#god i love jesse he's so fun to write

[littlemissmanga]

for the spicy prompts has anyone asked for #10 with Jesse 👀

Send me one of the following for a 200 word clone drabble

No. 10 is “Just lay back and let me take care of you.” OH-HO no one has and now it is officially whore o'clock!

Look I can't say WHY I get like this when it comes to Jesse, and honestly I don't think you want me to repent for the many sins that ran through my head while writing this.

He just does something to me.

Though I am proud to say I actually was able to keep this one close to the 200 word count. Though it be short, it packs a mighty punch.

Enjoy!

Pairing: Jesse x f!Reader

W/C: 269 (no I didn't plan that, yes I love it and so would Jesse)

Warning: NSFW, very spicy, Juicy Jesse got loose and made me a whore, oral (f receiving)

He had barely touched you and you were already making the sweetest noises for him. You were frantic in your movements, hands barely able to stay on one part of him too long now that he lay bare against you, finally in your arms again after another too-long campaign.

You arched against him, hips rubbing deliciously against his and causing him to curse, his already firm grip on your hips tightening.

“Careful, gorgeous. Keep that up and this will be a lot quicker than either of us want,” he warned. A needy whine broke past your lips as you strained against his grip, your hands sliding down to push against his lower back.

“Jesse… please.”

You looked up at him with those large eyes that could swallow a planet. By the Maker, he loved seeing you like this, so desperate for him, begging for him. Needing him and only him to make you feel good.

“Shh, baby, shh,” he cooed, pressing a soothing kiss to your lips before trailing his own down your neck. He quickly replaced his mouth with his hand, letting the gentle pressure ground you as his lips continued down, tracing the curves of your body to the apex of your thighs.  

“Just lay back and let me take care of you,” he ordered, not giving you a chance to resist before swiping his tongue through your folds, groaning at your taste on his tongue. He was going to take his time breaking you apart so that when he was ready to fuck you, you’d be too pleasure drunk to do anything but hold on tight.

[wonustars]

JESS OH MY GOSH YOUVE DONE IT AGAIN… CONSTATLY RAISING THE BAR FOR US ALL. TALENTED. BRILLIANT. INCREDIBLE. AMAZING. SHOWSTOPPING. SPECTACULAR. NEVER THE SAME. I LOVEDDDDDDDDD THIS SO MUCH . IM SPEECHLESS!!!!

not according to plan | hjs

summary: your ex-fiance is getting married and everyone you know is going to be there. when he calls to ask if you're coming, you accidentally mention a boyfriend. which would be fine, if you weren't very single. thankfully your best friend comes through with the perfect solution when he sets you up with a friend of his. what could possibly go wrong?

pairing: joshua x f.reader genre: fake dating, strangers to friends to ?? | fluff, slight angst, smut rating: explicit, minors DNI word count: ~22.1k notes/warnings: johnny suh as the ex-fiancee (sorry, he's not great in this), other idols born in '95 used as background characters, mentions of past cheating, food & alcohol, lots of "dates", reader is referenced as coming from a rich family, mention of being an escort (minus the sex?) smut warnings: making out, multiple smut scenes (kind of, it could be a continuation), multiple orgasms, teasing, they're both v obsessed with each other's bodies, protected sex, fingering, nipple play, oral sex (f. receiving), scratching/marking, squirting, overstimulation, use of lube, i think that's it (but let me know if it's not)

author's note: this fic is dedicated to the lovely @shuadotcom, i'm so sorry it took me literal months to finish fake dating!joshua but here we are anyway. i'm not sure how this one got so away from me either lmao. banner credit to the beautiful @wongyuseokie who (again) did this very last minute. thank you to @wonwussy & @kwanisms for the mid-fic beta. thank you to @wooahaeproductions, @horanghater, @cheolism, & @hannieween for listening to me talk about this and helping with things like petnames & dates.

taglist at the end (& join my permanent taglist here)

“It’s fine, it’s been years and I’m over it. Plus, I’ve been seeing someone anyway and he’s great. So I wasn’t ignoring your invite,” you say without a second thought. 

It’s just a stream of consciousness. The lie comes flying out of your mouth faster than your brain can process it. That’s exactly what it is, too. A lie. You’re not seeing anyone and haven’t been in a serious relationship since the person on the other end of the call broke your heart. 

“Oh, wow, sorry, I didn’t mean to…well, I didn’t know. My mom didn’t say anything when she said she had spoken to your mom about whether or not you were coming to the wedding,” Johnny says with a little bit of ramble. 

“You know how my mom can be, I haven’t had the chance to tell her yet,” you deflect. 

“I’m happy for you, then,” Johnny says. 

“Thanks, I’m happy for you, too,” you force out. Somehow, it doesn’t sound like the lie you know that it is.

“So, it’s not weird, then? I mean our moms are best friends, so the rest of your family is all going to be there. A lot of your friends will be there. I know you haven’t RSVP’d yet, but…” Johnny starts.

“Nope! Not weird at all,” you utter, hoping that your voice sounds even. “It’d be weirder if I wasn’t there, right?” 

“Probably, yeah,” Johnny says. “That’s great, though. Do you want me to mark you down as a yes? I can even add a plus-one, if you want to bring your partner.” 

“That’s so thoughtful, but I wouldn’t want to put you out. I know how expensive weddings can be,” you say and try to sound sincere.

“No, it’s no issue, actually. We have a few extra seats that we left just in case we forgot someone or didn’t know about someone’s partner,” Johnny presses. “So we’ll see you both there?”

“Yeah, you will,” you hurry out. This conversation needs to be over. 

It’s only an hour after hanging up with your ex-fiancee that your mom calls to tell you she can’t believe she had to hear it from Mrs. Suh that you’re dating someone. Which includes a whole lot of deflecting and promises about when she can meet this mystery man. Another twenty minutes after you hang up with your mom, you get a pointed text from your younger sister. The two of you haven’t ever been all that close, so she shouldn’t be surprised that you haven’t mentioned him. She made her side pretty clear when she maintained her friendship with Johnny’s new fiancée. That new fiancee, a close friend of your sisters, also just so happened to be the girl he cheated on you with. So, she can hardly expect to have a close sister bond. Yet, she seems oddly suspicious that she didn’t know you were seeing someone seriously. 

Your quiet Saturday afternoon turns into a full blown headache all thanks to one call from the asshole that you really thought you left in the past. Of course, now is the perfect time for him to pop back up. Now, when you’re even between any sort of casual sex. Now, when you don’t even have someone that you can call up to pretend to date you. This is going to be one of the worst calls that you have to make when you have to admit you made it all up, that you will absolutely not be showing your face at the wedding, and you will also be changing your name before moving away.

For now, you do the only thing that you can think of doing. You call the only person that can give you any perspective on this whole fucking disaster. 

“Well hello,” your best friend answers. 

“Jeonghan, I fucked up,” you say without preamble. 

“This is gonna be good,” he responds. 

“I just got off the phone with my mom,” you begin.

“What did she want?” he asks, knowing that it won’t be anything good.

“Well, you know, to talk about this new boyfriend of mine,” you continue.

“You haven’t dated anyone in forever,” Jeonghan chuckles. 

“Thank you for that,” you snark. “And then, of course, I get a text from my perfect sister wondering why she’s also just hearing about this boyfriend of mine.” 

“Why do your sister and your mom think you’re dating someone?” Jeonghan asks.

“Oh, well, you know. Johnny called today,” you offer.

“Fuck that guy,” Jeonghan interjects.

“He wanted to know why I hadn’t responded to his wedding invite and assumed it was awkward because I was single, so I told him I was seeing someone,” you finally finish.

“For fuck’s sake,” Jeonghan says into the silence and you can imagine his face.

“Right? My life is a fucking mess and now Johnny thinks that I’m bringing my boyfriend,” you groan.

“I’ll start planning the story for why you suddenly left town,” Jeonghan says. 

“For real, my life is over,” you whine.

“What are you gonna do?” Jeonghan asks softly. 

This is really why you called him. Jeonghan is a shithead, sometimes, and he can be a bit of a chaos demon. He also can be a bit of a schemer, especially when it comes to winning a game. But, he’s unfailingly kind and caring to the people he holds dear. He absolutely hates getting into any kind of real conflict with his friends. There’s that whole side to him that honestly wouldn’t hurt a fly and always has a way to comfort. That’s the side that you get now. 

“I don’t know,” you answer, voice just as quiet. “I’m just…I don’t want to let him win, you know?”

And Jeonghan does know. You’ve been friends since before you started dating Johnny. Even though he never liked him, Jeonghan supported you in your relationship. When Johnny proposed, he called your other friends and set up the best engagement party anyone could ask for. From the outside, nobody would ever know that he hated your partner. Honestly, he’s the best friend anyone in the world could ask for. 

Before he got around to setting up the bridal shower, which he’d been quietly planning for months, your whole world turned upside down. Johnny cheated, had been cheating awhile, actually, and Jeonghan was there to pick up the pieces. Somehow, he was the only one that seemed to make it better, probably because he didn’t want to act like things were okay when they weren’t. It was easy to cry in front of him, easy to be vulnerable, easy to just let the process play out so you could heal. Even though he never liked Johnny, he also didn’t say he told you so. This had never been something that crossed his mind. 

“Okay, you’re gonna hate it, but I have an idea,” Jeonghan says.

“Those are never comforting words coming from you,” slips out of your mouth.

“Usually I’d yell at you, but…” he trails off. 

“I swear, if you’re about to say that we pretend to be dating like some romcom, I will hang up the phone,” you warn.

“First of all, that’s rude, I’m a great boyfriend,” Jeonghan says. 

“I never said you weren’t, Hannie, you know I think you’re gorgeous,” you sigh. 

“That’s true, I am,” Jeonghan says through a laugh.

“But, I also know you remember what an unmitigated disaster it was when we fucked,” you point out, earning an even louder laugh. 

“Wow, and here I thought that it was actually great sex,” he says. 

“I’m not gonna keep stroking your ego, I already admitted you were gorgeous. I don’t need to praise the sex, too,” you declare.

“Stroking my…come on, you’re making it too easy,” Jeonghan points out.

“Funny, because I remember you being the easy one that night,” you say, finally managing to get a shot in.

“I hate you,” Jeonghan snorts. 

“I know,” you answer. “Didn’t you say that you had an idea?” 

Jeonghan clears his throat. “Right, yeah. Well, I know this guy and maybe he can help you out.” 

“What is he, an escort?” you snort out.

“Do you want my help or not?” Jeonghan asks.

“Yoon Jeonghan, are you about to set me up with an escort?” you challenge.

“No, of course not, just trust me,” he says.

Just trust me might be the three most terrifying words that could come out of Jeonghan’s mouth, especially when you’re not usually on the receiving end of his schemes. It’s not like you have much choice, though. The wedding is in six weeks and you have to find a solution, fast. So, what choice do you have other than trusting your best friend? How could this go wrong? 

You still think this is a terrible idea, yet agree to meet Jeonghan’s friend, Joshua, anyway. Apparently, he’s somewhat new to the area, doesn’t know many people, and is incredibly easy to be around. There’s no mention of why Jeonghan thinks he might be willing to pretend to be your boyfriend. A part of you wonders if your friend even told him, but he’s not that cruel. So, whatever the case, Joshua must at least have some idea of what he’s walking into. 

Several days pass between the nightmare of a call from Johnny and you actually meeting Joshua, which only adds to your anxiety about whether or not this is going to work. Johnny is asking for a name for the seating chart and for dinner selections. Your mom wants to know when they’ll be able to meet this new boyfriend before the wedding (because “meeting him for the first time at a wedding is gauche” and we wouldn’t want that). Your sister is convinced that he doesn’t actually exist since you haven’t posted him on social media. That you can at least answer to say that not everyone posts their entire life online like she does. It doesn’t seem to allay her suspicions, though. 

Then, there’s the fact that you’re actually meeting Joshua for the first time at dinner. All you wanted was to go for coffee, yet he insisted. You couldn’t exactly press the point. Not when you’re planning to ask this stranger to pretend to date you just so that you can avoid the embarrassment at your ex’s wedding. On top of that, because Jeonghan really is a demon at his core, you don’t know what Joshua looks like. Don’t know who to look for. Which leads to you doing the only sensible thing and showing up 5 minutes late for dinner, hoping that he’ll already be at the table when you get there.

It works.

When you give the reservation name at the host stand, you’re immediately led back to a table. Without even thinking about it, you smooth your hands down the front of your dress, looking for a small amount of comfort in this situation. It’s not even that you struggle around new people, this is just…well, it’s a lot. It’s out of anyone’s comfort zone. Whatever you’re expecting, it’s not the man sitting at the table the host leads you to. He nearly stops you in your tracks. 

His black hair is perfectly styled down to the pieces on one side that come down over his forehead. The black dress shirt he wears is open at least one button too many, but he makes the exposed chest look work in a way models would envy. Even though his pants are black as well, he makes it look classic and effortless, rather than too dark. That’s all without even acknowledging the soft smile on his face. This man would break a thousand hearts without even saying a damn word. While you’re appreciating him, you miss the way his eyes rake over you appreciatively. Miss the way his eyes trace your curves and the way the dress clings to you. 

In one fluid motion, he’s standing up to greet you, a gentle kiss placed on your cheek. Is it weird if your knees are a little weak? Well, even if it is, there’s nothing you can do. You’re completely captivated. 

“You must be Joshua,” you say. Brilliant, you think. That’s obvious.

“It’s nice to meet you. Jeonghan had nothing but good things to say,” he answers with another smile as he pulls your seat out for you. 

“I feel like he hardly told me about you,” you respond. Joshua raises a perfect eyebrow at that.

“Then why did you agree to go out with me?” Joshua asks. 

“Go out with…is this a date?” The question comes tumbling out. 

Joshua’s eyes widen in genuine confusion. “Is it not?” 

“What, exactly, did Jeonghan say to you?” 

A lot and nothing at all, it turns out. Joshua tells you about how he’s somewhat new to the area, which you knew. About how he met Jeonghan through work, kind of. They work in the same building doing very different things and happened to run into each other getting coffee a handful of times before Jeonghan introduced himself. The two had hung out several times, something Jeonghan had not really mentioned, and gotten to know each other over drinks more than once. The very first time, Jeonghan had mentioned you and Joshua admits immediately being intrigued without pressing for more information. 

In any case, Jeonghan talked about you pretty freely, a fact that’s hardly surprising. Before Joshua texted you, Jeonghan had mentioned, in what Joshua calls an offhand way, that you were sick of dating the same people. According to Joshua, through Jeonghan, you were looking to possibly be set up. (Read: Jeonghan thinks he’s crafty and isn’t going to come out and tell this man what you’re really looking for. Typical Jeonghan, honestly. You know that “offhand comment” was anything but. And you had the audacity to think Jeonghan would have to tell Joshua what he’s getting into. Rookie move.)

Now you’re in a bit of an awkward situation because this man is honestly gorgeous, one of the prettiest humans you’ve ever met. And, already, he seems like he might be sweet with a pretty good sense of humor. It’s just…well, you’re absolutely not looking for a relationship and this is the last person you want to get involved in your mess. Thankfully, you get a moment to catch your breath when someone comes by to take a drink order and suggest an appetizer. It’s just enough time for you to talk yourself into telling Joshua the real story.

To his credit, he only looks mildly surprised as you outline your whole situation, inform him that yes, Jeonghan does know all of this, and clarify why you didn’t actually realize it was a date. It’s hard to miss the way his eyes seem to sparkle a bit when you also admit that he’s absolutely stunning in a way that hurts your feelings. Easier to miss is the way his face barely falls when you say that you’re not actually looking for something right now. Interesting. 

“So that’s the whole thing and now that I’ve embarrassed myself in front of you, I’m sure you’ll understand if we never see each other after tonight,” you finish.

“How am I supposed to go to a wedding as your boyfriend in a matter of weeks if we don’t see each other after tonight?” Joshua wonders.

“I…what?” you sputter out. 

“Well, sure, we need to work out a few details, but I’m game,” Joshua says with a shrug.

“I’m sorry, I think I’m just really confused?” You don’t even have food yet and this is already the most interesting date you’ve been on, possibly ever. 

“I, uh, may have left a part of my past out when I was sharing what Jeonghan knew about me,” Joshua says. “And honestly, I can’t believe I didn’t catch it or that he did this. I’d be mad if I wasn’t so impressed by how crafty it was.” 

“I’m going to need you to connect some dots for me,” you admit. “Oh and also never tell Jeonghan you appreciate him being crafty. His ego is too big as it is.”

“The first time Jeonghan and I hung out, we went out for drinks, got a little wasted, and I told him about how I got through my university studies without any debts,” Joshua says, pausing long enough for someone to set the appetizer down. “He’s observant, Jeonghan, I’ll give him that. He noticed I had designer clothes, shoes, that kind of thing. And he noticed I didn’t pay attention to the prices of the drinks. So I made a vague comment about being lucky to have found a way through my studies without taking out loans.”

“I’m sure he asked you about that, he loves it when he thinks there’s a scheme,” you note with a smile.

“You’re right about that,” Joshua agrees. “So I, well I told him. When I was in school, I met this woman out one night and she paid me to go to events with her. She wanted, and these were her words, ‘someone young and hot’ with her. And the next four years, that’s what I did. I let people pay for me to go to events with them. Never more than that. I was clear that I wasn’t selling sex or anything, just company.” 

You lean back in your seat with an appraising look. “An entrepreneur from the beginning.” 

“Hey, no judgment,” Joshua says. All you can do is smile.

“I’m not judging, that was really smart and you’re obviously attractive enough for it,” you acknowledge.

“Thank you,” Joshua says. It doesn’t have the air of cockiness Jeonghan’s answer would. He actually seems sincere in accepting the compliment. 

“But, I’m still not going to pay you to pretend to be my boyfriend,” you say, even if it’s a bit reluctant. 

“I wasn’t asking you to,” Joshua shrugs. “You don’t have to pay me.”

“Why would you offer to pretend to do something like this? You don’t even know me,” you point out.

“No, I don’t. But, you seem like a good person. And I like Jeonghan, he’s nice…” Joshua says, stopping when you try to cover a scoff. 

“Nice?” you question when you’re caught.

“Wrong word choice,” Joshua dismisses. “He seems like the kind of person that’s a loyal friend, like he would go into battle to protect you. Like someone you can actually trust.”

“He is all of those things, yeah,” you admit.

“And if those things are true, then him holding you out as his best friend means you’re probably all of those things too,” Joshua reasons. 

“I try to be,” you agree. 

“Plus, Jeonghan did mention you had seriously dated someone that was pretty rich, so I figure it’s probably the guy getting married and it’ll be a nice wedding,” Joshua says with a smile. The joke is obvious by the look in his eyes.

“It’s interesting that he mentioned Johnny, that’s my ex, being rich,” you idly comment.

“Is he not?” Joshua wonders.

“Jeonghan is a lot of things, but he’d never lie to his friends,” you answer first. “So, yeah, he is. Well, his family is at least. His mom and mine run a lot of events together, like galas and shit. That’s how we all know each other.”

“Are you rich, too?” Joshua wonders. There’s that little twinkle of something in his eyes again, but there’s also sincerity.

“I’m still not paying you,” you retort.

“Fine,” Joshua agrees. 

You roll your eyes. “Okay, so what’s the plan?” 

There’s a weird world’s colliding feeling to having both Jeonghan and Joshua in your apartment. But, Jeonghan doesn’t like to be left out of things. Once you told him that you and Joshua both knew about his scheming, he offered to help in any way he could. Which is likely just so he’s included. You’ll take what you can get. Now, it means that he and Joshua are sitting on your couch, scrolling through pictures on Joshua’s phone to decide what to include in an instagram post. That’s the first step you and Joshua agreed on. If you’re going to sell this whole fake relationship, then your sister actually is right. There has to be some sort of proof of it online. Which also means that your post has to talk about how you’ve been keeping it quiet and just enjoying getting to know each other without any pressure. Jeonghan takes credit for that, even if you got there on your own. 

“I think I like this one,” Jeonghan says and turns the phone around to show you. 

“Why that one?” you ask. 

“Why not? Don’t you like it?” Joshua worries.

“I don’t know, I feel like my hand is doing something weird,” you point out.

“You look great,” Joshua assures you.

“Oh, ew, you’re not really dating,” Jeonghan complains. 

“You do know you’re going to have to stop saying that, right?” you ask.

“Maybe I didn’t know either,” Jeonghan shrugs.

“No, I’m with her, you’re her best friend and you definitely would’ve known,” Joshua agrees. 

“Why are you on her side already?” Jeonghan whines.

“Because she’s cool and she’s not the one who knew what I did in college and set me up,” Joshua says with a laugh. 

This is how it’s been going for the last hour. You’re not really much for putting a lot of effort into your posts, so this all feels like too much. But, you know that it’s important for it to feel real and it’s important to get it right. You’re honestly pretty happy to just let the guys take the lead and go with the flow of it all. There are going to be plenty of opportunities for you to take the lead. You’re going to take your breaks where you can. 

(That had also meant not putting up too much of a fight when Jeonghan told you to bring multiple outfits with you. Or when you had to change your hairstyle and makeup between the photos so it looked like they hadn’t all been taken the same day. Honestly, this was so much easier for Joshua. Then again, he’s the one doing you a favor. So maybe you can let him have it.)

After you finally get your couple pictures posted, and get a flurry of messages ranging from surprise to congratulations, you move onto preparing Joshua to meet your parents, your sister, and her husband. Jeonghan is actually a lot of help with that because he’s been around them a lot. Well, he’s helpful after he tries to scare Joshua about how intimidating it’s going to be only to give up when Joshua is unbothered. He’s so calm about everything that it’s actually kind of nice to be around. And he has no problem firing back at Jeonghan, which is really fun to watch. 

You go through what your parents are like, what they do both for work and as hobbies. Joshua perks up at the mention of your dad loving music and sometimes spending his weekends just exploring new venues. It seems like there might be more to that, though you don’t press when he waves it off. It’s different when you talk about your sister, two years younger and already married. Not that you’re dying to be married or even care that she got married before you. That’s always seemed like a weird societal expectation, anyway. What does it matter when anyone gets married? If it’s their right person, then it makes sense. You being upset over your failed engagement really doesn’t have anything to do with your sister’s marriage, despite her instance it does. 

It becomes obvious that you’re losing Jeonghan’s attention when you turn down his request to start playing games or watch a movie. It’s not that you don’t want to do those things, it’s just that you have a lot to cover in far less time than you realized. Sure, the wedding is still weeks away. What’s not weeks away is your first dinner with your family. That’s going to be around the corner. The least you could do, you figured, was plan a time before posting pictures on instagram. So, Jeonghan asks if it’s okay to leave and you almost sigh in relief. This will be easier without an extra person.

“Not to pry, but what’s the deal with you and Jeonghan?” Joshua asks when you settle back on the couch with a glass of wine. 

“What do you mean?” you ask.

“I don’t know, I feel like I was picking up on something,” Joshua shrugs.

“We’re really just friends,” you assure him.

“Sometimes those are the best…” Joshua starts.

“Don’t,” you cut off. He worries for a second before he realizes you’re smiling. “We did try. Not so much a try, I guess, but we slept together maybe 6 months after Johnny and I broke it off and it just wasn’t it.” 

“You and him slept together?” Joshua questions.

“Is that weird for you?” you ask.

“No, it’s just interesting that you’re still so close,” Joshua observes.

“I guess,” you say with a shrug. “He’s great, obviously attractive, but we just, I don’t know. I didn’t feel anything. Neither did he. So, staying friends seemed like the right choice.”

“Interesting,” is all Joshua says. “Have you dated anyone seriously since Johnny?” 

“Not that seriously, no,” you admit. “I’ve gone on dates with different people and some of them stuck around for a bit, but nothing serious.” 

“Not finding the right people?” Joshua presses.

“I just haven’t found anyone that made me feel like Johnny did at the beginning or even like I did when he proposed,” you say. 

“I can understand that, even if I don’t really get it. You’re gorgeous, anyone would be lucky,” he says smoothly. You cover a blush with a slight eye roll. 

“I guess that’s why most of my close friends will also believe that I kept a new relationship on the low. They saw me post-Johnny and have seen me try to date,” you share.

“Yeah that’s good for us, at least,” Joshua agrees.

“What about you, though? When was your last relationship?” you ask.

“Ah, well it’s been a little over a year,” Joshua says. 

“Bad ending?” you wonder. You’re not sure why you press him on it.

“It wasn’t great,” Joshua says with a chuckle. “She, uh, well she decided that she just really would rather be with one of my friends than with me.”

“I’m so sorry you went through that,” you say, suddenly sorry.

“No, no, it’s fine,” he says. “She didn’t actually cheat on me, but she had started getting close to him and sharing everything with him.”

“Arguably worse, in my opinion. Emotional cheating is still a thing,” you say, trying to offer comfort. 

“Thank you,” Joshua says. His eyes are soft and full of care. “And, like you, I have dated since then, just nothing worth talking about.” 

It’s an easy transition from that into talking about your backgrounds. Like speed dating, except somehow more intense. You learn Joshua’s birthday, his parents names, that he’s an only child, and where he grew up. Nothing is too small and you joke about taking notes before you actually go to get a notebook. Joshua tells you his favorite color and his favorite food, tells you about his favorite memories, favorite places where he grew up, and favorite places he’s found since moving here. There’s a way that his face lights up when he talks about his friends that’s drawing you in. You tell him the same. That all feels a little surface level, which you point out. If this is going to work, it has to be deeper, more serious. 

That’s when something seems to almost break down. Joshua suggests that you tell each other the deep stuff, the things that you don’t always admit to someone you’re dating. Or, maybe you admit it and don’t get into the reasons why. When Joshua goes first and admits that he’s happiest when he’s playing his guitar, even if nobody else is listening, his whole face changes. It’s like a completely different version of him. He’s got an open face as it is, that hasn’t changed, but you realize maybe he’s a little guarded behind the smile as well. Maybe there really is more depth than he wants anyone to realize. Maybe this is going to be more interesting than you thought.

“Can I hear you play?” you ask. His face is adorable with his eyes full of surprise.

“You want to hear me play?” There’s an emotion you can’t place when he looks at you.

“I love music, too, Joshua,” you say softly. “I’d love to see what you’re passionate about.”

“Oh, well, I usually play at this acoustic night on Thursdays at a coffee shop downtown,” Joshua tells you.

“You do? That’s so cute!” you say before second guessing it. He looks away like he’s a little embarrassed and you worry for a split second.

“I’d love it if you came by,” he says.

“It’s a shame that we can’t say that’s where we met,” you admit.

“Wait, that would be a good idea, actually,” Joshua says and you smile. 

“It would be, but I also know events like that. It’s always a similar crowd so I’m sure someone will know that I’ve never been,” you reason. 

“Fair point,” Joshua concedes. 

“Why don’t we just say we met on a dating app?” you suggest and Joshua pulls up his face. “Okay, I know apps are lame and honestly, I don’t use them much. But, think about it. That’s the perfect reason why we didn’t bring it up until now, we didn’t want to answer the ‘where did you meet’ question by saying an app.” 

“Okay, yeah, I do actually like that because it’s easy and it doesn’t feel like a wild story,” Joshua says. 

“What about your parents?” you ask. “Do we need to make plans to meet them if you’re also posting about me?” 

“We can figure that out, but they live pretty far away so it would probably just be over FaceTime or something,” he says.

“I also understand if you don’t want to do that because we’re just pretending,” you suggest. 

“No, it’d be cool to have you meet them. Even if the relationship isn’t real, I’d like to be friends for real, so that’s not a total lie,” Joshua reasons. 

“I’d like to be friends too,” you agree. “How long have you been living here, now?” 

“Oh, um, like 8 months?” Joshua says like a question.

“I was figuring like a month or two with the way Jeonghan talks about you,” you laugh. 

“You’ve been friends with him for years, you’re not actually surprised,” Joshua points out. 

“Okay so now I guess we have to figure out when we started dating,” you comment.

“And everything else, but we can do it,” Joshua says. 

You’re a little nervous sitting on your couch waiting for Joshua to show up. Even though you offered to pick him up for dinner with your family tonight, he insisted on being the one to drive. Of course he’s right on time, which you’re already realizing is a trait of his. He’s even a gentleman when he opens the door for you, just like he pulled the chair out the first time you met for the date-not-date. As you put your seatbelt on, you notice that there are a few things in the backseat. 

“What’s all that?” you ask as he slides into the driver’s seat. 

“Flowers for your mom, a bottle of scotch for your dad, and a cheese board for your sister because you said they just moved and she likes to host,” Joshua lists off as if it’s nothing.

“You did not have to get things for all of them,” you point out. 

“Of course I did, but I also wanted to. I’m trying to make a good impression,” he says, making your heart a little light.

“That’s so kind,” you whisper out.

“Oh, I thought of something else,” Joshua shifts. You’re worried you made him uncomfortable until he speaks again. “Are you a pet name person in relationships?”

That makes you snort, something that would embarrass you in any other situation. It’s not the first time he’s heard it, though. “That depends on what you want to call me.”

“That’s a dangerous way to say that,” Joshua answers. His eyes are still on the road, yet you don’t miss the way he reacts.

“I don’t like overly cutesy names,” you say to diffuse a little bit of the moment. “Like, I don’t know, if you want to call me sugarplum or honeybunch or something like that, please don’t.”

“You’re just giving me ideas to take away my fun,” he pouts.

“Well, what were you thinking of calling me? Or are you even a pet name person?” you ask.

“I do like them,” Joshua says. “I’m not sure that I have a go-to or anything. For you, I might say angel or possibly darling.”

“I think I prefer angel, if I’m allowed to pick,” you say after a moment.

“Of course,” Joshua replies. Studying his face, you’re looking for a hint of mocking or insincerity, but there’s nothing to find. This is just him.

“Do you want me to use a pet name for you?” you wonder.

“I’d happily take one, no pressure, though,” he says. 

“I’ll have to think about it,” you tell him. “Something generic like babe doesn’t feel right.”

“Are you saying I’m special?” Now you can hear the light teasing in his voice. 

“I take it back, any more compliments are going to go to your head,” you huff out. 

As you get closer to your parents’ house, you start to bounce your knee with an excess of nervous energy. It’s not until Joshua reaches a hand out to take one of yours that you’re even sure you’re doing it. There’s something calming about it, though. Nothing about him reaching out feels like he’s trying to stop you, just show that you’re not alone in this. Which is more than welcome. The last person you brought to meet your parents was Johnny. Given how that ended and why Joshua is around in the first place, it’s not exactly the most comforting thought.

Once you pull up to their house, you take a deep breath. It’s only to settle your rising nerves, but it also serves to give Joshua enough time to come and open your door. Even though you’ve told him that he doesn’t need to be this sweet, he insists. Without saying a word, he holds out a hand to help you out of the car. Instead of dropping your hand once you’re out, he uses it to pull you into him and wraps his arms around you. There’s this immediate sense of comfort, like you have actually been dating for months. You inhale his cologne without meaning to, something warm and woodsy. 

“It’s going to be fine, parents love me,” he assures you when you pull away.

“I don’t doubt that,” you say, releasing the breath you were holding and your tension with it. 

“So come on, my little granola wrapper, let’s go,” Joshua says as he lets you go to get the gifts out of his backseat. 

It takes you a full few seconds to register what came out of his mouth. “I’m sorry, what did you just call me?” 

“Is that not the one?” he asks, eyes alight with some kind of mischief. 

“I’m not going to encourage this,” you huff.

“Whatever you say, jellybean,” he throws out casually. 

The second you step into the house, you see exactly what Joshua means. Your mother is fawning over him in a matter of seconds, your father is making plans to show him his records, your sister’s husband is asking when they can go out for drinks, and your sister even holds back the snark. All during the course of the pre-dinner drinks and largely, you think, due to the gifts that Joshua brought. He had a reason for the meaning behind the type of flowers for your mother, a favorite musician who swore by the scotch for your dad, and even bought the cheese board from a small business that customized things. 

Dinner comes along and you still feel like you’ve barely said anything with Joshua masterfully steering the conversation. He even makes it sound good that you met on an app, with his improvised story of wanting to meet people in a new city. According to him, he wasn’t expecting to meet someone like you and was done for the second he saw you sitting at dinner. It’s something real, that you met him for dinner the first time at a fancy downtown restaurant. And you realize you never actually asked what his impression was that first night. More than once, you catch yourself watching his profile as he talks to one of your family members. Everything about him is at ease and you wonder if it really is all fake. Not that you think anything about him is disingenuous, he’s just really good at making people like him. 

The only hiccup doesn’t come until your mother is pulling out dessert. According to your sister, she’s got an excellent pie in the refrigerator that you simply have to try. You’re about to say something when Joshua beats you to it. 

“I don’t think my little sugarplum likes fruit pies, but it sounds amazing and I’d love a piece,” Joshua interjects smoothly. 

Your sister nearly spits out her drink, whether it’s at the nickname or him speaking up for you, you’re not sure. In any other situation, you would scold him for the name, but you’re a little stunned he remembers you don’t like pie. It came up once in a rapid fire of likes and dislikes. 

“You’re right, she doesn’t,” your sister agrees. “I’d almost forgotten.” 

(That’s when you’re sure it was another of your sister’s tests. Trying to catch you in some kind of lie about your relationship. But, it doesn’t work and you feel a little victorious for that.)

The doorbell rings through the house and you look to your mother, silently asking if she’s expecting someone. It’s unusual for them to have company calling this late on a Friday night. It’s usually reserved for dinners with friends or family or galas. Unsurprisingly, your mother doesn’t seem to know who it could be, but disappears to answer the door all the same. When a voice drifts through from the hallway, you freeze on the spot.

“I really just came by to drop that off for my mom, I didn’t realize it was so late. I’d hate to intrude on dessert,” the guest says. 

“Nonsense, you’re not interrupting,” your mother insists. 

“I saw an unfamiliar car, so I figured you might have guests,” he says as they come through the doorway into the living area. 

Your heart stutters a little in your chest, feels heavier for seeing him. Somehow he looks taller and broader than the last time you saw him. He’s wearing his hair shorter and he looks more mature, somehow, like he’s seen so much more of the world than when you were together. Which is probably true, if you think about it. It’s been a couple years and that means he’s had more time working with his father. 

“That would be my car,” Joshua says, getting to his feet immediately and extending his hand. “I’m Joshua.” 

“Johnny,” he answers and shakes Joshua’s hand. Yet, his face looks a little tense and his eyes mostly stay on you. 

“It’s just family,” your mother shares, though Johnny can obviously see that himself, “since our darling daughter finally brought Joshua around to meet us.” 

“I’m glad she did, dinner was wonderful and the company was even better,” Joshua says with a smile at your mother. She nearly blushes at his compliment. 

“Oh, hush,” your mother says with a wave of her hand. “I was just getting some pie if you’d like to stay for a piece, Johnny. Although, I’d hate to keep you from home.”

Joshua sits back down next to you, a little closer than is strictly necessary, and puts his arm along the back of the couch behind you. You feel safe pressed up against his side like that. Johnny clears his throat when he looks away from the pair of you. “Gabby has been out of town all week, actually, so I’m going back to an empty home anyway. I’d love to stay for a piece of your famous cherry pie.” 

“Great!” your mother says and disappears off into the kitchen. 

“What’s got Gabby away?” your sister asks. 

“Just a conference,” Johnny answers. “There was a final banquet tonight and she’ll be home tomorrow.” 

“She’s busy, away this week, bachelorette next weekend,” she says offhand. 

“Keeping tabs on when everything is?” you ask of your sister. She looks at you like you’re crazy and Johnny looks awkward.

“No, I was invited to it,” your sister answers evenly. 

Before you can even answer, Joshua is speaking up. Probably sensing your discomfort. After all, you hadn’t gotten to tell him that Johnny’s fiance is friends with your younger sister. They had gone to school together and been close. Stealing her sister’s fiancée doesn’t seem to have impacted the friendship. 

“You must be excited with the big day getting so close,” Joshua says. He moves his arm from behind you so that he can take your hand on your thigh. It makes you look down at your hands before glancing at him, only to find his gaze on you already. It also means you miss the way Johnny follows the movement. 

“Uh, yeah, I mean, I’m definitely excited. It’s just been a lot of planning,” Johnny says. 

“I bet,” Joshua says. “Thank you so much for inviting me, I know how stressful changes can be.” 

“It’s no problem, I’m happy you’ll both be there,” Johnny says. 

With almost a practiced subtlety, Joshua squeezes your hand. There’s so much in that one movement. A reassurance, a reminder to breathe, a reminder that he’s there, a promise that everything is going to be okay. Your heart hurts seeing Johnny sitting in the living room so casually as if nothing happened, but it doesn’t hurt as much as you expected. Maybe that has something to do with this impossibly kind, completely idiotic person next to you. You also can’t help the way your gaze lands on him. Just in profile, at first, before he senses your look and turns to you with a dazzling smile. It’s like there’s nobody else in the world but the two of you.

The conversation shifts slightly when your mother comes back in with a tray full of pie slices and your father comes back with whatever record he was looking for to show Joshua. Just like that, you survive your first in-person interaction with Johnny. Actually come out of it feeling like you might be able to handle this. The smile you send Joshua while he’s eating his pie is so fond that you’re not even sure who you are. 

“I can’t believe you didn’t call me last night,” Jeonghan says in lieu of a hello.

“Hello to you too, I’m good, thanks for asking,” you retort.

“Greetings are for people who remember their best friends, not for people who send a single sentence recap after bringing their fake boyfriend home to meet the family,” Jeonghan states immediately.

“That’s a very long rule,” you note.

“Deserved, though,” Jeonghan says.

“I was tired, Han, it was a long night,” you explain.

“A long night where your ex showed up,” he reminds you.

“That actually wasn’t so bad,” you admit. “Joshua made it feel pretty easy.”

“Oh did he now?” 

You don’t have to be in the same room as Jeonghan to hear the expression on his face when he says that. “It was just easy, Jeonghan, nothing more than that.”

“What did your parents think?” he asks, switching gears.

“They loved him, like actually loved him. My mom was enamored and kept calling him handsome. My dad was talking about music with him and making plans to go check out some acoustic music venue. Even the ice queen couldn’t find anything to fault him for,” you share.

“She’s less of an ice queen and more of a mean girl and a bitch,” Jeonghan adds.

“You said it,” you mumble.

“I mean, come on, who thinks it’s okay for their friend to sleep with their sister’s fiancé? And then stays friends with the girl?” Jeonghan gets really defensive with this. He would ride for you to the ends of the world, which you do love. Just not today. 

“I don’t wanna relive that whole thing, it’s done and over. Nothing to do now,” you say, weariness seeping into your voice.

“Would you want to do anything about it?” Jeonghan asks.

“What do you mean?” You answer the question with a question.

“Like would you want to go back to when you were with Johnny?” Jeonghan asks.

You think about it for half a second. “No.” 

“That was fast,” Jeonghan comments.

“What’s there to go back to? He made his choice and I’m fine, honestly. It was weird seeing him and hearing him talk about his wedding, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought,” you say.

“Is that because of your Prince Charming?” Your best friend, always doing the most, puts this question into a sing-song voice. 

“He’s not a Prince Charming. You’re so annoying,” you scoff. 

“I don’t know, he sure seems to be saving you,” Jeonghan presses. 

“I can’t with…” you start, trailing off at the knock on your door.

“Who’s there?” Jeonghan asks. 

“No clue,” you answer, getting off your couch to go see. 

“I bet it’s Prince Charming,” Jeonghan laughs out.

“Would you fuck…” you begin as you open the door to find the very subject of your conversation on the other side, “off.”

“I’m right aren’t I?” Jeonghan is nearly shrieking with glee.

“Sorry, gotta go,” you say.

“Oh no, no, no,” Jeonghan tries.

You’re stepping aside to let Joshua into your apartment. “I’ll see you tomorrow for brunch.”

“Let me know if I need to add one more to the reservation,” Jeonghan says. 

“Goodbye,” you say with an eye roll Jeonghan can’t see, but will surely hear. You hang up as soon as he also says goodbye.

“Jeonghan?” Joshua guesses.

“Unfortunately,” you confirm. 

“I hope I wasn’t interrupting,” Joshua says. It’s nothing like when someone says it out of forced courtesy. He actually seems like he’s making sure he’s not intruding. 

“No, not at all, I just wasn’t expecting you,” you admit. 

“Sometimes that’s the best time to come over,” Joshua says with a shrug.

“Does that mean you have a plan?” you wonder.

“Yup,” Joshua says.

“Gonna tell me what it is?” you ask.

“Nope,” he says with a concerning smile, popping the end of nope. “Go put on something comfortable but with layers. And we’re not going hiking or anything like that.” 

An hour later, you’re pulling off the road in an area you’ve never been to, even with as long as you’ve lived here. The views are instantly enough to take your breath away. You can see the whole city below you, all the bustle of traffic and skyscrapers. Somewhere, you know there are people rushing to and fro, too busy to stop and appreciate what’s around them. Straight ahead, you can see the way the low clouds glide around, splitting around the very tops of the buildings. It’s beautiful and it also makes you realize just how small you are. 

While you’ve been appreciating the views in front of you, Joshua has been gathering his supplies from the trunk. By the time you turn around, he’s laying a blanket and basket down on the ground in front of the car. 

“Is this…did you set up a picnic?” you ask.

“I wanted to show you this place and figured some food might be nice,” he says with an easy smile. 

“That’s so sweet,” you say earnestly.

You settle on the blanket next to him and look through the food he’s pulling out. There are some of your favorite things and some things you’re not even sure you’ve seen before. Somehow, though, you feel like they might become some of your new favorites. He even brought plates and he sets about putting one together for you to pick at.

Joshua tells you about how this is his favorite place and he found it completely by accident. He loves being down in the city and around all the people, but there’s something nice about seeing things from this perspective too. It’s like he can just disconnect for a while. Turn off his phone. Read or listen to music. Just be totally alone. It’s how he works through a problem or gets the perspective he needs.

“I can’t believe you’re sharing it with me,” you admit and his eyes light up with his smile.

“I just thought, after last night, you might appreciate having a place to get away from it all,” Joshua says.

You want to say something, anything, really, to acknowledge what Joshua just said. Try to say something. Your throat doesn’t want to cooperate, it seems. Your brain, either. In fact, all you can manage to do is turn away to hide the tears. Joshua is observant, though. He doesn’t say anything, just pulls you into his chest and runs his hand along your back. He quietly soothes you as you cry out a lot of emotions you didn’t even realize you were experiencing. 

And something about him comforting you, this near stranger who doesn’t actually owe you anything, sets you off more. In the early days of your relationship with Johnny, you know it was good. It must have been. Surely, it was more than a relationship between two people who had known each other for years with families that were intertwined. You don’t remember it anymore. Don’t remember him ever holding you like this without even knowing what was wrong. Don’t remember him taking you on a date like this just because he thought you would enjoy it. Since you haven’t seriously dated anyone since the break-up, he also feels like your only frame of reference. That makes you sad for an entirely different reason. Who loses it over someone just being a little kind?

“I’m so sorry,” you finally say when you manage to pull yourself together. 

“For what?” he asks. 

“For just crying like that and being such a mess,” you say. 

Joshua shakes his head. Moves his hand up to your face and waits for confirmation that it’s okay. When you nod, he gently wipes the tears from under your eyes. “You have nothing to apologize for. What you’re going through with your ex, most of us could never even imagine that kind of pain.”

“But still, you barely know me and here you are trying to be kind and all I can do is cry,” you say. 

“First of all, I think last night and the food I put together show I’ve actually learned a lot about you in a short time,” he says and you have to laugh at that. He’s right. “Second, I’m just happy you feel safe enough with me to cry. It’s not healthy to hold all that in. You’re not in this alone.”

That brings you up short more than anything. He’s right, again (an annoying habit, if you’re being honest). You don’t feel any hesitation around him. Nothing to stop you from crying if you feel like crying. That’s unusual, to say the least. Normally, you’ll do anything to avoid anyone seeing you emotional. But, this man you just met is different. He’s safe. You’re not sure how or why, but you know you can trust him. 

“Are you free tomorrow for brunch?” you ask. Joshua gives you a quizzical look for a moment at the sudden topic change. 

“Yeah, why?” he asks. 

“I just need to send one quick text and then I want to do what you said you normally do here. Disconnect from the world and just appreciate the afternoon,” you say and find yourself smiling along with his smile. He really is so beautiful. 

You: add one to the reservation for brunch tomorrow and i’ll call you tonight when i’m home

You switch your phone into Do Not Disturb before the response comes and turn all your attention back to Joshua. 

Over the next couple weeks, Joshua slips seamlessly into your life and your existing friendships. Some of them, like those closest to you that come along to the Sunday brunches, know the whole story. It’s not like they would believe you had kept a relationship secret for that long, anyway. And it’s good to have a few extra sets of eyes and ears helping to sell the story. Other friends get the same story that your family and Johnny got. It’s not that you don’t trust them, you do. It’s more important to keep the circle of people who know the real story as small as possible, though, so that it actually succeeds. All your friends adore him from the second they meet him. The only surprise is how well Jeonghan seems to be adjusting to sharing your time. He wants to give you a hard time, yet he doesn’t. 

You meet all Joshua’s friends and coworkers, too. It feels way easier than it should the first time you join him and his coworkers after work for drinks. They spend most of the time giving Joshua a hard time that he’s kept you to himself for so long. It’s easy to fall into step and you find that you do know him a lot better than you think. So, it’s just as easy for you to jump in when they’re giving him a hard time. He pretends to be annoyed, but you can tell by the way he smiles that he likes it. It’s one of those genuine smiles that makes his eyes bigger and brighter. Everything just feels…easy. Like this whole thing wasn’t actually a bad idea after all. 

Your favorite part might be the first time you got with him to an Open Mic Night and get to see him play. He’s got that easy kind of confidence on the guitar. Like he knows he’s talented, but not in a cocky way. It’s his singing that catches you off guard. His voice moves over the notes with an ease that makes you wonder why this isn’t something he’s doing for a living. He’s got this way of pulling you into songs that you don’t even know. And he’s so kind with the people that show up just to see him play. They all seem just as happy to meet you and know that he’s happy. 

There’s only been one part that’s been difficult. Not difficult, exactly, but not as comfortable as some of the other things. While you and Joshua talked through anything and everything to prepare to start a fake relationship, you covered comfort levels with physical affection. You both say you’re comfortable with physical touch, though he seems to seek it out more than you do. That includes at least some level of PDA as a couple. You’ve never really been one to just randomly make out with a partner in public, but you’ve never been shy about expressing affection either. It was fine, when it was all theoretical. 

In actual practice, it’s been a little more difficult. The first time Joshua had pressed a kiss to the side of your head while you were out with people that didn’t know it was fake caught you off guard. It shouldn’t have, he asked before doing it and you confirmed it was fine. What you hadn’t been entirely prepared for was how it would feel when he did it. Or how it would feel that he was so casual about it, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Like it wasn’t making you rethink everything in your life. 

Tonight, you’re hanging out with friends at Hyejin’s house. You and her have been friends since before you even started school. So, she knows what’s really going on with Joshua. Your other friends there, though, are mostly not in on it. Which is fine. You’re shockingly comfortable with the song and dance. 

It’s not actually fine. 

It starts the same as any other time you’ve been out somewhere with him. You’re sitting close together on the couch, thighs pressed together, with his arm behind you along the back of the couch. Periodically, his fingers play with the sleeve of your shirt. It’s an absentminded habit and you’re used to it. He’s usually keeping some sort of contact with you in a very subtle way. You learned right away that he did like physical touch, but it was rarely something obvious. One drink in and his affection got a little more obvious. Arm wrapped firmly around you. More kisses pressed to the side of your head. 

Two drinks in and it changes again. He removes his arm from around you in favor of holding your hand. Playing with your fingers while he’s having other conversations, like he doesn’t even realize. Hand squeezing your thigh. Or tracing patterns into the material of your pants. Head dropping down on your shoulder when he’s not talking to someone else. And it’s definitely not fine. You’re nursing your drink, but even if you weren’t, his constant presence would sober you. Since you’ve just finally finished your first, you think maybe a second is a good idea.

It’s not. Joshua gets another drink, his third, and you decline. Instead, you stick with the water you’ve been drinking since you couldn’t even finish your second. You want to be able to respond, whatever happens. Respond to whatever new form of affection unlocks with this next drink. 

“I hope you stick around, you’re my favorite of the partners that we’ve met,” Mimi announces to Joshua when he plops back down next to you. 

You’re glad that you hadn’t taken a sip because it would’ve come out immediately. Mimi has been a friend for a long time as well, and you love her, but she doesn’t know the truth. 

“Don’t I know it,” Joshua agrees, earning a lot of laughter. 

“Have you met Johnny yet? I know you’re going to the wedding,” Taehyung wonders. 

“Yeah Johnny showed up magically the night I brought him by to meet my parents, sister, and brother-in-law,” you say, regaining some composure. 

“I think you traded up,” Joshua says, eyes laser focused on you. 

You’re not so lucky this time and you just took a sip. You nearly choke. “Do you?”

“Definitely,” Joshua insists. 

“I agree,” Jimin says and Mimi elbows him in the side. “What?”

“You’re going to the wedding,” she says. 

“So? He’s a fucking tool,” Jimin shrugs off. 

“Are you all going, then?” Joshua asks. 

“A good portion of us, yeah,” Hyejin says. “Family connections, you know?” 

“I wasn’t invited,” Mimi pouts. 

“Want to come?” Taehyung asks and Mimi laughs. 

“Tae, my love, you can’t just invite people,” Mimi says and shakes her head. 

“I have a plus-one,” Taehyung says with a shrug. “I think we all knew I wouldn’t make it to the wedding in my relationship. But, Johnny still thinks I’m bringing someone.”

“Damn, okay. I’m in,” Mimi says. 

“I’m not going either, my family ties weren’t enough to get an invite,” Jeonghan says without any sorrow in his eyes. 

“That’s because of what you said to him after the break up,” Hyejin interrupts with a laugh. 

“I don’t remember saying anything that bad,” Jeonghan shrugs, and examines his finger nails to show how little he cares. 

“Remind me to show you what he said some time, it was fucking gold,” Hyejin says to Joshua.

“Do you have it saved?” you ask.

“I should have it framed, honestly,” Hyejin says. “Get you a best friend like Jeonghan, for real, for real.” 

“Hey, that’s my best friend, get your own,” you joke. 

“That’s a shame you won’t be there though, Han, I could’ve used the familiar face,” Joshua says.

“Like you’re going to be paying attention to anyone but your date,” Hyejin teases. 

“Can you blame me? I still can’t believe how lucky I got,” Joshua says without any hint that he’s pretending. It makes your heart skip a couple beats as you try to catch your breath. 

“Ugh, I’m so single,” Mimi whines. 

“Maybe not after the wedding,” Hyejin teases. 

The conversations devolve from there into separate, smaller chats. Joshua is back to tracing patterns into your leg. Without warning, he pops his head up and places a quick peck on your lips before dropping his head onto your shoulder again. He’s so nonchalant about it that you’re not really sure it even happened. You’ve kissed a couple times like that, quick pecks in public. But, it’s always been when you’ve talked about it. It isn’t until you look up to meet Jeonghan’s eyes that you know it all really happened. 

Joshua, unaware that he’s just turned your world a little upside down, moves his head to look at you again. “You’re beautiful, you know.”

It’s barely a whisper and you know he’s not drunk. He’s not sober either, though. And you’ve had drinks around each other before. He’s just never been quite so glued to your side or free with the compliments. You’re also not usually so singularly focused on him. A fact that doesn’t go entirely unnoticed. 

“Thank you,” you whisper back. 

“I’m kinda hungry,” he continues in a bit of a whine. 

“Well you were the one who thought skipping dinner was smart,” you tease him. 

“But my little honeybunch,” he teases back. You snort and miss the way several of your friends watch the interaction because they know how you are about weird pet names. 

“Try again, sweetheart,” you answer. 

“Sweetheart, I like the way that sounds,” he says, distracted. 

“Just a little longer and we can leave and get something to eat,” you say and he sighs. 

“Fine,” he concedes and kisses your cheek, just barely a whisper away from the corner of your mouth. 

About half an hour later, you say your goodbyes. Despite your suggestions, Joshua continued drinking instead of switching to water. It’s as fine as it can be, though. He’s just an affectionate drinker. He wraps an arm around you, slipping a hand into your back pocket so that he can whisper thanks again. You do your best to shrug it off and let him drape his arms around your shoulder instead. 

The car ride is quiet, initially. You pick a playlist that he made for you after you first met. Something he seems to enjoy. You’re nearly back at his place when he says that he doesn’t have anything to eat. But, luckily, there’s a place around the corner that he loves that’s still open. He manages to place an order on the app, gets something for you as well, and pays before getting there. All you have to do is walk in. 

“I hope you’ll come in and eat with me,” he says when you get back into the car. 

You’re not really sure how to tell him that you don’t want to. Not because you don’t want to spend time with him. Or that you don’t appreciate him ordering something he knows you’ll like. No, it’s so much deeper than that. It’s that you don’t know if your heart can handle it. You’ve got a couple more weeks of this and your heart is taking a beating. All of this is fake. It’ll be over after the wedding. But, the compliments don’t feel fake. The kisses don’t feel fake. The affection doesn’t feel fake. Your heart racing is real, oh so real. You don’t need anyone to tell you that you’re in way too deep. 

None of that comes out, though. 

“Sure, sweetheart,” you say and hold your breath for a second. You hadn’t meant to say that when it was just you. 

Joshua smiles over at you. “Really do like that.” 

Does he know what he’s doing to you? Can he hear your heart hammering in your chest? Can he hear your breath catch? Does he know how insanely beautiful he is? Or that he’s all the more beautiful because he’s so unfailingly kind? 

Probably not, because he gets distracted and starts singing along as the song changes. It’s welcome, but also a little devastating. His voice cuts through you in a way you’re still very unprepared to handle.

After another few minutes, you’re at Joshua’s place. He springs back into action and tries to open your door for you, even though you’re the driver. He settles for taking hold of your hand as he walks to his door, only reluctantly dropping it when he gets to the door. 

His apartment is familiar to you, it has to be for this to be believable. So, he sets the food out and you grab plates. You grab a couple waters from the fridge while he takes the food over to the couch, bypassing the table. You sit next to him, leaving enough space between you that you’re not touching. Hoping he doesn’t think anything of it. 

It’s useless, apparently, because he slides over to press into your side.

What’s worse (not that you thought that was possible) is that he picks things off of your plate and gives you food off his plate. Tries to feed it to you, actually, and pouts when you don’t let him. It takes everything in you not to beg him to be gentle on your heart. He doesn’t even seem to realize what he’s doing to you as he smiles and jokes. Doesn’t seem to think twice about playing with your hands or his hand on your leg or any of the things he usually does when you have an audience. There’s nobody here to see and he’s not usually this touchy when you’re alone. Maybe it’s the drinks.

“I like your friends a lot, you know,” he says out of nowhere.

“They like you, too,” you assure him.

“What about you?” he asks.

“I’d assume they like me as well,” you laugh out.

“No, I meant me. Do you like me?” he asks, eyes big and vulnerable.

Please, Joshua, I’m begging you. Be gentle with me, you think so loud you’re worried he might hear.

“I’m actually a little sick of you,” you joke. 

“But, but,” he begins and dramatically throws himself in your lap. 

“You’re the worst,” you say without any bite. Your hands find their way into his hair, softly running through the strands.

“That feels nice,” he says softly. “Can I just stay like this? I’m tired.” 

“Of course,” you whisper.

“You’ll stay with me?” he asks, sounding like he’s about to drift off.

You’re sure he won’t remember any of this. Not because he’s drunk, but he’s on the edges of sleep. So, you answer in a whisper. “Always.” 

Maybe he’s not the one that needs to be careful with your heart. Maybe it’s you that needs to be careful. You know that you could walk away. That you could just remind him that this is all fake and there’s nobody around to see now. That’s not what you do. So, maybe you’re just as much to blame. 

Sunday Joshua: thanks for taking care of me last night Joshua: idk why the drinks hit me so hard Joshua: when did you leave?  Monday Joshua: is everything okay? Did i say something stupid? Tuesday Joshua: i don’t wanna sound clingy but are we still getting together at your place after work?

Somewhere, in the back of your mind, you know that you need to respond. You know that what you’re doing isn’t fair to anyone. It’s not like Joshua can somehow read your mind to realize you’re spiraling. It just feels a little paralyzing. This is a weird limbo of knowing you might be in over your head, but still believing this is all fake. 

Jeonghan: hey dummy i know you’re ignoring joshua so i’m coming over tonight  Jeonghan: i told him you’ve been busy at work and i haven’t heard from you either but we have some talking to do

Leave it to Jeonghan. You had almost forgotten, with how well you’ve gotten to know Joshua, that it was Jeonghan who introduced you in the first place. Of course he would text your best friend when he couldn’t get a hold of you. Does that make you feel better? Not really, you think, because it feels like a real relationship in a way. Oh well, you can talk about it with Jeonghan. If he shows up, that is.

And he does, less than an hour later.

“I’m here,” he announces when he comes in the door.

“Thanks for knocking and giving me the chance to pretend I’m not here,” you call back.

“Your car is outside and you have your location turned on,” Jeonghan says. 

“Right,” you answer as he comes through the hall holding a bag from your favorite take out place.

“At least I come bearing gifts,” he says.

“You’re an angel, do you know that?” you ask and reach for the bag.

Jeonghan snorts. “I’m gonna remind you of that the next time you call me a demon.” 

“Well, Lucifer was a fallen angel,” you reason with a shrug. 

“I hate you,” he says.

“I know,” you answer. 

Jeonghan busies himself with taking out the food and making sure you have napkins. Tells you what he wants to drink when you get up to go into the kitchen. Calls for you to grab some utensils as well. By the time you sit back down with him, he’s flipping through a streaming service trying to find something to watch. It’s not at all what you’re expecting and you just let it happen. The two of you have been friends long enough to know you should just let things play out.

With some mindless show on in the background, Jeonghan talks about work and your friends and everything else that’s been going on the past few days. Like it’s been weeks since you last saw him. Mostly, he talks about how Taehyung has been blowing up his phone asking for advice about Mimi, which is actually news to you. Sure, you saw him ask her if she wanted to go with him to the wedding. What you had not expected was for him to actually be interested. Which he is, if his messages to Jeonghan are anything to go by. It’s been everything from advice about talking to her to what kinds of things she might like as a surprise. They would probably be cute, you think. 

“Yeah, well, sometimes feelings catch us off guard,” Jeonghan says when you admit your surprise.

Damn. Did you really walk right into that?

“True,” you admit, knowing that’s the best answer you can give.

“Talk to me,” Jeonghan urges. 

“About what?” you ask to buy more time.

“Joshua,” he says.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you state. That makes him fix you with a look.

“Clearly there is or you wouldn’t be ignoring him,” he says. 

“We’re not really dating so I don’t owe him constant updates. I’m not ignoring him. I just have other shit to do,” you say without looking at him.

“Would you like to be?” he asks. That does make you turn to him.

“Like to be what?” you ask, though you think you know.

“Really dating him,” Jeonghan says.

It’s a crossroads kind of moment. You could say that you don’t want that. That would be a lie, though, and Jeonghan doesn’t like it when you lie. Can always tell the second you say something that’s not true. The truth is that you’ve spent nearly every moment since that stupid night at Hyejin’s place thinking about what you actually feel for your fake boyfriend. 

“I don’t…know,” you say slowly and earn a smile because it’s not a lie.

“I was there the other night too, I saw the way it all played out,” he says.

“I mean, does it matter? This is all fake and soon, it’ll be over,” you say.

“Of course it matters and it’ll be over soon? Please,” Jeonghan scoffs. “I know he’s told you that he wants to keep you in his life after Johnny’s wedding. So, what? You’re just gonna be like okay, that was fun, let’s never talk again?”

“I don’t know, maybe,” you say quietly.

He rolls his eyes. “Try again, buttercup.” 

“It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t like me like that, he’s just nice,” you say, avoidant as ever. 

“He looks at you like he’d give you the moon if you asked for it,” Jeonghan snorts out.

“He’s just nice, Han,” you disagree.

“Maybe,” your closest friend concedes, a rare move for him. It feels weird all the same. “Whatever it is, text him back. He misses you and I don’t want to hear anymore about how he’s worrying he upset you.”

“He’s been worrying that he upset me?” you ask. Your heart constricts at that.

“Yeah, for some reason he actually likes your company,” he says. “Can’t relate.”

You smack Jeonghan on the arm. “Says the man who shows up at my place unannounced when I ignore him for a day.”

“No, I was just bored,” he argued. “And you’re way too stubborn to sort out your shit on your own.”

 “I’m not stubborn, but fine, I’ll text him,” you relent.

“Now,” he says.

“What?”

“Text him now so that I know you actually did it.”

You roll your eyes at him, but pull your phone out anyway. Angling it away from Jeonghan so that he can’t see your screen. He’s such a nosy brat sometimes.

You: hey, i’m sorry. It’s been really busy and i had a lot on my mind You: wanna do something tomorrow?

The response comes right away and you ignore the smug look on Jeonghan’s face as you quickly make plans. If Jeonghan was anyone else, he would probably just let you be since he ultimately got what he wanted. But, he’s not anyone else. And he’s as caring to his friends as he is calculating when he wants something. So, he’s not doing it to be cruel, not at all. He just wants you to consider what you’re actually feeling. 

You’ll never tell Jeonghan how much you appreciate him talking everything through with you. Never tell him how good it feels to get all the thoughts out of your head. To his credit, he’s not smug and he doesn’t tell you that he’s been right about your feelings all along. He just listens, supports you when you need it, and encourages you to keep thinking through everything that’s going on.

As a make-up for slightly ignoring Joshua (over your own internal freak out), you take him to dinner at your favorite restaurant. It’s this tiny little hole-in-the-wall that people seem to walk past. The kind of place where you couldn’t overspend even if you tried because the couple that owned it just wanted to share good food. The kind of place where they know everyone by name. It makes you feel instantly at ease. 

Joshua doesn’t say it, but he also kind of can’t believe you wanted to show him some place that meant so much to you. All he could do was watch, with so much fondness, as you spoke to the couple about everything under the sun. Watch as you turned slightly red when they scolded you for taking so long to bring Joshua by. Smile as you promised the both of you would be back. Despite trying to pay, you beat him to it. Even leaving a massive tip because you insisted the couple had undercharged you. They made a big show of not wanting to take the tip and you only reminded them the cash would stay sitting on the counter. You weren’t taking it back either. 

You don’t really think about it when you take a picture of you and Joshua to upload on Instagram. At least, you try not to. Later, when you’re home and winding down for the night, you pull the picture back up. It’s amazing just how happy both of you look. You don’t need to read the comments to know that you’ve never looked so happy in your life. Every part of you wants to pull back again. It’s overwhelming. But, Jeonghan’s voice plays in your head and instead you push past. Make more plans that could break your heart. You have to just trust that he won’t. 

It isn’t until the weekend that you’re able to see him again because your schedules didn’t quite match up. That doesn’t stop him from calling you at night, though. Insisting that he wants to know how your day was, even if you can only spare a few minutes for a call. (Which never ends up being the case. You fall asleep on the phone with him twice. His voice is just so soothing when it’s all deep and soft.) 

Again, Joshua tells you the date is a surprise. He can be a little bit of a demon, when it suits him. Sure, he likes to pretend he’s not. That he’s above the chaos. Then, he does something like this and he can’t really escape it. But, he’s so sure he knows what you like that he’s positive you’ll enjoy the date. You remember how that chat had gone, too. You were ready to go to sleep, but unable to say goodnight. 

(“I have our next date planned,” Joshua says, voice soft to match the calm of the night.

“What is it?” you wonder.

“A surprise,” he answers.

“What if I don’t like it?” you ask back.

“You will,” he assures you.

“You sure seem to think you know me,” you joke. 

“Yeah, I do. Don’t worry, you’ll like this too,” he says.

There was no point in denying it. That confidence sent a bit of a shiver through you.) 

It turns out that the date is at a winery where you’re painting with wine. You have to ask him to say it again because you’ve only ever heard of wine and paint classes. Painting with wine is entirely new to you. It sounds fun, though, and you know how crafty Joshua can be, have seen all the projects around his apartment. So, even though you’re definitely not that artistic, you’re excited to see this as well. 

Admittedly, by the end of the session, your painting isn’t bad. It was a bit weird to use wine in that way, but they let you drink as well. Which makes it a lot easier to just go along with the idea of painting. Joshua’s painting, on the other hand, is beautiful. Not for the first time, you think his talents might be wasted at an office job. You’ve seen the bracelets he makes and now you’ve seen him paint. You’ve heard him sing and play the guitar. He’s impossibly artistic in a way that should make you jealous. Instead, it just makes you more endeared to him. 

You snap a picture of him and his art when he’s not looking and upload it before he can even realize it. It’s only when a notification goes off on his phone that he realizes. He doesn’t even say anything, just gets a sparkle in his eyes that makes you weary immediately. He’s busy tapping away on his own phone before a notification sounds on yours. Maybe you weren’t the only one to steal a candid shot if the picture of you laughing with a glass of wine in one hand and a paintbrush in the other is anything to go by. It’s the caption that really ruins you, though. Just a simple “think I’m addicted to her light”. It’s so simple and also so much sweeter than yours. You fight through the urge to run away. 

Which lasts until you get home from dinner. It was the perfect date, truly. Joshua always seems to know exactly how to plan out a day so everything works. After sipping wine and painting, he took you to one of his favorite restaurants. Nothing too pretentious, just kind of unassuming. The kind of place where you get good food and even better conversation. It’s (mostly) easy to keep your mind off the way your heart keeps racing.

When you’re back home, you’re not so lucky.

Back home, alone in your apartment, there aren’t any distractions. Nothing to stop your mind from all the ways that it can sabotage your own happiness. Nothing to stop you from thinking about how nobody, not even Johnny, has ever planned out such thoughtful dates for you. Nobody has ever taken the time to really know you like Joshua. Even if you won’t admit it, he knows you better than anyone you’ve ever dated. Which is terrifying, since this is all fake. And he hasn’t even known you that long. 

So, you do the rational thing and you pull back again. Answer his texts so that he doesn’t send Jeonghan over to figure out what’s wrong, but don’t make solid plans. Talk a lot about a work project that you really need to get done ahead of schedule so that you’re not stressing leading up to the wedding. And you throw in some easy suggestions in the meantime so that it still seems like you’re making an effort. 

Lunch on a work day so that it has a set ending time. Which still tugs at your heartstrings a bit because he takes a longer lunch just to meet you closer to where you work. 

An event where your parents purchased a table for charity because he’s in high demand with your family around. And he can’t be as affectionate. 

His Open Mic Nights, but with the excuse that you can’t stay too late because of your project and he should stick around with his friends. You’ll get home safely.

Small little things that keep you around him and keep up your conversations while still giving you time to breathe. You’re sure that you’re pulling it all off. And then, the wedding is around the corner. The finish line is in sight. 

You: I’m not going to the wedding You: you don’t have to come pick me up Joshua: what are you talking about? You: i’m not going Joshua: but it’s literally in a few hours? You: yeah and i don’t wanna go, so you’re off the hook You: thanks for everything, but you don’t have to pretend anymore

Even if you know you’re being a little petulant, you don’t really care. This whole thing was supposed to be about protecting your heart. Protecting your pride. Not showing up to your cheating ex-fiance's wedding alone and looking like some kind of loser. It was not supposed to be about your heart getting clobbered anyway. So, you’re doing the only logical thing you can think of. Ignoring your problems. Avoiding both the wedding and Joshua. What you’re not prepared for, though you should be, is the knock that comes at your door half an hour later. 

Joshua is on the other side of the door and your heart actually stops. He’s got his tux on and his hair styled back off his face. His eyes are soft as they take you in, noting that you have your hair and make up done. Though, you’re still in your sweats. You got at least that far before you decided this was a stupid fucking decision. 

“Can I come in?” he asks when you don’t say anything.

“Sure,” you say and step aside. 

“You look like you’re getting ready,” he comments once he’s inside.

“I was, until I texted you,” you answer. “Speaking of, why are you here?”

“Because we had plans,” he says. 

“Yeah to go see my ex-fiance marry the girl he cheated on me with. Oh, and for you to pretend to be my boyfriend so I didn’t look pathetic,” you say with a huff. 

“You’re not pathetic. He’s an asshole,” Joshua says. He doesn’t swear often, so it catches you a little off guard. 

“Well, whatever, you don’t have to go. So, I’m not really sure why you’re here,” you say. 

“You’re being so cold. What’s going on?” Joshua asks and reaches out to you. Instead, you duck away from his touch. 

“Nothing is going on. It was stupid to care what Johnny thought or to try and save face somehow,” you say. 

“It’s not stupid. He hurt you and you didn’t deserve that,” Joshua urges.

“You really don’t know me that well. Maybe I did deserve it. Maybe I was awful to him and he had no choice,” you say.

“We both know that’s not true,” he says.

“Do we?” you challenge. 

“Yes, we do,” he presses. “There is nothing you could do that justifies cheating instead of just breaking it off. But, I also know you didn’t do anything wrong. Jeonghan and I talked about it.”

“You spoke to Jeonghan about my relationship behind my back?” you question. 

“What is going on? We’ve been hanging out for weeks and getting to know each other. I just wanted to know more about someone I was going to be helping. And I like knowing you,” Joshua says and you have to look away. You don’t need the reminder of how much time you’ve spent with him.

“Yeah, sorry about all that time we wasted. I’ll pay you back for the tux or anything else you had to buy to pretend to date me,” you say and he looks genuinely confused.

“I don’t…want you to pay me back for anything. It wasn’t a waste of time. I did this because I wanted to,” he says.

“Yeah, well, you don’t have to pretend anymore because I’m not going to the stupid fucking wedding. It was a really bad idea in the first place,” you say.

Joshua clenches his jaw and looks away. Like maybe he’s frustrated. “What is going on? Do you still have feelings for him?” 

“For who? Johnny?” you ask, so insanely caught off guard that you forget you’re mad.

“Yes,” Joshua says tightly.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” you bark out.

“Well? You’re being really weird and now you don’t want to go to a wedding that we’ve been planning on,” he starts.

“Yeah, which should make you happy, since you don’t have to pretend to be my boyfriend anymore,” you say.

“Because you’re still in love with Johnny,” Joshua finishes like he hadn’t even heard you.

“Oh my god,” you nearly scream. “I’m not fucking in love with Johnny. This isn’t about him.”

“So, you don’t want to go to the wedding and it has nothing to do with him? That doesn’t make any sense,” he says. 

“No, I don’t want to keep doing this,” you say, gesturing between the two of you. “I don’t want to keep pretending to date you when I -”

You clamp your mouth shut. Unable to believe that you almost blurted out how you feel.

“When you what?” he challenges. “What? Is it that bad being around me? Is that it? Are you just sick of me? Ready to toss me aside?”

You laugh bitterly, not even able to appreciate the irony in the situation. “No, Joshua, I don’t want to toss you aside.” 

“Then, what? What am I supposed to think when you’ve been pushing me away for the last couple weeks? And I have to act like I haven’t noticed all the ways you’ve kept me at arm’s length since we went to the winery. Why did you just decide, literally today, that you don’t want to go to the wedding after all?” he asks, rambling. He’s pacing in front of you. “Why are you trying so hard to get rid of me?”

“Because I don’t want to get hurt!” you blurt out. “Because I don’t want to go to my fucking scumbag of an ex’s wedding where everyone is going to be giving me these looks of pity or focusing on my relationship with him when all I want is this.”

“This? What?” he asks, coming to a stop.

“This, Joshua, you and me. Having this just all be pretend is breaking my heart. I can’t keep doing it. It was supposed to keep me from getting my heart broken. It sucks and I hate it and I just wish it wasn’t pretend. I don’t want to go to the wedding and have you be so sweet and kind and caring when I’m going to know it has an expiration date. That it’s all just been for show,” you admit. You turn away, clutching your arms around your center because you’re so tired. And so exposed. So vulnerable. It’s awful.

The tears won’t stop, so you don’t notice how Joshua has closed the space between you until he wraps his arms around you from behind. Pulls you back against his chest and presses a kiss into your hair.

“So, let’s stop saying it’s pretend,” he whispers. 

“What?” you whisper back.

He turns you in his arms so that you’re facing him and gently brushes away the tears. “Let’s stop saying it’s fake. It doesn’t feel fake, does it?”

“No,” is all you can manage.

“So, it’s not fake and we’re not pretending,” he says.

“But,” you start to protest. 

“I knew I was in trouble, really deep trouble, as soon as we left your parents’ house. I was just waiting for you to catch up,” he says as he gently runs a thumb across your cheek to wipe away a tear . Your eyes go wide.

“That was barely a week in,” you say and he just shrugs. “And I’d dumped all my bullshit on you.”

“I think that’s actually what made me like you so much,” he says. “It was supposed to be fake and we were trying to get to know each other well enough to pull it off. But, instead, I just realized you were actually perfect.”

“Perfect? I was broken,” you joke and he shakes his head.

“No, you’ve been hurt. Who hasn’t? You’re also strong, kind, funny, a fiercely loyal friend, and one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met, inside and out,” he says. 

“That’s so, you’re so sweet,” you say and try to hide your face. He doesn’t let you. “You like me?”

“I’ve liked you the whole time. I did think it was a date, after all,” he says. “And do you think I’m that affectionate with everyone?”

“We were pretending,” you argue.

“I wasn’t,” he argues back.

“Our closest friends thought you were,” you disagree.

“And was anyone else there in my apartment when I was still being affectionate?” he asks.

“Well, no, but…” you start.

“I heard you say always,” he tells you.

“You did?” you ask, sure that it’s been your secret this whole time.

“We don’t have to go to the wedding. But, if it’s just because you don’t want this to be over with me, then it’s not going to be over. I’m yours for as long as you want me,” he says so earnestly it nearly makes you blush.

“Careful, you might get sick of me,” you joke.

He puts a finger under your chin so he can look you in the eyes. “I’ll say it again. I’m yours as long as you want me. I won’t get sick of you.” 

“I…” you start and don’t know where to go. So you do the only thing you can think of and kiss him. It’s clear he’s a little caught off guard, but he recovers quickly. His arms wrap around you to hold you tight against him. It’s the first time you’ve really kissed him and you’re so screwed because he really is perfect at this too. 

“So, do I get you for the rest of today?” he asks.

You take in his tuxedo again, for real this time. Appreciating how well it’s tailored and how amazing he looks. With a sigh, you say, “you know, it’s a shame to waste such a nice tux.”

“Are you…I thought we weren’t going,” he stutters.

“I’m probably gonna have to fix my makeup in the car, but why not? I want to show off my super hot and very real boyfriend,” you say and watch him choke on air. 

“You can’t just say…” he starts.

“Damn, sick of me already?” you tease.

“You know I’m not,” he answers and moves to follow you.

“No, no. You don’t get to see me changing. I’ll be back out in a second,” you say. 

You’re in the middle of shimmying into your dress when you realize that you do still have a lot to talk about. A lot to figure out. This whole situation has been unusual, though, so it probably makes sense that there isn’t a template. Once you have your shoes on, you walk back into the living room, prepared to say something, only to find Joshua speechless.

“You look…” he starts.

“You’ve seen the dress already,” you say and smile.

“Not on you. Not in person. You look amazing,” he says and crosses to pull you into his arms. “Are you sure we have to go?”

“Yes,” you say and swat him. “But, I do know we have a lot to talk about.”

“I’m not in a rush,” he says and allows you to step away.

“We might need to be in a bit of a rush,” you say, checking the time and gathering all your things. 

“Let’s go, then,” Joshua says and offers his arm. 

The wedding passes in kind of a blur. In truth, you barely even register Johnny or what he’s doing beyond the actual ceremony. The reception is so massive that it’s easiest just to focus on the people around you. Especially when you’re at a table with your friends. Thankfully, you’re not at a table with your parents or your sister. It does mean, though, that you’re sitting next to Hyejin, who has definitely realized that something shifted between you and Joshua. So, she’s trying to sneak in a question any time she can. Which is hard, given that Joshua is more attached to you than ever. And Hyejin doesn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to you. All you manage to let her know is that it’s real now and that you’ll fill her in after the wedding. (You’re also thankful that people seem to be cooing over Taehyung and Mimi since they’re the shiny new topic.)

It’s also nice to have Joshua there because he’s a built in way to excuse yourself from any conversation that you don’t want to be part of. It’s easy to just say you’re going to go back to the table. Or, in the case of a good song coming on, he’ll be quick to drag you to the dance floor and away from whatever conversation you’re stuck in. He’s a good dancer, too. You don’t miss the way Hyejin catches your eye when the first slow song comes on and he pulls you close to him. But, that’s a conversation for another day. All you wanted was to appreciate the way his hand felt on your lower back or your hand felt in his. 

When it was finally time to leave, Joshua led you out of the event, arm around you to guide you. Neither of you were drunk, but you had still hired someone to take you to and from the wedding anyway. A gift from your parents to appreciate you “doing the right thing” and coming to the wedding. For the sake of the families. It made you roll your eyes at the time, yet you’re thankful now. It would be far better than having to take an Uber or trying to get a room at the hotel (and risking seeing everyone else staying there the next morning). The ride home also gave you the chance to talk. Really talk. Neither of you cared much that someone else was driving (and he had the partition up, anyway), as you talked about your feelings honestly for the first time. 

As it turned out, you had a lot to say. Both of you. You hadn’t been nearly as good at hiding your feelings from Joshua as you had been at hiding them from yourself. He had hoped you were going to admit them to him after that night at his apartment. Instead, you avoided him. Yes, he knew that you had been avoiding him. You also weren’t very good at picking up on the signs he dropped about his feelings for you. He admitted that he could have just said something, but he was trying to be subtle so he didn’t scare you off. Trying to let his actions speak through more affection. You admit you were scared to think it was anything more than it actually was. Scared of your feelings. Scared of getting hurt again. Joshua completely understands that and admits that he’s a little scared, too, because you’re definitely more important to him than he was anticipating. He’s also confident that you can work through it together. It gives you a feeling of hope. Makes everything about you feel lighter. You see that relief reflected in Joshua’s eyes when they scan yours. 

The car pulls to a stop and he gets out first. He holds his hand out to help you out of the car. You’re not really sure what comes over you.

“Come up with me,” you ask, but it’s more of a statement. 

He hesitates, conflicted. “I don’t know if I should.”

“Why?” you ask, clearly confused.

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to leave,” he answers and you smile.

“Then stay,” you shrug, “at least for breakfast.” 

Without waiting for him to respond, you turn and head for the front door of the building. It means you miss the way he freezes in place, but you can guess at that by how long it takes before he catches up to you. He’s unusually quiet and still beside you as you go up the elevator and then behind you as you unlock the door. 

“I’m gonna go change,” you announce after you drop your keys by the door. You look back at Joshua, appreciating him in the tuxedo one last time. “I’ve got some clothes in the spare room that should fit. They’re Jeonghan’s ” 

You take the opportunity to breathe for a second, to let it settle in that you asked Joshua to come in with you and stay the night. Then, you set about changing out of your dress. Carefully clean your face free of the make-up. Brush through your hair and twist it back off of your face. Once you’re in comfy clothes and bare faced, you head back out into the living room. It’s odd that you don’t even feel self-conscious about Joshua seeing you like this, you’re instantly comfortable. 

Joshua’s back is to you in the kitchen. When he turns around, you see that he’s put together a little platter of snacks. You also were right, the t-shirt and shorts he picked out seem to fit him well. Jeonghan is a little slighter than Joshua, but he wears most of his clothes on the baggier side. 

“Thanks for the clothes,” he says when you both meet on the couch. “I was worried when you said you had spare clothes they were gonna be from an ex or Johnny or something.” 

Your laugh is sudden and clearly catches Joshua off guard. “I wouldn’t have kept any of Johnny’s clothes. I gave them all to charity.” 

“I’m sure he was thrilled with that,” Joshua laughs.

“They made a killing reselling them,” you laugh in response. “Wanna watch something?”

“Sure, you pick,” he says.

You start clicking through your saved list to find something that the two of you can watch. Once you settle on something, Joshua motions you over. Even if you want to pretend you’re considering it, you can’t. Every part of you wants to be close to him. When you slide over, he pulls you in tighter to his body and you fit like you always belonged there with him. 

If you thought he was physically affectionate when he was pretending, it’s nothing compared to now that he knows you’re both in this. He has one hand running along your arm or the other along your thigh. Sometimes he reaches out to take one of your hands. Other times he presses kisses into your hair. It’s pretty clear right away that he’s not paying much attention to the show. 

If you’re being honest, you’re not really either.

Everything is distracting. The way his fingers on the bare skin of your arm raises goosebumps. The way his kiss in your hair makes your eyes close in appreciation. The way he squeezes your thigh and short circuits your brain. 

You can’t help it. You turn your head so that you can look at him. He caresses your cheek, so gentle. Runs his thumb across your lip. You’re holding your breath, just waiting to see what he’s going to do. When you feel like you’re going to go a little bit insane, his hand moves to the back of your neck and pulls you in. It’s exactly like the first kiss before the wedding. At least, at first. It’s gentle, but full of so much desire. It’s also slow, like there’s no rush to any of it.

The position is really uncomfortable, though. You shift your legs so they’re draped over one of Joshua’s. He doesn’t miss a beat. It just allows him to pull you closer. There’s something incredibly intimate in kissing him like this. There’s this weird contrast of desire and comfort. It’s heated, but also a little lazy. Like you have all the time in the world. Which you do, you think, now that you’re being honest about your feelings.  When Joshua pulls back from the kiss, you chase his lips for a second before realizing that he’s pulled away. The way he looks at you nearly melts you into the couch.

“I don’t want to assume where this is headed, but maybe we should take it to the bedroom?” he asks. It’s cute, the way he’s a little shy. Like you didn’t invite him in to spend the night. Yeah, you’re in way over your head. At least it seems like he might be too. 

You pull your legs back so that you can stand up. His eyes track your movements as you reach your hand back to him. He accepts it without a word and lets you lead him to the bedroom. Even if he’s seen your bedroom before, this feels different. You’re waiting for him to look around, but his eyes are glued on you. Joshua even waits for you to lead him all the way to the bed, so you direct him to sit on the edge. 

Once Joshua is seated, you step between his legs and tilt your head down to kiss him. He wraps his arms around you so that he can pull you against him. There’s barely any space between you. It sends a little bit of a shiver as his hands run up your back and back down. The touch is gentle and caring. Like he’s trying to put everything he feels into it. Something about it just makes you feel so insanely safe. 

He’s the one to break the kiss again, but this time it’s to move back onto the bed and grab your hand to pull you along with him. It’s easy to just follow suit and get comfortable laying next to him, bodies facing each other. The kissing picks up when your lips meet again. Joshua kisses you breathless with a passion you’re eager to explore. One of his hands rests on your hip, casually sliding beneath your shirt and caressing up your side. You press your body further into his and capture his moan with a kiss. It feels like you’re a bit drunk off each other.

When Joshua’s hand moves back down, you take the chance to throw your leg over his hip, allowing you to press further into him and feel how this is turning him on. Part of you knows that he’s still waiting for you to set the pace. Or that he wants things to be a little slower. So, you help him out and roll the two of you over so that you’re straddled on top of him. Putting his hands on your hips, you lean over to kiss him again. In this position, you can also grind into his lap. You delight in how he’s already getting hard beneath you, enjoy the way his hands grip the soft flesh of your hips.

He pulls back and looks at you with blown pupils. “Baby, please don’t tease me.” 

“No silly pet name?” you tease him. 

“Not when you’re getting me this turned on like a horny teenager,” he whines. 

“You mean like this?” you ask, injecting as much innocence as you can when you slowly drag your clothed pussy across his dick again. 

Joshua throws his head back, eyes squeezed shut, and grips you tighter. “Yes.” 

“So you don’t like it?” you ask, grinding a little more. 

“Fuck,” he hisses out. And somehow that’s the thing that almost breaks you. Why is that one swear so hot on his lips? 

Without saying anything, you sit up a little bit, still making sure you’re straddling Joshua, so that you can pull his shirt off him. Your eyes go wide because you’ve never seen him shirtless. You’ve seen him in well fitted suits or shirts, but this is entirely different. His chest looks like it was sculpted by an artist. All your attention is on your fingers running along his chest and you don’t see the way it makes him a little shy. 

His hands reach for your own shirt, playing with the hem like he’s asking permission. So, you move his hands aside and pull it over your head, leaving your skin bare as well. You watch him drink you in, feeling almost empowered by the desire you see in his eyes. He pulls you back towards him so that he can get one of your breasts into his mouth. The way he teases your nipple with his tongue has you clenching around nothing. You can feel how wet it’s making you and try your best not to squirm when he moves from one breast to the other. 

“I need you,” you utter. 

“I need you, too,” he says against your skin. His hips buck up into you almost involuntarily. 

You slide off of him and pull your shorts down and he gasps that you don’t have any underwear on. It isn’t like you were expecting anything, you just wanted to be prepared. While he’s still a little drunk on the sight of you fully naked, you help him discard the rest of his clothing. The sight of his cock springing free, precum leaking out, has you wanting to get your mouth on him. 

But, you’re realizing, what you really want is to feel him inside you. After so much tension and wondering, you just want to have this moment together. You want to be as close as two people can possibly get. You want all the intimacy and to be able to see his face. It’s this thought that pushes you back to the bed to lay with him. 

Joshua repositions and runs a hand down your body. Lets his fingers run along your thighs and tease their way up to gather some of your wetness. Your eyes close as he runs a finger up your slit. It’s such a little amount of contact and it makes you moan anyway. 

“Damn, are you this wet just for me?” he asks and presses a kiss into the first bit of your skin he can reach.

“I want to feel you,” you admit. Joshua makes you press a finger into your pussy, but you stop him. Confusion takes over his features.

“I thought…do you not want this?” he asks. 

“I do, but I want…I want all of you,” you admit. “I want to feel you deep inside of me. I want to be completely ruined by you. I want to come together.” 

“Shit,” he hisses, hand stilling against your body. “On one condition.”

“What’s that?” you ask.

“I want to taste you soon,” he says, pressing a kiss into your shoulder.

The thought of him between your legs makes you shiver. It’s almost enough to forget that you want this first time to be together. “Deal.” 

“Do you have condoms? I wasn’t exactly expecting…” he says, trailing off.

“That drawer,” you say and point. 

He rolls himself off of the bed to open the drawer. You’re not sure why you expect his hands to be a little unsteady when he rips open the wrapper and rolls it onto himself, but he’s so calm. Maybe it’s just you that’s a little nervous. At least, that’s what you think until you catch the look on his face. It has to be the same as yours, naked want mixed with a little bit of uncertainty. Everything else has been so easy with you, what if this is where it goes wrong? 

“Just lay back,” he urges you, voice calming any lingering nerves. His voice drops to a whisper, like the next statement is just for him. “You’re so beautiful, every single inch of you.” 

It makes your heart constrict in a way that you’re not really prepared for. It would be nice if your feelings could stop flooding in all at once like a dam breaking. It’s overwhelming. You do as he says, though, and lean back against the pillow. Joshua gently spreads your legs apart and takes another moment to appreciate you. He can’t seem to help himself from running a finger along your entrance. 

Even though he would fully be within his rights to tease you, he doesn’t. He lines himself up at your entrance and looks to you for final confirmation. All you can manage is a nod. You know he wants to hear you, but you can’t bring yourself to form the words. So, he accepts the nods and slowly presses into you.

“Fuck,” you hiss as you adjust to him. 

“Are you okay?” he worries.

“Feels good,” you say with a slight whine. “It’s just been a bit.” 

He presses the rest of the way into you and then stills so you can get used to him. It’s really overwhelming. Not just because you’re finally feeling him inside of you. More so because he’s looking at you with more adoration than you’ve ever felt in your life. Like this is it for him. Like you’re it for him. It’s too early to be thinking of love, but you really don’t know if anyone has ever loved you so completely. You think he’s probably it for you too. 

Once he finally starts to move, you know it’s going to be over entirely too fast. He starts with slow thrusts, testing what you want. You dig your fingers into his arms as a way to ground yourself. To anchor yourself to him and in the moment. When he picks up the pace, your mind goes entirely blank. It’s just the right speed. While you love the hard and fast fucking, there’s something so much more intimate about this kind of in between speed. 

“God you feel so good,” he whines as he snaps into you again. “So tight and perfect.” 

“You’re so - oh my god,” you moan out, unable to finish the sentence as he hits you just right. 

Joshua moves one of your legs so that it’s over his shoulder and presses further into you, hitting deeper than you were prepared for.

“Fuck, Joshua, holy shit,” you scream out. 

“Love the sound of my name on your lips,” he manages as his thrusts pick up pace. 

You want to respond that you love saying it, want to say anything, but the thrusts are entirely too much. As if it wasn’t already too much, Joshua adjusts again so that he can press his thumb against your clit. He rubs circles in time with his thrusts and you think that you might see stars. You throw your head back, eyes pressed shut.

“Look at me, baby. I wanna see you when you come,” he urges, his own voice sounding ragged. 

Despite wanting to focus on the pressure building between you, you do as he asks. Your eyes meet his and it’s that look that makes that coil snap. You’re coming hard and digging your fingers into whatever you can find to release some of the tension in your body. This might be the best orgasm you’ve had. 

When you come back to this plane, Joshua has stilled inside of you. One of his hands gently caresses your face as he mumbles quiet praises. It’s so impossibly tender.

“It’s okay, sweetheart, you can move,” you assure him.

“Thank fuck,” he mumbles. 

His pace now picks up to something fast and hard with one of his large hands anchoring your thigh to his body. Your hands grip any part of his body that they can reach and you relish the way he hisses when your nails drag patterns down his skin. Marking him so that he belongs to you. Just as you belong so completely to him. 

It seems impossible but you can feel the tension building low in your stomach again. His thrusts are so hard that you feel like his cock might split you open and something about it just works for you. You hadn’t thought anything about him would translate to this kind of hard and fast sex, but it’s somehow better than you could have imagined. With him so focused on chasing his own high, you rub circles on your clit to bring yourself over the edge again. You tumble over the edge for a second time just as Joshua’s thrusts get erratic. You do your best to take over the rhythm before slowing down. 

Joshua collapses on top of you, cock still buried in your pussy, and sighs. His weight on top of you feels like the best security you’ve ever had. Your hands find their way into his hair, gently stroking and scratching his scalp. As he comes back around, he presses his head further into your hand. 

“Hey,” you say when he looks up at you.

“You’re perfect,” he responds and you can’t keep the smile off your face. 

“You were pretty perfect yourself,” you say. 

“Am I too heavy, I could…” he starts and you pull him tighter against you.

“Don’t you dare,” you warn. 

He doesn’t say anything, just nuzzles his face into your neck. But, you know that you can’t stay like this forever. So you don’t protest when he gently pulls himself up and gets out of the bed. You’re right behind him, leading him into the bathroom so that you can get both of you cleaned up. 

After getting cleaned up, dressed, and doing your respective night time routines, you and Joshua are settled back into your bed (on top of a fresh set of sheets). Although you’ve never been much for falling asleep cuddling, you can’t imagine leaving any space between you and him. When he wraps himself around you, all you can do is smile and settle deeper into his perfect chest. Honestly, every inch of this man is perfect and you’d be annoyed if you weren’t so helplessly attached to him. 

And it’s the best sleep you’ve gotten in a long time. You wake up with his chest pressed into your back and his arm still wrapped around you. It sounds like he’s still asleep based on his breathing and so you’re just considering slipping out of the bed. He moves in his sleep and pulls you tighter against him, making you feel that he’s semi-hard again. You press back against him, almost testing if he’s really asleep. 

He’s not. 

Joshua’s hand, already against the skin of your stomach and underneath your shirt, moves further up to your breast. His hand squeezes your breast and then he brushes his thumb over your nipple. Your body responds to his touch embarrassingly fast, which only seems to spur him on. He’s got your nipple between his fingers before you press back into him again, wiggling your ass against his dick without pretending you’re doing otherwise.

“Good morning beautiful,” Joshua says in a raspy voice into your ear. 

The warmth of his breath along with the pressure of him rolling your nipple between his thumb and forefinger has you suppressing a moan. In the quiet of the morning, he hears it anyway. He removes his hand from your breast and you want to pout at the loss of contact. That is, until his hand works down between your legs, roughly grabbing hold of your pussy through your shorts. He runs his middle finger through your folds, likely feeling the way your shorts are getting soaked through already. 

“Feels like someone might have woken up ready,” he says into your ear, voice sinfully low. His finger is still slowly teasing you through the damn material of your shorts. Somehow that makes it feel hotter. 

“I wonder why,” you retort, undermined by the way you squirm under his touch. 

“Do you want me to stop?” he asks and stops his movements. 

Your hand immediately moves to his. To guide him back to your cunt. “Please don’t. Want to see what those hands can do.” 

His mouth is still by your ear, so you hear the dark chuckle and feel the air tickle you. He moves your hand aside along with your shorts as he slips his hand inside the fabric. His middle finger resumes the previous pattern almost lazily. You’re about to ask him to stop teasing you when he presses a finger inside you suddenly.

“Fuck,” you nearly scream. 

“Is someone a little sensitive?” he teases. He’s a fucking demon and you would gladly sell your soul so he didn’t stop. 

The way he pumps his finger inside of you is entirely too slow. But, when you try to meet his rhythm, he stops. Just when you think you might actually die, he inserts a second finger. It makes your back arch, pressing your ass further against his now very hard cock. He hisses and pulls his fingers out from you. As you’re turning over to adjust your position, you see him insert his fingers into his mouth. Holy shit. He really is the hottest man you’ve ever met. 

Instead of letting you carry on in any way, he pushes himself up and repositions. You’re not really sure what he’s doing until he reaches for your shorts to pull them off. His focus is on you, silently asking for permission again. All you can do is nod. 

“Told you that I wanted to taste you,” he reminds you once your shorts are off. 

“Are you sure…” you start to ask before he cuts you off.

His head snaps up so he can meet your eyes. “I’ve been waiting to taste you for weeks.”

That shuts you up pretty effectively. What can you really say in response to that? Anything you might have said dies in your throat as he licks a messy stripe up your folds. He quickly settles, using one hand to keep you spread open for him, and licks into you. It’s all you can do to keep your eyes on him as his head bobs between your legs. You thread your fingers through his hair to keep him in place even though you know he’s not going anywhere. (And okay, maybe it’s more to ground yourself to him than anything else.) 

It shouldn’t be surprising that his attentiveness translates this well, but it is a little surprising how well he seems to know your body. The way he knows just when to switch from licking into your cunt to flicking his tongue over your clit. The way he knows when he needs to add a finger and then a second. The way he can tell everything your body needs before you even realize it. 

By the time he pulls himself up your body, he’s got you nearly panting from the build up. The kiss he presses to your lips is sloppy and a little desperate. Like you’re both totally fucked out. His fingers inside you keep a relentless pace as he hooks them, hitting that perfect spot. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you yell out, breaking the kiss. Your whole body feels like it’s on fire in an entirely different way from the night before. 

There’s nothing in the world but Joshua and the way he coaxes everything out of you. The way he has you squirting on his fingers. You’re not even sure if the praise coming out of your mouth makes any sense and you’re definitely not sure what he says in return. It’s all you can do just to appreciate the moment. 

You think that you’re going to get the chance to get your mouth around his cock now that he’s given you another mind blowing orgasm. But, by the time you get your breathing under control, you see that he’s rolling a condom from your drawer onto himself. He pulls you to the edge of the bed so that your legs are hanging off. It’s instantly stronger than you’re expecting from him and pulls a gasp from you. 

Without even thinking, your legs fall open. Joshua seems to have found a bottle of lube, too, and spreads it over his cock. When he lines himself up at your entrance, you expect him to ease in like the night before. He doesn’t. He snaps his full length inside of you in one motion and you’re so overstimulated, but it feels so good.

“Fuck me, Joshua, oh my fucking god,” you say and clench down around his dick. 

“Shit, that feels so good,” he hisses. 

“You feel so good,” you moan. 

“You have no idea,” he answers and starts thrusting. 

It’s a complete haze from the moment you hear his skin slap against your own. Every coherent thought leaves your head. There is nothing in the world but you and him and the way you make each other feel. He leans over your body, crowds your space. Steals sloppy, desperate kisses. Praises you constantly and in broken sentences. It’s all you can do just to hold on, so sore and so unable to stop.

Your hands grip into the sheets around you that are completely rumpled. You try everything to keep your eyes on Joshua’s face. Memorize the way he looks when he’s concentrating. Appreciate how totally gone he is because you’re sure it’s the same look you have. Delight in the way his eyes get even wider when you clench your pussy around him. 

It feels a little like he’s using your body to chase his own high, except there’s total comfort in that. All you want is for him to feel as good as you do. All you want is for him to get that release, especially since you haven’t been able to get your mouth on his cock yet. 

“Harder Joshua, please. I know you’re close,”  you beg and he obliges immediately. 

Even though you’re trying to meet the rhythm, you can’t. It’s too erratic and too unpredictable. So you pull him down to you again and kiss him. Slip your tongue inside his mouth and let the kisses get as sloppy as they need to. You feel how close he is and only kiss him harder. He breaks the kiss for the last few thrusts, groaning as he comes. You’re right there with him. 

(Later, he tells you that he’s never seen anyone hotter than you when you come. It would make you embarrassed in any other situation. But, you realize that you’ve never been with anyone that’s come close to him, so maybe it’s okay to accept his praise. Maybe you deserve it. Maybe this is the person that you’ve been waiting for.)

Now, you really do have to get up and clean up. As tempting as Joshua’s offer to shower together is, you don’t want it to turn into shower sex because that’s just not sexy (or practical). Neither one of you can seem to guarantee keeping their hands off the other. Instead, you tell him that he can use the shower in your guest room. It’s fully stocked and there are still more spare clothes in there. He insists that he should get some laundry going because you must be running out of clean sheets and you definitely made a mess. 

With Joshua cleaning up some around the house, you’re the first out of the shower and dressed. Pleasantly sore in the kind of way you really enjoy. You’re sitting on the couch and scrolling through your phone, trying to decide if you want to order food or just cook what you already have. Before you can make a decision, there’s a knock at the door. It’s impossible to guess who it could be. Even Jeonghan wouldn’t bother you like this. Although he’s been texting asking for an update after you told him you finally got your shit together, he wouldn’t show up like this. 

When you open the door, you’d give anything for it to just be Jeonghan. Instead, you see a face that you’ve been seeing entirely too much lately.

“What are you doing here, Johnny?” you ask with a heavy sigh. 

“I need to talk to you,” he says.

“Why?” you ask.

“Come on, don’t be like that,” he pleads.

“Johnny, it’s the day after your wedding. What the fuck are you doing on my doorstep?” you ask, arms crossed. 

“Are you really going to make me do this in the hallway?” he asks. 

“I don’t see any reason to invite you inside,” you retort. 

“It’s about your, uh, boyfriend,” Johnny says a little awkwardly.

“Joshua?” you ask because that actually piques your interest a bit.

“Can I come in?” he asks.

“No. What about Joshua?” you ask.

“This is really awkward. It would be better if we were sitting down…” Johnny starts.

“My little honeybun, is everything okay?” Joshua asks from inside the apartment. He must be out of the shower. 

“Babe, we talked about the pet names,” you remind him as he joins you at the door.

“Oh, uh, I wasn’t expecting him to be here,” Johnny says.

“I’m her boyfriend, so I know why I’m here. What are you doing here?” Joshua says without hiding any disdain.  "Are you really her boyfriend, though?" Johnny challenges. You stiffen almost imperceptibly, but Joshua must notice it because he wraps an arm around you protectively. "Of course I am. Why are you here?"

“I needed to talk to her,” Johnny says stiffly.

“About you, apparently,” you say with your eyes on Joshua. 

“Right, so can you give us a minute?” Johnny asks with his eyes on Joshua.

“No, he can’t. If you have something to say, just say it. Then you can leave us alone,” you say.

“Fine, if you really want it to be like this, fine,” Johnny says. “I knew he looked familiar when I saw him at your parents’ house with you. It just took me a while. I ran into him at a couple of functions back when I was in college and traveling all around for my dad.” 

“Okay? And? I’m sorry, but I’m not sure why I care,” you say even though you know where he’s going.

“He was always with older women,” Johnny presses. 

“Can you just make your point so we can get back to our day?” Joshua asks.

“Fine,” Johnny says, irritated. “The whispers were that women paid him to come to the events with them. That he was selling himself to them.” 

You actually snort at the phrasing. It takes you several seconds to compose yourself. You wonder what the point of Johnny doing this and if it’s his way of trying to keep you on the hook. Then you realize that you don’t really care what he does. For the first time in forever, you’re genuinely happy. 

“I’m glad you think this is funny,” Johnny says. 

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I know how Joshua helped pay for his education. And like why am I going to give him a hard time over seizing an opportunity? There’s nothing wrong with profiting off of someone wanting his company platonically,” you say. 

“You’re assuming he wasn’t also sleeping with them,” Johnny says, a little stubborn.

“No, I’m not assuming. I know he wasn’t because we’ve talked about this. He told me all about it without even being prompted. And unlike certain people in my life, I have absolutely no reason to doubt him. I know I can actually trust him,” you say. “It was also years before we met. We’ve all got history.”

“Nice dig,” he says. 

“It’s not a dig, Johnny. Not everything is a slight,” you say with a sigh. “Where does Gabby think you are?”

“What?” Johnny asks. 

“Your wife,” you clarify. “Where does she think you are?”

“Oh, well, that’s not important. I just said I had some errands to take care of,” Johnny says and you roll your eyes.

“We’re done, Johnny,” you say.

“Wait,” he says as you’re moving to shut the door. “I know I fucked up, but…”

“There’s no buts. Not anymore,” you say. “Maybe there was a point where I’d want to hear the buts and the apologies and all that. I’m happy now, though, and you can’t even tell your wife that you came to see your ex-fiancee the day after your wedding.” 

“It’s not like…” he starts and you start to close the door at the same time.

“It’s exactly like that. Goodbye, Johnny,” you say. 

The second you close the door, you feel a giant weight lifted off you. You just feel tired. It’s obvious that there aren’t any feelings there anymore, so him pretending he cares as a pretense to see you just feels irritating.

“Are you okay?” Joshua asks, eyes raking over you.

“Yeah, I’m good,” you say.

“You sure?” he asks.

“Yeah, really. I think I knew when I saw him at my parents’ house that time you came over for dinner that I was completely over it,” you say. “I’m sorry he tried to bring something like that up or make it a big deal.” 

“I don’t care. It’s like you said, I did it and I’m not ashamed of that,” he says. “But, uh, I really wanted to thank you.”

“For what?” you ask.

“For defending me and for saying you trust me,” he says. It makes you a little shy for a second, so you look down.

“Oh, well, it’s not a big deal,” you say. 

Joshua closes the space and tilts your chin up to look at him. “It’s a huge deal to me. I know we started pretending, but trusting me means the absolute world.” 

“You make it easy,” you admit. 

That seems to render him a little speechless as well because all he does is pull you into him in the tightest hug he’s ever given you. Your body fits into his like a puzzle piece. Which sounds sappy, even if in your head, and you don’t actually care. It’s the safest and the happiest you’ve ever felt.

“What?” he asks when you pull away.

“Nothing, I just think this is going to work,” you say. 

Joshua smiles at you, that genuine smile he saves for when he’s at his happiest. “Yeah, I think so too.” 

i hope you enjoyed this fic! let me know your thoughts 💕

tag list: @aaniag, @gyuminusone, @crepecakeu, @tinyelfperson, @dokyeomkyeom, @amoryeonjun, @miriamxsworld, @hongrizoon, @klecksstorys, @sunflowergyeomie, @straykidswhoo789, @holistic, @vanishingboots, @babybae-shisui, @matchahyuck, @sonybear40, @kimseokgen, @hyneyedfiz, @miujunhui, @graybaeismytae, @hyucksrealm, @livixxn, @sharonxdevi, @coupsystar8, @sana-is-ms-rmty, @pyeonghongrie-main, @naajaeminsgf, @beomesbabe, @magicshop913, @deletingthekisses, @lissiesykes (strikethrough means i couldn't tag, check your settings!)

[every-aj-needs-an-angel]

Okay this one's been stuck in my head all day but I have absolutely time to write it so please share this vision with me

Try as they might, Steve and Robin couldn't get tickets to Chrissy Cunningham's arena tour, but they could get tickets to a festival she was playing.

The last thing Steve ever wanted to do was go and stand in a muddy field for sixteen hours while they waited for the headline act. But he was pretty sure Robin was in love with her favourite musician, and he wasn't about to deny his best friend a chance at love.

So he helped her make personalised t-shirts because honestly all the other bands in the line-up kinda sounded like they sucked.

His read, "Only Here for Chrissy" on the front and "I'm Steve" on the back and Robin's read "Chrissy, Will You Be My Girlfriend?" on the front and "If Lost, Please Return To Steve" on the back.

And it turned out, as they stood against the barrier in a not so muddy field, on a lovely, warm, but overcast, May day, that even bands that sucked could be fun. Even if it was only because they spent their day with earplugs in, so their eardrums wouldn't combust, bitching about each artist's lack of ability to put notes or an outfit together.

During the lunchtime intermission, the pair made friends with the lesbian couple next to them, Kayla and Jess, who were also eagerly awaiting Chrissy's set and similarly liked to mock those who committed crimes against sound and fashion. Steve was glad to have met them, they were really nice, and he felt better about leaving her to use the bathroom or to fetch food, knowing Robin was in safe hands.

He also felt better about letting her wander off, not that it stopped him from stressing out when she and Kayla had been missing for over fifteen minutes. He spread himself out to keep their places against the railing with his back to the stage, watching the crowd intently. Jess wasn't quite as chatty once they were alone, but she seemed content enough, bobbing along to the band that'd appeared on the stage.

Steve didn't turn back around to face the stage until he spotted the girls heading back towards them, he gave them a wave and turned around to look at the guys who hadn't been attempting to destroy anyone's hearing and was met with the face of the most gorgeous man he'd ever seen. Pretty face, long curly hair tied up in a bun, muscle tee showing off his many tattoos, piercings and chains and glittery Docs; Steve felt himself owl blink and blush.

God's gift to mankind was kneeling centre stage, guitar in hand making the most beautiful sounds Steve had ever heard as his fingers flew over the strings, and it was only when the rest of the band kicked back in that the man looked up, winked directly at Steve, and then jumped back to his feet, spending the rest of the song bouncing around the stage.

Steve only realised his mouth was agape when Robin finally arrived next to him and elbowed him hard in the ribs, giving him the same look she did whenever he was embarrassing in the club. He watched the rest of the Corroded Coffin, according to the backdrop, set in awe. Screaming and clapping along when they wished everyone a great day, throwing picks and drumsticks into the crowd and taking a bow; patting each other on the back as they wandered offstage.

As soon as it was quiet again, Robin wanted to know what the hell was wrong with his face and honestly, he couldn't answer her. He didn't even believe in love, not for himself at least, and he certainly didn't believe in love at first sight. It didn't stop him from spending the next couple of hours watching the faces at the sides of the stage, hoping to catch a glimpse of his new favourite guitarist, though.

As soon as Chrissy hit the stage, Steve got lost, between filming the set and watching Robin trying not to hyperventilate when Chrissy spotted her t-shirt, pointed to her, and giving her a coy little wink, blew her a kiss.

"An old school friend is here with me tonight, and I'd like him to help me out with this next track. Especially for the beauty in the front row, this is Girlfriend!"

The crowd went wild as the beat kicked in, but Steve was still watching Robin because it looked like she'd stopped breathing altogether. That was until she gasped loudly and started smacking Steve in the way she always did whenever she got overly excited; pointing wildly at the stage, and it was only when he looked over he saw Corroded Coffins guitarist bouncing up and down next to Chrissy.

Instead of the black muscle vest and skinny jeans he'd been sporting earlier in the day, he had changed into pale blue board shorts and a baggy white t-shirt that read "Hey Steve!" written in black sharpie with a giant winking smiley face underneath that could only really be seen when he swung his guitar around his back to copy Chrissy's dance moves.

The song ended, and the friends hugged, Chrissy waving him off the stage and calling out, "Eddie Munson everybody!" letting the crowd go wild for her friend before launching into the rest of her set.

By the time Chrissy had actually left the stage, Robin looked exhausted, having screamed and sung and danced herself out. They hung around a bit, said goodbye to Kayla and Jess, wishing them a safe journey home, and they were just taking one last look at the now empty stage when he heard someone yell his name...

[ladyelissarose]

‘Stop Thinking!’

Miguel O’Hara x girlfriend reader

Warnings; 4K!!! NSFW, smut. Very fluffy- Like fluffy overload. Soft Miguel. I feel like he would be such a soft and sweet person while off-work. (Like look at how sweet he was with Gabriella) anyways. Enjoy y’all!


Author’s note: so this is my first time writing smut. I have no experience in this area of writing. But I wanted to try something new for y’all. So far I’ve been learning from all the amazing smut fics I’ve read. (There are some great ones out there!!) So please, I’m willing to take some word from y’all if y’all like or see something that is fixable! Likes and reblogs are much appreciated- much love y’all! message me if you’ll like to mention something in private;)




“Oh!- Miguelll. Ah! That’s tickles.”


You let out a soft giggle as Miguel laid on top of you in bed, at your shared apartment, kissing your soft stomach wherever he pleased. You both decided to take the day off, (more like you pushed him to finally agree because you saw how exhausted he was) after being stressed out and running on 24 back to back shifts all to protect the spider-universes.

Jess and Peter B. had it in their control, along with LEGO Spider-Man too, (Miguel actually trusted that poor LEGO and seemed more at peace with him along with the others than not.) Anyways, while a very attention deprived Miguel tried to shower you in his once all pent up love and touch, you were too busy still thinking and being busy.


“I wonder if Hobie is going to pull a funny prank once you get back, he hates your guts yet can never leave your lair area.”


Miguel mumbled incoherent words as his lips kissed every part of your soft tummy, your shirt now scrunched up to your neck. You were in simple panties while Miguel rested in his boxers, choosing to have less clothing between the two. You felt Miguel all over you, relaxing in his touch but thought a little more before adding,


“Baby can I babysit MayDay one day? So Peter B and you can work better together and he’s not very distracted?”

This time he let out a groan which you considered a ‘yes’.


“Oh yay!”

To that he softly bit your tummy, to which you let out a soft squeak but nonetheless put forth,

“Or maybe I’ll go on a mission with all the teens, they all seem pretty fun, especially Miles and Pavtir. Gwen gives me ‘mommers’ energy, I’ll invite her to the mall instead. ohhhh.”


 He had just left a super wet kiss in between your breasts after giving attention to them, but he replied,
“Hmm hmm amor.”
Miguel loved to hear you talk, it was no doubt that hearing your voice made his day better (especially when certain spiderlings gave him a hard time.)

But right now, he didn’t want to hear that, he just wanted to hear your soft sighs, those little hitched breaths when he kissed a certain spot. Although more than any of those, it was the whimpers and pleading cried you made for him, along with the sweet moans that were addicting and music to his ears.

Buuuuuut, you wouldn’t god damn shut up. Your mind was working to fast instead of slowing down.
“Hey Miguel, when do you think Jess will have her bab-“

Ok, he has had it, pushing his hair back with one hand he lifted up off of your for a second before stressing out his desperation,


“Por Dios amor, can you shut the hell up for one minute?”

Silence filed the room instantly, you snapped out of your chatty self and saw Miguel’s warm brown eyes hold a yearning in them, and he was breathing hard yet letting in and out slowly. You felt bad for being selfish much, and for not being able to decompress for him.

“I’m sorry Miguel.”

A pout fell on your lips which he kissed away instantly,
“It’s ok amor... I’m not mad. Just... relax.”

You nodded and he then kissed you, feeling that you might give in already, but you began to make excuses against his lips. Mumbling the words against him as he had refused to separate from your lips,
“-ut Migg-“

He pulled away with a huff and held up a very serious finger to your lips gently,
“Don’t ‘But Miggy’ me. Miguel, your boyfriend is telling you to shut up and let me love you. No more work, or nothing. All I want to hear from those pretty lips is moans and my name. Es todo, y nada mas.”


A little snicker passed your lips as you then exaggerated with heavy pants,
 “Oh yeah! Yes please! Ohh- AH MIGUELLL! Oh- fuck!!”


Miguel let out a delicious chuckle with a smirk, groaning lowly as he seated himself deep inside you, relishing in the fact of how you squeezed him so perfectly, hitting all the right spots for him. You were left breath and wordless, as his sudden act caught you off guard and now shut up. You let out a shaky breath and a small moan, trying to suppress it as he pressed in harder and held his place as he whispered to your ear,


“Wanna be quiet now? Thought you wanted to be loud? Hm queirda?”


Teasingly he dragged his fangs across your neck, placing feather light kisses behind the wet trails he left. You squeezed his broad shoulders tightly and in that moment you tried to admire his stealth and magnificence above you, but your mind went racing, and you lost yourself in his eyes as you once again went into thinking,
‘How’d his big size fit in so quickly and unexpectedly-‘


“Amor. Are you ok with this- I’m sorry if I-“

Miguel had the guiltiest frown and started to pull away, and you felt as if your air was being taken from you. How could he think he was in the wrong for absolutely praising and pleasuring you?

With grabby hands you pulled him flush against your chest as you pleaded,

“No no no! You’re ok baby, I swear.”


 His brow picked up a bit as he then asked curiously, showing how much he actually cared about ‘you’ over everything, even while still balls deep inside you,
“Then what’s wrong amor? Hm?”


His homey brown eyes bore only yours as you calmed him,
“Sorry, I was just.. lost in thought.”


 His frown was long gone as he pursed his thick lips and couldn’t help but tsk,
“You still have a question do you?”


Your cheeks burned bright red as you slowly nodded and whimpered,

“yes.”

He propped himself on his elbows to not crush you as he then threatened with a kiss to your nose,
“You have one last question to ask before I rail you until you stop thinking.”


 A breath left your chest in satisfaction as you wiggled a bit, biting down a moan from feeling him swell harder in you, and perfectly ignoring how he bit his lips hard to contain himself. You then raked your hands across his back as you perked,
“How’d you squeeze yourself so easily inside of me? When it usually takes-“

Then you took one of his hands and kissed his knuckles before continuing,
“-your fingers to warm me up?”


 Miguel let out one of his warmest smiles that had a hint of tease in it as he replied,
“Well... you were to busy thinking up here *kiss on your head* instead of thinking down here!-“


And with a quick pull back he slammed himself back into you, causing you to arch into him and this time really moan out,
“Ahhh! Oh Miiiguel.”


“Si? I’m here amor. And you-“

Another deep thrust*

“-were long ready before you even knew it.”

deep thrust*

“Oh go-“

“No amor.. just me.. Miguel. Vamos amor, say my name.”

Lust and pride burned red in his eyes as he looked down at your smaller form under his, adoring every move and sound you made, because of him.

With gentle but hard moves he thrusted into you, being the cause of your short breaths and little whimpers that he was now happy to receive and hear. Arms wrapped around him you pulled yourself up and bit onto his lips, and you left him a sweet kiss before challenging with a sultry voice,


“Make me, Miguel.”


His slower, languid movements suddenly stopped, as he watched you look up at him with a high chin. You let go of his arms and dropped yourself back down, lifting your arms above your head and resting them there. You were sure in a damn mood huh? But it only excited you and brought more to your arousal when he growled,


“Lo hare entonces.”


 Eyes now glowing red, in seconds he had one hand clasped with both of yours, fingers intertwining in a bruising grip, holding them high above your head. With his other hand, he put a soft pressure on your lower stomach, and trailed it up, expanding his fingers to get a whole feel of your skin against his. He stopped his hand right at your throat, his sweet voice betraying his sharp demeanor when he asked- of not pleaded,


“Por favor amor? Do you trust me?”


You sent him a confident smile with a verbal reply, knowing he preferred those for good confirmation,


“Yes love. I trust you.”


Fingers embracing the hold your neck gave him, he squeezed lightly, not wanting to push it too much, but it was just the right amount.

Miguel loved pushing you and trying new things, but he always did it after asking and making sure you were absolutely comfortable. If not he wouldn’t ask twice to do it or make you feel bad about not going with it.

Now your legs found place around his waist, hugging him tightly as he had pulled back and you refused him to go any further out.

But your worries about that were cut short when he began to pour his love out to you with every sharp thrust. Hitting every spot in you had you almost seeing stars, warmth seeped into you from the inside out. Low whimpers escaped his lips all while he made sure loud moans came from yours.

Also, one thing Miguel couldn’t go through this without- was the praise.

“You’re taking me so well amor, eres perfecta. All mine hm?”

A kiss to your lips he added,
“Look at you, hermosa. Tan bueno... look at me.”

You eyes had tried to flutter shut, but at his whimpering plea you couldn’t deny him. Your fucked out eyes looking into his hungry and lustful ones, you both fed off on one another, pleading for more.
 Words were almost not able to get out from how breathless he made you with every thrust. Bit with a certain one that hit you right where it made all the butterflies go all out, you did muster out,
“Y-Yes! Jus’ for you Mig- ah! Please- don’t stop!”

A heavy sigh left your lips as tears prickled in your eyes, the pleasure all too good to keep a straight face. You could feel it all building up, but it felt all too right and perfect to want to finish it and let it go so fast. And you knew Miguel felt the same when he groaned,
“Just a little longer amor, no quiero parar tampoco.”

Your legs pushed him further into you and you dug your heels into his muscled lower back, reaching up to kiss he parted lips.
 Lips then connecting he took your breath away yet provided leverage with his hard pants escaping into you. His muscles rippled under you and you could feel his every movement as he pressed himself impossibly closer to you, not getting enough of your touch or your skin against his.

A light coat of sweat covered you both at the close proximity, but neither gave a damn as you dove into the heat of this moment, embracing into this warmth and heat that was like no other. It was the kind that made you feel safe, known, belonging, cared for, and most of all.. unapologetically loved.

After every other thrust Miguel seemed to be going faster, his hand leaving your neck to use his fingers to rub against your clit, prompting you to reach your high he called his trophy.

Your moans spurred him on as you could feel that familiar and all different warmth of pleasure grow in your lower tummy. You squeezed Miguel’s hand tightly as you pleaded in between moans,
“Ah! Miguel, please.”

With a harsh but quick kiss to your lips Miguel teased,
“Please what? Qué deseas amor?”

He let out a deep groan when your walls tightened around him, making him let out a sweet low moan that was rare to get but you swallowed his every sound desperately like a drug. He smiled with his lips on yours as he asked,
“You close amor? Hm? I can feel- ahhhh.”

You’ve never heard Miguel this vocal before, and you couldn’t lie and say it wasn’t triggering something deep in you. Finding him strong in his vulnerability, as he moaned to your words,
“I’m close baby- please! F-Faster!”

Miguel then let go of your hands, and wrapped his arms around you, settling with one hand splayed on your back, and the other gripping your waist tightly, threatening to leave ‘love tattoos’. With a single kiss to you lips Miguel growled,
“Como deseas, aferrate a mi.”


 Your arms grasped tightly onto his broad shoulders, closing whatever gap was left between you two. Your cheek was pressed on his and you held his head against you possessively. 


Miguel put himself onto his knees, and laid you down while clinging onto him for life, as if you were afraid to let him go and lose everything of him. With a reassuring kiss to your head, the fight for your highs became utterly real.

With quick, deep thrusts he began to absolutely rail you, grinding onto your sweet spot with every hit, spurring you on and raising your cries for him.
“Oh Miguel! Ah! Please please- Miguel!!”

He could definitely feel how close you were to an euphoric moment, velvety walls swallowing his length and milking him for what was to come. It only encouraged him to suck up what was left of his adrenaline to sink further in and gift what he could in pleasure.


 Miguel loved you entirely, he’d kill and die for you. You had given him your heart and knew he wouldn’t screw up again, and if he did, he swore with his heart and life that he’d pay for it. In return he had finally given his to you, once he saw and knew you’d do the absolute same for him, if not more.

His life was harsh and more than occupied, he wore a mean facade 99% of the time so he wouldn’t be stepped on, but with you, he could be 100% himself, and this is who he was. A loving, self-sacrificing man, who was vulnerable and healing by giving his all to you. Showing his love endlessly by making himself yours and you his. 
 Feeling himself coming to close to his release, he let go of your waist and trailed his hand to your clit, using his fingers to press down harsh and tight circles that have you curling your toes.
“Vamos amor, come baby I’m right with you. I’m h-here.”


 His words cut short when you finally let go at his command, gushing on him as you let out a deep cry of his name and ‘I love you’s’. 
 Miguel embraced you close as he let go right after you, panting and kissing your neck as he let his cum paint inside of you, marking you once again as his. With a couple last deep thrusts, he finally came to a stop and took deep breaths in between heartfelt words.


“I.. I love you amor.. so m-much.”


You responded with a light kiss to his lips and a mumble, feeling the exhaustion slowly take over,
“I love you... more baby.”


 Miguel got up on his elbows, muttering comforting words as he slowly started to pull out, but you whined a bit and held his shoulders, a small but visible pout on your lips. He thought you were very sore after such a long and hard session, but you quickly said,
“Stay inside.. I.. I want you close.”


 Miguel smiled at you sweetly, knowing that he too would love to do the same, but you needed a refreshing bath first. So he bargained and promised,
“Why don’t we take a quick bath, then we can do that, yeah amor?”

You thought for a minute before accepting he was right, the sticky feeling in your legs showing so. The thought of having cool yet warm water embrace your growing sore body, had you ready to get up immediately.


“Ok baby, let me get up to start it-“

“No no no... let me carry you, come on.”


Like the strong man he was, he was able to sweep you up into a bridal style, carrying you gently into the bathroom as you muttered,
“Thank you..”

“Anytime amor. Sit here while I get the stuff ready.”


 He gently placed you on the sink and wrapped you with the sheet you dragged along so you wouldn’t get cold, pressing a kiss to your lips twice, he then went on to prepping your bath. 


Having memorized all the salts and bath bombs you preferred most for soreness and relaxation, Miguel efficiently and quietly placed them all into the warm water, splashing it a bit to make more bubbles (as he knew you secretly loved it passionately) 

 In peace you watched how his back muscles moved so enticingly with every thing he did. They were so big and comforting to touch.

He used his strength to take out big scary guys and protect his multiverses... but he also used them to make your bath perfect, and that thought... did warm your heart and make you fall harder for him as always.

His chiseled chest gleaming in light and in his sweat, brought you back to earth as he walked toward you with a warm smile and soft words,
“Ok mi amor, it’s ready, come on.”


 With one arm he picked you up, only confirming how tough you thought he was, and he gently and carefully placed you both in. His chest against your back he held you close, his hands never leaving your body. 


You two sat in quiet for a bit, relishing in the water and in each other, soon then Miguel asked if you were ok and not hurt at all, you responded with,
“I feel complete with you. I’m perfectly safe and happy baby.”


 With peppering kisses you two helped each other clean up, you too also asking him questions to make sure he was ok as well, and he responded assuringly,
“Never been better. Contigo estoy contento amor.”


 Little after you both were ready to hop out, as the water had cooled down. Drying off with fluffy towels, exchanging shy and loving glances at your exposed bodies made you both giggle a bit and have rosy faces, but you’ve never felt more free and safe. 


Massages were given to your sore legs and back, as Miguel rubbed on some lotion for you. You tried to do the same, but ended up being enthralled by how rock hard his abs were that you got distracted a couple of times.

So you instead helped him back by getting some fresh water and popping some fruit in his mouth, he couldn’t resist but return that favor but also steal fruity kisses. Then you two put out clean sheets, it all felt so romantic yet domestic, and beautiful combination that was so perfect. 
 Now completing his promise, the big, strong, mean and hard Miguel held puppy eyes and crawled on top of your laying form and whispered,
“Can we still...?”

“Yes baby, I haven’t changed my mind. C’mere.”


 He smiled like a dork, as he guided himself into you once again, this time he was soft yet firm, but you both sighed contentedly once he was fully inside.

Half of his weight rested on you, his legs to the side as his face came to hide in your neck, his hand finding place on your head and the other intertwined with yours. You cradled his head and kissed it sweetly,
“Goodnight baby, get some sleep.”


 Your words sounded like he was the only one going to be sleeping. Your voice sounded so alive compared to his, and he could only grumble,
“You better not be thinking. Go to sleep.”

“Miggy-“


 His head lifted to be above you as he worded seriously yet with a tease,
“Go mimis. Please amor. You’ll thank me in the morning.”

You lifted a brow and sassed,
“Promising another round sir?”


 Calling ‘sir’ had him smirk and threaten,

“More like rounds. I won’t only make your legs sore but your brain too.”

“Mmmm challenge accepted-“

He sighed a short laugh of disbelief at your still sassiness as he plopped back down into your neck.
“Mimis amor. Now.”

You were going to respond, but a sudden deep yawn came over you, and in seconds you felt extremely exhausted. Eyes closing slowly you worded lastly,
“G’night baby.. love you.”


 Miguel hummed against you, content to hear you passing out as he replied,
“Sweet dreams amor.. love you too.”


 You passed out before he even finished, he felt the deep breaths you took and how your hand went limp on his head. He smiled to himself and got comfortable, before riding his sleeping chariot alongside you.

Spanish Translations;
amor- love
Queirda- dear
Como deseas- as you wish
Es todo, y nada mas- that’s it, and nothing more
Lo hare entonces- I’ll do it then.
Aferrate a mi- Hold onto me
Vamos- come on
Contigo estoy contento- With you I’m happy
Eres perfecta- you’re perfect
Mimis- night-night

[applesandbannas747]

i wanna hear your thoughts on the fence challengers: long shot preview pages if you want to share!

oh mAN I have so many and they are all over the place!!

The first one is a little thing, but I bet Seiji had a crush on Marcus Washington when he was a kid--Nick's horror, Harvard's teasing, and Seiji's indignant blush imply as much.

And a fun fact, Jo posted a mini preview of baby Seiji to Patreon on February 14th...maybe I'm reading into it too much, but that's nothing new XD

Next couple of things are about the scene with the trophy case. It was really interesting and fun to see side-by-side redraws of Robert! It really illustrates the way the style has evolved, and also I gOTTA say it feels like Jo is more invested in Robert based on the level of detail she put in--like it's not just a style comparison, it's also just obvious a lot of attention was put into these shots when a) she could have just reused old shots (which she's done before, so I know it was an option), or kept it more simplified like she did when drawing the original shots.

I also think it's sweet that the redraws have Robert looking much more like Jesse than the originals.

And I am sure I will get flack for this, but I have incredible second-hand embarrassment from Nick leaving his newspaper clipping + note in the trophy case jfhdasl like bestieee noooo anyone can see that shit now oh my god please stooop

Onto some Nichoji thoughts! I love that Seiji's been confirmed as a before-bed reader! Him having a Kindle makes sense for the sheer efficiency of it too lmfao. Of course it's also adorable to see him in reading glasses <3 And then my favorite detail is Nick's stupid nightlight...notice where it is?

Rather than illuminating Nick's side of the room, it's peeking around the curtain and lighting up Seiji's reading, which is beyond adorable and sweet. I wonder whether Seiji stole it or Nick put it there knowing Seiji likes to read before bed, and I love both scenarios.

Also, it's fucking adorable that as soon as Nick mentions their date appointment, Seiji takes off his glasses and lowers his Kindle because it's got his full attention and investment.

And a quick pitstop to the locker rooms!

I like the visual metaphor here with Aiden and Bobby both very casual about changing and both literally having their shirts open; meanwhile, Seiji's straightening the cuffs on his button-down, which is already neatly tucked in and complete with his tie. It just highlights how Seiji's a lot more closed off than the others, and I think this was a neat trick to remind us of that.

In regards to plot, I'm still...really disappointed in the pacing. I know most people feel like it's a slowburn/it's taken a long time to develop, but if you waited to read Fence at all until it was complete and then read it all in one sitting, I think you'd see how unbalanced it is. Williams says that their first match will be in three weeks back right after tryouts:

which means everything between issue 12 and CHALLENGERS has happened in 3 weeks. Seiji and Nick's relationship is so sweet and cute, but it went from resentful rivalry to puppy love overnight with very little 'screen time' dedicated to the actual transition from resentment to friends (which I could write a whole essay on but this is not the post for that lmfao). Furthermore, the fact that it's the first match of State Championships rather than first match of the season is crazy to me. I'll admit, I didn't fence in high school--it wasn't even an option because we didn't have a team. And despite hours of research, the structure of high school team fencing is not entirely clear to me. However, I do know that typical high school sports go through the season, facing every other team in their division or whatever. Based on performance in those matches, they can qualify for state, and then their win ratio determines their seeding order for the state championships that happen in like 1-2 days. Seeding order is who you go up against in a bracket, so it's what this diagram is, basically:

(side note, but it appears there are 24 schools competing at state). Again, fencing could be different, but it kinda seems to me like we skipped over the season and went right to State Championships, which just cuts out so much development and build-up. It's like we're speed-running the entire story to get to the end faster. We cut out showing the development in the romance, and now we're cutting out the development of the plot. There's still plenty that we can do at state, of course, but imagine how much more it would mean to see Nick fencing in front of Robert if we'd built that up more. I just don't understand how we spent 12 issues on try outs, 4 on a practice match, 8 on camp, and none on the fencing season. It feels so abrupt and unbalanced. Tryouts and camp were my favorites arcs because they felt pretty well-paced as self-contained pieces of the story. I just feel like we needed waaaaay more relationship development between those two arcs to be satisfying, and I feel like there should be waaaaay more build up during the fencing season between camp and State Championships.

and now, the moment you've all been waiting for: my devastation over Eugene's role (???) in the story. I honestly question why he's in the story at all--at this point, it would have made more sense to have him flat-out not make the team. Except that keeping him this long lowkey backs up the theory I've had on his role since Striking Distance/RIVALS: Eugene is here to make everyone else look better/cooler/more impressive. The very first thing that struck me when reading the first look was this:

The dialogue here suggests that only one reserve actually gets to be on the team in the end, and the reserve is Nick. And, worse, everyone expected it to be Nick. Sure, it's sweet that Seiji thinks Nick's the better fencer, but all I can think about is how hard Eugene's worked for ten years trying to make the team as opposed to Nick's three months of fencing. Now, I love an underdog story. But it's interesting because Pacat stated in an interview (I'd have to go find where for the specific quote) that he always feels bad for the person who's been working to be #1 their whole lives only to be knocked out of the running by an upstart underdog--which I've always assumed would influence the path taken in Fence...and it seems like we may well let Seiji and Jesse remain above Nick in skill (or at least it seems like we won't be dethroning Seiji, even if we go for Jesse), but Nick's overcoming smaller obstacles. And those smaller obstacles hurt worse to see crushed because Eugene almost made the team in a way that mattered, only to have that taken away. It would have been less cruel to him and his fans to let Nick take the reserve slot back in issue 12, but instead we brought Eugene along to serve as a means to make Nick out 'secret weapon' and elevate his story.

I will say though, this page is one of my favorite Eugene moments because I see the character I selfishly want Eugene to be in it. From the context of the panels above, this page is likely Williams telling them that only one will be fencing in State Championships, and this is their reaction. Eugene's immediate concern for Nick and the comforting hand on his shoulder followed by a bright smile and a thumbs up--he just cares so much about other people and it so used to smiling through his own pain/disappointment and comforts Nick through being positive (and as seen back in issue 12, up playing his competitiveness) and acting like it's no big deal.

Eugene deserved better, but if this is where he goes out, I think I can live with it. Better to see him go now than continue to be a means to uplift the rest of team by being less than. but, man, I was really hoping we were turning it around after his moment in REDEMPTION being the only KR boy not to lose his bout

anyway, thank you sm for listening to my rambles!!! <33

[iloveundertaesooomuch]

Some advice from AU Calebs!

Heck yeah I did it! Finally i finished ONE of the HUNDREDS AU crossover ideas I have in my head!! Crossovers are fun guys!! (I apologise for a bad english in advance. Writing this it a rush.)

"It's ok to ask for help." (A Reverse Of Feathers And Mud by @jess-the-vampire)

I couldn't make a crossover meme without the legend. Sorry, not sorry. He is such a sad lad but tries to stay positive and be happy for his family uydfykudsutsudskudsluds (*dies*). I have to admitt, Caleb's dad energy is too strong for me to handle without wanting a hug him. No wonder! He was THE grandpa for centuries straight without a break. At least Caleb gets his whole family together in the end. Comics with him and either Hunter and Philip or Luz and Eda make me run in cirles around the room aaaa.

"You are not a burden." (Brother's Keeper by @idoodlestuffsometimes)

Damn, you definetly created one of the darkest AU in the fandom. Each time I re-read AU related posts I scream my lungs out because it is so angsty and so great. I am genuinely scared of your Belos ngl, because.. this man didnt loose anything and he still proceeds to do all that stuff. Enconter with him has 0 survival rate.

POOR CALEB! At least in the world of memes he had an opportunity to flee the captivity twice (the bald head and the car). This man had no moment of mental rest for centuries oh my God. One of my friends wants to fight his brother personally to protec Caleb at all cost sksksk. Well, at least Hunter will always have an actually loving relative! And if the happy ending is going to be canon, I think the future looks great, especially knowing how much pain all your characters go through currently. (And I think both Caleb and Hunter would need the "you are not a burdain" affirmations. At least some form of support in their situation.)

You said in the latest ask-answer that BK!Caleb was supposed to have white streaks in his hair so I attempted to add them. Hope they look fine! Colors for the outfit I got from Belos, so they would match, I guess???

"Murder is okay." (Loose Strings by @oldmanpip)

My bro, brother, friend... Despite you being not to involved on the discord server, my brain is still rotting with your great awesome AUs. And I know you know that. Your Caleb is really loose in all sences of that word and I love that. Wonder if your AUs will ever be available to the public. Because oh boy oh boy they deserve to be recognised. (Loose Caleb is such a conservative grandpa who never did anything wrong, wdym?)

"Your feelings matter." (Pip In Time by @celestialscribbler)

Honestly? Man, your comic is the reason I got invested in Witteclaw couple at all. Even if the "Pip in time" is not their story, but you wrote their teen romance so sweetly. Those two melted my heart... I scream each time I re-read your comic for 100th time. Just WOAH my brain goes brrr! And Caleb as a character is also written really really well. I love him so much. He is such good brother but MAN HE NEEDS A BREAK FROM BEING AN ADULT! BOY! Insirt crying and heart emojis here.

(PS: hope you still care about your health!)

My thoughts:

I have been drawing this for more than a month I think? And the only reason for that is my university. I hope to actually get an ADHD diagnosis because something is clearly wrong with me. But thats not the point.

There are so many ideas in my head. Goofy and not. The only problem is that I have less and less ability to do what I want lately. I wish I could bring them all to life, but at the same I dont know if anyone will be interested. Would AU crossovers look too self-indulgent? Or nah? Idk. (Just Grimwalker-Isle already has so much potential for stupid ridiculous fun I am runnin on coffee juice.)

Litteraly my mind is plagued with different fun plots and possibilities I am going crazy. But I also have A TON of WIPs that I need to finish. Perhaps I will attempt to manage everything at once, but, no promises.

Wish me luck on my exams!

[tsumtsumrry]

Friends to lovers Harry styles? I was thinking Harry and the reader have been best friends for years with cute traditions like coffee on certain days or book clubs. Overall they know each other inside out and spend a lot of time together. There’s some tension bc harry is very obviously in love with the reader however she’s the only one who doesn’t see it. Despite the fact she feels the same she’s scared because she doesn’t believe he could feels the same. Maybe it could get a little angsty but with a happy ending pls! Thank you!

thank you very much for the request!! anyone who knows me knows that friends to lovers is my jam, so this was very very fun to write. hope you enjoy <3 (barely proofread so sorry in advance for any mistakes!)

“Well have you tried unplugging it and plugging it back in?” Harry suggests as you two sit inside the pillow fort you made, two glasses of wine sitting next to your knees and the sight of your small TV bugging out in front of you. 

You pout at your dilemma. It’s been a tradition since you two were kids to have a little quiet movie night in a cozy pillow fort. It’s not the first time your TV has been acting up recently and Harry keeps offering to buy you a new one but you always refuse. He’s too giving, that one. But god, do you admire him for it. 

“Tried that before you came, H. S’no use. Time for plan B.” you sigh at go to get up carefully to go retrieve your computer and a stool from your room.

Harry watches you with fond eyes as you go, the sparkle in his eyes that only appears when he’s looking at you evident (to everyone but you, that is). He’s almost a hundred percent sure you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen, the hue of your eyes melts him, the brightness of your smile blinds him. You have the softest, most soothing aura he’s ever come across and he just wants to be with you all the time. He’s smiling like an idiot just thinking about you.

“Got the computer. What are we watching?” he jumps a little, startled out of his thoughts when you walk back into your cozy living room. He watches you intently as you calculatedly place the stool in front of the fort and the computer on top of it. He smiles fondly at you when you adjust it at least five times because “it has to be perfect” and opens his mouth to answer your question, “what are we watching?” 

You carefully sit right back down next to him and after a small beat of silence you both turn to look at each other at exactly the same time and simultaneously blurt out, “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days!” 

“Twin flame telepathy back at it again.” he pumps his fist in the air and pulls it back while you giggle. 

It doesn’t take long to set up the movie and before you know it, you’re halfway through it, cuddled up into Harry’s side with his arm snug tightly around you. You occasionally look up at him when you see something funny to see if he found it funny too, and he does the same, causing an intense bout of eye contact and laughter. 

The warm hues of your fairy lights kiss his skin in a way that makes him almost glow with warmth, the green of his eyes is so intense in this light, it almost takes your breath away. Sometimes you wish time would stop so he could be as still as he is in this moment, and you could just look at him. Just admire how truly beautiful he is. The way his eyelashes flutter when he takes in the brightness of the images forms a small knot in your stomach. You feel your mouth part and it’s only when he looks down at you that you realize your staring might feel a little weird. 

“What?” you watch his mouth form the softly spoken word. You don’t say anything so he smiles and tries again, “what?” 

“Nothing, just daydreaming.” you reply softly with a small smile. 

“Watch the movie, dude.” he scolds you playfully and you roll your eyes. 

“Sir, yes sir.” 

“So you think waffles are better than pancakes?” Harry asks one of your mutual friends, Jess incredulously. Jess nods and Harry’s eyes almost bulge out of their sockets. “Are you kidding me? Pancakes are infinitely better than waffles. Who wants their breakfast to have craters in them, Jess? I mean c’mon. Tell them, babe. Pancakes are better.” He motions to you and your eyes widen, not wanting to get in between what is clearly such an important, heated discussion. 

“Pancakes.” you finalize with a small laugh. Harry smacks his hand on the table in triumph and points at Jess, who rolls their eyes at his antics. “S’two against one. Can’t beat that. Them’s the rules, toots.” 

You’re in a fit of giggles at this point, you’ve always loved the way he talked. He had this dry humor that utilized his unique vocabulary and it never failed to amuse you. 

He turns to look at you, scooting closer and slinging his arm around your shoulder. “Can always count on you can’t I, honey?” he smirks and shrugs you closer to him to press a messy kiss on the side of your head. 

You shudder violently and your hand immediately shoots up to wipe at your head, “ew, Harry!” you whine and he throws his head back to laugh. 

Everyone is just staring at the two of you fondly, your bond is something unmatched. The pure passion that you two display when you look at each other is unlike anything most of your friends have seen before. Everyone can see the sparkle in his eyes when he looks at you. It’s lost on them how you can’t. They just wish you two would finally man up and come to terms with it. 

He leans down way too close to your ear, his lips oh so faintly brushing against your skin, the laughter ceases almost immediately and it feels like time just stops. 

“You know you love me, sweet girl.” 

It takes everything in you not to let your body melt into his and flutter your eyes shut at the closeness and warmth of his touch. Even the faintest touch makes you nearly lose yourself, you can’t imagine what a real touch would do to you. 

You pull yourself together enough to respond, “yes, yes unfortunately I do. Freaking man child.” 

He laughs again and just hugs you closer. 

H: Sweetheaaart. Where could you possibly be other than with me? 

H: That rhymed. 

H: Gonna pretend that it was intentional.

You: Lol you’ve got the wrong day, H. We’re meeting tomorrow x 

H: Yes but I still would looovee to see you today. 

You: I’ve got plaaans. 

H: Spill. 

Harry bites his lip nervously as he sends the message. He’s been talking to some mutual friends of yours and they’ve had the bright idea to set you up with someone this week. They’ve been trying to push Harry to make a move on you for years and he hasn’t. Your friends say you’ve been complaining about feeling lonely in the romantic department and of course they took it upon themselves to “help”. 

He hoped that if he sought out plans with you, you’d forget about whatever silly “date” they’ve asked you to go on. 

You: A date I think. Can I call it a date? 

He sighs deeply, his whole body deflating.

H: Why wouldn’t you call it a date? 

You: I don’t know the guy and it just doesn’t feel right you know?” 

Immediately you see his face flash on your screen and feel the phone vibrating in your hands. Your brow furrows but you press the accept button and bring the phone up to your ear. 

“Don’t go.” is the first thing he says, his tone almost pleading. “If it doesn’t feel right, don’t go. You can come over to mine, we can do face masks or something. Just don’t go.” 

You sigh, seriously considering his offer, “but don’t you think I owe to myself, H? I feel like I never put myself out there you know. It’s time I’ve tried. Can’t wait around forever.” You mumble that last part, slightly turning your mouth away from the speaker. 

“What? N-nevermind. You said it didn’t feel right though.” he tries again, praying that a little coaxing can get you to not go on that date. He swears he’ll confess his feelings to you right now if that’s what it takes. He doesn’t know what he’ll do if that date goes well and someone pulls the girl he’s so enamored with right from under him. He knows that if you start seeing someone things will be different, and you might tell him that they won’t be at first, but he knows they will. He absolutely cannot lose you. That’s one thing he refuses to do. Regardless of his fears. 

“Doesn’t hurt to try, right?” You almost wish he would tell you not to go again. You so desperately wish he would tell you what you want to hear. At no point before this phone call did you plan or think about making him jealous or upset at the idea of you seeing someone else, but the tortured thought is crossing your mind now. And you just wish that he’d say what you need to hear to get you to not go on that date. Your nails are digging into your palms as you anticipate his response, the tension building in your muscles. 

His mouth opens and closes. He has all the words in his head, but they hesitate to come out. 

A beat passes. 

You hear him sigh and you know he’s not going to tell you what you need to hear. 

So so close. He was so close to saying everything that needed to be out in the open for both of you, but he chickened out. 

“Right. Go for it, babe. Hope all goes well.” he forces a cheerful tone, one that he even cringes at, and usually, you know him better than that, but the tears are pooling in your eyes and threatening to fall down your cheeks; you don’t want to mess up the makeup that you’ve just done. 

“Thanks, H.” Your voice wobbles the slightest bit. Usually he knows you better, but the tears are pooling and threatening to fall down his cheeks. He presses his fingers into his palm and hangs up. 

He just stands there for a moment, a lone tear falls down his face and he immediately wipes it away, you’re too pure and precious to be the reason for his pain. He wishes he could just tell you. 

He’s been dodging you. 

You basically know his entire schedule, and you know that he’s been dodging you. 

You sigh softly as another call goes unanswered. Your heart is aching from missing your twin flame. 

The date went well, surprisingly. The guy was kind and thoughtful, he pulled your chair out for you and said all the right things, he was a great conversationalist, he was attractive. He basically checked all the boxes. Except for one. He wasn’t Harry. And you weren’t deeply in love with him. You should’ve listened to Harry that night, honestly. There’s only one person you want to be with.

You almost want to turn around after you knock on his door. You felt stupid, like you were coming here to make a fool of yourself. 

The door swings open and you sigh a breath of relief.

“Harry.” you sigh, “I’ve been trying to reach you for days.” 

He nods and opens the door wider to let you in. Your arms wrap around yourself protectively in a way that they never have around him when you step inside. He notices instantly. 

That’s his breaking point. The idea that that comfort you feel in each other is being challenged by his inability to just tell you how he feels. 

He walks towards you slowly. When he’s in front of you, his hand reaches up to touch your cheek softly and you frown in confusion, “why have you been avoiding me?” you whisper, not trusting your voice when he’s touching you. 

He shakes his head, “I’ve been avoiding a lot of things, you weren’t one of them, though.” 

Your frown deepens even more, “H. What in the world are you talk—” when you realize how close he’s suddenly become, your talking ceases. He leans in further, faintly brushing his lips against yours, using his grip on your cheek to angle you in the perfect way. 

“I’ve been avoiding my feelings. My feelings for you. These intense feelings that have been just utterly consuming me lately. These feelings that I think have been there since we were kids. It’s always, always been you, babe.” he leans down one more inch, and his lips are on yours.

Soft and delicate, but so full of passion that it overwhelms you. 

He kisses you softly again, first your top lip and then your bottom lip, then leaves one more soft peck on both. 

When you pull away you’re at a loss for words. You take this moment to look at him. To really look at him and just admire. A smile makes its way onto your face that you couldn’t have possibly fought even if you tried. 

“What?” he chuckles softly, stroking his thumb against your cheek and lips. 

“Nothing you just, you have this sparkle in your eyes that I’ve never noticed before. It’s beautiful.” Neither of you can stop your lips  from meeting again.

[reverieblondie]

hey! I wanted to request a criminal/villain!miguel x copFM!reader 🫣🤭 (Miguel is wearing his spider suit as his villain outfit)

LIKE Miguel is a criminal or villain whose hate when the cop chase him…except for reader. Who’s has been huge crush on reader and a bigger crush since the first time he stole something. but manage to stumble and fall on top of reader. Which reader was flustered and confused by the Miguel action.(for a reference for this request use megamind and the new reporter😭 but instead of using a human disguise.or miraculous ladybug☠️ 😭) and Miguel has Been in love with reader since he got save from a reader.from criminal or villain.and in Miguel eyes, reader was a good, sweet, caring person and the way she fighting the criminal and to him ….. it was sexy.and Miguel wanted was all reader attention.(and let be fr Miguel would be pervert nerd who’s follow reader social media just to see her face and fan girl about😝🤭)

so let just say he still got all he spider power and decided to move into a new apartment and when he was almost done moving…and reader was coming out of her apartment room to greet the new neighbor, and That when Miguel meet reader again.and god. when I feel like he would stutter, and say weird things, or random things to reader. As reader was looking at him with a confuse/surprise look. and Miguel knew he f$&k up so bad with his first small chat to reader who wasn’t even in work or wasn’t even saving any people.Miguel-“Dios mío … how the hell did I manage to f$&k this up … but this is perfect she my apartment neighbor” Miguel said in his mind.time skip😭😔,a few month in.and reader is having feelings towards her weird neighbor. who is just a mess. As she was telling Jessica about her crush.and Jessica is just laughing about it and saying to reader Jess-“ oh? ohh! Lorrrrd! Gurl this sound like some high-school crush all over again *chuckle*”.and reader would nudge Jessica shoulder and say “stop it…not funny” and pout about it and Jess wouldn’t stop till there caption called them into action on (the time was like 9:00 or any time would be good 😔) -#### ### #### street. and that where reader is trap with villain!Miguel.Which IN Miguel original plan he was going to have a nice chat, and want to tried find what reader like in general. in his villain side.(because he more serious about it 😭☝️idk). But some other sidekicks-villain…well not it just Layla playing a prank on them but Miguel didn’t know that. and what Layla decide to put was some fun gas🤭

Nfsw part: those fun gas was sexual drug that boosted there sexual desire for them and make them delusional or not idk☠️.(☝️😔 the same problem with all of us being delu BUT IM PROUD OF IT 🗣️) and reader was lucky enough to caught some of the gas.but Miguel. in the other hands wasn’t lucky enough and caught all the gas. after a an few minutes the gas went away.but not the effect that was going through reader body, her body was hot and the way room felt warmed and Miguel was hanging on the edge of the desk (the setting is that there in a abandoned office or building) and Miguel is busy panted, grunting, and is overall just so arousal same with reader but not that much that she lost control. Like Miguel did.

HOPE you enjoy the rest of your day and I hope you enjoy this request! Also I love your writing and i love the sailor moon theme 🫶 bye! [Fluff/smut any kink will be fine but I feel like breeding kink, or some overstimulation or some choking idk 🤷‍♀️ you can choose.but I hope you have a wonderful day 🤟]

I finally did it! I am so so sorry it took me so long to complete the request! I wanted to write my Halloween ones before the 31st, then I was hit with the craziest writers block of my life! I finally got over it last night and was about to get this out! I did change up some stuff a bit but I hope you still enjoy!

Criminal

criminal/villain!miguel x copFM!reader

Summary: Miguel hates cops, well all expect one...

Word count: 5,716

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Smut with Plot, Praise, Unprotected Penetrative Sex (wrap it before you tap it), Oral, Fingering, Cum eating, Sexy fun gas?, Breeding kink, Slight chocking, Slight Overstimulation. Miguel calls reader his 'good girl'.

The room is dark, and the sounds of whirling machines fill the space. The office-like space is filled with gadgets and an arrangement of computers, new developments in tech and torn apart failures. Then a low groan seems to light the room's holo-screens adding an orange glow to the space. 

Layla appears in a flicker glowing in her yellow light “Sooo, I’m going to take a guess and assume that the plan didn’t go well?” 

Another groan releases from the dark shadows of the room, and Layla rolls her eyes “Come on boss, no use sulking about it.” 

From the darkness his red eyes glow first, then he emerges from the shadows, the scowl of his face being reflected from the intimating mask. “Those damn cops…I hate those damn cops…they ruin all my plans…” Miguel grumbles to the AI as he walks to the Holo screens. 

Miguel O’Hara, better known as the allusive criminal mastermind, Spider-Man. Miguel had picked up the title when he received his spider-like abilities in a freak lab accident. Miguel was given a chance that people often dream about, the option to become a superhero and use his powers to protect the city he resides in. 

But…

Miguel didn't ask for these powers. 

Also, this was Neva York, a city filled with corruption, where, as Miguel was concerned, only the lowest of low resited. So instead of using his powers to help save the city, he used them to save himself, exclusively.  

“You know Miguel that isn’t true…you don't hate all cops,” Layla says with a grin 

Deactivating the mask portion of his spider suit, and scowling at Laylal he didn’t need her quips right now, with the night he'd had anything could set him off. Instead of falling for the teasing he grumbles to himself as he starts swiping away at his screens.

Miguel despises the cops, the goody two shoes always trying to ruin his plans. Having to evade them was an inconvenience and he hated being inconvenienced. Though he would never outwardly admit it, Layla had a point, he didn't hate all cops. There was one who was different, one who had snared him in their dazzling web of righteousness, you.  

Miguel remembers when he first met you, 

He had just gotten done stealing some new revolutionary tech from Alcamax. The cops were hot on his trail, running through the facility where he was avoiding capture. Not that those idiots could catch him. The goal was the exit to the roof so he could easily swing to freedom. Sharply turning corners and sprinting through the halls he knew he was approaching his escape. 

While quickly taking a turn that would lead him to the roof access he crashed into something or more like somebody…

A sharp squeak had been your first response to him crashing into you, caging you underneath his massive form. Urging himself to get up and run he instead found himself unable to. Feeling your soft warm body pressed against him had him ignoring all basic instincts. Don’t even get him started on your face, those wide doe eyes, your sweet lips sucking in a gasp, the slight red that was blossoming on your cheeks. It was impossible not to stare. 

Caught in the surprise you didn’t scream or speak at all, you just stared back with that adorable slack jaw expression. Breathing became slowly shallower as the moment lingered. So many thoughts went through his head: Tie you up? Talk to you? Take you? 

Finally, the moment was interrupted by your radio going off inquiring about your position. (underneath the enemy) Quickly rising to his feet he runs for the exit door. Against his better judgment, he turns around to see if you're radioing for backup, pointing your gun at him, or chasing after him. None of that is the case as he sees you staring at him with that shocked expression still plastered to your flushed face. 

Thinking back to the memory he feels his face warm slightly, he had been stuck on that moment since that night…

 “Layla, open file 10-7,” he commands, layla rolls her eyes with a smirk she knows exactly what file he wants to see.

The file is opened filling the holo screen, there is a lot of information and an arrangement of pictures, and what is this information and pictures of? You of course! Scrolling more he stops on your department photo, you're all done up in your uniform showcasing that beautiful smile. Were cops even allowed to be pretty? 

Since the run-in with you Miguel took it upon himself to look into you, what he found was a good-hearted caring person, you were a cop who was working for a corrupted city but your goodwill for justice was intriguing, you were one of the good ones, Miguel just couldn’t help himself with you…

“Have you been keeping an eye on her?” 

“Oh? Of your little girlfriend?” 

“Not my girlfriend…she's a damn cop..” a damn sexy one…

Layla drifts around looking at her AI-manicured hand, “Then I guess you don’t want to watch the video of her catching a suspect huh?” 

Miguel's ears perk up, “Show me…” 

“Nuh uh, magic word?” 

“Now!” Miguel slams his hands on the desk, and Layla scoffs at his temper. 

“Jeez, alright Mr. Pleasant, the magic word was please by the way”

Typing away at the screens Layla pulls up a video of you pursuing a thief. Miguel can’t help but get excited from seeing you in action. Never has he been attracted to anyone in uniform, but with the way your outfit hugged your curves and the way you moved, he was salivating. The suspect had turned to punch you but you quickly dodged (you must have taken some extra training from the last time he saw you). Dodging you grab the suspect's wrist twisting it into an armbar pinning them to a wall. Miguel can’t hide the excitement of watching you succeed. 

“That a girl” He whispers with his eyes lighting up, fist clenched tightly, an almost smile that looks like it teases at the corners of his lips. Quick to cover his excitement with Layla floating around he clears his throat going back to his usual expression. Little does Miguel know this is nothing new for Layla, she's well aware of his little fanboy tendencies when he thinks no one's watching. -He's so obvious. 

Saving the new video to the file he continues to scroll through watching videos of you, of your heroic escapades, Layla slowly drifts into his vision with a smug smile on her face, Miguel just rolls his eyes and scoffs. 

“Yeah Miguel, looks like you really hate cops…”

With his criminal lifestyle it's only natural he changes locations often to avoid the cops getting close enough to figure out who he could be. Sure it was a pain in the ass to have to move apartments every couple of months but it was keeping the cops in the dark and him free to continue his black market deals.  

The new apartment was nice enough, but he always made sure not to get too attached; it was temporary only. He had started to adjust to the new space, being here only three days. Unpacking, surveying the area, and avoiding neighbors. It was the same routine wherever he went, just be a ghost, unseen and unnoticed… 

A knock on the door is all it took to interrupt him from his daydream of a plan. Great…A nosy neighbor, that's the last thing he needs to muck up his plan. Heading to the door in an irritated rush he swings the door open ready to reject the pryer, the scowl on his face pressed firmly, till it's replaced to one of surprise. 

Miguel had to resist all urges to pinch himself, there you were, the face he had been staring at, the one he would see when he saw you on patrols, the one he would think about when those lonely nights were partially dreadful. He can’t help his eyes looking you up and down. He has only ever seen you in your uniform in person now you're dressed in your casual clothes, now to just see you in no clothes, then he could die a happy man. 

Clearing your throat he instantly straightens his back, he feels his hands suddenly become clammy, has he been staring too long? 

“Hello, I’m y/n, I live down the hall. I saw you moving in a few days ago and I just wanted to say welcome to the building.” your voice is like a drug, he could listen to you ramble for days about anything. But now he feels himself staring.

Shit! Quick, seem relaxed, lean against the doorway, leaning shows a chill individual that would be cool to hang out with. Miguel suddenly slumps his shoulder into the doorway in an awkward lean. The suddenness of the lean makes it look like he lost his balance and you jump a little at the action. Seeing your confused expression he tries to do something with his arms, he goes from them being straight against his sides to one being on his hip to finally settle them to being crossed against his chest. Nailed it. 

“W-well I didn’t realize y-y-you were the welcome committee,” he fumbles out.  Fuck! Stuttering now? Really? 

Looking at your face he sees it swarming with concern “Sir are you okay?” 

“yeah…just wondering why the universe hates me…” He lets out in a faint whisper

“What?” 

“Nothing…my name is Miguel…” 

Great, could he have fucked this up more? He's a damn criminal, he's been on top of you! Why is he acting like this? Before he can continue his inner lamenting, you let out a laugh. It's the sweetest cutest laugh he's ever had the pleasure to hear. 

“You're pretty shy, huh? Miguel?” 

Miguel can only smile down at your perfection, hearing your sultry voice finally saying his name. His heart feels as if it could burst at any moment “You have no idea…” 

“Well you don’t need to be shy around me, I was hoping we could be friends. Give me one second!” Miguel watches as you scramble back to your apartment. Of course, he's going to remember which one was yours, but just to keep tabs on you…nothing more…

Coming back out holding a Tupperware box, you quickly hand it over to him with that adorable smile. You're too sweet…

“I baked some cookies, hope you like chocolate chip” too sweet…

“Too sweet…” he mutters

“Oh, you don’t like cookies?” 

His whole body tenses, “No! I mean, I do…like cookies…I like sweets, I was just saying you're too sweet, Like these cookies…” Miguel holds up the cookies with a wide smile, can the universe just swallow him…he's acting like a damn idiot… 

You let out a laugh, sure, you're laughing at him but, he can't help how his chest pangs at the sound of your sweet voice and your soft face…he's got it bad for you…

“Well, thank you, I hope you enjoy them, hope they are not too sweet for you.” He swears you winked at him, or maybe it was just him hallucinating, maybe the whole thing was a hallucination. Watching you enter your apartment you wave bye, looking down he still sees the box of treats in his hand, nope this was real.  Back in his apartment he places the cookies on the counter and opens the container. The cookies are perfect, he takes one of the sugary circles and takes a bite. Dammit…It's fantastic….maybe he can stay here longer than he usually does….

“Sure, he's a bit…awkward but it's kinda sweet when he rambles plus sometimes he stutters.” 

You and Jess had no new duties at the moment so you decided to tell her all about your neighbor, it had been a month or so and you were getting quite close to Miguel. A nice neighborly friendship had blossomed between you two. Was he a shy rambling mess yes, but it was oddly cute…he was cute…and something about him…every time you saw him seemed so…familiar…   

“Oh man, sounds like your villain boyfriend has some competition” Jess smirks at you. Face dropping to irritation you're not amused by the teasing. 

“Will I ever live that down?” you grimace. 

Jess wraps her arm around your shoulder, “You're the one who let him go” 

“I was in shock, It was an accident, He fell on me! And even though he was masked…I could just feel his stare on me…so intense…” 

“Well let's hope we have no more intense moments with the criminal, captain was on your ass about it for weeks…” 

“I know…” You rest your head down in defeat on my desk, the interaction with the ever elusive spider-man had been plaguing you for months. Nobody could let go that you had let the criminal go. It's not like it was on purpose, he had taken you by surprise…with his solid body…pressed onto yours…his burning warmth almost scorching your skin. You have to shake away the thoughts remembering to get a grip. That guy was something else…

Jess just slightly chuckles patting your shoulder to bring you back from your thoughts, “Tell me more about your high school crush on your neighbor” 

You shoot her a look “It's not like that, he's just interesting and I like chatting with him in the hall.” 

“Sure totally, let me ask you this, do you walk slowly to your apartment to see if he will exit to get a chance to run into him?” 

Staring at her you avert your gaze feeling embarrassed she figured you out so quickly. Jess busts out in laughter “Sounds like a crush girl” 

“It's not a crush!” 

She smiles leaning in, mockery lacing her voice “Oh, stuck between the awkward nerd and the criminal bad boy, tsk tsk, sounds like a romantic drama.” 

Opening your mouth to rebuttal your radio goes off calling you and Jess into the captain's office, this discussion will have to continue later. 

Rushing into the captain's office he sits there with a very serious look on his face. “We think we finally figured out where that spider freak has been hiding. You two need to go to The Haverlands and check out the abandoned building on 5th street, report back your findings, understand?” 

‘Yes sir’ you and Jess say in unison. Turning to head out caption speaks up getting your attention

“And we don't want any mishaps like last time y/n..” you nod quickly and head out on your assignment, people were never going to let that go. 

“I don't understand, can't you just talk to her at the complex” Layla floats around Miguel's head as he types away at his screens seeming to be setting up for something. Miguel huffs and rolls his eyes at her comment, is she serious? 

“No I can’t, every time she's near I turn into a stumbling idiot. Though she may hate me, I can talk to her directly from behind the mask.” 

“So, you want to get closer to her? But the only way you can do that is by being a criminal?” Layla looks at Miguel confused “You humans make no sense..” 

“Look, I want to know more and this is how I can do it seriously, I have to find out what makes her tick, what makes her want to save this waste of a city.” Miguel pauses for a moment, sure, the plan was radical and the likelihood it would blow up in his face was high. There is just something he can’t shake, you're different from the other cops, from how you act to how you looked at him that day…he just knows there's something to you. “Now did you check that she was for sure coming?”

“I hacked into the system and saw that she was on the assignment with her partner.” 

“Good, we just need to get her alone, just need to set it up, don’t need anything messing this up” Miguel's stare was intense on the screen, this was important to him. It had to happen like planned no surprises.  

“Don’t worry boss everything will go on without a hitch” Layla smirks as she types away on the screens. Layla was up to something….

Everything was going as planned, you and your partner had arrived as anticipated. Miguel knew that you two were here to find his hideout, but he would never actually let that happen, this was just a front house he used to meet with dealers and coordinate business from. He's far too careful to have his actual hideout compromised. Though, if a particular cop were to wander in…he would not find himself minding too much…  

All he had to do now was wait as you made your way towards him. It was all going without a hitch, and he could hardly contain his excitement. Finally, you walk through the threshold of his office, the door quickly shuts and locks itself trapping you inside. Examining the room carefully you walked through trying to look for anything to show if the villain was there. Emerging from the darkness Miguel appears in his iconic spider suit. Face cover obviously. 

“Well, well, if it isn't the clumsy cop?” 

“Uh, you ran into me, spider boy” 

“Unimportant details” 

“Actually, important facts” 

Before you can even process, Miguel shoots his blazing webs forward and brings him suddenly closer to you. His tall figure standing over you takes your breath away. The shocked look on your face makes him grin from under his mask, it’s your turn to be the stumbling one. 

Without a second thought, Miguel is taking your gun from your holster, in case you have any ideas. Sliding the gun away he looks back at you expecting to see a look of fear, though he sees your face as fierce as ever. Such a brave girl…

“What's with the look?” he mocks in a cocky tone

“I’m not scared of you” Your eyes pierced through him, he could tell you meant business. 

“Oh? Well, aren't you a brave cop?”

“I’m not brave, I just think if you were going to do something you would have.” -damn, she's not wrong. 

“Why do you do this?” The sudden question catches Miguel off guard for a second. 

“Do what?” 

Gesturing around with your hands you look around, “this? Crime? You have abilities people can only dream about, why not use them for good?” 

Miguel scoffs “Is this you trying to convert me?” 

“This is me trying to figure you out so I can stop you from doing this.” 

Miguel starts walking closer causing you to back up, it's not until your back is against a wall do you stop. His large arms cage you between him and the wall.

Miguel's voice comes off gruff, “Let me ask you this, why do you do what you do?” 

“I want to help people” 

A laugh comes out of him “In this corrupted city?” 

“Not everyone is like that…plus you could help…” 

“Not my job to be a hero…” he leans in closer to your face, but you don’t back down. 

“But it's never too late to change your mind.” 

Miguel can't help himself from placing his fingers on your jaw tilting your head up further to meet his masked eyes. “Why are you so interested in me?” 

“I could ask you the same thing.” 

That smart mouth of yours…it's taking all his willpower not to taste you. Do you feel this passion too? This magnetism you two share? You have to…that's why you're not fighting him right? 

Before Miguel can respond to you a noise catches his attention…a whining sound? Looking up he sees wall panels moving, one happens to be directly in front of his face. What? 

In an instant, a white gas blasted out of the panels filling the room. From where Miguel was staring the gas had hit him directly. Stumbling back he tries to cover his face while you do the same. 

“What the hell is this gas?” you whine through the haze

“I don’t know, I didn't plan this!”

“What do you mean you didn't plan this!” 

“I’m saying all this is just as surprising to me as it is to you!” he coughs through the gas trying not to inhale more than he has, but it's no use. 

Rolling your eyes you keep your mouth and nose covered, “unbelievable” 

“I heard that!” 

“You were supposed to!” 

Miguel looks around wildly trying to figure out the cause, he goes to his desk to activate the holo computers but everything is down and not responding. Trying to urge them to work he feels a strange warmth growing in his chest, ignoring it he tries to get his bearings but that odd warmth is starting to feel like a slow burn. His abdomen is constricting in a deep knot, his hands are becoming clammy. 

What is this gas? What is this reaction? His body feels like lava is rushing through him. Looking over to you he wants to see if you're having the same reaction. Seeing you his breath stops and all the hot blood rushes down to his cock with a painful throb. Your body looks to be shivering a tensing as each second passes, Your face, your body, your damn smell, everything about you in this instance is calling to his primal desires, begging to be fucked. Slamming his fist down on the table he feels his cock throb violently. He needs to get control but as the room continues to fill with gas he feels his rational mind slipping to irrational thought. 

Talons scratching on the table, it's taking everything for him to keep himself together. It's not until a yellow glow catches his attention that he looks at Layla's smirking face that he begins to connect the dots to what this gas is meant for. An aphrodisiac …

“What did you do!” he growls 

“Well….I figured you two needed a way to let out all your frustrated feelings, so I’m just giving you two, a little nudge.” she winks and disappears. 

Of course, and what better way to get people to open up than having them drugged up with a lust mist? He needs to have a look at her program again. 

The room continues to fill with the white gas and Miguel and you can’t help but cough and try to not breathe in the gas. Miguel's whole body feels like it's on fire, breathing in the gas makes his chest feel like he's inhaling shards of glass, the pain being immense. Becoming lightheaded he leans on the desk to support his body, a ringing noise clouding his ears till he hears your sweet voice. 

Turning around still slumped on the desk he observes your shivering body, your hands are pressed to your chest, the pain probably also in your lungs, but the face you making…eyes hooded mouth hanging open as you stare at him, he can hear every breath you make, your mumblings sounding like sweet begging. Swallowing thickly he can’t help but feel his body tease as he watches you squirm around. 

Closing his eyes he tries to calm himself but all he can think of is you and how badly he needs to feel your cool skin, and you need to feel his hot body.  

The gas turns off and you and Miguel are still trapped in the room. Though the gas has stopped the damage has been done, His body feels like it's reaching a fever pitch, and you can not stop shaking and staring at the masked man hunched on the desk. Watching his rampant breathing and the way his chest falls up and down has your mind fogging.

“L-listen, we n-need to get out of here” you stutter out as you carefully approach him. 

Before you can even make it a few inches closer he's already on you, hand pressed to your throat. The feel of his burning heat on your cold skin has you whimpering a moan you can’t hold in. This is insane, he's a villain, you don't want this, but you do, you're desperate for more. The arousal is dripping from your cunt, it aches, and it yearns to be touched by him. Those lonely nights…thinking of his body rutting into you…your secret desires coming to fruition. 

The bottom of his mask disappears and he quickly kisses you in a burning passion, slipping his tongue in to get a taste of you. He softly lowers the two of you to the floor. The cool of your hands has him groaning from your touch, he needs to feel more, he needs you to cool his body. Equally as desperate for his touch you spread your legs for him to settle between, feeling him rub his hard length against your clothed cunt and he ruts into you against the floor. 

The gas has stopped now, and you're well aware of how crazy this all is, but the tightening around your throat, the teasing against your sex, and how his searing kiss was spreading warmth throughout your whole body, you couldn't help but succumb to the gas lusting your mind. 

Miguel is completely lost in his desires, getting sprayed directly in the face has only made his lust worse. His plus lips move away from your soft lips, a string of saliva keeping you two connected. Looking down at you he sees your pleading eyes, the gas has affected you both but he's still buckling into you like an animal. 

“I need you y/n, I can’t hold myself back, so please…let me take you or shoot me…” 

The desperation in his voice has your skin tingling, you understand his words but you're equally desperate, all you can do is run your trembling hands down his tight chest to his perfect abdomen. Your voice is a trembling whisper honeyed with desire, his heightened senses ring it through his ears. “Take me…”  

With that his suit is dissipating revealing his bronzed sculpted body to you, keeping the mask halfway on his face, of course… The clothes clad on your pricking skin are slowly shed and his warm lips trail over your cold skin. Both desperately hungry for each other the undressing is slow and controlled, building the tension for each other to a new high. Lifting your hips you aid him in shedding your pants, his massive hands hook into your panties, you can’t help your hips buckling as he peels the ruined panties from your slick sex. 

Warm hands squeeze your ass while his lips caress your hip bones. All you can do is whimper as he trails down to your sex. Not being shy, he presses his nose to your swollen clit taking in the scent of your desperate arousal, he swears he could burst from the sweet smell alone but a taste is what he's been craving for all these months. Not wanting to waste another second he licks the slick from your puffy folds, teasing around your tight slit relishing is how you whine and push closer to his face as he does. Before plunging the muscles inside he wraps his lips around your clit licking and sucking softly. 

Hands gripping your ass tighter he pulls you closer to his face, releasing your clit he plunges into your quivering slit, constricting around his muscle as he gets drunk on your essence. Maybe it's from the gas or maybe it's how he keeps expertly eating you out you're quickly coming on his face, letting the release out with a silent scream. Eagering licking up your sweet release he can't help but groan into you. The vibration makes your body shake with the slight overstimulation. But it's intoxicating.

“That's my good girl, fuck, you taste sweeter than those cookies…” Now maybe you're still too blissed out on your orgasm, but you swear you heard him say that with his two fingers now spreading you open, you can’t be too sure you could hear anything past his cooing and your shameful moans. 

Miguel could care less if you heard what he said or not. All he can focus on is stretching your tight cunt enough for him to get inside, he wants you desperately but he wants you to enjoy it with no pain. He wants to take care of his good girl.  

“Play with yourself,” He commands as he pumps his throbbing cock, using the dribbling precum to lubricate down to the shaft. Being the good girl you are you quickly spread your folds open and run your clit letting him watch your pulsating entrance. 

Lining up he slapped his fat tip against your cunt biting his lip as you tease and jumped at each teasing smack, overstimulating you further, “Fuck, you want me to stretch you out mi buena niña?” 

All you can do is nod fanatically whimpering out soft yeses, “Such a good girl, I’ll make sure to really fill you up” 

Your eyes go wide as he smirks stocking his thick length before brushing away your hands to line up to your slit. The thick tip nudges into your glistening hole, feeling him push through your clenching cunt you can’t help but arch from the stretch and how it's warming your whole body instantly.  

Pushing into you inch by inch he feels the burning in his body slowly dissipating as he continues his friction in you. Leaning down he peppers kisses along your collarbone going up to your neck, nipping and kissing his way to your ear. 

“Ah, you feel fucking perfect for me, do you know how long I’ve wanted you? And now you're mine” 

Thrusting deeper, you can't help but wrap your legs around him and hold tightly to his shoulders as he bullies deeper into your clenching cunt. Feeling your sticky lubricant drip down from his cock to your ass with each in and out of his cock.. Never have you felt so full and never has he felt someone quiver so tightly drenching his cock. you're sloppy wet for him and all you can think about is his hot cum painting your strained walls. Your body is begging for him to breed you, to fill you up as his. Maybe this is less the gas now and more your own desires. 

“You clenching so tight guapa, it's like you want me to breed you” 

His words have you looking at him with hooded eyes nodding breathlessly, oh? Miguel starts thrusting harder into you, speeding up his thrust rolling into you deeper, hitting your sweet spot making you choke out a moan as stars pluck at your vision. 

“Is that what you want? Tell me, beg me for it.”

His tip thrusting against your cervix now has your pussy clenching down on his cock, you can’t help but hold on to him tighter, digging your nails into his skin as you get fucked dumb, screaming out your response. 

“Yes! Pl-Please! Fill me up! I want to be so full!” if you were in your right mind you would have died from embarrassment. But Miguel absolutely loves your desperate pleas. 

Your body is starting to feel warm, the cold shivers being chased away by Miguel's cock bullying into your cervix harder than before. Miguel feels his fever coming down at his new pace, he watches as his cock sheathes in and out of your swollen cunt, and a white ring forms around the base of his cock, feeling your clench tighter he’s determined to fuck you through your organism and fill you up till its spilling out.

Like a crashing wave, your orgasm hits you, causing you to cum on the masked criminal. The organism has your body feeling fuzzy and blissed out, screaming in pleasure like an unashamed whore. Miguel's rutting finally stills as he feels his thick cum releasing into your gummy walls, he can stop himself from fucking the cum deeper into you, a primal part of him hopping it takes to claim you as his permanently. 

Finally feeling his burning heat disappear while you finally feel warm no longer shivering, you two stay in place, panting at each other for a moment slowly coming down from your highs and back to your senses. Finally pulling out Miguel watches as his seed spills from you, he has to restrain himself from wanting to push it back into you with his fingers. To his surprise, however, your hand reaches down to do the action for him. 

Miguel watches in awe as his good girl tries to keep herself full, overstimulating your abused cunt in the process as you shove the cum back into your puffy cunt. He's going to keep this etched in his memory forever. Leaning over you he gently takes your hand away. Bring your ruined fingers to his lips, he licks your fingers clean, then leans down to kiss your lips parting your mouth to slip the sweet and salty taste to your tongue. 

His suit quickly recovers him and he gathers your clothes and hands them to your bare form. “Get dressed, quickly” Leaning down he pressed a finger to your lips “And keep this a secret my good girl.” 

The blush on your face can’t be helped as he instructs you with subtle praise. As you're getting dressed, Miguel finally gets the room back in working order, opening the doors so he can escape. Before he leaves he looks back to you. There is so much he wants to say but everything is catching in his throat, it feels just like when he sees you in the halls.

 “M-maybe, I could be good…for you” With that, he quickly exits through an open door. 

Taken aback by the confession all you can focus on is the voice, the slight stutter and how familiar it was…

Finally dressed you make your way to find Jess, The encounter deliciously replaying in your mind. The parts you keep replaying on a loop? His voice, maybe it's time you do some digging to make some connections….It will have to be your secret though…

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

I believe brittney doesn't deserve the unrecognization but i want to see relationship hcs about her. Mc/Reader is stoic and stern but can be sweet to her, A type of relationship where brittney is somehow different around Mc (Stealing glances, daily ranting to mc, i just like to think sweet things being happen)

A Gyaru's Rhapsody (Brittney x Stoic and Stern! MC/Reader - Relationship HCs)

Anon, I hope you enjoy, had fun writing for Brit, and I hope you lot enjoy reading it! (“⌒∇⌒”)

Also I do agree she is underrated AF. >:(

Also dw y'all Jess loved Brit as a bsf for life in this. <3

- Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer

Rhapsody: an effusively enthusiastic or ecstatic expression of feeling.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You were notorious for being cold and distant.

Hell, even Geo had deemed you icy.

Across the school people had learnt to simply not interact with you, because dear gods above did you master your intimidating death-stares.

Alas, the sole person whom you genuinely got along with, to everyone's surprise?

Brittney-fucking-Claire.

People were astonished, hell, she was astonished when you and her became friends (by your wish).

Usually she's the one who made the rules, who led the charges.

But she doesn't mind.

She personally thought you were intriguing, your personality was that of Geo's and Jess's smushed together, so Brit was shook when you went out of your way to talk to her.

After a while you join the group, becoming somewhat good friends with Crowe, Jess and Deryl while getting a lot closer to Brittney.

She didn't know why, but she felt a strange sense of security around you, she felt safe.

Unjudged.

Free to say how she felt.

You warming up to her - for reasons she still couldn't figure out - along with you being so oddly nice to her made her feel strange.

Eventually she decides it's not a facade and fully accepts your friendship.

Will start splurging all her gossip to you, you want dirt? Tea? Juicy deets? She's got it all.

Starts sharing her skincare routine with you (only shared this info with Jess so you better keep it secret pookie).

Soon enough you and her start going to facials and hair salons together, then do manicures and pedicures, then each other's homes.

Essentially you worm your way into her heart, and she's worried.

She'd not felt this strongly for someone in a long fucking time.

But...you'd proven to her repeatedly by this stage you were trustworthy...that you genuinely cared about her.

It slowly creeps up on her, the realisation that she's fallen for you, hell she didn't even crush on you, she fucking fell so hard she doesn't wanna get up.

She'll ask Crowe for information about you, and then advice.

He becomes a wingman frfr

Crowe will have to drop hints for you to confess, so when you finally do (btw congrats Anons, doing that shit sounds hard), Brittney just nods briskly. "Brit...I. Like. You." "Yeah, I like myself too." (liar) "Romantically. I...wanna be with you. Genuin-" "Yes."

When you both start dating, Brittney would have already been comfortable with you to the stage of being able to talk about literally anything (y'all love shittalking the nastier girls at Olympieus)

Also defends you from bullies, and will protect you if she deems it necessary (she always will, any excuse to hit those girls is a good one)

However, she becomes much more possessive.

Not to an extent where she'll restrain you.

She will simply fight anyone who dares try and steal you from her (spoiler alert, she wins)

When one of you is sad, you have an unspoken ritual to grab vodka, go to the others' house and rant, ramble and rave on about your problems.

Banger form of therapy.

Brit will also help you study if you need it, she's willing to take notes for you, hell, even tutor you if absolutely needed.

Will also give you #girlboss treatment

You both go out looking badass.

And you have the most fun ever. In short, you're both devoted to each other. And you're both more than happy to keep it that way.

[wavesgocrash]

✩°。Slow Down The Song⋆⸜ 🎧✮

Pairing: Abby Anderson X reader

Content: friendship w Dina content <3, (I love Dina). drinking/drugs, pushy douche man, mutual pining. SMUT! : spitting, spanking, degrading/praise, pictures are taken during, handcuffs(its a belt) head R!receiving, strap on sex r!receiving. LMK if I missed anything <33

A/N : first smut writing lmk how it goes :D kisses..

⋆⭒⋆˚。⋆˚。⋆⋆⭒˚。⋆✧·ﾟ: *⋆⭒˚。⋆⋆⭒˚。⋆⭒˚。⋆⋆✧·ﾟ: *⋆⭒˚。⋆⭒˚。⋆⭒˚。⋆⋆

You always saw abby, walking to classes, on her way to practice, the gym. She was in your liberal arts class. But you never interacted. She always had her headphones in. smug unapproachable face. She had this walk, like she owned every sidewalk she walked on. You always took a second to take in her outfit, pointedly checking her out, not like she'd noticed. when she passed you could smell her expensive cologne, admire her braided hairstyles. Sometimes you smiled and she didn’t even notice, sometimes shed look at you and try to give what looked like a smile, just a polite one.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

“hey chica” a familiar voice singsonged as she let herself in your dorm. you turned your head to find Dina in your door with a large backpack in hand “whatcha doin?” you eyed her suspiciously.. “my chem work..”

she trounced over to you shutting your computer quickly. “well not anymore, we’re going out!!!” she squealed excitedly spinning in a circle and dropping her bag to the ground.

You’d never exactly been a party animal, but with the stress of college it was so nice to get out and have fun.

“fineeee” you’d pretended to concede. rolling your eyes and twirling around with Dina

shed connected to your speaker, poured you both drinks and begun on your makeup.

“any luck with your crush?” she bounced her eyebrows obnoxouisly, referring to abby.

“i haven’t talked to her yet..” you confessed

“Y/N come on! its just Abby Anderson” she rolled her eyes as if abby wasn’t incredibly intimidating

“Dina she’s like six foot tall and has the RBF of a monster.” you pleaded with her

she rolled her eyes at you, finishing your lipstick. “go get dressed sugar”she smacked your ass playfully and said “els and Jesse will be here soon to pregame”

“no cat?” you asked referring to ellies girlfriend.

Dina hissed.. and squinted “ouch, broke up again?” you confirmed. This was like the third time.

Dina laughed starting on her makeup, already in her blue sparkly mini dress.

you walked into your room opening the dresser, hmm a red velvet and lace mini dress or a bedazzled low back halter top and leather skirt? “DINA?? DRESS OR SKIRT?”

“WHAT DRESS?”

“MY RED ONE”

“WHAT TOP WITH THE SKIRT?”

“MY BEDAZZLED ONE”

“OOO DISCO BALL SHIRT!!!” Dina screeched. you laughed and slid into the shirt discarding the idea of a bra, slipping your skirt on and your shoes into some short red pumps you felt perfect, and just in time. ellie called “ladies? we’re here.

“hi guys!” you ran up giving them each a quick hug

Dina said nothing, she was touching up her eyeliner.

once she was finished she ran out giving Jesse a peck and ellie a hug.

You were decently intoxicate by the time you even got to the party, Dina drank like a horse. (this is cannon)

As the party heated up and the lights somehow got dimmer the music blasting, you found yourself drunk. looking for Dina to get you another drink you ran smack into a mans back.

“oops sorry!” you slurred slightly.

he spun around, you didn’t recognize him “thats okay baby” he slurred heavily groping your hips to “stablize you”

You stumbled back and tried to walk past him, he grabbed your hips again. “dance with me bbygirl” he gave you a drunk smile

“does that line ever work?” you narrow your eyes grabbing his wrists and pushing back.

“yes” he winked

“not this time buddy” you snapped, and pushed off of him.

“god you’re a bitch” he grabbed your wrist harshly

before you could even get agressive, a large hand wrapped around your waist and a voice said in you ear “whatcha doin love?” Abby.

The man backed off chuckling, “my bad Anderson. Gotcha self a fiesty one huh?”

she pretended to chuckle. “ha yea, go find lilly i’m sure she’s missing warming your lap” and with that she yanked you away. you made sure to glare at his back on your way away.

whoever that is

suddenly you found yourself face to face with Abby Anderson. that hardend face present “you alright?” she asked her exterior melting as she leaned down to talk over the music in your ear.

“yea yea I had it handled. but thank you anyways.”

she nods looking at you, a new song plays, you love this song.

finally you found your balls. “dance with me.” you demanded more than asked.

she let her eyebrows rise, finally she said “alright”

she grabbed your hips without hesitation and your hands found her shoulders picking up to the pace of the song. As the song picked up you , let yourself daringly grind on her. her hands tightened on your hips “watch it Y/N” she rasped. Her voice sending electric down your spin and her grip lighting your skin on fire. the song crecendoded and you put your head in the crook of her neck kissing a small kiss. “what if I don’t want to?” you whispered “fuck Y/N how drunk are you?” she was still raspy her hands gripping you “drunk enough to take what i want” she hummed at your words, slotting her knee between your thighs, letting you move your hips with her body.

“can i kiss you?” you murmured. “fuck yes” she rasped out again you kissed her raggedly and she gave you the passion back, working on you. Breaking the kiss she dropped her head to your shoulder breathing you in, fighting back her needs, keeping her restraint. She thought she might ruin you right here in that fucking mini skirt.

breathe me in

breathe me out

you danced together locked in the heat of passion for what felt like five minutes but was for more then a few songs, suddenly the asshole who had his grip on you walked past winking at abby and drawing his eyes over you. She grabbed your ass possessively , causing you to jump forward, grinding your clothed cunt on her knee, letting out a moan.

“I need to get you out of here” abby hummed in your ear.

breathe me in

breathe me out

you nodded frantically ”just have to tell Dina”

She nodded and took your hand as you separated.

you found dina jessie and ellie out on the patio smoking a joint.

as if noticing your presence Dina passed it to you without looking up from her conversation. but when Jesse noticed the hickeys on your neck his brows furrowed, making the three of them looking you as you took a long drag off the joint. Passing it to ellie you started “guys i’m gonna um.. go home with someone” Dinas eyebrows shot up, ellie began taking you in, hickeys ,a hiked up skirt and a flushed face. “who?” she asked, ellie was this protective of everyone. you sidestepped to show none other then Abby fucking Anderson standing in the glass sliding door giving you guys some space to talk. “No fucking wayyyy-” Dina was cut off by ellie“is she sober, is she driving you?” ellie asked. you nodded. “okay cya.” Dina slapped your ass AGAIN as you trotted off. it was like her way of highfiving you.

The drive was mostly quiet. abby’s hand on your thigh, light music playing. The car stopped in front of her apartment building. “are you sure you’re okay with this”

“please abby.” you nodded. “if i didn’t see the way you looked at me every damn day I wouldn’t consider this. while you’re drunk.” your face flushed at her embarrassing statement.

the second you got in the door you were pushed against it locked in a heated kiss. kicking your shoes off. Abby all but dragged you to her room, unzipping your skirt “think i don’t see the way you give me fuck me eyes everyday huh? ” she growled in your ear. You whined.

“i have to hold myself back from this every fuckin’ day. lookin at me like that. like a slut who needs to be fucked” she chucked your skirt.

she ripped her own nice t shirt off showing her sports bra, then yours revealing your bare chest

“cant even wear a bra to the fuckin’ party. fuck your tits are perfect”

once soft spoken and quiet abby had flipped a switch. talking to you just the way you wanted, you’d imagined

“yours too” you slipped your hands under her sports bra and she helped you take it off, showing off her perfect tits.

she scooped you up only in your panties and brought your legs around her torso.

she attached her mouth to your perked nipple you let out a strained moan and she gripped your ass harder playing with your nipple with her tongue. switching to the other nd spending time on it. she walked over to the bed tossing you on it like you weighed nothing you gasped at the air being knocked out of your lungs, propping yourself up on your elbows. as she undid her belt setting it on the side table carefully, your eyes followed her hands and she undid her jeans sliding and kicking them off. she smiled at you, powerful body on full display abs flexing.

she lunged kissing you and kissing down your body, kissing over your clothed cunt.

“abby don’t tease. Please?”

“don’t tease? you’ve teased me for months staring at me, wearing cute little dresses, i should’ve been ripping them off of you the minute you got home. I should’ve been holding your hand to classes. ”

she began to lick your cunt through your thin satin panties as you canted your hips, whining.

finally she ripped them off. devouring you like she had been starved “abs.. making me feel so good.”

She looked up, smacking your slit and spitting on it after

you moaned out.

she sucked on your clit and entered a finger into you you moaned out your hole clenching.

“so fuckin tight. fuck.”

quickly she added another finger and you began grinding on her tounge. ‘Abs Abs im gonna!-”

“cum for me baby, cum on this face cmon. tell me who’s makin you feel this good”

her words sent you over the edge, a band in your belly snapping as you released on her face ”thats it thatta girl.” she slurped nastily on your pussy not even giving you a break.

she rose from the bed, your whining from loss of contact. ‘’i know baby” she pretended to pout, opening her drawer and pulling out a shiny box, and out of it she got a large baby pink strap on, maybe eight inches? your mouth watered at the sight of it. “bought this the day i saw you. wearin that lil top i couldn’t stand it.”

she latched it on over her boxers

‘ you whined at the tip sliding between your folds, she leaned up to you “ya alright with this love? she asked” “you nodded frantically kissing her, tasting yourself. she grabbed your face between her forefinger and thumb “open your mouth up” you did.

She was so nasty. she spit in your mouth and squeezed your cheeks to tell you not to close your mouth. she smiled at that sight. “so fuckin’ pretty.” she grabbed her polaroid off the nightstand “keep that mouth open wide baby” She snapped the picture. “oh thats going in my wallet.”

“Swallow” she commanded. and you did.

“fuck abs.. you’re perfect for me.”

“good baby” she chuckled

she used your slick to wet her cock and looked up at you, gripping your hips hard enough to leave bright brusises the next morning. slowly she slid in inch by inch, your eyes drooped as you moaned out whining at the size, all the way to the hilt. she checked on you, obviously enjoying it.

pulled out, and slammed back in. you screamed out at the feeling “A-Abby!”

“gunna fuckin’ split you in half”

relentlessly she pounded into you until she found that sweet spot that had your hips bucking. she abused it until your eyes started watering. using your hands you started to run away.

“ahh ahh ahh” she tsked.

flipping you over she grabbed the belt from her nightstand and skillfully used it to restrain your hands behind your back. your chest flush into her silk sheets.

she slammed into you at the hilt feeling your cervix. “gunna fuckin mold this pussy to my cock. you’re only gonna be mine.”

“Mhm i’m yours abs” you cried out

she went harder chasing her own orgasm as the hild of her cock bumped against her clit.

she smacked your ass causing you to jump forward and back, making her stroke that much deeper. “ass is perfect, this pussy’s fuckin’ perfect.” she growled out at you spitting down to where you connected. “abs- ABBY fuck. fuck. fuck.” you cried out

“yea baby tell the neighbors who owns you”

“Who owns this pussy?” she smacked your ass again and then she reached down messing with your clit

“ah! you abby. Abby does!”

‘m’ gonna cum abby.”

yea baby? go ahead cum for me she spat out.

she put her thumb on your asshole pressing just enough to feel how tight it was. spitting on it.

you feel your orgasm take over your body in waves, sending shock waves.

but she wasnt done

she kept going, no pace change. “m’ not fuckin’ done Y/N, gotta - fuckin’- make- you- mine-”

she slammed into you on each word making her point

you cried out, overstimulated, the orgasm you just had began to feel like a band that was going to snap again “abby pleas- is-its too much abby-”

“fuckin’ take it baby. fuckin’ take it like a good slut”

with your hands tied behind your back you had no choice to take it.

“Abs i’m gonna cum again. abs-”

“gunna fuckin’ cum too”

her strokes got sloppy, and she repeatedly smacked your ass alternating cheeks.

“Cum with me cmon fuckin’ cum with me, pretty”

“abs- ” the band snapped in your stomach, squirt covering both of your thighs.

“fuck Y/N, look so pretty doin it, fuck such a fuckin- good- girl-”

she accentuated her words with he lasts strokes her orgasm ripping out of her.. she rode it out in your whining, shiny wet cunt.

she un-lachted your arms and slid out of you.

giving you a kiss on the forehead

“did s’good for me baby, stay right here i’ll take care of you.”

she walked around the room putting the strap away you admired her strong back as she cleaned up, she took a warm wet rag to your puffy fucked out cunt cleaning you up and sliding a pair of her boxers on you, and her shirt over your head. she got dressed too and cralwed into bed with you, cuddling you into her arms.

[murkystarlight]

There's a lot of dynamics. So I have dynamics, headcanons whatever really for the new order as couples or... something close(not doing any with Jesse though... Too many different ones that I got to write if I do Jesse. Srry)(or poly. Again, too many variables to write) and most of these are rare pairs ig

It's just me talking random stuff :]

Don't take them seriously

Uh... who do I start with-

Okay. Olivia and Petra (olivtra?)

I'll start with that.

Yeah, so... it's cute. I like this one quite a bit actually. I can imagine something like.. Olivia needing rescoreses on a project and Petra, without a single thought, runs out and comes back in a few hours(sometimes a day or two) with what she needs. And Petra handing them to Olivia with a proud smile on her face while Olivia also looks at her with a warm smile. But also a bit concerned cause she might be hurt. And if Petra IS hurt, Olivia would probably start tending her wounds while muttering stuff like "you idiot. I could have just gotten them from a store" and Petra just laughs it off.

They would cuddle a lot(+forehead kisses from Petra)(then Olivia chuckles and kisses her back)(oh god- what am I doing). And Petra loves playing with Olivia's hair 😌

They're very open about the relationship from the beginning. Probably starts flirting in the middle of a conversation with a whole crowd watching-

Next combo, Axel and Petra (...wait. hold on-- nvm. I can't find a ship name for this)

They're both a bit chaotic. Right? So they would do each other's interest often. Like Petra going to see Axel in Boomtown and having fun with him off on the side somewhere, or sneaking out together to go on a quick adventure or just talk. Sneaking around the griefers can get a bit difficult, but sometimes they make an appearance and just fight with/against the other griefers too. It's all in good fun.

I personally think Petra is good at cooking(and pretty much every other skill to a... an amount) but she isn't great at baking. And Axel on the other hand, great at baking. But cooking.. not as much(still good at it. Just not as good when it's compared to his baking skills). But he also likes to set the kitchen on fire sometimes so he needs someone watching over him. But Petra isn't great at watching over people(and would probably help him burn the place) so they just live off of raw meat and berries. Take out orders daily👏👏

They have a more... playful and friend-like relationship with each other rather than flirty or lovey-dovey shit. That doesn't mean they aren't lovey-dovey though. These cuties would have so much fluff when put in the right situations. I also think that Axel would hold Petra up in his arms a lot, and she really likes that since- he would probably be the only person that could do it(since she is taller than most people). Sometimes she literally crawls onto his shoulders and sticks there for hours if she doesn't have anything better to do.

Probably plays a lot of pranks together on others

Next ship! Olivia and Lukas (if you were expecting Petra again, you're WRONG.😈 This is completely random. I just picked the names randomly lol)(anyways- ship name- uh... darn it-)

They give each other book recommendations. I just think they would. Plus, Lukas sometimes helps Olivia with her redstone engineering, and since Lukas isn't as great as Olivia, she sometimes gives him small lessons about it. I gotta admit they would be so cute together 😫

Olivia also gives Lukas feedback on his writing, and Lukas insisted Olivia to try writing too. (I think Olivia would have a diary)

Lukas likes making Olivia small treats to eat while she's working. (And bring her back to reality when she gets into the zone too much)

Either they are trying to keep each other on a healthy schedule, or they both are too immersed in their work and both of them stay up to work for days without food or rest. There's no middle! But after a long time of no-rest working they would cuddle up on the couch and sleep under a comfortable blanket together 🥰🥰

Their relationship would mostly be fluff

This... fourth? one is Axel and Lukas (lukxel)

They would definitely do a lot of baking together! They would share recipes, make new ones and taste each others baked goods. Axel is more into baking pastries or cake(like.. bread-ish?), while Lukas is more into cookies or muffins/cupcakes. Goes on picnics a lot with everything they made 🌸

They have this... uh... 'tradition' where they prank each other. Sometimes things get too heated and they fight. But they make up pretty easily and apologizes.

Lukas isn't a big fan of Boomtown. So Axel sneaks out a lot to see him. But Lukas still tries to go meet Axel himself, instead of relying on Axel to always come out to meet him.

Really tight hugs. (They are both very touchy and affectionate people)

They still kind of hold a grudge on each other for the past, but it's mostly solved. (They made it a joke to tease each other about it)

Okay- last two.

Olivia and Axel (axilivia?)

Not gonna lie. I'm pretty sure I shipped this when I was younger(still kinda do?)

They're like a old bickering couple. They're just too comfortable with each other. They found a nice spot between Boomtown and Redstonia where they can meet up. Even built a small house there so they can chill together. I feel like they would've bonded by being

'no screentime buddies'

*sparkle sparkle*

Axel still tries to scare and play pranks on Olivia. But by now, Olivia's more successful at doing pranks on Axel than Axel is at her(she likes to prank his pranks(??))

Last but not least- Lukas and Petra (luktra)

I'll be honest, I ship them so fricking bad- 😭

They're like a... childhood friends to lovers to a married couple who got divorced five times or smth but somehow still in love and gets back together everytime leaving everyone around them confused

Okay. Thank you for listening (I am happy to yap more about any ships you want me to yap about👐)(and I mean anything)

[facewithoutheart]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

Thanks Jess & also @bookish-bogwitch, @skeedelvee, @run-for-chamo-miles, @aristocratic-otter & @urban-sith who also tagged me ❤️ y’all are lovely and I’ve enjoyed seeing the work you’re most proud of.

I tend to suffer from recency bias when writing fics, where I only like the things I’ve written recently, which isn’t fair to my (oh god so big) body of work. So, it’s taken me awhile to think about this.

This Will All Go Down In Flames (E, 77k, SnowBaz)

This is the first fic that really made me feel like a writer. Getting to collab with @tea-brigade & having some amazing alphas/betas like @sillyunicorn, @martsonmars, @bookish-bogwitch, & @cutestkilla. I’d written longfics before, but this was the first time I had a community with me and it made me realize how much more fun writing is with smart people in the trenches alongside me. I also got to add place to a fic for the first time really, celebrating the Austin I knew and miss every day.

boulders turn into sand (E, 19k, SnowBaz)

This is the first fic that I think is really beautiful, and painful in a sweet, aching way. Plus it’s got a banger of a playlist if you ask me. This fic wouldn’t be half as good without @shrekgogurt sliding into my DMs with amazing song recs and I’m so grateful to her ❤️❤️. I know this fic isn’t most people’s bag bc of the infidelity arc, but I consider this a turning point in my writing where I stopped trying so hard to write what I thought people wanted and started to focus on stories about messy people trying their best which is where I find most joy exploring. I think about the end of that fic and Simon/Baz’s slow journey to heal after their “happy ending” all the time. I don’t think I can express how much it meant to have @iamamythologicalcreature make art of Simon toward the end of that fic; he has my whole heart and seeing that moment represented just healed me in such a powerful way.

The Wedding Bet (16k, T, SnowBaz)

This fulfilled my dream of being a sitcom writer lol. Man, I had a blast with this fic and it seems best fitting for a gift for @martsonmars bc it’s funny, tender, smart and witty, all traits Marta exemplifies. I worked so hard on this fic yall hahaha and it’s one of the first fics where I contrived some insane structure and plot devices and I think I pulled it off. Finishing this definitely gave me the confidence to try bigger plots and new devices.

Cursed Ships (Series, various)

I’m cheating here because this is a series, but I think this is such a fun gift to fandoms: writing the cursed ships no one asked for but kind of make sense when you think about it. This is probably one of those areas where I feel unapologetically proud bc it’s hard for me to write in spaces without a lot of covered ground and also to pull off couples you kind of what to hate. And maybe I didn’t hit the mark on these but I’m still glad I tried.

Just Like That (WIP, E, 8k posted, buddie)

Maybe it’s premature to say this is a top fic when I’m still in the process of writing it but oh man I’m so proud of this so far. It feels like all of the heart of TWAGDIF combined with the sweet pain of boulders. This fic is meant as an exercise to see if I can pull off some of the messier themes I’ve got planned in my original novel idea, and so far I think I’m doing it? We’ll see if I stick the landing.

[badasgirlfriend]

hii, can you please write a Jesse Swanson x reader? maybe something fluff or smut if you write, this man doesn't have enough content on this site 😭

I watched Pitch Perfect again and I'm in love with Jesse so I saw your post and I just had to ask, also it's my first time requesting and english is not my first language so sorry if something is wrong!

ur wish is my command🫡 heres a small fluff

i hope u like it<3

Love Me Like a Love Song Baby

pairings: jesse swanson x fem!oc

genre: fluff

a/n: i tried okay😭 for some reasons this was rlly hard for me to write maybe bc he was blindfolded and she couldnt hear shit😭😭 hope u like it<3

Iris was accustomed to Jesse's out-of-the-box ideas, despite often finding them to be outrageous. Still, she couldn't help but find it endearing whenever Jesse proposed his unique and fun ideas. Even if baking while blindfolded and deaf was a tad too much, she couldn't say no to spending time with him. Plus, she admitted that spending time with Jesse was one of her favorite activities.

As she laid the eggs, butter, and other ingredients on the countertop, Iris contemplated how much of a challenge this baking blindfolded endeavor would be. Despite knowing the task would be difficult, Jesse couldn't contain his smiles and excitement.

“Im not enjoying this”

Jesse chuckled as Iris yelled at him, finding her outburst utterly endearing. He tried to tell her that she was being too loud, but she didn't hear him due to the loud music on her headphones. Despite their heated harmless argument, Jesse found Iris's reactions to be adorable. As the scene became more chaotic with Jesse's flour and Iris's yelling, the two couldn't help but crack a smile. Even in their chaotic and embarrassing moments, Jesse and Iris's chemistry was unstoppable.

At Jesse's loving smile, Iris felt her heart fluttering, her eyes glued to his sweet smile. His charming smile made her heart skip a beat, as she felt breathless and unable to turn away from him. It felt like time had stopped, and Jesse and Iris were in a world of their own.

“Jesse!”

“Iris”

Jesse smirked as he dumped a generous handful of oil into the cookie batter, causing Iris's eyes to widen in surprise. As she yelled at Jesse, he laughed covering her mouth with his hand “Shhh you’re being too loud”

Jesse giggled as Iris tried to yell at him, but she couldn't. Iris's words were muffled, and she was unable to get them out. Jesse was enjoying the moment, finding Iris's attempt to yell at him absolutely adorable. As Iris continued to struggle, Jesse's soft chuckles filled the air, making the moment all the more fun and lighthearted. "Let me go!" Iris mumbled, trying to fight Jesse's hand while fighting back a smirk.

“Beg”

After a bit of struggling, Iris got tired and decided to take a different approach. So, she licked Jesse's hand, surprising Jesse and causing him to yell "disgusting" in jest while laughing.

As Jesse and Iris's moment of intimacy continued, Iris suddenly stopped and said "wait." Iris leaned in and wiped the flour off Jesse's cheek, Jesse felt his heart racing from her act of intimacy, but he was hesitant to act on his feelings of wanting to kiss her. What would happen if he did? Jesse wondered, unsure if he should make a move or not.

Jesse playfully teased Iris, saying "Careful, I'm starting to think you like me and can't seem to get enough of me." Iris, who fortunately heard Jesse despite her headphones, rolled her eyes and quipped back, "I think it's the other way around." She tried to hide her blush before playfully smacking Jesse's arm. "You like me, don't you?" Jesse asked playfully, with a smile on his face as if he already knew the answer. Iris paused before finally nodding her head

Thank god he’s blindfolded…

“I said this before” Jesse yelled and leaned closer so she could hear him “Acapella boy acapella girl” he pointed at himself and her “Aca children” Jesse teased

"Don't get ahead of yourself," Iris teased back, but she couldn't help but laugh at Jesse’s face. He had a way of getting her to crack up like no one else.

“Here” The younger girl gave him the chocolate chips, her favorite song started playing, and as she hummed along, her eyes were fixed on Jesse, even as he was still blindfolded. The lyrics "love you like a love song" brought a smile to Iris's face, as she thought about how Jesse made her feel. As she sang in a playful tone, her words "you are beautiful like a dream come alive, incredible" were meant for Jesse, he exhaled and grinned, knowing that Iris wanted to pull him to dance and that he would gladly accept “a centerfold miracle, lyrical you saved my life again”

Iris grabbed Jesse’s hand “and i want you to know baby shake that ass Jessie boy”

“I-I love you like a love song baby”

“Right back at you miss” As the two sang and twirled around, their voices harmonized perfectly, as if they were made for one another. Jesse was extra careful not to bump into anything as he spun Iris around, making sure that their movements were smooth and effortless, complementing one another perfectly. Both Iris and Jesse felt as if they were one with the song, as the joy and euphoria of their dance together filled the room

Jesse and Iris were unaware that they were each singing to each other, only knowing that the lyrics of the song expressed their shared love and adoration for one another.

They were both singing at the top of their lungs, jamming out to the song. As the lyrics "repeat-peat-peat" came on, Jesse began to tickle Iris lightly. Iris giggled in delight, hitting Jesse's shoulders lightly trying to make him stop. Jesse laughed, finding her playful reactions adorable. Their singing quickly turned into a tickling fight, as Jesse continued to try to tickle Iris, who was trying to make him stop. The playful and intimate atmosphere between the two was undeniable, as they smiled at each other as they sang and giggled.

Jesse grabbed Iris wrist making her look at him, he didn't understand what was possessed him to do this. Jesse worked up the courage to say what he had been feeling. In a soft voice, he said "I like you." Although he hoped that Iris hadn't heard him, she stopped dancing and turned to face him. She started laughing as she pointed to her headphones, indicating that she couldn't hear him.

She can’t hear you, he knew that this could be his chance to make a beautiful confession. Jesse took a deep breath, and his words came pouring out like a stream. "Iris, I like you so much. I've wanted to tell you for so long but-”

“Jesse” she giggled “I can’t hear shit” Jesse gave her a sad smile, at least he confessed. The next 30 minutes were awkward. Neither of them said a single thing, too focused on what the brunette boy said

Iris lets a sigh “and we’re done” she starts to clap in excitement, taking off her headphones Jesse took off his blindfold, his eyes took a few seconds to adjust the lightning “now all we need to is put the cookies in the oven and…”

“And wha-“ Iris leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on Jesse's lips. Jesse was caught off guard by Iris's bold action and remained still in surprise. As she pulled away, his heart was still racing and he had trouble processing the emotions that he was feeling. Iris looked at boy she liked with a mix of embarrassment and upset, as she had hoped that he would enjoy the kiss as much as she had. Iris got her message, Jesse didn't kiss her back which means he didn’t like her. This thought made Iris feel hurt, she thought he was being serious about his feelings for her. Yes, she heard everything

His confession earlier made her knees go weak but she was too shocked to even confess her own feelings, that’s why she decided to play it safe and act like she didn’t hear him

Talk about playing safe now

“I-Im sorry I didn-i thought” she embarrassed herself even more by stuttering, she ruined everything, he will probably make fun of her now “Jesse im so-“ she was cut off by Jesse lips crashing into hers

Iris's heart was beating fast as emotions of love and desire flooded her body. Jesse's lips were soft but gentle, and Iris's heart fluttered as she tasted his lips. The moment felt like an eternity, and as their lips parted, Iris's eyes were already filled with tears of joy.

Jesse pulled away from Iris, taking in the sweet moment, as he was also moved by their kiss. Their eyes locked in a moment of understanding and joy, as they both felt that their hearts had finally found each other.

Iris was completely swept away in the moment, her lips clinging back to Jesse's, as she had needed this kiss for so long. Jesse's hold on Iris was tight as his lips kept returning back to hers. As they parted, Jesse kept his gaze on Iris's lips, wanting even more of her sweet scent and flavor. They stood facing each other after their kiss, neither one wanting to be the one to break the spell between them. Their foreheads were touched and their eyes were locked, it was sweet and intimate, and Jesse felt his love for Iris growing with each second passed.

"Never apologize for kissing me, never," Jesse whispered softly to Iris, his voice breaking the spell. Iris was touched by Jesse's words, and they embraced in a loving hug. Kissing Jesse felt like coming home, and Iris's heart was filled with joy.

a/n: im thinking to write a small jesse fanfic (MAYBE) exes to lovers so lemme know if u want ir

[sashascripta]

the mystery woman, part ii (Luke Danes x female!reader)

Hi everyone, I'm so sorry for the lack of update for over a year! Truth be told, I was never planning to follow up on this story. It was just a little project to have fun with, but I saw how many people enjoyed it and wanted to get back into writing, so I hope you enjoy this as well. Since I wasn't certain on the reader's character yet, this still takes place before their date. (Scroll down for Part I)

Luke ran his hand through hair nervously a few times. "Hey, uh, Jess." He glanced over at his sullen nephew, poring over novels that probably weren't for school.

"What," Jess responded in a statement, not a question, as all the Danes men did.

Luke sighed, bracing himself for the favor he was about to entreat. "When you use hair mousse, how much do you actually apply?" He held the jar between three fingers tentatively.

Jess looked up, finally intrigued.

"I mean, I know you use it like water, or shampoo, judging by how often I have to buy shampoo. I tell you, Jess, if you cover your hair in this oily stuff, of course you need lots to wash it off-" Luke started rambling again. He was nervous about his date later that night and found solace in taking it out on his surly nephew.

"Shut up, will you?" Jess stalked towards him, grinning. "Why are you trying to look like you don't fry potatoes for a living?"

Luke smoothened the collar of his leather jacket and turned to Jess. "Hey!" he pointed. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with what I do. I'm just trying to fix myself up tonight. I have a-" he sighed for what seemed the hundredth time that very hour. "I have a date."

"Mrs Slutsky?" Jess prodded.

"(Y/N)!" Luke glared at him. "You don't know her, lucky for her. Not so lucky for you, she seems like an incredibly lady." He cringed, whilst Jess raised his eyebrows, holding back the urge to wiggle them.

"So I assume you've talked to her? Is she a friend of Lorelai?"

"We had a–a brief conversation back in the diner. She's a hotel consultant, here for the inn. But not a friend of Lorelai.

"I don't know. You know I don't do this often, Jess, because I find the whole courting process nauseating. But, I figured, if everything goes to hell, at least she doesn't live here," Luke conceded. He was happy to talk to someone other than Caesar and Patty, who were all too eager to engage in Luke's love life and gossip about what could be. Probably for their morning gossip column, Luke thought with disdain.

"Ah, how romantic. Just the way every great romantic novel starts: if it all goes to hell..."

"Shut up." Luke directed another pointed look to his nephew. "I didn't think you'd have much interest in romantic novels, other than the ones you write in and gift Rory."

Eager to move past the conversation of his love life, Jess quickly screwed open the jar of the conversation starter. "So about the mousse, just scoop up a dollop and run it through your hair. I'm not going to do it for you, because this isn't some stupid–"

"Okay, okay, I get it!" Luke said, quickly following the directions.

Ten minutes later, Luke was ready. He brushed his hair multiple times until Jess made a snarky remark, guided him out the door and promised to lock up after. Although grateful for his nephew's uncharacteristic benevolence, Luke was glad he asked Caesar to check in an hour later.

Luke got in his truck and drove over to the restaurant you agreed to meet at. He enjoyed the hum of the vehicle over the busy highway he either detested or tuned out, focused on the drive instead.

He looked back to his conversation with you. Despite it only occurring a few hours before (well, about 7), he still cringed at nearly everything he said. Did he say he was full of surprises? Not only was that a god awful way of flirting, it was also a lie.

He thought back to what Jess said, watching Luke comb his hair. "So when you were waxing poetic about your future, you said it's okay if it goes to hell because she'd eventually leave. But what if it doesn't go to hell?" Luke cracked a joke about Jess's sudden optimism, enjoying he and his nephew's relatively pleasant moments, engaged in banter, and even confiding in and advising each other.

What if it doesn't go to hell? Luke's head spun. After Anna and Rachel, he assumed heartbreak was around every corner. It was why he avoided new relationships, why he didn't take those chances, why he got back with Rachel so many times. He always wanted to follow every strand of wool to the rest of the ball to see if it was worth it, he couldn't leave a possibility he invested time and effort in, unfinished. That's why he finally approached Lorelai and realized she wasn't the one. But what if you were the one? What then?

His mind raced for a second, before his coping mechanism of overwhelming practicality kicked in. He didn't need to think that much. hell, you barely knew each other.

Luke pulled up before the restaurant, its lights glaring harshly against the dark night sky. He silently cursed the consumerism and skyscrapers in the big city, before he got out of his truck. Change is good, change is necessary. Change leads you to dining with pretty women at 6 o'clock in the evening.

He wasn't sure whether to enter and linger in the waiting area, because he wasn't yet invited in, or to wait outside. The first was awkward. He'd hang around, because his party hadn't arrived yet and people would conjecture that his date didn't show. But waiting outside seemed desperate in his own way, like he was watching you pull in, ready to pounce.

He wished he had a dial by the side of his head, to turn his thoughts off, or at least, to slow them down. He knew nothing about you would make his life easier, because, right now, you overwhelmed him with how cool you seemed. You weren't Lorelai Gilmore or Rachel (what was her last name again?) cool. You turned heads simply by walking in the room and had a quiet, effortless charm about you that just drew him to you. He wished you hadn't such an effect on him, because he was too far in. And because it would hurt so much if you truly did stand him up.

[elvisabutler]

we'll kiss just as before

fandom: elvis 2022 | elvis presley rating: m pairing: elvis presley ( big daddy flavor ) x female reader word count: 1839 warnings: rutting against beds. dry humping so to speak. coming on thighs. breastfeeding kink. light sub elvis. light mommy kink. light dom reader. elvis is a selkie. bit of fingering kind of. use of the words mama. tiny bit of aftercare. brief mention of a rough pregnancy. author’s note: welcome to day 13 of ally’s wet hot smut summer, breastfeeding kink with selkie elvis presley x reader. fun time for context author's note. this takes place in an alternate 1978 where elvis is living his life with his wife, lisa and his now two sons. truth be told anything i write for this series of fics probably will always live in this au ending to elvis's life. probably dying maybe in the 90s/00s. in case anyone ever wants to request more from them even if it's fluff. i was supposed to write a piece before this that explains jesse's origins but time's gotten away from me lately so consider this me doing my normal shenanigan of writing out of order. also if you have no idea what this series/verse is, the masterlist is right here. beyond that long winded author’s note, special thanks to @stylespresleyhearted, @ab4eva and @prompted-wordsmith for being seal!!! at me always. also once again, i really do love how y'all liked this and received it and live to see your thoughts on my writing. and yes i did post these within an hour-ish of each other. because this has been finished for a while. also. divider by @/cafekitsune over here on tumblr.

In the time you've known Elvis— in that small window of his life— you've known him to be an insatiable sort of man. Not gluttonous, though he can err that way, but a man who allows himself to live life with an intensity that makes you proud to call him your husband. On bad nights you wonder what would have happened if your paths had never crossed again because of his skin or if they had never crossed when Anita had broken up with him. Those nights are few and far between though, soothed away with a stepdaughter who you adore, a son you carried in your belly for nine excruciatingly long months and a little baby boy adopted by a selkie who took one look at a little baby seal and told you that he was your son— told you it was God's way of providing the two of you with another child without the risk of your health. It's a blessing John was still young enough to be suckling at your breasts when you adopted Jesse. It's a blessing that at the young baby's cries your breasts rose to the occasion, swelling up like they did when John was a newborn, leaking at inopportune times and causing Elvis to laugh in sheer delight that his wife— his perfect seal wife— had so much milk within her breasts that it came out even when no one was there to catch it but him.

No, you've always known that Elvis is an insatiable sort of man, and nights like this remind you of it as you climb into bed, taking in the sight of him naked as the day he was born, glasses perched on his nose as he reads quietly. Your eyes roam over his body, watching his rounded stomach rise and fall, wetness from sweat or perhaps a shower causing the hair on it to stick to him reminding you that despite being a seal he's practically a bear when it comes to the hair on his chest and belly. You feel yourself clenching around nothing the longer you stare and yet you don't speak, don't put into words your thoughts even as Elvis starts to shut his book and glances over at you, eyes zeroing in on your breasts.

"They're still lookin' full," he murmurs, moving to set his book on the nightstand next to him. "He ain't eaten?"

Your hands move to take off his glasses as you shrug, hissing slightly as Elvis moves his hand against the fuller of your two breasts. "No, he's eating, but— not enough tonight. He's full, but so are they."

There's a question in the words you speak, a request for Elvis if he's willing to grant you it, but you hate the mere idea of asking for it. Sure, Elvis has done it for you before but— only when it's started to leak on his chest when you're pressed against him or when it's started to make a mess of the bed. Asking him outright tonight feels wrong and you feel a hint of embarrassment despite everything go through you. As if Elvis can sense it, his hand that isn't on your breast moves to cup your chin. "Darlin'. They ache, don't they?"

The answering nod you give him is slow and controlled before you exhale quietly. "They're gonna be hard as rocks before he wakes up again."

"You need more out of 'em, don't ya? Make it so it doesn't hurt so much in all that time." He says it as a question but you and him both know it's more of a statement than anything else. "I ain't gonna mind."

If you ask him to do it. You know that's what he's telling you and yet you can't help the way you bite at your lip and watch as his thumb brushes over your exposed nipple, a bit of milk dribbling out as he does. Without missing a beat he puts his thumb in his mouth and sucks it, his tongue swirling around the digit as he stares you down, blue eyes somehow containing every bit of the depths of the ocean in them. He's your husband, this is— this is what your insatiable husband is willing to do for you and you've been looking the gift horse in the mouth. After a moment, one of your hands moves to cup the underside of the breast his hand had been on as you speak.

"Can you please? Mama's— Mama's got all this milk and I can't— I can't sleep with them aching like this."

It's as if you've granted the man salvation when he looks at you through eyelashes that have charmed so many women. He hadn't planned sucking on your breasts tonight, truthfully but it was always a gift when he could. You've taken care of him since that fluke meeting when you didn't even know who he was. When you thought he was just a seal that gotten a handkerchief tied around him. With this act of allowing him to drink from your breasts he could take care of you and indulge in something that helped him sleep better than any pill ever had. You could take care of him just by letting him have the simple pleasure of sucking at your breasts. It's different than when he does it when you're not nursing, but even so there's an element that's the same. There's that element that has you squirming and clenching your thighs as he drinks milk that he shouldn't want.

He places his hand over yours, the warmth of it inadvertently making you shiver and causing your nipple to harden and you hear the shaky breath he takes as he just stares at it. His tongue darts out to lick his lips before he shifts in the bed and places your nipple in his mouth.

"El— Elvis," you stammer out his name as his tongue runs across your nipple, teasing and only gathering the faintest of drops before he forms that little bit of suction with his lips. His suckling is gentle, knowing that he barely needs to pull for his little treat. Your relief is almost immediate though, your shoulders relaxing as you lean back against the pillows, hearing the soft sounds of his sucking and the sound of him swallowing every so often.

Sometimes you watch him when he sucks at you, cradling his head like a child. Those nights are the nights this action is purely for comfort and for the intimacy of being with one another without any of the children. Those nights are special and remind you that it's a bit of a fluke that you're a part of his life. They remind him how you're the perfect seal wife and how you came into his life at just the right time. The first time you met hadn't been perfect, hadn't been right, but the second time, this time was.

Nights like this though? Nights like this you find yourself with your head leaning back against the pillows, soft pants leaving your lips as your fingers thread through his hair and pull every so often. You've been aching in more than one way for Elvis and it shows in how after just a minute your thighs are clenched as you try and shift, only to be stopped by his chest and torso pinning you down with his bulk. You open your mouth to speak, to tell Elvis to pull away from the breast he's suckling on only to realize he's rutting against the bed. You hadn't known he needed this too. You hadn't known that you both had been craving this way of being together for what feels like forever even though it had only been a week.

A groan or a growl rumbles deep within Elvis's chest and you mirror it with a gasp as starts to suck harder, adding enough pressure that you can feel the throbbing in between your legs. Touching you would be ideal, feeling the calloused tips of his fingers against your clit would be ideal. Anything but a lack of touch would be ideal and yet you feel your arousal starting to ruin the panties you wear to bed. Words dance on your lips even as you tighten your grip on Elvis's hair, pulling him off your nipple with a small pop noise. Looking up at you with dilated pupils he uses his strength to pull his head back down to attack your other nipple. A whine leaves your lips unbidden as a fresh wave of desire courses through you and has you clenching around nothing and thrusting against his torso. Yet he doesn't stop, his lips still stay around your nipple, filling his mouth with your milk even as you look down and see some spilling from the sides of his mouth.

The look he wears is ravenous and you find yourself starting to thrust and move your hips to get any sort of friction. A whimper leaves your lips. "Please."

The sensation of Elvis's lips curling around your nipple into a smirk should have you pulling him off once again and yet you find that you just thrust once more. All that matters is chasing the high Elvis has started to bring you and somehow as your hand yanks at his hair again he finally takes pity on you. He doesn't bother to take off your panties, though, no, he merely takes one more final suck from your breast and shifts to allow himself to pin you down. The air feels as if it's been sucked out of your lungs when his lips meet yours, the sweetness of rogue breastmilk drops falling on your lips. Elvis is rutting against you, not bothering to enter you but the friction is enough, the feel of his bare cock brushing against your clothed vagina has your toes curling. One of your hands moves to his behind and as your release finally comes you grab his ass and squeeze, puling him in closer. His own release follows shortly after, painting your thighs with his cum. Flopping against you he takes deep breaths for a few minutes before finally speaking.

"Didn't— Didn't know ya needed me that bad," he jokes before nuzzling at you. "Didn't know ya needed that so bad."

Your words come out a little slurred as you feel your body starting to drift off to sleep. "Neither did I. Just— We needed that." Your tone, despite the slurred words leaves no room for argument. "Clean then sleep?"

Clean both of you off, then come to bed is what you mean but you know your little seal can translate from the way he moves to get off of you. He walks slowly to the bathroom and in the doorway of that room he looks back at you. You've already fallen asleep and it warms something inside of him to see you finally allowing yourself to relax.

"That's it, darlin', get you some rest."

taglist: @ab4eva , @blurredcolour, @butlersxbirdy, @precious-little-scoundrel, @eliseinmemphis, @prompted-wordsmith, @missmaywemeetagain, @lookingforrainbows, @araxw, @thatbanditqueen, @ellie-24, @austinbutlersgirl67, @heartbrake-hotel, @ccab, @18lkpeters, @slutforsomegoodlettuce, @dkayfixates, @kendralavon7, @chasingwildflowers, @notstefaniepresley, @wanderingelvis, @kxnnxy, @powerofelvis, @stylespresleyhearted, @be-my-ally, @mooodyblue, @pixiedustcosmos, @jessicarcates, @amydarcimarie, @flwrs4aust, @myradiaz, @adaydreamaway08. if you weren't tagged it's not a slight. it's literally me copy and pasting from old tag lists.

[frazzledsoul]

The thing about S6 Jess Mariano is that there is simultaneously too much of him and not enough.

I've been watching old episodes recently because of a story I've been writing on and off for a week, and I don't think people truly appreciate the amount of set-up that went into Jess's scenes in The Real Paul Anka. In this show, there are supporting cast members who almost never get scenes of their own outside of interacting with the girls and various townies. I think Paris has exactly one scene that doesn't involve Lorelai or Rory. Dean has a handful. Sookie has just one off the top of my head. I believe Logan has one as well. All of these people were on the show far, far longer than Jess was. It seems only Luke, Lane, and Jess have a lot of scenes with characters other than Lorelai and Rory...and in season 6, Jess has not been seen for two years and has not been a main cast member for three. We get an introduction to his place of work, he has interactions ALONE (!) with his friends/coworkers, we get an extended sequence where he explains to Luke how exactly his job works and where he lives, he has significant interactions with both Luke, April, and Rory, and closes out the last we see of his relationship with Luke in the OS on a good note. None of the other love interests get this, because while we spend more time with them, they are not developed as individuals outside of Rory. Dean is the good boyfriend who unexpectedly leads Rory into an affair and who we last see chafing at her desire to leave him behind, while Logan is the rich, dangerous boyfriend who entices Rory into the elitist world that Lorelai sought to escape from and who will eventually lead her astray because he is unable to escape from his father's expectations, forcing Rory to repeat the life patterns of her mother (God, I hate the AYITL ending. It blows). Jess is his own person, whose existence is not completely defined by Rory, but who eventually inspires her to seek out the path that she wants by virtue of his own example. And at the end of the story, he is the one door left open, the one person who is working with her on her goals and is still involved with her life.

(This is why I chafe when people say Jess wasn't endgame, even after all of these years. One of the last things ASP said about a follow-up is that she was going to chase Milo and Alexis down and make them do it. Her intentions were pretty obvious, even for those of us like me who don't necessarily hate Logan).

What's so great about S6 Jess is that almost all of the stuff that made him a terrible boyfriend and such a damaged, tortured character during his original run on the show has been smoothed over. He meets Rory on her terms and makes plans at her convenience: he acknowledges her discomfort: he is far more concerned with her than busting the chops of her boyfriend (although that part is clearly fun, too). He's considerate, social, a person who makes plans and follows up on them. He's confident yet self-effacing: when Rory is found to be using him, he reminds her of the boundary she's crossed yet doesn't lash out. It doesn't change his feelings overall: she isn't choosing him at the time being, but he still cares about her. Even though we leave him with a broken heart, we know he's got a life beyond her, something he didn't have when we last saw him in season 3 and season 4. He has friends, a purpose, a respected place in his community: he will be okay. It's a better place than we leave Dean and likely a better place than we leave Logan in AYITL. He will be okay.

I'm of the mind that Jess's participation in the last season of the OS has less to do with the writing team changing (although I don't think Milo was particularly keen on working with the new guys, either) and more to do with what else Milo was working on at the time. Heroes was a huge, huge deal when it first came out and networks aren't always amenable to lending out their actors to work for their competitors. I just don't think it was possible for Jess to show up no matter who was writing that season. I do occasionally wonder what the S7 writers would have done with him. It doesn't escape my scrutiny that the show skips the actual Christmas holiday because Rory was in London, because Jess almost certainly would have traveled to Stars Hollow to visit his mom and newborn sister and comfort his depressed uncle. There certainly were a lot of uses for him that had nothing to do with Rory.

AYITL Jess is of course more or less the same, only with bigger arm muscles and some of the edges smoothed out: the main difference is that we see he's been more or less accepted into the Gilmore/Danes clan and is a more active support system for Luke and his mother.

At this late stage in the game, I'm not expecting or wanting a follow-up and I think odds are very much against there ever being one. I do wish that knowing that AYITL was all there was that they had given us more time with Jess (if possible) and that there was some sort of definitive end for him and Rory instead of the door just being swung wide open and an indication of a future (and of course, Jess being a total dreamboat). However, as with all things ASP, you take what you can get and what was given to us here wasn't that bad.

Those last four words still suck, though.