#got really busy and life happened

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s5 episode 14 thoughts

we left off on some pretty high stakes last episode: bridges burning, eyeballs oozing, etc. now we must jump back in!

this episode is called “the red and the black”, huh… (les mis starts playing in the distance)

post episode thoughts: damn. this episode was full of twists and turns. the CSM lore goes CRAZY. krycek is your problematic bisexual representation. i do not believe that genes determine someone's capacity for evil, but i am going to have to ask this spender fellow to please back tf away from our agents. marita, you must defeat the ratboy in combat. please increase your studies of the blade. and perhaps most importantly, i love when mulder is written first and foremost as scully's loverboy and partner. yeah.

we begin with a recap of last episode, and ewww, those poor boy's eyes are soooo drippy and gross.

WHO IS THIS WRITING TO THEIR SON??? and who is this little boy in the winter snow, forced to be the mailman?

this mystery man is typing up a letter mentioning war gods, while this young child is out in the woods. someone go fetch this small child. he is wandering about. knocking on someone’s door and receiving a letter and dollar bill 

the mystery man is sending this red enveloped letter to the FBI???

wait hold on… it's a man living deep in the woods… writing a letter to his son in the FBI… is this CSM playing on the bastard mulder allegations…? because the typewriter… it’s CSM coded…

a bold swing and likely an equally bold miss, but we shall see

(i was so close and yet so far from the truth)

YOOO THE INTRO WAS SHORT *AND* WE GOT DIFFERENT WORDS THIS TIME!!! it says “resist or serve”! it has been a while since those have gotten changed up. hmm. "resist or serve" i do not care for that!!

back to the bridge slash dam area where we last saw many people gathering, including cassandra and scully. the burning has taken place!!! it was in pennsylvania?! that’s a bit of a drive from DC!!!

the medical personnel are arriving, and so is mulder!!! he’s running on his absurdly long legs while his coat billows behind him!!! does he know scully was here????

look at these bodies, they’re burned beyond any recognition!! it's horrible.

is that scully he finds??? no, and thank god for that.

skinner is here!!! mulder is yelling at him, asking if she was here, and he says she is!! and she is alive!!!

she was huddled in the woods… with a bunch of other survivors… and she had burns, but strangely all her fluids and electrolytes were gone!! the nurse tells these two men to gtfo because she is in vasogenic shock, which is not a term i know the meaning of 

look at mulder touching her hair while she is unresponsive...

(god, getting in those medical devices for a scene must be the worst)

they’re taking her away and he’s trying to follow!!! but they’re taking her in the helicopter. i thought for a second he would try and hop on and cause a scene, but he actually didn't do this.

(gruff skinner voice) “what happened here, mulder?” “the answer just got loaded onto that chopper!”

omg… are krycek’s people going to be after her, too?!? like they were after that poor boy dmitri??

agent spender is here, too. he wants to know if his mother has been found. :(

jump to a wildly different scene. is the well-groomed man a surgeon?? we see that marita is intubated!!! she was found on the roadside after her cryptic call with mulder, and it doesn’t look good for her survival. nooo, she has to live so she can backstab krycek. please hear me, queen.

OHHH he opens her eyeball and sees it covered in that nasty black oil stuff… and the syndicate is watching from above?!?! what will they do!! can they run some trials??

MULDER BRUSHING SCULLY’S HAIR TO WAKE HER UP IN THE HOSPITAL BED AND THEN SMILING GENTLY AT HER…. OH MY GOD I NEED TO LAY DOWN

if you could HEAR the noise that just came out of my throat….

LOOK AT HIM LOOKING AT HER, OH MY GOOOOOD

she asks what time is it and he LAUGHS!! oh my god, she nearly died and she just wants to know the hour... scully, you are so precious

he laughs at this question and she asks “why are you laughing?” <-OH SHE’S SELF-CONSCIOUS. STOP. I’LL CRY!!!

“i’m not laughing at you. i’m just very happy to be standing here talking to you, that’s all” <- OH MY GOD HE LOVES HER SO BAAAAAAAD he was so gentle in that explanation

(god. rereading these notes is killing me all over again. he loves her, he loves her, he loves her, a million times over. the way he explained to her that he's not making fun of her, he's just relived she's okay... oh mulder. you sweet man. absolute pathetic wet cat of a guy. you are so dear to me)

((SEE, WRITERS? see what mulder can be?! this is the man i recognize! jot that down! he's a lover!))

she asks him what she is doing here, suddenly panicked. and he gently explains, raising her bed so she can sit up while taking a seat next to her. oh my god. the tenderness. it will kill me a thousand times.

(there is something addictive stored in hospital scenes. the relief of realizing that someone is still with you, the terrible possessiveness it provokes after you almost lost them, realizing how lucky you are to have them in your life, loving someone at their most vulnerable, and the person in the hospital bed allowing themselves to be loved and cared for......... bottle it up. let it sit in the cellar and i'll pour it out only on the most special of occasions)

she can’t remember what happened. oh my god, she’s so scared :( the report on the incident is playing in her room.

she has no memories of what went on at the dam, but at this time a nurse comes in and lays her back down, saying she needs her blood pressure to come back up, and shooing mulder out. oh, i paused to write this down and she looks like a deer in the headlights. so trapped.

he says he’ll come back, but she has something to say!!! he’s out the door with a thumb’s up, though, trying to reassure her it'll be okay as she has no idea wtf is going on 

i’ve said it once i’ll say it again: poor scully :(

agent spender is here!! they didn’t find his mother, and he wants to know what mulder was “doing with her”. she hasn’t driven in a long time, and he knows scully was meeting with her!!! he wants them to leave her alone :( but now scully is wrapped up in this, too. so his mother might be the key to getting answers. agent spender, you may not get your wish.

oh, back to the russian ship in the new york harbor. krycek is chained up!!! well-groomed man is here… is some torture about to go down??

he says that the ship is heading back to russia tomorrow, and he is (sarcastically) sure that krycek's gulag pals will be happy to see him after his whole cutting and running deal. well-groomed man is dripping water into his mouth, and it’s making me thirsty.

OHHH get him for me: “your alliance with her was as misguided as ours, but it appears she was unaware of the consequences of her deception” marita... you are so mysterious...

omg, so krycek infected the boy so that anyone who betrayed him would also get infected!!!!

damn. did not wanna see krycek taking the W here. marita, you NEED to get better NOW and get some revenge.

but dmitri is dead!!! he died in the pennsylvania incident. 

krycek says that well-groomed man has to make a deal with him… but well-groomed man is no fool!

NOOOO I GOOGLED THE WELL-GROOMED MAN TO MAKE SURE I WAS USING THE RIGHT NAME (and i WASN’T, it’s “WELL-MANICURED MAN” and i got a SPOILER💔)

this is why i should not do these things. if i call someone by the wrong name, y’all are just gonna have to let me know in the replies and cringe through my mistaken posts.

damn. 

well. it’s been 2 seasons. i might as well keep calling him the wrong name.

okay, so he put together that if krycek was willing to infect the boy, he also must have had a cure for him, developed by the russians. krycek is silent at this. 

AND THIS WOULD MEAN RESISTANCE TO THE COLONISTS IS NOW POSSIBLE ‼️‼️

OHHH well-groomed man is YELLING AT HIM!!!! “DO YOU HAVE THE VACCINE?” damn, it's very echo-y place to yell, in the bottom of a soviet ship. 

hmm… well-groomed man leaves. i hope he finds the vaccine and it is not copyrighted by anyone and the whole world can become immune to oil aliens. this is the good ending.

okay, what the hell is going on now! a plane just exploded? where did this take place?? someone is dragging a body away. and a ton of military personnel are moving in. 

OMG THE BODY DRAGGER IS THE NO FACE GUY FROM BEFORE!!! who was lighting the people on fire in the last episode!! is he an alien?? was that his spaceship??

back to more important matters at hand: scully. she’s looking through the photos of the incident at the dam that she was in attendance of, but cannot recall anything. and she is sitting up now, so that means improvement!

she cannot tell you where this place even is- but none of the other survivors have been able to give an account, either. very interesting that they felt called there but cannot recount it.

mulder found more implants in the bodies, which would explain how she and the others got there. must be her new implant that cured the cancer also inspires the feelings of restlessness that brought the others abductees to the dam. but it doesn’t explain why they wanted those people dead, or why she lived.

“all comes down to a question, scully, one that hasn’t been answered or… i don’t even think honestly addressed: who made that chip in your neck?” <- OH SHOOT... HE’S (finally) GOING THERE!!!

it was found in a military research facility… he’s convinced it was the government that did all this, to do biological experiments and warfare

“the truth i’ve been searching for? the truth is in you” <- oh my god… the truth being her… hold on, i need a moment for that one.

the truth being something that is physically within someone, and as a result, being able to hold The Truth; the truth being the forceful result of autonomy being stripped away; the truth being an act of violence; the truth being the north star that guides you; all of these things being in contradiction and embodied in dana scully. i am getting ideas for poetry out of this line. everybody say thank you mulder for making me want to pick up a pencil.

oh shoot. i sense some stuff is about to go down.

“mulder, when i met you five years ago, you told me that your sister had been abducted… by aliens” (he smiles, as if thinking his past self is foolish, or recalling that first night together, or both of these things)

“that that event had marked you so deeply that nothing else mattered. i didn’t believe you, but i followed you, on nothing more than your faith that the truth was out there, based not on facts, not on science, but on your memories that your sister had been taken from you. your memories were all that you had”

(faith being a motif in scully's life... faith not in what he thinks, but in him as a person... belief being a motif in both of their lives in opposite directions... her faith placed in him and in science, and his in her and in the unknown... man, hold on...)

“i don’t trust those memories now”, he points out.

“well, whether you trust them or not, they’ve led you here. and me. but i have no memories to either trust nor distrust, and if you ask me now to follow you again, to stand behind you in what you now believe, without knowing what happened to me out there, without those memories, i can’t. i won’t”

oh my god. ohhhh my god. is this the end? do they travel no further upon this twisted road together? and if it is the end, can we even blame her?

he gets up and looks out the window, probably to conceal the inner turmoil

he wants to give her those memories, to prove that what he believed for so long was wrong… but she asks if that is really what he wants

:( :(

this has the sort of emotional weight that makes me think i'll be unpacking it for decades. i will give it room to nestle into my soul, break my heart, and then dissect it in detail at a later time.

back to the syndicate. according to their reports, the guy with no face seems to have lost his facial features in self-mutilation done as protection (??). no facial features is protection against infection by the black oil!!! omg!!!

he’s an alien rebel!!!! omg!! that is what the boy saw last episode! so this alien rebel was the one that did the torching!! he’s fighting against the alien colonists!!!

a war has begun!!! 

OH SHIT!!! well-groomed man HAS the vaccine!! it was what was in that bottle that krycek stole last episode! do you think he’s telling the truth, or just bluffing to try and inspire resistance against the colonists?! well, we can find it out if we inject marita...

well-groomed man wants to side with the rebel, but the other dude says that the alien colonists will squash them! a terrible dilemma. reminds me of the civil war plotline in skyrim. you must take a stand against the aliens!!!!

so they inject marita….

but before we can learn if that mystery liquid krycek snatched from the gulag has any effects on marita, we cut to dr. werber’s office!!! he asks if scully is okay with this, and she quietly says she is. mulder is playing with his tie on the other end of the couch.

oh my god, so even though he didn't trust his own memories, he's going to bring her to his doctor to undergo the same process? he must really want to prove she experienced what she did.

the doctor is laying her down, and she’s watching mulder before she closes her eyes and tries to relax everything…. is it going to work??

OH!! she’s screaming!!! and mulder is freaked tf out as she does so!!!

she’s recalling the ship flying over…

and she’s groaning, tapping the couch next to mulder, wordlessly asking for him to hold her hand as she relives the awful moments (oh my GOD???)

she’s remembering the people with no faces lighting the others on fire. and there’s another ship!! and the rebels are burned up by the ship!! 

and then the second ship TAKES cassandra!! from right next to her!! they all lift their hands in supplication and she rises up out of her wheelchair!!! the aliens beam her up!!

she’s still yelling when the doctor tries to get her to come back, and it takes three tries to do so. she finally does, and she’s still panting when she turns to look at mulder and asks him if he was there the whole time. and he nods.

so that means that her body knew she needed to hold his hand despite her not being mentally present at all... the way they need each other...

holy fuck, we have never seen scully screaming in that level of distress before. and we have seen some CRAZY scully distress!! like when she lost her father, or when she confronted her sister’s killer. but this was SO out of body, the whole thing, like watching her worst nightmare.

and what is mulder thinking right now?? is he back in his alien era?? how does it feel to watch your best friend scream and scream in terror, knowing you can do nothing to stop it because the terrible things already happened??

please just cuddle for a bit, you two. take a breather.

SKINNER LISTENED TO THE TAPE OF HER BEING HYPNOTIZED!!! oh my god. imagine your boss listening to your worst memories…

despite sitting through scully having her own experience, mulder still refers to the memory of his sister’s abduction as false. so does he think this didn’t really happen to scully, either? i mean, they found her body there, and like 50 dead people! if i’m mulder i’d be thinking gee, maybe i was wrong about the memories of my youth being false!! this seems a little suspicious!! what is this man thinking...?

skinner clarifies that he needs to make a REPORT and this is nothing to go on. well. this is not unusual. 

mulder says the whole thing was staged by the government, and cassandra was taken by a military aircraft. but i ask: how would the government manage to kill 50 people and embed false memories in the others??

i mean, false memories through repeated hypnotherapy sessions for just mulder seems possible. it would take a while, but maybe they could convince him of the nature of his sister's disappearance being supernatural. but how could they do that so suddenly, and to so many people at once? i'm not buying it.

this explanation does not seem to please the pensive skinner

“over the past five years, i’ve doubted you, only to be persuaded by the power of your belief in extraterrestrial phenomena. and i’m doubting you now not because of that belief, but… because extraterrestrial phenomena is, frankly, the more plausible explanation” <- ohhh, we are allowed some insight into the enigma that is skinner’s mind…

(it is actually really interesting to see how skinner views mulder and the nature of his work and beliefs. i've wondered where he falls on the spectrum of believer to non-believer for a while; i guess i thought he was somewhere in the middle, not committed to anything beyond catching the bad guy of the day. if using secret psychic thwarting tricks helps get a killer off of the streets, by all means, he'll let mulder give it a go. but i think his skepticism on the authenticity of his claims makes sense. sure buddy, you can go buy a ghost detecting machine if it makes the public safer. just... get things done)

“then i suggest you put that in your report”, snaps mulder, who gets up to leave. BRO IS ALWAYS SO SNIPPY WITH SKINNER. HE IS ON YOUR SIDE. BE NICE TO HIM. meanwhile scully is sitting here in immense pain trying to figure out wtf is going on….

back to marita. the other syndicate guy is proclaiming that the vaccine does not work. he wants to turn the alien rebel over!!

but well-groomed man says they have to hold onto him- if they turn him in, they lose all chance of resistance!! i’m lowkey with him here. like, through the power of friendship everything is possible. consider that.

NOOO, this other guy says he already turned the alien rebel back over, and well-groomed man is left in shock! how wild our narrative is that i had come to root for him for a brief moment, and now feel sad that his ideas have been shot down!!

why is agent spender down in the basement office... did he let himself into the office of our agents? i do not like this one bit. he is not visually intimidating, but his aura is unsettling.

what is this dude doing…? he says he’s here about his mother. but he’s asking scully weird questions…

he wants to know what scully and his mother talked about. then he starts playing a video of baby him!!! and it seems he is doing regression hypnosis, and he’s recalling cassandra going up into the sky. but he says none of it happened!!! he said his mom told him to say those things!!!

he claims she told the story over and over again to make up for the fact that his dad left them and it drove his mother insane. which. doesn't really explain everything, but i guess it's a start.

he thinks dr. werber indulged in his mother’s fantasies and that his methods are dangerous and unsound, and she ought to question anything she experienced in his office

“well i appreciate your opinion, agent spender,  but i don’t have a mother feeding me abduction stories” <- GET HIM ‼️

“you’ve got agent mulder, don’t you?” <- OHHH, DON’T GO THERE YOU BRAT. and besides, he doesn’t even BELIEVE IN THAT STUFF ANYMORE. get lost.

(editing these notes and this pissed me tf off again. because how dare he imply that mulder is manipulating her psychologically instead of being her partner and seeing her as an equal? god forbid the two of them respect each other. no, clearly it MUST be that the man is taking advantage of the woman, tricking her into thinking alien thoughts in the same way spender's mother did to him. right?!? (heavy on the /s, btw) don't piss me off, buddy. implying their relationship is not built on mutual respect is going to piss me off EVERY time, no matter who is comes from!!!)

he tells her not to let herself be used, and there are tears in her eyes :( well right now, mr. spender, you seem like the one doing the using

when mulder gets home, he finds a note on the floor: “things are looking up” OH SHIT, SOMEONE IS ATTACKING HIM

“you must be losing it, mulder. i can beat you with one hand” GTFO KRYCEK I’M SERIOUS!!! I’LL CALL PEST CONTROL

“isn’t that how you like to beat yourself?” <- LMAOOOOO mulder may be on the ground with a gun in his face, but that man ALWAYS has a one liner 

“hear this, agent mulder, because what i’m telling you is deadly serious: there is a war raging, and unless you pull out of the sand, you and i and about five billion other people are going to go the way of the dinosaur” <- oh shit… he has to pick a side… between the colonists and the resistance!!

is the whole fate of the world really in his hands? can he not share that responsibility with his friends?

mulder is laughing at his claims of alien colonization. 

“one rule: resist or serve” <- KRYCEK SAID THE WORDS ON THE SCREEN

he calls krycek a murder and a liar and a coward, and asks how is he supposed to trust him!!! points were made!!

the mass incinerations were to disrupt the colonization… and one man is being held captive. if he dies, so does the resistance. hmm. how do you know all this, krycek? source: trust me bro

DID HE JUST KISS MULDER???

krycek is your problematic bisexual representation… wow. who would have guessed?

(been 3 days now since i watched this episode and i am STILL shocked. yeah yeah i KNOW he's russian, and european people smooch sometimes when they say hello, but that is NOT what happened here. at all. he was pinning mulder to the ground, filled with fury, and then lust overtook, as it so often does)

he gives his gun to mulder…. and says good luck in russian, leaving a very angry and sad agent on the floor. damn. i also need a moment to process that. 

let us take some time together to ponder.

okay.

HEY! i know this guy from the air force base! he’s the alien bounty hunter!! and he’s breaking in!!!

mulder is sitting on his couch in despair when in comes scully.

“what are you doing sitting here in the dark?” “thinking” “about what?” “oh the usual- destiny, fate, how to throw a curveball… the inextricable relationships in our lives that are neither accidental nor somehow entirely in our control, either” <- poetic!!

the intimacy of knocking on your bestie's door and he is just sitting there pondering with all of the lights off... wow.

she comes to tell him she’s reconsidered her experiences with dr. werber!! nooo, do not let spender get to you!! and mulder has also done some reconsidering of his own… 

has his alien era returned??

krycek’s note left the name of an air base on the back!! they must go to find answers!!

no mention of the kiss to scully, which is fine i guess. but i would have been curious to see her reaction. she's pretty unflappable, although maybe she'd say he's unfolding like a flower again. and he’s out the door. 

they’re being let into the base at night. poor scully looks very sleepy. 

OHHH THE GUY DOESN’T WANT TO LET THEM IN…. and he says his name wrong (lmao), so mulder says there is a leak and that someone inside requires immediate medical aid.

HE CALLS THE GUY “SON”? “why don’t you go check on that, son. i’d hate for somebody to die because you were uninformed” <- woah. that was very weird. him calling someone that feels off and strange.

mulder wants to gun it to get into the facility while the gate guy is investigating his claims, but scully is surprised to know that she recognizes the driver of the truck across from them!!!

while the guard is being told he needs to place our agents under military arrest, mulder has hatched onto the back of the other truck!! scully is just sitting there like wtf, and is now being arrested. he loves to jump on a moving vehicle. 

so he’s inside this tented area on the back of the truck and finds a locked box with the faceless alien rebel inside!!!! but the truck is stopping; have they been caught??

OH!! the guy driving IS THE SHAPESHIFTER!!! and he’s coming to go get the faceless rebel. what is mulder to do???

alien bounty hunter is coming to get the rebel; he pops out the needle…. but something is afoot! everything is bathed in light and shaking!!! 

the faceless man is being lifted up… but mulder screams “noooooooo” and fires his gun??? THAT WAS VERY BLURRY AND CONFUSING!! what just happened!!!!

are we back to marita now?? yes, we are!!! she seems to be free of oil in her eyes!!!

meanwhile, mulder is being arrested, but the rebel alien isn’t there!!! WHERE DID HE GOOOO?!

the agents are going on a date to jail. he’s covered in sweat and he doesn’t know what happened while he was out there….. she grabs his hand…. so romantic

spender is arriving into skinner’s office. what is going on here? he shared there is no news about his mother. oh, mulder has opened a xx file on the case…

skinner clarifies that this has no effect on spender's position in the FBI. and mentions that he has a patron who thinks highly of him??? WHO??? no one knows??? someone with a high level of influence??? oh, that is concerning. 

IS IT HIS DAD???

when he walks out her gets a letter from quebec… and it’s in a red envelope!! the same as that kid was holding at the very start of the episode!!!!

up in quebec, that kid is delivering another letter to the mysterious cabin…. and the letter was returned.

IT’S CSM??????? 

I KNEW HE WASN’T DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CSM has a son and a family he left…. omfg…. and he’s hiding out in CANADA???? 

THIS ANSWERED NO QUESTIONS. AND EVEN RAISED NEW ONES.

okay, after seeing the whole episode, here are my thoughts:

still losing it at krycek kissing mulder’s cheek. i just KNOW the slash girlies were losing their MINDS. as they had every right to do! i felt your joy across time and space.

so, the vaccine against the alien oil works! if we can simply inject every single person in the world, we should be able to put up a resistance fight!! and also we will need to get a lot of those green needles that kill the shapeshifting aliens. which probably also come from outer space. so we'll need a mass scale smuggling. no biggie. /s

what happened to the resistance fighter??? did he get out?? was he taken away by the evil colonist aliens?? 

and who bailed these two out!!!

is mulder back in his believer era?? he has to be!!! 

marita is alive… you have to stop the ratboy, queen. you need to lock in. idgaf if he’s the one who knows about the aliens. wait until the alien stuff is sorted out and then stab him. for me. train hard to complete the task you have been assigned.

CSM HAD A FAMILY!!! HOLY HELL, LET’S CIRCLE BACK TO THAT SHALL WE?? and he left them!!! but he kept writing letters!! that is CRAZY!!!

rip my boy dmitri :(

i watched this episode 3 days ago and there is still SO much to process. it might take a long time. typical jam-packed sort of episode. is this what we refer to as the "myth arc"? because it establishes the mythology and main plot? am i using this term correctly? please do share. and also please tell me if the following things gagged you:

CSM alive reveal, CSM family reveal, alien rebel reveal, marita knowing krycek reveal, krycek smooching mulder reveal, scully screaming under hypnosis, mulder gently brushing her hair out of her face, etc etc. thank you very much.

[cabbagestrand]

to that anon who always reminds me of diakko week, bless you and thank you so much. i wouldve really loved to participate but ive really been busy the past years, was hectic yall. just wanna shout out that person, whoo, ill try and drop something before i disappear again for the final(!) semester. heres a chilling capybara i sculpted tho!

[lae-zels]

mr house never being able to replicate his courier six because they never let him scan them, so all he has are a few shoddy recordings he took to recreate the courier from. his replicas of courier six are flawed: none are as perceptive, resourceful and proactive. they aren't good at out-of-the-box thinking or improvising. their problemsolving, diplomacy skills and technological innovation ideas fall short of the original and are just another disappointment every time. they end up hollow shells like jane, marilyn and victor. letting new vegas go, ruin itself in pursuit of recreating his perfect right hand again, hope for another fruitful partnership and bright future of the mojave like they did before is so delicious it makes me sick actually send tweet ✌

[toreii]

Silver: “………………nngh.”

Malleus: “There’s no point worrying about it here. Let’s head back to the farewell party.”

Silver: “………Could you…go back first, please?”

Malleus: “Silver?”

Silver: “I’ll follow soon…….guhh.”

Malleus: “What’s wrong? ……Are you crying?”

Silver: “F-Forgive me. Uugh…I’m showing you a pitiful sight.”

Malleus: “Don’t apologize. Children also cry.”

Silver: “I’m already 17. I will be an adult next year.”

Silver: “In the eyes of Lord Malleus and Father, I’m no different than a child, but…”

Silver: “17 years ago……my father found me as a baby deep in the forest in Briar Valley.”

Malleus: “…………”

Silver: “Father is a fairy, I’m a human. No blood ties, no obligation to raise me……nothing.”

Silver: “But, he raised me as his own child.”

Silver: “He fed me every day, taught me lessons, and stayed by my side all night when I went to bed.”

Silver: “Fairies and humans are different in terms of behavior, speed of growth…everything.”

Silver: “Few people know how to raise humans in Briar Valley. Besides, my father is single.”

Silver: “How difficult it was to raise a human baby without anyone to rely on……”

Silver: “I can’t thank him enough. I was going to spend my whole life repaying the favor……!”

Silver: “Even though……I still haven’t repaid him anything!”

Silver: “That person is about to die alone in a distant country.”

Malleus: “………………”

Silver: “My…father can no longer use magic, and his body is weakening…”

Silver: “Even if the day comes when I forget everything, I hope I can always support him by my side…!”

Malleus: “……Lilia has a good son.”

Silver: “I’m not a good son. I can’t even fulfill one of father’s wishes.”

Silver: “I want to send him off with a smile, just as he wanted……”

Silver: “I… I… uuuhh, uuuugh…!”

Malleus: “…………”

Malleus: “You said you were nothing to Lilia. “‘No blood connections, or an obligation to raise you’…”

Malleus: “I’m sure Lilia thinks the same way.”

Silver: “…Huh?”

Malleus: “A human life is surprisingly short compared to long-lived fairies like us.”

Malleus: “Devoting yourself, a human being, to wither for your own sake. I don’t believe there’s an obligation.”(?)

Silver: “Father……why……”

Malleus: “…………”

[canisonicscrewyou]

Fuck this entire week oh my fucking godddd. This felt like a little trial. Hurdles to get through the last of Busy Season for the year.

This week:

I shut down my store's entire IT system while being guided through a troubleshoot and it took ~45 minutes to fix it

Rolled + landed on my ankle on my walk to work on Halloween. Had to limp into work.

On Halloween I also had to kick out an intoxicated dude on a bike who tried to serve himself water out of a crushed, grimy to-go cup by leaning his entire body over the bar after going to the registers to ask ME for a cup of water. Left after telling me he has two no-trespassing orders from my store.

Had to hobble my way home because I had no way of getting a ride because my city closes down half the streets for Halloween.

Worked through my bruised and busted up ankle for ~3 days while another coworker called out to. Probably catch up on school work.

Nearly cried at work like. Several. Times. Partially from overwhelm and confusion and now partially from pain.

Watched my boss feel immensely bad after seeing My Ouchie and then went home. (<- only for my fiancé to come in to pick me up and then when I wasn't there, tell my boss and coworker that I should have called out today which is. Correct.)

Now I'm really just sitting with my injured leg Up High and On Ice

I got to see some fireworks, dress up as Will Graham, my coworker gave me the last of her cigarettes, and I got to post fic though so. Not all bad. I guess.

[pkmoth]

having swap au thoughts. *slaps roof of claus* there's so much mental illness in this guy. im gonna blow up everyone in the room and then myself

[alfhildr-the-word-weaver]

I got thinking too much about Marwa from What We Do in the Shadows again and how she was canonically making observations of Jupiter and Saturn in the 1200s. Then I thought about how Elena took Damon to go watch a meteor shower, and I decided that Marwa and Elena should get away from all the vampire drama B.S. in their lives and go nerd out about astronomy together, and this moodboard sort of happened. I also thought about how Elena becomes a doctor and went ah, they are both women in STEM! So I ran with that as a theme too.

But yeah, Marwa needs a friend who will actually support her interests and engage with her intellectually (no shade to Nadja and the Guide, I'm glad they had a fun weekend watching Mamma Mia together which was literally the only time we got to actually see Marwa happy onscreen, but they have never demonstrated much interest in science that I can recall and I want Marwa to have an astronomy buddy), and I think Elena would be fascinated by her and her perspectives on astronomy from centuries ago, and they could learn about modern astronomical advances together. If I find the time and energy I might even write fic about it, but for now, here is a moodboard so that we can all bask in the vibes of my beautiful crossover vision together.

Image sources: x x x / x (the first frame of x gif + a screenshot from x) x / x + x x x

[pollen]

hi fellow neurodivergent people

i hate to jump on the "i think i might have adhd" bandwagon, but if i think i might have adhd, how do i bring it up to my care team as a 28-year-old cis woman who was a massive overachiever until i couldn't keep up the ruse anymore?

[lostwanderer42]

Been doing a lot of thinking lately with peoples obsessions with punishing fictional characters who did bad things and i dont have any coherent thoughts yet but i am like. Are yall ok

[iamonlyhereforthefreefood]

.

[bitegore]

Got to dream about being Erica last night, which was cool. Specifically in like, a no-Haven AU but when I finally got to break out all of the poisons, dose literally all the food, and start smashing people's heads in with crochet mallets, my GOD that shit was satisfying.

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

Megumi’s life in ur “tsumiki and megumi are seperated” AU is super fucked. Does Gojo secretly put him on supervillain watch. Does he try to give him the worst counselling anyone has ever seen.

Worse he keeps trying to become Megumi’s New Dad and Megumi cannot emphasize enough how much he does not want him to do this. Why does Gojo keep asking him to throw a baseball with him. Why does he keep trying to ruffle his hair.

[milkfake]

Drawing RP talk making me so nostalgic what the fuck. I miss seeing you draw silly things like that with your guys!

Hoping I can get back into it a little bit! I’m really glad people enjoyed seeing them, because I enjoyed doing them.

[lucalicatteart]

Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 13: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression

(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)

Yesterday's poll decided that The Adventurer should just start crying whilst being robbed in the abandoned barn ...

~

(----- tw for mild violence (he gets into sort of a fight) until after the next orange text section in parentheses -----)

Not sure what else to even do, The Adventurer simply collapses into a ball on the floor and starts sobbing, screaming, and rolling about. The hooded figure pauses in confusion at first, but.. apparently is not very sympathetic to his plight.

They rush over, grappling with him as he cries, fighting to pry the backpack out of his hands. The Adventurer continues screeching frantically, and during some of his flailing accidentally swings his arm up, elbowing the hooded figure in the face. They let out an exasperated sigh, knocking him against the wall then firmly yanking him up by the hair, securing their arm around his throat to restrain him as they grab for the backpack. He kicks a few times, struggling, clawing at the hooded figure's arms, but just isn't strong enough to free himself.. There's a thwack and a sudden sharpness in the side of his head, the backpack pulling away from his shoulders, cold ground, and then… nothing at all..…

(------------------- mild violence tw over -----------------) ...............

The Adventurer slowly opens his eyes to a quiet foggy morning.. Tiny particles in the dusty barn air gently flutter to and fro, dancing around in the streams of early sunlight trickling through the slight crack of the front doors. With a groan, he rolls over, suddenly feeling every ache in his body. His head, his wrist, his leg injury from crashing the raft.. He spends a while just laying on his back, watching the dust and gazing hopelessly at the moldy boards of the roof, mustering the strength to sit upright… What can he even do next? He's failed.. His first EVER actual quest of his adventuring career, and he can't even keep a stupid egg safe for more than a few days! What type of adventurer is that?? Maybe he should just give up.. Go back home and do nothing with his life, just as he was meant to... He sighs, turning back onto his side and curling into a ball to sulk even more dramatically. The cat trots over to him to interrupt his swirling thoughts, pawing at his face, then directing him towards a small stack of hay in the corner where... there it is! His backpack!! He scrambles over, immediately digging through to check for his belongings.. To his surprise, everything it still in it's place. His food, his money, all of the cool shiny rocks he's collected so far.. And tucked away in the very bottom, the Mysterious Egg box remains, completely undamaged.. somehow with the egg still inside! And... a note? He shakily unfolds a crisp sheet of pale yellow paper dotted with a few scribbly letters: "I took care of her for you. Be more careful next time. Just get where you have to go."

Well...... He supposes that if there's apparently going to be weirdos following him around anyway, maybe he's lucky at least one of them seems nice. Better than trying to ROB him, at least.. Even if it is a bit creepy. He realizes now that his injuries have been bandaged as well, and that when he woke up, he was wrapped in a blanket, and.. where is the hooded figure? What does the stranger mean that they "took care" of her?? He turns to the cat for answers, as if they'd be able to clear up his confusions, but they simply make a "mrrp!" noise and stare blankly in response. Figuring that it's all far too much to think about first thing in the morning (especially with the headache that he has), he just decides to be thankful he at least still has the egg, and thus can continue on his grand adventure!! He will NOT let himself fail again! Sore and limping but full of renewed motivation, he leaps up (at least as best he can) and continues back onto the road. After walking only a few hours, he comes to a clearing at the top of a large hill, overlooking the next stop on his journey (then double checks the map just to make sure it actually IS the next stop). This is a much bigger area than the previous villages he's been to, possibly large enough to even count as a small city. With a wider variation of shops and attractions available to him than usual, he wonders if he should just take a break and relax the rest of the day.

He's too tired to walk much today anyway, soo.. maybe it'd be good for him to spend some time in a safe public space, doing something to help take his mind off of this morning's drama… But, what should he do?

-

-

Additional Information

the adventurer's current main quest: follow his map to reach the abandoned castle ruins and see the rare animal specialist about the mysterious egg he has

[britomart]

sincerely no feeling like coming home and blasting music

[beefstrugglenoff]

Wew it's late but continyouing to mull about work things..