#goku x wonder woman

[madman479r]

Son Goku X Wonder Woman Gibslythe Ship Table (Updated version)

Context:

Goku at the end of GT.

Wonder Woman from the Justice League / Unlimited animated series.

Goku was suddenly thrown into the DC universe after a training accident in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber. He realises he's on Earth, just not his Earth and sees it's in trouble from the invading aliens in "Secret Origins" episode.

Big/Little Spoon: Goku isn't a still sleeper, moving all over the bed in an undignified manner but when Diana wishes to cuddle, Goku is always the big spoon, despite being shorter than her.

Lends/Borrows Clothes: Goku is willing to lend Diana some spare Gi for training, doesn't help that he kinda finds it attractive on Diana.

Doesn't/Does Use Pet Names: Goku nor Diana are ones to use pet names, though Diana will say "My love" in private. Goku doesn't really use Pet names because he never really saw the reason for it.

Introverted/Extroverted: Goku is the definition of an extrovert, always happy to see the world and the adventures he may come across. He's spontaneous, loves fun and has the ability to live in the moment. Diana lived most her life on a secluded island so she's eager to see the rest of the world, and she's happy to have Goku be the one to join her.

Awkward AF/Cool as a Cucumber: Both Goku and Diana are experienced warriors, being cool and collected under stressful and dangerous situations, however, in worst case scenarios, both can allow emotions to overcome them and control their actions.

Confesses First/Waits For Confession: Diana doesn't beat around the bush and told Goku her feelings as soon as she was sure what she felt was love. Goku hadn't felt this way about a woman since Chi-Chi and had basically unintentionally told Diana he loved her.

"You know, I kinda feel weird when I'm with you."

"Oh? How so do you mean?"

"It's just that the last time I felt this way with someone was with Chi-Chi."

"Chi-Chi... the woman who was your wife?"

"Yeah. I really loved her, she made my heart beat fast, my skin feel tingly and I was always happy seeing her. So I'm kinda confused on why I'm feeling this way with you."

"Oh?... Oh!"

Screams About/Squashes Bugs: Goku doesn't kill bugs, preferring to just remove them. Diana is the same, especially after seeing Goku's kind heart to all living life.

Drives/Can't Drive: Goku did pass his driving test and can drive a car, but after years of not driving he's gotten rusty. Though he's been forbidden from flying the team's jet used in the Justice League. Diana is a better pilot than driver.

Can't Cook/Makes Dinner: Goku can never hold a candle to Chi-Chi's culinary skills, but he knows how to cook basic stuff like raw meat, and his days as a farmer let him learn what the best fruits and vegetables look and taste like. Diana is similar but was taught by the cooks of Themyscira so she knows more than Goku does at least.

Horny AF/Asexual: Both are natural warriors, whose blood boils in the heat of battle. Saiyan men love strong women, be it in physical strength or will, and Diana certainly has both those. Sparring with Diana can get Goku excited in more ways than one and half the time after a good session Goku is certainly in the mood. Diana also finds herself drawn to Goku, a strong, kind man who doesn't look down on women but instead is amazed and excited by them. Goku is the exact opposite to how men are depicted by her mother and Diana is all to pleased by that.

Top/Bottom: Being from a female dominant island and raised to be a powerful and independent woman, Diana likes being on top but is willing to let Goku take the reins. Goku is a switch, happy and fine with being either top or bottom, as long as he and his partner are happy and feeling good.

Has More/Has No Relationship Experience: Goku was married to Chi-Chi, so he certainly has more experience than Diana.

How it happened:

I like to imagine the romance happened gradually, after all this is a action based show. For Goku, he didn't imagine he'd fall in love with someone other than Chi-Chi, he also didn't realise that he was actually feeling romantic emotions for Diana.

For Diana, she's fascinated by Goku, who he is, his history and wanted to get to know more of the kind yet powerful stranger. Over time, her fascination changes to feelings of love and she wanted to get closer to the Saiyan.

Handling Conflict:

Goku doesn't have a mean bone in his body, nor does he really hold grudges, look at half his friends in the Z fighters, he's also very laid back kind of guy, never really worrying about issues. He never really has any issues with Diana or anything she does.

Diana is closer to the middle when it comes to forgiveness, depending on the scenario. If its something trivial, Diana can brush it off and easily forgive but hates it when Goku risks his life or gets overly carried away in a fight with enemies.

Relationship Attitude:

Diana is the more dedicated of the two (Not to say Goku doesn't care), since she's never been in a relationship before so its exciting for her and she wants to make the most of it. She's also a balance of doing PDA and being reserved, happy to show Goku affection but doesn't feel the need to broadcast it for everyone to see.

Goku certainly wants to put the effort in with Diana, but just like with Chi-Chi, he doesn't feel the need to go on extravagant dates, more of 'go with the flow' kind of guy and he's more comfortable with displaying affection for Diana.

Showing affection:

Goku is a master fighter, a master tactician and master adaptor, but he's no master with words, but he's certainly affectionate with his actions, hugging and kissing Diana, also sparring. With both Goku and Diana being fighters, they display their emotions through action and combat, hell a big reason Goku loves Diana is because she's a warrior as well.

Diana would definitely be the one to initiate acts of affection more and she's a good balance of verbal and non-verbal affection.

Dealing With Jealousy:

Goku doesn't feel jealous, even when he sees other men leer at or try to flirt with Diana, he knows Diana loves him.

Diana on the other hand can't help but get annoyed by how other women, both civilian and heroine, ogle or try their luck with him, but finds it amusing how dumbfounded those women become by Goku's naivety. She also likes it when Goku shows her attention if and when he notices her jealousy.

Attachment:

Goku trusts Diana and her capabilities as a warrior so he isn't overprotective, especially because he knows Diana is prideful and won't interfere unless it's serious or potentially fatal. He's also independent, having been alone quite a few times without issue.

Diana was a part of a warrior society that believed in protecting their own in a fight. She'll respect his desire to fight his opponents on his own but hates when it's against enemies that shouldn't be dealt with alone.

[tredawakandan]

Dope recent artwork I came across

[actuallysaiyan]

HI BACON!! 🥓💙 glad to see your requests are back open so will you please do headcanons for Vegeta, Goku Black and Piccolo walking in on their horny! s/o masturbating? anyways hope you are doing well and stay hydrated 😊

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, masturbation, slight dub con, Piccolo has a diccolo, vaginal fingering, oral sex(fem and male receiving) word count: 1.1k pairings: Vegeta x Fem!Reader, Goku Black x Fem!Reader and Piccolo x Fem!Reader

Vegeta comes in from a long training session, expecting to find you in the kitchen. He grows frustrated when he doesn’t find you there and begins calling out your name.

The minute he opens the door to your shared bedroom and sees you on the bed, hands between your thighs and moaning out his name, Vegeta is very stunned and red in the face.

You spot him and you buck against your hand even more, your excitement growing now that your husband is here. Vegeta is stammering and stuttering, desperately trying to come up with something to say.

“Like what you see, my prince?” you pull your fingers from your cunt, beckoning him closer. Vegeta sputters something about this being so inappropriate but you see the growing bulge in his spandex.

Slowly, Vegeta begins approaching you. The scent of your essence is getting the better of him. He’s unable to pull away from the situation that has been presented to him. You’re basically being offered up on a silver platter.

He crawls onto the bed, pinning your wrists above your head. You see that lustful animalistic look in his eyes as he leans in to kiss you hungrily. The moment your tongues touch, Vegeta knows he has to take care of you.

“Poor little human wife,” he growls as he begins leaving kisses down your neck and onto your collarbone. “Couldn’t wait for her husband to come home, huh?”

You shake your head, begging for him to stimulate you. It does not matter what he does, you just know you’re so desperate for it right now. He laughs at you, mocking you a little.

“Poor little woman needs her prince…” his voice is teasing you now, but you know he’s going to make you feel much better. He’ll take good care of you.

With one smooth movement, Vegeta is balls deep inside of you. His lips are firmly pressed against yours as he begins his fast and deep pace. If you ever decide to pull this trick on him again, he might punish you even worse.

He’s somehow become attached to you. You keep him company and he finds some sort of amusement and entertainment with you. It took very little time for him to become intimate with you.

One day as he comes home, he doesn’t find you waiting for him in the doorway. This bothers him as he begins to wonder if you’ve just decided to leave him be. This is exactly what he was worried about.

But then he finds you on the bed, desperately trying to cum from just your fingers. He tuts at you, finding you so damn pitiful and pathetic. Humans really are this naive and foolish.

Yet the smell of you makes his cock so hard. He knows that the Saiyan part of him makes him weak to these sorts of mating practices. He wants to bury his face between your thighs and pull pleasure from you until you cry.

“Aren’t you just the foolish little human?” He asks, making you whine for him. You’re grinding against your hand so desperately, it makes him mock you in a very mean tone of voice.

He then snatches your hand from between your thighs and brings it to his lips. You watch through lust-filled eyes as he sucks on them and makes a big mess of your fingers. Then he shoves them back to your pussy.

“Show me how badly a needy little human like you needs to cum. I’m not entirely convinced that you deserve my cock just yet. I need to be convinced, little human.” He smirks as he watches you get into it so much more.

You’re inspired to work your hand against your clit even harder and faster, pitiful and pathetic moans falling from your lips as you try to show Goku Black just how needy you are for him. It’s a desperate attempt.

The more you grind against your own hand, the more you begin dripping all over the sheets and your own fingers. Goku Black watches you, making sure you aren’t faking your emotions and feelings for him at this moment.

Once he’s pleased successfully, he will strip off his clothes and give you exactly what you need. You’ll be so full, you can feel his cock in your lower tummy. Your eyes will roll back as he fucks you until you’re desperately crying for him to stop.

Piccolo doesn’t exactly understand romantic and sexual relationships at first, but soon he gets the gist of it when you give him a blowjob. He becomes quite addicted to it, to the point where he allows you to do it while he meditates.

Even without that, Piccolo begins craving other things. You’ve made this previously thought to be asexual Namekian addicted to sex. That’s why when he finds you in your bedroom, the vibrator on your clit, he’s already salivating.

“Hmph, couldn’t wait for me, could you?” His deep voice pulls you from your pleasure, and you’re blushing deeply. You try to make up an excuse, but he’s already pulling off his clothes and approaching you.

“You want to be filthy and touch yourself instead of coming to me for pleasure? Fine, open up!” He commands you as he begins to stroke his cock. Then as you open your mouth, he stuffs his cock in and watches as you struggle to adjust to it.

You feel one of his hands coming down to place the vibrator back onto your clit. You really never would have thought that Piccolo would be the type to be into this sort of thing, but you’ve shown him a world of pleasure he’s not used to.

He lets out the sexiest moans and groans as you relax your throat and allow him to use you as his personal little fleshlight. It’s so exciting to you to allow him to use you like this. It’s a whole new side to him.

He works the vibrator on your clit in such a teasing way, making you moan around his cock. All of this is turning out to be just so perfect. Catching you touching yourself was the perfect excuse for him to start something sexual like this.

“You’re a filthy little human,” he teases between moans and groans. “Such a needy little thing,” his words make you dribble even more nectar from your neglected hole. He loves watching you like this.

It’s not long before his balls are drawing up and he feels his orgasm building even faster than intended. So he pulls out and gets on his knees between your thighs. With one look up at you, he leans in to lick a stripe from your hole to your clit.

Piccolo stays between your thighs, lapping up your juices and using his fingers to curl up against that sweet spot that leaves you breathless and seeing stars. He’ll do it until you’re just begging him to stop.

[dreadsuitsamus]

Lost Part Six | Vegeta x Reader |

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five

author's note: we're getting very close to the end, y'all! thank you so much for your support and patience 🩷

pairing: vegeta x fem!reader

warnings: canon typical violence, does not follow canon timeline of events

"Don't expect to see this ship again soon, if ever." You murmur while carefully holding baby Trunks as Bulma unhooks various computers from the ship.

She falters in her movements for a brief moment. "What are you planning on doing?"

"Finding my son."

"That much I figured." Bulma rolls her eyes and glances over her shoulder. "You're not coming back?"

"I will for the Androids; I've already promised as much to Goku."

"You don't…" The tired mother resumes her work, doing her best to stay on task before Vegeta shows up. "I wasn't asking you to leave."

"I know that. But it's best for everyone involved if I do, don't you think?"

"No, I don't."

"Why's that? Without me, you have your perfect little family." You look down at little Trunks, who is nearly fast asleep as he rests his little head on your chest. No doubt he finds your arms to be like a warm blanket, all thanks to your Saiyan trait of running like a furnace in August, and you can't help but think to yourself just how cute he is. "Vegeta can't find V without my help, so he won't be able to kill him. I've trained and powered up in ways I never imagined, much less my son's wildest dreams. I can conquer him myself, I know it."

"And what about Goku and his family, and all they've done for you?"

"I will never be able to repay what they've done for me. And they do deserve better, but time is of the essence and all I can promise is to ensure that Gohan will not be doomed to that future your son warned you of. In four years, I will return and make sure of it."

Bulma's quiet for a moment, and it isn't until the ship is about ready that she speaks again. "Thank you. And… I'm sorry for all you've lost."

"The only thing I have still is my hope that my son isn't on that list. I love my husband and I want nothing more than to have him and be the family we dreamed of being so long ago. But my time with Vegeta… It's passed." Tears sting in your eyes, and you turn away from the woman that's being handed the fruit of your dreams on a silver platter, though you still hold her son carefully. "He's not been very good to you, I know. But Vegeta can and will be a good father and husband for your family. He was for mine, in our short time as one."

"You don't have to do this." Bulma says softly.

"I do. Perhaps the karma of my race's sins is falling on me and my family." You sigh to yourself and hand away the sleepy baby to his mother's loving arms, noting to yourself that your husband has quite the habit of making the most adorable babies. "Saiyans… We are proud, and perhaps we shouldn't be. The things Vegeta and I did…" You shake your head. "We are truly hellbound, Bulma. And maybe with you… Vegeta can avoid that fate. You're a good woman, and the people here are good. Vegeta needs that, and my son needs me."

"Just bring him here." Bulma's eyes are sad, much to your surprise. She's truly a wonderful woman. "That way everyone can win."

"To do that would be to doom him to death and seal Vegeta's fate in hell. V's my baby, and he's waiting for me at our old training grounds, I'm sure. I need to go now; Vegeta won't be down much longer."

"... Alright." Bulma sighs and after a quick summary of how to fly the ship, she steps aside and slips a pair of headphones over Trunks' gentle little ears to protect them from the loud noises of the ship. "So… Why do you think he's at the old training grounds?"

"It's where he always wanted to be. He's a true, full-blooded Saiyan, after all. We couldn't train on the planet we made our new life on, and he was always so happy when we made the journey to one of the planets King Vegeta decided to keep for the royal family's benefit. That same planet was my husband's favorite as well."

If only my boys could meet… They'd be so close.

You adjust your white gloves, pulling them tightly onto your hands and flexing your fingers a bit. Your son will never see the power that resides beneath these palms coming, and the thought does put a bit of a smirk on your face. He may think he's powerful, but his mother surely isn't one to fool with. Turning to Bulma, you give a quick two-fingered salute before closing the hatch to the ship and settling into the captain's chair for takeoff.

With an oddly calm and quiet mind, you start up the ship and aim for the stars, the image of Vegeta's smile dancing behind your lids as you relax back into your chair. He used to smile all the time, and since finding him again, you're not sure if you've seen him smile once. Will he ever smile again? you wonder as you widen the gap between your hearts.

I hope you're ready, V. Mama's coming home with a helluva chip on her shoulder.

Panic and fear flood Vegeta's mind as his eyes open up. His skull burns with a particular throb at his temple, and his back isn't faring much better as it aches with a scorching pain that climbs his spine during the dizzy scramble to his feet. What in the hell did you do?! Why?

"That woman…" He seethes and falls to his knees as his head swims. You got him good, that's for sure. He's certainly concussed and he curses lowly as he buries his face in his hands to will the nausea away.

He damn sure meant it when he said he wasn't going to let go, and despite your best effort to sway him, you will. Not. Win.

A special scent catches his nose, and it's only now that he realizes you've left your replenished lady's favor in his palm. A smirk raises his lips as your natural smell eases away his nausea and pain, which you surely must not have intended. His victory is short-lived, however, and a snarl forms as he grits his teeth with a low growl. How dare you do this to him? To yourself??

Careful not to burn your favor, Vegeta bursts through the roof of the cabin in his powerful Super Saiyan form and rushes back to Capsule Corps with a scream so raw it destroys his throat and so loud it could likely break the barrier of space and time. You've gone and fucking done it now, and the next time he sees you (and he will see you again) he may not even hesitate to get his lick back and deliver a concussion of your own.

"I will find you, woman, and you better be fucking ready to dodge!"

His landing is rough, and his stomach turns as he touches down. If Bulma let you go, so help him he'll burst into a frenzy and her poor lab won't make it out alright—

Bulma.

There's no doubt in his mind— she's the one that revealed the Androids to you. You'd been living with Kakarot and his family for months and miraculously had no knowledge at all, and after the heiress of the Brief family fortune felt slighted she had to have told you everything! What a petty, vindictive, sore loser of a—

You did threaten to kill her.

His taste in women could not possibly be worse.

Pushing through his concussed fog, Vegeta stumbles into the house loudly and isn't exactly surprised to be met with his second son's mother holding a gun at him. A small part of his heart finds the humor in it, remembering her story of shooting at Kakarot fondly. In another lifetime and universe entirely, she'd be perfect for him.

But any world you exist in destroys the possibility.

"If you shoot me, all it's gonna do is wake the baby." Vegeta slurs, vision hazy as his body fails to fully recover from your assault. The number you did on his back is just as powerful as the crack you knocked against his skull, rendering him unable to even stand to his full height as he crashes against a wall.

"You bullshitting around will wake him too." Bulma hisses and drops the gun to her side, hurrying to kneel beside Vegeta as he slides to the floor.

"Being heavily concussed is not bullshitting." Vegeta slaps his palm to his face, your old handkerchief willing the sick-to-his-stomach feeling away once again— it does not, however, dissuade his rage. "Where's my wife?"

Bulma can't help the sting and the sinking feeling in her stomach; Vegeta had obviously made his choice, and though she knew the chances of really being chosen and wanted were incredibly slim… it's still painful to hear after all she's gone through with him.

"She's gone." Bulma mumbles as she examines the forming bruise on his temple.

Vegeta's eye twitches as his blood boils, the vein at his forehead bulging at her words. She let you go and he's lost you again.

I cannot accept this.

"Get me a ship." The prince seethes, trembling as he does his best to detain his wrath and desire for vengeance. Bulma's intentions were surely selfish, but reasonable all the same. He's a bad, horrible man that's only brought havoc among those around him, and so he might as well just keep on with the destruction until he's satisfied. "Now."

"You can't even stand, much less travel through space." Bulma hisses and pushes her knuckle harshly to his bruise, her point proven as his eyes cross and the room spins. "And she did this for a reason. The mother in me can't just let you fuck that up for her."

"What, like you're friends now?" Vegeta buries his nose into the handkerchief yet again, closing his eyes to still the world around him. "I find that incredibly hard to believe."

"She knocked you out cold to get the hell outta dodge, and you think I'm lying?" Bulma picks up her pistol from the carpet and tucks it into her waistband, the cool metal chilling her heated skin. "I'd never call us friends in this lifetime. But I do respect her, that's for sure. Maybe you should try that out?"

"How dare you." Vegeta huffs into your handkerchief. "You told her about the Androids, didn't you?"

"Damn right I did! Trunks came back to us for a reason, Vegeta! Do you wanna die to those bastards?" Bulma's eyes are fierce, her conviction planting her feet firmly to the floor and her fists curl tightly at her sides as she remembers the pain in her son's voice when he gave his terrible warning. "And don't try and feed me any bullshit that we'll win and it's nothing to worry about— YOU ALL FUCKING DIED!"

Even in his slurry, wrathful state he can see the worry behind the rage: the tears in her eyes are more than a dead giveaway. Ever since his son traveled back to deliver his warning, she's been fretful and more than a little clingy. She truly has such little faith in Vegeta and the others? Do they train for nothing in her eyes?

"I have survived more dangerous things than a couple of robots. We've been warned sufficiently, and by the time they're a threat to us we'll have three Super Saiyans."

"You had three Super Saiyans then too. Take this seriously, Vegeta! I can't beg you enough, I can't make you understand!" Bulma's thin frame trembles in the midst of her duress and her cheeks are flushed a bright red. It's now that Vegeta realizes the weight she's lost as she rubs at her temples, her cropped tank top pulling up slightly— her ribs are more visible than they once were.

Vegeta's jaw sets tightly. "I understand the situation, Bulma. But understand this: the boy will have very little if he doesn't have his mother."

Bulma falters for a moment, cutting her eyes to him with slightly parted lips; Vegeta never calls her by her name. He's still crumpled to the floor and the old lady's favor is pressed closely to his cheek— she can only assume it's some odd Saiyan thing. And for the first time out of several nights together, she truly gets the sense that they are parents and having adult discussions as them.

How terribly cruel is her fate of loving a man that's never been hers and never will be.

"That would only happen if I died, Vegeta."

"Dying on a battlefield isn't the only way to do so. You'll worry and stress yourself to the grave like this— I trust you to be a good mother. Trust me to be a father. I've already promised to amend my mistakes, haven't I?"

"Forgive me for not knowing if I can trust that." Bulma snaps at him, face reddened again at his lecture. Is he telling her how to be a parent?? The audacity of a man! "The thing about trust is that it has to be earned, y'know."

Vegeta gnashes his teeth together and looks away, the guilt of his past actions hitting like a shotgun blast to the chest as it bites his ass in this dreary long run. "What do you want me to do then??"

"Try being a dad, like you were before all of this happened? If you don't want to be with me-" Her breath hitches just a bit in her throat, but she still perseveres, proving to be braver than almost anybody Vegeta's ever known. "Then don't. I-I love you, but… It's not what I need the most. It's not what Trunks needs for a healthy childhood. To even have a childhood at all, he needs you around. Please, Vegeta… Please don't abandon him." She closes her eyes and turns her head in a failed attempt to hide the tears that fall, a shudder taking her entire body in very lightly chaotic loosening of her emotional lid. An heiress to the most fruitful fortune on Earth has never been more in need of a break.

With a deep inhale, Vegeta pushes himself up from the floor and, with the grace of mercy winning against his throbbing concussion, he pulls his son's mother into a close embrace. His hand at the back of her head, Vegeta tucks her face into the crook of his neck and closes his eyes at the feeling of her tears on his skin.

"To say I hold no love for you is a lie." His deep voice buzzes against the shell of her ear. "You cared for me when no one else has, and even at my most selfish I didn't take it for granted. You are special, Bulma. I will return to raise my son— Nothing in this galaxy will stop me."

She may end up the fool again, but the conviction in Vegeta's words is far too believable for her to deny. He'll come back and protect Trunks' future, and young Gohan's too. He's not the cruel man he was when he first came to Earth— and he hasn't been that man for a long time now.

"Now…" Vegeta murmurs into her ear. "Get me a ship."

The planet's as quiet as it's ever been, and it's unsettling. Only in his wildest dreams could he imagine the way his people trained here, getting stronger and preparing themselves for any battle or hostile takeover they launched. The Saiyans would surely have ruled the galaxy, had they been given the time to build a true dynasty. It would have been magnificent.

But instead, he lives his life in this desolate place, with no purpose or even another person that understands him in sight. His father's been long gone and his mother…

Is a complicated problem of his.

V's jaw ticks as his anger swells him into Super Saiyan yet again. His whole life has been a lie— it only took you well over ten years to admit it. And he gets the strange feeling that it was all due to an accident, and that you'd have never willingly let the truth come to light.

V's just come home from a training binge, and from the moment he touched down in his ship, the energy was… off. He sprints home, a tickle of fear and adrenaline rushing his heart as he nears the house he grew up in. Bursting through the door, the sound of your cries hits his sharply-tuned ears and his arms feel light and cold now as he fears the worst.

"Mom!" Your dutiful son follows the noise to your bedroom, dropping beside you hastily as he realizes your position on the floor. Clutching your heart, you're curled into yourself with tears streaming along your cheeks. He's never seen you cry before. "What's wrong?! Are you hurt?!"

"He's dead." Your voice is hoarse, a barely-there whisper as you tremble like a leaf.

"Who?" V gathers you carefully in his arms, holding you gently as you did him when he was a young boy. He's grown up quite a lot, gotten stronger and taller and he'll kill anyone that's hurt his mother like this. You're all he has to cherish.

"Vegeta." Your eyes are near-glassy, and surely you're delusional now. V himself isn't dead, and the only other person you could possibly be this sick over is…

His father, Vegeta the Fourth, that's been dead for almost twenty years now.

"What do you mean?" V mumbles. "My father died a long time ago."

"No…" Your nails dig into the flesh of your breast, your poor heart cracking and pulling apart as your blood sears your veins and pumps a horrible migraine that throbs at your temples worse than any concussion you've ever had.

There's no other possible answer: your soul itself is dying, and it's not entirely unfeasible that Vegeta didn't die. He was always a rebel type, so who was to say that he hadn't ignored the regrouping order sent out? Hell, you certainly ignored it yourself when you were informed by your father-in-law, the King himself, to come back home with his grandson to meet with King Cold.

"Mom, be serious now!" V frowns; you're out of your mind. "We need to get you to a doctor."

"He's dead, he's dead, he's dead…" Your broken voice chants and stars flood your vision as the image of your husband, particularly from the last day you saw him, settles at the forefront of your mind. This pain is a far cry from anything you've ever felt— the broken bones, bruises and even giving birth could never compare.

V lays you on your bed, covering you with your favorite blanket that's got a strange, orange and black striped animal printed on it. "I'm gonna get some help, okay? Stay here, Momma." His icy veins throb with panic as he scrambles to someone that can help— you've never been sick before, and until now he didn't even think mothers could be sick.

Your homey little planet is small, and you've never socialized all that much with your neighbors. Enough to be friendly and have an occasional dinner together, but never enough for you to let V have a sleepover or even some sort of field trip without you being close by. He doesn't know if this is typical of Saiyan mothers or if you're just different, but either way it's biting him in the ass now as he struggles to think of anyone who—

Your energy fades further and he's got no choice but to go knocking at every door he can until someone cares enough to hear him out. And it's the odd old lady a few houses down that answers his call, and he must have quite the look on his face for her to look so shocked.

"Vegeta, dear, what's wrong?"

"My mom- I-I don't- I think she's dying!" Tears fill V's dark eyes and without much preamble, he's scooping the old woman into his arms and flying back home as fast as he possibly can, his force unintentionally though uncaringly shattering the windows of all the neighbors that didn't open up to help him.

Dizzy, the elderly neighbor holds her head once V sets her down by your bedside. You clutch your heart still, crying and repeating yourself as if you've gone mad; and maybe you have, at this point.

"My father died when I was young, but she keeps saying he's just died." V explains as he takes your hand and prays to any deity that will listen to his plea.

"Hmm." She examines the mating scar on your neck, but it's more than enough to tell her what she needs to know. "You're Saiyans, yes?"

"We are." V mumbles. "How did you know?"

"I knew since the day your Momma brought you here." She murmurs to him. "You're a unique set of people."

"Well, do you know what's wrong with her??"

Her face is too grim for V's comfort. "She's telling the truth: her mate has died."

"Vegeta…" You whimper, a fresh slew of tears cascading your cheeks.

"That doesn't make any sense! He died years ago, when I was little!"

"She's dying of a broken heart. This behavior is like most species that can bond. You see how she holds her heart, hear how delirious she is? This is the risk of bonding, boy, and why many cultures outlawed the practice."

"So I have to let her die?! There's no way to save her?!"

"There isn't."

And then you recovered a few hours later, and just kept on lying and denying it all. Dad's alive. Mom's a liar. Or is Dad alive? He must be after all, if you're still breathing. And he knows you are; he reckons he would've felt something inside of him snap if he'd killed you all those months ago. A mother and son duo so close could never not feel such a tragic separation.

"I don't want to kill you, Mother." V mutters darkly as he stares a hole into the ground. "I just want the truth."

The hairs on the back of your neck stand as you approach your son's stomping grounds. It's been years since you last set foot here and all you hope for now is that you'll be able to leave it after this fight, with your son in tow and thoroughly reminded of his place.

Once you're out of the ship's hatch and your boots crunch on the hardened, reddish-brown clay surface, you're automatically searching for V's energy. Even with your zenkai boosts and the mastered Super Saiyan form in your back pocket, the sheer power he carries is still intimidating. You're not sure if you ever truly believed your son would be so naturally strong, even though you certainly hoped he could be. Your boy is likely what Frieza was so afraid of when he ruined your home planet to mere bits.

But despite his power, yours is nothing to scoff at. Rage motivates a Saiyan like crazy and lord only knows how pissed off you are now. You haven't struggled this much and come this far even with everything that stacked against you to die at the hands of your own son. He will not win as long as you have a say in things.

It takes but a moment to locate his energy, which is pinpointed right at the center of the field you two used to run miles and miles on during training. You always beat him in tests of speed, whereas his strength overtook yours gradually as he grew up into the incredibly strong young man he is now.

As you approach, the feeling of his energy increases. He's certainly been training on his own time, as always, and he's managed to make good progress all on his own. Watching your son take your techniques and guidance and morph it into his own power and tools made you a proud Saiyan as much as a proud mother; he's inherited Vegeta's battle prowess and your creativity and blended it into a Saiyan that would've been a legend among the rest.

They took everything from us, but instead he chooses to harm me.

"Have you come to tell the truth?"

V lands before you, tall and intimidating with eyes that are cold and guarded, when they once looked at you with love and trust that was endless. You've lost your only baby and this is what remains— your heart feels the weight of your desperation to beg him to just stop this madness.

But your rage swiftly nips that in the bud.

"It's all I've ever told you, V. I don't know what kind of fantasy you'd rather me spin, but I never told you stories as a child and I don't intend to pick up the habit now."

V shakes his head slowly, taking a slow, deep inhale through his nose before looking at you once more. "Maybe if you'd told me stories, I'd trust you right now."

Okay, ow.

"I found your father."

It's not a sentence V was prepared for you to say, obviously judged by the way his eyes widen and his fists lose their tight curl. "Really?"

And there's that boy I raised.

"I sure did. And he's none too happy to hear what you've done."

And then the incredulous look is lost, hardened up into something terrible and violent once again. "And I notice you came here alone. So either you're lying again, or Father isn't the guy you said he was."

"Vegeta certainly wanted to join me, make zero mistakes about that, child." You cross your arms and stare unflinchingly at V: you refuse to be afraid of something you made with all your love and hope. "But he wanted to kill you and I said not a chance in hell to that."

"He'd kill his only son, just like that?"

"V, baby…" You sigh to yourself. Do you break the news to him? Do you anger his uneasy heart more, ruin the visage of Vegeta you've painted for him throughout his life?

"I would've welcomed him to try." V sneers, taking a step closer to you and forcing you to tilt your head back even more to still see his face.

"It's in our blood to fight, but family is off the table for us, Prince." You remind him firmly of your positions, as the Royal Family that still lives beyond the bounds of the lost planet your husband's name originated from. "We aren't low-class Saiyans with no tact or notion of civility. I taught you this many years ago."

"Hard to tell what's true and what's not when it comes from you."

"And what reason would I have had to lie to you? You've never given me much of an answer on this."

"You'd have to tell me! I know you hid things but you won't just come out and say why! You almost died because my Father did!"

"Oh, not this again!" You turn away, perhaps foolishly taking your eyes off of your well-presumed opponent. "I don't know what happened that day, V. I truly believed in my heart that your father died when our planet was lost. It wasn't until I saw him with my own eyes that I realized that wasn't the case. What do you want me to say? I'm sorry? Because I definitely am. I'm sorry you grew up the way you did. I'm sorry your father wasn't in your life. If I knew there was even the slightest chance he was alive, I would've found him for your sake before even my own. But I didn't know he was alive. I can't change that, and I can't tell you anything other than this and call it the truth because this is the truth."

"No! You knew that day he was dead for real, and then brushed it off like what happened was normal! You felt it in your soul and almost died too. You can't tell me half of a truth and think it's acceptable! I'm not an idiot, and I'm done letting you treat me like one!"

A snarl curls at your lips. Here he goes again with this song and dance, insistent you knew something you didn't and taking the word of a delirious woman before taking the one of a very sane and present one. "And I'm tired of having this same conversation with you. Mind your mother, boy."

"My mother died four years ago, the day my father did." V's fist reels back and you're quick at the ready, meeting his force with your own and a shockwave ripping through the air and disturbing the ground beneath you.

V's quick for another punch, this time aimed at your stomach and it's almost too easy for you to block it and dive your elbow down on his arm, forcing him towards his knees long enough to take a solid jab of your knee to his face. He's unphased by the pain of the bloody nose, however, as a result of your training being so thorough. Pain alone can't stop him.

His superior strength proves itself as he grabs your ankle and flings you away as if you're a gnat buzzing around his face, your back making a crackling contact with the post of one of the training ground's obstacle courses, the solid tree trunk knocking the wind out of you upon impact. And just as you taught him, V capitalizes on his advantage and presses forward with a gut punch that lands this time.

Base form isn't enough to beat him, something you already knew. Powering up into Super Saiyan isn't new to your clashes with V, but now with its optimization he has far less opportunity to take you out, now that you've negged the energy drain. Your son can use Super Saiyan himself, but without a room of space and time, there's no possible way he could've mastered it entirely like you have.

Your golden glow that reflects off of his face reminds you briefly of the very first time you ascended to the legend. Your broken heart caused such a response, and you still feel it break further as you're forced to use such a power on the boy you birthed. He cannot see reason on his own or by words alone, and if being beaten into submission is the only way, then so be it.

He will know his place.

The stars are familiar as Vegeta presses the ship as fast as it can go, Bulma's words ringing out in the quietness of his mind.

"She said something about the old training grounds. The one you liked the most. Apparently the kid likes it too."

His heart jumps when the reddened clay of the planet comes into view. There's no mistaking it— this is where you are, and just as importantly, where his long lost son is. Despite his infractions and how he's lost his damn mind, Vegeta can hardly contain the bubbling feeling inside of him at the prospect of reuniting with the boy he lost the chance to raise. His heir is so close, for the first time in twenty years.

Hopefully you've got the situation handled— Vegeta's trip started a few hours after yours, thanks to the lack of senzu beans at Bulma's and Korin being a stingy thing. But he knows these stars well, knows the way to a home that doesn't exist anymore and his gift of navigation doesn't fail in an abyss so vast.

From the moment he breaks into the planet's atmosphere, he feels it. Your familiar energy amped up by Super Saiyan and another, incredibly strong energy keeping up a good pace. That's his boy, so strong and powerful? You've trained him so well, made him exactly what he was destined to be had Planet Vegeta lived on. And perhaps that's the root of V's downfall— he has all the training and yet none of the experience.

But he's aiming to kill, and you're not. And such is your downfall.

The hackles of your tail rise, and so does your son's. It's enough to warrant a pause in your battle, one that's gone on for so long you've lost track of time. Stamina was never a question though, never something meant to be an obstacle for Saiyan elites and it certainly isn't proving to be one now.

"Who the hell is that?" V mutters to himself as your heart battles between soaring and shrouding.

"Vegeta." You swallow thickly and feel a trickle of ice in your veins. How is he here, and—

Bulma. That pain in the ass!

Vegeta's out of the ship as soon as he can be, flying out and locating you both with ease.

"Father?" V's face briefly loses its rage and in what's left, you see the boy you raised. The one who could only dream of knowing his father, the one that would ask for stories of Prince Vegeta IV.

"That's right, son." Vegeta's eyes water. His boy, his son has grown into exactly how he'd envisioned; a spitting image of himself, and bitterly he realizes how much taller V is. How unfair for his son to take on his grandfather's genes, whereas Vegeta himself took after his own mother…

V's brief glimmer of starstruck doesn't last. His hands glow, gathering energy once more. "This doesn't concern you; my whole life never has." His growl loses a bit of punch as an unavoidable tear glides down his cheek. To finally meet his father…

"On the contrary," Vegeta quickly powers into Super Saiyan, quietly hoping it'll give him enough power to subdue his firstborn. "V, I think it's way past time I be a parent. Starting right now. Stand down and mind yourself, boy."

"Who are you to threaten me?!" V's temper flares again, this time sending a beam of deadly light at Vegeta. Vegeta's eyes narrow, brow creasing angrily at the attack, and with a flash he's dodged it and has V by the collar of his uniform.

"Your father. Me and your mother, mostly her, brought you into this world, and where your mother has her maternal instincts not to kill you…" Vegeta leans in closer to his son's face. "I will take you out of this world without another thought if you threaten my wife. One. More. Time."

"You don't have enough hatred." V spits out and knocks Vegeta's hand aside.

Anger flares up in your husband's eyes and his blood boils. Oh, the nerve of this child! He's as cocky as… Vegeta himself. He was always going to be this way. And Vegeta likely would've been proud, had your lives gone in the direction he planned.

"I've got a spare son to raise, so try me all you want, boy!" Vegeta releases V's shirt, backing up and crossing his arms over.

And that, right there, is the moment V's heart truly broke.

"You've got another kid??"

"He does." You mutter darkly, eyeing Vegeta with the eyes of a mother bear, daring him to lay a finger on your precious cub. "And he should've stayed on Earth with that child."

"I'll be back for Trunks, make no mistake. But if you think you'll cast me aside again, woman, you're wrong." Vegeta turns to you and is in your face now, angry and attractive and it burns you hotter than any sun to see him here and destroying the sacrifice you made.

"I left you behind for good reason." You hiss at him, mirroring his Super Saiyan glow. "You will not lay a hand on him."

Vegeta tips his fingers up beneath your chin, his lips a hair's breadth away. "If he minds himself, then you've got a deal, Princess."

"You should be training for the Androids."

"How about I will when you do?"

"Vegeta-"

"This running away thing is done. You will return to Earth with me, as my wife, and if the boy can carry himself as the man he should be, he'll be right there with us." Vegeta's fingers carefully grasp yours, holding your hand tightly as he turns to look at his son, satisfied as your hand curls with his.

"What will it be, boy?"

V's chest heaves and your aching heart cries to comfort him. His first experience that he'll remember of his father, and the asshole has shoved in his face he's got another son! You'd forgotten how cruel Vegeta's temper could be.

"Vegeta." You hiss sharply. "Do you really think this is how you should approach-"

A monstrous, angry roar deafens you and your husband. V's power swells and the glow of Super Saiyan bathes him, your entire little family now officially ascended to the legend. Hatred burns in V's eyes now, more prevalent and angry than ever as his increased speed gives him the chance to blindside you and Vegeta with a heavy tackle that makes your head rush.

Blinding light from his palms force you to cross your wrists over your face to shield your eyes, but its sudden disappearance sends your heart into freefall.

Opening your eyes reveals your husband and son in a brawl, their near-identical faces portraying a common ideal.

Fight to kill.

[eggfucker700]

Not that anyone asked but i have an idea for an animation where a bunch of characters beat the shit out of homelander to like that and im making a list of characters i think could defeat homelander. Here’s what i have so far:

-Reigen arataka (mob psycho 100)

-bluey

-adorabat (mao mao heroes of pure heart)

-luz noceda (the owl house)

-senshi (dungeon meshi)

-mordecai and rigby (regular show)

-mob (mob psycho 100)

-markiplier (real life)

-deadpool

-goku

-popeye

-bugs bunny

-omni man

-any of the powerpuff girls individually

-godzilla

-saitama (one punch man)

-robocop

-the terminator

-captain kirk

-darth vader

-Superman

-every single power ranger

-doc ock

-any spider person from the spiderverse movies

-gojo

-deku (mha)

-john wick

-mike tyson

-finn (adventure time)

-jenny (my life as a teenage robot)

-SpongeBob

-any iteration of the tmnt

-ben 10

-anne boonchuy -amphibia

-every Jojo protagonist

-michiru kagemori (brand new animal)

-luffy (one piece)

-sanji (one piece)

-ussop (one piece)

-tony tony chopper (one piece)

-robin (one piece)

-zoro (one piece)

-mashle (mashle muscles and magic)

-yor briar (spy x family)

-jimmy nuetron

-batman (no prep time)

-sailor moon

-denji (chainsaw man)

-tetsuo shima (akira)

-astro boy

-the hulk

-thor (marvel)

-wonder woman (dc)

-gumball watterson

-nicole watterson

-Richard watterson

-sans undertale

-frisk undertale

-ash ketchum (no Pokemon, only hands)

-kirby

-truck kun

-the collector (the owl house)

-uncle grandpa

-po (kung fu panda)

-sonic the hedgehog

-jebediah kerman (kerbal space program)

-danny phantom

-my latinx self insert’s chimichanga stand

If anyone has any suggestions please tell me

[fortunesque]

WIP Wednesday

Here's a bit of a future chapter of Think of Me (Raditz x Reader, rated E). It's getting a little harder to find stuff to share for WIP Wednesday because most of the stuff I have at this point is either major spoiler heavy, or smut. Thankfully, this is neither 😅

The drinks have done a lot to open him up; Raditz is leaning back in his seat, with his feet propped up on a chair across from him. His tail is draped over the side of the chair and lays on the floor.

Between his tail, lounging around, and crazy amount of hair, Raditz reminds Yamcha more of a lion, than anything.

It's so weird to him that Raditz gets treated like such a loser. He's a really cool dude, at least, in Yamcha's opinion. He's certain that a lot of people on Earth would find him cool, too.

Maybe, he's not cool out in space? That's not really fair, though.

Well, Raditz is more than welcome to chill with him anytime. He's a cool dude.

Raditz shrugs. "Look, it wasn't really complicated. Power level is lower? Shoot em. Power level is higher? Get the fuck out."

"Wait, so you'd run away?" Yamcha asks.

Raditz rolls his eyes.

"Of course," he says. "I'm not going to get fucked up by natives just because some rich asshole wants to build a resort planet. Fuck 'em."

He brings his fingers up to his mouth, then sighs in frustration and puts his hand down.

Yamcha's seen Bulma do the same thing when she's done one of her many attempts to stop smoking. He wonders what kind of invisible smoke Raditz is craving, right now.

It's absolutely wild to him that this is Goku's brother. They don't look a thing alike, for starters. Not only that, but Raditz cusses and talks shit like a thug.

It's surprising, though, that he doesn't talk about getting laid, or about what women are like out there in the galaxy. Raditz almost talks like he's a taken man.

Maybe he is, and he's just not aware of that, yet.

Yamcha thinks there's something more going on with you and Raditz. Realistically, though, a long distance relationship is hard to maintain.

He thinks it's a good thing, though. Bulma says Raditz seems to have perked up quite a bit. Good sex with a beautiful woman will do that, but—

Yamcha swears there's more to it. You two looked right together when you curled up on the couch in his lap.

He's going to see if he can get Raditz to talk about you more, then talk to Bulma about it.

He can't help but notice, too, that Raditz cusses way less around you and doesn't talk about anything too violent.

Yeah, Raditz is trying to leave a good impression by being polite with you.

Good. That's a very good start. It's how Yamcha started reforming.

He hopes that Raditz makes friends along the way. One woman can't bear all of that. Goodness knows Bulma couldn't. Little Goku was a godsend to keep Yamcha in line. Maybe, Yamcha should be Raditz' Goku?

Yikes. Those are massive shoes to fill.

Yamcha should probably call Krillin to come help.

He makes up his mind; he's going to ask Raditz if he wants to train with him. The guy has potential in all sorts of ways.

And, it's a way they can hang out. Because, Raditz is cool.

[mosthomoeroticenemies]

The Contestants

Cherik (Professor X/Magneto) - X-Men

Fuffy (Faith Lehane/Buffy Summers) - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Megop (Optimus Prime/Megatron) - Transformers

Curtwen (Curt Mega/Owen Carvour) - Spies are Forever

Thoschei (The Doctor/The Master) - Doctor Who

Perryshmirtz (Perry the Platypus/Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz) - Phineas and Ferb

Catradora (Adora/Catra) - She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

Soukoku (Osamu Dazai/Chuuya Nakahara) - Bungo Stray Dogs

c!TnTDuo (c!Quackity/c!Wilbur Soot) - Dream SMP

Spy/Supervillain - Genghis Khan by Miike Snow

Batman/Joker - Lego Batman

Wrightworth (Phoenix Wright/Miles Edgeworth) - Ace Attorney

Batjokes (Batman/Joker) - Batman

Lawlight (L/Light Yagami) - Death Note

Bowiugi (Bowser/Luigi) - Mario

Stanarrator (Narrator/Stanley) - The Stanley Parable

Kidlaw (Eustass Kid/Trafalgar Law) - One Piece

Shuake (Goro Akechi/Akira Kurusu) - Persona 5

Cuttletavio (Craig Cuttlefish/DJ Octavio) - Splatoon

Gethan (Rupert Giles/Ethan Rayne) - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Zosan (Roronoa Zoro/Sanji) - One Piece

ChellDOS (Chell/GLaDOS) - Portal

Jesus Christ/Judas Iscariot - The New Testament

Gwensuzie (Gwen Cooper/Suzie Costello) - Torchwood

Krisnix (Phoenix Wright/Kristoph Gavin) - Ace Attorney

Griffguts (Guts/Griffith) - Berserk

Hannigram (Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter) - Hannibal

Ghiralink (Ghirahim/Link) - Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword

Valvert (Javert/Jean Valjean) - Les Miserables

Abestache (Detective Abe Lincoln/Wilford Warfstache) - Markiplier Cinematic Universe

Sasunaru (Naruto/Sasuke) - Naruto

Jedediah/Octavius - Night at the Museum

Nami/Kalifa - One Piece

Gabv1el (V1/Gabriel) - Ultrakill

Kazumaji (Kazuma Kiryu/Goro Majima) - Yakuza

Zukka (Zuko/Sokka) - Avatar: The Last Airbender

Ineffable Husbands (Aziraphale/Crowley) - Good Omens

Billford (Bill Cipher/Stanford Pines) - Gravity Falls

Evelyn Deavor/Elastigirl - Incredibles 2

Jennifer Check/Needy Lesnicki - Jennifer’s Body

Kigo (Kim Possible/Shego) - Kim Possible

Sportarobbie (Sportacus/Robbie Rotten) - Lazy Town

Swan Queen (Emma Swan/Regina Mills) - Once Upon a Time

Hardenshipping (Magma Leader Maxie/Aqua Leader Archie) -Pokemon OmegaRuby and AlphaSapphire

Westley/Inigo Montoya - Princess Bride

Sonadow (Sonic/Shadow) - Sonic the Hedgehog

Plabs (Plankton/Mr. Krabs) - SpongeBob SquarePants

Kylux (General Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren) - Star Wars

Johnchurch (Merle Highchurch/John Hunger) - The Adventure Zone: Balance

Basigan (Professor Ratigan/Basil of Baker Street) - The Great Mouse Detective

LonelyEyes (Elias Buchard/Peter Lukas) - The Magnus Archives

Johnjack (Jack Harkness/John Hart) - Torchwood

Blicy (Bloom/Icy) - Winx Club

Riddlebat (Batman/The Riddler) - Batman comics

Shin Soukoku (Atsushi Nakajima/Ryuunosuke Akutagawa) - Bungo Stray Dogs

Snowbaz (Baz Pitch/Simon Snow) - Carry On

Komahina (Nagito Komaeda/Hajime Hinata) - Danganronpa

Wonder Woman/Cheetah - DC

Spamvil (Jevil/Spamton) - Deltarune

Rk1000 (Connor/Markus) - Detroit: Become Human

John McClane/Hans Gruber - Die Hard

Fenders (Fenris/Anders) - Dragon Age 2

Vegekaka (Goku/Vegeta) - Dragon Ball Z

Rapple (Apple White/Raven Queen) - Ever After High

Billdip (Bill Cipher/Dipper Pines) - Gravity Falls

Radiostatic (Vox/Alastor) - Hazbin Hotel

Sirdust (Angel Dust/Sir Pretious) - Hazbin Hotel

Fengqing (Feng Xin/Mu Qing) - Heaven Official’s Blessing

Blitzer (Blitzø/Striker) - Helluva Boss

Martha May Whovier/Betty Lou Who - How the Grinch Stole Christmas

ZaDr (Zim/Dib) - Invader Zim

Sarumi (Fushimi Saruhiko/Yata Misaki) - K Project

Metadede (King Dedede/Meta Knight) - Kirby

Gandalf/Sauron - Lord of the Rings

Island Husbands (Ben Linus/John Locke) - Lost

Metromind (Megamind/Metro Man) - Megamind

Sherliam (Sherlock Holmes/William James Moriarty) - Moriarty the Patriot

Bujeet (Buford/Bajeet) - Phineas and Ferb

Grovyle/Dusknoir - Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time, Darkness, and Sky

Shassie (Shawn Spencer/Carlton “Lassie” Lassiter) - Psych

Rayaari (Raya/Namaari) - Raya and the Last Dragon

Tycutio (Mercutio/Tybalt) - Romeo and Juliet

Sherliam (Sherlock Holmes/James Moriarty) - Sherlock

Obikin (Anakin Skywalker/Obi-Wan Kenobi) - Star Wars

Obimaul (Obi-Wan Kenobi/Darth Maul) - Star Wars

Oncelax (The Onceler/The Lorax) - The Lorax

Owen Harper/Mark Lynch - Torchwood

Lord Hater/Wander - Wander Over Yonder

Gelphie (Elphaba/Galinda) - Wicked

Cruellanita (Cruella de Vil/Anita) - 101 Dalmations

Angelo Lagusa/Nero Vanetti - 91 Days

Discotrain (The Conductor/DJ Grooves) - A Hat in Time

Klapollo (Klavier Gavin/Apollo Justice) - Ace Attorney

Wrightdot (Godot/Phoenix Wright) - Ace Attorney

Kaneda/Tetsuo - Akira

Sydney Bristow/Lauren Reed - Alias

Ellen Ripley/The Xenomorph - Alien

Zadison (Zoe Benson/Madison Montgomery) - American Horror Story: Coven

Sterling Archer/Barry Dylan - Archer

Y’all (The Poll Takers)/Me (The Poll Maker) - askeletonwar

Just Walk Out!/Papyrus - askeletonwar

Londo Mollari/G’kar - Babylon 5

Rampage/Depth Charge - Beast Wars: Transformers

Pinariz (Riz/Pina) - Beastars

Kunieda Aoi/Hildegarde - Beezlebub

Sebagrell (Grell/Sebastian) - Black Butler

Gus Fring/Walter White - Breaking Bad

Spangel (Spike/Angel) - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Spuffy (Spike/Buffy) - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Winteriron (Tony Stark/The Winter Soldier) - Captain America: Civil War

Stucky (Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes) - Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Carulia (Carmen Sandiego/Julia Argent) - Carmen Sandiego

Macavity/Munkustrap - Cats (1998)

Caius Marcius Coriolanus/Tullus Aufidius - Coriolanus

Dean Pelton/Dean Spreck - Community

Shadowghast (Caleb Widogast/Essek Thelyss) - Critical Role

Blumentrio (Caleb Widogast/Eadwulf Grieve/Astrid Becke) -Critical Role

Theopin (Lapin Cadbury/Sir Theobald Gumbar) - D20: A Crown of Candy

Hero/Villain - dannyphantom.exe

Clex (Superman/Lex Luthor) - DC

Babsquinn (Batgirl/Harley Quinn) - DC

Seavil (Jevil/Seam) - Deltarune

Rengoku Kyoujurou/Akaza - Demon Slayer

Mal/Uma - Descendants

Reed800 (Connor/Gavin Reed) - Detroit: Become Human

Ryokira (Akira/Ryo) - Devilman

Maxwil (Maxwell/Wilson) - Don't Starve

Nikki/Mackenzie - Dork Diaries

Gell/Frisky - Dot X

Dr. Horrible/Captain Hammer - Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog

Count Dracula/Jonathan Harker - Dracula

Joan Watson/Jamie Moriarty - Elementary

Zerxus Ilerez/Asmodeus - Exandria Unlimited: Calamity

Gratsu (Natsu Dragneel/Gray Fullbuster) - Fairy Tail

Gary/John - Faith

Peter Griffin/The Chicken - Family Guy

John Crichton/Scorpius - Farscape

Emiya Archer/Cu Chulainn - Fate Stay Night

Angeal Hewley/Genesis Rhapsodos/Sephiroth - Final Fantasy VII

Cidnero (Nero tol Scaeva/Cid Garlond) - Final Fantasy XIV

Willry (Henry Emily/William Afton) - Five Nights at Freddy’s

Victor Frankenstein/The Monster - Frankenstein

Cure Peach/Eas - Fresh Pretty Cure!

Haikaveh (Alhaitham/Kaveh) - Genshin Impact

Sugio (Sugimoto/Ogata) - Golden Kamuy

Nygmobblepot (Edward Nygma/Oswald Cobblepot) - Gotham

Mabifica (Mabel Pines/Pacifica Northwest) - Gravity Falls

Kagehina (Hinata/Kageyama) - Haikyuu!

[tobiasdrake]

I've been thinking about Mystique's costume (or lack thereof) in the X-Men movies, and I have to wonder: is there a way to portray an attractive naked woman as a serious, scary threat without sexualizing them? I just wonder because I think of these two enemies in the video game Outlast who everyone loves because of how legitimately terrifying they are, and also the fact that they're completely naked when they stalk you. I feel like a female equivalent of them would be awesome.

I think the key word there is "attractive". There isn't really a non-sexualized way to hire a supermodel to strut around the set naked regardless of gender because that is a sexually-charged creative decision to make. There isn't really a non-sexual reason why you would want a character to be portrayed as a nude supermodel.

There has been female nudity in media which comes across as monstrous rather than alluring. The trick with making female nudity unappealing is the same as with male: If you want the character to come across as monstrous, you have to design them as a monster. Let her be ugly. Let her have a fucked up face and a body type that isn't conventionally attractive like those two neanderthal-looking guys have.

If you're going for "supermodel bombshell" and "serious threat", that's not a monster. That's a femme fatale. Mystique is a femme fatale. That's a different vibe. Femme fatales, incidentally, are com-pli-cated subject matter when it comes to gender.

The topic touches on the larger conversation about the way female characters are often shaped to be appealing as sex objects while male characters are shaped to be appealing as power fantasies.

Like. Goku gets his clothes blasted off a lot. So do a bunch of female anime characters. But when it happens to women, they don't usually come away looking like this.

"Oh no, my clothes! Now everyone will see how powerful my muscles are! You could slice meat on these abs!"

As a consequence of the male gaze dominating media landscapes, female nudity is often designed to be appealing to men while male nudity is designed to also be appealing to men.

But the femme fatale is complicated. The femme fatale marries sexuality and power together. She's an alluring sex object and a powerful, lethal woman. Everybody fucking loves Ada Wong. Whether they want to sleep with her or be her, I have never met a single person who does not love Ada Wong.

That fight in X-Men 1 where Wolverine is roaring and slashing while Mystique's bouncing around in Full Monty really puts a spotlight on it. Like, that's it. That is male vs. female character design in a nutshell right there. It's hard to claim that the intent is to feel empowered by the naked supermodel jumping around on set. Nonetheless, she dominates the fight and kicks Wolverine's ass.

Then you have characters like Bayonetta. And opinions are very divided on Bayonetta. Hell, even in my household, opinions are divided on Bayonette. Bestie loathes Bayonetta with every fiber of their being and their wife has ravenously consumed every game Bayonetta's ever appeared in.

IDK. Female sexuality and its relationship to both objectification and empowerment is an extremely complicated topic and I am not the person to make any definitive statement on the matter.

[sailormoonandme]

Mamoru is NOT useless in the Anime Part Tri: Power & Worth

Last time we compared Anime and Manga Mamoru's power levels in order to dissect the idea that anime Mamoru, in being less powerful than Usagi is unworthy of being her romantic partner.

However, there was a lot more I wanted to unpack from this particular idea the 'Mamoru is useless' brigade are prone to pushing. Specifically on the very notion of linking power to worthiness.

Power Creep

This is one of my shorter points but, its seems rather insane to suggest that Mamoru needs to be of a minimal power level to be worthy of Usagi.

Usagi in both versions is at least functionally the most powerful entity in the known universe. Even if we go arc by arc, she is almost always the most powerful person on the good guys team. The time period before she obtained the Silver Crystal was only time when the gap in power between herself and the other Senshi was in any way close, and even then it depended on who you were talking about. Mercury was clearly weaker than Usagi, her attack was a glorified smokescreen. Was she unworthy of Usagi's friendship? Were Makoto and Rei the MOST worthy of Usagi's friendship because they were the most powerful Senshi?

Did they all become progressively less worthy of her time and affection as Usagi steadily grew ever more powerful across the series? In Crystal Tokyo, when Usagi could transform the barren frozen Earth into a glittering utopia, did she have 0 friends because she was now just THAT powerful?

Was Star Serious Laser just so powerful that it meant Seiya ranked highest of all for Usagi's affections? After all, I do not see anyone arguing that Seiya was not powerful enough to be worthy of Usagi's love...almost like there is a double standard in play...

And how demeaning of Neo-Queen Serenity, who was so powerful she could terraform a lifeless planet Earth into a glittering utopia, to allow the now incalculably weaker King Endymion to have sex with her and thereby conceive Chibi-Usa.

Or...does this work by you simply have to be of a minimal power level and then you can be worthy of Usagi no matter how powerful she gets?

Please enlighten me fellow Moonies?

Power DOES NOT = Worthiness

Finally...isnt it just plain old reductive to equate power with worthiness?

Sailor moon is a super hero at the end of the day, so let's look at examples from other superhero fiction. In fact, lets look at the most famous example within the genre.

Superman is by far and away the most famous (though not necesarilly popular) of all superheroes across the globe. Superman can fly, has super streangth, super speed, enhanced durability, heat vision, x-ray vision and sometimes can freeze stuff with his breath. And whilst the exact degree of all of those abilities has varied (originally he was stronger than ten men, later he could pull multiple planets at the same time) he has always been mindbogglingly more powerful than even the most elite of human athletes.

And who has he frequently been paired up with from the past 85 years?

Oh, that's right. A human woman, Lois Lane. She might be extraordinary in her own way, but she isn't going to be bench-pressing a tank anytime soon.

Ah, but there are those who reject the most famous superhero couple in pop culture for that very reason, arguing that Superman should instead be with someone who is powerful in their own right like he is. Someone like, say, Wonder Woman?

The problem here being that...well...Wonder Woman is almost always weaker than Superman. By a WIDE margin. At the end of the day, she is incredibly strong but her strength has limits whilst Superman's are in fact dependant upon circumstances. If he absorbes enough yellow sunlight he is functionally limitless in how powerful he can become. So...is Wonder Woman unworthy of Superman too?

Regardless, let's instead turn our attentions to something more comparable to Sailor Moon.

In Dragon Ball Z the Goku and Vegeta and Gohan can annihilate whole Solar Systems but Mary human women, falling for them because of their strong, wilful and aggressive personalities.

In Yu Yu Hakusho, written by Naoko Takeuchi's husband, the main character is a demonic prince basically and falls for a normal human.

How about all the boxers, MMA fighters, wrestlers and action movie stars who marry people who are not in those kinds of professions, people who are physically weaker than them?

All of them unworthy too?

Power DOES NOT = Worthiness, regardless of gender

Ah, but these are all where the man is more powerful. But...if we argue that the situation is different in the reverse...isn't that just a classic (say it with me folks) double standard?

Are we to seriously entertain the rather backwards argument that a man is not worthy of a woman's affection if they are weaker than her?

If so let's look at some other examples.

She Hulk has dated normal humans Wyatt Wingfoot and John Jameson.

Carol Danvers has the power of a star and has fallen in love with War Machinw, who is a man with high tech armour nowhere close to that power level.

Jean Grey has been more powerful than her lovers Cyclops and Wolverine since even before she became the Phoenix, a cosmic entity so powerful it consumes stars for energy.

Wonder Woman has the power of the Greek Gods and her frequent lover, and in her original canon husband, was a regular human soldier.

In Cutey Honey F, the magical girl reboot of the classic 70s anime that helped inspire Sailor Moon, Honey can annihilate and create anything she can want. She is in love with a demonic prince, but ultimately marries a normal man and private eye who always had her back despite being put of this depth with the threats they faced.

And what about all the women in real life who have married, or remained married to men with disabilities? Men who by any metric are physically weaker than their wives? For example, all the women that married or remained married to soldiers who were horribly injured during either World War? Or, any of the wives of Stephen Hawkins, with even his first wife aware of his illness.

All of which is to say...maybe Mamo is worthy of Usagi's love regardless of him being less powerful than her.

Conclusion

Mamoru in the anime...

Is.

Not.

Useless.

Please.

For.

The.

Love.

Of.

<insert whatever/whomever you worship here>.

Fucking.

Stop.

Claiming.

He.

Is.

[superhero-smackdown]

Bracket(??) Announcement!

I have FINALLY (which I am very sorry for guys) finished going through my submissions and have created something that looks like a bracket. BUT, in order to include the most characters, I have devised a group round with 128 characters divided into 8 groups and have sorted them in a way that prevents this competition from becoming a batman vs spider-man final.

making the polls shouldn't take nearly as long so be on the lookout for those! this will be pinned and I'll make sure to edit this post with links to the polls, and matchups are not necessarily going to be heroes next to each other! matches can be made up by any two heroes in the same group

polls will last a day for now and one group will be posted per day

as of right now top 4 from each group will make it to the bracket round but that is absolutely subject to change so don't count on that

Without further ado, your Superhero Smackdown competitors!!!

GROUP 1

Peter Parker, Miles Morales, and Gwen Stacy/Spider-Men and Ghost Spider (Marvel)

Garfield Logan/Beast Boy (DC)

Steve Rogers/Captain America (Marvel)

Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler (Marvel)

The Incredibles and Frozone (Pixar)

Kori'ander/Starfire (DC)

Matt Murdock/Daredevil (Marvel)

Stephanie Brown/Spoiler (DC)

Toshinori Yagi/All Might (My Hero Academia)

Charles Xavier/Professor X (Marvel)

Jessica Jones (Marvel)

Jason Todd/Red Hood (DC)

Black Noir (The Boys)

Jim Gordon (DC)

Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Marvel)

Carol Danvers/Captain Marvel (Marvel)

GROUP 2

Kara Zor-El/Supergirl (DC)

T'Challa Udaku/Black Panther (Marvel)

Sam Wilson/Falcon/Captain America (Marvel)

Dick Grayson/Nightwing (DC)

Peter Quill/Starlord (Marvel)

Minhkhoa Khan/The Ghost-Maker (DC)

The Green Lantern Corp (DC)

Kendra Saunders/Hawkgirl (DC)

Arthur Curry/Aquaman (DC)

Cassandra Cain/Black Bat (DC)

Queen Maeve (The Boys)

Clark Kent/Superman (DC)

Kitty Pryde/Shadowcat (Marvel)

Tony Stark/Iron Man (Marvel)

Cissie King-Jones/Arrowette (DC)

Marc Spector, Steve Grant, Jake Lockley/Moon Knight (Marvel)

GROUP 3

Barry Allen/The Flash (DC)

Starlight (The Boys)

Kate Kane/Batwoman (DC)

Darkwing Duck (DuckTales)

Shouta Aizawa/Eraserhead (My Hero Academia)

Roy Harper/Arsenal (DC)

Natasha Romanoff, Yelena Belova/Black Widow (Marvel)

Tim Drake/Red Robin (DC)

The Autobots (Transformers TV Show)

Bruce Wayne/Batman (DC)

Ororo Monroe/Storm (Marvel)

The Midnighter (DC)

Wade Wilson/Deadpool (Marvel)

Logan, James Howlett/Wolverine (Marvel)

Kon Kent/Superboy (DC)

Diana Prince/Wonder Woman (DC)

GROUP 4

Danny Fenton/Danny Phantom (Danny Phantom)

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)

The Powerpuff Girls (The Powerpuff Girls)

Izuku Midoriya/Deku (My Hero Academia)

Ben Tennyson/Ben 10 (Ben 10)

Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir (Miraculous Ladybug)

Kate Bishop/Hawkeye (Marvel)

Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug (Miraculous Ladybug)

America Chavez/Miss America (Marvel)

Kim Possible (Kim Possible)

Link and Zelda (The Legend of Zelda)

Goku (Dragon Ball Z)

The Power Rangers (The Power Rangers Series)

Kamala Khan/Miss Marvel (Marvel)

Virgil Hawkins/Static (DC)

Billy Batson/Captain Marvel/Shazam (DC)

GROUP 5

Damian Wayne/Robin (DC)

Phineas Flynn, Ferb Fletcher/The Beak (Phineas and Ferb)

Alex, Sam, and Clover (Totally Spies)

Jubilation Lee/Jubilee (Marvel)

Alya Cesaire/Rena Rouge (Miraculous Ladybug)

Flash Thompson/Agent Venom (Marvel)

Shoto Todoroki/Shoto (My Hero Academia)

Gwen Poole/Gwenpool (Marvel)

Nino Lahiffe/Carapace (Miraculous Ladybug)

Kaio Kincaid/K.O. (OK K.O.! Let's be Heroes)

Katsuki Bakugo/Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight (My Hero Academia)

Felicia Hardy/Black Cat (Marvel)

Billy Kaplan and Tommy Shepherd/Wiccan and Speed (Marvel)

Viv Vision (Marvel)

Doreen Green/Squirrel Girl (Marvel)

Mia Dearden/Speedy (DC)

GROUP 6

Undine Wells and Kokoro Aichi/Alchemical Water and Heartful Punch (Sleepless Domain)

Olive Silverlock and Maps Mizoguchi/The Detective Club (DC)

Nova Artino and Adrian Everhart/Insomia and Sketch (Renegades Trilogy)

Karen Fields/Voyd (Pixar)

Laura Kinney/X-23/Wolverine (Marvel)

William Wisp/The Wisperer (Just Roll With It)

Kagami Tsurugi/Ryuuko (Miraculous Ladybug)

Gizmoduck (DuckTales)

Dakota Cole/D.C. (Just Roll With It)

Rumi Usagiyama/Miruko (My Hero Academia)

Luka Couffaine/Viperion (Miraculous Ladybug)

Neena Thurman/Domino (Marvel)

Vyncent Sol/Virion (Just Roll With It)

Elpis (Valor Academy)

Captain Rainbow (Nintendo)

Moza/Emara (Emara)

GROUP 7

Mark Grayson/Invincible (Invincible)

Jimmy Woo (Marvel)

Kirby (Nintendo)

The Doctor (Doctor Who)

Zorro (The Mark of Zorro)

Phil Coulson (Marvel)

Megamind (Megamind)

Monkey D. Luffy (One Piece)

Donald Duck/The Duck Avenger/Paperinik (Disney)

Saitama/Caped Baldy (One Punch Man)

He-Man and She-Ra (He-Man: Masters of the Universe and She-Ra: Princess of Power)

Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic Games)

The Tick (The Tick)

Robin Hood (English Folklore)

Yamada Hizashi/Present Mic (My Hero Academia)

Klaus Hargreeves/Number 4/The Séance (The Umbrella Academy)

GROUP 8

Super Grover (Seasame Street)

Wario-Man (Nintendo)

Fanboy and Chum Chum (Fanboy and Chum Chum)

Ace and Gary/The Ambiguously Gay Duo (Saturday Night Live)

Hero Cookie (Cookie Run)

Floyd Belkin/Splitter/Arm-Fall-Off-Boy (DC)

Bob Dobalina/Bob, Agent of Hydra (Marvel)

Bibleman (Bibleman TV Show)

Larry-Boy (VeggieTales)

Sharkboy and Lavagirl (The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl)

Mermaid Man and Barnicle Boy (SpongeBob SquarePants)

Daniel MacIntyre/Cactusman/SCP-2800 (SCP Foundation)

Morbius (Morbius)

Jarro (DC)

Jeff the Land Shark (Marvel)

Steel Samurai (Ace Attorney)

[onlyglass]

you can find porn of truly any woman character of all time x goku. most notable and insane find today was. makima. saber was also a funny one. saw a wonder woman.

[madman479r]

Diana meets Goku on Themyscira

Diana walked through the forest of Themyscira, heading towards the hot springs to clean herself and relax her aching muscles. The training the Amazons did was certainly taxing, but Diana, being the Princess of Themyscira, her training was practically ten times harder.

Diana let out a tired sigh and rolled her neck with closed eyes, hoping the warm waters would help sooth her sore body.

The amazonian opened her eyes only for them to grow extremely wide in shock as she saw something she never thought she'd see on Themyscira.

It was... a man! A man on Themyscira!

Diana slowed her approach and lowered her form. Stealth wasn't a popular approach for amazonians but Diana was also taught to watch and analyse potential threats.

The man wore a blue dogi with a white knot-style sash, pink wristbands, yellow baggy pants, and black shoes with white leg wraps. Diana also couldn't help but notice how muscular the man's arms and chest was, hidden under his toned skin, and she didn't know why her face grew warm at that. Perhaps it was still the heat from her training session.

He also had wild, spikey hair that jutted out in nearly every direction but his most noticeable feature was the long and brown fur covered tail he possessed.

Diana raised a brow at that particular feature. Though her knowledge on men was limited, she was sure they didn't have tails.

'Who is this man? How did he end up on Themyscira? Was it by accident? Or was it purposeful?' The Themysciran Princess' mind raced with questions.

'Should I alert my sisters, continue to watch him, or should I confront him?' Either option had a potentially bad side to it.

Should she leave to gather warriors, the stranger may disappear.

Should she continue to observe him, the stranger may do something terrible to the unprepared amazonians.

Should she confront him, the stranger may be more powerful than anticipated and best her.

But despite the possibilities, Diana was royalty to Themyscira and it was her duty to protect her sisters, so she needed to deal with this man before he became a threat, take him in for questioning.

Diana got up from her crouch and was about to approach the stranger until the man started to strip off his clothes, revealing more of his strong and rippled body.

Diana's face grew a bright red as her eyes drank in the rather appealing sight of the stranger dipping himself into the hot spring with a relaxed exhale.

'...Perhaps I was simply overreacting. He may have a good reason for being here. I should introduce myself, its only polite...' Diana decided, making no move, still hidden as she continued to watch the show. 'After he's done bathing of course, wouldn't want to cut this shor- STARTLE HIM! I wouldn't want to startle him while he's... nude.'

"Boy this is nice. I could stay here for hours." The man said to himself.

A notion Diana could agree with.

[supergito]

Fusion Revived - CH 10 (The Power of Two)

➤ This story is actually complete (finished Sep 2021) over on my Ao3 already; I'm just publishing it here on tumblr too for archival purposes. I hope any and all curious readers enjoy if they haven't checked it out yet!

SUMMARY: Majin Buu has been destroyed, and the Earth has known peace for close to a year now. Life hasn't been too peaceful for the person responsible for saving the world and the entire universe however, but when an ordinary woman meets him one day, things start to change.

RATING: Teen and Up. PAIRING(S): Vegito x OC/Reader, alluded Gochi, alluded Vegebul CONTENT: Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Family Drama CW(s) THIS CHAPTER: None.

Those were the longest four months she’s ever had to deal with.

There wasn’t a specific date when the dragon balls would re-activate, and the vagueness of it frustrated her further. She resumed her life, going to and from work while dabbling in some of her hobbies in the meantime, but the apprehension never went away. It clung to her, in the form of memories that kept flashing in her mind and molding her dreams. She swore his face was burned into her vision, even when she closed her eyes.

She missed Vegito, obviously. But this…even she recognized how she yearned for him. She’s never had anyone she considered a genuine friend before, and if this yearning is what most people experienced when they lost a friend, she genuinely debated if her recluse lifestyle was actually saving her from a lot of heartache.

There was something different about it though. As days turned to weeks, and weeks slowly turned into months, she examined the emotions she was experiencing. She even did some searches for advice on the internet, since she was largely clueless on the matter and had no one around she felt she could get answers from.

She liked Vegito, this was true. But the realization that she was infatuated with him, drew all the air from her lungs.

She had to have been crushing on him. There was nothing else that explained how much he was in her thoughts, and how much she desired for him to be by her side. What’s more, is that it also explained why she’s just started fantasizing about him with increasing frequency. The littlest things made her think about the Saiyan.

While she’s sitting down on her couch and watching TV, she imagined Vegito next to her. It was then that she realized she had no idea what his favorite shows or movies were. Or if he even liked watching TV to begin with.

When she was out on walks, she imagined him tagging along with her. She wondered what his favorite kind of plants were. What his favorite type of weather was.

When she sorted through her large dresser for something to wear, she thought about how much extra space she had with the drawers she didn’t use. She didn’t know how much clothing Vegito owned outside of his usual get up, but she imagined he filling in those spare drawers with it.

When she settled down for the night and went to bed, she imagined he slipping in next to her. She falling asleep in his arms. That particular daydream set her heart on fire, and made it quicken into a pace that made her have to sit down.

She wanted him back.

She needed him back.

So, she checked the dragon radar at least once every day, especially after the general four month period was supposed to be up. The scan continuously picked up nothing, leaving the screen blank and her apprehension to keep spiking.

One morning, during the week she had off from her job, she checked it again.

The scan went. There was a ping. Seven tiny dots appeared on the screen’s grid, encircling the outer edges.

She’s never ran to grab her phone faster than she did in that moment.

                                                                                                             ༻ ❁ ༺

“Goku should be over there in the blink of an eye. Literally.”

“Thanks Bulma.”

She was immensely thankful the scientist thought to exchange phone numbers. She would’ve called Goku, but she remembered that she didn’t know the number of his house phone, or if he even had a cell phone. Additionally, she and Chi Chi still haven’t interacted since that day. It was all too possible that she would’ve picked up the phone instead of Goku.

Calling Bulma to relay the message to him was the best decision. The woman didn’t mind it either, having seemed a little excited herself. How funny, that she was now looking forward to seeing someone she thought she hated.

As patiently as she could, she waited for Goku to appear. The dragon radar was held tightly in her hand, and she sporadically pushed its knob to zoom out to the nearest dragon ball’s location on its grid. She didn’t quite know how to read the radar, so she didn’t know the exact distance away the ball was from her location, but it was somewhere to the northeast. Internally, she prayed it didn’t somehow disappear.

The anxiety soon became too much for she to stay seated, so she begun to pace around her living room. Fortunately, that was right when she sensed the air around her change.

“_____!”

Goku’s eyes were sparkling, as he dropped his hand from his forehead. His grin was infectious. Over his shoulder, he carried a sizable bag.

“Ready to go find some dragon balls?”

“…About that…” Recalling her lack of abilities, her excitement was dampened. She should’ve brought this up to him much sooner.

“We’ll…have to travel around the world, right? I can’t fly or anything.”

And it would be very impractical for he to carry her. Even if she took her hover car, there was no way it would be fast enough to remotely keep up with him too. Not only that, the planet was large and there was only so much her human body could do in one day before fatigue made her stop. It would be for the best for she to stay behind, surely…

“Don’t worry! I have something you can use that’ll fix all of that. It’s fast enough to not lag behind either.” Goku giggled, and gestured for her to move.

“Let’s go! I’ll show you it outside.”

She had no idea what he was talking about, but if it was possible for she to join him in this quest, she’d gladly take it. Vegito deserved the effort, and then some.

The both of them went out the front door, and she made sure to lock it behind her. She turned back to Goku, who looked up at the sky and cupped his hands around his mouth.

“FLYING NIMBUS!”

He shouted at the top of his lungs, and his voice echoed into the air. Mystified, she observed with a tilted head. Flying Nimbus?

Nothing happened right away, and for a second, she silently questioned if Goku was messing with her. However, her ears picked up on a particular sound that steadily grew louder. Her stare moved upwards, and she witnessed something yellow zooming towards the both of them, leaving a trail in the sky.

The yellow thing zipped down and slowed to a stop in front of Goku. Now that it was still, she saw that it was…a cloud. It looked fluffy and cotton-like almost, though it emitted strange puttering sounds similar to the engine of a car.

“This here’s my Nimbus cloud!” Goku turned around to face her, smiling. “I can’t remember if Vegito told you about it, but it’s what I used to get around when I was a kid since I couldn’t fly. Master Roshi gave it to me.”

“He…didn’t mention it, I don’t think.” She also couldn’t remember if he did. It’s been so long since she’s seen him.

She started walking towards him, keen on getting a closer look at the ethereal cloud. “So, I can ride this? It’ll hold my weight?”

“Sure it will! I don’t think anyone can be too heavy for Nimbus. The only rule is that you have to be pure of heart though, otherwise you’ll fall through it.”

“Pure of heart?” This made her pause.

“…I’m not pure of heart.”

“What makes you say that?” Goku tilted his head, squinting. “You seem plenty pure to me.”

“I…” Self-consciousness reared its ugly head. She fiddled with her hands.

“I don’t know. I just thought I was too mean of a person to be pure.”

At an early age, she became far too tired of how foolish people on Earth as a whole could be, and it’s made her into the loner she was today. She’s mouthed off to and insulted many people for just looking at her in a way she didn’t like, or for saying something stupid to her, throughout the years. People who are pure of heart don’t do that, in her opinion.

“There’s a lot of things that make someone’s heart pure, I think. I don’t know how to explain it, but I do know that just being nice to other people isn’t enough or even required. You need to have a certain mindset…a certain understanding, of the world. Of life itself.”

This felt like a lesson of some sort. Goku himself appeared to fall into deep thought over his words, but his head eventually shook as he refocused on the matter at hand.

“I think you do, _____. You just give me that feeling.”

“… … …” She couldn’t find any appropriate words to say in response.

“Instead of talking about it, let’s see if Nimbus thinks you’re pure.” He stepped to the side.

“Try getting on it.”

She didn’t have any other options. Besides, though she was confident she’d slip right through the cloud and her ass would crash onto the ground, she still wanted to see it through anyway.

The woman walked to the cloud, but at a closer proximity now, she saw that it was levitating some feet off the ground. It was too high for her to climb up onto, but luckily, she wasn’t the only one who noticed that.

“Upsy-daisy!”

Goku’s hands grabbed her hips with a gentle force, and lifted her like she weighed less than air. The feeling of it, and the sight of his bright smile made embarrassment twist her features. The exposed skin of her legs first contacted Nimbus’ wisps, and she noted how feathery-soft it felt.

The Saiyan placed her on the center of the cloud, and released his grip. With bated breath, she sat still as a statue on it, feeling the slight warmth it emitted slowly pool into her body.

Seconds passed…

… … …

…And she didn’t feel herself move at all.

“I knew it!” Goku laughed, pumping his fists. “And you said you were ‘too mean’!”

She kept her head down, bewilderment making her speechless. She pressed her hands into Nimbus’ airy fluff, and the cloud felt as solid as a firm pillow. If she was going to fall through it, she would’ve done so by now.

Frankly, she didn’t know what to make of this. Should she be…happy? This was something to be happy about, right? At the end of the day, it shouldn’t matter if some magical cloud judged her morality, but…

“Now that you can ride Nimbus, there isn’t anywhere on Earth you can’t go!” The Saiyan affectionately pat the cloud.

“Where’s the nearest dragon ball? No time like the present to get started.”

Thankful for the distraction, she shrunk the radar’s map again so Goku could see it.

“Northeast…ok! Here, you can hold onto the bag. We’ll put the dragon balls in here as we collect them.” He draped it over her shoulders, then rose into the air.

“Hold on! How do I control this thing?” She adjusted the bag’s strap and looked down at the puttering cloud.

“With your mind. Just think about where you want Nimbus to go, and it’ll go. It’s real easy!” Goku grinned down at her.

“Ok…”

‘Up, Nimbus. To the northeast, follow Goku.’

She said the command mentally, and sure enough, it moved with no delay. Not expecting the sudden motion, she froze and buried her nails in the cloud’s exterior, seeing the ground quickly growing smaller. Immediately, she was brought back to the time when she first technically flew. Though, instead of on a cloud, she was in his arms…

“There you go! Just like that.” Goku praised.

His ki flared to life, and she witnessed the Saiyan jet off. Nimbus, heeding her earlier command, went after him at a similar speed. The lack of a warning and the wind battering her face made her hunker down more into the yellow mass, desperately not wanting to fall or faint from shock.

She did crack open an eye, and saw that Goku was just ahead of her. They both were moving through the sky, with the white clouds drifting about having become blurs. Despite the high speed Nimbus was flying at, there was a surprising lack of disturbance outside of the wind ruffling her hair and clothes. The cloud stayed level, unaffected by whatever turbulence it encountered.

Curious, she peeked over Nimbus’ edge, and resisted the urge to flinch away at the sight of the far away ground moving. She had to have been miles up in the air. Having never flown in a plane or any other flying vehicle, this was an entirely new experience. It was almost dream-like.

Feeling more calm, she directed her attention back to the radar. The symbol that indicated her current location was now moving, and the dot for the dragon ball they were going after was getting closer to it. They were heading in the right direction, and this further calmed her down.

She was content to sit back and enjoy the flight. Spacing out, she thought back to the time Vegito carried her into the sky so they could watch the sunrise.

Hindsight told her that it was an…awfully romantic moment. Did Vegito intend for it to be? She wanted to think not, but judging by how intent he was and how soft he acted with her after the fact…there had to be something there. Especially because something snapped for him, and he left her alone and cold that same morning. Later when she discovered him at Capsule Corp, he told her it was because he realized whatever existed between them was changing, and he wasn’t sure if he could continue to stay at arm’s length…

He initially didn’t want to grow close to her. That didn’t offend her, as other than tolerating his presence, she had the same sentiment in the beginning. It seemed both their minds changed, after that day.

Was…it fate? Or was it nothing, that become something? Who could say. But here she was now, doing all of this for him, so he could have that chance to live the life he wanted. Whether she could be included in that life or not, remained to be seen.

She could only hope that he truly did feel the same way.

“_____!” Having been in a reverie, she missed how Goku moved to where he was flying alongside Nimbus.

“How close are we now?”

On the radar, the dot was now almost on top of her cursor. She zoomed in to get a more accurate view.

“From the looks of it, we’re within a mile of it. I think it could be down there?”

She urged Nimbus to slow down, and pointed down to a valley they were approaching.

“Let’s go down and get a better look then!”

She followed Goku’s lead. The valley was exceptionally beautiful, composed of a lush green field parted by a river with many mountains looming about. If only she brought a camera.

They slowed down to better follow the radar’s map. It begun beeping at a rapid pace when they neared a group of trees, signaling that they were virtually within feet of the dragon ball. She narrowed her eyes and scanned the scenery, though she didn’t see an orange orb anywhere.

Goku thought to search the treetops, and it proved to be the correct decision.

“Found it!” He hovered down to the ground, with the object held in his hand. The sunlight reflected off of it, highlighting its orange hue and the red stars within it.

“It’s the four-star ball too.” Goku stared fondly down at it. “My grandpa used to keep this, as a special treasure.”

“Your grandpa?”

“Yeah, Grandpa Gohan. He raised me, after I came to Earth when I was a baby.”

Vegito did mention something about that, but not in a lot of detail. She knew little about the old man, but it was clear that Goku cared a lot about him.

“Sounds like he was a nice man.”

“He was great. If he was still alive, I’m sure he would’ve loved to meet you _____.”

The reminder that a loved one was dead would’ve surely put a damper on someone’s mood, but his smile didn’t lose any of its strength. Quietly she scolded herself; Goku must’ve come to terms with his grandfather’s passing long ago. If he didn’t dwell on it, then she shouldn’t either.

It was very sweet of him to say that Gohan senior would’ve enjoyed meeting her though. Goku apparently thought so highly of her…but, considering he and Vegeta used to be joined as Vegito, should that come as a shock?

“Anyway, that’s one ball down. And in good time! If we keep it up, we can gather the rest before the day’s over.”

Goku handed the dragon ball to her, and she took the opportunity to study it. This was the first time she’s seen one of these things up close, and because of what they – or Shenron rather – was capable of, part of her was surprised that the orbs weren’t more popular than being simple legend.

But, Vegito told her why. Bulma’s dragon radars were the only devices on the entire planet that could sense them, and she was extremely strict about not revealing the blueprints on how they were made to anyone; not even her close associates at Capsule Corp. Plus, many people in different parts of the world either didn’t believe or didn’t know they existed. That was definitely for the best.

She tucked the orb into the bag, as Goku asked where the next nearest ball was. Minutes later, they were flying off into the sky again, going west.

                                                                                                             ༻ ❁ ༺

The sun was near the horizon, when they finally collected the final dragon ball. With all seven in tow, she and Goku traveled to Capsule Corp. On the way there, that anxiety she was brimming with earlier in the day returned with a greater intensity. When West City came into view, nausea made her stomach turn. She wished she had the enthusiasm Goku had.

“This’ll work _____. Don’t worry!”

One of his hands slammed her shoulder in an attempt to give a consoling pat, but because of his strength, it made her almost fall over onto the magical cloud.

“Whoops! Sorry.” Goku chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. She huffed, sliding off of the cloud and fixing the man with a half-hearted glare.

“Thanks for all your help, Nimbus.”

Goku dismissed the cloud, and it soared away, disappearing into the sky’s changing hues.

She moved to walk into the Capsule Corp building, but was stopped by the Saiyan.

“I wanted to let you know, that you can ride Nimbus whenever you want. Just shout its name, and it’ll come to you.”

“Really? Uh, thanks…” She blinked, feeling heat creep up her skin. “Why grant me that though?”

“Why not?”

Goku asked in return, beaming in a way that screamed innocence, before he made his way into the building. She was greatly flattered, and grateful for his kindness. Having access to something that could fly and required no fuel of any sort was useful, though she doubted it would be a good idea to use Nimbus to travel to work or anything like that.

When she caught up to Goku, he was speaking to Bulma near the front entrance.

“Great job. You can summon Shenron out in the back, whenever you’re ready.” The scientist addressed her when she approached. Her grip on the bag tightened. Within it, the dragon balls were flashing slowly in a rhythmic pattern, and it spurred her to get the show on the road.

“I’ll do it now. I can’t wait any longer.”

“I understand.”

Bulma nodded, and they all started down a hall to where the summoning occurred last time. The spot where the wish was made to undo the fusion…this wish would be made to bring him back together. It was poetic.

…Speaking of wishes, there was something she was honestly confused by.

“By the way. Bulma? How do you get away with summoning the dragon here, right in the city? Doesn’t it attract attention?”

“It does. But I came up with the excuse that Capsule Corp is working on developing a hologram of a dragon for a cinema project, and the public ate it up.” The bluenette shrugged her shoulders. She stared, in disbelief.

“Seriously? People believed that?”

“You’d be surprised, at how many people are easy to fool. It helps that hardly anyone alive today knows what the mythical dragon of wishes looks like. Shenron’s basically hidden in plain sight here.”

“Hm.” That was painfully convenient, but she would let it go. She heard Goku snicker, amused by her skepticism.

When they turned a corner, they were met with Trunks and Goten, who skid to a stop before them.

“Mom! …_____? Did you get the dragon balls?” The purple-haired boy asked. He and Goten held similar expressions of curiosity.

“Goku and I did, yeah.”

“Cool!” Goten grinned, and ran over to cling to his father’s trousers.

“Will we get to see Vegito again for real, Daddy?”

“We’ll have to wait and see.” He ruffled the boy’s hair.

They all resumed walking, with each of the boys chatting with their respective parent, leaving her to ruminate.

As much as she tried to fight it, fear slowly crept up from the pit of her gut. It was entirely possible that there wouldn’t be anything Shenron could do. The last time she was with him, when he told her that he would see her later, could’ve been the true last time she would ever see him again. Until she spoke her wish, she was caught in this state of unknowing. She hated it. She wanted to go forward, but at the same time, she was…terrified of what lied before her.

What if it actually didn’t work? Vegito…he was gone, for good as far as she knew. That felt so surreal, so cruel, that it couldn’t possibly be the truth. But, she’s gone through surreal, cruel events before. Perhaps this wouldn’t be any different.

She felt like throwing up, when they reached the outdoors area. On auto pilot, she took the dragon balls out of the bag and put them onto the pavement, as the others watched. Stepping back, she breathed in and out, attempting to quell the unease shaking her hands.

It’s now or never.

“Arise…Eternal Dragon.”

She spoke the command, but in a hushed tone. It worked nonetheless.

The orbs ceased their flashing and lit up simultaneously, before a massive burst of light shot from them and up into the sky, that grew darker than the nighttime that had already started to fall. Having never observed the dragon emerging from the orbs before, her worry was temporarily forgotten as awe washed over her features. The trail of light writhing and twisting around like a dancing serpent was such a stunning display.

When it ceased movement, the light dispersed, and left a green, antlered dragon floating in the sky. His glowing, stark-red eyes zoned in on her.

“You who have summoned me. I will grant you any three wishes that are within my power.”

His voice echoed, igniting the fear in her and setting her nerves aflame. With a quivering arm, she wiped away the sweat that welled on her forehead. An inferno burned, and she felt as if she would crumble into ash.

“S-Shenron.” She voluntarily raised her voice until she felt she was shouting, but even then, it sounded too quiet to her own ears. Face-to-face with the dragon like this, she felt incredibly small. Insignificant. The void within Shenron’s gaze was a grim reminder of reality itself, and she was entirely at its mercy now.

It didn’t stop her from announcing her desire, with about as much conviction as she could muster.

“I wish for Vegito to be brought back to life as his own person, separate from Goku and Vegeta, with his memories intact.”

Her words faded away into the air. There was silence.

… … …

… … …

… … …

“…Your wish is within my power.”

The breath she was unconsciously holding in, rushed out of her lungs with the force of a small gale. The blaze within her petered out. The atmosphere that befell the area dissipated, as vocalizations and expressions of relief sounded off from those behind her.

“However-”

Shenron resumed speaking, and her attention was completely re-captured.

“To essentially recreate and give a body to the Potara fusion of Goku and Vegeta will take all of my power. You will not be able to have a second or third wish granted.”

“That’s fine.”

She responded with no hesitation. It was such a meager consequence, that it was utterly dwarfed by what mattered the most here.

“Very well.”

The glow of his eyes heightened into a powerful radiance that made her draw back. She detected something intangible around herself change.

The air was shifting, and behind her, she caught the ki that had started to shine from Goku and Vegeta – the latter she just now noticed had joined them outside. The two Saiyans looked on in silent confusion, before they winced, as if they had been stricken with an unpleasant feeling. The aura stretched from their bodies and reached in streaks in front of her, before Shenron, and met to begin forming a mass of energy.

It was like the Saiyans’ essences were feeding it, as it grew larger and larger. Minutes passed, before the aura left the two and became completely integrated into the mass, as it stretched and twisted to form a humanoid shape.

Sparks danced and shot from it in a display that made her shield her face, but she took in how unmistakable features of it materialized.

Spiky hair…

Bangs…

A tail…

The chaos calmed, and in its wake stood the person who plagued her thoughts.

His expression was blank, soulless, but the spark of life immediately shot through his eyes and had him become animated. He rapidly blinked, and brought a gloved hand up to his face.

“Your wish has been granted. Farewell.”

Shenron departed, and the new figure turned to watch him fade back into the dragon balls, that flew upwards and shot into opposing directions in the brightening sky after.

He turned back to the group of people that stood before him, appearing absolutely perplexed.

“W-What…what is this…?”

Vegito’s eyes darted from Goku and Vegeta, instinctively zeroing in on them. Her heart lurched when he spoke, as he sounded different from what she remembered. There was no longer the voices of the two who made up him speaking in unison; instead there was a singular voice that struck a balance between them. He sounded ordinary.

“This woman here,” Vegeta began, gesturing towards her.

“Used the dragon balls to revive you.”

“Yeah!” Goku joined, flashing a grin full of wonder and excitement. “Welcome back Vegito!”

He stared at them, confused beyond belief, but he did turn his gaze towards her. Their eyes met, and water sprung up in her own. He maintained his shock, but seconds later, recognition flooded his stare. His face shifted in a way that made tears streak down her cheeks.

“_____...?”

He asked in sheer disbelief, and her initial response was to run towards him.

“Veggie!”

The nickname shot from her mouth without she thinking about it, and her face was buried into the fabric of his gi on his chest as her arms flew around his torso to hug him tightly.

“I missed you!”

She sobbed, though it was muffled. There was a pause, then she shivered when two muscled arms returned her embrace and pressed her more into his warmth. The tips of his fingers dug into the fabric of her shirt, and he nuzzled her head, burying his nose into her hair.

Peace she’s never known until now blanketed her mind, in that exact moment. She bathed in his presence, and got fleetingly lost in the sound of his heart beating. It grounded her, but also sent her spiraling into a trance where she felt like she was floating skyward in bliss. All of her previous fears melted away.

It took a gust of wind to bring her brain back to full focus. She wondered how the two of them appeared to everyone watching them right now, but the thrill of the moment swiftly got rid of that concern.

“It’s good to see you, Vegito.”

Bulma spoke, and while she couldn’t see her, the genuine delight in the woman’s voice was a good indicator as to how she was feeling.

“…It’s good to be back.” His breath blew past her scalp, voice taut with a mix of emotions. It made more tears fall, especially the one emotion that was stronger and more easily discernable from the rest. He sounded so happy.

“…Now…if you’ll excuse us.”

One of his arms moved to press under her rear and hoist her up, so her chin was resting on his shoulder. Sensing what was coming next, she held onto him, as he rose into the air before blasting off in a burst of speed with she nestled against him. The exhilaration of the act had her involuntarily laugh, as Capsule Corp and West City shrunk into the horizon.

He touched down in front of her house, and placed her onto her feet. She fixed her hair to get it out of her face, just as she was staggered by Vegito removing a glove from one of his hands and cupping her cheek. The callousness where smooth material would normally be had her intake a deep breath of air, as Vegito looked deeply into her eyes.

He was smiling, unrestrained. Taking in his handsome features once again, after so long, made electricity shoot down her spine and pool in her abdomen. Before she could say a single word, he leaned down and pressed his forehead to hers. His bangs curled against and stroked her skin, leaving it tingling.

In her shoes, her toes curled. Her fingers dug into his blue gi, not wanting to release it anytime soon.

It was quiet. Night had fallen, leaving the surrounding area dark and bathed in a peaceful atmosphere. Eyes closed, she relished in the feeling of being with Vegito once again. Her Saiyan.

“…So. You missed me, huh?”

She huffed, both amused and not surprised by the teasing question. Yep, this was Vegito alright.

“Yes, I did.” She was in too far of a good mood to try hiding her sentimental feelings, and not give him more ammo he would use to tease her further. He could have all the ammo he wanted, and she was put more under his spell as she felt his hand leave her cheek and travel to the back of her head, where his palm rubbed her scalp.

“How long was I out for?”

He referring to his erasure as something casual like he merely being unconscious, really pushed home the fact that he was truly here.

“Around five months in total.”

“Sheesh. That’s almost half a year.”

Vegito was being so light-hearted with this, that she wanted to cry again. She couldn’t resist allowing a few more tears to slip out, but he seemed to sense this, as his hand dropped from her head.

She opened her eyes in time to see him slightly pull away, so he could wipe her tears away with a level of delicateness she was surprised by. He regarded her with the same soft smile he had back on that special morning, but this time, nothing disrupted it. The warrior didn’t speak again, but just by what his eyes were revealing to her, she could tell that there was a lot more he wanted to say.

She wanted to say more as well. But, all of that could wait. She wanted to enjoy this peace, before just what the two of them were now was brought up for discussion. That likely will require serious consideration she was too content and tired right now to be capable of.

Vegito tugged her closer, and they embraced again. When she felt his tail come up to brush against her lower back, she had a good feeling about what was in store for them both.

[duhragonball]

Dream 9 Toriko x One Piece x Dragon Ball Z Super Collaboration Special !! (2013)

Okay, let me start with a disclaimer: I know nothing about Toriko and extremely little about One Piece.  No disrespect to One-Piece, but I didn’t like this special very much, because it’s basically crammed full of characters I don’t know, and the ones I do know don’t get a lot of screen time. 

So I wasn’t particularly excited to cover this one, and now that I’ve watched it, I can’t say it was a particularly great introduction to Toriko or One Piece.  All I really got out of this were a few good screenshots of DBZ guys. 

I’ve heard good things about One Piece, and I might check it out one of these decades, but I’ve also heard it’s over a thousand chapters long, and still going, so I might be dead of old age by the time I’m ready to try it.  And I have zero interest in Toriko at all.  For years, I kept having trouble remembering who the third guy was in this thing, and for some reason I kept thinking it was Bleach. 

So this is a good old fashioned crossover, like Superman vs. the Amazing Spider-Man.  Well, actually, all three properties are under the Toei banner, so this is more like an intra-company crossover event, like when the Avengers, Fantastic Four, and X-Men get together to do stuff.  Or Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman.  Basically, in 2013, these were Toei’s “Big Three”, and they wanted to do a cross-promotion. 

I never quite understood how DBZ got roped into this.  There had been a Toriko/One-Piece crossover before this, but this one aired the week after Battle of Gods first premiered in Japan.  So there was a coordinated effort to promote the movie along with the two TV series. 

Personally, I have trouble buying into Toriko as one of the “Big Three”.  This feels more like Superman and Batman hanging out with Captain Atom or something.  And Captain Atom is like “Hey guys!  It sure is historic that we’re all teaming up like this.  The three greatest superheroes!” And Superman and Batman have to try not to roll their eyes at him.  I’m not saying this to bash Toriko or Captain Atom, but they’re not on that level and they know it.  I feel like I’ve heard One-Piece has already surpassed Dragon Ball on a number of popularity metrics, and while I find that hard to accept, I believe it, because I hear about it all the time.  They made the theme song Krillin’s ringtone in  Resurrection F.  Every time I hear about Toriko, it’s always this special, where he teams up with two much bigger franchises.

To be fair, Toriko had a much shorter run than the other two.  The anime ended in 2014, and the manga wrapped up in 2016.  So maybe it just had a smaller pop culture impact. 

But I think it might have something to do with the author’s history as a sex offender.  In 2002, Mitsutoshi Shimabukuro was arrested and convicted for violating child prostitution laws.  He was sentenced to two years in prison, but for some reason the sentence was suspended.  So if it sounds like I’m not showing the proper respect to the Toriko franchise... this might have something to do with it. 

Okay, so this crossover is organized into two episodes.  The first part is Toriko Episode 99.  The conclusion is in One Piece Episode 590. Apparently both of these are going to get an English dub when they air on Toonami March 4.  That’s like next week, but I don’t want to wait around for that, so here we are.

Here’s the skinny: All of these characters live in the same world now, apparently.  Just run with it.  The IGO has organized a special tournament, with the winner receiving the Carat-Sized Cattle, a delicacy so tasty and precious that... I don’t know.  I saw Goku eat a cloud once, so he seems like more of a “quantity over quality” kind of guy.  The Toriko characters are all about gourmet food, so I assume this is to keep them interested.  And I think Luffy is another hungry action guy in the tradition of Goku, so that’s enough to get him involved.

Anyway, the tournament is really more of a race.  A large crowd of people enter, but early into the event...

A giant antlion or something shows up and most of the contestants get lost in the sand.  Did they die?  Who knows.  All that matters are the characters who didn’t get slowed down by this, and they continue towards the goal.

Sigh... let’s go over the characters.  The Toriko side, from left to right is: Toriko, Sunny, Rin, and Koichi Hirose from Diamond is Unbreakable I mean Komatsu.  yeah, that’s definitely what I meant to say.  We never learn jack shit about Sunny and Rin, so I won’t have much to say about them.   Komatsu is some kind of chef, and Toriko’s sidekick.

I literally just finished watching this and I couldn’t tell you anything about these characters.  Okay, let me try a little harder. 

Luffy’s the stretchy guy with the hat.  He’s the leader of the Straw Hat Pirates. 

Nami’s like the team’s resident woman.  Like, if there’s a Pirate Crime that they can’t solve because the clues involve makeup, Nami will solve it for them, because she knows all about that stuff.  Also, she wants the Carat-Sized Cattle because its bones are made out of solid diamond, and she’s into money.

Sanji has a cigarette, so that’s kind of special, I guess.

Chopper looks like a deer or something.  Maybe an antelope.  I’m pretty sure he once teamed up with NJPW star Minoru Suzuki, so I guess he’s my favorite One Piece dude.

Franky’s a cyborg?  I guess?

Slash (aka Saul Hudson) was the lead guitarist for the hard rock band Guns ‘n’ Roses. 

Zoro is green and has a sword.  So he’s like their Piccolo, I think.

Finally we have... fuck, I have no idea who these assholes are.  Was Naruto in this thing too?  Dammit, I’m gonna be writing this all day. 

So there’s multiple paths in this race, so that allows the characters to split up and get their stuff in.  See, my problem with this whole premise is that these shonen franchises have a lot in common, and teaming them up like this really just exposes this flaw.  Most of the gags in this thing boil down to “Oh, you have  a horny guy on your show?  Well here’s the horny guy on our show!”  Like, I’m pretty sure the skeleton man has a little more to him than that, but we’re never gonna find out in an hour special featuring 45 characters. 

Also Vegeta shows up late, because no one even told him about this event, and he interrupts a showdown between Zoro and... Zebra, I think his name was.  They start fighting each other, which sounds like a cool little side-thing, but this is literally all it is.  The joke is that they’re fighting off-screen through the rest of the story.  So tough luck if any of these guys were your faves. 

Oh, hey, it’s King Kai.  And he’s not dead in this, which proves that the original theatrical cut of Battle of Gods didn’t have him dead!  The DVD release has halos on him and Bubbles, and I’ve known all along that Toei was gaslighting me, so this is my favorite part of this special.  Anyway, he calls Goku about a Space Crisis, so Goku just teleports away to deal with that other, probably cooler adventure.  Okay, so two things.

First, I really find it gratifying how they put over all the DBZ guys in this.  There’s some semblance of parity between Toriko and Luffy, but Goku’s clearly shown to be on another level.  They don’t even try to hide it.  He’ll knock out a second adventure while he’s slumming this one.  Goku doesn’t give a fuck.

Second, this is really, really annoying.  Just show me the cool thing Goku’s doing in space.  This little gag is basically admitting that the show would be a lot better if all these other characters would take a hike. 

So Goku makes it back just as the race is coming to an end, and he still manages to catch up to Toriko and Luffy, so they all grab the flag together and it’s a three-way tie.  But that just means we settle it with a tiebreaker....

So the IGO guy had prepared for something like this, and the stadium transforms into a combat sports arena.  The last man in the ring wins the beef.

Also, Mr. Satan fell onto the stage during the transformation sequence, so he’s in this thing too, even though he didn’t do the race part. 

So Goku works over the other two guys pretty well.  I like this fight, but let’s not kid ourselves, much of this is Toriko and Luffy double-teaming Goku.  They might have stood a chance that way, but then they turned on each other, and that borked it up. 

Anyway, they all cut loose with their full power (except Goku who never goes past Super Saiyan 1), and they destroy the ring, so all three of them lose.  Mr. Satan wins, because he managed to stay on the small piece of the stage that wasn’t destroyed. 

But Mr. Satan is a magnanimous guy, and the Carat-Sized Cattle is enormous, so he decides to share it with all three groups. 

So I think we’re into One Piece Episode 590 now.  Everyone sits at this big-ass table and eats and talks about how great the food is.  Cripes this is boring as hell.  Is this all Toriko does all day?

Aw, look at Marron, she’s so cute.

Toriko says some BS about how eating with friends improves the dining experience. Okay, but I had an omelet from Denny’s this morning and I ate it alone and it kicked ass.  Can I just say how absolutely goofy all these characters look when they’re in the same shot? 

Then Mr. Satan says the exact same thing Toriko did about the power of sharing or whatever.  Cripes this show is so damned redundant.  We have like eight guys in orange-red clothes, and four sex pests and this is just dumb. 

So then Piccolo and... two other people, confront the guy who organized the tournament, and they ask what the real purpose is to all of this.  He admits that it was all a plot to get a bunch of strong guys together to capture the Akami, a dangerous sea creature. 

I think the idea is that the Carat-Sized Cattle is so delicious that it lured the Akami up to the surface, where it then begins attacking all the superheroes.  Each time the Akami nabs somebody with its tentacles, it absorbs all their power and transforms.  Is this supposed to be a Toriko deal or a One-Piece deal?   Who cares?

So the gang splits up to find it, because the need to capture it in thirty minutes to cure its victims.  Unfortunately, it just gets stronger every time it nabs another one, and it even absorbs energy from attacks, so fighting it is pointless.

Toriko reasons that they’d have to hit it with a lot of energy all at once, so Goku proposes using the Spirit bomb, except that doesn’t work either, because the Akami sucks up the energy faster than Goku can gather it. 

So Goku asks everyone on the island to send him more energy, which... I don’t see how that changes the problem, but whatever.  The bigger issue I have is that we see a lot of characters sending energy even after they got drained by the Akami.  So what are they sending, exactly?

So Goku launches the Spirit Bomb, but the Akami manages to hold it off, so Toriko and Luffy hit it from the sides while Goku goes SSJ3 and fires a Kamehameha at the Spirit Bomb to force it down the Akami’s throat.  So that’s  a cool variation on the Spirit Bomb.  Nice touch. 

And that takes care of the Akami. 

So then they eat the Akami for dinner, because apparently it has legendarily tasty meat as well.  So wait... they had Carat-Sized Cattle and Akami on the same day.  Wouldn’t regular food just taste like poop after this?  Maybe I’m not supposed to overthink this gimmick.

Then we get these really long pans across still images, as the voice actors read their lines.  It’s really, really weak, and there’s like four of these in a row.  Is this standard for One Piece?   It just seems really cheap, especially for a big “event” episode like this one.  Maybe they blew all their budget on that SSJ3 Kamehameha. 

Also, they just show the same footage of Vegeta fighting those other guys, so that’s another corner cut.  I mean, damn.  I’m just gonna re-use the screenshot I took from the first half in protest. 

And that’s it.  I kind of hope they never do one of these again.  Also, Mitsutoshi Shimabukuro belongs in jail. 

[thevindicativevordan]

Comics this week?

World’s Finest #21 - Another good issue, did not see the Gog reveal coming. I have not read his JSA appearance so having everyone bow down before him on Earth 22 was a shock. How long has he been running the show there? There’s a big risk here because Waid has said while Supes and Bats can’t change what is to come, they are going to have an impact. My fear is that Waid is going to retcon all of KC to have been Gog’s influence which I am not a fan of. My hope is that the impact is Clark and Bruce will either manage to get through somewhat to Magog, which is why he surrenders so easily after Kansas gets nuked in KC or we will see Clark and Bruce be the reason that some of the heroes survived the nuke at the end of KC. Amused me that Waid got to kill Ma and Pa on one Earth at least, I’d like to know if they died before or after Clark became Superman.

JLvGvK #2 - A step up from the first issue in that there was more monster fighting this time. Shazam is a total dumbass here, no Wisdom of Solomon for this guy. That ending page of course is all over the Internet and it helped clarify something for me. People bitch about Superman being “OP” but they don’t actually care about that. When he wins a fight they call him boring, but when he loses a fight? They laugh and say he sucks, and that X could have won that (X being Goku or Batman or whoever). What people are actually obsessing over is the idea that Supes is stronger than their faves and could beat them in a fight. Hence why they always bitch when Supes wins and always crow when Supes loses. It’s something DC has never realized, pandering to these people by nerfing Supes or having him lose never works because they just hate him period and will never switch to supporting him.

Superman #8 - Nice that Conner gets some good moments here. With how Lex heavy the run has been it’s past time he got to interact with the Luthor family more. Still hoping for a Conner/Lena scene what with them both being Lex’s “creations”. Not sure about the Chained, there’s some potential here but honestly he feels like a better foe for Conner than Clark.

Nightwing #108 - I’m bored and dropping the book. Without Redondo around the mediocrity of the writing is not something I can overlook anymore.

GL: WJ #3 - Adored that scene with John and his mother. Stewart is usually stoic so it’s nice to see him be emotionally vulnerable about his mom’s condition and how he has to leave her. Another nice detail: everyone hyping Stewart up. Reminiscent of Frodo and Galadriel in LOTR, if Stewart doesn’t find a way to save the day no one will. John has always struggled to step out of another person’s shadow, usually Hal, but it’s an interesting twist on the formula to make the person he has to live up to be himself. Another John Stewart became his universe’s greatest hero - can our John match his feats? Because he has to in order to win.

Wonder Woman #3 - A fakeout or the reveal of Lizzie’s biological mother? Leaning towards fakeout or at least it being more complicated than Diana simply adopting Emelie’s kid. Jon and Damian are biological kids, and Lizzie is supposed to “complete” that Trinity. Face facts: bio kids get valued more by both DC and the world at large, it’s why Jon has persisted despite being a disaster while Chris was erased, why Damian has risen in prominence while Tim has withered. A theory: Emelie’s daughter dies/is stillborn, but Diana sculpts clay and reincarnates the baby’s soul into Lizzie, just like her own mother did. Maybe she adds her blood to the process too for magical reasons, meaning Lizzie is of Diana’s blood. Or it’s all a giant fake out, we’re only three issues in after all.

Incredible Hulk #6 - My favorite transformation sequence outside of Immortal Hulk is here. PKJ said he viewed his Hulk as the Green Scar/Worldbreaker Hulk, but I feel like the Guilt Hulk is a better fit. He hates Bruce and wants him dead, torments Bruce mercilessly, and is out to punish Bruce for his sins. Like how Ewing revamped the nature of Devil Hulk while still maintaining how protective Devil was of Bruce and how he wanted to destroy the world, Guilt Hulk feels like a better fit here for what PKJ is doing.

[the-wookong]

Anime (1963 - 1973)

Astro Boy 鉄腕アトム Eight Man エイトマン Galactic Boy Team 銀河少年隊 Gigantor 鉄人28号 Hermit Village 仙人部落 Locus 軌跡 Man and Woman and Dog 男と女と犬 Time 時間 White Elephant しろいぞう Wolf Boy Ken 狼少年肯 Aos アオス Big X ビッグX Hyokkori Gourd IslandKiss Kiss Kiss Maruai 丸愛 Memory めもりい Mermaid 人魚 Renown レナウン Zero-sen Hayato 0戦はやと cosmic boy soran 宇宙少年ソラン Dolphin Prince ドルフィン王子 Fight! Osper 戦え! オスパー Hustle Punch ハッスルパンチ Kachi Kachi Yama かちかち山 Kenken Goku Fuufu Teikin 堅々獄夫婦庭訓 Kimba the White Lion ジャングル大帝 M.S. Chanda チャンダ号 new treasure island 新宝島 Pride the Master Thief 怪盗プライド Prince Planet 遊星少年パピイ Q-Taro The Ghost オバケ���Q太郎 Space Ace 宇宙エース Space Alien Pipi 宇宙人ピピ Space Patrol Hopper 宇宙パトロールホッパ The man next door 隣の野郎 Tobacco and Ashes たばこと灰 Wonder Three W3 [ワンダースリー] Au Fou! 殺人狂時代 Cyborg 009 サイボーグ009 Harris' Whirlwind ハリスの旋風 Jump Out! Batchiri とびだせ! バッチリ Kaiju Booska (opening) 快獣ブースカ Leo the Lion ジャングル大帝 進めレオ! Marine Boy がんばれ! マリンキッド Monoshiri University-Tomorrow's Calendar Osomatsu-kun おそ松くん Pictures at an Exhibition 展覧会の絵 pirate prince 海賊王子 Planetary Mask 遊星仮面 Rainbow Squadron Robin レインボー戦隊ロビン Robotan ロボタン Sally the Witch 魔法使いサリー Tsuiseki 追跡 adventure boy shadar 冒険少年シャダー Comet san コメットさん Donkikko ドンキッコ Fantasy City 幻影都市 Goku's Great Adventures 悟空の大冒険 Golden Bat 黄金バット Heidi- Girl of the Alps Pilot Hey, I'm Guzura! ective Stories 佐武と市 捕物控 sasuke サスケ Shadow かげ Star of the Giants 巨人の星 Sunset Ringleader 夕やけ番長 Vampire バンパイヤ A Shining Example of a Bully 男一匹ガキ大将 A Thousand and One Nights 千夜一夜物語 Akko's Secret ひみつのアッコちゃん Attack No.1 アタックNo.1 Dororo どろろと百鬼丸 Flying Phantom Ship 空飛ぶゆうれい船 Furious Ataro もーれつア太郎 Judo Boy 紅三四郎 Kamui the Ninja 忍風カムイ外伝 Lupin III - Pilot Film ルパン三世 Marine Boy 海底少年マリン Moomin ムーミン plum star denka ウメ星デンカ Sazae-san サザエさん Star of the Giants vs. Mighty Atom 巨人の星対鉄腕アトム Tiger Mask タイガーマスク Animal Village Stories 動物村ものがたり Cleopatra クレオパトラ Goro the Terrible ばくはつ五郎 Hikoichi's Wits 彦一とんちばなし Honeybee Hutch 昆虫物語みなしごハッチ Kicking Demon キックの鬼 Mako the Mermaid 魔法のマコちゃん Misuke in The Land of Ice 氷の国のミースケ New York Trip ニューヨーク・トリップ Norakuro のらくろ shameless highschool opening ハレンチ学園 The Bathroom ザ・バスルーム The Creation 新・天地創造 the flower and the mole 花ともぐら THE FUNNY JUDO CHAMPION いなかっぺ大将 The Gentle Lion やさしいライオン The Great Adventures of Love 恋の大冒険 The Red-Blooded Eleven 赤き血のイレブン Tomorrow's Joe あしたのジョー You Fool Koushien! 男どアホウ! 甲子園 Animal Treasure Island どうぶつ宝島 Animentary The Decision アニメンタリー・決断 Apache Baseball Team アパッチ野球軍 Attack No.1 Movie 4 アタックNo.1 涙の不死鳥 Chikotan チコタン ぼくのおよめさん Commercial War Commercial War December Song 12月のうた Demon Love Song 鬼恋歌 Genius Bakabon 天才バカボン Golgo 13 ゴルゴ13セレクション Good-by Marilyn サョナラ太郎 てんまのとらやん The Extravagant Muchabei 珍豪ムチャ兵衛 wandering sun さすらいの太陽 Zoom the White Dolphin イルカと少年 Astroganger アストロガンガー Chappy the witch 魔法使いチャッピー Chief Joker ハゼドン Devilman デビルマン Gatchaman 科学忍者隊ガッチャマン GO GET THEM 0011 魔犬ライナー００１１変身せよ Head Spoon ヘッド・スプーン Little Samurai 赤胴鈴之助 Mazinger Z マジンガーZ Moonlight Mask 正義を愛する者、月光仮面 My Dear Coco モンシェリCOCO New Moomin ムーミン Panda! Go Panda! パンダコパンダ Piggyback Ghost おんぶおばけ Return of Pero ながぐつ三銃士 Road to munich ミュンヘンへの道 Star and Rainbow 星と虹と Tamagon the Counselor かいけつタマゴン The demon 鬼 The Gutsy Frog ど根性ガエル The King and the Nightingale 王様とナイチンゲール The Midnight Parasites 寄生虫の一夜 Triton of the Sea 海のトリトン Yuki's Sun ユキの太陽 Adventures of Korobokkuru 冒険コロボックル Adventures on Rainbow Pond けろっこデメタン Aim for the Ace! エースをねらえ! Babel II バビル２世 Belladonna of Sadness 哀しみのベラドンナ Conte No. 55's why is that コント55号のなんでそうなるの cutie honey キューティーハニー Doraemon ドラえもん Dororon Enma-kun ドロロンえん魔くん Jungle Kurobee ジャングル黒べえ Karate Master 空手バカ一代 Little Wansa ワンサくん Mazinger-Z Vs. Devilman マジンガーZ対デビルマン Microid S ミクロイドＳ Miracle Girl Limit-chan ミラクル少女リミットちゃん Neo Human Casshan 新造人間キャシャーン Oh Yoko! オー・ヨーコ! Panda! Go, Panda! The Rainy-Day Circus Samurai Giants 侍ジャイアンツ The history of helping each other The Panda's Great Adventure パンダの大冒険 travel 旅 Willie Boy 荒野の少年イサム Wonderland ふしぎないど Zero Tester 0[ゼロ]テスター