#god i'm so funny 😇

[piscoyt]

[maxlarens]

Hi ! As a pescatarian girly and as someone who has recently started to like Lando, I kept thinking about him with pescatarian!reader, because you know opposites attracts and also it made me think of the olive theory from 'How I met your mother', can be fic or smau

(also I'm the anon who requested the Charles fic and I was wondering if you gave names or emojis to your anons 🤔)

ahhh hi😇😇 thank u sm for sending another ask in. verrryy into this! ive never watched himym but i HAVE heard of the olive theory and genuinely think it can be so true. i also think like sharing food/giving certain parts of ur meal to ur partner is so sweet so i loved this a lot🥺🥺

also, tbh i have never had a consistent enough anon to name them/give them an emoji so i would loveee LOVE to do that🙏🏻 pls let me know what i should call u❤️ (and if anyone wants to be a regular/semi-regular anon and give themselves an emoji/name pls do!!!) ANYWAY alright i hope u enjoy— it’s a just a short ficlet 😌💖

LN: quid pro quo

pairing(s): lando norris x reader [read on ao3]

word count: 1.2k

“Eugh,” Lando says, feigning a gag as he looks at the plate of food set in front of you, “That’s disgusting. I don’t understand how you can put that in your mouth.”

Slowly, you raise an eyebrow at him, looking between your plate and Lando’s screwed-up expression; you point at your food, “Salmon? You think salmon is disgusting? Are you joking right now?”

He shakes his head fervently, a grimace still stuck on his face, “It’s gross.”

A laugh, loud and guffawing erupts from your mouth as you realise he’s being entirely serious. He’s fixated on your meal, frowning as if the fish has severely insulted him in some way. Quickly, you clap your hand over your mouth, concerned you’ll offend him if you keep laughing like that. This is one of a handful of dates you’ve been on together— clearly the first you’ve ordered seafood on— and you’re still trying to make a good impression on Lando.

“Wait,” you collect yourself, breathing deeply so you don’t fall into a fit of giggles again, “You’re not allergic are you?”

“No,” he shrugs, “I just hate fish. You’ve never heard that?”

You snort a little indelicately, already going back to eating your salmon, “‘You’ve never heard that?’,” you tease, “Do you think I stalk you on the internet, Norris?”

He grins that small sheepish grin you like so much as a light blush blooms on his cheeks. You’re very fond of him really. He’s cute in a scrappy kind of way; he’s funny and charming, a little bit dumb sometimes; and he’s into you, which is always a bonus. You’re not together— not quite— just seeing each other when you both have time, but it’s been going very nicely if you do say so yourself.

You like him.

He likes you.

Lando rolls his eyes, and purses his lips in an attempt not to let you see the smile that he’s trying to hide, “Don’t you? Stalk me on the internet?”

“Never,” you answer resolutely, thinking blatantly of that night after you’d first met him when you fell down a rabbit hole, spending a good hour watching thirst traps of him on Instagram before coming to your senses, “Not once.”

He hums, unconvinced, “Alright.”

Alright. You make a face, almost stick your tongue out at him but think better of it at the last second. He laughs— giggles— at you. You look away from him, down at your plate, trying to hide the smile that spreads and spreads behind your hair. God, you like him. You’re trying not to let it get away from you. You get the impression that he’s not huge on relationships, and you’re trying hard to be casual about him. It’s difficult— mostly because everything feels so easy when you’re together.

“So,” you start as you push a forkful of salmon and leafy greens around your plate, “Hate to break it to you, but I’m a pescetarian.”

“Um,” Lando asks around a mouthful of half-chewed food, “What’s that mean?”

You stifle a laugh, “Like a vegetarian, but I eat seafood.”

He swallows and makes another face, similar to the earlier one. You can see this is hard for him to process, he clearly dislikes seafood to a degree that you hadn’t quite understood until now. It’s funny. It’s another thing to add to the growing list of reasons you fancy Lando Norris. Though you would think that as a pescetarian you’d want him to like fish, but you suppose by not eating them he’s just saving all the sea animals that you’re not— quid pro quo.

“What about, like,” he waves his fork around, evidently still wondering why you’d eat seafood voluntarily, “just being a vegetarian?”

You shrug, “Vegetables are boring.”

“Right. Better than eating fish though.”

“I like fish.”

He shakes his head, “I don’t get it… It’s— they’re slimy and they smell and they’ve got fucking beady little eyes. It’s not natural.”

“Okay,” you laugh brightly at his despondent expression, “I do need to eat them, unfortunately. Otherwise, I’d probably die of malnutrition, or I dunno, scurvy.”

He groans, hanging his head so that all you can see of his face is that mop of brown curls. You think of your second date when you’d kissed him for the first time in your stairwell and how you’d threaded a hand into it— and they were soft and not heavy with product the way that you hate. The way he’d smelt like expensive cologne and tasted both smokey and sugary at the same time, just like the whiskey and cokes he’d been having at the bar. There’s a soft smile playing at your lips when he finally looks up.

“Does it bother you?” you ask, “That I eat fish.”

He shrugs, shakes his head in a non-committal way that could be either answer and does that little grin again. The one that means he’s going to say something that you’ll find either unbearably cute or embarrassingly funny.

“Yes,” he says, grin not subsiding, “How am I supposed to kiss you when you’ve got fish breath.”

Your eyebrows shoot up and a shocked laugh bubbles from your mouth, you try to ignore the stirring feeling in your gut at the words how am I supposed to kiss you in favour of responding to his lack of tact Try, being the keyword there. It somersaults in your head, how am I supposed to kiss you he said, like he was thinking of doing it again. Which, okay, of course, he’s thinking of doing it again. You understand what this is— but there was an unmistakable fondness there that you just can't shake.

Anyway, you push thoughts of kissing him aside, he’d still accused you of having fish breath, “Wow,” you say dryly, with no malice at all as much as you try to feign it, “You say that to all the girls?”

He blushes, his tan cheeks turning a very pleasant red as he properly realises what he’d said, “Shit. No— oh my god— I’m sorry. I just meant—”

You wave him off, laughing, “I know what you meant. You’re good, Lando.”

“Phew,” he lets out a breath of relief, his nervous laughter punctuating the air between you, without meaning to he says, “God, I thought I’d just fucked it.”

You furrow your brows and frown, confused, “No. You couldn’t.”

You watch him scrub a hand over his face, embarrassed, before it falls away and he gives you a sheepish little grin that says he’s happy to hear that. Toothy, eyes squinted and carving dimples into his cheeks. Your face feels warm and you smile back, biting your bottom lip on the smile so it doesn’t grow and grow to cover your whole face.

Later, after you’ve finished lunch and spent too much time talking over a too-sticky table in your favourite pub, Lando kisses you up against a tree in the park by your apartment. You put your hand in his soft curls and you smell cologne and taste what he’s been drinking as he presses his tongue into yours. The coarse hair of his moustache brushes against your lips and you kiss back with equal gusto. You pull away when it feels like you two are veering into too inappropriate territory for this public park. He chases you, but you laugh softly, pressing a perfunctory closed-mouth kiss to the corner of his mouth. He groans, laughs, and puts his forehead against yours.

You hum, “I guess my fish breath doesn’t bother you so much, huh.”

“Fuck,” he breathes, “You’re never going to let that go are you.”

You shake your head ever so slightly, “Not as long as I live, Norris.”

[landograndprix]

╰┈➤ ❝ desire • l.n c.l ❞ x

part nine - part eleven

➪ Charles hasn't paid much attention to you after your daughter was born but a certain Brit does.

➪ and while there's a lot of things you still need to work on, this is a great start to the new, beter chapters of your life

➪ established relationship mom!reader x dad!Charles x lando

➪ I think we needed a lil' cute to calm our tits 🥰 also, absolutely gobsmacked by the love this fic is getting and how involved you all are with it, you guys are seriously the best and I love y'all so much 😘

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y/nusername posted to their story

milliexoxo replied to your story

milliexoxo

someone's getting laid tonight

guessing you're not coming home tonight 🤪

y/nusername

go back to your coloring book

milliexoxo

wow, okay..I see how it is

no but seriously, are you coming back tonight or are you staying with lando so I can double lock the house lmao

y/nusername

staying in monaco, will be back tomorrow

milliexoxo

nice, I'll see you tomorrow then

have fun and don't do things I wouldn't do 😘

y/nusername

okay mom 😘

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y/nusername

📍 London, United Kingdom

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 539,678 others

y/nusername fifty shades of earl grey. 🇬🇧

tagged: landonorris, milliexoxo

view all 2,001 comments

norry4 cute, lando took them to England 😭

milliexoxo talk british to me

milliexoxo not pictured, y/n losing her mind over a bookshop

↳ y/nusername that wasn't a shop, that was heaven.

milliexoxo okay..nerd

landoscar i agree with y/n, every book shop is heaven

yukisan girl stop bullying your mom, we've warned you before 😭

milliexoxo I'm a rebel, I don't listen to no one

y/nusername big imagination for such a little girl

norrizz god I just know zoë is getting spoiled by stepdad lando 😭

carlandooo Charles crying in a corner rn

↳ charliecharlie I mean that's his own fault lmfao

carlandooo true 💀

bradleyfewtrell please tell me you met max 😂

↳ landomax I just know millie will bully max relentlessly 😂

bradleyfewtrell and I just know y/n would get along with max and pietra so well!

norrizzlandoo lando and zoë 😭😭

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milliexoxo

like by y/nusername, logansargeant and 2,671 others

milliexoxo your typical tourist on tour.

tagged: landonorris, y/nusername, maxfewtrell

maxwellmax lmfao yes max 💀

landonorris ❤️ I nodnol?

↳ milliexoxo oh my god you're so funny lando!!!!!!!

norry4 took me a second 😂

landonorizzzz he's taking his annoying stepdad duties seriously 😭

landoscar I feel sorry for the people who don't follow millie and miss out on all this

charlieslec did she just casually expose lando and y/n??

↳ norry4 are you new here? 😂

maxfewtrell but why?

↳ milliexoxo because I can 🥰

yukisan are we all just going to ignore the fact that Logan Sargeant is hiding in the likes? Yes? Cool 😭

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y/nusername

📍 Miami, FL

liked by riabish, landonorris and 609,578 others

y/nusername week 6. 🇺🇸

tagged: landonorris

view all 1,922 comments

landonorizzzz aw lando finally made it to the feed normally instead of the soft launch bullshit 😇

charlesgirlies zoë 🥺😭

milliexoxo look at my girlfriend living her best life, floating around ❤️

norry4 are we official? Hellooo can I finally fully unleash thr landoy/n shipper in me?! 🥺

yourmumsuser my little zoë 🤩🤩

chilisainz zoe being the unbothered queen that she is

landonorris my girls ❤️

↳ landoscar SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UUUUUUUP 😭

yesrislando brb going to take a bath with my toaster

maxmaxmax man's really pulled a max and stole another driver's girl and child 💀

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Desire taglist; @fangirl-dot-com @sainzluvrr @writingworlds @chezmardybum @lewisvinga @xjval @fanficweasley @rockyhayzkid @aundercover @thecubanator2 @minchedchilli @crimeshowjunkie @alisoncasey21 @eeviepepi08 @shamelesspotatos @sleepybrokenmelle @leireggsworld @janeholt3 @iamahalicinationn @dessxoxsworld @kapsylia @22yuki @dark-night-sky-99 @sheslikeacurse @nerdreader

Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @elliegrey2803 @ravisinghs-wife @harrysdimple05 @minkyungseokie @pretty-little-bunny382728 @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @severewobblerlightdragon @cherry-piee @namgification @mycenterfold @devineendevers

Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10 @bored-brunette2 @i83andrew

[cvntluver444]

7 mins in heaven w ellie😇😇😇😇

thank you so much for your request and your support love!! <3

✞ 7 minutes ✞

✿ summary : the request!

✿ warnings : smut minors/men (boys) dni, puss rubbing, dirtyy talk, shy reader, sweet ellie, ellie teaching reader, reader is in closest!!!!!!, mentions of reader in str@ight relationship, almost getting caught!, if i missed any lmk pls!

✿ a/n : thank you for supporting my works as always! this is not my best work bc i used all my creative brain juice on my last fic so i am so sorry! unfortunately, i am headed back to school this weekend so my writing is going to slow down, but i'm not stopping don't worry babies. im hoping to put out 2-3 fics a week still!!!! keep sending in those requests! I have one more to work on, so to the anon who requested it its coming i promise my love!!!!

ALSO i did kind of make this a personal fic im so sorry LMAO basically i just explain how when i finally realized i was gay YAYAYA !!!!!!! but yeah warning again the reader in this is based on me so it is like finding out you're into girls later on kind of thing so if this is something you're not interested in feel free to skip! I hope you like it lucy!!! (idk if that's your real name im just going to call u that teehee) i love you all so much! muah

✿ as always, please remember to keep spreading information on and support Palestine!!

daily click

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

you anxiously played with your fingers as the last of the party guest gathered around the huge circle. your friends and you decided to spend your saturday night at one of your classmates party, resulting in you now dreading your turn in the 'truth or dare' game.

"you okay?" you turn your head to your left as your eyes land on your friend, who clearly could pick up on how nervous you looked.

"yeah i'm fine," you tell her. "just hope i don't have to do anything stupid or embarrassing. she laughs at your comment.

"don't worry, i doubt you'll even get picked. there's a lot of people here and were all drunk so, who cares!'. her shouts fills the room, drawing a couple eyes toward the two of you. you giggle and hide your face, trying to tell her to keep it down. in the midst of shushing her, your eyes graze the room, watching people roll their eyes at her behavior. but your eyes catch someone else's and you freeze.

ellie williams

she sends you a soft smile, a dark look in her eyes. you gulp and look away quickly. god, she was so hot you thought. you hope she couldn't how flustered she made you. you hope no one could. your whole life, you've always had no problems catching boys' attention. you could have a whoever, whenever, but with this luxury came its flaw. you never actually liked the boys you went out with, you just loved being loved, being in a relationship. you never understood why you felt that way, but just continued on normally, not giving yourself a chance to actually explore more about yourself. but when you first met ellie freshmen year, the feelings finally became visible, especially after finding out she was also into girls; however, you were still not sure if she felt the same. This caused you to once again burry your feelings and close yourself up. You were too scared, and way too sober to even try to talk to ellie.

suddenly, a loud voice can be heard yelling throughout the house. "truth or dare starting now in living room," on boy shouted. your palms became sweaty and you prayed that everyone would pick up on your uncomfortableness and just leave you alone. as always though, the world likes to work in funny ways, and you feel a large presence sit next to you and tap you on the shoulder.

"hey," the boy smiles, "cool if i sit here?" you just give me a simple nod of your head and continue your attention elsewhere, your thoughts interrupted once again. "you look good tonight, by the way". you turn back around, and give him a quiet thanks, and before he could respond, everyone around you begins to pick who will go first for the game.

after three or four people went, you began to grow annoyed. the man next to you could not take the hint, and you were the only person here not having a good time.

"alright williams," the room cheers silently, "truth or dare". your attention is now fully on ellie. she stares up at her friend who just picked on her, small smirk on her face as she answers with a confident dare. "hmmm," her friend hums out loud, looking around the room. you swear you see their eyes stop on yours for a second, before they get an idea. "i dare you to do 7 minutes in heaven," they pause and the room is filled with oooo's. your heart drops a bit. "a person of your choosing." now everyone was going crazy. everyone knew ellie was gay, and everyone knew she made every girl gay, so it was a pretty heavy dare.

ellie smiles up at her friend, sage you think their name is, before she slowly starts scanning the room. you quickly look down, hoping that your avoided eye contact would make you more invisible. your only focus now was watching your fidgeting fingers and giving back half asses answers to the man beside you who still will not shut up.

you hear ellie suck in her breathe before she slowly gets up from the ground. all you wanted to do in this moment was sink into the ground, not sure how you were going to handle seeing ellie pick another girl that isn't you and go fuck her in the closet. too deep in your thoughts, you don't hear the air leave your friends lungs as a certain someone stalks towards you. you only know ellie is right in front of you once you see the beat up sneakers sneak right under your vision.

your eyes widen and you cant breathe. there has to be someone behind you right? no, she could not pick you. in fear that you would be disappointed when looking up, you keep your head down, telling yourself that you're just-

your friend next to you quietly says your name, excitement laced in her voice. she was the only one you told, the only one you could trust with something so personal to you, so to say she was absolutely ecstatic to see ellie pick her best friend, well that was an understatement.

after your quick reality check, your line of vision trails from the top of her feet, all the way to her line of vision, where you see hear towering over you, smirk on her face. you felt like you were going to throw up.

"wanna come with me?" she asks you, that little smile never leaving her face. you look around the room, everyone in just as much shock as you. you look back at ellie, and without thinking twice, you nod your head yes.

she grabs her hand out for you to take, and you two make your way into the closet in between the living room and kitchen, but not before ellie yells something along the lines of keep yourselves busy, and don't be pervs. you feel like you're dreaming, you can't believe ellie williams picked you. but suddenly, you're brought back into reality when she closes the closet and turns on her phone flashlight.

"so," she begins, "how's your night been." you now grow extremely insecure at how little you've been talking to her, not knowing exactly what to do next considering you've never been with a girl.

"oh uh," you begin, "it's been okay. what about yours?" stupid stupid stupid.

"pretty good. saw that guy talking to you. you looked uncomfortable so thought i would save you." she gives a light giggle, but your heart drops and you look at her with sad eyes.

"oh uh yeah haha thanks," you attempt to say, sadness clearly laced in your voice. ellie picks up on it.

"are you okay? did he do anything?" she asks you, coming closer, concern reading all over her face. you blush at how much she cares about you.

"no, no, he didn't do anything, just was annoying," you let out a breathy laugh. "i guess i just thought that we were gonna, ya know, since you picked me, um, never mind this is stupid." your cheeks are now red with embarrassment, and ellies face softens at your rambling.

"aw, no sweetie. just because i picked you doesn't mean we have to do anything. i know you're not into girls." she gives you a friendly tap on the shoulder. ouch. your heart has now sank completely, and you slowly go to reach for the closet door handle. ellie looks confused, before she panics and grabs your hand.

"where are you going? it hasnt been 7 minutes yet sweetheart," she asks you.

"i was just gonna go back. kinda boring just doing nothing here." you tell her sadly.

"well, what do you want to do?" she still hasn't caught on? at this point, you feel like you will never get another chance again. with your ego still a little boosted that she chose you, you answer her.

"i wanna kiss you, ellie," you tell her. she freezes in the spot she's in before she slowly relaxes and relief washes over her face.

"i wanna kiss you too." she tells you. you look up at her, hope in your eyes, and she slowly grabs yours chin with her fingers and pulls you towards her. your lips meet and you both slowly start to make out. now you know why it was called 7 minutes in heaven. pleasure rushed through your body, and you instantly melted into the kiss. it was the first time you actually felt something when kissing someone, and in the bliss of this new feeling, you now put your arms around her shoulders.

the kiss deepens and turns more sinful as ellies hands now trail down to your ass and give it a light squeeze. you moan into her mouth and she groans back in response. her hands now start exploring your body, covering every inch of you until they make their way down towards your loose jeans. you quickly pull away, feeling like a complete virgin even though this kind of stuff is nothing new to you.

"woah, hey, you okay? we can stop if you want," ellie tells you, scared that she may have gone too far.

"no ellie its not you, its just," you try to find the right words. "i've never actually been with a girl before." you tell her, shame written all over your features. she lightly grabs your face once more as she gives you another passionate kiss.

"im happy to help you through it, and if you ever want me to stop, you just tell me." she explains, leaving light kisses all over you exposed next and chest. you moan out as you give her your permission to continue. her lips find her way back to yours, taking control of the kiss. in between each breath, she made sure to tell you how beautiful you were, and how much she had been dreaming of this. you return the compliments, gasping when ellie now picks you up and leans you down on the closet floor.

now on top, she puts all her weight on her elbow, as the other one trails down from your chest, then your stomach, to finally the place where you needed her the most. still kissing you, her fingers undo your buttons. once your jeans were shoved down, and your panties moved to the side, ellie breaks the kiss.

you whine from the loss of contact, and she shushes you. "is it ok if i touch you?" she asks you politely.

"yes, ellie. please touch me," you beg her. "want you so bad." her lips suddenly reconnect with yours, and her fingers start rubbing light circles on your clit. you moan as she teases you, never feeling this way with any guy you've ever been with.

"you make the prettiest noises," she tells you, nipping at your lips. "fuck, and you're so wet too." her talking alone brings you even closer to your high, another new feeling.

you feel her fingers now trail down and tease your entrance, making the most sinful sound. she bites her lips, then starts pumping two fingers inside of you.

your eyes now roll to the back of your head and ellie falls to your side, the new position allowing her to finger you even faster. your head leans into her shoulder, and tears brim in your eyes from how good shes making you feel.

"faster, please," you beg, now staring into her eyes. the innocent look on your face causes her pussy the clench.

"yeah baby? you want me to go faster?" she teases you. "ill do anything for you beautiful." that was enough to send you over the edge, and you start to shake and she speeds up her motions.

"els" is all you can get out, but she knows exactly what you're trying to say, telling you to let go and cum all over her fingers.

and you're about to, until you hear yelling outside the closest door, and people are banging on your door, telling you seven minutes has passed.

you and ellie groan, and you're about to scream out of frustration, before ellies low voice cuts you off.

"i want you to get dressed and meet me outside my car, we can finish this at me." she tells you, a loving look on her face. you giggle and give her a quick peck, before jumping up and putting on your clothes.

you two come out of the closet, rushing towards the front door, completely ignoring all your friends and strangers random questions flying your way.

"where are they going?"

"are they holding hands?"

"do you think they did anything?"

"they so fucked."

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✿ a/n: heh, they came out the closet. anyways, like i said, very personalized im sorry i hit my penjamin and im in my feels but i really hope you guys liked it! my requests are still open! love you all so much and don't forget to follow because i post frequently!! <3

[il-miele-che-scrive]

Lando Norris and [Y/n] [Y/l/n]'s rivalry takes a different turn in Miami

yourusername THANK YOU TO MY TEAM, ALL THE REDBULL FANS AND MY TEAMMATE MAX (sorry to beat ur ass lol) MY FIRST VICTORY IN FORMULA 1 I LOVE YOU GUYS

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username1 Chill girlie, it's just a sprint race win

username2 And people were shitting on Redbull for dropping Checo for a rookie 😭 you showed them, been on the podium almost every weekend and got the first win so quick

carlossainz55 Congrats 👏 🥇

↳yourusername THANK YOU 💪

↳username3 Carlos and Y/n are literally the only drivers who managed to beat Max this season and may I add she's a rookie

username4 Redbull knew what they were doing

redbullracing Our golden girl🏆

↳yourusername 💙💙

maxverstappen1 It was my pleasure to see you win💪

↳yourusername Get ready to see it more often

username5 I wonder how Lando feels knowing that a girl rookie got a win before him

↳username6 same thing happened last year when Oscar won sprint 😭 guess he won't do anything about it

↳username4 He's crying probably lmao

username7 📞God's calling he says we should have more girls in Formula 1

charles_leclerc A victory in your rookie year is always special🥳🥳

↳yourusername I love it 😭

oscarpiastri Party when?

↳yourusername After I win the race tomorrow 😇 unless you can tell Lando to get his shit together and try to beat me

username5 I love the fact that Y/n and Oscar are friends, Oscar is friends with Lando, and for some reason Y/n and Lando seem to hate each other

username8 I've heard there's some story behind the whole Y/n Lando thing 😭

username6 WHAAAAAT?

username8 So apparently when they were kids, like 15 or smth, one of them had a crush on the other one, but it didn't work out hence enemies now

username6 I'll assume Lando had a crush on Y/n cuz there's no way one could have a crush on a 15yo Lando Norris lmao

username9 And here I was thinking Y/n was just angry about how Lando almost crashed into her a few races ago

username10 sameeee lmao it was so funny to see them argue in the paddock

username9 Yeah and seeing them the weekends after this incident I was like miss girl just likes to hold grudges over things that happen in F1 from time to time lmao

landonorris WWE FUCKIJG DID IT. PT 1🏆

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oscarpiastri Well done man 👏👏👏

alex_albon Congrats!!! 💪👏

georgerussell63 Congrats mate!!!

username1 All I know is he read the comments under Y/n's post 😭

username2 Y/n's victory pissed him too much lmao

yourusername I guess it's not too much for the little Lando Norris anymore

↳landonorris he's not so little anymore

yourusername Shame I wasn't on the podium with you tho

landonorris do better next time then lol

username3 LANDO HAHAHAAH

username4 His villain era starts

yourusername Anyway I'm glad to be your motivation

username5 No cuz I'd also love to see Y/n and Lando on the podium together

↳username6 Y'all talk about the podium together but I'd love to see them in the cool down room together lmao

username5 That'd be gold man, I'd pay millions to be a fly in the room if it ever happened

username7 @/yourusername stop pretending you're not in love with Lando

username7 Actually guys stop pretending you're not in love with each other @/yourusername @/landonorris

↳username8 THIS FEELS SO PERSONAL LMAO

username1 I love a good enemies to lovers story

username2 ARE THEY OKAY?

username3 I saw a video of Max being at the party so I assumed Y/n was there also BUT THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED

username4 Nah cuz why's the kiss so passionate 😭

username5 girl is living the Wattpad life

username6 now she isn't rejecting him 👀

↳username7 you mean HE isn't rejecting HER now

username8 Do you know something we don't? 🤨

username7 actually yes, Max as in Lando's Max (not Y/n's Max) went live on Twitch yesterday and he said something along the lines of young Lando rejecting young Y/n

username8 Nahhhh this is even better now

username9 I just know that other drivers will make fun of them after this

username10 I wonder how will they act now? Will they pretend the video doesn't exist?

↳username11 I feel like nothing will change, same hatred, same rivalry (even more now after both of their wins)

username12 I assume it was just a moment of weakness induced by the emotions

username11 And alcohol

username13 there's no way it didn't end in the hotel bed lol

username14 I'm tired of pretending I wasn't waiting for this to happen

username15 it feels like a fever dream lmao

yourusername We deserved a New York trip after the victories

view all comments

oscarpiastri This doesn't feel real

↳username1 exactly my thoughts 😭

landonorris well deserved, well enjoyed

↳yourusername You're not that terrible to be around, did you know that?

landonorris i'm still adjusting to your presence, can't say the same

yourusername Mean :(

landonorris i love you :)

yourusername Nice :)

username2 HE SAID THE BIG WORDS

username3 Ladies and gentlemen, Lando 'I don't wanna mature' Norris has matured

username4 God my brain can't comprehend what the hell happened

carlossainz55 The IT couple 👏🏆

↳landonorris of course

↳username5 Seems like they've been teaching Carlos the gen z expressions 😭

username6 I will miss the rivalry between them

↳username2 you really think it'll end?

username6 Yeah they'll go soft on each other

username2 Y/n is the second most competitive on the grid after Max, I don't think the rivalry between her and Lando will end 😂

maxfewtrell Finally

↳yourusername My 15yo self would say the same if she ever knew

maxverstappen1 @/landonorris pls don't affect her performance

↳landonorris pls let me be the cause of redbull's downfall, I've been plotting for years

yourusername It's not like I'll go easy on you now that you're my boyfriend

landonorris mean :(

yourusername I love you :)

landonorris nice :)

georgerussell63 Congrats on finally admitting your feelings guys

↳charles_leclerc We all knew it'll happen, we just didn't know when 😂

pierregasly @/charles_leclerc you owe me McDonald's

↳charles_leclerc We'll go after the season ends

landonorris you guys had a bet?

yourusername Of course they did, I'm so not surprised

charles_leclerc Max also participated.

yourusername @/maxverstappen1⁉️

maxverstappen1 I did participate in the bet...

yourusername How could you betray me like this!!

maxverstappen1 I like maccas, it convinced me

maxverstappen1 But we're all very happy for you if that makes it any better

yourusername Let's say it does...

landonorris i say we should beat his ass on the next race

yourusername I agree, it's settled 🏁 Max Emilian Verstappen, get ready to from now on forever be behind a mclaren and your fellow redbull

[jude5bellingham]

throwback thursday ౨ৎ trent alexander-arnold

pairing: trent alexander-arnold x reader

part two here

summary: lfc photographer loves to post tbts about one man in particular

warnings & notes : no warnings!! all images belong to their rightful owners and i hope you enjoy my first post ^__^

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, and szoboszlaidominik

liked by trentarnold66, andyrobertson94, and 98,966 others

yourusername what was the saying? man, the first time was so nice... sort of #tbt ?

view all 48,658 comments

user1 HE HAD TO DO IT TWICE

📌 pinned by yourusername

user2 THANK YOU YN FOR TRENT POST

judebellingham 🤫

trentarnold66 🤫

yourusername 🤫

szoboszlaidominik 🤫

user3 /THE/ RIGHT BACK

liked by yourusername

user4 BEST RB ITW

liked by yourusername

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc

liked by liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, and 101,233 others

yourusername can you remember the rainnnnnnnnnn? #tbt

view all 45,878 comments

jordanhenderson ❤️

andyrobertson94 ❤️

trentarnold66 ❤️

liverpoolfc ❤️

user5 don't let the first slide distract you from this being another trent post

user6 i think it's just because she didn't upload these ones when they won!!

user5 or this is a trent post in disguise

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc and mosalah

liked by mosalah, trentarnold66, and 99,264 others

yourusername new year, same 👑

view all 58,885 comments

ibrahimakonate 👑

ryanjiro_ 👑

andyrobertson94 👑

user7 omg yearly non trent non tbt post

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc

liked by liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, and 100,645 others

yourusername i ain't never seen 2 pretty bestfrie- oh wait! i have! #tbt

view all 60,487 comments

andyrobertson94 i'm pretty sure you still haven't seen 2 pretty besties..

yourusername have some confidence robbo

andyrobertson94 i wasn't talking about me...

trentarnold66 ?

user8 robbo is just as funny as ever

user9 🐐 KLOPP PIC

liked by yourusername

user10 wake up babe new yn tbt post just dropped

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc, codymathesgakpo, and trentarnold66

liked by liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, and 88,962 others

yourusername oh cause putting me out of work is just soo funny 🤣😐

view all 36,874 comments

codymathesgakpo it really is 🤣

ibrahimakonate think of it as a well deserved break 🤣

trentarnold66 you look like you needed one

yourusername what are you implying🤨?

trentarnold66 ...

andyrobertson94 someone's in trouble with the missus... 🤣 🤣 🗑️ comment deleted by yourusername

szoboszlaidominik 🤣 🤣 🤣

user11 ROBBO'S COMMENT???

user12 THE MISSUS???? 😭😭

twitter #ynxtrent is trending!

yourusername

tagged liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, virgilvandijk, and jordanhenderson

liked by liverpoolfc, trentarnold66, and 100,344 others

yourusername just incase you forgot about this #tbt

view all 56,254 comments

liverpoolfc ❤️

judebellingham mate just never stops trying to steal your job

yourusername if i didn't know any better i'd think he was trying to get rid of me 😔

virgilvandijk trent should be praticing not hitting the crossbar instead of his photography skills

yourusername agreed

trentarnold66 on it skipper 🫡

user13 average yn tbt (trent front and center)

liked by yourusername

yourusername and trentarnold66

♫ Lana Del Rey, Bleachers ⠂Margaret (feat. Bleachers)

liked by liverpoolfc, andyrobertson94, and 150,066 others

yourusername happy 365 as mr & mrs, and here's to many more 🤍 (also #tbt)

view all 100,255 comments

yourusername thanks andyrobertson94 for letting the cat out of the bag 🙄

📌 pinned by yourusername

andyrobertson94 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

trentarnold66 when you know, you know 🤍

yourusername when you're good, it's gold🤍

user14 this is going to make me sob oh my god

user15 WAKE UPPPP BOMB OF A YN TBT POST JUST DROPPED

user16 this is literally insane how did they hide being married for a year

user17 HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN TOGETHER FOR

judebellingham i'm so glad it wasn't me who spilled

yourusername i'm shocked that it wasn't

judebellingham hey??

yourusername 😇😇😇

liverpoolfc 🤍🤍🤍

liverpoolfc dibs on your kids btw

user18 preordering is crazy

yourusername

tagged trentarnold66

liked by trentarnold66, liverpoolfc, and 120,544 others

yourusername hope this #tbt makes up for keeping secrets from you guys

view all 60,233 comments

curtisjr now that you've been exposed are you just going to shamelessly post trent pics now?

yourusername thought i've been doing that this entire time, lad?

andyrobertson94 there goes any chance of seeing actual liverpool pics

yourusername 😝

szoboszlaidominik i, for one, think this content is just as good

yourusername stop flirting with my man domi...

trentarnold66 you have a nickname for him🤨?

yourusername green is definitely your colour babe

user19 BABE WAKE UP THE BEST YN TBT YET HAS JUST DROPPED

liked by yourusername

[love-belle]

my boyfriend's boyfriend !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which she's the one who's third wheeling her boyfriend and his best friend.

or

for when you're the third wheel in your own relationship. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // lando norris x fem!reader

warnings - language

author's note - i really hope you like it!! thank you so much for reading, i love you!!!

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55, landonorris and 896,427 others

yourusername he's kinda cool ig

tagged landonorris

7,627 comments

username they're so CUTE im SICK to my stomach LIKE

username they're so ❤️❤️❤️

username it should be illegal for two hot bitches to date like what about US

username she's so girlfriend

carmenmmundt missing you x

*liked by yourusername*

username they're like the best like im not even kidding i love them sm they're so :///

username SHE'S SO GF LIKEEE I WANT HER

carlossainz55 leave my man alone please 🙄🤚

-> yourusername my man* u mean

-> carlossainz55 no i don't ❤️

-> username CARLANDO ⁉️⁉️⁉️

username my bi ass is having a crisis omg

username imagine being a relationship 😂😂😂

-> username real like imagine someone loving u as much lando loves y/n 😂😂😂

landonorris U GUESS????

-> yourusername yeah 😇

-> landonorris guess again

-> yourusername fine

-> landonorris go on

-> yourusername ur okayish

-> landonorris blocked and reported

landonorris is the beauty in the second slide single???

-> yourusername no but her bf eats her food and doesn't get nutella from the store so she's about to be!! i'll keep u updated!!

-> landonorris rushing to the store as we speak rn

username god i need me a lando rn

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, georgerussell63 and 789,625 others

landonorris she said i'm more than okay ❤️

tagged yourusername

7,642 comments

username GOODBYE SHE'S SO

username OH MY GOD

username idk if i should cry abt the fact that i'll never be with her or that i'll never be her

username she's so beautiful like omg

danielricciardo are those my sunglasses???

-> landonorris her outfit is everyone's something

-> yourusername lies x

-> lilymhe ok so that isn't my tshirt?

-> yourusername no comment

username CAN LANDO FIGHT?????????

username im ready to throw HANDS for her like lando u better square UP

username im in love woah.

lilymhe she lied

-> landonorris stay bitter

-> yourusername me when lily read in between the lines ❤️❤️❤️

-> landonorris both of u are bullies omg

-> lilymhe ���

username she's so adorable cute beautiful pretty gorgeous ethereal breathtaking hot fine amazing

-> username it's okay lando!!!!!! u can comment on ur post!!!!!!!

carlossainz55 when he used to post me like this 💔💔💔

-> landonorris sorry babe 💔 had to win her over

-> yourusername stay mad ❤️

username this carlos and y/n beef is so fucking funny like

yourusername i say things when im half asleep

-> landonorris you can't take them back

yourusername i guess :///

-> landonorris darling you're breaking my heart

yourusername (i love you)

-> landonorris (i love you so much more)

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, charles_leclerc and 789,524 others

yourusername proof that im the other woman in this relationship

tagged landonorris carlossainz55

7,916 comments

username NAHHHH THEY'RE IN LOVE

username OMG

username LMFAOOOOOOO

username the way carlos is looking at lando PLEASE

danielricciardo about time you found out

-> yourusername a harsh realisation

username this is hilarious

username I CACKLED

username carlando 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

carmenmmundt it's a tough realisation 💔💔💔

-> yourusername my heart's breaking 💔💔💔

username lando and y/n?????? lando and carlos!!!!!!!!!!

username carlos really stole y/n's man huh

username I LAUGHED OUT LOUD OMG

carlossainz55 when she finally realises 😇😇😇

-> yourusername i hate u.

-> carlossainz55 no you don't.

username CARLOS AND Y/N FIGHTING OVER LANDO IS SO FUNNY LIKEEE

landonorris babe i can explain.........

-> yourusername i was the side chick all along huh??????

-> carlossainz55 so glad we're finally acknowledging that!

-> yourusername sainz i want u to step on a lego

landonorris coffee???

-> yourusername i'll be in our bedroom!!! i love u!!!

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, maxverstappen1 and 875,278 others

landonorris my forever 💌

tagged yourusername

8,527 comments

username GOODNIGHT.

username im gonna check if the toaster is waterproof!!!!!! brb!!!!!!!

username oh my god

carmenmmundt the prettiest

*liked by landonorris*

username she's so ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

username no bc im in LOVE with her

lewishamilton 🤍

*liked by landonorris*

username "my forever" so u want me dead.

username need a lando asap thank u

username no bc their relationship is literally goals like childhood best friends to lovers????? they're both obsessed with eachother?????? the way they support eachother?????? EVERYTHING DUDE

carlossainz55 you won that teddy for me.

-> landonorris babe.......

-> yourusername oh so HE'S babe now???

-> carlossainz55 yes and???

-> yourusername idc i want joint custody of that damn teddy

carlossainz55 fyi everyone!!!! i let her borrow MY teddy that lando won for ME!!!!! just thought everyone should know

-> landonorris you're both kids omg

yourusername jokes aside i love you SO much u STUPID like i own my entire heart i adore u

-> landonorris hahahahaha i'm not used to you being this nice please go back to being mean!

-> yourusername take the damn compliment

-> landonorris yes ma'am.

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55, landonorris and 899,627 others

yourusername all jokes aside i love this little dude!!!!! he's exactly what u imagined daylight to be like!!!!!! he's crazy but he takes good photos and makes amazing coffee!!!!!! lando, i love you so much like u own my ENTIRE heart even when u flirt with carlos in front of me!!!!!

tagged landonorris

comments are disabled for this post

[vrmxlho]

-ˏˋ ur socials as sae's gf ˊˎ-

-`♡ ´- liked by karasu, mikage and 876 others

yn: why is this man making me gym im already hot enough 😒😒😣😣

tagged: sae

sae: may i remind you that you came willingly ?

↳ yn: that doesn't make a good caption tho does it?

↳ sae: whatever

↳ sae: but you're right, you are hot enough

↳ yn: oh 😏

itoshi_rin: how you are able to deal with someone so flippant and rude is bewildering

↳ karasu: charity work fr

↳ sae: this is why isagi's better

↳ itoshi_rin: bitch ass

↳ isagi_11: ty bae 🫶 🫶 🫶

↳ sae: never speak to me directly again

-`♡´- liked by itoshi_rin, mikage and 987 others

yn: literal love of my life

location: disneysea, tokyo

sae: why am i competing with a little green man?

↳ itoshi_rin: cuz he has a better personality than you ❤️

↳ sae: do you have a death wish?

↳ isagi_11: rin using emojis is gonna haunt me forever

↳ 666666: fr i crange 😧

sae: i'm never taking you to disneysea again...

↳ yn: yk i love you so so much, right?

↳ yn: but u being jealous is saur funny 🤭

↳ sae: i'm not jealous

↳ yn: you're so cute

↳ sae: shut up

↳ itoshi_rin: oh my god just blind me already

-`♡ ´- liked by eggod, mikage and 1.6k others

yn: 🖤💖

tagged: blackpinkofficial, sae

eggod: man’s is literally sulking at the concert of the century smh

↳ kaisersexc: he’s sad they’re more famous 🤣🤣

↳ 666666: LMFAOOOO

↳ sae: strikers think they're so cool when they can't even score goals without a midfielder

↳ yn: pls stop being a football nerd, love...

↳ eggod: why are y'all still replying i don't wanna see any of this

yn: @sae you're pretty even when you sulk 🫶

↳ sae: i wasn't sulking

↳ itoshi_rin: must've been difficult not getting yn's attention

↳ yn: rin ily but pls stop fighting under my posts this is why they invented dms!!

↳ 666666: you HWAT 😱😱😰

↳ yn: nagi stop instigating 🙁

-`♡ ´- liked by mikage, isagi_11 and 2k others

sae: here i posted you now will you hop off my dick??

tagged: yn

666666: pls keep your bedroom activities to yourself??

↳ sae: stop being a perv nagi

↳ 666666: YOU KNOW MY NAME???

karasu: never thought i’d see a man ask for this

↳ eggod: ong he must be crazy!

↳ karasu: nah ur just a touch-deprived loser

↳ eggod: dawg 💔😞

yn: SAE???? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT CAPTION

↳ sae: did you not want me to post you?

↳ yn: yeah but you could've written something cute or smth 😒

↳ sae: i'm not writing something corny i dont like pda

↳ yn: wtf 💔

↳ sae: i still love you

↳ yn: OKASGJDBFS THIS MAKES UP FOR EVERYTHING

sae: yn told me she likes calvin klein so i became a calvin klein model

tagged: calvinkleinjp

yn: UR SO HOT FOR THIS 😭😭

yn: come home rn

↳ sae: i'm training

yn: i wanna make out w you

↳ sae: nvm i finished early

↳ yn: thought so 😇

yn: in those 😏

↳ itoshi_rin: oh for fucks sake

666666: what the fuck are these prices?

↳ yn: bffr nobody's looking at those prices

↳ 666666: you're the only person alive attracted to that ogre

↳ itoshi_rin: i'm in love with you

↳ 666666: oh damn 😏

[melodic-haze]

... Arlecchino with a reader taller than her? Would that change anything? I'm so curious 😇

☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Arlecchino x dom!Reader

☆ — TYPE: NSFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Reader has a cock/strap referred to as such

☆ — NOTES: Can I say I tried to make this sfw first and then failed when I realised the potential

☆ — PARTS: Part 1 (you are here), Part 2

This is so fucking funny to me bc when you think ab it Arlecchino's acc REALLY fucking short without heels compared to her height ON heels

Don't laugh at her face ab it though unless you want death 🤷‍♀️

I'm like 5'5 I wish I was tall enough for Arle to have to look up at me :/

In all seriousness though I do think that she uses heels both as a weapon with those fuckass blades, but also as a way to seem taller and more intimidating—the cold, unfeeling Father that she wanted to present herself as, completely untouchable

When you're taller than her though?? God, without heels it gets her feeling things she hadn't thought she'd ever feel, let alone being taller than her WHILE she has heels on 🫶

She actually feels powerless, a feeling that is usually most unpleasant, and yet.......she actually finds herself liking the height difference as she looks up at you to actually look you in the eye

It'd wake up the undiscovered size kink she didn't even KNOW she had bc nobody else reaally made her feel sooo I mean yes ❗️ Something very much changes in her ☺️☺️☺️☺️

"Ah.. mn..!"

Long nails, practically talons at this point, threatened to break your skin as you pounded her insides relentlessly. Arlecchino was always such a good girl for you, taking whatever you gave her without a single complaint.

You couldn't help but deem yourself lucky, to witness such a docile, subservient side to her, considering the ever-so-stoic persona she dons. Not as if it stopped with you simply witnessing her majesty, no—you were the entire reason why she was pliant like this, a powerful figure practically turning herself into an obedient ragdoll for you to use for your own satisfaction.

Not as if you were selfish though. No, if anything, from the way she had often looked at you and the fact that she would much rather let her own actions speak in her stead, she enjoyed being used like this.

..Enjoyed it a little too much, actually.

There were times when you've seen her look up at you woth a dazed look in her eyes—the crimson crosses often scanned you up and down before looking away with a tint in her cheeks. Of course, it had confused you to no end; was there something she saw?

You only figured it out when she had decided to idly comment on your height one time when you had helped her with taking a book from the uppermost shelves, her heels gone in favour for comfort within the safety of your own home.

"You.. are rather tall," that's all she said, the same coat of rare pink on her cheeks before staring at you—at your hands—before shaking her head and walking away swiftly.

...

Actually, this might be the best time to test your hypothesis.

You sat up, putting your pace into an abrupt stop, as you placed your hands on the curve of her ass and kept her close.

As knee-deep in pleasure as she was, one could never take away the sudden instinct of alert observation, "Is.. mm.. Is there something wrong, my beloved?"

You shook her head, "No, no, just.. brace yourself."

"Why would-- ..!"

Her breath hitched as you lifted her into the air, her hands crossed onto your shoulders as she held onto you in shock. Not as if you gave her room for a reaction, anyway, since you had easily slammed back into her the next second.

The new upward angle paired with the closeness between the two of you had her practically seeing stars as you hit spots that she hadn't realised existed within her. Every time your cock plunged inside her pussy, the tip hit the deepest spots—ones you had only grazed when you really went rough with the Harbinger.

Not to mention her feet weren't touching the floor.

You had lifted her up, and with the height difference between you two, she was exactly she couldn't allow herself to be.

Powerless.

Considering the way she rolled her eyes with a groan before putting her head on your shoulder and biting your skin as you pounded her into the air, she actually fucking enjoyed it.

She'll have to assess.. everything later, but for now she didn't care. Not when you're having your way with her.

Moment you have her up in the air is the moment her mind goes I fear

Like you mean to tell her that she's?? Up in the air without her fucking power??? Because you're tall enough for you to just. Lift her up?????? Her feet aren't touching the ground and the realisation has her juices GUSHING out ohhhhmy god

Not just the fact that she feels so powerless with you, but the way that her feeling small in your arms = her feeling safe as well???? Like you're her barrier from the world that's done her wrong time and time again, the world that's taken the most important things—people—away from her. Being fucked like this in your arms helps her forget all those for a while and feel safe and small, like she's the one being taken care of this time instead of the other way around

She wouldn't be asking you to do this again though, mind you..........but she does look at you and sizes you up and really that's all you need as a notice of what she wants 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[waterkittywriting]

Again with me! I have a lot of ideas lately😭

I hope I'm not disturbing you

I request a clingy reader(fem!reader) with Chuuya(can be incest or no, your choice), I will say headcannons or not, so basically, they get in a argument, and Chuuya hits her!!! Out of anger! *gasp* :O

And chuuya tries and will make it up to her

Can be smut!

Angst to Fluff to maybe Smut????

I'll Make It Up To You

Warnings: Fem!reader, Slight manipulation, Hurt/veryminimalcomfort, chuuya being a freaking meanie, I'm much better at hcs but I wanted to practice doing oneshots, Kinda ooc

Characters: Chuuya

A/N: ilysm you are NOT disturbing me 💯 please keep requesting!!! You give me tons of motivation. All I have on this account is smut so I just made it hurt/comfort I hope that's okay 😇😇

Your front door slams, you hear shit falling off the walls and know he must be pissed. You creep down the stairs, tip toeing over to your boyfriend, pulling him into a hug. "Not in the mood." He grumbles, pushing you off by the head.

You wince a little at the pain of him tugging your hair, but say nothing about it. "Did you have a bad day at work?" You ask gently, taking a step back. "Oh my God, can't you just leave me alone? Are you capable of that?!" He snaps, turning around, glaring daggers into your eyes. "..Chuuya.. I just wanted to make sure you're oka-" Smack!

You look up at him, and he stares down with guilty eyes. Neither of you say anything until.. "Chuuya! What the fuck!" You take another step back, trying to stop the tears welling in your eyes from falling. "What is wrong with you??" You yell, your voice squeaky.

"Doll.. I'm sorry. You know I just had a bad day at work." He sounded exasperated. Really? Over him hitting you?? You storm back up the stairs, into your shared bedroom, and lock the door behind you.

You slide down the walls, head in your hands as you contemplate everything that had just happened. Was it really your fault for bothering him? No, it couldn't have been, those ads you see on YouTube.. those billboards on the road, always say it's never the victims fault. But are you really a victim? He only hit you once.. does the really count. You sat here for a minute, your mind pacing.

Your train of thought is broken by a small knock on the door. You stand up immediately to open the door, but you stand in the way of letting him in. He looked guilty, genuinely, really guilty. "Baby girl.. I'm sorry.. I just-" you cut him off. "Yeah, you fucking should be!" You yell, the tears starting to fall from your eyes. "..Isn't that a bit.. dramatic?" He groans.

"Dramatic? You're calling me dramatic now?" You scoff, staring at him in the eye. He sighs. "Bunny.. you know that's not what I meant, please, just let me make it up to you." Bunny, Doll, Babygirl, you were fucking tired of it.

"Stop with the fucking pet names you cunt! I'm pissed at you and you're calling me baby girl?!" You can't help but laugh. You're so angry and it's not funny but you just can't stop laughing. "What is wrong with you?" You ask, watching a pang of guilt in his eyes, "Ill.. um.. ill give you some more time." You swear you could hear his voice getting all squeaky and high pitched too, but you didn't comment on it.

You sat on your bed, contemplating the meaning of your existence, when you check your phone. It had been two hours since he came up to check on you, two hours since you made him feel shittier than he made you. You felt like such a terrible person.

You get off your bed, slowly opening the door and creeping downstairs to the living room where Chuuya is sitting on the couch with a glass of wine and a book. He looked.. unbothered. Meanwhile you had tears and mascara streaming down your face.,

"Chuuya?" You whimper, he looks up, sighs and looks back down at his book, patting the couch next to him. "Come sit down." He mumbles, turning the page. You practically run over to the couch, digging your face into his side, he wraps his arm around your curled body as he sighs and puts the book down, keeping the wine.

"..I'm sorry. What I did was not right. There's no excuse for me to hit you like that." You hear his voice shaking, and you know he feels guilty. "It's okay.." you can't tell if you're telling the truth. You don't know whether it's okay. Can it ever be okay? "I'm sorry too.. for yelling at you and calling you a cunt." You sniffle, feeling, embarrassed? You felt overdramatic, like you needed to stop making a big deal out of such a little thing. It wasn't his fault, he was just stressed.

"Don't stress it." He sighs, leaning back into the couch. "I love you." He mumbles, and you mutter it right back, just like always. "I love you." That was true. And you knew that, and that's all that mattered. You two love each other and sometimes people in love make mistakes. Just keep telling yourself that.

"I'll make it up to you sweets." He mumbles, putting his glass down and laying his head on top of yours. "It's gonna be okay, I won't let this happen again." It feels like he's talking to himself more than you, but you still appreciate the sentiment.

"I love you." You whisper, one more time, before falling into a deep, well needed sleep.

[suugarbabe]

alright wifey, here's a little request for ya. I'm thinking enzo in a modern au at a haunted house or something and he works there as a scareactor, reader is being dragged there by their friends and gets scared by like everything. maybe a little mean enzo like at first he just finds it funny how actually terrified they get when he scares them so he starts following the group to pop out at them everywhere but like he also thinks it's kinda cute?? also I need him to wear a mask. maybe after reader goes on a mission to find that annoying actor to rip that stupid mask off his face and then they realize oh this guy is kinda fine. hope this makes at least a little bit of sense, love youuu 💕💕💕

I love love love that you suggested Enzo because I think his build (at least how I see him) is perfect for this 😇 and perfect for spoooky season 🎃

an: this turned out waaaay longer than anticipated, i may have gotten carried away in the spirit of the season; hope it does not suck

Frustrated. Livid. Infuriated. Pick a synonym for anger and you were feeling it right now at every single one of your friends that have dragged you to this god awful haunted house. And it seemed like you were the only one who felt this way. Around you were squeals and giggles from people excited to either enter the haunted house or playful screams from those being approached by the scare actors tasked with keeping the patrons adrenaline up before entering the main attraction.

Your arm was looped with your friends next to you and you squeezed her closer as two short clowns came dancing by, giggling and twisting their heads this way and that at the people in line. “Babes, I love you, but if you hold my arm any tighter I might be able to join the crew as the new one armed woman,” Daphne started teasing, even though she, herself, also took another step backwards with you as what appeared to be a headless man holding a rotting jack o lantern on stilts made its way through the crowded line.

"Listen, I agreed to come. I did not agree I would enjoy it; this is your own doing," your hold did not loosen as the line began to move forward. A girl about your height stood at the entry, clad in what looked like an old hospital gown covered in different splats of blood; some that looked like handprints. Her hair styled in two messy pig tails atop her head with the makeup on her face applied to make her look more pale and sickly.

Her voice was higher in pitch as she counted the people being ushered in through the entrance door, "One, two, oh you will do quite nicely, yes; five, six, beautiful jacket I hope it survives without getting blood on it." You and your friends just barely made the cut, settling into the room with the others. Your plan was to hover in the background, hoping that if you avoided the front that other people would take the brunt of the horror of the house.

The sickly looking scare actor's voice was suddenly right behind you, so close it felt like she was whispering in your ear and causing you to nearly jump out of your skin, "Most people think that the back is the safest place to be, but it's far easier to get left behind," she circled around your left side, head titled and pig tails dangling. The singular white contact in her right eye made her look a little extra deranged which only made you shudder more, "We wouldn't want that happening to you, now would we?"

All you could manage was a quick shake of your head as a sickly high pitched giggle then erupted from her lips as she maneuvered her way to the front of the room where three doors stood on the back wall. "Our house is full of fun and adventures," she slapped her hand against the door in the middle; a loud, ripping of a chainsaw sounded causing a number of people in the group to jump. "I never leave because my friends are here and we just have the best time playing," she slapped her hand against the door to her right. A sharp, piercing but muffled scream emitted from behind the wood, "HELP ME, PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME, GET ME OUT OF HERE, SHE WON'T LET ME GO!"

The sickly girl held her hand up to her mouth as she smiled and softly laughed, "She is so silly, isn't she silly?" She asked a woman in front of her who seemed to nod in agreeable just to avoid what may have come with telling her no. The sickly girl then pointed and wagged her finger at the door on the right, pouting her lips, "I'll deal with you later, friend."

She turned back to the group, unsettling smile almost too wide on her face. She walked sideways to the door on the left, placing her handle, "The glowing arrows show the way if you were to choose not to stay," she opened the door wide, plastic flaps you would seat in a meat cooler hanging in the doorway. "Remember, don't touch my friends and they won't touch you," the front of the group started through, the sound of the plastic flapping against the walls on the other side.

As you and your friends began to enter, the sickly girl was behind you again, "And don't get left behind." You gasped, turning around only to be met with the door slamming in your face. A large white sign with what was supposed to look like blood (but you were hoping was just paint) read "NOT AN EXIT" dripping down. You turned back round to see Daphne starting to walk away from you.

Hurriedly you caught up to her, holding on the the sleeve of her jacket and your group began to maneuver themselves around the maze like hallways. You weren't completely wrong about your idea to stay in the back. There were a few jump scares by scare actors while in the halls that by time you reached them they simply growled or barred their teeth or fake (very real looking) weapons towards you.

"I fucking hate it here, Daphne, I will never forgive you for this--fuckING BLOODY GOD DAMN SHIT HELL!" As the rest of the group began to enter a large black lit room with what sounded like a dozen creepy clowns in cages, a lone scare actor with a mask leap from behind the door right in front of you. His mask was not necessarily scary, per say. But the realistic ness made it all the more creepy.

He towered over you, his mask emulating similarly to an old porcelain doll with a few exceptions. There were large holes in each eye, so what you were terrifyingly looking into were the actors actual eyes. A large crack went across the left brow to his cheek, dark almost black looking blood coming from it. The bottom jaw was separated, but held together to the top half of the face with wire threading through where the lips should be. This gap allowed you to see where his lips should be coated in fake blood.

You were frozen to the spot, the scare actor in front of you flashing a smile of perfectly white teeth had they not had smudges of blood over them, "You're getting left behind, love." You turned your head to see your friends in front of you again, hustling your way back to them. You grabbed onto Astoria's arm this time instead, "I hate it here, I hate it here, I hate it here." Astoria just laughed, encouraging you to 'just have fun with it', as you all made it through the first room and into the next.

Something was starting to make you think being there was actually making you go crazy as it seemed like the same porcelain masked man was in every other room in the house. He popped through the window of the run down shed seemingly aiming to scare you directly as his low deep voice called out to you, "Hiya, darling," Another string of curses flew from your mouth, "Shit shit fucking shitfuck." You tried your best to push your friends further in the group, swearing you heard a low chuckle behind you.

He was seemingly chained against a wall two rooms after that, arms spread on either side of his head. While everyone else in the room was being frightened by the other actors, Porcelain mask seemed to be calling out to you once more. "C'mon baby, come and save me, won't you set me...free," you let out a high pitched screech, jumping further away from the wall as one of his hands seemed to burst from the chains and grab out at you."

"It's fine," Daphne assured you, "he's not going to touch you if you don't touch him remember?" You started walking in front of her, "I know that, but someone should remind him." Astoria playfully rolled her eyes as she held the curtain back for you to enter the next room. It seemed as if you were in the clear of Porcelain mask, the last two rooms you went through having no sign of him.

To exit the haunted house you had to go through a more narrow, very dark (very dark) hallway to the last door. It was a swinging door on side hinges, you knew it was the last one because every person who exited in front of you gave way to the sounds outside. So close, you're so close, you kept chanting to yourself like a mantra. It seemed like the only real scares in this area were random recordings of screams or quick flashes of light on a grim scene on one of the walls.

Keeping your eyes forward and aimed at your target (the door), another flash of light occurred. Only this time, you saw him. Porcelain mask was standing flat against the wall and when the light flashed, his head jerked quickly, looking straight. at. you. Trying to keep your cool you held your eyes to the same spot as to be aware of where he was and be able to dodge any attempt he would make.

Only when the light flashed again he was gone from the spot. Thrust into darkness again you went to grab Daphne's hand in front of you. Something wasn't right; why did her hand feel so...large. Another flash of light and you see that Porcelain mask is not only in front of you...but you were holding his hand.

Once again cloaked in darkness you were pushed against the wall as the lights began to strobe. The scare actor had a large hand on each side of your head, tall and broad towering over you. The flash from light to dark ness made his movements all the more horrifying as he tilted his head to the side before slowing bringing the mouth of his mask next to you ear, "Do I frighten you, angel?"

You ducked underneath his arms and bolted for the exit door. Pushing through it harshly, the hinges creaking as you made your exit, you frantically searched for your friends. "Over hear!" Daphne waved you over some ten meters from the exit, "You nearly did get left behind huh?" She meant it as a playful joke, erupting in teasing laughter as you flipped her off.

Over her shoulder you saw none other than Porcelain mask exiting the haunted house and heading towards a fenced off area. "I'll be right back," you tossed over your shoulder at your friends as you made your way in the same direction as the person that was torturing you all night.

You found that, luckily, the area wasn't really fenced off, and you were able to slip through a slightly open portion to what you discovered was like a 'break' area for the scare actors. You glanced around, spotting the porcelain mask sitting on top of a picnic table, three or four scare actors standing around and chatting.

In some new found confidence that was bubbling in your veins, you marked right up the table, snatching the mask and holding it up, "Who's is this?" A creepy clown and bloody hospital patient took a step back. In front of you, a tall man with soft brunette hair turned around locking your stare with his, "Looking for me?"

You wrapped an arm around your middle, "Y-yeah, who do you think you are, huh?" The man laughed lightly, "I'm Enzo, so very please to be formally introduced. And that's mine, angel. Can I have it back?" He wore a shit eating smirk, coffee brown eyes twinkling with delight.

The mask was most definitely his. The only horror makeup on his face where the crack in the eye would be and around his mouth. You stood up slightly taller, "No, Enzo, you can't have it back." His eyebrows shot up cockily, "Oh? And why's that?" You stared at him dumbstruck for a moment. His eyes had a playful glint, smirk so deep that dimples popped into each cheek.

You felt a blush creep up your neck under his gaze but you did your best to keep your voice steady as you spoke, "You think that just because you have adorable little dimples under this mask that I'm not going to be mad at you for following me around all night?" His head tilted slightly at this, not much unlike when he had you pinned against the wall in the last hall, "You think my dimples are adorable, hmm?"

Scoffing you look off to the side to break eye contact, "I, erm-" He cut you off, taking a step closer to you, your knees hitting the back of the bench, you reach for the tabletop behind you, clamoring back until you're sitting atop the table. This does nothing but give him leverage as he leans forward now, placing a hand on the table on either side of your hips. "S'alright, you're quite adorable too," he leaned in closer, "s'why I followed you around all night. Cute little angel with the sailors tongue." He was so close, lips ghosting near the shell of your ear as he spoke, "Wonder what else I can make you scream."

[pfhwrittes]

hey p this is nobody you know but do you have thoughts about depot mouse seeing something they shouldn't have seen? 😇

hello friend! (who i definitely don't know, no siree) i waffled over this and my search results are now full of dubiously legal activities that i definitely haven't ever seen in practice, not even once mr/ms/mx GCHQ person checking online traffic. (i also got distracted by portakabin set ups, but that's a separate issue.) and then my brain spat this out for the tradieverse.

does it answer the prompt? eh, vaguely. but i hope you'll be pleased with it.

tags/tw: non-sexual semi-nudity, russian pet names (pchelka = little bee, myshka = mouse, milaya = darling/sweetie/dearest), light angst at the end, and a very brief mention of choking.

author's note: barely skimmed for typos and bad grammar as always and a patented (by @/391780) abrupt ending because i couldn't figure out how to end it and it was getting away from me.

at this point, you're certain nikolai thinks it's funny to have you running around after him. flitting from your office to the driver's "lounge" (another portakabin, this time outfitted with a row of lockers, a sagging sofa, a table and set of scattered chairs, and a small kitchenette area), you yank open the door and your waspish comments die on your tongue.

nikolai is leaning against the counter of the kitchenette. in his pants. in just his pants.

unbidden your eyes skate over his broad shoulders, down over a glimmering gold chain that is nestled in thick, dark hair that spreads wildly over his chest to a soft stomach, to land on the tightest pair of black briefs you've ever seen.

"hello, myshka." nik's voice snaps you out of your staring and you feel heat flooding your cheeks as you tear your gaze away from his... underwear to meet his amused brown eyes.

"i, um, i was looking for you." you absolutely do not let your eyes drop below his neck as nik redistributes his weight as he laughs.

"and now you have found me." nik grins, a flash of surprisingly white teeth considering the amount of black tea and cigarettes he imbibes.

"yes, i wanted to - sorry, but why exactly are you in your pants?" you blurt out.

nik shrugs his broad shoulders and you drag your gaze up to look just past his left ear where a damp lock of black hair curls lazily.

"my clothes are wet." he says simply, like that explains everything. it probably does, knowing the very little you do know about nik.

there's a beat of silence where nik continues to grin and you ignore the way your neck and face are blazing with heat.

"right." you clear your throat uncomfortably. "anyway, i need your receipts."

"it's no problem, i've already handed them to farah." nik waves your words off with a lazy flap of his hand.

"yes, it is a problem! you can't just hand your receipts off to the head of the company, nikolai!" you huff irritably and nikolai interrupts you with a loud boisterous laugh.

"ah, pchelka." he sighs fondly, "always so busy running around, you miss what's right in front of your nose."

that brings you up short and you scowl furiously at him. of course he would think that, all he has to worry about to getting from the depot to the job site and back again. he isn't having to chase wayward drivers around for scraps of paper, or answering the phone to a disgruntled jonathan price when he can't get hold of nikolai, or answering emails with the subject line "how much 4 hardcore??" that you hope to god have come from a bot and not some sad, lonely weirdo thinking that a haulage company offers pornography.

the grin on nik's face flickers slightly and you see his eyes are no longer amused, but soft, almost apologetic.

"sweetness, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to imply-"

"it's fine." you interrupt him, your tone has gone flat and professional despite the way frustration burns at your lungs, urging you to unload all of your irritation on the man. "i'll just go ask farah for the receipts."

nik takes a step towards you.

"milaya -"

"no, really nik." you turn away to push at the door, "thank you for your help as always." you shove open the door and stomp across the dirt to the office you share with farah, leaving nik behind you in his underpants.

(later in the afternoon, after you had emailed farah to send you copies of nikolai's receipts, you lean back in your chair and refuse to let your mind drift back to the glittering gold chain resting on nik's collarbone.

and if you do, it's only because you're thinking about wrapping it around your fist to strangle the insufferable man with it, honest. )

[brown-sugar-89]

Would it be funny if,, you draw that, goober? He is like, cheesy and stuff,,, He and Noise are rivals tho, don't think they like each other aha 💦

Also I've been following your account since the early beginning I believe?? And I'm always happy when I see you post!! (I'm eating very well!!) 💖💖 whenever I see one of your drawings I show them to my friends irl!! ★ (they love too)

Also I swear that Pizzybot makes my heart sink, when I first saw em, I instantly fell in love ((platonically, I specified in case)), like ermm, don't think I'm planning to do something malicious about em later aha!! I just like them a little bit... Not gonna draw them in the future at all!! 😇😇✨

Sorry I got the zoomies when I wrote that, I really really like your stuff man!! ★ Plus I rarely ask for request,,

O=H MY GOD I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS ASK❤️❤️❤️

I've almost teared up! It's so nice of you to follow my art for that long time and admitting this to me!!! I appreciate this so much and will gladly draw silly nacho guy!! He reminds me of one of my favorite characters too, so it's extra nice.. Hope it's good enough, I didn't have much time but I tried my best to capture his essence!!!

I made second doodle when I remembered that he and The Noise are prolly rivals, soooo.. Yeah!!!! Thank you for your kind words so much!!!! Have a nice day. <333

[prettynice8]

Hidan x preferably male reader

Okay I’m going anon because this is gonna be KINKY

Um anyway haha I’m talking hair pulling

I’m talking like uh biting

umm umm 😇 oh yeah like um

idk fucking…um maybe can you do A fucking trans ftm reader or some shit idfk if it’s just male that’s cool too i don’t know

like i don’t know sex that’s what usually happens ⁉️

i don’t know I’m so tired right now 😭 this is turning out not that kinky OH SHIT WAIT choking yeah that too but it needs to be HIM anyway yeah 😎 yeah anyway thanks im so tired so im not editing fucking *shit* but yeah hope this is readable anyway thanks bye im gonna go take a nap 😍

oh yeah but then it’s like he calls you a Bitch etc because it’s da- Hidan like ⁉️ anyway but we know he loves us 😌 stupid man couldn’t last a day without us with his horny ahh 😝😚✌️ okay bye for real why is this so long help im sorry they say im chatty but wow but yeah now bye 🥲💀

OMFG this was so funny I can't

Hidan x ftm male reader

This guy

Stuff: swearing, degradation, BDSM?, kinky shit, choking, biting, possessive Hidan, hair pulling, dom Hidan, subby reader, top Hidan, bottom reader, smashing, rough sex, hints of fluff

Word Count: 1,036

Notes: by far the most entertaining request I've gotten. And sorry if this isn't quite right, I'm cis so I don't know a whole lot. happy pride

Hidan had been gone for an awful long time on Akatsuki duty, a whole 3 months to be exact, far too long from his home, and more importantly far too long from his adorable little boyfriend. Though he's been gone even longer, this trip felt particularly difficult because he missed your final bottom surgery, and he secretly felt terrible.

Right when he walks into the house, he sees you and his gruff demeanor quickly brightens up, but just as quickly drops since he has to keep up a certain image and fawning over his boyfriend didn't particularly fit that.

The moment you see him your face beams, so you run and jump into his arms, which thankfully he's quick enough to catch you.

"I've missed you so much honey." You stated with a massive smile on your face. Hidan does his cool guy thing and simply gives you a slight smirk.

"God, you're acting so clingy, so fucking annoying." He said coldly. "How'd the surgery go?" He asked, clearly his compassion for you getting the better of him.

"Pretty well, it felt weird at first, guess you're lucky you didn't have to be there for the worst parts." You answered, still brightly smiling at him.

He looked down at you with an apologetic look for a moment, "Sorry I wasn't, I'll try better to stay with you." He said, his cool guy persona practically destroyed at this point, but you had to open your fucking mouth.

"Aw, you care about meeee." You cheekily exclaimed, causing his light smirk to darken into a glare.

"I care about you fucking ass, speaking of which..." He replied before tightly gripping your ass.

You yelp gayly at his tight grip before your bright smirk returns to your face, though in your eyes now there's a burning hint of lust. "Fuck yeah!" You cheered brightly before Hidan pulled your hair, pulling your head to the side and exposing your neck, which he dived into the crook of your neck, attaching his canines to the spot.

He starts aggressively nipping at your neck, you would call them love bites but with the way he does it, they're hate bites, but you still continue to moan lightly. He continues this assault on your neck before going to sucking.

He sucks at a certain part of your neck, leaving a dark purple mark in his wake, causing your moans to get even louder. He multiplies into several deep purple marks until your neck is a mess of purple and red marks scattered throughout.

Hidan continues his sucking even through carrying you to your guys' shared bed, only stopping after finally laying you down. He then crashes his lips into yours, creating a kiss made of only teeth and tongue.

His kiss is powerful as his tongue completely dominates your own, causing you to moan deeply into the kiss. He then tries out your brand of penis, cupping the clothed member in his hand, causing your sounds to become even more frequent in the passionate kiss.

He takes your pants off and starts jerking you off, pumping his hand along your now hard cock.

"How is it? Now I have a new way to make you act like a fucking slut." He stated, both tightening and quickening his grip on your cock, causing you to moan at an ear shattering noise as you burst into his hand.

He licks up the cum on his hand, licking up as much as he can before stripping the rest of your clothes off you, and then soon after his own.

Hidan then flips you over so that you're on all fours and winds his hand up, causing it to quickly come crashing down on your ass in a powerful spank. You shriek in a mix of pain and pleasure, loving that you have your boyfriend back and he hasn't changed at all.

He roughly pulls your hair back to gently kiss you on the cheek, the duality of men. "I missed you." He said lightly. What a kind and uncharacteristic thing to say, he fixes this by plunging his cock into your already lubricated hole.

You already prepared before he came home. Hidan is a lot of things and one of them is consistent. He doesn't give your preparation a single thought as he thrusts his hips roughly into you, pounding the shape of his cock back into you.

"Sorry bitch, I just figured that you've probably gotten too tight, I had to re-loosen you up." He said, and loosen you up he does.

He thrusts his cock wildly and almost painfully into you, causing your moans to only crescendo and fill the room, along with the sound of skin quickly slapping into each other.

He wraps his hand back around your hard member, only quickening, because of course he still can, his pace into you. Hidan matches the pace of his hips with that of his hand, making you putty into his hands, literally, since he causes you to once again burst in his hand.

He quickened his pace as he reached his upcoming orgasm, filling your insides with his warm seed. He slows down his hips, gently rubbing your sides that have been bruised by the same hands, but he is far from done.

He goes right back to fucking you, his big cock rearranging your insides. His hands pull you hair back so painfully that tears develop in your eyes, a mix of the pain and amazing pleasure you were feeling, evident from how you have your now third orgasm of the night, eliciting the loudest moan yet, which is saying a lot.

He quickly flips you over and traps you into a deep and powerful kiss, one that is strangely warm and loving from him, before he once again cums in your abused hole.

He keeps his cock in your ass, still very far from being done, but he wants to stay like this with you for a few moments, holding you tight in his arms as he rests his head on your chest.

He gently traces the scars there, happy to have this moment with you. "Hope you're ready for round 3 bitch."

THE END

[rhey-007]

Hey

Fave falcon and winter soldier scenes??

(The gifs are not mine, found them on pinterest)

Oh! That's a really interesting question!

So, my faves are just the classics (I'm a simple person) but they still make me cackle 🤭

This for obvious reasons 👀 and Sam's face

Besties just walking in their costumes as if nothing

Is there much to say? I don't ship them necessarily but that was funny, as well as the whole jumping out scene and the bloopers

The big three and Hobbit talk (? I don't remember the book Bucky mentioned I'm sorry 😔 correct me pls)

This older classic (ik it's not from the series but still wanted to include it)

Uncle Bucky :3

THIS

This shot is just so beautiful kznxmxndjjdncnx

Dancing Zemo ofc ❤️‍🔥 Slay diva 💅

This HAD to be here too

The TT 🤭

And last but not least our beloved running lesbians and Sam complaining about those God damn heels 😇

And I think there was this one where Bucky destroyed Sam's drone but I don't remember if it actually happened in the series or any of the films or if it's just my brain playing tricks on me 🤔🫠

[jakeperalta]

NOT FRIENDS 🙅‍♀️❌️ no we're somewhere in between ↔️ 'cause you're awful 😒🙄 and I miss you 😔 and I killed you 🔪☠️ in my dream LAST NIGHT 😴🛏 even then you didn't care 😶🤷‍♂️ it's a low when even in my dreams you still don't want me there 🥲 GOT FRIENDS 👭 got at least a healthy five 5️⃣ yeah some people think I'm funny 🤣 baby don't look so surprised 🤭 WE THINK that your girlfriend 👩 is a bore 🥱🫣 but we're nice to her in public 🤗 'cause we're grown up and mature 😇 NOT FRIENDS 🙅‍♀️❌️ 'cause when I asked you on the train 🚆 why you hurt me and you couldn't really actually explain 🤔 I CRIED 😭😢 then I told you it was cool 👍 GOD YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED AT ALL 😤