#good job. gooood job.

[prismaticsaltedink]

What the fuck did his friend lace it with?! If Terry's friend laced his marijuana to make THAT happen that dude was not a friend and if Terry didn't take him out he could have killed a bunch of people with tainted schwag. Good job Terry, that's karma in action. Make sure you bury the body under a dead dog.

[inkykeiji]

new additions to the collection!!! (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

still in their plastic so mister wesley (pictured in the background) doesn’t get his white fur all over them until i find a good place to put them hehe <3

[gojosprettyprincess]

A/n please ignore any errors cause I wrote this at 3:30 am also this is the first writing I’ve done in like 3 months so i apologize if it’s not the best

Attempting to ride Satoru and trying to be the one in control of everything instead of him doing all the work, he’s laid back on the couch with his arms crossed behind his head as he watched his pretty girl bouncing up and down on his cock, it was soo fucking sexy to him seeing you like this, his eyes are fixated on your bouncing tits as his fat mushroom tip grazes against your g-stop everytime your tight cunt swallows his cock in when you sink yourself balls deep down onto his girth, Whimpering and moaning to his encouraging praises as your hands roam his abs and pecs.

"Fuckkk yes thats it princess, doing such a good job f'me, fuck this pretty little pussy on daddy’s cock just like that baby, Gooood girl"

You almost lost your mind to his praises, his fucking praises, they always had an affect on you and your cunt, your eyes roll to the back of your head like a little slut as you fucked your self faster onto his cock, he loved the way you were using his cock like some sextoy and fucking yourself dumb on his dick like some filthy pornstar whore, your were getting cockdrunk at this point, his tip bumping against all the right spots inside of you, the friction of his pubic hair tickling your clit made a creamy mess all around him as your gummy walls grips the life out of his cock, hugging him snugly and tight before you felt your legs cramping and your movements start getting slower and slower just as hes about to nut inside of you, he notices the change in movement and sighs in disappointment, murmuring “yeahh fuck it" under his breath, he let out a breathy groan before grabbing the fat of your ass with both hands and pounding himself up into your sloppy little cunt, your cream decorating all over his cock and balls from the extended amount of pleasure he was giving as you grabbed onto his biceps for dear life, your manicured nails digging into the hard flesh as his thick veins on his cock scatter against your walls, his cockhead rubbing against your cervix as his cum-filled balls kisses your asshole with every thrusts.

“M’sorry daddy” you whimpered

"It’s okay silly girl, ya really think you can do it all by yourself?, maybe you’ll get it next time Kay?” he chuckles before landing a hard slap on both of your ass cheeks thats def gonna leave his handprints for a few days but maybe thats what he intended.

"Ohh fuckk this pretty little cunt is tryna drain my fucking balls so badly, isnt she baby?", “she wants to be filled and stuffed with my seed Mm?”

"Gonna have to give her what she wants yeah?" he let out a small chuckle through a guttural moan before spurting ropes and ropes of sticky cum up into your messy cunt, stuffing you full with his babies as he pounds you through it while panting like a dog with sweat dripping dripping down his forehead, his dick pushes his cum deeper and deeper up inside of you as he attacks your neck, sucking and licking fresh marks on the tender flesh as your hole spasms around him.

[blindmagdalena]

All of a Sudden, There You Are

3k. homelander x gn!reader. pining. pure fluff! an older fic that desperately needed cleaning up. rewritten for a consistent perspective and added 600-some words. gif credit. AO3 link.

As Homelander's stylist, it's your job to ensure he looks his best, whether he's saving the world or saving face in front of the cameras. After nearly a year servicing him, things between you change abruptly.

Familiarity and consistency feed a base need in all of us. So much of what is best in us is bound up in the permanence of those around us that it becomes the measure of our stability. For Homelander, there are precious few things in his life that offer him any such quality of solidarity. People come and go. It's the nature of the business that has always been his life.

He's stopped paying attention to the PA's, interns and other worker ants that rotate in and out. Their faces blend together in a bland sea of normality and mediocrity. They're little more than cogs in the machine of his contrastingly extraordinary life.

Funny, then, that you should catch his attention amidst the insectoid buzz of it all.

It happens quite abruptly. He's just sat down before a brightly lit vanity where it's your job to style his hair and makeup, as it has been for the last several months. You greet him good morning, as you do every time, but for whatever reason... He notices you today.

"Remind me, what's your name again?" Homelander asks, watching you draw a comb from your kit.

That visibly catches you off guard. You offer only a dumbfounded stare for a moment before snapping to attention, smiling sheepishly as you introduce yourself. The name doesn't sound familiar to him. Had he never actually asked? Probably not. There’s rarely a point in bothering.

He hums contemplatively. "You've been styling me for a while.”

"Yes, sir. About eight months now," you say, using the comb to begin working product through his hair. He’s fairly certain this is the most he's ever spoken to you in all that time.

That sounds like both a long while and yet no time at all. It's nothing in the grand scheme of his life, but in terms of the people he sees consistently, that puts you in a shockingly small pool of individuals. Inevitably they move on, whether by choice or because they’ve found a way to irritate him enough that he has them dismissed.

He can recall his last stylist not by their name or face, but by the way they’d always manage to spray product in his eyes. They hadn’t lasted two days. The one before that he can’t bring to mind a single detail of.

Typically humans only become exceptional to him for how they grate on his patience. You’ve somehow managed to avoid making yourself noteworthy in that regard. Before today you had served as little more than a properly functioning gear in the well-oiled machine of his life.

Now it's as though you suddenly exist to him. Blood, flesh, laughter and all.

"Gooood morning," he greets you the next day, once again triggering another flare of surprise in you. He’s aware of the strangeness of his initiation, but behaves as though he isn’t. He flashes you one of his trademark Hollywood grins.

"Good morning to you, sir," you say with an answering smile that catches his eye. You sound pleased, which tickles something pleasant in the back of his own mind. He likes how well you’re mirroring his shift in mannerism.

He waves his hand dismissively. "Please, Homelander is fine. You keep it awfully formal."

You're actually quite pretty, he notices. Not exceptionally so, not like the celebrities and figures of social influence that someone like him brushes shoulders with on a daily basis, but... pretty nonetheless. He doesn't remember you being this pretty before, and speculates while you work whether you've changed something about yourself. He cannot put his finger on what exactly that may be, though.

He’s perceptive when it comes to the things that matter. Until yesterday, you hadn’t.

You laugh sweetly, pushing your fingers through his hair. His eyes flutter shut as you do. You’re good with your hands, much better than the last stylist. He’s sure he made note of that at some point, but in the same way someone notices when a door stops squeaking. You take it for granted after the first time.

"I'm a creature of habit. Might take me a couple tries to adjust," you warn, covering his forehead with your palm as you spritz product into his hair. You never let any of that sticky crap get on his face, much less in his eyes. You take measures to ensure his comfort, even though he’s never scolded you. You seem to do it entirely out of reflex simply because you care enough to.

"Well, you've made it this far. You've got time to adjust," he says. Now that he's seen you, he finds that he doesn't care for the thought of you being gone. More than that, he starts actively looking forward to the time he spends in the chair with you. What used to be a monotonous aspect of the celebrity side of his life becomes a comforting ritual. 

The two of you chat with surprising ease, like old friends made new. He tells you about himself, vents to you about work and personal business alike. In turn he learns about you and the life you live beyond the time you share with him. It’s nothing extraordinary–not like his–but it's yours, and for some reason, that’s enough to make it interesting.

The more he grasps that you are an entire person outside of the service you provide him, the more he wants to know. He doesn’t give a fuck about your elderly cat, but he does like the way your voice changes when you talk about it. His mind drifts when you tell him these little anecdotes, and he wonders what you tell the people in your life about him. He wonders if your tone similarly changes when you do. Do you speak fondly of him? Days turn to weeks. Little by little, Homelander discerns small changes in himself. There’s a slight pep in his step these days. The sun feels a little warmer, the thrum of crowded events less irritating. His attitude towards interviews flips; even the ones he used to dread he begins to anticipate. He knows you’ll have him looking and feeling his finest. He knows that regardless of what awaits him, you’ll have something to say about it that will make it easier to smile for the cameras.

Thinking of you is sometimes all it takes.

When he has nothing on his schedule to be styled for, he sulks. On those days, he misses your laugh the most. 

He makes sure the products he keeps at home are the same as the ones you use. The smell of them reminds him of the smell of you, of your knock-off Dior perfume that fades too quickly after you apply it, which makes it just perfect for his keen sense of smell. The humble subtlety of you, your sincerity and gentleness, have become a boon against the unfeeling corporate reality of his life. On the days he does see you, he begins to miss you before he’s even left you. Now, as he walks to his next scheduled appointment with you, he’s painfully aware of the beat of his own heart. His stomach is twisting in on itself, though he isn’t hungry. If anything, he feels a little nauseous. The closer he gets to the door, the louder the cacophony inside of him becomes. Is he sick? That shouldn’t be possible, but he can’t understand what’s happening to him. Pausing just outside the door, he takes in a steadying breath.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Taking a moment to collect himself, he gives his face two quick pats on either side, shaking his head. Get it together, he tells himself, stepping into the dressing room. 

“Gooood morn–” Homelander cuts himself short, looking around the empty room. His brows pinch. He isn’t early. Pursing his lips, he takes a brief stroll about the room, clutching his hands behind his back. He peers down the hallway, cutting through the layers of wall with his vision. No sign of you on the grounds yet. He clicks his tongue. 

You’ve never been late. Unable to settle, he paces for a while. He has the thought to call you, but he realizes he doesn’t have your number. Why doesn’t he have your number? It seems such an obvious thing to have despite the fact he’s never needed it.

He’s just pulled out his cellphone to track it down from Ashley when the door suddenly opens and his head snaps up. The initial relief he feels is cut short, turning cold in his chest when the person who steps through the door is most definitely not you. “Good morning!” the woman greets him, her voice chirpy and grating in his ears. She’s not really happy to see him. She doesn’t know the first fucking thing about him. At most, she’s another sycophantic drone who’s only pleased to breathe his air. In his upset, she looks freakishly distorted, her smile overly wide and fake. His leather gloves creak as he curls his hands into fists. “Who the fuck are you?” he asks, voice as measured as he can manage it. His anger hits in an unreasonable surge, hot like lava from a volcano. This woman’s only crime is the fact she’s not you, and yet it’s enough to make him want to rip her head off her shoulders, spine and all. The woman hesitates in the doorway, her chipper demeanor flipping to a fearful one. “Uhm, my name is Lisa, I’m supposed to style you to–” “Where is my stylist?” he interrupts her, prowling towards her like a hungry predator. He says again, louder this time, voice full of anger and anxiety in equal measure, “Where the fuck is my stylist?!” “I– I don’t know!” Lisa yelps, stepping backwards from him. “I was called in as a last minute replacement! They said– they said there was an accident, or–” Homelander pushes her roughly out of the doorway, blowing past her with a frustrated growl. She hits the wall hard before crumpling to the floor like a lifeless sack of potatoes, but he doesn’t even register it. He calls Ashley, stalking down the hallway, his footfalls loud with fury. Why the fuck didn’t anyone think to tell him? “Ashley!” He snarls into his phone the second she answers. “Tell me where the fuck my goddamn stylist is.”

Homelander is at the hospital within minutes. The staff puts up a meager effort to enforce protocols, but he’s The Homelander, and after a lie or two, they eventually let him through. He hates the smell of hospitals. The sickly mix of bleach and illness, the buzzing of the fluorescent lights. They never should have brought you here. You should be in Vought’s med ward.

You should be with him. When he finds you, you’re sitting with the hospital bed halfway reclined, wearing nothing but a hospital gown. The vibrant reds and blues of his suit paint a sharp contrast to the stark white walls of the hospital room when he steps inside. You have a pudding cup in your hand, though you nearly drop it when you see him in the doorway. His hair is woefully unstyled, splayed loose in every direction from his flight. “H-Homelander,” you sputter, choking on your bite of pudding. You swallow, clearing your throat. He’s walking towards you. The closer he gets, the faster your heart beats in his ears. “What are you doing here?” “Are you okay?” He asks, blowing off your question entirely. He blinks and his vision flickers through your clothes and skin alike. He scans your body for internal damage, for broken or fractured bones. You’re not wearing a cast or anything, but he needs to be sure. You nod, clutching at the blanket, wearing your confusion plainly on your face. “Yeah, I’m okay, it’s probably just mild whiplash, but I’m getting an x-ray to be–” “You’re fine,” he breathes more to himself than to you, his relief palpable. He can hear the flustered patter of your heart clearly. With the adrenaline wearing off, he’s beginning to feel that sickly familiar feeling that he had experienced in the hallway; butterflies rampant in his stomach, battering their wings frantically inside him. His jaw feels tight, his tongue too big for his mouth. Staring at you now, frail and precious as you are in this ugly hospital bed, he realizes what’s the matter–what has always been the matter–he is deeply and incurably in love with you. “Are you okay?” You ask, taking in his tortured expression, his wildly wind-swept hair. The obvious concern in your voice and in your eyes churns his already twisting gut. “No,” he says, the response knee-jerk. Even though the room is still, he feels as though the world is spinning around him. “No, I think I’m in love with you,” he says, expression twisted up, like he’s figuring out each word as he says them. Your heart skips a beat, your breath catches in your lungs. It’s as if the words have paralyzed you. Homelander laughs. It sounds a little hysterical. 

“I’m telling you all of a sudden, but it isn’t new with me,” he says, reaching out to cup either side of your face in his gloved hands. “I love you,” he says, voice firmer now, the realization setting in fully. He looks slightly delirious with it. He’s discovered a secret that he should have known all along, that seems so obvious in hindsight. Of course he loves you, because you love him. The gentleness in your hands as you touched his face, the care in your fingers stroking through his hair far longer than both of you knew you needed to. You dedicated yourself like no other to showing him reverence in service of him, and is that not love in its purest form? And yet, you don’t look to share his elation. You look like you’ve been struck by lightning, expression wide and bewildered. You still haven’t taken a breath. Homelander’s smile falters. “What’s the matter?” He asks, tone dropping a touch. “This is good news! Great, even.” For every second that you do not speak, the beat of his heart feels heavier in his chest. Why don’t you look happy? Finally, you suck in a shaky breath. He watches you with all the intensity of a viper poised to strike.

“I…” You hesitate. You lift your hands and grip his wrists, squeezing them through the thick fabric of his gloves as if to convince yourself that he’s really there. Maybe the accident was worse than he thought. Did you hit your head? 

Panic swells in his chest. It hadn’t occurred to him you might not reciprocate. The thought makes him ill.

“I never…” your eyes turn glassy, welling with tears. “Say it!” he wants to shout, his own heart hammering loudly enough to nearly drown out your words.  “I never would have thought–or even dreamed–in a million years that you might love me back.”

love me back.

Like a dying ember roaring back to life, Homelander’s demeanor reignites, his faded smile broadening once more. 

“I realized it when I was worried fucking sick because you didn't show up,” he says, leaning closer to you. He’s brought the scent of ozone from the sky he tore through on his way to you, but all he cares about is the faint smell of pudding lingering on your lips.

He huffs a laugh. “They sent in some idiot to fill in for you. Like they could replace you. I almost tore her head off,” he says, giddy with euphoria. Your expression shifts, brows furrowing. “Wait, what? You almost-” “I’m gonna kiss you now,” he interrupts, his voice a low rumble. He can already taste you in the breaths you’re close enough to share with him, and he’s never been hungrier for anything–or anyone–in his life. You fall silent with a shiver, nodding minutely, eyes falling shut. “Please do.” His lips meet yours in a gentle press. He deserves a medal for not crushing you with the sheer magnitude of his desire. You all but melt against him, settling into his grip as smoothly as you settled into his life, his mind, his heart. When the two of you break apart, you make a breathless noise that shoots through him like a bolt of lightning. He feels hyper aware of your every sound and move.

God, how he wants to feel every part of you. 

You move your hands to touch his face and he leans into the softness of your caress. You’ve been close enough to kiss more times than he can count. The fact it’s only now occurred to him to do so seems like lunacy. Your eyes dip to his lips, your thumb brushes the bottom one. He catches it with a quick kiss and you laugh your sweet bell-chime laughter.

Pushing your hand into his hair, the wondrous joy in your expression becomes tinged with amusement. “And people wonder why I use so much gel,” you murmur, smooth the wild splay of his hair down with both hands, cupping the back of his head. Homelander smiles wide and boyishly, which prompts you to kiss him again.

“I’m not having some kind of brain bleed hallucination right now, right?” You ask quietly, the tip of your nose lightly pressed to his. He brushes his lips against yours between words. “You’re serious?”

“As a heart attack,” he purrs, stroking your cheek with his thumb. Despite the ugly fluorescent lights and the dreadful hospital stench all around, you look resplendent in your joy.

He had been right. It was love that you touched him with. It had been subtle, imbued in your every movement, and for months he had soaked it up until, unbeknownst to him, he fell into it as well.

“Trust me when I say you’ll be seeing a lot more of me from now on,” he says, brushing your nose with his.

Maybe instead of tearing them limb from limb, he’ll send flowers to whoever the sorry son of a bitch that rear-ended you this morning was. Who knows how much more time he would have wasted before he realized he was utterly smitten with you.

[bloodyarson]

not to derail but i think the reason why american english is so easy to learn and to speak for a lot of people is exactly because correct enunciation doesn't matter one bit really. as long as you make a noise that has the right vowels and kinda similar consonants people will understand what you're saying 90% of the time. and so i think, other than imperialism of course, this is one of the reasons why english is everyone in the world's "common tongue" now. even with a really thick accent english is still understandable, way more than most other majorly spoken languages. i mean, just fucking take a listen to french! or don't actually unless you want your ears to start bleeding.

so yeah in conclusion i think the reason why english is the language everyone learns and communicates in is because of this specific lack of a need to properly pronounce things, making it so much easier than most other languages for non native speakers. :)

americans be like i’m looking at myself in the meer

[charliemwrites]

Mafia!au part 5!

A bit of fluff, a bit of drama, a bit of Soap!

Content: Attempted Gaslighting, Violence

“Gooood morning, sir!” you sing as you sweep into Mr. Price’s office. “And happy birthday!”

His head shoots up from whatever he was brooding over, brows arched high in genuine shock. Surprise is a good look on him.

“How the bloody hell did you know it’s my birthday?” he demands, sitting back in his chair.

You beam, sauntering right up to his desk. His eyes flick to the round white box balanced on top of your tablet. Nothing big, a little something you baked at home after a couple dissatisfying trials.

“It’s my job to know,” you reply easily.

He blinks– a habit you flatter yourself thinking he might have picked up from you. “What else do you know about me?”

You tilt your head at him, a smug curve to your lips.

“Just the basics. Your full name and birthday,” you demure. Hold up your free hand and start rattling off on your fingers. “Height, allergies, tea preference, pastry preference, blood type, drink of choice…”

You set the box in front of him and resettle your tablet in the crook of your arm. He stares at you for a beat, expression bleached from surprise to outright shock. You spin your stylus around your fingers.

“Which is why I made you a marble cake with whiskey instead of rum.”

His eyes lock onto the unassuming white box. It’s not a big cake by any means, about six inches in diameter and only one layer. Just a small something for Price to have for himself. God knows the rest of the boys (and Farah) get enough treats from you as it is.

“You made this?” he asks, leaning a bit forward.

“Yessir,” you declare, “and I’m pretty good at it too. Perks of stress baking.”

He runs a hand down his face, as if his beard got ruffled. “Christ, you need a raise.”

“Yes. Anyway – I’ll get you a plate after I’m done,” you say, swatting at his curious hand. He huffs but sits back to give you his full attention. You smile in reward and begin reciting his schedule for the day.

He listens, only interrupting when he needs clarification on little details. You try not to be too endeared by the way his eyes occasionally flick to the covered cake. When you finish, you twitch your nose at him knowingly.

“I’ll get you a plate before I get started on that expense summary,” you say, turning on your heel.

You hum in surprise when a large, calloused hand catches your wrist. It’s not the hand of a businessman, you think, but a man used to work. A man who does the hard things for himself. Before meeting John Price, you would have scoffed at the thought of a rich man knowing labor. Price though… well, he’s been proving to be a welcome exception since the very start.

“Thank you for this, love,” he says, voice hitting that tone and pitch that makes your insides squirm. He caresses his thumb over the tender skin before releasing you. “Really.”

You can already feel the blush climbing up the back of your neck, over your ears, creeping onto your cheeks. Can’t ever catch a break with him.

“Well, don’t thank me ‘til you’ve tried it,” you try to deflect.

“Weren’t you the one saying you’re decent at baking.”

“Yeah, well… maybe I poisoned you or something – for that time you closed my skirt in the door.”

He sputters a bit. You bite the inside of your cheek to keep from giggling at the indignance on his face. Such a handsome, almost regal man. You love to rile him up.

“I apologized. Profusely.”

And offered to buy you a new skirt entirely. The way you’d shrieked that that was not an appropriate response made Soap choke with laughter as people stared.

“Yeah, well, I hold a grudge,” you reply, shrugging.

It’s true, but not about things like that. Graves and his assistant? Oh, that’s practically a blood feud at this point. A silly little accident where your boss left a crease in your fourth favorite skirt? That’s not even something to forgive him for, but you sure as hell will never forget. Especially when he still seems mildly sheepish about it.

“You wouldn’t be the first,” he grumbles. You’re not sure if he’s talking about grudges or poisoning, but the dramatics finally make you laugh.

“But I could be the last,” you call over your shoulder as you flounce out.

Not for long though, returning with a disposable fork from the breakroom. There’s something amusing to only you about a man in a thousand-pound suit using cheap plastic.

“Come to see me keel over for yourself, then?” he asks.

“Well, I can’t have you getting cake crumbs on the expense reports,” you reason.

He’s already got the lid open. No icing on the cake – you’re shit at decorating, so you chose a recipe without icing. The flavor of the whiskey and sugar should be plenty. To make up for it, you folded a tiny placard and wrote “Happy Birthday, Boss!” in your best loopy cursive.

He takes the fork, fingers brushing yours in the process. You remind yourself not to snatch your hand away like a scandalized Victorian lady. Christ, you really need to get it together.

“Tell me how you like it,” you say, making to leave again.

“Come try it yourself,” he protests.

You pause, give him an amused look. “I didn’t actually poison it, sir. You’ve not done anything that heinous. Yet.”

He snorts, carefully digging out a respectable bite from the edge. “If you see fit to toss a little rat poison in, then I’ll likely having it coming.”

You hum. “Arsenic is more my style. Classic.”

In the corner of the room, Simon makes a little noise you’ve come to recognize as repressed laughter. You shoot him a quick, amused look, before shifting your attention back as Price gestures with the fork.

“Regardless, you should get a little taste of the fruits of your labor,” he offers.

The fruits of your labor, you think with a bit of regret, will be his enjoyment of your baking. You’re not sure when his admiration became your favorite part of the day, but you’re spoiled for positive feedback from your otherwise stern boss.

“You first,” you insist, “it’s your birthday after all.”

He keeps unnerving eye contact as he brings the bite to his mouth, tongue flicking out to catch any spare crumbs. He hums, eyes closing a for a second in enjoyment, before opening and fixating on you again.

“That’s bloody brilliant, love.”

He scoops up another piece, brings it right to your mouth. You hurry to put a hand beneath in case it falls; don’t even think before parting your lips. Sugar and whiskey, chocolate and vanilla, burst across your tongue.

“Oh!” you hum, hiding your mouth while you chew. “That is pretty good.”

It only occurs to you as he takes another bite for himself, a twinkle in his eye, that you just ate after him. Used the same fork like it was nothing, like that’s an acceptable thing to do as his assistant. You’re not squeamish by any means, no. It’s just… it’s gotta be crossing some sort of professional line. You can’t imagine any of your previous bosses ever sharing with you like this.

“Let me tell you, if you did poison it,” he muses, “I wouldn’t mind it being the last thing I ate.”

You roll your eyes, swat lightly at his arm again. “I told you; it’s not poisoned.”

“I know, you just took a bite,” he answers smugly.

You click your tongue at him, playing at exasperated. “I’m going to work now.”

“Ta, love.”

--

“Oi, li’l miss?”

You glance up at Soap curiously.

(Recognize, in the back of your mind, that it’s a nickname that’s not only spread – thanks, Simon – but that you’re responding to as quickly as your own name now. You should probably feel some type of way about that. Probably righteously annoyed or something. You don’t.)

Soap is standing at your desk, shifting from foot to foot. Uneasy. But the expression on his usually friendly face isn’t nervous. It’s… something else. Something you don’t know how to decipher but makes you sit up a bit straighter, alert.

“What’s up, buttercup?” you ask, voice light.

“There’s some bloke down in the lobby, says he’s got a date with you?” he explains, frowning deeper than you’ve ever seen.

It gets deeper – and angrier – when he sees the blood drain from your face. You push your chair away from your desk to hide the tremble that’s trying to infest your hands.

Absolutely not. This is your place of work, dammit. Where you’re calm and collected, the person anyone can turn to for solutions. You’ve worked so hard to craft this sleek vessel of professional grace and you’re not about to have it sullied like this.

“He does not have a date with me,” you state, keeping your voice flat and tight. “Would you come down with me, please?”

“’Course,” he replies instantly.

You stop by Price’s office, knock twice, then poke your head in when he calls for entry.

“I’ve just got to pop out for a mo’,” you explain, “I’ll be right back!”

He nods and you duck out again before he can notice anything amiss. For a rich bastard, he’s too observant of others. (Especially you.)

“What’s he here fer, then?” Soap asks in the elevator.

You let out an annoyed puff of air. “A reality check, I assume.”

He side-eyes you but doesn’t ask any further before the doors open.

Sure enough, standing in the lobby, is the last man you want to see. Your ex, Brandon.

“There you are, bunny. You’ve been keeping me waiting for—”

“One, do not call me that. It’s inappropriate,” you interrupt, crisp and sharp. “Two, I haven’t been keeping you waiting, because there’s nothing to wait for. Three, get out.”

He rolls his eyes, that smarmy curve to his lips never leaving. You don’t think he’s even noticed Soap just behind you yet.

“Look, I know you’re still in a mood about everything,” he says, “but that’s why I’m taking you out. To smooth things over. Clear the air, and all that.”

“You’re not taking me out,” you repeat. “Get out.”

He crosses his arms, tilting his head in that condescending way you’ve always despised. It sets your teeth on edge, makes you burn with anger.

“This isn’t your building,” he goads, “you can’t kick me out.”

“Might as well be hers, mate,” Soap interjects, “she could kick out the goddamn queen.”

Brandon’s focus shifts to him. You feel a curl of vindictive satisfaction when his expression curdles a bit. Soap may not be a particularly tall man, but he can be intimidating. Built thick and strong, doesn’t bother to conceal his physique at all with his sleeves rolled up his forearms. And you’re not oblivious to his looks either. Soap is a handsome man. A walking ego bruise for a man like your ex.

“Fine,” he huffs, “then come outside so we can talk like adults.”

You click your tongue, fold your hands behind your back to conceal the way your fingers clench into fists. “We did talk like adults. You just failed to listen like one.”

And ohhhh, the petty satisfaction that bubbles through you at the way his teeth click in shock, a flush of embarrassed anger curtaining his face.

“Now, I’ll ask one more time and then my coworker is going to toss you out himself.” Soap chooses that moment to crack his knuckles. “Leave this building. You’re not welcome.”

You drop your arms and turn on your heel, ready to get back to work and compartmentalize this until you’ve got a fuck-off sized glass of wine in front of you.

“Hey, we’re not—”

Even if you did see what happened, you don’t think you could have followed. It happens so fast. One second, Soap’s eyes are on you. Burning with questions and fury on your behalf, checking that you’re okay. The next, he’s darted past you. There’s a scuffle, fancy shoes squeaking on polished floors, a thick, wet pop. Then Brandon is shouting in pain.

You jump, twist to see what the commotion is. Soap’s got a white-knuckled grip on Brandon’s extended wrist – though now it’s bent at an awful angle, you realize he must have been reaching for you. Your skin crawls.

“Away ‘n bile yer heid,” Soap growls, shoving Brandon back roughly.

He doesn’t fall on his ass but it’s a near thing. With the eyes of reception, a few employees, and you on him, he spits a curse at Soap and retreats. You stare after for a moment, lips parted in shock.

“All set, miss?” Soap asks, adjusting his sleeves.

“Um, yeah,” you say. Blink and pull yourself together. “I mean, yes. Let’s head back up before the boss misses us.”

He places a hand on the small of your back on the short walk back. It feels grounding rather than proprietary; you’re grateful for it. He lasts until the doors close before turning to you.

“The hell was that about, lass?”

You sigh, smooth your skirt down for lack of anything else to do. “That was my ex. He wants to… reconcile, I suppose. And he’s quite keen on getting his way.”

Soap mutters a few choice words under his breath. Scottish slang, you suspect. You’ll have to get him to teach you sometime.

“Anyway, thank you for your help,” you continue, eyes on the elevator doors. “I can’t believe he showed up here. I’m so embarrassed.”

“You’ve nothin’ to be embarrassed about, hen,” he protests. “He’s the creeper here.”

You sigh. “I know, I just… you don’t think less of me, do you? That I didn’t… take care of him myself.”

Soap’s expression softens. He draws you into a quick one-armed hug. “You did take care of ‘im, far as I’m concerned. I was just there to enforce. No need to mess up yer pretty nails, aye?”

You smile, small but genuine. “Thanks, again.”

“Anytime, li’l miss.”

The elevator chimes as it reaches the top floor. You turn to Soap just before the doors open.

“Oh, and please don’t tell the boss.”

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Masterlist

[leclerc-hs]

capsize - cl16

pairing: charles leclerc x nanny!reader summary: in which charles is an idiot and you decide to make him suffer for a little bit warnings: smut, angst!, exhibitionism (kinda?), breeding kink!, language, 18+!, bad french!!! (please correct me and i'll edit), barely proofread (sorry if there’s mistakes my eyeballs hurt) word count: 5.9k (LENGTHYYYYY) author's note: had to give us some angst obvi....but also smut bc single dad charles is so hot. let me know what you think! I can't believe it ended up being this long but it felt like it was impossible to end. xoxo. please blow this up bc the effort I put into writing this took 100% of my brain power away lmao. also I got an anon request to write about nanny getting a internship with a fashion company which is included in this! french edits made by the lovely @dannyramirezwife (idk what I would do without you)

part 1 part 2

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

yourusername

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 52,789 others yourusername welcome to miami 🐚🧡 view all 1,321 comments yourbsf but how do you kill it every time??? landonorris mmmm papaya looks good on you🍊 charles_leclerc how do I dislike a comment? liked by yourusername and 7,829 others yourusername 😂 user guys omg. user charles is NOT having it charles_leclerc beautiful. but please stick to red ❤️ user CRYING user lando is def on his shit list user lando wants her so bad lmaoooo

yourusername

liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and 78,992 others yourusername luigi follows only the ferraris 🏎️🏁 view all 4,391 comments scuderiaferrari as you should! ❤️ user OMG SHES IN MIAMI!!!! user does this mean his daughter is there!!!! user i would hope. unless she's not doing her job lol user we need baby leclerc content!!! charles_leclerc damn right ❤️ yourbsf miami looks gooood on u. wanna move? yourusername 😏 charles_leclerc absolutely not user charles gtfooooo user what does charles just stalk her comments?

charles_leclerc

liked by scuderiaferrari, yourusername, arthur_leclerc, and 1,582,817 others charles_leclerc special guests this weekend ❤️ we’ll keep pushing as always. view all 5,717 comments scuderiaferrari the most precious guests EVER user literally. user guys he’s using plurals again!!! user it has to be about @/yourusername too user crying they’re so cute carlossainz55 can’t wait for her to design my next helmet 🌶️ charles_leclerc OUR* yourusername sweet baby girllllll 🩷🧸🎀

lando.jpg

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and 274,892 others lando.jpg mrs. 305 tagged yourusername view all 3,672 comments user omg. user are her and lando dating? user i hope not user they would be so cute carlossainz55 damnnnnn 🌶️🥵 lando.jpg don't poke the bear @/charles_leclerc charles_leclerc 😒 yourusername don’t ever let me take another tequila shot again lando.jpg should i cancel the ones i just ordered to your room? yourusername you BETTER be joking charles_leclerc is that why i opened the door to shots? charles_leclerc mon dieu user no like she's so pretty user they're sharing a room!??? landonorris tagged yourusername in a story!

seen by charles_leclerc, yourbsf, carlossainz55, and 900,281 others yourusername

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, maxfewtrell, and 65,428 others yourusername who let lando behind the dj booth last night???? tagged landonorris view all 2,318 comments maxfewtrell he’s such a 🐍 user omg her and lando?? user lando has been in love with her for so long user can we just take in that charles didn’t like this post? user charles has a habit of not liking any of her posts with other men 👀 user ariana what are u doing here user where is charles?? user prob with his daughter bc she clearly isn't lol user it's HIS daughter landonorris i'm so lucky user WHAT!!!!!!! user GUYS HELP user IS HE CONFIRMING?!!!? yourusername you need to stop trolling the internet lando user DJ LANDOOOOO HAS RETURNED

YOU BEGIN TO wonder whether the universe harbors some inexplicable grudge against you. Because really, you always make sure to check in on your friends often. You always make sure to pay your bills on time, if not earlier. Heck, you even make sure to donate to a different charity every month. Yet, as the jet encounters heavily turbulent skies on the way to Miami, the persistent question echoes in your mind ‘why me?’.

Luckily, a bundle of joy rests on your lap, cupping your face in her hands, and playfully squeezing your cheeks. A sweet distraction from the terror you feel inside. It’s adorable how earnestly she tries to impact calmness in you, even though her eyes are half shut with sleep. 

“Ne sois pas effrayé,” Don’t be scared. Her voice maintains its gentleness as she swiftly loses interest in your cheeks, redirecting her tiny hands to play with the ends of your hair. “Je suis là avec papa.” Me and papa are here.

“Chérie,” Charles coos at his daughter, picking her up from your lap and resting her down on the bed. “Repose-toi bien," Get some rest. He tucks her into the bed, a space far too vast for her tiny body, nestling her favorite fluffy bunny stuffed animal by her side. You observe in admiration as he plants a gentle kiss to her forehead, then tenderly strokes her hair in a soothing manner.

“J’ai besoin qu’elle me borde, papa,” I need her to tuck me in. Her tiny fingers point to you and your heart instantly tightens. With a slight shake in your steps, you make your way to the bed, sitting on the side of it. “Bonne nuit, ma petite.” Goodnight, little one.

“Bonne nuit, maman,” Goodnight, mom. The words were mumbled with sleep, but it was the name that couldn’t be ignored.

For a brief period, both you and Charles experienced a suspended moment, a pause in time. Never had she referred to you in such a way, and you certainly didn’t want Charles to assume you influenced her perception in any manner.

“I don’t know why she said that.”

Caught like a deer in headlights, you pivot your head to face him. Panic courses through you, eyes widened, heart pounding. Yet, as you turn to Charles, he appears nonchalant, offering only a casual shrug of his shoulders.

“C’est bien.” It’s okay.

In a hushed pause, the both of you remain motionless aside from turning your head back to the sleeping toddler, entranced by how peaceful she looks. However, Charles finds it hard to divert his gaze from you. His eyes focus on the serene scene of his daughter’s fingers delicately entwined with yours, even in the depths of sleep, acknowledging the profound connection between you two. In these tranquil moments, where your presence is indispensable for tucking her in, Charles not only appreciates the nurturing care you offer but also recognizes the profound love and solace you impact. He can’t help but feel incredibly fortunate to have you in his life.

Only when Charles’s gentle hands tenderly squeezed the back of your neck, providing a subtle massage to your tense muscles, did you become acutely aware of the extent of your own exhaustion.

“Allez, dormons un peu, d’accord?” Let’s get some sleep, yeah? His lips delicately brushed against the shell of your ear, followed by a tender kiss on your temple, guiding you toward the other bed on the jet. Wrapping his arms snugly around your body, he let the both of you fall onto the mattress. While pulling the covers over both of you, your face pressed against his chest clad in a soft t-shirt. As you planted a gentle kiss above the neckline, you could feel the rapid rhythm of his heartbeat.  

Despite the passing of a few months since that initial kiss, your connection with Charles retained a serene simplicity. In the quietude of your shared moments, you found solace. Deliberately, you resisted the temptation to let your mind drift into the what if’s, choosing instead to remain in the present moments. 

However, within his mind, thoughts raced at a million miles a minute. Regardless of the casualness of your relationship you both claim to have, he couldn’t stop picturing you with swollen breasts and a swollen belly. The moment his daughter called you ‘maman’, an almost feral instinct surged within him. It was a wild and untamable force. He couldn���t stop imagining you pregnant. Full of his kid. Full of him. The need to fill you up with all of him was all but surging through his veins. All the blood was rushing to his cock, and he knew he needed to get these thoughts out of his head. 

“Bonne nuit,” Goodnight. His voice sounded so rough as his arms tightened around you and you easily fell into a quick slumber, feeling so safe in his arms from the turbulent skies.

-

The abrupt touchdown of the jet resonated through the cabin, rousing you from slumber. A ballet of movement ensued before your eyes met the scene: Charles had migrated to one of the plush seats, his daughter perched upon his knee. The ambient hum of the aircraft formed a backdrop to the unfolding familial vignette, a delicate interplay of affection. As Charles tenderly pinched his daughter’s cheeks, childlike laughter following their hushed whispers.

Charles shifted his gaze towards you, now upright on the bed. Your tousled hair framed a face adorned with the lingering softness of sleep, and your eyes, slightly puffy with remnant of slumber, held a captivating allure. Despite your disheveled state, he couldn’t help but find that you remained the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“Bien dormi?” Sleep well?

A gentle smile played on your lips as you rose from the bed, indulging in a languorous stretch that showcased the contours of your body. The fabric of the t-shirt clung momentarily, revealing the subtle canvas of freckles adorning your stomach to Charles. His gaze involuntarily flicked away, a reflex triggered by the flooding memories, thoughts of you pregnant resurfacing in vivid detail. The mere glimpse of your stomach had him internally spiraling. 

“Uncle Lorenzo and Auntie Char want to see you bébé,” baby. A ripple of excitement danced in his daughter’s eyes as she clapped her hands joyfully at the mere mention of her uncle. Lorenzo and Charlotte had made their way to Miami a few days prior, cleverly disguising their visit as an opportunity to vacation while supporting Charles in the impending race. This strategic maneuver afforded you and Charles the luxury of solitude in the days leading up to the event, a rare and treasured gift compared to the last few months.

-

“Merde,” Shit. He grunted as his head fell back against the headboard of the shared bed. His green eyes watching you with flushed cheeks as you worked yourself over his cock. “This is where you belong, yeah?” 

The morning sun peeked through the curtains of the hotel room. Eliciting a warm glow in the hotel room as you sunk down onto him deeper than before. Your pussy fluttering around his length, appeasing the ache that he created before you even opened your eyes. 

You nodded your head repeatedly. “Mon dieu, yes.” 

His hands cup your ass, fingers pressing firmly into the delicate layers of your skin, leaving an imprint as if searching for a connection beneath the surface. Controlling your movements, he urges you to move more frantically. The feeling of your hot, wet, pussy squeezing him was almost too much for him to handle.

With each passing second, the pressure of his fingers increased, creating a sensation of both command and invitation at the back of your neck. His touch was a deliberate grasp, not just holding but asserting dominance. Your lips met in a symphony of desire.  His tongue slipping into your mouth instantly, brushing against yours as he held you against him. Your nipples flushed against the toned muscles of his chest as you leaned in, and the pound of his hips fucking upwards into you, had you all but mewling into his mouth. 

“C’mon mon ange, don’t make me wait.” My angel.

You’re not sure if it was the pet name or the fact that you loved to please him. Or maybe the brush of his body against your clit. But your orgasm came quickly after while the tears spilled slowly from your eyes. He swallowed every moan you gave him like it was his own source of oxygen before flipping both of you over and pushing you face first into the mattress.

Every moan you gave him was like fuel to the pound of his hips. He was completely lost in the feeling of you. “Take it all,” he grunted as he pushed your body into the mattress deeper than before, his eyes not moving from the sight of his cock coated with you and slipping into you. 

You were begging and pleading him to give you more, more, more. You don’t know what more he could give you; you just knew you needed it.

“So pretty like this,” he muttered, “like you were made just to take my fucking cock whenever I need.” His thrusts began to slow, but the speed didn’t alter just how good they felt. No, he pushed himself even further, hitting all the spots just right. It was as if he was trying to become one with you. Like he wanted merge you two into a singular existence. 

“Cha,” You moaned out his name and you couldn’t see but his eyes widened. His heart clenched at the nickname. He pulled out quickly, provoking a complaint from your lips as he began scooping one of his arms under your stomach and flipping you onto your back. He took a second to just look at you, a shine forming in his eyes as he observed you. You look absolutely fucked. Cheeks flushed, hair all over the place, eyes glossed with satiation, and red marks all over your neck from his fingertips.

“Needed to see your face,” he answered before you could ask, slipping his cock back into your needy hole. The confession making your heart clench and the stretch of his cock had your stomach doing flips. “Besoin de voir tes yeux.” Needed to see your eyes.

His gaze was unwavering and fixed upon you. It was as if sought to etch the intricate details of your face into the canvas of his memory. He wanted to capture every nuance, every curve, and every expression that you made. 

“Merde, let me cum in you.” His eyes trailed down your face, to your neck, to your breasts. The bounce of your breasts from the force of his hips had him in a trance, thoughts of you with swollen breasts came back to mind. When he felt your pussy clench around him at the phrase, a smirk formed. “Yeah? Want me to fill you up sweet girl?

“S’il ti plaît,” please. You were pleading. You wanted nothing more. “J’en ai besoin.” I need it.

Charles’s eyes almost rolled to the back of his head at your confession. His groaning and grunting increasing in volume as he pounds into you harder, every inch of his cock pressing against your velvet walls as he releases into you, making you feel all warm inside. 

“Tu es parfaite.” You’re perfect. He collapses beside you; his voice was so low that you almost didn’t hear him mumble the words as he pressed his lips to your collarbone before resting his head on the pillows. You felt your cheeks redden almost instantly, brushing off the compliment with a smile and small laugh. 

“Je dois prendre une douche.” I need to shower. The mixture of his and yours cum was oozing down your leg. You could still feel the warmth of it. Charles mumbled a soft “mmmm”, already drifting off into a slumber. 

-

You weren’t sure what changed in the few minutes you were in the bathroom, but you could feel the unease build in your stomach as you emerged with a towel wrapped around your frame and skin flushed red from the heat of the water to Charles pacing around the room, a knuckle in between his teeth.

He was agitated to say the least. He felt betrayed by you.

A subtle smile played on Charles’s lips as the sound of the shower resonated in the room, accompanied by your soft hum of a song he couldn’t name. The ambiance of the hotel room cocooned him in a profound sense of peace, and in that moment, he wished he could stay here eternally with you. Kissing you, touching you, inside of you.

When he heard the buzzing of a phone on the table beside the bed, he instinctively reached for it without glancing at the screen, presuming it to be his own. Given the context of it being a race weekend, early morning phone calls were expected. 

“Bonjour?” Hello? He let out a cough, clearing his throat from the sound of sleep and satiated desire. The subtle rasp carried with it the traces of his happiness.

“Ah bonjour, hello, this is Camille with Christian Dior.” The woman’s voice echoes into Charles’ ear. He sits up immediately, back against the headboard. His first thought was ‘why is Christian Dior calling me?’ but it wasn’t that abnormal either. Companies reached out to him all the time for collaborations. “I am calling regarding the application we received for the internship and wanted to schedule and in-person meeting.”

Charles felt his stomach twist in knots as he listened to Camille chatter into the phone. Application? Internship? Moving the phone from his ear, he looked at the phone realizing that it was in fact yours and not his. This call was for you, not him. Camille’s voice was muffled as it was pulled away from his ear. 

A wave of nausea coursed through Charles, the unexpected revelation at the possibility of you leaving hitting him hard. How could you just apply for another job like that? He felt himself growing antsy and restless as thoughts swirled in his head. Camille, who was confused by the silence, mumbled something about calling back later due to the lack of response from Charles.

He dropped the phone onto the duvet of the bed, standing up and pacing the room while he felt himself begin to question everything. Questioning why you would leave. Does he not give you enough? Was it too much to handle? As his thoughts droned on, taking a turn for the worse, he began to feel angry. Angry that you considered leaving this job. He began to see red.

“Qu’est-ce qui ne va pas?” What’s wrong? You were cautious, not standing too close to him to give him some space. His head whipped in your direction almost too quickly. 

Your attention was drawn to the wrinkle lines etched on Charles’s forehead, marking the aftermath of his furrowed eyebrows. The subtle creases and wrinkles, usually absent in is carefree demeanor, painted you a picture of his current inner turmoil. When you shifted your gaze to meet with his narrowed eyes, the cautious padding of your bare feet seemed to echo.

It was an unfamiliar sight to witness Charles engulfed in such a storm of emotions. The stark contrast to his usual carefree and joyful demeanor.  He was blinded by his rage as he muttered the next words.

“Es-tu idiote?” Are you stupid? His jaw was clenched. A soft gasp left your lips as you clutched tighter onto the top of your towel, feeling rather exposed now. “Demande à Christian Dior.” Ask Christian Dior. His spat out the name Christian Dior with such disdain. As if it were dirt on the bottom of his shoe.

Your eyes widened, everything clicking. You weren’t sure how he knew, but he was answering your internal thoughts before words could form on your tongue.

“Ils t’ont appelé. J’ai répondu par erreur.” They called you. I answered by mistake. He let out a loud sigh as he leaned against the dresser across from the end of the bed, his forearms flexing as he gripped onto it tightly. You noticed the definition of his muscles and veins forming on his arms. He was squeezing the dresser, trying to gain some relief from such anger swirling within him.

At first, you wanted to argue him for answering your phone. But you knew him. You knew he wasn’t snooping. He said it was a mistake, so you took his word for it.

“Qu’ont-ils dit?” What did they say? You weren’t sure how to approach this conversation with him. You especially were not expecting it to go this way, with you wrapped in only a cotton towel.

His eyes narrowed to an almost imperceptible slit, the vibrant green drained from any warmth of presence. “Are you serious?” The exasperation in his voice reverberated through the room. Your question seemed to strike a nerve, leaving him incredulous. Was that all you had to say? The absence of an explanation hung in the air, adding more tension to the charged atmosphere between you two.

“Ne me crie pas dessus.” Don’t yell at me. You felt your own anger building at his attitude. Who did he think he was? You padded back to your suitcase, grabbing whatever outfit you could without paying attention. You weren’t sure what you even grabbed or if it even matched, but you didn’t care. You were too busy listening to Charles raise his voice.

“Don’t walk away from me.” He pushed off the dresser, trailing behind you. “What is this internship you applied for?”

You didn’t answer right away, instilling more anger within Charles. “Answer me. You’re just going to leave like always?” His tone struck you with disbelief, the harshness leaving an unexpected sting. The air was too intense. You needed to get some air.

Like always?

You turned and faced him. “Are you asking me as my boss or my fuck buddy?” You knew it was a low blow, but it was so unfair for him to be this mean to you. It wasn’t even necessarily his words but his tone that bothered you most. He spoke to you as if you were a child who needed punishing.

You had a shirt half-way over your head and black leggings on. “It’s just a summer internship. I didn’t even do the interview yet, but you seem to know that already.” You waved him off, rushing around the room to get your stuff. You needed to get out of here. You weren’t going to sit here and let him berate you.

“You can’t just leave.” He followed you to the door, gripping your wrist to pull you back towards him. You yanked your arm out of his grip.

“You’re just like everyone else.” His words tumbled out incoherently, much like uncontrollable word vomit. He could feel the panic rising in him as you made your way towards the door. “Right. Use me and then leave. It’s all I’m good for.”

His words twisted your stomach, and you chose to overlook the burning ache in your heart.

“Fine. Just go fuck your ex-boyfriend or something. Or Lando. I know he wants you.” He stood there, chest heaving up and down with his heavy breaths. You pulled the door open, standing in the frame, you took one last glance at him.

“Va te faire foutre.” Go fuck yourself. And with that you were out the door.

-

“Je n’arrive pas à le croire!” I can’t believe him! “C’est vraiment un connard.” He’s really such an asshole.

“Babes, you’re g’na need to speak in English for me to understand,” he laughed before taking a sip of his beer, “you muppet.”

You playfully rolled your eyes at Lando, seated across from you in the elegant ambiance of the hotel restaurant. Adorned in a snug black dress, every curve of your figure accentuated, the crystal jewels meticulously tracing the contours of your breasts. The garment displayed a subtle dip between your cleavage, adding an enthralling touch. It was safe to say you looked fucking good. Or as Lando said, “holy fucking shit, you took the air out of my lungs.” Which in response, you couldn’t resist a playful shove to his shoulder.

In the aftermath of the argument with Charles, you found yourself in the company of Lando, driven partly by Charles’s mention of him. Despite the strained circumstances, your connection with Lando remained strictly platonic. However, Lando’s penchant for flirting was a constant, adding a playful dynamic that colored your friendship. Thankfully for Lando, he was the reason you were able to even get a change of clothes seeing as you left the hotel room earlier in complete disarray. It was still your day off, one that was originally supposed to be spent with Charles. Lorenzo and Charlotte were still taking care of Charles’s daughter, leaving your night wide open.

“Martin’s driver is picking us up soon,” Lando declared, drowning the remainder of his beer and emphatically slamming the bottle onto the table. There was still two more days before the race weekend began, meaning Lando wanted to go out to which you agreed easily. Meanwhile, you maintained a composed sip from your glass of wine. With a playful glint in his eye, Lando added, “Get your dance moves ready muppet.” The prospect of the evening ahead seemed to carry a promise of lively escapades.

Your laughter echoed, creating a buoyant atmosphere as you seamlessly fell into a comfortable conversation with Lando. His easy-going nature and banter helped soothe the lingering nerves from the earlier argument with Charles. In that moment, you felt nothing but gratitude for Lando’s presence.

-

The vibrant lights of the club painted the atmosphere in a kaleidoscope of colors, while the unmistakable scent of alcohol lingered in the air. The club pulsated with energy of the intoxicated crowd, bodies swaying to the vibrations of music surrounding them. It wasn’t until you reached the DJ booth that you felt a wave of reassurance wash over you. 

The night unfolded with a multitude of shots, some in which you had to pretend to take, just to save yourself from vomiting on the floor. The music provided a lively group, thus creating a joyous atmosphere. You surrendered to the rhythm, dancing through the hours, deliberately steering clear of thoughts about the brunette Monegasque who typically occupied your mind.

As you slid out of the booth, making your way to the bathroom, you finally pulled your phone out of your purse. The screen was littered with missed calls and multiple messages, most from nonetheless Charles.

from Charles (dilf)    Where are you?                                              18:45 You’re such a brat.                                          19:19 Really? You’re with Lando?                             22:47 Could your dress be any fucking shorter?    22:51 Tu essaies de me tuer                                  01:27 You’re really testing my patience                01:46

You didn’t answer. Feeling triumphant as you snickered to yourself at his messages, him clearly struggling with the concept of you being out with Lando. Slipping the phone back into your purse, you continued your night, leaving all worries behind. Because if you didn’t, the mere reality of the argument with Charles would have you vomiting on the floor.

-

It was honestly insane how the sun was just beginning to rise. Yet, you and Lando were just stepping foot into the hotel not even a few minutes ago, drunken laughter between you both as you exited the elevator to Lando's floor. No doubt, pictures of you and Lando surfacing all over the internet tonight. But you weren’t worried about that. What you were worried about was the angry brunette standing outside of Lando’s hotel room door, his arms crossed, and eyes tired as if he didn’t sleep the entire night.

You and Lando both sobered up quickly from the sight of him, brooding in front of the hotel door. Charles opened his mouth, utilizing both of your native tongue to exclude Lando from the conversation.

“Tu es putain de sérieuse?” Are you fucking serious? The harsh tone he used drew you back to the argument that had occurred earlier in the day. Or should you say yesterday?

“Que fais-tu ici?” What are you doing here?

He rolled his eyes, teeth gritting as he looked over to Lando smiling beside you with his hotel room key in hand. “Muppet, are you sleeping over, or no? I’m tired.”

Charles didn’t afford you a moment to respond before swiftly shutting him down. The gaze he directed at Lando carried a lethal intensity, a silent warning that spoke volumes. “Absolutely fucking not.” Charles’s grip tightened on your arm, an assertive pull guiding you down the hallway toward the elevator. Surprisingly, you didn’t resist, allowing the momentum to carry you forward. You looked back at Lando who had a smirk on his face and winked at you. What a fucker.

The elevator enveloped you both in an oppressive silence, interrupted only by rhythmic beeping accompanying each floor you ascended. Charles maintained a deliberate gap between you, yet his hand remained firmly clasped around your wrist. In the mirrored surface of the doors, your eyes locked onto each other, breaths syncing. As the doors finally opened, Charles propelled you out with a gentle push, his body behind yours. 

It wasn’t until you both stepped into the hotel room that Charles unleashed a torrent of emotions upon you. His voice, thick with a mixture of anger, jealousy, hurt, and worry, carried the weight of the pent-up emotions he had been harboring. He had seen the stories, the posts, and even the photos of you at dinner, images captured by fans.

The way you smiled at Lando in the pictures had him throwing his phone. And don’t even get him started on the dress. The fucking dress.

“Do you like Lando?” He sneered, jealousy bubbling inside of his chest.

And because you felt like stirring the pot even more, you smirked. “Yes.” And although it was the truth, it wasn’t what Charles thought. You felt bad as you saw his face fall, but he deserved it just for a little bit at the very least.

You could feel all the thoughts racing through Charles head before he pulled you both towards the balcony, staring at the city skyline instead of at you. He pinched the bridge of his nose, his voice thickening with emotion, “What about me? What about us?”

“As a friend.” You finally announced, turning your body to fully face Charles. “I like Lando as a friend, Cha.” You confirmed, a groan leaving your lips. “Do we have to do this right now? I’m so tired and my feet hurt.”

“Oui.” Allowing no room for further complaints, Charles pulled you into an embrace, his arms enveloping you and effectively trapping you between the warmth of his body and the balcony railing. He nestled his head in the crook of your neck, finding a moment of relief in the reassurance that you were back, and in his arms. The tight hold on you spoke of relief.

“You’re mine,” He states. “Label or no label.” He's possessive in the way he speaks and touches you. Like he needs to get his point across. You feel him laugh as his fingers trail around your front side, trailing down until he can slip them up the front of your dress, pressing his fingers to your lace covered core. It was almost too easy. The dress was so short.

The desperate ache in the pit of your tummy grows with each swipe of his thumb along your covered clit. You began to forget why you were even fighting in the first place, his hands on you felt too good. You lulled your head back against him, making more room for his lips to attack on your neck.

Your ability to articulate words faltered, your legs turning to jell-o under his embrace. With one arm securely wrapped around your waist, he became your anchor, ensuring that you remained standing. 

“You want my fingers?” His lips are hot on your ear. He slips his fingers beneath your underwear, feeling just how wet you really are. It was almost too easy. “So fucking wet and warm, mmm.” He groans as he slips one finger inside of you, moving it so slowly that you began to get frustrated with the pace. Your hips rut, trying to speed up his fingers, but he holds you in place removing your ability to move.

Your body begins to tremble as he increases the pace of his finger, inserting another one and curling it, hitting the spot you ached most. You want to cum so badly; you want to soak his fingers and tremble around them. “So greedy.” He takes your ear lobe in between his teeth, nibbling gently on it before trailing his tongue down the rest of your neck. “Taking my fingers so well.”

You groaned, his words pushing you towards your climax quicker than anticipated. He could tell you close with the way you were squeezing his fingers so tightly, and the way your words were almost incoherent. As soon as your arm reached back, your fingers brushing through his hair, he pulled his fingers out of you.

“No!” You half-shrieked at the loss of contact, pulling his hair in the process. Your face blushed and eyebrows furrowed from the loss of his fingers.

“Tell me you’re mine.” He flips your body around, your back flush against the balcony railing now. The breeze continues to blow your hair around, no doubt making a mess of it.

“You tell me you’re mine.” You bite back, refusing to say it first. Charles began laughing, it reverberated in his chest. 

“Oh, mon ange.” He ignores what you say, trailing his eyes down your body. “This fucking dress.” His words are sharp as he begins gripping the ends of your dress and shoving it upwards, exposing you completely to him now. He placed a quick slap of his finger tips to your clit, the shock and sting of the slap turning you on more than you could imagine.

He pulls you forward, hands squeezing your neck, the area right under your jaw line to be more specific, lips immediately pressing against yours. There was nothing gentle about this kiss. It was hot, messy, and wet. A clashing of teeth and tongue as he sucked on your tongue. Leaving you almost no room to breathe in the process. But you didn’t mind, his kisses were intoxicating.

The firm presence of Charles’s hand on your neck persisted, the subtle pressure from the pads of his fingers inducing a dizzying effect. It was a tactile reminder of his control, a touch that left your head spinning, and wanting more. “I’ve always been yours.” He doesn’t let you respond before he’s pulling your lips back to his. This time, his fingers slip back into your heated core, assaulting and curling them just how you needed them. You breathed hotly into his mouth as your orgasm crashed over you. It was quick and hot. Charles could’ve sworn he was going to cum right in his pants at the feeling of you squeezing his fingers, coating them in you. He’s never been more jealous of his fingers in his life.

He flips you around again, fumbling with the button of his pants as he shoves them down, them falling to a pile around his ankles. He wasn’t slow, rubbing the tip of his cock through your slick folds, he teased you both for a little bit.

When he finally slipped into you, you swore you were going to cum again. You had to squeeze the railing harder to prevent yourself from doing so. You wanted to cum with him. 

“Squeezing me so well.” He moaned, the wind picking up and the only glimmer of light was from the sun barely peeping over the horizon. You couldn’t believe you were doing this, out in the open of a hotel balcony, but the thrill of it made it that much more exciting.

“Tu aimes ça, hm?” You like that? He pushes you forward so that your chest was pressed to the railing, your head dangling over the edge as you looked down from the height of the building. Everything looked so small from this height. “Want the whole world to know you’re mine.” He continues.

“Want to fill you up.” You clench hard around him, soft moans escaping your lips into the air in response. Charles couldn’t help but feel his heart pound as he muttered the next words. “Want to fill you up with my cum, want to fuck a baby into you.” 

At first, he was nervous muttering the words aloud. But the clench of your pussy around his cock only eased his nerves. Your moans increasing in volume told him just how much you liked that too.

“Merde,” Shit. You were mewling into the open air, the increase in pace of his hips had you seeing stars. 

“Are you gonna let me?”

“Yes!” You were yelling it repeatedly. His fingers crawled their way around your body, slipping into the dip in the front of your dress and pinching your nipples. He rolled your nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

“C’mon donne-le moi.” Give it to me. And boy did you. You both came with a loud cry, the sound of his hips slapping into your backside a faint noise compared to the moans. The warmth of his cum seeping into you for the second time in less than 24 hours. Although, you were on the pill, you still liked to play along with the idea of being pregnant. The idea of Charles filling you up turned you on like no other.

You both took a few seconds to recoup, trying to catch your breath. He pulled out slowly, but brought his fingers down, pushing the mixture of both of your cum back inside you. He didn’t want a single drop of it to go to waste. 

He turned you around, bringing your lips to a sweet kiss.

“Je suis désolée.” I’m sorry.  His eyes hold your own. “I should’ve said it sooner. I didn’t mean any of it, I swear. The idea of you leaving had me freaked out, you didn’t deserve any of it. You..”

A small smile graces your lips as you see how genuine he is and you lean up on your tippy toes, bringing your lips back to his. Essentially shutting him up, his hands wrap back around you, lifting you off the ground as he carries you back into the hotel room, both of you collapsing into the bed.

“Even if I got a new job, I’m still yours.” You started. “But actually, there’s this great nanny job I heard about.” Charles feels panic forming in his chest again. But you continue on, “It involves the cutest little girl ever. I also heard that the dad is so hot and cool. Did I mention he’s single?” You joke, laughter erupting between the both of you as he cradles you into his body.

“I don’t think he’s single.”

“Yeah. He definitely isn’t.”

And that was all he needed to hear.

[renthony]

Cross-posted from Facebook, via a good friend:

Gooood morning, comrades! My Law360 colleagues and I walked off the job today because LexisNexis tried to illegally fire 10% of our newsrooooom! Corporate announced this plan the same day that they declared high revenue and profit growth. That day, its parent company RELX (which many of my academic friends know — OH BOY do they EVER know — as Reed Elsevier) also announced it would spend $1.25 billion in stock buybacks. Last Friday, the company went ahead with the layoffs and broke the law. The Law360 Union has walked off the job and stands united against these layoffs. We’re demanding they reinstate our colleagues and bargain fairly. You can help by: • Sharing this post and our letter about the illegal layoffs. • Contributing to our strike hardship fund, because we’re all losing pay to make this point. • Contributing to our fund to support our colleagues on the layoff list. • And, most importantly, share this with any legal practitioners, students or scholars you know and ask them to tell Law360 to stop breaking the law! We work hard to provide you with some of the best legal reporting and analysis out there, so now we need you. Help us!

[princessbrunette]

dbf!john b who whispers “gooood girl” “doing so well for daddy” very quietly while while you sink down on his dick and covers your mouth with his big ass hands bc your dad is in the next room and you keep squealing

i’m squealing just reading this tbh …… having u split open on his lap with one hand cupping the back of your head and the other clamped over your mouth, looking at you with those wide desperate eyes, nodding and whispering “gooood job, baby. good girl. taking me real nice.” when you finally sink down to the hilt 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

[hannieween]

HEY BAE. could you recommend some GOOOOD jeonghan smut fics. Like i'm talking filthy & emotional, and everything else in between.

HEHE CAN'T WAIT FOR YOUR KINKTOBER SPECIAL!! mwah love u so much THANKYOU for feeding us such good fics~ 🙂‍↕️🫶🏼

oooooooooh

i have some wait hold on

cold hearted jeonghan by my girl @hoshifighting

think i need someone older series by @gyuhao5

my guardian demon sucks at his job by @shuaflix

do you remember the time? by @wonustars

oni jeonghan by @kwanisms

blame it on me by @onlymingyus

good vibrations by @shuadotcom

those are the ones i can link from my tags (don't know why not all of my posts are showing in my tags) but i know you'll have a good time with these and i fully recommend anything else these authors have written (✿◠‿◠)

thank you 🫵🏻 so much baby!! 🙂‍↕️🩵

[uchiwife]

∧,,,∧ ~ ┏━━━━━━━━━┓

( ̳• · • ̳) ~ ♡𝐍𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐨 | 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ♡

/ づ ~ ┗━━━━━━━━━┛

⋆˚✿˖° 𝖢𝖮𝖬𝖯𝖫𝖤𝖳𝖤𝖣 ⋆˚✿˖°

𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : The story follows Itachi and Sakura throughout their lives, from childhood to adulthood.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings: fluff, so sweet it'll give you cavities. (Story containing gifs narrated with text) | Posted on August 12, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ ⤷ Read here

𝗵𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗸

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura loves playing hide-and-seek with Naruto and Sasuke, her two best friends, but today she found something quite different.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : pre-genin era, fluff, humor, no uchiha massacre [ Posted on August 19, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ ⤷ read here

𝗔𝘀𝗵𝗲𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura always looked forward to his summoning crows because it meant she would finally see him again, but today the crow appeared when she least expected it... And Itachi rarely deviates from his plans. So this can't be a good omen, can it?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : The Uchiha massacre happened, Heavy angst, major character death. [Posted on August 23, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗧𝗼𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗮𝘆!

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Today is the day Sakura decided to confess her love to her long time friend. She thinks it might be time to either win him over or move on… 𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐓. Is that Itachi!? Oh my gooood. Did he just kiss a girl!?!?!?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Slice of life, fluff, angst and some humor. [Posted on September 11, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on Ao3 「Last edited May 20, 2024.」

𝗠𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno & Shisui Uchiha/ Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura loves him. She knows she does. Yet he seems determined to believe that she’s mistaken about the nature of her feelings.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : unrequited love? Confused!Sakura. Slight humor, eventual romance [Posted on September 30, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on Ao3

𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗱

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha, Sakura Haruno/Gaara , Naruto Uzumaki/Hinata Hyuuga

✩彡 ･ﾟ Characters : Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Itachi, Sabaku no Gaara, etc. ( some characters will only be mentioned.)

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Maybe Sakura was wrong. Maybe she had been fooling herself about him. Maybe she had imagined half of their interactions. Maybe it was all in her head. That must be it, otherwise how could she explain what she had witnessed?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Epic friendship, romance, humor, fluff, unrequited love or is it?, angst, open ending [Posted on December 5, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on Ao3

𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴��𝘁𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Shisui was just a soldier, witnessing the violence and atrocities of war since he was old enough to walk, and then there she was, surrounded by flowers, the most beautiful of all, his lovely cherry blossom. Pure, innocent, she was the most beautiful landscape he'd ever seen. (Story containing gifs narrated with text.)

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : first love, romance, heavy angst, implied/referenced violence, 4GNW, major character death [Posted on March 29, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗥𝗮𝗽𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝘀𝗼 𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha , Naruto Uzumaki/Sasuke Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : A woman walks into a bar… et le reste appartient à l’histoire.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, sexual tension, implied sexual content, implied/referenced blow jobs, drinking, jealousy, fluff without plot, friendships, eventual romance, no Uchiha massacre, past Haruno Sakura/Hyuuga Neji, awkward & secret crush. [Posted on April 1, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗛𝘂𝗿𝘁𝘀 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗠𝗼𝘀𝘁

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura doesn't know when it started, but she knows how it will end. After all, she’s once again dealing with an Uchiha. It must be her curse.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : medic Haruno Sakura, Anbu Uchiha Itachi, angst, injury, emotional hurt, denial of feelings, fights, arguments, break up, male-female friendship, misunderstanding, alcohol, some humor, eventual fluff, angst with a happy ending [Posted on April 23, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗲 𝘁𝗼𝗹𝗱

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha , Uchiha Itachi/Shisui Uchiha, Sakura Haruno/Undisclosed

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : What's the point of being sorry? The damage is already done.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, cheating, hurt no comfort, implied sexual content, attempt at humor, fluff, heartbreak, angst with a happy ending [Posted on June 14, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼’𝗱 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Itachi

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura loves movies, popcorn and yelling at the characters on her TV screen. And then there's Itachi.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : friends to lovers, fluff & humor, short&sweet, childhood memories, movie reference, OS, romantic comedy [Posted on July 22, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗔𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Sasuke ft Narusakusasu [platonic]

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : They’re friends, right?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : canon divergence, friends to lovers, no Uchiha massacre, fluff & humor, team 7 as family, past relationships, male-female friendship, eventual romance, jealousy if you squint, idiots in love, possessive uchiha sasuke [Posted on November 3, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗛𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗿

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : “I need an angel to save me from myself. Holding my savior keep my heart upon the shelf.”

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : strangers to friends to lovers, Uchiha massacre, canon divergence, near death experience, character death, slow romance, canon-typical violence, platonic soulmates, hint of narusasu, team 7 as family, BAMF Haruno Sakura, angst with a happy ending [Posted on November 5, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗮𝗹

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Sasuke

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : “ […] She fidgeted under his gaze. He'd always had a particular way of scrutinizing her. It was almost as if he was looking into her soul, and it was sometimes quite unsettling, but that was Sasuke.”

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, friends to lovers, feeling realization, misunderstanding, idiots in love, fluff & humor, childhood friends, tooth-rotting fluff, protective Uchiha Sasuke, pop culture references [Posted on November 24, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗪𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲, 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Past Sakura Haruno/Kin Tsuchi, Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Shisui

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : "This mɑn - for there's no doubt thɑt this strɑnger is one - hɑs no business meddling in her ɑffɑirs. He doesn't hɑve to hold her like he's ɑfrɑid she'll disɑppeɑr, like he knows her, like she's one of his loved ones. She's none of those things. She’s nothing."

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : heavy angst, suicide attempt, minor character death, depression, bisexual Haruno Sakura, post-break up, dark humor, family loss, pre-relationship, eventual fluff, movie reference, angst with a happy (hopeful) ending [Posted on December 8, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗬𝘂𝗮𝗻𝗳𝗲𝗻

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Madara Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : [yiun-fen] • Chinese

(𝗇.) 𝖺 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉 𝖻𝗒 𝖿𝖺𝗍𝖾 𝗈𝗋 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗒;

𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖻𝗂𝗇𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖼𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝗍𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Reincarnation, historical references, soulmates, canon divergence, civil war, falling in love, angst, major character death, 4GNW, minor sasusaku, bittersweet ending. [Posted on April 12, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗼𝘂𝘀𝘆 [𝗙𝗔𝗞𝗘 𝗧𝗘𝗫𝗧𝗦]

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Shisui

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Shisui may be feeling a little jealous, or maybe he's just imagining things.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : light angst, jealousy, insecurity, mention of past sexual relationship, fluff. [Posted on April 13, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗦𝘂𝗯𝘀𝘁𝗶𝘁𝘂𝘁𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Itachi

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Itachi loves Sakura, but not enough to be a substitute for his little brother, but is he really?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : light angst, past sasusaku, fluff at the end. [Posted on July 30, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here (NEW RELEASE!!)

𝗖𝗿𝘂𝘀𝗵 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝗖𝘂𝗽

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Shisui Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura works part-time at a coffee shop, but her thoughts of Shisui are full-time on top.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings: Friendships, fluff, past-relationships, light angst, pre-relationship, friends to lovers, eventual romance, OS, ambiguous/open ending. [Posted on September 25, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ ⤷ Read here or here (NEW RELEASE!!)

⋆˚✿˖°𝖮𝖭 𝖦𝖮𝖨𝖭𝖦...⋆˚✿˖°

𝗪𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗱

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/ Itachi Uchiha, Sakura Haruno & Shisui Uchiha, Itachi Uchiha & Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : They say that pain builds character, if so, then Sakura must have built a strong one.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Established relationships, Heavy angst, hurt no comfort, drama, break up, modern setting, jealousy, friendship, eventual fluff, making out, sexual tension, protective shisui uhiha, illegal activities, murder, possibly unrequited love, denial of feelings, arguing, fights, implied/referenced character death,. [posted on April 26, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3 (Last updated March 16, 2024)

𝗗𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿𝗼𝘂𝘀 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗿𝗲𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Itachi Uchiha/Original female character(s), Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno, minor Sakura Haruno/Hoshigaki Kisame, minor Shisui Uchiha/Haruno Sakura etc,.

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura knows she shouldn't, she knows it's wrong. She knows she’s a horrible person for even thinking about building her happiness on someone else’s pain. She wants to be selfish. But he's no better, is he? He wants to take, take and own everything she is. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Itachi is selfish like that. Or maybe they're just two jerks who deserve each other.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, toxic relationships, Itachi is a little shit, cheating, sexual tension, manipulation, jealousy, angst, morally ambiguous, possessive behavior, implied sexual content, implied blow jobs, religion kink, humor, sexually experienced Sakura Haruno, love/hate, drama, gay character. [posted on May 9, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3 (Last updated July 2, 2024)

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗵 𝗼𝗳 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura & Shisui, Uchiha, Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Shisui

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : He comes home late, acts strangely, and she doesn't recognize him anymore. Time passes and things get worse. Maybe it's time to know what's really in the depths of her heart.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, heavy angst, domestic violence, hurt no comfort, established relationship, drug use, emotional infidelity, unrequited love?, drama romance, drug addiction, falling in love, arguing, eventual happy ending. [Posted on May 10, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗞𝗲𝗲𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗨𝗽 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗨𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗵𝗮

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : […] as she took a bite of her gyoza, Sakura wondered — and she would wonder for years to come - what on earth had possessed her to cause such a scandal during such a convivial dinner.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, drama & romance, angst, attempt at humor, cheating, shisui is acting suspiciously, misunderstanding, arguing, fluff, implied sexual content. [Posted on March 30, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here (Last updated May 31, 2023)

𝗦𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗗𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : At the age of 6, Sakura believes there are only 4 essential things in this world: her parents, anmitsu, Ino Yamanaka and Shisui Uchiha.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Modern AU, Unrequited love, Friendship, Multiple pairings, From childhood to adulthood, Angst [ with an eventual] happy ending. [Posted on October 5, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗦𝗶𝗹𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵𝘀, 𝗴𝗼𝗹𝗱𝗲𝗻 𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Hidan, Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : 'Did he love her or was she just a trophy for him? Was she just a hole he could empty himself into whenever he felt like it, even when she didn't?'

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : angst, toxic relationships, gaslighting, verbal abuse, verbal humiliation, emotional infidelity, cheating, self-esteem issues, implied/referenced domestic violence, implied sexual content, panic attacks, Hidan swears, some fluff etc., [Posted on October 13, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗖𝗮𝗻’𝘁 𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha, Shisui Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : You can't control your heart. Feelings come and go. We are only slaves to its whims.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : established relationship, love triangle, angst, falling in love, unrequited love, friendship/love, emotional infidelity, possibly polyamorous relationship, Awkward tension Itachi is so confused. [Posted on April 28, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here (Last updated January 21, 2024)

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗲𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : “Three months. It had been three months since he'd sat at the same table, at the same time, taking the same thing in order to take part in what had become a ritual. He'd sensed that today was the day. That the young woman would eventually come to him.”

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, mafia, police, pre-relationship, (possible) future fic. Given the theme, expect to read about sensitive subjects. Such as mentions of abuse, drugs, violence, illegal trafficking in almost any form. Please proceed with caution. [Posted on February 21, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗟𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗶𝗻𝗷𝗮 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗺

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno, Undisclosed Relationship(s)

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura is a country girl who dreams of the big city. She always thought she'd travel someday, but the universe got in the way and now she's trapped in Konoha, except it's wasn't her Konoha. Stuck now with familiar but unfamiliar faces, she must find a way to navigate this new world.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings: Isekai fic. | Posted on September 19, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ ⤷ Read here (NEW RELEASE!!)

⋆˚✿˖°𝖣𝖱𝖠𝖡𝖡𝖫𝖤, 𝖥𝖨𝖢𝖫𝖤𝖳 & 𝖶𝖨𝖯.⋆˚✿˖°

𝗡𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗺𝗲, 𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗽𝗮𝗶!

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : A short, funny story featuring Itachi and Sakura in modern times.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, fluff, modern au [Posted on November 13, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗦𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗱 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno ft Sasuke Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Just Sasuke answering Sakura's stupid questions.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, crack fic [Posted on November 17, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗸 𝘂𝗽

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura thinks it's time to break up.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : past crush, fake/pretend relationship, break up, humor, fluff, modern setting [Posted on November 27, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on Ao3

𝗗𝗿𝘂𝗻𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Itachi falling on a drunk but adorable Sakura.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, fluff, drunk!sakura [Posted on December 12, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗡𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗜 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Playing drinking games is fun, Itachi thinks, until scandalous revelations come to light.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : established relationships, Alcohol, Mention of past sexual relations, humor, friendship, threesome implied etc., [Posted on December 15, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗳𝘂𝗺 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲𝗿

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Itachi Uchiha/Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Everybody seems to like spring.🍃����

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : implied sexual content, threesome - F/M/M, sexual humor, romantic friendship, friends to lovers, eventual relationships, fluff, humor, Implied polyamory. [Posted on March 21, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗦𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝘆𝗼𝘂

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : It's 3 a.m., Shisui is drunk and thinks he's Stefan Salvatore.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, parody [Posted on April 6, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗦𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗖𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗼𝗺𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto (platonic soulmates)

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : He was her sunshine on rainy days.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : fluff with light angst [posted on May 20, 2023]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗕𝗲𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗰̧𝗮𝗱𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Itachi Uchiha/ Unnamed Girlfriend , Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha, Yamanaka Ino & Sakura Haruno, Haruno Sakura & Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sometimes anger hides something else.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, enemies to friends to lovers (not really enemies), rivalry, angst, drama, female friendship, jealousy, frustration, denial of feelings, love/hate, unrequited hate, possible unrequited love, implied/referenced cheating, unreliable narrator, possible future fic [Posted on July 23, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗡𝗮𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Boruto wondered if Itachi-nii had changed his name.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Set in the era of Boruto's next generation, humor [Posted on July 24, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗼𝗹

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Shisui asks Sakura out.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : Tooth-rotting fluff, attempt at humor [Posted on August 30, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗡𝗮𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀 (𝟮)

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha ft Sasuke Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sasuke is annoyed. Is his teammate dating his brother because he looks like him?

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : parody (kind of) humor, established relationship (Posted on September 29, 2023.)

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗦𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗻𝗲𝘄

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : They’re in love, your honor.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : no Uchiha massacre, fluff, established relationship, sexual humor, sexual fantasy, implied sexual content, no smut, awkward romance [Posted on October 10, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗡𝗮𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗾𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Just Sakura madly in love with her man

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : fluff [Posted on October 11, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗛𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Uchiha Itachi “as” Ross Geller. That’s it.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : fluff, light angst [Posted on November 9, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗣𝗶𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha ft Sasuke Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sasuke is babysitting his nephew for the weekend.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor, married couple, uncle sasuke [Posted on November 11, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗦𝗮𝗸𝘂𝗿𝗮 𝗶𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗶𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura speaks randomly in French to Itachi.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : established relationship, humor, fluff. [Posted on November 14, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗮𝗯𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝘀

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Shisui Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura wants to break up, but she also wants Kung Pao chicken and spring rolls.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : humor & fluff [Posted on December 27, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗡𝗮𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗾𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀 (𝟮)

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : mention of Itasaku, feat Sasuke

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : In which Sasuke learns that Sakura has an active sex life, and that Itachi, his older brother, is part of it.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : mention of past sexual relationships, crack, humor, dating [Posted on January 9, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗦𝗮𝗸𝘂𝗿𝗮

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Itasaku, NejiSaku, DeiSaku, HakuSaku, Sakura/Orochimaru, IzuSaku

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Sakura has a thing for men with long hair. She always has. That's why, when she takes part in a show designed to get all her exes in the same room, they realize that they have only one thing in common: their hair length.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : modern setting, past relationship(s), suggestive themes, crackfic, humor, Sakura is so done, all her boyfriends are nuts!! [Posted on January 17 & 18, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here or on ao3

𝗠𝗲𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝘆 𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗹𝘂𝗰𝗸… 𝗜'𝗱 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗯𝘆 𝗧𝗶𝗸𝘁𝗼𝗸

✩彡 ･ﾟPairings : Sakura Haruno/Uchiha Shisui

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary : Just shisui falling in love with sakura at first sight.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent warnings : fluff without plot, some humor, romantic comedy [Posted on March 31, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ read here

⋆˚✿˖°𝖯𝖨𝖢𝖲/𝖵𝖨𝖣𝖤𝖮𝖲/𝖦𝖨𝖥𝖲 𝖨'𝖵𝖤 𝖤𝖣𝖨𝖳𝖤𝖣 𝖮𝖱 𝖢𝖱𝖤𝖠𝖳𝖤𝖣⋆˚✿˖°

𝗜𝗹𝗹𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟSummary: Imagine Sakura admiring Itachi's beauty in the rain. He knows she's there, but doesn't acknowledge her presence. Looking at him, she wonders how she ended up in the hands of the Akatsuki, first as a prisoner, then as Itachi's lover. Sakura fell in love with her former teammate's enemy.

Itachi is a man of few words and sometimes Sakura wonders if what they share is an illusion or reality. But it's in his subtle gestures and the way his body mold to hers during their sinful nights that she knows Itachi feels as much as she does, that he is on her side now and forever.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent type : Video. [Posted on September 18, 2022.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ watch here

𝗧𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗶 𝗱𝗶𝗲 𝗯𝘆 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟContext : 𝖲𝖺𝗄𝗎𝗋𝖺 𝗁𝖺𝗌 𝖺𝗅𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝖺 𝘩𝘶𝘨𝘦 𝖼𝗋𝗎𝗌𝗁 𝗈𝗇 𝖨𝗍𝖺𝖼𝗁𝗂. 𝖲𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝖽𝗆𝗂𝗋𝖾𝗌 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗌𝗉𝗂𝗋𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾 𝖺𝗌 𝗀𝗈𝗈𝖽 𝖺 𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗈𝖻𝗂 𝖺𝗌 𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖽𝖺𝗒. 𝖲𝗈 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝗋��𝗂𝗇𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗅𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗅𝗒 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝗆𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝗎𝗉 𝗍𝗈 𝗁𝗂𝗆, 𝗈𝗋 𝖺𝗍 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝖻𝖾 𝗍𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘭. 𝖲𝗁𝖾 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗈𝗇𝗅𝗒 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗈 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖺𝗅𝗌𝗈 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖴𝖼𝗁𝗂𝗁𝖺 𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋. 𝖳𝗈 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝖼𝖺𝗉𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗍𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗁𝗂𝗆. 𝖨𝗇 𝖿𝖺𝖼𝗍, 𝗍𝗈 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗀𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍 𝗌𝗎𝗋𝗉𝗋𝗂𝗌𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗆𝗎𝗌𝖾𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍, 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗎𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗌𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝖾𝗋𝗒 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗁𝗂𝗆. 𝖨𝗍𝖺𝖼𝗁𝗂 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗋𝗎𝗌𝗁 𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖽𝖾𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗆𝗂𝗇𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗋 𝖺𝖽𝗆𝗂𝗋𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾. 𝖲𝖺𝗄𝗎𝗋𝖺 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖺𝗇𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝗈 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖻𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖴𝖼𝗁𝗂𝗁𝖺'𝗌 𝗌𝗂𝖽𝖾, 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝗆𝗎𝗌𝖾𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝖽 𝗈𝗇𝖾𝗌.

𝖨𝗍 𝗐𝖺𝗌𝗇'𝗍 𝗎𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗅 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗈𝗅𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖨𝗍𝖺𝖼𝗁𝗂 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝖺𝗆𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝗇 𝗁𝖾𝗋, 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝗐𝖺𝗒 𝗁𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝖺 𝖼𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖽, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺.

𝖨𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖾𝗇𝖽, 𝖲𝖺𝗄𝗎𝗋𝖺 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖺𝖼𝗁𝗂𝖾𝗏𝖾𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗀𝗈𝖺𝗅𝗌.

𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘭𝘭, 𝘜𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘥, 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘣𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘶𝘭.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent type : Video. [Posted on September 24, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ watch here

𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟContext : A love/hate AU where Sakura would have been in love with Itachi all her life, but when he slaughters the uchiha clan (except for Sasuke) she finds herself heartbroken. She hears of Itachi's prowess throughout the five great Shinobi nations. He even joins the Akatsuki, much to her dismay. So she vows to bring Itachi to justice and bring him back to the village, even if it means dying. In this AU, Sakura is much stronger than in the canon, having devoted herself to her training from an early age.

Of course, she is unaware that the Uchiha massacre was ordered by the village's higher-ups, and that Itachi is in fact a spy.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent type : GIF. [Posted on October 24, 2023.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ watch here

𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗿𝗼𝘄 𝘀𝗽𝗼𝘁𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗼𝗺

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟContext : inspired by this.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent type : Edited Pics. [Posted on January 29, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ watch here

𝗠𝗮𝗱𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲

✩彡 ･ﾟPairing : Sakura Haruno/Itachi Uchiha

✩彡 ･ﾟContext : None. Just Itachi and Sakura being pretty.

✩彡 ･ﾟContent type : Edited Pic. [Posted on April 3, 2024.]

✩彡 ･ﾟ⤷ watch here

⋆˚✿˖° REQUESTS⋆˚✿˖°

.

.

. …. None for the moment, it's a new concept. If you feel like it, you can send me some. If you're shy, you can do it anonymously. All I ask is that you remain respectful and kind.♡

[softcitrus2345]

Just got this DELICIOUS commission from my buddy @onecuriousthoughtafteranother and I am going absolutely BALLISTIC God Shop did SUCH an amazing job with this... AAAHH- I could just stare at this all day and giggle and kick my little feet 'cause oh my GOOOOD-

IT'S PERFECT. LOOK AT THEM. THEY'RE SO CUTE AND CHEEKY AND SWEET AND SOFT AND IN LOVE I CAN'T

This just perfectly sums up their relationship with this niche it's so GOOD. Here's an alt. version of the doodle in the middle as well! It was too good not to include it here~

Money ABSOLUTELY well spent, please go show Shop some well-deserved love!!!

(also teeheee... booty- >;3c)

[lil-bitty-lubdubs]

The Basement Series-Septima pt.2

Part 2

“Yes. That’s it darling. That’s it. Give in to it! That a girl. Gooood. That’s right. Take a deep breathe. Just give in. Good girl! Yes darling, that’s it! Breathe! Just breathe in.” he crooned into her ear, one hand sliding right between her breasts to feel the surge of her chest rise and fall.  She was no longer in control and she was losing consciousness. She yielded herself to him, no longer caring as his two fingers nestled into her carotid pulse.

He slid his other hand behind her neck and tilted her head back hard so there was no obstruction between her lungs and the poison. She breathed in even deeper. “That’s right breathe in. Take the gas into your lungs. Let it stop your beating heart Septima.” He smiled and willed her to arrest.

That’s when she stopped breathing. The doctor put a hand quietly over her neck where her carotid sat wide open and slid two fingers in the groove of her muscles pressing into her artery. A shudder went through him, but he stuffed it back. He had a job to do. He sat there feeling her heart slow, awaiting her arrest.

“Yes darling yes you’re in respiratory arrest. You’re gonna fall into cardiac arrest. Soon. So soon. Yes I feel it …and then I will resuscitate you. I’m going to pump your chest hard, breathe into your mouth, shock your heart to bring you back to life.” he paused, his hands both occupied. The one hand steady on the pulsing in her neck, the other went from between her now still breasts to rubbing her nipples. Each minute her heart continued to slow into certain death with him waiting, watching. The heart monitor rhythm finally changed. “That’s it. Just give into it sweetheart. Just give in. Let your heart stop.” He said tenderly as her heart slammed still against her ribs.

[bunnies4steven]

Hellooo can I request a fic?

Steven Grant has a bimbo girlfriend who is so fascinated by Steven and how smart he is and gets happy when she gets something right, like when Steven says “good job” or “my smart girl” or “good girl,” making the reader all smiley and happy, giving Steven an ego boost, and making him all dom towards her. Maybe it's a smut where he overstimulates her?

Steven Grant x AFAB!Bimbo reader

╰┈➤ WARNINGS : NSFW, SMUT, UNPROTECTED SEX, SPANK, P IN V SEX, SMALL ORAL M RECIEVING, FINGERING, OVERSTIMULATION PET NAMES (SWEET GIRL, PRETTY, LOVE, PRETTY GIRL, PRINCESS), PRAISING KINK, ROUGH SEX, BIMBO READER, MDNI.

𓆩⚝𓆪 caution: this fic contains themes of sexual activity. if these things trigger you I advise you to not read this and click off.

If there was one thing that Steven loved about you it was your simplicity. You didn’t have many thoughts running through your head like the average person. The only thing you thought about was fashion, makeup, and your stevie. There were so many perks of having you as a girlfriend. Like, how you always chose to wear the tightest and skimpiest clothes and how adorably naive you were to how other men looked at you. When Steven first met you he tried his hardest to be the respectful man he was but when you weren’t looking he couldn’t help but stare at your plump ass under that mini skirt. Or, his fetish for how you caked yourself with makeup, which always ended up looking flawless, and how he would ruin your makeup. His favorite look on you is the mascara stains on your face as he fucked your pretty throat. He loved how when he fucked you from behind he would pull your hair back and watch your face be coated in mascara stains and your lip stick smudged. But, his favorite thing was how you looked at him. You thought Steven was a genius, and while yes he is a smart man he isn’t no Nikolas Tesla.  Every little thing that Steven did fascinated you. He could just be washing his clothes and you would stare at him in awe with your pretty doe eyes. 

You, his sweet little bimbo, gave Steven a confidence boost no one else has before. So here you were on his lap as you both read an Egyptian mythology book. When you read anything you struggle to sound it out like the class clown who was forced to read in front of the class during popcorn reading. Gosh, you really were stupid. “Aaaanuuuubis i-is t-the gooood of death?” You sounded out, Steven could only just smile and respond to you with “That’s good love. Remember confidence is key. Don’t question yourself when reading.” As you kept reading Steven gently lifted your skirt up. You weren’t wearing any panties, such a naughty little girl for him. You then asked “Stevie, what are you doing?” He then assured you, “Shhh, pretty girl, just go back to reading.” You obediently kept reading and as you read Steven’s fingers found his way to your folds. He felt your dripping wetness and he smirked. Steven gently started rubbing your sensitive bud which made you whimper, “Mmm! Stevie!” Steven then cooed at you “Keep reading for me baby. You're doing such a good job, good girl.” When he praised you your cheeks flushed. You loved when your stevie praised you for being the good girl you were. You then continued reading “A-Anubis is the g-god of death and protector of graaaves. He g-guuiidesss people to the u-underwoooorld.” Steven’s two fingers then entered your pussy which made you squeak. He pumped his fingers inside and out your pussy. His breathing got faster as he felt your tight walls grip on to his fingers which each thrust. Steven praised you, “Such a smart little girl readin’ for me while she is gettin finger fucked, innit?” You nodded and moaned. You stopped reading from how good you were feeling. His fingers curled in your wet pussy as he teased “Well don’t stop now, princess keep reading for me.” You kept reading for him just like the good little girl. You were getting closer to your orgasm. You felt your core getting warmer and your breathing getting faster. You then moaned “I’m c-cumming. Stevie m’ gonna cum!” “Cum for me princess, be a good girl and cum for me.” Steven encouraged. Your legs then trembled and you squealed. — Now here you were bouncing on Steven’s cock as you desperately tried to read the paragraph from the textbook. You have already orgasmed six times tonight. Your makeup was ruined and your mascara was running down your face. Steven hand’s gripped your ass cheeks as he sucked on your nipples as you bounced on his cock. You could barely speak and your moans filled the room. “Keep readin’ for me honey.” Steven cooed. “Mmmph! C-Can’t s’ sooo hard! Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You babbled. The feeling of bouncing on his cock and feeling his thick cum and juices inside of her and on his cock made her mind fuzzy. She couldn’t read properly or think properly. “You can do it sweet girl, do it for me, be my smart girl.” Steven encouraged you. There it was his encouragement. You would’ve done anything to make your steven happy.. You then read from the book as best as you could “R-Rahhh mmm! Rah is t-the g-god of- mmph! Rah is the g-goooood of s-suuuun!” You squealed. “Good fuckin’ girl!” Steven growled before he smacked your ass. Steven was coming close to his another orgasm. His breathing got faster and he threw his head back on the couch. He felt his cock twitch as he moaned, “M’ gonna cum again, love. I want you to cum for me again, princess. Rub that little clit for me, honey.” Steven moaned and you then whined “I c-can’t cum anymore s’ too much!” “Do it for me, be my lovely girl, and do it for me.” Steven groaned before his thick cum filled your tummy. Your fingers then found your clit and you rubbed it in circles. You then screamed in pleasure, “M’ cummin!” 

[idyat]

MADNESS COMBAT 12 SPOILERS

I need to talk about it so bad I need

Can we talk about how the AAHW popped OFF in this episode? Obviously the half-MAGs are fucking awesome and it makes me wonder about what could a full MAG could do if the smaller versions are already this brutal and dangerous and determined

-Side note: THE WAY THEY COMMUNICATED WITH EACHOTHER ABOUT BREAKING SANFORD IN HALF IS ZHXZ8YG9ZII Z THAT WAS THE BEEEST-

But like, the absolute FEELINGS in the 1337 agents?! On of them was SCARED, RAN AWAY AND SLOPPILY THREW HIS WEAPON AND ANOTHER WRITHED IN PAIN IT'S SO COOL THAT WE ARE SEEING EMOTIONS FROM THEM (plus the HELP written on the ground can count). And the combat prowess of the soldats??? The NOISES made by the engineer in the beginning GOD I hope we get more of those noises (sadly we don't get much of the engineers but shoutout for being the number one display of a half-MAGs violence and lack of care for their coworker)

I'm also curious on why the Auditor went after Sanford instead of taking care of Hank directly? It seems like Hank has died, and he seemed pretty angry at Sanford, so maybe he wanted to make him stop meddling himself. Or, theorizing off of what Doc's screen said, Hank is currently somewhere not even the Auditor could reach.

Either way, I'm excited to see a stand off between Audi and 2B

"Gamer: Off"

Sanford facial expressions

Sanford facial expressions

SANFORD FACIAL EXPRESSIONS

My boy is wild even when blinded he makes me question if he actually went blind because he's that good at fighting and at raging DID YOU SEE THE SLOW-MO ON IF KILLING AND RIPPING IN TWO (heh, ironic) THE HALF-MAG GOOOODNESS

I already talked about the car scene but my hype was at its fucking HIGHEST when I saw that pinky light up. Good job Krinkels, you know how to make your viewers go insane

PLEASE THE PANIC IN DEIMOS' MOVEMENTS THE WAY HE WAS SO FAST IN RETRIEVING THE WATCHAMACALLITS THE WAY HE LOOKED BACK

[mentatemulator]

Girl whose cock is functionally an anti-material rifle.

A prompt from our writer's discord.

“Nnf... fuck, baby, right there.”

“Yeah? You like that, babygirl?”

“Mmm, yeah...”

“That's good. Focus now, where's our objective?”

“I don't... hah, god, not on my neck, I'll fire!”

“Focus! Switch to infrared.”

“I see... I see it... t-t-target acquired.”

“Gooood girl.”

“Hooouuh fuck, how many fingers is that?!”

“Get a solid lock now, sugar.”

“Yessss... lock confirmed, please, fuck, let me fire!”

“Go on, babygirl, fire for me.”

“Fuck me fuck me fuck me hahhh!”

BWOOM

“Good effect on target. Good job, hon.”

“Th-thank you.”

“Target objective is disabled, but not destroyed. I think you got another one in you, babygirl.”

“Hhhh god...”