#god please help me this series is killing me

[kentuckyfriedmegumi]

GEGE!!!!!! DROP MORE JJK BASEBALL SCENES!!!! AND MY LIFE. IS YOURS!!!!!!

silly jjk baseball sketches that i did instead of work, oops

[potatobugz]

i feel as if im going mad so im going to just put this out here. real quick. movieunleashers starters ramble.

i cant stop thinking about how mudkip broke down in that one scene in "Typomaniac," when Chespin called him mean. for a second he lets his mask slip a little bit and to me he just... acts his age. he starts crying and calls chespin mean back. maybe im just hyperfocusing on this one detail but mudkip is about 12 years old.

and that just makes me wonder what happened in this guys life that brought him to where he is now. and it makes it all the more tragic how his whole world revolves around chespin, but he is the one bringing him the most pain. and how young he was when he died.

there is a large theme of growing up in "Rare Candy." the characters ages are emphasized in that particular episode, and one of the main conflicts is fennekin wanting to evolve faster.

the thing about characters in these stories is that they're not allowed to just be kids, to have a childhood. so many bad things happen to them. like. mudkips whole, Everything. fennekin when she was famous in typomaniac, or dealing with her own insecurities/pressure from society about her relationship w chespin. and chespin always having to shoulder his friends problems & always somehow managing to stay positive despite everything.

why cant they just. play video games. eat ice cream or something. go to the movies

at the end of the day, i think both mudkip and fennekin are characters who grew up too fast. by distancing himself from them, chespin refused to follow in their footsteps and just wanted to stay a kid.

good for him.

[welcometogrouchland]

*twirling my hair* do you like cassandra cain? if not, do u have a moment to hear about our lord and saviour cassandra cain?

CASSANDRA CAIN MY LOVE!!! She's definitely the batgirl I've read the most in terms of full issues, the first 30-ish issues of her solo by Kelly Puckett Scott Peterson and Damion Scott had me hooked and I binged them but fell off after Horrocks came on (nothing against him, he was just given an editorial mandate to make the book more romance focused and it turned me off because it felt so ooc for Cass to me lol. I do own some of the issues he wrote tho! I like the ones with art by Rick Leonardi). I'm not really caught up with modern comics (ish??) And I'm not reading anything dedicatedly but I hear she's in a new original book teaming up with a magic user? Neat! Good for her. I love her in the shadow of the batgirl graphic novel (IT'S SO GOOD)

[maerrine]

man i am a little bummed about how this means that all this time we thought dazai was struggling for the first time was actually all just faked though. i hope we get to see dazai out of his depth at least once before the end of the series.

[gffa]

Jedi culture & community fics, my beloved! They're a bit of a rare breed for what you're specifically looking for, specifically focusing on positive Jedi worldbuilding, so if anyone has genfic recs outside of the ones I know, please feel free to add them! But these should help scratch that itch for you, each of them has at least some focus on Jedi philosophy or how Jedi interact with each other or the lessons they teach! It's been awhile since I've read some of them, so there might be some that aren't quite as in-line with how I see the Jedi these days, but they're all ones I felt portrayed them pretty positively and they're all genfic (except one that I made an exception for) and all really lovely fics I remember enjoying for the Jedi worldbuilding aspects! And there are some that will make you absolutely melt with how much you love these characters and their beautiful culture, because by god if canon's not going to give us as much detail as we want, fandom will step up. And fandom made sure to not just focus on the disaster lineage--we love Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Ahsoka, we always want more of them, please don't stop writing Jedi worldbuilding with them!--but also Mace and Yoda and Quinlan and Qui-Gon and even some Jedi OCs get some love in these fics, which makes me want to explode with joy to see! So, come cry about how much we love the Jedi with me, I WILL GIVE YOU A CRAPLOAD OF FIC TO READ. STAR WARS & JEDI CULTURE & WORLDBULDING RECS YOU'LL FIND HERE:

NOVEL AND NOVELLA LENGTH

MID-LENGTH

SHORT AND YET SO GOOD-LENGTH

NOVEL AND NOVELLA LENGTH: ✦ Remedial Jedi Theology by MarbleGlove, obi-wan & anakin & jedi & cast, 51.3k     Let us consider the fact that the Jedi Order is a monastic religious organization based out of a temple, with five basic tenets of faith. ✦ Festival of Light by dendral, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, 8.7k     During his first year at the Jedi Temple, Anakin learns that even the Jedi celebrate holidays. ✦ Out with Lanterns by SkyeBean, ahsoka & mace & jedi & clones & cast, 312.5k     In another universe, Jedi Masters Plo Koon and Depa Billaba decide a Padawan could do Mace some good. It takes a while, but he eventually agrees. When he takes Ahsoka Tano as his Padawan, Mace knows that he's broken through a Shatterpoint and changed the course of a life. How, he doesn't know. ✦ eat well; be well by gingerbeer, rainsoaked_benevolence (oceans_bluem), obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & yoda & depa & shaak & quinlan & aayla & cast, 18.6k     Or, (almost) all of the Jedi High Councilors (plus Ahsoka) gather to eat dinner together. ✦ Supreme Chancellor Obi-Wan Kenobi by stonefreak, obi-wan & anakin & padme & ahsoka & palpatine & yoda & quinlan & cody & cast, 126.3k wip     By an old Republic law, all members of the Jedi High Council are senators in the Galactic Senate, and can thus be voted in as chancellor. A Senator from a less prominent planet has had enough of Chancellor Palpatine's incompetence and calls for a Vote of No-Confidence and the installation of Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi as Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic. This one action becomes the catalyst that changes the direction of the galaxy. ✦ Pragmatics of the Jedi by aroacejoot, ghostwriterofthemachine, loosingletters, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & jedi, 31.3k     A series of fanfiction exploring the consequences and results of the Jedi having their own language, and speaking it still. ✦ light by loosingletters, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & mace & jedi, 56.1k     Anakin Skywalker is a Jedi and being a part of their Order means that he is protected and accepted. The war is over and the Republic has to recover from the crimes of the Sith Lord, the Jedi have to figure out what it means to be peacekeepers again and the Clones have to learn how to be more than expendable soldiers. ✦ When Darkness Seems to Hide This Place by IllyanaA, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & kanan & ocs & cast, 94.9k wip     After killing three of the Jedi Order's best and brightest, Palpatine's fight with Jedi Master Mace Windu goes shorter than expected. Afraid he's lost his chance at recruiting a new apprentice, Sidious unleashes Order 66 across the galaxy, but, per their programming, the Clone Army is not to harm Anakin Skywalker. After witnessing the most painful loss he's ever experienced and injured at the hands of his captors, Anakin is ready to die like the rest of the Jedi, though not before getting his vengeance.

✦ Knightrise by Deviant_Accumulation, obi-wan & yoda & satine & ahsoka & asajj & cast, 89.4k wip     "Strong enough to fight the Sith Lord, you are not.“ And just like that the fight drained out of Obi-Wan, the barely scraped together agitation running out of him like water from a broken glass. He looked at Yoda, the other Master already hobbling towards one of the back exits, his presence burning with focus, obviously expecting Obi-Wan to follow. ✦ Make a Brand New End by Batsutousai, obi-wan & anakin & feemor & qui-gon & yoda & mace & dooku & jedi, 118.6k     Feemor, Qui-Gon Jinn's first padawan, did not survive Order 66, but the Force granted him a boon: A chance to go back to days before Qui-Gon's death. He doesn't know why the Force picked him to remember that terrible future, but he's going to do what he can to change it. And if he can heal the rift fallen between himself and Qui-Gon, and finally get the chance to know Obi-Wan, well, he's not about to turn that down. ✦ Unexpected Awakening (The Rewrite) by Rhiw, obi-wan & qui-gon & bruck & feemor & cast, time travel, 135.1k wip     The life of General Kenobi is cut short at the hands of his Padawan, but the sight that greets his eyes upon awakening is not that of blinding light of the Force, but the Jedi Temple he knew when he was still a youth. As he struggles to understand the path laid out before him, Obi-Wan unwittingly captures the attention of a singularly unusual Temple Guard, and that of a reluctant Qui-Gon Jinn. ✦ No Rest for the Weary by orphan_account, obi-wan & anakin & jedi, 61k     Needing a break from life at the Jedi Temple, Obi-Wan Kenobi and his apprentice, Anakin Skywalker, visit a Jedi AgriCorps settlement on the Midrim planet of Helia. There they encounter new friends, new enemies and have new adventures, all while attempting to navigate their sometimes turbulent relationship as Master and Padawan. ✦ The Moments That Time Remembered by CallToMuster, obi-wan & mace & vokara & bant & quinlan & garen & depa & jedi, 82.4k     Obi-Wan’s first memory was not his own. Rather, it was a vision steeped in darkness and flashes of red and choking heat and you were my brother and the harsh crash of lightsabers striking one another. He woke up sobbing in the arms of the crèchemaster, Master Kitaddik, who was hushing him and gently stroking the top of his head with her furry hands. Obi-Wan hid his face in the soft folds of her tunic and, still crying, fell back asleep. The first time Obi-Wan collapsed due to a vision was not long after that. [Or: in all the various iterations of Obi-Wan Kenobi’s life, the Force spoke to him. But in this one, it never stopped.] ✦ Starrunner by orpheus_under_starlight, obi-wan & jedi & oc, 80.2k wip     In what would have been the year 17 BBY, Supreme Chancellor Sheev Palpatine is found slumped over his desk, dead to rights and emitting a foul odor. The coroners declare the body victim to a heart attack and the smell a result of a lack of a timely embalming—a bit of bowels humor, the head coroner says with a nervous laugh when interviewed by the Galactic Enquirer.

MID-LENGTH: ✦ 飽了嗎? | Have you eaten your fill? by virdant, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & qui-gon & quinlan & yoda & dooku & mace & bant & jedi, 13k     The Force is the first language that Obi-Wan learned to speak, the brush of one mind against another. But food is the second language that Obi-Wan learned to speak with, and he talks, he talks, he talks. A collection of fics about food and how food is an articulation of love. ✦ We Will Abide by naberiie, plo & shaak, 10.3k     Light. Dark. Balance. Beneath the Jedi Temple, far below the chaos of Coruscant's Galactic City, ancient halls and corridors sleep in silent darkness. Padawans Shaak Ti and Plo Koon are determined to explore them. ✦ What Is My Heritage? by Marnie, qui-gon & yoda, 7.7k     Qui-Gon, age 13, tries to find a place to belong. ✦ Coming Home by Marnie, qui-gon & yoda & dooku, 18.1k     A story telling how Qui-Gon comes to be Dooku's apprentice. ✦ Master by CJinn, obi-wan & anakin, 27.5k     Obi-Wan Kenobi had always wanted to become a Jedi Knight. What he didn't expect was to become a Master merely days after his own Master died. Adapting to his new role as the mentor and Master of the quite unusual Padawan Anakin Skywalker became a bumpy road.

✦ into the statue that breathes by spoonks, obi-wan & feemor & cin & cast, 8.5k     The night watch in the garden was supposed to be the calmest of them all. No mischievous Padawans “sneaking” in or out, or ne’er-do-well civilians conducting “business” around the lower-level entrances that they didn’t know existed. No the gardens was still, and it was like time was frozen in ice that slowly melted away with the rising of the sun. A slow drip, drip— Drip. Immediately Feemor turned towards the central waterfall. Someone was standing there. Whoever they were, they were small and moved through katas with their hands open like a greeting. ✦ The Cave by Ria Talla (ronia), anakin & ahsoka & cast, time travel, 10k     Ahsoka Tano, post-Star Wars Rebels/? And there was something else, more important, though Ahsoka found herself loath to do it. Her lightsabers drawn, deep in the labyrinth formed by the stone warriors and the crumbled temple. Yet the words broke certain into her mind. Your eyes can deceive you. Her heart pounded, as though warning her otherwise. But Ahsoka withdrew her sabers, and closed her eyes. Rather than her weapons, she let the Force be her light. ✦ A Candle in the Night by phoenixyfriend, anakin/luminara & obi-wan, time travel, 12k     In which Luminara finds a heavily injured Jedi, nurses him back to health, and falls in love. Then they get back to the real world, and she just can't figure him out... ✦ Found Clan by silvergryphon, boba & ocs & obi-wan & anakin & cast, 25.3k wip     After the Battle of Geonosis, a Jedi Healer discovers young Boba Fett mourning the loss of his father. Not about to leave a ten-year-old boy on his own, she promptly adopts him with the full collusion of her Padawan. ✦ the heart of kyber by outpastthemoat, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & depa & kanan & jedi, 32.7k     Tales of the Jedi: Stories about lightsabers, masters, and apprentices. ✦ Stars of Tatooine by Be_Right_Back, ahsoka & mace & kanan & obi-wan & rex & cast, 10.5k     After the end of the world, Ahsoka more or less kidnaps a child, has to air some old grievances, and tries to find whatever peace the universe can still offer. All paths in the Force lead home, eventually. ✦ The Uses of a Sandwich by Laura Kaye (laurakaye), obi-wan & qui-gon & yoda & cast, 17.6k     A few months after being taken as a Padawan, Obi-Wan Kenobi faces a challenge: meeting his Master's first apprentice. ✦ Familes Found by fyrefly, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & padme & mace & plo, 8.2k     In a universe where "The Wrong Jedi" never happened, the war ends under different circumstances and perhaps everyone will get a chance at a happy ending after all.

SHORT AND YET SO GOOD-LENGTH: ✦ The Mathematics of Repair by panharmonium, obi-wan & anakin & cast, 4.6k     For raw teachers and rough-edged students building in the rubble: tiny steps are enough, provided they carry you in the right direction. Immediately post TPM, in short snippets. ✦ The Living Force; Parables for Padawans by glorious_clio, obi-wan & cast, 6.1k     Since infancy, younglings are taught the Jedi Code, “Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force.” Obi-Wan Kenobi learns these tenets backwards and forwards again. But even as a child, he is interested in nuance. And so his teachers tell him parables. ✦ A Jedi's Cloak ImperialKatwala, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & cody & rex, 6.4k Jedi cloaks are made for children. Obi-Wan Kenobi is a year and a half old when he first sees this principle in action. He is fourteen, twenty-five, twenty-nine, and thirty-six when he gets a reminder.     Or: Jedi cloaks are weird. Here's a series of events showing why they're made that way. ✦ the master, the padawan, the Force by skatzaa, kanan & depa. 1.4k     Caleb expects things to be different after Master Depa takes him as her padawan, but really, it feels like nothing really changes. ✦ For the Future of the Order by thetorontokid, obi-wan & qui-gon & cast, 3.9k     There are important lessons to be found in the Jedi Temple creche.

✦ Memories of Peace by Margan, obi-wan & clones, 2k     It's not quite flash training, but the Clones are used to learning fast. It helps that this is something that they actually look forward to learning, to putting into practice. Obi-Wan teaches the Clones how to make dumplings in the middle of war. ✦ Liberosis by Be_Right_Back, anakin & mace & yoda & jedi, 2.2k     The war is over, the Sith are gone, and there is now Anakin Skywalker's secret marriage to deal with. While love is a wonderful thing, some truths are hard to face, and letting go is the destiny of all Jedi. Or: the Council and Anakin clash. It doesn't go as terribly as it could have. ✦ Accepting Emotion by LazarusII, obi-wan & ahsoka, 1.1k     Dealing with the stress and anxiety of being a prospective Padawan, Ahsoka Tano struggles to manage her emotions. Obi-Wan Kenobi finds her practicing in the dojo, confidence in tatters. His words make all the difference. ✦ A Long, Long Time Ago by ruth baulding, dooku & qui-gon + qui-gon & obi-wan + obi-wan & anakin + anakin & ahsoka, 5.8k     A wisdom tale handed passed down through the generations poses troublesome questions for a line of masters and Padawans, from Dooku to Ahsoka Tano.

✦ Duet by Silver Sky 1138, oc & cin, 2.3k     Asha Scarsi, the Jedi Padawan who feels the Force through music, isn't half as good at lightsaber combat as she is at singing and mindtricks. So she's a little nervous when Battlemaster Cin Drallig calls her to the training room after class. ✦ The One Where Anakin Tries to Be Serious by GirlwithCurls98, anakin & ahsoka, 1k     Even though they're fighting a war, Anakin finds the time to lead his apprentice through one of the Jedi's sacred ceremonies. ✦ Obi-Wan and the Force by AwayOHumanChild, obi-wan & cast, ~1k     One of the first things Jedi Initiates learn is that everyone experiences the Force differently.

✦ Night Shift at the Temple by ReneeoftheStars, oc jedi & cast, 1.8k     A Jedi Temple Guard sees all, speaks to few, and has attachments to no one. One must be prepared for any threats that may arise, especially at night, while most of the Temple sleeps. ✦ The Orchards by Raven_Knight, obi-wan & qui-gon & cast, 3.6k     When young Obi-Wan Kenobi is injured on a previous mission, Qui-Gon Jinn refuses to accept further off-planet missions until his Padawan's recovery. Yoda assigns the pair an in-Temple mission of utmost importance while Obi-Wan heals. Master and Padawan welcome the change of pace. ✦ Tipping Point by Ria Talla (ronia), adi gallia & finis valorum & eeth koth, 3.3k     "I believe that if what's happening on Naboo is allowed to continue, the other member systems will wonder what they owe to a Republic that can no longer protect them." ✦ A Personal Touch by DragonHoardsBooks, obi-wan & anakin, 6.2k     New jedi padawan Anakin Skywalker realizes that there is more to being a jedi then he tought. Discovering a completely new culture will take time and effort, but maybe he'll make some friends along the way.

✦ Jedi Parables by Peppermint_Shamrock, jedi, 5.8k     Values are often passed down generation to generation through stories, parables, and fables. What stories might the Jedi teach their children? ✦ Songs for Little Jedi by soft_but_gremlin, mace & jedi, ~1k     The initiates are having nightmares, so Mace sings a lullaby to comfort them. ✦ a thin thread of hope by wrennette, shaak & clones, ~1k     Shaak Ti introduces some cadets to one of her favourite crafts, under the guise of training. ✦ rah kat by js71, obi-wan & anakin & aayla, 1.6k     "Aay’shee," Obi-Wan murmurs into her ear, rocking her gently, like when jaieh was off on a mission she couldn’t go on, so her jaieh-raheniel would take turns having her over at their apartments. ✦ Lessons on Attachment by Siri_Kenobi12, obi-wan & anakin/padme & cast, 2.7k     "Anakin once told me that a Jedi is actually encouraged to love." She said after Obi-Wan had settled. ✦ Straw Dogs by Cymbidia, obi-wan & jedi & cast, 2.9k     An old Jedi Master imparts some wisdom concerning Mercy, Balance, and the Will of the Force to young Padawan Obi-wan Kenobi and a gaggle of other younglings. It is a lesson that haunts Obi-wan for the rest of his life. ✦ Refractions of Light by Independence1776, ezra & kanan, 1.3k     Kanan celebrates a Jedi holiday with Ezra.

✦ The grand outing by Ingata, dooku & sifo-dyas & obi-wan & bant & garen & reeft & yoda & cast, 4.5k     Eight younglings and two Jedi masters on a field trip. What could possibly go wrong? ✦ A Short Break by Peppermint_Shamrock, luke & yoda, ~1k     Luke complains about his training, and asks about Jedi training of old. ✦ we are made of our longest days by bereft_of_frogs, obi-wan & anakin & cast, 4.4k     Two years after the events of The Phantom Menace, Obi-Wan and his new apprentice are called to a remote moon to fetch a baby who’s showing signs of a rare, unique power. On their journey home, Obi-Wan reflects on the last child he brought to the Temple and catches a faint glimpse of three possibly entwining futures. ✦ yellow, you're a dreamer by nightdotlight, jocasta & anakin (& obi-wan), 2.6k     Normally, it wouldn’t be unusual, but— Jocasta did not earn her post without listening, and from where she stands in the aisle, gaze fixed upon the back of the young child’s shaking shoulders, she can hear a sniffle reverberate around the space. There’s a child curled up in the corner of the Archives— and they’re crying. ✦ once upon a time (a long, long time ago) by thebitterbeast, barriss & mace & shaak & ki-adi & bacara & trilla & cere, 2.3k     The Jedi love children. Children love stories. This changes some things. ✦ not the place that I was born in (doesn't mean it's not the place where I belong) by ghostwriterofthemachine, obi-wan & anakin, 5k     “What were you consulting Master Obi-Wan about?” “Tea!” says the other Padawan brightly. “I’m performing a tea ceremony for my Master, one that originates from her home world. It’ll be the first time I sit foveo with her!” She says that word— foveo— as if it should mean something to Anakin. It does not. ✦ A Friend Indeed by ExtraPenguin, plo & ahsoka, 3.3k     After their rescue of the colonists of Kiros, Ahsoka Tano's Master asks for her to be sent on a mission away from the front. She ends up being sent to the Deep Core with Master Plo Koon to investigate one of the first known locations of the Jedi Order, since abandoned. ✦ In which we burn bodies as bridges by GraceEliz, obi-wan & ahsoka & depa & kanan & ezra, 1.4k     Lineage mantras, and the processing of grief. ✦ Five Times Mace was There for Obi-Wan, and One Time Obi-Wan Returned the Favour by wrennette, obi-wan & mace, 4k     five of the many times Mace Windu offered Obi-Wan comfort over the years, and one of the many times Obi-Wan returned the favour

✦ as the dust settled around us by thebitterbeast, finn & jedi, 5.2k     Bravery has never been the absence of fear. Prompt: There is no emotion, there is peace. ✦ Adi Gallia, Master of the Order by Perspicacia, adi & jedi, 7.2k wip     Palpatine didn't expect it. It was too soon for that in his plans: which Jedi would have left the Temple under assault? But Adi had. Ashes in her heart, she had left the younglings and the elders and the wounded for her duty to the galaxy, choosing to stop the Sith instead of protecting her people. ✦ “The Padawan Chooses The Master” by lurkingcrow, obi-wan & anakin & cast, 3.6k     prompt: AU - The Jedi say “The Padawan Chooses The Master” Qui Gon lives, Obi Wan is very preoccupied, and Anakin is put into the creche as an Initiate to learn what he can until Qui Gon wakes up from his coma and gets yelled at by the Council. In the meantime, Anakin meets other Jedi Masters and when the Council asks him who he wants to be his teacher, his answer isn’t Qui Gon. Instead it’s *insert your fav Jedi here* ✦ The Only Home We Know by ReneeoftheStars, katooni & petro & ganodi & byph & gungi & zaft & cast, character death, child death, 2.4k     The Jedi Temple is under attack. Determined to fight for their home, younglings Katooni, Petro, Zatt, Ganodi, Byph, and Gungi make their way to aid the Jedi Masters in defense of the Temple. But the situation is far graver than they expected. ✦ Obi-Wan and the Force by AwayOHumanChild, obi-wan & cast, ~1k     One of the first things Jedi Initiates learn is that everyone experiences the Force differently. ✦ The One Where Anakin Tries to Be Serious by Mini_and_Might, anakin & ahsoka, 1k     Even though they're fighting a war, Anakin finds the time to lead his apprentice through one of the Jedi's sacred ceremonies. Might become part of a series of missing scenes from the Clone Wars. ✦ Markings by wabbajack, ahsoka & plo, 1.6k     In which it is revealed that Master Plo Koon has always had a difficult time putting his foot down when faced with his Little 'Soka. ✦ The First Trial by Raven_Knigh, obi-wan & qui-gon, 2k     Accompanied by his Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, young Obi-Wan Kenobi undergoes his first trial and rite as a Padawan Learner on the frozen planet of Ilum.

✦ Arrival by CJinn, obi-wan & yoda & jedi, 2.6k     Little Obi-Wan was only a few days old when he was brought to the Jedi Temple. His arrival caused some confusion among the Jedi. ✦ The Spire by skatzaa, obi-wan & jedi, 2.4k     The galaxy was on the brink of war, and Obi-Wan Kenobi had been assigned a new room. ✦ Room Arrangements by skatzaa, obi-wan & anakin, 2.2k     Anakin has some concerns about room arrangements at the Temple. Obi-Wan does his best to reassure him. ✦ Lineage by virdant, obi-wan & anakin & yoda & jedi, 1.5k     Anakin is new to the temple, and he does not yet understand that these are his brothers and sisters, his cousins, his uncles and aunts. He does not know yet, but he will learn, Obi-Wan thinks. ✦ A Discussion of Choices by Peppermint_Shamrock, luke & mace, 2k     Mace Windu has traveled the galaxy since the fall of the Republic, keeping out of the Empire's sight and teaching where he can. Upon the request of a ghost of an old friend, Mace finds himself instructing Luke Skywalker, who is still reeling from the truth of Vader's identity. ✦ Emotion is our Shared Tongue by virdant, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & quinlan & jedi, 2.1k     There are thousands of different species, with different languages and voices and hands, but what all Jedi have in common is the Force, and with the Force, they have language. ✦ To Know by Armin_05, obi-wan & anakin & shmi & kitster & fives & cast, 4.8k     Nearly all Jedi love learning. Anakin Skywalker is no different. Or, how Anakin found a love of learning and shared it with others. ✦ Shatterpoints and Students by soft_but_gremlin, mace & depa, ~1k     Depa always has shatterpoints hovering around her.

✦ Home-onym by virdant, jedi, 1.1k     Jedi younglings, like any other children, enjoy playing. Playing with lightsabers and playing with words. ✦ Threaded Lineage by Pandora151, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & kanan & ezra & luke & rey, 2.9k     The journey of a single river stone through many generations of Jedi, allowing the Jedi of the old and the Jedi of the future to be threaded together. ✦ the river and the rock by nightdotlight, anakin & luminara, 1.8k     Lightsabers clash, and Luminara Unduli holds her ground. She doesn’t move, doesn’t lock her muscles, just makes herself an immovable object and lets her opponent strain against the lock. ✦ Five Meditations of Jedi Depa Billaba by skatzaa, depa & mace & yoda & kanan & kit, 5.3k     What is says on the tin. (Plus one more, for good measure.)

[michellesneptune]

HOW THE MOON SIGNS ACT WHEN THEY LOVE YOU pt. 1

disclaimer: forgive me if the series doesn’t cover all twelve signs, but i don’t think i’ve known enough people to speak about everyone’s way of loving. please be patient🤗

aries moon/1H

ooooh those little devils🔥😈 you can see the mischievous twinkle in their eyes. they’re children of Ares - the god of war! when they speak of their loved ones it feels as though they’re ready to kill for them any minute, only waiting for the right (or any😂) reason.

(just my observation, please don’t come at me) i believe that these natives are prone to being more loyal, less selfish and flaky than aries venus. aries is known to be 'the baby' of the zodiac, valuing independence and self-fulfilment greatly. however, i’ve noticed aries moons to be devoted af!! you will never catch them bad mouthing a friend or a partner.

also, from my experience, both placements like to fight, however aries venus often does it for own enjoyment, the initial chase turns them on. as for aries moons, they’re more steady. they would go to great lengths for friends and partners. you can call them in the middle of the night and ask the craziest favor, they WILL come and help.

(please keep in mind that i mean unevolved aries venuses that still have a lesson or two to learn!)

PS. they love to be treated like the center of your world, please give them attention💕

taurus moon/2H

hmmmm how do i put it… 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍! i will say that i am biased bc my boyfriend is one and the way he’s attentive, always asks about the details of my day, pays attention to my routines and shows love through acts of service🥹 you’ve probably heard the rumours and they’re true. taurus moons make the best cooks ever. and i don’t mean putting together a couple of cheap pancakes, nuh uh. their sharp senses only let them buy the best quality ingredients and cook with great care. bonus points if they prepare a dish that they know is your favourite!

i will say though, they are not the most verbal lovers. but when they’re in, they mean it. when they say they love you, it becomes a fact so obvious that they don’t feel the need to repeat it over and over. they like to settle into a routine, so don’t expect them to be flaky, send mixed signals and stir things up just to feel something/for fun (sag moons cough cough😅😅).

they also seem brutal sometimes. but i believe it’s because they see honesty as the highest form of trust. they want to feel comfortable with you. they value silence, too. they’re the type to show you their appreciation not by telling you how perfect you are but by actually putting in the work to show you your value and show that they’re worthy of being by your side.

lastly, their homes are their sanctuaries, a reflection of their feelings. usually beautiful and they look for someone worthy of letting in, to match their belongings. they get a rep for being possessive and stubborn, nevertheless with the right person they can make a sacrifice and at least try to change their ways😂😂

virgo moon/6H

okay so i know they’re said to be critical, demanding, neurotic etc but hear me out. virgo is a mutable sign, ruled by mercury and in true mutable fashion they DO get wild, fun and unhinged lol. as a virgo moon myself i am well aware of the fact that i often act like i’ve got a stick up my ass. but when i get closer to you i want it all: karaoke nights, fast car rides, spontaneous trips! sometimes i even take those things to the extreme!

they’re also said to have the highest standards. and while i imagine it’s partly true, i believe that this placement is all about accepting the biggest, weirdest quirks of your s/o (as well as 6th house synastry!).

besides, i think that we get more so insecure and self-critical in relationships, analyzing the f outta our partners, wondering whether we’re meeting their demands! we’re about the overall quality of the partnership and just want it to be perfect🥺 we’re also quite anxious and require lots of reassurance.

lastly, everyone knows it: virgo moons are like the final boss of small acts of service lol. vacuuming your flat, folding your clothes. they notice the smallest things that could improve your life and happily do them for you!

capricorn moon/10H

this one is tricky. they remind me a bit of taurus but more rough in a sense that they probably won’t pamper you with luxurious baths and gourmet food but they will do things like pay your rent, get you a job or buy a car😂. i’ve noticed them to be a bit grumpy sometimes, definitely not the softest lovers.

they’re up to giving some tough love. pushing you into a scary path that they know will be rewarding in the end. teaching you that even in the hardest lessons of saturn there is light. they’re not the most cheerful on a daily basis but - surprisingly- they are the ones that keep calm in the face of crises. they’re like okay we can’t do anything about it now let’s appreciate what we do have and focus on what we can change.

it’s because they know all to well how karma is. they had to learn it the hard way which made them so strong and resilient.

what i’ve personally noticed: they will stick by your side no. matter. what. this isn’t always a good thing as sometimes it’s best to walk away but if you’re expecting a cap moon to give up on you, don’t.

i also feel like they’re used to being the oldest sibling, the mom friend etc. please take care of them from time to time!

that is all i have for you! thank you for reading💕 i wish all of you lots and lots of love💋 see ya

~Michelle

[harunayuuka2060]

WHB Series #1 (Cont.)

Michael: I've succeeded in killing Asmodeus. Now, fulfill your promise.

MC: *nonchalantly; looks a bit mature now since 10 years have already passed*

MC: *examines the head*

MC: Hm... This looks like him, alright.

MC: *looks at him dead in the eye* Did you get lazy so you decided to create a replica of his head, huh?

Michael: ...

Gabriel and Raphael: *chuckle*

Michael: I’ve endured ten years of torment in Abaddon. Surely, you can be considerate enough to let this one pass.

Gabriel: A promise is a promise, Michael.

Raphael: If you can’t accomplish a single simple task, you have no right to ask for god’s hand in marriage.

Michael: ...

Michael: *kneels before MC, crawling towards them with a sultry grace before wrapping his arms around their legs*

Michael: Please? I'll be a good husband to you.

MC: *feeling grossed out* You're making me want to chop off my own legs.

Michael: That would be perfect. If you can’t walk, I can force you to stay with me.

MC: ...

Gabriel and Raphael: ...

Gabriel and Raphael: This insolent—

MC: *feeling sleepy*

Foras: MC...

MC: Hey there, Foras. Does Leviathan have a message for me?

Foras: No, I'm just here to check up on you.

Foras: How's your health recently?

MC: As you can see, I'm doing well.

Foras: ...

Foras: But MC... Your name appeared in Lemegeton.

MC: Yeah, I know about that.

Foras: !!!

Foras: MC, you're the—

MC: The vessel. And the owner is coming back, and he's expecting that everything will be in order.

MC: Including my punishment for the ungodly behavior I've done on earth.

Foras: Still, those were helpful to humans—

MC: I abused my authority. That's all there is, not that I have any regrets.

Foras: I see... In that case—

MC: I'll be spending my remaining few years with Michael.

Foras: ...

Foras: Pardon?

Satan: They have something in mind. I could feel it.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: The descendant of Solomon is destined to die within the next fifteen years.

Satan: That's impossible; they're healthy.

Lucifer: It isn't if god will truly return.

Satan: ...

Asmodeus: I'm calling dibs to their soul.

Leviathan: You're not in contract with them.

Asmodeus: Oh, but I'm technically their husband, remember? They still bear my mark as of this moment.

Asmodeus: I'm certain they wouldn't mind becoming my trophy spouse.

Belphegor: Fuck off.

Mammon: Hate to drop this on everyone, but they've already entrusted their soul to Lucifer.

Lucifer: ...

Satan: Wait—WHAT?!

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: Oh.

Satan: IT'S NOT ME?!

Mammon: Don't worry, there'll be next time; if they continue the bloodline.

Beelzebub: Which is doubtfully.

'Child, I was merely testing you—I never meant to punish you for aiding Hell and delivering rightful punishments.'

MC: Nah, I'm tired.

'...Very well.'

[devotedfem]

→ Darkweb

Synopsis: In your 4 years working for the FBI you never witnessed something like this. An unknown hacker that stole all of your confidential files has been blackmailing you for weeks. The only thing he asked in return to not leak confidential information, it's a "date" with you out of the city.

Jeon Jungkook x f. reader

Genre: criminal au | yander-ish

Tags: criminal Jungkook, detective reader, chasing, violence, yandere Jungkook, stalking, stalker Jungkook, hacking, kidnapping, delusional Jungkook.

From the series masterlist; The chasing.

The burning feeling of rage and frustration run hot in your veins. Your files were hacked, all of them.

Every time you try to open a file, a mocking notification shows up:

Accept my date pretty please?

That was what anger you so bad, because the person who is doing all of this just wants a date with you and that was ridiculous and absurd. Couldn’t they ask you like a normal person instead of stealing confidential information? It wasn’t that hard.

“Fucking creep,” you groaned sighing deeply, already tired of dealing with this.

This information was delicate, and the government would arrest you or even kill you if these files fall into the wrong hands. It was something that genuinely frightened you, this wasn’t a game for you, this was serious but that psycho was playing mind games with you, and for what? For a simple date? There must be a bait, definitely.

You tried again to open or close a file, and the same notification shows up, but three times.

Accept my date pretty please?

“Oh my god! Okay you fucking annoying creep!” you shouted, clicking on the accept bottom.

And then, nothing happened.

You snorted rolling your eyes, but your breath hitched the moment that the screen of your laptop went completely dark, and then, another notification shows up, telling you the direction of your date, but what scared you was the message below it:

Don’t be late and go ALONE, or you’ll regret it😊

Your hand trembled a little when you closed the notification, but you felt relieved when you opened your files without problem this time.

But that uneasy feeling was heavy in your stomach, something was really off with this person. But you weren’t a coward and neither a bad detective, so you will endure this.

Hopefully you will end alive.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

The last thing you remember, it’s sitting in a restaurant waiting for your stalker before you felt a sting at the back of your head and everything turning black.

You groaned with pain, blinking slowly to open your eyes. Your heart stopped and your veins run ice cold at the sight before you. You were in a dark warehouse, with your legs and wrists bounded, sitting in front of a table with candles and food.

Was this your date?

The realization frightened you, and although you were expecting something like this to happen, you didn’t feel any less scared. You couldn’t help the tears streaming from your eyes.

A tall and buff man sat in front of you, he was dressed nice and all in black. He has a youthful face with piercings in his lips and tattoos all over his arms. Your heart squeeze inside of your chest, he was so handsome, why didn’t he just ask you out?

He took off the tape of your mouth, smiling prettily like a bunny.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Why did you kidnap me? Couldn’t you just ask me out like a normal person? Or fucking have this date in that restaurant instead of… here,” you said watching your surroundings with distress.

The sweet smile of the man fell at your words, his face hardened making you feel nervous.

And then, he slammed his hand on the table, making some things to fall to the ground, shattering. You startled scared, watching him with wide eyes.

“You will speak to me nicely! And you should be more grateful that I took you here instead of killing you!” he shouted with anger, and your eyes blurred with tears.

You nodded, too scared to speak.

His face softens immediately, and he stands to come closer to you, grabbing gently your chin to make you look up at him.

“I didn’t mean to yell at you sweetheart, but don’t make me angry again, okay?” he asked softly, but his eyes were hard with a warn written in them.

You nodded again, but he just sighed annoyed.

“Words, y/n.”

“Okay,” you whispered, and he smiled at you widely, stroking your cheek as a reward.

“That’s my good girl,” he said smirking, but he didn’t move from his place, instead he came closer to you, leaning his hands on each side of your chair, caging you between his arms. You looked up at him with fear, and he seemed to like it.

“And no, I didn’t kidnap you. You accepted this date, it’s consensual, and you know what is consensual too? You living with me very far away from here.” He said with mischievous and darkness in his eyes.

This time you cried with desperation.

“No that’s not true! I just accepted your date, not you kidnapping me!” you wailed, scared and angry, but he just looked at you with amusement and sadism.

“You should’ve know better before clicking that bottom.”

You laugh wetly with bitterness and no humor. The man was crazy and that didn’t even surprise you.

You were so fucked up.

Ko-fi

Taglist:

@demonshauntingthedoves @oddracha

[peachysunrize]

[TANGERINE DREAMS]

summary: being stood up on his wedding day, Aemond’s life takes a turn for the worse. Heartbroken and humiliated, he finds unexpected help in Helaena’s childhood friend, who helps him move back into his family mansion. Summer cocktail parties and a long stay at the Targaryen residency, Aemond might let the girl who’s always been in his life make a home in his heart.

Tangerines, in general, symbolize prosperity, good luck and happiness. So if these delicious fruits appear in your dreams - whole or in the form of juice - it is usually very positive. A dream with tangerines expresses the desire and the possibility of progress and prosperity

word count: 5.2k+

warnings: angst & fluff! English isn’t my first language<3

a/n: loviessssss welcome to the first chap of my summer romance! I hope you love this as much as I do when I’m writing it! Reblogs & comments are most appreciated🥹🍊 and very special thank you to @namelesslosers for betaing this for me<33🩷

Dividers by @/firefly-graphics

Taglist: please fill this form with your username to be added to the taglist!

Updates: every Saturday!

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Chapter 1: runaway bride

He shouldn’t be stressed, should he? 

Everything is in the right place; groomsmen are standing behind him while fixing each other’s coats and reassuring him, bridesmaids are in front of him as they talk and giggle, the guests are whispering and the priest is tapping his fingers on his watch.

Alys is a few minutes late, but it’s just a few minutes, there’s nothing to worry about. Aemond knows she must be even more stressed than he is. It’s their big day after all and naturally, the bride is the more anxious one. Surely that’s true, right? But why are his fingers fidgeting with the hem of his coat uncontrollably, why is rocking on the ball of his feet? He can’t be that nervous.

He looks around, finding his mum biting her nails. She searches around the room, looking for someone, anyone, to come and tell her about her bride-to-be’s whereabouts. His eye finds Helaena, watching as she caresses the flower petals before meeting his gaze, smiling broadly at him. He smiles back, but it doesn’t reach his eyes to convince her he’s doing alright. He is alright, just a tad bit too stressed for everyone’s liking, especially Helaena who can sense his nerves buzzing with excitement and fear. 

The church Alicent chose for his wedding has been used by Targaryens for years and passed on for generations. The walls covered in royalty tapestries of mythical Valyrian gods have seen many weddings and unions, and now, they will see his wedding.

He sighs, wanting to run his fingers through his hair but remembering his hair is in a low bun and his Mum would kill him if he ruined his perfectly done hair. He sighs again, looking up at the ceiling, his brow furrowing in worry.

What is taking her so long? She should have been here ten minutes ago.

Aemond turns around and looks at Daeron, their eyes meeting for a brief second before his younger brother nods and walks to the corner of the hall before slipping out the door without any hesitation. 

“Don’t worry, brother, she’ll come around,” Aegon says, his breath stinking with the three glasses of champagne he’s had from the bar in the garden attached to the church grounds, where they will host the party.

“This isn’t another simple date she can be late to. This is our wedding, Aegon!” He exhales shakily, his voice barely above whispering.

He knows he is right, even Aegon knows he is right, but there is little they both can do. They need to wait for her to show up eventually. She will, won’t she? Of course she will, it was Alys who was too eager to marry, start a family, and take a step towards their shared dreams. She reassured him of his hesitation, and he agreed to do this with a heart full of love.

“Sir,” the priest calls him, “I’m needed for another ceremony in about an hour and the ride there will take a long—“

“She will come,” Aemond’s response is more of a reassurance to him than the priest, “you must have seen this more than us, Sir, the bride always shows up.”

“Yes, yes, my apologies,” the man nods his head, going back to do whatever he was doing before. 

With every second that passes and Alys doesn’t show up he grows more restless, beads of sweat forming on his hairline. Aemond is a closed-up person, not really used to showing his feelings and emotions outwardly, but now, he is tapping his foot on the ground while his eye swipes at the guests, finding his half-sister’s family behind his Mum — he averts his eye quickly. The last thing he needs is to get furious over his sister’s goblins.

“What is taking her so long?” He hears someone say from the guests, even their stupid gossip is not enough to distract them from how late the bride is. He is growing desperate at this point, the muscles in his shin are growing tired with how fast he is tapping his foot on the floor, his fingers can no longer fidget with his coat instead his nails are digging into his sweaty palm.

Please, please, Alys, just open this door… He thinks to himself before spotting Daeron sneaking inside the hall with you on your toe. He watches as the two of you make your way toward Helaena, whispering something in her ear before she and Daeron leap out of the hall in a second, catching everyone’s attention.

The hall grows noisier, and the hushed whispers turn into loud accusations and questions; “Where is the bride?”

“I have always known she was problematic!” 

“Eight years older? How scandalous!”

“How did Viserys Targaryen let his son marry her?”

“I have heard she has quite the reputation with men, always after their money—“

Now his hands are shaking, he hides them by locking them behind his back before he looks in front of him, trying to mask out the noise. Aemond catches your eye, watching as you give him a reassuring smile before taking slow steps towards him.

“Hey you.”

“Hey…” he replies as best as he can without his voice breaking, “you look beautiful.”

“So do you, little nerd!” You reach to fix his bowtie, trying to calm him down a bit, “not so little though, right? You’re getting married before me!”

“Yeah, I’m younger and I beat you to it,” he chuckles a little, silently thanking you for keeping a leash on his nerves.

It’s always been like this since the two of you remember. Growing up close to the Targaryens as Helaena’s kindergarten friend until now, you have grown to know each of the siblings like the back of your hand, especially Aemond who was a constant presence in your games with Helaena since he could walk — sometimes it feels like you are his best friend and not Helaena’s with how attentive you are to him. As much as he wishes for that to be true, he knows the bond you share with his sister is something so precious and special that no one can break it.

“Just so you wait, Aemond, you won’t be invited to my wedding when the time comes!” You tease him, trying to lighten his mood, reaching to fix a few strands of hair that have fallen out of his bun.

“That’s not fair—“

Everyone falls silent when the door is pushed open, revealing a heaving Daeron and a very anxious Helaena. You both turn around to look at the siblings, meeting them halfway with Aegon following you closely. 

“We…” Helaena starts, but she can’t talk. Something bad must have happened for her to be so speechless.

“What?” You ask gently, resting your hand on her shoulders in hopes of trying to get her to talk.

“We found Alys,” Daeron looks at Aemond with an unreadable expression, “but she…”

“Spit it out for fuck sake!” Aegon whispers through gritted teeth, his hand shoved in his pockets as he waits for Daeron to finish his sentence.

“She doesn’t want to get married,” Helaena blurts out, swallowing the lump in her throat as she looks at Aemond with sad sympathetic eyes.

“Hel, this is insane. Did she say it herself—“ you say, frowning slightly.

“Criston is holding her back from running away. There’s a car parked outside, I think—“

Aemond can’t listen to these words anymore, so he pushes past his siblings and you, jogging out of the church towards the attached garden, finding Cole and Alys tangled in a messy fight as she tries to escape from his grasp.

“Alys!” He yells her name, making the couple freeze, but in a second, she knees Cole in his stomach and runs past him, her long white dress drags across the grass as she bolts out of the gates too fast for Aemond to be able to catch up, and once he does, he watches the car leave.

The noises around him vanish, and all he can hear is the thumping of his pulse in his ears, and the sharp breaths he takes. The world around him seems to disappear, and his good eye follows the path the car is taking, his fingers are tingling, his chest rising and falling rapidly while he tries to regain his grip on himself.

He sighs, finally his senses coming back as he looks around him, finding you, his Mum, and his siblings running towards him. Aemond doesn’t wish to talk to anyone, he wants to stay invisible, for the world to swallow him whole and keep him away from the humiliation that is about to be unleashed on him.

“Darling—“

“Aemond—“

The group reaches him, Alicent cups his face in her warm hands as she looks at him with tears stinging her eyes. Aemond can see how devastated she is about him, how she desperately wants to say something and ease his pain but the words are lost in the air when she opens her mouth to utter them.

He reaches and holds her wrists gently, pressing her palms against his cheeks as they silently communicate their emotions — no words need to be said, they understand, Alicent understands his pain, and he knows that she would take it away if she could.

“We should tell the guests,” Aemond says before letting go of his Mum’s hands, striding past his siblings and you towards the salon attached to the church, finding many of the guests already there — his half-sister and her kids with a few other relatives.

He knows they are waiting to hear more of this mess just to taunt him and make his day worse. Everyone knows they are looking for one mistake from him and his family to ruin their reputation, and now, with Aemond Targaryen’s runaway bride, they must be ecstatic.

“What happened, nephew? We thought we were invited for a traditional wedding, but all we see is a lonely groom—“

The glare Aemond gives his uncle and nephews is enough for them to shut up. He tries to put up a strong front, head held high and hands folded behind his back, but if you squint you can see how his resolve is crumbling with each second that he spends in their presence.

He decides not to give in to their silly games and walks towards the bar before he snatches the pack of cigarettes on the stool, leaving the room without saying a word. His mind is foggy as he tries to walk past everyone, he is handling many things at the same time but the bitter and heavy feeling in his chest crushes his strength to process it.

The sound of chatter and gossip fades away as he walks through the back garden of the church; a few little benches and a fountain in the corner hidden from the eyes of the guests with a wisteria tree.

This area could have made a romantic core memory for Aemond and Alys if only things had gone differently…

With a deep sigh, he sits on the ground, his back against the fountain as he fiddles with his bow tie, undoing the first few buttons of his shirt, his coat falling on the ground next to him. He opens the pack of cigarettes, pulling one out before he reaches in his pants for a lighter — something he is sure you’d scold him for as you always do, teasing him lightheartedly about his obsession with lighters.

When he inhales the smoke, his mind gets clearer, and he can think a little better, but he is not sure if he would really like to do so. His ex-fiancé left him just a few minutes ago, and his mind fills with dreadful thoughts.

Was it him?

Was he too young for her? Too immature?

Did she change her mind because she loved someone else?

Was he too strict and selfish?

Was it really him who brought this on himself? On his family?

He blows out the smoke, resting his elbow on his knee as he reaches to untie his bun, his hair falling freely around his shoulders while the droplets of water land on the soft silver strands from the fountain.

It is the beginning of the summer, the spring chill of the weather is replaced with an increasing heat, the birds chipper and he can see the peachy hue of sunset in the sky from between the leaves of the tree.

He feels numb, a dull ache in his chest blooming as the reality hits him. Aemond takes another drag of his cigarette, throwing his head back, and letting his hair fall inside the water fountain. He sniffs, closing his eye to keep his tears from flowing down, the storm of his thoughts wrecking his mind once again.

He loves her, she was his everything from the start — his first kiss, first girlfriend, first fight. Alys was his everything, and now, she is nothing but a memory, a memory he wishes to wipe away quickly. 

How can you claim to love someone and leave them without any remorse? 

There is guilt and sadness, but mostly it’s the doubt and self-hatred that makes him want to sob. Many questions are swirling in his head about how he is the reason she has left. Maybe she was right about leaving him, no one would like to be the wife of a man who deals with heavy pain daily.

He takes another drag, relishing in the feeling of the soft evening breeze that kisses his heated skin, cooling him down a little. The smell of smoke grounds him in this world, making him forget about the mess that is probably happening in the church. He is sure his siblings and Mum are trying their best to talk to Alys’ relatives and other guests, explaining the situation in a hurry.

“Your suite must have cost thousands,” you say casually, announcing your presence as you walk with your long dress in hand, careful with how uneasy your heels feel on the soft grass, making your way to where he is sitting.

“Nothing compared to the decorations she ordered,” he scoffs, putting out his cigarette on the edge of the stone of the fountain before he straightens his neck and looks at you.

“Yeah, I saw them,” you sigh, fisting your skirt before sitting next to him, shoulders touching subtly, “she has a very… interesting taste. Who’d thought a lawyer would be into witchcraft?”

“She likes things no one can understand,” he says, gazing up at the wisteria tree, “I also paid for the dress you are getting wet grass stains on—“

“That was irrelevant because Hel bought it for me! She knew how much of an ass you’d be about it,” you chuckle a little, watching as a ghost of a smile finds its way to his face before it falters and his eye drops to the grass, the smile no longer visible.

“Yeah, maybe that’s why Alys left,” he scoffs in disbelief again, shaking his head a little as he thinks of every bad trait he has, considering all of them could be the reason she decided she was better off without him.

“Her loss,” you say softly, “you are too funny, little nerd, even for someone who can be a stuck-up ass sometimes.”

“You are lucky my sister loved you enough to keep you around because I’d get rid of you the second I could,” he mumbles, huffing out a small laugh when you punch his biceps playfully.

“That’s not nice, Aemond!” You laugh together, rubbing the place where you hit him, “You love me too, that’s why you will never get tired of me,” saying this, you can see his shoulder tensing — love, what a weird word to use. 

Does he love you? Does he even love anyone?

Maybe he does, but it wasn’t enough to keep his fiance with him.

Maybe his love was too much for Alys to bear.

“How did you find me?” He asks, his voice hoarse and thick, “I was trying to be invisible.”

“Give me that—“ you grab the pack of cigarettes from him, pulling one out and waiting for Aemond to light it for you. You inhale a puff, handing it back to him before looking up at the sky, “do you remember when you’d steal my books and go into your old stables to read?”

“I do, no one could find me,” he takes a drag of the cigarette, blowing out the smoke before he talks, “but you did.”

“I believed you would do it because you wanted someone to look for you,” you look at him with soft eyes, “and I always did. Your siblings had no idea where you would go, but I knew you like the back of my hand. Or maybe I just wanted my book back!”

He matches your smile, but you can see the pain in his eye, this is not a time to beat around the bush. He wishes to let it out — whatever it is. Perhaps it’s anger, frustration, betrayal, maybe it’s his ultimate desire to vanish into thin air to save himself from the press and humiliation that he’ll be going through.

“What did I do wrong?” He asks, and you must be able to see the agony he is in, he is in grave distress, and the cloud of doubt is causing a tornado in his head that will kill the remaining of his confidence, “did I not give her enough love, show her how much I wanted her?”

“You gave her your heart, something you would never do for someone you didn’t like,” you reach and squeeze his shoulder, “you did your best, gave her your everything. We all saw how devoted you were, it is not your fault.”

“Then why? Why?!” He asks desperately, looking at you with his wide teary eye, the ocean blue orb staring into your soul with need, “I thought I was everything she wanted, she said it herself—“ he looks away before he can cry, throwing his head back to stop the tears from falling, putting the cigarette between his thin lips.

“You are more than enough, Aemond—“

“She wasn’t worth it, was she?” He cuts you off, “she took me for granted,” he sounds so little, so fragile, and he feels so.

“You loved her! I’m sure, Aemond, that your love for her was so beautiful and precious, it was Alys who couldn’t be better.”

“She was the one who wanted to get married as soon as possible…” he whispers, closing his eye as he talks with the cigarette between his lips, “even Aegon made fun of me for not saying no to her, he said I needed to grow up and not give in to her whims.”

“Aegon is a little shit, he can’t even keep one girl in a one-month relationship. He should be the last person on earth to get advice from,” You nudge his shoulder, grab the cigarette, and pull it away from his lips, “loving your partner is not a crime. So what? You liked spoiling her, did you not?”

“Yeah, I did…” he says, looking back down at his fingers rubbing over the fabric of his pants, “Alys used to tell me I was a kid too, that I needed to grow up or else I wouldn’t be a good husband.”

“Oh, Aemond…”

He averts his gaze towards you, tears brimming in his eye, “I did everything I could,” he is helpless, the gut-wrenching feeling is eating him alive.

“Don’t bottle it up, little nerd,” you reach and push a few strands of his hair behind his ear, “you can cry, I’m here.”

And he does; he rests his head on your shoulder and starts sobbing quietly, tears falling on his scarred cheek.

“I’m here,” you whisper, wrapping your arm around his shoulders, making him feel safe enough to pour his emotions out.

Aemond has been avoiding the situation as best as he can; ignoring his grandfather’s calls, not leaving the house for a few weeks, and trying to get a hold on his life again.

All his efforts are in vain.

He still lives in the same apartment in Rosby he and Alys bought a few months ago, their photos and pictures hanging on the walls, the bed they used to sleep on together, their bathroom, their kitchen — everything feels like an old movie reel, a twilight zone he doesn’t know if he likes to leave or embrace and drown in it.

Aemond has been keeping contact with his siblings throughout the past week, refusing their help to come and live with him for a while, saying he wanted some time alone to figure out what he wished to do from then on.

The media is filled with pictures of him standing outside the garden catching the car speeding away — how the paparazzi get there? No one knows but the fingers are pointed at his half-sister and uncle. The pictures are all over the news and the internet, mainly using his Targaryen name to drag him into the dirt.

He plops down on the couch, unlocking his phone only to be greeted with thousands of texts from his Mum and Daeron, begging him to come home and stay the summer with them in Targaryen residency. It’s not an idea he hasn’t entertained before, in fact, he would like to go back home and take some time off for himself. So he texts Alicent and tells her he’ll move in with them for a while until he is better and ready to come back to this forsaken apartment.

He starts packing a few hours later, dirty clothes thrown into the washing machine while he sits on the floor with a huge suitcase ready to be filled. Suddenly his phone starts ringing, startling him greatly. He reaches for the phone on the bed, looking at the screen to see who’s calling him. You. Your name lights up his phone, making him smile a little, thinking probably the word has spread like wildfire.

“Hey,”

“Hey yourself, little nerd!” You say enthusiastically, “heard you wanna move back into your Mum’s place.”

“Hmm, yeah,” he sighs, securing the phone between his ear and shoulder as he talks to you, “a change would be nice, especially for the summer.”

“Then you’re in luck!” You reply, “Hel asked me to come and spend the summer at the mansion too!” he chuckles when he hears you groaning over who knows what before continuing, “Anyway, I’ll come to your place whenever you want so I can help you pack whatever you’d like to take there and then drive to King’s Landing.”

“Sounds great, I really appreciate the offer,” he agrees, grabbing the phone as soon as the washing machine stops, “I’d like it if you could take some time and come here tomorrow?”

“Of course, just send me the location, alright? The sooner we pack, the sooner we can have some of Aegon’s magnificent cocktails!”

“Urgh, that loser will be home too?” He feigns a groan, breaking character when he hears your snort.

“Stop being mean to him, he makes the best Sex on the Beach!” You both chuckle, knowing you are right, Aegon does make the best cocktails known to humankind, “We’ll have fun there, and I’ve missed Vhagar so much!”

“I missed her too,” Aemond says fondly, “thank you again for helping me out, I wouldn’t have reached out if you didn’t call me.”

“Oh I know, that’s why I called. You can always count on me! Anyway, I’ll come tomorrow and help you pack.”

“Alright, thank you, I’ll text you the address,” Aemond says, grabbing the basket to empty the wet clothes from the washing machine.

“See you tomorrow, Little nerd!”

“You should have told me you have a Chevy Camaro, I doubt we can fit anything in this little car!” you hug and greet him when he opens the door, “I brought my things too if it’s okay with you.”

“Yeah, sure, the sooner we pack, the sooner we can leave!” He replies, grabbing your suitcase’s handle, and leading you inside his apartment, “Don’t worry, my car has carried much larger things. This is nothing.”

“Whatever you say! Now— woah, you are packed already?” You look around the room, a few boxes neatly put on top of each other and labeled, one backpack and another half-filled suitcase on the floor.

“I just need some help with my clothes and whether I should…” he points at the framed photos on the walls, photos of him and Alys, “throw them out or send them to her with her belongings.”

“Well, I think you should give it some time before you do something you might regret,” you squeeze his shoulder lightly, “it seems we can go tonight, right? You don’t have many things left to pack.”

“Yeah, just a few clothes! You can get the snack while I put them in the suitcase—“

“No, no, lemme fold your clothes! You should start putting the boxes away, I’ll get everything ready,” you pat him on the chest, walking towards his bedroom to fold his clothes for him.

He nods silently and thanks you before he grabs the boxes and leaves the apartment. You both work quickly, taking a break and having tea together, you ask about how he’s holding up, and he dismisses your questions as best as he can, not really wishing to entertain the thoughts that’ll disturb him.

“Aemond, do you want to bring your books too?” You ask him, groaning as you drop the heavy box on his bed, “because I doubt we’ll have enough space to take all of these with us to King’s Landing.”

“Just those that are already tucked away!” He yells from the kitchen, finishing cooking for you, “We’ll finish it after dinner, c’mon.”

“Okay,” you sigh tiredly, not really expecting the packing to drag on for so long. After all, he said he only needed a few clothes, not half of his wardrobe with his expensive watches and sunglasses.

“I think we have packed enough for at least ten spontaneous parties Aegon will be throwing this summer,” you mutter, sitting behind the island in the kitchen.

“I doubt he’d let an occasion like my birthday let go so easily now that I’m back home,” Aemond shrugs, handing you a plate, “he mostly ignores the occasion but I’m sure he and Mum will do something, and make a huge deal out of it. That’s why I need to be prepared.”

“Well, it’s the first birthday in a while that I’m attending too so it better be something good!” You tease him, thanking him for the delicious meal.

“It will be, or at least Mum’s plans will be great. She has Daeron as her non-assigned assistant now that I’m gone and they make quite the duo. They always host the best gatherings together.”

“Alicent is a perfectionist, of course, she’ll be the best person to throw a birthday party for you,” you agree with him, “but you can’t deny that Aegon’s parties are always better! He’s reckless, and the drinks are the best.”

“Only the best for the oldest Targaryen son, right?” He sighs again, looking down at his plate, “Sorry, it slipped my tongue, I shouldn’t have said it.”

“It’s okay,” you reach and rub his forearm, “you’re dealing with lots of things now, I understand, we all do.”

“I hope I don’t ruin your summer with us with my stupid sappy attitude,” Aemond jokes — or at least tries to.

“Sappy or not, you are my best friend’s brother, and I watched you grow up! There is nothing you can do to make my time with you miserable,” you smile at him softly, finishing your plate before you both stand up to get ready and leave, “I’ll take care of the dishes, you go close your suitcase and we take whatever’s left to your car.”

Time passes quickly and you find yourself getting inside Aemond’s car later than you expected. He makes sure everything is packed and safe both in the apartment and in the trunk before he gets inside the passenger seat — he can’t drive at night because of his eyesight so you’ll drive to King’s Landing. It’s not a long ride fortunately; four hours by car and you’ll be there in no time.

Aemond, despite trying to keep up with the conversation, falls asleep halfway through the road, and you let him take a nap before you arrive there and get bombarded by questions left and right.

When you pull in front of the entrance gates, Cole is already waiting for you, ready to take your bags out and park the car even though someone else could be doing it.

“Hi, Cole,” Aemond greets him with a thick voice, rubbing his sleepy eye before he gives Criston a halfway hug, patting his back.

You shut down the engine, get out of the car, and greet Cole after you hand him the remote, following Aemond in the path leading to the entrance door with a few boxes in hand as you help him take a few of his belongings inside the house.

Alicent is already waiting in front of the door anxiously, slowly rubbing her throat and neck as she waits for Aemond to reach her before she brings him in a tight embrace, not minding the sharp points of the boxes digging in her sides — just having her son with her is enough to remedy all of her pain.

“My darling,” she tears up a little, caressing his hair and kissing his cheek, “I’m so happy you decided to come home, I missed you so much.” “I missed you too, Mother,” he pulls back a little to put the boxes down and hug her completely, resting his head on top of hers as she wraps her arms around him.

Everyone is interrupted when a series of barks echo in the house, and in a second, a huge fluffy black Chow Chow jumps on Aemond, licking his face happily. Vhagar, oh, how he missed his old lady. He chuckles and scratches behind her ears, ignoring all the stares as he reunites with her.

“Babyyyyyyy!” Helaena squeals before she runs towards you to help you with Aemond’s things, kissing you and giving you a side hug, “Thank you for agreeing to come! I’m sure we’ll have lots of fun together.”

“Thank you for having me, lovey!”

“I’m so thankful you helped him, darling,” Alicent pulls away from the pair nearly lying on the floor while one of them is having his face licked, her hand caressing your back as she draws you in her arms as well, “Thank you for bringing home, I’m in debt to you—”

“Oh, no, it was nothing!” You look at her before giving Aemond and Vhagar a cheeky smile, “It was the least I could do, I’m glad I could help.”

“Come, come! You must be tired, your rooms are ready. Cole will take your bags,” she says, leading the way with Aemond who has his free arm wrapped around Daeron, and Vhagar jumps next to his feet while you and Helaena follow them.

“Aegon is asleep, you know him, he has big plans for this summer, especially now that Aemond can use some distraction,” she bumps her shoulder to yours, “meaning we’ll have the time of our lives!”

“Yeah,” you smile at her before looking ahead of you, catching Aemond turning around to give you a quick smile, “What a summer it’ll be.”

[checosbluespring]

secrets we keep (pt2) → mv1

max verstappen x perez!fem reader

genre: teammates sister, pregnancy

cw: 18+ MDNI, smut, oral (female receiving), p in v, slight possessiveness, dirty talk, pregnancy, childbirth (brief), slight angst?, pls let me know if i am forgetting anything

word count: 6.4k

song: coraźon sin cara-prince royce

sidenote: omg!! finally after 2 monthes i am finally done with part 2 of secrets we keep. this is the last part of the series but if you guys want i could do an epilogue, let me know what yall think. also thank you so so so much for all the positive feedback on this story, you are all amazing. please send in requests and i will do them to the best of my ability! also like true me fastion this is not beta read. hope you all enjoy <3

you can read part one here

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It's been three months since you first found out about the baby. You haven't told anyone. Trying your best to hide your newly growing bump. Even though you were scared, you knew you wanted to keep the baby. Even if you had to pack up and leave everything behind, this baby was yours and you were going to be their mom. 

It wasn't hard keeping this a secret from your brother, he was halfway across the world but your mom and dad on the other hand were difficult. As time went on you felt as if you couldn't keep it a secret from anyone. You felt alone, you had to go to all your doctors appointments by yourself and it was scary. 

You wanted to showcase your pregnancy, wanted a baby shower, to wear long flowy dresses that pronounced your bump. You wanted to start decorating a nursery for the baby. You couldn't do that alone, you needed to tell someone. You needed to tell your mom. But that meant telling them that you would be a single parent. Not that there's anything wrong with that but you know that's not what your family envisioned for you. You couldn't keep doing this alone though. You are about to find out the sex of the baby and you want your whole family to be there.

Making your way to your parents house, you see your brother's car in the driveway. You don't panic right away because you assume it's carola bringing the kids over to visit. When you walked in you shouted “mamá estoy en casa” mom I'm home. You miss living with them but you visit almost every other day, so really it's like you never left. 

Walking through the house you hear no-one, but as you make your way through the kitchen to the back patio you see your brother. “Ay dios mio” oh my god, you scream and practically run into Sergio’s arms. 

“Hola hermanita” hi baby sister, he says while hugging you back. You blame it on the pregnancy hormones but you start crying. “Hey, qué pasa?” What's wrong? He asked in a worried tone. You don’t know what overcame you but you felt the sudden urge to tell them. 

“¿Puedes sentarte con mamá y papá?” Can you sit with mom and dad? It’s just the four of you at the house. The sooner you get this done, the sooner you can start living life. Your mom and dad look worried, you don’t want to scare them so you just blurt it out.

“Mamá, papá, sergio, estoy embarazada” mom, dad, sergio, I’m pregnant. Nothing would prepare you for the looks on their face. Your mom and dads jaw on the floor, your brother's jaw clenched.

“Hablas en serio” are you serious, your dad spoke up. All you can do is nod. “Who’s the dad? How did this happen” your mom said in English. You knew she was shocked because she hardly ever used English when it was just the 4 of you. It’s not like you weren’t expecting them to ask who the father was. But you hadn’t quite thought of who you were going to tell them. Because there is no way you are going to tell them about Max, they would kill you. Sergio would look at you differently. 

“I-i-i, I can’t tell you who it is because he doesn’t matter, he doesn’t want to be a father right now and I won’t put him in the position to do so. I want this baby because I know I have you guys to help support and love me. This baby is going to be so loved, it doesn’t need a dad because they are going to have sergio and dad being a great role models for them. Mom, I need your love and guidance right now more than anything in the world. I am still your daughter, I want you to love this baby no matter what, no matter who their dad is, or how they were conceived” you said while big tears rolled down your face. 

Segio was the first to move and give you a hug, whispering “I always got you”. He leans back and places a hand on your stomach, “seré un tío” I am going to be an uncle. 

You nod and smile. Your mom and dad look perplexed but they make their way to you and both give you a kiss on the cheek and a hug. “No puedo esperar para conocerte bebé''  I can’t wait to meet you baby,  your mom said while holding your stomach. You know it’s going to take some time for your dad to come around to the idea but he’s supportive and that’s all that matters. 

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Over the next couple of weeks you finally start getting stuff ready for the baby. Buying stuff for the nursery and clothes for yourself. Right after your brother found out about the pregnancy he took you to the store and had you pick out a crib you liked. You were forever grateful to have him. 

It’s Friday morning and you are patiently waiting for your mom and carola to pick you up for your ultrasound appointment, where you would be finding out if you are having a boy or girl. You are beyond excited. You don’t care what you have, as long as the baby is healthy and happy. 

Getting up to put your shoes on, you hear your phone ring, assuming it’s your mom and sister in law telling you that they are ready for you to come out. You look at your phone and see it’s a text from a random number. Something in the universe is telling you not to open it, but you do. 

Hey y/n. It’s max. I just wanted to text you and see how you are. I know it’s been a couple of months since we last talked, but I feel like you are avoiding me. I take part of the blame too. I should have reached out but I was expecting to see you in Miami but you weren’t there. Is it because of me? I promise I’ll leave you alone if it is. I just want to make sure you are okay. I hope to see you at the Mexico GP in the next few months. Please text me if you ever need anything. I’m here for you. 

You don’t realize the way your eyes are stinging with tears until after you are done reading the text. A pang of guilt and sadness washes over you. You want to be so mad at max for texting you, but you know he has no idea, and he’s just trying to be nice. Your heart physically hurts, it’s like your baby knows it’s missing a piece of something. You remind yourself though that you are strong, so is this baby, and max is just getting started with his career. He does not need you or a baby weighing him down. 

Jolting you out of your thoughts, you hear the car horn signaling you to walk out the door. You can’t dwell on max, he’s a distant memory. All you should be focusing on is this baby. No matter how bad it hurts not having the father of your child around. 

Once at the doctors office, you are laying down with your belly exposed and cold gel covering every inch. “Do you want to know the sex of the baby?” You nod eagerly and hold your moms hand. 

“Ooo they are hiding from me, come on baby let’s see what you are” finally finding a good position, the doctor takes a few pictures and says “congratulations mama, it looks like you are having a girl”. You look over to see your mom crying and Carola recording everything. “I’m having a baby girl” you kept repeating to yourself. You have never felt more happy. 

When you are home alone, you start to think of the life you and your daughter will have. How you are going to homeschool her, and travel everywhere together. But your mind drifts to what could have been if max was involved. You had no doubt that max would be the best dad. He would be devoted and loving. A good father. He would take your daughter all over, putting her in karting right away but ultimately letting her choose her own path. Stop y/n, you tell yourself, those are dreams that won’t be coming true but you and your family will provide the best life for your baby girl. 

All you can do is be thankful and happy, you want to embrace pregnancy in the next 5 months. You ultimately decide it’s best not to text max back, not to add fuel to the fire. You hope as time goes on you are able to accept the fact that max won’t be a part of this journey. 

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Months have passed, leaving you in your third trimester with little under eight weeks until you meet your precious baby. Pregnancy has been tough but also so rewarding, you can finally feel her little kicks, especially when you are watching your brother race on tv, subconsciously you wonder if she gets so excited because she sees her dad but then you tell yourself to stop being so delusional and she doesn't even know who her father is.

The Mexico GP is today and you have already told your entire family you aren't going. It would be too risky for the baby, but in reality it's too risky for max to see you. There was no more hiding your pregnancy. No matter how big the shirt or hoodie is, you can still see your bump. It’s better you stay home and just wait for everyone to come back. 

Kicking your feet up, you turn on the tv and watch the start of the race. You see the crowds filled with your brother's face, and his number along with max’s. Sergio had a great start, pushing to the front of the grid, having him leading the race. Max followed closely behind him. 

The race after the start was uneventful. Your brother won and you were extremely sad you didn't get to be there to congratulate him in person. Max was second and then Oscar, it was a good podium in your eyes. 

You patiently wait for your entire family to come home including your brother. You knew that would be hours though, so you decided to take a nap on the couch. That nap ended up being a five hour nap and when you opened your eyes you saw it was dark out. Something woke you up though and it was the sound of the front door of your parents house unlocking. Sitting up you get ready to jump into your brother's arms to congratulate him. One by one your family walks in, mom, dad, carola, the kids, sergio, and then max. 

You feel your heart drop to your stomach, you have to think quickly. He may find out you are pregnant but your family doesn't need to know that. Walking confidently over to your brother you pull him into a hug and say “felicidades hermano estoy muy feliz por ti” congrats brother I am so happy for you. You have yet to acknowledge that max is even standing in your familys living room with his mouth agape. Sergio hugs you back and says a quiet thank you. 

“¿Por qué está Max en la casa?” Why is max at the house? You say to your brother hoping max did not catch any of that. But your brother had a different idea. 

“Max wanted to come see the house and the city so we offered to let him stay the night and we can take him sightseeing tomorrow!” 

You nod your head and walk over to him, extending your hand out for him to shake. “Welcome max, and congrats on the podium” you say. There was no way he didn't see your stomach. You were wearing a tiny tank top that you practically spilled out of. You know he's not going to say anything to you in front of your family. So maybe if you went to your room and ignored him this whole thing would blow over. 

You should know better than that though. Because your family loved to bring up the fact that you are pregnant. You couldn't blame them, they had no idea that the father of the baby was 2 feet away from them.

Your mom was the first to speak up. “How is the baby Amor, did you get to rest or did she keep you up”. Well now he knows it's a girl. A part of you wanted to go cry in a corner but another part wanted to dote on your daughter no matter what. “No she has been really content today, during the race when she saw you sergio she got so happy, she was moving all over the place”.

A big smile formed on your brother's face, “that's my niece, she couldn't wait to see her uncle win”. You take a sneakily look over to max and he looks confused, hurt, and tired. You can't deal with this, you have to excuse yourself. You are going to tell them you have to go back to your house, even though you have been spending the last week sleeping over at your parents. 

“Guys I think I am going to drive back to my apartment, that way max can sleep in my room” you say hoping you came off as convincing 

“Nonsense, I can sleep on the couch” max is quick to reply.

Your dad is next to reply “you can't leave in the middle of the night, you are 8 months pregnant, you can't be alone”.

You don't have the energy to fight them so you bid them a goodnight and head to your room, hoping you don't get a visitor late in the night. Oh how could you be so wrong. 

Tossing and turning in your bed you can't fall asleep, maybe it was the nap, maybe it was because your baby's father was 10 feet away from you. You don't know if it's the hormones but you want him, it's like a primal urge. Like you have been separated for so long and he just suddenly came back and he looked good. His hair is long, a tiny bit of stubble growing on his cheeks. 

You have to sleep but you can't. You look at your phone and it's 3 in the morning, max has to be asleep right, it was an exhausting race. He wouldn't wake up right? If you go out to make yourself some tea. 

You hate yourself for it but part of your subconscious wants him to ask, but you know deep down that would be the worst possible idea. Throwing your feet off the bed you stand up unsteadily and start to slowly walk out of your room. Max looks like he’s asleep as you pass the couch. Once in the kitchen you turn on the small light next to the oven and start to make yourself some tea. 

Once done with putting everything away you turn around to grab your drink but see a sleepy looking max walk over to you. You don't mean to sound hostile but you do when you say “why are you up”. This was the man you loved, the father of your baby, but you were angry, at yourself or at him, you didn't know. 

“I could ask you the same question” he responded. “I couldn't sleep, so I needed to get myself some tea, goodnight max”. You begin to walk away and as you walk past him he grabs your arm and says “wait, we need to talk”. Shit you've been caught, you think to yourself.

“About what?” Maybe if you play dumb he will also and ignore everything. 

“You know about what y/n, don't play dumb, it's not a good look on you” max says with a snarl and strong grip on your forearm. The authoritativeness of his voice and demeanor sends chills down your spine. 

“Okay, but not here” you whisper. Grabbing his hand you wander outside to the patio where no one can hear you from inside the house. You sit down and let max talk. 

“So. You're pregnant?” 

“Yes” is all you can say

“Your dad said you're eight months pregnant, so either you were pregnant when we slept together, or that baby is mine. Which is it y/n?” 

“I - I, it's none of your business max, this baby and I were fine before this and we will be fine long after you leave” you stutter out.

“So she is mine, god damnit y/n, why didn't you tell me? I've lost 8 months of your pregnancy. Were you ever going to tell me?” 

Guilt is eating away at you and you feel tears burning your eyes.

“I didn't think you would want anything to do with the baby max, you and I live completely different lives. You are you max, having a baby is a big responsibility. Do you know how hard it is for carola? She has four babies. She has to take them on planes all over the world so they can see their dad. How could I raise a baby with you, when we hardly know each other? When you don't even want to be with me? Tell me max, how would that work?”

“That's not your decision to decide on your own. How could you hide this from me? I could have been there for you, I could have been the one taking you to doctors appointments. Who knows?”

“Who knows what?”

“Who knows I’m the dad?”

“No one, I told them it doesn’t matter who the father is”

“I can’t believe you y/n, now everyone is going to think I’m some deadbeat dad who doesn’t want to be a part of their baby’s life. Well to hell with that, no more secrets. I am going to raise this baby and we are going to do it together” he said.

All you can do is nod your head and whisper out an “okay max, no more secrets”

“And who said I didn’t want to be with you?” 

This catches your attention, because you hoped he would have ignored you when you said that. But of course he didn’t, max is the most observant person you've ever met.

“Max you have no idea how long I’ve been in love with you. Long before you and segio even became teammates, I yearned for you. But I refuse to trap you into staying with me just because I am having your baby”

“Again y/n that’s not your decision to make, do you think I would have slept with you if I didn’t have feelings for you. What kind of guy do you think I am? Y/n I don’t know where we stand on us being together but we are both the parents and I know we care for eachother. I will move to Mexico if I have to, but you are not going to keep this baby out of my life”

“I understand max, but what are we going to do when the press find out? Do you really want your daughter under that scrutiny? How are we going to tell our families? I’m sure my brother and your father are gonna be really fond of the idea of us having a baby together”

“Y/n you are not listening to me, none of that matters, who cares what anyone says. If your brother decides to punch me so be it, but that’s not going to stop me from being a loving and present dad, I’m not going to be like my father”

Something snaps inside of you, a need to reassure him and be close to him. You stand up and grab both his hands.

“Of course you aren’t going to be like your father, you are an amazing person, I didn’t keep this pregnancy a secret because I thought you would be a bad dad, I did it because I was scared of everything else. You don’t know how much I wished you were at the doctors appointments with me holding my hand. Going shopping to buy clothes and bottles. Some nights I would cry myself to sleep knowing our daughter would grow up not having you in her life. Taking her karting, protecting her, chasing her around that paddock. So don't ever think I hid her from you because I thought you were going to be a bad dad. It was me who was scared of how everyone would react and what they would say when they found out their precious max verstappen would have a child out of wedlock”. 

Max pulls you into a hug, and for once in these past 7 months of pregnancy you felt like you could finally breathe.

“I’m going to protect you guys no matter what” he muttered into your hair.

The baby was excited, maybe because she knew her dad was finally with us. She was kicking up a storm. 

“Max feel, she’s so happy you are here” you say as you grab his hand and place it on your tummy. 

“She’s strong, maybe she will want to play football one day” he says with a smile. 

“Let’s go to bed, we can talk more tomorrow” grabbing his hand you lead him to your bedroom.

Laying down on your side, max lays behind you and places a hand over your stomach. You sleep the best you have in a very long time. 

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Telling your family that max was the father of your baby went as well as you would think. No glasses were broken, no bleeding, there were some strong words shared but honestly you expected that. 

As max was taking a shower, you sat in the living room waiting for everyone to come out to leave. Your brother plops down next to you and says “you know you could have told me”

“I couldn’t sergio, I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me”

“Y/n you are my sister, you always come first before my career, I could never be disappointed in you. Grossed out a little? Yeah. But never disappointed.”

You find yourself laughing and laying your head on his shoulder. You don’t know how you got so lucky to have a family so supportive. 

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ✦

Being with max is like a breath of fresh air. You didn’t know how bad you actually needed him, and now that you actually have him, you aren’t sure you can let go.

He jumped into his role of father to be fast and efficiently, much like he does with everything else. Before he left back to Monaco, he asked if he could go to a doctor's appointment with you and of course you said yes. You did make him wear a mask and hoodie to help disguise him. 

Your doctor was surprised to see you come with a man, as you thought she probably assumed you were doing this alone. 

“Who is this?” She asks with a smile and extends her hand out for max to shake.

Just as you were about to say a friend. He beats you to the punchline. 

“Hello, I am the father of the baby, sorry it’s taken so long for us to meet, my work schedule keeps me busy” You smiled and grabbed his hand. 

The rest of the appointment was smooth, the exciting part was the ultrasound. Max was by your head, watching tentatively at the screen.

“Baby girl looks good, has a fast little heart beat, height and weight are all in range, let’s take a listen to her” the doctor says as she allows us to hear the echoes of the baby’s heartbeat. This wasn’t new to you, but you never got over the fact that you were growing another life in you. You look over and see max in absolute awe. If you look close enough you actually think you see a tear in his eye. He grips your hand tight and says “her heart beat is so fast and strong, oh my god I can’t believe we are actually seeing her, doctor can I please have an ultrasound picture”. You are shocked he asked her for one, but for some reason his asking really reassured you that he was in this for the long haul, even if you guys weren’t a couple. 

The appointment wraps up with the doctor giving us a couple ultrasound pictures and instructions to not travel, as you might actually deliver within the next couple of weeks if not sooner. 

As you are driving home with max you ask what he thought. “Y/n that was amazing, I can’t believe we are having a little girl. She’s so big and strong already, do you have any names you think? I know we have a lot of stuff to discuss but after seeing her, everything seems like it’s going to work out. I will do whatever I have to, to keep you and her safe”.

You feel the words get stuck in your throat, all you can do is nod and say “it’s going to be the greatest experience you and I have ever accomplished. As for names, I have a couple in mind but I want your input. I have always really liked the name Alejandra or Catalina. but I want her to have a part of your culture in her name as well”. You look over to him to see a satisfied smile resting upon his face. 

“I think those are great names, she will have a part of me in her last name, so whatever first name you want, I am happy to go along with it”. 

Life feels really good right now. The sun is shining, and even though you and max are not together in the way you want, you will both work together to provide your daughter a happy life.

Max takes you back to your place. As you both walk in, you wash your hands and proceed to plop down on the couch, not bothering to take off your shoes. Max notices and kneels in front of you to unlace your laces, slowly taking them off. You don’t know if it’s the hormones but the tiniest of touch was leaving you with butterflies in your stomach. 

“Thank you max” you muttered. 

“What kind of partner would I be if I wasn’t able to do this for you” your heart skips a beat when he says the word partner. 

Once finished he stands to look down at you. “You know y/n, pregnancy suits you. You look so pretty with our baby growing in you”. You can’t help but blush at the compliment. Starting to feel a heat overtake your body. You wanted him, but you couldn’t let him know that.

It’s like he could read your mind though. “Do you know I think about our night together often, every time before bed I touch myself thinking about your body and how it felt. Ever since being in Mexico, everytime I shower I get myself off thinking of you. Seeing you so domestic, barefooted, pregnant, not a care in the world, It makes me feral for you. I crave you y/n, do you feel the same?”

If it was easy for you to get up from the couch you would have pounced on him in a second. But instead he understands and grabs both of your arms, hoisting you up so you are standing in front of him. “Max, do you know how difficult it has been for me to not kiss you, grab you, love you this past week, I want you so bad, I want to be yours forever and always”

That's all max needs to hear before he grabs your face leading you into a kiss. It's a little awkward because of your big belly but you guys make it work. You can't stop kissing him. Things get heated very fast, teeth clashing, lips being bitten, hair being pulled. Max leads you to your bedroom where he takes off his shirt then yours. You hadn't worn a bra that day so he immediately went to grab your tits, worshiping them.

“God, your tits are amazing, they are so massive, presented to me, ready for me to take and devour”

You moan in response when you look down to see max leaving feather-like kisses around your nipples. When he hears your moan he pops one of your nipples into his mouth and begins to suck. While it all felt so good, you wanted him in you and he could tell you were growing impatient.

Popping off, he leads you to the bed and makes you sit. Your face now level with his crotch. You take this opportunity to start to unbuckle his belt and shimmy his pants and underwear off. Just as you are about to take him into your mouth, he stops you. 

“Not today darling, today is about you, and I want to taste you, I've been dreaming about it for months”

He lays you back gently, pulling off your pants and underwear you feel the slightest insecure at being so exposed. In response you try and close your legs but he doesn't let that stop him. He separates them open with his hands, kneeling in front of you. 

“Don't hide from me baby, let me make you feel good” max says as he looks up at you for confirmation.

You nod, and prop yourself up on your elbows so you can see what he's doing. Quite honestly you can't really see him because your belly is in the way but you do make eye contact with him as he makes his way down. 

He licks a fat stripe right on your heat, it sends shocks of pleasure coursing through you. Max proceeds to kiss along the sides of your thighs, teasing you.

“Max, babe, please” you beg out.

“Is my girl needy for me? You're mine right? No one else, just mine. Say it y/n, tell me you are mine” 

He has barely touched you and you already feel so fucked out. You manage to get the words out though “yes max I'm yours, only yours, I only have ever wanted you”. That seems to satisfy him because his mouth is on your clit in seconds. Taking his time between licking and sucking the bundle of nerves. It felt euphoric, max didn't get a chance to go down on you the first time you guys had sex, but now that you've got a taste of what his mouth could do, you don't know how you could ever let it go. 

Sucking hard on your clit, he takes the opportunity to stick his middle finger in you. Slowly working you open, not that you need it, you are dripping in arousal. Your moans are filling up the room, max adds a second finger in you, curling up, creating something you have never felt before. The way his fingers moved inside of you, the way his mouth devoured you. It felt so good, you felt bad because you were pulling his hair, practically moving his face. 

“Fuck, max your mouth feels so good”.

Max takes his mouth off of you and says “you taste so good y/n, I could eat you out for hours on end” 

You never pegged max to be a man practically starved for pussy but here you are, and you are grateful that he is. You needed him in you though. 

“Amor (love), please come fuck me, I need it so bad” 

“How can I say no to my pretty girl, lay on your side” 

You shimmy yourself up the bed, laying on your side. Max makes his way beside you, laying down. You take the opportunity to turn your head back and look at him. You see him slowly pumping his cock, about to slide it in you he asks, “Shit, do you want me to wear a condom”

Quite literally you couldn’t want anything less. “No no no, please I want to feel you fill me up. I want to be dripping with your cum” 

“Fuck you drive me crazy y/n, you have such a dirty mouth on you.”

You reach back and grab his hip, helping him line himself up with your entrance. He trusts into you in one swift motion, the burn is just like you remember. The stretch is unlike anything you’ve ever felt. Max takes his hand and reaches over to interlock his fingers with yours. No words have been exchanged but you have never felt closer to him than in this moment. 

You can’t reach back to kiss him, but he does leave a trail of wet, sloppy, kisses down your neck. You can already tell you aren’t going to last much longer, you have had so much bottled up, you needed a release. Max can tell by the way you are clenching down on him. 

“Are you close? Play with your pretty clit for me, I’m right there with you”

You nod vigorously, taking your hand and rubbing between your legs. The next thing you know you feel your climax reach an all time high, and you are cumming all over his cock. You let out the biggest moan and feel your legs shaking. You can feel yourself throbbing, basically begging Max to cum inside you. He grabs your hip hard, you look down and see his knuckles are white, he slams into not once, not twice, but three times and suddenly you feel a warm liquid filling you up. Max groans, placing his face in your neck. 

You guys lie there in a comfortable silence, just enjoying the closeness and comfort, because tomorrow he will be leaving back home and you don’t know how you are going to handle it.

Max slowly slides out of you and you feel his seed leaking out of you down your thighs. He kisses your cheek and mutters something about cleaning you up. He comes back in with a wipe and spreads your legs to clean you up. This feels extremely intimate but you allow yourself to be comfortable with it because you deserve to be taken care of. 

After everything is sorted, you are both laying down and it’s you who speaks first. “Max, what does this mean”

He takes a deep breath before speaking. “I was mad at you for not telling me, I needed time to process everything, which is why I told you I needed time, but don't ever for a second doubt I didn't want you or the baby. I'm in it for the long run y/n. I’ll follow you both anywhere.”

“I’m sorry max, I can't imagine a life where you and I aren't together” 

“You shouldn't be due until the end of the season, so right after the last race i'll pack a couple of bags and stay down here. I was thinking we would spend the first 6 months in Mexico and the next 6 in Monaco. I'll keep paying the house so we can go whenever. When racing starts back up we will figure it out then but im looking forward to having a couple of months with you guys disturbance free”

Your heart warms at the idea of him finding compromises for the both of you. And he was right, we would figure the logistics out as time went on, all that mattered was that you both were on the same page. 

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　 ✦

Max and Sergio finished the season off strong, and max stayed true to his word. Right after the last race he was on the first plane out to Mexico to join you for the birth. 

Quite honestly he came in just enough time because not even two days after his arrival, your water broke. 

“Do we have everything packed in the car max” you ask while pacing around the room.

“Yes sweetheart, let's get going” 

As you expected max was completely calm and collected, acting as a support system. When the doctor came in and told you, we were ready to push, you got scared and max could sense that. He grabbed your hand and whispered “hey look at me. everything is going to be okay, do you think I would ever let anything happen to you guys? you are so strong and I can’t wait to see our beautiful daughter”

His words of encouragement helped you during the delivery process and before you knew it, your baby girl’s cry’s entered the room. 

“Dad, do you want to cut the umbilical cord?” the doctor asked. The sheer look of awe was all over max’s face. You watch as he gently cuts the cord and makes his way back to you. After she is cleaned up they plop her down on your chest and you just take her in. She is the perfect mix of both of you, she has max’s pretty turquoise eyes and your dark hair. 

You look up at max and see that he has tears in his eyes. 

“She’s so beautiful, she’s perfect y/n and she’s all ours”

You nod because you are at a loss for words at how special this moment is.To think what this would look like right now if you never told him. Looking at both max and the baby, you begin to wonder how lucky you got. This baby started as a secret but ended up being the best thing that could happen to either of you. And you can’t wait to see the life that you and max build together. 

♡♡♡♡

[ivyluvsyouu]

I saw your series of genshin characters if their s/o dies and I wanted to request it with Kaveh Tighnari Furina Lyney and whoever else you wanna add?

𝑶𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟑

𝑻𝒘: 𝑩𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒅, 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒔: 𝑲𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒉, 𝑻𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒊, 𝑭𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒂, 𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒆𝒚, 𝑨𝒓𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒐,𝑵𝒆𝒖𝒗𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆

𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟏 (𝑪𝒚𝒏𝒐, 𝑨𝒍𝒃𝒆𝒅𝒐, 𝑿𝒊𝒂𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑲𝒂𝒛𝒖𝒉𝒂)

𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟐 (𝑫𝒊𝒍𝒖𝒄, 𝑲𝒂𝒆𝒚𝒂 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰𝒕𝒕𝒐)

𝑲𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒉

You had left for a commission a day ago. You weren't supposed to be gone long, maybe a few hours at most which is why when Kaveh woke up the morning after you left and you weren't in bed with him, he was extremely worried. He asked everyone he saw that day if they had seen you, and he even went out to where your commission was supposed to be to look for you but nothing. Not a single trace of you was left there, By the end of the day he was worried sick, and he was going around asking for the second time if they had seen you.

He had gotten Cyno to go out in the desert and look for you and he found you dead near the sight of where your commission had been. When Kaveh found this out he was in a state of shock. You? dead? his s/o? his strong s/o? there was no way, he wouldn't believe it. He refused to believe it. For a few months after your death Kaveh was just in complete denial and everyone was worried about him. Even his roommate Al-Haitham had tried talking to him about what had happened to you but every time he did Kaveh would just shake his head and deny it. "No, Y/n's not dead..." he would say, even if deep down he knew he was just saying this because he couldn't admit it. He knew you were gone, and he knew that denying it wasn't helping.

About a year after your death is when he started to come to terms with it. And it was the hardest thing he had ever done; He barely left the house and when he did, he didn't talk to anyone. He took about a year just keeping to himself and trying to cope and after that year he slowly started to become himself again. But even after that it always seemed like a piece of him was missing.

𝑻𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒊

You had always been extremely sickly. It was something you had delt with since you were young and when you met Tighnari and ended up starting a relationship with him he wanted you to live a good healthy life. He would always try to make new medicines for you, but nothing seemed to work. Tighnari knew deep down that your sickness would be the thing to kill you, but he would've never admitted it.

One morning Tighnari woke up to the sound of you coughing and it was clear that you were having a hard time breathing. He immediately got to work trying to find something to give you to help but nothing worked. Tighnari desperately tried to save you but in the end, it was futile you ended up dying that afternoon. Tighnari was with you in your last moments. "Please hold on Y/n.." He begged as he held your hand tightly. As you took your final breaths Tighnari just broke down into tears.

Collei heard him crying in the room over and came into the room and she gasped when she saw the sight before her. Collei did her best to comfort Tighnari, but nothing could help right now. "I appreciate you trying to make me feel better, but I need some time alone right now" He choked out. He spent the next few days locked up in his office just mourning. After about four days he knew that he had to return to work even if it was hard. When he returned to his duties, he pushed down all of his emotions and he just kept everything hidden from everyone. Whenever someone would ask him how he was doing and how he was coping he would just respond with. "I'm fine."

𝑭𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒂

(𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒓𝒔!! 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒏 𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕!)

You were killed by a member of the fatui. You were out late one night, and you had run into the fatui on accident, and it didn't end well for you. The beloved s/o of the God of justice Furina, the people of Fontaine loved you just as much as they loved her and the whole nation of Fontaine was in mourning.

But it was nothing compared to Furina's mourning. You were the only one Furina trusted with her secret. The only one she confided in. You were everything to her and you were just gone? She was absolutely devasted and for months after your death she locked herself in her room. Refusing to come out and leaving all of the work to Neuvilette.

And she had no intention of leaving any time soon. She couldn't face her people like this. She couldn't put the act on right now she just couldn't. One morning she was looking out the window of her room and it was raining, and she had noticed that the water levels had indeed risen. She sighed and she knew she needed to return to her work. She did what she does best, and she forced herself to put on the act that she was okay and that she was coping well with your death. She forced herself to be strong and once again she forced herself to be a god.

𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒆𝒚

Lyney being involved with the fatui meant he was involved with some pretty dangerous people. However, he never thought that those people would end his beloved s/o's life. Lyney had some problems with a few of the people in the fatui and one of those people took it out on his s/o and one day when you were on a commission one of those people killed you. Lynette was actually the one that got the word that you had gotten killed, Lyney was away from Fontaine and when he got back, he expected to be greeted by his beloved s/o but he wasn't.

Instead, he was greeted by his sister Lynette who looked extremely worried. "What's wrong sister? Where's y/n?" He asked. Lynette frowned and looked at her brother. She told him that you had been killed and as soon as the words left her mouth Lyney gasped and covered his mouth. He couldn't believe what he was hearing, He wasn't even gone from Fontaine for long and you were fine before he left. You kissed him goodbye and told him that you'd see him when he gets home. You were alive a few days ago and now you were just gone? it was so much to process. He sat down and he stayed silent for a few moments with hundreds of thoughts running through his mind.

After a while he still realized Lynette was there waiting for him to say something. He nodded and spoke softly "Thank you for telling me..." He said getting up and walking to his room. He cried himself to sleep that night, the bed felt so empty without you next to him and he didn't get much sleep at all that night. Lyney tries to push forward and move on like normal since he knows he has a job to do, and he has to take care of his siblings. And while the people around him might think he's doing better he never fully gets over you.

𝑨𝒓𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒐

Whenever you had commissions, she would always accompany you and today was supposed to be no different but as you two were about to set out Arlecchino got word that there was a situation she needed to tend to. You assured her that you'd be fine and Arlecchino nodded. She believed you would be fine, and she kissed you bye and she told you she'd meet up with you later. But when she met up with you later what she saw shocked her. She found you lying in a pool of your own blood. You had gotten hit pretty bad in the stomach. She ran over to you, and she scooped you up in her arms. "Dear? Dear what happened!" She said trying to shake you awake.

But she was too late, you were dead. She brought you back the House of the Hearth and there was a funeral held for you. She knew mourning was for the weak, but she couldn't help but give herself a few days. She gave herself a few days to mourn and a few days only. When the few days were up, she returned to her work even if it hurt and it was hard. She became a lot more ruthless, and the children of the House of the Hearth noticed their father becoming a lot colder and more distant.

𝑵𝒆𝒖𝒗𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆

You and Neuvillette had been married for years. You were his whole world and he loved you to pieces. However, one day you came down with an illness that was going around Fontaine and had already taken the lives of so many in Fontaine. Neuvillette knew better than anyone that you were strong, and he believed you could beat this. However, over the next few months you were just getting weaker and weaker and eventually it became clear that there was no way you were going to survive.

You had a peaceful death surrounded by your family, your friends and of course your beloved husband. Neuvillette didn't take your death well, he neglected his work duties for months and since you were close friends with Furina, Furina understood completely and gave Neuvillette as much time as he needed before he came back to work.

Eventually Neuvillette came back to work, but he kept to himself, he didn't talk much and completely shut himself off away from everyone. He never re married or found anyone else, he couldn't there was no way he could move on from you. You were his everything and he thought about you every day, wishing there was some way you could come back to him.

𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒎 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈!<𝟑 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒆𝒍𝒔𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒆𝒆!!

[sttoru]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 '𝐍 𝐁𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐒, CHAPTER II: you smuggle the wounded man into your dorm room and nurse him back to health in secret. a fragile bond forms between you and the stranger - whose name you learn is toji - as you spend your first night together.

word count. 6.6k-ish

tags. assassin!toji fushiguro x college student!female reader. sfw. bits of angst. mentions of blood, knives, murder. reader gets called 'woman'. general warnings: size difference. age gap (reader early 20's, toji early 30's). chapter one here

Three. Two. One.

You accept your miserable fate with a gulp. You prepare yourself for the unbearable pain that awaits your body until the last breath leaves your lungs. You hope the anguish lasts for a second or two before your vision turns pitch black. Before your soul meets its maker. Or before it gets lost somewhere more peaceful than this life you've led.

Closing your eyes, waiting for the impact, and uttering your final words in your head felt like eternity. Maybe the man is playing with your emotions before he decides to make an end to your life. Perhaps he is such a nasty psycho. And you can’t believe that out of all people who could’ve met him tonight on the street, you did.

You sniff. Life is unfair. Even at your final moments, you couldn’t help but feel you got the short end of the stick. You wait and wait, but your death doesn’t arrive. You sigh and ask whoever can hear your thoughts to make it quick.

“Shit,” Your ‘murderer’ coughs. It sounds like a painful cough, one that came out the back of his throat. You hear metal clattering on wet concrete not a second later. Your eyes shoot open at the sudden noise, your vision instantly filling with a frightening sight. You watch as the injured man starts to cough up blood. He’s unable to lift a finger in that state of his.

This is your chance to make a run for it. The voice in your head is screaming at you to move and get yourself to safety. It’s a perfect opportunity to get help. But something inside of you is urging you to stay.

Any normal person would have escaped by now.

‘I must be out of my mind,’ you silently think. You don’t loosen the grip you have on your scarf, the one pressed against the man’s open wound. Your body is yelling at you—begging you to move away—yet your heart is pleading to stay put. There is no way your body wins over the strong will of your heart. Your soul, that’s strangely connected to his, a man that threatened to kill you without hesitation.

You surely have lost your mind.

“Sir, oh my god,” you panic. You chose to stay, however have no clue what to do. You’re trying your best to think of a solution to all of this. Your eyes catch a glimpse of your now wet phone laying in a puddle of rain. You hope it still works. Well, even if it does, you surely can’t call an ambulance for the man. He had stated that he didn’t want any help.

If you consider the possibility of him being a murderer, you’d understand that he wouldn’t want an ambulance to be involved. You shake your head as your body desperately tries to continue fighting against your heart’s desires. ‘Sympathizing with a possible murderer. God I really must have gone insane,’ you curse yourself out in your head.

The sound of heavy breathing brings you back into the current moment. You catch the way the bloodied man is trying to regain his strength. You try to coax him into staying still, “sir, please don’t move. It could worsen your injury.”

You voicing your worries only causes the man to try and push you away. Despite his weakened state, the little push he gives you is enough to make you lose the grip on your crimson stained scarf. You watch in pure horror as more blood pours down his black shirt, onto his white pants.

“No, please. Please listen to me,” you don’t know why you’re begging a grown man, a killer, to listen to you for his own sake. You shouldn’t even be here. You should be back in your dorm room, in your cozy bed, watching a series while it pours outside. You shouldn’t be playing the hero to a stranger.

You think quickly. The only option you have aside from an ambulance, is to try and help him out to your best ability. You don’t have anything with you that could help, but you do have some rubbing alcohol in your dorm. That could work as a disinfectant. Stitching his wound up is the real challenge.

“Okay, uhm,” you try to think of a way to do this as smoothly as possible. You quickly grab the knife from the ground and shiver at the sight of the blood on the handle. Time is ticking and it won’t be long until the man in front of you loses his consciousness and possibly… dies.

You take off your coat, making haste to do so. Your hands are trembling, and your heart is stammering. You hiss as you tear apart the material of your coat using the sharp knife. The leather should help slow down the bleeding. Even if it’s only for a little bit. That’s all you really need.

“Here,” you quickly replace the scarf with the cut piece of your coat. You wrap it around his waist and fasten it, making sure it doesn’t slip off. The man does not say a word nor does he fight you off. All the resistance is gone from his weary body. That should tell you enough; he’s barely holding on. His heavy yet faint breathing is the only sign that reassures you that he’s not fallen unconscious.

You collect your bag and all the other things scattered on the dirty ground of the alleyway. You don’t want to leave any evidence of you being here, helping an alleged killer with getting away. Your heart tells you it’s fine, but your body is telling you that you’ll regret all of it. Time will tell which is the truth.

You stand up. Barely. Your knees are nearly giving out on you because of the stress and anxiety, though the adrenaline pumping through your blood is helping you stay composed. Your eyes follow the flow of the man’s blood as it mixes with the rainwater on the concrete. You can’t clean that up. The only thing you can do about it is pray—pray that the rain will wash all of it away. Down the drains.

“Are you okay?” You whisper, checking in on the stranger. He doesn’t answer. You crouch down in front of him, a worried expression on your face as you carefully move the hair from his eyes. They’re closed. You freak out and your initial reaction is to gently tap his cheek for any sign of life, “sir? Sir? Don’t tell me he’s—"

“Shut up,” his gruff voice echoes in your ears. It seems like he still wants you gone, though is not trying to actively shoo you away anymore. Not like he can in the awful state he is in.

The stranger coughs again, his eyelids opening just halfway before closing again. You sigh in relief and move next to him. You lift his arm so that it loosely sits on your shoulders. You grunt softly—the muscles in them makes it a tough job. You try asking him for his compliance, “I’ll help you stand up, okay?”

As expected, you’re met with silence. You take it as an agreement and use all the strength left in your limbs to get up on your feet. It’s a struggle, with you nearly toppling over thrice, but you eventually get the co-operation you’re looking for. The bloodied stranger slowly but surely manages to stand up straight with your aid.

You’re shocked by his large stature. He was intimidating enough when seated, but now that he’s towering over you, his aura is reaching high levels of unsettling. You hope he’s got enough drive left to move his feet. You can’t expect your frail arms to half carry a six-foot-something man.

“Hang in there,” you mutter, trying to cover the anxiety you’re internally facing. You look ahead and move forward in small strides, the steps you’re making are wobbly, as are his. You look up and try to gauge the man’s reactions, though his eyes are once again covered by his wet bangs. All you can make out is the slight twitch of his scarred lips. He’s in pain.

You manage to escape that damned back alley. Your bag is soaked, as are your clothes. You take one quick glance back before you turn the corner and once again pray that the rain washes the blood away. You take the quietest and fastest route back to your dorm.

A couple people pass you by. They don’t look at you funny nor do they bat an eye to the man you’re helping keep balance. They have their own lives that they need to take care of first. The pouring rain makes it harder for them to concentrate on anything else as well. Besides, the material of your coat wrapped around the man’s waist covers up most of the blood. It’s not visible to others.

If someone were to describe the image of the stranger and you from an outsider’s perspective, they’d think you’re just helping your drunk partner back home. It’s not an uncommon sight in the busy streets of Tokyo, especially in the evening.

“Where...” The stranger speaks up, his deep voice hoarser than before. He unexpectedly grips your shoulder. His meaty fingers digging into your flesh makes you wince. He’s only using a small bit of his actual strength and you’re already in pain. You push through and continue helping him forward. “Fuck,” He cusses. He’s starting to become deluded due to the blood loss and pain, “where ‘re—”

The tall man coughs, interrupting himself. You cringe at the sound of that excruciating sound. You could see the lights in the distance. The ones you’re used to seeing when coming back to campus after a night out with your friend. Now, you’re coming back with an unknown man. An alleged killer that you’re bringing into the building. You don’t even want to think about all the lives you could potentially put in danger.

You try to avert your attention. Now is not the time for that. Your gut feeling says so. You need to figure out a way to sneak this man inside your room without anyone finding out. Not the security guards, hall monitors or students: No one can know. You answer his question with clear doubt in your voice, not knowing if you’ll both even make it, “safety. To safety.”

All the thoughts about your poor life decisions get pushed to the side. You grunt and try to increase your speed, having difficulty dragging the man with you. You’re sweating. The amount of strength you need to put in to take only one step is severely draining. You remember that there is one path that doesn’t have much surveillance cameras hanging around. It’s the one you and a couple others use to sneak back into your dorms very late at night.

“Almost,” you try to encourage the stranger, whose silence is quite eerie. You hope he’s holding on. The way he’s dragging his feet over the bricks tells you that he’s trying to keep conscious. You hurry up and get to the hidden exit at the back.

It’s locked on some days, so you let out a breath of relief when you manage to push it open. That spares you the trouble of having to go through the main entrance and risk getting caught. Plus, you don’t have to use and show your student card now that you’ve infiltrated the building. You hope that there aren’t many people around this side, praying that they’re all eating dinner somewhere.

The creaking of the door is ten times louder than it is usually. Or it could be the fear in your body restructuring your thoughts. Luckily, your dorm room is only one flight of stairs up. You can’t take the elevator because of the cameras in it. You look over at the man leaning against your shoulder, his head tilting to the side in exhaustion.

“Christ,” The stranger grunts. His head sways a little closer to yours unintentionally and your breath hitches. For a split second, he rests the side of his head against yours, too tired to move away. It makes your heart stammer for a moment. To have this coldhearted man lean on you, depend on you, and lay his life in your hands.

You’re filled with another rush of adrenaline. “Are you still holding up okay?” your quiet voice snaps the man out of his disoriented state. He only then realizes that he’s leaning his heavy weight on your small stature. He grumbles and tilts his head the other way again, away from yours. He clearly hates to be vulnerable. Especially around a random girl he does not have any business with.

Without getting an answer back, you carefully make haste to your dorm room. Your room is the first one in the entire row, located the surveillance camera's dead zone, which works out in your favor again.

You hold in your breath and try to fish the keys out of your pocket. Your fingers move the old and now wet receipts and garbage to the sides, pulling the desired object out from between them. You fumble with the keys, your fingers trembling as you try to grab the right one.

The intimidating stranger looks down at your hand through a blurry vision. You’re in a hurry to open the door and avoid being caught. Someone could turn the corner right now and you’d be busted. He huffs in annoyance, though voices no audible complaints. As much as he doesn’t want to admit it, he knows you’re helping him and that you have zero ill intent.

“Sorry,” you whimper before finally unlocking your door. You hurriedly get in an shut it behind you. It feels like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. Figuratively in this case, since you still have a whole man leaning on you. You help him over to your bed and carefully assist him down.

You’re ignoring your own boundaries for the nth time. The ones you are so adamant to follow in any other situation. You would never let someone sit on your bed with their outside clothes still on, especially not if they’re dirtied and wet. You’re tolerating it for now. All for this man that you have a sudden, unfathomable attraction to.

You don’t have time to think. You rush to your wardrobe and pull the drawer open. You search for a first aid kit. You had it laying somewhere—though never used. Your parents had given you it in case of an emergency. Which is right now.

You find a whole bunch of gauze rolls and a bottle of antiseptic liquid along with bandages, scissors, and pain killers. You have zero clue on how to treat a wound. You only saw such stuff in action movies and cartoons. You grab a needle and thread that you had laying around. A towel and a tissue box as well. Just anything that’s redeemed relevant for the situation.

You drop everything on your bed and fiddle around on what to use first. You’re tempted to grab your phone and look up some instructions on the internet, but you quickly get interrupted by a bloody hand reaching out for the disinfectant. You watch with worry as the man gets to work—not expecting any help from an oblivious girl like you. He’s gone through this before.

“Get some water.” The man huffs, undoing the coat around his waist slowly. You only have a few seconds to act. You look around frantically and find an old water bottle on your nightstand. You hand it to him, and he nearly yanks it from your hand, still showing that stubborn reluctance around you. There’s not a thank you in sight as he gets to work.

You can tell that the stranger has stitched up his own wounds many times before. It makes you think back to your initial thoughts. The thoughts about his occupation. His skills would be self-explanatory if he were to be an actual murderer. Having to deal with these types of wounds would be an everyday experience.

Yet, instead of being alarmed at the possibility, you manage to feel bad for his situation. You helplessly watch as he pours nearly the entire bottle on his wound, getting rid of any debris that’s got on it. He clearly does not care about the wet stains it’s created on your sheets. They’re messy anyway. “Give me that,” the injured man comments and nods at the needle and thread with his head.

You do as told, staying silent as you let the professional do what he knows is best. He cleans the needle with the antiseptic fluid and prepares the wound some more. You want to advise him to at least use some pain killers before he goes to work on it, however they’d take too long to take effect. There is no time to do all of that.

“Ah,” you hiss, like you’re the one experiencing the pain, as you notice how he’s starting the suture near the edge of his wound. You squeeze your eyes shut and turn your head to the side, not wanting to witness the gruesome scene. A few occasional grunts and groans sounding from the man leave you nauseous. You can’t imagine what he’s going through at the moment, cleaning and stitching up his own injury. He seemed to know what he was doing, so you don’t comment on it any further.

After a couple seconds pass, you hear another pained hiss. You can’t stand it. You’re just sitting at the edge of your bed, hoping for the best. Hoping that he could make use of all that you provided him with. “Can I help somehow?” You breathlessly ask, your voice a quiet whisper.

“Yeah, by shutting up,” The older man answers bluntly. He’s fixated on healing his wound the best he could, and your voice is disrupting that focus. He’s made some progress with the suture. It isn’t done under perfect circumstances, but he’s used to it. His body has been through enough since childhood to have built up a resilience to most things. The pain and discomfort are nothing he isn’t familiar with.

You bite your lip and apologize for asking him something, “sorry.” His deep voice makes you shiver. It only reminds you of the fact that you have a grown man in your room. A possible killer on the loose. You don’t push your luck and just remain silent. You don’t want to end up as another victim.

Though you have a feeling that he wouldn’t hurt you. Where that feeling came from, you have no idea. It could be your delusions, however you’re sure he wouldn’t harm a hair on your head. Maybe it’s due to that little moment of vulnerability he showed in the halls moments ago. Your body warms up at the memory of how his head laid against yours for a split second.

The man finishes off the suture with a firm surgeon knot. He cleans the remaining blood with the tissues he’s drowned in disinfectant. You look his way again when you hear him shifting in his place. Your baffled as you notice how he’s trying to stand up. You don’t know much about wounds, but you know for certain that someone cannot stand up after getting an injury stitched. It could reopen the wound.

Your hand moves on its own. You firmly grab the man’s wrist and tug him back down on your bed. The stranger lets out a surprised grunt and instinctively slaps your hand away. He wants to leave.

To him, it’s nothing serious. This is just another day in his life. He’s used to ignoring his body’s pleas for rest. Vulnerability does not look good on him. He hates it.

The older man parts his lips to defend himself, yet quickly decides on the opposite. He shuts his mouth once his eyes met your pretty ones. They’re glimmering with tears. He does not realize why you’re suddenly so upset. Nor does he actually care... He thinks.

He just wants to leave before you ask too many questions. It’s best to act like you two have never met. For his sake and yours.

You stare at each other for a few seconds. The silence creates an undeniable tension between you both. You don’t exchange words, though you think he knows what you mean with that look you’re giving him. You’re indirectly begging him to stay still and rest. You know he needs it. He secretly knows he needs it as well, though does not want to acknowledge that weakness.

The stranger sighs in frustration. He looks down at the wound he’s worked hard to patch up. His head hurts. His eyelids are heavy. His limbs are unresponsive. He has no other choice but to lay back. He promises himself that he’d leave after an hour or two. He wants to have nothing to do with you.

A college girl helping him. Who would’ve thought that day would come. Did he become that weak? He has always refused the help of others, so what would make this any different? He can leave and deal with the consequences of that poor decision on his own. However, his body doesn’t move an inch.

The man frowns as he realizes that his cold and distant attitude would get him nowhere this time. His body is actively resisting the urges to leave.

You cautiously ascertain his reactions. You notice the way he slumps back against your pillows with a curse word leaving his lips. You can’t help but feel relieved. You don’t know why, but you’re happy that he’s staying with you. Even if it’s just for a little longer. You want to make sure he’s going to be fine.

You nod silently and don’t say a word for a good while. You don’t want to annoy the man more than you already have. You get up, knees buckling as the adrenaline wears you down. You’re glad you haven’t been caught and that the man you saved didn’t die. You’re tired from everything that went down in the last hour or so.

Though, you cannot rest.

You clean up the mess around your bed. The used, bloody tissues. The rain that’s dripped down your clothes and onto the floor, making small puddles on the surface. The piece of leather you had used as a temporary solution for the stranger’s bleeding. After you’ve gotten rid of all that, you finally take off your coat and shoes. You want to take a bath as soon as possible. And dry your hair.

You don’t take your eyes off the man on your bed. He’s starting to stir again, which could mean one of two things. He’s either trying to escape or trying to change his position. To your surprise, you catch him pull his shirt over his head. The older man’s ripped physique comes into view. Faint veins run down his beefy arms, his abs are perfectly defined, and his waist compliments his bulky stature.

You’re staring. You only realize it when your eyes catch the way he’s attempting to wrap some gauze around his lower abdomen. You can tell that he’s struggling, but he does not ask for help. Nor does he even look your way—acting like it’s just him in the room. It’s easy to conclude that he’s never depended on anyone in his life. It saddens you.

You walk over to your bed and sit down at the edge. You wordlessly reach out to grab the roll of gauze from his hand. Your fingers brush against his palm while you do so, and you can feel the rough calluses on his skin. You don’t comment on it but make a mental note of your discovery.

You carefully wrap the gauze around his waist once. You’re as cautious as you could be, not wanting to inflict any more discomfort on the stranger. He doesn’t resist. He’s too tired to do so. Alhough, that doesn’t stop him from showing his complaints about the situation through his distant body language. His eyes are staring at the nearby wall, his expression as stoic as ever.

You go around with the roll of gauze once more. You lean a bit closer to his torso to properly do your job. You can’t help but feel a tiny bit embarrassed by your proximity. Neither of you says anything about it. He doesn’t move away, and you take that as a sign to continue tending to him.

The older man can’t help but feel that urging desire to push you away and leave. He doesn’t want to be involved in any of this. You weren’t supposed to find him. You weren’t supposed to help him. You weren’t supposed to bring him back here. He hates the idea of letting someone – you - get close to him. He hates letting others in his personal space.

 “What’s your name, sir?” Your soothing voice breaks the silence. You’re still visibly nervous, but also a lot less panicky. He finally looks down at you, seeing you put the gauze in place before grabbing a roll of bandages. He hates your touch.

The stranger clenches his jaw. He had to have scared you away in that back alley. He couldn’t and that’s what got him in such a predicament. One that triggers his many internal issues and struggles. He hates having to talk about himself to others. That’s how most bonds form.

“None of your damn business, girl,” The older man growls. His tone is harsh and cold, but you don’t back away nor even flinch. That only serves to irk him more. You’re meant to cower in fear, leave him alone and never turn back, but you do the complete opposite. You don’t know him and yet still choose to take care of him.

You nod, not pushing the matter any further. The injured stranger narrows his eyes for a second. Nothing seems to work on you. His intention is to scare you off, though the more he tries, the more you seem to get closer. It’s got the total opposite effect and he despises it.

He hates it all. Your closeness, your need to help him, your eyes that stare up at him with such worry, your hands bandaging him up. He promised himself, the day his wife died a couple years ago, that he’ll never involve himself with people if it isn’t for business related matters.

He’s managed to live all by himself for all those years and reached a level of independence that others could only dream of. Now it’s shattered. It feels like he’s back to square one because of your choice today. The choice to help a total random stranger.

The older man closes his eyes for a second and sighs deeply. It’s foolish of him to think of such unimportant matters. He’ll just use this to his advantage. He’ll use you, your kindness and everything you have to offer for his own sake. He’ll exploit you like he’s done to many other women before. That’s the way he’s used to treating others.

He’ll indulge your need to help him and try to act nice to satisfy those innocent wishes of yours. Just for his sake and his sake only, he promises himself.

The older man eventually speaks up again after you managed to bandage him up properly, “…Toji.”

You raise your eyebrows. You guess that that’s his name. Your lips curl up into a faint smile, feeling thankful that Toji decided to reveal that little detail about him. You grab his bloodied shirt and put it with the rest of your clothes that you need to wash. Your eyes wander over his exposed upper body for a split second, looking for any other possible injuries, only to find none. You nod in satisfaction as you grab a washcloth and wet it with some water, “that’s a nice name.”

That’s a first. Toji didn’t see the significance of complimenting someone’s name. Everyone has one, it’s not special, so why would you tell him it’s nice? Maybe he just doesn’t understand sentimental stuff like that. He’s not made out for such things. “Hm,” he lets out a small hum in acknowledgement and that’s all you get.

You walk towards him again and brush his bangs to the side. Toji holds himself back from moving away from your touch, but then remembers the decision he made mentally just moments ago. He’ll use that kindness of yours to his advantage until he’s all healed up. Then he’ll leave for good.

You place the cold cloth on his forehead. You know he’ll have a fever throughout the night because of the wound he’s suffered. You’re simply preparing him for that. You grab the painkillers that are scattered around the bed and place them on your nightstand, along with the water bottle. If he needs it, he’ll grab it, you think.

“Ah, sorry,” You snap out of it and realise that you haven’t introduced yourself properly. You might as well, considering you’ll be having Toji as your roommate for a couple days. Or at least you hope he stays that long until he’s all healed up. You continue, “my name is..”

“I already know.” Toji cuts you off before you’re able to reveal your name. You’re dumbfounded for a second. What does he mean by ‘he knows’? You tilt your head in confusion. You try to figure out how he could’ve possibly learnt your name but are unable to make any assumptions.

Toji easily notices your bewilderment. He admits that that could’ve come over as extremely creepy. He looks at the nearby wall and points at the decorations with his chin. You follow his gaze and instantly recognize what he’s staring at. It’s a picture with your friends that you have framed. They gifted it to you some time back and had engraved your name in the frame.

Toji must have cautiously examined his new surroundings whilst you were busy finalizing the treatment for his injury. You understand the need for that. Anyone would be wary in a new environment. “Hehe. Right,” he’s quite observant, you think to yourself.

You look outside of your window and close the tiny gap between your curtains. Even if you’re on the second floor, you don’t want to risk anyone finding out about what you did tonight. It still hasn’t properly processed in your brain; the fact that you have smuggled an alleged killer into your dorm. Maybe it will hit once you sleep and wake up tomorrow.

You look down at Toji with great concern. Even if the wound has been taken care of, you’re unsure if it’s even enough. A doctor would’ve been the safest option. But seeing how great Toji is handling the pain, you guess that it’ll be just fine. You glance at your hands. They have some dried blood on them. You also reek of the rain since you’re still uncomfortably soaked from before.

You decide to go take a shower. Before that, you make sure Toji has everything he needs. You give him a towel to dry himself off and make sure he can reach the first aid kit if needed. You stare at the pile of bloodied and wet clothes in the corner of your room. Both his and yours. You’ll take them to the laundry mat tomorrow.

You avert your attention back to Toji. He’s lying on his back, head turned away to the wall so he wouldn’t have to see you or look you in the eyes. It’s like he’s in his own world. You speak up again, this time a little louder, “are you gonna be alright now?”

Silence again. Toji doesn’t face you and keeps his eyes closed for some peace of mind. He sounds indifferent and distant as he answers you, “who knows.”

The ambiguous answer certainly doesn’t help ease your anxiety. You don’t want the older man to regress back to a state of near unconsciousness again. Despite your wishes, you can’t do much about it. Calling an ambulance or asking for help from others is a big no-no. For you as well, since you’ll be dragged into a big mess if anyone were to find out you gave shelter to a murderer.

“Uhm, all right. I’m gonna take a quick shower.” You announce quietly, not expecting a response. You would’ve preferred it if Toji did respond so you could leave your room for a couple minutes in peace. Without worrying about his condition. You know that you’re annoying him with the constant questions and comments, but you can’t help it. You’re worried. Even if he hates the attention and would love to have as less interaction with you as possible.

“D-Don’t move, ‘kay? I’ll be back.” You add quickly. You take a few steps towards the exit and place your hand on the door handle. Your limbs won’t take another step forward. You’re worried sick that Toji’s going to grab his chance and leave the moment you’re gone. You don’t want him to go. On one hand, it’s selfish of you, but on the other hand, it’s out of consideration for his situation.

You turn your head and glance at his still figure on your bed. His bulky stature nearly took up the entirety of it. You can’t help but ramble about your worries to him, hoping it’d convince him to stay, “If they find you, I’ll get in trouble and god knows what will happen to yo—”

“Just go, woman.” Toji’s deep voice rings through your ears. It’s the second time he’s cut you off. You’re pissing him off, clearly. You immediately zip it and do as told. You decide to put your trust in him and believe that he won’t take the opportunity to leave behind your back.

Without another word, you sneak out of your dorm room, making sure to close your door behind you. You act normal in case anyone walks by and finds your behaviour suspicious. You make a beeline towards the communal showers with your toiletry bag and pyjamas in hand.

Meanwhile, Toji is finally experiencing some real peace. He empties his mind, though cannot seem to get rid of your voice. He still can’t comprehend why somebody would be this worried for him. A college student who’d be at risk of being expelled if found out. You’re taking such great risks for a man like him? He doesn’t understand.

Toji rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands and groans in aggravation, “unbelievable.” Why he’s thinking it through is also something he cannot grasp. The man decides to enjoy the quiet atmosphere for now. He’s still somewhat disheveled from the entire ordeal and if he were to keep his brain running, he’d lose his mind completely. He drapes an arm over his eyes and lies there silently on the soft mattress.

A couple minutes pass. You feel like you’ve taken the quickest shower ever. You avoid as many students as possible while you make your way back to your dorm. You close your eyes and take a deep breath in. You open the door and peek through the crack. It’s pitch dark in the room. The sun had fully set a while back and your curtains cover any light from outside.

You lock your door and step forward carefully. You squint and wait for your vision to accommodate to the darkness. You approach your bed and finally let out that breath you’ve been holding in. He’s still there. Toji’s still where you left him. His chest is slowly moving up and down, his breathing steady as he rests.

You quietly turn on the nightlamp in your room. It casts a faint shadow over Toji’s face. He seems to be asleep. You can’t quite tell for sure since his bicep is nearly covering the entirety of his face, but you judge based on his breathing patterns. You sit on the edge of your bed and feel tired yourself after that eventful evening. You’re sleepy. The adrenaline has worn off and exhausted you to no end.

You glance down at the bandage around his torso. You’d have to change that for him tomorrow. For now, you’re content with the outcome of it all. You shift in your seat, which causes your hand to brush against Toji’s on the bed. You feel the warmth creep up to your head. His veiny hands still had stains of blood on the skin.

Now that Toji’s asleep, he won’t refuse your help. You grab a spare washcloth from your wardrobe and wet it with some water. You carefully lift Toji’s left hand. His palm touches yours and you find yourself enjoying the physical contact. His hand is heavy—bigger and rougher than yours. There are faint scars on his fingers which reminds you of his unknown identity.

All you’ve discovered until now is his name. His background is a mystery, and you have the feeling that it’s going to stay a mystery. You’ve realized by now that Toji does not open up to just anyone. You diligently clean the crimson stains from his left hand and move to do the same for the right one. You’re as careful as you can be, not wanting to wake the injured man from his well-deserved rest.

Once done, you put the washcloth away. You yawn and look at the clock. It’s nearly midnight already. You can’t sleep on your bed since it’s occupied, and it doesn’t fit two people. You look down at the soft carpet below your feet. That’ll have to do.

You grab an available pillow and a spare blanket, setting up your own little sleeping bag on the carpet right next to the bed. You lay down and stare at the ceiling. The ticking of your clock and the occasional sound of traffic outside of the building are the only loud sounds that distract your mind from any turbulent thoughts.

All you want is to sleep. What’ll happen tomorrow or the day after that is a problem for later. You’re safe for now. For today, you can relax. Your door is locked and the man you saved hadn’t left just yet. You feel a strange form of comfort having him with you. Even if he may be a bad person, his presence somehow soothes your tired body and mind. You feel like you’re safe with him. No harm shall come your way tonight.

And with that decisive thought, you close your eyes and give in to the slumber. You turn to lay on your side, facing the frame of your bed. Facing Toji.

You smile and utter your final words for the day, “good night, Toji. Sleep well.”

You drift into the land of dreams and discard your eventful reality. Little did you know that the man on your bed had been wide awake the entire time and is now left unable to sleep. . .

to be continued !

[dead-boys-club]

†  kisses : shigaraki.

❥ scenario: kissing tomura. ❥ no triggers; not rated. ❥ i don't have any beta readers - you get what you get. ❥ requested! it is a whole mess.

❥ series: tomura - izuku

✧*̥˚ some stuff *̥˚✧

tomura comes off as a rather aloof person; someone with many walls and deep rooted trust issues. so, if you're kissing me, we can already assume your relationship to him is one build over a good amount of time. it would be a very, very intensely personal experience for him. he's not used to physical touch by any means, so it would put him in an almost awkward mindset. he probably wouldn't fully know how to process being so.. ( god, i use this word a lot, i'm sorry ) vulnerable and close.

kissing him would be soft and slow. he would be hesitant, like you were something fragile, also trying not to fuck something up. he's navigating something new, so it would take time for him to get the hang of it. and, it would make him smile - which is a feat all in it's own. he would show you this small, gentle smile; a genuine expression of warmth and adoration that's incredibly rare.

i can't even put into words how soft this man would be over kisses. and, he's not going to be picky once he gets the hang of it. he would really, really enjoy:

moth kisses

forehead kisses

jaw kisses

slow make out sessions

in the beginning, he would ( idk, is this surprising? ) not be in control of shit. he would actually hand the reigns over to you and enjoy the ride.

the thing is, he's a really good kisser???? because any time he kisses you, he's kissing you like it's the very last time. he's got a hand on the back of your neck, fingers settled against when your hair stops, just.. drowning in the intimacy of the moment. his other hand gripping onto your shirt at your side - he'd have hell letting go.

he's obsessed. and, honestly, unless he's in a foul mood, it's the best way to distract or help him feel better. though, i should add, i feel as though he'd become just a tad bit clingy towards you once you made it to this level of intimacy.

if i keep going, i'm going to go down a rabbit hole of trapping him on the couch and kissing him til neither of you can breathe, SO - i'm going to slide down into a scenario.

✧*̥˚ tiny things *̥˚✧

❥ moth kisses: ( so, do you remember the last time we actually saw him play a game? no? me either but- ) moth kisses are mostly to attempt to annoy him, which.. may only actually work once or twice. the type of kisses you give when interrupting him. when you just cup his face and kiss all over, quickly, not giving him a chance to do anything about it.

❥ forehead kisses: god, please, give him forehead kisses. he really appreciates them in the morning or before bed, the way you brush his hair aside and linger for a moment. i feel like this is a gesture that really makes him understand that you're there for a reason. and you're genuine.

❥ jaw kisses: when he's working on things, you generally know better than to fuck with him too much. so, as you're tucked up beside him, that's when you nose and press little kisses to his jaw. you try not to jostle him too much.

❥ temple kisses +: this is more of something he does for you. because it starts as temple kisses, his eyes closed as he layers kisses over the spot for a few seconds. he'll slowly move down until he's nosing at the spot behind your earlobe, either humming or whispering little things. very much a private moment that no one else sees.

❥ the aforementioned slow make outs: usually when this happens, he's either tired or it started because he was in a shit mood. he likes how it starts as just small kisses and then turns into closing his eyes, lungs clenching, need building but it's still going so slowly, it's nearly killing him.

❥ the one time you almost died: because it was in the middle of a fight. it wasn't your fault that when you caught his gaze, you both seemed to stop. however, when you plant an unexpected kiss on his lips before disappearing into the fray once more, he's briefly distracted and a little agitated. you were being reckless but fuck if he didn't continue on with wanting more of you.

✧*̥˚ first kiss *̥˚✧

withdrawn.

that was somewhat normal but he seemed even further gone than usual. his responsibilities and the pressure on his shoulders, it was starting to wear on him and you could see it. the way he sank into the arm chair, picking at the hem and staring off into space. it wasn't something you enjoyed seeing.

you shift from your spot by the doorway, approaching to settle on the armrest of his chair, lifting his hand into your hold. a few minutes past in silence, neither of you feeling the need to say anything. you could see some sense of helplessness behind his eyes, making you frown and squeeze his hand. he didn't pull away despite how he flinched, fingers curling into the touch.

'tomura..' you said softly, not really know what could be said in the moment, considering he'd never done too well with encouraging talk. 'i'm here, you know?'

it took him a second before his head turned, guarded expression briefly flickering to give way to something softer. he didn't say anything, gratitude seen in his gaze. it wasn't hard to identify the conflict going on behind his eyes, something you knew you couldn't do much to fix or aid in. the most you could do was attempt to distract.

you didn't think about it too much, or at all, when you began to lean closer, the distance between you shrinking quicker than your mind could keep up. you were really leaning far too close into the personal space of one of the most dangerous men you knew and couldn't really stop. your heart felt like it was in your throat the moment your lips pressed against his own. the kiss was tender and hesitant, lasting only for a moment.

when you pulled back, you weren't sure how to act. his eyes were slightly wide with bewilderment, frozen and free hand anchoring him to reality with it's grip to the armchair. 'why...?' he began, barely above a whisper, not trusting his voice. you could hear the confusion, clear as day, but beneath it - there was something else. the smallest note of longing.

his voice completely erased the mild panic that had grown and you just smiled, light and careful. 'because you matter to me? because i adore you. and, i want to be there for you.. in any way that i can be.'

you weren't expecting to make a confession and he surely wasn't expecting to receive one. thankfully, he didn't respond to that. 'thank you,' was all he managed to get out, taking in the words and warmth that spread through him at the kiss.

the room fell quiet once more, though the atmosphere shifted into something new. there was a newfound understanding created from the simple, yet profound, moment of intimacy.

and, it would only grow from that moment on.

[rafesangelita]

₊˚⊹˚ 𐙚 24

PAIRING: dark!rafe x fem!pogue!reader

SUMMARY: ❝there’s only 24 hours in a day, and half of those you lay awake with thoughts of murder and carnage.❞ — when you accidentally witness rafe commit a murder, he’s willing to do everything he has to do in order to make sure there’s no loose ends. even if that means tracking you down and killing you himself.

WARNINGS: predator/prey dynamic, murder, descriptions of violence and blood, time skips (just hours apart), choking (not the good kind), rafe quite literally tries to kill you, it kinda gives stockholm syndrome ngl

WORD COUNT: 3.1k

LINK: series masterlist

hour one - 9:00 PM

“i can’t believe you talked me into taking this short cut to the boneyard, this is creepy as fuck.” you shivered, regretting your shoe choice as the gravel crunched underneath your sandals. “you’ll be here in no time, i swear! did you pass that abandoned house on the left already?” you froze, glancing back at the isolated dirt path. “girl- i haven’t seen anything since i turned this way like fifteen minutes back.” your friend gasped on the other end of the line. “where the hell are you then?!” lizzie yelled, attempting to shout over the music in the background.

“you tell me!” you cursed under your breath when you got a low battery notification. “look, my phone is about to die, i’ll try to call when i get closer.” you hung up, spotting a clear field to cut through. up in the distance you could see what looked like headlights. “thank god.” you sighed, making your way over in hopes of getting a ride out of here. as you got closer, you started rethinking your decision when two men came into your view, one pushing the other onto the ground. “what the fuck?” you whispered to yourself, your heart dropping as the man that was standing up pulled out a gun.

“please don’t do this! i’ll never steal from you again, man. i swear!” you were stuck, your feet not moving no matter how hard you tried. “you didn’t just steal from me, you stole from my family.” the cock of the gun was loud enough for your heart to beat wildly in your chest. “please, i’m begging you!” terror flooded through your system when the man on his knees glanced up, pointing a finger at you before the sound of a chamber being emptied pierced through the chilly night air. you jumped, covering your ears as they rung. the man fell with a thud, the realization of what you’ve just seen made your breath catch in your throat.

“hey!” the guy with the gun started running towards you, sending a shock of fear down your spine as you stumbled back. you whimpered when the palms of your hands landed on the bed of grass below you, the man’s footsteps only getting closer with each second you stayed on the ground. finally, when he was close enough for you to make out his face, you bolted in the opposite direction, a scream leaving your lips when he grabbed a handful of your hair, pulling you against his front as he breathed against your skin. “you shouldn’t have seen that.” he traced your arm with the cold metal of his gun. “please, i won’t tell anyone, i was just trying to get to a party when i saw your truck. i thought you could help me out.” you whimpered.

“thought i could help you out?” he repeated, turning you around in his grip, “you’ve seen my truck, and now you’ve seen my face. i don’t want to do this but your pretty little self was just at the wrong place at the wrong time.” tears welled in your eyes as he held the gun up to your head. “i won’t go to the cops, i promise!” you cried, hands wrapping around his wrist. “i’ll forget all of this even happened.” truth be told, he really didn’t want to kill you. the second you saw his eyes soften, you knee’d him in the groin, pushing him in the chest as you took the gun from his hand. “sorry, not sorry!” you shouted, running as fast as you can while he groaned in pain. “you stupid fucking bitch!” he yelled, punching the ground in frustration.

you put the gun on safety mode, throwing it in your purse as you ran and didn’t stop until you reached what looked like the beach. sure enough as you got closer, you could hear the cheer of nearby partygoers. you sighed in relief, making your way to the center where lizzie and jj were sitting down at. “oh my god, are you alright?!” your best friend wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into a hug while jj examined you closely. “dude, you look like you just climbed out of the woods or something.” you rolled your eyes at his words. “thanks, jayj.” you sat down, contemplating if whether or not you should tell lizzie what happened.

“i texted you like fifteen minutes ago to check on you!” she hit your arm playfully. your phone. you quickly patted yourself down, subtly looking through your small purse for the device, only to realize that you might’ve dropped it during the whole ‘escape from the killer!’ fiasco. “oh, fuck.” you whispered to yourself, lizzie and jj already back in their own little love bubble. meanwhile just on the other side of the island, rafe was seated in his truck, still sore from you kicking him in his manhood. he didn’t dwell on it too much, everything he needed to physically get ahold of you currently sat in the palm of his hand.

not only did rafe have your phone, but when he took off your phone case just to see your state id wrapped in a twenty dollar bill, he also had your full name along with your address.

hour ten - 7:00 AM

you barely slept a wink last night. after you got home from the party, you showered with the bathroom door open, way too paranoid to go over five minutes without looking out the window. you glanced at your purse, still not being able to bring yourself to open it. the flash backs of the man’s lifeless body falling to the ground was enough to keep you up. now, with the morning sun flooding through your bedroom, you knew had to get up at some point and get yourself together. “fuck.” you rubbed your eyes, quickly brushing your teeth before making your way to the small kitchen. washing some dishes from the day before, you stared out the window as you got lost in your thoughts.

he doesn’t know my name, how could he even find me? what if he found my phone with my id in it? eh, he’s probably too busy burying a body to worry about me.

“ouch!” you hissed, looking down to see that you accidentally cut yourself with one of the kitchen knives. “snap out of it.” you sighed to yourself, sucking on your finger as you looked through one of the drawers for a band aid. just as you spotted one, your heart stopped when you heard the familiar crunch of gravel in the driveway. your worst nightmare coming true when you saw the same black truck from last night parked outside. “no, no, no, no, no,” you ran to the front door, where you were met with a loud bang. “open up, y/n.” you paced around nervously, having no phone to call anyone for help. “leave me alone! i didn’t go to the police last night, and i won’t go to them ever, okay? please leave.”

“i can’t do that. you have something of mine, and i want it back.” you shuddered at the sound of his voice. “if you give me my gun, you’ll get your phone back. easy trade off.” that explains why he knew your name and where you lived. “you have my phone?” you wiped your eyes, walking closer to the trailer door. “i sure do, babe.” you debated with yourself, your breath quickening with each second you stayed silent. “will you leave me alone after this?” you unlocked the small latch, your heart beating in your ears as you opened the door, revealing the, rather beautiful, psycho that tried to kill you yesterday. “i’ll leave you alone. promise.” his eyes danced over your body. you were just in a tank top and underwear.

“i’ll be right back.” you took a deep breath, grabbing the gun out of your purse before returning back to him. when you opened the door once more, he was no where to be seen. “you make this too easy for me.” he clamped a hand over your mouth as he dragged you out of the living room and into your bedroom where he shoved you into the wall. you had no idea where the gun was pointing to, but you still pulled the trigger in a last minute effort to defend yourself. both of you jumped back, a bullet hole now adorning a spot next to your bed frame. you held the gun up, your hand shaking as you aimed at his head. “where’s my phone?” all the fear in your body was now replaced by anger. he held his hands up in defense, his chest rising and falling with each breath.

“here,” he took the device out of his pocket, tossing it on your bed. “if i was going to rat you out i would’ve done it already,” you started, “this gun has my prints all over it, too. if i went to the cops with this i’d look just as guilty.” you watched as his face fell in realization. “i don’t even know your name.” you emptied the clip of the gun, the bullets falling to the floor with a clink. “rafe.” was all he said as you pushed the gun into his chest. “listen, rafe, i’m not a runner, i don’t run from anyone. you, however, killed somebody and i happened to witness it. that’s all. you got what you wanted now, so leave.” you grabbed your phone, walking past him to the kitchen.

“i believe you, but i can’t trust you. ‘not when i have too much to lose.” he followed you, unaware of the knife you had in your grip. “so make a move.” you turned around. rafe glanced at the knife in your hand, a smirk forming on his lips. “i’m into knifeplay, don’t threaten me with a good time.” he charged at you, knocking the weapon out of your grasp. before you could react, he wrapped a hand around your throat, lifting you up onto the counter as he started choking you out. your eyes widened while you frantically reached to the side for anything to hit him with. just as your vision started getting hazy, you felt the cast iron of your skillet on the stovetop, swinging it across his head. he fell instantly, his eyes fluttering shut as he his body slumped against the floor.

you rubbed the skin of your neck, tears running down your face as you fought to catch your breath. “oh, shit.” you whimpered, leaning down to check if he had a pulse. still alive, dammit. you leaned against the wall, trying to come up with something fast before he woke up. thirty minutes later, and you had him tied to a chair in the middle of your living room. “this will have to do.” you sighed, sticking a piece of tape over his mouth.

hour eighteen - 3:00 PM

“what the fuck?” rafe’s voice was raspy when he woke up, his eyes widening slightly as he spotted you staring at him from the couch. “what time it is?” he groaned, nearly knocking his chair over at how hard he was thrashing in it. “three o’ clock, which means you’ve been knocked out cold for eight hours.” you blinked. “eight hours?! what the fuck happened?” he looked around. you couldn’t help the scoff that left your lips. “what happened? you started choking me like a crazy person and i hit you with a skillet before you could actually kill me.” you moved closer, showing him the purple marks that now adorned your neck. apart of him hated that he did it, but it was too late to take it back now.

he licked his lips, cringing at the weird taste. “did i have tape on my mouth?” he grimaced. “yes, but you started breathing weird so i took it off.” you walked to the kitchen, rafe’s eyes glued to the way your jeans hugged your ass. “can you untie me?” he sighed when he heard you laugh. “not a chance,” you came back to the living room with a water bottle and a chair. “we’re gonna talk first before i let you go anywhere.” you took a seat in front of him, your knees knocking against his. you opened the water bottle, bringing it up to his lips. “i choked the shit out of you and you wanna give me water?” if he felt like crap before, he felt even worse now. “do you want it or not?” he nodded.

you hated how attractive you found him, the way he was gazing up at you right now made butterflies flutter in your tummy. once he hummed that he had enough, you leaned back in your seat. “before you shot that guy last night you said he stole something from your family. what was it?” rafe sighed, shaking his head. “why should i tell you?” he scoffed. “i’ll answer whatever questions you ask me in return.” you leaned forward, your cleavage making him uncomfortably hard in his cargo shorts. “any question?” you tilted your head. “yes, but answer mine first.” you ignored the smirk that lifted in the corner of his lips. “he stole gold,” rafe cleared his throat, “like a shit ton of it.” he swallowed.

“did you get it back?” you peered up at him through your eyelashes, completely oblivious to the tent in his shorts, or so he thought. “of course i did.” you shivered at the deep baritone of his voice. rafe knew both of you were treading dangerous territory as your looks started lingering a second longer, your fingers tracing his chin everytime he asked for more water. “what does one do with that much gold? when they’re already rich, i mean.” you licked your lips, resting your cheek in the palm of your hand. “get more richer.” he shrugged. “my turn.” rafe cleared his throat.

“you can’t go to the cops, and you can’t leave me tied here forever. what are you gonna do?” you sighed, spending the last eight hours asking yourself the same thing. “i don’t know, rafe. if i let you go, you might try to kill me again.” he watched you carefully, guilt settling in his gut. “i won’t do anything, i swear i’ll-” you cut him off, “you said that last time.” rafe’s eyes flickered down to your neck, his jaw clenching. “nah, you have my word.” even though he looked sincere, you knew better than to give in right away. “no.” you got up, grabbing your purse as you made your way to the front door. “woah, where are you going?” rafe started pulling at the restraints, shouting after you as you walked out your trailer.

hour twenty three - 8:00 PM

the last thing you expected to see when you got home was rafe lying on his side, staring at nothing as you rushed over to help him up. “what the hell?” you grunted, pulling the chair up. “i tried to get out of this.” he looked completely defeated as you pulled your hair out of your face. “yeah, i can see that,” you placed the bag of food you had on the kitchen table, returning with a pair of scissors. “y/n, it’s been well over a day since my last meal, just let me go i swear i’ll be out of your hair.” he swallowed dryly. kneeling down on the floor, you started cutting the ropes from the chair, mumbling a ‘don’t make me regret this.’

rafe stared wide eyed as you set him free, immediately backing away from him as he rolled his shoulders back. “your keys are on the small table by the front door.” you were practically trembling with fear when he loomed over you. with a gentle hand, he softly traced your face, his fingers trailing down your neck to touch the bruises there. “i’m sorry.” rafe whispered. not knowing how to respond, you simply blinked with a small nod. “i got you something to eat in the kitchen,” you motioned towards the white paper bag with a burger and fries in it. rafe looked at you as if he couldn’t believe you were real.

“you bought me food?” you relaxed when he stepped away, his hands on his head as he slowly paced back and forth. “yes..” your voice came out small. rafe was quiet for a minute before he looked at you with a look that sent shivers down your spine, except this time it wasn’t out of terror. “do you want to play a game, y/n?” he eyed your frame, loving the way your tits looked in that pretty tube top of yours. “i’m kind of tired of games, don’t you think we’ve played cat and mouse long enough?” you smiled softly when he laughed. “while you do have a point, this is a game that you win regardless.” rafe watched as you let your hair down from it’s claw clip, “why not?”

“i’m sure you’re familiar with hide and seek?” your eyebrows knitted in confusion. “of course i’m familiar, but why that one?” you questioned. “well here’s the thing; i’m gonna count to sixty and give you one minute to hide. if i don’t find you in two minutes, you’ll never have to worry about me showing up at your doorstep again, but if i do find you.. i fuck you.” you were immediately taken aback, your heart pounding in your ears as he got close to you once again. any normal person would immediately reject, not even giving it a second thought before declining, but a large part of you was thrilled at the idea of being hunted down. only when your life didn’t actually depend on it, of course.

you looked up at him, taking your bottom lip between your teeth as a nervous habit. “okay.” rafe smiled devilishly. “run.” his eyes were dark when the word left his mouth. “w-what?” you stuttered, panic coursing through your veins. “i said fucking run.” he said through gritted teeth, your feet moving as he started counting down. you ran into the bedroom, cursing under your breath as you look around for a concealed hiding spot. you lived in a trailer for god’s sake, you had limited space. choosing your best bet, you squeezed into your closet, bringing your knees up to your chest as the words ‘ready or not, here i come!’ echoed in your ears.

you could hear shuffling in the bathroom and the kitchen, your eyes screwing shut as his foot steps got closer to your room. rafe was already a minute down. just as you thought he was going to walk away, the door to your closet swung open.

hour twenty four - 9:00 PM

“gotcha.”

[babyangelsky]

My Favorite QL Kisses of 2024 💖✨

Welcome to Babyangelsky's 2024 Wrap Up! To commemorate my second year of watching QL dramas, and my first year of actually talking on my blog, I've compiled a series of lists to celebrate all the QL things I loved this year!

Please feel free to take my categories and make lists of your own and tag me in them if you do!

💜 All the lists can be found here! 💜

From horny kisses to sweet kisses, lip kisses to hand kisses, and everything in between, these were my favorites of the year. A few couples feature twice but that doesn't mean I love the others any less, it just means I couldn't decide between two.

♡ Rak x Mut Blinding Blue Jellyfish Light of Love Kiss (Love Sea)

Fort and Peat are such good on-screen kissers that I could've honestly chosen any other kiss from this show and it would've been amazing but! Blinding light of love kisses are my favorite kisses so it had to be this one.

♡ God x Diew Pilot Kiss (Monster Next Door)

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I WISH THIS KISS HAD MADE IT INTO THE SHOW. THIS KISS SINGLE-HANDEDLY CONVINCED ME TO EVEN WATCH THE SHOW IN FIRST PLACE.

Pilot kiss you will always be famous.

♡ Jack x Joke First Kiss (Jack & Joker)

Now THAT is how you resolve the tension. Sometimes the slow burn is really a slow fuse and at the end you get a very hungry, very horny explosion. Thank you, YinWar.

♡ Gi Seop x Jin Woo Under the Bed Kiss (Boys Be Brave!)

There's just something about this scene that really made it stick with me. It means everything to me that Jin Woo was the one to kiss first after he spent so much time and energy trying to run away from his feelings. I always love when I can see the exact moment someone gives in.

♡ Yuan x Qian Morning After Kisses (Unknown)

Quite possibly one of my favorite morning after scenes ever. Tender and sleepy and soft and filled with the relief of finally having something you've wanted your entire life but never believed you could have.

♡ Korn x Tonkla Reunion Kiss (4 Minutes)

Did I spend the entire show wanting Tonkla to kill Korn? Absolutely, and I still wish he had but you know what? Tonkla wanted Korn and I want Tonkla to get everything he wants in this life. Also it was just a really damn good kiss.

♡ Vivi x Mook Couch Kiss (Love Sea)

Vivi could neither communicate her feelings effectively nor follow her own excellent advice but what she could do was kiss the breath out of Mook and do it very well.

♡ Haruki x Jin Playground Kiss (Our Youth)

It's not just that this is the first time we could see Jin actively kiss Haruki back, and with the blinding light of love illuminating them no less. It's also that Jin finally allowed himself to voice his genuine desires and be selfish and allowed himself to give in to the moment.

♡ Moo x Kang Boyfriend Proposal Kiss (Only Boo!)

MY ADORABLE BOYS ARE FINALLY BOYFRIENDS FOR GOOD!They're living their dreams, they're in love, and they're letting the whole world know it, together.

♡ Anin x Pin "It's Still Noon" Kiss (The Loyal Pin)

After so many years of yearning, there was not a force on this earth that could've stopped Anin from making time with her girl at every opportunity. Who cares if it's noon, they're in their house and food shouldn't be the only thing that gets eaten in that dining room.

♡ Kyousuke x Isumi Confession Cheek Kiss (Sugar Dog Life)

Listen. Sometimes, when you are in love with someone who is very sweet and oblivious, a simple confession isn't enough. You need to hit them over the head with your feelings, or kiss them as the case may be, to help them along and realize their own.

♡ Yak x Dee Over the Shoulder Kiss (Wandee Goodday)

It's just such a pretty kiss. They both are, but that cheek kiss hits especially good with that blissed out look on Dee's face. My love of blinding light of love kisses might have some serious competition from pink light kisses.

♡ Jane x Ryan Tippy Toes Kiss (The Trainee)

Their first kiss, which took place just moments before, was perfectly lovely. I enjoyed it a lot. BUT THIS SECOND KISS? THIS LITTLE PECK WHICH RYAN ASKED FOR BY SIMPLY STANDING UP ON HIS TIPPY TOES? SUBLIME. PEAK ROMANCE.

♡ Meiji x Freya Lipstick Kiss (Deep Night: The Two of Us)

The correct way to apply lipstick. The only way to apply lipstick actually.

♡ Do Hoe x Ju Yeong Snack Time Cheek Kisses (Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo)

This? This was what we deserved. We deserved the achingly sweet domesticity of Ju Yeong bringing Do Hoe snacks while he studied and kissing his cheek every time. We deserved to see them in matching fuzzy teddy bear couple pajamas.

IT'S WHAT WE DESERVED!

♡ Phee x Non Pink Kiss (Dead Friend Forever)

I was thrilled for this kiss by mere virtue of finally getting to see Ta and Barcode kiss, but the expression on Non's face? The pink lighting? Phenomenal.

We really could've had it all. Rolling in the deep. 🥲

♡ Takashi x Hiro Claiming Kiss (Love is Better the Second Time Around)

A hickey may be the result, but every hickey begins life as a kiss. And this kiss was a symbol of Hiro's desire to feel like Takashi was really his, to not feel like an outsider in Takashi's life, and to be someone Takashi could share everything with.

♡ Huaien x Xiaobao Blinding Light of Love Kiss (Meet You at the Blossom)

Sometimes a good kiss is more than just a good kiss, which this was. Sometimes it's about what the kiss means to the people watching it. Sometimes it's about the fact that it exists and that people get to watch it at all.

♡ San x Vee Forehead Kiss (Century of Love)

This kiss was such a gentle, loving reassurance that Vee would take the lead and take care of San during their first time being intimate together.

♡ Myung Ha x Yeo Woon First Kiss (Love for Love's Sake)

So incredibly visually pleasing and also: "You're my first everything". My heart. My entire heart and soul. Has anything ever been as earnest as those words and this kiss?

♡ Ming x Joe Face Sniff Kisses (My Stand-In)

This is exactly the sort of tenderness Joe always deserved from the man he loved. Even though it took a thousand agonizing years for Ming to get his shit together and give it to him, better late than never. Plus, I always love when we get sniff kisses.

♡ Sun x Junior First Kiss (Caged Again)

What an absolutely perfect, absolutely lovely first kiss between two absolutely darling boys who are figuring out what it means to be in love with each other. I adored it.

♡ Yuan x Qian Dinner Date Kiss (Unknown)

It's the wine splashing that really makes this for me. Yuan waited years for this date and for the opportunity to yank the man he loved across a dinner table to kiss him. And I just love how he looks down at Qian's hand before he does it.

♡ Do Hoe x Ju Yeong Christmas Present Kiss (Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo)

It's Christmas and Do Hoe is smiling and kissing his boyfriend and everything is peaceful and romantic and horny and good.

♡ Jack x Joke We're About to Fucking Die Kiss (Jack & Joker)

There's a bomb around Joke's neck and bitch ass Alice is out here being Jigsaw, but damn if that's gonna keep Jack from staying by his boyfriend's side. If they're going down, they're going down together, making out in front of god and everyone.

♡ Anin x Pin Party Kiss (The Loyal Pin)

This kiss from the trailer was the one I was most excited to see and it didn't disappoint. It's pretty! It's horny! Anin is wine tipsy! Pin is jealous because other women were hitting on her girl all night! Perfection.

♡ Shan x Ob-aun Blindfold Kiss (Battle of the Writers)

Tutor and Yim kiss so pretty and this show spent its entire runtime reminding us of that fact. I could've chosen any of their kisses, which is true of many pairings on this list, but this one is particularly pretty. And you can see Yim's shoulder moles, which is a fun little treat just for me.

[notafunkiller]

we found wonderland

Summary: You have a choice to make: you either set yourself free or continue to play the game.

Pairing: (fake) boyfriend’s brother!Bucky Barnes x female reader

Warnings: 18+, age gap (r is 26, Bucky is 39), teasing, dirty talk, unprotected séx (but she is on the pill), pet names, daddy kínk, language, implied aftercare, no mention of y/n

Word Count: 2.4K

story masterlist

Bucky Barnes masterlist

A/N: I hope you enjoyed this mini-series! Thank you for reading!

Please, do not repost or translate without my permission!

You had decided you should wait for a week before making your relationship public, using that time to try to convince your parents to change their mind while Bucky plays pretend with his. It’s not an ideal situation, but he understands, keeping the truth to himself.

What he can’t keep to himself is his hands. Not that you can… but as soon as he comes home, he’s all over you, not even caring you are in the living room sometimes.

Acting like you’re just friendly is very hard for you. You want to touch and kiss him like crazy. Having sex with him changed the game, and now you try your hardest to find a way out of this deal so you can be in this relationship completely.

You laugh at the way he pouts. “You’re really adorable for an old man.”

“Is it so crazy I want us together?”

You melt, leaning in to kiss his chin. “That’s not crazy, baby, but isn’t that a little fast?”

“We’ve been living together for months now. What’s the difference?”

You wish you could find the right words to explain it. It’s quite scary and exciting, but it feels strange. “We’ve been together for a couple of days. Maybe we don’t…”

“Are you thinking of a break up already?”

You jump immediately. “No! Maybe we don’t have things figured out enough yet. And by we I mean me. I won’t have a job anymore if my parents don’t change their minds. I won’t have a real home. I won’t have anything but you. And I love every moment I spend with you, but I want something of my own, and I definitely don’t want to feel like a burden even if you don’t make me feel like that. My life is a mess.”

“And I want to help. I am not trying to control you or suggest something you don’t want, but we are friends, too, not just a couple. I am here for you. You can stay with me as a friend if not as a boyfriend. I want you safe.”

You say nothing, only staring at him for a while. You don’t even know what to say because the mix of emotions you feel is confusing.

“You know what I want?”

“What?”

“I want to fuck you right now.” You don’t try to hide your neediness as you place your hands on his shorts. “Can I, baby? Can I ride you?”

“Fuck, you’re gonna kill me before I turn forty. Is this your plan? Do you want me gone?” He’s already raising his ass so he can help you take off his shorts quicker.

“I want you with me always. Want you inside me so badly.”

He groans at your tone. “Then go for it, baby, take whatever you want. It’s all yours. I’m all yours.”

You smile eagerly seeing his hard cock, and lift his T-shirt. You cannot stand anything between your bodies right now. You just need to feel him. “God, we should go to the bedroom, but I can’t wait.”

You take off your underwear, unable to wait any longer. As if someone is holding a knife to your throat, and if you don’t get Bucky inside you in the next seconds, you’re gonna die.

“Anyone can walk in,” he says as if it’s the most normal thing in the world. He probably even enjoys it. “Can you imagine their faces?”

You snort, bringing his dick to your entrance without hesitation after spreading your legs further apart. “No, but I can imagine yours when you come.”

“You don’t need to imagine. You’re gonna see it up close if you hurry up.”

Neither of you even realize you’re not using a condom for the first time until it’s too late and you’re already sliding down.

Your grasp on his shoulders is so forceful, you’re sure it will leave a mark, as you moan his name.

“James…” You desperately look at him, wanting to see if he feels the same. “We’re not using anything.”

“I c-can feel that.”

“God damn it, James,” you sound like you’re scolding him, but in reality you are just overwhelmed.

“What did I… fucking hell, I am totally not getting to turn forty. I will die tonight.”

You ask with your eyes closed. “Do you want me to get a condom?”

“No, I want to die.” He groans, already in a different space. “Unless you want to… I am clean and you are, of course, and I can pull out, but like it’s not… I can go grab a condom right now.”

You immediately shake your head, placing your hand on his chest. He’s not gonna do that. He has to make you come.

“You are not going anywhere, you get out of me and I’ll die!”

“So you’re ovulating?” He asks casually, with a playful grin spread across his face.

You chuckle, hitting him in the shoulder. 

“Yes, I am, and you gotta take care of me.”

Bucky groans, grabbing your ass, unable to keep his hands off you. You’re so hot and warm. “You’re really, really wet, princess.”

“Ihm.” You slide down further, almost taking all of his cock. “Look how deep I took you now.” You moan proudly, feeeling so stretched like this. “Look at this, daddy.”

And when he lets his eyes drop to your entrance, he has no idea how he doesn’t com right then. The sight is incredible.

“Baby…”

“I’m your baby, daddy.” You quickly take off your T-shirt at the same time you move your hips. As soon as he’s naked, you grab your breasts, holding them together with a smirk. You know that is going to affect him, and it makes you feel powerful.

“Oh God,” he groans as you bring your breasts closer to his mouth.

“Come on, daddy, go ahead.”

It’s all he needs to hear before he takes your right nipple into his mouth and the left one between his fingers. Riding him like this is a little difficult, but it’s not impossible. You love getting your breasts played with, and he loves doing it.

There is also something really hot and thrilling about the possibility of getting caught. You have no idea why and how, but you’re going to enjoy this as much as you can.

“You feel so good like this, nothing between us. Nothing between your come and me,” you moan, not even thinking about what you say.

“You can’t say that and expect me to be strong.”

That makes you laugh. “I’m on the pill, though, you don’t have to be strong.”

“Fucking hell, you’re gonna drive me crazy.” He starts to thrust his hips back so he can meet you halfway. Riding him feels so, so good. You got him deeper, and the lack of a condom makes you properly feel his thickness.

“You feel so… Fuck, your cock is filling me just the way I need it.” You grab his shoulders so you can move faster. “You’re such a good daddy, let-letting me use you right here, where everyone could see us.”

“You love using daddy’s cock.” He looks so drunk, in so much pleasure. “Such a naughty girl.”

“I’m your naughty girl, James.”

“All mine.” His hands on your hips help you move faster indeed, and you’re already so close you can barely keep your eyes open.

“F-faster.”

Bucky stops thrusting his hips back, and you groan. You need more.

“If you want it faster, keep your eyes on me, pretty girl.”

“I c-can’t-” As much as you want to fight this, your eyes instinctively close again. “Ss-so close.”

He can hear your desperation and without hesitating, he brings his hand into your hair and pulls unexpectedly hard. That’s enough for you to come loud. So loud you can hear yourself as you let the pleasure consume every bit of you.

But Bucky doesn’t stop moving his hips, making your orgasm last longer. He’s saying things, probably dirty things, in your ear, but you can’t understand anything. Your ears are still ringing.

And just like that, Bucky comes too, with his right hand still wrapped around your hair while the left one is digging into the skin of your hip.

“Fuck, I’m coming inside you, baby, can you feel it? Can you feel me filling your pussy, baby?”

“Ihm,” you can barely whisper, too overwhelmed by everything.

“Whose come?”

“Y-yours.”

“Good girl.” He groans as soon as he finishes coming, wrapping his arms around your waist and hugging you. “This feels like heaven.”

��I don’t think I can go back to wearing a condom now. I mean if you want to…”

“Are you sure? We can still use one just to make sure we are safer.”

You peck him. “We can still use it, don’t worry, I get it. Looking out for me and stuff.”

He lets out a deep breath, thankful you understand what he means.

“Of course I am looking out for you, that’s my job.”

“Job? You are my daddy, not my mom or dad.”

“I am your partner and your friend. I will always look out for you.”

A sudden urge to fuck him again takes over your body, but before you can do it, your phone starts ringing.

Bucky gives you the phone without moving, and when you both see it’s his brother, you groan.

“Hi, William.” You try to sound as normal as possible, but your voice is so raspy it’s impossible.

“Hey, gonna be home in a few minutes. Are you okay? Is Bucky home yet?”

“Ihm, he came.” You wink at James. “All good here. See you.”

You don’t wait for him to answer before you’re hanging up.

“You came too.”

You giggle immediately. It’s hard not to be around Bucky; he is goofy at the right time. “We need to clean up, though, he’s close.”

“Alright.”

*

Your parents didn’t want to listen to you at all. You didn’t have the chance to talk at the party since they’re avoiding you at all costs, and you had to go outside not to cry in front of everyone. You don’t just feel alone and treated like shit, you feel humiliated.

You’re lucky Bucky went to pick up William because his car broke down halfway here, so he didn’t actually witness your breakdown. You know he’d have done something about it. Something you should.

At this point, what do you really have?

“Hey, are you well? Why are you outside, it’s freezing?”

Bucky’s voice makes you jump as he’s suddenly by your side, rubbing your arms. William is right behind him.

“Baby, why are you outside?”

You see Bucky rolling his eyes, and you sigh.

“I wanted some fresh air, William.” You turn toward Bucky before taking a step back. You don’t want him to think you reject his touch. You really need his hug, but it’s not about what you need. “We should go inside.”

He nods, and all three of you make your way close to the improvised stage in the main room.

It’s crazy how many people actually came; it almost feels suffocating.

Your parents have been talking for a while, you assume, because people were animated. You wonder what they promised them.

“And since we’re all here now, I have something to announce,” Bucky’s dad takes the microphone all of a sudden, and William sighs. You want to ask him what is going on since he looks nervous, but you don’t have time to. “I want to invite my son, William, on the stage with us.”

And then he calls your name.

You look at both of your parents, trying to understand why you’d be needed there, and Bucky is just as confused as you are. Everyone starts clapping, and you find yourself dragged on the stage before you can protest.

“Tonight marks a very special moment for us both: professionally and personally.” You freeze, looking at Bucky instantly, but he’s also shocked, shaking his head. “A partnership that will last for a long time, hopefully, passed to a real-life partnership that has developed over the last months.”

William smiles proudly when his dad pats him on the back, and you want to throw up right then.

You turn your head to your parents, who display the fakest smiles you’ve ever seen. They don’t care about what you want. About what you need. Either way, you’re alone, and you cannot continue to play their game. You can’t!

And before anyone can stop you, you’re basically running down the stairs, straight toward Bucky. You quickly wrap your hand around his neck and force him to lean in so you can properly kiss him. You sense his surprise, but you don’t stop, using the opportunity to shamelessly kiss him in front of the whole company, including your parents. He’s yours, and everyone should know it.

He cups your face when you break off the kiss to breathe, and you smile.

You finally did it! You’re free.

You don’t need to turn around to know how upset your families must be. Everyone around you is either gasping or whispering around. You know they’ll be talking about this for a solid week at least, but you’re not gonna be there to hear. You won’t explain anything to them, and they can consider you a cheater who fucked the other brother all they want. It is not your mess to fix. You just want to leave.

“Let’s get out of here,” you whisper, taking his hand. All you want is to eat something and suck him off. “I need to pack my stuff.”

“Are you sure?” He asks concerned as you start to walk toward the exit. Neither of you turns when William calls your names.

“I have never been more sure in my entire life.”

He says nothing as you reach his car, lifting the hand he’s been holding closer to his lips so he can brush a tender kiss against the back of it.

You’re going to be okay.

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