#good person clashes with wanting respect and approval from your mother but also knowing she’s a horrible monster

[clementinetalkshow]

i cannot engage with anything mel related I’ll get mad. Not because I hate her but because I love her but everything arcane sets up about her sets her up to be my fav and they do Nothing with it

[rairii]

dumbassrights replied to your post “After the election fraud that happened in Bolivia was uncovered and...”

hey! are you bolivian? can you explain bolivians situation right now? everything i see is outsiders opinions and i know that i can't really trust that. if you can't, thats fine, thank you!

Hello! Yes I am Bolivian, though I currently live in a different South American country, but I’ve been keeping in touch with my family with WhatsApp and I try to keep up with the basic news from back home, so I think I can explain the basics.

The basic start is with Evo Morales, a cocalero (coca leaf grower) who became a politician and came to power as president in 2006. He’s the first indigenous president of Bolivia (he is Aymara), and when he came to power was widely seen as a game changer, destroying the oligarchical, upper white class hold on Bolivian politics. He was received with much fanfare, including from white leftists, who were keen on a president who would enact social reform and change and concentrate on helping reduce poverty and racism. I was too young to vote back then, but the majority of my family voted for Evo. He was... he was hope. It’s hard to explain. We thought it was the turning point. Finally, an indigenous president, someone who knew discrimination first hand and would be able to listen to the many indigenous peoples of our country. Someone who would fight imperialism, and the scars of colonialism.

He managed to do some good things. If I remember correctly, education spending and welfare spending increased, he increased the taxes on many companies, such as hydrocarbons, allowing the state to invest more and have less of a deficit. Bolivia also received an economic boom unrelated to his actions and policies (it had more to do with the price of minerals, since Bolivia is a mining country, and so on and so forth), so for a while poverty did reduce and the middle class grew. He also increased the number of indigenous and campesino (farmer/rural lands) representatives and their influence in politics.

However, as time went on, Evo’s party began to systematically remove any opposition they could, with many political leaders jailed for charges of tax evasion and the like. There is a lot of shady stuff going around that topic, and it’s too much to get into in a short explanation. It turned out that the party sought to remove any rising leadership, even within their party, that could threaten Evo’s dominance. His party also began to stack the legislative branch and pushing new judges through, setting up people who’d be grateful to him and thus legislate in his favor. While this was happening, MAS, the party’s social base, expanded their power and influence in other ways.

Now, the actual constitutional fuckery that angered a lot of leftists. He had the constitution rewritten in 2008 and it was approved in 2009, which had really mixed opinions from people, though I personally liked that he changed the name of “Republic of Bolivia” to “Plurinational State of Bolivia” to recognize the indigenous nations of Bolivia. The constitution maintained its two term limit for the presidency, but the thing was, he claimed that since there was a new constitution, his first mandate/government no longer counted, and he got it approved legally that he could run two more times again, which he did. Which like. What the fuck?

In the process, we began seeing cracks in his pro-indigenous, pro-environmental discourse. For example, he ignored and overulled the indigenous peoples of TIPNIS, a national park and indigenous territory, when they legally stated that they did not want a highway built through their lands, because it would bring in deforestation and cocaleros who are known for deforestation. He basically steamrollered over this, despite indigenous peoples of the TIPNIS walking all the way to the city of La Paz to make protests. He began to approve infrastructure projects that would destroy natural spaces, including hydroelectric dams that can and will flood Madidi, one of the most important national parks and biodeverse areas of Bolivia. And so on and so forth, he began to act in such a way that was at odds with the platform he ran, betraying indigenous peoples and Pachamama (mother earth) at every turn. He also never took any reasonable criticism in stride, blaming it all on American Imperialism.

However, because of MAS’ stronghold and no unity among the opposition, Evo ran two more terms after his first (including the third which really shouldn’t have been legally recognized), and he stated that after his third he wouldn’t stay in power.

If you guessed that he changed his mind or was lying, you’re right.

He called for a national referendum in 2016 for whether he should be allowed to run for a fourth term, but he lost the referendum, which voted “No”, though it was a narrow margin. And instead of respecting the will of the Bolivian people, he ignored it and pushed himself forward as a candidate for the next (these) elections, to the point that he pushed so that the Supreme Tribunal of Justice would rule that the constitution was inconstitutional (wtf) because it did not respect his right to reelection (wtf) and decided that no public office would have a term limit. I hope I don’t have to explain why that is just. A horrible decision for democracy. Term limits exist for a reason. It’s so no one person can get a stranglehold on power. After this it became clear to us that he had become enamoured with power, and was mainly seeking to establish himself in power indefinitely, which well, it pissed a lot of us off. It was heartbreaking too. To see someone we’d pinned our hopes on becoming... a dictator.

This finally brings us to three weeks ago, when the general elections were held. Now, in Bolivia, we have it so that any winner of the presidential elections has to have at least 10% points more than the guy in second place, or we go into a second round of elections between the higher scoring candidates. And as the official electoral authority reported throughout most of the counting process as results came in, Evo didn’t have the 10% lead needed to avoid a second round, and statistically even if the remaining votes were majority Evo, he wouldn’t be able to get the 10% needed. Also, the remaining votes were City votes, and the cities are in general, not Evo supporters anymore. Until at around 80% of all votes counted, the website and reporting of the electoral authority just. Stopped. It cut off. It cut off for 24 hours, during which the government first claimed that oh, it’d had some technical difficulties, and then (this part I actually don’t understand, so I’m paraphrasing what I maybe undersood) claimed that because some voting places had finished counting already, so they wouldn’t have two places reporting results, they stopped the main authority. Which like.

That’s really fucking fishy.

So people were really suspicious, and when the authority began reporting again those 24 hours later, reporting that oh, actually, Evo had won with the required 10%, a lot of people didn’t believe it. This smelled like electoral fraud. So people began gathering to protest because Evo shouldn’t have been running in the first place and now he wanted us to take this lie and swallow it.

Evidence came out over the next few days about electoral fraud: non-Evo vote ballots were found in trash bins, and the official databases of the electoral authority were found to have “irregularities” that all favoured Evo. People got pissed even as Evo claimed that it was imperialist forces and that the counts were all valid and legit and transparent. But the damage was done. Bolivians took to the streets in big numbers to protest and froze the cities, stopping transport and literally putting the cities in a standstill, only letting emergency services and food trucks coming to the supermarkets through so people could live. The protesters in the cities began to get threats, because Evo began trying to sell these protests as “the racist cities trying to stamp the rural vote”, from Evo supporters, that they’d shut the water supplies to the city off. Counter protesters began massing too. Clashes happened. Evo supporters were pushed out of the city of Cochabamba, but they set fire to the grasses around a city landmark and place of pride because they wanted to give a last fuck you. MAS supporters attacked hospitals that had protesters and even the doctors and nurses who weren’t supporting MAS. Photo and video evidence, and people coming forward, showed that the government was paying people to counter protest. The protesters were mostly non-violent, but there were clashes when the police wasn’t able to keep people separated. One mayor near Cochabamba was found to have paid two thugs to beat up protesters, to the point that one young man of 18ish was thought to be dead, and her hair was cut off and she was sprayed red - supposedly by protesters, but now there are cliams of people from her town that it was her own people that did it to make the protesters look bad. (My opinion? It could be either at this point, I don’t know). The protesters wore the Bolivian flag and called for democracy to be respected. The Evo supporters primarily wore the party flag, and got their hands on dynamite that they set off on streets to intimidate protesters. Protesters have died at the hands of Evo supporters - I haven’t heard of one case of dead Evo supporters. The police started to get unhappy, because they didn’t want to throw tear gas at the people protesting. To try and sweeten them, the goverment paid a bonus... but it turned out the bonus money was taken from the police officer’s pension. Police departments began to ... not sure if mutiny is the right word, but to defy the government, in several cities.

At first, people were pushing for a second round of elections, but when we realized that actually, legally, when there is fraud of a significant impact the elections have to be annuled and new ones held, and the people who did the fraud jailed, the movements began to call for new elections completely, with a new electoral authority that could be trusted.

In the meantime, the military was quiet and not sent out to repress anything even after the police began to rebel, with military subordinates presenting letters that they would not repress the people, while it was known that military high command is pro Evo.

While this was going on, the OEA, The Organization of American States, had issued from the start of the 24 hour blackout from the electoral authority that they had concerns about the election process. Evo ended up accepting an audit from OEA representatives, and said that he’d stand by their resolution. When they finally came out with a report saying there were serious irregularities in the election that cast it into doubt, he called it politically motivated, but did call for new elections...

Then the high commander of the military said Evo should resign so that the country can be peaceful again. And a few hours ago Evo presented his resignation to the presidency.

It’s not over by a long shot - we need to establish a transparent, trustworthy electoral process in record time and hold new elections, and people are afraid that Evo will take back his resignation, and Evo incited his supporters in his resignation speech - but we’ve managed to get this far after three weeks of non spot protests.

There’s a lot more going on, a lot of context I’ve skipped, on Evo, on the political opposition - including Camacho, a religious right wing religionalism whose gotten a worrying amount of support with the protests in reaction to Evo’s excesses - but so far, I am proud of Bolivia. We’ve not let a wanna-be dictator establish himself. Now we just need a good left wing leader to help build us up to the promise that Evo gave us, and to stand strong against right wing pendulum reactionaries.

I leave you with the protest chants that spread in Bolivia these past three weeks

Quien se cansa? Who gets tired? NADIES SE CANSA! NOBODY GETS TIRED! Quien se rinde? Who gives up? NADIES SE RINDE! NOBODY GIVES UP! Evo de nuevo? Evo again? HUEVO CARAJO! [Pun involving the word egg, which sounds like Evo, and a swear word that doesn’t have a translation]

[dantesinfcrno]

                                 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

                                                (  @opalsmedia​​  )  

    ›   𝑰. ACE OF CUPS .

❝  divine love and compassion are pouring through you. you are a vessel for deep, spiritual love from the universe, and you can’t help but let that love flow through you and into the world. you are love  &  your heart overflows .  ❞

           𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐋  ––––––  the days grow darker than you’ve expected, and that harms the sweet thing you call a heart. the numerous fights, the copious amounts of tension, and the stress that pools in your stomach –– you’re certain you can’t handle it any longer. perhaps, you are too soft for this world in which anger  &  chaos reign. you try and shield yourself, but it’s never enough : your heart still beats so strongly, and you can’t stop giving  &  giving, until you’re alone with the remains of your chest. you weren’t expecting a ruthless emerald to open his arms to you, and yet–– in him, you discover at least one safe spot, tucked away from the world  &  all things evil. he reminds you of a book you loved as a child, and he has a nice way with words –– it makes dreaming easier, in such harsh times, and you can smile when he is around. he does not ask anything from you. you are grateful. 

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  braver soldier, russian red  +  i like me better, lauv  +  boats  &  birds, gregory and the hawk.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  laughter that fills our lungs ; smiling until our cheeks ache  &  our bellies are warm ; yellow and orange shades peppered across your skin ; the summer bringing out your freckles. we find secret gardens  &  have picnics, us and the fairies. childhood is still very reminiscent in the way we lay down and embrace one another. we speak of running away, but instead just end up with more polaroids on our desks. i prefer your sweater much more than my own. cozy blankets ; soft intimacy ; rose-colored glasses.

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  on empathy : what it sounds like is a bird breaking small bones against glass .  ❞

   ›   𝑰𝑰. THE HIGH PRIESTESS .

❝  the guardian of the subconscious mind and the teacher of sacred knowledge and hidden mysteries. she ushers you through the thin veil of awareness, offering you a deep, intuitive understanding of the universe and a heightened awareness of secret or hidden information .  ❞

           𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐋  ––––––  you are a very distant cousin, maybe not even that. you grew up hearing tales of dante’s mother, and you are keenly aware of the distaste your family has for her, her husband, and her son. you’ve seen each other once or twice, but you know dante desai –– all the rumors, scandals, absurdities  &  controversies. he might not have given you a word, but your image of the emerald with a dazzling smile has darkened under the influence of gossip and ill-intentioned people. you are not sure why he’s in the society at all and, if you’re being candid, he doesn’t seem deserving of any of your respect –– but alas, business means business, so you try and play nice ( it fails, more often than not, as he seems to know every word uttered about himself in his absence ). he teases you, and pushes you to try harder, reach farther. it annoys you deeply, and you hold back from simply telling him to shut up. maybe you want to prove you’re so much better, maybe you want to make him aware of how much he’s missing. maybe you just want the approval of someone, anyone.

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  black sheep, gin wigmore  +  hit me with your best shot, adona  +  make me your queen, declan mckenna.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  misplaced competitiveness  &  rivalry ; wanting to prove yourself ; defiant words and poignant stares ; discovering the truth isn’t always hand-fed ; accepting the lies you were told when growing up  &  moving on from them ; familial resentment ; finding things in common with someone you hate ; learning you share many scars with the object of your disdain. biting remarks  &  vicious tongue ; clashing of titans. finding an equal match to the monster that crawls under your skin. enemies to friends.

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  the monster. the dreamer, the eater. the eater monster. you the monster, i the monster. all of us the monster. the monster in us, the monster in you. the monster in all of us .  ❞ 

   ›   𝑽. THE HIEROPHANT, ꓤƎꓥƎꓤSƎꓷ .

❝  you are your own teacher. all the wisdom you seek comes from within – not from some external source or power. the hierophant reversed is also about challenging the status quo. you seek out opportunities to rebel and reclaim your personal power .  ❞

           𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐋  ––––––  you’ve always had your eyes on dante, it seems –– it’s not at all too hard for it to happen, considering the bright glitter  &  colorful clothes, but you perhaps admire him more than your peers. individuality attracts you, and you may or may not have one silly crush on this man –– however, once you came closer, an infatuation turned into a solid bond. you seem to share similar principles, and the need for freedom  &  change is rooted deeply in both of your cores. you can speak for hours on end about everything at all, open-mindedness not shared with many others you’ve met. everyone might be worried once the two of you are seen together, as you’re always up for some trouble –– but, maybe, that’s just how love works in this friendship. fire burns brighter as you come together as an unit, and it almost makes you giddy.

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  void, the neighbourhood  +  come as you are, nirvana  +  sober ii (melodrama), lorde.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  forbidden crushes ; midnight escapades ; i know your favorite wine  &  you know how many drinks it takes for me to get tipsy ; we know each other at our worsts. the act of loving  &  supporting each other in all one sets their mind to. may be guilty of arson  &  invasion of properties. the lack of hesitation to defend one another. uniqueness  &  playfulness ; deep conversations under the moonlight ; sharing the same fears we never uttered aloud ; feeling trapped under the same pretense of freedom ; watching clouds  &  constellations ; staying awake until seven am to see the sun rise.

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  wings are freedom only if they are open in flight. on one’s back they are a heavy weight .  ❞ 

  ›   𝑽𝑰𝑰𝑰. JUSTICE .

❝  represents justice, fairness, truth and the law. you are being called to account for your actions and will be judged accordingly. as you explore your truth, you will discover that things are not as clear-cut as you had thought .  ❞ 

          𝐎𝐏𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘  ––––––  admitting to his past relationship with his own predecessor put a huge toll on dante’s shoulders, and you now observe him with more care, an attention you never truly bestowed upon the trickster of your circlet. his distress might tug at your heartstrings, it might make you wonder –– you might see him differently, now. your relationship might be strained. perhaps, you desire to reach out, offer the support he never asked for. perhaps, you do not know how. you are curious and worried, but the feelings of betrayal still linger on your bloodstream, whether you like it or not. should you ask for clarifications? step further into his personal space? should you step back, abstain from commenting anything? does he need your help? does he even care about what you think?

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  you don’t know me at all, son lux  +  stop crying your heart out, oasis  +  all for us, labrinth  &  zendaya.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  lingering stares across the room ; desiring to speak but now knowing how ; sending text messages but not wanting to read the replies ; sheepish smiles  &  shared silences ; holding back your tears, even while near loved ones ; solitary nights with clouds covering every star. i worry for you, dear one, but you make it so hard to take care of you. when it rains, we hold each other’s hands. you taste sour, i taste bittersweet, but we still love. i would do it all for you, why won’t you ask for it?

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine .  ❞

   ›   𝑿𝑽. THE DEVIL, ꓤƎꓥƎꓤSƎꓷ .

❝  calls on you to confront your inner fears to free yourself from the chains that bind you to your limiting beliefs and unhealthy attachments. it can also appear when you are going into your deepest, darkest places. you seek to understand your innermost shadows so you can either release them or integrate them into your life in a more constructive way .  ❞

           𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐋  ––––––  you struggle, and you struggle hard. you would never admit you’re going through a heavy time, perhaps not even to yourself. you move lightly, with grace, and no one questions the tightness of your smile. it’s easy, like this –– except you’re tired, and your bones ache, and you can barely sleep at night. it surprises you, however, once you find the bright emerald drinking by himself in one of the shitty bars you go whenever life gets rough. you sit by his side, you both share a sigh  &  a shot. he finds out one of your many secrets, and you discover some of his scars, and the pills on his pocket. you hold his hand, and he takes you home safely, kisses your forehead while bidding you good night. you share many text messages, and you meet up often. you get better at recognizing the signs of sadness on each other’s faces. life is not any happier, but now, at least–– you have an emergency contact. you can sob on his shoulders until you fall into unconsciousness. he smiles at you in the morning and brings you coffee. no more words are needed.

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  shadows, warpaint  +  blinding, florence and the machine  +  haunt, banks.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  blue shades ; melancholy ; van gogh’s paintings ; scars that never fade away ; the dull ache of quiet piano strings echoing throughout an empty room at the darkest hour. inebriated confessions ; hushed conversations ; many bottles of whiskey, both cheap  &  incredibly expensive. not knowing much about each other, and yet discovering the hidden away pieces by yourself. becoming dependent on the emotion of being understood  &  seen. helping each other up and forward, even when there is no strength left. exhausted  &  broken smiles ; thunderstorms ; lending you my jacket and never getting it back, because you need as much comfort as you can get ; dancing in the rain  &  laughing about it hard and loud.

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  i have no more room for grief for it is everywhere now .  ❞

   ›   𝑿𝑽𝑰𝑰. THE STAR, ꓤƎꓥƎꓤSƎꓷ .

❝  can mean that you’ve lost faith and hope. you may be desperately calling out to the universe to give you some reprieve but struggling to see how the divine is on your side. take a moment to ask yourself what the deeper life lesson is, and how this is a blessing, not a punishment. the reversed star is a test of faith .  ❞

          𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘  ––––––  the opal society, more than ever, seems like bullshit to you. you are angry, upset, distraught–– you can think of many words that echo your insatisfaction, and this initiation process no longer looks like something you want to be a part of. life is a burden heavy enough without a secret society wrapped in the mayhem of horny young adults tying you to statues. you definitely didn’t expect for dante, of all people, to become a guiding light –– the one that took his own initiation as a joke, broke the rules, and is known for frequently getting in trouble? how the fuck could that guy give you answers? truth be told, he doesn’t –– nothing is ever easy with him, it seems, and no surface-level impression seems to make him justice. the both of you now speak frequently, and he helps you stabilize your thoughts –– the guy can manage to give out some decent advice, at least, and you might even trust him, now. he likes pros  &  cons lists, and also vaguely pointing at the light at the end of the tunnel, just enough so it will fill you with hope. it is enough, for now.

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  i need some sleep, eels  +  i’ll die anyway, girl in red  +  i found, amber run.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  an unexpected discovery ; knowledge where you thought least possible to find. the trade of fears  &  unsure confessions ; gentle parental guidance into the shoes meant for you to fit. tender reassurances over the phone ; a pat on the back ; a small gift that means “ i am proud of you ”. rediscovering the love for one’s circlet through the eyes of another. silent promises ; candles  &  wishes you never shared before ; feeling as if you’ve known someone from your past lives  &  forever carrying them in your heart.

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  you are in conflict with yourself. you are holding yourself in check. you are paralyzing yourself .  ❞ 

   ›   𝑿𝑰𝑿. THE SUN, ꓤƎꓥƎꓤSƎꓷ .

❝  is calling to your inner child to come out and play. see it as your permission slip to leave behind your responsibilities, even just for a moment, and play. you may have experienced setbacks that damaged your enthusiasm and optimism and perhaps led you to question whether you can achieve what you set out to do .  ❞

           𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐋  ––––––  dante is a disappointment to you. he let you down or hurt your feelings, and you can’t forgive him for that ( and you won’t even try, because he doesn’t deserve it ). there are plenty of good memories attached to his name, but it all has turned sour, and you want to watch it crash  &  burn. he might try and make amends, but you know he doesn’t even care for you, deep down –– he is trying for your sake, perhaps, but not because he nourishes an affection for you, and that stings. if it has to be like this, you want at least to let him know how irresponsible actions are not easily forgiven. a broken heart for another seems fair trade to you, and you no longer care for entertaining an endless discussion, as long as you’re on the winning side.

          𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒  ╱  view here.

          𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆  ╱  no one loves me  &  neither do i, them crooked vultures  +  motion sickness, phoebe bridgers  +  eyes, nose, lips, tablo.

          𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒  ╱  unanswered phone calls ; ghosting ; writing letters just to burn them. cold war  &  avoidance. knowing that you want what you can not have. marble statues ; an empty bed ; freezing fingers  &  no one to hold your hand. emptiness ; the feeling of being unworthy ; lighting a match once the power goes out  &  sitting alone at your couch, daydreaming. bittersweet intimacy. the fact that someone you now hate knows way too much about you. not letting go. 

          𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒  ╱  ❝  he fatally wounded me; that is, he gave me the wound that only love could repair .  ❞

[epouvantes]

❛ willa fitzgerald, cis woman, she/her ❜ was that charlie brodeur? the twenty-six year old nurse has been in town since birth. the human has a reputation for being kindhearted & quick-tempered. you know they’re around when you get flashes of ( messy buns, deep breaths, cracked iphone screen & fairy lights strung all over ). rumor has it, they have no affiliations. { samu, est, 25, she/they }

( OOC: TW: ANXIETY MENTION AT THE END OF THIS PARAGRAPH. hi! i’m samu, i’m 25 and i use she/they pronouns! i’m so so so so so excited for this rp and for you all to meet my babies!!!!! i wanted to make this lil ooc section just to let y’all know that i’ll be posting longer and more detailed intro-like posts for my charas eventually, but i wanted to be able to give lil summaries and connection ideas before then so!!!!! there it is!!!!! thank u sm for reading!!!!! also if i ever message you to plot, which i’d like to do with everyone if my social anxiety allows it, pls don’t feel obligated to plot with me at all!!!!! i love connecting with other writers and stuff but i’ll completely understand if you’re not up to plot with me and my charas <33 ) ← this is the same ooc paragraph in all of my first three intros, so pls feel free to skip it! <3

brief introduction.

charlie’s mother was born and then spent all her life in ottawa, ontario, until she got pregant with charlie (original name is charlotte but charlie legally changed it as soon as she legally could after turning eighteen). isabelle, charlie’s mother, had a double citizenship (canada/usa) thanks to her mother (who she had a very complicated relationship with) being american, so when she basically ran away from home (although not really because she was twenty years old at the time), the move to the states was somewhat easy (or well, as easy as it could be).

charlie and her mother are very close!! kind of similar-ish to lorelai and rory in gilmore girls when it comes to closeness, except that they’re more like... soft, i guess? very intelligent and curious like the gilmore girls, sure, but not necessarily as quick-witted, humorous and energetic. well, isabelle sort of is a bit more so than charlie, but yes! basically, charlie and her mom are super close!

charlie’s mom (isabelle) made herself quite the stable home in blackthorne, and it’s been a home to her and charlie ever since they arrived (whilst charlie was still a fetus, of course)! nowadays, the two of them don’t live together anymore, but they see a lot of each other and get along rlly rlly well! i don’t want to set isabelle’s job in stone since i’ll probably make a wanted connection for her, but i’m picturing her doing something either really artsy or people-focused! or even both?

charlie has known she wanted to be a nurse since the age of thirteen. back in her pre-teens, isabelle and charlie’s elderly neighbour, mrs. cunningham, got quite sick and though charlie obvi didn’t do physical tasks to help out, just holding mrs. cunningham’s hands and being there for her felt right. charlie has always felt best when she's helping or caring for others, and that doesn’t seem close to change any time soon!

she was honestly a bit difficult to get along with when she was younger? bc as kind as she tended to be, she got angry VERY easily, especially when it came to other kids being careless and not paying attention to others. like, since childhood, there’s nothing that frustrates charlie more than people not taking others into consideration. also, um... when she gets mad, she gets MAD. she’s a fire sign (zodiac wise) and it really, REALLY shows lmao!!!!! she also tends to be quite dramatic and theatrical when it comes to her anger so idfjlkdjlkfdj it can lowkey be entertaining for those not involved in whatever is going on!

rn she’s living in a two bedroom apartment with two roommates! i picture charlie sharing a bedroom with one of her roommate (and can they PLEASE have bunk beds iM begging sjdljfdljfdlkfdj), and for the other roommate to have their own bedroom! i feel like both bedrooms would be REALLY small, but that actually all the other rooms would be quite roomy? and that it’d be a super well lit apartment? and like definitely not high class or anything, but DEFINITELY homey!

can be a bit reckless when it comes to her own safety, especially if others are in danger (she does have a bit of a hero complex), which is DEF not ideal right now lmao dflkjdlkfjlkdfj

loves partying btw!!!! she works rlly rlly hard as a nurse and is generally quite chill outside of work, but she feels the need to let loose, like really loose at least once every two weeks or more!

connection ideas.

CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND: along with her mother, this is the person charlie trusts and cherishes the most. and also lbr she can be a TINY bit more of herself with her best friend than with her mother, bc no matter how much she loves her mother, she’s still her mother. and this best friend would actually probably get along with isabelle really well too! i didn’t necessarily picture charlie’s best friends as one of her roommates, but if you’d like to go for that too, i definitely wouldn’t be opposed! ( 00 / 01 )

ROOMMATES: as described a lil bit above, charlie shares a two-bedroom apartment with two other roommates! the rooms are all pretty spacey, except for the bedrooms which are on the small size! still, charlie shares one of the bedrooms with one of her roommates (probably with bunk beds!!!!!! the adult-y kind?? where the bottom bunk is like a bit bigger??), and the other roommate has a room of their own!! the apartment is also really well-lit, with a lot of well-placed window, and though it’s definitely not luxurious, it 100% has a very homey feel to it! ( 00 / 02 )

COLLEAGUE(S): people who charlie works with! other nurses would definitely be interesting because they can unwind together and understand each other in a way that other people can’t? ooooh, although there could also maybe be a “rival” nurse to charlie for whatever reason we can work out together (bc charlie is caring af so maybe if your character is more ambitious and has a different way of dealing with patients - which is probably just as good as charlie’s but only different - so maybe they clash about that?) but also!!!!!! dOCTORS PLEASE!!!!!! knowing some people in health services, the way doctors act with nurses can vary quite intensely (from what i know which ofc is only a small sample tho so!!), but like....... mayhaps a doctor who really respects nurses and understands how they can have a unique point of view when it comes to what’s happening to the patients, and who tries to work with the nurses as a team!! therefore a doctor who charlie probably really admires and appreciates!!!! on the other hand, though...... a doctor who seems to think they’re above nurses (whether they really are or not is up to you, but it could be the impression that charlie is getting!) like maybe a doctor who doesn’t take kindly to being questioned, especially not by people who aren’t doctors and like...... lmao charlie doesn’t care!!!! she’ll question you!!!! (also lowkey..... this is FAR from necessary but i just stumbled upon a list of enemies to lovers novels and this seems like such a cliché plot but slfkjlxjfkljdf i wouldn’t be opposed to that if it works out with the chemistry and all of that? i’m not into planning long term romantic plots bc i feel like it hinders things and what not, but! it can be a possibility if you’d like that, maybe?) ( 00 / ?? )

EX-FIANCÉ(E): charlie’s high school sweetheart!! they started dating when charlie was fifteen (and your chara was in the same year as charlie but ig depending on the time of year they might have been the same age or a few months older or younger sflkdfjlkjfd), and they got engaged when they were twenty-one years old! charlie’s mother actually didn’t really approve of the union, even though she loved your chara, as she thought they were too young, but back then, charlie didn’t care about what others said about she and your chara’s relationship! they were actually engaged for two years before they both realized that they kept on pushing off the wedding. and it wasn’t just because they were scared; they just weren’t sure they actually wanted it anymore. then, they decided to take a “break”. that was around three years ago, and the two have barely talked to each other since, avoiding each other’s stares when they walk by each other on the street, something that happens much too often to their taste. they both still have their rings, but i feel like they’re probably just holding on to them out of nostalgia, because it seems quite clear that their relationship is over. problem is, they were close friends before they started dating, and they honestly miss each other’s friendship. also!! i don’t have a gender preference for your chara tbh!! at the age of nine, charlie loudly announced that she liked girls after climbing on the tallest tree in the park during a special school outing (to the park a block away from their school..... ok it wasn’t that special of an outing, but most of the school was still there in the park!) and at the age of fourteen she officially came out as bisexual! ( 00 / 01 )

EDIT: i wanna post this now so i won’t make a lil paragraph for it right now, but!!!! party friends is def an idea that would work very very well!

i can’t think of anything else right now, but i’m definitely open to many many more ideas! these were just the few things i could come up with right now!

[sapphires-and-gold-fics]

Fictober Day 13: “I never knew it could be this way.”

Fandom: Game of Thrones / ASOIAF / Jane Austen

Characters: Jaime Lannister / Brienne of Tarth, and a whole bunch of other characters that I have shoved into this Sense & Sensibility adaptation

Notes: Alright listen. This was just going to be a very short little passage from Sense & Sensibility adapted for ASOIAF/GOT characters and then it just got away from me. It ran. It fucking ran. So now it's the first five chapters of Sense & Sensibility adapted for Brienne & Jaime. I know what you're thinking - WTF? My answer to that is... IDK. I honestly thought I was going to be shoehorning Brienne into this thing and I have to say she's been much more cooperative than I ever imagined. A word of warning - I don't know that I will pick this up again at any point. I 'm not making any promises. I love S&S and I love GOT and I REALLY love the world that I've mashed them into but I don't know if it's sustainable. So... I guess please don't get too attached? But if you like it, let me know! I was gonna do something else for NaNoWriMo but if this is pleasant for people maybe I'll do this instead? Please please please comment whatever your feelings because that will help me know if this is something that other people will enjoy or if this is unique to me, and I should put it to bed. Thank you all for reading "Put Me Back Together" thus far. I hope to not go as crazy for the rest of the month.

Read on AO3

xxxxxxxxxxx

***

The Stark Family had long been settled in the North. Winterfell, their estate, was large. And for many generations they had lived respectably, earning the good opinion of their neighbors.

Mr. and Mrs. Ned Stark had no sons, only three daughters; one, product of his first marriage, who was of an age to be wed, and two others by his present lady. With luck, his daughters could beget sons during Ned’s life, and he might thereby amend the inheritance. In the meantime, the estate was entailed away to his cousin and best friend from childhood, Mr. Robert Baratheon who had improved on his already considerable wealth, in marriage. To him therefore the inheritance was not so really important as it was to Ned’s daughters.

Ned might reasonably hope to live many years and to save a considerable sum for his family should he pass before a male issue came. Regretfully, he passed within a year of inheriting Winterfell; and the sum of ten thousand dragons was all that remained for his family.

Robert was sent for as soon as Ned’s illness was known, and to him Ned recommended, with all the urgency which illness could command, the interest of Catelyn and the girls. Robert promised to do everything in his power to make them comfortable. Ned was made easy, and Robert had then time to consider how much precisely was in his power.

***

No sooner was Ned’s funeral over, than Robert’s wife Cersei, without sending any notice of her intention, arrived with her child and their servants. No one could dispute her right to come; but the indelicacy of her conduct, and her ability to act with so little attention to the comfort of other people made things highly unpleasing. So acutely did Catelyn feel this ungracious behaviour that she would have quit the house immediately, had not the entreaty of her husband’s eldest girl induced her first to reflect on the propriety of going.

Brienne, this eldest daughter, possessed a strength of understanding, and coolness of judgment (according to her father, she had inherited these characteristics from her late mother, who had died in childbirth); these qualified her, though only nineteen, to be Catelyn’s counsellor and to counteract that eagerness of mind which otherwise could lead to imprudence. She had an excellent heart and was affectionate of disposition, but she knew how to govern her feelings, however strong, as evidenced in her disciplined pursuits - riding, archery, even fencing. Her father had supported these in acknowledgement of her departed mother’s interests. Her strength of character and ability to control her emotions was a skill that her stepmother and sisters had resolved never to learn.

At sixteen, Sansa's abilities were, in some respects, equal to Brienne's. She was sensible and clever; but eager in everything. The resemblance between her and her mother was strikingly great. Brienne saw, with concern, that she and Catelyn encouraged each other now in the violence of their affliction. Brienne, too, was deeply afflicted; but still she could exert herself for propriety and could strive to rouse her stepmother to similar exertion, and encourage her to similar forbearance.

Arya, the youngest sister, was a good-humored, well-disposed girl; but as she had already imbibed a good deal of both Sansa’s romance and Brienne’s quiet guardedness, she was a bit wild and spent much time in trees.

***

Cersei Baratheon now installed herself mistress of Winterfell; and the Stark women were degraded to the condition of visitors. As such, however, they were treated by her with quiet civility. Robert had resolved to make a gift of three thousand dragons for the girls as the measure of support he had promised Ned. But Cersei did not at all approve. To take three thousand dragons from the fortune of their dear boy would be akin to impoverishing him. She begged him to think again on the subject. Why was he to ruin himself, and their poor little Joffrey, by giving away all his money to strangers?

“It strikes me that they can want no money at all,” said she, “for they will have ten thousand dragons divided amongst them. If they marry, they will be sure of doing well - Sansa shall, at least - and if they do not, they may all live very comfortably together on the interest of ten thousand dragons."

“I believe you are right, my love; whatever I may give them occasionally will be of far greater assistance. It will certainly be much the best way. A present of fifty dragons, now and then, will prevent their ever being distressed for money, and will, I think, be amply discharging my promise to Ned."

"To be sure it will. I am convinced within myself that Ned Stark had no idea of your giving them any money at all. Indeed, it would be very strange and unreasonable if he did. They will be much more able to give you something." In the end, Robert insisted that Catelyn and the girls stay on at Winterfell until they could find a suitable home; in doing so, he saw his promise as kept.

***

They remained at Winterfell several months. Catelyn was impatient to be gone, and untiring in her inquiries for a suitable home in the neighbourhood. But she could not find a situation that at once answered her notions of comfort and ease which also suited the budget as Brienne had laid out for them.

The contempt which she had early-on felt for Robert’s wife was very much increased by prolonged acquaintance with her character. Catelyn might have insisted on leaving sooner, Brienne’s prudence by damned, had not a particular circumstance arisen. That is, there was growing attachment between Brienne, and Cersei’s brother, a proud young man whose gentlemanly qualities were at first in question, though they improved upon acquaintance, who was introduced to their household soon after his sister's establishment at Winterfell, and who had since spent the majority of his time there; most of it was spent at Brienne’s side.

Some mothers might have encouraged the intimacy from motives of interest, for Mr. Lannister was the eldest son of a man who was very rich; and some might have repressed it from motives of prudence, for the whole of his fortune depended on the will of his father. But Catelyn was uninfluenced by either. She thought only of Brienne’s happiness. It was enough that he was honorable, that he had an affection for her stepdaughter, and that Brienne returned the partiality.

Mr. Jaime Lannister was not recommended to their good opinion by any particular graces of person or address. He was handsome to be sure, but his manners required intimacy to make them pleasing. He was proud, yet almost too shy to do himself justice; but when his natural shyness was overcome - most obviously when he was not in the company of his sister, but most pronounced when he was with Brienne - his behaviour gave every indication of an open, loyal heart. But he fitted neither by abilities nor disposition to answer the wishes of his father and sister, who longed to see him distinguished in the world. His father wished to interest him in political concerns. Cersei wished it likewise, though perhaps not so lofty as to take him away from her influence. But all of Jaime’s wishes centered in more earthly things. He spoke of farming as oft as he spoke of military pursuits. He preferred riding a horse to driving a barouche, and it had nothing to do with the knowledge of how fine a figure he cut whilst riding.

Jaime had been staying several weeks in the house before he engaged much of Catelyn’s attention; she saw only that he was tall and quiet in the presence of others. He did not disturb the wretchedness of her mind. She was first called to observe and approve him farther quite by accident when the sharp strange sound of steel clashing in the garden caught her ear. When she made her way thence, she was surprised - not to see Brienne clad in breeches, or even to see her sparring with Cersei’s brother, but by Brienne’s smile - a sight she’d not seen in many moons.

***

Catelyn now took pains to get acquainted with him. She speedily comprehended all his merits as well as his faults, but the persuasion of his regard for Brienne perhaps assisted in disregarding the latter; she felt assured of his worth: and even his reserve, which went against all her established ideas of what a young man's mien should be, was no longer uninteresting when she knew his heart to be warm toward her girl. She considered their attachment as certain, and looked forward to their marriage as rapidly approaching.

"In a few months, my dear Sansa." said she, "Brienne will, in all probability be settled for life. We shall miss her; but she will be happy."

"Perhaps," said Sansa, "I may consider it with some surprise. Mr. Lannister is very handsome and amiable, but yet there is something wanting. He would rather speak of horses and swordplay than anything approaching artistry. Though he admires Brienne's drawings very much, he admires as a lover, not as a connoisseur. To satisfy me, those characters must be united. Oh! mama, how spiritless was Mr. Lannister's manner in reading to us last night! I felt for my sister most severely. Brienne has not my feelings, and therefore she may overlook it, and be happy with him. But it would have broken my heart, had I loved him, to hear him read with so little sensibility.”

"Remember, my love, that you are not seventeen. It is yet too early in life to despair of such a happiness."

***

"What a pity it is, Brienne," said Sansa that evening, "that Mr. Lannister should have no taste for reading."

"No taste for reading!" replied Brienne, "He read himself the other night. It is true, he prefers other activities, and he is not a great reader - he confided in me that it… challenges him at times. But he has an innate simplicity of taste, which helps direct him. I hope, Sansa, you do not judge him for this. Indeed, I think you cannot now I’ve explained it. Promise me that you will be civil with him.”

Sansa hardly knew what to say. At length she replied: "Do not be offended, Brienne, if my praise of him is not in everything equal to your sense of his merits. I promise I have the highest opinion in the world of his honor.”

"Of his honor, no one can, I think, be in doubt,” Brienne said quickly, “He and I have been at times thrown a good deal together. I have heard his opinions and, upon the whole, I find him well-informed, his imagination lively, his observation just.” She took Sansa’s hands in hers. “You will agree that, at first sight, my own address is certainly not striking, and my person can hardly be called handsome, yet he has had occasion to call the expression of my eyes... uncommonly good.”

“Uncommonly good? Tell me he used those words again, and I shall indeed change my mind about my civility toward him.”

“No, indeed. He called them… he said they were astonishing… in their similarity to a flower - I’ve mislaid the name. But certainly that meets your demands? He has his pride, Sansa, but the general sweetness of his countenance is easily perceived.”

"When you tell me to love him as a brother, I shall indeed think him sweet, Brienne.”

Brienne started at this declaration. "I do not attempt to deny," said she, "that I think very highly of him—that I greatly esteem, that I like him."

"Esteem him! Like him! Cold-hearted Brienne! Oh! worse than cold-hearted! Ashamed of being otherwise. Use those words again, and I will leave the room this moment."

“Be assured that I meant no offence to your sensibilities by speaking so quietly of my own feelings. In truth, I never knew it could be this way. Believe my feelings to be stronger than I have declared. But farther than this you must not believe. In my heart I feel scarcely any doubt of his preference. But there are other points to be considered besides his inclination. He is far from being independent. His sister and father wish a great deal for him, and I am very much mistaken if Mr. Lannister is not himself aware that there would be many difficulties in his way, if he were to wish to marry a woman who had neither a great fortune nor a high rank, and not even agreeable looks."

Sansa was astonished to find how much the imagination of her mother and herself had outstripped the truth."And you really are not engaged to him!" said she. "Yet it certainly soon will happen. You are so alike, Brienne. You have the same affinity for activity and thought. Trust his feelings as you trust your own. The only thing I am glad for, in your not being promised to him yet, is that I will have greater opportunity to know him and be assured of your future felicity.”

Brienne could not consider her partiality for Jaime in so prosperous a state as Sansa and Catelyn had believed it. There was, at times, a want of spirits about him which, if it did not denote indifference, spoke of something almost as unpromising - some hesitation or doubt. She knew that his father neither opened his home to Jaime at present, nor gave him any assurance that he might form one for himself, without strictly attending to his wishes. With such a knowledge as this, it was impossible for Brienne to feel easy on the subject. The longer they were together the more doubtful seemed the nature of his regard; and sometimes, for a few painful minutes, she believed it to be no more than friendship. But then he would seemingly stumble across her in the library or in the gardens and in the next moment they’d be suiting up to spar. She flattered herself to judge that it was only when he was with her that he seemed truly at ease, and happy. His regard at those times seemed limitless.

***

But, whatever might really be its limits, it was enough, when perceived by his sister, to make her uneasy, and to increase her incivility. She took the first opportunity of confronting Catelyn Stark on the occasion, talking to her so expressively of her brother's great expectations, of Tywin Lannister's resolution that all his children should marry well, and of the danger attending any young woman who attempted to draw her brother in; Catelyn could neither pretend to be unconscious, nor endeavor to be calm. She gave Cersei an answer which marked her contempt, and then instantly left the room, resolving that, whatever might be the inconvenience or expense of so sudden a removal, her Brienne should not be exposed another week to such insinuations.

In this state of her spirits, a letter was delivered to her from the post, which contained a proposal particularly well-timed. It was the offer of a small house, on very easy terms, belonging to a cousin of hers, a gentleman of consequence and property in the Riverlands. The whole of his letter was written in so friendly a style as could not fail of giving pleasure to his cousin; more especially at a moment when she was suffering under the cold and unfeeling behaviour of those she currently depended upon.

She needed no time for deliberation or inquiry. Her resolution was formed as she read. The situation of Riverrun Park, in a county so far distant from the North as the Riverlands, which, but a few hours before, would have been a sufficient objection to outweigh every possible advantage belonging to the place, was now its first recommendation. She instantly wrote Edmure Tully her acknowledgment of his kindness, and her acceptance of his proposal; and then hastened to show both letters to her daughters, that she might be secure of their approbation before her answer was sent.

Brienne had always thought it would be more prudent for them to settle at some distance from Winterfell. On that head, therefore, it was not for her to oppose her stepmother's intention of removing into the Riverlands. The house as described by Mr. Tully, was on so simple a scale, and the rent so uncommonly moderate, as to leave her no right of objection on either point; and, therefore, though it was not a plan which brought her any joy in her current state of uncertainty, she made no attempt to dissuade Catelyn from sending a letter of acquiescence.

***

No sooner was the letter dispatched, than Catelyn indulged herself in the pleasure of announcing to the Baratheons that she should inconvenience them for not much longer. Cersei said nothing; but her husband civilly hoped that she would not be settled far from Winterfell. She had great satisfaction in replying that she was going into the Riverlands.

Jaime turned hastily towards her, his voice full of surprise and concern, and repeated, "The Riverlands! Are you, indeed, going there? So far from hence! And to what part of it?" She explained the situation, describing Riverrun Park and its position along the Green Fork. She watched Jaime absorb the information and then turn his eyes to Brienne.

Catelyn concluded with a very kind invitation to Robert and Cersei to visit her. To Jaime she gave one with greater affection. To separate Jaime and Brienne was as far from being her object as ever; and she wished to show Cersei how totally she disregarded her disapprobation of the match.

***

The furniture was all sent ahead. It chiefly consisted of household linen, plate and china, with a handsome pianoforte of Sansa's. Cersei saw the packages depart with a sigh: she could not help feeling that as Catelyn’s income would be so trifling in comparison with their own, she should have any handsome article of furniture. Their man and one of two maids were sent off immediately into the Riverlands, to prepare the house for their mistress's arrival.

Catelyn took the house for a twelvemonth. No difficulty arose on either side in the agreement; and she waited only for the disposal of her effects at Winterfell before she set off for the south; and this, as she was exceedingly rapid in the performance of everything that interested her, was soon done, though she dawdled for two days longer than necessary in order to give Jaime and Brienne more time together.

They spent the majority of their afternoons walking the fields just beyond the garden away, by design, from Cersei’s prying. Brienne would have been contented with the library and gardens and their usual routine, but Jaime had insisted. There were still moments where he was all too quiet and Brienne was certain that he was preparing to clear the air with the secrets he was harboring, and make more firm his lack of regard for her. But in the next, he would be pressing her hand or smiling at her in that way he had only done before with foil flashing.

***

In a very few weeks from the day which brought Edmure Tully’s first letter to Winterfell, everything was so far settled in their future abode as to enable Catelyn and the girls to begin their journey.

Many were the tears shed by them in their last adieus to a place so much beloved. "Dear, dear Winterfell!" said Sansa, as she wandered alone before the house, on the last evening of their being there; "when shall I cease to regret you!—And who will remain to enjoy you?"

That same eve, Brienne went to the stables to visit to her favorite mare, which Catelyn had sold to Robert when keeping her proved unnecessary and unsustainable for their new life. Brienne was brushing her when the door opened and Jaime appeared out of the darkness, his hair bright, catching the light of her lantern. His look was solemn, and Brienne wondered if the hour of his confession had finally come. But he smiled and pulled a small book from behind his back and offered it to her.

She took it and studied the lettering on the spine, fingering the worn edges of the indigo cover in surprise. “This was my mother’s.”

“So you told me.”

She smiled, “You remembered.” He nodded sheepishly. “My father kept it in his study in the home I grew up in. When we moved here, he added it to the library thinking it would be kept in the family.” Jaime stepped forward and laid a hand on hers comfortingly, warm, “He used to read to me from it - stories of princesses and merfolk and knights… all of them with happy endings.” She stayed the tears forming in her eyes, and firmed her resolve. She slipped the book back into his hand. “Take it. Take it back. I wouldn’t want to lose track of it between now and morning. It belongs to your sister now.”

“Brienne…” he took her other hand and secured it around the book so that all four of their hands clasped it together. “It’s yours. It will always be yours. She won’t miss it. And even if she did, I would own it, for I was the one who took it. You’re leaving enough behind. I don’t wish for you to part with something so dear.” His hands were warm on hers and of them was trembling though she couldn’t tell if it were Jaime or herself or both. She nodded and he let go, his fingers whispering against the backs of her hands. “May I walk you back to the house?”

Brienne looked from him back to the mare whom she had abandoned on Jaime’s arrival. “I haven’t finished my goodbyes.” Jaime looked somewhat sad but he nodded understanding, and turned to go. “Jaime - “ he stopped and turned back to her, something shining in his eyes“ - we did not gather as usual after supper tonight.” She held out the book, “Will you read to me?” He grinned, a shadow of his usual smile, and took it. Then he sat on the stool by the door and slowly read her a well-traversed tale of knights and dragons while she worked until the horse’s coat shone.

***

The next morning, Robert and Jaime saw the Stark women off. Cersei claimed a headache and stayed abed. Jaime handed each of the women into the hired carriage. He lifted Arya into it, setting the eight-year-old giggling; then Catelyn who kissed his cheek like an affectionate aunt; then Sansa who, grasped his shoulders dramatically and wished him well; and finally Brienne. He handed her into the carriage, and then she reached her arm out of the window so that he might shake it. Instead, while Robert engaged the others from the other side of the carriage, Jaime looked up at her sadly and pressed her hand harder than she expected, and brushed her knuckles with his lips. “Goodbye… Miss Stark.”

“Goodbye, Mr. Lannister.”

He silently mouthed “Jaime” and she nodded before her hand retreated back into the carriage. He set a smile on his face - the kind he maintained in mixed company - and joined Robert on the opposite side of the carriage, and from there the two waved them off as the Stark women drove away from Winterfell.

***

They would travel four days to reach Riverrun. On the third night they were stopped at an inn and Brienne was alone while her stepmother and sisters finished supper below. She drew the indigo book out of the reticule she kept on her person. The edges seemed more worn, more loved, than she remembered. She settled onto the bed to read one of her favorite passages when she noticed that something almost the color of the cover seemed to be tucked into the pages about a third of the way through the book.

She carefully parted the pages to that spot and there, carefully pressed, was a cluster of five-pointed blue blossoms with yellow starbursts at the center of each. They marked in the book her favorite tale - that of Ser Galladon of Morne. And the blossoms themselves were the exact shade of her eyes. She’d been avoiding the truth when she told Sansa that she couldn’t recall the name of the flower Jaime had compared them to - she hadn’t wanted to inspire her sister’s romantic notions. But presented with them now, and in the privacy of her solitude, she could not deny her own notions. For if he’d meant to express indifference, why send her away with the book? And why press forget-me-nots between the pages?

[starrystarrybabe]

Oh, How the Mighty Fall [In Love] CHAPTER EIGHT (Ben Hardy x OC)

Lily Anne Mercury is brought in to help with Bohemian Rhapsody at the request of her Uncle Bri and Uncle Rog, and along the way, she might meet someone to share her life with. The only problem with this is that while their friends and the world can see that they’re perfect for each other, they’re going to be fully blind to this for a while. 

CHAPTER ONE, CHAPTER TWO, CHAPTER THREE, CHAPTER FOUR, CHAPTER FIVE, CHAPTER SIX, CHAPTER SEVEN

DISCLAIMER: I’m fully aware that it would’ve been physically impossible for Jim and Freddie to have a child even with this method during the time they were alive, but the idea of Freddie as a dad and the idea of how his child would turn out to be was just too sweet for me to not write.

Hey, everyone! Apologies for the slightly altered formatting, the option for the lines isn’t currently available on tumblr and I am confused. If you could help me figure this out, I’d appreciate it. Thank you!

-- casey

TRIGGERS: explicit sexual content (18+ only please!)

~

FACECLAIMS:

Kelly Gale as Lily Anne Mercury

Sira P. Kante as Ezichi Adebayo

Erika Linder as Bronwyn Ryan-Hughes

Bree Kish as Madigan Ryan-Hughes

Sonakshi Sinha as Anusha Laghari

~

LILY’S DRESSES

~

Lily is howling in laughter as she watches comedienne Anusha Laghari’s comedy special on Netflix. It is filled with jokes about growing up Indian, dealing with white people, and being in the comic industry as a woman of color. She’s currently talking about how she’s being described as the “brown John Mulaney,” but nothing about that man is remotely like herself, as much as she likes John Mulaney.

“The man is from a bloody Catholic household and walks around like he’s taking up too much space. I don’t have anything in common with that. The only thing that’s similar about us is that we both get massive paychecks,” Anusha says, grinning as the audience cheers. “I’m alright with the success rate being similar, but I am my own person, and not any version of anyone else. It’s been a wonderful show here in Radio City, and thank you so much for coming out to see me! I love you all! Good night, New York!” Anusha blows kisses to the crowd before the screen fades away to the end credits.

Lily met Anusha when they were both very young, and the pair were in the same Indian dance class. Jer would drop her off, and the Indian mothers would look at her curiously, but not say anything.

Needless to say, the fact that she was only half Indian was very noticeable when Jim’s pale complexion and cable-knit sweaters clashed with the brown women and colorful saris he was surrounded by.

Lily had practically no friends in that class except for Anusha, who told off some mothers and walked over to Lily when she was crying. She was always there for Lily, even though her mother didn’t exactly approve of the life Lily lived. When she saw how dedicated Jim was to taking care of his daughter and helping her experience her culture, she gained respect for him and practically adopted Lily as her own daughter, bringing her along to family occasions and constantly allowing the girl to sleep over with Anusha, and vice versa. Jim would sit with Anusha’s family at recitals and smile as his little girl twirled around stage with her best friend.

Anusha was always funny. Comedy made sense for her. She struggled for years, moved to New York, booked strange hours and worked under sexist bosses to make her name in the industry. Now, she’s one of the biggest names in comedy. Lily couldn’t be prouder of her childhood bestie.

Lily calls her friend, catching her breath. Anusha picks up immediately.

“Hello, Lily!” she cheerily says. “How was the special?”

Lily wipes a tear from her eye. “Darling, you’re so talented. I’m so proud of you. Also, my stomach hurts from laughing so damn hard.”

Anusha lets out a laugh. “Thanks, Lily! You’re the best, mate. I’m so glad you like it.”

Lily sighs and pets Reykja, who jumps up onto the couch. “It was amazing, darling. I’m so proud to call you my friend, and I know that Jim is smiling at you as we speak.”

Anusha quiets, letting out a small sigh. “Lily… stop it, don’t make me cry. You know I loved Jim more than anything. He was the absolute best. I’m so proud to call you my friend. Your latest album is a hit, and you’ve got a gorgeous blonde man pining over you. Now, if I were you, I would have immediately dragged him to bed, but--”

“Can’t I be nice without you making things filthy?” Lily scoffs, shaking her head. “You don’t even like blondes.”

Anusha laughs. “You’re right. But I have an interest in one of your blonde boy’s friends.”

She raises a brow. “Gwil is taken and so is Rami.”

Anusha huffs. “I know, Lily! You think I didn’t do my research? I like Joe.” She takes a deep breath. “Joe seems really nice, and he’s very cute and talented. I looked online, and I didn’t see anything about him having a girlfriend.”

Lily smiles. “He’s single.”

Anusha lets out whoops and hollers of joy. “Yes! Could you get me his number? I really want to talk to him.”

“You’re in New York right now, aren’t you?”

“Yep! I’m coming back to London tomorrow,” Anusha says.

“He’s in New York as we speak. I can tell Joe to meet you somewhere tonight.”

Anusha nervously laughs. “Lily, babe… I’m in sweats and my hair is greasy enough to sustain a fire. I can’t meet anyone like this.”

Lily nods. “I get it. I’ll ask him if he’d be interested in meeting you, alright?”

Anusha sighs in relief. “That would be great. Love ya, Lily!”

Lily smiles. “Love you too, Nush.”

She hangs up and immediately calls Joe, who picks up after a few rings.

“Hi, Lily! I was just thinking about you!” He sounds kind of drunk. “Sebastian and I are out drinking and one of your songs came on and I screamed ‘That’s my friend!’’

Lily smiles and chuckles. “That’s very sweet of you, darling. I appreciate it.”

“I also told everyone how you and Ben are soulmates,” he continues, giggling.

She holds back anger and sighs heavily. “That’s great, Joe. The world already thought that. I can’t wait to see Ben’s reaction to the news. Can I ask you something quickly?”

Joe laughs. “Sure thing! What is it?”

“Do you know Anusha Laghari? She has a comedy special on Netflix,” Lily begins.

“Of course I know her! I love her stuff! She’s also super pretty,” Joe says happily.

Lily smiles. “She’s my best friend from Indian dance school, and she wants your number.”

Joe gasps, covering his mouth with his hand. “Me? And her? Lily, you’re joking.”

“I’m not. She told me herself,” Lily says, leaning back on her couch.

“She’s talented and funny and gorgeous and cool, and— and— I’m just a lanky white dude who met Jeff Goldblum once! Why me?”

Lily shrugs. “Because you’re funny and handsome and charismatic and sweet.”

Joe stutters. “Aw, Lily, I’m blushing. Really, she asked for my number?”

Lily nods. “Mhm.”

“Give it to her, and tell her that I’ll text her when I’m not drunk. Thank you so much, Lily!”

“Of course, Joe. Uber home and drink some water, love.”

“Sure thing. Bye, Lily!”

Joe hangs up and Lily texts Anusha Joe’s number, explaining that he’ll text her when he’s sober.

—-

The next morning, Ben looks in the mirror and tries to pep talk himself up, trying on his beanies to see which one works best with his navy blue adidas jacket and black-striped joggers.

“What’s better, Frankie? Yellow or red?” He turns to his pup, who opens one eye and sniffs in the direction of the yellow hat. “Thanks, girl. I’ve got to look good for our walk today. I’m going to ask Lily to go to the Oscars with me.”

Frankie yawns and stretches, standing up and walking to Ben’s feet. Ben leans down and puts the leash on her before checking that he has his phone, keys, and wallet. He puts on his sunglasses and they leave the apartment, walking over to his car.

They drive to Garden Lodge and Ben parks next to Lily’s G-Wagon. The gate is already open, since Ben and Lily do this joint dog walk five times a week and Ben arrives at the same time every time they do it.

“I think the garden is pruned well enough,” Ben comments, watching as Lily meticulously goes through a patch of yellow flowers looking for weeds.

Lily looks up at him and takes off her filthy gloves and large sun hat, shaking out her hair. “I saw some weeds earlier this morning, so I decided to do something about it.”

Ben smiles as Frankie licks Lily’s cheek, and Reykja runs out of the doggie door to meet her friend. Frankie barks happily and Rey yips in return, playing with the other pup.

Lily picks up the end of the leash attached to Rey’s harness, standing up and looking up at Ben.

“Ready to go?” He asks.

“Yep!” Lily responds, walking alongside Ben and locking the gates after they exit. As they walk out of the driveway, they see two teenagers pasting notes to Freddie on the wall.

They spend ten minutes with the excited teenagers who fawn over Frankie and Rey, explain how much they love Queen and Room 301, and get selfies with both of them.  After the kids leave, Lily smiles up at Ben.

“They were more interested in you than me, you know. BoRhap made a difference,” she says, smiling as they begin the walk to the park a half mile away.

Ben nods. “I know. But they’re getting into your music as well because of the movie, so it’s not just Queen that’s thriving.”

She nods. “I just hope the Academy acknowledges all of that. Rami deserves to win, and BoRhap deserves all the awards it’s up for.” She chuckles. “I have a feeling I might be a little biased though.”

Ben looks down and lets out a little laugh. “I don’t mind. Actually, on that note, I’d like to ask you something.”

Lily bites back a smile and looks up at Ben. Is he going to do what she thinks he’s going to do? “Of course! What is it?”

Ben takes a deep breath as the dogs sniff the base of a tree, and gathers all his courage. “Would you like to go as my plus one to the Oscars?”

Lily’s eyes light up and her smile brightens the gray London sky. “I’d love that, Ben!”

Ben grins back at her, releases a breath he didn’t even know he was holding, and Frankie looks up at her dad, wagging her tail. “That’s great!”

Lily walks alongside Ben, and she laughs, shaking her head. “You looked nervous for a second, Ben.”

Ben feels a cold drip of sweat coming down his forehead and his face burns. “Huh? I’m not nervous. Why would I be nervous?”

Lily looks up at him and raises a brow. “I could’ve said no.”

Ben looks down, laughing nervously. “I mean, you could’ve, and gone with Joe again.”

She scoffs. “Even then I ended the night with you, Ben.”

Ben nods, smiling. “Yeah…”

She shrugs. “Besides, I practically set him up with my friend.”

Ben grins at her excitedly. “Seriously?”

She nods. “Mhm. You know the comedienne Anusha Laghari?”

Ben nods, grinning. “Of course! How do you know her?”

“She was my best friend as a child. We went to Indian dance school together as children.”

Ben nods, impressed. “Sometimes I forget that you know so many famous people.”

She grins. “Another one of my friends was Sean Ono Lennon. Yoko still sends me birthday gifts.”

Ben stops in his tracks. “You’ve met Yoko Ono.”

“Yes, I’ve been to her house for play dates with Sean. He helped me through the loss of my father.”

“Wait.” He waves his hands around in a confused gesture. “Does this mean that you met the other Beatles as well?”

She nods. “I know Paul and Ringo. I met George briefly when I was a baby but I don’t remember.”

Ben shakes his head as he continues walking. “That’s… how are you so nonchalant about that?”

She shrugs. “I was born into this life. It just sort of happened.”

Ben stutters for a minute before taking a deep breath. “Anyways, back to the topic at hand. Joe’s been single for a long time. What makes you think that Anusha can change that?”

Lily nods. “I have a good gut feeling about this, Ben. Also, she’s the one who asked for his number. He’s not chasing after someone who’s uninterested. She’s funny, he’s humble, and it wouldn’t be long distance since she lives in New York at the moment. That makes everything easier.”

Ben raises a brow. “Do you think it will last if it happens?”

She smiles and nods. “The last time I had a feeling this strong about anyone was when Zichi asked me about Gwil. Before then it was for Madi and Bron.”

Ben purses his lips. “You have a pretty good track record then. I trust your judgment. If Anusha is like she comes across in her special, her and Joe will be great together.”

She grins. “What you see is what you get with both of them. I have a good feeling about this.”

They walk along the track in the park in relative silence before Lily speaks up.

“You should wear a white suit jacket.”

Ben looks over at her and raises a brow. “All white?”

She shakes her head. “No. I think it should have a little bit of black, but that with nice dress pants and a pair of black Louboutins? Could be a major look.”

Ben nods, considering her suggestion. “What about sunglasses?”

She smiles, looking up at Ben. “That could be good.”

Ben takes mental notes of that before giving a suggestion of his own. “You should wear a red dress.”

She nods, pursing her lips. “Any particular style?”

He smiles and shrugs. “I think a princess gown would be fitting. After all, you’re the princess of Queen.”

She lets out a little laugh. “I guess I am. I’ll get it with a hoop skirt large enough to fit a person under.”

Ben raises a brow and looks away from her.

Anybody would be lucky to be under Lily Anne’s skirts. He just prays that one day, it could be him.

—-

Lily is corsetted tightly, and leans on the California King sized bed for support. “Fucking hell— holy shit! How much tighter can you go?” She asks the assistants helping her into her red ballgown.

It is heavy, large, has poofy sleeves, and her tits are barely contained by the layered fabric that dips low and squeezes her waist. The skirt looks like the curtain of an opera house, and the fabric is subtlety embroidered. She’s never worn something so grandiose before, but she has a feeling that tonight will be the night Ben admits his feelings to her, so she’s made every effort to look like a goddess.

Her heels are placed on her feet and her loose curls are adjusted before a heavy diamond choker and dangling diamond earrings are put on her. She looks in the mirror and catches her breath, her red lips turning up into a smile.

She’s never been this gorgeous before.

There’s a knock on the door, and she collects her clutch and does final checks on her outfit before opening the door and seeing Ben—

Her breath stops in her throat, because her man is looking so good tonight. That white suit with the black shoes and the perfectly tailored pants— she thinks she’s going to die.

He’s looking at her like she’s God, and in his eyes, she may as well be. Ben has never been struck speechless by how good someone looks before, but both of them are trying to form words as they look over each other.

“I— you— wow,” Ben gets out, shaking his head in awe. “You look amazing, Lily. Truly.”

She smiles and looks him over, adjusting his bow tie. “So do you. I was right to suggest the white tux jacket.” She smiles up at him. “You look stunning, Ben.”

Ben smiles and takes her hand as she exits the room and thanks her assistants. “We both look great. Now we just have to figure out how to transport me to the event so people witness how good I look.” She says, chuckling.

Ben nods, letting out a noise of thought. “You might need to stand.”

She sighs. “The things I do for fashion.”

—-

When they get to the red carpet, they are barraged by people asking if they’re a couple, and they brush off those questions, but a little part in each of them wonders how long it’s been since they could truthfully classify each other as mere friends.

This game they’re playing has to end. They need to admit to each other that they’re so much more than just friends to one another. The tension is thick, and the unspoken truth they both know has to come out of someone’s mouth.

When they leave the interviews and take photos together, Ben’s hand rests on the small of her back, and hers on his shoulder. Paparazzi are screaming about how good they look together, and they don’t respond. They already know that they’d be a gorgeous couple. If only one of them would make a move.

—-

“We’re not allowed in?” Lily Anne asks, raising a brow. “My uncles are performing and we were all a part of Bohemian Rhapsody.”

The guard shakes his head. “I’m sorry, ma’am. Your seats were taken by other people.”

Lily huffs, and looks back to see her friends nervously pacing, Anusha looking over to see what’s going on.

The rest of the night was going great, and she and Joe have hit it off wonderfully. Everything was wonderful until now.

Lily leans in, lowering her voice. “How much did they pay? I promise I can double it.”

The guard shifts uncomfortably and after a moment says, “One thousand for a whole row.”

She nods, and pulls out two thousand from her clutch. He takes it and nods, stuffing it in his vest pocket. “I’ll be right back, ma’am.”

Lily smiles and nods. “Good choice, darling. We’ll be waiting.” She walks back to her friends and smiles. “Give them a moment to kick the Kardashians out of our seats and we’ll be let inside.”

The whole group grins except for Ben. “How much money did you give him, Lily?”

Lily looks up at Ben. “That’s none of your business, Ben. It doesn’t matter, anyways. We’re in. That’s what counts.”

Ben shakes his head. “How much? I’ll give you the money, because it’s bollocks that you had to pay in the first place.”

Gwil and Joe nod, and Anusha speaks up. “Yeah. Tell us how much it was, and we’ll pay you back for it.”

Lily rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “No. It was pocket change for me, really.” Zichi gives her an impatient and accusatory glare. Lily crumbles under the pressure. “Fine.” She leans in. “Two thousand dollars.”

Joe chokes on his own spit, and Gwil curses in Welsh. Ben looks down at her and places a hand on her shoulder.

“Lily, you did all that for us to get in?” Ben asks.

She nods. “This movie has been one of the most important projects of our lives. It’s brought together you guys in a bond that’s truly unbreakable, my band, and my best friend from childhood. We’re a family, all of us. We deserve to be there when Rami and the movie win the awards it fucking deserves. I can earn back my money. It’s worth it for this.”

They are escorted inside, and sit down, Lily Anne apologizing for her skirt going onto Ben and Joe’s chairs. She stands back up as they sit down and then sits, her skirt covering both their laps. Ben laughs and she looks over at him, frowning.

“Why are you laughing?”

“It feels like I have a blanket on my legs. How thick is the fabric of this dress? How are you even walking around in this? Your legs must be damp.”

She scoffs. “Don’t be stupid, I have ventilation installed in this thing. I can’t have a swampy vagina by the end of the night.”

Joe covers his mouth as he laughs, and Ben snorts, grinning. Anusha is trying to contain herself and failing, and the whole row tries to quiet down as the lights dim. After they settle down, Ben lets out a chuckle and Lily elbows him. Joe snorts and Anusha shakes from containing herself. Then, the music starts.

Nobody is singing louder than them. Adam looks over and blows a kiss to Lily Anne, and she winks back at him, waving to Brian and Roger. The camera pans over to them as they shout along to We Will Rock You. It’s wonderful, and they could care less about what the other people in the audience think about them. This is their moment, and they will bask in it.

Things quiet down as the award show starts, and whenever BoRhap wins an award, they stand up and jump around, hugging one another and cheering loudly. They must be annoying the fuck out of literally everyone else in the audience.

Finally, Rami wins. Lily begins to cry, and Ben hugs her. She carefully angles herself so she doesn’t get any makeup on his pristine white blazer but still enjoys the tight embrace. When he gives his speech, she squeezes Ben’s hand, and he squeezes hers back just as tightly.

The ceremony flies by after that, and while their group mingles with other celebrities, Lily and Ben stick together and make their way into a quieter area of the auditorium.

“Four out of five isn’t bad,” he says, smiling. “I think Freddie would be proud.”

Lily laughs. “He’d be proud regardless of if BoRhap won all of the categories or none of them. You all worked so hard on this film, and it showed. He knows you tried your best, and it was done with love. It was worth the time it took to develop the project. Tonight is merely proof of that.”

Ben smiles at her. “I’ve never seen you so happy before, watching Rami win.”

She shrugs. “Rami deserved that. He became Freddie, and that takes a lot of talent and hard work to be someone that big. I’m so proud of all of you. You did a glorious job.” Lily takes a moment. It’s time to say it. “There’s only one thing that could make this night even better.”

Ben raises a brow and looks down at her. “What would that be? I’d be happy to provide it if I can.”

She purses her lips, taking a deep breath. “We’re close friends, you know that as much as I do.”

Ben’s heart skips a beat. “Of course I do. Casual friends don’t just go to the Oscars or walk their dogs together.”

Lily nods. “Casual friendship doesn’t usually involve quitting cigarettes together or buying out Indian restaurants either.” She looks up at Ben, who’s looking at her with a knowing look. “I think we both know that we’re not just close friends, either.”

Ben presses his lips together, and nods slowly. “I think we’ve known that for a while now.”

“I care more deeply for you than I have for anyone else in my life, and I felt that way almost immediately after meeting you. I knew those feelings were true after you threw away your pack of cigarettes and vowed to help me quit one of our worst habits.” Lily speaks slowly and clearly, and their gaze could not be separated by anything going on around them. “You didn’t kiss me at the Globes because you were afraid of mucking it all up and losing something so precious to you.” She places a manicured hand on his chest and feels his heart pounding. “You’re just as precious to me, Ben. You’re the only man I’m ever going to devote myself to for the rest of my days, and I know that.”

His hands shake as he places one on top of hers, and the other on her waist. He has no words, but none are needed.

“You’re mine, and I’m yours. We knew that a long time ago, but tonight, I’d like to get that confirmation. That would send me over the moon.”

Ben nods and pulls her tightly against him, and in the room full of people, kisses her passionately. It feels like winning that last Oscar to finally have her lips on his, and when she cups the back of his neck with one warm hand, he closes his eyes.

The only thing that matters right now is her. Everything else is drowned out by the sensation of an embrace months in the making.

When she pulls away from him, her eyes are sparkling, and he rests one hand on her cheek, stroking it gently. She leans into him and smiles, red lips quirked into a smile.

“I’ve been waiting to do that for so long…” he admits. “But as much as you deserve gentle loving, tonight I’d love nothing more than to be the man under your skirt.”

Lily smirks, grinning like a cat that got the cream. “I know. Why else do you think this gown is so bloody wide?”

They rush off to find a bathroom stall.

—-

“No luck?”

“I can’t fit in any of these stalls, Ben. The skirt is too wide,” Lily responds, pouting.

Ben sighs deeply and runs a hand through his hair. “Stand in front of a sink.”

Lily’s eyes go wide. “Benjamin Jones, are you serious? Anyone could walk in here and see us!”

Ben nods. “I don’t fucking care. Let them see.”

Lily sighs and looks up at Ben to see if he’s actually serious, and he nods to a sink. She releases a resigned breath and does as she’s told.

Ben promptly ducks under her skirts and taps her thighs, and she spreads her legs to give him room. She’s wearing black mesh panties, and he can see that she’s freshly waxed, with only a tiny bit of pubic hair.

“Oh… you planned for this, didn’t you?” Ben says with a grin.

Lily huffs, her face burning under her foundation. “Well… yes, of course I did! But I didn’t plan for it to happen this publically!”

Ben chuckles and shakes his head, gently kissing her thigh and causing her leg to shake. “Don’t worry, darling. This won’t take long. You’re already soaking wet, and I know what I’m doing.” He kisses further up her thigh, one hand holding her leg firmly in place. “Just relax and let me take care of you.”

She lets a moan and squeezes her eyes shut, gripping the counter. After five minues of Ben’s tongue doing magical things to her clit, he tugs the thin panties aside and strokes her folds with one finger. His hot breath and amazing tongue and finger combined with the tight grip on her thigh-- she knows she’s close.

Just as she’s about to come, Lucy walks in the bathroom, and she clenches up, all chance of orgasm gone. Ben has frozen up too, so Lily is just standing there with his tongue on her clit and his finger inside of her while their best friend has no clue.

“Hi, Lily!” Lucy says, waving to her friend before frowning at her flushed face. “Is everything alright? You’re so red!”

‘I have our mutual friend’s mouth on my vagina. Everything is great.’

“Oh, it’s nothing! The dress is just heavy, that’s all,” Lily tells the blonde woman. “It’s not easy to walk around in.”

Technically that isn’t a lie. The dress is heavy, and she has had to have assistance to walk around at the event.

Lucy nods. “That makes sense. The dress is magnificent, but highly impractical.”

Lily laughs. “Isn’t that true of most fashion, darling?”

Lucy nods. “It is.” She takes a moment and sighs, smiling. “Tonight has been wonderful. I’m sure Freddie is happy.”

Does it feel wrong to think about one’s father while there’s a mouth on your clit and a finger inside of you? Yes. It does.

“Freddie is probably ecstatic right now,” Lily says, grip tightening on the counter as Ben continues slowly.

Lucy laughs. “I’m glad. The boys are celebrating. By the way, where’s Ben?”

‘Under my dress. Pleasuring me with his tongue.’

“I don’t know. He was in the auditorium last I saw him, but—“ Ben hits her G-spot and she has to take a moment. “Ah. Just some period cramps. Sorry.”

Lucy looks over and pats her shaking hand.

“I’m sorry. I have some Advil back at the hotel if you’d like it,” she says.

“I’ll be fine, but thank you, lo—“ Lily kicks Ben when he hits a sensitive spot, and he pulls away, crawling out from under her dress in pain.

Lucy looks amused. “Do you want the Advil, Ben?”

Ben is all flushed and his hair is a mess. There’s red lipstick on his mouth and his pants have dust on the knees from where he was kneeling.

“That would be great, Lucy. Thanks.” He looks down, beet red.

Lily scratches the back of her neck, and Lucy smiles at the couple.

“It was about time you two figured it out. I’m glad you did!”

Lily and Ben mumble their thanks, and Lucy finishes washing up.

“Joe wants to pick up snacks at 7/11 with you, Ben. Lily, Anusha is waiting for you. Come out once you’re ready and we’ll be on our way,” Lucy says. “Congrats!” She calls out as she leaves the bathroom.

Lily helps Ben up and sorts him out, sighing.

“I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Ben smiles and kisses her forehead after she cleans up the lipstick. “It’s alright. That was fun.”

Lily smiles at his flushed appearance and kisses him, tasting herself on his lips.

When they leave the bathroom, Brian, having spotted them, gives Roger twenty pounds for losing their bet of whether Lily and Ben would confess to each other tonight.

—

“So we have Sun Chips, Doritos, tortilla chips, queso, and guac. Do we need anything else?” Joe asks, holding some of the items in his arms.

“I think that’s all,” Ben says, only really half engaged in the conversation. He’s still thinking about Lily.

“Is something wrong, Ben? You seem distracted,” Joe asks, frowning.

Ben lets out a little laugh and shakes his head. “No, not at all. I mean, I’m distracted, but it’s not for a bad reason.”

Joe nods, smiling. “I’m glad you and Lily figured it out, really. I’ve been waiting for that to happen for such a long time.”

“Thanks, mate. I appreciate it. How’s Anusha?” He asks, following Ben as they head up to the checkout.

Joe grins. “She’s amazing, Ben. She’s gorgeous, funny, and I’m not uncomfortable around her. We get along really well.”

After they check out, Ben walks back to the Uber with Joe and after they get in, he smiles at his friend. “Do you think you and her could date?”

Joe thinks for a moment before nodding. “I do. I really like her.”

Ben grins. “As long as I’m best man at the wedding, I’ll support you.”

Joe flushes and Ben laughs, and as they head back to the hotel, they bask in their happiness.

—-

“Then Lucy walks in—“

“He’s still under your dress?”

“Yes! So we’re talking and he hits a sensitive spot and I kick him, and he exits the skirt in pain,” Lily finishes, reapplying her mascara.

Anusha cracks up, clapping her hands. “Lily!”

“What?” She looks over at her friend, confused.

“I never took you to be an exhibitionist, but I guess life is full of surprises,” Anusha comments, grinning.

Lily rolls her eyes and shakes her head fondly, picking up her nude lipstick. “Shut up. How’s it going with Joe?”

Anusha grins, pausing her makeup routine. “He’s amazing, Lily. I couldn’t have imagined a better person to go to an awards show with.”

Lily raises a brow. “Do you want to date him?”

Anusha nods furiously. “I’m never letting him go, mate! He’s been perfect. Why would I give up that?”

Lily raises her hands in defense. “Alright! Ease up, Nush. I’m glad you like him. He’s a really nice guy, and you two will make a great couple.”

Anusha grins and adjusts her cocktail dress, looking over herself in the mirror. Lily looks over at her and nods in approval, liking the way the dress looks on her. Anusha lets out a satisfied hum and smiles before looking over at her friend’s dress and raising a brow.

“You’re certainly going for easy access tonight, aren’t you, Lily?”

She shrugs and looks in the mirror, turning in her metallic, low cut dress with lantern sleeves and a short skirt, the deep plunging fabric left leaves little to the imagination.

“I didn’t get to come in the bathroom. He has a job to finish,” Lily says, smiling. “After all, now there’s no use in playing coy after what happened earlier.”

Anusha smirks and pats her friend on the back with a knowing grin. “If you can walk tomorrow, I’ll know he didn’t do his job well enough.”

Lily’s suite soon fills up with guests, and the alcohol begins flowing. The boys finally get back from their trip and the snacks quickly become the center of attention, and as Lily heads over to get some guacamole and chips, she feels someone put a hand on her shoulder and turns to see Sarina smiling at her. She hugs the woman and grins.

“How’d you enjoy the ceremony, Sarina?” Lily asks, looking up at the woman.

Sarina grins. “It was wonderful! I loved it. Roger and Brian are very pleased with how everything turned out.” Her grin becomes a smirk. “How did you enjoy the ceremony?”

Lily laughs. “It was great. The boys deserve this, as do Roger and Brian. But I know you’re not asking about that.”

Sarina shrugs. “It was bound to happen and we both know it. Roger had a bet with Brian about it, and he won. He’s ecstatic that you two got together before he’s on his death bed.”

She rolls her eyes. “He certainly has a flair for the dramatic, doesn’t he?”

Sarina lets out a small laugh. “That he does. I’ll leave you to find your man and I’ll go off to find mine. Have a fun time, Lily.”

She kisses her aunt’s cheek and continues walking, and feels a large, warm hand on her hip. She looks up at Ben and smiles, placing her hand on his chest.

He leans down and kisses her cheek. “You certainly chose an easier dress for me to take off of you, didn’t you?”

She smirks and kisses him gently. “I’m glad you like the view, darling. I figured after the hassle of the first dress you deserved something a little more easy access.”

Ben grins and kisses her back, tugging on her bottom lip as he pulls away. She looks up at him with dark eyes, and he raises a brow. “You want to go to your room now?”

Lily sighs, looking down. “We should be a little subtle. Let’s wait a little bit. Once people are drunker, we can slip away and nobody will notice.”

Ben nods, kissing her forehead. “Sure thing, Lil.” He leans in close to her ear and whispers, “I can’t wait to absolutely ruin you.”

Her knees go weak and she looks up at him with a smile. “Was that a threat or a promise?”

Ben smirks and pinches her ass. “It’s whatever you want it to be.”

She raises a brow and grins. “I’ll see you later in my bedroom, Benjamin.” She pulls him down and whispers in his ear. “If I’m able to walk tomorrow, I’ll be upset with you.”

She walks off, hips swaying. Ben’s eyes follow her body, and she grins, feeling him follow her.

Joe is already very drunk, and so is Anusha. They sit together on the couch, leaning against one another.

“We should do karaoke!” Joe exclaims. “Can we get a karaoke machine?”

Anusha gasps and puts a hand on his chest. “We should totally get a karaoke machine. You’re a genius, Joey.”

Joe blushes and grins at her, holding her hand. “Will you sing with me?”

Anusha nods, smiling. “It would be my honor.”

Lily looks over at Ben with a knowing look, and he nods, impressed.

Joe points at Lily. “Call the front desk. We need a karaoke machine, stat.”

Gwil stands up from his place on the couch. “I’ll get it. You stay sitting, Lily.”

Lily smiles at Gwil gratefully and leans back, Ben’s hand resting on her shoulder. She moves closer to him and smiles.

—-

Surprisingly enough, this hotel can provide karaoke machines. Joe hollers as the machine is set up by a level headed Ezichi.

Anusha looks over at Lily. “You should do it!”

Lily chuckles. “What song do you propose I perform?”

Joe grins as he looks at her. “Another One Bites the Dust.”

Anusha nods enthusiastically and she nods, smiling. “I’ll appease you drunken idiots.”

“I’m not an idiot!” Anusha insists.

“I’m not drunk!” Joe adds, pouting.

Ben snorts in laughter and Lily shakes her head fondly before standing up when Gwil cues up the song and hands her the microphone.

Her performance is captivating. The dress combined with her moves, and the eye contact she makes with the rest of the group as it continues is amazing. She ends up on Ben’s lap, with her hands resting behind his neck and his own on her waist. She feels his trousers getting tighter in the crotch and smiles at the good work she’s done. The crowd cheers her on and she stands to bow, and walks off to the kitchen. She’s intercepted by Roger, Sarina, Brian, and Anita, and hugs her family.

“Turning in for the night?” She asks.

Brian smiles and ruffles her hair. “We’re too old to party like this. The rock and roll lifestyle isn’t meant for the elderly.”

She grins and kisses his cheek. “Well thanks for coming anyways. I appreciate it.”

Anita smiles and hugs her niece. “We wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

The couple leaves after saying goodnight, and after Sarina exits the room, Roger presses a small plastic square in her hand. She looks down at the condom and back at her uncle, pressing her lips together. Roger grins and ruffles her hair, kissing her forehead before leaving the room. She sticks the condom in the waistline of her dress and walks back to the kitchen, where she pours herself a glass of water.

She feels hands on her waist and breath on her neck and smiles, closing her eyes. “How’d you like my performance, Benny?”

Ben’s grip on her waist tightens. “I think everyone is drunk enough.”

She turns in his arms and presses her hips against his own, looking up at him demurely. “Promise to make me scream, Hardy?”

Ben leans down, eyes darkening. “That would be detrimental to your career if we make that a habit, y’know.”

She shrugs. “I know. I’m sure hickeys all over your neck and chest would be detrimental to yours as well. I suppose these can be our mutual indulgences.”

Ben smirks and rests on hand on her cheek, brushing back a curly strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m happy to oblige your desires, and wish for you to do as you please with me.”

Lily leans in, placing one hand on his chest. “What are we waiting for then? I have so many plans for you.”

The two of them walk into the bedroom and lock the door, and Lily pulls out the condom. Ben looks amused.

“Roger’s gift,” she explains, smiling as she throws the condom onto the nightstand.

Ben grins and pulls her close, kissing her and gripping her hips tightly in his big hands. She wraps her arms around the back of his neck and leans into him, jumping up to hitch her thighs around his waist. He supports her weight effortlessly, and his hands cradle her ass.

“I’ve been waiting so long for this to happen,” Lily says when they pull apart, catching their breath.

She gasps as Ben pushes her against the wall. “I’ve been attracted to you since the day I met you.” He begins sucking kisses down her neck. “When I saw you with Joe at the Golden Globes, I was so angry with myself.”

Lily moans and fists Ben’s hair. “Why were you mad? You’re the one who asked him to take me.”

Ben grinds into her and looks up at her, pushing her dress off her shoulders to reveal her chest. “Because you looked gorgeous, and you could’ve been my date. But I was an idiot who was too scared to ask you.” He kisses down her collarbones, leaving angry red marks all over. He relishes in her little sounds, and the cursing, and his name being said like a prayer. “I could’ve been doing this to you before the show if we had figured ourselves out sooner. You’d barely be able to walk on the red carpet, leaning on me for support. Everyone would know why you’d be unstable, since you don’t drink. The headlines would be proclaiming how filthy of a couple we are.”

Lily gasps as he nips her breast. “Do you always talk this much during foreplay, or am I just a lucky woman?”

He grins and looks up at her flushed face. “You like it?”

She nods, pupils dilated. “So much. Please don’t stop.”

He raises a brow. “Not even to finish eating you out?”

“...I can make an exception.”

He moves her to the bed and finishes what he started in the bathroom.

---

She spends five minutes composing herself before shakily sitting up in bed. Ben is taking off his white jacket, and she clears her throat, leaning against the pillows.

“Ben.”

He turns around to look at her and takes off his jacket. “Yes, love?”

“Let me,” she says, sitting on the edge of the bed.

He sits next to her on the bed and she straddles his lap, beginning to undo his bow tie. She can feel the bulge in his pants and smiles, tossing the tie aside and beginning to undo the buttons. “I’ve got you all worked up, haven’t I?”

He lets out a small laugh and squeezes her hips. “You’ve had me worked up since the day I met you.”

She smiles and finishes unbuttoning his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders. He takes off the shirt and she runs her hands over his chest slowly, eventually getting onto her knees and undoing his belt. “I’ve always thought you were very pretty, Ben.” She unzips and unbuttons his pants, and feels his thighs tense up.

“In college my friends and I would talk about our celebrity crushes, and, well…” He helps her take off his pants and slips off his shoes after she unties them. “You were always mine.”

She smiles as he leans down and kicks off his socks, and kisses him, chuckling. “We really have been into each other for the longest time.”

Ben’s breath catches in his throat as she kisses up his thighs, looking up at him. She puts one finger in the waistband of his briefs and looks up at him for permission. When he nods frantically, she pulls down his underwear and tosses it aside.

Ben isn’t the biggest she’s ever seen, but he’s proportional and thick, and she knows that he’ll feel good. She can’t wait to take him. She takes him in her hand and begins slowly pumping, and his muscles practically ripple with the release and uptake of tension in his body.

“Relax, love. I’ll take good care of you.” She presses a kiss to the head of his cock and he releases a sweet moan.

The sounds of drunken karaoke in the background are ignored, and Lily focuses on Ben’s noises as she takes him in her mouth.

---

The wet slapping sounds of skin on skin fill the room, and Lily moans out her lover’s name as he’s propped up above her, holding onto the headboard of the bed and her waist. He grunts into her neck, and she rakes her fingernails down his muscular back.

Sex has never felt this good. Sure, Frank made her orgasm, but he never made her feel quite like this. Ben sets a good pace and is incredibly attentive to her needs. She’s not afraid to voice what she wants him to do, but she’s more than happy to let him have his way with her.

She’s always enjoyed being submissive. Luckily for her, Ben enjoys being dominant.

“Lil… fuck, Lil. I can’t hold out much longer,” he groans, leaning into her neck.

Lily moans, her fingers tugging on his curls. “Me neither. Speed up-- oh! Yes! Like that!”

Ben moans as he comes, and Lily shouts out his name, orgasming at the exact same time as him.

She kisses him gently as he lays down partially on top of her, his head resting next to hers on the pillows.

“I love you,” he whispers. Her heart soars.

“I love you too, Ben.” She smiles and moves so he can dispose of the condom.

When he comes back, he brings her into his arms, and she entangles her legs with his, resting her head on his warm chest. She yawns, cuddling up to him. He closes his eyes and smiles, and they fall asleep in each others’ arms.

When they’re walking to the terminal, Lily tries to avoid Ben’s eyes, because she knows that he’s smirking. She is beyond sore, and it is painful to move after everything he did to her the night before.

They board the plane quickly and after Ben puts his and Lily’s carry on luggage in the overhead bins, he settles in his window seat. She sits next to him and immediately rests her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes and sighing.

“Did the Advil help?” He asks, kissing the top of her head.

“Not really,” she mumbles. “I can barely walk, you wanker.”

He laughs and places a hand on her thigh, smiling. “You’re welcome.”

She smiles slightly and when Gwil and Ezichi sit in the middle two seats next to them, Ezichi grins at the sight. Gwil holds her hand and smiles as well, because he’s never seen Ben this content before.

After the plane takes off, Lily readjusts herself and curls up against Ben, and he holds her, closing his eyes. The pair fall asleep entangled in each others’ embrace.

Gwil stands up and takes a picture of them, and once they land on the ground, he posts it on instagram with the caption “It took ten months. @joemazzello”

~

TAGLIST: @andtheytoldustotellyouhello @plethora-of-things @borhap-socials @everybodyplaythegame @i-the-fangirl @deakydeakydeaky @shisterfackisback @samanthadegaro @lv7867 @fatbottomedcurls @redspecialty @haisimsim @peterparkeroos @teenwolflover28 @ixchel-9275 @alessandra-elle @onexlittlespark @queenficarchive @leah-halliwell92 @rrrogah-tayluhh @maddistudiess @queen-fam @evrsncnewyork @reddiefreddieee @babebenhardy @toms-irish-girl @bensrhapsody @good-old-fashioned-rogerina

[ghouliexander]

HOLY SHIT IS THAT [ TYLER HOECHLIN ]?! Oh, wait it’s just [ ALEXANDER ‘XANDER’ GILBERT ]. Damn, [ HE ] looks good for [ 24 ], good thing that they’re [ BISEXUAL ], I might have a chance. I hear that they call them the [ REBEL HEART ] of the [ SOUTH SIDE ]. I guess that’s because they’re [ DETERMINED ] and [ HEADSTRONG ]. But I don’t think a lot of people know that they’re also [ STUBBORN ] and [ RUTHLESS ].

01.  BASICS

Full Name: Alexander James Gilbert

Nickname: Xander

Sex/Gender: Cis male

Birthday: August 11

Age: 24

Astrological Sign: Leo

Occupation: Drug dealer, street racer

Spoken Languages: English

Sexual Orientation: Bi with a preference for men

Birthplace: Riverdale

Relationship status: Single

02. PHYSICAL TRAITS

Hair Color/Style: Black, messy

Eye Color: Hazel

Face Claim: Tyler Hoechlin

Height: 6′0″

Weight: 160 lbs

Tattoos: Ghoulie tattoo on upper back, on the left sie

Piercings: None

Unique Attributes: Long scar on his left bicep from a switchblade

Defining Gestures/Movements: crossing his arms,  glaring

Posture: Confident, domineering

03. PERSONALITY TRAITS

Pet Peeves: slow drivers, loud chewers, people tapping things when they’re thinking

Hobbies/Interests: wood carving, boxing, plays the electric guitar

Special Skills/Abilities: has a degree in pharmaceuticals so he experiments with making new drugs a lot, is also an excellent driver and a nearly unstoppable fighter

Likes: whiskey, dogs, street racing

Dislikes: Serpents, cats, dolls

Insecurities: afraid of losing his family for good, not having control over his own life

Quirks/Eccentricities: can recite the entire periodic table on command, has an extremely high alcohol tolerance

Strengths: determined, headstrong, confident, ability to command respect

Weaknesses: closed off, lack of emotional vulnerability, ruthlessness, kind of an asshole

Speaking Style: measured, vaguely threatening

Temperament: scary calm

04. FAMILY & HOME

Immediate Family: Elliot Gilbert (brother), Clarissa Gilbert (mother, dancer at Afortunado)

How do they feel about their family? he cares about them, but he also doesn’t click with them, he feels like his mother is weak and that she could be so much more than a dancer at a club, and she doesn’t approve of his choice to be in a gang. He and Elliot have become distant but if his brother needed him, he’d help.

How does their family feel about them? They worry about him being in a gang, and are afraid of some of his harsher tendencies, they also wish he’d come back home instead of being out on his own.

Pets: A Rottweiler named Rex and a King Shepherd named Zeus, he loves both dearly and would kill anyone who hurt them

Where do they live? Southside of Riverdale, either in a trailer in Ghoulie territory or in the upper level of the House Of The Dead depending on the day

Description of their home: his trailer is neat, he doesn’t have a lot of homey possessions, just the bare essentials. the House Of The Dead is messy on the bottom, but his bedroom/workspace on the upper floor is pretty well organized

Description of their bedroom: both are clean, tidy, not super flashy, just with the bare essentials... the one at the House of the Dead also hosts some lab space and a safe where they stash drug money

05. THIS OR THAT

Introvert or Extrovert?

Optimist or Pessimist?

Leader or Follower?

Confident or Self-Conscious?

Cautious or Careless? Depends on the situation

Religious or Secular?

Passionate or Apathetic?

Book Smarts or Street Smarts? Both, leaning towards streets

Compliments or Insults?

Pajamas or Lingerie? Boxers

06. FAVORITES

Favorite Color: Red

Favorite Clothing Style/Outfit: Dark colours, leather jacket usually

Favorite Bands/Songs/Type of Music: rock, alternative

Favorite Movies: action, thrillers, horror

Favorite Books: Stephen King

Favorite Foods/Drinks: Chinese food, whiskey

Favorite Sports/Sports Teams: Patriots

Favorite Time of Day: Dusk

Favorite Weather/Season: Autumn

Favorite Animal: Dogs

07. MISCELLANEOUS

Fears/Superstitions: losing his family, letting down his walls, losing control of his destiny

Political Views: centre

Addictions: none

Best School Subject: Science

Worst School Subject: History

School Clubs/Sports: n/a

How does he get money? drug dealing, winning street races

How is he with technology? Pretty average

08. PAST & FUTURE

Fondest Memory: Winning his first street race when he was 15

Deepest, Darkest Secret: He tested out an experimental drug on one of the younger Ghoulies a few years ago and they died — he made it look like a suicide and no one’s asked any questions since

Dream Vacation: visiting South Africa

Best thing that has ever happened to this character: Getting his motorcycle

Worst thing that has ever happened to this character: Losing his first dog, Jasey

What do they want to be when they grow up? when he was a kid he wanted to be a firefighter but he doesn’t really have any plans right now that go far beyond the present

Perfect Date: It ends in sex

09. BIO

Alexander Gilbert joined the Ghoulies when he was 14 years old, sick of dealing with his mother’s constant degradation at the club where she danced and constantly clashing with his brother. Instead, he left home to find his own way, and joined the Ghoulies, where he felt wanted, valued and important. Along the way he picked up a lot of skills, and worked his way up until he was a trusted member of senior command. Still, he never liked the Snake Charmer or her daughter... what business did they have here? Only joining the Ghoulies when they were rejected from the Serpents? It rubbed him the wrong way. There were infinite Ghoulies more fit to lead them than that whore and her daughter.

But Xander remained quiet, the perfect gang member, the perfect soldier, and bided his time. Eventually someone would slip up, would crack, and he would seize the opportunity to take power and lead the Ghoulies to their rightful place in Riverdale, controlling the South Side as they should be and grinding the Serpents into the ground.

Wickedly smart, and full of potential if he actually bothered to put it into something legal, Xander went to college, studying long enough to get a pharmaceutical degree that he put into practice experimenting with new types of drugs to hook the denizens of Riverdale on to. He also street races like a pro, even if his bike is his preferred means of transportation. He knows a lot of what he does hurts other people, but why is that his problem? If people seek out drugs, that’s their problem, not his. He’s just filling a need. If he didn’t do it, someone else would.

Not one for feelings, getting him into your bed is easy, but getting him to let you into his heart is sure as hell a lot harder. Xander is cold, and calculating, and he’s happy to be that way. It’s what’s going to help him get the Ghoulies back on top and make sure no one fucks with them again.

[tpthvegebulevents]

MAYHEM 2018 - WEEK 1 - [ANON E] “CLANDESTINE DOWNFALL”

Title: Clandestine Downfall

Summary: Once upon a time in a far away land lived two young orphans, destined to meet in a musty barn by moonlight. Enter Bulma, a teenager looking after her 7 young siblings and childlike boyfriend Yamcha. In order to make a living she must dress as a man and work for a monarch she does not support. The monarch being young Prince Vegeta, a fiery and powerful man, who wants nothing more than to fulfill his late father's prophecy. And, deep in the shadows exists a mysterious regent. Until a time when Vegeta comes of age, the regent will hold the kingdom firmly in his grasp. What will become of these 3 seemingly unrelated people? Will romance bloom between the two teenagers? Or will their personalities violently clash?

This is Clandestine Downfall.

Genre: Cloak-and-dagger, dark fiction, AU, angst, fairy tale interpretation

Rated: T for violence and suggestive language. (eventually Rated M in later chapters)

TW: death and death threats, mild violence, cross-dressing

Chapter 1

(Chapters 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7)

10 years ago.

The king was ill. After a long reign succeeding his father, he was finally in death's throes. Many rejoiced, for the heir was not yet 8 years, and the selected Regent was highly favored among the people. The Regent, chosen by the king and his council, was a powerful warrior and diplomatic leader; who sat on the king's council for more than 20 years. It was unfortunate that King Vegeta had such dismal approval among the common folk, but the acts he committed to achieve that were necessary for the prosperity of the kingdom.

“Come, my son,” he beckoned to the young prince who looked upon his father stone faced. The boy had first watched his mother die after the birth of his brother only 3 years ago. Then, without its mother, the tiny infant also died. The castle had gone quiet that day and never fully returned to its once loud and bustling self again. He saw the same longing look in his father's eyes as he had seen in theirs. And he was furious. The prince was furious that his father was going to abandon him, to leave him without a person in this world to love him. And for that, he decided he would shed no tears, he would be stone cold to the man who would soon betray him.

But he answered the call and moved closer to the bedside.

“Out there lies our great kingdom. There is none more powerful than ours. With it you can conquer anything, and this is my legacy I leave for you alone my son.” The king stopped to regain his breath. His face was pale and spattered with purple blood vessels that had ruptured in his vain attempts to breathe. His eyes were gray and red, an image young Vegeta would not soon forget.

“You are the most powerful man in the world my son. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. I have earned that for you. Do not disappoint me by throwing that away.”

The prince could feel his throat swelling and his eyes stinging. He grabbed his red cloak and abruptly left the room so the king could not see his weakness.

And later that day, the king died.

Present Day.

Bulma fastened her light blue locks in a ribbon at the base of her head. The ribbon was a navy color to match her riding jacket. She tightened her corset just so, to conceal her bothersome chest. Once dressed she made her way to the palace stables where she earned wages to support her funny family.

Bulma had a bleeding heart for orphans as she herself was one. Her father had supported them until he had fallen ill, and when he passed 2 years ago, she was the eldest who took over that responsibility.  Her seven siblings were all under the age of 10, and none of which were related to her by blood. Her father adopted the newborn infant Goku nearly 10 years ago after having delivered him from a whore who died in childbirth. The courtesan had no family to speak of and wouldn't name a father. Dr. Briefs felt partially responsible, as he couldn't save her life. So he took the baby home where 7 year old Bulma and he raised it. Over the years, Dr. Briefs had become known as the caretaker of orphans. And his legacy didn't end when he died, Bulma adopted the most recent child a year ago, a 3 year old girl named Launch.

Yes, Bulma worked hard for this funny family of hers. She would do anything for them. Even impersonating a man just to make a respectable wage.

…

Bulma adored her job. Though it was difficult at times, she enjoyed the peace of it. She enjoyed the horses who didn't talk back to her, or pull her hair or annoy her in general. And as disgusting as it was, she loved the smell. The horses smelled strongly of manure and hay, a smell that pierced the nostrils and intoxicated the lungs. And at the end of a long day of shoveling manure and tending the animals, she smelled the same. It was enough to deter the little ones from smothering her until she could properly bathe. For that, she was thankful.

Sighing, she dusted the dirt from her trousers.

“Hey beautiful. How's about you let down your hair?” Yamcha’s voice pierced her eardrums and sent a shock down her spine. Without missing a beat she rose her powerful fist to his cheek and knocked him back.

“Yamcha how many times do I have to tell you not to sneak up on me like that!” her face reddened from the intensity of her shout. Shocked at the sudden noise a few horses whined and reared, but quickly settled down.

Yamcha lifted himself from the hay.

“Haha, I came to ask ya out on a date tonight Bulma!” the rascal grinned his signature grin.

“Yamcha please,” Bulma pleaded, “no one can know my identity here, unless you want to expose me and have me hung for cross dressing!”  the furious girl whispered.

“C'mon, Bulls. No one's around. Either way I'm sorry. Let's just get outta here!” he grabbed for her waist, but she pulled away.

Still slightly agitated, Bulma thought for a moment. Though her coworker and friend meant the world to her she just couldn't get as close to him as he was to her. Something about sharing his bed felt wrong, like she was romantically involved with her brother. Yes, Yamcha fundamentally felt like a brother to her. Just another orphan she’d adopted, but close to her age… and handsome. She'd never felt so conflicted about a person in her life.

“Yamcha, I…” she started. “The quartermaster ordered extra work tonight. The uh, stalls have been gathering cobwebs like crazy since spring started. Yes, and I've been tasked with cleaning them out tonight.” she lied, poorly. Yamcha caught her tone but didn't feel like another rejection.

“I'll feed the kids. Hurry home Bulma.” he said as the light in his grin faded.

The prince was sluggishly pulling his fencing trousers on when there was a knock at his chamber doors. It was General Nappa no doubt,  wondering what in the hells was taking so long. The prince sighed and rolled his eyes to the ceiling.

“Yes?” he called towards the door, annoyed.

“The General wishes to speak with you, my prince,” a mousey maiden called from the other side.

Vegeta scowled. He secured the last hook of his trousers and made his way to the door.  He swung the door open, with a sharp force.  The raven haired maid took one look at the prince's bare, scarred chest and reddened. Vegeta sent a corner eyed glare her way to let her know she was no longer welcome. With haste, she scurried away. The towering general stepped out of the hallway shadows towards the prince. The powerful man could nearly grab the tension from the air. The prince always had an attitude in the general's presence, though he tried vainly to get on his good side. He made an attempt to stifle a cough but he was unable.

“Your grace,” Nappa choked.

“Nappa,” the prince uttered disdainfully.

“Due to unforeseen events,” Nappa hacked out the mucus in the back of his throat. “I will be unable to train with you this evening.”

Without relaxing his scowl, Vegeta rejoiced internally. He wasn't feeling quite up to sparring with Nappa, and wanted to train alone instead.

“I suppose it can't be helped. You will lose a bit of your allowance as consequence,” the prince scolded.

The general nodded, and bowed before taking a hasty leave.

The prince inhaled the musty hallway air. For a split second he closed his eyes and imagined a brighter, cleaner castle, with noisy people and floral arrangements hung from every pillar. The memory was of the last time he was truly happy, when his mother ruled the kingdom. In the many years since those days, the castle had been rotting. No flowers adorned these halls, no singing voices echoing. Only dark, flickering candles, and cobwebs as decoration.

…

“Mirror mirror,” the rich and dark voice echoed.

The Regent ran his rough fingers along the smooth gold that encased the mirror. The mirror was a gift from the late king, who unfortunately put his trust in the rat of a man whom he'd chosen as Regent.

“M'lord,” the magic mirror answered.

“Who is the most powerful man of all?” the Regent asked, sure of the answer, but curious all the same.

For a moment, the mirror shown his dark reflection, but slowly faded to a new face. The new face was strong, determined, and ambitious. He had dark eyes and a shock of long black hair. It was none other than the Prince Vegeta.

“For now,” the mirror began, “you are the most powerful man alive. But soon, this boy will become a man. And when he has come of age he will take your throne. You must control him or kill him. Neither option will be easy.”

The Regent frowned upon the mirror, as it faded back to his own reflection. His own black look shocked himself, and he relaxed his face into a regal expression. Suddenly, he heard footsteps in the hall. He hastily covered the mirror with crimson drapes, and turned to greet the visitor.

…

Vegeta made his way toward the training arena. The sun had tucked itself into the mountains as dusk settled over the kingdom. Good, Vegeta thought, the few stable servants will be gone by now, and I can train in peace. He sent a quick glance into the amber hay covered barn, where all the horses were all safely locked in their stalls. The were no people to be seen, a relief for the lone prince. The training arena was conveniently connected to the stables, a large open area used for more than just training horses, but the prince as well.

Without hesitation the prince went to work on a sturdy training dummy. His sabre effortlessly pierced the dummy. It was no challenge to fight an unmoving target, but the prince sliced away nonetheless.

With Yamcha gone, Bulma decided to fulfill her lie. She decided to fully commit to her disheveled appearance, crouching hands and knees into the earth. Good thing I've got these gloves on. A pretty girl like me shouldn't lower herself to scraping cobwebs from horse stalls! She thought to herself. Just then a loud crash startled her. It sounded like someone was in the barn with her, and… metal clashing?! In her shock she knocked her head against the hitching post and cried out. “ow!”

Grasping at the new lump on her head, she looked up.

Towering over her, the dark figure stepped closer.

“What're you doing here, boy?” the prince wiped the sweat from his forehead, sweeping the sinful black bangs of his to the side. His grimace frightened Bulma, so she averted her gaze from his face to slightly lower.

“uh, um…” she stuttered, trying hard to maintain a deep and manly voice.

The moon was bright, its rays peeked through the almost closed windows. The thin slices of moonlight draped upon the prince's upper body like luminescent ribbons. Bulma gawked at his muscles, sinuous and bulging. Spattered on his dark skin were numerous white scars. In the moonlight they shimmered as pure white as snow. His smell, while strong, was not entirely unpleasant. A mixture of violets and perspiration overpowered the existing barn smell.

“Explain yourself, runt!” he growled and lifted his fist as a threat.

“I'm Bull, sir, I work here, I was just-"

“Sir?! How dare you speak to your prince like that! You will address me properly unless you want to die!” his powerful voice silenced the entire barn. Even the animals stood motionless in fear of such power.

Bulma’s brain took a second to comprehend the situation. The prince? She looked again at his face and instantly recognized him.

“My- Your grace,” she stumbled. The hand that grasped her head tightened to a fist as she bowed further to the ground in respect. His glare burned holes into her back.

Tch. The prince lifted his boot and stepped on Bulma’s head, forcing it into the earth, the hay, and the manure.

She died a thousand deaths while he pinned her there. I'm dead, I will die here. She lamented silently.

“I should have you killed,” Vegeta whispered menacingly. “you are to leave the palace grounds by dusk every day. If I ever catch you here, at this time again I will crush your skull with my own hands.”

He lifted his leg and swiftly kicked the stable boy in the side. Bulma yelped in agony as it knocked the wind from her lungs.

“Yes, my prince,” she wheezed, grabbing her side and stumbling to her feet. As she made her way out of the barn, tears streamed from her face. She grasped her sides tightly, and started the long trek home through the forest.

What an evil man…

To be continued...

Read Next

[quillovesdbz]

Week one submission for the @tpthvegebulmayhem

Clandestine Downfall

Chapters: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7

Summary: Once upon a time in a far away land lived two young orphans, destined to meet in a musty barn by moonlight. Enter Bulma, a teenager looking after her 7 young siblings and childlike boyfriend Yamcha. In order to make a living she must dress as a man and work for a monarch she does not support. The monarch being young Prince Vegeta, a fiery and powerful man, who wants nothing more than to fulfill his late father's prophecy. And, deep in the shadows exists a mysterious regent. Until a time when Vegeta comes of age, the regent will hold the kingdom firmly in his grasp. What will become of these 3 seemingly unrelated people? Will romance bloom between the two teenagers? Or will their personalities violently clash?

This is Clandestine Downfall.

Genre: Cloak-and-dagger, dark fiction, AU, angst, fairytale interpretation

Rated: T for violence and suggestive language.

TW: death and death threats, mild violence, cross-dressing

Prompts: Skin as white as snow, let down your hair

...

10 years ago.

The king was ill. After a long reign succeeding his father, he was finally in death's throes. Many rejoiced, for the heir was not yet 8 years, and the selected Regent was highly favored among the people. The Regent, chosen by the king and his council, was a powerful warrior and diplomatic leader; who sat on the king's council for more than 20 years. It was unfortunate that King Vegeta had such dismal approval among the common folk, but the acts he committed to achieve that were necessary for the prosperity of the kingdom.

“Come, my son,” he beckoned to the young prince who looked upon his father stone faced. The boy had first watched his mother die after the birth of his brother only 3 years ago. Then, without its mother, the tiny infant also died. The castle had gone quiet that day and never fully returned to its once loud and bustling self again. He saw the same longing look in his father's eyes as he had seen in theirs. And he was furious. The prince was furious that his father was going to abandon him, to leave him without a person in this world to love him. And for that, he decided he would shed no tears, he would be stone cold to the man who would soon betray him.

But he answered the call and moved closer to the bedside.

“Out there lies our great kingdom. There is none more powerful than ours. With it you can conquer anything, and this is my legacy I leave for you alone my son.” The king stopped to regain his breath. His face was pale and spattered with purple blood vessels that had ruptured in his vain attempts to breathe. His eyes were gray and red, an image young Vegeta would not soon forget.

“You are the most powerful man in the world my son. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. I have earned that for you. Do not disappoint me by throwing that away.”

The prince could feel his throat swelling and his eyes stinging. He grabbed his red cloak and abruptly left the room so the king could not see his weakness.

And later that day, the king died.

Present Day.

Bulma fastened her light blue locks in a ribbon at the base of her head. The ribbon was a navy color to match her riding jacket. She tightened her corset just so, to conceal her bothersome chest. Once dressed she made her way to the palace stables where she earned wages to support her funny family.

Bulma had a bleeding heart for orphans as she herself was one. Her father had supported them until he had fallen ill, and when he passed 2 years ago, she was the eldest who took over that responsibility.  Her seven siblings were all under the age of 10, and none of which were related to her by blood. Her father adopted the newborn infant Goku nearly 10 years ago after having delivered him from a whore who died in childbirth. The courtesan had no family to speak of and wouldn't name a father. Dr. Briefs felt partially responsible, as he couldn't save her life. So he took the baby home where 7 year old Bulma and he raised it. Over the years, Dr. Briefs had become known as the caretaker of orphans. And his legacy didn't end when he died, Bulma adopted the most recent child a year ago, a 3 year old girl named Launch.

Yes, Bulma worked hard for this funny family of hers. She would do anything for them. Even impersonating a man just to make a respectable wage.

…

Bulma adored her job. Though it was difficult at times, she enjoyed the peace of it. She enjoyed the horses who didn't talk back to her, or pull her hair or annoy her in general. And as disgusting as it was, she loved the smell. The horses smelled strongly of manure and hay, a smell that pierced the nostrils and intoxicated the lungs. And at the end of a long day of shoveling manure and tending the animals, she smelled the same. It was enough to deter the little ones from smothering her until she could properly bathe. For that, she was thankful.

Sighing, she dusted the dirt from her trousers.

“Hey beautiful. How's about you let down your hair?” Yamcha’s voice pierced her eardrums and sent a shock down her spine. Without missing a beat she rose her powerful fist to his cheek and knocked him back.

“Yamcha how many times do I have to tell you not to sneak up on me like that!” her face reddened from the intensity of her shout. Shocked at the sudden noise a few horses whined and reared, but quickly settled down.

Yamcha lifted himself from the hay.

“Haha, I came to ask ya out on a date tonight Bulma!” the rascal grinned his signature grin.

“Yamcha please,” Bulma pleaded, “no one can know my identity here, unless you want to expose me and have me hung for cross dressing!”  the furious girl whispered.

“C'mon, Bulls. No one's around. Either way I'm sorry. Let's just get outta here!” he grabbed for her waist, but she pulled away.

Still slightly agitated, Bulma thought for a moment. Though her coworker and friend meant the world to her she just couldn't get as close to him as he was to her. Something about sharing his bed felt wrong, like she was romantically involved with her brother. Yes, Yamcha fundamentally felt like a brother to her. Just another orphan she’d adopted, but close to her age… and handsome. She'd never felt so conflicted about a person in her life.

“Yamcha, I…” she started. “The quartermaster ordered extra work tonight. The uh, stalls have been gathering cobwebs like crazy since spring started. Yes, and I've been tasked with cleaning them out tonight.” she lied, poorly. Yamcha caught her tone but didn't feel like another rejection.

“I'll feed the kids. Hurry home Bulma.” he said as the light in his grin faded.

...

The prince was sluggishly pulling his fencing trousers on when there was a knock at his chamber doors. It was General Nappa no doubt,  wondering what in the hells was taking so long. The prince sighed and rolled his eyes to the ceiling.

“Yes?” he called towards the door, annoyed.

“The General wishes to speak with you, my prince,” a mousey maiden called from the other side.

Vegeta scowled. He secured the last hook of his trousers and made his way to the door.  He swung the door open, with a sharp force.  The raven haired maid took one look at the prince's bare, scarred chest and reddened. Vegeta sent a corner eyed glare her way to let her know she was no longer welcome. With haste, she scurried away. The towering general stepped out of the hallway shadows towards the prince. The powerful man could nearly grab the tension from the air. The prince always had an attitude in the general's presence, though he tried vainly to get on his good side. He made an attempt to stifle a cough but he was unable.

“Your grace,” Nappa choked.

“Nappa,” the prince uttered disdainfully.

“Due to unforeseen events,” Nappa hacked out the mucus in the back of his throat. “I will be unable to train with you this evening.”

Without relaxing his scowl, Vegeta rejoiced internally. He wasn't feeling quite up to sparring with Nappa, and wanted to train alone instead.

“I suppose it can't be helped. You will lose a bit of your allowance as consequence,” the prince scolded.

The general nodded, and bowed before taking a hasty leave.

The prince inhaled the musty hallway air. For a split second he closed his eyes and imagined a brighter, cleaner castle, with noisy people and floral arrangements hung from every pillar. The memory was of the last time he was truly happy, when his mother ruled the kingdom. In the many years since those days, the castle had been rotting. No flowers adorned these halls, no singing voices echoing. Only dark, flickering candles, and cobwebs as decoration.

…

“Mirror mirror,” the rich and dark voice echoed.

The Regent ran his rough fingers along the smooth gold that encased the mirror. The mirror was a gift from the late king, who unfortunately put his trust in the rat of a man whom he'd chosen as Regent.

“M'lord,” the magic mirror answered.

“Who is the most powerful man of all?” the Regent asked, sure of the answer, but curious all the same.

For a moment, the mirror shown his dark reflection, but slowly faded to a new face. The new face was strong, determined, and ambitious. He had dark eyes and a shock of long black hair. It was none other than the Prince Vegeta.

“For now,” the mirror began, “you are the most powerful man alive. But soon, this boy will become a man. And when he has come of age he will take your throne. You must control him or kill him. Neither option will be easy.”

The Regent frowned upon the mirror, as it faded back to his own reflection. His own black look shocked himself, and he relaxed his face into a regal expression. Suddenly, he heard footsteps in the hall. He hastily covered the mirror with crimson drapes, and turned to greet the visitor.

…

Vegeta made his way toward the training arena. The sun had tucked itself into the mountains as dusk settled over the kingdom. Good, Vegeta thought, the few stable servants will be gone by now, and I can train in peace. He sent a quick glance into the amber hay covered barn, where all the horses were all safely locked in their stalls. The were no people to be seen, a relief for the lone prince. The training arena was conveniently connected to the stables, a large open area used for more than just training horses, but the prince as well.

Without hesitation the prince went to work on a sturdy training dummy. His sabre effortlessly pierced the dummy. It was no challenge to fight an unmoving target, but the prince sliced away nonetheless.

With Yamcha gone, Bulma decided to fulfill her lie. She decided to fully commit to her disheveled appearance, crouching hands and knees into the earth. Good thing I've got these gloves on. A pretty girl like me shouldn't lower herself to scraping cobwebs from horse stalls! She thought to herself. Just then a loud crash startled her. It sounded like someone was in the barn with her, and… metal clashing?! In her shock she knocked her head against the hitching post and cried out. “ow!”

Grasping at the new lump on her head, she looked up.

Towering over her, the dark figure stepped closer.

“What're you doing here, boy?” the prince wiped the sweat from his forehead, sweeping the sinful black bangs of his to the side. His grimace frightened Bulma, so she averted her gaze from his face to slightly lower.

“uh, um…” she stuttered, trying hard to maintain a deep and manly voice.

The moon was bright, its rays peeked through the almost closed windows. The thin slices of moonlight draped upon the prince's upper body like luminescent ribbons. Bulma gawked at his muscles, sinuous and bulging. Spattered on his dark skin were numerous white scars. In the moonlight they shimmered as pure white as snow. His smell, while strong, was not entirely unpleasant. A mixture of lavender and perspiration overpowered the existing barn smell.

“Explain yourself, runt!” he growled and lifted his fist as a threat.

“I'm Bull, sir, I work here, I was just-"

“Sir?! How dare you speak to your prince like that! You will address me properly unless you want to die!” his powerful voice silenced the entire barn. Even the animals stood motionless in fear of such power.

Bulma’s brain took a second to comprehend the situation. The prince? She looked again at his face and instantly recognized him.

“My- Your grace,” she stumbled. The hand that grasped her head tightened to a fist as she bowed further to the ground in respect. His glare burned holes into her back.

Tch. The prince lifted his boot and stepped on Bulma’s head, forcing it into the earth, the hay, and the manure.

She died a thousand deaths while he pinned her there. I'm dead, I will die here. She lamented silently.

“I should have you killed,” Vegeta whispered menacingly. “you are to leave the palace grounds by dusk every day. If I ever catch you here, at this time again I will crush your skull with my own hands.”

He lifted his leg and swiftly kicked the stable boy in the side. Bulma yelped in agony as it knocked the wind from her lungs.

“Yes, my prince,” she wheezed, grabbing her side and stumbling to her feet. As she made her way out of the barn, tears streamed from her face. She grasped her sides tightly, and started the long trek home through the forest.

What an evil man…

To be continued...

[sakura108645]

Yandere Sinbad x Reader: The One That Denines the King:Part 1

When she first arrived to Sindria, well more she appeared out of nowhere, the king saw her wandering around, confused and scared. She was a strange one. Not a sound ever left her lips, not a sound ever left her steps, it was almost as she was ghost. And with the reactions his djiins were giving and told him that the girl had unexplainable knowledge of the world, he made up his mind to have her in his kingdom. One problem....

She avoided him like the plague and it irritated him to the fullest. So he made his quest, to make the girl speak. To hear her voice. "I've noticed you have your eyes set on certain someone." Ja'far said one days as he brought a stack of papers to his King's office. Sinbad smiles, pretending not to know. "I don't know what you're talking about?" Sinbad said back as he signed papers. Ja'far gave him a blank face and the King sweat drops. "I know you have your eyes on (Y/n), Sin. She isn't just some conquest you can conquer. And based on the just the few days she stayed here, she doesn't like being around you." Ja'far said straight to his face. "You think she may be a spy from Kou? Reim perhaps?" The king said, trying to change the subject. "Sigh.....I don't think so. She's...how do I say it....afraid of people. She looks at people with fear and is mute." He said. "Wait? What do you mean she's mute?" Sinbad said, confused.

- Garden -

"That's so pretty Miss (Y/n)!! Please teach me!" Kougyoku said as you gently gave her the flower crown you weaved using the flowers and roses you picked. "Thank you." A water bubble appeared in your hands that smelled the words out. "No thank you. You make a better teacher than Alibaba." Kougyoku giggled and Alibaba pouted. Morgiana, Aladdin, and Hakuryuu were also present. "(Y/n), why won't you talk?" Morgiana suddenly asked and you stiffened. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to upset you!" She bowed and you shook your hands to make her stop. You sighs and gave them a sad smile. Once again, you had your words spelled out into the water bubble for them to read. "Growing up, I was always looked down upon and made fun of. I was bullied and harassed for 20 years. I have no mother or father. And when I would speak, people would ignore me. I was told if I would speak, my voice would sound hideous. I endured mental, physical, and emotional for 20 years. I was always told to be silence so I stayed silent. Since then, I have not spoken for 15 years. Reading books help me run away from my reality, even if it was just for a moment." You spelled out and everyone looked at you shocked. "I was never shown kindness is receiving it, and speaking to you all, is a....overwhelming." you said and grinned crookedly. Everyone was silent and you stiffened when you felt Aladdin suddenly hug you, and put his face in your chest. "It's okay miss (Y/n). We understand. I know being with us can be overwhelming, but can take your time. You don't have to up to us right away. And I'm sure if you ever talk again one day, I'll be the prettiest voice in the world! So, take your time!" Aladdin grins to you. Tears slowly fell from your eyes and everyone began panicking and you couldn't help but cry. Feeling kindness for this moment and from now on, was the greatest joy in the was the best thing that had ever happened in your life.

--

"Okay! Seeing as you can create a water bubble, I've decided to make you my apprentice! You will be joining Aladdin when I teach him magic." Yamuraiha said happily as you stared at her. "Aaaww!! I wanted to teach her how to fly and manage the birds!" Pisti pouted and crossed her arms. "I wanted to teach her the way of the sword with Alibaba!" Sharrkan glared at Yamuraiha. The others watched as Yamraiha and Sharrkan began to argue who was going to train you. You couldn't help but smile a bit. When you told the others that would read, you would read manga and watch anime. So you knew everything that was going to happen in the future in this world. But......

"What's going on?"

You felt someone behind you and turned. It was Sinbad. Fear filled you and you quickly went towards Ja'far. "I want to teach (Y/n)!!" Pisti, Sharrkan and Yamuraiha yelled and then glared at each other. Sinbad's eye twitched as he saw you run from him again. Don't get it wrong. When you first read about Sinbad, you liked him. He is a kind man, you've read what he's gone through. But, as the story went by, you saw the actions he did were wrong and made you hate him. It's a love and hate relationship with Sinbad. But now that you are here, with the real thing, flesh and blood, you feared him. If he ever found out you are from another world, you had knowledge of the future, everything about everything and everyone, he wouldn't let you leave Sindria at all. That's why you avoided the man like the plague. But seems you are catching his interest more and more. "Really?" He said and smiles, "How about I train you personally?" Sinbad said. "HEY!!" The other three said. You shook your head. You refuse, you refuse, you refuse!!! "Oh! She rejected his offer!" Hinahoho laughed at the face Sinbad was making. "Respect her decision everyone. Alright then, who do you want to train you?" Sinbad said and smiles. You stayed silent and everyone watched as you walked up to.....and took his hand. "M-Me?!" Said person said in shock. "SPARTOS?!" Everyone said in shock. Hakuryuu smirked. "That means you'll be training with me also." Hakuryuu said and patted your head. You liked his warm touched and couldn't help but nuzzle, which made the poor boy turn red with embarrassment. You liked Hakuryuu, the boy is like a little brother to you. You smiled and hugged him to your chest, grinning and the poor boy with a bloody nose. Sinbad felt some sort of rage stir within him and then you pat the boy's head.

- A week Later -

You clashed your spear with Hakuryuu's, both of you using magoi manipulation. Spartos watched and nodded in approval. He was amazed by how quickly you picked up the spear and you combined your skills with water and sound magic, you have been given the name, Lady of The Lake. You sweat drop at the name because that name belongs to Azura from Fire Emblem Fates. "I think you should get a real spear." Hakuryuu said as both of you were taking a break. You thought for moment and turned to Spartos, who was also in thought. "I think it's a good idea. You've been using the practice ones from here, so I believe it might be time to get your own." Spartos smiles and you bowed to thank him.

During dinner, you saw all your favorite spots, that were far from Sinbad, were gone. And the only seat left was the one next to him. Sinbad smiles and you sigh and make yourself to the chair. "Glad you could join us! How's training?" Sinbad asked as he saw you sit down, but you scooted away from him. You took a bite of your food and smile. Hakuryuu must have cooked today. You picked up your cup and took a sip and immediately spit it out. "Are you alright?!" Sinbad went up to you and lightly patted your back. You coughed and shooed him away. You made a water bubble appear and spelled your words out. "I hate wine......." it said and everyone stared at you. "No worries sis! I can't drink wine yet but we can share some orange jucie together!" Aladdin said and you nodded. So you were poured a glass of orange juice and sat back down. "Ahem!" Spartos cleared his throat and everyone turned to him, "my king, I was wondering if we could go to the blacksmith's shop tomorrow for (Y/n) to obtain her own spear. She's done an excellent job in training and I believe it is time." Spartos said and you nodded. Sinbad thought for a moment then then spoke. "No need for her to go to the blacksmith. I think I have the right spear that may suite her." Sinbad said and you looked at him shocked. You shook your head, refusing anything that he offered you. "She says no. (Y/n), do you have something against the king?" Drakon asked and you shook your head. "Please understand, I do not wish to accept anything out of personal values. I grew up where I must earn my achievements." You wrote. "You've done well and you have earned it. So please, accept it." Sinbad said as he took your hand but slapped his away. He was starting to get annoyed by your attitude towards him. "I REFUSE!" You spelled in bold letters and your face showed anger and you stormed out. "Rejected once again....5 STRIKES IN A ROW!!" Sharrkan laughed.

You went to your room and slammed the door shut. You flopped onto your bed and hugged your pillow. And about to close your eyes when you suddenly felt a breeze and looked to your window, and your eyes slowly went wide. "I really am hurt (Y/n)....." Amber eyes looked at you as you sat up and with a smile.



You were frozen then........water suddenly surrounded you and turned to dragons and charged at Sinbad, which completely caught him off guard and bolted. At times like this, he wished he didn't use Zepra. While he was trying to get away from your water dragons, you huffed and shut and lock you window and locked the door to your room.

- The Next Day -

Kougyoku looked at you confused as you made a green gem go into her chest. "What's this?" She asked as pink sakura blossom appeared on her forehead. She blushed as she saw herself in your mirror, she looked like a cute shrine maiden. "I placed a protection spell on you. If anyone uses their djiin powers on you, it is completely nullified and has no effect on you." You spelled out. "Incredible! Thank you (Y/n)!" Shemsaid and hugged you. One, you truly care for her, that is why you placed the spell and to stop Sinbad's plan. The two of you left your room and of course, today Kougyoku and Sinbad would battle. A dew hours later, that actually happened. You were glad you were brought when the Zagan arc ended. Hakuryuu has Zagan, and lost his arm.... You watched as Sinbad transformed to Zepra and you made everyone go deaf with your magic to protect them, same with you. As Sinbad used Zepra, the sound hit the entire empire but......

His eyes went wide as he saw Kougyoku smirking at him. "Sorry to tell you King Sinbad, but djinn magic has no affect on me." She grins. Everyone else was confused why they didn't fall asleep. You released the spell on them and yourself. "So you have a djinn that can nullified djiin magic........" Sinbad said as the two landed and undjiin equip. You inwardly smirked and hugged Kougyoku from behind. Sinbad stared at the two you while the princess was blushing. Kougyoku is my sister! You are forbidden to touch her!" You spelled out and glared with puff cheeks at Sinbad and hugged Kougyoku tighter. Sinbad sweat drops then noticed the sakura marking on Kougyoku. "I don't remember that marking on your forehead princess. What happened?" He asked. "This is symbol that shrine maidens in Kou wear as a symbolism of peace and prosperity. It's to show that I wish for peace between our countries." Kougyoku smiles. You smile and look up to Sinbad. "I see. That is a beautiful way of showing it." He then turned to you, "(Y/n), I would like to make a deal with you." He said and everyone began to get confused. "Since you rejected the spear I wished to give you, how about this? We will have a match. If you win, you don't have to accept it and I will do whatever you want. But if I win, " he smirked and she narrowed her eyes, "you will accept it and become my second vizier." Sinbad said. The world around you froze. You clench your fist and walked up to him then....

SLAP!!!

Everyone gasped and couldn't believe what you just did. Sinbad slowly turned back to you and saw you holding in tears.

"I......"

Everyone froze as retracted your hand and glared at him, the ground underneath you frozen solid. "I am not a conquest." You said in the coldest voice ever and left.

- A Few Hours Later: Your Room -

"(Y/n)....." Kougyoku said as you had your head lying on her lap, and lightly running her fingers in your hair. You stayed silent and just relaxed in her warmth. Aladdin, Alibaba, Morgiana, and Hakuryuu were present. "We've wanted to hear your voice but....not like this..." Morgiana said as she patted your head. "Sis...uncle Sinbad is sorry.....he knows what he's done wrong....will you please accept his apology?" Aladdin said and you shook your head. You sat up and patted his head. The other day they were discussing their plans for the future. You made your choice. Tomorrow, the ship for everyone's departure leaves. You will leave, making sure none of the generals know, especially Sinbad. You will leave to Kou with Hakuryuu and Kougyoku. You already the trio and Kou siblings and they swore not to say a word. They said goodnight and left your room. You sigh and sat on your bed and opened the window a bit. You hugged your knees and began to sing....

Those days were like dreams Now you've gone Left me with a coward smile and those gentle nails

Just like those boring petals Let me forget the pain Gently, behind your back Cried and smiled

I was filled with such a strange kindness, Made me recalling those never returning days Holding back my breath inside the miniature garden

Seasons have forgotten to pass They were inside the peaceful time as if in the bottom of ocean

Freezing petals Scattering and blooming in the night How painful, Just like the white snow All the deep sorrow that befell upon you, I just want to drive them all away

I believe, I can't forgive every single creatures who have hurt you I want to back to those gentle days so much that my tears are falling Petals of flowers that we looked together have withered and fallen

Moon was hiding behind the clouds You lost your way Those eyes were about to burst into tears

If you try to combine those two parts I believe, a gentle thing will be born even from a jagged heart

You've never forgiven every single creatures who have hurt me That's all enough for me

I clang hard onto your hands that you've reached out just for a joke Finally, a warm ray of hope has lit up upon this world I gave up

Freezing petals Cutting off through the night I gather every plucked lights into a bouquet Just like a happiness I just want to scatter them all Right above you

You've promised me, right? That you'll get angry if I do something bad That's why, I believe that you'll find me once again I don't need to be in a lonely place anymore, right? Petals of flowers I looked up all alone by myself have withered and fallen    

You sang and let your tears fall. "I'm sorry......" you suddenly heard and saw Sinbad standing on the window edge. You glared and closed the window in his face and used magic to turn the glass black, so he wouldn't see inside,  Sinbad sighs and knocked on it but no response. You were packing your belongings and put them in your magic closet. "(Y/n), open the window this instant." Sinbad ordered and you glared at the window.

"You are not my king."

Fury filled him. "Open this damn window right this instant or so call help me!" He said furiously and you spoke, the voice of a queen. "You are not my king. I am not a conquest. I belong to no one." And with that, you heard the window shatter, the glass looking like rain around him. He walked up to you and both of you looked dead in the eyes. "You are no longer the same man you were once. I admire you but I despise you. I serve no one. You are a man that does not take no for an answer. Then I shall continue to be the one that says no." You said and the black rukh surrounded the two of you. Sinbad glared menacingly then chuckled. "Very well then. I----!!" He froze the instant he saw a rukh silhouette hug you and glare at him.



Zepra began reacting all of a sudden and Sinbad felt like he was looking at Serendine. You closed your eyes and pointed out the door and spoke.

"Leave."

- The Next Day -

"WHAT?!" Sinbad yelled as all the generals stiffened. It's been 8 hours since the boat left and you were nowhere to be found. "We checked her room and all her belongings are gone. But she left a note that she is going with Morgiana." Spartos said. But he lied on the part of Morgiana. He knows you are heading to Kou and respected your decision. Sinbad gritted his teeth. His plan....ruined! Everything was ruined! His plan to use the Kou princess, his plan to get information out of you....everything! When he woke up this morning.....

"My queen has returned. Forgive me king Sinbad but I shall return to her. For she is my one true King."

Zepra disappeared from his ring and left to who knows where. Most likely with you. He swore he'll get you back and make you his. If you are the spider then he is the one that can kill it.

- With you -

You had Kougyoku come with you and Hakuryuu as the three of you rode your horses to the army base that Hakuei was at. You didn't want Kougyoku to be endanger, that's why you had her come with you and Hakuryuu. You touched the golden and beautiful spear you had secretly made for you, and was now, your metal vessel. "For my true Queen has return! I shall serve you till the very end!" Zepra said cheerfully and smiled. The three of you stopped near a village to restock on supplies. You sat down and closed your eyes.

You were transported to a labyrinth of pink spider lilies and there, standing in the center of the labyrinth, was Serendine. You walked up to her and smile. "I'm you're alright. Sinbad has changed so much. He isn't the same man as before." She said and you nodded. "It seems I'm on his...to kill list." You cringed. Serendine chuckled and walked up to you and clasp your hands. "He won't hurt you. That man has an interest with you. What do you plan to do from now on? You won't see him for an entire year till the war of Magnoshat." She said worried. You smiled and pointed to your metal vessel. "I can assure you that I will protect her!" Zepra said. "I will, stay three months in Kou, then 3 in Reim, 3 in Partevia, and three in Magnoshutatt." You said and she grins. "Sounds like an adventure to me! I will teach you my countries studies of poisons. I think you will like it." She winked and you giggle.

You opened your eyes and saw Kougyoku speaking to Hakuryuu about the cute bunny sweets that she bought. You smile and looked up to the sky, unknown to you, Sinbad was too looking at the sky from his kingdom. He smiles as he walked back to his room, where he had a shirt that belonged to you on his bed. He picked it up and smelled it. The scent of jasmins and spider lillies, but also cherries. He licked his lips. He can see it. You, squirming underneath him as he ravished you and had you screaming his name at the top of your lungs. He chuckled darkly and already had a room prepared for you. One that only he can enter......

"Soon my sweet spider lily......you will soon be the maiden that I deflower and make mine for all eternity....."

(To be continued......)

Why this popped up in my head, I don't know. Still crying over new Sinbad no Bouken chapter that was released......WHAAAAAAA!!!! MY SMOL BEAN MYSTRAS!!!!😭😭😭 OKTAHA YOU SADIST!! 😡😡😡😠😠 So those that have requested for halloween, I may not finish them all by that day, but I will keep working on them and publish them till I am done! Also, I noticed that you guys like my Masrur and Natsumi pair from my story, Change it All, and will release a one shot of them soon!! Till then, enjoy!

[stuffandsundry]

Alt. P5 Justice Confidant

okay. okayokayokay IM GOOD, IM READY THIS TIME, I HAVE NOTES, BUCKLE IN OUT ALL AROUND YALL.

so a weekish ago i made this vaguely incoherent post about how Goro Akechi’s confidant could be improved, and I’m back now, armed with coffee and a slightly more coherent statement. Spoilers under the cut.

(I haven’t fact-checked everything here, so if I get something wrong, sorry. I just don’t feel like going through 100+ hours of footage for what’s essentially a vent post, haha. Aight lets get into it)

First things first: I don’t actually hate Goro Akechi-- I kinda neutralish like him, tbh. I am, however, in a constant state of seething rage about how grossly mishandled his whole everything is. Conceptually, I think he’s an interesting character, and a good foil to the Phantom Thieves.... as a whole. And that. That right there? Is one of my problems with Akechi. By setting him up as a foil to the protagonist alone, they weaken his characterization.

The thing about Persona protags in general is that by and large, they’re mostly silent observers up to a point within their own stories. You can project your own headcanons onto them as much as you like-- heavens know that I’ve seen dozens of Yus or Soujis or Minatos floating around. Some are heavily based in canon, some are just what the fans thought was cool, and that’s great! Creativity rocks! But... Akechi’s entire deal-- the way that he reacted to gaining a Persona and access to the Metaverse? It’s intrinsically tied into his backstory, which P5 Protag by necessity has the bare minimum of.

You can argue that Goro and Protag are both victims of a corrupt system, and that as foils it shows how working within the system doesn’t work and sometimes you just need to go “fuck youuuu”, but listen, if that’s the criteria, P5 Protag is a better foil for Goro’s mom. Made one mistake that ruined their life and branded tham a pariah, we don’t know much about their life beforehand, tried to keep their head down and deal. And while Protag eventually rebelled, and found compatriots in that rebellion, Goro’s mother didn’t, and stayed alone, and died. Essentially, what I’m trying to say is that sure, Protag and Akechi both victims. But the injustices perpetrated against Akechi and Protag are different.

Which isn’t a huge problem. It could still work-- it does, up to a point.

But.

The rest of the Phantom Thieves are right there. You want foils? Literally half of the roster of the Phantom Thieves would make great foils!!!

Ann-- both think that it’s better for an abuser to live and suffer the consequences rather than escape into death. And depending on how exactly Goro feels about his mother, fighting because of revenge, too.

Ryuji-- relationship with fame, mom: ryuji has a loving mother, desires recognition for efforts as part of the Thieves, Akechi has the adoration of the masses, but he’ll never get his parents’ approval

Makoto-- wanting Sae’s approval vs having Sae’s approval but being indifferent towards it, both methodical, logic-minded, and good at school/hard workers, but impulsive at times as well.

Futaba-- on the record, both lost their mothers to suicide, supposedly because they couldn’t stand the shame of having had a child out of wedlock (though this isn’t at all true for Wakaba). The hecked up irony of Akechi taking away what Futaba had and making her just like him.

Yusuke-- I can’t come up with anything truly substantial off the top of my head, but there’s potential for Yusuke knowing that something was up with Madarame and choosing to not believe it vs Goro knowing that Shido was a shithead from the beginning and jumping in anyways

Haru-- maybe something to do with how she found out about the Metaverse and immediately tried to do something about her father using it, same as Goro probably did.

The point is, there’s a better way to characterize Goro, and that’s to have him interact more with your teammates, not by having the focus be on his interactions with the Protag. Because we know why our teammates react to things the way that they do. And by having Goro talk to them, we can get better characterization by observing the way that he plays off them, rather than having “Akechi walks over and monologues at me sometimes, and I understand him better because of that (no i don’t)”. Which brings me to another point, actually. Teammate interaction means that conversations with Akechi are far less one-sided than they are in the majority of interactions Protag has with him. Again-- the protagonist is mostly passive because he’s a partial player insert, and I totally get that. But the way that you’re only really given short dialogue options, while Akechi is clearly trying to get some sort of reaction from you (im pretty sure he believes that you and the gang are the PT as early as his Rank 2) gives me a really strong impression of “oh god it’s this guy again please go away”, which I’m sure isn’t the writer’s intention. But still. I Don’t Like It.

There are very few mostly-innocuous things that get my hackles up faster than feeling like I’m beholden to listen to somebody talk. The other two automatic confidants don’t do this to me because they’re very clearly story-related from the beginning, I know they’re going to happen, I have a general idea of how it’s going to go. Akechi just comes out of nowhere and tries to get a reaction out of me like he’s the heckin Spanish Inquisition. Do you know how much it sucks to have some person decide that you’re their friend (or fated rival or w/e), and that that gives them the right to approach you out of nowhere to vent or prod at you to see how you’ll react, and you can’t tell them hey, maybe don’t? Because that’s how I feel about his confidant. Listen, at least if you don’t like Ryuji or Kawakami or Makoto any other confidant, you aren’t obligated to progress them.

So how do you fix this? There’s two options that I favor:

You don’t make his confidant automatic, or

You make his confidant Goro Akechi vs. The Phantom Thieves instead of just Goro

I want to talk about the second option. Let Protag’s teammates carry the conversation! Akechi espouses a kind of Justice that members of the PT can’t agree with, to varying degrees. Some members may understand where he’s coming from more than others (say, Makoto or Ryuji, respectively) but the members of the PT were in circumstances such that if the Phantom Thieves had not existed, the corrupted system could not have resolved their personal injustices. And there’s something interesting to be found in this clash of ideaology! It would help to characterize both Akechi and your teammates!!

It wouldn’t even be that hard to change-- out of his 10 confidants, something like 6 or 7 of them are already group scenes! Just... just have him talk more with your teammates instead of hyperfixiating on you! That’s it! That’s all you needed to do!

Giving your teammates more interaction with Akechi also makes their abrupt change of opinion of him less (???) too! Because it implies that they were forced to re-evaluate all their previous interactions with him based on the information that he gives before and during his boss battle-- have one of them make a reference to that, afterwards. Like Haru’s ‘I understand where you’re coming from now, but also I still can’t forgive you’, but with more background behind it. Akechi making cryptic remarks about bad parents in the past and Ryuji or Yusuke or Futaba going “ah. i can understand you better now” after the battle.

Augh.

Anyways. Thanks for stickin with me until the end of this friggin monster. I.... should go do actual work now, bye.

[btsfanficss]

Stay Professional! Pt. 11

Work AU! Fluff, Angst and smut: Jungkook x Reader

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 (12 has arrived! )

Summary: Jungkook desperately tries to fix his mistakes. Whether it be through his irresistibly sweet speeches or something a little more, you were bound to fall under his spell again. 

A/N: Yes I am back! Did y’all miss me? 😘 I honestly think the mothers are the best characters ever tbh (ultimate wingwoman goals). Sorry I didn’t update for so long- I had my Semester 1 exams :) As always, feedback is appreciated! 

Jungkook knew that there was nothing he could do. So why did it feel like he was waiting for a miracle to occur? He rhythmically tapped on the dark mahogany table with his slender finger, tension built up to his shoulders. He felt as though he was going to snap at any given moment. And he hated the feeling. He couldn’t stand the nausea that bestowed upon him when he thought about you. At least he knew he fucked up this time.

“Jungkook, may I come in?” A familiar voice interrupted his toxic thoughts. He quickly glanced in the direction of the elegant voice and a small smile of relief spread across his lips.

“Of course mother.” He gave her a nod of affirmation before standing up to greet her properly.

“You’re probably wondering what brings me here.” She smiled warmly at him and closed the door behind her before seating herself across Jungkook’s table.

“Sit, son. We have some talking to do.” She spoke in a gentle tone- but Jungkook was beyond intimidated. He felt like he was 4 years old again, getting lectured and scolded. But this time it was worse because it wasn’t Jimin lecturing him, it was Jungkook’s actual mother- whom before had no time to do that.

He gulped noticeably loud before looking behind his mother’s shoulder and he avoided her gaze completely.

“Is it possible for us to do this tomorrow? I’m really not feeling good today.” He confessed and his mother raised an eyebrow.

“Did you think I was here to lecture you?”

There was a small pause that intensified Jungkook’s childish fear. Despite being a grown man, Jungkook didn’t deal with authorities well because it was abnormal to have people of higher status than him.

“You’re not wrong my darling but that’s not my main intention. I’m here as a mother today. How about we sort things out together?” She suggested in a sweetened voice and gently placed her hand on top of Jungkook’s and his trembling stopped.

“As you may also be aware, I wasn’t very happy when I found out that Y/N left the company. I assumed it was because of you- you do have a reputation for firing assistants quite regularly so I wasn’t surprised. But she had so much potential and she brought out the best in you so I was generally upset when you fired her. Not to mention, you looked so much happier with her around.”

“For one, I didn’t fire her. She left because Jimin offered her a job at his company. He told her that she was a burden to me and so she left.”

“Then why did you tell me that you fired her?” His mother sounded genuinely confused. And before Jungkook could reply, she answered for him with sparkling eyes.

“You were trying to protect her image.” Her voice squeaked in relief.

“Oh thank god!” She placed her hand over her thumping chest and a smile stretched across her relieved face.

“This whole time I was worried because I thought my son turned into a maniacal and heartless business man! Thank goodness you have some sort of consideration for others.” She fanned her face and sighed in relief.

“You can’t be serious, mother.” Jungkook chuckled and his mother laughed.

“Oh honey I am. Before Y/N you were so.. artificial. Sometimes I felt regretful because I thought I changed you for the worse. My son, you are still very young; I know the pressure I’m putting on you and though keeping a cool head and being detached from your emotions when doing business is an advantage.. you’re my only child and I can’t afford to let greed consume you.” She confessed and Jungkook suddenly softened his gaze as his mother gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

Jungkook’s adorable smile warmed her heart instantly and she felt obligated to continue.

“I think I know my son well enough to say that you’re head over heels for that girl. What are you waiting for? Get her back. Don’t tell me I raised a loser, now did I?” She quirked an eyebrow and the original smirk that Jungkook inherited spread across her features.

Jungkook let out a hearty laugh and craned his neck back to hit the cushion of his leather seat. “So you approve of her?”

“Darling, it’s not a matter of my approval at this point because even if I said no, I highly doubt you’re going to get over her before my whole company burns down because your shitty reports.” She giggled and Jungkook cringed at the truthfulness in her savagery.

“I’m glad we had this talk. At least now I know my son isn’t a complete asshole. I expect to see you in top notch condition soon- invite her over while you can. I don’t know how long this 'approval’ will last.” She answered in a cheerful tone and quickly walked off after checking the time on her phone.

“Good luck Jungkook! Not only for the sake of you but for the sake of my company, get her back please. For the love of God child, this better fix your recent concentration issue.” Her voice diminished as she strutted further down the long hall outside of Jungkook’s office. And for the first time since the incident, he felt as though he could take on the world again.

You squinted your eyes in confusion, brows furrowed into a deep ‘V’ shape as you tried to make out the unrecognisable figure that sat comfortable on the jet-black motorbike. The person was wearing black from head to toe, his jacket that had extra padding made him appear even more buff and the tinted helmet successfully hid his identity. He took off his shiny leather gloves to unclasp the buckle of his motorbike helmet. And within a couple of seconds, he managed to pull off the tight helmet. You could hardly believe your eyes.

There sat Jungkook, looking ridiculously irresistible on his black motorbike that was shined to perfection as it reflected sunlight into your eyes. Jungkook shook his head to get his fringe out of his eyes. His noir locks bounced back in place and he fixed his fringe before casually striding up next to you with the familiar bunny smile you were so obsessed with. His ‘bad-boy’ demeanour certainly didn’t fit that childish smile. He presented two clashing charms.. and maybe that’s what made him even more charming.

“Hey.” He smiled and scanned your expression in an attempt to read your thoughts. You could only raise an eyebrow in response to his sudden and very random appearance.

“What are you doing here?” You asked, breath hitched as you couldn’t believe your sight. Jungkook looked so divine in his all black motorbike attire, but nothing could match up to his charming smirks and smiles you’d missed so much but was too afraid to admit.

“I’m here to see you.” His smile dropped and he suddenly looked very serious. It felt so wrong to think that he looked so deadly handsome in that black leather jacket. It wasn’t the time to fawn over his beauty, it was time to act logically.

“Jungkook.. I told you I need time to think.” You sighed, a little frustrated at his persistence but at the same time, a little relieved because it showed you that he was desperate and that he really did care.

“I know I know.. you don’t have to give me an answer now but I just.. wanted to see you.” He said with an undeniably handsome smirk smeared across his lips.

“We both know you don’t have time for that.”

“But I’m making time for it-.”

“Don’t you have somewhere you need to be?” You crossed your arms in defence and shifted your weight to one leg, some sassy body language that Jungkook found adorable.

“You’re right... maybe I shouldn’t have ran away.” He chuckled lightly, as though what he’d just done wasn’t a big deal.

“What? Are you crazy?! Did you really come all the way here without telling anyone?” Your jaw dropped in disbelief.

“I thought you’d find it romantic.” He smirked again and you could feel an annoying blush creep up your face.

“Jungkook that’s so stupid! You know what you’re doing right now is completely careless and irresponsible! This is going to be your company--”

“--but you’re my future, Y/N.” He cut you off with a deep voice and took a step closer to you. He touched his forehead with yours and you felt the butterflies go haywire inside your stomach from him being stood so close. Jungkook intertwined his fingers with yours and pressed a soft kiss onto the back of your hand.

Fuck, why did that always seem to work? You couldn’t help but roll your eyes- not because he was being cheesy, but because you knew that you loved every second of it.

No words could come out of your mouth so you just continued to stare blankly at him. Jungkook felt so relieved that you didn’t push him away and so a warm smile emerged from the bottom of his heart.

“Am I.. interrupting something?” Your mother’s voice called out from behind and you immediately shook your hand away from his, an evident blush of crimson on your cheeks.

“Ye- I mean no. No, mum it’s alright. We’re not doing anything.” You stuttered uncontrollably as you could feel Jungkook sneak up closer from behind. Did he have no concept of personal space?

“That’s a little suspicious.” She laughed and made eye-contact with Jungkook behind your shoulder. “And who might this handsome bloke be?”

Jungkook happily walked over to your mother and bowed his head in respect before charming his way through another life-situation. It always seemed to work for him. But you weren’t surprised since he had such a face..

“I’m Jeon Jungkook, ma’am. I’m very delighted to meet you.” He raised his head to meet her eyes with a gentle smile.

“O-Oh..” Your mother’s eyes widened in shock. “I’ve heard lots about you, dear.” She covered her mouth and giggled.

“That’s not very good.” Jungkook laughed and ruffled the hair on the back of his head, which was something he often did only when he was nervous.

“I’ve made some pretty terrible mistakes but.. I’m changing. I’m willing to change if it means that I can make Y/N happy.” He said through a gummy smile and your mother seemed a little speechless.

All she’s heard from you was all the negatives. You’d told her that Jungkook was a merciless and careless business man with no real heart but the man that stood in-front of her was someone completely different. You once never mentioned to her about Jungkook’s chivalry or professionalism. Or once never mentioned the fact that he was bloody gorgeous.

“That’s.. lovely.. it’s getting cold outside. Let’s warm ourselves up with some tea, shall we?” Your mother suggested and you immediately spoke up in objection.

“No mum. He needs to get back to his company asap. If his mother found out that he’s here I’m going to get a death sentence- I can’t afford to ruin my life even more.”

“I rode all the way here. You can’t expect me to just leave right now. It took me 4 and a half hours to ride here Y/N.” Jungkook defended himself in a desperate attempt to gain your sympathy.

You grumbled in frustration and stormed inside, a little defeated that you were going to have to talk to him. Your mother led him into your small house in which you grew up in and Jungkook’s happiness radiated from him at the sight of your baby pictures he eyed when he arrived in the living room.

“Please, make yourself at home.” Your mother insisted and Jungkook didn’t even sit down, he went straight for your neatly framed child-hood photographs.

You were too grumpy to notice the heart-eyes Jungkook had looking at your baby photos. His heart had never felt so touched before.

“Oh my god you were adorable.” He chuckled lightly before picking up another frame to analyse. “I can’t say much has changed.” He looked over his shoulder to see you sat comfortably on the sofa, legs and arms crossed.

“Oh please Jungkook. A couple of smooth words isn’t going to fix this mess.” You turned your head the other way so your inner-thoughts would stop complimenting how good he looked.

“I realise.” He sat down next to you and twiddled his thumbs around each other. What an unusual habit. You’d never noticed his cute little habits when he got nervous because it was very rare for someone like Jungkook to lose his composure. But that certainly wasn’t the case when he was around you.  

Your mother sat directly across from Jungkook and stirred her freshly brewed tea. You could practically sense the fear, judging from Jungkook’s fastened thumb twiddling. 

“So tell me dear, why should I trust you with my daughter.” Your mother got straight to the point and Jungkook gulped in response. 

“Because..” He planned out a million different ways to respond inside his head but nothing seemed to come out of his mouth. 

“I love her.” He said blankly. It was the only thing that seemed to slip out- his nerves were getting the worse of him and you didn’t know what to think of the situation. 

“How are you so sure?” She asked and calmly sipped on the warm tea. 

“I..I’ve never felt so sure in my life. I’ve never felt like this for anyone. I didn’t want to admit that I had feelings for her at the start because.. I didn’t know if someone like me was capable of being genuine..” Jungkook found it nearly impossible to peel his gaze off of his now semi-warm cup of tea. 

“I.. Before Y/N, I felt completely detached from the world. Everything felt very grey... cold and colourless.” Jungkook finally looked at your mother straight in the eyes and she could tell that he wasn’t lying about his feelings.

“Then what do you plan to do next?” 

“I plan on making it clear to Y/N that I am sincere about my feelings. I know I’ve made many terrible mistakes but I’m determined to persuade her that I’m serious about her. I’m willing to do anything that’ll get her to change her mind about me.” He looked over to you with a desperate gaze and you looked away immediately, unable to handle his convincing voice. 

You just squeezed yourself tighter and your mother could tell that his smooth-talk seemed to be working. But it shouldn’t, especially not after how he broke your trust. 

“Shouldn’t you be back in the office with Yujung or whatever her name was?” You sounded terribly petty but you didn’t seem to care. And neither did your mother.

“I fired her.” He interrupted before you could continue to give him shit. 

You just rolled your eyes in response but deep down you were so very relieved of that. “I’m very sorry.. I wasn’t thinking straight and I know I hurt you- it wasn’t intentional I promise.” Jungkook shuffled closer but you inched further away from him and he let out a sigh of defeat. 

There was a heavy silence that added extra tormenting weight onto Jungkook’s already heavy shoulders. Your mother just continued to drink her tea and you hadn’t even touched yours, similar to Jungkook’s situation. He slowly stood up from the sofa and lowered his head greatly to your mother. 

“Thank you for giving me a chance to express myself.” He lifted himself up from the deep bow and sighed again upon the sign of you, curled up into a ball; still evidently annoyed with him. “It was lovely seeing you again, Y/N.” He smiled weakly and placed a gentle kiss on the top of your head before he ruffled your hair affectionately. You could only pretend to not care but obviously your body couldn’t hide the glowing ecstatic feelings within.  

“Leaving so soon?” Your mother suddenly asked in a bold voice. His ears perked up at the unexpected question. 

“Yes ma’am. I was only briefly visiting to cure my sanity for a little while.” He admitted selfishly and your mother seemed to appreciate that. 

“It’s already getting dark. It’d be terribly rude of us to just let you leave at this time, especially since it’s four and a half hours ride from here.” She placed her tea cup down and analysed your reaction to her surprising words. 

“I suggest you stay over and leave in the morning.” She smiled and your mouth dropped open at her bewildering suggestion. She could see both of your facial expressions change in confusion. 

“Pardon?” Was all Jungkook could ask as a happy smile seemed to peak through from just the thought of spending the night under the same roof as you. 

“I’m just saying.. I don’t want to be responsible for your safety, dear. From the things that I’ve heard from my daughter, you seem to be a very important person so- I don’t plan on taking any risks regarding your safety.” She admitted and the amusement in her voice continued to grow. 

“Mum he’s a grown man. He can handle himself just fine. It’d be worse if he stayed here because the entire company’s probably already freaking out.” 

“I’m sure Jungkook is aware of that. But I still think he should stay the night. What do you think, Jungkook?” Your mother eyed him curiously and his smile radiated joy. 

“I.. You’re right. I suppose it is getting too dark. But I can only stay if Y/N agrees to let me.” He looked over to you and you sank deeper into the warm couch. You pretended to groan in frustration and stormed out of the living room quickly before anyone could catch a glimpse of relief on your face. You’d secretly wished for him to stay a little longer. 

“She didn’t exactly say no.” Your mother pat his shoulder kindly before cleaning up the cups of full tea that’d turned cold. 

You’d come back from a brisk walk that cleared your mind. Jungkook’s charms were seriously effective and you’d decided to keep your distance from him even though he’d be sleeping under your roof for that night. You carelessly kicked off your shoes and placed the plastic bag that had some groceries from your small walk onto the cold wooden floor. You picked them up, opened the fridge and placed the eggs and milk in their usual places whilst humming a happy tune to yourself. 

You strolled over and opened your bedroom door and your humming came to a sudden stop. 

There stood Jungkook, both of you frozen at the sudden appearance of each other. Except you were more shocked because he was shirtless. Jungkook had a white towel carelessly wrapped around his waist and another towel over his head. You traced your eyes over his impressive chest and soon had heart eyes for his defined abs. Jungkook was completely frozen in place, his biceps evident from the way he used the towel to dry his wet hair. You brought your eyes back up to meet Jungkook’s and by that time, your face turned completely red. His pink lips were parted ever so slightly and his eyes widened in astonishment. 

Heaven had blessed your eyes and your heart thumped violently within your chest. You quickly slammed the bedroom door before neither one of you could say anything. “I’m sorry!” You instinctively yelled out and buried your hot face into your now clammy palms. Jesus you did not expect that. 

After a couple seconds of quick shuffling, there was a sound of quick footsteps on your wooden floor and then suddenly, a strong aroma had hit you. Jungkook had opened the door and he was slightly out of breath from rushing to get dressed. You could tell he looked a little tired from the way his chest would rise and fall quickly when he let out breathy apologies. 

“I didn’t know I left the door open.” He chuckled and you could feel his minty fresh breath against your flushed face. You swore to yourself that you wouldn’t be shaken up by his charms but that was impossible when he looked so handsome and smelt absolutely divine. You didn’t know your shampoo could even smell that good. Or perhaps, that was just Jungkook’s natural scent. 

“I’m sorry. I promise it was an accident. I’m not planning anything.” He panicked a little because you were being so quiet. You just wanted to shut him up because his voice sounded alluring enough, not to mention his scent. He was wearing the same clothes for before and it smelt of his usual, expensive cologne. 

“It’s fine. Sorry I should’ve knocked.” You blabbered and tried to calm down your ridiculously fast paced heart. You felt as though you could happily drown yourself in his scent. 

“Don’t apologise, it’s your bedroom. It doesn’t make sense for you to knock.” Jungkook leaned onto your door frame and you looked up at him to see him smile a little. His confidence had grown suddenly as he stood very tall over your small frame. 

“You’re right. Can you please leave for a moment. I need to get changed.” You coughed and Jungkook let you through. “Can I watch?” He said playfully and you slammed the door at him in response. You heard him chuckle through the door and your heart softened slightly from his childish comment. 

It was well past 10 o’ clock and you were convinced that Jungkook was already fast asleep on the floor-mattress just a couple of metres from your bed. You asked him to sleep on your bed instead of the mattress but he refused to do so, so there you were; warmly wrapped up in blankets yet your mind refused to let you fall asleep. 

All you could hear in the quiet room was the sound of Jungkook’s soft and even breathing that sounded tranquil to the ears mixed with the consistent muted sound of the clock ticking from outside the room. You let out a small sigh and felt a little frustrated that you were unable to fall asleep. You’d been trying to rest for the past hour but nothing seemed to work. Perhaps it was the fact that Jeon Jungkook was right next to you that you couldn’t relax. 

You rolled over for what felt like the 100th time and closed your eyes in another attempt to fall asleep. After some more time and a couple more shuffles on the bed, your brain was starting to feel too tired to stay awake. Finally, your eyelids started to feel a little heavy. 

You closed your lids and your mind started to drift in and out of consciousness. You heard a muted shuffle and suddenly, you felt a body stealthily slide under your blanket. Jungkook casually put the blanket over the both of you and inched closer to you as he cuddled you closely from behind. He proved that indeed 2 people could fit snugly on a single sized bed. The realisation set in and you were wide-awake at the point but you pretended to be fast asleep. You didn’t want to admit that you wanted him to stay close to you. 

Jungkook’s body felt warm. He was the big spoon and had his warm chest pressed up against your back. Jungkook’s rested his head on your shoulder and you could feel his warm breath gently tickle your exposed neck. You mumbled softly at the comforting sensation and Jungkook could feel a chuckle bubble up inside of him. You then turned around slowly so you were directly facing him. You curled up closer into his chest and the scent of your hair seemed to push Jungkook’s buttons. 

You could hear the rhythmic beat of Jungkook’s heart and you were practically screaming at yourself inside for how wrong this was but how right it felt dominated that. Jungkook shifted his arms slowly so that one arm casually pulled the two bodies closer and this action encouraged you to gently grip on his black cotton fabric of his t-shirt. He found that absolutely adorable and ran his hand through your hair, comforting you in a way that was beyond ineffable.

You simply inched closer to his him until your forehead was touching his toned chest. He continued to comb his fingers through your soft and sweet scented hair that drove him to the brink of insanity. But to be fair, his natural scent was the same for you- god he smelt like absolute heaven. Jungkook’s cheeks were getting tired from smiling since you’d cuddled up to him and he couldn’t refrain from kissing you. 

He placed multiple delicate kisses on your head and forehead as he drew random patterns onto your back. Jungkook couldn’t describe in words how content he felt to have you in his arms once again. He felt as though he was taking advantage of your unconscious state but what he didn’t know was that you were awake the whole time. And you loved it equally as much as he did. 

All you had to do now was, admit it. 

Long awaited Part 12 is here!

[interracial-datingproject-blog]

An Essay on Personal Conflicts

People say opposites attract, but if that was true, then why do we see so few interracial couples? Often, couples that come from different races bring together very different cultures and backgrounds, leading to a clash of ideals and ideas. This clashing is often much more than these couples can take, leading to early breakups on relationships packed with potential. However, when both partners manage to keep an open idea, something new and special can be created. Personal cultural differences can cause strains to appear in interracial relationships,  but compromises, patience, and acceptance of each other’s cultures will lead to a wonderful life together.

Interracial relationships can be a difficult thing to navigate. Every relationship requires compromise, but this may be even more true for those of different cultures. When choosing to be with someone of a different culture, one is opening themselves up to a different experience and outlook on life. As cited in Medley, B., Reviere, R., Stackman, V. (2016) Current national surveys indicate that about 85% of people ages 18 to 29 approve of interracial dating, and few young Americans say that similar racial and ethnic backgrounds are important in their choice of mates To see how many sacrifices, and what they entailed, anecdotal evidence was collected. Two people, both in interracial relationships, were asked about their experiences and compromises made within these relationships and how it has affected their lives. To keep anonymity the two women will be referred to as A and L. When asked how they met their significant other, A said that she had met him through her best friend while L said that they had met through work. A is a Hispanic woman who is currently in an interracial relationship with a Korean man. When asked about the first cultural differences she first experienced in their relationship she mentioned the food, “his family eats a lot of sushi, which I did not like when we first met but is now one of my favorite foods.”  She explained how she was sort of off-put by the new food experiences but that it eventually became part of her life as much as his. She had also explained how the language barrier was frightening at first. The grandmother of her significant other speaks little English while his mother does speak English, but often speaks in Korean. She talked about how it can be scary being around people you want to impress when you do not even speak their language. L, who is also a Hispanic woman, is in a relationship with a white woman and could not relate as much to experiencing new cultures. It was also asked how they dealt with these new changes and experiences. A said that she would “try to spend time with his grandma in order for her to get a sense of what kind of person I am” while L said that she tries to include her significant other in her family's traditions as she knows that her significant other does not have many of her own. It was also asked if they have incorporated any of their significant other traditions into their own daily lives. A said that she now eats tons of sushi and listens to KPOP, Korean Pop Music which she had not listened to before. Now she and her friends enjoy watching music videos and going to KPOP concerts. L said that there are not really any traditions for her to incorporate, but she has started to bring her significant other to her family’s special events, such as making tamales on Christmas. She said that she enjoys being able to show someone new experiences and cultures because it brings them closer. Overall, both women said that they are extremely happy in their relationships and that there must always be a compromise, but if you are open to new experiences then it may lead to new likings and hobbies of your own.

The struggles of being in an interracial relationship are also shown through popular social media sites like YouTube. A very popular one that I watched recently was Yappie, by WongFuProductions. The show contains a very realistic depiction of Black women dating an Asian man. One of the main issues they face in the show is the lack of respect of the boyfriend by the girlfriend’s friends. One of the girlfriend’s exes immediately started making racist jokes at the expense of the boyfriend, saying things like “Ching Chong” and “dog eater”. However, this couple got past this incident by leaving the premises and cutting off negative influences. Another friend told the boyfriend that not all people think like the ex; not that all people are that racist. Sometimes when there are negative influences in life, it is best to just cut them off. Another issue that this couple faces is the fact that all the boyfriend’s friends just assume that he is only dating the girl just because of her race. This issue is resolved by the friends, along with the members of the relationship, accepting everyone for who they are as individuals, rather than who they are as a race. This includes things like assuming that someone likes something or is good at something because of their race. Another YouTube video that describes how people get past culture differences is called “Intercultural Couples on Miscommunication”. The video starts off with people describing the problems they faced in the beginning of their relationships. This includes things ranging from thinking that hair is a weave to another race being a lot more adventurous in bed. A huge issue for all these couples was the language barrier. Different words have different connotations in different cultures. Sometimes, a sentence could be interpreted in a way that it wasn’t supposed to. The way that all these couples got past this is by being patient. Each of them was very understanding about these understandings, and after a while of being together, they eventually learned about each other’s quirks. With patience, any amount of differences can be overcome.

We can also find cross-cultural couples’ difficulty in the youtube video [Interracial Couples Talk Family] this video was about interracial couples share awkward moments and weird traditions'. It was pretty hilarious for me to watch this video and see slight conflicts between two people from different culture background. Personally, I think being with someone from a different country than yourself is quite amusing and interesting. It would never get boring, because of the differences in the 2 different countries, the culture, the language barrier, etc. interracial couple would always have something to giggle and laugh about. Also, the interracial couple can interact with other couples like them. It will certainly spread a positive effect on other people if a video like this talk about and share funny stories about each habit and manners and cultures from each country. However,  the video has also pointed out that sometimes interracial couples face some misunderstandings and little arguments, mostly because of the language barrier. Some couple in this video see this as a benefit because they can learn the other language, if you ever have children, they can be raised with more languages, we automatically get to know the other culture. It gives as the messages that all those great benefits can be a stressful disadvantage at the same time.

The level of difficulty of interracial marriages depends a great deal on the level of commitment, preparation, flexibility, patience, and effort of the people involved. The more of all of those things that are brought to the marriage, the less “difficult” it will be.

If you enter such a marriage without ever talking about ethnicity and culture with your intended, you are probably in for a bumpy road and difficult time. If you devote time and effort to understanding how your different ethnicities create different expectations of marriage and of the roles of each person in a marriage, you’ll be able to build a partnership that works for both of you. It also prepares each spouse to be able to run interference with their families of origin, in order to prevent unfair criticism from being leveled at their partners. That said, an interracial marriage can be a beautiful thing to experience. Aside from the benefits of companionship, affection, and care that are part of any marriage, interracial marriage brings a deep awareness of another culture, when done right.

Differences will eventually arise with every couple, but interracial couples have to deal with huge cultural differences that other couples do not have to. However, with a little patience and understanding, they will find that they can get past them. This is shown through interviews and online sources. All relationships will have bumps in the road, but how long they will last depends on how hard the partners are willing to fight.

References Stackman, V. R., Reviere, R., & Medley, B. C. (2016). Attitudes Toward Marriage, Partner Availability, and Interracial Dating Among Black College Students From Historically

Black and Predominantly White Institutions. Journal of Black Studies, 47(2), 169-192. doi:10.1177/0021934715623520

Videos of Interest

Yappie (Minutes 1:05-3:00)

Intercultural Miscommunication (Minutes 1:20-2:50)

[avanelry-blog]

Pro-life vs. Pro Choice in Borovoy’s Beyond Choice: A New Framework for Abortion

Thesis

Amy Borovoy succeeds to bring out her arguments in her article Beyond Choice: A New Framework for Abortion shows the struggle between bearing and aborting the child. The dominant tone she have showed is the involvement, emotional, and is straight-forward.

 Introduction          

“The topic is fraught in any context, but given the polarized politics of “life” vs. “choice” to which U.S. students have been exposed, Japan reveals intriguing contradictions.” The dignity of the mother is at stake in this situation. The article Beyond Choice: A New Framework for Abortion shows the struggle between bearing and aborting the child. The dominant tone she have showed is the involvement, emotional, and is straight-forward. Amy Borovoy set this as a conflict between the good and evil, explaining how abortion is the mother’s choice because every mother knows what is best for the child and for the rest of the family. Borovoy brought up that the mother knows what is best for the child so ultimately it is her choice whether to abort the child or foster it. Borovoy made many effective points on why the U.S should follow the Japanese way of considering abortion, but there were definitely two sides to every point. Politics have different opinions whether it is positive or negative charges and exhorts the readers to use their empathetic imagination to comprehend both values—life and choice.

 Discussion

           The contrast of good and bad begins with choice and decision. Borovoy continues with the introduction of abortion that has become such a divisive social issue. Borovoy makes a genuine effort to rise above the fray and to provide a way beyond the clash of absolutes. "Barack Obama's 2010 reassertion of Bill Clinton's statement that we should make abortion "safe,legal, and rare" reflects a liberal attempt to recognize the moral dimension of the problem while holding on to a "right" that in many places in the United States is a "right" in name only." According to Barack Obama of Bill Clinton’s statement that the state should make abortion “safe, legal and rare” families, not the government, should be the ones making the decision. On terms of abortion, there is in fact a set of rules in place. Unfortunately, no neutral point of view is possible on this issue. Though Borovoy attempts to be open-minded, her own “pro-choice” position is crystal-clear. Borovoy’s central assertion that there is a “clash of absolutes” is not acceptable to readers with “pro-life” convictions. If abortion is the murder of a human being, then there can be no clash of absolutes: A human life is worth infinitely more than any so-called “choice.” Borovoy’s article simply talks about how abortion works in the family and in the society."The history of abortion is closely entwined with platforms for social betterment-- producing a "planned family", a strong society, and powerful nation" In Japan, they approve of abortion for the fact that they want betterment for their society without overpopulating; government continues its massive efforts to reduce poverty. According to them a planned family is a bright family, a family that is good for social betterment. And abortion is one way of having a powerful nation or society. "For many women in such circumstances, abortion is deemed the "responsible" choice, despite the often powerful desire to have a child." Borovoy indicates here that to those women who don’t have any option, abortion is a “responsible” choice although some described abortion as sinful and wrong, many of those same women, and others, described the indiscriminate bearing of children as a sin, and their abortion as "the right thing" and "a responsible choice. The factors of aborting the child is neither the rights of a mother to abort a child nor the quality or condition of being an individual person but rather the social life of the child, if the child will be able to cope up, the welfare of the family, if the family will be able to provide the child good quality of living or will be able to sustain its need, and the state of being socially good in terms of raising the child, Financial problem is one of the factors that lead to abortion. Instead of bearing a child, they chose to abort the child because of the factors, and the social behavior of the mother. So is killing a child okay? To others, yes, because they don’t have the right to live according to the Pro-choice members. That is why some people are in side with the “Pro-choice” movement. The pro-choice movement argues that in cases where human personhood cannot be proven, e.g. in pregnancies prior to the point of viability, the government does not have the right to impede a woman's right to decide whether or not to continue a pregnancy; individuals have unlimited autonomy with respect to their own reproductive systems as long as they do not breach the autonomy of others. On the other hand, basing on the article, the people in side with the “Pro-life”.”The moral philosopher Judith Jarvis Thompson, have made the case that even if we grant the humanity of the fetus, a woman is still not ethically obliged to keep it. All these interventions are helpful. But what I am suggesting here is slightly different; it is a greater focus on the dignity and importance of parenthood.” According to Judith Jarvis Thompson, every fetus has the right to live. Every woman who bears a child has an obligation to fulfill. But it focuses more on the dignity of the mother and the right of a child to live. Parenthood is important if you have a family of your own that is why you should take care of it and not to waste it by aborting a child; aborting is not good in terms of religious act and in the society itself. "The humanization of the fetus in today's political environment feels threatening rather than considerate, as conservatives push to use ultrasound images to change the minds of women who seek to terminate their pregnancies." In today’s political environment, fetus’ humanization is somehow threatening in terms of getting the mother killed in some particular situation (literal), threatening in terms of rapid growth of population and the government’s massive effort to reduce it. Considerate in terms of aborting the child because she is raped, molested, etc. By the use of the ultrasound images, mothers will have a perception of changing its decision in aborting the child. Ultrasound images save lives and change hearts.

Does fetus have the right to live? Yes. Fetus are given a character in many context, they have a right to be humanized; they have right to live and yet abortion is morally accepted in the society.

           Abortion can somewhat be good or bad. The preborn child doesn’t have enough size, ability to feel pain, viability, self-awareness, etc. to be granted rights of personhood. Women should have the right to choose whether or not she should have an abortion. Abortion is one way to control the human population and also, abortion is a way to have a successful betterment in the society. There is a reason it's called Pro-Choice and not Pro-Abortion. It has been scientifically and medically proven that a fetus is not a human being, therefore abortion is not murder. Women have the right to choose what to do with their bodies and if they want an abortion, how does that affect anyone else but her and the father who helped create the fetus? On the other hand, during 1960, Planned Parenthood reported that 84% to 87% of all illegal abortions were performed by licensed physicians. In 1972, the year before Roe vs. Wade, 39 women died from illegal abortions. Each of those deaths was a tragedy, but every abortion is a tragedy, because it kills a living human being. And it can destroy the mother’s dignity and respect towards her child and herself. Borovoy kept bringing up that the mother knows what is best for the child so ultimately it is her choice, but how can a person possibly tell the future, no one will know the fate of the child until it is brought into this world. So which side are you on the “Pro-choice” or the “Pro-life”?

 Works Cited

Beyond Choice: A New Framework for Abortion?    Amy Borovoy ▪ Fall 2011·       

     http://caselaw.findlaw.com/us-supreme-court/410/113.html