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l0vergirlwrites · 7 months ago

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gulity as sin ; eddie munson

synopsis: since eddie joined your friend group, you’ve fallen for him. but sometimes the feelings you’ve harboured for him make you feel guilty—but he’s just too dreamy, so how could anyone blame you?

warnings: sexual innuendos, mentions of weed & alcohol & partying, mentions of sexual thoughts, downbad!reader & eddie, love confession & makeout!!!!

note: inspired by taylor swift’s song “guilty as sin”

alsooo i just had to get this out of my system because ahhhh!!!

“just so you know, you’re staring at eddie like you wanna fuck him” robin whispered in your ear as she came to your side with extra vcr tapes to stack near the back of the store.

“jesus! am i really?” you asked in a hushed whisper, face crowing warm with embarrassment. you couldn’t help it when eddie just looked so good as he leaned on the front counter talking to steve.

while you mentally face palmed yourself, robin gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “just a little bit”

peeking back over her shoulder at eddie to make sure he wasn’t looking at you (because you’re anxious & paranoid), you let out a breath of relief. “you think he noticed?”

she laughed “i hope not”

letting out a quiet gasp, you shoved robin’s shoulder “thanks for the vote of confidence, rob” you said sarcastically.

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry!—but seriously…” she paused for moment to create dramatic effect. “when are you gonna fess up & tell him how you feel?”

the big question.

with a big sigh, you shook your head in retreat. “probably never. it’s just some stupid crush—& besides, we’re just friends. i don’t know if he’d like me like that, rob.” you said while getting back to work, trying to get the image of eddie’s ring clad hands out of your mind so you could focus.

“is that really how you feel? or is your fear of rejection speaking for you?”

narrowing your eyes at her, you rolled your eyes knowing she was kidding (but was she? were you really hiding behind a guise so you wouldn’t get hurt?).

“you know,” she paused to look at eddie. “if he doesn’t want to jump your bones, i’d be floored” she said cheekily, causing you to nudge her rib cage.

“he doesn’t” you stated, but in your mind you hated the thought of it.

“if that’s what’ll help you sleep at night” she chided before moving onto a different shelf, the open space letting your eyes drift back to eddie, only to find that he was looking right at you.

“you coming to the party by reefer rick’s place on the weekend? i convinced stevie boy here to tag along—“

“—& to be the DD. i don’t know how i got roped into this” steve cut eddie off with an exasperated expression.

with the spotlight (eddie’s eyes) on you, you couldn’t help but feel stuck in place & your mind was running a million miles a minute.

clearing your throat, you nodded. “yeah sure! i should be able to if keith doesn’t make me come in last minute”

the last sentence caused eddie to roll his eyes.

“who cares about what keith says—you’re coming & you’re gonna have fun! you’re deserving of blowing off some steam, right?” eddie said convincingly.

“he’s right! fuck keith & his stupid last minute shift calls“ robin agreed with steve soon following suit.

jokingly with your hands up in surrender, you finally agreed. “maybe you guys are right…”

“of course we are, babe!”

the pet name eddie called you made your stomach flip in six directions, your face growing warm until steve beat you to speak.

“when the hell did ‘babe’ get into your vocabulary, munson?” he asked eddie with a quizzical eye.

“oh calm your tits harrington—“

“hey man, i don’t have tits & i am calm so shut—“

“hey!” you yelled, shutting them both up. “no bickering on my watch, idiots” you pointed to them both, causing eddie to place his right hand in his heart in apology.

“what do you expect,” robin chimed in. “they’re five year olds”

you both laughed a bit at her comment while the guys just rolled their eyes.

“well, i’m gonna head out & prep for my next campaign. butttt, i’ll see you geeks saturday?” he asked while twirling his van keys around his index finger.

before steve could try to rebuttle against eddie about him calling you all “geeks”, you beat him to it.

“yes—we’ll be there! bye eds” you waved sweetly, your hand flattering when eddie shot you a wink before heading out the door.

as the glass door chimed & shut after his departure, you immediately turned to robin.

“he winked at me!” you mouthed to her with excitement.

“are you guys secretly talking without including me, again?”

turning to steve, you gave him an apologetic look. “she was just fawning over how eddie winked at her” robin said with a nonchalant smile, causing you to gasp.

“robin—“

“why do you care if he—wait… ohhh… that makes sense” he lit up like a light bulb, going back to checking through the return log on the computer.

you stood there stumped at his reaction.

“is me liking eddie predictable?” you asked aloud, causing steve & robin to share a glance.

“yes” they said collectively, leaving you to sigh & turn back to the shelf to finish stacking the pile of tapes.

**~*~**~*~*~**~*~~*~**~*~*~~***~*

it was now saturday, & you were on speaker phone with robin as you were getting ready for the party.

you had decided to wear a short flowy black skirt, fishnet tights, your favourite black boots, & a dark green babytee with your favourite band on it. it was simple, but cute (& you secretly hoped eddie would think the tights were a nice touch).

“do you think you’ll tell eddie how you feel once you get some liquid courage in you?” she asked genuinely.

with a thoughtful sigh, you stopped applying blush to your right cheek. “gosh, rob—i don’t know. i don’t think it’s a good idea”.

you could tell she was shaking her head from the other side of the phone.

“remember when i was too afraid to tell vicky i liked her?”

you knew what she was gonna say. “yes, i do”

“so, you remember how you told me i should just ‘go for it! do it before it’s too late—what’s the worst that could happen?’, right?”

you slumped in your desk chair, fidgeting with your makeup brush. “yes…”

“sooo, you gotta practice what you preach—tell him before you regret it!” she encouraged, but still, you were horrified to.

“what if—“

she shushed you. “no what ifs. don’t do that to yourself—just be honest when the right moment comes along”

staying silent for a moment, you thought it over in your head before coming to a conclusion.

“maybe you are right, robin”

“i’m always right—regardless of what steve says” her words made you laugh, relieving you of a little stress.

**~*~*~~~*~***~*~**~**~*~*~~*

it was now nine-thirty on the dot & you could hear steve’s beamer honking from your driveway, signalling that it’s time to go. as soon as you stepped onto your driveway, you were met with hollers & whistles from your friends in the car—including eddie.

as soon as you saw him with his head out the window, whistling & vocally saying “shit y/n, looking good!”, you could’ve sworn you were going to collapse then & there.

shushing them before their hyper annoyed your neighbours, you (coincidentally) got into the backseat with eddie.

“you have everything?” steve asked before reversing the car.

“yes, dad” you joked before a silver flask was shoved into your lap.

“got you your favourite” eddie told you with a smile, causing you to audibly “awe” & thank him before taking a swing from it.

despite steve having a fancy car, the backseat was surprisingly small, so you knew it was going to be a long night with how your thigh is already pressed into eddie’s & his fingers were tapping his jean clad thigh dangerously close to your exposed one.

you caught him every now & then staring at your tights too, which didn’t help the fantasies brewing in your mind of him taking them off you.

“you excited?” you asked him while steve & robin were caught in their own conversation.

swiping his tongue across his teeth, he looked at you with a gaze that made your stomach tighten. “as long as you stick close by, then yeah i’m excited” he nudged you gently, allowing you a moment to process what he just fucking said.

tucking your hair behind your ears (a sign that you were nervous & liked him & were going insane), you let the conversation drift into comfortable silence as steve turned the radio up.

thank god for that.

**~*~~**~**~***~**~*~~**~**~*

the party eddie brought you guys to was packed at some random house on lover’s lake.

& it reeked of pot & beer, which was normal & expected.

with the flask eddie gave you in your right hand & eddie’s hand in your other (because the front lawn was packed & he didn’t want to lose you), your group maneuvered your way inside to disco party lights, sweaty bodies, more pot & more beer.

your grip on eddie’s hand was taut as you continued sliding past more & more people while muttering “excuse me, sorry!” over & over until you guys arrived on the dance floor.

“do you want anything?” eddie leaned down & whispered into your ear so you could hear over the music.

you took a second to answer because of how warm his breath felt against your skin. “no i’m okay, i got this remember?” you said with a smile, holding up the flask he gave you.

returning you a smile, eddie let go of your hand because robin was pulling you to dance a little.

“be back in five!” eddie mouthed to you, holding up five fingers & looking at you until you waved in acknowledgment.

“okay there’s no way he doesn’t want you” robin yelled into your ear as the song changed & people roared happily.

laughing & shaking your head, you disagreed.

“cmon! let’s just dance, yeah? destress!” steve yelled to you both before bopping his head to the music, causing you & robin to look at each other before laughing & join in.

the more songs played & the more you swing back eddie’s flask, you could feel yourself letting loose a little—possibly even making you feel courageous.

so much so that when eddie returned with a red solo cup with some sort of drink, you slung your arm around his middle for a quick hug.

“missed me?” he yelled in your ear.

“just maybe” you replied, feeling his right hand rub your arm up & down before fetching a joint from his pocket.

“missed me more now?” he asked again, laughing when you nodded your head, eyes glassy from the smoke in the room that was building.

“outside?” he yelled again, & you were the only one that agreed.

*~*~*~~*~~*~*~~**~***~*

departing from steve & robin to go smoke, eddie grabbed your hand once again & kept you close as you both made your way to the back porch that outlooked onto the water.

the backyard was still filled with people, especially jocks who were doing dumb keg games, but you didn’t mind. with your back against the siding of the house & eddie in front of you, caging you in, all you saw was him.

& god he looked hot. his hair was a bit frizzy, but his leather jacket managed to showcase his muscular arms & his slightly cropped band tee allowed you to see the happy trail on his abdomen.

it took everything in your power not to fold then & there.

“you want the first hit?” eddie asked as passed you his drink & pulled his lighter out of his pocket.

with a simple nod, you placed the joint between your lipstick covered lips & leaned forward for eddie to light the end of it for you. the action felt extremely intimate & already hand your skin tingling.

with the joint slotted between your fingers, you took a few hits & relished in the buzzed feeling it already gave you. & knowing eddie & is interest in pot, you knew whatever was wrapped within the joint was the good shit.

while you were taking your hits, eddie was reminding himself to not get hard at the thought of your lipstick rubbing off onto the joint or how you looked pretty with smoke exhaling from your mouth—he could feel his pants start to feel the tiniest bit tight at his view of you.

when you handed the joint to him, eddie stood beside you on the wall & took his time (possibly so you could look at him a little longer?).

& you didn’t care because he just looked too perfect with his head tilted up, the veins in his neck showing in the porch light, the joint rested between his ring clad fingers—you could already imagine yourself getting off to this image of him later—but you reminded yourself to stay cool.

everything was fine! you guys were just friends!

“you feeling okay?” eddie asked, turning to you who was already giving him soft doe eyes.

“better than okay” you smiled, leaning your head against his shoulder because you felt too warm under his gaze.

“wanna get off inside?” you heard him ask, causing you to cough & blink for a moment.

“shit—what did you say?” you looked at him, feeling his hand begin to interlock with yours again.

“i asked if you wanna go back inside—you sure you’re good?”

oh god, now you were hearing things.

“y-yeah, good idea” you mumbled as you followed his lead, holding on tight to avoid getting broken apart through the sea of teenagers & college students.

you only broke apart when robin pulled you in for a hug, hearing her say “it felt like you were gone for ages!”

for the rest do the night, you told yourself to he lost in the music rather than thoughts of eddie munson doing nasty things to you, which was going pretty successful until you felt his breath on your neck again.

“wanna dance?”

& how on earth could you say no?!?!

you let him pull you into his arms, his hands firm on your waist while yours were loose around his neck.

with the pot & other alcohol mixing in your system, you felt on top of the world. especially with eddie’s eyes on you. he’d twirl you around in circles & give you room to dance your heart out with him in your grasp & steve & robin would give each other knowing glances about whatever was brewing between you too.

you felt hot, sticky, & tingly all over your skin (not just because eddie was touching you) so you pulled his head down a bit to yell in his ear. “i’m gonna find a washroom!” & he was leading you around the house to find one without a question.

once you both found one of the third floor of this outrageous house, you pulled eddie in with you & turned on the light, thankful there was a dim setting.

“jesus, that was bright!” eddie shielded his eyes, causing you to laugh as you hopped up onto the counter.

exhaling a sigh of relief, you let your head lean back & rest against the mirror while eddie leaned against the closed door.

“do you need me to like, turn around or something…?” he asked, wondering what you were going to do.

“no—i just wanted to go somewhere quieter. less sweaty bodies”

he nodded understandingly before shamefully looking you up & down, telling himself to not get hard at the sight of you so pretty. you were already falling down a rabbit hole of all the things you want to do with him right now, each more dirty than the next—it would be just so easy for him to take off your skirt & unbuckle his pants—wouldn’t it?

but the guilt started to seep in & make you hide your face to groan in annoyance because why on earth were you spiralling like this?

“is something wrong?” he walked to you, holding your wrists & pulling them away to uncover you.

“just going insane is all” you replied, causing you both to laugh until he reached up to wipe off some of your smudged eyeliner from your under eye. he just needed to touch you somehow.

“guess what an old friend told me while i was getting a drink earlier��

you tilted your head in wonder, staring directly at eddie’s lips as he spoke.

“he saw us walk inside & told me that we looked like some couple from a movie—don’t remember which one though…” he ended with a murmur, too focussed on swiping his thumb on your cheek until you spoke up.

“is that a bad thing?” you asked, suddenly feeling small in this washroom with his hand directly on your skin.

eddie was closing in on you now, & you didn’t want it to stop.

you instantly felt sober now. especially with how each swipe on your skin felt like he was making you his—which was definitely an exaggeration but how could you need feel that way when he was holding you so delicately?

shaking his head ‘no’, eddie’s brows furrowed. “of course not—it’s not a bad thing. i-i just thought it was, i dunno, cute—“

“cute?” you questioned softer than him, a smile in the beginning stages of forming on your face.

was this your moment that robin was talking about? you sure hoped so.

“i-i think that’s the right word” he stumbled over his words, feeling your right hand brush some hair out of his face.

“i think so too”

& then there was comfortable silence.

you weren’t sure how to move forward from here. do you tell him all your feelings for him that you’ve keep hidden in a vault at the back of your mind? do you tell him that you’ve been fantasizing about him for weeks? that he’s the only one that makes you feel so many things?

you wish this part was easier.

“would it be, i dunno, uncalled for if i told you that you’ve been driving me crazy?” eddie asked, immediately unlocking said vault inside you.

“are you serious?” you asked, completely sober now as you pulled his hand away from your face & fixed your posture, eyes locked on his for the answer.

“as serious as the dead” his breath hitched, unsure if he made things worse or misread whatever signs you sent, but before he could apologize your hands were already on his face to pull his lips to yours.

it was a messy, top lip & hungry kiss that you’ve been dying to experience since you first laid eyes on him. & god did it felt right, with his tongue meshing with yours & his hands gripping your fishnet covered thighs as he pulled you closer to his body with aching need.

it was the kind of kiss that tried to convey just how you felt about him, the wanting & lusting from afar, the longing glances & lip bites when he made you feel a certain type of way.

it was catastrophic & heavy but sweet with laboured breaths of beer & smudged lipstick.

“holy shit” eddie breathed out against your lips, chasing him for another kiss because it was just that good but you were smiling & clashing your teeth against his & giggling from how silly it all felt.

“that is why i’ve been going insane” you panted against him, hands falling to grip the cotton of his shirt.

“i’m crazy about you eddie. & it’s not the drugs talking, i promise” you swore, scouts honour.

with his forehead pressing against yours & laugh escaping his lips that had little bits of your lipstick, he squeezed your thighs. “i would hope not, ‘cause i’m really crazy about you too”

you closed your eyes now, relishing in the weight lifting off your shoulders & how his touch felt electric. “eddie” you exhaled.

“yeah, sweetheart?” his fingers were pressing different patterns on your thighs to the point where you asked in yourself if he was writing ‘mine’ across the fishnet material.

“can we do this again tomorrow?” you asked, already longing for this feeling to last, praying this wouldn’t be just a one time thing at a party.

“i don’t plan on letting you go anytime soon, so yeah, i think we can make it happen” eddie smirked, kissing you quick before pulling back to see your swollen lips.

“wanna go back to the party & surprise the geeks?”

“i’d love to”

& with eddie whisking you from the counter, hand on your hip as he lead you back downstairs, you both immediately saw steve & robin jumping up & down happily when they witnessed you two looking like love sick idiots who finally fessed up.

young love, am i right?

#l0vergirlwrites💌#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fem!reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x y/n #stranger things fanfic #steve stranger things #stranger things netflix #fanfic

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innorogers · 21 days ago

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Vigil

Steve Rogers x Reader (You / OFC)

Summary: For a man who has faced down gods, monsters, the end of the universe, this kind of fear is new to him. It’s not the enemy outside he fears—it’s the thought of losing you, of failing to protect you. Again.

Warning: Mention of sex / Fluff & Angst / Protective Steve / Jealous Steve /

Characters: OC, Tony Stark, Maria Hill, Bruce Banner, Sam Wilson, Sharon Carter, Natasha Romanoff / John Walker

Also: Thanks in advance for repost or any feedback ❤️ Let me know if you want to be included in the taglist (DM, comment, repost and tag, whatever works)❤️ You don't need to read the previous chapters but it will definitely enhance the experience if you do.

It ended just as expected. Steve cummed twice in the shower—once in your mouth, because, damn, he tasted amazing after cleaning up, and again inside you, because you smelled just as irresistible with that jasmine scent in your hair.

So here you are, three cups of coffee later, and about to nap on your desk. The body Hydra gave you was strong, but you’ve been in a car chase, with the Iron Army hunting you down, fought in a nightclub, and probably had four or five rounds of sex with Steve. You honestly don’t know what was more exhausting. You’d guess the mission that had gone rogue, but honestly, the sex just left you breathless.

"Oh, rough night?" Robert handed you a fourth cup of coffee, eyeing the dark circles under your eyes. "Need the adrenaline shot?"

"Um…" You actually considered it for a moment. Your body metabolized stuff like that too fast, though—it would only last for a couple of hours, tops. "Nah, forget it.” You need your brain clear to process everything that happened.

“I’ve heard…” Dr. Lin’s voice interrupted your thoughts as he leaned casually on your desk, his eyes scanning the room where your colleagues were clearly whispering about you. “That Captain America had quite the adventure yesterday. Right after leaving the UN, too.”

He tsked and pulled out his phone, showing you a few grainy clips. Footage from CCTVs and some shaky handhelds—probably from people who had their phones out at the right moment. “A broken bridge, streets on fire, and…a fight in a nightclub? You’re gonna need more than coffee to survive this shift, I think.”

You groaned, rubbing your temples. “Too late for damage control, huh? Is it all over the news?” You could only imagine the hell Steve was going through with Commander Hill: ‘I gave you 1,278 security protocols, and you ignored them all?!’ Yeah, you weren’t setting foot in the command room today.

“Not quite all over the news yet—mostly social media.” Dr. Lin was clearly enjoying the UN’s PR disaster a bit too much. “I think they’re working overtime behind the scenes to sweep it under the rug. Captain America gets attacked his first time outside the compound during ‘The Reconciliation of the Century’? Yeah…someone’s having a bad day in PR.”

“Anyway…as I was saying…You’re gonna need more than coffee, we’ve got company today…”

“What? Company?” You were surprised. “They’re letting people in?!” After yesterday’s security breach?

“Seems the first New Era Project agent that the UN sent was a fraud or didn’t work. And since we visited them yesterday already, today, they’re sending some new guys.” Dr. Lin looked at you, lowering his glasses: “Yikes, right? So for today, we need to pretend we’re working. ‘Cause we’re not sharing our real stuff…which will make this day unbearable.”

Oh. You grimaced after Dr. Lin turned around and began “working.” Yeah, you knew everything about how the last agent went wrong. But actually, this ‘pretend to be working’ thing was good—you needed to analyze everything that had happened.

You opened a document connected to Tony’s hub and started typing, outlining the details for him in your usual style. (It was your private little system—documents stored in The Crib, or what the three of you called the ‘Geniuses’ Sticky Notes.’) You’d barely finished bullet point five when someone in a crisp military uniform appeared beside you, smiling next to your screen.

“Hi, Doctor—whose phone number is still confidential. Nice to see you again.” John Walker said smiling, quoting the line you’d once used to refuse giving him your number.

Oh dear Lord, he really should have taken a nap with you when he had the chance, instead of those three—no, four rounds of sex you had in the dressing room and the shower.

Steve thought after suppressing another yawn, trying to focus on the screen, where Thadeus Ross was losing his temper again, explaining why the UN had nothing to do with the attack he and you got yesterday.

But who was he kidding? Steve almost smiled. Nope, no way he’d have preferred the nap over the sex. That was exactly what he needed after being hard almost the entire afternoon. And four times weren’t enough—he would have gone on if you weren’t in the dressing room.

For fuck’s sake, when is this over? He couldn’t wait to get back to your private lab-slash-home, have a light dinner, and get in bed with you.

Oh, that’s a nice thought: a sex marathon for the weekend is all he needs after this hellish week. He started thinking of your intertwined bodies, your begging moans that sounded like heaven... Yeah, okay, he needs to focus. Maybe listen to what the Secretary has to say instead of thinking about your messy hair, your heavy breath, your skin that felt like silky sweet milk, and your mouth... Yup, stop. Let’s hear Ross, so he doesn’t get hard again in the middle of a full meeting room.

He felt a glare on him, so he looked around and saw Agent Sharon Carter staring with her eyebrows raised, as if saying, “Gotcha, pay attention.” Steve suppressed a smile and looked down. Oh boy, this was going to be a long day.

“I thought your super friends were going to be attending this meeting too.” Once the screen was off, Sharon smiled at him while picking up the folders and files.

“Well... Hill and Sam are still in Fraser’s interrogation. Tony and Bruce are tracking back the security breach. Natasha and Clint took over my place in training since I’m busy with other things. So...”

Basically, what happened was that when Tony asked who would be taking this mission, everyone stepped back, and I was the only idiot at the front. Steve shook his head internally.

“In that case.” Sharon gave him the usual confident wink. “I’m glad. It’s been forever since we shared a mission.” She grinned. “Last time almost cost me my career.”

“Yeah...um...lucky, things sorted out on that one...” He was a little embarrassed but still grateful for Sharon’s help during the Civil War chaos.

“I’m kidding with you, okay?” Sharon teased. “It’s not like I almost got into federal prison or anything.” She sighed a little, lowering her voice: “Although, I wouldn’t have minded if I had to.” She said with a soft voice and a sparkle in her eyes, looking at Steve with sincerity, which made him stiffen.

“So, how have you been?” Steve nodded and asked with a polite smile, pressing the elevator button for her as they headed to the cafeteria floor. “How does it feel to be at the UN? I heard the benefits are better than the CIA, though unfortunately, you’ll need to deal with us again.”

"Ah, I don’t know what you're talking about," Sharon said with a wink, grinning playfully. "Every agent’s dream, right? Dealing with the Avengers, working alongside the great Captain America... even if, well, my boss would rather face another alien army than deal with the politics of this initiative."

“Well, that’d make two of us.” Steve chuckled, and opened the cafeteria door for her.

The hum of chatter and the clinking of dishes filled the air. The compound’s cafeteria was large, efficient, and—much to Steve’s relief—quiet at this time of day. It was near lunchtime, but still a little early for food service, so the air was full of a coffee’s aroma that lingered from breakfast. They got in line for coffee and a quick snack, and Sharon gave him a sideways glance, her expression teasing as she grabbed a sandwich.

“Oh wow, you guys have affogato as dessert? I could consider getting back to work with you guys just for your catering service.” Sharon said, breaking the brief silence as they moved along the counter.

“Well, if you consider that, I could make my best effort to get your agent’s number back.” Steve grinned, grabbing just a cup of coffee.

“Oh yes, lucky number, huh?” She stopped for a second as she laughed and said, “Remember that place we went to… Venice? What was it called, the best affogato in the world.”

“Benicio’s?” Steve nodded. “Yeah… it’s closed now. I mean, gone during the Blip, hopefully reopened now.”

“You didn’t have the affogato, though,” Sharon said with a playful hint in her voice. “Mr. ‘I don’t know how to relax since I got into a fight with Stark and we’re on the run.’”

“Hey, I was the international most wanted. I think it was okay for me just to stay out of the loop. Imagine if I got caught because of ice cream. That would’ve been…”

“Funny? Quite a story to tell? Best date I’ve ever had?” Sharon shrugged.

“...Embarrassing.” Steve said with a smile. “Or awkward, or even humiliating.”

Sharon shook her head and laughed. They found a table by the window, where sunlight poured in, and Steve took a seat across from her. He could see the curiosity in Sharon’s eyes, the slight hesitation before she spoke again.

“It really was, actually. One of my top three dates.” Her smile turned more serious, her voice low enough that only Steve could hear over the ambient noise. “Too bad it ended so… abruptly.”

Steve wanted to say, "We would never have made it too far", but he only sighed.

He didn’t want to dismiss her feelings, and he couldn’t deny that something had existed between them. It was brief, but also real. A shared history they couldn’t quite forget or ignore.

Sharon was strong, smart, and capable—someone he admired deeply and cared about. He appreciated her confidence and her courage, but that connection, though meaningful, was nothing compared to what he felt for you now.

That had been a stream. With you, it was tides, waves, the entire ocean.

“We made a good team.” Steve said with a smile, being honest and looking directly into her eyes.

Something about it made Sharon hold her breath.

She could remember moments in the past when Steve had the same effect on her. He would just gaze at her, and her heartbeat would skip or beat too fast.

Maybe that’s why she hadn’t pushed harder when it didn’t work. If she had fallen, completely and madly, as she’d wanted to, the power he held over her would have been overwhelming.

She had risked her entire career just to help him, and they were… nothing. Just a kiss, just some kisses or dates. So what would have happened if they’d continued? She couldn’t imagine a life where she had so little discipline about her feelings, mind, or heart.

“I know.” Sharon spoke softly, still holding his gaze. She was taking a leap of faith now. Cause she couldn’t help to wonder—could it have worked?

What if…they gave it another chance? They didn’t have the menace of the universe’s destruction now, the chances of Steve (or her) being a fugitive again were none after Thanos, so what… what if…?

“But…” She began, but Steve suddenly turned as something caught his attention.

It was lunchtime, and the employees began to arrive at the cafeteria, you among them, with Dr. Lin at your right and John Walker at your left.

“Captain Walker, I really don’t need a date. I have a boyfriend, no, um… fiancé.” You said as you picked up a tray and started serving lunch on your plate, remembering how Steve just highlighted this morning that the ring was indeed, a ring.

“It’s John.” Said a very cheerful John Walker, who was not stepping back from asking you out, even though you had been determined and clear about your “NO”s and reasons.

“Well, does this fiancé have a name? And where’s the ring?” he said while picking lunch and placing food, walking backward with a gracious wink.

“OH MY GOD!” You and Dr. Lin said at the same time, your eyes widening as you noticed the ring was missing from your finger.

“Where’s the ring? D…did you lose the ring?!” Robert was panicking. Did you just lose the engagement ring Captain America gave you?!

“I don’t know, it was on my finger...” You were looking in your lab coat pockets and in your clothes.

“It’s a tracking device, equipped with the last of Stark technology, how...how can you lose a tracking device?!” Dr. Lin couldn’t believe it.

“Your boyfriend put a tracking device on you?” John hmph'd with a laugh. “What a douchebag!” He put a hand on his chest. “I promise, I would never do such a manipulative, controlling freak thing to you.” He winked. “I’ll look out for other guys who come close, of course, but that’s another level of jerkiness. Ugh...a tracking device, what is he, a psychopath?”

“It’s an engagement ring,” you replied, frowning, though you didn’t think of giving out too much information to him. You thought back to the last time you saw the ring, which was before you took it off when you entered the UN HQ.

You pulled out your phone, wanting to send a message to Steve just to confirm.

Some strands of hair curved in front of you when you looked down, and John, who was standing in front of you, couldn’t help but stretch out his hand and brush them to your shoulder. His fingers ran through your hair, and his fingertips touched your ear as he accommodated it for you.

Before you could react, a loud crash echoed through the cafeteria, like the sound of a broken cup or mug.

Sharon stood in shock as Steve slammed his cup down so hard the porcelain shattered. His face was livid, veins bulging in his neck, and his fists clenched so tightly his knuckles were white.

He abruptly stood, the chair scraping loudly behind him, and stormed in your direction.

"I've got it, babe." Steve said. He didn’t miss a moment of the interaction and was at your side in an instant. He took your hand, his eyes locked on John Walker, and carefully slid the ring back onto your finger. “It was in the pocket of your gear.”

Both captains exchanged tense, serious looks. You could feel the sparks fly between them as they made eye contact, and after a long moment, Steve finally smiled.

“I’m guessing you're here as a representative of the New Era’s Project, Captain Walker?” He said, placing a firm hand on your waist, his grip tightening slightly.

“Yes.” John replied with a polite but sneering smile.

“The knowledge exchanges from R&D have been…quite enlightening. I can’t wait to see what the best of your team has to offer…to me.” He said as he raised his jaw and tilted his head toward you. You could feel Steve’s body tense, like a bow stretched to its full capacity and ready to snap back.

"Take whatever gear or armory you want, Walker," Steve said in a cold, measured voice, as the entire cafeteria fell silent, all eyes locked on the tension between the two men.

"But the best of this compound is far beyond your reach. And don’t think for a second that you could ever put a finger on that." His voice dropped to a dangerous whisper, teeth clenched. Touch my girl’s hair again, and I’ll cut your arm off.

"Steve." A calm voice cut through the tension as Commander Hill appeared at the doorway. She walked in with steady confidence. "We’ve got news. I need you and Dr. Lancaster in the Command Room."

Steve didn’t immediately move. His gaze lingered on Walker for a few more seconds, with unspoken warnings in his eyes. Then, without a word, he turned to you, gently taking your hand in his, and led you out of the cafeteria. The weight of Walker’s stare followed behind you both, but your focus stayed fixed on your fiance's figure.

No one spoke in the hallway as you walked toward the Command Room. You could see Steve’s rigid expression. He was pissed, his jaw tight, shoulders tense as if holding back more words.

But you were… well, trying your best to hide the curve of your lips. Just like he had back in the car when you sobbed that you’d go to Wakanda and talk to plants for the rest of your life if he ever left you to go back to his gorgeous ex.

Oh, so he was this jealous? Even a little possessive? He got this mad just because a guy touched your hair? Now, if Steve were any other guy, maybe this would seem like a giant red flag, but this was the love of your life, so…

You slid your hand into his palm, pressing your skin to his, and intertwined your fingers with his.

Steve’s expression softened, and he looked at you, letting out a quiet sigh. He smiled when you mouthed, I love you.

Commander Hill, however, wasn’t in the mood for your lovebird moments. Her face remained stern as she waited for the door to close behind you, sealing the room.

"Agent Frazer was found dead this morning."

The words hung in the air like a punch to the gut. Steve’s hand tightened around yours as his expression shifted from softened warmth to immediate alertness.

You lowered your sight.

Somehow, you had a feeling this was coming anytime soon. It was weird, though. Agent Frazer was not your brother; he just pretended to be for some time (and then actually tried to brainwash slash attack you). But for a moment, you wished that had been true, that your brother was alive, even if he had been turned against you. So now he is dead, and you feel strangely sad.

Your way of dealing with it? Throw yourself into the facts.

“How?” you asked, almost mechanically. “Was it because… his neural synapses overloaded, triggering an energy surge that short-circuited his cerebral cortex in under a millisecond? Like… like someone or something… wired his brain to self-destruct?”

Maria’s eyes widened, and she gave a quick, silent nod.

Steve’s grip tightened, haunted by your words. At that moment, he panicked, cold sweat through his shirt, fear dominating his senses when the possibility of losing you suddenly struck hard in his mind. So, could anyone do that? Snap their fingers and cause you a brain dead?

His body was merely processing under this thought. He felt the urge to hug you, to feel your warmth and heartbeat under his skin, to feel you entirely safe in his arms. But you were in the command room, so he didn’t move.

“Can we make sure that…” His voice trembled slightly. “What happened to Frazer…” doesn’t happen to you?

Commander Hill noted his panic, so she gave him some time to process.

“Oh no.” You noticed too, so you reassured him, squeezing his hand back: “That won’t happen to me. I’ve only been through one brainwash. It takes more than that—multiple processes, open surgery. And Hydra… they didn’t have the tech to pull it off. Not back then.”

“But…” Your mind raced ahead, piecing things together. “Whoever did this? They’re desperate.”

You rubbed your forehead, and as your hands dropped, Maria noticed it: that look on your face.

The same intense, calculating look Steve wore when he was seeing things no one else could—analyzing every possibility, tracing out the most brilliant, cunning plan, whether on a battlefield or at a table of white collars and power brokers.

“Jarvis, any chance Bruce and Tony are in the crib?” You needed to process your ideas, but you also needed someone who could remember everything you’d said.

“They are on their way here, Dr. Lancaster.” answered the A.I. “Crossing the elevator’s door at this moment.” said Jarvis as both entered the room.

“Please tell me you already have a preliminary conclusion?” said Tony, stepping into the room.

“Okay…” You stood in the middle, your mind moving faster than words as you started laying out the analysis.

“They have access to Hydra files—there’s no other way to explain it. Clearance levels that aren’t just high for regulars; files that were locked, or used to be locked, behind old S.H.I.E.L.D. encryption. And the remains of my file? Only a few could access those after Hydra was dismantled.”

Tony leaned back against the wall, arms crossed, tracking your every movement. Bruce sat at the edge of a table, hands loosely folded, but his furrowed brow betrayed his concern.

“So, leftover Hydra goons or former S.H.I.E.L.D. agents?” Tony asked. He didn't want to say it aloud, but there was also another possibility: a breach, here, inside the Avengers.

“Or both.” Steve raised an eyebrow. “Ex-S.H.I.E.L.D. operatives who went dark when Hydra fell. People who know how to stay hidden but had deep ties to the old Hydra infrastructure.”

“Even if they had the files, they’d need money. A lot of it, if they’re working with the kind of tech that got into Frazer’s head.” Bruce said, swiping through the files on the screen.

“Yeah, this doesn’t sound like some underground merc group.” Maria said, standing beside him as she watched the files on the main screen.

“This is serious, billionaire-level investment. Whoever’s backing them has access to bleeding-edge tech. Retinal implants, memory manipulation… that’s not standard black-market operation. The kind of power they’re throwing around is something only the Avengers or S.H.I.E.L.D. had access to—the old S.H.I.E.L.D. when they were still around.”

“So, they’re gearing up for something big, or they’re hitting a wall. What are they trying to accomplish? Why use Frazer as a puppet?” Tony followed the line of thought.

You hesitated: “I think… They’re close to something. A breakthrough, maybe. Or…” You stopped and narrowed your eyes, thinking aloud. “Or they’re failing. Desperate. They’re making bold moves because they need something critical. And that something is… me.”

Steve’s expression shifted. His fingers locked onto yours, tightly.

“The attack was directed at you. Frazer was pretending to be your brother. And to confirm your existence.” Tony sighed, frustrated and feeling a pang of guilt. He hid you all these years, thinking you would be safe. He should have let you out of the New Eras Project. The Avengers had so many ways of detecting enemies without using your powers. Fuck, he should have listened to Steve when he warned him to let you out of the Project.

“Of the twelve of you, you’re the only one with… those powers.” Steve murmured, almost clenching his teeth. He felt the urge to hug you, as if you were going to disappear or vanish in the next second.

“And a success case.” You said, not wanting to scare him but knowing you all needed the entire picture. “The only survivor, the only… prototype. Still alive. In my body is the source code for why these experiments or creations worked.”

“Wait…” Tony’s glare was fixed on you. “If the endgame is to copy your ability… What could they even use that for?” But it was a self-answering conversation. He was just thinking aloud: “…a soldier who could walk into a building and identify every weak point before the first shot is fired. Or worse, detect something we’ve built to be undetectable.”

“Why stop there, Tony?” Maria’s expression was serious and cold. “Why would there be only one? Hydra made a dozen back then, and they didn’t even have half the tech we have now.”

Bruce frowned deeper, his voice low: “If they’re that close, then we’re on borrowed time. They’ve already brainwashed Frazer, and now they’re playing with neural implants and synaptic overrides.”

“Exactly.” You nodded. “And they are so desperate, they don’t care if we know they’re out there now, because they’re so close they can taste it. Once they succeed, they won’t even fear the Avengers’ powers anymore.”

Tony exhaled sharply, his glare cold. “So, they’re building something. A super soldier, or an army of them—enhanced with tech that would let them see through just about anything.”

“And they’re not far from getting there. But for now, I’m still the key to unlocking that power.”

The room went quiet for a moment as the weight of your words settled in.

“Well, isn’t that just fantastic.” Tony applauded, the whole thing giving him a headache. “We’ve got super soldiers with x-ray vision on the horizon. And they’ve got you in their crosshairs.”

“So basically, we need to see what triggered this sudden desperation.” Bruce leaned forward, and his mind began to analyze: “We could scan for energy centralization around the globe. Human creation needs vast electromagnetic fields to power high-level bioengineering, especially when manipulating neural pathways at this scale. We need to track when or where all this is happening. But…”

His voice was tense.

“I’ve got a feeling they’re at the door already. Because whatever they’re building… they’re almost done.”

The way back home was silent. You could feel the atmosphere heavy with unspoken tension. Steve hadn’t said much since you left the command room. His usual warmth and quiet strength seemed overshadowed by something deeper—fear and anxiety, clunging over him like a dark shadow, haunting him at his heels.

You wanted to speak, but your mind was processing too. You were trying to remember everything you knew about yourself and your siblings, every memory, every piece of paper you’d seen in Hydra labs, every layer of analysis they’d made you go through.

The ride home was silent, his jaw tight, his gaze fixed on the road, even your house slash lab was after all the securities protocols and protective layers Maria had put, he was still alert, as if there were something in the grass and trees of the compound that would attack anytime. You could feel the weight of his thoughts, pressing down like a storm waiting to break.

"Babe there's no need��" You said as Steve moved around the house once you've arrived.

He checked every window, every door, securing them with an almost obsessive care. He paused at the front door, his hand lingering on the lock as if it was the only thing standing between you and the threat he couldn’t control.

You watched him, knowing that this wasn’t just about protecting you—it was about the fear within him.

"Steve, I'm here." You stopped him. Placing your hand on his back: "I'm here. With you."

He turned to you, his face pale. His eyes were haunted, wide with the kind of fear you rarely saw in him. He’s worried.

No, not worried, he’s terrified.

Without a word, he pulls you into his arms, wrapping them tightly around you like you might disappear if he let go. His grip is firm, desperate, as trying to shield you from an invisible danger that only he can see.

His breath is uneven, and you can feel the tension radiating from him. For a man who has faced down gods, monsters, the end of the universe, this kind of fear is new to him. It’s not the enemy outside he fears—it’s the thought of losing you, of failing to protect you. Again.

You don’t say anything at first. Words won’t soothe him. So you just hold him back, resting your head against his chest, listening to the rapid beat of his heart. Slowly, you lifted your hands to gently press them on his neck, cupping his face to make him look at you.

"I'm here. And we will be ok." You say softly.

These words made him tremble. Will you? How can you be sure? How could he know? What if…

He couldn’t imagine what he’d do if he lost you.

“I won’t let them take you.” He said, as a sacred oath, tatooed in his soul. “I’m going to set up more protocols.” He muttered, pulling back just enough to look into your eyes, his expression one of steely resolve beneath the worry. “More security. I’ll have Tony upgrade the system. I’ll have guards outside. I’ll—”

You stayed still in his arms, feeling the rawness of his fear. His body was tense, and you could feel the tremble in his muscles, the weight of his panic pressing against you. He wasn’t just holding you for comfort—he was holding you like you were the last solid thing in a world that was quickly unraveling.

“Steve,” you interrupted softly, placing a hand on his chest. “You can’t protect me from everything.”

His eyes locked onto yours. “I can try. And I will.”

"Babe…this is the Avengers compound. This is…the safest place on earth. Or even the universe."

"It took only one protocol. One permission. Approved by me." He said with teeth clenched. "I gave him clearance. One, to bring Frazer in front of you, I won't ever, ever let that happen again." He said with conviction, his expressions somber as he remembered everything you went through.

But beneath his determination, you could see the cracks: the anxiety gnawing away at him, the overwhelming fear that no matter what he did, it might not be enough.

"Steve…"

“You don’t understand…” His voice is strained, thick with the fear that he hasn’t been able to shake since the moment he realized you were being targeted. “I’ve seen too much. I’ve lost too many. If something happens to you—”

He pauses.

“I can’t lose you.” He whispered, his voice barely audible. He was a man made of iron will and conviction, but here he stood, vulnerable and raw, stripped bare of all his usual defenses.

“Hey, hey, hey…Listen.” You said, holding his face in your hands, forcing him to meet your gaze. “I’m here. Right here. I’m not going anywhere. I'm here, with you, I'm safe.”

He looks at you and feels a pang of pain to your innocent even naive words.

Safe? Were you safe when he was on the other side of the wall and couldn't do anything but watch as you almost fell under Frazer's brainwash? Were you safe when you pressed a tranquilizer to yourself?

The memory of you in his arms, unconcious and slipping away was so vivid.

His hands tightened around you again at that thought, his grip shaking slightly. “I just... I can’t stop thinking about it.” He admitted, his voice strained. “What if I can’t get to you in time? What if something happens and I’m not there? What if…”

“I can’t take that risk.” He mutters, more to himself than to you. “ I can't. I won’t let anything happen to you. Not again.”

You pull back just enough to look up at him, your hands resting on his chest. His blue eyes are filled with a vulnerability you’ve only seen in rare moments— when the weight of the world is too much, even for him.

“Steve.” You say soft but firmly: “We’ll get through this. Together.”

For a long moment, he just looks at you, his eyes searching yours, as if trying to find reassurance in the depths of your gaze. Slowly, he exhales, but he doesn’t let go. That deep-rooted terror of losing you, isn't going away anytime soon.

His arms remain wrapped around you, protective and unyielding, as though he’s made a silent vow that nothing—no person, no secret organization, no force on Earth or beyond—will ever take you away from him.

If only that could be true.

THE End but TBC

Continue to Chapter 10: Eclipse

Alright I'm SO SORRY I'm late!! 2 Full time jobs really is consuming me!! I hope you enjoyed it!! Sooooo I have a really serious question RN, could you doooo me the favor to lmk your thoughts!!

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*can you let me know if I've missed anyone in the taglist? thanks <3

#captain america x reader #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x reader #captain america x you #chris evans fanfiction #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x female reader #captain america x ofc #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fluff #chris evans characters

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cheriden · 4 months ago

Text

「オトナブルー otonablue 」。。。

The realization that he’s been gaping at you for a while hits him hard, clearing his throat as he comments, “You look stupid.” You fake a punch midair at his oh-so-insightful critique, pouting. Soobin notes the pink sheen that coats your bottom lip, feeling his heart stutter on itself.

── synopsis 。Celebrating your entry to senior high school, you decide to change your style up a bit.

pairing 。choi soobin x f! reader

.ᐟ genre 。fluff

.ᐟ tags 。high-school au, friends to lovers

.ᐟ status & word count 。oneshot | 2.59k

.ᐟ warnings/notes 。reader is fem presenting and has insecurity/vanity issues, as always i did not proofread

It’s summer; the station bustles with movement—passengers on their phones and overhead systems announcing the arrival of the upcoming train. The pathetic whirs of the overhead fan do nothing to quench heat, small children running around even as the floor is shrouded in something sticky, further aggravating you. Afraid of missing the next ride, you yank at Soobin to get his attention.

He’s busy though, entertaining a flock of girls currently plaguing him about himself. Soobin was never the type to leave a person hanging, more out of the fear of one’s judgment over pride for himself. “My type?” He ponders, ignoring your incessant curses and the gush of the passing vehicle. It takes off, only urging the brunette to stall further out of spite for your punching at his midrib. “Someone tall and pretty, with a confident personality. Preferably older.” Eavesdropping, though can you really call it that?, you glance at how the group deflates his response, even as you’re busy annoying him. He excuses himself, points at the train behind him prior to interlocking his arm with yours, and drags you away to the loading platform with your eyes still on the girls.

They’re captivating, towering and slim; you’re pretty sure you’ve seen idols and celebrities wear something similar, and you can’t help but stare down on yourself. You look homely: A plain house shirt that isn’t quite a type fit nor oversized, green cargo shorts that stop at your knees, flat sneakers that don’t do your height any favors and a hello kitty hair clip you’ve had since birth messily clamped into your hair. Lost in thought, you’re almost mauled by the door as the taller pulls you inside. He tuts, “We’re gonna be late because of you.” Rolling your eyes, you plop down onto one of the seats, Soobin following suit. “We’re late because you were busy flirting,” you retort, “late. On the first day, nonetheless.” A scowl spreads across his face, using two fingers to push your forehead, causing you to bump your head against the metal. “We wouldn’t need a review center if you didn’t flunk your statistics class.” Reaching to yank his hair, you fall short and stick your tongue out at him instead. “And why are you here? Because if my memory proves me right, you’re on the verge of failing it too.” The next stop frees up space, opting for Soobin to sit next to you. “Your mom ratted out about this place to my mom. I was gonna pass just fine” A rather obnoxious laugh falls from your mouth, earning the judging glares of random passersby. “If “just fine” is you randomly filling out your bubble test sheet, then I guess we’d all be just fine.” “Stop doing those air quote things!” He groans, swatting your fingers. “You’ll see. I'll finish all my work early and be free for the rest of the break.”

“It doesn’t work like that, idiot. You know what, it doesn’t even matter.” You lie, more for yourself than for him. “I doubt college entrance exams have it, I heard they don’t allow calculators.” Shaking his head, he presses his head on the window, trying to figure out the upcoming terminal. “Nah, you’re expected to do it mentally. Get up, this is our stop.” Mouth falling open, you try to collect yourself as Soobin yanks you up. “Are they insane?! How do they expect me to do all that in under an hour?” He shrugs, arms on your shoulders as you navigate the current of bodies. It’s summer, yet fate has you running back and forth the city studying for exams and running chores.

Half of your subconscious is listening to the instructor as she points at the whiteboard about—well, you don’t really know. The other half focuses on the magazine in your lap, free hand flipping through the pages as the other (pretends to) solve the problem in your workbook. A noise resounds through the hardwood desk, and you look up to see that the source is your seatmate’s ballpen. Relief fills your body as you pull all your attention onto the lesson, though it’s cut short when you see a notebook slide onto your side of the shared table. The sheet reads: “What are you looking at?” Nudging the pad over to you, you write back, “Fashion inspo. Want a makeover,“ with a sad face haphazardly sketched beside it. The other moves inches near the side of your face, voice small and low as she whispers. “Meet me in the women’s room after our session.”

The giddy feeling doesn’t leave your body, not as you were impatiently rushing through the activities, and not as you wait inside the washroom like a child waiting for their parent. She exits the stall, and it’s only then that you take in her as a whole. The girls from earlier were no match for her: hair freshly bleached and lobes pierced, thin shrug and loose crop top on as she strides in front of the mirror. “Sorry, had to pee.” She mutters, eyes glued to her hands while washing them. “So, why do you want a makeover?” Playing with the strap of your bag, you’re unable to give a direct answer. You aren’t even sure yourself. “Well, since I’m entering my senior year next term, so I think I styled myself more mature.” The other nods, eyes boring into yours as reflected by the mirror. “I think you’d look good with blue hair.” Blushing, you flounder over yourself, trying to maintain composure. “Thanks, but my school wouldn’t even allow makeup.” The blonde drags you over to the counters, dumping her sanitary pouch. “So, wear light makeup.” Your eyes glimmer as they scan each product, all the packages of pink, black, and red sitting prettily on the marble. “That’s a thing?” Nodding lazily, she grabs your wrist and one of her various lip balms, swatching it across the skin. “You don’t seriously think the prettiest girls in your class are barefaced, do you?” Listening attentively, you watch patiently as the other retreats her things into her tote. “You got your wallet?” You nod. “Got any cash on you?” You tilt your hand sideways, and the blonde thinks it’s good enough. “None of my old stuff matches your skin tone. Come on, we’re going to hunt for supplies.”

“Soobin! Wait up for me you idiot!” The brunette turns his head in hostility, slightly taken aback by your form. “Were you going to leave without me? Huh? You psycho.”

He inspects you from head to toe: The new barrette that shimmers in plastic gold, fitted tank top that sits halfway atop your belly button, denim shorts that reveal the plush of your thighs, platform sandals that you surprisingly don’t wobble in. The realization that he’s been gaping at you for a while hits him hard, clearing his throat as he comments, “You look stupid.” You fake a punch midair at his oh-so-insightful critique, pouting. Soobin notes the pink sheen that coats your bottom lip, feeling his heart stutter on itself.

Wait, what?

He dismisses the feeling, shooting back, “You left without me yesterday. I was just going to bike today.” Pout deepening, you clasp your hands together for mercy. “Please let me ride with you, ‘Binnie? I used all my allowance yesterday.” He laughs in disbelief, mounting his bike. “You’re so dead when your parents find out you missed a study day.” Screaming into the air, you grasp onto his shirt in an attempt to stop him from leaving. Not like he was going to, but he finds you hilarious like this. “Not if she kills you first for wearing that out.” You huff, crossing your arms at him. “It’s hot Soobin. Do you want me to die? Do you want me to die of a heat stroke or by the hands of my own mother?” Tapping his chin, he fakes a thought. “Both are very tempting.” You stare at him as if he betrayed you. With a smirk, he pats onto the seat behind him.

Upon arriving at the center, you roam around the sidewalk while waiting for the other as he locks his bike to the racks. Soobin can’t help but observe you sulk at the view of other kids your age out and about with their friends, eating ice cream and complaining about the weather, like that was the worst thing they had to worry about at the moment.

Out of the corner of your eye, you spot a familiar figure waving at you. As he nears you, you gasp and wave back, poking at the brunette relentlessly in order to get his attention. “Soobin! Yeonjun’s here!” You rush to hug the aforementioned, immediately patting down his pockets for anything edible. “She hasn’t had anything since breakfast. Spent all her money on useless things again.” Scoffing, you let go, adjusting the fit of your top. “All my purchases are investments! You don’t understand me.”

Yeonjun continues to ignore the two of you bicker, interjecting when you escalate to name-calling each other. “Aren’t you dolled up today?” He asks rhetorically, toying with the edges of your hair. The tallest watches you gleam at the words, linking your arm with the eldest. You fish for compliments, pressing the weight of your body against his, “Right? Am I pretty today?” Yeonjun finds endearment in your ceaseless puppy-eyes, and the brunette can all but see the non-existent tail wagging in the other’s presence. “Yes, you look very pretty today.” You squeal, and Soobin’s a bit annoyed, though he chalks it up to the fact that you’ve been outside in the heat for what it feels like hours. “See Soobin? See? ‘Junnie thinks I’m pretty today.” He rolls his eyes in response, walking through the front door as the two of you continue to trail behind him, hand-in-hand and complimenting each other like lovers.

The hours seem to slip away with surprising swiftness, feet tapping as the tutor concludes the session. It’s a Friday, and Soobin promised he’d go to the arcade with you today. Making your way through the halls in search of the brunette, you peek through each door, halting at the familiar ring of your name.

“I seriously don’t know what she’s up to. She looks stupid with that eyeshadow. It’s abhorrent.” Crouching by one of the corners in hiding, you can hear the giggling of those you recognize to be your schoolmates. “Must be seeking attention. Honest to God, it’s so unserious. Like she raids her bigger sister’s closet when she’s not home.” Fiddling with the hem of your top, you latch your teeth onto your lower lip, unable to stop the prick of tears forming at your eyes.

You suppose your interest in vanity was rather sudden, a shock to those around you and even to your closest friends. Combing the clips out of your hair, you toy with the frayed ends—a result of using an iron to style them like the models in photoshoots, the girls on the platform, and your seatmate with bleached hair. Maybe it was stupid and pointless. Why was this even affecting you so much? All you wanted was to feel good about yourself. You bury your face in your arms, cries flowing freely and silently onto the floor.

Just then, a large figure shadows you, prying your arms apart desperately. It isn’t until you hear who it is that you stop to gaze up. “Where the hell did you run off to?” Soobin asks, grasp on your sides softening when he notices the redness in your cheeks, ugly snot running from your nose.

For a while you’re just staring at him. He’s properly handsome—big eyes, tall nose, plump lips. You think it’s unfair. “Do you genuinely think I look stupid?” His brows furrow, brain struggling to connect the timeline of events that had led you here. “Where did that even come from?” In an attempt to restrain yourself from sniffling, it results in an even uglier, unhinged snort. You ignore it, as well as the look Soobin gives you. It’s not sharp, it’s not pity, you’re not entirely sure what it is. “I thought you said it was your type?” He lets out a large exhale, chuckling as he settles beside you. “Is that why you started dressing like this in the first place? ‘Cause I just said that so those girls would get off my back.” It takes him a while, but you can practically feel his body shoot up as he comes to an epiphany. “Do you like me?” Your body mirrors his shock, but in your case it’s a call to defend yourself. “I thought it was universal like!”

A genuine smile finds its way onto his face, disappearing when he clears his throat. “Well,” he starts, cupping your face as he pulls you in closer, “I like you regardless of what you put on.” Tracing the ends of your jaw, his eyes move to gaze onto your lips, then your eyes, then your nose. He connects every feature of yourself that makes you, you. Your heart gets caught up in your throat, thumping a million times per second. Eyes screwed shut, you clench your bag when the warmth of his breath mixes with yours. He seals the gap with a peck on the mouth, movement stuttering as you feel his nervousness through the action. A beat passes, but you kiss back—head tilting to slot into him. His lips taste of sugar and bread, a reflection of its plumpness as it glazes itself in your lip balm. Everything about him is warm, and you all but chase it when you disconnect, both of your cheeks flushed in pink as you falter and pant on his shoulder. “So I’m guessing you like me back.” He remarks, still unsure of himself as he toys with the strings of his sweater, eyes avoiding yours. “So what? You liked me first?” Taking it as acknowledgement, he bites the inners of his cheek with a meek smile,”Well, I only found out recently.” Your hand ghosts near his, desperate for his warmth again but too afraid to say anything. “I think… I’ve known for a while now… Just needed something to make me think of it consciously.” His fingers are the same, testing the waters when he carefully entangles it with yours. In an attempt to lessen the amount of awkward tension that holds the air, he states the obvious. “I think a kiss would do it, yeah.” It doesn’t work, not really, so he gets up to stretch the nerves off, you following suit with his hand still in yours. It’s your turn to try saying something, but you’re not really sure what to say. “My lipstick is ruined.” Of course, your main default is to complain and nitpick. “You must take responsibility! I had a hard time putting all this together.” He grins when you gander at the physical connection, inspecting it from all sides as you rotate it slightly. “You still look pretty.” He asserts, swaying them back and forth as you make your way out of the building. “But would you say it was a good investment?”

Soobin’s head swivels to flash you his pointed eyes, “Are you surveying me for a product review after I kissed you?” With a shrug, you bump your body against his with a little force. “Maybe. Or maybe you should kiss me again.”

“Maybe.”

reuploaded! because tumblr was being mean to me

thank you for reading! feedback, reblogs and tags are appreciated♡

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hiraeth-witch-11 · 2 years ago

Text

Bond to Happen Part 4

Part 4: A Girl's Night Out

Warnings: some discussion of violence, very light suggestive material, alcohol

Word Count: 1600ish

(I know it's a bit short, but a certain key character will make their first appearance so hopefully it's worth it)

“Matt pulls dumb shit all the time, but ‘testing’ you to see how far you’d go was not fucking okay,” Karen says angrily.

“It could’ve been worse,” you shrug.

“How could it have been worse, hun?” She shouts incredulously.

“He could’ve lured me into a trap and left me to deal with it myself, he could’ve straight out attacked me, outed me to a bounty hunter, drugged me, let me get shot or stabbed-”

“Jesus, that’s where your mind goes?” She looks shocked and you nod.

“People do terrible things to my kind, I don’t blame him for being curious,” you say honestly. You were surprised it hadn’t happened sooner.

“Matt shouldn’t have done that, babe,” Karen says softly. “You deserve better, you should expect better, especially from your friends.”

You tilt your head at her in thought. You hadn’t expected her to be this upset for you, when you told her.

Deciding to change the subject, you say, “Well, now that you’re all caught up on the Matt and Frank drama, can we leave?”

“Yeah, as soon as you get ready,” she nods.

“I am ready,” you insist, looking down at your clothes.

“You wear jeans and a t-shirt when you go out?” Karen asks in disbelief. “How do clubs even let you in?”

“I’m almost always wearing the ‘don’t look too close’ spell. They don’t notice what I’m wearing,” you say defensively.

“Sweetie, I love you, but we are dressing up before I take you out,” she insists, turning to her own closet.

You groan. “You aren’t taking me out, you’re tagging along because of the new Buddy System rule. I don’t need to look good or even be visible, to feed, Kare.”

“But if you look ‘good’ and let people see you and focus on you, won’t that increase your energy intake?”

“Screw you for being so smart, Karebear. Where did you even learn about that?” She was right. If people focused on you, their energy would push towards you and make this shit version of feeding more efficient. You just hated dealing with the attention by yourself, sometimes people didn’t take no for an answer and you’d learned that the hard way.

“I’ve been studying soul and body energy theory,” she shrugs as she continues to dig through her closet.

“Really? Why?” You ask incredulously.

“For you, silly,” she tosses the words over her shoulder.

You swallow a knot of emotion trying to make its way up your throat. Karen had looked into something complex and confusing, put in effort without you asking, and used it to try to help you instead of using it against you.

“Here, this should work. We aren’t exactly the same size, but this is adjustable so it should balance out.” She hands you a red wrap dress. It’s a little bright for your skin tone and conservative for a club with a skirt that almost brushes your knees, a high back, and long sleeves. But that was intentional, you wanted to avoid any accidental skin contact in such a crowded place.

You shuffle to the bathroom to try on the dress. Kare was right, it didn’t fit you the same way it did her, but you were surprised that you actually felt pretty wearing it. As conservative as it was everywhere else, the neckline made up for it, plunging a couple inches below your breasts. You step out of the bathroom to a very excited Karen.

“You look hot, babe! I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen you in a real dress. I’m so proud of you for branching out!” She claps.

“I wear skirts and some dresses,” you grumble, ducking your head to hide your blush.

“Yeah, yeah, but those are your casual comfy clothes. They don’t count. Seriously, where have you been hiding those,” she asks teasingly, glancing at the cleavage fully on display.

You blush fully now. “They’re gonna fall out the second I move, Kare.”

“That’s what double sided tape is for, babes. Trust me, I’ve got experience with this dress.”

You let her apply the tape to the dress and your skin. She’s careful to minimize contact, knowing that you are anxious and sensitive right now.

“It’s a good thing your boots match, we’ll have to go shopping before next time. Our shoe sizes are too different for you to wear my shoes.” She looks a little disappointed at that fact.

“I think your shoes would actually kill me if I wore them,” you laugh, looking at the tall heels lining her closet.

“Hah, you’re tougher than that,” she snorts.

You’re happy with your boots, though. They were black and sturdy, with a small chunky heel and laces you’d woven protective charms into. Over your skin toned tights, they were comfortable. You carefully did a little make up, mostly a dark shade of lipstick and mascara, before tucking yourself into the cab next to Karen. The ride to the club was too short as you grounded yourself for the evening.

“I’m here, sweetie. If you need anything or you want to go at any point, say the word and we’ll go back to my place and do some self care with wine and those cookies Mrs. Brown brought yesterday,” she says soothingly, reaching slowly and with purpose towards your hand. You nod and she gently squeezes your hand reassuringly.

“I can do this,” you say, just as much to yourself as to Karen. “It’s okay to be seen, I’m safe.” You carefully relax your hold on your magic, letting it spread like mist and settle as it pleases, your walls are down and the energy of others hits you like a wave of dry summer heat. Intense, a little suffocating, but you’ll adjust. Taking one more deep breath, you removed the spell that kept eyes from focusing on you. “Let’s get a drink,” you say clearly.

“I’m proud of you, babe,” she whispers into your ear. You give a little smile and order something sweet and fruity, light on alcohol to keep your mind clear. You already felt invigorated, like a cup of coffee beginning to hit your bloodstream. More awake, more focused.

After a few minutes of chatting over the music and nursing your drinks, you toss your’s back and suggest with a toothy grin,”Let’s go dance.”

******

Across the room, your magic was taking note of something you would not be consciously aware of until several months later.

Billy Russo didn’t frequent these places as often as he used to. They were loud and crowded and although he maintained a youthful appearance, he was getting too old to enjoy this sort of thing as frequently. But tonight, he was glad that he decided to go out. Across the room, at the bar was a woman who’s energy was magnetic with a soft glow to it.

She wasn’t necessarily his usual type, not that he would restrict himself to just one type of woman, or person in general. Even so, there was something about her. Maybe it was the way she grinned at her friend. Maybe it was the scuffed black boots laced with multicolored beads and charms, out of place among the stilettos and pumps of those around her. Maybe it was the way her eyes flickered blue or her hair that moved as if she had her own personal breeze around her. Maybe it was the way the sea of people dancing parted for her as she dragged her friend into the mix. Maybe it was all of those things and the fact that he could smell her and only her. Lavender. Something earthy, like the beginning of a desert rain storm. And the sweetness of her drink on her breath. All of those things, wrapped in a tight red dress that had now disappeared into the crowd.

Billy didn’t know what the woman was, but she wasn’t human, that was certain. He sipped his drink and closed his eyes for a moment, focusing on the energies of the people around him. Billy was surprised to find the gentle fog of blue magic wrapping around him as if it was trying to draw out his own, something he kept under a tight control. The only energy others would see was what he carefully crafted for them. The soft blue energy seemed to be testing the boundaries of his own, brushing up against him in search of the real thing. Choosing to ignore it was the wise decision. Pulling away would only suggest he had something to hide, a fact he’d learned years ago. So he let the curious energy drift around him before it settled comfortably in a loose circle around his spot on the semi-circular booth.

*******

Unaware of your magic’s bold and autonomous behavior, you dance with Karen. Sometimes goofily, other times practically grinding on each other as you feed off the room. You feel different, safe in a way you didn’t usually when feeding. You attribute it to Karen’s presence and thank her for accompanying you as you collapse on her couch when the night is over.

“I’m glad we did that, I’m exhausted, but it was super fun. It’s been a while since i had a proper girls’ night,” Karen agrees, flopping down next to you as she kicks her heels off. “How do you feel?”

“Better, like I had a cup of coffee and took a nap. I don’t feel as exposed right now.”

She hums in acknowledgement. “Good, we’ll do this again before the end of the month.”

“Sounds good,” you say, not bothering to argue that you usually wait longer in between outings. It was nice to have people who cared about you.

******

Billy Russo had watched as you left the club, making a careful mental note of your appearance, scent, and the feel of your power. Instinct told him that you might be something special. Something he should find and hold onto. Hopefully something he could use to deal with Rawlins.

Series List

#the punisher #billy russo x reader #matt murdock #magic #karen page #frank castle #witch!reader #daredevil

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zachsreaderinserts · 4 years ago

Text

sleepy boys inc x gn!teen! reader headcannons

trying something new! i like bbs and all, but i wanted to write for other youtubers! lemme know if yall wanna see more content like this lol.

this takes place in a minecraft au!!! also, mentions of bad parenting/abusive parents

wc: 2,319

okay the sleepy boys

chaos incarnated, all of them. you can’t deny it

so, when tommy invites a friend from a local village, at first, everyone else is skeptical. since when has tommy made a friend who didn’t hate him within 20 minutes from all the screaming and insults he spewed?

unlike his friends, phil is more excited than anything. though he isn’t tommy’s dad, he feels like it sometimes, so he really wants to meet this new person who has caught the youngest’s attention

techno is very much not on board. he has a hard time trusting people at first glance and having been friends with tommy for the longest, he knows that tommy readily jumps the gun and attempts to befriend literally anything just because he can

and wilbur? indifferent for the most part. yes, he feels the need to make sure tommy is protected and cared for, but he also recognizes that this situation is out of his hands. the best he can do is hope that their friend isn’t an absolute asshole

so, it’s saturday. all three men are sitting on the couch in phil’s cottage, talking amongst themselves as they wait for tommy to come back. techno makes a joke about murdering them, which leads to phil scolding him about his violent tendencies

“you haven’t even met them yet, techno, what the fuck.”

wilbur is simply adding fuel to the fire, making little remarks here and there and watching the whole thing escalate to phil lecturing the piglin hybrid.

because of this, not one of them had noticed that tommy returned, with his newest friend. they both stopped at the sight of phil in dad mode, tommy considering just turning around and taking his friend as far away as physically possible

too late, since techno’s sixth sense made him whip around and stare at the newcomer. this made phil stop lecturing and wilbur quit giggling long enough for tommy to introduce his friend

after saying their name, the friend lifted their hand shyly, face burning from slight embarrassment. their other hand was latched onto tommy’s, feeling intimidated.

can you blame them? the fucking blood god looks like they wanna skewer them and cook them over a campfire.

tommy took notice of their shyness and cleared his throat, “we were planning on going to the carnival in their village if you three assholes feel like tagging along.”

like there was any way they were gonna let tommy and his friend go out without chaperones.

tommy turned back to his friend, “give me a second, i’m gonna go grab my sword just in case.” and proceeded to run up the stairs and towards the guest bedroom in phil’s house that he claimed.

the millisecond he was out of earshot, techno grabbed his friend by the front of the shirt.

“what are your intentions with tommy?”

the friend blinked once, twice, then bit back a smile. “you’re asking that as if i’m about to date that motherfucker.”

this time, it was wilbur who bit back a grin of his own. who would’ve expected the originally shy kid to have replied like that????

techno’s brain short circuited and his grip on their shirt loosened slightly. did.... did this kid just brush off his question???

“can you put me down? you’re gonna stretch my shirt.”

techno’s brain blinked back into focus and he gripped the kid’s shirt harder, shoving them against the nearest wall. “i asked a question, kid.”

“you know, tommy told me something like this would happen. i’m glad i came prepared.” and then, tommy’s friend sucked in a deep breath. techno leaned back, expecting the worst...

“MWISTER TECHNWOBWADE, PWEASE PUT MWE DOWN BEFWORE I SCWEAM”

oh god, this was far worse than anything he thought of.

he dropped the teen out of disgust more than anything, reeling backwards. if there was one thing that haunted his dreams, it was uwu-speak.

phil started howling of laughter, clutching his stomach and hunching over. originally he was going to stop techno from threatening a literal child but this outcome was so much better than anything he was anticipating

wilbur was no better, already tearing up from how hard he was snickering. he started choking on his own spit at one point, smacking his arm against the couch.

tommy was so fucking confused when he came back down the stairs, seeing the mayhem that was, for once, not caused by him. he glanced at his friend, who had the world’s biggest shiteating grin.

yeah, they were gonna fit in just fine.

and they did! phil took them under his wing (both physically and metaphorically) and allowed them to come visit his home whenever they wished. and whenever they did, phil was the first to ask how they’ve been and what they were up to

to phil’s surprise, the kid was overall calm in their choice of activities. things like playing soccer or drawing or figuring out how to learn instruments in their free time. it seemed like they were desperate to get their hands on anything and everything just to learn

he found it funny, though, when their chaotic side shone through. they easily were on tommy’s level when they got into that headspace and it was so hilarious to him.

his favorite memory of the kid was when they walked into the house and marched right up to where techno was reading idly in the corner. planting their hands on their hips, they spoke.

“if you were to fuck a clone of yourself, would it be masturbation or would you be considered gay?”

phil, who was washing the dishes six feet away from them, just about crumbled into a ball on the floor from how hard he was laughing and sobbing.

of all questions, that was the one that came out.

but he had no idea that the chaos was a coping mechanism. he just thought they were naturally like that in their free time.

he soon found out the truth when they came home with tommy, who was cursing up a fit, visibly angry. his friend was slumped over, as if trying to hide themselves from the world

when phil asked what had happened, tommy exploded.

“their fucking dad took all their money from their savings! said he needed it more than them and when they asked for it back, he called them a fucking disappointment! that fucking bitch--”

phil can count very few times when he felt true anger and he can confirm that when tommy had told him what had gone down, he saw red.

but he knew better than to outwardly show it. judging by how hunched over and defeated the kid was, what they needed was a stable support system

so he walked over and shut tommy up with a hand on his shoulder, “why don’t we take the rest of the night to build up that game room you wanted in the basement. i’m sure if we knock it out before techno and wil are supposed to be back, we can all play something like monopoly.”

seeing where phil was headed, tommy nodded and brushed away his anger. he knew that what his friend needed was a serious cheering up. tommy ran towards his guest bedroom, claiming that he was going to find his blocks.

phil crouched in front of the teen, tilting their head up to look him in the eyes. “you’re not a disappointment. you’re an amazing person with a chaotic joke machine going 120 kilos over the speed limit in your head and you are talented. your dad doesn’t know shit about what you’re capable of doing.”

oh boy, the kid’s crying. those are tears, full on tears.

that night was one of the best nights of their life, however. they enjoyed the entire three hour long game of monopoly where they watched the light leave everyone’s eyes. it was funny when wilbur lunged across the table when he landed on a railroad, out for phil’s blood.

speaking of wilbur, he enjoyed every minute in the kid’s presence. they often asked creative and random questions and went along with the abstract jokes he made, the two of them laughing heartily the entire time.

when the kid first mentioned wanting to learn how to play the guitar, he practically burst through the wall of the room next door, breathing heavily and exaggeratedly.

“did someone say guitar”

yeah, he’s feral. that’s canon.

they proceeded to spend the entire day in phil’s garden, each of them equipped with a guitar. despite their outwardly smooth brain and stupid demeanor, the teen was a fast learner and could play the most basic chords by the time the sun was setting.

wilbur’s favorite moment was the first night they met, when they went to the carnival. there was the game where you shoot the water and fill up the balloons and the kid was going head to head against techno and tommy.

it was when techno won that the teen turned to techno with murder in their eyes and spoke in a deadpan tone of voice,

“you’re lucky you won this time, you gentrified mayo monkey.”

wilbur’s jaw dropped, as did techno and phil’s. tommy was already in hysterics, smacking his hand against the counter that held the guns.

needless to say, wilbur found his favorite, not-quite sibling in a heartbeat.

techno was the last to come around with the child. can you blame him? every time he tried to threaten them or had beaten them at something, they would respond in a cryptic threat--

“i’m going to pee your pants if you don’t let me win”

or just brushed him off. without a second thought.

“anyways, i was murdering a chicken the other day, and the fucker had the audacity to ribbit at me.”

to say he was confused was an understatement. he was terrified of the fact that a literal child held so much power and disinterest in things like their own life. so for the first few months, he avoided them.

but he had seen past that when it was around midnight on a weekday. tommy was hanging out with tubbo and ranboo in their village miles away from the area. wilbur was out drinking with schlatt, niki, and fundy, and phil was already asleep.

techno wasn’t too far behind, sitting in front of the fireplace and staring out of the window that showed the front yard. it was only then when he saw the flash of a familiar face and looked closer as the teen walked up to the house quietly. their head was down and they carried a small bag with them.

techno opened the front door with a long creak as they reached the porch steps. it was only when they jumped and looked up in surprise that techno had noticed a deep bruise on their left cheek in the moonlight.

despite the fact that he kept away from them, techno was very protective and territorial of tommy, phil, and wilbur. and since they were attached to the teen, he became protective of them as well.

so all the voices in his head went quiet for a second. before exploding into a mixture of screams and threats, all leading back to protecting the child in front of him.

without thinking, he reached forward and cupped their face for a better view of the bruise. at the warm and soft touch, tears slipped down the kid’s cheeks and they sniffed pathetically.

the voices quickly took a 180, all screaming to take care of them. make them feel better. so, techno led the kid inside and let them spend the night in his room, with them falling asleep on the bed and him falling asleep on the rocking chair in his room.

phil did not hesitate to officially declare himself as the teen’s official father, saying that their biological father was a “little bitch”

now somewhat living with the teen, techno found an appreciation for their quieter moments, when they were reading or simply daydreaming. it was cute, in his eyes. but he also grew to enjoy when they were absolutely feral, especially toward tommy.

his favorite moment with them was when they had gifted tommy a music disc for his birthday. it was sweet and sentimental and tommy just about burst into tears when he saw it.

all of the sappiness quickly vanished when tommy put it into a jukebox.

“FUCK THIS PUSSY, BOY, FUCK. FUCK IT RIGHT, BOY--”

tommy had let out the most terrified scream and it practically engrained itself into techno’s brain. it was the first time he ever laughed at something the teen had done and the teen felt proud of themselves.

and finally, tommy. he was already happy to call himself a friend of the teen’s. they were like peas in a pod, working together.

tommy came to them when his insecurity felt heavy and they came to him whenever their dad’s words got to them. they had a nice system of dependency on one another and neither of them would trade it for the world.

tommy’s favorite moment of being friends with them was during their first birthday living in phil’s house. it was a birthday befitting their personality, with brightly color streamers hung and confetti all over the floor. he knew that they enjoyed it severely and once the cake was cut, the kid turned to phil.

“phil, where’s the big tiddy strippers i requested?”

tommy was GONE

he all but choked on his slice of cake and walked away, shaking his head while trying to stifle his giggles. but when he heard phil’s scream of “WHAT”, he just lost it.

all in all, his friend had made a fine part of the sleepy boys. they were a happy face in an otherwise somewhat bleak and dangerous world. and all four men appreciated it.

#sleepy boys x reader #sleepy bois x reader #sleepy bois inc #sleepy boys inc #sbi x reader #x reader #reader insert #teen! reader #mcyt x reader #minecraft youtubers #minecraft youtubers x reader #dreamsmp x reader

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moonstrider9904 · 2 years ago

Text

Caretaker

Chapter 4 of Moonlight

{series masterlist} | {next chapter} {previous chapter}

{crossposted to AO3}

Series summary: Not even Clair, with her promising quiet life as the owner of a small restaurant on Naboo, could escape the war after her restaurant is destroyed in a strange, terrorist-like event. Left with nothing, she is taken in by a squad of four clone troopers who are all very protective of her, particularly the team’s sarcastic, arrogant sniper, who battles to maintain his tough exterior as sweet Clair slowly crawls her way into him.

Chapter summary: Crosshair continues trying to suppress his feelings for Clair even if it'll ultimately get the better of him, and the two find themselves in an unforeseen opportunity to bond over Clair's love for cooking.

Warnings/tags: There is angst in this chapter as well as alcohol use and some swearing, but there is also fluff and bonding. There are mentions of death and loss as well. Lots of that Soft!Crosshair we all love!

Word count: 7.6k

Playlist: spells to fall asleep, opus 2

Even before his eyes opened, he’d already been repeating to himself that he couldn’t let that happen again. He remembered Clair’s smile from the night before, and the last thing he could to do her was give her hope.

A somber wave of dread fell over Crosshair as he sat up on his bunk, rubbing his eyes to release some of the tension he still had. He flinched when he picked up on the muffled sound of one of Clair’s giggles coming from the main hall of the Marauder, all while he remained seating and isolated in his own room. He scowled at himself. He’d led her too far on, now he’d have to take more distance from her than before. Whatever, he figured, she’d be happy with spending time with Tech and Wrecker. Those two would keep her so occupied, she wouldn’t even have time to bother thinking of him. That would be fine for him so long as it meant Clair wouldn’t grieve on his account.

A loud knock on his door snapped Crosshair out of his thoughts, and right after that he heard Wrecker’s voice coming from outside.

“Last call for breakfast, ram’ser! You don’t come out here, I’m gonna eat it all.”

“I’m coming,” Crosshair snarled. He stood up and didn’t even change out of the plain shirt and pants he’d used to sleep; he’d step into the refresher once he had caf in his system. As he walked down the hall towards the Marauder’s cockpit, he filled himself of determination.

But Clair’s big eyes made it difficult to not pay attention to her. As soon as he stepped into the cockpit where everyone was gathered around the rations they had left, her gaze landed on him and her smile brightened. What caught him off guard was the unusual scent that filled the air—it wasn’t caf like they were used to whenever they had mornings off. The scent was natural, earthy, and he later picked up on the touch of honey that lingered with it.

“Clair made tea!” Wrecker called out with excitement as he refilled his cup. “It’s so good!”

If Crosshair could have had it his way, he wouldn’t have made anything of it, but it wouldn’t be possible. Clair was already approaching him with a cup in hand, and he felt a pang in his chest when he realized that cup wasn’t hers. Her smile was caring and charming and her eyes sparkled when she looked up at him. She had every ounce of goodness and welfare and, Crosshair feared, even love in her gaze.

“I was up early and I went out to forage for some herbs,” she told him. “I figured you’d all like it. And I even found some honey that you had stored! It goes incredibly well with this blend.”

Clair put the cup in his hands before he could even know how to react. He remained speechless, but he knew Clair was expecting some sort of a reaction. However, she only figured he was shy around his brothers, so she resorted to prompting him just a bit further.

“And, uh… I wanted to thank you again for last night,” she said quietly so that Tech and Wrecker wouldn’t hear while they talked with each other. “It really helped me clear my mind and I slept really well afterwards. How’d you sleep?”

“Fine,” Crosshair told her as he turned and went around her to head to the ration box. He’d made the attempt to not be too aggressive in his movements, but the gesture was still unquestionably rude, and he could feel Clair’s gaze on him as he purposefully turned his back on her.

She was confused, to say the least. She wasn’t one to do things expecting the other would return the gesture, but she figured that after the previous night, she and Crosshair would talk more. He’d said himself he didn’t hate her, and she grew sad thinking what the problem might have been. Maybe she said something that triggered Crosshair, but what could it have been?

Her eyes landed on Hunter, who was already looking at her sympathetically. He gave her a reassuring smile in hopes he could at least convey the message Crosshair was only cranky because he’d just woken up. Clair tried pushing it aside, even though deep down it still bothered her. Meanwhile, Hunter tried to catch Crosshair’s gaze, but he’d only find out Crosshair was evading him as well. After the conversation Hunter had with him the previous night, it seemed obvious why. Crosshair had tried something he regretted, and now he was going to back off again.

Clair was still trying to figure Crosshair out when she felt one of Wrecker’s affectionate taps that made her snap out of it.

“Sorry, what?”

Wrecker chuckled at her. “I said you should come to the village marketplace with me and Tech.”

“I’m sure we’re all in the mood for something other than rations and it would be nice to purchase something more edible,” Tech said. “Besides, I’ve been reading up on this planet’s customs and it seems it’ll make for a nice evening out.”

“Evening?” Wrecker protested. “That wasn’t part of the deal. I want to go there now!”

“I’m sure you do, but the way the locals work makes mornings exclusively dedicated to setting up the business when it comes to the food market. If we go now, we’ll be met with stale food and leftovers that the locals would much rather repurpose rather than consume. It is simply the way their economy works, and I must say it’s rather interesting. I don’t see it much in other planets.”

“Okay, Tech—” Wrecker grasped Tech’s shoulders firmly. “Look at me. Small words, buddy.”

“If we go now, food no be yummy. Food be bad. Wrecker no like.”

“Ooooh, I see—hey!” Wrecker shoved Tech once he realized what his brother was doing.

Clair couldn’t help but laugh at the way Tech and Wrecker got along. From the corner of her eye, she even saw Crosshair curving his lips in a nearly imperceptible smile as he witnessed the scene as well. That gesture gave Clair the slightest bit of hope, and she decided maybe including the Batch as a whole would be a better way to Crosshair’s good side.

“We’ll all go, right?” Clair proposed.

“It would certainly be nice if we all went together,” Tech replied. “Unless of course, anyone has other plans they’ll have to attend during the evening.”

“I want to hunt,” Crosshair said, his voice blunt.

“You won’t be able to do much of that,” Tech said. “Hunting is prohibited for civilians, and not even your status as a soldier of the Grand Army of the Republic will allow you. Only those in the food market are permitted to do it.”

“Then I’ll fish.”

“Not many edible fish in this lake,” Tech countered. “I studied the water at sunrise and its conditions foster various species of small fish, many of them too small to even bother eating and some of them even poisonous. They’re not worth the effort, unless you wish to make some sort of gourmet dish, that is.”

“Then I’ll hike and catch bugs,” Crosshair said dismissively.

“Funny you should mention that,” Hunter cut in with his low tone. “I was planning on a hike as well. Come with me, I won’t bother you.”

Crosshair didn’t seem happy, but then, he never did. Not the way he was at night under the ethereal moonlight, as Clair remembered the scene vividly. She remembered the way his lips had curved; it was so real there was no way she could have dreamt it. Still, she felt herself relax when she saw Crosshair nodding at Hunter and no more snarky comments escaped him.

“Clair,” Tech caught her attention. “Perhaps while they’re off hiking, you’d like to come with me to forage for more plants? There won’t be a problem if we pick them responsibly.”

“I’d love that,” Clair said, but then turned back at Hunter. “You’ll be back before we go to the market, right?”

Hunter addressed her with a gentle smile before Crosshair could do anything. “I’m sure we will, but we’ll probably be too tired to go to the market afterwards.”

A part of Clair wanted to go with them, if only to figure out the mystery that Crosshair had become to her, but somehow she felt it wouldn’t be a good idea. If she proposed it, Tech and Wrecker would tag along, and she had the gut feeling that letting Crosshair have his space would be a good idea. Maybe the night before that, he’d only tried to like her. Maybe he wound up not liking her after all, and though Clair didn’t understand it, she’d try to respect it.

However, once everything was settled, Crosshair made his way past Hunter and back into the hall of the Marauder.

“I’ll hit the refresher,” Crosshair told Hunter quietly.

“Please do,” Hunter replied with a devious grin, only for Crosshair to lightly shove him in response.

The sharpshooter walked off without addressing anyone else, and Clair couldn’t help but follow him with her gaze. As he went further into the ship, she noticed Crosshair had never let go of the cup of tea she gave him, and she then caught a glimpse of him bringing the cup up to his lips to take a drink of it.

For the time being, Clair was fine with settling for that.

The sun shone beautifully that day. Hunter and Crosshair had left early for their hike, leaving Clair with Wrecker and Tech to wander about in the nearby forest after they’d all freshened up. Clair wore a shirt and pants that she’d borrowed from Tech, and his clothes had a relatively loose fit on her since he was so much taller. She’d even had the opportunity to wash her dress and have it dry outside the ship.

Foraging hadn’t taken up most of their time, but she often found herself wondering about Crosshair. Questions of where he was and who he was crossed her mind from time to time. The day was mostly filled with Wrecker and Tech telling her some of their stories from the front lines, as well as several educational explanations from Tech on almost anything they encountered. Whenever Clair managed to get Crosshair out of her mind, the day could prove to be very nice and easy.

When the sun was beginning to set and Clair, Wrecker, and Tech were in the ship assorting the plants they’d collected, Hunter and Crosshair arrived looking tired, yet peaceful in a way. That only made it more obvious when Crosshair’s eyes hardened upon seeing Clair as she organized the herbs with Tech, and after that he’d barely look in their direction.

Tech caught up on the different reactions from the people around him. He adjusted his goggles and faced Hunter, who seemed in good enough condition to decide. “I take it you won’t accompany us?”

“I think we’re staying,” Hunter said. “I am, at least.”

Tech looked over at Crosshair, who merely shook his head in response.

“I hope you weren’t waiting for us,” Hunter said.

“Don’t worry, we wanted to organize these plants before leaving. It won’t be long now.”

“How was your hike?” Clair asked Hunter.

“Peaceful,” he answered. “This spot has a really good variety of places to explore. Though Crosshair sat down and looked out at the lake most of the time.”

Clair wouldn’t allow herself to look at the sharpshooter, not when Hunter’s words had sparked the memory of the night before when Crosshair had also been observing the lake.

“Is that the time?” Tech cut in. “We should probably head to the marketplace now. Over the next couple of hours will be the finest time to visit, and afterwards the businesses will begin to close down.”

“Well then, let’s go!” Wrecker beamed with excitement and held his arm out for Clair. “May I escort you, milady?”

She linked arms with Wrecker with the best spirits she could muster, only turning back to wave goodbye at Hunter and Crosshair. Still to her shock, although she later realized she shouldn’t have been surprised, Crosshair had already disappeared into the Marauder. Hunter could pick up on her disappointment, so he directed her an apologetic look before she and Wrecker exited the Marauder, followed by Tech.

It didn’t take them long to arrive in the village; they could see its light gleaming from quite a distance as the sun continued to go down, bringing back the night sky Clair had fallen in love with. As they were arriving at the village, Clair could make out the figure of the moon rising between the trees. It reminded her painfully of the night before, so she beckoned herself not to look at it.

Focusing on the village became easier the closer they got to it. Still with her arm linked to Wrecker’s, the sight of it was enough to lift her spirits by a lot. People of all ages were going about as if there were no war in the galaxy. Tech led them towards the main marketplace of the village while Wrecker and Clair gawked at the lovely village.

The beautiful mix of scents was the first thing that caught their attention, announcing that they’d finally arrived. The village was lovely as it was, but the ambience of the marketplace was almost carnival-like. Chains of fairy lights between the lamp posts decorated the upper parts and every food stand and business was colorful and inviting. There was so much variety in the things sold in the marketplace, as was reflected by the cocktail of smells, and Clair’s heart began to flutter when she picked up on the scent of freshly baked bread.

Like a child, Wrecker let go of Clair’s arm to instead tug on her hand, practically dragging her towards the first stand he could find. It sold several treats cooked up on the moment; they could either be friend and salty or cool and sweet, and Wrecker was having a blast merely looking at them.

“I hope he doesn’t drool,” Tech whispered to Clair as they watched him.

“Let’s have some faith in the big baby,” Clair said, unable to hide her laugh. Deep down, she figured Wrecker would drool at some point of the evening. “I’d be more worried about him being mistaken for our son.”

“Seriously?”

“Look at him go,” Clair proved her point when Wrecker practically skipped to the next post, gasping loudly at the cuts of meat being grilled.

Wrecker turned around with a leap. “Can we get one of these?! Please?!”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right. He does have my face, after all,” Tech finally agreed with you.

“My thoughts exactly,” Clair giggled as she and Tech approached Wrecker, who had already ordered a drumstick for himself.

“We should determine what exactly we’ll purchase,” Tech said as he looked at his calculations for credits on his holopad.

“One of each!” Wrecker proposed happily.

“We have neither the money nor the room for one of each. Plus, it would be the opposite of practical since we are a squad.”

“I’d love some fresh fruit and spices,” Clair told Tech. “And perhaps a few things to embellish ordinary rations.”

“Excellent idea,” Tech put his holopad in one of his large pouches. “I was also going to suggest getting you any supplies you may need for baking.”

Clair was a bit taken aback, but not negatively. “Wait, are you serious?”

“Why not? You’re the one who knows her way around food, and I’m sure it will make you feel better to do something you love.”

“What do you mean?”

Tech looked at her with understanding. “You know what I mean.”

Clair sighed. She should have known it wouldn’t get past the others, no matter how carefree they seemed.

“You’ve gone through some very intense stuff only to be met with his distant behavior,” Tech said. “Don’t take it personal, he’s that way with everyone.”

“That’s the thing…” Clair was about to tell Tech about what had happened with Crosshair, even if it hadn’t been much, but she hesitated. “I kind of…”

Tech’s eyes prompted her to keep going, but instead Clair sighed and paid no more attention to it.

“Thanks,” she told him. “But I’m fine, really.”

Tech nodded at her. He clearly wasn’t satisfied with her response, but he wouldn’t force her to talk either. “So, what do we need besides the regular flour, eggs, and butter?”

“Oh, don’t worry about it now,” she said. “As soon as we find a place that sells the supplies, I’ll know what to pick up.”

“Are you certain?”

“Tech, I know each of my recipes like the back of my hand,” she told him proudly. “How about we go get that fruit I was telling you about and we’ll pick it up from there?”

“Sounds ideal,” Tech answered just as Wrecker walked up to them, already gobbling up the drumstick he’d ordered with another two in his other hand, all of them clearly for him.

“What gives?” He spoke with a full mouth. “Aren’t you guys getting anything now? We came here to have a good time, it’s not all business!”

“I suppose I could really use some dumplings,” Clair said as she eyed one of the stands down the street. “What do you think, Tech?”

“Dumplings sound amazing.”

They headed to the stand Clair had pinpointed as they enjoyed the overall scenery of the market. As Wrecker enjoyed his remaining two drumsticks, Tech and Clair enjoyed a delicious batch of dumplings each. The filling was delicious as it had vegetables along with a creamy cheese that was embellished with a fine blend of spices. Clair recognized a few of them and she loved it so much that she promised herself to include a recipe like that the next time she set up her restaurant.

If she ever could, of course.

Just as they were finishing up their food to go and buy the supplies they’d already planned, the tiny comm device that Tech had given to Clair for precautions began to beep. She picked it up for Tech and Wrecker to hear as well, just in case it was something important, but the other end of the line greeted them with sounds of shifting and even a couple of impacts.

“Hello?” Clair finally spoke into the comm.

“Sorry!” It was Hunter’s voice. “Pocket dial.”

And then the line was cut off, leaving Clair to exchange looks with the two clones who’d gone with her.

“That was strange,” Tech commented.

“I’m sure pocket dials are fairly normal,” Clair told him.

“Right,” Tech replied with skepticism. “Anyway, shall we go get the rest?”

“Sure!” Clair said, already feeling much better than before.

While Tech and Clair focused on getting fruits, including some of her favorite berries, as well as spices and even some veggies, Wrecker took it upon himself to pick up more snacks and treats for the whole squad to indulge in over the course of the night and the following morning. They’d made pretty good time already, and while Clair paid the last few spices, Tech located the next stand they’d go to. He led Clair to a small shop that had almost everything she could dream of: baking molds, utensils, sheets, decorative supplies, as well as all the essential ingredients for baking and a few others that weren’t so common.

“How did you know this was here?” Clair questioned with gleaming eyes.

“I merely looked it up,” Tech told her. “Now go on, pick up whatever you need.”

Clair pranced around the shop with an excitement that was so pure, anyone who laid eyes on her would want to pick her up and protect her. As Clair had pointed out before, she knew exactly what to pick up and how much of it, and it was amazing to Tech how she knew it like the back of her hand. She was off in her own little world, and in no time, the basket she had was filling up. When she was ready, she gestured to Tech and Wrecker, who went fully into the store to make the purchase.

At the front counter was an old lady with bronze skin marked by wrinkles and expression lines. Her hair was still very voluptuous, but it was almost completely gray except for a few black strands. Her eyes were kind and unbelievably soft, as Tech and Wrecker perceived it, since they’d expected someone so old to be hardened by time and the difficulties the Galaxy had gone through with the war.

“Will that be all, young lady?” She spoke, not removing her eyes from Clair.

“Yes, thank you.”

The lady began to register the items. “I’ve never seen you around here, but you seem to know what you’re doing.”

“We’re just passing through, actually,” Clair said.

“You’re a baker?”

“Baker, chef, brewer,” Clair smiled shyly. “Cooking has been my whole life.”

Still with kindness, the old lady raised an eyebrow as she scanned the two men behind Clair. “Then why are you hanging out with soldiers, girl?”

Clair chuckled faintly. “I’m… actually sort of a refugee. It’s complicated. The war forced me to displace and these guys are helping me find a new place to settle in, one where I could set up a restaurant like I already had.”

The lady’s eyes lit up. “You had your own restaurant? At your age? What an achievement!”

“Thank you!” Clair smiled and looked around the shop. “Are you a baker too?”

“Retired,” said she. “The old bakery is still set up at the back, but it never gets used anymore. My daughter used to, but then she went off to study as a medic to prepare for the great war.”

“Surely she’ll enjoy it when she returns,” Clair said hopefully.

But the lady’s eyes softened and she exhaled. “I’m afraid she won’t. She died in service.”

Clair’s heart dropped. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“My dear, you had no way of knowing!” To Clair’s surprise, the old lady was beaming with kindness. “Besides, I know my dear child helped countless others. Besides, that was long ago, and I have learned to make my peace with it.”

“How could you ever do it?” Clair inquired.

The lady leaned in with a hint of mischief in her eyes. “It took about three-dozen berry pies, countless pots of tea, a whole lot of self-care and healing. But really, my child, the best aid was time.”

“Really?” Clair said, just a bit disheartened.

“Time is the only thing we have, dear. With time, we always know what to do when it comes to us.”

Her reflection made Clair feel a subtle wave of peace. Gazing at this woman’s eyes, Clair was sure she knew what she was talking about. Just then, the kind woman finished registering all the items, leaving for Tech to pay the amount in credits. The lady secured them and gazed at Clair again before they left.

“How long will you stay here?”

“At least another day,” Tech answered. “Perhaps two, if we have the opportunity.”

The woman nodded at Tech and looked at Clair once more. “Come here tomorrow. Use my bakery to create whatever you wish. I’m sure you plan on putting all those ingredients to use.”

“I-I wouldn’t want to make trouble.”

“It won’t be trouble, dear. I’ll be out tomorrow to meet with providers and the shop will be closed, but I always leave a key under the tallest lavender plant. Please, use the bakery. Make something delicious to share with your friends. I feel like you could use it.”

Clair couldn’t find the words to express how touched she felt. The gesture was unexpected, but it was one of the kindest things anyone had ever done for her.

“I… I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know your name!”

“Call me Mora, dear. And how may I call you?”

“Clair,” she said with a smile.

“Well, do you accept my offer, Clair? I’m sure the old bakery would love someone so spirited and experienced to create in it.”

Clair looked over at Tech and Wrecker, who both smiled at her in encouragement. The idea of cooking and baking again had already made Clair happy, but to do it in a space that was actually meant for it would just about make her day. She turned around and faced Mora again.

“I’d be happy to,” she smiled.

Mora clasped her hands together with a big grin. “Excellent! Everything will be ready when you arrive tomorrow. Remember, the key is under the big lavender plant.”

“I won’t forget. Thank you so much, I promise to leave the place spotless afterwards.”

“I trust you’ll do wonderfully,” Mora told her.

With a few more warm waves and goodbyes, Clair made her way outside of the shop followed by Tech and Wrecker, and the three of them walked down the street feeling a wave of brightness that wasn’t all that common for them.

“Well, that was surely very nice,” Tech broke the silence.

“I never expected it to happen, but it was!” Clair said, the excitement still very notable in her voice. “At what time would it be good to come back here tomorrow?”

“I believe you’ll know that better than I will,” said Tech. “Any thoughts on what you’re going to make?”

“Well, it’s funny that she mentioned berry pies. I was already planning on making one.”

“Sweet,” Wrecker said, already savoring the pie Clair would make.

With the conversation following along those lines, the trio made their way back to the Marauder.

Crosshair and Hunter had taken turns in the refresher upon returning from their hike once Clair and the others had left. The sniper hadn’t said much during the hike, but that much was normal. Hunter had tried to get Crosshair comfortable enough so that maybe he’d open up again, but it didn’t happen, and he figured it simply wouldn’t. With that, Hunter retreated into his cot to calm down his senses, still tired from being outdoors all day.

That left most of the ship free for Crosshair. There was something oddly comforting in the silence, but he couldn’t bring himself to be alone in the cockpit. He’d been thinking of her the entire damn day.

He knew what he was doing. He wasn’t overwhelmed with uncertainty anymore, now it was simply the fact that he knew he was being a jerk to her. Crosshair wasn’t a stranger to being a prick to people he didn’t like, it was actually something he enjoyed. But Clair didn’t deserve it, and he liked her too much for his own good, and that fact wouldn’t leave him alone no matter how much he tried to shove it away. And what was even worse was that he was sure he’d hurt her earlier. He was hurting her. He’d been tense for too long, and he knew that’d at least screw up his aim the next time he grabbed his rifle.

In another effort to calm down, Crosshair went over to where the squad stored their rations and rummaged through the back to find a nice new bottle of Corellian Whisky. He opened it up and poured himself a glass filling it almost to the brink, and he didn’t even bother to put ice in it. He went to sit in front of one of the holopanels and stared at the blue light, letting the smokey taste of the whisky calm his nerves.

Much to his disgust, it calmed his nerves and he was no longer tense, but his thoughts of Clair only increased. Similar to the previous night, after he’d sat out with her in the moonlight, he could only see her smile, hear her laugh. The one thing that made it worse was the newer memory of her walking up to him with that cup of tea that she’d brewed herself. It was a gesture of her gratitude, not only to the squad, but to him. It was one of the kindest things anyone had ever done for him and all he did was go around her and not even bother to look at her for the rest of the day.

He gulped down another glass of whisky and set it down on the holopanel with a thud after he lost track of how many he’d had. His mind continued to dwell on the various images of Clair, not even able to form concrete sentences in his mind other than the fact that the tea she’d made him was the best damn thing he’d ever tasted.

His head was light and he could barely keep his eyes open, and it took him too long to realize his vision had blurred. He tightly shut his eyes and brought a hand to the bridge of his nose only to feel the warm wetness dripping from the corners of his eyes, and at last, he admitted to himself he was weaker than he’d ever been, and all because he’d been wrong.

“Crosshair?”

The sniper didn’t react much to his name. However, seeing him like this made Hunter worried, and he went over and sat in front of Crosshair. He took the empty glass from his brother’s hand and glanced at the bottle to see it was only about half full, and it was then that he caught up on Crosshair’s tears. Hunter hurried to get the alcohol away from Crosshair and he tightly grasped his brother’s wrist.

“Crosshair, please look at me.”

“Go away. I don’t want another lecture.”

“I won’t lecture you,” Hunter said, even though he did plan on doing it. “Just look at me.”

Crosshair’s narrow eyes were sadder than Hunter had ever seen them, but they finally met his.

“You’re right,” Crosshair muttered to then grimace in disappointment. “I’ve been an idiot, haven’t I?”

“You’re allowed to make mistakes,” Hunter said calmly. “And you had her best interest in mind. You were selfless.”

A brief moment of silence engulfed the two brothers.

“But look at what it’s doing to you, man,” Hunter continued. “This can’t go on.”

“If this isn’t the right way, then what is?” Crosshair questioned, not as a challenge to Hunter like it usually was. Crosshair really wanted to know, deep down.

“Look, you don’t have to date her,” Hunter said. “But at least talk to her. Be nice to her, talk to each other. I promise you, it’ll be better than what’s happening now.”

Crosshair didn’t look Hunter in the eyes anymore. His eyes instead drifted over the ground, not really focusing on her.

“I…” He spoke quieter than ever. “I want to date her. I want to hold her… I want to squeeze her, protect her…” More tears ran down his cheeks. “I was out with her last night and you have no idea how much I just wanted to kiss her…”

Hunter gently held Crosshair’s shoulder until his youngest brother finally decided to look him in the eyes.

“Cross… if that’s what you want, then get it. You deserve it. Forget the fears, fuck them. You go get that girl, alright?”

Crosshair took a deep breath and slowly sat up. He fumbled around the controls of the holopanel where he’d left his comm device, and slowly he began to turn it on.

“What are you doing?” Hunter asked.

“Calling her.”

“Wait, not now!”

Just as Crosshair called, Hunter managed to snatch it away from him. Luckily, Crosshair wasn’t aggressive when he was drunk, and he just sulked back in his chair.

“Hello?” Clair answered through the comm. Hunter could notice the way Crosshair flinched at the sound of her voice.

“Sorry! Pocket dial,” Hunter excused and cut the call to put the comm device far away from Crosshair. He then went back to sit next to his brother again, and the two simply remained in silence for what seemed like forever.

“I don’t know how to go about this, Hunter,” Crosshair admitted after a while.

“I’m sure you’ll know how when the time comes,” Hunter comforted. “So long as you choose not to be rude or to shut her out, it’ll be fine.”

“How can you even be sure?”

“I can sense things, Cross. She feels differently around you. Just trust me, alright?”

Crosshair didn’t say anything more. For well over an hour, Hunter sat there with his brother until he deemed it right to try and sober him up a bit. With lots of water and even some caf, Crosshair was eventually more on the sober side, but his eyes were still red and puffy and he refused to talk.

Hunter put away the whisky and caf, and after that, he went to sit with Crosshair one more time.

“They’ll be back soon,” Hunter said.

Crosshair stood up from the chair. “I don’t want them to see me like this. Say I went to bed, will you?”

Hunter would have liked him to greet Clair, but he also knew Crosshair wasn’t in position to. It would be way better for Crosshair to rest, if he could even get any sleep, so Hunter nodded at his brother. With that, Crosshair retreated into his bedroom and lay sleepless on his bed for hours, hoping the next day would eventually come.

Crosshair managed to get a few hours of sleep despite all the caf he’d had, but his head hurt too much for his own pride and any minor noise would make his ears ring. He wondered for a moment if that’s what Hunter’s hearing felt like, but he dismissed the thought and mustered all his courage to bring himself to the refresher.

Out in the hall, it smelled amazing. There was food, freshly brewed caf, and the sound of his brothers laughing and talking. He did his best to hurry in the refresher and then went over to the cockpit where they were all gathered and took a seat in one of the back chairs.

Clair approached him similar to the day before. He’d expected she wouldn’t want to again after the way he’d dismissed her, but there she was, looking down at him with a soft smile. In her hands, she held a cup of black caf that looked strong, as well as a plate of dumplings dipped in sauce that looked spicy.

Crosshair raised a brow. “Hunter told you, didn’t he?”

Shyly, Clair nodded at him.

Crosshair sighed. “What did he say?”

“Only that you’d had a drink too much. I figured you’d need this,” she handed him the caf and the dumplings.

He eyed the food only to look up at her again. “Did you make these?”

Clair wasn’t expecting him to make any more conversation with her, but she welcomed it with a soft smile. “I only made the sauce. We bought the dumplings last night.”

“Huh. So no tea today?”

“I think you need the caf more than the tea today.” With a soft grin, she went back to where his brothers were. As Crosshair ate the breakfast she’d made for him, he found himself feeling way better from his hangover. It was as if Clair had given him a potion to get rid of it.

“Tech tells me you’re going into the village today to cook,” Hunter told Clair. “Where are you going?”

“We met the kindest lady. Her name is Mora and she offered me to use her old bakery installment to cook whatever I want. Naturally, I accepted.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. I’ve no reason to not trust her. Plus, I really want to cook something we can all eat. Will you guys come?”

“Actually, Hunter offered to take me on a hike,” Tech said. “And I’d love to examine more of this planet’s properties.”

“Wrecker, why don’t you come with us?” Hunter added. “You could use the physical activity.”

Crosshair eyed Hunter, realizing what he was doing. Before the sharpshooter could say anything of it, Hunter finished it off.

“Why don’t you take Crosshair with you?”

“Yeah, he’s barely in condition to walk anyway,” Wrecker mocked.

“Hey,” Clair intervened. “FYI, I made him my special anti-hangover sauce. He’ll be beating you in no time.” Then she turned around to see Crosshair. Her eyes were hopeful, but she still didn’t want to expect a yes from him. “Do you want to come?”

Crosshair briefly hesitated. His instinct was to brush her off, to tell her she was right, he’d be fine in no time and he’d rather hike.

But he didn’t follow that instinct.

“Sure,” he said in a soft tone that surprised everyone on the ship.

“Well then, it’s settled,” Tech said. “We’ll do our thing and meet up for a nice lunch.”

“Perfect,” Clair said with a lovely glint of happiness in her voice.

Before everyone set off to go about their day, Crosshair shot Hunter a look. Hunter smiled softly and went up to his brother and pet his shoulder.

“You’ll know what to do,” Hunter encouraged.

Crosshair wasn’t mad, he was actually quite grateful that Hunter would be such a wingman. He was grateful Hunter stood by him for the couple of hours he’d been drunk and miserable, and he was grateful Clair didn’t hate him even if he was a jerk to her beforehand. Of course, the hard part would be living up to all of that, and he simply hoped he didn’t ruin it again.

The key was indeed underneath the largest lavender plant. There were a few keys on the ring, each one labelled with a tiny piece of white paper and neat handwriting. Clair first had to open up the shop and go through it, closing the door once Crosshair went in, carrying all the stuff she’d bought the day before, and afterwards she went to the very back to open the next door.

It was clean and quiet inside. Clair turned on the lights and the wave of nostalgia instantly hit her like a speeder bike. It reminded her so much of the Allium Cafeteria when she’d be the first one there before the sun even came up, determined to begin baking and arranging everything as her crew gradually arrived. The longing squeezed her heart and she found herself standing in the middle of the kitchen reminiscing about her old home.

Crosshair gently set the supplies down and looked at her. He knew what was happening with her, and while he wasn’t much for words, he went to stand beside her. He towered over Clair’s petite figure and he noticed she’d worn the dress again. Clair looked around the bakery as if coming back to the present moment, and next to the oven was a cute, lavender colored apron with a tiny note on it.

Happy baking!

Clair smiled at the note and she placed it folded neatly inside the pocket of her dress to then put on the apron. The apron smelled of lavender and chocolate chip cookies, and it brought her an odd sense of home even though she’d never had that combination. She then turned around and saw Crosshair still observing her, with eyes more curious as opposed to the hardness she’d grown used to.

He may as well have rushed to her and taken her in his arms. He cursed himself for the thought, but she looked too damn cute in that dress and apron.

“Problem?” He shoved the thought aside before he did anything dumb.

Clair smiled and looked down at the ground. “Just some memories of home.” She looked back at him, wondering what had happened to him between the former morning and that moment. She walked up to where he was and began to take the things out of the bag.

“Anything you want to make?” She asked him.

“You know better than I do. What did you plan?”

“I want to make a pie, but the hard part of that will be the dough. The filling will be berry based, and that one comes out really quickly. As for lunch, well…” She held the pack of uncooked dumpling dough up for Crosshair to see. “The ones they sell at the stands are good, but I think my recipe is better.”

Crosshair took the dumplings from her hands. “How about I make these?”

Clair raised a skeptical eyebrow at him. “Do you know what you’re doing?”

He softly smiled. “I think so.”

“Well, I’ll trust you with it.”

Clair arranged every ingredient she’d need for the pie while Crosshair looked through the ones she’d bought for the dumplings, and from that he could pretty much know what she wanted. In no time, he found the pans he’d need and got started on the filling, then the sauce, while Clair worked on the pie with expertise.

Soon, the smell of the sauce invaded the entire kitchen and Clair turned starstruck towards the stove where Crosshair was cooking. She approached and looked into the pot where he was brewing, and then she looked at him.

“You’re quite the mystery.”

“Meaning?”

She chuckled in disbelief. “I never know how to read you.”

“Not many people do.”

Her eyes drifted over to the pot once more. “May I try?”

Crosshair handed her a small spoonful and Clair blushed a bit when she realized he’d feed it to her. They were close together and everything was silent except for the sound of the sauce simmering, and she looked up with that faint blush as Crosshair offered her the spoonful. Being so close to him made her chest flutter. Still, she allowed herself to try it, and when she did, she was blown away. Her eyes shut and she moaned at how good it was.

“It tastes so good!” She celebrated and looked at Crosshair as though she suddenly didn’t know who he was. “It’s amazing! Where did you learn to cook?”

“I look up how to do it in my free time. I’ve cooked before but don’t always get the chance.”

“Well, you have talent…” She said, still in disbelief.

The two of them looked at each other, both not really knowing what else to say or do. If anything, Clair always loved sharing her love for food with other people but sharing it with Crosshair was doing things to her. Her chest still had that flutter and she felt the butterflies in her stomach, and out of pure nerve, she turned around and got working on the dough once more.

As the time went by, Crosshair and Clair grew more comfortable around the other. When the berry filling was done, she walked up behind him with a spoonful, and this time she fed it to him. He wasn’t as expressive, but he did let her know it was incredible. Clair made a full-sized pie for the whole squad as well as a smaller, simpler pie which she and Crosshair could eat beforehand, simply because she could never resist eating what she baked.

Around the same time, the dumplings were done, and they were Crosshair’s little factor of pride for that day. When both were done, they sat around the counter, each with a batch of dumplings and a slice of pie. Clair was joyous in how delicious both recipes had turned out, and Crosshair found himself genuinely smiling at her happiness. He was also really glad he could finally have a taste of what Clair could cook in its full potential, and the two found themselves enjoying the other’s company like they never imagined they could.

Once they were done, it was time to clean up and take the things back to the Marauder. The two of them did an amazing job leaving Mora’s bakery like brand-new, and Clair left a slice of berry pie on a cute plate with a little note of her own for Mora. Just as they were about to leave, Crosshair and Clair hesitated to go out the door.

Their eyes met heavily. Clair wanted to say something to him, but she didn’t quite know what. She could feel the heat on her cheeks and Crosshair’s gaze made her feel protected rather than observed. Her lips curved in a smile that Crosshair found endearing, and it took every ounce of his self-control not to bend down and kiss her.

“Clair, I…”

Her eyes lit up when he spoke, and he suddenly couldn’t find the words. He couldn’t just out and tell her how he felt for her, he’d ruin everything again. Then, Clair saved him by speaking too.

“We have to do this again,” Clair said softly.

He didn’t say anything, but he let out a smooth chuckle that resonated within Clair’s ears, and she knew then that he agreed. She then set a foot out the door, but she stopped suddenly, feeling like there was still something she needed to do. She looked up at Crosshair again with shy, yet loving eyes. She admitted she wasn’t thinking everything through, but she perked up on her toes and leaned towards Crosshair. He bent down and almost felt himself explode when Clair gently kissed him on the cheek. It was a very quick, very subtle kiss, but one that made her fluster entirely and had Crosshair feeling chills all over.

Still with a cute smile, Clair went outside and waited for Crosshair to join her so she could lock the doors. Leaving the little bakery behind, the two of them made their way down the street, speechless, occasionally smiling at each other, letting that small kiss say everything they hadn’t spoken aloud.

Taglist: @zoeykallus @sageislostinspring @misogirl828 @dangerousstrawberrypie @salaminus @ladykatakuri @whore4rex @morganlefaye13 @seriowan @kimageddon @rain-on-kamino @prozacspice

#moonlight series #moonstrider writes #tbb crosshair #tbb crosshair fanfic #crosshair fanfic #the bad batch #tbb fanfic #tbb fanfiction #crosshair fluff #tbb crosshair fluff

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blueprint-han · 4 years ago

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[Image ID: A black picture with the title “HOW TO SUPPORT FANFICTION AUTHORS” written in bold caps lock, colored with a winter forest picture. End ID.]

Well, this post has been made countless times, but I’m making one too because I’ve seen a lot of people say they’re new to tumblr and don’t know the whole “reblogging is better than liking” rule and other stuff. So without any further ado, here are ways YOU can support the fanfiction authors. Now keep in mind this applies to almost every author out there, not just the stayblr fandom, so if you’re a silent reader (or even if you aren’t), I advise you go through this post. Warning, this is a fairly long post going into detail, so yeah. I still expect you, the readers to read this, and if you’re a writer, feel free to lmk if i’ve written smth wrong or if you want me to add something! ^^

In this post I’ll go into thorough analysis of the pros and cons of each of the methods listed here and how YOU as a reader can show the authors whose fics you read more love and motivate them to produce content.

WARNING; LONG POST! GOES INTO A DECENT AMOUNT OF DETAIL. NOT EDITED, EXCUSE ANY TYPOS.

#1 : LIKING !

I think this is basic common knowledge, and a lot of people tend to do this. When you like the post, the author sees it, you see it, and if the author has their liked posts accessible (which majority of the time they don’t), and if someone deliberately goes to check it, then they see it. See why so many authors say just liking does nothing? Only liking says “Hey, I’m gonna tell you your story is not that good by simply liking it and not sharing it with other people. :D”

♯ PROS:

You’re telling the author that you've read their fic, and either you’ve enjoyed it to a certain extent, or you’re just saving it to read for later.

Likes are seen by you, the author and anyone who has access to your likes (which, most people don’t).

♯ CONS:

If you ONLY like, you’re not really helping the author’s work reach a wide audience because this site isn’t Instagram. Reblogging is the only way people can SEE our works. I’ll cover more on that in the next section.

In a nutshell, liking is good! But you should most likely use it in a combination with the other stuff I’ve listed below, because just the like itself doesn’t really do much in giving the author any feedback or interaction on their fics.

To clear shit up; I’m not talking about those people who don’t read the story or appreciate it in the first place. I’m talking about those who appreciate the fic, like it, but don’t leave any sort of feedback to show that.

#2 : REBLOGGING !

This is SO, SO important. I cannot stress on this enough. Let me explain WHY so many writers stress on reblogging content:

Tumblr’s tag system is inherently fucked up, and has grown more so over the year. I’m not kidding, at first, the fic either used to show up in the tags or it didn’t, but now, sometimes your fic can be REMOVED from the tags because of,,, idk tumblr tag shit. Anyways, as you can see, it’s very demotivating for authors at that point, because the major way for people to find their content and expand their blogs has been blocked.

Due to this reason, tumblr authors need to RELY on you, their followers to help spread their works to a wider audience. Now again, before you get me wrong, I’m not saying you ae forced to rb our works regardless of whether you like them or not. BUT, that being said, if you DO infact like the story, there’s no harm in reblogging, right? By doing this you’re indirectly telling the author — “hey! :D I liked your fic! Which is why I am gonna share it to my followers so they can read it too :D” Trust me, you’re doing nothing but helping the people who produce content for you to read. Seems like a worthy cause to hit the reblog button, right? It’s only a one, or maximum two step procedure.

Leave tags in your reblogs! Trust me, as an author myself and as much as I know from all my author friends, we oft check the tags of your reblogs to see if you found any part amazing or even if you have anything to say about the writing we put so much hard work into. Even a key smash or a “This was so [insert adjective] 🥺” is enough to leave a smile on your authors face.

♯ PROS :

You’re !! Sharing !! Your authors !! Works !! This leads to them getting more recognition, so for the content they’re so graciously providing for free, you’re promoting their blog and helping them expand it.

If the tags are being a shit, which majority of the time they are, then you’re literally making an author’s day by reblogging! You’re showing them that you, a follower and appreciator of their works are willingly sharing their content because it deserves to be seen by more people. Again before any dumb people decide to attack me, i am talking about people who like the fic but don't bother reblogging and are silent/ghost readers. I am not forcing anyone to read anybody’s work.

YOU’RE MAKING YOUR AUTHOR SO HAPPY WHAT MORE REASONS COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT !! 🥺

♯ CONS :

Literally none, because as far as I remember no author is against reblogging of their works. It’s quite literally the way this platform functions. Reblogging is IMPORTANT.

#3 : COMMENTING/SENDING FEEDBACK !

This kind of overlaps with the previous section, but THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT STEP !! When you leave feedback, you are directly giving the author something so much more valuable to them than high follower/note counts or money. Your feedback is literally our serotonin. I kid you not the number of times I’ve received a positive comment and smiled and it has made my day. There’s a reason youtubers (though not the best example, bear with me here because it was the only one I could think of) ask people to subscribe, like and COMMENT. The subscription is like a follow, the like is ofc like a heart, and the comment is equivalent to an rb with comments in the tags.

You might argue and tell me that a comment is basically like an ask so the reblogging step isn’t necessary, but I’m sure 99% of you use YouTube and you know that more comments leads to people’s videos boosted in the stream/trending charts. This is what reblogging does. Reblogging shares the piece with other people like minded, which leads to a boost in reads. You are literally helping your author grow.

It’s quite literally the same thing as youtubers. Youtubers NEED validation to keep their content creation going, so do writers, so do other ccs on this site. This post is however, focused on WRITERS, so keep that in mind.

♯ PROS :

By doing this, you’re giving author valuable feedback! It’s similar to what you do in rbing with tags. Interactivity with their fics boosts their note counts and helps expand their audience, so srsly, now think of it: your one comment is playing such a massive role to help ccs create more content.

Imagine how much of a difference the note counts will be in when every person who simply likes after reading the fic, reblogs, leaves a comment and sends an ask. the note counts would be high on each and every fic, which is validation in itself, but your comments would inspire the writer so much more! Please, don’t skip the commenting part. Even a simple one like: “this is so cute!” is wonderful.

♯ CONS :

Remember, if you’re gonna give constructive criticism (which I’m sure you all are smart enough to know if different from hate), make sure the author is okay with it. Authors need to be in a specific mindset and must be ready to accept criticism, so if you’re gonna give constructive criticism to them when they’re at a low point, it may demotivate them.

Just commenting, instead of reblogging and commenting in the tags/ reblogging and then leaving an ask in their inbox, while it gives validation in plenty, will not lead to the author’s work being spread. Therefore I suggest either reblogging and commenting in the tags or reblog and then leave an ask, or comment under the fic!

!! reminder; I am not saying that if you don’t rb and just leave feedback, your feedback has no value. We authors truly appreciate every bit of feedback, but this post is aimed to help you learn how to interact with and support authors, and make them feel more motivated, because the current scenario of liking and scrolling is taking a toll on their creative abilities. Take it from a person who’s been writing for a year.

#4 : COMMSIONING VIA THEIR KO-FI/OTHER APPS !

Before any of you attack me, let me tell you that this is not a step that is 100% necessary to do. ONLY donate if you can and if you genuinely want to, and if anyone is forcing you to pay for something against your will, you need to get yourself out of there.

Regardless, if an author has a kofi and you’re able to and you want to donate, you definitely should! It’s also a valid form of support.

#5 : ADDING THEM ON REC LISTS/ RECOMMENDING THEM TO REC BLOGS

This is such an underrated option, to be honest. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen my fic was recommended onto some rec list and it’s made me smile so hard. If you like some fics, create a rec list! They’re oft very popular amongst the fans too. Making rec posts is such a great way to share your favorite stories with others.

Rec blogs! I’ve seen a couple going around, and needless to say they are a great way to get someone else to read your favorite author’s work whilst also giving them your own feedback. These blogs oft accept recs via a form or ask box, and they leave your feedback along with their own, or else they’ll oft tag the author in the feedback post, so look! You’re basically helping your author share their fic to many more people, because you’ve given them feedback and a reblog.

♯ PROS :

Validation! Feedback! Reblogs! More exposure! Helping a blog grow! Spreading love! basically a run down of the stuff I’ve said before!

♯ CONS :

Literally no con of this. Unless, a one in a million case, this author says they don’t like receiving feedback/being tagged, and I’m sure NO person has said this before, at least none that I’ve heard of.

#6 : FINAL COMMENTS; MISC !

When an author points out about how the interactivity is drastically reducing, don’t just give them blind apologies. Yes, you feel sorry for not interacting as much, we understand, but rather show that you’ll become a better content consumer through your actions. We need to see that we’re not just throwing words into a void and that people are actually trying to be better content consumers.

Understand the fact that authors don’t get paid for this, and 99% of the time, these authors don’t take commissions either. They’re giving you novel worthy writings for free. Take Percy Jackson: You think the author would have felt motivated to write the subsequent parts, let alone two whole series based off of it if literally no one showed that they were interested? Rick Riordan has sales, he is being paid, there are millions of people and big agencies who provide him feedback. Now take that huge amount and simmer it down to an audience of maybe 10000 people This is what fanfic authors want. They don’t want your money, nor are they telling you to risk your lives for them. All they want is, a reblog, some tags, some feedback, some INTERACTIVITY. A sign that they aren’t throwing fics into the void and that people actually like them, some motivation to continue. Seems fairly easy to throw an rb with some tags, right?

Don’t bother to tell me that we do this for ourselves and we shouldn’t ask for likes and reblogs and feedback, because 1) you are consuming the content that we “write for ourselves” and 2) writers post their content here for interactivity and feedback. We could just not post and write and save our fics in our dungeon drafts for years. But we choose to post to entertain the readers, the consumers. And we aren’t even asking that much in return.

Don’t give me the whole “I’m scared that authors feel that comments are annoying” excuse either because seriously this has been DEBUNKED SO MANY TIMES. Istg, in the nicest way possible, if you still think writers are annoyed by interaction and feedback, after so many posts, long rants have been posted as to how we’re not, then you must truly be living under a rock. There, I said it. Please stop thinking this way, I’ll say it again, AUTHORS ARE NOT ANNOYED OF FEEDBACK, COMMENTS, TAGS, REBLOGS. WE LOVE IT. Saying this is like saying that the audience in a theatre play shouldn’t clap when the play ends because the actors would find it noisy. 🤡

I’ve seen some people saying they have anxiety issues and such, so pls note that I’m not invalidating your condition. If you’re trying to be more interactive, I really appreciate it! If you can’t, that’s fine too. You’re trying.

But for the people who have no reason other than feeling lazy to rb and comment, your lack of interactiveness is not excused. Please. Tumblr is a reblogging site. If you’re gonna consume content like authors are some sort of machines, I encourage you to go get some more perspective.

This site is not Instagram or the satan bird app. Your likes are appreciated but frankly speaking, they do nothing to the author except tell them “Hey i read ur fic but i'm not gonna support u :D” and honestly, that is detrimental to their creative capabilities and mental health.

DON’T FOLLOW AN ACC JUST TO MINDLESS RB THEIR SIGNAL BOOST POSTS AND THEIR REBLOGS OF GIFS AND NOT INTERACT WITH THEIR WRITING AT ALL ! Trust me, authors prefer a lower amount of interactive followers than a high count that doesn’t even give them any feedback. Again your follows are appreciated, but when you’re following, you know the type of content the author creates, so the author expects that the more followers, the more interactivity. These days, this is just becoming the opposite. So don’t do it! If you’re gonna follow to read, interact with their works. I promise, this will make both you and the author happy. A win-win situation.

In conclusion: SUPPORT YOUR FUCKING AUTHORS! THEY ARE NOT MACHINES THAT HAVE NO FEELINGS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR YOU! FICS TAKE DAYS AND DAYS OF PLANNING, PLOTTING, OUTLINING, WRITING, EDITING, MAKING TEASERS. SO JUST SHOW THEM YOU APPRECIATE THEM WITH AN RB. IT’S THE L E A S T YOU CAN DO.

I will be liking this post here written by the lovely @chaninfused and @scriptura-delirus . Please take time to read it because if you weren’t convinced by my arguments, you will see how much frustration we as writers face on a daily basis. Please, just show support. Here is the post by @stayndays about how to get more people to read your work, because it also has a note on reblogging. Please educate yourself, and put an end to this mindless consuming culutre and bring up some interactivity.

If you’ve read this far, I want you to go to two of your favorite authors and leave some feedback in their inbox, and tag me in it (either tag me yourself or ask the author to do so, they won’t mind). Show your writers that our words are taking effect and you are becoming better consumers. I mean it. I’m serious. I want every single one who reads this post to do this. besides valid reasons, if you’re lazy to do this, you’re a part of the problem. PLEASE get more perspective.

Also, feel free to add to this post! I’d love to read your thoughts too, remember to be kind though. And, if I think your rb is somehow contradicting my points and is bringing down the reason I made this post, I will politely ask you to delete your comment, because this post is about being truthful about the harsh reality of tumblr consumers and how we can change it. I’m sure none of you will let it get to that point, though. <3 love you guys. 💓

And, just a reminder, don’t just blindly like this too. Do what I said before, and while I am not forcing you, I’d appreciate your reblog, because seriously, it took me 3 whole days to write this, plus, I’m sure this will help more of your followers understand the fault in consumer culture. haha, that’s it! This post was way too long uff.

also, this is ur cue to not be stupid in my inbox. You have something to say? Think I worded smth wrongly? I’m sure it wasn’t my intention to do so, point it out with manners.

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robinofgothamcity · 4 years ago

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♡ prompt: a kid appears in the past, claiming to be yours.

♡ pairing: jon kent (superboy) x fem reader

♡ lyric inspiration: “I will follow you way down, wherever you may go. I will follow you down, to your deepest lows. I will always be around to wherever life takes you. You know I’ll follow you.”

♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes

✨ you were walking in with Damian, blabbering about something that he could have cared less about as you approached Jon. the two of them had to head over to the Batcave to talk about a mission that went sideways a few days ago and you were too bored to not tag along with them.

✨ while you weren’t much of an active hero, you did get called in from time to time to help the Titans or Jon when they needed it, so it wasn’t a secret to you about their identities. Jon more than Damian was more opened to tell you who he actually was and you found comfort in the idea that he trusted you that much baggage.

✨ “what are we gonna do later? i’m not really in the mood to be going home. everyone has been getting on my nerves lately.” you asked the pair. Damian rolled his eyes as Jon smiled, “you can watch movies back at my place! i’m sure my dad wont mind,” he said with a small blush.

✨ Damian wanted to groan, feeling the strong sense to cringe at Jon’s foolish attempt to ask you out on a date. you agreed, hugging the taller boy as he fell stiff at the touch. Damian groaned but this time out loud. you gave him a look before dismissing him.

✨ all of you arrived to the cave, greeting Alfred before heading down to the cage. you had offered to make yourself and the boys coffee while they talked in the cave. Alfred was making small conversation about how your day was and if Damian was doing alright in school. while he knew Damian was smart, he knew in social settings, he wasn’t the greatest.

✨ finally, you finished making all of their coffee’s and put them on a tray before heading downstairs. you heard noise from the top of the stairs and being careful with the coffee, you zoomed downstairs to try and figure out what was going on. you set the coffee on the small table outside of the cave and opened the door to see Jon and Damian basically fighting someone around the cave.

✨ you looked at the girl, who looked no older than nineteen, trying to save her own ass as her eyes gleamed red. once you caught her attention, she immediately ran to you, “MOM! THANK GOD!” she yelled. Jon without hesitation ran to protect you but the girl beat him to you and engulfed you in a hug.

✨ “first off, I’m not your mother and I have no idea who the hell you are,” you screamed as Jon and Damian took her off you. Damian restrained her as you and Jon looked at her, “who are you and who/what sent you here,” Damian threatened as he took the pocket knife he had in his sock and put it against her throat.

✨ “I’m Lois Kent, daughter of ( your name ) and Jon Kent,” you looked at Jon before you started laughing hysterically. you tried to calm yourself down as Lois continued to explain herself, “I’m from years into the future. I was sent back in an accident by Uncle Damian and my dad,” she yelled, trying to get Damian to release her.

✨ Jon, who had yet to speak word, bent down to her height, “why should we believe you? you very well could have known our identities and made up a stories to ambush us,” Jon said. “run a DNA test if you’re so concerned,” she replied. you gave Damian and Jon a look as Damian asked you to grab her while he called his dad and even Clark to come down to the cave.

✨ “we can start on the DNA before our dads get here but until then, you’ll be restrained to the chair until we get the results,” Damian practically spat as he grabbed ropes and cords before sitting her down on Tim’s computer chair, “you have a lot of nerve making up such a story,” Jon whispered to her as she groaned, “you make up some crazy story pretending to be our kid and even giving yourself my mothers name to make it even more believable.”

✨ she sighed, “I’m not lying! I was working on a project with Uncle Damian and you when Uncle Damian accidentally opened up a portal that sucked me back into the past,” she explained, “you named me after grandma because you always said you’d name your first daughter after her.” Jon remained silent, knowing what shew as saying was true. Jon, years ago, made a pact that he would name his daughter, if he had the opportunity to have one, to name her after his mom.

✨ “and why should we believe you? outside of the DNA test, how can you prove that,” you said walking up to the both of them. she sighed, happy that she was no longer getting lectured by Jon, “I know that you asked mom out after a movie date. the song both of you claim to be ‘your song’ is ‘Follow You’ by Imagine Dragons and that you used to sing it to me as a baby,” she confessed.

✨ you immediately looked to Jon and stood in disbelief. both you and Jon loved that song and always sang it whenever he picked you up to hang out. “dad always tells me that he always thought you were too good for him and that you deserved to be with someone else but you always end up smacking him in the back of the head when he says that. plus, you always said that you love his small accent,” she continued.

✨ before you say anything, Damian grabbed three small tubes and asked all of you to spit in them. Damian watched the three of you spit in the tubes and in the back of his mind, he could start to see the similarities in Lois’ facial features and they looked eerily reminiscent to you and Jon combined.

✨ “our dads should be here soon but until then, don’t make a move!” he yelled before moving back to lab and computers. you sat next to Lois as Jon continued to question her, “how old are you?” you asked her, “seventeen. you guys always say i look older than i am. say, since I’m in the past, how old are you guys?” she asked. you looked to Jon, “we’re also seventeen but we’re not saying anything else,” you stated.

✨ finally, Clark and Bruce walked in, pure panic written on their faces. Clark and Bruce saw the three of you sitting down together and almost immediately, Clark could sense she was a Kent. given, she looked like both you and Jon, she did have some facial features that looked like Lois.

✨ “have you ran a test? Bruce asked Damian. he nodded as he showed the three tubes on the table as the spit was being ran through the system, “she claims that her name is Lois. named after his mom,” Damian murmured. Clark felt the pang in his chest. if the DNA test rang positive that she was your kid, he felt proud that Jon named his daughter after his mom.

✨ you got up from your chair and grabbed the coffees from the table outside, “here, the coffee was supposed to be Damian’s but I’m sure you could use some,” you offered it as you held the cup in front of her with a straw sticking out. Lois smiled, taking a sip, “it’s nice seeing both of you so young. dad always says both of you had me so young but he doesn’t regret a single thing,” you gave her a look, “how young do you claim we had you?” you asked.

✨ Lois laughed, “well, if you’re seventeen now, expect me to be here when you’re both nineteen.” Jon let out a belting laugh as you stood in your chair mortified at the answer, “nineteen? that’s two years from now!” you whispered to yourself, “I mean, both of you are already married by then,” she continued to say.

✨ Jon now stood mortified what she was saying. he hadn’t even confessed his feelings to you yet and two years from now, both of you were married with a kid on the way? as you both were talking to her, the results pinged up on the screen, alerting Bruce, Clark, and Damian.

✨ the three of them looked at the screen in surprise. she was telling you the truth. the DNA matched closest to you and Jon. Clark couldn’t even lie to himself, seeing his feature granddaughter made him emotional. she looked happy, healthy, and beautiful. he was glad Jon had chosen you to be his wife. he always thought you were the perfect fit for his son.

✨ “the results are in,” Damian screamed to the three of you. you looked to Jon in nervousness, “you’re the parents,” Damian said, now a bit more seriously. Jon looked at you as you had tears in your eyes, “you’re our first daughter?” you whispered to her as Lois now had watery eyes and nodded in agreement.

✨ Clark walked over and smiled at the three of you as Lois perked up, “grandpa!” she yelled as you started to untie her. as soon as she was let free, she engulfed the three of you and smiled, “it’s weird seeing all three of you so...young!” she repeated. you smiled, “say, that’s Uncle Damian right?” she asked. you nodded as she released all of you.

✨ “GODFATHER!” she yelled, running to Damian. Damian flinched as he heard the name. Bruce couldn’t help but start laughing. he never imagined Damian getting such a title.....like ever. “do you think we’ll have to try and send her back or do you think future us will do that?” Jon asked his dad. “I’m sure all of you in the future are going to figure that out. until then, I guess enjoy time with your daughter?”

✨ you walked over to Lois, “well, we should get you something to eat. Bruce mentioned that Alfred finished cooking dinner so I guess as parents, you need to eat,” Lois agreed as she walked over to Jon, “weird that they have kids,” Damian said, “don’t forget you’re her godfather,” Bruce mentioned. Clark laughed at the banter as they followed you three.

✨ over the course of dinner, Lois kept mentioning small parts of her childhood and how all of you turned out. Damian had a kid but had yet to marry the woman with whom he had them with. Bruce as well had found someone down the line to marry and had one more kid after Damian.

✨ after the dinner, all of you landed in the living room, trying to figure out a way to get Lois back home but within those few minutes, the same portal that brought Lois into the past reappeared. you and Jon stood up immediately, grabbing Lois and putting her behind the two of you.

✨ three figures stepped out. the future you, Jon, and Damian. all of you were much older than you were now but as soon as your future self saw Lois, you ran to her and engulfed her with a sigh of relief, “I swear I’m never gonna let you do any experiments with Damian and your dad,” you whispered as future Jon and Damian stared at their younger selves.

✨ “hey dad,” future Damian and Jon said nervously. the two of them shook their heads in disbelief as they gave them slight head nods before leaving before it got any weirder. Jon looked to his younger self, “have you asked her out yet?” he asked. young Jon shook his head no, “don’t worry kid, you will. I’m sure she told you already but don’t worry, life gets so much better with her,” older Jon said as he looked to you and Lois.

✨ your older version looked to you and smiled, “the movie date both of you have is one you won’t ever forget. trust me, Lois and Jon are the best thing to happen to us. just don’t be scared when you get surprises in a few years,” you joked as you took Jon and Lois’ hand.

✨ Damian had been staring down his older self down, probably judging and figuring out ways he could improve himself now so he wouldn’t look like that in the future. Lois gave you and Jon a hug, “I’ll miss you guys but like I said, we’ll see each other soon,” she whispered as you nodded and tightened the hug.

✨ the four of them walked back into the portal as Damian sat down on the couch with relief, “well, don’t yall have that movie night to get too?” Damian said grabbing the remote and insinuating to get out of his house. you flipped him the middle finger as you grabbed your backpack, “you still wanna?” you asked Jon.

✨ Jon nodded, “of course, we can pick up dinner on the way,” Jon said as he stared at you with heart eyes. now that he saw the future that was ahead of him, he knew this ‘movie night’ he asked you on was a major point in both of your lives and he didn’t want to miss it.

✨ after telling Damian goodbye, Jon grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it, “horror? or comedy?” he asked softly, “horror!” you said back excitedly.

#dc #DC imagines #dc imagine #dc x reader #DC comics #jon kent #jon kent imagine #jon kent x reader #jon kent x y/n #superboy #superboy imagine #superboy x reader #superboy x y/n

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buffysummers · 3 years ago

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Oh, hello there, gentle viewers. Today, I’m finally going to discuss why the claim of “I only ship Spuffy in season seven” is, in fact, still not okay and deeply flawed.

Before I jump into this, I just want to preface this by saying that we should ALL be allowed to like what we like, EVEN if it’s garbage or toxic. We all have that One Ship™ or that One Character™ that we’d risk it all for, even if we know they’re evil/etc. There is NOTHING wrong with enjoying bleak, dark and disturbing fiction. Fiction is a great way to escape reality and explore the darker, grittier, more twisted aspects of life with no real consequences, because, you know, it isn’t real.

HOWEVER, a lot of people have a hard time drawing a line, especially when fiction often explores very real issues, such as abuse and rape. This brings me to the Buffy and Spike, “Spuffy,” problem and why we cannot just simply write off Spuffy as fiction because this dynamic explores very real issues that happen to people everyday, and when we see people excusing rape and abuse, that’s when the not-so-real fiction becomes a very real and serious issue. That’s when rape and abuse survivors start to feel uncomfortable or triggered. Or when people that (thankfully) haven’t experienced these terrible realities feel confused and also a bit appalled. Here’s a bit of juxtaposition to better elaborate on this point: a human being cannot be emotionally/romantically/etc involved with a 200+ vampire because vampires ARE NOT real. But a human being can definitely be abused and raped. That is not fantasy. It’s real life.

Ok, I’m almost about to dive in. But I also want to add that I am addressing this because I have received a lot of anons from Spuffies defending their ship and claiming that they don’t ship Buffy and Spike in season six (which is probably a lie since half of the Spuffy edit tag is gifs from season six lol) but only in season seven, where Spike “gets a soul” for Buffy. Since like 70% of the Buffy fandom is up Spike and Spuffy’s ass, I don’t really expect many people to read this. But I am just really tired and I need to get this out of my system. Plus, analyzing fiction is rewarding in so many ways.

Now I’m actually going to start, and there’s nowhere else to start but from the beginning, where Spike allegedly gets a soul for Buffy after he attempts to rape her, so that he “can be the kind of man who would never—” I use the word allegedly, because here’s some quotes from Spike right as he leaves town to “get his soul”:

It's the chip! Steel and wires and silicon. It won't let me be a monster. And I can't be a man. I'm nothing.

Get nice and comfy, Slayer. I'll be back. And when I do ... things are gonna change. [sidenote: this line and the previous line are a bit vague and open to interpretation, and COULD be referring to him getting a soul. But the manner in which the lines are delivered, with so much anger and loathing, do not indicate he is going to do something good, like say, getting your soul.]

DEMON: Something about a woman. The slayer. SPIKE: Thinks she's better than me. Ever since I got this bleeding chip in my head, things ain't been right. Everything's gone to hell.

Bitch is gonna see a change.

Got any more ruddy tests for me, you ponce? I'll take anything you can throw at me, if it'll get me what I need to take care of the Slayer. Give her what's coming to her. [sidenote: again, he says this angrily, and the script reflects this as well.]

So you'll give me what I want. Make me what I was. So Buffy can get what she deserves.

Ok, so the last line is, of course, pretty ambiguous. The writers even said that they intentionally tried to throw off the audience and make them BELIEVE that Spike was trying to get his chip removed. But they were a little too convincing, so the twist does not feel earned. It would be one thing if these lines were written and delivered in a different way. Maybe with conflict and regret. But he refers to her as a bitch multiple times, and says every line with malice. Now, say this were a courtroom and this were a murder trial. Intent matters, intent always matters. Intent often can make or break a case. The most logical way to read these lines is that Spike INTENDED to get his chip removed because the text best supports this conclusion, but the demon saw through him. So, even though the demon understood the internal conflict better than Spike clearly did, he did not go through those trials to get his soul. And that is why, to this day, fans of the show still don’t think he went to get his soul back for her.

For argument’s sake, maybe if he really DID intend to get his soul back, and we just completely sidestep all the references to his chip, he still isn’t getting his soul with good intentions (takes us back to: intent! matters!). Maybe he’s getting his soul “for her” but the way the scenes are written, with such malice and anger, coupled with the fact that Spike is STILL soulless and incapable of doing anything for purely selfless reasons, he is not getting his soul for romantic and valiant reasons.

The soul aspect is obviously very important because this is basically what causes Buffy to forgive Spike. When she first sees him in season seven, she is rightfully angry. She says things like: “Everything about you is wrong, Spike” and “You tried to rape me. I don’t have the words.” She can tell he is withholding information from her (especially because she found him crazy in the basement) and is skeptical about his intentions. But then he makes that speech to her in “Beneath You” which I’m quoting from the script:

SPIKE: Am I flesh? Am I flesh to you? Feed on flesh. My flesh. Nothing else. Not a spark. (nods) Oh, fine. Flesh then. Solid through. (starts unzipping his pants) Get it hard; service the girl.

BUFFY: This is all you get. I'm listening. Tell me what happened. SPIKE: I tried to find it, of course. BUFFY: Find what? SPIKE: The spark. The missing... the piece that fit. That would make me fit. Because you didn't want... (starts to cry) God, I can't... Not with you looking.

SPIKE: I dreamed of killing you. I think they were dreams. So weak. Did you make me weak, thinking of you, holding myself, and spilling useless buckets of salt over your... ending? Angel—he should've warned me. He makes a good show of forgetting, but it's here, in me, all the time. The spark. I wanted to give you what you deserve, and I got it. They put the spark in me and now all it does is burn.

BUFFY: You got your soul back. How? SPIKE: It's what you wanted, right? And—and now everybody's in here, talking. Everything I did...everyone I— and him... and it... the other, the thing beneath—beneath you. It's here too. Everybody. They all just tell me go... go... to hell. BUFFY: Why? Why would you do that— SPIKE: Buffy, shame on you. Why does a man do what he mustn't? For her. To be hers. To be the kind of man who would nev— to be a kind of man.

This is all very important because before Buffy found out that Spike got his soul back “for her,” she wanted nothing to do with him. In fact, only a few scenes earlier in the same episode, he makes a joke about the fact that it was their first contact since he tried to rape her.

So, while Spuffies like to prop up Spike getting his soul for Buffy as a very romantic and amazing gesture, there isn’t good evidence in the show to support that he was getting it back for her, and also, that it was used as a manipulation tactic. Now, suddenly, Buffy feels conflicted about holding Spike accountable for anything he did to her, and she feels pressured into forgiving him because he :/ got :/ his :/ SOUL :/ for her. And now he’s crazy in the basement!

Moving on from that. Now Spike has a soul and he got it for Buffy and Buffy knows that. Now the writers make Spike the victim of The First, which makes it much easier for the audience to sympathize with him, and thus forget that he literally tried to rape the show’s titular heroine. Spike is in danger, Spike doesn’t have free will, Spike is now important to Buffy’s mission because he clearly has been under the influence of The First, so therefore he is valuable to Buffy’s mission. So, now she must get close to Spike to learn more about the thing from beneath them that plans to devour them all. [for reference: 7.08]

This leads us to “Never Leave Me” where Spike victimizes himself, and shames Buffy. Here’s an exchange between Buffy and Spike:

BUFFY: How did you do it? How'd you get your soul back?

SPIKE: Saw a man about a girl. (sighs) I went to seek a legend out. Traveled to the other side of the world, made a deal with a demon.

BUFFY: Just like that?

SPIKE: No, not just like that. There was a price. There were trials, torture, pain and suffering... of sorts.

BUFFY: Of sorts?

SPIKE: Well, it's all relative, isn't it?

BUFFY: Meaning?

SPIKE: Meaning I have come to redefine the words pain and suffering since I fell in love with you.

BUFFY: (sighs) How can you say that?

SPIKE: Apparently, I just slaughtered half of Sunnydale, pet. I'm not really worried about being polite anymore.

BUFFY: (nods) So, that's what this is about. (stands, crosses arms) You feeling sorry for yourself, Spike?

SPIKE: I'm feeling honest with myself. You used me.

BUFFY: Yes.

SPIKE: You told me that, of course. I never understood it though. Not until now. You hated yourself, and you took it out on me.

I think Buffy puts it pretty nicely when she says, “You feeling sorry for yourself, Spike?” Because in this scene, he completely ignores the damage that he did to Buffy (which, YES, it’s in season six, but he is ENSOULED while doing this) and instead says that she used him. Which is kind of pointless to bring up because he also says “you told me that, of course” so therefore the only reason WHY he brings this up is to victimize himself and make her feel guilty about it. It’s important to note that Spike still has not apologized for trying to rape her, by the way.

So, this leads us to how Buffy’s character arc suffers so that the writers can instead evoke sympathy for Spike from the audience. Here are some totally, and extremely, out of character things Buffy does in season seven (and actually all of her OOC moments are because of Spike):

Buffy agrees to let Dawn stay with Spike in 6.20 immediately after he tried to rape her. This is the same Buffy that literally sacrificed her life to save Dawn, by the way. Dawn is the most important person in Buffy’s life. But yeah, she’d TOTALLY let Dawn stay with Spike so he could “protect” her. (yes, this is season six but it’s too important not to note, seeing as it’s her most OOC moment in the entire series).

Buffy doesn’t immediately dust Spike in 7.08 despite the fact that she just discovered that he’s being controlled by The First and slaughtered a dozen+ women. You can make the argument that she doesn’t dust him because he may have valuable intel, and that’s a pretty good argument. But still, it just doesn’t seem like something Buffy would do. (SIDENOTE: Just wanna add more to this point. She almost killed Anya three episodes prior because Anya slaughtered some frat guys. Anya even acknowledges and understands WHY Buffy has to kill her. Buffy later defends her choice and compares it to when she had to kill Angel, where she says verbatim, “I loved him more than I will ever love anything in this life.” You’re telling me that now she isn’t capable of killing Spike despite the fact that he’s been MURDERING girls for weeks? Yes, this is different from the situation with Anya because Spike didn’t have free will, but Buffy is often a little self-righteous, and innocent women being murdered doesn’t really seem like something she’d sweep under the rug, especially given how unstable Spike is. He is much more of a liability than an asset to her mission, at this point.)

In 7.09, Spike basically BEGS Buffy to kill him. He even asks her: have you ever really asked yourself why you can’t do it [kill him]? This frames him as the noble guy, the selfless hero, while she defends his actions and looks dumb while doing so. We’re SUPPOSED to be on Spike’s side in this scene because Buffy, despite having no real reason not to, refuses to kill him and ignores all the damage he’s done, the damage he readily admits to. He’s essentially admitting he’s done terrible things but not expecting any consequences because Buffy is being written, well, entirely out of character. She makes excuses for his actions. It’s like going to confession, you say what you’ve done, and suddenly you’re forgiven. Because, OF COURSE, Buffy would ignore the fact that he’s a liability to her, the girls, and her mission to save the world.

Buffy is more concerned about rescuing Spike from the cave in 7.11 rather than dusting the turok-han that is an immediate threat to her safety and literally the entire world, seeing as the turok-han is The First’s weapon and its mission is to destroy the Slayer line which destroys the balance between good and evil, which will then allow The First to overrun the earth.

Buffy lets Spike live in the house with all the potentials despite knowing that he has a trigger that can be activated at any time by The First. 7.12-7.17. But ESPECIALLY in 7.17 when she sees it activated in front of her very eyes and yet decides to unchain him. Giles tries to reason with Buffy that she is putting their entire cause at risk and all of their lives at risk as a result, but she simply doesn’t care. Buffy has never been stupid, but she looks pretty stupid here (hence, the OOC aspect), especially because she has no rebuttal to his argument. Dawn is also injured by Spike in this scene and instead of going upstairs with her, she stays with Spike.

Buffy says she will let Spike kill Wood because she has a mission to save the world. Now, I don’t have *as much* of an issue with this because I see Buffy’s point a little, seeing as the fate of the world is more important than vendettas and Spike, now free of his trigger, is a valuable asset to her army. But she would never just sit by and let an innocent human get murdered lol.

This leads me to the conclusion of: If you have to change almost everything about a character to make a ship make sense, it’s probably not a very good ship.

The writers also continue to isolate Buffy from the rest of the group. Enough where Buffy says in 7.19: “You sent away the one person [Spike] that’s been watching my back.” So, let’s unpack this. Here are the ways in which Spike has had Buffy’s back up until that point in the season:

He shows up last minute to help her save Cassie in 7.04

He goes on outings with her and the potentials while she trains them in 7.12

Here are some group efforts he made (meaning, he wasn’t the only one helping Buffy):

He helps get the love spell jacket with Xander in 7.06

He helps shut down the seal in 7.16 with Buffy, Wood and Andrew after the rest of the gang helped research.

A moment where Buffy could have really used his support:

In 7.15 when Buffy calls Chloe weak and everyone starts to gang up on her and call her out of line, he chooses to leave.

The Golden Rule, aka “show, don’t tell” is an important writing technique that we should all follow when writing literally anything. Here, season seven fails on this front, again. Just because Buffy SAYS Spike is the one person that’s had her back does not automatically make it ring true. In fact, there’s no evidence to support that claim by Buffy. [sidenote: he does have her back BIG time in 7.20, but again, that doesn’t undo the fact that when Buffy said that line, it literally wasn’t true at all. It just shows you how the writing isn’t there to support these claims. It’s all empty words used to manipulate the audience into thinking this relationship is more than it actually is.]

There’s more I could say, of course, but this is already so long. My main point is that the writers in season seven do not let Buffy heal, they do not let Buffy process her trauma whatsoever. Instead, they emotionally blackmail her via Spike getting a soul for her, victimize Spike, and have her make very dumb, irrational and OOC decisions to justify her feelings for him. Buffy is a very forgiving person, it’s true, but they do not let her acknowledge or address her trauma. So, seeing her coddle Spike just simply does not make sense, especially when season six is all we have to fallback on for their “relationship” which wasn’t, in fact, a relationship at all (Buffy even says to Spike in 7.20 that they were never close.) Honestly, you can’t really entirely separate season six and season seven Spuffy because their supposed connection, their history and her reluctance to kill him or let him go is entirely built on what happened between them prior to season seven.

The abuse in season seven is a lot more subtle, and it’s mostly verbal and emotional abuse, but it is STILL abuse. And it STILL shouldn’t be supported or romanticized. Like Spuffy all you want, but justifying this is just plain wrong and harmful for so many reasons. Just use your brain before you say something that could potentially trigger, offend or harm someone that has experienced this firsthand. Victim blaming is very real and happens everyday, and it happens to Buffy repeatedly throughout season seven.

#anti spuffy #anti spike #buffy thoughts #season seven #rape tw #abuse tw #btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #again this is long and this was more so for my benefit bc I have always wanted to analyze my issues with season seven #and basically the only issue i've ever had with season seven is spuffy #and the way buffy is characterized at times #all bc of him #the reason I care: buffy is my favorite show #I don't watch it BECAUSE of the relationships #If I did... well I would've quit after angel leaves #I watch it for buffy

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titan-fodder · 3 years ago

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Find a Way Chapter 6

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Rating: M (mature; mdni)

Count: ~7.4k

Tags/Warnings: alcohol, ruthless teasing, daddy, awkward interactions, Erwin (is his own warning), general shyness and vulnerability

A/N: buckle up, it’s about to get heated. thanks for waiting, and don’t worry; there’s still much more to come. enjoy~

It feels like headway is being made in terms of spending time outside of the sandwich shop and bar you work at, but Miche can't help but think these are still the settings in which he gets to know you best, either having the excuse to fire questions back and forth or able to watch you work and interact with the people at Marley’s.

Tonight finds the two of you at the bar once again, only it’s a little different than usual. For one, you’re not actually on the schedule, free to mill about the establishment as you please. Two, you are free to drink. Quite literally.

Reiner (Miche is pretty sure now that's his name) makes you whatever you want whenever you want it, and Miche has to hand it to you, you pace yourself better than most twenty-somethings (definitely better than he ever did). You down water between mixed drinks, eat a little bit here and there, and even turn down some of the shots customers offer to buy you.

That doesn't mean you're sober, though. Miche is willing to bet you're at least tipsy as you lean over the bartop, saying something to your co-worker, the tall brunet—Bert?—that makes him splutter and quickly turn away.

Reiner slides you another drink, you blow him a kiss, and then you make your way back over to the little table Miche secured some time ago, straw between your lips, eyes locked on his the entire time it takes you to get from the counter to your chair.

You're a little off tonight, though not in a bad way. It's your attitude, your energy. Miche is used to your teasing and overall playful nature, but tonight, your eyes are brighter and your tongue is looser.

"Love those dudes so much," you announce, glancing over your shoulder at your coworkers, Bert dancing back and forth as Reiner tries to swat him with his towel.

"Yeah, they seem nice," Miche comments.

He isn't especially familiar with any of your friends, but what he knows of them, he appreciates. Reiner and his boyfriend watch out for your safety, and Bert and Annie pick up your shifts when you're too drained from school. They all seem like a good support system which is necessary for someone with an extraordinary amount of pressure sitting on their shoulders. Miche wouldn't have made it through med school if it weren't for Erwin, Nile, and Hange, would have probably flunked out first semester if he's being honest.

"One day you'll meet everyone else," you tell him. "I want you to meet everyone else—Sasha and Hitch and Jean and Marco. The whole crew."

"Oh yeah? What are you gonna do if they don't like me?" He's kidding, fairly confident in his ability to charm a group of students, but he's still curious about your answer.

You make a noise that sounds a lot like blowing raspberries, waving a hand as you do. "Impossible. You're very likeable, Miche. Too likeable, I daresay."

"That so?"

"Mhmmm. I mean, I like you, and I think I'm a pretty good judge of character. Most of the time."

He chuckles, not much else he can do. "I'm glad to hear it."

You rest your cheek in your hand, searching for the straw underneath your mouth and having just enough trouble finding it to make Miche snort into his soda. After pouting for a couple seconds, though, you move on.

"Tell me about your day."

He takes a sip from his glass then leans back in his chair, lacing his fingers behind his head.

"Nothing too interesting, just consults all day. Expectant mothers and a couple newborn checkups."

You hum, blinking slowly from across the table, and Miche has a feeling you want him to elaborate.

"One of the babies that came in today has a cleft palate, so we ended up scheduling his surgery."

"Oh, good!"

"Yeah, he's already a handsome little guy, but getting it repaired early on will lessen the likelihood of a big scar."

"He'll appreciate that when he's older."

You tell him about Jean wanting to specialize in plastic surgery, so, "He'll probably do a lot of those. That and boob jobs."

"Oh, most definitely. That's what Nile wanted to go into, but it was for all the wrong reasons." Miche has to laugh again. "It's a good thing he went into teaching instead. I have no doubt he'd have at least one malpractice suit lodged against him by now. At least."

Your face twists into a sour expression as you realize just what Miche is insinuating.

"Okay, ew. Did not wanna know that about my fucking professor, so thanks."

"I'm just saying. He can be a smarmy guy. He's probably stared at your—"

He stops himself right there, alarmed that he let himself even start that thought. Implying Nile has looked at your chest indirectly implies that Miche has too, and he can't have that, can't have you thinking he's some kind of pervert checking you out all the time. He has before—of course he has—but that doesn't mean he wants you to know about it because he's already ashamed as it is, and—

"Miche."

His wide eyes refocus to find you still sipping your drink, looking at him in question.

"You okay there? Look like you're about to stroke out or something."

"I'm fine. Just—"

"Thinkin' about my boobs?"

He nearly falls out of his chair, having to lean forward again and plant both feet on the ground, suddenly lightheaded as all his blood gathers in his cheeks rather than doing its job and oxygenating his whole body.

"Christ, no."

"I mean, they're nice boobs, it's okay," you giggle, glancing down at your own chest, covered by a tight little t-shirt, and fuck, now you're making him look. "I'm pretty fond of them myself, so like, can't really blame you."

Dragging a hand down his face, Miche tells you plainly, "You're killin' me here."

Sticking your tongue out between your teeth, you wink, then polish off your glass and stand up.

He assumes you'll wander back to the bar, order another fruity cocktail or maybe a water.

But no. You round the table, fingers gliding over the laminated wood as you go, and all Miche can do is watch until you stop right next to him and seat yourself right in his fucking lap.

His jaw drops, breath catching in his throat, and fuck, your hands are on his shoulders, and you're licking your lips, and uttering just loud enough to hear, "So, I've been meaning to talk to you about somethin' these past couple days?"

Miche's voice cracks when he replies, "What is it?" like he's suddenly going through puberty again. He doesn't quite know what to do with his arms and legs, scared that if he resituates himself in his chair, it'll cause you to rub against him, and that'll just be too much for him to handle right now.

Years ago, something like this wouldn't have fazed him much. He's had girlfriends, had flings, got used to women hitting on him in college which is good because now he knows how to keep a straight face when they do it in the workplace.

But, something about you, all flirty and bold, it's making Miche feel things he hasn't in a long time.

Then again, that's really how this all started, you sparking something inside of him that very first night and then stoking tiny flames when he had run into you again here.

So far, it's all been about remembering what it's like to develop feelings—real feelings—for someone, getting used to that fluttery sensation in his stomach and not being able to keep from smiling when he sees your name on his phone. That's what he's been focused on.

But right now, in this moment, he's trying very hard to focus on what is happening in his pants. Trying to keep it from happening.

"Mhm," you nod, your fingers sliding to the back of his neck and stroking just under his hairline.

If you're not careful…

No. No. He is an adult. He can handle this. He's not some little college boy with no self control.

Taking a deep breath, Miche sets his jaw. He does give himself the grace to set his hands on your hips, but once there, he doesn't move them, not so much as a twitch that could be construed as sensual.

"Go on, then."

So close to him, he can see the way your eyelashes fan over your cheeks every time you blink, how your lips part and your nostrils flare ever so slightly.

"So, um," you swallow, and for the first time tonight, the boldness fades quickly into shyness. "You've been great these last few months. Like, incredible. In so many different ways, and um…"

Miche waits patiently, not wanting to interrupt and ruin whatever little speech your beautiful, intoxicated brain has stewing in it.

"Well, you know, you've been helping so much—buying me things and helping me study, keeping me fed," you emphasize the last part, and Miche has to laugh.

"Couldn't just let you starve."

"No, I know, I know, just um…" You shift in his lap, getting impossibly closer, almost conspiratorial, and it has Miche biting back a groan. "Anyway, what I'm tryin' to say is that it's all kinda one-sided, don't ya' think?"

Frowning, Miche begins to shake his head, but the fingertips pressing into the back of his neck stop him.

"I wanna make it up to you somehow."

He has a pretty good idea of where this is going, and the thought alone makes his entire body heat up, but—

"You don't have to do anything," he sighs. "Just keep studying and pass your classes, and I'll be happy."

The noise of dissatisfaction that's pushed from your throat is adorable, but Miche knows better than to say so.

"Okay, but maybe I'm not happy," you pout. "Maybe I wanna change our arrangement."

"Arrangement, huh?"

"Is'at not what it is? Some unspoken agreement to let you take care of me?"

Mouth starting to run dry, Miche does his best to shrug, his grip on your waist tightening against his will.

"If that's what you want to call it—"

"I don't know what else to call it. Unless—" You're eyes flash, and Miche's stomach sinks and flips at the same time because that look, the way your lips are curling, you're about to do or say something that's going to unravel him.

"Unless what?"

Your sing-song giggle sounds anything but innocent, and Miche finds out why when you lean in closer to talk into his ear, secretive and sultry when you finish, "Unless you want me to start telling people you're my sugar daddy."

There's no tickle in his throat, but Miche still finds himself coughing, lungs tight, pants tighter, and he knows you can see his blush. Fuck, you can probably feel the warmth radiating from him.

"Is'at what you want me to call you?" You tease, tacking on another, "Daddy?" and this time Miche does groan, aroused and surprised by it because that's never been a thing for him, but coming from you, doe-eyed and devious, the weight of you in his lap, the press of you against his body…

It seems he's discovered something new about himself tonight.

He is a grown man, though. He recognizes what's happening, can acknowledge the fact that his control is slipping, and knows he needs to remedy that. Quickly.

Red faced and undeniably hard at this point, Miche sighs. It's still difficult to get his thoughts straight, but as he takes in your face, the hopeful look on it, the desperation to please, he knows what he has to do.

"You're drunk."

Leaning back, your hands fall lightly to his collarbones, and Miche thinks he sees a little bit of the heady fog in your gaze evaporate.

"I'm… flattered," he continues. "And, I don't want you to take this as a—a rejection, but I can't in good conscience let you make this offer and let myself enjoy—" he vaguely gesticulates at your body and his, "—this, enjoy you, while knowing you're not sober."

"But…"

Miche smiles, takes your face in his hands and brings it forward so that he can brush his lips over your forehead.

"How about we just revisit the conversation when you're not five drinks in, okay?"

Your chest heaves with a deep breath, and for a moment, he thinks you're going to try to argue with him, but all you do is nod and fall forward, resting your face in the crook of his neck and giving him goosebumps.

"Hey, Miche?" You mumble, and he can feel all three syllables against his skin.

"Hm?"

"Can we go back to your loft?"

It makes him pause for a second, Miche wondering if you're deciding to ignore everything he's just said to you, but he understands once you elaborate.

"Wanna sleep in your bed again."

He chuckles, rubbing your back. "Yeah, sure."

"Thanks," you sigh against him. "Daddy."

Miche's head falls to your shoulder, nothing left to defend himself other than an exasperated, "Fucking tease," that makes you laugh.

There's a weight spanning the length of your back, warm but not overwhelming. Still, it makes you stiffen, eyes suddenly wide open until you realize where you are—green blankets, brick walls, sun shining through the window—and recognize the weight over you as a very large dog.

Minnie.

A rustling further up makes you turn your head and, to your surprise, you find Remy curled up on one of Miche’s pillows, yawning and blinking dark sleepy eyes at you.

“And, just where did you come from?” You ask like he can reply.

Miche must have gone and picked him up which is just… so, incredibly heartwarming, even if it does mean he was in your apartment without you there. The fact that he not only thought of your little boy but put forth the effort to go get him—he’s just so good, taking care of Remy and taking care of you—

Sitting upright, you swear under your breath, everything from the night before rushing back, some good, most bad, and Jesus Christ, why couldn’t you have gotten drunk enough to have just blacked out? At least then if you’d made a fool of yourself, you wouldn’t be able to recall any of it.

Pressing your palms against your eyes, you try to steady your breathing, not that it works.

You came onto him. Strongly. You—oh, god, you called him daddy, what in the actual fuck is wrong with you?

The pressure in your chest feels like it could be either a laugh or a sob, little pinpricks of heat dancing up your neck as you experience the embarrassment you apparently failed to the night before.

How are you supposed to face him? How are you supposed to look him in the eye? There’s no question; you have to find a way because you need to fucking apologize after putting him in such an awkward position. You can’t even begin to imagine what must have been going through his head, how desperate you must have looked.

If you could just go back in time, shake yourself out of it, tell yourself, ‘hm, maybe getting drunk around this guy you have a massive crush on isn’t the best idea’.

Too late now.

Falling back into the bedding, you stare at the ceiling as you sift through the memories, how nice Miche had been about it, gentle even as he turned you down, probably feeling sorry for you.

He did say you could revisit the conversation, you muse, but you don’t think you have the lady balls for that, hence being drunk while bringing it up in the first place.

And again, your mind supplies another argument. Miche wasn’t exactly unaffected by what you had to say, or maybe it was how you said it, in his lap, speaking in his ear. If you think about it enough, you can still remember the heat that coursed through you when you felt his cock grow hard beneath you.

A natural bodily reaction. Of course he’d get aroused. The problem here is that he didn’t want to be, just wanted to hang out and talk, and you just had to go and throw yourself at him.

You go back and forth like this for a while, the dogs trying to snooze but obviously unable to as you keep them awake with all the nervous energy pouring from you, and when you hear the door open and close downstairs, your stomach sinks even further.

Voices carry upward, one you easily recognize as Miche’s, the other unfamiliar. It’s deep, rich with a sort of refined accent, sounds like someone who spent much of their life in country clubs or something of the like. It’s obviously one of Miche’s friends. The question is which one. Also, if they’re going to leave soon or if you’re gonna have to meet them right in the middle of your existential crisis.

A loud laugh rings out, startling both you and the dogs, and you hear Miche shush whoever it is through his own chuckle, “Dude, quiet, she’s still sleeping.”

With a deep sigh, you throw an arm over your face then call out a muffled, “No’m not.”

“Oh,” Miche hums, then, “Sorry.”

After a three second pep talk (come on, you can do this, get up and do this, you got this), you swing your legs over the side of the bed, noting your attire—plaid boxers and a large orange t-shirt, the image of what you’re pretty sure is a wizard faded almost beyond real recognition. You can barely make out the upside down lettering underneath—Dungeons & Dragons—but once translated, you shake your head. Fucking nerd.

For a while, you just sit at the edge of the bed, contemplating if it’s even worth changing to go downstairs. Miche has probably filled in whoever it is down there with him, so their expectations of you can’t be that high, but at the very least, you should tame your hair and brush your teeth. At the very least.

The ensuite bathroom is open, and when you turn the light on and glance at the counter, you break into a grin at the sight of your own hairbrush, toothbrush, deodorant, and perfume. He didn’t just grab Remy from your apartment, it seems. Everything here in front of you was in plain view of anyone who peeked into your bathroom, and boy, are you glad Miche did.

After making yourself somewhat presentable, you change back into your shorts from the night before but refuse to ditch the insanely comfortable, insanely geeky shirt, and pad down the staircase, Remy and Minnie hot on your heels.

They’re on the couch, two heads swiveling toward you and making you stop in your tracks. Miche grins immediately, something you do not understand because he really should be upset with you, definitely should not be caring for you as he apparently has been over the course of the night.

A couple cushions over, a man you do, in fact, recognize stands up and makes his way over to you. Golden hair, deep blue eyes, perfect smile. Yeah, you’ve seen pictures of this one.

“Hello, I’m—”

“Erwin,” you finish with a nod, holding your hand out. “Miche’s told me about you some.”

“All good things, I hope,” he says, that smile only widening.

It truly has been all good things, even the silly stories from med school and intern year. Apparently, Erwin used to be a lampshade drunk, and knowing that makes him slightly less intimidating as you shake his hand.

Because he's still impressive, a cardiothoracic surgeon, if you're not mistaken, and you—you are a baby in comparison.

"Not a bad bone in your body, the way he talks about you," you say, causing both Erwin and Miche to chuckle.

After a short introduction of your own, you let your eyes flick to the couch where Miche is sitting, Remy in his lap now, enjoying the fingers scratching behind his floppy ears.

"Hey, thanks for getting him last night. I didn't even hear you."

"Yeah, probably 'cause you were dead to the world as soon as you laid down."

A good thing, you think. Being asleep means you weren't able to humiliate yourself any more than you already had. Being asleep means being safe. In this instance, anyway.

“Was I snoring?”

Miche smirks. “You really want me to answer that?”

You pinch the bridge of your nose, remind yourself that snoring is still better than humping his god damn leg, then shuffle into the kitchen for a glass of water. It takes you a second to find the right cabinet, and when you do, you have to stand on your tiptoes to actually reach a cup, but you manage to retrieve one.

“Tylenol is in the cabinet over the stove and to the right,” Miche calls out.

“I’m not hungover,” you laugh, pacing back out to join the two men. “Just thirsty.”

Erwin mumbles something suspiciously close to, “I bet you are,” but you’re okay with brushing it off, surely your ears deceive you. Miche, however, decides to kick his friend hard in the shin, only confirming the fact that yes—yes, that is exactly what just came out of this near stranger’s mouth, and yes, he meant it exactly the way you’re taking it.

You’re not gonna falter, though, not gonna let it get to you. Channel the bad bitch. Be the bad bitch. Don’t let him scare you away.

Locking eyes with Erwin, you remain straight faced as you take a long sip from your cup, letting out a satisfied, “Ah,” once you swallow. You won’t be the first to break, won’t be the first to look away, don’t even want to blink until Erwin finally starts laughing.

Turning to look at Miche, he mumbles something much quieter this time, making the other scoff before Miche levels his gaze at you, green and bright and just barely shining with something like irritation.

“Please just ignore him.”

Erwin snorts. “Good luck trying.”

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s—Anyway, um, you guys look like you’re about to do something or… something—”

“Game’s coming on in a little bit,” Miche supplies.

“Okay yeah, so I can just, like, get outta your hair.” Please, please let me get out of your hair. You are more than ready to disappear, only able to keep up the tough girl facade for maybe two minutes max.

Miche pushes himself off the couch after depositing Remy into Erwin’s lap, taking one long stride over to you, and you can’t stop yourself from leaning back just a little because he’s so tall and so gorgeous as he tilts his head down to look at you—you cannot believe you did what you did last night, your inner monologue turning to utter nonsense the longer you stare at him.

“Okay, so I can definitely drop you back off if you want,” he opens, and when his hands land on your shoulders, you gaze up at him in what just might be awe, fixating on the way his lips pull up on one side. Then, he’s turning you around and leading you closer to the front door where you see your backpack carefully perched on a low shelf. “Or, you can stay here for a while longer and let Erwin and me bother you until you can’t stand it anymore.”

“Fuck, what all did you grab from my apartment?” You laugh, focusing on that, otherwise you might scream because he is so cute, how can he be so fucking cute?

“Just what I thought you might need to spend the day here.”

You click your tongue, thinking for a moment. You don’t have class due to a professor being out sick (how dare he, if he had just not fallen ill, you wouldn’t have been drinking last night in the first place), but you do have a study session with your friends later this evening, probably at the usual coffee shop where you push two tables together and cover them with laptops and print-outs and spiral notebooks, ordering one tea after another or, if you’re feeling particularly tired, one espresso shot after another.

But oh, it’s so hard to say no to Miche when he’s looking at you the way he is, eyes the color of bubbling seafoam, hopeful, dancing with something you can’t place, and why—why does he want to keep you around? How is he not offended or disgusted with you? Why hadn’t he just left you at your own home instead of bringing you here last night?

“Okay, yeah,” you sigh, having to look away before you get completely lost in him. “But, I have to meet Jean and Marco and them at six tonight.”

“That’s fine. I can get you back by then.”

You grab your backpack, hauling it over to the couch but dropping to the ground right behind the little coffee table. You feel Miche sit behind you, to the side but still close enough that his calf brushes your arm. It’s stupid to try to study. You know you won’t get anywhere, but maybe, just maybe, you’ll be able to retain something you haven’t yet.

Laptop open with a PowerPoint pulled up, blank notecards in front of you, you start scribbling away. You’re maybe four minutes in when you hear Erwin question, “Etiology, huh?”

You only respond with a short, “Yep,” intent on staying at least halfway focused.

“I remember those days,” he continues to muse.

Thankfully, Miche seems to either read your mind or body language and picks up where you can’t. “You want to help her out then?”

“Didn’t say that,” the other man laughs.

“Then let her study.”

Craning your neck, you look just far enough over your shoulder to see Miche wink at you and feel your entire body grow lighter. So, that’s what swooning feels like.

“Okay, okay, sorry, my god.”

And, you’re left alone for a while, unperturbed until the game they’ve been waiting for comes on. They don’t do anything on purpose, but anytime a team scores (which is not often), they both move and make noise. You’re too aware of the way Miche’s body tenses and relaxes, and somewhere along the way you start to lean against his leg more than simply sit beside it.

Erwin orders takeout for the three of you, and when it arrives, Miche gets up from the couch, fingers brushing the crown of your head as he does, and that shouldn’t make you shiver, but it does, makes you stare after him and release a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding this whole time. Somewhere off to your left, Erwin snickers, but he doesn’t say anything, and that’s really all you can ask for at this point.

Another PowerPoint and a belly full of Chinese food later, you start packing your things up. Time went by surprisingly quickly, either because you actually managed to get caught up in the material or because time always seems to move faster when you’re around Miche.

After sliding your notes and laptop into your backpack, you go back upstairs to gather the other things Miche had brought to the loft for you, remembering at the last second to change back into your own shirt. It all worked out well considering when you get back to the den, the game seems to be over, Miche and Erwin both with smiles on their faces.

“Did we win at sportsball?” You joke, laughing in your throat when Erwin gawks at you. “Just kidding. I know it was Soccer.”

“Yes, we won,” Miche answers. “And, by we, I mean Liverpool.”

“Well, good for… Us. I guess.”

The three of you actually walk out together, Remy hopping in his harness as he goes. Erwin stops at the side of the road right next to a vintage Shelby Mustang, unlocking the door but only leaning against it. Before he can say whatever he’s about to, you turn to Miche, motioning toward the car and asking, “Okay, why can’t you have a car like that?”

Both of them laugh, Miche not missing a beat as he shoots, “Because I don’t like getting roadrash on my ass. You see how low that thing sits to the ground?”

“Okay, fair but… Look how pretty it is.”

Erwin is absolutely beaming, gently raps his knuckles just under the window as he thanks you. “She handles like a dream.”

“Yeah, how’s the gas mileage on it?” Miche challenges with a knowing grin.

“We don’t talk about that.”

The parting handshake with Erwin isn’t nearly as awkward as the first, polite as he tells you, “Lovely meeting you,” then, “I’m sure I’ll be seeing you again.”

“Uh, yeah, maybe.”

He waves at Miche, bends to give Remy a little chin scratch, then slides into his beautiful car and drives away.

Which leaves you alone with Miche for the first time since last night, and wow, you kind of wish Erwin would turn around and come back.

“I promise he wasn’t always so annoying,” Miche says, and that at least makes you smile, but it does not get rid of the pit that’s opened up in your stomach.

“He really didn’t bother me,” you shrug. You start to walk toward the little lot behind the building where you know Miche parks, adding, “Besides, he’s friends with you, so he can’t be that bad.”

Miche makes an unsure noise, all high-pitched and non-committal. “I’ve been known to make questionable decisions before, and he might be one of them.”

“Questionable decisions,” you titter. “Yeah, same.”

Obviously.

You lapse into silence as you pile your things into the back of the car. Miche opens your door for you, checking, “You good?” and waiting for your nod before closing it. Then, he’s right next to you, starting the car with the push of a button and backing out of the lot.

The quiet remains, enveloping you both until Miche turns on the radio, and you’re able to breathe easier for a few minutes.

“Make any headway studying today?”

“Some. Probably get more done this evening with everyone else.”

“Yeah, won’t have two assholes right behind you clapping at a soccer game.”

“I promise y’all were not that bad.” Sitting that close to him is what really had you distracted.

Another pause in already stunted conversation has you itching to get out of your own skin. Even with your apartment being as close as it is, you don’t think you can spend the whole ride there doing this, so—

“Okay, I’m just gonna say it before I literally explode.”

“Ah, been waiting for this,” Miche grins, and you almost reach out to smack him, but your brain is already too busy with what you want to say to him, jumbled thoughts with no organization in sight, probably nothing more than word vomit, but god dammit, you’ve gotta try to let him know.

“I am so sorry about last night—”

“Don’t be.”

“I don’t even know why—I mean, no, I know why—I just don’t know what I was thinking—”

“It’s okay.”

“I shouldn’t have gotten that sloppy around you, and I’m so, so—I’m fucking mortified, and I know you probably are too so—”

“Hey.”

You pause, only just realizing he’s been trying to get you to stop since you started. Looking at you from the corner of his eyes, Miche shows one of his soft smiles, the kind that makes your knees weak.

“I’m not about to hold it against you. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be okay? I’m the one who fucking assaulted you.”

Miche laughs, looking genuinely amused. “You did not assault me, and even if you had, I’m pretty sure I could have handled myself.” He flexes the arm closest to you just to prove his point, showing off the way his shirt sleeve pulls tight around his bicep.

“Okay,” you squint at him. “No need for that.” Really just because the urge to reach out and squeeze the muscle is much too strong.

“I’m just saying. If I felt threatened or whatever you think I felt, I could have removed myself from the situation with ease.”

“I’m just sorry I made you uncomfortable, and don’t even try to tell me I didn’t because we both know that’s a lie.”

“You didn’t—”

“Miche, I will harm you.”

“Well, now I do feel a little threatened,” he mumbles.

You huff, he chuckles, then goes on to explain, “I’m not gonna say I wasn’t a little taken off guard, but it wasn’t something I—” Miche stops, seems to have to think for a moment as he makes a turn. “I didn’t dislike it. I stopped you because you were drunk, not because… Not because… Jesus, why is this so much harder now?” He chuckles quietly. “It’s not because I didn’t want it. Because I—I do. There. Fuck.”

Somewhere in the middle of all that, your heart started to beat too fast and too hard, and he has to be able to hear it. You surely do, louder than the music playing, louder than his voice, pounding in your ears, picking up pace with every second because, “You do?”

“Well, yeah, how could I not?”

There are many ways he could not, many reasons: you’re twenty-five, you’ve still got years of school left, you work at a dingy bar and don’t even make enough for a halfway decent living, you’re a sloppy drunk and a little bit of a brat, the list goes on and on.

Remy gets antsy as Miche pulls into a covered parking place, looks at you seriously and says, “Hold that thought,” before turning the car off and stepping outside.

He grabs your bag while you carry Remy, out of breath as you make your way up to your apartment, though it’s not from the stairs. You unlock the door, set Remy down as Miche walks to the couch where he places your backpack.

Then, you’re both looking at each other, full on, no road to distract you, just staring as you try to keep your body from shaking with the rhythm of your heartbeat.

“Okay,” you exhale, hands beginning to tremble with nerves. “So, what… what exactly were you saying in the car?”

Bracing himself on the back of the couch, Miche rests against it and sucks his teeth in a thoughtful manner.

“I—look, it’s been a long time since I’ve done this, or really—” he blows hair out of his face, lips forming a little grin afterward, but it looks about as confident as you feel. “—I guess a long time since I’ve been nervous about it.”

If this is what you think it is, it’s been a long time for you too. There was no confessing in your last relationship, only falling into bed with a boy at a party and going from there. This, with Miche, is about as opposite from that as you can get. This has been a growing thing from the start. This has a foundation, but is it stable enough to build on top of?

He must see the question in your eyes, the uncertainty and confusion, because his expression turns to one so tender, and the muscles in his forearms relax as does the rest of his body.

“Come here,” he nods at you, and your feet move on their own accord, carrying you over to him, closer and closer. Miche’s legs, previously crossed at the ankle where he’s leaning—sitting, you realize now—spread enough to allow you to stand between them, and with such little space between the two of you, both your brain and lungs seem to stop working at the same time.

The light green of his eyes is mesmerizing and comforting, lulling you into a state of security despite your alarming pulse. You admire the soft lines of his face, all etched there from happy times. The gray at his temples interweaves and blends well with the rest of his dark blond hair, a hint of silver in his beard as well, and everything about him is so handsome—sophisticated and rugged at the same time, like he doesn’t even have to try, and it leaves your stomach in knots.

“I am in new territory right now,” he admits, but as he does, he raises a hand to brush hair behind your ear, and you swear to god, you can feel your pupils dilate. “And, I think you might be too.” You nod but find yourself incapable of speaking, hands seeking purchase and finding it in the soft material of his t-shirt.

“For the record, I didn’t—I didn’t start talking to you because I wanted—In the grocery store, it wasn’t like I targeted you or anything.”

Finally, a laugh is pushed from your chest. “I know.”

“Okay, just making sure. Just know I didn’t plan any of this to happen. I didn’t plan… feelings.”

His face is red now, both of his cheeks as well as what you can see of his neck, and that brings you some relief because at least you’re not the only one freaking out a little.

“I…” You swallow, trying to get your mouth to work again and eventually succeeding. “I had an inkling I would probably catch them, I won’t even lie, but I didn’t ever think you... might… too.”

“You’re a lot more charming than you give yourself credit for.”

“Aw, shucks,” you giggle, and suddenly, Miche is pressing your face into his chest, which you can’t say you mind all that much. “Can’t look at me anymore?” You question, words muffled against t-shirt and pectoral. “‘m I that charming you can’t handle it?”

“Maybe,” he chuckles, and you loop your arms around his waist, squeezing as you hum. “I need to ask you something, though. For… clarification purposes.”

“Mkay.”

“Last night—”

“Oh, boy.”

You feel the rumble of laughter in his chest more than hear it.

“Last night the, uh… Offer you… Presented me with,” he starts, and you’re already long gone, trapped in a fit of embarrassed giggles—a panic response—and well on your way to perishing due to the amount of blood that’s pooling in your face. “I don’t know exactly what to make of it.”

“If I’m—oh man,” you have to wipe tears from your eyes, panting for a moment to catch your breath. “If I’m remembering correctly, I’m pretty—pretty sure I said I’d fuck you in return for you taking care of me.”

“Right, yes,” Miche’s voice comes out strained, and you begin to feel like you're coming back to yourself. “Is that—”

“Offer still on the table? Absolutely.”

“Jesus, shut—” Hand on the back of the head again, face smushed into pecs again. “Good to know, but not what I was about to ask.”

“Oh, okay,” you grin. “Carry on.”

“Thank you. Is that all you want out of this… What’d you call it last night?” He questions, but he remembers before you can speak up. “Oh, arrangement. Is that all you want out of our arrangement?”

“To be taken care of financially and in the bedroom?” Honestly, you surprise even yourself sometimes.

“Yeah,” he chuckles. “Is that all you’re looking for?”

“Well…” You push yourself away from his chest enough to stand a little straighter and look him in the eye, not that you can hold his gaze for long. He’s chewing on his lip, and you’re trying not to squirm too much, but it is difficult. “I mean, I—” Dropping your hands from behind his back, you instead start to toy with the hem of his shirt, timid all over again when you tell him, “I don’t know what I’m allowed to ask for.”

“I don’t either.”

Your eyes snap back up to his face, so open and honest. What could he possibly ask you for? What could he possibly want from you?

Part of you wishes you could be a little more poetic, have something romantic or flowery prepared for an occasion like this.

But, you aren’t, and you don’t, so you settle for raising to your tiptoes and tilting your head back, hoping Miche will get the idea and fill in the rest of the gap.

You’ve always known his hands are big, but when they cover your cheeks and curl to the back of your head, they feel especially huge. Miche has to stoop, but he doesn’t complain, just catches your lips with his, inhaling sharply through his nose and stealing what little breath you have left. He is firm and warm and gentle, his rhythm matching yours as you press against him, mouths moving just enough to get acquainted but not enough to taste.

When he pulls away, you try to follow, eyes still shut, seeking him out. You feel a tiny puff of warm air—his chuckle—dance across your lips before he gifts you with another, shorter kiss, then he straightens up and pulls you tight against him.

Fingers curled into his shirt, you hold him a little too tightly, lightheaded and unsteady on your feet.

That just happened. You just did that. He just did that.

And, now… Now, all you want is more.

Before you can suggest anything (or even look at him with any kind of salacious intent), your phone buzzes in your back pocket, startling you out of your dreamy, lustful haze.

"Hold please," you mumble, retrieving it and finding a message from Hitch.

>> hey girlypop, need me to come pick you up?

You weren't particularly keen on the idea of leaving Miche's to go study before, and now, standing so close to him, lips still tingling, you're even less inclined to go.

"Duty calls," he teases, then, noting your hesitance, adds, "We'll talk more later."

"Yeah?" You blink up at him, can't help but push, "Just talk?"

One of his eyebrows lifts in a warning that makes you shift your weight from one foot to another, a syrupy heat dripping down your spine when he tries to suppress a little smirk and fails to.

"We'll talk later," he reiterates. "Now, go get ready for your study sesh or whatever you guys call it."

You push your bottom lip out without thought, and he just barely brushes a thumb over it, clicking his tongue, then sliding out from his place between you and the couch. Flames lick upward from your stomach, and you watch through hooded eyes as Miche crouches to give Remy another pat on the head. He mutters something to the little dog, snickering as tiny claws scratch over his knee, then he’s upright again and reaching for the doorknob.

He really has you convinced that he’s just gonna leave like that, kiss you like he owns you then stride back out without another glance at you, but you should know better at this point, shouldn’t look so relieved when he pivots back around and demands more than asks, “Let me take you to dinner.” You blink. “Not tonight, obviously, but soon. Some place without sandwiches or liquor.”

“What if I want sandwiches and liquor?” You play.

“Then let me take you somewhere with gourmet sandwiches and liquor.”

You snort. “How fancy,” then tell him, “Thursday nights work best for me,” though you’re pretty sure he already knows that.

“Thursday,” he repeats, and he’s grinning and fumbling for the door handle because he won’t look away from you, and you want to kiss him again, want to kiss him so badly, you can’t stop yourself from skipping over to him and pulling him down for one more.

His palm slides over the small of your back as he bends, pressing your body harder against his so that you let out a happy little sigh and murmur against his lips, “Thursday.”

#miche zacharias x reader #mike zacharias x reader #aot x reader #aot fanfic #snk fanfic #mels find a way

138 notes · View notes

yamagucji · 4 years ago

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some tips for writing blogs, especially those who are just starting out. these are some things that works for me and may or may not work for others.

how to add a read more link on mobile

type :readmore: on a free space, then hit the enter or return button

personally i think they’re very helpful because it lessens the space you take up in your dash, and might encourage more people to rb

+ you can also add this on a spot where it gives a sort of cliffhanger, essentially making people want to ‘read more’

headers, banners, and dividers

though not necessary, it’s good to have a title for your work. make sure it’s bold and doesn’t blend in with your notes (aka pairing, warnings, etc.). this also helps when someone wants to look up one of your works in your search bar

i don’t really make banners or covers for my works. but some good apps that i know of would be picsart and canva. if you’re looking for ideas, i definitely recommend going into canva

wondering how to make those really small, thin dividers? you can make them using picsart! to make a divider hit tools > free crop > brush > size (adjust it to your preference > then draw a line along the edge of your photo > save

using the divider you just saved, go back to picsart and edit it again > draw option > hit rainbow square at the bottom left corner > hit suction/droplet symbol right below the check mark > color in the white spots bc for some reason picsart glitches and makes dividers look white-ish

new blog? just opened an account?

this is gonna sound really frustrating. but... tumblr needs to check if you’re a bot or not. what does this mean? it’s likely that your first few posts won’t show up on the search bar. you may not even get to edit your header/pfp yet ://

this happened to me and there was no visibility on my account at ALL. what helped me get ‘verified’ is that i followed a LOT of accounts, liked a bunch of posts, made some posts here and there. now that lets tumblr know you’re not a bot

visibility

the tumblr tagging system usually only allows the first 5 tags in your post to show up. so, what can do you about this? only use FIVE or less tags in your post. wait about 15 minutes or more until you can add some more tags in your post, and they usually all show up like that

another important thing about using tags is not to generalize! especially if you’re using a popular tag. but also don’t specify it too much where barely anyone looks it up. for example, if you’re writing a gn piece about oikawa, i recommend you use the tags such as: oikawa x reader, haikyuu x reader, oikawa x gn!reader, haikyuu headcanons, etc

a good rule of thumb is to use character x reader tags first, then leave the full name or fandom tag last

FOR NSFW: tumblr doesn’t let any tags with nsfw show up. so, give your nsfw works another tag. maybe #namegetspicy idk, you figure it out

FOR WARNINGS: especially if you’re a dark content creator, i highly encourage you to add tw:xyz tags. if you already have a warning note at the top then that’s great. but even better for readers who prefer to actually block these tags that way they never get to see it

another important thing to note is that people have different timezones. it helps if you rb your work at a different time of the day, in case people missed it! (icymi) i’ve noticed that reblogging helps to make your post show up in the tags

interaction + feedback

first and foremost, you are not obligated to write for your followers, and neither are your followers obligated to interact with you. remember that everyone has their own individual lives, and they have their own things to do— so do you, too.

make friends! become mutuals with other writers, visit their ask box. i know it can be daunting having to initiate these things, but you might just turn out to have fun! you can’t expect people to interact with you if you’re not interacting (back). it’s... kind of a two way thing yk? no need to be afraid to interact with other writers. oh, and rb other writers works!

pspsps join tag games or do ask games. it’s fun and very interactive

it never hurts to ask for feedback. i usually do this in a more subtle way because i don’t really expect a full on analysis on my works. maybe a little, is this okay? or feedback appreciated. sometimes it takes a little bit of coaxing for the silent readers

formatting your posts and blog

i generally put in the title at the top in big, bold letters

then comes the header/divider. helps to make the post more... visually appealing ig?

it’s important to add warnings (if any) and the pairing. the audience is not all female, and it might be a little frustrating for male readers having to find out its an x fem reader piece like halfway through your fic

if you have multiple works posted, it’s really really helpful to have a navigation page!

you can organize the posts you make with tags! for example, if you’re shitposting, you can use a specific tag for that. if you have a nsfw related post (ESPECIALLY when your blog is open to the general audience) please make a tag for it

themes + colors

if you have a color in mind but don’t know which direction to go from there, i recommend looking up color + aesthetic

looking to use the same color? download a name color app that’ll give you a hex code for any color you want to use. then, you can type in that hex code for when you’re choosing a color for your tumblr bio

wondering how to make your header image small like mine? just choose a photo for your header and turn off the stretch image option

want to use a different text color that tumblr doesn’t offer? it’s not as complicated as you think. you’ll have to go on a desktop to do this and do some html (but trust me, it’s not very difficult). look up “HTML noob but trying my best - how to use colored text on desktop”

^^ i don’t have the link for the color text tutorial so you can try looking it up

how to make an aesthetic navi and masterlist

step 1: decide a theme! if you’re stuck, think about a character + color/season/mood or look up “[insert] aesthetic” to find some inspiration. or you can try looking at other blogs too

step 2: find a color scheme! it’s easier if you choose fewer colors. if you want to use the same color for both divider and text, download a color name app in order to get the hex code of that color.

step 3: add categories to your navi! most navigation pages include a link to masterlist, about/byi, and rules. your navi should have a title that indicates that it’s... a navigation page. you can add thin colored dividers with the same color to make it easier for followers to navigate

step 4: you can choose to create a ‘cover’ or a picture for your navigation and masterlist! again, i recommend you use the canva app as a starting point

extra: search up emoticon symbols to spice up your titles!

reminder for you as a writer

you’re not obligated to do any of these things. i’ve noticed that we tend to build pressure on ourselves when it comes to content and interaction. remember, this !! is !! for !! fun !! when you realize that it’s no longer fun, then know that it’s time to take a break. and there’s nothing wrong with a bit of self care.

^^ c/p from this post lol

at the end of the day, follower count and interaction doesn’t define you. again for the love of beings, you’re here on your own accord.

will be adding more if needed/asked.

#cupid; talks!#cueuepid

1K notes · View notes

binniesthighs · 4 years ago

Text

❆on a winter’s day | reader x hyunjin |❆

Pairing: self insert, female reader x hwang hyunjin

Genre: the fluffiest smut

Tags: confident!reader, shy!hyunjin, extrovert!reader, introvert!hyunjin, virgin!hyunjin, dancer!reader, dancer!hyunjin minho and jisung side characters, minsung if you turn your head upside down, slow burn, that sweet sweet build up, first time, meet cute, college au, sexual tension, mentions of food, praising, oral (m&f recieving), marking, fingering (f recieving), protected sex, aftercare, hyunjin is the softest boi in this one

Word count: 4.3k

Requested: By a lovely anon! You can read the original ask/post right before this one!

“and five, six, seven, eight!”

The cool of the hardwood flooring beneath your tired heels squeaked from the movement of twenty dancers throwing their bodies to the left. Each and every one of you were reflected in the mirror in front of you: bodies twisting like the curl of a ribbon and arms outstretched. You winced as your knee hit the ground and you hurled your body into a type of somersault. As soon as you were back on your feet, you bent your spine backwards reaching out as far behind you as you could. For a couple moments, the whole world was turned upside down.

It was then when you saw him. His silver hair was tied up, and his brow glistened with sweat. There was nothing else in his eyes other than pure focus.

It was breathtaking.

one, two, you counted in your head.

Next came the hardest part.

Everyone leapt in sync, creating a resonating thud once you all landed.

Thank God that you landed it that time. To your right, your friend Minho scoffed slightly, likely teasing you for finally jumping at the same time as everyone else.

three, four

The group crashed down to the floor again, this time you had to use all your strength to roll, then pull yourself up without help from your hands. You had been practicing it for weeks.

You could feel Minho’s eyes boring into you while you attempted.

You were able to do it, but it wasn’t nearly as fluid as him. How had you never noticed how amazingly his body flowed?

“and five, six!” Your instructor clapped. The music faded as you all sunk down to the floor again, trying to make it appear as if you were dissipating into it. “Very good job everyone!” She beamed and applauded you all who finally let your heaving breaths be heard. “Excellent improvement from you all!”

You couldn’t even stand up from the floor you were so exhausted. The aggressive florescent lights burned your eyes and you considered taking a nap right there.

“You did it!” A foot kicked you. Looming over you were your two friends Minho and Jisung shoving towels onto each other’s faces. “Were you counting like I told you to do?” Minho expectantly leaned in.

“yes,” You answered a little annoyed, not as much at him, but at yourself. You could have done even better.

“We told you that you could do it. It’s just the mental block man.” Jisung offered you a hand up.

Once you were vertical again, a little wave of dizziness hit you.

“Wanna go out to celebrate?”

Your usual friend group circled around you with their bags in hand.

“Finally got it this time, L/n?” They patted you on the back. Besides hip-hop being your specialty in a contemporary class, you still seemed to get along with everyone easily. On the first day of class when you literally announced that you didn’t want to be there, everyone warmed up to you pretty quickly. You didn’t want to lie and pretend that you were all about throwing your body around like that. Of course you thought contemporary was beautiful, just not your thing. Graduation requirements said otherwise.

“Do you need me to carry you outta here?” Jisung joked at your dazed expression. Truthfully, your head was still spinning a little.

“Only very certain people get to carry me Han Jisung, and unfortunately you are not one of them.” You quipped back, and a few of your friends snarked chuckles at him.

He put his hands up in defeat. “I was just offering.”

Across the room, your eyes found him again. He had put his bag a bit of ways away from everyone else’s. He guzzled down his water, bobbing his sharp Adam’s apple. He then tore his hair tie out and ruffled his hair around which was damp at the roots. Everything that he did was so effortless.

“Hey,” you nudged Minho, “You know who he is?”

“Him? That’s Hwang Hyunjin. I dunno much about him, he’s pretty quiet, I haven’t heard much about him within the school either. Amazing dancer though. Have you seen him?”

“Yeah...”

Hyunjin pulled a black pullover past his head.

“You coming with us?” Minho snapped you back.

“No-uh, I think that I’m gonna stay a little while.”

“Suit yourself, I know that it’s gonna be delicious.” He teased and turned to throw his arm around Jisung while the group walked out.

The silvery-haired boy zipped up his bag as if he was near leaving. Your throat became unexplainably tight. Your legs started moving towards him before you could tell them to.

“You popped up behind him. “Hyunjin, right?”

He whipped around startled, with his gorgeous brown eyes widening. “...yes?”

“I wanted to tell you that I saw you dancing today and you’re really good. It looks like its so easy for you. I wish that I could be like that.”

“Oh...thank you.” He gave you a kind smile.

shit, he was so cute.

“Soooo, what’s your secret?” You attempted to keep him there for just a moment longer.

“My secret?” His eyes became puzzled.

“Yeah, like, to how you’ve gotten so good?”

“I just...practice.”

“Huh...”

The door to the practice room clicked one last time and the two of you were alone.

“I noticed that all of your moves flow really nicely to the next, you’re not stiff at all, it’s like your body never stops evolving with the motions.”

“thank you...” Hyunjin hushed shyly and twiddled with his hair.

“Maybe you could teach me? Teach me how to make my technique better? I’m just so robotic sometimes.”

“...sure.” He hesitantly said with a growing tiny grin. “Like right now?”

“Oh! I mean it doesn’t have to be right now right now, just like when you have some time I was thinking.”

“I have a little time right now.” He began taking off his coat which he had just put on.

“Oh really?” You felt your cheeks get a little warm. You certainly weren’t expecting him to say yes so quickly.

“Do-do you have time?” He worriedly asked.

“--Yeah!”

“Okay...let’s get started then.”

✦✧✦✧

The music from Hyunjin’s phone echoed over the speakers and you attempted the twirls again. You were able to execute the timing, but each one felt more inelastic than the last. God, your whole body was aching to stop, but it couldn’t get enough of the feeling of him watching you and observing your every movement.

“What should I change about it this time?” You struggled to take in breaths.

Hyunjin looked you up and down, with that same focus from before. With someone as picturesque as him, he looked a little stern when he examined you, which scared you a little, but excited you at the same time.

“You need to take the strain out of your hips, they’re geting in the way you need to let you whole body fall into it. Focus on your legs. Like this:”

He spun in front of you with his leg pointed out. With the twist of his body his silver hair swept along with him.

“You know what I mean?” He gently asked.

“--yes, I think so.”

“Your hips are your anchor, but don’t let them stop you.” Hyunjin stepped up closer to you, hesitantly going to grab your waist with his hands. It was then when you realized how big and powerful they were. His sudden gesture made your heart beat even faster than it already was.

“Pivot like...this.” He turned you a little to the left.

“Oh.”

He lead your hips into the pivot a couple more times to show you. His hands were so warm.

He quickly removed his hands, embarrassed, like he had been doing something he should not have been. He walked away from you and you took notice of his shoulder blades curving under the thin fabric of his sleeveless shirt.

“Do you wanna stop now? I think I’ve done as much as I can for today.”

He nodded and removed his phone from the sound system.

✦✧✦✧

Outside of the arts building, snow had picked back up again after flurrying the whole night long. Everything around had been covered in a beautiful blanket of white.

“Well, I’m headed off this way.” You head nodded to your bus station a couple blocks down. “Thank you for helping me by the way.”

“For sure! I...liked helping you out.”

“Really?”

Hyunjin immediately made a startled little face upon realizing what he had said and you laughed a little at him.

He pulled his chunky scarf up higher to his chin. “Actually...I um, live down that way too.”

“Do you take the 12 bus too?”

He nodded. Little snowflakes had begun to get caught in his hair like a little halo.

“Well then let’s get going! We don’t wanna miss the last bus!”

✦✧✦✧

It was rush hour, so naturally the two of you had to stand on the bus of packed people. The air inside was chilly and it smelled of old dusty coats that had just recently been taken out for the fist snow. You thought it was a little funny how every five seconds or so someone would sniffle in there.

“I’ve seen you in class too.” Hyunjin finally said something after a while of you two being pushed pretty close next to eachother. “Dancing and other stuff, everyone really seems to like you, you’re really good at making people laugh.”

“Oh. Thanks.” You didn’t quite know how to respond to him. “I don’t really have a problem putting myself out there much, I’ve always really believed in just being me, you know? And not letting others determine who I am around them. That or maybe I just like the sound of my own voice.”

He giggled a little then pulled the string nearby the window.

stop requested. The robot bus voice said.

“You’re not stalking me or anything are you?” You rose an eyebrow at him, which scared him more that you had expected.

“No..? What do you mean?”

“This is my stop too.”

Your boots crunched into the snow of the side walk and you thanked the bus driver. Hyunjin got off after you with his hands in his pockets. The two of you stood there in the snow for a moment, something weirdly unsaid lingering between the two of you. Something felt unfinished but you couldn’t quite figure out what it was. He genuinely was so sweet, you sneakily wanted to be around him for just a little longer.

Hyunjin stammered, but confidently got out, “Do you want to get something to eat? Right now?”

It was if he had read your mind. You were glad that he had asked, and a little surprised too. He waited attentively for you to answer, still looking a little nervous; even looking like that he was terribly adorable.

“I’d love to.” You smiled back at him causing him to sigh in relief.

“Is there anywhere that you like?” He led the both of you on.

You pondered for a moment, then remembered. You cringed out the words, “Actually...I really shouldn’t be spending money right now; I need to get a lot better at saving...”

You almost slapped yourself in the face after saying such a thing and seeing how crestfallen he had become. It was true, but technically he didn’t need to know that.

“Or! I mean, we could go to my place and I could I dunno, whip something up? I should have something...”

“Are you sure? I mean, I don’t want to be eating away your food.”

“No really! It’s fine, come on, I’m just down this block.”

✦✧✦✧

It was only seconds before you opened the door to your apartment that you remembered how embarrassingly messy it was. You and your two roommates were the best of friends, but horribly matched when it came to being cleanly. The three of you just chalked it up to you all being “creative minds.” You all went to arts school after all.

“Just...don’t look--sorry, it’s really messy in there, I wasn’t really expecting to bring anyone over.”

“I don’t care.” Hyunjin politely said and watched you unlock the door.

“We just call it creative madness.”

When you walked in even you tried hard to not look at the mess and got straight to work rummaging around your cabinets.

“Does spaghetti with sauce sound good?”

He nodded and neatly arranged his coat, shoes and bag at the door.

He wandered over to the large windows of your living area. “You have a really nice view.”

“Ah thanks,” You clicked on the stove. “Makes the price of the rent worth it,” you lowered your voice “fuckin’ swindlers.”

Your eyes wandered to the island in your kitchen full of all kinds of crap: baking supplies, art supplies, old mail, textbooks, mismatched pairs of gloves.

“It would probably be best if we ate in my room,” You let up. “You can barely sit here.”

Hyunjin nodded and turned to keep watching the snow peacefully. While you cooked, he didn’t say much but you couldn’t keep his eyes off of him, nearly burning yourself on the saucepan. He changed the room by just merely exisiting in it. You truly couldn’t imagine how you had never noticed him before.

✦✧✦✧

“Thank you for cooking for me, that was really good.”

You waved his compliment off with the swipe of your hand. “It’s really nothing, you should see my roommate, she’s a culinary science major. Wait! Let me go get something real quick.”

You smiled at your little surprise and shuffled back to the kitchen, putting the two little raspberry and chocolate cupcakes on plates with equally little forks.

“Ta-da! These are to die for. I wish I could take the credit; these are just one of the benefits of having a roommate that’s constantly experimenting.”

Hyunjin took in a careful bite and his eyes widened into moons.

“I know right!? She’s a genius.”

Silence filled the air between you as you ate more. You couldn’t help but feel so completely and utterly cozy in the moment. The sun had nearly set and you had set your heater up in your room along with some Christmas music to softly play in the background. The only regret that you had was the candle you had lit which was just a little too sweet. You started to wonder after you two had finished, what would happen next? Would he leave? Greedily, a feeling seeped into you like before, you still didn’t want him to leave.

“That was amazing.” He placed his plate down.

“You know what?” Your brash confidence pushing through once more. “Your hair, the silver, it’s just so pretty. I can’t stop looking at it.”

He instantly became flustered. “Oh...thank you, I’ve been thinking about dying it like this for a really long time now and I finally did it. It sounds kinda dumb, but I didn’t wanna do anything that would draw attention to myself.”

“...can I touch it?”

Hyunjin looked a little shocked, but eagerly nodded.

You started by thumbing through some of the longer strands towards his shoulders: it was just as soft as you imagined. You then started from the top running your hand all the way down, admiring the way that it looked like it shimmered a little. You had gotten so caught up in him that you didn’t notice that he had closed his eyes.

“pretty.” You cooed.

“Y/n?” He suddenly asked.

“Hmm?”

“Is it weird to say that I feel like really comfortable around you? Is that weird?”

“No, not at all.” You continued running your hands through the silver strands, somehow you had leaned in a lot closer to him than you had been before.

He looked at you with his doe-like brown eyes. You could have sworn that they were glistening. Your eyes fell a little lower to his lips, they looked wonderfully kissable and plump. From that moment your brain furiously wondered what they tasted like. His eyes fell a little too.

He leaned in first, catching you completely off guard. He kissed you so carefully and gently, his mouth parted just slightly; it was heavenly. You could still taste the chocolate and the raspberry on his lips. He sighed a little into your mouth like he was relaxing himself. In many ways, the way in which he kissed you made you feel like he cared for nothing else in the world, just you. Your cupped his face in your hands, tracing your thumbs against his jawline.

That was it. You were absolutely crazy for him.

You broke for a moment and he turned into a huge, rosy, smiling mess. The two of you giddily giggled at how happy you were over what had just happened. You shuffled your own plate off the bed to silently invite him to lay down which he did obediently. Now he seemed less hesitant, but more excited.

You swung your legs around both sides of him and kissed him more on his smiling lips. At this point, you had convinced yourself that nothing in this world was sweet as him. His hands found their way to your back, where he ran his fingers down, making you shiver delightfully at the touch. His hands finally found your waist which he grabbed onto firmly. He pulled you down into him so your bodies were flush and you could feel all of his warmth. Once you were this close, he started kissing you back more wantonly, gasping a little in between.

“You’re so beautiful Hyunjinnie.” You snuck in between kisses. “I can’t get enough of you.”

He let an airy laugh fall into your lips then brought one of his hands to tangle in you hair. All at once, your hands yearned to explore the soft of his skin everywhere. Outside your window the snow still silently fell and the golden sunset faded into the skyline’s horizon.

You knew how excited you had become, where together your hips grinded together. Your head spun thinking about having someone as beautiful as him give your body attention.

Hyunjin broke, holding your eyes seriously. “I-I want to make you feel good. Can I do that?”

“Of course, I would love that.” You melted.

“--But...I think you’ll have to tell me how...I haven’t done this before, sorry..”

The fact that he had shared this with you made him even more adorable.

“Don’t apologize, I can show you everything.” You whispered into his ear with a prideful grin. “But first, can I first help you?”

He gulped, “Yes.”

“I want to show you that you’re worth the attention, you’re worth all of it.”

You helped him pull off his sweater, and then his sleeveless shirt revealing his toned and pale chest, just waiting for your lips. You didn’t want to move too fast however, or risk scaring him.

“Just relax okay?”

You planted kisses everywhere you could: on his collarbones, his stomach and on his ribs, right over his heart. Even from the simplest of touches from you he seemed to unravel.

“You’re breathtaking.” You said onto his skin.

You couldn’t stop yourself from sucking a little harder than you planned, drawing little purple marks against his milky-white skin. He looked like pure art.

“Can I go down a little further?”

“Mmhmm.” He got out, with eyes closed shut trying to control himself.

You slipped his joggers down, revealing his quivering member, which was enticingly long even hidden by his briefs. He had already stained them a little with pre cum.

“oh my god.” you whispered, enamored. You couldn’t wait a single second further.

He timidly watched as you completely striped him, then tore off our own shirt and pants to make it a little more even.

“Tell me stop if you want me to, okay?”

He pleaded with desperate eyes, “Don’t stop.”

First you teased him just a little by running your tongue flat up and down and around his length, wetting your tongue with one hand and slowly pumping. You moved on to then twist around the head which had grown painfully hard. His breaths wavered and he let out little moans in desperation. You took him in at last, bobbing your head steadily.

“ mmm, that feels so good.” Hyunjin moaned out breathlessly.

You kept on, but not for too much longer, you didn’t want him finishing quite yet. He looked a little dejected when you stopped, but you swooped up to kiss him more. You took up his left hand and kissed him all the way up to his wrist and into his palm. His fingertips brushed over your lips, as gentle as one would with a flower petal.

“You want to touch me now?”

“--Yes.”

You unclipped your bra for him and laid back. For this he didn’t need any instruction. He immediately took your breast in his hand, squeezing and and ghosting his fingertips over your nipples; you reveled under his touch. He lowered to suck lightly on the bud, pulling at it lightly with his lips. His teeth grazed you slightly but you didn’t care, you fucking loved it.

“That feels amazing.” You whispered as you watched him. He was sure to give both of your nipples attention.

“I want you.” You said with hot breath. “I want your tongue.”

He looked a little bewildered, but determined after what you had said. He slid down your body, giving you kisses the whole way down like you had done to him.

He nibbled a bit on your thighs. “Tell me how you like it.”

By the second his confidence grew more and more and it was addicting.

You started by rubbing yourself a little so he knew where to start. “In circles, you can go fast or slow, I like both, and you can suck on it too if you’d like.

He lowered, and you swung one of you legs over his shoulder which he palmed into. He started painfully slow, kitten licking carefully; he didn’t know it, but he was teasing the hell out of you. Nevertheless, you whole body began to shake a little with each lick.

“Flatten your tongue out...like that, you can go a little faster, yes...just like that.”

He had closed his eyes and settled into a rhythm, and you dug your heels into the bed. It was astonishing how quickly he got the hang of it. You whimpered out while he continued.

“fuck, Hyunjin--”

He sped up a little, your first orgasm was close by.

“Your fingers, like this.” You held up your pointer and middle together to show him. “Fuck me like that.

He did as he was told, sliding them in with ease over how wet you had become. His fingers were long and slender; addictive. He pumped in and out while your pussy made ungodly sounds. You felt so close you were lightheaded.

“Curl your fingers up, like this.” You showed him again. He continued going fast, taking a hint from your quickened breaths.

You came with white heat, clawing at the comforter on the bed. You only gave yourself a few more moments before pulling him up towards you. “I want you inside me.”

You scrambled with the drawer of your nightstand to rip a condom off from the strand that you kept, tearing it open for him. He was a little flustered, but put it on quickly; he was dripping even more for you. Your lips connected as you laid down, and he aligned himself on top of you. It was then when you saw how pink his chest had flushed. You opened your folds for him, and he started to guide himself in. He filled you up perfectly, and he groaned out once the two of you were connected.

“it’s so tight.” He shivered.

Your fingers latched on to the skin of his hips as you guided him lightly up and down. He buried his face into your shoulder as little euphoric moans slipped past his lips. After a moment, he was able to find his pace, grazing you deep inside. You let him take control as he thrust into you, leaving your arms to wrap around his broad back. You pulled his face over to kiss him, the both of you loosing yourself in the other.

“You make me feel, so, so good, baby,” You hushed into his ear.

He panted, “I-I’m gonna cum soon.”

It took all your strength to flip him off of you, and to land in his lap. He groaned with his hands getting lost journeying all around your body--anywhere he could touch. You took over, riding him and rolling your hips fast with both of your palms flat on his chest riddled with hickies. Like this, you thought that he looked practically angelic. Both of you chased your orgasms together, erupting at nearly the same time, and you ravished in him throbbing inside.

You laughed a little together in sheer bliss and he flinched a little when you slid off of him.

“Did that all feel good for you? Are you okay?” You pecked his nose.

“Yes. It felt like nothing else.”

You stood up, adjusting your frazzled hair and putting on a fresh set of comfy clothes. “Stay right there okay?”

You went to grab him a towel and clean himself off with, handing him his clothes one by one as he dressed. You brought the plates back to the kitchen coming back with a large glass of ice cool water, then offered it to him. He guzzled it letting a little drop fall down his neck.

“Can I get you anything else?”

“No, I’m okay.”

“Do you wanna...stay a little longer?”

“Right now?”

“Right now.”

You blew the candle out and dimmed the lights, adjusting a blanket for the two of you to crawl under. Hyunijn followed you under, sweeping you deep into his arms.

Just a little bit longer. You thought to yourself. Stay with me.

701 notes · View notes

jemmo · 2 years ago

Text

reveal your watch & rewatch drama list

ty to the always lovely @snimeat for tagging me and letting me rant about the gays for a hot minute (bc let’s be real what else do i watch) 💕

watching:

21 days theory - i picked this one up bc it was there and i have time to fill while i’m off work and it was enemies to lovers so… gotta say so far im not hating it and i think the leads are cute, i just don’t care for any of this side character straightness i feel happening, hoping there’s less of that going forwards

even sun - still haven’t finished this bc what even is this show. it’s just such a weird watch and i still am not fully sure what’s going on but hey bounprem are on screen and doing stuff??? i guess???? but if this was to tide me over until between us, it didn’t work

his man - this i didn’t expect to get into bc im not normally a reality tv fan but man am i invested. something about how shy and almost awkward they all are around each other and now slowly becoming more comfortable and getting closer, it’s just so fun to watch and i cant stop my stupid grin the whole time. also changyu supremacy

mama gogo - this is one of the first non-bl gmmtv shows I’ve followed week to week and omg am i glad I have. It’s just so much fun, the characters and their storylines are fun and interesting, the dancing is cheesy but you can tell they’re just having the best time and i have cried at multiple eps. just so much heart in such a fun series, i love it here

merry queer - very behind on this but it’s an interesting watch and i just wanna support what it’s doing. but also hani

minato shouji coin laundry - oh my beloved. this show has wormed its way into my heart and set up shop there. i might just be a little bit obsessed with shin and his bold, forthright flirting and how he can go from so confident and driven to so hurt and in need of love and attention. and i think the story they’re telling is very interesting, esp with minato and how he shows this post-high school queer experience that we rarely ever see, and how those experiences affect you going into adulthood. plus it’s just cute and soft and the vibes are so welcome, it’s a show i wanna snuggle

the eclipse - what else needs to be said. confident rebel gay meets uptight golden-boy gay panic in a enemies to lovers plot shrouded in supernatural mystery and system oppression. sign me the fuck up. can’t wait to see first and khao act their asses off and have their moment to shine.

vice versa - whenever im watching this show im just having the best time and that’s what i love. jimmy and sea are just the most adorable pair to watch and the series has such lovely styling and cinematography and a vibe that’s so considered and adds to the atmosphere and story so much that i can’t not be in love with it. and im so ready to dive deeper into what this story is gonna give us

war of Y - this is kind of messy but it’s too early for me to tell if it’s in a good or bad way yknow?? i didn’t watch scoy nor do i know much about it but the mains seem to have good chemistry, but also we’ve kind of just been thrown in to this world where stuff is happening and it’s kind of hard to understand what everyone’s deal is, esp when you can’t read any of the texts and such

extraordinary attorney woo - back in kdrama land! watched ep 1 a couple of days ago bc my sister wants my mom to watch it and it was cute, so yay for a good family watch

bad buddy - i can’t believe we’ve made it to this point, but both my sisters only have ep 12 to watch now and then the big bad buddy rewatch and experience for them is over. it’s been so much fun sharing this with ppl and reliving everything I felt for those 12 weeks through them again. god i miss it so much and this show will never not impress and move and amaze me, you wonderful creature

my only 12% - this was a cute surprise actually. i have no clue where the story is going bc I’ve gone in blind but santaearth have a fantastic dynamic and act so naturally with each other that it’s just fun to watch even when nothing is really happening.

starting soon:

the only thing i’ll be starting soon is whatever i try to get my sisters to watch after bad buddy. the current candidates are probably blueming, to my star and maybe kinnporsche if i can handle watching that content with someone else (but my sisters are both smut fic writers, it’s water off a fucks back to them) but any recs or votes are welcome lol

i know im late on this one but I’ll just tag @seeking-moonscapes @talaypuens and @dribs-and-drabbles so i can peek at what your watching and your thoughts on them bc im nothing if not nosy 😁😁

#i should rlly start tagging these game things but I’m so lazy with that kind of stuff #ugh #tag games #i guess #but also I love having so much to watch at the moment #and I’ve been re-binging stuff bc I have free time and it’s just like #i love being in my cozy queer media bubble

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eeunoia · 4 years ago

Text

ENHYPEN Mini Series

E N H Y P E N as Campus Heart-throbs

pairings: kim sunoo x reader

summary: what will happen when an extrovert campus social butterfly met an introvert?

word count: 6.2k

a/n: OKAY FORGIVE ME. I know it took so long for me to upload this but please try to understand me. School stressed me out and happen to ate all of my time. I’ll try to do better, enjoy! So, Sunoo’s stroy will be the most chill out of them all. Sunghoon’s story gave me a lot of stress while writing it while Sunoo’s didn’t. I enjoyed writing this one because I think they’re really cute. 🌸

tag list: @jakeysim @kpoppinandlockin @en-sun @f1iore @dilfhwa @rubyanne @enhappy

Kim Sunoo

Class 2 - A - “The Social Butterfly”

Being a natural born introvert, it sure is difficult for you to deal with other people. It’s not that you hate them or anything, you just simply prefer being alone than to be surrounded by a bunch of people.

You hate being the center of attention so standing in front of the class right is really uncomfortable for you. With faces very unfamiliar for you, you fiddled your fingers unconsciously.

“introduce yourself, please.” the teacher sounds nice despite the awkward situation. You gulped as you tried to roam your eyes around. The students in front of you have different expressions in their faces. Some looks interested, some looked like they don’t really care and some looked clueless.

“I’m y/n. Please, take care of me.” you even bowed after saying it.

Sunoo eyes settled at you. It’s not always that he’d been interested to other people, specially to new comers. But something in you really captured his attention.

“So everyone, let’s welcome, y/n. She’s new in our town so make sure to make her comfortable, okay?” the homeroom teacher told the whole class and they answered, ‘yes’ in unison.

You were asked to take a seat at the vacant one at the middle. Sunoo smiled and removed his backpack at the vacant seat to welcome you. On the other hand, you haven’t noticed him yet. Your head was hanging low avoiding any eye contact from everybody.

As you sat down, Sunoo have a wide smile over his lips already excited to chat with you. “Y/n, right?” he didn’t actually need to double check your name. He knew your name very well since he listened well from a while ago.

Your eyes railed over to him, “yeah.” you answered shortly then quickly looked away. You’re not really used having eye contact with other people. It makes you feel uncomfortable for some reason. But even with a short glance, you noticed how beautiful his eyes were.

“I’m Sunoo! Kim Sunoo!” he sounded so cheerful. You gave him a small nod as you fished your notebook from your bag when the teacher said she’ll start the discussion.

Sunoo pouted at your cold response but pulled off a smile back, he thought it’s normal to react that way since he’s still a stranger to you. It’s just a little odd how you just shut him off that fast. He’s used to being liked by other people right away so the way you reacted was a really different.

“Please open your text book in page 156.” your hand stopped fiddling with your pen when you realize you didn’t picked up your text books yet. Sunoo noticed your expression right away and slid his text book between the two of you.

Your eyes trailed over his textbook then to him. You blush a little seeing his smiling face beside you. You were wondering what he is smiling so brightly about? “We can share, y/n!” you blushed more when you saw how cute he looked. You cleared your throat and looked away from him blinking your eyes.

“U-Uh thanks.” you were so shy but you have no choice but to share with him. You still didn’t have your text book so you’re somehow thankful he’s nice enough to offer sharing his.

The discussion went pretty well. He didn’t really bother you all throughout the lesson, well he did tried opening up conversations from time to time but he still let you listen to the teacher. He is cute, you’re not gonna lie.

You were alone as you went towards the school cafeteria. It’s lunch break and you wanted to buy a meal because you’re already hungry. Some eyes followed you in curiosity, probably wondering who you are since you’re new. You didn’t bother looking at them because you’re used to being new to a school. This isn’t the first time you transferred to a new school.

As you silently wait for your turn to buy your food, you noticed that their cafeteria is pretty spacious. It’s perfect to handle a lot of students. Compared to your previous school, this one is much more of a good school.

“Hi, Sunoo!” you heard somebody from behind you said. You didn’t look back or anything. You’re pretty sure he isn’t the only Sunoo in the school right? This is a big school so there’s a possibility that he’s not the Sunoo who sit beside you is big, right?

You saw how some students in front of you turned their heads by hearing the name. It’s like they’re curious or something. Once they saw who it was, their eyes sparkles. Specially the girls.

“Y/n!” your head turned over to the side when you heard someone called my name.

It was your seat-mate, Kim Sunoo. He was smiling brightly at you and with an awkward smile, you greeted him. You’re not really sure what’s going on but the students around you were obviously watching. Feeling conscious, you roamed your eyes around. They were looking at the two of you with wonder in their eyes.

“Do you want to join us in our table? I’ll go save you a seat.” he sounded so excited as he said those words to you.

Some of the students near you heard his invitation and their mouth fell a bit open. Sunoo’s known for being a social butterfly, yeah. He’s nice to everybody and very approachable. But he never invites people to eat lunch with him, specially he never offer to save seat to someone! It’s beyond what he usually do.

He doesn’t know what got into him as well. All he know is that he wants to know you more. He can’t just stop being curious of you. Is it because you’re such a mysterious person or maybe because he have nothing else to do? Nah. Whatever it is, he wants to get closer to you.

“U-Uh, that’s okay. I’m just here to buy a drink because I already ate lunch.” you reasoned out. You kind of felt bad for lying to him but you don’t really have a choice. You feel like you’re in a bad situation if you agree to eat with him.

His brows furrowed in confusion, “Huh? I didn’t saw you eat here?” his lips were pursed as he waits for your answer.

“I have packed lunch.” you told him just so he can leave you alone.

You saw how his shoulder fell but he pulled off another bright smile, “You can get a drink in the vending machine so you don’t have to wait for so long.”

Your eyes trailed over to the vending machine that he’s pointing. You almost let out a curse when he said that. With a nod, you moved away from the line and went to the vending machine to buy a drink.

After buying one, Sunoo offered if he can join you but one student halt him to talk. You felt relieved because finally, you can go. Without even saying goodbye, you left the scene.

You head your way over to the garden, you’re still not very familiar with the whole campus but you saw the garden on your way to the cafeteria. As expected, there’s only a few students here. It’s lunch time so everyone’s probably having their meals.

You let out a sigh as you heard your stomach grumble in hunger. You can’t believe you will skip lunch just because you don’t want to be in that kind of situation.

Sunoo’s smiling face appeared inside your head. A small guilt flickered over you. You know he’s just being friendly and maybe really just trying to make your feel comfortable since you’re new and trying to adjust. But it's not really your personality to became so friendly to strangers easily. You don’t feel comfortable about it.

You opened the random drink that you got from the vending machine and drink it. You have no other choice. You’re really starving but can’t go back to the cafeteria to buy food. Sunoo’s probably there and what will he feel if he knew that the real reason why you lied to him is because you don't want to eat with him?

You laid your head over to the table as you tried to just sleep to forget about your hunger. Minutes passed and your stomach still ache because hunger when suddenly, somebody put something at the table.

Your head raised right away feeling surprised. You're pretty sure you’re far from other students here in the garden so you’re wondering who it was.

Your brows furrowed when you saw Sunoo in front of you. He’s holding this paper bag and he’s now taking out some food. When you two met eyes you saw how his eyes smiled together with his lips.

“It’s not good to skip lunch, specially if you have class later.” he said and gave you some chopsticks to help you eat.

“I-I...” you don’t know what to say.

To see him in front of you smiling made you blush. Is he really this nice? Can somebody be really this nice to a stranger? Well you two aren’t really a complete stranger since you basically know each other's name. But still, you both don’t know much about each other.

"You should eat.” he said chuckling and even handed you a water.

You gulped and blushed really hard. He probably think you’re so stupid for lying or probably think you’re so rude for lying just to avoid eating with him.

“Hey, y/n. Are you okay? Is it the food? You don’t like it?” now, he sounded so worried.

You quickly snapped your head up to meet his eyes. “N-No! I liked it. It’s just I feel bad for lying t-to you.” you bit your lips because you felt embarrassed because of what you did and because of stuttering.

His pout slowly turned into a smile, "Nah, it's okay! I understand. I’m sorry for putting you into that awkward situation.” he started eating his food. Yeah he brought his food here too so you two can eat together. You don’t know but that somehow made something warm spread to your system.

You gave him a small nod, don’t really know what to tell him. You thought to yourself that he’s just so nice and guilt once again took over you.

“I figured out you still don’t feel comfortable with the people around you since you’re new. I heard you’re new to the town too.” he started the conversation. You started to aid your hunger by the food Sunoo brought for you. He smiled a little feeling relieved that you’re now eating.

“Yeah, we moved in yesterday.” as much as you’re not a fan of conversating with other people, there’s something with Sunoo just makes you comfortable. It feels like it’s safe to talk to him about anything.

He nodded his head looking at you with amusement. You wanted to chuckle because there’s nothing to be amused about, really. And besides, he looked cute with his cheeks stuffed with food.

“I noticed you’re not really that talkative. Is it because you’re still shy or are you an introvert?” Sunoo then asked still continuing with his food. You looked at him for a while as you eat your food.

“You don’t have to answer if you feel uncomfortable, y/n.” he shrugged his shoulders off assuring you that it’s completely fine. You let out a sigh before drinking from the water bottle that he handed you over a while ago.

“I’m an introvert and I prefer to be by myself most of the times.” you answered.

Sunoo looked thrilled when he heard you answer. Obviously. the two of you were the complete opposite. When Sunoo loves the attention, you’re not really fond of it.

“Why? Doesn’t it make you feel lonely?” he asked you curious. The side of your lips lifted up as you heard him ask that. That’s what people usually thought when someone preferred to be alone.

“Not because you prefer to be by yourself meaning you’re lonely.” His mouth fell open for a bit when he heard that. It sound deep and you looked serious as you said those words.

“Well, you’re right.” he even shrugged his shoulders again then continued eating.

“Do you find it hard to adjust right now since you have to move and now you have a new school?” he asked you. Now that he knew you’re an introvert, he’s actually a bit worried because he knew it will be too hard for you to adjust.

“Not really. This isn’t the first time we moved from one place to another.” you said pretty much easier than you expected you could tell it to anybody. You’re actually a bit surprised how you’re talking to Sunoo like it’s just naturally part of your everyday routine.

Sunoo looked surprised when he heard that. “You moved often? Why?” he asked you sounding so curious. To know that you’re not really new in all of this kind of makes him amused.

“My Dad’s work involve him being physically there so we moved together with him.” you tried to explain the situation in the simplest way you can. He nodded his head, looks like he understands it right away.

With a furrowed brows he once again looked at you, “You can just stay in one place tho? It’s less hassle and can help you save money too. Moving is really expensive.” he said.

You lowered your head. He have a point. It is true that moving is stressful and is very expensive. He’s right about that and the stress from adjusting to another place just adds more to the things you have to worry about.

“I can’t find a place I can feel at home anyway. When we moved to a new place, it remains like that to me. It remains new and I can’t find any reason to stay.” you don’t mean anything about you say. you just randomly voiced out what’s inside your head.

Sunoo somehow felt sad about what he just heard. He don’t know but he sort of saw the loneliness in your eyes. He knows you made it clear that you’re not lonely or anything... but something’s just telling him that you are.

He sighed heavily, making you look at him. “Do you want me to tour you around the campus later after class?” he sounded excited.

You blushed once again seeing him smiling brightly at you. Feeling a bit shy and a burden to Sunoo, you were about to say no to him when the bell suddenly rang. Thankfully, you did finish your food and thanks to Sunoo you won’t attend your classes with an empty stomach,

You stood up now fixing your things so you can leave and go home. The classes are now finished and you’re happy you survived your first day in your new school. You thought it would be stressful but it wasn’t that bad.

“You ready, y/n?” your head snapped towards Sunoo when he approached beside you. He finished fixing his things up pretty quickly. And with a clueless expression you starred at him wondering what he’s talking about.

He playfully rolled his eyes and followed it with a chuckle. He can’t believe you forgot about the tour. Some students from your class watched the two of you interact to each other. They never saw Sunoo act so excitedly before. Yeah he’s always energetic but something in him feels different when he’s around you.

“huh?” you asked still clueless.

“I told you I’ll tour you around the campus after class.” he stated that made you remember what he said before the bell rang.

“oh...” your mind trailed over to the thought of how you can say no to him in the nicest way. Sunoo’s been nothing but nice to you so you don’t want to make him feel upset. Besides, he’s the first friend you’ve made here.

“I s-still have things to do at home so I have to be home early.” you tried making up so he can let you go. You’ve been a bother to him ever since lunch. He even bought you food that you tried to pay but he refused hardly. He told you that it’s his way of welcoming you.

He showed you a poker face, “No you don’t! Stop lying. It’s obvious that you can’t lie.” your mouth fell how he easily figured you out.

“I j-just don’t want to bother you.” finally, you admitted him.

He starred at you for a while before he sighed heavily and smiled at you. He extended his hand and messed your hair a bit.

“Nah, it’s fun spending time with you. I want to know you more so come on!” he didn’t let you say anything more but instead he started pulling your arm. You didn’t have any other choice but to go with Sunoo. Besides, it seems like it’s really gonna be fun.

He was smiling brightly as he tour you around the campus. You were right, it was a beautiful school. Before you even realize it, you were laughing comfortably with Sunoo. It’s almost like you two known each other for a long time.

“Don’t your parents ask you if you’re okay with moving or not?” he asked as he handed you the bubble tea that he just ordered for you. Inside a near cafe, you two decided to stop by and maybe take a rest before going home. Touring around tired both of you.

“They ask me of course. My parents were both nice and they don’t want me to have a hard time.” he was carefully watching you while you’re talking. Having him starring at you is surely making you conscious. So you can’t help but to blush from time to time and look away from him.

“And you always tell them that you’re okay with it?” he asked and reached out his hand over you. You stared down seeing that he’s holding a tissue for you to use. Feeling a bit overwhelmed by his small gestures, a smile unconsciously spreads through your face.

You’re actually surprised by how you’re acting right now as well. To think that you just spent almost 3 hours with a person you just met this morning is a news! You even laughed and talked comfortably with him. What kind of witch-craft is this?

“Yeah, I told you I don’t really find any reason to stay at a place.” that’s one thing that people find strange to you. You’re an introvert and don’t get along with people easily but you’re also okay with changes. You think you adapt pretty much quicker than expected.

“I hope you find a reason to stay here in our town.” he said ending it with his bright smile. You were a bit dumbfounded by what he said and you just felt your heart skipped a bit.

Your week in your new school goes on pretty fine. Eventually, you made some friends and Sunoo remained lurking around you. He often spends time with you and sometimes, people find it odd. They think you two just became too close to each other in a fast pace.

It was just days ago that you heard that Sunoo was really popular in your school. No wonder eyes follows the two of you around. Well, that didn’t even shock you so much since you’ve clearly see how attractive and adorable he is. He’s very nice and really get along with people very well.

“y/n! Do you have an answer in our assignment in physics?” he did this cute voice as he went to his seat which is beside you. He was just outside doing club activities and now he came back.

You smirked and pulled out your notebook to hand it to him. His eyes sparkled at the sight of it and surprisingly hugged you out of excitement. Despite of being nice to everybody, Sunoo rarely makes skin-ship so what he did kind of surprised not just you, but also those students that saw what he just did.

He sat down beside you like nothing just happened and started copying your answers. With a blushing face, you heaved out a sigh and started to divert your attention away from the hug. Yeah, you two were getting close but that was the first time that he hugged you.

“You okay?” he innocently asked when he noticed that your face was tinted red. He furrowed his brows getting a bit worried for you.

“Y-yeah, it’s just hot here.” you tried reasoning out and even used your hand to fan yourself. The crease in his forehead got more deeper as he grabbed his water bottle and handed it to you.

Your eyes dropped over his cute blue water jug, “Here, drink water.” he said and your hand unconsciously get it from him. He smiled and even helped you open the cap but he started copying once again.

You gulped feeling your heart beat faster. What is he doing to you? You were completely confused to what’s happening to you. Honestly you have an answer inside your head but you’re trying to shrug it off. You’re not yet ready to admit that to yourself yet.

“Do you think it will be okay, tho?” he asked you as he placed two drinks at your table. It’s lunch time and you planned to just buy yourself a drink once you place your tray at your table but here he is, he bought two drinks already.

You pouted, blushing once again. Sunoo just takes very good care of you. He really do it to the point that your heart really warms up for him. Sunoo sometimes find it odd too because ever since he met you and became close to you, he started acting like this. Like as if he wanted to be by your side all the time. He started buying things for two people, like for example, right now, he unconsciously bought you a drink as well.

“How much?” you asked him ready to pull some bill from your wallet but he showed you his poker face before opening the drink for you then handed it to you.

“Never mind it and start eating instead.” he said seriously and you just shrugged your shoulders and followed what he said.

You two gradually get back to your normal conversations. Students greets Sunoo from time to time whenever those who knows him (which is a lot) pass by your table. You were slowly getting used to it. Even with those glaring eyes from the girls who have feelings for him were not new to you anymore.

“Where’s Sunoo, y/n? The teachers were looking for him because this is his second day absent.” your head snapped over to one of your classmates one afternoon when she suddenly approached your table and asked that.

Your brows furrowed and shrugged your shoulders. “I don’t know. Why are you asking me?” you were confused why they started looking for Sunoo at you.

She smiled apologetically at you, “Oh.. I’m sorry. I just thought you know since you two were basically very close.” she then exits herself and started walking away.

You sighed heavily and your eyes darted over the vacant chair beside you. You’re actually very worried for Sunoo. Of course, you already sent him a text but he didn’t replied to you. While biting your lower lip, you made up your mind. You’ll go check on him after class just to see if he’s doing fine.

Feeling a bit hesitant you stood right in front of their house. He still didn’t replied or anything to you so that made you worried even more. After letting out a heavy sigh, you stretched out your hand and clicked the doorbell.

It rang and you patiently wait outside while your heart beat faster out of nervous. You were a bit startled when the gate to their house opened and a Sunoo wrapped inside a thick blanket greets you.

Suddenly your nervous was instantly replaced by worry as you saw him as this state. You advanced and quickly put the back of your hand over at his forehead.

“y/n?” he was surprised that you’re at his house.

“You have fever! Are you okay?” that was a dumb question because obviously he isn’t.

With cheeks tinted red, he held your hand and take it off from his forehead. “What are you doing here?” he asked you with furrowed brows.

You pouted kind of not used that he’s not smiling at you. n “I was worried because you’re absent and you’re not replying to my messages as well.” you told him.

His mouth fell open for a while, his hand still holding unto the hand you laid over his forehead.

“I don’t want you catching my cold.” he said trying to distance himself from you.

You smiled and Sunoo eyes settled over at your smiling face. This isn’t the first time he saw you smiling but this actually the first time he actually appreciated how beautiful you look while smiling.

“It’s okay! I don’t get sick easily.” you said trying hard to convince him.

He starred at you for a while and eventually gave in and let you go inside. He lets you go first as he closed the gate behind you. Your mouth fell open as you admire their house when you entered but your brows furrowed.

“Are you alone?” you asked wondering why the house sounded so empty.

Sunoo let himself dropped over the couch, n “My parents left for a business trip.” he said. You nodded your head and went close to him.

Sunoo gulped and sat properly as you walk closer. You leaned down and once again make your hand rest at his forehead. He’s hot. (I mean, have you seen him with a plain white polo----)

“Did you check your temperature already?” you asked him.

His eyes pierced right at yours and even when you’re feeling weak because of it, you tried not to look away from him. “Yeah, I have a fever.”

You nodded your head at him and even fixed the blanket so it will perfectly cover him. Your gentle touch makes Sunoo blush once again. Thankfully he have a fever so you’ll think his cheeks were red because he’s not feeling well.

“Have you eaten yet?”

“I can’t cook.” of course. You sighed and tied up your hair to keep them away from your face.

“You’ll c-cook for me?” he followed behind you as you made your way over at their kitchen.

“yeah.” and you gave him a smile before checking their fridge to make him some soup.

Sunoo sat down over at one of the stool and your brows furrowed while watching him do it. “What are you doing? Go lay down!” you said walking towards him to make him go down the stool.

“I want to accompany you.” he said refusing.

“You should rest.” you told him but he pouted at you.

“I am resting.” he said while starring right at your eyes. You gulped and both of you blushed when you realized you’ve been starring for a while.

You smiled a little starring at Sunoo’s sleeping state. He looked adorable while having his lips opened a little while asleep. His temperature went down already and he seems okay. You looked over at the blanket that was at the sofa. While looking after him, you fell asleep and he covered you with a blanket.

Now, you woke up and saw him asleep. Sunoo looked handsome always. Sometimes, you even think it’s so unfair how he can look this good even while sleeping?

You’re glad that he’s okay now. He really made you worried because he’s not responding to you. Feeling somewhat happy because finally, you had helped him for something. He’s always been the one who takes care of you but today, the role was switched and you’re glad you had returned the favor.

Just by thinking about it, Sunoo’s been really caring for you. Doing small things that you really appreciate. He just make sure you know he’s there no matter what and you want to make him feel the same. You want to be there for him too.

Your smile suddenly faltered and faded when you realized that you have feelings for him. Mixed emotions took over your whole system. You don’t know what exactly to do right now. You’re happy and excited for this new emotion you’re experiencing but you’re also afraid as to how he will react when he knew about this.

You know he’s nice and he’s probably used to people liking him but you’re afraid it’ll make your friendship awkward. You’re afraid that he’ll start treating you differently and find it awkward hanging out with you. You don’t know if you can take that.

As you enter the campus, some eyes were already plastered over at you. Even if you’re wondering why, you decided to just shrug it off and decided to just walk silently towards your classroom. As you get closer to your room, eyes were still eyeing you. Feeling very conscious about it, you had no choice but to lower down your head.

You let out a loud sigh when finally, you made it inside. But that’s what you thought. Your classmates eyes were starring at you as well. Feeling flustered once again, you went straight over your chair.

“y/n!” your classmate who sits in front of you turned around to face you. Unlike the other students, her stares were a lot more gentle. You felt somehow relieved. Feeling so lost because of their unusual stares.

“What’s going on? Is it just me or everyone’s looking at me?” you asked her with worried eyes. She smiled, looking a bit excited.

“How can they not stare at you? Have you seen what Sunoo posted?” she asked you giggling. Your head tilted over to the side as your brows furrowed in confusion.

“What post?”

“He posted a picture of you sleeping in his house! Why are you at his place yesterday?” she sounded excited while you’re dumbfounded. You can’t even make up what’s she’s saying because she was busy processing things inside her head.

Huh? Picture? Of me sleeping? What is it???? You quickly grabbed your phone to check what she’s talking about. You’re eyes grew big when you saw your account with an unusual number of notifications.

As you click one of it, it leads you towards a post with lots of comments and likes. It was Sunoo’s post and your classmate was right. It was a photo of you, sleeping.

You blushed because of it but you tried really hard not to put so much meaning into it. Maybe he’s just really thankful for you. Yeah, y/n. Maybe that’s just it.

You tried hard to divert your attention away from the post. It was hard since your classmates were still eyeing you even when the class were already starting. They were stealing glances at you. It was frustrating and you don’t know if you should be thankful that Sunoo’s not here yet or what.

“Yah, y/n, right?” You were taken aback when some group of girls approached you while you’re at your usual spot here in the garden. It was your vacant and to avoid the glances of your classmates, you decided to leave the room for a while to go and have some fresh air.

With furrowed brows you stood up, “Yeah.” you answered feeling a bit nervous.

With faces looking so stern and serious, you already have a guess why they’re here confronting. It’s probably because of Sunoo, right? Of course it’s gotta be because of him.

“What exactly do you have with Sunoo?” the girl in the middle advanced towards you. Feeling intimidated and scared, you stepped backwards but the other girls went behind you cornering you.

“N-Nothing, we’re friends.” you answered stuttering because of fear.

She looked pissed at what you answered, n “Liar! Friends? I always noticed the way you look at him! You like him! Why are you at his house yesterday? You got to be that desperate huh?” she once again advances towards you and even pushed you hardly.

You tried not to fell over the ground because that would be so pathetic. You gulped trying to swallow the lump building up inside your throat. You’re really scared right now and this is the first time this is ever happen in your life.

“I’m saying the truth. And I was at his house because--” you can’t even finish your sentence when a loud slap crashed over your cheeks.

You were dumbfounded and startled by the sudden attack from her. You never experienced things like this so you don’t exactly know what to feel right now. You can’t even move out of surprise! Your cheeks were hurting so bad and you bet it’s really red now.

“Sunoo and I were completely okay and you just entered in our life? How dare you! I can’t accept this!” she was going hysterical. You were confused why she’s even acting like this. You don’t even know her.

When she was about to slap you once again, you decided to close your eyes and just wait for it to land over your cheeks in the second time but it didn’t happen.

You opened your eyes a little trying to take a peak and you saw someone in front of you. As you roam your eyes around, you saw horror in the other girl’s eyes.

“What do you think are you doing?” it was Sunoo! You were a little confused because he doesn’t sound like Sunoo. He sounded so cold and emotionless.

“S-Sunoo!” the girl looked surprised that he’s in front of you now, protecting you from the girl who slapped you.

“Who told you that you can hurt, y/n?” he asked sternly and shoved away her hand. It was a bit strong so she backed up away from you. Her eyes started to water.

“Sunoo I like you!”

“And I told you, I don’t.” he was quick enough to response to her. It sent chills all over your spine when you heard how cruel he just rejected her. Will that happen to you as well?

“B-But--”

“I don’t want anything like this to happen again, do you hear me? Nobody’s allowed to hurt y/n or else you’ll deal with me.” he said seriously as his hand slowly took reach of yours. He softly held it before he send glares over them then turned around to face you.

His eyes slowly turned soft as he eye your red cheeks and slightly tear stained eyes. He was so worried for you and kind of feel bad that this things were happening because of him.

“Let’s get that fixed, baby.” you can’t even react at what you heard because he already started pulling you towards the clinic and away from those people.

“Thank you.” he smiled a little to the nurse as she handed him ice. You two were left afterwards and you gulped nervously.

You both were silent as you walk there, you didn’t dare to ask what you just heard and he didn’t dare to open up the topic about it too. You thought to yourself that it would be okay to maybe just ignore it. Maybe he was just really worried that it slipped out of his mouth.

“Let me see?” his hand feels so smooth while holding your face. His eyes were busy checking your red cheeks and his brows was hardly furrowed.

You chuckled a little and tried fixing his forehead. “Why you look so mad?” you asked like a joke to try and make him feel better.

“How can I not be mad? They hurt you.”

“She’s just misunderstanding our friendship.” you said chuckling. Sunoo pulled away as he stood straight. His eyes were now darted over you seriously.

He clenched his jaw then balled his fist. “Y/n.”

You suddenly felt chills ran down your spine as you heard him call your name. Having him call you by your name with serious face surely is different from when he calls you while smiling brightly. Suddenly, you’re nervous.

“H-huh?” you asked.

“Can I be the reason why you want to stay at this town?” he muttered and you saw how his cheeks got tinted red.

“What?” you thought you heard it wrong. Does he mean it like you think he mean it?

He sighed and starred right at your eyes, “Y/n, I have feelings for you.”

Feeling so overwhelmed and dumbfounded by what you just heard, your eyes started to watered as your heart aches. Is this really happening? You were just thinking of how you should tell him about your feelings.

“Are you serious?”

“Do I look like I’m joking?”

You stood up and threw yourself at him for a hug. He chuckled and felt his heart race as he burry his face over your neck inhaling your familiar scent.

“Now, you don’t have to leave anymore because I’ll be the reason for you to stay.” you pulled off the hug and leaned closer to Sunoo letting both of your noses to touch each other.

“I would love to stay.” you muttered before he leaned closer to kiss you passionately at your lips.

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nessinborderland · 4 years ago

Text

Between Apple Pies and Chocolate Cosmos (01)

Pairing: Aguni x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Character Study

Words: 6.4k

Summary: Aguni first laid eyes on you in the greenhouse. After that, he simply couldn't take you out of his mind.

Warnings: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Feelings, Eventual Romance, Denial of Feelings, Slow Burn, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

Notes: This was inspired by the wonderful @aghostsrantingcorner ask. For reference, there’s some things in this fic that were inspired by these posts by @hatterstan-shameblog. This will be 2-3 parts max. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do <3

Aguni first laid eyes on you in the greenhouse.

It was a rainy morning, and the Beach was as silent as you would expect after a night of deadly games and partying. He always took advantage of the silent mornings to have a walk around the place, breathe some fresh air, and – most importantly – attend to his garden.

He had started working on it soon after he and Takeru found the Beach, still in the early days when it was only them. He never saw a reason why he shouldn’t. Since he was stuck there for an indefinite amount of time – since he would probably die there – he might as well keep up with the only hobby that brought him some resemblance of peace.

So, he did it. Every single morning. It kept him grounded; reminded him of who he was.

His Eden – as he liked to think about it – was a medium-sized glasshouse near the kitchens, surrounded by land where he had replanted a variety of fruit trees and berry bushes that he had found around Tokyo. It needed some remodeling, but it was perfect as soon as he was done fixing the broken glass and built a system to expertly use the rainwater. He loved the place. Its variety of colors and smells, the silence, and – what made him the happiest – being able to watch the literal fruit of his labor grow.

It was his little piece of heaven in the hell he was trapped in.

Now, one thing about the greenhouse: no one was allowed inside the place beside him. Everybody knew it. It was not like anyone had any real interest in plants or vegetables but, still, people knew that that was his place. Even the old ladies responsible for the meals knew to not go inside; if they needed any ingredient, they asked him.

So imagine his surprise when he got closer to the glass walls of his greenhouse and heard soft singing coming from inside. It was barely audible, the tip-tap from the rain hitting the glass making it harder for him to understand any words. But he knew someone was in there.

His first thought was to barge in and kick out whoever was disrupting his garden. He could feel his anger grow as he stared at the blurred figure on the other side of the glass, messing around with his stuff. He took a deep breath before opening the door and stepping inside.

The air inside the greenhouse was warm, with light condensation already sliding down the glass walls. The intruder – a woman, he noticed – was with her back turned to him, humming a song that was more than familiar due to Takeru’s taste in music.

“... lay all your love on– ” you gasped as you turned to him, no doubt startled by his presence. The vase in your hands shattered as it hit the floor with a loud smash, and you let out another startled sound. You crouched to clean up the mess, a row of apologies already escaping from your lips. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, please don’t move while I–”

“You shouldn’t be here,” was all he said as he stood there, stoic and cold expression looking at you from above. Your face was vaguely familiar to him – like every other face at the Beach – but he knew nothing about you. He noticed when you froze and slowly looked up, locking eyes with him. He saw the exact moment you recognized him, eyes growing wide and mouth agape as you held broken pieces of clay in your hands.

“Aguni–”

“Clean up your mess and leave,” he mumbled as he walked past you to access the damage you had done to his greenhouse. He noticed how several of his previous empty vases were now occupied by small plants and flowers that he had meant to work on that morning. You had just done his work for him. And perfectly, he could tell. Or as perfect as he could expect from someone that wasn’t him. He felt his anger subside. “The chamomile is supposed to be planted next to the tomatoes,” he said as he started carefully removing the small flowers from the vases. “We have no need for tea here.”

“Hmm...I thought you were using those for medicinal purposes?” you hesitantly asked. He kept his back to you, focusing on the task at hand as he waited for you to leave. Leave, however, you did not. "I'm sure they could be useful if–"

"There are only two kinds of people here," he interrupted in a cold tone. "The living and healthy, and the dead. If you're wounded, you belong to the latter. The tomatoes, though, could use some–"

"But couldn't we start an infirmary here?" Your question made him stop what he was doing, and he raised a brow as he looked at you over his shoulder. No one interrupted him; ever. You clearly didn't notice his hard stare as you continued to talk, "We could use garlic and oregano oil for infections, and aloe vera for–"

"You shouldn't be here," he repeated, now in a tone slightly louder than he liked to use. You halted mid-sentence, the small smile on your lips changing into a frown. "I'm not repeating myself. This greenhouse is off-limits. Leave."

He gave you one last glance before focusing again on his task, listening as you gathered the broken vase. A whimper made him look back at you, watching as you stared at your bleeding finger, droplets of blood falling on the rich soil underneath you. He sighed before grabbing a roll of paper towels from a shelf above his head, turning to hand you one.

"Thank you," you said in a low tone as you accepted the help and involved the tissue around your finger, hissing from the pain.

Only then did he notice what that broken vase had been carrying. At your feet, in the middle of a small mountain of dirt, was a chocolate cosmos. It wasn't one of his flowers, he was sure of that. He had never even seen a live specimen before.

"Weren't those extinct?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Your eyes widen at his question before you looked at him with a soft smile on your lips. He felt the tips of his ears get warm; why in the hell were you smiling at him?

"Mhm, I think so... You can still find them in captivity, though," you said as you gently picked up the reddish-brown flower. You looked at him for a moment before nodding to the table behind him. "Could I get another vase, please? It's just that she's been staying in a box since I got her and I just wanted to– oh, thanks!"

You smiled at him again as he handed you another small vase without a word. Aguni averted his eyes, focusing on your hands as you arranged the pretty flower in its new home. He felt... uneasy, is the word. His usual relaxing morning had been ruined by some random woman with a nice smile.

He didn't like that one bit.

"Well... I'm gonna go now," you awkwardly started as you made your way to the door, before stopping and turning around as if you forgot something. "Oh, by the way, did you...did you do all this?" you asked, gesticulating around you. He nodded once and you smiled again. "It's beautiful. Good job."

With those words, you finally left him alone.

Aguni was sure he wasn't just blushing in his ears now. His whole face was warm. He never had anyone compliment him on his gardening skills before. Yeah, Takeru told him several times he was good at it, but no one had actually shown interest. It made him feel some kind of way.

He shook his head and got back to his work. He could still enjoy his quiet morning before a council meeting if he was fast enough.

»«»«»«

You were there the next morning.

The sun had barely risen when he approached the greenhouse, a warm cup of coffee in hand while he whistled a tune that had been stuck in his head since he woke up. He hadn't even noticed you until he went to open the door, your voice making him jump slightly where he stood.

"You like ABBA too?" you asked from behind him.

He looked over his shoulder to stare at you. You were sitting under a tree not far away, that same nice smile on your face. You were holding something in your hands – something that he noticed was hot – as steam was visible in the chill morning air.

He felt his ears get warm again; damnit, he hadn't even realized that the tune he was whistling was the same song he had caught you singing the day before. He took a deep breath and shook his head.

You both stood there, clearly waiting for the other to speak first. He was never a man of many words, though, so he just nodded once in your direction before getting inside his greenhouse and closing the door behind him.

A knock on the door not long after made him roll his eyes. He walked away from his work table with a sigh, cursing at his lack of peace and quiet; all the man wanted was to drink his morning coffee in solitude.

"What?" he asked as he opened the door to find you there, holding something wrapped in paper in his direction. He had noticed the steaming thing earlier. "What's that?"

"I wanted to thank you," you said, almost stumbling over your words as you signaled him to take it from you. "It's a pie."

"A pie?" he asked slowly, raising a brow in distrust.

"Yes, apple pie," you sent him a small smile as you tried to get him to accept the baked good. When he just stood there, arms crossed, your smile fell. He almost, almost, made a move to grab your offer then. "Hmm, Mrs. Yamamoto from the kitchen lets me use ingredients sometimes to bake stuff, and as long as I clean everything after–"

"I don't eat breakfast," he interrupted, arms still crossed as he looked you up and down with furrowed brows. He was trying to understand your intentions towards him. What was your move here?

"Oh, but you should, you know?" you said in a raised tone. "It's the most important meal of the day! A-and this one was made with your apples, so I thought you would–"

"What do you want from me?"

Even though Aguni was a man of few words, he never had any problem being direct. When you just looked at him with big, confused eyes, he was even more weirded out by your manners. You were either being genuine or were a really good actress. He didn't know what made him more uncomfortable.

"I just want to... to thank you for the vase?" you hesitantly answered, arms lowering.

His hand snapped towards your arm before he even realized, suddenly aware that he did want that pie. However, a pained gasp made him release you immediately upon touching you over your jacket.

"Are you hurt?" he asked, secretly hoping he hadn't actually hurt you.

"I- I'm fine," you answered with a shake of your head. "It was just a small injury from yesterday's game."

"Let me see," he ordered.

You stared wide-eyed at him, and it almost made him backtrack and send you away. Why should he care if you were hurt?

Aguni was about to do exactly that when you gingerly extended your arm in his direction. He focused on your arm as his fingers lightly grabbed your wrist, pulling your sleeve up to show a burn mark roughly the size of your palm. It didn't look too bad, but he could see that you hadn't put anything on it.

"Come," he said as he gestured at you to follow him inside the greenhouse.

He worked fast as he prepared something that would help you with your burn. He didn't know much about medicinal plants, but he knew enough.

He gestured at you to sit on the table as he carefully applied a mix of aloe vera and oats to your injury with light feather-like touches. It was all done in silence until he heard a noise from you, something resembling a barely huffed laugh. He glanced up to notice you looking straight at him, that same damned smile on your lips. He quickly focused back on the injury, hoping you wouldn't notice his red ears.

"I thought I was part of the dead now," you said, clearly referencing what he had said the day before. He grunted with a shrug, now at all interested in talking about his change of ideals. "You know...I never thought you were the type," you kept talking, and he kept addressing your injury. "To like plants, I mean. This place is amazing."

"What type am I, then?" he caught himself asking. Not that he particularly cared about your answer, but curiosity got the best of him. You laughed at his words and shrugged.

"Hmm, I don't know... the type that punches tigers?" He had to control the will to smile then, hiding his face from view. "I really wasn't expecting tall, big, and stoic Aguni to be so good with plants. I'm pleasantly surprised."

His movements halted for a second as he processed your words. He was sure he was red all over his face now, damn you. He continued what he was doing before he could overthink your words too much.

"Never judge a book by its cover."

He cringed as soon as those words left his mouth. What a corny thing to say. He decided then that your burn was sufficiently covered in aloe, and immediately retracted his hands, turning his back to you as he cleaned his fingers and tried to get his blush under control.

"Hmm, I guess you're right…" you said as he heard you stand up. "Well, thank you again, for this." He nodded and grunted in acknowledgment without turning to face you. "And the pie is here, just in case you want to try it." You hesitated, "...Hmm if you don't want it, you can always give it to Last Boss. He- he caught me in the kitchens once and I promised to bake him stuff if he helped me clean up after. He doesn't talk much and he's kind of scary, but he's nice." He turned to you then, and the expression on his face might've told you that you were overstaying your visit, so you quickly rushed for the door. "Mm okay, bye!" you said as you sent him an awkward wave and left.

He wondered if you thought he was scary but nice.

»«»«»«

A piece of chocolate cake was left by his greenhouse the day after.

The day after that, a croissant.

The gifts were always accompanied by small notes written in pretty handwriting. Some were simple recipes; others were small facts about medicinal plants he knew nothing about. He kept them all, safely hidden in a can on his worktable. A week went by where he expected a new pastry or sweet to welcome him. And, without fail, there it was. He never saw you around though, in the mornings or throughout the day, which he found odd. He didn't even know your name, but he found himself searching for you throughout the Beach, or in the games at night. But he never saw you. He would've thought you were dead if it weren't for the consistent gifts you left at his door.

Now, he wasn't lying when he said he wasn't a man for breakfast. He really wasn't. But after trying a piece of that apple pie, he saw himself devouring almost the whole thing. The same with the cake and the croissant. They were probably the best baked goods that he had ever tried. He was even more excited to start his mornings.

This morning, however, he arrived at the greenhouse to find nothing by the door. No box, no note, no wrapping. Nothing. He furrowed his brows, feeling disappointed, but quickly shrugged the feeling off as he got inside. Your pleasantries had to stop someday.

It bothered him, though. And he hated the fact that it bothered him. He hated the fact that he cared. He spent the day thinking about it. Thinking about you. Where could you possibly be? What happened? He didn’t even know your name. He didn’t know what bedroom you lived in, and it was driving him mad.

He had zoned out throughout the morning meeting, lashed out at several of the militants, and was now fully ignoring Takeru as his best friend went on and on about something he didn’t care enough to even pretend to be listening.

“Mori, hey!” His friend snapped his fingers in front of his face, forcing Aguni out of his thoughts. He stared at Takeru with a frown.

“What?” he asked, taking a sip from the glass of water in front of him.

“The first time all week that we’re having lunch together, and you’re quieter than usual,” his friend said, nodding at the plate of barely touched food in front of him. “You’re not even eating. What’s going on?”

“I’m fine,” he shrugged, stabbing a piece of roasted rabbit with his fork and taking a bite. He chewed as he thought of a good excuse. Takeru could be annoyingly perceptive when it came to other people’s emotions, especially his. “Just have a lot on my mind, that’s all,” he finally said.

His friend looked at him for a moment before setting his elbows on the table, supporting his chin on his palms. Oh no, he knew what that meant. He was about to be questioned to death.

"Are you in love?" he asked, a slight smirk on his lips.

Aguni choked on his own spit at the man's question, violently coughing as he vehemently shook his head.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" he asked after easing his cough, throat burning, and eyes teary from the effort.

"Well let's see," Takeru started, hand raised as he prepared himself to make a list. Aguni instantly regretted his question. "You've been late to meetings almost every morning for the past week, you barely pay attention to anything I tell you and I'm pretty sure I heard you hum 'Lay All Your Love on Me' by ABBA the other day. I've never heard you do anything close to singing," Takeru said as he wiggled three raised fingers before raising a fourth. "And a little bird told me that they heard you talking with someone inside your garden house." The smirk on his lips turned into a grin as Aguni averted his eyes. "So, tell me; who is she? Or is it a he? C'mon, you know you can tell–"

"I don't know what you're talking about," was all he said in what he hoped was a nonchalant tone.

Takeru wasn't easy to fool, though.

"You know what, I know you're full of shit, but I will allow it," he said with a fork pointed in his direction. "For now, at least. Now it's dessert time!" Takeru licked his lips as he pulled a tray to the center of the table. "I've been wanting you to try this for days, it's delicious!" He opened the tray to uncover two perfectly sized individual pies. Not just any pies, either. Aguni knew exactly who made them.

"Where did you get this?" he blurted out, staring at the perfectly cooked pastries. Takeru looked at him with a confused look.

"Huh, the kitchen? Where else?"

"Yeah, but who made them?" Aguni pressed further, wanting an answer that would show him that you were actually alive. "Were they made today?"

"Uh, I would hope so, yeah. And I don't know who made them, old Yamamoto just said it was one of her helpers," Takeru retorted with a shrug. "They're amazing, though, you should try it."

Aguni almost felt himself sag in relief. If these were made today, that meant that you were alive. It also meant that you definitely had stopped leaving gifts at his door. He tried not to focus on how he felt a little hurt by it. It was not like you owed him anything, anyway.

He still couldn't stop thinking about you as he finished his lunch with Takeru. He hated to admit it, but he felt bad for how he had treated you when you first met. He felt like he owed you at least an apology, and – not like he would ever admit it to himself – he wanted to see you again.

He always went for a short walk after lunch before having to proceed with his duties for the day. He wasn't exactly surprised to find himself by the kitchens, peeping inside the large double doors to take a look – part of him hoping to see you there.

What he saw instead were the so-called Food Ladies, a group of old women that had taken upon themselves the important role of cooking for everyone at the Beach. They were now chilling and having their own meals after the lunch hour rush. He spotted Mrs. Yamamoto, the oldest of the bunch – that also happened to be the boss – leaning by the doors that led outside, smoking her usual cigarette. She spotted him too, with small dark eyes that made him want to run away. It was strangely similar to the way his grandmother used to look at him when he misbehaved as a child.

“Oi, boy, c’mere,” she called him before he could walk away. The laughs and conversations of the other women ceased immediately as he entered the room. They eyed him for some time, one of the old ladies elbowing another before whispering something he couldn’t hear. His brows furrowed; he hated all that attention.

“Mrs. Yama–”

“You have to learn how to control your militants, Aguni,” she said as soon as he got close enough. “Two of your boys were disturbing one of my girls this morning. God knows what they would’ve done to the poor thing if I hadn’t shooed them away.” He had to control his facial expression; was she talking about you? “That girl gets up before dawn to cook sweets for so many people in this godforsaken place, and that’s how they repay her?” The old woman shook her head, before adding, “The rude boy with the piercings on his face and the odd one with the katana. See to it that they don’t get close to her again, do ya hear me?”

He nodded once before turning to leave, anger already simmering inside him. He had the urge to use his fists on a very specific someone.

He found whom he was looking for on the roof, as he expected. Last Boss was the first to notice him, eyes going wide as Aguni power walked to the man next to him.

“...and Chishiya– oh fuck! What the hell?!” Niragi screamed as Aguni pushed him toward the edge of the roof before forcing him to lean over it.

He held the man by his collar, almost making him lose his balance and fall to his death. Part of him really wanted to let go. He knew what Niragi was capable of.

“What were you doing in the kitchen this morning?” he asked in a cold, emotionless tone. The younger man looked down before visibly gulping and staring at him with a furrowed brow.

“T- The kitchen?...” he asked back. Aguni took a deep breath before loosening the grip on his shirt, making Niragi yelp and grab his arm. “Look look, it was his idea to go there, I didn’t do anything!”

Aguni looked back at Last Boss, and the man raised his hands while shaking his head.

“He- he just followed me there, I didn’t ask him to come with me,” the tattooed man said, stumbling on his words. “If you’re talking about the old lady, she kicked us out, but we didn’t do anything, I swear.”

“The girl?” he asked through gritted teeth. He was starting to lose his patience. The younger men shared a look between them before Last Boss started talking.

“Y/N?” he asked for clarification. So that was your name. “We didn’t touch her. Niragi just took some pies and we left.”

“Is that so?” Aguni asked Niragi, the man still in his grasp. He knew what he was capable of, and he wouldn’t put it past Last Boss to lie for his friend. “Cause that’s not what I heard…” his fingers loosened once again around the man’s collar, making him tighten his grip on Aguni’s arm.

“Fine, fine, I- I might’ve teased her a little,” the man confessed. “But I didn’t mean to make her cry, and we left right after. I didn’t do anything, I swear!”

Aguni considered his words for a moment, before pulling Niragi off the edge and pushing him to the ground. The man cursed something under his breath that Aguni preferred to ignore as he now focused on Last Boss.

“Do you know her last name?” he asked. The man shook his head. Aguni sighed; he would have to check Mira’s records if he wanted to find her room. “You both better stay away from the kitchens and from that girl,” he said, now keeping his stone-cold gaze on Niragi. “Is that clear?”

Both men nodded.

Without another word, Aguni left the roof.

»«»«»«

It was surprisingly hard for him to find your room.

Mira had immediately denied any access to her records, claiming invasion of privacy. Which it was; he would probably do the same thing if he was in her place. But he pressed on, and she eventually gave in, simply saying that you lived in the south wing of the Hotel, somewhere on the second level. He accepted the information and forced himself to ask around for you, as inconspicuously as he could. Surprisingly, practically no one recognized the description he gave of you, and no one knew your name. He was almost giving up when finally...

“Oh, Y/N?” a couple of young women said. “Yeah, she lives next door to us, room 237.”

He finally had your room number.

Aguni spent five minutes gathering the necessary courage to knock on your door, hesitating and almost leaving every time he lifted his knuckles against the door. He made a frustrated sound, annoyed with himself.

“You’re an idiot,” he mumbled under his breath.

“Hello?” someone greeted behind him. Aguni froze before looking over his shoulder. There you were. Dressed in shorts and a light jacket, hair in a braid over your shoulder, and a hesitant smile on your face, you looked pretty in his eyes. It really made him wonder if Takeru was right; he did have a crush on someone. “Hmm, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, uh- hey.” He cleared his throat as he realized he had been staring. He could feel his face getting warm. “Hm, how’re doing?” he asked, before grimacing. Ah yes, Morizono, very nice. You raised a brow as you looked at him for a moment.

“I’m... fine,” you answered with a hesitant smile. “Were you waiting for me?”

“Yes, I- I wanted to apologize,” he cringed at his stuttering. But there it was. Direct and clear. The fastest he could get himself out of this awkward conversation, the better. “I heard about what happened this morning with two of my militants, and I just want you to know that they won’t bother you again.”

“Oh, that was just a misunderstanding!" you say as you shake your head. "I was just talking with Mrs. Yamamoto about that. Nothing happened."

"That was not what I heard."

"No, no, I'm fine, they didn't do anything to me," you reassured him. "Niragi just… said some mean things, but Last Boss stopped him. Mrs. Yamamoto thought they were hurting me and I'm really sorry." You shrugged and gave him an awkward smile. "I just cry sometimes. I even went to talk with Last Boss about it, but I think Mrs. Yamamoto really scared him, 'cause he keeps avoiding me." You said with an awkward chuckle. "But I'm okay, really."

Aguni grunted with a nod, convinced that you were telling him the truth. Still, he wanted those two, Niragi in particular, as far from you as he could.

"If they mess with you again, let me know, all right?" You nodded at his request, and he almost had the urge to smile back at you. "Okay then," he said with a nod before making a move to leave.

"Hmm, did you enjoy today's pastry?" he heard you ask in a hesitant tone. He turned around, confused. There was no pastry waiting for him today. He said so to you, and your brows furrowed. "Uh, no, I'm pretty sure I left you something. Strawberry pie with a chocolate crust?"

"There was nothing when I got there," he said. There were butterflies in his stomach, though. You hadn't stopped baking stuff for him, after all.

"That's odd…" you said as you bit your lip, wondering what could've happened. "Well," you shrugged, "I'll make sure you get it tomorrow morning, then."

He nodded without a word and watched as you smiled at him before moving to open your door.

"How's your arm?" he blurted out before he could stop himself. You froze by the door for a moment before showing him your arm, skin looking much better than it was just a week prior.

"That aloe mix you gave me helped a lot. Thanks, again," you said with another one of those smiles that made him want to smile back.

"You know…" he hesitated for a moment before taking a deep breath and saying what he meant to say, eyes on your feet, "If you ever want to, you can show up by the greenhouse, sometimes. There are these new seeds I got that might interest you. I don't know, but the offer stands."

He shrugged, like what he just said meant nothing. He finally focused on your face, and his stomach did somersaults as he found you grinning at him.

"I would like that very much."

»«»«»«

You were there the next morning.

And the next. And the next. And the other one after that. Always with a smile on your face, always carrying a new sweet that you would both share.

The first days were as awkward as you could imagine. He almost feared looking you in the eyes, feeling like a teenager again with all the blushing and weird sensations in the pit of his stomach. All he needed was a smile from you to look as red as one of his tomatoes.

At first, you would eat in silence, until you eventually broke it by mentioning something about plants, or what flowers you were expecting to bring the next time you went scavenging. Then it would be just you doing most of the talk as he stuffed his mouth with whatever deliciousness you had brought him that day, nodding, and grunting on occasion. He realized he liked hearing you speak. Hearing your voice.

Then he would start working on whatever he had planned the morning before, and that's when you would watch him as he went around his garden showing you things. You would give him ideas from time to time, always following him as you attentively listened to his words. He realized he liked the attention. Your attention.

It didn't take long until you were more comfortable around each other. Then you would both talk freely, almost always about plants. He would be lying if he said he wasn't curious to know more about you, but he didn't have the courage to ask.

"What did you do... before?" you asked one day, about a week into your morning rendezvous. You were sharing a quiche today, and he took his time chewing before answering.

"Was part of the SDF," he said. You nodded like it made sense that a man like him had a job like that. "Nothing too interesting, though,” he said with a shrug. “You?"

"Worked at my family's bakery," you said, a small smile on your face as you seemed to think back to those times. "My grandma taught me everything I know. She made the best quiche in Tokyo, you know? Mine has nothing on hers."

He couldn't control his chuckle then, nor he meant to say the words that got out of his mouth next.

"Takeru would love to hear that."

"Who?" you asked, brow raised as you chewed a piece of the salty pastry. There were flakes of crust on the corner of your mouth, and he had to control the urge to wipe them away with his thumb. He shook his head instead.

"Just a friend from… from back home," he said. "The man can't cook to save his life but bakes one hell of a quiche. Yours is better, though."

You smiled at the compliment and proceeded to eat in silence. He didn't want to waste the chance to get to know you more, though.

"What do you do all day?" he asked. You raised a brow, and he specified what he meant, "I mean, I barely see you around and no one seems to know you, so…"

"Oh, I just stay in my room all day," you said as you shrugged and let out an awkward chuckle. "I'm not really a people person and I spend most of my nights awake, so I mostly just sleep."

"What do you do when you're awake, then?"

"I go to the games, I bake and, well, now I spend some time here with you." He could swear his heart beat a little faster at your words. He felt strangely honored that you decided to spend time with him.

"Yeah, I'm not much of a people person myself," he said. "Plants are much better, aren't they?" He tried to send you a small smile but immediately regretted it as it felt more like a grimace. You smiled back at him, though, so it probably wasn't as bad as he thought it was.

"Hmm, you're right, but I don't mind some people."

He didn't know what to make of your statement.

»«»«»«

A month passed when you met every morning.

Your joined morning routine had taken a comfortable rhythm for both of you, where you ate, talked, and worked without that awkward vibe of the first few days. With you joining him in the work, his crops flourished. It was the best part of his day, without a doubt.

He realized several things during that time.

The first was that you liked to sing while you worked. Didn't matter if you were planting potatoes, watering the flowers, or preparing herbal remedies – that you had eventually convinced him to be useful – you were always humming a tune under your breath, or singing the words aloud.

The second thing he realized was that he liked it.

He liked to hear you sing so much that the songs would stay in his head for the rest of the day, and he would wake up with your voice still echoing in his head. He had even caught himself whistling at times. Once during a council meeting, where he had zoned out again and was completely oblivious to the fact that he had been humming 'I Want to Break Free’ by Queen until Takeru snapped his attention and everyone was looking at him like he had grown two heads. All except his best friend, that had a knowing smirk on his lips.

The third thing he realized – and, to his shock, didn't surprise him – was that he had totally developed a crush on you.

"So, am I ever going to meet them or what?" Takeru asked over his glass of golden whiskey, taking a sip when Aguni took too long to answer. "You can't keep them a secret from me forever."

"I don't know what you're talking about," was all Aguni said as he took a gulp of his own drink, avoiding his friend's eyes and looking at the moon up high in the sky. His friend really had the best view for late-night drinking, especially after a stressful game.

"Fine, don't tell me," Takeru shrugged like he didn't care, but Aguni could tell he one hundred percent did. What was he supposed to tell him? There was no relationship for him to talk about.

"Okay, listen…" his friend's eyes shined as he focused all his attention on him, making Aguni want to hide from his scrutiny. He took a deep breath before saying, "There's nothing to talk about. There's no relationship."

"Ahh, but you're in love, aren't you?" Takeru let out an excited laugh, and Aguni could feel the corners of his mouth pulling up. "In all the years we've been friends I saw you like what? Three people? And you never behaved like this." He drank whatever was left of the drink in his glass before filling it up again. "This one sure looks promising." There was a pause where they just drank in silence before he asked again "So, what's her name? It’s a she, isn't it?"

"Y/N," Aguni mumbled, loud enough for him to hear. Takeru's eyes widen comically at the name.

"The pie girl?!" he asked in a raised tone. "You're head over heels for the pie girl?" He laughed then, and Aguni furrowed his brows in annoyance.

"You know her?"

"Yeah, I mean, old Yamamoto wouldn't tell me who the miracle baker was, so I went to see for myself. She's cute," he let out a mean chuckle, "I knew you were getting thicker around the waist. She's feeding you well, I see."

"Yeah." Aguni gave him a full-on smirk as he said the next words, "She makes the best quiche I've ever eaten."

The shocked and offended gasp that left Takeru's mouth almost made him laugh.

"You take that back!" the man punched his arm once and drank the remaining of his whiskey in one single gulp. "You just ruined my night. Get out and think about what you just said. I'll be expecting an apology by morning."

Aguni laughed then, the only kind of laugh that he could only make when he was around his best friend.

"Yours is good," he shrugged, still laughing. "But hers is better."

»«»«»«

->Next Chapter

#alice in borderland #alice in borderland fanfic #ima wa no kuni no alice #aguni morizono #aguni x reader #aguni fanfiction #aguni imagine #aib fanfic

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