#god do I wish I had a dishwasher
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in my can’t do dishes era again
#nothing important#they're just piling and piling and piling and there's no end to this#god do I wish I had a dishwasher#I don't even prepare meals apart from a toast and coffee why is this happening#(the answer is that the dishes are 90% coffee mugs and plates I carried the toasts on)
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I thought the october curse was gonna be skipped this year based on the fact I got a job on the first day but like. it turns out that was the bad luck disguising itself at good news and it's just another normal october
#i think a lot about how july 2020 was mediocre and july 2021 was one of the worst months of my life#and i made it known that i didn't trust july anymore. and it must've taken that as constructive criticism and my god it listened to me#bc then july 2022 was one of the best months of my life#and the two julys since have been pretty good as well#like that is so nice from july what a good friend#CANNOT say the same for october. like since 2014 every single one has been significantly terrible (except 2015 and maybe 2018)#2014 depressed. 2016 no friends depressed. 2017 giving nothing. 2019 dropped from what was a really good year#2020 like every mental illness known to man. 2021 All the horrors happening at once. 2022 the aromantic's worst nightmare#2023 was just awful#and then 2024's theme is having an absolutely miserable job after like 15 months of unemployment#i only get 3 days off and i can't even enjoy them bc i know what they're leading to#my shifts are too short to be allowed breaks but way too long for that to be comfortable#there've been times the day before a shift when i think about going and end up feeling nauseous and that's never even happened before lol#i get paid in like week apparently so i might try and wait until then but like#also the worst part is it's basically what i did when i was 17 (kitchen porter/assistant/whatever) so i keep comparing them#except there were parts of that job i enjoyed like the dishwasher and the cool shower looking tap and doing the plates and cutlery etc#and also the people i worked with. and the shifts weren't too bad. and i had a glorious hyperfixation#anyway this job is none of those things it's actually all the things i specifically disliked about the other one lol#i miss the dishwasher she was so cool. i miss the hyperfixation i had in 2017 (but when do i not)#but yeah i guess the only advantages of this job is I'll have money again and it's more motivation to look for another job#once again wishing i was 17 bc she wasn't happy and had no friends or aim in life but she listened to a lot of music so#idk why i always get addicted to 2017 nostalgia maybe bc it was such a mediocre year#like if i start wishing I was 13 or 15 or 19 or 22 I'm just gonna get depressed bc they were so good#but there's no reason for me to want to be 23 or 20 or 16 or 14 bc like. what is there to want about those#but 17 is so average it's like a low enough standard or something idk. anyway#ramble
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i dont understand how the dishes are already dirty when i just did the dishes
#god i wish i had a dishwasher#or even someone to help with the dishes every once in a while#having to do the shopping cooking AND cleaning has just completely ruined any joy cooking used to have for me
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Touch Me Baby
pairing: modern!steve harrington x modern!fem!reader
wc: 21.7k
cw: mad flirting, swearing, use of the f slur once, shattering glass, alcohol, drinking, weed, smoking, brief mentions of suicide, mentions of cheating, men being weird and implications of harassment, smut, 18+ mdni, fingering, p in v, oral (f recieving), minor praise kink, edging, teasing, multiple orgasms, wrap it before you tap it kids
a/n: set in modern times with phones and everything! i've never written anything this long before, and I really hope you guys like it!!
steve harrington masterlist
“You literally look so fucking hot oh my god.”
You rolled your eyes and checked yourself out in the mirror, smirking slightly. “I can feel you objectifying me Birdy.”
Robin rolled her eyes and collapsed on to your bed, staring up at the ceiling. “I just think it’s unfair that you aren’t so emotionally and deeply in love with me.”
“Hey.” You peered over your shoulder, “I told you that I’d be your lesbian lover the second you needed one.”
She sighed and sat up on her elbows. “Yeah, but I don’t want you to do me out of pity. I want you to love me.”
You walked over and kissed her head. “ I do love you.”
“Yeah Yeah. As a friend.” She teased as you laughed and moved over to your vanity.
“Just because you’re not my type doesn't mean I don’t think you’re showstoppingly gorgeous.”
“Are you trying to get into my pants Y/l/n?” Robin teased.
“You wish Buckley.”
Robin let out the most over-dramatic sigh and collapsed on your bed again, giggling after a moment.
You laughed at her antics and checked out your makeup, your earrings, and your rings in the mirror next to your door. “Is this cute enough?”
“Did I not just say how hot—”
You and Robin had lived together for about three years now. You had become fast friends freshman year and then roommates for the last three years of your college experience. The apartment you shared was perfect because it had two bedrooms, one bathroom, and the price didn’t rise once in your entire time living in NYC. The best perk of them all was having a home phone. It was reminiscent of your childhood and you both handed out your home phone number to everyone, enjoying the messages you received from anyone and everyone.
It rang and immediately went to voicemail, as Robin had set it on vacation mode the second you moved in meaning every single phone call went directly to voicemail so you could both hear who it was. A man’s voice rang out through your shared apartment.
“Hey it’s Steve, I just landed and I’m on my way to your place, I think it’s only a twenty-minute drive but I wanted to alert the household I was on my way.”
You looked over at Robin, slightly uneasy. “I can’t believe I’m finally meeting him.”
Robin shrugged and her smile was a bit brighter. Her two best friends were about to meet, and maybe even hit it off and they could be a friend group—but Robin was getting ahead of herself.
“You’re going to like him. The same level of snark, but definitely a softie under it all. And he’s my best friend, so I wouldn’t be friends with him if he sucked.”
You crossed your arms. “I’m going to pretend like you didn’t just call him your best friend in front of me and say that, I know he’s one of your best friends, which is why I’m worried. What if he thinks I’m a huge bitch or something, or like…I don’t know.”
“He’ll love you.”
You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Well. We have twenty minutes to fix up the house so that he doesn’t think we’re complete and total slobs or anything.”
The two of you spent the next seventeen minutes unfolding your futon couch bed, frantically shoving trash in trash bins, and stuffing the dishwasher with dishes. You definitely weren’t slobs by any means, but sometimes it was easier to leave wine glasses or bottles on the coffee table, or just toss your bra onto the chair since you didn’t want to wear one anymore or…
“Which candle?”
You rolled your eyes as you grabbed the extra pillows from your room. “Does it matter?” You yelled back to Robin.
“I don’t know!”
“Well, he’s your home best friend. So whatever you think would suit the straight man you’re friends with.” You walked out and placed the two pillows on the pull-out bed.
“Okay, I’m going with Midnight Citrus because it’s my favorite and he can suck it up.”
“Whatever you say, girl….”
Both of your heads turned when you heard the knock on the door. Robin literally shrieked as she barreled towards the door and you swear you could hear Steve laugh through it.
Robin definitely knocked something over on her way over and you spent the next thirty seconds picking up the bowl and its contents from off the floor.
You had seen pictures of Steve before. There were plenty around the house of the two of them by themselves or with other friends from their hometown, so you knew Steve was an attractive man, but something about seeing him in person was a whole different beast.
And there were no pictures in the apartment to prep you for the fact that he had these thin wire-framed glasses. You could have sworn he sucked the literal breath out of you.
“It’s nice to finally meet you.” Steve smiled that same lopsided smile you had seen on the walls and you probably would have dragged him back to your bedroom right then and there if Robin wasn’t standing right there and staring at you with the most hopeful look on her face you had seen since her breakup during sophomore year.
“It’s uh, it’s so good to finally meet you too. Heard so much about you.” You smiled at him and kept your hands awkwardly in your back pockets.
Steve nodded. “Same here. She actually doesn’t shut up about you.”
“I could say the same thing.”
“Okay, no need to be rude.” Robin huffed and haphazardly tossed Steve’s bags onto the couch.
You and Steve shared a quick look, both of you trying not to laugh.
“Ready to go Stevie boy? I know you just landed but it’s a Friday and I want to go out.”
He nodded. “I remember the text you sent me like last week as a reminder Robs. I just have to change.”
“The bathroom is the second door on the right.” You smiled at him and watched as he grabbed things.
You looked over at Robin. “Where exactly do you want to go out?”
Steve passed by you and you caught a hint of the cologne he had put on this morning. He closed the door and you had to blink a few times. “Sorry, where did you say?”
“I was thinking we could just go to the Cubbyhole…”
“Robin, we are not taking him to Cubbyhole and ruining our reputation there.”
“It’s literally not that big of a deal.”
“Babe, we are not bringing your straight man friend to a lesbian bar.”
“Fine then—”
“And definitely not Henrietta’s either.” You cut her off.
Robin crossed her arms. “ Well, then where do YOU want to take him? Because I’m not going to—”
“Girl, please. It’s like you have no faith in me. Who showed you both of those bars in the first place?”
“Fine then.”
You smiled at your victory and watched as Robin walked over to the little whiteboard you had in the hallway. Robin erased the bottom half of the words but kept the tally up top. “So where are we going tonight?”
“Are you okay with more of a just ‘sitting and drinking’ bar instead of clubbing tonight? Or at least we start at a bar and then move on to clubs?”
Robin’s face twisted, but then she conceded. “Ugh, fine.”
“Why don’t we start at Nothing Really Matters?”
“Which one is that?”
Steve popped out of the bathroom right as Robin asked that question, causing you to stutter a bit in your answer.
Steve was wearing these blue jeans that fit his thighs his ass him so well, and some clearly well-loved white Nike sneakers. But what got you was the shirt combo he was wearing. A tight black tee, covered by a short-sleeved patterned button-up, that was unbuttoned and just tight enough to fuck you up.
Plus, you were sure you saw a silver chain around his neck, which made you wonder what it would look like when if he was above you.
“I-I…um. It’s the one in.” You bit the inside of your cheek and looked back at Robin. “The one in the 50th Street subway station.”
Robin raised her eyebrow at you, but you just shook your head, deciding to ignore what just happened and barrel through.
“A bar in a subway station?”
You smiled over at Steve. “It’s not as gross as it sounds. I swear. It’s one of my favorite little spots that not a lot of people know about so there’s almost always seating and they have really good drinks there too. Besides, it’s in the station so if Robin wants to abandon us for some clubbing then the train is right there.”
He nodded and put his stuff away, while you looked back over at Robin who was making a face at you.
“What?”
She huffed and went into the kitchen.
When you just stared at her, confused, she aggressively made a small wave for you to follow her. You sighed and obliged, managing to walk directly into Steve’s chest because you weren’t paying attention.
“Shit! Sorry.” Your hands were against his chest while he had one of his hands on your waist.
“N-no it’s fine.” He gave you a sheepish smile and quickly pulled his hand off your waist, but your skin was covered in goosebumps from how close you two were.
You quickly hurried into the kitchen where Robin was impatient tapping her foot. “Seriously?”
“W-what?” you smoothed down the front of your top, trying not to look up at her.
“You know what.”
“Birdy I–”
“No, save it. I don’t want to fight. I just want to know why you’re so against going clubbing tonight when that was the original plan.”
If you were to tell Robin the truth, it would be because you weren’t sure you wouldn’t end the night with her best friend in your bed, kissing him like the world was ending, doing things that would have her kicking you out of the apartment and her life.
Or maybe it’s because you want to spend the entire night just talking to Steve and listening to his voice and learning every single thing about him. After all, you were utterly entranced.
“I just, I worked all day, and now that we’re actually going out…I don’t know if I have the energy to go all out.” This wasn’t a lie, it just wasn’t the full truth. You had worked twelve hours today, and even before Steve had arrived, you had been dreading going out anyway.
Robin’s face twisted a little bit. “It’s Steve's first time visiting me in the city and I wanted to show him around and show him all the places that I get to have fun.”
“And for him to have a friend for when you inevitably win the bartender’s number tonight and go back with her to her place….”
Robin’s cheeks turned bright red and she huffed again. “What–no–okay so maybe a bit but–”
“Look, babe, if you want to go to the Cubbyhole, I am more than supportive of that, it’s just that it’s not what I’m in the mood for. You could always ask Steve to go with you. Or ask him what he wants. And if he’s okay with going out, we can all start at the bar, and then we can split up based on how we are all feeling. Steve literally just got off of a plane not even an hour ago.”
The two of you agreed on a plan and walked back into the living room, where Steve had been shifting his bags around, and had his phone open.
“Are we ready?” He stood up and smiled at the both of you.
You both nodded and smiled at one another. One of you was excited to start the night. And the other was dreading what would happen when Robin inevitably left you alone with her hot best friend from home.
_________________________________________________________________________
The three of you had managed to snag one of the tables up against the wall of the bar. Steve sat on one side, and you sat on the other, with Robin between you. It was the perfect setup for everyone since Robin was in between her two favorite people on the planet, and you got to look at Steve frequently because he was in your direct line of sight.
It was most definitely the alcohol, or maybe it wasn’t, but Steve was getting more attractive by the minute.
“I’ll go get us another round!” Robin excitedly grabbed all three glasses and ran back off to the bar to get more drinks. While you were so grateful that it was going so well, you couldn’t help but Steve was feeling the same way you were.
Were you such a bad friend if you were actually excited for Robin to leave the two of you alone together?
“So how did you meet Robin?”
You blinked a few times before looking over at Steve. It was dimly lit, but you were seated next to the lamp on the wall, so he was bathed in a red glow. He must have been some sort of Greek god or something because no one can look that good in any lighting at all times.
“She didn’t tell you already?”
Steve shook his head, smiling slightly.
You bit your cheek again and smiled. “Okay so. We met in our first year here, and I wanted to beat the shit out of her, oh my god, she like, never shut up. And while I love her for it now, it was causing some strained tensions between the two of us. So we were in the same class and got partnered for a project about Women’s history, specifically, authors who we deemed as important. And so I offered up Toni Morrison, who is probably my favorite author of all time, and Miss Indiana over there told me that her books were mediocre at best and wanted to do a project about Virginia Woolf. Then I called her gay, and she freaked out. Not in the aggressive way you’re thinking, but simply because I knew she was a queer woman, and it freaked her out that someone could tell. Like only a gay woman picks Virginia Woolf.”
Steve’s eyebrows furrowed a little bit, and you could tell he was unsure about the path this story was taking, but you continued on.
“She ended up letting me win the argument and we put together the most beautiful slideshow on god’s green earth. I mean, seriously to this day, I think about the transitions. A good PowerPoint can make or break a class—anyway. After that, Robin didn’t speak to me for the rest of the week.”
“Which is valid because I thought she was going to fucking hate crime me since my experience with people knowing I’m gay is either Steve or getting called a fag so…” Robin placed the drinks down in front of the respective people and sat down on her stool.
“Until…” You took a sip of your drink, cutting her off so you could finish the story.”We attended the same party that Friday night at Vickie’s house—I’m assuming you know all about Vickie and the mess that was—anyway. We were at Vickie's place and I went into the kitchen where some girls were making fun of Birdy and calling her some really awful shit because she was from Cowland, and so I called them all a bunch of cunts and then defended my homegirl because women support women, especially queer women. Then she kissed me, and—she’s actually not that bad of a kisser if I’m being so honest with you—and then we’ve been best friends since.”
“I’m a phenomenal kisser, excuse you.”
You smiled and nudged her with your elbow. “Sure thing Birdie. You’re nowhere near the bottom of my list though. I think Malcolm is—remember him?”
Robin burst into laughter. Steve looked between the two of you, extremely confused by the entire situation—it was written all over his face.
“He used to—” You couldn’t breathe because of how hard you were laughing. The sentence was virtually unfinishable. “He-He would…” You tried to take a few breaths. “He would, uh, spray cologne in his mouth instead of using a mint because he thought that’s what it was for—”
You and Robin collapsed against one another, back into your fits of laughter. This had Steve cracking up, not just at the fact that this man was stupid, but because you and Robin’s laughs were contagious.
“She didn’t figure it out until the fourth date.” Robin blurts out, causing you to wipe away the tears in your eyes and shove her slightly.
“Shut UP. I only kissed him like twice before then and it was just pecks.”
You caught a glance of Steve out of the corner of your eye, and he was looking right at you. Your breath caught in your throat for a moment and the two of you stopped time for a moment. The corner of Steve’s mouth quirked up into a smile before he broke eye contact and looked back at Robin.
“Wood in the mouth takes a whole new meaning—”
“Oh please. Don’t even start with that—”
“I’m just saying your choices in partners–”
“At least I didn’t date a married woman–”
“WHAT.”
Your eyes widened and you looked at Steve. “She didn’t tell you?”
Robin started hitting your arm. “No. I. did. Not!”
You laughed and used one of your hands to shove hers away from you. “It was like a three-month relationship but she realized–”
Robin shifted tactics and clamped a hand over your mouth so you couldn’t finish the sentence. After a moment she made a gagging sound and quickly pulled her hand away. “Did you just fucking lick my hand?”
You winked at her and looked back at Steve. “She knew this woman’s wife too. A month into dating Robs found out. Rough semester.”
“Oh my god. Robin. Who are you? What else have you done that I don’t know about?”
“That’s it. If you’re going to tell him all of my wrongdoings, I’m out.” Robin downed her drink and stood up. She kissed your cheek and grabbed her purse off of the chair she was sitting on.
“Remember to wear protection there kid.”
She rolled her eyes at you and turned towards Steve. “I know I—”
“Robs, seriously, it’s okay. Go have fun. I have been traveling all day. And I don’t mind talking to Y/n—”
“Unlike someone here, I’m not going to abandon you, Steve, don’t worry.”
Steve’s hand rested over his heart. “You’re too kind.”
Robin scoffed but was smiling the whole time. “Don’t wait up. Mom, Dad, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
And with that, she left you and Steve sitting in the bar.
“So Steve, what else do you want to know about our girl??”
The two of you spent the next three hours sitting at the bar, ordering drink after drink. Eventually, you and Steve were knee to knee, your head on his shoulder when you laughed too hard, trading stories about Robin. Nice didn’t even begin to describe the way his cologne smells when you would rest your head on his shoulder, giggling about something he said. Or the way his hand felt when it rested on your thigh as the two of you talked and talked and talked.
Or when the two of you couldn’t stop giggling on the subway as you told him about the time Robin threw up on someone on the subway after you both had been drinking all day during last year’s Saint Patrick’s Day.
Or when you stumbled slightly on the street, clinging to Steve as he clung to you. Enjoying the sound of his voice as he whispered things into your ear.
Or as your back was up against the wall next to your door, you watched Steve’s hands use the key and unlock your door, except both of you forgot the fact that the bolt was also locked, meaning Steve slammed his face right into the door since it wasn’t moving. You clamped your hand over your mouth, dying of laughter, watching as Steve tried not to laugh at the door himself, instead smiling brightly at you, with his head against the door.
Or when you both stood in the hallway of your apartment, neither one of you wanting the night to end, toeing the line. Eyes pretending they weren’t staring at lips. Hands fluttering around, almost grabbing one another. An inch away from more than just friends.
______________________________________________________________________________
The next morning, you awoke to an empty apartment and a text from Robin saying that the two of them decided to “hit the town”.
You took your time. Decidedly talking yourself out of everything that had happened last night, especially when Robin had left you and Steve alone. It was dumb of you to even think about potentially betraying Robin’s trust like that. She didn’t bring Steve here to add him to your collection of failed lovers—and even if she did, you had a sinking feeling that Robin would choose Steve.
It’s not to say that she didn’t love you, adore you, and wish nothing but the best for you, but you wish to never even put her in that position.
So instead, you decided to take your mind off of everything by spending the afternoon in one of your favorite little hole-in-the-wall coffee shops that was only a few minutes walk away from your place.
You had managed to snag your favorite seat: a comfortable chair next to the window, and a plug. The plug was the best part since it meant you rarely had to get up and could just charge your devices without having to leave the spot you were in for potentially hours. And today was one of those days. The collection of mugs on the table grew as the hours of the day went on. By the time hour four had rolled around, there were about five mugs and two plates.
That’s when the world did that thing again, when it decided to start ruining your day. First, your laptop was overheating more than usual, which was just plain irritating. Then, they had run out of the panini you were going to get for lunch. The final straw, however, was when one of your exes came waltzing up to the table.
“Y/n, it’s been so long. How are ya?”
You tried not to let a full resting bitch face take over, but to any observer, you were not happy to see the man in front of you. “Malcolm. Hey. I’m good.”
“I’m doing great too. Mind if I sit? I just can’t believe I ran into you here.”
Your breath hitched and that little voice in your head screamed panic!
“Um—actually, well, I come here all the time and you know that…Second, this seat's taken.”
“Well I’ve been here for about five minutes now and no one has taken that seat–”
“You’ve been watching me for five minutes? That’s fucking creepy Malcolm.” You tapped your finger against your keyboard nervously, eyes darting around, hoping someone would catch on to how uncomfortable this was for you.
“Please. That chair isn’t for anyone now is it?”
“Oh I’m sorry, am I interrupting something?”
It’s still unsure if you audibly let out a sigh of relief seeing Steve approach the table, and take the seat next to you.
Malcolm crossed his arms and rolled his eyes. “Look bud, I don’t know if you’re trying to play the hero card here by swooping in to try and save some damsel in distress you don’t know just to get her number, but you can right fuck off.”
Steve turned and looked at you. “Is he bugging you, Y/n? Because I’ll fucking kick his ass…”
You smiled and placed your hand on top of Steve’s thigh under the table, where Malcolm couldn’t see. You gave it a squeeze, hoping to god he understood how grateful you were at the moment for him. “Steve, this is Malcolm…you remember…from the other night.”
“Shut the fuck up—this is cologne guy?”
You nodded. Throughout the rollercoaster of being approached by an ex who was kind of threatening you, inside your favorite coffee shop, while you were alone, your heart rate shot up. Your heart was pounding. But when Steve put his hand on top of yours, you thought your heart rate would skyrocket.
And then the weirdest thing happened, it didn’t. Steve started rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand, and your heart rate went down. If this was on purpose, you might never know, but this simple gesture from someone you have known for mere hours had your breathing even out and your heart rate slide back down to within reason.
Wasn’t it written somewhere that love makes your heart beat out of your chest?
That love makes your soul bleed and your eyes weep. Love is supposed to make you crazy and worship the other person till the ends of the earth. It’s supposed to be overwhelming and make you feel like you could burst just from how much love you hold within yourself. It was a disease, unable to be cured—a madness. It’s all-consuming, unforgiving, a fire that cannot be tamed. Something you willingly killed yourself for. Ended it all because the idea of losing it was a fate worse than death
What you’re feeling couldn’t be love then. That’s what you had decided. You weren’t going batshit crazy over the idea of risking your life for him or losing your mind over the thought that he might not love you back. It was just a plain and simple joy: sitting next to him, his hands on yours.
Your heartbeat had found its way back to normal, and your mind began to refocus on the confrontation in front of you.
By the time your vision refocused after the thirty seconds you managed to blackout, Malcolm was glaring at Steve but starting to walk away. Whatever Steve said, worked, and you looked over at him, confused. " I think I must have blacked out or something because how the hell did you get him to..."
Steve shrugged. "If you missed it, you missed it."
"You're joking right?"
Steve shrugged and smiled. His hand was still on yours, but you completely forgot about it—
"What are you working on?"
—Til now.
You begrudgingly took your hand away from his and brought it up to the keyboard of your laptop, clicking it awake so he could see what you had been working on. The two of you spent the next hour sitting and talking about your courses, which were all a bunch of nonsense anyway since you were a second-semester senior with barely anything to do.
"You're taking a metal-welding class for credit?"
You smirked and nodded. "When I tell you college is a joke, I truly mean it. I kind of love it though. Robin, however, dislikes being outlesbianed by someone who is not a lesbian. But I think I'm getting pretty good at it too."
_____________________________________________________________________________
Two hours later, you and Steve found yourselves as the last two in the coffee shop, still talking about anything and everything you possibly could—wherever the conversation led you.
When it was time to get kicked out, Steve helped pack up your things, and you both started the short walk back to the apartment where you ended up raiding the "delinquent Cabinet" as it had been affectionately named and properly labeled.
By the time Robin got home from her shift, you and Steve had demolished a joint, several shooters, half a bottle of prosecco, and half a bottle of vodka. The conversation had never stopped, with the two of you always finding some way to stay touching to one another. You couldn't deny that the feeling of Steve calmed you down immensely, and the courage you were feeling from the past few hours helped with the want to have your hands on him.
But when Robin walked into your apartment, you and Steve sobered up a tiny bit, deciding to leave some space between you both. You missed the way his hand felt on your calf, absentmindedly massaging it as the two of you talked about the difference between weed from Indiana and weed from a major city.
“Hey you two…”
“Birdy!” You exclaimed. Your eyes were fading away from the red of smoking, but your smile was lazy and your body felt heavy, but not in a bad way.
“Ah, I see we broke into your stash?”
You smirked slightly, and nodded. “Well if Mr. Harrington is going to smoke good weed, no offense to your friend back home, then he needs the best.”
“Eddie sells good weed.” Steve defended his friend from home but it just made you giggle.
“Steve, that joint you gave me tasted like the equivalent of watered down vodka. It’s good, but it’s not the best. You can’t deny that mine was waaaaayyyyyyy better. Besides, it came from a pretty girl so it’s automatically better than Eddie’s.”
Steve’s cheeks blushed slightly as he looked over at Robin. “How was work?”
Robin’s eyes shifted between the two of you on the couch, but then settled on Steve. “How much did she have?”
“Don’t wanna know Birdy!” Your voice sang out across the room.
Steve shrugged. “Work?”
She huffed and hung up her coat, admitting defeat on getting information out of a crossed-you. Robin kicked off her shoes and grabbed one of the bottles off of the counter–the one that was still half full–and joined the two of you on the couch. Robin managed to fit herself perfectly between you and Steve, causing you to frown slightly, but say nothing.
“I almost punched an old lady but nothing new.” Robin took a long swing from the bottle of wine.
“Was it that cunt Mrs. Defejeki?”
“Woah, language.”
“What are you five?” You rolled your eyes at Steve’s comment and picked up the remainder of the joint out of the ashtray, trading the weed for the rest of the bottle of wine. You and Robin shared basically everything. There were always a few exceptions, but still. If you started a bowl, Robin would finish it. If Robin did a shot, you did a shot. And while you were both built differently, the mix of shit the two of you ingested managed to get the both of you to about the same place.
Robin just relit the joint in her mouth, nodding at you. “You’d think she’d go somewhere else to buy eggs if she always has something fucking stupid to say about our eggs. Ma’am, no offense, but you’re in a fucking city. If you want fresh eggs, get a friend with a coop on a roof or some weird shit.” She took a long drag, eyes rolling back and her eyelids closing.
You nodded. “Or just…leave the fucking city.”
This caused both you and Robin to burst into a fit of giggles, causing the latter to cough a little bit since she was still inhaling.
You felt Steve’s eyes on you the whole time, but it only made you warm and fuzzy inside…or maybe that the combination of shit you put in your body. But either way, his eyes were gorgeous. You couldn’t help looking back at him, trying to locate every single color that reflected off of his eyes in the dim lighting. It didn’t help that his eyes were redder than yours, but he was still just as stunning to you.
Robin leaned in front of you, blocking your view of the gorgeous specimen across from you on the couch, and placed the filter back in the ashtray. “Now what kiddos.” She placed a hand on your thigh and looked over at you, a smile on her face.
“Did you wanna go out? Because I’m a little decapitated at the moment.”
This caused Steve and Robin to burst at the seams. You furrowed your eyebrows as Steve and Robin kept laughing at you. Everytime they managed to calm down a bit, they would look at one another and burst out laughing again.
“What!” You grumbled, shoving your foot against Robin’s thigh, trying to get her to pay attention to you again. “Whattttttt.”
“It’s—” She giggled. “Not decapitated–HA–Incapt—” She couldn’t speak, she giggled so much. “Fucxk Steve.” She heaved out. “How the fuck do you say it?”
Steve, who was not much better than Robin at the moment, was wiping literal tears from his eyes.
“Incoorperat—fuck—wait.” He giggled again, and you were sure a flame just washed over your body, leaving you with goosebumps. “In—Cah—Pass–ih–tay–ted.”
He slowly sounded out the word like he was in the middle of an eighth grade spelling bee.
You slapped Robin's arm. “I literally said that!!”
Robin and Steve burst into another fit of laughter.
The group of you continued to giggle, and talk over one another. All of you filled to the brim with smiles and laughter and stories to tell.
At some point you had changed into your pajamas, most likely when Robin had decided to call her night and go to bed. You, on the other hand, had changed into your pajamas, and gone back out into the kitchen to clean up the mess you had made during the night’s festivities. Steve, who was still awake, offered to help you, like the gentlemen you were learning he was.
The two of you cleaned the kitchen, talking about your childhoods, comparing the worlds you grew up in–their likeness, their differences.
And somehow 11 pm turned into Midnight. And then Midnight became 2 am. And then 2 am had become 6 in the morning.
You had spent the entire night, sitting on your couch, talking to Steve Harrington.
Since it was early enough in the morning, you invited Steve to come and sit on the fire escape with you, and watch the sunrise.
It really sucked visually when there was no sun to watch rise since the sky was overcast and gray, but that didn’t stop you from enjoying Steve’s company.
The two of you sat in silence with one another. You and Robin had always joked about how much you hated domesticity, the thought of just existing with someone else for the rest of your life was definitely a thought that scared you. Especially doing things as simple as laundry or the dishes, eating your meals together, or sitting on the fire escape and watching the sunrise together. But this moment, with Steve, made your heart ache. You never wanted this moment to end. It was a new drug you didn’t know you needed. And now that you had it, how were you supposed to give it up?
“I really appreciated last night–tonight—the past several hours.”
You looked away from the street, and over at Steve. “I-...I really enjoyed it too.”
He smiled softly at you, and you have no idea what came over you, maybe it was bravery. But you reached over and brushed some of the hair in his face, behind his ear. It was intimate, maybe too intimate for people who were supposed to be friends by proxy of Robin Buckley and nothing else.
You could feel Steve’s breath hitch and for a singular moment you regretted everything. You regretted staring at him in the bar. You regretted getting coffee with him. You regretted telling him about your thesis. You regretted sitting next to him during your movie night. You regretted the movie night. You regretted staying up and talking to him for hours on end, wasting away the night until he knew almost every single thing about you. You regretted suggesting coffee on your fire escape when you realized it was six in the morning. You regretted brushing his hair out of the way.
But most importantly, you regretted not putting your coffee cup down when you did because the hot liquid spilled all over your lap when you quickly retracted your hand and stood up.
“Shit–Fuck. Sorry.” You watched as the liquid covered your bare legs and as the mug clattered across the fire escape, and off the edge, shattering on the ground below.
“Shit–are you okay?”
You were shaking your head. The coffee was fucking hot, that was for sure. And that was at least your excuse for the tears that sprang to your eyes. Especially since you really liked that mug too. Steve put his mug down and crawled through your window. “Where are your towels??”
Your hands covered your face as you vaguely mumbled something adjacent to ‘the closet’. Steve had no idea which closet you meant, so he grabbed the dish rag hanging off of the stovetop and made his way back across the living room and through the window.
“Are you okay?” He handed you the towel and you wiped off the burning hot liquid. Luckily, you barely had enough coffee to kill you, so your legs were just a bit red from the quick extreme change in temperature.
Robin, who had heard the commotion ran out of her room in a tired stupor and looked around, panicking. “Is everything okay?”
Steve looked back into the apartment at Robin. “She–uh, she spilled her coffee and the mug went over the railing and she’s not burnt or anything but—yeah.”
Robin furrowed her brows and made her way over to the window. “Sweetheart, why are you up this early? It’s not even seven am.”
You shook your head, and that’s when the thunder started. You aggressively sighed and made your way back through the window into the apartment, following Steve who had done just that moments prior.
“I'm going to go take a shower.” You quickly made your way to your room before Steve or Robin could say anything.
You grabbed your lotion and a hair towel from your closet, alongside your robe, and headed into the bathroom. Once you closed and locked the door, you looked down at your legs. The red was starting to fade away, thank God, and there was no sign of bubbling so at least your embarrassing blunder wasn’t going to give you physical injury—only emotional.
Steve and Robin’s hushed whispers carried down the hall but you had no idea what the two of them were talking about, only that it was probably about you. You decided to ignore it and splash some water on your face.
God, how fucking embarrassing was that? You weren’t one to get flustered by men, or women, or really anyone, but this? What the fuck was that? Spilling hot coffee all over your lap?
And Steve had sprung right into action, could he be any more perfect? My god you were fucked.
It was at that moment that you realized you left your phone on the kitchen counter. It’s not that you couldn’t shower without music, but you preferred not to. So now you have to contemplate the dilemma of going out and facing your best friend and her best friend who were definitely talking about you, while you were only in a robe, or do you just suffer in silence.
When you heard the front door slam shut, you had your answer. Assuming that both of them had decided to go out to breakfast and give you some space, you shoved your clothes into the hamper in the closet in the bathroom and opened the door.
And there was Steve, with his hand up, as if he was about to knock. “Hey—sorry.”
“Oh–” You took a step back, and only looked at his face for a moment, a little too embarrassed to really make eye contact with him.
“Sorry, it’s just—I–uh, Robin went to get us some breakfast from this place…She wanted me to let you know, and you had been in there a while without the water running so I–uh–wanted to make sure everything was okay.”
You looked up at him and almost swooned at the sincerity in his eyes. Could this man be any more perfect? Did he want to talk to you? You had only been in the bathroom for like, five minutes without turning on the water?
“I’m fine Steve, thank you for asking. I wanted to…um…apologize for earlier when I–”
Steve shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize, seriously–”
“No I so do, I literally made a move on my best friend’s best friend, and almost completely unwarranted too–”
You were cut off by the feeling of Steve’s lips on yours.
It was like heaven was on earth, and every single one of those thoughts came back to your mind. Steve’s lips—having coffee in the mornings with him. His eyes—getting dressed up and going out to lunch and running errands with him. His smile—making dinner with him and doing the dishes afterward. His hair—the sight of his head between your legs—
He pulled away the second he realized you weren’t kissing back and started to follow down the same path of panic you had just been on. “Shit—I read that so wrong–fuck, I didn’t—”
You pulled yourself out of whatever stupor you were in, grabbed Steve Harrington by the back of his neck and shoved his face into yours��lips crashing against the others. His hand flew around your waist and pulled you up against his body.
He tasted like mint chapstick, something you weren’t sure you were expecting, but it just added to how attractive he was.
Steve slowly walked you backwards, until the back of your thighs hit the counter. Steve all but picked you up while you hopped backward onto the counter. He was once again your knight in shining armor when he held you in place, saving you from toppling over into the sink. You laughed against his lips, causing him to smile and pull away for a moment. “You’re clumsy aren’t you.”
You watched as his chest rose and fell, just as quickly as yours. You pulled him into another first kiss, wanting to feel his lips again. “You have no idea.” You mumbled, wrapping your legs around his waist.
Steve moved his lips away, starting to kiss up your jaw, preening at every little gasp and inhale and sound you made. He squeezed your hips and moved your waist slightly, giving you the hint you needed to start grinding on him. His teeth grazed your ear and you let out a moan, rolling your body up against his.
Steve let out a breath against your neck making your skin break out into goosebumps. Your right hand was clutching the kitchen countertop, while your left hand had made its way up his chest and on the back of his neck. Your fingers wove into his hair, yanking on it slightly as he continued to kiss lightly down your neck.
Something you never thought would happen today was hearing Steve Harrington moan. It was one of the hottest sounds you had ever heard in your life, causing you to pull on his hair again just so you could hear it again.
“Sweetheart, you’re killing me here.” He groaned against your neck and pulled you directly against him.
“So do something about it.” You sighed out gripping the counter tightly.
You felt him smirk against your skin and pull away from you, much to your dismay, which you made known by your groan. "Steve please."
"Say it again Princess."
Your eyes met his as you bit your lips. "Please."
A wave of something came over your entire body at the look Steve gave you when spoke.
"Anything you want, pretty girl."
Something else you had never thought would happen today was the sight of Steve Harrington kneeling before you on your bathroom floor between your legs.
You had basically prepped for this moment since you were completely naked under the robe you were wearing, but the thought of a shower was now far from your mind. Steve kissed your thigh, causing you to suck in a breath, and grip the countertop impossibly harder.
He slowly kissed up your thigh, moving your legs so that they were over his shoulders.
You moaned out his name, causing him to falter for only a moment. He groaned against your skin and squeezed your thigh with his hand. “Fuck me gorgeous.”
You licked your lips, unable to lift your head from the way it was resting on the mirror.
"Sweetheart, eyes on me."
You moaned and inhaled, looking down at the man between your legs. His eyes were already on yours, as he slid both of his hands up, pulling you directly against his mouth.
The feeling of his lips against your cunt made you let out the most strangled sound, trying your best to contain anything above a whisper.
You could have cummed at the way he was looking at you, but just rocked your hips against his mouth, hoping for a bit more of the feeling of him.
“Come on pretty girl.” He licked up your cunt, causing your body to involuntarily jolt a little bit. “I know you can make prettier sounds than that. I wanna hear them. I want the neighbors to know who’s fucking you like this–”
There was a knock on the front door, slightly frantic, but not panicked.
“Hey, guys? I accidentally locked the door, can you come get it for me?”
You let out a little gasp, your breath stuttering as you teetered on the edge of the counter and on an orgasm. Steve pulled away and kissed your thigh quickly. You leaned your head back against the mirror and just gripped the counter, coming to terms with the fact that your best friend just cock blocked you, and that Steve was no longer between your legs, eating you out like a starved man.
“Hey, pretty girl.” He cooed, standing up and kissing you quickly. “I know I know.”
You whined when he pulled away, the taste of you on his lips was not one that either of you would forget for at least the rest of the day, probably your lives.
“I’m gonna turn on the shower and then go let her in—.”
Your phone pinged with a text from Robin as Steve turned the shower on for you. You squeezed your legs together, trying to get any sort of release from the pent-up orgasm just sitting in your gut.
“You wouldn’t do anything without me, pretty girl, would you.”
“I could hurt you, Steve Harrington.” You muttered but nodded to his statement.
He smirked slightly but then closed the door behind him and you heard him make his way to the door, to let Robin into the apartment.
It wasn’t even 8 am and you hadn’t slept and the day was getting longer by the minute.
_____________________________________________________________________
After that morning, you had somehow managed to miss Steve at every turn, causing your frustration to build throughout the day, especially since he was leaving the next night.
And then, because of your classes, you managed to not see Steve at all for the rest of the trip, except for the few minutes where the two of you crossed paths, with Robin.
The last time you were face to face with Steve Harrington alone for more than a few seconds was when he was tongue-fucking you on your bathroom counter. And it was pissing you off.
But one day, a few days after Steve had flown home, your phone pinged. And when you saw that one Steve Harrington had started following you on instagram, you followed him back embarrassingly fast.
The only thing that was more embarrassing then that was how quickly he dmed you after.
And suddenly you were attached to your phone: Constantly checking it to see if he texted you, smiling at your screen whenever his photo popped up, giggling at his cheesy jokes out loud. Your demeanor had completely changed. Instead of the consistent snark and attitude, you had a more pleasant and approachable demeanor. You would wake up early in the mornings and make breakfast for Robin before she was even out of bed. At the clubs, you would dance and drink with people, but never danced with them for more than one song, and didn’t take anyone home either. Sometimes you would even opt to sit there on your phone, texting Steve.
But after three weeks of being on the outside of whoever was making you feel this way, Robin had enough. She was going to find out who this mystery person was, and how the hell they managed to make you act like this.
“Who the fuck have you been texting?”
You looked up from your phone, immediately clicking it off. “What are you talking about?”
Robin scoffed and rolled her eyes. “You’ve been on your phone nonstop for the past two weeks, smiling at it like some sort of lovestruck idiot, so who is it? Who are you smitten for?”
“Pshh–I’m not—I think you’re losing it, or something.”
“Is it a girl?”
You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms.
“So what’s his name then huh?”
You looked away from her, staying silent.
“You can’t pretend like you haven’t been smiling at your phone, or that you haven’t been drifting off into space…You’re literally doing it right now?”
You blinked the images of Steve out of your mind and shook your head.
“You’re delusional—” Just as you looked over at Robin, she was on top of you, having launched herself across the room in an attempt to get your phone from your hands. Unfortunately, Robin launched herself at you with such force that the two of you toppled over and she managed to grab your phone, snatching it from your hands.
Right before she could slither out of your grasp, you grabbed her ankle and yanked her back towards your body. “Robin give me my PHONE.”
This was an unfortunate situation for many reasons. The first was that Robin escaped your grasp and ran into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. The second was that your phone unlocked with her face so it was relatively easy for her to snoop. The third reason happened so painfully slowly. You heard her laughter die off and silence take over. She had discovered who you had been texting.
And you just stood across from the bathroom door, leaning against the wall and bouncing your leg, eyes wide, heart beating loudly, as you could feel Robin looking through everything you had been saying to Steve.
She had been your best friend for years so she knew how you texted when you flirted, and to make matters worse, she knew how her other best friend texted when he was flirting too.
Suddenly the door opened quickly and Robin handed you your phone back.
“Birdy—”
She shook her head. “I’m going to go for a walk.” Her voice shook a little bit and all you could do was stand there, knowing better than to try and prod her. “I’m not—I just need to think and then we can talk about it.” She muttered.
You watched as Robin grabbed her coat, her purse, and her airpods before you watched the door slam shut.
The next thirty-seven minutes were filled with silence and a lot of panic cleaning. Suddenly your bed had new sheets in it, you had taken out the trash, the dishes had been done, you swept the kitchen—and even lit that midnight citrus candle Robin loved so much.
Ever since becoming friends, you and Robin simply didn’t fight. The two of you got along so well that it felt like you were made for each other sometimes. But right now? Now was not one of those times. Instead, you paced around in literal circles because the guilt of non stop texting Steve was eating you alive.
But it’s not like you did anything wrong either. The two of you had only been texting and nothing more. Sure it was almost every second you possibly could and he did take up all available space in your head, especially since the two of you never got around to round two of your bathroom scene—let alone finishing the first session.
You were not dating Steve Harrington. You swore to yourself you wouldn’t do anything else without Robin’s knowledge and consent of the issue in the first place.
You looked up when the door closed, making eye contact with your girl. In her hand, she had a brown paper bag and a drink carrier carrying her favorite drink in it, alongside yours. You smiled at her, hesitantly because she really could have thrown the drink in your face and you would have accepted it. But instead, Robin gestured towards the balcony and you nodded, grabbing some napkins and opening the window so she could step out onto the fire escape.
Once you both were through, you each sat in your respective spots, delegating the drinks and the pastries she had picked up on her way home from whatever path she had taken herself on. The two of you did this in complete silence. At first, it was nerve-wracking, but the peaceful knowledge of the fact that you both could move in sync with one another felt good.
You both sat and watched the people pass by, taking sips of your drinks, and taking small bites out of each of the pastries. You weren’t going to speak first—that much was obvious.
After a moment, Robin sighed and looked at you. “You like him a lot.”
Not a question, just a fact.
You nodded. “Yeah…”
“Hmm.” Robin’s mouth twisted, but not into anything malicious. She looked down at her hands. “I wish you told me you liked him sooner, because he clearly—uh, he clearly likes you back.”
Your cheeks tinged with pink, and your hands rubbed at your cheeks, trying to hide the fact that there was a blush on your face.
“I wasn’t going to do anything about it unless I talked to you first Birdy—”
“I know.”
“And neither was he—”
“I know.”
“And honestly Robin, I really do like him, and I was pretty sure he liked me back. I mean we spent an entire night out here talking and talking—I’ve never talked to anyone this much in my entire life. And he thinks I’m funny and actually answers my texts and I—I just….”
“I know.”
You looked over at her. Your mind swimming with thoughts of Steve and Robin. It was bringing you to the verge of tears since no matter how big a crush on someone was, you would never let it come between you and Robin’s friendship.
Robin took your hand in hers and shook her head. “It’s okay. I promise.”
“Really?”
“Yeah–I mean. I had to think about it and at first, I was really mad, like pissed, because I thought you two had been seeing each other behind my back—which obviously I know you weren’t—and then I realized how fucking smitten you’ve been since he was here. I mean your attention was basically in Indiana.” The two giggled a little bit, a tear breaking free from your eye as Robin continued. “But you weren’t. You were still my best friend and you didn’t even do anything because you cared about me? And I’m not exactly thrilled that Dingus has won your heart over me, but I also wouldn’t not recommend him, if that makes any sense.”
You nodded. “Birdy I–”
She squeezed your hand. “Really. It’s okay. I’m honestly just mad about the fact that he’s answering your texts. He’s the fucking worst at texting everyone else so it must mean he really likes you. I’m extremely jealous…”
You laughed again, just enjoying Robin’s goodness.
“Besides, I feel like it gives me the upper hand for a question I’ve been wanting to ask. Wanna go to Cowland with me in a few weeks? The kids have been dying to meet you and they’re graduating from high school and I was going to go back anyways but since I know you probably want to see Steve again–”
“Robin. I’ve been bugging you to take me to Cowland for literal years. I’d be so down to go, not just because Harrington is there.”
The two of you shared a hug, arms wrapped lovingly around the other, squeezing almost all the air out of each other’s lungs.
_____________________________________________________________________
Finally, the semester had ended, and it was time for Robin to go home and visit her kids. You and Robin had both walked across the stage, receiving your diplomas in your respective fields, both of you with Magna Cum Laude cords around your necks, plus a few others. Steve couldn’t make it up to the city that weekend, which was a little upsetting to Robin at first, but all was understood.
The two of you had signed a lease for another two years, deciding that you both wanted to stay in New York City, and you both wanted to live with each other. This was really exciting for both of you, but was causing a serious amount of guilt for your best friend.
"Robin, it's not bad news. I know I'm biased, but it's incredible news that you have a job, and you have a place to live. and Yes—-don't cut me off—Yes, it's sad because it's officially going to be your permanent home, but that's, like, that's what growing up is."
"When the fuck did you get so...so....wise?"
You shrugged and looked over at her with a smile.
Since Robin didn't have a license, the two of you patiently waited at the airport for Steve to arrive. He had no idea you were suddenly in the great state of Indiana. You had never been before, and Robin had told you not to get your hopes up—but part of you was excited to see where your best friend grew up, where she was before this chapter of your lives.
You hadn't told Steve that you were in state, at the request of Robin, since she had some sort of plan in her mind. You knew that the first step was gauging Steve's reaction to seeing you at the airport with her, which made no sense to you, but you kept your mouth shut since this was her home turf.
A maroon BMW pulled up in front of the two of you, and you could say you were surprised by Steve's car of choice, but you would be lying. It's not that he read as a rich person, but Robin had one time told you his parents were loaded and you had laughed her off. Seeing how nice this car was, you wish you could take it back.
Steve pulled up to the two of you and rolled the window down. "Do you actually need help with the luggage or can you—" The second he saw you, he lost track of his sentence. Eyes roaming over your face, your body. Why did it feel good to be looked at like that?
"You're here."
You gave him a nervous smile. "That is true, yes."
The corner of Steve's mouth tugged up into a smile, and the two of you continued to look at one another, enjoying the fact that you were finally in each other's company again for the first time in over a month.
Robin snapped a finger in front of your face. "Good grief you two, let's get moving. I'm not standing out here in the sun all day because we stunned Steve into silence with your presence—-and to be fair, if you surprised me, I would be shocked into silence too by how excited I would be— pop the trunk Steven— to see you, but this is not the time. I want to get on the road as quickly as possible."
Steve snapped out of the trance between you both and popped the trunk of the car. He quickly got out of the car and moved around it to grab the luggage from you, and Robin, to put into the trunk.
"You suck ass, Harrington. You'll get out of the car for her, but was gonna make me put my bags in the back myself."
Steve rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips, almost like an exasperated mother. "Robs, seriously. You know I would have gotten out to help you."
"I'm sure you would have Steve. I'm sure."
"You're not even in Hawkins and you're being a pain in my ass."
The two of them continued to squabble, making their way into the front of the car while you slid into the back. It was the sort of friendly banter that you could get used to.
And you did because, after about ten minutes into the drive, you had completely zoned out and watched as the roads turned into fields. You had never seen such flat land before, it was... bizarre. The world felt like it was supposed to have things reaching towards the sky—trees, skyscrapers, mountains—but not here. It was tall grass and nothingness. But it wasn't a bad feeling, just different—something almost serene about the vastness of it all.
Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing to be grounded, but you couldn't speak to that since you had literally run away to the city to live in the sky and aim for the stars.
Your introspection about the human condition of reaching for the stars was interrupted by Robin.
"Right Y/n?"
"Mhm."
"Were you even listening?" Steve huffed.
"To be so honest, I have no fucking idea what you said birdy. Not one clue."
Robin groaned and turned around in her seat to look at you. "How long have you been tuned out; I don't know how much of this I can restate."
"Basically since we left the city."
Robin groaned again: way louder, and with a lot more dramatics. "I'm not explaining this again. You agreed with me regardless, so it's the truth."
Steve looked at you through the rearview mirror and smiled at you. It was one of those smiles that could make a girl trip over her own feet, and it was directed at you, making your insides melt. Steve had clearly been out in the sun since he was a little tanner than you last remember, and he had a small swatch of freckles across his nose and cheeks. It was adorable.
"Oh! Oh! We're almost there!" Robin exclaimed, and you broke your eyes away from Steve's to look at the old sign she was pointing to.
Hawkins - 5 Miles
"Five minutes til you enter a literal hellscape."
Robin swatted Steve's arm and smiled back at you. "It's not that bad I swear. Like sure, it's a bit of a Cowland, that much is true, but—-"
"You don't have to justify Cowland to me Birdy. The only thing you have to justify is the fact that we have been on the road for almost an hour and I have yet to see a single cow. Now that's just ridiculous."
Robin smiled at you and turned back around, facing the front again. She reached over and snatched Steve's phone (something you realized was a habit with everyone) and opened his Spotify, scrolling until she found the right song. She cranked the volume up and rolled the windows down, screaming along the words to Everybody Wants to Rule the World. How fitting.
You rolled your window down and enjoyed the feeling of the wind on your face. While you had never been to Indiana before, or most of the middle of the country, something you definitely loved was how fresh the air was. No buildings or mass amounts of cars were polluting the air—just the grass and trees.
Steve looked in the rearview mirror at you again, and you looked up, feeling his gaze on you. You could see the glimmer in his eyes as he looked at you. The pure joy that you were here. And you knew it was going to be a good two weeks here in Hawkins.
That was until it rained for three days straight, and you and Robin were basically stuck inside her room with nowhere to go. Robin's parents were kind enough to lend you their cars when they got home from work since Robin didn't drive and you didn't have a car, but that meant that if either of you wanted to go anywhere during the day, you had to bike or walk and neither of which, in the rain, was really ideal. You could always wait for Steve to get off of work, but by then you'd have Robin's parent's car so you were stuck.
But on the fourth day, you woke up to the smell of petrichor and a shining sun peering through the curtains. This was perfect because of you and Robin's strict itinerary.
Friday Day: Exploring the town/Lovers Lake
Friday Evening: Graduation
Friday Night: Grad Party
When Robin told you that you were spending your day at Lover's Lake, you thought she was actually going to murder you since there were no real places named that, but when the two of you were picked up by Steve to head to the lake, you found out it was, in fact, a real place.
It was actually kind of pretty, considering it was surrounded by woods. You were calmed by the sense of height within the area from the trees, but the actual visage of the lake was beautiful, and the sun reflecting off of that made it feel a bit more magical.
You were decked out in that same hoodie from the other day, as well as your favorite pair of shorts, both of which were covering up your favorite bathing suit. Swimming was enjoyable, but you weren't sure if today was a swimming type of day or a lounging in the sun type of day.
Either way, it was a 'try-not-to-stare-at-Steve-Harrington' day.
Your chauffeur started to help two other guys around his age, set up a picnic blanket, secure an umbrella into the sand, and set up the speaker for the music.
Nancy, the girl you had yet to be properly introduced to, got out of the car she drove here in with one of the boys, and walked over to you, a bright smile on her face.
"Hi! I'm Nancy, it's so nice to finally meet you. Robin hasn't shut up about you since you first met at college."
Your face lit up and you tried to cover up the smirk on your face. "Since we first met? Damn Birdy, I had no idea..."
"Thanks, Nance, now she's not going to shut up about it for fucking weeks," Robin mumbled, slinking off to go grab more things from Steve's car.
"It's really nice to meet you, Nancy. I've heard a lot about you too." You smiled and shook her hand—it felt a little serious for a meeting, but you got the sense that was just how Nancy was.
"Did Robin add your songs to the playlist? It gets really varied at times, but it's the only way we figured out to let each person be happy with the music if we all put fifteen songs on there, and then hit shuffle."
You shook your head, really confused about what this girl was saying to you. Nancy handed you her phone and scrolled through the playlist, showing you everyone's music picks, and explaining it in further detail. When you finally understood, you paused. "So can I add anything? No questions asked?"
Nancy nodded, smirking at the slight twinkle in your eyes. You added yourself to the playlist and handed her back her phone. "I'll add them before we start the playlist so that way they're in there fair and square."
Nancy nodded and then looked over at the boys. "So! You've met Robin, and obviously Steve, has Robin introduced you to anyone else yet?"
You shook your head 'No' and Nancy took your hand and dragged you off into the sand towards the gaggle of boys all staring at the umbrella since it was not as sturdy as they thought it would be.
After a single gust of wind, it had knocked right over.
"Nance there's no need to man-handle y/n—-"
Nancy rolled her eyes and stopped short of the group. "Go get some rocks Steve, and pile it around the base, I'm pretty sure we went over this last summer..."
"Yeah, and I'm pretty sure it ended up not working in the long run there Wheeler." The long-haired guy crossed his arms with a raised eyebrow.
"Do they always give you this much lip even when they're wrong?" You half-whispered to Nancy, causing the two of you to try and cover your laughs.
"Y/n! You're supposed to be on my side here." Steve threw his hands up in the air before they landed on his hips.
"You look like a mom." You blurted out, causing yourself and the rest of the young adults to laugh together. Except for Steve, who was fake fuming, but really just at a loss. He really didn't think he looked like a mother but if a girl he had hung out with for no more than three days thinks so, then he might as well be fucked.
"Where did Robin find you?"
You looked across the group to the guy with longer hair, a tight tee with some sort of skull on it, and black bathing suit shorts. He was attractive, that was sure enough, but he definitely wasn't the pretty boy Harrington wanted to take a bite out of. Your voice dripped with sarcasm. "Take a wild guess."
"Touché. So. More importantly, what are you adding to the playlist."
You shrugged. "You'll find out. I'm guessing you're Eddie."
"In the flesh." He did one of those bows that was reminiscent of a movie from your childhood—it was really fucking nerdy.
"And so you must be Jonathan." Your tone shifted, slightly nicer, less of a bite to it. It stumped Steve, watching you clearly figure out and adapt yourself to the person you were talking to, but never being one to actually hurt the other person, just tease lightly.
Jonathan nodded, his arm was already around Nancy's shoulder, and he gave you a small 'Hey".
Robin shouted over at the group for help with all three of the coolers, and you watched Jonathan and Nancy go over to help her with them. You helped Eddie and Steve set the umbrella again (this time properly), and moved on to setting up your towel and bag.
Steve placed his towel on the other side of yours and sat down on the ground next to you. Eddie had moved on to setting up his area around the picnic table, reorganizing coolers, and setting up the various snacks for the group throughout the day.
"So..."
You turned and looked over at Steve, who was looking right at you, a brightness in his eyes that the sun couldn't match. It looked right, like it was supposed to always be there.
"So..." You responded, smiling back at him.
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"
You sighed and leaned back on your hands, looking out over the water. "Robin thought that it would be a good...test of character, I think is how she put it. She, uh, got a hold of my phone a few weeks ago, and made the connection about why I had been so..."
Steve bit his lip. "So...?"
You rolled your eyes. "I'm not gonna tell you if you're going to be a jerk about it."
Steve held his hands up, "I swear I won't be."
"Fine." You huffed and looked down at your legs. "Why I was so...attached to my phone, and blushing all the time, and why I kept smiling when I would get a text....and yeah."
You saw as Steve's face flashed with a wave of emotions, all of which managed to stay just below the surface. One of these days you would have to just stare at his face all day so you could learn very little mannerism, every little quick about this man.
"You, uh, smile every time I text you?"
You pursed your lips but then nodded. "Yeah. I—uh, I do."
"Hm." Steve nodded and looked out over the lake.
"Yeah."
You looked over at Steve just as he looked at you, causing both of you to smile again. Just as Steve was about to say something, you heard Robin call across the beach.
"Babe!"
You huffed slightly, the smile on your face becoming a little fake before turning and looking over at your best friend. "Yeah, babe?"
"Add your fucking music so I can hit shuffle."
"Aye Aye Captain." You gave her a mock salute and pulled out your phone, turning back towards Steve.
"Am I seriously going to get judged for what I put on?"
"We actually have a no complaints rule, since a certain someone would always bitch when his music never came on."
Your face lit up with amusement and nodded, before looking down at the playlist and scrolling through the songs already on there to see what had been added already.
"You really like the seventies and eighties, huh Harrington."
He shrugged and smiled. "I think I could have easily been an eighties heartthrob."
You rolled your eyes and shoved his arm slightly. "Yeah okay, sure."
Steve feigned a gasp. "You don't think I could've been!"
This caused you to laugh but continued to sort through your music, choosing the fifteen songs you felt like you wanted to hear most today.
"I'm sure you could have Steve. I'm sure."
Steve clutched his heart and fell backward. "You're killin' me here princess!"
You hit his thigh, not hard, but just enough to get your point across. "Don't call me that, unless you're going to commit to finishing the job because you owe me...big time." Your eyebrows were raised expectantly, but your voice was low so only Steve could hear you.
Steve smirked, and his eyes went a little dark for a moment before the sun returned them to their caramel color. "Trust me, now that you're here..."
"Good." You smiled and laid back on your towel, enjoying the feeling of the sun on your face and thighs, and enjoying the company of the smirking man next to you.
And you both stayed like this for the next hour, only getting up when food was offered. Steve eventually left your side, deciding to go for a swim. You opted out but enjoyed the view.
“He’s something else…”
You turned and looked at Robin sitting next to you, nodding in agreement.
“He really likes you.”
Your eyebrows knit in confusion. “You’ve been talking about me behind my back?” Teasing her.
Robin shook her head and smiled. “I don’t have to. I mean, I've known him for years, but he’s never been like this about any girl, not even Nance.”
“Steve and Nancy dated?”
“They were the couple in high school. Did not end well, but the two of them are still good friends, surprisingly.”
You mouthed a soft ‘oh’.
“But…I’m being dead serious Y/n, he’s never been so…chill, peaceful…I don't know—”
“Sure.” Nancy chimed in and sat down on the opposite side of you.
“What?”
“He’s just so…sure about you. Like yeah, he can be a cocky asswipe, but he’s always freaking out about whether or not something is right, or going the way he thinks it’s supposed to.”
Robin nodded along while you tried to breathe evenly again. Not that you didn’t get those feelings from Steve, you absolutely did, but hearing about it from both Nancy and Robin at the same time was a bit overwhelming.
“He just, He’s so calm.”
“We’re not even dating.” You sighed, crossing your arms and looking out at the man in the water. He caught you looking at him, and winked at you, sending you a smile along with it. You waved slightly at him, returning the smile.
“He hasn’t asked you yet?”
“Nancy, it’s the twenty-first century, girls can ask guys out too.”
You rolled your eyes at Robin and shook your head. “No, not yet. We’ve only actually spent about fifteen hours in each other’s presence, with one of those being the hour drive down from Indianapolis…”
“Holy shit, and he’s that….wow.” Nancy leaned back on her hands, looking out over the water.
Plus we didn’t want to start dating behind Robin’s backs and have her hate us forever and ever. But you kept that thought to yourself.
The man in question decided that he had enough of the staring from the group of girls sitting on the beach, and waded his way over to you three, before walking out of the lake. “Can I help you three?”
Steve was literally dripping hotness off of his body. The sun backlit him, creating this holy look about him, and the water droplets slowly made their way down his chest and abs and down towards—You snapped your eyes back up to his face, where he was watching every single movement of your eyes, smirking slightly. It was fairly pornographic and would have you dragging Steve over to the car and fucking him senseless, but you’d settle for eye-fucking him instead since Robin was directly next to you, and so was Nancy.
“Just questioning Robin’s girl here.”
Steve’s eyes stayed trained on you and he raised his eyebrows. “Hmm, then why were all of you staring out at me huh?”
“Well, Harrington if you must know...”
“–I must Robin.”
“I’m just learning things. That’s all.” You tilted your head slightly, almost teasing him slightly. Your gaze was already enough to make anyone blush, but Steve Harrington wasn’t anybody. However, he immediately lost the shine of confidence at the thought of you, Robin, and Nancy talking about him.
“Learning what…exactly?”
You, alongside the other two girls, just shrugged, causing Steve to eye all three of you up and down, and head over to where Eddie was cooking up some lunch for you.
Sighing, you fully laid all the way down again and closed your eyes. “I think I’m just going to lie in the sun for a while and internalize every little thing the two of you just said to me.”
You didn’t hear as the two girls got up and left you alone. You also didn’t hear as someone else took his place next to you. You just drifted off into a light sleep, enjoying the warmth the sun was providing you so that you could just breathe for a moment and figure out everything that was going on inside your head.
First off, you liked Steve. And Steve liked you back. This was obvious before the girls told you, but the confirmation was a plus.
Second, Steve hadn’t mentioned ever going on another date, ever. You hadn’t even gone on a first one if you remembered correctly.
Third, You were unsure if Steve Harrington wanted to actually date you, or even kiss you. Sure, you rode his face like you were in one of those bull games in the rodeo bar, and he clearly seemed to enjoy it. But the only time he actually mentioned getting physical with you was either while it was happening, or if you brought it up first. Was he actually interested in you, or just being a gentleman?
This shit was fucking hard, that’s for sure.
“Hey.”
You hummed, letting Steve know you heard him.
“They’re going on a walk through the woods, wanna join?”
You shook your head, not wanting to get up from your spot on the towel.
Steve was silent for the next few moments. You assumed that he was staying on the beach with you since the others grabbed a couple things and started walking off into the woods.
“You’re not going?”
“Nope.”
You opened one eye and looked over at the boy next to you. He was looking right at you–a small smile flashed across his face. He was nervous. “I-I hope that’s okay.”
“Yeah…Steve, it is.”
“Good.” He hummed and smiled at you.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Hawkins decided on having a Friday Night Graduation, and while at first, you were hesitant, you realized you’d rather have a graduation at sunset than have to wake up at the crack of dawn to watch kids you didn’t know walk across a stage.
You had gotten slightly dressed up, wearing a summery dress that didn’t leave you overheating, but was one step above casual. Sitting in between Steve and Robin was definitely something to behold considering they wouldn’t stop whispering to you, pointing out their kids.
The Salutatorian was one of theirs—a Will Byers, Jonathan’s brother, as you found out. His speech was beautiful and even made you tear up a bit, which meant nothing since the group you were sitting with was all crying alongside you.
Eventually, the graduates walked, and you watched your friends stand up and down, screaming and cheering for their kids each time one of them walked across the stage. You had learned all of them using a Quizlet, trying to make sure you didn’t mess up any names. So far, you had learned that Dustin Henderson was Steve’s favorite, with Max Mayfield being a close second. (from what you had heard, Max could easily be your favorite). Max was dating Lucas Sinclair, who was on the basketball team, which you found out Steve had been coaching for the past few years. Then, there was Will Byers, Jonathan’s brother, and Mike Wheeler, Nancy’s brother. Mike was dating Elle Hopper, who was best friends with Max. But Elle’s Dad was getting married to Will’s Mom…
You repeated this little thing over and over in your head, trying to wrap your brain around what could have possibly connected all of these older teens to Robin since she and Steve didn’t even talk until high school, and Steve only dated Nancy in junior year and—Honestly, it was weird, considering you really couldn’t imagine twenty-three-year-olds hanging out with eighteen-year-olds, but you lost all your doubt when you saw how connected this group was—whatever had happened between them, bonded them for life.
Eventually, the caps got tossed, the principal said a few words, and they were all dismissed. The small group of you waited off to the side, knowing that they were going to all talk to their parents first. Steve stood next to you, and placed a hand on your waist, leaning down to whisper something in your ear. “Tired yet?”
You laughed softly and shook your head, keeping your head straight ahead because if you turned, you were going to kiss him right on his stupid lips.
“No, but I am ready to start drinking again.”
This caused Steve to laugh slightly and straighten up, but his hand stayed on the small of your back until a gaggle of kids in green and white grad robes came running at you all.
You took a step back watching as hugs and congratulations were thrown out at all of them. It was heartwarming, truly, to see such a family in action. You swore you saw, out of the corner of your eye, Steve and Dustin having a lightsaber battle at one point.
Robin took your hand and dragged you over to the curly-headed one. “Y/n, this is Dustin, Dustin, Y/n. The Roommate.”
All hell broke loose when Robin announced your title. The children’s heads all snapped towards you and they started to crowd you, which wouldn’t have been as intimidating if you had met them all before, or if they were shorter than you, which a bunch of them were not.
“You’re her Roommate?” “We’ve heard so much about you.” “Oh my god, we finally got to meet you?” “You’re a lot prettier in person.” “Where did you get that dress, it’s stunning.” “You came to watch us walk across a stage? That’s definitely a choice…” “I wouldn’t go to Indiana if I lived in a cool place like the city ” “It’s literally so nice to finally meet you.” “You’re like really pretty.” “How did you meet Robin?”
“Alright Alright! Let the woman breathe my god.” Steve yelled out to the group, as he took notice of your wide eyes. It’s not that you were nervous about meeting them, it’s just that the wave of questions was a tad bit overwhelming and unexpected.
“Alright.” Steve sighed and looked at you. “Ready?”
You furrowed your brows. “For?”
“Well.” Steve started to point to each child as if he was giving you a speedrun introduction. “That’s Dustin, That’s Max and Lucas. Will, Mike, And that’s Elle. Am I missing anyone?”
The group managed to give Steve a full unison moment of attitude.
“You still look like such a mom Harrington.” You laughed a bit when he put his hands back on his hips.
“God I knew I’d like you,” Max spoke up, causing you to smile at her.
“It’s really nice to meet all of you!”
They all responded back, at the same time, and then scattered. Whatever initial excitement was there had finally dispersed, meaning you weren’t the center of attention, and you could breathe again. Well, except for one kid, that came up to you.
“It’s nice to finally meet you. Robin doesn’t shut up about you when she’s home.”
“Good things I hope?”
Dustin nodded, and suspiciously eyed how close you and Steve were standing. “All good things. But I’m surprised at the fact that you came to Indiana.”
You shrugged. “Robin asked, so I came. Pretty easy decision. Best friends and all that.”
“So, are you going to be at Steve’s later?”
“What’s with the interrogation Henderson.” Steve raised his eyebrows.
“I’m just asking her questions! She’s new! I can’t just..let her into the group—”
Steve scoffed, “As if you are the final decision maker in that?”
“Uh, yeah. I am.”
“Sorry Dipshit. The older half really like her, so she’s in.”
“The rest of us have to vet her and you know it. Sure, Robin wouldn’t be friends with her if she sucked, but the rest of us don’t know her—”
Dustin eyed you up and down again. “I’ll allow it, but I still need further proof.”
“Don’t be a dick, Dustin.” Max cut in. “She’s pretty, she clearly can put up with Steve’s shit since she’s willing to stand next to him this long. Why can’t there be another girl in the group?”
Dustin’s mouth floundered for a moment before he settled on his answer. “It’s not that I don’t like her. I just….”
“Dustin.” You smiled at him. “I’m not asking to infiltrate. I get it. This is clearly a tightly bonded family, and I’m not trying to just waltz in here and take a spot. But let me give you my qualifications and you can mull it over, yeah?”
This amused Steve. Somehow, you had managed to entertain Dustin, and still manage to deescalate whatever the kid was thinking about. Dustin agreed to your terms and waited to hear what you had to say.
“First off, unlike Robin, I have a license. I don’t own a car but I live in like the major city of major cities, so I don’t exactly need one. But I can drive. Second. I am not a current permanent addition to the group, at least presence-wise. I am like a fun aunt who will let you stay in the city with her when you want to get out of Hawkins, and I only show up at family functions to spice it up a bit. Third, I have traveled to several different countries in the past two years, which means I can and will bring you back goodies from other countries. Fourth, I know how to party correctly, which means I am at a good time, and I will provide references if you need them. Fifth, and finally. I am over twenty-one, which means, I can and will buy you things that you can’t buy yet. This includes weed from a major city where it is in fact better than the stuff you get here.”
Dustin was taking all of this in, slightly bewildered by the fact that you literally just listed out your qualifications.
“Oh. And a sixth one, thrown in for free, I can commit to a bit Henderson.” You winked at him before walking over to where Robin had been talking to Will about something.
You felt Steve’s eyes on you but didn’t turn around, instead basking in the glory of dropping your over qualifications to win Dustin Henderson’s approval. You integrated yourself into her conversation with Will, enjoying the setting sun in the background. Tonight was going to be a good one, especially since you had decided that tonight was the night you wanted to talk to Steve about whatever was going on between the two of you, especially after everything that happened this morning.
______________________________________________________________________________
The kids managed to convince Steve to let them throw a graduation party at his apartment. Now this usually wouldn’t be such a big deal, but considering that they all could drink and party now, the space almost felt a bit too small. Especially since they invited some of their other friends that you had not yet met. Which is how you ended up sitting on the arm of the couch, watching all of the kids interact with each other.
“Hey.”
You looked over and smiled once you realized who it was. “Hey.”
“Wanna, uh–go into the kitchen with me for a second?”
You nodded and got up, following him past the decently sized group of people, and into the kitchen. It was not a spacious kitchen by any means, but there was a noticeably smaller amount of people, so it felt a million times better. You could breathe.
Luckily for you, you had been drinking since before noon, and it was well on its way to being one am. The true sign of a lady is how well she day drinks. You were on the balance of buzzed and tipsy, toeing the line with perfect grace. This gave you the confidence to feel a bit better about the fact that you were someone who was extremely touchy, which Steve clearly didn’t mind. Your hand had made its way to his chest, and you were gently tracing shapes.
“What’s up, Steve.”
“I–uh.”
You watched as his eyes flitted up to where the rest of the group was in his living room. He was silent for a few moments, which gave you time to really look over his face, and enjoy just how gorgeous he was. The curve of his lips. The slightly blush he always carried on his cheeks. The hazelnut color of his eyes. All while you were patiently waiting for him to sort through the words in his head.
“I’m really glad you came to Hawkins.”
“Me too.” You smiled up at him, batting your eyelashes once or twice for a bit of flirtatious emphasis.
“Because I had a really really good time in the city with you.”
You nodded, prompting him to continue talking.
This caused Steve’s smile to grow, with what you were sure were tints of blush across his cheeks.
“And I—well, I don’t exactly know what to do beyond this because you live in the city and I live here. And Robin might actually kill me if I ask you out, or if she found out the other things we started to get up to.” Steve was talking as quietly as he could, not keen on Robin finding out the compromising positions you had been in when Steve was in New York. “I know she has probably already said something to you but…I don't know. How do you feel about it because–”
For the first time in over a month, you were able to actually kiss him, instead of just dreaming about his lips, his mint chapstick, the way his hands felt around your waist. You had placed your beverage down on the counter and cupped his cheeks with your hands, basically pulling his lips to yours.
That warmth from before came crawling up your spine and filled your body with light. Fuck, you wanted to feel this for as long as you possibly could. Enjoying Steve.
But eventually, your proverbial luck would run out, since Robin cleared her throat from the doorway. She wasn’t exactly staring at either of you, but you couldn’t see her face since you covered your mouth with one of your hands, and wrapped the other arm around your stomach, looking away from her, losing all contact with Steve. Steve had quickly pulled one of his hands away, the other one still on your waist. You weren’t sure if Robin could see that one since your body was blocking it. Steve’s thumb ran up and down your hip, trying to calm you down.
He could feel your heartbeat racing. How embarrassing was that?
Even the calming sensation of Steve’s thumb rubbing up and down on your hip simply could not bring your heart rate down to a nice even 120/80. You’re pretty sure your Apple watch just pinged you about an increased heart rate.
The only worse thing was that Robin had just walked in on you kissing her best friend.
Her two supposed best friends kissed each other.
“I–uh–I was going to ask you where Y/n went…but um, I can see you’re both a bit busy…” The sound of your name made you wince.
Robin’s voice was strained, and she was trying to keep whatever emotions she was feeling at bay. Technically she had said this was fine, but she had never had to witness it or deal with it, in person before.
“Robin–”
“No, guys, seriously stop.” Robin took a breath. You could tell this was a bit weird for her, but she managed a brave face for the moment. “We talked about it. I’m okay with it. It’s just…It’s going to take me a second to get used to actually seeing it. Honestly, I just—I really wasn’t expecting to find you guys making out in the kitchen
“Are you sure?” You finally turned your head and looked at her, more nervous about how she would react to this than anything else in your life.
Robin smiled at you and nodded. “Really, actually, I’m fine. I am. I just, I’m going to go, um…I’ll be out back with Eddie if you need me.” She quickly left the room, leaving you and Steve alone again, to let out the breath both of you were holding.
“I thought that was going to head in a way worse direction if I’m being so honest with you.” You muttered, squeezing Steve’s arm.
“You’re telling me. I almost fucking melted when she first came in.”
This caused you to let out a brief laugh.
Steve sighed and rubbed his thumb up and down on your hip again. “I think she needs time getting used to it. We all do.”
After another moment of staring at one another, the feeling of contentment made your heart swell, shoving some bravery forward and out your mouth.
“I like you a lot, Steve.”
He smiled. “M-Me too.”
“Oh, so you agree? You like you a lot? That’s just what a girl wants to hear, damn.”
Steve’s eyes widened and he shook his head. “No no, I meant I Like you a lot, not that I like me a lot—actually—”
“Steve.” You cut him off, smiling at him. “I was teasing. You’re cute when you’re flustered.”
Steve couldn’t fight the smile growing on his face harder if he tried. You watched it slowly reach across his eyes and he shook his head. “I mean it though–a lot. I don’t think that even covers it.”
You placed your hand on his arm and squeezed it. “Don’t flatter me too much or my ego will inflate like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters—”
“WHO JUST SAID GHOSTBUSTERS.”
Dustin popped into the kitchen, looking around for the culprit. His eyes landed on you two and his eyebrows raised. “Robin’s friend Steve? Really? That’s the girl you’ve been–”
“Dustin. Enough.” Steve tensed up, cutting off the younger kid.
“No no no.” You moved out of Steve’s arms and towards Dustin. “Please, Dustin. Tell me more, the girl Steve, what exactly.”
“Dustin I swear to god—”
You looked over your shoulder at Steve and winked at him, before placing a hand on Dustin’s arm in a very similar way to how you had just touched Steve’s arm. Now, you weren’t a manipulative person by any means. But men were easy to get information out of if you just knew how.
You felt Steve’s eyes burning into you, watching your every move.
“Dustin, do you have a girlfriend?”
He looked at you weirdly but nodded. “Yeah. What does Suzie have to do with this?”
“How do you feel about her?”
Dustin’s shoulders detensed, and he tilted his head slightly. “Why do you want to know?”
“Just tell me about her.”
Dustin, who basically never talked about Suzie anymore since he didn’t want to annoy the group, lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. “Well! She’s the perfect woman. Smart, kind, snarky, bossy, gorgeous—hotter than anyone ever—sorry. But she means the world to me—.”
You nodded along, listening to everything he had to say about Suzie, even popping in with clarifying questions, or asking how they met.
“Wow, that’s a long time to be dating someone so young.”
Dustin nodded and shrugged. “When you know you know.”
Steve was just watching you, completely fascinated. There were things Dustin was telling you that he had never even heard before. But he knew you were up to something, he just couldn’t figure out what you were doing.
You nodded and cast a quick glance back to Steve, who met your eyes. “That’s true.”
Steve almost blushed at the way you looked at him when you said that, making your eyes soften for a moment. When you know you know.
“Why did you want to know about Suzie?”
“I saw you texting her earlier. I’m sorry she couldn’t be here for your graduation…”
Dustin shrugged. “She’s coming up next week for about a month so I’d rather have her for a whole month than just a weekend. Besides, we’re both going to the same college so…I’d rather focus on what we do have than not, you know.”
“You are very wise for a high school graduate Dustin.”
Dustin shrugged. “Well, I’ve been saying that for years but now I have the degree to back it up….Alright, I don’t know what you’re up to, but I’ve accepted your application into the group here.”
“Oh thank you, I was a bit worried there.”
Dustin rolled his eyes. “Please, you passed the second I heard the word Ghostbusters come outta your mouth.”
This made you smile. “Dustin, one last question, and then I’ll let you go back to your friends—”
“Actually, I’d much rather be in here since you seem a lot cooler than half of the people in there.”
“I appreciate that Dustin thank you. But, my question is. Does Steve look at his phone like that? The way you were describing Suzie…”
Dustin scoffed. “Are you kidding? I’ve never seen him so glued to a screen before–”
“Dustin...”
You shushed Steve. “Let the man continue Harington, God.”
Dustin preened up a little bit at the sound of being called a man, making him continue. “He’s like…I’ve actually never seen him like this before. He’s always checking his phone but he’s smiling at it and laughing at things…oh…You’re good.”
You squeezed his arm before letting go. “Dustin, I need you to know that I am actually very interested in your relationship with this girl and I do hope I get to hear more about Suzie, I really do. I also appreciated the information you just gave me.”
“You’re the phone huh.”
“You’re a Genius Henderson.” Steve glared at him, definitely trying to conceal the embarrassment he was feeling.
“So Dustin, tell me more about the way he’s been acting.”
“Henderson if you don’t leave the kitchen right now–”
Dustin took a step away from you. “I like you, a lot, y/n. But I think I’ve done enough damage for Stevie over there, so I’ll leave you alone.”
You nodded and gave him a little wave as he took off back into the living room. You turned around on the spot, facing Harrington, who was all but embarrassed at Dustin exposing him.
“You smile at your phone when I text you huh?”
“Oh shut up, you knew that already.”
“It’s nice to get confirmation.” Your hands clasped behind your back, and Steve took the opportunity to walk over to you and place a hand under your chin.
Your breath? Left the fucking building, maybe even the whole state of Indiana.
“Confirmation that I liked you?”
He was lifting your chin up with just one knuckle, just enough that your head tilted up to look at him.
“I feel like what we did in the bathroom was confirmation enough.” He whispered, his lips ghosting over yours. “And if not, then kissing you a few minutes ago should’ve been.”
You hummed, eyes closing, expecting his lips over yours.
“You just like to tease me, huh.”
“Steve.” You whined softly, leaning forward a bit, trying to capture his lips in yours. But he just shifted back slightly, not letting your lips do anything more than ghost over yours.
“I like to tease too, ya know.” He muttered, his other hand sliding back onto your waist, pulling your body against his.
You hummed, waiting for him to make his move, giving up the little control you had moments before since the prize was a kiss.
But no kiss came. Steve Harrington dropped his hands from your waist and chin, and stepped back, grabbing his beer off of the counter and winking at you. “If it’s a game you want sweetheart, I can play it too.”
You groaned and watched as he backed out of the room, leaving you once again up against a counter and completely wound up.
A few hours later, you had found yourself rolling a joint for the older group, basically giving Eddie a masterclass in the art. He was extremely doubtful about the fact that your weed would be better than his, but when he took his first hit, Eddie Munson coughed.
The small group of you—Jonathan, Robin, Eddie, and Steve—all stared at him with wide eyes. You gently took the joint from his hand took a hit from it, and offered it to your right to Steve, who took a smaller hit than you. Since he had smoked with you before, he didn’t cough, much to Eddie’s dismay.
Jonathan gratefully took it next, muttering something about Cali Weed, which you didn’t fully catch. Eddie turned to you, eyes extremely red. “Jesus Christ Y/n. What the fuck is that?”
You exhaled slowly, impressing everyone, but Robin, with the amount of smoke in your lungs. “I say this with so much love in my heart Eddie—It’s good weed.”
Eddie went to scoff but started coughing again, causing you to smile a bit. You felt the first hit in your face, always. No matter how many times, your face was always the first. It felt slightly buzzy, like a current was pulsing through your cheeks, your chin, your forehead. You leaned against Steve, watching as the joint made its rounds.
“Nancy, not a big smoker?”
Jonathan shook his head, exhaling the smoke over his shoulder to not blow it all in your face. “Can hold her liquor better than any of us though.”
“I buy it.” You smiled, resting your head against Steve’s shoulder.
Robin stuck her tongue out at you from across the circle before taking the joint and taking her own hit.
“So Y/n.”
You hummed and darted your eyes towards Eddie.
“You told Henderson that you’ve been to many different countries, like where?”
“I don't think that would make sense even if I wasn’t slightly high and slightly intoxicated.” You laughed and shook your head. ”But, uh, I don’t know. I’ve been a lot of places. Do you want me to just start listing them until you find one you like? Like those little Rolodex things old ladies have?”
Eddie nodded, taking the joint from Robin and taking another hit, this time not coughing.
You sighed and yawned a little bit, taking the joint when it was offered to you. Instead of taking a puff, you passed it on.
“Alright so, uh, let's see. I’ve been to about twenty states, and that includes Alaska. I’ve been to Canada a bunch. I have been to the Caribbean, so a bunch of those bad boys. Where else…”
“Serbia.” Robin listed for you, causing you to nod against Steve’s shoulder.
“Serbia, Croatia, Montenegro, all three of which are gorgeous by the way. Which then takes me to Europe so uh those countries, plus obviously England, and Ireland, both Republic of and Northern. Then, let's see, France…”
“France was a good one for you.”
You nodded. “Paris was good for me in many ways.” You made suggestive eyebrows at Robin who then burst into laughter.
“Then tell us about it.”
For some reason, you were starting to feel as if Eddie wasn’t your biggest fan. Now normally, if a man didn’t like you, you couldn’t find even a singular fuck to give, but this was bugging you. Maybe because he was so close with Robin.
“Well.” your gaze hardened a bit as you looked at him. “I think I managed to spend a total of sixteen hours in the Louvre during my entire week in Paris. I spent another day seeing the rest of the Musees that I wanted to see, and then I did the rest of the touristy things the rest of the time.”
“What about the Nightlife?”
“What about it?”
“Tell us about it.”
“Eddie…” Steve warned, feeling you tense up as Eddie continued to poke and prod at you. His words weren’t sharp, they weren’t knives. But they felt like tiny little shoves across your chest.
“Steve, it’s fine.” You muttered.
“If you must know, France has good nightlife, but if you want to party, you go to Spain. If you want exclusive yet fun clubs, you go to Berlin. Anyone who’s traveled outside the continental US could tell you that.” Your jaw set, but the smile on your face was a bit devilish. “But Eddie, dear, what I get up to in foreign cities in terms of my sexuality is between me, my phone, Robin Buckley, and the whiteboard in our apartment.”
Steve gasped. “That’s what those tally marks are.”
Robin shook her head but then paused. “Well no, not...kinda I guess. But not exactly what you're thinking.”
“I slept on your couch. You dirty dirty women.” He grumbled, removing his hand from your thigh, except it was just to lean back a bit, not to move you away from him.
“We’re both extremely competitive when it comes down to the basics. Besides, Robin was the one who started it, she said that she used to tally how many swings and misses you would take at your old job.”
Steve hung his head and laughed, causing the rest of the group to laugh alongside him. “Did she tell you what that job even was?”
“Oh Scoops? Absolutely. We cut up that stupid fucking costume one year for her Halloween costume.”
“That was you!?!”
You nodded and took a sip out of the drink you had brought out. “I’m also a costume designer.” You hummed. “Multi-hyphenate.”
That joke was meant for Jonathan since it caused him to cough on the air in his lungs. “Resume building 101.”
You mock cheers’d to that and rested back against Steve’s side, his hand moving back to your thigh.
Eventually, it was just you, Robin, Eddie, and Steve left, sitting on the porch, enjoying the view of the stars. You had forgotten how stunning they could be since you had basically lived within the city for the past few years, not really going out to places where you could see the sky. It was just marvelous to you.
Robin and Eddie stood up to go, meaning you also had to go. But Robin just kissed your head and whispered in your ear before you could stand. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
You nodded, smiling at her and taking her hand in yours. “I love you, Robin Buckley. Marry me.”
This caused Robin to burst out in laughter, and she nodded at you. “It’s a date babe.” She said her goodbyes to Steve and left with Eddie who was your ride home.
The two of you sat together, with you listening as Steve told you about someone, the constellations that he knew, with you lying on his lap, while he pointed out the stars.
“And that one is Orion’s belt. It’s probably the easiest to spot since it’s literally just three stars in a row.” He whispered, not wanting to break the silence the two of you had created.
You hummed. “That’s the hunter right?”
Steve shrugged. “You probably know better than I do.”
You managed to sit up and face him, lips seconds away from him. “And what would make you say that?”
He shrugged again, no longer looking up at the stars in the sky, but rather at the stars in your eyes.
Your eyes flitted to his lips quickly, silently asking for permission, which he answered by placing them against yours. Your body exploded like the sun, radiating the peace you had felt all those months ago at the cafe, and then again in the kitchen. Neither of you moved, just sitting together like two lovers would, slowly kissing one another under the universe.
Steve took your bottom lip between his teeth and gently pulled away, enjoying the sound you let out as he did so. You tilted your head slightly, leaning forward to capture his lips again in yours, but he dodged your lips and kissed your neck instead. His lips found under your ear and kissed there. “Wanna head inside.” He muttered.
You hummed a positive response, unsure of how the two of you managed to make it inside and towards his bedroom. All you could focus on was the feeling on his lips, on yours, on your neck. His hands were everywhere, squeezing your hips, brushing up your thighs, tugging on your hair.
But you found yourself backed up against his bedroom door. His body pressed into yours, kissing your neck. “Fuck me, pretty girl.”
If that’s what he wanted you to do then who were you to deny him that much? Your head lulled to the side, giving him more access to your neck as you just moaned in response. Your legs were on the ground, but the only thing really keeping you up against the door was Steve’s knee, which had made its place between your thighs.
Steve’s lips quickly found that sweet spot right above your collarbone and he gently sucked on it, causing your hips to roll forwards and your eyes to roll backward. You inhaled and arched your back the more he sucked on it, nipping it to add some color to his mark.
Steve felt as your hand snaked its way around his waist, your fingers cool against his skin. You tugged on his shirt, making him pull away slightly and rip his shirt off of his body.
Both of your hands went to his chest, so you could run your fingers across it, feeling as much of him as you could.
“Steve?” You muttered as he continued to kiss across your neck.
He paused and looked up at you.
“If you don’t do something in the next minute I’m locking you out of your room and fucking myself.”
He chuckled, pupils dilating at the thought of you touching yourself. But he shook the thoughts away and pulled you in for a kiss. “As you wish, Pretty girl.”
You hummed at his words, removing your shirt when he tapped on your back and pulled away from you for a moment.
For some power beyond man, you wore a really cute bra today. It wasn’t lingerie, but it made Steve drool all the same, causing him to groan at the sight. He didn’t stop there though, slowly pulling off your shorts and underwear causing him to kneel down in front of you. You sucked in a breath.
The sight of Steve Harrington kneeling before you to eat you out was becoming your new favorite view.
He took one of your legs and placed it over his shoulder, kissing up your thigh, slowly, looking up at you the whole time.
He was looking for any kind of hesitation but instead, all he received was a “Fuck, Steve, please.”
Steve smirked at you before licking up your thigh and gently nipping at it, causing your head to tilt against his bedroom door.
Steve took his time eating you out. He teased you relentlessly, eliciting every single sound from you he could possibly discover, muttering how much of a “pretty girl” you were into your “pretty little pussy”.
His lips wrapped around your clit and he sucked over so gently. Your hips shifted forward, back on the edge of an orgasm, waiting not-so-patiently for him to make you cum all over his face.
“Come on baby girl let me taste you. I bet you taste so fucking sweet.”
“P-Please Steve.” Your eyes were squeezed shut, one had in his hair, the other shoved against the door frame for support.
The heat in your gut was winding up tighter and tighter, causing you to roll your hips, riding his face. Every time your body shuddered, you’d hit Steve’s nose just right against your clit, making you gasp a little bit.
You moaned his name out, finding yourself closer and closer to the edge as he became more and more relentless fucking you with his tongue and with his words.
He curled his tongue in the right spot, causing your body to snap.
Not a single sound left your mouth as you cum on his tongue, back arching against the door, leg shaking as Steve held you up as you came. You felt his tongue working you through, and you could have sworn he moaned at the first taste of you.
Eventually, Steve slowly pulled away, rubbing circles on your hips with his thumbs. Your high was slowly coming back down and you muttered out a ‘holy fuck’, which caused Steve to nip at your thigh. Still sensitive, you let out a moan in response before yanking on Steve’s hair gently.
He chuckled, the breath from his lips causing you to squirm a bit. What a sight you must have been: almost completely naked, covered in hickeys and marks, with a man wrapped in between your legs, up against his bedroom door.
Steve slowly let your leg down, before kissing his way back up, enjoying every little sharp intake of breath, and every little moan that got caught in your throat. He made his way to your lips and it was dirty how much you enjoyed kissing him while he still had you all over his lips. It was obscene.
“How ya doing pretty girl.” He muttered, arms wrapped around your waist, lips on yours.
You were blissed out. Every time you thought about what you just experienced, your hips twitched a little bit, and all you could do was use your hands to shove Steve’s lips further into yours. His tongue ran across your bottom lip, and you happily obliged, opening up a bit more so he could taste all of you.
When he pulled away so you could breathe, he went back to kissing your neck. “I’ve been dreaming about your taste for fucking months.”
You swore you could orgasm a second time at that sentence alone.
Steve’s fingers melted into your skin, and you were sure that there were permanent sun spots where his hand was, forever indicating where his hands should always be.
You gently pulled on his hair once again, gaining his attention. “Steve.” You muttered, rubbing your thumb up and down on his neck.
He nodded and reached over, opening the door to his room.
The two of you slowly made your way to his bed, lips on lips, hands grabbing for skin, wanting more contact than what you had.
By the time you were on the bed, your skin had become a canvas and Steve was the artist, his lips leaving little marks scattered across your skin like constellations.
Steve pulled away for a moment, sitting back on his heels, causing you to sit up. You took over his task, slowly unbuckling his belt, looking up at him the entire time. Steve licked his lips and bit his bottom one at the sight of you.
You slowly pulled it out of the belt loops and then threw it somewhere in the room. Your fingers made their way up his thighs before they popped open the button of his jeans. You could see the strain on the jeans from how hard Steve was, pushing against the fabric.
He groaned as you unzipped them before leaning back on your hands, watching him take them off. You could have sworn you started to drool when you saw his cock.
His hands almost started you as he placed one beside your head, leaning down to kiss you.
You didn’t realize that he had been wearing his silver chain this entire time, until it brushed against your collarbone when his lips connected with yours. You felt as Steve slid his knee between your legs, and his other hand cupped your cheek.
“Steve I–” You muttered against his lips, but he cut you off by kissing you again.
After a moment, he pulled away, hovering above you. “What gorgeous.”
“Please.” You whispered, feeling antsy at the fact that you hadn’t felt him yet, that he was barely touching you.
He smiled slightly. “You have somewhere to be?” He joked, kissing the corner of your mouth.
You rolled your eyes. “What if I did.”
He kissed your collarbone. “By all means.”
The top of your chest, above the bra. “Leave then.”
You let out a shuddered breath at the feeling of his mouth above your chest and closed your eyes.
“No?” He licked up your neck and nipped at the bottom of your ear. “Come on baby girl, nothing more to say.”
“F-fuck.”
He chuckled and slid his hand down to the front of your bra, undoing it with one hand. “Opens from the front…someone was prepping.”
Your cheeks turned red and you shook your head. “N-no.”
He shrugged and took it off of you. “Doesn’t seem that way, sweetheart.”
Your nipples hardened at the cool air surrounding you both, and Steve put his hand on your waist, slowly sliding up your side until he could cup your tit in his hand, giving it a squeeze.
You moaned at the contact but kept your eyes on the scene in front of you. It would be criminal to not watch Steve take his sweet time with you.
He shifted again, making it so he was able to rest on top of you, and trace designs across your chest with his tongue. It flicked against one of your nipples which made your body jump up against his.
“Sensitive?”
“Shut the fuck up.” You muttered, one of your hands making its way to his shoulder and squeezing it tightly.
He rubbed his thumb over the other nipple, flicking it. His tongue went to work, finding out everything that made you feel good, that made you moan. Once Steve had worked you up, he switched his attention to your other tit, his lips kissing across the valley of your chest.
He was teasing you, watching every single movement of your body and while you wanted to shove him back down to clean up his mess, you couldn’t help it. You had never seen a sight so intoxicatingly hot. His chain dragged around with him, adding to the sensation of his mouth on your skin.
Somehow from barely moving, you felt like your body was on fire, it was too hot. You felt too good.
“Gonna take my sweet time with you, pretty girl.” He muttered, kissing back up your collarbone. “Gonna hear every single one of those pretty sounds come out of that pretty mouth of yours. Yeah?”
All you could do was nod and close your eyes, trying not to orgasm right then and there.
He tsked and squeezed your waist. “I wanna hear it, baby. I want to hear you.”
“Yes–yes–please god yes.” Your answer poured out of you before you could even think about it. The only thing in your head was Steve Harrington. Steve’s hips, his ass, his arms, his chest, his lips, his hair, his chain, his stupid fucking smirk.
You felt him pull away for a moment, and you opened your eyes. He had gotten up and grabbed a condom, ripping it open with his teeth and tossing the wrapper somewhere. You watched as he slid it over his cock, which was already glistening with pre-cum, causing him to smirk.
“I make you excited or something, Harrington?”
He laughed as he made his way back over to the bed. “Something like that yeah.”
You leaned up slightly and captured his lips on your own, enjoying the moment of just his lips on yours.
He hummed and you felt him slowly guide himself to your entrance.
You’d never spent the whole night fucking someone, until now, and even then, you weren’t sure what you were doing was just fucking one another. Sure it started out like that, but it evolved into something more the second Steve Harrington took your hand in his and pushed into you for the first time, whispering everything he adored about you into your ear.
A sigh that could be categorized as relief left your mouth when he bottomed out, just letting the both of you get used to the feeling of one another.
He kissed your jaw before slowly pulling his hips back out.
You moaned into his ear as he started moving, your bodies moving in sync just like those cheesy books you had read told you.
Feeling good has never come so easy to you. The way Steve Harrington was kissing you, so tender, with sure care made you want to freeze the world so you could stay here forever, with him. Your moans match up to each thrust, each inhale from when he kisses the sensitive skin right above your collarbone.
The stars outside shined brighter for you, that’s what you would swear when telling your friends, that the universe quieted and the stars multiplied so you could see all of them as Steve made love to you, whispered how much he adored you, how he couldn’t wait to kiss you the moment he saw you at the airport. How he wanted to see what you tasted like the moment he first met you.
It was overwhelming, only breathing in Steve, bodies picking up the pace as you simultaneously leaned over the line, ready to snap.
You begged him, you needed him. His name falling from your lips with every single movement he made.
His hand slid down your body and slowly started toying with your clit. “Come on pretty, let me feel you. I want to feel you. You’ve been so good for me, so fucking hot baby, let me feel you.”
It snapped. The coil in your stomach snapped and you came, walls clenching down on him. Your mind went blank and your vision was filled with millions of stars that had floated in through the window and hung in Steve Harrington’s eyes.
The feeling of you caused him to quickly follow you, hips thrusting into you, making you both ride one another’s orgasms. The sound of his breath, his moans, caused another wave to crash down on you. Your back arched, jaw quivering as your chest lost all of its air. The weight of his body kept you grounded but your mind was in the clouds.
That calmness you had experienced before settled into your chest. It was unlike anything you had ever experienced before. There was no insatiable hunger, no need to go again (at the moment), nothing of the sort. Just a need to become inseparable, to become one whole again from two halves.
And you could tell Steve felt the same from the way he kissed your cheek and lifted his head to look at you. You both felt it. The feeling as if this was right as if you were supposed to be here with one another, as if it was written in the stars, or read through some tea leaves—you were supposed to be falling in love with Steve Harrington.
You leaned up ever so slightly, saying everything you possibly could with your lips against his, with no words being spoken. There was no need for them anyway because you just knew Steve felt the same.
______________________________________________________________________________
You spent the next week, doing your best to split your time between your best friend, and your something new. Robin was actually doing quite well adjusting to the two of you since it felt like this had always been normal.
The night before you and Robin were set to leave, Steve had taken you out by Lover’s Lake again, remembering how much you loved hearing about the stars. It was breathtaking. Truly the sky felt so vast and so big and you were standing underneath all of that with someone you truly cared about.
The night didn’t end there.
The two of you melted into one another in the backseat of Steve’s car. Skin on Skin. Stars collide in your eyes. Hands digging deeper than skin into souls.
Yet after all of that, you were still too terrified to ask the question that had been on your mind since last Friday.
What Now?
“I had been, uh, thinking.”
Steve’s thumb was rubbing against your hip, bringing your focus back to him.
“And, uh, we have to…”
You nodded.
“Steve I–”
Steve shook his head. “Let me get through this, yeah?” He whispered, almost like he was scared to even hear his own voice.
“I-I have been searching for a way out of Hawkins for a while now. I love my friends, but now that the kids have graduated and-and are moving away, I don’t even know what to do with myself.”
You brushed your hand against his cheek as a sign of comfort, not saying anything.
“I don’t want you to think I’m latching onto you because you could get me out of here. I need you to know that’s not—I have never felt more sure about anything—anyone in my entire life than I feel about you. It sounds fucking crazy to say out loud, but I swear your touch literally brings my heart rate down. Hearing your laugh is like a fucking drug and, and, I want to spend as long as I can staring into your eyes, memorizing every single centimeter of your body, watching you as you stare up at the stars. I w-want that. I want it so badly. It sounds delusional since we’ve barely spent a full week's worth of time together. But speaking it out into the universe has fucked me over so much in the past. Anytime I’d utter any true want out loud, it’d, uh, it’d disappear. But I can’t—I think I’d go batshit if I couldn’t kiss you every day. What–what I’m trying to say is that—”
You gently placed your lips on his lips, not having the words in the English language to describe the field of flowers blooming in your chest under the sunshine that was Steve Harrington.
Steve smiled and pulled away after a moment.
“You were gonna launch into the sky with the way your mouth was running.”
Steve nervously laughed and nodded, closing his eyes.
“I just don’t want you to think that I’m into you because you could be a way out of Hawkins. I need you to know that I’m seriously falling for you and I-I couldn’t be more in awe of you every time I look at you.”
Your eyes started to water and you shoved his chest. “Fuck Steve. That was…That was one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.” You muttered, burying your face in his neck, to hide the fact that this man just made you so emotional using minimal words.
The two of you sat there, enjoying the company of one another, whispering sweet everythings in each other’s ears. It was everything to you. His hands on your body, his eyes locked onto yours. The thought of having to leave the next morning had you terrified since neither of you really had any idea how you were going to make this work, but you’d be fucking damned if you weren’t going to try. Steve was worth it to you. He was worth everything.
And suddenly, because of Steve Harrington, you started to believe that you were worth everything too.
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cherry flavored | jjk (m)
pairing — jeon jungkook x reader summary — You bet with your boyfriend that he can't handle more than five minutes of your tongue, but Jungkook never turns away from a challenge. You'll make sure to keep him in his place. genre — smut, pwp, established relationship rate — 18+ word count — 1.6k warnings — explicit sexual content, oral sex (m receiving), deep throating.
The empty bottles of wine filled the center of the dining table, and the cheese platter was almost gone. Jungkook, with an arm around your shoulder, sat by your side at the dinner table, and your friend group filled the rest of the seats.
The laughter surrounded the apartment, and your friends filled you with joy.
“Can I help you clean up?” One friend asked you, and through her eyes, you could see she needed to talk.
“Sure thing,” you agreed. She asked your friend Alicia to join you in the kitchen before she started to talk.
“Guy, I need your help,” she said, nervous.
“Shoot,” you prompted.
“I’m dating this guy, and he’s got the biggest stamina ever!” she exclaimed. “I don’t know what to do. I need to get some sleep,” she finished whispering. You had to giggle at that.
“What is your dating life?” Alicia asked her, finishing the last of her wine. “The last guy didn’t know how to make you cum, and now this?”
“Everything in excess is bad for you, you know.”
“You need to control the situation,” you said. “Get him as hard as he can and only let him finish once you’re satisfied. That’s how I do it with Jungkook. Less than five minutes of blowjob and he’s done for. I usually do that when I want to speed things up.”
“Excuse me?” Jungkook appeared in the kitchen with some more plates for the dishwasher.
“Did you figure out what they are talking about?” Jeremy, your coworker, butted in the conversation, walking into the kitchen too.
“This one right here,” Jungkook said pointing to you, “just said that sometimes things need speeding up,” he said, frantic.
“What things?” Jeremy asked.
“In the boudoir,” Alicia clarified.
“Oh, my man!” Jeremy shouted, hugging Jungkook sideways. “Be my personal trainer, man. I need that stamina,” Jeremy slurred his words and the girls giggled.
“That’s rich coming from you, since you can’t take your hands off me,” Jungkook said. His face was full of emotion. Betrayal and cockiness were the most prominent.
“I can too,” you countered. Your friends just stood there, turning their heads from you to Jungkook and back.
“Alright, prove it. We’ll clock it. Whoever lasts longer wins.”
“You’re being such a virgo now,” Alicia commented.
“Okay, fine,” you agreed. And with that, you shook hands.
Even though your friends were fully entertained, they had to leave eventually. Jeremy wished Jungkook good luck, and he rolled his eyes. The dishes were clean, the wine stained tablecloth was in the washer, and you were done.
“High five for the cleaning crew,” Jungkook said, already offering both of his hands. You complied, and he used the opportunity to pull you to his chest and kiss your lips. “Shout out to us.”
“Shout out to us,” you agreed, pecking his lips.
“Want to go to the boudoir?” He asked, mocking Alicia’s tone. “I want to set a record from the jump.” You had to roll your eyes at that. “I promise I won’t gloat.”
“Let’s see how you perform,” you challenged.
You woke up after a blissful night, still riding the high of an orgasm before a good night’s sleep. 6 minutes and 12 seconds. You were ashamed. If you were to guess, you’d say at least 10 minutes. But he’s good. Really good. With a tongue of the gods.
Jungkook shifted in his bed, stretching loudly and with a sinful smile. He woke up feeling himself. He didn’t gloat with his words, but his expression alone had you fuming. You had to beat him. You’d have to pull out the big guns. To the drug store you went.
The day passed quickly, and in the late afternoon you came back from work ready to rock his world. You entered the bedroom and heard Jungkook turning off the shower. That was good, less clothes to take off. He stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his hips and one drying his hair. His hair… His wet hair… It had you drooling. But you had a job to do.
“Wow, look at those pecs,” You said, sitting in the bed. You had the most fantastic view of his body. The light of the sunshine hit the droplets of water that were traveling through his torso just right. Mouthwatering.
“Like what you see?” Jungkook said, wiggling his eyebrows and flexing his abs slightly. He walked closer to peck your lips. You used this moment to run your hand through his hair and hum in appreciation. Jungkook was really feeling himself now, smirking through the kiss.
Perfect time to enact your three step plan.
Step one, flatter his ego.
Step two, engage his competitiveness.
Step three, win
“You have somewhere to go?” you asked, holding his arm before he could go get dressed.
“Not tonight. Why? Feeling inspired?” he asked, jokingly stroking his abs, drying a few water droplets with the tip of his fingers.
“Actually, yes. I’m feeling pretty lucky to have left my end of the bet for tonight. You look so hot with water dripping on you like this,” you said, ogling his body and biting your lower lip. He gave you a breathy laugh.
“Say more words like that.”
“I’m ready to admit defeat. I just want to cherish you all night long,” you whispered. Wait for it…
“Wrong turn. I have the stop watch ready to go.” Bingo. “I am nothing if not a man of my word.”
“I guess that’s fine by me, too.”
“Where do you want to do the honors?” he asked, and you patted the bed, pulling him closer. He sat down, and you pushed his shoulders back, he fell down on the mattress and you straddled his lap with confidence.
“Bossy. I like it.”
“I can tell” you said, feeling his cock getting harder against your jeans. He was so easy. But getting him hard wasn’t difficult, getting him off on the other hand… But you had a good plan.
“Ready?” he asked and you pulled out flavored condoms out of your pocket.
“Yes, sir!”
“Condoms? I’m clean,” he joked, and you rolled your eyes.
“They’re part of the experience.”
“Condoms!?” he asked louder. “The things known to delay sensation of all mankind?”
“Not when I suck the flavors off them, they don’t.”
“Flavors?” he asked, and his eyebrows shot up.
“Get the watch going,” you smirked. He took a deep breath and pulled out the stopwatch.
“You’re on,” he said, pressing the top button.
You kissed his neck first, taking advantage of his position, and he closed his eyes. Maybe concentrating on not cumming, maybe enjoying the experience, maybe both. You grinded your crotch against his, and you noticed his breath get faster.
You trailed kisses down his torso, savoring the many water droplets. You got off the bed and removed the towel easily. You opened the first condom, putting it perfectly. You saw Jungkook’s eyes shot open, and you knew he was curious about your methods.
“Which one is that?” he asked, trying not to sound so interested.
“Mint.”
“Refreshing,” he commented. He physically prepared himself, balling his hands into fists and taking a deep breath.
You had this, though. You used all of the pressure of your cheeks, wrapping your lips around him completely and bobbed your head slowly. You caressed his inner thigh in the process. Not much composed, Jungkook groaned and hissed, and you could see he was doing his best not to cum.
The flavor was gone in about two minutes, and Jungkook sighed in relief when it was time to change it. He ran his palm through his face, taking another deep breath, but you still hadn’t pulled out all of the tricks up your sleeve.
“Time for cherry,” you sang. Your secret weapon. Jungkook loved all things cherry flavored. The fruit, pies, jam, chapstick… So when his head shot up, and his eyes were about to jump out of their sockets, you knew you made the right choice.
You didn’t give him time to fully process it, your mouth engulfed him again, as deep as it could go. You made sure to use your gag reflex to your advantage, closing your throat around his tip, and retrieving it with a loud pop. The saliva trail left behind left you moaning his name.
“Jungkook, I want to taste you, baby,” you said seductively, and he whimpered, closing his eyes shut.
And you continued with your technique, ruthless.
One more.
Two.
Three.
When your lips wrapped around him for a fourth time, he pressured against the back of your head to keep you there. Your throat closed around him once more, and with a final grunt, he released you.
He panted hard, and you quickly grabbed the stopwatch, pressing the top button to mark your time. 5 minutes, 53 seconds.
He did last five minutes after all, just not longer than you.
“You played dirty,” Jungkook accused, seeing your inappropriate smile.
“Dirty is my middle name.”
Your friends were once more gathered around your dinner table. Jungkook was refreshing people’s drinks while you served the desserts. Cherry pie.
“How’s things with what’s-his-name?” you asked your friend, not bothering to remember his name.
“I took your advice to edge him, and it worked like a charm. But it’s not going to work, he’s too needy now,” she answered.
“Go figure,” Alicia commented.
“Hey, how was the bet by the way?” Jeremy inquired.
“Mind your business, Jeremy” Jungkook said, and the table erupted in laughter.
“How long?” Jeremy pressed.
“I lasted 20 seconds longer,” you gloated.
“Score!” Jeremy high fived you, and Jungkook rolled his eyes.
“I thought you promised not to share.”
“I promised no such thing.”
#jungkook x reader#bts x reader#jungkook smut#bts smut#jeon jungkook#bangtanbathhouse#btsafterdarknet
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@oknutzy-week-2024 day four!!!
Write Me In
Part Two
Leo tried very hard not to be early. He really did. Then he ended up walking around Finn and Logan’s block about six times and sweating in the heat. He was stupid. He should have just worn a t-shirt. From what it sounded like, they were only just waking up. He didn’t need to be in this dark blue button down.
When it finally hit two o’clock, Leo let himself walk into the lobby. The doorman looked up and called him by his name, taking Leo by such surprise that he had to stutter through a yes, sir as if he was back home in New Orleans.
“Mr. O’Hara’s expecting you,” the man said. “You can go right up.”
The elevator was all mirrors and gold and Leo tried to make himself look slightly less sweaty and nervous than he felt as it rose—and rose. Penthouse. He should have known. He swept his blond hair back. At least in the AC he felt cooler—if not a little flushed looking. His shirt hid any sweat and he had his laptop and recorder this time. This would be a proper interview. He’d make sure of it. After all, this was his dream.
The doors dinged open. Leo had thought he’d have a few more moments. He’d get to walk down a hallway, knock on the door.
But no. One moment he was in the small elevator, and the next he was stepping directly into a massive, open living room. It was beautiful, too. The couch was a huge low-backed leather U. A coffee table that looked like it had once been a cross section of a massive tree was covered in notebooks and a laptop. A dining room table that could hold ten rested just on the other side of the room beneath a papery light that looked more like a sculpture. To its left sat an actual bar, complete with six stools, shelves of backlit bottles, and beer taps. The wall beyond was pure window and the afternoon light slanted in. Leo didn’t see a TV, but apartments like these usually had them concealed somehow. Maybe a projector screen waiting to drop down. Maybe there was a theater room. He knew a lot of artists had recording studios right at home. Who knew how big this place was.
It was also perfectly quiet. Leo didn’t hear a sound. He felt like he was an intruder as he hesitantly stepped out of the elevator and listened to it slide shut behind him. Maybe he should’ve taken his shoes off? The rug beneath the couch was pure white and plush, and the hardwood floors beyond that were honey-colored and gleaming. Four guitars sat along one wall. Beyond the huge dining table, there was a grand piano.
How many of Leo’s favorite songs had been written in this room?
“Kind of freaks me out sometimes.”
Leo jumped and turned at the voice, only to find Finn standing there in running shorts and a t-shirt that said The Strand Bookstore. He held a sleek gray ceramic mug.
“The windows, I mean,” Finn said with a smile. “I always worry about them cracking. Sometimes they rattle during storms.”
“That’s…unsettling,” Leo said.
“Yeah, Lo hates it.”
Finn looked, yes, a little sleep-rumpled. His red hair looked like it had been styled for a photoshoot to be messy though, not like it was actually slept on. Unfair, Leo thought. His hair was a wreck in the morning. He’d been right about not needing his button-down, though. He badly wished he was in a t-shirt and that he’d worn sneakers instead of these pinching dress shoes.
“What a beautiful place, though,” Leo said. “That’s quite a view.”
Finn’s eyes wandered behind him out the window. “Yeah, I like to see the city.” He held up his mug. “Well, Lo’s fucking grumpy when he wakes up, but coffee helps. Can I get you some? I was going to order some breakfast, too.”
“Oh. Sure.”
Finn smiled and jerked his head in a way that Leo guessed meant follow me.
The kitchen was no less impressive. There were huge marble counters, slightly iridescent. A complicated looking espresso machine. Massive silver appliances—fridge, wine fridge, dishwasher, three ovens. God, what Leo could do in this kitchen.
“Wow.” Leo turned in a slow circle. “Do you like to cook?”
Finn laughed. He’d gone over to the coffee pot—probably the simplest thing in here. “If I was ever home long enough to try, I might.”
All this, and no one was even home to use it.
“And Logan’s hopeless,” Finn said. “He can make tea.”
Leo laughed. “Right.”
“Do you take milk or sugar?”
“A little milk,” Leo said, and accepted the mug. “Thank you.”
Leo sipped the coffee. It was good. Strong and nutty. It calmed him a little to hold something warm. Finn had poured the perfect amount of milk in.
“He’ll be up in a second. Or I’ll go get him.” Finn looked a little bashful. “It takes us a while to—wind down after a show, we usually don’t get to sleep until around three or four.”
After a show. Leo could see them still, pressed up against the wall in Finn’s dressing room. What the hell did wind down mean in this sentence?
“No worries,” Leo said. “Where um. Where do you guys go next?”
Are you dating your drummer? Is your drummer dating you? Do you think of him as your drummer? Or Lo? Are you best friends like you make the world believe? Are you just fucking? Are you in love?
He took a sip of coffee.
“Boston,” Finn said. “We just came back from the West Coast. Then we have about a month off before we go to Paris. Then London, then Ireland—you get the idea.”
“It must be fantastic to see all those places.”
I had your poster on my wall. You got me through some of my toughest times in high school. I can’t believe I’m seeing your smile this close up.
“It is when we have days off,” Finn said. “But mostly it’s just a grind.”
“But if you had to choose a favorite city?”
“Rome,” Finn said instantly.
“You wrote your most recent album there,” Leo said.
“Yeah.” Finn smiled down at his mug. “Yeah.”
“Leo,” Finn he said suddenly before Leo could ask another question.
Leo straightened up. Finn O’Hara just said his name. “Yeah?”
“I know…” Finn smiled a little. “We both know what you saw in my dressing room last night.”
Leo had been wondering if this would come up. Or, how, really. Finn pushed his hair back and Leo watched the strands feather forward again. He had a flush to his cheeks.
“We do,” Leo said softly. “I’m so sorry about that. Your team—one second I was following someone and the next I was at your door—”
Finn nodded sharply and Leo stopped talking. He messed with his hair again. “It’s not your fault. I’m just—what I’m trying to ask—” Finn’s eyes went somewhere behind Leo and he smiled. “Finally. He lives.”
Leo turned towards a doorway he hadn’t noticed before—it must lead to the bedrooms—to find Logan shuffling into the room wearing nothing but a pair of white socks and tight, grey boxer shorts.
Leo choked on his next sip and hurried to put the mug down. God, how could Finn not be dating that? There on Logan’s hip was that tattoo. The fleur-de-lis. Right there, real, not a photograph. It was slightly lower than Leo had thought.
“Salut,” Logan said. His voice was hoarse. “Sorry. I’m not…” he looked at Finn and put on what Leo guessed was a try at Finn’s American accent. “a morning person.”
“That you aren’t,” Finn agreed. “Even if it’s nearly three in the afternoon.”
“Hi,” Leo cleared his throat. “I mean, good morning.” He looked at Finn and pointed to his mug. “Do I need a coaster?”
Finn looked back at him quietly for a moment. He had a tilt to his head and a slight smile on his face. “No.”
“Okay. It’s just that sometimes marble stains so I wanted to check. I read this article about different ways of protecting—I mean, not that I have marble counters. But I definitely would like some. They’re beautiful. This is a beautiful kitchen.”
What the hell was he talking about?
“I’m glad someone appreciates it. We certainly don’t,” Finn said. He took down another mug from a cupboard and Leo watched as he poured the coffee, lots of milk, and even more sugar into a mug before passing it to Logan, whose fingers had been drumming idly on the counter while he waited.
The lyrics to Lucky Me popped into Leo’s head.
Let me fill you up with sugar, let me drown in sweet and sweat.
He looked at Logan and found him already watching Leo over the rim of his cup.
“Well, I don’t want to take up too much of your time. So, maybe, um. Maybe once you’re ready we can—”
Logan cut him off. “Aren’t you supposed to follow us around twenty-four-seven for a week?”
Leo swallowed. Oh. “Oh. Yes. Yeah, no, I am. I just…I want this to be as comfortable for you as possible. I don’t want to feel like an intrusion. I’m here for whatever your normal life entails.”
“Right now…” Finn was scrolling on his phone. “That’s breakfast burritos.”
Leo quickly figured out that Logan made him nervous—more than Finn. His green eyes were intense, to say the least, where Finn’s were almost unbearably gentle. Leo had thought that was all for the cameras, a look designed to be photographed. But Finn seemed to look at everyone like that. Logan, definitely. The doorman who brought up their breakfast when it arrived. Even Leo.
Finn also responded to Logan’s movements like he was just an extension of his own body. It would be impressive if Leo didn’t think it was so sweet. He arranged the sauces Logan liked in front of him, took out the bacon from his burrito and put it on his own plate, all before Logan even had time to sit down. The smile Finn received from Logan in return felt private. Intimate, even. Logan’s entire face changed when he looked at Finn. It opened up. He looked younger.
It went right back to guarded when he looked at Leo.
“All right,” Finn said after he set down water bottles for the three of them. They were sitting at a little table in a nook off the kitchen that Leo hadn’t seen before. Finn and Logan were side by side, across from him. Leo had his burrito and coffee to one side of him, and his laptop and recorder set up on the other. Finn snapped a mocking finger gun towards him. “Shoot.”
Leo hesitated. It didn’t seem like Finn was going to finish what he had been about to say to Leo. Possibly ask Leo not to write about what he’d seen? He’d stopped hard when Logan had walked in. Leo was slowly getting the sense that what he’d seen was much more than a kiss.
Maybe that was what was behind all of the looks Logan was giving him. Fear.
“Well,” Leo said, brushing crumbs off his hands. He cleared his throat. “Okay—” They were both looking at him expectantly. Well, Finn looked expectant. Logan looked a little wary. Leo’s resolve dropped. “I just want you to know that I won’t write or publish anything that you don’t approve first.”
There. That seemed like the easiest way.
The two of them exchanged a glance.
“Isn’t that a given?” Logan said flatly.
“It is,” Leo said. “But I still want it to be said first.”
He made himself hold Logan’s gaze. His eyes looked vividly green in the kitchen light.
No, you don’t—say much—but I read—your touch. You fall—I sigh—Oh my—green eyes.
“Oh,” Leo said out loud.
“What?”
Just slowly realizing that it’s possible you two only write songs about each other?
“Nothing,” Leo said. “Why don’t we begin with how you two found yourselves in a band together?”
“People already know this,” Logan said.
Leo smiled. “Yes, people do know this, but I’m not going to use someone else’s quotes in my story.”
Finn stretched his arm out across the back of the breakfast nook’s bench, behind Logan’s back. Would that have been around his shoulders if Leo hadn’t been here?
“We met in high school, started the band there. Then we had a falling out but we both got into Harvard,” Finn said. “We were matched randomly as roommates.”
It was a smooth, well-practiced answer to the absolutely wild story that Leo had heard before. It left no room for further questions.
“Must have been a shock.” Leo wanted to ask what the fight in high school had been about, but he didn’t think the room was nearly warm enough for that yet. ���Or fate?”
“I like fate,” Finn said. Logan kept his eyes down. “I mean, look at us now.”
Leo kept the easier career and life questions going for the next couple hours, then they took a break. It was getting closer to five o’clock and Logan went to take a shower. Leo was preparing to go back out into the summer heat, just to give them some breathing room, when Finn picked up his guitar and began asking him questions.
“So, do you even like our music?”
Leo gasped. “Oh my God.”
Only at the surprised, maybe delighted, look on Finn’s face did he realized he’d completely dropped any professionalism right there. It was all Leo could do not to slap a hand over his mouth. Besides, Finn O’Hara was sitting in front of him, plucking some gorgeous little melody out on a guitar Leo happened to know he’d had since he was sixteen, and smiling—he could probably afford to let his guard down a little.
“I’ve loved your music since your first album,” Leo said. “And Rooftop is my favorite song in the world.”
“Rooftop,” Finn repeated softly. His fingers were still moving on the strings and Leo was trying not to stare. They were strong and quick. Subtly, the unfamiliar melody shifted into Rooftop.
“Oh,” Leo said, not bothering to pretend not to watch anymore. “I’ve never heard it on the guitar.”
“Why is that song your favorite?” Finn asked. He didn’t sound hurt exactly, but something like it. Brittle, maybe. “Just… Most people like the upbeat stuff more. At least that’s what I’m always being told.”
“Well…” Leo cleared his throat. “The way you talk about how sometimes it feels like you’re just barely holding on by your fingertips to something you want. That’s true for a lot of people I think. Waiting for someone who isn’t waiting for you back.” He thought of Logan’s eyes on him in Finn’s dressing room last night, Finn’s mouth on his neck. “Or maybe they are and just didn’t know it yet, I don’t know. But I listen to it all the time.”
Finn was leaning forward a little in his seat, listening.
Leo smiled and looked down. “I mean, I like the upbeat stuff, too. But yeah.”
“We’re around the same age, aren’t we?”
“I’m a few years younger than both of you.”
“Back then, I always thought it was just, like, twelve year old girls listening. Not that anything is wrong with twelve year old girls, but when you’re seventeen you don’t exactly want…” Finn winced. “Please don’t quote me on any of this.”
Leo laughed. “No, I understand. But also, no, it wasn’t just twelve year old girls. And it certainly isn’t now. At yesterday’s show—it’s incredible the range of people you captivate.”
Finn shrugged a little and switched back to the melody he was playing earlier.
“Can I ask what that is?” Leo nodded to the guitar.
“You can.” Finn huffed out a laugh. “But I’m not sure yet.”
“Ah. So, I’m watching the secret process right now.”
“You are. Gotta warn you, though, sometimes it’s like watching paint dry.”
“What’s the fastest time you’ve ever written a song in?”
Finn’s fingers fumbled, just for a moment. He looked out towards the windows, the city and sun. It was beginning to lower in the sky now.
“Oh,” he said softly. “About twenty minutes, I guess.”
Leo opened his mouth to ask what song it was, but stopped. Now Finn looked hurt. Sad. The guitar seemed to drink the feeling in. Leo heard him slip new minor chords into the notes, a tumbling, beautiful sound. Then he was suddenly playing Rooftop again.
“Would you like a cocktail?” Finn asked suddenly.
Leo looked over at the beautiful bar. “I think anyone would want a cocktail at that counter.”
Finn smiled. He settled the guitar on the couch and stood. “It’s gorgeous, isn’t it? I had it custom made for the space. Usually I wouldn’t give a shit, I’m never home, but I’ve always wanted to do it.” He went behind the bar. “Also. You can help with something. Lo and I are always at a bit of a impasse.” Finn put a hand to his own chest. “I like to taste the alcohol. Logan won’t touch anything that doesn’t taste like someone dumped a load of frosting into it.”
“So, he’s a sweet tooth.”
“Oh-ho yeah. Understatement. You know that edible cookie dough? Take a look in our fridge.”
I watch you fill your cup with sugar.
Finn read that thought clear as day. He bit his lip, elbows on the bar. “You’re putting us together a little bit, huh?”
“I won’t put anything together you don’t want me to.”
Finn glanced in the direction Logan had disappeared to.
“You’re under no obligation to explain it to me. I should have knocked loud and clear.”
“No, we…We’ve talked.” Finn fixed him with intent brown eyes. “We’ve talked. We love each other and…”
So they are in love, Leo thought triumphantly.
“It’s just that we don’t know what comes next.”
“I understand,” Leo said. “Really. Just…” Leo set his hands in front of him, trying to pour truth into his words. “I’m not here to, like, drag anything out of you. I’m here about your music, that’s my job, that’s what I love to write about. If what you two feel for each other is something that is not only important to that but that you’d like to tell me about, that’s wonderful. If not, that’s wonderful. And we also don’t have to decide now. Okay? Please don’t feel like you have to tip toe around me or my pen.”
Finn was looking at him with a slight smile on his face. He gave a small nod.
“And please tell Logan that, as well,” Leo said. Leo wasn’t sure he’d get those sentences out as smoothly under Logan’s gaze.
“Okay.” Finn swept his hand out towards the shelves behind him. “Gin? Whiskey? Tequila? Rum?”
“Rum,” Logan’s voice said from behind Leo. He appeared a moment later. His wet hair was combed back and out of his face, his skin flushed from the shower’s heat. He wore a dark green t-shirt, stretched across his strong chest and gray sweatpants. In his hand was a pair of drumsticks.
“Well, I wasn’t asking you,” Finn said. “Leo, please. I can make anything.”
Logan slid onto the stool beside him. “It’s true, he’s very good.”
“I’ll have whatever you’re having,” Leo said.
Finn gave his head a hard shake and hit his hands down on the bar. “Nope. I want to know what you want.”
Finn ended up fixing the two of them gin martinis. He gave Logan his rum and coke with, to Leo’s surprise, a kiss to Logan’s hand. Logan blushed, glanced at Leo, but didn’t pull away. He took his drink and his drumsticks over to a stool where a muted, practice kit was set up and began tapping out rhythms. This was not what Leo had been expecting when he took this job. He expected it to be wilder, like some of the pure and chaotic party scenes he’d been apart of when following musicians around before.
Night Swimming was soft. Domestic, even. Finn and Logan’s wildness on stage melted away into something tender. Finn brought out cheese and crackers and sliced apple and, as Leo sank into the massive comfy couch, he found that as the sun set, he wasn’t asking questions anymore. They were, the three of them, simply talking.
~
“So, so, so,” Cassie’s voice said in Leo’s AirPods. “How’s it going, you’re four shows in now you lucky duck.”
“That I am,” Leo said, looking around his Boston hotel room. Tonight was Finn and Logan’s third and final Boston show and Leo was basically in seventh heaven. Maybe they were all in hotel rooms now and he missed their cozy apartment a bit, but he couldn’t complain. He got to write about his favorite band and watch them perform every night?
And hear about their love. More and more. During their time after the show, at dinners, in dressing rooms, in Finn or Logan’s suites—and there was a suite for each of them even if it seemed like they only used one. During those times, they told Leo things. Little details about them, not as singer and drummer or best friends, but as a couple. Leo could feel the difference. He didn’t know why exactly he was being allowed to know these things when no one else did, but he let them give what they wanted to give.
“It’s good,” he told Cassie, but his mind filtered through what good was. Good was knowing how far Finn’s voice stretched as he warmed up in his dressing room. It was alone and strong. They were just scales and the occasional lyrics, but Leo could have listened all day. He also dropped to the ground and did rounds of push-ups which, while unexpected, wasn’t horrible to watch.
“I have to say though, I’m not entirely sure what happens next.”
“What do you mean?” Cassie asked.
Leo popped another salt and vinegar chip into his mouth. “Well, they’re going on vacation. Somewhere. They’ve got a month off before they’re back on tour, so I’m not sure why the magazine scheduled me for now. It’s not a full week before they leave.”
“Well, your week will be basically up. I’m sure you’re not expected to go on vacation with them.”
“No, no, I know that,” Leo said. Damn, he thought. “I’ll just—I have closing things I need. Want. Hope to ask.”
Cassie was quiet for a long minute. “Well. Better hop to it, I guess.”
~
“Will you hold this? Finn’s busy.”
Leo looked up from his notebook to see Logan holding out one end of what looked like an exercise band. He was dressed for the stage already. Black jeans, black tank top tonight. His hat had a Bruins logo on it—sometimes he did that. Matched his hat to the city. In New York, he’d been wearing Finn’s Rangers hat a lot and Finn had expressed his disgust at the switch many times. Leo had put it in the story.
“Sure.” Leo set his pen down. “What do you want me to do?”
“Just hold this steady.” Logan put one end of the band into Leo’s hand. “I like to warm up.”
Leo still didn’t quite know what that meant, but he did what he was told.
Turned out it meant getting a front row seat to the flex of Logan’s arms and wrists as he pulled the band in different directions and angles.
Suddenly, two hands appeared on his shoulders. “Hi. Would you like some tea?”
Leo held the band tighter while craning his head back to look behind him. Finn appeared to him, half upside down at this angle. “I—Yes. Sure, thank you.”
Finn smiled, squeezed once, then let go. “How’s the writing going?”
“Good.” That was half true. Sometimes, he was on. There were whole chunks that were solid and good. Then there were parts of Leo’s notebooks that were a mess of phrases which sounded far too mushy to be a proper article. “Really good.”
The music…God, Leo could have written about their songs for hours and hours—he just had to be careful not to cross any lines into what he was quickly suspecting was the true territory of the songs. Love songs. In Leo’s opinion, the best kind of love song—when the two people they were about were right there, in the same room as each other.
Logan had switched to the other arm, opening himself up to being taken by the hips by Finn and sweetly kissed.
After, Logan smiled a little at Leo when he took the stretching band back. Still guarded, but it was improvement. “Merci.”
“Yeah,” Leo said. “Or, you’re welcome.”
He winced at himself as Logan went over to drum a bit on one of his practice pads. Leo tried to pick up the song, but it was hard without the melody until Finn, waiting for water to boil, started singing.
Oh, I wish that I was someone else so I could watch us being.
Go and love a stranger so I can see how you hard you love me.
In his notebook, Leo wrote, In the middle of warming up—which involves more push-ups and stretching than I would have thought—O’Hara stops to make me a cup of tea.
Fuck. It sounded like a diary entry.
Warming up is taken as seriously as it would be by any sports team. Tremblay prepares his body as thoroughly as his instruments.
Was that too…? Leo set his pen down and stared at the page.
Tremblay stretches in front of me and I swear to God I can see every muscle in his back.
O’Hara just squeezed my shoulders. I heard Rooftop on the guitar for the first time and it wasn’t at a show, it was in his living room and he looked so sad. He looked so sad.
When they kiss, I want to watch the gentleness between them on loop until the end of time.
And an even quieter, even more secret thought: I want to be kissed like that.
“Here we go.”
Leo looked up. Finn carefully set down a steaming paper cup. “I put a little honey in it like mine. That’s what I have before we go on.”
“That’s perfect.” Leo smiled and held the cup up to his nose. It smelled sweet and a little like licorice. “I’ll consider it research.”
Finn smiled back for a moment and Leo was reminded of the first time he’d met Alex. They both had that soft stare. It was aimed right at Leo.
“Your hair’s the color of honey,” Finn said. Then he picked up Leo’s pen and wrote down, honey!!! then winked at Leo and walked away.
The show was wild and fantastic, as usual—and it rained. Rained. Hard. The screens showed Finn, red hair dark and dripping against his forehead, his face raised to the sky. Water flew up in droplets from Logan’s drums, backlit and mesmerizing. Leo was soaked despite the VIP tent by the time it was over and shivering a little in his t-shirt as the night cooled down.
He made his way backstage, trying not to drip on everything as he knocked on Finn’s dressing room door.
A grinning Finn with Logan under his arm swung it open for him. He was soaked through, they both were, but he didn’t seem to feel the cold. Adrenaline, probably. Finn held so much of it after shows he practically shook.
“We’re going out to celebrate and you’re coming with us.”
“Great,” Leo said. He wrapped his arms around himself, trying to fight the chattering of his teeth. “Where?” He was taking in Logan now. He looked—well, soaked and kissed. Maybe Finn was just extra affectionate after shows.
“Just a bar. My brother, some friends. And you because you’re coming.”
“And my sister will be there,” Logan said.
“Which one?” Leo asked—which maybe was weird that he knew there was more than one? But they had to be used to being Googled. Right?
“Noelle,” Logan said. “And her boyfriend, Thomas.”
“I won’t kill your vibe?” Leo asked.
“Everyone knows we’re doing your interview,” Finn said. “I think we should give you more than just, like, us fucking around backstage and, you know, working.”
“You guys are pretty serious,” Leo said. Which wasn’t very true. Finn was always putting Logan in headlocks, Logan constantly hid Finn’s things from him. “But thanks. I’d love to come.”
“Good,” Finn said.
When they began peeling off their sweaty and wet stage clothes, Leo kept his eyes respectfully down, mostly, and wished he had something to change into, too. He could try to run back to his hotel, but he didn’t feel like having to chase their party down. He resigned himself to being damp and hoped a drink or two would warm him up.
“Here,” Logan said, and something soft and warm was being pushed into Leo’s chest.
It was a sweatshirt—Finn’s sweatshirt, probably, by The Strand Bookstore logo on it. Though maybe it was Logan’s, bought in New York or maybe stolen from Finn.
“Oh…” Leo looked at Logan. Those green eyes really did deserve songs to be written about them. “Thank you.” Leo said.
He pulled the sweatshirt over his head and was sure it was Logan’s. It smelled like the cologne he wore—nothing too strong and intense. It really was just like he’d bottled something piney and sweet.
When he was sure no one was looking, Leo ducked his nose a little into the collar.
~
Somehow, suddenly, it was four-thirty in the morning. Leo was pleasantly buzzed, a little exhausted, and squeezed up against strangers in a booth. He wasn’t so pleased about the squeezed part, but it was a good vantage point. As it turned out, Finn was a dancer—even when not many others were dancing. He was just as good as he was on stage. All hips and smiles.
Logan was not a dancer—but he watched. Leo watched him watch Finn. There was a quiet sort of intensity to it. He chewed on the straw of his rum and coke, crunched on ice cubes. An hour later he was all but shredding a beer label, and had his eyes on Finn and he’d lost his hat somewhere—oh, Finn’s head. It was getting warm in the bar. The place kept the doors open and Leo was sweating in Logan’s sweatshirt, but he didn’t take it off. He could see Logan’s sweat, dark on his temples. Finn had to be sweating, too, but he didn’t look it. He just looked happy.
Finn wandered over to Logan and hooked his thumbs in his belt loops. He didn’t kiss him, but he got nice and close like he might, singing words to a song Leo didn’t know and grinning.
How had the world not figured it out yet? They might not be so obvious as kissing, but Finn and Logan certainly weren’t subtle. Was a narrative of that’s how they are, that’s their friendship really so strong?
With a smile, Logan shoved Finn back out onto the floor where someone joined him—two someones. Alex and a dark-haired girl Leo had seen around. For a brief moment, across the room, Logan’s eyes met Leo’s. Then he ducked out onto the balcony. Leo wasn’t positive it was an invitation, but he wouldn’t miss it if it was.
“Excuse me, sorry,” Leo mumbled to the guy next to him. It was a bit of a mess, making these people get up. He wasn’t sure why they were all sitting there. It wasn’t like it was easy to hear each other over the music anyway. Leo was happy to rise.
Remarkably, the night air felt cool. The balcony was higher up than Leo had expected, looking down at the city below. Logan had his back to Leo, elbows on the railing. He glanced behind him when he heard Leo approaching, and the red and blue city lined his profile. He looked just like he did on stage, only calmer. Quiet. Truer to how he actually was. Leo couldn’t image putting on a show like that every single night.
“I need a break from people sometimes,” Logan said, as if answering a question Leo had asked.
“Oh. I can go—”
“No,” Logan said. “I just mean crowds.”
“I bet,” Leo said. He went to the railing and mirrored Logan’s position. That was actually an old trick he’d been taught. Apparently it made interview subjects feel at ease. Really, he’d just wanted to see the city and feel the cold metal of the railing on his skin.
“It’s hot in there.”
“Ouais.”
“Finn really loves dancing.”
Logan cracked a smile and took a drink from his beer bottle. “You’d think he’d run out of energy.”
Leo laughed. “I’m out of it just looking at him.”
“That’s Finn for you…Realest thing in the world.”
Realest thing in the world. What a quote. Leo knew he wouldn’t have to write that down to remember it.
“Who is he dancing with?”
Logan swallowed. “Hannah. She was at Harvard with us.”
“Hm.”
“They dated. In college.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah,” Logan said, then glanced Leo’s way. “Before I took what was mine.”
Okay, hot. Leo had to smother a pretty pathetic sounding breath.
“Hm,” Leo said again. “Can I…Can I ask something?”
“That’s your job.”
“It’s pretty personal. And you don’t have to answer.”
“I know that.” Logan said, and then just waited, looking back out at the streets.
“What happened after high school and before Harvard?”
More waiting. More of that intense, Logan-silence. Part of Leo was pleased that he had such a thing to associate with Logan, that he’d spent enough time with him for that. Leo didn’t push him. He stirred the ice cubes in his drink and took in the rest of the balcony. A few chairs. Ash trays.
“We used this bookshop’s basement to practice at night,” Logan said suddenly. “All the other stores were closed, it was below ground, we weren’t going to annoy anyone.”
Leo could picture that. Guitar and drums, maybe one of their ever rotating bass players—it must get hard, trying to bud in on two as tight as Finn and Logan were. Writing and playing late into the night.
“But one night when it was just us there was this…” Logan shook his head. “Merde, I’d say snowstorm but it was more like… Just it was like the world blinked out.” Logan scratched wet-paper trails in his beer bottle’s label. “It felt like it was just the two of us left in the world.”
“You got snowed in?”
Logan nodded. His eyes were far, far away. Green, deep forest.
“We slept together,” Logan said quietly.
Alarm bells that every good reporter should have went off. Logan had been drinking. Leo had asked the question but it was still his duty to make sure it was truly okay to get the answer. “Does Finn know you’re telling me this?”
“Ouais. We talked about you.”
Okayokayokay. Leo felt like his entire body was trying to keep his heart from pounding at that sentence. Oh, to be a fly on that wall…
“Okay,” Leo said carefully. “Still, if you want to have this conversation another time—”
“I’m not drunk,” Logan said. He looked down at his beer. “I had one drink two hours ago and this tastes like shit, I’ve been holding it for a fucking hour.”
Leo couldn’t help but laugh a little. “Not sweet?”
“Non, not at all.”
Well, Leo was glad he knew. Sometimes with the stars, it was a problem. They spilled out gorgeous sentences and feelings no matter how Leo tried to stop them when they were loose-tongued and then wouldn’t let Leo use a word of it the next morning.
“And like I said,” Logan said. “We…I wouldn’t just be telling you this if Finn didn’t…You know.”
Leo thought of all the details he’d been picking up, and then even more unspoken ones. He could see that they wanted him to know. He just wasn’t sure why.
“It was the best night of my life.” Logan leaned on the railing, his hand coming up to touch his mouth. “It was… We wrote Only Two that night.” Logan smiled at the memory and closed his eyes. “Like, in twenty minutes, it was insane. Right after we…well.”
Leo loved that song. Back in high school, he hadn’t thought of it as being about making love, but being older now, he could tell.
There are only two
Things I want
For only the two
Of us
Two more turns on this dark road
Two more inches of skin exposed
Two more minutes of this bliss
Two more hours not to miss
Two more decades of your light
Two more centuries of this night
Only two (two) two (two)
Want me, too (too) too (too)
After this conversation, he’d never listen to it the same. He’d picture some grimy basement, and snow—and he’d picture Logan and Finn…
Two more inches of skin exposed.
No. No, Leo thought to himself. You’re professional. So very professional.
“And then I pretended like nothing happened.” Logan straightened. He turned his face away a little.
He could be professional and still let his heart ache at that. A memory surged at him without warning. A voice that he tried his best not to remember. Get the lights, will you?
“Why?” Leo tried to keep the word gentle. Logan seemed like he wanted to get this out, and Leo wanted to keep it at his pace.
“I don’t know. I got scared. I thought we’d never—I don’t know. We wanted this massive thing, to play our music, that almost no one gets and I didn’t want anything to mess it up. We fought. Finn wanted to be together. And then I said…I said things I didn’t really mean, but I said them. And he was crying.” Far away eyes again. “He was crying.”
Finn, crying. Leo couldn’t put it together with the grinning boy inside. When Logan turned to look, so did Leo. Finn was facing them, half obscured by a wall of people he was chatting to. It was hard to tell through the glass and with all the reflections from outside, but Finn might have looked at them.
“And…and we stopped talking.” Logan turned away. “We didn’t talk all of Senior year, or the summer before college.”
“But you got into the same school and showed up to the same dorm room.”
Logan snorted out a laugh, rubbing a palm over his face. “Merde. Oh my God, Leo, you have no idea. Our faces, seeing each other? Our parents’ faces? I thought I was going to die that first night, I walked in on Finn playing the guitar, and I thought I was going to die.”
“Wow,” Leo said faintly.
Logan let out a delighted laugh. Leo blinked, surprised, but couldn’t help but smile. That was a contagious sound. A rare one?
“Sorry, I mean—at least we can laugh about it now,” Logan laughed through the words. “I was going to lose my mind. I can’t tell you how much I missed him. I remember missing him now and I miss him when he’s, like, asleep next to me. That’s how bad I…” He broke off suddenly. Leo watched his throat move around a swallow. “That’s how bad I fucked up.”
Leo knew he wasn’t supposed to give his opinion to the subject of his pieces. As the writer, he was supposed to listen and organize. But his mind was telling him to comfort Logan. He wanted to do what he’d seen Finn do earlier, he wanted to know how warm Logan’s waist was through his t-shirt.
“On the topic of the songs you write together…” Leo took a breath. “Can I ask about Rooftop? You always leave the stage when Finn plays it. Is that—I mean, it’s a solo for him, I know that, but…”
Logan frowned and didn’t answer for a long time. Leo let him sit. It was a fine line, seeing that a subject had opened up, but then pushing too hard. Leo was beginning to worry he’d crossed that line when Logan spoke.
“I can’t listen to it. That’s why I leave.” Logan rubbed at his jaw and went to mess with his hat before remembering Finn had it. “Really, I can’t watch him sing it. I can’t watch what was my fault.”
Leo had had his suspicions since he’d walked into the dressing room, but this confirmed it. “It’s about you.”
Logan’s mouth was tight when he gave a small nod.
“I refused us for a long time.” Half a smile crossed his face and he sang the brief melody. “Long, long time.”
Leo smiled, too. It felt like it was okay to do. They were together now, weren’t they?
“It’s my favorite song,” Leo admitted.
Logan looked surprised. “It’s so sad. You don’t seem like a sad song person.”
“I don’t?” Leo laughed. “What kind of person do I seem like?”
Logan looked at him for a moment, then back at the city, shrugging with an almost bashful look on his face.
“And…” Leo felt a little giddy, like a sleuth figuring out a mystery. “Green Eyes.”
Logan laughed. “Ouais.” He took a sip of his beer and grimaced at the taste. “Fuck this shit about some French girl. Quote me on that.”
“Seriously?”
Logan sent him a look. “Maybe. Ask me later.”
Leo nodded. “Promise.”
Logan’s smile was gentler this time.
“When did you get together for good?” Leo asked, then realized what he said. “I mean—I mean, you look pretty solid, I didn’t mean to assume.”
Logan smiled. “Oh, he’s never getting rid of me now. I’ll never forget it. It was…maybe a year ago, I guess? No, a little more. While we were writing our most recent album. In Rome, actually, we rented this place and after those months, I didn’t think I’d be able to be far away from him again. And I mean, like, other side of the room. That felt far away.” Logan looked up, remembering. “We were pretty off-and-on until then, making out, fucking, not talking about it.”
Leo blushed. “Mhm.” Making out fucking not talking about it.
Logan sent him a sideways glance. “What?”
“Nothing, I’m listening.”
Logan narrowed his eyes playfully and turned his body towards Leo. God, his shoulders.
“Non, you’re a baby tomato. Tell me.”
“Oh God,” Leo laughed, putting a hand to his cheek. “Shit, I am, aren’t I? Well—No. Okay. All right, confession.”
Logan smiled and leaned forward. “Ouais?”
Leo pressed a palm to his own chest. “I am a fan. Quite a big fan of you both. I’m also. Well, I’m gay. I’m having a bit of a moment realizing two of the people around my age that I’ve always admired,”—You’re also unbearably hot, both of you—“shared more with me than I ever thought they did. Especially because—your music really helped me through some bad times.” It was Leo’s turn to look down. “Some bad guys.”
Now all that intense Logan-silence was trained directly on him.
“Bad guys,” Logan repeated softly. “Bad to you?”
He said it like it was madness, like he couldn’t believe it.
“It was a long time ago,” Leo said.
“What’s that mean?” Logan shrugged. “They were bad to you?”
“He,” Leo said. “Really just…he was.”
“Bad…Bad how?” Logan asked in a hushed whisper. He took a step forward, nearly right into Leo’s space.
“Nothing like—just…” Leo sighed as he stumbled over his words. “He wasn’t happy with how he wanted me. He probably wished he didn’t want me at all.”
More of those uncomprehending narrowed eyes, as if Jack, whose name Logan didn’t even know, had offended Logan by offending Leo.
“What a shit,” Logan said—and there was a snarl to it. Logan Tremblay, who had known Leo for all of a week, had just snarled about Leo’s shitty ex-boyfriend.
Leo laughed. “Yes. Understatement. Very.”
They were close now. Close enough that Logan could reach out and untuck where the collar of Leo’s sweatshirt had folded wrong.
“Oh,” Leo said. Logan’s fingers had brushed his neck and Leo fought that shiver hard. “Yeah, thank you for this. That rain got cold.”
Logan stayed quiet. He withdrew his hand, but he didn’t step back. When he looked up at Leo, he had that open look that Leo had only seen him give Finn.
“You know we chose you,” Logan said. “Right?”
Leo only had time to half let that sink in and half wonder what the hell it meant before a knocking came from behind them. “Hey-hey.”
They both turned to see a dark haired girl—this was Logan’s sister, Noelle. She smiled at Leo and held out her arms to Logan.
“Wanted to say bye, I’m taking off, Lo-bear.”
Lo-bear. Leo hid his smile in his glass but Logan caught it anyway as he hugged his sister tightly.
“Have a good vacation,” Noelle said and squeezed him tighter for a moment. She planted a kiss on his cheek and whispered. “You deserve it.”
“Merci.”
“Don’t wreck mom and dad’s house.”
Logan rolled his eyes. “When have I ever done that?”
Noelle pulled back and patted his cheeks. “Love you.”
Leo looked between them. Logan was different like this. He wasn’t a pop star. He wasn’t considered on of the best drummers in the current music scene—maybe the world. He was a baby brother.
“Je t’aime,” he said softly.
A version of the voice he saved for Finn, maybe. Leo wondered what it was like to hear them say it to each other. I love you.
People began spilling out on the balcony after that. Maybe noting that Logan Tremblay was out there. Leo and Logan got tumbled apart, but Logan caught his eye across the crowd. Between them lingered unfinished words. Leo shrugged one shoulder and gave him a smile. You chose me? What does that mean? What in the world does that mean?
Logan frowned. He set his beer bottle down, still full, and began to try and push through the crowd to Leo. It was hard. People kept wanting to speak to him. Logan looked like he was trying hard not to snap at them.
“Hey.”
Leo turned and found Finn there. Sweaty, tall, love-eyed Finn. He was definitely tipsy. No Logan-conversations for them tonight.
“Hi,” Leo said. He glanced back for Logan, but he’d lost him.
“We’re going to Logan’s family’s house in Nice tomorrow morning.”
“Oh.” Leo tried, he tried to keep his heart afloat. That felt—he didn’t feel ready. He didn’t want the week to end. Maybe it was hero-worship. Maybe he was starstruck. Maybe his heart didn’t know what to do with the proximity. Was Finn telling him that they were finished, that they were going on vacation—
Finn reached for Leo’s hand and tucked something into his palm, closing Leo’s fingers around it and covering it with his own. “I’ll send the car for you.”
The crowd whisked him away, too, leaving Leo standing in the summer night to uncurl his fingers.
It was a guitar pic, and scrawled across both sides in tiny writing, were two phone numbers.
#o'knutzy week 2024#o'knutzy#Logan tremblay#Leo knut#finn o'hara#finnlo#lelo#sunfish#band au#popstar au
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Can't stop thinking about an omega tommy being lonely all those years thinking maybe he's just too unloveable to be mated and not good enough because he doesn't have the typical omega physique that every alpha want in an omega and that until he met Evan😌
Oh my god, anon, now I can't stop thinking about it either. My hand slipped and I wrote it as a fic 😅
Also a special thanks to @sarastars for also giving me the ideas for this fic!
Also, sorry for making Tommy so out of character.
***
Tommy knew he would never find an alpha. He wasn't built like a typical omega. In fact, he was reminded of that every day at the 118 firehouse.
"Hey, Tommy!"
Tommy sighed, stopped loading the dishwasher, and got up. "Yeah, Deluca?"
"Bet you're used to bending, huh?" Deluca teased and made crude thrusting motions with his hips, but then he stopped and pouted at him. "Oh wait, you don't have anyone to bend for! How sad is that?" And then Deluca and his pals were laughing while high-fiving each other.
Tommy gritted his teeth and walked away without saying a word. He just wanted to leave this place. Go somewhere where he is actually respected.
"Don't let them get to you."
Tommy looked up from where he was sitting on the bench outside and saw Hen giving him a sympathetic look.
"They treat you worse and you're an alpha," Tommy pointed out and moved to make space for Hen.
"Yeah, that's true," Hen agreed and sat down. "They just want people to fit in a certain mold and when they don't-"
"-they make their lives a living hell," Tommy finished her sentence for her. "Do you ever wish you could work somewhere else?"
"I don't think it's any better anywhere else," Hen shrugged.
"I am more optimistic and think there is someplace out there where no matter who you are, you are treated right," Tommy replied.
***
"Hey, handsome."
Someone greeted Tommy and he looked up from his drink to see a beautiful brunette with gray eyes standing next to him giving him a flirtatious look.
He was currently having drinks at the bar with his teammates and to have a beautiful woman's attention on him in front of them flustered him.
"Do you mind if we talk in private? Away from your friends?" The woman asked biting her bottom lip. "I bet an alpha like you could show me a good time."
Laughter suddenly rang through the table, making Tommy cringe.
"Sweetheart, if you're looking for alpha then he ain't it," one of his teammates, Andy, told the woman.
The woman looked confused for a second before her eyes widened. "Ew! You're an omega?"
Tommy felt his heart shatter in a million pieces.
"You look so deceptive. Maybe stop taking steroids to make yourself look like an alpha," the woman huffed and walked away.
And then Tommy was left with his laughing teammates.
"She really thought you were an alpha!" Deluca teased.
"Yeah, maybe stop taking steroids, Tommy," another teammate, Gary, teased him as well and laughed.
Tommy wanted the Earth to swallow him whole but he had no such luck.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and saw Howard giving him a sympathetic look.
***
When Tommy could finally transfer to the 217, he felt like he could breathe. The 217 were a lot better. There were a few who teased him but it wasn't as bad as it was in the 118.
But then, years down the line, he was forced to transfer back to the 118. It wasn't his choice, but their firehouse ironically caught fire and the place had to be shut down, with everyone transferred to different stations. Since Tommy had a history there, they transferred him back to the 118.
Things had changed at the 118, though. Many of the alphas that he worked with were gone but Deluca was still there, much to Tommy's chagrin.
There were a few fresh faces there but one in particular piqued Tommy's interest: Evan Buckley.
Evan was a young, cocky guy, who seemed like he was a bit of an asshole but Tommy kind of dug that. Evan mostly stayed to himself but sometimes Tommy found him giving him looks he couldn't quite decipher.
But then something happened one day that made Tommy realize Evan wasn't any better either.
Tommy was about to go home and he had parked his car next to Evan's jeep. So when Evan approached him, Tommy thought nothing of it. That is until Evan cornered Tommy against his car.
"Hey, whoa, I don't want any trouble, okay?" The words left Tommy's mouth before he could stop himself. He was always so used to being defensive.
Evan smirked and said, "You're so hot, Tommy. I've been admiring you from day one."
Tommy frowned when he heard that. So Evan was even more cruel than the others. At least they didn't play with his feelings.
Evan pressed Tommy further against his car and Tommy felt his heart racing. "You're such a pretty omega. So fucking breedable." Evan's breath ghosted next to Tommy's ear, making him shiver. "Can't believe you're not already taken but maybe that's because you were waiting for me."
Tommy felt like crying. He hated being toyed with like this. "Please stop."
"Why?" Evan whispered breathlessly in his ear.
Instead of answering Tommy pushed Evan away and got into the car and left.
***
Tommy knew he was close to his next heat. But it was a few days away so he went to work anyway.
Before work, as he changed his clothes in the locker room, he felt a presence behind him.
"Hey, Tommy." It was Deluca.
Tommy sighed, put on his shirt, and turned around to face him. "Yeah, Deluca?"
There was something different about Deluca today. He had a small smile, and his features were soft. "Listen, I just- I wanted to apologize for treating you like trash for all these years."
Tommy was taken aback by that. "Uh what?"
"Yeah, but I was mean to you for a reason," Deluca said rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "I have feelings for you."
Tommy thought he heard wrong. Because there is no way Deluca of all people just admitted that he had feelings for him. "What?"
Deluca stepped closer to him. "I've had feelings for you for the longest time. But I was in a relationship. I couldn't do anything about it so I treated you horribly instead."
Tommy's heart started racing. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.
Deluca took a few more steps towards Tommy, trapping him against the lockers. He reached out to touch Tommy's cheek, who flinched at the gesture.
"You're so beautiful," Deluca continued to say.
The omega in Tommy was giving in to the touch. He couldn't help the whimper he let out.
Deluca put one hand on Tommy's waist and leaned in to bury his face in Tommy's neck.
Tommy's heart threatened to burst out of his chest. "W-what about your wife?"
"We're separated," Deluca replied and kissed Tommy's scent gland.
Tommy suddenly felt warm all over and slick started running down his thighs.
"Shit, you're in a heat," Deluca said and squeezed Tommy's waist.
Shit, having an alpha so close sent him into a premature heat.
"Sal," Tommy whispered when Deluca nuzzled his neck.
And then Deluca started laughing. He pulled away from Tommy and let out a full belly laugh. "Oh my god, that- I can't believe I held out for so long- I should get a damn Oscar."
Tommy stood there stunned as he watched the other man in confusion. But deep down he knew what was going on.
"I sent you in a premature heat with all that bullshit!" Deluca laughed even louder. "Jesus, Tommy, you're so pathetic." He wiped his lips with the back of his hand and made a disgusted face. "Gross, I actually kissed your neck."
Tommy felt his eyes fill with tears but he refused to cry in front of this bastard and he looked away.
"Aw, are you gonna cry now, little baby?" Deluca teased. "You're so desperate that you were gonna spread your legs for me and beg me to fuck you, weren't you? God, Tommy, can you be any more of a slu- "
Before Deluca could finish his sentence, someone grabbed him and slammed him into the lockers next to Tommy.
Evan snarled and his eyes flashed gold. "You fucking asshole!" He growled and slammed Deluca against the lockers again.
"Evan stop!" Tommy said weakly. He couldn't focus on anything. The alpha pheromones from Evan were too strong and the omega in Tommy was whining for the alpha despite Tommy's protests.
Evan immediately stopped. "You mess with him again and I will end you, Deluca," he warned Sal and let him go, immediately coming to Tommy's side.
"Tommy, you okay?" Evan asked him worriedly and touched his shoulder.
"Oh, you two deserve each other. The broken omega and the broken alpha!" Deluca spat out.
Tommy ignored him and instead focused on Evan's touch which made him whimper.
"What's going on here?"
Tommy heard the captain's voice and gulped.
"Buck attacked me!" Deluca complained.
"And I'll do it again if you treat Tommy like shit!" Evan growled.
"Tommy, are you okay?" Bobby asked him gently.
"No, I'm in a heat," Tommy whimpered again.
"Yeah, thanks to that asshole!" Evan pointed at Deluca. "He was messing around with Tommy and sent him into a heat."
"Is that true?" Bobby asked Tommy.
Tommy could barely speak. He was sweating profusely and slicking up. So instead, he just nodded.
"He's a lying who-"
Bobby glared at Deluca and flashed his eyes at him before he could finish his thought. "You're suspended. I want you out of my firehouse right now."
"Are you serious?! You're suspending me for that omega bitch?" Deluca growled and got up in Bobby's face.
"You want that to turn into a termination?" Bobby asked.
"Well, fuck this firehouse, and fuck you. Your house of misfits won't last long," Deluca kept on going.
"I'll take that as a yes. Take your stuff and get out. Right. Now," Bobby angrily told him.
Deluca huffed and left. Once he was gone, Tommy felt like he could breathe again. "Th- thank you," he said to Bobby. He couldn't think. Evan's proximity and his scent were too overpowering.
"I'm taking him home," Evan said taking Tommy's hand.
"I can't let you do that, Buck," Bobby got in Evan's way before Evan could pull him along.
"Bobby-"
"Buck, you are not Tommy's alpha and he is not in the right frame of mind to give you consent right now," Bobby told him.
"I am capable of consenting and I want Evan," Tommy replied. He hated being treated like he wasn't even there.
"You heard Tommy, Bobby," Evan told the other alpha and pulled Tommy along, taking him to his jeep.
Once they were inside, Evan put a hand on Tommy's cheek and pulled him close but kissed his forehead. "I know what you said back there, but I want you to consent to this when you're not in a heat," Evan said pressing their foreheads together. "Do you have toys at home?"
Tommy felt his cheeks heat up at that. "Y-yeah," he replied.
"Good. So we're gonna go back to yours. I'm gonna help you build your nest and then I'll stick around while you do your thing. Is that okay?" Evan gently stroked his cheek with his thumb.
"You- you can help me if you want. Like I told Bobby, I am capable of consenting," Tommy whispered and closed his eyes.
"I know, babyboy," Evan kissed his forehead again. "But until yesterday, you didn't even like me." He smirked.
"That was yesterday," Tommy replied. "This is today."
Evan let out a breathy laugh and kissed Tommy's eyelids. "Come on, let's get you home. You wanna give me your address?"
Tommy put his address in Evan's phone and Evan held his hand as he drove them back to Tommy's place.
Once there, Evan helped Tommy build his nest. Tommy directed him to where the additional comforters and pillows were and Evan came back with them and set them up on the bed. He finally took off his hoodie and gave it to Tommy.
"You might need this," Evan told him.
Tommy took the hoodie and took in Evan's smell. "Thank you," he said. "For everything."
Evan leaned in and kissed Tommy's cheek. "I'm right outside. If you need anything, just call me."
"And what if I just need you?" Tommy asked.
Evan chuckled at that. "You're gonna be fine," he told him and pulled away.
Tommy immediately missed his touch and whined. "Alpha, come on. I know you want me. So just take me."
Evan clicked his tongue and shook his head. "That's just your heat talking, babyboy."
Tommy huffed and climbed into his nest. "Do you wanna at least cuddle with me?"
"I don't think I'll be able to stop myself, if I touched you right now, babyboy. I can smell your slick and I can feel the heat radiating off your body," Evan told him.
"Then don't stop yourself. Do what you want to me," Tommy insisted.
"No," Evan replied resolutely.
"Do you not want me because I'm not your typical omega?" Tommy asked sadly.
"What's that even supposed to mean?" Evan asked. "You're a beautiful fucking omega whom I want to knock up so bad."
"You're lying. You want a pretty. dainty omega. Not someone like me."
" I don't know if you're trying to reverse psychology me but I can see myself mating with you, Tommy. I want to mate with you. But just not today. I want us to talk when you're not in a heat and then I want to make you mine."
Tommy felt a smile play across his lips and nodded. "Okay," he said.
"Okay," Evan replied and kissed Tommy's forehead one more time before leaving, letting the door stay slightly ajar.
Tommy took off his clothes but pulled on Evan's hoodie. He took out his purple dildo from the side drawer and lay back, circling his hole with it. He slowly pushed it inside and moaned. "Evan."
He slipped his hand under the hoodie and played with his nipples with his other hand while he started fucking himself with the dildo. "Evan, Evan, Evan," a litany of his coworker's name escaped his lips. He was loud enough that he knew Evan could hear him outside. "Please, Evan. Knock me up. Need your baby in me," he groaned as he started fucking himself faster with the dildo.
He imagined Evan on top of him, penetrating him over and over again, making him scream. Tommy stopped playing with his nipple and wrapped his other hand around his cock. He stroked it only a few times, imagining Evan's hand on it before coming, loudly screaming out Evan's name. He lazily fucked himself with the dildo as he came down from the high. If Evan would not fuck him, then Tommy wasn't about to make it easy on him.
#tommy kinard#evan buckley#sal deluca#bobby nash#hen wilson#911 abc#911 fic#911 fanfiction#bucktommy#kinley#tevan#omegaverse#ask
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wip wsunday, 2 modern au fragments and a bit of devotional. I *want* to post bits of my sanguinalia thing but I caaaan't. >:xxxxxx
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can't stop, won't stop (modern au, aephorul/resh'an, college/post-grad years; call it the sequel to gotta start somewhere. probably counts as a kinktober thing; the boys go toy shopping.)
Devotional isn't the silliest thing in my wips. it's this. this gets absurd. there are costumes involved. it starts off fairly innocuously, though.
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"Let me buy you something fun for my birthday." Aephorul sat down on the couch beside Resh'an and set his laptop on the coffee table.
Resh'an squinted at him. "That's not how birthday gifts work. And I know I'm bad with dates, but I'm pretty sure your birthday isn't for another three months." He frowned. "...it's not, right?"
"It was yesterday," he said gravely. "You didn't even wish me happy birthday. I was completely devastated. Absolutely bereft. Abandoned by my boyfriend-"
"You are such an asshole." Resh'an elbowed him sharply.
Aephorul managed to keep a straight face for half a second longer, and then lost it. "Your face! Oh my god-" He tried to fend off Resh'an's elbow again, but Resh'an nailed him in the solar plexus. "Oof- fuck- ow- this is abuse- motherfucker-"
He wasn't really sure what it said about either of them that this kind of thing ended up being foreplay at least 75% of the time. Not that he was complaining- well, maybe he was complaining a little. Resh'an fought dirty and his elbows were sharp.
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staycation: monday (modern au, aephorul/resh'an petplay)
this one is also very silly. most of the modern au is in aephorul's pov, so it's an interesting exercise to write resh'an's viewpoint, particularly when aephorul is being submissive.
I feel like I'm missing the point of petplay with this entirely, but I'm having fun with it.
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"Sure you don't want a spoonful of peanut butter?" he asked while he loaded the dishwasher. "Because I kind of do. Maybe some fruit? The grapes are still good."
"Grapes," Aephorul said icily, "are poisonous to dogs."
"You're so obnoxious." Resh'an smiled fondly. "It's almost like you want to be muzzled."
Aephorul stared down at the floor and didn't say anything. He was trying to hide behind his hair, to disguise the fact that he was blushing hard enough for it to visibly darken his cheeks. Aephorul was teetering on the edge, and it wasn't going to take much of a push to put him all the way under.
But Resh'an wasn't going to push; he didn't need to. Aephorul would get there just fine, all on his own.
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devotional ch 4 (barma'thazel/elysan'darelle)
why yes, this story has snowballed out of control, why do you ask? this chapter is probably just going to devolve into some good old fashioned monster fucking. who knows, though, maybe somebody will get pegged.
aephorul sends barma'thazel a gift basket after chapter 2.
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"This is the problem," she hissed. "You're a general, not some common prostitute."
"I am our Master's servant," he corrected. He ate one of the chocolates; they'd been enchanted to survive the ambient heat of this place, but it melted into velvety richness on his tongue. He closed his eyes and ate another one; it was as decadently delicious as the first, and it had some sort of crunchy center. Amazing.
"You really should try one of these." He held out the box. "It might put you in a better mood."
She looked almost like she wanted to fling them back in his face. "This- it's demeaning. You deserve- mmf!"
He popped one of the chocolates into her open mouth and tilted her chin up, forcing her lips closed. For all her skills with sorcery, Barma'thazël still moved faster than she could react.
Elysan'darelle's eyes widened with fury, and then scrunched shut as the taste of the chocolate hit her. Her hands flew to her mouth, but not before her tiny moan of pleasure escaped. When she opened her eyes again, she shoved Barma'thazel away from her and stamped a hoof in frustration.
#wip whatever#nattering#sea of stars#philosopher's bone(r)#barma'thazel/elysan'darelle#my fic#me when i realize that 75% of the stories in this series involve pillowfights or play-wrestling or scuffling like#ohhhh this is a Thing isn't it#aephorul outweighs resh'an considerably and it's all muscle; plus he did martial arts for years#elbows notwithstanding resh'an gleefully loses all of their fights#'slutty redheaded stick insect' vs 'sullen captain of the wrestling team'
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moth to a flame — k.sm
• pairing: kim seungmin x fem!reader x hwang hyunjin
• genre: infidelity (adultery), smut and fluff — MDNI!
• summary: maybe being caught up in a relationship for four years with the man you aren't in love with isn't that hard when you're two-timing him with the man that you actually love this whole time but what really happens after dark? — once your boyfriend is away for his business trip?
• rating: 18+
• warnings: smut, fem!reader, infidelity, foreplay (m.receiving), handjob, cumshot, begging, edging, overstimulation, switch!seungmin, unprotected sex, explicit language, biting (mentions of blood), creampie, teasing, choking, spanking, mirror sex, penetrative sex, cockwarming (if you squint), name calling, finger sucking, multiple orgasms, hair pulling, marking. Let me know if i missed something.
a/n: english is not my 1st language so yea.. i was inspired by those tiktok edit, the one with moth to a flame as the audio but idk man... should i make a part 2? it's going to be about hyunjin's back story with seungmin
- some lowercase are intended.
• smut below the cut.
You picked up your phone that violently vibrates on your nightstand, waking you up from your sleep. You crawled out from your shared bed with your boyfriend slowly not wanting to wake him up as you made your way to the living room "I just want to say that I miss you" a disembodied voice from the other line freshen you up. It's the voice that you've been longing to hear for the past week.
"I missed you too. Did you drink?" you asked him worriedly, never in your life he had called you around this hour, at 5 am - sure it's weird for you to have him like this. Being a bit sappy; after dark.
"A little" he answered with honesty while swirling a glass of an old whiskey that he poured for himself earlier. You can hear the sound of an ice cube clinking against the glass; it's an old whiskey that his father gave him, a long time ago.
"....we'll meet again soon" you reminded him, again; for the second time this week. Missing every inch of him tremendously with your whole being, with every inch of your skin.
"I know baby, I just wanted to let you know that I miss you. You can go back to sleep again. Good night, sweetheart. I love you" he mumbled as a warm smile crept up upon his face that you cannot see.
"I love you too", replying to him before you end the call. Walking back to your shared room with your boyfriend, tucking yourself in, beside him. Who has no clue on what is going on behind his back or - does he?
It's toxic. You know it's wrong to deceive your lover, your boyfriend but having Hyunjin by your side is a fever dream. He's such a gentle lover, a romantic guy, he's a man that every woman wishes to spend their time with forever, he's all man that every woman ever needed and you know that you're lucky to be with him. It's hard for you to let him slip through your fingers easily but the truth is,
he was never yours to begin with, no.
"Y/n, there will be a new art installation tomorrow at the exhibition, do you think you can go with me?" Hyunjin asked you out of the blue. It's usual for him to ask you out to random museum dates with him and you're not complaining, in fact, you enjoyed it, a lot.
"Sure, when do you wanna go Hyune?" you replied, as you shifted your gaze from your pancake to him, who is sitting down across from you with a new haircut and a new hair color - platinum blue. Making him look prettier than he already is.
"Next week, maybe? Once I'm done with my business trip, we'll see" Hyunjin tattered as he makes his way towards you, placing a gentle kiss on the top of your head before making his way to the dishwasher to wash his dirty plate.
"When will you be back?" you asked in a convincing calm manner, as if you're going to miss him when he's gone for the week or so. Leaving you alone with your little secret that you've been keeping for god knows how long, behind his back.
"Hmmm, honestly. I don't really know because my schedule is packed for this week and I still have a photoshoot to do with felix for cosmopolitan as well as attending Tod's event with Felix, too" he said with uncertainty clouding his voice. Exhaustion is well written all over his face, if only you could help him by sucking his exhaustion off of him, you'd be more than happy to help him.
"It will be boring without you here with me, Jinnie. I'll be all alone" you sighed, hiding the excitement behind your voice. Knowing that you'll be alone and free to do whatever you want with the other man. You walk towards his back as you hug his bigger figure, putting your hands around his waist, inhaling his scent while he's washing his plate and finishing it peacefully.
"Awh, is my princess lonely hmn?" he replied back, teasing you as he shifted his body to face you. He caresses your face carefully while studying your features, trying to examine the meaning behind your gaze as he gently plays with your hair, twirling and tucking it behind your ear.
"Of course I am, Jinnie. That's why I have you" it came out naturally, it tasted bittersweet on your tongue; you lied to him as you put your head to his chest, hearing the way his heart is beating only for you. Acknowledging the fact that the way his heart is beating is still the same for you as it used to be back during the college days. You like how he's devoted to you - too devoted just like a mutt.
"Do you want to pick some flowers with me before I go? Or tell me what to do to make it up to you, to make you feel less lonely when I'm gone, princess" Hyunjin always liked flowers, that's one of the many things that you like about him. He loves paying attention to you, even to the utmost details that are unnecessary. He's a romantic guy, sure you felt loved by him but - he can never replace the man that is carved into your heart.
"No, it's okay. I'll be okay, you should get ready for your flight today. I'll drop you off at the airport, I'll be with you" you stated, hugging him tightly as if he would disappear if you'd let him go from your embrace, this is how you make it up to him.
"Are you sure?" he asked back while pulling your body away from his body gently, tilting up your chin to face him as your eyes met his glistening eyes. The same eyes that used to make every woman's heart flutter when they see it, his hands wrapping your waist, pulling your body closer to him again as he connected his lips to yours. Placing a gentle bite on your bottom lips, you kissed him back. You know how to play this game, your own game. Deep inside you feel guilty but you can't just let him slip through your fingers, not now.
"Hyunjin," you whispered in between your kisses. "You should get ready for your flight," you reminded him as you pulled yourself away from his presence slowly. Ghosting your lips on his, he hummed in silence as a response to you.
"Wait for me while i'm gone" Hyunjin said while bidding a goodbye kiss to you before departing to his flight.
"I will, Hyune. Be careful. Text me once you landed" you said, hugging him not wanting to let him go, just yet.
You deserve an oscar for putting an act that you did in front of him. You're happy that he's gone for a week or so, in fact you wished that he'd be gone for a month, to let you spend some more time with your secret lover.
The truth is, Hyunjin was never yours to begin with, no. You were just his rebound at first until he fell madly in love with you and sadly your heart belongs to someone else, but he had to let you go — for the sake of Hyunjin.
The other man thought that someone like you can't be with someone who is like him. it's as if an asteroid hitting the earth if he's with you and it's unfair for you, too.
When it comes to the other man, he just couldn't stop comparing himself to Hyunjin; who had everything, who aced every major during his college days. He looked like a broken pot next to a vase, he can't be with someone who is as smart as you, as pretty as you and you didn't care. You love him so much that you'd do anything just to be with him — and it includes deceiving your lover, along with the four years old relationship. you are willing to go this far just for him, for the man that you love.
You pick your phone, dialing his number hoping that he would pick up your call, you miss him, you miss being by his side, you miss his presence.
"Minnie, don't forget about our date that we arranged for today" - you said through your teeth, softly smiling
"Yes, of course baby" he swiftly say on the other line as he begins to get himself ready
"I'll be at your place in around 15 minutes" you tattered while walking back to your car, revving the engine.
"Hurry then, because I miss you so much sweetheart" Seungmin gently said. Hoping to see you soon, couldn't wait to embrace you in his arms as he couldn't be with you due to your relationship with the other man.
Here you are, entering Seungmin's penthouse as if it's your own, pressing each number on the smart lock passcode that he gave you, years ago. "Minnie?" you called out to him, making your presence known to him
"Yes, sweetheart I'm here" he answered you, from his room, still getting ready for the date that you've set up.
You approached him in his room, your gaze fixated on how pretty he looked right now, standing in front of his body mirror while fixing his bleached bangs. He sees you and he couldn't contain his own puppy-like smile, smiling widely just like a Cheshire cat, braces out. - "Minnie, my minnie" you voiced, hugging him from the back, trapping him in your presence
"How's my love doing?" he asked, still fixing his hair while staring at his and your reflection
"I'm doing great. What about you baby? i miss you so much, it hurts" you answered, resting your head on his back, as it muffled your voice
"Awh, I missed you too baby" he answered, shifting his body to face you, as he cup your face, kissing your lips gently, sharing his warmth to the same lips that Hyunjin kissed this morning, erasing the trace of Hyunjin's lips on you.
You have to admit that Hyunjin might be a great kisser who has a plump and soft lips and you do like Hyunjin's kiss but with Seungmin's kiss, it's different, it's passionate, slow, it's sweet — never boring, especially when you can feel his braces against your lips and against your tongue
"Minnie.." you whimper, still maintaining the kiss. You missed him, you miss this, this moment, his touch, everything about him.
He broke the kiss while pulling your body closer, not letting any space get in between the two of you after he heard you calling his name "what's wrong, sweetheart?" he asked with concern.
"I miss you so much. Can't you just let me be with you?" you asked
"Baby, we talked about this back then, didn't we? we can't" he answered while planting a kiss on the top of your head.
"You do know it damn well, Seungmin. We can do it, I'm willing to risk it. My heart is yours to begin with and you know that really well" you exclaimed, feeling unfair and frustrated because Seungmin is just being too stubborn
"I know, I know darling. You always say you'd give him away for me, but you can't do that to him. He's good for you" he uttered, gently patting your hair
"No, Seungmin. I was just his rebound, I never loved him. I've loved you since the moment I first laid my eyes on you. It's you, it's always been you" you spoke softly feeling defeated, all these years of loving him in secrecy and silence, he still didn't get how you're willing to do anything for him, how much you love him.
"Yes and I do love you too, you know that really well baby" he coos, still hugging you tightly as he pats your back lightly, reassuring you "maybe when the time is right we can be together but for now, let's have our date yeah?" he added, redirecting the conversation, not wanting to talk about it any longer.
"Yeah, let's just go" you replied weakly, feeling a little upset while pulling yourself away from him as he place his arms around your waist "we can talk about it later, baby" seungmin voiced, placing a kiss on your forehead
"My Seungmin look so pretty today" you praises, staring at his eyes, making him blush
"You just can't say that easily" he said shyly as both of you were making your way to his door, getting out of his penthouse.
"I can and there isn't anything that I wouldn't do for you" you said blatantly without thinking twice. You meant every word that rolls off of your tongue.
"You can't say that baby, you have Hyunjin," Seungmin replied, testing the water.
"And you can't say that too, it's about us right now, not me and Hyunjin" you stated curtly as you roll your eyes, you don't like it when he brings up Hyunjin whenever you're with him —it's a killjoy.
"I wanna make you mine, love" Seungmin blurted, filled with guilt that's clouding him, blaming himself. If only he could turn back time, he wouldn't have told you to be with hyunjin. He would've chosen to be selfish.
"Then do it, you coward. I'd risk anything for you and I'm hoping that you'll do the same, pretty boy" you jokes as you make your way to his newest black Mercedes .
"I will, one day - let me drive, pretty" he said, as he opened up the side of your door. You've fallen hard for him ever since the first time you saw him, everything about him makes you wanna own him in a way that words can't describe.
The date was fun. every minute you've spent with Seungmin, reminds you why you fell for Seungmin in the first place. You got 3 missed calls from Hyunjin, resulting in him bombarding your text, saying that he has arrived and his schedule is already packed, telling you that he won't be able to contact you as his manager won't allow him to have his phone.
"Is that Hyunjin?" Seungmin asked you from behind as he creeped to engulf your body, pulling you into his embrace. You're back at his place to spend the entire week and time with him, while your lover is away—far from you.
"Yeah, he said he won't be able to text or call me. I'm going to miss him." You uttered purposely, just to make Seungmin jealous. It's fun to see Seungmin getting all jealous when it comes to hearing about Hyunjin.
"Then be with him, be with that mutt of yours, baby" he said while tackling you down onto his bed, laying on top of you, planting a lot of kisses all over your face
"Mhm, sure" you teased
"But does he know where your heart truly lies?, hmm?" he asked back, burying his head on your neck as you tilt your neck a little to make some space for him "it's right here with me y/n, remember that" he reminded you while biting and sucking your neck, leaving marks.
"Seung," you called him as the way he sucks on your skin is getting harsher, you can feel his teeth biting your skin as his braces also make contact with your skin. You grab a fistful of his hair while tilting your head a little bit more to the side, allowing him to suck on you better, marking you.
"Hmn? has Hyunjin ever done this to you? does he know your favorite place to be touched? does he know the reasons that you cry? or does he ever make you feel good?" he asked you, as he began to pull away from you to face you, admiring the marks that he left on your neck as you stay silent
"You're mine to begin with, sweetheart. remember that" he stated, making you feel helpless.
"I know I'm yours, minnie. yours" you whispered, this is it. This is the poison that you've created and you'll swallow. Knowing that you're going to leave Hyunjin, sooner or later.
"You know that you can't keep doing this right, sweetheart?, sooner or later we're gonna get caught" he said, warning you
"I know it really well, Seung. why would you even tell me to be with him in the first place?" you asked him genuinely, it's not fair for you. you've never loved Hyunjin in the first place, it's Seungmin, it has always been seungmin.
"it's just-
"You know minnie, it's fine. I'll do anything for you as long as you're happy" you cut him off curtly, sick of hearing how he didn't deserve to be with you because he's nothing compared to Hyunjin when he is the man that you need in your life - he's your twin flame.
"baby..." he called you as he lay down next to your body, facing you as your eyes were staring at his bedroom ceiling, his mirror ceiling to be exact, looking at yours and his reflection "it's my fault. I'm the one who told you to be with Hyunjin back then, I should've never done that." he said with regrets echoing through his voice. he felt a weight weighing down his chest, making him hard to breath whenever he thinks about it
"yes, and I have to admit that's stupid" you teased him
"hey", he replied half yelled, jokingly while hugging you from your side. You heard your phone ring and as soon as you saw the caller id you wasted no time picking it up, letting yourself go from his presence as you sat down on his bed, earning a whine from Seungmin as he also sat himself down.
"Hey Hyune '' you greeted, putting on a show but maybe this time you can make it a little bit more fun now that you have Seungmin here with you.
"How's my princess doing?" Hyunjin asked you with his mellow voice that is filling your audio senses.
"I'm doing fine, i miss you Jinnie" you whine, starting to play your own little game, hoping that Seungmin would notice it
"I miss you too, do you want anything princess?" Hyunjin said as he asked you a question on the other line. You can only imagine him saying it with his plump pouty lips which makes you miss him more.
"Yes, I want you here with me," you joked lamely, just for the sake of making Seungmin jealous.
Seungmin is sitting down right behind you, listening to your little conversation with your lover, you turn your back to face him as you maintain your conversation with Hyunjin. Your other hand made its way to play with Seungmin's hair, tracing your hands around his face, ending it with squishing his face softly, making his lips turn into a pouty one, you let out a soft chuckle, leaving a peck on Seungmin's pouty lips.
"How's France Hyune?" you asked him sincerely, being curious about it
You let your hand go from Seungmin's face as you made your way towards his balcony. Walking away from Seungmin just to feel the cold night wind breeze on your skin, you leaned forward to his railing, still on the phone with Hyunjin, staring down at the big city from Seungmin's balcony.
"France is great. I want to take you here with me, someday, you've been wanting to visit France, right? I'll take you here, one day princess" he confesses genuinely, you can feel his sincerity through his voice, another thing that you like about Hyunjin.
"Sure Hyune, I'll be waiting for that day to come. We can visit many museums and art exhibitions as much as you want, we should do it together" you said as your voice softened, imagining how exciting that would be as you felt a pair of hand hugging your waist from behind and a chin landed on your right shoulder, the one where your phone is on your ear. Seungmin is embracing you while eavesdropping on your conversation with Hyunjin. He is jealous, jealous that he can't do what Hyunjin does.
He tilted his head closer towards your phone, to eavesdrop as you could feel his hair on the back of your hand while holding your phone close to your ear. "Felix is here with me princess, he said hi to you" he said, letting you know "tell him that I say hi too" you said.
You can no longer feel seungmin's chin resting on your shoulder but instead you feel him sucking on your nape like a vampire, he knew that it's one of your most sensitive spot - fuck, you thought. "Sure princess, we're about to go now. I'll talk to you later" Hyunjin said, it's as if he knew what's going on, "I love you, princess" Hyunjin stated, making you freeze, "say it, princess, say it back" Seungmin mocked a whisper.
One of his hands slithered under your shirt to your breast, squeezing it harshly — shocking you, you slap his other hand that's on your waist lightly "I love you too, Hyune'' you stated back as you can feel your throat becomes dry after saying those meaningless words to him. You hung up your phone, ending Hyunjin's call.
"Fuck you, what was that for" you lashed out to him, he throws a chuckles at you as he back hugs you, again "then fuck me, baby, I miss you" he speaks nonchalantly "no thanks sir" you joked.
"Did you mean that?" Seungmin suddenly asked you with a small voice as you put your hand on his hands, caressing it, you leaned back on him a little, to feel his comfort.
"Which one? i don't know, tell me minnie" you teased him, you love pressing his buttons, making him mad, you like seeing his face when he's angry. It makes him hotter.
"Don't do that, don't say that when I asked you a question" he warned and that's when you knew that Seungmin took the bait, you spin around to face him, still being hugged by him
"I don't know, min. Tell me" , still teasing him, as you cupped his face with your hands, bringing yourself closer to kiss him. Your lips collided with Seungmin's lips, kissing him gently to reassure him that he's the only one you love, he is where your heart lies.
Seungmin knew damn well that you love him but the thought of you leaving him is eating him alive even though he knew that you won't leave him, he knew how to pull you in closer. You're loyal to him and he wanted to hear it from you, from your mouth, that you didn't love Hyunjin. He wanted to hear that those words were meaningless when it's for Hyunjin.
You break the kiss after a while. The moon is bright and the night is getting colder as time passes. You are under the moon with Seungmin basking in the light, you stare at him just to make sure that you will remember this moment for the rest of your life.
How pretty his face looks under the moonlight, how his eyes are so clear that it almost looks like you can see your reflection in them, those whiskey eyes that makes him look more adorable, his nose, his lips, everything about him is perfect and you know that can't let him go, you're trapped in a spider's web.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked, breaking the silence, caressing your cheek
"What else, it's you." you answered him while slowly pulling yourself away from his body. Walking back into his room to lay yourself on his bed, you love the scent of his bed, it's comforting.
"You still haven't answered my question, sweetheart" he said, following you from behind as he joined you on his bed, cuddling you.
"Of course I didn't, minnie" you stated while your eyes are glued to your phone, playing with your phone, not paying any attention to him.
"That's great then" he spoke, snuggling himself into you
"I know"
"I love you," Seungmin blurted out of the blue, it is rare for him to say those three words, while being in this secret relationship with him, you can almost count it with your fingers by how many times has he ever said those words to you because he mainly show it through his actions.
"Mhm" you mumbled, still not paying any attention to him as you're still busy answering Hyunjin's messages
"Did you hear what I was saying?" he asked you flatly, a little annoyed
"I did, I heard it loud and clear Seungmin"
"Then say it back like how you say it back to Hyunjin" he convinced you, he whined
You turn off your phone while getting up from your position while Seungmin does the same, you sit down closely in front of Seungmin who is now leaning his back to his headboard, in between his legs, facing him—hell, his bed is big. you bring your hand to the side of his face, your thumb is caressing his cheek, noticing that it's not as chubby as it used to be
"Say it back, baby" he pleaded to you as he held onto your hand on his face as he became desperate "please…" he added before he moved your hand from his cheek, bringing it closer to his lips, sucking two of your fingers. You stay quiet, watching the way he is sucking your fingers, saliva coating your finger as you can feel the warmth of his mouth and his tongue moving around your fingers.
You pushed your fingers further to the back of his mouth, pressing it against his warm tongue "suck it" you whispered as he's maintaining a direct eye contact with you, obeying you while looking at you with his prettiest doe eyes.
You pulled your fingers away from his mouth after a while, Seungmin whined, feeling empty and desperate "do you want me to make you feel good, pretty boy?" you asked him. Your other hand rest on his thigh, caressing it gently, sending a shiver to Seungmin's skin
"Yes please, it's been so long since you've touched me. I need you" he answered back desperately.
He brings his face closer to you, ghosting his lips on your lips "please" he breathed out before his lips clashed against your own, moving it slowly while your fingers tangled his hair, tugging at his scalp, earning the prettiest moans from him.
"Take off your pants" you pulled away from the kiss as he took his pants off hastily. Throwing it somewhere across his room before he sits back on his bed, spreading his legs wider for you to sit in between. No longer leaning on his headboard but rather leaning back on his arms to support his entire body weight.
His hard cock is now fully on display in front of you. You moved forward closer to him as your hands begin to stroke his big cock slowly, playing with his tip - his most sensitive part, lightly rubbing it as your other hand play with his shaft, Seungmin let out a quiet moan, head thrown back, eyes staring at his own reflection on his mirror ceiling with you in between his legs helping him to get off, brows furrowed, his mouth slightly open - this is his bliss
You pumped his cock painfully slowly, you don't want this to end quickly, teasing him, you love teasing this man to an extent where he will just cry and beg for more, "faster, please" Seungmin whined as he held your hand out of desperation. Getting frustrated by your pace, "no touching, pretty boy. Keep your hands off of me, we're just getting started" you said softly, letting go of your grip from his cock for a moment as he let go of your hands, fingers gripping his own sheets for dear life before you stroke down his cock, again. your pace is getting a little faster, stroking down his cock as he lets out a whinny brittle moan that turns you on, before you slow down your pace again. Making him grow more frustrated with your slow pace, he is on the verge of crying from pleasure
Seungmin begins to feel like there's wave thrashing around inside of him after you stroke his cock in a faster pace, his thighs begins to shake "more, more, mo..r plea..se, i can...t yo..u can't do th..at" his words fumbles, minds were too clouded with piled up pleasure to chase his high that it makes him hard to construct a simple sentence "say it clearly, minnie. use your words, tell me what you want" you were having fun teasing him as you go faster and faster.
"cum, I want to cum" Seungmin's cock began to twitch on your hands as his tips begins to reddened, you knew he's about to cum, so, you let go of his cock from your grip, edging him. Not letting him get what he wants, you didn't want this to end too early.
"p-please, i need to c-cum.." he begged you, as he's tightening the grip of his fingers on his sheets. If only he could see his face and his flushed cheek right now; it makes him look prettier. "cumming already? not until I let you, pretty boy. you should see how pretty you look right now, look up, look at yourself" you praise, while he sighed quietly, left with no choice but to obey you. He shifted his gaze from you to his mirror ceiling as he stared at himself, he looked helpless, he looked like a mess, he looked pathetic with his position like this. legs wide open, hair tousled, hands gripping his bed sheets tightly, thighs shaking, cheek slightly tinted pink, as pink as a tulip petal.
His cock is still throbbing as you put your thumb on the tip of his cock, rubbing it against your thumb softly, your other hand went under his shaft, grabbing the base of his cock making him jolt as he stares at you with his glossy eyes, you want to look at him, his face .
you start to stroke his shaft slowly as your other hands begin to play with his reddened top, not breaking the eye contact with him, you paced faster, making Seungmin threw his head back in pleasure "look at me minnie, let me see those eyes", he tried to bring his head back to look at you but it's fruitless, you stop your pace. squeezing the head of his cock in between your fingers to gain his attention
"I'm sorry, baby, I-" you squeeze his tip harder, making seungmin let out a loud moan "stop doing that - I can't take it" he whispered, breath hitched
"No, Seungmin, you can take it" you voiced back as you pressed on his tip more harder this time, making him squirm "no, please, let me cum baby" he pleaded, on the verge of crying, his eyes becomes glossier because of the unbearable amount of unreleased orgasm piling up inside him.
You edged him a few more times, you love hearing his pitiful whines as he mewl out loud, letting out lewd sounds as it fills his room, blabbering some irrelevant words, tears staining his face, hands still gripping his sheets, his hair is a mess, drenched by his own sweat. You love this sight, the sight of him like this is turning you on more as it makes you throb down there while you hear him moan "please, please I can't hold it anymore, it hurts" he held your hands, trying to stop your movement but you went faster instead "I'm gonna cum, fuckkk" he cried out. his heart began to beat faster, he breathed irregularly, chest going up and down faster than normally as he felt another shockwave of pleasure washing over him, running down his spine.
"You wanna cum minnie?"
"Mhm" he nodded quickly—thighs shaking uncontrollably
"You can cum, baby" you stated after toying with him for god knows how long. He covered his face with one of his hands as he could feel he's about to cum, preventing you to see his face "put your hands away minnie, let me see your pretty face, look at yourself in the mirror" you said while keeping your pace steady as you feel his whole body trembling, thighs shaking as he's trying to close his legs from the orgasm but you held his leg open, spreading it wider. Seungmin puts his hand away from his face, allowing you to see his face in this messy state while his other hand is searching for your hand, intertwining it while he is not in the right state of mind, yearning for you.
Seungmin let out a long moan before you felt him cumming all over your hand, cumming in cloudy white thick sticky ropes onto your hands making a mess, while he is a crying mess too, broken moans coming out from his pink lips, he swore he saw god — he went to heaven and back
You begin to stroke him again, fisting his dick without waiting for him to come down from his high "w-wait, stop, please i can't, too much, too much" his word stumbled out of his pretty lips while crying louder each time you stroke his sensitive spot. You love how Seungmin is so vocal, you like hearing him whimpering, whining, begging, moaning and crying out for you out of desperation for more.
"You can minnie. One more time, I know you've got it in you" still stroking down on his shaft, not letting him rest. You like how helpless he looked and it didn't take long for his second orgasm to wash over him. His cock throbbed on your hands and before he knew it, you took off your pants and positioned yourself to sit on his cock facing him, using his cum as a lubricant before he cum for the second time.
Fuck—you missed him being inside of you, like this. His length is stretching your cunt so good "shit- min, so fucking big" you want to feel him cumming inside you, filling you up with his cum.
"Y-you're so tight baby, so warm," he grunts painfully between his cries, the sudden feeling of your warm walls clenching his cock makes him moan louder as he digs his nails onto your thighs, pain stinging you "cum inside minnie" you leaned your body forward to him, your hands holding onto his biceps on as you grind on him "you feel so good, god, I miss you so much Seungmin" you whispered as he hugged you, burying his head into the crook of your neck while you're burying his cock deeper into you "you take me so well i-i'm gonna cum, fuck" he moaned in your ear as his body shakes while releasing his cum inside you, filling you up fully into your core, you can feel it dripping out of you.
"Your thighs are shaking so much minnie" you point it out to him, his shaky thighs are sending a vibration against your body. "I know" he admitted shyly.
You took a box of tissue that was on top of his nightstand to wipe your sticky hands from his cum before caressing his hair gently. His body is still shaking from the post orgasm "you did so well baby," you assured him, patting his back while he's still trying to catch his breath, trying to come down from his high
"Shit" he whispers out of breath, nibbling on your neck, chest heaving up and down trying to catch as much oxygen to fill his lungs "let's get you clean, minnie, I'll help you okay?"
He shakes his head, signaling a no "not yet, let's stay like this for a while" he said, trying to collect himself back, cock still buried deep inside of you - "sure" you stayed in your position as he wishes
"mmh, stay still. stop moving around" he hissed while placing a slap on your bare ass because of your sudden movement "sorry baby" you apologized, feeling a little guilty since he's still sensitive.
"fuck, that was so good, my brain was fuzzy" he whispered, before looking at you, crashing his lips into your lips as a sign of thank you
"you did good too, minnie, you look pretty" you said while fixing his sweaty hair as he got flustered from your compliment
"C'mon min, let's clean you up" you initiated, trying to lift yourself up from your position just for him to hold you down, not allowing you to get off from him "I said, not yet, princess" he started to thrust his cock into you slowly, you let out a sudden moan.
"Are you sure you want to do it now, Seungmin?" you asked him, making sure that he doesn't do this just because he feels forced or feels the need to satisfy you back. You want him to do it only if he wants to "you don't have too if you don't want it, minnie".
"mhm I'm sure, I want it, baby" - he answered you while his other hand is fondling your clothed breast, thrusting into you slowly, really slow - too slow to your liking. making you needier, wanting to feel him all the way to your core, fucking you senselessly hard
"f-faster, please minnie...fuck me" you pleaded as you're getting touchy, touching seungmin everywhere. you know that he's doing it on purpose, to get back at you for what you did to him earlier "no, princess. be patience"
"fuck you" you cursed him while his cock pistoning slowly inside of you. "You are, right now, pretty" he kept on slowing his pace. his hands made their way to your ass, slapping it multiple times as you let out a moan, liking the way his palm met your bare skin, creating a loud slapping sound. you were sure that your ass is red enough by now.
"god, you're so frustrating Seungmin" you gave up, you ride him yourself, putting your hands on his shoulders to support yourself while you're bouncing and grinding on his cock like a rabbit in their heat, reaching for your own high as he watches you attentively riding his dick, Seungmin secretly loves having you on top of him.
"you just can't be patience and wait yeah?, princess" - he mocked
"s-stop calling me princess," you whined as you can feel your orgasm coming, really soon "minnie help me, please" you were so close and you were desperate at this point, you need him to make you feel good.
He switched your position, by now he's on top of you pinning you down to his bed fucking you so hard, eyes clouded with lust "you look so good beneath me, baby" the sudden quick friction is making your whole body shaking from pleasure, head buried down to his pillow
Seungmin is sick for having a mirror ceiling installed, you looked up to his mirror ceiling upon curiosity, "minnie look at us" you grabbed the back of his hair, tugging at his scalp, causing him to let out a grunt while you're forcing him to look up, to look at the reflection of his own body colliding into yours
"You like that? did Hyunjin ever do this to you?" he asked, quickening his pace, thrusting deep inside you.
"Stop bringing him, Kim" you clenched your walls that's wrapping is dick, annoyed by his demeanor while you earned a soft moan from him.
"my princess," - he mocked while tucking your messy hair behind you ear, making an eye contact with you. "he makes me feel so good, he fucked me dumb and raw, Seungmin." you blatantly lie to him, tired of hearing Hyunjin's name.
"oh, really?" he pretends to be shocked by your statement, his fingers lightly rubbing your clit, shocking you as it sends you another shockwave of pleasure that you can feel in the back of your throat "I'm gonna fuck you so hard you forget his name, princess" he nagged
"Stop teasing me so much, Seungmin". you place a light slap across his face, light enough to create a sound of your skin slapping his cheek. Tired of his games while his dick is ramming you so hard. He returns the slap back to you, slapping you hard across your face multiple times, leaving a red mark on your cheek while he is thrusting his cock deeper and faster, "is this what you want?, my love? you like it when I'm rough on you yeah?" he snarled at you.
"r-ruin me, minnie" you plead to him, you're nothing but a moaning mess, your whole body is trembling from the upcoming orgasm, breath hitched on your throat, head buried deeper to his pillow. You took his hand, placing it on your lower neck, motioning him to tighten his grip on you lightly as you held your breath.
His slender fingers wrap around your lower neck, gently applying little pressure to the sides. you like this, you live for this moment, you swore on your life that only Seungmin can make you feel like this.
"Should I call Hyunjin and tell him that I get to fuck with his dearest little girlfriend while he's away, princess? look at you" each thrust is getting sloppier as he's also trying to reach his high too. He put one of your legs on his shoulder, holding it tightly while fucking you deeper, sending you to another realm—you're praying to him, begging him to go balls deep.
"Call him, film us, send it to him" you spat back with a hoarse voice, threatening him.
"Do you think he'll like seeing you like this baby?. look at you all begging and moaning for my cock, look at how messy you are, look at yourself in the mirror" he praises you, his hands forcefully tilting your chin up to see yourself getting fucked by him.
"minnie, min..deeper, i w-want to feel you more, you feel so good minnie" you cried out while trying in vain to hold him. You're writing his name all over your tongue and all over your lips over and over again, like it is your only prayer, eyes rolling back to find your sanity while your brain is all foggy from lust, your hands are numb from the pleasure.
His pace begin to slowed down, fucking you deep and raw trying to make sure that you can feel every curve and inch of his thickness of his cock, hitting you in your deepest spot that you never know it existed everytime he thrusted. The sound of you skin slapping against his skin is getting more louder, his room becomes hot—hotter than hell
"m-min, too big, you're so big" you mewled out to him, weakly, you were beyond cloud nine by now. His hand that's on your leg searched for your hand, to interlock it tightly with yours, sharing his warmth to you, letting you know that he loves you
"my love, so pretty. You make me feel so good, so good for me baby. I love you so much baby," Seungmin confessed while quickening his pace. "you look even prettier in between my legs, minnie." your other hand reached to touch his hair, fixing his bleached bangs that are covered by his sweat, allowing him to see better once you slicked his bangs up.
"I-i'm gonna c-cum minnie" you stated, trying to talk coherently. His grip on your neck became tighter, slowing down the oxygen that went inside to your system as you feel the lack of oxygen become clear the more pressure he applies "you look so good with my hands around your neck" Seungmin stated while sending a shiver down to your spine
"seung-" you moaned his name desperately
"I know baby, I know" your walls clenched his cock tightly a few times as you're throbbing down there, "s-stop it, too tight" he can't take the way your walls clenched around his cock, it makes him feel overwhelmed. You were both a moaning mess by now, screaming for each other's name.
He pushed his cock deep inside of you, burying it as you can feel it twitching inside of you, "minnie, minnie I can't hold it" you whined loudly. You wrapped your legs on his waist pulling him to your body closer as you cum, coating his cock with your warm cum. He slowly let go of his grip on your neck, his fingers getting rid of a strand of your hair on your face, the other hand's holding your hands tighter while making eye contact to you, staring at you like you're his world
"Baby, I'm cumming" Seungmin warned you, his thrust is getting sloppier and messier each time "cum inside, fill me up" you begged, his body crashes on top of you. His lips met your collarbone, biting it harshly, you hissed as you could feel his braces grazing your skin. you're sure that you're bleeding while he's trying to enjoy his orgasm. "minnie, i-it hurts" you complained but he didn't hear you, his orgasm took control of all of his senses.
He can feel himself cumming soon as he plants his cock into you as deep as he can before filling you up, causing him to let out a long whiny broken moan while his cum fills you up to your stomach. you felt so full and sticky. You can feel his cum overwhelming and dripping everywhere in between your thighs to his bedsheets
The aftershock of your orgasm is too great, it makes your legs feel like jelly. You took a train to hell to feel heaven and back, trying to gain your senses back from the great amount of pleasure while Seungmin is trying to get as much air to his lungs.—you knew that deep inside this will cloud your memory
"That was so great, baby, are you okay? how are you feeling?" he asked, sighing still panting. You can feel his warm breath around your neck, you wrapped your hands around his body, hugging him. feeling the warmth of his skin against yours.
"I'm fine, I feel good." you answered him, still trying to come down from your high, catching your breath
"let me see you" seungmin lifted his body up from you slowly to check on you, on the places he went rough "oh god" he panicked. Pulling himself away from you too quickly, making you hissed, feeling overstimulated from the sudden movement of him pulling his cock out, while your walls are still throbbing from the orgasm.
"I'm sorry, but you're fucking bleeding" Seungmin screamed, face went pale as he saw blood pooling on your neck from your collarbone, you held his wrist, not letting him run around across his room like a madman while he's on that state
"calm down, minnie" you said softly,
"How can I?, did it hurt?, did I go too rough on you?" he bombarded you with multiple questions at once. Guilt is written all over his face as he's trying to hold himself from crying, feeling bad that he went too rough on you.
"It's fine, it's only a small cut min, We should clean ourselves up Seungmin" you offered, avoiding the conversation
"no, no, let me take a look at it first" he insisted, hands trying to reach your cut, looking at it
"Let it be Seungmin, I'm okay." you assured him, cutting him off, drifting his attention from your cut
"please. please just listen to me for once y/n." he sighed, closing his eyes. Not wanting to deal with your antics and your stubbornness, Seungmin is on the verge of crying, he feels like he's at fault, he feels guilty for making you bleed.
"Fine," you gave up. tilting your head to the sides, letting him take a look at your wound "that's pretty big." he muttered, feeling upset at himself while rummaging through his nightstand drawer to look for an aid kid.
"I'll clean it, tell me if it hurts" he tells you before cleaning the blood attentively, while putting some iodine on the cut gently with a cotton "does it hurt?" he asked you, lightly putting a bandaid on your collarbone "not really, it's fine minnie. I'm okay" you reassured him once again.
"I'm so sorry, i went to harsh on you" he apologized, placing a kiss on your forehead "I may or may have not left some...marks" he confessed,
"It's okay baby, I love you too" you replied to him, slightly giggling while trying to get up from his bed slowly.
"You heard me?" he asked, baffled. He thought you didn't hear him, his head was running wild the moment he didn't hear you saying it back, his brain was filled with the thoughts of you not reciprocating his feelings back
"Of course, stop being silly" you giggles, slapping his thighs out of habits when you laugh
"Tell me that again" Seungmin pleaded, eyes piercing into yours
"I love you, minnie"
"I love you too, let's clean ourselves up. you're so messy, baby" he stands up first before helping you stand on your feet.
As soon as you're on your feet, you feel his cum dripping down into his floor staining it with the cloudy white substance making you feel all empty all of a sudden, you were frozen. this is the first time it has ever happened "that is so much cum" seungmin broke the silence innocently "yeah, most of it is your cum" you pointed it out. "yours too, baby"
He walked you down to his bathroom bedroom, you turned on his rain showers to the coldest water temperature, as you bask underneath it washing the hot temperature from your body as well as the exhaustion while you look to the side to see the sight from his see through window glass on your side, allowing you to enjoy the night city view.
Seungmin comes closer to you, shampooing your hair "isn't too cold?" he asked you. The least thing that Seungmin wants right now is a cold shower. you opted him to use his bathtub but he refuses to do so. here you are showering with seungmin while he's shivering due to the cold water hitting his skin.
"You're still so stubborn, seungmo~" you said while getting out of the shower, wrapping himself with towel before you wrap your own body with one of his new towel
"It's been so long since the last time you call me with that nickname" he chuckles, reminiscing the old days where you used to hang out with him, sticking with him everywhere he go
"You liked it?"
"Of course, it's cute"
You can hear your phone violently ringing on Seungmin's nightstand all the way from his bathroom, notifying that there's incoming calls from Hyunjin.
"You should pick it up," Seungmin said, reminding you while drying his hair as he makes his way to his messy room.
"No, just let it be" you refuse to pick up Hyunjin's calls. Not wanting to talk to him while you're with Seungmin, thinking that you can just lie about not picking his calls because you're asleep
"Yeah, i think I'm gonna clean my room" he said from across his room, starting to take off his dirty bed sheets before putting a new one
"I'll help you, minnie," you replied to him, walking towards his room once you're dressed with his clothes and pants.
"baby, do you wanna go somewhere right now?'' Seungmin asked whispering, while hugging you from your side, snuggling his head to you. not wanting to wake you up harshly
"Like, right now? it's barely 7am Seungmo" you answered him with your eyes closed, still exhausted from the things you did with him earlier today
"Yeah, we only have a week for ourselves before Hyunjin came back from his business trip, I wanna go somewhere with you this time" he speaks as his voice become smaller at the end of his sentence, feeling sad that he can only get to spend a little time with you while Hyunjin get to be with you as long as he wanted too.
You felt bad, his words stung your heart even though he didn't mean it to be that way. This is why you didn't want to agree with him when he told you that you should be with Hyunjin publicly while being with him secretly. "I'll go with you everywhere you wanna go minnie, let's go" you faced him, hugging him back sharing the same amount of warmth under his blanket while caressing his hair.
"Really?" he opened his eyes, eyes bloodshot red from the lack of sleep. "Yes baby, we should get ready" you stated as you opened your eyes, still cuddling him "where do you wanna go?" You asked him this time as you pulled away from him to get up from his bed.
"Let's go to jeju and book a private villa, I'll look for the plane ticket right now" he says recklessly, you know that Seungmin isn't a person who'd do everything without planning it first. He's an organized man and it's new to see him like this just for the sake of spending time with you.
"That sounds fun but what about your work minnie?" you asked him, reminding him about his company. Of course you were shocked by the sudden last minute trip but you're happy that finally you can get to spend some time with him.
"Jeongin will do everything for me" he assured you while you're packing everything into the suitcase. You've left quite a few of your clothes at his penthouse frequently whenever you're visiting him in your free time, whenever Hyunjin is away.
"Oh that's nice" you retorted as you're getting yourself ready, washing your face and brushing your teeth. "I got the flight tickets and it's at 9 am, we have to hurry," Seungmin exclaimed as he began to frantically move to his bathroom to wash himself. "Slow down seungmo," you remind him.
"baby, can you dye my hair?" Seungmin asked you, while laying down on your lap. you've arrived at the villa trying to get some rest for a while before going somewhere with seungmin. "yeah I can, what color do you want it to be min?"
"Hmmm, I think, light brown?"
"That's cool, what about your bangs minnie? Are you going to dye them too or let it be?"
"I'm gonna let them be, I like it" he stated and before you could reply to him, your phone rang - of course it's Hyunjin who's calling, you pressed the green button on your phone with hesitation, lazily answering his calls
"Hi princess, how are you? I miss you! I actually bought something for you" Hyunjin exclaimed, voice pitched high, excited to give you the gifts that he bought once he's back.
"oh really?," you asked back, acting all curious while playing with Seungmin's hair, who's laying on your lap
"It's a surprise. you'll see it once I get back" hyunjing answered you cunningly now that he got your attention.
"How's the photoshoot going with Felix?" genuinely curious about his photoshoot and the concept. You know that Hyunjin is a good poser, everything looks good on him even if they put him in an ugliest outfit - he'll make it look good and it's something that only Hyunjin can pull off.
"Actually, it went pretty well" he giggles "I'll give you a couple pictures" he stated.
"Send me a lot of picture, Hyune" you chuckled back, jokingly
"Will do, princess. I have to go to a meeting with felix now." he chimed, as you hear him rustling around getting ready
"yeah, be careful Jinnie"
"I will, bye princess"
"bye Hyune"
"I love you" Hyunjin stated, not expecting any answer from you
"I know Hyune, don't love me too much" you joked at the end while ending Hyunjin's call. Seungmin's still laying on your lap playing with his old phone. Not long after you end the call, your phone vibrates, notifying you of an incoming text from Hyunjin. He sent you a lot of pictures of him and Felix posing for cosmopolitan.
You can never lie about the way Hyunjin look, he will always look good but this Hyunjin is hitting different - the way his hair is styled, his eyebrows slit and the way he's posing for the camera, looking at its lens directly with the camera, making it feels like he's looking right into your soul. "he look so hot" Seungmin blurted, peeking into your phone to see what makes you quiet
"Yeah" you agreed with seungmin's word. indeed hyunjin is hot and all but is just that you can't see yourself with him "do you like him?" Seungmin asked, curiosity is killing him
"no?, why would I like him?" you question him back
"Because he's better than me" he admitted to you, his words are deceiving you as it enters your auditory senses.
"No Seung, what makes you think like that?" you asked him while you turned off your phone, putting it away from yourself. Your gaze drifted to Seungmin who is now closing his eyes while humming a song. You stroke his hair softly.
"Because you deserve someone better than me" he answered you quietly with no emotions displaying on his face
"You don't mean that, Seung. Why?" you asked him back. You were on the verge of crying, your heart feels like it has been torn apart by a dagger stabbing you. Every word that comes out from his mouth is hurting you, and by the fact that it comes out from the man that you love with all your heart, makes it worse. You can't understand him. no, even if he tried to explain it with every vocabulary that existed; you will never understand him.
"I don't feel like I'm....enough y/n" it took Seungmin years to finally say that to you,
It took him a lot, it cost him his vulnerability to be seen by you. It's not easy for him, never. He lived his life filled with regret ever since he told you to be with Hyunjin - he felt stupid.
And that's the cherry on top, your chest tightened, you felt sick to your stomach, your breath hitched. you felt like the world had stopped rotating, you stopped stroking his hair. "...please don't stop, do it again" Seungmin said quietly, bringing you back to your senses
"Seungmo...I've always loved you. I was made to love you, for years I have yearned for you minnie, you deserve to know that. you're more than enough. you deserve everything minnie" you added, placing a kiss on his forehead before you started to stroke his thick hair again.
"do you think so?" he asked, his voice sounded as thick as his hair and brittle while looking for more assurance from you — his home
"yes baby, you're more than what you think you are minnie, you're my everything. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you" you answered him with honesty. It's hurting you too, it hurts to see him like this
"It was my fault for putting you in the relationship that you've never wanted in the first place, I love you so much and you're hurting too because of me" his voice begins to heighten at the end of his sentence while he's sniffling
"It wasn't your fault, it's not your fault minnie, never..part of it was my fault too. I should've not listened to you and stay with you"
"I know but sometimes, I don't always know. you know? but thank you for staying and for loving me" he murmured, opening his eyes slowly as his tears threatened to fall off from his eyes, making it difficult for him to see before tears escaped from his eyes, rolling down to his face.
"you're crying...don't cry, I am here with you. minnie-
you have stars in your eyes. I love looking at it" you said while wiping his tears off gently as he closed his beautiful eyes. You place a gentle kiss on his eyelids. "don't cry, minnie. It's going to be fine" you assured him as you took his hand and brought it closer to you to place a kiss.
"I hope so too. Please stay with me forever even when I'm not at my best version of myself" he wishes before he let out a soft sob
"I will minnie. You know, I've been thinking about breaking up with Hyunjin. I cannot bare the thoughts of being apart far from you anymore" you began to speak, still stroking his hair
"Then do it, be with me" he added, no longer crying; afraid of losing you to Hyunjin, losing you to someone who used to be his own best friend. Seungmin has lost a lot of things, be it small things or big things during his lifetime but he can't lose you, not you — too.
"I will baby - and I hope you're ready to be taking the fall for me" you joked at the end. You wish you could end this all easily, after all you're still a human with a heart —too. Seeing Hyunjin cry after seeing Seungmin cry will be the end of everything, as much as you don't feel a thing for Hyunjin. He's still a human too.
"I will, anything. Just to make you happy, my love. your happiness is my happiness" Seungmin replied while snuggling into you.
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𝐚 𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 | 𝐬𝐨 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞
��� 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞 ┊ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 ┊ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →
pairing: minho x felix (minlix)
genre: dancer!minho/artist!felix. brothers best friend troupe. college au. age gap (abt 4 years). minho pov. extremely dark themes throughout, including smut - MDNI, 18+ only.
word count: 4.7k
the playlist 🗡️
a/n: half of this chapter was fluffy and cute, and the other half was incredibly angsty lmao. sorry about that guys, but I just can't seem to HELP ITTT when it comes to minlix!! 😩😭 I just finished writing chapter 10 for this fic... idk how long its gonna be, but I still have a few more ideas for chapters I wanna do, so I'm aiming for around 15 total - but we'll see if that changes depending on how I feel and shit 😜 hope you guys are enjoying, and thanks for all the love and support~ 🤍
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ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sɪᴛᴇs (ᴛʜɪs ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴs). do not copy, spin-off, or write inspired work based off of this fanfic without full permission to do so. ©ʙʟᴏssᴏᴍᴡʀɪᴛᴇsᴛʜɪɴɢs ⤐ ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ
̶﹒⊹﹒ɪ sᴇᴇ ᴀ sᴀᴅ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ sɪɴɴᴇʀ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪʀʀᴏʀ !،، 🌌 𖥻 𓂃 ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ʜᴀʀᴅ, ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴍʏ ʟɪᴠᴇʀ╰╮ 🌑
As it turns out, by the grace of all things and every God high up in the sky, Minho and Hyunjin ended up passing their exam with final colors. Their professor loved the contemporary part of their dance, and it was well-received across the entire class.
With one of the biggest exams for the semester done and over with, Minho found that he had more time to himself for once. He only worked his part time gig at the arts studio three times a week, so when he wasn’t busy helping with the teaching, he was back at home in his dorm, studying up the material he had missed for the past few weeks because of that stupid exam.
“You’ve been awfully focused these past few days, I’m surprised…” Chris said, breaking Minho out of his daze of thought. He was curled up on their living room couch, furiously typing away at his laptop’s keyboard.
Looking up from his screen, he stared at Chris who was busy devouring a bowl of rice with spam he had just made for himself. He had just got back from the campus gym, so he was subsequently drenched in sweat.
“Yeah, I’ve got a lot to catch up on since one of our biggest technical exams is finally done.” Minho said, taking a glance at his phone and seeing the few texts he had missed while he was focused on studying.
Looking at the time, he read that it was just past eight in the evening.
The texts were all from Felix.
Minho’s heart skipped incremental beats as he unlocked his phone and scrolled through the text thread.
Today
8:13pm
I know youre probably busy with work or homework… But I wish we could hangout sometime.
Sorry if that sounds really fucking weird, its just— this week’s been a lot.
Instantly, Minho felt his fingers typing out a response.
Chris is leaving soon to go to work. If you want, you can come over to our place.
In the back of his mind, Minho could sense the urgency of Felix’s tone. A tiny voice inside of him whispered warnings— that inviting him over wasn’t a good idea and he should stay out of Felix’s way. Yet Felix texted him back in an instant.
I’ll be over in an hr. I’ll bring my homework and we can study together :)
Just like that, Minho was turning to Chris and watching him place his bowl into the dishwasher. “Are you still going to the studio with Changbin to work?” He asked, trying to seem nonchalant. Like he hadn’t just invited his best friend’s little bother over when he knew Chris wouldn’t be home.
But there was no crime in that. There was nothing in the friend code or university code that said you couldn’t hang out with your friend’s little brother.
“Mhm— I just gotta take a quick shower then we’re meeting up for a couple drinks before working,” Chris said, walking out of the kitchen and towards his bathroom. He tore off his shirt, displaying sculpted abs and chiseled arms. “Probably won’t be home til early tomorrow morning. You know how much Changbin loves to change tracks up at the last fucking minute.”
Minho let out a tiny chuckle at that. Changbin could be incredibly decisive at times, and it drove Chris crazy. But his best friend also realized that Changbin was a genius, and Chris had never regretted a song they had changed based on Changbin’s feelings. “Well just text me when you’re heading back, yeah? So I can make us breakfast or some shit…” Minho wailed across the dorm as Chris closed the door to the bathroom.
He heard a faint “will do” just as the shower turned on. And with that, Minho leaned back into the cushions of the sofa, taking in a deep breath. His legs shook a little bit, and his heart was still thrumming in his throat. Even still, he made to focus on his computer screen and homework instead of thinking about the night ahead.
The hour passed by in a quick flutter of movement on Chris’ end of slow heartbeats on Minho’s end. Within thirty minutes, Chris was showered and out the door, waving Minho a silent goodbye since he had his headphones on. Immediately, Minho was able to relax into his spot.
But not for long, because soon after there came a stark knock on the door.
Minho didn’t even register he was getting up from the sofa and that his legs were moving until his arm was reaching out and opening the door.
And just like that, there Lee Felix was.
Standing in the limelight of the dorm behind Minho’s back, he smiled up at Minho with shining teeth and pretty pink lips.
Felix was dressed head-to-toe in pink. He was wearing an oversized baby pink and white knitted checker sweater, with dark pink shorts to match and a fushica puffer coat to match.
“Hi.” Is all Felix said, smile glinting up at Minho, blonde tresses a little wind-swept from the walk over to his dorm.
Leaning against the doorframe, he widened it a bit to open up a gap. “Come on inside, it’s drafty out here in the hallway.” Minho ushered him forward, and as Felix slipped through the threshold, Minho caught whiff of his sweet scent - of strawberries and cream and everything good in the world.
Felix gently placed a bag down on the counter, taking out a bag of chips and some candy. “I hope you don’t mind that I brought snacks. I can never study on an empty stomach.”
Minho just leaned against the fridge in the kitchen, watching as Felix’s delicate fingers opened up the bag of peach rings. “You don’t have to apologize about bringing food over, Lix. I get it, trust me.” Minho’s focus landed on Felix’s legs, the skin there smooth and milky. His booty-shorts were so fucking short, Minho could make out about half of his pert asscheeks. Minho grabbed ahold of Felix’s jacket as he began to take it off, hanging it up in the nearby closet. “Aren’t you… cold?” He asked, motioning with his eyes up and down the length of Felix.
The younger man simply chuckled lightly, grabbing his tote bag from off the kitchen counter and trailing over to the living room. “Nah, I get really hot in the library so I don’t let to dress in thick layers.”
“That’s where you were when you texted me?”
Shrugging slowly, Felix perched himself in one of the corners of the couch, slipping out his drawing pad. “Yeah, I— I couldn’t really focus there today. Thought maybe a change of scenery would give me some inspo.”
Minho took a playful bow of courtesy, slinking back to his own spot on the other end of the couch. “Glad our dorm could be of service to your studying then.” He gave Felix an easy smile, positioning his laptop back on top of him.
It was silent for a few minutes, as they focused on their own work. Minho always liked to play music when he worked, and he mostly liked jazz. So the soft jazz coming from his laptop played in the background in a relaxing kind of way.
“How are you… otherwise?” Minho started, not taking his attention away from his screen and he continued the research he needed to get done for one of his midterm papers. “Over text you said this week’s been hard.”
Felix was quiet for a few moments, seeming to gather his thoughts. In the background, Minho could hear the distinct sound of a pencil scribbling against paper. “Yeah, uh— just bullshit with my friends, that’s all. Drama like that really drains me, ya know?”
“You wanna talk about it?” Minho asked, scrolling through the internet to find anything that was relevant to his research.
“Not really… I don’t wanna be a bother.”
That made Minho stop in his tracks.
His eyes slinking away from his computer screen, he gave Felix a knowing look. “You’re never a bother, Lixie. And talking about your problems can help relieve some of the tension sometimes.”
Felix ran a frustrated hand through his hair, and Minho swallowed around the lump he felt in his throat at the sight of his earring-covered lobes glinting in the lamplight of the living room. “I know— I just… I wish I had friends who weren’t so wishy-washy all the fucking time. It’s exhausting sometimes.”
“Hmm, that makes sense…” Minho started, resting his head against the back of the plush sofa. “But, from the looks of everyone at the party that night, it seems like your friends have— a lot on their plates to begin with.” By a lot, Minho meant substance abuse. But there was no way in hell he was going to grill into Felix about his choice of friends just then. Not when he could sense Felix really needed him in that moment.
After that, Felix grew quiet again. Minho took a peek over to his corner of the sofa and noticed his hand moving across the canvas paper, drawing an outline of a human shape. His nimble fingers moved so fast, it felt like Minho blinked and he was already done shading the outline. In that moment, he realized just how talented Felix was.
“What are you working on?” Minho finally asked, pressing his spine into the couch to get a better look. His focus was entirely too much focused on Felix in that moment, but he couldn’t help it.
Felix turned his sketchbook towards him. “It has to be a human portrait centered around romantic realism. I just can’t seem to fucking find inspiration.”
Making a funny pose on the sofa, Minho wiggles his eyebrows at Felix. “What? And I’m not your muse?”
“God, you’re so fucking stupid— just… shut up.” Felix laughed, chucking a nearby pillow at Minho’s face. But Minho’s reflexes were incredibly fast from dancing all the time, so he caught it mid air and threw it back at Felix’s stomach. He let out a squeak of surprise, not expecting Minho to move so quickly. “You are a menace.”
“Yeah but you love it…”
Minho didn’t know why he said what he said. The words just… seemed to slip out of his mouth, before he was even registering what he was saying.
Felix just stared at him for a few moments after that, before he stood up from the sofa abruptly. “Imma grab some snacks, I’ll be right back.”
He was fleeing the scene. Leaving Minho’s side because he had made the situation uncomfortable. He had fucked up, like always. So he decided to focus back on his research. Felix returned soon after, a bag of chips and two drinks in hand.
“Is that… soju?” Minho raised an eyebrow Felix’s way, his heart skipping a little bit at the thought of Felix drinking alcohol. That definitely wasn’t a good mix for either of them. Or for Minho’s heart.
Shrugging nojcholantalty — like drinking alcohol while trying to study isn’t something out of the ordinary for him — Felix pushed one of the cans towards Felix across the living room’s coffee table. “Sometimes liquor helps me focus better— gives me inspiration, in a weird way.”
Just then, Felix made to roll his sweater’s sleeves up. Minho tried not to be nosy, or pushy. But he couldn’t help his eyes trailing after Felix’s arms. They were bandaged up or raw anymore. Instead, the fresh scars were completely healed and fading into the myriad of other ones.
He knew it wasn’t his place to pry or to even feel concerned. They had barely spoken in over five years, and him blowing up at the party that night was one of the causes for Felix to start again. But even still, he felt a huge weight lift off of his shoulders at the sight of Felix healing again. By the looks of it, it seemed like he had been clean for a while. And Minho hated himself so much for the fact that he was a part of ruining that journey.
“I’m fine, Min. Don’t worry.”
Felix’s voice cascaded around Minho’s ears, soft and quiet. Forcing him out of his daze of thought that he had gotten lost in by staring at Felix’s arms. Minho could feel the expression on his face melt just a little bit, as he watched Felix eat a couple of salty shrimp chips and take a long swig of his grape-flavored soju.
“That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He found himself saying, reaching across the sofa and giving Felix’s bare knee a light squeeze. “I’m glad you’re feeling better, even if it’s just by a tiny bit.”
Motioning with a tilt of his head, Felix gave Minho an easy smile. “Now quit distracting me, because we both have work to do.”
After that, the entire dorm fell into a serene kind of quiet. The hours passed by, the clock ticking gradually with each assignment that Minho got done. He was surprised to find how focused he was, with half a bottle of peach-flavored soju in his system and an increment amount of potato chips filling his belly.
Even still, the quiet presence of another person right beside him helped to comfort him into an ease of focus. Felix had turned on a relaxing ambiance on the tv, so along with Minho’s jazz playlist still running, the sound of crickets and wind chimes played in the background.
Felix was altogether very quiet, completely honed in on his craft. And he was right— the alcohol did seem to give him some form of inspiration. He sat cross-legged next to Minho, and the older man distinctly noticed, in the back of his mind, how with each hour that passed, Felix grew a little closer to him on the couch.
By the time midnight rolled around, they had been studying for a good four hours. Minho’s brain felt like mush from reading and writing so much, so he decided to give it a break for the night. Turning to Felix’s place beside him, he realized that the younger one was gone from his spot.
He was so focused on his computer, he hadn’t noticed him get up from the sofa and trail over to the bathroom. Felix notebook was laid out on the coffee table, and Minho’s temptation got the better of him.
Honestly, he couldn’t help it.
Minho’s hands were holding onto it’s thick binding before he even thought better of it, fingers gently flipping through the pages. There was all kinds of compositions— of landscapes, outfit ideas, food. But he stopped his flipping when he got to a… certain page.
The character that Felix had drew was smudged at the edges, the lines indiscreet and fluid with the movement of the person. By the looks of the broad shoulders and muscular legs, Minho assumed it was a man. The coloring of the piece was in shades of dark charcoal and pencil-grey. Altogether, it was a beautiful drawing. It looked like the man was in the middle of an intense dance segment, arms spread out and legs twisting as he rolled over into his next routine.
In the corner of the piece, Minho could make out a small, black bird.
It was a…
Raven.
Upon realization of what the smudged shape in the corner of the page was, Minho could feel his heart drop into the pit of his stomach.
Because…
The raven had always been his favorite bird.
He remembers the deep talks him and Felix used to have in their childhood, about the raven and other birds like it. About how relatable they were and how misunderstood they were.
Just like that, the feeling of all the puzzles piecing clicking together throbbed inside Minho’s head.
The drawing was… based on him.
Fuck, it was him.
The character, with it’s greyed lines and romantic fluidity was Minho.
He couldn’t stop staring at the page, his eyes drawn on the raven that was perked in the corner, looking down on the dancing figure.
And before he could even make his mind up on what the drawing was actually about, the sketchbook was getting ripped out of his hands abruptly.
Minho’s head shot up, eyes wide as he met Felix’s stormy gaze.
“I told you I don’t like people looking at my personal work.”
“But you failed to mention how I am drawn in your personal work.” Minho pushed back, watching as the fury starting brewing on Felix’s face. It darkened his eyes and caused his lips to flatten out into a straight line.
Felix walked over to his side of the couch, shoving his supplies and sketchbook into his canvas bag. But his movements were a little bit halted, his cheeks a little pink. The bastard was drunk already, with just one bottle of soju.
“What do you know about my artwork? You have no idea who my muse is—” Felix said under his breath in that deep voice of his that he only got when he was upset. Then he was pulling away from the sofa and giving Minho a sardonic kind of grin. “Thanks for the invite. It’s been… enlightening.”
Minho could feel his heart breaking a little bit in his chest.
Why had he been so stupid?
Fuck— why had he looked at that stupid sketchbook, when on the first day of their meeting Felix had explicitly told him he didn’t like people looking at his art?
But he couldn’t seem to help it in that quiet moment— the book had called out to him, prompting him to grab ahold of it even against his better judgement. And then he found the drawing of him and he couldn’t stop—
He reached out to Felix just as he was passing his side of the couch. And before he could think any better, Minho was grabbing ahold of Felix’s wrist and stopping him from moving with a gentle tug. “Lix, I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to pry, I had no right to,” he started, his touch around Felix’s wrist forcing the younger man to turn and look down at him. He was still frowning, but the furrow in his brow was gone and Minho could already feel his resolve melting slowly. “And I don’t mind. Being your muse, I mean. I find it— flattering.”
“Who said anything about you being it?” Felix asked, but the way that the words trembled on his lips a little bit, Minho could gauge that he had hit the nail on the head.
Then, Minho’s other hand was persuading Felix to drop his tote bag on the floor. That prompted Felix to stare down at him with wide eyes. Slowly, Minho brought Felix close to him. He was still sitting down on the couch, but his laptop was long gone from his sight and closed.
“Please, stay. I like having you here,” Minho said in a quiet whisper, both his hands squeezing Felix’s a little bit. Then their fingers were slipping between each other’s easily, and Minho caressed the soft flesh of his palms. “Besides, you’re too tipsy to make it home tonight. It’s too risky.”
“You don’t actually want me here tonight, Minho. You just don’t want something happening to me when I leave here—”
“Don’t say that. You have no idea what I want.” Minho’s words interrupted Felix’s tipsy, pity-induced speech.
Brushing his fingers against Minho’s, Felix stared down at him. His gaze had shifted a tiny bit, his cheeks coloring a brighter shade of pink. “Oh yeah? And what’s that… Minho?” Minho’s name curled and danced off of Felix’s tongue like the sweet whisperings of a mysterious faerie.
Coming a little closer to his space on the couch, Felix squeezed Minho’s hands. And with one look at him, one look at his messy blonde tresses and the way his pink oversized sweater swallowed up his entire frame, the way his hot pink booty shorts had ridden up on his thighs even more throughout the night…
Minho already knew the answer to Felix’s question.
He had known since day one.
He had just been too afraid to face it.
To come to terms with all of his feelings, thoughts, and wants.
But for once, he was tired of running.
He was tired of being the first one to leave. To pull away. To end things.
So in that moment, Minho did the only thing his half-soju-addled brain could process.
“You're what I want. What I've always fucking wanted,” Minho whispered finally, his words halting everything else in the dorm around them.
The energy between them shifted, and for a moment, Felix was still staring down at him with red cheeks. Still holding his hand and studying Minho's face and the older man stared up at him from his seat on the couch.
Then, all of the life was draining from Felix's face. Minho watched it happen right in front of him, as Felix yanked away from his grasp altogether and straightened himself again.
"You're more ridiculous than my high friends, Minho." Is all he said, before he was taking ahold of his tote bag again and grabbed his empty soju bottle. "But I'm not even surprised, because you've always been like this."
Frowning Felix's way, Minho watched as he neared the kitchen and tossed the bottle into the recycling bin. "Been like what? What the fuck are you talking about Felix-" His voice was short, matching Felix's clipped one.
Turning around, Felix leaned against the kitchen counter and leveled Minho with a dark glare. "Don't fucking pretend like you didn't just tell me last week that you wanted to be only friends," waving a finger in the air and shaking his head in disbelief, Felix's tone grew louder in his anger. "Don't fucking play with me like that Minho, I won't take that bullshit from anyone... but especially not from you!"
Minho was silent for a second, watching as the rage flooded Felix's entire system as he slipped on his shoes to leave. Minho was standing up from the couch before he even registered his own movement, and was speaking before he even understood what he was truly saying.
"Why? Because you're constantly led on with your stupid one night stands?"
Throwing his hands up into the air in a form of defeat, Felix turned to him and rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Oh God- here comes the slut shaming. Everyone act surprised, the campus' resident bookworm is slut shaming again!!"
Now Minho's voice was growing louder, matching Felix' energy. But yet, he was still moving closer to him. And now that the younger male was shoving his arms through his jacket, Minho was already near the kitchen counter. "I didn't call you that, Felix. I'm just saying- don't act like it doesn't affect you when you and I both know that it does."
Pointing a finger at Minho, Felix shook it in a venous kind of way. Eyes narrowing into slits, he threw daggers Minho's way as the words slipped from his mouth in an icy tone. "You're just jealous because everyone else gets to fuck me but you don't."
"Don't put words in my mouth when you have no idea what you're talking about."
"But it's true, right?? It's why you stormed out of the party that night like a little baby throwing a tantrum. It why you got mad at me at the elevator and it's why you avoided me after the fact."
Minho could feel his heart race against his ribcage then, the fury building up inside of him. It coated his throat in a dry feeling, lighting up his veins and making his fists clench at his sides. "Don't act like you're the innocent one here when you're slutty ass was doing shit to make me jealous in the first place."
Felix threw another glare his way, his one a lot darker than the last and his eyes dancing with a murky tirade of emotions. However, at that moment, all Minho could pick out was blind fury and wrath. Much like how he assumed he looked.
Leaning his back against the front entryway's coat closet, Felix stared up at Minho with a dark stare. His gaze was drawing the older man in, until they were but a few steps away from each other in the small space there.
"Yeah and it worked, didn't it? You liked it." Felix started a sly kind of smirk spreading across his mouth. The kind that wasn't full of playfulness, but instead poison. "You're so fucking predictable, it's comical sometimes-"
"Just shut up already." Minho blurted out, running a frustrated hand through his hair as he stared Felix down. And against his better judgement, against all things he knew were right - he couldn't help but think about how pretty and perfect Felix looked just then... backed up against a wall, into a corner, peering up at him with a swarthy gaze and a firm line in his lips.
Fuck, he looked really hot.
"You can't tell me what to do." The way the words slipped from Felix's lips came out in a bratty kind of tone. "You're not the boss of me. I'm an adult now, I can do and say whatever the hell I want."
"If you don't shut up I'll literally-"
"Make me." Felix cut Minho off, raising a dark eyebrow his way.
"What?" Minho asked incredulously, now only a hands-reach away from Felix who was still pressed up against the closet's door. Still holding his bag in one hand and dressed in his coat.
"I said, make me. If you want me to shut up so badly then-"
Felix's bratty tone, and the way he was glaring up at Minho with his arms folded, was the last straw to break the camel's back.
Pointing a finger towards the door, Minho tilted his head towards it. "Get the fuck out. Right now."
His words seemed to startle Felix out of his stupor of anger, his focus breaking and his eyes melting a little bit. But then the frown was returning and he was once again glaring at him. "And what are you gonna do, force me?"
"No, I'll just tell Chris."
Felix scoffed incredulously which was quickly followed by a dry, mirthless laugh. "You act like us hanging out in a grave sin to humanity."
"To Chris, it would be."
"You don't even know him like that- you have no idea what you're talking about."
With that, Minho strode over to the door, unlocking the deadbolt and grabbing ahold of the handle. "And yet... you guys haven't had a sit-down conversation in over four years. Funny, but I think I know him a little better these days than you, Lixie." Minho drawled on in a low voice it was just barely above a whisper. He was taunting the younger man with the endearing nickname, saying it with as little emotion as he could muster.
"You being seen with me isn't a fucking crime." Felix seethed, and Minho watched as his knuckles turned white from holding onto his bag a little too hard. And yet, he neared the door. Walked into Minho's space and stepped through the threshold as he opened it.
Then Felix was completely out of the dorm, peering up at Minho with dark, slitted eyes and thinly-pressed lips. Leaning against the doorframe, Minho looked Felix up and down with a slow gaze.
"Try to tell that society when they find out an adult fucked a child."
"And then society will lose their minds when they find out the 'adult' was only eighteen and the child who fucking wanted it was a teenager."
Running a frustrated hand through his hair, Minho caught Felix's eyes. Their gazes held there for a few seconds, in the delicate limbo they were perched on - not quite saying what they meant, but instead speaking in twisting words and lies.
Grabbing ahold of the doorknob again, Minho began closing it. Shutting Felix out, once again. "A child never wants that kinda shit, Felix." He said, eyes flicking down to the bag on his shoulder. "Good luck with your project."
And then Minho was slamming the door in Felix's face, steadily locking it.
Then, he was pressing his back against the wood of the frame,
Sinking down, down, down,
Until he was sitting on the chilled tiled floor,
Head in his hands, dark locks yanked between his fingers,
Warm tears cascading down his chilled skin.
He had always been so, so fucking stupid.
Since the very beginning.
─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───
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‘✷’ : CHAPTER TWO “one joshua to rule them all”
<< prev chapter | ao3 fic | next chapter >>
chapter word count: 5.5k+
chapter warnings: swearing, alcohol
summary: "lately, seokmin had come to a realisation. joshua hong, seokmin thought, was a little bit of an enigma." - in which seokmin has known joshua for years, but he's always been a bit of a mystery to him. and as the days go by, he finds himself falling further and further for the enigmatic man, wanting to find out who the real Joshua Hong is behind his polite smiles and warm eyes and sweet words.
notes: if gods existed, i think they'd probably like to grant wishes purely to make humans suffer lmao
Seokmin ended up beginning to see a lot more of Joshua.
It was small things, really, but considering the fact that, up until then, Seokmin hadn’t even glimpsed a hint of Joshua’s shadow, it made him wonder if there were any gods up there, listening to his every word.
Because, well, he saw Joshua everywhere.
They bumped into each other while Seokmin was out grocery shopping, or while he was just getting off the bus and Joshua was getting on, or while Seokmin was popping into the gym to see if Soonyoung was escaping his dishwashing duties again (which was an utterly mortifying encounter that he really didn’t want to repeat), or simply while walking down the street as they accidentally made eye contact.
It was safe to say that he was seeing a lot of Joshua.
Soonyoung looked up from where he was spraying water on the cacti out in their hall, frowning when he saw Seokmin walk through the door, coming home after work.
“What’s up with you?” he asked, setting down the spray bottle. "Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost? And why are you late?”
Seokmin blinked, a rabbit under headlights. Soonyoung tilted his head, the concern melting into something more mischievous in his eyes.
“You did something, didn’t you? Seokmin, why’re you coming back from work late?”
“Uh, no reason,” Seokmin lied lamely, wincing internally. Damn. That hadn't even convinced himself. He made a mental note to get better at lying. “Nothing happened.” And then he ran to his room.
Or, tried to. Soonyoung had fast reflexes, even though he really only chose to use them whenever it most benefited him. Seokmin was often the poor victim of such reflexes, he thought. He made another mental note to get better at dodging Soonyoung's grabby hands.
"I can see it all over your face," Soonyoung said suspiciously. "What did you do this time?"
Seokmin tried to laugh casually. It didn't work. "Would you believe me if I said that absolutely nothing happened at all?"
"Nope."
"Aw, damn. I need to improve my skills of lying to you. Could we make that a daily session?"
"Seokmin, stop avoiding the question," Soonyoung said, shaking his shoulders. His eyes gleamed with the potential of getting embarrassing information out of him. "What did you do?"
Seokmin squirmed, unable to get out of Soonyoung's death grip on his arms.
"One of my students is leaving school today," he said finally. "She gave me these flowers to say thank you. But—"
"Oh! Let me guess, they're the ones you're allergic to?"
Seokmin glared at the interruption. "No."
"You touched them and they immediately died?"
"What? No!"
"There was a roach in them and you screamed and threw it in her face?"
"Huh? Hyung, that's what you did the last time your niece tried to give you flowers," Seokmin said. Soonyoung huffed, and then motioned for him to carry on with his head. He still had that death grip on Seokmin's arms.
"Just get on with it."
"I would if you stopped interrupting me," Seokmin sulked. "You're not letting me finish."
"So keep going!"
It was an incredibly embarrassing encounter, in fact. Seokmin had cherished the flowers, since they'd been given by one of his favourite students, and had happily carried them in his arms on the way home.
Only to turn the corner and run right into Joshua.
"Hello!" Joshua had said in surprise, steadying him with an arm on his shoulder. Then his voice had gone soft, that gentle softness which made Seokmin blink rapidly. "Those are some lovely flowers. Where did you get them?"
Seokmin had stared at him for a long, long moment.
“Seokmin?” Joshua’s voice had turned a little worried, removing his hand from his shoulder to wave it in front of his face. “Are you okay?”
Seokmin blinked at him again. And then—
"They're for you!" he'd blurted, for some reason.
Joshua froze. "What?"
"—and then I pushed the flowers into his arms and ran away," Seokmin finished miserably and Soonyoung cackled.
“You gave Joshua hyung flowers? That weren’t even for him?” Soonyoung said, still laughing. “Oh, wow. What did he say?”
“I don’t know,” Seokmin said, still in that same miserable tone. “I told you. I ran away.”
Soonyoung burst into laughter again, and Seokmin sighed.
If there were gods out there, listening to his wishes and orchestrating these embarrassing encounters, then Seokmin wasn’t sure he liked them that much.
His daily life carried on just like that, with a weird mix of constant Joshua-sightings and his normal, everyday routine. If Seokmin was being honest, it was getting kind of terrifying at this point, just how many times he’d seen Joshua over the past few weeks, when before he’d barely see the man outside of their monthly Game Nights.
It was mildly awkward, in the way that it would be mildly awkward to constantly see your friend’s undeniably attractive and weirdly elusive housemate even though you’ve held probably ten conversations in total with them. While the encounters weren’t necessarily unpleasant, he didn’t know what to do with the fact that his ears constantly reddened and his heart seized up and suddenly he didn’t know how to string two sentences together whenever he caught sight of Joshua’s big eyes and soft smile and shy wave of ‘hello’.
Seokmin was half-worried that he was being stalked, if Joshua didn’t look utterly surprised by their sudden, frequent encounters, just like him.
Well, Seokmin supposed, if the gods were indeed listening in on the lives of mere mortals like them, then this wasn’t exactly the worst wish of his that they could have chosen to grant. At least everyone around him wasn’t talking about Joshua 24/7, because boy would that be weird.
───────────── ‘✷,
Every time their favourite dongsaeng came over to talk to Soonyoung and Seokmin, it always had something to do with work.
Seungkwan always had something to complain over, or something to gossip about, or something to relay to his hyungs that would eventually devolve into him telling them how brilliant he was due to how he’d handled the situation. He was a master storyteller, better even than Jeonghan, and while he did get (justifiably) annoyed when Soonyoung and Seokmin interrupted him with constant questions, the way he told a story was almost unsettlingly gripping.
They dedicated entire evenings to these talk sessions, equipped with coffee and hot chocolate and a vast variety of unhealthy snacks, talking and laughing until the wee hours of the morning even though, most of the time, they had work the next day. But while sipping piping hot drinks with pop music blasting through the house and shitting on colleagues and discussing the meaning of life, no one had time to worry about work.
“Seohwa keeps saying that I look like a hamster,” Soonyoung said, squishing his cheeks and frowning, "and everyone keeps agreeing with her. Be honest you guys. Do I really?”
“Yeah,” Seokmin replied instantly, Seungkwan nodding in agreement with him. “You’re, like, the most hamster-looking person ever.”
Soonyoung took his hands away from his cheeks. “I hate you both.”
Seungkwan cackled, crawling through the mess of pillows strewn across the floor to kneel in front of Soonyoung, pinching his cheeks and moving his head around. “But hyung! Come on, you have to agree that you’re literally as adorable as the adorablest hamster in the world. You look just like the pet hamster my cousin used to have. Hey! Don’t bite me, you animal!”
Soonyoung just grinned as Seungkwan ripped his hands away from the elder’s face, shrugging as if he hadn’t just clasped his teeth around Seungkwan’s thumb. “Don’t put your hands next to my face.”
“What happened to your cousin’s hamster?” Seokmin asked, turning Seungkwan’s glare away from Soonyoung. “I didn’t even know she had one.”
“Oh, it died,” Seungkwan said. “Overfeeding.”
Soonyoung, taking a sip of his now-cold hot chocolate, choked.
“It was really sad,” Seungkwan carried on thoughtfully, patting Soonyoung’s back as he coughed. “It was so cute. It used to hoard food in its mouth like this—" He puffed out his cheeks— "with literally the exact same expression that Soonyoung hyung has when he's stuffing his face with food."
Soonyoung glared. "You're literally the worst person in the world. I'm banning you from coming back here."
"You wouldn't," Seungkwan said cheerfully, while Soonyoung rolled his eyes and Seokmin laughed, because they all knew that Seungkwan was right. And besides, even if they did ban him, he'd probably pick their locks and stroll into their apartment anyway.
"Hyung, can you get me more hot chocolate? I ran out," Seokmin asked, waving his empty mug at Soonyoung.
"Oh, hyung, me too!" Seungkwan said, holding his out too. "Make me some more too."
"No hot chocolate for traitors," Soonyoung snipped, but he stood up anyway, taking their mugs. "I hate you both so much."
Seokmin grinned, blowing a dramatic kiss in Soonyoung's direction as he attempted to navigate through the fluffy pillows and blankets that they'd flung across the floor of the living room. Soonyoung gave him the finger in return, and Seungkwan laughed.
"Kwan. Are you still going church-hopping tomorrow?" Seokmin asked, once there was the sound of the microwave whirring as Soonyoung heated the milk.
Seungkwan brightened, leaping at the chance to talk about his work. "Yeah, we are! We're going out of the area tomorrow, and we'll probably go there again the day after because the writers said that they won't have finished finalising the script until at least the end of this week. Ayun noona thinks they're slacking off, which is why it's taking so long."
Seokmin laughed. "Ayun noona thinks terribly of everyone."
"She does, doesn't she? Such a bitch," Seungkwan said, with feeling, and it made Seokmin laugh again as the younger scrunched his nose. "Did I tell you that thing she did the other day? We were in one of the churches in this area, and everyone was in a good mood because, you know, it was a nice day! The sun was out, we were technically getting a day off because who the fuck even does research on research trips, and Hyuwon had paid for literally everyone's lunch. We're on our way to the next church, but this noona just…"
And so the evening carried on. Soonyoung came back with the hot chocolate while Seungkwan was in the middle of his rant and almost spilled the drink all over the television to avoid Seungkwan's flailing hands. There was a scuffle, and melodramatic yelling, but eventually they settled down and Seungkwan carried on telling his story like nothing had happened.
It was chaotic. It was confusing. But it was, above all, normal, and Seokmin's head was buzzing with just how wonderfully, messily ordinary it was. As he laughed at Soonyoung for being slapped on the shoulder for interrupting Seungkwan's story, all he could think of was how good it was to have this day, this evening of ordinary stuff with no Joshua-ness. After all, it was probably the first day since last month's Game Night that he hasn't been reminded of Joshua, either because of his own brain or because he'd been seeing the man across the street at every turn.
Not that he didn't want to see Joshua, of course. But he didn't exactly want to deal with the weird heart palpitations and strange tongue-tiedness every single day, you know?
This evening was simply a good distraction from how startlingly suddenly Joshua had invaded his life.
“—and that choir that Joshua hyung leads was there too! His children were really really good, and it was all stuffy church hymns that they were singing, but that’s expected, since we were researching church stuff, but it was really amazing. Joshua hyung is a great teacher to the kids.”
Seokmin blinked at Seungkwan, astounded.
Great.
He spoke too soon.
Seungkwan kept rambling about his church-hopping events that had happened with his music theatre crew, because apparently they were gathering ‘hands-on’ experience to help with their new upcoming project, or something. Seokmin wasn’t sure how that worked, but they were doing it anyway, and Seungkwan carried on talking about it, his ramblings mostly on Joshua for the moment. Soonyoung was nodding along, practically drowning in a pile of cushions he’d made but still engaging in the conversation all the same.
Seokmin wanted to bash his head against the coffee table and knock himself out. This was insane. Joshua was everywhere, damnit.
When Seokmin said he wanted to see more of Joshua, he didn’t mean he wanted to see him and hear of him 24/7.
“—and I just think it’s so cool he does his day job and still leads the choir of the church, you know? Although, from what Jeonghan hyung said, he’s gonna quit his day job soon and do something else,” Seungkwan was saying. He was still talking about Joshua. How was he still talking about Joshua?
“What’s he gonna do?” Soonyoung asked.
“Work at a school as a music teacher,” Seungkwan replied. “Jeonghan hyung said he was growing tired of his desk job, so he’s doing something he enjoys. Good on him,” he added, “because from the way he worked with the church kids, he really, really loves teaching music.”
That made Seokmin smile, just a little bit. The image of Joshua giving a bunch of little kids his lovely, lovely smiles and clapping good-humouredly as they finished singing made his heart warm.
“Speaking of Joshua hyung, though,” Soonyoung said, and there was a distinctly sly lilt to his voice as he grinned at Seokmin. "Wanna tell Seungkwan what you did?"
Seokmin groaned. "No, actually, I don't."
"What? What? Hyung, what did you do?" Instantly, Seungkwan turned to him, fully intent on dragging the whole story out of him, patting his arm excitedly. "Hyung, tell me, please! I wanna know!"
"It's nothing interesting?" Seokmin tried. "You're not gonna wanna know?"
Soonyoung snorted at the way Seokmin's words had ended with a questioning lilt. Seungkwan just shook his head, eyes wide.
"Of course I want to know!" he insisted. He'd have looked so innocent and sincere if Seokmin didn’t know that he was fully intending to laugh at him once he'd told the tale. "I wanna know everything that my lovely Seokmin hyung gets up to, you know?"
Seokmin cringed. "Okay, okay, I'll tell you. It's really not that interesting."
And so, he relayed the same embarrassing story that he'd told Soonyoung, finishing in the same flustered, miserable tone.
"—pushed the flowers in his direction and ran away," he said, miserably, and Seungkwan burst into laughter. Seokmin crossed his arms, bottom lip jutting out. He had the worst friends ever.
“That’s so—” Seungkwan couldn’t even finish his sentence before dissolving into laughter again, holding onto an uncontrollably giggling Soonyoung for support. “Oh, Seokmin hyung, what are we gonna do with you?”
Seokmin sniffed. “You know what, I agree with Soonyoung hyung’s decision. Seungkwan, you’re banned from coming back here. Ever.”
“You wouldn’t,” Seungkwan said again, through tears of laughter, and he was right, again, but Seokmin huffed and pretended to be mad at him all the same. “You love me too much.”
“Debatable,” Seokmin said, but before Seungkwan could squawk in indignation, he pushed the younger’s mug of hot chocolate back into his hands. “Shh. Drink. Let’s talk about something else, I’m bored.”
“Okay.” Soonyoung opened a bag of chips, chomping thoughtfully. “Wait, Seok, it sounds like a lot of your students are leaving lately.”
Seokmin brightened at the change in topic and then saddened with a sigh. “Yeah, they are. So are the teachers! Everyone’s leaving all of a sudden, and it makes me sad.”
“Teachers too?” Seungkwan asked, putting down his mug again, eyeing Soonyoung’s bag of chips. “Is it one specific department they’re all leaving from?”
Seokmin tapped his lips thoughtfully, thinking through the colleagues who’d told him he was leaving soon. “I dunno. These two guys from the music department are leaving together to create a company, though.”
Seungkwan was still side-eyeing Soonyoung’s the bag of chips, sitting back on his knees. “Huh. Hey, I wonder what kind of company they’re trying to create.” He leaned forward suddenly, managing to snag the entire bag out of Soonyoung’s hands.
Immediately, Soonyoung gave a cry of outrage and lunged towards Seungkwan, arms outstretched while the younger rolled around and adamantly yelled “No! No!” while trying to keep the chips out of Soonyoung’s reach.
“I think it was a company on mental health or something” Seokmin said, half to himself, half to his friends wrestling amongst the fluffy blankets. “I can’t remember what it was about. Oh, and there’s another guy who’s leaving ‘cuz he's retiring, I think.”
Amidst a spray of chip crumbs, Soonyoung emerged victorious, sticking his tongue out incredibly maturely at the static-haired Seungkwan.
“What department was he? Dance history?” he asked, while Seungkwan sat up and tried in vain to calm down his hair.
Seokmin shook his head. “Nope, he taught chemistry. No one teaches dance history at a normal school, hyung,” he pointed out.
“Hey, your school isn't normal. It's fancy as fuck,” Seungkwan said, giving up on his hair and glaring at Soonyoung. “It’s a fucking private school. You have stables. You might very well have dance history lessons too.”
“Well, we don’t,” Seokmin said. “Our music department is pretty big, though. Well, we’re down two now, but there’s still a lot of teachers there. We have an organ tutor and everything.”
Seungkwan threw his hands up in the air while Soonyoung shook his head, and Seokmin blinked.
“What?”
“An organ tutor,” Seungkwan emphasised.
Seokmin thought about it. Shrugged. “Okay yeah, it’s a bit weird.”
“A bit weird,” Soonyoung repeated, grinning. “Oh, dear Seokmin, I have no idea how you managed to get into that school at all.”
“Honestly,” Seokmin said, “Me neither.”
Instantly, Soonyoung cuffed him around the head with a pillow. “Hey, don’t say that about yourself! You are brilliant, Lee Seokmin! You deserve the highest salary ever and for none of your children to hand in half-assed essays for the entirety of your career!”
Seokmin blinked, confused, opening his mouth to protest and receiving a mouthful of cushion in return. “Wh—I was agreeing with you!”
“It was a trick question!” Seungkwan crowed, before his head swung back suddenly as Seokmin threw a cushion in his direction. He fixed his eyes on Seokmin, a dangerous glint appearing in his eyes. “Oh, you are so dead for that.”
Any attempts to carry on the conversation were lost beneath flying upholstery and shrieks of laughter and the sound of the three of them cheering while murdering one another with pillows.
───────────── ‘✷,
Someone had decided to bring a bluetooth speaker to their latest Game Night, and Seokmin didn’t know whether he should be congratulating the person or fantasising about wringing their neck.
“Soonyoung, fucking turn down that music before I smash that speaker to bits!” Jihoon yelled over the cacophony of noise, making Mingyu jump from where he was standing in the middle of the room, acting out whatever charade he was meant to try and get them to guess.
“Never!” Soonyoung yelled back, almost tripping over Junhui’s legs to run towards his precious speaker, hugging it as if protecting it from the various profanities that Jihoon was yelling at it.
Minghao rolled his eyes from where he was squished next to Seokmin on the sofa, stuck so close to his side that they were practically sitting in each other’s laps. “If Jihoon hyung doesn’t smash it, then I might,” he muttered, and Seokmin grinned.
“You and those spindly arms?” he said, poking Minghao in the side.
Minghao scowled. “Shut up.”
The music was lowered, eventually, and Mingyu went back to acting out what looked like a rabbit hanging from a branch and dying a painful death.
“I don’t get it,” Jeonghan said eventually, and several voices yelled out their agreement. “Should we play something else?”
“No, guys, this one is really easy,” Mingyu insisted. “Come on, I’m acting out one of you guys.” He did the action again, and the rabbit scrunched its nose and seemed to almost succeed at lifting itself up onto the branch before it fell back down again. “Do you really not get it?”
“Just tell us,” Seokmin yelled out. “No one gets it.”
Mingyu huffed. “It’s Seungcheol trying to do his first pull-ups back when we were in uni.”
Immediately, there was an explosion of noise as Seungcheol cried out at the injustice of the horribly inaccurate depiction while Chan screamed with laughter and various others yelled in recognition. Seokmin laughed, sipping from his mug, marvelling at how quickly Game Night was once again veering away from its main aim of, well, playing games.
Minghao was curled up at his side, drinking water out of a wine glass, and wasn’t it really weird that Seokmin was drinking alcohol in a mug and Minghao was drinking water in a glass?
He pointed this out to Minghao, but the man just shrugged. “Jeonghan never does anything that makes sense. It’s no wonder that the cups he’s assigned to us don’t make sense either.”
Seokmin laughed, draining his mug and stretching out on the sofa, which had rapidly emptied as everyone jumped up to yell at each other. “You’re so right.”
Overall, this month’s Game Night was going really well. They’d already almost murdered each other during five rounds of Uno, one weird round of Chinese Whispers and three of charades, and Seokmin’s brain was entering that floaty state where he felt all loose and happy and everything made him laugh.
And he was, most definitely, not avoiding Joshua.
He wasn't, okay, he really wasn’t. He didn’t even talk to Joshua normally, so it was totally ordinary for them not to interact once during Game Night. Even if he was Jeonghan’s housemate, it wasn’t like Seokmin was best friends with him too. And that wasn’t something that was going to start now, right? So it was totally normal.
It was also totally normal for Seokmin’s eyes to keep drifting to him, of course.
Soonyoung suddenly launched himself into the gap between Minghao and Seokmin, making Seokmin yelp and Minghao hiss. Except, he bounded up to them with too much force, so Soonyoung simply bounced into their laps before sliding off again.
“W—Soonyoung, get off!” Minghao looked down at the man on the floor, who was giggling on the floor and evidently drunk off his ass. “What’s wrong with you now?”
Seokmin tilted his head, poking Soonyoung in the cheek with his foot. The elder didn’t even react, only giggling harder, and Seokmin grinned. “Everything. Hyung’s wasted.”
Minghao wrinkled his nose, tsking. “Already? It’s not even midnight yet.” He stood up from the sofa, stepping over Soonyoung’s body. “I’m gonna go find Junhui,” he said to Seokmin, motioning to the mess that had spread out from the living room and into the hall. “Make sure he’s not puking all over himself again.”
Seokmin gave him a salute. “Good luck, soldier.”
No sooner had Minghao vacated the sofa than Jeonghan flopped down into the space next to Seokmin, leaning into his shoulder and waving down at Soonyoung on the floor at their feet.
“Hi, Soonyoung,” Jeonghan grinned. “How’s the floor?”
Soonyoung muttered something.
“Cool,” Jeonghan said, before whipping his attention round to Seokmin. “Have you seen Jihoon?”
“Uh,” Seokmin blinked, startled by the sudden question. “No?”
Jeonghan sighed, slumping into him again. “Shame. I’m looking for Joshua. I dunno where he’s gone. It’s like he’s disappeared into thin air.”
Seokmin tilted his head, thoroughly confused, because Joshua was standing in the other corner of the living room, looking like he was consoling a teary Seungkwan while trying to hold back his own laughter. He was nowhere near Jihoon. And he was right within their range of vision.
“Are you drunk?” he asked Jeonghan, and the elder threw his head back and laughed.
“Me? No way,” Jeonghan said, grinning, sitting up properly. “You, Minnie, aren’t nearly drunk enough, however. Here.”
And he pushed another mug of alcohol into Seokmin’s hands that he’d seemingly procured out of nowhere, watching him like a hawk until he took a sip. Jeonghan smiled, satisfied, drinking from his own mug as he leaned back into the couch, watching the chaos of the room.
“Joshua hyung’s right there,” Seokmin pointed out helpfully, just in case Jeonghan hadn’t seen him. He wasn’t sure how Jeonghan hadn’t, though, because Seungkwan was making loud wailing noises and Joshua was standing next to him, shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter.
“Right where?” Jeonghan asked, but it was a little absentminded, as if he’d stopped looking for Joshua. “You should make friends with him, you know.”
Seokmin blinked. “I—what?”
“Make friends,” Jeonghan said. “With Joshua.”
Seokmin squinted at him. “I think you are drunk, hyung.”
Jeonghan just laughed. “Maybe. But you should. Just talk to him, you know? I think you’d get on really well. You’ve probably already seen how he’s so much like you.”
“He is?” Seokmin furrowed his brow. At his feet, Soonyoung was wriggling around, trying to sit up. “How do you know that? I don’t know anything about him.”
“Sure you do,” Soonyoung murmured, headbutting Seokmin’s knee. “Like how hyung makes weird design choices.”
Seokmin blinked as Soonyoung dragged himself to his feet, frowning like he was in deep thought before sitting in Seokmin’s lap. “Ugh, get off, you’re heavy. How could you even hear us from down on the floor? Above all this noise?”
“You’re loud,” Soonyoung said, grinning and adjusting himself in Seokmin’s lap. “And comfy. Why are you so comfy?”
Seokmin yelped when Soonyoung kneed him in the crotch. “Ow! What the hell? Jeonghan hyung, help me!” He turned to his side only to find that Jeonghan disappeared. Probably fucked off once he knew that Seokmin would be calling for his help, Seokmin thought grumpily. “Hey, stop wriggling, will you? You’re gonna make me spill beer all over you.”
“Never,” Soonyoung declared, clinging to Seokmin’s shoulders. “I’m never leaving. It’s so comfy here.”
Seokmin looked around exasperatedly, trying to find an escape, before his eyes lit up. “Hey! Hyung, Minghao’s gonna attack your speakers with a baseball bat!”
“He’s gonna do what?” And instantly, Soonyoung leapt off of Seokmin, allowing him to breathe again.
There was the distant sound of yelling and Soonyoung wailing about his speaker, and Seokmin simply laughed as an empty-handed Minghao walked back in the living room only to be tackled to the ground by Soonyoung. Junhui walked into the room a few seconds after and promptly tripped over them, and Seokmin laughed even harder.
“Hello.”
The soft voice in Seokmin’s ear made him jump, and his eyes widened as he turned around to see Joshua sitting next to him on the sofa. The elder nodded his head to the living room doorway, where the impromptu rugby pile had turned into all of them somehow lying face-down on the floor.
“I love the chaos you’ve caused there.”
“You heard what I said to Soonyoung?” Seokmin asked, surprised. Joshua laughed, shaking his head.
“No. But I guessed.” Joshua paused, eyes flitting to Seokmin, eyes warm and yet also tinted with something unfamiliar. “He was all over your lap, after all. It was difficult not to notice.”
“Oh.” Seokmin blinked. Somewhere, someone let out a squawk.
Joshua didn’t say anything, giving a small smile, leaning back into the cushions. He was drinking water, Seokmin noticed. Out of a plastic cup with Winnie the Pooh’s face on it.
Did Joshua ever actually drink at these events?
Seokmin surveyed the room once again, and Junhui was meowing like a cat for some reason and Seungcheol was trying to bodily lift Jihoon off from where he’d been clung to Seungkwan for some reason or other. But he wasn’t really seeing any of it, more focused on Joshua by his side, all silent and thoughtful, the elder’s words ringing in his ears.
“We aren’t like that,” Seokmin suddenly blurted out. “Soonyoung hyung and I. He’s just. Clingy. With everyone.”
Joshua looked over at him, and when he smiled over the rim of his cup at him, there was a little twinkle in his irises, all bright and gentle and sweet. “It’s okay. I know.”
“You know?”
“Yeah.” Joshua’s eyes crinkled. “I know.”
That made Seokmin feel strangely glad.
After a few moments, he nodded to Joshua’s cup. “Not drinking again this time?” he asked.
“Hm? Oh, not tonight,” Joshua said, sipping his water again. “Alcohol always tastes too bitter in my mouth.”
“I get you,” Seokmin said, nodding in understanding. “Way too bitter.” Then he tipped his head back and drained his mug.
Joshua looked over at him and laughed.
Silence descended on them again, but it was a companionable silence. Like it was totally okay for them to inhabit the same space as each other without words having to be exchanged.
It was by no means quiet in the room, not with the inevitable shouting that came with monthly Game Night, but it was… nice. It was kind of nice to sit still with Joshua, Seokmin thought.
“I think you’d get on really well.”
Seokmin frowned thoughtfully, glancing over at Joshua again. The elder caught his eye, and simply raised his eyebrows at the eye contact, a silent question. It had Seokmin shaking his head with a smile before facing forward again.
Jeonghan had known Joshua for years. He’d known Seokmin for years, too. So of course he’d be someone who could tell whether two of his best friends would be able to get along.
“You’ve probably already seen how he’s so much like you.”
But, well. Seokmin hadn’t. And that was the weirdest thing about all of this.
Seokmin might not have known Joshua the longest, but he had known him for long enough. Long enough to probably know at least a few embarrassing or personal stories about him. But, no matter what Joshua said, no matter what Jeonghan said, no matter what anyone said, Seokmin had to say that he didn’t think he knew all that much about him.
But he should at least know some things about Joshua. Right?
Seokmin looked over at Joshua, who was sipping water from that plastic Winnie the Pooh cup, eyes sparkling as he watched Junhui waving his hands while telling the others something. He squinted his eyes, trying to properly scrutinise his hyung, trying to think about what he knew about him.
But Seokmin. Seokmin had to admit he was definitely more than a little drunk, and he had Hansol’s seagull-squawk laugh in his ears, and Jeonghan’s house was always so warm and comforting and it made his already creaky brain practically come to a full stop.
So as Seokmin looked at Joshua’s side profile, all he could think about was the delicate slope of Joshua’s nose, the way his cheeks were flushed due to the warmth of thirteen people squished in one room, the way his eyes crinkled so prettily, the way his laugh sounded like music, the way—
“I think I’m going to go to my room,” Joshua said, and suddenly he was all up in Seokmin’s personal space, lips close to his ear so he could hear him properly. He smelled soft, Seokmin thought faintly. Whatever that meant. “It’s too noisy.”
“R—ight,” Seokmin said, and suddenly he felt like he could feel his pulse pounding in his wrists. His brain was basically nonexistent now, and his tongue felt sticky, bitter alcohol all around his mouth. “Um, rest well, hyung.”
Joshua smiled at him, and it was his soft-cotton smile that made Seokmin’s dizzy head feel a little more grounded. He stood up from the sofa, making his way across the crowded living room and attempting to leave. Seokmin found himself watching him, watching as Joshua was accosted by a mildly tipsy Seungcheol, watching as Joshua smiled teasingly and warmly in a honey-golden kind of way which seemed to satisfy Seungcheol enough to let him go.
Hm.
Seokmin wouldn’t deny that he was just a little bit mesmerised, not just because Joshua’s smile was so pretty, but because he’d smiled… differently. Like he knew exactly how to deal with both Seokmin and Seungcheol, navigating those situations effortlessly.
But what was Joshua like? What was he truly like? Seokmin wasn’t sure he had a clue. Perhaps Joshua smiled softly to him and warmly to Seungcheol and gazed at Jeonghan fondly, but what was Joshua’s real self? How was he when he wasn’t laughing at Soonyoung’s stories or crying over Seungkwan’s skits or making awkwardly endearing mistakes that feel almost like he’d thought them through before he’d enacted them?
Surely there was one true Joshua there. One Joshua that was more Joshua than all the other ones, the Joshua who he was on the inside.
The real Joshua.
But Seokmin didn't think he'd ever seen the real Joshua before. He didn't know who Joshua really was. He’d never thought about it until then, but now he had, and he realised that he really didn’t know.
Joshua didn’t look back as he walked out of the living room and up the stairs, but Seokmin watched him all the same, mind buzzing with alcohol and fuzzy cotton and smiling warmth.
For the rest of the night, Joshua was all that Seokmin could think about.
taglist (interact here/send ask to be added): @fairyhaos @atinytinaa @my-moarmy-heart @weird-life-of-a-closet-fangirl @lilsafsafbooyah @stqrrgirle @bittersweet-folder @weird-bookworm @ultrara-re @tianakings @bangantokchy @ahuihoeeee @tiinkerbell
#diorkyeom ᰔ fics#svt#seventeen#dokyeom#joshua#seoksoo#svt fanfic#svt fic#seventeen fic#seventeen fanfic#svt fluff#svt dokyeom#svt joshua#dokyeom fic#dk#joshua fic#joshua fluff#dokyeom fluff#svt seokmin#joshua hong#lee seokmin#seventeen x reader#svt imagines#ao3#fanfic#ao3 writer
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SAGAU! concept part 2
As i promised, i'll talk about the sibling's role and for starter, you can see my concept here
The Creator: Moon
"The Goddess who watches the sin any living beings have occurred and no matter who they are, they will experienced the same weight of punishment as their sins"
"The Goddess who helps the better for life that had been created, guiding at all aspects for the better of future"
So the Creator: Moon got a few jobs to do
Serves judgement upon everyone of Teyvat, especially the gods and immortals (because human and mortals could be taken care by the goverment system on Teyvat, ex : the knights of Favoniois, Matras, etc etc)
Building up mechanics for daily life (Basically anything that our world has, you'll recreate it, ex : dishwasher, microwave, sun panel etc etc.)
Building mechanics to war, defense, something that out of daily life (Guns ig, a whole rocket, nuclear, motorcycle and i'm imagining it like Bronya's bike etc etc)
Literally exist to keep the balance of the world, and following the Creator: Sun's order, of course with a personal judgement you can declined it or accept it
For simple, you work like a Matra, its just a little more poof and brak out there
.
.
The Creator: Sun
"The Goddess who create the Teyvat, fills it with happiness and luck, all for the better of life. He keeps all the memories for Teyvat to cherish and with his hands, any bless could be given"
"The Goddess who bring joyous light and many victories just for the mere living being created by him"
Here's a few jobs you'd do if you're the Creator : sun
Supervising the Teyvat's work (watching tianquan's work, grandmaster's, archons and many more)
The one who keep checking up irminsul along with Nahida, and the one who's taking care the ley line's work
Listening to the shrine visitors and grant their wish, but before that, the wish will be grant after passing the judgement and access from the creator : moon's judgement, in order to check the purpose of their wish and their background information
Blessing the certain nation on every important festival you attend
The one who's responsible to form a thousands of tactics and war formation if Teyvat needed
Etc etc
[ ! ] You can request a scenario using any creator, doesn't have to be the creator : Moon
[ ! ] i have a basic limits like for example pedophile action, anything that includes religion (i dont want to cause any mess] etc etc
[ ! ] You can dm or say it in the comments
#genshin fanfic#genshin impact#genshin masterlist#genshin scenario#genshin imagines#genshin headcanons#genshin cult#genshin impact headcanons#genshin impact imagines#genshin x reader#sei's page#genshin cult au#genshin sagau#genshin impact smut#genshin x you#self aware genshin
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we had a tough night on the heels of a very long day 😵💫 he slept 11-7 instead of his usual 7-7 and is going to have a disrupted nap schedule today so I am just preparing myself for a possible plane meltdown. I also slept horribly because for some reason I was super wired after his nighttime shrieking episode. but we will weather it! trying hard things builds confidence in our ability to handle them! it will be okay and if it’s not it’s only four hours of my life plus three-ish hours of transit + buffer time at the airport!
no students today thank GOD but lots to do. here we go here’s the day:
6:30-8:30 morning routine with baby
8:30-9:30 big burst of packing
9:30-10:30 I am so exhausted I think I just need to collapse in bed and rest for a bit
10:30 wake up baby if he’s not already up and get him dressed
10:50-11:30 drop dogs off at rover (bring food and collapsed wire crate!!!)
11:30-12 feed baby then start the dishwasher immediately!!!! gotta get bottles clean
12-2 shower/get ready, finish packing, and prep bottles for flight. try to get him to nap!!
2-2:45 pick up mail from post office
2:45ish leave for train (BRING ID!!!!!!! AND CAR SEAT BAG!!!! AND CARRIER!!!!!!!!)
before I get on: make sure I have ID, car seat bag, carrier, bottles
3-5 train and buffer time (feed him on the train so he’s happy)
5-6 meet my sister and go through security
6-10 flight… wish us luck 🤪
#daily processing#cannot express how tired I am#I need to find time to get this bloodwork done for I am struggling
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Hate this house so fuckin much man..
Just finished loading and started the damn dishwasher.
And bc my lil sis made cookies, she left the fucking mess for literally anyone else to clean up =_=
Mf didn't even leave the cookies out for anyone to try or eat. Gods, I wish I had fireball, cause I am pissed off and now, while I was initially planning to do smth about it tomorrow, I'm doing it tonight, cause I absolutely cannot take this shit anymore.
#random bullshit with milo#hate being the fucking 'maid' of the house for everyone#my older brother does fine and actually helps#its our younger siblings and parents that are the fucking problem#absolutely sick of this shit
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Easy As
A Carmen Berzatto Universe
Hey ya’ll. I’m so sorry I’ve been MIA. I’ve been going through some real shit in my personal life that’s been a big drain on me. Any feedback on this chapter is welcome - another request from my inbox!
Vanessa Monaghan is the breath of fresh air that Carmen had been gasping for.
Chapter 27: Tips
“Oh my God, I’m so excited,” Vanessa grinned, a wild look in her eyes as she fluffed her bangs in Carmy’s office, leaning down to check herself in the broken mirror perched on his desk.
“You’re the first person I’ve ever heard say they’re excited to be a server,” Carmy shook his head, grabbing his lucky pen to stick in her pocket.
The Bear was short employees – extremely short. A virus was running through the staff and Carmy exhausted all of his other options before picking up his cell to call Ness.
“Hi Baby how’s work?” She answered, he could hear the rustle of the wax paper he’d wrapped her a sandwich in before he left for work earlier that day.
“I need a favor, Ness,” he said, and she could practically see him running his hands through his hair. “How would you like to turn The Bear into a family business for the night?” He asked.
“What do you mean?” She asked through a mouthful of bread.
“Ricky and Ginny and Leo are all out sick,” he spoke of the serving staff that started after the renovation.
“Oh no,” she swallowed, “who’s going to serve tonight?” She asked, standing in front of the mirror over the kitchen sink, running a finger under her eye to swipe away a wisp of dried mascara.
“Tulo’s going to help,” he mentioned one of their on-again off-again dishwashers. “And maybe you?” He added.
“Me?” Vanessa’s brows shot up. “You want me to come in and help?” She asked.
“If you don’t mind, Ness,” Carmen sighed. “We’ve all called around people we’d trust but it’s a Saturday night…” he trailed.
��So you’d get to be my boss?” She asked with a small grin, already knowing she’d come in to help.
“Babe, I’m already the boss,” he countered, making her throw her head back with a laugh.
“Oh, you wish,” she giggled. “Of course I’ll come help,” she insisted, lifting a weight from her husband’s shoulders. “But baby I’ve never served before, I don’t know what to do,” she added, already walking back to the bedroom to freshen up.
“We’ll do a run through in the next hour,” he explained, “can you just get down here before four?” He asked.
“Changing now and I’ll hop in a car,” she said, stepping into the bathroom. “See you soon, boss.”
Carmen shook his head as he hung up. He was so grateful to have Vanessa on his team, and he was excited to see her a little longer tonight.
“Ness coming?” Syd asked, withholding her own sniffles. There simply wasn’t time for her to be feeling under the weather tonight.
Carmen nodded and Syd could also breathe a little easier.
“Run me the specials again,” Carmen said, tying up Vanessa’s blue apron at the small of her back.
“A little tighter, Carm, I’m trying to make some tips tonight,” she replied, earning an open-palm smack to her ass. She rattled off the night’s specials with a smile, looping her arms around Carmen’s neck. “And a cherry on top,” she finished, leaning forward to press her lips against his.
“No kissing the boss,” he said, eyes soft nonetheless.
“Baby, I am the boss,” she replied, giving him one more soft peck.
“Butt looks good,” he said, sliding his hand down over her curves. She’d donned a pair of fitted wide-leg trousers that generously showed off her nipped waist and round ass.
“You think I’m kidding about these tips?” She asked, “I called Nicola and she gave me some pointers, including the pants,” she laughed. Nicola was a waitress at a family restaurant in West Town through high school. “I might be new to serving, but I know how to work a room,” she winked.
And boy did Vanessa know how to work a room.
The kitchen was a well-oiled machine. At full strength, Carmen could easily focus on his tasks for the night. Even missing a few parts, they all knew what needed to be executed, but every time he could hear Vanessa’s gentle laugh and lilt, he found himself looking out toward the dining room.
He thought it was a total load of shit she’d never worked in the restaurant industry or as a server before. She floated in and out of the kitchen effortlessly – collecting dishes with a smile and taking in the chaos of the room without blinking. She took direction and listened as she received instructions, asking intentional questions and making sure to effectively and efficiently use her time.
Between the second and third rounds of seatings, she stole away to Carmen’s office, a cold diet coke in hand.
“Checking in,” Carmen poked his head into the office as well, seeing his wife sitting on his desk with her feet perched on his desk chair.
“Hi, baby,” she smiled, taking a sip of her drink.
“How are you doing?” He asked, stepping inside and closing the door behind him.
“Good,” she insisted with a nod. “Kinda wish I wore better shoes, but I’ll make it work, only two more rounds of reservations left,” she shrugged.
“Tulo is impressed,” Carmen said, wrapping her up in a hug, rubbing his hands up and down her back, feeling her melt into his chest. “We all are,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her cheek, just in front of her ear.
“It’s fun,” she said, eyes resting as he held her close. “I’m glad I can help,” she added, “plus, I’ve made eight hundred bucks tonight, so I’m going to be funding a whole spa day next week.” Carmen laughed, not surprised at all.
“Good plan,” he encouraged, “anything you need from me before next shift?” He asked.
“Just you,” she smiled, leaning back to look into his eyes.
“You already got me,” he reminded, flashing up his left hand where he was donning his black silicone ring. His gold band never came to the restaurant.
“Forever,” she grinned, squeezing a handful of his ass in her hand.
“I’ll tell HR,” he threatened as two loud knocks landed on the door.
“Five minutes!” Syd called.
“She’s the real boss,” Vanessa commented, Carmen nodding in agreement.
The third round of dinner went by quickly and Vanessa continued to impress both the staff and the customers. It wasn’t easy getting a reservation at The Bear these days and she knew that part of paying for the experience was exceptional service – she didn’t want to let Carmen or anyone else down.
On the last round of the night, and as some of the staff had moved to kitchen clean as dishes were finalized, Vanessa’s purview whittled down to three tables, an older couple at one, two newly divorced girlfriends at another, and a four top of corporate business bros.
“Now fellas,” Vanessa smiled as she approached the table, which had already rung up an $800 bill on alcohol alone. “I know I can’t send you out into the night without dessert,” she added. “I need you to try our pastry chef’s chocolate cake – it will ruin all other chocolate cake for you,” she insisted.
The closest to her, a blonde, who’d been eating up her presence all night grinned in a way that showed off each and every crown in his mouth.
“I think you might be the most delicious thing here,” he leaned back in his chair, confident from his several glasses of bourbon. “So if you’re saying it’s the best, I gotta take the recommendation.”
“Careful now,” Vanessa shook her head with a smirk, “my husband is a very jealous man, and he handles all the sharp knives back there,” she jammed her thumb over her shoulder. “But I’ll put in an order for four slices.”
And if she put a little extra swing in her step back to the kitchen – that was between her and God.
“Ness?” Carmen asked as he watched his wife push her cleavage up, tucking away any stray baby hairs that had escaped her ponytail from earlier.
“Tuition isn’t cheap, baby,” she replied, making Ebraheim howl with delight. A joke, of course, as her tuition was coming straight out of her trust fund – an exception made by her father who was all too thrilled that his daughter was going after an advanced degree. “Men are so easy,” she finished, smoothly stacking four plates of chocolate cake on her arms before heading back out to the dining room. Carmen looked over to Tina, who simply shrugged with a smile.
After the last reservation settled their bill, and the lowboys had been properly cleaned, Vanessa and Carmen made their way back to the train stop to head home – the evening quickly approaching midnight.
“Twelve-hundred dollars and two phone numbers,” Vanessa waved around her receipts, making Carmen laugh.
“I’m never asking you to fill in again,” he replied.
“Oh, I’ll go right to Syd,” she countered. “This was fun!”
“Thank you for helping out,” Carmen said, pulling her into his side as they picked the back corner of a nearly empty car.
“’Course, baby,” Vanessa smiled, “anything for you.”
“Anything?” Carmen asked.
“Yes, Chef.”
#Carmy#carrmy fluff#carmen x oc#carmy smut#Carmen Berzatto#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen Berzatto x oc#Carmen berzatto x ofc#the bear#the bear hulu#the bear fan fic#the bear fx#carmy the bear#Jeremy Allen White#jeremy allen white is HOT#ruin me jeremy allen white
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Sex and Death: Chapter 3, Food and Lodging
Masterlist link
Chapter 3: Food and Lodging
Settled on stools at the kitchen counter, they had their meal. Magnus hummed in contentment over his empty plates and stretched. The boy could certainly eat, Noura thought to herself.
It made sense. A 6'2 runner with the metabolism of a hummingbird must work up an appetite. In fact, they both made quick work of the spread before them, having forgotten to eat during their ceaseless work.
He spoke after a languid stretching yawn. “I have no idea what half of that was, but it was absolutely delicious. Thank you, Noura.”
“My pleasure. It's literally the least I can do.”
He chuckled, “It really isn't. You're too much of an overachiever to even understand what true laziness is. Let me teach you sometime. I'm an expert. You can repay me by feeding me all that extra food you make on a regular basis.” He winked. She melted.
“Bullshit, Magnus. I know you're far from lazy.”
“Well...only when I'm really interested in something. Luckily, with my job, there's always something interesting.”
Noura's smile suddenly fell, and she felt her stomach drop as she remembered her outburst. “I liked working with you...solving puzzles. I wish I could keep doing it, but I'm pretty sure I just burned my bridges pretty thoroughly. God, that was so stupid! Magnus, I've NEVER done that before. I have no idea what got into me.”
Magnus held her hand and the sudden proximity shocked her a bit. “Noura, you were amazing. You should be proud of the way you stood up for all of us. Everyone in that department wanted to say that for a very long time, I assure you. Especially me. I've been his punching bag for years. Whenever there's a database to tediously comb through, or dozens of garbage cans to dig in for a single letter, guess who gets the short end of that stick.”
She turned to face him. “Magnus, that's horrible! With your skills and education, how can they justify making you an errand boy?”
He gave her a sad little smile. “I'm flattered that you think so highly of me. I wish Kurt felt the same way,” he said, gathering the dishes and beginning to load the dishwasher.
She was pensively silent for a moment, weighing her words. “Can I ask you a personal question?”
“Shoot!” he said lightly, slinging the dishtowel over his shoulder.
“Why are you a cop, Magnus? You're incredibly bright...well-educated. There are so many careers you could excel at, with much bigger paychecks and less stress and more mental stimulation. What made you want to be a detective?”
He tilted his beautiful blond head and squinted his eyes in thought as he dried his hands. “I wanted to do something to help people. I love solving puzzles. I wanted to solve the ones that really counted. I wanted to protect people, or at least bring some sense of closure or justice to the families of the victims, if it was...you know...too late to protect them. I think, ultimately, I wanted purpose.”
She met his eyes across the counter and smiled sweetly, dark eyes full of a deep understanding he had never seen from anyone else before. “That's...well...beautiful, Magnus...beautiful and noble, and thoughtful.”
He released a breathy chuckle, blushing and looking at the floor, then said, “Great. Could you tell my mother that? She seems to think it was an idiotic move. I even told her how the badge makes me seem really cool but that wasn't enough to convince her it was a good choice.”
He waited while she laughed. He was now totally enamored with the sound and would loathe interrupting it. “Hey, would you mind if I took a shower and got ready for bed? I'm fading fast.”
“Oh...uh no! No not at all. Bathroom is all yours.”
“I'll be quick.”
“Take your time!” she said after him, wincing and wondering if that was an odd response. Noura tried not to think about how that gorgeous, sweet young man with the lithe body of a Greek god was about to be wet and naked in the other room. While he was out of the room she took the opportunity to put on her own pajamas. Digging through her closet she suddenly realized every piece of modest nightclothes she owned was cozy but looked stupid. She searched in vain for the least embarrassing set. Really? She thought, These are the least embarrassing I have? As she donned the Star Trek pajamas and sighed in resignation.
“Noura?” She heard Magnus call from the bathroom.
Oh god, she thought. Don't be weird, Noura.
“Yes?” she said tentatively, coming towards the bathroom.
She was dismayed when a very naked and damp Martinsson, wet curls dripping, opened the door a crack to speak.
Don't look down, she thought, For the love of god and all that is holy, do not fucking look down.
But to Noura's surprise, not looking down didn't help. He was standing with his back towards the mirror, directly in her line of sight, revealing the entire back of his body to her; broad shoulders, long strong legs, and a round firm ass all dripping and meeting her eyes directly, unavoidably.
“Sorry, but do you have a spare bath towel?” he said, snapping her back to reality.
“Yeah! Of course! I'm so sorry. Let me grab one.”
She hustled back to the closet, and was again on a quest for the least embarrassing thing she owned, only to settle on a terrycloth monstrosity with The Groke from Moomin sprawling across it.
Fuck. She thought, but hurried back nonetheless to deliver the towel.
He chuckled at the design and said “Thanks,” mercifully closing the door again before the sight of him made her lose her entire mind.
Taglist: @peacefulpianist @peaches1958 @icytrickster17 @sired-to-hybrid @mjsthrillernp @acidcasualties @loz-3 @annoyingsweetsstranger @alexakeyloveloki @marcotheflychair @muddyorbs @smolvenger @sweetsigyn @goblingirlsarah @lovelysizzlingbluebird
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