#god i suck so much :/ gotta improve

[arolesbianism]

I wanna make art for my dst roleswap au sooo bad but at the same time I think if I had to deal with even a single person deadnaming Wx on my posts I would snap

[frudoo]

Your new Baker!Simon AU has me hooked! 🤩😊 Retired!Ghost baking away in the comfort of his home, just needing something to improve his lil’ therapy-inspired business… someone like Food-Photographer!Reader ;) You gotta tell me how absolutely OVERBOARD he goes with the dessert(s) when they schedule their first meet up. Pleeeaaaseeee?

I’m obsessed!!! ^-^ Can’t wait to hear anything else you come up with, dear Writer! Thank you for being you 🫡

Much love, keep yourself happy ‘n’ healthy and get Simon some more dough (Get it? Money = dough? But also dough ‘cause he’s a baker? Hahah. Hah…)! <3

Changed it up a bit 😉

Previous

Warnings: Body image issues, mentions of therapy.

Simon is up to his elbows in baked goods. There’s no room on the kitchen island for the tray of espresso-flavored macarons he just prepared, so he has to set them on the coffee table in his living room. On the overcrowded counter is an array of cupcakes of various flavors—chocolate, cookie butter, ube (Kyle made him try the flavor when the 141 went to the Philippines for a trip and he fell absolutely in love), all arranged on separate platters that match their color. Each treat is decorated with perfect swirls of buttercream or topped with shiny luster dust.

He can’t remember the last time he’d baked so much. Maybe it was Price’s retirement party? Honestly, he doesn’t remember much of that night, but boy does he remember the morning after. Simon can recall how he got every single scar on his broad body, but not one of those painful experiences even scratches the surface of that fucking hangover. Nevertheless, it’s been a long, long time since he’s baked so many sweets. He didn’t even eat breakfast before he started working, and that was… six hours ago? Bloody hell, how is it already nearly time?

One look at the clock and Simon is scrambling to get dressed—jeans that hang low on his waist and a simple black tee. Both fabrics stretch around the muscles he’s maintained despite the growing layer of fat around his belly. He pats his torso as he looks at himself in the mirror, cleft lip scrunched up in distaste. Maybe he should lay off of all those “quality control” taste tests. He doesn’t have much time to think about it before his doorbell rings.

God, he doesn’t think he’s ever been so nervous in his life. Not through the amount of times he’s looked death right in the eye, not when his father would come clunking home absolutely hammered, not when he held Johnny’s hand to keep him awake and alert after Makarov shot him right in the temple. But you, this sweet, pretty girl who’s coming to see him—not even for a date!—has his fingers fidgeting and his heart racing in his chest. He sucks in a deep breath and counts to three, just like his therapist taught him, then opens the door.

Simon knows he’s in for it the moment he sees you look up at him in awe, trying to hide your shock with a crooked smile. Pretty round cheeks and a soft body—he’s doing his best not to look at the dip where your blouse exposes your cleavage—and plush lips that he’s dying to feel against his own. Fuck.

“I- uh… Simon? I-I’m here about the- um. My treats. Your treats! My camer- pictures! I’m here to take pictures of your… treats.”

The man can practically see the mental faceplant you just gave yourself, and for some reason, it calms his nerves. You’re human, and you’re real, and you’re beautiful. And you’re waiting for him to invite you in.

“Pleasure. C’mon in, jus’ mind the… er. The clutter.”

Simon opens the door wider and you thank him softly, gasping when you see the amount of goodies all over his kitchen and even overflowing into the living room. There must be at least a hundred cupcakes and a few dozen macarons. It stuns you for a second but his gentle hand on your shoulder brings you back to reality. You clear your throat and smile up at him.

“You really went all out!” You giggle a bit and Simon’s heart just about leaps out of his chest—he shrugs.

“Ligh’ work,” he jokes.

You’re embarrassed by the snort that slips out of you, covering your mouth as your eyes go wide, but Simon thinks it’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. He needs to snap out of it. This is business. Simon runs a hand through his slightly overgrown hair sheepishly, gesturing towards the camera that hangs by a strap on your neck.

“Oh, r-right. Did you wanna be in the photos? Get you a nice new profile picture?” You ask with a grin, carefully slipping past him to examine his work more closely. “People typically like to know the face of the person they’re ordering from.”

Simon bites the inside of his cheek, debating. The military instilled such a strict rule in him. He never posts his face out of fear someone from his past will come knocking down his door to carry out a vendetta. He was thorough in his SAS days, never allowing himself to be caught without the infamous Ghost mask, but regardless, he deems it too much of a risk. He’s thankful you seem to understand his hesitation.

“We could do a picture of you holding up a tray so it’s just your chest and arms? I could crop your face out, or we don’t have to include you in it at all. It’s up to you.”

Too fucking sweet for your own good.

“Chest ‘n’ arms’ll be fine, love,” he grunts finally, offering you a small smile.

“Sounds like a plan,” you look back to nod at him before grabbing the camera from around your neck. “Where do you wanna start?”

“Wha’ever’s easiest f’you,” Simon hums, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall to watch as you twist and turn every confectionary to find the best angle.

You’re quiet when you’re focused. The only sounds he can hear are the shutters of the camera snapping a picture or your footsteps as you step around the counter to capture every little feature of the whimsical delicacies. It’s odd. Simon doesn’t mind quiet—prefers it most of the time—but he can’t help but crave the sound of your voice explaining to him every single thought going through your head. He blames it on curiosity.

It takes all of twenty minutes for you to get every picture you need of his confections, with varying angles and lighting changes. You walk over to him and go through the photos, explaining every little detail you loved or why you changed up the order of things for a particular shot. Simon nods in approval—he genuinely could not tell the difference between most of them, but like hell he’s going to tell you that, not when you’re this close, looking up at him with that sweet, hopeful smile.

“Looks perfect t’me,” he breathes, giving you a soft pat on the back.

“Thank you,” you sniffle. “So… did you still wanna do that profile picture?”

“I- er, tha’s fine. Where d’ya need me?”

“Right over… here!” You gently grab him by his bicep and pull him to where there’s a blank wall and a good amount of light.

Simon stands in place like a studious muse while you rearrange some of his treats on one of his circular platters. You place the tallest cupcakes near the back, the smaller ones in the middle, then position the macarons in a way that showcases both their shiny tops and the perfect bake he got on them. Cautiously, you grab the tray and take it over to him.

“Here, hold it just- yeah, just like that. Perfect.”

You bite your lip when you carefully maneuver his arms into a position where the light captures the depth of his faded tattoos and prickling veins—you convince yourself it’s to give the picture more personality. Simon’s just glad that his face won’t be visible. He’s praying right now that you don’t notice how fucking red he’s gotten just from your delicate touches and the way you stare at his arms and chest. It makes him feel insecure and as a result he sucks in his belly. His heart skips a beat when you frown.

“Don’t do that,” you whisper, hesitating before lightly placing your hand on his stomach to encourage him to relax. “Looks better like this.”

In less than ten words—far fewer than his therapist has spoken over the past few years, fewer than every single uplifting word he’s written in his journals—you’ve managed to silence the unrest in his head that tells him he’s not good enough, if only just for a few moments. His breath hitches in his throat as you step back to take a final picture. Satisfied, you take the platter from his hands and set it aside, giving him a shy grin.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep-”

“No, don’t apologize. I, uh… I needed tha’. Thank you,” his voice trails off as he looks down at you.

You nod shortly, sucking in a deep breath. He’s so close and it makes you dizzy.

“Right. I guess I’ll head out, and as soon as I get the pictures edited, I’ll send them to you?” You bite your lip and Simon has to resist the urge to lean in and take a nip for himself.

“Oh, please, take some o’this. I don’t know wha’ t’do w’all of it,” he scratches the back of his neck timidly.

Taking one last quick look around his house, you hum thoughtfully.

“I have an idea.”

[redpill-tfs]

Red Wave

January 1st, 2025

Yo, so I started this Red Wave trial thing today. The docs said it’s supposed to, like, make your brain work better or something. Was told to track my thoughts in this journal thing. Honestly, I’m just here for the cash. I’m not buying into any of their science-y shit. Took the first pill this morning. Feel normal so far. Guess we’ll see if this stuff actually does anything.

Since I was told to describe myself a bit, I guess I might as well if I want that cash they promised. Name's Blake. I'm 26 and work at a local manufacturing company in the finance department. It's a pretty chill gig. Don't gotta wear a suit either which is good. Didn't even wear one to my graduation and I don't plan on starting now.

Anyway bro, I'm also a proud atheist. Never got into politics, but I guess I'm more liberal. I mean, just let people do what they want, right?

February 10th, 2025

Alright, not gonna lie, I’ve been feeling kinda sharp lately. Like, my head’s clearer, and I’m getting more stuff done at work. My boss Emily even said my presentation didn’t totally suck, which is rare. Oh, and I actually ironed my shirt today before work. Don’t know why—just felt like I should look decent. Weird, right? Maybe these pills aren’t total BS. I don't know why, but I've been thinking of wearing a tie to work...

March 12th, 2025

So get this, man: I bought a suit over the weekend. A whole grownup suit and a tie to go with it. I dunno know why, but I just felt like stepping up my game for my presentation at work today. And man did I look good. I got so many compliments on my fit. It honestly felt really good. My bros thought it was weird and so do I, but now that I have it I guess I'll use it at another presentation in the future.

April 15th, 2025

Something weird is going on. I heard some chick at work talking about her church today. Instead of scoffing and rolling my eyes, it made me, like, think a little. Like I got curious about it. I don't know what's going on, but I might have to check it out sometime.

Speaking of work, I've been wearing a tie more and more. It feels... right. People seem to notice too. I get so many compliments about them. I went back to the store and pick out a whole bunch of different colors. I may be the only guy in the department wearing one, but standing out isn't a bad thing I guess.

May 18th, 2025

Alright, so… I went to church today. Yeah, me. Blake, the proud atheist. Walked past St. Mark’s on the way to grab Starbuck's, and something just made me stop and go in. The music was kind of awesome, and the pastor’s talk about purpose hit me harder than I expected. I don’t even know what’s happening to me, but I’m starting to think there’s more to life than what I’ve been living. I might go back next week to see what I've been missing, but I'm not sure yet.

June 30th, 2025

This morning, I prayed. Like, actually prayed to God. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it, but it felt… good. I’ve also started reading bits of the Bible over the past week. There’s some deep stuff in there. Work’s going great, too. I’ve been mentoring one of the new guys, and Emily says she’s impressed with my leadership. Suits are now my everyday thing. Who knew dressing sharp could feel so right?

July 23rd, 2025

I’ve been pulling away from my old friends. Their whole sarcastic, edgy vibe just doesn’t sit right with me anymore. Instead, I’ve been hanging out with people from church who share my interest in self-improvement and faith. I’m even thinking about joining a volunteer group at the church. Life feels more meaningful now. My mind still feels so clear too. I don't know what this pill is doing to me, but it's working.

August 11th, 2025

I’ve been reflecting on some big ideas lately: responsibility, tradition, family values. They make so much sense now. I’ve also started watching a few commentators online who align with these views. Their logic is compelling. Honestly, I don’t know how I didn’t see it before. It’s like a veil has been lifted. Why should abortion be legal? Why should we violate the second amendment with gun control laws? Why do gays think thy can decide how the rest of us live our lives? So many questions I'm learning the answers to. I never paid much attention to politics, but maybe I should.

September 7th, 2025

Sunday service has become the cornerstone of my week. I’ve officially joined St. Mark’s and volunteered for their community outreach. Pastor Williams’s guidance has been invaluable. I’m entirely committed to this new path. My wardrobe, my habits, even my worldview have all transformed. I’m proud of the man I’ve become. I've said this a million times already, but it just feels right.

October 20th, 2025

Today is my birthday, and reflecting on this past year astounds me. My former self seems like a stranger. I’ve embraced faith, order, and purpose, and it just feels right. I got my hair cut to be a lot shorter than I once had it as a special birthday gift to myself. It feels more appropriate for my new image.

I had some friends from bible study over for a small party. I wore my best suit for the occasion. We played games, ate good food, and prayed of course. There was a riveting debate on the role of faith in politics. All in all, it was a good time. I can't believe how much my life has changed just in 10 months.

November 30th, 2025

Today was the final day of the trial. The scientist leading the study asked me all sorts of questions, from my conservative views to my faith in God and my new sense of style. I'm not sure what it all has to do with a mental focus pill, but I didn't feel like asking questions. I'm sure they know what they're doing. Anyways, I better get going. St. Mark's is having an event today to celebrate God and all of His glory. I wouldn't miss it for the world.

December 1st, 2025

The Red Wave trial has concluded with a 100% conversion rate among participants. Subjects exhibited profound and permanent shifts in personality, behavior, and worldview. Pre-trial skepticism and liberal inclinations were entirely replaced with conservative, faith-based identities. This case highlights the pill's efficacy in aligning individuals with structured, traditional conservative values. Further research will examine long-term societal impacts of widespread application. More subjects needed.

[midnight1nk]

So, this week's episode...

[Spoilers below cut]

Past Ink: Guys, it's fine. This isn't a serious episode, it would be too soon for another arc. It's just gonna be another silly Saturday.

Current Ink: ....

(the following is my live reaction:)

[*unholy screaming*] FOUR NOOOOOOOOOOOO

WOW WHAT A GREAT START TO THIS EPISODE, SCRATCH EVERYTHING THAT I SAID ABOUT THIS BEING A "NORMAL" EPISODE

NOPE I NEED TO PAUSE, I NEED TO TAKE A WALK BC I'M NOT GONNA GET OVER IT, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS COULD LEAD

they're not gonna do it in this episode BUT the fact that goop!4 is being acknowledged in every way possible, we might just have a sequel in our hands

NO NO NO CUT THE INTRO, I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED THE EPISODE YET AND YOU WANT ME TO MAKE A THEORY ON IT ALREADY? HOLD YOUR FUCKIN HORSES, I'LL GET THERE GEEZ

anyway, we have to press play...

I'm pretty sure someone already has done a pirate au (no I'm not over what I just watched) and anyway, artists: here's pirate SMG4

Four, you should've read the file name before downloading it [*shakes head*]

Wait, is this going to be a parody of computer buddies? That's actually pretty fun..... OH NO NO NO

Ah, so we are doing computer buddies

Actually, yeah, can we have Mario as president please

love how it says "no one even compares to mario. especially smg4 who sucks booty cheeks [or ass] and mario doesn't"

Observe as the SMG4 fandom gets terrified of the word "perfect" [*screams*]

MARIO MARIO NO NO NO HE DIDN'T SAVE

I felt that in my core omg

as a graphic designer, this hurts

apparently, there's a whole new dimension in our computers, Only in the SMG4 Universe [*cheesy thumbs up*]

We really are getting all the computer buddies, huh? I wonder if KinitoPET will appear

[*silver the hedgehog voice*] It's no use!

BRITISH SMG3

wow what a funny bit... WAIT HOLD UP WAIT A MINUTE, LOOK AT THE MEDIA BOX

the eyes....

w̷̹̓e̷̼̽ ̸̯́n̴̩͆e̵̝̓v̴̼͑ë̵̤r̴͓͛ ̷̭͝l̵̦̎e̴̞͗f̵͉̐ṯ̴͗

and the left eye too... oh god, the EYE OF RA— [*gets shot*]

honestly, Four, you improved your aim ever since Western Spaghetti (ik you also did for PV but that's not the point)

I knew they were gonna bring in buff Luigi again

I'M SCREAMING

THERE IS NO WAY THE TEAM JUST DROPPED THAT ON US, THIS CAN'T BE REAL

ok first off, the fact that Four has a folder labeled "Super SECRET Spicy Memes" is giving "totally homework" folder energy (and I don't want to even think more about that)

hey, Four did say that Three brings some spice into his life (yeah, "rosemary to my bread" and all that jazz)

SECOND, the fact he has an image of SMG3 with him saying "whats the matter smg4 kun?"

THEN the "I know what you are" audio clip...

Four, buddy, you're down bad aren't you?

like "woah smg4's bisexual, I didn't know that", the closet is out of GLASS so we been knew but I DID NOT expect this

having Three be a tsundere is one thing, but FOUR....

🫵🏳️‍🌈⁉️

"they're dating behind the scenes" at this point, yeah

we have to keep going... [*secretly puts this clip on the fridge*]

I hate this so much /silly

[*chaos ensues*] [*sips my coffee*] just another tuesday saturday

GOTTA GO FAST GOTTA GO FAST— [*gets tazed*] i can never catch a break c'mon man

oh hey Swag!

four dollars is four dollars, you got yourself a deal

ok, I'm gonna need everyone to see Four's cute little hops here:

look at him go, my silly little goober :) oh, now you have? then let's keep going

holy shit, this fight scene is so well animated!!! LET'S GOOOO

never thought I'd see the day of seeing biblically accurate bonzi in an SMG4 episode and yet here we are.

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

THIS IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I'VE SEEN IN MY LIFE, I'M ASCENDING

"...but they hugged before" NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND

A normal hug, where two people cross each other and are unable to see the other's face since it's over their shoulder, is just as it is: a normal hug. It can be seen as platonic and/or romantic.

THIS is a lot more intimate. 3 and 4's heads touch while they hold each other by the hand. This type of hug is reserved more for romantic partners when the situation leads them to a devasting end, where they face each other to look at and remember what their partner looked like, one last time before they die.

In this case, it makes sense as the computer is collapsing within itself.

"It's not actually them tho." Yes, they're digital copies of 3 and 4 but that's the thing: they're COPIES, acting on what 3 and 4 would actually do

SMG34 shippers, we are eating GOOD today yum yum

but then, that begs the question: would there be a moment where 3 and 4 would reveal their feelings for each other at the worst possible time?

(you guys are not going to be ready for my next episode concepts) What, who said that?

uh anyway them 💙💜 gotta put it on the fridge

I feel for you, Four, but I have a horrible feeling about this

...

Foreshadowing is a literary device—

no seriously, I feel like this could be part of a future arc where a past villain would ruin everything Four has and would offer up a deal when Four would be the most desperate. There's always a catch. Hmm, why does that seem familiar...?

Your life's work or your friends, it's your call, SMG4

:)

HELL YEAH FOUR, THROW IT AWAY (omg just like how he chose Three over the USB, I'm crying dude)

also congrats to Ourstor08954957 for the lovely art in the end credits 🎉 such cute doodles ❤️

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

Oh boy, what an episode. I feel like I'm in another plane of existence right now. Everything was absolutely incredible, great job Team!!

Everyone, say THANK YOU to whoever put the SMG34 crumbs in there, we shall treasure it for the rest of our lives. I'm gonna put those moments on my fridge. OH I would love to see the artists draw the SMG34 hug or pirate Four!

Love the fighting scene right by the end and the little details they have added in there. I guess it's "Torture Ink with the Idea that Goop!4 May Happen" day but hey, I'm so normal about it (no I'm not). I've been a bit stressed since finals are coming up so I'm thankful for anything this episode for me.

(If anyone is curious, the WOTFI website is still up and yes, I am logging its status just in case.)

I'm sure everyone is going crazy over this...

"They gay fr :3" [BenJoJoGV, Twitter]

🧍

BEN YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THESE THINGS—

[wutheringmights]

After I finished reading The Epic of Gilgamesh today, I entered a fugue state where I sat down and read the entirety of Alanna: The First Adventure by Tamora Pierce.

On the record, I have had a lifelong love and adoration for Pierce's Tortall books. I first read the Song of the Lioness quartet when I was 11, and they rewrote my brain. I love them so much. I reread them and the other Tortall books on a semi-frequent schedule.

It's been a while since I reread any of the Alanna books, if only because my sister took our shared copies when she moved out. I've been meaning to buy my own set for a long while now but haven't been able to justify the purchase. The other week, I just so happened to find the first two volumes at my local indie bookstore. I bought them immediately, as well as ordered the third and fourth book. (And discovered that the store owner knows me by name-- when I went to pick up my order, she saw me and said, Hi Frankie! I got your books over here.) (I may be spending too much money there.)

So I have been in a bit of an emotional rut these past few weeks. Work sucks. Life stinks. The temptation to run off to Tortall and curl up in the fantasy story that captivated me as a kid has never been stronger.

Ergo, I ran off to read the first book as soon as I could.

If you're looking for any critique of this book, series, or Tortall in general, I will never give it. Sure, it's problematic and dated, and in many ways imperfect, but someone else can list out all of its issues. They're all perfect to me.

Anyway, the book. I should say something about this book in particular.

One thing I appreciate about Pierce's writing is how she handles school settings in fantasy. Learning and training is so mundane. All of her heroines have to work hard and put in extra hours of study in order to improve, much less keep up with their peers. It's so normal that it circles around to being weirdly refreshing.

Also, there is still no other fantasy author who handles period talk and birth control the way Pierce does. We make fun of the trope of fantasy birth control nowadays, but I rarely see it presented as it is here: as a part of normal puberty lessons and given long before sex is in the girl's radar. And even today with the glut of YA fantasy stories out there, I still have yet to see menstruation be portrayed as frequently or as bluntly as Pierce writes it.

There was a period of time publishers really tried to push the Tortall books as straight YA, which doesn't work for that reason alone. You gotta market them to middle schoolers. They're the ones just starting puberty talks, and getting scenes like this is so good for their brains.

Moving on: I fucking love these characters. Alanna was an icon of brash, temperamental heroines that have shaped my taste to this day. I love how even in the first book, Jon is kinda shitty. I adore George Cooper. Talk about a taste maker the way this man sets a standard.

I just can't be coherent when it comes to any Tortall books. I have no thoughts. Head empty. I am going to binge the rest of this series as quickly as I can before my library book comes in. Then normal book content will resume.

Before I go, I need to talk about the book covers.

Growing up, my sister and I had these covers:

Which, god. I love them. The black is striking. The art is incredible. Alanna looks so good. They were the perfect pocket-size too. I was going to buy the same edition for my copies, but instead I got the 40th anniversary reprints:

Not bad at all! These books have had some seriously bad covers, and these look great! Very anime, which will appeal to the 11 year olds who need to have their socks rocked by this series.

But, man. I really miss those black covers. One day I will splurge and buy a second set of them just so that I can stare at the art.

[rontra]

My hand never seems to actually translate the ideas that are spinning up in my brain. how do you get it all out? any advice? just draw more? do i need to use more references? your art is just so beatiful you are one of my top inspos.

ah first of all thank you very much! i'm honored! 😳

(long post incoming lol)

to answer the question though, i don't think i sufficiently translate what's in my mind and i frequently let myself down! but it's important not to let that Stop you. i think overall it's sort of multifaceted and different for everyone--theres no single answer i can give you that will guaranteed work for you--but for me personally i think it mainly comes down to Derangement, DISCRETION!!, Discipline, & Diet

before i say anything more though it's important also to remember that making visual art (in our case drawings/comics) is training like 2 or 3 separate skills (depending on how you divide them). the HAND represents your current drawing ability & technique; what your drawing hand is physically able to produce when you set pen to paper. the BRAIN is the creative engine that cooks up your ideas and thinks of ways to assemble them. and the EYE represents your ability to recognize what art looks like and how it "should" look. when your brain is thinking of ideas and your hand can't capture them, that is not because you're "bad" at it: it means your eye skill is currently outpacing your hand skill. your ability to discern art, to see things like proportions and anatomy and composition and whatever else is going on, is currently stronger than your ability to draw them yourself. this is not a flaw. this is not a flaw. this is not a flaw!!!! but it does mean your hands' ability to capture what your brain has imagined will let your eyes down until your hands catch up. once they do--by studying, practicing your technique, using references, and gaining confidence--your eye skill will then begin to outpace it again. this cycle, the dance between the two skills, is why you might sometimes feel yourself suddenly "getting good" at art, then just as suddenly plateauing or "getting worse"; you are training different parts of what makes art happen. there is nothing wrong with this. you are improving even when it doesnt feel like it--even when it feels like THE LITERAL OPPOSITE is happening. because you're improving different skills!

(and of course as your eye skill develops you will look back at previous stages of development and go "HOW COULD I NOT SEE HOW BAD THIS LOOKS!"--and yeah. that's the thing; you probably, rather literally, couldn't see it! you only think it looks bad now because you've improved your "eye" skill. you should try to be proud of that feeling, even though it also likely sucks and is embarrassing to you at the same time. there's posts, even recent ones, that i go "i cant believe i thought that looked OK enough to post PUBLICLY" and it is embarrassing for me! but all it means is that i'm better at what i do now...so it doesn't get me down too badly. you gotta shrug that stuff off.)

with that out of the way, my four evil councilmen are as follows:

DERANGEMENT: find something you are not normal about. this can be anything (whether it's a topic that interests you, The Character, a medium, a damn color palette...anything!), as long as it captures your mind and motivates you to create. your brain should be spinning up ideas like crazy and your only choice is to draw them. because once you have Derangement the only thing that feels worse than Making Something Subpar is sitting around Not Making Anything At All. you should be interested in what you draw. you should ideally love it, even if you don't love your own art yet. once you know what motivates you, let that simmer until you have no choice but to draw even if you're scared it'll turn out bad. and hey--there will probably (unless you become some kind of Art God) always be parts you think should've turned out better in some way, however:

DISCRETION!!: realistically nobody NEEDS to know what parts of a piece you're unhappy with. it's valuable to have friends/art partners/mentors/whatever that you can comfortably check in with and go "i dont like [part], what do you think" and get feedback, but that's for YOU. for the audience at large, maybe people will notice, maybe they won't, but as an artist you are constantly growing and you will very likely be constantly looking back at past pieces (even just days or hours old sometimes) and going "what the hell was i thinking? how did i not see [error/s], or why didn't i go for [different idea/finish/color palette/etc]?". getting hung up on this will probably either light a fire under you or demotivate you completely depending on your particular brain soup. for me it can go either way depending on where i'm at in my current hand/eye development phase. but i try not to fixate on it. it's enough to observe it and take notes for next time. every drawing is part of your growth and you have to make wonky art in order to occasionally make something that satisfies your eyes. in the meantime, don't beat yourself up or put yourself down. you are gaining experience and technical know-how, and spotting things you'd like to work on for next time; especially if you're sharing this work and other people are telling you they like what you made, there's no need to undercut this by dwelling on the rough parts so much that you can't enjoy it. the important thing is that you made it.

DISCIPLINE: you made it, it's done, now make something new. do it again from the top! you're right: Drawing A Lot is absolutely the key to Drawing Better. it is also usually an evil curse that reveals How Bad You Drew 3 Months Ago. but you have no choice, if you want to hone your skills and improve the Brain Image -> Art Image translation. you have to do it even when it sucks. do it bored, do it scared, but you have to do it or you'll never get anywhere. when improving yourself, you have to draw a lot to see change, and this is the part that sucks, right? feeling like you're not really getting anywhere or like you'll never capture what's in your mind. you can do studies where you collect references and focus in on ironing out something that's bothering you (such as, like, specific objects, perspectives, clothing details, anatomy pieces, light and shadow, etc etc); this can help crack the malaise for sure... learning how to use references is good, as well as whatever tools are available to you (in your medium/software). How To Do This is sort of a different post, but it does help (and sometimes annoyingly so; there's been rare but very annoying moments in my career where i will be simply looking at a picture and idly make an observation that cracks a style/anatomy problem i've had for Years and im always like COME ON!!! hahaha--but yes looking at references and studying them "like an artist" definitely helps, even when it's not as miraculous as that). overall work smarter and nail down the stuff you're unsure about, then incorporate what you've learned into your art style until it looks a way you like. you will likely have to just grind it out sometimes, and often this grind will not feel particularly fun. but you can Dog Medication Salami Pocket yourself into it if you're drawing something you're sufficiently Deranged about. <- this is what diesel is always doing with those women (LOL)

also, Output. you do have to Be Making Stuff in order to finish stuff. for example for comic projects like adastra or failteacher au, if i can draw ~1 page a day, the update will be complete in no time. but i have to draw that 1 page every day to make it happen, even if i feel off or lack confidence about what i'm making. of course i'm not saying you shouldn't take breaks; you NEED to take breaks, set your goals to your own level, and listen to yourself (and don't get some kind of wrist problem like me please). but the point im trying to make is that if you can make yourself sit down and do it even though you're scared it'll turn out bad, (or, hell, even if this part of your project is Simply Boring), then you can do it anytime. this is important too. but you will probably still sometimes feel stuck if you try to work and grind all the time.

DIET: regularly, but especially when you're stuck in a rut, step away from your craft and enrich your diet. you have to play just as much as you have to work. for example, i am always ALWAYS reading comics. at any given time i probably have 1-4 (sometimes more) tabs open of different comics i am simultaneously reading!!!! i read webcomics, webtoons, manga, DC--any demographic or genre, i take random recs from people and just go read them. whatever medium you're in, you have to take in what other people are doing with it, you have to let them teach and inspire you. you have to branch out and look at genres and styles you usually don't. unwind and look at comics, at illustrations, at design, at animation, at video games. enjoy them as an audience, but look at them like an artist too. when you like something, pause and examine (as both an artist and audience) why you like it. (vice versa: if you don't like something, you can try to figure out why that is!) let other people's ideas and habits flow over you. you have to relax and enrich your mind, to refresh your creativity and motivation. this is crucial. when you come back, you'll feel refreshed and ready to go, and your big brain cauldron of tools + ideas + techniques will be all shiny and bubbling. it's just as important to experience art as it is to make it. i really can't stress that enough!!!!

i talk about comics specifically here because right now obviously i am making a lot of comics (adastra, failteachers). i often feel like i get stuck in boring page layouts and can't think of how to panel something. and honestly sometimes a basic layout that just Gets Through The Scene is simply sufficient (after all, not everything has to be a Groundbreaking New Masterpiece; we would all get fatigued by that!)--or otherwise a "boring layout" is just what i have to put down in order to put down anything at all. but in both cases, reading comics and taking in what people are doing with their layouts makes me feel refreshed and i can return to my own work all rested and bright-eyed. everything we read and watch and take in is added to our "mental library" for the brain to reference when it's time to create something. it is just as enriching and important to experience someone else's art and perspective, and to enjoy a diverse range of impressions. you are always learning and observing, so try to pay attention--it's feeding your brain... :j

(and now, hopefully, your enriched Diet has added fertilizer for your Derangement, and the entire council can take their turn again from the top of the order. HDFHBJFS)

hmm...

well, overall, like i said at the top, there's no One Solution or really Single Piece Of Advice i can offer you. but i hope maybe you got something out of it anyway. everyone's a bit different and everyone's ideal workflow and journey is different too. but don't give up, keep at it, and...GOOD LUCK!!! 🫡🫡🫡

& always remember: in the end, making something YOU like, that looks good to YOU and fulfills YOUR goals, is more important than making something "perfect" (if such a thing even exists). as long as YOU'RE enjoying making your art (yes, even when making the art is hell and sucks!), that's all that matters. 🤝

[asirensrage]

The Road to Hell

Title: The Road to Hell Fandom: Tokyo Revengers Rating: Explicit Pairing: Sanzu Haruchiyo x Unnamed!Undescribed!FemaleOC Word count: 2306 Warnings: Dark!fic. Dub-con. Drug overdose. Non-con drug use. Obsession. Forced Relationship. Sex. Coercion. Forced Relationship. Unbeta'd. *warnings are not exhaustive* Summary: It's pure luck that she stumbles across him alone in the middle of an overdose. He thinks it's fate.

MANGA SPOILER WARNING! This fic mentions events in the manga that have not yet been shown in the anime. You have been warned.

Notes: okay, I don't completely love how this came out with the pov change, but I can't figure out how to improve it yet. If I do, I'll rewrite/repost it like I dd the Ran oneshot. It is a dark fic. Consider yourself warned. It was inspired by my mother talking about kids accidentally overdosing in parks and how I should pick up one of these kits. The POV change shifts in the middle and there's a bit of timeshifting in it, but I hope it makes sense. (please tell me if it doesn't so i can fix it. I've looked at it too much myself and I don't have a beta for my TR fics) I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know what you think.

“Ha–Haru–” she tries to say his name, unable to catch her breath from the way he’s thrusting into her. 

“Yeah, baby?” he asks, grinning down at her. 

Her arms are tied above her, making her arch her chest up towards him a little more. She’s so fucking pretty like this, tears in her eyes as she begs him for more. He leans down and kisses her, letting her taste the remnants of herself on his tongue. 

God, he wants more. 

He didn’t think there was ever a woman who would drive him to madness, but here he has her under him. His angel. His fucking saviour who’s too good for him but Sanzu doesn’t give a shit. Tasting her is better than any of the drugs he’s been on. She makes him fucking crazy.

“Come on, baby. Lemme see you come for me again.” 

She whines, shifting as though she can resist him. He knows better. He leans down, kissing her neck as he adjusts the angle of her hips. She feels so fucking good. If he hadn’t looked into her, researched everything about her, he’d think she was a virgin with the way she was squeezing him this tight. 

She cries out as he picks up his pace and it’s music to his ears. 

“Fuck!” he groans against her skin, kissing her hard again. “Gotta come for me, baby. Come with me. Show me how fucking pretty you look.”

Her eyes are closed, lost in the feeling of him. She’s fucking glowing with sweat from how long they’ve been fucking. “Open your eyes, baby. Look at me.” When she doesn’t move fast enough, lost in how good he’s making her feel, he grabs her neck forcing her attention back on his face. “Look at me.”

Her eyes open, glaring at him for the distraction. As if he’s going to deny her the pleasure only he can bring.

He grins at her. “There’s my angel.” 

🩹

Some time ago…

He doesn’t mean to do it. He doesn’t. It’s not like he takes more than he usually does. He’s slipped something by one of his usual suppliers but something is wrong. He knows something is wrong and he’s trying to get some air, shoving his way outside as he grabs his phone to call someone for help and he drops. The world is spinning around him and he laughs. He can’t move. 

“Hey, are you okay? Hey, look–” 

A face appears over him but he can’t make out the features. Things are blurring. They’re saying something else but he can’t make it out. He calls for Mikey, reaching for his phone but his vision goes black and he passes out. 

🩹

Being sober fucking sucks. 

It makes him more irritable than normal. He wants to succumb to the feeling of weightlessness, of drifting away from the world just enough that he can actually do his work. But since he was fucking poisoned and nearly died because of the pills, Mikey’s ordered him off of them. Even if he already killed the dealer who gave it to him. 

He’s fiddling with one of the pens that he stole from the purse of the girl who saved him. At least, that’s what he had been told. Whatever she gave him kept him alive long enough for the doctor they have on staff to drag him back from the edge. 

He doesn’t remember more than the sound of her panicked voice and the way the light in the alley acted like a halo framing her head. He’s seen her license, but photos never really do someone justice. He just wants to know…why did she save him?

He tries to shove it out of his mind. He doesn’t have time to wonder about a stranger, not when he has traitors to dig out and Mikey to protect. He’s number two, after all. He has work to do. 

🩹

He can’t stop fucking thinking about her. Why did she save him? Why him? Of all the people he could have stumbled across…it was the one woman probably in the whole country who didn’t fear him, who had something in her bag that kept him alive. 

He’s always felt justified in his choices, in his decisions to follow Mikey. He was certain he wouldn’t let that old timeline come to pass, he’d do what Shinchiro set out to do and keep Mikey alive. But her? She was like an angel in his time of need…the thought stops him. 

He didn’t believe in religious junk, but something brought Shinchiro back, something saved Mikey…and something sent this woman into his path. Maybe there was more to it than just saving him…maybe it was Shinchiro sending his thanks for looking after Mikey. He snorts at the idea but the more he ruminates on it, the more it makes sense. Clearly, she’s meant for him. Otherwise, why would she have saved him? Why would she have been there?

🩹 🩹 🩹

Honestly, it’s a lot of luck on his part that she happened to be walking by. She doesn’t usually like to get involved in the affairs of strangers, but it’s easy to see with one look at him that he’s blissed out. Until he falls and she can see the way his breathing catches, the way he’s struggling. 

When he drops, she’s moving without thinking. She kneels, praying he doesn’t throw up on her and calls out to him. 

“Hey! Are you okay? Hey! Look at me!” His eyes can’t focus, pupils nearly erasing the irises. 

“Mik–” his voice slurs and he passes out in front of her. At first, she’s just going to turn him over to make sure if he does throw up, he won’t choke. Then he fully stops breathing. 

He’s lucky because she’s trained in first aid. Because her mother had been watching the news about children accidentally overdosing on drugs somehow left on playgrounds and strongly recommended that she carry the drug meant to help keep someone alive if they overdose on her person. So she digs it out of her bag, yelling for help as she unzips the pack and shoves the first one into one of his nostrils and presses it. She calls 911 and puts it on speaker since no one is coming to help and starts CPR. 

She talks to the operator, trying to tell them where she is but she’s not from this district and she’s trying to get this man to start breathing. She pauses and instead of putting her mouth against his, she shoves the second dose of it into his other nostril and sprays it in. 

He coughs and throws up. She jolts back, turning him towards her so that he can get it out and not choke. The operator is asking her what’s happening but he’s finally breathing that it takes her attention until she has him in a recovery position. 

She grabs her phone but before she can actually confirm that he’s alive and ask where the ambulance is, someone knocks it out of her hand. She looks to get it but someone steps on it, fully shattering the screen and making it go black. 

“HEY!”

The click of a gun, the cool metal touching her temple stops her from reaming them out. 

“What the fuck did you do to him?”

“Saved his life!” she snaps back. “He needs a hospital and you just broke my call that the operator was probably tracking!” 

“What’s this shit?” another voice asks and she sees a foot kick the pack that the naloxone was in. 

“It’s Naloxone. When used fast enough, it can save someone from overdosing. Now instead of interrogating me, call an ambulance!”

They refuse, instead dragging the man off and leaving her in the alley, covered in his sick after they threaten her if she says anything to anyone. It’s not until she’s home and locked out that she realizes that they took her purse. 

It all goes to shit after that. 

🩹

It all goes to shit after that. 

Getting all of her IDs, cards and papers replaced takes longer than she wants. She does, however, tell her mother that she was right and she did help someone. Even if it wasn’t a child like her mother feared. Honestly, she didn’t know where her mother thought they lived but it was clearly somewhere more dangerous than they did. 

She expected that to be the worst of it. 

Until she runs into him by accident. 

She’s leaving a convenience store and putting her wallet away when she accidentally stumbles into him. He grabs her by the shoulders, steadying her. She looks up, an apology on her lips when she realizes who it is. 

“Oh my god, you’re alive!” 

He looks a little startled at her reaction before he smiles. “It’s you.”

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you again. I didn’t think you made it,” she admits before remembering the rest of the night. “You stole my purse.” 

“Me? I was dying,” he says clearly. “I couldn’t have.” 

“Your friends then,” she replies. Now that he’s alive and seemingly healthy, she can finally stop thinking about the incident. 

“Let me make it up to you.” He stares down at her and she shifts under the sudden intensity of his gaze. His pink hair falls to his shoulders and his suit looks finely pressed. The scars on the edge of his mouth make him look intimidating. It’s a huge change from the last time she saw him. 

“You don’t need to,” she says. She doesn’t need to get involved with anyone who overdoses and has friends ready to murder her in retribution for causing his death. “I appreciate the offer but it’s fine. I’m just glad I could help.”

He steps forward. “You did. They said I wouldn’t have made it without you. Come on,” he grins at her. “I want to say thank you.”

“You just did,” she points out.

“Properly.”

🩹

She doesn’t think much of it at first. 

Sanzu Haruchiyo, as he properly introduced himself as, is persistent in his determination to say thank you. She expects dinner and refused, not wanting to get more involved with the man than she already was. 

He sends her flowers with a card that holds a number. When she doesn’t call it, choosing to dispose of it instead, her work receives an anonymous donation for upgrades and her class is the first chosen. She refuses the upgrades but then her vacation days are suddenly increased. He pays her rent for the next six months. 

It’s enough to make her track him down so she can get him to stop. She knows the feeling of a gun against her head because of him. She doesn’t want anything else. 

It’s not an easy thing, but she tracks him down to a club. In the process, she learns the name of the criminal organization he’s involved with: Bonten. It’s enough to make her second guess finding him, the criminals more serious than she ever anticipated. She watches the news. She knows the reports of just what they do and how often bodies are found with them as the main suspects. 

It makes her more determined to find him, to get him to stop. It leads to her eventually arguing with the bouncer of the VIP area of the club she waited in line for over an hour to get in. She just wants this to be over. 

She doesn’t know when he spots her, but he approaches with a grin, waving off the guard and leaning in towards her. His pink hair falls between them, brushing her bare shoulders. She’s forced herself into a borrowed skimpy dress to get into this club but she’s more uncomfortable now with him so close. 

“What have I done to earn seeing your face again, angel?”

He doesn’t look high but she doesn’t have enough experience with drugs to confirm it. 

“Why did you pay my rent? Or send that donation to my work. That was you, wasn’t it?” 

He reaches out, brushing her hair back out of her face. “You never called. Wouldn’t let me take you to dinner.”

“And that’s your response?” She stares at him incredulously. It was more than a little overkill. 

He grins at her. “Let me make it up to you?” he asks again, almost a parody of the last time. She stares at him for a long moment. If she says no, there’s no telling what else he’ll do. So she accepts.

🩹

Sanzu keeps her. 

It was an accident, pure chance that she saved him, and he has not let her forget it since. Her attempts to tell him no fail every time. He slowly takes over her life and any attempts to make him stop has him increasing his actions until there’s nothing left except him. 

She gave one small thing. He takes everything in return. 

Every attempt she makes at pulling away has him digging himself deeper under her skin. Before she knows it, there’s a bodyguard outside her work. He moves her into his apartment with claims that it’s safer for her. He breaks down every protest, every action, with cool logic, soft touches and warm promises. He distracts her with orgasms and pretty trinkets, burying her until the only things she has are reminders of him. 

And now they’re here.

🩹

He’s slipped her something. 

“Just to help you relax, baby. Let me lead you back to heaven,” he says, murmuring it into her skin. It makes her head spin. 

“Haru…” She breathes before he kisses her. It’s not the first time they’ve kissed, not the first time they’ve tasted each other, but it feels ten times more intense than before. 

“I got you.” 

He whispers promises into her skin. He brings her to her peak with ease, content in devouring her bit by bit until all she can say is his name. He’s breaking her apart every time she cums under his mouth or fingers or cock.

If she wasn’t bound, stars in her eyes and lost in the feelings he was creating, she’d kill him for this. He’d probably enjoy the attempt, tell her it’s more proof they’re meant to be. If she could feel anything except the constant ebb and flow of pleasure, lighting coursing down her spine, she’d–

“Come on, baby. Lemme see you come for me again.” 

She whines, trying to shift away because it’s too much. She’s overstimulated to the point she feels like crying. He kisses her neck, forcing another mark into her skin and adjusts them until she can barely speak from the way it feels. 

 He kisses her again and she can taste herself on his tongue. “Gotta come for me, baby. Come with me. Show me how fucking pretty you look.”

Her eyes are closed because she can barely keep them open, because she doesn’t want to look at the man who’s stolen her life. 

“Open your eyes, baby. Look at me.” She doesn’t want to, but his hand moves to her throat and she feels the pressure he puts as he forces her to face him. “Look at me.”

She glares at him, eyes brimming with tears and anger at the way he won’t let her escape even just as far as the distance of an eyelid. 

He grins at her. “There’s my angel.” 

She’ll give him this. Let him grow comfortable enough that she has space to make her move. She’ll be free of him. One way or another. 

taglist: @raith-way @zeleniafic @veetlegeuse @chickensarentcheap @residentdormouse @themaradwrites @kingsmakers @far-shores

[g0g0at]

Malevolent part 47

Oooh let’s go

What is that sound???

Thank you for the exact hours Yorick, I’ll be putting that to good use

Oh one of those medieval prison things.

A gibbot? Joyous name mmm

Are we about to get a sick fic esc episode?

Arthur talking about the air again… he’s been doing that a lot this season…

John shaking Arthur “REST GODDAMNIT!!

Bro straight up has the plague

“If Arthur says he’s fine, he’s fine” NO THAT IS NOT TRUE FOR HIM

John is being so understanding

John pep talk

“He was just a man” he also SUCKED

Arthur you’re not a bad person for this my guy

Probably would be dead otherwise ngl

“I don’t have an answer that will make you feel better”

John is already human

I mean you can try but the plague is contagious

“You know what the right path forward is” I mean mostly

“Thanks you keeping us alive” part 2

Hehe John bragging a little

Oh witches hand?

Welp. Time to desecrate a corpse

ARTHUR SHOULD NOT CLIMB HIGH PLACES!! NOT WITH HIS FALLING OFF OF THINGD HISTORY!!

Yorick you’re being sneaky…

Why did I know he was gonna say eye?

Eye gouging time again 😔

Hand of Malevolen(t)ce

“I am in no rush” ok Yorick thanks

Is he seriously climbing this

Couldn’t he tip it?

The laughing cough BAHAHHA

“There are no wrong answers in brain storming” sounds like my highschool teachers

Shame he doesn’t have an axe

How are you gonna get the pin? Shake it?

John has had enough of being dead named

Haha! Rocks!

How good is your aim?

Hey he hit it! John sounds so proud

Wii Golf

Alexander heyo

Alexander please don’t eat the eyes

ALEXANDER STOP THAT!

“I scared him away 😞 “

Is Alexander actively against Yorick?

Bro is calling himself a nerd 💀

For someone “not good at athletics” he’s good and running a such

“You wanted to fit in” HEY HEY HEY

“If they could see me now” *throws rocks at a corpse*

WHAT WAS THAT

Was that John tapping the cage to guide him? That’s a new trick

Mist creature

Oh no split decision

And another hole!

RIGHT NOW?!! WHY NOW?!!

YORICK PRIORITIES PLEASE

Oh dear

This is not good

Arthur you are “folding” again

Black candle?

Dark magic…

Oh dear dark world shit

What is happening

Did it get rid of the creature?

Oh the vanguard and yorick are seperate?

Hmmm

Interesting…

Hey he called him John

Yorick lore

I thought the antithesis was gonna be “the hand of god” ngl

Oh that’s actually useful af

Haha it was the owl!

Lilith? Sent by Kayne maybe?

Oh ok nvm

Arthur is just getting chased by every second outer god oml

Shape shifters…

Maybe Arthur needed to die for whatever reason

Who is she…

Limited uses AUGHHHHH

SCRATCH

Is John hearing those whispers?

Oh dear

Ok ok so. Alexander is or works for Scratch. But if Arthur is her “favourite”. Then…

Mmmm maybe Arthur NEEDED to die and come back, for some reason

Oooh this episode has so much lore

Can you bluff a god like that??

Maybe don’t confront her…

Double lie

I mean you guys are both ok at lying

Arthur is struggling

Oooh ok it’s starting to make sense

So you only gotta worry about her if she’s nearby that’s some benefit

John and Yorick bonding moment?

John saying he’s projecting and that he thought Yorick was a mistake… does that mean… does that mean John thinks that he’s also a mistake?

“Purely for appearances” yeah ok

Very poetic, my friend

Looks like we’re ramping up to the final season(s)

“We’ll stare it down” well… John will

Yeah play it up! Arthur’s acting skills have improved since the train

John is getting excited too BAHHAHA

How close are you guys to the castle?

Oh they’ve all be cut down hmmmm

Mmmm storm environment

King Louis?

Was there an 8th Louis?

So we’re in a different timeline

That’s a LONG reign

King John hehhe

France and England become one country??

Oooooh world building

AYE CASTLE!!

Eeee I’m excited

Hopefully it’s not full of dead people like in Carcosa

“I know far too much, you will need to be more specific”

That’s a big question

He needs some cough drops

He sounds like he’s gonna pass out kinda

King in Yellow has some French influence, this’ll be interesting

Oh my god he needs some soup and cough drops

Yorick sounded kinda concerned for him there dang

Yeah probably better to rest in the castle than the rain

Cows might be difficult to fake

That cough sounds real (if Harlan recorded this while sick I guess it would be)

Gold ring, good choice

Lovely description from John

Oh is this castle fucked up

Good lord that is a horrid cough

Everart… that sounds familiar… oh that’s a disco elysium character

Oh my god he literally sounds like he’s dying

“Not the way you taught me”

He is mixed up HE HAS THE PLAGUE

“Lean on me” I thought he meant literally for a second ngl and was like “well good luck with that”

Let John handle it for a bit

Castle time!!!

Oh the sound design….

Is Yorick in the bag??? Doesn’t matter if he’s quiet if they can SEE HIM

Oh this sound design is AWESOME

Don’t get stabbed…

Oh WHAT

Of course the castle is fucked up why am I surprised

How does he eat? Does he? Fucked up castle

This imagery is nice

Maaaaaaaaan maybe this castle was a bad choice

AH CARCOSA MENTION

All righty castle time!!

Mmmm I’m nervous tho ngl

Oooh can’t wait for next week!! The castle!!

[etherealspacejelly]

whats it like being a grownup??

honestly? its been a blast so far!

once i turned 18 the first things i did were change my name legally and get myself on the wait list for gender services. its been 2 years now and every day i am a step closer!

i had a job for a while and made hella money and was able to buy a bunch of cool stuff that i wanted and i still have a bunch of it left over that i am saving to get top surgery

i moved out of my mums house! that has been Unreal in improving my mental health. i had no idea how much living with my parents was getting me down until i was out of there. i am now in full control of my time, my body, and my space.

a strange side effect is that teenagers seem so Young now. when you are 14 you feel so grown up and you think you look and act like an adult but then suddenly you are 20 and looking at all the 14 year olds like My God These Are Children. but like. not in a "you shouldnt have autonomy and i dont respect you" way, more like "why is no one protecting you from The Horrors??? why is no one loving you and supporting you and telling you you're doing great??? why would anyone be mean to these kids!!"

and just because you're an adult doesn't mean you have to grow up lol. i still sleep with plushies in my bed and have fnaf posters up on my walls. just because you have to do your own food shopping and laundry doesnt mean you cant also play in the park with your friends.

you have so much life ahead of you. it doesnt end when you turn 18. yeah some stuff sucks but some stuff Always sucks thats life under capitalism babey! you gotta find the little joys. remind yourself of how far you've come and how much better things are. being a grown up is about freedom. its about autonomy. its about being In Control. and yeah that means you gotta keep your flesh prison alive and clean but it also means you get to spend your time however you want! and thats awesome

and it also means you get to look out for the kids the way you wish grown ups would have looked out for you. :)

[tempkiriri]

Tiger & Bunny Week (Day 1)

Technically I'm late but uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

April 2: Favorite Character, Episode, Movie, and/or Song

Most people seem to be doing them all, but I'll be skipping movie since there's only 2 of them.

Favourite Character:

MY CRINGEFAIL SON IVAN!!!! I relate to him immensely, even his dynamic with Edward I'd say I can somewhat relate to with someone in my life. It's uncanny. He tries his best to be outgoing but anxiety and self esteem issues sure are fucking bitches, so he can only really do it behind a mask. Even in S2 whilst his whole outlook may have taken a bit of a rollback, that's honestly realistic, not everyone can just keep marching and continuously improving themselves, there are setbacks and holes you can fall into at times. I wish we knew more about his personal life beyond his backstory of getting bullied as a child + what vague stuff we have of his hero academy days, a lot of heroes suffer from this, however. His passion for his hobbies is also just like me. He's cringe but he is free, just like many of us wish to be. Runner up is Keith I love the Autistic dog man

Favourite Episode:

I gotta go with Sky's The Limit. The title is a very OH GEE WHOS FOCUS EPISODE IS THIS kind but genuinely it doesn't prepare you for the content. There's a wholeass lore drop, an intense fight scene with a robot, and of course Keith being Keith. It also puts into focus just how much pressure heroes are put under when it comes to the rankings, and second place apparently not being enough for Poseidon Line is a very corporate reality. It's go big or go home. The ending is also like OH MY GOD IM CRYING???? Like, we know Cis isn't very capable of behaving like a human, but Keith doesn't realise she's not human at all, he treats her as any other person and falls harder than an anvil for her despite their short time in contact. It makes me think that Cis had a potential to be something, someone more than she was initially made for. And these two are a bit of a guilty pleasure ship that me and like 2 other people in the west side seem to ship and yes I will be taking those "Keith is still lowkey in love with her even in S2 era" crumbs thank you-

Favourite Song:

Oh shit this is where it gets tricky. I have so many, so I'll split it into categories:

OP: Earth Diver ED: Pilot Character Song: GHHHAAAAAA DONT MAKE ME CHOOOOOSE Other supplementary Song: Orion Wo Nazoru Hero Cover

I can't really put to words for Earth Diver, but I really like how it starts and kinda soothes you into the song before it really kicks. The lyrics are also very passionately sung.

I really like the calmer tone of Pilot and even though the explicitness of the shippyness isn't as heavy as Aida, the subtlety honestly fits them more. The credits themselves are also just beautiful; the visual aspect of them hits immensely hard in ep 14 especially since you saw what could happen to their suits in the fight the episode prior, and they're both no longer in their prime. Closing it out as they stare at the sunset makes me emotional and Proud Fiesta I love you but goddamn why did you return for Episode 25 that was a fucking mood killer I stg.

I love a lot of the character songs, with the ones from Best Of Hero very enjoyable romps, especially Mikirezakura and Thanks and Thanks Again, the energy these two songs have makes you wanna coreograph something. Some other highlights are POWER OF JUSTICE and Aaa Hero Suit. (Also Hidden Heroism actually kinda sucks it tries to be Mikirezakura 2 and thus loses out on an identity of its own which is very disappointing).

I love the harmony of the heroes cover of Orion, I can really picture them all in recording booths singing next to each other...who's the cheering guy, though? I've listened to this cover so many times and the line the cheering guy seemingly sings just sounds like Hirata's Kotetsu, I don't get it. I get wanting to balance the lyrics between groups and characters evenly but that was an awkward way to do it.

[savefrog]

Hi! I shouldn't assume that being a longtime follower means I know you but I gotta unfollow anyone engaging in "vote blue no matter who" rhetoric and figured I'd say so on my way out. You have every right to do whatever w electoral politics and I agree there's a level of pragmatism to voting. But like, are you saying that about the USA Dems?? They're bombing Gaza to the point of genocide as we speak! Even if you're not proud of that fact, what would be the aim of such a vote? I doubt anyone of any party committing war crimes can be pushed by freely given votes, no?

You're welcome to unfollow. But essentially I'm entirely on the pragmatism end here.

Me saying vote blue in this case is not going "woohoo ok dems i love everything you do, do whatever!!!!"

it's a matter of "red quite LITERALLY wants to remove all ability to protest and say this shit is wrong".

see summary of Trump on shutting down the ability to protest

blue is not entirely clean on this matter either but i would take getting run over by a motorbike over getting run over by a truck.

I would like to preserve the ability to say the government sucks ass and while I totally get where people are coming from when they don't want to vote dem...I'd say that abstaining from voting to "send a message" is akin to complete silence in this current election climate especially considering the stakes, and there are a lot of other ways to get a message across that isn't passively allowing the literal white supremacist in - who by the way said BIDEN of all people was too soft on Palestine and that he wanted Israel to hurry up and "finish the job":

source (It is also recorded on various other news sources)

Though frankly I agree with this quote here, from an article that is also critical of Harris and Biden:

“Trump would be the worst,” Asmaa Nimilaat, 50, said from a hospital where thousands of people are sheltering in Deir el-Balah, an area in central Gaza. “But any candidate that becomes president will not support Palestinians.”

The USA as an entire machine is so heavily invested in Israel it's hard to imagine a pro-palestinian president ever being elected. That is why I said the election is "picking your opponent".

The ideal situation is a complete rework of the US. As much as not voting FEELS like protest here...it is not going to do anything meaningful in this regard. It is indistinguishable from a non-vote from someone who couldn't get off work or was screwed out of an accessible voting location by red bullshit or just skipped out of apathy.

But we can at least not let the guy in whose ideal is to restructure the government to only allow fascist kiss ups in, heavily criminalize any opposing voices and militarize against them, has already set a new standard to allow the executive branch to do "What the fuck crime ever", and continue to use poc and lgbt in the US as a scapegoat and target of violence to radicalize his people. And then CONTINUE to protest and make pressure.

By all means I'd say no matter someone's plans for the actual voting day, TELL democractic nominees you're undecided and will not vote if they don't call for a ceasefire that lasts more than 10 minutes.

You can do whatever, but im personally not interested in a situation I see as letting conservatives take what is already bad and making it 3000 times worse and 80x less improvable and I guess I would encourage others if they can stomach it to make that same consideration rather than treat the election like a moral pageant. If they truly believe not voting will actually send a message, cool. But I want people to think really hard on whether it will. And then for the love of god don't stop at just voting.

If anything I encourage people to vote dem in state elections if only because there are dems right now trying to make ranked voting a thing, so that we can finally be free from having to vote dem at all and actually make it viable to pressure them in ballots!!!!

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

I'm so tired. I feel like my whole life I've been fighting to have a healthy relationship with food and my body, and I just can't do it anymore. I can't fight anymore. And it's so, so easy in comparison to restrict and obsess over tracking everything I eat

I'm dealing with symptoms of a currently unknown disability right now, and I'm so tired. I'm tired of doctors saying "wow, I have no idea what's going on, I've never seen labs like this... but I'm sure losing weight will help!" (Or, worse, "looks like everything's fine, just lose some weight!") It's become this belief that if I was skinny my symptoms would be taken seriously. If I was skinny I'd be able to figure out what was going wrong because doctors wouldn't rely on my weight to explain everything. I know logically there are lots of disabled people who are still ignored while being skinny, who still struggle to be taken seriously, but I can't shake this feeling that everything would be easier if I was skinny

It feels like my life is in the hands of people who don't give a shit about me. And they still probably wouldn't give a shit if I was skinny, but maybe they would. I don't know, I've never been skinny, so I can imagine that everything would be perfect if I was

It's definitely at least partially a desire to have control over my body, too. I can't stop my symptoms, I don't have the tools to figure out what's wrong on my own, but I can starve myself! It seems very silly written out, and it is, but knowing it's silly isn't enough

I saw in your about that you've dealt with comorbid chronic illness and eating disorders, so I guess I'm asking... how? That's probably already on your blog somewhere, actually, so I guess I'm just venting more than anything. Advice would be appreciated, though

God, I feel this so hard, anon. So so hard.

First of all, I am so sorry I have taken so long to get to this ask. Work, ny studies, and my personal life have all been overwhelming lately and I’ve been having to focus on some wellness work for myself.

But yeah. What you’re talking about is a REAL problem, and you are not alone. And the constant medical neglect of fat people and the “I’m sure all your mystery symptoms will go away if you just lose weight” is just the cherry on top of the shit sundae that is chronic illness. It hurts peoples’ lives. It can kill. I don’t have a quick fix for this system, anon, but I just wanted to take a moment to validate you because I know that what you’re going through is so frustrating and draining and soul-sucking. I am mentally sending you strength.

First of all, I might have one suggestion for you: lie. Lie to your medical professionals about just one thing, and no other: tell them you are already on a weight-loss journey, even if you are not. If it gets you the help you need in this system - yeah, fib a little. But then, explain to your doctors that the reason you are seeking treatment for your symptoms so proactively is that they are preventing you from doing what you need to do to lose weight. Yes, of course you really want treatment to improve your basic quality of life, but when you’re talking to your doctor, sometimes you gotta frame it in a way they’ll hear. Explain how each symptom has made you unable to pursue an active lifestyle. Or how you’ve been too fatigued to meal prep, or how your symptoms are costing you so much that you are struggling to budget for dietary changes. You don’t have to actually be planning any of these things, but if it gets them to continue pursuing the source of your symptoms, just lie. I know it’s so triggering and awful to have to do this just to get taken seriously, so set aside time to prioritize something that you find self-caring after this.)

I know you say your desire to control your body seems silly written out, but it’s not silly at all. I get it. I really really do because I have the same impulse. When your body keeps acting out of your control in painful ways, it’ll make you desperate. And when you’ve had the message pushed your whole life that being skinny fixes everything, it tends to stick in your mind. You are not alone. You are desperate and being driven by a valid impulse.

Instead of pursuing an eating disorder, remind yourself that eating disorders only give you the illusion of control. Eating disorders only pave the way for the disorder to get more control over you. Not to mention, starving yourself will likely take even more of a toll on your health, doing lasting damage if you lose a significant amount of weight from starving. You are allowed to love yourself more than that. I know it’s hard. I know it’s hard to keep fighting for yourself.

Are you in any chronic illness support groups, online or in person? If you aren’t, I suggest you find some. You may find a good outlet to vent about symptoms, get advice on what got doctors to take other people seriously, and learn more about your own symptoms.

While I don’t recommend starving yourself, you could try tracking your symptoms in relation to certain foods and see if specific food sensitivities worsened them (this was true for me.) For me personally, it helps to remind myself that these foods aren’t “bad” foods - they’re just not good FOR ME, and choosing the ones that make me feel better is a way of taking care of and loving my body. (If you find your symptoms do not change based on dietary experimentation, you can disregard this advice.) For me, it can be really triggering having to avoid certain foods, so I definitely have to take a pause to calm down and talk myself through it sometimes.

Things like meditation exercises, gentle yoga, de-stressing exercises and therapy will not cure your chronic health condition, but may help keep symptoms from spiking as badly because stress is known to exacerbate physical symptoms. (Easier said than done, I know - what you’re going through is stressful. I am not telling you not to feel stressed, just to try and create small pockets of time where you try to give yourself a break from stress, which may not come naturally and may be hard because you cannot go to a place of escaping your symptoms. Just keep trying patiently and be compassionate with yourself.)

Anon, I really really hope this gives you some sort of help and comfort, even though it’s not a cure-all and I did get to it so late. There’s more I could say based on knowing specific symptoms if you’re okay sharing them, but for now I’ll just leave it at this. Feel free to vent in my inbox any time.

[gottfrieds]

Not to be obvious, but Aglovale for the character meme. I like hearing your thoughts on him

First impression: "is this guy any good?" b/c I pulled his gacha unit before I got to Frost and Flames. I tweeted this sentiment and got a "he sucked but kinda improved" from one friend and "PERCIVAL'S SHITTY BROTHER" from Lio which was confusing to say the least

I also did his first fate ep so I was like. okay so I'm getting the vibes he fucked up but is trying to be better. love that. I can feel fine putting him on my water team

Impression now: he's everything ♡

okay but to be serious I think he is one of gbf's well-written characters in his progression, backstory, actions. I love that they have a very real portrayal of grief in him, the ways it eats at you when left unhealed, the affects the fear of everyone around you would have on the psyche and how he is still unlearning some of that. how atonement is a process that doesn't just end after one big gesture, how improvement both in statecraft and in personhood is sometimes difficult and imperfect. and in all that they also managed to make it so clear that he's a doting elder brother, and also ALSO that he's definitely got some parentification to him (I swear I'm not just projecting). even small details like how his pledges in light Percy fate are the elements that ultimately lead to Herzeloyde’s death, or even how his very very funny and cute gap moe about things says so much about how isolated he became growing up. they packed SO much into this fucking guy I go insane.

Favorite moment: VERY HARD OH MY GOD but man did he truly shine to In Each His Ideal. idc that we got cheaply thrown an excuse for Grand Percy in that one, that event belonged to Aglovale and Lamorak. and while there's SO much I could say in there alone, like the moment he willingly cuts through the visages of their parents because he accepts that death cannot just be undone, even though he almost unleashed hell to try it himself like a year prior,

it's actually after that, when he finds Lamorak.

I love the display of both sheer intelligence and the clear show of love and attention in how Aglovale put together, having never even seen Lusor before, that it was Lam. because he cares and he's always been looking after his little brothers and so he remembers. and when he corners wounded Lam as Lusor he's poised like he's ready for conflict, because he is. he is cold and commanding and ready and it all snaps in a SECOND the moment he realizes his brother is hurt.

it's the way he is at Lamorak's side in a second, all the indiscretions gone from his mind because it is happening again and it cannot, he's just found the last remaining member of his family again, so he cannot die here. and he won't! it's how for all his insistence on taking the harsh road, as always, the love shines through, because he's promising everything will be okay and they'll keep him safe in Wales and they can all be together again. it's all he fucking wants and I'm so emotional

Idea for a story: this is less an idea so much as a demand but cygames show us his typical bad disguise. yukata alt sorta showed us what his "undercover" times are like and they keep confirming the headcanons that I have in fact even put in one of my fics but I wanna know so bad he's such a DORK

Unpopular opinion: I don't think he's fucking Siegfried. No, I don't think he's fucking Tor, either. also idk if it's actually unpopular or not but Aglovale is a bisexual. I know my kind.

Favorite relationship: aglomora-

but if we're sticking to canon, it's obviously gotta be the bond with his brothers, no? complicated as siblings can be, but he's so clearly been firmly ride or die for them since youth. boy was ready to sacrifice himself at least twice for them. and basically did moreso by taking on the task of being heir, since they've p much said outright Gahmuret was very strict.

tho I also wanna mention real quick I ADORE the way Lyria hits him w/the -san it's like everyone else is constantly reverent, respectful, he's the KING and Lyria comes in like "hi mr. aglovale :3" she's so cute

Favorite headcanon: [points] BISEXUAL

but if you want something I didn’t say before, we hc he has bunnies

[stinkrascal]

previous | next | beginning

TRANSCRIPT

picture one max: are you sick or something? you look like shit.

picture two ulrike: i'm not wearing makeup, jackass.

picture three max: you look like shit.

picture four max: oh, hey. finally decided to show yourself?

picture five wolfgang: fuck you. ulrike: did you bring a helmet? wolfgang: helmets are for pussies.

picture six ulrike: right, i forgot wearing a helmet is female shit. concussions are so masc.

picture seven wolfgang: I can't believe morgan's still trying. ulrike: she's getting a lot better, i think!

picture eight ulrike: she's only fallen three times! that's improvement, i'd say.

picture nine ulrike: you got this, baby! morgan: OH SHIT— ulrike: [ gasps ] morgan?! are you okay?!

picture ten ulrike: i'm gonna go help her! max: so... new hair? wolfgang: oh, yeah. figured i'd try something different.

picture eleven max: nice eyeliner. wolfgang: whatever, man, ladies love the eyeliner—you wouldn't know anything about that, though, would you, fairy boy? max: eat shit and die.

picture twelve wolfgang: starting early, huh? max: you want one? wolfgang: pass.

picture thirteen max: you sure? it's the ritual.

picture fourteen wolfgang: mom's going back in tonight, i gotta be straight to watch lucas. don't want her thinking i'm off.

picture fifteen max: that sucks. so where's your girl at? wolfgang: way out in the boonies. max: probably eating some people.

picture sixteen wolfgang: she said she's going camping with her family, and her brother's friends, and some chick named cassie.

picture seventeen vaughn: OH SHIT, WHAT WAS THAT?!

picture eighteen caspian: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH vaughn: [ laughs ] god, you're such a fucking pussy! you shitted your diaper, pussy boy?

picture nineteen caspian: [ murmurs ] fuck you. anastasia: *smacks* leave him alone! and don't use that word as an insult! this is why nobody likes you, ugly! vaughn: whatever, man hands. anastasia: whatever, fatherless! vaughn: whatever, forehead! anastasia: [ groans ] daaaaaaaaaaad!

picture twenty vladislaus: now, children, calm yourselves—your bickering will attract bears. i would much rather we avoid any encounters, don't you agree?

picture twenty-one ilya: if there's a bear, i'll set him on fire! breanna: how'd you suppose you're gonna do that?

picture twenty-two ilya: i can use your lighter to set it on fire, right momma? breanna: [ laughs ] not 'til you're older!

picture twenty-three karmen: ...there aren't really bears out here, are there? klaus: no, there are.

picture twenty-four breanna: oh, don't worry about that! vampires are way stronger than bears! vladislaus: yes, it is the werewolves you must mind.

picture twenty-five karmen: werewolves?!

picture twenty-six vladislaus: [ snickers ] don't mind me. i only jest.

[ejzah]

Can you do a fanfic where Kensi apologizes to Deeks for giving him such a hard time in season 8. I know she was having it rough because of her physical therapy, but she still shouldn't have taken out her anger on Deeks and I wish someone confronted her about it.

Hurt People Hurt People

***

“Thanks for stopping by, Sam. I really needed this,” Kensi said, brushing Sam’s hand with the back of her “claw”.

With her current impairments in mind, Sam had brought over a cheeseburger (cut into more manageable pieces) and fries. At least she could manage to feed herself now and a few other things, even if she had zero fine motor skills.

“Anytime. It’s pretty quiet without you there.” Sam squeezed her back. “Especially with Deeks out so much. Or worrying about you when he is at the office.” He looked around the room expectantly. “I figured he’d be here.”

Kensi grimaced, appetite evaporating in an instance at the mention of Deeks. They’d had another argument; well, she’d raised her voice while Deeks stood there with a sadness in his eyes that just made her feel worse.

“I told him to go home.” She shrugged nonchalantly, like it didn’t matter.

“I’m surprised he listened,” Sam commented, and there was enough of a question there that she dipped her head, pretending to show a sudden interest in picking up a fry. “Kensi, everything ok between you two?” he pressed when she said nothing.

“It’s just been really hard to be around him right now,” she replied heavily, moving food around as she felt another flare of frustration. “Every little thing I do, he acts like it’s some big step forward and like I’m not a broken mess. And he’s so positive and understanding all the time, when sometimes I just want to scream.“

She sucked in a deep breath, not having intended to reveal so much. She snuck an abashed look at Sam, expecting disappointment. Instead, she saw nothing but compassion.

“You’ve been through a lot. I’ve had injuries in the past, but nothing like this. It’s ok to be angry, frustrated, sad.”

Kensi felt her chest squeeze almost painfully tight at the acknowledgment of so much of what she’d felt since she woke up.

“Yeah,” she whispered. Sniffing, she grabbed a tissue, clumsily wiping her nose.

“Deeks has been through it too,” he continued in that same measured, gentle tone. “Not in the same ways for sure, or as bad, but he’s been here every step of the way with you.” He leaned back, lift curving in a smile that wasn’t entirely happy. “You didn’t see him those first weeks when you were in a coma. He was sleeping her every night, going into work for a few hours, coming back again. Terrified that something terrible would happen while he was gone.

“Through all of this, there’s not a lot that he can do though. He couldn’t make you wake up and he can’t make you walk or feel again any faster than you are. That’s on time, healing, and everything you’re working so hard on. All he can do, is pray, cheer you on, and be grateful for any all improvement. Be grateful that you’re still here with us.”

Kensi was quietly crying by the time Sam finished, desperately trying to wipe away the tears. The imagery Sam had created broke her heart. She could picture Deeks all alone with her nearly lifeless body in this room night after night, probably talking to her just the way he did when she couldn’t fall asleep or needed a distraction.

“I never thought of it that way,” she whispered. “God, I’ve been such a—”

“You’ve been recovering,” Sam interrupted firmly. He checked his watch. “Hey, I gotta get going.” Giving Kensi a hug, he nodded to a second plastic bag Kensi had forgotten about. “There’s two servings of chocolate cake in there. Just saying.”

“Thanks, Sam,” Kensi said against his chest. “For everything.”

***

Deeks knocked on Kensi’s door, hesitating in the doorway. “Hey,” he said softly, eyes a little uncertain, fingers tucked into the sleeves of his long sleeve shirt.

She’d done that. Pushing down the self-loathing that always seemed so close at hand these days, Kensi held her good arm out. A silent plea as much as an apology.

Deeks took the chair opposite her bed, staying silent for once. So, she’d have to break the ice this time. Drawing on her inner strength, she bridged the gap between them, and covered his hand as best she could.

“Thank you for coming,” she told him.

“I was kind of surprised you called me,” he admitted. “Thought I pissed you off for good this time.”

“No, you didn’t.” Deeks raised an eyebrow, and she amended. “Well, you did, but not because of anything you did. Not really.” She rushed on before he could interrupt with some form of absolution that she didn’t yet deserve. “I get so angry at myself and I feel so weak. I hate that you have to see me like this.”

“I don’t care about any of that,” Deeks inserted quickly. He raised her hand, carefully uncurling a couple fingers to kiss. Kensi pressed her lips together, amazed at his grace and love once again.

“I know,” she assured him. “That’s still the way my brain works. I think of all I’ve lost and what I might never get back. And I let it get to me. I let it warp everything you do for me. I never should have yelled at you like that.”

He pursed his lips, his mouth trembling as he fought whatever was going on in his head. When he spoke again, his voice lacked the usual confidence, soft and vulnerable. “I can be less positive, less talkative. You can shout or scream, or call me whatever helps. Just please don’t push me away.”

In that moment she wished more than anything that she could hold him. “I won’t,” she promised. “I’m so sorry, Deeks.”

As if he could read her mind, he scooted to the edge of his chair, and gently enfolded her in his arms.

“It’s ok. I forgive you.” The words were whispered against the side of her and punctuated by the softest of kisses. “I love you, baby.”

“I love you too.” She was crying again, and based on the he’s e of Deeks’ shoulders, he was too. They stayed there, Kensi curled up against chest for several minutes until the tears abated some.

Kensi pulled back, searching for another tissue, but Deeks beat her to it, wiping beneath her eyes with so much care it nearly had her in years all over again.

“You know, Sam was here earlier, and he left some cake,” she mentioned and Deeks laughed, a startled chuckle that made Kensi laugh wetly in response.

“That sounds really good right now,” he said, retrieving the bag, and scooting on the bed next to Kensi.

She watched him take out two clamshell containers, setting them up on the tray in front of her. She knew things were far from perfect, and she’d probably stumble again, but they were on the mend.

As Deeks placed a fork in the bigger piece of cake, and slid it in front of her, she leaned into his shoulder, curling her arm around his neck, pulling him to her for a kiss.

***

Thanks for the prompt!

[janirah]

Hi hello and happy Friday! A longtime follower here, just wanted to stop by and tell you that I really, really love your art. Your character designs are awesome and visually interesting (Narrator and John in particular, love the patterns on John's robe, but also Stanley and Arty) and I'm really fond of the colour palettes you use. Also, you're great at anatomy and pose structuring (that art with Arty and human John clinging to him because humanity sucks, my beloved), and your style hits the sweet spot between realistic proportions and stylisation. Also, great line work and colouring - I hope my line work skills get this good someday (just gotta practise consistently, which I'm Not very good at lmao.)

So yeah, just wanted to let you know I love your art and the dynamics you capture, a lot. Hope you have a nice weekend!

Oh my god, thank you so much for your words! =)

I'm very glad that you like my art with boys so much! I wish you to draw for your pleasure, because this is the most enjoyable way to improve your skills. Good wishes to you with your art!