#god I just fucking love spore druids!!!!

[spiritsong]

rotten as kindness from the inside out, decay so gentle and softening out

SPORE DRUID // symbiotic entity // halo of spores

[irradiatedsnakes]

i need to know more about pennybun i have fallen deeply in love

PENNY MY BEST FRIEND PENNY!!!!

(by @/skypiea)

penny is my first tav and i love her. she's a white dragonborn circle of the spores druid. i finished her first playthrough a couple weeks back, and i've started on a second playthrough with her! slightly edited, and now that i understand more about the game and the story i'm refining her character and story. i missed a lot of stuff on that first playthrough!

pennybun's name comes from the mushroom, by the way. i'd decided on that before i knew that there was a mushroom-themed druid circle in this game, i was GOING to choose moon, but, like. it's perfect. penny buns aka porcini aka king bolete aka Boletus edulis are an edible mushroom that symbioses with the roots of pine trees. they're part of my research and they're quite adorable

she's from a circle of druids located in the shelterwood- a dense forest near baldur's gate. she grew up in the city proper- or at least, on the edges of it- before moving out to the woods to pursue life as a druid.

she's solidly good-aligned- as my first playthrough, her story is kind of the best-case-scenario for everything, savescumming the hell out of some fights (good god the last light fight with marcus). everybody gets their good ending, everybody gets saved, that kind of deal.

she had a generally good relationship with everyone in the party, but gale, wyll, and karlach are her best mates for sure. i missed out on romancing karlach the first go around, but we're doing it on penny's second save file. it's happening.

she's also quite close with shadowheart, especially after the events of act ii. her relationship with lae'zel is more tense.. but i'm still working on figuring out that exact trajectory- missing a lot of lae'zel's storyline was one of the biggest mistakes i made in the first go-around. she and astarion never get close, but there's not any malice there, either.

she's good friends with jaheira, the two get along like a house on fire, and she looks up to jaheira a lot. she didn't have a lot of time to get to know minsc and boo, but they were plenty friendly in the short time they crossed paths. halsin, i need to work on, i also kind of fucked up his stuff first go-around by neglecting to fix the shadowlands. to be updated when i reach act ii in Penny The Sequel.

overall, penny's a big ol goody-two-shoes. she wants to help as many people as she possibly can, and feels a massive weight on her shoulders because of it, having been thrust into this leadership role by apparent pure chance.

while i'm still working it out, the central theme of pennybun's story is trust, and who she puts it in. an early decision i made before knowing anything about the story was that penny trusts the Mysterious Dream Guardian completely and totally, which made for some EXTREMELY fun character moments later on- utilizing the tadpoles (her and gale both), becoming partial illithid, and eventually in act 3 losing her trust in and culminating with her turning on the emperor, plus her own ceremorphosis to wield the netherstones against the netherbrain.

gear-wise, she uses the default druid armor for most of the game, switching to the armor of the sporekeeper in act 3. she assembles the mourning frost in the underdark in act 1 and it remains her favored weapon for the rest of the game. she also wears the key of the ancients, and just before the start of the finale gains the nymph cloak.

other assorted Penny Facts:

she keeps a detailed log of every camp dinner the group has. good food is very important

she has a soft spot for parasites. part of why she was receptive to the idea of utilizing the tadpoles, and also part of why she lets astarion take a bite from time to time.

she got her eye poked out by volo

she has a -1 int modifier

she's a lot keener on necromancy than you might expect a druid to be. she views necromancy and the undead (for the most part) as a natural part of the cycle of life- after all, everything will eventually return to the dirt to be eaten by the fungi and the other decomposers, no matter how prolonged it is.

it is imperative that all her friends (karlach excluded for reason of cool hair) wear fun hats. ive posted about The Hat Tax before but everyone in the party gets a funny hat. it's so important.

she's my best friend and i love her

[sky-scribbles]

The Karlach/Gideon Nav comparisons have sunk deep into my brain at this point, so I think it's about time I laid out my Locked Tomb AU thoughts. Because there are some very fun necro & cavaliar pairings to find among the tadfools and their supporting cast:

For the Second House, we have an obvious cavalier: Lae'zel, trained for the frontlines since hatching, ready to march to war for her Emperor god-queen even if she doesn't know why. Her necromancer is harder to pin down - it could be Shadowheart for the Harrow and Gideon vibes, but I want to use Shadowheart elsewhere. Ghustil Sturnugoss could work, perhaps - until Lae'zel starts to see through the lies she's been raised on...

The Third House smacks of nobility and charm, so my gut says Wyll is our cavalier - yes, he's a spellcaster, but he's the Blade of Frontiers. He wields a rapier; he's Wyll, the protecor. He's asking to be a cavalier. As for his necromancer, the person he's bound to serve, to die for... well, I guess it has to be Mizora, who has plenty of Third charisma herself. Not all cavaliers serve willingly.

We have a much more stable duo for the Fourth: Isobel and Aylin! Isobel is a cleric, made for warding and guarding just like Isaac, and Aylin has a very Fourth House-esque tendency to, as Gideon put it 'charge in headfirst and get all crazy'.

The Fifth house are tricky. They're spirit-speakers, so Withers is the obvious choice, but who's his cavalier? An aged-up Arabella? But she feels more like a necromancer to me, so I landed on an alternative: put an actual spirit into the necromancer role, and make it Thaniel. And have his protector be Halsin, who could fill Magnus's surrogate dad role quite nicely. (Rumour has it that not only does Halsin the Fifth wield knuckle-knives, he carried two knuckles and has a tendency to chuck his rapier away and just slash at you like a bear.)

Gale 'which way to the nearest library?' Dekarios is just begging to be the necromancer of the Sixth House - he even has a House-esque surname, though we'd have to change it so he doesn't sound like he comes from some nonexistent Tenth House (Hekarios? Sextarios?) And if his cavalier is someone who'll remain at his side through thick and thin, protect him from the world and from himself... I guess I have no choice but to make Tara a tabaxi and give her a sword. She deserves it.

I confess to drawing a blank for a really fitting match for the Seventh, so for lack of a better place to put them, let's make it Jaheira and Minsc, since Minsc pretty much sees himself as her cavalier in canon anyway. I suppose if you spec Jaheira as a Spores druid, she does at least have the 'walking corpse' thing down.

The cavalier of the Eighth House is another forced into service: Astarion, serving his necromancer Cazador. He's been trained to be his necro's resource, not his equal; he exists for Cazador to draw on and suck dry. He owns nothing but his sword (and unlike Colum, he doesn't even have his honour; it was tortured out of him long ago.)

And finally, Shadowheart as the Ninth House necromancer - a young acolyte raised in an underground cloister among those who worship silence, darkness and loss; her own memory betraying her, loving her order despite the fact that it has broken her again and again. With her cavalier, Karlach, who just wants to get out of her indentured service already and to be given back her fucking longsword.

[let-me-sleep-or-die]

Avatar The last Airbender characters As dnd classes because why not

Toph: path of the storm Herald Barbarian  Storm herald barbarians change the environment around them as part of their fighting and I thought the rock armor thing she does would be fun as her rage mechanic. 

Aang: wild magic sorcerer/way of the astral self monk multi class. 

Wild magic because most is the show he can’t control the avatar state or a lot of his bending forms so it will sorta just burst out of him, and way of the Astral self monk because the fighting style is so him. 

Katara: Circle of spores Druid.

Circle of spores Focuses on the elements and healing, I originally thought about having her be a cleric but she’s got no real connection to a deity she would worship throughout the show so Druid made the most sense.

Sokka: battle master fighter. Has a few levels in artificer. 

HES THE PLAN GUY! God this makes so much sense to me, his whole thing is that he makes good plans and basically helps people giving direction through battle, battle master makes so much sense for him. 

Artificer because he is also shown to be an inventor a few times throughout the show. 

Zuko: starts as Oath of Conquest switches to oath of redemption paladin in season 3. 

I knew Zuko was gonna be an oath of redemption paladin and at first I thought that was him through the whole show but he doesn’t actually try to truly redeem himself until season 3, so that’s when he would switch his subclass (I fucking love when people switch class/ subclasses mid way through a campaign.) Oath of conquest is all about glory and subjugation which is what he really wants hiding it under the guise of redeeming his honor for the first two seasons. Oath of redemption paladins have calm emotions which he definitely used during each of his  one in one field trips with the gang   

Suki:  way of the open hand monk 

Suki’s whole fighting style is very much just dnd monks, this is like the basic monk subclass but I honestly think it fits her super well plus the tranquility thing Way of the open hand gets at 11th level really reminds me of this scene from her graphic novel. 

Azula: The Fiend warlock. 

I knew Azula was some kind of warlock because her father is obviously her patron. The Fiend is very much fire flavored plus they literally gain hit points when defeating an enemy which feels very Azula. 

Tai lee: ALSO WAY OF THE OPEN HAND! 

Her fighting style is very way of the open hand but I’m a different way than Suki’s is, but I think that just goes to show you can play the same subclass very differently I think it fits them both super well. Tai lee fits into the whole fury of blows thing really well. 

Mai: assassin rogue. 

Assassin rogues can hide in darkness hit quick and hard and disappear, it fits her, at level 17 they get a death strike mechanics that feels very similar to her knife things she throws. (Plus daggers are a stereotypical rogue weapon so-) 

Anyways please tell me what you think or if you’ve got classes for other characters or other classes you’re like use for these guys! 

[needle-noggins]

Tell me about your OCs, Sav

And I mean all of them. Or else.

13, 28, 31, A, H

AAAAAH okay i'm gonna go slightly out of order to introduce whoever is reading this to my personal brain blorbos. Fair warning all of these are TTRPG characters, mostly my NPCs save for the first two!

A. Why are you excited about this character?

Fanny Paine - ohhhh my beloved Trigun cowgirl OC. I'm so excited to see how her backstory kicks her in the ass (and by backstory, I DO mean her childhood best friend-turned-EOM member Nova).

Sylvie - my tiefling phantom rogue!! She was a joy to play and an absolute bullet in combat. Lethal and impossible to hit. She also was part of the conflict, being a double agent for the big bad's Vecna cult. I spent so much time texting the DM in secret during our sessions as if the BBEG and Sylvie were sending letters back and forth, telling him our whereabouts, before he'd drop in some cult mooks and we'd knock 'em dead. So fun.

Brie - Shadow Sorcerer and Secret goddess of fire! She's from my first campaign but still relevant because I have two groups playing in that world. In one group we have a ranger who denounced his cult to the fire god, so it'll be really fun to reveal that his god is actually the half-elf barmaid they keep seeing in every tavern, and she's way more chill than he thought.

Iris and Humboldt - ah yes. My older (late 50s) human wizard/leader of the largest adventuring guild in my dnd world and her autistic gnome husband who.... looks like Jack Black in Jumanji and accidentally brought on the apocalypse in our first campaign. They're my light academia escapism blorbos now and all they do is sit around and study magic in the coolest city in my world.

Ron - New NPC the party adopted, and he's an amnesiac, kinda undead paladin with spore druid flavoring. The party recently discovered he's.... well, he's Oberon. Not sure how he got here, but the Warlock's patron is Titania. Of the summer court. Yeah, that one. One of the party's quests right now is to retrieve Ron's memories and return him to Titania, and maybe the warlock will get *her* husband back from the Feywild. However, some mysterious figures want Ron dead....

Oh fuck I could also talk about Keats, Tarovir, Vaemyx... AAH too many. But I'm gonna stick to these big ones, plus Tarovir and Vaemyx have massive spoilers for my players D:

H. What trait do you admire most?

Fanny - girl's got gut. She really is "shoot first, ask questions later."

Sylvie - Resilience? She almost died, admitted she had been a spy, and almost got killed by the party all in one day. And then her best friend, the only one who trusted her, died. Thank god she ended up happy.

Brie - she loves her friends and loves to have fun. She's chaotic good in the funniest ways. When I play her I just get to be stupid.

Iris and Humboldt - THEY LOVE EACH OTHER. SO MUCH. SAVED EACH OTHER BACK TO BACK WHEN THE ALMOST DOOMED THE WORLD. Seriously, I rolled Iris' portent rolls and got an 18 and a 20 the day they summoned the BBEG. If it wasn't for that, Humboldt would have failed his death saves.

Ron - man look, he's just taking it day by day. He's very tired. But at least he has a lot of patience.

13. What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?

Fanny - she wears mostly browns but has a blue undershirt. She looks best in blue!

Sylvie - blue and silver coded. Looks best in black and dark blues.

Brie - wears cream and blues, would look great in green!

Iris and Humboldt - blues/silvers and browns respectively

Ron - this man is covered in dirt. Like he deserves.

28. Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth?

Yes - Sylvie, Iris

No - Fanny, Brie, Humboldt, Ron (he can't lie, doesn't like lies - he's Fey after all)

31. Who are they the most glad to have met?

Fanny - Charlie, her new friend who is an EOM reject. Fanny is a very protective momma bird.

Sylvie - her best friend, the elven druid Eldrid.... who died. It was really fucking sad, I miss that PC. They were in so many cahoots together.

Brie - the first party I ever DM'd, who adopted her <3

Iris and Humboldt - I could say each other, but really the party was the only reason they got together - they set them up on their first date!

Ron - He knows, like, 3 people.

[astarionfreak]

writing patterns tag game!

tagged by @scaryanneee (thank you!)

Rules: list the first line(s) of your last 10 posted fics and see if there's a pattern!

1. Palisade afternoon | Astarion x Fem!reader

The dress you’re meant to wear to the party is hanging near the bed. It’s beautiful. You hate it.

2. Exile (Or: How you learned to stay) | Astarion x Fem!Reader & Shadowheart x Fem!Reader

It’s pouring rain. You’re running. Your bare feet carry you over cobblestones, through alleyways — always in shadow. Never in the light.

3. You'll hate me (make love) | Ascended Astarion x Fem!Reader

This is the last place you should be. He’s not the man you fell in love with. Not anymore. The Rite of Profane Ascension corrupted him — of course it did.

4. Carve it in red | Ascended Astarion x Serin (Fem!Durge)

Astarion stood in the garden, a solitary figure, silhouetted by a low-hanging blood moon. He often found himself here when he needed a moment of quiet reflection.

5. At least you purr for me | Astarion x Fem!Reader

“Alright, soldier. Your turn. Top three orgasms, let’s fucking go,” Karlach says.

You feel the heat rise in your face, you’re blushing. You glance up at Astarion, who is looking at you with an almost smug expression from across the campfire. Does he really expect you to say his name?

6. The blood on your hands is mine | Astarion x Wren (Fem!Durge)

The blighted village was only intended to be a pit stop on their way to locate the druid. But in her haste, Wren led them right into a trap. The goblins had the high ground and they managed to dole out some damage before they finally fell to arrows and spells.

7. Beg like you need it | Astarion x Tessa (Fem!Tav) x Gale

Gale glanced around the room as if expecting another guard to arrive at any moment. “I don’t believe resorting to violence was necessary in this particular instance.”

Astarion stared longingly at the blood on his dagger, almost as if considering licking it. He wiped it off on the guard’s sleeve instead. “Don’t be so wet behind the ears.”

8. Now that his heart beats | Ascended Astarion x Fem!Reader

A warm breeze dances across the garden. You lay in Astarion’s arms, on the lawn, near the roses. You are so still that you can count each blade of grass that bends and sways, brushing against your bare arms and legs.

9. The lick of poison | Astarion x Naenia (Fem!Tav)

“Remind me why we had to return to this vile place?” Astarion gestured to the halls of the Arcane Tower with a flourish.

“Timmask Spores and Tongue of Madness. For Omeluum,” Naenia said. “I’m certain I saw some here. We won’t be long.”

10. You're mine, remember? | Ascended Astarion x Cassowary (Fem!Spawn)

Gale pulled Cassowary into a warm embrace, the likes of which she had not experienced since her transformation. She breathed him in — allowed the beat of his heart, the rush of blood in his veins, and his scent to overwhelm her senses. Gods. His scent — he smelled of old books bound in leather, and the subtle smokey aroma of amber.

---

Patterns? Umm. I'm sure there's something there that I haven't noticed. I usually try to give the reader some sense of where the character is physically as early as possible (even if in the last one that location is just Gale's arms lol). My favorite intro is the one I wrote for Exile (second favorite is probably the one for At least you purr for me). I know that wasn't the question, but I'm rambling now. Okay, byeee.

---

Tagging @charmandabear

[inkyquince]

my dark urge is the grimiest looking motherfucker ever right now, missing eye replaced by volos lil replacement one, veiny as fuck cause of course he fucked the emperor AND took the astral tadpole, on top of being a circle of spores druid who likes to keep body parts for funsies and to seed them with spores, lets just say i about nutted when I saw the myconid colony and soveirgn spaw, i love ur druid durge tho, luv hearing about ur playthroughs!

THE THING IS, IN OUR GROUP, ALL DARK URGES ARE GRIMY AND MEAN, HELL, MY OTHER PLAYTHROUGJ WITH DARK URGE IS THIS MEAN ASS FUCKER CALLED RUNE

Can you tell I love drows?

Anyway, I decided that I gotta make a stupidly pretty Disney princess they/them of a half elf WHO IS ALSO A CIRCLE OF SPORES DRUID, AND ON GOD, they're my favourite character I've made. A pretty half elf druid? Sure but they're also a nasty fucking bhaalspawn that loves mushrooms and necromancy. Legitimately loves animals more than people and therefore wiped out an entire temple of gith cuz fuck those kids.

[gidianthe]

jaz - first ever tav & finished the game with her. my cinnamon apple. oath of ancients paladin married to shadowheart

nav - wild magic barbarian i made for a multiplayer game with gwen that we havent gone back to in like a month. whoops. she and laezel are girl yaoing it up in heaven

sav - assassin rogue/gloomstalker durge who murder kills so good like is so fucking good at it but also hates the perverted joy they get whenever they spill blood so theyre hanging onto that "resist the urge" journal entry with their fingernails. romancing shaddy

dawn - selunite cleric / oath of devotion paladin. romancing shadowheart obviously. literally just a good boy and faerun's most princely handsome butch and thats her entire job and shes doing it great. she's ken

taz - frenzy barbarian literally been running on adrenaline nonstop since the nautiloid crashed she's just smashing her way through everything including that gith pu-*the sniper*

genuinely cannot remember her name rn and bg3 keeps crashing when i try to launch it again - fighter dark urge. going to be evil-leaning but more in an uncaring self preserving practicality way of siding with the more powerful in any situation. enjoying the violence sure but its more abount keeping herself alive so that she can find out what happened to her and tear apart the person who fucked her over. hence her helping minthara. thats definitely the only reason

ash - bhaal's prettiest princess is having the worst fucking time of her life. tiefling druid of spores so she's getting bullied from both sides in act 1. everywhere she goes its like i can hear her just saying "this sucks i hate this". shes already so sick and tired of this adventure but the thing keeping her going is sneaking glances at karlach outta the corner of her eye every 5 seconds

don - this guy is a remake of a previous durge guy that i made bc the previous durge guy i suddenly realized looked far too much like the american biblical jesus christ from the bible and i had to get rid of him. he's gonna romance astarion bc ive heard so much about durge/astarion that i gotta. oh and an oathbreaker paladin

sora - dark urge monk. honestly half my reason for this is my friend mentioned a dragonborn monk tav he has and i in my head was like fuck now i wanna do one. ive been wanting to start a monk playthrough for a while now anyway and now i have her :l laezel gets to kiss a red dragon now <3

ta'lia - draconic sorcerer gith cause fucking of course you gotta do one. idk where im even going with her other than kissing laezel

jinx - ex-angsty bard/fighter multiclass. based off a dnd oc i had 3 years ago but specifically my post-scene-era version of jinx. prolly gonna romance karlach cause god knows she loves a tough woman

jace - i dont have much to say abt this guy. he's starting as a sorcerer but he's gonna be my attempt at a jack of all trades character. might make him romance gale just for the sorcerer wizard dynamic and also theyre both disaster human guys

[name unknown] - this little fucker is a rogue bhaalist military asset and a danger to public safety. gortash hsd deployed reaper drones equipped with missiles to take her out. this pink tiefling bard has zero regard for human life and in fact takes extremely unnecessary pleasure in gutting ripping tearing bloody murder. she's so fucking nasty and evil in a silly way

im gonna get a screenshot of all my tavs and durges in one post

[jacqcrisis]

omg second surprise dnd mutual this week 👀👀 tell me about ur characters plssss

Okay, so I have several I've played and I like a lot so I'm gunna put this under a read more

my first dnd character was for 3.5e, and his name was Deklan and he was a half-elf ranger who honestly did not want to be an adventurer, but who dreamed of being a carpenter. He was very good at shoot and talk, and had a very tired, over-all-of-this personality when not rolling charisma and spent a lot of time carving ducks. 

Next was was Mehlz, a bronze Dragonborn cleric for 5e. She was neutral good, believed in helping and healing those in need, was naive and kind of gullible as she was raised in a Temple of Bahamut as an orphan and oh God I have so much character work for her and so much worldbuilding for the insular Dragonborn nation she came from that I actually am going to re-use it somehow. Anyways, she was very good at hit thing with hammer and shoot lightning and the only character figurine i ever made off roll20 like 6 years ago

i love her so much. My favorite thing about her gamewise is that she had the Tavern Brawler feat and used that liberally to proficiently throw her best friend and fellow party member as an improvised weapon. Said bff was a sentient red panda who was also a monk.

There was Virga for a modified Curse of Strahd campaign that took place in the real world so we were forced to be human. He was a terrible French Catholic priest who was extra as hell, a warlock for the Raven Queen, sarcastic and mean, and his preferred mode of fighting was smacking people with his silver tipped cane. He became a wereraven, had a Charisma score 22, and was the cause of one party member dying due to a critical failure which I felt SO BAD FOR. I genuinely liked playing as the Bird Man and his bitchy attitude and his ending was finally getting a date with the other wereraven dude he got cockblocked from flirting with twice previously.

Right now, we have Isaria, another half-elf and they are a circle of spores druid. They are very quiet, shy, have rather poor people skills (which is a first for me to make Charisma a dumb stat), and are often very blunt when talking to someone and in their actions. Their goal is to find a way to prolong life using necromancy after the traumatic death of most of their home village due to a famine and often slips away from the party to experiment with various poisons and potions and undead. They are honestly a druid for all the wrong reasons and I'm digging them so far. They are also the shortest character I’ve ever made.

Special mention to my Star Wars ttrpg character who was my all time favorite and a character I want to reuse elsewhere. Dekle' was a cyborg Zabrak space pirate with a Southern accent, a giant metal phrik-coated arm, and a penchant for robots and punching things really really good. In session three, she took a grenade to the face from a guy running into her on a speeder, in which her response was to punch the guy off the speeder, eat the explosion like a champ, and then steal the vehicle. She was a brick shithouse who dished out bullshit damage because it turns out the Star Wars ttrpg just has a lot of perks specifically for hand to hand combat and why the fuck would I be a jedi when I could be a walking tank? Her and her ward (a fellow party member and a force sensitive Twi'lek teenager who used force lightning and a wrist rocket) were the cause of many DM headaches for the dumb shit we did, up to and including jumping onto a TIE-fighter and punching in the windshield to pull the pilot out, nuking a room of stormtroopers, and beating in Darth Vader's face.

My favorite exchange EVER was when the game was starting out, and the jedi who joined up with Dekle' and her ward Ro'ena had noticed that Ro was force sensitive and used force lightning untrained. So she pulls Dekle' aside and asks point blank if Dekle' had ever notice anything off about Ro in the seven or so years she's been raising the Twi'lek. To which Dekle' responded 'who? the living taser?' before looking over at Ro for a second or two and then shrugging and continuing 'no, I ain't noticed nothing weird about her. why?' Just a defining moment for one dumbass butch space pirate.

And also special mention to a character I only played in three sessions of a Fallout game a friend was testing out. His name was Anders, he was a ghoul, and he was a lucky charismatic crackshot who broke the game so bad, I was jokingly banned from further playtests after he oneshot a dude in power armor with his shitty revolver. He's an OC I still think about because he's a trashfire, just an absolute garbage boy, no redeeming qualities, would sell you for one corn chip, 10/10 I love him very much.

[red-thorn]

...Inspirations for my Druid Tiefling ATAXIA... 🍄 Ataxia’s playlist 🍄 (Musings under the cut.)

*Alan Watts' ideas greatly influence Ataxia's philosophy, especially his ideas about "irreducible rascality". *Glass Animals (especially the ZABA album) and In This Moments' music were definitely inspirations when imagining Ataxia's energies. Kind of... an obscure, visceral weirdness and savage spirituality. "Half God Half Devil" is probably their theme song. *Prince's hair and fashion-sense is just too fabulous. Needed me some of that. *Ataxia is a Circle of Spores Druid, so I wanted some good, icky slime mold on here. While Ataxia enjoys the finer things in life, they also enjoy its decay, the dirt, and the things that spring from it. *I actually made them the colors of the nonbinary flag to help emphasize their gender, lol. Also it's a fucking good color scheme. Also they are intersex and that flag is similar colors, so it's perfect. *Ataxia runs an apothecary on the edge of whatever habitat they are drawn to. Much like Count D and his pet shop, it's got that mysterious and shady feeling to it. They often feign innocence while running a much more nefarious market. ...But truly, they are there to help. ;) *Grell Sutcliffe is a gender non-conforming actress with a taste for bloodshed, beautiful, fiendish people, and extravagance. She shares many traits with Ataxia. Also I think I was drawn to that sharp teeth and glasses look... *When I imagine how Ataxia looks in their shop, I think of how Yuuko Ichihara lounges about on her furniture. Also Ataxia loves imbibing substances with others, too, heh heh.

[jeeperso]

D&D Quotes Without context

Miscellaneous Edition, for those quotable lines from between sessions

"All I wanna do, is fork a giant woman! A giant woman!" "Jonni, I'm pretty sure she is some type of undead, probably a vampire. Are you sure that is a good idea?" "If I don’t get turned into a blueberry it won’t be my worst date." "Okay, but if you have to defend yourself just don't burn the place down for once." "Oh, Nyx. Sweet summer child. I never make promises we both know I won’t even try to keep." "Jonni, if I wake up to my bed surrounded in flames again I'm short-sheeting your next bed every night for at least a month." "I know you're trying to score here, but Lady Dimitrescu's daughters are literally vampires AND bugs. I can overlook one, but as a Paladin, it is my sacred duty to burn this place to the ground and stir the ashes."

"We don't let Marshall make breakfast anymore." "Those waffles are well-fortified." "I'm going to be charitable and call it hardtack." "We can use these waffles as melee weapons." "Well if we need to deflect siege engines they'll be good to have." "This is still carbon based and digestible by human systems without any poisons." "I can't serve this. It'll cause ... death." "Marshal we've been over this. This Pizza has 10% less of a lethal amount of grease." "Plus they signed the waivers when they bought a ticket. It's fine." "And don't forget to push the Cakeon." "Cakeon being slices of cake wrapped in bacon." "The special sauce is a mixture of mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, ranch, horseradish, cheddar cheese, sour cream, and anything unfortunate enough to fall into the mixing vat."

"You do have a copy of the legal code I requested in my letter? As landed gentry you should actually have legal avenues to... I'm sorry did you say Burning child?"

"First I'm going to nail a crossbow bolt through your heart. Then I'm going to mount your balls to walls on opposite sides of this chamber." "I need Three Barrels of Butter" "Are you serious? Those Claws could crush an elephant in full plate!" "You're Right!" *Turns to first person* "We might need more than three barrels of butter."

"So Ioun is the patron of poor college kids. that scans "

"its hardtack or a mug of molten cheese-fried... something in a woven mug of bacon. your choice."

"Welp, all this coke ain't gonna snort itself..."

"Right hand me that dress and the bail money. I'll get Jonni." OOC: Well I mean they allow men in the city. Its just no men live in the city. "I stand by my statement. I'm allowed to look pretty every now and then." OOC: And dragons are the most unprejudiced lovers of anyone after bards.

OOC: Well I mean come on, its Ravenloft: saying a place is of death and madness is like making the observation the day ends in y. "Going out. Getting laid." "Jonni, she’s a werewolf." "Going out, forking a werewolf." OOC: Well Lycanthropy isn't usually sexually transmitted. Its just that Mercedes is a biter. OOC: ...I don't have an appropriate response to that.

"You seriously think I’d turn on my friends for a pile of gold?!?" "sigh I’ll show you my tits. "Hot damn, let’s get these murders done!" "No, Jonni, stay good. Besides, there are plenty of other girls who will do that without asking you to murder us." "Hmmmm… this is the moral quandary of my life…" "I’ll give you five bucks." "Scales tipped!" "Phew, I thought I was going to have to cover her next trip to the topless bar." "No, no, I have the bail money right here."

Nyx: So what’s the inside of Jonni’s head like? Edmund (with thousand yard stare): Imagine every ladies only smut magazine you’ve ever heard of going on forever into infinity while everything is on fire. Food was good though.

"It’s cool. They stole it." "And you know this how?" "Magic." “90% of Ravenloft deaths are mysterious vanishings.” "Why does everything come out covered in glitter and … is that …" "Lube. I’ve got a few theories." "Please don’t share them."

OOC: This is a plan that ends with Strahd having fewer brides, his castle is in flames, and he’s lost his cape.

OOC: Our team consists of a horny pyromancer, a gnome who can fillete you in five seconds, an HP lovecraft protagonist with actual magic backing them up, a literal slab of iron with a face, and a guy with a "I went to the eternal city of Ryleth and all I got was PTSD and this lousy T shirt". Gorbash smashing his shield into their face: "Have! You! Considered! Therapy!" OOC: Good news is you guys will no longer be the most conspicuous guys at the masquerade now. Jonni: Challenge accepted! "Nyx, the bounty on stealing his fake mustache is still on."

"Vanilla is the king of flavors. What does it say about society where vanilla is considered just 'regular'?" "That they have a lot of vanilla." Lash: "Don’t you want wishes?" Jonni: "Do I need wishes to get to see you naked?" Lash: "No?" Jonni: "Fuck ‘em." Vesh: "Oh dammit its my arranged fiance." Pit Fiend: "Milady." Vesh: "An extra wish to whoever punches this douchecanoe in the nards." Jonni: "I wish…for Bigby’s clenched fist of nard punching."

Soth: "Oh, gods, why am I on fire and why is Immigrant Song playing?" Jonni: "Take a guess." Hazlik: "Okay, so its a partridge, stuffed inside a chicken, stuffed inside a duck, stuffed inside a turkey, and the whole thing is fried on a stick. Congratulations, that's the most horrible thing I have ever seen, and I once crossbred an elephant and an owl." "I give him the 'itis, and we run like we stole something." OOC: ...weirdly Curse of Strahd has stats for Strahd zombies but not Strahd Skeletons. Or Strahd's skeletal Steed. Strahd once went to a branding seminar hosted by Bane and it changed his life.

"Are we on a high enough floor that if I throw him through the window he'll be killed by the fall?" "Oh, but when I say stuff like that it’s all 'Jonni, murder is wrong.'" "When they say pick your battles they don't mean to pick all of them. That's too many battles Jonni. Put some back." OOC: He's technically already got a symbiote. OOC: They can get married. Gorbash: "I'm increasing the rent." Venom: "Can I keep the pool table?" Gorbash: "I'm not a monster." Giant Brain: "Jonni… I have summoned you here for… WHY AM I ALREADY ON FIRE! PUT ME OUT! PUT ME OUT!"

"Hello We're the party-crashers. This is Jonni, she's here to steal your women and burn your shit down. That's Nyx, she's going to repatriate certain items from the premise. Marshal over there, is here to studiously ignore our shenanigans. This is the New Guy. He seems pretty chill. I'm Gorbash... and I have been distracting you."

"Will you walk into my parlour?" said a spider to a fly. Jonni: "Hold up. Trying to sex a spider." Nyx: (throws her hands up) And then Jonni wakes up with a spider venom hangover webbed to a wall waiting to be eaten. Jonni: "Eh, I’ve had worse one night stands. I’m not a fucking blueberry." OOC 1: Hey, where does your weed elf grow [her] crops? OOC 2: She probably just grows them in the room she hasn’t paid rent on. OOC 3: Because I was also considering a circle of spores druid tortle. OOC 2: We could be partners! We could turn this into road to el dorado staring Cheech and Chong. OOC: Wait, I just realized five people are hanging out in a pirate bar, and none of us are rogues. We are gonna need someone to get thieves tools. OOC: We have a barbarian with a big stick.

"Are we Foxhound now? Blunderbuss Octopus." OOC1: You want to put the stoner in charge of food. OOC2: Eyup. OOC1: I see no way this can go wrong! OOC3: We need the four basic food groups. Beans, Bacon, Whisky, and Lard. “We pray to Almighty Darkseid! Give us a sign! Thumbs up, for the triumph of the human spirit! Thumbs down to begin the everlasting reign of darkness!” “Where did you find this guy?” “Me? I thought you hired him.” OOC: Yup, nature, arcana, history, investigation and religon at +6. MJ got baked and watched the Discovery Orb a lot. Tordek: "But we have a cleric, Jozan, over there." Strahd: *sigh* Snaps fingers, and suddenly one of Strahd's brides sucks Jozan out the window, cue screaming. "Oh look, you suddenly have an opening, how fortunate." Tordek: "We also have a druid...." Vadania: "SHUT UP, TORDEK!" Edmund: "I think the first order of business may be to discuss your Human Resources strategy..." Strahd: "I have a guy for that too."

"When someone as smart as him talks with himself, it's not crazy...They call it monologing." "I thought it was soliloquy?" "No, soliloquy is when you're talk at someone else when your talking to yourself." "Most people would run from a demon, you run towards it to study it." Professor: "THIS IS ABSOLUTELY FASCINATING! A FROGHEMOTH, AND RIGHT UP CLOSE, IT WILL BE AMAZING TO SEE THIS PERFECT KILLING MACHINE IN ACTION." OOC: Also note the Professor is Lawful Good, Archie is Chaotic Good, so collectively they balance out to Neutral good. OOC: That's good. "The incinerations will continue until morale improves!" “You never incinerate the women!” “Because I’m fucking them!” “I… was not expecting you to be so honest about that…”

"You got what you wanted....but you lost what you had...." "Yes, I'm familiar with how capitalism works."

OOC: Dragons are like, “That’s Krandor the shiney. He only fucks other dragons. Weirdo.”

Gorbash: "D'awww, so tiny... perfect size... FOR PUNTING!" *boots tiny mind-flayer into the horizon*

"Dracula hasn't been spotted in almost recently. Whats he gonna do, destroy all we know and love like he definitely can?" "... my god you people are too stupid to live." "What are you doing in my house?" Gorbash: "...well Edmund has been reading your books, I've been sorting through your armory, Nyx and Irost has been going through your other shinies, Marshal has been cleaving anything monstrous that gets too close, and Jonni has been lighting things on fire to stave off boredom." Gorbash: "Okay Marshal, Jonni. Rock, paper, scissors over who gets [to kill] the bishop."

Jonni: "Did you really think this would make up for what you did?" Nima: "I… killed everyone you grew up with." Jonni: "Yeah, and I’m still not forgiving you for what you did to Eddie." Nima: "I am missing some key context here…" Nima: "Also I committed identity theft on you by having my new undead army tell everyone you are running the show." Jonni: "Oh, no. You’ve fooled the boar tribe. Who still haven’t figured out shitting in a hole." Nima: "Yeah I noticed that. I ruined two pairs of shoes attacking their camps."

[thewildnopeboat]

Favorite character moments from campagins I've been in:

1.Halfling Bard (Pan) defeating a dragon bone golem using a fire breath potion and being on top of it

2. Crazy Life cleric (Artz) living after the main party died, on a quest to kill all bandits with extreme prejudice

3. Goliath HexPali (Hilda) crit smiting some undead.

4. Halfelf bard (Mordecai) trying and failing to seduce a single lady at the bar, poor guy.

5. Bugbear Barbarian (Carry) comforting an equally dumb af Flesh Golem about past traumas. Also got a sword out of it

6. Goliath paladin (Karne) making a third option of repairing the world after being the only one to past through a barrier and pulling something our artificer would call a "Hail Mary"

7. Spore Druid(Mushroom Dance) breaking the oneshot with so many undead (because we didn't read the amount I could control) and constantly being a menace enough to get disintegrated by the DM

8. Ursine Barbarian (Bear) becoming both smoky the bear and the reason why bears shouldn't have thumbs

9. Gnome Cleric of Trickery(Hilde) fucking over the oneshot because she double crossed the others.

10. Half Goliath/Half Elf cleric of Trickery (Yursia) running a all time theft ring in her school

11. Drow cleric of Trickery (Elvanarra) showing emotion to her teammates because she actually told the truth to get their trust, oh and her god/emotional support drunk of a god being almost killed.

I may be missing a oneshot or two, but I love my problematic characters. Just wanted to share!

[casualnepotism]

truly i cannot stop thinking about leveling past 20 cause the fuckin ancestral guardian barbarian multiclass potential is SO STRONG cause i. sunny's so frustrated and lonely and scared and it's all about to manifest into genuine rage like i can feel it building and i'm not sure where it's gonna explode at yet but it's there and that outlet is gonna be amazing but ALSO just narratively she's been meditating a lot with her brother recently and getting in touch with the world and the vibes and feels and thinking about how important family is and even though she says fuck the elves she means fuck their government and their refusal to help the world she desperately wants to know what was so important that it took her father away not once but twice she doesn't care who her mother is but she knows she was an elf so where is she what happened to separate the two of them not to mention how close she and her adopted grandparents were she loved them they're her ancestors even more than her genetic line plus ALSO she's been all about wanting to protect for so long and is impossible to kill but can only heal she can't actually stop the damage and with ancestral abilities she could just please see with me the knowledge that she could recklessly attack, forcing her enemy to have disadvantage against her friends and make them resistant to the damage while also making herself a more attractive target and also use her salt ability to put disadvantage on another enemy basically locking down at least two enemies a round not to mention that after multiclassing she wouldn't need the hoodie anymore she could give it to dennis who stands so bravely up in front with her even though he only has 150 hit points and has already died once or she could give it to nilos who she loves and who can't heal and can't escape and she could keep them safe just by giving them a shirt PLUS ALSO i've just been thinking a lot about tattoos and how sunny wants them but we never have time to wait around for her to get one and also how much fuckin food imagery we use especially mushrooms (@the fruit guild we just be like that) and how her father was a spores druid and how his healing tasted like cream of mushroom soup and how beautiful it would be for her to heal during a rage and for it to visualize as a resonance-blue spectral hand pressing over her wound healing it and leaving a small mushroom tattoo that glows with power and magic because she's always hurt (that tank life) but she has so many hit points and it's always more important to heal someone else so she never gets magical healing so all her wounds just have to wait and heal during rests so she's so much more fucked-up looking than the rest of the party and she's not resentful about it she'd rather they were safe and healthy but it would be nice sometimes, wouldn't it? to be taken care of?? god AND at later levels she would get spirit shield which would let her literally protect her friends from harm and i can't stop thinking about a spectral hand reaching out from her to just catch a bullet before it impacts cog or leaning over and shoving dennis to run just a little faster so the punch that comes hits him just a little less and i CANNOT STOP THINKING about the first time she gets to fight alongside her brother after the multiclass when he still doesn't know and he takes a hit and a full fucking body manifestation of her dads, her adopted dads, the men who raised her and who love her, who desperately want to also adopt her brother into their little family, step out from around him to keep him safe from harm i simply cannot i weep when i think about how much sunny loves and loves and loves her family and what she'll do to make them safe

[hawkesvarric]

ok ok before I have to go clean my apartment and get ready for work tomorrow ;n; here’s my faves from the new Tasha’s subclasses!!! bc I am very excited for them!!! manifesting for 2021 that I get to be a player in a regular game and try them out myself~

Artificer - Battle Smith!! they’re all fun though, I love the homunculus servant + replicating magical items.

Barbarian - Path of the Beast is just everything to me. adds a lot of flavor to rages beyond just “rawr I’m angery.” I’m obsessed with Wild Magic in all its forms, but I do wish the subclass actually allowed you to cast. even fighter gets a casting subclass, you know? :/

Bard - eh. you can’t even make magic items with Creation and Eloquence is just okay? not really my type of thing. 

Cleric - Order domain is really fun, you’re sort of paladin-y but combine that with cleric abilities? Sexy. I love Twilight in aesthetic/vibes, but the subclass itself is a bit lacking. 

Druid - Circle of Stars!!! not just bc it’s STARS lol I really love the starry form ability and how it gets even more powerful later on. it doesn’t beat out Shepherd as my favorite circle, but damn does it come close. Spores is also very good and Wildfire is too though I feel like only focusing on one element is a bit meh.

Fighter - PSI WARRIOR I AM OBSESSED!!!! I am rolling up one as we speak. RIP to those who think fighter is a boring class, but I’m different. <3 I like Rune Knight a lot, but the giant thing I wish was more optional? I get why they added it, but maybe you’re running a game where runes aren’t made by the giants and then it’d be weird to have those abilities, you know?

Monk - Way of Mercy. there is literally nothing about it I do not like. it is everything I have ever wanted out of the monk class which was already my favorite class to begin with, so like???? I’m in love. Astral Self is interesting too, not normally my sort of thing, but I think they made it functionally better and it has a lot of neat abilities.

Paladin - FINALLY some good fucking food! Paladin’s my least favorite class, so WOTC had their work cut out for them making me care, and boy did they deliver. while Watcher is a bit campaign dependent (if you’re not running a game w extraplanar threats then like RIP), but GOD those vibes. and Oath of Glory is just so goddamn sexy even though I wished they kept calling it Oath of Heroism like in the UA. whatever, I love both a lot. 

Ranger - nothing beats out Gloom Stalker IMO, they really peaked w that one. Swarmkeeper’s interesting in theory, but it’s kinda weak. I do like the fix they introduced for Beast Master though, that’s nice.

Rogue - Phantom is just so sexy. I’ve already rolled one, my girl Iridessa whom I am obsessed with, and look at those damn abilities. ty WOTC for the excellent meal. Soulknife is also so fucking sexy. I love them both.

Sorcerer - them new metamagic options though 👀 Clockwork Soul’s so interesting omg, but I gotta give it to Aberrant Mind. just an absolutely batshit powerful but weird af sorcerer is everything to me.

Warlock - I think both patrons are just a bit lacking, but I have to go w Genie bc A it really coincidentally fits in w my campaign I’m running for my friends hehe but more importantly B I am obsessed w limited wish!!!!! that is so GOOD!!!!

Wizard - Order of Scribes is SO good, wow! it’s everything I’ve ever wanted from wizard!!! Bladesinging is interesting, but if I wanted to go more combat heavy, I wouldn’t go wizard lol so to me I’m not super into it. I’d much rather have a sentient spellbook.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

top 10 podcast characters! (sorry if i spam, lol, your answers for stuff are always so much fun!!)

10.) Daisy Tonner (The Magnus Archives). another returning favorite from my list of favorite female characters yesterday. she’s truly got it all: fucked up past, connection to a sinister power that she’s struggling to control, homoerotic co-dependence with her best friend, basically a werewolf... I am obsessed. @ Jonny Sim bring her back immediately so I can be furious at you for however much she’s suffering.  

9.)  Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale). this is like... my podcast dad. or, no, scratch that. my podcast cool uncle. I exist in a state of being permanently behind on Welcome to Night Vale these days, but every time I go back I hear Cecil’s voice and my brain fills up with exclamation marks as I feel like I’m being welcomed back home. I love this brave, weird little radio host. also, according to recent episodes, he and his husband get up to some kinky shit, and I sort of feel like Amy in the “booOOOOOne????” scene of B99 but also good for them !!

8.)  Jonathan Sims (The Magnus Archives). I don’t know, I’m just obsessed with this story and this sad dumpster of a man! I can’t even really explain what I like about him; on paper I don’t think I do but he’s really burrowed into my heart and gotten cozy there. his life is such a mess and I want him to be okay! like actually okay! he’s definitely not going to be and it’s going to mess me up a lot.

7.)  Bellow (Rude Tales of Magic). An incredibly recent addition to this list, since I started listening to RToM all of a week ago, but I just... really like this good good boy. at first glance you’re like “okay, that’s an annoying tiefling frat boy, ew” and five minutes later you realize he’s actually just a super chill sweetheart who offers to help everybody he meets and remembers all the NPC’s names when no one else ever does. there’s no normal-sounding way to explain this but he tries very hard to potty train a 4 foot tall rat man after everyone else has given up on him and it’s very sweet in the WEIRDEST way.

6.) Taako Adventurezone (The Adventure Zone: Balance). I can’t even quite put my finger on what it is with this dude... well, I kind of can. I knew he was gay going into the podcast and I always latch onto the queers (I mean... look at this list lmao), but that’s not all it is. Justin McElroy is just a damn good D&D player and makes a lot of really thrillingly creative character choices both in character and out, and I can always be won over by jerks who are secretly pretty okay.

5.) Moonshine Cybin (Not Another D&D Podcast). my fungal queen! NADDPOD is the first not-TAZ D&D podcast I got Extremely into and it’s just... such a breath of fresh air to have a woman in a game of D&D? which isn’t a dunk on the McElboys at all, but god, Emily Axford is such a fun and creative player, and Moonshine is an absolutely delight. disaster bisexual hick elf druid with a big gooey heart while reveling in spores and decay? that’s a big yes from me.

4.) Lord Arum (The Penumbra Podcast). it should surprise absolutely NO ONE that W39 and the Penumbra dominated the top spots; that’s just who I am as a person right now. anyway, Arum’s a stubborn bisexual lizard man with four arms who complains constantly to hide the fact that he’s a huge softy who doesn’t know how to handle anything, especially having a crush on two people who are supposed to be his sworn enemies. it’s like someone wrote a character SPECIFICALLY for me to be into. 

3.) Isabel Lovelace (Wolf 359). Lovelace also got a spot on yesterday’s top 10 female characters list, and I can’t... not... put her on this one, too. I said a lot of what I love about her there, which is that I’m always a sucker for a badass lady who’s been through hell and come out the other side rattled but determined to keep doing her best. Lovelace is a delightfully contradictory lady and beautifully acted by Cecilia Lynn-Jacobs, and I love the shit out of her.

2.) Juno Steel (The Penumbra Podcast). how do I even start to explain how much Juno means to me?? he was one of the very first explicitly, canonically bisexual podcast protags I got to know, his struggles with depression knock me off my feet every time, his ultimate resolve to grow and do better by others makes me want to cry a sweater of tears, and his relationship with gender gently opened the door for me to become comfortable with so many things about myself. Juno Steel, you dumb bitch, I love you.  

1.) Daniel Jacobi (Wolf 359). this is going to be so melodramatic after my gushing about Juno but I just like this one because I’m gay; that’s literally all there is to it. Jacobi is a shitty little trash man and I hate him and listening to his stupid voice shoots serotonin directly through my ears and into my brain. I wish I could explain my poor taste but truly I cannot.

[drinkingdeadpeopletea]

Random question! Any chance you could just give a quick rundown of who plays what role on NADDpod? And maybe what their characters' race/class is? I love reading your posts, but it would be cool to know who/what to picture at the same time. (A quick Google search didn't turn up a handy listing like I was hoping for, and I'm apparently very bad at searching fandom wikis haha)

I absolutely can!! and also god bless you for still following me dskfjdkfj absolutely incredible and I couldn’t recommend it more highly!

The core party, aka the Band of Boobs, is three people:

Hardwon Surefoot is a human* fighter who was raised in by dwarves in a dwarphanage. He’s played by Jake Hurwitz and he’s very prideful and strong and has a strong dumbass streak but also an absolute heart of gold and I love him a lot.

Moonshine Cybin is an elf druid from the Crick, a kind of backwater rural society of elves who are outcasts from high elven society. She’s a Circle of Spores druid so she’s all about mushrooms and hospitality, which is extremely important in the Crick. She also has a possum named PawPaw who is the only one in the podcast with plot armor. She’s played by Emily Axford, aka Fig Faeth/Sophia Lee in Dimension 20.

Beverly Toegold V is a fifteen-year-old halfling paladin who begins the podcast as a Green Teen trying to earn enough merit badges to become a full-fledged Green Knight. He’s a certified Good Boy played by Caldwell Tanner. 

This is probably my favorite art of the three of them, for picturing purposes :) 

Other important names you might hear me mention, all NPCs played by DM Brian “Murph” Murphy, aka Riz Gukgak/Kugrash on Dimension 20, are:

Balnor, the group’s unofficial dad, who joined the party when Bev drew the Knight card from the Deck of Many Things

Alanis, Ulfgar, and Thiala: the Legendary Heroes who “saved the realm” from Asmodeus a few years before the Band of Boobs ever met. Thiala is a human cleric who has.....gone dark. Ulfgar is a dwarven fighter. Alanis is an elf wizard who I fucking adore. I’m constantly emotional about her and about the legendary heroes in general. 

Erlin, Bev’s boyfriend and absolute sweetheart. 

anyway that’s the gang, I love all of them, I love this podcast

*SPOILER: he started out human but uhhhhh some shit went down and now you might see art of him with pointed ears. don't worry about it.