#gosh you are so fucking cool
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god i just cackled so loud that I startled both my cats awake, i've never heard this piece of dialogue before
#baldur's gate 3#minsc#minsc of rashemen#halsin#baldur's gate halsin#bg3 halsin#bg3 minsc#minsc and boo#how the fuck else do i tag this#i think you can see the genuine confusion in the way my cursor moves there#(i swear yall better be so cool about the outfit okay)#(also gosh iona is so pretty still)#(my pretty pretty pretty girl)#oc: iona raedir
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your favorite of my favorites: A Book Poll
okay, i have now officially seen Just Enough open tags to override my vampiric need to be explicitly invited into things, so! here are my (current) Five Favorite Books for y'all to vote on, in order of Publication Date (and incidentally the order in which i read them)
shout out to @e-b-reads and @beardedbookdragon for the recent open tags! i am inflicting this on paying this forward to @asexualbookbird and @alloreli (who i warned), and to @sixofravens-reads (who i did not).
#poll#book polls#favorite books#animorphs#ka applegate#ve schwab#vicious#this is how you lose the time war#Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone#network effect#martha wells#murderbot#leech#hiron ennes#dear ezloved and lizloved: >:D#dear steph: don't feel obligated lol#ABOUT THE BOOKS:#this was the second (2nd) animorphs book i ever read because they had it and no.2 at the used book store on LBI in NJ#but gosh it's just. so funny. and so memorable.#i love them all but this hit a bunch of buttons and i think most fondly of it#VICIOUS WRECKED ME I LOVE IT IT'S A PERFECT BOOK#(vengeful DNI but vicious is just. masterfully executed. holds up so well on a reread)#gosh what a great weaving of timelines and threading of backstory and history#10/10 no notes (except all the notes i took on dissecting the book itself)#gonna be real i'm surprised TIME WAR made the list but. i've reread it a shocking number of times too. AND it's one of the only books in--#--recent memory that licherally Inspired Me To Write My Own Book (affectionate). so on the list it goes#NETWORK EFFECT FUCKS ME UP EVERY TIME ALSO PERFECT AND I LOVE IT AND SO MANY HEART CRIMES#i've stayed up past my bedtime not just reading it for the first time but. rereading it the first AND second times after that. bot and ART<#and then leech wormed into my brain (ahahaha) and i'm SO excited to reread it#it does a ton of cool shit with POV and agency and gothic horror and it's horrifying and fucked up and i love it
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Ryuseitai decided to show up out of nowhere, end lives, and go about their merry way….
Actual image of me after watching this MV a hundred times 😂
I have said it before and I will continue to say it again because this remains a fact…..RYUSEITAI NEVER MISSES!!!!!
By the way, SO proud of Chiaki for powering through this MV despite all the spooky stuff that I’m sure is making his delicate heart tremble
#ensemble stars#chiaki morisawa#kanata shinkai#midori takamine#tetora nagumo#shinobu sengoku#director said take five but ryuseitai heard ‘change lives’#like holy fuck guys….my boys look and sound and dance sooooooooo good in this MV#also chiaki honey why are you turning on the charm to 1000?#please honey I’m a mere mortal lady my heart can only take so much#midori dances so energetically in this compared to old ryuseitai MVs I love it#and gosh tetora….he is at his best here from start to finish#kanata sounds extra good in this song his voice has a little more power#and shinobu sounds great and looks extra cute in those ears without sacrificing his coolness
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i miss my short hair era so bad :((((((((
#might do quick face reveal again i need that length again gosh ive never looked that cool i miss it so so badd you guys i looked soooo hot#:(((((( need to dye it fuck i need to get fifty times hotter<3333 it will fix all my problems im so serious<333
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hello its duck fancomic appreciation time bc I love them, I just wanted to say my favourite is Deep Water! it's just so elegantly drawn and you made the plot such a great explanation of how Gladstone's luck works :D also you actually nailed the ABC emergency technique and that knocked me sideways (used to be a lifeboat volunteer) so YEAH REALLY GOOD THANKS FOR THE GOOD FOOD
oh gosh!!!! ;O; !!!! actually that one is one of my favs too! I still feel satisfied with it, and I'm really amazed and happy you approve so much of the ABC I did my best to draw and write that part carefully. fun fact when I was in my teens I became a 3 star kayaker and also a qualified bellboat instructor thanks to the Rangers, so yeah! yay!!!! wooo!
#wawawawa ;o;#what a nice start to my working week#gosh.......#duck comics#doodle comics#ALSO THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE#LIFEBOAT PEOPLE ARE SO FUCKING COOL#oops typo of a lifetime there I MEANT 3 STAR#4 STAR IS LIKE. INSANE LEVEL I AIN'T THAT
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screaming crying yelling my prof being like 'have any of you written fictional stories before' as i have my messy breakup masadai fic open in another tab
#snap chats#//THROWS UP//#ITS THE WAY HE WAS LIKE 'oh can you talk about your process :) do the characters live in your head do you hear them'#and im just sitting here like absentmindedly talking like#'oh yeah i guess they do haha uh like whenever i write something 'they wouldnt do' i hear them say 'i wouldnt do that''#which is true whenever i go to write one of these fucks doing something and its not right i hear a bitch in my ear like#'i woudlnt fucking say that' like youre so right my queen im sorry let me reread the text fifty times to get it right#ITS HOW HE GOT SO ENTHUSIASTIC TOO LIKE 'oh my gosh really :00 isnt that so fun isnt that cool :DD'#if it werent for the fact i can perfectly hear will yun lee in my head at any given time then sure i guess#anyway my professor doesnt understand the depths of my mental illness but im glad fanfic writing has become relevant to my academic career
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Everything is nice and all at work then suddenly someone feels the need to remind you why you hate your workplace so much agshshdhs
#Girl I thought we stopped with the bullshit#If I hear someone say 'just wait until you have your own kid' ONE MORE TIME#I actually have a cool job and all. I love what am I doing#But gosh my coworkers are not it sometimes#They took away the guy around my age too now I'm stuck with all the married people with +2 kids of which one is little and killing them on#the inside.#I love when someone's like 'Why don't you work on Saturday too? You don't have kids/family to worry about' 🙃#And I will keep not having them if I come to work every fucking weekend Karen but fuck off I guess#god i'm so tired#And sick of the whole situation. My aromantic ass is dying slowly#One day I'm gonna snap and yell at everyone I don't wanna have children and have them interrogate me for ages
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WOY character reactions to you coming out as bisexual
"WAIT YOU CAN BE A BOY AND LIKE OTHER BOYS????"
"ew bro, dudes can't like other dudes."
"oh shit!"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP! I DIDNT ASK!"
""
"yes i know i can see the pin on your clothes"
"LMAOOOO ANOTHER LAME-ASS MEMBER OF THE ALPHABET COMMUNITY LAWWWWLLL"
#i wouldve added wander but it would be too goddamn long too type out and its 1 am. just know he would be VERY supportive and try to give#you all the resources. ever.#sylvia would just say oh cool im gay too#wander would say that too but like OH MY GOSH SO AM I and fucking RAMBLE#woy#wander over yonder#THE BABY IS THE FUNNIEST ONE TO ME
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For the writer ask game, #4, #23, #25?
4. How many WIPs do you have right now?
Technically, just one! All the little sidefics I've started are currently wrapped up and complete (tho there's more I wanna do still) so TMWN is the only WIP!
23. How do you choose where to end a chapter (if you have multi-chapter works)?
Oh lord. Shrug emoji. IDK, just where it... feels good! Like it feels like things have been wrapped up and we're at a good settling point! I do like cliffhangers, but I usually try not to leave anything too crazy as an unknown for a week, either. Sometimes I end a chapter because I realize I've written like almost thirty pages and I should probably figure out a stopping point and split things up, lmao. Chapter Twenty and Twenty-One were originally one chapter, but then I realized it was, like... almost fifty pages... so I went back and found a good place to split it up, lmao.
25. Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing?
Oh yeah. For sure. Sometimes I'll, like... tap into something sad by accident. Like, I'll be writing something sad/emotional/upsetting, and then I'll think about it too hard and get really upset (usually it's less something I've experienced and more something that someone else has experienced. Like. There've been times I've written about Yoshi being scared about his children's safety, and then thought about my mom losing her son, and then I'll suddenly be really fucked up about it.) I also have a tendency of, like... giving the TMWN boys things I don't have? Like. A lot of their experiences, especially childhood memories and aspects of their relationships, are things that I wish I had. I am, quite frankly, not close with any of my living family members. Part of the story, for me, is giving them the stuff I want but never got and will likely never have. And then sometimes I'll get kind of sad about it? But usually, it's okay. I like giving them good things. <3
#im like#you know how idiot-mushroom and tm(n)t take their kinda fucked up childhoods#and process it by kicking fantasy turtles?#which is so valid and cool#i take my kinda fucked up childhood and i process it by giving these turtles everything i didnt get#like a good relationship with their parent#like! dont get me wrong my childhood was not. like. AWFUL or anything but the one thing ive learned so far in therapy is#well gosh it maybe wasnt. good either lmao#sometimes ill just be sayin shit and my therapist will squint at me lmao#tho i do put actual memories and experiences in there too#aslitheryprinx#asks#ask games
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every scene with aveline in da2 is like oh wow aveline woudl be so fucking cool. if we explored this in deep. wouldnt it
#replaying da2#its just.... im playing a rivalry with her wich is pretty cool#beginning with my hawke killing her husband in a “it would be awful for a wife to kill his beloved let me do it instead”#in a well intentional fucked up way#and then they just disagreeing on stuff#(i love the idea of rivalry paths but sometimes u have to be a huge asshole so i tried to do the rivalry without being full jerk to her dfo#anyways its pretty cool you can also blame her for what happens in All That Remains#its a cool moment i love that they let you just be angry even if its just for the sake of being angry#but gosh she acts like It Couldnt Be Avoided in Any Way hawke ú_ù girl you are the leader of the guard#at least i dont know tell me things are gonna improve dfggdfdgfji#tbf her idea of improvement would be like. yeah we should support the templars more#i also went with her to the fade so she could get a bit of understandment about the mages#and she was just like wow mages are not people . like girlllll#learn from isabela and varric pls#its like she doubles down on the awful#wich could be cool and interesting but it just goes nowhere#and then again the qunari getting 2 elves problem like girllll whats going on in the guard#it would had been nice to see her deal with these with like a Feeling IDK or a narrative not like. well she is there#i saw someone talking about how isabela merrill and fenris can end up so badly depending on players choice#while aveline worst outcome is that she doesnt get remarried#and like idk man da2 is this huge tragedy everyone is having a terrible time#she has the worst time at the beginning but then thats it#like the material IS THERE
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hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery
#starlight personal#it’s very bizarre to have my life going objectively well - work is good! personal life is good! family is good!#and still be very mentally ill and feel like I’m faking it even though I know damn well I ain’t scream-sobbing every couple of days alone in#my apartment for attention because What Attention??? my cat????? Bug is never moved by my tears she cares only for string and wires#like I know that cannabis has been immensely helpful to getting me to fucking sleep on a regular schedule and that’s integral to -#my functioning and I know that having emergency klonopin in the event of a total breakout is helpful#and I KNOW that my PMDD and depression and anxiety are very treatment resistant and ketamine is the only thing that’s provided any -#meaningful relief and logically I know I’m not abusing any of these#I’m getting a promotion at work I still go out to see friends regularly I have hobbies I have a girlfriend (??? Wild right)#like clearly these things are working because i’m better now than i was for years leading up to now#SO LIKE. DON’T STOP USING THE THINGS THAT HELP. LOGICALLY THIS MEANS THESE ARE GOOD FOR ME#I always roll my eyes when ppl go off their meds b/c they’re feeling better like babes that’s what the meds are meant to do#if you stop taking them you stop feeling better - but it’s REALLY HARD to get past the cultural conditioning#the feeling that ‘but I can white knuckle my way through this I can force myself to live without’ like WHY BITCH#WE DON’T HAVE TO LIVE WITHOUT#AND ALSO. WE’RE STILL GENERALLY MISERABLE BRO. EVEN WITH OUR LIFE IN A BETTER PLACE!!!#DO YOU NOT THINK THIS MEANS THAT WE SHOULD USE WHAT WE KNOW WORKS TO BE LESS MISERABLE#basically it’s really hard to not feel like a loser when the only things that help are ‘fun’ drugs like weed and psychedelics#I feel like I’m being a hedonistic reprobate which 1) is actually kinda cool now that I wrote it out#2) @ myself were not a good enough liar-faker that every medical professional we see wouldn’t pick up on that if that was our motivation#time to remind myself that it’s arrogant to think I could trick many trained professionals without actively trying tbh#that generally helps me get out of my self-pitying ‘ohhhhh I’m awful and lazy and bad and abusing substances’ spiral#to be very mentally ill on main it is weirdly reassuring to be like ‘just as my fanon interpretation of obi wan kinda hates himself but is -#practical enough to take care of himself even when it makes him cringe and want to scratch his face off; I too am aware that self-care is -#radical and punk and In Fact Necessary to beat back the dark and live in the light with hope so yes even though I doubt and -#feel squiggly and guilty about it I’m not going to NOT prioritize my health and well-being b/c self-hatred and self-denial benefits no one’#thank you inner obi wan i love projecting my issues onto you mwah mwah mwah smooches for my favorite boy!!!!!#and smooches for me I’m going to be proud of myself gosh darn it even if I have to fake it at first#see I wouldn’t be able to be nice to myself like this if I hadn’t been doing ketamine treatment for a year IT WORKS BRO KEEP IT UP#SCHEDULE THE DAMN APPOINTMENT AND CLEAN YOUR BONG
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The night is young and I am free to do whatever my heart desires but unfortunately I have once again found myself trapped in the Time Prison and so I
#the good old 'I don't feel like doing anything including doing nothing and I want to go to bed but I know I'm not tired'#WEH.#I'm enjoying typing but I don't want to commit to practicing typing for real so I'm just making excuses to type more#I was looking at custom ESC keycaps because I was thinking about that whole community of ppl obsessed with keyboards and like I get it I#like the clicky clacking and keyboards can look so pretty but some of those key caps man wtf.#why would you want 3D transparent donald duck ESC key from temu what is wrong with you#saw a set of key caps that were little kittys with little kitty ears n I was like fuuuuuuuuuck#49.00 USD probably 100000 CAD+shipping goto helllll#I was thinking about what if I had like confetti keycaps and a custom kittycake esc key or like an actual little cake and matching desk mat#or even just a new cute mousepad cuz mine is old as fuck and I spilled vegetable cream stew on it once#and then I was thinking like sighhh and wouldn't it be cool to have arcade carpet on the stairs leading down to my basement hovel and#rainbow lights along the ceiling corners and what if I painting my bedroom like I wanted to do and sighhhhh#I haven't been wasting my money buying shit like that but I'm thinking about it again.#but the same thing stopping me from doing anything at all is stopping me from wasting my money which like that's good I guess???????#gosh I really like typing why did I stop doing daily typing practice#oh yea The Thing Stopping Me From Doing Anything At All#meow meowm meow meow meow#ok I really gotta tear myself away from my computer and brush my teethses and try going to bed#I already played minecraft earlier it's fine I didn't do NOTHING tonight it just feels like I did#and tomorrow is another day#and next week is a short work week thank fucking christ almighty#literally cuz its easter sunday and he was in that tomb but he escaped or whatever he did#thanks jeezy boy#you maybe shoulda milked it for like half a week at least#moved the big ass boulder like have an inch at a time#*pause for laughter*#that s from my new stand up comedy routine do uiuop like it djfskll;askjdgflksjdflksajdflksjdf the dsjalkjfolidasfgjoiweljsdalkjflskdjflak#meowww#I am the only one I know on here who 'talks' this fucking much about absolutely nothing#I do all this and my poor followers can click read more and spend time reading alllllll this garbage
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❄️me finally leaving a toxic/abusive relationship after a year and 7 months.
❄️ This is literally a win for me. JUST LOOK AT THE TAGS LOL. Feminism is gonna shine in a new way for me now, I’m gonna get in a non profit to support against psychological and emotional abuse or sth.
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ALSO @werewolf-mp3
my sideblog hedgie (now novelcracker) with all the translation tips and all it was me lol
SORRY FOR DRAGGING YOU IN I’M JUST SO HAPPY AAAAAAAAH
sorry sorry just ignore it
#the little brat always cancelled last minute in important things ugh#this is literally the best thing that has ever happened to me#his whole family was toxic AF#fuck everything fuck it all IM SINGLE SOON#the picture of Dorian gray and Henry wotton’s fragment about marriage literally saved my ass#IT’S SLUTSTATION BITCH GET IN#NOW I CAN DO ALL I WANT#I DON’T HAVE TO GIVE NO EXPLANATION WOHOO#I DON’T HATE ANYONE IM SO HAPPY I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT THE FUCK ALONE#gosh I’m so fucking happy and free I feel like I’ve won a goddamn lottery#I AM NOT ALONE I’M WITH MYSELF AND THAT’S SO COOL!!!!#that lil brat can waste his whole life if he wants to so badly YOU CAN’T DRAG ME DOWN WITH YOU#I am so individualistic now that my old self feels sooooo colddd ❄️❄️❄️☃️⛄️
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I’m out of town for a couple of days for my brother’s chess tournament and the internet in this hotel sucks butts and I only brought one book with me 😓
#sucks butts IN A BAD WAY#this is the same hotel that held the last couple of big chess tournaments my brother entered#so I’ve been here a few times but this is the first time I’m actually renting a room instead of driving back and forth each day#so positive: got a room and don’t have to drive a bunch. negative: no continental breakfast 😒#they have a little tiny starbucks but no free breakfast which is bullshit!#also all of my books are stilled packed up from moving bc I’m lazy so I couldn’t grabbed any one I really wanted to read#but I did get a free copy of Stephen King’s ‘On Writing’ the other day so I brought that#and yeah I am kinda pumped to peruse that. Mr King is a pretty cool dude and I def want his writing tips#but also… I just kinda would rather read something about a fucked up wizard or something ya know?#anyway I always feel weird or annoying saying this but if you want to send me any asks or anything to help pass my time then by all means#or not. it’s cool. really. I hate bugging people and I hate coming off as desperate & needy outside of the bedroom#im going to be mushy and say im kind of excited to spend the night sleepover style with my little bro here#he’s getting older and it’s getting harder to convince him to hang out with me#love this little dude so gosh darn much#oh man what if we get a pizza and watch a movie together? would that be cool? is that something teenagers like to do with their older bros?#i’m so lame#being like 18 years older than your younger brother means you get to fulfill your cool uncle/dad vibes without actually having kids#ok I have to stop myself from filling this with tags about wishing I was a dad or being whatever#what was I saying before?… did I even have a point?#oh yeah… bad internet… only one book… I’m hungry… yeah…#this isn’t important#you can ignore this#text
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personally i don’t think anything should cost money. if it were up to me, we’d star trek this shit up and do away with that needless cause of so much suffering
however. bare min? we should at least make it so things that humans (and animals) literally need to live? that should be free. so that would be: food, water, medicine, housing, and the means for temperature control
those five things, at the very least, should be an undeniable right to all living beings. the fact that so many people can’t wrap their minds around that baffles me. and tells me my dream of No Money is a long way away
#sigh#''but people have to EARN these things!'' you're sick and demented#why should a person have to earn being alive#''but resources!'' we no longer live in a time when any of these things are rare#we don't HAVE to make the tough choices about who lives or dies gosh damn it#there is enough food and water and housing. the idea that there isn't is a fucking lie#to keep the rich cunts in power#they want us to think food is rare#''but some people don't deserve food'' 1. ur evil and 2. it's not a matter of deserving#fact of the matter is people literally have to eat and drink and be warm#we DIE without those things. and fun fact: living organisms tend to wanna avoid death#so starvation is such a painful way to die. fuck you#i was talking with my friend the other way and something obvious came to mind:#and that's ''gosh damn humans have to eat a lot. we gotta do that every day. multiple times. it's such a constant thing''#and i didn't mean that in a bad way. i was just musing. Bitches Gotta Eat#sure you CAN go days without eating but you fucking shouldn't#i'm annoyed#i'm so annoyed by capitalism and money and i yearn for star trek :(#oh also entertainment and art and creative expression are totally human needs too. like we'd go insane without them#but i was going for the basic physical needs. sustenance. means to correct aliments. a home base for living. warmth or coolness#like. the You'd Die Without It needs
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IS THAT THE THE S THE DBSH GGSAAHSSS.D.....,.,SHSHGDJDHDGHHHBZS?!?!????????MSJSHHSDGGDGSGSHAHAHGZGSHAHAGSFSGSGSGSGSGSHHAGMDHDHDJDJDJDJ
SHSHSJSHS???????
just class doodles for today :>
#IM#ME WHEN#HUH#WHTA#WHAT#OH MY GOD#NO BECAUSE#ALL YOUR ART IS ABSOLUTELY STUNNING AND IM IN LOVE WITH IT AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY#GUYS WHAT DO I SAY#“this looks cool as fuck actually” canon#thats the reason he felt comfortable enough to sleep#ive decided#GOSH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I HAVE NO WORDS ITS SO NICE OF YOU#AUFHHFGHH#REBLOG BLAST#3 months au fanart
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