered around the edges of my gift from him. A lingerie set in green lace.

“You can still wear them to be fair,” Graham muttered as he hungrily shoved his hands inside the panties he had just insisted be taken off. He rolled his fingertips around my clit skillfully, sending waves of pleasure through me already. I could see my heart beating hard through my chest as I peered down at Graham who was kissing down my belly now.

He seemed to not be able to make up his mind where to put his lips because he only gave my thighs a few kisses before climbing back up to my face. He gently grinded his clothed semi into me and made me moan again, my cheeks hot and heartbeat still quick.

“So beautiful,” he whispered into the kiss and I felt him roam his large hands down all the curves in my torso. At last he wrapped his arms around the hollow in my back and easily lifted me off the floor. He sat back against the bed and I ended up straddling him, beaming back at him with a giddy smirk.

”I bet this is all going according to plan, isn’t it?” I asked playfully while hurriedly undoing his jeans.

“Exactly,” he laughed, a little out of breath and some redness spread across his cheeks. I smiled sweetly at my pretty boyfriend just as I dug inside his loose jeans and intently watched his face twist in pleasure. He cursed in a breath as I ran my palm up and down his growing cock. The sound of his soft groans and the feeling of his breath hitting my face was making me increasingly impatient to feel him inside me.

I pushed his underwear down and mine to the side and we both seemed to hold our breaths as I slid his tip between my folds a few times.

Graham held my hip with one hand and tucked my hair behind my ear with his other one, all the while glancing down at our bodies.

Soon I sank down on him, my skin aching as he stretched me out slowly. We both let our breaths out and my forehead fell to rest against his, eyes locking shut and whimpers spilling out of me.

“Darling,” Graham whispered and buried all his fingertips in the flesh of my hips now, helping to guide my movements.

I quickly grew used to his size and picked up the pace. I was rewarded with the beautiful sound of his breathy moans bouncing off my lips as I still had my forehead pressed against his.

Grasping for his wrist, I vaguely edged his hand closer to my center. He understood my wish and his thumb began rubbing sloppy circles around my most sensitive spot.

“Fuck, Gra!” I cried at the pleasure building quickly in my core. My walls squeezed around him and the growing buzz trickled out into my legs and up my abdomen, threatening to tumble over the edge any second.

“You feel so good,” Graham breathed and I simply panted in response, my fingers wrapped around his strong wrist still as his thumb worked wonders on me.

A string of moans and curses slipped out of me as my high finally hit me, making my thighs shake and clasp around his hips. I collapsed my head against his broad shoulder as I slowed my hips down gradually, twitching at his cock still being buried inside me.

“My love,” Graham whispered, caught my head in his palm and laid me down on my back. The floor was cool and nice against my hot skin.

“Don’t worry, we’ll get you there again,” he promised and sealed it with a kiss as he pushed his length inside me again.

[damonfuckingalbarn]

if you write sub graham i will forever be indebted to you aaaa

Thank you for your request, it took my a while but I really hope I’ve done an alright job. I remember reading/watching something where Damon says something along the lines of Graham likes to be dominated. I might have made this up but I’m so sure something along those lines happened. Anyway, that’s what’s being referenced in the beginning.

I’m also not the best with the whole Dom/sub thing but I tried my best!!

“Good Boy” - 90s Graham x Reader

Pairing- 90s Gra x Reader

Words- 2,239

Warnings- Smut smut smutty smut smut is all I have to say really.

Requests are open, rules for requests are here :)

“Is it true?” The words fell out of your mouth before you could even greet him properly, he laughed lightly, quickly frowning before raising an eyebrow questionably.

“Good evening to you too darling” He grinned, placing a kiss on your cheek before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his embrace “Is what true?”

“What Damon said today, on that interview, is it true Gra?” You pressed, a slight devilish glint in your eyes as you waited for his response. A part of you, a rather big part, wanted it to be true so desperately.

“Damon said lots of things today, I’m gonna need a bit more detail sweetheart” He laughed softly, but your ear against his chest heard his heartbeat fasten, he knew exactly what you were talking about.

“Graham” You warned, pulling away from his chest to cast your eyes over his face, your eyebrows raising at his pouty lips “Damon mentioned a certain something you like in bed”.

You couldn’t help the smirk which appeared over your lips as you watched his face turn instantly red, his gaze dropping from yours as he started to shift his feet. You reached forward, putting your fingertips under his chin as you used them to readjust his head so that you were gazing into each others eyes.

“Well?” You prompted, your fingertips applying just a little bit of pressure into his chin as you waited impatiently for his answer.

“It’s erm, it’s just Damon being a prat” He stuttered out, his eyes darting everywhere so that he wasn’t looking at you. The humour of the situation making the corners of your lips turning upwards. He was always such a bad liar.

“Graham” You warned, raising your eyebrows and relishing in the blush that crept up on his cheeks. You stretched up so that your mouth was resting next to his face, your breath hot on his ear “You wouldn’t like it if I did whatever I pleased with you, came on your cock again and again whilst you beg me to let you orgasm?”

He swallowed hard as his mouth involuntarily dropped open, a bewildered look of shock on his face as he nodded his head slowly. Any words he tried to get out dying in the back of his throat.

“Thought so” You laughed as you took hold of his hand, interlocking your fingers before pulling him behind you into the bedroom.

You pushed him onto the bed, immediately climbing on top of him as your lips connected together desperately. You kept your head just slightly away from his, enough to make him have to stretch up to keep your lips together. He snaked his hands under your top, roaming them along your back until he reached your breasts, his hands immediately dipping into your bra. As much as you were enjoying his hands on you, you had to shake the feeling off. This wasn’t what you were doing tonight.

“No touching unless I say” You breathed, reaching to his hands and wrapping your hands around his wrists, harshly pulling them away from you. His breathing hitched in the back of his throat as he looked up at you with wide eyes, giving you a feeble nod of his head.

“Good boy” You muttered, sitting back so that you were directly on his crotch, your legs either side of his hips. You tipped your head back slightly as you pulled your top over your head, before quickly disposing of your bra too.

You caught Graham’s eye as you ran a hand through your hair, he looked awestruck, his cheeks flushed red as his eyes roamed over your body, you could feel him hardening beneath you which dispelled any worries you had about him not enjoying this. You could tell he was desperate to reach up and touch you, instead, he had grabbed fistfuls of the duvet, so eager to please you and do as you say.

You reached down and unbuttoned his shirt, a finger lazily trailing along his newly exposed chest. You pushed the material open, so that he was completely exposed to you, before dropping your head down and gently nipping at his skin. Letting your tongue swirl around the skin in your mouth as you sucked on it eagerly, desperate to leave as many hickeys as you could all over his body. You left a trail of kisses to his mouth, before connecting your lips together again as you let your boobs press into his chest. You felt him buck his hips ever so slightly beneath you, desperate for any kind of friction on his trapped erection.

“Don’t do that Gra” You tutted as you pulled away from the kiss, your eyes staring intently into his “You wouldn’t want to get into trouble now, would you?”

He shook his head but it was enough for you to pull away completely as you sat back down on his groin, your hips circling lightly just to tease him.

“Use your words” You prompted, his eyes had fluttered closed at the sensation of your grinding on his still clothed dick “Graham”

“I’ll be good” He stuttered out, his eyes looking hopefully up at yours “I’ll do whatever you say”

You hummed in approval as you climbed off of his lap, silently removing his jeans before stripping yourself of your remaining clothes, making sure his eyes followed every move you made in revealing your body to him.

“You’re so fucking beautiful” He whispered, causing a blush to creep onto your cheeks. You dropped your head in the hope he wouldn’t catch a glimpse of it, but you could tell by the small smile on his lips that he knew what effect his words had on you.

You moved across so you were sat down next to him, a hand gently trailing along this thighs and hips, close enough to his erection to make him squirm, but too far to give him any sense of relief.

“What do you want me to do?” You asked, your roaming hand travelling just that bit closer to where you knew he wanted it to be.

A feeble moan fell out of his lips in place of any words, causing you to raise your eyebrows impatiently at him. He swallowed hard before closing his eyes and breathing deeply, desperate to try and compose himself.

“I want, I want you to” He stumbled out, his words collapsing into a moan when you gently squeezed his balls.

“Hm?” You prompted, your eyebrows raised as you started to trace around his cock.

“Want you to sit on my face, wanna make you cum” You hummed at his words, a burning pit in your stomach having been ignited. You let your eyes roam over him again, never had you ever seen him come undone and fall apart this easily before.

You trailed your lips along his body, leaving more hickeys in your wake, before briefly pressing your lips against his. Upon pulling away you quickly readjusted your legs so that they were either side of his face and you were straddling him.

You let out a shaky breath as his lips connected with your core, he wasted no time in pleasuring you like his life depended on it. You kept yourself upright so that your entire weight wasn’t resting on his face, a part of your mind worried that you’d hurt him, but he reached up and wrapped an arm around each of your thighs, pulling you as close as possible to him. His arms held you in place as he desperately swirled his tongue around, his nose brushing against your clit.

You let a moan of his name fall out of your lips as any previous ideas of making sure you were in control fell away. It was difficult to tell him what to do when he had such a natural talent of pleasuring you.

“Fuck Gra, you’re doing such a good job” You praised, you could feel the smile appear over his lips, your words giving him another surge of energy.

You could feel the coil begin to tighten in your stomach and you reached down to grab fistfuls of his hair, pulling on the strands to try and keep yourself upright. A throaty moan fell out of his mouth and travelled sensually through your core.

“I’m really close” You whispered, he tilted his head back so that he could focus on your clit. Lovingly swirling his tongue around the sensitive nub, which made your head start to spin, though his teeth grazing across is what sent you over the edge. Your grip on his hair tightened, your legs squeezing together and trapping his head between them as you came with a loud repetitive moan of his name.

You took a couple of minutes to control your breathing before moving yourself away from his face and readjusting yourself so that you were lying directly on top of him. Your hips naturally grinding on his, painfully hard, cock.

You reached forward to connect your lips, tasting yourself on his tongue as he let you explore his mouth. Your teeth clashing as the lust started to take over both of your bodies, any romantics being long forgotten as a desire for release travelled through his body.

“Are you gonna fuck me?” You whispered in his ear, your lips dropping down to leave a hickey on his neck before you prompted a response from him “I’m waiting Graham”

“Yes” He suddenly announced, his breathing fastening as his face flushed a shade of pink again “Please”

“Yes?” You repeated questioningly, an eyebrow raised as you watched him squirm beneath you, nodding his head to agree with you “That’s not enough, wanna hear you beg”

“Really?” He asked breathlessly, propping himself up on his elbows as he frowned at you.

“Hm really” You responded sharply, a hand trailing down his body to lightly trail across his cock, you barely touched him but it was enough for a moan to stumble out of his lips “It doesn’t bother me, I’ve already had an orgasm, I could quite happily roll over and go to sleep, leaving you desperate to cum”

“No no no” He stuttered out, the idea of me suddenly leaving him high and dry seeming to terrify him “I wanna fuck you, god darling you’re killing me, please let me, I want to feel you around me and I’m gonna make you cum again, please y/n”

“Good boy” You whispered, pushing him back down onto the bed before climbing on top of him, readjusting your hips so that his tip was at your entrance, you wasted no time in sinking down on him. The moan escaping Graham’s mouth being almost enough to send you over the edge again.

You leaned forward so that your boobs hung above Graham’s face, his breath hot on your sensitive skin as he panted beneath you. You let your hips do the work, bouncing up and down on his dick as a series of moans fell out of your lips.

You closed your eyes briefly, squeezing them shut when he unexpectedly took one of your nipples into his mouth, his tongue flicking over it before gently grazing his teeth on the sensitive area.

“You’re so good Gra” You moaned, the pleasure had started to slow you down and make your head spin which meant that the movements of your hips were long forgotten as you lost yourself in the sensations Graham was inflicting on you.

“Want you to fuck me” You told him breathlessly. He laughed lightly at your words, nodding his head eagerly as he slipped his hands behind your shoulder blades, holding you close to his chest before flipping you both over. So that you were on all fours and he had positioned himself behind you, his dick hitting you from a different angle almost causing your elbows to give way.

The speed of his thrusts and his hands aimlessly clawing along your back told me that he was close, desperately close. You wanted nothing more than to make him hold on, not let him finish until you said so but it was your first time having sex in this dynamic and he had already been so good so you just couldn’t bring yourself to make him hold on.

“I’m really, god really close” He warned, You nodded your head as you moaned in agreement, his new speed was hitting you in all the right spots and you knew you were dangerously close to falling over the edge.

“Cum with me Gra” You encouraged, a shaky hand reaching to rub your clit as he started on an inhumane speed.

He came with a loud moan of your name, which was enough to sent you over the edge. Your walls squeezing around his cock as it twitched inside of you. Your body shook with pleasure as you felt your second orgasm rush through you.

He placed a tender kiss in between your shoulder blades before pulling out, quickly grabbing a tissue to gently wipe any cum falling out of you.

“Thank you” He mumbled as he climbed under the duvet.

“Thank you?” You questioned, a frown on your face as you joined him under the blanket.

“I was so worried that Damon had fucked everything up and that you’d think I was a right freak but it was absolutely, you’re absolutely perfect”

[spunkpunx]

Bittersweet Bundle Of Misery - Graham Coxon

Plot: Reader is dating Alex James, and finds herself miserable, but finds comfort in a tumultuous affair with his friend, and guitarist, Graham Coxon.

I will probably do a part 2.

Word count: 5153!

Warnings: Drugs, Alcoholism, Smut, Angst, Smoking

April 1996

Alex loved France. Not only that, but the French loved him, specifically the women. I didn't need to understand his words to recognise the flirty tone in his voice when he spoke to the waitresses, the bar staff, in fact, basically any attractive woman who fluttered her eyelashes at him. I wasn't sure how to feel about it. Of course, I knew Alex well, so I was never under the impression that he would be a devout, faithful partner, but I also never expected him to be so explicit in his relationships with other women. We both considered the relationship open, but Alex was the only one who seemed to take advantage of that situation.

I found solace in hanging around with Graham. The tour was stressful. We both struggled. We all drank, but for Graham it was a necessity. I spent more time with Graham than with Alex, but of course he didn’t care. The words “jealous” and “possessive” were not in his vocabulary, but then again, neither was “monogamous”.

I was tired and miserable. The venues where the band played could be stubborn about sound-checking themselves. This resulted in a lot of arguments, as I was strictly instructed that the band were only to have their own sound technician (me). Alex and Damon could be rude. Since I’d been dating Alex, nobody took my work seriously. I stopped being a technician with almost seven years experience on tour, and became “Alex’s girlfriend helping out”. The crew could be horribly sexist at times. Even Ivan dismissed me when I brought him a problem.

“Get one of the other technicians to look at it,” he said, after I told him that one of the venue’s sound guys had wired the bass into a guitar amp and not the subwoofer. He must have turned up the volume to compensate for the sound and blown the speaker.

“I know what I’m doing! I’ve worked with this band for years!” I ended up snapping. I heard one of the roadies mumble something about a period and it sent me over the edge. Sometimes I got so angry it was like I didn’t have control over my impulses anymore. I told them all to fuck off and stormed out the room, kicking the door with a tremendous thud as I left. After I’d cooled down and returned, the crew tiptoed around me like I’d overreacted. After the gig, Ivan came over to speak to me.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to undermine you. You’re one of the best sound techs we’ve had,” he apologised, giving me a friendly pat on the shoulder. I appreciated the apology, it was the first one I’d had since the tour began.

Alex and I had an argument that night. We argued often, but this was explosive. He came into my room, coked up and horny, sitting next to me on the bed and pressing wet kisses to my neck.

“Are you over your little tantrum?” he asked, kneading my breast a little roughly. I pulled away.

“Little tantrum?” I repeated, surprised at his tactless words. “Everyone has been treating me like shit recently Alex.” He shrugged, running a hand up my thigh over my jeans, toying with my top button.

“Whatever it was. Ivan was trying to help and you just went mental,” he laughed, like it was all a big joke. He pressed his lips against mine and I pushed him away.

“It’s your fault I’ve been feeling like this!” I snapped. “If I didn’t start dating you then people would actually treat me like a professional! All of a sudden Damon is asking the drum tech to check the mic volume before they go on!”

“All of a sudden it’s my fault?” he asked, voice raising slightly. “Just cause you overreacted and bit Ivan’s head off?!”

“You don’t get it Alex! If you were ever actually here you’d understand how I was feeling, but you’re always off snorting lines and banging these fucking French girls!” I shouted at him.

“Well maybe I’d be here more if you actually put out instead of just going off at me!” he yelled back. I stood up, walking across the room with my hair clenched in my fists. I wanted as much distance between us as possible.

“Put out?” I looked at him incredulously. “So you’re only here if you can have sex with me? This relationship only exists so you can rely on me having sex with you whenever you fancy?!” We were both properly shouting now.

“That’s what relationships are! That’s what love is! The only difference between friends and relationships is sex!” he replied, seeing this as perfectly valid reasoning.

“So all I am is sex to you?” I asked, my voice now dangerously softer but still dripping with venom.

“No... That’s not- Stop twisting my fucking words!”

I calmly picked up my cigarette carton and lit one, letting his point ferment.

“Get out,” I spat. He glowered at me, standing up and leaving the room, slamming the hotel room door behind him.

As soon as he left the room, hot tears started spilling down my face, not tears of sadness but of rage. I felt overwhelmed. I smoked a cigarette, then another, the deep inhalation subduing my frustration. I heard a soft knock at the door.

“Piss off Alex!”

“It’s not Alex,” came Graham’s gentle reply. I stood and opened the door, wiping at my cheeks with the back of my hand.

“Gra,” I huffed in relief at his presence.

“I heard you were arguing, I wanted to see you were okay,” he said. It didn’t surprise me he’d heard it. Graham’s room was just across the hall, and we’d not been quiet. “Pub?” he offered, smiling slightly.

“Yeah alright, I’ll just grab my coat.”

We found a small bar not too far away from the hotel. Neither of us spoke particularly good French, but Graham knew enough to order some wine. The Parisians didn’t drink the same way the British did, and both of us were a little too embarrassed to try and order two pints of beer and a pack of cheese and onion crisps. Instead, we sat with a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc and two glasses, hidden away in a back booth and laughing at our clumsy attempts at the French language.

“It’s so embarrassing walking round with Mr Culture speaking fluent French like it’s the most natural thing in the world, meanwhile I struggle asking the man in the shop for a packet of fags,” I complained, chuckling.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what were you arguing about before?” Graham queried.

“Oh, just...” I paused, unsure whether to tell him or whether he’d just agree with Alex. “Well you know how I lost my temper before?” Graham nodded, sucking his lips into his mouth like he always did when he was listening. “Well he made a joke about it, and it pissed me off. I dunno, I feel so tired and miserable recently, and the way everyone has been treating me like I’m totally incompetent at my job is so difficult. Alex is never there, he just swans around doing whatever he wants, meanwhile I just feel so overwhelmed,” I spilled, not even intending to share that much. Something about the build up of emotions in my life and Graham’s reassuring presence at the end of the table made me feel the sudden need to tell him everything. “I just don’t feel happy anymore.”

“I know how you feel, kind of,” Graham reassured, placing his hand over mine, while I took a large swig of wine. Looking back, I think that was the first moment I thought about kissing him. Of course I didn’t, we stayed out most of the night and then stumbled back to the hotel drunk. But I actually considered that maybe I wouldn’t feel so bad if I was dating Graham, not Alex.

October 1996

I never expected the knock at the door. It was a cold night in mid October, so when I opened the door wearing only a large t-shirt and odd socks, the biting breeze nipped at my bare legs. Graham stood there awkwardly, wrapped up in a fleece lined jacket and his eyes slightly glazed in his drunkness. I didn't ask any questions, just greeted him with a hug that lasted a few seconds longer than usual, then invited him in.

Graham wasn't a happy man, but I myself was hardly a ray of sunshine. I sat down next to him on my old settee, lighting a cigarette and refilling my wine glass. I offered him a glass but he shook his head.

"What's up Gra?" I asked him softly, reaching out to cover his hand with my own. He let out a dejected sigh.

"I can't do it anymore (y/n)," he explained. "The band. I'm starting to hate them all. The press, the tours, the people. It's way too fucking much. Damon won't change the music we do, he's being a controlling bastard, and then Alex, fuck." Graham pulled at his earlobe, something I noticed him do often when he was feeling nervous or stressed.

"What is it?"

"He's out living his playboy lifestyle, shagging around, doing lines, drinking champagne. Meanwhile, you just sit around pretending like everything is fine!"

I dropped my hand from his. I wasn't ready for this criticism, especially not from a man who was currently drunk every second of his life.

"It is fine, Gra."

"No it's not, because he barely gives you a backwards glance when he goes out and I have to watch it," he complained. He turned to me, looking over my face like he was drinking it in. "I think you're so beautiful."

"What?"

"So, so fucking beautiful," he repeated. Graham was bad at eye contact, but right now he was drunk, and looking at me with such a sinful look in his gaze. He glanced over my lips, and the small flip in my stomach as he did was my only sign. There had been moments over the past year where Graham and I had shared similar glances, but neither of us acted on impulse, until now.

I leaned in and pressed my lips against his. Immediately his hands slipped around my waist, pulling me flush against his body. His tongue slipped into my mouth, and as he deepened the kiss I pushed his jacket off of his shoulders. He assisted my movements, pulling it off to fall lazily on the floor.

His hand travelled down to my underwear, tucking a finger beneath the waistband of my knickers, pausing to see if I stopped him. I did, but only to pull his t-shirt over his head. I had seen Graham without a shirt before, but now I took in his lithe physique and broad shoulders. He slipped his hand to my clit, rubbing it in slow circles. I gasped at his touch and he leant down to brush his lips against my ear.

“You turn me on so much,” he whispered honestly, slipping two fingers inside me and curling them up. I moaned into his neck, pressing a kiss against it. Alex never really bothered with foreplay so this felt like heaven. After a minute he pulled his fingers out to push me down against the sofa, as I pulled him into another hungry kiss. He pushed his hips against mine and I let out another soft moan while he smiled into the kiss. Soon the desperation over took us and I fumbled with his belt, helping him remove the rest of his clothes before he pulled my t-shirt over my head, drinking in my body.

For a second he tucked his hands into my hair, holding my face behind my ears and stroking me cheeks with his thumb, before kissing me playfully on the nose. He pushed himself inside me with a slight groan, watching my face as I let out a satisfied sigh. I felt so appreciated, the way he looked at me was so tender. Unlike my day to day misery with Alex, this felt so raw, so right. He cupped one of my breasts with his hand, kneading it gently as he softly kissed and nipped at my neck. I felt sweat beading along my thighs, pressed into his body as we lay on the sofa, fully naked with the exception of our socks. He picked up the pace, and I could tell he was trying to control his urge to finish as quickly as possible. He rubbed my clit with the rough pad of his thumb, causing me to let out an unexpectedly loud moan as I clenched around him and my body shook. This brought him over the edge and he finished inside of me with a string of swears. He looked at me slightly panicked.

“Are you on birth control?” he asked, and I laughed, nodding, still out of breath and thrumming from my orgasm. He rested his forehead against my own and we lay there for a moment, panting, letting it register what had just occurred. I didn’t feel guilty at all, although I could tell Graham did. Alex had said so many things to me now that I couldn’t feel regret for sleeping with his friend, not when the moment was so sweet. Then he seemed to be pulled back into reality.

“I’m sorry,” he apologised, standing up and looking for his boxers. “I didn’t mean to do that, it wasn’t the plan.” I furrowed my eyebrows slightly.

“The plan? What was the plan?” I asked.

“I was going to tell you I love you, but you weren’t supposed to... You were going to tell me to piss off and then I could lay it to rest. I’m sorry. I’m drunk.” He pulled his boxers up and started looking for his jeans, but I reached out for his hand, pulling him round to look at me. I was still naked, knees drawn up to my chest on the sofa. I saw his eyes soften, his behaviour calm.

“Gra, I don’t want you to go,” I pleaded, my voice coming out a lot quieter than i intended. Alex and I had had another argument, and I was already feeling so lost until Graham showed up.

He paused, looking at out two hands together. I held my breath, waiting for his response. I needed him to make the irresponsible decision. Eventually, he nodded, and I nipped to the bathroom to clean myself up. When I came back in, clean and wearing a t-shirt and knickers, Graham had settled on the settee with the telly on, he’d also pulled his t-shirt on. I came to sit next to him, and he rested his head on my chest slightly while I began to run my fingers through his hair and he hummed contentedly. The show was boring, a late night crime drama. Within a few minutes Graham was snoring softly on my chest. I sipped my wine and smiled to myself.

November 1996

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Graham rolled over with a groan of pleasure, panting with sweat on his brow. I turned on my side to face him and he pulled a stupid face, still lying on his back. I let out a sigh and turned over, away from him.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, concerned, moving closer and pressing a kiss onto my shoulder. One of his large hands rested on my waist and I suppressed the urge to sniffle.

“We don’t love each other though do we?” I said rhetorically.

“Why’d you say that?”

“Well, if we loved each other, then I’d leave Alex and you’d stop drinking so much.” I felt so bad saying it, but it was true. Even as Graham arrived in a better mood today, there was still an alcoholic taste on his tongue. We’d been seeing each other for over a month, and I knew I wasn’t breaking up with Alex any time soon.

“Maybe you’re right, but still, it feels nice to say, doesn’t it?” he pointed out, nuzzling his head into my neck as he ran his hand round to lay against my stomach, pulling my back closer to his chest.

Sometimes it felt like Alex must have known about me and Graham’s relationship, because he suddenly changed last month. Of course, we still argued. He still enjoyed champagne and cocaine and plenty of women, but god he was good at apologising. After arguments he’d always pull off the perfect apology. He’d me out to an expensive restaurant and completely overlook every gorgeous woman there. He’d make a point of telling the waitress that he must be the stupidest man on earth to have an argument with his ‘beautiful girlfriend’ and would try and show me off to every person in the room. Sometimes his apologies were less flashy, sometimes they came in the form of a home cooked croque monsieur in the morning, and kisses all over my face. Alex had the ability to make me feel both completely worthless and wonderfully special, but when he made me feel so special the guilt always tainted my mood.

In fact, it was at this moment a knock came at the door. I sat up in slight panic. Graham looked at me in confusion.

“It must be Alex,” I told him in a hushed voice.

“Shit.”

The knock came again. I pulled on a shirt from the cupboard, padding through my flat to the living room.

“Hey, (y/n). I know your home,” he said through the door.

“Can you come back later, Al?” I asked, doing up a couple of the buttons. “There’s someone here at the minute.”

“No, just open the door,” he persisted. I sighed, walking over and unlocking it. I stood there in a just the oversized shirt and some underwear I’d pulled on. My bedroom door was shut, Alex wouldn’t mind as long as he didn’t know who was in there.

“I’m in the middle of something,” I said slightly exasperated.

“Fucking hell, you look good,” he grinned, looking me up and down before pushing his way past to get into my flat.

“Hey, don’t come in!” I protested.

“It’s fine, love. I left my keys somewhere here, I just came to grab them,” Alex replied, going into the kitchen and picking them up off the side. He walked into the living, cheeky smile on his face. “Hey, can I say hello to whoever is in there?” he teased, stepping towards my bedroom door. I rushed forward, pushing him away while he teasingly stood his ground.

“No you cannot, it’s weird. If I come into yours while someone’s there you look like a philanderer, but when you come here guys think you’re my pimp or something,” I argued, managing to get him across the room toward the front door.

“Okay, fine,” Alex agreed, dropping his hands to around my waist. “Kiss goodbye?” he requested in a silly voice, tilting his head to the side. I rolled my eyes, but agreed. He pressed his lips to mine for a moment, dropping his hand to squeeze my arse jokingly, and I pulled away to give him a lighthearted smack on the arm and hurrying him out the flat.

When I walked back into my room, Graham was still nestled beneath the duvet, his head poking over the top.

January 1997

"You have to be joking, right?" came the surprised voice of Blur's bassist. Alex was stood in the doorway of a backroom at Groucho's. His pupils were like goddamn dinner plates, as per usual, but for once he was acting surprisingly sober for someone so off their tits. We'd been caught, and as Alex cast a disbelieving look between myself and his bandmate my heart dropped down into the bottom of my stomach.

I had been dating Alex James for just about two years, and had known him for four, and although our relationship wasn't defined as such, it was a rather open one. This, however, seemed to be a breach of our agreement. This wasn't a random person, or even a distant friend, this was Graham.

When Alex had walked in, he'd come across a scene that was a little bit more than over friendly. The guitarist had his hand underneath my skirt and was kissing my neck while we laughed drunkly. Of course, then came the interruption, and we had jumped apart at the arrival of my boyfriend. I sat awkwardly, chewing my lip, feeling like a naughty school kid. Nobody spoke. It was difficult to know what to say. There was no chance of convincing him it was less than he thought, I'm sure our guilty faces spoke volumes. After a pause that went on for way too long, I tried to speak up.

"Al-" I began to reason but my voice was cut of.

"No," he interjected. "I can't fucking believe it. You're my mate, Gra. You're in the band. Of course, the quiet, sweet one. Works for you doesn't it? 'Cause this whole time you've been fucking my girlfriend," Alex snapped. I saw Graham look down, his jaw clenched slightly. I wanted to reach for his hand but I knew it wasn't the time.

"Alex,” I warned but he scoffed at me.

"Piss off with that, (Y/N)," he scolded with an incredulous laugh. "Get your stuff from my place tomorrow, but don't come too early 'cause I'm bringing home that blonde girl from the bar tonight," he told me harshly, leaving the room, probably to go practice his lines in the bathroom.

I sat back down next to Graham, my frown mirroring his. I tipped my head onto his shoulder, and he pulled me into him with a comforting arm. It was difficult to pin down my feelings, although guilt was the presiding one. I felt especially guilty for not finding the ability to care that Alex had just split up with me. I felt tears prick my eyes, unable to stop myself from crying. Graham tilted his head to me, brushing the tears from underneath my eyes with his thumb, and pressing a kiss onto my forehead. I tried to pull him in for a kiss, to distract myself from my current feelings, but he turned his head away.

“Now’s not the time,” he told me gently.

February 1997

I didn’t expect to still accompany the boys on the American tour, in fact, I was aware Alex had greatly argued against it, but Ivan had insisted. I was under contract to the record label and familiar with the set up and how the band liked things. I rather have stayed in London to be honest.

Before we left, Blur released their self titled album, kicking it off with a 'secret' gig at the Astoria to a sold out crowd of two thousand people. The mood was so elevated, all tensions seemed to be erased. A huge after party went down. It was packed with Britpop royalty and went completely out of hand. That night I even stupidly assumed that things would go back to normal, water under the bridge.

I only listened to the album two days later. It was totally different to anything they'd done before. I recognised the influence of the underground bands Graham listened to, although the tone seemed slightly ironic. The album seemed fast paced, but then, halfway through the album came an unexpected softer number, Graham's soft voice coming into my living room through a layer of crackly voice effects. The first verse was despairing. I knew Graham was struggling with his alcohol, but I'd been doing so awfully myself that I didn't even realise how bad it had gotten. It was the chorus that really ruined me though; heartwrenchingly honest and bitterly optimistic. I didn't care if he'd written it about me or not, but that last line hit me somewhere deep in my heart and put tears in my eyes. By the time the song had ended I was a sniffling mess on my living room floor and brimming with such a strong sense of love.

We left to France two days later. The crew were acting strange with me. Everyone knew that I’d now slept with two members of the band, and there was lots of implication I was going to try a third. Damon was acting well off with me and usually I found myself sat with Graham receiving glares from both Damon and Alex. We had to go through Paris and then Tokyo before we arrived in the US at the beginning of March. Things were okay when we all got drunk enough, the boys tended to forget about my crimes against the band. We did sing alongs at our hotels. Alex got a bit arsey when Graham fell asleep with his head in my lap in Tokyo, but he’d happily bring girls to drink with us and happily snog them while I was sat there. I didn’t mind, the part of me that cared was so easy to shut off now.

I loved Japan, and the Japanese loved Blur. Damon was particularly popular with his blond hair, blue eyes and pretty face. The reception at the airport was always brilliant. There would always be a crowd of teenage girls desperate for a signature off their favourite band member, I think one of the Gallaghers already said it, but it was like a second wave Beatlemania. I usually sat back with Ivan, watching the boys deal with their fans, especially Graham. While Alex and Damon used a charming smile, Gra always seemed so unsure what he was doing was right. It was very endearing. I wanted to stay as far away from fame as possible.

Me and Alex’s breakup was extremely high profile. Of course, why we split up was a public mystery, only adding to interest levels. We kept our relationship fairly private, although I had experienced the odd incident with paparazzi, but the Blur management team saw great opportunity for promotion with our split. I was hounded by music journalists for weeks, and photos of me suddenly started appearing all over the gossip magazines. As much as I didn’t want to be stuck on tour with Alex, I had to say it was a relief to leave it behind.

Graham still came to my hotel room late at night, but for both of our sakes he left way before the sun rose. That part was the hardest, when he climbed out of bed to get dressed and leave. I’d watch him put on his clothes, peeking my head over the bedsheets and not speaking. He’d press a kiss to my forehead and tiptoe out the room, back to his own. Then I was alone. I think that fear of being alone was what kept me from ending things with Alex, because staring up at the ceiling after Graham left was the most saddening feeling in the world. I couldn’t say I love you to him anymore, even if I did. When I was still with Alex, it was just a phrase, but then it had become an empty promise. I was far too scared to bear my soul to him like that. I think it upset him slightly, when I wouldn’t say it back, but he never mentioned it.

It was moments like that, lying alone in bed and feeling totally isolated, with nothing but the rushing thoughts in my head, that I would have given anything for Alex to burst into my room and pick a fight with me again. Sometimes I wanted him to loose his temper, to see me across the room and to shout at me, to call me names. His willing acceptance of the situation hurt me most. His ability to move on like it was nothing.

March 1997

Things went downhill once we arrived in America. Everyone was jet lagged from the flight and we were mainly travelling around on a tour bus. Being in such close confines did have a habit of getting on everyone’s nerves. I was sharing a tour bus with some other sound technicians, which was a nightmare. I was the only woman on tour, and every morning I got up an hour before everyone else so I could get dressed without being stared at by a group of blokes. Unfortunately, I was also going to bed in the early hours of the morning anyway, so I was feeling twice as exhausted as usual.

Suddenly, Alex seemed a whole lot more pissed at me than before. Any time Graham and I were even in the same room, he would glare until one of us left. He couldn't help but leave snide comments.

The other issue with being on tour was privacy. I barely got a second alone with Graham. Damon had walked in on one of our few opportunities, while Graham had his head between my legs, and aside from it being very embarrassing, since the incident Damon had been twice as off with me as ever before. Eventually, Graham and I settled for cuddles and conversation, this seemed to cause the least tension.

One night in Detroit, we all went out to a bar. I found in America all anyone ever wanted to know was 'what you did'. Of course, this was in reference to career, but I'd recently found entertainment in replying "nothing much". I spoke to lots of American's, receiving regular compliments on my accent. We drank lots, Alex ended up taking a very attractive blonde girl to the tour bus, leaving the rest of us to continue our evening by drinking enough to knock out an elephant. At one point I wobbled outside for a cigarette and some fresh air.

I stood by the back door and the bins, inhaling the smoke and letting the cold sober me slightly. Then, a very drunk Damon stumbled out the pub, proceeding to bend over by the wall and vomit onto the floor and his trainers. I rushed over, putting a hand on his back and trying to shuffle his feet away to avoid where he was being sick. He finished throwing up and swatted me away.

"Piss off (y/n)," he slurred. "It's your fault it's like this." I stepped back, surprised at his words.

"What?"

"You cocked everything up!" he whined, leaning against the wall for support. "You broke Alex's heart, and now he's mad at Gra, and now Gra's in love with you and you're going to hurt him. Fucking hell, (y/n), look at him! Can't you see what it'd do to him!"

I couldn't help it. For what seemed like the millionth time in the past month, tears prickled my eyes. I never usually cried, but now all my emotions lay very close to the surface.

"I don't want to hurt Graham, Dames. I never wanted to ruin anything," I sniffled, taking a drag from my cigarette to try to calm my wavering voice. "I love Gra, I really do, it's just... complicated."

Damon's eyes softened slightly, and then he fell over into his own sick.

[cowboykitt]

he was a boy

she was a girl

can i make it any more obvious ?