#god probably is a feral teenage girl

[neptune-scythe]

I am written by a feral teenage girl and I would like to have some words with her.

The foreshadowing is cool and all that, but can we tone down the angst and whump a bit please and thank you. Maybe put in a fun filler chapter with a silly lil adventure.

And if we're being honest it's a little repetitive, gotta quit using the same trope over and over again

And can we speed up the payoff of all the descent to villainy foreshadowing ... Maybe add in an unhinged madman arc?

And next time you put in some fluff maybe make it last thanks.

Sincerely,

Your suffering blorbo

[happi-tree]

Grant, Scary, and Taylor for the character ask!!!

Hiiiiiiii Bababird!!! Hope you're doing well 🖤🖤🖤 (also for reference: "I want to kiss them" means I want to kiss them on the forehead and tell them that everything will be. Dare I say. Alright <3)

First up: Grant Wilson! God this character can fit so much projection in him. Queer kids raised conservative Catholic got fucking ATTACKED by this guy and I am no exception! Also one of my moots (hiiiiii Seisei 🥰🥰🥰) just finished ep 35 a few days ago so I am chock full of Grant emotions. Something something the Wilson cycle of violence and hypocrisy and meaning what you say but not saying what you mean and. Sobs for one thousand years!!! Bingo for the gamer boy ever it's what he deserves <3

Up next: Scary Marlowe! She's my fucking SISTER my DAUGHTER my DARKENED MIRROR okay. Truly one of the teen girls of All Time and I literally have tears in my eyes as I'm typing this she means!!! So much to me!!! I am holding her gently in my arms and I am shielding her bodily from some of the meanies on this webbed site. She is also a fave of one of my moots (hey Ivy ✌️) but tbh I think she's become so dear to me that she's evolved Pokemon style from proxy blorbo to perhaps. Second blorbo. Favorite dndads character to play dress-up with also <3 I am literally so in awe of the arc she's had so far and I hope to everything that she finds happiness and belonging and- *rant fades out into the distance*

Ok so! Someone else ALSO asked for Taylor so I think I will tackle him in that one if you don't mind hehe :D Rest assured though I have Many Thoughts about this boy 😌

[buckyalpine]

18+ Minors dni. Buckys innocent neighbor who bakes him cookies and muffins just cause. The girl next door who has the coziest apartment he's ever been in. Shelves filled with books along with plenty of comfy blankets decorating the couches. Bucky has his own place right across but home is with her (even if she doesn't know it yet).

She's the type of girl he's going to take his time with, asking her out on a date, just coffee and a walk in the park. Nothing more than a kiss on her cheek at the end of the night. Another date. Dinner. Another kiss to her other cheek. He wouldn't dare rush anything, especially not someone as soft and sweet as her.

He feels like such a dirty little pervert when he thinks about her afterwards when he's alone in bed, all the blood in his body rushing south, and fuck he's so hard. He tries to ignore it, he didn't want to do something so debauched by thinking of her like that, he even tries to think about his grocery list, laundry, he'd probably wash his arm later, it would probably be fine in the dishwasher-

Nothing worked.

He groans, shuffling and kicking his sweats off, hissing when his hand goes down to tug at his aching cock, relief flooding his veins at the sensation. He lets his mind wander to how adorable she'd be, the way he'd take her apart in the most gentle way. Lay her against the pillows while he holds those soft thighs apart, giving her the most feather light suckles on that perfect clit, basking in all the sounds she'd make. He strokes himself faster thinking about the way he'd get her ready to take all of him. How he'd make it so good for her-shit he was going to blow-maybe if he was lucky, one day she'd let him put his cock in her mou-

"Fuck!!" Bucky threw his head back, spurts of cum shooting from his sensitive head, his post orgasm haze leaving him feeling like a filthy old man. She were here making him baked treats and he was jerking his dick off like a sick fuck.

Then the night finally comes. Bucky is ready to cuddle and nothing else but he's thrown off because never in his wildest fantasies did he expect this.

She is the girl who sends him reeling the first time he takes her clothes off one by one revealing dark ink on her back and hips. He has to suppress a growl, his eyes growing wide at the scantily clad lace that covers her body.

"Like what you see, Sergeant?" she practically purrs in his ear while he lets his han ghost over her bare skin, his chest heaving when his eyes fall to her perfect breasts, hints of silver peeking from under her lingerie, there was no way-

"Can I?" He asks breathlessly, his hand reaching behind to unclasp the bra, those pretty pierced nipples begging to be sucked.

Bucky who turns into a fucking menace, his entire world flipping upside down when she grinds down on his crotch not hiding exactly what she needs from him. He doesn't even have the ability to hide how feral he is, letting all his inhibitions slip.

-

"My little bunny's a slut, fuck, c'mere" He grabs you and tosses you over his shoulder, hauling you over to his bedroom like an untamed beast, tossing you onto his bed with no remorse. You're in nothing but your panties which he rips right off, your thighs squeezing together at the way he stalks over to you, his hungry eyes raking up and down your body without an ounce of shame. He tugs his sweats down to reveal his leaky cock, stroking it at the edge of his bed after tossing his shirt off.

"See this baby? Been fuckin' stroking and touching myself like a fuckin' teenager because of you-" He throws off his pants before climbing onto the bed and kneeling between your thighs, spreading them apart with his knees, "-and you've been here lookin' like God damn sin under those cute little sweaters"

He flicks his cockhead against your clit, humming at the clear beads of his arousal that drip onto your cunt.

"Fuck James, need more, pl-"

"Nuh uh, what was that you called me earlier, sweets?" He lets out a dark chuckle, the veins in his cock throbbing as he tightly holds the base, waiting to hear it again.

"Sergeant" you whine with mischief in your eyes and Bucky is a goner. He'll taste you later and most definitely feed you his cock another day but right now he wants to be nowhere else other than your pussy. He wants to watch you take every bit of him, rolling over to lay on his back while you straddle him, his length slotted against your cunt. He holds it up for you with a cocky look on his face, moaning when his tip breeches your tight pussy, your walls gripping his swollen, pink head.

"That's just the tip baby, c'mon, sit on it, wanna put all of my dick in you, that's it, good girl-shittt"

"Oh fuccckk,s'big" You moan feeling the stretch as you sink all the way down, panting and staying still while you adjust to his size.

"That's it bunny, that's it, ride me, ride your Sergeant" He grabs you by the hips, guiding you to grind down on him, making you feel his entire cock in your stomach. "You're a slut for big dick aren't you baby, acting all cute and shy when all you really wanted was the winter soldier's cock"

Bucky wasn't even sure where all the filth spewing from his mouth was even coming from but he couldn't stop.

"S'that it bunny? Say it baby, tell me how much you wanted my fat cock in you"

"Wanted it! F-cuk Sergeant, wanted your cock s-o-so bad!!"

"Fuck yes!!" His feet plant to meet your bounces, his hips thrusting up, slamming his entire length into you. "M'close, fuck bunny, gonna cum already, I can't hold it-

He doesn't have time to be embarrassed. You feel to good. He rubs your clit needing you to cum all over him so he can let go.

"Please, cum all over Sergeants cock baby, give it to me, be a good girl n'cum, c'mon, cum on my dick, yes, oh fuck yes I can feel it-milk it, shit touch my balls-"

You nearly collapse as your orgasm starts to wash over you, his sponge head hitting the most sensitive parts against your walls while he toys with your clit. His voice is muffled as you start to feel waves of pleasure consume you but you head just enough to reach behind, rubbing his heavy, so full of cum ba-

"FUUUCCCCKKK" He grabs you and wraps his arms around your body while he relentlessly thrusts up, biting down on your shoulder while he lets out the sluttiest, loudest moan with 0 remorse. It feels too good and he's sure the neighbors can hear but honestly, everyone should know how amazing it feels.

-

"I got you pretty baby" Bucky coos as you nuzzle into the crook of his neck, a shiver running through you while you float in bliss. Bucky pulls the covers up, deciding to cuddle up with you for a bit before running a shower, his previous demeanor replaced with the far less debauched version of him.

Anyway, just an idea. Also, it's past my bedtime.

[guillotinna]

I keep seeing these Gen z is task force 141 and I wanna join

Anytime you use a computer, you do that stupid movie hacker trope of exaggerated typing and say "I'm in"

Saying "POV" in front of sentences

In the group chat saying "1 like and I'll kms", liking your own message and then saying "damn guess I gotta"

I see a lot of these posts were Gaz and Soap would understand y/n....bffr, no those geezers would not

No one knows what the gen z kid is saying they just know it's probably not good

"You're telling me a shrimp fried this rice?"

You have a small photo you keep tucked in your chest pocket and after enough times seeing you looking lovingly at it, one of the guys asks who it is. Is it a s/o from back home? 😏😏

You say no and pull out a photo card of your fave singer and they're like ??? Really

One time during a particularly physical scuffle with the enemy, you get thrown to the ground and huff out "one hop this time" only to promptly tackle tf outta your assailant while saying "take it back now yall"

Reads everyone's zodiac charts except ghost bc he won't tell his birthday let alone the time he was born so you just make one up

Price calls a 6 am meeting to which you say "double it and give to the next person"

*Alexa, play teenagers by MCR*

If you had time describe the base, you'd say it smells like ball sweat, blood and war crimes which everyone took offense to for different reasons

Would absolutely get soaps doodles tattooed

Actually speaking of which, imagine getting caught giving yourself stick and pokes with a pen and being banned from using pens period

You'd be in a meeting with a #2 pencil

Ofc a gen z member would be absolutely feral which very little regard for their own safety much to the dismay of the others

Quoting "Oh these aren't homemade, they were made in a factory....a bomb factory......they're bombs." All the time around soap even though he has no idea what you're talking about

You don't spent too much alone time with ghost bc he likes quiet and you can't be alone with your thoughts which is why you lean more towards spending time with soap or gaz

I just like puns so I'm gonna add this but gen z love borgs (a customized gallon jug of alcohol that is usually given a name) and yours is appropriately named taskforce 1-borg-1

this is mainly for my americans but i know pretty much the whole world got beef with engl*nd: before you met Soap, you thought the entire 141 was en*lish so when you finally did meet him, you said "oh thank god" with a sigh

americans 🤝 scotts

making fun of english "people"

"Pull up in the monster, automobile gangsta With a bad bitch that came fr-" "....sergeant, comms off please"

you show Ghost WAP and he has to take a walk

*price yelling at gaz and soap*: KYLE GARRICK AND JOHN MACTAVISH GET IN HERE- Y/n: oop not the government name

Another for my US baddies: if your'e ever arguing with any of the guys, the nail in the coffin would be "and it's called soccer"

"one more like and i'll-" "enough!"

you call Price "ms. girl" and he could not be more confused

someone asks "do you serve?" and u reply "yah, serve cunt"

when asked why you decided to join the military you said something like: "well i didnt think i'd live past 18 so when I did, i ended up here".....crickets from the rest of the team

"good thing we only have showers on base because i would have already taken a toaster bath by now"

ask Gaz "no bitches?🤨" one more time see what happens

price: the enemies have taken civvies hostage and blocked off all exits and entrances to the town-" y/n: "omg tea"

Also calling price "capt. Save-a-hoe"....I wanna be saaaavvveddd ;)

If you took a shot every time you said "rest in peace to all the soldiers that died in the service, I dive in her cervix", you'd be dead lmao

When asked if they like the military they'd say "it was either this or the psych ward so yah, I'll take it"

Quoting MPGIS constantly and no one even sort of knows what that is ("Crack. Is that what you smoke? You smoke crack?")

Some detainee being interrogated is spilling some nonsense, so you hit them with "oh brother this guy stinks!" And then with the butt of your gun

"Little bad trini bitch but she mixed with China, real thick vagina, smuggle bricks to-" "SARGENT ENOUGH"

Falling asleep on team mates (minus ghost's) shoulders mostly because the most peace they get is when you're unconscious

*when y/n hears any slightly suggestive/dirty phrase*: what are we talking about 😏 (iykyk)

Same energy as: " born next to a nuclear power plant, has an IQ of 2 and was hit in the head with several Rocks as a child"

Vine quotes out the wazoo, it's just awful for the rest of the team lmao

Replying to everything with "on god?"

soap: "what are you 6?" y/n: "yah 6 inches deep in your mom".....you did not walk away from that unscathed to say the least...worth it tho

[sugar-coat-it]

hi belle! what do you think body piercer is like as a bf 👉👈

also would you do an alphabet or something for him? lowkey dying for more content for him

Hiii!! <3 

Omgggg wait wait let me tell you some details

He’s very much into punk rock (Fugazi, Rage Against The Machine, etc.) and lives in his band tees. Much like the back room of the parlor, a lot of his stuff is covered in stickers for his fav bands. So I think he’d really like to introduce his girl to his music if she’s willing to try it out, it would mean a lot to him!

Whenever he picks her up, he’s always blasting music LOUD so she knows when he arrives 

Big fan of CDs. You can bet your ass that he’s burning CDs for her for all sorts of things. Songs that remind him of her, songs he wants to fuck her to. Some of them are stupid too, like “Good Shit” scrawled in black Sharpie on a disc. Sometimes he’ll scribble little drawings on there too. His handwriting is shit and she loves it.

Also music related, he's an amazing concert bf, always making sure she can see and no one is getting too close to her. He'd be SO PROUD if she went to a punk rock show with him

Now… if she ever did say she was interested in getting another piercing of any kind, he is begging her to let him do it for her (for free, with princess treatment). He’s very much like “fuck yeah, do it” whenever she brings up a tatt or piercing of any kind

Quietly cuddling, he’s tracing her features with his finger, he comes to the bridge of her nose and he’s suddenly like “You have a good nose for a septum piercing” and she’s like “???”

He remembers everything about her, and he makes a point to, even if he has to write sticky note reminders to himself sometimes (ADHD brain as hell)

This man SMOKES. My god his marijuana tolerance level is ungodly. If his girlie is into it too, it would be the joy of his life to roll spliffs for her.

Big fan of getting baked with her, putting on music, and then going off about the album’s impact on the music world because he knows she likes listening to him talk, and none of his boys let him ramble on nearly as much

The late-night diner visits after hotboxing his car go CRAZY (side note, don’t ask me why, but I feel like he has a rubber duck on his dashboard)

One time after a smoke session they built a fort in his room and made out for close to an hour, all giggly and hazy

I think he’d like to let his girl paint his nails. He prefers black, but he wouldn’t mind painting his nails the same shade as girlie’s so they can match

He also let her braid his mohawk once… lol

Tea had sent me an idea about this, but he’d absolutely buy her engraved jewelry. Like… barbells with hearts that have little M’s engraved on them??? Holy shit 

Also, from a discussion with B, HE GOES SO FERAL WHEN SHE GOES BRALESS AND HE CAN SEE HER PIERCINGS THROUGH HER TOP

He keeps a Polaroid picture of her both in his wallet and at the desk in the shop 

If anyone asks about it he’s like “THAT’S THE LIGHT OF MY FUCKING LIFE”

Veeery possessive. Not to a toxic point, but she is his, and he makes sure that everyone is aware in his own little ways 

He likes to be touching her almost all the time. Whether it’s an arm lazily slung around her shoulders or lacing their pinkie fingers together

Really likes love bites. One time he left hickeys in the shape of a heart on her collarbone 

Y’all remember that hip pouch thing he wore during the 2020 era? That but it’s filled with his girl’s things like her lipstick or her wallet so she doesn’t have to carry them

Teenage boy humor. Hella “that’s what she said” jokes

He forgets stuff at her place constantly. She’s starting to wonder if it’s on purpose at this point. Maybe it’s his own way of feeling like a more permanent part of her life

Finding his jewelry on her dresser, his lighter on her coffee table, a hoodie hung by the door

Sometimes he’ll leave his keys and come running back into her place just to end up messily kissing her against the wall

Overall, I think he probably looks a little intimidating to people because he has a mohawk and wears chains and platform boots but he’s such a sweetheart oh my god anon. He just loves her so so so much, and he’s so gentle with her. I love him. So much. That’s my baby.

And as for an alphabet, maybe! I’d be happy to if that’s something you guys would want to see

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Can you tell us how your boys feel about kids.

I saw that blue doesn’t like children so I got curious.

Undertale Sans - He's not very expressive so it's hard to know, but he likes kid a hell lot. They're funny, gullible and they somehow takes everything he's saying for true which leads to the best laughs of his life. He's a bit nostalgic too of the time it was just him and Papyrus.

Undertale Papyrus - He loves kids, but it's not difficult because he loves everyone. But his kid especially. He's going to make sure they never miss anything to the point he can get a bit protective and it's certainly not an unhealthy way to cope with how painful his childhood was in the streets :D

Underswap Sans - Oh god, please no. Children make him so nervous. He's very uncomfortable around them, and he usually lets S/O take care of them if he has some one day. He is full of insecurities, way more than he thinks, and the fact his brother almost died from starvation when they were younger probably is the cause of that. He prefers to stay away.

Underswap Papyrus - He loves children, he wants children. He's one of the best dad to have, very loving and attentive, and he's working hard on his insecurities with children, to the point they completely disappear sometimes. He's just dad material.

Underfell Sans - He's a great dad, he just doesn't know it... Red spends more time thinking he will be a horrible dad and not enough realizing all the kids in the neighborhood likes him and sees him as a sort of father figure. If he ever has a child, that will be the revelation of the century for him lol.

Underfell Papyrus - He loves children but he's way too protective so when the kids reach the teenage era, he might struggle a lot with this. He wants all his kids safe and it's a bit obsessional. Other than that, he's a great dad. A little strict, but patient. He explains things very well to kids too.

Horrortale Sans - He loves kids but kids don't love him all the time :( He's always sad when he accidentally makes a child cry in the street because he's big and scary. He's nothing but a huge teddy bear with his own kid, with a bit of feral paternity lol. He's very nice, but threat his kids and suddenly you might die lol.

Horrortale Papyrus - He loves children, but it's hard to keep up with their energy. He has too many health problems to raise kids, or that's what he tells himself because he has no self-confidence. He's a gentle giant. He's lecturing kids a lot though. He's definitely a dad-strict-mom deep inside.

Swapfell Sans - See that squirrel girl from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? That's his kid. Nox has a dad girl who always comes looking for him when she has any problem and he will say yes to any of her temper tantrums because that's his little princess. That's his baby girl and he will fight anything trying to take her from him with his fists lol.

Swapfell Papyrus - He's that Dad who doesn't seem to really care about anything, but it's actually not the case. He likes when kids learn things by themselves, so yeah, the kid is going to get hurt, a lot. But they will draw on all his bones too, cooking explosive cakes, paints the walls of the house... Rus is a fun dad.

Fellswap Gold Sans - Uh, no thanks. Kids make him too anxious. He's struggling with Coffee already, he doesn't need more people he needs to watch over obsessionally, thanks. Or he could take the opportunity to, you know, see a therapist about this. But, uh, not today.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He's going to give his anxiety to his kids lol. They all have a very strong bond when they are together. However, if one of them is missing, everyone is panicking, father including, and it turns terribly wrong. Every time. That's going to be complicated lol.

[sergeant-angels-trashcan]

oh no I fully planted the seeds of jaydickate knowing it would probably get horny 😂

i could wax poetic about how soft they can be (and i absolutely think they are) but i think especially when they’re first messing around… they are FERAL. they have awakened some Things™️ in one another. kate goes headfirst into this established complicated relationship featuring more than a little rivalry and she thinks oh this is fine and she’s in control and can make these boys behave… and then she can’t walk after. girl has bitten off more than she can chew and she is loving all of it.

i also just enjoy thinking about how not a single one of them is good at reacting to things in a normal manner so god help us all if one of them gets hurt, the other two are going to burn the world to the ground.

Oh thank god

Thinking about the Worst One to get injured because the combo of the other two is too chaotic. and there IS no worst one because each revenge combo is fucking terrifying.

Kate is injured? That's the fucking crime lord Red Hood, who fears no god or Bat, and Nightwing who people only think is less terrifying than Batman because he smiles more. Goons would pick a fight with Batman over Nightwing. This is the first Robin, who was groomed as a child to be a Talon for the Court of Owls, and the second Robin, who died and then was trained by the League of Assassins. They have both been Batman (I think Jason has, I just don't know when?). I mean this might be the most terrifying option simply because you pissed off Batman. You pissed off at least three, because Bruce would at the very least be angry on behalf of Dick and Jason, and the sword Robin (because Dick and Jason are his favorites you can't change my mind) and probably Black Bat who is arguably also Batman. That's like four Batmen what the fuck is wrong with you. And this is terrifying because Dick and Jason (and Cass and Damian) have the Batman Training but NOT the Batman moral code. Honestly Bruce is the only reason this outcome isn't pants shittingly terrifying. If the boys call her team in? Now you have two angry gods to deal with too. And Jason will gladly lock Bruce in a closet so the voice of reason is gone. Vengeance is mine, sayeth the lord etc etc.

But then if Dick is injured...well, Jason and Kate are toeing the nonlethal methods line to begin with. They basically sneeze and they are over it. And without Dick to pull them back with "they suffer longer if you keep them alive" they are going to do whatever they deem necessary. Jason "heads in a duffle bag" Todd and Kate "casually shoots people in the throat" Bishop. Once again, that is the fucking crime lord Red Hood and a goddamn Avenger. To avenge, that's to exact vengeance. That's her JOB. not protect not defend not promote justice. AVENGE. Honestly just call her a fury cos that's what she is. She WILL blow shit up she just might make sure not to do it around Jason. Look, if Kate can keep her shit together there's a good chance Jason will follow her lead and not steal bones. However, she is NOT going to keep her shit together which means there is no one holding Jason's leash. (Well, there is, Kate is holding it, she's just saying 'attack' more than normal. And Jason trusts her moral compass, so he'll do it without question. Not that he wouldn't do it himself for Dick, but it's nice to let someone else make the choice.) And they will absolutely not listen to anyone, not listening to authority figures is a DEFINING part of their time as teenage superheroes. There's like three people they might listen to and none of those people are going to tell them to calm down, and every person who WOULD tell them to calm down they will tell to fuck right off. Specifically Batman and Captain America.

Dick and Kate is the surprise terrifying one. Jason gets injured and nobody is really worried that Kate and Dick are going to go off the rails. They ARE the rails! They are the nice ones! The good ones! Wait what do you mean you found them waterboarding the Joker? Some idiot is going to think that it's JUST Jason. They won't go crazy. He's the Red Hood, this should be expected, right? Its not a surprise. Comes with the job, right? It's not like he's a real good guy--idk who says this, but someone does. And that's when they truth comes out.

This is THEE horrifying combo because first, everyone thinks they will be calm and levelheaded because they are team leaders and established solo heroes, they are respected, they've been doing this since they were kids--

WRONG! what they've actually been doing is stacking up a lifetime of Good Hero chips and now they are cashing in for their murder hall pass. And they are going to get so much more worked up if they feel the response from the Bats et al is not sufficient. if it's a "no one mourns the wicked" moment and you aren't upset because you think Jason is a bad person and he deserved it the cops WILL start finding pieces of your body before you are dead. That's Dick's Little Wing, are you fucking insane? He gets suuuuuuper possessive of Jason and a thousand times more protective of Kate. He will bite.

Hot take i think Dick and Kate are more deeply unhinged than Jason. Jason wears his anger openly, his violence is there for everyone to see. Dick and Kate have to hide that shit, hold it back, because of who they are and who they are seen as. They aren't keeping themselves in check if you hurt Jason. Jason has been hurt enough. Such a source of angst too when Jason is well enough to learn what they did for him and he's all "I'm not worth it you shouldn't have done that for me" which obviously makes Dick and Kate mad because he IS worth it

Also Dick and Jason canonically getting mistaken for each other, Dick steps in as Red Hood so that there's no a power vacuum in Gotham in case word gets out Red Hood is out of the game. I just want Dick to take over for Jason I think that is very hot I think Jason and Kate would literally be on their knees for him. I'm sorry. I'm sorry they are all so into it and I'm sure it means something psychosexually but we're not looking at it that deeply

Either one of the boys getting injured is sooo funny because I do believe that everyone thinks Kate has a no killing rule. She doesn't kill when she and the boys start...whatever...and then she's spending a lot of time in Gotham and generally she doesn't try to antagonize Bruce. Like she wears purple and shoots arrows and has a dog and a shark. She's just a goof! She doesn't kill people!

Except she very much does. She's been not killing people as a courtesy. You hurt her boys, she's done being polite. Kate on a murderous rampage is very hot btw. I think if she has a dark alter ego she goes by Shrike. You know the birds who impale their prey? Yes she could pick up the Ronin identity because Clint and Kate sharing alter egos is something that can be so personal, but also I think Kate should be able to murder people in horrifying ways with a cool costume redesign as a little treat. (Tim would help her with this btw)

fwiw the next most terrifying person for someone to go after when this relationship configuration exists is Roy and/or Clint, and Roy slightly more, because if you go after Clint you have all the other Avengers trying to stop them from exacting their bloody vengeance.

Anyway let's go back to Kate biting off more than she can chew. She wrangles superhero boys as her job. Literally her job. Personally and professionally. She can totally handle this! Genuinely have no idea how they get together though.

Do they have something going on in costume? Do they hook up at a gala? I've talked a little about Hawkeye being into Red Hood and Kate Bishop being into Dick Grayson and honestly Dick and Jason being mistaken for one another makes this funnier or angstier. Like she genuinely thought Dick was the Red Hood and the Red Hood was Dick. Considering how flippy Jason can canonically be, you know, it's not completely stupid. Jason and Dick, who do not see anything in common with each other, are deeply offended by this. Did she not notice the different personalities??? And in her defense she DOES understand the concept of a secret identity, she thought it was him trying to distance his night self from his day self!

She tries to engage their competitiveness to help them break through stuff emotionally and it does eventually work (because they realize they can ruin her more thoroughly as a team but who's counting?) But before that moment there's a lot of uhhhhhh Kate having to sit missions out because she can't walk very well. At some point she enacts a sex embargo because 1. She needs to get work done and 2. They need to come up with ways other than sex to compete with each other.

This turns into Dick and Jay's Kate Sex Ban which involves them making out with each other (as a GOOF) and slamming each other into walls to grind etc in order to make her jealous/get her hot and bothered with NO RELIEF!!!

obviously this backfires spectacularly when they realize they're....kind of...into???? each other?????

One of the defining points of Jason and Dick being less asshole competitive with one another is when some B-tier rogue says something derogatory about Hawkeye. Maybe something about Red Hood setting up so the rest of the rogues can run train on her since he shares her with fucking Nightwing no problem, and honestly Red Hood can do better than Nightwing! Just because you have to work with the Bats sometimes doesn't mean you have to share your slut or something and

You insulted Hawkeye AND nightwing. implying there is someone better than Nightwing???? that Hawkeye could not kick the asses of all the rogues??? thinking the only thing she is good for is sex?!?!?!?!!?

They're going to be scraping you off the pavement bucko.

(Kate 100% sincere when she asks what running train is. And both of them have a split second of "oh what if she learns and she's INTO it???" without speaking or even looking at each other they decide their first pick is Roy, second is Eli. just like. IF she's curious)

of course another option is established jaydick which i love (mostly because it means i don't have to navigate how their dynamic shifts from fellow Bats to boyfriends bc i am bad at it) but ALSO because it means Kate thinks she is Just A Friend and Jason and Dick have been actively hitting on her for four months. this version goes from 0 to 60 so fast because Jay and Dick have ironed out a lot of the kinks in the bedroom between them which means they are incredibly good at working together to Wreck Kate's Shit.

I mean honestly there's no version of this where Kate is not in over her head. Kate is used to being the dominant personality in her relationships in that she's assertive and she's confident in herself, and she does have a habit of going for guys who are...not. At least not at her level. (this is where the team dynamic comes in for me. regardless of how strong willed etc people she dates are, if they're on a team together, she's the leader and them defaulting to her becomes a habit but i digress)

but the boys are very big personalities as well as physically large. kate doesn't have to make herself smaller in any way which i think is a nice chance for her to get even more comfortable in her own skin

what was i talking about

right, so kate isn't used to people who are leaders in their own right towering over her and telling her that actually she will not be calling the shots tonight and then like. holding to that. neither of them are scared of her either

(they are. they are just less scared of her than most men are. and with jason and dick it's like a scared and horny)

And kind of easing over control to Jason "Service Top" Todd and Dick "Praise Kink" Grayson who are tag teaming?!!?!

[leahnardo-da-veggie]

OC Headcannon tag!

Looks like everyone else is doing it, so I guess I'll jump on! Thanks @illarian-rambling, @theink-stainedfolk, @fortunatetragedy, @willtheweaver, @beloveddawn-blog and whoever else tagged me :)

Rules: use this headcanon generator to generate some headcanons for your OCs! How accurate are they?

Let's start with Luna!

Luna almost drank the lethal dosage of caffine once.

You know what, I believe that. She's got the self-control of a feral squirrel.

Luna has a mary sue oc.

If she has any, they would definitely all be Mary Sues :)

Luna is oblivous to any and all romantic interest someone may show them.

She might be aromantic, but she's not blind. She'd know. (And be deeply disgusted.)

Next up: Iraela :)

Iraela is pansexual.

Lmao no. She's the straightest straight to ever straight.

Iraela knows fnaf lore.

This does psychic damage upon reading, but I have to agree. In a world in which fnaf lore is available, she would definitely be a fan.

Iraela likes to sing at 4 in the morning. Their neighbors hate them.

Also absolutely true, if she had neighbours to annoy.

And to round them all up: Katherine! (Oh god I still haven't written the epilogue for apns)

Katherine has been to prison.

Depends on what you count as prison, I guess. She'd sure say her home was a prison.

Katherine does intricate and expensive cosplays.

Again, depends on what you count as cosplay. (Technically, she's been running around in the world's most intricate cosplay of a teenage girl, so...)

Katherine has one, very simple word that they cannot figure out how to pronounce.

Absolutely not. She's too pedantic to allow that to occur. She probably has like 5 dictionaries memorised just in case.

Tagging @drchenquill, @mundanemoongirl, @possiblylisle, @paeliae-occasionally and anyone else interested!

[kaen-ace-of-diamonds]

Christmas Horror Kids Tournament

Because this isn't the Hunger Games, the kids are in competition but not in direct opposition to each other. Basically: there's some big monster/villain threatening their holiday, which of these main characters is not just surviving but is coming out on top the fastest?

Propaganda for each contender (and spoilers for all movies mentioned) under the cut:

Pietari: fears neither God nor death nor army of feral elves. good at keeping calm under pressure and making plans on the fly. carries a gun around the whole movie but never actually uses it, so not sure how well he could shoot. his actor was 11 when the movie came out but I think he's supposed to be a few years younger?

Luke: horrific demon child, zero moral limits so long as he gets what he wants, -5000/10 would not recommend babysitting. extremely good planner, but vulnerable to overlooking small details that ruin him. about 12: very smart but fairly immature for his age. has to be reminded not to kill his competition this time.

Thomas: literally just wanted to stay home and play trains with his grandpa, but now he's got to defend them both from a killer Santa. models himself after action movie heroes and is so good at Home Alone-ing his house that his director tried to sue for plagiarism. about 10-11 years old?

Anna: would be better with her friends to help her, but is pretty damn capable of making it in the zombie apocalypse on her own. not sure exactly how old she's supposed to be, since I'm not clear on how the New Zealand school system works, but she's an older teenager.

Billy: definitely has his wits closer about him than his dad does, that's for fucking sure. does get tricked into creating gremlins, but you know what, who would have expected them to have fucked with his clock? successfully takes on and kills an army of gremlins, albeit with help. probably the oldest competitor here since he's out of high school (?)

Max: definitely willing to go to bat for the Christmas spirit, and to put his own life on the line to protect his family, but is pretty severely lacking in strength or savvy. is good at dodging an army of killer toys, but might not do so well without a bunch of relatives around to also be targets. like Pietari, his actor was 12 but I think he's supposed to be a bit younger.

Trudy: ngl, might be a little weak in solo competition, since she's maybe 7-8 years old and so relies a lot on Santa the one-man army. but she's clever, has exactly zero fear of hardened criminals with machine guns, and is very good at turning Home Alone traps exactly as deadly as they should be.

Winnie: the most Final Girl (TM) out of all the competitors imho. learns very quickly how to improvise and use whatever's handy as a weapon, and while she's also best with a partner to distract an opponent, can handle herself very competently in a physical fight. about 17?

Samantha and Clara: actually, fuck Billy, does Clara even count as a kid at all, being an ancient demon in the form of a child? has telekinetic powers and is good at Breaking Speeches, but is bound by being sealed in the school and unable to kill her enemies herself. Samantha is a pretty normal middle schooler (?), but also has the guts to go face a cult of killers with an axe when she could have run away and saved herself, so don't count her out.

Kevin: is Home Alone a horror movie? no. could I possibly exclude the king, the champion, the future Jigsaw apprentice? also no. smart and absolutely cold-blooded when he needs to be, he's excellent at fending enemies off from a distance, but it's game over for him if he's actually caught.

[loisfreakinglane]

Top 5 things/people you love about the buffyverse?

oh THIS is a fun retrospective. i haven't yet started buffyverse rewatch 2k24- but it's happening SOON. i've given myself a new edict to scrub away 27 years of btvs/ats opinions, loves, hates, fandom histories, annoyances, EVERYTHING- and go into this rewatch totally fresh, to let opinions form as organically as they can for a universe so near and dear to my heart since i was. god lol 6 years old. i'm personally hoping characters, ships, and plots that i've found hopelessly aggravating before, i find blazing passionate love for now. WOULDN'T THAT BE FUN THO??? i'm sick of negativity, i wanna embrace joy.

before i scrub myself clean, it's nice to remember why i was invested for so many years in the first place. SO. TOP 5 THINGS/PEOPLE I LOVE ABOUT THE BUFFYVERSE!!!!!!!!! not exactly my favorite 5 EVER about the buffyverse, but an assortment of 5. 5 separate top favorite things.

cordelia chase- my love my life my soul my queen c. the thing is. i adore her. i adore her as a bitchy mean girl, using her wealth and her beauty and her status to squash down our heroes. i adore her as a broke struggling actress, using a vampire detective agency as a stepping stone for international stardom. i adore her as a genuine hero, embracing her destiny, choosing to be a demon, and fully throwing herself into fighting the good fight because it fills her soul with purpose, belonging, and fulfillment. she has an utterly flawless character arc, one that parallels buffy's own in so many ways. (and fyi as a sidenote i am ENTIRELY POSITIVE that in ats s4 amnesiac cordy was 100% cordy, jasmine did not take over her body until she had the vision of the beasts eyes, and then it was real cordelia again in you're welcome. there's not question or ambiguity about it for me personally, not anymore.) my love for cordelia is all encompassing. i love her more than anything.

buffy&dawn, angel&connor- probably my favorite plot for both buffy and angel was when they each gained a kid who automatically became the most important part of their life (while my ultimate buffyverse otp is angel/cordy, i am very fond of bangel- and my biggest proponent for a postseries reconciliation revolves around this shared life experience) there is so much i love about both characters getting an auto-grown, magically created, blue eyed brown haired impossible teenager dumped in their lap (with bonus world-altering magical memories making their existence assimilated and accepted). giving them both not just another person to love, but another human being that is entirely reliant upon them specifically for love, protection. one person with the power to uplift or destroy them, through their own actions or the actions of another. buffy and angel both went through phases of being willing to destroy the whole world just to keep them safe- buffy in the gift, angel in forgiving. i just think it's NEAT. i probably spend more time thinking about angel & connor bc i do remain frustrated with a lot of choices made wrt them in s4 (the decision to lean far harder into whiney ungrateful teenager and less into feral hellchild raise by ultrareligious 18th century man in a barren wasteland of demons was in fact frustrating to me!) but hey, i still love connor in all his messy angsty ways. and origin/not fade away put a pin in that conversation in ways i will adore FOREVER.

the concept/importance of families of choice. for as much as i've waxed poetic over two of the series core biological relationships lol, the real center of both shows is always that love between a group of unrelated misfits. i've gone back and forth over the years on my opinion of many of the relationships within the buffyverse, and how successful those families can be- but it is still something i really love. and it's especially at the heart of what has been my 2 favorite seasons- buffy s5, and angel s3- which, only hitting me now, is also when dawn & connor are introduced, which brings the group much closer together. it's unfortunate tho, that in this world of two separate families of choice, with an assortment of characters from a large variety of backgrounds, that we only got one main that's not white. forever the biggest problem with both shows. and also why i won't shut up about how kendra should have been brought back. SHE ONLY DIED A LITTLE!

wolfram&hart as a main baddie. lawyers are evil. we know this. LOL BUT RLY THO. god! a perfect PERFECT villain, perfect way to use the fuckery of the legal world to impose your will upon broke private detectives. lawyers are everywhere, i'm p sure there's more lawyers in california than in any other state. we are very litigious. the mystery behind ~the senior partners~ that is always hanging over our heads, the horror that can be inflicted by these very human lawyers engaging in blood sacrifice, murder, every evil thing under the sun- and the fact our heroes can't exactly run around killing them because a. human and b. there's way fucking more where they came from. of course they were never defeated, of course they are a main villain from beginning to end. i have less fond memories about the state of wr&h in s5, but that's less about them and more about how our heroes try to utilize their resources (badly, it's badly). lilah morgan, one of the best antagonists EVER. holland manners, linwood murrow, gavin park. they come at angel investigations from every angle- sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. but they. never. stop. 10000% perfection.

okay this one is more...... idk. this is a random thing i've been thinking about. and it's set design. lmfao. maybe it's because these shows have been part of my life for so many decades, because i grew up watching and rewatching and rewatching, but there's so much i love about their main sets. the hyperion hotel is one of my favorite locations on tv ever. the magic box! the sunnydale high library! i feel like i too lived in these locations. and i wanna go BACK!!!!!!!

[koutone]

vexshipping is sooo cute i love hearing you talk about it!! i'd love to hear more about how bakura accidentally confesses and anzus reaction! for me i feel like between him freaking out and her working through denying her feelings he'd run off before she could answer and they'd have to have a redo confession later probably initiated by anzu this time since i imagine he'd be like a hissing scared cat thinking she was gonna come reject him every time so he runs off or hides (totally NOT in a cowardly way ofc its a tactical retreat obviously). but i'm curious on your thoughts too as vexshipping ceo ^^

I SMILED SO HARD READING THIS... YOU ARE SO SWEET....... ;U; !!

i just think bakura doesnt have a filter when he starts passionately yapping about his plans to fuck the world into eternal darkness or whatever and i think that towards the end of his speech when he's at his most manic he'd slip and say that "the stupid girl's charm won't work to stop him again" or something like that. they both know anzu isn't dense and immediately know what he just admitted to so of course bakura, wanting to get blasted into oblivion, disappears never to be seen again (until he is hungry or needs something). since at this point they'd both be pining and denying their feelings for each other i think bakura would be more angry at himself for giving "the enemy" (anzu, aka the pharaoh's "girlfriend" in his head) a possible weak point because in bakura's head there is no place for human feelings and he is just experiencing a side effect of sharing a body with a teenage boy or something (excuses excuses denial etc etc).

anzu is VERY conflicted about this because on one hand... did the evil spirit that's trying to kill her and all her friends (and the rest of the world!) just kind of admitted he likes her??? but on the other hand... oh my god the boy she likes likes her back??? ANZU GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. anyways yes i think she'd also struggle to decide how she wants to tackle this but eventually go seek the feral cat out and like, talk their feelings out or something. which would make bakura want to die a fifth death.

[gnomey22]

Top 5 Therapy-Needers in Failtopia

5.

Chin "Chi" Kid. This girl went through the horrors of saving the entire world twice, got beaten up more than most other characters on both of those journeys, and was placed on the frontlines for an uncountable number of extremely dangerous fights (the primary cause of my previous point). She was locked in a dungeon for a month and had her face implanted on a feral beast, twice in a row for both of those things, and was almost completely alone for three years between these journeys, heavily implying that she's been alone her entire life. This all happens when she's 15-18. What the fuck.

4.

Deko. He may be one of the least remembered character stories in the entire series, but the story he has is horrible. He, a sixteen y/o, decided to submit himself to an unethical experiment to give himself superpowers he felt insecure about lacking, which resulted in him being trapped in the role of an Imp (a literal monster), and bound by the gods to battle for the world with some blond guy he hates. Then, he finds out that there's an alternate universe version of himself who lives a happy and normal life, all because he didn't make the same stupid mistake he himself did. This acts as his 'redemption arc', but if that happened to me, I'd take a very long time to even recover.

3.

Erica. You all know why, but I'll break it down anyways. She has no personal life to speak of, and fully immerses herself in work she doesn't even really enjoy, watching a majority of her coworkers die horribly, partially because she couldn't save them. Then, she joins a somewhat-functional team for the first time, and allows herself to make a genuine connection or two - which are then ripped away from her as soon as the journey ends, leaving her with the same overworking nightmare of a life she had before. This time, she feels the need to abandon a core personality trait, her caution, for the sake of taking out her deeply-bottled-up anger on anything that moves. Because of this, she struggles even harder to make personal connections, and can't bring herself to call almost anyone her friend, or get the concept of death off her mind for two seconds.

2.

Friend. Imagine having a little guy magically attached to your face, by accident, clearly a lost soul who needs all the help he can get. As a Cleric, helping random people is your literal job, and you're a naturally kind person, so of course you care for this stranger! He might be corrupting your mind to increase your aggression, sure, but that's a normal side effect, probably. You miss him when he suddenly disappears. Then, you finally find him again, and he reveals himself as a genocidal demon who intends to reinvent the world for the sake of a revenge plot you can't even comprehend. But you have to comprehend it, because it's partially your fault that he got this far. Not only that, but he's had a clear effect on your mental state, and you start using inanimate objects to cope with his absence, out of sheer desperation. This man has left an irreversible mark on your psyche, and even then, you were entirely expendable to him.

Honourable mentions go to Failboat, Simple Bob, Rose, Orion + Slapo Oopsie, and Bo. Mar does not make the list because he's already been through his three years of therapy, he doesn't need it.

1.

Shrimp. She was abandoned by her father in her vulnerable teenage years, and she has no reason to know he feels bad for it. Due to this lack of protection, many of the awful people in her age range take the opportunity to bully her, mainly over her greatest dream of singing, which they hate that she has. They do everything they can to make her believe her singing talent, one of the only things she has left in her life, is worth nothing, and it gets more than verbal. It's heavily implied that the reason she has an unfixable chipped tooth is because these bullies got violent, and this also gives reason to believe they bullied more than her dreams and talents, they tore into her for her very appearance too. As a result of this, she's left with no option than to abandon her home, just like her dad did, and flee to the unfamiliar surface, hoping she can do anything up there while knowing nothing about it. Her home is behind her now, she has to join a battle party trying to save the entire world just to get by. It's here, where she finds a found family she adores, but they can't replace what she's lost. She still doesn't have a single friend her age, and relies on random adults to survive out here. I don't think it's a coincidence that she has so much fan content, and enough trauma to match it, literally everyone wants this girl to have some happiness.

[khonaker]

Hi

I think ochako is one of the most under utilised and underrated characters. I'm not a fan of her character (no, i DONT hate her). She had so much of potential amd her fight with BK just proved she's more than a pretty face. I'm fully aware of the fact that this show is oversaturated with characters. But let's not forget that she is the main female lead of the show. My biggest issue with her is that she didn't get to do a god damn thing in the Stain arc. She joined the academy with the sole intention of making money, and that's exactly what Stain hates about the hero society. Their monetary outlook. She could have been a part of the arc, the build up was there. She could have shown Stain that yes, while there are heroes who are there solely for the financial gains, that doesn't make them bad people. She all she wanted was to help her family get out of the poor financial situation they were in. Instead, she gets the typical shonen lead heroine treatment- being the love interest and whose sole purpose in life is to be a satellite character to the male lead of the show.

All her effort in the UA sports festival to do her best against Bk, all the desires to make good income as a hero to help her family financially, devolved into a girl who becomes a blushing mess infront of her love interest.

They did her so dirty. She was one of the few female shonen characters who felt like she could be someone in life without having anything to do with matters of the heart.

Also, notice how it's other characters around her who enforce her this whole Deku crush on her. Mina, toga and Aoyama to name a few. These are the characters who constantly remind her of her feelings for deku, thus pushing her further and further away from the plot relevancy.

I find this very annoying and makes me sick to think that a girl with tremendous potential is now relegated to the role of a girl hopelessly in love.

One last question: So many people think she's a terrible person for wanting to make money. I'm like, what? Are you serious? (If you want me to give further explanations I will) but it's the most human and realistic thing to do when you're stuck in a financial rut.

Please let me know and thanks for reading my extremely long post

Cheers

Ooooooooooo Lordy.

(Cracks hands and neck)

First and foremost, I still love Ochako. But I can’t ignore what’s happened to her throughout the series.

Honestly, it’s been ages since I’ve had that exact thought about Ochako and Stain situation! While he had a valid point (that wasn’t further explored, HORIKOSHI) about there being heroes that didn’t have the EXACT same mentality as All Might, her duality of wanting to provide enough money to support her family all the while having the desire to save others for the sake of saving others would be honestly a culture shock to Stain. (Or he may go further into denial, it’s actually hard to say. Guy had a few screws loose.)

But it HONESTLY would have been interesting seeing these two interact! And not to replace anyone the Hosu trio! It honestly would have been cool seeing her trying to use her new Gunhead Martial Arts (though she probably would have been focused on saving Iida as Izuku and Shoto took on the role of the main fighters, but Stain could have also tried to go after them and Uraraka would attempt to hold her own against him.) And we would have had MOST of the Dekusquad there! (Asui had her own internship.) Hiw great would it have been seeing the Dekusquad fighting together! And Ochako going feral protecting Iida!

Yeah, she happened to be more focused only about her crush with Izuku as time went on, which made a lot of her early traits and accomplishments kinda fade away and be forgotten. But for the record, and I still stand by this. A girl having a crush on someone DOESN’T cheapen her in my opinion. It’s something that happens to many teenagers. And some of their interactions I think are handled well, like them talking about wanting to save their respective villains. But other times, yeah, it felt a bit excessive that Horikoshi had to stop and say, “Hey! Hey! Do you remember Ochako has a crush on Izuku?!?” I honestly was looking forward to seeing how she acted after she vowed to put her feelings aside during the provisional license exam. But…Hori just continued to drill it into our faces.

As for the biggest perpetrator of making Ochako only about Izuku, I lay on Toga’s feet. Mina, yeah, she brings up the crush as well, but it’s done more in good fun I feel. And I think Aoyama has done that once. (Now that I think about it, it’s kind of random how he suddenly knew about her crush. He never does it again.)

But Toga? Horikoshi could have used her for something else to make her relevant, but the ONLY thing she had connected to Ochako is their shared crush on Izuku. Others say theirs other themes between them, but I’m sorry. I don’t see it, or believe that it was handled effectively. Ochako had more than just a crush. Like you mentioned, her want to provide for her family. Her fighting spirit and prowess that she showed against Bakugou. She had things that could have been fleshed out more.

Toga was a wha-wha girl that embraced being a remorseless villain and happened to be crushing on the same guy Ochako was crushing on. That’s it. There’s nothing else really about Toga. And she became to Ochako what Bakugou became to Izuku: a detriment to her character and preventing her from becoming something MORE. (Sorry but not really if I sound cynical about Toga. I just got REALLY tired being demanded to care about her. Like some OTHER blonde.)

Speaking of which, your last question? I also never understood this. I get it for a quick joke and stuff like that. Hahaha. But when people were SERIOUS about holding that over Ochako’s head? I was like, “Did you not hear her entire motivation?!?” I was dumbfounded how people could possibly come to that conclusion.

I find it ESPECIALLY interesting NO ONE brings up that BAKUGOU also had the desire to be a hero for money,JUST TO BE RICH AND FAMOUS! But no, shit on Ochako for wanting to take care of her family! Filthy hypocrites. I honestly wish Horikoshi did a better job balancing both her looking out for heroes as well as wanting to have a good paying job for her family. I think both are completely character of her.

Anyways, you gave me a long post, I gave a long response. 😜 But honestly, thanks! I don’t honestly get these and I hope my answers or thoughts are interesting or understandable! Have a good one and thanks again!

@theuntamedangel

[derpcakes]

Okay, I’m never actually going to write this (for reasons I’ll go into in a moment) but do know that a few years ago I was playing with a fanfic idea where a glitched out Holy Grail manifests in rural New South Wales. An ordinary teenager just trying to scrape by ‘til graduation in this tin-pot dairy town is out on a beer run for some crappy country high school party when two supernatural beings crash through the bottle’o wall, one with a spear and one with a pair of shiny, impossibly fast pistols. She survives being caught in the fight but inevitably ends up on her arse looking up at the glowing gunslinger, who says something about being a Heroic Spirit needing a Master. Our heroine then replies “Yeah nah, get fucked”. Nonetheless, she’s dragged into this battle, and the adventure begins from there.

I had most of a cast of Servants laid out: some smartypants mage decides to summon Ned Kelly--an Australian Heroic Spirit if ever there was one, and who is naturally depicted as a hot lady--before remembering that Ned Kelly was famous for being an outlaw who embodies the quintessential Aussie lack of respect for authority. Summoned as the Archer, Kelly has a degree of independence but ultimately needs a human to keep her anchored, hence going “wait, shit” after breaking her own contract, then reluctantly teaming up with our country town hero in the scene above. Since Ned Kelly’s homemade armour is so famous (to the point where a lot of art just depicts the armour, and it’s way more recognisable than his actual face despite photographs of him existing!) the armour would be constantly on, but invisible, in the same way that Arturia obscures Excalibur. Plenty of potential here for dramatic reveals, not to mention the Themes and Motifs. 

I also liked the idea of each Master having a kind of disjointed cultural relationship with their Heroic Spirit, e.g. a young mage who’s grown up as part of the Greek diaspora in Australia summons a hero from Ancient Greek legend; a character whose noble family fled Russia during the revolution (and hasn’t lived there since) summons a staple of Russian folklore like Baba Yaga (as Rider, you know, for her walking house). These old stories are part of these characters’ heritage, but the versions that exist in lore and legend are unrecognisable from anything they’ve known due to the passage of time and the transformation of culture through the immigrant experience. I thought that could be a fun thing to play around with, you know? Especially with the Australian setting.

I also messed around with the idea that someone summons what they think is a Valkyrie (back before they turned up in FGO!) but, in a third act reveal, turns out to actually be Loki in disguise. Loki would be Very Gender and extremely fun as an amoral pseudo-villain who gets into some cheeky chats with Ned Kelly about the way humans mythologise their troublemakers while also shooting them down.

Oh! It was also going to be gay. At least, in terms of the rowdy teen heroine having a female love interest (in the form of a traumatised but deeply powerful girl from an abusive, traditional mage family. She was gonna be full of plants. The heroine was going to throw it all away and go feral to save her in the end, probably punching God in the face to do it. Do you see what I’m doing here? You gotta have the archetypes).

Anyway, while there were some Cool Ideas floating around here, I ultimately shelved and buried this thing. a) it was going to be a SUPER research intensive project, not only in reading up on the myth and history to get the Servants right, but getting my head around the intricacies of Nasuverse worldbuilding not only enough to understand it but enough to mess with it in way that would be satisfying to the reader. These plot bunnies were bouncing around my head when I was in the middle of my Honours year, and heading towards my doctoral studies, so unfortunately, much like real bunnies in Australia, they were deemed an invasive species that would suck up too many of my resources. 

And I was alright with this, because b) I realised that the thing about Fate that makes me want to write fic is its characters, not its world. So staying in the world but taking the characters out felt... well, not like my kind of creative direction. And I would need bucketloads of passion to get me through this thing, because naturally as the story of my very own Grail War it would need to be at least novel-length. And not a thin novel, either...

I thought to myself “If I’m going to do this much worldbuilding and develop this many OCs for a novel-length fic, I may as well be writing my own original fantasy novels”. Which I’m doing! Some ideas that started here have ended up being folded into other, more successful projects. My interest in exploring a trickster god character flowed right into my PhD work, which is largely about trickster god characters; and I’ve nicked and repurposed a few other elements, too, like the idea of a mage family who get their mana from a freaky symbiotic relationship with plants that they grow in their own body. I feel like my angry, take-no-shit, typically Aussie Ordinary Heroine--the girl I placed in Shirou’s archetypal role--will wander into an original project too, since she has a lot of presence and I think would be really fun as a protagonist. 

Anyway--I’m not going to come back to this, but the idea echoes in my brain every now and then, so I figured I’d share it here. What do you all think? If you could devise your own Grail War from the ground up where would you set it and who would you throw in the ring? 

[honeyed-latte]

Fucked Up Pom Lore:

Totally up to yall if you read this, you have been warned, this WILL have emotional whump and it WILL handle very polarizing, kind of gross topics. Pom is an OC close to my heart now BECAUSE of the touchy subjects in her lore.

Its long as hell bc Im a yapper.

Due to how Tumblr works their blacklisting, I wont be censoring the words for the safety of those who have them blacklisted!

So, TW: Manipulation

TW: Religious Trauma

TW: Emotional Whump

TW: Accidental Incest (mentioned, no details)

TW: Suicidal Ideation

TW: Unreliable Narrator

TW: Emotional Cheating

Pom was aware of her family dynamic, Valka never hid that she had a very alive father and brother, but much like her mother Pom was of a mind that Berk was hostile toward dragons— unacceptable.

Thus, Stoick and Hiccup were unworthy of Poms consideration, let alone unworthy of meeting her at all. She is a dragon, they don't like dragons, it's simple math.

But thats not to say she didn't love them as fiercely as she was able, built by Valkas tales of her father and all the sweet stories of her brother. Her mother says the Gods have bigger plans for the women of their family.

—

Hiccup, during his year on Dragons Edge, prone to his love for cartography and adventure, finds himself on a unusually lush island to the north-east of Dragons Edge. It just barely skirts the Dragon Hunters typical stomping grounds and its a beauty.

He fully intends to map it, to scout it's dragon population and maybe make a few friends in the process. He's not fully aware he's being stalked by a human until he's a full day into his work and Toothless's prickly attitude tips him off.

The issue is he can't find them, he can't see anyone at all...

He decides to stay a few days, three maybe, just to get the full island and so far the presence isn't malicious, even Toothless's attitude mellows after the first day.

On the third and final day after waking earlier then usual, he finally manages to spot the person he theorized was stalking him. A young girl, around his age, bathing in the spring at the center of the island. The dragons milling around don't seem threatened or perturbed at all by her as she unobtrusively splashes her unruly, long hair and even with Toothless nudging him judgementally- Hiccup is a teenage boy, he is not immune to a pretty girl naked dripping in water.

He stares. Hard.

He does more then stare, fumbles out a journal and draws the seemingly feral girl. Splashing the water, grinning at the Wooly Howll that slapped her back with it's tail, and when she pulls herself out to dry on the rocks- spread out like a content dragon in the morning light.

She's braiding flowers into her red hair when he cracks a twig and she catches his eyes, a mirror of green. Hiccup runs, because he doesnt really know what else to do?

But he doesn't feel eyes on him for the rest of the day, he feels horribly guilty and creepy for looking and then drawing her, but she was strange and pretty and he's just a man???

He sleeps uneasy and wakes to a familiar flower tucked into his pauldron. Its more charming then alarming.

—

Poms never seen a man up close, Valka does any sort of battle needed with Hunters, and Queen Mala always meets them alone. So seeing the Howl Island suddenly have a stand alone man on it is....weird and exciting, his dragon is even more interesting- a Night Fury, probably the last one alive, what a find.

So she watches, and follows, and learns. His dragon, Toothless, welcomes her at their fire when his man sleeps, they talk. Toothless is a great conversationalist but she attributes that to his rider who also seems chatty.

It's less insulting or terrifying that he snuck up on her while she bathed, if he'd tried to hurt her SunBurn would have crisped him like a fish. But he didnt. So his fear seemed a bit of an overreaction....

So she tried to soothe any worry, putting a little Viking Pom in his armour as he slept, Toothless's wary eyes on her all the while.

—

Duties drag him home but he comes back swiftly, curious and perhaps a bit more.

He spends two weeks on that little island building tenuous trust with the feral girl, watching her free fall and fly with the Typhoomerang that had watched over her that morning, racing them, watching her bond with Toothless, he spends four days convinced she cant speak and doesnt understand him but he talks anyway.

She speaks, a rigid and proper way in fact with the most odd resonance, and tells him he's the only man she's ever seen. So he tells her stories, shows her maps, lets her put flower crowns around his head and stems tied to his fingers like rings.

Like they've known one another forever, he learns about her too. She learned her vocabulary from books, she lives with her mother, she isn't from this island and is only here to help the baby dragons, she was raised with dragons, the scar on her shoulder was from an injured Gronkle she saved.

It feels like a lifetime, just them. They just get one another effortlessly.

Other things take place as well, intimate things, often actually, and Hiccup only realizes they never exchanged names when he's hugging her goodbye for the final time. It feels right to not know, they'll never see eachother again after they part, if he knows he'll want to find her when the war is over- he can't do that. So they remain "Sunhair", what the dragons call her (apparently), and "Man".

Meeting her again two years later, as his mother (his mom!) drags him into a smaller rotunda of ice inside the Alpha's Sanctuary is not the meeting he had hoped for. Neither is he as elated by the acquisition of a sister as he was by his mother.

Valka doesnt ask, Pom doesn't tell, Hiccup ignores the disgust and dread in favour of battle and newfound family- then Stoick dies.

Its all a mess after that. He's Chief and his family was halved yet again, and the one person in the world who he felt was his truest equal is his sister because of course she is, that makes sense doesn't it?

The sudden fraternal feelings war with the memory of a girl he felt he could have loved under different circumstances, he figures Pom feels the same.

She's closer with Eret then him, and he tries not to be jealous about it, but he can't blame her when he can't even meet her eyes somedays.

Is it better if Eret is the brother she wishes for or the lover she can actually attain? Hiccup can't be either of those things.

—

Eret is Pom's bestfriend, only friend really, they're both outsiders watched warily by Berkians and especially Hiccup's friends.

He almost is like a brother, a proper one, one that doesn't stay from her like she's diseased or look pale when she hugs him.

Hiccup doesn't turn her away, he even welcomes her into his home as he did with Valka, but he doesn't seek her out unless he's truly troubled.

Astrid is another hurdle entirely, Pom doesn't like her. She's insubordinate, doesn't show the Queen of her nest respect even though she's to be his wife (thats something Pom avoids thinking about), she is meant to be a pillar of strength and confidence as Hiccup's mate where all can find comfort and instead she hurts them physically or insults them verbally.

Human rules are perturbing, Astrid is allowed all of this and even excused it because..."reasons". In a nest, a real one, Pom would have made her dislike known and they would battle until one perished or was exiled in their failure.

Humans aren't dragons.

So she has to pretend to like the girl to "keep peace" and swallow back all the manners she learned from her people for the sake of her brother.

Her brother.

The brother that won't look in her eyes and won't break fast with her most days, the one that doesn't touch her unless she closes the distance and jumps away as if they're filthy if someone so much as glances them touching hands.

Its all a big joke of Loki's most likely or the Gods are punishing them, its likely her fault. She should have asked his name two years ago.

She debates leaving often, only soothed by Valka's frustration and Erets fretting, she would see herself away from this Tribe thats not hers and a brother that isn't a brother any more then Stoick was her father, she would stay in the Sanctuary like she always did.

--Or perhaps drop into the sea, allow SunBurn to stay safe among a nest with the Alpha.

Pom dreams of death more then she does leaving, more then she dreams of Hiccups hands, more then she has nightmares of Stoicks body and Dragos army and the fury burning in Hiccups eyes.

If she were to die then Hiccup's conscience would be freed and cleared, he'd not worry of others learning the shame he has, Berk would lose nothing and neither would her Dragons. Valka would mourn, surely Eret as well, but they're safe and they're whole and thats what matters. Hiccup, as a Chief and Queen, would rule stronger if she weren't in his shadow.

—

Hiccup disagree's with Pom's feelings even if he doesn't know them.

In fact its an ongoing source of night terrors; Pom leaving, Pom taking the plasma blast that killed his dad (she had actually tried to, and that doesnt help the nightmares), never having found her at all.

He's conflicted before anything else, they both seem to agree not to mention it but he suspects Valka knows, somedays he thinks Eret and Astrid might as well.

Astrid doesn't know and she never will if he has any say, his and Pom's tryst predated their relationship and in a normal circumstance he still wouldn't have told her, it would just be undue pressure.

Its stressful all the time, only finding reprieve in ale and in the early hours of the morning. It was an accident, it hasn't occured since, now that they know who the other is it'll never happen again. That's good, no sacrilegious temptations, except that he feels just as discontent with the idea that they'll never have that connection back as he is with the knowledge that it happened at all.

Loving her and being in love with her both feel damning, but its there all the same.

What a horrific joke this all turned into.

[obaewankenope]

I had to get the bus today (rude) and it was was late so I was panicking, thinking it just wasn't gonna show up like one didn't yesterday... But it did (thank fuck) and the bus driver was a right laugh.

So, picture this:

I'm joking with bus driver about how I'm happy bus arrived even if it was a few mins late bc yesterday one just didn't show and the bus driver jokes back and mentions the app for these buses (because of course there's a specific bus app for the buses ran by this specific company) to track the buses with and see the routes and live locations etc and these two teenage girls (who has been silent until this point) just go feral ranting about the app being the Worst Thing In The World because it's got crappy tracking for bus locations (it does, it's so bad omg) and you always have to just text the number for your stop instead to find out where the fuck your bus is (you do, it's ridiculous).

The driver goes on about the hyperbole of "worst thing in the world" and argues that the Real Worst Thing In The World™ is actually the Fiat Multipla which fair (he told us all to look it up and yeah, who the fuck designed that??? Jfc it's just wrong) and one of the girls went on about how the app was still the worst even as we started listing other examples like wet socks ("nah, I can deal with that, but not thinking my bus is twenty minutes away in X town when it's actually round the corner and I miss it!") and phone signals.

And, hands down, this is a fucking quote, this teenage girl just outright says she'd prefer a Nokia brick to an iPhone Pro 15 Max with 5G because she can't get signal and "I'd be murdered in X because I can't ring anymore but my granddad would screw them over because he never not has signal!"

And I honest to gods fucking started laughing hearing these two teenage girls, probably 14 or 15, waxing lyrical about Nokia brick phones and their amazing phone signal and how touch they are all because one of them had forgotten their phone one day and had to borrow a "flip phone with real buttons that you have to press like four times to get one letter" on it to look up bus times.

I think I pulled a muscle tbh.

* The Fiat Multipla is a really ugly car tho, the bus driver is definitely right about that.