#gonna try not to be TOO sappy on main lol

[justanotherjaydrawing]

Me and my bestie (@spiritaeliawolf) hit 20 years of friendship this year, drew this to celebrate

Been my bestie since we were 7 years old and have been listening to me rant about things endlessly for far too long. Thanks for keeping me sane over all these years~

here's to another 20 years of dumb jokes, ridiculous theories and looking out for each other in this fucked up world we live in

[preeningpisces]

Geto NSFW Headcanons

Im gonna try not to be biased because this is my main bitch right here 🖤

Lemme know if you want me to elaborate or write about any of these headcanons

(literally any ask about Geto will make me do somersaults—backflips, even)

18+ content below the cut, mdni, implied chubby f!reader

Pre-Incident

꩜ Geto is interesting because before he snaps and after he snaps feel like two different vibes in regards to sex

꩜ Doting, almost like a service-dom. He likes taking care of you, but he also prefers to have control. Though not so controlling that he can’t ever be submissive

꩜ Major smooth-talker, like Gojo said, he has a silver tongue. Likes a mixture of praise and degradation. The degradation is usually teasing, and doesn’t extend past the usual slut, whore, etc. range…usually

꩜ Sometimes it comes out corny tho lmfao pls roast him when it does

꩜ Good at making you feel sexy. The type that will kiss you all over, giving extra affection to areas you aren’t as fond of. It’s difficult at first, but with time you become more comfortable

꩜ Very sensual, and intimate. He has good self-control, & is very patient so he can draw things out & drive you crazy. Like he can spend all-too-long just toying with your mouth, denying you the kiss you so desperately want. Barely brushing your lips and teeth with his thumb, before pinching your tongue between fingers. Wowee

꩜ Refuses to kiss you after absorbing curses. Even though no one else can taste them, the thought of tasting like that is enough for for him to refuse; he doesn’t want you to go through it too. Also, tasting shit-vomit in your mouth doesn’t exactly get the schlong schlinging, yknow

꩜ I suspect absorbing curses gives him an immediate surge of negative emotions, so he usually needs space. Sometimes he just wants to hold you, or be held, in silence

꩜ Can be surprisingly playful in bed

꩜ Really likes fucking you from below. Smooshing your soft breasts and stomach against him, and feeling your weight on top of him. Holding you still so he can rail you while whispering sappy, dirty shit in your ear. I’m passing out someone help

꩜ I’ve been poisoned by the perv!geto fics on here, and can’t see him as not being a secret pervert. Just slightly. It takes a while for him to reveal that side to you, since he tries to appear refined and respectable

꩜ Definitely the type that likes music in the background; I see him as someone who cares about music a lot in general. You know he likes you if he’s sharing song recs

꩜ Lots of playlists, and even has a few sex playlists with different moods. Usually prefers things that are chill, but has a few harder-hitting songs—this is why he needs the playlists, lol. He doesn’t like when the vibe changes too much

꩜ One time you sneak Cbat onto his playlist & make him laugh so much he loses his boner. At that point did you really win? Hmm?

꩜ Tbh he’s got game & is aware of it. You gotta humble him occasionally or else he becomes insufferable

Post-Incident

꩜ This Geto is a lot more self-centered, aggressive, and sadistic in bed. I wouldn’t say he’s a tyrant tho

꩜ Will legit punish you when you disobey, no funishments here. Big into humiliation

꩜ My heart is telling me shibari, especially the kind that can be hidden beneath clothes. Particular about the color, and will pick ones that flatter your skin tone. Obsessed with the way the ropes pinch and dig into your soft body. He’ll bite and squeeze the parts that spill over the ropes

꩜ One punishment would be walking around secretly tied up, but the style where one of the ropes rubs against your pussy as you walk. It sounds nice at first, but that bitch is gonna chafe for sure

꩜ He’s more selfish than before, yes, but he still maintains a proclivity for doting—we all see how he spoils his daughters! It’s like, he gets his turn first, and when it’s your turn, it's your turn. Multiple orgasm king. He’ll do it until you’re sobbing tho, so pray for your pussy

꩜ Loves making you choke on his cock—gets kind of intense with the bjs. Mfer needs to chill (and buy you some throat lozenges)

꩜ Doggystyle is his favorite without a doubt, he just wants to pin your face to the bed and watch your ass bounce

꩜ A lot of the previous stuff is still applicable to some degree, but I think he has a lot less patience at this point, and is waaaay more into degradation & domination

꩜ He gets legitimately mean sometimes lmfao it’s like you gotta have 2 safewords: one for physical intensity level, and the other for bullying level 😭

꩜ Would he sleep with a non-sorcerer? Honestly, I can’t decide. If he did tho, he would be SO FUCKING MEAN I don’t even want to think about it !!!

꩜ Does he use monkey in bed unironically?? Chat pls advise

[residentevilbrews]

Does Terisha have a crush on Jaiden???? I heard he's pretty bad with the ladies. If she does, why????

SOO YOU READ THE LATEST ONE SHOT HUH?

I'm gonna explain why she gets so flustered and easily taken aback. (I just love rambling ok? Lol )

So, Terisha isn't that great with men. Like, she's bad. She goes to speed dating events during her S.T.A.R.S days, she lets her mom pair her up with her friends sons, basically the woman is trying. But no bites. Mostly due to her being 'too much.' Or talking about kids too soon, or it's how she's not easily giving towards the guys needs. *COUGHS* She's not letting them sleep with her. *COUGHS*

She doesn't get flirted with a lot due to how she holds herself at work and that transitions to her off hours. Due to her profession involved in law enforcement later on government. She isn't exactly approachable to some.

She's also used to being the friend every wingman friend has to talk with so their friends can get with her friends or sisters. Sooo she's used to not being the main attraction and given attention. She doesn't realize how much she'd like that feeling.

She's also used to everyone else's happiness before her own. In high school of her senior year, she realized her and her younger sister Myrtle (by a year) have the same crush, and basically pushed her crush to dance with Myrtle at a prom. Locking the two into a relationship eventually becoming high school sweethearts to later a happy married couple.

Sorry for that lengthy sappy story, uh let's move on....

Now, does she have a crush on Jaiden?

It is a crush. (She's totally feeling him @feng-shui71 xD) She can't say anything about it due to a few reasons.

During her S.T.A.R.S days, she ain't saying shit about it. Mostly due to how her co-workers behave. She doesn't want to deal with the jokes or how "low" her standards are for her interest in men.

Her mother. She's already dealing with the almost weekly calls asking about "when are you gonna get a husband? I want some grandbabies." So she's conflicted about moving forward at all with any of her relationships or crushes. On one hand, she does want to just move ahead and get married and have kids. But on the other, she is worried her mother will judge her choice in who she picks. As well as her older sister and younger sisters (she's got 3 in total who are already married/divorced/with a partner of some kind of non marriage relationship.)

Accepted her fate as a single woman. She's not running into anything out of fear and anxiety. Yeah, she can help you with your relationship problems. Her own? Nope, she's running away from them because she isn't sure how to deal with them.

Hopefully that answers that...oh, why does she have a crush on Jaiden? I'll clarify.

She does find him attractive. When he's serious, she most likely eats that up. "Like damn, he's actually being serious and focused--oh no, now he's fooling around again, never mind. I take it back." Lol

Of course, that does get frustrating to deal with when he's flirting with Jill or the secretary. She'll just tell herself, it's a stupid workplace crush and it's nothing serious. Kind of like school crushes. It sometimes helps.

She probably wouldn't advance her feelings since again, she doesn't wish to make her friendships awkward with the others by suddenly trying to go out with Jaiden, and especially when he's clearly focused on Jill and other women. So she'd probably toss her feelings out the window and focus on her job like she normally does.

Pfftt, she'd probably end up telling him about her crush on him around prior to RE8 (cause at that point hes matured enough lol) while having drinks with the gang or maybe the two are at bingo and as a joke Terisha's like: "Hey if you had played your cards right back in S.T.A.R.S. I would've agreed to go out with you on a date."

Anywhos, I appreciate the ask, cause I love rambling. X3

[scarlet--wiccan]

I’m still meh about marvel. I believe that teddy and billy are still underdeveloped characters that are being used as a golden ticket for Disney. I feel like they’ve both ‘lost’ traits about their personalities and are very attached to each other, this is being used in a devious way imo… also they’re comics biggest lgbtq+ couple yet it doesn’t seem like it, more tokenised. Forever stuck together in infinity comics. I wish the best for them, I do for the whole maguns family but I can’t help but be sick of the way marvel treats them. Like also tommy, I think luna has more appearances than him lol. There’s so many cool things they could do but don’t, explore dynamics, re write retcons exc.

I mean you’d think billy would be really mentally unwell fighting these wars in space. Plus the identity issues both the twins would have. Marvel could do so much yet decide not too. I just feel melancholy when it comes to billy and teddy these days. I feel like it’s gonna get worse, especially since the mcu is trying to adapt ‘billy’ but in the most horrific way. I’d love to hear allan heinbergs thoughts on that lol. But yeah I don’t mean to be sappy, I just feel meh when I think of the missed opportunities and the way disney/marvel is treating them. bland in its nature.

While Billy and Teddy have never reached A-list status, I wouldn't say they've been underutilized. They are the only characters, along with Kate and America, to succeed as breakouts from Young Avengers, and they were consistently employed by Al Ewing for, like, six years, with an actual continuous storyline that spanned multiple titles and a major event. That doesn't happen for many characters, and I'm sorry, but that's not tokenizing to me. They had a really strong arc and were written by multiple authentic voices. They have been more out of the spotlight lately, but they're also coming back soon in Guardians. I'm not saying you shouldn't be critical, but I'm honestly grateful that the 2010s worked out as well as they did, and I try to remember that until very recently, championing LGBT characters was an uphill battle at Marvel. In many cases, it still is.

Of course I want to see more of them, and of course I want there to be more follow-through on the implications of the Kree-Skrull Alliance. I loved Empyre and there's really not much I would change about that story, but it created a lot of loose ends and open questions that haven't been resolved yet, and that is frustrating. That's kind of the theme of the last couple years, though-- my main frustrations with Krakoa are very similar.

Regarding Billy's mental health, I'd rather see him demonstrate growth and healing than continue being defined by his depression, and to their credit, Ewing and Oliveira illustrated that pretty clearly on multiple occasions. We know that Billy still experiences these challenges, but we also know that he's better equipped to work through those challenges than he was in CC or YA-- and that resilience translates literally into more powerful magic.

I feel similarly about Wanda, and in both cases, it's a fine line to tread. You want to show hopeful futures, but you don't want to diminish the reality of the situation-- and in Wanda's case, the desire to repair her character from ableist, sexist writing can make it difficult to linger on her mental health. Ideally, there would be more time and space to show these characters going to therapy or putting in the daily effort of recovery, but unfortunately, that's not the sort of thing that gets prioritized in limited pages.

[manofmanymons]

What are some survive rarepairs you enjoy? Any dynamics you'd ever wanna explore in a shipping sense that you havent?

Uuuuh the main one was Ryo and Minoru but there are two others that I can say I don't necessarily ship (like I'm not actively playing the game and going "these two should kith maybe") but do think could be cute together

The first one is Saki and Miu, maybe not now, but when they're a little older. I like the idea of them post-game letting loose and doing all the things they were never able to before together and just growing closer and closer over time. I feel like they both have a similar quality of simultaneously being very blunt while also being afraid of being themselves too much, and they just kinda,,,get each other. They find each other's flaws endearing; it makes them feel better about their own hang ups. They could look at each other's ugliest sides and still smile and say "I think you're beautiful," and it helps them realize that "yeah, you're right, I am."

They would be super adventurous, going around trying everything from the latest food craze, to escape rooms, to camping, to just anything that catches their interest. They love to explore the world together. I also just like their opposing aesthetics. Cute n creepy. Opposites attract on the surface but actually they have a lot in common <3

They're both pretty perceptive also, so I think they'd both totally notice it if the other was feeling down and go out of their way to do something nice. Saki is good at telling exactly what's bugging Miu and how to fix it. Miu is a little worse at figuring out what'll make Saki happy (but in her defense, Saki is a little more fickle about what will and won't cheer her up), so instead she'll just ask "how can I help" and refuse to take "it's fine" for an answer.

Also think they'd play games and binge shows together. When they can't go outside, they'll just get lost in fantasy instead.

Plus you can't tell me it wouldn't be hilarious if like,,,

Miu, age 11: lol Kaito gay what a loser

Miu, age 13, realizing she has a crush on the girl bestie: oh no

The other is Ryo and Kaito. I just like their vibes. I like them being happy spending time quietly together.

Ryo's still kind of a crybaby, but Kaito's surprisingly nice about it. Whatever it is he's whining about this time, he'll help him with it no questions asked. Kaito's still kind of a ✨fucking idiot ✨, just constantly hurting himself in some way or another + he's completely helpless in the kitchen, so now it's Ryo's turn to help him. Basically, they're just really good at taking care of each other!

Total enablers, the both of them. If one of them picks a fight, the other will NOT try to calm them down. If anything, they're more like

Except instead of a flower it'd be like "hold my earring"/"hold my kunemon"

Like Minoru's pretty bad too but I feel like the odds of him successfully talking their way out of it if Ryo picked a fight are pretty high. Kaito literally would not even try. "Let's talk about this" is a thought that would never cross his mind for a second. If Ryo wants someone to get punched in the face, someone is getting punched in the face; it's just a question of which one of them is gonna do it first.

Also the kinda couple that wouldn't even look like they're dating in public but are secretly kinda really sappy in private. Lotta leaning against each other and falling asleep on top of each other.

Ryo's a little extremely irritated that Kaito's taller than him even though he's younger. If they're hanging out at home, Ryo keeps making Kaito sit down so he gets to look down at him while they're talking for a change. Half the time he won't kiss him unless he's sitting down either. Kaito thinks it's stupid but goes along with it anyways. It's not his fault if Ryo's kinda cute when he's got that stupid smug smile on his face.

Now that I'm thinking about it, I remember Takuma mentioning that he thought Kaito looked older than he is at first, and I don't think Miu or Kaito ever actually said out loud to everyone else how old they are or what grades they're in...So now I'm thinking it would be really fuckin funny if Ryo thought Kaito was the same age/older than him at first and was devastated to find out he's 14 ladfjak

Lol get pranked this was secretly me talking about Shinonome sibs AGAIN

[tiredassmage]

back at it again at the krispy kreme. I, unsurprisingly, caught "miss my boy [the fictional guy that lives in my head 24/7]" disease again, so I went back to [we've lost count of which playthru I'm on] and I think. Tyr and Kaliyo are just kinda neat. So I'm gonna subject everyone to chewing on it on main, lol.

There's elements of them that maybe shouldn't work out, but in the end, I find them so damn interesting because despite appearances on the surface, something about them works out for one another. They have their differences, but in the long-run, they find some kind of... understanding, I suppose I'd call it?

And neither of them will usually really say it directly - Tyr is used to having to veil his feelings between the lines and Kaliyo would at least feign some repulsed feelings about getting too damn sappy, in turn - but that's... really valuable to them, especially later on.

Now, I think it'd be fair to say that there's a part of him that isn't exactly thrilled Keeper suggests her as an asset on Hutta, and he's not particularly convinced she's worth the risk long-term, but his respect for Keeper trumps his personal hesitations. He sees what Keeper's getting at: she has some sort of potential value, and Intelligence isn't in the business of being wasteful of potential resources.

They very quickly establish some sort of quick impressions that aren't the most flattering. She says she's bound to learn something about him at Fa'athra's palace (and, to be frank, she does - and she's not even wrong) and Kaliyo does leave herself open to Tyr's tactical assessment after they leave Hutta that does leave him bluntly telling her he thinks she's the type to get herself killed if the job doesn't do it first.

So they're by no means fast friends. But they see use for each other. I don't think there's ever a time where he's convinced or entirely oblivious to the likelihood of Kaliyo using her new relationship with Imperial Intelligence to make herself funds or what have you on the side, as comes up later in her companion quests. But I'll also say he does discourage Lokin from meddling too deeply with the crew's affairs. Which I suppose sort of jumps around on the idea of there being any trust between these two, but if you can stick with me, I'm... trying to paint a broad picture. Hopefully.

I think... what Tyr finds is that, at face value, she's "unpredictable." It's easy to write her off as such. Easy to write her off as arrogant and self-interested. There are times where she is these things, but... there's something to be said for the fact that Kaliyo... never tries (successfully, at any rate) to sell him on the idea that she's anything but that. She tries a game a time or two, sure, but Tyr never plays into it as far as her exes. I think what happens is more that they realize the other's sort of... core values. And it's not about convincing the other that they should change, so... he entertains her big talks about taking the galaxy by storm at times. And slips in the bites that keep them honest: when is he going to be on her list of ex-partners that have too much baggage?

And I think what it is is that... out of that... weird flavor of honesty about who they are in their working relationship comes something that can be labeled trust, between them. Tyr's not afraid to tell her when he disagrees with her, but at the end of the day, they'd show up for each other because it's, generally, mutually beneficial. And I think, by the end of the class story, they'd do it even if it didn't exactly net them clear benefits.

Tyr certainly would because Tyr ends up trusting her, in their weird kind of roundabout way. It's not a trust like he has with Vector, or Shara, or later Theron. It's not trust in the warm, we trade our hearts openly and freely between us sort of sense. But it's trust in the sense that I know what to expect when I deal with you. In what I suppose you could really only call ironic, her "unpredictability" is what makes her predictable and reliable to him.

And I think... it is very telling, what she learns of him at Fa'athra's: that he isn't reckless. He has a conscious that will affect his decisions on the job in the kind of work that generally isn't too forgiving to that kind of disposition. Something that generally makes her inclined to scoff at him a bit for being soft. And then he proves consistent throughout their time working together in the fact that Tyr shows up for the people he brings into his circle.

Kaliyo is one of those people, despite the areas where they disagree. And sometimes they clash. Tyr's a brand of loyal that maybe isn't surface-level compatible with her. She's thought him foolish for his loyalty to the Empire, and maybe even more of a fool when I think she figured out his loyalty wasn't, exactly, to the Empire as a whole, but to his masters, to Imperial Intelligence. That his sense of ideals and morals is stronger than a paper-level patriotism he claims brought him to enlisting with Intelligence.

It's foolish. It's soft. It's gonna get him killed one day. They bark about what goes down when they return to Hutta. He means it when he says he can't tolerate her working against what he's given his life to. He doesn't directly say they're talking about Imperial Intelligence's reputation, specifically, but she knows enough about him by then, I think, to know that's what he's really bothered about. He's not some young, bootlicking spaceport officer fishing for a promotion. As fuckin' foolish as it is, he's got his heart and soul behind what he does.

And he genuinely asks her why? Why pick a side? Why'd she pick him? I don't think they get a clear answer in the conversation.

But I do think they both already know the answer. Because for whatever else they are, they've stuck with each other this long. It's not purely transactional at this point. Yes, there's... still probably something mutually beneficial about tolerating each other still going forward, but.

Look, neither of them probably exactly use the word "friend" to each other's face. At least not a lot. They bicker. But I think, at the end of the day, they're two people that have very few people that do see them for who they are, really, and have actually stuck around. For better or worse, they stick.

And he'll... defend that decision, ultimately. When she gets caught up in all that transpires as Intelligence is torn down around them, he simply tells her to look for her opening, and do what she does best. Because grand declarations of devotion don't do it for her. That's not their relationship. She's self-reliant and she'll do what she thinks is best... largely regardless of what Tyr's input is. (Except him understanding and accepting that is why he has any clout to argue with her about morality at all. This is important later in KOTXX.)

And KOTXX is... not what I ever expected to be The Clearest Show of their kind of relationship, but I did clip together that video of one run through Anarchy in Paradise because it... is a really good show of how they get along. Why they work for each other.

Kaliyo was never going to be the type to be the first one looking for him if he disappeared, or sticking through a long search. And that's... just fine. Tyr never would've expected her to. Frankly, she probably does understand that a part of him was just... waiting for that kind of day. That he ended up surviving taking a blaster to a semi-immortal planet-consuming Force-entity is... Well, no one was betting on that, yeah?

Tyr, I think, is one of the only characters I've gotten that far into KOTXX that has felt he's got any ground to argue with her on - because he has experience with her priorities, and how she thinks. Sort of... natural when you work with someone that long, right? So, he knows how she operates, he knows how to reason with her, knows what she needs to be offered to take an opportunity. And, in the end, there's that...

"Agent?"

"Yes?"

"I'm glad you're alive."

Which... I think is where I'll wrap because I feel like I just sort of keep repeating the same point, which boils down to... they took an assessment of each other's motivations and... accepted that about each other. I'd even probably say Tyr would never expect her to defend him, to show up without at least some sort of token protest about compensation and what's it worth to her, but I also think, for all of Kaliyo's eyerolling about him, it's exactly that kind of stubborn candle-burning attitude about him that keeps her around, at times. Something... authentic in them both amidst a profession built on masks, deceit, and betrayal.

It's not even quite "someone's gotta make sure you don't get yourself killed, agent" as it is more likely she'd poke that at least being around when it happens would maybe be interesting or entertaining. It's a kind of friendship where they'd still say they'd sell each other to satan for a corn chip.

Except Tyr never would. And, sure, Kaliyo essentially tried. And it didn't work out. So it's just a lot of work for probably little payoff to try again.

So, in the end... Friends? Yeah... Sort of. She's not writing any speeches for a funeral or anything, but she'd maybe have a drink for him. Tyr's the one for remarks about deserving better, or whatever sentimental crap he fills his head with when he's waiting on sniper shots to line up. (And it just... sorta works.)

[drleggman]

lexi!!!!

1. i love you and miss you whenever you’re gone <3

2. what are your main self ships? and can you give me a tiny glimpse of each of the relationship dynamics?

Kae 🥹 ilyilyilyily

My top self ships are probs me/bokuto, me/reiner, and me/tamaki (i got so excited when i saw u and aleks talking about him yesterday! he’s so underrated) !! They’re all like my og self ships too and I’ve kept our lore stored away for years atp, so I’ll talk about them!

Bokuto!! He’s like the stereotypical golden retriever boy, and that’s usually not my type but… Here we are lol. We’re very complementary, he’s the sun to my moon etc etc. We met when I was hired on to be a translator for the jpn national team, and he asked me out after the Olympics were over. He just. Approached me and said “You’re pretty :D I think it’s so cool that you speak two languages :D I wasn’t gonna ask you out bc I thought it’d be unprofessional, but then tsum-tsum called me a pussy, and I’m not a pussy, and” I have to cut him off and we agree to go on a date and hit it off immediately! We both tend to get pouty when something doesn’t go our way and we love to baby each other when it happens. He encourages me to do things I’d usually be to nervous to try, and I encourage him to rest lol. He introduces me to his friends and invites me to hang out with him and the boys on the national team and brings me out of my shell. Our friends think we’re annoying bc of how sappy and affectionate we are. Especially if we’ve been drinking! Just hanging off of each other constantly and arguing about who loves the other more. We never leave the honeymoon phase and spend our whole lives after getting together absolutely obsessed with each other.

Reiner and I, in both a canon and modern setting, kinda trauma bond and become inseparable (boys w mommy issues love me and I love men who cry and are so miserable). We both are in the middle of identity crises and struggle with our sense of self and our place in the world and how to cope with the horrors we’ve partaken in lived through, but we make each other feel so seen in a way we’ve never experienced before. The people in our lives want to tell us that maybe we shouldn’t be in a relationship while still in such vulnerable mental states, but they’ve also not seen us so happy in so long, so they keep their mouths shut. We’re a bit toxic at first in a codependent way. We can’t function without the other and we fuel each others grief and isolate ourselves from the people around us, but after years together, we slowly start to get over ourselves lmao. We grow tired of pitying ourselves and start to be better together, and we both firmly believe we’d have never snapped out of it if it weren’t for us encouraging each other. Which maybe isn’t true, but nobody would ever tell us that.

And Tamaki!! My sweet Suneater <3 This is one of the rare instances in which I initiate everything in the relationship and take on a more dominant role. I was just like him when we met, but if there’s one thing that will snap me out of my anxiety, it’s seeing someone who is just as anxious as me struggling to do things it helps that I think he’s so cute. We meet at Fatgum’s agency, and I wanna be his friend soooo bad, but I know how overwhelmed he gets, so I go slow and am very soft with him. I tell him about how I manage my anxiety, teach him my coping mechanisms, and show him my fidget toys and then buy him some of his own - all unprompted. He was kinda unresponsive at first bc he was confused about why I’d wanna talk to him, but he warms up to me pretty quickly after he realizes that I have the same struggles as him. He starts to see through the false confidence after that, catching me when I’m anxious and picking up on my ticks, and he’ll remind me of the techniques I taught him to help him get out of his head. I’m the “he asked for no pickles” partner, while he’s clutching my shirt and hiding behind me w his face pressed into my shoulder. If he sees me getting anxious, especially when talking to someone, he also gets nervous lol but his need to help me emboldens him. His favorite move is to just like physically insert himself into the situation. Like stand between me and the person and whisk me away to somewhere quiet. I’m much cockier when we’re alone, and I love to tease him and get him all flustered. He loves praise but it gets him so worked up and I looove to shower him with compliments and pet names. I’m one of the few people he lets his guard down around when he’s not in action mode, so he’s just like. Normal when we’re alone. Still soft spoken and sweet, but after being together for a while, his relationship anxiety and worries about looking dumb in front of me fade. anxiety4anxiety all the way but we make it work

[ok-noveil]

Question re your OC, Knave! What were your sources of inspiration? i.e. were there any cultures, fashions, time periods, etc. you looked to in particular? Anything that you scrapped from earlier designs? Something that became more prominent than you first thought it did?

Also what's Knave's favourite food and a funny (maybe rarely spoken) fact about them? :D

Hello! For my inspiration, I mainly used the TS LIs, like the parts of their clothes, colors, items on their clothes/sprites, et. I didn't particularly use any cultures, fashion, or time period, or if I did, it's based on whatever cultures, fashion, and time periods that the LIs designs are derived from. For instance, all of them have some sort of harness or straps, so I wanted to include them on Knave. I'm a pintrest warrior so I have tons of boards of clothes and fantasy designs, so when I was struggling with the torso, I went to pintrest.

I have tons of sketches that I scrapped, either because I didn't have the skills to do much back then (year or two ago) or because I wanted to brainstorm for more ideas. I already had a design in mind as my first idea, but in the end, I had several alternate designs that I never expanded on...

This one with all the cloth was one of my favorites but I knew I wasn't gonna draw all of it over and over again. I'll keep it around for an alternare design for a oracle MC version maybe. I really wanted to go for an Alchemist vibe since my main MC has the Alchemist backstory.

Something that became more prominent was his cloak design. Initially, I didn't have a clue what to do with it without it looking too similar to Mhin's cloak (Their design is so simple and clean, but still just so perfect.) They're both wearing cloaks, so I was trying to put something together that was different but also satisfying and wouldn't give me a headache to draw over and over again. So basically, I stole from another visual novel MC/OC of mine lol. But even so, I found a reference for the idea afterwards. I think it fits Knave more than this guy (Knox).

Okay! Fun stuff! Knave's favorite food is spicy noodles, preferrably with chopped green onions and boiled egg, but anything with broth and noodles makes for a warm, cozy meal for him. A funny fact about him is that he secretly has a hidden stash of sappy romance novels, the corny lovey-dovey cliche stuff. He enjoys the genre but will never admit it. A hopeless romantic deep down. 🙂‍↕️

I have that little fun fact on his character sheet that I haven't finished yet.

Thanks for the question!

:)

[septic-selfships]

Having Marvin and Valerie first kiss thoughts ^^

___

For Marvin and Valerie's main storyline I can see it being after a really high-emotion moment. Marvin is trying to untangle the secrets of the Circle and it's been eating away at him physically and mentally. Valerie manages to pull him away from his work to get him to eat, bathe, and change clothes. He gathers his thoughts enough to admit that he loves them and that he's felt this way for a while, and while Valerie figures that he isn't in his right mind, they admit that they love him too. They curl up and rest for a while, and eventually Marvin is comfortable enough to ask for a kiss. He's more desperate than he wanted to be, but they're both happy to have it off their chests. Things are gonna be messy for a while, though.

For the Babysitter AU it's a lot less dramatic lol. It's a late night and Marvin and Valerie are talking and going through some of Marvin's old things. The radio's playing and it goes to a cheesy romance song, and Marvin pulls Valerie into a dance. When the song is over, Marvin tilts their head up towards him, and Valerie asks for a kiss (stumbling over their words a bit because they're so nervous). They kiss, soft and sweet, the world feeling like it's slowed down around them.

Bonus for Sunday because I'm feeling sappy:

It's after things settle down with the Circle, everyone is hanging out at the shop and almost everyone is asleep. Everyone had something to drink besides Valerie (it's not their thing) and Sunday and Marvin and Val are still up. Sunday's the only one who knows about Marvin and Valerie, but they admit that they have some blossoming feelings about the two. Both of them admit having some feeling back, in different ways, and they promise to work it out. Sunday snuggles up close to Valerie, and they end up kissing. It'll all work out eventually!

In the Babysitter AU it's also fairly casual, they all developed feelings for each other around the same time and they've been exploring things together (though it's been more on Marvin and Valerie's side). They shuffle their cuddling order, and one night it's Sunday and Valerie on the end. Marvin's already asleep so they're talking and laughing, and as the show they're watching goes to commercial, they kiss. (After Marvin's and Valerie's kiss.)

Sorry for ranting for so long I have many thoughts.

[rehdhoodie]

WELL IF YOU MAY ASK--

ill try not to rant too much but the premise of it is that when the whole simulation starts going to shit and VIC dies (?), before ryder goes through and defeats happy and the farmer and whatever, he grabs VICs head,alot of e7's old plans, and some papers he finds laying around relating to how the simulation works and keeps them with him because he is DETERMINED to fix VIC after they get off that damn island. if e7 can give sentience to a robot, ryder knows damn well hes gonna give it to VIC back. after ryder barely escapes the island and finally gets back to mainland, he goes back to his moms house and is like "HEY!! im not dead btw!! lol!!" and his mom is like "OH MY GOD I MISSED YOU STAY WITH ME FOR A WHILE" and so he does, and in the time that he's staying with her he fixes up VIC and one day HES ALIVE AGAIN OH MY GODD!! VIC is forever grateful and they spend alot of time just talking, while ryder discovers how to build him a body. you remember that weird blue striped hologram shit from the game? (image below) yeah, ryder somehow stole the mechanics of how they made that and with some magic and hhbf logic that im not smart enough to understand, ryder basically gives VIC a holographic body!! hooray!! thats basically the main stuff, the rest is just domestic life. ryder n VIC find an apartment together, VIC tells him about e7 and ryder tells him about how the world works. VIC learns how to be (as close as possible for him to,) a human, all that sappy stuff!

TLDR: ryder saves VICs head and some blueprints when he gets off the island and fixes him up!

(id love to talk more about this au with you ((and just hhbf in general)) because i need help on it cus im stupid and also i NEEEDDD more hhbf friends PLSS)

i might be cringe. but i am free. (this is heavily au-ized so if anyone wants to hear abt my hhbf au.. heh)

[pedrito-friskito]

I’m still here - part iii - eddie munson x fem!reader

summary: moving on is easier said than done.

warnings: mostly angst lol dustin and steve and wayne make appearances, mentions of canon-typical violence, swearing, etc. no smut in this one!

a/n: yes we are veering from canon cuz the end of season four had basically everything going to shit in hawkins so I have tweaked/ignored a few things for the sake of story.

reblogged & comments always appreciated ♥️

| series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3 |

Steve knows that he cares too much.

It’s just become apart of his personality, at this point. Forever the babysitter, forever giving too much of a damn to distance himself from the hell that is Hawkins. If you had told him three, four years ago that this is where he’d end up, the pseudo older brother to a bunch of rag-tag munchkins, weirdly friendly with his ex-girlfriend and ex-crush, and deeply mourning the loss of a guy he knew for all of zero-point-five seconds, hugging his sobbing girlfriend on her front lawn, he’d tell you to go shove it.

But, that’s where he is, and where he’s been since you fell.

He remembers you, vaguely. There were a few parties he’s sure you both attended, basketball games and pep rallies. He recognizes your face from the grad photos, the class of ‘84 plastered on the wall outside the gym. If he thinks hard enough, he’s pretty sure you’ve shared classes as far back as kindergarten, plunked together often enough that you could have been fast friends if either of you had made the effort, but never had the chance.

But Eddie died. Eddie died to give them more time. Eddie died to save the world. And now here’s Steve, trying his best to comfort you when he knows there’s no way to fix this, to make this better.

Eddie died.

You dropped as soon as the words were out of Steve’s mouth, tears pouring down your cheeks. The sobs you made were completely soundless, and something about it made Steve’s heart ache harder, like a scene out of an old movie, the volume sucked away so you could only see the actor’s raw emotion. He caught you easily, reflexes kicking in at the right moment for once, and felt your hands curl in the front of his pull-over as he sank down onto the grass with you, pulling you against his chest.

“I know,” he murmurs to you, rubbing an almost-awkward hand up and down your back. “I’m so sorry.”

It was in passing, sure, Eddie’s remarks about you, but Steve noticed, could see the gleam in his eye, the excited tone in his voice whenever he mentioned you.

Walking through hell-Hawkins, trying to find a way back, talking about Nancy: “Now, I don’t know what happened between you two, but if I were you, I would get her back. Because that was an unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen.”

“Don’t you have a girlfriend?”

A sputtered laugh. “That I do. Best thing that ever happened to me, I can tell you that.”

When they had unravelled everything, Nancy announcing they needed to go back into the Upside Down: “No. No, absolutely not. Nope. No. I am not going back in there, Harrington. The only place I am going is straight to Chicago to get my girl, and then I am getting as far away from Hawkins as physically possible.”

In the midst of hot-wiring the stolen Winnebago: “Now, I swore to myself I wouldn’t wind up like he did, and I had my foot in the right direction, almost, until five days ago. In love with a pretty girl, army-crawling my way towards graduation. Y’know, I’m gonna go to Chicago with her? Do whatever I can to make her happy, all that sappy shit from the movies. I got big plans, Harrington, let me tell you. But now, I’m wanted for murder, and soon, grand theft auto. So, uh, I’m really living up to that Munson name. At least my girl still loves me.”

When Dustin had told them Eddie was gone, Steve felt…hollow. He couldn’t explain it. He barely knew the guy, though he supposed saving the world and fighting like hell through the demonic-opposite version of their hometown created a bond of some sort between them all. Eddie was the rebel, the outcast, the freak, which Steve is loathe to admit he once agreed with. Knowing the insane witch-hunt most of Hawkins has embarked upon for the guy, it makes his stomach turn.

It’s strange, but seeing you, watching you take it in, it makes him miss Eddie more. He was a good guy, there was no questioning that, and Steve wishes he’d taken the time to get to know him more.

He can’t do that, but he can do this. You both just sit there for a while, Steve starting to rock side-to-side at one point or another, his brow furrowed as you cry into his collar. He can’t fix this. He can’t make this better. But he can be there for you, on possibly the worst day of you life, try to comfort you when he’s just delivered the worst possible news.

“He really loved you,” he tells you.

You hiccup, finally lifting your head and wiping at your face. Your eyes are bloodshot now, lashes clumped together with tears. “I really loved him.”

“I have something for you, actually,” Steve says, not making a move to get up but pointing to his car parked at the curb, “and I think Dustin would really like to see you.”

You nod, chin bobbing with the movement, wiping a fresh tear from your cheek. “Okay.”

Slowly, Steve helps you to your feet, and you walk together towards the curb, you with your arms tucked against your chest, Steve toying with his hands. He pops the trunk and you wait on the pavement, knee bouncing with nerves as he retrieves the vest.

“I washed it,” he tells you, holding the denim towards you. You snatch it instantly, your eyes drifting shut as you crush it to your chest. “It was kind of…well, it’s a long story.”

“I want to know,” you say, and the strength in your voice surprises Steve. “I want to know what really happened. How he died. I want to know everything.”

Steve just stares at you a moment before closing the trunk. “It’s…a lot. You might wish the opposite if we tell you.”

You shake your head, fingers toying with the collar of Eddie’s vest. “I don’t care. I want to know. I need to, Steve. Please.”

“Okay,” he says, reaching out and putting a hand on your arm. “Let’s go.”

+

You just stare at Dustin.

He stares back.

“You’re lying.”

“Wish that I was,” the kid says, spreading his hands wide. His eyes are still a little shiny; he’d burst into tears when you and Steve had arrived at the Wheeler’s house. It was weird at first, all these faces you only knew in passing staring back at you. 

Nancy you had probably spoken to the most, both of you working on the school paper at one time or another, and when you walked into her house, she squeezed your hand and mouthed I’m sorry. Robin introduced herself with an awkward flourish, giving your shoulder a light tap with her fist before sinking back behind Steve. Mike Wheeler you’d met at Hellfire, and he looked as solemn as Dustin, a girl with short hair you didn’t recognize standing behind him. Lucas was at the hospital with Max, another member of the group who Steve told you had also been injured in the…whatever it was that had happened, and Lucas was by her side twenty-four seven.

You’d shrugged into the vest the moment you stepped out of Steve’s car. It felt right, somehow, to be wearing it, the denim soft against your skin. It smelled mostly of laundry detergent, but if you inhaled deep enough, you could swear Eddie’s scent was still lingering in the fabric, proof that it had once been his.

Dustin had been hanging at the back of the group when you walked in, the last to greet you as Steve introduced you formally to those who didn’t already know you. He was sitting at the dining table, face pushed into his hand, foot tapping nervously.

The room had fallen silent as you walked over to him, realizing as you got closer what was sitting on the table before him.

A length of chain and a guitar pick. Eddie’s.

“Hey kid,” you said quietly, and his head had snapped up, eyes going wide as he realized you were standing right in front of him. He was on his feet in an instant, arms around your middle, hands fisted in the back of the vest.

He’d babbled into your front for a while. I’m so sorry I tried to save him he bought us time he saved my life he saved everyone’s life I can’t believe he’s gone I’m sorry he’s a hero he’s my hero he didn’t run away he helped save the world.

“It’s okay,” your murmured, hugging him back tightly. “It’s okay.”

It wasn’t okay, but the sentiment remained.

Once Dustin had calmed enough to get a coherent sentence out, they sat you down, and they told you everything. Steve’s warning echoed through your mind as they explained, but you needed to know. You needed to know what Eddie died for, and, as Dustin and Mike and the girl, El, talked, you learned exactly what. Exactly what he’d done, exactly how he died, exactly how important everything he did was.

Dustin starts to cry again when he tells you the last thing Eddie said.

Tell her, okay? Tell her what I did. Tell her how much I loved her. I loved her so much, man.

You hugged Dustin again when the tears came harder, and Steve met your eyes, his brow hard, nodding once. “He loved you guys too,” you tell them, reaching over and squeezing Mike’s hand. “I know he did.”

+

Your parents take off for your grandparents the next day. You outright refuse to go, standing by the fact that you are a grown-ass woman and you do not legally have to listen to them and your friends need you. Your mother looks like she could fall over and your father just flares his nostrils before getting in the car. It’s rough, from all sides, but you don’t know what else to do. You can’t leave. Not yet. Not like this.

It takes a few days, a lot of encouragement from Steve and Robin (who you’re already strangely attached to), but you finally pluck up the courage to drive over to the trailer park to see Eddie’s uncle.

The park is a mess, toppled trees and power lines, the metal fences cleaved in half in some places. A few of the motorhomes have been relocated to other parts of the park, and everything just looks off. One of the permanent trailers has a large oak sticking through it’s roof, another is missing the glass from all its windows. There’s a string of caution tape hanging limply off one of the fence posts outside the Munson trailer. Eddie’s van is still parked out front. 

It’s late afternoon, the sun just starting to dip in the sky, and you walk slowly towards the front door, lifting your hand to knock.

“Eddie’s not here,” a familiar voice calls, and you turn to see Wayne Munson sticking his head out of the van, his face an unreadable mask. “Wondered when I’d see you around.” He slides the door of the van open all the way, sinking onto the floor and letting his feet touch the grass. “Haven’t seen him more than two weeks now. S’not like him. And now, with all this,” he gestures to the trailer, to the destruction marring the trailer park, “I ain’t never been this worried in my life.”

Dustin had explained what had happened at the trailer, that Chrissy Cunningham’s death had created one of four gates that had helped cause the bigger rift (earthquake) that had ripped through Hawkins. He and Eddie had gone through the gate to distract the bats, the demons that had ultimately killed Eddie, and the gate was still open. It explained Wayne being in the van instead of the trailer.

You can feel the tears crawling back up your throat as you walk towards Wayne. You’re still wearing the vest — you haven’t taken it off since Steve gave it to you — and you have the guitar pick necklace in your pocket, burning a hole with every step. Wayne had never been around much when you were still living in Hawkins, most of your nights at the trailer spent with just Eddie, and the mornings hushed and whispered since Wayne worked the nightshift and slept most of the day. Eddie was always respectful, careful not to make any noise when you got up in the morning.

Wayne was a nice man, if a little rough around the edges. From the few conversations you’d had with him, you knew his heart was in the right place, that he’d done the best he could taking Eddie in after everything happened with his parents, and he loved him like he was his own son.

It breaks your heart to have to tell him this.

He cries. He cries, and you cry, and you cry together, Wayne surprising you with a bone-crushing hug. You give him the easier version, well-rehearsed with Steve and Dustin, the version of the story that doesn’t let slip any more details than necessary. That Eddie saved someone’s life after the earthquake happened, but had lost his own in the process.

“Kid was always too selfless for his own good,” Wayne grumbles, his voice thick, shaking his head. “Goddamn it, Eddie.” He pats your hand. “Y’can go inside if you want. His stuff’s all there in his room. Just…watch out in the living room, I suppose.”

“Thanks, Wayne.”

He just nods.

You nearly stumble back through the door when you walk in, the gate on the ceiling more terrifying than what you’d expected. It’s not moving, like Dustin had described it, but black…vines slither outward, dark tendrils marring the white ceiling. The middle is open, an eerie red light pulsing back at you. What the fuck.

Side-stepping the living room as quickly as you can, you dart for Eddie’s bedroom, the path in the well-worn carpet leading you straight there. As soon as you’re in, you shut the door behind you, leaning your forehead against the Iron Maiden poster taped to the back of the door.

It’s a few moments before you can open your eyes, turn and face the rest of the room. It’s so familiar to you, it all is, but it doesn’t feel right without Eddie with you. Without the sloppy make-outs on his desk, the intense love-making in his bed, the endless music sessions, the books on his bedside table.

His D&D gear sits on the desk, a stack of books and papers and a pencil case, and you run your fingers over the books. There’s a battered copy of The Lord of the Rings sitting on the bed, the pages dog-eared so many times it’s hard to tell where he was in the book this time around. Milk crates full of records, cassette tapes, the vinyl of a Metallica album still on the record player.

You flip it on, setting the needle in place. The record starts to spin, guitar and drums spilling from the speakers beside the player. You walk towards his closet, hands reaching for whatever fabric you can find, pulling a hoodie with the Iron Maiden logo emblazoned on the front off the shelf, shrugging out of the vest so you can pull the hoodie on and then the vest back on top.

So close, no matter how far.

Couldn’t be much more from the heart.

Forever trusting who we are,

And nothing else matters.

Wayne is still sitting in the open van when you walk back outside, shutting the trailer door behind you. “Y’should get home, kid,” he tells you, “your parents are probably worried.”

“They left for my grandparents’ a few days ago,” you tell him, and he lifts a brow. “I couldn’t leave Hawkins. Not yet.”

He just looks at your for a long moment, and then nods.

“I’m staying with the Harrington’s this week, maybe the Buckley’s next week, but maybe I could come by sometime? For dinner or something?”

He actually cracks a smile; a sad one, but a smile all the same. “That’d be nice, kid.”

+

Once enough time has passed, they declare Eddie Munson’s cause of death as an accident related to the earthquake, and officially call off the manhunt for him. People are pissed, angry folks claiming the cops didn’t do enough, that “that Munson freak could still be on the run, killing people!” It makes you sick, the way they talk about him. You want to scream in every single one of their faces, but you know it’s no use.

The funeral is small, you and Wayne and the crew you now consider your closest friends, along with Eddie’s other pals from Corroded Coffin and Hellfire. Every single one of them — including you and Wayne — shows up wearing the Hellfire t-shirt under suit jackets or over dresses. You wear yours tucked into a black skirt, one of Eddie’s flannels over top, along with the vest. It feels right.

The headstone is dark, almost black, the words etched in grey.

Edward Munson, October 31st 1965-March 27th 1986, beloved friend, son, and soulmate.

It had been Dustin’s idea, the soulmate part. It made you cry.

Time goes on, the town returning to some semblance of normal, if you can even call it that. Everyone is still balanced on a razor’s edge, tiptoeing around each other. You call your parents regularly, once it’s safe to come back to Hawkins, but they refuse. It’s only a month until the house is put up for sale and bought by a family who lost their home in the quake. Part of you wonders if it’s your parents way of punishing you for refusing to leave, but you’re too wrapped in your grief to really care.

You defer your final exams and your third year at the university. You spend weeks couch surfing between the Wheeler’s and the Harrington’s and the Buckley’s and even the Henderson’s, before Wayne tells you to move into Eddie’s room. The gate is still there in the trailer, ominous as ever, but Wayne puts up a few pieces of plywood to block it from view, and you use the back door to get in and out of the trailer instead.

It’s nice, in a weird, awful way. You spend a lot of time with Robin and Steve and Dustin, happy to be around people who understand, who are still trying to get you to understand everything, but are patient and kind and good.

You spend a lot of time at the cemetery as well. Most days, when you’re not working at the Family Video or the gas station by the trailer park, you sit there in front of his headstone for hours. You bring a book or your Walkman and just sit, leaned against the stone, listening to his tapes or reading Lord of the Rings. You talk to him a lot too, about everything happening with your parents, with school, how great the friends you inherited from him are.

Today is a rough day. Summer’s getting closer, and any normal year, you’d be on your way home from Chicago around now. Eddie would be waiting on your front porch or come sprinting out of the trailer when you pulled down the gravel road, scooping you into his arms and kissing you hard. You’d have the whole summer to spend together, getting up to no good and spending far too much (not enough) time naked in his bed.

God fucking damn it, you miss him.

“Why’d you have to go?” you ask the stone, fingers plucking at the grass beneath you. “Why’d you have to leave me here all alone, huh? Why’d you have to go and be the hero?”

The wind whistles through the trees, sifting your hair off the back of your neck, and you can feel goosebumps rise on your skin. Something in the air changes, the temperature plummeting all of a sudden, and your stomach is in knots. Clouds roll in overhead and you squint at the sky, reaching for your bag and getting to your feet. Reaching out, you run your hand over the top of the headstone, the curves and ridges.

“Goodnight, Eds.”

“Goodnight, already? I just got here.” You whirl, bag falling out of your now-slack grip. You didn’t hear his approach, and staring at him, you’re half-convinced you’re losing your mind.

Eddie.

You just stare, open mouthed, as he walks towards you, that familiar saunter to his step as he closes the distance between you and him. There’s something…different, but you can’t put your finger on it, and you’re ninety-nine percent sure you’re going into shock, that this is some kind of vivid hallucination and you’re going to wake up any minute.

There’s a scar on his neck, you realize as he gets closer, the skin red and pink and cutting down towards one of his tattoos. He lifts a hand slowly to your cheek, and you can see more scars on his hand and arm, right in the web between his index finger and thumb, across the thin skin of his wrist.

His palm is cool against your cheek, but solid and there, thumb swiping over your skin. This isn’t a dream. Or the weed you smoked last night in the trailer was much more than you bargained for.

Eddie grins, revealing those pearly white teeth and…fangs, long and pointed canines, dipping down over his bottom teeth, perfect and sharp.

What the actual fuck.

You just stare, jaw dropping open, eyes brimming with tears. He’s here. He’s actually here. Is this actually happening? This can’t be a hallucination. You can feel him.

A single tear drips down your cheek and Eddie wipes it away, the grin splintering slightly, his own eyes going shiny. “Hi, baby,” he says, voice soft as anything. “Sorry I’m late.”

—————

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tags from other chapters (pls ignore if this is annoying!): @peterparkers-girlfriend @ruhro7 @steadyasthe-flowers @pedropascalsx @saintmurd0ck @pintsizemama @charliecoccix @mindidjarin @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @1800-fight-me @simple-lovebot @itwasthereaminuteago @quadruplescorpio @eddiesloversstuff @effinhell @indulginginmydailydoseofdepresso @dazedrhapsody @deliciousdreamlandlady @pandawithprobs @ajokeformur-ray

[bergens-adventure-tours]

Week 8: April 3rd – April 9th, 2023 // Let the solo travels begin!

Well folks, the adventures have truly and officially begun this week!  I’ve left the comfort of Hobart and the Fitzy Castle House, and am now traveling the mainland with just myself and Peg.  I’d like to start by saying whoever else has been lead to believe that Australia is always hot and sunny, I’ve got sad news for you.  I figured my timing to more or less “chase the colder weather” because I was worried of how I’d handle the Australian heat would still be giving me at least consistent sunny 15+˚C… It has not lol it’s been pretty comparable to Vancouver seasons thus far – both in Tassie and now along the south coast.  No, I shouldn’t be this surprised; geographically it all makes sense when you actually think about it… it’s just been a rude awakening knowing packing the toque was actually a smart idea and not a waste of space lol.  

--

Monday was such a benchmark day for me – I officially completed my first ever van build!  The fact that we designed, bought material, took everything out, and built the whole thing from scratch in just 5 days (realistically only have like 4-6hours at a time) is pretty fucking amazing to me.  I was just adding up the days as I thought we had done 6 or 7… I’m so impressed with how well we worked together after having never met before and SO grateful to Rhys for giving me so much of his spare time (all in the middle of moving houses too I might add).  An absolute legend!  There were a couple minor things we would’ve like to get done that we just unfortunately ran out of time for – but the overall build of the main components we wanted were completed and it looks so freaking good. Like I could not be happier with it.  And after this first week living out of it and having it organized, I feel like I can really live and breathe in this space.  It’s so nicely laid out and organized, I can’t wait to put together a proper video for you all!  After a thank you dinner for Rhys, I couldn’t get to sleep till quite late as I was FAR too excited about the van and figuring out how I wanted to organize it all.

--

Tuesday was an emotional day for me as it was time to officially move into my new home, while getting ready to say goodbye to what has been my home for the past 7 weeks.  I got an early start and spent the day putting up my lights, organizing all my gear, cleaning. The afternoon I spent sorting out some electrical stuff (big shout-out and thanks to Ethan and Lauren for your help), writing notes and getting flowers for the house + the couple who let us use their space for renovating the van.  Managed to get in one last climb late night climb with Sam+Annie before giving the house my little thank you gift.  Was really nice to have everyone home for the night, with Alissa having been gone most of the time I’ve been here.

--

Wednesday was a pretty successful and eventful day! Early start to cut my own hair, pack the last of my stuff from the house, say my goodbyes to the housemates, grab coffee w/Sam+Sammy, get some new runners to get back into running/working out while on the road (shout out to Sam for the discount!), and finally dropped off the flowers and note to Sean+Megs as a thank you for allowing Rhys and I to use their home for the van build.  Not gonna lie, I got real sappy this week…  I find I often express myself best through my writing, and was feeling a lot of gratitude for a lot of people this week.  I had many complete strangers go out of their way to help me out in some really big ways during my time here, and I can’t help but think about how different my first 2 months would’ve been had I not met Alissa back in Canada last October.

The afternoon was spent on a beautiful 4-hour drive to Devonport, where I found a nice little spot just down the road from the ferry to park for the night.  Was feeling pretty exhausted from the past week, so after organizing some food for the ferry, and blowing out my inverter trying to use my induction stove top (whoops)…I ended on an early night with some reading.

--

Ferry day was actually such a dream.  I hadn’t realized how run down I’ve been getting, so the forced RNR was very much needed.  Thanks to Sean’s advice, I went straight to deck 10 and snagged one of the only 4 couches on the ferry and set up camp.  They were surprisingly super comfortable and perfect length for me to fully stretch out and take many naps lol. Bringing a blanket, I think was my best idea.  There wasn’t much for service most of the ride, so my time was divided between napping, people watching, snacking and reading.  The 10hours flew by pretty quickly, and next thing I knew, I was looking for a place to park for the night!  Ended up in a parking lot that I didn’t realized locked at night, so had a cop knocking on my window at 23:30 telling me to park out on the street next to the park… finding free spots is going to be a bit of a learning curve I imagine haha.

--

Friday I got to experience my first Laundromat, and I gotta say, I picked a good one to start with… super clean and newer machines.  Got all my clothing and bedding washed which felt SO nice to crawl into that night.  I was back n forth a bunch between whether I begin the road trip west, or back track to Melbourne… I decided that my body still needed some rnr time, so I found myself a beach/cliff spot 20min south of Devonport, called Point Addis, and set up camp for the rest of the day to read and relax.  I managed to finish another book which I realized has brought me to 8 completed books since I left Canada!  I ended up with a beautiful break in the clouds and found my way down towards the beach.  

One of my favourite things I’ve been consciously trying to practice has been “grounding,” which is the simple practice of walking on the earth barefoot.  There’s a lot of benefits to grounding, but my favourites have been noticing the toughness in my feet build up, as well as my attentiveness to where I step.  The increased attentiveness has me focusing more on my body and the present moment, and reducing the amount of random mental chatter and wandering I have when on walks.  It’s been a really useful tool for practicing more mindfulness and meditation.  It also reminds me of all the time I spent barefoot as a kid, playing in the backyard, climbing trees, wandering the neighbourhood – it has a way of connecting you back to your inner child.  I highly recommend reading up on it some more and practicing it yourself!

After today, I decided that spending time in downtown Melbourne is not what I’m wanting right now, and with my route I have planned for this year, I know I’ll have plenty of other opportunities to visit and explore the city another time.  

--

So with that, I made the most of Saturday by practicing some yoga on the boardwalk at sunrise, getting some errands in by running to Bunnings and Jaycar (hopefully for the last time finally) to fix my kitchen set up and replace my inverter.  The guys at Jaycar were absolute GEMS! I went in with my inverter thinking I had completely ruined it and was just going to recycle it with them, but the guy at the counter took the opportunity to forfeit a bigger sale and help me open up the inverter and make just a $2 fix!  They also came out to help check on the battery and connections and ended up fixing a piece to make it work even better!  Jaycar has probably been my favourite Aussie store to work with – every location I’ve been to, the employees have gone above and beyond helping me, while making it as affordable as possible.  Can’t recommend them enough for any electronic needs.  Made some grocery shop stops in town, visited another zero waste grocery store ‘The Source.’  Then made my way to Industry Boulders for an afternoon climb! Really loved this gym.  They had some really fun routes and felt really good to focus just on bouldering.  

Made a little impromptu stop at a beautiful art gallery/nursery just off the Great Ocean Highway, and had a really lovely conversation with the resident artist there about how it’s important to remind ourselves that our creations aren’t for everyone.  Create for yourself – the people who resonate with you and connect with your work will follow.  Forcing yourself to fit a mould that wasn’t meant for you, will only disrupt your inner peace and disconnect you from the work you truly wish/are made to be doing.  (artist IG: @saltandpeppergallery).

I ended up heading back to Point Addis for the night since I finished in town a bit later and knew that I wouldn’t have people asking me to move… hopefully.

--

Sunday was a pretty blah day for me.  Woke up a bit later not feeling too great (think I’m on the verge of a cold), so I went in and out of napping and reading for most of the day.  Managed to get myself out for a little walk and make a really tasty pasta dish, but decided to continue taking it easy and spend one more night at Point Addis before hitting the road and taking on the Great Ocean Road this next coming week!

-

After finishing “The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo,” I’ve begun “The Mountain is You” and oh boy am I being faced with some hard doses of reality.  It’s been a humbling read that I’m excited to share some bits n pieces with you all in the next week.

Until next time.

Stay passionate and curious, Hunter♡

04/10/2023

[shyficwriter]

Temporary Home: Chapter 7

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Guardians (With Yondu and Kraglin!)

Summary: Peter is determined to chip your shell away, but unfortunately, his attempts only seem to annoy you. He might need to step up his game, and by that he means recruiting Mantis, which backfires on him. This could be the start of a war, if Yondu knows what he's talking about.

Previous Chapter here | Next Chapter Here Or click here to: Start From Beginning

Author’s Note: I got a suggestion from @maribatshipper to add a scene where some actual raccoons get in the trash and Rocket finally sees a raccoon. I love the idea but I unfortunately didn't get a chance to add it to this chapter as it was finished before I saw the suggestion (I'll probably add it later, don't worry! lol) Anyways, it gave me an idea. What's some stuff you guys would like to see happen in this story? I do already know the direction of the story, but this could also be fun!

Word Count: 3,729

You were going to kill Peter. Probably Kraglin too.

It started maybe a couple hours after "the smelly incident," as you had mentally dubbed it, had resolved.

Peter got bored, found some old DVDs in the cabinet below the TV, and when he recognized a movie from when he was a kid, SpaceBalls, he managed to convince you to watch it with them.

He might have also quietly pulled the "unless you're too shy..." card for the thousandth time, and you might have told him it was getting old and he was working his way towards a black eye, but you did agree to watch the film with them. Peter had somehow convinced everyone else to watch the movie, too. Might have had something to do with the fact that no one exactly had anything better to do.

Kraglin sat at on one end of the sofa, Gamora on the other, and Peter & you were sandwiched in the middle, him next to Gamora and you next to Kraglin. Mantis, Rocket and Groot sat on the floor, while Drax and Yondu took the armchairs at either side of the sofa.

Only you and Peter got the Star Wars references, of course, but there were plenty of parts the others found funny even without it. Rocket mostly laughed about how Terrans didn't understand space at all if you thought that's how things worked, and compared Peter to the main character, Lone Star. He meant it in a derogatory way, of course.

At about the scene where Dark Helmet breaks the 4th wall with the line, "What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?" Peter had started to notice that you didn't laugh openly like everyone else. You always covered your mouth like you were trying to stifle it, despite no one else bothering to be quiet, least of all Drax, who laughed loudly at parts that weren't even that funny.

That simply wouldn't do. You should be laughing freely with the others, like you did when Kraglin and Rocket got tangled up in the hose, which was probably the only time he had seen a genuine full laugh from you, now that he thought of it. To him, this was evidence that he was right, you needed to break that shell of yours and learn how to loosen up.

Annnd... if that required a little mischief on his part... well then so be it.

He waited a bit, just to see if you'd eventually let yourself relax, but when you just kept biting your lip not to laugh and covering your mouth when you started to, he decided he'd 'help' you along.

The scene came on where Dark Helmet's men were combing the dessert with a literal giant comb, and seeing you trying to stifle another laugh, Peter decided to poke you in the side.

You tried to stifle your squeak and you glared at him, but he just shrugged innocently. Poke you? Never... Doesn't sound like him...

He spaced a couple more pokes within the next few minutes of the film, making you jump and hiss at him to stop. He grinned at you and whispered he thought you could use some help laughing, since it seemed you had forgotten how. The little shit.

You irritably whisper back, "That's not gonna work, I'm not-"

Peter rolled his eyes playfully and replied, "Yeah. Sure. Not ticklish. You've said. Too bad I don't believe you." He made to poke you again and you pinched him hard on the arm, which you admit was childish, but he deserved it for annoying you. He gave you a pouty look in response and then frowned when Gamora scolded him and told him to quit behaving like a child.

You sat back and thought he'd finally quit.

And he might have, seeing that it wasn't quite working as he hoped, but Kraglin, who of course noticed your flinching and the childish bickering between you and Peter, caught Peter's eye and they shared a look. He wanted in on the fun. Movie wasn't all that interesting to him anyways.

Five minutes later you received a poke from each of them simultaneously, making your arms clamp to your sides. You turn your head from side to side to glare at both of them. Quietly threatening to break their fingers if they didn't straighten up and just watch the movie.

Based on their expressions it was clear they didn't take you seriously, but they seemed to back off... for about another ten minutes. That's when they decided to poke you again and you jerked up off the sofa with a "That's it." and moved to sit down on the floor next to Mantis where you knew you were out of their reach.

Gamora smacked Peter in the arm for annoying you off the sofa, but no one paid much mind or reacted with more than a glance as they were paying attention to the movie. Well, except for Yondu, who had fallen asleep and was now snoring softly in his chair.

Peter was slightly disappointed that you hadn't been able to let your guard down, but he wasn't deterred. In fact, he was more determined to not just chip at your shell, but shatter it. There was someone who liked to have fun in there, and he was determined to find them and pull them out.

Thankfully, you were able to finish the rest of the movie unbothered. Rocket complained about the sappy ending where Lone Star and the Princess marry, but then Mantis said she thought it was sweet and he waved her off, grumbling about how she thought everything was sweet, or cute, or whatever...

After the movie you decided to go out to the shed and apply the varnish to the bed frame, and when you came back inside to wash some of the varnish off your hands you were startled when Kraglin snuck up behind you to poke you in the ribs. He dodged just in time to avoid being smacked and ran out of the kitchen, his giggles joined by Peter's in the hall.

You sighed, now thinking you should have taken more time in the shed with the varnish. Maybe cooking something would keep you busy enough, but what would you cook? Your first thought was that lasagna would likely feed everyone, but then you remembered the cheese and you were not about to have a repeat of that morning. You were sure the hairs inside your nose were singed-off forever.

You walk out the kitchen door to catch the men still giggling in the hall and they jump from the unexpected sight of you, probably thinking you had come out to properly smack them for deliberately annoying you. You look at them, unamused, and say, "Supper will be in about an hour if you want it. If there's anything else any of you can't eat you should probably tell me now."

Peter and Kraglin exchanged looks before Peter turned back to you and said, "If there is, we don't know it yet."

Kraglin nodded and added, "Not a lot of experience with Terran food, ma'am."

You cringe slightly at being called ma'am, but give a short nod. "Well, here's hoping I don't poison anyone again," you say, turning to head back to the kitchen. You are stopped when another poke to your waist makes you jump and you turn back with a hand raised to smack him.

Peter recoils with a laugh and says, "Just wondering if you'd like any help in the kitchen?"

You narrow your eyes. "Nope. Think you two better stay out here. Clearly can't trust you not to annoy me." You can hear their chuckles as you walk back into the kitchen.

Mercifully, they left you alone all through the cooking and eating of dinner, (you had decided to make a stew). Well, they left you alone physically, that is. Throughout dinner they kept attempting jokes, and it was obvious they were aiming them at you in an attempt to get you to laugh. Most of them fell flat, however, because most of the jokes Kragin told hinged on you knowing about creatures or other stuff not from Earth that you'd have not any way of knowing the context for to make the joke make sense. The others seemed to get the jokes and find them funny though, so at least they seemed to be enjoying themselves. Better than awkward silence any day.

Peter was able to tell a few jokes with Earth references that you could understand, but they were such old jokes that anyone who didn't live in a cave would have already heard them before they finished primary school, so you didn't really laugh at his either. You did, however, smile politely, assuming that they were only trying to be friendly.

After dinner you started to get ready to wash the dishes, and Gamora offered to help.

"No thank you, I've got them tonight." you say, taking the couple of bowls she had gathered and put them in the sink.

"You sure? You cooked for us, it doesn't seem right to let you clean up by yourself too."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to make a habit of it, just... some nights I like to have something to keep me busy, ya know?" You turn on the tap and start washing the dishes. You hated to admit it, but that boiler Fury replaced your immersion with had proven to be very helpful with eight extra people in the house. If you didn't know better you'd say it was magic. Somehow there was just always hot water. You willed yourself not to get too used to it, however. No one had said, but surely SHIELD was just temporarily loaning it until the Guardians finally were able to go back home. You couldn't imagine them just giving you an upgrade like that to keep forever.

"Ok," Gamora relented, not wanting to push it. She could tell you probably still needed a bit more time before you could fully relax. "Thanks for supper."

"Don't mention it," you say, not looking up as you sudsed a bowl.

Gamora nodded and walked out of the kitchen, passing Peter, Kraglin and Mantis on her way into the sitting room. They looked like they were conspiring something, but as a general rule, she didn't get involved in Peter's shenanigans. That meant that unless it was going to directly annoy her, or possibly injure someone else, she pretended not to notice.

She had been right, they were conspiring. Well, Peter and Kraglin had been, Mantis was just along for the ride. With nothing better to do, the two men decided they'd put their energy towards continuing to mess with you, however, it was clear that they needed to get smarter about their approach if they didn't want to risk a black eye.

So they deployed Mantis.

It didn't take much to convince Mantis to do it either. It literally just took Peter asking Mantis if she wanted to play a game and she agreed.

In truth Peter was testing a theory. He watched from the kitchen door with Kraglin as they sent Mantis in to do the poking while you washed the dishes.

She poked, you jumped and spun to face her, clearly thinking it was one of the guys, and then the irritation softened from your face as you realized it was her and all she got was a mild scolding. Mantis looked back and Kraglin encouraged her to do it again with an enthusiastic nod.

This time she fluttered her fingers at your waist from both sides like she had the other day, making you jump again, and, with what sounded suspiciously to the guys to be a poorly suppressed giggle in your voice, you scolded her again and shooed her away.

Theory confirmed. You couldn't bring yourself to try and smack her away like you had with them. Good. He could work with that. Use your soft spot for her against you.

This time they motioned Mantis to come back.

She meets them at the doorway and on her way out whispers, "Did I do a good job?"

Peter smiles, "Yes. You did great. Hey, I want to show you a trick..."

***

A bit later you walked into the sitting room and Mantis calls you over to the table, saying she wants to show you a trick.

She's sitting with Peter, Kraglin, and Gamora, and you walk over hesitantly, wondering if Gamora's presence meant you could assume you'd be safe from mischief or not, seeing as she normally swatted at or scolded Peter for being annoying.

Once you reached the table Mantis stood and encouraged you to take a seat. You pull out a chair at the end of the table and sit, only to be instructed by Mantis to turn and face her.

You eye her suspiciously and then turn to Gamora. "Am I going to regret this?" you ask, your eyes moving to Peter and Kraglin who sat across from her, shrugging and shaking their heads. You were sure you could only trust them about as far as you could throw them, but Gamora appeared to genuinely have no idea what Mantis wanted to show you, so you decided to just play along. How bad could it be?

Mantis instructed you to hold out your hand for her, and you did as asked. She then held your hand palm up and placed her thumb at the tip of your middle finger, and rested the tip of her own middle finger where the palm of your hand met your wrist, as if she were measuring the distance with her own hand.

She then released your hand and moved the hand she used to measure the length of your hand with to your knee, placing her thumb on your kneecap and lowering the tip of her middle finger to rest on your thigh above the knee.

"What are you doing?" you ask, suspicion and confusion in your voice.

Mantis looked up to meet your gaze. She smiled happily and said, "I'm distracting you for this!"

You raise an eyebrow but before you could wonder much about it she squeezed your leg where her middle finger had been resting, sending a tickly jolt through your body and making you jerk in your seat and your breath catch in your throat.

You grasp for her wrist to push her away, but then she just attacked your other leg with her other hand. "Mantis! No!" you squeak, squirming in your seat and flailing for her hands. Every time you'd grab for one hand, she'd free her other hand and send ticklish pokes and squeezes wherever she could reach.

She was was a little stronger and quicker than she looked, so it made the task of restraining her hands difficult for you. You did your best to hold back any laughter as you flinched and jerked from your torment. You could hear Peter laughing and telling her 'good job,' and Kraglin encouraging her to continue, which she did, happily giggling the whole time.

"Peter!" you half scold/half beckon.

"Yes?" he asked teasingly, folding his hands under his chin with a cheeky grin. Gamora rolled her eyes and tried to shake her head disapprovingly at him, but she couldn't help grinning. Mantis just looked so playful and it was honestly adorable.

"Will you-AEK" you squeak as she darted a hand and squeezed at your waist before you could stop her, "Will you make her stop!"

"Thought you weren't ticklish?" Kraglin said with a teasingly smug grin. "That shouldn't bother you at all then. I don't see a problem."

Gamora sighed with a smile at the two men. So that's what this was about. They must have put Mantis up to this.

"Dammit!" you jerk again as Mantis landed another squeeze above your knee. "I'm- I'm not- I'm-" you were having managing words, because each time you attempted, you were cut off by another poke or squeeze from Mantis, and you were afraid you would start laughing if you allowed yourself to talk through it. You were already having a hell of a time trying not to smile, and failing.

"I swear, if you actually say you're not ticklish right now, Pete and I will pin you down and prove that you are." Kraglin threatened with an evil grin.

"Kraglin!" Gamora scolded with furrowed brow, but her warning wasn't taken too seriously on account of the humor laced in her voice.

"What? She's the one being so stubborn she can't admit it!" Kraglin laughed. As far as he was concerned, you deserved it for fibbing. Plus, wouldn't kill you to loosen up a bit- you could be... well, scary... sometimes. Although it was kinda hard to think of you as scary at the moment while you were spasming in a chair as you kept trying to get a hold on Mantis's quick hands and a grin more than threatened to crack your face.

You could feel your cheeks getting warm, hating showing signs of weakness, but knowing you didn't have much choice at the moment. "Ok! Fine!" you cry out, still grappling at Mantis's hands and biting back any giggles that threatened to spill out. You knew when you were beat. It was pretty damn obvious that you couldn't deny being ticklish anymore, and you sure as hell weren't about to give them a reason to actually properly tickle the snot out of you. You wouldn't stand a chance.

"Fine... what?" Peter chuckled in a sing-song voice and leaned on the table.

You could kill him. "Fine! I'm ticklish, okay!? I admit it! Are you happy now!?" Just then Mantis managed to free both hands and briefly tweak your ribs before you got a grip on her wrists again, finally getting a short laugh to escape your throat as you spasmed in your chair. "Will you call her off now, please!?" Gods, this was embarrassing. You didn't know how, but they were so going to pay for this.

Peter and Kraglin high-five and Peter says, "Alright, Mantis, good job."

Mantis stood and clasped her hands, giggling and saying how that was so much fun, and you half-heartedly glare up at her before standing so you could get out of there, but not before turning to aim a glare at Peter and Kraglin. The jackasses.

When you turn back you notice Yondu leaning on the back of the sofa looking amused and you cringe, asking, "How long have you been standing there?"

Yondu folded his arms and pretended to think. "Hmm... Long enough to hear the boys threaten to tickle ya silly and then see ya fold like a cheap tent." Humor twinkled in his eyes and you wanted to melt into the floor.

You inhale and look to the ceiling, your cheeks burning. Your expression then turned mischievous. Vengeance. Now.

"Mantis?" you say, turning back to face her.

"Yes?" she answers, smiling wide and sweetly.

You put on your best, most innocent face. "Ya know, maybe you should do that to Peter. Or Kraglin. Why should they miss out on the fun?" Your eyes flick to the pair menacingly to see Peter looking at you like you just shot him.

Mantis giggles and goes to take your suggestion, bouncing to their side of the table. Peter bolted from his chair, saying, "Mantis- wait a minute!" and tried to run around the table, getting slowed down when Kraglin tripped him, mostly likely to save himself as he also stood to get out of Mantis's way, grabbing her by the shoulders and spinning her in Peter's direction when it looked like she was going after him. Unfortunately for Peter, he didn't get much further after Kraglin tripped him as Gamora effortlessly caught him by the arm and then laughed as she held him in place and he complained.

You turned back to Yondu with a satisfied smile and started to walk past him to leave when he leaned over to speak in a low tone as you got near. "Hope ya know that was a mistake, girl," he chuckled.

"What?" you say, surprised. Peter could be heard laughing and pleading with Mantis and Gamora behind you.

He grinned wider. "If there's anythin' I know about that boy, ya just declared war. An' if that ain't bad enough, now yer stuck in a house with him, and my first mate who ain't got nothin better to do."

"Ah." Your voice cracks, your eyes widening, nervousness creeping into your belly. "Well surely they wouldn't hold a grudge- I mean, they started it-"

He straightened back up and chuckled, shaking his head knowingly. "Jus' figured I should give ya a heads up. Do with it what ya will. Boy's partial to pranks when it comes to revenge. Might wanna be on the lookout for buckets of water above your doorways tomorrow. Or grease in your boots. That used to be Quill's go-to." Mirth glistened in his eyes and made you unsure if this warning was out of the goodness of his heart or if he enjoyed seeing the 'oh shit' look on your face.

You swallowed. Fuck. Just what you needed. A war. You decided it might be a good idea to get out before Peter could escape, or before Kraglin could decide to avenge his friend. "Well I'm going to go to bed now." Your voice was a little higher than you'd like and you could hear Yondu chuckling as you scarpered.

He knew it was more likely you were going to hide than going to sleep. It was barely dark out.

Yondu shook his head and walked to take a seat on the couch, still chuckling at the flicker of fear in your eyes when he told you that you had started a war. He switched on the TV and idly wondered who'd give up first. He'd gotten the impression that you wouldn't be one to back down, despite the nervousness present on your face.

You may have the advantage of being on home turf, but Quill could be relentless. More than likely you were fucked, but it'd be interesting to see how it all played out.

You might surprise him.

[theadventuresofsteven]

lmao im leaving so im not alone

I guess this is like one of those “oh no i went for a walk through the past and now im feeling nostalgic” moments (insert ‘bruh’ sound effect). It’s not healthy for me to keep coming back to this website that reminded me of everything that I was when I was young. Maybe the memories that I missed with people that were significant in my life (cough cough @dreamcowboy) were the main factors that I would remanence about the past. But the reason why I missed the past so much was because now that I’m an architect in Hawaii and being a full ass adult is terrifying, this concept makes me feel like Atlas carrying the burdens of the world. Except the “world” in this metaphor is alcoholism and chronic masturbation. It got to the point where I would run to past experiences since, although not all of those memories were great, they were at least comforting and familiar.

 Replaying moments in my head made me at least feel like I wasn’t alone and that maybe I wasn’t turning into a miserable 50 year old white man that day drinks because their wife has an opioid problem and that Frank from HR didn’t just tank his entire retirement pension. The past was always a place in which I could come back to if the world was too harsh to handle. But the more I went back to the past the more I realized this weird contradicting feeling that would creep over me. The feeling that even though I was running to a time when I felt not alone, it only made me feel even more alone. Well, bud, that’s cause I could always return to a place that no one inhabits anymore. You know how in Mario 64 you can jump into those lil paintings and the mario guy goes “yahoo its mario time”? Thats what it felt like. But when I would come back I was still just mario and those adventures were just memories. 

(Bro that fucking mario analogy gave me a fucking aneurism i think my irresponsible bad habits have fully killed my brain cells)

So i’ve decided to stop running to the past and move forward where everyone else is. Maybe that way I won’t feel this constant impending dread. 

:^)

So why even write this whole thing? Who do I have to prove this shit to? Well honestly it’s like one of the last places where I can still see what Dri (if you still go by that) is up to. So this is the part where I kinda directly just address you (hehe sorry bud but it has been like 5 years). 

I know I fucked up a lot in high school and I know I was a terrible partner to you and put you through some of the most heinous shit. I definitely shouldn’t have dropped off those things at your door but honestly since seeing that post you made about how much I fucked up your life I thought that one last throw of “hey im sorry man i hope we can be square” was a good idea lol. 

I know you definitely don’t want to ever hear from me every again cause I was terrible to you, but to me it’s not that simple. You were legit a huge part of my life and you were actually the first human being that I could look in the eyes and say without a shadow of a doubt that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I know I didn’t show it but also I was a hormonal teenager. Looking back at every other person I’ve ever been with they really were just extensions of the personality of you that I always loved. 

But i know I’m pushin this shit too far or whatever. I really wished that we could’ve kept in touch but i know that doing so wouldn’t have helped either of us so I guess after 5 (6?) years i’m gonna try and stop going back and reliving moments that we shared. (sappy i know but hey my understanding of love is litterally based off of Television and Movies so don’t blame me, blame the Adam Smith and his invisible hand).

I really wish the best for you and your family (hope your dog is doin well :^) ) and I’m truly sorry for ruining things between us. I’m gonna stalk your page more to read those poems you wrote about me one last time before I finally log off this cesspool of a website lol. 

Take care, Dri. 

Yours Truly,

Changqi

[shyneanon]

There is only one bed with red

I bet you thought I was never gonna respond to this one, huh, anon? Nope! I just had to rewrite it like five million times before I felt like it was actually not terrible. lol

Hope you enjoy this even though it’s been foreeeeeever.

---

“Well. Lookit that.”

You stared at the single available bed in the single available room, pretty immaculately kept.

“There’s only one bed,” said Red, leaning against the wall. “How unfortunate.”

You stared at it for a while, then looked back at him. He was flashing his gold tooth at you in a smug grin.

Nope.

“It’s fine,” you said. “I can sleep on the floor.”

His smile vanished.

“Hey,” he said, “hold on, sweetheart. I c’n sleep on the floor.”

Actually kind of nice of him to offer, but as much as he annoyed you… no. “It’s cool, I can do it.”

“Nah, it’s gonna make me feel like trash if I letcha sleep on the floor.”

“Well, ditto.”

He grinned. “Ooh, I gotta solution. How ‘bout we both sleep on the floor?”

You held in a laugh, trying your best to give him a deadpan look. Don’t laugh, don’t laugh….

He waggled his brows at you.

And you let out a snort.

You started to set your things down and move onto the floor but Red shoved you towards the bed. “No,” he said, “I don’ wanna feel like an asshole.”

“You are an asshole,” you said.

“Sure but I don’ wanna feel like one…!”

“OK,” you said, “fine.” Whatever, his loss. You climbed into the bed and got under the covers, and you turned a bit as Red lay down on the floor.

… Dammit.

You sighed. I’m going to regret this.

“Red,” you said.

He turned with an oddly soft smile. “Yeah, beautiful?”

Your face turned warm. His nicknames are more effective than they should be. “Just get in the stupid bed.”

“Oh?” A brow rose, and the soft smile was gone. “Feeling bonely?”

“Don’t,” you said, moving over. “You just look so pathetic on the floor, I can’t do it.”

“Sure, sure.” He moved the covers aside and slid under them with you. “You tell yerself that.”

“I will shove you back onto the floor, Red.”

He shut his mouth (figuratively speaking), and you shut your eyes. He was surprisingly warm for a skeleton, perhaps due to wearing a jacket all day. Since he didn’t have the jacket on, though, you were far more aware of the fact that he was literally just… bone. You could feel his actual spine… It was kind of weird, but not weird enough to keep you up. You were just glad he wasn’t getting handsy. Though the truth was that him getting touchy hadn’t been your main concern. In reality, you tried to avoid having to share a bed with anyone. There was a, um, bad habit of yours that people had informed you of.

But hopefully you wouldn’t do anything crazy tonight.

---

Red was awoken by the feeling of something lying across his whole body.

What the hell?

He was on his side, and he attempted to push it off, but it didn’t budge. Groggy and annoyed, he awkwardly twisted and wriggled until he was on his back and could see what the fuck it was….

It was you.

He squinted, thinking he might be insane, but yeah. It was you. You were lying on top of him. A bit awkwardly, one of your legs was pointing in the direction of your side of the bed, but your head was where the crook of his neck would be, and you were breathing softly.

Red’s face lit on fire instantly.

“Sweetheart?” he mumbled, even though he was pretty sure you couldn’t hear him. When had this happened? Had it happened in your sleep? Had you done this on purpose?

You sighed in your sleep.

Oh… oh my God.

What if she likes me?

Had you instinctively cuddled up to him in your sleep because you… liked him? Or… maybe you liked his smell, or the way lying on him felt… Red was a bit embarrassed to find that he felt giddy, but the giddiness overrode the embarrassment.

“Sweetheart,” he repeated softly, gently wrapping his arms around you. You snuggled closer and he felt his soul start to hum.

We’re… so close….

She’s so cute when she’s asleep….

“You are the most adorable thing,” he said. He knew you couldn’t hear. That was the nice part; he could say whatever he wanted. He started to readjust your stray leg with his own, and his face warmed up even more when you curled your leg around his. He let out a small sound of surprise.

“Baby, you’re uncooperative…. Hah….”

Not that he, uh, minded… having your legs like this….

“Aren’t you just the sweetest,” he purred, pulling you closer. His soul was picking up. While you were asleep he felt no need to maintain his tough guy persona, so he cooed. “Yer cute as hell.”

He nuzzled you, holding you close.

He never wanted to let go….

“Don’t worry,” he said softly, lifting one finger and stroking your cheek. “I’ll keep you safe.” He closed his eyes, relishing the feeling washing over his soul while the two of you were so near each other. “Jus’ stay right here… with me, yeah?”

One hand tangled in your hair and he sighed. It was so soft…. You moved closer to him, making a soft hum, and Red’s grin widened, his soul melting into a puddle.

This was the best night of his life.

—

When your mind started to barely lift out of its unconscious state, the first thing you noticed was that it did not feel like you were lying on the mattress.

The second thing you noticed was that a pair of arms were around you. What the… Red? Why was he…

Oh. Oh no.

I climbed on him in my sleep, didn’t I?

It was a weird habit you’d never would’ve known about were it not for the unlucky victims who had told you about it. You had never woken up on top of someone before— you always woke up next to the person in the morning, in the same spot where you’d fallen asleep, and then they would tell you about how they’d woken up in the dead of night to find your entire body lying on top of them. It also apparently took a lot of effort to push you off, especially since attempts would usually result in you immediately trying to climb back onto them.

Red, uh, didn’t seem to be making any attempts to push you off, though.

“Hah, sweetie… You look so stupid when yer asleep….”

Did he know you were awake? Judging from his low volume, you were pretty sure that no, he didn’t.

His finger wiped the side of your mouth and then immediately withdrew, and you heard him laughing as quietly as possible. Yep, he was trying not to wake you up.

“Gross!” he whispered, and you heard the sound of his hand brushing against the fabric of, presumably, his clothes. “You drool in your sleep!”

More quiet laughter. If you blushed visibly you’d give yourself away, so you just buried your face in his collarbone. Embarrassing.

“... Ah… doll….”

A hand was gently placed on your back.

“I wish we could do this all the time,” he said softly. If he thought you were asleep he wasn’t saying this to flirt with you.

He meant it, then?

“Why’ve you gotta be so damn adorable, huh? M… My soul’s going crazy over here….”

A hand ran through your hair. He was being unusually gentle….

“Then again, that happens a lot when I’m with you.”

Your face got hotter; thank goodness he couldn’t see it from this angle.

His teeth pressed against your forehead. A kiss?

“I wish… I had the guts tah tell ya how I feel.”

Huh? Not… not like… romantically, right?

“You make me feel amazing. Like… really amazing, I… I dunno how t’put it in words cuz I’m real bad with words. S’why I can’ bring myself to tell you, I wanna tell you but every time I open my goddamn mouth all I say is somethin’ suggestive.”

Some silence. Should you tell him that you were awake? You were basically eavesdropping right now.

But at the same time…

“‘N, admittedly… I wish I was good fer you. Which I’m not, I’m… I’m fuckin’ me.”

Why did your heart suddenly ache?

“I’m lazy, I’m sleazy, I dress stupid, I act stupid, I can’t communicate like an adult to save my damn life…. An’ I… I’ve done a lotta bad things. Y… ya should get with some sweet guy who’s responsible ‘n shit.” He muttered: “Lookit me, fuckin’ swearing while I’m tryna talk about my feeli— Fantastic, I did it twice.”

It took all the effort you had to not giggle.

“I wish I was good for you. Ah, sweetie, I’d… I’d take such good care of you, I really would. Or, I’d try. Tryin’ is… really all I could do, t’be honest.”

Trying is all anyone can do.

“... Too bad I suck, yeah?”

Your heart ached again. Red didn’t suck, he was a good guy…. It was probably best to tell him that you were awake before he spilled any more personal information.

“You don’t suck,” you mumbled, turning your head.

“‘M sorry, dollface, did I wake you up with my rambling? I’ll be quiet.”

“No, I’ve been awake for a while.”

His whole body froze up.

“... Ya have?”

“Yeah.”

“H… How much of what I was just saying did you—“

“All of it.”

There was a long, awkward silence.

“I’m sorry,” you said, “I should’ve said something—“

“Fuck,” he said, and you lifted your head. His eye sockets were squeezed shut.

“No, Red, it’s OK—“

“No it’s not, I’ve been makin’ a sappy ass outta myself an’ now I prob’ly made you feel guilty—“

“You didn’t make me feel guilty—“

“Jus’ please don’t say that we should go on a date cuz I know you’re only doing it to make me feel better ‘bout myself—“

“Shut up, Red.”

His eye sockets opened and he looked down at you. You could see the two red lights standing out in the darkness. “... Huh?”

“Stop wallowing in self-hatred and listen to me.”

He said nothing. You would take that as cooperation.

OK, he was listening. So, uh… what should you say?

You actually didn’t know.

So you just kissed him.

Initially he just froze up, but after a moment his arms wrapped around you and he pulled you close, kissing back. W… Wow, this feels really good…. You moved into a better position and felt your hair spill down onto him.

“Sorry,” you said as the kiss parted.

“Sorry?” Red cupped the back of your head and gave you a second fervent kiss. “What the hell for? Ya just kissed me.”

“My hair is kinda touching you.”

“Oh no,” he said in monotone, “how awful. Kiss ruined.”

You snickered and leaned down to press your forehead against his. He looked up at you with fuzzy eyelights.

“I don’ deserve your love,” he said quietly. You smiled back.

“Nobody deserves love, Sans. That’s why it’s so special when someone loves us anyway.”

“You deserve love,” he said, “from somebody better than me.”

“That’s awfully vague.” You kissed his cheek. “And besides, I don’t want love from this person you call ‘somebody better than me.’”

He smiled.

“I want love from you.”

“Hah,” he said, and you saw his eyelights change… They were like hearts now. “Sweetheart, trust me, you already have all my love.”

Your face heated up. “That’s really romantic,” you told him.

“... It is?”

A giggle escaped you. “Yes, Sans.”

You kissed his nasal ridge.

“So?” you said with a smile. “You gonna ask me out or not?”

His eyelights got fuzzy again. “Ya think maybe we could go out sometime, beautiful?”

After kissing his cheek, you said, “I’d love that.”

“So, uh…” He looked at the way you two were positioned. “You think… we could do this more?”

“Absolutely.”

You lay your head down on his ribcage.

“We should fall back asleep,” you told him.

“Sure thing, angel.”

Drifting off took no time at all.

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

k i woke up to thirteen unread messages, so let’s just do a fucking blanket text post covering everything so that i can go curl up by the fire with my aus and pussy eating fics in peace, yeah?

spoilers under the cut

hi, yes, hello, i’m still chill and hype

“but diz,” you say into my ask box. “how can you still be hype when kang has clearly demolished everything we’ve worked so hard for?”

because she hasn’t.

“but aren’t you tired of kang doing all this crazy, inconsistent writing? aren’t you sick of her doing everything for the shock value and not being true to the characters?”

sigh.

y’all.

don’t come for my girl like that.

call me delusional if you want, but to me all of this fits perfectly within the same narrative, which has been leading to canon from the day she took the helm. 

i have already done a thousand and one breakdowns as to why carol getting with zeke was caryl-positive, so i’m not gonna go there again, but the leah thing is too.

“but diz--”

shh, i’m still talking. 

picture this: you are a lonely, lonely man who has gone through hell and back, and it took you years to open up to your found family, only for your best friend to explode and the love of your life to go marry a guy who probably worked at medieval times to pay for college, and now you’re all alone in the woods trying to figure out wtf to do with yourself. 

you tell yourself you can keep visiting your niece and her mom now and then, but that kind of sucks bc of the aforementioned best friend exploding, and also you and your niece’s mom had to murder a bunch of small children and that tends to be kind of traumatizing to remember, so it’s not the ideal situation

but at least you still have your girl, even if she is in an indefinite LARP game for the rest of her life. 

but!

then she says, “actually, i can’t come visit you much anymore, what with the whole community, and husband, and child thing,” 

and then you are actually Alone.

and it’s for the first time, because every time before that you at least had your brother, who might have been a piece of shit, but at least he was there. 

so you meet some chick on the road. you’re sad, no longer feel like you have a family (after it took you so long to get one that you actually loved), and you’re more alone than you have ever been, and you meet this chick who is a loner like you, and you’re wary at first. the two of you don’t trust each other, bc you don’t trust easy. but over time you start to build that trust, and she offers you companionship that you are so desperately in need of, and maybe you wouldn’t usually be into it, but given the Literally Everything Else going on, it’s like, why the fuck not? you have N O T H I N G left.

so she gives you an ultimatum--her or what little is left of your family. well, your family is scattered to the wind and being around them only hurts you more, and this person is offering you a chance for something new (and when things get rly bad, hasn’t your go-to move always been to run anyway?) so you say okay. you say you’ll go.

except nvm, she ditched you, lol, you’re all alone again! sucks to suck.

skip ahead, you’re back with your family, and your og girl has dumped the LARPer, and maybe things can be good again, except there’s a bunch of people going full hannibal lecter wearing other people’s faces on their own and murdering everyone, and your og girl is actually insane rn due to years’ worth of unresolved trauma, and you’re suddenly a dad, and you’re being asked to make nice with the guy who literally tortured you, and honestly? it’d be hard enough as is to trust again, but this whole situation is NOT HELPING. 

so by the time the war ends you are tired, and you are hurt, and you are wary, because you keep losing things that matter. and you got back the one person in the world who mattered the most, except she did some super questionable shit, and you’re having a hard time reconciling it, and finally you just Lose It, bc goddamnit, you’ve earned it, mkay? you are entitled to a little blow up. if she gets to literally blow shit up then the least you can do is yell a little, like damn.

but. 

she’s the one person in the world who matters most. a rebound fling over the course of a few months =/= ten years of being soulmates. you’ll forgive her, she’ll forgive you, and the two of you will ride off into the sunset together, almost as if you were suddenly in your own spin-off show. 

what a concept?

/fin/

“alright, but diz--”

OH MY GOD HOW DO YOU STILL HAVE OBJECTIONS?

listen. here is what daryl/leah teaches us:

-daryl is willing and capable of having intimate relationships

-that being said, daryl being in a relationship has been a Big Thing for everyone, regardless of who they ship him with, since s1, so if it was supposed to be The Most Important Relationship Ever to him, the juicy parts would not happen off screen. there’s a reason the sex is only implied. they’re not showing it until it’s the Real Thing

-we now know daryl has had sex in the past ten years, so maybe he’ll actually last more than six seconds when he bones down with carol! very good!

-this also teaches us that hoo buddy, y’all have some mixed morals when it comes to these characters. the “daryl would only be in a relationship if he rly loved them, so how could he possibly love carol still?” thing is like. dude. carol is MARRIED during this, and he doesn’t get to see her much anymore. is he supposed to just walk around jacking it while crying for the rest of his life? the man tried to move on, and the tragic thing is that he got screwed over. i do not think this is out of character at all. i think daryl fell in love with carol, she got married, he was lonely, tried to move on and convince himself he could be happy with this other chick (who might be rly cool, who knows??), and then he got his heart broken again, before it ever really healed to being with. the boy is a giant bleeding heart who is getting stomped on constantly, and y’all better stop yelling at him for trying to feel better or i’ll come for you. this is like carol having rebound sex with zeke. if you want your characters to be realistic then you have to let them do human things, holy shit

this is getting excessive, let’s tie it up.

the main takeaways here are:

-no it’s not out of character

-yes it fits the narrative, kang isn’t just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what sticks, it all has a purpose, which is why i’m totes fine with it

-leah might not actually die, which thank god, i thought it was douchey of them to kill off another woman for Man Pain. i’m glad i’ve been wrong about her and connie both

-oh yeah, connie...i have no new feelings on connie

-daryl now has sexual stamina, so we can all update our headcanons now

-“i can’t believe they end the episode on such a sore note! their friendship is almost destroyed, how will it ever recover??” ...how are you surprised? that was...that was literally the description of the episode, my dude. that one didn’t exactly come out of left-field. it’ll be okay, they’re gonna make up. hopefully through a bunch of hyperbolically tragic misadventures. it’ll be a good time, calm down

-there is a FUCKING SPIN-OFF coming, how can you think they won’t reconcile?

-actually it’d be super funny if they were just giving each other the silent treatment throughout the entire thing lmfao

-“have you seen that new caryl show?” “yeah, it’s fucking weird. there’s no dialogue??”

-anyway

-does it help if i said i secretly thought they might fuck the whole time, specifically for the reasons stated above, and i’ve been kinda into it since the promo but didn’t say so bc i didn’t want to get hanged? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-idk y’all, that’s all i got. drink up ig?

i just found out that i’m literally anemic, and y’all are still more exhausting than anything else. it’s okay to just like. enjoy things. i promise.

now if you’ll excuse me, i have aus to dive head-first into. i’m not gonna say a whole bunch else about shit unless it gets rly necessary. i think i will make this blog relentlessly positive out of spite, and will just post fics and shippy gifs. i have a photoshop free trial (thatigottomakeaberniememe), mb i’ll make sappy caryl gifs as practice and bombard you all with them. feel free to come by for cheering up, but i’m not gonna repeat myself six thousand times, either

stay hype, STAN KANG, and get daryl to call carol sweetheart 2k21,

-diz