#god this is a dangerous topic
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[ “SOMEBODY TOLD ME”]:
BREAKING MY BACK JUST TO KNOW YOUR NAME. SEVENTEEN TRACKS AND I’VE HAD IT WITH THIS GAME. A BREAKIN’ MY BACK JUST TO KNOW YOUR NAME—BUT HEAVEN AIN’T CLOSE IN A PLACE LIKE THIS.
— The Killers, Hot Fuss (2004)
Princess Rhaenyra’s insolence is wearing her stepmother’s patience thin. Queen Alicent is not ten years her senior, but even during her own sixteenth year, she cannot recall herself behaving so brazenly. She would never burst into courtly discussions in nothing but gilded armor and the underskirts of her riding leathers, awash in blood. (She would never be spotted in blood that was not her own, anyway. Alicent has never picked up a sword, not one that belonged to her.) Nevermind that Rhaenyra is attending to diplomatic affairs with bared teeth and scales, no—the crux of the matter is just that, her affairs. Rhaenyra is the Realm’s Delight, a beauty incomparable to any fair maiden, Alicent included. She indulges herself with appetite of a spoiled child, the confidence of man, and the pickings befitting only to her royal blood. Criston Cole. Daemon Targaryen. Harwin Strong. Laena Velaryon. She’s full of love, isn’t she? That selfish, foolish girl. What does Rhaenyra Targaryen know of love, of duty? She is a child in so many ways—she thinks killing makes her a man, thinks the throne is hers despite being a woman, thinks she can have her knight and her uncle and her protector and Laena Velaryon in one fail swoop. She’s wrong. She doesn’t know herself half as well as Alicent does. Alicent, who sees her for what she truly is, who wants to see all of her and more of her and none of her. Alicent has been stolen into the Keep by her own father—both of their fathers—but Rhaenyra is the key to this place, is the window to everything barred. Rhaenyra Targaryen has a dragon. Rhaenyra can fly.
That’s what Rhaenyra had promised her once, with her lips pulled back in a grin, exposing the white of her teeth like the violently radiant creature she was. “Perhaps when you grow tired of plotting against me, we shall ride on dragonback together,” she had said. The tease.
Alicent had yanked her into an empty corridor by the silk of her sleeve, ready to chastise her for her ill behavior. Conversing with the lords and ladies of the court at a feast was one thing, but chattering about her bloody encounters in battle over the pudding tureen were another. The lord at her elbow was going green. Alicent’s own face was likely red; her heart raced whenever Rhaenyra got like this. Alicent had never seen the battlefield—only seen battered men in dented armor and the slumps of corpses lined along dirt roads in the aftermath of war—but her own imagination terrified her like nothing else.
(Rhaenyra is better with a sword than half of the knights in Westeros, and more lovely than the lot. Her reign has not yet begun, but already the commoners flock to her—lured in by tales of her beauty and fine hair—and soldiers would follow her into battle. Alicent would not follow, but she would watch and bite her nails down to the quick.
She thinks of the figure Rhaenyra cuts in full armor, the heat in her gaze underneath the slots of her helmet. Alicent remembers the weight of her own hand in Rhaenyra’s—which was gloved—when the princess rode up to the spectators box and grasped it in her own, bringing Alicent’s knuckles to her lips. She thinks of Rhaenyra murdered in the sky, skewered with another man’s sword, plummeting to the ground, torn in half, streaking crimson across the clouds. Alicent would scream, or cry. She might laugh. She would throw herself from the window of her tower. Rhaenyra’s bloody exploits terrified Alicent for reasons she could not identify, and excited her for reasons she refused to.)
“I’d sooner be confined to the castle for the rest of my days than get on the back of that bloody lizard,” Alicent scoffed. Rhaenyra only tucked her hand over Alicent’s, where it was resting on her forearm. She flexed her fingers, moving to release her grip on the dark fabric, but Rhaenyra intertwined their fingers and held them fast.
“You’re confined already. You are already accustomed to such a thing. I know you. But—”
“But you forget yourself. You think you’re invulnerable, Rhaenyra. You don’t know who you are.” Alicent intends for it to be a sneer, but instead it comes out quietly, and too gentle for disdain. She can’t know. Rhaenyra is as trapped as she is, but they’re trapped together. They belong together. She belongs with Alicent.
“I am Rhaenyra Targaryen, Heir to the Iron Throne and all of Westeros. I am a dragonrider. I am—I am your daughter. In a way. Your sister, too. Your enemy. Your sword, your shield.”
“And what am I?” What else is left for me? Alicent wonders.
“My Queen. For now.” Rhaenyra cocks her head, and the gleam in her eyes burns like fire raining down. “When I am Queen, you will be my lady.”
#rhaenicent#rhaenyra targaryen#alicent hightower#house of the dragon#hotd#rhaenyra x alicent#my art#a book show fusion where alicent is the wicked resentful older stepmother first and foremost but even so she and rhaenyra have a connection#burdened by envy and fixation and reluctant affection. in this universe rhaenyra is given more liberties and trains as a knight would#is given a sword and flies into battle frequently and wears extravagant clothes which endears her to the small folk and makes her a hot#topic amongst royalty for her strangeness and charisma. alicent is expression not only of her freedom and expression#but of the company she keeps. rhaenyra has so many lovers and so many who are willing to follow her and it’s just not fair ok. alicent#and rhaenyra understand each other and know each others misery like no other. those other flings and beloved friends are going to get#her killed w how much they indulge her and encourage her dangerous habits and alicent may be in a cage but she won’t live in it alone. with#out her stepdaughter to torment and be tormented by (she represses the urges rhaenyra inspires bc she is devout to the faith) then there is#no meaning to suffering. god she’s in love w her. she hates her so much she wants to be her she wants to be with her she needs to touch her#she need rhaenyra to stop looking at other people bc it’s killing alicent by the day
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casey's story breaks my heart. im reading your post about amatriaín and jorge now as well and i just........ these were only kids :( this isn't to assume that all parents/caregivers/people in their lives are negligent and/or abusive but i always wonder who is protecting child/teen/younger adult riders and drivers esp when they are in the highest levels of their sport at such a young age. it seems like, especially in years gone past, there was just so much scope for these kids to be abused. although i remember a couple years ago that clip of a young rider getting hit by mechanics so that kind of stuff isn't even in the past rly.
yeah not much to say really, I mean honestly it's... I'm not going to say every guardian of a professional athlete is abusive because that'd be a crazy thing to say, but I would say that the process that makes these kids so good at what they are does also in many, many cases not reflect particularly well on the parents. tbh a lot of the safeguarding has to be taken more seriously way before these kids even get to a grand prix paddock, but that also isn't easy to do... I can only speak to my own experiences, but as someone who spent a lot of my teenage years hanging around tennis clubs, it is pretty horrifying how normalised parental abuse is in sports circles. it's just something you see all the time - and this is obviously still only the public stuff, the gossip you hear, where you can read between the lines. though honestly, a lot of the times you really don't need to be reading much between the lines. the most extreme example was when a father of a kid I trained with went so far he had the cops called on him when they were at a tournament, but again. obviously this is only the extreme. even a lot of the public abuse is tacitly accepted, and there's a lot of parental behaviour that might not qualify for the 'abusive' label but sure isn't in line with what I view as acceptable. and that's just the parents - you essentially get a lot of cases of them outsourcing this stuff to the coaches, who often get a carte blanche to do with their kids what they please. obviously I'm only familiar with this stuff personally on the juniors circuit, but unhealthy coaching relationships is also a recurring and troubling talking point on the pro circuit. especially in women's tennis you get some pretty horrifying stories. the whole thing just feels pretty rotten
ideally what you've got to do to at least TRY and stamp this stuff out is having a zero tolerance policy - whether it's in clubs or in paddocks. a system of consequences in place where physical or verbal abuse comes with repercussions... I know the risk is you just take this stuff behind closed doors, but to me the starting point problem is that it's also the culture of juniors sports - where if anything treating your kid like absolute shit is almost celebrated at times. you have to make this stuff more shameful. I have no clue to what extent motorcycling juniors clubs look like what I was accustomed to, but in all honesty I reckon you'd see a lot of the same behaviour from parents/mentors - and that at least you've got to address. but obviously that doesn't just like. fix the problem. with someone like jorge, you very obviously did need someone else to step in... but if you don't have very visible, obvious abuse, then how do you enforce that? talent spotters like amatriain have immense power within the system - jorge's father was practically begging this bloke to take jorge on, jorge wouldn't have thanked you for getting rid of him until towards the very end of their partnership, he very likely wouldn't have the career he did without the guy. and it's one of those jobs that (like sports parent) tends to attract the exact type of person you really don't want to give power over kids. again, I'm not saying they're all like that, I wouldn't know, but so many of these managers just have so many stories that raise an eyebrow... even when it's not actively related to how they're treating children, but the fact that so many of them have a history of being aggressive to reporters? the thing is, if they're being awful to these kids in all likelihood we'll never hear about it - but reporters are obviously way more likely to tell people about it. which means that every time I read one of those stories, my main takeaway is that these managers are blokes who will get aggressive when things don't go their way. also not ideal
and below that is a layer that becomes increasingly impossible to even begin to address. I mean, look at casey. I have no reason to accuse his parents of being abusive towards him. I'm not trying to make it sound like I think they're horrible people. and I do think we do always need to be clear here - like yes, I'm talking about a general concern I have here about the relationship between mentor figures and the kids in their care, but obviously that covers a very wide variety of sins. I am not drawing any equivalences between them. there's 'being a bad mentor' and then there's 'having a restraining order filed against you'. so with that massive caveat in place... I agree with you, anon, that I also feel sad about casey's story, and yeah, it makes me uncomfortable
casey does think his parents pushed their dream onto him and ensured that his future would always lie in motorcycle racing... which, I mean. god. if you read him saying it was always his parents' dream side-by-side with him saying they always put pressure on him to work for his dream, then it's just one of those parental dynamics that read as achingly familiar - kids who have been convinced they're doing this for themselves and are then made to feel guilty when they're not living up to their parents' standards. we've sacrificed everything for you, right, you need to make it worth it... casey was told that this was his dream, and the stakes for success and failure were horrifyingly high. he had his entire family's livelihood on his shoulders from age fourteen... his family invested everything into him, told him it was all for his sake- and ensured that he would feel like he was letting them down every time he didn't perform. by some miracle, he had the talent to make it through the system, but think about how precarious his journey was despite being perhaps the most talented motorcycle racer in the history of the sport. how many turning points in his career easily could have gone the other way. for every casey, there are so many more kids who won't make it, and will somehow have to live with the consequences of that failure. and these dynamics... again, I'm not going to label them outright abusive, but think about the kind of stress they place on the parental relationship. idk. it might be a reality of professional sports... parents do often have to sacrifice a lot for their children's career - and given how early kids need to start out to succeed these days, inevitably quite a bit of that desire and drive will come from the parents. but it isn't a reality that sits comfortably with me
so, what do you do about any of this? well, again, I do think you need to do the bare minimum and not tolerate clearly abusive behaviour in sporting environments. which feels like stating the obvious, but this is a low bar that often just isn't being cleared. and yeah - that recent example within the motogp paddock of a rider being assaulted by a team member... definitely not going to be a one-off. just feels inevitable that this will be happening behind closed doors, especially when you get to the lower rungs where the competitors have less power and are less likely to be willing to risk anything (+ are also generally younger)
there's other safeguarding measures you could put in place, but it probably won't happen because people just don't care enough. first off, you need a riders' union - an organisation that's there solely to listen to riders' problems and act on them, advocate on their behalf etc. a big reason why young riders simply are not going to report any abuse is that this will almost certainly cost them professionally. you are essentially asking them to cut off their already limited support network, often the people providing them direct financial support or even employing them. if you cannot build up trust by having the mechanisms in place to take action against the abusive party (through cooperation with the series organisers), as well as provide support to the rider, then the reality is that basically none of them would ever come forward. secondly, you simply need stronger regulation of the career ladder. there's too many of these big name talent spotters who just coast through the paddock by having accumulated influence over the years, with zero reason to believe they have their charges' best interests at heart... often former riders themselves, but that's not exactly a pedagogical qualification. look, it's tricky to regulate because the exact roles these blokes play in riders' lives is so malleable and comes associated with all kinds of job titles - maybe you're a rider coach or manager or team boss or something else entirely. but ideally you want a system where certain privileges - like even entry to certain areas of the paddock - has to come along with accepting a certain level of regulatory oversight. make these blokes directly accountable and force them to uphold a professional code, in line with what you'd expect of any other professional who hold power over a vulnerable population. make it clear to them that they're being watched. I also don't think it's crazy to suggest that if you let minors race in a grand prix paddock, you should have some sort of system in place where the series organisers directly and regularly check in with the minors in their care. there will be a lot of behaviour that children do not themselves see as abusive - obviously it's very plausible that they just won't tell you the truth, but you have to start somewhere. motorcycle racing does actually have an advantage over many other individual sports in how centralised it is, how everyone is constantly going to the same location. they would have the power to enforce some of these standards
thirdly, and this is even less likely than the others to gain any traction. ... man, you've got to make sure these kids have options. this is becoming worse and worse the more professionalised sports become, the more they all chase their youthful prodigies... but, y'know, think about how early so many of these children drop out of school, how it's increasingly unlikely they've had the time to foster any sort of other interest (another theme of casey's account, "I don’t know if I was allowed to have any other attraction"). how motorcycle racing is the only thing they've ever known, how it's their whole world. you're raising a group of young people to whom leaving that world would basically feel like dying. it makes the stakes of everything so enormous, it twists these parental relationships, and it also ensures that certain figures have so, so much power over these kids. obviously nobody is forcing them at gunpoint to race - but in reality, it feels like they don't even have the option of walking away. again, this is obviously a massive problem to address that no sport has entirely sorted out, and the series organisers can rightly say it's not their responsibility to make kids go to school. honestly, my first step would be to just... do something about these age limits. they're too low! too many of these kids are too young for grand prix racing! a starting point is to try and make it so that kids aren't being actively penalised for attempting to pursue an education. this feels another area where you'd really want to have an actual union - even to just have someone to talk to. and again, as long as the series organisers let children race, then I do think it's actually also some of their responsibility to look out for them. realistically, a lot of these kids don't actually want to walk away from racing - however you get to that point, it is also very much their dream. but anything you can do to lessen the influence of the worst people in their lives, anything you can do to at least remind them they can walk away... idk. it's the right thing to do. especially for the kids who aren't succeeding, help them on their way out
now look, this isn't a detailed manifesto. I do know that some other sports have implemented similar-ish measures to the ones above but I couldn't give you a breakdown without some research. I'm not an expert on preventative measures for child abuse, and I'm sure some of these could come with unintended consequences I'm unaware of. I also know all of these things range from 'desperately unlikely' to 'never going to happen'. and even if you did, it's really only taking a pickaxe to the tip of the iceberg. or something. to reiterate what I said at the top, I don't want to make it sound like I think all parents of athletes are abusive. I also don't think the mentors are either. I do think a lot of them are... and even beyond that - the way sports is structured, the way the ladder to professional sports is structured, you are going to see a lot of unhealthy dynamics involving very young people in vulnerable positions. and I don't think that's in any way easy to address... but y'know. sometimes it'd be nice if somebody were at least trying. the sport is doing less than the bare minimum. and for every story we hear, there's going to be so so many more where we'll remain entirely ignorant
#again this isn't like. a completely thought out response#it is a general topic i have thought about a fair bit but mostly in the context of a completely different sport#but to some extent it's frustrating because i feel like with how insular and centralised motogp is... it should be easier to do SOMETHING#it's also a culture thing like... all these old men with their massive egos and too much power. playing god with young boys' lives#there is also something particularly gross about it in this sport because of how *dangerous* it is#i enjoy moto3 as a category but honestly i never feel *great* watching it. just very uncomfortable#in a way you'll never be completely able to fix unless you ban motorcycle racing but... man these kids need people looking out for them#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#cw child abuse
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not to bring up mass effect but that’s one of the most interesting things it ever posited when it came to the idea of organic vs artificial intelligence. a machine, if sentient, knows who created it and why it was created. and a person will never know that. like, even lacking spirituality, even if you ascribe all this to random cause-and-effect, that doesn’t actually get you any closer to understanding why there is a you. but a robot can look their creator in the eye, can read out the whole of its purpose, and know that no matter what it modifies, this is what it was made to be. and what if it was made limited, or flawed, or shackled. there are elements of that a person can relate to, maybe understand, but not all of it, not enough to fathom how different the experience of the world is when you have no questions about your origins.
#also not to talk about mass effect but this is whyyy i love the geth so much. it feels like this would be something you could easily take#in a cold and logical direction because of this whole. lack of questions.#but the geth are so brimming with this sort of. faith. you know? its written into every way they’re referred to. they call the reapers the#old gods. older. we must assume. referring not just to them but to the quarians.#they call splinters of their hivemind that disagree ‘heretics’. legion accepts that name specifically because of its implications.#for a whole game the geth are mindless enemies and then suddenly they’re a *people*. and legion takes the name of a biblical demon.#we’re getting off topic here but its mass effect let me ramble. AI are banned because this fundamental difference in worldview makes them#unpredictable to organic life. makes them dangerous. legion accepts the name of a demon. accepts what the geth are seen as and what they are#and still asks. if they have a soul. they were not made with one in mind. they know this. they know they were not created to have one.#the point of the question isn’t. objectively. do they? the point is. do you consider them to. will you treat them as if they do.#because the flipside of all of this is that you know a robot’s origins too. you know their purpose. so. could you treat something made#this way as if it has a soul.#you know? sorry im getting very pretentious here. i miss mass effect 2 and my littke guys
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It’s kinda crazy that the events at the last few episodes of FHSY were glossed over (this is a very badly written ramble about how The Bad Kids are probably incredibly traumatised after sophomore year and it isn’t addressed much, or kind of at all)
—
Thinking about how The Bad Kids walked into the Forest of The Nightmare King after weeks of travelling, the constant threat that came with sleeping, being vulnerable in foreign lands and people, and that one of their best friends was kidnapped and only just retrieved with her months-of-tortured and previously evil sister a day or two ago.
And then they get to a skeleton-scattered temple of a forgotten god, their friend is violently murdered by a unicorn in front of their eyes, they do a whole bunch of drugs and after, on top of all of that, are tortured by their worst fears come to life?
Then The Bad Kids go on to face a colossal king— no, a god, AFTER having to shake off and give into their deepest fears with their war torn friends and family by their side, all for a school project worth 60% of their grade.
If Kristen Applebees had not hit that Nat 20 (tbf it had to have happened exactly that way but still), the fight would have spun out a very different way
The finale of FHSY fails narratively to address just the insane amount of emotional, mental and physical torture these children went through and because of the amount of real life time between seasons sophomore and junior year, I think we skipped over addressing that these kids are probably very traumatised
#just a badly written ramble about#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#dimension 20#I just think it’s crazy how in FHJY they go right back to this crazy adventure and then are piled in school work#and also they are forced to fight another corrupted and dangerous god#they’re literal children it’s crazy to think about#this is my third rewatch of all of fantasy high#I might just be going insane please ignore me#honestly I could talk about this topic forever#d20 analysis#plu’s d20 rambles
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if I had a dollar for every time I saw this used as justification for why actually! it's totally cool that the trio have already known the gimmick of every single obstacle they run into, in a way that conveniently allows them to avoid every point of real conflict or stakes or potential action in this action adventure series!! i would have enough money to pay the cgi department to animate riptide's transformation
#annabeth is not a fucking idiot either and she knows the myths in the books and she still gets trapped by things!!#cause first and foremost going into every conflict of every episode wanting to see your protags slowly realize the danger#only for them to just be like. yeah so we know this is a trap right. yeah don't get caught right. that's fucking boring sorry#they did not do that in the books because it's fucking boring to watch#also they're 12. “they read the myths and they're not idiots!!” I also read the myths and was not an idiot#and I would still get caught by these damn traps omfg😭😭😭 they're TWELVE!! WITH ADHD#MAKE THEM FEEL LIKE 12 YEAR OLDS WITH POOR IMPULSE CONTROL PLEASE. SO MANY OF THE TRAPS REQUIRE IMPULSE CONTROL TO BEAT#I would've been like oh my god waterbeds!!! oh my god a free casino with video games!! AND THEY DO THAT IN THE BOOKS. THEY ALL DO THAT.#NOT JUST PERCY. ALL OF THEM#not even addressing that this is post is probably also about him recognizing that it's kronos let's not talk about that I'm not doing that#also. percy is smart but it's not in the way they're doing it in the show alright but like. topic for another day#pjo#pjo tv show#pjo disney+
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Me making a HSR verse for my oc: Hmmm so the plan on this one could maybe be a bad end for her tendency to fuck around and find out—
My brain: So anyways, make her whole deal a fucken horror story-
#Oceanxveiined#//Thas her blog#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//I mean it’s not THAT much of a horror thing anyways. Bordering on body horror ig (warning for that now jic)#//It’s basically ‘in her search for power to rival Aeons; she may or may not have gotten parasitized by monster maws essentially’#//Basically Me.nagerie from Arr0wverse ig? but x4; so ig it’s more like Scy||a from myths?#//Yeah#//Basically it’s 4 serpentine creature things that merged into her body at the lower back& can burst out when they feel like it/in battle#//The way I can best visualize what they look like is like. a combo of the Hydra heads from Hercu/es 1997#//And Ven0m when it pokes its head out of Edd|e lol. Smth like a mix of the two#//But yeah#//She gets so fucked up in every narrative she take part in lol#//Selling soul to a demon for power and slowly gets corrupted against her will by said demon bc they got attached? Yup#//Slowly succumbing to abyss influence and might might a fate like/worse than Jakob or the Sinners of Khaenri’ah? Yup yup#//Made a deal with a death god to save her brother& considering her heritage; it might mean eternal torment to counteract stealing a soul#back; all bc she’d been too desperate to get him back that she didn’t come up with a more clever plan? EYUP#//Those are her Descendants/fantasy verse; Genshin; and pjo verses respectively#//And then her bnha au; in which she keeps overusing her Quirk; esp with certain Quirk drug usage; to dangerous extents#//But y e a h#//Its fun#//I love my darling Dani so much#//Byt yeah; back on topic; that ain’t TOO much tho lol right?#//Eh; why not#//The galaxy is FULL of horrors#//I mean did you SEE the sin thirsters and Borisin plotlines??? or the Propagation???? B r u h
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Sometimes things bother me
#and i 100% dont say them out loud on the internet cause i dont wanna get crucified#but people distilling shit around chillchuck to just being “shotacon” pisses me off for reasons i know they dont intend#like i relate to chillchuck because im a disabled person#specifically a wheelchair user#ryoko kui did a perspective study of the party from chilchuck's perspective#and of where his eyeline is at on everyone's body#and i haven't felt more seen by anything in a long fucking time#like god chilchuck would understand how fucking awful it feels to be crammed in an elevator right at stomach and crotch height with everyone#and more than just that gut personal relation#half-foots like disabled people live shorter lives and its not clear if thats natural#or if its because they're seen as disposable#and the infantalization is so fucking textbook ableism#like yall thats a whole ass man#next people are gonna be saying its not okay to ship mithrun because he needs a carer#this is what people mean when they say shipping rots people's brains#it goes both ways#and it makes it impossible to really explore the complex topic of relationships in fiction#the portrayal of those relationships and how they interplay with the wider story#and you just flatten everything to Ship Good and Ship Bad or Shippable and Not Shippable#it makes it impossible to talk about actual problems in fan communities and point out actual dangerous behavior#because everyone's pointing fingers over shit without having proper discussions#and talking about characters like the#they're real people#while ignoring the things real people do do other real people#because they're treating people like characters#chilchuck is a blurry fucking line and because of that the devil is in the details#twitter ruined the internet with it's character limit by eliminating nuance#and all the algorithms eliminated context by shuffling shit out of chronological order#and this whole little mini rant is disjointed as fuck cause im doing it in tags#so i can only see half of my previous thought
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mavuika is confusing me and i don't like it
#so. you know how all of the archons except zhongli are at least subtly moon-coded and how this is very obviously deliberate#what with all of zhongli's sun/star imagery#now. mavuika's statues of the seven are holding orbs like the other moon archons#so at the very least she isn't god-king related like zhongli is#However i still have a hard time arguing that she could thematically be placed as a moon partly because she is The Pyro Archon#but also partly because with all the other archons thus far (excluding zhongli) there has been another person (archon figure or not)#whose goals/aspirations/etc they are reflecting in some way. that's why they're moons. they reflect the light of the sun.#mavuika - to our current knowledge - doesn't have anyone like that#one argument that i Can see working for her not being a sun like zhongli is that in teyvat the sun probably isn't actually a ball of fire#like. the stars aren't actually stars - they're rocks that are like fruits grown by the branches of irmunsul#and the travelers - who are canonically stars - are more like conduits for wishes than anything else#they actually work similarly to the gnoses because those are assumedly star fragments since they're the remains of another descender#(who we can assume was also a star because stars dictate fate and you have to have some influence over all of fate to be a descender)#so the gnoses grant power to the archons through granting the wishes of their people like mini shooting stars - that's why they're dangerous#when there isn't someone monitoring which wishes they grant and which ones they don't#Anyway. that was a bit off-topic but i guess you could suggest that the stars are closer to rocks than fire#and that mavuika is therefore not a sun (big star)#you could also argue that's she's reflecting ronova's light? ig ? idk#we'll have to wait and see tbh#sorry for such a massive tag dump lmfao
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i'm always out here talking about byan's trauma with men, but honestly they have almost as much when it comes to boys. most of the bullying, harassment, and mistreatment they received from their peers growing up came at the hands of boys. not all of it, of course, but considering that was the generalized group they were shoved into most of their life, and the one they didn't fit in with... it's where more of the damage came from.
#they're a little more lenient when it comes to boys... but not by much#like they'll give u a chance to not be trash but if u fuck that chance ur not getting another one#it's kind of... ironic in a way bc byan... kiiiind of acts in a lot of ways like the sort of boys they hate?#like lbr they have a lot of sorta stereotypical masc behaviour but the CONTEXT is different#it's more of a retaliation than like... entitlement? if I'm making sense here? 🤔#they became what they had to in order to survive#and throw that sort of stereotypically masc aggression BACK at men#sort of a way to give them a taste of their own medicine ig#...I've derailed my original intended topic a little here but this is another thing that's been on my mind adjgksh#the point is they also dislike boys bc they were hurt by them a lot. mocked by them a lot. used by them a lot.#they've got some horror stories about boys. not as many as they do about men but lbr it's not a competition#they're both trash in byan's mind (:#with limited exceptions. very VERY limited exceptions.#which no has not done much to change their fairly black & white thinking on the matter in case u were wondering#god I'm rambling someone shut me up#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made.
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I feel like certain people on Tumblr have really been fighting for backwards progress when it comes to how we talk about mental illness and abuse. I see posts at least several times a week on my dash that seem to have the purpose of implying people with insert-mental-illness and/or insert-symptom are not abusive when they do insert-action-that-makes-people-uncomfortable, often times meaning to promote a more positive image of people with particularly stigmatized conditions, like personality disorders, mood disorders, psychosis, addiction, or neurodivergence. And I really really hate it because these posts almost always have the ultimate purpose of telling people not just "This thing is not inherently abusive," but often it comes across as "You were not abused."
I just find that to be really unhelpful and unintentionally hurtful, and for what? I believe that destigmatizing various mental conditions is a worthy cause, but at the same time this type of rhetoric seems to be so protective of people in whichever stigmatized group they're trying to advocate for, that it comes back around to a sort of respectability politics. Anybody can be an abuser. And someone's means and methods of abusing can very much be influenced by a condition they have. Why wouldn't it be? Their conditions will affect every aspect of their life and their interpersonal relationships. Especially if these issues are going untreated or being insufficiently managed. I don't understand why anyone would want to make it appear as if abusers are mostly neurotypical and mentally well people, or that if they aren't, then their conditions have nothing to do with it and the overlap is merely incidental. What? It makes it so hard for anyone who is a victim to come to terms and identify the dynamics of what they've gone through.
Addicts and mentally ill people don't have to be unproblematic in order to be humanized and accepted. And nobody profits from writing hard and fast rules about how abuse apparently works, drawing clear lines between which behaviors can, and cannot, ever be abuse.
#tales from diana#making unrebloggable bc i can't handle the discourse on this topic#my own experience with being abused and taken advantage of by someone who almost CERTAINLY had npd... just kinda breaks me#when i see this and it's like making it out to be 'everyone who says they suffered from narcissistic abuse is lying#or misunderstanding what narcissism is because ppl w npd would NEVER do this'#i can see that it's a highly stigmatized term and i don't want to act like an expert on what ppl w the condition go through#but i can tell you i felt deep sympathy for this man for a long time. i felt pity for all he'd gone through. but he'd just lay on the guilt#for every little thing i did that ever displeased him for any reason. he just degraded and disrespected me. and USED me#he used me for money for attention for CONSTANT attention oh my god#he wouldn't even let me go to sleep sometimes before 3 am. and he stole so much money from me#he put me in physical danger. he gossiped about me to all my friends when i was starting to distance myself#before i even came to terms with just how toxic he was to me.#and every time i just wanted to go somewhere wo him or even just stay at home by myself#it was about HIM. it was about how HE felt about it. he had ZERO sympathy for me and i handled all his emotional labor#this man couldn't even think for himself. he brought all his problems to me for me to sort through bc he was so inept and shallow#he was lazy he was careless he didn't listen to ppl he was casually rude#i didn't allow myself to accept these parts of him bc of all he suffered through i felt like he was just a sad little boy#who never learned manners or etiquette or. just. respect#basic respect. as much as i outlined what i wasn't ok w and what hurt me. it didn't matter to him#and NONE of these things are inherently the things that make me think he has npd#his actual suffering and the things i felt bad for him about were very real and severe#but i know what happened between us and i know he was abusive to me. the ppl writing these posts do not.#to say that someone has been abusive in an interpersonal relationship should be something we should be able to respect#and give ppl the benefit of the doubt. and victims may OFTEN not be well-informed about their own abusers' issues#but ppl can just know whether or not they were abused. regardless of if they fully grasp the why and how#if victims say something problematic or paint w a broad brush talking abt ppl who have something in common w their abuser#we should still correct that gently and kindly and not dismiss their experience outright#like i can't believe i have to say that. but i've seen some seriously upsetting posts on here recently.
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I started reading Billy Bat manga by Urasawa Naoki (u may know him as the guy who did Monster) and jesus christ its wild. Absolute experience. Judas and Jesus are in it, so are ninjas, so is lee harvey oswald (technically at least 3), theres a bat thats satire about how evil mickey mouse and disney are, there's lying cartoons galore, there's the civil rights movement, the oppressivr terror of the ku klux klan and the structural damage of segregation and fucked up laws, and the pervasiveness of advertising and the coca cola company ("golden cola") there's real events sprinkled with gratuitious fictional shit about manipulative God Billy Bat (or perhaps "administrator/guide to the human race"), a scroll that could control the world, Fake walt disney has hired killers, the looming brutality of imperialism and corporations buying out poorer areas, killing in other countries and breaking laws and whatever else is needed to acquire what they want, there's a cartoon dog kennedy assasination, a baby kevin inherits the powers of an older kevin, there's ninjas and priests, there's a small town out west full of cowboy larpers who are this comic artists biggest fan club, a secret agent Smith with a heart of gold (one hopes), a teenager named jackie whos seeing visions, there's a good and evil fake "mickey mouse" bat but frankly theyre probqbly both evil cause either way they lie and manipulate to get people to do what they want, judas cameos not only in his jesus arc but as a little kiddo, and like. Im not even halfway done. Einstein JUST showed up.
#rant#billy bat#its. an experience ill say that. its wild and im kind of floored it got published#it makes a lot of good points but its also ultimately a long winding Batshit Wild Bat Cartoon-as-God MYSTERY thriller#so its like. oh you learn about the pains of cowardice. the cruelties of corporations.#the way society doesnt value a whores life as you cry for her because she was wondetful. the way being just is hard#its hard to be brave and dangerous but it uas to be done. the vile dangers of advertizing and capitalism and profit over human life.#but then also. theres a fucking bat talking to a girl in her college class lol#its an interesting perspective in a way also cause like...#1 a lot of comic artists just full on would not touch these elements in their plots at all. and while ive seen these topics in stories#before. tjis is the most Pointed Disney/governments/corporations critique ive seen in comics. since like. its literally fake disney#ajd real ass historical figures and govts getting critiqued.#then 2 in japanese manga i havent seen foreign events covered much. and its interesting to see the perspective of#world events and america from this author. and his choice to make the protagonists who he did: a japanese american whos born american#and was in the allies as a translator. part of the US occupation when he initially visits japan.#the japanese mangaka whos older than ww2. the white upper class (truly upper class) coca cola#dynasty equivalent inheritor. a lower class black woman factory worker from florida whos outspoken and a leader and#braver than her husband. their kiddo kevin whos the most important person in the world worth saving. jackie the japanese american teen girl#eho grew up Loving fake disney and is in college. her dad the taxi driver who through other people#eventhally got the courage to go reunite with his wife and daughter jackie who left him.#(oh also a european priest and JUDAS and a ninja)#its just like. the author worked hard to put what feels like a japanese and american perspective and the Many ways those overlap and Dont#into this. as well as a variety of upper class and lower class characters. the rich fake walt disney and the poor bat town mayor and elder#who get killed for standing in the way of a corporations dreams.#jackie kennedy and the sweet girl who saved cartoonist Kevin and worked the street.#the rich dynasty inheritor of golden cola and his working class wife. how it all falls away in the deep soutj with pther lines#society draws. the poor student jackie versus the other protagonists witj a job#how kevin yamagata has not much connection to japan except a fondness for his parents. while jackie is even more#culturally removed (having never even visited japan) but her family still has their heritage of stories and places they miss and#want to visit and traditions her dad still regulalry discusses.
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Is it just me or does STYX and it's whole vibe and duty remind y'all a lot of the SCP foundation.
#also. while we're on the topic of book 6:#WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON. OH MY GOD!!#also LILIAS OUT OF POCKET COMMENT WHEN WATCHING THE STARS WITH MAELLUS. WAS THIS NECESSARY?!#what the fuck were Idias parents thinking when leaving their chronically online son who has NO HEALTHY COPING MECHANISMS in charge of#an underground foundation with very dangerous beings that could cause the end of the world.
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/ GHWGHAWHGAWAW
(source)
#;ooc#ooc#I AM!! BUT A HUMBLE T.EZCA SIMP-#the man the legend; he can tear through ur skin and pull out ur heart with one hand#feasting on hearts too if he's on the mood#u know how d.antes can appear as a shadow? well t.ezca can appear as smoke and as a jaguar as well as be completly invisible to human eyes#me thinks that the idea of him not even needing to physically materialize and just consuming an enemy under a curtain of smoke is so cool#and this brings me back to one of his key points; his omnipresence; and how everyday life only reinforced that aspect to his followers#seeing a feline in the dead of the night; mist and smoke; all could be signs of t.ezca's presence in the world#he is the god that is there but that u can't see#a dangerous god that can see through the hearts of men and their truth and that can be merciful and ruthless all the same#ANYWAYS IM GOING OFF TOPIC-#the conclusion is that i am a humble t.ezca simp#the same guy buys cheap cigarettes off of gas stations that not even the owner remembers selling#my cringe fail husband t.ezca-
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I'd also argue that many of the people we see Jesus interact with in the Bible also "acted poorly." That was sort of the point.
#rn i'm thinking specifically of zacchaeus#but take a look at most of the Bible (and ourselves)#it's pretty dangerous to look at someone and think “no they're just too rude or too sinful. God doesnt want them in the Kingdom.#God came for the meek and low sure - but not THEM#tbh to keep on topic with the tax collector - are you familiar with Luke 18:9~#(didnt realize i had so much to say on this or i wouldnt have all this as tags 😅)
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I once had an English teacher who assigned us books that were definitely not all appropriate for class, and I really disliked her because, being a queer trans person, I would read it through that lens, but she always tried to dismiss my analysis of the books through this lens, but I think the worst thing she ever did was assign us Lovestar. She wanted a book originally written by an Icelander in the curriculum because this was in Iceland, but I have no idea why she chose that one. I remember every single detail of what happened in Lovestar, and I really wish I didn't. She also assigned us The God of Small Things, from which I remember most of the plot, but none of the lessons it was meant to teach. These books affected me so much in none of the ways I think they were meant to, and honestly looking back on the combination of books she assigned it also says a lot about her character and personal life that I do not care to know.
#I will admit that The God of Small Things has its value as a stirring piece of literature#If you are not heavily affected by sensitive topics I would give it a read#But considering it approaches all the sensitive topics in some way I would not call it suitable for a classroom of 15-17 year olds#Especially when those 15-17 year olds come from varying cultural backgrounds with different life experiences#I get the importance of literature that makes you uncomfortable but this book will probably trigger any trauma you might have experienced#Except for planes I don't remember it having those#In Lovestar the fuck inside a genetically modified polar bear while the world ends outside#Sure the underlying message warning of the potential dangers of misuse of technology is important#but what the fuck#also setting it in Iceland makes no sense considering most things that happen in the book would not happen in Iceland#It depicted an autistic person being able to live their life in peace and the government doesn't do that#And our native-wildlife-purist culture would never allowing the genetic modification of our puffins least of all with turkeys#I don't even care about spoiling this book because you should not read it
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Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt.3
[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.7] [Pt.8] [Pt.9] [Pt.10]
“Aquaman.” Batman swept into the room, beelining straight for the suddenly apprehensive Atlantean king.
“Batman. What can I do for you?”
“Phantom. Does he pay taxes?”
“Pardon?”
Batman makes a low noise that had Aquaman’s danger senses buzzing.
“Does Phantom have to pay taxes. Towards Atlantis.”
“No…? Why?”
“He wanted money, in exchange for… information, of a delicate sort,” Batman said, diplomatically avoiding the topic of Phantom bargaining for the identities of corpses in exchange for a measly $100 dollars per identity. Like a flea market dealer, that one was.
“You encountered Phantom again?” Aquaman perked up.
“Yes. Gotham’s bay is… polluted.” Batman paused. “With victims. Of murder.”
The entire area quieted as heads turned towards the Dark Knight.
“Yes, I am… distantly aware of Gotham’s waters.” By that, Aquaman gets green around the gills whenever he turns his awareness in that direction. There’s a reason he doesn’t enter Gotham, and the Dark Knight’s ban is only half of that reason. “Ah, but you’re correct. For what purpose would Phantom need mortal currency?”
“Hn.”
“Maybe he needs some stuff?” Flash zipped to a stop next to Batman, feet tapping as he dug into the pile of snacks cradled in his arms. “Us mortals are always coming up with new things, maybe he wants to try some games or something?”
Batman tilted his head down, seriously considering Flash’s suggestion. “It’s plausible.”
“Barry, Barry, Barry. He’s old as hell, right? He probably wants to try the new booze!”
“Hal, my man!” Flash fist bumped Green Lantern, who came up. “You’re back! What happened to John?”
“Dunno. He got called somewhere that way,” Green Lantern waved a vague hand towards the left. “Had to deal with a politician or something from that area.” He shrugged, swinging an arm over Barry’s shoulders to put him in a headlock and stealing a chip.
“Huh. Anyways, would our mortal alcohol even work on a demi-god or something?”
“We should ask!” Hal turned towards Batman. “You should ask if he wants to go for a drink, spooky!”
“He’s a child.”
“He’s been around for more than a millennia, Bats.”
“Informational gathering, right, Hal?” Flashgot out of the headlock, quickly munching on his snacks to stop Green Lantern from stealing them.
“Totally. Yup.”
“…Fine.”
“Wait, are we just gonna ignore that Gotham’s waters are full of bodies?”
“Yes.”
——
“What?” Danny asked, mind half on the bags he’s dragging out of the water and the other half on the essay he has to submit in about four hours.
“Green Lantern wanted to invite you out for a drink.”
Danny turned to the stoic Gotham knight, who had his wrist computer out to log the bodies’ info the moment Danny gave him the information. Some of them even told Danny who murdered them, so Batman could start building cases with solid leads.
Danny’s only twenty. He’s not legal yet but he doesn’t want to give any clues to who he is. How is he supposed to…
Ah!
“Can’t.” Danny shrugged. “I’m not legal. I died when I was fourteen so…” Danny trailed off, speechless at the drowned puppy face Batman was giving him. What the fuck.
“Anyways, fork over my payment.”
Batman wordlessly hands him a wad of hundreds.
“What do you need cash for?” Batman suddenly asked.
“Huh? Isn’t it obvious?” Danny tucked it in. “Material things, obviously. I need a blanket,” because holy shit, Gotham is damn cold this time of year. “Anyways, see you same time next week, litterer.”
“I don’t litter.”
“Tell that to the batarangs I found under the water,” Danny grumbled. “But I’ll stop calling you that if you get a signature from Poison Ivy. I have a friend who loves her.”
“An alive friend?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know, weatherboy?”
Danny snickered and disappeared. He’s gotta cram that essay.
——
“There’s a possibility Phantom might be homeless.”
“Batman, I mean this in the nicest way, but for the love of Atlantis, please stop giving me headaches. It’s time like these I wish I stayed a lighthouse keeper.”
#batman#danny phantom#bruce wayne#dc x dp#bamf danny phantom#dpxdc#dcxdp#hal jordan#green lantern#the flash#Barry allen#mentions of Sam mason#phantom doesn’t pay taxes#but Danny Fenton absolutely pays taxes#his parents taught him how to file taxes#tax season is coming up soon tall I’m stressed#arthur curry#Aquaman#Aquaman and being interrogated on Atlantean history#Batman’s nickname is the litterer#you can’t tell me that batarangs don’t go everywhere#sea cryptic! danny au
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