#graceland spoilers
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GRACELAND SEASON TWO EPISODE NINE GRATIS YOU WILL ALWASY BE FUCKING FAMOUS!!!!!! it literally has everything ever LIKE. johnny tuturro "if i bisexualed. i dont bisexual bc i did. no i didnt❤️". carlito boogeyman homophobia metaphor. the breakfast scene where it's literally just a five minute conversation between carlito his dad and johnny (with lucia left on the outskirts) but entire relationship dynamics shift every time someone speaks. carlitos dad asking johnny "do you believe that is your job now [to protect my children]?" johnny looking back at lucia as he leaves the table. mike asleep in the car w his silly little sunglasses on and feeling #mentally tortured. ambercharlie "men or women?" scene. mike's slow realization and the cut to lina's body where it looks like all the light has died in the room and for a second she is sprawled out and small and alone. mike in a white shirt covered in blood. mike's necklace hanging out bc symbolism. briggs' tape playing over mike burning lina's body. INSANEST EPISODE OF ANY TV SHOW TO EVER BE AIRED IN ALL OF HISTORY
#rewatching it rn and i literally had to pause the episode and make this post bc it is so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#AND DONT EVEN GET ME FUCKING STARTED ON THE SCENE W JOHNNY AND LUCIA IN THE FRANCISCAN MISSION#LITERALLY EVERY LINE UTTERED IN THAT SCENE IS LIKE A SHOT TO THE CHEST#graceland#graceland spoilers#c speaks#gratisposting#my posts
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Graceland Too by Phoebe Bridgers -- Arcane
#do you guys mind if i cry about my wife for a second?#can i be emo about her?#for just a sec?#i love this woman so much#what the fuck#she's not even fucking real#arcane#arcane edit#sevika#sevika arcane#sevika edit#my edit#graceland too#phoebe bridgers#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2
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Tomorrow Will Be Too Late part 5 feels (coming soon)
#tomorrow will be too late#time travel#time travel fic#spoilers sweetie#elvis presley#elvis#elvis presley fic#vibes#feels#graceland#written by ab4eva#chapter 5 coming soon I hope#ahhh thanks for your patience
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The Thunderbird Cape
June 30th, 1973 at Atlanta's Omni Coliseum: Just before the first show of the day, someone told Elvis that a five year old Robbie Barnes was attending the show and that he would be dressed up like him in his own lil' jumpsuit. During the show Elvis asked to turn the spotlight on the boy and at the end of the concert he gave Robbie the cape off the Thunderbird suit he was wearing that night. The Thunderbird's cape is regarded as one of the heaviest and most expensive of all of Elvis' jumpsuits. And in addition, J.D. Sumner mumbled to Elvis, "Elvis, give the boy your belt too!" and naturally Elvis did.
#thunderbird jumpsuit#elvis#elvis presley#elvis aaron presley#70s elvis#jumpsuit elvis#elvis jumpsuits#1973#elvis meetings#my edits#first photo is taken at a different date as the suit is worn with the Jack Lord Belt as it was a gift from the hawaiian actor#while this was not at display at graceland when i went its said the displayed suit is different from in photos so there were either#multiple suits made and the displayed one wasnt worn?? or it was altered after he wore it last in 73#but the cape and belt are still owned privately...at least i hope so!#he has so many suits with birds tbh i just look at any of them and im like yep same suit but theyre very much not lol#ugh...this man i just love him so much no one does shit like this these days much less the biggest more well known artist on the#planet on the time...and i honestly dont understand why this kind of generosity isnt more common#research deep dives are so enjoyable...lol i just find it funny i found this trying to see when and where he preformed closest to my home#spoiler alert the place still exists about 30 min away and its now a Gay Country Western Club amen i cant wait to go!!!
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Secrets and Their Burdens
Pairing - Tim Bradford x reader
Word count - 21.8K
Warnings - inaccurate police & FBI scenes, drugs, needles, addiction, nausea, mentions of throwing up, angst, kidnapping, swearing, Graceland spoilers, alcohol, guns, murder
Summary - after an undercover mission gone wrong, you are forced to hide a secret from Tim until his curiosity (and jealousy) get the better of him
A/N - hey y'all! I'm so sorry it's been so long since I last posted a fic, I truly have no excuse other than the fact that this fic just ended up being so much longer than I expected (genuinely I'm sorry for the length). like I mentioned before, this is a crossover fic with the tv show Graceland so tbh I'm not expecting this fic to do very well I literally wrote this for me (but I'm more than willing to answer any questions people may have about it). I did have a lot of fun writing it though and I do kinda hope y'all enjoy it too. as per y'all please send in requests, feedback and enjoy!!!
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Being an FBI agent wasn’t the easiest job in the world, especially when a large chunk of your life was spent lying while undercover with some of the most dangerous people in Los Angeles. You had moved into a mixed agency house called Graceland and had quickly formed strong relationships with everyone who lived there. As well as working undercover, you were also in regular contact with the LAPD and found yourself getting familiar with the officers of Mid-Wilshire Police Station, especially Tim Bradford who you had formed a close friendship with despite your attempts to keep some distance between the two of you due to the nature of your job.
“Agent l/n. What brings you here?” You turn around at the sound of Tim’s voice, a smile on your face as he approaches.
“Briggs has got me undercover with some drug dealers who deal with Caza Cartel stuff but there’s this new dealer called Odin whose drugs are hitting the street. I’m here trying to find out if you guys have arrested anyone who deals with Odin’s stuff.” You explain, arms folding across your chest as you watch Tim’s reaction, his eyebrows furrowing slightly in concern.
“Should we be worried about Odin?” Tim asks, not missing how you sighed, your eyes flicking to the floor for a brief second before looking back up at him.
“I’m not sure. Mike is undercover with a bigger drug lord, one we’re trying to coax into starting a new deal with Odin. We’re hoping Odin will show himself at a meet with Bello. Other than that we’re trying our best to target your average back alley dealer to see if they can get us a meet.” You say, feeling guilty that you had no other information. It frustrated you to no end that no one could get any information on Odin and what his plans were. All you knew was that Odin’s drugs were dangerous, and people would die if they weren’t careful, especially when the Caza Cartel figured out that there was a new supplier in town.
“Well, I can help you check our records if you want?” Tim offers, watching as you shake your head softly.
“You got in just after I finished checking, none of the guys you arrested have a clue who Odin was nor did they sell Caza stuff. Just run-of-the-mill drug dealers.” You shrug, sighing as you drop your hands to your sides.
“Hey, if I find anything. You��ll be the first to know.” Tim vows, noticing your dejected expression at getting nowhere with your investigation.
“Thank you, Tim. Anything you might find would really help and I’d appreciate it a lot.” You say, your smile making a small return as Tim returns with a smile of his own.
“Tim, Grey wants us to assist on a call.” Lucy gently interrupts, her gaze flicking between you and Tim as you look over at her.
“Got it.” Tim nods at Lucy before looking back over at you.
“Be safe out there. I don’t want the next time I see you to be in a hospital.” You say with a friendly wink as Tim nods with a soft laugh.
“You too. I’ll see you around. Hopefully not in a hospital.” Tim replies, his tone becoming lighter and becoming a joking tone as he nods before you make your way past Tim to leave the station while Tim watches you make your way out.
“You totally have a crush on her,” Lucy says quickly, making Tim’s head snap around to look at her, a shocked expression on his face.
“No, I do not!” Tim insists, his voice getting slightly higher at the accusation, all while Lucy folds her arms across her chest, an eyebrow raising as she studies Tim’s reaction.
“Okay, sure you don’t,” Lucy says, amused by how her training officer had reacted to her words and vowing to keep bugging him until he admits it.
“Anyone home?” You call through the house as soon as you enter, glancing around as you make your way inside.
“Yo!” You hear Jakes call back, following his voice into the kitchen where he is filling a glass with orange juice.
“Anything fun on the agenda today?” You ask, grabbing a glass and filling it with water.
“Just still dealing with my smuggled bird's case. It’s got to be one of the longest cases I’ve worked and I still can’t figure out how I feel about it.” Jakes complains, leaning against the island as he takes a sip from his juice.
“At least you’re saving birds. They didn’t ask to be smuggled.” You say with a light shrug, laughing as Jakes rolls his eyes.
“You’re way too optimistic. You’re like a Johnny 2.0.” Jakes fires back as you laugh.
“Technically speaking I’m older than Johnny so shouldn’t Johnny be y/n 2.0.?” You question, grinning at Jakes as he scoffs, downing his drink before putting his glass in the sink and walking off just as Mike enters the kitchen still in his wetsuit and hair visibly wet from his morning in the sea.
“Where were you? You missed out on some good waves.” Mike comments, opening one of the cupboards and grabbing the bread, taking two slices and putting them in the toaster as you sigh lightly.
“I headed over to Mid-Wilshire to see if they had any recent arrests that could connect us to Odin but they all seemed to be dead ends.” You say, looking down to focus on the glass in your hands.
“Nothing?” Mike queries, grabbing a plate and the butter while waiting for the bread to toast.
“Unfortunately. But Tim said he’d let me know if they arrest someone who may be of interest.” You say, missing how Mike’s eyes widened slightly at the mention of Tim’s name as an amused smile crossed his face.
“Tim’s definitely got a soft spot for you,” Briggs says with a laugh as he enters the kitchen, also clad in a wetsuit and clearly having heard the last thing you said as you roll your eyes.
“No, he doesn’t.” You deflect, feeling your cheeks heat up as you turn away from the two so you can wash your glass and leave it to dry on the rack.
“Something tells me you have a soft spot for him too.” Briggs teases, crossing to you, slinging his arm around your shoulder and jostling you, ignoring your groan at the dampness of his wetsuit against your clothes.
“He’s a nice guy. He’s helped me on more than one occasion of course I’m going to be nice to him.” You huff, shrugging Briggs’ arm off you as he laughs. You had learned to deal with Briggs’ joking, he had quickly become an older brother figure to you when you joined Graceland. Plus he was the senior agent within the house so it wasn’t like you could get rid of him easily anyway.
“All we’re saying is there’s nothing wrong with liking him. I mean he’s a cop anyway so it’s not like you have to lie to him about your career like you’d have to with anyone else.” Mike says, a slight sadness flashing across his face at the thought of Abby and how he had to lie to her repeatedly about his life.
“You guys can believe I have feelings for Tim but you’re wrong. I was trying to see if they had any links to Odin and Tim offered to let me know if he found anything and that’s it. I promise.” You insist, folding your arms across your chest and leaning against the kitchen counter as Mike and Briggs exchange a look.
“Well, you keep believing that. I’m going to get ready, I’m spending the day with Bello, hopefully, he’ll take our bait and want to set up a meet with Odin after what happened with the Caza torpedo.” Mike says after a mouthful of toast, pointing at you as you roll your eyes at his first sentence.
“I can act as a middleman if Bello wants. You know I’ve already got a cover with him so it would be no water off my back.” Briggs says simply, crossing over to Mike, taking the second slice of toast off Mike’s plate and beginning to eat it despite Mike’s protests. Just before you can respond, one of the burner phones in your pocket rings and you pull it out, sighing as you recognise the number, holding up a finger to silence the bickering between Briggs and Mike as you step away to answer the call.
“What’s up?” You say into the phone, moving to stand near the large windows overlooking the beach, watching as the world goes by.
“Yo, y/n, I’ve been running low on stuff lately and the people from Caza are basically refusing to send it to me, saying something like I’ve been playing them or some bullshit. I need to go to Mexico to meet with some guys there and I’d feel much better having you come with me, I mean you’re badass and can hold your own. Can you come?” You hear the familiar voice of Luca ask, rambling as he fights to contain his nerves. You knew Luca had been rising the ranks among drug dealers and that could’ve been part of the reason why Caza asked him to meet face to face. You had a slight bad feeling grow in your stomach as you think over his question, worrying about what might happen to you but after a minute or two of silent debate, you push the bad feeling aside to prioritise the mission.
“I’ll come.” You say finally, hearing the relieved sigh from the other end of the line.
“Can you get over to mine as soon as possible? We need to hit the road as soon as we can.” Luca asks and you nod slightly before remembering he can’t see you.
“Yeah, sure, I’ll get there as quickly as I can.” You say, listening as Luca thanks you quickly before abruptly hanging up, leaving you staring out the window with the phone in hand.
“Is everything okay?” You hear Mike ask, turning to face the two who are watching you worriedly.
“Luca’s got a meeting with Caza in Mexico and he’s asked me to come with him.” You say, not missing how Briggs and Mike exchanged a look between them.
“You better be careful out there. If Caza brings Jangles you get out of there before anything goes wrong.” Briggs says, striding towards you and placing his hands on your shoulders so he could look you in the eyes.
“I know. I’ll be careful.” You say softly, offering Briggs a small smile to reassure him that you’ll be okay.
“I expect regular contact from you every day you’re gone just so we can confirm you’re okay. Does that sound like a plan?” Briggs continues, folding his arms across his chest, letting his protectiveness seep into his voice.
“That’s fine, I can do that. I’ll only have this burner phone with me but I’ll contact you when I get a chance to. Promise.” You swear, watching Briggs carefully as he drops his chin to his chest, sighing softly.
“You better go get ready, huh? We’ll see you off.” Briggs says quietly, looking up at you and smiling softly as you nod. You then head upstairs to your room, dig out some clothes to wear, pack a small bag and make sure you have your gun and ammo as well as conceal your FBI badge and ID deep in your bag just in case you need it at all. When you’re satisfied that you have everything you need, you make your way back down the stairs and see Briggs and Mike waiting with small smiles on their faces.
“Don’t let the house fall apart without me, boys.” You tease, continuing to push your worry aside to appear confident in front of your friends.
“We’ll try our best,” Mike replies, bringing you in for a hug.
“Also I better not miss out on sauce night. I might never recover if I do.” You joke as you pull away from the hug, looking from Mike to Briggs.
“You know Charlie could never hold sauce night without everyone in attendance. Don’t worry.” Briggs says, tugging you into a hug of his own.
“That’s a relief. I guess I’ll see you guys in a week or so.” You say with a small smile, adjusting your bag and leaving Graceland, taking a deep breath as you exit the house before you make your way in the direction of Luca’s house.
After three days, you stopped communicating.
“Have you heard anything from y/n?” Briggs asks early one morning when he notices everyone gathered in the kitchen as Johnny makes pancakes. Briggs feels anxiety clawing at his stomach when he gets nothing but shaking heads and murmuring ‘no’s’ in response.
“I thought she said she’d message you daily?” Mike asks, his attention drawn from watching Johnny to where Briggs is standing.
“She hasn’t messaged me in a couple of days. I thought there’d be a chance she messaged one of you guys instead.” Briggs says worriedly, watching as everyone slowly realises that something may be wrong.
“She’s not said a thing to anyone?” Charlie asks, her jaw clenching when she sees everyone continuing to shake their heads.
“Okay well, we gotta get the cops involved, right?” Johnny asks, shutting the stove off, abandoning the pancakes and glancing from person to person.
“We definitely have to contact the police in Mexico and see if they can find someone fitting her description. I’ll go down there myself and oversee any investigation.” Briggs starts, and everyone begins to scramble into action.
“I’ll head to some of the local stations around here. If y/n ends up stateside without contacting us I’d feel better knowing that the LAPD are on the lookout for her as well.” Charlie says, grabbing her jacket and tugging it on.
“I’ll do the same. We can cover more stations that way.” Paige says, rushing to grab all her belongings so she can head out.
“I’ll go to the Bureau and report this. I’ll let them know what we’re all doing.” Mike says as he gestures for Johnny to follow him.
“Jakes, do you think you could get ICE involved? Keep an eye on people coming out of the border, especially if there’s someone who matches Luca’s description.” Briggs asks, pointing at Jakes who nods quickly, grabs his phone, and dials a number on his phone before getting up and moving away for some quiet. After everyone figures out what they’re going to do, they all rush out of Graceland, making their separate ways to start searches for you.
Charlie was the one to enter Mid-Wilshire, immediately making a beeline for Grey’s office, her urgency catching the attention of Tim and Lucy as they stood near Angela’s desk, listening to her explain the details of a case she had been working on.
“Agent DeMarco, can I help you?” Grey asks as Charlie enters the office, glancing up from his computer as she enters.
“One of our agents has gone missing. She went to Mexico undercover just over a week ago and we haven’t received any communication from her in a few days.” Charlie starts, explaining the situation as Grey raises an eyebrow.
“Respectfully Agent DeMarco, if someone has gone missing in Mexico, surely you should be contacting the Mexican police? We don’t have jurisdiction in other countries.” Grey asks, leaning back in his chair as Charlie sighs, crossing her arms.
“Briggs is already covering that front. We just want to make as many stations in LA aware. If y/n somehow ends up stateside and for some reason has no way to contact any of us at Graceland, I’d feel better knowing the LAPD are keeping an eye out for her.” Charlie explains further, watching as Grey nods slowly.
“I see. Well, we can get an APB out for her, but again since she went missing in Mexico we can only cover LA. But we will do what we can.” Grey says as Charlie nods.
“We’ll take any help we can get. We’re just worried about her.” She admits, fiddling with her fingers as a way to channel her anxiety. After giving Grey a description of you as well as the information she knew about Luca just in case he reappeared without you, Charlie exits Grey’s office, almost walking straight into Tim who had begun to mingle near the office.
“Agent DeMarco, is everything okay?” Tim asks, his hands resting on his gun belt as he watches Charlie shake her head.
“y/n is missing,” Charlie says, noticing how quickly Tim tensed up, his mouth dropping open slightly in shock as he tried to figure out a way to respond.
“You’re sure she’s missing?” Tim asks quickly, stammering and falling over his words, hoping that it was nothing more than a cruel prank being played on him.
“Positive. She promised Briggs that she’d be in contact daily and she hasn’t contacted any of us for a couple of days now.” Charlie says, explaining to Tim what she had just told Grey moments ago.
“Is there anything we can do? There has to be something, right?” Tim asks desperately watching for any kind of response from Charlie who just shrugs.
“There’s not much that can be done from here. The LAPD doesn’t have any kind of jurisdiction outside of LA but Briggs is in Mexico trying to start some sort of investigation but we’re just asking the LAPD to keep an eye out for her in case she somehow ends up back in LA without any of us knowing.” Charlie says simply, missing how Tim gritted his teeth, bowing his head in frustration.
“If you need any help. I’m more than willing to help.” Tim offers, looking back up at Charlie who offers Tim a soft smile.
“Thank you,” Charlie says softly, her smile encouraging Tim to give her a smile of his own, albeit forced. Charlie then carefully dismisses herself, making her way out of Mid-Wilshire station to go to the next station, leaving Tim standing in the middle of the room alone.
“Tim, what’s going on?” Lucy asks, approaching Tim after having watched his and Charlie’s interaction from afar.
“y/n’s missing.” Is all Tim can bring himself to say, unable to remove his gaze from the door Charlie had just left through.
“What? How do they know? Can we help at all?” Lucy asks, worry crossing her face as Tim finally turns to face her, shaking his head solemnly.
“There’s not much we can do. She went missing in Mexico. We’ve only been told to just keep an eye out for her in case she somehow ends up stateside without anyone in Graceland knowing.” Tim says, watching as Lucy fights back a frown.
“There has to be something, right? I mean you went to Guatemala to save Angela.” Lucy says, trying to come up with something that they could do to help you.
“That was to save one of our own and even then it was hard to convince Grey to let us go along with that plan. We won’t be able to get involved unless the Feds want us involved.” Tim says with a shake of his head, knowing just how impossible it would be to try and get involved. Despite that, he began to think, a single idea coming to mind before suddenly walking off, leaving Lucy confused and standing alone.
At a gas station, Briggs was filling his Bronco up with gas when his phone began to ring, and he quickly dug in his pocket, his heart pounding as he pulled the phone out of his pocket, hoping you were on the other end of the phone when he didn’t recognise the number.
“Hello?” Briggs asks, unusually anxious as he awaits an answer from the other end.
“Agent Briggs, it’s Officer Tim Bradford.” Briggs couldn’t help but let out a small sigh of disappointment at the voice. He had no ill feelings towards Tim, he just wished it had been you calling, telling him you were okay.
“Officer Bradford, what can I do for you?” Briggs asks, leaning against his Bronco as he stares up at the sky from behind his sunglasses. He found it unusually cruel for the day to be so sunny and cheerful when you were missing.
“I heard about y/n being missing and I want to help,” Tim says, pacing back and forth anxiously as he talks. He denied it to anyone who brought it up but he did harbour feelings for you, and you being missing and potentially hurt made his heart hurt.
“Respectfully, this isn’t really an LAPD matter. We only informed you guys just in case she ends up stateside.” Briggs starts, trying to let Tim down gently.
“I don’t care. I want to do what I can to help y/n.” Tim demands, ceasing in his pacing as his voice raises slightly, causing Briggs to raise his eyebrows slightly in impressed shock. He knew Tim cared for you, but now he was getting to see the protectiveness Tim had for you, a side neither man knew he harboured for you.
“Look man, I don’t know what your boss will say about it but if you really want to help me… I won’t stop you. I’m just filling my car up for the journey, you can meet me here and we can head to Mexico together.” Briggs finally says, respecting Tim’s drive to help and deciding that ultimately it would be safer if he and Tim teamed up as opposed to working separately.
“Where are you? I’ll swing by as soon as I can.” Tim asks, already prepping a lie about a family emergency as Briggs lets him know which gas station he is at. With Briggs’ location shared, Tim hung up the phone, ready to leave the station.
It took Tim about half an hour to get to the gas station Briggs was at after leaving the station. He had to make a quick pit stop home to pack a bag and call Genny to ask if she could look after Kojo while he was gone, letting her know where his spare key was so she could swing by whenever she could to collect him. As soon as Tim was confident he was sorted, he walked to the gas station, quickly recognising Briggs who gestured him over.
“Thanks for letting me tag along. I just feel so useless sitting by and doing nothing.” Tim thanks Briggs as they shake hands.
“Glad to see you care about y/n. But I do have to lay down some ground rules. I’m in charge here. What I say goes no matter what. I also trust you can look after yourself. Technically speaking you’re not supposed to be here and I don’t want you getting hurt or killed on my watch.” Briggs says as the two make their way towards his car.
“Of course, whatever you say goes,” Tim says with a nod, getting into the passenger seat while Briggs gets behind the wheel and begins the journey to Mexico.
The journey to Mexico was long, and Briggs and Tim weren’t quite sure how to hold a conversation together other than talking about how to try and find you. By the time they had made it to Mexico, they’d managed to set a game plan on how they’d go about starting the investigation when they made it to the police station nearest to where you had been. Upon arriving at the police station, both Briggs and Tim exit the vehicle making their way into the building and approaching the front desk. Briggs strikes up a conversation in Spanish with the officer working at the front desk while Tim stands back, listening carefully to what is being said. When the officer finds out that they’ve come from LA, he begins to talk in English, figuring it would be easier.
“So, you said you had a missing agent, huh?” The officer asks after introducing himself as Miguel as he leads the two men through the station.
“That’s correct, she told me she was in the area for a meeting with a Caza member and she’s failed to get into contact with us for a couple of days,” Briggs confirms, nodding as they reach a desk.
“I see. Well, I’ll get some men to call around local coroners offices and hospitals, so if you could give me a description and a name that would be helpful.” Miguel then says, glancing at Briggs who nods, giving him a full description of you and your name while Tim’s jaw tightens, eyes squeezing shut as he envisions you hurt or dead somewhere. Once Briggs gives out all the needed information, Miguel excuses himself to make some calls.
“We should start searching the area, right?” Tim asks the moment the two of them are left alone.
“We probably shouldn’t do anything without an okay from the Federales,” Briggs says, turning to look at Tim who watches Briggs, confused.
“She could be out there. Hurt. Alone. Afraid. And you’re just going to wait?” Tim asks incredulously staring at Briggs, shocked.
“y/n is tougher than you think. If she’s out there she’ll be able to handle herself. You agreed that you’d listen to everything I say and I’m saying we wait until the Federales say we can, and they’d be able to help us since they have more knowledge of the area.” Briggs says firmly, turning to face Tim properly. Both men stand face to face, Tim’s jaw clenching further as he glares at Briggs. Now that they were in Mexico, Tim’s agreement to listen to Briggs’ words went out the window. Tim was too worried about you and wanted nothing more than to just get out onto the streets and look for you. He was frustrated that Briggs was willing to break the rules enough to let him tag along but then the moment they could do any investigation he suddenly wanted to wait. Deep down, Tim knew Briggs was being rational, and that it would be best for them to get information from the Federales about where they could begin to look, but that rational thought was overtaken by Tim’s burning drive to find you and get you back to LA safe.
After some painful minutes of pacing and waiting for anyone to help, Miguel returned with his phone in hand.
“There is no one matching her description or name in any hospitals or morgues.” He informs the two, watching as Tim lets out a slight sigh, relieved to hear that you weren’t dead in a morgue anywhere. But you were still missing.
“Okay, so what’s our next play? We gotta get out on the streets and look for her, right?” Tim asks, looking between Briggs and Miguel, eyes searching desperately for an answer.
“That would be the next course of action, yes. You said she came for a meeting with Caza, correct?” Miguel asks, turning to Briggs who nods quickly to confirm.
“Yeah, someone she was undercover with was invited for a meeting with Caza. I don’t think either of them knew what they were getting into but if Jangles was involved…” Briggs trails off, eyes squeezing shut as he envisions what could’ve happened to you if Jangles was involved.
“Jangles? Who’s Jangles?” Tim asks worriedly, noticing the increased tension in the room.
“We call him ‘El Hombre Llave’ here.” Miguel says, looking over at Tim who only grows more confused.
“The Key Man?” Tim translates the name easily, but still not fully understanding the significance of the name.
“Named as such because he’s known for carrying around the keys of his victims. Us Feds call him Jangles on account of the sound of all those keys jangling. He’s Caza’s attack dog, if there’s someone they don’t like, don’t trust. There’s a high chance Jangles will come after them.” Briggs explains further, noticing how Tim grew more worried at what was said.
“You’re telling me that there’s potentially a killer out there after y/n? And I’m only finding this out now?” Tim asks, dumbfounded as he watches the two men carefully.
“Look, man, you’re not FBI so you didn’t know about Jangles and I was, and still am, hoping he wasn’t involved. For y/n’s sake more than anything.” Briggs explains, holding his hands up to try and keep the peace between the two of them.
“So, you were just planning on not telling me about the fact that this cartel has a guy they send to do their dirty work?” Tim asks, his voice raising as he addresses Briggs, completely thrown by the fact that Briggs was willing to keep such a vital piece of information from him when it would’ve been useful to know earlier, especially when a person of interest was dubbed as an ‘attack dog’ for the cartel you were investigating.
“Do I need to remind you of the rules we established? I’m in charge and I don’t have to tell you shit.” Briggs says firmly, stepping closer to Tim, the two men standing in a face-off.
“Whoa, please calm down you two. We need to focus on finding your agent.” Miguel says quickly, gaining the attention of both men as they back down, although still continuing to glare at each other.
“You’re right. Is there anywhere we can start our search?”
After three days of searching, Briggs and Tim found no clues to your whereabouts and the Federales began to draw the line, saying that the search efforts may be in vain. Neither man wanted to give up but they also knew they couldn’t keep wasting resources and police time. After the three days had passed, the two men were forced to return to LA, empty-handed and dejected. When Briggs made it back to Graceland, he saw the hopeful expressions that were quickly shot down by the shake of his head. Despite the failed search in Mexico, Tim continued to keep an eye out for you on his patrols, hoping you’d miraculously turn up.
Four days after Briggs and Tim returned to LA. You turned up at Graceland.
You stumbled into the house, pale, clammy, and shivering, but you were home. You made an immediate beeline for the kitchen, your throat screaming for water. You could barely focus on what was around you as you fumbled for a glass, knocking some things over as you tried to turn the water on to fill your glass. Once the glass was half filled with water, you turned the tap off, took a quick refreshing sip of water and made your way to the couch, placing the glass down before collapsing on the couch, letting out the smallest sighs of relief at the familiar comfort of the cushions. Just after your eyes slipped closed, you heard the familiar sounds of someone coming down the stairs, and whoever it was, wasn’t doing the best job at attempting to be stealthy. Your eyes peeled open as you looked over at your shoulder, smiling weakly when you locked eyes with Johnny who paused on the stairs as he stared at you, gun in hand.
“You know there’s no guns downstairs Johnny.” You laugh with a wince as a spark of pain shoots through you.
“y/n? Holy shit.” Johnny says, immediately putting his gun down and rushing over to you.
“Hey Johnny.” You say weakly as Johnny sits on the couch alongside you, pulling you into his arms for a hug.
“Where the hell have you been, girl?” Johnny asks, cradling your head against his chest, letting out the smallest sigh of relief that you’re alive.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m home now.” You whisper, clinging to Johnny, wincing slightly as you adjust yourself.
“We gotta get you to a hospital.” Johnny suddenly says, pulling away as you shake your head, ignoring the lightheadedness that comes with it.
“No. No, I’m fine. No hospitals Johnny. Please.” You plead quietly, watching Johnny carefully as he falls silent, debating what he should do before he sighs softly and nods.
“Okay. No hospitals.” He concedes, looking at you as you smile.
“Thank you. I just need a shower and a nap I’m sure I’ll be fine in no time.” You say, laughing lightly as you gesture at yourself to lightly mock your appearance.
“I wasn’t going to say anything but..” Johnny says cheekily, laughing as you roll your eyes, bracing your hands either side of yourself and easing yourself up onto your feet, wincing once more at the spark of pain that flies through you.
“Hey, I got you,” Johnny says quickly, leaping to his feet, wrapping one of your arms around his middle and helping you up the stairs, guiding you carefully up to your room so he could help you grab some clean clothes and a towel before helping you to the bathroom.
“I got it from here, Johnny. Thank you.” You say gratefully as you stop outside the door to the bathroom.
“If you need me just shout. I’m going to contact the others and let them know you’re home.” Johnny says, carefully helping you unwind your arm from around him, letting you go with a smile. When you enter the bathroom and lock the door you instantly turn the shower on, letting it warm up while you strip down, catching sight of your battered and bruised body, looking at each injury in turn until your eyes land on the bruises on the inside of your arm, biting back tears when you look at them. You spend a few minutes staring at the bruises before you bring yourself back to reality and get into the shower. You relax as the hot water rushes over you, the water slowly dyeing pink as you scrub the blood, both dried and wet off your body. You scrub at every inch of you, a desperate attempt to cleanse yourself of what you had been through over the last few days. After a long shower, you get into your sweatpants and loose shirt, heading to your room to throw your stuff into your laundry basket before grabbing a hoodie to hide your injuries even more. Once you were changed you once more caught sight of yourself in the mirror and you couldn’t help but wince slightly at how pale and clammy you looked. All you could do was hope you’d be able to play it up to what you had been through. Shaking your head lightly with a sigh, you head downstairs where Johnny is in the kitchen cooking.
“Cooking are we?” You ask teasingly, leaning against the wall by the stairs to the kitchen as a wave of nausea hits you.
“You don’t look like you’ve eaten much recently. Plus, I know you’ve been missing my cooking.” Johnny says, looking over at you and shooting you a quick wink, his smile faltering slightly when he sees how rough you look.
“Hey, why don’t you relax on the couch? The others should be back soon.” Johnny says, his hand hovering over the handle of the pan as he debates abandoning the food to help you over to the couch.
“I might do that, yeah.” You mumble, easing yourself away from the wall and making your way over to the couch, lying across it, shoving a cushion under your head and lying an arm across your eyes to shield them from the bright sunlight coming from the large windows. You squeeze your eyes shut in another attempt to close the overwhelming light out. After about ten minutes of lying on your back, listening to Johnny humming to himself as he cooks, you hear the front door fly open.
“Is she here?” You hear Briggs say, calling through the house, making your eyes peel open as you prop yourself up on your elbows smiling weakly over at Briggs.
“Over here.” You call over, your voice weak but Briggs hears you, rushing over and pulling you into a tight hug.
“Didn’t realise you’d missed me that much.” You then say, attempting to keep your voice light as Briggs hugs you tighter, making you wince silently but not wanting to break the embrace.
“You’re family y/n, of course, I missed you,” Briggs says softly, kissing the top of your head affectionately.
“I missed you guys too.” You reply, listening to Briggs’ rapid heartbeat begin to slow as he holds you close.
“You look like shit, is everything okay?” Briggs asks worriedly, pulling away slightly to take in your rough appearance as you laugh weakly.
“You really know the way to a woman’s heart, Briggs.” You joke as you hear the door open once more, this time looking over to see Charlie and Mike entering the house, seeing you and Briggs and rushing over.
“Hey, Chuck.” You mumble, smoothly transferring yourself from Briggs’ embrace to Charlie’s who holds you close, running a hand through your hair.
“What happened to you, Baby?” Charlie asks, her maternal instincts kicking in as she cradles you, shifting her hand from your hair to your chin, cupping it softly so she can look you in the eye.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine.” You say quietly, trying to reassure her that you are okay, smiling softly at her as Mike eases himself down on the couch.
“Mikey, you’re not missing out on this, " you say, gesturing him closer as Charlie carefully releases you from her embrace, swapping places with Mike so he can give you a hug.
“It’s so good to have you back,” Mike says softly, hugging you carefully as you smile, grateful to be back with the people you love.
“I bet I’ve missed out on sauce night, huh?” You ask, glancing between everyone, pulling away from Mike slightly but staying close enough that his arm stayed wrapped around you.
“Never. We could never hold sauce night without you.” Charlie says reassuringly, reaching across to rub a gentle hand up and down your arm, making you sigh with a soft laugh.
“You know, we’re not the only ones who missed you,” Mike says with an amused smile, glancing around at everyone before focusing on you.
“Was it someone outside the house?” You ask quietly, watching everyone’s reactions carefully, your heart rate begins to pick up as you start to hope who it was.
“That Tim Bradford of yours wouldn’t stop pestering us. He damn near demanded I brought him to Mexico with me when we first figured out you’d gone missing. That man’s got it bad for you.” Briggs explains with a laugh, watching as your eyebrows furrow slightly, looking up at him.
“Please tell me you didn’t actually let Tim come to Mexico with you.” You ask, worried about what could’ve possibly happened to Tim. Before Briggs could reply, you heard the door open.
“Levi, you better not be hogging y/n all to yourself.” You hear Jakes call, rushing into your line of sight as Mike rolls his eyes, gently letting you wiggle free from his embrace so you can lean forward and give Jakes a hug as you think about how you need to visit Tim soon to let him know you were okay.
“Paige said she was too deep into her case at the moment to come home right now but you know she’ll be here the moment she’s able to,” Johnny says, entering the living room with a plate of food and cutlery, handing it to you with a gentle smile.
“Somehow I don’t doubt it.” You reply, smiling as you take the plate, leaning back against the couch cushions so you can eat. You only manage a couple of mouthfuls of food before you begin to feel nauseous. You place the plate down with a trembling hand and get up from the couch.
“Sorry Johnny, the food is lovely I just don’t have as much appetite as I thought. I might go for a nap, actually.” You say apologetically, dismissing yourself and heading up the stairs, trying to contain each wince that flashes across your face each step you take.
When you make it to your room, you collapse on your bed, curling up as you shiver. All you could think about was what the cartel had left you, how much you regretted using it so quickly, and how you wanted more. Even as you tried to nap it was all you could think about as you tossed and turned. As your brain screams at you, unable to rest for even a second, you eventually push the covers back, crossing to your desk and digging through the drawers desperately to try to find one of the many burner phones you had stashed away. When you finally found one, you quickly discovered that it had run out of battery making you slam your hand on your desk angrily with a frustrated grunt before you dug around in your drawers further, managing to find a charger and shakily rushing to the nearest outlet, your hands barely able to stay still long enough to plug into the port. As soon as the phone was charging, you sat on the edge of your bed, knee bouncing erratically as you waited for the phone to power on.
The second the phone began to power on, you fumbled through the contacts, searching for the right number before you hurriedly typed out a message, your shaking fingers causing you to make multiple typos, your muddled mind barely processing any of it as you hit send, desperation clinging to every fibre of your body.
Mere seconds after you hit send, you hear footsteps approaching your room and you hurriedly shove the phone out of eyesight, diving under the cover just as the door to your room opens and the person on the other side knocks lightly. You feigned waking up as you glanced over your shoulder to see Paige entering carefully.
“y/n, you’re okay!” Paige says, relief crossing her features as she locks eyes with you.
“That I am.” You say with a small smile, lowering yourself back down to the pillow and curling up again, hoping Paige will get the hint.
“What happened to you? Where were you?” Paige then asks, her expression worried as she regards you.
“I’m not quite ready to talk about it yet, Paige. I’m exhausted and just want to rest. I promise I’ll come down when I feel up to it.” You mumble, burying your face further into the pillow.
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I’m just glad you’re home.” Paige says quickly and apologetically, beginning to close the door, whispering a quick apology before closing the door behind her, leaving you alone once more.
The second the door closed, your phone buzzed lightly, sending you scrambling out from under the covers, hand flailing for the phone as you pulled it closer to you. Your eyes hurriedly scan the screen, desperately focusing on the message, hoping you were getting the response you wanted. When you had processed the message, you let out a small sigh of relief, your body relaxing properly for what felt like the first time since you walked back through the doors of Graceland. All you had to do now was bide your time and then you’d get what you’ve been desperately craving, knowing you had to make sure that no one else found out about it.
A few days after you returned from Mexico, you finally got the courage to go and visit Tim to let him know you were okay. It was nerve-wracking to be stepping back into Mid-Wilshire, especially when you weren’t back on duty yet. You made your way to the front desk, awkwardly standing in front of it for a moment until you got the attention of the officer working there.
“Can I help you?” He asks with a raised eyebrow, eyes flicking from you to the paperwork in front of him, barely paying you much attention.
“I was just wondering if Officer Bradford was in?” You ask, an unusual sheepishness to your voice as you speak, fidgeting with your fingers and fighting the urge to shuffle.
“Why do you need to see him?” The officer asks with a sigh, looking bored and ready to send you away.
“I’m a friend.” You say, shoving your hands in your jacket pockets, your thumb brushing alongside your badge. You knew you could just use your badge, say it was an FBI matter but you also knew that you couldn’t risk putting people on high alert just so you could see Tim. You were also pretty sure that even with your badge the officer on the other side of the desk wouldn’t believe you with how rough you looked. Your split lip was still healing, you were pale and shaking, and you had obvious bags under your eyes. You wouldn’t have been surprised if the officer began to attempt to arrest you with your appearance the way it was.
“A friend, huh? Look, lady, I don’t know who you’re trying to fool here but if you think I’m supposed to believe that you are a friend of Tim Bradford’s, you’ve got another thing coming.” The officer says, rolling his eyes as he focuses on the paperwork before him, and as he talks, your gaze begins to wander, hoping by some miracle you’d be able to talk yourself out of this situation. Just as all hope seems lost, Tim walks in, ready to address someone but halting in his tracks completely when he notices you, jaw dropping open as he stares.
“Hey, Tim.” You say softly, not really sure of what to say to him.
“y/n? What? How did you? Where did you? Are you really back?” Tim stammers, unable to form a proper sentence as he refuses to remove his gaze from you.
“I’m here, Tim.” You say as Tim begins to take small, tentative steps towards you, stopping just in front of you as he regards you softly.
“Can I…?” Tim asks, unable to finish his sentence but despite that, you knew what he was asking for so you stepped closer, winding your arms around his middle and hugging him lightly, feeling his arms wrap around you, pulling you a little closer.
“I would’ve come by sooner but the Bureau wanted to ask me some questions first and quite frankly I’ve been feeling like shit.” You say quietly, relishing the feeling of how Tim’s arms wound around you so perfectly. Tim held you in a way that made you feel protected and made you believe that everything would be okay.
“I’ve been so worried about you,” Tim confesses quietly, his voice soft as he speaks, his lips brushing up against the shell of your ear.
“I’m sorry for worrying you. I promise I didn’t do it on purpose.” You make a weak attempt at a joke as Tim holds you a little tighter, somehow attuned to your unhealed injuries and not wishing to hurt you further.
“I know you didn’t. But it didn’t make me worry any less.” Tim says, unafraid to admit his worry to you.
“I’m sorry.” You repeat, shifting slightly so you can look at Tim properly as he shakes his head lightly.
“Don’t apologise. It wasn’t your fault. Hey, look I was just about to go on lunch, come with me. We can catch up and lunch will be on me.” Tim says, pulling away slightly, his hands moving up to gently hold you by the shoulders as he watches you softly.
“Tim I don’t want to impose…” you say nervously, watching as Tim shakes his head once more.
“I want you to join me. I’ve missed you.” Tim insists, his unusually soft eyes pleading with you as you silently consider his offer before sighing lightly, your head bowing.
“Okay. I’ll come.” You say as you look back up at Tim who smiles, leading you out of the station and taking you to a small food truck nearby, letting you sit at one of the tables while he orders the food for the both of you. It doesn’t take Tim long to return to the table, placing the two meals down on the table as you smile and thank him before digging in.
“What do you think of the food?” Tim asks after a few minutes of silent eating.
“It’s good. It’s no Hector’s but it’s pretty good regardless.” You admit with a nod, making Tim’s eyebrows furrow slightly.
“Hector’s? I don’t think I’ve heard of that.” Tim muses, stabbing at his food with the small plastic fork in his hand as your jaw drops open in shock.
“You don’t know Hector’s Tacos? It’s just the best taco truck in LA. Everyone at Graceland loves it. I’ll have to take you there someday. You haven’t truly lived until you’ve tried Hector’s Tacos.” You say with a laugh, watching as Tim nods with a chuckle.
“I’ll hold you to that,” Tim says jokingly, pointing at you as you laugh, rolling your eyes.
You spend about twenty minutes with Tim, falling back into your natural rhythm and you find yourself almost distracted from the nagging desperation in the back of your head until you feel your phone buzz in your pocket. You dug it out of your jacket and looked down at the screen, expecting it to be a text from someone from Graceland but instead, you saw a number you recognised all too quickly. You sat up a little straighter, your focus now entirely on the screen as you hurriedly type a response, getting to your feet.
“I’m so sorry, Tim. I have to go. This was amazing and we have to do it again someday.” You say, barely looking up at Tim who didn’t even have a chance to say anything before you darted off, leaving Tim alone and confused.
When most of the agents made their way back to Graceland after a long day at work, they were all expecting to find you somewhere within the house but instead, the house was quiet, with no sign of you anywhere.
“Yo, has anyone seen y/n?” Briggs asks as he comes downstairs after conducting a search for you upstairs.
“Nah, man. Last I heard she was going to try and visit Tim. Maybe things went so well they’ve wound up at his place.” Johnny says, ignoring the groans of his housemates as he laughs.
“As much as I’d love for those two to grow up and confess their feelings for each other I doubt that’s the case. y/n’s been through a lot recently, I can’t imagine that she’d want to confess her feelings now of all times and I’d like to think that Tim is enough of a gentleman not to do anything like that while she’s recovering.” Charlie says, lightly slapping Johnny on the back of the head as she talks.
“I agree. Maybe they’re just catching up? Talking to Tim is probably the best way for her to just get away from everything so I can’t blame her for wanting a few hours out of the house.” Paige says, defending you from the accusations even when you’re not around to hear her.
“She makes a good point. I’d want a few hours away from us too. Especially when she can’t get involved with work right now.” Jakes says with a shrug, taking a sip from his glass of freshly poured orange juice.
“Maybe…” Briggs mutters to himself, turning away from the others and crossing to the window so he could overlook the beach. The waves were big, a perfect day for surfing which is what Briggs would’ve been tempted to do had he not been concerned about you. He had been keeping close tabs on you since you got back to Graceland and he wasn’t glad to be recognising the signs you were displaying.
When you didn’t come back to the house until the next day, most of the team had become convinced that you were just spending the night with Tim but Briggs was still convinced that his hypothesis was correct despite what the others thought but he wasn’t prepared to jump to conclusions just yet. He wanted to be certain that he was in fact right before he tried to bring the topic up with you.
Over the next few days, Briggs did his best to keep close tabs on you. He’d question you when he found you attempting to sneak out of Graceland late at night after everyone else had gone to bed. You’d always use the same excuse every time you were caught, claiming you just wanted to clear your head and go for a late-night walk along the beach. After hearing the same excuse five times in a row, Briggs knew he had to follow you to get to the bottom of what was going on with you. Thankfully, on the night Briggs had chosen to follow you, you were so hyper-focused on where you were going that you had neglected to remember any of your FBI training when it came to making sure you weren’t being tailed. Briggs followed you through the back alleys and various neighbourhoods until he stopped, watching you enter a run-down house, knocking on the door and being let in by the guy on the other side of the door.
Briggs spent the whole night sitting on a curb, waiting for you to come out of the house, his leg bouncing anxiously as he worries about what condition you’ll be in when you come out. As the sun begins to rise, you emerge from the building. You look rough, like you’d been through the wringer.
“y/n!” Briggs called over to you, getting up from where he’d been sitting and crossing to you. You’d barely had time to process that he was there and that by the time he crossed to you, any hope of running away was gone.
“What are you doing here?” You ask, shocked as Briggs winds a protective arm around you, escorting you away from the building.
“I’m worried about you. What’s going on with you?” Briggs asks worriedly, leading you along streets you didn’t recognise, his walk hurried as he ushers you along.
“Nothing’s going on with me. What are you talking about?” You ask, trying to convince Briggs that he was reading into everything too much.
“Answer me this, what were you doing all night? It’s not like you to sneak off in the middle of the night and go somewhere as dodgy as this.” Briggs says, abruptly stopping in his tracks, turning to face you, an action you mirror as he moves to hold you by the shoulders to keep you in place.
“I was just… visiting a friend?” You attempt weakly, your shoulders slumping when Briggs shakes his head with a sigh.
“I thought being an undercover agent would make you a better liar. Look y/n/n, I’m worried about you. I have my suspicions about what’s going on with you. I’m hoping I’m wrong so I’m going to give you this one chance to prove to me that I’m wrong and you’re doing something else.” Briggs says, his voice was soft and concerned. A vulnerability you rarely see from him displayed all over his face as he talks.
“What do you think I’ve been doing?” You ask nervously, tears beginning to well in your eyes as you worry about what Briggs could accuse you of. You were especially terrified that if he had sussed you out, he was going to go running to the Bureau and report you, which would obviously lead to you losing your job.
“I think you’ve been sneaking out to go get yourself high,” Briggs says, his voice unexpectedly soft as he looks you in the eye. At Briggs’ gentle tone and lack of judgement, the built-up tears begin to spill down your cheeks.
“Please don’t tell anyone.” You whimper, tears sliding down your cheeks as your teeth clamp down on your lower lip to stop it from trembling violently.
“I won’t tell a soul. But I can’t let you keep going like this. This is dangerous for you and the house. I’m going to help you but I need you to trust me. Can you do that for me?” Briggs says, his voice never straying from the soft tone he had been using to talk to you as if he was talking to a scared child. In response to his question, you nod, more tears dribbling down your cheeks as Briggs smiles gently.
“I trust you.” You whisper, making Briggs nod slightly.
“Okay, let’s go. I’ve got someplace private we can talk.” Briggs then says, wrapping his arm around your shoulders again so he could lead you to where he knew you’d get some privacy.
Briggs takes you to a small apartment building, it was run down and clearly not maintained unlike the luxury you were used to in Graceland but you weren’t one to complain, especially when Briggs was helping you in your time of need. Upon entering the apartment, Briggs eases you down on the bed before sitting alongside you, angling himself so he can face you.
“I don’t want to push you but I think now is as good a time as any to explain what happened to you and what’s got you hooked on drugs,” Briggs says, watching as you nod lightly, lifting your hand to wipe away the fallen tears with shaking hands.
“The meet in Mexico was a setup. They… they killed Luca right in front of me. I know he was a drug dealer but he wasn’t a bad guy. He didn’t deserve to go out like that. I thought I was going to be next the moment I registered that they’d killed him but instead they just took me somewhere. I woke up tied to a chair and then…”
“Jangles walked in.” Briggs finishes your sentence when you become too overwhelmed to speak. Upon realising what Briggs had said, your eyes widen slightly and you stare at him with glassy eyes.
“How did you…?” You question, eyes fixed on Briggs as you wonder about how he could’ve possibly known that Jangles was involved in the whole thing.
“Because they did the same to me years ago,” Briggs admits, finding himself confessing something that no one else in the house, other than Mike, was aware of.
“What?” You ask quietly, questioning yourself on whether you heard him correctly.
“Before Graceland, there was another safe house for Feds, I lived there and my training officer was deep undercover with Caza, I’m talking about getting invited to Sunday dinners and the mother was calling him mijo. I stupidly decided to go to Mexico on an unauthorised mission and got myself caught by Caza. They must’ve known that I was FBI. They periodically got me high to the point of addiction and then left me for long enough that I was begging for more, but they never asked me anything. Once they got me hooked on heroin they had no more use for me, they just let me go but not without leaving me a ‘goodbye high’. It was definitely their way to get at the Bureau and clearly it got to their head if they’ve done something similar to you. You didn’t give anything away, did you?” Briggs explains, reliving the things he had been through in recent years and how much it hurt to give up someone he cared for, especially just because they got him hooked on heroin. In response to Briggs’ question, you shake your head.
“No. They didn’t ask me a single thing. They just came in, shot me up and then left. I think deep down they knew I was an agent so I’m shocked they didn’t kill me.” You confess quietly, more tears continuing to fall down your cheeks as you talk.
“It was another chance for them to stick it to the Bureau. They seem to find some sick pleasure in turning agents into addicts. They know that if word gets out about it, any and all cases we’ve ever worked would be reopened for investigation.” Briggs says, his voice reassuring as he wraps an arm around you and tugging you gently into his side.
“I thought I could beat it alone. Every time I left I told myself that it would be the last time, that I could stop whenever I wanted but every time I’d try I’d give in so quickly.” You admit tearily, leaning your head against Briggs’ shoulder as he rubs a reassuring hand up and down your arm.
“I know. It’s really easy to convince yourself that it’s that easy to just up and quit whenever you’re ready but it’s really not. And the fact you’ve opened up to me and you’re willing to let me help you is a huge step.” Briggs says, keeping his voice reassuring and gentle as he holds you a little closer, pressing a soft kiss on the top of your head.
“I can’t go to a rehab. That would raise too many questions with the Bureau and the others. So, are there any other options?” You ask quietly, eyes flicking around the room. At your words, Briggs nods with a slight hum in agreement.
“You’re not wrong. I have an idea but it won’t be pretty. It will require you to trust me fully. I know you’ve already said you trust me but I want to make sure I have one hundred percent of your trust.” Briggs says as you lift your head off his shoulder so you can look each other in the eye.
“You have one hundred percent of my trust, Briggs.” You promise, and your vulnerable expression makes it clear to Briggs that you trust him wholeheartedly.
“Okay, before we do anything. We’re going to make a quick run to the store, we’re going to be here for a few days so let’s stock up.” Briggs says, getting to his feet as you follow, slightly confused as to where Briggs was going with this. You follow Briggs wordlessly to the nearest store, watching as he piles various ready meals, snacks, and water into a basket before he heads over to the cashier to buy the food. After purchasing the drinks and the food, Briggs takes you back to the small apartment and lets you sit down on the bed once more while he unpacks the food and drinks.
“Briggs, what is this place?” You ask curiously, wondering why you had never learnt about this place sooner.
“It’s just a safe house. It’s only really been for emergencies if I need a place to lie low I come here. I’ve never told you guys about this place because if something happened and I was hiding out here I wouldn’t want to put that pressure to lie on you guys.” Briggs explains, briefly pausing his actions as he watches you, studying how you nodded shakily, exhaling strongly.
“That makes sense.” You mumble, jaw clenching as your gaze flicks to the floor.
“You feeling okay?” Briggs asks, having a feeling he was recognising the signs but not wanting to jump to conclusions just yet.
“Just feeling off, maybe slightly nauseous?” You say, looking back up at Briggs who watches you sympathetically.
“Okay. But that’s to be expected, right? This detox is going to be tough. You’re going to hate me, call me every name under the sun. You’re going to be in so much pain but I know you can do it. And I’ll be here with you the whole way through. Promise.” Briggs says, shoving the last of the shopping away before crossing to you, sitting down alongside you and smiling reassuringly.
“Can you walk me through how this detox is going to work?” You ask and Briggs could sense the nervousness and fear rolling off you in waves. One look at your nervous expression and Briggs wanted to abandon the whole thing and take you back to Graceland but he knew he had to persevere, for your benefit above everything else.
“It sounds like some kind of horror movie but the only thing I can really do here is strap you to the bed and let you ride out the wave. I know it sounds horrible but I know you’re much stronger than you look and that if you were desperate, which you most likely will be, you’ll overpower me and be gone in seconds if I give you the chance.” Briggs explains, getting up from the bed and crossing to one of the drawers nearby to grab a spare pair of handcuffs he had for emergencies. At Briggs’ words, you swallow nervously. You knew it was for your own good, it would help you get through the roughest part of overcoming your addiction and you were comforted by the thought that Briggs would be with you the whole time. You knew he’d look after you and help you no matter what happened.
“If that’s the best plan. Then I’ll do it.” You say, nodding slightly as you look up at Briggs who offers you a supportive smile as he reaches out to rest a hand on your shoulder, squeezing it lightly in reassurance.
“Alright, sounds like we gotta get this show on the road then, huh?” Briggs says in an attempt to somewhat lighten the mood. Finally, after some deep breaths, you give Briggs the nod he needs to confirm that you are ready and you lie back on the bed, waiting patiently as Briggs handcuffs you to the bed, making sure you’re comfortable before he straightens up.
“Do you think you could let the others know we’re okay?” You ask, after giving your right arm a few test tugs to make sure the restraint is tight enough to keep you in place.
“Of course, I’ll do that. I won’t tell them where we are or what we’re doing. Promise.” Briggs says as he places a bucket alongside the bed just in case you feel the need to throw up. You nod with a small smile, wiggling slightly to get more comfortable in the bed.
“Do you think…? Do you think you could let Tim know I’m okay? I feel bad enough that I went missing the first time and he had no idea if I was even alive or not. I owe it to him to let him know I’m okay this time around.” You ask quietly, watching as Briggs nods once more.
“Got it. I’ll let the others know and then I’ll let lover boy know in the morning, now get some sleep, you’re going to need it.” Briggs says with a wink as he pulls his phone out of his pocket, his gaze flicking down to the screen as he types out a message to send to Charlie.
“Come on Briggs.” You grumble, glaring over at Briggs who chuckles at how quickly he had managed to rile you up.
“Sorry. You know I had to. Now sleep.” Briggs says with a shrug, before pointing at you, his voice slightly stern as you grumble, attempting to find a comfortable position to lie in, feeling the nausea and nagging demand for more heroin screaming in your ear.
‘Hey, Tim, It’s Paul Briggs. I’ve taken y/n away for a couple of weeks just to help her decompress after whatever happened with her in Mexico and we’ve both decided she’d benefit from it. She’ll be unable to contact you for a while because of it. Everything is okay and you have no reason to worry.’
Tim’s eyebrows furrowed as he read the text that came through on his phone while he was sitting at a table ready for morning roll call, studying the message carefully as if he had somehow read it wrong. After reading the text a few times over, Tim sighs heavily as Lucy gives him a side-eye.
“What’s wrong?” Lucy asks curiously, turning her attention to Tim with a confused expression.
“That Briggs guy just messaged me saying that he’s taking y/n away for a bit to help her after all that stuff that happened in Mexico,” Tim mutters, eyes remaining fixed on the message as Lucy takes in his words.
“I mean, it would make sense for her to want to be away from everything. She’s clearly been through a lot recently and if she’s still not cleared to go back to work I understand why she’d want time away. It sounds like Briggs is just trying to help.” Lucy says with a slight shrug, trying to reassure Tim that it wasn’t anything personal.
“I get that. I’m just worried about her. She hasn’t been herself recently.” Tim says, expressing for the first time that he was concerned about you. He’d recognised a couple of signs with you that he had seen with Isabel and he was concerned that something had happened to you.
“I know you’re concerned, it goes to show how much you care about her. But this is probably what she needs. I needed time off after what happened with Caleb. Sometimes the best way to overcome stuff is just to get away from everything and it’s good that Briggs is evidently helping her through it.” Lucy says, her voice level and calm as Tim nods despite his slight frustration and jealousy.
“I know it’s just-”
“You’re jealous that Briggs is the one helping her not you?” Lucy cuts in with a raised eyebrow, trying to get to the bottom of what is really bothering Tim.
“Wha-? No, I’m not jealous.” Tim insists, eyes wide as he looks over at Lucy who doesn’t look convinced by his words.
“Okay, so let’s just go over this again. You’re bothered that y/n has gone away for a few weeks but you’re not concerned that she’s gone away with Briggs of all people?” Lucy asks, carefully studying Tim’s reaction.
“Briggs has nothing to do with my feelings regarding y/n being away.” Tim continues to insist, looking away from Lucy as he lets out a scoff.
“Are you sure? I won’t hold it against you if you are.” Lucy says, smiling lightly to try and ease the tension that has now settled between them.
“Okay I’m not jealous but after going to Mexico with that guy I just have a bad feeling about him. He seems like he’s only out for himself.” Tim then says, turning to face Lucy again whose eyebrows raised slightly in shock at Tim’s words.
“You think he’s going to hurt y/n or something?” She asks, concerned about what Tim thinks Briggs’ intentions are.
“I don’t know. y/n’s always spoken highly of him. Said he was her training officer when she first moved here and she’s trusted him for years now.” Tim explains, thinking of all the times you’d talked about Briggs. He knew you trusted Briggs with your life but after the interactions he had with him in Mexico. Tim couldn’t help but feel that something was off with Briggs. He didn’t like that Briggs had been so nonchalant when it came to finding you and how he had lorded the command he had over Tim’s head when Tim was the only one that first day who was chomping at the bit to go looking for you.
“I don’t think y/n would go with him if she didn’t trust him.” Lucy bargains, trying to calm Tim and reassure him that he’s just overthinking the whole thing.
“I know. I just-”
“Alright, guys, look alive!” The voice of Grey booms around the room as all conversations suddenly die down and everyone’s eyes flick to the front, ready to hear about what is on the agenda for the day. As Grey begins to talk, Lucy finds herself studying Tim in the corner of her eye, worried about him.
When Grey had finally finished talking and dismissed the group of gathered police officers, Tim got to his feet and headed to his shop to check the vehicle over with Lucy following close behind.
“Hey, I’ll get the war bags and then I’ll drive today, okay?” Lucy says, her voice gentle as she pats Tim’s shoulder lightly before turning back to head inside and get the war bags they need for their patrol. When she returned, she loaded the bags in the trunk of the vehicle and took the keys from Tim’s outstretched hand before climbing into the driver's seat while Tim rounded the shop and got in the passenger side.
The patrol was long and stressful for Tim. He tried to ask for updates every half an hour but all Briggs would ever send in response was ‘she’s fine.’ It started to grow frustrating when Tim received that message for what felt like the hundredth time and he fought the urge to throw his phone.
“Is he not telling you anything?” Lucy asks, her eyes fixed on the road as she hears Tim let out another sigh.
“He just keeps saying she’s fine. I can’t get any more than that. I just wish he’d tell me something, anything.” Tim grumbles, thumbs hovering over his phone screen as he debates sending a message back.
“At least you know she’s okay. That’s something, right?” Lucy offers, trying to put a positive spin on things while Tim continues to frown angrily, eyes not leaving his phone screen.
“But he’s not telling me any more than that. It sounds like a guy holding someone for ransom or something. He could just let me call and speak to her but he won’t let me.” Tim says, his jaw clenching.
“Tim. She’s been through something. We don’t know what but it’s probably been traumatic for her so I don’t blame her for wanting to go off the grid completely with someone she trusts to get through it.” Lucy says, reiterating the point she had made mere hours earlier. Lucy felt like she had been talking to a brick wall for most of the patrol. Thankfully, Tim could pull himself together enough to respond appropriately to calls, but the second he was back in the shop he was staring at his phone like a moping puppy.
By the end of the patrol, Lucy had tried everything she could to calm Tim down and convince him that he was overthinking but nothing seemed to work. It became increasingly clear to Lucy that the only way to get Tim to relax was for him to see for himself that you were okay. All she managed to achieve by the end of the patrol was for Tim to agree to wait for you to contact him first although she could tell it wouldn’t stop Tim’s worry.
“Hey, Tim. Take it easy, okay? I know y/n being off the grid right now is bothering you but you can’t let it interfere with your work.” Lucy says softly after bumping into Tim on her way out of the locker room.
“I know. I’ll do my best.” Tim mumbles with a small nod, adjusting his bag on his shoulder as he looks down at Lucy. He was already planning on going home, relaxing on the couch, and watching the game with Kojo to try to take his mind off everything.
“I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me if you need anything.” Lucy says, nodding at Tim before making her way out of the station so she can head home, leaving Tim in the corridor.
By the end of two weeks in the safe house with Briggs, you were more than ready to go back to Graceland and get back to normality. The whole detox process had been sent from hell itself. You had cursed Briggs out for days while you writhed in pain on the bed and then to make matters worse you started burning up with a fever afterwards. You were fairly sure that most of the food Briggs offered to you had ended up being emptied out of your stomach after a few short minutes. But the pain had been worth it. You had completely cleared the heroin out of your system. While it was still there, the nagging demand for the drug had lessened and you knew that with the support of Briggs, you’d be able to get back into work and get back into a somewhat normal life.
“Can we go home, Briggs? Please?” You ask quietly while in the middle of drying your hair with a towel after a long overdue shower.
“You think you’re ready?” Briggs asks after taking a sip from his cup of coffee. His tone lacked judgement, only filled with concern as he looked over at you.
“I’m ready. I’ve missed everyone so much. I just want to go home.” You say, tears filling your eyes at the mere thought of your family back in Graceland.
“Okay, we’ll get sorted and then head back to Graceland,” Briggs says, getting to his feet after finishing his drink and crossing to the sink to clean the mug.
“Thank you.” You whisper gratefully, your eyes still teary as you look over at Briggs who nods, eyes fixed on the mug he was cleaning.
“I’ll be keeping a close eye on you when we’re back home. If I catch even the slightest whiff of a relapse I will tell the Bureau for your own good. And I’ll have you coming to my Narcotics Anonymous meetings which I know probably sounds ridiculous but I promise you it helps.” Briggs then says, finally putting the mug down before turning to look at you, a look of seriousness on his face as his arms folded across his chest. You nod at his words knowing that Briggs would absolutely follow through on his threat if he deemed it necessary and you couldn’t blame him. Your battle with addiction could put yourself and so many others in danger if you relapsed. The idea of losing your job and the people you loved so much served to push you to better yourself, to not let the drug get the better of you again.
“You got it.” You say assuredly, a verbal promise that you’d adhere to any and all rules that Briggs may put in place for your own benefit.
“Cool. Right, let’s get going. I know Charlie is desperate to make her world-famous ragu but she’s been refusing to make it without you there. I’d be surprised if the house was still intact when we got home with how long it’s been since we’ve had sauce night.” Briggs admits with a chuckle, thinking about the various messages he had received from various members of the house.
“I feel like I need to buy some flowers or something to apologise for depriving everyone of sauce night for so long.” You laugh breathily as you stand from the bed, moving to grab your shoes as you discard the towel, hanging it over the back of the chair Briggs had placed by the bed, a way to sit nearby and support you through your detox.
“They’ll get over it. However, Tim was practically constantly pestering me for updates on how you were doing.” Briggs says, smoothly shifting the subject as you look over at him eyes wide with worry.
“You didn’t tell him what was going on, did you?” You ask, concern grabbing at your throat, constricting it as you fear what Tim may know.
“Of course, I didn’t. I only told him that you were okay and that we were away for some time to help you decompress after Mexico. I didn’t say anything more than that.” Briggs assures, grabbing his jacket from where it had been carelessly discarded on the table and tugging it on, waiting patiently for you to put your shoes on.
“Good. If he finds out, I want him to hear it from me directly.” You say, looking up at Briggs, briefly distracted from tying your shoelaces. Briggs watches you quietly, and a small sigh escapes his lips.
“Look, y/n. Telling Tim might not be the best idea. Secrets have burdens and telling someone, like Tim, who’s a member of the LAPD would really throw a stick in the works. I mean at the end of the day it’s up to you who you tell. But think about how it could affect them as well.” Briggs says, making your eyebrows furrow in thought as you think carefully about his words. You owed it to Tim to be honest with him, especially after everything that had happened recently, but you knew there was a possibility that he would react badly to the revelation. He was a Sergeant within the LAPD and you didn’t want him to have to go to work with that knowledge in his head. Briggs’ words also then made you realise that there was virtually no reason for you to even try and pursue a relationship with Tim anymore. Being an undercover agent was hard enough for relationships, let alone throwing in the fact that you were now a recovering heroin addict.
“You’re right.” You mumble softly, your mood now significantly dampened as you finish tying your laces, standing up and waiting for Briggs to join you.
“Let’s head home,” Briggs says softly, wrapping a supportive arm around your shoulders in an attempt to cheer you up after noticing how his previous words had affected you. You nod wordlessly in response and allow Briggs to lead you out of the safe house so you can both finally make your way back to Graceland.
The walk back to Graceland was quiet. Briggs had opted to take the scenic route home, walking along the beach. You admired the sights you had missed so much and watched the surfers who were in the ocean, patiently waiting for the next big wave. You couldn’t wait to return to the ocean, surf and forget all your worries. As you continue to walk along the beachfront, you hear a bark and perk up, noticing the familiar dog bounding towards you.
“Hey, BD!” You greet the dog excitedly as he presses himself up against your legs, eager for attention from you.
“It’s been a while, huh, buddy?” Briggs says lightly, reaching down to pet the dog as well. BD, short for Beach Dog had been living as a stray and roaming the beach since before you had joined Graceland. He was happy living on the beach and you and the others respected that. Of course, you’d bring him food and water on occasion, and pet him whenever you saw him, but you never tried to force him away from the comfort he had found from living on the beach.
“You haven’t been stealing any more of Mike’s flip-flops have you?” You ask the dog teasingly, stroking the top of his head softly as he pants happily, head tilting slightly as if he understood what you were saying to him.
“You’re just keeping Mikey on his toes aren’t you?” Briggs says down to BD, laughing as the dog lays down, rolling onto his back for even more attention. After a couple more minutes of fussing over the dog you had missed so much, you eventually decided to continue the walk back to Graceland with BD trotting alongside by your legs before he became distracted by something going on further down the beach and bolted off to investigate what was happening on his turf.
“Glad we were interesting enough for about five minutes.” You laugh breathily as you watch BD booking it down the beach, barking as he goes.
“I mean if I were a dog I’d probably find seagulls more interesting too,” Briggs says, bumping you lightly with his shoulder as you watch the seagulls that had been wandering the beach in BD’s line of sight take to the sky in a flurry as he rushes towards them.
“Yeah, I can’t blame him for that. He’s got to protect his beach.” You say with a smile as you watch BD bark at the birds that are now in the sky, squawking in warning to others.
You continue to walk down the beach until you finally approach the door to Graceland. You take a moment to stand outside the door, processing the fact that you are finally home after everything that has happened to you recently. You could only hope that this time you were here to stay. As if sensing your hesitation, Briggs gently hands you a key to the house, his smile supportive as he nods in approval. You nod back before lifting your hand to the door, carefully putting the key into the lock, taking a deep breath before turning the key and opening the door.
“Welcome home!” Your eyes widened and your jaw dropped when you saw your housemates standing in the living room, wide smiles on their faces as they stood in front of a ‘welcome home’ banner.
“How did you-?”
“Briggs told us you were coming home today. We hauled ass to get this together.” Johnny brags, crossing to you and pulling you into his arms with a grin. You were unsurprised to discover that Johnny was the brains behind the operation. He never turned down an opportunity to plan a party, no matter how small.
“You didn’t have to.” You say, your eyes growing teary with appreciation as you pull away from Johnny’s embrace slightly, looking over his shoulder to where the others are now approaching.
“We wanted to, y/n/n. You’re family.” Mike says, pulling you into a hug of his own as you mirror his actions, hugging him tight.
“I was only gone for a couple of weeks.” You insist, trying to fathom why they had gone out of their way to do such a thing for you.
“Yeah and after what you’d been through it’s the least we could do. Briggs didn’t give me enough of a heads up so unfortunately we can’t have sauce night tonight but three days from now we’ll have it, alright?” Charlie says, her voice soft and motherly as Mike lets you move to hug her, her hand instantly coming up to run through your hair as she hugs you.
“I’ve gone this long without it. What’s a few more days?” You joke lightly, eliciting laughs from the other members of the house.
“All that matters is that you’re okay,” Paige says, smiling softly as you look over at her, your smile matching hers as you detangle yourself from Charlie’s embrace to hug Paige who wraps you up in her arms quickly, hugging you close as you reciprocate the action.
“Jakes, are you not getting involved?” You ask, noticing how Jakes had elected to stay a few paces behind everyone else, watching the interactions from a short distance.
“Well you know parties aren’t my thing,” Jakes says with a light shrug as you are released from Paige’s embrace, an eyebrow raised as you watch him carefully.
“Not even a welcome home party for me?” You ask teasingly, opening your arms for a hug as Jakes chuckles lightly.
“Who am I kidding? Come here, girl.” Jakes says, crossing to you with a smile, wrapping you up in his arms, hugging you tightly as you laugh.
“Are you staying now?” You hear Mike ask, turning your head to look over at him with a small smile.
“Yes, Mikey, you’re all stuck with me once more. I’m going to head to the Bureau in a couple of days and see if I can get back out there working again.” You say, glancing around at each person in turn, offering them all soft smiles.
“You’re sure you’re feeling up to working again?” Charlie asks, her worry evident on her face and in her voice as she talks.
“I’m definitely feeling up to it. Being out of action for so long is sending me insane and I just feel useless sitting around doing nothing while you guys are still working.” You explain as Jakes loosens his grip on you, allowing you to step away and fully address everyone around you.
“Damn, was the two weeks with me that bad?” Briggs jokes, slinging an arm around your shoulders and jostling you slightly as everyone laughs.
“Yeah, what was it you were up to with Briggs?” Johnny asks curiously, eyebrow raised as his eyes flick between you and Briggs.
“I just needed time away from everything and Briggs was teaching me all his zen techniques to help after what happened in Mexico.” You laugh, the lie coming easily as the others laugh at the idea of you meditating with Briggs for two weeks straight.
“Well you’re home now, and we’ve got your back. We’re going to help you as much as we can.” Mike says, his smile gentle as ever as the rest of the group nods in support, making your heart swell with appreciation for the support you were getting from the others. They didn’t know the truth behind why you had disappeared but you weren’t ready to tell them about it, especially after Briggs’ warning. After a few minutes of catching up with the others, you head up to your room to put your things away and as you dig through the bag, discarding used clothes into the laundry basket, you find your burner phone at the bottom of the bag. The phone had been the one you used to contact the local drug dealers you knew, the ones you knew could get you heroin when you needed it. You hold the phone in your hands, staring down at the phone as it seemingly taunts you, a siren song to just turn the phone on and call someone to get the high you had been deprived of for weeks. After staring at the phone for what felt like hours, you snap yourself back to reality, standing from where you had sat on the edge of your bed and make your way to Briggs’ room, knocking on the door and waiting for permission to come in.
“What can I do for you?” Briggs asks with a smile after calling you in from where he was sitting on his bed, his laptop on his legs as he scrolls through files he’s not looked at for weeks as you close the door behind you.
“I need you to take this.” You say, practically forcing the phone in Briggs’ hand the moment you cross the room and reach his side, noticing his confused expression at the force behind your actions and your words.
“I’m sorry, why?” Briggs questions, discarding his laptop alongside him on the bed as he pushes himself more upright.
“I used that phone to contact people when I wanted a hit. I don’t trust myself at the moment to go around knowing that it was in my room. You can do whatever you want with it. Destroy it. Hide it. Bury it in a ditch for all I care as long as I don’t know where it is.” You say, not even able to bring yourself to look at the phone as you begin to pace anxiously. At your panic, Briggs gets up from where he is sitting, placing his hands on your shoulder, catching you in your pacing and ducking his head down to be in your line of sight.
“y/n/n. Breathe. I got you. You’re so much stronger than you think and the fact you’ve taken the initiative to bring this to me so you’re not tempted is a huge step and shows how seriously you’re taking your recovery and it gives me faith that you’re not going to relapse easily. I’ve got it handled. This phone is going to disappear off the map and you’ll never have to think about it again.” Briggs says softly, squeezing your shoulders ever so slightly to alleviate the tension he felt sitting there. He watched carefully as you nodded, exhaling softly before getting the courage to finally look Briggs in the eye.
“Thank you, Briggs.” You mumble appreciatively, the smallest of smiles gracing your face as Briggs nods, a smile of his own appearing.
“We have a meeting in a couple of days, it’ll feel scary and intimidating but I’ll be there too. And if the Bureau clears you for work I’m making sure you start off easy. I’m not letting anyone throw you in the deep end if I’m not there, okay? We’re going to figure it out.” Briggs assures you softly, his words giving you confidence that you’ll be able to get back to normality in time.
“Thank you.” You repeat, nodding as Briggs releases his grip on your shoulders, standing up straight and tucking the phone securely in his pocket.
“You don’t need to worry about that phone anymore. It’ll be gone before the day is up.” Briggs says with a quick wink, making you nod, grateful for the support Briggs was showing you when you knew he had no obligation to do so. With one final ‘thank you’ muttered, you turn on your heel and head out of the room, making your way back to your own room to grab a hoodie before heading downstairs to join the others who greet you with smiles.
“What are we watching?” You say, settling down on the couch alongside Mike who turns to look at you with a smile.
“Some western. Bello is obsessed with them so I’ve got to make sure my knowledge about them is top-notch.” Mike says as he settles back against the cushions, a slight sigh escaping his lips.
“And he’s recorded over all the shit I’ve recorded,” Johnny complains, entering the living room and dropping down on the couch next to you with a groan.
“I said they’ll be gone soon Johnny, stop complaining.” Mike fires back with a laugh as Johnny rolls his eyes.
“How’s it going with Bello, anyway?” You ask curiously, looking over at Mike.
“It’s going. He’s thinking about starting a deal with Odin. He’s hesitant because he knows going against the Caza Cartel can have pretty bad consequences.” Mike admits as you nod, unbeknownst to him that you had experienced the brutality of the Caza Cartel firsthand and could understand why someone like Bello was hesitant to move to another dealer.
“I can understand why he’s hesitant. From what I’ve heard, Caza can be brutal when they want to be.” You say, acting as nonchalantly as possible to avoid Mike and Johnny figuring out that you had a run-in with Caza, although you were fairly sure they had their suspicions after seeing the condition you were in when you had returned from Mexico.
“So, are you going to let Tim know you’re back? Honestly, I’d be surprised if he didn’t confess his feelings the moment he sees you.” Johnny says with a laugh, attempting to change the subject as Mike chuckles quietly, neither man noticing the dejected expression appearing on your face.
“I don’t know when I’ll see him. But we’re not going to start a relationship. He doesn’t like me like that. And even if he did, I couldn’t do that to him.” You say, eyes flicking to the floor as your knee begins to bounce anxiously.
“Do what to who?” Charlie asks as she enters the living room, having clearly heard the tail end of your words but not knowing the full context.
“She’s saying she couldn’t date Tim,” Johnny says, immediately ratting you out and ignoring your half-hearted glare as Charlie settles down alongside him on the couch.
“Why do you say that? He’s head over heels for you.” Charlie asks, her voice soft as she watches you carefully, not missing the tears welling in your eyes.
“Yeah! He’s so in love with you and we can all tell you love him too. Come on girl you need to go for it! Put us all out of our misery here.” Johnny teases, making you grit your teeth as the tears continue to build.
“I’m an undercover agent. I can’t in good conscience date him when I work such a dangerous job. He deserves better.” You say, the tears slipping past their defences and trickling down your cheeks as you squeeze your eyes shut, hands clutching the edge of the couch like it was a lifeline.
“Baby, you’ll never know unless you try. He’s LAPD, he understands our job more than most would. I’m sure the two of you could navigate a relationship.” Charlie insists softly, standing up so she can swap seats with Johnny, wrapping an arm around you and tugging you into her side the moment she sits down alongside you.
“I can’t put him through that. He deserves better than to be worrying about me when I’m undercover. And I won’t put a target on his back just for the sake of a relationship.” You say firmly, suddenly standing and making a beeline for the front door, wanting to get away from the questioning. You ignored the calls from the others as they tried to get you to stay but you feared that you’d snap if you endured any more of their pressing. You headed down to the beach, heading down to the nearest pier and sitting underneath it in the shade. It was hidden and peaceful so you’d at least have a small slither of time to yourself before someone tracked you down.
Your feelings for Tim were overwhelmingly strong. You truly cared for him and wished you could be in a relationship with him but you knew you couldn’t. You were close enough with Tim to have learnt about his ex-wife Isabel and her drug addiction. You also knew how badly it had affected Tim as well. With what Jangles and the Caza Cartel did to you, you knew it would ruin Tim to try and be in a relationship with you and you weren’t willing to put him through that pain again. You couldn’t bear to potentially get into a relationship with him and then relapse, putting Tim through the pain of you giving in to your past addiction.
The longer you think about what Caza has taken from you, your emotions begin to get the better of you, tears flowing freely down your cheeks as you mourn a relationship you never had in the first place. You longed to be able to tell Tim how you felt but you knew the risks associated with your job would put him in danger and you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if something happened to him because of you. As you continue to cry, you pull your knees up to your chest, burying your face in your knees to try and stifle your sobs as they rack your body.
“y/n!” You’re vaguely aware of Johnny’s voice calling out to you, followed by rushed footsteps as he approaches but you couldn’t bring yourself to speak or even look at him. You hear Johnny sit down alongside you yet you still don’t look up at him.
“Hey, y/n/n. I’m sorry for the jokes. It was stupid of me to do that.” Johnny apologises quietly his gaze fixed on the ocean ahead of him. Johnny felt so guilty for joking about your feelings for Tim the moment you bolted out of the house, he felt like he deserved the slap on the back of the head he received from Charlie after everyone had processed what happened.
“It wasn’t you John.” Your hoarse voice speaks up as you finally lift your head from your knees, turning your head so you can look at Johnny who turns to face you with a sad look, guilt written clear as day across his face.
“You don’t need to lie to me, y/n. I know I upset you.” Johnny says, a weak attempt at a smile creeping onto his face as he watches you carefully. You fought back the temptation to frown. Johnny was the brightest light within Graceland, he was always smiling and finding the fun in everything around him despite the job he was a part of and he had become like a younger brother to you during your time in Graceland. You hated to see him so upset over something that wasn’t his fault. You knew he was just trying to make light of the situation and you let your emotions get the better of you.
“Johnny, I promise I’m not upset with you. It’s just been a rough few weeks and I took it out on you. That wasn’t fair of me to do.” You say apologetically, lifting your hand to wipe at your tears. Johnny then takes the opportunity to shuffle closer, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and tugging you gently against his side, smiling softly as you rest your head on his shoulder.
“I promise I won’t make any more jokes about you and Tim. I’ll be on my best behaviour,” Johnny says softly, making you smile as a small laugh escapes your lips.
“I don’t mind jokes, Johnny. But less jokes about Tim would be appreciated.” You admit quietly as Johnny nods before resting his head atop yours.
“You got it. One hundred percent serious Johnny is here to stay.” Johnny brags lightly, making you laugh once more.
“I give you a day before you start cracking jokes again.” You mutter softly, a smile on your face as Johnny gasps lightly.
“You wanna bet?” Johnny asks with a raised eyebrow.
“Okay, if you make even one joke towards me before tomorrow is up, you have to buy my drinks next time we go to the bar. If you make it through tomorrow, I’ll buy your drinks.” You propose, lifting your head from Johnny’s shoulder and holding a hand out towards him.
“You’ve got yourself a deal. I can’t wait to have a night of free drinks.” Johnny brags as he lets go of your hand, both of you laughing softly as Johnny pulls you into a quick hug. Before the two of you can go back to conversing, you hear the sound of two people running, before they stop suddenly alongside you.
“y/n?” At the sound of your name, you pull away from Johnny’s embrace and look over your shoulder and see Tim and Lucy standing alongside you.
“Tim.” You say quietly, both you and Johnny scrambling to get to your feet.
“I didn’t know you were back,” Tim says, trying to keep his voice steady and neutral while his brain was running at one hundred miles per hour.
“I just got back today.” You say with a small shrug, trying to downplay your absence.
“Oh, right,” Tim mutters, a weak attempt at a smile on his face as he regards you softly.
“What brings you guys here? Tim hates the beach so it’s definitely a surprise seeing you guys here.” You then say, changing the subject and looking over at Lucy.
“We’re working a case and we found a piece of potential evidence. Then a dog grabbed it right out of Tim’s hand and ran off with it.” Lucy explains, her hands resting on her belt as she talks.
“I bet it was BD. What do you think, Johnny?” You say, glancing over at Johnny who nods in agreement.
“Sorry? BD?” Tim asks, eyes flicking between you and Johnny in hopes of an answer.
“Beach Dog. We call him BD for short. He’s known around here for snatching stuff and running off with it. We’ll help you track him down.” You explain before beginning to survey the beach, eyes squinting as you hope to locate the dog in question.
“We should split up. I’ll go with you y/n, and then you two can go around together.” You hear Johnny suggest, looking back at the group, ready to nod before Lucy speaks up.
“I’d actually like to go around with you if you don’t mind, Johnny. I have questions about the FBI and I’d love to learn more.” Lucy asks quickly, looking over at Johnny who in turn looks at you, quietly asking for permission. When you nod lightly, Johnny then turns to face Lucy with a wide smile.
“It would be my pleasure.” He says with a grin as he and Lucy head down the beach in one direction while you and Tim head in the other, both of you surveying the beach in hopes of spotting BD or the piece of potential evidence.
“So, what is it we’re looking for?” You ask quietly, realising as you walk that you have no idea what it is you’re looking for.
“It’s a scrap of a t-shirt. Chances are it could just be a random scrap of cloth but with this being one of the last known locations of our missing person it would be stupid not to consider it evidence until proven otherwise.” Tim says, following you down the beach.
“And BD’s just gone and stolen it from you. He’s the sweetest dog but he really will just steal anything. Stole one of Mike’s flip-flops his first full day here.” You mutter, slightly agitated at the dog for potentially hindering a serious case.
“Is he a stray?” Tim asks curiously as you stop walking for a moment to look around you, allowing Tim to catch up to you.
“Yeah, and he likes it that way. He prefers living out here.” You explain as Tim nods in understanding.
“I see. Well if he’s happy out here that’s all that matters.” Tim shrugs lightly.
“Exactly.” You mutter before noticing some tracks that look like they could belong to BD, beginning to follow them as Tim rushes to catch up to you.
“How have you been? You were gone for a while and Briggs wouldn’t give me much of a response when I asked.” Tim asks, watching you carefully as you feel your heart twinge.
“I’m fine. I needed the time away from everything and Briggs was the guy who could help me most.” You respond as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. In reality, you longed to tell Tim the truth but you longed to protect him so you attempted to close yourself off, acting cold and distant to try and drive him away.
“And did the time away help?” Tim asks softly, wanting to know if you are okay or not.
“I guess.” You shrug, trying to be as vague as possible to deter Tim from continuing to question you about your time away from everyone. Getting the hint that you don’t want to talk more, Tim falls silent and continues to follow you down the beach until you find BD lying in the sand, a scrap of cloth in his mouth as he studies you carefully, ears perked.
“Hey, buddy. We need that. Is it okay if I have it?” You asks the dog softly, beginning to crouch down to his level but you quickly realise that BD was going to see this as a game as he gets to his feet, his eyes never leaving you.
“I’ve got something you might like a little better. How does a treat sound?” Tim asks the dog, digging in one of his pockets for a small pack of dog treats, extracting a treat from the packet and offering it towards BD who drops the scrap of cloth, allowing you to scoop it up while Tim gives BD a treat who accepts it happily, allowing Tim to pet him briefly before bolting off down the beach, now uninterested in the two of you.
“You just carry dog treats around like that?” You muse with a small smile, raising an eyebrow as Tim shrugs lightly.
“I went into a store earlier to ask some questions and I saw these treats. I thought my dog would like them.” Tim says with a small smile, tucking the treat packet back into his pocket as he talks.
“You never mentioned having a dog.” You say, shocked that you hadn’t known that information about Tim.
“Yeah I have a dog, his name is Kojo,” Tim says as the two of you begin to make your way back towards where you had split up with Johnny and Lucy.
“Can’t believe you kept that information from me.” You tease, laughing softly.
“You’ll have to meet him sometime.” Tim then says, his voice softening as he glances over at you. He longed to spend more time with you outside of your jobs but he never wanted to push your boundaries.
“Maybe. We’ll see.” You reply, suddenly sobering up when you remember the rules you had set in place to protect yourself and Tim. Sensing that the conversation was ending, Tim radioed Lucy, letting her know that you had found the missing item. As you approach the meeting point, you see Lucy and Johnny chatting as they wait for you to arrive.
“Chen, we’ve got it,” Tim calls over to her, making both Lucy and Johnny approach the two of you as you dig the item out of your pocket holding it out towards Lucy.
“I don’t know how good this would be as evidence. It’s got dog slobber all over it.” You say apologetically as Lucy takes it from your hand.
“Forensics are good at their job. They should be able to find something of use here. Hopefully.” Lucy says, tucking the scrap of cloth away in a zip-loc bag.
“Forensics can find anything. If this evidence is useful, it won’t take them long to find something.” Johnny says confidently, lightly bumping Lucy with his shoulder and chuckling.
“Johnny’s right. You guys should get that to forensics so you can find out if it’ll help your case or not.” You say, looking from Tim to Lucy and back again as they nod in agreement.
“That’s true. Come on Lucy, let’s go and see if this was worth chasing a dog down for.” Tim mutters, nodding over at Lucy who mirrors his action.
“We’ll see you around,” Lucy says to you and Johnny before turning to leave with Tim, both of them heading back in the direction they had come from. You and Johnny watch them leave quietly before looking over at each other.
“We should probably head home before Charlie freaks out, huh?” You say quietly as Johnny nods.
“Yeah, I don’t feel like being murdered so the sooner we get back the better,” Johnny replies, gesturing for you to follow him and the two of you begin to head back to Graceland to spend the rest of the day relaxing.
A month later, you had gotten back into a regular routine. You weren’t ready to tackle undercover cases yet, so you had elected to work as a liaison between the FBI and the LAPD, offering support with tact teams and advice for any officers tackling any undercover cases. You had been regularly attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings with Briggs and with the support of him and the other meeting attendants, you had managed to earn yourself your one-month sobriety chip. You were so proud of yourself for getting this far. Some of your days were rougher than others, you’d be in a foul attitude and you’d snap at anyone who dared talk to you but on other days you were fine. Your good days were beginning to outnumber the bad ones and you were beginning to feel more and more like your old self. Your only issue was that you were still hiding what happened to you from everyone. You felt like the others in the house deserved to know about your struggles. Briggs might be okay hiding his struggles with addiction from the others but you felt like you were living a lie every time you looked one of them in the eye. You even felt like you owed it to Tim to be honest with him too. You had been spending more time at Mid-Wilshire and it was getting harder and harder to lie to him and pretend like everything was okay. You were willing to take the risk to tell him even if it meant he stopped talking to you altogether.
Tim had noticed your distant behaviour and had attempted to talk to you several times as well as trying to invite you to spend time out of work. Each time you had turned him down, telling him that you had planned things with the others or whatever excuse came to mind. Despite what Tim had been saying previously, Tim had found himself incredibly jealous of your closeness to Briggs. He regularly dropped you off and picked you up from Mid-Wilshire and Tim never missed the tight hugs and the gentle kisses Briggs would place upon the top of your head. He had no idea what had happened to prompt such a sudden bond between the two of you but it hurt to think that it could potentially be more than platonic between the two of you. After a month of you avoiding him and barely speaking more than a few words to him, Tim’s jealousy started to get the better of him and one evening after you left with Briggs, Tim decided to follow you.
It was easy to spot the orange Bronco even in nighttime LA traffic so Tim was able to follow from a reasonable distance so he could avoid being spotted. The drive was about twenty minutes long and Tim soon found himself parked outside a building and heading in. He had no idea where in the building you had gone but he could hear movement on the next floor so he carefully made his way up the stairs and headed towards the room with an open door, hearing a conversation begin to die down and just as he reached the door he saw you stood at the front of the room before a small crowd of people. Just as you prepared to speak, you looked up and locked eyes with Tim who had paused in the doorway, watching you softly. It took you by surprise at first, and all you could do was stare, shocked that he was there. Pulling yourself together, you took a deep breath, squeezing your eyes shut as you inhaled before finally getting the courage to open your eyes, watching Tim once more as you began to talk.
“Hi, my name is y/n and I’m a heroin addict.” You said, the same way you had weekly since Briggs started making you attend these meetings. You watched Tim’s reaction carefully and did your best to conceal your building tears when he continued to watch you, the shock evident in his eyes. You continue to talk, opening up about how you’d struggled a little since the last meeting but taking a moment to be proud of your achievement now that you had reached one month of sobriety. When you had finished talking, there was a small ripple of applause from everyone seated in front of you, including Tim from his spot in the doorway as you sat back down alongside Briggs. Tim decides to step out into the hallway as the rest of the meeting continues, waiting patiently for you to come out when the meeting is over.
When people began to file out of the room, Tim headed towards the door, seeing you and Briggs talking to another member of the meeting and you looked over at him, nodding in acknowledgement before excusing yourself from the conversation and making your way over to Tim.
“Hi.” You mumble quietly, the atmosphere awkward between the two of you as you stand before him, eyes looking everywhere but at him.
“Hey. Can we go somewhere more private?” Tim asks quietly, and you nod lightly.
“Is everything okay here?” Briggs asks, sidling up alongside you and watching Tim carefully as if he were a threat.
“Everything’s fine, Briggs. I’m going to chat with Tim privately. I’ll find you when I’m ready to head home.” You explain, turning to look at Briggs who nods, unconvinced.
“Okay. I’ll see you in a few.” Briggs says, embracing you quickly and kissing the top of your head in support before releasing you, allowing you to head out of the building with Tim, finding somewhere quiet to chat. You find a bench overlooking the ocean, both you and Tim sitting down on it and watching the waves quietly for a moment before Tim speaks up.
“Did that happen to you in Mexico?” He asks quietly, his gaze fixed on the dark waves lapping against the sand.
“Yeah… Caza clearly knew who I was. They knew if news of my addiction got out, all my cases would be reopened and investigated. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” You explain, tears welling in your eyes as you apologise.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Tim asks softly, finally turning his head to look at you, sadness written across all his features.
“I wanted to. But I remembered what you told me about Isabel. I couldn’t put you through that pain again. You don’t deserve it.” You say quietly, watching as Tim shakes his head.
“You didn’t need to do that. I would’ve wanted to support you in your recovery. I still do.” Tim insists, his eyes growing watery before he blinks furiously to rid himself of the tears.
“I’m sorry.” You whisper, tears spilling down your cheeks and Tim wasted no time in pulling you into his arms, holding you carefully as if you’d fall apart in his arms if he wasn’t careful.
“You don’t need to apologise. I’m sorry for following you all the way here. I wasn’t thinking straight and I let my emotions get the better of me.” Tim apologises, continuing to blink his own tears away as he holds you.
“I should’ve just told you sooner. That’s on me.” You say, sniffling as you cling to Tim.
“Don’t blame yourself. You went through something I could never fathom. And I won’t press you for anything more if you’re not ready to.” Tim says as you begin to pull away slightly so you can look him in the eyes.
“It was so much and I didn’t know what to do. It was weeks after I got back that I finally asked for help.” You admit tearily, lifting a hand to wipe at your eyes.
“And that was so brave of you to do. It took Isabel over a year to accept any help and I offered any time I could to help. The fact you’ve gotten help this soon and worked on it is incredible.” Tim says, his smile gentle as he talks, encouraging you to give him a small, weak smile in response.
“Briggs has been a massive help through it all. I wouldn’t have gotten through this without him.” You admit, thinking of your friend and how much he had been willing to help you.
“Is that what’s been going on with you two? You’re not… together?” Tim asks, aware that he might be pushing but his curiosity and jealousy were gnawing at his stomach and he didn’t have time to process what he was saying before it left his lips.
“Definitely not. Briggs is like an older brother to me. He figured out what was going on with me and like I said, he’s been my support system through all this.” You explain, waving your hand dismissively as Tim’s eyes fall to the floor, a slight blush covering his cheeks in his embarrassment.
“Sorry, that was completely unnecessary of me to ask and it wasn’t the place or time,” Tim says, rambling to try and recover from what he had just said.
“I don’t mind. I can understand why it might look like we are together.” You say with a soft smile, shrugging lightly to let Tim know you didn’t hold any bad blood about his question. The two of you then fell into a comfortable silence, but you could tell there was something Tim wanted to say so you waited patiently for him to get his confidence, wondering what it was he wanted to say to you.
“Hey, this is probably the worst possible time to say this but I owe it to you to be honest. I got jealous seeing how close you and Briggs were recently. It reminded me of what I was missing after you got back from Mexico because we used to be close. Maybe my feelings for you were just fuelling my jealousy I don’t know.” Tim explains awkwardly, fumbling to find the right words as he looks everywhere but at you.
“Feelings for me?” You ask quietly, shocked that Tim had admitted such a thing when you’d gone so long assuming that he didn’t see you in a romantic light.
“Uh, yeah. I have feelings for you. And have done for quite a while now.” Tim admits quietly, finally finding the courage to focus on you once more.
“Well, I guess I can’t lie to you anymore. I have feelings for you too. But I don’t want to hurt you.” You say softly, wanting to be completely transparent with Tim.
“Why do you think you’d hurt me?” Tim asks, tilting his head slightly in his confusion as you bite your lip, trying to fight back tears at the mere thought of hurting Tim somehow.
“What if I relapse? I don’t want to remind you of what you went through with Isabel. On top of that, my job is dangerous and I don’t want you to get hurt because of me.” You explain your fears as Tim softens.
“If you relapse, I’ll be there to help you every step of the way. I promise. On top of that, yes, your job may be dangerous but it’s not like I have no idea what your job entails. Isabel used to work undercover so I know what can happen. I can protect myself. Neither of those reasons is enough to scare me off. If you want to, I’d like to try a relationship. We can go at your pace.” Tim says, his voice gentle but his words confident and strong. He wanted you to know that if you were all in, he was too. He wouldn’t let himself be scared off easily.
“Are you sure?” You ask quietly, longing to just accept Tim’s offer but your mind was getting the better of you, making you overthink.
“I’m positive. But it’s up to you.” Tim confirms, making sure you know where he stands.
“I’d like to try a relationship too.” You reply shyly, both of you smiling lightly at each other before Tim embraces you once more, neither one of you wanting to break the embrace until you hear the sound of someone clearing their throat behind you, making you pull away and look behind you, seeing Briggs stood behind you with his arms crossed.
“Are you ready to go?” Briggs asks with a quirked eyebrow, clearly noticing the shift in energy between you and Tim.
“I probably should head home. I think I’m ready to tell everyone else about what happened. They deserve to know.” You say over to Briggs, fighting back a frown when he lets out a disappointed sigh.
“y/n, I don’t know if you should tell them. You’ve already burdened a member of the LAPD with this secret. If you tell the others they’ll be forced to carry it too.” Briggs says, making Tim clench his jaw before he stands up from the bench. He crosses to Briggs as you leap up to follow him, not wanting to witness a potential punching match.
“Hey, you have no right to tell y/n who she can and can’t tell. I am not burdened with her secret. She’s trusting me with it and I’ll keep it like my life depends on it. If she trusts everyone else in the house why shouldn’t they know?” Tim states angrily, stopping his approach towards Briggs when you place a hand on his chest.
“Fine. She can do what she wants, but this isn’t the first time I’ve warned her.” Briggs says after a brief staring contest between the two men before gesturing for you to follow him so he can take you back to Graceland.
“I’ll bring her back.” Tim volunteers, sticking close to you.
“Okay then. I’m going to head back, the others are probably having a campfire so you can join us whenever you are ready.” Briggs says, his voice losing its harshness as he directs his words to you but you already know how much he disapproved of your wishes. After he walks off, climbing into his Bronco and driving off, Tim turns to you.
“Are you okay? He was really harsh.” Tim asks, his eyes studying you worriedly as you nod.
“I’m fine. That’s just Briggs. He wants to do what he can to protect Graceland and everyone in it.” You dismiss with a shrug, following Tim to his truck, getting in the passenger seat when the vehicle has been unlocked.
“He didn’t need to make it seem like your battle with addiction is a burden,” Tim mutters as he starts the engine, pulling out of the parking spot and beginning the drive to Graceland.
“He’s not entirely wrong. Secrets have burdens. I know telling people can be bad, to give them such a big secret for them to protect is a lot to ask.” You say, your eyes fixed on the window beside you, watching the streetlights zip past, creating a blur of light.
“Still, if they’re close friends, it makes sense for them to know.” Tim justifies, his eyes fixed on the road.
“We’ve always had a saying that there’s no secrets at Graceland… unless you’re Briggs. They deserve to know. I haven’t told them a thing about what happened in Mexico since I got back.” You say, feeling guilt tugging on your heartstrings for all the lies you’d told your friends.
“If you want, I can be there with you as moral support,” Tim says, taking a brief moment to glance at you before focusing on the road again.
“You’d do that?” You ask, a slight shock in your voice as you look over at Tim who nods.
“Of course, I would. I can’t imagine this is the easiest thing to talk about and you’re about to talk about it for the second time in one night. If you want me there, I’m there.” Tim says as if it were the most obvious answer in the world, making a small smile appear on your face at his willingness to support you.
“I’d like that.” You say, watching how a small smile tugs at the corner of Tim’s lips as he continues to drive.
When you arrive at Graceland, you notice your friends sitting around a campfire on the beach and you tell Tim to follow you, both of you making your way down to the beach where everyone greeted you and Tim enthusiastically.
“What can we do for you two?” Charlie asks as Tim sidles up alongside you.
“I needed to talk to you guys about something. I haven’t been completely honest with you all since I got back from Mexico.” You say, taking a shuddering breath as all eyes fall on you and as if it was instinctual, Tim reaches out and takes your hand in his, squeezing softly to show his silent support.
Listening to you explain what happened to you in Mexico made Tim’s heart hurt. He hated having to listen to the pain you had been through and how long you had tried to deal with it alone before Briggs realised what was going on. Tim wasn’t too keen on Briggs, but he’d always be grateful that he noticed what was going on with you and helped you through everything. By the time you had finished explaining everything, tears had flowed down your face and stained your cheeks. At first, no one said anything, and as you readied yourself to apologise and talk about moving out, everyone got up from their place around the fire and rushed over to you, trapping you in a group hug as Tim relinquished his hold on your hand and stepped back to let your friends support you.
“Thank you for telling us,” Charlie says softly, wiping at your cheeks with her thumbs to get rid of the fallen tears.
“Your secret is safe with us, girl.” Johnny then says, followed by murmurs of agreement from the other members of the group. Feeling comforted by the support of the others, you thank them all quietly as they pull away allowing Tim to step back towards you, wrapping an arm around your middle and pulling you close, a gesture that doesn’t go unnoticed by the others. You spend a few minutes talking with your friends, telling them how your recovery has been going. They seemed to respect that it wasn’t the time to enquire about Tim and what your relationship may be with him at the current moment. After chatting for a while, a yawn slips past your lips.
“I might have to call it a night, guys.” You say apologetically, bidding everyone goodnight as Tim escorts you to the back door of Graceland.
“Will I see you tomorrow?” Tim asks quietly, taking your hand as he stands facing you.
“I’m not sure where I’ll be at work tomorrow, but if you want to see me after work I’m sure we can figure something out.” You reply with a smile, squeezing Tim’s hand as he smiles softly.
“Well, I do need to take you on our first official date,” Tim says with a raised eyebrow, making you laugh softly.
“You’ll have to tell me the plan tomorrow.” You say before getting the courage to lean in and press a soft kiss to Tim’s cheek.
“Goodnight, y/n,” Tim says softly, pulling you into a hug and pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head as you whisper goodnight in response. When Tim pulls away, you both whisper one final goodnight before he backs off, making his way back to his truck as you make your way into the house, heading up to your room and wasting no time in getting ready for bed and climbing under your sheets with a smile. As you curled up in bed, you couldn’t help but let out a small sigh of relief, you’d gotten the courage to do something you thought was impossible and now you had a bigger support system than ever.
You’d be okay.
Tim Tags (comment or ask to be added):
@callsigns-haze @fore45fore @reignsboy19 @xi1dius @plutotcles @lives-in-midgard @mystical-258 @malindacath @cuntyvicodin @brewolfhowl @child-of-the-sunshine
#justabigassnerd#justabigassnerd writes#the rookie#the rookie abc#the rookie fic#the rookie fanfic#the rookie imagine#tim bradford#tim bradford the rookie#tim bradford fic#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford x you#tim bradford x y/n#tim bradford imagine#tim bradford x fem!reader
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Every time Pedro dies onscreen, suggested by @lokischocolatefountain (spoiler follow):
Eddie, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, 4x01 The Freshman (1999)
Kevin “Kip” Green, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, 8x08 The Glory That Was... (2009)
Special Agent Greer, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, 12x24 Smoked (2011)
Liam, Nikita, 3x08 Aftermath (2013)
Oberyn Martell, Game of Thrones, 4x08 The Mountain and the Viper
Agent Juan Badillo, Graceland, 1x09 Smoke Alarm
Max Phillips, Bloodsucking Bastards (2015)
Jack “Agent Whiskey” Daniels, Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)
Dave York, The Equalizer 2 (2019)
*Thank you to @xxhypersomnia for reminding me about Dieter's overdose in The Bubble (2022)
Dieter Bravo as Gio in Cliffbeasts 6, The Bubble (2022)
Santos The Penis Collector, Drive Away Dolls (2024)
And finally...
General Acacius, Gladiator 2 (2024)
#buffy the vampire slayer#Kevin Kip green#special agent Greer#oberyn martell#Juan badillo#max phillips#agent whiskey#jack daniels#dave york#dieter bravo#the penis collector#pedro pascal
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Spoilers Ahead... From Here To The Great Unknown.
Okay.. I've finally finished Lisa's book. I listened to the audiobook version on Spotify because my copy from Graceland probably isn't coming until later this week. But anyway, I’m not going to give much away, but I just wanted to talk about it for a moment because I did cry towards the end of the book and I needed a moment to process everything. I just wanna say the way Riley told her mother’s story and helped her tell her own story was beautiful. This was such a great book and I highly recommend listening to the audio version of it because it’s even more emotional.
Now I know after reading this some of you are going to act kind of.. wild because of the parts about Priscilla. Which I can totally understand. But let's remember to keep it respectful if someone has a difference of opinion from you. I feel like everyone just wanted to know about the Priscilla parts of this book. Which I find kind of odd because Lisa’s story is amazing and just her life overall and everything she’s been through and just motherhood being something she was the best at. If trying to get dirt on Priscilla is the only reason you’re reading this book, that’s sad.
That being said.. After reading this book regarding the parts about Priscilla.. I still don’t hate this woman. Because if you have never experienced this sort of relationship with your mother like Lisa and Priscilla had. You could never understand. There were parts where I was completely disappointed in Priscilla and her actions and for not protecting her daughter more and being so worried about a man more than her daughter. But sometimes mothers are like that. They put a man before their child. But I have to remember I don’t know her story. Not really or how she was brought up or raised. I don’t know what she could’ve gone through There’s a part in the beginning of the book where Lisa is talking about her mom and how she wishes she was her mom because she felt bad for her and sympathized with her. She said the same thing about her grandma (Priscilla’s mom). Which was so sad. I feel like Priscilla becoming young parent when she clearly wasn’t ready to be a mom yet was probably the wrong thing for her. She still had a bit of selfishness that you can’t have when you’re a parent. Sometimes when you’re not ready to be one it’s probably hard to get rid of that. Priscilla and Lisa never made things easy on one another at all. They were always hurting each other. Elvis dying didn’t make this easy for them because Lisa was lost and Priscilla seemed to be still figuring out her life and I truly feel like having to be a mom full time was too much for her especially when Lisa started to rebel and get into drugs at an early age. I think that just made their relationship worse and where that strain came from. But as they both got older they started to connect more mainly for the grand kids, but eventually they did bury the hatchet with one another and realized they put each other through so much. I feel like a lot of relationships with mothers and daughters are like that. Not all. But some. Where they both grow older and realize everything they had done was just silly and they’re able to talk more and connect as adults. But that being said it doesn’t excuse Priscilla being kind of an absent mother but then at the same time wanting Lisa to be this perfect daughter and things being a certain way and having to look a certain way for the outside world.Then being very strict and enforcing the dynamic that “I’m your parent. Not your friend.” which made her kind of cold toward Lisa. That’s a lot of pressure to put on a child who clearly hasn’t grieved the death of her father and obviously didn’t know how. I guess in a way I sympathized with not only Lisa, but Priscilla as well. Because I realized we actually don’t know much about Priscilla outside of Elvis. We don’t know the kind the life she lived as a child besides being an army brat. But we don’t know how her relationship was with her own mother. Usually how you raise your own child sometimes is a mirror of how you were raised. But it was so nice to see that Lisa broke that kind of generational thing when it came to raising her own children and not being anything like her own mother was.
Another thing is Lisa didn’t like anyone that tried to be an authority figure toward her. She never had a connection to Vernon and didn’t really like him because he would be an authority figure whenever she was at Graceland. No one could tell her what to do because if they did she didn’t really care for them. Her mother fell under the same thing. She felt her mother tried to control things and didn’t let her do certain things because she didn’t want her to be spoiled.
I also found it interesting that she saw the relationships between her parents with other people and how they would be when it came to her own children. Whenever she was dating someone new she’d introduce them and then asked her kids what they thought of them. If they didn’t like them, they’d never see them again. Because whoever she was dating she would make sure her children liked them no matter what. Their opinion meant everything. Because she never liked anyone her mother dated and she didn’t like Ginger and felt like she wasn’t right for her dad and that no one else really liked her. I think another thing that stuck out to me the most was that she showed more of the human side of Elvis. I feel like we get that in every book about him but sometimes we don’t know what the truth is or not. But when Lisa would go into his tempers and his anger whenever something didn’t go his way she would go into detail about how everyone would be scared in that moment and sometimes would hide because he tend to throw things. Then stories about how soft he would be toward her and all the fun things they would do and how he would sneak away with her on a golf cart to go visit his dad down at his house but really it was just a way to spend time alone with Lisa. Just the really silly and special moments they had together. He really was the sweetest daddy, but we already knew that. But hearing stories we had never heard before about the two of them was just so sweet to read and it’s so heartbreaking she never really grieved or gotten over his death.
Everything about this book was just so special. So vulnerable. Not just from Lisa but from Riley as well as she filled in the pieces for her mom for things. The struggles Lisa dealt with all her life and the loss. So much loss she had to deal with and never truly recovered from. She says, she’s always been sad. People would always tell her she looks sad and she never realized she had always been sad since the day her dad died. The sadness was always written on her face since that day.
This book was incredible and I’ll probably read it again once my copy comes in the mail.
#lisa marie presley#elvis presley#riley keough#just my thoughts and opinions#don't come spamming my inbox
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Broken Glass Chapter 10 💔🥂❤️🩹
Ahhhh, my babies, we've finally reached the chapter I've been itching to tell you about for ages! And I cannot WAIT to hear what you think about it!
We left off in Chapter 9 with poor Lori fighting physical exhaustion and a gamut of feelings for Elvis (who's being a stubborn idiot), and when they arrived home to Graceland, their frustrations came to a head. Elvis finally confronted her about her past and a terrified Lori didn't take it well.
Now in Elvis' perspective, we pick up immediately after her collapse. He is mortified and lovesick and convinced that he's harmed her beyond repair. Oh, Elvis. 💔
Like I said, I can't wait to hear your screams about the twists in this chapter, so please don't hold back! 😁 I hope you enjoy!
Much Love! xoxoxox, Madi 💗
TW: Please scroll to the end only if you need them--I don't want to spoil anything for those who hate spoilers!
Broken Glass Chapter 10
Shit shit shit shit, Elvis chants in his head as you vomit violently onto the pavement, go grey as a ghost, and your terrified eyes roll back into your head. His lean arms wrap around you quickly when you collapse, keeping you from falling into your own sick or hitting your head on the ground.
“Shit,” he curses, out loud this time, following your center of gravity and scooping you up into his arms. “Lori! Come on, darlin’, wake up f’me,” he pleads softly.
Your body seems awfully tiny and much too light for someone who’s presence he can never truly ignore, even when he wants to. His heart slams in his chest, his blood already up from his temper, though it fizzled out the moment you started shivering and sobbing and apologizing like he was sending you to the gallows. The look of resigned fear on your face was enough to give him nightmares and that was before you’d lost consciousness.
He is no stranger to fainting women, it being a staple of his fame since almost the beginning. While he never could quite understand why he of all people caused such a reaction in young ladies, he was always as calm and gentle as he could be. It was his fault they got overexcited, after all—they couldn’t control it just as much as he couldn’t.
But this was different.
You certainly hadn’t passed out because you were overcome by the joy of his presence. Instead, you look like death, and he’s not remotely calm about it.
“What the hell happened? What’d you do to her?” Gene asks accusatorily, running up behind him, followed by the rest of the guys in various states of concern.
“What’d I do…? Shut yer damn mouth ‘fore ya catch flies, ya idiot, and go call the doctor,” Elvis huffs back, hoisting you up into his arms, swinging around, and hightailing it towards the house.
The fear that lances through him at your pallor and lifelessness hits like a knife. The seed of anger he’s held on to so tightly this last week withers at the thought he’s done real damage here.
This is my fault.
He’s not exactly sure how but he knows. He only had to take one look at your face when he called you out to understand you hadn’t meant to hurt him and your past scared you enough to risk the lie. Stupidly, he’d wanted the satisfaction of confronting your wrongdoing, for you to have a smidge of the hurt he was feeling.
But he never wanted this.
How could he have missed something was wrong? You are so damn strong, meeting every challenge thrown your way that he never considered you might be unwell. Selfish idiot, he chastises himself.
He comes close to kicking down the door to his home, but Charlie scoots around him fast enough to open it before he resorts to property damage.
“Come on, Little Bird, wake up for me,” he murmurs softly as he oh so gently sets you on the long sofa. He hates the boneless way you settle, eyes closed and completely unconscious. Nerves shudder down his spine and he doesn’t bother to hide them.
“Did someone call the damn doctor?” he yells at Charlie.
“Yeah, yeah, he’s on his way.” Charlie has the sense to look worried, unlike his idiot cousin who peers over his shoulder.
“Wipe that dumbass look offa your face and go get her some water!” Elvis snaps at Gene, who looks at him wide eyed for a moment before disappearing.
Brushing a lock of hair off your forehead, he holds and rubs your cold little hand in his as he quietly talks to you.
“I’m sorry, Lo, I-I-I shouldn’t’ve come atchu like that. I-I realize now that, um, maybe you had your reasons f’not telling me ‘bout your past. I jus’ thought you knew you could trust me, and-and it hurt that you din’t and sometimes I just get so mad I can’t see straight but I shouldn’t take it out on you…” he rambles quietly, “Please jus’ wake up, now, you gotta wake up, honey. I can’t do this without ya.” The admission falls breathlessly from his lips, soft as snowfall.
His heart plummets when he thinks about all the ways he’s taken his anger out on you this past week—ignoring you, throwing girls in your face, making snide comments—and his ego wants nothing more to justify his actions, but in truth, you were right. He had been playing mind games and not communicating why he was upset. He should have just asked you about it right after Frank spilled the beans instead of punishing you for something you didn’t even know he’d found out.
Lord, his mama would have his hide for such childish behavior.
Shame flames his cheeks and worries surround him like a dark cloud until the doctor shows up. You still haven’t so much as stirred and it has him nibbling at his nails—a nervous old habit he’s never quite been able to kick.
When Dr. Shaw arrives, Elvis shoos away the audience of men who’ve crowded the living room when he wasn’t looking. At least they all have the sense to look concerned.
“What happened?” Dr. Shaw asks, setting his bag down next to the couch.
“I-I-I don’t know exactly, one minute she was fine, well maybe not fine cuz we were in a bit of a disagreement, ya see, and well, she, maybe she was worked up? One minute she was standing there and the next she lost her lunch on the pavement and passed out,” he says, unsure if he’s making any sense.
“Did she hit her head?” The doctor asks, examining your hairline.
“Naw, I caught her before she hit the ground.” His leg jiggles uncontrollably, wondering if you’re okay, wondering what he could’ve done differently.
Dr. Shaw looks at Elvis over his glasses, taking in his nervousness. “Has she been ill otherwise?”
Elvis blinks. “Um, I-I-I’m not sure.”
The doctor is one of the only people who knows about his illness, who you really are and what you are doing here, so it’s unsurprising he looks a bit incredulous. “Elvis, you’re spending all of your time with this young woman, and you don’t know if she’s been ill or not?”
More shame bleeds through his chest and settles like a stone in his stomach. His face flushes red hot and the temperature in the room seems to have gone up without him noticing.
“Um, no, I-I guess not, sir,” he mumbles.
He knows his faults, and generally being uncaring isn’t one of them. But these past few weeks, he’s been thinking mostly about himself. His feelings. How your secret affected him. Not how it affected you, or why you might need to hide it. You’d tried your best to take care of him, apparently to the detriment of yourself.
No, he’d been mighty careless with you, and spitefully so.
Dr. Shaw gives him a pursed-lip look.
“I, well, now I know the new hours are keepin’ her busy, what with how I gotta live and all. I-I-I guess she’s seemed tired?” Elvis adds, desperate to fill the silence.
He doesn’t feel he can share all the other pieces, like how you’d been on the run from your mafia fiancé who’d…
Oh, Lord.
Dread rolls in his stomach when he realizes his misstep.
The nightmares. You quivering in terror on the bathroom floor. The bruises. Bruises he’d seen staining your body in places no bruise should ever be. The way you’d flinched when he touched you roughly.
Your fiancé had done that to you. That man was the reason you fled New York.
How stupid he was for not putting it all together sooner. Your fiancé hurt you, and you tried to escape the only way you could.
And Elvis was so afraid of loving you, so consumed by his own feelings, he punished you for it. Just another man in your life punishing you for something that wasn’t your fault.
Fuck.
His gut rolls, leaving him queasy. Through his horror, he wonders if you’ll ever be able to forgive him. If you even should.
Your little moan steals his attention as you stir slightly on the sofa.
“Lori?” he asks, jumping to, wanting you so badly to wake up so he can apologize, so he can make it up to you. “Please, baby, you gotta wake up now. The doc is here.” He grabs your hand and doesn’t even care how desperate he sounds.
“Mmm?” Your eyes flutter open and his heart swells to see those crystal blues start to focus.
“What happened?” you moan quietly, rubbing your eyes.
“You, uh, you got sick, darlin’ and then fainted,” he coos but there is an edge of disappointment in it, in himself.
Your eyes narrow and then widen with what he assumes is your memory coming back. He watches the trepidation and embarrassment fill your eyes. You slide your hand out of his, shirking back from him, and his heart crumbles a little.
I did this.
“Dolores, can you tell me what happened? How are you feeling?” the doctor asks.
Your attention pulls away from Elvis, your trepidation clouded by your struggle to focus.
“Oh, I’m sure I’m fine, probably just carsick from the bus ride,” you say, voice wavering, unconvincingly trying to blow off the concern.
“You’re not fuckin’ fine,” Elvis snaps before he can stop himself.
Your eyes widen and Dr. Shaw clears his throat.
“Excuse my language,” he apologizes, then tries to continue more gently, “but you’re not. You’re always gettin’ on me about not tellin’ you what’s what, so now you better answer the doctor’s questions truthfully, honey.”
There’s a beaten, submissive look in your eye that nearly breaks his heart. You turn your attention back to Shaw.
“I’ve had an ongoing headache for days…weeks, maybe? And I am exhausted,” you admit quietly. “Carsick on the rides. It’s probably just a virus. Nothing a l-little rest won’t cure.”
Dr. Shaw purses his lips. “I’d still like to do an examination and some tests. Is there somewhere more private we can go?”
“Upstairs.” Elvis jumps up, eager to be helpful and expend some of the nervous energy coursing through him. He extends his hand to help you off the couch, but you shrink back from him. Stomach churning with guilt, he watches as you warily push yourself off the couch to standing.
You wobble and sway on your feet, and his instinct kicks in as he immediately swoops his arm under you and lifts.
“Elvis, stop, I can get up the stairs by myself,” you protest halfheartedly, but by the way your body sags against him, he doesn’t believe you.
“Hush.”
Scowling, you don’t fight anymore, your eyes getting a dim and faraway look when your head plops on his shoulder with defeat. It’s worrisome.
By the time he maneuvers you up the stairs and into the bedroom, his growing unease has taken root. And it grows more when he sets you on the bed and you look like a shadow of your usual self. Like darkness is trying to swallow you whole and you are letting it.
He looks at Shaw, his eyes trying to convey the deep concern he now feels for your wellbeing, the concern that should’ve been there for weeks if not for his head being wedged so far up his own ass he refused to see what was right in front of him.
“Thank you, Elvis,” Shaw says, “Now, I’ll need some privacy to do the examination.” The doctor nods his head towards the door, dismissing him.
“Aw, hell no. I’m not leavin’ her like this.” He shakes his head stubbornly. The thought of her alone with any man but him suddenly makes his skin crawl, even though he’s known Shaw for years.
“Elvis, I’ve got her. Go. I’ll be down to update you in a bit.” Shaw’s voice is gentle but firm, leaving no room for question.
Elvis clenches his fists, his nostrils flaring.
Breathe. In, out.
It’s your voice saying it. He looks to you, sitting stock still against the pillows, staring into space, and realizes your voice is only in his head. It’s both heart-wrenching and comforting.
Finally, he nods curtly, then leaves his—our—room, shutting the door quietly behind him, resisting the urge to leave it open just a crack in order to listen in, to make sure no harm comes to you. But even in his current state, he knows that is overstepping. He forces himself to walk down the stairs, his mind churning.
After pacing the length of the house multiple times, beating himself up for his poor treatment of you, furious at your former fiancé for hurting you, and tying himself into knots with worst-case scenarios, he eventually finds himself at the piano. The only thing that ever truly quiets his mind is music. His fingers fly over the keys and he pours it all into the spirituals coming to him from deep within his soul.
God loves him best when he sings. Maybe He’ll hear his pleas for forgiveness, his prayers for healing—not for himself, but for you.
Lost in the music, he’s not sure how long he sings, but stops abruptly when Dr. Shaw appears in the doorway.
“Sorry to interrupt,” the doc says.
Elvis waves his arm dismissively. “How is she?”
Shaw hesitates. “It could just be a virus, but I took some blood and urine to test.”
There’s something he’s not saying, Elvis can tell. “And?”
Another pause. “I’m a little concerned about her…state of mind. I know I’ve only met her once or twice, but she seems withdrawn, almost traumatized. You said there was an argument?” He looks at Elvis with an undercurrent of judgement.
Heat blazes across Elvis’ cheeks, while guilt stabs in his belly. “I-I-I…yes, sir, but I’d never hurt her! And I-I don’t think…I-I mean, I don’t know…I think something happened t’her before we met,” he eventually gets out. It’s not his place to share your secrets, but damn if he’s going to let this doctor think he’s hurt you physically.
Dr. Shaw’s eyebrow raises, but he doesn’t press. He looks over Elvis with pursed lips and a watchful eye before his gaze softens.
“Can I go up and see her?” Elvis asks, almost desperately.
Shaw nods. “But she needs to rest. Stay off her feet. Eat well, if she can, and drink plenty of fluids.” Not run around after your ass, is the unspoken instruction. “Make sure she’s doing those things but…I wouldn’t press her.”
“Yessir.”
There’s tension hanging in the air before the subject is changed. “How are you feeling? Do we to have someone else step in until Ms. Cannava is well?”
Elvis grimaces, shaking his head. The last thing he needs is someone else poking around in his business, in your business. “I’m alright, sir. Probably could use a little R & R myself.”
Shaw looks at him with a critical eye. “Alright, son. Let’s keep it low-key, shall we? I’ll be back tomorrow to check in and hopefully we’ll have some answers.”
And with that, Elvis sees the doctor out.
He lasts approximately 90 seconds before he runs to the kitchen to fetch a glass of water and takes the stairs quickly enough that he spills half the glass before he makes it to his room.
“Knock, knock,” he says gently, opening the door. You are laying on your side now, away from him, curled in on yourself on top of the covers and the sight nearly does him in for how vulnerable you look.
“Doc said you need plenty of fluids, so I brought you some water,” he rambles, coming around and setting the glass on the stand next to the bed. “Can I getchu anythin’ else?”
You blink slowly, but don’t respond otherwise. His stomach drops. It’s unnerving, the way you’re staring through him at the wall, vacant and broken.
He can’t have done this, right? Not like this. There’s got to be more to this than a silly fight.
You’re a fuckin’ asshole, the voice in his head berates. He wants to disagree but can’t. But this isn’t the time for him to feel sorry for himself. Standing here being useless isn’t helping anyone.
What would Little Bird do? The thought snaps him into action. “Imma gonna just take off these shoes a’ yours, okay?” he says gently, not wanting to startle you. With care, he takes off your heels one by one, setting them on the carpet at the end of the bed. He wants you to be comfortable but hesitates to undress you, unsure if that would be crossing a line. But he can’t well leave you to sleep in the clothes you wore on the bus for near a day.
After a minute of indecision, he plows forward. “Alright, honey, I’m just going to help you out of these clothes, just down to your slip, okay? Nothin’ more, don’t you worry.”
You don’t fight him at all, wordlessly allowing him to move you upright and undo your blouse. There’s certainly nothing untoward about the way his fingers manage the buttons or how they unzip your skirt. It’s not the way he ever wanted to be doing these things, though, he thinks as he strips your clothes and pulls down the spread on the bed. You have no outward reaction to him lying you down and pulling the covers up over your body, other than letting your eyes fall closed.
He thinks back to the care you’ve shown him when he’s been such in a state, and it’s what gets him through the feeling of helplessness churning in his gut.
Once you are tucked in, he grabs his own pajamas. He’s got no urge to leave you or deal with the idiots downstairs. No, even though his mind is going, he joins you in the bed, attempting to read the book on his nightstand while worry nags at him. Eventually, his eyes droop closed and the darkness takes him, too.
*
You are a bit more responsive the next day, eating a bite of the toast and jam he’d brought up for you, but you stay in bed, eerily quiet and entirely too withdrawn for his liking. He does his damnedest to follow Dr. Shaw’s instructions and leave you be, but it’s nearly impossible for him to not check on you multiple times an hour.
Honestly, he’s not sure you even register his presence half the time and fuck if that doesn’t stab him straight through the heart.
Charlie and the other boys do their best to distract him, but he’s got no humor for the usual fun and games. No, he’s much too wrapped up in his own head, vacillating from wanting to punch his way through the wall and being so lovesick he feels nauseous. The only thing keeping him from totally spiraling is the fact you are still here and alive and in his bed. He hasn’t lost you yet, he doesn’t think.
He can’t lose you.
By the time Dr. Shaw arrives in the evening, Elvis is about ready to jump down his throat with questions. “Is she gonna be okay?”
“Let’s go upstairs, son,” Dr. Shaw says, in a somewhat ominous tone. If the doc wants him there for the conversation, the news can’t be good.
Elvis’ heart knocks against his ribs with each step closer he gets to you. You can’t be sick. He’s only just found you and Lord, does he need you more than he needs air. If he’s learned nothing else, it’s that.
Fidgeting, he lets the doctor in the room, following close behind.
“How are you feeling today, Lori?” Dr. Shaw asks, sitting near you on the edge of the bed.
Your usually bright and savvy eyes seem dull as you take the effort to focus on the doctor and his question. “I’m tired,” you whisper sluggishly, shrugging.
“Well, I think we have an answer as to the reason for that,” Shaw says kindly, then motions to him. “Elvis, why don’t you sit?” He gets up from the bed, offering Elvis his spot.
Oh, God, it’s that bad. His dinner threatens to make a reappearance, but he swallows the bile down, sinking onto the bed near your legs.
Dr. Shaw clears his throat. “Ahem, well, Lori, the good news is I don’t think you are sick in the real sense of the word.”
A wave of elation hits Elvis. Thank you, Jesus.
“You are, however, pregnant.”
The crest hits, disbelief slamming into him, taking his breath away in a whoosh.
“How’s that possible?” It falls out of his mouth immediately and without thinking, imbued with much too much innocence after his jaw hits the floor.
A deeply biological sense of panic washes over him then because it is most unmarried men’s nightmare, especially a man like him, to be blindsided by news like this. But his biology and his brain aren’t on the same level because it takes him longer than it should to reconcile there is absolutely no way this child is his.
This isn’t technically his mess.
But the doctor doesn’t know that and peers over his spectacles with a raised eyebrow. “I trust I don’t have to give you a talk about the birds and the bees, Elvis.”
A flush of heat hits his cheeks and he shakes his head. “No, sir.”
All at once, the gravity of the situation sinks in. The bruises. Your fiancé. That fuckin’ monster. The slightly judgmental way Shaw is looking at Elvis because in the doc’s mind, Elvis is the one who got you in trouble.
Shit.
Finally, his head turns to you. Your olive skin is deathly pale, your icy eyes more intense than usual and shining with unshed tears as you stare straight ahead. Your fingers twist around and around themselves, something he’s noticed you do when you are nervous.
Elvis lightly places his hand on your shin and your eyes whip to his for the first time in over a day. At least you don’t flinch at his touch this time. Instead, his touch seems to ground you and he watches carefully as you come back into yourself and out of wherever your head has held you prisoner since he yelled at you yesterday.
Dr. Shaw looks at the both of you before continuing. “It’s very early days, my guess is—”
“Four weeks,” you finish, the pain of knowing exactly how long etched in your features. It makes his heart ache for you, and more than anything he wants to find the man who did this to you and make him regret he was ever born. But now isn’t the time for all that.
Four weeks is the same amount of time you’ve known each other, meaning this happened after he’d already met you.
How?
“Yes, and anything can happen in these early days, as you well know. I know this is a…delicate situation.” There is unspoken subtext in the doctor’s words, and while Elvis is piecing it out, you seem to understand immediately. The look you give him is heavy and filled with words you cannot say out loud yet. The silence sits heavy between you two.
The doctor takes his cue. “You two have a lot to talk about. Why don’t I come back tomorrow to do your exam and get you set up with what you’ll need going forward? Keep your activity light for now.”
You nod. “Thank you, Dr. Shaw,” you whisper.
Elvis stares at you, trying to psychically glean what you are thinking, but your eyes have shuttered and his own thoughts are going a mile a minute. It’s hard to focus until after he sees the doctor to the door.
“Doc, this probably goes without saying, but we need to keep a lid on this,” Elvis says quietly. He’s too much in shock to understand all the ramifications just yet, but he knows this world is unkind to unmarried young ladies who find themselves in the family way, even if it wasn’t their fault.
He’s got to protect you.
“Of course, Elvis. The same discretion I apply to you will apply to her, don’t worry son,” the man says, patting his back in solidarity.
He ignores the concerned and curious looks from the guys in the living room as he takes the stairs two at a time, his anxiety rising the more he’s away from you.
Skidding through the door, he grinds to a halt when he sees the empty bed. Frantically, he looks around the room, finding you in the closet.
“Little Bird, what’re you doin’?” he says, watching in disbelief as you start pulling clothes and throwing them on the bed before dragging your suitcase, which had only been put away yesterday, back out into the room.
“I have to go,” you say, deliberately not looking at him as you rummage in the closet.
“Go?” he asks stupidly. “Go where?”
“I don’t know…maybe out West somewhere. Canada, maybe,” you mumble, as if this a normal conversation.
His pulse thunders in his head. “What…no, why do you think you’re goin’ anywhere in your condition?”
“I’m not an invalid, Elvis, I’m pregnant,” you scoff. “I’m—” your breath hitches for a moment, your shaking hand revealing your true feelings no matter how calm you are trying to appear. “This isn’t on you, and I know you were getting ready to let me go because I lied to you, which I’ve accepted, but I had no idea…I should’ve known. And I thought I’d have more time to get ready…”
His mouth might be catching flies for how dumbfounded he feels as he tries to follow your rambling train of thought. You scurry into the bathroom and rustle around before returning with some of your things, which you dump haphazardly into the suitcase.
“I know you were getting ready to let me go…” circles round in his head a few times before it hits.
You’re running. And you seem to think it’s what he wants.
“Stop.” The command is low and firm.
You freeze in the closet for a moment before grabbing another armful of dresses, ones he bought you even though you insisted you didn’t need anything.
“Dolores, stop this right now and sit yer ass down, goddammit!” he raises his voice, pointing to the bed.
Finally halting, he watches a shudder run through you before you defeatedly sit on the very edge of the bed, your arms full of clothes. Refusing to look at him. He can’t tell if you are more afraid or ashamed, but either makes his heart crumble and the thought of you leaving has him wanting to break in two.
He sinks to his knees in front of you, desperately wanting to take your hands in his own but not wanting to overstep in your fragile state. He softens his voice like he’s going to sing a lullaby.
“Little Bird, I don’t want you to go. Why would you say that?” It comes out too pleadingly, but he can’t bring himself to care.
You blink rapidly, once, twice, processing his words, the unemotional mask you are trying so hard to keep on your face cracking. “You…you were so angry I lied and have every right to be! I thought you’d want me gone as soon as you found someone new,” you whisper.
“Honey, no—”
“And now, as if Gianni hadn’t already done his worst, now I’m…I’m pregnant.” Your voice chokes and the façade finally collapses as sobs wrack your shoulders.
Elvis can’t stand it any longer, sinking onto the bed next to you, pulling you into his arms. You go stiff for a second, resisting, but he squeezes, and you relent, your head falling on his shoulder, tiny hand clutching the fabric of his shirt like a lifeline.
Every quiet sob coming from you breaks his heart a little. He still doesn’t know you like he wants to but knows without a doubt you didn’t deserve to be hurt like this. You don’t deserve to bear the consequences of an evil man’s actions.
Gianni.
That was the name you said. Rage simmers deep in his stomach, but now is not the time to plot that asshole’s demise, no matter how much he wants to. Right now, Elvis has to make sure you don’t do something stupid, like leave him and run to Canada.
His shirt soaks with your tears. The damp sticks to his skin and should be uncomfortable yet it’s not. It’s proof you are here, with him, and he holds onto that.
“Breathe, baby. Just like you showed me—in, out, in, out,” he coos.
Sobs turn to sniffles. Your body shivers but fights for those slower breaths, your grip on him loosening as you seem to calm. He is lulled, too, his racing mind given reprieve for a moment, distracted by your presence in his arms.
Heavy silence fills the space.
“I have to go,” you whisper, sounding pragmatic and defeated, but calm. Peeling yourself from the cocoon of his arms, you stand abruptly.
He grabs you gently by the wrist, turning you back to him. “Din’t you hear me, lil’ one? I don’t want you to go. I-I’m sorry I been such an ass. I-I-I shoulda just asked ya what happened instead o-of punishing ya for somethin’ I din’t understand.” Desperation he’s unaccustomed to feeling leeches into his voice.
He looks up into your shining eyes, hating the warring resignation on your pretty features.
“Elvis…” you begin, stepping away, “you have every right to be angry but—"
“No, n-no…I mean, yeah, I was, but that doesn’t matter now. Please, Little Bird.”
You pause. “I need to leave.” You start putting things in your suitcase, much slower this time.
His heart cracks a little more with every beat. “No, Lori. You…listen, I-I-I’ll be a much better patient, I promise. I’ll stick to your diet and routine and all that shit.” He tries to make light but your face fixes in a determined scowl.
You just shake your head resolutely.
Finally, he grasps your hands. “Honey, ain’t you hearin’ me? I’m sorry, so fuckin’ sorry, an’ I don’t admit that very often cuz I’m a stubborn ol’ goat, but I’m sayin’ it now. I don’t want you to go. So, stop this nonsense and talk to me!”
Quiet tears streak down your cheeks and you try to blink them away as you look down at him.
“I hear you. But you don’t understand—you’re not thinking, Elvis. I’ve got to go. I’ve got to go to save you,” you plead.
“What?” He can’t hide his confusion.
“I already put a target on your back. And if Gianni finds out I’m…he’s coming after me. Whether today or tomorrow or a year from now, I feel it in my bones, and I’ve put you right in the crossfire.”
“I can take care of myself,” he bristles.
You shake your head. “It’s not just that. Once the press gets wind of this—” you motion to your belly “—it won’t be good for either of us. If I go now and disappear, you’ll have a chance.” Your sentence ends in a whisper.
He blinks once, twice, trying to absorb what you’re saying. But all the logic in the world doesn’t change his heart. It doesn’t change how much he…
“I need you,” he admits, staring right into your eyes, unwaveringly.
Your lip quivers. “I can’t.” You look away before speaking again. “I’m sure Colonel can find you someone else who can fulfill your needs.”
Fuck. He’s losing you; you are slipping right through his fingers. Frustration fills him with frantic desperation.
“You ain’t gettin’ it, Dolores. I don’t need some other nurse, I need you, goddammit!”
His voice is loud in the small space, echoing briefly before the sound gets sucked into the sound proofing.
“Elvis…” you whisper, eyes going wide with questions he can’t answer, not now.
“Listen—jus’ listen to me, okay? There’s gotta be somethin’, cuz I sure as hell ain’t lettin’ you out there by yourself to get hurt by those goons. I’ll fend ‘em off myself.” His brain whirls, trying to see his way through the problem.
“No, Elvis, you don’t understand! This isn’t the movies! Gianni, my father, the famiglia—those ‘goons’—they are dangerous. Lethal. They’ll stop at nothing to get what they want. And if Frank knows I left, it means even if they can’t get to you physically, they can do worse to your reputation and your career—everything you’re working so hard to keep.”
Your face blanches and your entire body goes tense. “And if Gianni finds out I’m pregnant with his child, even you might not be safe from him. Oh, Madone, I should have never come here.” Green tinges your face and you bolt for the bathroom.
His heart races, slamming against his ribcage again and again. You paint a bleak picture, and your fear is contagious. But the fear of never seeing you again, of you being out there alone and in danger, strikes not only dread in his heart, but a protective fervor he’s never quite felt before.
An idea comes to him then in a flash, and the sound of your retching snaps him into action. Whether it’s terror or the baby, or both, it has you so in knots you are sick, and he can’t have that.
A few weeks ago, he may have been able to tell himself it’s because you are a good nurse, that he doesn’t want to train some new girl when you already know what you are doing, and that’s why he’s about to do something either wildly clever or wildly stupid. But he’d be lying.
He feels like he’s buzzing from the inside out with nerves, almost like the feeling he gets when doing a live show. It’s equally terrifying and exhilarating and addicting and maybe it’s God’s way of letting him know he’s on the right path.
Barely aware of how he got there, he’s in the bathroom, wetting a washcloth and crouching down next to you by the toilet. Not how he ever imagined this would go, but here he is anyway, brushing the hair off your cheeks. He’s so far gone for you, the sick doesn’t even phase him as he wipes your face.
None of it phases him enough to let you go.
You don’t want to look at him, he can tell, but you finally do, your ice blue irises vibrant against your bloodshot eyes, looking defeated and scared and miserable. But still beautiful. Always beautiful.
“Marry me.”
He says it with a quiet confidence only he could muster, despite the pounding of his heart.
You blink in shock, straightening. “W-what?”
“Marry me.”
“Elvis, you can’t be—”
He holds up his hand, halting her reply. “And before you say no, hear me out.”
Your mouth snaps shut in bewilderment.
“Doc said it was early. So, if we get married real soon—love-at-first-sight and all that—it’s still plausible to those without details everything is on the up and up, right?”
Your eyes narrow a little as you work through it. “I…I suppose so, if all goes well.”
A thought comes to him suddenly, threatening to ruin his plan, but he has to say it or he won’t forgive himself for not giving you the out. “I shoulda asked…I-I mean…there are other ways to solve this, less legal ones, but I’d pay for it if that’s what you want. I wouldn’t blame ya, considerin’ the circumstances,” he says almost bashfully.
It takes you a second to glean his meaning, your face going more ashen than it was already. “Oh. Oh, no. I…I’m Catholic. I don’t…that’s not an option for me.”
“Okay.” He nods, knowing he needs to continue, “T-There’s also adoption. I won’t force you to raise this baby, even if it looks bad for me…I-I-I would never do that to ya.”
Your eyes fill with tears again, a gamut of emotions running through them. “I don’t think I want that either,” you say quietly.
The weight of that settles between them for a moment before he clears his throat. “Alrighty. I hate to ask this, but you said ‘four weeks’ earlier…so did he hurt you after we met? How—how long were y’all together?” It all leaves a bad taste in his mouth to ask, but he needs to know in order to make this work.
Your eyes close painfully. When you open them, there is resolve there, covering your suffering. “We weren’t. Not really. Gianni set his sights on me a long time ago, and my father…well, Gianni’s family is powerful, and Pop knew a marriage between us would raise his status in the famiglia. My mother didn’t want it, but when she died…well, I had to help raise my brothers, and I was too young, anyway. Then, I escaped by going to nursing school and managed to avoid him for a while, but…,” you take a deep, shuddering breath to keep going. “…but the day after we met in the hospital, he cornered me after my shift. He, um, proposed, and I froze. I didn’t say yes, but I-I was paralyzed, and he took that as acceptance. Then he brought me home to an empty house and…stole what he thought was already his.”
Elvis squeezes his fists so hard his knuckles go white. He has never been a particularly violent man, not finding pleasure in it like some men. Even in his bouts of bad temper, his anger is usually taken out on inanimate objects rather than people, but right now the rage he feels at Gianni is downright murderous. He’d like to rip this man’s heart out of his chest for what he’s done to you.
He swallows the bitter pill of his rage, though, tempered by the anguish in your eyes. A single tear streaks down your cheek and before he can stop himself, he’s cupping your face and pressing his forehead to yours.
“Never again, Little Bird. As long as I have breath in my lungs, nobody’s gonna hurt you again.”
You suck in air sharply, then your body shudders on your exhale.
“You can’t promise that,” you whisper tearfully. “I can’t ask you to promise that.”
“Well, I am, and you know better than anybody I don’ take kindly to bein’ told what to do or not do, so you better save us all the trouble and jus’ accept it,” he says, and while there is humor in it, he’s never been more serious.
He fights every instinct in him that wants to kiss your lips, instead pressing his own to your forehead, wishing he could give you some semblance of peace. Pulling back before he does something stupid, he gently wipes your tear-stained cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. You let him, and he supposes that’s enough for right now.
“Does anyone know what he did, besides me?” he asks, hating that he must.
“No, not unless Gianni told someone. I didn’t even tell anyone he’d proposed. I just went to work and then Colonel offered me this job and I realized it was my only chance to escape. I didn’t even say goodbye to my brothers in person. I’m so sorry I lied and put you in this position,” you say, voice cracking with emotion.
“You were jus’ tryin’ to survive, honey. No one can fault you for that. I’m glad you got away.” And he is, he thinks, as he smooths your hair. He nearly gets trapped in the blue of your mournful eyes before he snaps himself out of it. He’s got to focus.
“The timeline works out, then, darlin’. Even if people believe we did the deed before marriage, there’s no reason for them to think it’s anyone’s but mine. Gettin’ married cements it, ‘specially with this new, a-dult image Colonel is tryin’ to push of me.”
Colonel is gonna hate this.
“Colonel is never—” you start, seemingly on the same wavelength.
“I know, which means there’s gotta be no doubt in anyone’s mind this baby is mine.”
Your eyes go wide in understanding. You haven’t said yes yet, but he knows how logical and practical you are. He’s got to make you see this is the only way.
“Will Colonel believe it, though? He knows we—I—didn’t take to this arrangement so easily in the beginning.”
“We gotta make him. And I think you continue to underestimate my powers of seduction,” he jokes, wiggling his brow, trying to lighten the increasingly heavy mood.
You sigh. “Be serious, Elvis.”
“I am. It doesn’t matter what really happened, honey, it matters what people think happened. And I’m bein’ honest when I say it won’t take much for most to believe we fell in love and you fell into my arms. Or vice versa. My, um, reputation’s gonna work in our favor.” Heat flames his cheeks, which he knows is silly, but he plays it off with a smirk.
Your eyebrow quirks, but you leave it at that.
He rambles on, “And I don’t know this, um, family of yours, but I’m guessin’ even Gianni is gonna have a hard time provin’ anythin’ if you’re married to one of the most famous men in the world. I can’t imagine even the mob will try an’ steal ya out from under me, so to speak. Not with our ‘love story’ pasted across the world in black and white for all to see. It keeps you and the baby safe.”
You go quiet and still, and he can see the wheels in your head turning. “I…okay. Maybe, just maybe, you’re on to something,” you finally relent.
His heart jumps and he can’t help the proud grin spreading across his face from your almost-praise.
“But Elvis, this is too much to ask of you. This is your life. I know you had no plans to get married, at least anytime soon—”
“Plans change,” he throws back, quickly and a little too adamantly.
“Not like this.”
“Things changed the minute I got this diagnosis, honey,” he adds soberly.
You go quiet, as though with everything going on you forgot what you were doing here in the first place.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” you apologize.
Elvis shrugs it off. But he doesn’t want your pity. No, he wants you safe, and he wants you to stay. And he’s man enough to admit this isn’t all for your benefit. He’s being selfish here, too, because, somehow, you’ve wrapped yourself around his heart and the idea of you ever leaving him fills him with despair.
You continue, “I hear what you’re saying, I do, but, Elvis, I’m afraid you’re not thinking this through entirely. You’re offering to raise another man’s child as your own, offering to marry someone who you don’t love…there’s no going back from that, especially when there’s a child involved.”
He swallows thickly, but not because he’s in doubt. Anything but. The image in his head of you smiling and laughing as he plays with the baby, of early morning whispers of love and sharing a bed in more than just name, of you helping fill the rooms of this damn mansion he bought for his mama with gorgeous blue-eyed children…it is so enticing and so close he can’t bear to think what might happen if you don’t say yes.
I love you.
And even if you can only give your trust in him to keep you safe and help raise your child and nothing else, he would still rather have you at his side and love you in secret than not have you at all.
God, how I love you.
If he let the words fall out of his mouth right now, would you agree, or would they send you running?
He can’t chance it. Not with the state you’re in now. So he steels himself instead, using the charm God gave him to get you to understand.
“Honey, I know what you’re sayin’, and it don’t change a thing.”
Those eyes of yours go wide, and he can tell there’s something you’re debating on sharing. A few moments pass while he lets you deliberate.
“Elvis, you need to know before…,” you trail off. You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. “This is it for me. Maybe it’s old fashioned, but with my beliefs, even in this insane situation, this wouldn’t be temporary. Gianni, my father…it’s possible they’ll never stop trying to get to me. And in my world, marriage is forever. Divorce is not an option. I…I can’t bear to think I’m the one ever keeping you from true happiness, from a love and children of your own. Instead, you’re getting a sullied wife who shackled you in a moment of need and who you’ll come to regret. I can’t have you regret me, Elvis.” Tears pool in your eyes and if he wasn’t already on his knees, he thinks this would have brought him there.
This is a tipping point, just like the moment the doctor handed him his diagnosis. Nothing will be the same after today, for either of you. God has a plan, he’d thought when you’d shown back up in his hospital room at just the right moment, and it hits him now—he swears on his dear mama—it was all leading to this.
“There’s no me without you anymore, darlin’. Who else is gonna take care of me? Who else can I trust with my life? I’m helping you and your baby, yes, but you’re keeping me alive, too. And you aren’t ‘sullied’,” he says with more conviction than he’s said anything before, his voice trembling with all the words he cannot say to you yet. He can only pray you see him, too.
The welling tears in your eyes overflow once more, and it cuts him to not know what you’re thinking, to think he’s the one making you cry this time.
“Don’t be sad, honey, please,” he whispers, begs. “I can’t bear to make you cry.” Unable to stop himself, he brushes your cheeks with his fingers, cupping one in his hand.
The way you lean into him is so slight he might be imagining it, but it’s enough to give him an ounce of hope, one he latches onto immediately.
“I’m not crying because I’m sad, not about you anyway. I’m crying because I can’t believe you’re willing to do this for me. You hardly know me,” you weep.
“I know enough.” And I’d do anything for you.
You close your eyes, dark lashes clumped with tears fanning across your cheeks. “Can you…can you give me a minute?” you say, not unkindly.
“Y-Yeah, yeah, o-of course,” he stutters, his heart fluttering nervously as he stands. Holding out his hand, he helps you up off the floor, making sure you’re steady on your feet before letting go. “I-I’ll be in there, when you’re ready.”
The door to the bathroom shuts behind him and he hears the faucet running. Waiting has never been his strong suit, which he’s brutally reminded of as the minutes tick by. He tries to sit on the bed, but he can’t keep still and jumps up immediately, running a hand through his hair while pacing the room.
But as much as he should be doubting his decisions, he’s not. He should be questioning his damn sanity, proposing to you like that—a woman he’s known all of a month who comes with more baggage than an airliner—but honestly, he’s never felt so sure of something in his life.
Sure, Elvis from five weeks ago may have sent him to the looney bin for offering to marry a girl and raise another (apparently very dangerous) man’s child, but that Elvis hadn’t been handed a death sentence and a ticking clock. That Elvis didn’t know his Little Bird.
That Elvis didn’t love her.
Hell, he’s much more worried you’ll leave out of some hairbrained thought he’s better off without you and get caught by Gianni, who he’s absolutely certain will hurt you in ways you never thought possible if he catches you.
No, Elvis isn’t scared you’ll say yes—he’s terrified you won’t.
He can’t begin to think of the despair he’ll feel if you disappear. Selfishly, he’s not sure he can stand to take another heartbreak, not now. It would be a cruel joke for God to put you in his life and then rip you away just when he needs you the most.
It makes him think of his mama and the gaping wound of her loss that’s only begun to heal. All Mama ever wanted for him was to be settled and happy, with a good woman by his side. He hadn’t understood why at the time. He’d wanted to focus on his career, to be free, to enjoy his youth and all the perks of his fame. But God humbled him right quick, first by sending him off to the Army, then by taking his mama. Since then, he’d spent too much time falling into the arms of woman after woman both drowning his sorrows and in the hopes he’d find the one to magically fill the void left in his heart.
Yet all of it led a path straight to you. And there’s something serendipitous about it he can’t ignore, no matter how batty it all might seem.
So, he best convince you to stay.
After what seems like an eternity, the bathroom door swings open. Your color is still drawn and sallow, the dark circles under your deep-set eyes more pronounced than usual, but you are hauntingly beautiful. Silent, you glide your way towards him slowly, your face shuttered in that way of yours, giving nothing away. His blood thunders in his ears and he hopes you cannot hear it.
You stop before him, mere inches away. Anticipation itches under his skin as his pulse ratchets up. He jumps when you place your palm flat on his chest, right over his heart, the way he knows you do to ground yourself.
Well, hell, there’s no hiding now, not when he knows you can feel just how fast you have his heart beating. You’re probably counting his pulse and getting ready to tell him to relax.
But you don’t. You don’t speak at all. You stare at your hand over his heart and wait, but he’s not sure what for. It’s not until his lungs scream for air that he realizes he’s holding his breath. He feels like he’s going to float away and finds himself shakily breathing in. He knows you feel it. His hand covers yours, anchoring him to you, trying to prove he means everything he’s told you and so much more he can’t yet say.
Finally, your eyes raise up to meet his so intensely he might have been knocked off his feet if he wasn’t locked onto your hand so tightly, feeling his heart thrum against your palm.
“Lori—”
Your finger shushes him, pulling against the fullness of his lips. The touch is electric, zinging through every nerve in his body and buzzing around his chest. He doesn’t understand what’s happening until you’re on your tiptoes, your cold little hand pulling down on his jaw.
The two of you have kissed before, of course, but always for an audience, and even then, you’ve never once initiated it. So, when your lips meet his so softly, he’s taken aback with disbelief.
You don’t waver, however, through the milliseconds it takes him to recover his wits, waiting patiently until every sense in his body hums to life all at once. His heart swells and his belly tingles and then he’s kissing you back, as gently as he can, swearing he won’t be careless with you again.
He wants to devour you but doesn’t want to scare you, doesn’t want to ruin this blissful, unbelievable little moment where your lips are pressed so chastely against his own, using them to say all the things neither of you can seem to say out loud.
The sliver of logic still left in his brain tries to convince him this slice of vulnerability you’re sharing with him is likely nothing more than a show of gratitude, but his aching heart can’t tell the difference.
So there’s no helping the way his other hand falls to your waist, cinching there, pulling you closer. Your minty breath puffs against him in surprise, then he’s gently chasing your mouth with his, unable to stop himself—the hope of it all, of what could be, is too consuming. He can’t stop the way it blossoms through him, opening pieces of him he didn’t know existed.
It’s dangerous, this hope, but Lord have mercy, he can’t bring himself to care about the risks. Not when you’re in his arms like this. Not when he needs you like he needs oxygen.
This little kiss is like heaven, he realizes, because you are giving it freely. It’s not for show; it’s not begrudging or afraid. No, a kiss like this from you means only one thing:
It’s an answer.
A promise.
Or it’s a goodbye, you idiot.
The horror of that possibility squeezes his throat, threatening to choke him, but he pushes it away fiercely.
When the sweet kiss breaks, he finds himself winded even though he shouldn’t be, his head bowed and pressing into yours. He threads his fingers through yours over his wildly beating heart. Anything to keep you tethered to him.
Not one kiss out of the hundreds he’s had in his life has ever knocked him flat quite like this.
“You don’t have to do this, Elvis. You are offering me so much—too much—and I don’t know how much I can give you in return…I—,” you whisper, voice wavering.
“You’re enough,” he manages to get out, not wanting to hear the rest. And it’s true. God help him, it’s true.
You breathe in a little gasp of air, one that makes his heart flip. Then your crystal eyes raise to meet his.
“Then, yes, Elvis Presley, I’ll marry you.”
*
TW: physical illness (fainting, vomiting), dissociation, Gianni and references to previous sexual assault, lots of cussing, unplanned pregnancy due to sexual assault, brief allusions to abortion
*
Thank you for reading, liking, commenting, and reblogging! It means the world! 💗
Taglist Pt 1
@eliseinmemphis@russian-soft-bitch@tattywood
@sassanoe@thella @suspiciousmidge @hiddlepiddlediddlewiddle@carolinesbookworld @juggernort @aesthetic-lyss @stitchattacks @donnamarie23
@littlebitofgreen@paigevis@bugg06@xhannahbananax03@artlover8992
@18lkpeters@frozenhuntress67@girlblogger2002@kendralavon7@misspresley
@be-my-ally @whositmcwhatsit @vintageshanny @ellie-24 @thatbanditqueen @powerofelvis @from-memphis-with-love
@precious-lil-scoundrel @stylespresleyhearted @prompted-wordsmith @crash-and-cure @elvisgf @lookingforrainbows @fic-over-cannon @godlypresley @ab4eva @whatstruthgottodowithit @elvisabutler @amydarcimarie@idontwanttoputanything @callieselvisobsessed @captainamerica1235-blog @xenaspace3-blog
@simplyamberj@claire-elvisgirl@everythingelvispresley@louisejoy86@deniseinmn @madelynpresley
#oooh can't wait to hear those screams 🤭#broken glass#broken glass ch 10#elvis fanfiction#elvis presley#elvis#if you’re looking for trouble#you came to the right place#elvis presley x reader#elvis x reader#elvis smut#elvis fanfic#elvis x oc#elvis presley fic#elvis x dolores#italian mafia#elvis 1960#post army elvis#elvis fic#angst#slow burn
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Ain’t No One Goin’ Back to Nod Empty
A Big Daddy Elvis blurb
Note: Somehow it would seem that I have managed to write a blurb for the first time ever, half baked and plotless though it be. I suppose I was missing Big Daddy E a bit too much while working on other projects. And I have given him a newborn because in my worlds we have nice things
Summary and Warnings (Spoilers:) middle of the night nursing and cockwarming and dirty baby talk. yep, that’s what I wrote
Insomnia is no foreigner to Elvis, and while pulling awake in the dead of night he is accustomed to the verve of Las Vegas vibrating it’s way up to the penthouse, tonight he can’t even blame his startlement on the cacophony of cicadas who have found a home in the trees around Graceland.
Tonight the gentle sound that reaches his ears makes him question how on earth his life got to be so sweet, and since when did the gulping noises of his child feeding off you become simultaneously so comforting and erotic. He lays on his back for a few moments, calibrating his eyes to the dark and once he’s certain they’ve adjusted, and that no hope remains for him to fall asleep, he slowly turns and slots himself behind you like the big ole spoon you refer to him as.
Sweeter still than any noise yet, is your pleased little hum of surprise at the sudden contact. The heat of his chest and swell of his belly presses into your back, and he knows you’re happy to have his company, it’s the one thing he’s never in doubt of anymore, your little trio is a mutually adoring fan club.
He and his little peanut might jinx sleep intentionally just for these little moonlit moments.
Elvis can only speak for himself, but when the contented little mewls and the slurping gulps of his infant reach him, he becomes so desperately needy for the same closeness as you and the baby are sharing that his heart pumps more vigorously than it has in years, and while the baby takes from you, he gives.
Returning “cream for cream”, you had joked in a more lucid moment.
With another woman he might have been ashamed, but with you he presses closer, hooks his chin over your shoulder and delights in how you shiver from the tickle of his sideburns against your neck.
“Hi there, daddy, I see you’ve joined us.” you mumble teasingly through your fatigue, suddenly feeling less worn down now he’s turned to you, his strong embrace letting you give into the lethargic haze of a predawn breast feeding since you know he will watch out for all three of you.
“Thought I was sleepin through a beer guzzlin’ contest.” he jokes, reaching a hand over you to poke your baby’s fat cheeks as they don’t even hollow despite the constant sucking, “Heavens honey, you’d think you threatened to take your jugs away from her she’s so frantic.”
“Make yourself useful daddy, calm her down then.” you grin into your pillow, feeling him poking you from behind and knowing you’re gonna get more from this interlude than empty teats.
“Gonna have to get close then, mama.” he reminds you as if this were a clause in the contract you hadn’t considered.
“Whatever’s necessary.” you concede.
It’s a funny thing how you can think you’re close to him until he chooses to truly close the distance. Your man has an ability to shape himself into every dip of you and swallow you whole with his bulk in so heady a way that at one time you would not have anticipated it to have such an effect on you. It makes you moan as the damp heat of him scorches through the thin cotton of your gown and he doesn’t even think to ask as he lifts your thigh in his large hand, reaches below his belly, then he slides himself between your thighs, his height giving him the advantage of still being able to see over your shoulder. The puffy head of him nudges at your clit and the firm chub of him pressing against your heat makes you slump back into his broad chest. You can feel his answering grin against your cheek.
“She can’t settle cause her mama’s all pent up.” he diagnoses the situation before beginning a easy slide through your slick.
You let out a low moan above your baby’s head as you feel your previously unnoticed tension seep into the sheets along with your slick. You wiggle him deeper between your lips and shudder from how ready you already are.
“C’mon lil darlin” he coos, all moist and huffy against your cheek, “take it easy now, ain’t no one goin back to Nod till they’re all full and satisfied.”
He has a nasty habit of this, talking to both his babies at once, and you know he likes the plausible deniability of it, the way you can’t be sure if it’s wholesome or filthy.
He’s a furnace behind you, delighting in the way you are so plaint and giving for him, your thighs rippling with his gentle thrusts and a single ripe breast hanging out to feed the baby tucked next to you. It’s a marvel to him the way you grew his little seed and how you nourish it now, always giving, that’s what you are. Except for right now, nearly drugged you're so tired, your hips start to chase his greedily, all the feelings mounting in a slow but inevitable delight, fueled by his even grind and the baby’s suction.
“Daddy, daddy I need you in me.” you beg, your chest heaving with your breaths and this is backfiring, you’re starting to get worked up and he doesn’t want that, needs to grind you into oblivion.
“Shh, shh, don’t startle my baby.” he takes the calming hand from the baby’s fuzzy little head drags his knuckles over your cheek while angling his hips to truly torture you clit.
“Oh god.” you gasp out and you can feel the dribble of your interest coming from your clenching hole, burning painful in its emptiness. “I’m so tired daddy.” you fuss, knowing he’ll relent, he’s too appreciative of all your sleepless hours dedicated to the little nugget to frustrate you further.
“I’d better give ya your pacifier then, hmm?” he rumbles amused and you would like to swat him for being a menace but your hand is occupied cradling the baby’s head and he is taking mercy anyway -finally.
Joining with him is a slow, burning stretch that has you nearly faint from stratification, all the familiar sensations of him drowning you and soothing you all at once, the friction of his uncut head nudging past, each graduating inch of girth, finally the hairy little pooch of his lower belly snug against your smooth cheeks.
You settle finally, all is right with the world and Elvis groans so loudly in satisfaction at being inside you that the rest of the house must surely hear him. Baby is unperturbed, she’s used to the way her papa worships her mama in these early hours. Ever since that first time after you’d gotten her home, barely healed up when Elvis started clutching and prodding between you thighs with shamefaced desperation, whispering hoarsely into the darkness:
“Jus wanna be close mama, wanna be close with my widdle girls, Peanut’s goin at it ain’t she? Can barely hold her eyes open but she chuggin it down. Jus, just let me in mama, that’s it, just wanna be close, oh goddamn you are snug as anythin.”
#big daddy elvis fanfiction#to think when I first wrote that tag on a fic#it was all on its own#now look at the tag it doth flourish#Elvis fanfiction#mine#crawfever#70s elvis#elvis presley#elvis x reader#Elvis imagine
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Caught in a Trap
This has been a WIP since…. January? It predates my Tumblr anyhow - the concept is, uh, ridiculous, a cheesy rom-comesque situation. But for some reason, I just love having pretend arguments with Elvis - it’s honestly one of my go-to scenarios. Then, this prompt came along and I thought, huh, I’m pretty sure this would work with this, so I dug it out from the depths of my files and here we are xx
prompt fill: “How are we going to solve this problem?”
pairing: Elvis (1961/2) / fem!Reader
warnings: 18+, kind of manipulative!elvis, accusations of cheating, fake date, kissing, the suggestion of oral sex… but nothing actually pictured (honestly …. this is because i feel like all i’ve done recently is write the exact same description of it …. so if anyone wants to send me those time machine instructions so i can get some more inspo that would be *great*) . fictional member of the entourage as like a billy-esque person, but just a teeny bit older. Jerry hanging around when he may not have been - i’m envisioning he just popped over for something rather than working for e in this one but that may just be bc i wrote him into it and need an excuse for him to be there.
summary: essentially an alternative, younger, take of the older, sexier ‘We can’t go on together’ - Confronting Elvis about his casual kissing and the aftermath of being told ‘sure, its fine if you want to find someone else to take you out’ - spoiler…. It’s not fine.
wc: 4.4k
as always for the dolls @whositmcwhatsit @vintageshanny @thatbanditqueen @ellie-24 @from-memphis-with-love @missmaywemeetagain
It’s difficult, having these conversations with him, they somehow always turn accusing - both of you slinging accusations at one another. But you can’t keep watching him go on as he is, can’t keep watching from the sidelines where he’s ensconced you between the walls of Graceland. It’s painful at best, humiliating at worst, watching him with his hands on the necks of other girls, kissing their cheeks - or god forbid their lips at the gates, in the car. Wherever he happens to be. He’s always liked girls, chased after them ever since he was old enough to want to and he didn’t often see much harm in chasing now either. Maybe you would see less harm yourself, in his careless affection for his fans, if you felt like he was putting in enough effort to you - that you weren’t just being taken advantage of. But as much as you struggle through, logically knowing he loves you, it doesn’t really feel like it at the moment. It comes to a head one evening when he stalks through the front door, furious that you’d leapt from the car and stormed up to the house when he was “just talking! I was just talkin’ to her! What did you want me to do!”
You’d awkwardly stood there in the foyer, chest heaving with your emotions but uncertain what was best to say, when he’d continued his rant;
“Oh naw, C’mon now, you wanna have it out, let’s have it out. C’mon, what’s the problem?” You sigh,
“Noth-” He huffs at you, crossing his arms, his reddish-brown suit crinkling with the motion, as if telling you he knows that’s a lie. “Ok, fine. I don’t see why you always gotta let ‘em be all over you.” That’s barely the half of it, but no good ever comes from these arguments with him.
“They’ve been waiting out there for hours, it’s the least I could do!” He shakes his head, “No, this has gotta be more than just some lil jealous thing, so go on - what’s wrong, I’ve not been treatin’ you enough?” You flinch as if you’ve been slapped, its a mean accusation and he knows it; the implication that’s all you’re there for, as if you hadn’t been there before; hadn’t waited with barely a phone call a week for two years for him to come home. Despite your best efforts you can feel your eyes filling with tears, though you attempt to furiously blink them away, knowing he hates it. He sighs, “Nah, I’m sorry baby, that wasn’t, that wasn’t fair, what is it?” He grabs your arm, slinking around so that he’s cupping you against his chest, “C’mon no need for that, what is it botherin’ you?” It’s almost comical, the degree to which he is in denial about his own affinity for being the problem, but you’ve already had enough of the discussion and just want it to be over now. So you clutch at straws, mind grabbing the first thing that he might find as an acceptable reason for your poor mood;
“Elvie - Baby, I just, I never get to go out anymore.” He huffs again, pulling back a little so he can look down at you, he rolls his eyes, as if he’s about to disagree before he looks to the side, deflating a little.
“No, you’re right. It’s not fair to you - pretty young dolls should be taken out every night of the damn week,” You frown, you’re barely two years younger than he is, “but baby, I gotta, gotta work, I’m just so goddamn busy at the moment sweetheart, I can’t just, I just don’t have the time.” You pout at him, understanding but still unhappy. He pulls you around to sit down, sitting beside you, your thighs touching.
It hadn’t been a total lie; you weren’t happy about the evenings sat waiting at home, just hoping tonight would be the night he shows up when he said he would. He stares out the window a moment, clearly thinking. He meets your eyes, holding your gaze for so long that you feel like you have to look away before saying, “Well gee honey,” his tone full of faux nonchalance, “maybe, uh, maybe you can go on dates if you wanna. Find someone to take you out when I can’t. Just…just as long as you’re being good on ‘em. Real good, mama, you hear me?” You’re a little confused what’s being proposed but you hurriedly nod all the same, “I don’t wanna hear about your mouth bein’ places it shouldn’t.” You’re quick to agree,
“Of course, it’s more, I just want the company El, I still don’t have many girlfriends here in Memphis now, but I don’t wanna be kissing anyone but you.” He pats your leg, nodding almost magnanimously, clearly pleased at his generosity of the suggestion,
“Well then sure, honey, go and have fun. Actually, that’ll solve my problem with the Colonel too.”
So with that permission, when two weeks later one of the boys - Tommy, approached you and asked timidly if you wanted to go out with him that night, “I-uh know you’re with Elvis, but I know you have a, uh, agreement of sorts, and I’d uh love to spend the evening with you doll.” You had gladly agreed. Elvis wasn’t even going to be home, and he had said you could go out; who better than one of his boys?
You’re surprised, in the late evening, how good of a time you’re having, even as you can’t help but compare; Elvis would have opened that door for you. Elvis would have had a bouquet in his hand, if not something more extravagant. Elvis would have sat on the same side of the table as you. Elvis wouldn’t have flinched away when your elbows touched. Still, for being with someone who wasn’t Elvis you were having a nice enough time and it was fun to spend some time acting your age again. Being normal. It wasn’t necessarily something you’d want to do super often but both you and Tommy were aware your heart was elsewhere and so you didn’t have to worry about letting him down, and he made sure you were both still having a good time. It was honestly just nice to be out, and not accosted while doing so. You’re sucking up the last of your milkshake, well aware the date is going nowhere and therefore not ashamed to noisily suck up the dregs, the loud noise making Tommy chuckle.
“You know doll - when EP suggested this I thought he’d gone insane, but I’ve had a good time tonight.” The pet name flowed off of his tongue as easily as it seemed to in all of Elvis’ southern entourage but you can’t help but wince internally a tiny bit at his usage. However, you’re immediately distracted by the rest of his sentence, the last of the milkshake turning to what felt like pure ice running through your throat to your tummy,
“Sorry, did you just say… Elvis suggested this?” Tommy suddenly looks a little bashful, eyes wide,
“Uh - yeah, I thought…he said he thought the press would stop hounding you so much if uh - you looked unattached from him? Said people were starting to guess you were uhhh goin’ steady stead of just seein’ him. So he told me to take you out - dinner and a movie, make sure we were seen and uhhh…. told me I could do whatever you asked….you know keepin’ up ‘ppearances but to keep my hands to myself.” You’re stunned, and feel so, so very stupid. You’d honestly thought he liked you, at the very least as a friend, and while you had had no intention of it being anything but an evening that might make Elvis jealous you still had liked the attention.
“…sorry, are you saying that you were paid to go on this date with me?”
“Uhhh look, I thought you knew! I thought it was a joint thing, and I uh wasn’t paid anything more than I norm-lly would for an evening’s work. Ain’t like I took much persuadin’ - you’re a pretty girl!” Well there was that at least. “I didn’t meanta offend ya or anythin.” he sounds sincere, and while you’re still shaken by this revelation your brain is running through scenarios that may make the evening still worthwhile. You smooth your features, and smile up at him glancing at him under your eyelashes
“Well-there’s one way you can make it up to me.” It’s like he can tell where your mind has gone and he looks sideways nervously,
“Uh, well see here though doll, Elvis… he’ll kill me. He’ll kill me dead.” You let out a little, fake, giggle.
“Oh no it’s just a game - he’s just foolin with you, the silly goose.” You worry you might be laying it on a bit thick but he definitely is starting to relax. “Look, I uh, don’t think he’d be thrilled to see anything in the papers but look, if you let Jerry catch us in the caddy; I’ll double whatever Elvis was gonna pay you…” He still looks uncertain, and you panic for a second before you get a sudden flash of inspiration - “And I’ll make sure he doesn’t go mad at you.” He still looks worried but is clearly on the fence, “… and I’ll put in a good word with Jackie for you.” His face lights up. Jackpot.
It’s awkward as you drive back, both of you preparing for it, he clearly wants to know why on earth you seem to have lost your mind but is evidently too afraid to ask. And you’re spending the time wondering the exact same thing, but, at the end of the day… Elvis can only be so mad, right? He does basically the same thing all the time. When he pulls into the spot designated for the car, you turn to him - there needs to be ground rules.
“Ok. Hands above my waist. At all times.” He nods, eyes wide, “Ok, ok this’ll be fine. Just a kiss - a regular kiss, no tongue or anything.” He nods again, rapidly, like the fear is subsiding somewhat and he can’t quite believe his luck.
You don’t have to wait long, you’d timed it almost perfectly for when you knew Jerry would be heading out to meet his current girl. You can see him stand there and put his hand up to his forehead, attempting to block your headlights which you’d ‘accidentally’ bumped on when he started to walk up.“Ok,” You look over at Tommy, inching across the seat, “Ok, quick before he goes,” You don’t allow it to go on for very long, but certainly long enough and it’s only shortly after when you pull away, acting as if you were in a daze; quickly flicking off the lights and killing the power entirely. When you glance up again, Jerry’s gone.
‘Shit.’ You think, feeling uneasy all of a sudden. It was one thing to give a performative kiss, for a reason - to a fan begging for it, but quite another to have potentially done so without an audience. It makes you feel strangely guilty about the whole evening. You thank Tommy again, making it clear it’s time for him to leave; he gets out when you do and starts to heads towards the house but before he’s taken three steps you’re calling back to him, “Uh Tommy, just in case - unless he sends for you, I’d probably lay low until I have a chance to speak to him.” He looks back at you and nods. Despite your assurances (and his clear desire to go out with Jackie) you can tell he was still apprehensive about facing Elvis. He changes the direction he was heading in, instead heading for the back entrance - clearly about to go and find some of the other boys to hang out with - or maybe bum a lift home from one of them, while you get out of your car, smooth your dress and hair and head for the front door.
You walk in, expecting pretty much a party since it was the right time of night for that to be happening and hear nothing but Elvis at the piano; your stomach plummets, it’s rare he’s home at this time, and even rarer that he’s clearly alone - you feel even guiltier about what you’ve done. He’d clearly wanted you to have him to come home to, no doubt knowing you’d choose him over anyone. You head straight for the music room tucked in the corner of the foyer and see him sat there, mindlessly playing humming along but looking out the window.
“Hi Honey,” You go to greet him with a kiss, but he turns to face you and you realise you’ve severely miscalculated;
“Hi Honey” he mocks you in a high pitched tone, it deepens as he continues to stare directly at you, “Jerry just called me from the car. He had some mighty interestin’ gossip to tell me.” He pats the bench “why dontcha sit down and let me share it with you.” You look around nervously but he really has cleared the place out and there’s no one to excuse yourself with, nor can you think of any good reason to refuse him, so you do as he demands. You hope Tommy had headed back out himself. You try to keep your face expressionless forcibly relaxing your jaw, anxious not to let Elvis know you’re worried; how’re you the one who’s feeling so nervous? Although you’d expected some reaction you hadn’t expected to have to face up to the consequences so soon. Despite everything telling you not to, you sit close to him, thighs touching. You’d normally hook an ankle around his, but that’s a step too far today. His fingers play a little tune while you wait for him to talk.
“You steppin’ out on me baby?” His tone is level, in a way that says his anger has gone past hot temper and straight into cold fury. If he wasn’t so enraged you might find him amusing, sounding a bit like a petulant little boy pretending to be a man. You look over at him, suddenly furious that he, who orchestrated this whole evening, might take offence that you took part in it.
“If I was it’s because you arranged it.” He hits a flat note.
“Because you asked me to.” He’s got an edge of a condescending tone about him, and he talks slowly, like he’s spelling something out for you. “You told me I never take you out anymore and you’d find someone who would. I found someone for you. Thought you’d be happy.” He shrugs.
“So….what exactly is the problem here then?” Your tone is less than polite, but you had expected him to rage at you and his opposite reaction has unnerved you. You go to stand up, exhausted already at the argument that he appears to be ready to have again. It wasn’t how you’d expected this to go - you thought he’d apologise, make up, move on; although you should know by now that he rarely, if ever, apologises for anything. As you round the corner by him, his hand whips out and he grabs your wrist,
“I ain’t done talking to you yet little girl.” You have no choice but to pause where you are,
“I don’t see what’s left to talk about - I did what I said I was going to do, and you arranged it. Did you want me to say thank you? Thank you for insulting me like that?”
He looks over at you and he’s talking fast, lowly like he wants to get his point across as quickly as possible. His head dipping to look up at you from under his eyelashes, his hand that wasn’t clutching you gesturing with his speech;
“N-ow baby, I didn’t have an issue with you bein’ taken out, you’re right I probably don’t spend enough time treatin’ you to all that … although I think you get enough treats. But….Jerry’s just told me there was somethin’ else goin’ on. That’s different from bein’ taken out to dinner baby,” his eyes flash, and he looks you dead in your own, and despite how awkward you feel you can’t look away, his accent growing stronger as his emotions get the better of him; “that’s you steppin out o’line, steppin’ out on me. How are we gonna solve this problem?”
He’s still got a hold of your wrist and he’s holding onto it so tightly, you’re positive it’ll bruise if he holds on much longer. His eyes are burning as he looks over at you, and you can’t help but let yours fill with tears. He shakes his head and wiggles your arm,
“No. Darlin’ don’t you start with them crocodile tears until we got this all straightened out.” He tugs you to stand in front of him as he swivels to sit sideways on the bench. As you try to swallow your tears indignation rises within you;
“You’re not being fair. You step out on me all the damn time El. Lord above, I’m surprised if you’re not out more than you’re in.” He frowns, “and more than that, you arranged it all tonight! manoeuvred me about just how you wanted! How did you expect me to react Elvis? Of course I wanted to get back at you. Give you a little taste of how I feel all the goddamn time.”
“Baby,” His tone as if he’s talking to a child, “I’ve told you before - it’s different for me I’ve -“
‘I swear to god E, if you say you’ve got needs one more fucking time, we’re through and I really mean it this time.” He sucks in a breath, like despite all he’s done he didn’t expect the ultimatum, and usually you’d expect it to annoy him further - for him to tell you fine, go then. But he doesn’t, instead he looks down, suddenly forlorn as if you’ve knocked the wind from his sails.
“I don’t know what you want me to say doll, I can’t bear the thought of you with someone else.” He’s still looking down, at your feet, like a little boy being told off. You hate how it immediately endears him to you again, how you’re immediately thinking of ways you could make him feel better.
“Well why should I have to bear it with you?”
He looks sideways, “It’s ju-just,” he’s clearly nervous and he stutters through the next, “baby I have spoken to the Colonel ‘bout all this, d-d- don’t think I haven’t, he just ain’t keen on me having a girl at the moment. I don’t see how you can come with me everywhere and it not be clear we’re together.” You shake your arm where it’s still in his grip, forcing him to look at you.
“Well El- are we together? Because there’s puttin’ on a show for whatever reason and then there’s sneakin’ girls back when no-ones looking.” Your own accent is coming out stronger as you get louder.
“There ain’t no other girls darling,” he sighs, “I dunno how many times I’ve gotta tell you that.”
“That’s just not true, if it was we wouldn’t be having this conversation in the first place.” He shakes his head, hair starting to come out of its coiffed position with the force of it,
“I swear baby you’re the only girl for me.” You nod, and step forward to put your hands on either side of his face. He leans into them, eyelashes fluttering unconsciously.
“I know you think that when I’m here, but what about when I’m not?”
“I-I don’t know how you’re turning this onto me doll, when you’re the one kissin’ someone else tonight. I’ve been here on my lonesome waiting for you to come home.” You laugh, squeezing his cheeks causing his lips to pucker as he talks,
“Elvis. That’s my life every night.” He frowns.
“Darling, they don’t mean nothing though! I swear it’s just for show! I haven’t had another girl in any way that matters since I met you baby.” You frown back at him, that wasn’t what you’d heard, and ‘not in any way that matters’ doesn’t mean not at all but his earnest expression, with his eyes wide, seems desperate for you to believe him. “Please baby, you hafta believe me.” He pleads, and you can feel yourself slipping,
“Hmmm. Well….if you say so.” You shrug, about to pull away to take a breath and attempt to regain your thoughts without his eyes imploring you. He stands, wrapping his arms around your midriff, with a little wiggle before you can get any further away. A hand travels up to your neck, almost feeling like he’s scruffing you, but his thumb rubs over a pressure point and you can feel the tension in your shoulders ease with each gentle stroke of his finger.
“I swear, mama.” You look up at him, his lips parted - blue eyes earnest, for once not clouded by eyeliner or make-up, “I swear, I- I uh like the attention but I mean I’m a hot blooded man, I can’t turn that off baby, and if a girl’s gonna throw herself at me, I’m not gonna shove her away.” You frown, you’d been about to cave in to anything he said, but you’re hesitant again now - unsure what you’d be agreeing to if not, essentially, giving him permission to do whatever the hell he likes. His hand grips your hip tighter, as if he can sense he’s losing you. “No, c’mon baby, you know it makes sense - it’s, it don’t mean nothing, I swear it, I swear it on, on,” He looks around desperate for divine inspiration, “On my Mama’s grave I swear - you’re my girl.” You’re taken aback by that, it wasn’t something you’d ever heard him say before and Gladys’ name wasn’t ever brought up in any kind of jest. You can’t help but totally believe him. You duck your head, hating yourself a little for making him swear such a promise,
“Oh no, Elvis, I only kissed him to get back at you - make you jealous.” He tucks your head against him, holding you close and shushes you,
“I know sweet, I know. Bet he wasn’t even a good kisser was he? He’s just a boy, ain’t a man like you need.” You shake your head against his chest groaning a little at what you’re about to confess, playing in to his little pissing competition.
“No…wasn’t good at all. Hadda….had to lead.” Elvis laughs,
“Oh no, sweet little thing like you shouldn’t hafta be in charge. You oughta be taken care of.” He tips your head back and brushes your tears away with his thumbs. “No more tears mama,” and he kisses you, gently - twice on the mouth before moving to the side of your face. Butterfly kisses, before leading you by the hand over to the sofa, “Lemme take care of ya, doll.”
He sits, legs parted and his hands grip your hips holding you in place before dragging you closer, it forces you to look down at him. Simultaneously making you feel a little small, and a little like a child, you thread your fingers through his hair, weaving the strands, stiff with gel and spray past your knuckles to tilt his head up. He smiles up at you, a little private half-smile, his eyes crinkling and you’re helpless to anything except leaning down to press a kiss against it. He takes the opportunity of the momentum of your leaning down to tug you onto his lap. Breaking your hold on his hair, and the touch of your lips on his. He takes a moment to situate you, tugging with a hand under your thigh to pull you ever closer to him. Once you’re firmly tucked against his side his other hand travels up your back to support your head, as if you needed it, gripping your neck, the other a heavy presence on your thigh. You shift, helplessly trapped by his hold on you - as if you’d even want to get away, unable to do anything but melt against his chest.
You glance about, sure that the silence and solitude you had found him in was soon to be broken, and nervous about going any further if there was a threat of being interrupted.
“Nah, baby, no-one’s around,” He leans forward, kissing your neck, “Let - “ he moves closer, to your cheek, murmuring against your skin, “me, make it up to you.” He whispered right against your lips. You sink into him completely, lips parting of their own accord, and he delves into them. It’s perfect, despite the slightly awkward angle, and you can’t help but sigh a little breath of relief at the feeling of it, so different from the gentle, chaste kiss in the car. Utterly perfect with his sharp nippy little teeth and darting tongue. He pulls you back, shifting you back but lower, until you’re pretty much horizontal on the sofa, pulling his hand out from under your neck to lay you down completely. He shifts, tumbling off, onto his knees.
He pulls you around with a grip on your thighs before positioning you exactly how he wants, on your back, with your feet planted firmly down, legs spread. He tugs you closer to him, so that you’re almost coming off the couch yourself, pushing your legs apart further so that he could kneel between them. You aren’t sure about this. Not in, essentially, the very first room of the house - not, right by the front door.
“C’mon I’ll make you feel good doll, and then, then I’ll take ya upstairs and you can apologise real pretty to me too.” You frown, about to protest - to suggest, ‘hey how about we go straight upstairs now?’ when all thoughts are gone from your mind as he pushes your already bunched up dress further up and leans in, his breath hot against your panties. He’s … very good at this, and you’re under no illusions that by the time he’s half carrying you on wobbly legs up the stairs that you’ll have completely forgotten about any of those other girls, and by the time he’s placing you on your knees in front of him in the bedroom, that you’ll have totally forgiven him for any future transgressions as well.
#writing prompt game#60s elvis x reader#elvis presley x you#elvis x reader#elvis fanfic#elvis smut is probably a bit too far for what’s in this#so idk#light elvis smut#be-my-ally
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tell meee about Graceland too
OH MY GOD okay so first of all here's the edit that made me weep (x)
explanation under the cut for mild wad spoilers
'graceland too' by phoebe bridgers is about her bandmate julien baker when julien was in a really really bad place, struggling with addiction and was incredible depressed, but then she got to see julien slowly fighting her way back to life and happiness ‘graceland too’ about loving a friend who’s been through hard things and how it’s so painful to see but then you see them getting better.
So we spent what was left of our serotonin To chew on our cheeks and stare at the moon Said she knows she lived through it to get to this moment Ate a sleeve of saltines on my floor, and I knew then
I would do anything you want me to I would do anything for you I would do anything, I would do anything Whatever you want me to do, I will do
Whatever she wants, whatever she wants Whatever she wants (whatever you want)
like seeing someone you love so dearly thrive and say they're finally happy they're still here and being so overcome with joy that you repeat 'i will do anything for you, whatever you want'.
so then you have dan literally sitting on a staircase saying he made it and he's glad he made it while this massive audience of people who adore him cheer him because despite seeing only a fraction of his private struggle, we would truly do anything for him. just...FUCK!!! you know!!!!
#sorry this isn't the most eloquent i just can't even explain in words what it means#the most dan song
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some observations of priscilla, bc the people I went to see it with are not the type to enjoy analyzing media and I have thoughts
also this is just me venting on my phone so these are very undeveloped thoughts idk
*contains mild spoilers*
the style is so lovely, if there's one thing sofia can do it's curate a damn atmosphere. i haven't seen marie antoinette in a while but sofia works with environments like another character in the movie, and it's so effective in pulling you into the experience.
you feel that boredom and monotony and confinement so vividly - you basically don't see priscilla outside of graceland between her arriving and elvis leaving the last time, and you almost don't realize it. and you become so familiar with the rooms and the space, it's depression when you don't leave your house for months and see the same things over and over and feel like a doll being moved around a little dollhouse just being picked up and put down in situations.
the shot when elvis is leaving the last time and priscilla's being left behind but her world is getting bigger??
this portrayal of elvis is so interesting - he's a character, the whole time, and you get these glimpses of what he really thinks or feels. he's pulling at her strings just to see what happens, just to experiment with the reactions. it's like he just wants to see that his actions can have actual effects on people, to prove that priscilla is 3d and not the paper people he sees on stage. or again, like priscilla is just his doll to put into situations.
also, I don't know enough about the psychology or realities of grooming and abuse to really get into it, but the relationship with sex is so... like she's an image of purity to him, to the point of being undesirable. too pure to desire. it's that groomer mindset of priscilla being something he has to "protect," like his child almost, but also to have control over her actions and to keep her in the box he's put her in.
and 6'5" jacob elordi next to 5'1" cailee spaeny in a movie about a grown celebrity grooming and claiming a 14 year old girl?
the scene of priscilla trying on clothes for elvis and the group of guys was SO profound to me - the discomfort of it, but also the gratification of male approval and attention? the little smile in the end when they like the outfit - that's such a familiar feeling to me, being deeply uncomfortable on display for men but still having that goblin inside of you that's fed with their attraction to you. especially at that age, god. same with her graduation - she's their little mascot, the pet project. and she doesn't have any friends, so she performs for them, for their applause and approval
and the omnipresence of elvis's gang and complete absence of female friends for her. he's putting on a show, always, and she's supposed to put on that show with him. and then behind closed doors, she's not putting on the show anymore but he still wants the priscilla on stage. and she is NEVER without makeup in front of him, especially after he tells her to wear more eyeliner. always picture perfect. uggh I could see this movie fifteen times. the moment of quiet in chaos as she puts on her eyelashes before giving birth? it's so poignant, that even in labor she's putting on a show for him and the world but taking pride and peace in the art of it. that was one of my favorite scenes honestly
cailee's performance was just incredible. so delicate and nuanced and honest and I hope we get to see her again and again.
NOT EVEN TO MENTION the fashion and styling, my god. stunning. it's iconic and beautiful and tells the whole story within itself.
anyway if anyone wants to discuss this movie with me please I'm desperate
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I Saw Priscilla so You Don't Have To: A Review
Before I begin, I should say a few things.
First, there will definitely be spoilers for Priscilla (2023). I'll try not to give too much away, but instead, do so in a way to add context. Second, I am not a Priscilla hater, but I'm not a stan, either. I can acknowledge that neither Elvis nor Priscilla were perfect, and that both made mistakes regarding their relationship. Finally, this is my opinion. I may reference other works, including Elvis (2022), but do not intend to tear one down in order to build up another. You are free to disagree with anything I say, all I ask is that you do so respectfully and don't spread hate.
That being said, let's get into the review!
The first thing I should note is that even if you didn't know who the director was, you'd still be able to tell it was a Sofia Coppola picture. Much like with Baz Luhrmann's Elvis (2022), there's a strong emphasis on the visual aesthetic of this world. Through Sofia's lens, the realm of Graceland feels more grounded and feminine. It honestly ticks all the boxes of a Sofia Coppola film, including regularly utilized elements such as:
The female protagonist/feminine perspective
A coming of age
Visual montage
Prominent soundtrack
The ups and downs of relationships
While the story arc revolves around Priscilla maturing into adulthood, the pacing felt a bit unbalanced for me. For the first half of the film, she's a teenager, and the following decade is briskly told through the last hour. The script tends to focus on the more intimate moments between her and Elvis, so several several major events happen in just a few shots (ex. the wedding, Lisa Marie's birth, Priscilla and Mike Stone, etc.) I get that not everything from Priscilla's book would be present in the film, but I feel like a greater balance could have been exercised.
Next, I should talk about the casting. I feel like Cailee Spaeny did a fine job as Priscilla. Even though she's the main character, I don't feel like I have much else to say about her beyond the fact that she's able to convey Priscilla's growth over the decade and a half span.
Now let's talk about Jacob Elordi.
While he's definitely a different Elvis from Austin Butler's interpretation, I didn't hate Elordi as much as I initially though I would. Since most of the scenes follow Elvis and Priscilla's day-to-day life as a couple, there are far fewer demands of Elordi's character than there are of Butler's. Despite the few flare-ups, his character feels very understated throughout the entire movie. One thing I should note is his constant mumbling; if you have auditory processing issues like me, you're definitely going to miss a few of his lines.
There's definitely been some controversy over how Elvis would be portrayed in this film, and I feel that, in that sense, the movie's going to play out a bit like Barbie, where what you anticipate from it is what you're going to get. For those going in believing the film will expose Elvis as an abusive p*do, then that's what they're going to take from it (even though they show several scenes where Elvis decides not to have sex with Priscilla before their marriage). For the people who have read Priscilla's book and are familiar with the story, it will feel a lot like her book. The main thing is that context is key. Since I'm already very familiar with the story and events, I found myself filling in the blanks in some places. I can only wonder how those going into this with no frame of reference will interpret the final result, especially since the movie ends so ambiguously (After telling Elvis that she wants a divorce, the final scene shows Priscilla saying goodbye to the women she was closest with at Graceland and driving through the gates while Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You" plays).
There are a few scenes that depict the darker side of Elvis, but the film was honestly tamer than I expected. Some of the scenes included are the pillow fight, him threatening to send her back to her parents, and the disagreement over his songs. While he loses his temper each time, he immediately apologizes after. The bible study scene shows a devastated Priscilla rush off to the bedroom, but dosen't show anything beyond that. The climax includes the infamous "r*pe" scene, but the action never goes beyond kissing. Overall, the content felt very tame considering the film's R rating (they honestly could have cut one of the two uses of "fuck" and slid with a PG-13 rating). I feel that this tameness is to allow the film to be more palatable to a general audience that may only have a base level of knowledge about Priscilla and Elvis. Elvis' use of baby-talk is heavily toned down, and the dialogue really pulls its weight when trying to provide context and add references.
There are a few things from the book that either I was expecting to be included, or had hoped would be present. While not pleasant, I was expecting "Kurt" to be present in some capacity (they most likely wouldn't show anything onscreen, but enough to get the point across). I talked about the bible scene already, but I expected them to go all the way (assuming the R rating wouldn't have been as tame as it was). I was hoping the interaction between Priscilla and Jerry would have been present, but this did not happen. In fact, all of the Memphis Mafia members almost feel like a faceless mass, like none of them have distinctive identities (I did enjoy the instances of them horsing around and being dumbasses together). The Circle G Ranch is never mentioned, which I found odd, considering in her book, Priscilla talked a lot about their experiences on the ranch after the marriage, and how she enjoyed it so much (I would have at least enjoyed the lasagna scene). The main thing that bothered me was the under-utilization of Dodger (or whoever that generic southern grandma was, because she sure wasn't Dodger). While Priscilla also develops bonds with Patsy, Alberta, and the other wives (if Joanie and Sandy hadn't been named, I wouldn't have realized they were even in this movie), More could've been done with Dodger. In the book, Dodger plays a bigger role in Priscilla's time at Graceland, acting as a grandmother figure and providing context about Elvis. Overall, I would have liked to have seen Priscilla develop closer bonds to the women of Graceland, but there's only so much that can be explored in a limited amount of time.
I will note a few things I did enjoy. Like I said earlier, the visual aesthetic is strong, but one thing I particularly enjoyed were the home movie scenes. The frame was squared, the edges were fuzzy, and it really gave that intimate feel of discovering some lost home movies. I also enjoyed some little details present (Elvis' reading glasses make an appearance!), but these moments feel few and far between.
Overall, I feel like one's own frame of reference and attitudes towards the subjects will heavily influence how one views this movie. Everyone will have something different to say about it, and that's perfectly fine.
#priscilla movie#priscilla 2023#priscilla presley#elvis presley#elvis and priscilla#I can't believe I spent over an hour and a half writing this
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‘Just Like A Woman’
Summary: A Las Vegas showgirl falls in love with a heartbroken Elvis Presley. He is unwilling (or unable) to love her back.
Warnings: angst, alcohol consumption, will eventually be nsfw, Priscilla doesn’t exist in this timeline.
Word count: 3k
Author’s notes: This idea came to me after reading the wonderful @missmaywemeetagain’s Pink Scarf series. Elvis and Reader were made for each other, and my brain went (spoilers sweetie) what if they didn’t end up together? What if Elvis had a love of his life that didn’t work out? He would be a completely broken man. Enter my little Vegas showgirl. This was going to be a one-shot, but I was itching to put out something new, so it will now be a 2 or 3 parter. Thanks to my Lovely Ladies of Graceland for the input, encouragement and love.
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Las Vegas - August 1970
The door to your apartment slams and you cringe. Damn. You were hoping to be ready and gone before your roommate, Jane, got home. You sigh a little and continue applying your mascara carefully.
“Yoo-hoo, anybody home?” You hear her call out before answering with a “Yoo-hoo, in here!” of your own, steeling yourself for the inevitable barrage. She peeks around your door, her face bright and open, before observing your actions. Her face darkens a smidge but she keeps her tone light, “Where ya goin?” You hesitate a moment before answering, momentarily disappointed that you hadn’t come up with a better excuse, just in case.
“Just out,” you say, cursing yourself for sounding cagey. You are, and she knows it. She latches onto your tentative, vague answer and crosses her arms, looking surprisingly like your mother in this moment.
“Out,” she says pointedly, a statement.
“Mm hmm,” you hum, unwilling to take the bait. You don’t feel up for a fight, not tonight. You’re exhausted, it’s your one day off and you just want to live your life in peace, her distaste in your decisions be damned.
“Tell me again just why you think it’s a good idea to see Elvis tonight? Or any night?” She throws her hands up and the tone in her voice is one of disappointment and slight desperation. This argument is an old one, and you’re both tiring of it. You sigh, catching her eye in the mirror and put down the mascara wand in your hand.
“Jane,” you say pleadingly, “please. Please don’t start. I can’t do this tonight. I know how you feel about him, and I respect that. But…” you trail off, unable or unwilling to explain your reasons to her, again. Something in your face must stop the words that had been forming in her mouth, because she doesn’t say what you think she will. What she always says when you have this fight. She holds up her hands in surrender.
“OK. OK. I just….I just care about you, babe. And I…” she trails off.
“Don’t want to see me hurt,” you finish for her, your eyes still locked with hers in your bedroom mirror. “I know. Thank you,” you whisper. She sighs and shakes her head before turning and walking away, muttering to herself. You appreciate her concern, really you do. And if it was any other man she didn’t approve of, you might consider her words. But it isn’t any other man. It’s Elvis Presley. And his hold on you is so strong, so finite, you think even God himself couldn’t pull you away.
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A black sedan is waiting outside your apartment building, right on schedule. The sweltering, late summer Las Vegas heat hits you full blast as you make your way to the car, and you’re thankful you wore one of your skimpiest dresses as sweat starts to collect on your skin during the short walk from door to car. Elvis always likes this dress on you. Not that he’s ever said as much. No, he isn’t really one for compliments. Or observations. Not with you, anyway. But you’ve seen the way his eyes grow a little wider whenever he looks you up and down in this dress, the way his jaw clenches taking in your long tan legs and bare arms, the small piece of silky fabric that barely covers your torso and not much else. You know when you’ve excited a man, and Elvis is always excited to see you in this dress. Besides, you want to look nice for him tonight. You haven’t seen him in a couple of months, not since he flew you out to Los Angeles just because he was a little lonely. Your stomach turns at the memory, that trip hadn’t gone as you’d expected. But you push those thoughts, and hurt that goes along with them, down. You don’t want to focus on that right now. You get to see Elvis again, and that’s the most important thing. The closer you get to the International Hotel the more the butterflies in your stomach start to flutter. You try and tamp down your expectations but you can’t, your excitement gets the better of you.
Elvis always invites you to the opening night of any Las Vegas engagement he does and it gives you a certain thrill to see him onstage, in his element, doing what he does best. Sure, you could attend more performances if you wanted, he’d arrange it in a heartbeat. But as it is your showgirl schedule at the Stardust keeps you busy, and when you’re not working, you’re with Elvis. And you’d rather be with him than watch him from afar. So it makes tonight a little special that you get to be in the audience, to take in the whole truth of him, to see him as he is meant to be seen. As the sedan rolls smoothly up to the entrance of the hotel, a valet hands you out of the car and onto the waiting arm of a member of the Memphis Mafia. This one is rather new, you’ve met him a couple of times but still don’t know him well. He’s young and kind of cute when he smiles at you, tucking your hand into the crook of his arm securely as he leads you into the hotel.
“Ready for the show, ma’am?” he drawls in an unmistakable southern accent, his hand moving to your back chastely as he guides you through the madness of the crowd. You swallow a giggle at being called ma’am and smile up at him, the excitement apparent on your face.
“Been looking forward to it all summer,” you say a little breathlessly. “I heard he’s added some new songs to the set?”
“Oh yes ma’am, you’re in for a treat tonight. The boss is fired up and ready to go.” You arrive at your designated seat, somewhere in the middle with a good view, and he holds onto your hand as you settle into the booth. “Do you have everything you need? I’ll be back after the show to take you upstairs.”
“You’re very kind. Thank you. Tell me your name again? I’m sorry, I’ve already forgotten it.”
“Alex, ma’am,” he says before nodding his head at you and disappearing into the crowd. You almost feel as if he should be tipping a cowboy hat in your direction, so southern and gentlemanly is he. These thoughts are interrupted by the showroom lights starting to dim and the heavy, gold curtain moving slowly upwards, revealing the massive stage. Your stomach drops and your heart beats a quick thrum in your chest. You shouldn’t be this excited to see him onstage again, not after what you and he get up to when you’re alone together, but you feel almost giddy, like a schoolgirl, at the prospect. Almost out of nowhere, Elvis saunters out of the wings and the audience goes absolutely wild. Women are yelling his name, already running past you towards the stage, eager to be as close to him as possible. The opening notes of “That’s All Right” start to thunderous applause and Elvis struts around the stage, a man on fire. He’s in top form tonight - witty, silly, energetic, engaging and sexy as hell. The truth you are unwilling to admit, even to yourself is - this is the Elvis you crave. The one you love. The one you want. But this is not the Elvis you have.
You push these thoughts to the back of your mind, along with every admonition Jane has ever given you. Elvis is back in town for a whole month, and you mean to make the most of your time together. With a little effort, you’re able to lose yourself in the music and the spectacle - laughing with the audience when he makes a joke or mouthing the words to “Viva Las Vegas.” A white hot flash of jealously sears through you when “Love Me Tender” starts, you know what’s about to happen and you feel a little sick at the prospect. Elvis begins making his way through the audience, kissing as many women as humanly possible as he does. You hold your breath as he gets closer and closer to your table. The crowd is a crush around him, reaching for him every step of the way and you put on your most dazzling smile, waiting for the sun to shine on you. Maybe he’ll kiss you this time, maybe he’ll treat you like one of the many nameless, faceless women he kisses every night. But he only glances at you as he passes, mild recognition dawning on his face too late, no love present in his glittering blue eyes. Bitter disappointment stings at your insides and you try and soothe yourself with the fact that you get him all to yourself tonight, in between shows and afterwards. The burning in your heart subsides a little, but a small, dull ache remains, a reminder that no matter how much you love Elvis Presley, he doesn’t - and can’t or won’t - love you back.
You really shouldn’t dwell on such thoughts, you knew what you signed up for. He’s holding up his end of the bargain and you’re trying like hell to hold up yours. You thought you could be one of those girls who just casually slept with someone and didn’t catch feelings. You desperately wanted to be one of those girls. It became apparent about 3.5 seconds after he first held you in his arms that you were a goner, well and truly lost. You should have walked out, right then and there, saved yourself a world of heartache. It must have been a cruel sort of fate that led you to a party at his penthouse one night, tagging along with friends, not expecting much. He’d just lost someone less than a week before. His true love, the love of his life, if whispered accounts by members of the mafia were to be believed. Oh, she wasn’t dead, but she was long gone. Gone from his life like she’d never even been there. Gone and left him a shell of a man, left you to pick up the pieces and put him back together again. You’d done a good job, as good a job as anyone could do when faced with an angry, bitter, devastated creature…not even a man, just a wounded animal lashing out at anyone who got too close.
He needed you, that much you could see in his eyes, plain as day. And if some small part of him needed you, maybe that wasn’t all bad. Maybe something could grow between the two of you - love, or something like it. Tonight all of these feelings come crashing down on your head, and it’s almost too much and you almost leave. But the promise of him holds you fast in your seat - the feel of his hard chest against your own bare one, the way his toned biceps flex and move under your hands, his soft, plush lips he uses anywhere on your body…anywhere except your mouth. It’s too intimate, he’s reasoned to you a dozen times, too painful, is what he really means. Too painful for him to kiss someone who isn’t her in his bed. It’s this thought, combined with the fact that you just saw him kiss two dozen women, all on the lips, that spurs you to order another drink. And another. Soon, you’re feeling very toasty, and more than a little giggly.
When Alex reappears at your side after the show, to take you upstairs, you’re more than a little wobbly on your feet, and he puts his arm around your waist to steady you.
“You ok, ma’am?” You see the concern in his eyes and wave him off.
“I’m fine…just fine. You’re sweet to worry, lost count of my drinks is all. I’m grand.” You giggle as you stumble a little and he catches you. “Take me to the boss man!”
He eyes you dubiously but helps you to the elevator and up to the penthouse suite, where he deposits you on the couch in Elvis’s room to wait for the man himself. Your head lolls back on the couch and the room is spinning and you really start to regret having so many drinks. You’re so out of it you don’t notice the door opening and closing quietly.
Los Angeles - 3 Months Ago
Elvis had called you in the middle of the night, the shrill ring of the telephone waking you from a dead sleep. It took you a minute to even register who was talking on the other end of the line, so excited and manic was their voice, their speech, talking a mile a minute.
“Elvis?” You’re still half asleep, groggy and unfocused, struggling to sit up in bed. “What’s wrong? Are you ok?” He didn’t usually call you, preferring instead to send telegrams or messages through his emissaries, so your heart was pounding with worry for a moment, before you finally grasped what he was saying.
“I need you…I-I-I need you in LA. Tomorrow. P-p-please darlin. I’m so lonely. I can’t sleep. I’m goin crazy out here…got some stuff I gotta be out here for and I just…I just can’t handle bein’ alone. Will ya come? Please?” He was practically begging you. He needed you.
You said yes, of course. One doesn’t say no to Elvis Presley. It wasn’t easy, arranging time off from work. You had to get several of the other girls to cover for you and in the end could only manage 4 days off. But he was happy enough to have you even for a couple of days, he said. He booked you first class on the first flight out the next morning and didn’t that make you feel special? Some random member of the mafia met you at the airport to pick you up, the first drop of disappointment landing coldly in your stomach despite the balmy California breeze. He had wanted you there so badly, had begged you to come…and he wasn’t even there to greet you? You convinced yourself you understood his reasoning on some level and pushed the feelings down, somewhere deep inside. You were in Los Angeles, you would have Elvis all to yourself for four whole days - nothing but sun and sex and sleep.
You could hardly wait as the car rolled to a stop before you were tugging the handle of the door open, practically flying out of the car and up the steps of Hillcrest House. You barely registered your beautiful surroundings, so excited to see Elvis you could barely stand it. It had only been three months since his last show in Vegas but that was three months too long for you.
“Elvis?” you called out, circling the living room, the kitchen, outside to the pool. It was almost a ghost town, the house so quiet and empty. Where the hell was he? Or any of his friends, at the very least?
“Miss?” someone said behind you and you jumped, turning around to see a kindly maid, holding out a telephone. “Mr. Presley is on the line for you.”
“Elvis? Where are you…I just got here and…” He cut you off, not even waiting for you to finish.
“Listen, honey, I’m sorry, I wanted to be there when you got in but the guys and I started talkin’ this morning and decided we felt like being in the snow today - we took the plane up north but don’t worry, I’ll be back by dinner. Just relax, make yourself at home and I’ll see you tonight, ok honey?”
The growing dread you’d felt ever since stepping off the plane was threatening to overwhelm you. But you swallowed your feelings, your disappointment, your hurt and cheerfully agreed to see him later. After all, isn’t that what he wanted? Isn’t that what you were there for? You’re supposed to be his good little girl who is happy and cheerful and doesn’t let her feelings get in the way. That was the arrangement. Something you had to remind yourself of more and more lately. You should have walked out of his hotel room last year and never looked back.
When dinnertime comes and goes that evening, you try not to worry. When midnight comes and goes, you try not to panic. When the next day comes and goes and you don’t see Elvis and you don’t hear from him and you’re just stuck in this goddamn California mansion alone, you try not to break down. You try and you fail. And when he doesn’t show up at all, you vow you’re done. No one deserves to be treated this way, not even a Las Vegas showgirl who is just one of Elvis’s many women. You’re on your way out the door to the airport, bag in hand, when the phone rings, and the maid answers - of course it’s for you. It’s him. You hesitate just a moment, your hand hovering over the receiver, before picking it up and slamming it right back down again. Damn the arrangement. And damn Elvis Presley. You were through.
Las Vegas - August 1970
The feeling of hands in your hair doesn’t startle you. In fact it has the opposite effect, it only serves to melt you further into the couch. Elvis’s fingers are long and cool and expertly move across your scalp, knowing the spots that make you purr, just like a damn cat. He’s had enough time over the past year to learn your body inside and out, learn what sends you to the moon, learn what breaks you. He takes great pleasure in watching you squirm, listening to you gasp and plead, feeling you tremble underneath his body.
“Someone’s feelin’ a little tipsy, hmm darlin’?” he murmurs. You blink your eyes open and Elvis swims into view above you. Your breath catches in your throat and your face flushes with heat. Turns out you aren’t through with Elvis Presley. Not even close.
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PART 2
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Tags (I used my taglist for my Tomorrow series - if you want to be removed from this one just let me know!): @jelliedonut @butlersxbirdy @elvisabutler @precious-little-scoundrel @eliseinmemphis @powerofelvis @richardslady121 @meladollsims @godlypresley @isthlsfate @rjmartin11 @thatbanditqueen @ccab @mslizziesblog
#elvis presley#elvis#elvis fanfic#elvis fanfiction#elvis x y/n#elvis x you#elvis x reader#elvis presley x reader#elvis imagine#elvis presley fic#elvis presley fanfiction#elvis smut#austin elvis x reader#austin elvis imagine#just like a woman#written by ab4eva
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Fanfic ask game (the movie, the sequel): 👀📥😈🤔⏰
(Sorry if I am choosing the wrong emojis whyyyyy do they look different on laptop vs computer??)
👀 Do you have any WIPs that you would never let see the light of day? If yes, what are they about?
bus kids existence of all time (agents of shield s4 au + fitz/jemma/daisy/robbie polycule) unfortunately :((( it just needs SO much rewriting bc i've changed/grown so much as a writer since i first started it, and i'm v limited on time </3
📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on?
currently it's either any of my braindead fics or trial by fire!! braindead fics bc they're generally low on engagement so getting anything would be a really nice surprise, and tbf because it's currently my favorite thing i have posted rn!! i'm very proud of it <3 but i KNOWW it's gonna get overtaken by something's in your eyes when i finally get around to posting that. (btw do NOT read trial by fire if u don't want spoilers for graceland s2!!)
😈 Is there anything you enjoy doing that you think your readers hate?
ERMMMMM tbh idk!! i've never gotten any comments complaining about anything before so likeee who knows! not me <3
🤔 What is the hardest part of writing fic?
EDITINGGGGGGGGGG. i also find titling incredibly difficult and it's usually one of the very last steps i take in completing a fic, but editing is still so much worse 😭 i've had fics stuck in editing limbo for over a year before bc i've had so many things in it that i didn't know how to phrase the way i wanted or how to fix issues i was having.
⏰ Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?
depends! when i'm on breaks from school, i spend a LOT more time writing than reading because i'm usually trying to work on or even finish as many wips as i can before i have to go back. but during semesters i usually read more than write or it's about 50/50 just because of time constraints.
(fanfic ask game!!)
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Interview with L’Officiel Hommes Italia (2021)
In preparation for the second season of Bridgerton, Jonathan Bailey took daily horse riding lessons. The actor, who got his start due to the global success of Shonda Rimes' Netflix series, has a story that's waiting to be discovered. His story peaks through when he shares his favorite song, "Graceland" by Paul Simon. The song that shares the journey down Route 61 towards Elvis Presley's estate in Memphis is not one that people would assume, but it's what makes Bailey all the more intriguing. In reality, it serves as a metaphor for a long, cathartic trip that shares the end of Simon's poignant romance with actress Carrie Fisher. If this isn't enough to make you wonder what else is on Bailey's mind, the actor dives deeper into his quirks and passions with L'OFFICIEL.
L'OFFICIEL: Bridgerton was the most-watched series ever on Netflix. How has your life changed since the show aired?
JONATHAN BAILEY: I feel exactly the same as before. It is true, for some more practical things there have been changes, but I'm still the same. Success came at a time when everyone's life has changed dramatically, I can't see my friends but that's what we're experiencing, not my success.
L'O: The second season of Bridgerton will focus on Anthony, the character you play. In the first chapter of this saga, we saw how much your character had to sacrifice because of his fears ...
JB: It will be a second season with lots of surprises for all the main characters. I have a soft spot for Anthony, not just because he's the character I play. I think he has a complicated and troubled history. I can't wait to show everyone what will happen to him and to accompany him on his path to happiness. Mamma Bridgerton (Ruth Gemmell) is amazing and you will see her support Anthony exactly like she did with Daphne and then next season she will do the same with ... I can't say, that would be a crazy spoiler.
L'O: How does it feel to know that you're in a saga that will, in all likelihood, last eight seasons?
JB: I'm going to get older as the younger Bridgerton brothers grow up and become adults, it's going to be weird. But being in such a production is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
L'O: And how exactly do you feel after the success of this project?
JB: It seems to me to be in a hurricane, but still and in the center. I see everything turning and I wonder what's happening, but at the same time, I'm in the tranquility of my home. Hearing my friends reassures me and brings me back down to earth.
L'O: Despite your 900,000 followers, you're not the social networking type?
JB: I enjoy Instagram and I love photography a lot, but I'm also a reserved type. Social media allows you to communicate with a lot of people, which you wouldn't normally do, that sense of connection is exciting. I like knowing that I have the opportunity to see what is happening but also to be able to step back and stay at the right distance from it.
L'O: You are very reserved, yet you decided to come out early in your career?
JB: Actually, I've always thought only about being myself. There were no strategies. The truth is that as an actor I approach a project with a different approach every time. I have always trusted the directors I have worked with, and therefore I found myself playing many different roles that I have always believed in. Thanks to Netflix, Bridgerton arrives in countries where homosexuality is still illegal, and perhaps knowing that you have an openly gay actor in the cast who plays a role like Anthony's can make a difference.
L'O: Have you ever regretted this choice?
JB: There are times when it's more difficult, but I've never regretted it. I believe that gays must somehow always adapt, learn to dodge certain obstacles. We grew up in an age where we had to learn to be creative to survive. Being openly gay in the theater is completely different from being gay in the cinema or television environment. If you work hard, there are entry points and no matter what you like, it only matters if you're good.
L'O: After being in various cinema productions, theater productions, musicals, and TV series, what was the turning point of your career?
JB: I think a really big thing for me was the 2013 National Theater live [production of] Othello. Being there, in that theater, I felt totally overwhelmed. I had six auditions, and I really cared about it because playing Cassio was a privilege. It was the end of December when they told me I got the part, and I remember it was the best way to celebrate Christmas.
L'O: What kind of friend are you?
JB: I like watching what my friends are doing, enjoying good times with them, and being there in difficult ones, that's empathy. The past year has brought us much closer, at least I think so. We are all tested by what is happening to us and knowing that we have the support of loved ones is essential. I have many acting friends with whom I talk regularly and above all from whom I ask for feedback when my work comes out and vice versa. When their time comes I almost feel it more, I get very excited.
L'O: Were there times when you thought about giving up your acting career?
JB: Sure, I've thought that many times. But then, as in any job, you have to be able to work on your weaknesses and, in my case, to be able to play roles that may not be made for you and to be able to accept that those you think are perfect for your strings are not assigned to you. At one point I thought, If this audition goes badly I will try to go to work in a circus. I am still surprised and I will never cease to amaze myself at what is happening to me.
L'O: When you collected the Laurence Olivier Award in 2019 for your performance in the musical Company, you spoke of love. What is love for you today?
JB: I think it's when everything suddenly aligns and you feel on the right side, when everything finally feels right.
L'O: Are you in love?
JB: Now, I feel full of love and I wonder if I've always felt this way. I come from a nice large family. I believe that life gives you many surprises and that love comes in different forms. But in the end, the secret is really to learn to love each other and then make room for what comes and love it to the fullest.
L'O: You definitely love music. What do you like?
JB: Drake, and today I discovered Sonia, a Croatian singer. I get lost in Spotify's suggestions and make wonderful discoveries. Do you know what a singer I love is? Tove Lo. I listened to her throughout the first lockdown.
L'O: And if you had to choose a song that is your song, what would it be?
JB: "Graceland" by Paul Simon.
L'O: What are you good at?
JB: I'm sure I'm a good listener. I like to pay attention to whoever is talking to me. But I would like to learn to say no more often.
L'O: The thing you miss the most about pre-pandemic life?
JB: Dinners, parties with friends, and the theater. When we went to the theater we took it for granted, thinking about it now it was so nice to be able to enjoy three hours out of this world.
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#jonathan bailey#jonny bailey#interviews#interviews:2021#officiel hommes interview#l'officiel hommes italia#l'officiel hommes italia interview
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